diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/images/4months.jpg b/textfiles.com/10/images/4months.jpg new file mode 100644 index 00000000..644e6f2a Binary files /dev/null and b/textfiles.com/10/images/4months.jpg differ diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/images/bpgsm.gif b/textfiles.com/10/images/bpgsm.gif new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f870dda6 Binary files /dev/null and b/textfiles.com/10/images/bpgsm.gif differ diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/images/dreamcom.jpg b/textfiles.com/10/images/dreamcom.jpg new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ab8170f8 Binary files /dev/null and b/textfiles.com/10/images/dreamcom.jpg differ diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/images/stuff.jpg b/textfiles.com/10/images/stuff.jpg new file mode 100644 index 00000000..93ff67b4 Binary files /dev/null and b/textfiles.com/10/images/stuff.jpg differ diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/images/theworks.jpg b/textfiles.com/10/images/theworks.jpg new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b3c521c0 Binary files /dev/null and b/textfiles.com/10/images/theworks.jpg differ diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/images/works.jpg b/textfiles.com/10/images/works.jpg new file mode 100644 index 00000000..502ad1a1 Binary files /dev/null and b/textfiles.com/10/images/works.jpg differ diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/images/works87.jpg b/textfiles.com/10/images/works87.jpg new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7e4513f7 Binary files /dev/null and b/textfiles.com/10/images/works87.jpg differ diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/index.html b/textfiles.com/10/index.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6acb50c6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/10/index.html @@ -0,0 +1,51 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +
+ + +
+ +>INTRODUCTION< 
+THE BBS YEARS 
+THE INTERNET 
+TEXTFILES 
+10 YEARS 
+ +		  + +
+ +THE 10 YEARS OF TEXTFILES + +
+ +In which a general welcome is extended, and the ground rules are laid out +

+Welcome to the textfiles.com tenth anniversary celebration section, a +collection of artifacts, essays and links composed for the textfiles.com +family of sites by its creator, Jason Scott. +

+In October of 1998, this website was created, and for the last decade has provided +history, nostalgia, reference, controversy, hilarity, and enjoyment for millions +of users around the world. As we round this important milestone, I thought it a fun +idea to look back on the beginnings of the site, history and trivia of both it and +the era it was meant to capture, and a tour of some of the more interesting bumps and +heights along the way. +

+The sections on the menu to the left can be clicked to directly, or you can follow +section by section through all of them as one large tour and essay. +

+Thanks for the memories. +

+- Jason Scott
+ TEXTFILES.COM +

+Now, let's see see where it all began.... +

+ +

+
+
+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/internet.html b/textfiles.com/10/internet.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd802f69 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/10/internet.html @@ -0,0 +1,75 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +
+ + +
+ +INTRODUCTION 
+THE BBS YEARS 
+>THE INTERNET 
+TEXTFILES 
+10 YEARS 
+ +		  + +
+ +THE INTERNET + +
+ +In which it all starts happening too fast +

+College happened for me in 1988, when I graduated from three wonderful years at Horace Greeley High +School and got into Emerson College in Boston, Massachusetts. I moved up there for my freshman year +and never went back; I live in that state to this day. With this move came a dorm room, no home +computer the first semester (my father thought it would be distracting) and, of course, the end of +the Works BBS. I closed it up, and in one of those situations that smacks of utter irony, my father +disposed of the hard drive of the computer, losing that part of my history permanently. +

+

+

+At Emerson, I came to eventually use the occasional bulletin board system, but the day to day living +on them ceased. Instead, I learned about what we now think of as the Internet, that globally connected +set of machines that allow people to be sitting at one computer and connect to many others. But in 1989 +it was a very different place. For someone who'd come up through bulletin boards, the discussions of +Usenet, the speed of file transfer, the depth of UNIX, the instantaneous connections, were mind blowing. +BBSes didn't have a chance; I was on the Internet to stay. +

+ +As I turned away from BBSes, one or two still stayed in my sights. A chance meeting on a computer +bulletin board put me in touch with one Dave Weinstock, later Dave Ferret, who offered to bring The Works +BBS back from the dead. I gave him my floppy backups of the BBS and he did so, running the BBS for +years and years, bringing it a fame and putting me in the initially uncomfortable position of emeritis +administrator. I watched a new generation live the amazing life I had, but ten years later and +with much better equipment. And a massive multi-line BBS in the Boston area called Argus, with its +dozens of phone lines and conferencing rooms, gave me a local place to hang out with the knowledge +that everyone there was probably in the city as well. For all its miracles, the Internet was never quite +so good at that side of things. +

+But it was good at so much more, and as the years went by, I watched it stun me further and further +with what so many great minds could produce. I used a protocol named Gopher that allowed you to traverse +computers as easily as a menu, and then watched this upstart called The World Wide Web stumble in years +later and eat Gopher's lunch. I gained accounts on computers all over, posted to message bases, and +watched the Web grow from a stack of grey pages into multi-colored sound and graphic extravaganzas. +Where once a night of calling bulletin boards would yield me a handful of paragraphs, I was heading +through what seemed like endless growing collections at a rate that put my previous years to shame. +

+By 1998, I'd been on the Internet for about 10 years. I'd used computers of one sort or another +for something like 20. I was, as people sometimes feel at that age, a hardened veteran and world-weary +traveler, wishing he could go back to simpler times when just seeing text moving slowly across the +screen opened a world. I missed the BBS years. I missed my BBS. I decided to go see what this massive +world wide web had to say about that time. +

+It didn't have much to say at all. +

+Learn about the website I put up.... +

+ +

+
+
+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/jason.html b/textfiles.com/10/jason.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8f234531 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/10/jason.html @@ -0,0 +1,169 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +
+ + +
+ +INTRODUCTION 
+>THE BBS YEARS< 
+THE INTERNET 
+TEXTFILES 
+10 YEARS 
+ +		  + +
+ +THE BBS YEARS + +
+ +In which a kid is handed the world, and holds it for safekeeping +

+My name is Jason Scott Sadofsky. I was born in 1970 in Hopewell Junction, NY, a very small suburb +located near the not-so-small town of Fishkill and next to the not-at-all-small city of Poughkeepsie. +My parents lived in a subdivision very near an apple orchard and surrounded by hills, some distance +from the IBM Fabrication plant my father was employed at, first as an engineer and later as a manager. +I'm the oldest of three children, and found myself in a pretty idyllic life in a beautiful location, +surrounded by friends, family and all the time in the world. I had it good. +

+ +To be born in 1970 means I am younger than Woodstock, UNIX, moon landings, multi-track recording, +radio, and jukeboxes. I am older, however, than Saturday Night Live, Cell Phones, MTV, +VHS Videotape, the FOX television network, and compact discs. And what I was born at just the right +time for was what is now thought of as the Home Computer Revolution. Now ubiquitous, the idea of the +computer in the home, as an appliance or tool in the hands of anyone who wanted them, was an idea +that had a lot of people throwing their best efforts into making a reality. But it wasn't a reality yet. +Computers of any sizeable processing power were massive, expensive, specialized, and primarily the +realm of the forces most powerful and/or armed. It was not in the realm of families living in +pleasant suburbs, even if a member of the household worked at the world's largest semiconductor plant. +

+Somewhere in the late 1970s, however, life changed both outside and inside my home; my parents divorced +and I became one of those kids shuttled between two homes and with no single place to call my +own. Because of this I began a process of attending multiple schools and living in various places in +the New York Hudson Valley, depending on finances and opportunities out of my control. Outside my +now-changed home life was the reality of the home computer coming to life. Companies like Commodore, +Apple, Atari and dozens of others began producing electronic machines that could do all sorts of tasks +and produce all sorts of interest and entertainment to the type of people that would find such things +interesting and entertaining. I became the member of the family who connected with them, and my father, +eager to nourish any such interest, began bringing home computers from work for me to try. +

+My first home computer was a Commodore PET, a machine with 8 kilobytes of memory, less than the size of +this document. It had a small, attached screen, black and white, providing 40 columns of fixed text +and the ability to program it in the BASIC computer language. I was absolutely fascinated with it, a +love that has continued to the present day. My siblings were not quite as interested but for me this +was a true connection, something I really enjoyed playing with and learning on. And in what perhaps +indicates where my own history would take me, I still have this Commodore PET. +

+As the Commodore PET gained new friends over the years (my Atari 800 and IBM PC, Commodore Amiga, +and others), I gained a real interesting perspective on these machines. I saw them as they were when +they were new, young, hungry and fighting for market share, promising the universe for a few hundred +dollars and using all the marketing muscle they could to prove it. The advertisements they printed +were amazing, the magazine articles were fascinating, and I soaked it all in. This was a wondrous +time to be so young, a pre-teen learning about machines that would, with a few typed characters +(OK, a TON of typed characters) sing, dance, play games, and do amazing stuff for me. Having seen what +was before, I was always up for what was next. +

+

+

+On one of my visits to my father, he had to go into work for part of the day at his new position in the +Thomas J. Watson Research Center in Yorktown Heights, and took me along. To keep his son occupied, he +set me up in front of a terminal called the 3279x, a powerful and amazing machine that connected deep +into the IBM network and computing facilities. In comparison to what the home computers I owned had, this +was like taking someone who'd only ever ridden a bicycle and handing them the keys to a supersonic jet. +Naturally, I played games on it, games I couldn't ever hope to see on my machines at home, text adventures that challenged me intellectually, and even the engineering in-jokes of the programmers +at IBM, always looking for the next best place to eat or writing hilarious essays about life at IBM +or the engineering life. It was heavenly, but I knew when we logged out I'd never see anything like +that outside of my occasional visit to this amazing building. +

+Luckily, I was wrong. +

+

+

+I still remember the day, when I was visiting my friend Chris Boufford at the house he shared with his +grandparents, that he told me I had to check out what his grandfather had brought home. +

+It was a 300 baud acoustic modem, a strange little device with a couple strange pads on the top +and a wire going to the home computer his grandfather owned. Chris called a number he had written +down, placed the screaming telephone handset into the pads, and on the screen, text started to appear. +Text, I realized, that was coming from somewhere else. Text that was coming from another machine +to this one over the phone. I was 12. Nothing would be the same. +

+We were connecting to another person's home computer via this modem and phone line, and using software +that provided you with the ability to leave messages, read up on information, even acquire programs +you could run on your own computer without having to go to someone's house and copy their floppy disk +collection. It was a Computer Bulletin Board System, or BBS. There weren't many, but there were enough +that we could call into a bunch of places and get hooked. Naturally, I went home with visions of having +one of these modems and all this access into these computers from my own house. +

+Dad was accomodating, as he's always been. Through his connections I became the owner of a 2400 baud +Hayes Modem, a card that sat inside our IBM PC and let me call all over the county, state, and the +world and connect to all these BBSes. I was in heaven... +

+...for about a month, and then the $300 phone bill came in. Dad invented new ways to scream, and I +learned that I was going to have to do something about this if I wanted to continue to use these +bulletin board systems, so I started reading up and asking the right questions and found myself able +to get around the whole problem of paying large phone bills by stealing phone codes. I became what +I thought of as a "Phone Phreak", although the years hence have taught me that I was barely more than +a bottom-feeding leech, tracking down and gaining free telephone calls just to avoid paying money. +Learning and exploration was the last thing on my mind. +

+Or was it? As I started calling dozens and then hundreds of bulletin board systems, I found myself +constantly drawn to the strange conversations, the ability to download software, and the information +that was being presented in various menus. While the phone system (and these codes) were a tool to +get to the bulletin boards, on the boards themselves I began finding myself capturing, collecting +and saving on floppy disks all the information I could. Eventually, I had a lot of them indeed. +

+

+

+I've been asked at various times over the years why I started collecting these information files, +and I've hazed over various answers depending on the audience or the reason I was being asked. To be +honest, I'm still not sure, but perhaps the splitting of the family home, the lack of control as a +teenager in general, and the ability I was developing to read and sort information quickly all +combined into this instinct to collect, collect, collect. I would save everything I could to floppy +disks. If I didn't have a spare floppy disk, I'd turn on the printer and print out sheet after +form-fed sheet of the messages and writings of people. I would save up my money and buy more floppy +disks and trick cheaper single-sided floppy disks into using both sides, and off I'd go. I'd do it +for so long, that my father would wake up early in the morning and find his son hunched over the +computer, dawn light breaking into the computer room, and start screaming. (Luckily, his phone bill +didn't increase for all this use.) +

+The life I lived on the bulletin boards was full, rich, intellectual, and amazing. I met lifelong +friends, learned amazing things, and learned more about the world at large than the average teenager +of my time. I could recite area codes and where they were with ease. I'd hang out at the local mall +with people I'd met online. And when the time came, when I was ready, I started helping out with +a BBS in New Jersey as a co-sysop, an assistant administrator. This just whetted my appetite for the +ultimate goal - to run my own BBS. I knew what I'd call it: The Works. I even started labelling my +floppy disks with the name "The Works" to indicate where they'd one day end up. +

+ +This dream happened in 1986, when The Works BBS joined the online world. I needed to make my mark +and show how I was different from the now thousands-strong collection of BBSes out in the world, +so I declared myself a "textfile BBS", a place where programs wouldn't be allowed, only pure text +and writings. I used my collection of files from my years-saved floppies and offered my now-massive +archive to the world. +

+It was 5 megabytes. +

+

+

+ +My adventures of this time were many, and I wouldn't have traded my time with The Works for anything. +To talk about my own history with BBSes would fill a book - but the theme is clear: I had a +spectacular time, like a carnival and party everlasting, a sense of power and of happiness I've known +since then as one knows an old song. I'd do it all again, the delight, the tears, the discoveries, +the depressions. It was a part of what makes me what I am. It was who I was. It was my time with the +BBSes. +

+Naturally, it couldn't last forever. +

+See how the Internet changed me and everything else.... +

+ +

+
+
+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/textfiles.html b/textfiles.com/10/textfiles.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6e8a1bdc --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/10/textfiles.html @@ -0,0 +1,153 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +
+ + +
+ +INTRODUCTION 
+THE BBS YEARS 
+THE INTERNET 
+>TEXTFILES< 
+10 YEARS 
+ +		  + +
+ +TEXTFILES + +
+ +In which a Website is Born +

+Perhaps it seems strange considering how long ago this was, but to someone who'd come up through +BBSes and had spent five years watching the World Web Grow, it really felt like there wasn't anything +not on the Internet at that point. While archives were considered beyond belief if they measured in the +dozens of megabytes and search engines were the party of research projects and tech demos, I did feel +like everything was now online and I could find it. +

+I couldn't. +

+I couldn't find my old favorite BBS (Sherwood Forest II, 914-359-1517). I couldn't find any old text +files like the classics I'd considered BBS canon. In fact, I couldn't find much mention of BBSes as +a subject. I didn't find lists, or software, or any sort of hint that they'd ever been around anywhere +but in my own mind. It felt, to me, like they were lost, a part of history not lucky enough to be +around when the Internet hit its stride, and were going to be forgotten. That was a horrible thought. +

+(I must say, of course, that this would never have been the case; people would certainly have continued +to add computer history of all stripe to the Internet and time has borne out amazing collections of +computer and bulletin board system history for all to find. Work was being done before 1998 in this +area, but I, for all my belief in my abilities, could not find it. I felt alone, but was not, actually, +alone.) +

+

+

+At the time, registering domains that included nouns was a bit more trivial than the present day; I +decided a website that would collect some of these old textfiles I'd kept on floppies all these years, +from the days before The Works and post-dating the life of my own BBS. Because it was available, I +registered TEXTFILES.COM. In one of those strange bits of history that hindsight would have +benefitted, I also registered TEXTFILES.ORG but chose to let that one lapse, thinking it wouldn't +have much purpose. I do regret that choice. TEXTFILES.COM it was, and I set to work finding my old +collection of textfiles to put online. +

+

+

+Why green? Why long file directories? Why these strange classifications, this eclectic set of +categories? What's up with a blinking GIF? +

+ +Good questions, all. Not all of them I can answer with definition, of course, but good questions. +Green, of course, was trying to harken back to a time of green monitors and lack of color, an era +I experienced via Apple II computers at my various schools and at friend's homes. The monitors that +Apple used had a quality to them, a glowing and sharp green, that has always struck me as pleasant. +Why I continue to think of this as a useful interface to the present day is beyond me, other than +how it tells you, in one swift glance, that you are seeing something from history, a history that is +limited technology compared to what you are now used to. It can predate variable-length text. It +predates nearly unlimited columns on the screen. It definitely predates multi-user experiences that +we now consider mundane and the realm of the majority of computer entertainment. I feel it's a +signifier, and it stays. +

+The classifications and sometimes strange filenames are the products of a twelve year old. I came +up with my own classifying approach, out of my head, and that was what these files were placed +under. Over time, I allowed myself to think this was more effective than it was, and by the time +textfiles.com had come along, it seemed too much work to redo. So when a file's name ends in HUM +(humor) or PHK (Phreak), bear in mind that a very young upstart was behind them. +

+Advertising had not truly and completely infected the online experience, so I can't lay claim to +being ahead of my time or particularly principled in regards to access to the files. I simply +never liked banner ads when they were tacked onto the commercially-oriented sites and didn't have +an interest in adding them to my own site. I definitely didn't think much of Google Adsense when it +started providing text-based ads, even if I thought they had the potential to be less intrusive. I +guess it comes down to never wanting to make use of people as nickels and dimes, instead of just +letting them enjoy the place. +

+The site itself was (and is) a mass of directories, files by the hundred, selections and descriptions +written by myself over the course of months when I was in my late 20s. I began composing scripts +and tools to assist me in describing them, and so I continued for a long, long time. When the site +opened, the files numbered in the thousands, an amazing size for the time and all of it was right +there, ready to be found. I wanted the feeling that people had when they came to my site to be the +same when I logged onto a BBS at 12: a sense of wonder, of opportunity, of so much to know that I +could never know it all but would instead dive into and soak in what I could. I've been given some +indication over the years that for at least a few people I was successful. +

+

+

+The website started getting attention almost immediately - people were excited to have all these +old BBS artifacts so easily found online. I got interviewed in the press, was asked to speak at +the DEFCON security conference, and found myself in demand as a speaker. And then, as if this wasn't +enjoyable enough, people started contacting me about collections of textfiles they had been holding all +these years, and that they'd like to contribute to my archive. Thus began the process of collecting +at an even greater rate than I had before, and the journey I continue to this day. +

+ +I've been sent stacks of disks, CD-ROMs, even entire old computer systems. I've been mailed printouts, +advertisements, magazines, and hard drives. Folks who had been holding into this stuff for reasons they +couldn't quite explain had finally found someone who would respect and maintain their childhoods +and earlier lives. I started adding both these files (growing to tens of thousands of textfiles) and +began splitting off the site into even more subjects. First +web.textfiles.com (textfiles after 1995), then collections +like artscene.textfiles.com and +audio.textfiles.com. History wasn't just ASCII and textfiles, +after all: there were so many things to save, so much to keep. The site has grown exponentially, +upwards of hundreds of gigabytes. Hard drive technology is keeping ahead of it, but sometimes I +wonder if it's a race to see how much I can save versus how much I can store. +

+As many as a half-million people visit a textfiles.com site in a given month. They never meet me, may +not know I'm the person behind it, may not even know why this file is where it is. They probably never +used a BBS, and probably don't care. But they come to this site and they're happy to pull from it +what they need at that point in their life, and I'm happy to provide it. +

+While many might not be aware, a percentage are more than aware of the history of the BBS and they +kneel at the pool of files and just lose themselves in them, clicking from memory to touchpoint to +surprising new perspective. I know this because of the thousands of fan letters I've gotten; the thank +yous, the questions, the testimonials to this era of the BBS. +

+ +I've naturally moved between a lot of different hosting providers over the years. They include the +Thomson Corporation, Dream Communications, and currently TQ Hosting. I've also kept it in my own basement when times have gotten rough, and I can assure you, they've +sometimes gotten rough indeed. When 800 gigabytes of data is in one place, something on there will +insult or offend somebody, somewhere, somehow. It's all part of the game, and a decade hasn't killed +me or the site yet. +

+

+

+ +Probably the most radical change to my life was the bright idea in 2002 to capture even more of the +history of the BBS by doing a documentary. The +BBS Documentary was a four year project that is still +paying off, between friends made, things learned, and history saved. Hundreds of people were interviewed +and hundreds of hours filmed for it, and the resulting work has been downloaded or bought by thousands. +How could I have known how much would come of putting up my collection of textfiles back in 1998? +

+It has been a great life, so far. +

+A toast to 10 years .... +

+ +

+
+
+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/10/today.html b/textfiles.com/10/today.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cb55cf6d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/10/today.html @@ -0,0 +1,45 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +
+ + +
+ +INTRODUCTION 
+THE BBS YEARS 
+THE INTERNET 
+TEXTFILES 
+>10 YEARS< 
+ +		  + +
+ +10 YEARS + +
+ +In which a curator rests, but only for a moment, and looks ahead +

+So that's what ten years of running a website is like! Pretty cool, if you ask me. From my humble +days in the beginnings of the home computer revolution to standing in front of hundreds and talking +about this passion of mine, I've had a great time. The site is running well, the history is brought +to a new generation, and the generation that grew up with these files are living those days again. +

+I've had people write me and tell me that they started using the web in 2000 and that now, in 2008, +they find themselves inspired by my site to go into a field of study. The fact that I would have +something online for all of a person's computing life blows my mind. It's a point of pride, to be +this dependable thing, for so many, across all this time. It has been a privilege, it has been an +honor. +

+Thank you, every one of you. +

+Now, get back to browsing! +

+ +

+
+
+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/100.1 b/textfiles.com/100.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..aee73574 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/100.1 @@ -0,0 +1,128 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Jason Scott's Top 100 Textfiles

+

+It's perfectly understandable that someone finding textfiles.com for the first +time wouldn't be interested in sifting through thousands of textfiles to get an +idea of what the site is about. For this reason, I've selected a "best of" +collection of one hundred textfiles that I think capture the spirit of this site +and the unique culture that it attempts to preserve.

+While in many cases, there are slicker or longer examples of these files, I felt +that these specific examples best captured the genre they belonged to. I invite +you to browse through this section, read up, and if you find something that +intrigues you, to read more about it in the bulk of the site. +

+These files are arranged alphabetically, not in any order of importance. +

+ + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
914bbs.txt 3968
 914 Area Code BBS List, by Dan Gelman (January 15, 1984)
A snapshot of the typical BBSes you might find in an area code, in this case, mine. A good portion of the "General" boards you see listed were in fact Phreak or Pirate boards. Keeping an active account on all your local systems could be quite time-consuming.
  +
actung.hum 332
 Relaxen und watch das blinkenlights...
This sort of small, quaint humor file could be found lurking across many different kinds of BBSes and mainframes. Origin: Unknown, although it very likely could date back to the 60's or 70's.
  +
ad.txt 1664
 Call The Upside Down BBS!
A typical "Tag File" for a Bulletin Board System, in this case a classic Apple II with 64k of memory. To entice you over, the BBS offers you everything up to and including the two floppy disks located in the floppy drives. Besides being an interesting approach for a BBS ad, this short file also shows the variety of devices you could hook to an Apple II, including devices you could hook to other devices.
  +
adventur.txt 7758
 Adventure: Solving it in Easy Steps, by The Rom Raider and Doctor Digital
Don't read this file if you haven't played Crowther and Wood's original classic "Adventure"! This file is a solid example of a "Walk-through", where the goal was to present an easy, no-thinking solution to the classic thinking person's game: text adventures. While these games could present hours (or days or weeks) of fun trying to solve the puzzles and pitfalls, many people were content to just be given the answer and go through the game blindly, watching as every step they made was the exact right one. To a smaller degree, there was a constant one-upsmanship with Walkthroughs, where whoever could come out with the "solve" for a game the soonest after it was released (or even before) was the King of the Hill.
  +
angela.art 6656
 ASCII Art of "Angela"
A solid, classic example of an ASCII Nude, brimming with joy and text-based sexiness. Some of these were hand-drawn, while others used primitive digitizers and software that translated graphics to text to give surprisingly realistic photos when seen from a distance. Naturally, these files were a hot trade online.
  +
anonymit 34657
 The Joy of Handles, by Mahatma Kane Jeeves and David Lescohier
This series of articles attacks the issue of anonymity and handles from a completely different set of perspectives; that is, the protection of the writer from general harassment and investigation, and not necessarily that of promoting unwelcome or illegal ideas. An informative read.
  +
applemaf.hum 21388
 The Apple Mafia Story, as told to Red Ghost, 1986
This interesting insight into the comings and goings of the Apple piracy world of the early-mid 80's shows the battle between the older class of pirates and the new breed of "r0dentz" that has been waged for the last 20 years. This file also gives a history (and hardware list) of the Sherwood Forest BBSes, which were among my all-time favorite boards, and probably a pretty darn influential force in the world that textfiles.com presents.
  +
apples.txt 8960
 Typical Apple Piracy Message Base, circa 1984
This pristine capture of a 14-message apple "warez" message base shows a gamut of user types converging in one place to trade boasts, information, and programs. From Sherlock Apple's boast of "I have em all!!!!!!" to Creative Cracker and Key Master's BBS ads, you can see how these places became hotbeds of activity and information. Key master and I traded textfiles back then; I thought nothing of calling a BBS called "The 4th Reich".
  +
arttext.fun 4020
 The Art of Writing Textfiles, by The Bronze Rider
Bronze rider weighs in with his opinions on how to write proper textfiles, probably in response to some lack of quality in files up to that point. (This file is incomplete for the moment, but you'll get the idea.)
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b00g!.hum 6623
 B00g and the Art of Zen, by Anarchy Incorporated
This file started a weird "b00g" craze that perpetuated itself for a number of years across a lot of BBSes that I was on/involved in. Then again, Anarchy Inc. was one of those groups you could depend on for some really excellent writing no matter what the subject was about.
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balls.txt 2845
 Mouse Balls Available as a Field Replacement Unit
A classic example of a somewhat plausible file making the rounds for years and years. This likely-true file discussing how to wash the balls from Computer Mice took on a life of its own and still shows up occasionally. Surely a giggle, if not a guffaw.
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basicom4.phk 17717
 Bioc Agent's Telecommunications Series, Part IV
BIOC Agent 003 was one of those rare phone phreaks who could both assimilate information around him and present it in a well-written, forthright manner. Often, many of the phreaking textfiles of the time were poorly written, hastily formatted, and lacking in any perspective beyond how to break or get freebies from a computer or network. Bioc got a lot of attention with his clear writing and informative series "The Basics of Telecommunications", which appeared in the summer of 1984. This example from the series, part 4 (of 7) covered both the hierarchy and electronic network of the Bell Telephone System. Groundbreaking.
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basicom5.phk 18867
 Bioc Agent's Telecommunications Series, Part V
Another example of BIOC's writing in the Basics of Telecommunications Series, this section dealt entirely with the basic telephone, including the wiring and the electronic aspects. Notably, BIOC gives a bibliography where he got a lot of his information (something pretty much not done beforehand) and additionally covers the theory of operation of the infamous "Black Box", as well. Excellent.
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bbsdeath.pro 7639
 Whatever Happened to REAL Bulletin-Board Systems?
What strikes me about this file was that it was written around 1982 and decries how out-of-touch, vicious, and impersonal the BBS world has grown for the writer. Note the interesting reasons he gives for the downturn of BBS's.
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bc760mod.ham 1408
 Modification of the Uniden Bearcat BC950XLT for Cellular Frequencies, by John Stover (March 29, 1988)
The problem was major: Cellular phones could be listened to by any ham radio scanner being made. The normal solution: Produce better cell phones, that did a better job of encrypting/scrambling transmissions. The solution the government took: Force all creators of any ham radio scanners to remove the capability of ham radios to listen to the frequencies chosen for the cellular phones. Naturally, the companies did this in the cheapest way possible, often just running a short-circuiting wire such that attempts to go to those frequencies would be unsuccessful. And naturally, files such as this one made themselves available, where you were told how to take out that wire and restore the machine to full functionality. Was the point to listen in on people? No. The point was crippling technology to hide things from people flies in the face of the spirit of technology. 5 short lines, and the efforts from the unknowing are thwarted. The power of textfiles.
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beefstar.hum 2965
 "Hey how much for someone to, you know, screw with the beef?"
This is the only beef pornography I've ever seen. Sexual Surrealism at its best.
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bhbb1.hac 9837
 Better Homes and Blue Boxing, Part I, by Mark Tabas (January 7, 1985)
Mark Tabas came along in 1985 and wrote a series of chatty, friendly files about all the fun you could have with the mysterious Blue Box, the most famous of all the Phreak Boxes that rose out of the 1970's and 1980's. This box, when used in conjunction with a 2600hz tone across a phone line, allowed you to seize control a telephone line as if you were an operator and do all sorts of neat, crazy stuff. By 1985 these boxes were becoming obsolete (with the advent of Electronic Switching System, or ESS) but this file harkens back to this interesting era. A sign of the great works LOD would create for the next decade.
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billrights.fun 3746
 The Bill of Rights "Lite", by John Perry Barlow
This re-tooled Bill of Rights, rephrased to reflect most of the constitutional issues arising in cyberspace and in general everyday life, hit the nail on the head as to how far the government had strayed from its original plan. Barlow, a co-founder of the Electronic Freedom Foundation, makes his beliefs about the modern world known in just a couple screenfuls of slashed-up constitutional law.
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black.box 4460
 To All Who Dare -- The Black Box
For many people, this simple little text file was the opening door into the world of the Phone Phreak, a world where a simple application of technology meant a subversion of the great and powerful Bell System. In this case, the Black Box would convince the telephone company that your phone was still ringing, even though you'd picked the phone up and were chatting happily through the buzzing rings. With its name owing to the 1970's era "Blue Box", the Black Box was the final spark to ignite a stream of steady "box" files, each one a more flamboyant and wild color and each promising the world.
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bofh.1 3854
 The Bastard Operator From Hell #1, by Simon Travaglia
As the BBS kids of the world grew into full-fledged System Operators, they found that no textfile out there caught the frustrations and issues of a computer hacker saddled with responsibility more than the BOFH (Bastard Operator from Hell) series. Stretching through many files and continuing to this day as a magazine column, these textfiles set out an alternate-world Simon the Sysadmin who would torture and ruin his users in the pursuit of more free time and lager. The initials BOFH have become one of the better-kept inside jokes of the System Admin trade, and these files have become immortal.
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cDc-0200.txt 124155
 The cDc #200 Higgledy-Piggledy-Big-Fat-Henacious-Mega-Mackadocious You-Can't-Even-Come-Close-So-Jump-Back-K-BOOMIDY-BOOMIDY-BOOM File, by Swamp Ratte'
The Cult of the Dead Cow continues to be a prominent force in the online world, but when they started in the late 1980's they were just another text-file writing group, copying heavy metal lyrics and printing bomb ingredient lists. Swamp Ratte's perseverance and leadership caused cDc to break out of that mode, however, and by the time they'd released their 200th textfile (In December of 1992) they'd been around for over 6 years, forever by BBS standards. To celebrate, Swamp Ratte' wrote this file, which I consider to be an all-time classic not only because of the dead-on parodies of the BBS world of the 1980's that run through it, but for the way these parodies perfectly capture a lot of the cultural forces that ran through that time. (The warez vs. textfiles debate, the self-aggrandizement of older hackers, the completely bizzare spelling styles, etc.) This file truly goes above and beyond in every way. A great reference file to see if you can get all the jokes when reading other files here.
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captain.phk 2759
 An Apple for the Captain, by Steven Wozniak (October 1, 1984)
BIOC Agent 003 transcribes an Infoworld article that mentions a funny story about Captain Crunch (John Draper), an employee of Apple, reprogramming an Apple II so that it would dial up PBX lines to get free phone codes. In a few short paragraphs, Steven Wozniak describes Phone Phreaking with an innocent sense of fun and exploration, using common technology.
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captmidn.txt 24394
 The Story of Captain Midnight
This textfile, source unknown, tells the story of Captain Midnight, a lone satellite operator who overrode HBO's signal with a warning against charging $12.95 a month and scrambling their signal. This sudden seizure of the HBO signal caught the media (and the government)'s attention, and he was soon caught. This textfile saves the memory of a fellow who took matters into his own hands, and blew out a showing of Pee Wee's Big Adventure as a bonus.
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catstuff.app 9818
 Expanding Your Apple Cat II, by The Ware-Wolf
The Novation Apple Cat Modem was one of those pieces of technology that you just can't believe ever got out into the market, and which stands as a straight example of the creativity that lives in this world. Built simply to be a flexible modem, this piece of technology contained 4 digital to analogue converters and several other unexpected ports and switches that caused it to be used as a clock, answering machine/voice mailbox, hold button, voice changer, and music player. Simply put, this modem was beyond belief. This textfile helps show some of the amazing modifications to this modem that were devised by its users.
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codegeek.txt 20841
 Robert Hayden's Code of the Geeks v1.01
The Geek Code is one of those bizzare Internet-only phenomenons that would only rise up among a culture dominated by the intelligensia: a code that, through an application of letters with plus or minus modifications, would indicate the hobbies, desires, or public aspects of that person, easily machine-readable, but to anyone who didn't know the code, completely indecipherable.
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copyprot.pro 11392
 Copy Protection: A History and Outlook
Dt writes a quick overview (intended for publication, and therefore a little more balanced than it normally would have been) about the history of copy protection and some of the methods used on both sides in the war over software.
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crossbow 29200
 From Crossbows to Cryptography: Thwarting the State Via Technology
Chuck Hammill of the Libertech Project comes out with a jaw-dropping defense of technology as a liberating force, through the use of cryptography and communication, and applies it to his (cynical) view of history and the nature of Governments. A speech given at the Future of Freedom Conference that is at once balanced, intruiging, revolutionary, bitter, hopeful, and inspiring. All around, ahead of its time and relevant to this very minute.
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dec.wars 31839
 DEC WARS: The Continuing Saga of the Adventures of Luke Vaxhacker
One of the earlier and one of the best cross-cultural fan fiction files, combining the world of Digital's VAX series of computers with the Star Wars movies. Peppered throughout this file, tons of inside VAX jokes combine with Star Wars references, making it one of the geekiest, nerdiest files you could come across online. This genre has exploded out of control since then, but at the time, it was something really new, and a ton of fun.
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diskgone.ana 627
 When He Boots It, It Boots Him! From Ziggy Stardust
This explosive device sticks in the mind because of both the pure nastiness of the situation (booby trapping a floppy disk to turn it into a bomb) and the reason given for a person to risk someone else's life: they didn't trade pirated programs honestly.
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dodontae.hum 9385
 The Do's and Don'ts of Ascii Express, by Quasimoto
The story of Ascii Express is one of a telecommunications company adding a small feature to allow remote downloads, that spread into a massive underground network of pirated applications throughout the Apple II community. These "AE Lines" provided quick, simple access to other floppy drives across the country, and became a subculture all their own. This file purports to give some suggested etiquette for AE lines, only to be deflated quite humorously by Count Nibble at the end.
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easymony.ana 6709
 A Guide to Easy Money, by The Flash (January 4, 1986)
Even a cursory read of this file shows that the Flash knew not one molecule of what he was talking about. This complete lack of knowledge in the dark arts of Street Economy obviously didn't stop him from publishing a series of files on how to succeed in them. At this no-man's land between fact and fantasy, you get a great insight into the author's idea of how the world works, and how easy he thought the world of crime was. (Ostensibly, the Flash has gone on to a nice, quiet life somewhere.)
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eatingmsh.drg 2028
 Can You Put Psychedelic Mushrooms on Pizza?
A pretty funny example from a Usenet posting in alt.drugs. Somehow, I can imagine this happening. And oh, he's the MANAGER! While a lot of drug files tend to be boring chemical lists or long and drawn-out philosophical discussions, this file makes you think twice about who's working the cash register.
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eel_bye.txt 7680
 The Eel Says Goodbye to the Pirate World
What really strikes me about The Eel's farewell to the piracy world of 1992 is that while he says that one of his primary motivations for leaving is his current circle of "real" friends, the rest of the file goes to show he has dozens of other "real" friends as well. No doubt in the years after his break away from life on the modem he's built even more circles of friends, but one can't help wondering if he doesn't read this file and think of what else he threw away besides his collection of "warez".
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elite.cmd 5946
 The Elite Commandments
As the word "Elite" came to be bandied about in BBSes, people started to separate themselves between the "Elite" and "Unelite". Specifically, this was just another way to look down on others based on completely arbitrary, meaningless reasons. This file skewers that attitude in a list of "commandments" that best represent the mindset of the self-named "elite". As a bonus, several inside jokes from the era are presented in a "gossip weekly" parody at the end.
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elites.txt 3113
 Someone Completely Blows Up
A young BBS user (I don't know where this came from) suddenly begins ranting about everything that bothers him about being on BBSes. His complaints take on a heartwarming quirkiness, looking back.
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ethics.txt 8140
 Ethics for BBS Users
A well-written, nicely-formatted, completely pedantic file that lectures you on every aspect of being a BBS user. This file was part of a trend of Sysops explaining to users how great they had it for having BBSes to call, and to appreciate the work behind them. They were rarely successful, but you do what you can. The invitation to download the file and display it on other BBSes meant that some new users would be subjected to this file automatically. The "wearing a tie to school" side of the BBS world.
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famous.bug 52609
 Famous Computer Bugs, compiled by Dave Curry and John Shore
This ARPAnet-compiled lists of computer glitches through history shows some wonderful perspective on disasters and screw-ups through history (mostly the 60's and 70's) and shows you the interesting vulnerabilities that have cropped up over time. Some of them, such as a probe suddenly losing contact with earth, are scarily sobering, but others, such as the Multics bug (the swapper-out process would swap out the swapper-in process!) make you just want to snort, assuming you snort at that sort of thing. Geeky, and cute.
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feh-1 54625
 Fuckin' Eleet Haxor Issue #1, July 1st 1995
As the World Wide Web really started to take hold in the middle of the 1990s, textfiles became a rarer and rarer entity, usually leaning instead to HTML pages and graphics to get the information (and the point) across. In the case of FEH, indicative of the textfiles of the time, it is sometimes very hard to tell where the parody and where the seriousness lay within the issue. While a lot of it seems to be a thought-out send-up of the badly-spelling hacking community, some serious and researched information is included as well. This magazine went on to several additional issues, each of them a little more serious than the last. For better or worse, this is how things came to be in the culture.
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gems.txt 75172
 GEMS: The Untold Story, by the Video Vindicator (February 1, 1992)
The Video Vindicator came late into the game (early 1990's) but produced some of the most wonderful files from that time period. This file caught my attention because he chose a subject that would normally be of very little interest to the BBS crowd (Gemology) and takes it to a completely new level by turning it into both a wonderful history lesson about Gems (I learned a lot in this file) and twisting it into yet another way to scam the planet for some extra bucks. Breathtaking in his audacity, and completely slick in his delivery. One to watch.
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groupass.phk 1809
 An Unforgettable Telephone Service Call, from Pat Routledge
This breed of textfile tends to be short, amusing, and perpetuated endlessly. Often the story is hard to track back, and is even more often a paraphrase of what actually happened, but it never fails to be humorous, especially if it lasted this far. A classic "urban legend", even if it's true.
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hack1.hac 7960
 The Basics of Hacking: Introduction, by The Knights of Shadow
The Knights of Shadow produced a collection of Hacking How-Tos that instructed users how to get around a variety of mainframes, including Digital and Data General Machines. While the information in these texts might not be as relevant, this introduction stands apart for its preaching the idea of hacking for knowledge, and leaving no footprints and destroying nothing in the process. Their definition of "Hacker" is rather interesting, as well. A clever set of files.
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hack11a.txt 692945
 The Project Gutenberg E-Text of Bruce Sterling's Hacker Crackdown
In 1993, Science Fiction author Bruce Sterling aimed his considerable writing talents to dissecting and understanding all the forces at work between Hackers, Police, and the people they've had an effect on. He does a very admirable job. While no book (so far) has captured the 1980's computer hacker experience perfectly, this book makes you come away with a feeling that the major issues were touched on and that no-one (on either side) got the short shaft. (This is a major accomplishment in itself.) Sterling is an excellent writer, and while compared to other works in this directory this textfile is a bit on the mammoth side, it's worth it. This file also highlights the work of the great Project Gutenberg, which for 20 years has endeavored to transcribe as many classic works to electronic texts as their staff of volunteers will let them. There's an entire directory of these important and breathtakingly huge projects on textfiles.
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hack7.txt 3988
 The Conscience of a Hacker, by The Mentor (January 8, 1986)
The Mentor's angry scream against the authorities he saw as trying to crush his spark and the spark of people like him. For some reason, this file became the flashpoint that a number of books (including Bruce Sterling's) used as an example of the oppression of the intelligent and the motivations behind the fine art of hacking. Whether it stands up to this sort of light or not, it's a clear statement from someone who feels a lot of pain; and that's what communication is all about.
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hack_ths.txt 148109
 The Social Organization of the Computer Underground, The Thesis of Gordon Meyer
Mr. (Probably Dr.) Meyer's Sociology paper on the social structure in Hacking, Phreaking, and Pirating groups is interestingly dedicated to George Hayduke (writer of the "Get Even" series of revenge books) and Barry Freed (The pseudonym taken by Abbie Hoffman when he was a fugitive from the FBI). This indicates not a little leaning on the side of the groups he's analyzing. He goes over impressions that the media have about hackers, what being a hacker, phreak or pirate consists of as he sees it, and then tries to draw conclusions of what this all means. Written in 1989, this file takes on the subculture with a non-hysterical point of view that makes it very easy to read. Worth the time.
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highdoc.ana 1408
 How to get Really Soaring High on Gatorade, by Max Madd
Some of the most entertaining textfiles are the ones where the writer is obviously hot to write one, but has no actual information to report on. Instead, they pull up a in-the-rough concept, like getting high off a fruit drink, and create a short file around it. In this case, the key is to get high off the thirst-quenching Gatorade, by merely drinking it as fast as possible. Nearly a third of the entire file is a legal disclaimer, a typical gesture that is very likely meaningless in the long run.
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howtobbs.txt 9216
 How to Become an Unsuccessful, Burned-Out SysOp
From the perspective of 24-hour, super-high-speed internet connections, it's refreshing to read this list of tips telling people how they can improve their single-line, often 2400 baud BBS lines. The hundreds of bulletin boards popping up every month during the early 80's ensured that general guideline files actually had a large target audience. Of course, the comment about free software being inherently bad doesn't seem as relevant anymore...
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iaad.txt 71551
 How Pirate BBSes Impact on the Entire Atari Community, by D.A. Brumleve
This serious report, tracking the theoretical impact of piracy on the Atari ST publishing community, has an unintended secondary effect of documenting and providing an excellent picture of the typical "Pirate" BBS in the early 90's. Besides capturing interesting quotes and entire file directories, this report gives a solid overview of this underanalyzed social phenomenon. Interesting reading, if a bit heavy-handed in some places.
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icegun.ana 11253
 A Step by Step Guide to Making a Dry Ice Gun by The Voice Over
Please don't follow the instructions in this file; I can't vouch for its truthfulness or safety. This file is a typical weaponry/anarchy file, inviting you to build some dangerous thing for the purposes of destruction or entertainment. Unlike many such files, The Voice Over can spell, and he warns you how much you can injure yourself. These files comprise a massive subset of the textfiles of the 1980's; why people dedicate such effort to proving they can blow up more than anyone else is an interesting outcropping of the one-upmanship prevalent in other parts of the culture. An unusually academic file from Metal Communications.
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infobugs.adv 3930
 A Collection of Infocom Bugs, from the New Zork Times
I'm not entirely sure this file comes from the New Zork Times, but the "we" tense of the description of the bugs and the invitation to try new things on the end smacks of it. Infocom was a text adventure game company - by pretty much any measure, the best. They had some of the most evocative games to come out at the time, and few game companies today even come close to the experiences that Infocom provided. Because the games were so detailed, the types of bugs that people would encounter were strange indeed, and this file chronicles some of them. Neat.
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intohell.hum 11233
 Hacking Into Hell, by The Raver
The Raver serves up a very odd blend of heavy-metal/satanic imagery, geek humor, and suspense in this story of a hapless user hacking into Lucifer's Mainframe. The Metal AE, where this file originated from, was host to a whole gang of Heavy Metal blasting computer geeks, and that weird matchup shows in nearly every textfile that came out of them. An evocative file, to say the least.
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intro.hum 5827
 The Utopia BBS Login Screen: "Pansy's Homemade Mainframe"
The first of two login screens from the Utopia BBS on this top 100 list. The Utopia BBS was one of hundreds of Apple II GBBS boards out there, written in BASIC and therefore completely modifiable (the additions were called 'mods') by the Sysop or Co-Sysops. In the case of this particular board, you could log on each day and see a completely different board, with different menus, login screens, and the rest. This time, they make you type your password in several times, only to show they were completely kidding with you. The long message about whether to create a Utopia II and the odd logoff screen (after I was ejected for not being "validated" yet) only add to the fun.
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jihad.nfo 17260
 The JiHAD Courier Information File
This particular file doesn't hold any particular historical significance; I pretty much chose it at random because it was a good example of a Tag file, and one of a Courier Group at that. Tag files are little pieces of text usually attached to a pirated piece of software, that tells you information about the group that cracked file, or what kind of program you'd gotten, or even whatever news had gone on it that group recently. Courier groups were an interesting phenomenon of the past decade, where the process of cracking software and distributing it separated and separate groups formed for each function. Crackers could then merely send a program to the contact for the Courier group, and the file would be spread along to the "usual channels" within a day or two. Interesting scene.
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k-k00ld.hum 5158
 The History of Real K-K00L D00DS, by The Edge
While the still-common habit of bad spelling (replacing U for You, 0 for O, Z for S, and similar gunk) in communication might seem a somewhat new fad, in fact it goes back for over a decade. In this file (circa 1985), you can already see that it's been around long enough to be made fun of in a parody text. The Edge engages in a pretty amusing sample "chat" session in the middle of the file, that really makes me laugh, because I really did get users like that. And people think talking like this is still cutting edge?
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killsant.hum 3497
 How to Kill Santa Claus Dead! by the Outland
The Outland (of the Neon Knights) ran the first board I was ever a Sysop of, Milliways. You would never know it if you met him, but when the Outland sat down to write files for Metal Communications and the Neon Knights, he would just spew forth some of the most violent, anarchistic, nihilist text to come out of any file-writing group. Besides Santa Claus, other targets of his files included the Easter Bunny, mailboxes, the local neighborhood, and in one case, I recall, the entire planet. He was certainly in character with the other members of the Neon Knights, where violence was the main driving force in the writing, but knowing him personally gave me insight that for him, it was actually just all fiction, another neat thing to do.
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killshco.ana 16886
 The SchoolStoppers' Textbook
The Yippies, or "Youth International Party" were a political group from the late 60's and early seventies that were really the grandfathers of a lot of the computer "underground" that flourishes today. They staged protests, wrote interesting books and articles, and published the Youth International Party Line (YIPL) which later became TAP, a predecessor of the currently famous 2600 magazine. Among their famous members were Abbie Hoffman and Jerry Rubin. This reprinted article is essentially a checklist for causing utter anarchy at your local school, so as to completely disrupt the learning process. Angry but witty, this was where a lot of later "anarchy" files took their style from, knowing it or not.
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krckwczt.app 137510
 Kracowicz' Kracking Korner: The Basics of Kracking Parts 1-9
The world of Apple II Copy Protection was a hot battlefield throughout the Apple II's production life, with commercial developers spending thousands on new copy protection schemes and crackers rising out of the woodwork to "crack" these programs, make them copyable, and distribute them. With Krakowicz, you had a Software Company's worst nightmare: A literate, intelligent crackist who made a supreme effort to teach others. What is most striking about this series of files is not just the amount of detail and research that Kracowicz put into his writing to make it understandable to others, but his unique hardware-based solutions to the software that was being piped through his Apple II. By creating boards, switches, and hot-wiring his chips, he could exert incredible control over the programs he was attempting to crack. The companies didn't have a chance. Kracowicz stands alone.
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lay-girl.txt 16308
 The Complete Guide of Laying a Girl v1.1, from John Smith
Probably the most amusing textfiles I occasionally stumbled across were those attempting to teach you the birds and the bees, or at least how to get laid. Usually in the form of "how-to" guides, these textfiles were usually completely out of left field, totally lacking in any accuracy or truly helpful information, and more likely than not someone's complete fantasy from watching too many teen exploitation flicks. In the case of this particular specimen, Mr. Smith seems to have as weak a grasp on the English language as he does on the particulars of intercourse or romance. Such stunning phrases as "Stack you hand gently under her trousers and move your hand more deeply evert time" guarantee that you're going to take this file with an oven-sized grain of salt. Sadly, this file is among the best of the bunch -- many of the others indicated rape or kidnapping as appropriate means to seduction. A fountain of ignorance.
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leeches!.hum 11312
 The Society of "Leeches" in the Telecommunications World, by Mister I/O
"Mister I/O" was the first name of The Outland, who later went on to join the Neon Knights and Metal Communications. In this file, he skewers the world of "Leeches", users who connect to systems and take all the files without donating any of their own. This particular kind of file (ridiculing other groups within the subculture) were plentiful by this time, but I think his stands out for that completely bizzare chart of the lineage of Leeches. Additionally, he even throws in some mathematical equations to determine your "leechiness". This file was written before his files took on a much more violent (but still witty) turn, as mentioned previously.
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lod-1 213571
 The Legion of Doom/Hacking Technical Journal Volume 1, by the LOD
I can remember when the Legion of Doom was just one of a group of punk kids hanging around on some of the same BBSes that I frequented. But someone or several someones within the group threw a ton of energy into the LOD, and they quickly rose to the forefront of Hacker/Phreaking groups of the time. The advantage of years of hindsight and a number of books have brought the group much more fame and regard historically, but even the most cynical or skeptical observer had to admit; this group produced. A prime example are these Legion of Doom/Hacker Technical journals, an indirect response to Phrack and other hacker magazines. The LOD/H Tech Journal was heavy, meaty stuff for the time (1987) with schematics, statistics, and even attributions to the files that had come before it. The series is worth reading as a prime example of the "highbrow" hackers, who put on the airs of having the knowledge to share, while raising the ire of those who didn't.
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lozers.hum 24778
 The Official 1984 Lozerlist, by The Atom (March 3, 1985)
The Atom's bile-spewing, gossip-heavy "Loser List" comes in as one of the best examples of an all-around "Rag File" that I've seen, where the writer takes everyone on and attempts to completely slam them into the ground on all sides. Personal info, analysis of the groups they belong to, rumors and innuendo are all up for grabs as he decimates a lot of the "big names" in the 914/212/718 BBS world (as well as a few from the midwest). It appears a lot of his hatred comes from the Richard Sandza articles (also in the top 100), but more than that, he has it in for nearly anyone who has become in some way "famous" or "legendary" in the Phreak and Piracy world. Quite a piece of work. I never found a 1985 list or anything since.
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ludeinfo.hum 9298
 Basic, Intermediate and Advanced Luding, by Sinbad Sailor
While calling an interesting BBS called the 1985 BBS (the last four digits were 1985, it came up on January 1st of 1985 and went down December 31st, 1985), I stumbled upon this small social phenomenon called "Luding". The board was reeking with it; there was a Luding sub-board filled with messages and there were a good number of instructional "Luding" files, not to mention some Luding poetry and fiction. Naturally, this really threw me for a loop, and while the actual idea of "Luding" is somewhat tame, these set of files stand out to me as excellent examples of how just writing about a small little fad in your hometown could blow the entire thing out of proportion to the point that you thought you were really missing out on something big.
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mathimp.txt 4177
 Impure Mathematics: The Story of Polly Nomial
What we have here is probably the all-time marathon-running Usenet humor file. A collection of mathematic inside jokes used to tell a running set of sexual innuendo, this story of the hapless Polly Nomial and Curly Pi was the kind of file you'd trip over time and time again in different file directories. There are a good amount of sequels, but you can't beat the original. Math Geek humor; what beats that?
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miami.hum 8107
 Go Bare, by Captain Goodnight (August 25, 1986)
Captain Goodnight's fictional short story is worth reading for the somewhat accurate feeling it gives of living a life primarily through a computer. There's some bad spelling and weird images mixed into the paragraphs, but on the whole, you'll come away from it either remembering memories from your own childhood or feel like you're peering into someone's life. A real gas of a story.
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mindvox 66115
 Voices in My Head: The Mindvox Overture by Patrick Kroupa
Mr. Kroupa's announcement of the creation of his new ISP caught a lot of people off guard. The tack from which he made his announcement was to harken back to the 1980's, and all the unique cultural forces at work then, that expressed themselves on the modem. In many ways, he saw a lot of what I've seen in terms of a need to preserve or maintain that time in some fashion. He additionally saw a need to make those times come back by creating Mindvox, his ISP by way of his company Phantom Technologies. I know that mindvox was wildly successful for a time, but the full story of its downfall escapes me. Meanwhile, this text still survives and shows an amazing breadth of insight into the BBS world of the preceding decade. This document was reprinted everywhere, so it definitely hit a nerve. I just wish we had a little more in our hands to show for it.
  +
modemlif.hac 11074
 The Modem Life: Is it Worth it? By Bryan Nomad (May 26, 1985) [?]
Bryan, frustrated by downed BBSes, busy signals, abuse and hatred in message bases, and the financial drain of being s SysOp, takes a different tack. He writes this heartfelt message to the BBS world at large to ask people to remember that they're all people, they're all part of a community, and it's not about how much abuse you can spew into the air, but about getting to know one another and maybe make some friends. How effective is this file at getting into a cynical heart? Who knows. One can always hope it did some good. Thank you, Bryan.
  +
nighhack.omn 9225
 The Night of the Hackers, by Richard Sandza, transcribed by The Reflex
There are two notable angles to this file. The more simpler one is that it was transcribed by The Reflex of Omnipotent Incorporated, a regular on The Works BBS and an all-around prolific and intelligent writer. He chose as an important addition to his body of work this article from Newsweek, published in 1984. The second angle is this article, "Night of the Hackers", which brought right to the forefront a lot of those mysterious terms that hung in the air as private knowledge and secrets for only those "in the know" in the BBS world. Sherwood Forest, Blottoland, Plovernet, tele-trials all got (unwanted) national exposure in this article, and things just weren't the same afterwards. The aftermath of Richard Sandza's life is documented in "Revenge of the Hackers", also in this collection. Studied with the span of years from it, the article is solid, interesting, and pretty accurate.
  +
noise.ana 3679
 Variable-Pitched Frequency Generator, or How to Annoy Your Teachers, by Captain Quieg
The Captain provides you with an accurate (I had one built), inexpensive, and mostly harmless prank electronic toy that would emit an extremely high-pitched noise, such that many people could get headaches from prolonged exposure. Not exactly a gentle diversion, but unforgettable. While this particular diagram worked, it was a relatively rare thing to come away from an electronics document and have everything function as claimed. Educational.
  +
paging_g.ame 4275
 The Paging Game, by Jeff Berryman
Trying to explain this one to anyone who doesn't know the concept of "memory paging" is a little bit of a losing battle. Essentially, a machine with memory that pages will throw out unused parts of programs or files onto a disk drive, ready to bring it back if you really use it. If you think MY explanation's a little choppy, wait'll you real THIS file. A golden piece of work from 1981.
  +
peat.hum 532
 The Peat Moss Incident
The best size-reaction ratio of the textfiles collection. Surreal.
  +
pezrambl.oct 20975
 Mr. Pez's Rambling About Textfiles and Leeching, by Mr. Pez (March 13, 1987)
Mr. Pez was another Works regular, always there with a quick wit and a really snooty attitude. Besides being on The Works, he also graced several other 914 boards and The Dark Side of the Moon (408) with his acidic attitude. In this file, he decided to just turn on his word processor and talk about whatever for as long as he could. To our advantage, the subject he chooses is Textfiles, which gives us insight into the type of world a teenager lived through in 1987 BBS terms. Most amusingly to me, he recounts the time I sat there copying all my textfile collection onto his hard drive trying to convince me to have his guitar and some cash. (The attempt was unsuccessful, and Donna married some other guy.) A personal trip down memory lane, but relevant to get some insight into where my editorial bent is as well.
  +
phrack.01.phk 29195
 Phrack Magazine Volume One, Issue One, edited by Taran King (November 17, 1985)
The Phreaking/Hacking magazine that changed everything. While other electronic magazines existed before Phrack, none took the voice of the underground and presented itself as such a dominating, matter-of-fact entity as the Phracks have. Through the years, Phrack has always been dependable as a solidly-written, interest-gathering, packed-with-talent compilation of hot topics going throughout the Hacker Underground as most people have come to understand it. Electronic zines as a general force were usually created so that individual writers' work wouldn't get lost in the wash of sites; by hooking up with a dozen other articles, relatively monstrous 50k-100k files could stand out from the endless grouping of 2k and 15k files that others were putting out. It worked.. very few people don't remember Phrack in some fashion if they were involved in BBSes in the late 80's. This brings us to the other example issue...
  +
phrack.29.phk 235777
 Phrack Magazine 4th Anniversary Issue, Volume Three, Issue 29 (November 17, 1989)
By the fourth year of publication, Phrack is an institution. The issue opens with a profile of Emmanuel Goldstein, the enigmatic and steadfast editor of 2600 Magazine (which has gone on to become a major institution itself) and progressing into deeply technological discussions involving money transfer and Internet protocols. By this time the Phrack World News, an overview of the social and legal scene around the culture had become a staple of the issues. Unstoppable.
  +
pokelist.app 19769
 The Wizard's Call, Peek and Poke list for the Apple ][ (May 1984)
Part of the immense charm of the Apple II series of computers was how they would encourage their users to learn everything they could about the system, to reprogram, modify, hardwire, and otherwise mess with all aspects of the machines. What this meant was that people were getting a knowledge of the Apples that could far outstrip almost all the other personal computers of the time. Evidence of the depth of this knowledge shows in files like this one, where a good portion of the total memory locations have been mapped and all sorts of neat features make themselves known. By the end run of the Apple II's main life (late 80's) this machine could accomplish a breathtaking amount of tasks. Geeky, but a lot of fun.
  +
purity.txt 58845
 The Unisex, Omnisexual Purity Test v4.00 (April 23, 1988)
One of the interesting things that arose out of the ARPAnet and Internet was the way that an unbelievable amount of energy could be focused on a single project, causing it to turn into a Wonder Of The World in a very short period of time. In the case of this file, the goal became to determine a person's "purity" by creating a list of questionable non-innocent acts that they could perform in life, and whatever percentage they had not yet done, was their purity. Of course, after dozens of entries into this document, it's become this complete other world, with every degrading, exciting, bizzare thing that someone could do with someone else (or themselves, or a group of people, or food) is listed. There are actually divergent, unrelated versions of this idea up on this site, but I chose this file because it lists out a great pedigree that goes back to 1982, and it's particularly well-written. Head-swimmingly sick.
  +
real.pgmrs 23955
 Real Programmers Don't Use Pascal
One of the most interesting fads to hit the online world were the "Real" files. Based loosely on the pop culture book "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche", these files presented a framework where others could just list their idea of what a "real" hacker or golfer or restaurant or whatever. It's an addictive way to describe things, and this explains the dozens and dozens of "real" files that pervaded BBSes throughout the decade. In the case of the "Real Programmers" file, the writing style of the author is particularly well-crafted (although I can't really judge the accuracy of his assertions) and it therefore has a very large distribution. Geeky humor.
  +
realpez.oct 16384
 Real PEZ Devotees, by Mr. Pez
The Works BBS's own Mr. Pez makes his own contribution to the "Real" files canon with this file about the followers of his BBS, "Pez Devotees". In the case of this file, the combination of his mention of all the different things he personally liked (including clothes, bands, sports and writing style) combined with his edging into nearly all aspects of a person's life to provide guidelines to be one of his devotees, makes this one of my favorite files. It should be noted that this file is a derivative of the original, the "Real Pirate's Guide", below.
  +
realpira.hum 6529
 The Real Pirate's Guide by Rabid Rasta [?]
Seizing the opportunity to make a humor file based on the now-popular "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche" idea, Rabid Rasta made what is generally agreed upon to be the first of the BBS world's "Real" files, files which explain what the difference between "Real" and "Fake" was. In the case of his file, he puts down what makes a "Real" pirate, including assertions about computer and modem speed, writing style, and spelling. With the exception of "The Real Programmer's Guide" (which shows up a little earlier than this file, although only on ARPAnet and not on the BBS/AE world), this file seems to have been the one that started it all. The observations he makes are both humorous, and insightful into where the world was in 1984 if you were living your life through a modem.
  +
revhack.omn 6266
 Revenge of the Hackers, by Richard Sandza, Transcribed by The Reflex
The writer of "Night of the Hackers" for Newsweek revealed in this followup article that his life became quite a living hell for him after the original article was published. His credit cards were hacked, phone calls came 24 hours a day, and, to a lesser relevance, he went on "tele-trial". Tele-trial appears to mean that he had a message base fill up with messages about him. Either way, his article shows the kind of full-on attack that the hacker community was capable of pulling off at the time, completely unorganized and out for blood. The Reflex, as always, does an impeccable transcription job.
  +
revolt.dj 2358
 Dick and Jane Instigate a Popular Revolution, by The Deth Vegetable and Iskra
Deth Vegetable and Iskra were both co-sysops of The Works way back when, before they both joined the Cult of the Dead Cow and moved on to greener pastures. (Actually, Iskra then came back and became the SysOp of the most recent incarnations of the Works, so it's all kind of circular in a way.) In any event, they got their heads together in the early 1990's and wrote this file, a parody of the "Dick and Jane" books that my generation lightly heard of. Short, sweet, and funny. Oh, and political.
  +
safeinfo.fun 2176
 The Safehouse Blueprints, from the Safehouse BBS
The Safehouse BBS was one of the mid-80's "Super" BBSes that were pushing not only that they were the places to be, but that the technology and pure computing power at their disposal made them inherently irresistible. Now, looking back over the years with a more solid technical knowledge, some of the claims in this BBS information file are questionable (It's a modular program? What does that matter!) But you can see an example of how technology presented its own inherent sexiness to the BBS user.
  +
sexsatan.hum 8979
 Sex with Satan, by Psychoe
Ah, where do you begin with "Sex with Satan". Psychoe's tale of murder, sexual mayhem, the Lord of Darkness and overactive babysitters never fails to floor me with its perfect blend of comic rant and erotic literature. You come away from reading it completely dazed and unsure what you just read. While you begin to read the file thinking you're to be subjected to another set of poorly spelled pseudo-erotic scribblings, you quickly realize as the character dies that something is quite amiss. After a short time you can't keep track of who is who and why the poor guy keeps getting lit on fire. Another great example of the Heavy Metal/Geek combination that showed up in a small number of AE lines in the 80's.
  +
spock.art 5904
 Digitized Picture of Star Trek's Mr. Spock
One of the nicer ASCII Art Files out there, this appears to have been some sort of program output that looked at a graphics file of Mr. Spock and then mapped it to different ASCII characters based on how "dark" those letters and numbers and characters were. If you print it out so that it's black letters on a white background, it looks pretty darn impressive. Of course, actually printing it out and putting it on a wall would immediately tap you as a geek, so be careful, and have a shredder at hand.
  +
stupidki.hac 4942
 The Destructiveness of the "Kids", from an Anonymous Source
A writer reaches out to the community to lament the loss of the days of the Open System and the unprotected BBS, and gives some (occasionally gleeful) descriptions of the steps he's been forced to take to protect himself. The exact tone of this missive is a little hard to track: in some places he's nostalgic and out of sorts about the way the world has changed, and in others he's the first to the forefront of implementing clampdowns of security and creating traps for any hapless hackers attacking his BBS. Definitely makes you think, if not too hard.
  +
suicide 10438
 Getting Others to Commit Suicide, by The Blade of the Neon Knights
The Blade was one of the leaders of the Neon Knights, who themselves were an elite portion of the Metal Communications team, purveyor of textfiles throughout the BBS world, but mostly through AE lines. With their unique blend of Heavy Metal, Satanism, and Geek Chic, the group put out some of the odder files out there. In the case of this file, The Blade tells you how to drive others to self-destruction, so as to make it easier to get into college or a well-paying job. A graphic collection of sick suggestions; just the soft of thing you could expect from this group. Are people really afraid of this sort of thing?
  +
taoprogram.pro 27266
 The Tao of Programming, by Geoffrey James
Mr. James' gentle and intelligent retelling of the idea of the Tao redone for programming, hardware, and software. This soft of file, meant to be a light parody of another, more famous work, ends up standing up pretty well on its own. There's one for documentation as well, and there's other more pop-culture books expounding on the Tao you can purchase these days. A good read if you believe in it or you don't.
  +
taping.hum 5117
 The Taping I, by Underwarez
A particularly virulent example of a "Rag File", a file whose entire purpose was to tease, slander, or otherwise ridicule another member of the same (usually pirating or phreaking) subculture. In this particular rag, a hapless user named Jeff Spicolli is subject to implications of incest, lack of technical knowledge, bestiality, and other similar traits, ending with his voice telephone number. This type of file would start showing up on local AE lines or BBSes and while most of these rants would disappear about a week or two after the Sysops took them down, a few still hung around. The most involved set of rag files to my knowledge would be the Matt Ackeret chronicles from Anarchy Incorporated.
  +
tencoms.pro 1029
 The Ten Commandments of RBBS
I was never a big fan of RBBS software, mostly because a lot of the sysops I ran into had the attitude put forward in this file. Reading over the commandments, we find that the SysOp is God, that you must not use handles or speak of things not involving computers, that profanity is unwelcome, and that a full three commandments dictate what kind of advertising you may post. This file is a great example of how attitude could turn a BBS from a place of fun to a stuffed-shirt, bland, unenjoyable piece of cardboard. Then again, posting this kind of file told people what kind of administrator you were right off the bat, enabling easy and quick escape. Run.
  +
top10.news 4272
 The Top 10 Media Errors about the Steven Jackson Games Raid
This 1992 document from Steve Jackson games responds to some of the most blatant factual errors about the infamous "Raid" on that role-playing game company. In the course of an investigation, the US Secret Service raided Steve Jackson games and confiscated all the materials of a role-playing game called GURPS CYBERPUNK, which was played with dice and cards, and didn't even involve a computer. SJ Games were unable to have their game back for 7 months, during which time it was described as some sort of "hacking manual" that the country had to be protected from. Naturally, when all was said and done, the game was harmless and nothing what the Secret Service claimed it was. A true insight into ignorance on a massive scale.
  +
tr823.txt 106655
 The Internet Worm Program: An Analysis, by Eugene H. Spafford
The Internet Worm changed a lot of minds about how interconnected and insecure the Internet was at that time. Using a combination of weaknesses and back doors in common programs, the Worm wended its way throughout the then-small Net and succeeded in crippling it. This document, written during the Aftermath, presents a well-thought-out analysis of all the methodology used by the worm, as well as a general oversight of the state of the Internet of the time. Long, but worth it.
  +
upc.txt 6726
 Cracking the Universal Product Code, by Count Nibble
Count Nibble makes a second appearance in the top 100 files with his steady, thoughtful explanation of exactly how those silly black lines on every product in the supermarket work. What possible use this knowledge could have in one's day to day existence is pretty darn irrelevant; the point was, it was THERE, we WANTED TO KNOW, and Nibble FOUND IT OUT. That's the spirit of learning. Read and find out too.
  +
urine.box 4141
 Urine Box Plans, by Wolfgang von Albatross (March 2, 1986)
By the time this file appeared on AE lines across the country, "Box" files had proliferated to the point that it was hard to tell who came up with with idea first. As might be expected, parodies began appearing, including the "Blotto Box" (which would supposedly destroy an entire telephone central switching office) and this specimen, which purports to cause the headset on the other end of the line to injure or kill the user. Naturally, this file is complete fiction, but constructed with enough of a straight face to make the unsuspecting collector think they have some sort of accurate textfile. An excellent awareness test.
  +
utopia.hum 3193
 Login Screen for the Utopia BBS: "May I take your Order Please?"
Taking advantage of the easily modifiable source code of their BBS, the Sysops of Utopia BBS constantly (and I do mean constantly) retooled all menus, messages, login and logoff screens, and even system functions. One result of this was that you always had a surprise the next time you connected to the BBS, and you always felt like you were part of a party. Note that the system actually made me type in my password, only to ignore me and continue its merry blather for a few more paragraphs.
  +
vaxen.jok 15163
 VAXen, My Children, Just Don't Belong Some Places, by Mike O'Brien
Mr. O'Brien's ode to the misunderstood, mistreated VAX has achieved quite a large distribution; I keep finding it buried everywhere, in joke files and computer information sites and just generally all over. Through his sad tale of VAX abuse, Mike keeps you interested to the very end. How much of it is true is left up to the reader, of course, but somehow, it just rings enough with me to consider it real. Interesting.
  +
violence.txt 11481
 Fun! With Random Senseless Violence, by Count Nibble (August 2, 1985)
Count Nibble was one of the most literate of all the Apple II-era textfile writers, pre-dating similarly styled groups like Metal Communications and the Cult of the Dead Cow by years with his musical quotes, proper spelling and formatting, and choosing all sorts of esoteric subjects to write about. In the case of this file, he lists out his suggestions for causing mayhem and destruction on a boring summer's night. Through browsing his web presence, an interesting fact about Nibble made itself known to me: He was college-age when this and other files were written, bringing a maturity to both his spelling and general perspective, if not his general outlook on personal property. A pioneer.
  +
warbitch.txt 9225
 The Code of the Verbal Warrior, or Barney's Bitch Manual
Barney Badass, co-sysop of The Glue Ball and heady influence on a number of Chicago BBSes, rants forth with a set of instructions on how to conduct a proper "bitch war". In the vernacular of the Internet, this has come to be known as a "flame war", but the same idea holds: Long after the intended subject has dropped out of debate, two (or more) sides begin a verbal assault on each other that fills the message base with dozens of personal attacks, insinuations, libel, and slander. After a while, everyone not personally involved in the bitchwar is driven away, posting messages on other sub-boards, which causes them to be insulted for not posting on the right sub-board, possibly leading to another bitchwar. Barney Badass, himself, was a true character and the instigator of some of my finest on-line memories.
  +
warning.hum 2537
 Warning: This Machine Breaks Down During Periods of Critical Need!
Another light chuckle from the textfiles of the 1970s, this file warns you that the machine is more likely to break down the more you need it. The attempt to parody industrial labelling as well as the attention to clever turns of phrase marks a lot of the "big iron" humor in textfiles from professionals and college students of this time, showing they were looking for a little lightness in their otherwise stressful and highly-taxing occupations.
  +
warnings.ufo 1031
 THE FOLLOWING ARE COMMON SENSE WARNINGS WHEN DEALING WITH A UFO
Yes, in the event that you do come across a classic lights-flashing UFO, just follow these simple hints and you probably won't be abducted, garrotted, or experimented on. A must for overseas travellers!
  +
watchem.phk 3635
 Watching the Watcher Watching You, by Sir Knight (1985)
Besides the very memorable title, Sir Knight's file stands out for his call to mistrust others in the subculture as being potential enemies and agents, and to think twice before revealing information about yourself. Most noticeably, his automatic dismissal of anyone asking "how do I do this?" on public boards shows the beginnings of a trend that continues to this day. (Note also, that his portrait of the most trustable phreakers/hackers are anyone jewish, middle-upper-class, and under 19.)
  +
whytext.oct 2223
 Why I Prefer Textfiles, by Jason Scott (February 27, 1987)
I make a cameo appearance! This file came out of my mind one summer in my 16th year while I was home sick with the flu. As my BBS was dedicated to textfiles, I thought it would be fun to write one of my own about why textfiles were better. This file was parodied by a few of my friends at the time, but I think, looking back, my heart was in the right place. (It's still there.)
  +
yipl.phk 15312
 The Youth International Party Line #1, Transcribed by BIOC Agent 003
BIOC, besides being particularly good at writing textfiles of his own composition, was dedicated to preserving knowledge of the foundation that he and others were building on top of. In the case of Phone Phreaks and later Phreak Magazines, this foundation was YIPL, the house organ of the Yippies, who were a revolutionary youth group of the 1960's. YIPL provided one of the first radical magazines dedicated to learning more about technology. While the first issues (under the influence of Abbie Hoffman and others) merely called upon its readers to use this knowledge as a crowbar to smash the state, later issues (when the magazine renamed itself to the Technological Assistance Party, or TAP) brought forth a love of learning and understanding how technology affected all our lives, and a need to know who was pulling the strings. BIOC does his best to transcribe this issue as close to what it looked like when hastily-scrawled copies were sent out to a few dozen people in June of 1971. Good show. +

There are 100 files for a total of 2,853,285 bytes.

+ + + +

If you wish to have the entire directory conveniently archived and compressed into one file, please download +either 100.tar.gz (1101660 bytes) or 100.zip (1135379 bytes) instead of all the files separately.

diff --git a/textfiles.com/100/.modemlif.hac b/textfiles.com/100/.modemlif.hac new file mode 100644 index 00000000..83cd0f61 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/100/.modemlif.hac @@ -0,0 +1,312 @@ + + + +The Modem Life + + + + +
+  +

On an average October lunch break in 2001 I fired up my web browser +to do my daily surfing of one of my favorite news sites, slashdot.org- +one of the featured stories included a link to the textfile.com web site. +Me being a BBS user of the 1980s I began to remiss of my computing days +of past and after some browsing I found myself speechless as I sat face +to face with my past- words that I had written sixteen years prior had +been preserved and to some degree, celebrated on this site. I remained +stunned for days and felt like I had just made contact with a long lost +brother as the message that I wrote all that time ago had some special +meaning to me. After a few e-mail exchanges with Jason (the webmaster) +he ask that I write some companion text to my original message to help +solidify the context of the message and to further the celebration of the +special times when it was written- times that proved to be the infancy +of the modern online community. I have included the added companion text +in this version of my letter which is written in italics and contained +in brackets. +
  +
  +

The Modem Life. Is it Really Worth it? +
====================================== +
      Written by The Nomad, for +
       all BBS's that wish it. +

Note/Warning: +
=============== +
The author of this file will go detailed into his life and will explain +his feelings quite openly.  If you are not mature enough to handle +what the author is going to say and wish to insult him for his beliefs, +I suggest you read no further. +

[Users often focused much of their online time to systems that were +within their local calling zone for cost issues, multiplied with the fact +that there was a significantly smaller users community and it meant that +the same users would often converse on a number of local systems. As well, +with such a small home computer user base within the country many people +didn’t have immediate contacts to share their passion for computers with +which often lead them to reach out to others they found in the online world +for friendship. I personally had arranged a number of meetings with others, +attended several mid-size user group parties and even, along with a few +others went to the funeral of an online friend that I had who I had never +meet. I wrote this disclaimer since many people that would be reading this +message had met me or had some idea of who I was and to let potential abusers +and our peers know that I considered the use of this message as ammunition +for abuse to be of extremely poor taste. Today, this might seem silly but +I felt it worthwhile as abuse was gaining popularity as an online activity.] +
  +

Well, another typical day in the modem world.  Doesn't it just +make you want to throw-up all over the keyboard? +

Recently I thought I would call the numbers on the Megaterm 3.0 Famous +Systems phone book  [Megaterm was a terminal program used to dial-up +and communicate with BBSs, it’s distribution came with a list of BBSs that +were favorites of the author.]  thinking these would be the "Top +of the line" BBS's.  As the Megaterm began to dial with Safehouse +I kicked back and watched.  Busy.  Not surprising.  It then +proceeded to dial other BBS's, most of which I never have heard of.  +After about two more tries the program started to freeze.  Not sure +what was going on I picked up the phone only to hear the recording "We're +sorry but the number you have dialed has been disconnected or is no longer +in service...".  I then hit [U] to unmark the number and continue +the Megaterm dialing.  Not too worried that that board was down the +Megaterm continued to dial as I again kicked back and watched.   +[Obtaining a connection to a board often seemed like a ritual to many +online users of the day since access to most systems was limited to one +user at a time. Of course, the most popular systems were always the hardest +to get on to. The notation of using the brackets as in “[M]essage” was +sometimes used as a courtesy to identify valid system prompt commands (in +this case the letter “M”), this is somewhat analogous to providing key +words.] The very next number that was opening message and the prompt +for my password or 'NEW'.  Being a new user I typed 'NEW'.  To +my displeasure the system told me it was a private BBS that allowed no +new users and hung me up.  Very displeased I kicked back in my chair +and started to listen a little closer to the TV in the other room as the +Megaterm began to start dialing again.  After two more welcome busy +signals the Megaterm started to flip from 'Click' to 'Busy' and back and +forth.  Confused, I picked up the phone and again heard that dreadful +recording "Were sorry...".  Very uneasy I pressed [U] to unmark the +number.  After a small welcome string of busy signals I got a ring.  +The phone was answered and a carrier was sent.  The Megaterm then +connected for me only to find that it was a Pixboard.  Very pleased +(I love pixboards!) I called back and loaded up Pixterm. [Pixboards +were special BBS’s that were capable of transmitting images to the caller, +this technology was quite revolutionary for the average online user of +the day who was accustom to viewing just plain old text.  Pixterm +was the custom terminal program required to interact and view the images +on a Pixboard.]  Once connected, pleased to see some nice graphics +in the opening message I then typed in 'NEW'.  Only to find out that +a $10 validation fee was required to access ANYTHING but the main menu +and [M]essage to SysOp. [Most boards of the day offered a number of +different levels of user access and most systems required the SysOp to +validate a new user before they were granted privileges beyond reading +messages. Validated users could post messages to these boards and were +allowed to stay online for a longer period of time before being forced +to log-off. Higher levels of access, which were acquired either by purchase, +favor or personal contact, often provided benefits like allowing access +to restricted boards, longer online times and access to a BBSs’ textfile +database. Some boards also had hidden levels of access which, if obtained, +allowed access to hidden message boards, allowed the user to know the identity +of otherwise anonymous posters and provided moderation capabilities to +delete messages.]  After messing around for a few minutes I got +bored and typed "OFF" to leave the system.  I then returned to Megaterm +and it continued to dial.  After another busy signal the numbers sequence +started over.  And I got a ring, before I knew it, the words: +

   THE SAFEHOUSE MEGANET - PORT #02 +
    "WHERE YOU'RE ALWAYS WELCOME!" +

were printed across the screen, me being a regular caller to the board +entered my name and password only then to be logged off due to the fact +the that port was being reserved for a level 5 user. [The Safehouse +was one of the few systems that had multiple phone line capabilities but +reserved one of those lines for a user with higher-level access, which +I sadly didn’t have.] +

 Very discouraged and then realizing that some day, The Safehouse +would die too such as others favorite systems like Sherwood Forest II, +The Outpost, The World of Cryton, and Sherwood Forest ///. I then quietly +went to bed. +

  [Extra Note:  No offense Safehouse Manager] +

 A day or two later I decided to give a few of the local boards +a call, only to find that the most active sub-boards around were abuse!  +After reading a dozen or so messages I came across a message that was insulting +my personal favorite BBS, The Digital Dimension, on-line since Aug. 1983, +a VERY nice system.  The post was saying how bad the board was because +the SysOp wouldn't give him high access, and never answered [F]eedback, +or [C]hats. [Feedback was a simple e-mail letter to the SysOp. The chat +function was a request that could be invoked by an online user for the +SysOp to engage in a real-time conversation while the user was online. +Once activated, the user could then continue with their online session +while a message was displayed on the SysOp’ monitor indicating the function +had been activated. It was always fun when a SysOp would break in on your +session (particularly if the chat function was never invoked). To add to +the fun, many SysOps had a message automatically displayed as a prelude +to the chat that often included some overtones of a Godly entrance before +the chat began.] I was pretty upset, the SysOp is a personal friend +so I naturally [P]osted about the matter and explained how he is a very +busy person and tries to do as much as he can, after all there are over +750 users!  [The number of registered users for a BBS was always +analogous to a tigers’ stripes and a point of great pride to a SysOp.]  +Feeling satisfied I logged off and observed a few other local boards only +to find more abuse, hatred, and destruction.  I then decided I would +go outside and get some fresh air and live a normal life, after all I don't +want to take the image of a 'computer freak'.  [Many people of +school age that had a computer were considered a computer freak by default +since the concept and benefits of why anyone would want a computer was +totally alien to the average person.] A day later, very concerned, +I again auto-dialed to same board with Matthew Dornquast's beloved Megaterm.  +After about a half an hour of dialing I heard the computer in the other +room signal that a ring was detected.  I came in the room and went +through the logon procedures and went straight to the abuse board to find +about 10 new messages after mine!  I began to read them; more of the +same hatred.  I then came to a post about 4 after mine by the person +that I posted about.  He told me off and posted my number.  I +was very uneasy, I have never heard of the guy before and he posted my +number!   [Much like what will possibly always be, not all +online users of the day were cordial and some were even looking for trouble. +Posting an individuals’ phone number on a BBS  was often used as a +method of attack against a person in an attempt to destroy that persons’ +anonymity of using an alias. It also attempted to demonstrate ones’ resourcefulness +as personal information was often highly guarded from the general online +public.] Not sure to post or not I sat there for a minute and said +why not.  Not bothering to read the other new messages I [P]osted.  +I then told him how everyone had their own right to say what they want +and that posting number solved nothing.  Of course later that week, +for about three days I received prank calls, I would pick up the phone +with a "Hello?" Nothing.  He would just sit there, hoping that I would +get upset with his deed.  This will make him happy.  I then started +to tell him how much of a man he was by prank calling, he was probably +expecting to here "We have a trace on our line blah blah blah!" I then +hung up.  He never called back. [These of course were all days +prior to Caller ID and related technologies. As phone abuse was often a +method of attack against another online user many people either did or +claimed to of declared to the phone company that they were receiving harassing +phone calls and worked out arrangements to have a call trace placed on +their line.]  Later on that day my very good SysOp friend of The +Digital Dimension called me.  He started to explain how he was told +earlier today that he was going to be moving at the end of this school +year.  He then asked me very seriously 'Bryan, will you please run +a copy of the board in Houston while I take a copy to Iowa.' I thought +long and hard, being a SysOp required a lot of work, time, and devotion. +A whole lot.  I agreed.  Many things were now needed to be done.  +Now realizing that I didn't have the hardware to support the system, that +weekend I started a buying spree.  I first bought my Sider 10 Megabyte +hard drive, $695. [Can you believe 10MB for $700? The scary part is +that was considered cheap- the Sider was the first hard disk widely available +for under a $1000.]  Then bought a Thunderclock, another $110.  +[Apple II computers did not come equipped with a system clock, which +was necessary to keep track of users login times. The Thunderclock was +an expansion card that plugged into the system bus and provided this basic +function.] I of course needed a firmware chip for my cat, $30.  +[This firmware EPROM plugged into a socket on an Applecat brand modem +and enhanced the functionality of the modem to allow it to answer phone +calls.]  And so my computer won't overheat, a System Saver, $70.  +[The “System Saver” was an encased fan that attached to the outside +air vents of the Apple II to provide increased airflow though the otherwise +fanless unit.]  I then realized that I would need my own phone +line so I called the phone company and got it installed, $120.  Realizing +how many callers I would loose if the number changed, I would have to pay +an additional $60 to get the same number, 713/497-4633 but that will have +to wait ‘till he moves.  After realizing I just spent over a thousand +dollars just to get the board started I began to get use to the software.  +It was a home brew. [custom written.]  Nevertheless, a very +nice one.  I started to write new "mods" [modifications] and +features for the board.  I only had a print out of the board then +so the SysOp could get his software copyrighted. [More specifically,  +the SysOp  was ultimately wanting to get his software published and +was advised by his agent to not distribute electronic versions of the source +code for it.] Knowing that in order to keep the high quality of the +system it would require many long nights over the keyboard, more night +then ever before.  Typing...  thinking... working...  programming.  +After showing the SysOp my progress, he was quite pleased.  I rewrote +many functions.  Many features were now more efficient and faster +then before.  I also started the beginning of our soon to be enormous +[L]ibrary on our new 'baby' the 10 Meg Sider. [It was often in the mind +of an individual to better understand ones computers and how to control +it. As well, me being the person I am, couldn’t leave good enough alone.] +

 After a month or so, with the same old BBS abuse and programming, +I took a look at all the work I had done.  Over 200 files in the [L]ibrary +so far, many new features which have never appeared on a board in the U.S.  +(to my knowledge) have been thought up, organized, and programmed.  +I then thought, when I take the board over I will be the victim all this +major abuse on these other boards.  What an honor.  God, what +an honor!  I then began to wonder, why, why does everyone abuse everyone +else so much?  Are they insecure?  Are they really that upset?  +Are they just blowing off a little steam?  Do they enjoy making enemies?  +Do they feel superior to insult others?  I don't know.  I really +don't know.  I myself like to make friends.  Not only just friends +that I will talk to on the phone, but ones that come over on weekends, +go out partying on Friday nights, play sports, and just about anything +else a true friend does.  Without knowing that I went to the same +school as Shadow's Pawn for almost a year I meet him at the SysOps house +and am now good friends with him.  Despite the fact that I am two +years older then him, he is on the football team, I am in band and enjoy +playing the trumpet, and we had almost no common interests became good +friends because of similar interests, the computer.  But I still came +back to the same question "Why do they abuse?" Why?  Life is bad enough +as it is, and then there are the feds who are after all us pirates, phreakers, +and hackers.  [I had to laugh some when I read this. Pirates are +individuals that distribute copyrighted software. Phreakers are individuals +who acquire and use long distance PIN access numbers that don’t belong +to them. Hackers are individuals who attempted to penetrate computer systems +that they weren’t granted access to. (The modern definition of this activity +has changed and is now referred to as cracking. Crackers of this day were +individuals that found methods to circumvent software copy protection schemes, +if someone was successful in a particular pursuit they would say they “Cracked +it”.) While I’ve never been one to not give people their due and don’t +condone these activities I found that many people did them out of necessary +to further their knowledge of computers given their limited resources. +At that, many were minors and knew there was a limited recourse that could +be taken against them at that time. I laugh because the fear of the feds +was something that was often the buzz on different message boards while +the reality showed that they typically had little interest in what was +going on.]  Who needs more enemies?  While we can all be +helping each other the "good old" traditional computer activities like +helping others get up to date "wares", even if they have a Networker modem +and not that "excepted" Applecat? [Wares are the items of trade for +a software pirate. The Networker modem was capable of transferring data +at 300 baud while the Applecat could do 1200 so the bias was obvious.]  +I remember back when I first got my modem.  I couldn't remember one +abuse board. Not one.  Then suddenly one by one, slowly but surely, +they started coming up with the demand of them due to the large amount +of hatred from two users.  Now, the abuse board is just as common +as the public board.  Why?  Why?  Then somewhere, some one +person had a grand idea.  The same thing that happened over two hundred +years ago.  This genius said, that order in the modem society is a +must and some form of government must be formed.  Thus came Tele-Trial, +with this new concept came new constitutions, new sub-boards, and an incensement +of tele-conferencing phreaking.  The constitutions would set the laws +of the BBS. The sub-boards would provide a special meeting place for matters +of the tele-trial and the tele-conference for the often called "court room" +for the trial of the defendant.  This system worked in many places.  +Punishments were often deletion from that board or even to the great extent +of credit card information being released, and abused.  But for many, +deleting ones password would not keep them off the system.  They would +just call back with a new handle and abuse more people till he was deleted +again.  And the process goes on and on.  Believe me, I have seen +it happen.  So I came to the conclusion that this method is not full +proof.  I then came upon a crazy idea of mine.  Not so sure of +myself I begin my think more in-depth.  One hope for me remained, +and I then walked to my computer, put in Apple Writer and began to type. +[Apple Writer was the de facto standard word processor for Apple II +users of the day.] Now, I have completed my work.  My task is +finished at this moment of Sunday May 26 1985 at 12:55 in the morning.  +I thank you for you time and am sorry for any and all errors. +

    Sincerely, +

      Bryan Nomad +

In Jason's comments about my letter he said that this was a plea +to the online community of 1985, in retrospect I have to concur that he +is right. What’s sad however is that you could change a small amount of +this message and make it meaningful to an online world that exists years +later- sufficient  to say that it’s hard to imagine some aspects of +the online community ever changing so long as people can operate with some +degree of anonymity. Throughout the decades that I’ve spent online I’ve +found that, from a human perspective the modem lifes’ greatest tool is +to allow people the freedom to express what they really want and be the +person they want to be- no excuses, no limits, no regrets.  Some people +that appear as kind individuals in person live in shadows online where +their true self can run free without fear of retribution. Others however  +prove themselves noble and dignified without reward and are often brighter +gems then what the eye beholds. The choices come from within, the freedom +is yours. In the end, I think you just have to ask yourself "What kind +of world do you want?" +

Respectfully, +

-Bryan (bpnomad@yahoo.com) +

  +

+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/100/.realpira.hum b/textfiles.com/100/.realpira.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd1e3e08 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/100/.realpira.hum @@ -0,0 +1,1349 @@ + +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- +The Annotated Real Pirate's Guide: +A Cultural Guidepost, with notes from +Jason Scott, TEXTFILES.COM 01/04/2002 +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +How This Came About: + +In early 2001 I was asked to add to a music project by reading from whatever +I considered to be a "classic" textfile. I chose an old, early 1980's file +called "The Real Pirate's Guide", by "Rabid Rasta". I figured that this +example of textfile writing would stand out in everyone's mind as the best +type of Pirate Hubris and harken back to the days when 300 baud modems +ruled the earth and no one really dreamed that people would have more speed +going to their homes than once existed as the entire ARPAnet's backbone. + +As I browsed over the file and began reading it as if anew, however, +I found that I was straining to understand all the references that Rabid +Rasta was making, and that if it was giving ME trouble, with all the recent +studying I'd been doing of BBS-era textfiles, then a whole generation of +computer users were going to have the historical text available at a single +mouseclick or URL, but lose the full meaning of what the text referred to. + +I decided to try, as a sort of experiment, to annotate the Real Pirate's +Guide, and give some context to the lines in the file. This is not the +best way to read this file for the first time; you should read the +unaltered original, and then come back to this version. (A copy of the +original file exists at http://www.textfiles.com/100/realpira.hum) + +To my surprise, this file has touched on many different aspects of the +1980's BBS era, much more than an instruction guide for "Real Pirates" +would be expected to, and the effort has been well worth it. + +I've tried to be as complete as possible about a subject being touched on +by this file. In some cases, I go completely overboard, but I'd rather have +the maximum amount of information about a piece of history than not enough. + +Any entries and comments that I'm making are couched in a bunch of ----- +lines, and be upper and lowercase, 80 columns. The original text is 40 +columns, all uppercase. + +I invite any comments and additions to improve this file. + +- Jason Scott + TEXTFILES.COM + +============================================================================ + +The following file, "The Real Pirate's Guide", was a file distributed on +computer Bulletin Board Systems (BBSes) in the early 1980's. Dated as 1984, +this file was probably written as a parody of specific figures within the +author's local calling area. It was then "uploaded" (sent) to a number of +BBSes, where its entertaining nature and easy accessibility as a humor piece +encouraged users to "download" (retrieve) it and send it to other Bulletin +Board Systems around the country, and later the world. Its popularity and +quality show in the fact that a search of the Internet in 2001 finds copies +of the file still accessible from at least two dozen sites, and it is likely +buried in archives at even more, 17 years after it was first written. + +By 1984 there were thousands of BBSes connected to single phone lines +throughout the country, running on microcomputers and using modems to +answer calls coming in from all over. While most BBSes of the time could be +considered "above-board" and focusing on computer tips, political discussion +and generally "acceptable" conversation, there were also a large amount of +"underground" BBSes, which contained information on computer hacking, phone +phreaking, and software piracy. Lacking the space for large-scale program +storage, very few BBSes actually contained pirated software for download +(or would only have one or two programs available on a rotating basis) +but they were often used as meeting places to arrange trade between two +otherwise unlikely-to-meet users. This environment of piracy brought +with it the usual baggage of a subculture composed of young teens: Hubris, +One-Upmanship, wild claims, and most interestingly, unique and shifting +language meant to leave nonparticipants in the dust. In this environment, +an author calling himself "Rabid Rasta" created a humorous/instructive +textfile about the world of online software piracy called "The Real Pirate's +Guide." + +The idea of the "Textfile" or "G-Phile" was that aside from the messages and +writing that users posted to a BBS, some essays and thoughts were considered +important or entertaining enough to be given a separate section to read from. +A number of BBS programs called this section the "General Files" section, +reachable from their main menu with a "G" command, and these writings were +soon referred to as "G Files", later "G Philes". At first just a random +selection of textfiles, a small subset of the BBS world formed into groups +who would produce a series of text; these serials soon became hot items for +some BBSes as the newest installments would come out. The "Real Pirate's +Guide" did spawn a large amount of sequels and homages (over 20), but Rabid +Rasta's involvement with them seems minimal. + +Here, then, is the "Real Pirate's Guide", with my additional notes. I +have tried to be as accurate as possible and kept my opinions to myself, +focusing instead on why certain phrases are said the way they are, and to +try to give context to Rabid Rasta's work. + +The file has undergone a number of edits and changes over time, making +determination of what it originally looked like somewhat difficult, but I +believe the file being annotated in this document is the "canonical" +text, which I downloaded from a BBS around late 1984. +------------------- + +[/] [\] [/] [\] [/] [\] [/] [\] [/] [\] +[\] [/] +[/] THE REAL PIRATE'S GUIDE [\] +[\] [/] +[/] COMPILED BY [\] +[\] RABID RASTA [/] +[/] [\] +[\] [/] [\] [/] [\] [/] [\] [/] [\] [/] + +------------------- +This file was originally written in 40 columns, all uppercase. Why? Because +the Apple II, one of the more popular home computers of the early 1980's, +did not originally come with the ability to do 80 columns, or lowercase. +This was later remedied, and for those who paid the money, a chip could be +installed to give older Apples these missing features. + +BBS programs would often ask you how many columns you wished to see the BBS +in. This normally only came into play in the message bases, where you might +see the same message others were seeing, but converted back down to 40 +columns. + +To a very small amount, the 40 column/80 column difference was used as a +sign of eliteness or status, although Apple computers were already on the +high end of the cost scale for most people and focusing on such a minor +thing was not ultimately that relevant. Then again, the social strata +around the speed of one's modem persisted for well over a decade. + +The use of 40 columns/uppercase helps the historian to locate the time of +a file, although some people continued to use their 40 column computers +well into the late 1980's. Additionally, as more and more BBSes became +purely 80 columns, many older textfiles were converted to 80 columns +upper/lower by later authors, who sometimes took this opportunity to put +their own name on the works. This unfortunately muddles the vintage of a +given file. + +In this particular case, Rabid Rasta was kind enough to give the date of +his work as 1984, which helps indicate where things stood historically. +Apples were now on the market for roughly 7 years, BBSes were in the +middle of a huge explosion of computer users, and a reasonably popular +file (like this one) could be expected to be distributed around the +country, if not worldwide. + +Note that Rabid Rasta has put [/] characters around the title of his file. +It's not currently known where exactly this habit started, but the use of +minimal "text graphics" to surround the title and author of a textfile has +continued to the present day. Even back then, the graphics could get +somewhat elaborate, although nothing like it ended up becoming in the 90's. +------------------- + +[SIMULATION] + +FROM-> JHONNY THE AVENGER +DATE-> SAT AUG 4 10:21 PM + +I SAW YOUR MESSAGE ON THE PIRATE BOARD +ABOUT YOU HAVEING SIDE 2 OF SUMMER GAM +ES!MY CONNECTIONS MR.ZEROX AND CHEIF S +URGEN BLACK BAG ARE'NT AROUND TO MAIL +IT 2 ME SO WANNA DO SOME SERIUS TRADEI +NG?I HAVE GRAFORTH ,CHOPLIFTER ,MARS +CARS,DISK MUNCHER AND SOME K00L OTHER + +STUFF AND GAMES.CALL ME AT 312-323- +3741.IF YOU NEED PHREAK CODES I HAVE +THEM TO AND BOX PLANS.BYE + + *** ***** ** + * * * * +* * * ****** + ** HONNY * HE * * VENGER + + + +*THE KNIGHTS OF MYSTERIOUS KEYBOARDS*! + + THE AWESOMEST HACK GROUP IN TOWN + +------------------- +Rabid Rasta is parodying a particularly geeky software pirate's message +on a BBS. Besides the intentionally bad spelling (as opposed to the +unintentional bad spelling RR has in the rest of the file), he also tries +to touch on some of the more annoying aspects of "pirates" from the era. + +This file is very Apple-centric, and all the software packages mentioned +were available on the Apple II. A few were ported to other platforms, but +only the Apple had every package. "Choplifter" was a top-selling game of +1982, "Mars Cars" was never a top seller but was made in roughly 1983, +and "Disk Muncher" was a disk copy program that was as ubiquitous as you +could get, with its ability to copy a disk in four passes. "GraForth" +was a graphics-oriented Forth language interpreter for the Apple II. +(FORTH, the computer language, was created by Charles Moore in 1968.) +The inclusion of a programming language disk in a listing of games is +likely an intentional jab at "Jhonny"'s lack of computer savvy. + +As for "Side 2" of "Summer Games" (created by Epyx Software in 1983), +this is a reference to the fact that floppy disks at the time could be +double-sided, with each side holding 140k of information. If a game or +program was particularly large, a company would put information on both +sides of a disk, requiring the user to flip over the disk when prompted +to by the program. This could be a headache for pirates who would get a +copy of a game, only to find that what they had was a copy of just one +side of the disk. Begging for "Side 2" would then commence, which made +you look particularly foolish, since you hadn't even been able to pirate +a complete program. + +"Jhonny" also makes reference to several prominent pirates and one +pirating group in his message. Many pirates would band together into +groups, under which they would all distribute their pirated games. Like +any such culture, groups which made prominent, popular releases would +gain positive reputations, while others that came off as a bunch of +kids who were just giving themselves a big name would not. + +"Mr. Xerox" was not a member of the "Black Bag" pirating group as far +as I can determine, but "Chief Surgeon" most certainly was. Obviously, +these are both misspelled in the example. + +The "Knights of Mysterious Keyboards" is probably a reference to the +"Knights of Shadow", a somewhat prominent phreaking group of the time +whose most famous member was Bioc Agent 003, who wrote the "Basics +of Telecommunications" series of phreaking files. + +As for the phone number in the example, I've gone through the trouble +of tracking its history and it was in fact the phone number of a BBS +called "The Chipmunk BBS", running in the Chicago area on an Apple II, +that dates back to the early 1980's. This points strongly to Rabid +Rasta making a not-so-veiled reference to an actual user of BBSes. +------------------- + +IS THE AUTHOR OF THE ABOVE MESSAGE A +TRUE PIRATE? SINCE THE BEGINNING OF +TIME THERE HAS BEEN AN IMPLICIT CODE +OF ETIQUETTE GOVERNING THE ACTIONS OF +SOFTWARE PIRATES, BUT AS MANY OF YOU +MAY HAVE NOTICED AS OF LATE, THAT CODE +HAS BEEN KNOCKED AROUND A BIT. ALTHOUGH +IT'S NOT DIFFICULT TO DIFFERENTIATE A +TRUE PIRATE FROM ONE OF THESE POOR IMI +TATIONS, I BELIEVE THAT, WITH THE NUM- +BER OF TRUE PIRATES DECREASING AT SUCH +AN ALARMING RATE, THIS CODE SHOULD BE +SET STRAIGHT. AFTER ALL, ALTHOUGH +"JHONNY" IS ADMITTEDLY A MORON, IT'S +NOT HIS FAULT THAT HE NEVER RECEIVED +PROPER GUIDANCE. + +-------------------- +The entire idea of "Real" guides (as this file spawned dozens and dozens +of imitations) stems from a humor book written in 1982 called "Real Men +Don't Eat Quiche", by Bruce Feirstein. In this book, you're told what +makes a real man, with rule after rule accompanied by illustrations. This +simple approach was easy for Rabid Rasta to use for this file, and for +others to use when they made copy-cat files. + +Essentially, the structure is this: Line after line of "Real XXX do..." +and "Real XXX don't...", with an occasional Corollary to make things +clearer (or funnier, whichever was better). How well this worked depended +on the talent of the writer. In the case of this first file, he did very +well indeed, although as we'll see, the jokes are very "inside" and often +haven't stood the test of time. + +By 1984 personal computers were becoming more ubiquitous, and with these +computers came modems, and with the modems came more and more users of +BBSes (and BBSes, as well). The cycle of the "January Losers" was now +underway, where each January the local BBSes were filled with all the +young kids who'd been given shiny new modems for Christmas and had hit +up all their friends for BBS numbers to call. If you'd started calling +BBSes from 1981 or 1982, it wouldn't be hard to feel like the barbarians +were at the gates, and the special community you'd built up and good +reputation you had was now on the verge of being worthless. To some +extent, this is where the concept of "elite" came from, as you had to +have some way to differentiate yourself from all the new unwashed +masses that were keeping every BBS line busy well into the night. + +Eventually, of course, came a January that Never Ended (on the Internet +the was called the September that Never Ended) when the number of people +who now had modems arrive was so great than their flooding of the BBS +world would never subside again until the 1990s. +-------------------- + +ONE OF THE FIRST AND FOREMOST RULES OF +PIRACY:REAL PIRATES ARE OVER 15 YEARS +OLD! EXCEPTIONS TO THIS RULE ARE EX- +TREMELY RARE AT BEST. + +-------------------- +In 1984, anyone 15 or older would have been born in 1969 or earlier. +-------------------- + +COROLLARY: YOU NEVER HAVE TO WONDER +WHO BREEDED MICKEY MOUSE WITH A 2600 HZ +TONE TO PRODUCE A REAL PIRATE'S VOICE. + +--------------------- +The 2600hz tone had meaning in the context of blue boxing, where sending +that frequency down a phone line in certain situations would cause the Bell +telephone system equipment to suddenly start treating you as an operator. +By sending additional signals (with the assistance of a blue box or other +such phreaking device) you would then be able to do all sorts of interesting +tricks. + +This number, chosen because it was unlikely to be a sound that would +otherwise come over a phone line, is the source of the title of 2600 +Magazine, the Hackers' Quarterly. + +For all that, Rabid Rasta is merely saying that a real pirate does not have +a high, squeaky voice. Mentioning phone phreaking terminology in such an +offhand manner was just showing off. +---------------------- + +ALIASES +------- + +REAL PIRATES ARE MORE IMAGINATIVE THAN TO +USE THE WORD "COPY" IN THEIR ALIAS. + +COROLLARY: REAL PIRATES AREN'T NAMED +"MR. COPY" BECAUSE REAL PIRATES DON'T +BRAG ABOUT CRACKING DUNG BEETLES. + +THE WORD "CRACK" (OR "KRACK") IS FOUND +NOWHERE IN A REAL PIRATE'S NAME...UN- +LESS HE REALLY KNOWS HOW TO. + +--------------- +An "Alias" was basically the name used by a user on a BBS, to shield their +identity and give them more room to express themselves, or theoretically +stop the law from tracking them down. Other terms for an alias were +"handles" and "screen names". Often, an alias was an unintentional insight +into the personality of the individual behind it. + +"Mr. Copy" appears to be local to Rabid Rasta, or at least someone who called +to the same BBSes. He's attacked several times in the file, and is painted as +an example of someone who is not a "Real Pirate" but who wishes he was one. + +"Cracking" in the context of this file means to completely remove the copy +protection of a software product. It has been a major headache and project for +Software companies since the beginning of the industry to prevent users from +simply making a digital copy of a purchased (or borrowed) piece of software +and distributing it to all their friends. To combat this happening, a +company might invest many thousands of dollars in research and programming to +make a program stop functioning once it was duplicated. In response, pirates +with just as much talent as the companies would piece together how the +protection had been added, strip it out, and modify the software code to no +longer pay attantion to the protection. The result would be a "cracked" +piece of software, which could be copied with ease, as if it were a standard +disk (which it had not been before). In some cases, pirates would be talented +enough to reduce an entire disk to a single file, making it possible to put +several programs on a single disk accessible by a menu where previously only +one program had been before. This made it easier to transfer the program over +modems (as it was smaller and took less time to do so) and it earned you the +right to brag about your ability as a "Cracker". Most crackers were pirates, +but not many pirates were crackers. + +In recent times, "Cracker" has taken on additional meanings within computers. +While nearly everyone would agree that the process of removing complicated +disk protection from a commercial game is at the very least a formidable task +requiring a lot of (misused) talent, the new meaning denotes an almost +slack-jawed use of pre-made tools to cause trouble. To people who saw the +first usage of the word as applied to computers, the new use of the term +is especially onerous. + +The game "Dung Beetles" is a Pac-Man clone where your character goes through +a maze leaving dots while a number of creatures (the Dung Beetles of the title) +try to find you. The gimmick of this game was that the maze was actually very +large, and a magnifying glass would follow your character as it moved around, +letting you have a very clear view of the maze directly around you, but not +so great a knowledge of the entire maze. By the time this file was written, +the "Dung Beetles" game was over 3 years old, so either Rabid Rasta is +insulting Mr. Copy because he has cracked a very old game, or he's claiming +that Mr. Copy did no such cracking at all. +--------------- + +REAL PIRATES' ALIASES DON'T SOUND AS +IF THEY WERE EXTRACTED FROM THE LYRICS +OF AN OZZY OZBOURNE SONG (I.E. +PROVISIONER OF SATAN, BLACK AVENGER, +DARK PHANTOM, ETC.). + +REAL PIRATES DON'T NAME THEMSELVES AF- +TER HEAVY METAL GROUPS. + +--------------- +Around this time was the rise of the Neon Knights and Metal Communications, +who most certainly named themselves after Heavy Metal themes and kept up both +the Metal theme and references to Satan and Hell wherever they could. Metal +in 1984 was yet another major genre playing on the radio, so it would make +sense that it would inspire some kids to base their handles and group names +on those themes. + +It wasn't rare to see some people sticking upside-down crosses and 666s all +over their messages or files, or some variation of "HAIL SATAN". But like a +lot of the Heavy Metal of the 1980's, this wasn't all that serious a call to +the powers of darkness. +---------------- + +REAL PIRATES, IF NAMED AFTER SOME AS- +PECT OF PIRATE LEGEND (I.E. JOLLY ROGER, +CAPTAIN HOOK, EYE PATCH, ETC.) DON'T SAY, +"AVAST YE SCURVY DOGS," OR ANYTHING +OF THE LIKE. + +----------------- +While pirates generally didn't use the words "Avast Ye Scurvy Dogs", there +was a definite Days-of-Yore theme that went through a lot of Pirate BBSes. +Some boards from the time were named "The Pirates' Cove", "The Treasure +Chest", "The Pirates' Corner", etc. While in some ways it was unwise to +advertise the true, illegal nature of your board, giving it a mysterious +name would guarantee a greater amount of callers, which was the lifeblood +of a BBS. + +A common calling card of pirates who had "cracked" a game was adding code +to display a graphic "splash screen" or "intro screen" to the front of the +program, giving credits to the pirates who had cracked the software, and +the BBSes they called! In these little graphic displays, there was often +a solid "pirates" theme, with the Jolly Roger or english lettering making +an appearance. Often, after pressing a key while looking at this screen, +the user would then be able to use the actual game. + +In a few cases, the "intro screen" code written by the pirates was better +written code than the program itself, loading an image within a fraction +of a second or doing a neat graphic trick. Occasionally, this code would +itself be "pirated" by other pirate groups for use in THEIR cracks! +----------------- + +REAL PIRATES' NAMES AREN'T PARODIES OF +OTHER REPUTABLE PIRATES (I.E. RESIDENT +OF LAVENDER BAG, MR. PAC MAN, FRANKLIN +BANDIT, ETC.). + +----------------- +"Lavender Bag" is a parody of the previously mentioned "Black Bag" Pirating +group. + +"Mr. Pac Man" is a reference to "Mr. Krac-Man", whose name was probably most +seen on a cracked version of the Electronic Arts game "Hard Hat Mack". + +The "Franklin" was a runalike version of the Apple II that was, in some ways, +quite superior (the disk drive was internal, for example), which was among the +Apple clones that were all sued by Apple for patent infringement. A prominent +pirate of this time was "Apple Bandit", hence "Franklin Bandit". +----------------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T NAME THEMSELVES AF- +TER ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGES (I.E. JACK +DANIELS, HARVEY WALLBANGER, JIM BEAM, +ETC.) ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'VE NEVER HAD +ONE. + +REAL PIRATES SPELL THEIR ALIASES COR- +RECTLY (UNLIKE "THE POENIX"). + +REAL PIRATES AREN'T NAMED SAM HOUSTON, +SIR SPANKY, THE GAMEMASTER, LORD FAGEN, +NIKKI SIX, (INSERT YOUR OWN LOSERS +HERE), OR MR. COPY. + +--------------- +Again, these appear to be local pirates who Rabid Rasta doesn't like, +especially Mr. Copy. Ironically, the appearance of their names in this file +has guaranteed some amount of fame/persistence of their handles that otherwise +would have never been. In insulting them, Rabid Rasta saved knowledge of them. +--------------- + +WARES +----- + +REAL PIRATES WOULD NEVER THINK OF DE- +LETING "SABOTAGE". IT'S TOO MUCH FUN +IMAGINING THOSE LITTLE MEN ARE ACTUAL- +LY SIR KNIGHT. + +--------------- +The term "wares" is most likely a contraction of the word "software", as +in "I have some software to trade with others" being shortened into "I +have software" or "I have softwares" and finally "wares". This sort of +corruption happens frequently in social groups, as commonly done activities +and terms for them are repeated over and over until a new clever term +arrives. If the term makes a perverse sort of sense, enough people will +use it until newcomers assume it has always been that way, and things +perpetuate. A good example of this is the "-gate" suffix to mean "scandal", +(Contra-gate, Monica-Gate) even though the original Watergate Scandal +simply referred to the name of a hotel. + +"Sabotage" is a program that is probably still stuck in the mind of anyone +who originally played it on an Apple II, even if the name itself has faded +from memory. This was a simple game on one level: You had a gun on the +bottom of the screen that you could aim left and right with two keys. On +the top of the screen, planes would drift by, dropping men with parachutes, +who would float towards the ground. If five men landed, they would gang up +on your gun and blow it up. Your task was to destroy the men before they +landed. Occasionally, a plane would come by and drop a bomb on your gun +that you had to shoot away quickly, but this was just to keep your attention. + +On the surface, this may sound repetitive, but the program was really +well-done. While you could shoot the men and make them explode, it was +possible to aim your shots just right and blow away a man's parachute, +leaving him to plummet to the ground and explode on his own. You could +also shoot a man who was above another man, making him plummet into his +comrade and sending both to their deaths. Ship debris cascading on +parachutists, needless torture of characters, and the simplicity of the +controls added up to a really fun game. + +As for the resemblance to Sir Knight, I have the memory of having heard +from others that Sir Knight was a somewhat unpleasant personality to be +around, but this wouldn't make him unusual around the sub-culture. More +likely, Rabid Rasta or a friend had a poor experience with Sir Knight and +it transmuted itself into a less-than-positive mention in this file. Sir +Knight created a file called "Making Your Phone Into a Cheesebox", which +is neither informative nor inspiring. Perhaps he doesn't need a parachute, +after all. +---------------- + +REAL PIRATES PLAY "BILESTOAD". + +---------------- +"The Bilestoad" was a unique and spectacular game for the Apple II that +came out in 1982. It won the 1983 Golden Floppy award for excellence from +Electronic Fun with Computers and Games Magazine, and quickly became a +must-have for anyone with an Apple II or access to one. Pirates considered +it an especially sweet plum in their collection. + +In the game, you controlled one of two "meatlings", humanoid figures who +were put on a large map with lots of different disks, or "shyben". The +view was from above, and you had a complicated (but learnable) set of keys +to make your Meatling walk around the map and swing weapons. If the two +meatlings were not in the same area, the game would flip between the +two players until they came together, a multi-screen concept that doesn't +really make another major appearance until the 1990s.. You could attack +your opponent with amazing ferocity, and the game had a relatively large +amount of blood and gore (although at graphics levels that wouldn't raise +an eyebrow today). + +The game is credited to "Mangrove Earthshoe", who in fact was a Georgia +Institute of Technology student named Marc Goodman. Mr. Goodman created a +number of games for the Apple, and has since gone on to do much research +and work in data mining and projective visualization, as well as gain a +doctorate. Dr. Goodman went on to create a Macintosh version of The +Bilestoad, which he still maintains and sells. +----------------- + +REAL PIRATES HAVE LONG SINCE DELETED +"SNEAKERS", "E.T.", "ALIEN MUNCHIES", +"BUG BATTLE", "SNACK ATTACK", AND +EVERYTHING FROM SSI, AVALON HILL, AND +SCOTT ADAMS. + +------------------ +Rabid Rasta throws out a few examples of "Old Wares" in this paragraph, +showing that if a game isn't recent, it's probably not worth your time or +even space on your floppy disks. His list actually cuts through a large +variety of computer game companies for the Apple II, and it's worth delving +a bit into their histories. + +"Sneakers" was a somewhat straightforward Space Invaders clone for the Apple +from Sirius Software that was published in 1981. It had multiple waves of +unique characters and was popular when it first came out, although by three +years later it was probably losing a bit of its sheen. It was written by a +16-year old Mark Turmell, who went on to co-create such later arcade games +as "NFL Blitz", "NBA Jam", "Smash TV" and "Wrestlemania" for Midway. Sirius +Software went out of business in 1984, and some of their games were then +sold to Broderbund and other rival game companies. + +"Bug Battle" was a clone of "Centipede", the arcade game by Atari. Very +little else could be found about it; it's an almost exact duplicate of the +original, and was pirated by "The Untouchables". As the original Centipede +came out in 1980, it was likely that this clone came out in 1981 or 1982. + +"E.T." is very likely a reference to "E.T. Comes Back", an adventure game +by Alliance Software that arrived in 1984. Obviously, it didn't leave much +of a positive impression on Rabid Rasta. The game was cracked by "The Nut +Cracker" and has a very strong similarity to the work of the Sierra On-Line +Adventures such as "The Dark Crystal", with simple drawings of locations and +two-word commands. Some of this genre was memorable indeed, but not this +particular game. + +"Alien Munchies" was a game that consisted of pulling a propane barbeque +back and forth along the bottom of the screen to capture aliens falling +from the sky. As an interesting side note, the cracked, file-based version +of this game includes the following message: "Re-kraked by the disk jockey. +Learn to krak right, freeze. Also, if you take out the author's name again +to put in yours, I'll break all your arms and legs. No kidding. Sincerely, +the disk jockey." + +"Snack Attack" by Dan Illowsky of Datamost Software was a Pac-Man clone from +1982 that was one of the Softalk top 10 Apple II games for that year. Datamost +software was also the publisher of the aforementioned "Bilestoad", as well +as several computer-related books. The company went under in 1984, although +it apparently resurfaced in 1986 until 1989 to produce another set of games. + +SSI (Strategic Simulations International) and Avalon Hill were both leaders +in Turn-Based Roleplaying games for the Apple II (and many other platforms) +in the early 1980's. The focus of these roleplaying games would be on famous +armed conflicts from history, although games based on sports, famous books, +or medieval times/witchcraft also made their appearance. + +Avalon Hill was founded in 1958 and had been involved in actual board games +of conflict simulations, also known as "turn-based roleplaying", where you +had advancing armies and troops that moved in rounds towards a goal. With +pieces, maps, and historical background of the conflict being portrayed, +this sort of game was very popular with a subset of the gaming audience. + +The first forays by Avalon Hill into computer games were, needless to say, +rather sedate in terms of gameplay, with the focus being on "porting" the +board games into a computer version without much regard for the advantages +a computer may bring. Many were text-based, and all were still turn-based, +requiring a set of commands and then telling you where to move. This did not +impress a generation of Apple Users who had seen the potential of the +computer in games like Broderbund Software's "Choplifter" and Electronic +Arts' "Skyfox", where graphics were starting to come into their own and the +rewards in terms of gameplay were immediate and spectacular. To be given a +game from Avalon Hill meant that you weren't exactly getting the greatest +computer-based experience on a floppy. + +Strategic Simulations International was a little less staid than Avalon Hill, +having been formed in 1979 and better focused towards the potential of the +computer. Starting from their first game, "Computer Bismarck", they were +soon a major challenger to Avalon Hill's market, and they had a much better +grip on using graphics and sound to enhance the experience. After 1984, the +company continued to expand upon its games and had a number of successes +with many different types of genres, with role-playing being just a part +of their entire outlay. + +Both companies were later bought out, and are part of other, larger firms +at this point: SSI is a division of The Learning Company, which also bought +out such diverse firms as Broderbund Software, Softkey, and Compton's. +Avalon Hill is now a division of Hasbro, and continues to focus on Turn-based +games for computer, albeit with much flashier graphics and interfaces. + +The Learning Company itself was purchased by Mattel, but later sold to "Gores +Technology Group", and parts of it were spun off to other firms. Suffice to +say, the story is rather depressing if you attach any sort of nostalgia to +the products from these firms and try to track down where they are now. + +As an aside, if you're seeking happy endings, it's much more effective (and +rewarding) to follow the lives of the programmers who made the actual games. +For example, Joel Billings, who founded SSI out of college in 1979, has gone +on to continue his work with computer gaming to this day with a company +called "2by3 Games" (World War 2 By Three Guys) and has held to his initial +love of wargames. + +Finally, Scott Adams sits a bit apart from these other programs. Founding +his software company "Adventure International" in 1979, Scott Adams created +a series of adventure games (text adventures, where you entered two word +commands to move around in locations and solve puzzles) that garnered much +praise from magazines and reviewers of the time. Adventure International +expanded in scope, creating games and other programs not only for the Apple +II but a wide variety of other plaforms, including the Atari 400/800, +Commodore 64, TRS-80, and Texas Instruments TI/99. Ultimately, however, the +games business took a downturn and Adventure International went out of +business in 1984. Scott Adams has since worked for Avista Inc. as a senior +programmer. It is likely that his dozen adventure programs that were +written for the Apple II were distributed far and wide and were pretty +hard to consider "exclusive" wares, and therefore the subject of Rabid +Rasta's scorn. +------------------- + +REAL PIRATES UPLOAD. THEY REALIZE +THAT LEECHING IS THE #2 SIN (BEHIND, OF +COURSE, BEING 13 YEARS OLD). + +---------------- +Setting aside the moral and legal issues of pirating software, there were +and are a lot of aspects to the sub-culture that are worth noting. When you +have a rough alliance of hundreds of people dealing in copying and +distributing commercial games, certain interesting conventions and issues +arose and continue to make themselves known. + +A major issue when trading in copied software is that people tend to just +take all the software being offered and not actually give anything back +in return. This process, often called "leeching" (and recently, +"freeloading") is a natural human tendency and efforts have been made +for decades to counterract it, with varying results. + +One solution that presented itself was the "Ratio", where people could only +download a certain amount of files before they were forced to upload. Ratios +could be somewhat lax, like requiring an upload for every 99 downloads (which +wasn't really a ratio at all) or extremely strict, like requiring one (or +two!) uploads for every download. + +Other variations have included "validation", where users could browse the site +and see what it had to offer, but they couldn't download any files or post +messages until they were given a higher level by the System Operator (SysOp). +On some sites, especially pirate boards, you might be required to fill out +an application to join, not unlike an exclusive school or club, which in some +ways this was. + +Obviously, if you knew the right people, you got everything anyway; this was +just a set of walls set up so that the principles of spreading files far and +wide were upheld, but a board wasn't completely taken advantage of. +---------------- + +REAL PIRATES REALIZE THAT PENGUIN AREN'T +REALLY "THE GRAPHICS PEOPLE". + +---------------- +Penguin Software (renamed after legal issues to "Polarware" in 1987) were +the creator of a number of graphics programs for the Apple II. Among their +more famous products were "The Graphics Magician" and a game called "The +Spy's Demise". They had a large number of game companies license graphics +routines from them, and they gave themselves the motto "The Graphics People". +Obviously, Rabid Rasta did not agree. +---------------- + +REAL PIRATES FEEL GUILTY WHEN PIRATING +BEAGLE BROTHERS. OF COURSE, THAT NEVER +STOPS THEM. + +------------ +Pirates would feel guilty about pirating Beagle Brothers because they were +one of several companies that took the risk of releasing their software with +absolutely no copy protection on it, and then imploring people to make the +best judgement and not make copies of their software except for backups. This +approach was also taken by Penguin Software, with similar success. + +Beagle Brothers were also reknown for making absolutely fantastic software; +they had a special talent for cramming as many goodies and hacks onto every +disk they sold. You might be buying a word processor or programming tips disk +and find a whole plethora of fascinating code buried within the disk as well. + +You could definitely feel bad about ripping off the Beagle Brothers. +------------ + +REAL PIRATES DON'T BELIEVE THE MORONS +WHO SAY THEY HAVE ULTIMA IV AND POLE +POSITION. + +------------ +In the modern day, where Ultima now means "Ultima Online", it should be +mentioned that the Ultima series by Lord British (Richard Garriott) was +created in 1980 for several platforms, including the Apple II. The object +of the game was to guide your player (named "Avatar") through a series of +adventures in the land of Britannia. Ultimately, there have been nine +Ultima Games (and then Ultima Online), with each new chapter over the last +20 years being more anticipated than the last. This game had a major cult +following even in its early years, and promises by pirates that they had +the next version of Ultima became a constant, shrill joke on BBSes. Ultima +III had been released in 1983, and this file was written in 1984. Ultima +IV did not make an appearance until 1985, although it was theoretically +possible that someone could have had an early copy of Ultima IV in 1984. +This was a very unlikely prospect, though. + +"Pole Position", the Namco-Produced Arcade Game that was licensed by Atari and +brought to the United Stated under their name, was in fact announced for the +Apple II by Atarisoft in April of 1984. This indicates that either Rabid Rasta +had assumed that Pole Position, an Atari game, would never come out for +non-Atari computers, or the file was written before April of that year. As +it turned out, however, Atari never did release Pole Position (although it +did release a number of other programs for the Apple II) and the program +joined the legion of "vaporware" that has accompanied the history of the +computer since its beginning. +------------ + +COROLLARY: REAL PIRATES REALIZE THAT +THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN FORMULA I +RACER AND POLE POSITION. + +------------ +I am unable to find any direct information about a game called "Formula I" +for the Apple II, but it wouldn't be that hard to assume that Formula I was +a racing game that, if one convinced oneself with great effort, might be +similar to Pole Position, minus the graphics and sound. +------------ + +BOARDS +------ +REAL PIRATES AREN'T THE FIFTH TO POST +THE SAME "I HAVE..." MESSAGE. + +CORROLARY: REAL PIRATES DON'T POST +"I HAVE..." MESSAGES WHEN THEY REALLY DON'T +HAVE. + +------------ +"Boards" in this case refer to message sub-boards, sections on a BBS that +are dedicated to one subject that users could post to. In this case, the +subject is trading games. + +The "I Have" messages being referenced here are messages that would be posted +on the "Trading" sub-board of a BBS, where users would announce what disks +or programs they had available, and others would send them mail asking to +trade for other programs. Messages that were just asking for programs were +"I Want" messages. + +In this way, BBSes provided a way for disparate groups of people to get +together to trade files, because otherwise things came down to the same +dozen disks within a social group. Alliances and friendships would be struck +over these trades. +------------ + +REAL PIRATES DON'T DOWNLOAD PROGRAMS +FROM PUBLIC AE'S AND THEN POST "I KNOW +IT'S OLD, BUT I HAVE...TOO" MESSAGES +ON PIRATE BOARDS. + +------------- +The term "AE" is used only twice in this file, It stands for "Ascii Express", +which was a terminal program for the Apple II that changed the face of +Apple II piracy forever. While the use-the-modem-to-connect-to-BBSes side +of the Ascii Express program was uneventful, it had a second feature, whereby +it could run as a sort of file server, allowing anyone who dialed in and +typed the password to browse the operator's disks. + +This changed everything. People could put up Ascii Express on their phone +lines with absolutely no difficulty or preparation, and just start offering +copies of programs out to anyone who called. Obviously they would also hope +that others would upload to their "AE Line" as well. + +AE Lines were among the best way to distribute files and disk images on a +previously-unknown scale, requiring only one of the two users involved in +the trade to do the work. This was also a situation where "cracks" into a +single file from a full disk worked to a great advantage, as a maximum amount +of programs could be made available on a single or double-disk system. +------------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T POST THEIR HIGH SCORES. + +COROLLARY: REAL PIRATES DON'T KEEP SCORE. + +REAL PIRATES DON'T SAY "K-K00L", +"K-AWESOME", "X10DER", "L8R0N", OR +ANYTHING OF THE SORT. + +REAL PIRATES KNOW THE DIFFERENCE BE- +TWEEN "F" AND "PH" (I.E."PHILES", +"PHUCK", "FONE", ETC.). + +-------------- +The use of the spelling "fone" for "telephone" stems back from the days of +the Technological Assistance Party (or Youth International Party Line), +which preceeded 2600 magazine in bringing deep-hidden secrets about the +phone company (the once-invincible Ma Bell) to an eager audience. There is +a very good likelihood that this F-PH switching goes back to the 60's and +even beyond; people who really got into the technology of the phone company +might be referred to as "freaks", and it would be a logical step that they +would playfully call themselves "Phone Phreaks". It's known that Phone +Phreaking started at least as far back as the 1950's, but compared to today's +level of organization within this sub-culture, it was probably a very +loosely-knit and disparate group of people who took the term to refer to +themselves, possibly independent of each other. + +(The History of Phone Phreaks and Phreaking in general is far beyond the +scope of this file, but is a subject worth exploring. A number of books +have gone into more recent groups of Phone Phreaks, and they make an +excellent start for the historian trying to understand this fascinating +culture.) + +It is entirely a guess on my part, but made from observation of hundreds +of textfiles, that the "K-" prefix is an abbreviation for "OK," as in +"OK, Cool" becoming "K-Kool". This quickly mutated into forms for "K-Rad", +"K-Awesome", and the like. + +The origins of the word "OK" itself comes from an abbreviation fad in +the late 1830s, where it stood for "Oll Korrect", and was part of a family +of silly abbreviations that newspapers were using at the time. This +abbreviation was later grabbed by Martin "Old Kinderhook" Van Buren in +his presidential campaign, and it fell into common use some time later as +a result of that publicity. So, one could argue that "K-Rad" has a history +of more than a century and a half, which is both breathtaking and depressing +in one swoop. + +Finally, the use of 1 for "I", "0" for "O" and the like are traditions +going very far back and are also worthy of a treatise in themselves. There +is a belief that these alternate spellings are the result of a Usenet +phenomenon called "B1FF", but "B1FF" was created by Joe Talmadge in 1988, +and is in fact an homage to the already-existent spellings that were on BBSes +for years before. +-------------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T WASTE EVERYONE'S TIME +BACKSPACING OVER THEIR ALIAS 50 TIMES. + +COROLLARY: REAL PIRATES DON'T USE +BACKSPACING IN FEEDBACK TO SYSOPS. +(SYSOPS DON'T READ FEEDBACK AT 300 BAUD) + +------------- +This was the reference that first inspired me to write this file; the concept +of "backspacing" is almost completely lost in the modern world, where DSL and +cable modems can download at the rate of an entire Apple II disk in a SECOND. + +This is far past the concept of "baud" as a speed measurement; we now use +kilobits or kilobytes per second, instead of thinking of something as 128,000 +baud or the like. A good percentage of the country in this new century can +connect at between 33,600 baud and 56,000 baud. But once, the best you could +do was 300. + +In the era of 300 baud, text would crawl along the screen; it was very +possible for a talented typist to type as fast as 300 baud, and reading at +that speed was just as easy. This meant that the BBS experience, when you +weren't downloading a file, was a matter of watching the cursor leak across +the screen, line by line, sentence by sentence. This could be very exciting +or extremely boring, depending on what was happening at the time. For example, +typing "?" for a menu at the BBS prompt when you meant to type something else +would mean another 15-30 seconds sucked out of your life. + +Besides all the standard alphanumeric characters, some BBS programs would +let you enter unusual key sequences in your keyboard to add deletes or cursor +moves to your message. + +Imagine, then, that when signing your name, for extra emphasis, you enter +it into the message system like this: + +THE WYVERN + +WYVERN + +...and so on. What anyone reading your message at 300 baud would see, as +they got to the end of your message, was your name, and then the name +reversing and erasing itself, and then the name appearing again. This little +text trick would give your name a sort of shimmer, and then the message +would be finished. + +Obviously, if someone mistyped as they entered these sequences, it would leave +half-finished lines and words scattered throughout their message, which was +an unintentional joke in itself. + +A more involved concept was the spinning cursor, where you would add a +sequence to look like a spinning line after your name: + +-\|/- + +As the message constantly printed characters and then deletes, it would look +a little like a line spinning in place. (Trust me on this.) A remnant of this +trick exists in the boot-up sequence of Sun Microsystem's Solaris Operating +System, where the cursor spins for you, like the old days, as your system +loads. + +The tricks and oddities of backspaces began to fade with 1200 baud, where +they would spin ludicrously fast, and came to a complete death with 2400 and +9600 baud, where you couldn't make out what was being done. And as Rabid +Rasta indicates, reading these messages locally (on the same computer as +the BBS, which the System Operator would be) was an exercise in frustation +as these little keyboard tricks made the screen a mess. + +"Feedback", by the way, was the general term for messages sent directly to +the System Operator, or Sysop. +------------- + +REAL PIRATES NEVER USE TEXT GRAPHICS IN +THEIR MESSAGES. + +------------- +Text Graphics sounds like an oxymoron, but it's the use of text characters +in a message or textfile to look more like a pictogram than just letters. +To illustrate, I'll point to the signature of the great Count Nibble: + +/\/oo\/\ Count Nibble /\/oo\/\ + +Obviously, as time has gone on text graphics have gotten much more +elaborate, and a small "ASCII Scene" still exists wherein different groups +of text artists try to outdo themselves and others with 'Art Packs' of +collected works. +------------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T CARE ABOUT THE CURSE +BBS'S "K-K00L M0DS". + +------------- +The idea of "Mods" is explained in further detail a few paragraphs below, +after the description of GBBS software. The Curse BBS appears to be a +BBS that has implemented a very large amount of "Mods", none of which, +in Rabid Rasta's mind, have improved the quality of the Board itself. +There was a Curse BBS which hosted Hot Rod of the Black Bag Apple pirate +group, located in Minnesota, and is very likely the BBS Rabid Rasta is +referring to. +------------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T SEARCH FOR NEW WAYS +TO SPELL "WARES". + +------------- +Regardless, this search has continued to this day, nearly two decades later. +------------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T USE THE LAST 5 LINES +OF THEIR MESSAGES BRAGGING ABOUT THE 8 +MEANINGLESS ORGANIZATIONS THAT THEY BELONG TO. + +COROLLARY: REAL PIRATES DON'T BELONG +TO SWAPP, DOS/NPG, OR NASCOMP. + +------------ +Rabid Rasta is referring to the interesting situation of "Pirate Groups", +which were (usually short-lived) clubs consisting of pirates, who would +brand all the releases and text by its members. Some groups have survived +over a decade, but most barely made it past the first couple of months. + +Sadly, SWAPP, DOS/NPG, and NASCOMP have all faded into obscurity, leaving +very little trace of their existence beyond Rabid Rasta's mention. Ironically, +Rabid Rasta helped these organizations to perpetuate their names for +decades be giving them as examples of groups not worth being a part of. + +NPG very likely stands for "New Pirates' Guild". A good number of "Guilds", +"Brotherhoods", "Societies", "Alliances" and "Exchanges" existed, containing +groups of youths who either knew each other in person, or only through BBSes. +Some groups might actually acquire software (by working at computer stores +or even at some development firms) and then make it available to the public, +while others would simply take what was already out and being traded and put +their own names on it. +------------- + +REAL PIRATES WHO ARE GBBS SYSOPS ARE +PROUD TO HAVE STOLEN FROM GREG SCHAEFER. + +------------- +It's not entirely clear why one would be proud to steal software from Greg +Schaefer in particular; perhaps Rabid Rasta is simply saying that someone who +would write this software is deserving of being stolen from. I've been +informed that Greg Shaefer was particularly anti-piracy and spoke out against +it; but it's not clear if Rabid Rasta knew this. + +GBBS was one of several BBS programs for the Apple II that came out in the +early 1980's; it was popular because of its easy setup, and more importantly, +that it was partially written in BASIC, allowing people to make all sorts of +modifications, or "mods", to the software. The subculture of "mods" is an +entire chapter in itself; suffice to say that many budding SysOps would make +many good (and bad) modifications to their BBS software to try and get more +users. + +For his part, Mr. Schaefer never lost his interest in the Apple II: In the +late 1980's, working for InSync software, he created "Proterm", an Apple II +telecommunications program still for sale in the present day. InSync changed +its name to InTrec software and created a version of Proterm for the Apple +Macintosh. +------------- + +REAL PIRATES ARE SATISFIED WITH ONE +EXCLAMATION POINT. + +------------- +This belief has continued through to today; putting many exclamation points +after your statements (I HAVE INCREDIBLE NEWS!!!!!!!!) impresses no-one and +makes the person writing it seem overly excitable and perhaps a bit flaky. + +One off-shoot of this bad habit should be mentioned: If you are typing a lot +of exclamation points and your hand comes off the shift key for a moment +(perhaps because you're an excitable youth who is typing something too +quickly), then you suddenly put a "1" down instead of a "!". Hence, there are +many, many references in many textfiles of the era to losers or other +undesirables writing things like: + +I HAVE INCREDIBLE WAREZ TO TRADE!!!11!!!!!1!!!!1! + +This quickly became an in-joke among the "elite" of BBSes, to show how far +they'd come, by acting like they hadn't come anywhere at all, in an ironic +fashion. +-------------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T CALL DIAL-YOUR- +MATCH. + +-------------- +Dial-Your-Match (or DYM) was a BBS program that had many of the standard +features of Bulletin Boards, that is, message bases, private e-mail (within +the userbase of the board) and file sections. + +But its key feature was a questionaire that you were required to fill out, +asking you all sorts of personal questions (many of which were configurable +by the BBS operator). Having filled out this questionaire, you could then +choose to see who else on the BBS you were a great "match" with. + +Assuming you found someone who was very compatible with you, you could +elect to send them e-mail or arrange for a date. The prospect of using the +computer to meet people was apparently a popular one, because Dial-Your-Match +BBSes flourished in the early 1980s. + +This was a particularly interesting piece of software because the BBS world +was extremely male-dominated, and many times there would be 200+ male users +vying for the attention of less than a dozen female users. If they were in +fact female users. It must have been a unique experience for all involved. +-------------- + +REAL PIRATES NEVER GET INTO "BITCH WARS" +UNLESS, OF COURSE, THEY ARE GRINDING +SOME 13 YEAR OLD TI USER INTO THE DUST. + +TRANSFERS +--------- + +REAL PIRATES DON'T DFX. + +REAL PIRATES NO LONGER BUY MICROMODEM +II'S, SSM MODEMCARDS, OR NETWORKER +MODEMS. + +COROLLARY: REAL PIRATES BUY APPLE CATS. + +------------ +"Bitch Wars" are more often known as "Flame Wars", where two people, shielded +from each other via keyboard and modem, begin to harass and insult each other +way beyond the normal course of human conversation. After a while, these +attacks were entertaining enough for others that some BBSes specifically +created sub-boards (discussion groups) called "Bitch Boards" or "Bitchwar +Boards" that users were invited to start vicious debates on. + +"TI User" means someone who owned a Texas Instruments 99/4A. This ill-fated +entry into the personal computer market, while in some ways a relatively +powerful and worthwhile machine, was itself ground into the dust when Texas +Instruments insisted on controlling all distribution of software for it +and demanded licensing fees for the rights to make cartridges or sell +programs for it. After they began litigating several companies that had +ignored this admonition, support dried up and TI exited from the business. +Ironically, this caused a massive dumping of TI 99/4A machines into the +market, which gained a large and ready audience happy to grab a personal +computer and peripherals for less than $200. A small boom occured afterwards +in software for the machine, but it never got away from its constrictive, +cheap reputation. + +If there was the slightest doubt that this file is Apple-Centric, it's all +dispelled by the time Rabid Rasta starts discussing file transfers via modem. +He quickly mentions a good portion of the competing Apple modem hardware +available in 1984. + +The Hayes Micromodem II was created by the Hayes corporation, which had +started the home computer modem market in 1977 with the creation of a +modem for the S-100 bus, and soon after the Apple II. The Micromodem II's +speed was 110 baud and 300 baud. + +In fact, it appears that Rabid Rasta is referring to a group of 300 baud +modems that had been out on the market for a while. The SSM Modemcard was +also 110/300 baud, as was the Zoom Telephonics Networker. + +The Novation Apple Cat, on the other hand, was one of those pieces of +hardware that sounds almost too good to be true. Created by Novation, Inc. +to be a powerful and flexible modem, it soon turned out to be VERY +powerful and ALL TOO flexible for some tastes. It was possible to have +two 300 baud Apple Cats communicate with each other and work at 1200 +baud. The Apple Cat's tone generators were programmable and it was +possible to program the modem to do four-part music down the phone +line. The ability to recognize tones coming down the phone line meant +the "Cat" could know if it was getting a fast busy, slow bust, disconnect +message, or a ring; besides the advantages of knowing to a better extent +what was wrong with the BBS you were calling, the modem could take +your voice if you spoke through it and modify it as you spoke. Needless +to say, this was one incredible piece of technology. + +As for Real Pirates and "DFX": DFX is short for "DOS File Exchange", a +program written in 1982 by Blacksmith of Arrow Micro Software. This was a +terminal program that allowed users to transfer DOS 3.3 disks using the +Micromodem II. This program also allowed users to chat at the same time +that these disk images were being transferred. One can infer that the +adherence to the inferior Micromodem II as opposed to the Apple Cat Modem +insured that this program was not the choice of "Real" Pirates. +------------ + +COROLLARY TO THE COROLLARY: REAL PI- +RATES ACCEPT THE REALITY THAT 300 BAUD +IS DEAD. + +------------ +Of all the battles that were fought over status, none were as clearly defined +along cost lines than the baud wars. + +300 baud, the standard for modems, in the early 1960's, had been around since +the late 1960's. But with the demand for faster speeds from the growing home +computer market, 1200 baud modems started to proliferate. + +It's somewhat difficult to put down a time to say "At this year, 1200 baud +modems were introduced to consumers." In fact, 2400 baud modems were +available as early as 1982-3, but they cost in the range of $500, well +beyond the means of many families. 300 baud modems at the same time, +however, were in the $100 range. Prices varied wildly, and under any +circumstance it was hard to justify to parents the added advantage of +a 1200 baud modem that could be in the range of $300. + +This led some desperate types to start dabbling in credit card fraud, to be +able to acquire the hardware needed to stay ahead of the curve. Credit card +fraud, incidentally, was often what brought down a BBS or AE Line, more +than having pirated games; once you started going into the thousands of +dollars of fraudulently acquired hardware, you got the attention of some +pretty heavy law enforcement. + +In 1984, the price had started to come down enough for 1200 baud to +proliferate, but 300 baud modems could still be seen. Since the faster speed +was available, there came into place the "1200 only" board, that would no +longer allow collections from the lower speeds. When 2400 proliferated, +"2400 only" started to appear. + +To some extent, this elitism on the part of pirates was understandable; with +the process of transferring floppies taking beyond an hour for 300 baud +users and time being cut to 25 percent for 1200 baud users, this meant more +distribution, more users, and more uploads. +------------ + +REAL PIRATES AREN'T AROUND TO TRADE ON +FRIDAY OR SATURDAY NIGHTS. + +COROLLARY: REAL PIRATES HAVEN'T +WATCHED LOVE BOAT SINCE THEY WERE 13. + +------------ +The "Love Boat" Television Series on ABC ran from 1977 until 1986, so when +this file was written there were still two more excruciating years to go. +The reference in this case is that "Love Boat" ran on Saturday nights, +meaning if you were watching Love Boat, you were not exactly having a +real exciting party or social life. +------------ + +REAL PIRATES TYPE "BRUN AE" WITHOUT +THE SPACEBAR IN BETWEEN. + +------------ +A rather obscure reference to a parsing trick on Apple IIs where only the +first 4 letters of a keyword (internal command) were looked at, and you +could put the next piece of information (the filename) right after the +4 letters, with no space. For example, LOADPROGRAM was the same as typing +LOAD PROGRAM. In this case, typing BRUNAE is the same as typing BRUN AE. + +AE is the filename for the aforementioned ASCII Express telecommunications +program, one of the most popular modem programs on the Apple II. "BRUN" is +a command that means "Binary Run", as opposed to RUN, which means "Run this +text program". There were similar differences in the commands for LOAD/BLOAD. + +Perhaps in conjunction with other learned shortcuts, it would be impressive +to see someone typing the absolute least amount of commands to get the job +done. Or maybe this is just meant to be a quick showoff, to demonstrate +that Rabid Rasta knows all the right moves. +------------ + +REAL PIRATES CAN GET DISKFER/CATSEND +TO WORK RIGHT THE FIRST TIME. + +--------------- +Catsend and Diskfer were one of a legion of programs written to support the +Novation Apple Cat modem. In this case, these two programs were meant to +make disk distribution much easier. + +To understand what need they were filling, it helps to know that terminal +software usually geared itself towards the transfer of individual files and +then only as a side feature for the program, not as its main driving force. +Telecommunications programs also tended to be more general purpose, and not +designed to work with specific modems. The Apple Cat programs, meanwhile, +only worked with one specific modem, and as previously discussed, a powerful +modem indeed. + +"Diskfer", written by The Redheaded Freak, Checksum, and The Black Hole of +the Independents, greatly optimized the process of sending floppies by +allowing the automation of sending an entire disk. It was actually possible +to set up a session where two disks on the sending machine were being +recieved at the same time on the destination machine. This sped up the +process greatly. + +CatFur, by the Night Owl and the Micron, was a similar sort of disk transfer +program as well, although it had a different set of features. It included a +utility to set all unused portions of a disk to $00 (Null) so that the disk +would compress to a greater degree, making a major difference in a 300 baud +transfer. It also had an "unattended" mode that functioned very similarly to +Ascii Express. + +What this meant, was that you could set your Apple up as an optimized disk +disk distribution node, and others (running the right program) would then +be able to get full copies of your offered disks, unattended, with the +machines closing down after they were done. This was especially useful if you +were doing your transfers on your parents' phone line late at night and +wanted the lines clear the next morning. +--------------- + +CONCLUSION +---------- + +THAT'S IT...FOR NOW. SINCE LOSERS IN- +VENT NEW WAYS TO BE LOSERS EVERY DAY, +EXPECT A "REAL PIRATE'S GUIDE, VOLUME +2" VERY SOON. + +--------------- +A "Real Pirate's Guide Part 2" did make an appearance (as well as Parts 3, 4, +and the dozens of other "Real" files) but it was not written by Rabid Rasta. +It's mentioned in the Real Pirate's Guide Volume Two that Rabid Rasta had +gone off to college, which indicates that his age at the time of writing this +file was between 17 and 19. Unfortunately, this is only a guess. +--------------- + +IF ANY OF YOU WERE TERRIBLY OFFENDED +BY ANYTHING IN THIS FILE, THAT'S YOUR +CLUE TO RETIRE FROM THE PIRATE WORLD. +AFTER ALL, REAL PIRATES DON'T GET +OFFENDED BY THINGS WRITTEN IN +TEXTFILES. + +THANKS TO THE FOLLOWING FOR THEIR +CONTRIBUTIONS TO THIS FILE: + +OTTO SHINEFLUG, CTRL RESET, +BIT O'NASTY, LORD CHAOS, +NILONIEL I, AND WHATEVER +CON MAN CALLS HIMSELF OUT OF STATE. + +-------------- +CTRL RESET was the author of The Real Pirate's Guide Volume Two. He claimed +to have worked closely with Rabid Rasta on this file, which might have meant +a number of suggestions for rules and corollaries. The second file, suffering +from the same problems that many sequels do, uses many of the same jokes and +follows the same formula. + +The other names mentioned don't show up in my research, probably because they +posted no files of their own. This actually happened a lot; people would join +a BBS because they thought it was a fun place to play around in, and they +would be asked for a handle. They'd put down whatever silly name they wanted, +and posted a few messages under that name, and maybe hung out with other +friends on and off the BBS who used handles, and that was that. It was only +those who then took those handles and created textfiles or programs with +them that have had their names persist to this day. +-------------- + +(C)1984 RABID RASTA; +UBANGI JUNGLE PUBLISHING + +-------------- +The Ubangi is a river in Africa, roughly 1,400 miles long, that is formed +by the union of the Mbomu and Uele rivers, and is the main northern tributary +of the Congo. What this might have to do with a textfile writing group is +left up to the reader. + +Some Final Notes; + +No person directly associated with the Real Pirate's Guide was consulted +in the creation of this file, meaning that there might always be alternative +and completely viable explanations for why things were written the way they +were. However, I have taken my best educated guesses based on the information +and research available to me. The purpose of this document was to give +context and hopefully get some history right; history is a funny thing, and +can be radically different based on who you're interacting with at that +moment. It would be a wonderful thing if someone associated with this file +would speak up and let their side of the story be heard. + +The story of OK was based on the work of Professor Allen Walker Read, +and is gone into a more helpful and simpler detail in a book by Cecil +Adams called "More of the Straight Dope", where I picked it up. If +etymology is of great interest to you, you will find the story of OK +to be fascinating indeed. + +The clarification of B1FF comes from several sources, notably the Hacker +Jargon File, edited by Eric S. Raymond among others, and from several +messages posted on Usenet about the date of B1FF's arrival. + +While I knew in my mind that the Novation Apple Cat modem was powerful and +could do many magic things (I still remember the night in 1986 that +someone played "The Entertainer" to me over the phone with it), it was +the web page of James W. Abendschan that allowed me to easily recount +some of the specific tricks it was capable of. + +Information about different gaming companies came from many sources, including +the remaining home pages of the companies under their new ownership, but one +other source that shone brightly was the Giant List of Classic Game +Programmers, maintained by James Hague, which allowed me to determine what +company manufactured a given game. +--------------- diff --git a/textfiles.com/100/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/100/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6ff123f8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/100/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,128 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Jason Scott's Top 100 Textfiles

+

+It's perfectly understandable that someone finding textfiles.com for the first +time wouldn't be interested in sifting through thousands of textfiles to get an +idea of what the site is about. For this reason, I've selected a "best of" +collection of one hundred textfiles that I think capture the spirit of this site +and the unique culture that it attempts to preserve.

+While in many cases, there are slicker or longer examples of these files, I felt +that these specific examples best captured the genre they belonged to. I invite +you to browse through this section, read up, and if you find something that +intrigues you, to read more about it in the bulk of the site. +

+These files are arranged alphabetically, not in any order of importance. +

+ + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
914bbs.txt 3968
 914 Area Code BBS List, by Dan Gelman (January 15, 1984)
A snapshot of the typical BBSes you might find in an area code, in this case, mine. A good portion of the "General" boards you see listed were in fact Phreak or Pirate boards. Keeping an active account on all your local systems could be quite time-consuming.
  +
actung.hum 332
 Relaxen und watch das blinkenlights...
This sort of small, quaint humor file could be found lurking across many different kinds of BBSes and mainframes. Origin: Unknown, although it very likely could date back to the 60's or 70's.
  +
ad.txt 1664
 Call The Upside Down BBS!
A typical "Tag File" for a Bulletin Board System, in this case a classic Apple II with 64k of memory. To entice you over, the BBS offers you everything up to and including the two floppy disks located in the floppy drives. Besides being an interesting approach for a BBS ad, this short file also shows the variety of devices you could hook to an Apple II, including devices you could hook to other devices.
  +
adventur.txt 7758
 Adventure: Solving it in Easy Steps, by The Rom Raider and Doctor Digital
Don't read this file if you haven't played Crowther and Wood's original classic "Adventure"! This file is a solid example of a "Walk-through", where the goal was to present an easy, no-thinking solution to the classic thinking person's game: text adventures. While these games could present hours (or days or weeks) of fun trying to solve the puzzles and pitfalls, many people were content to just be given the answer and go through the game blindly, watching as every step they made was the exact right one. To a smaller degree, there was a constant one-upsmanship with Walkthroughs, where whoever could come out with the "solve" for a game the soonest after it was released (or even before) was the King of the Hill.
  +
angela.art 6656
 ASCII Art of "Angela"
A solid, classic example of an ASCII Nude, brimming with joy and text-based sexiness. Some of these were hand-drawn, while others used primitive digitizers and software that translated graphics to text to give surprisingly realistic photos when seen from a distance. Naturally, these files were a hot trade online.
  +
anonymit 34657
 The Joy of Handles, by Mahatma Kane Jeeves and David Lescohier
This series of articles attacks the issue of anonymity and handles from a completely different set of perspectives; that is, the protection of the writer from general harassment and investigation, and not necessarily that of promoting unwelcome or illegal ideas. An informative read.
  +
applemaf.hum 21388
 The Apple Mafia Story, as told to Red Ghost, 1986
This interesting insight into the comings and goings of the Apple piracy world of the early-mid 80's shows the battle between the older class of pirates and the new breed of "r0dentz" that has been waged for the last 20 years. This file also gives a history (and hardware list) of the Sherwood Forest BBSes, which were among my all-time favorite boards, and probably a pretty darn influential force in the world that textfiles.com presents.
  +
apples.txt 8960
 Typical Apple Piracy Message Base, circa 1984
This pristine capture of a 14-message apple "warez" message base shows a gamut of user types converging in one place to trade boasts, information, and programs. From Sherlock Apple's boast of "I have em all!!!!!!" to Creative Cracker and Key Master's BBS ads, you can see how these places became hotbeds of activity and information. Key master and I traded textfiles back then; I thought nothing of calling a BBS called "The 4th Reich".
  +
arttext.fun 4020
 The Art of Writing Textfiles, by The Bronze Rider
Bronze rider weighs in with his opinions on how to write proper textfiles, probably in response to some lack of quality in files up to that point. (This file is incomplete for the moment, but you'll get the idea.)
  +
b00g!.hum 6623
 B00g and the Art of Zen, by Anarchy Incorporated
This file started a weird "b00g" craze that perpetuated itself for a number of years across a lot of BBSes that I was on/involved in. Then again, Anarchy Inc. was one of those groups you could depend on for some really excellent writing no matter what the subject was about.
  +
balls.txt 2845
 Mouse Balls Available as a Field Replacement Unit
A classic example of a somewhat plausible file making the rounds for years and years. This likely-true file discussing how to wash the balls from Computer Mice took on a life of its own and still shows up occasionally. Surely a giggle, if not a guffaw.
  +
basicom4.phk 17717
 Bioc Agent's Telecommunications Series, Part IV
BIOC Agent 003 was one of those rare phone phreaks who could both assimilate information around him and present it in a well-written, forthright manner. Often, many of the phreaking textfiles of the time were poorly written, hastily formatted, and lacking in any perspective beyond how to break or get freebies from a computer or network. Bioc got a lot of attention with his clear writing and informative series "The Basics of Telecommunications", which appeared in the summer of 1984. This example from the series, part 4 (of 7) covered both the hierarchy and electronic network of the Bell Telephone System. Groundbreaking.
  +
basicom5.phk 18867
 Bioc Agent's Telecommunications Series, Part V
Another example of BIOC's writing in the Basics of Telecommunications Series, this section dealt entirely with the basic telephone, including the wiring and the electronic aspects. Notably, BIOC gives a bibliography where he got a lot of his information (something pretty much not done beforehand) and additionally covers the theory of operation of the infamous "Black Box", as well. Excellent.
  +
bbsdeath.pro 7639
 Whatever Happened to REAL Bulletin-Board Systems?
What strikes me about this file was that it was written around 1982 and decries how out-of-touch, vicious, and impersonal the BBS world has grown for the writer. Note the interesting reasons he gives for the downturn of BBS's.
  +
bc760mod.ham 1408
 Modification of the Uniden Bearcat BC950XLT for Cellular Frequencies, by John Stover (March 29, 1988)
The problem was major: Cellular phones could be listened to by any ham radio scanner being made. The normal solution: Produce better cell phones, that did a better job of encrypting/scrambling transmissions. The solution the government took: Force all creators of any ham radio scanners to remove the capability of ham radios to listen to the frequencies chosen for the cellular phones. Naturally, the companies did this in the cheapest way possible, often just running a short-circuiting wire such that attempts to go to those frequencies would be unsuccessful. And naturally, files such as this one made themselves available, where you were told how to take out that wire and restore the machine to full functionality. Was the point to listen in on people? No. The point was crippling technology to hide things from people flies in the face of the spirit of technology. 5 short lines, and the efforts from the unknowing are thwarted. The power of textfiles.
  +
beefstar.hum 2965
 "Hey how much for someone to, you know, screw with the beef?"
This is the only beef pornography I've ever seen. Sexual Surrealism at its best.
  +
bhbb1.hac 9837
 Better Homes and Blue Boxing, Part I, by Mark Tabas (January 7, 1985)
Mark Tabas came along in 1985 and wrote a series of chatty, friendly files about all the fun you could have with the mysterious Blue Box, the most famous of all the Phreak Boxes that rose out of the 1970's and 1980's. This box, when used in conjunction with a 2600hz tone across a phone line, allowed you to seize control a telephone line as if you were an operator and do all sorts of neat, crazy stuff. By 1985 these boxes were becoming obsolete (with the advent of Electronic Switching System, or ESS) but this file harkens back to this interesting era. A sign of the great works LOD would create for the next decade.
  +
billrights.fun 3746
 The Bill of Rights "Lite", by John Perry Barlow
This re-tooled Bill of Rights, rephrased to reflect most of the constitutional issues arising in cyberspace and in general everyday life, hit the nail on the head as to how far the government had strayed from its original plan. Barlow, a co-founder of the Electronic Freedom Foundation, makes his beliefs about the modern world known in just a couple screenfuls of slashed-up constitutional law.
  +
black.box 4460
 To All Who Dare -- The Black Box
For many people, this simple little text file was the opening door into the world of the Phone Phreak, a world where a simple application of technology meant a subversion of the great and powerful Bell System. In this case, the Black Box would convince the telephone company that your phone was still ringing, even though you'd picked the phone up and were chatting happily through the buzzing rings. With its name owing to the 1970's era "Blue Box", the Black Box was the final spark to ignite a stream of steady "box" files, each one a more flamboyant and wild color and each promising the world.
  +
bofh.1 3854
 The Bastard Operator From Hell #1, by Simon Travaglia
As the BBS kids of the world grew into full-fledged System Operators, they found that no textfile out there caught the frustrations and issues of a computer hacker saddled with responsibility more than the BOFH (Bastard Operator from Hell) series. Stretching through many files and continuing to this day as a magazine column, these textfiles set out an alternate-world Simon the Sysadmin who would torture and ruin his users in the pursuit of more free time and lager. The initials BOFH have become one of the better-kept inside jokes of the System Admin trade, and these files have become immortal.
  +
cDc-0200.txt 124155
 The cDc #200 Higgledy-Piggledy-Big-Fat-Henacious-Mega-Mackadocious You-Can't-Even-Come-Close-So-Jump-Back-K-BOOMIDY-BOOMIDY-BOOM File, by Swamp Ratte'
The Cult of the Dead Cow continues to be a prominent force in the online world, but when they started in the late 1980's they were just another text-file writing group, copying heavy metal lyrics and printing bomb ingredient lists. Swamp Ratte's perseverance and leadership caused cDc to break out of that mode, however, and by the time they'd released their 200th textfile (In December of 1992) they'd been around for over 6 years, forever by BBS standards. To celebrate, Swamp Ratte' wrote this file, which I consider to be an all-time classic not only because of the dead-on parodies of the BBS world of the 1980's that run through it, but for the way these parodies perfectly capture a lot of the cultural forces that ran through that time. (The warez vs. textfiles debate, the self-aggrandizement of older hackers, the completely bizzare spelling styles, etc.) This file truly goes above and beyond in every way. A great reference file to see if you can get all the jokes when reading other files here.
  +
captain.phk 2759
 An Apple for the Captain, by Steven Wozniak (October 1, 1984)
BIOC Agent 003 transcribes an Infoworld article that mentions a funny story about Captain Crunch (John Draper), an employee of Apple, reprogramming an Apple II so that it would dial up PBX lines to get free phone codes. In a few short paragraphs, Steven Wozniak describes Phone Phreaking with an innocent sense of fun and exploration, using common technology.
  +
captmidn.txt 24394
 The Story of Captain Midnight
This textfile, source unknown, tells the story of Captain Midnight, a lone satellite operator who overrode HBO's signal with a warning against charging $12.95 a month and scrambling their signal. This sudden seizure of the HBO signal caught the media (and the government)'s attention, and he was soon caught. This textfile saves the memory of a fellow who took matters into his own hands, and blew out a showing of Pee Wee's Big Adventure as a bonus.
  +
catstuff.app 9818
 Expanding Your Apple Cat II, by The Ware-Wolf
The Novation Apple Cat Modem was one of those pieces of technology that you just can't believe ever got out into the market, and which stands as a straight example of the creativity that lives in this world. Built simply to be a flexible modem, this piece of technology contained 4 digital to analogue converters and several other unexpected ports and switches that caused it to be used as a clock, answering machine/voice mailbox, hold button, voice changer, and music player. Simply put, this modem was beyond belief. This textfile helps show some of the amazing modifications to this modem that were devised by its users.
  +
codegeek.txt 20841
 Robert Hayden's Code of the Geeks v1.01
The Geek Code is one of those bizzare Internet-only phenomenons that would only rise up among a culture dominated by the intelligensia: a code that, through an application of letters with plus or minus modifications, would indicate the hobbies, desires, or public aspects of that person, easily machine-readable, but to anyone who didn't know the code, completely indecipherable.
  +
copyprot.pro 11392
 Copy Protection: A History and Outlook
Dt writes a quick overview (intended for publication, and therefore a little more balanced than it normally would have been) about the history of copy protection and some of the methods used on both sides in the war over software.
  +
crossbow 29200
 From Crossbows to Cryptography: Thwarting the State Via Technology
Chuck Hammill of the Libertech Project comes out with a jaw-dropping defense of technology as a liberating force, through the use of cryptography and communication, and applies it to his (cynical) view of history and the nature of Governments. A speech given at the Future of Freedom Conference that is at once balanced, intruiging, revolutionary, bitter, hopeful, and inspiring. All around, ahead of its time and relevant to this very minute.
  +
dec.wars 31839
 DEC WARS: The Continuing Saga of the Adventures of Luke Vaxhacker
One of the earlier and one of the best cross-cultural fan fiction files, combining the world of Digital's VAX series of computers with the Star Wars movies. Peppered throughout this file, tons of inside VAX jokes combine with Star Wars references, making it one of the geekiest, nerdiest files you could come across online. This genre has exploded out of control since then, but at the time, it was something really new, and a ton of fun.
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diskgone.ana 627
 When He Boots It, It Boots Him! From Ziggy Stardust
This explosive device sticks in the mind because of both the pure nastiness of the situation (booby trapping a floppy disk to turn it into a bomb) and the reason given for a person to risk someone else's life: they didn't trade pirated programs honestly.
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dodontae.hum 9385
 The Do's and Don'ts of Ascii Express, by Quasimoto
The story of Ascii Express is one of a telecommunications company adding a small feature to allow remote downloads, that spread into a massive underground network of pirated applications throughout the Apple II community. These "AE Lines" provided quick, simple access to other floppy drives across the country, and became a subculture all their own. This file purports to give some suggested etiquette for AE lines, only to be deflated quite humorously by Count Nibble at the end.
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easymony.ana 6709
 A Guide to Easy Money, by The Flash (January 4, 1986)
Even a cursory read of this file shows that the Flash knew not one molecule of what he was talking about. This complete lack of knowledge in the dark arts of Street Economy obviously didn't stop him from publishing a series of files on how to succeed in them. At this no-man's land between fact and fantasy, you get a great insight into the author's idea of how the world works, and how easy he thought the world of crime was. (Ostensibly, the Flash has gone on to a nice, quiet life somewhere.)
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eatingmsh.drg 2028
 Can You Put Psychedelic Mushrooms on Pizza?
A pretty funny example from a Usenet posting in alt.drugs. Somehow, I can imagine this happening. And oh, he's the MANAGER! While a lot of drug files tend to be boring chemical lists or long and drawn-out philosophical discussions, this file makes you think twice about who's working the cash register.
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eel_bye.txt 7680
 The Eel Says Goodbye to the Pirate World
What really strikes me about The Eel's farewell to the piracy world of 1992 is that while he says that one of his primary motivations for leaving is his current circle of "real" friends, the rest of the file goes to show he has dozens of other "real" friends as well. No doubt in the years after his break away from life on the modem he's built even more circles of friends, but one can't help wondering if he doesn't read this file and think of what else he threw away besides his collection of "warez".
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elite.cmd 5946
 The Elite Commandments
As the word "Elite" came to be bandied about in BBSes, people started to separate themselves between the "Elite" and "Unelite". Specifically, this was just another way to look down on others based on completely arbitrary, meaningless reasons. This file skewers that attitude in a list of "commandments" that best represent the mindset of the self-named "elite". As a bonus, several inside jokes from the era are presented in a "gossip weekly" parody at the end.
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elites.txt 3113
 Someone Completely Blows Up
A young BBS user (I don't know where this came from) suddenly begins ranting about everything that bothers him about being on BBSes. His complaints take on a heartwarming quirkiness, looking back.
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ethics.txt 8140
 Ethics for BBS Users
A well-written, nicely-formatted, completely pedantic file that lectures you on every aspect of being a BBS user. This file was part of a trend of Sysops explaining to users how great they had it for having BBSes to call, and to appreciate the work behind them. They were rarely successful, but you do what you can. The invitation to download the file and display it on other BBSes meant that some new users would be subjected to this file automatically. The "wearing a tie to school" side of the BBS world.
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famous.bug 52609
 Famous Computer Bugs, compiled by Dave Curry and John Shore
This ARPAnet-compiled lists of computer glitches through history shows some wonderful perspective on disasters and screw-ups through history (mostly the 60's and 70's) and shows you the interesting vulnerabilities that have cropped up over time. Some of them, such as a probe suddenly losing contact with earth, are scarily sobering, but others, such as the Multics bug (the swapper-out process would swap out the swapper-in process!) make you just want to snort, assuming you snort at that sort of thing. Geeky, and cute.
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feh-1 54625
 Fuckin' Eleet Haxor Issue #1, July 1st 1995
As the World Wide Web really started to take hold in the middle of the 1990s, textfiles became a rarer and rarer entity, usually leaning instead to HTML pages and graphics to get the information (and the point) across. In the case of FEH, indicative of the textfiles of the time, it is sometimes very hard to tell where the parody and where the seriousness lay within the issue. While a lot of it seems to be a thought-out send-up of the badly-spelling hacking community, some serious and researched information is included as well. This magazine went on to several additional issues, each of them a little more serious than the last. For better or worse, this is how things came to be in the culture.
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gems.txt 75172
 GEMS: The Untold Story, by the Video Vindicator (February 1, 1992)
The Video Vindicator came late into the game (early 1990's) but produced some of the most wonderful files from that time period. This file caught my attention because he chose a subject that would normally be of very little interest to the BBS crowd (Gemology) and takes it to a completely new level by turning it into both a wonderful history lesson about Gems (I learned a lot in this file) and twisting it into yet another way to scam the planet for some extra bucks. Breathtaking in his audacity, and completely slick in his delivery. One to watch.
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groupass.phk 1809
 An Unforgettable Telephone Service Call, from Pat Routledge
This breed of textfile tends to be short, amusing, and perpetuated endlessly. Often the story is hard to track back, and is even more often a paraphrase of what actually happened, but it never fails to be humorous, especially if it lasted this far. A classic "urban legend", even if it's true.
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hack1.hac 7960
 The Basics of Hacking: Introduction, by The Knights of Shadow
The Knights of Shadow produced a collection of Hacking How-Tos that instructed users how to get around a variety of mainframes, including Digital and Data General Machines. While the information in these texts might not be as relevant, this introduction stands apart for its preaching the idea of hacking for knowledge, and leaving no footprints and destroying nothing in the process. Their definition of "Hacker" is rather interesting, as well. A clever set of files.
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hack11a.txt 692945
 The Project Gutenberg E-Text of Bruce Sterling's Hacker Crackdown
In 1993, Science Fiction author Bruce Sterling aimed his considerable writing talents to dissecting and understanding all the forces at work between Hackers, Police, and the people they've had an effect on. He does a very admirable job. While no book (so far) has captured the 1980's computer hacker experience perfectly, this book makes you come away with a feeling that the major issues were touched on and that no-one (on either side) got the short shaft. (This is a major accomplishment in itself.) Sterling is an excellent writer, and while compared to other works in this directory this textfile is a bit on the mammoth side, it's worth it. This file also highlights the work of the great Project Gutenberg, which for 20 years has endeavored to transcribe as many classic works to electronic texts as their staff of volunteers will let them. There's an entire directory of these important and breathtakingly huge projects on textfiles.
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hack7.txt 3988
 The Conscience of a Hacker, by The Mentor (January 8, 1986)
The Mentor's angry scream against the authorities he saw as trying to crush his spark and the spark of people like him. For some reason, this file became the flashpoint that a number of books (including Bruce Sterling's) used as an example of the oppression of the intelligent and the motivations behind the fine art of hacking. Whether it stands up to this sort of light or not, it's a clear statement from someone who feels a lot of pain; and that's what communication is all about.
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hack_ths.txt 148109
 The Social Organization of the Computer Underground, The Thesis of Gordon Meyer
Mr. (Probably Dr.) Meyer's Sociology paper on the social structure in Hacking, Phreaking, and Pirating groups is interestingly dedicated to George Hayduke (writer of the "Get Even" series of revenge books) and Barry Freed (The pseudonym taken by Abbie Hoffman when he was a fugitive from the FBI). This indicates not a little leaning on the side of the groups he's analyzing. He goes over impressions that the media have about hackers, what being a hacker, phreak or pirate consists of as he sees it, and then tries to draw conclusions of what this all means. Written in 1989, this file takes on the subculture with a non-hysterical point of view that makes it very easy to read. Worth the time.
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highdoc.ana 1408
 How to get Really Soaring High on Gatorade, by Max Madd
Some of the most entertaining textfiles are the ones where the writer is obviously hot to write one, but has no actual information to report on. Instead, they pull up a in-the-rough concept, like getting high off a fruit drink, and create a short file around it. In this case, the key is to get high off the thirst-quenching Gatorade, by merely drinking it as fast as possible. Nearly a third of the entire file is a legal disclaimer, a typical gesture that is very likely meaningless in the long run.
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howtobbs.txt 9216
 How to Become an Unsuccessful, Burned-Out SysOp
From the perspective of 24-hour, super-high-speed internet connections, it's refreshing to read this list of tips telling people how they can improve their single-line, often 2400 baud BBS lines. The hundreds of bulletin boards popping up every month during the early 80's ensured that general guideline files actually had a large target audience. Of course, the comment about free software being inherently bad doesn't seem as relevant anymore...
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iaad.txt 71551
 How Pirate BBSes Impact on the Entire Atari Community, by D.A. Brumleve
This serious report, tracking the theoretical impact of piracy on the Atari ST publishing community, has an unintended secondary effect of documenting and providing an excellent picture of the typical "Pirate" BBS in the early 90's. Besides capturing interesting quotes and entire file directories, this report gives a solid overview of this underanalyzed social phenomenon. Interesting reading, if a bit heavy-handed in some places.
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icegun.ana 11253
 A Step by Step Guide to Making a Dry Ice Gun by The Voice Over
Please don't follow the instructions in this file; I can't vouch for its truthfulness or safety. This file is a typical weaponry/anarchy file, inviting you to build some dangerous thing for the purposes of destruction or entertainment. Unlike many such files, The Voice Over can spell, and he warns you how much you can injure yourself. These files comprise a massive subset of the textfiles of the 1980's; why people dedicate such effort to proving they can blow up more than anyone else is an interesting outcropping of the one-upmanship prevalent in other parts of the culture. An unusually academic file from Metal Communications.
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infobugs.adv 3930
 A Collection of Infocom Bugs, from the New Zork Times
I'm not entirely sure this file comes from the New Zork Times, but the "we" tense of the description of the bugs and the invitation to try new things on the end smacks of it. Infocom was a text adventure game company - by pretty much any measure, the best. They had some of the most evocative games to come out at the time, and few game companies today even come close to the experiences that Infocom provided. Because the games were so detailed, the types of bugs that people would encounter were strange indeed, and this file chronicles some of them. Neat.
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intohell.hum 11233
 Hacking Into Hell, by The Raver
The Raver serves up a very odd blend of heavy-metal/satanic imagery, geek humor, and suspense in this story of a hapless user hacking into Lucifer's Mainframe. The Metal AE, where this file originated from, was host to a whole gang of Heavy Metal blasting computer geeks, and that weird matchup shows in nearly every textfile that came out of them. An evocative file, to say the least.
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intro.hum 5827
 The Utopia BBS Login Screen: "Pansy's Homemade Mainframe"
The first of two login screens from the Utopia BBS on this top 100 list. The Utopia BBS was one of hundreds of Apple II GBBS boards out there, written in BASIC and therefore completely modifiable (the additions were called 'mods') by the Sysop or Co-Sysops. In the case of this particular board, you could log on each day and see a completely different board, with different menus, login screens, and the rest. This time, they make you type your password in several times, only to show they were completely kidding with you. The long message about whether to create a Utopia II and the odd logoff screen (after I was ejected for not being "validated" yet) only add to the fun.
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jihad.nfo 17260
 The JiHAD Courier Information File
This particular file doesn't hold any particular historical significance; I pretty much chose it at random because it was a good example of a Tag file, and one of a Courier Group at that. Tag files are little pieces of text usually attached to a pirated piece of software, that tells you information about the group that cracked file, or what kind of program you'd gotten, or even whatever news had gone on it that group recently. Courier groups were an interesting phenomenon of the past decade, where the process of cracking software and distributing it separated and separate groups formed for each function. Crackers could then merely send a program to the contact for the Courier group, and the file would be spread along to the "usual channels" within a day or two. Interesting scene.
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k-k00ld.hum 5158
 The History of Real K-K00L D00DS, by The Edge
While the still-common habit of bad spelling (replacing U for You, 0 for O, Z for S, and similar gunk) in communication might seem a somewhat new fad, in fact it goes back for over a decade. In this file (circa 1985), you can already see that it's been around long enough to be made fun of in a parody text. The Edge engages in a pretty amusing sample "chat" session in the middle of the file, that really makes me laugh, because I really did get users like that. And people think talking like this is still cutting edge?
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killsant.hum 3497
 How to Kill Santa Claus Dead! by the Outland
The Outland (of the Neon Knights) ran the first board I was ever a Sysop of, Milliways. You would never know it if you met him, but when the Outland sat down to write files for Metal Communications and the Neon Knights, he would just spew forth some of the most violent, anarchistic, nihilist text to come out of any file-writing group. Besides Santa Claus, other targets of his files included the Easter Bunny, mailboxes, the local neighborhood, and in one case, I recall, the entire planet. He was certainly in character with the other members of the Neon Knights, where violence was the main driving force in the writing, but knowing him personally gave me insight that for him, it was actually just all fiction, another neat thing to do.
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killshco.ana 16886
 The SchoolStoppers' Textbook
The Yippies, or "Youth International Party" were a political group from the late 60's and early seventies that were really the grandfathers of a lot of the computer "underground" that flourishes today. They staged protests, wrote interesting books and articles, and published the Youth International Party Line (YIPL) which later became TAP, a predecessor of the currently famous 2600 magazine. Among their famous members were Abbie Hoffman and Jerry Rubin. This reprinted article is essentially a checklist for causing utter anarchy at your local school, so as to completely disrupt the learning process. Angry but witty, this was where a lot of later "anarchy" files took their style from, knowing it or not.
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krckwczt.app 137510
 Kracowicz' Kracking Korner: The Basics of Kracking Parts 1-9
The world of Apple II Copy Protection was a hot battlefield throughout the Apple II's production life, with commercial developers spending thousands on new copy protection schemes and crackers rising out of the woodwork to "crack" these programs, make them copyable, and distribute them. With Krakowicz, you had a Software Company's worst nightmare: A literate, intelligent crackist who made a supreme effort to teach others. What is most striking about this series of files is not just the amount of detail and research that Kracowicz put into his writing to make it understandable to others, but his unique hardware-based solutions to the software that was being piped through his Apple II. By creating boards, switches, and hot-wiring his chips, he could exert incredible control over the programs he was attempting to crack. The companies didn't have a chance. Kracowicz stands alone.
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lay-girl.txt 16308
 The Complete Guide of Laying a Girl v1.1, from John Smith
Probably the most amusing textfiles I occasionally stumbled across were those attempting to teach you the birds and the bees, or at least how to get laid. Usually in the form of "how-to" guides, these textfiles were usually completely out of left field, totally lacking in any accuracy or truly helpful information, and more likely than not someone's complete fantasy from watching too many teen exploitation flicks. In the case of this particular specimen, Mr. Smith seems to have as weak a grasp on the English language as he does on the particulars of intercourse or romance. Such stunning phrases as "Stack you hand gently under her trousers and move your hand more deeply evert time" guarantee that you're going to take this file with an oven-sized grain of salt. Sadly, this file is among the best of the bunch -- many of the others indicated rape or kidnapping as appropriate means to seduction. A fountain of ignorance.
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leeches!.hum 11312
 The Society of "Leeches" in the Telecommunications World, by Mister I/O
"Mister I/O" was the first name of The Outland, who later went on to join the Neon Knights and Metal Communications. In this file, he skewers the world of "Leeches", users who connect to systems and take all the files without donating any of their own. This particular kind of file (ridiculing other groups within the subculture) were plentiful by this time, but I think his stands out for that completely bizzare chart of the lineage of Leeches. Additionally, he even throws in some mathematical equations to determine your "leechiness". This file was written before his files took on a much more violent (but still witty) turn, as mentioned previously.
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lod-1 213571
 The Legion of Doom/Hacking Technical Journal Volume 1, by the LOD
I can remember when the Legion of Doom was just one of a group of punk kids hanging around on some of the same BBSes that I frequented. But someone or several someones within the group threw a ton of energy into the LOD, and they quickly rose to the forefront of Hacker/Phreaking groups of the time. The advantage of years of hindsight and a number of books have brought the group much more fame and regard historically, but even the most cynical or skeptical observer had to admit; this group produced. A prime example are these Legion of Doom/Hacker Technical journals, an indirect response to Phrack and other hacker magazines. The LOD/H Tech Journal was heavy, meaty stuff for the time (1987) with schematics, statistics, and even attributions to the files that had come before it. The series is worth reading as a prime example of the "highbrow" hackers, who put on the airs of having the knowledge to share, while raising the ire of those who didn't.
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lozers.hum 24778
 The Official 1984 Lozerlist, by The Atom (March 3, 1985)
The Atom's bile-spewing, gossip-heavy "Loser List" comes in as one of the best examples of an all-around "Rag File" that I've seen, where the writer takes everyone on and attempts to completely slam them into the ground on all sides. Personal info, analysis of the groups they belong to, rumors and innuendo are all up for grabs as he decimates a lot of the "big names" in the 914/212/718 BBS world (as well as a few from the midwest). It appears a lot of his hatred comes from the Richard Sandza articles (also in the top 100), but more than that, he has it in for nearly anyone who has become in some way "famous" or "legendary" in the Phreak and Piracy world. Quite a piece of work. I never found a 1985 list or anything since.
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ludeinfo.hum 9298
 Basic, Intermediate and Advanced Luding, by Sinbad Sailor
While calling an interesting BBS called the 1985 BBS (the last four digits were 1985, it came up on January 1st of 1985 and went down December 31st, 1985), I stumbled upon this small social phenomenon called "Luding". The board was reeking with it; there was a Luding sub-board filled with messages and there were a good number of instructional "Luding" files, not to mention some Luding poetry and fiction. Naturally, this really threw me for a loop, and while the actual idea of "Luding" is somewhat tame, these set of files stand out to me as excellent examples of how just writing about a small little fad in your hometown could blow the entire thing out of proportion to the point that you thought you were really missing out on something big.
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mathimp.txt 4177
 Impure Mathematics: The Story of Polly Nomial
What we have here is probably the all-time marathon-running Usenet humor file. A collection of mathematic inside jokes used to tell a running set of sexual innuendo, this story of the hapless Polly Nomial and Curly Pi was the kind of file you'd trip over time and time again in different file directories. There are a good amount of sequels, but you can't beat the original. Math Geek humor; what beats that?
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miami.hum 8107
 Go Bare, by Captain Goodnight (August 25, 1986)
Captain Goodnight's fictional short story is worth reading for the somewhat accurate feeling it gives of living a life primarily through a computer. There's some bad spelling and weird images mixed into the paragraphs, but on the whole, you'll come away from it either remembering memories from your own childhood or feel like you're peering into someone's life. A real gas of a story.
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mindvox 66115
 Voices in My Head: The Mindvox Overture by Patrick Kroupa
Mr. Kroupa's announcement of the creation of his new ISP caught a lot of people off guard. The tack from which he made his announcement was to harken back to the 1980's, and all the unique cultural forces at work then, that expressed themselves on the modem. In many ways, he saw a lot of what I've seen in terms of a need to preserve or maintain that time in some fashion. He additionally saw a need to make those times come back by creating Mindvox, his ISP by way of his company Phantom Technologies. I know that mindvox was wildly successful for a time, but the full story of its downfall escapes me. Meanwhile, this text still survives and shows an amazing breadth of insight into the BBS world of the preceding decade. This document was reprinted everywhere, so it definitely hit a nerve. I just wish we had a little more in our hands to show for it.
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modemlif.hac 11074
 The Modem Life: Is it Worth it? By Bryan Nomad (May 26, 1985) [?]
Bryan, frustrated by downed BBSes, busy signals, abuse and hatred in message bases, and the financial drain of being s SysOp, takes a different tack. He writes this heartfelt message to the BBS world at large to ask people to remember that they're all people, they're all part of a community, and it's not about how much abuse you can spew into the air, but about getting to know one another and maybe make some friends. How effective is this file at getting into a cynical heart? Who knows. One can always hope it did some good. Thank you, Bryan.
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nighhack.omn 9225
 The Night of the Hackers, by Richard Sandza, transcribed by The Reflex
There are two notable angles to this file. The more simpler one is that it was transcribed by The Reflex of Omnipotent Incorporated, a regular on The Works BBS and an all-around prolific and intelligent writer. He chose as an important addition to his body of work this article from Newsweek, published in 1984. The second angle is this article, "Night of the Hackers", which brought right to the forefront a lot of those mysterious terms that hung in the air as private knowledge and secrets for only those "in the know" in the BBS world. Sherwood Forest, Blottoland, Plovernet, tele-trials all got (unwanted) national exposure in this article, and things just weren't the same afterwards. The aftermath of Richard Sandza's life is documented in "Revenge of the Hackers", also in this collection. Studied with the span of years from it, the article is solid, interesting, and pretty accurate.
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noise.ana 3679
 Variable-Pitched Frequency Generator, or How to Annoy Your Teachers, by Captain Quieg
The Captain provides you with an accurate (I had one built), inexpensive, and mostly harmless prank electronic toy that would emit an extremely high-pitched noise, such that many people could get headaches from prolonged exposure. Not exactly a gentle diversion, but unforgettable. While this particular diagram worked, it was a relatively rare thing to come away from an electronics document and have everything function as claimed. Educational.
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paging_g.ame 4275
 The Paging Game, by Jeff Berryman
Trying to explain this one to anyone who doesn't know the concept of "memory paging" is a little bit of a losing battle. Essentially, a machine with memory that pages will throw out unused parts of programs or files onto a disk drive, ready to bring it back if you really use it. If you think MY explanation's a little choppy, wait'll you real THIS file. A golden piece of work from 1981.
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peat.hum 532
 The Peat Moss Incident
The best size-reaction ratio of the textfiles collection. Surreal.
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pezrambl.oct 20975
 Mr. Pez's Rambling About Textfiles and Leeching, by Mr. Pez (March 13, 1987)
Mr. Pez was another Works regular, always there with a quick wit and a really snooty attitude. Besides being on The Works, he also graced several other 914 boards and The Dark Side of the Moon (408) with his acidic attitude. In this file, he decided to just turn on his word processor and talk about whatever for as long as he could. To our advantage, the subject he chooses is Textfiles, which gives us insight into the type of world a teenager lived through in 1987 BBS terms. Most amusingly to me, he recounts the time I sat there copying all my textfile collection onto his hard drive trying to convince me to have his guitar and some cash. (The attempt was unsuccessful, and Donna married some other guy.) A personal trip down memory lane, but relevant to get some insight into where my editorial bent is as well.
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phrack.01.phk 29195
 Phrack Magazine Volume One, Issue One, edited by Taran King (November 17, 1985)
The Phreaking/Hacking magazine that changed everything. While other electronic magazines existed before Phrack, none took the voice of the underground and presented itself as such a dominating, matter-of-fact entity as the Phracks have. Through the years, Phrack has always been dependable as a solidly-written, interest-gathering, packed-with-talent compilation of hot topics going throughout the Hacker Underground as most people have come to understand it. Electronic zines as a general force were usually created so that individual writers' work wouldn't get lost in the wash of sites; by hooking up with a dozen other articles, relatively monstrous 50k-100k files could stand out from the endless grouping of 2k and 15k files that others were putting out. It worked.. very few people don't remember Phrack in some fashion if they were involved in BBSes in the late 80's. This brings us to the other example issue...
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phrack.29.phk 235777
 Phrack Magazine 4th Anniversary Issue, Volume Three, Issue 29 (November 17, 1989)
By the fourth year of publication, Phrack is an institution. The issue opens with a profile of Emmanuel Goldstein, the enigmatic and steadfast editor of 2600 Magazine (which has gone on to become a major institution itself) and progressing into deeply technological discussions involving money transfer and Internet protocols. By this time the Phrack World News, an overview of the social and legal scene around the culture had become a staple of the issues. Unstoppable.
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pokelist.app 19769
 The Wizard's Call, Peek and Poke list for the Apple ][ (May 1984)
Part of the immense charm of the Apple II series of computers was how they would encourage their users to learn everything they could about the system, to reprogram, modify, hardwire, and otherwise mess with all aspects of the machines. What this meant was that people were getting a knowledge of the Apples that could far outstrip almost all the other personal computers of the time. Evidence of the depth of this knowledge shows in files like this one, where a good portion of the total memory locations have been mapped and all sorts of neat features make themselves known. By the end run of the Apple II's main life (late 80's) this machine could accomplish a breathtaking amount of tasks. Geeky, but a lot of fun.
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purity.txt 58845
 The Unisex, Omnisexual Purity Test v4.00 (April 23, 1988)
One of the interesting things that arose out of the ARPAnet and Internet was the way that an unbelievable amount of energy could be focused on a single project, causing it to turn into a Wonder Of The World in a very short period of time. In the case of this file, the goal became to determine a person's "purity" by creating a list of questionable non-innocent acts that they could perform in life, and whatever percentage they had not yet done, was their purity. Of course, after dozens of entries into this document, it's become this complete other world, with every degrading, exciting, bizzare thing that someone could do with someone else (or themselves, or a group of people, or food) is listed. There are actually divergent, unrelated versions of this idea up on this site, but I chose this file because it lists out a great pedigree that goes back to 1982, and it's particularly well-written. Head-swimmingly sick.
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real.pgmrs 23955
 Real Programmers Don't Use Pascal
One of the most interesting fads to hit the online world were the "Real" files. Based loosely on the pop culture book "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche", these files presented a framework where others could just list their idea of what a "real" hacker or golfer or restaurant or whatever. It's an addictive way to describe things, and this explains the dozens and dozens of "real" files that pervaded BBSes throughout the decade. In the case of the "Real Programmers" file, the writing style of the author is particularly well-crafted (although I can't really judge the accuracy of his assertions) and it therefore has a very large distribution. Geeky humor.
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realpez.oct 16384
 Real PEZ Devotees, by Mr. Pez
The Works BBS's own Mr. Pez makes his own contribution to the "Real" files canon with this file about the followers of his BBS, "Pez Devotees". In the case of this file, the combination of his mention of all the different things he personally liked (including clothes, bands, sports and writing style) combined with his edging into nearly all aspects of a person's life to provide guidelines to be one of his devotees, makes this one of my favorite files. It should be noted that this file is a derivative of the original, the "Real Pirate's Guide", below.
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realpira.hum 6529
 The Real Pirate's Guide by Rabid Rasta [?]
Seizing the opportunity to make a humor file based on the now-popular "Real Men Don't Eat Quiche" idea, Rabid Rasta made what is generally agreed upon to be the first of the BBS world's "Real" files, files which explain what the difference between "Real" and "Fake" was. In the case of his file, he puts down what makes a "Real" pirate, including assertions about computer and modem speed, writing style, and spelling. With the exception of "The Real Programmer's Guide" (which shows up a little earlier than this file, although only on ARPAnet and not on the BBS/AE world), this file seems to have been the one that started it all. The observations he makes are both humorous, and insightful into where the world was in 1984 if you were living your life through a modem.
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revhack.omn 6266
 Revenge of the Hackers, by Richard Sandza, Transcribed by The Reflex
The writer of "Night of the Hackers" for Newsweek revealed in this followup article that his life became quite a living hell for him after the original article was published. His credit cards were hacked, phone calls came 24 hours a day, and, to a lesser relevance, he went on "tele-trial". Tele-trial appears to mean that he had a message base fill up with messages about him. Either way, his article shows the kind of full-on attack that the hacker community was capable of pulling off at the time, completely unorganized and out for blood. The Reflex, as always, does an impeccable transcription job.
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revolt.dj 2358
 Dick and Jane Instigate a Popular Revolution, by The Deth Vegetable and Iskra
Deth Vegetable and Iskra were both co-sysops of The Works way back when, before they both joined the Cult of the Dead Cow and moved on to greener pastures. (Actually, Iskra then came back and became the SysOp of the most recent incarnations of the Works, so it's all kind of circular in a way.) In any event, they got their heads together in the early 1990's and wrote this file, a parody of the "Dick and Jane" books that my generation lightly heard of. Short, sweet, and funny. Oh, and political.
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safeinfo.fun 2176
 The Safehouse Blueprints, from the Safehouse BBS
The Safehouse BBS was one of the mid-80's "Super" BBSes that were pushing not only that they were the places to be, but that the technology and pure computing power at their disposal made them inherently irresistible. Now, looking back over the years with a more solid technical knowledge, some of the claims in this BBS information file are questionable (It's a modular program? What does that matter!) But you can see an example of how technology presented its own inherent sexiness to the BBS user.
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sexsatan.hum 8979
 Sex with Satan, by Psychoe
Ah, where do you begin with "Sex with Satan". Psychoe's tale of murder, sexual mayhem, the Lord of Darkness and overactive babysitters never fails to floor me with its perfect blend of comic rant and erotic literature. You come away from reading it completely dazed and unsure what you just read. While you begin to read the file thinking you're to be subjected to another set of poorly spelled pseudo-erotic scribblings, you quickly realize as the character dies that something is quite amiss. After a short time you can't keep track of who is who and why the poor guy keeps getting lit on fire. Another great example of the Heavy Metal/Geek combination that showed up in a small number of AE lines in the 80's.
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spock.art 5904
 Digitized Picture of Star Trek's Mr. Spock
One of the nicer ASCII Art Files out there, this appears to have been some sort of program output that looked at a graphics file of Mr. Spock and then mapped it to different ASCII characters based on how "dark" those letters and numbers and characters were. If you print it out so that it's black letters on a white background, it looks pretty darn impressive. Of course, actually printing it out and putting it on a wall would immediately tap you as a geek, so be careful, and have a shredder at hand.
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stupidki.hac 4942
 The Destructiveness of the "Kids", from an Anonymous Source
A writer reaches out to the community to lament the loss of the days of the Open System and the unprotected BBS, and gives some (occasionally gleeful) descriptions of the steps he's been forced to take to protect himself. The exact tone of this missive is a little hard to track: in some places he's nostalgic and out of sorts about the way the world has changed, and in others he's the first to the forefront of implementing clampdowns of security and creating traps for any hapless hackers attacking his BBS. Definitely makes you think, if not too hard.
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suicide 10438
 Getting Others to Commit Suicide, by The Blade of the Neon Knights
The Blade was one of the leaders of the Neon Knights, who themselves were an elite portion of the Metal Communications team, purveyor of textfiles throughout the BBS world, but mostly through AE lines. With their unique blend of Heavy Metal, Satanism, and Geek Chic, the group put out some of the odder files out there. In the case of this file, The Blade tells you how to drive others to self-destruction, so as to make it easier to get into college or a well-paying job. A graphic collection of sick suggestions; just the soft of thing you could expect from this group. Are people really afraid of this sort of thing?
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taoprogram.pro 27266
 The Tao of Programming, by Geoffrey James
Mr. James' gentle and intelligent retelling of the idea of the Tao redone for programming, hardware, and software. This soft of file, meant to be a light parody of another, more famous work, ends up standing up pretty well on its own. There's one for documentation as well, and there's other more pop-culture books expounding on the Tao you can purchase these days. A good read if you believe in it or you don't.
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taping.hum 5117
 The Taping I, by Underwarez
A particularly virulent example of a "Rag File", a file whose entire purpose was to tease, slander, or otherwise ridicule another member of the same (usually pirating or phreaking) subculture. In this particular rag, a hapless user named Jeff Spicolli is subject to implications of incest, lack of technical knowledge, bestiality, and other similar traits, ending with his voice telephone number. This type of file would start showing up on local AE lines or BBSes and while most of these rants would disappear about a week or two after the Sysops took them down, a few still hung around. The most involved set of rag files to my knowledge would be the Matt Ackeret chronicles from Anarchy Incorporated.
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tencoms.pro 1029
 The Ten Commandments of RBBS
I was never a big fan of RBBS software, mostly because a lot of the sysops I ran into had the attitude put forward in this file. Reading over the commandments, we find that the SysOp is God, that you must not use handles or speak of things not involving computers, that profanity is unwelcome, and that a full three commandments dictate what kind of advertising you may post. This file is a great example of how attitude could turn a BBS from a place of fun to a stuffed-shirt, bland, unenjoyable piece of cardboard. Then again, posting this kind of file told people what kind of administrator you were right off the bat, enabling easy and quick escape. Run.
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top10.news 4272
 The Top 10 Media Errors about the Steven Jackson Games Raid
This 1992 document from Steve Jackson games responds to some of the most blatant factual errors about the infamous "Raid" on that role-playing game company. In the course of an investigation, the US Secret Service raided Steve Jackson games and confiscated all the materials of a role-playing game called GURPS CYBERPUNK, which was played with dice and cards, and didn't even involve a computer. SJ Games were unable to have their game back for 7 months, during which time it was described as some sort of "hacking manual" that the country had to be protected from. Naturally, when all was said and done, the game was harmless and nothing what the Secret Service claimed it was. A true insight into ignorance on a massive scale.
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tr823.txt 106655
 The Internet Worm Program: An Analysis, by Eugene H. Spafford
The Internet Worm changed a lot of minds about how interconnected and insecure the Internet was at that time. Using a combination of weaknesses and back doors in common programs, the Worm wended its way throughout the then-small Net and succeeded in crippling it. This document, written during the Aftermath, presents a well-thought-out analysis of all the methodology used by the worm, as well as a general oversight of the state of the Internet of the time. Long, but worth it.
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upc.txt 6726
 Cracking the Universal Product Code, by Count Nibble
Count Nibble makes a second appearance in the top 100 files with his steady, thoughtful explanation of exactly how those silly black lines on every product in the supermarket work. What possible use this knowledge could have in one's day to day existence is pretty darn irrelevant; the point was, it was THERE, we WANTED TO KNOW, and Nibble FOUND IT OUT. That's the spirit of learning. Read and find out too.
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urine.box 4141
 Urine Box Plans, by Wolfgang von Albatross (March 2, 1986)
By the time this file appeared on AE lines across the country, "Box" files had proliferated to the point that it was hard to tell who came up with with idea first. As might be expected, parodies began appearing, including the "Blotto Box" (which would supposedly destroy an entire telephone central switching office) and this specimen, which purports to cause the headset on the other end of the line to injure or kill the user. Naturally, this file is complete fiction, but constructed with enough of a straight face to make the unsuspecting collector think they have some sort of accurate textfile. An excellent awareness test.
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utopia.hum 3193
 Login Screen for the Utopia BBS: "May I take your Order Please?"
Taking advantage of the easily modifiable source code of their BBS, the Sysops of Utopia BBS constantly (and I do mean constantly) retooled all menus, messages, login and logoff screens, and even system functions. One result of this was that you always had a surprise the next time you connected to the BBS, and you always felt like you were part of a party. Note that the system actually made me type in my password, only to ignore me and continue its merry blather for a few more paragraphs.
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vaxen.jok 15163
 VAXen, My Children, Just Don't Belong Some Places, by Mike O'Brien
Mr. O'Brien's ode to the misunderstood, mistreated VAX has achieved quite a large distribution; I keep finding it buried everywhere, in joke files and computer information sites and just generally all over. Through his sad tale of VAX abuse, Mike keeps you interested to the very end. How much of it is true is left up to the reader, of course, but somehow, it just rings enough with me to consider it real. Interesting.
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violence.txt 11481
 Fun! With Random Senseless Violence, by Count Nibble (August 2, 1985)
Count Nibble was one of the most literate of all the Apple II-era textfile writers, pre-dating similarly styled groups like Metal Communications and the Cult of the Dead Cow by years with his musical quotes, proper spelling and formatting, and choosing all sorts of esoteric subjects to write about. In the case of this file, he lists out his suggestions for causing mayhem and destruction on a boring summer's night. Through browsing his web presence, an interesting fact about Nibble made itself known to me: He was college-age when this and other files were written, bringing a maturity to both his spelling and general perspective, if not his general outlook on personal property. A pioneer.
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warbitch.txt 9225
 The Code of the Verbal Warrior, or Barney's Bitch Manual
Barney Badass, co-sysop of The Glue Ball and heady influence on a number of Chicago BBSes, rants forth with a set of instructions on how to conduct a proper "bitch war". In the vernacular of the Internet, this has come to be known as a "flame war", but the same idea holds: Long after the intended subject has dropped out of debate, two (or more) sides begin a verbal assault on each other that fills the message base with dozens of personal attacks, insinuations, libel, and slander. After a while, everyone not personally involved in the bitchwar is driven away, posting messages on other sub-boards, which causes them to be insulted for not posting on the right sub-board, possibly leading to another bitchwar. Barney Badass, himself, was a true character and the instigator of some of my finest on-line memories.
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warning.hum 2537
 Warning: This Machine Breaks Down During Periods of Critical Need!
Another light chuckle from the textfiles of the 1970s, this file warns you that the machine is more likely to break down the more you need it. The attempt to parody industrial labelling as well as the attention to clever turns of phrase marks a lot of the "big iron" humor in textfiles from professionals and college students of this time, showing they were looking for a little lightness in their otherwise stressful and highly-taxing occupations.
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warnings.ufo 1031
 THE FOLLOWING ARE COMMON SENSE WARNINGS WHEN DEALING WITH A UFO
Yes, in the event that you do come across a classic lights-flashing UFO, just follow these simple hints and you probably won't be abducted, garrotted, or experimented on. A must for overseas travellers!
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watchem.phk 3635
 Watching the Watcher Watching You, by Sir Knight (1985)
Besides the very memorable title, Sir Knight's file stands out for his call to mistrust others in the subculture as being potential enemies and agents, and to think twice before revealing information about yourself. Most noticeably, his automatic dismissal of anyone asking "how do I do this?" on public boards shows the beginnings of a trend that continues to this day. (Note also, that his portrait of the most trustable phreakers/hackers are anyone jewish, middle-upper-class, and under 19.)
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whytext.oct 2223
 Why I Prefer Textfiles, by Jason Scott (February 27, 1987)
I make a cameo appearance! This file came out of my mind one summer in my 16th year while I was home sick with the flu. As my BBS was dedicated to textfiles, I thought it would be fun to write one of my own about why textfiles were better. This file was parodied by a few of my friends at the time, but I think, looking back, my heart was in the right place. (It's still there.)
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yipl.phk 15312
 The Youth International Party Line #1, Transcribed by BIOC Agent 003
BIOC, besides being particularly good at writing textfiles of his own composition, was dedicated to preserving knowledge of the foundation that he and others were building on top of. In the case of Phone Phreaks and later Phreak Magazines, this foundation was YIPL, the house organ of the Yippies, who were a revolutionary youth group of the 1960's. YIPL provided one of the first radical magazines dedicated to learning more about technology. While the first issues (under the influence of Abbie Hoffman and others) merely called upon its readers to use this knowledge as a crowbar to smash the state, later issues (when the magazine renamed itself to the Technological Assistance Party, or TAP) brought forth a love of learning and understanding how technology affected all our lives, and a need to know who was pulling the strings. BIOC does his best to transcribe this issue as close to what it looked like when hastily-scrawled copies were sent out to a few dozen people in June of 1971. Good show. +

There are 100 files for a total of 2,853,285 bytes.

+ + + +

If you wish to have the entire directory conveniently archived and compressed into one file, please download +either 100.tar.gz (1101660 bytes) or 100.zip (1135379 bytes) instead of all the files separately.

diff --git a/textfiles.com/100/914bbs.txt b/textfiles.com/100/914bbs.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e22956e1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/100/914bbs.txt @@ -0,0 +1,73 @@ +67 7 + +THIS FILE WAS ORIGINALLY POSTED ON OSUNY (914)428-7216, +UNLESS OTHERWISE NOTED. SUFFICIENT CREDIT SHOULD BE GIVEN*************************************************************** +*** Extended 914 Area Code List *** +*** Updated January 15th 1984 *** +*************************************************************** + +/ Number / Name /Type /Baud rate /Type of BBS +--------------------------------------------------------------- +221-0774 /CCIS Hopewell / IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +221-2248 /Hopewell JCT / IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +225-2471 /EL Trading Place/Atari / 300/1200 /General BBS +234-6530 /Temple of Doom /Apple / 300 /General BBS +238-3160 /The Cemetary /Apple / 300 /D & D Board +246-7605 /IBBS Saugerties / IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +297-0665 /Bullet Plus /TRS-80/ 300/1200 /General BBS +343-0475 /Socraties / IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +343-1031 /CEBBS Middletown/ IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +343-5016 /TI BBS / T.I. / 300 /General BBS +352-3814 /Bear Works / C-64 / 300 /General BBS +352-6543 /Sherwood Forest3/Apple / 300 /Phreak Board +357-8791 /Satan's Hollow /Apple / 300 /Private Pirate +358-8879 /IBBS Rockland / IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +359-1517 /Sherwood Forest2/Apple / 300/1200 /General BBS +362-1422 / Telemation / CoCo / 300 /One of a kind BBS +365-0180 /MNEMATICS Net /MNFRME/ 300/1200 /Network costs $$$ +425-2060 /The DST Dungeon /Atari / 300/1200 /Phreak Board +428-7216 / OSUNY / OSI / 300/1200 /**Soon:Multuser ** +429-5616 /The Crusifiction/Apple / 300 /General BBS +471-7605 /PC Poughipsie / IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +472-7956 /The Outer Limits/Atari / 300 /General BBS +485-3393 /Bullet Plus #2 /TRS-80/ 300/1200 /General BBS +496-4155 /Penetentary / C-64 / 300 /Phreak Board +528-0104 /Crystal Caverns /Apple / 300 /Apple Users ONLY +528-5259 /Adventureland /Atari / 300/1200 /General BBS +562-3187 /CEBBS #2 / IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +623-1939 /Camalot /Atari / 300 /Atari Users ONLY! +624-8692 /The Lair /Apple / 300 /Temporairly Down +634-8385 /D.A.T.A. RBBS / IBM / 300/1200 /Great D/L 's +634-8590 /Lancelot'sCastle/Atari / 300 /Atari Users ONLY +636-0649 /DOCS 'R' US #2 / C-64 / 300 /Documentation BBS +638-4248 /Apple Orchard /Apple / 300 /** General BBS ** +638-1493 / ECS / ??? / 300 /War Board +668-3664 /DOCS 'R' US / C-64 / 300 /Documentation BBS +679-6559 /SJBBS Bearsville/ IBM / 300/1200 /General BBS +679-8734 /Woodstock RBBS /Z-100 / 300/1200 /Genaral BBS +733-4766 /S & K Telex /TRS-80/ 300 /TELEX SERVICE +733-4410 /-------------Help Line For Above-------------------- +735-9362 /Computer Dating /TRS-80/ 300/1200 /Computer Matches +738-6015 /Altered Arena /Apple / 300 /Open 1/20/85 +738-6857 /M & M Pelham /LNW-80/ 300/1200 /***General BBS *** +769-0148 /The Medow / C-64 / 300 /Decent C-64 Board +786-3705 /MuMPs (ubbs) /TRS-16/300/1200 /For UNIX users +843-4259 /RC/PM Woodstock /S-100 / 300/1200 /General CP/M Sys +942-0386 /RMN Comp Comm /TRS-80/ 300/1200 /*** X-Rated *** +942-2638 /RACS III /TRS-80/ 300/1200 /Phreak Board +961-8049 /Westchester #2 / CoCo / 300/1200 /General BBS +965-2355 /WstchsterBBS 1 / CoCo / 300/1200 /General BBS +965-7600 /Colorama / CoCo / 300/1200 /General BBS +969-2632 /New York BBS /Atari / 300 /Phreak Board + +This List is compiled By Daniel Gelman, BUT with help from +Pinball Wizard, Gimly Gnarly, Bill the Cat,and The Archnoid. + +If you find ANY of these telephone Numbers out of date (I.E. +Name Change,# Change,Disconnected & New BBS's), Please leave me +a message on THIS System. +This List Is updated Monthly +Enjoy The list! + +Bulletin to print, for list, or to exit? + \ No newline at end of file