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100 lines
4.5 KiB
Plaintext
100 lines
4.5 KiB
Plaintext
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Conspiracy Nation -- Vol. 9 Num. 72
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======================================
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("Quid coniuratio est?")
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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A SMALL-TOWN CONSPIRACY
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=======================
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Small-town sheriff Andrew Taylor receives a letter from an
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ex-convict, informing him that he will be visiting the town soon.
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The letter is cryptic: it says only that the ex-con wishes to
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"settle a score."
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Sheriff Taylor recalls that long ago he had shot the author of
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the letter, wounding him in the leg and causing him thereafter to
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walk with a limp.
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Alarmed by the potential for danger to his associate and friend
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the sheriff, Deputy Barnard Fife conspires with a gas station
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attendant by name of Gomer Pyle, and with one Otis Campbell, an
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habitue of the local jail (Mr. Campbell appears to have a
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drinking problem), to secretly guard Sheriff Taylor. Noticeably
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absent from the plot is a local barber known as "Floyd."
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The ex-con arrives by bus. He gets off the common carrier and
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limps to an unknown destination. Ominously, he carries a case
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containing what appears to be a rifle or shotgun.
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Complicating things still further is the fact that Deputy Fife,
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although armed with a pistol, in fact has no bullets in that
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pistol (although he does carry *one* bullet in a shirt pocket.)
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The sheriff himself carries no weapon.
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At home that evening with his son and an aunt who performs
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housekeeping chores for Sheriff Taylor, the phone rings. It is
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the ex-con saying he is coming to the Taylor residence to pay a
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visit. The aunt, Beatrice, promptly takes the sheriff's son and
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deserts the premises.
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Unknown to the sheriff, secret bodyguards Pyle and Campbell are
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nearby.
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The ex-con, limping and still carrying the apparent rifle or
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shotgun, arrives. He is a mean-looking fellow. The unarmed
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sheriff invites him in.
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At this point, Deputy Fife arrives. He and his secret team peer
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in through the window. They see the ex-con pull a shotgun from
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the case he is carrying.
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Thinking quickly, Deputy Fife pulls the electric fuses for
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Sheriff Taylor's home. Then, he, Pyle, and Campbell, carrying
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stout rope, rush in the back door.
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But, in the meantime, the sheriff and the ex-con have exited via
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the front door. Inside the house, in the darkness, the deputy
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and his assistants bungle badly and end up in knots.
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Outside, the sheriff fixes the fuses, the lights go back on, and
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he and the ex-con peer in through the window. They both laugh at
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what they see. It turns out that the shotgun was a present given
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to Sheriff Taylor as supposed "thanks" for helping the ex-con
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straighten up and turn his life around.
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BUT, how is it that the ex-con, a felon, can have a shotgun to
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give to the sheriff? And what about this Otis Campbell fellow
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who, under the guise of being intoxicated, is "coincidentally"
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privy to police intelligence? And most especially, why is it
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that the "good sheriff" employs incompetent Fife as deputy -- is
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the sheriff afraid that a *real* deputy might catch on to
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something?
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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Views expressed do not necessarily reflect those
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of Conspiracy Nation, nor of its Editor in Chief.
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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I encourage distribution of "Conspiracy Nation."
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If you would like "Conspiracy Nation" sent to your e-mail
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address, send a message in the form "subscribe cn-l My Name" to
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listproc@cornell.edu (Note: that is "CN-L" *not* "CN-1")
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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For information on how to receive the improved Conspiracy
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Nation Newsletter, send an e-mail message to bigred@shout.net
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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Want to know more about Whitewater, Oklahoma City bombing, etc?
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(1) telnet prairienet.org (2) logon as "visitor" (3) go citcom
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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See also: http://www.shout.net/~bigred/cn.html
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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See also: ftp.shout.net pub/users/bigred
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-----------------------------------------------------------------
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Aperi os tuum muto, et causis omnium filiorum qui pertranseunt.
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Aperi os tuum, decerne quod justum est, et judica inopem et
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pauperem. -- Liber Proverbiorum XXXI: 8-9
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