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58 lines
2.3 KiB
Plaintext
58 lines
2.3 KiB
Plaintext
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Computer Melvins..Contributed by the Watcher--Apple Manor (716) 654-POOF!
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A computer Melvin is one who:
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Is either under 5 feet tall or over 6 feet tall, not weighing over 100 pounds.
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Buttons his shirt all the way up, until his face is blue.
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Has zits that glow in the dark.
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Has Bi-focals by the age of 12.
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Wears Kangaroo shoes.
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Falls on his face, whenever a girl walks within 20 feet.
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Jacks his pants up all the way up to his neck.
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Cares more about which DOS to use than what clothes to wear.
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Watches Dr. Who every Sunday at 11, and thinks K-9 is the greatest.
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Carries his books with both hands.
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Attacks flies.
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Has a pet frog.
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Goes to CLC.
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Speaks Chinese.
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Tucks in their regulation P.E. shirt, and wears matching brown socks.
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Thinks personal hygiene is a word processor.
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Has keep out signs on his door.
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Has not been able to open his locker since 5th grade.
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Boasts to girls how much "k" his computer has.
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Drops nickels in disk drives.
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Has every single game created by man, and paid for them all.
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People call him a geek, he thinks it's a compliment.
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Can convert every number into Hexa-decimal, and then into binary, in his head.
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Favorite movie is the Karate Kid.
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Is around as social as a skunk.
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Has a password to gain entrance to everyone of his disks.
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Uses their computer on Friday and Saturday nights.
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Brings a Flip 'n' File 50's to school.
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Watches GI Joe on channel 9, every weekday at 3:30.
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-modem II or even worse, a Networker.
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When typing "RUN HELLO" puts "RUN HELLO,D1,S6,V254"
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When saving a program, always puts secret control codes in them.
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Starts their own BBS or AE line on the only phone line they have in their
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house a Commadore 64 or a Vic 20, and swear there the best.
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Has an ATARI computer and a modem that plugs into to joy port#2.
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If 1 to 5 of these apply, there is still hope; unplug your computer for one
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month; if you can do this you may still live a normal life.
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If 6 to 10 of these apply, complete cold turkey is nessesary to salvage what's
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left of your life.
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If 11-20 of these apply, you are a complete loser, at most you have 1 friend
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and probably fits in this catagory too, start thinking what sanatarium you want
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to go to.
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Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open
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