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128 lines
3.8 KiB
Plaintext
128 lines
3.8 KiB
Plaintext
DEGPUG TEXT FILE CO. presents....
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-------------------------
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HOW TO BE A COMPUTER NERD
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-------------------------
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By Pointdexter Smallpecker
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NOTE: THIS FILE IS THE SUPPLEMENT TO THE FILE ' THE COMPLETE COMPUTER
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NERD DICTIONARY ' also by DEGPUG TEXT FILE CO.
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---------------------------
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Real computer nerds are nerds.
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Real computer nerds have IBMPC-AT or APPLE ///'s with at least 256k and a hard
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drive.
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Real computer nerds hunch at the keyboard
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Real computer nerds know LISP
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Real computer nerds get hard-ons in class.
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Real computer nerds spend time in the computer center at lunch instead of going
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to the football ralley
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Real computer nerds tell their friend they hate girls but which is a lie.
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Corollary: Real computer nerds are virgins.
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Real computer nerds only T.P. jocks house.
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Real computer nerds eat sugar.
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Real computer nerds forget to take off their Bell helmets when going to class,
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thus walk into 1st period, the helmet still securly buckled
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to their head.
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Real computer nerds don't call the Haunted House - no real programming boards
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Real computer nerds don't waste their time on Role playing games.
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Real computer nerds subscribe to BYTE, COMPUTE and go to Tower Records to read
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Hustler.
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Real computer nerds call PICONET and DATATECH.
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Real computer nerds jack off with vaseline.
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Real computer nerds wear jockstraps over their underwear to school.
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Real computer nerds use soap by accident inplace of shampoo.
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Real computer nerds forget to comb their hair.
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Real computer nerds forget the magnet to their magnet lock on their locker at
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school.
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Real computer nerds listen to Doctor Demento.
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Real computer nerds digitize centerfolds. COROLLARY: real computer nerds
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collect ASCII nudes.
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Real computer nerds are interested in the subject of welding.
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Real computer nerds have read 'tits for free' text file.
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Real computer nerds sniff magic markers for kicks.
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Real computer nerds use slide rules on tests where calculators are not allowed
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Corallary: Real computer nerds have 200 doallar h.p.
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calcualators
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Real computer nerds don't hack/phreak/ or pirate. Too busy programming.
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Real computer nerds will eventually make a million dollars when they grow up,
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let cheap women with bad spending habbits take advantage of
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them, and blow all their money on the latter.
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-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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Real computer nerdettes are nerds.
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Real computer nerdettes tell their friends they hate boys but this is a lie.
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Real computer nerdettes dont get their periods 'till they're 17.
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Real computer nerdetttes don't necessary wear glasses.
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Real computer nerdettes shop a K-MART.
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Real computer nerdettes eat olvies and maynoaise plain.
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Real computer nerdettes aren't attracted to real computer nerds.
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Real computer nerdettes are interested in the subject of botany.
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Real computer nerdettes foget to wear panty hose when they wear a dress.
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Real computer nerdettes read CQ, PLAYGIRL and JACK&JILL.
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Real computer nerdettes program in PASPAL.
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Real computer nerdettes write graphics programs.
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Real computer nerdettes listen to Country Joe & the Fish, Sly and the family
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Stone and the Knack.
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Real computer nerdettes make passes at gay men.
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Real computer nerdettes phreak so they can make Alliance calls. COROALLRY:
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Real computer nerdettes give their phone # to every
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guy.
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Real computer nerdettes will eventually make a million dollars when they grow
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up, blow it on a lot of clothes and retire to be
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housewives.
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=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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----------------------------------
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CALL THE HAUNTED HOUSE at 941-7256
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-----------------------------------
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(C) 1986 DEGPUG TEXT FILE CO.
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Call The Works BBS - 1600+ Textfiles! - [914]/238-8195 - 300/1200 - Always Open
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