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<TITLE>T E X T F I L E S</TITLE>
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<B>AN APPLE PANIC ATTACK</B>
<P>
I often have moments of feeling like there's so many projects on my burners
that I'll never get back to them all, and some important or unique ideas will
be lost with me, but usually this doesn't manifest itself in a full-on panic.
<P>
I had one of those mornings, where I'm actually lying in my bed, sweating,
feeling all these obligations and promises to myself desperately slipping
out from my grasp, and me unable to regain the state of mind they were fostered
in. It's dark, I can hear myself thinking, and I feel like it's all going
to be lost forever....
<P>
Let me take a moment to try and describe one example of these attacks; maybe it'll
inspire others to help.
<P>
I don't know why, but Apple IIs fascinate me more than any other computer from
the 1980s, with the possible exception of the Commodore Amiga. This is especially
odd because I wasn't generally an Apple II owner; I had an IBM PC that I did
all my BBS transactions on, and while I did get an Apple //c in 1985, I couldn't
connect to AE lines or do Cat-Fur transfers or any of that Apple-Specific stuff.
But there was always something about the Apples I found majestic, even enviable,
with their inspired lines and soothing beige coloring. Maybe this sounds pathetic
to someone looking back, but I got a feeling of power looking at them. They were
like incredible tools, just lying there next to each other in the school's computer
room.. docked, almost, waiting for the right driver to take them to their full
potential. And this was before I had the chance to open one up and look inside...
<P>
Apples could blow a young kid's mind. They might have seen the cool way you
could do color or high-resolution plotting, and then someone would show you a
copy (always a copy) of Broderbund's Choplifter, and your eyes would just
literately pop out of your head. How was this possible? How were you seeing these
almost perfect animations of a helicopter turning, banking, and riding across
the screen? It was cool. It was beyond cool. It was something you wanted to
be a part of.
<P>
Like I said, I was a PC kid, and you might notice this social quirk today, but
back then the different home computer brands were indelible lines in the sand;
you did not cross them, unless you were scarfing textfiles from an off-brand
BBS or logging onto a C-64 board to rag on every sub-board you could find
about how another brand of computer blew chunks, until you were deleted.
This was a pervasive thing:
<P>
Frank LaRosa
<A HREF="http://www.textfiles.com/humor/COMPUTER/c64.txt">writes about the typical C-64 user</A>.<BR>
The Baron writes about
<A HREF="http://www.textfiles.com/humor/COMPUTER/c64story.txt">Commodore Users</A>.<P>
If people stayed on their own types of BBSes (say, IBM-PC based), then they
often started drawing lines on the type of BBS software being used, or the
amount of hardware hooked to the machine. This territorial battle was decisive,
all-pervading, and colored nearly every debate. What kind of computer you
owned was who you were, who you could hope to be, what BBSes you were welcome
on, what sub-boards you should post on.
<P>
Who knows this? Anyone who was there. Do they think about it now? Maybe, maybe
not on a conscious level. Is it something that is still relevant? Well, have
you ever seen a Linux and Windows user face off about their individual operating
systems? This amazing thing still goes on, this turf war over turf they don't
own, can't or won't ultimately control in a universal sense; This is knowledge
people should know about, if not for entertainment, then at least for
enlightenment. Treating other people, other special people who have learned
computers as well as you, like they're garbage and the enemy... this isn't
what it was about. It's not what it's about now.
<P>
Just gliding over the words written about the Apple BBSes of that time, I
can feel memories rushing back to me, of visiting my friends who had Apple
IIs and seeing really cool games with what seemed at the time like stunning
graphics, of clutching my small plastic box of 5 1/4" floppy disks with the
little notch cut in them to make them double-sided, and strolling into my
high school's computer lab, hoping that one of the all-important back rows
of computers weren't filled, because you had the most time to reboot the
computer into something "respectable" because games weren't allowed until 4pm..
I remember the first time I saw the Outland's 10 megabyte disk drive, in a
time where the 140k floppy reigned supreme, and the two of us plotting over
the phone how we would homestead this new unlimited space into a bustling
city of sub-boards and file areas for the Milliways BBS. We argued and
laughed and dreamed, the two of us; the Apple in his basement was how I'd
found him, and he was a friend I've never forgotten. <P>
When you opened an Apple II or II+ or IIe, and you always ended up doing so,
the computer simply invited you to experiment, to plug things in, to get your
hands on cards or expansion units or whatever else people dreamed up, and
plug them in. Memory expansion made the machine run fast and load quicker,
and additional disk drives took the pain out of copying and switching disks
when playing games. After your arms became numb from switching disks every
few sectors while copying a friend's "wares", you started to figure out how
you could beg, borrow or steal to get a second disk drive. And when you
did, or found a friend who had enough money to buy one, you watched the
two drives light their full-sized LEDs and could almost hear the data being
transferred. Disk one would light, and then disk two would light, and you'd
know by the clicks that everything was going all right.
<P>
This isn't my story. This is the story of every kid who owned an Apple.
And Apples were just part of it. Atari, Texas Instruments, Commodore, IBM,
Timex-Sinclair.... there were cultures and mores and funny and heartbreaking
stories inside each of these brand-name worlds.
<P>
It scares me that all of these wonderful things that happened are being lost in
time, being forgotten, or slimed over with slick meta-discussions made by
web-savvy and Internet-Myopic quasi-writers, all describing this unique point
in history like it was just a warm-up period before the "real" things happened,
instead of seeing it as an era in itself, a place that was both special and
terrifying, both inspiring and insipid. This is what makes me wake up and feel
like I have to spread the word with textfiles.com.
<P>
As another example, take a look at this file written by the Red Ghost about
<A HREF="http://www.textfiles.com/humor/COMPUTER/applemaf.hum">the Apple Mafia
story</A>. It's less important to me how accurate Red Ghost's actual facts are
(although he tries very hard to back them up and give corroborating testimony)
than how he unwittingly captures many more social constructs about BBSes of
the early 1980's. It's 1986 when he writes it. This is all ancient history
to him! It's all stuff that he's pulling from his memory because his younger
friend was calling BBSes and he was seeing the story of the BBS world he was
a part of being misconstrued and misrepresented. The name "Apple Mafia" isn't
a brand or functioning corporate entity; it is, even by his own admission,
an informal coalition of Apple pirates and phreaks who used many of the
same BBSes to communicate with each other. Yet he is offended that the new
crowd (2 years later) is unfairly claiming the reputation of the previous
Apple Mafia and using it to further their ends. You get in this file an
interesting cross section of handles and aliases in use around the early
1980's, and you get a feel (somewhat) for what the twisted and hard-to-follow
histories of some of the BBSes were. His unbackable statement that the 718
Queens) area code is the home of the majority of Phreaks and Pirates aside,
you walk away from reading this file with the feeling that you know more
about some aspects of this fascinating sub-culture.
<P>
My attraction to the Apple usually manifests itself to me in those moments
when I'm thinking about my different projects and I stupidly open up a browser
on my high-speed Internet connection. There goes productivity. When I'm online
at a time when my brain is fuzzy, like 6 in the morning, I usually jettison
my things I have to do and start searching here and there for rare pieces of
Apple II information. Maybe I want to know what clubs there are out there,
or if people are trying to update these machines to use such relatively recent
technologies as Ethernet and high-capacity SCSI disks. <P>
Occasionally I've stumbled across some wonderful gems, like the time I ran
into someone who gave me access to 300+ Apple II textfiles that were
"soft docs": typed-in transcriptions of Apple II Game Manuals that the
pirates put on the disk along with the cracked games. But often, I just
come up blank; I find myself trying to just look for some overview
of the times that I lived through in the 1980s, times that a lot of people
now driving the internet economy lived through and were a part of,
and there's nothing. I can't find people who are talking about the thrills
of Cat-Fur modems and getting those incredible pieces of hardware to
do four-part harmony or voice modification. I can't find people talking
about their reigns as SysOps of Apple II BBSes in any depth, beyond
the fact that they ran them from this year to that year, and then they
stopped. Why aren't people telling this story? This story is important.
<P>
I'm hoping that textfiles.com will inspire people to give context to the
ASCII, that they'll tell me and tell the world what they went through,
their joys, their heartbreaks, their experiences.
<P>
But what if it doesn't? What if my stuff becomes the only place where you
find out about Sherwood Forest II? (Do a websearch for that name, and I'm
well over half the hits!) What if it's up to me to be the person who brings
this story, this massive epic of human experience to the people who didn't
experience it directly, or who were born too late to live through it?
<P>
This is why I panic.
<P>
<I>- May 14, 2000</I>
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