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64 lines
4.1 KiB
Plaintext
64 lines
4.1 KiB
Plaintext
How To Bullshit Properly
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(________/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\__________|{{{{{{{wWwW
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Written by : Stagman44 +++++++_________+++++++++|=#=****Stagman
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(________/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\__________|{{{{{{{wWwW
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01 / 05
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Your welcome (ahead of time),
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Now the art of "bullshiting" or pissing on others inferior intelects is an old well established form of trickery
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that could be said to trace back many years (most scholars would estimate 1969 bc) but for the use of
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avoiding debate and since I know better then you I have outlined here some guidlines by which you too
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can become an honest bullshiter and more importantly one that people will believe! Just follow my steps
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and who knows maybe one day you could be as great a coniving prick as I.... well not as great since Im
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the Stagman and few step near to this greatness.
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-(Important though, you must follow each step as described or you will fail)-
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1.Always assume that your ideas are inherently better then those of other, but do so with dignity...like tell them
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"hmmm... thats a good idea,...if your a homeless crack head living in a card board condominium. Now listen to
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me before your last brain cells disolve in trying to form your next thought".
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2. Never, I repeat never admit you have EVER been wrong before or will be in the future cause as the saying
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goes "once a cunt always a lying cunt". Besides who has time to think of the past... a good bullshiter is always
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thinking of his next good scam/lie/cheat/etc. Never dwell on one thought to long (I like the 5 second rule, as
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no one thought is better then 5 seconds of my time).
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3. Always come across as pompus... if your not to brain dead from suckling your meth addicted mothers
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wilted tit maybe youll understand,...if not just go ahead and do society a favor and die.
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4. If talking to a female you want to screw always just tell them the lie they are wanting to hear (and always involve
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alcohol, or other similiar type destabilers of inhibition) like "yeah I really do care about you", and "oh we have so much
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in common", or my favorite "is it just me, or did we just have a connection". Oh, and remember to emphatize that this
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"means something", for some reason women are very dumb, and fall for things that "mean something" just be sure and
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not let them know that it only means you getting laid, and hopefully never seeing them again. (ps dont forget the classic
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"oh, now thats interesting".)
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5. Always remember that the greatest bullshiters are also the best delegators, so never do anything, but always assume
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responsibilty if asked, or put in a situation. the sole exception to the assuming responsibilty though is here is if your a
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bitch being delegated to, or if you woman needs any type of femine product, or if she is just being whiney for comfort.
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No good bullshiter has time to comfort anyone, let alone any woman.
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6. Always have a drink (alcohol for those of you weak tits whose livers still work). You will alway bullshit better drunk.
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7. Always be braging about how great it is to be you, or how sucessfull you are in this, or that. Remember to use your
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imagination here and talk about how you were voted the largest penis in porn, or how you were once a 70's Rock icon,
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or how you have your own religion were your followers worship you at the foot of your throne all day,...you know
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believeable stuff.
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8. Remember, deities are fallible, you are not so just do what ever you feel like doing when you feel like doing it cause
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no bullshiter bows to the laws of god, or man.
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9. Be sure to have lots of "beautiful" people around you because they divert attention and in that lapse of ones attention
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span being focused on you you can then plan your next scheme. Because face it people are stupid, you are not and you
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must exploit the herds weakness' at all given opportunities.
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10. When in doubt refer to rule 1
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Well that concludes this short self help formula for sucess in the fine acient art of BULLSHITLERY
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_________________________________________________________________________-
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Stagman is your god!
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